#autism accesibility

[littleroseprince]

🌺Nezha communication cards pt1

Pt2

Pt3

[only-knives]

i love you disposable and reusable straws. i love you sippy cups. i love you cups and containers with handles. i love you tiny utensils and toothbrushes. i love you ergonomic art supplies. i love you lap desks. i love you wireless electronics. i love you cushioned surfaces. i love you automatic and press to open doors. i love you wide seats and high weight limits. i love you adjustable clothes, furniture, mobility aids, etc etc. i love you accessibility and comfort.

[lolathelooptyloop]

being neurodivergent and having neurodivergent friends is so fun because wdym i can come over to your house, yap about our shared special interest for 2 hours and then lapse into silence and just enjoy each other's company for another 3 hours until we both telepathically agree we're done and i say i wanna go and you let me out and wish me a good night without doing the whole "oh, no, stay" thing. i could never do this shit with a neurotypical person

[anim-ttrpgs]

Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy, and Themes of Disability, Mental Illness, and Criminality.

Back Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy on kickstarter before May 10th if you want to help a disabled person with limited ability to work pay his bills.

Verisimilitude, What Would a Person Do?

To understand Eureka’s themes regarding disability, mental illness, and criminality, you first have to understand its verisimilitude.

“Verisimilitude” is defined as “the appearance of being true or real,” and it is a big part of the core design ethos behind Eureka. It is a very realistic game.

We aren’t necessarily of the opinion that “realism” is a better design choice than stylization overall for RPGs, but it is a better design choice for Eureka, because we want the PCs to be very normal, believable people who make believable, organic decisions in extraordinary situations. No matter what anyone says, the mechanics of a TTRPG strongly influence what kind of stories are told with it, and what characters do in those stories. So if we want characters to make realistic decisions, the world they inhabit and interact with must be constructed of realistic rules.

Even though there is a small chance that they may be a supernatural creature, PCs in Eureka are still not fearless action heroes, chosen ones, or anything of the sort. They’re normal people with jobs, friends, and families who get mixed up in mysterious and/or dangerous situations, often against their will. They are fragile, vulnerable, imperfect, and they, largely, know it.

“Composure” is a mechanic that helps you know it too. I’ve given a deeper explanation of the Composure mechanic in the post linked here, but I’ll give a very very very condensed version in this post. Composure can sort of be thought of as “emotional/fatigue HP,” (and no, it is NOT “sanity”) it acts as a guideline for how well your character is handling the situation, and when it gets low enough, it starts to have serious mechanical effects as well, because a character’s stat modifier can never be higher than their current Composure level. Fear, hunger, and fatigue all lower Composure, and eating, sleeping, and bonding with one’s fellow investigators can all restore it, at least for normal people. More on that further down. All you really need to know for now is that when Composure gets below zero it starts eating into HP, so characters can even pass out or die from loss of Composure, and also one single bullet is enough to permanently cripple a character, and the rate of Composure loss during combat reflects how serious that is for the characters.

Grievous Wounds

It isn’t too uncommon for RPGs to have some sort of “flaw” system, whereby in character creation you can give your PC “flaws” or some kind of penalty, and usually get that balanced out by being able to add extra bonuses elsewhere, and these “flaws” may take the form of disabilities.

Critical Role’s Candela Obscura, the whole document of which is one of the most egregious examples of liberalism and toxic positivity I’ve ever seen in the TTRPG space, takes this beyond just character creation, and makes it so that if a PC receives a “scar” in combat that reduces their physical stats, their mental stats automatically go up by an equivalent amount, and proudly asserts that to make any mechanic which functions otherwise is ableist. I think you can probably tell what I think of that from this sentence alone and I don’t need to elaborate. Getting bogged down in all the failures, mechanical and moral, of Candela Obscura would make this post three times as long.

I actually do think that as long as you aren’t moralizing and patting yourself on the back this hard about it, “flaw” systems in character creation are a pretty good idea in most cases, it allows for more varied options during character creation, while preserving game balance between the PCs.

But in real life, people aren’t balanced. The events that left me injured and disabled didn’t make me smarter or better at anything—if anything, they probably made me stupider, considering the severity of the concussion! Some things happened to me, and now I’m worse. There’s no upside, I just have to keep going by trying harder with a less efficient body, and rely more on others in situations where I am no longer capable of perfect self-sufficiency.

