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#anyway this was probably not the answer you expected but it is what it is
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James Potter x best friend!fem!reader
Summary: James panics when he sees what his boggart is.
Genre: hurt and comfort
Warnings: mentions/descriptions of reader's death, crying, panic attacks, swearing
~ anon, this idea was amazing! thank you ☺️ ~
James's arrogance is his Achilles's Heel.
He truly can't help it sometimes—especially now when that arrogance is accompanied by his friends' laughter as he teases everyone about their stupid boggarts. Emma Johnstons' was a spider, which scared Peter, but had Sirius and James in tears at the back of the classroom.
"Wait until it's your turn, Potter," an annoyed Emma hisses as she walks by them, still pale from fright and embarrassment. She sends James a murderous look and continues, "Then we'll see who's laughing in the end."
James's grin only widens and he sees her words as a challenge. His hand shoots up in the air and he bounces on his heels. "Oi! Professor?! Can I be next?!" 
Professor Windward looks at him behind his small glasses, already exhausted by James's antics but he allows him to walk up to the front of the classroom anyway. James sends his best friends an obnoxiously confident wink and struts up to the front of the line.
James isn't in any way prepared for his boggart. 
He's expected something mundane—like an animal, or even death eater—or maybe some scary creature he'd read about in library books. What he didn't expect was to see you, dressed in your uniform and robe, your shiny hair sprawled across the wooden floor-board as blood slowly dripped from your mouth.
Your eyes are round but they're lifeless and your clothes are soaked in crimson liquid. You aren't moving and it looks too real that, for a moment, James is completely frozen. 
He hears the whispers of his classmates—whispers of your name and reminders of your relationship with James. Friends, the word rings around the classroom just as James's mind breaks and he completely panics at your body on the ground in front of him. 
He drops his wand, breaking into an awkward run to where you lay, entirely prepared to skid across the floor and hold you in his arms, but Professor Windward is quicker. He grabs James by his collar and pulls him back, his arms encasing around James's shoulders as he makes the boggart disappear with another spell. 
It seemed too cruel to turn the image of your dead body into something ridiculous. 
No one in the room is laughing, not even Emma Johnston, as James makes a pained sound and attempts to shove past Professor Windward and hold you like he'd planned. His mind is racing and he's panicked as the sounds around him make him feel like he's trapped underwater.
"Son, it's a boggart. It cannot hurt you. It's not real," Professor Windward explains, his grip on James firm, but James doesn't seem to understand him. Sirius, Remus, and Peter are beside James in an instant, holding him up and comforting him. 
Without much convincing, Professor Windward lets them lead him outside into the corridor and down the stairs. James is a mess and he keeps looking around for danger or you. His mind screams at him that he's being unreasonable, that it wasn't real and he knows this, but his heart is in a complete panic. 
"Prongs, hey, it's okay," Remus tries to explain as James's hand tightens in Sirius's. "She's probably in her dorm—she's okay."
"Should we take him to her?" Peter squeaks, looking between his friends with concern. 
"No–"
"Yes–" James interrupts Remus's answer and he turns to Sirius, his eyes round and desperate. "I wanna see her. Please. I wanna see her now. I need to know she's okay!" Remus doesn't think it's smart to bring James to see you when he's like this but Sirius can never deny James what he wants so all the boys pile into the door to the Common Room and then quite obnoxiously, James and Sirius start to scream your name as Peter rushes up to their dorm to find the map. 
A moment later, when you still haven't answered, Peter scampers back down from their dorm and holds up the map. "She's in the library," he says breathlessly. Sirius jumps up, snatching the map from Peter's hands.
"Onwards," he shouts in an attempt to lighten the mood but that only earns him a sniffle from James and a glare from Remus. 
* * * 
You're peacefully unaware of the chaos that's about to ensue as you're curled up in an armchair, a book in your lap. You absentmindedly chew on your lower lip as you concentrate. 
"Y/n!" a familiar boy screams your name and you look up, sitting normally in the armchair as your four very anxious looking friends stumble in front of you. "Look, she's okay," Peter points, sounding relieved as well as he moves aside to reveal a very distressed looking James Potter. 
You stand up, dusting your uniform and your eyebrows crease. "What's happened?" you ask seriously and then you feel James's arms wrap around your shoulders as he pulls you into him. His lips find the exposed skin of your collarbone as he inhales your scent and almost crushes you closer to him. 
James's always been an affectionate person. Since you can remember, he's never not taken an opportunity to kiss your cheek, wrap his arms around you, or even hold your hand, but this is extreme even for him. You glance at the other boys, confusion evident on your expression, and they send you sympathetic looks. 
"Jamie," you whisper and hug him back, your hand hesitating but ultimately finding his hair. 
You hear a choked cry and you realize he's almost in tears. Concern overwhelms your senses and you pull away only to have James's hand find yours. His eyes are shiny with tears and, as if he's reminding himself, he mutters, "You're alive." His thumb caresses your palm. 
"You two should talk," Remus interrupts bluntly and sends Sirius, who seems entertained by the scene in front of him, a sharp glare, "Alone." Remus pulls Sirius away, ignoring the latter's hump of protest as Peter trails behind them.  
James doesn't seem to care as he stares at you, he looks much calmer now. 
"What do you mean? Of course I'm alive." you ask gently, pressing your palm to his cheek. 
He leans into your touch. "I saw you dead. In Defense Against The Dark Arts. Professor Windward was showing us boggarts and it was funny until it was my turn and that dreadful thing turned into your lifeless body, right there in front of me, and—and I didn't know what to do because I realized if you died, I would just have to die too," James explains, sounding like he's made up his mind if the scenario ever comes up. 
Boggarts? James's biggest fear was your death? You can hear the sincerity in his voice and you can't help the way your heart jumps for his. 
"Does that make you the Romeo to my Juliet?"
James frowns and asks, "Who?" which reminds you that James hadn't heard of some muggle writer like Shakspeare and that even if he had taken Muggle Studies last year, like he was supposed to, he wouldn't have listened that intently anyway.  
"Star-crossed lovers," you shrug, ignoring how warm your cheeks have become. 
James's shoulders relax and he chuckles. "So, you're saying we're star-crossed lovers now?"
You like that your little quip has lightened the mood successfully so you shrug again, deciding to tease him. "Never said that. Why? D'you want to be star-crossed lovers?"
"No. Because I don't want our relationship to be doomed," James deadpans and he runs a hand in his curly hair nervously. He looks behind you through the stained glass window of the library and hears the soft patterns of afternoon rain. "It's raining," he says and he moves closer, his hand finding yours again as he fiddles with your fingers.
"It appears so," you answer in a whisper. You look at him, trying to read him. You squeeze his hand. "I'm right here, James. 'M not going anywhere."
A moment of comfortable silence passes and James looks so serious as he stares into your eyes, his breathing becoming harsh again. He leans in and he's wearing the same look on his face every man does before he kisses someone—only James Potter wears it well. Your breath hitches and your eyes flutter shut, nerves bubbling in your stomach.  
When his lips touch yours they're accompanied by his hands around your jaw. He's gentle with you, kissing you like he's savoring your touch. He pulls away only to press his forehead on yours.
"Merlin's beard, I've wanted to do that for so long. You're intoxicating, Y/n," he whispers as if he's just made a revelation and he takes your chin in between his thumb and index, smiling like the love-sick fool he's always been. 
"I really like you."
Your eyes widen. "You do?"
James's smile turns into a smirk. "Yeah, 'course I do. Was that kiss not enough confirmation?" He raises an eyebrow and leans in again, this time peppering open mouth kisses across my entire face, "Here. I really really really like you," he mumbles and enjoys the sound of your giggles as you shy away from his kisses. 
"I really like you too," you say, finally escaping his kisses as James pulls away. He looks over the moon happy.
"The boys are never gonna believe this," James mutters, completely unaware that unlike him, it hadn't taken Sirius, Peter, and Remus this incident for them to realize James is madly in love with you. They'd known from the first time James had uttered your name. 
"Shit, you're already the best girlfriend I've ever had—not that I've had many," James says, almost to himself as he tucks some hair behind your ear. 
You laugh, wrapping your arms around his neck. "Woah, slow down there. Take me on a date first, then we'll talk about labels," you joke, knowing damn well that by the end of the date James would be proclaiming his love for you to everyone who would listen and you don't mind one bit. 
James's eyes shimmer at the opportunity to spoil you. "You have a deal, m'lady."
You laugh. "Merlin, you're so cringe, James." You take his arm and pull him towards the window where a bunch of pillows are laid out on the edge and you plop down, momentarily looking out the window at the rain.
James follows your lead and when he leans against the wall, you lay your head on his chest and rest in between his legs. 
"Stay with me for a bit?" you ask.
His heart feels like it's fluttering at your closeness and he's completely calm—the memory of your dead body completely distant now. It's now a memory he'll only remember in the dead of night, when he'll have you to hold him and kiss all his worries away. 
James nods and then he leans his head on the wall and looks outside, his hand playing with your hair as you hum and continue to read your book. The soft sound of rain is like a piano melody as he watches the droplets fall down the glass. They're racing in his mind like they would when he was a child and he smiles. 
He kisses the top of your head, earning him a giggle as he mouths, "I love you," into your hair. 
One day soon he'll say the words out loud, just not now.
Today, he's happy just being near you and knowing that he finally has you in some significant way—in a way he'd denied himself for way too long. 
You nuzzle in him and turn your page, your gaze so focused, and his heart swells. 
I love you, he thinks again. I love you so damn much. 
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chaosandmarigolds · 2 days
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Could we see a "Beauty and the Beast"-style plot, where the protagonist is a sweet new doctor at the base, and Simon falls in love with her for her kindness? And everyone else at the base is just stunned by the performances she gives to her and no one else.
(I WANT TO WRITE I WANT TO WRITE IT BUT I NO HAVE TIME-)
Anyway, so this will be in the same lil format as Eek has been in- short lil segments whenever I get time to bc I HAVE PLOT and I’m just too busy to sit down and write a whole whooping 20,000 word story so instead-
As an EMT I feel qualified to write a medic (kinda sorta) but all the same, if I mess something up that’s my bad yall, I’m just dumb
Let’s begin!
-
“And any medical history I should know about?” He stared down at you, almost bewildered by the standard question you had probably been trained to ask for years. He didn’t want to have to call ems however since Johnny had been an idiot and crashed the car they didn’t get much choice, he had patiently waited with his slightly bruised arm and a cigarette. Since the accident was so close to base they had just dispatched the medic team. What he didn’t expect was you, bright eyed even thought is was early morn and your voice oh so soft.
“nothin that’s not on ma file.”
you hum to the answer and warm your stethoscope back around your neck, as the answer wasn’t exactly wrong, as you were very well accustomed with all of their fields. You nod, “I’m just gonna give you a quick little assessment, will you tell me if it hurts anywhere?”
Simon nods to that, straightening his posture as you stand, blue latex gloves feeling down his spine and quickly frisking his legs before going back to his arm. Your touch was gentle, experienced- he respected that.
“Okie dokey,” you mumbles and then kneel back down, looking at your bag and then back to the man, “I’ll give you some meds and splint when we back base. Is there anything buggin ya?”
he then nods, “Yes there is.”
to that you immediately look up from your bag, waiting for what he was going to say.
“When did you start?”
“I was transferred from New York about a week ago, it’s so pretty. Anyway! Let’s get you to the ambulance, would you like to get me the stretcher?”
“no no, Johnny need it more.”
you let out a little laugh to that comment, as it was a good joke taking how Johnny was very dramatically playing up the minor laceration on his forehead. “Perhaps so, Lieutenant, however you are my patient so you are my priority- please, how can I help you?” You smile at the end, a sweet gleam in your eyes and genuine intention shining.
If his pupils weren’t already dilated they were then, if he wasn’t already tachycardic he would be then, if he could induce psychogenic shock just to make sure you wouldn’t leave his side he might just do so. He certain…he was certain within that moment you would be the death of him.
(Um….yeah, I’m eepy, but!!! This had been brewing for so long and I felt bad so I’m so sorry!! I hope this is kinda what you were looking for! Toodles!)
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the longest damn late night phone call from heaven EVER
aka, Emily has a slightly gruesome favor to ask, Charlie's determined to be good and helpful friend, and Vaggie was only half-right about people not recognizing her without her exorcist mask
Charlie: “…not exactly what I expected, when dad said heaven wanted another chat.”
Emily: “I know, I’m sorry- I didn’t mean to bother you at home-”
Charlie: “It’s fine. Kinda late for a video call but, hold on.” (slips into hallway) (quietly shuts bedroom door) “It’s important right?”
Emily: “It’s… it’s important to me.”
Charlie: “Well that counts! What’s up? Uh, aside from literally you, anyway.”
