#and to connect it to how Dick becoming robin was born out of a place of grief but also a place of moving forward

[welcometogrouchland]

you guys don't need context for this. He's the boy of all time!

[bigskydreaming]

I am looking (disrespectfully) at the trope of Bruce and other family members only seeming to respect Dick’s wishes when doing so aligns with what they already wanted to do.

Let’s go to the examples!

1) Bruce not broaching adoption with Dick because he wants to respect Dick’s first parents and feels like he would be taking their place or overstepping or putting himself in between Dick and his memories of his parents. Sometimes its cited that Dick himself expressed this wish early on after his parents died, sometimes its not and this is still just upheld as Bruce’s reasoning for not adopting Dick before he was already well into adulthood.

THE FATAL FLAW (in mine own personal opinion, natch. Personal mileage may vary, check your speedometer to be safe):

This particular plot point or tangle is in my experience ALWAYS paired with Bruce’s own insecurities about his role in Dick’s life, or not wanting to push that or receive an answer he doesn’t want to or is afraid to hear. Sometimes its about his fears of unworthiness to be Dick’s actual parent, etc, etc. But the bottom line is, there is always the presence of SOME element (and not a small one) in which Bruce’s own self-interest or feelings are protected by him NOT broaching the adoption conversation with Dick and having to confront these fears head on.

This is additionally juxtaposed with the problem that although there’s a lot of variance in regards to stories where Bruce fired Dick versus stories where Dick gave up being Robin and moved on to Nightwing voluntarily....there’s NOT a lot of stories where Dick makes Jason Robin himself or is asked by Bruce first. The part where Bruce takes this initiative on his own, without thinking through its repercussions on Dick emotionally.....this is practically always present.

Now, the problem here is that......Dick became or began becoming Robin well into his time with Bruce. Its frequently cited as the thing that began allowing them to truly connect, their time training and acting as Batman and Robin.

Meaning no matter WHAT interpretation you go with as to why specifically Dick chose the name Robin, whether it was a family nickname or an homage to Robin Hood.....the fact remains, NOTHING of Robin, THEMATICALLY, nothing that spoke to Dick in regards to what he wanted Robin to be - specifically in honor of his parents because avenging his parents and making sure what happened to them didn’t happen to others like, this was literally a key part of what bonded Dick and Bruce, the fact that Bruce was TRYING to help Dick specifically BECAUSE they shared this particular overlap of purpose - like the bottom line is, nothing about Robin CAME from Bruce. Or Dick’s feelings about Bruce. That....didn’t really even exist yet, at the time he created Robin. Everything about Robin, other than the physical costume itself, not even the design just the actual creation of it....all of that came from BEFORE he met Bruce. None of it was thoughts or feelings derived from BRUCE. Its the whole reason Dick was never Batkid or Batlad, or any derivative of Batman.

It all, ALL came from what Dick came to the manor WITH. Remnants of his life with his first family.

So the fatal flaw of Bruce’s reasoning that by not broaching the subject of adoption with Dick before well into adulthood, he was actually just respecting Dick’s relationship with his first parents and not trying to come between them and Dick’s memories and feelings about them....

All of this is inherently undermined by Bruce’s own actions.....when by repurposing Robin to ANY degree, even just to give the mantle to Jason.....this meant that he was inherently viewing Robin as being more about being Batman’s partner, HIS partner....then it was about being Dick’s heritage, his last intangible keepsake of his first family and life BEFORE Bruce.

In effect....Bruce making Jason Robin or firing Dick as Robin, either way....both betray Bruce’s OWN alleged intentions for only wanting to respect Dick’s relationship with his parents, and that being why he didn’t want to overstep by trying to impose or even ask for his own official parent/child relationship with Dick. Because that’s exactly what appropriating the Robin mantle was. It was Bruce ignoring the relationship Dick had with his parents and their memory and the fact that Robin was directly born of that....and making Robin entirely about Bruce’s OWN relationship with Dick, heedless of any other factors.

And the second Bruce did that.....his entire justification for not raising the adoption issue....disappears. It goes away. Because you can’t claim inaction being just a result of not wanting to disrespect something you’ve already voided respect for. No matter whether Bruce INTENDED it or not.....by crossing this boundary, Bruce already acted against Dick’s feelings in this regard and well, disregarded them....which makes claims of Bruce not raising the adoption issue pretty much JUST self-serving at that point. Its an alleged viewpoint of Dick’s that Bruce largely just ASSUMES....and only ultimately respects - in direct contrast to how he didn’t respect the associations Dick had with Robin - because it aligns with something Bruce ALREADY wanted to do, rather than what Dick actually wanted. It provided justification for Bruce to just....not have a conversation he was afraid to have. And that’s about Bruce at that point. Its not about Dick. Its just like...not.

2) Another example of this that is not unique to just Bruce, but recurs frequently in both canon and fanfics in Dick’s dynamics with other characters he’s close with.....is characters not apologizing for things they’ve done to Dick or raising the issue of things they did a long time ago but never apologized for....while claiming to do so because they thought DICK didn’t want to talk about it.

THE FATAL FLAW (in my own personal opinion. Nuances and variations may not be identical at all store locations, please see your local branch for details):

The particular problem I have here is that....Dick never ever ever in the history of ever and also the before ever time.....has EVER expressed a desire to avoid confrontation.

Like. That’s what he DOES. That’s his JAM. That’s literally CITED time and time again as one of the reasons he’s viewed as more of a people person and natural team leader than Bruce and other Batfam members....because he’s not afraid to cut straight (or bi) to the heart of the matter and air out a dispute.

In fact, this very character trait is one of the ones most commonly utilized AGAINST Dick in various depictions of him, as he’s often cited as TOO confrontational, TOO eager for a fight or conflict especially when his temper is engaged, such as when he’s well....personally hurt or offended.

So how does it follow, then, that avoiding tough conversations ONLY when its on the OTHER person to INITIATE, because they were the ones who DID the wrong-doing and Dick the subject of that rather than the instigator....how does it work, exactly, that these are the only times in which we DON’T tend to see a direct conversation about the harms done and the fallout that resulted? With it being claimed that this is solely for Dick’s benefit, out of a desire to avoid pulling him into an allegedly unnecessary (but really just unpleasant) confrontation?

When the concurrent reality is that whether stated or acknowledged or not.....avoiding these specific conversations and ONLY these conversations (as there never seems to be a problem finding canon or fanfic stories in which Dick apologizes for harm HE’S caused to others or is clearly expected to).....this avoidance also carries the side benefit of allowing the character who DID something wrong to Dick to....not ever have to have that super uncomfortable conversation in which they actually verbally acknowledge the thing they did to him and the effects it had on him, and apologize for that.....and then render themselves vulnerable to actually hearing whether or not he accepts their apology or is still upset with them regardless.

While - as long as they DON’T ever have this conversation, for whatever reason - they can look to the clear and consistent precedent of Dick continuing to work with people who have done things like oh, I don’t know....punched him in the face cuz they’re mad at him (and this isn’t a Bruce critical point, this is a whole damn family critical point as the only one who HASN’T actually done this is Duke. Well, Cass technically just threw him out a window, but I mean, tomato toh-mah-to). Writers and characters both can lean on the fact that actually Dick has a pretty clear track record of ultimately giving up a grudge or at least showing a willingness to look past those grudges enough that it doesn’t prevent him from still maintaining or resuming some kind of relationship with the person who hurt him.

And thus, like Example Numero Uno......this ultimately just lets other characters off the hook while claiming to do Dick a favor, but actually Dick receives no real benefit from it and instead now just has another instance of characters saying “see we respect your wishes” when ultimately their inaction is MORE in service to their own wishes and self-interests.

2b) See also the variation of this in which characters such as Bruce, Jason, Tim and assorted others like....are written specifically determining that they’re not going to apologize to Dick or beg his forgiveness because they feel they don’t DESERVE to be forgiven, and once again....its in HIS best interests that they not even give him the opportunity to say he forgives them....because they know Dick Grayson of course, and they know he’s too forgiving for his own good, so its better to like....not make it ever a possibility in this particular instance.

With the problem here being like.....Dick can’t and shouldn’t be expected to KNOW that’s their logic? So....all he’s going to actually SEE is loved ones just....not expressing remorse for hurting him or acknowledgment it even happened? Which....hurts?

So......hurting your loved one MORE after already hurting them....because you don’t feel you deserve to be forgiven for hurting them in the first place and are actually PROTECTING them from being hurt more when mistakenly forgiving you.....by.....hurting and continuing to hurt them with your silence and lack of evident remorse....

Mmmm.....

Its not the best approach, y’know?

Flaws are detected.

3) Dick’s friends and family manipulating situations in order to get the end result THEY desire, while claiming to do so for his benefit only. Dick being willing to manipulate people to achieve his own ends comes up a LOT actually....but there’s relatively little examination of how often people do this to him, claiming his best interests but really just circumventing his clearly stated desires for independence and the right to make his own choices about what HE needs....or when this is brought up, its usually limited to JUST Bruce doing it, but uh....no that ain’t it.

Specific examples of this are like when Wally joins the 1999 version of the Titans specifically to get Dick to join up, because in his estimation Dick needs more of a social life and is drowning himself with his responsibilities....and then quits not long after Dick is finally officially invested in staying with the team. Another example is when Roy gets Dick to join the Outsiders based entirely on his pitch of NOT treating the team like a family, like they did with the Titans, so that Dick could keep emotional distance and not be as worried about losing them like he suffered from losses like Donna....with his claim again being that he worried about Dick in the aftermath of that loss, etc.

And to be clear! Its not that I think Wally and Roy and others who do similar things have NEGATIVE intentions in mind for Dick. That’s the whole point of this post.....like the other examples, I fully believe THEY believe (or writers believe when writing them this way) that they have Dick’s best interests in mind and not their own. I just....disagree.

THE FATAL FLAW (at least as I see it here):

Is that I view this and Batfam members who do similar stuff as like.....falling into the trap of the savior friend complex. Its that thing when you see a friend hurting, and over time get FRUSTRATED by seeing this when a solution seems obvious to you but think they won’t take it because they’re too stubborn or don’t know what’s best for them....with this specifically recurring a LOT with Dick in particular, due to his core characterization of wanting to be the one to make his own choices. The problem here, same as the problem with the savior friend complex....is that it treats the subject of these views as like....incapable of determining what they need. Its a tacit condemnation that they actually don’t know how to cope with things and are doing it wrong - even though the ones making this assessment will never be the ones actually having to LIVE with the outcome of their meddling. Its the conviction that someone like Dick needs to be HANDLED, for his own good....because he can’t be trusted to KNOW what he needs, not as well as them at least.....and so they jump to manipulation rather than just....ASK him what he needs, or HOW they can best support him, or even just WHY he’s making the choices he is.

For instance, the problem with what Wally did was never that Dick wasn’t struggling. He was. He was drowning in his responsibilities, he had very little to no life outside of them.....Wally is not remotely in the wrong for WANTING to do something to change this situation. The problem is Wally basically defaulted to just...HANDLING his friend by restarting the Titans just to give Dick a social life again, which is pretty much a line straight out of the comics...and basically railroaded right over Dick’s initial ‘no’ when he first heard the proposal. And kept pushing things until Dick eventually joined up in order to get Wally to commit to the team too, because Wally spun it as though Dick was helping Wally by getting Wally to commit to the team for the very same reasons Wally wanted Dick to. And then....right after that, Wally quit to go back to just focusing on the Justice League, which was part of what Dick predicted would happen all along.

The thing was.....at no point along the way did Wally actually ask WHY Dick initially said no....he jumped straight to assuming his own view of the problem, that Dick just COULDN’T be made to ever see the reason to take a break occasionally and put his mental and emotional health as a priority. If he’d done this, Wally could have had dozens of other options to achieve his desired end result....he could’ve like....set up regular hangouts with Dick. 

But Wally jumped to assuming he knew the answer, he knew what was best for Dick, and that Dick’s logic was inherently self-destructive and self-flagellating.....and he felt the solution was to bring back the Titans, as he recalled their earlier times as Titans together as a time when Dick was better able to balance his social life and responsibilities.

But by not ever stopping to LISTEN to why Dick felt the way he did and was initially opposed to rejoining the Titans....Wally overlooked one crucial fact: He isn’t Dick.

And more important, his view of the past wasn’t Dick’s view of the past.

Wally was a lot more capable of viewing the Titans as not just a family, but an inherent social life, a hangout, a kind of club....because that’s what it had always been to him.

But he’d never been the leader.

Throughout all their childhoods, the whole time the Titans WERE all of the above, and relatively light-hearted in comparison to their older selves....Dick STILL had the weight of responsibilities that none of the others had by virtue of just...not being the leader. Ultimately, all of their lives were in HIS hands. He was the one calling the shots. The buck stopped with him.

And this is precisely WHY Dick had gotten to the point he had in adulthood. It wasn’t because he’d changed. It wasn’t because he’d stopped figuring out what he needed and how to take care of himself. Its because the position he’d ALWAYS been in as leader....has WEIGHT. That eventually added up more and more and weighed him down. A huge part of the reason Dick had ended up leaving the Titans in the first place, before they disbanded prior to the 1999 revival....is because of the sheer WEIGHT of all the deaths and misfortunes that had befallen the Titans....and how much he and he alone struggled with it in ways the others didn’t....because they didn’t have to. It hadn’t been their plans, their calls, their RESPONSIBILITY to find a way the others could have all made it out alive or at least less traumatized.

So.....of COURSE Dick said no when Wally first proposed restarting the Titans, before Wally defaulted to using his own membership as a lure to get Dick to agree.....because......nothing about the above paragraph had changed, via Wally’s ‘plan.’ It wasn’t because Dick just didn’t KNOW how to be a fully rounded person....it was because nobody was helping him find actual OPTIONS for doing that....that didn’t just double as MORE responsibilities! Because that’s exactly what ended up happening! Dick wound up the leader of the Titans again, just as responsible and just as invested as always.....just like he always knew he would....and also as he knew would happen...Wally ended up quitting not long into it and persuading Jessie Quick to step in as his replacement....aka just one more person for Dick to worry about when it wasn’t like he was going to be worrying any less about Wally, just now he wasn’t going to have Wally there to even POTENTIALLY be able to support him when tragedy inevitably struck because they’re freaking superheroes....and instead he’d just have another person looking to him for the answers but with no reason or chance of being the support Dick could ACTUALLY use at times like that!

Wally’s manipulations circumvented Dick’s opinion that no, actually he knew what was best for him and it wasn’t what Wally was suggesting....without actually accounting for the fact that hey, Dick might actually know that. And in the end, Wally got the result he was after, he got to feel that he’d HELPED his friend....which again, this isn’t WRONG to WANT to....but Dick didn’t...exactly....benefit from this. It wasn’t actually in his best interests ultimately.

I mean...see Donna’s death for details.

And in the aftermath of THAT....Roy essentially did exactly what Wally did....just in REVERSE! Roy got Dick to agree to lead the Outsiders, to shoulder responsibility once again....by promising that Dick WOULDN’T have to view them as family. And did Dick go too far and end up TOO uncaring about their welfare? Yup! No disagreements there! Problem is though....he only ended UP in that situation because yet again a friend thought they KNEW the solution to what Dick needed.....only for Dick to end up essentially punished and further self-blaming....just for doing exactly what Roy had told him TO do, with this particular team. Again - Roy hadn’t EXPECTED Dick to take it this far. But that’s the whole point! Roy had expectations about what Dick would ACTUALLY end up doing, that didn’t match up to the pitch Roy actually gave Dick to GET his agreement.....because Roy all along was of the assumption that by virtue of being Dick Grayson, he wouldn’t be ABLE to avoid connecting with these new teammates and viewing them as family, and thus he’d end up ‘snapping out of it’ with it being the funk he’d been in since Donna’s death.

Roy’s intentions might have been noble, once again.....but his methods stuck to the same pattern of people around Dick believing they knew what he needed or knew who he was or knew what it meant to BE Dick Grayson....better than Dick actually did...particularly when Dick said no, this isn’t what I need or this isn’t a good idea or just...I don’t want to do this.

And in the end....its Dick who ended up paying the price for it, as well as the people who got hurt because of his INTENTIONAL emotional distance.....because the ‘view all surrounding people as new surrogate family’ aspect of the Dick Grayson Experience hadn’t kicked in as Roy thought inevitably would....but the ‘view all this as directly my fault and suffer guilt for it forevermore’ aspect of the Dick Grayson Experience most certainly did! Not at all actually helped along by the fact that like....Roy also expressed frustration with Dick that like.....Dick hadn’t actually responded to Roy’s intended manipulation of his emotions the way Roy had expected him to when he EXPRESSLY TOLD DICK TO BEHAVE THE WAY THAT DICK ULTIMATELY BEHAVED. (Just, he didn’t tell Dick to dial that all the way up to Extra, but given that’s the only setting Dick does ANYTHING at, I feel its a possible outcome Roy should have at least considered. I mean, wasn’t the whole point that you know Dick Grayson better than he knows himself?)

But lo, I am salty.

LMAO, but I mean, you get it right? Obviously, I LIKE Wally and Roy. I LIKE Jason, etc. I’m not saying all of this to be like ugh how dare these characters do all this to Dick....I’m saying it because like.....they all keep falling into the same patterns of making a big fuss and acknowledgment of how much Dick prioritizes being able and free to make his own choices and decide what’s best for him and what HE wants.....

But without ever like....actively asking him AT THE RELEVANT TIME....what he thinks and feels about all this. What he thinks and feels he needs. What he ACTUALLY wants from them, or why he’s ACTUALLY saying no to something and maybe it being for reasons that aren’t just him inherently being stubborn and self-destructive.

And instead just defaulting to falling back on whatever he might have said or expressed in an entirely different context at an entirely different time.....and saying okay, by doing so, we are abiding by his wishes and thus doing what he wants and respecting his right to make his own choices.....

But ONLY when doing all of the above just so happens to align with these other characters then getting to do the thing or take the approach they’re already predisposed towards wanting to take because of their OWN self-interests at the same time.

With this never actually coming into play when respecting Dick’s wishes aligns with them taking actions they DON’T personally want to undertake, because it makes them uncomfy or they think its a bad call, even if it is something that should be his call to make.

Like....the pattern. It very much exists. And abounds. Like I could cite examples allllllllllll the way up to Ric Grayson, where Bruce respected RIC’S wishes to be left alone and not interfere in his life no matter what.....in ways Bruce almost never respects Dick’s actual expressed wish for Bruce to butt out of matters when Bruce is actually quite keen on meddling and would very much like to....

But notice how the other thing about the Ric Grayson storyline is that Ric’s expressed desire to stay the fuck out of vigilantism and superhero work, like.....just so happens to align with Bruce’s longstanding desire for Dick to like...get out of the vigilantism and superhero work? With butting out of Ric’s life and respecting his privacy in ways Dick has to FIGHT him for, like......absolutely the optimal action to take in order to allow this expressed desire of Ric’s to flourish in the ways Bruce always wished would kick in for Dick?

.....just saying. 

The pattern. It abounds.

And the key to breaking any pattern, of course, is to first recognize....and acknowledge....that it exists.

Otherwise you tend to fall into the trap of repeating and perpetuating it over and over without even realizing it, simply because its what’s familiar.

This has been A Post by Me. Thank you and have a nice day. Or don’t. Idk. I’m not the boss of you. Whatever.

[why-this-kolaveri-machi]

it’s a fucking metaphor!

Titans 3.08

i’ve finally gathered the mental and emotional resources to do this thing, so let’s go! as always, i’m typing this up as i see the episode.

SPOILERS AHEAD

1. on watching this opening scene, i was thinking back to how gar was in s1, or even the early bits of s2. the way he idolised the others, particularly dick, and his readiness to go along with whatever they said, and the way he practically bled the need for acceptance. and here he is now, openly defying dick, fully open to and aware of the flaws of the people he loves and admires, knowing he is accepted no matter what and extending that generosity elsewhere. it’s a remarkable bit of character growth that’s... sort of blossomed in the background and so rewarding to see and acknowledge. 

1.25. i guess what i really love about this conflict over how to respond to jason--as clumsily as it is sometimes written--is how their histories and individual traumas inform each character’s reaction. dick is torn between his guilt over what’s become of jason and his drive to do what batman had essentially given up on doing: he is motivated to track down red hood at all costs but there’s a sense that he’s not completely sold on the idea that the only way to stop him is to kill him. (he might go the comics route and try to put him in arkham? god, imagine if the season ended with jason in arkham.) kory’s never had much of a connection with jason in the first place, and jason has done one of the worst things he could do in her book: track and kill a member of her newfound family and is threatening to kill more. 

and gar... sure. look. the idea of jason and red hood as separate entities appeals to him; that red hood emerged when jason was drugged to the gills by scarecrow and lost his usual inhibitions. gar’s struggled with what he becomes when he’s pushed to his limits, too--he did rip open that experimenting scientist with his teeth way back in 1.07, after all, and he was brainwashed by cadmus in s2 into becoming a literal monster. he needs to think, to know, there’s a dichotomy, a line that can only be crossed under extreme duress or by outside influence. 

and he says--and we say--that he was accepted back into the titans in spite of what he’d done, but was he really? gar’s always struggled with his footing in this group; relegated to the caretaker, the tech guy, the gatekeeper, and sometimes punching bag even though everybody’s paying lip service to how much of a family they all are. perhaps gar reaching out to jason and offering acceptance is aspirational on his part: perhaps this is the effort he hoped the titans put/or will put into getting gar back, even when it would seem like he’s too far gone.

1.5. anyway my point is that i don’t think it’s worth discussing this in terms of right/wrong decisions because all of their reactions make a lot of sense given their backgrounds/personalities. gar is doing a fine job here of tracking down jason’s friends and trying to find him that way, but we the audience know that jason is ultimately going to end up an anti-hero/eventually-hero character, so with that knowledge in mind we know that gar’s reaction is the right one. it’s knowledge that the other characters don’t have, so to judge them on it is... uh, unfair.

1.8. also, molly is awesome, yay!

2. dick and barbara flirting over the phone is so cute! i love to see this side of dick: lighter, peppier, willing (even if somewhat reluctantly) to put his mission aside to go out on a date with his girlfriend. and i love how easy this makes his dynamic with kory too: it’s all very domestic and utterly delightful. 

(also, re: the water leak in barbara’s office--you’re saying GCPD could afford fancy-schmancy table-wide touch screen computers and evil-lair lighting but needs its frickin’ commissioner to catch leaking water from above her desk with mugs and fishbowls????)

2.2225. this is probably a teeny tiny thing and i’m not sure i want to bring it up at all BUT. the fact that dick feels compelled to lie to barbara about not liking fancy gala food and eating something more substantial before the date? not a terribly great sign, though i wouldn’t call it a red flag per se. 

“this from a man who forced his students to eat cauliflower crust pizza...”

