#I could have kept going but I needed to stop because I was getting worked up | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

masonmontz · 2 days

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hellooo everyone :) hope you like it

REMEMBER: english is not my first language

angst word count: 9,5k

✦‎۟ ࣭ ⊹

“Y/N has a new boyfriend” Declan spoke and silence was the response he received. Mason felt his heart skip a beat and then fall to the floor, causing Mason to get a lump in his throat.

He just stared at Dec, trying to swallow the food he had put in his mouth before hearing the news. It took a lot of effort to swallow.

“I’m not hungry anymore” Mason pushed the plate away, feeling the strange sensation in his stomach, the same feeling that kept him awake at night.

Lauren looked at him with pity and Mason felt like an idiot. Declan cleared his throat, realizing he shouldn't have told Mason the news, but what could he do if you were friends with him and Lauren too?

“Sorry mate, I shouldn't have said that” Declan apologized to Mason, but he shrugged it off, not placing the blame on Declan.

“Who is the guy?” Reece asked, because after all he is also your friend. The restaurant seemed silent with the awkward atmosphere that remained at the table and Mason just stared at the plate he barely touched.

“David. They work together” Lauren spoke and Mason looked at her, but Lauren was already looking at him waiting for Mason's reaction. Mason looked down and felt everyone's eyes on him, Dec, Lauren, Ben, Reece, Aimee and Henry.

Mason felt like he was a bomb about to explode and everyone wanted to see the moment it happened.

“Sorry guys, I’m going home” Mason got up quickly and without looking at his friends, ‘cause he already knew that everyone noticed how affected he was by the news that you were dating, but he didn't want to see the pity in everyone's eyes. “Declan, pay my portion and I'll give you the money later.”

Mason left the restaurant quickly, but he heard Aimee's heels behind him and he sighed, knowing he wouldn't be able to outrun the stubborn woman running after him.

“Mase, wait-” she called him, and Mason only stopped walking when he felt the cold air on his face, needing some fresh air. “Hey.”

“I can't take this anymore, Aimee. I can't” Mason's voice was cracked, and the state he had been in for almost two months was deplorable. “She left me in the shit.”

Mason knows that Aimee is your best friend and he knows that you two talk daily, but he needs to talk to someone ‘cause Mason feels like at any moment he will reach his breaking point.

His eyes filled with tears, and he was looking out into the cold night but Aimee could see his eyes were wet.

“I'm so sorry, Mase. I tried to talk to her about it but she won't let me” Aimee hugged Mason from the side, putting her arms around his shoulders, even though he was taller than her.

Mason looked at her devastated, and Aimee felt her own heart ache at the sadness on Mason's face.

“I really can't take this anymore, it's too much for me, Aim” Mason sighed and brought his hands to his face, because he still felt his heart tighten in his chest, he wasn't hungry and he felt like he could vomit ‘cause of the emotions that were going through him.

He missed you.

He was sad.

He was alone.

And you left.

“You know you can talk to all of us, right? We're your friends, Mason, and you can run to us whenever you need to. You don't have to deal with all of this alone” Aimee held his hand and Mason nodded, but he knew Aimee had been busy lately because she was planning her own wedding with Henry, but she was so nice that she offered to be Mason's support since you left.

“I know, thank you” Mason tried to smile, but he knew he gave the saddest smile anyone had ever seen. “Tell them I apologized for ditching dinner.”

“Don’t worry, but please, take care of yourself.”

✦‎۟ ࣭ ⊹

You and Mason have been friends for years, you met in school and you had some friends in common. Everyone knew that Mason had been in love with you since you were a teenager, but you were never able to see him as anything more than a great friend. Not since the night you kissed for the first time.

You also knew that Mason was in love with you, but sometimes things don't happen the way we want, and even though he always treated you much better than your boyfriends, there was nothing you could do if you didn't like him back.

The night you were celebrating your twenty-fourth birthday in a place where all your friends were was when Mason decided to make the first move.

He asked to deliver the gift he bought for you away from the others, and he gave you the most beautiful bracelet you had ever seen, it was gold and had your initial as a pendant, but it also had shells and stars, books, teacups and everything you liked the most. It was so delicate that you were moved when you realized how much Mason knew you.

When you hugged and thanked him that's when Mason kissed you, and that's okay, at that moment you didn't care and kissed him back. It was terrible to realize that that was the best kiss you had ever had, no one had ever kissed you so intensely, with so much love and passion.

Your mistake was going home with him after the party, ‘cause Mason was all over you the whole night and everyone could tell something was up, and you were also wrong for kissing him back every time, maybe giving Mason hope that it all meant something.

At first it didn't really mean anything, but after weeks of having sex with him, even you who had an impenetrable heart found yourself attracted and in love with him. Mason made you smile, Mason treated you well and always put you first, and when you realized that, you also realized that you never put him first. And you never would.

You were working so hard at work to get the job the company was offering in Australia that it wouldn't be fair to him ‘cause you wouldn't be able to give him what he deserves if you had to move.

Mason didn't accept staying away, so he said he didn't care if you didn't give a name to what you had. You weren't just friends but you weren't dating either, you knew his parents but not as his girlfriend, and Mason accompanied you everywhere just as... someone you were sleeping with. That was it.

For months it was like this. It was your house that Mason went to after games, it was you he called when he lost a game and wanted comfort from someone he loved or when they won and he wanted to celebrate with someone. You, always you, no one else.

Mason loved you so much that he felt his heart jump with joy every time someone said your name or when he saw a message from you on his phone. Everyone thought you were his girlfriend, but Mason was too embarrassed to tell you that you weren't his girlfriend. Even he couldn't understand what was going on between you, so imagine telling others.

But your time was limited, and everyone knew it.

Almost a year later you received the proposal you had dreamed of for so long, and you were so happy that the idea of leaving England wasn't scary at all, it was wonderful. You only told your parents at first, then Aimee ten days before you left.

You didn't know how to tell him that you were moving, especially since you knew Mason wouldn't handle it very well. He was injured and had some problems with his Chelsea contract, and Mason was looking to you every day for comfort to feel good.

He found out before you could tell him, and only because you left the plane ticket where he could see it, but it wasn't intentional, you just forgot to put it away. You still remember his face when Mason turned to you with the ticket in his hand, and you felt your heart skip a beat as you realized the argument was closer than you thought.

“Why do you have a plane ticket to Australia?” He asked quietly, but deep down you knew Mason knew what it meant.

You couldn't lie to him anymore and you had to be honest, no matter how much it hurt.

“Cause I’m moving to Australia” Mason looked at the paper in his hand once more, probably wanting to see the date. The day you would leave.

“In ten days?” You just nodded, sighing when you saw Mason’s lip tremble. He put the paper back where he had found it and stared at you. “And when were you going to tell me? When you were getting on the plane?”

“I was planning on telling you right away, you weren't supposed to find out like this.”

“It wouldn't hurt any less if you had told me sooner. How long have you known you were moving?”

“Almost two months” Mason agreed and you could see a piece of his heart break, then another and another. “C’mon, let's talk about it.”

You held out your hand to Mason, but he didn't take it and just stood there staring at you. You walked over to him and grabbed his hand, pulling him onto the couch with you. Mason sat on the couch and you knelt on the floor in front of him, resting your arms on his knee as he stared at you in so much pain that you felt your heart clench.

“Mase, you know how much I wanted this job, I worked really hard for this transfer and I finally got it” you explained to him, gently stroking his leg. “Don't be mad at me, but we knew I would have to move if I got the job.”

“It's not that I didn't want you to get the job, I just didn't think it would happen, it seemed so far away and you didn't tell me. I'm the last to know” he spoke, staring at his hands without looking at you, but you brought your hand to his chin and made him look at you. “And we both know that our relationship isn't going to work out.”

“We just don't date because you don't want to, if it were up to me you know you'd be my girlfriend” he spoke softly and you sighed, knowing it was true.

“Mase, I know you have a crush on me and yeah, I have a crush on you but-”

“Y/N, I don’t have a crush on you, I’m in love with you. I love you” he said and you felt your heart race ‘cause you never let Mason confess his feelings to you, and you knew that what he felt was much bigger. “How can you say that I have a crush on you when I've been doing everything for you for almost a year? It's not fair to me.”

“Well, I never asked you to do anything for me. Mason, I'm sorry, but I also never promised to offer you more than I already do” you got up from the floor and sat next to him, but Mason continued to stare at the floor in front of him.

“I love you and I've loved you since before I kissed you for the first time, how funny is that? And even after months of sleeping next to you, having sex, wanting to be good enough for you, you don't feel anything for me? How can you be so cold?”

“I never wanted this relationship to go ahead ‘cause I always hoped to go to Australia. You've got Chelsea, you've got enough women to last you the rest of your life, live it, Mason.”

“I don't want any other woman, it's always been you, Y/N. It's always been you, and you acting like it's nothing is what hurts me the most” a tear ran down Mason's face, but he quickly wiped it away, which was in vain because he couldn't stop other tears from falling, and before you knew it Mason was crying, sobbing. “Why are you doing this to me?”

You didn't know how to respond, so you stayed silent as you watched Mason cry. And the scene was sad, because there was nothing you could do to comfort him, what was done was done.

“I will wait for you to come back” he whispered, and then turned his face to look at you.

“Mason, that’s the point. I don’t know if I will ever come back. What if I like Australia? Or if I find someone there?” At that moment Mason felt like he was going to have a panic attack, and he was sure he was running out of air to breathe. “Go and live your life and forget about me, that's what I'm asking.”

“I can’t do this, Y/N. I can’t. I love you and I have loved you since I was eighteen, how can you ask me to forget you? How can you ask me to forget you after sharing so much of myself with you?” He stood up, putting his hands in his hair and breathing quickly.

“Don't forget me then, but I won't promise you that I'll come back.”

“How can you pretend you don't feel anything for me? You can confess it, no one has to know.”

“Because I don’t love you back.” You said it, and even Mason knew it was a lie, but it still hurt.

“You do. Don’t lie. If you don’t love me you shouldn’t act like you do” he said between sobs. “Don’t do this to me, please. I’m begging you to stay.”

“I already made my decision long ago, you're not going to change that Mason” you spoke with a lump in your throat, wanting to cry but refusing to cry in front of him and making things more difficult.

“Just say you love me back” he begged, and Mason looked like the saddest man you'd ever seen.

“I'm not going to say anything ‘cause things can't get any harder than they already are. Everything it's over between us, Mason. In ten days I'm going to Australia and you're going to stay here and conquer the world. Without me.”

✦‎۟ ࣭ ⊹

Mason sighed as he entered his quiet London flat. It was strange to return to a place that had once been the place he considered home, but now London was no longer his home, and neither was Manchester.

Because the place Mason considered home for a long time was in Australia, and now it was someone else's home.

Mason was going crazy and he was sure of it, but he swears that when he threw himself on the bed where you used to lie he smelled your perfume. That's where Mason broke down.

“Why did you do this to me, Y/N?” He spoke to himself, closing his eyes and feeling the tears run down his neck ‘cause he was lying down. A sob escaped his lips, it was the first time he had cried since the last time he saw you and Mason realized that he didn't know how to deal with the things that were happening in his life.

His contract with Chelsea ended and Mason joined Manchester United, but he was far from a happy man. Even with so many insults and threats, he didn't cry once, and every smile he gave when he went to Manchester United was fake.