Emily: “Before that, is your girlfriend- is Vaggie okay?”
Charlie: “She’s.”
Charlie: “……”
Charlie: “…fine.”
Emily: “There were a lot of bandages.”
Charlie: “Oh. Those.”
Emily: “I wasn’t trying to look, but when you were going past of bed, I just. I’ve never seen one of us like-”
Charlie: “Um I don’t think she’d really like the ‘one of us’ part. Just a heads up.”
Emily: “I’ll remember. Will they heal? Lute’s arm already has, and she said angelic steel is what- what killed that first Exorcist-”
Charlie: “Some of them- Some of them will heal, Vaggie says.”
Emily: “And the others?”
Charlie: “They’ll… probably be like her eye, I guess. The bleeding will stop.”
Emily: “Her eye-?”
Charlie: “Did you know Lute gouged it out with a sword? Right before leaving her in hell?”
Emily: “She- No! Why would she-”
Charlie: “So you didn’t know what Vaggie was when you saw her. You didn’t know what Lute and Adam did to her-”
Emily: “Charlie I SWEAR I had no idea. The Exorcists- other than Lute they keep those masks on almost all time, even up here! I could have walked past Vaggie a hundred times without knowing it!”
Charlie: “….that’s what she said too.”
Emily: “Vaggie?”
Charlie: “Mm.”
Emily: “Why ask me then? She told you and you trust her… right?”
Charlie: “It’s, complicated. And not the point.”
Emily: “Are you two okay-”
Charlie: “Not the point. What can I help heaven with tonight? I’d, kinda like to get back to bed before she wakes up.”
Emily: “Sorry, of course, I just don’t want you two to have more trouble…” (sighs) “…but I guess I’m not the right person to help am I. Not with, all this.”
Charlie: “I don’t blame you for what Lute and Adam did. Or for Sera letting them do it.”
Emily: “It still makes being friends hard, doesn’t it?”
Charlie: “…a little.”
Emily: “I’m-”
Charlie: “But! I’m not gonna let them stop us from doing it.” (determined) “Screw heaven- I wouldn’t have answered the phone if it’d been anyone other than you calling from up there anyway! Well, you or Sir Pentious.”
Emily: “I’m so, SO glad he made it here. ”
Charlie: “Me too.” (smiles) “You need help with something? Tell me. If I can do anything about it, I will.”  
Emily: “Oh it’s nothing like that, it’s just… a question.”
Charlie: “Okay?”
Emily: “….”
Charlie: “….”
Emily: “…I’m a little scared to ask.”
Charlie: “That’s okay! I know the feeling! If it helps, I promise I won’t get angry or annoyed just over you asking something!”
Emily: “Thanks. That’s. Not really what I’m scared of.”
Charlie: “Well what parts the scary part?”
Emily: “The answer.”
Charlie: “...huh.”
Emily: “I’m not sure I want to hear it, honestly.”
Charlie: “But you called in the middle of the night so you could ask?”
Emily: “Yes.”
Charlie: “So you DO want to know.”
Emily: “It feels more like I have to know.”
Charlie: “Okay…. uhh. What… kind of question is it?”
Emily: “The battle. The, dead Exorcists.”
Charlie: “Oh fuck. Shoot- Is it about the bodies? Because I’m REALLY sorry again about letting the cannibals uh, eat them. I’d kinda. I’d promised them- the cannibals I mean- and, um. They lost a lot of friends too so-”
Emily: “No that’s fine. It’s, it doesn’t matter much once they’re dead does it. S-someone should get to be happy about the fresh. Um. Meat.”
Charlie: “Ssssstillll, I wish I could’ve sent them back-”
Emily: “Did you see-?”
Charlie: “-whoops sorry, go ahead.”
Emily: “….”
Charlie: “….”
Emily: “….”
Charlie: “Ah-hem. Go ahead?”
Emily: “…”
Charlie: “Aaaaany time now…”
Emily: “…”
Charlie: “….Look, Emily-”
Emily: “I know I’m sorry I-”
Charlie: “No no! I really wish I had all night for this. Really! I wanna be the friend who sits up until four in morning talking- and any other time I would be!”
Emily: “I know.”
Charlie: “Only I also really, really don’t want Vaggie waking up alone tonight. Not after we, after I- I can’t do that to her right now, okay?”
Emily: “…yes. Okay.”
Charlie: “How about this- you call back in the morning, we settle in and-”
Emily: “Did you see an Exorcist that didn’t fit in?”
Charlie: “-uhhh, what?”
Emily: “An Exorcist.”
Charlie: “I mean, yes? There were dozens! Pretty hard to keep count when you’re fighting for you-”
Emily: “But was there one that didn’t fit in?”
Charlie: “Fit in what where- oh ugh Angel Dust get OUT of my head-”
Emily: “With the others. The other Exorcists. Was there one in the fight that, didn’t quite look right? Caught your eye for some reason?”
Charlie: “Don’t they all kinda look the same?”
Emily: “Yes. Mostly.”
Charlie: “Bloodstained uniform, horned mask, weird crossed out eye and stitched mouth aesthetic thing, scary black and white wings-”
Emily: “Did the cannibals eat the wings?”
Charlie: “The w-”
Emily: “The wings of the dead Exorcists. Did they eat-”
Charlie: “Emily- those are feathers. The cannibals ate the meaty parts sure, but-”
Emily: “So you could still check. If. If any of the Exorcists who died. If they had strange wings.”
Charlie: “I guess, I-”
Emily: “Charlie. I need you to check.”
Charlie: “What-”
Emily: “I just need to know-”
Charlie: “But-”
Emily: “-please-”
Charlie: “Hey it’s okay, I’ll check! I’ll check first thing tomorrow!”
Emily: “Promise?”
Charlie: “Of course! It’ll be easy, don’t worry! Vaggie saved the wings from all of them. I’m not sure what for- some kind of funeral I think- or target practice- funerary target practice? Is that an angel thing…?”
Emily: “We don’t….really have those in Heaven. Funerals.”
Charlie: “Oh. Right.”
Charlie: “…”
Charlie: “Must be nice.”
Emily: “I’m sorry.”
Charlie: “No- that came out wrong. Forget it! So the wing thing is just a Vaggie thing or something. Anyway. Checking the wings. Nooooo problem. CAN do.”
Emily: “Thank you. And. And you’ll just tell me about it? Not anyone else in heaven?”
Charlie: “Sure! Is it a secret?”
Emily: “No.”
Charlie: “Buuuut you don’t want Sera finding out.”
Emily: “I’ll tell her later. When I’m… Once I’ve…”
Emily: “…”
Charlie: “Oh Emily hey- it’s okay! Shh, it’s okay!!”
Emily: “I don’t know if it is.” (voice breaking) “Sera won’t let me near the Exorcists and Lute won’t answer any questions about them- I don’t know who else to ask or if I really want to know, but I can’t sleep, and if she didn’t die down there then I NEED to find her somehow and ask her HOW she could’ve been doing this! Murdering people, killing souls-”
Charlie: “Whoa wait, ask who? What am I even checking the Exorcist wings for?”
Charlie: “… Who…who are you looking for?”
Emily: “I don’t know her name. We never met.”
Charlie: “You seem to really care about her, for someone you’ve never met.”
Emily: “Because she was DIFFERENT! She-”
Emily: (looks away)
Emily: “…she’s part of why I never questioned the Exorcists. She. I thought she was proof that underneath masks, they meant well. That they were strict and distant but also protectors, and they cared, and…”
Charlie: “…and now you know what she was doing the whole time.”
Emily: “She CAN’T have been. You shouldn’t be able to be so kind and gentle and still-”
Charlie: “People can be a lot of different things, to different people.”
Emily: “How?”
Charlie: “That’s just… what makes people, people, I think. We can all do things we never thought we’d do.”
Emily: “Exorcists kill children don’t they. Child sinners- they don’t spare them, do they?”
Charlie: “They don’t really DO the whole ‘sparing’ thing. Not in the Pride Ring. Only my dad’s family is safe from exterminations- or was safe. Kids… if they don’t have anyone, or if their families can’t keep them safe, then…” (shudders) “…yeah. I’ve. I found the bodies a few times.”
Emily: “How… how can they-”
Charlie: “I don’t know.” (tired) (slumping back against the door) “They just do.”
Emily: “She can’t have done that! That’s the ONE thing I know about her- she LOVED children. Falling in line and being a good Exorcist didn’t matter as soon as a child needed her!”
Charlie: “Well- well maybe she wasn’t one of the ones who… hurt kids. Maybe she didn’t do that.”
Emily: “But she must have seen it happening. Known it happened. And she didn’t stop it.”
Charlie: (wince) “T- tell me about her? The parts you saw up in heaven, her being nice to those kids- that happened too! What was she like?”
Emily: “…watchful.”
Charlie: “A guardian angel huh?” (smiles weakly) “I think I know the type.”
Emily: “She should’ve been that. She shouldn’t have-” (sighs) “…Exorcists keep to themselves, up in heaven.”
Charlie: (grits teeth) “If they’re mostly all like Lute then that’s probably the only way to keep heaven a nice place.”
Emily: “Lute isn’t… well I guess I don’t really know her either. I always thought she was just paranoid, busy being overprepared, scared for heaven and channeling it into anger…. maybe she is that? Maybe she just-”
Charlie: “She tried stabbing out Vaggie’s other eye.”
Emily: “….”
Emily: “A lot of things make sense now, knowing what she and Adam were doing.”
Charlie: “Like keeping the Exorcists separate?”
Emily: “That, and the identical uniforms, the masks… the constant, BRUTAL training and practice.”
Charlie: “Building trust in a warzone….”
Emily: “What?”
Charlie: “Nothing- How did any of them get near a kid, if that’s what it’s like?”
Emily: “They didn’t. It was an accident.”
Charlie: “Now THAT’S depressing.”
Emily: “I guess so..”
Charlie: “…”
Charlie: “So. What happened?”
Emily: “Oh… some children were testing their wings. Just out having fun, you know. A few flew out of sight- their friends tried looking for them, but there are parts of heaven not everyone can always reach.”
Charlie: “There is? Why-”
Emily: “Heaven’s supposed to be a peaceful, happy place. An eternity of rest and recovery- It’s supposed to be safe. To be safe, Sera always said the Exorcists needed to be ready to defend it, and they needed space to not always be happy or peaceful.”
Charlie: “They always seemed pretty happy about not being peaceful, not gonna lie.”
Emily: “They get really into training with each other- but do you mean, even during the exterminations-?”
Charlie: “ESPECIALLY then.”
Emily: (frustrated) “I wish things would stop making so much sense!”
Charlie: “Same.”
Emily: “It was right there all along, and I didn’t see it!”
Charlie: “I mean, they really didn’t want you to.”
Emily: “And how many people are dead because of that?”
Charlie: “It’s not your fault… And it’s not all bad.” (weak chuckle) “Vaggie likes it better down here. The one upside to finding out old secrets is how it can make things better- she makes much more sense now too.”
Emily: “In good ways?”
Charlie: “In… in kinda silly, kinda sad ways.”  
Emily: “Silly is good.”
Charlie: “Yeah…”
Emily: “Sorry. I won’t pry. I’m just listening- passively- if you want.”
Charlie: "It’s nothing super personal or secret, just that, I get why she likes high places and open spaces when she needs thinking time. Not like the view’s amazingly great down here, so I always wondered… All those times finding her on roof tops or the hotel’s crow’s nest."
Charlie: "I asked if staring at heaven's light was a moth demon thing once and she just shrugged, but the angel thing makes so much more sense and she's terrible at lying if I'd just ASKED-”
Emily: "Now you're sounding like me."
Charlie: "URGH right- good things, good things are- when she's up there, I know now she's either cursing heaven or hating herself."
Emily: "... is there a better good thing? Because that's..."
Charlie: "Now I can HELP her. With that."
Emily: "That's a good thing, yes."
Charlie: "She doesn't have to walk around all the time being scared of me finding out and getting angry or hurt, I DID find out and I WAS angry and and hurt, and it was fine."
Emily: "Well..."
Charlie: "Okay fine, not fine but BETTR. It IS better."
Emily: "..."
Emily: “...your hotel has a crow’s nest? That must be perfect for her.”
Charlie: “What? Oh, yes. She loves it...”
Charlie: "Shit even her HAIR makes so much sense now."
Emily: “She’s grown hers out- I’ve never thought about an Exorcist with long hair- it’s very pretty.”
Charlie: “Pretty, fun to play with, but she leaves it loose even when all the swooshing annoys her. It gets in the way of her trying to stab people."
Emily: "I bet we could find a metaphor in that."
Charlie: "I guess it’s kinda like wings though? The weight and having something cover her back like that.”
Emily: “Wings are… not just that. Wings are pretty different.”