Denying that a disabled person is, by definition, less capable of doing important tasks than the average person is to deny that they need help, and to deny that they need help is to enable a refusal to help.

This is the perspective from which Eureka’s Grievous Wounds mechanic was written.

When a character is reduced to 1 HP, which by design can result from a single hit from most weapons, they may become incapacitated, or they may take a Grievous Wound, which is a permanent injury with no stat benefits. Think twice before getting into a shootout.

Grievous Wounds don’t have to result from combat, they can also be given to a character during character creation, but not as a trade-off for an extra bonus.

“But then doesn’t my character just have worse stats than the rest of the party?” Yes, didn’t you read the above section? There is no benefit, except for the opportunity to play a disabled character in an TTRPG, and this character will probably have to be more reliant on the rest of the party to get by in various situations. Is that a bad thing?

Monsters

Just like mundane people in Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy, monsters are playable, because they are regular people. I’ve gone over this in other posts and also you can just read about it in Chapter 8 of the Eureka rulebook, but the setting of Eureka doesn’t have a conspiracy or “masquerade” hiding or separating supernatural people from normal society. They exist within normal society, and a lot of them eat people.

Most RPGs consider monsters to just be evil, they do evil for evil’s sake. RPGs that seek to subvert this expectation often instead make monsters misunderstood and wrongfully persecuted, but harmless. Eureka takes a wholly different approach.

There are five playable types of monsters in the rulebook right now, and it’ll be seven if we hit all the stretch goals, but for simplicity’s sake this post will just focus on the vampire. Despite them applying in different ways, the same overall themes apply to nearly every monster, so if you get the themes for the vampire, you’ll get the gist of what Eureka is doing with monsters in general.

I mentioned Composure above, and how it can normally be restored by eating food and sleeping. Well, vampires can not restore their Composure this way. They don’t sleep, and normal people food might be tasty as long as it isn’t too heavily seasoned for them, but it doesn’t do anything for them nutritionally. Their main way to restore Composure is fresh living human blood, straight from the source. To do what mundane PCs do normally by just eating and sleeping, vampires have to take from another, whether they’re happy with this arrangement or not. They do not, of course, literally have to, and a player is not forced to make their vampire PC drink blood, just like you don’t literally have to eat food, but they do and you do if you want to live in any degree of comfort or happiness, or else they’d eventually just sit at 0 Composure and not be able to effectively do anything.

There’s a reason that this is a numerical mechanic and not simply a rule that says something like “this character is a vampire and therefore they must drink blood once every session,” and that is to emphasize and demonstrate that the circumstances a person faces drive their behavior. In America, there is a tendency to think of criminality and harmfulness as resulting from something of an intrinsic evil, but in my experience and observation, people do not just wake up at like age 16 and decide “I think I’ll go down the criminal life path.” Through their life circumstances they have been barred from the opportunities that would have given them other options. People need food, food costs money, money requires work, work requires getting hired, but getting hired requires a nearby job opening, an education, an impressive resume, nice clean clothes, a charismatic attitude, consistent transportation, and so on. For people without, criminality is something they are funneled into, which becomes harder to avoid the longer they go without consistent access to their basic needs. The choice will be between taking money from others by force or trickery, or running completely out of money.

As the Composure counter ticks down, a vampire, or other playable monster, is going to encounter much the same dilemma. There is little to no “legal” or “harmless” way for them to get their needs met, even if they do have some money. Society just isn’t set up for that. And no your kink is not the solution to this, trying to suggest every vampire get into sex work is like one step removed from telling every girl she should just get an OnlyFans the minute she turns 18, or that women should just marry a man and be a housewife that gets taken care of if they want their needs met.

Playable monsters in Eureka are dangerous, harmful people. They were set up to be.

“Oh well then the vampire should just eat bad people!” You mean those same bad people i just described above? See this post for answers to all the other arguments people are going to make to try and absolve vampires of causing harm.

Society not being set up for that brings me to next reading/theme: Monstrousness as disability, and monsters as takers.

Mundane human characters restore 2 points of Composure per day just by eating food and sleeping, but vampires do not, they can’t. To restore their Composure they have to take from others a valuable resource that everyone needs to live and the extraction of which is excruciatingly painful and debilitating (blood). No one knows what happens to blood after a vampire drinks it, it’s just gone. Vampires are open wounds through which blood pours out of the universe.