Mason was just surviving and doing whatever he was told to do, ‘cause all his thoughts were about you, from the moment he woke up in the morning until the time he lay down to sleep.

And Mason even had the false idea that you were also thinking about him, but no, because now you have a boyfriend. Mason feels his own body heat up with anger when he thinks about another man touching you, kissing you in the same way he did.

Mason's phone vibrated in his pocket, and he sighed because he didn't want to look at the message. And it was something that had become a habit for him, if no message was from you, why would he be excited to receive one?

But he still picked up his phone to check and was not at all surprised to see Aimee's message.

Mason threw his phone on the mattress, looking around the room and seeing that you hadn't left anything there, not even a sock, and it was as if you had never entered that room.

The worst part is that every time Mason saw Aimee he remembered that you two were always together too, because you were like twins, you were always together and did the same things. He also heard that you and Aimee had a falling out over your decision to move to Australia, but had talked things through before you traveled.

Y/N has a new boyfriend. Declan's voice crossed Mason's mind again, and that phrase had been haunting him ever since he heard it.

Mason knew you loved him, he could see it in the touches, the looks and even the secrets you shared with each other. You were too stubborn to tell him that, and Mason knew it wasn't fair to ask you to give up on a dream, but he wished he could have heard at least once the three words he always wanted to hear from your lips. Just once was enough, because then Mason would know that all those months together had been worth it.

Mason can't understand how you don't miss him, someone you shared everything with until months ago and now he's a stranger. How can you not miss him when Mason has been missing you even when he's sleeping? Don't you miss him when you're taking a shower with your new boyfriend? The thought makes Mason want to vomit.

But now you have a boyfriend and it's him you say I love you to, it's him who asks to hold your hand, it's him who admires you sleeping.

Mason didn't know it was possible to feel so jealous of someone while having a broken heart. It's been five months since you left and Mason feels like his heart hurts more every day, and he doesn't know how long it will take for him to heal.

He needs to forget you ‘cause you've definitely already forgotten him, but he doesn't know how. Mason discovered that he needs you the same way he needs air to breathe.

But you moved on and Mason moved on with a broken heart, in a helpless state, and even though he'll never open up to anyone the way he did to you, at some point that pain has to pass.

✦‎۟ ࣭ ⊹ 3 months later ✦‎۟ ࣭ ⊹

“No, I didn't forget the dress, mum” you said in a phone call walking through the London airport while talking to your mother. She was traveling to Ireland and wouldn't be back until next week, so you were alone for the next few days. “Yes, I will wait for you to come back, you know I will stay in England for twenty days. I know. Yes, I will. Bye, I love you too.”

You almost groaned at the amount of people walking around London airport, and it would be much harder to find Aimee than you thought. After eight months, you are back in the rainy, cold weather of England, and you missed it so much that you felt like you could cry at any moment.

Aimee and Henry's wedding is in three days, and that's why you've brought yourself back to England, ‘cause you wouldn't miss it for anything.

Australia is a great place to live and you love your job there, you've made some friends but... Australia is not London.

“Y/N!” You heard Aimee's voice before you even saw her, and your eyes filled with tears when you saw her waiting for you at the airport exit. It was like a scene from a movie, but you ran and hugged each other while you cried.

“How can you go and live far away from me? My God, I hate you, I was dying missing you” she cried, and you didn't let go of each other for long minutes. “Did you miss me?”

“Of course I missed you” you wiped the tear from your tear-streaked face, and it was impossible to stop smiling when you knew you were home again. “You look so beautiful. How is everyone? Are you looking forward to the wedding?”

“I can't believe I'm without my best friend when I get married, let's start there. And yes, everyone is fine, everyone is excited to see you again” you and Aimee walked towards the airport exit carrying your bags, and the reception you received was heavy rain at the exit. Nothing better than being in England.

✦‎۟ ࣭ ⊹

“I heard you have a boyfriend in Australia” Henry said with a smirk on his mouth, and you blushed. “Why didn't you bring him?”

“First, we’re just having sex, he’s not my boyfriend. Second, why would I bring him to your wedding?” You put a piece of pizza in your mouth, wanting to ignore what they were talking about.

Josh wasn't really your boyfriend, you worked together and enjoyed being together, but he was in love with someone else and you knew it, so you never wanted anything from him. Your heart was only half in Australia too.

“And what was that photo you posted on Instagram months ago?” Aimee asked and you looked angry at her. They were nosy and wouldn't change.

“He mentioned me in his stories, what could I do?” You shrugged it off, because it really wasn't that big of a deal.

“Everyone saw it” Henry said, and he emphasized when he said “everyone”.

You looked at him and thought of Mason. In fact, Mason hadn't left your thoughts for months, he was what you thought about twenty-four hours a day. You looked at the table without looking at the two of them, and even though you didn't want to show that you cared about Mason, they were able to read your face like a book.

“You know he's coming to the wedding, right?” Aimee asked and you agreed. “It's the international break and he has a few days off, he'll be in London during those days.”

“I know.”

You were nervous about seeing Mason again after so long, even more because you left without saying what he wanted so bad to hear.

It wasn't fair to confess your feelings when you were moving to the other side of the world. It wasn't fair to him and it wasn't fair to you, that's why even after so many months with him and knowing how much he loved you, you refused to tell him how you felt about him, because you knew it would be worse.

Deep down you know that if he brings someone else it will hurt, but you can't feel hurt when it was your decision. Maybe, just maybe, if Mason is over you it means that going back to Australia and moving on is the best option, even if you feel incomplete.

God, it's so hard to love someone and want to do the right thing.

✦‎۟ ࣭ ⊹

“Should I wear red lingerie?” Aimee asked and you looked at her with raised eyebrows. “Don’t look at me like that.”

“You’re not supposed to have sex until the wedding” you looked at yourself in the mirror, admiring your bare legs in the long-sleeved black dress. “Do I look hotter or is it just me?”

“You are hot, baby.”

You and Aimee are getting ready for her bachelorette party at a club in London, one you used to go to as teenagers. She's invited her bridesmaids and other friends, and it's sure to be an amazing night.

You can't believe your best friend is getting married.

The club was full of people, the music was lively and soon you found the place reserved for Aimee's bachelor party, because there were balloons, glitter, feathers and lots of pink and white.

In Australia you made some friends but it was different being with the people you grew up with, who know you inside out and like the same things as you.

Aimee cried every fifteen minutes when she remembered that she was going to marry the love of her life in two days, and in the end someone always cried with emotion with her. She and Henry loved each other since they met, it was incredible to see how well they worked together, how much Henry treated her well or did everything for her.

You always wanted someone like that by your side.

As you watched Aimee talk to Kylie, probably about the wedding or about Henry, you remembered that you had a person like that for you.

And you ruined everything.

You felt your heart skip a beat when you thought about Mason again, and even after the drinks you had already had, you felt sad when you remembered that besides pushing Mason out of your life, you were also alone.

A few months ago, before you moved, you asked your mother how she knew that Richard, your stepfather, was the right person for her. She and your father had a bad marriage and she was not happy, and you and your sister suffered the consequences of that failed marriage, but with Richard she was glowing with happiness.

“It needs to be someone special.”

Someone who doesn't argue with you, someone who celebrates the little things, someone who makes you happy most days. Happiness isn't eternal but it's moments, and if someone makes you sad more than happy, there's something wrong.

You had someone special, and you realized it when you stared into that empty, silent apartment in Australia, far from everyone you love.

You were lost in thought, but you came back to reality when Aimee screamed and pointed behind you, and then you heard male laughter.

A laugh that you could recognize anywhere.

You smelled Mason's scent before you even saw him and your legs went weak as you realized what was happening.

“Hi boys” Aime squealed, cheering as Henry walked up to her and kissed her in front of everyone, causing the girls to clap. You’d have smiled if you weren't feeling Mason's gaze on your back.

It was ridiculous that you were afraid to turn around and look at him, but you were scared to death. You turned so you could look at his face, even if it was the only time that night. You couldn't help yourself ‘cause you needed to look at him, so you turned around.

You met his eyes before you could react, because you knew he was watching you, his gaze heavy on your back. His face was serious now, and the worst thing was that you noticed that his eyes no longer had that sparkle they had when you were together.

You were the one most to blame for this.

You couldn't look away from him but you couldn't say anything either, you were just taken out of your thoughts and had to look to your side when Declan shouted when he saw you. You smiled at your friend, happy to see him, because Declan was your family too.

“Hello, D” you hugged him, closing your eyes and feeling emotional. You don't know how you managed to go so many months without seeing them. “How are you?”

“I'm fine. And you? Did you realize that England is your place?” Lauren walked over and Declan wrapped his arms around her neck. “This woman has been talking about you every day since you moved in, I couldn't take it anymore.”

“That’s not true” she complained and rolled her eyes smiling, because Lauren was also one of your best friends. “By the way, we missed you, Y/N.”

Mason was standing in the same spot and you finally turned to him after talking to Declan, and you almost rolled your eyes when you saw them all move away purposefully. It was like seeing a ray of sunshine after a storm, and you felt like nothing else mattered when Mason had his eyes on you like you were the only woman in the room.

It was ridiculous to try to explain how handsome Mason looked. He was wearing black pants, a black men's tank top, a white wool coat and Converse.

“Hello Mason” you said, and even with the loud music he would hear, because it seemed like there were only the two of you there.

Mason scratched his throat before answering you, he seemed as nervous as you were, and deep down, you were glad for that.

“Hello” he mumbled but you could read his lips. Oh, how you missed his voice.

You took a step towards him, ignoring that everyone was looking at you, and you were lost with the Mason colony around you.

“You good?” You asked and Mason just nodded, but then Reece appeared hugging Mason by the neck and breaking the bad mood between you. He was drunk and you noticed, he was laughing at nothing and holding onto Mason. You smiled, because you had missed him too.

“Oh, did you remember you have friends?” You rolled your eyes and hugged him, feeling Mason's gaze on you. “I missed you, Y/N.”

“I missed you so much, Reece. There is no one like you in Australia.”

“Mason missed you too, but he doesn't tell anyone” Reece whispered in your ear and you smiled, not looking at Mason so he wouldn't realize his friend was talking about him, but before you could do anything, Mason left and went to Declan and Lauren. “He's been a complicated boy these past few months.”

“I fucked up with him and he hates me now” and it was true, Mason probably started to despise you after you were such a bitch to him.

“He loves you, but he is so stubborn ‘cause you hurt him.”

Mason was now on his back, and God, you just wanted to hug him and feel safe again as you felt his arms around you.

Mason ignored you perfectly for a long time, you couldn't get close to him and you didn't know how either. Was it fair to want to talk to him and then leave again? Maybe Mason is just protecting his own heart because you already broke his heart once, it's not right to break his heart again after so many months.

Henry said that he had decided to come to the same club as Aimee ‘cause he wanted to have fun with her and the boys, and you smiled at his confession. Aimee knew he was coming and hadn't told you anything, who thought it would be a girls' night.

“Where's your boyfriend, Y/N?” Declan asked hours later when you were both sitting on the beanbags, the music lower now and you could talk without shouting.

Before you could answer Mason stood up, saying he was going to get a drink from the bar even though the table was full of drink options. You looked at him disappointed ‘cause you wanted to be able to talk to him or tell him that you don't have a boyfriend, and he preferred to leave than hear you talk about another man.