3. so.... conner and kom are a Thing. huh.

in theory i really like the idea of them bonding over an innate alien-ness and longing for a place they could really belong. both of them are alien twice-over: conner a mix of kryptonian and human, practically generated in a test tube, and kom being somebody that was born different and rejected by her own people, now stuck on a planet dominated by an entirely different species. i even like them exploring this bond physically. i guess it’s the sense of... uneasiness around what we do and don’t know about kom that makes this scene land slightly left of centre to me. i think titans, especially through s2, has cultivated in its audience a sense of distrust even until the final episode, just in case somebody vital to the season is suddenly revealed to have had ulterior motives (i’m even low-key suspicious of leslie). i really want to see this kom-conner dynamic play out but the anticipation of watching the other shoe drop is sucking out the enjoyment.

4. for fuck’s sake dick, gar’s not your gatekeeper.

TIIIIIIIIMMMMM \O/

4.5. i love this nod to tim’s origins in the comics, the way he just comes in and lays out all his evidence and makes it clear to dick that he needs tim’s help as robin. the fact that he was there at the flying graysons’ last performance, he was obsessed with their acrobatic moves, and was observant enough to connect those moves with that of robin and later nightwing... all of this came together to put him where he is right now.

(i also love how he can’t contain his giddy excitement when talking about the day dick grayson’s parents died... to dick grayson. even if dick weren’t nightwing, that would be a deeply uncomfortable thing! yet tim can’t help himself, and i love him for it.)

4.8. it’s a testament to how much dick’s caught off-guard that he can’t come up with a better response to tim’s allegations other than “uh... he stole my moves! as you know, no two gymnasts in the world are allowed to do the same moves. now, let me escort you out while pretending poorly that i’m not at all shaken by this...”

4.9. i’ve talked about this before, but i find the logic around secret identities in this universe utterly fascinating. the titans don’t make much effort in keeping their identities secret: everybody seems to know that kory is starfire for instance, or that gar is beast boy. dick grayson is seen hanging out with kory a lot, especially at crime scenes. it won’t take a lot of sleuthing to find out that the titans are currently camped out at wayne manor, and to put two and two together.

my theory was that superheroes and villains have become such an integral part of daily society that it’s almost not worth it to seek out their secret identities, or that it’s just not a big deal anymore. like politicians or diplomats, not everybody bothers to look into who exactly their local politician is, but the people who know just... know. it’s a sort of unspoken social contract.

tim’s broken this contract by confronting dick about his identity, and dick’s not ready to deal with it. not entirely.

look at him! *pinches his cheeks*

5. ngl, it was quite satisfying to see jason knock the scarecrow out like that. 

5.5. i guess... the question of jason’s culpability is always going to be a thorny one and would make for a great courtroom drama spinoff. there are a number of factors to consider: jason’s personality, the rough circumstances under which he grew up, his undoubtedly stressful transition to being robin, bruce wayne being... well, bruce wayne, never feeling accepted by the titans and having most of them turn on him, being roundly defeated and almost killed by deathstroke, alfred’s death, a fuckload of ptsd, his violent death, crane’s manipulations, coming back to life, crane plying him with a drug. but there is no easy line to draw between any of these factors to his actions. i think it would be a disservice to jason’s character to attribute his actions entirely to these things and rather irresponsible to do so. i think jason has to reckon with the fact that when he took crane’s drug, he wasn’t reckless and chaotic like the thugs he gave it to; the planning that went into hank’s death was meticulous and the way hank died--dawn essentially tricked into pulling the trigger that blew her lover into bits--is so drawn out and cruel. 

5.75. it’s occurring to me that crane might have given jason a placebo. maybe jason’s dependence is psychological, and he’s externalised his fears in such a way that he believes crane’s drugs literally wipe them out, however temporarily.

in any case, the boy needs (more) therapy.

6. “he walked like robin...” fuck, tim

“gait recognition sweep” god, this show. i don’t know whether to laugh or cry. hey, once we’re done doing this gait recognition thingy, can we get a goddamn plumber in the house??? or move the commissioner’s desk so that sewage water isn’t dripping on her head or the million dollar touchscreen desk???????

6.5. oh no dick!!!!!! i am delighted that you got hurt but i feel ashamed about it! that looked like it really hurt!

he’s really not having a good time of it, is he. from being shot by a sniper to slamming at full speed into an suv, he’s got to be really fucking battered by now. and that’s just the physical side of it.

“can you believe that just over a week ago i was sitting in san francisco eating cauliflower crust pizza and feeling good about myself for the first time in five years...”

7. kory’s having visions again! now that she’s figured what they are, do you think the show’s just dropped justin? it’s curious that HPG hasn’t been brought up in a while after featuring relatively heavily in the beginning. hmmm.

8. dick’s in hospital but... he looks remarkably whole for someone who took a spill like that. you’d think he’d at least have a bruise to show for it. on the other hand, i love that the first thing he says is ‘i need to call home’. reminds me of season 1 dick and his clumsy attempts to explain away his found family as an ‘alliance of necessity’ or some bullshit. what a long way he’s come!

*gasp* dick’s hallucinating again!!!!!!!!!!!! i’m doing the dick’s hallucinating dance! can you believe that we’re carrying over these huge honking issues unearthed in season 2 onto season 3? can you believe?!!! all that time and effort i spent talking about dick’s mental health from last season has not gone in vain!!

... ahem. anyway. more on this later.

“hold on barbara, i think kory gave me the number to this therapist that she kept calling Hot Psychiatrist Guy...”

9. just an interlude to say that i’m barely halfway through the episode and i’ve already written 2k+ words... ugh. i’m going to try and be more concise.

10. man i fuckin love it when titans goes all out with its weird mindscapes and i’m extra glad that kory’s the focus this time. is that baby kom or maybe a secret sibling that neither of them knew about? was that lady luand’r? and is this place where kory was circling where the secret sibling is? it’s all very intriguing. 

(if justin turned out to be that sibling... we’ve a real luke/leia situation on our hands.)

11. aw, i knew that nice security guard was going to die, but it still hurt to see him go :(

12. this show is so bizarre. like i get the mindscape as a narrative device, but jason using sex workers to try and vocalise his guilt about killing hank was just weird. like. i have to use tamil, sorry: idhulaan yaaru pa room pottu yosikara??? some things just can’t be translated into a second language.

i guess one way to interpret jason’s reckoning with what he did to the titans as a sign of him coming off crane’s drug, but i think it’s more to do with the disillusionment of realising that he was a mere pawn in a more sinister plan, and not, as he thought, a player in control of his destiny, rising to the purpose of liberating gotham of its fears in a way batman never could. along the way, he’s done some truly irreversible damage. it’s a bitter pill to swallow.

13. another hallucination! it’s really intriguing that it’s a young dick(?), younger than we’ve ever seen him, wearing an early-era robin costume from way before he even became robin. (this is also interesting in that it gives credence to the idea that ‘robin’ is an identity that dick created entirely on his own, and as a possible homage to his family.)

“old road, old house... it’s all gone.” i wonder what it all means.

13.5. it’s entirely likely dick’s hallucinating because of a brain injury from the accident, though just hallucinations without any other focal neurological deficit is unusual. he might’ve been microdosed with fear toxin at some point, though i wonder when... did jason do so after dick’s accident? did he get dosed at the factory from last episode? 

it’s also possible it’s a continuing manifestation of dick’s issues from last season--which, if you remember, he never told anyone about and therefore never properly addressed. maybe he was hallucinating bruce wayne in a psychotic episode accompanying an acute stress reaction and maybe that’s what’s happening now. nobody’s denying that he’s under an extraordinary amount of stress right now. another way to look at it is that this is how he externalises conflict that he can’t bear to suppress anymore; if in s2 halluci!bruce manifested his insecurities and self-loathing, then these hallucinations... something to do with his fears, no doubt.

yet ANOTHER way to look at it might be: rachel is reaching out to him through their, well, psychic bond. after all, they were able to use that bond unconsciously last season to get the titans back together; maybe rachel has learned to gain a degree of control over it in themyscira and is sending across warnings? it’s all very intriguing.

anyway:

“i hear you skipped over the discowing suit in your evolution to nightwing... how could you??”

14. can you imagine, gar did all the work of reaching out to jason via molly and jason wants to meet dick? smh.

14.5. “i’m just a regular guy doing regular things” he says, standing at the opening of a secret old tunnel, like a secret person doing secret things, confronting someone who can now officially be called his stalker. neither of you guys are ‘regular’

14.8. ‘my dad was a cop and he taught me how to investigate’ - hmmm. i guess they’re trying to Explain Tim but i don’t think that’s really necessary. so he’s smart and he’s obsessed with batman and robin--that should be enough, imo. 

15. that scene with scarecrow and his mother was... wow. i’m just laughing here helplessly, because what the hell? for a while i thought it was an extended dream sequence and i’m still not entirely sure that it isn’t...

anyway. i still love that titans is happy to throw out its plot in favour of extended character-exploration sessions.

15.5. it seems to me that this scene with crane and his mother (i have no idea if there’s anything in the comics similar to this) serves to move forward this season’s theme of harmful legacies and how parents can damage their children in the name of their mission. in a way it’s been the underlying message of the entire show but we’re really seeing it being reinforced this season. the titans, serving as a foil to scarecrow, are using the damage to rebuild themselves and actually work through their issues together, instead of spiralling further and further into the morass of their issues.

other than that... god, that scene was painful to watch. i can’t say i like this version of scarecrow or how this actor plays him at all.

16. i wonder what’s jason’s play here. i think he’s smart enough to realise that the titans aren’t going to just forgive him and let him be a titan again after what he did, and that dick agreeing to it is just a bid to pin both him and crane down. maybe it’s a ploy to trap them, get back on scarecrow’s good books so that he can have the drug again. who knows.

17. i absolutely felt dick when he said “we’ll bring him in and then re-assess the situation.” what the fuck else is he going to say? the priority is to get him.

so kory and dick are both hallucinating while potentially trying to rehabilitate their murderous siblings. CONFIDE IN EACH OTHER ALREADY

18. TIM NOOOO! you beautiful, reckless fool!

18.25. just to quickly address it here because i know it’s been brought up before: i think it’s perfectly justified to not have conner take tim to the hospital via superspeed because a) i don’t think we’ve seen conner do that with anybody so far and b) it’s probably not a good idea to submit tim’s body to that kind of stress without knowing what it would do to him. the paramedics with actual equipment and experience would be there in a few minutes, so on a risk assessment, i would say dick and conner absolutely made the right call.

18.5. i guess we won’t know what jason really intended to when the titans came to the pump to see him, but this is definitely going to set a big wedge in his relationship with crane. then again, crane got what he wanted--using starfire’s powers to blast through to the underground pipes--so jason can argue that this is exactly what he was working towards, too. 

anyway, mortal peril, hallucinations, murderous family members, creepy visions and robins sprouting left and right. time to get rachel and donna on the scene, i think.

[hauntedbythefanficsofmypast]

Roma Marinette pt. 1

Marinette's parents joined a traveling circus a year before Marinette was born. They make all the food that's sold as well as food for their fellow travelers.

Marinette is born in the circus. She is one of three kids. Only one year younger than Dick Grayson, Dickie as she grows up calling him, and five years younger than Johnny Grayson. Dick's nickname for Marinette is Marigold. Marinette takes to the Graysons she and Dick adore each other and all the Graysons love little Mari. With Tom and Sabine's permission they start training her along with Dick. Both kids fast learners with what seems like an ability to completely defy gravity and break its rules.

Dick and Marinette are stuck at the hip learning everything their circus family can teach them. Marinette is the one that decides that they should learn knife throwing and fire spinning. While Dick decides they are going to work out with the strong men and learn how to handle the animals. 

While they are still too young to join in on the trapeze they are allowed in the show. Together they wow crowds doing cartwheels, flips, and complicated floor routines together. Once they are 6 they are allowed to fly with the rest of them. Their shows garner more and more attention, everyone wanting to see the two youngest aerialists in the world.

Everything is perfect in their lives, until they go to Gotham for a show. Dick parents begin acting weirdly, hugging Dick more and more, while looking at him in a resigned manner. This causes both to worry a bit but they don't let it show. When Dick sees people messing with the trapeze both of them brush it off. Before the show they meet the young Drake family and take a picture together. Marinette and Dick are on one knee together with Tim sitting on their bent knees.

When the lines snap Marinette and Dick stand on the boards opposite of each other watching in horror as the lines snap. In minutes both are on the ground near the bodies, Dick crying silently holding his mother's bracelet while Marinette holds him tightly crying herself.

Bruce walks up and talks to the two and is slightly surprised to find that Marinette wasn't their daughter. Marinette smiles weakly telling them she was pretty damn close. Bruce comforts Dick before going to talk with the Commissioner and a Social Worker.

Before the end of the night Dick is packing up his stuff and getting ready to leave with the social worker. Bruce never leaves their sides. Marinette stops Dick from leaving and hands him her stuffed tiger named Sikhaya. Dick hugs it tightly before pulling out his elephant Zitka and giving it to her.

Marinette pulls him into a tight hug sniffling into his shoulder.

Mari- Don't you dare forget me Richard Grayson. We'll find each other again someday Dickie. So until then don't you dare forget me.

Dick- I could never forget you Bluejay. 

Two months later Marinette and her parents leave the circus and settle down in Paris. It breaks their hearts but after the Grayson's tragedy Tom and Sabine find it the best option.

Dick and Marinette don't see each other for a very long time, but they never forget the other.

Zitka is well loved and taken care of. The stuffed animal has a special place on Marinette's bed even when she is an adult. While Dick takes to putting Sikhaya on a shelf when his brothers come into the mix, not wanting it to be destroyed if they become destructive.

Dick grows up as Bruce's son becoming Robin when he turns nine. At thirteen he joins a team of young superheroes, at fifthteen he leaves behind Robin giving the mantle to his new brother Jason. He also begins dating Barbara. They break up a year later when Dick realizes he is continually comparing Barbara to Marinette. When he becomes seventeen he mourns the loss of his brother and nearly kills the Joker, only stopped by Batman. He takes a year break, taking counseling sessions with a reformed Harley Quinn. During his break he meets Tim Drake once again, he doesn't remember him however. He begins training Tim to find solace in acting as a brother again, he also digs up evidence on why the Drakes are terrible parents. Dick encourages Tim to become Robin, his first night out as Robin is Nightwing's return. When he turns 18 he goes to the police academy, and once he graduates he becomes part time and goes to college for business. He is 20 when Red Hood begins targeting the entire family. Jason was not prepared for how vicious Dick got when he shot Tim. Batman once again stops Dick in his anger, telling him once again that neither of his brothers would want him to kill. Jason uses this time to escape from the family and drops into hiding. He hacks into the Batcave and watches the caves videos and reading reports of what's happened since his death. When Jason finally comes back he is ashamed and is surprised when Dick simply hugs him crying. Things are tense between Bruce and Jason, but a few counseling sessions with Harley and their relationship is slowly rebuilding. Shortly after Damian comes into their lives. Dick is quick to knock Damian down when he attacks Tim. He tells Damian that he doesn't care who his mother is, or that he is Bruce's blood son. He slowly brings Damian into the family. While the boy is still distant and mean to the family they all notice he doesn't mean his insults anymore. When Dick is twenty-two he graduates college with a degree in business. He begins working at Wayne Enterprises as well, he mainly works from home and behind the scenes with Mr. Fox. No one outside the company knows he also works there, the entirety of Gotham believes he is just Officer Grayson.

Marinette grows up in Paris with absent parents. They love her but now that they have their own business they only have time for dinner with Marinette. While she is upset she joins gymnastics and aerial arts classes, quickly rising to the position of top student. She also begins going to regular school during her first day. She is so nervous she keeps tripping. The entire class soon begins to view her as clumsy, something that sticks. Even though Marinette only trips afterwards when someone does it on purpose, they choose to ignore the fact she catches herself quickly. While everyone believes she is just clumsy Marinette no one realizes that she is Paris's national champion in Gymnastics. Marinette is so good that they want her on Paris's Olympic team once she turns 16. When she turns ten she realizes she can sell her designs online. She pulls out all her notebooks pulling out her favorite designs and begins to make them all. Once done she creates a website under the name Marigold. On each outfit she hand stitches Mari in gold thread, for a signature marking. Marinette slowly makes friends outside her classmates, while they are nice they all stand by when Chloe attempts to bully Marinette and she doesn't like that. Especially when she sticks up for a few of them, she remains civil and polite to them although in her eyes she is clearly distant. When she is thirteen she becomes friends with Alya, the two girls slowly growing closer. She also develops a crush on Adrien that Alya blows way out of proportion wanting to help her new bestie. While Marinette likes Alya, Dick still holds the spot of best friend in her heart. Marinette also becomes Ladybug, she struggles at first but her years of training in flying helps her greatly and her aim has not deteriorated since leaving the circus. Marinette begins making less clothes and takes up karate classes as well four days go to gymnastics, two go to aerial arts and one to karate. Her three main instructors make the connection to her being Ladybug after a year, when Ladybug uses an aerial move that only she has ever used in front of them. 

Aerial Arts- Madeline Saint Cloud

Gymnastics- Tasha Buchanan 

Karate- Abraham Lebanon

Instead of confronting her the three get together and come up with a way to help Marinette. They start by deciding that Chat Noir either needs to get serious or get lost. One month later they all have solid examples of. why Marinette needs to bench him if he doesn't. It's at that time they confront her. Marinette attempts to lie saying that she isn't but stops when Madeline speaks up.

Madeline- My dear bird, you've never liked lying. You've rarely done it, and because of that you are truly terrible at lying

Marinette is dejected and apologizes to Tikki, but the Kwami just smiles telling Marinette that it wasn't the first time a Ladybug's mentor had found out.

Tikki- It's just never been three before!!

Marinette listens to her instructors carefully before telling them that she agrees. She tells them her partner looks through life with rose colored glasses. That while she does find him kind and silly she doesn't have a crush on him. That she doesn't find him as kind, caring, or as funny as Dick. She pauses after saying this, surprised that she hadn't said Adrien. Her instructors watch her as she closes in on herself taking a moment to sort through her thoughts. Once she is done a stray tear falls from her left eye.

Marinette- After all this time my thoughts still drift back to him…Chaton will never measure up to the person I truly love. His insistence and pushing do nothing more than cause stress on our partnership. I will look into having him either replaced or given one last chance.

That night she lays in bed hugging Zitka close to her chest as she stares out her open trap door at the stars. A few minutes go by and Marinette gets out of bed gently setting Zitka down. She walks over pulling the pictures of Adrien down, as well as his schedule tossing them all in the trash. Once done she climbs out onto her rooftop garden Tikki following her and sitting on Marinette's knee once the girl sits down.

Marinette- Adrien...Adrien Im sorry. I took your act of kindness and compared it to the kindness I use to have daily. Instead of seeing you, I saw Dickie. I thought I loved you, but I loved the kindness you showed me, that reminded me so much of him. I don't love you like that Adrien, instead of wanting to be your girlfriend. I just want to be your friend, so from this day on I will try harder to be that.

Two days later Ladybug tells Chat Noir to meet her on the Eiffel Tower that night after patrol. She tells him that she isn't in love with him and that she never will be. She knows she is coming off harsh and she tells him that, then explains that she needs to because after a year he is still acting like this. Chat is clearly saddened, this causes Ladybug to sigh and hug him.

Ladybug- I know it hurts, but you need to come to terms with this Chaton. You are my partner and you're like a brother to me. My heart is already taken, Chaton I have loved him since I was a child. Even if I was to date another right now I would just continue to compare them to my Robin.

Chat agrees to take things more seriously telling her that he still loves her, but he understands. He promises her that he will not let his feelings get in the way anymore. As the months pass the two become closer and closer. When Lila arrives Adrien already knows that she is lying and takes to avoiding her. When he spots Marinette getting put down by Alya and Nino for telling them Lila was lying he is quick to stand up for her. This causes a split among their classmates they don't want to be mean to Adrien, but he is always with Marinette. Lila is constantly telling the class that Marinette is bullying her and they want to do something but Adrien gets in their way. While Adrien and Marinette get closer they both realize one day that their partner in suits and civies is the same person. After them the two are rarely separate from each other. Gabriel finds Marinette very respectable despite Marinette being Roma, which would caused him to turn up his nose at first. He allows Adrien to spend more time with her, giving him permission to attend her gymnastics competitions. She is fifthteen when she becomes the new Guardian. By the time both are sixteen they have been outcast by their class and forced to the back. However they did not allow this to way down on them. Adrien had gained permission to model for Marinette along with their friends Luka and Kagami, and Jagged and Clara, two of Marinette's most famous clientele. Marigold was a very well known designer however no one knew what she looked like. Marinette never stepped out in public so the media didn't know the designer was a high school student. Marinette was also old enough to try for a spot on the Olympic team. She is sent an email the day of her birthday and Tasha laughs at the subtle begging in the email. Marinette is quick to agree and the four friends go out for dinner to celebrate. Only for it to be ruined when Lila shows up with Alya, Rose, and Alix claiming that they stole the table she reserved. Adrien was going to snap until Marinette placed a hand on his arm. She wiped her mouth standing up gracefully. She smiled politely at the four telling them not to worry the table was open now. The four walk away together not acknowledging Lila's glare. Marinette is seventeen when she participates in the Tokyo Olympics Adrien going with both her and Tasha. She uses Kaalki to get her and Adrien back to Paris for Akuma attacks. She loves her entire time in the Olympic Village. Marinette takes the gold for all four events. She is crying as she stands with her teammates four medals around her neck. Returning to Paris had been wonderful, she was greeted by the President and the Mayor and many fans. Adrien teased her relentlessly over the amount of fans she had. Once they returned to school the entire class demanded to know why Marinette never told them. Marinette simply sighs telling them she never kept it a secret. That she'd told them plenty of time she couldn't do something because of training. The class is really upset and they try to get Bustier on their side and the teacher just sighs softly wishing she never agreed with the Principal to teach Lila Rossi. Bustier knew she wasn't the best teacher but that girl destroyed her reputation by turning her class into the worst in the school. They are eighteen when they begin attending college Marinette for fashion and Adrien business. Marinette is nineteen when she and Adrien take down Hawkmoth only to discover Gabriel Agreste underneath. They hand him over to the cops before heading to the Eiffel tower together. Once there Adrien and Marinette de-transform and Adrien breaks down, Marinette pulls him into a tight hug tear of her own falling. Two months later Adrien sold off his father's company and the mansion. Moving into a cosy apartment with Marinette. Adrien takes the last name Dupain-Cheng and the announce it together on their way to the next Olympics when Marinette is twenty-one. She once again takes home all four gold medals, keeping her title for another four years. They graduate college together at twenty-two, and decide its time for the world to meet Marigold. Marinette reveals herself to the world as Marigold, and everyone in the fashion industry is talking about the young women who built her fashion empire before she was even 18. Adrien takes a job in her company head of PR. When they fully introduce themselves they become known as Marinette and Adrien D.C. The world is talking about the D.C. siblings, most of the conversations being around Adrien no longer going by Agreste. Together they travel the world, nothing changing in their lives until they visit Gotham, and Marigold receives an invitation to the Wayne Charity Event.

Marinette's first stop in Gotham is the place where the Graysons fell. Adrien goes with her hugging her gently as she softly cries. The next day she visits their graves alone, saying hello to the cold stone and asking if they remember her. She leaves flowers on the graves and a letter to each of them, including one to Dick. 