Charlie: “Long hair was probably still better than nothing though. I wonder if she’ll cut it now? Or just keep it in the ponytail?”
Emily: “What do you mean?”
Charlie: "Well, short hair is easier to take care of, right? Plus she seemed to really like having it out of her face during the battle, even after getting her wings back-”
Emily: “No, wait- Getting them back? She’s an angel, doesn’t she have- hasn’t she always had….”
Charlie: “No she… They didn’t mention that either, did they.”
Emily: “What did they do.”
Charlie: “One guess. And one guess who ‘they’ were.”
Emily: “Lute. Adam leaves- he left almost everything that actually needed doing to her.”
Charlie: “Well this time the thing that needed doing-”
Emily: “They took her wings.”
Charlie: "It was more of a ripping action? Tearing?? Wrenching- No, ripping sounds right- Ripped them off and left them on the ground next to her. Vaggie had to stuff them in a dumpster before any sinners saw them and mobbed her.”
Emily: “….”
Charlie: “M-maybe I shouldn’t have said that part.”
Emily: “It’s fine. Important to know.”
Charlie: “But Vaggie only just told ME about it, and now I’m blubbering it out to you- fuck. Forget I said it? Please?”
Emily: “You should talk about it with someone who isn’t her, Charlie.”
Charlie: “Not like this though! Not with-”
Emily: “An angel. Someone from heaven.”
Charlie: “-not with someone she isn’t even friends with yet.”
Emily: “Thanks for the ‘yet’ part. I hope you’re right about it.”
Charlie: “I will be. But um. Until then…?”
Emily: “All I know is she didn’t have wings and now she does again. No specifics.”
Charlie: “Thank you.”
Charlie: (clears throat) “You, uh. You were telling me about YOUR Exorcist.”
Emily: “Right. Her and children. The ones who wandered off-”
Charlie: “-onto the one place in heaven that isn’t sunshine and rainbows and fluffy clouds of happiness, right right.”
Emily: “It was a bit of shoreline Exorcists use for live battle training.”
Charlie: “Yay fun?”
Emily: “Where they, they practice tearing each other apart with their bare hands-”
Charlie: “Oh!”
Emily: “-weapons aren’t used for it, don’t worry! None of the children were in any real danger!”
Charlie: “But they SAW it!?”
Emily: “From a distance… not, not close enough to get splattered by blood….”
Charlie: “Oh wow that’s SO reassuring!”
Emily: “Except for one of them.”
Charlie: “How the HECK didn’t anyone notice there were kids around before starting that stuff!? Didn’t they CHECK-”
Emily: “The Exorcists are very used to being left alone.”
Charlie: “STILL!”
Emily: “I know. I was so angry at first- I didn’t show it, the other children were already hiding under my wings after I’d gathered them up. They didn’t need me getting mad too.”
Charlie: “Didn’t wanna to scare them?”
Emily: “Watching the Exorcists was scary enough.”
Charlie: “I’m trying SO real hard to imagine a happy ending for this.”
Emily: “It’s there, don’t worry. See, one of the children had wandered further than the rest, and was just standing there, frozen. Staring up at.. all that.”
Charlie: “That doesn’t sound happy.”
Emily: “It was so frustrating! I couldn’t get to them without bringing the others even closer too! Some of them could barely move they were so frightened- I tried calling up at the Exorcists, asking them to stop, but they either didn’t hear me or ignored me-”
Charlie: “FUCK that’s just-”
Emily: “But then-”
Charlie: “….”
Emily: “One of them left formation.”
Charlie: (smiling) “Yeah?”
Emily: “She came swooping down, all soaked in blood- not hers, I don’t think. She didn’t look hurt. She landed right in front of the child."
Charlie: “Oh covered in BLOOD that must’ve been, er, something.”
Emily: “It wasn’t great. Poor thing was so scared under her shadow I thought they’d cry.”
Charlie: “Wouldn’t blame them.”
Emily: “Me neither. Those masks… but’s it’s funny, you know, how much a small thing can change everything else.”
Charlie: “She wasn’t as scary as her mask, was she?”
Emily: “No. She was, awkward. I saw her do a little wave and kneel down- later they said she’d talked with them, asked if they were hurt and where their home was.”
Charlie: “Normal stuff.”
Emily: “Strange for an Exorcist. Then she- she offered to take them home. She was still all spattered with-”
Charlie: “Blood. Ew.”
Emily: “I didn’t know what was going on when it happened, I just saw the Exorcist stand up and march right into the sea, right into the waves! She come out clean enough but also. Well. Also sopping wet and a bit um, a bit less scary looking."
Charlie: "Heheh."
Emily: "A lot less scary looking. A little pitiful looking?”
Charlie: “Like Husk after the champagne bottle incident!”
Emily: “Like who?”
Charlie: “Oh our bartender. Long story- but I’ve seen sad and bedraggled wings before. I’d LOVE to see them on an Exorcist!”
Emily: “It was pretty funny. And she didn’t seem to mind the child laughing at her either. If anything I think she made more of a show of shaking herself dry and fluffing up afterwards, once she heard them giggling over it.”
Charlie: “Aww~! She didn’t wanna scare them either!”
Emily: “She was silly. I’d never seen an Exorcist being silly before. The other ones watching didn’t seem to like it. They’d finally stopped fighting and looked like they were muttering to each other… Lute, Adam, even Sera, they're really strict about not having Heaven's army mixing with the rest of Heaven...”
Charlie: “But she- the silly exorcist- she didn’t care.”
Emily: “If she did, it didn’t stop her.”
Charlie: “Did she take the kid home herself then? Once she wasn’t covered in. Uhh. Blood.”
Emily: “She did. The other children were so jealous!”
Charlie: “Jealous??”
Emily: “After she helped wipe off the, the blood spatters on them, she scooped them up and just rocketed into the sky.”
Charlie: “Ohmygosh that's so FUN! Angel piggyback rides are the best!”
Emily: “It looked like it. Exorcists train and practice, and their wings are strong- I knew that but I still don’t think I’ve ever seen someone move like that in the air. Like she was dancing.”
Charlie: “Vaggie says fighting and dancing have a lot in common.”
Emily: “She does?”
Charlie: “Mm-hmm. And if SHE’S any example, then I bet plenty of the Exorcists would be GREAT dancers too! If they bothered not killing people long enough to find out, that is.”
Emily: “If. Right."
Charlie: “…”
Charlie: “….Vaggie stopped. She was, she used to- and it took time but, she stopped.”
Emily: “And Lute cut out her eye for it.”
Charlie: “I don’t think she regrets losing it. Or- it was worth it to her? She.. sometimes it’s almost like she feels like she deserved it.” 
Emily: “I hope not. It shouldn’t have happened, it didn’t help anyone.”
Charlie: “No. It really didn’t.”
Emily: “They probably used her as an example of why no one else should do that.”
Charlie: “…well… maybe your Exorcist will still think it’s worth it?”
Emily: “Maybe. If she’s not dead.”
Charlie: “R-right.” 
Emily: “And she’s really not mine. I don’t even know her.”
Charlie: “You know enough to care.”
Emily: “To care about someone who might not even deserve it? How does that help anyone-”
Charlie: “EVERYONE deserves to be cared about.”
Emily: “Even-”
Charlie: “Everyone. At least to the point of caring if they’re dead or not.”
Emily: “… you’d make a great angel, Charlie.”
Charlie: “HA! I’m not sure that’s a compliment anymore but uh. Thanks?”
Emily: “I meant it more that, if Sera and Lute and Adam had been more like you, then none of this would have happened. Or if you’d been up here, you would’ve stopped them.”
Charlie: “Ehhh… I kinda think if you couldn’t manage it, I wouldn’t have either..? Definitely NOT alone and not without-”
Emily: “You started the hotel! You had to go against so many people to do that-”
Charlie: “-okay yes but we only JUST got that going. And I only could do THAT because I had…”
Charlie: “…”
Charlie: “It’s easier, with someone who believes in you.”
Emily: “Like a partner?”
Charlie: “Yeah.”
Emily: “A girlfriend.”
Charlie: “….yeah.”
Emily: “And it’s late. I’ll let you get back to her.”
Charlie: “It’s probably okay. She was tired and, she’s a pretty heavy sleeper once she actually falls asleep. You can usually tell when she really conks out because the snoring-”
Charlie: “-oh fuck oh no no no not again DON’T TELL HER I SAID THAT EITHER!”
Emily: “I won’t.” (giggling) “Although I might’ve heard it earlier.”
Charlie: “Fuck. Shit! FUCK!”
Emily: “But I swear on all six of my wings I won’t breathe a word. I also don’t know what happened to you guys- other than a huge traumatic revelation followed by an actual battle for your lives-”
Charlie: “That was a thing, yes.”
Emily: “-but I really hope you two are okay.”
Charlie: “Oh we will be! Weirdly enough, we’re better off now than we were before, even!”
Emily: “Lots of new things you can finally talk about?”
Charlie: “SO many.”
Emily: “Heh. Good. I’m glad something turned out okay from all this.”
Charlie: “And I really hope at least ONE more thing can turn out okay. For you, specifically.”
Emily: “We’ll… we’ll see I guess.”
Charlie: “First thing in the morning. I promise.”
Emily: (breath in) “Okay….” (breathe out) “Thank you.”
Charlie: “Any time. Or, no problem. Or- not that I WANT you to need help identifying bodies again anytime soon, I just meant…”
Emily: (laughs) “I know, Charlie. It’s okay. And it’s also really late. Good night.”
Charlie: “Good n- oh hey wait, Emily!!”
Emily: “-yes?”
Charlie: “What AM I looking for exactly? With the wings.”
Emily: “Oh- You know how Exorcist always those two stripes on theirs? The black bands on their feathers, the undersides.”
Charlie: “Yyyyep, yep. Now that you mention it…”
Emily: “She only had one.”
Charlie: "......"
Charlie: “…one… wing stripe?”
Emily: “It’s how I noticed her at first.”
Charlie: “That’s, that’s rare among Exorcists, huh?”
Emily: “She was the only one with wings like that, I think. Every few years I’d catch sight of her following behind Lute and Adam with a few others, trailing them through the actually populated places in Heaven for once, in full Exorcist gear.”
Charlie: “Well if she, if they were masked, maybe it wasn’t always the same person-”
Emily: “It was. She was easy enough to spot even without the wings, once I knew what to look for.”
Charlie: “Which was…?”
Emily: “She was the only one who’d wave back at the children who waved at her.”
Charlie: “…”
Charlie: “…oh.”
Emily: “Sorry. This is, a pretty depressing thing to go back to sleep after, isn’t it? Try to have some good dreams okay?”
Charlie: “I- I will. I’ll try. Um, you too?”
Emily: “I’ll give my best shot, if I can sleep. Thank you again, Charlie. Night.”
Charlie: “Good night..”
-call ends-
Charlie: “……..”
Muffled voice: “….charlie?”
Charlie: “SHIT!” (bangs head on door) (slips back into bedroom) “I’m here, I’m right here- no no no don’t sit up-!”
Vaggie: “What’s wrong?”
Charlie: “Nothing! Just a phone call. Please lay back down?”
Vaggie: “Something happened. Everyone okay?”
Charlie: “Everyone’s fine- Emily calling for a small favor that’s all- Vaggie c’mon, we just got it so your ribs weren’t getting pressed on…”
Vaggie: “Emily.” (alarmed) “Did Lute try something? Did Sera-?”
Charlie: “NO. Nothing happened to anyone! Now, SIT!”
Vaggie: (sits)
Vaggie: “Something’s wrong.”
Charlie: “Well my girlfriend happens to be one half broken bones and other half tenderized meat and won’t stay still, so THAT’S not exactly great!”
Vaggie: “…..”
Charlie: “…….”
Charlie: (sits too) “…Emily wants help checking the dead Exorcists. She might’ve known one of them.”
Vaggie: “Shit.”
Charlie: “Yeah..”
Vaggie: “But, knew one? How would she know any of us?”
Charlie: “Well…”
Vaggie: “She’s a seraph. The only Exorcist who goes near the higher ups is Lute.”  
Charlie: “Right but, just because you never met her doesn’t mean…”
Charlie: (sighs)
Charlie: “It was a LONG talk. Tell you tomorrow?”
Vaggie: "I guess... If you promise to be my pillow and lay down for a while instead of just pacing some more, then yeah, I can wait.”
Charlie: “Okay not fair- I was taking a call!”
Vaggie: “Your hoofbeats were tip tapping through my dreams long before then, babe.”
Charlie: “Motherfucker.”
Vaggie: (chuckling) “Sleep, sweetie.” (drags them down)
Charlie: “Hey don’t act like that wasn’t MY line a moment ago!”
Vaggie: “A moment ago all I knew was something was wrong and you were sad. Now I know just the usual shit is wrong, and you’re dead tired.”