“Our boy Mason is jealous” Reece laughed and you decided to go after Mason, without answering Declan's question.

It wasn't hard to find Mason, he sat in one of the chairs at the counter and had his back to you, so you quickly sat next to him. He noticed when you sat down next to him but didn't say anything, just continued to stare at the untouched drink in front of him.

“Running away is not something you usually do” you said and Mason finally looked at you, raising his eyebrows.

“I used to do a lot of things that I don't do anymore” not that you deserve Mason being rude, but it's clear that Mason still resents you.

“And that's why I know things between us aren't resolved yet” you saw Mason sigh, and you wanted so much to be able to hug him, but if you asked him to he would probably run away from you.

“Yes, everything is resolved. We resolved it when you decided to leave” Mason held the glass and threatened to get up, but you grabbed his arm and stopped him from leaving. “Please let me go, don't make me suffer again.”

“I don't want to make you suffer, Mason, I just want to talk to you for a while” you practically begged him, but Mason was still trying to pull away from you.

“Talk about what? About how my life went to shit after you left? That I was here suffering while you started a new life in fucking Australia? You wanna know about that to laugh at me because I was an idiot?”

“Don’t do that, please” you whispered, because Mason had no idea how much you suffered away from him. You never told him, of course he doesn't know.

“I gave my all to you, Y/N, and that's the worst ‘cause I still love you so much that my heart feels like it's going to jump out of my chest” he said looking at you and you felt your own hands tremble, Mason always had that effect on you. “You can't just leave and come back wanting to talk to me like everything is fine, because it's not.”

“Please don't act like it wasn't difficult for me too” You felt your eyes water and Mason shook his head in disbelief.

Because it was really difficult. You spent weeks thinking if you did the right thing, if leaving everything in England was the best option, if ending the best thing that had ever happened to you was the best choice, and there was only one answer in your head.

“Yeah, I know. By the way, where's your boyfriend? Is that why your life was hard in Australia?” Mason asked and drank all the last drink he had ordered. “I went to hell after you moved out, and while you were there enjoying your new life I stayed here because I was dropped off without notice. Don't feel rejected because I don't want you to fuck me again, you rejected me first.”

Mason turned his back and left the club without saying goodbye, leaving you alone with the guilt and regret consuming you.

✦‎۟ ࣭ ⊹

You took at least five deep breaths before ringing the bell on the white door in front of you. You also don't know how or why, but your fingerprint was still registered at the entrance to the building where Mason has a flat in London, and after convincing Aimee to tell you if he was there, she finally said yes.

You regretted it the second you rang the doorbell, especially since it was only seven thirty in the morning, but you had been up all night and would go crazy if you didn't go there. You raised your finger to press the doorbell again but heard a grumble coming from the other side of the door, and you hated yourself ‘cause you probably woke Mason up.

He opened the door wearing only underwear and a crumpled face. You swallowed hard.

“Y/n?” He spoke in a hoarse voice, and before he could tell you to leave, you entered the apartment cause you needed to talk to him. “Is there something wrong?”

Mason closed the door and looked at you, waiting for you to answer. You took another deep breath, but it still wasn't enough to make you less nervous.

“It was difficult for me too, it still is” Mason raised his eyebrow. “Don't think that just because I never said what you wanted to hear, I didn't feel anything, I just knew that our time together had an end date and there was nothing to change that.”

“Look, I don’t want to-”

“You’re gonna listen to me, Mason” you stopped Mason from speaking, and then he kept looking at you. “It's not fair for you to say that I didn't suffer, because no one was in Australia with me to know that, you don't know how many nights I cried on the phone with Aimee wanting to give up everything to go back to England and to you.”

“And I don't care if you think I don't care about you, but know that you were one of the best things that ever happened to me and you can't treat me badly like you treated me yesterday, it's not fair to me either” you stopped for two seconds to breathe, and Mason looked at you without saying anything. “You know how much I always wanted this job, Mason, and you can't imagine how much it hurts me to realize that I'm gone and I was much happier here than I am in Australia.”

A tear fell from your face and you wiped it away, Mason brought his hands to his face and sighed, taking a step towards you, but you stopped him from getting closer.

“I'm not here to ask you for forgiveness, I just needed to say a few things.”

And you were gone as quickly as you arrived, leaving Mason and his own thoughts alone.

✦‎۟ ࣭ ⊹

Mason felt like shit for the rest of the day, mainly ‘cause he knew he treated you badly. The problem is that Mason gave you everything, and when he least expected it, you broke his heart into pieces.

Those were terrible months, Mason was training, he was irritated with everyone and especially on the field, which caused him to be sent off and made the coach discuss with him. Mason spent months without sleeping through the night, got drunk at every party he went to, and even spent weeks without talking to his own family so no one would ask about you.

Aimee and Henry's wedding is tomorrow and Mason would rather be anywhere but there. He can't even imagine what it's going to be like to see you so beautiful and in a relationship with another man who's oceans away, but Mason knows it's going to be very difficult.

“Why do you have such a shitty face?” Declan asked as he took the beer Mason handed him, and Mason had been quiet for minutes while they were watching an old football match that was on the television.

“Y/N came here this morning” Mason spoke softly and threw himself onto the couch, sighing as he remembered the words you spoke to him. “I feel like shit again, bro.”

“You've been feeling like shit for eight months, my friend” Mason rolled his eyes, but he couldn't disagree. You came back and turned over all the feelings that Mason thought were gone, when in fact they were stored and emerged to squeeze his heart again.

And he knows that in a few days you'll be gone again, he knows it'll be shit again and it'll be another eight months to forget everything.

“I feel like we haven't ended things between us yet, but I'm not ready for that. Man, I love her so much, she's gonna kill me again” Mason confessed, and for months he hadn't talked about you to anyone but Aimee. His mother would always ask, but Mason wouldn't talk about it to her, or anyone else.

The funniest thing was that even the fans said that there was something wrong with Mason, but he always said that everything was fine while putting that sadness deeper in his heart.

“Don't let her bring you down again then” Declan said it like it was obvious, but it was easy for him because he had Lauren, Jude and he was happy.

“It's not that simple.”

“Make it so.”

✦‎۟ ࣭ ⊹

“You look so pretty, I'm gonna ruin my makeup from crying this much” you said as you shook your eyes to stop crying as you looked at Aimee in the wedding dress. “I have never seen such a beautiful bride.”

“Please, stop, you're making me emotional and I can't cry” Aimee said looking at the ceiling, and then you approached and hugged her, saying once again how beautiful she was. “You look beautiful too, that color looks wonderful on you.”

“I know, I really look good in blue” you joked, and she laughed as the two of you checked to make sure everything was ready for Aimee to get married. “Let's check if we have everything.”

Aimee agreed and went to the window to see the place where the ceremony was taking place. All the guests were already there and in a few minutes it would be her turn. The day was beautiful, and everything was perfect. You walked over to the window, looking down at where the guests were sitting, and even without meaning to, your gaze quickly found the person who had been your thoughts for months.

Mason was laughing with Declan and Reece, and he had no way of seeing you there but you could even see his eyes closing as he laughed. He looked so happy, he didn't look like the same sad-hearted man you'd met two days ago, and for a moment you felt good that Mason was smiling.

“Did you talk to him?” Aimee asked, and you nodded.

“He hates me” you shrugged because it's the truth.

“He doesn't hate you, don't be silly, Mason loves you so much, he just didn't know how to deal with you leaving.”

“It doesn't matter now” you wiped away a tear and turned to Aimee, smiling at her. “So, something old?”

“My grandmother's earrings” Aimee pointed to her grandmother's gold earrings, and they really were beautiful.

“Something new?”

“My dress.”

“Something borrowed?”

“My shoe.”

“Something blue?”

“The sexy lingerie I'm wearing underneath.”

“Oh, spare me the details” you rolled your eyes, and then smiled nervously ‘cause the time was finally coming. Aimee's father came in to call her and you finally left, but not before wishing her good luck.

You went down to where the ceremony would be and greeted a few people, some surprised and happy that you were back in England. Lauren waved and called you over, so you quickly walked over to her, sighing because Mason was there too. You felt your hands sweat as you walked down the hallway, as well as your heart racing.

“Hey guys” you said and almost groaned when you saw that the empty seat Lauren had saved was next to Mason. “Is this place for me?”

Mason looked at you and you almost forgot how to walk, because he had this effect on you, making you nervous with just a look. He was so handsome, he looked like he was ready for his own wedding. You quickly looked away from him, but Mason didn't stop looking at you for a second.

“Sure” Lauren smiled and you wanted to kill her. You sat next to Mason, controlling your breathing, and even so he didn't stop looking at you, leaving you blushing.

“You're drooling man, control yourself” Reece spoke softly to Mason, and Mason cleared his throat and shifted in his chair, making RJ laugh. You were talking to Lauren because you had nothing to talk about with Mason, but his cologne was all around you, making you drunk by the smell of the perfume he had been using for years.

Everyone cried or got emotional when Aimee walked in, especially Henry who cried like a baby when he saw her walking towards him. You and Lauren were almost sobbing throughout the ceremony, and Declan was already laughing at you.

When they said their vows was when you and Mason looked at each other, and a racing heart because of his deep gaze on you made you come closer and hold his arm, leaning your face against his suit in a loving way, and it was the closest to love you had come in eight months.

Because Mason means love to you, and not even so many months apart have changed that.

✦‎۟ ࣭ ⊹

“I'm nervous, I forgot the speech paper” you whispered to Anthony, Aimee's brother, and he shrugged with a laugh.

“Not my problem, Y/N, I've already said my speech.”

“Okay, I can do this” you took a deep breath and he helped you climb onto a chair. Everyone had already eaten dinner and everything was so spectacular, it would be a wonderful night for your best friend.

You trembled as you saw all the eyes on you, but you held the microphone and smiled to pretend you weren't nervous.

“I wrote some words on a piece of paper but I forgot the paper at home, so I'll have to improvise, I hope the bride and groom don't mind” everyone laughed at what you said and you felt your cheeks heat up, speaking in public wasn't very easy, speaking at a wedding was even worse. “I remember the day Aimee came to me when we were in college a few years ago and said she met the coolest guy in the world and I said "impossible, no man is the coolest in the world" and yet she said he was.”

“In fact Henry, you proved that you are really a very nice guy and Aimee was right, ‘cause she shines when she looks at you, just like we can see in your eyes how much you love her. I could tell you all about some of the embarrassing moments of the two of them, but I prefer to talk about love cause I think everyone would like to hear it.”

“I once asked my mom how she knew my stepdad was the right person for her and she told me it had to be someone special. It's a person who doesn't mind being silent by your side because they know that everything is fine even without talking. It's someone who makes you happy just by remembering that person for a minute of the day or the whole day. It's someone who doesn't judge you, doesn't embarrass you or devalue what you feel.”

Even without wanting to, your gaze fell on Mason, and he was staring at you on top of that chair with a microphone in your hand. He was paying attention to every word that came out of your mouth and you almost lost focus because it hurt so much knowing that you would never have him in your life again.

“You two are each other's special person. I'm sure everyone here has someone special, and it's worth dropping everything when you know you have someone by your side to love you and go through everything with you, because that's how love works.”