Marinette- Thank you for all you taught me and encouraged me to learn. I never thought I'd use my flying to save peoples lives when I returned to Paris.  Please continue watching over me and Dickie. I'm going to find him, I promise.

She leaves the graves feeling a lighter happy to have visited them once again

When the Charity Event arrived Marinette and Adrien D.C. couldn't wait to leave their mark on Gotham high society. Unknown to both of them that Dick Grayson had become Richard Grayson-Wayne.

@blackmagicforever

@chocolateherringtacofan

@mythogaychic

[headcans-oneshots-and-stuff]

Kind and lovesick... (HC)

Requested by a sugary-sweet Anon: hi !! 🌸🌸🌸 I love your writing, it really lights up my day ;u; can I request a headcanon with aged up damian (like 16-17) on how would he be during the courting process? I mean, I think he would do that, asking Dick and Alfred for advice as well ajshs. Flowers, letters, acts of service, and just being a very kind and lovesick boy?

A/N: Awwww thank you so so so so much!!! I totally agree with you and writing this was so thrilling. I have to warn you tho, it’s less kind and lovesick-fuff and more kind and lovesick-yandere-vibes. Most of the things I wrote are things that I think (more or less as extrem as here) are things that Damian would actually do, but right at the end I put a short Yandere addition that is definitly something only Yandere!Damian would do

First things first to establish what comes after:

When Damian Wayne first came to Bruce he made it clear to the people who called themselve their family that he did not feel love

Not for his family, not for anyone else

The only exception were his pets (and even that is something he wouldn’t openly admit)

But after some time he started to accept the others as his family

He started to accept that he maybe actually felt some sort of love torwards his family

Not that he’d ever tell them that

So, Damian Wayne doesn’t get crushes

He doesn’t simply ‘fall’ for someone 

And if he does he’ll ignore it and keep away from that person to eliminate that feeling that he sees as a weakness

So, if you really manage to make Damian Wayne, the grand-son of the demon, fall for you, be ready for him falling hard

like next level

It will take a lot for him to admit that he loves you

because, he will not act on his feelings until they have definitly turned into undeniable Love

So yeah

Now that that’s cleared, here we go...

Damian Wayne is a very stubborn boy, no matter his age

So he’ll want to make absolutly sure that the two of you end up together (but if you really don’t love him, if you assure him that there’s not a single chance for the two of you to become a thing, he’ll let go of it)

(But that may or may not ultimatly keep him from trying to have a relationship, if you’d break up for some reason or another during the realtionship he’d see that it just wasn’t mean to be)

But you (Anon) are completely right

He would definitly ask Alfred, trusting that man with his life, but he would be a bit hesitant torwards Dick and first try to establish the trust considering that specifc topic

He might also talk to Bruce about it, but only if Bruce somehow notices and adresses it first

It would actually be a while until he starts with the actual obvious curting

Giving you presents would open up to the opportunity of you denying those gifts

So at first he’ll definitly just talk to you

he’ll be a version of himself that is completely unknown to anyone

the last time he was that nice and showed his emotions that much was the week after he was born

He’ll try to get to know you better, but he’ll try to avoid becoming a normal ‘friend’ to you (thanks to unwanted advice from Jason)

But Damian can be a little manipulative shit

When he knows that you like him at least platonically and (especially when you’re the kind of person that wouldn’t easily do that anyways) knows that you won’t reject his advances straight-out...

Be ready to be spoilt

At first it’s simple things

When the two of you are out together (it doesn’t matter if with ot without others) and get something to eat, he’ll pay for you (not for others tho, so it’s kinda obvious that he likes you)

Then it comes to the next step where he’ll buy you things when he notices that you like them

If you tell him that you appriciate it, but don’t want him to gift you stuff that is expensive or in general, he’ll back off a bit and try to find another way to show you his love

But if you don’t (or at least not as obviously) he steps it up a notch more

He’ll find a way to ask you out on a date without making it too obvious that it’s supposed to be a date

He’ll bring you a giant arrangement of your favorite flowers (even if you didn’t tell him what your favorite flowers are) for your first date, but will continue bringing you smaller arrangements every time the two of you go out together alone or he visits you at your house

When the of two you are at the state where it’s obvious to both of you that you like each other and when you go to things that are definitly dates (even if you don’t title them like that) you’ll start getting letters from a ‘secret admirer’

The way this ‘secret’ writer describes the way he feels about you, the way he sees you and how he has never felt the way he did before, makes your heart beat faster

There are two ways this will turn out

The first is if you’re “smart” enough to figure out that Damian is the one who’s writing it, because then it would be most likely that you speak to him about it and either you will activly tell him that you feel the same or he’ll admit he wrote it and asks you to be his girlfriend, maybe guilt tripping you just a little bit by telling you that he never felt that way before and doubts that he will ever feel like that again

The second way is if you (for some reason or another) are too oblivious to notice the connection between the secret admirer and Damian. Let’s just assume that you start to also feel something for your ‘secret admirer’ and are torn between your feelings between Damian and this person. If you like it easy and tell Damian about it, he’ll out-right tell you he wrote it and even have ways to prove it, asking you afterwards if you want to be with him (and maybe teasing you later on that you liked him even when you didn’t know it was him, so you two just had to belong together), so very similar to the first way. But if you keep it from Damian- be it out of guilt for liking someone else two or just because you don’t feel like it’s his buisness- he’ll realize that something is off. At first he might think that something in the letters put you off, but he’ll investigate and soon find out that the letters were the problem, but for a very different reason. After getting Alfred’s advice, he’ll include something like a flower missing a single pedal or a necklace that fits perfectly with anothr one. Then he’ll ask you to meet him (as Damian) and show you the mssing piece, ending it the same way he’d do it the other versions too

Also, to end this, Damian Wayne is not afraid to use his Vigilante-persona to his advantage. He’ll make sure to place the letters in places where you won’t connect them with him immediatly (without being too creepy by, for example, leaving them on your pillow) or he’ll use it to find out what things you like to make your presents fit your preferences more

[Yandere Addition]

If all else fails, Yandere!Damian won’t give up immediatly. He’ll use everything he has to his advantage, including him being Robin. He is a manipulative mastermind when it comes to these thing and he will arrange to get you kidnapped, only to come to your rescue as Robin and “accidentaly” reveal who he actually is. Whether it’s some sort of Stockholme-syndrom where you think you love him simply because you feel like you owe your live to him or if you actually feel threatened by him, knowing that he could easily make you dissapear, he won’t care. He thinks that you just need to get to know him completely to find out that you actually loved him all along, that he is just helping you figure out the truth... He is just a kind and lovesick boy after all, what could be wrong about that?

[secretadventuresociety]

Episode 27 Recap

What’s up SASholes?! I’m Bren; resident SAStorian and note-taker extraordinaire. Welcome to Episode 27: Under New Management.

The Xarus Problem

We last left off with Kess staring down her jilted ‘lover’ (I mean, if you can call an arranged husband a lover), Xarus, who had just revealed he now owns her childhood home. Well, I say home. I guess childhood MANSION is technically more correct. Anyway, as this red-headed scum delights in Kess’ confusion, a flock of guards file in behind him all dressed in black; anticipating an attack. True to form, Pearce leans over to Kess and asks if he should shoot him, and she waves him away, blowing the whole thing off as a joke. Turns out that ole Xarus lost his humor in a tragic Born-Without-A-Soul accident, so he stares back flatly and invites the group to dinner; suggesting the trio clean up beforehand.

Kess loudly announces that her mother (Norse), Zev, Kü, and Pearce are going to… help… brush her hair? And Xarus just accepts it?? So the definitely-not-suspect group file up to Kess’ bedroom, led by Norse. The party takes in their spotless lavish surroundings in a mixture of disgust and disbelief-- and then they find their destination. The room might as well be adorned with a neon sign reading ‘Messy Kessy’. The colors inside are dark and earthy, with flora and drawings of fauna littering the walls, lit by a majestic bay window. In an awkward silence, Kü compares the living space to the shit-covered walls of his cavern home, then switches gears to ask if all fathers come with so much tension.

Norse gently explains that Xarus isn’t Kess’ father, but was her husband-to-be, who recently took over the house and the super-secret ‘family business’. Surprise-- Kess’ family is a band of merry Robin Hoods who keep Mardosta eating with silver spoons. Despite being there the whole time— Norse doesn’t quite understand how the boring, ginger-haired square of a man grew the balls to overthrow their reign of thievery; but she momentarily morphs into fantasy Vin Diesel (not actually, I know it’s a little weird ‘cause technically she’s a changeling and very much COULD do that) and tells Kess they can handle it As A Family.

An Iris by Any Other Name

After assuring The Nobodies aren’t going to kill Xarus in his sleep, Mama Shadowmore pulls Kess aside and leads her to the family greenhouse. It smells overwhelmingly like smoke, and as they enter, Kess sees hundreds of her black and white flowers. You know the ones. Norse then tells her how they tried to cover Kess’ absence, the way she would go into the greenhouse to just sit somewhere that smelled like her daughter (OUCH, dude), and all about the first night she saw one of the Irises appear. From that night on, Norse and Kess’ father Arthur would sit and wait for a flower to bloom; knowing somehow it was connected to their daughter’s safety. Now, if you thought your teeth were rotting out from the sweetness already-- that’s when Kess hugs her mom for the first time in years, and sometime during the embrace, Norse drops her high elf facade and embraces her daughter in all her changeling glory before Kess grows a flower just for her. Touching stuff. You crying yet? No? Just me?

Dry those eyes, though, because now we’re on to some shenanigans. As Kess and her mom are off repairing their relationship, Pearce and Kü attempt to make themselves at home. After grabbing a drink with Zev, the pair stake out a guest bedroom with an adjoining bathroom. Pearce ushers Kü inside and offers to guard the door as he showers, which the kobold has CERTAINLY done before. Tons of times. In his underground home. Despite this setback, Kü figures out the tub quickly, but the challenge becomes when he needs to drain the water. He finds a bucket, remembers that the toilet gets rid of its own fluid, and scoops up the grimy bathwater like a scaly Mickey Mouse. But that’s not all. Getting to the bottom of the tub, he notices a chain floating in the dregs and hauls out a crowbar to liberate it.

Pearce, hearing a sudden thump and fearing a sneak attack, manhandles his way into the bathroom and finds a wet Kü who laments about the ‘necklace’ at the bottom of the tub. The gunslinger quickly realizes it’s a chain for the drain (heh, a rhyme) and shoves Kü out. He then takes a pile of Zev’s clothes he found and dresses, appalled at the deep-v tunic and skin tight leather pants he is now sporting. Being his only choice, he chastely covers his bare chest and spikes his hair, coming out of the bathroom to help Kü shine his helmet. Yes, that helmet. Pearce is making Mother’s skull GLEAM. Kess, after realizing she could just change her form in lieu of ACTUALLY bathing, brings Kü a long silk tunic to replace his dress and steals a white button-up from her dad for Pearce. Now they’re Awkward Dinner Party ready!

Evil Exes, Amirite?

In case you’ve forgotten, Kess has a Brady-Bunch-worthy family. She runs into her dad, and later all three of her brothers: Zev, his twin Voss, and Rook. However, these aren’t all of the introductions the party is subjected to. As they enter the dining room in what I can only imagine is Oh My God They’re So Hot Slow Motion (with Kess donning her owl, Tibbins, for intimidation), they lay eyes on an unfamiliar and unimpressed elven woman who Xarus introduces as Sienna-- his current fiance. Well, he sure did move on fast. Between Sienna’s eye rolls, Kü’s harried feasting, and EVERYONE’S overwhelming discomfort, Xarus describes how he grew suspicious when Kess disappeared. After a little digging, he found out about the family’s arrangement with the city’s mayor, Vendreth; how he caught her criminal parents and promised them protection if they used their forces to help his failing city thrive.

Kess doesn’t see any issue, but Xarus laments that the townspeople have no idea who is running the show. It’s a clear threat, as Kess realizes the denizens would run them out of Mardosta if they knew the truth. Happy with himself and his mind games, Xarus invites his elven mistress to retire to their chambers with him…. if you know what I mean. She emotionlessly agrees, and the two leave the family alone. The Nobodies excitedly chatter about their exploits; no adventure going untold. Kü even introduces his mother, Marrow, and spends a moment praising Norse for being a good mother too. Pearce changes the subject to their treasure map, showing it briefly to Voss. He has no idea what the X’s could mean, but implores them to keep him updated. Norse then asks how long the party is staying-- enticing them with an upcoming festival that is SURE to have stickmeat. Kess proposes they stay for a while, saying they could make use of the family library and also figure out what the X closest to Mardosta hides.

Pearce not-so-subtly asks about the family’s trading habits, mostly trying to gauge if they have any dealings with his absent father. Turns out this ain’t an arms race, it’s a goddamn scene, and with routes halted in Larsham and Evercrest, the business has slowed down to a trickle. Kess breaks the business talk with a proposal for her companions and her siblings to go out on the town, and so they all prepare for a night in Mardosta. Pearce grabs his gun, Kess raids Rook’s training room for daggers (noticing a hefty potion collection), and everyone bundles up for the biting weather as they walk to the docks.

The Return of Nice Ghost

Kü spots a stationary boat in the water, with a rumpled dragonborn climbing out of it. Sus. As they get closer, they notice that it’s not a boat at all, but a disguised opening to a meeting spot called ‘The Underfrost’. Kess leads them down the cavernous tunnel lined with torches until they reach the bottom. Once there, they feast their eyes on merchants, a bar, and an imposing fighting pit-- all teeming with figures of all races. Kü jumps on the chance to, as he so eloquently describes it, ‘fuck shit up’; racing off with Voss and Zev in tow to sign up to battle. Kess instructs Pearce to place bets for the both of them as she grabs drinks… which turns out to be a monumentally bad idea. Pearce throws down 500 gold on Kü for himself but-- without express instructions from the druid-- dumps out her bag and wagers all of her 1,275 pieces of gold.

It turns out Kü is the next challenger to face… get this… Dickius Muscular. Is it his fantasy God-given name or a stage moniker? The world may never know. In any case, fervent hands push him toward the pit-- one attempting to remove his helmet. In retribution, Kü bites the tip of the offending person’s pinkie off, keeping his adornment as he summons a flood of shadows from it to cover him in armor. Thus the fight begins, and the massive goliath Dick...ius attacks our boy Kücifer with a mace in a blinding rage. Kü retaliates with his Bonemerang-- and when that does less damage that he expected, he summons Nice Ghost to keep him company. The spectral being chases after the goliath relentlessly; booping him any time he can come close. Dickius flees from the spectre, pursuing Kü-- who wreaths himself in shadow and disappears. Out of the darkness comes two fireballs, liberated from the kobold’s dwindling necklace.

Amazingly, this blast does not take his opponent out-- so Kü chugs a health potion as his vision suddenly goes green. He smells smoke and hears Mother in his head, asking to take a turn. He can do nothing but stare at Dickius as the shadows leave Kü to snake around the goliath and squeeze. Though deeply in pain, Dickius breaks free and heaves one last attack at Kü-- rendering him unconscious and sending Nice Ghost back into oblivion. With that, Kess rushes in to heal her friend, momentarily pissed at Pearce for losing all her money. Back on his feet, Kü shakily requests to be taken to bed, and the gunslinger scoops him up like a child and carries him; only to be repaid with a flow of vomit down his back as the kobold recovers slowly from his trauma. Still, Pearce keeps his composure and reassures Kü that he fought well, but begs him to try to sleep.

The Scream Heard ‘Round the Mansion

The group groggily returns to the family home and branches off to their respective rooms. Pearce gently lays Kü down and tucks him into bed before searching for a piece of paper and a writing utensil to pen a short note. He slips 200 gold into it and scrawls ‘I’m sorry’ onto the page. He slips out of the guest room to try and find Kess’ door-- and the one he picks, unbeknownst to him, is her parents’. However, our boy tried his best, so he returns to Kü; watching him as he sleeps. This dad-like worry Pearce has got going on makes me SOFT, y’all. I need MORE.

Kess, however, forgoes sleep for a time and instead grabs a bottle of wine from the kitchen. She takes it to the greenhouse and attempts to grow her second flower of the day-- which she has never done before. It takes a little more effort, but it does sprout, and she pleadingly asks to speak with the friend she grows them for. She waits, but no answer comes. Kess finishes the wine and stumbles up to her room, leaving the window open for good measure. She and Kü are sleeping soundly while Pearce fitfully wakes up from his perch on the sleeper sofa every so often to watch Kü’s chest rise and fall (PASS ME THE TISSUES). During one of his half-awake moments, Pearce watches the candle in the room extinguish and simultaneously hears a scream coming from downstairs.

Leaving the passed out kobold, Pearce takes off, only to be intercepted by Kess, who we all know has the passive perception of a dog waiting for you to drop that pepperoni on your pizza, Karen. She pulls him into the stairwell and they end up at the opening of Xarus’ chambers-- Sienna standing speechless in the doorway. When she ends up being less than helpful, the duo slip into the room, immediately laying eyes on the lifeless body of Kess’ failed groom. I wish I could say I was at all upset about this revelation, but I would be lying to you, dear readers. However, we now have a murder mystery on our hands! WHODUNNIT?!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

TL;DR

Our heroes attended a dinner party more uncomfortable than all of my family reunions put together. Talk about second-hand anxiety!

Kü is the Underfrost Fighting Pit Champion in my heart and I hope he gets a rematch against… *checks notes* the Goliath’s dick.

RIP, Xarus— ex-fiancé and stick in the mud. See you in hell.

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Kess’ed Be and catch the next session over at twitch.tv/lochness on July 21st at 7:30CST/8:30EST! AND if you’d like to watch THIS episode, you can find it at the link below: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xyi5JkW-SNY

[black-streak]

Maribat March - Day 27 - Time Travel

Very late but also rather long in comparison to the rest of the month. No shipping here. Next one will be painfully, horribly short because this one is long. Dems the rules.

MM Taglist:

@maribat-march2020 @emo-elaine13

Permanent list

@naoryllis @throneoffirebreathingbitchqueen @my-name-is-michell @maribat-is-lifeblood @dast218 @novicevoice @shizukiryuu @princess-of-fangirls @bigpicklebananatree @pirats-pizzacanninibles @abrx2002 @breemeister @darkthunder1589 @thestressmademedoit @severelyenchantedwonderland @isabellemasen @multi-fandom-freak0221 @fantasyloversblog @bzz75 @cloudiedraws @jardimazul @orbitsvt @gingerdaile @sotheresthatthought @kadmeread @novaloptr @unabashedlyswimmingtimemachine @crazylittlemunchkin @18-fandoms-unite-08

~---~

Well. This was definitely a bad idea. 

Marinette refused to regret it though. After having been thrown back in time ten years, with no way to return at the fun ripe age of 22, she damn well was going to do as she pleased. Not like it really mattered anyways since she was in Gotham now. Or at least it didn't affect Paris. 

As it stood, she had come in contact with about six different people she was sure had their lives irrevocably changed by her.

The first has been Richard Grayson, formally known as Robin, now known as Nightwing. Who she'd had a rather stern conversation with about taking out your frustration on the wrong people. And the sort of damage it could do to their psyche. She knew all about that kind of pain. Explaining why she knew who he was and what had happened had been difficult to push off, but oh well. Once she said the words "time travel" and "Justice League" Dick had panicked over screwed up timelines and ruined futures, but oh well. Damage done. Once upon a time, she might of had an anxiety attack over such things, but now she was just over it.

Next had been Jason. The kid she opened up the eyes of to how much worse things could be. Honestly, that one she almost regretted. She caught him gearing up to run off to Ethiopia nly to grab him by the shoulder and shake some sense into him. That his birth mother hadn't wanted him. Had left him orphaned in a place like Gotham. Would not be thrilled to see him and take him in again should he show up there. And then she showed evidence of the Joker working there. Of his mother's dealings with the clown. Of the sure betrayal to come should he leave here. Of the fact that, drug addicted, absentee mother as she'd been, his pseudo mother had truly loved him. She then dealt with the backlash of his anger and hurt and pain and sent him back to Alfred, making sure the boy told the butler the full extent of what happened and what he had been planning. It was messed up and maybe not even fully true, but it saved his life and she couldn't bring herself to wish she hadn't.

The third had been Bruce himself, who she cornered the way she always wanted to (thank goodness she still had Tikki with her, even if it meant there were two in one timeline now) and gave the scolding of a lifetime. About how there were better ways to give Dick the nudge he needed to move on. How Jason should have taken on his own costume and name. Not been given the ones that meant so very much to Dick and his heritage and past. That it wasn't Bruce's to give away. About not taking his experience with Dick and shoving it into expectations of Jason. They were their own people and shouldn't be compared to one another. That he set Jason up for failure by placing Dick on such a pedestal. It wasn't fair to either of his children. She explained how close he had come to losing Jason all together. He didn't take it well. No parent ever does at first. But once the words were echoed by Alfred, Richard, Jason himself. He started to learn.

Surprisingly, the next was Catwoman. She's not even sure how, but somewhere through the process of bitching about the fucked up Wayne family to one of the only adult pair of ears that might get it, she talked Catwoman out of pursuing Batman anymore. And into pursuing her. Really. She doesn't know how she keeps attracting cats to her. What type of crazy cat lady vibes must she be giving off?

Then there was the scarecrow. Who she probably shouldn't have helped, but by kwami was that costume horrendous. She just had to redesign it. His new one invoked more fear of the power he had than the lack of fashion he held. Once again, not necessarily someone she should've helped, but someone she couldn't help but be drawn into helping anyways. She's sure others would end up with her help soon enough as well.

The last, had been the one she hadn't expected. She never really knew his past. Hadn't known he needed saving before Jason had ever died. He never told her of his life before. 

She found Tim sitting on a fire escape in the middle of the night, watching for the show. Her fire escape to be exact. She didn't recognize him at first, slipping out her window silently and sitting next to the young boy, quietly asking what he was waiting for. The kid jumped, whipping vibrant blue eyes towards her while leaning far away.

She stayed quiet and relaxed, looking away and allowed him to decide what to do. As he apologized and moved to leave, she murmured how he was welcome to use her fire escape whenever he needed. 

It took a few weeks of his visiting and her quiet company before he opened up a little to her. About why he liked to sit outside her window at night. How it was the best view for when Batman and Robin jumped from this rooftop over to the next, flying over his head. Soon he started to open up about more personal subjects. His parents never being in town and his big empty home. His utter lack of friends or ability to connect with others. How he could work his way through high society as though he was born for it, could run a business meeting at the age of twelve, but didn't know how to say hi to Robin the one time he'd encountered him. It took a minute, but soon she realized. This was Tim. The boy who likely wouldn't become Robin now that she'd saved Jason and helped fix up the family dynamic. The kid with no escape from the life he lived beyond sitting on her fire escape and talking to a stranger at night. It was then she made her decision.

She started leaving the window open at night. Even on one's she didn't come out to talk to him. Left snacks and a blanket by the sill for him to decide whether he wanted them or not. When asked, she only shrugged and said he looked small and cold all the time. She was worried. She would stop if he asked her to. He never did. And eventually, she began to find the snacks missing and the blanket moved.

She never pushed him or asked him to come live with her. Just offered her care and a listening ear whenever he might decide he needed it. 