Charlie: “Guess you’re not wrong there…”
Charlie: “….Vaggie?”
Vaggie: “Hmm?”
Charlie: "Do you.. like Emily?"
Vaggie: "Like her? The one not asshole angel up in heaven? She got all fired up with you about the shit unfairness of hell and stuff. What's not to like."
Charlie: "That's not the same as you actually liking her though."
Vaggie: "Hun, we've barely met. It's not like I went on the heaven tour with her."
Charlie: "Buuut.. maybe you'd like to get to know her?"
Vaggie: "Do you want me to get to know her."
Charlie: ".... I just wish there was some part of heaven that... wasn't bad for you."
Vaggie: "Hey, it was heaven. Murder soldier cult thing aside, if we're just talking personal comfort or whatever, it wasn't the worst thing in creation."
Charlie: "Wow what a stunning review! Other than the psychological trauma, it was great!"
Vaggie: "It wasn't that bad. Just you know. Comparatively."
Charlie: "Comparatively?"
Vaggie: "To this. Being here like this, with you."
Charlie: "Hmph."
Charlie: "...."
Vaggie: "..."
Charlie: "... you asleep?"
Vaggie: "Almost. But it feels like you have another question before you're ready for sleep."
Charlie: "You don't have to answer this one."
Vaggie: "Me not answering is kinda what fucked us over before."
Charlie: "It's different now. We can wait until you're ready."
Vaggie: "I'm ready. Ask."
Charlie: "....okay."
Charlie: "Um..."
Charlie: “Was. The sinners you killed-”
Vaggie: “Murdered.”
Charlie: “Murdered, okay. Okay. Were they. Were any of them… kids?”
Vaggie: “….”
Vaggie: “Once.”
Vaggie: “Almost.”
Charlie: “…almost… so, that was the time you stopped.”
Vaggie: “Yes.”
Charlie: “Okay. Because it was a kid?”
Vaggie: “I don’t know.”
Charlie: “What d-”
Vaggie: “I don’t know what I mean. It doesn’t. I don’t think it matters. Charlie- not killing one time isn’t the same as… never having killed.”
Charlie: “I know- I mean, I get that-”
Vaggie: “It doesn’t fix anything, or make anything better.”
Charlie: “It doesn't have to! We’re working on that part together. With the hotel.”
Vaggie: “It's not your thing to have to make up for.”
Charlie: “My home, my people, my friends and my girlfriend. Mine mine mine. And you feel better now you’ve stopped, don’t you?”
Vaggie: “Feeling like a less crappy person also isn’t the same as feeling better.”
Charlie: “It’s not?”
Vaggie: “Thinking you’re a good person, a hero even, is a pretty great feeling. Finding out you’re murderer sucks.”
Charlie: “You ARE a good-!”
Vaggie: “Charlie. Please?”
Charlie: “….”
Charlie: “What about when I hug you?”
Vaggie: “… hard not to feel lucky as hell, then.”
Charlie: “Good” (hugs) "Me too."
Vaggie: “Kinda hard to hug back while I’m lying half on top of you… Would a wing snuggle be alright?”
Charlie: “It won’t hurt your ribs??”
Vaggie: “No. I could use a stretch, honestly.”
Charlie: “Then gimme the floofies!”
Vaggie: “Yeah?”
Charlie: “GIMME GIMME~”
Vaggie: "Floofies at your service." (wings go floof) (snuggles one over charlie) “I’m glad they came back.. different.”
Charlie: “With the gray?”
Vaggie: “Mm. Thoughts?”
Charlie: “GRAY-t! They go WAY better with your hair now!”
Vaggie: (chuckling) “Nice. Girlfriend approved."
Charlie: "And it's lucky we ARE girlfriends, or else your pretty wings would have girls FLOCKING to you!"
Vaggie: "Right." (SNORTS) "Night, Charlie.”
Charlie: “If you’re wishing me goodnight to try stoping the wing puns, please know there’s more where that came from! I am in no way winging it here.”
Vaggie: “I figured.”
Charlie: "I really do love your wings, Vaggie."
Vaggie: "Really helps they don't look like they used to."
Charlie: "Hmm. Is the anything other than the color different?"
Vaggie: "... Isn't that enough?"
Charlie: "I don't mean it like that! It's just, well, they only have one stripe on them, and the other exorcists-"
Vaggie: "They were like that before. Sorry."
Charlie: "Vaggie I don't NEED them to look different. I'm just, curious!"
Vaggie: "Uh-huh."
Charlie: "Really! Did any of the other exorcists have-?"
Vaggie: "No."
Charlie: "None of them? Ever?"
Vaggie: "Not since I took up vanguard duty. Or since. Looks like Lute got rid of the position after I- after getting rid of me. Now they just all stream down into hell all at once. No one scouts ahead." (mutters) "Messy."
Charlie: "Huh."
Vaggie: "So I guess my wings didn't change that much really."
Charlie: "If they'd stayed exactly the same I would have loved them."
Vaggie: "Not sure I'd want you to."
Charlie: "Too bad. They're part of you. They're part of the most amazing woman I've ever met.... If you like them better now though, that's good. Maybe you. Maybe you'll feel like having them out more?"
Vaggie: "We'll see."
Charlie: "BUT I want eternal dibs on the wing hugs."
Vaggie: "What? You staking a claim?"
Charlie: "Yes absolutely. My wing hugs, okay?" (hugs tighter) "Mine."
Vaggie: "Okay." (chuckling) (relaxing) "They're all yours, babe." (snuggling in) “Love you...”
Charlie: “Love you too, Vaggie.”
Charlie: (smooches gf's forehead) “Goodnight…”
Vaggie: (already asleep)
Charlie: “…..”
Charlie: (traces the one stripe on Vaggie’s wing)
Charlie: "...you probably could have been happy up there... if they'd let you."
Charlie: (wipes face)
Charlie: “… fuck heaven.”  
Vaggie: (SNORES)
Charlie: (grins) (still teary-eyed) “Exactly.”
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Hi I like your writing and saw your how housewardens react to you not sleeping at night to do things for other people
I was wondering if you can make one for leona, riddle (and ruggie if you want)
sleepless nights II
part 1 | join the taglist | masterlist | request rules | ko-fi
how characters react to you not sleeping at night to do things for other people
characters: riddle rosehearts, leona kingscholar, ruggie bucchi
𝑹𝒊𝒅𝒅𝒍𝒆 𝑹𝒐𝒔𝒆𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒔
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When he first catches you out late at night, he's confused by your hurried pace. He attempts to catch up to you to find out what you're doing, but he loses you too quickly.
The moment lingers in his mind for the rest of the night but is slowly forgotten over time as he deals with troublemakers who can't follow simple rules. He's reminded of it again when he finds you out late a couple of days later. This time, however, he can clearly see the strain and tiredness in your eyes.
Determined not to let you get away this time, he catches up to you before you disappear again. You're startled by his sudden appearance, and he apologizes before steadying your swaying form.
"Are you okay?" Riddle attempts to get you to look at him, but you're in a daze, drifting in and out of reality. He has to bring you back to his room in order to get you to talk or acknowledge him at all.
Concern is written all over Riddle's face as he tries to get you to snap out of whatever mind space you're in. You blink rapidly, shaking your head slightly as if you have to physically shake all the cloudiness out of your mind.
"Riddle… what-" You look around the room, not recognizing it from the previous location you remember being. "When did I get here?" You finally focus on Riddle, who's kneeling in front of you, a glass of water in his hand as he looks up at you sitting on his bed.
He's eventually able to get the answers he wants out of you, feeling anger and annoyance build up inside him when you tell him what's been happening. He knows how you are; how you'll try to help everyone you come across, even if it means hurting yourself in the process. Knowing this, he's annoyed at anyone who would try to take advantage of your kindness for their own gain, and he won't let them keep doing it.
When he watches you fall asleep on his bed, he takes it as his chance to find the person you're "helping." It's safe to say that you don't hear from them again after that moment, and Riddle constantly reminds you that he's here for you. Every time you want to help someone, make sure you're taking care of yourself in the process.
𝑳𝒆𝒐𝒏𝒂 𝑲𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔𝒄𝒉𝒐𝒍��𝒓
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When Leona first heard you go out at night, he ignored it. It wasn't his business anyway. However, as the nights went on and he heard you leave the room every single night, he grew irritated.
One night, when he heard you about to leave the room, he grumpily asked where you were going. You jumped at his voice, not expecting him to be awake when he was usually sound asleep at this time.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you," you whispered, even though there was really no point since the grumpy lion in front of you was already awake.
"Where do you keep going every night?" Leona asked again, his voice groggy and eyes closed as if he might fall asleep again at any second.
"I just need to help someone with something." Leona forced his eyes open at this statement, glancing at the clock on the bedside table.
"It's 1 a.m. Do it in the morning." You wanted to tell him that technically it was morning, but you knew sassing him right now probably wasn't the best idea.
"I'll be right back," you told him, but you weren't right back. You didn't come back the entire night, which resulted in a very annoyed Leona when he kept reaching for you in his sleep and you weren't there.
He heard you finally walk back into the room well into the morning. He thought you were going to get in bed finally, but instead, he heard you shuffling around the room. He opened an eye to see you moving around as if getting ready for something.
"What are you doing?" You looked back at Leona, who was still sprawled out on the bed, stopping yourself in the middle of grabbing the folder on the desk at his question.
"I have to get ready for the day, which you should be doing too." You turned on the small lamp on the desk, causing Leona to grunt and throw his arm over his eyes at the dull light illuminating the room.
"You didn't sleep at all." Leona's voice was slightly muffled from his position, but he could still be heard clearly.
"It's fine, I'm not that tired." You were clearly lying, and he could tell. He could hear the tiredness in your voice and had seen the bags under your eyes in the brief moment he looked at you.
Before he could say anything else to try to convince you to stay, you were already out the door for the day. Usually, you would try harder to get Leona to get up for the day, but you knew the longer you stayed in the room, the more likely it was that he would be the one to convince you to stay instead.
Leona finally heard you come back for the day and let out a relieved sigh when he felt you get in bed next to him. It was already dark by the time you came back, so he figured now he could relax fully for the night. Oh, was he wrong.
Not even ten minutes after you lay in bed, there was a knock on the door. You moved to get it, but Leona grabbed you so you couldn't move. "Just ignore it," he grumbled with his face pressed into your neck.
However, the knocking didn't stop, and you soon found yourself having to squeeze out of Leona's grip. You could tell the last of his patience was breaking, but you wanted to answer the door in case it was the person you'd been helping recently.
It did turn out to be the person who needed your help once again. You were about to step out with them in order to talk when the door you were holding partly open, just enough to see the person outside, swung all the way open.
Leona was standing behind you, gripping the door harshly as he let out a snarl at the other person. You saw them start backing away from the door before Leona slammed it shut, flipping the lock and dragging you back to bed.
He was finally satisfied with you by his side as he slept and got the best sleep he'd had in the last few days. He didn't wake you up in the morning either, not that you would really want to be with as much sleep as you'd lost recently, and you two ended up sleeping the whole next day away.
𝑹𝒖𝒈𝒈𝒊𝒆 𝑩𝒖𝒄𝒄𝒉𝒊
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Ruggie notices something is off when you appear more and more tired than usual. You're usually one to get fully rested at night to prepare for the next day. He starts to pay closer attention to you as a couple more days pass, thinking maybe you just had a rough night, but you still don't seem to be getting much sleep. You're meeting this person almost every night.
He's confused about how you know them, not having seen them around until recently. When he sees you exchange things with them, he assumes that they commissioned you for work, but that thought goes out the window when he doesn't see them pay you anything after you say your goodbyes and leave.
Curiosity gets the best of him at this point, and he can't help going up to you to ask. You don't look any better up close. It's clear that you haven't been sleeping recently, barely registering that Ruggie's in front of you until he says something.
He comes right out and asks if you're working with that person. He's taken aback when you say you're just doing them a few favors that they've been asking for, and you couldn't find it in yourself to say no because of how desperate they sounded.
"You're doing all this work for free…?" Ruggie has to sound out the sentence for it to come out as he intends, even though it doesn't make any sense to him.
"Yes," you let out a breathy laugh, not knowing where he was going with this. They needed help and you offered. There's not much else to it. Of course, you haven't been getting much sleep at all this last week because of it, but you're happy you're able to help them out a bit.
Ruggie's completely stunned at the revelation, not knowing why anyone would even bother doing something so strenuous for someone without even a hint of payment. "You're losing sleep because you're doing someone else's work, do I have that right?" All he needs is your slight nod to know exactly what he needs to do.
He doesn't give you a chance to say anything else before he's grabbing the few things you have in your hands and dragging you back to your room. You attempt to stop him, trying to tell him that you need the things he took, but he's not hearing any of it.