Your eyes filled with tears and you had to stop looking at Mason ‘cause even he got teary-eyed listening to you. You looked at Aimee and she was crying and trying not to ruin her makeup as she ran her hand over her eyes, and Henry next to her smiled as he wiped a tear that ran down his face too.

You also had to wipe away the tear that ran down your face.

“Here's to Aimee and Henry. May their lives be wonderful” you raised your glass of champagne and everyone raised their own, toasting to their new life together. Anthony helped you down from the chair and you quickly went to your seat, but in reality you wanted to go out and cry.

Mason didn't take his eyes off you and you started to feel suffocated, especially since he hadn't even wanted to come near you for two days and he still left you in pieces when you tried to talk to him.

“I've never heard such beautiful words, Y/N” Aimee Aimee hugged you and you smiled, still with tears in your eyes. “Thank you for coming, thank you for being my best friend. I love you so much.”

“I love you too, Aim.”

You didn't even make it to the table because everyone stopped to congratulate you on your beautiful speech, and when you finally got there, Mason was no longer there.

“Where is he?” you asked RJ, and he said that Mason had gone to the bathroom, before anyone could stop you again, you went to look for him.

You waited a few minutes before Mason came out of the bathroom and saying that he was surprised to see you waiting for him was nothing new. You stared at each other for a few seconds before another guy came out of the bathroom and you and Mason had to break contact, so you pulled him by the hand and walked down the hallway until you found another door.

Mason didn't say anything as he followed you, and when you saw that it was a warehouse and there was no one there, you went in and pulled Mason with you, pushing him against the wall.

“I love you” you whispered and Mason's eyes widened, shocked because he finally heard the three words he wanted to hear so much. Maybe it was too late and you would never be together again, but at least you got your feelings off your chest and told Mason. “Oh my God, I love you.”

“What?” Mason put his hand over his mouth, not wanting to show his smile, but he was smiling so much it was impossible to hide it. “I didn't hear.”

“I love you, I love you, I love-.” You had never felt such relief when Mason reached out and pulled your mouth against his.

Kissing Mason is like Christmas morning, or the morning of your birthday or the birthday of someone you love. Feeling Mason's arms is like feeling like nothing in the world can bring you down ‘cause you have someone protecting you from everything and ready to fight with you.

“Does he ask to hold your hand?” Mason whispered and then kissed you again, and you couldn't respond because you were busy feeling the wonderful taste of his lips. “I bet he doesn't kiss you like I do.”

Mason held you with both hands on your neck, and then he brought his hand to the back of your neck and grabbed your hair, making you pull your mouth away from his and look at him.

Why did he have to be so handsome?

And that stupid blond hair, that made you want to take his clothes off completely.

The look on your face was probably desperate with desire ‘cause Mason smiled and ran his tongue over his lips, staring at your mouth.

“No” you confessed, feeling Mason smile. “You're the only one who knows how to touch me and how to love me.”

Mason smiled when you responded and pulled your mouth against his once more, wrapping his arm around your neck and holding you against him. It was okay, you didn't want to be anywhere else but in his arms.

Mason pushed you against the wall and you gasped ‘cause his body against yours gave you protection. How did you manage to go so many months without him? You only knew one home, and that was next to Mason.

You'll never be able to live in Australia alone again.

✦‎۟ ࣭ ⊹

“Are you ready for a wedding?” Mason asked as he kissed your skin, and he whispered it because of the blue panties you were wearing. You weren't discreet when you left the wedding together and you heard your friends cheering when they saw you get into Mason's car, and you hadn't been able to stop smiling for hours, ever since he kissed you for the first time. “Something blue…”

You sighed as Mason showered you with kisses, you were numb with his body on top of yours. You didn't know how much you had missed this, these moments with Mason where you completed each other like soulmates, because only he knew how to drive you crazy.

“There is still something borrowed and something old missing” you said, closing your eyes and bringing your hands to Mason's hair. His breath was on your groin and you almost moaned, because you were tired but you needed Mason so much that you felt like you were going to explode. “But we can think about it.”

“I don't want you to think about anything but me right now, love.”

✦‎۟ ࣭ ⊹

It's been a month since you got back to Australia and you and Mason have been trying to keep things at arm's length, but it's really hard because when you're waking up, Mason's going to sleep or when you're working, Mason's waking up.

But ever since you set foot in England again, you knew that this was where you belonged, and when you returned to Australia, you didn't think twice when you asked for a transfer again.

Your boss agreed and said that you could get the same position in England, but you would have to wait a few weeks for all the paperwork to be ready. No one knew you were coming back because it would be a surprise to both Mason and his mom or his friends.

And at that moment you were at Manchester airport ‘cause the first place you were going was home. Mason. You don't even know if he's at home, if he's training, he might even be with someone else there and you feel like you might faint when you think about it.

It's already getting dark and cold, but you’re at an Uber with the only two suitcases of stuff you'd taken to Australia with you. The car dropped you off in front of Mason's house and if you weren't so nervous you would roll your eyes at the size of the place.

You rang the bell at the gate and after a few rings you heard a bark and raised your eyebrows, because you didn't know Mason had a dog.

“Hello?” His voice was hoarse and you almost cried, you were missing him so much it was making you sick.

“Hi, were you the one who asked for a girlfriend?” you were smiling and everything was silent for a few seconds until you saw the door to the house open quickly. Mason ran barefoot on the wet grass and you couldn't stop the tears from falling down your face.

“What the fuck? Are you insane?” Mason pulled you against him, lifting you off the ground as you jumped against him and wrapping your legs around his hips. “I thought you were in Australia, my god I missed you so much. I love you, I love you” Mason whispered and squeezed you, without letting you go.

“I love you, I'll never leave, never again” you cried as you hugged him, trying to hold onto Mason everywhere so he would never let you go again. “You are my home Mason, I'm sorry for everything, I know I don't deserve it but I just want to be with you forever.”

“I can't believe you're back, I'm dreaming” Mason finally let go of you and put you on the ground, then he pulled you in and kissed you after more than a month away from your lips. “You're still going to kill me by doing these things to me.”

Mason pulled your bags and pointed to the entrance of the house, and you walked as he pulled your things. You stopped when a puppy ran out of the house towards you, and you bent down to pet it.

“Oh my God, we already have a child?” you joked and Mason just smiled and crouched down to be close to you. The puppy jumped on your legs and then ran to Mason, who petted his fur.

“This is Ace, he’s a boy and he has been my new company since you left me alone.”

“Ahh, poor boy, he had to put up with you crying for long weeks.”

“His mommy is home now” you stood up and looked at Mason, kissing him once more.

“My home is wherever you are.”

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changetyre · 2 days

Text

Make a wish

SUMMARY: It's Ivy's 2nd Birthday and her birthday wish is a little bigger than you'd expected. Part of Verstappen Family Verse

WARNINGS: None?

A/N: Requested over on wattpad ;)

"Oh no Max the party hats, I forgot to get party hats." Your heart sunk to your stomach.

"No, I bought some." Max calmed you down.

Today was Ivy's 2nd birthday and she had been so insistent about celebrating her birthday at a race with her Papa and Uncles despite you telling her she could have a big birthday party at home with her friends. Ivy almost cried when you suggested something else wanting nothing more but to be at the "waces!" for her birthday.

Despite this, you still wanted her birthday to have somewhat of a little celebration so you'd spent days making and decorating cupcakes to take to the paddock and buying some decorations for Ivy.

You'd wanted everything to be a surprise so you'd mostly work at night so that the girls didn't see you because you also knew that if Lea saw anything she would definitely say something since she was as good at keeping secrets as her uncle Lando.

But Max could tell how stressed and tired you'd grown with trying to get everything perfect for her and he was glad it was finally the day so you could relax a little. You'd woken up earlier to get the stuff in the car so that Brad could drive it to the track before you arrived with Max, Ivy, and Lea.

"Okay, I'll go now." Brad got in the car to drive off.

"Wait no did I bring down the streamers?" You asked.

"Yes," Max answered waving Brad away.

"Wait what about the-"

"Schatje, everything's there." Max cupped your face to get you to look at him.

"But what if-"

"If it's not she won't even notice darling, it'll be perfect because we'll be there." Max kissed you not letting you argue further. He could feel you relax in his arms.

"I'm sorry, I just want everything to be perfect." You hugged your husband tightly.

"You'll never reach perfection baby, trust me I've tried" Max kissed your head. "But you're close enough and Ivy's gonna love whatever we do for her."

__________

"PAPA WOOK!" Ivy yelled excitedly as she ran out of her room.

Max turned to see his daughter in a big puffy Belle dress which she had begged him to buy for her birthday.

"Oh my god is that Belle?" Max gasped dramatically.

You stood by the door watching the interaction with loving eyes.

"No Papa is me Iby!" Ivy ran up to her dad who lifted her up and twirled her around.

"How's my gorgeous birthday girl?" Max kissed her cheeks.

"Papa I tuwn two." Ivy held up her tiny hand trying to hold up 2 fingers but her third finger kept slipping out of the grasp of her little thumb and pinky finger.

"Yes, you do and you need to stop growing." Max hugged her closer sighing at the idea of his girls growing up.

A few seconds later Lea peaked her head around the corner of her room. "Mamma?" She called your name.

"You ready baby?" You asked your daughter whom you'd also bought a dress for since you wanted to make sure she didn't feel left out.

She nodded shyly, she'd started growing shy around you and her dad lately whenever she showed you something which you found adorable.

She walked out wearing her Belle dress too except hers was the blue town dress and you'd helped her put a blue bow on her hair.

"What a gorgeous princess!" Max also sighed dramatically while holding Ivy who clapped in his arms happily.

You had breakfast quickly, the girls and you having pancakes as a treat for Ivy's birthday while Max had to eat something else to keep his weight down for getting in the car later.

You strapped everyone into the car and off you went to the race track.

________

As soon as you arrived there were cameras everywhere but by now the girls were used to it especially Lea who liked to pose for the cameras despite Max and you telling her to keep her head low.

"Mama Wando?" Lea pointed down to the McLaren hospitality as you approached the Redbull hospitality.

"Maybe we'll see him later Ivy he's not here yet." You lied and heard her sigh sadly as she rested her head on your shoulder.

You'd arrived at the track pretty early since Max didn't have to be on the track until around 4 today but as a surprise for Ivy's birthday, You and Max had asked the boys if they could arrive early to surprise Ivy for her birthday knowing she would just want to spend the day with her favorite people.

You walked into the Redbull hospitality and Brad, Vicky, and other staff members were there ready just like planned.

"Ivy look!" Max called out to his daughter who lifted her head from your shoulder to look towards her dead.

"SURPRISE!" They called out as party poppers went off and confetti flew everywhere Ivy's eyes and mouth were wide open as she looked around the decorated room.

She squealed in your arms squirming for you to put her down and as soon as you did she went running to where there were presents and a huge cake with a small fondant F1 car where Ivy was the driver wearing a tiara.

"PAPA LOOK!" Ivy called out to her dad pointing at the top of the cake.

"Wow, Ivy." Max gasped surprised as if he hadn't specifically asked for her cake.

You looked around to look for Lea just to find her munching away at the snacks that were laid out across the snack table despite eating breakfast not long ago. Just as you turned again you noticed Lando, Dani, Carlos, and Charles at the door, Ivy too distracted looking at her cake with her dad to notice.

"Come in." You waved the drivers over. Max had previously discussed all of this with Christian and he'd gladly accepted having the drivers over at the hospitality for a few hours for the celebration.