Really, she'd messed up all of their lives for her deeds, but the time continuum would right itself since without the Wayne family that she once knew, she'd never have been sent to the past to begin with. Meaning none of this would ever happen. That in the next ten years, eventually this timeline would end and rip to shreds to never exist. So really, it didn't matter in the end. Might as well see what could've been.

[our-happygirl500-fan]

Okay okay okay okay, I know I’m asking a lot of stuff and probs annoying you. I’m currently reading about the character but what about her and Tim?? Like can I get a run down of everything about them. The good and bad?? Everytime I see things on here it’s either making Tim to be so bad (Anti-Tim ig) or Steph to be so bad and I’m sure they’re both at fault, yea?

No I’m happy to help.

Both Tim and Steph have made mistakes but not in an awful way and more in a ‘these are literal children dealing with serious situations while also trying to be in a relationship with one another’. 

The Steph being bad stuff entirely comes from the fact that she’s a female love interest to a boy who’s one half of a popular mlm ship, she’s made mistakes here and there but they’re human instances where she’s trying to do her best, fandoms often tend to erase or demonise female characters in any any fandom if they are involved in a ship. It’s a sexist habit that comes from reducing a female to only her romantic relationship and ignoring all her other connections and reeks of misogyny. There’s also some slut shaming as Steph was a teen pregnancy & a victim of sexual assault multiple times.

The anti Tim stuff is a bit more complicated, partly it’s a response to sexism where so many fans are sick of the misogyny directed at Steph that they go full throttle the other way or it comes from fans genuinely uncomfortable with Tim’s actions as this is comics and comics are usually written by sexist men which means Tim sometimes takes actions or says something that is not so great.

The important thing to remember about Tim and Steph is that they are each others best friends and they have been through so much together to the point where even if they were not dating they would still be one of the most important relationships the other had.

There is some worry that Tim and Steph feeds into each others complexes 

Tim and Steph both experienced neglect growing up in different ways which makes their attitude to love very different.

Tim's parents were never around most of the time which makes him sort of desperate for love, for validation and most of the time he seems to be of the sort that love is something he can earn if he just does the right thing or achieves the right goal which reflects on how he probably thought if he got good grades or made his parents proud they'd notice him more they'd spend time with him more.

Steph's childhood of neglect I guess you could say came from the sickness of her parents Arthur Brown was abusive to both his wife and daughter and Crystal's drug addiction making her barely able to raise Steph half the time. More often than not it was Steph taking care of the house hold and her mother than any adult looking out for Steph.

With the neglect Steph went through she knew that there was nothing /she/ herself could do to change it, she couldn't magically make her mother quit taking drugs or stop her father from committing crimes by winning an award or behaving well, heck most of her childhood was just trying to keep her and her mum alive so in contrast with Tim who is desperate to receive love Steph is desperate to give love. Because if she's giving love to this person that means they care about her too right? 

This comes across in how easy Steph is willing to poor love into people who are even remotely nice to her like the second Barbara or Bruce stop treating her like shit she's immediately like 'I would die for you'. The second her mother is sober enough to notice her Steph is there being like 'mom I love you I would protect you with my life'. Cass is slightly nice to her? She is now Steph's best friend.

Tim is desperate to receive unconditional affection while Steph is desperate to give unconditional affection which would explain why they are drawn to one another but enough about the meta and onto their actual history.

Steph became a vigilante originally to stop her fathers crimes, the entire point of Spoiler was an abuse victim taking agency back from her abuser and due to Tim being Robin and also investigating the same crimes the two would run into each other multiple times, there was an attraction between the two however neither truly pursued anything due to the fact that Tim was dating another girl and Steph was ‘seeing’ a guy (though the relationship was implied to be unhealthy as he was significantly older, Steph only being around 14 at the time, and showed little in Steph’s actual well being).

However despite the two already being in relationships the two developed keen banter together and quickly began to enjoy the others presence what arguably set then on the path towards a relationship however is when Tim very nearly died and Steph managed to save him at the last second, Tim was so relieved that he kissed Steph sparking a romantic interest from Steph and Tim beginning to realise he had feelings for her.

Steph would then continue fighting crime outside of her fathers crimes as Steph realised that as Spoiler she could help other abuse victims such as herself. Steph’s entire life can be described as falling through the cracks in the system no one caring about the abuse and unsafe situations that she grew up with and Steph’s early journey as Spoiler is her realising that even though no one had cared when she was abused and hurt she could be the person who would care for other people so no one would suffer the way she did. Steph aiming to fight crime meant that she and Tim ran into each other even more working multiple cases together until it eventually culminated into Tim admitting that he had feelings for Steph but due to his loyalty to Batman he could never tell her his secret identity however Steph told him that that was enough for her, the two ended their previous relationships and started dating.

This is actually where a lot of criticism over the relationship is from due to the obvious power imbalance Tim knows every detail of Steph’s life while controlling all information Steph has on him and only lets her interact with Robin. Tim has also been shown to be rather possessive of Steph controlling her interactions with other members of the superhero community and expressing alarm in her spending time with other heroes who are not him.

There is also the fact that for a large part every man Stephanie has ever interacted with have been abusive in some way, her home life was incredibly dangerous due to her mother and fathers friends all being criminals or victims and Steph had to deal with at least two instances of child predators growing up so to many readers it becomes increasingly obvious that Tim might very well be the first man Steph ever interacted with who treated her with human decency and that is why she fell in love with him.

After the relationship started Steph found out that she had become pregnant from her previous relationship and the reader discovers that Steph’s previous boyfriend on top of being awful to her was also using her for sex. Steph tells Tim about the pregnancy fully expecting him to break up with her however Tim states that he is going to be there to support Steph. The two grow even closer as Tim becomes someone for Steph to lean on wearing disguises to take Steph to birthing classes and helps Steph through the process of putting the baby up for adoption. Tim is even there when the child is born.

The incident made Tim and Steph even closer and afterwards the two continue dating and remain close, Steph quickly becomes what could be considered Tim’s safe place as he is able to leave any problems as Tim Drake or Robin away and simply enjoy being with her and during times where Tim is unable to visit Steph he is shown to be tense and disgruntled without the positive emotional outlet however after nearly over a year and a half of dating Steph begins to realise that the dynamic of the relationship is uneven as Tim has complete control and knowledge over her own life while she knows nothing about Tim’s life out of the mask. Steph begins to worry about merely being used and starts openly wishing that Tim would let her be more involved with his life outside of Robin.

Tim meanwhile is beginning his rebellious phase against Batman and Bruce takes actions to try and nip it in the bud as Dick’s rebellious phase ended with Dick leaving Batman for the Titans and Jason’s rebellious phase ended with Jason dead. Bruce attempts to control Tim by using Steph revealing Tim’s secret identity to Tim. After that point Bruce would continually manipulate Steph in a gambit to manipulate Tim and Tim expresses frustration at Bruce using Steph to get to him.

Bruce and Steph’s relationship is incredibly complicated in its own right as Steph has a childhood admiration of Batman as he was the only one who seemed to be able to stop her fathers abuse by putting him in prison. This childhood admiration causes Steph to follow and respect Bruce no matter how many times his actions hurt her. Bruce on the other hand has a lot of issues regarding Steph as Steph reminds him a lot of Jason and Bruce puts a lot of his unresolved issues regarding his dead son on her which as you might assume does not end well for Steph at all.

Outside of Bruce’s meddling however Steph and Tim grow increasingly close no longer having to worry about secret identities the two go on regular dates and are there for each other in every aspect of their lives. However Tim’s father finds out about Robin and forces him to quit and Steph who had been dating Tim ‘batman needs a Robin’ Drake for years was firmly of the belief that ‘Gotham needs a Robin’ at which point Steph herself becomes the fourth Robin though it is heavily implied that once again Bruce is manipulating Steph in order to manipulate Tim into coming back.

Then DC enters its dark ages where they kill off characters left and right and Steph is tortured, raped and killed in a Gotham wide gang war primarily for Bruce angst so that Bruce can go ‘oh god it’s Jason all over again I knew she was girl Jason I knew it’ mean while Tim has what can probably be best described as a mental break down over Steph’s death and the subsequent death of his father and multiple friends. This causes Tim to become cold, cynical and increasingly dark and pessimistic (he has depression).

However Steph comes back to Gotham two years later alive again and it is revealed that Leslie Thompkin’s essentially kidnapped Steph to Africa for two years and faked Steph’s death in order to try and save Steph from being a soldier in Batman’s crusade. Steph was Leslie’s ward for two years but realised that she could literally not stop fighting crime as in Africa Steph literally started dressing up as an African legend and started fighting crime there, eventually convincing Leslie that they needed to go back to Gotham the two returned and Tim was over the moon to see Steph alive kissing her on sight, however Tim realises that he essentially had a break down over Steph death for nothing and expresses resentment over Steph letting him believe that she was dead for two years. Steph who had spent the past to years recovering physically and mentally from the trauma of being tortured for days prior to Leslie faking Steph’s death and Steph essentially not having had a choice in Leslie’s plan to fake her death is just like ‘I don’t know what to tell you buddy’ 

Steph is still Tim’s emotional home, immediately relying on her for emotional support once again and the two are shown to still love each other however the two had changed a great deal over the time they were apart. Steph having had an adult finally care about her well being for the first time in her life grew much more positive into someone who believed in the inherent good in people and in hope while Tim had grown harsh and dark and cynical. The two even joke about how Steph has become an optimist while Tim had become a pessimist. Steph is like a beam of light for Tim who had become increasingly dark and Tim finds himself being both wary of it and drawn to it.

Then Bruce gets back to his old tricks of using Steph to manipulate Tim and gives Steph instructions to challenge Tim in order to improve Tim’s skills as a crime fighter. Steph on Bruce’s orders employs and assassin to fight Tim however the assassin goes to far and Steph is injured trying to protect Tim. Tim realising that Bruce is once again manipulating Steph to get to him as well as having an inherent fear of Steph dying again demands that Steph should not be a vigilante any longer never mind that Steph literally can not stop fighting crime which causes a rift between the two.

The superhero community then believe that Batman is dead and Tim leaves Gotham to prove that Bruce is alive while Tim is gone from Gotham Cass makes Steph the new Batgirl and Steph becomes incredibly close to Barbara and Damian and as Batgirl makes several friends within the masked community no longer having her interactions be controlled by Tim or Bruce. Steph starts coming into her own and building up her self confidence, when Tim returns he is once again upset that Steph is still fighting crime his fear of Steph dying still going strong and acts condescending towards Steph’s attempts to help him however Steph proves herself in sheer level of skill and prowess and Tim accepts her as a vigilante and the new Batgirl accepting that Steph will not die again. Tim then attempts to rekindle their romantic relationship however Steph realises that she had been too dependent on Tim’s love and wishes to improve herself as a person before she even thinks of entering a relationship again. The two remain close friends however Tim expresses attraction towards Steph multiple times (Tim is the horniest little fuck during this time in their lives and Steph is literally out their trying to live her life and better herself as a person and get a university degree it’s hilarious)

If Convergence is to believe the two would always eventually get back together in one way or another the two issues being about their romantic interest in each other and getting back together.

After the reboot happens when they meet again Tim immediately expresses romantic interest in Steph while Steph herself is wary of Tim as in this universe both her mother and her father are criminals who have tried to kill her and Steph has effectively been homeless living in public libraries or where ever she can. It is unknown when but Tim offers Steph a place to live at his apartment and a some point the two eventually enter a romantic relationship.

A lot of fans have criticised this as Steph is entirely financially dependent on Tim for food and shelter and once again Tim holds more power than Steph in the relationship. Also in the rebooted universe Tim is Steph’s only support system as her parents tried to kill her, her father murdered any civilians she was close to in order to hurt her and any connections Steph had before the reboot have had vast amounts of their history erased.

Steph has also been shown to be responsible for a lot of Tim’s mental health as she has to stop him from crossing lines or going off the deep end multiple times it is described as Tim having a tendency of walking a dark path when he is alone. 

Steph and Tim are both presented as each others support systems in current comics and when Tim wanted to leave Gotham in order to research the multiverse Steph went with him as the two rely on each other.

I don’t believe there is a good guy or bad guy in their relationship both Tim and Steph want what’s best for each other but sometimes these views don’t line up which causes conflict but at the end of the day they are two people that care about each other a great deal and whether they are in a relationship or not they will always be one of the most important people in each others lives.

The relationship is criticised by the fandom as fans either fetishise mlm relationships and are angry at Steph ‘getting in the way’ an unfortunate trend in all fandoms and on the other side many are tired of female characters being reduced to their romantic relationships.

TimSteph is a cute ship with a deep connection and a lot of history proving that they care about each other a great deal but sexism and misogyny are things that exist especially in fandom spaces and that creates a nightmare.

[captain-ozone]

okay okay, guys, so I know we’ve seen HP/Batman and ATLA/Batman mashups and crossovers, with numerous discussions about which Houses the Batfam would be Sorted into as well as which elements they would bend. 

I raise you: the Batfam in the world of The Magnus Archives. Which Fear Entities might they serve? Which would they abhor? Which might they have been victims to? 

Let’s discuss. 

(If you’re unfamiliar with The Magnus Archives, it’s a horror/tragedy podcast. Highly recommend. For context, though, here’s some info on the Entities I’m talking about)

Bruce: He’d likely develop an association with The Web, The Eye, or possibly The Dark with an absolute loathing of The Corruption, The Extinction, The Desolation, and, of course, The End. He fights to keep these last four entities out of Gotham while utilizing his association with remarkably contradictory Entities (i.e. The Eye and The Dark) as both a detective and a cowled vigilante. If anyone could pull it off, he could. And does. I mean, Bruce goes out of his way to investigate and reveal corruption, crime, and other plots against the good people of Gotham, which The Eye loves, AND he skulks in the shadows and makes common criminals piss themselves when he comes to get them, all of which The Dark would thrive on. In any case, I imagine he’d resent any favor given to him by ANY of the Entities. The Hunt enjoys Bruce, too, as it would all the members of the superhero community, actually, in some capacity. Another point for The Web? For all the plans and contingencies he makes, he never plans to make a family. Kids just fall in his lap, somehow in the right place and the right time. The Web undoubtedly has a blast with Bruce. It gives him all sorts of plots to unravel while ultimately playing him like a fiddle.

Dick: THE VAST OMG. He’d both be a victim and servant, and I will not take criticism on this point. The Vast is fickle, I think, and Dick would be a perfect plaything for it. As we all know, this poor boy lost his parents due to a fall from the trapeze, and he might have fallen himself, had things been different (*cough cough* I see you, Mother of Puppets). I love fics that put Dick’s love of heights at odds with his trauma (again providing some evidence for a love-hate relationship with this particular Entity), but of course, Dick overcomes the trauma associated with his parents’ fall and rarely leaves his feet on the ground. Heights and open spaces are his heroin. They’re in his blood. He shares this love with the Robins who follow in his footsteps as well as other colleagues in the superhero community. The Vast feeds off their initial fear of heights/grappling/free-falling, or perhaps each heart-stopping reaction they have when they watch Dick do all these wild acrobatic things from high heights. But The Vast isn’t just about heights, is it? It also has to do with a fear of falling into obscurity or feeling insignificant in the grand scheme of things. And we also know Dick has this fear in ABUNDANCE (see as, his oftentimes rocky relationship with his mentor, as well as his desire to be That Shoulder To Lean On in literally every team he’s been a part of). So. Yes. The Vast. 

Babs: THE EYE. Her code name is Oracle. She oversees the entire Batfam operation. And is also an information hub for THE BIRDS OF PREY AND THE JUSTICE LEAGUE. Like???? This needs no explanation or further discussion.

Jason: Oh god. This boy. Okay. So. He is fascinating, and he’d be fascinating to pretty much every Entity out there, for both good and bad reasons, too. They’d have a field day with him. Let’s look at his death first. He technically escaped The End as well as The Corruption and The Buried when he was resurrected, bodily restored, and forced to dig his way out of his grave. I cannot decide if these three Entities would target him specifically afterwards for having escaped their clutches or if they would be sated knowing how afraid he was at the time of his resurrection. Either way. The Web, also, would have had a hand in pretty much every convoluted part of DC’s many Crises, one of which triggered Jason’s resurrection in the first place. BUT WAIT THAT IS NOT ALL. Jason’s been touched by The Spiral (because who else would the Joker serve???? Actually... lies. I might argue the Joker shakes hands with The Stranger sometimes too, but idk how well those Entities would work together). Outside of his death at the hands of an avatar of The Spiral/The Stranger (which Jason would experience intense fear/loathing toward), the Lazarus Pit is probably a co-instrument of The End (because the fear of death does drive men to seek immortality, does it not?) and The Slaughter (for obvious reasons). During his crime-lord phase, he may have some association with The Hunt and The Desolation in addition to The Slaughter. The Flesh would have loved his duffle bag of heads. Prior to forming a team of Outlaws, he’s likely also been touched by The Lonely. And ALL THIS after being mentored by someone who has an association with The Eye/The Web/The Dark. And having a brother so closely tied to The Vast. In the end, after the Pit Madness has worn off, Jason might have unintentionally found himself an avatar of The End, but I imagine all of the Entities would love or hate him (and possibly even consider him with the same fondness they would a pet that gets passed around between distant family members). He...has a unique relationship with each of them, in any case. 

Tim: WEB TIM WEB TIM WEB TIM WEB TIM. This boy was born to serve The Web. Though he very nearly fell prey to The Lonely, on account of his parents’ neglect. Prior to becoming Robin, he had to fight every day to keep himself from being consumed by it. Continuously lying and tricking his caretakers (as well as his parents) into believing he was alright by himself specifically to sneak out and get pictures of Batman was what initially drew The Web to him. After becoming Robin? Whoooo boy. He had free reign and excelled as a master strategist and manipulator. He violently rejects The Lonely, no matter how often it tries to draw him back.

Cass: Like Tim, she’s been touched by The Lonely. Unlike Tim, I like to think she’s made her peace with it and has learned to live in harmony with the mark it left behind. I mean, her father isolated her for most of her childhood and denied her the opportunity to learn how to speak and read. She had no connection to anyone beyond that. The Lonely adored her. Once choosing to join Bruce, she casts off her larger association with The Lonely, obviously, and learns to become a part of a family. Unlike the others in the family, though, she does not serve any other Entity and makes a point not to get too close to any of them, though she does have an uncanny understanding of each of them (and can identify their avatars, victims, and associated artifacts on sight), which puts her closer to The Eye than she likes to acknowledge. Her hatred of The End surpasses Bruce’s.

Stephanie: she’s the hardest for me to decide upon. Tbh, she’s probably a lot like Georgie Barker in TMA. Perhaps her shameless lack of fear/ability to focus beyond her fears makes her uninteresting to the Entities, maybe??? Will come back to her later. And will definitely accept any further thoughts on her.

Damian: The League of Assassins is all about new world order, right? Ra’s al Ghul’s main motivation is to save the world...while also destroying a good portion of it to do so. So we know Damian has grown up around ideals of The Extinction, The End, and The Desolation. After meeting Bruce and moving in to Wayne Manor, it’s hard to shake any loyalty to these Entities. His death and resurrection, like Jason’s, ties him further to The End, but after meeting Jon Kent, Colin Wilkes, Maya Ducard (etc etc) and actually allowing himself the opportunity to be a kid, he doesn’t really serve any Entity, does he? I mean, he probably defers to Bruce’s loyalties in the beginning and continues to do so while learning from his other family members, but he’s probably made no such commitments to any of the Entities himself. Dick’s tie to The Vast may have some impact on him, especially considering how close Dick and Damian are, but I doubt The Vast would have an interest in Damian solely because of it. The kid’s personality and The Vast don’t mesh. I bet Damian may, later, genuinely follow in his father’s footsteps and be a dichotomy by allying himself with The Eye and The Dark. For now, though, he’s a kid and deserves freedom from any Fear Gods.

Duke: you see the state the Joker’s toxin left this kid’s parents in?? Victim of The Spiral/The Stranger, without a doubt. I’m not as up-to-date on his current arc, unfortunately, so I’m not sure which Entity he would end up leaning toward outside of The Eye (by association to the others and due to his own detective skills) but his powers with light put him at distinct odds with The Dark. 

[icarialex]

Discord Threads

Who: Zoey Katz and Kassandra West @kassmeifyoucan​

When: February 12th

Where: Little Icaria, Beach, then Zoey’s doorstep

What: Zoey takes Kassandra out on a date. Before Robin beats Kassandra up and she shows up to Zoey’s a bloody mess.

Zoey

Once they were seated, Zoey decided to reply to some things Kass said as they were walking. “Amaze you? By shapeshifting? It’s not really something I worked hard to obtain. I was just born with it. Comes with the mom being Demeter thing,” she said with a shrug of her shoulders. Zoey was happy to talk about her mother. While the two weren’t close, she had a better relationship than many others on the isle. The blonde understood that being a Goddess and a parent didn’t really blend well. Still, she appreciated that her mother seemed to try and check in on her when she could. Quickly getting tired of the idea of sitting across from Kassandra, the blonde moved to sit on her side of the booth and just quickly maneuvered the table settings to accommodate what she wanted. She’d never understood why it was customary for people to sit that way. Dates were supposed to be an intimate affair. Sitting across made conversation easy, but seriously limited touching. She’d rather just turn her body slightly while talking. “Oh,” she asked playfully as she reached for her glass of water that was just placed at their table. “Is that because only you want to see me naked or are you protecting my honor,” she asked over the rim of the glass before taking a sip to hide her smirk slightly. 

.

Now that they were next to each other again, Zoey reached for Kass’ hand and started absentmindedly playing with her fingers. “Me? No, not really,” she said with a shrug. “I stopped by my parents’ house this week for dinner. Even though we literally live less than eight minutes away from each other, they still think me having my own apartment puts me in a whole new world or something.” The illustrator affectionately rolled her eyes as she talked about her dad and step mother. They were such a silly duo, and anyone that met them could see where Zoey got her quirky and affectionate nature from. “I don’t know if I’d call having a woman wrapped in a bedsheet boring, but hey, if that’s your boring I’d hate to see you having a wild time.” She made sure to keep a smile on her face as she made light of the situation. Although it made something stir in her abdomen, she could deal with it more easily now that the two of them weren’t being so odd anymore. 

“Tonight? You seem to give me the lead on most things,” she retorted. Fortunately, she didn’t need to look at the menu really to know what was best on it. She was a big fan of Little Icaria and had been more times than she could count. It was also her dad’s favorite place to take her since it opened. When their waiter returned, she smiled at him as she asked, “Can we get a bottle of the Pinot noir please? Also, I’m going to have the sea bass, and this beautiful woman is going to have the lamb. Lamb medium please, and the sids that they come with is great.” With that put in, she was happy to see him take away their menus. Since she was paying, she didn’t need Kass looking at prices and then getting all unnecessarily self conscious. “I’d order appetizers, but seriously, the plates are such a nice size here that we will not finish our main dishes if I did.”