This is a special need, something they have to take but cannot give back. Their special needs make them literally a drain on society and the world.

Even in so-called “progressive” spaces, there is a tendency to consider takers, people who take much more than they give back, such as disabled people, as something that needs to be pruned, with the mask over this being the aforementioned total denial of the fact that disabled people take more than they can give.

In this way, vampires and other playable monsters are, inarguably, “takers,” but in positioning them as protagonists right beside mundane protagonists, Eureka puts you in their shoes, and forces you to at least reckon with the circumstances that make them this way, as well as acknowledge their inner lives. You have to acknowledge two things: That they are dangerous, harmful people who take more than they can give, and that they are people. Because they are people, Eureka asserts that they have inherent value, a right to exist, and a right to do what they need to do to exist.

One final point is that of monstrousness as mental illness. Mental illness is a disability, one pretty comparable to physical disability in a lot of ways, so all of the above about disability can apply to this metaphor as well, but there are a few unique comparisons to make here.

It’s not the most efficient, but there are a couple of loopholes deliberately left in the rules that allow vampires to restore Composure without drinking blood. Eureka! moments can restore Composure, and Comfort checks from fellow investigators can restore Composure.

When I was writing the rules for how monsters regain Composure in accordance to these themes, I came to a dilemma where I wasn’t sure if it was thematically appropriate for them to be able to regain Composure in these ways, but ultimately I decided that yes, they can. It works with themes of mental illness, which is mental disability.

People with mental illnesses may have the potential to be harmful and dangerous, but study after study, including my own observation, has shown that mentally ill people with robust support structures and agency allowed to them to handle tasks are much less likely to enact harm, be that physical violence, relational violence, or violence against the self. So that’s why I kept that rule in for playable monsters. Being able to accomplish goals, and having friends who are there for them, makes the harmful person less likely to cause unnecessary harm.

I couldn’t really figure out where to fit this paragraph in so I’m sticking it here right before the conclusion: Vampires are especially great for this because they’re immortal, and because they always come back when “killed.” They can’t be exterminated, they aren’t going away, there will always be problem people in society, no matter how utopian or “progressive.” They’re a never-ending curse, who will always be a problem. The question is how you will handle them, not how you will get rid of them.

In conclusion,

Eureka is as much a study of the characters themselves as it is the mystery being solved by the characters. It is a harsh, but compassionate game, that argues through its own gameplay that yes, people do have needs which drive their behavior, many people do have special needs that are beyond their ability to reciprocate, and failure to meet the needs of even a small number of people in a society has high potential to harm the entire society, not just those individuals whose needs are unmet.

And Candela Obscura sucks.

Back Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy on kickstarter before May 10th if you want to help a disabled person with limited ability to work pay his bills.

If you want to try before you buy, you can download a free demo of the prerelease version from our website or our itch.io page!

If you’re interested in a more updated and improved version of Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy than the free demo you got from our website, subscribe to our Patreon where we frequently roll our new updates for the prerelease version!

You can also support us on Ko-fi, or by checking out our merchandise!

Join our TTRPG Book Club At the time of writng this, Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy is the current game being played in the book club, and anyone who wants to participate in discussion, but can’t afford to make a contribution, will be given the most updated prerelease version for free! Plus it’s just a great place to discuss and play new TTRPGs you might not be able to otherwise!

We hope to see you there, and that you will help our dreams come true and launch our careers as indie TTRPG developers with a bang by getting us to our base goal and blowing those stretch goals out of the water, and fight back against WotC's monopoly on the entire hobby. Wish us luck.

[beranibear]

Things that make me happy in Melbourne (feat. cow in tree)

[cotton-candycurls]

My life is a weird conversation of 'am I a pillowprincess/bottom or am I chronically ill (undiagnosed)'?

[savingthedeadwebcomic]

Hello! I have an ongoing webcomic called “saving the dead” I’m looking for someone who volunteer to caption it

I started captioning it myself last year and finished the first 4 chapters but I got overwhelmed and couldn’t find a volunteer back then so I just gave up

But I figured it will be best to make the webcomic more accessible since it’s generally a good idea and especially since disability pride month is coming up and there’s some themes in it about how disability (autism specifically since I’m autistic) is treated by society. But I feel like it would be fair to make it more accessible for others too.