"MY BABY!" Lando yelled as soon as he was inside.

Ivy's head snapped immediately in the direction of her favorite person. "WANDOOOO!" She yelped as she ran as fast as her little feet could carry her towards her godfather.

Lea hearing the commotion turned around and also ran towards her godfather, Daniel scooping her up in her arms happily.

It didn't take long for the rest of the drivers to pile in and Ivy excitedly greeted everyone although always kept coming back to Lando's arms.

Although you'd insisted they didn't have to bring anything you weren't surprised to see the gift table had doubled in numbers at all the gifts the drivers had bought only hoping they hadn't spent ridiculous amounts of money on a 2-year-old.

"Happy Birthday dear Ivy! Happy Birthday to you!" Everyone finished singing as Max held Lea in his arms, you holding Lea in yours as you stood behind the birthday cake. Antoine, Louis, and Joris moved across taking pictures and videos of your family per their own request as you'd told them they didn't need to take any pictures and you'd be happy with simply their presence but they insisted.

"Make a wish princess." Max lowered Ivy so she could blow at her candles.

"I wish for a widdle broder!" Ivy yelled out unashamedly blowing out her candles afterwards.

You and Max looked at each other in shock as everyone around you burst out laughing. "Uh, you're meant to say your wish in your head baby," Max told his daughter not really sure how to proceed.

"hmm." She shrugged unbothered as she squirmed for Max to put her down. "Wando Cake!" She called out to her godfather who gladly came over to help Ivy start cutting the cake (horribly).

After everyone got a piece and Lea sat sharing her piece with Lando on his lap you all sat and relaxed for a while, Max by your side as Lea played around with Joris and Charles whom she still had an obsession with.

Max turned to you blinking hard three times, his little I love you gesture. "So what do you think about Ivy's wish huh?" Max asked you.

You laughed at the thought. Max laughing with you. "If it's with you I want it all." You told him lovingly.

"In another year?" Max dragged your chair closer to him so there was barely a gap between the both of you.

"Sounds good to me." You smiled before Max kissed you lovingly.

#f1 x reader #changetyre #f1 #f1 imagine #f1 one shot #f1fic #formula 1 #f1fluff #max verstappen x reader #Dad!Max Verstappen #Verstappen x reader #lando norris

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hyunjinsjeans · 8 hours

Text

Winter Madness (Han x Reader)

Summary: trying to take things slow with Chan after a certain conversation turns into a weekend getaway to remember.

Type: Fluff 🧸, SFW 👍

Warnings: Mentions of pregnancy, mentions of health issues.

Word count: 1992 Words

Related: He Knows (Han ver.)

Masterlist Here

AN: This fic is a part 2 to Han’s version of the He Knows Series. It can also be read as a stand alone. This one is not as horny as Bangchan’s version hehe, I wanted more Hannie fluff, so here we are! Enjoy!

You did not struggle to get pregnant, after all the worrying Jisung did for you, it turned out to be a simple task. As simple as simply having unprotected sex a few times. Jisung had been incredibly overprotective from the moment you came home with the lab results. You were supposed to wait until your doctor’s appointment, but the two of you just had to take a little look at the papers in the envelope.

There was one single line that indicated “pregnancy” and after the long line of dots the next word would either be “negative” or “positive”, in black bold ink your result was “positive”. Han was worried sick, those first few months he would lose sleep over your aches and symptoms.

You went through nothing special, but to Han it was all his fault. He would sometimes let his anxiety take the wheel. Fortunately, there was a big tour to get through while their baby grew healthy in your belly. You did not stop working until your stomach was so big you could not sit comfortably at your desk, by which point you were almost at full term.

You were excited to tag along with Han and some of the boys on a short weekend to Busan, I.N was excited to have everyone with him in his hometown as his girlfriend tagged along too for the first time. You did not think much about it, packing and leaving thinking how you were programmed for a c-section in three weeks time.

Of course, things never go quite as planned. You were taking a walk down the cold streets of Busan with Felix and his girlfriend while Han got bullied by Seungmin ahead of you when you felt something cool and wet on your leg. You stopped with a frown and looked down, the couple besides you took notice and Felix!Reader passed her little girl to Felix as she turned to you and asked if you needed to use the bathroom. You shook your head and then tried to look down, asking her why she was asking.

“Y/N… there’s a poodle… are you okay? Did your water break?!”

And that was the moment the penny dropped, right as I.N and his girlfriend reached you, you touched your stomach and nodded.

There was a little bit of chaos after that. From the youngest in the group figuring out where the nearest hospital was in order to take you, to Han frantically trying to reach your obgyn on the phone. You were happy to at least have the girls with you, Innie’s girlfriend was a nurse and knew a thing or two, she helped quite a bit keeping you comfortable while Felix!Reader tried to remember all the breathing exercises from when she gave birth. Felix and Seungmin entertained themselves by keeping Felix’s girls occupied.

You were not expecting all the planning you had spent months working on, to be useless.

You ended up giving birth naturally in a hospital in Busan while on a weekend getaway. Han was beyond anxious at the prospect of something going wrong because you did not know the doctors here. He had to trust everything would be okay and in the end it was. Han held your hand the entire time, speaking words of encouragement and kissing your sweaty forehead whenever you looked too tired to go on. He kept his nerves to himself the best you had ever seen him do, sitting strong next to you, being the support you needed and more. At around 9:00 p.m. you had a beautiful baby girl. Born only a few days before Christmas, your baby was small and healthy, crying loudly the second she came out. You cried along with Han, his eyes comically wide as the doctor announced it was a girl. Both of you were expecting a boy, but it was in the air as your baby just did not cooperate during scans.

“It’s a girl!” He kissed the back of your hand, “we have a girl!”

You laughed with your eyes closed and your head lying against the pillow, too tired to react any other way. “Is she okay?”

Han was able to cut the umbilical cord and took a glance at his daughter in the safe hands of one of the nurses.

“Babe,” he brushed your hair back, “you did great, our baby is perfect.”

While the doctor and nurses got your baby clean one of the nurses asked if you had decided on a name for her, so they could put it on the bracelets. You looked up at Han, both of you lost for words, you had decided on a boy name. It felt like suddenly all the planning really was for nothing. Having to do a complete 180, you offered your husband a smile.

“My nana’s name was Hae-rin. I feel it might suit her.”

Han’s eyes scan your face as he remembers your Nana, who passed a few months prior. She was a funny woman, it certainly felt empty going to your parent’s house after her passing. She was a bright lively woman, she could never stay still. Han could see what you meant. He nodded.

“Haerin,” he kissed your knuckles. “That’s her name”.

The nurse nodded and carefully wrote the name on the two bracelets, placing one around your wrist and then wrapping the other one around your babygirl’s tiny wrist too. After that, you were able to hold her. An exhausted smile on your face as you were handed the most delicate little thing in the world. You watched Han standing next to you, his hand coming to cup your daughter’s head as you held her into your chest. The two of you cried happily, finally meeting the little girl you spent the last year waiting for.

Haerin was a beautiful little girl, she met her first two friends the following morning when the guys came to see her. Felix’s girls both entranced as they watched the baby sleep. You giggled as the girls ooh’ed at her in your arms. Felix!Reader held her eldest as she pointed out Haerin’s cute little nose, Felix kept his youngest’s hands at bay as she tried to touch the newborn baby girl.

You were able to take her home a couple days later, Han had to stay at a hotel while the rest of the boys went back to Seoul to work. You spent that first week in the hotel in Busan, making the most of the surprise arrival of your little one. She was an angel, she cried little, although whenever she did it was loud. You and Han spent almost two hours in the bathroom with her the first time you gave her a bath. First struggle was getting her out of her onesie as she felt so fragile and delicate. The second struggle was being able to support Haerin’s head while bathing her. Han helped hold her, his hands seemed so big then that you two giggled at the sight. He was happy to pick her up out of the bathtub and wrap her in a soft towel, drenching the front of his shirt in the process.

Luckily, you were back in Seoul after that one week. Entering your home again, this time as a family of three. Han grunted as he spotted your “birth bag” on the entryway.

“We could have used that last week…” He pointed out as you entered behind him with Haerin in her brand new baby carrier.

“I even got special pj’s for the hospital, socks, flip flops and a little blanket for her!” You pause, chuckling “well, it was blue, I thought we were having a boy!”

Han laughs, now looking at you with furrowed brows but a smile on his face. “Her entire room is for a boy…”

You cover your face with your hand and smile, you walk into the home with your sleeping baby. “I hope she likes blue and bears…”

You bring her into her room, setting the baby carrier down and pulling her out of it carefully. Han watches you as you pull her into your chest. He sighs, looking at the pastel pink bundle in your arms. The nursery was all baby blue and grey. Her crib was adorned with a white blanket and a couple of teddy bears, a single HanQuokka in the corner.

“It’s okay, we can redo the room when she is a little bigger,” you said, knowing well that having your baby born so close to christmas was going to mean the two of you were going to be busy.

Han was a top notch dad from day one, arriving home he was nothing less than a sweetheart to both you and your baby. He woke up in the middle of the night to change her diapers, helping you feed her and calm her down when she simply couldn’t sleep. He went to work but kept checking on you two; sending you messages or calling to ask if everything was okay. You could confidently say that Han was a wonderful dad.

He also made an effort to talk to you, to ask about how you felt and open up about his worries. Whether he had work things or personal things in his mind, he told you about them at night when you got ready for bed, and he held you close whenever you needed a little cheering up.

The one thing that you found the hardest about having a baby was the sudden rush of hormones that seemed to assault you that first month after giving birth. You loved your baby so much, you missed having her be a part of you… she felt so foreign in your arms, you felt like it was not right and you struggled with the anxiety of being unable to change it. Han helped you, listened and supported you; making sure you knew it was okay and it would be okay. He held her every chance he got, going as far as sitting quietly in the living room just holding her to spend time with her. And seeing this helped soothe your nerves a lot, it made your brain reason how important it was she was her own person.

On Christmas you had Han’s parents visit, they met her and filled her with gifts and love. You saw the excitement in his mother’s face when she got to hold her for the first time. Haerin was already growing so much in just two weeks… Considering she was born a little early, she was doing fine. Growing and growing, eating well and beginning to take in her surroundings, showing how comfortable she was in Han’s and your own arms, quickly becoming picky about who got to hold her, she absolutely hated being in Han’s dad’s arms, and at best she tolerated his mom’s.

“Oh, she just likes to be in her dad’s arms,” his mother commented once Haerin started crying and Han picked her up, holding her in his arms and calming her down.

“Mom…” he tilted his head, “she probably just needs to get comfortable with you.”

“No, no… babies know their parents,” his mother waved him off, “it’s natural. It’s okay, Jisung.”

“Don’t let him fool you,” you told your in-laws. “He spends most of his free time with her, he has basically turned himself into her bed.”

Han smiles sheepishly and his ears burn pink. “Well, she’s my baby! Of course I’ll hold her all I can!” He cradles her head softly, “she’s so small too… my baby girl…”

You could tell that with a dad like Han, your little Haerin would be loved and cared for, she was going to live a good life being spoiled by her parents. She was going to be a daddy’s girl for sure as Han was already wrapped around her little finger.

———

Comments, likes and reblogs are appreciated! Thank you for reading!