Kassandra

Kassandra tried not to feel some sort of jealousy at the way Zoey could so easily talk about her Godly parent. Family, really. Not once had Kass ever even mentioned her father to Zoey. Not out of hiding, just out of not really seeing the point. Okay... Maybe a little bit out of hiding. Part of her wanted to say something about her father, give some more common ground to bond over but before she could even say anything, Zoey was doing the unthinkable. The brunette blinked slowly in shock as her friend decided that sitting across from her just wouldn't do. Now she was sitting next to her, their legs touching. As if on instinct, or maybe because she didn't know what to do with it, she moved her right arm so it was laying along the back of the seat. "Hi there." Gods. Who the fuck said that after something as innocent as just sitting closer to someone. Grabbing for her water, she began to drink from it greedily. That is until Zoey asked her if she wanted to see her naked. Kassandra's eyes went wide, almost slamming the cup down as she choked, water going down the wrong pipe for a moment. "The uh... The choice of who sees you naked is uh... Up to you." She  managed to squeak out, clearing her throat with a well-timed cough.

It didn't take long for Zoey to do that thing where she got bored and needed to do something with her hands, Kassandra being brought out of her panic to only fly straight into another wall. The blonde had now acquired her hand and was playing with her fingers causing Kass to bite her lower lip. Instead of thinking about how much her heart was pounding or how ridiculous she was being for getting nervous over absolutely nothing, she tried to focus on Zoey talking so freely about her parents. Once again she wanted to say something about her mother or even Kratos but it was just hard to get the words out. None of them seemed right enough. Or happy enough. Once again, Kass wasn't prepared for the mental whiplash as Zoey talked so nonchalantly about the woman that she'd seen in her room a while back. Clearing her throat once more, she shrugged. "She wasn't boring. That was just... Not memorable." Eyes closed in a wince, ducking her head for a moment. "That sounds awful. I just mean... She wasn't meant to be anything more than a.... Nevermind. I'm just digging myself a deeper hole."

Letting out a deep breath that she didn't realize she'd been holding, Kassandra watched with a slightly shocked expression as Zoey ordered for them both. Sure, she'd offered the idea up to her on a silver platter but Zoey didn't even really look at the damned menu. She must take people out to dinner often. Which, of course meant that this wasn't a special occurrence. This was just something that made Zoey... Zoey. "I'm excited to eat the food. I trust your judgement." For a moment she stayed silent, mind wandering off to other things until she tuned back into the woman sitting next to her. "My uh... My dad likes to joke about how he blessed me with my gifts." She inhaled sharply, pushing past the uncomfortable feeling swirling in her gut. "Honestly, the strength is a pretty nice thing to have as a girl. Especially growing up where I did. My mom never really knew how to deal with the fact that I was super strong. She wanted me to hide it so I did. Wasn't allowed to play sports because she didn't want me hurting the other girls. I snuck them though... Until I broke Spencer's leg and then that kind of stopped." Kassandra looked down at the table, focusing on the napkins and the silverware. "Sorry if I'm not good with talking about my parents. Mom isn't uh... Anyway. And my dad is kind of busy. Ya know... Being a God and all. You might have heard of him? Kratos." Somehow, telling Zoey who her father was didn't feel nearly as scary as it did when she had to tell her boss. "He's kinda cool. Kind of a dick too. Guess that's where I get it from."

Zoey

When Kassandra started nearly coughing, blue eyes went wide as she tried to rub her back. Honestly, she should probably feel bad, but she didn’t. Getting a reaction out of the woman who so often tried to play it cool was fun. She also had no other way of learning if any of the confusing feelings she was feeling were returned. Well, unless Kassandra decided to just broach the subject which she doubted. From what she’d learned of the woman so far, that didn’t seem likely. “Mmm — that it is, and me asking you if you would want to be the one who saw me or just want to defend my honor wouldn’t take away that choice,” she agreed with a nod once she was sure her friend was done choking. “But you mentioned how you might feel which has me curious about what’s going through that pretty head of yours.” Complimenting Kass was becoming easier and easier for Zoey. Words of affirmation were always easy for her in regards to anyone she cared about. 

.

People sleeping around for fun was not an unknown concept to Zoey, and she didn’t judge it. Just because it wasn’t something for her didn’t mean that she thought it was wrong. The blonde just knew herself well. Sex wasn’t something she held in a high regard, and she needed to feel something for someone in order to even contemplate going there. Although, her thoughts towards the act were wavering due to the thoughts plaguing her mind lately were changing, and it had everything to do with the person sitting next to her. “You’re not digging yourself into anything with me,” she said gently as she absentmindedly drew patterns on Kass’ palm. “I don’t judge sleeping around. If that’s something you can do, then awesome. If it makes you happy, then who am I to judge? I just know myself to know I can’t because I am not someone who gets sexual unless I have a connection with someone. Doesn’t make my way of seeing things better than yours or worse. We’re just different.” Zoey hoped that explaining the way she thought about it would stop Kass from thinking it was in any way horrible or shady.

The waiter brought out their bottle of wine quickly and poured them each a glass before disappearing again. “My dad brings me here whenever he wants to go out to dinner. It’s why I’ve tried just about everything,” she said with a light laugh. “His philosophy is that he has to try everything once, so that makes tackling menus a game of sorts until we’ve covered it all. I’ve never ordered for someone though, so hopefully I did okay. We can also just pick at each other’s food since the portions are so big to get a bit of everything if you want.” Zoey didn’t really know the protocol for these things, but she was just going off instinct. Even if Kass didn’t tell her if she didn’t like something, she could rely on her observation skills to figure it out and adjust. “You have enhanced strength,” she asked curiously as she learned more about the woman besides her. “I will officially never feel bad about sitting on your lap or jumping on you.” The illustrator taking leaping jumps to greet people she really cared for wasn’t new. At least she knew with Kass that she wouldn’t have to worry about toppling them both to the floor. “I can’t imagine what it was like growing up in a world where you had to be careful with powers since I grew up here. I’m glad you eventually found your way here though so you can just be yourself. That has to be less stressful.” While her shifting had gotten her trapped in the zoo a few times, that was a very mild consequence in comparison to what could happen outside of Icaria. “School covered a ton of theGods, so yes, I’m familiar with your dad,” she answered with a smile. However, it quickly turned into a frown at Kass’ following words. “You’re not that. You’re sweet, a little awkward, and really silly when you want to show that side of yourself. I really like you, and who you are,” she said with a shrug.

Kassandra

Green eyes found blue as Zoey responded to her with such earnest and honest words. And then her brain melted as she realized that the blonde said that she really liked her. Her mouth went dry and all sensible thought left the damned window as she just held her gaze for a moment that probably stretched on far longer than most would deem acceptable among just friends. "I uh... Thanks, Zoey. It means a lot. I just don't really feel comfortable around people. Not anymore. But with you, I don't know... It's different. You're different." Kassandra's eyes went wide, squeezing Zoey's hand for a moment. "I don't mean that in a bad way! I just meant, like, you make me feel like I can be the me that... That I haven't been able to be in a very, very long time. I actually, uh--I kind of forgot she existed for a while." She wasn't even remotely about to go into how that girl had basically been dead in the water for a decade, not really wanting to ruin this date not date that they were on. Date. Her mind drifted back to the earlier bit of the conversation that had kind of gotten broken away from when Zoey asked about how she felt with her being naked due to her shifting. Everything went blank for a moment, not even realizing she'd started speaking until it was too late.

"I'm pretty sure that if I ever saw you naked, I'd short circuit. Have you seen you?" Her brain slowly caught up with her words, thankful that Zoey couldn't see the hand that was resting on the back of the booth as it was now gripping the material tightly. "I definitely now see what you mean by awkward." She wanted to facepalm but one hand was gripping the booth and the other was currently being held by Zoey, trying to not melt with how she was drawing random shapes and patterns against her skin. "I'm glad I found my way here too. The place is growing on me. And, well...." Kassandra trailed off, her other hand that had been trying to maintain a grip on her sanity moved of its own free-will and found itself placed lightly on Zoey's upper back, gentle circles being rubbed. "You kind of were the reason for all of that. So thank you." She smiled gently, far too gently for her liking, and quickly moved her hand back to its previous positioning. Part of her wanted to down the wine that was on the table and the other part of her wanted to actually give her full and undivided attention to Zoey without anything fogging her mind. The wine remained untouched.

Zoey

Kass’ words had an effect on Zoey, and she was trying very hard to keep it under wraps. Acting on those feelings without even fully understanding what they meant wasn’t smart. Plus, if she did and messed up such a feeling of comfort for her friend, she’d feel terrible. Still, her blue eyes couldn’t help themselves as her eyes looked down towards Kassandra’s lips for a millisecond longer than could be passed as innocent before snapping back up. Words still couldn’t leave her lips which only made the air grow thicker because those green eyes weren’t helping. Never someone to get lost in the physical, Zoey felt herself being drawn further into a space she didn’t understand. Luckily, the waiter chose that moment to bring their food down, and she was thankful. She had no idea how that would have gone, and she needed a moment to catch her breath. After thanking him, she turned towards Kass again. “I’m happy I do that for you, but don’t think this is one sided. You make me very happy. My favorite days lately are the ones where I run into you, or when you find some excuse to come by my shop. You’re different to me, and I guess our different goes together.” Zoey couldn’t even explain it. Could she draw it? Probably, but words? Those weren’t always her best friends.

“Why would you short circuit,” she asked quietly as she spread the napkin out on her lap. She needed to understand if it was just because she was beautiful, or because it was her. That was a large distinction. “I know I’m attractive, but you there are attractive women everywhere, and you’re too smooth typically to short circuit. So, why?” Where her courage was coming from, she didn’t know. It wasn’t like she’d even touched her own glass of wine. She was too busy focusing on the company besides her to even think about it. 

Regrettably, she released the hand she was toying with and moved to work on her fish. There were many bones that needed to be taken out after all if Kass was going to try some. “I find your awkward endearing, if that helps,” she said with a giggle while working on the task at hand. “You don’t have to thank me. You’ve made this place feel even more like home which I didn’t think was possible, so we’re both happy. Now,” she started as she took a piece of fish with her fork before turning towards Kass. “You have to try this. I can’t believe you’ve been in Greece and haven’t tried our seafood. It’s criminal, Kass.”

Kassandra

Did Zoey just... No. No definitely not. She'd clearly seen things. Licking her lips, she was thankful for the waiter showing up at the perfectly imperfect time to bring them their ordered food. As she stared down at her plate, she felt her cheeks heat up, bringing her hands back to her sides in order to grab at the silverware. Part of her began to panic as she looked at the food that was waiting to be eaten, knowing that Zoey would cackle when she told her why she looked so awkward. Luckily for her, the blonde decided to speak up about--Wait. Oh no. Not luckily. Oh Gods. Her cheeks were blushing a deeper shade of crimson once more, fingers tightening on the silverware so much so that she felt them wince beneath her grip. Placing them down as gently as possible on the table, Kass let her hands go to rest in her lap. Like always whenever she got nervous or antsy, she began to play with her fingers, staring down at her lap in thought. She didn't know why this always happened when she was around Zoey. Granted, if she really allowed herself to truly go there, she'd figure it out quick enough. But something in her wasn't ready to admit it, definitely not out loud and certainly not in her own head. Not yet, anyway. So she smiled warmly at Zoey, the facial expression turning into a cocky smirk as she wrapped her hand around Zoey's and leaned over to take the offered fish meat off of the fork. Logically she knew she could have just reached for the fork and taken it into her own hand but this was much more tempting. Pulling away and chewing the food, she looked at Zoey thoughtfully as she swallowed. "I'm sorry that I'm a horrible human being. I will be sure to turn myself into the police under the crime of not ever having seafood in my life." She held up two fingers in a mock 'scout's honor' knowing full well that wasn't the hand signal.

Leaning back so she wasn't invading Zoey's space as much, she took a hold of her glass of wine and almost downed the entire thing. Hopefully Zoey wouldn't notice the absolutely insane move but given the fact that she could feel the heat of her gaze, it was safe to say she'd seen it all. And to make matters worse, just because she couldn't quite put a finger on how she felt towards the blonde didn't mean that her brain wouldn't fuck her over at every little turn. Which is why she started talking. Again. "I realized I never answered your question from earlier. But to answer it now... You're you, Zoey." Her words came out in a smaller voice than she would have expected it to. "There could be a thousand attractive women around and... And none of them would be you." After a moment where everything felt too real and she realized that everything had just stopped in their little pocket of the restaurant did she offer up an awkward chuckle. "Anybody else who didn't think the same is lying." There. Make it seem like some obvious thing that everyone else thought of. Yeah, that's super believable. She could slap herself. For fucks sake. Instead of doing that she chose to focus back on the food that awaited her, picking up at her utensils once more. Her brow furrowed, nose crinkling cutely as she stared down at the dish. "In other news, I regret to inform you but I grew up for the first half of my life being a vegetarian. So uh--I don't exactly know how to eat this." She quickly held up a fork. "I eat meat now! I just, ya know--its always been like. Oh look a burger. Oh look, chicken nuggies. Things that make sense and don't require previous knowledge other than open mouth and chew."

Zoey

If Zoey’s eyes didn’t become a darker blue due to the woman’s actions, she’d be surprised because she felt everything within her become thicker. Perhaps that wasn’t a word many would use in the situation, but it was the only one that made sense. An overwhelming feeling of desire became like a fog that covered the rest of her senses and mind which made it very hard to focus on anything else. Her eyes wanted to drift again, and once again she wasn’t successful at stopping their trajectory, but she did move them up once again quicker. “You’re a tease,” slipped past her lips before she even realized, but she didn’t regret the words when her ears picked up what she had said. How could the woman not see the effect she was having on the illustrator? The deeper breathing, glances, and comments were going to give her away sooner or later. Not to mention the date that she’d somehow manage to slyly get. “I’m glad you’re experiencing it with me then,” she replied honestly once the lust induced fog cleared a bit. “Although, turning yourself in won’t be necessary. I’ll take responsibility for you and correct this atrocity at once.” Playful was always an easier territory for the two of them. It seemed to lead to less trouble. 

Zoey noticed how quickly Kass seemed to drink her wine, but didn’t comment because she went through her own glass a little quickly. She then poured them another. With all the food around them, she knew she wouldn’t feel it too terribly. Thankfully she’d put down the wine bottle before the other woman spoke again because if she hadn’t, she was positive that it would have been dropped. Her food was forgotten for the moment as she shifted her body, so she was almost completely facing Kassandra. “Many people don’t see what you do, and I’m happy they don’t. If they did, what you tried to do would be successful. I’d actually believe your attempt to shrug it off as something less important than it is.” The blonde knew that if she said more, that she would genuinely get emotional or spill her own feelings that she didn’t make sense of herself yet. Zoey almost panicked at the mention of not eating meat until Kass clarified. Then, an endearing smile appeared on her face. “Cut the meat similar to a steak. The big piece that’s like hanging away from the bone is the best. Promise, there isn’t a wrong way to eat it. I won’t even judge if you picked up the bone and ate it like a wing,” she promised with a smile.

Kassandra

"Babe, you haven't experienced the kind of tease I can be." Kassandra muttered under her breath before nodding decisively and looking at the dish. "Alright I'll try. But if I eat it weird... Blame my mother." With a little awkwardness she began to cut the lamb in a slightly horrific manner and grumbled softly to herself. "Damn thing..." Finally after too many painstakingly long seconds, she got a decent size bite and chewed on it thoughtfully. "Well, I have to say that you've really outdone yourself on this whole ordering thing. This is actually really good." For a while she just ate her food in silence, sneaking glances at the other woman. She wasn't too terribly hungry after the day of nerves, trying to get up the gumption to actually talk to Zoey. Of course she'd offered up some of her food for Zoey to take, happy to return the sentiment. Now she was sipping at her water, refusing to go any further down wine lane. She'd just finished pushing the plate away, one hand on her stomach and the other having returned to the back of the booth. She was about to start talking about the rest of their evening when she noticed that Zoey had some wine on her upper lip.

For what wouldn't be the last time that night, Kassandra's body reacted of its own accord. Without even thinking, she turned her body more towards Zoey, her full attention to those lips that she desperately found herself wanting to kiss more and more. The hand that had been resting on her stomach moved toward's the other woman's face. "Hey you uh... You've got..." Kass trailed off, biting her own bottom lip in concentration as she brought the pad of her thumb up to trace along the curve of Zoey's lip, effectively getting the wine. Her breath hitched as she realized what she'd just done, hand frozen just a few inches away from Zoey's face. Someone cleared their throat, snapping her out of her trance. It was the waiter, asking if they wanted anything to go. "O-oh. Uh, yeah that'd be great. Just a second, I can pay for dinner." And just like that, whatever moment had been happening or almost happened was broken as Kass moved away to reach into her back pocket to grab for her wallet, effectively putting space between her and the woman that was causing all reasonable thought to leave her body.

Zoey

At Kass’ words, Zoey felt her body heat up and fill with anticipation all at the same time. “What if I wanted to experience it,” she said in a bit of a challenge. The artist had no idea what was happening, but she wasn’t overthinking it. All she knew was that she wouldn’t regret it since it seemed she wasn’t navigating the confusing waters alone. If she was, Kass would have let her down easily by now. At least, Zoey thought so. As the dinner kept on, she offered up more bits of her fish to the woman beside her. They were comfortable around each other, and it was different. Yes, she and Theo had always been comfortable, but he was more of her best friend. The atmosphere she was in during dinner was one with an undercurrent of wanting which she wasn’t used to and was growing to like. It was exciting, and she liked not feeling bashful as she took in the woman beside her, “I’m glad you like it.” 

When Kass touched her lip, Zoey felt her breathing stop for a moment. Actually, she was positive every part of her froze. Without even thinking, her lips puckered slightly to kiss the finger. Noticing that the hand stopped in midair, the illustrator reached for it and was about to tug it towards her to pull Kass forward when they were interrupted. She didn’t know whether to groan or be thankful that they didn’t share a kiss in the middle of Little Icaria, but she took the moment to regather herself for what felt like the millionth time. A smirk did appear on her face when she heard the waiter say the bill had been taken care of. He thanked her by calling her Ms. Katz as he handed her the receipt to sign. “I handed my card to the hostess when we got here,” she said without looking up as she calculated the tip to answer the silent question. “I asked you out, so I pay. That’s how it goes before you argue, and unless you have a creative way to shut me up, I’m quite stubborn.” Flirting was so easy with Kass which was weird. Zoey was sweet, funny, and caring, but smooth was not an adjective she’d use. Yet, there she was.

When their to go boxes were returned to them, Zoey took the brown bag and stood up from the booth. “Are you ready, darling,” she asked as she offered her hand to the woman she was struggling to continue thinking of as a friend.

Kassandra

'What if I wanted to experience it'. Her mind was a wreck. Zoey just kept saying and doing things that were slowly killing her. And what's worse is that she didn't know how to take it. On one hand, Zoey could just be a really easy-going flirt. And on the other? Zoey could actually be feeling whatever tension there was that had filled up this whole damned restaurant. Either way, Kassandra was trying desperately to find some sort of balance. It was barely possible, since just looking at Zoey made her want to throw all rational thought out the mother-fucking window and just kiss her until she was breathless and whimpering her name. Swallowing thickly, Kassandra tuned back into the present, brought back to her senses by Zoey standing up from the booth and offering her hand. Had... Had she just called her darling? The brunette blinked and took the offered hand as she scooted out of the booth. She was sure she'd missed something else that was important from the conversation but honestly, after what she'd said earlier? Everything else was a blissful blur.

As they began the walk towards the Inn, Kassandra kept quiet for as long as she could manage, just giving small squeezes to Zoey's hand to let her know that she was still mentally present enough to acknowledge her. It wasn't that she couldn't talk. She just was afraid of what she might fucking say if she did decide to open her mouth. Everything inside of her was screaming at her to do two very different things. Part of her wanted to invite Zoey to her room and have her way with her for the rest of the evening. The part of her that was definitely winning wanted to just do something as equally dumb--like hold her hand and just talk to her until the wee hours of the morning. Like some kind of fucking sap. No. Whatever was happening, or trying to happen, she couldn't let it continue. Right? She didn't do getting hurt. And whatever was happening would definitely lead to heartbreak. Be it her own or Zoey's. And she honestly didn't know if she could handle hurting the other girl. The problem with that is that's what she always did. She ruined people.

Once they got to the Inn, Kassandra took the leftovers out of Zoey's hands. "I'll be right back. Don't go anywhere." She teased before doing another unthinkable, leaning down and kissing Zoey on the cheek. As she turned around, her eyes widened. Why the fuck are you doing this to yourself, Kassandra. She's probably just flirty with everyone and this doesn't mean anything. Do not even remotely think about fa--nope. No. She wasn't going to even think that word. No way. As she made her way into her room, she put the food into her mini-fridge and checked on her puppy. He was fast asleep and she didn't have the heart to wake him. It had only been about an hour and a half since she'd left so he'd be fine. Her eyes fell on a hard-case, wondering if this was really a good idea. Without thinking too long about it, Kassandra grabbed her car keys off the dresser and then grabbed the case, quickly exiting her room. Going out the back entrance, she loaded her car with the item and closed the trunk before getting inside and driving out to the front to where Zoey was waiting. "Shall we?"

Zoey

“Oh yes, because I’m just going to bolt on you,” she teased. Anything else that she was thinking of replying with fell dead on her lips due to the kiss on her cheek. Kass so far didn’t initiate affection, which didn’t bother Zoey, but then she did something to take her completely off guard. It left her only being able to follow the woman with her eyes as she went to her room, which only gave her something equally as problematic to focus on. The blonde wasn’t the type of girl to focus on someone’s butt, yet, there she was staring. Fortunately, Kassandra didn’t turn around. That would have caused her to blush profusely. 

The more time she spent around Kass, the more positive she was of her feelings. Emotionally she knew she was drawn, but the physical aspect was new. Then again, it had been a long time since she’d had a crush on anyone. After her break up, she didn’t really allow herself to go there. Not because she didn’t want to or was hurt, but because she wanted to learn more about herself before trying anything with anyone else. Then, whatever was happening decided to slap her in the face. Fortunately, she was taken out of her inner musings when a car pulled up and Kass got her attention. “And you told me not to go anywhere. You have a get away car and everything,” she teased as she opened the passenger door and slipped in.

“You do know we could have walked,” she teased lightly. Zoey herself didn’t even have a car. The island was so small she never needed one. Her father taught her how to drive since it was apparently a right of passage, but other than practicing every so often, she never used the skill. Since they were heading to the beach, the blonde reached for the bottom of her shirt and lifted it up over her head. She shook her hair out of the braid she had it in and relaxed against the seat. “I have a blanket in my bag. I actually am totally one of those girls that has just about everything in her purse.” It was why she carried what looked more like a satchel or knapsack than a traditional purse.

Kassandra

"I know we could have walked but the idea of you walking back to your place after being in the ocean doesn't really sit right with me. Hence, car." She didn't add the fact that it was much easier to lug around a certain item via a car than on her shoulders. Kass put the car in gear and pulled out of the parking lot, one hand on the gearshift and the other on the steering wheel. She found herself restricting her movement, not allowing herself to reach over and grab the other woman's hand. This was getting far too close into dating territory, or at least a variation of that and well, Kassandra didn't do that anymore.It didn't take long to make it to the beach, after all, they were on a relatively small island. When Kassandra originally thought of Icaria, she had imagined it being much larger. This? This wasn't at all to the scale she'd whipped up in her head. But in all honesty? It was better.