Before you know it, he's out of the room faster than he got you to it, and you're left there without the materials you need to finish the request. You fall asleep as soon as your head hits the pillow, well overdue for some rest.
You don't see Ruggie until the middle of the next day, and you can tell that you aren't getting the materials you need back anytime soon, if at all. He's just happy that you finally seem to have gotten some rest, not regretting it in the slightest when he passes the work onto someone else and blackmails has them do the rest of the work for you.
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blueberrymocha · 2 days
Text
texting them
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gon
✰ he didn’t grow up with much technology
✰ and he def did not have a phone
✰ so since he isn’t in the habit of using it often, your messages are all on delivered
✰ he also prefers to live in the moment instead of checking his phone all the time
✰ unfortunately for you that means you’re better off calling the person he’s with if you need to reach him
✰ once you talk to him about it though, he’ll be sure to answer within a couple hours
✰ he’d save your contact as a pet name, personally i can see him using “sunshine” or “honey” for you
✰ you’d be pictureless until killua points it out to gon and explains that you can add pictures to someone’s contact
✰ but once he does learn he’ll use a cute coupley picture of you guys from one of your first dates
✰ would have trouble deciphering your abbreviations
“btw ur gna be back asap right?”
“huh.”
✰ its fine, he prefers to call (loves to hear your voice) anyways
killua
✰ y’all would be so mischievous together
✰ prank calls as a weekly ritual
✰ you’re mostly safe from them but don’t think he’ll never do it to you
✰ probably won’t text you first but always responds within the minute
✰ would only call if he’s checking up on you, like when you’re sick or he’s on an adventure
✰ will use the most abysmal, disrespectful picture he has of you
✰ your name on his phone is either an inside joke or an insult like “sleeping ugly 🧚‍♀️” (he’s out for blood omg you overslept once)
✰ i just know alluka is confused af
✰ he’ll change it to something else whenever you see it, which you will eventually
“y/n can you check my phone?”
“sure! babe why is my name ‘dumbass’ heart emoji, wizard emoji?”
kurapika
✰ you can see this one from a mile away…
✰ his phone always got that silent mode + dnd + texts muted combo
✰ he does all that but would fully expect you to pick up if he called you
✰ speaking of which, he would call probably daily if either of you were away
✰ never forgets an “i love you” “be safe” “see you soon” etc
✰ if something happened, would want you to know that
✰ you guys would fall asleep on calls
✰ but mostly him
✰ your contact might just be your name for a while
✰ but i could also see him using something tame like “love” or “sweetheart”
✰ hes also the type to leave you on read
✰ especially if you’re asking when he’ll be back or how his mission is going
✰ generally just keeps his work separate from home unless he needs to vent or it’s extremely relevant to you
leorio
✰ wishes he could talk more often
✰ school just keeps him really busy
✰ will be upfront with you if he needs time to study, make dinner, or anything of that nature
✰ you’d get in the habit of leaving voicemails
✰ he listens to them all and leaves some for you too
✰ also good morning and good night texts, always
✰ your picture is whatever picture of you he finds the hottest tbh
✰ your name would be a pet name such as “shorty” or “beautiful”
✰ idk why but i feel like he’d misplace his phone often
✰ so if he doesn’t respond by the end of the day, you’ll probably get a call from his roommate’s phone saying how he lost his own
hisoka
✰ lets it ring out and then calls back a minute later
✰ “oh did you need something?”
✰ this man can’t stop playing games, the call cuts off halfway through what you’re saying
✰ then he calls back again acting like it was the wi-fi
✰ don’t worry——that’s only like a quarter of the time
✰ depending on his mood, he’ll be mostly serious
✰ imagine the look on his face when he realizes you’re calling because you’re in the hospital or smth
✰ yeah so he’s better at responding now!
✰ your contact picture is gonna be from the most stalker angle
✰ like it’s just you sleeping
✰ you found that a little odd but maybe your clown just wants to capture those memories
✰ …while you’re walking home on the opposite sidewalk
✰ if you’re in a longer, serious relationship, your name is something romantic like “my dove” but it’ll take a while to get there
illumi
✰ you’d be so surprised to find that he loves to call
✰ he travels a lot as an assassin, so he needs something to do
✰ would always text you formally it’s scary
“have you arrived at the manor yet, y/n? be sure to notify me immediately once you do.”
✰ he’s giving you customer service type responses
✰ you’ll also get updates about his missions
“i’ve just finished killing the target, expect to see me home in four days”
✰ the contact is just your name and if you convince him, he’ll add a picture of your choice
chrollo
✰ has like six phones
✰ if you didn’t know he was the leader of a gang you might‘ve thought he was cheating
✰ you also have the numbers of most of the spiders
✰ so if he ever has to disappear (like after yorknew) they’ll be sure to let you know what’s going on
✰ he’ll text you a few times a day if he’s able to
✰ would ask about your day and remind you to take care of yourself
✰ the conversations usually focus on you, while he listens or prompts you
✰ like kurapika, doesn’t want to involve you in troupe business so it’s very rare for him to even mention them
✰ he doubts you even want to hear about how he robbed an old man today, or killed a woman who didn’t hand over a jewel
✰ on his top secret personal phone, he’ll give you a contact photo with both of you in it
✰ your name would be a classy pet name, maybe “princess” or “beloved”
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lighthouseshepard · 20 hours
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writing idea - john gets considerably injured and doesn't tell arthur cause he thinks arthur would judge him cause "arthurs had so much worse happen and he just got back up" and arthurs like "dude you've had a human body for like two weeks i would expect you to not be used to pain" and its like a stereotypical hiding injury thing you know
HI HI thanks for this!! again i tried to keep it under 1k but. it ended up... 4.3k.....
heres a mostly unedited first draft i might play around with more later!! (: not so much a considerable injury but this is where my brain went anyways!
As John takes the stairs up to their small apartment building, Arthur in tow with one arm wrapped loosely around his just behind him, he stumbles.
It’s a quick, clean slip of his left ankle, rolling outward at an unnatural angle just as he reaches the last step. The movement itself would have been almost unnoticeable if not for the sharp stab of pain which accompanied it, a searing pressure radiating outwards in undulating bursts. He hisses under his breath, hurriedly letting Arthur go so as not to accidentally drag him down too, and tries to casually play off the lurch.
“Sorry,” he says quickly, righting himself. Immediately he bangs it against the cement edge, eliciting another silent wince he’s immensely grateful Arthur isn’t privy to. “Lost my footing, I guess.”
Arthur hums, instinctively reaching out for John’s guidance and huffing when none was received. Cautiously he takes the remaining steps, coming to stand just beside John at the top before the door.
“It’s alright, John,” he replies, head tilted in his direction. “Thanks for not pulling me down with you.”
His smile begins to fade after a moment of silence in which John stares dizzily at his own feet, struggling to control his breathing. “You okay?”
“I’m fine,” comes the hasty retort. “I just… hit it on the stone, I think.”
His brow furrows. “Hit what?”
“My ankle,” John growls, blinking away spots of light dancing across his vision. In the dying sunlight they blended in amongst the cloudless sky, shimmering specks deceptively working to trip him up again as they wavered in front of him. As soon as the words leave his lips he regrets them. 
“I mean,” he clarifies, “I barely knocked it. Nothing to worry over.”
“Oh.” Arthur frowns, searching for John’s hand in the middle distance between them. “Do you want me to take a - well, not a look, but perhaps we could patch it up? Is it bleeding?”
“No.” John pushes slightly past him, fidgeting for keys in his pocket. Arthur’s arm is left hanging at his side, fingers lightly clenched. “I said it’s fine, Arthur. Can we drop it?”
“Okay,” Arthur mutters exasperatedly under his breath, following him hesitantly inside once the door is unlocked. “Whatever you say.”
John all but limps his way into the front hall. If the shuffle makes a noticeable sound against the faded rug he attempts to ignore it, desperately gritting his teeth. With each shift of his leg the throbbing increased, sending burning jolts of agony up through his foot. Beads of cool sweat were breaking out on his temples. Irritably he wipes them away, squinting into the living room through the haze of pain clouding the forefront of his mind.
“Stupid fucking ankle,” he mumbles.
 “What was that?” Arthur calls from behind him. John struggles to turn, one flattened palm braced against the wall. He watches as Arthur unwinds the scarf from around his neck, smoothly kicking off his shoes into the corner. Shoes that he, too, needed to probably remove if bending down didn’t seem like a far impossibility.
But he doesn’t answer. Instead he slowly twists back around, hobbling towards the promise of relief found in the couch awaiting him.
“John? Did you hear me?”
His eyes shut tightly as soon as he sinks into the cushions. The pain refuses to dull despite the lack of pressure once he sits, if anything only growing stronger when he attempts to prop it up on the coffee table, as though gravity were relentlessly trying to tug it down again for his own good. He groans, the noise pulled unbidden from his throat, and hastily covers it up with an aimless cough he feels as a weak imitation of one in his chest.
“John,” he hears a second time. Arthur’s voice is closer now, somewhere directly to his left. Although he turns his head in acknowledgement, his eyelids remain closed, brow furrowed. 
“What? I heard you.”
He could practically sense the crossed arms. 
“What’s going on?” Arthur asks, his tone firm. “Why are you sitting like someone threw you there and you don’t know how to get up?”
“How do you know that?"
"Lucky guess."
"Nothing’s going on. I’m… comfortable.”
“Really? You don’t sound like it.”
“I said it’s nothing,” John snaps. The wince which pulls his lips taut lessens any blow he’d intended within his retort. “I’m just tired, that’s all.”
“I thought you hit your ankle on the steps?” Arthur says thinly, stepping closer. “So which is it?”
It never ceased to irritate and amaze, Arthur’s ability to weasel the truth out of him. Back when he’d just been a voice behind those deep amber eyes it was magnificently easier to conceal the truth, hiding himself in falsehoods he had ample time to conjure up while Arthur slept or moved about the world amongst others, unable to talk to him. He hadn’t been bound to a body which would betray him at the slightest inconvenience: all his emotions, he felt, were visible on his face and in the lines of his silhouette all the time. Being given away by the twitch of his mouth or the hesitancy in one look of his eyes was maddening. He couldn’t control it, hadn’t yet mastered the subtle art of physical deception. He had no reason to, he knew, but it continued to bother him regardless, being so visibly and openly seen by everyone around him. Every thought was laid bare, ripe for someone else to pluck.
These visual cues didn’t apply to Arthur, of course, but it didn’t need to. It didn’t matter when it came to him. He could sense each ripple of truths withheld in John’s voice as though they were tangible vibrations running beneath his fingers, plucking incorrect notes from a string of music. Whether this was a skill gained through time or familiarity, he didn’t want to ask. Perhaps he’d just had plenty of practice, before John came along.
“It’s… both,” he says lamely, eyes flicking open to watch as Arthur shifts from one foot to the other impatiently. “Stop looking at me like that.”
“Like what?” he exclaims, a frustrated scoff behind his words. “I’m not even looking at you. I can’t.”
“Like you know exactly what I’m thinking,” John presses, willing himself not to wither beneath that sightless gaze. Like a parent, he thinks to himself, who’s just caught someone doing something they shouldn’t.
“Maybe I do.” Arthur comes to stand beside him, bumping up against the edge of the couch. “Maybe I’m just trying to help, you donkey. What is going on with you?”
“It’s-” he begins to say, but he’s quickly cut off.
“Don’t tell me it’s nothing. You’ve been like this all day: grumpy, antagonistic, walking… very oddly. Did you not sleep very well?”
“I slept fine,” John mutters. “How could you possibly know I was walking strangely?”
“Ah, so he admits something!” Arthur says with a scoff. “I can feel it along your arm when I’m holding onto you. The movement of your gait is different from anyone else - Noel, Oscar, even Marie. Your footsteps all sound unique, too. If I didn’t know any better I’d say you were trying not to limp.”
The silence stretches. John breathes in shallowly, as if the quieter he became, the more likely he was to become invisible.
“John?” Arthur asks uncertainly. “Have you been limping all day?”
“I… not all day, Arthur.”
He sighs, a ragged exhale. “Jesus fucking Christ, John, I knew it!” he says, throwing his arms up. “Why didn’t you say anything?”
John tries to prop himself farther up on the couch cushions, sliding the dead weight of his leg along the coffee table. “Because it’s not important, Arthur,” he protests angrily. “It’s just a - a sprained ankle or something! Noel says it happens to people all the time.”
“You told Noel?” Arthur’s demeanor shifts, and John can’t quite place where it was going. “Is that who you hung up on over the telephone yesterday, when I walked in?”
“I - yes, I told Noel,” John says, glancing away. “I didn’t want to… I mean, I wouldn’t-”
“But you didn’t tell me,” Arthur states, frowning. “I don’t understand, John.”