Another thing I wanna mention is that when I started the webcomic I made a lot of dumb decisions when it comes to editing. I made a lot of text too blurry and there were some pretty small speech bubbles to make way for shitty background I thought was good at the time. There’s also a lot of grammar mistakes since English is not my first language. Also I’m pretty young so I guess that’s also explains all of that. So if there’s something you don’t get just let me know

Also you will get credit for it! just write your name/username/however you wanna be credited when your captioning wherever you feel is necessary

So yeah! If you want to help me caption it, DM me

[mielthebee]

This is so important, and it’s why I focus a lot on accessibility for regulation.

We can try “fixing” a lot. But you can’t “fix” people. You shouldn’t have to try to. Our bodies understand what we need. Pain is the way our bodies tell us that something is wrong, and when we lose that sense we can end up in dangerous places.

In making this world accessible, we cannot forget that no matter what happens, people are going to need tools to regulate. You can’t just turn off the light and say “oh that should fix it”. The body needs time to transition between that stimulus and stop the ringing in my ears. I need time to REGULATE.

And sometimes we need tools. Chairs, weighted blankets, medications, stuffed animals, ice packs, warm tea, prayers, crying, singing, excersising, these are all tools we use as ill people (mental or physical) that allow our bodies to have a time and safe place to regulate. To complete the system of messages your brain sent to you telling you that “something is wrong”.

If our brains are like computers, your input is higher than your output. And your brain can’t complete the circuit because the wires don’t have the right conditions to transfer that voltage that “it’s fixed”. And sometimes that means the body keeps the score for a lot longer than it needs to.

I will work hard to make it safe to regulate at my university.

"disability only exists because the world isnt accessible" idk how to tell you this but chronic pain still hurts

[serenhob]

I saw this video today of a republican woman (forgot her name) who said, quote:

'Women are like 'oh well I'm autistic, my husbands autistic and we have 7 autistic kids and actually we are all fine and thriving', hi OK so that's not normal, that's actually an issue. Why do you have autism and why do all of your kids have autism'

It startled me cause how are there people like this and I just wanted to remind us all that autism is largely genetic.

Crazy concept I know. Yes, science does agree that there are outside factors that they've seen that *could* influence whether a child is autistic (particularly having older fathers) but the majority of the time (up to 90%) it is simply the matter of genetics. Most autistic people have autistic family members whether they are diagnosed or not (personally my sibling also is and we suspect with my mother). So obviously, if you have 2 autistic parents that greatly increases thr chances of having autistic kids. The same as if they both were brunette or blue eyed or they wear glasses. Their kids would likely share those traits.

From the side always arguing about 'basic biology' I think its kinda funny that it stops as soon as we get to autism. It's like they pick the most stupid argument for every issue they are presented and run with it. We have many studies that over and over affirm the role of genetics (like twin studies) but apparently that all is a lie and we should be looking back at studies that have been debunked (the 1998 study in particular is so stupid, the mans medical license was literally stripped and out of the 12 kids he had, some weren't even autstic)

Also on the 'its an issue' part, autism isn't this scary, infectious and fatal disease. It is a neurotype, a type of human being. You can't seperate the autism and the person. Yes, there are negative sides to autism, violent meltdowns, harmful stims, the isolation of not understanding people, overstimulation and all of that, but that doesn't mean there aren't positives as well. Besides, it is a human experiance and for everyone there are strengths and struggles.

(Also just to address the autism epidemic vibe this is giving, the reason the diagnosis rates are higher is the following: the expansion of the definition of autism aka autism spectrum disorder which includes lower support needs; research of how autism presents in women and people of colour as it used to be reserved for affluent white boys; medical care becoming more accesable in general; the growing population (again if you've got an autistic person haveing two autistic children then both of them go on to have two autistic kids each and so forth then there will be more autistic people) due to life expectancy going up; awareness of autism in general; the inclusion of masking to the diagnostic criteria and probs more. Its not vaccines)

Autism isn't inherently less worthy than being allistic, a household full of autistic or otherwise disabled people isn't automatically worse or more harmful than a family of allistic, abled bodied individuals. In fact, operating in a neurodivergent house as a neurodivergnt person is often times quite good. Having the relatability and understanding between neurodivergent people is very helpful. Like personally all of my friends are autistic (not on purpose) simply because I find autistic people easier to interact with. There is less conflict.