As they pulled up into a parking spot, Kassandra turned off the car and got out to quickly jog over to Zoey's car door, opening it. "It's the least I can do for the girl that wined and dined me. Also... I'm going to get something out of my trunk and you're not gonna look okay? I promise you it'll be worth your while. Just... Stay here..." Kassandra positioned Zoey so she was staring out towards the ocean before going over to the trunk and opening up the case, pulling out the instrument and strapping it to her back. Walking back over to Zoey, Kass gently placed her hands over the blonde's eyes as her torso pressed up against the blonde's back. "So.. While you go out in the ocean and get incredibly wet, I'm going to stay on the sand. Where its dry and isn't an abyss of death." She didn't dare let her mind focus on how exactly she'd started out that sentence.

Removing her hands, she walked around to stand in front of Zoey, curling her finger in a 'come hither' motion. "And don't worry about me getting bored. I've got something to keep me company in the meantime. Besides, I'll start a fire so you'll be nice and warm when you're ready to come out." Kassandra took this time to sling her guitar into view. Green eyes found blue for a moment, a faint blush spreading over her cheeks. "Before you even remotely say something about me being adorable--hush. I learned how to play when I was younger by the principle at my school. Between that and choir, it was pretty much all my mom would let me do." Instead of waiting for Zoey to start towards her, Kassandra reached forward and grabbed onto the blonde's hand. Interlacing their fingers together, she began to walk backwards for a couple steps, pulling Zoey towards her for a moment until she turned to face the ocean.

Zoey

Zoey shook her head playfully as she got out of the car. “If that impresses you, then I need to have a serious talk with the other people who have taken you out on dates,” she said in mock seriousness. What she’d done wasn’t even that big of a deal. Honestly, she was a bit annoyed with her impulsiveness. If she’d thought things through, it could have been better. Although, the two of them always seemed to have fun together, so it didn’t bother her too much. As Kass went to the trunk, Zoey leaned against the hood of the car by holding her wait up against her palms as she gazed at the ocean. She followed orders even though she was very tempted not to. 

When she was guided towards Kass and then felt the woman press into her back, she felt her body temperature skyrocket. Instead of letting herself feel frazzled, she instead reached back slightly just to squeeze the woman’s hips slightly and pull even the slightest bit closer. “Abyss of death is a little dramatic,” she teased lightly. “Also, you think very highly of my self control if you think I will be able to resist making you wet too.” If innuendo was the game they were going to play, then she’d have to keep up. It was exciting and frustrating. While she had no idea if she’d make a fool of herself, for some reason she didn’t worry about that much. She knew any teasing that came from Kass would be playful, or apparently aimed at making her flustered.

When the woman finally moved to stand in front of her and beckoned her over, Zoey just smirked and moved to remove her shorts first. When she was left in just her bikini, she finally obliged and moved towards the woman. Although, blue eyes shined as she caught sight of the guitar. That was not at all what she expected. “Adorable wasn’t the word I was going to go with. Hot is more what came to mind,” she said with a shrug. When Kass turned to look at the water, Zoey moved beside her and bumped her hip lightly. “Do you want me to go in the water so you can warm up? That’s the only reason I’d go instead of staying with you right now. I would be perfectly content just laying beside you on the blanket and being with you.” She had the blanket in the bag and their dessert. It would be perfectly relaxing for Zoey, but she understood nerves, so she’d go in the water if needed.

Kassandra

The fact that Zoey was basically naked save for a bikini was enough for Kassandra to keep her gaze completely forward. She really didn't need to look like a complete and utter perv by checking out her friend. "Zo, you said you were gonna go to the beach and if that involves night swimming then don't let me take you away from that. Besides, you can lay down near me once you're ready to get cozy by a fire." Not to mention that would give just some time alone to her thoughts where she could mentally scream at whatever the hell was going on with this evening. Her train of thought led her back to when Zoey had mentioned how she'd have to have a serious talk about others who had taken her on dates. Did she tell her? Or did she just avoid the subject. It would probably be best to avoid it all together.

"I've uh... Never actually been taken out on a date." If Kassandra could look into a camera like she was on the Office, she would. Her mouth and brain were not in communication it seemed. "I've been on dates!" She quickly clarified, sighing deeply. "I was just the one that took her out on the dates." Her. Singular. Fuck. Stop giving away so much of your shitty, painful past tonight, West. "Oh look! A fire pit. That's nice, just means I get to light it and we'll be good to go!" Kass was thankful for the distraction as they neared the shore. Letting go of Zoey's hand, Kassandra looked around for a moment before spotting what she'd need. Setting her guitar down near the fire-pit, she walked a bit away to a rather large piece of driftwood. With ease, she lifted it up and brought it over to the fire-pit, setting it down with a loud thunk.

Kneeling down in the sand, she pulled out a lighter and began the process of lighting the kindling. Within a few moments the fire began to roar in front of her and she dusted off the sand from her hands. "Alright, I'll be here whenever you're ready to come out of the water. If you need me, call me. I hate the water but if you need me, I'll brave it for you." Kassandra said with a smirk. That was easy. Playful banter was so much easier than admitting that there was truthfully something going on. But Gods, was she finding herself more and more wanting to do something about what she felt every time she saw the blonde. But for now? For now she'd just sit by the fire, play her guitar, and throw her lust out the window. Cause that's all it was. Lust. Mmmmmmmmmhmmmmmm.

Zoey

“Kass,” she said teasingly in response before continuing. “That was before I ran into you, and I’d much rather be with you than burning off steam because I wasn’t seeing you.” She almost scolded herself for letting that out, but saying how she felt for those awkward weeks was a relief. She felt like a weight was lifted. “Also, you better know getting cozy next to a fire includes cuddling you when you aren’t playing. Just laying that expedition down now.” Still, she wouldn’t fight her on going into the water. It looked like a really nice night, and that didn’t mean she had to be gone long. 

“You hadn’t been taken out on a date,” she corrected lightly. Zoey didn’t know how much more clear she had to be about what her intentions were that evening, but she’d repeat it if necessary. “Whoever she was, obviously was an idiot if she didn’t want to treat you to something special every once in a while. I mean, I’d never taken anyone out on a date before until tonight, but I wanted to because you deserve to be taken care of sometimes too.” Zoey was thankful that she’d said that while Kass was busy setting up the fire because she didn’t know if she’d gotten it all out otherwise. Suddenly, she thought that getting a swim in was a good idea to get her emotions in check. “I could just shift into a water animal, but thanks for your courage,” she teased. “I’ll be back in a little bit.”

As the blonde walked towards the water, she stretched lightly. The temperature was perfect since Khione was no longer angry about her son being taken, and she quickly lost herself in the waves. Her mind was running in circles. Zoey was never the person to initiate things or even have thoughts that could lead to innuendo. She’d never felt the urge to go there. Still, with Kass, she felt like she was practically on fire. There was tension in her lower abdomen, and her mouth, Gods, it just seemed to work on it’s own accord. Before she realized it, she’d swam a good mile away from the shore. Not wanting to be gone too long, she turned around and headed back. 

As she walked back towards where Kass was, she couldn’t help but smile as she wrung her hair out over her shoulder. The other woman just looked so beautiful in the glow of the fire out by the water. She’d left her bag with Kass so she could set the blanket up to make herself comfortable. Zoey sat in front of the brunette. The fire was a nice way to dry off. “Are you sure you don’t want to go in? Your bra and underwear is essentially a bikini. Or we could skinny dip instead in a little while. There would be less people out and about,” she said with a shrug. She’d done it late at night and loved it. Although, her getting caught was much less likely when she could just shift into bird or something that made an easy escape. Plus, seeing Kassandra naked was not something she could handle. She’d surely explode from frustration and would not be able to resist touching.

Kassandra

Words escaped her as Zoey spoke to her before taking off into the night to go swim. For several moment she just stared at the flames that licked the air, not sure how to process anything. Had she meant like... A date date? Or like a friend date. She'd been on friend dates before, some of her former friends from academy calling them 'frates'. Biting her lower lip, she looked up from the fire to the water where Zoey was going out rather far. The woman relaxed some at the distance that was between them, worried that Zoey would suddenly develop the ability to read minds. So instead of thinking of that, she picked up her guitar after laying out Zoey's towel for her when she'd get back from her swim. Fingers began to pick gently at strings, chords falling into a rhythm as she leaned back against the drift wood. "I've watched my wild youth disappear in front of my eyes...Moments of magic and wonder, it seems so hard to find...Is it ever coming back again? Is it ever coming back again? Take me back to the feeling when everything was left to find..." Her voice carried out gently into the night, singing to herself. Luckily no one else seemed to be on the beach as she continued. "Cause it comes and goes in waves, it always does... It always does..."

Eventually that song faded out so she began to play another, followed by another and another. After a while, Zoey began to walk back and Kassandra chose to stop her singing. Gentle strumming remained as she took in the sight of the very, very attractive blonde in front of her. Her mouth went dry, trying to form words until she realized that Zoey had said something about skinny dipping. "As uh... Amazing as it sounds getting buck-ass naked and freezing my tits off, I'm good. I'm not really a fan of the ocean. I think going in at night would make it ten thousand times worse. But I'm glad you had fun. Now c'mon and get warm. I laid out the towel for ya." Kass patted the space next to her, giving a warm smile. When Zoey sat down, Kass took her jacket that she had on and wrapped it around the other woman's shoulders. "Before you even think about asking me if I need it, I'm fine. I run hot. And yes, you heard that right." Her grin was cheeky, trying to push past the feelings that bubbled up in her gut every time she flirted with her. For a while she just strummed on her guitar, not really doing any true tune. "We were sixteen," She started, not sure if Zoey would remember the conversation that they'd kind of had before she had gone in the ocean. "When I took her out on our first real date. We went to this abandoned park and I made a picnic for us. I couldn't take us out anywhere because we weren't out yet. Or at least... I wasn't. I paid for everything with my summer job money and it was great. That was the night we..." Kassandra trailed off, clearing her throat.

"After that though... I never went out on another date. Or at least anything that I qualified as a date. I tried in my senior year. This girl that I had kind of a thing for. Took her out to dinner and a movie. And then found out she... Nevermind. Just a bad experience all around. So I haven't really been on one in uh... A decade?" Her head ducked down, biting her lip as chords began to be played once more, a familiar tune drifting into existence. "Until tonight, that is. Do you treat all your friends to dates?" It was mostly a teasing tone but there was a hidden layer of worry that she'd been imagining the charge between them. What she'd do with that information, she didn't know. Either way, she didn't really wait for an answer as she started to sing along to the tune she'd been playing. "Somebody said you got a new friend... Does she love you better than I can?" Green eyes found blue, holding her gaze for a moment as she continued to sing softly. "Big black sky over my town... I know where you're at, I bet she's around... Yeah, I know it's stupid, I just gotta see it for myself..." Her eyes drifted away as she sang the next lyrics unable to look at her anymore out of fear that she'd go breathless. The fire was easy to look at as the shadows danced along her face. "I'm in the corner, watching you kiss her, ohhh... I'm right over here, why can't you see me? Ohhh... I'm giving it my all but I'm not the girl you're taking home, ooh..." Kassandra chose this moment to chance a glance up at Zoey, breath hitching slightly as she sang out the last lyric. "I keep dancing on my own..."

Zoey

Without having to think about it, Zoey moved to sit beside Kassandra and stretched her legs in front of her while leaning back on against her palms. She listened as the other woman talked more about her past and tried to imagine what it was like. Her upbringing was so different. The artist knew how lucky she was to grow up in the home she did. Even though her father had zero idea about what he was doing at first, there was never a question about how much he loved or accepted her. “I’ve never had to do the whole coming out thing,” she said with a shrug. “My only relationship was with a guy. Well, Theo,” she said with a roll of her eyes but an affectionate smile was on her lips. “But my father knows that I don’t really care about gender when it comes to attraction or relationships. I go by what I feel. He doesn’t care who I bring home as long as I’m happy. Although, Theo perplexed him. Not because he wasn’t great. We’re actually still best friends. We just — there was no spark there. We love each other but not the way a couple should.” Explaining her and her ex’s relationship was always complicated. So many people had an idea of exs and how they should act, and well, Zoey and Theo could not fall further outside of that idea. “We broke up about a year ago.”

The question was an out if she wanted one, and the blonde knew that. If she wanted to, she could say she treated her friends the same way and be done with all the confusing, all encompassing feelings. Yet, she couldn’t lie. She’d hate herself if she did. Someone needed to take a leap of faith for Kass it seemed, and she’d hate it if she didn’t. “I don’t take people I consider just friends on dates, no,” she started explaining. “I mean, I may go out with friends to dinner, but I won’t call it a date unless I’m interested in something other than friendship.” There, she’d done it. There was absolutely zero grey area left about what she’d said. Kass couldn’t act obtuse about it anymore even if she wanted to. The idea was both thrilling and terrifying. 

The lyrics hit her in a way that made her sad. She’d felt them all too much when she’d seen the other women in Kass’ room. Jealousy. It wasn’t a feeling she was used to, but she was starting to say that a lot when it came to the woman singing beside her. When she finished singing, she took in a breath and let it out slowly. “You really have a beautiful voice,” were the first words out of her mouth. “You’re — you’re kind of a goober.” The blonde couldn’t help but chuckle as she said the words because honestly she was in a bit of disbelief. “For someone who doesn’t do this often, you don’t even realize how good you are at charming someone without even trying.”

Kassandra

Her heart pounded in her ears as she felt herself going into an almost out of body experience as Zoey's words floated around like a damned ping-pong ball in her head. She was interested in something other than friendship? The thought made her chest swell and a blush tinge her cheeks. Was this happiness that she was experiencing? It is. Or at least it was. Because as swiftly as the feelings of euphoria had entered her, they just as quickly were replaced with fear. She didn't let people get close for this very reason. What they had, whatever this was... She'd fuck it up. Just like she always did. First with her mom, then Aurora. Everyone else after that had barely been let in until all Kassandra had done was hollow herself out. No longer did she believe in romance or love. No longer had she thought she was worthy of being something to someone. First loves come and go, she knew that. She learned that lesson well. But when your own mother doesn't even want you.. When your own father doesn't even care until he can make use for you... It was all too much. When had her chest gotten this tight? Was Zoey calling her charming? She couldn't tell, everything around her was fuzzy.

Kassandra's breathing came in soft gasps, eyes wide as the guitar was placed down to the side of her. She blinked in surprise at what was happening, never having experienced this sensation before. Why was her chest so tight? She couldn't... She couldn't breathe. Looking up at Zoey in confusion, she opened her mouth to try to say something but all she did was gasp in air. Oh Gods, that made it worse. Beginning to hyperventilate, Kassandra stood up far too quickly than she should have, not even bothering to dust off her pants from all the sand. Her head swam as she stood tall, not knowing where to go. She was on a beach for Zeus' sake. This wasn't really an ideal place for whatever the hell this was. Her right hand flexed open and closed several times, trembling. "I... I can't... I can't breathe." The brunette managed to choke out, eyes wide and terrified. What the fuck was happening to her?

Zoey

The silence was unnerving, but what happened afterwards was even more. At first she let Kass walk away figuring she needed space after being made to feel uncomfortable, but then the more she looked, the more Zoey saw that she didn’t look okay. Without thinking, she jogged towards her, and it didn’t take long for the blonde to realize that Kassandra was having a panic attack. There wasn’t a lot of time to think about how her vulnerability and feelings had caused it. All she could think about was helping. So, she stood in front of Kass, grabbed her hand, and placed it on her chest. “Breathe with me,” she said as blue eyes locked with green. “Feel my chest go up and down and try to mimic it.”

After a few moments, she noticed Kass’s breathing come more easily. When she was sure that the woman was no longer having such a hard time, she took a step back to give her some space. Now that the major problem was out of the way, Zoey couldn’t help but remember what had caused it in the first place. It was the most obvious she’d been about her feelings and intentions which had led to the girl she felt them for having a panic attack. That was far from reassuring, and she’d be lying if she said that she knew where to go from there. “Are you okay?” That was much easier to focus on than her feelings. Focusing on someone else was always what she was better at anyway. “Do you want to head back? We can always hang out again another time if you’re not feeling great.” Giving Kass an excuse to leave was the nice thing to do. It was the only thing Zoey knew how to do. There wasn’t exactly a how to book for the situation lying around anywhere.

Kassandra

A hand reached out for her own and soon Kassandra's palm was resting on Zoey's chest. Nothing about this gesture was sexual however it was very intimate. More intimate than Kassandra was truly ready for but somehow, someway... It was helping. Zoey breathed for the both of them for several moments until finally her chest didn't hurt, her hands didn't tremble, and she could breathe on her own again. She wanted to thank her for helping her with whatever had just happened but the blonde was moving away from her, her heart sinking like a stone. The look in Zoey's eyes was one she never wanted to see, Gods, those eyes. "No!" Kass quickly spoke, realizing it came out more like a loud plea than the soft tone she wished she would have used. So she tried again. "No... Please. Don't go." Licking her lips, she took the small steps forward towards Zoey, hoping to close the distance that the blonde had put between them. "I'm sorry that I... That that happened. I've never had that happen. Not since my--I'd uh.. I'd forgotten what that had felt like." Another deep breath as she steeled her nerves, closing her eyes for a moment. "The truth is I'm terrified." I'm not good, Zoey. That's what she wanted to say. She wanted to tell her that she was poison. But she couldn't.

Fingers shook for a moment until they made purchase on Zoey's cheek, the backs of her knuckles softy trailing down the skin there until she tilted the other woman's chin up gently. "I wasn't looking for anyone." Those words were probably the most honest thing she'd ever said to Zoey, her chest tightening once more but swiftly deciding to push the panic aside for just one fucking minute. "And then I met you." There. That was simple enough. Right? "I don't know what is happening between us. But you... You scare me. And that's--Gods, that's not on you. That's all on me." She closed her eyes tightly, sighing. "Fuck, I'm not wording this right at all." Kassandra took the last few steps closer to Zoey, eliminating any major distance between their torsos. "I don't know what to do about any of this. I'm... I'm scared to do anything about this. About you. But Gods, I want to." Her forehead rested against Zoey's, unable to look at the other woman. "You make me feel like I'm on fire. You make me... Feel." The older woman could feel just how close they were, could tell that by the sensation of her breath puffing against Zoey's lips as her hand remained cupping her jaw. "Zoey... I... I really want to..." The brunette tipped her head closer, lips wanting desperately to search for the other woman's. She could almost taste--RING.

Whatever spell that had taken over her was broken as soon as her phone started ringing from her pocket. "I..." She rasped, voice low. Lower than Zoey had ever heard it. "I think I need to... To take this." Kassandra regrettably pulled away, grabbing her phone from her pocket as she held it up to her ear. Immediately she winced as someone talked sternly to her for several moments. Eventually she hung up, clearing her throat as she looked at Zoey helplessly. "Nugget woke up and is terrorizing the neighbors. I have to get back. Zoey..." She tried, still in close proximity to the other woman, not quite sure what to do.

Zoey

The blonde was so entranced with the words coming out of the woman’s mouth, and her proximity, that she couldn’t say anything. All she could do was wait with baited breath for Kass to kiss her which was what she thought was going to happen until the blasted phone rang. When Kassandra pulled back, Zoey tilted her head back towards the sky and closed her eyes. She needed to focus on her own breathing so she didn’t scream in frustration. When the phone call ended, the artist looked at her date again and gave a small smile. “Mmm, considering the owner of the Inn had to leave the island and left her sister in charge, who you’re currently with, I’d say you’re safe from too much trouble,” she added lightly to hopefully stop some of the worrying. It was something she’d meant to bring up anyway since she’d be at where Kassandra was staying more often. That was just a fun way to bring it up. 

Zoey stepped forward so they were close again, looped her index fingers in Kass’s belt loops, and tugged the woman forward slightly. “Let’s head back,” she started before leaning forward on her tippy toes and giving the brunette a kiss on the cheek. She lingered for a few seconds to hopefully quell the need she was feeling before pulling back. “This is always going to be scary. Not because it’s me and you, but it would be with anyone. Vulnerability always is. I’d love to promise I’d never hurt you, but that would just put me on a pedestal that wouldn’t be healthy,” she started as she tried to find the right words to give Kassandra some comfort. “You just have to figure out if I’m worth the risk of getting hurt over, and I don’t want you answering that now. Sleep on it. Take your time to figure this out and fight your demons. If you need help, I’m here.” 

With that, she took Kass’ hand, interlaced their fingers, and walked them back to where their belongings were. When they got back to the fire pit, she threw her shirt on again, and worked to get things packed up. “You didn’t ruin anything before you worry,” she said as she worked on folding the blanket. “So don’t let your mind go there.”

Kassandra

"Wait, I'm sorry what?" She was about to press further at the blonde mentioning that she'd be at the Inn more often, mouth feeling like it was full of cotton as she tried to process that. But then Zoey was getting closer again, the brunette feeling a tug on her jeans as she stutter-stepped closer. Her breathing almost stopped as Zoey leaned up on her tippy-toes to kiss her on the cheek. Green eyes fluttered shut from the contact, staying that way for several moments, even after the other woman had pulled back from her. So instead of opening her eyes, she just kept them closed as Zoey talked to her, trying to quell any and all fears from her mind. Whatever was happening between them clearly wasn't one-sided. Kassandra just had to be willing to do something about it. To put whatever this was into words. Fuck. That was a lot to process. Eventually she did open her eyes as a hand slipped into her own, following Zoey back to the firepit. It didn't take long for them to pack up their things, put out the fire and wait for Zoey to get her clothes back on over her beach attire.

The walk back to the car was silent as they walked, fingers still interlaced. Only when she needed to put the guitar up did she finally let go of the blonde's hand, regret filling her instantly. Once she got into the car, she turned on the ignition and took the car out of park, backing up before taking off down the road. The stereo connected to her phone via bluetooth and began to play a song softly through the speakers just in time for Kassandra to get up the guts to do what she hadn't on the ride over; she reached over and interlaced her fingers with Zoey's once more. 'I want you more than I need you and I need you so bad...Are you coming back? Are you coming back? I'm waiting...' Giving a small squeeze to the hand that was in her own, she kept her gaze focused on the road for the remainder of the time it would take for her to get to Zoey's home. When they pulled up, Kass got out of the car again to move around to Zoey's door, opening it up with a small smile. "I believe this is your stop."

Kassandra helped her out of the car despite not needing to, offering her a hand. Sure, it was because she wanted to instigate physical touch, something that she didn't know she craved. Keeping quiet as she walked the short distance to Zoey's doorstep, Kassandra waited until Zoey had reached the step that led into her home. This gave them more of a level-playing height and it honestly was what Kassandra was waiting for. Fingers tugged lightly on Zoey's, getting the girl to turn around to look at her. "You're worth the risk." She breathed out, licking her lips. It was honest and terrifying and she almost shook from the fear of it all. Leaning forward, she pressed a soft kiss to Zoey's forehead, staying there for a moment too long to be considered just a friend. As she pulled back, she gave another smile and began to walk backwards away from Zoey. "And hey," She started, hands quickly being shoved into her jeans pockets. "The next time you see me on your doorstep... I'll finish what I started." Her cheeks were tinged pink at the implication but she gave a small nod despite this, turning around and heading back to her car until eventually she was out of sight.