“Because I didn’t want to bother you with it, alright? Jesus fuck, Arthur! It’s just a little bit of pain!”
His shout rebounds around the living room, echoing along corners and twisting through the dark. Once it dissipates, all that nervous, fearful energy fading into thin air, John realizes the sun had already set. In the shadow of the singular lamp they’d kept on after they left earlier that day, Arthur looked smaller than John had ever seen him previously - socked feet, soft button down shirt untucked, shoulders slumped while his head was turned away from John’s direction.
Hurt, he understood after a solid minute of nothing spoken. There was hurt on his face.
“Arthur,” he says hastily, backtracking. “I didn’t…”
But Arthur was already interrupting.
“Is it bleeding?” he asks flatly. “From where you knocked it as we were coming in.”
John’s eyes widen. “What? No, no, like I said it’s probably just a sprain.”
“Don’t get up.”
“I wasn’t. Where are you going?”
He watches helplessly as Arthur begins to trod across the living room to the hallway just behind them. His left hand searches for the wall, brushing against it occasionally as he vanishes around the corner, the thin lines of his silhouette blending into the darkness. John waits with gritted teeth, listening to the faint but unmistakable sound of a drawer opening in the bathroom, before he’s rejoined in the living room.
“Give me your foot,” Arthur instructs. He comes around on the opposite side, taking a careful seat on the table in front of the couch. “Which one is it?”
“It’s… it’s this one,” John stutters, glancing at the little white box he’d placed between them. “What is that?”
“First aid kit. Came with the apartment, I think. Never thought I’d have to use it.”
There’s a bite to his tone which causes something in John to cower. Panicking at the unfamiliarity of the uneasy feeling, he thinks immediately to fight back against it. Yet no manipulation tactic in his mental catalog nor no insult he’d ever learned from Arthur was readily able to be wielded. He stares, unsettlingly dispirited, at Arthur’s hands while he begins to search through random items in the kit.
“Arthur.”
“Put your leg on my knees, John,” he says. He’s facing away, still wholly focused on determining which items were what through sensation alone. The subtle surprise when John does as asked without further complaint doesn’t go unnoticed.
“Oh. Thank you. Now tell me where it hurts.”
Stretching over as much as he was able, halfway balanced on the edge of the cushions and held now partially up by Arthur’s own legs, John indicates with one pointed finger. 
“Here,” he says, lightly touching the far side of his ankle. “Move your hand just - just there.”
As slender fingers come into contact with the swollen skin, John hisses. Arthur moves as if to draw back, but after some hesitation makes a second attempt with a touch so gentle John hardly senses the wandering examination at all.
“It’s swollen, John,” Arthur says, staring into the middle distance as he feels along the reddened skin. “You’re going to have to take your shoes off.”
“I know it’s swollen,” he grinds out, “I can feel it.”
Immediately he regrets the display of aggravation. Eyes flick worriedly to Arthur’s face, searching for any kind of reaction there, but he may as well have been surveying a blank canvas.
“I think we should try ice,” is all he says. “Before attempting any kind of compression. Wait here.”
“It’s not like I could go anywhere,” he mumbles beneath his breath as Arthur leaves him for the second time. “I’m not running a fucking race on this thing.”
When he returns, grasping a cloth wrapped bundle, John studies him curiously. Nervous muscles stiffen in preparation for another round of sharp throbbing; but as Arthur sits again opposite him, the grip which guides his foot is somehow even kinder than before, cradling the injury into position across his knees.
“Let me take your shoe off,” he murmurs. “I’ll be quick.”
"I’d rather you didn’t,” John protests. “Can’t we just - God, Arthur!”
No apology is forthcoming. It’s palpable in the tension of Arthur’s fingers regardless, the unhappy twist of his mouth. He fumbles the laces undone with one hand and slips the shoe off, dropping it unceremoniously to the floor. One black sock follows. The hem of his trousers is rolled back up to his calf, delicately smoothed along by a soothing touch.
The introduction of cold is almost worse than the prodding he’d just undergone. John jolts as the cloth touches his skin. A pang similar to shattered glass ricochets across his foot and he has to bite his tongue to keep from shouting. Arthur holds him steady, other hand firm on his calf, bent over the injury.
“Easy,” he says quietly. “It’ll hurt for a minute or two, but this will help to numb some of the pain and swelling.”
“Numb?” John gasps, “or worsen? What even is that?”
Arthur readjusts the bundle. “Peas wrapped in a washcloth. You should know, you bought all the groceries last.”
“Why the hell would I buy peas? They’re repulsive.”
“Well I didn’t, and we don’t have ice in right now, so it’ll have to do.”
True to his word, after some uncomfortable minutes of silence, the throbbing begins to lessen. John sinks back in relief, a sweet dullness overtaking pain receptors which had not let up on their constant alarm for what seemed like eons now. Thoughts broken up by the unrelenting ache finally begin to clear. From behind the haze he sighs, tilting his chin up towards the ceiling. Long hair spills over the back of the cushions.
“That’s… much better,” he says weakly. “Thank you.”
“I imagine it is, yes… John?”
“Yes?” he answers, anticipation sitting nauseatingly in his gut. “What?”
“Why didn’t you tell me you hurt your ankle?”
In the low light he steals a glance over. His vision was better than most - better than Arthur’s, when he had been able to see out of his eyes. Things came across with astonishing clarity, even when there was little illumination to help refine the world around him. John narrows in on the long pink scar across Arthur’s throat, an indelicate reminder of the Dreamlands, the incomprehensible weight of that last stand reduced to one single, jagged divide. His torn ear hid neatly enough behind reddish gold curls, but the mark across his face where those dangerous sands had scraped away the skin there was not so easy to miss. 
In the break between their conversation he rolled up his shirtsleeves and there too John could spot scars, dots and lines of invisible constellations, healed but not forgotten. The wooden pinky finger taps his ankle as he shifts the peas. John’s pinky, he thought. Or, it had been.
Everything about Arthur was a testament to some horror he’d survived, that they had survived together. And John, in this new body, had nothing to show for it.
“John?” Arthur asks. “Are you okay?”
“No, I’m not okay,” he argues. “It hurts.”
“Is this helping at all? We can always wrap it afterward. Hopefully it won’t need to be seen by anyone.”
There’s concern in his voice, so genuine despite the way he’d just been treated that something snaps just around John’s lungs, a sharp, bitter pull. Whatever he had been about to say dies under his tongue. Nothing comes out, although his lips part for several seconds.
“John?”
His restraint falters.
“I’m sorry, Arthur.” 
“...What?”
“I’m sorry,” he says, yanking the words agonizingly out. “It wasn’t my intention to lie to you from the start, I - I didn’t know how to tell you.”
“Tell me what, John?” comes the baffled prompt. “That you injured yourself?”
“Yes,” he emphasizes. “I don’t even remember how I did it, I guess I just… stepped incorrectly? Tripped over something? I don’t fucking know, Arthur, and it’s so goddamned stupid. I can’t even control my own two legs! How am I going to keep existing in this body if I break under the slightest influence? It’s not like you get hung up over a fucking sprain, or don’t bounce back from a coma, or a car crash, or-”
“Hang on, John, wait,” Arthur interrupts. “Is that what this is about? Me?”
“Yes! No. I don’t know, Arthur. A bit of both?”
Frustration boils beneath his skin, hot and shimmering. The corners of his eyes prickle but he doesn’t move up to rub at the sting coiled there, waiting for release.
“You don’t let anything stop you,” he says, the living room blurring. “Gunshot wounds to the chest, electrocution, multiple stabbings, so many falls I’ve lost count-”
“Technically the gunshot would have killed me if not for the wraith, " Arthur offers feebly, but John doesn’t seem to hear him.
“Not even getting gutted through inside those mines in Addison! Not even my shitty job of sewing you back up.” He swallows, breathing heavily. “You’re practically fucking invincible, and meanwhile I take one wrong step and I’m incapacitated for days, can’t even take a stroll with you down the street, can’t carry you up to bed when you’ve fallen asleep on the sofa.”
Tears were flowing now, trickling in trails of shame down flushed cheeks. “It’s ridiculous. I witnessed you wade through literal nightmares, Arthur, and you did it without losing yourself. You still managed to laugh where you could, to have hope, and-”
The thought was running swiftly away from him. He twists sideways as far as he could, facing the other side of the room, held in place only by his ankle. Again wishing to disappear, again wanting to crawl back inside Arthur’s head where it was safe.
It takes Arthur far too long to respond. For some time nothing moves in their midst, save for the rapid rise and fall of John’s chest, the hitched cadence of his breathing. Eventually Arthur shifts. John listens to his clothes rustle and wonders when the floor would swallow him whole.
“John?” Arthur says softly. 
His jaw clenches. “What.”
“Look at me.”
Sniffing, he turns. The hand not keeping the frozen vegetables on his foot coaxes his chin up and over. Arthur’s touch doesn’t linger, giving him ample space. John wishes it would. Frustration continues to slip across his face, lines of damp salt.
“I didn’t react that way to all of those things because I wanted to, John,” he says gently. “I did so because I had to. I was surviving, trying to keep us both alive. What would have happened if I gave in and just laid down and let it all overtake me?”
John mulls it over. 
“Nothing,” he concludes, wiping angrily at one eye. “We wouldn’t have gotten very far.”
“Exactly. You think I didn’t struggle? You saw me, John, you saw through me!”
He laughs, the first bright sound to filter through the room since they’d come home, tinged by bittersweet memory. “You were there for every second of it. Remember me waking up from the coma? I could hardly drag myself out of the bed, much less walk. And everything else that’s happened to my body, well…”
Briefly he touches his stomach. “Sometimes I wonder how there’s any blood left in me. I feel patchy, like I’m just made up of gaps a person could see straight through. It all still aches, John. I’m aware of it all, every stupid mistake or scar or… whatever else Addison and the Dreamlands, all those monsters did to me; but if I refused to accept in some capacity, where would that get me? Fuck, I’d never leave the bed, and I’d have every right to do so. Why do you think I still sleep in some mornings?”
“You’re saying you’re hiding things too, then,” John says slowly. A flutter of remorse crosses Arthur’s smile, curving it downward. 
“Yes,” he nods. “A little bit. I didn’t want you to worry, John.”
“This is the same thing, then!” John exclaims. “I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want you to worry!”
“It’s not the same, but… it is similar, sure. I’m still figuring this all out, what to do now afterwards. I know we both are. I suppose we’re each guilty of something here, aren’t we?”
A mutter answers him, unintelligible. Arthur sighs, rubbing John’s leg placatingly. 
“I have experience with this kind of thing, John. You, frankly, do not. We don’t know how this body is going to react to the smallest of injuries, so when you’ve hurt yourself, or tripped, whatever, you need to tell me. I can’t help you if you’re so determined to be… stoically adamant that you can handle it.”
He winces. “No, poor choice of words. You’re more than capable of handling anything. The point here is that you don’t need to do it alone. I didn’t do it all by myself, either, even if it was our body at the time. I still had you there with me.”
“Okay,” John mumbles. The tears had stopped, drying in faintly gleaming tracks. Unable to help himself, he reaches over and directs Arthur’s free hand to his face. Arthur catches on quickly enough. One gentle thumb brushes the dampness away beneath both eyes.
“You said I didn’t lose myself in the midst of all that,” Arthur adds contemplatively, “but I did. You brought me back over and over. I won’t let you drown here, either. I guess we need to be more honest with each other in general.”
He flashes a small smile. “Works in progress, hmm?”
“Sure,” John says, wavering under that look. It was impossible not to. “Okay, Arthur. Thank you. I guess I…”
“Hmm?”
“I know it wasn’t easy, but you made it seem so effortless. I guess I wanted to be able to react the same way.”
“Nothing about being human is effortless, John. If it were easy, you’d be something else altogether.”
Neither are sure what else to say, so they choose to say nothing at all. Arthur removes the cloth, saturated with condensation. The swelling had gone down somewhat. Beneath the inflamed skin a dull ache persisted, but it was milder, simpler to deal with. Darkness shot through with distant city lights and a sliver of the rising moon sits just behind the glass window panes of the front room, enticing and comforting with its allure of endless promise. In the lamp’s glow, John watches Arthur start to slide off the table, cradling his foot until he’s able to place it down atop its surface.
“I think you should sit here for a while,” he advises, frowning. “I can help you down the hall later. If you want, that is. It’s doubtful you’ll be able to keep much weight on this over the next few days if you want it to heal properly.”
“Great,” John mutters. “Wait, where are you going?”
“To change out of these clothes? Why?”
“Can’t you,” he stutters, “stay here? I can’t reach the washcloth. What if I need it again?”
“I can place it next to you,” Arthur says wryly, catching on. “It’s only a foot away.”
“What if I have to get up?”
“You shouldn’t be moving at all.”