#stray kids x reader #han jisung fanfic #han jisung x reader #han jisung fluff #han jisung x female reader #han jisung x y/n #han jisung x you #hyunjinsjeans writing

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dakotalun · 17 hours

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What Now? | Eddie Munson

pairing: Eddie Munson X Fem Reader

summary: You just got broken up with and you can only think of one place to go.

warnings: none, just some fluffy Eddie moments :)

word count: 1k

a/n: Shit it's been a while. Anyways back to it!

*******NOT MY GIF, CREDIT TO OWNERS*******

Everything was going okay recently, not many nightmares and the ones I did have weren’t too bad. Until…

“What?” The confusion is evident on my face and in my voice.

“I just don’t think we’ll work out. I’m sorry,” Jamie’s head is down and their eyes are looking everywhere but at me.

“What did I do?”

“Nothing! Nothing at all, it’s me.”

I scoff, “Pfft. Okay sure,” I roll my eyes at their words, “Like every other time people say that line.”

“I’m being serious, love. I love you, I really do but there’s shit that I need to figure out-”

“Then we figure it out together! That’s what it means to be in a committed relationship!”

“I just- I feel like having a partner right now is not helping,” Their voice is distant and soft now.

“I get it. I’m too much, too clingy, too needy, too…everything,” The words sting my throat and tongue as they leave but it’s the truth, it’s what they all mean when they break it off with me.

“Not at all! You’re perfect, in every way, shape, and form. Seriously, it's me. I’m going through shit that I feel like would break us if I kept lying about it to you.”

“So this has been going on for a while?” I see their face change for a second then go back to sadness.

“Yeah, it has. But I thought it was nothing-”

“How long?”

“What?” Now it’s their turn to be confused.

“How long have you known and been going through this?” My face is steel and I show no emotion.

“Since Lolla.”

Lollapalooza was in August, it’s November. They’ve known this and not said anything for 3 months! Lying to me about everything for so long and I had no idea. I don’t even know how to feel right now. I begin to grab my bag and stuff my shit in it before getting up off their bed.

"Y/N," They reach for my hand to stop me from leaving.

I pull away before they can touch me, "Don't. I- I need space," I leave their room and head for the front door, looking back at the fuzzy orange cat lying on the back of the chair as he always does for the last time.

"Bye Cheerio," I twist the knob and walk out of the apartment I had felt so welcome in before.

I can hear the thunder once in the elevator, realizing that I can't return home because I promised Robin the apartment, assuming I'd be with Jamie all night. I try to think of who else I could stay with tonight.

Chrissy maybe? No, she’s at Jason’s place for the weekend. Oh, Nancy should be free right? I reach for my phone to text Nancy but see a Google Calendar notification on the screen.

Nancy Double Date with Johnathan and Roomie! Damn, I guess she’s out too. Maybe Robin would understand me coming home tonight, if I told them what happened?

As I think about what to do and where to go, rain starts to pour down, soaking through the loose shirt I had put on.

Why does this keep happening to me? How do I always end up in the rain with no place to go? I think back to last summer when Kris, Sophia, and I got into it and my brother’s friend had to come rescue me from myself and the rain. I laugh at the thought that this is just going to be my normal from now on.

As I walk, my feet autonomously begin to head to the only other person whom I trust and who might be able to help. I don’t even realize where I’m going until I’m standing in front of the building, not under the protection of the awning even though it’s only 3 feet in front of me.

I take a deep breath before stepping forward and deciding this really is the only option I have left. I’m thankful for the covering once I’m actually under it. I dial apartment 203 and wait for the voice of my best friend to spread through the old speaker.

"Hello?" His voice is low and gravelly; he must have just woken up.

"Eddie, It’s Y/N. Can I come up? I-" I sniffle and before I can continue I hear the lock moving and the door unlock so I can enter. I didn’t even realize I had been crying until then.

I quickly open the door and make my way through the small maze to get to his place on the second floor. I can feel my wet socks and the weight of my bag has risen tremendously since I left Jamie’s. I'm gonna need to check and make sure my computer is okay once I get inside his place.

Soon I reach his door and he's standing there against the frame, in a tshirt and sweats, his signature look. The expression on his face is one of concern and fear. Something I’m all too familiar with.

"Hey," My voice is weak and not at all how he normally hears it. I’ve never cried in front of him and we’ve been friends for over a year now, strange.

"Shit, Y/N you're soaked! Get the fuck in here," He moves out the way and closes the door behind me as I walk into his living room, making sure to take off my shoes before going onto the carpet.

He comes back with a towel and wraps it around me after taking my bag and setting it at my feet. I mumble a thank you before taking a seat at the edge of his couch, completely on the other side from where he normally sits.

To my surprise he sits next to me and rubs my back, comforting me and drying me at the same time. We sit there in silence for a few minutes. I'm tired and not in the mood to fully explain what happened yet, so neither of us speak until I realize I should probably tell him why I came to his place so late and without warning.

Taglist: @ali-r3n @dixontardis @witchwolflea @micheledawn1975 @daydreaming-mood @idfwfeelings @adaydreamaway08 @preciousbumplingbee @rustboxstarr @plk-18 @teary-eyed-egg @needylilgal022 @exploding-bonbon @gagasbee @eddiemunsonsguitarpic @aol19 @thatwitchyoucouldntburn @meanlilbean @sonnyahngel @corrodedcass @pigwidgeonxo @marsmunson86 @lottie-90 @figmentofquinn @sareim123122 @eddies-puppet @gvf23 @kennedy-brooke @rocklees-wife @emma77645 @cherris-n-peaches @breehumbles @joequinn-love @anyoddthoughts @aysheashea @eddiesskittle @uncxmfxrtablex @cherrymedicine13 @mrsjellymunson @shotgunhallelujah @bambipowerblueaddition @hexqueensupreme @josephquinnsfreckles @harrysgothicbitch @paleidiot @smurfflynn @lilyungpeanut @selena-rocker27

#eddie stranger things #munson #eddie munson #eddie my love #eddie my beloved #female reader #oneshot #smut #eddie munson smut #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson fic #eddie munson x you #stranger things #stranger things 4 #st4 #stranger things season 4 #eddie x reader

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tossawary · 2 days

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I read "Star Wars Jedi: The Dark Side", which is the 5-part comic depicting Qui-Gon Jinn and Xanatos's breakup as a Master-Padawan pair, and the art was... fine? It wasn't good. Every time they drew the female Jedi Master Tahl in an overly sexualized pose like she didn't have any internal organs, I wanted to bite someone, but they did some kind of neat things with color / lighting sometimes? Eh. It was competent enough. It worked.

I didn't really like their composition or posing most of the time, because the camera kept swinging around 180 degrees a lot, trucking in and out, which made it hard to keep track of who was where sometimes. Especially when the character design wasn't... uh... great at differentiating between the characters sometimes? I didn't really like any of the character designs in this comic. They could have been way more distinct. It took me a "wait a fucking second" to realize that Qui-Gon was sparring against both Xanatos and Feemor at the start, because the boys looked so, SO similar, with mostly just a palette swap between them. The character faces could also shift a lot from page to page, issue to issue.

Given how Qui-Gon Jinn looks here, if you had taken this character design for Xanatos and told me it was supposed to be Obi-Wan Kenobi, I would have 100% believed you.

Which is disappointing? Xanatos looks way, WAY too much like Obi-Wan or Anakin for me. He's like a fusion. And this is a really boring character design compared to some of the other Jedi character designs in "The Clone Wars". It's also hilarious, because I was browsing some books and honestly thinking to myself just last night: "They have GOT to stop making skinny, white brunette girl protagonists in Star Wars, if only because I can't easily tell them all apart with the way they get drawn most of the time."

What I was ABSOLUTELY NOT expecting: Xanatos's dad looks like a buff Lex Luthor and Xanatos's sister, Nason, looks like SPACE OPERA PRINCESS BARBIE. It cracked me up a little. Look!

So, uh, look, I know that the Telosians characters in the background there are functionally wearing Jedi robes themselves in non-brown colors, but I think that's incredibly boring design again. So, I'm going to imagine that Nason's dressy outfit and hairstyle here is closer to what your average Telosian noble would wear. (Xanatos and Nason's hair colors here could both be natural, but maybe it's fashionable to dye it?) Now that Xanatos has left the Jedi, he's going to need a new fit! A new wardrobe! He can grow his hair out!

I presume that Xanatos is going to be wearing the villainous black robes later on in the "Jedi Apprentice" series, of course! It's classic like the little black dress! But I am nevertheless now not going to be able to shake the image of young Obi-Wan Kenobi being tormented by a Dark Jedi Xanatos, evil overlord of the Offworld Mining corporation, who looks and dresses like Space Opera Princess Barbie. Revenge can be achieved in hot pink.

#tossawary star wars #spoilers #xanatos star wars #nason star wars #qui gon jinn #you can do evil in hot pink; there's no reason 'pink is for girls' should exist in the Star Wars setting #jedi master tahl

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peachjagiya · 3 days

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I hope you don’t take offense to what I am about to say cuz i’ll speak freely. I think the issue here is, so many taekookers kept talking about how much Jungkook didn’t want to do the show and even went as far as claiming that he was forced to do this show no matter how much Jungkook verbally proclaimed how much fun he was having and how he loved the show. Let’s also be serious here, does anyone really believe that Jungkook would have continued shooting in other locations if he hated the first experience in NY? Before someone comes up with the contract excuse, I need to remind everyone that this show was never the company’s idea. It was Jimin who thought of it, told Jungkook about it and then pushed at the level of the company to make it happen. I had never gotten chance to watch ITS friendcation with Tae because honestly I am more a music fan and their variety shows or other healing shows kinda bore me but I recently watched Friendcation and it was Tae too who wanted to film the show with his wooga squad and from what I understood from what they said at the beginning, he was the one who took the idea to the company and they let it happen. So I don’t think it’s fair to claim that Jungkook couldn’t back out of the show even if he didn’t like it because he was contractually bound.

Right now if I were jikookers I would gloat too because so many people have claimed that Jk looked miserable, looked disinterested, didn’t want to do the show at all or didn’t see the point but from his own words we know that is far from the truth. Not only did he declare how much he loved the show and how free he felt during the show, he also thinks that out of all the trips he been on in his life, these trips for AYS were the best. He also mentioned wanting to go back to the start of their trip so anyone still claiming that Jungkook didn’t love being on that show is not being realistic or reasonable at all. He could have just not said anything if he didn’t feel that way because ofcourse he couldn’t say he didn’t enjoy the trip if he didn’t (or maybe he could) so knowing how blunt Jk can be if he said he loved it, then he loved it. So I think it is wise to just stop with all the stuff about him not liking it or not not wanting to be there because nothing we have seen and heard from him supports that line of thought. He clearly looked bummed that the trip was ending, him and Jimin, and someone wouldn’t feel that way if they didn’t enjoy the trip. I feel like those trips to him, were an opportunity for him to break away from his excessive work load for a few days and just unwind, have fun and eat to his hearts delights. In hindsight, I think it was a great Idea that the show was there to film as after watching his documentary and seeing just how much he worked and pushed himself, I think those few days inbetween schedules to just have fun did him some good.

This is just me stating my honest opinion and I hope I didn’t say anything condescending or rude.

Honest opinions are fine and you're welcome to them.

The only thing I want to query is that jimkookers should gloat. What is this victim storyline? Oh well they're only gloating cos we were so mean to them?