[mydeardeath]

To belong with (6/8)

Whole series on tumblr (to belong series tag) or AO3

---

At first, it had seemed to be a good idea. Take Tim with him to do groceries shopping. Let him pick whatever he wanted, what he had missed. But seeing Tim pull another bag of candy into the cart made him regret his decisions. Part of him hoped that this wasn't what Tim usually ate, that he was just going for that junk because he had lacked food when he was... away. But Damian suspected that it was just what the other considered food. He was quite appalled. He knew that Tim wasn't the best cook. But that! Damian was quite horrified. Good thing that Tim had him now.

Damian had to restrain himself for throwing it all. Who could have imagined that courting would be so hard? Maybe he should invite Bart too. He was Tim's friend as well and a speedster. He would make all this junk disappear in a matter of seconds then he would show Tim what real meals were like and how amazing he was at making them. Damian pulled out his phone to tape a quick text to Conner, one eye still on Tim. He was still so scared of losing him. His heart had jumped in his chest when he had lost sight of him earlier. Tim hadn't been far, just in the next aisle. But still, Damian preferred to have him where he could see as much as possible. Tim had been taken away from him once. It could happen again. For all he knew, the ones that had taken Tim in the first place might want him back. There was no certainty that Tim was safe, that they would leave him alone. And Damian wasn't going to let that happen again.

He quickly caught up to Tim, receiving a little smile when he asked if he wanted anything else or if he was ready to leave. Tim was oblivious to Damian's feeling, his fear of having Tim disappear once again. He was just enjoying being back in Gotham. Being free after all this time. Because even if it had not been years but weeks for Tim, it was still a long time being prisoner.

***

Preparing lunch didn't take long considering there wasn't much cooking to do. It was good working in tandem with Tim even for such a simple, domestic task.  That not something Damian had imagined he would be doing. He had shared a few nights with other people. Nameless people, he knew nothing of. He had not cared to create a romantic connection with anyone. It was kind of illogical. He had loved Tim, but they had never been together. Most people had seen his feelings for Tim as a simple crush, then they had seen it as an unhealthy obsession. And maybe they had been right. He had been a kid back then. He had started to spend time with Tim had the end, had started to know him. But that wasn't enough to form a true relationship. He could admit to himself that he had been born on a childish caprice. Thing is, Damian never had closure. He was given hope that one day he would have the chance to prove himself worthy of Tim's attention. Maybe, in the end, Tim wouldn't have been able to return his love. Maybe Damian would have grown out of his infatuation for the Omega. There was no way of knowing what might have happened. Damian never got his opportunity. All he could do was wonder "what if?". That thought had held him back for years. Now he would get his chance. He would take his chance with Tim. Whether or not he would be successful didn't matter. Well, it did matter a bit. But Damian could accept not getting him if that choice was theirs and not the outcome of outside forces.

For Tim to make a choice about their future, he first needed to get his life back. Damian didn't want to share his return with the family quite yet. He was still mad at them. It didn't stop him from knowing that it needed to happen. He couldn't keep Tim locked up in their apartment. Of course, Tim would end up attracted by Damian if it was only the two of them. Whatever had happened to Tim had been traumatizing. Damian had been the first familiar face he had seen in weeks, the first safe place he had found. If he kept Tim away from the other, the Omega would become dependant of him. No matter how much he desired him, that wasn't the way he wanted to get him.

He was informed of Tim's friends arrival just a minute before they were at the door. He had put a satellite in place to inform him of their movement. Tim was excited to see them. They were his friends after all, but Damian could tell that he was also anxious. He had preferred being warned in advance and not have them suddenly banging on the door.

Tim's hands had started trembling when Damian had told him they were almost here. The youngest Robin had taken them into his own, gently squeezing his hands to make him understand that he was here for him.

"I will get it" Damian let go of Tim when the doorbell rang, maintaining eye contact as long as possible before turning to his guests.

Kon was here with Bart as well as Cassie. Damian hadn't thought of inviting her. He hadn't wanted to crowd Tim with multiple people from the start. The invitation to Bart was solely for the junk food that needed to disappear. He should have guessed that it would have been hard to have the two of them without her tagging along. Not that he minded her company, he just hoped that it wouldn't feel overwhelming to Tim. Maybe that would prepare him for their family.

"Damian", they saluted him, "so why did you needed us here?"

"I don't need you. He does." Damian made a vague motion behind him even if they could not see Tim from the threshold.

Conner was confused. He had not expected anyone else to be here. Damian didn't hang out with that many people. He had made some friends within the Titans but most of the time he was the one that came to see them. When he was in Gotham, he was either alone or with his family. Kon didn't imagine that Batman was waiting in the living room. Damian would have rather went to the manor than invite him over. It was way too calm for Dick and his daughter to be here. But there was someone here. Now that Damian had said that he wasn't alone, Kon could clearly hear another heartbeat not far away. One that seemed oddly familiar. One that brought back memories from years ago.

Kon rushed past Damian without a word, leaving his flabbergasted friends in his wake. In less than a second, Kon stood before Tim. Or someone that looked exactly like him at least. But it couldn't be. Tim was dead.

Kon knew that Tim had tried to clone him when he had died. Maybe he had kept trace of his works and Damian had found them. Kon knew what Tim had meant to Damian. The youngest Robin had never seemed to grow past his lost. He had never heard of him dating. Yes, he had a few flings. But one night stands weren't close to a relationship. Maybe Damian had broken down and decided to create a new Tim.

But as he was thinking about that, some part of him couldn't shake the feeling that this was the real Tim. He knew one or two things about clones. He had learned to recognize them. One of the easiest ways was listening to the heartbeat. That not something you could simply replicate. You could learn, but it was a long process. And, unless Damian had records about the rhythm of Tim's heartbeats, he would not have been able to get it right just by pure luck.

They were used to people coming back to life. Him. Bart. Damian. But six years was a long time. And the man before him didn't look older than the last time he had seen him. He had not been raised from the dead and waited years to return to Gotham.

Yet, somehow, this was Tim standing before him.

Kon didn't waste another second before pulling him into a bone-crushing hug.

"I may be civil to you now, Superboy, but if you hurt him when he has just come back to me, I will make you chock on kryptonite."

Kon released a bit of the pressure he had put on Tim, apologizing quietly to his friend.

"What the fuck?" Cassie nearly yelled. She and Bart had been following Damian into the room. They hadn't been able to get a clear look on who Kon was hugging, the other person almost disappearing under Kon's form.

They hadn't known why Damian had asked for them. Kon's reaction had raised even more questions. They hadn't known what to expect. But Tim wouldn't have been their first idea. Nor the tenth.

Bart and Cassie hadn't been exactly enthused to answer Damian's invitation. Yes, he was somehow civil now, but he had yet to be anything close to friendly to them. They were glad that Kon had convinced them to come. This was the best surprise they had had in forever!

For a long time, none of them said anything, simply joining in the hug while Damian watched from a few feet away. Bart was the first to pull away.

"Have you always been this short? I don't remember you being that much tiny. But I was shorter back then. Probably why I didn't notice. Wow, and look at this babyface. You are so cute. How come I never noticed you were so cute." Bart was gushing, even attempting to pinch Tim's cheeks.

"I am not cute" Tim spluttered, offended. He had always been one of the shortest in the family. He was roughly the same size as Cass and taller than Damian. But Damian had been 12 years old, so he hadn't meant much. It was expected that Damian would grow but Tim had thought he would too. He knew he would never have the same bulk that Bruce and Jason had, but he could have hope for a late growth spurt. Seemed like Bart had had one. Cassie too, even if on a smaller scale. They had all been teens the last time he had seen them. While he was still one, his friends had grown into adults. He had missed so much.

"Hey, are you okay Tim?" Cassie asked him gently.

"Yeah. I'm happy to see you guys." He smiled faintly. He couldn't quite hide his sadness. He should have aged with his friend. Experience the start of adulthood with them. How many things had he missed in their lives? They would probably tell him everything but he would never get to experience them, and that hurt.

"Ow, Tim. We are so happy to have you back." Cassie smiled at him.

"Yeah, especially if you want back in the team. Imagine, with his adorableness, villains will stop fighting right away. Make our jobs easier." Bart joked.

Tim gripped his arm and threw him on the grounds.

"I see why you would need an easier job, you're getting slow kid flash." Tim teased him, earning laughs from his former team and a proud smile from Damian. He may not have returned at his highest form, but he could still kick some ass.

[whetstonefires]

Flamebird and Batboy

(aka The One Where Dick Mentors Bruce)

-

The sun caught blinding on the gold markings mottling Flamebird’s crimson mask. “No.”

Bruce could have screamed. He’d spent months pursuing this meeting, seeking out data to know where to look and arranging for it to be possible for him to be there—here, on this brownstone roof, when Gotham’s most successful vigilante passed through. Ever since the last lead he’d had on the man with the gun had run dry. “Please.”

He tried to beg without sounding like a child, without losing his dignity, but he was nine and trying not to scream. “I’ve run out of other options.”

“And I…look. Sorry to be harsh, but it’s not my problem. I can’t help you, so I’m not going to try.”

“Of course you can help me!” Bruce scowled. “You’re the best detective around! You know more than anybody about crime in Gotham! Everyone knows that. If anybody can help me, it’s you.”

Flamebird sighed. The violence of it made the brilliant folds of his cape ripple. “You want to go after the guy who did your parents? Kiddo, he was…just some mugger. I get wanting to see him punished, but it won’t make a big difference to the world.”

“It’ll mean one less man around who’s willing to shoot people to death! Why do you even do this, if you don’t think it makes a difference?”

“I don’t think that. I’m saying I’m not willing to launch a whole special investigation on top of the police one, for a killer who’s only special because of how much money his victims had.”

He sighed again, more gently this time. “I understand how important it is to you. I do. But hunting down that one gunman isn’t a good use of my resources. It’s not fair. It’s not what I’m about.

“There are a lot of other kids who’ve had their moms and dads killed, Bruce,” he said, and his voice was so soft, not coddling and hair-petting but not dismissive either, his voice said this is the most important thing in the world and we both know it. “And nobody cares. Nobody but me is even trying to find out what happened or hold anyone accountable. I can’t drop everything for your revenge. It wouldn’t be right. The world already bends over backwards to worry about you.”

It was nothing Bruce hadn’t thought, in around the edges, and even had people say little bits and scraps of to his face, exasperated teacher’s aides and that one counselor who got fired afterward, everyone who loses someone feels this way, you’re not special, what makes you think your grief is more important than other people’s just because you’re a billionaire?

But it was different, too, because it didn’t say Bruce was wrong. It just said, these other kids weren’t wrong either, and Flamebird owed them more than he did Bruce, because Bruce had people to worry about him already.

“That makes sense,” he said. “I’m...not asking you to focus on my case. I want training.”

“Sorry—what?”

“I want to be able to do what you do. I want you to mentor me, Flamebird. And eventually I’ll find that man for myself. You don’t have to worry about it.”

That had finally taken the ever-so-composed vigilante off-guard. He had nothing to say. He wasn’t exactly gaping, but Bruce clearly had control of the field.

“I have resources,” Bruce said. “I’m fully prepared to commit them, if you teach me. That grapple gun thing you have—it’s brilliant, but it’s obviously been mended and patched more than once. That can’t be safe.”

Shock leaking slowly out of his body language, Flamebird contemplated him for several more seconds that seemed like an eternity. “So in exchange for—taking you under my wing,” and the man actually smirked a little at his own awful pun, “you’re proposing to become my financial backer?”

“Consider it tuition payment if you prefer.”

Flamebird snorted. Shook his head. “Go home, kid. Even if it’s a mansion I’m sure it’s not the same as it was before, but it’s still there. I promise it won’t always feel like this.”

Bruce’s hands shook and his nails would have eaten crescents into his palms again if Alfred hadn’t started keeping them carefully trimmed. He steadied his breathing with a huge effort. “Okay,” he said, humiliated by the slight squeak that the tightness of his throat had put into his voice, but ignoring it, pushing on with all the dignity he could muster, which turned out to mean sounding very much like Alfred.

“How would you prefer to receive the funds? I can have an initial installment of five thousand dollars delivered in cash by Friday.”

Flamebird sighed. “Kid. I said no.”

“I heard you.”

“You can’t buy me.” Disdain was leaking into the hero’s voice, along with irritation, and it was only in hearing that that Bruce realized how absent it had been from the condescending rejection a minute ago.

“I’m not trying to,” he snapped. “Even if you won’t teach me. You need funding. You deserve funding. You’re the only one really trying to make a difference out there. It’s not your fault you weren’t fast enough to save Mom and Dad.” He turned and walked stiff-legged toward the fire escape. “I’ll have the five thousand when you decide to tell me how you’d prefer to receive it.”

“Kid.”

“Just tell me one thing, would you?” Bruce held onto the iron railing before going over the edge, and measured his breathing. “Why did you come back to Gotham? You started out here as Robin, almost fifteen years ago—don’t argue, everybody knows it’s you—but then you left. You must’ve barely been a grownup back then. You went all kinds of places, you worked with Superman. Why do you care about this city?”

Flamebird drew a breath, and then didn’t speak for long enough Bruce looked back to make sure the hero hadn’t silently disappeared. He was still there. “I don’t,” he answered, when he saw Bruce looking. “Care about this city. I hate it, actually. My parents came here, and they died. Gotham killed them. But…I care about the people that have to live here.”

After a second, Bruce nodded. That made sense, made so much sense. It even explained that strange connection he’d felt that night, when Flamebird held him until the police arrived, the sense of being understood.

(He would never forget Flamebird’s first words to him, half a year ago—not aw no, kid or are you hurt anywhere? Is any of the blood yours? though those were seared into his consciousness forever along with the rest of that night, but: What did this? A man? Yeah? Where did he go? Okay. How long ago? Right after? Okay. He’s probably gone, but I’m going to run and check, alright? I’ll be right back. Do you think you can scream, if anything happens?

Bruce hadn’t been sure. He’d nodded and pointed his way through that conversation, up to then. So Flamebird had handed him a thing that would go bang if he threw it onto the pavement or at the alley wall, shrugged out of his yellow and scarlet cape, wrapped it around Bruce, and promised to be right back.

He had been, too, with Sorry, nothing on his lips and warm arms to replace the cape with, that somehow didn’t feel even as wrong as Alfred’s would, later that night, when he finally managed to cry.)

“You avenged them,” Bruce said. “Didn’t you. You got the man who killed your parents. That’s why you left.”

Flamebird hesitated. Sighed. “Yeah, kid,” he said, defeated. “It took me a while. The fosters I got dumped with after it happened weren’t exactly supportive. But I brought down the Zucco crime syndicate and sent Tony Zucco to the slammer, and then I left. I thought I was done. But I wasn’t.” He was standing oddly at ease, now, when Bruce turned again to face him, not poised as if about to leap off the far side of the roof. “I’ll never be done. There’ll always be another fight.”

Bruce squinted at him. “Why?”

“Because I turned myself into someone with the skills to help. And there’s so much helping that needs to be done.”

He tilted his head, oddly like the bird he called himself behind that mask, all marbled red and gold. The green there had been in the few color pictures of Robin that anyone managed to take back in the day, before Bruce was born, had retreated now into a single wristband, and Bruce wondered why. Because of the flame? Or did the green mean something that Flamebird had now left behind?

“Would that happen to you, you think?” the hero asked Bruce. “If you followed me, on this quest to avenge your parents? Would you be in the fight forever? Or would you be able to stop? And go back to the home that’s waiting for you, and stay there, and grow up to be…whatever millionaires grow up to be, since they don’t need jobs.”

“My dad…was a doctor,” Bruce said. “I always…wanted to be like him.”

“That’s a good goal,” Flamebird said, and he sounded like he meant it, at least.

“But it’s not enough!” The words burst out of Bruce, more a surprise to him than to the superhero facing him, it seemed like. “If I was the one who’d gotten shot, Dad couldn’t have fixed me! It was too late already! Doctors can only fix people after they’re already hurt, I want to save them before that! I want to stop it happening! I want people to be safe!”

Flamebird whistled softly into the silence his shouting left behind. “Is that how it is.”

Bruce rubbed his wrist over his forehead, only to find he wasn’t actually sweating, he just felt like he should be. “Yeah. I guess.”

“…fine. I’ll help you with the basics. We’re not working on your parents’ case though, I don’t have that kind of time and it’s still open at the GCPD. Keep up with it on your own time if you want.”

Bruce gaped, then got control of himself and recovered his poise, pulled his shoulders back. “That’s fine. Great. Excellent. Glad to be, uh, working with you. Where should I send the money?”

Flamebird’s face twisted, and for a second Bruce thought it was loathing, or rage, but then he realized it was pain. Somehow, for some reason, when he’d stayed almost calm talking about taking down the people who murdered his parents. “Let’s just…call the first two weeks a test period, okay? You don’t have to pay me.”

“You need more money,” Bruce persisted.

“Way to rub it in. Look. I’m not comfortable accepting tuition from a child who’s not even ten yet. Subsidies seem a little less exploitative, but it’s still…” Flamebird rubbed a scarlet glove over his mouth, thinking. “You have a guardian, right?”

“Yes…”

“Do you like them?”

Did he like Alfred? The question seemed ludicrous for a second, like asking if he liked his left hand or his beating heart, but it wasn’t; Alfred was a person, and you liked and disliked people. Occasionally he hated Alfred, but only for not being Mom and Dad. “Yes.”

“Huh. That’s really definitive. Lucky. But they don’t know about this, do they?”

Bruce shook his head. Alfred knew he was out of the house, but not that he was sneaking out of the afternoon session of his summer computing course to roam the city. It was easy stuff, he’d blown through the whole curriculum in the first three days; meanwhile the 12-year-olds the class was aimed at needed their hands held through understanding how basic loops worked. He’d made a deal with the instructor not to mark his absences, so as long as he made it back in time, Alfred wouldn’t know anything.

“Okay. If we both still think this is worth it after two weeks, we talk to your guardian and get their permission. And then we can maybe talk about money.”

[bigskydreaming]

Something to keep in mind with a lot of fandom or fic critical stuff is like.....causation and correlation are two distinct things, and they’re not always both present in like, the reason someone might have an issue with a thing.

What I mean by that is, sometimes there are fanon or fic trends that people take issue with BECAUSE of a certain root problem. They dislike this end result in fic, because it is derived from this specific cause, and that cause and effect are the issue in their mind. 

BUT sometimes there are fanon or fic trends that people take issue with because the problem isn’t like....due to a specific cause and effect, rather, the problem is a thing always going hand in hand with something else that IS a problem in someone’s eyes.

For instance, its no secret I think abuse apologism, intentionally or not, is a big problem in Batfam fandom. This is why I have a huge issue with fics who make direct reference to story events from canon that include clear and unequivocable abuse, like NTT #55 or NW #30....in the sense that they utilize the FALLOUT from these scenes, they pick up the story thread of what Dick did in the aftermath of these scenes, those actions and choices that were his direct REACTION to the ACTIONS of others........BUT many of these fics fail to acknowledge those actual inciting actions themselves, because they don’t want to portray Bruce as abusive or acknowledge that depiction. 

However, by removing the inciting action, but keeping the ensuing reactions, they PIVOT the conflict from being born of Bruce’s actions and that Dick was reacting to.....to now have Dick in the driver’s seat of that conflict, with what were originally his reactions to harm done to him now taken out of context and repurposed as its OWN kind of inciting conflict, that other characters then react to as though he’s the problem.

This issue is one of causation. Its a textbook example of abuse apologism where the abuser is by default protected via their defenders removing them from the context of the abuse entirely, and pivoting the focus to be JUST on the abused, making their reactions entirely divorced from the REASONS they’re acting that way. The problem lies entirely in writing Dick as the aggressor in these situations, with the direct CAUSE being not wanting to write him as the one justifiably aggrieved.

Now compare and contrast this with something like Dick being a jerk to Jason when he was Robin, or similar situations where a time when Dick was the injured party in one respect like, coincides with a time where Dick is heavily hyped up as being the offering insult or injury to someone who has nothing to do with whatever happened to him.

The issue I have here is one of correlation. Its not a simple cause and effect thing in play here, but there is still connection between say, a heavy focus on what a jerk Dick is (without much basis for that ever happening) and at the same time, a deliberately light focus on Bruce’s role in Dick and Bruce’s dynamic at the time and what very much did happen in events directly referenced, and which are then in turn referenced as being a big part of Dick’s mood without ever letting this truly come into focus.

See, the issue here is still purely between Dick and Bruce, but there’s a correlative effect in what’s going on between Dick and Jason......as the more people are focused on what Dick is or isn’t doing in his dynamic with Jason, and THAT being the focal issue....the less people are thinking about or invested in what’s going on between Dick and Bruce, even when there’s nominal acknowledgment that that’s the real root of the problem overall.

Of course, then sometimes correlation BECOMES causation. Because the more a trend builds and builds, without acknowledgment or discussion of related issues, the more the unacknowledged connection causes problems in and of itself, and it all loops back in on itself and feeds a never-ending cycle of cause and effect and correlation and avoidance that literally can only ever be broken by just.....critical thinking and direct analysis.

You might think I was building to a point here, but hahaha jk, not really. Tbh this is mostly just me trying to break down a fandom phenomenon into bite-size pieces to present for consideration, because the only real point here is like.....this shit is complicated. It SHOULD be complicated, as anything that pertains to not just liking certain characters and interacting with them, but also interacting with their STORIES and the real life problems they’re mirroring and the resulting behaviors that stem from them, like....should be. 

The problem with treating story-telling (as either a reader or a writer) as escapism, is that story-telling doesn’t exist TO be a form of escapism. Its often utilized as such, or aimed to be used as such, but story-telling is at its heart just......a means of talking about the human condition. Life. How we interact with it.

And thus, even though some stories very much DO work to provide escapism from life and its problems.....some stories very much will NEVER work as such, because you can’t escape from life’s problems by way of....stories that are meant to be examinations of life’s problems. 

(Something that’s particularly an issue with discussions of fiction vs reality. You hear a lot about how fiction isn’t reality, or how fiction does affect reality, but something we really need to talk about more is how some peoples’ fiction IS some other peoples’ reality. Like it may not be the equivalent of writing someone else’s personal memoir, but there needs to be more serious acknowledgment that when writing something that is abstract for you, personally, as in outside your realm of personal experiences because it pertains to aspects of identity or marginalization or lived experiences that aren’t a direct reflection of your own......these topics are not REMOTELY abstract for someone whose very real identity or lived experiences or oppression IS directly reflected in what you’re treating as simple fiction born of your imagination and nothing more. And thus how you interact with what you’re writing and reading and treating as nothing more than fictional, someone else is interacting with as something that’s a lot more real than that, feels a lot more real than that, that’s more personal than abstract). 

But anyway like, escapism isn’t a one-size fits all kinda deal, and CAN’T be. Because the things people want to escape from, the lives that they’re escaping from, and what they need to escape from it vs what will never allow them to escape from it because it will actually just be more examination and awareness of the reasons for their own want for escapism in the first place....none of these things are one size fits all, and that’s why fandom and fanfic are never ever ever going to be a one-stop shop for escapist fantasy the way too many people in fandoms try and treat them as.