Autism like every state of existence is neutral. Disabled doesn't mean inferior, nor is it intrinsically bad. Autistic people are just as worthy of compassion and life as anyone else, no matter their support needs or if they have an intellectual disability. So yes, autistic families and people at large aren't abnormal or an issue in any way. If you want to help autistic people then advocate for more support (especially given to high support needs autistic people and their carers) instead of to 'eradicate autism'.

[littleroseprince]

🔥autism communication cards lego monkie kid red son (purple themed) pt2

pt1

pt3

[whereserpentswalk]

Answering each question:

"Why is jasper trans?" Everything about her evokes the worst stereotypes of trans women (and butch women, and intersex women). She's tall, has a deep voice, a masculine face and figure, and is violent and aggressive. Just like how the things meant to make peridot seem evil are the things that also make her seem autistic, the things that are meant to make jasper seem evil are the things that also make her seem transfem. The entire relationship she had with lapis seems like something straight out of terf propaganda: a transfem coded character violently doing the closest things gems have to sexual assault to a petite feminine woman, because she covets something cis coded lesbians have.

"The it could have been great thing" agreed. That's an example of an autisitc coded character not picking up on social qeus, an NT coded character reacting with violence, and the autisitc character being the one who the narrative blames.

"Homeworld is also cold and utilitarian?" That's the perfect example on how peridot's villainy is portrayed through her autism. Her autisitc traits are directly tied to the evils of the series villains. The fact that the gem empire is shown to be evil because they give autisitc people rights doesn't reflect well on the writing.

"What about accepting that you're not able to do things?" This isn't a bad storyline for amethyst, but it's a bad thing for peridot. There is a big difference between a disabled person not being allowed to do something, and not being able to do something. And everything peridot can't do on earth is something she could do in space, where she was given accessibility devices and was treated with respect. I once saw a post which I've now lost, that said the difference between can't and not allowed becomes clear when you ask "what would it take for me to do this" and the answer becomes clear. For peridot we've seen her do the things she wants to do, or at least do equivalents with her limb enhancers, she just lost the ability when she was put in a more restrictive environment and had accessibility devices taken away, and any irl disabled people who've had either of those things happen should know that accepting it like an inevitability isn't a good solution, the solution is to regain those options for accessibility.

[anomalousmancunt]

since the topic of the week seems to be accesibility, i want to mention some accesibility issues i've encountered that just... don't seem to be talked about.

so. my sense of direction sucks. that's something i've accepted - i can orient myself via landmarks, but that isn't always possible (both because sometimes there aren't any landmarks/ones i can easily remember, and because sometimes i need more specific directions; i could guide you through a forest, but sadly i am not a deer, so). it's equal parts the autism messing up my ability to navigate certain enviroments, and the brain fog making it so that sometimes i just. get lost. i also cannot walk for too long, nor can i stand up still too much.

as you may guess, getting lost is... kind of a big issue. some of my friends, who do not have these struggles and/or have them differently, are able to either orient themselves quicker or keep walking until they find a spot they know - this is a good solution for them! it's not doable for me, though. i also can't often ask for directions, because stress tends to cause me to lose speech (and pain, too - since standing/walking tends to be painful, well...).

this means that, say, even if i'm on a building fully accesible for my mobility issues (meaning elevators, scalators, etc*), if it isn't accesible for my navigation issues (like, say, it doesn't have maps easy to see, signs indicating where certain landmarks are, etc), then i cannot use the building. not alone, at least.

in an emergency, i'm fucked - not because i couldn't get to the exit/a safe spot physically, but because i wouldn't be able to know how to get there. and "following people" also isn't easy - crowds are so deeply overwhelming that most of the time i'm unable to follow them**, and i'm also slow at walking, so even being able to keep up with people isn't always possible (or likely).

places i've enjoyed going and considered accesible to these specific issues had big maps not too far from each other and clear signs indicating main landmarks (bathrooms, food courts, STAIRS i cannot thank the people in charge of the signage enough for marking where stairs/escalators/elevators are, etc). sadly at least where i live this isn't really common - a lot of the signage is small or unclear, there's like one map at most.

*i am not including ramps on this list because my mobility issues, and the fact that i don't use mobility aids, make it so they're sometimes harder for me to use - they're really important but this is a personal experience post.