“Arthur, please.”
“Christ, alright,” he agrees, fondly. “Just for a while. I’m exhausted too, you know.”
He slips next to him. They fit together seamlessly after some adjusting, John avoiding old wounds, Arthur working around this new one. It’s a recently acquired habit, this circling of one another, quietly curling up until they were consoled enough in their own selves and each other. John’s head ends up across Arthur’s thighs, his foot propped up on the armrest of the other end. He was so tall his leg stretched past the edge of the sofa, halfway dangling in mid air.
“John, darling?” Arthur asks absently, untangling dark curls spread out across his lap.
“Yes?”
“You’ve… carried me up to bed before?”
John blinks. “Of course. I couldn’t leave you on the sofa like that, shivering.”
“I wasn’t shivering,” he retorts with mock affront. “Was I?”
“It was kind of pitiful. To give you credit, you had kicked off the blanket I put over you earlier.”
“I was wondering where that had come from,” Arthur mumbles. “Thanks, John.”
“You’re welcome. You sleep like you’re the prize boxer in a dream ring.”
“What does that even mean?”
“You kick,” John says meaningfully, eyes already beginning to close. “Hard.”
“Oh. Sorry. At least I don’t hog the blankets all the time,” Arthur retorts sheepishly.
“I do not hog anything. I’m much taller than you now! I need more of it.”
“Not all of it.”
“Buy a second blanket, then, if you’re so concerned.”
They bicker until John falls asleep. Sentences drop to single word responses, and soon enough he’s out, trying to get one last quip through the heavy pull of slumber. Arthur sighs as he feels his breathing even out, one palm flat on his chest. He hadn’t even gotten a chance to change clothes. 
“John?” he whispers. “John?”
He doesn’t answer. Arthur lets loose another weary exhale. There was no way he could move now.
“I think you did this on purpose,” he says softly, yawning. “You just want me to play with your hair, don’t you? Unfortunately for you, I’m probably going to fall asleep right here beneath you.”
He brushes stray strands off John’s forehead. It continued to puzzle him how someone who had once spent thousands of years inflicting agony on others now flinched beneath the prospect of bothering those closest to him with pain of his own.
Arthur drifts into unconsciousness soon after the thought dissipates like smoke, head dipping to rest sideways on one shoulder. John, clinging to the last dredges of wakefulness, peers up through heavy lidded eyes just in time to catch a glimpse of Arthur’s silent goodnight, John, on his lips. 
56 notes · View notes
seahydra · 3 days
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Part 2 featuring My Real Self?! Okay now this is where I get cringe. Sorry. I'm so sorry.
So, like... I never really know how to begin talking about her because whenever I even start thinking feel like I immediately dissolve into 💕💘💕❤💓💕💘💓💘💛❤💙💘💕💞💓💞💙💞💓💘💘💓💙❤❤💙❤💜💞💕💛💛💓💘💓💘💓💕💘💓💘💙💌💙💘💕💌💛💌💛 mode right away so putting things into words is hard. That and I'm not much of a words guy overall, so. (<- this statement is gonna look really funny if this post ends up being long)
Anyway, four years ago today I started playing this game. I started playing specifically for Leviathan actually because one of my friends on Discord back then recommended the game to me and kept showing me him because they were convinced he'd be my fave.
If you're still out there somewhere you have no idea how right you were I'm literally tormented every day.
Also, fun fact... when you start up the (OG) game, one of the characters appears on your screen at random, right? When I opened the game for the very first time, guess who mine was. Yeah. Lmfao
Anyway their description of him interested me and even though I'm not one for dating sims usually I picked it up - honestly expecting to drop it after maybe a week or so - and then was met with what was probably the most unwell character introduction I'd ever seen I mean like come on
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These 4 screenshots aren't even all of it by the way. She had SO MUCH to say in that one first meeting I was immediately enthralled. For a couple of different reasons, I guess. Number one is obviously "good god I love that kind of passion" number two is that I felt like I GOT her right off the bat. As someone who also kinda doesn't know when to shut up when he starts talking about something she likes. Not often I see a 'nerd' kind of character that actually feels like... so similarly to myself I suppose.........?
What I mean to say more like is that he resonated with me right away because he felt the most 'real' to me, or like, someone I could see myself befriending and bonding with In Real Life. The in-game texts and stuff almost felt like I was texting with someone I've known for a while (apart from being forced into bland answer choices I'LL GET YOU) even though that feels embarrassing to admit and I was even kinda mad about it back then because why are this dating sim's evil tactics actually working on me.
Didn't stop me from continuing to play it though. I dunno. I started really really falling in love with him too. Aside from the initial failgirl cringe that lured me in she's genuinely very sweet sometimes....... in her own way and I'm fond of that.... She gets flustered easily and maybe isn't outright flirty or romantic and charming the way some of the other characters in this game are but I like her just fine the way she is.
Actually I wouldn't want her to be perfect and smooth all the time I want my loser wife who stutters for 15 minutes before presenting me with a very heartfelt gift and then explains every last bit about both the process of choosing it and the details of the gift itself. I love her.
I'm kind of losing my ability to structure this properly already aren't I AUGHHHH... POINT BEING. I FELL IN LOVE WITH HER AT FIRST SIGHT AND IT'S ONLY CONTINUED TO GET WORSE. I love her not in spite of her cringe but BECAUSE of it. She's everything to me. She's gotten me through a lot actually. Even though I've had periods of time where I think about this game less I always come back to him anyway... at this point to me she IS my real partner www I only need my wife and nothing else <333333
Happy anniversary sweetheart... words honestly cannot describe how much I love love love you so much but at least I tried, right?
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wizzard890 · 1 year
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what got you so into the french revolution?
When I was in school for medieval art history, I did a lot of work on saints and their martyrdoms, particularly how the viewers of art depicting suffering imagined suffering, and how the agony/eroticism of those feelings induced a sort of memetic spiritual euphoria. Which means that I spent a ton of time looking at images of executions. I've seen them all: beheadings and sexymen shot full of arrows, saints barbecued or flayed or eaten by wild animals, criminals broken on the wheel -- all the classics. Or at least, I thought I had, until I encountered this triptych in my senior year of college:
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This, by Belgian artist Antoine Wiertz, is The Visions of a Guillotined Head, painted in the late 1840s. Wiertz was a symbolist, and spent a great portion of his career drawn to the macabre, never more notably than on the occasion that inspired this painting.
In February 1848, two notable French criminals were due to be executed by the state. The guillotine was of course still in use as a method of capital punishment (and would be until the 1970s), and Wiertz was curious as to what a so-swiftly severed head felt and saw. He wasn't the first; since the guillotine's invention there had been legends of heads that blinked and blushed and tried to speak after separation. Luckily, Wiertz had a friend who was a hypnotist (as you do). Timed to the moment of the execution, he had his hypnotist pal put his soul "into rapport" with the dead criminal, and claimed that he entered the head itself as it fell.
He later recalled his experiences at some length in writing, but since we're talking about me, here is the important passage, dictated as he "felt" the horror of execution:
A horrible buzzing noise, the sound of the blade descending. The victim believes that he has been struck by lightning, not the axe. Astonishingly, the head lies under the scaffold and yet still believes it is above, still believes itself to be part of the body, and still waits for the blow that will cut it off. Horrible choking! No way to breathe. The asphyxia is appalling. It comes from an inhuman, supernatural hand, weighing down like a mountain on the head and neck. A cloud of fire passes before his eyes. Everything is red and glitters.
Now comes the moment when the executed man thinks he is stretching his cramped, trembling hands towards the dying head. It is the same instinct that drives us to press a hand against a gaping wound. And it occurs with the dreadful intention of setting the head back on the trunk, to preserve a little blood, a little life.
This fucked me up so bad.
I am well aware that consciousness after having your spinal cord severed is a done deal. I was aware of this in college. But there was something about this artist's act of imaginative empathy that compelled me, for the first time, to think about the guillotine in particular. About the mechanical wait, not being pushed off a drop or axed while kneeling, about being slid through on a board, of seeing the basket beneath you, already full of heads. Maybe even heads you know.
I imagined it so hard that I made myself sick and couldn't go to class for two days.
The reason I studied what I studied wasn't because I was ghoulish. In fact, I'm a little squeamish. It was because in the experience of pain, we are all deeply individualized, but entirely, helplessly human.
I laid in bed and thought about the small number of humans who I, an educated layman, knew had been guillotined: Marie Antoinette, obviously; Louis XVI; and (in what felt like black historical irony, given what I knew of his day job) Maximilian Robespierre.
It felt intrusive to have intimately imagined their last, most private moments, without really having any idea about them at all. Better to start at the end and work backwards, I thought. So I started reading.
Robespierre, decapitated by guillotine when he was thirty-six. That's the manner of death. How did he meet his death? In terrible pain, I learned. Why? Because he'd had half his jaw blown off the night before. Jesus, why? Because he'd (maybe probably) shot himself. Why?
It turns out, if you keep doing that, a piece at a time, for years, you can learn a lot about someone's life. And, relatedly, in long and branching paths, you can find your way into every nook and cranny of what burned through France at the end of the 18th century.
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aardvaark · 2 months
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i was thinking about how i wished leverage had a birthday episode for some of the characters cause that would be sweet, but then i realised something and basically…. okay here’s my thoughts in quotes form, just for fun
hardison: so when’s your birthday? i could plan something for us and the team to do and-
parker: i dont know
hardison: you don’t know… your own birthday?
parker: no, how would i know? pshh, cmon, you’re telling me you remember EXACTLY when you were born? watch this - hey, eliot, do you know your exact birth date?
eliot, innocently passing by, who was canonically anonymously dropped off at a hospital as an infant: no, how would i know?
parker: that’s what i said!
hardison: excuse me?? what is going on right now
sophie, walking into the apartment: whats wrong?
hardison: parker and eliot- well, okay, when’s your birthday? i just have to prove something.
sophie: …….july 12th
hardison: why did you pause? wait, is that your birthday or sophie devereaux’s birthday?
sophie: ………… (guilty silence)
parker: see, no one knows their real birthday! haha you’re so weird sometimes, hardison
hardison:
hardison: what the fuck guys
#leverageposting#wren speaks#leverage#parker leverage#alec hardison#nate knows his birthday i guess so i didn’t include him. if he was watching the whole time he would probably say ‘idk’ to mess w hardison#they’re having this convo in nate’s apartment but it’s like 3am & he’s asleep & they’ve all broken in to hang out#parker doesn’t know either bc of her ridiculously neglectful foster parents or bc she’s parker & her priorities are simply different to most#people. her birthday is irrelevant to thievery. and sadly probably not related to fun happy memories anyway.#sophie obviously is a good enough grifter to answer confidently but she feels a little bad abt lying to her family by now#meanwhile hardison had a normal foster nana who would have known his bday. most kids aren’t safe-surrendered like eliot so assumably#hardison would have a known bday. and he likes birthdays!#and he wants to throw parker a little party even if it’s a very unconventional parker bday that involves rappelling & jumping off buildings#but he is once again thwarted by the leverage team members having the strangest possible lives#he IS gonna give them each birthday parties tho. even if he has to make up some dates & stuff#sophie’s can be the fake date she gives if that’s what she rlly wants. nate’s real birthday is on file somewhere even if he’s being annoying#rn so hardison just has to do some basic hacking. eliot would have an approximate bday such as the day he was surrendered that his parents#would have celebrated throughout childhood. and parker’s would be april 1st bc that’s alice whites bday (and YOURE ALICE!!!)#as in it’s canonically in the online info abt alice white shown in the juror no.6 job & obvs that’s april fools so it’s funny :)#and hardison has a NORMAL bday unlike SOME ppl and yes he DOES expect presents you heathens!!
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monty-glasses-roxy · 3 months
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Freaking HAUNTED by the scenario of Cassie falling for the Mimic's act in the elevator and she comes back from it so, so, SO freaking scared but also so so SO freaking biased and spiteful and ANGRY she tries getting back at Gregory in the way that would hurt him even more than just 'paying in the same coin', by taking away from him exactly what he loves the most by trying to get Freddy destroyed. 💀 (definitely not a route I think Cassie would truly dive into but boy ain't it an interesting one none the less! 👀)
It also doubles as a way to free Roxy and the others from Freddy as well!! Two birds one stone!!
However... I've never heard the saying 'paying in the same coin' so I'm not entirely sure what it means, but I can take a pretty good guess. Not to be contrarian but what makes you think destroying Freddy wouldn't be doing the same thing Gregory did? He destroyed Roxy, Chica and Monty, and it was his voice telling him to deactivate Roxy for good to come and save him. After shutting her down, and her coming back to throw herself at Mimic for Cassie, Gregory tried to make it all for nothing by dropping her.