They spent a couple of weeks saying JK visibly hated Tae, laughing at misinterpreted jokes to make it look like JK wanted him gone, mocking their short lay down. Did they all bow at our feet when he finally said it was better with Tae? No they absolutely did not. What they did was just carry on. Cos they perceived events a different way. And I couldn't give a fuck if they do that.... until they get pissy when others do it.

I have never, in my life, been to a JMKK space to "gloat." Or to say anything actually. I've often wondered about their thoughts on things and I just haven't ever. It's not my space.

Imagine if the tumblr Taekookers reacted to, for example, Hawaii this way. Ran into Jikook spaces to "gloat". Because as you say here, we had plenty of reason to. After months and years of "JK can't stand being around him" and "Tae just lies" that became too much even in the short time I've been around, there was vindication. Yeah, we could have gloated.

I bet if we'd done that, the first thing the jmkkrs would say would be "why hasn't this made you feel good?"

What actually happened is we just had a couple of exciting days being dorks about it, feeling good and happy in our "community" here.

So they should go do that.

#my asks

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theoneandonlysemla · 3 days

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WIP Wednesday

Tagged by @thequeenofthewinter and @skyrim-forever

Tagging: @ladytanithia @ladytanithia @tiredela @dirty-bosmer and anyone else, I'm tired and can't really think.

So, I'm back from my vacation in Denmark with renewed loathing for my work ( @did3lphis knows what I'm talking about). I'm so awfully tired, could do nothing but sleep and can't find any motivation to write on my chapter or anything else. Also, vibes are off.

Totally unrelated: Does anyone have recommendations for music to write an assassination scene (like witnessing one) to?

Anyway, I did fabricate something in Denmark and have a longer part (because we need context) for you to read. Little info on that: Morotar has arrived at an Inn in Shore's Stone (that I totally made up) and is glad to get a bed after over a week of camping. The inkeeper is not that glad to have a Thalmor in his tavern. Anyway, great chance for Morotar to show that he is, in fact, an ass:

This taproom too was deserted, not a sign of guest or even the innkeeper. A bar stood on the gable end of the dwelling, so he crossed the room, spying into the darkness and strained his ears for any possible sounds. Nothing, only a child’s doll, lay in a corner. Reaching the counter, he peeked around the corner. Light filtered through the gap in an ajar door, a sign of life.

“Hello?” he spoke into the silence, hearing nothing in return.

His hands rested on the countertop, the fingers of his right drumming with impatience. Unconsciously, he lowered his eyebrows and wrinkled his mouth. He wanted nothing more than a warm bed and having to wait now was driving him mad. “Someone there?” His voice echoed in the emptiness of the taproom. A chair scratched over the floorboards; steps sounded. The light strip between door and frame disappeared for a brief moment, then the door swung open. A man stepped out, his hair thinning and his nose the form of a misshaped potato. As his view found his new customer, he stopped and eyed the Altmer before him, eyes narrowed in animosity. “We don’t serve vermin like you here,” he uttered hoarse, mucus stuck in his throat. Morotar closed his eyes and inhaled a deep breath. Was he going to have to have the same discussion in the east of Skyrim every time he wanted to rent a room? Long ago he had given up trying to reason with the tavern owners and explain his situation to them. Only clear words were of any use with those kinds of people. Instead of reacting to the man’s offence, he pulled up a barstool and sat down. From under his hood, he glanced at the man. It was difficult to put a finger on, but he may be Imperial of origin. Too short for a Nord, the tone of his skin a touch to much of an olive undertone. “I’d like an ale, if you don’t mind,” he said, his voice bordering on monotony but still housing a friendly undertone. “Piss of to Riften and see if the thieves will give you any,” the man spat, still standing in the frame of the door. “Careful,” he warned him, turning his head to stare directly in his eyes. “How’s the wife? The girl?” All colour left the man’s face and he became as pale as a ghost, staring aghast at the Altmer. It had been easy to make that guess; the doll was a clear indication. But that, the man did not know, and he now thought Morotar knew things about him. That the Thalmor knew about him and his family. “Good,” he breathed and finally got going. He rummaged under the bar, pulled out a bottle of ale and placed it in front of Morotar. As he did so, he kept his distance, his hand trembling. “My, thank you!” He flicked the cork out of the bottle and took a sip. Bitterness and the flavour of hops caressed his palate and he looked at the bottle with satisfaction. “Anything to add?” he continued, piercing the Imperial with his glare.

#tesblr #the elder scrolls #elder scrolls #fanfiction #ao3 writer #skyrim fanfiction #ao3 #dealings with daedra #wip wednesday's #current wip

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ra-vio · 5 months

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semester is almost over. im dying

#my oc #rune #mori #i have a project due tomorrow and its finally scared me back into drawing #even though i should be working on this project but im SO SO SO TIRED #i went on an outing like 2 weeks ago the same week that i walked everywhere cause i was desperately #trying to get my taxes done but thats a different story but the point is i was walking a lot and i went on an outing where i stood all day #and then i had to go to class the very next day thinking i was fine but i wasnt.#and that same day after i walked across the city because i absolutely had to pick a thing up. i think the same week i met up with my mom #a couple of times but i was walking the whole way there. my point is that for 2 weeks straight i have been rigorously walking everywhere #and on my feet all the time with little breaks in between and my feet fucking hurt man #i need this semester to be OVER i need to sleep for a MONTH #but i cant because i have to scrape together SOME of this project and finals are next week #this class this project is for fucking sucks. all semester ive been teetering the line between pass and fail #and its not even my fucking fault. im so burnt out so i dont want to do this project. but i might fail if i dont #i need to at least demo it but i have like. one thing done and i dunno what to tell my TA about i #how do i tell my TA and prof that everything is too much for me so i absolutely could work on this project #my laptop is broken so im afraid to use it. the server kept going down last month so i was afraid to use that #so many stupid little things keep piling up and i'd sound really weird trying to explain why i cant do my work #because my desk is on the floor and it makes me really sad so no i cant do my hw. my fave candy has red40 in it so i had to stop eating it #but now i cant do my work because i was using it to help me focus on my hw. LIFE SUCKS BRO #anyway whatever happens. i cant wait to play video games again

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nandermoenthusiast · 6 months

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oh my god i got so emotional SHUT UUUUUP

#911 #911verse #evan buckley #so this is what crying about a character is actually like #like i do be crying at times dont get me wrong #but i just love buck so much. i kept stopping the episode and going. omg omg omg #omg its happening. omg idk if i can actually watch this. omg its happening !!!!!!!!!!!#jesus christ JESUS CHRIST #like i know we throw the word around a lot but this is MY SON #and everything that happened in the episode. it was like it was happening to me #i felt actual physical damage and actual butterflies as the kiss moment approached #like theY DID THAT #THEY MADE MY BI SON CANONICALLY BI #idk to have this shift in a characters perception this late in a procedural….. 911 you gods #i really hope they can somehow make more seasons cause they would deserve ti #it. and like. this doesn’t have to be the end of buddie??#they could get them together at any time bc buck realizing hes into men is a lot other worm can than buck realizing hes in love with #his best friend. i just dont know how they would do it with eddie bc they would have to pull a lot of focus over there too with a big #chance of feeling repetitive with their narratives #maybe they just show them together after a timejump and say they worked some stuff out idk lmao #ANYWAY I AM STILL CRYING BECAUSE BUCK MY SON IS A CANONICAL BISEXUAL JEALOUS DISASTER JUST LIKE HIS MAMA ❤️#THIS IS WHAT REPRESENTATION IS ACTUALLY ALL ABOUT (and i mean his horrifying handling of the feelings of being left out of course lmao)#THE LOOK EDDIE SHOT HIM TOO #i am too frazzled rn i just need to scream i think #hi. im sorry this is me coming out of the 911 closet now that wwdits is on hiatus #evan buckley!!!!!#SON OF MY SONS #LIGHT OF MY LIFE #APPLE OF MY EYE

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cerealbishh · 2 months

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"Henry cares for Faran. The Liars normally have to be the ones caring for others. It just makes me melt!" - Zaria on Twitter about Henry(x)

#pretty little liars: original sin #pll: original sin #henry nelson #ben tyler cook #look i know people don't like him but ME do #i know he wasn't the best boyfriend in summer school but he was trying!!!#he does have an issue with boundaries/oversharing/nosiness but i feel like that's a fairly normal issue(he needs to work on it)#maybe i just like ben tyler cook...#i don't even post many gifsets for male characters yet here i am defending him #also could be because he gives me strong lucas beattie/lucas gottesman vibes and i remember really liking him with hanna(until some point)#him getting upset at her for being mean to kelly kinda reminded me of lucas with hanna about kate in the books iirc? but i'd need to reread #pllosedit #henrynelsonedit #bentylercookedit #bencookedit #i honestly would be happy to have him back next season as faran's friend but idk how likely that is tbh #just a dorky romantic sorta dude with a strong moral compass and a heart of gold :p #i would LOVE to know who they were gonna cast if they kept henry as asian-american #i think he also reminds me a little of holden? i also liked him too #pretty little liars: summer school #pll summer school #pllssedit #honestly wish they would stop straightening ben's hair i love his little waves/curls and the messiness... i mean gif 9? what a cutie #if ben himself ever talks about henry i will replace the quote #honestly henry probably gave faran issues by saying ''i love you'' but then wouldn't leave the c*lt for her...#but also she didn't say it back? she honestly didn't have to if she wasn't feeling it but idk maybe it hurt him and that's why he wouldn't?#if i'm being honest though FUCk that c*lt storyline... that was just for shock value and not even GOOD shock value #i truly believe he acts impulsively when he feels like someone will be hurt or is hurting #i wonder if he was working on illinoise and that's why he wasn't upped to a series regular?#sir don't join a c*lt... go to therapy!!! pls i BEg

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cuntwrap--supreme · 1 year

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Important life lesson I've learned recently: Never fall in love with an anarchist.

#leon bitches #I'm dying #yesterday i slept for three hours before the horror of what's happening kicked in and insomnia kept me from sleep #fucking went and ran like four miles just to drive the thoughts of him out of my brain #didn't work #but before that i had a complete mental breakdown like i haven't in so so long #like. unable to get off the floor. unable to stop hysterical crying. unable to stop shaking.#it was pretty bad #and it's no wonder i didn't sleep. how could i when the only thing I've hoped for for years - my only goal - is distancing himself from me?#and i know I'm making generalizations but anarchists all have shit going on in their heads dude #like. my take on anarchy (as an anarchist) is that everyone should be kind even when we don't beed to be #and we need to do shit to save the planet even if it's kinda extreme #radical kindness kinda route. but without some government entity forcing it. it's just how we should be.#but his type is very overthrow the government kill the politicians force the world to get better #and i agree with bits of that. mostly because it would be faster than waiting for people to wake up and choose kindness.#but he is legitimately about doing shit that can accelerate that change #one of the earliest conversations i had with him he was saying he voted for trump in the hopes he'd collapse the country #that way we can bring on the Mad Max Times which he said are step one for rebuilding a better world #and i think that might be when i fell in love with him #because here's this self-stated conservative hillbilly yet he's as much of a punk as i am #because - as much as i want change to happen without too much death - I've always said the mad max times will have to happen #and he used the exact term I've always used: Mad Max Times #and then we stood around and talked about the best ways to kill politicians and change the world #and he laughed at me for thinking humanity isn't too far gone to be nice #said even in the Star Trek universe there had to be violence before utopia #but i said expecting people to have any shred of decency left is the only way i can cope with the world #and he said that's kinda punk of me. and i maybe got kinda lightheaded thinking how perfect he was.#but he's also literally insane. incredibly unhinged man.#purposefully puts himself into conflict with others in the hopes of getting to kick the shit out of some arrogant dickhead #and i think that's just how anarchic people are. we're all a little fucked in the head. no shade.