**as in i will freeze and/or run on the other direction to avoid bad sensory input. during high stress situations and without someone as support i cannot stay in a crowd.

[ratguy-nico]

2# Father of the Bob

And this is a perfect example of a great episode beyond a holiday special episode (I didn’t even realized that it was a christmas special until I read the series wiki)

The episode gets me since minute one. Since the very first scene I knew this episode would be it. And is just that this first scene is devastating, seeing how Big Bob demerit Bob’s efforts and ideas, he doesn’t even take a moment to think about how this hurts Bob, it’s not important, is not a moment that would mark Bob for life, is just another day. It makes me sick.

Then I saw the 15 minutes rule, and it reminded me so much of my own relationship with my grandma that Big Bob became immediately a villain in my head, some hurtful man who didn’t care about his son, but oh boy if I was wrong.

Big Bob is not a villain, is not a bad man, he’s just a very imperfect dad. Because yeah (for me) Big Bob is not a good dad, not a bad dad either, and I get this for others episodes as well.

Big Bob wasn’t a great dad, he loves Bob of course, but he also hurt him deeply over the years and since a young age, but how the serie deal with this is what amazed me. Big Bob in this moment of his life, where he thinks he already lost his son, is still trying to change, which is huge for me.

Big Bob, even if at first didn't wanted to admit it, understand why Junior go, why they couldn’t work together and finally recognize that he made things in the wrong way, and he is indeed trying to change and be more accesible and communicative, we see more of this in further episodes. But he doesn’t do this expecting for Bob to go back, he does it because is the right thing to do, is what needs to be done.

I’m not trying to say Bob wasn’t also in the wrong, cause he was, but he’s the one to extend the branch of olive and he does it in the best way possible.

Who knew this man could actually communicate his feelings in such an on point way. Damn.

And know that we are in this scene and I have to clarify this next part is my brain looking too deep into things. (pls bare with me)

For me this whole scene in Pete’s Gay Bar alludes not only to Bob’s burgers ideas or him running away from Big Bob's Dinner, but is also about his sexuality (and maybe even his autism).

Bob can not believe his father is just so comfortable in this kind of place, surrounding by people that are just like Bob, this parts that Bob always thought his father couldn’t accept, this parts of him he couldn’t even voice out loud himself. Cause in this scene is obvious they both know, but they just don't talk about it. Bob assumes Big Bob will never accept it and Big Bob try to not mention it cause he doesn’t get it, but he wants to get it, want to understand, but he doesn’t tell Junior any of this, maybe under the assumption that Junior doesn’t even care cause it just too late.

The line “You have weird and happy kids” broke me. Big Bob knows as well as Bob that the kids are different, neurodivergent, but don’t have the knowledge to refer properly about it. Big Bob accepting the fact that the kids are weird but still amazing and, most important, happy as they are, close the circle of him rejecting his son in the past for being weird and ungrateful (not happy) and for the cherish on the top he says “You are a good dad” cause yeah Bob is certainly doing it better than him at the past.

I really love this episode so much, maybe even more that the actual Top 1 but for now here it is. Is a complex episode, that I could see over and over and still think more about it.

EXTRAS

I love how passive-aggressive Linda is with Big Bob, she really wants for him and Bob to have a good relationship and she forced as she does with her own parents. But in this and other episodes is clear that she doesn't forgive Big Bob for all the things he put Bob trough.

The kids are the glue on the episode. With their innocence and naivety in the matter they get to bring the family together. They don’t get why their dad doesn't like Pop Pop but they don’t really care, they like their Grandpa and that’s what matters.

I kind of ship Big Bob and Pete, there it is I said it. Leave me alone. This destroy all my discourse but I just love the idea of Big Bob finding love again and in this man that obviously support him and like him the way he is, they get each other. Shut Up! leave alone.

Oh and "Baby You Can Chive My Car Burger" is so special to me, I'm just waiting for the right moment to cook it, is like one of my dreams in real life.

[theforesteldritch]

I'm scared for the future because. Even in a college dorm idk if I'll be able to handle the level of independence I need. My executive functioning skills are sososo bad and I need space on my own but also support easily accesible, and while I'd have more support in place at home I can't. I really can't keep living here for another year I don't think. And so I can't bring this up to my mom because she already doesn't think I can handle it and I might not be able to but I need to try because what I can't handle even more is staying here.