And at a certain point you either gotta like, get on board with the fact that life is complicated and there IS no easy breakdown or solution to or discussion about extremely complicated topics like this, and that’s just the way it is so level up already and start treating it as such.....

Or you can do the other thing, which is double down on digging your heels in and pretending there is a simple, shallow, superficial way of dealing with or acknowledging super complicated shit, with that usually just being.....avoiding treating it as such.

Which is the part that tends to lead to perpetuation of cycles of bullshit and feeding directly back into a feedback loop of acknowledging fallout of issues without ever acknowledging the instigation of issues and whoops look at that, a pointed point crept up on me after all, myyyyyyy baaaaaaaaaad.

[eastonia-blog]

Let's Chat about these Reversed Aged!Robins AUs

So recently I replied to @gentlemenpaws generalask!post which said…

And I thought I would go a little into my reply to him. Because and hear me out.

I can never take reversed ages Robin headcanons and stories seriously. Without turning off my brain a little. And please, please, please just hear me out.

There is a reason why.

(TLDR at the bottom of this long post)

1) This is the most important reason. Say it with me. THERE IS NO ROBIN WITHOUT DICK GRAYSON.

Think about all other ‘sidekick’ or 'junior partner’ characters. With the exception of maybe Speedy, what are their names and costumes? Aqualad, Kid Flash, Wonder Girl, Super Girl, Super Boy, Bat Girl, Miss Martian... You know, the famous ones? The ones that all based their costumes in echo of their mentors (and yes, I’m including Roy Harper here, Speedy’s costume is a mirror of Green Arrow’s - in red).

So why doesn’t Batman’s apprentice call himself Batboy? Why is his design so divergent from Batman’s? (Okay I understand there’s other reasons but I’m trying to stay in universe/lore here). Depending on the continuity, when Barbara Gordon/Betty Kane became Batgirl she followed the trend. Robin’s identity although associated with the Bat, can stand alone without context.

Why Robin? Why the traffic lights? Something that has been shown time and time again (despite continuity differences and all) is that Robin was Dick’s pet name, from Mary Grayson, his mum. Again depending on the continuity, Mary Grayson called Dick Robin because:-

1)  He was “...always bobbin’ along.” (Pre-Flashpoint Robin: Year One)

Interesting because it could either refer to his skill in acrobatics or a tendency to get underfoot because of his curiousity.

2) Born on the first day of Spring. 

Or...

 3) Just as a tease because he just really, really loved the stories of Robin Hood.

The traffic light colouration he chose for his costume, even the design of his costume? Well if you take a look at most of the Dick Grayson origin stories (Pre-Flashpoint: Robin Year One, Batman Year Three. Post-Rebirth: Batman #54 just to name a couple examples) the Grayson aerialist costume is... Red, Green and Yellow. The proportions of the colours and presence of a cape vary but traffic lights are Grayson colours.

Robin was Dick Grayson’s tribute to his dead family.*

*Part of the reason why Dick got so hurt that Bruce gave Robin away to Jason was because Bruce forgot that Robin was not his to give. This is why the other Pre-Flashpoint comics had Dick give Tim his blessing to become Robin. And then outright have Dick give the R to Damian. Jason eventually got Dick’s blessings but by that point, the relationship was never going to start from the best place.

2) Damian as the first 'apprentice’ would not work. Why? BRUCE WOULD NOT HAVE SURVIVED LONG ENOUGH. (I can hear all the cries of ’But he’s Batman!’ ring out).

Dick and Bruce met super early into Bruce’s career as Batman.

Remember how pre-Batman Bruce went about as a generic vigilante without a moniker or anything? And got his butt kicked so hard by the Gotham streets that it took a bat crashing through a window to convince him to try again?

Pre-Robin Batman was characterised by one thing:- Recklessness. He knew sooner or later Gotham was going to claim his life and that he would probably be going sooner rather than later.

He spent a lot of time recovering in those days. Maybe more than he did catching lowlifes or solving crimes.

And then everything changed when the Flying Graysons fell.

The crime that touched Dick mirrored the crime that affected Bruce. (It’s actually pretty interesting from a meta standpoint. The Waynes died in a circle of light - under a Park Row streetlight and the Graysons paralleled that with the spotlight remaining on them long after they hit the ground.)

And Bruce looked into the eyes of little 8-10 year-old Dick Grayson, and saw himself. But more than that, he (Bruce) saw an opportunity to change things for him (Dick). So that Dick would not end up like him.

(Want to know a cool thing? The reason why Dick’s relationship with Bruce is different to the approach Bruce took to Jason, Tim and Damian? Age difference. Bruce is about 14-18 years older than Dick. Putting him in that weird spot where you could simultaneously be a teen parent or an older sibling. Bruce has a more Older-Brother-Promoted-to-Parent relationship with Dick than father-son. It’s why in the Rebirth Nightwing vs Hush Prelude to the Wedding issue, Dick thought he could be a candidate for Best Man).

This is also the reason why I love Dick’s and Damian’s relationship so much is because it directly parallels Bruce’s and his. I don’t quite know what the age difference is post-Rebirth (and I tend to outright ignore the New 52 at times) but since Rebirth tends to mirror Pre-Flashpoint more than not, I think the age difference between Dick and Damian is about... 14-16 years? Again, simultaneously a teen parent and older sibling.

This is also why I don’t think a Damian as the first Dark Squire would work, because Bruce would not be in a good place to help out a child. Nor will there be the same connection that there was between him and Dick. Damian being first would probably ruin Batman for ever taking on someone in the ‘apprentice’ role.

So after Bruce (eventually, inevitably) takes Dick in, Bruce is forced to realise that he has to be more careful because he has to be there for Dick.

This is when Bruce fully embraces the amount of Crazy Prepared he’d need to be to be.

And then Dick (at 8-10 years-old! Seriously we talk about the amount of detective skill Tim has to figure out Batman’s and Robin’s identities... But we don’t talk about the amount of charisma, courage and will it takes to out-stubborn the Batman???) makes his way onto the streets (and Bruce can’t stop him so he has to help him). So now what does Bruce have to do?

There is a rule medics and first responders have to follow: Protect yourself in order to save others.

Bruce is no longer allowed to accept dying as an option (until Dick is old enough to take care of himself). This forces Batman to work situations to his advantage so Batman and Robin can both come home.

Basically, Dick made Batman evolve into the Batman we know and expect today.

Batman’s relationship with the police significantly improved after Dick Grayson debuted as Robin. Batman’s relationship with other Justice Leaguers improved after Dick Grayson debuted as Robin. Batman’s relationship with Wonder Woman and especially Superman/Clark Kent improved after Robin.

So let’s remove Dick from the lineup and stick him at the end as the youngest then. And... put Damian as the eldest son... that’s... not going to work.

Hey Damian. Where did you go?

Remember the timeline. Without Dick as the eldest Bruce can continue to be reckless. Batman was a suicide mission until Robin stepped in.

No Dick? Batman continues to be reckless. Reckless Batman? Dead Batman. The Al Ghuls and the League of Shadows/Assassins? Probably would have nuked Gotham and Bludhaven. Also Damian Wayne will not have his male genetic donor because... Without Dick Grayson as the eldest son/brother? Batman would not have survived to catch the eye of the League of Shadows/Assassins.

It is necessary for Dick to be the ‘eldest son’ otherwise the rest of Bat!Lore will not fall into place. Dick was Bruce’s more traditionally heroic foil from the start without which we would have a dead Bruce Wayne before Batman could take off. 

TLDR:

Robin was created as Dick’s Tribute to his dead family. If Dick wasn’t the oldest - Batman’s partner (if he would even have one!) would NOT be called Robin.

Bruce and Dick met very early into his career as Batman. If they didn’t meet Bruce would have carried on his reckless path and possibly DIED before Damian could even be ‘conceived’.

And that, my friends, is the tea.

Tagging @theflyingwonder as inspiration of this particular meta

[spacemilkies]

Bart Allen x reader

summary: He’d ran to the past purely by the determination to unselfishly prevent the future from fallling into ruin.

For that for that act of valor, wasn’t he allowed this one selfish want ?

Notes: It took me awhile to come up with something. Sorry for the lateness. Here’s a little snippet drabble thing.

When he’d first appeared he wasn’t quite sure who was more surprised. Naturally he managed to send the premature flock of superheroes into a mild panic.

That wasn’t entirely intentional. So far into the future calculations were somewhat accurate at best. Nathaniel had planned for the when, but the where was more abstract in nature.

So yes, Bart was equally as astonished to not only find the machine in working order but to find himself at the center control panel of Mount Justice?

Now that was crash.

All his idols were in attendance.

The creative and instinct driven Beast Boy.

The premature and determined Robin.  

And oh man, the notorious Nightwing in the flesh.

And then there was you.

For a moment Bart wished for nothing more than looser suit to drag away the spandex from red itch crawling up his neck. The poster on his wall had depicted you as an older hero, matured in both your talents and prowess. But there had been plenty of opportunities for him to imagine what it might have been like to fight beside you.

Share the excitement and spoils of victory.

If only he’d been born a few decades earlier.

If only you hadn’t-

The time capsule hero jerked in response,“Careful now, watch the claws!”

As part of the infamous Allen lineage, all speedsters relied on that split second decision where time slowed to their advantage.

It separated life from death.

Freedom from capture.

“Now that would have not been crash. Seriously Robin ? I have your action figure man. “

Bart shook a non threatening fist from his perch atop the massive screen. He’d narrowly managed to avoid quick shot of cable. The young hero hadn’t even been aware of his speed inclement yet smartly chose to go after his legs.

He couldn’t put it past the detective.

It was obvious that his window of opportunity would have dwindled. During his fanboy episode the startlement had worn off.

And now he was outnumbered.

… yet still a little crash.

Yeah, he expected to feel the mode shortly after.

But damn did he enjoy going head to head with the best of the best.

Sure, they were still in their youth and nothing compared to what they would be in the future but damn wasn’t it still a thrill.

No one could blame him for at least attempting to shift out of the bindings. His vibrations only managed to encourage the current Robin to tighten the ropes further.

Bart wasn’t entirely certain that he hadn’t taken a bit of pleasure in the act.

“You’re from the future? Ha, right dude.”

Bart’s attention whipped over to the green meta human, taking in the distinctively furry texture of his skin. Funnily it had been a small detail the cameras managed to miss when capturing his likeness.

“Oh man, Beastboy if only I could get started on you.” Unfortunately, Bart had seen enough movies depicting the consequences of speaking so openly about what was to come.

No, he would need to be sensible here.

Regardless of how easy it would be to drag these chump- eh- heroic deities.

“Look, no hard feelings. I’m one of you!” His hand twitched from the desire to bring it to his chest in emphasis. “ Name’s Bart Allen. You know, of the Barry Allen legacy? Really, the speed should have been an indicator.”

Among the skeptical faces it was yours he kept darting to the most. He couldn’t help it. You were just so young and so here.

And right in front-

Oh well … was right in front of him before Robin had taken the initiative to cut in between, effectively severing the point of contact.

Bart would have been more baffled had he not understood the root of the protective stance.

It didn’t help that bat family was incredibly rich.

They just had to be eligible bachelors to boot.

Speaking of the family, where had the older bat flown off to?

“Dude if you’re honest we can figure this out. And then you can go.”

Bart tried extremely hard not to roll his eyes but it was painful. The littlest bat really needed to brush up on his interrogations. The summation of this little group was only the junior leagues.

Once he really got started talking they were going to have to draw out the majors.

“What if he is? It wouldn’t be the craziest thing to happen here,” your voice trilled over silence.

Okay, maybe crossing spacial dimensions was a little different but it was the future! He obviously shared some connection to the Flash- grandson did he say?

All you were saying is that you couldn’t rule out the impossible without considering the possibility.

Your gaze flickered uncertainly to the bulky machine sitting like a quiet observer.

Beside you Robin scuffed I’m firm disbelief. Granted it too a lot to get the junior detective to think outside of the realm of possible. You were starting to think he was being a bit close minded.

The two of them had barley known one another for twenty minutes and you could already feel the bad blood thrumming under the veins. It was obvious that Bart knew something they didn’t but was it so inherent that Tim would react out of instinct ?

“Not you too,” he groaned. He caught your eyes from the side. “A tourist ?”

Okay, that was an odd thing to call oneself given the situation. It was hard to determine what was more concerning.

That fact that a kid would travel so lightheartedly into the past without considering the consequences or how easily accessible it was for him to do so.

Beastboy settles his arms across his chest,”I don’t know man. I mean, yeah, I’m green but from the future? That’s a little crazy.”

“Batman will deal with him,” Tim reasoned under his breath.

As subtly as you could, you reached for him, finger tips just skimming the callouses of his own. While his face didn’t portray emotion, your loose grip tingled with the ripple of calm you were trying to make mutual.

Unbeknownst to you, the red haired speedster followed the minuscule movement with a grimace.

“Easy, Robin. If he travel from the future he must have accumulated quite the thirst. Barry’s grandson, right? That’s quite the journey.”

Bart watched Nightwing with interest as he reapplied with a glass of water in hand. Bringing his tied hands up, he accepted it with a shallow nod. He was a little thirsty but more in the lack of proper clean water kind of way and less of a time travel exhaustion.

It wasn’t until he’d taken a few sips before the subtle insinuation of the offer became apparent.

Now he was realizing how one graduated out of the Robin role.

“Ah, you’re not really worried about the culprit. You just want this.” Bart probably added more of the wanted specimen than necessary when he spit heartily into the glass much to the grimaced disgust of some of the observers. “There you go. Authentic DNA of the Allen family. Just don’t go cloning anyone.”

His gaze widened comically at the thought. “Oh man, that’d be so crash though. Surely Dick Grayson could figure out the proper cloning sequence. Just ask Connor.”

It had started off as a joke and tumbled horridly into a snowball effect after that. What could he say? Once he got started talking, it was just downhill from there.

To say the hero was affronted would be putting it off lightly.

“I know all of you guys? Future guy remember ?”

He gestured to each member individually.

“Dick Grayson.”

“Garfield Logan.”

“Newly appointed Robin, Tim Drake.”

And then there was you. Your eyes were already comically wide by this point as if already knowing your fate.

It didn’t matter really. He was immediately overshadowed by Beast- Garfield was who didn’t find it very crash to be the last one to get he knowledge party.

By the end of it all, he’d left the heroes more confused than the moment he’d arrived.

His ride had unfortunately arrived before he alleviate some of their obvious worries. The tell tale sound of the dimensional portal gate called out the name of another rememberable hero, but he was already shaking past the restraints before the computer could finish the introduction.

Besides he had his own history to change.

And somehow managed to alter his own future in the midst of it.

With the current Flash properly save and hopefully alive in his future, he was more than ready to return to a brighter more lively lifestyle.

When he returned, you were all better prepared for his arrival. Not so much for the older man that ‘Impule’ had hastily referred to as his great grandfather with no little excitement and current Flash and Kid Flash in tow.

It was like a backwards family reunion.

Nightwing’s analytical results had proved the impossible, well possible. Bart Allen was a direct descendant of the Allen family.

The red haired future superhero seemed to take the news with the strongest stride, not doubting his truth for a second. Part of you felt for him, this had to be his only chance to properly meet the senior Flash.

Regrettably, the meeting was cut relatively short as his urge to go home out ran the present desires. He was still an erratic variable of the future and had no place here.

A few hugs were exchanged amongst family, the current leagued Flash expressing his anticipation on meeting him again in a proper timeline.

You found yourself longing for the same. Eager to see his origin and watching the child become what you’d witnessed today.

“Well this has been crash, but gotta run.”

God, were you not looking forward to the puns though. A mutual groan rumbled amongst the gathered crowd in agreement.

Impulse had nearly disappeared into the awaiting machine before his body staled as if forgetting something. After saving the life of a hero you couldn’t imagine what other time altering event he could have on his agenda.

Then his gaze locked with yours.  

Your hair fluttered behind you from the sharp gust of wind from, a noise of shock barely escaping your lips before his swallowed it down.

Somewhere behind you the sound of Tim’s shock tried to reach you but it was lost to the soft press of lips molding against your own.

Then it was over.

And you were left wading in a pool of soft baby blues.

“Oh man, I wish you could have married me instead of Drake.”

And left you stranded.

“Now I should really get going. Be nice to me in the future!”

He raced back to the machine with a sloppy salute, before sliding inside the machine. The only sound it gave was a clank of metal as the latch sealed.

And then the silence stretched on for several seconds.

“Isn’t he supposed to be in the future by now,” Garfield asked unhelpfully.

“He better be.” You felt Tim appear at your back, his growl echoing a darker intent.

There was a drawn out groan, as the metal protested the slow opening of the door. It was likely the slowest you’d ever seen and of the speedsters move as Bart reluctantly stepped out of the machine.

Something told you he wouldn’t be returning home anytime soon.

A sheepish smile pulled at his lips as his gaze darted across the room.  

“Anyone else feeling the mode?”

[nuage-s-den]

Oooh shit I got so many Birdflash songs.....buuutttt I think I will say Sloppy Seconds by Watsky? somethin bout these lyrics makes me feel somethin birdflash: “It's September in my kitchen in a Christmas sweater / Sipping cold coffee on the phone with damaged goods / And there is not a single place that I would rather be / I'm fucked up just like you are, and you're fucked up just like me”

Thank you so much for the suggestion! Here’s what my mind pictured as I listened to the song, I hope you like it. :)

   Wally was a hoarder.

 A mountain of cardboard boxes containing many and varied objects filled his attic, and he loved to go through them when he felt like visiting the past.

    A mess of strange knick-knacks surrounded him as he sat cross-legged on the floor.  Wally was carefully examining a dishevelled yellow hoodie which he was pretty sure he could not fit anymore. The cloth looked like one of those homemade ugly Christmas sweaters, with a duckling patchworked on the front and whose eyes seemed to resent him. There was a big stain splashed over the patchwork, and it took a lick for Wally to recognize the faint taste of pizza. He was a true detective, that one.

Fumbling into the pockets, he found a wrinkled picture of him and his best friend singing.

Ah yes, now he remembered.

    If there was one rule that existed among the Titans, it was that no one could miss the “special Birthday nights.” Each month, the Titans would take one night off of their duties to reunite and celebrate the months’ babies. The team always looked forward these nights, as it allowed them to act their ages and not worry about the world ending at any moment. Sometimes the group would gather around the couch, stuff their mouths with pizza and watch movies until they fell asleep. Other times they would go to the beach and make a giant bond fire. 

    And yes, once they were old enough, they would share a couple of drinks.

Wally, while his metabolism did not allow him to get drunk, loved to observe his teammates and friends’ behaviour change when downing one too many drinks. The people of Atlantis were always hit first, and he suspected it might have been due to their different body structure. The first time they saw Garth succumb to the alcohol had been a shock to the younger team. It happened in the span of a blink; one second Garth was talking to Roy with a beer in his hand and the next he was lying on the floor completely unconscious. 

    There was someone Wally loved to observe in these parties the most: Dick Grayson. 

    Dick was his best friend and, at least in Wally’s mind, a dictionary didn’t have enough words to describe his personality. Confident, a born leader, a bit bossy, playful, flexible, annoying, loud, discreet, sneaky, touchy, people pleaser, pretty, charming, sometimes distant, experienced, a bit fucked up (but who wasn’t nowadays?)… However “shy” was not a word that came to anyone’s mind when thinking of the Dick Grayson. 

   And yet, when given time to stir with some alcohol, Dick would unintentionally shed his persona and become a completely different person. At that point, most of the team were way too wasted to even notice the change, but Wally easily picked on the way his best friend’s shoulders stood closer to his ears. He noticed how Dick sat a little farther from the group and observed the others instead of doing some wicked backflips while Roy attempted to toss popcorn in his mouth, which was what Roy kept suggesting they do. At first, Wally thought Dick was uncomfortable or unsure on how to act around drunk friends, but Dick always denied it when Wally pointed this out, and he would claim that he was just tired or use some other lie. 

    Not only was his body language different, but the way he looked at Wally betrayed how he felt toward the speedster. While they usually acted oblivious to their feelings for each other, they both longed for a deeper connection but were too afraid to take the next step. The two of them were often seen playfully flirt each other, gaining loud annoyed groans from the rest of the team. These nights weren’t any exceptions. Sitting next to each other a little closer than usual, leaning into the other’s personal space enough that they could smell the alcohol in the other’s breath, Wally loved to tease his best friend. Instead of using witty, smart-mouthed replies to his flirt, Dick’s cheeks would turn rosy, and his voice would stutter over simple words.

One night, however, Wally had to step in to help his best friend who was stuck in an embarrassing situation.

    Donna and Kori had announced they never had gone karaoke and requested this to be the main event of the December Birthday night. Wally could still recall the matching sweaters they had made for the night, ugly birds on flashy hoodies that they had put together one late morning in the Tower’s kitchen. It took them three pots of coffee to get the darn things done before the evening, and they were ridiculously proud of it. To the others? It was a painful eyesore. 

    While it took a couple drinks for most of them to go full on and singing off-key multiple hits and indie songs alike, Dick skillfully redirected any attention he was given by requesting encores and suggesting other people do duets. Even though it worked for most of the night, the girls managed to finally corner him and forced him to stand in front of everyone, mic on hands and all eyes set on him. 

“Uhm,” the former Robin started, “I’m not sure this is-”

Roy, his voice hoarse from yelling too much while interpreting The 12 Days of Christmas, interrupted him. “Go get them, Dickie!“ 

    Standing awkwardly rigid in the light, Dick looked like a terrified deer hypnotized in the headlights. His mouth felt dry, and he wasn’t sure if his friends would believe him if he blamed it on the couple drinks he had. One of his hands fumbled with the poofy bird on his sweater. Then, his ears caught on the piano notes announcing the beginning of the song. Previously beating with aggressivity against his chest, his heart decided to suddenly stop as the lyrics flashed in front of his wide blue eyes. Petrified, Dick was confident his pale skin betrayed his lack of oxygen intake. 

   At the same time, Wally felt a pang in his chest and wanted to get his best friend out of the stage and hug the fear away from his slim body. Wally felt torn between following his instinct or listening to the intellectual part of his brain cautioning him that it would make their friends suspicious of something. But as Dick was standing there, looking like a complete stranger, weren’t their friends already realizing something was off with their leader?

   They were already thirty seconds into the song before Wally acted. Before anyone could say anything, the speedster began to read the lyrics aloud. His tone and rhythm were off as he adjusted to the beat of the song, standing up proudly as all eyes were now set on him. Grabbing a second microphone, Wally walked to his best friend’s side whose eyes openly reflected his confusion. Wally smiled at him, keeping eye contact and catching in an embrace to press him close against his body. He felt Dick’s muscles relax, felt him breathe again until he was finally able to mumble some of the words out. Some of their friends began cheering, and quickly everyone joined in singing. 

Among the cacophony and inattention, Dick pulled himself closer to Wally, his hand holding onto the ugly duckling sweater, and placed a quick kiss on his cheek. One kiss that the speedster would later learn had opened the door for many more to come.