All of Roxy's damage falls on his shoulders, both before and after Cassie came into the picture. He didn't even care, did he? And neither did Freddy so really, this is the best vengeance she can hope for. She deals with the animatronic that Roxy keeps saying she'll kill if she ever sees him again, and hits Gregory where it really fucking hurts. Two revenge plans one stone!
And you're so right, Cassie would probably not go down that road... But ya know she might at least be a little tempted given Roxy's aggression over it. She keeps giving her ideas damn it she doesn't want them!!! Roxy can take them and do whatever she wants with them, Cassie doesn't wanna do it!!! And it works out cause Roxy doesn't have the fucking balls to go all the way with a murder plan anyway so no one gets hurt!!!
I guess that's a lose lose scenario ngl though...
This reminds me of a scenario I had the idea for a little bit ago when we were last talking about this stuff! (That got a bit long here so I'll add a read more for convenience)
The idea is that Vanessa, Gregory and Freddy return as quick as they can to try and save Cassie and instead find Roxy, once again guarding the door, Mini swarm in the shadows around them. She's obviously more damaged than before so it's a bit more difficult, but she's doing her best not to fall off the barriers she's stood on over the door and I've just had the idea of Minis holding onto her in the dark like training wheels. Aside from them, she's completely alone.
Vanessa talking is a shock to her and she's beyond happy to hear she's okay and most importantly, was freed. Surprisingly touched by her running to help her too... Just fucking snaps at Gregory and Freddy to shut the fuck up whenever they say anything cause she doesn't give a flying shit what they have to say. Vanessa hurries though, asking how she got away from that thing down there and tells her that Gregory's friend Cassie was down there too, what happened??
Yeah uh. Roxy says nothing for a while and Gregory gets impatient and tries to run at the door. The Minis grab him and the swarm just kinda take him away, literally up the fucking wall and take some pictures with an old Fazcam so Roxy can see it later lmao she's actually devastated she can't see this happening right now. Anyway, Roxy's like "what do you THINK happened?" and since she won't say anything else, they naturally, assume the fucking worst. She doesn't correct them or say another word. Just tells Freddy and Gregory that they've done enough fucking damage and to get out before she throws them out...
Oh yeah Gregory is fucking pissed. Why didn't she save her?! Why is Roxy out here when Cassie isn't?! What kind of useless animatronic is she that she couldn't save one kid?! What, is she only good at killing kids?! Is that it?! He's so fucking mad and Roxy just lets him rant and rave, the Minis stopping him for her every time he makes a run at the door until Freddy takes him away. He says he's disappointed in her, but that he's not surprised and that makes her seethe but she doesn't say anything until she hears Vanessa leaving. She stops her and when they're alone, she tells Vanessa the truth.
Cassie is in bad shape. Mimic is dead and they barely made it out, but her dad took her to hospital a little before they got here. Vanessa - who was in tears already - is so fucking relieved, but then asks why Roxy didn't say anything earlier. She tells her the truth as she knows it. That Cassie was here trying to save him. That Mimic lured her here as him, and at the end, Gregory said he couldn't risk being followed, and dropped the fucking lift with Cassie in it.
Now that doesn't make sense to Vanessa. She may not have been there for that last bit but they didn't rush all the way over here for nothing. Roxy can't exactly answer why he'd want to come back here, but she reminds her what he and Freddy did to all of them and points out that this would hardly have been out of the ordinary for him.
And so, you now have a situation where Vanessa doesn't know what to believe. She knows Roxy wouldn't lie about something like that and even if she did, she's a fucking awful liar. But she's clearly angry enough to let him think Cassie is dead and not give a shit... And she says it's to make sure he doesn't try it again so she's also asking Vanessa not to say a word. She can't do that! She can't just let a kid think his friend is dead because of him! ... But she's right in thinking this may not be completely out of the ordinary for him... But he wouldn't do that to someone he would run to the rescue of, right?? Gregory wouldn't do that, she knows him well enough to know that now!!
You see what's happened here? Now Vanessa is in the middle. If she doesn't say a word, Gregory will forever think Cassie got killed trying to save him. If she tells him and it turns out Roxy is right, then what if he tries again?
I feel she'd tell him, but no matter what, Roxy just straight up telling the truth to Vanessa, his current guardian, and not to him would cause so much pain. He could have been there screaming at her and she didn't say a fucking word because in her mind, this is nothing compared to what he's put all of them and Cassie through. And what happens if she does die in hospital?? What then?? She can't lie and say she's fine when she's not anyway!! She doesn't know shit!!
But ya get me with this? It's emotional revenge enacted at the end of Roxy's very long day in the pizzeria graveyard. Minimal effort required, with Vanessa unfortunately in the middle, but Vanessa is always welcome here. Roxy won't blame her for whatever she chooses to do, because at the end of the day, Roxy's done her job. Whether Gregory or Freddy believes it or not, she did her job.
She's really fucking glad she couldn't see his reaction though, she wouldn't have been able to keep her mouth shut if she had. Like most of the others, she can't bare to see a kid in genuine pain and she knows damn well how much her silence caused...
But yeah, you just got me thinking about that again. It's a spur of the moment thing for Roxy, inspired partly by the fact she's not good with words and doesn't really know how to approach this anyway. It's been a long day and her lack of words just turned into this and she's not even a little bit sorry. I think Cassie would appreciate the sentiment of keeping her safe from a second attempt on her life. And feel a bit bad that she takes some satisfaction in hearing how devastated Gregory was over it...
The picture of him being held from his ankles on the ceiling by the Minis is pretty good revenge too. They're proud of that one lmao
#pop rox answers#pop rox writes#because i just wrote out a wholeass scenario here it's close enough djjdjd#anyway poppet... is probably a little upset by this turn of events... for multiple reasons...#a lot of the minis are but they're loyal to roxy and they know enough to know that this has probably hurt her pretty bad too#she's not exactly famous for dealing with pain and grief in healthy and nondestructive ways#they may not agree with her actions but tehy know her well enough to know that this was probably the tamest option#given her history and the fact she hasn't had more than five minutes to process anything yet#and these three just showed up adding MORE to the stress of the day so yeah they don't really blame her#doggo is buried in spiders after this#oh and i forgot to mention!!!#once roxy and vanessa are alone vanessa gets her guts squeezed out through her nose in a hug#in all of my stuff like this the animatronics dont know what happened to vanessa#she's presumed missing#the minis have fucking searched for her body that's how little they all know#roxy plagued by the thought that gregory did the same to her as he did them and freddy let it happen...#expecting to find her stumbling around broken and bruised or just straight up dead...#not very fun!! i like to think they were sort of onesided friends so yeah not fun#anyway yeah uhh. hope you don't mind me adding a great big long scenario to your ask#revenge plans just had me thinking about that and had me thinking that could be a revenge thing too#and not just roxy being exhausted and trying to keep cassie safe from future attempts#telling vanessa is also an attempt to keep her safe too. she needs to know what happened so she can make her own decisions here#what she does is up to her but if she ever needs anywhere to hideout or anyone to keep her safe well#the plex is always open to her... even more so if she gets her fucking eyes back from freddy fuckface as well#listen. there's a good reason he's not surprised by the idea she didn't save cassie.#she knows why too and it pisses her off to no end the damage he's done over this#she would understand too if she didn't hate his fucking guts and thought about it for two seconds#anyway that's enough of that. gonna reread real quick and post okay bye#long post
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hey, thanks for reminding me to add an ID onto my emperor's new groove post! i should've thought about it from the start but honestly i expected that post to get basically no attention. was wondering if i could ask you about something though--in the past whenever i've put IDs on a post of mine i always put it on the image's alt text, which i did go ahead and do just now! but does that work just as well or is there a reason why adding the ID into the body of the post would be preferred?
Hi omg, I'm so sorry it's taken me so long to get to this!!! Alt text is, from what I've seen, preferable for screenreader users, but not everyone who needs IDs uses a screenreader, and there are some display issues with alt text on Tumblr that can make it less accessible, which are some reasons for a plain text ID to be used instead!
The consensus I've most recently seen is that using both alt and plain text covers the most bases, but competing access needs mean that using both methods or only one is always going to be an imperfect solution. Personally, I put shortened/concise descriptions in alt and full descriptions in plain text when it applies, and I always copy alt text out into reblogs. You can choose the standard for your own blog, though!
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Can u draw something about the comic sooner or later you're gonna be mine?
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Mac is my favorite character! You didn’t specify what you wanted, so I drew Mac. ;)
OH SHIT YOU MEANT THE COMIC NOT THE FIC— I’m such an OLDHEAD
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skeletalheartattack · 26 days
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i saw a Zarbon statue at GameStop today and thought of your blog
*spits out whatever i'm drinking* i think i hauve to go to gamestop
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tarraxahum · 5 months
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Really want to strangle a co-worker right about now, and not in a good way
#this bitch is supposed to be the one giving tasks to ME#and we have a deadline TOMORROW MORNING#and I'm like 'hey let's maybe work on it'?#but he says 'nah focus on the current work we have until morning on this one'#like. okay. sure. I am the one that has to write ELEVEN TEXTS after you specify the tasks and provide all the info tho.#do you expect me to do that first thing in the fucking morning with my ass on fire like an hour before deadline?!#I think okay fine maybe he'll come back to it after we finish the current work#NOPE#the motherfucker just. vanishes.#I understand he's probably also working multiple jobs like I do BUT LIKE. I DO MY JOB ON TIME.#so anyway I blow a fuse#'cause I DON'T want to do this shit in a hurry tomorrow and I DON'T want to go down with him#so at fucking 11 am I sit down and I think of all the concepts myself and I dig all the additional info myself#and I write all that shit solely by myself#and yeet it at him - he's also my editor so I'm supposed to run it by him either way#so the only thing he has to do in the morning is edit it and add his Very Important Rewrites#cool right#what does he answer?#'thanks Alex. good night'#BITCH?! THAT'S ALL YOU HAVE TO SAY AFTER I DID THE WHOLE TASK FOR YOU?!#I am FUMING#if there's any trouble tomorrow and I hear ONE word @ myself I'm just gonna tell it like it is.#snitching might be bad but I did not sign up to carry your ass#11 pm. PM. can't fix the bloody typo on mobile#important to note here that. like. there's a REASON I'm not in his place. I was offered#but I already worked a position once where I was doing all this plus like thre more different job tasks#I am not going back into that hell.#however APPARENTLY that puts me in a position of working with fucking amateurs#like I chose not to do this job but it doesn't mean that I don't know how to do it. AND IT INFURIATES ME THAT YOU DON'T
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honeydots · 9 months
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Assuming based on previous ask you're not going for an mpreg interp with Soleil and Siegbert, who do you imagine being the egg donor/surrogate for the babies?
OH im gonna use this ask as an excuse to ramble about some tangentially related stuff, ive got this headcanon that there's some (slightly experimental?) reproductive magic at play :O not that i don't think there would be a surrogate involved, but i like the thought of there being an already existing science for this. as far as the actual surrogate goes, i prefer not using any in-game/named character! i think it gets too complicated, especially with parenting. usually i imagine this isn't an entirely unusual process, and so a """royal surrogate""" of sorts is a role that's filled when necessary. but again, i don't like using canon characters for that role.
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miabrown007 · 6 months
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mal in the grishaverse is to alina what jacob in twilight has been to bella. in this essay i'll...
#okay so in twilight jacob is like bella it's unnatural that edward is alive he should have been dead long ago. and if he was and he didn't#meddle with natura and the timeline i would be the one for you in our timeline. but he's here because he's extra special and that makes me#obsolete. because like alina and mal matched until they were both common and not special but now alina is a summoner and#she's the specialest of special girls and mal is throwing a tempter tantrum over that right#and they are like. they should be best friends and nothing more.#anyway that was point A#I'm over not one not two but three glasses of wine but even like this I know that one point justification belongs in my friends DMs not#an essay so let me present point B#so he's like the firebird right (he just circled her hand where the last amplifier would go and they felt weird#incredible foreshadowing btw) so like he belongs to her but only part of her belongs to him and that's very jacob vibes with all the#renesmee business. and also mal is just. so desperate to define himself by what he is to alina like he expects the answer to his own#identity crisis that is the consequence of his own actions (deserting literally no one asked that of him) from her#like the only way he thinks about defining himself is in relation to her . and like yeah ig they are teenagers and 'in love' or whatever#(they have zero chemistry while the darkling and nikolai are constantly standing next to alina and it works but ig I digress)#so i'm just constantly being told and they are in love and want a simple life (and that's the very thing that made me side with Gale instead#of Peeta back when so I'm probably primed to not want that for characters) but idk I just don't see it that they'd make such a good pair#anyway I guess this is a Mal hate post and I'm dragging the moder YA lit's each and every love interest into this 'analysis'#blueberry wine is excellent by the way would recommend#miaing
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