It's almost ironic the way some of my symptoms of autism and ADHD presented- a bunch were missed when I was a kid but stuff like how disabling my poor executive functioning is didn't really present until my teens because the level of dependance younger kids have on parents kind of masked it for me. It didn't show itself *as* much because I had those external supports that did it for me basically. But now that I'm more independent, it came crashing down.

I'm scared because I need independence from my parents so much for myself but I genuinley don't know if I can work around my disabilities enough for that. It scares me.

[tetsunabouquet]

I just read an article which talked about important life skills just now, and it actually inspired me to write this piece because my story perfectly illustrates something. Now, I've already tried to stress in my responses to that writer who wanted to write an action piece about an autistic John Wick character last year about how people with autism struggle more in a life or death situation and it's not realistic. I've also called out the autistic community for their demonizing thoughts about the neurotypical community. Let me tell you a story about a specific program in the Netherlands and Belgium that teaches kids an important life skill which I struggled with as a kid because I was disabled and how learning how to be like neurotypicals actually DOES improve our lives. As a kid I struggled with things requiring motor skills to the point I had to take physio therapy classes for basic P.E things like throwing and catching a ball. With the way some people in the autistic community make trying to be taught anything regarding our disability to be like neurotypicals a bad thing, I should have just embraced that I was incredibly bad at these things. Not only is that dumb, but it literally was my hurdle in that life skill class. You see, in the Netherlands and Belgium, because we have a lot of water and are susceptible to floods, we have swimming classes, and these don't just teach you forms of swimming. Nope. These swimming classes have three levels, with a certificate and an exam class for each. A. This level teaches you basic swimming skills, the forms, how to stay afloat, how to swim with your clothes on and how to dive a couple of meters. The three last things I mentioned, are all to prepare a kid what to do if the area got flooded. B. This is mostly the same as your A level, but the meter distance for diving is way bigger. A level basically teaches you how to get out of a building if you are near the exit and level B prepares you how to get out if you are nowhere near an exit and need to hold your breath way longer. Ever heard of those swimmers who give shows dressed up as a mermaid? That's Level B stuff over here. C. This is the most advanced of all the levels and teaches you basic lifeguarding skills so you can also save other people and not just yourself. In the Netherlands, they have become slightly less accesible and funded because the last big flood was in the 50s. However, Dutch parents typically still have at least a certificate of an A level and still push their kids to take swimming classes. It's because of Dutch parents still valueing swimming classes, that there are actually higher percentages of immigrants drowning during the summer season opposed to ethnic Dutch. Because they and their kids don't think it's a big deal to pursue a swimming certificate whilst the average Dutch parents had the danger of water drilled into their skulls when they were kids and that swimming is a primary life skill which they in turn teach to their kids. The Dutch southern small town I grew up in, was actually near the area of the big flood in the 50s and with my maternal family being from that area, obviously they thought it was highly important for me to at least graduate from A level. I literally spent more then twice as long as the other kids getting my A level because I am disabled. But in the end, I did accomplished and graduated from A level classes when I was 8 years old.

My mother was the only parent attending our swimming exams that actually created a banner, especially for me. She was so proud of me finally getting my A level. I actually get a smile on my face whilst typing this because of how happy and proud I was too. If it wasn't growing up in a ghetto that taught me that a disabled person struggles more in life vs death situations, then swimming class certainly did. Disabilities aren't superpowers even if it makes us better at certain things. They create more danger for us in these types of situations, and I'll never stop being proud of reaching my A level. Toxic positivity and the autistic bums who see any attempt of improving their disability as 'an ableist society trying to force us to fall in line' can kiss my ass.

[cotton-candycurls]

Hi, I hope you're doing well. I'm writing to you with a heavy heart and an urgent request for help. My family is in a very danger situation due to the ongoing war, and I've launched a GoFundMe campaign to save them. Could you please reblog my campaign post from my profile? Each share could be a lifeline for my family. 🙏 Feel free to share it in any other social media platform if you would like. Our campaign has been verified ⭐️ by operation olive branch, and is entry number 26 on their spreadsheet. Also with ⭐️ Project watermelon,line 249/(212) on their spreadsheet. From the bottom of my heart I want to thank you in advance for all of your support and kindness.