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copiawife · 1 year

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i went to this place today with a bunch of arcade and pinball machines and had a super fun time and now i'm thinking about arcade date fluff with copia....

#i lost track of time but we fully spent like 5 and half hours there lol and only left because i needed to eat #it was really fun!!#there was a phantom of the opera pinball machine and i played it a ton #i suck at pinball but it was phantom!! i couldn't help myself #it was based on the book and i kept nerding out on all the little details that i really liked #also played darkstalkers for probably over an hour #and i had to stop because i felt like i was getting carpal tunnel and i was getting way too frustrated because it was really hard #but i grew up playing a lot of arcade games so i had a lot of fun!!#we already know copia is a Gamer so i think going to an arcade with him would be really funnn #gonna cheer him on while he tries to get the high score on a game<33 #and being totally in sync playing co-op games and still trying to one-up each other even when we're on the same team hehe #we play a fighting game and he's annoyed that i'm using the same strat i've used since i was a kid #which is just randomly mashing buttons and wiggling the joystick aimlessly until i accidentally figure out a combo and then spamming it #and more than that he's frustrated that it's working and i keep winning #i could go on but yeah arcade dates my beloved <33 #what do you have to say doll?

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pearlymel · 1 month

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"Do i look like i can work right now?"

Summery : he's needy for you and he's not afraid to show it <3

wc : 2k

Warnings : NSFW, fem!reader, ōral (f! recieving), bit of dry humping, making out, protected sex. Petnames used (honey, love, sweetheart.) No plot.

He was so done for.

Zayne exhaled shakily against your neck, his hands squeezing firmly at the dip of your waist for stability. He sounded needy, he looked needy, it's taking everything in him to not rip your nightgown off.

"You should be resting, but you occupy my every thought." He uttered in a hushed tone, but made no real effort to take you off his lap, instead pulling you even closer using his knee and burying his face on your chest.

"You're practically latched on me, Zayne." The words just rolled off your tongue it was almost infuriating.

Zayne wrapped one arm around your hips, keeping you firmly on his lap as the chair kept rocking back and forth with your combined weight. His other hand traveled up your back, up to your shoulder and neck, pulling you further down so he could nip at your collarbone with a sharp canine.

"You're one to talk, sweetheart. You're not being very cooperative with being treated properly, always gambling your life away—" he sounded frustrated, the last few words coming out in a low grumble.

You ignore his words, instead bringing your hand to playfully pinch at his earlobe before whispering, "is this how you usually treat your patients, doctor?"

"This is..." Unprofessional, he almost said, he knew well there wasn't anything professional about how he was acting with you at the moment. "...An exception."

He then continued to litter your skin with open-mouthed kisses, his hand trailing up to find your nape, tangling his fingers into your hair, playing with the textured strands.

"Is it because I'm that special someone?"

You really have no idea what kind of effect you had on him. Zayne's teeth grazed against your pulse point lightly, his tongue darting out for a brief taste of your skin. He would be lying if he said that he wasn't very affected by you.

"My special someone," he murmured, and can't help the low gasp that escapes his throat when you start rolling your hips against his, feeling himself going dizzy.

"M-my love," he protested weakly, a visible growing tent forming in his bathrobe, making it harder for him to stop himself from pulling you harder against his lap.

He grabbed you by the thighs and leaned back into the backrest, giving you less space to move but a better angle to straddle him instead. "Don't stop," you whisper next to his ear while you try to continue pushing yourself further into him that he had to suppress a moan.

Zayne was sensitive man, being pent up most of the time, so touch straved. "You're a terrible patient, you know that? Insatiable." He managed to get out.

"I'm a different kind of patient," you hum, trailing your fingertips along his visible bare skin of his chest.

He was going to combust if you didn't stop touching him like that.

"You're dangerous." he almost whimpered, his hands moving back to grip your hips, as if to steady them on his lap, but it took every ounce of his willpower not to grind them against his crotch.

God was he done, Zayne finally wrapped a hand around the back of your neck and pulled you back down for a crushing kiss. It was less of a kiss and more of a possessive mark, hungry and rough.

He wanted you, needed you, he couldn't get enough of you. His tongue delved into your mouth with a greedy swipe, tasting you, as if he was drowning in you and the only thing keeping him alive was your kiss alone.

His breathing grew erratic as his hands slid down from your hips, grabbing the backs of your thighs and squeezing at the flesh, pressing you more firmly against his lap so his obvious hardened cock was rubbing between your legs.

Your sounds were unforgettable, Zayne could never forget them, the gasps and small whimpers of pleasure. He was already gone.

"Goddamn it..." he cursed hoarsely against your mouth, his hands clenching tighter under your thighs, guiding your motions on his lap before bucking up roughly, letting out a quiet groan of his own in the process.

"such a foul mouth, doctor,"

"Don't push it," he grumbled, lifting you up to his waist, "Push it?" You ask while wrapping your arms around his neck as he walked you to his room, and upon the realization, tap on his shoulder, "wasn't i supposed to rest—"

"That doesn't mean you can't rest after, does it?" he responded, moving over to the edge of the bed before slowly lowering you down onto the sheets, his body caging you in between his arms and legs, his form hovering over you.

He wasted no time sliding his hand underneath your silky nightgown to feel your skin, pulling the fabric above your head, guiding your arms up.

Zayne was a weak, weak man. Weak for seeing you like this, glossy eyes, lips slightly swollen from his kiss and the way your chest rose and fell heavily with every breath. Just being able to see you like this alone was a privilege.

He let his hands roam over the curve of your stomach, "so pretty," he muttered, his eyes raking over your form.

He leaned down to graze your neck with a trail of open-mouthed kisses, his lips lingering and nipping the skin, he then slowly traveled down your collarbone and to the valley of your chest, his fingers fiddling with the clasp of your bra the entire time.

"Lift your hips." he commanded quietly, sending a shiver down your spine and heat pooling down as you obliged to his words.

The last thing on you, and Zayne was pulling the fabric out from underneath you, throwing the bra somewhere on the floor, his eyes dark as he raked his gaze over your soft mounds, "I'm never getting tired of this view." he whispered breathlessly, Upon holding your wrists down and claiming your lips again, it was impossible to not be sent into the next cardiac arrest.

Well good think your doctor is always here to tend to you.

"I've.. missed you,"

How was he supposed to hold back when you sounded like that? Your voice coming out in a low, needy whisper that drove him over the edge.

"You need me." he groaned, releasing your wrists so both his hands could run down your sides, hooking his fingers into the waistband of your panties before giving the fabric a tug. He reached over, grabbing one of your legs and hooking your knee over his shoulder before pressing a gentle kiss on the inside of your knee, He continued to make a trail kisses up your thigh until he reached right infront of your wet folds.

Zayne looked up when your hand came in contact with his hair while letting out a shuddering breath and a whisper of his name, your gazes heated as he moved his head further down to your core, using one hand to keep your thigh pinned over his shoulder before his eyes fixated on your clit, leaning down to kiss it.

You gasp. His tongue flicked out, tasting you, before he began to suck on your clit, his fingers trailing up to play with your hardened nipples, rolling and pinching them gently with his thumb and forefinger. He hummed when you start squirming, his tongue skillfully flicking and rolling around the bundle of nerves, Zayne didn't stop at just your clit, though.

He trailed his tongue lower, teasing your entrance, and you couldn't help but tug at his hair, hips coming to slowly grind against his face. "Stay still, you're doing well," he praised, his voice low and soft, you best know he's trying so hard not to rut against the mattress from how achy he felt. His tongue sliding in and out, coating it with your arousal. You could feel yourself getting closer, the pressure building up inside you.

And you think you might pass out when he starts sucking down. It was hard to stay still when you're so close to orgasm, that it was making your head blank, eyes half-lidded and heavy breaths coming out of your lips as you arch your back when you taste the sweet pleasure of your release.

Zayne lifted his head from between your legs, licking his lips appreciatively and giving your stomach a few fluttering kisses. "You okay there, honey?" He asked in a low, hoarse voice as he watched how your eyes were still half lidded, and how your draped your arm over your face.

You only nod in return, letting out a low "Mhm,"

He couldn't wait until he was on his knees positioned between your legs, throwing his bathrobe off from his body before reaching down to his painfully hard cock, stroking once, twice, and he had to stop himself because he could most definitely jerk off just by looking at your face, especially when you're naked like this.

Zayne swallowed thickly, shaking his head to himself from any other thoughts before reaching over to the nightstand and grabbing a condom, tearing it between his teeth then rolling it on himself, making sure it was on securely before moving between your legs.

He pressed the head of his cock against your entrance, staring into your eyes, waiting for you to give him the go-ahead. You nodded, your eyes still heavy with need, and he slowly pushed into you, his cock filling you up inch by inch.

Your jaw hanged, your body adjusting to him, your walls gripping his shaft. He continued to thrust in slowly, "you're the only thing..." He panted breathlessly into your neck, "the only thing i need in my life—" and he continued to rock against you with his thrusts slow and deep.

Zayne was taking his time now, slowly and with intent, he wanted to show you how much this moment means to him, how much you mean to him, how everytime you both have sex, it would feel like the first time every single time.

He lifted his head so that he could look at your face more clearly, his hands running over your sides, tracing the curves and the softness of your body, his fingers touching your skin as if to burn the feel of you into his memory.

His hand then trailed to your left wrist, taking your hand into his to interlace your fingers together, while his thumb brushed over the empty spot on your ring finger.

He internally cursed at himself for not getting you that ring he saw when he was on the way to the hospital. The beautiful gem resting on the window display, calling for him even.

Why didn't he just get it so he could make sure no one would ever look your way when they get the hint of the shiny ring sitting at your left ring finger?

Zayne then picked up the pace, his thrusts becoming harder and faster, your voice growing louder, accompanied by his frustrated grunts.

He could feel himself getting close, his thrusts becoming more erratic, "Come on, my love," he urged you desperately, "a-ah, Zayne—!" With a loud moan, you came, your body shaking and your legs convulsing around his waist.

He followed right after, slamming deep into you, his cock pulsing as he came, filling the condom with his hot seed. He held you close, both of your breathings heavy, taking a moment to hold you both close before slowly pulling out to dispose of the condom.

"Still have enough energy for cuddles?"

"Mm, I'd want nothing more than cuddles right now."

A smile formed on his face at your words, gently shifting himself back on the bed so that he was beside you, pulling you into his arms.

He wrapped his arms around you, and he let out a content sigh, his fingers tracing idle patterns on your skin, his head in the crook of your neck again, inhaling the scent of you, and he realized that he could stay like this forever. "Just a bit more before i clean both of us up.."

#zayne smut #zayne love and deepspace #love and deepspace zayne #love and deepspace #love and deepspace x reader #zayne #lads zayne #zayne x reader #zayne x you #lnds zayne #love and deepspace smut

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