#being so much more prominent in peter's performance

[selkiewife]

“I wish...”

A Song of Ice and Fire: A Storm of Swords, Tyrion X by George R.R. Martin | Peter Dinklage as Tyrion Lannister in GAME OF THRONES: “The Laws of Gods and Men,” Season 4, Episode 6 | Alice in “Vinegar Tom,” by Caryl Churchill.

[jake-04]

I did some research on Bauhuas for a history of rock course. The information might not be 100% accurate but I’m kinda proud of how it came out. The performance I mentioned is the 2005 Coachella Performance.

In the 70s there was a specific subset of people, known as “bat cavers”. These people would dress up in messy hair known as the “bats nest” and wear black clothes with black on white makeup. These people were also seemingly obsessed with morbid and spooky topics. Today people like this are known as “goths” and the popularity of this subculture can be attributed to the release of 1979’s “Bela Lugosi’s Dead” by post punk band, Bauhaus.

At the time of release post punk wasn’t related to goth people so much as it is today, so one can imagine the public’s shock after hearing this eerie 10 minute track about a dead actor. What made this song so special was the eerie tone of the guitar, strong drum backbeat, distortion, and the morbid theme of the lyrics. This song can be loosely placed into multiple genres, the most striking of these being the reggae genre. When compared to genres surrounding reggae, like 2-tone ska, it becomes more apparent.

This cemented what the post-punk genre would become over the next 40 years. Post release, the song was described as “gothic”, thus sparking the new genre and subset of music culture.

“Bela Lugosi’s Dead”, on the surface, is a ten minute song about a dead actor, specifically, the actor that played Count Dracula in the 1931 film “Dracula”. However, there are multiple ways to look at the lyrics. The most prominent being the description of Bela Lugosi’s burial. Apart from the repeated “Bela Lugosi’s Dead”, there are three lines that outline this exactly. The first line is “the victims have been bled.” This can be seen as the preparation for the burial where the embalmer rids the body of fluids and unnecessary items. “Red velvet lines the black box” is a reference to how Bela’s coffin was lined with red velvet. “The virginal brides file past his tomb” is his visitors walking by his tomb.

However, if you know about goth culture and its origins, there is another meaning to these lyrics. “White on white translucent black capes, back on the rack” can be seen as the commercialization of this sub-culture of people, the same can be said for the line “the victims have been bled” where the victims are the bat cavers who’ve been bled of their culture. “The bats have left the bell tower” is referring to the closing of the old goth club “The Bell Tower” in London and also about the term “bat cavers” “leaving”, or being replaced by the term “goth”.

The performance that I have linked took place at Coachella in 2005. Bauhaus was on stage, shrouded in darkness, and started with the simple drum backbeat. The entire band is dressed in gothic black clothes and the stage is barely lit once the lights come on, adding to the eerienes of the band and its music. The lights come on at the first beat of the drum to reveal Peter Murphy, the vocalist, hanging upside down as if he was a bat. Right off the bat this performance is very gothically inspired. Everyone in the crowd is excited and screaming. At one point the bassist crosses his arms over his chest as if he was Dracula rising out of his coffin. Bauhaus is an excellent example of a post punk band that really took on the gothic themes of the genre.

Thanks for reading! 🖤

[loverlylight]

So I've made it pretty clear how much I love VHSCC, so since we don't know if there will be a way to watch this specific performance again once the digital tickets are no longer available, I wanted to write down some of my favorite bits that I don't see people talking about that much. Warning, this gets long, so apologies.

Acting:

-Line deliveries I loved: The Match Girl's increasing desperation when trying to sell the matches, "Bob Cratchit" in I'm The Ghost, Scrooge and Belle being so awkward and sweet together, "That's offensive, okay" when Scrooge said the Cratchits seem pretty poor, "I'll toast my hope that he dies" and "Makes you wonder how long he'll last" in Priceless, the Match Girl's "Woohoo!" in Christmas Day

-Physical acting I loved: Bob walking away and Scrooge stops him so he slowly walks back and sits down so he can have Bah Humbug yelled at him, Scrooge's little "no"s about the happiness about Christmas and then being like "yeah that's it" when Christmas Present is like maybe you're a greedy dick, Scrooge learning the Christmas Electricity dance, Jim and Della as the couple in The Final Ghost (Jim is SO happy Scrooge is dead!), Scrooge crossing his fingers when waiting to hear what day it is

-Pretty sure Curt flips off Scrooge after the "after you" gesture in Bah Humbug which is especially hilarious since he's pretty much in the Young Scrooge outfit at that point. Honestly though Curt's background acting is always fun.

-Brian is a great Fred in general, but I especially love the "even though you're a total dick" line and how he tries to hug Scrooge when he's about to leave.

-Love Jacob forcing Scrooge to sit down, but I also love the whole hand circling the face and slashing across his neck at the "your old partner who's dead" line.

-Look I know I'm showing favoritism here but Curt as baby Scrooge just looks like he's so sad but trying to be stoic about it and just poor kid. Also, it was only for a second but Curt and Lauren as Young Scrooge and his sister plus Scrooge and the Ghost of Christmas Past talking about her afterwards makes me cry so much. Especially them laughing in excitement about spending Christmas together, just...

-The "grateful I don't have what Tim has got" line is always hilarious, but I love how Peter takes the mike from his mom and is standing very quietly and politely before the very enthusiastically sung line and the awkward double shrug afterward.

-The "NO!" and the blue light and the spirit singing words for the first time and of course people have mentioned this but Scrooge pleading to the stone-faced people he refused to help is just... MAN. This whole song was amazing, but that climax was suitably climactic.

-Bob pulling Scrooge in for a hug, Marley holding his hand, Della patting his cheek, I'm gonna cry--

Music:

-How well Christmas Day, Bah Humbug, and the new opening number tie into each other, especially the Bah Humbug tune being prominent in the opening and the "past present and future" lines

-How well Christmas Day was rearranged to add the new parts of the story, those additions genuinely feel like they were meant to be there all along.

-Unless I'm forgetting something, the only time Meredith joins Clark in the narration is during Christmas Day, which even more makes it feel like it's Marley singing and not just as part of a chorus.

-The "Christmas Day" bit and "Christmas Eve" bits are very similar rhythmically but different tonally which is fun.

Staging/lighting/costuming/et cetera:

-The TV/VHS tape signifying death/the afterlife! While we do see Jim behind the TV at one point, the only people we see on the VHS tape part of the stage (apart from the band) are those who are dead/spirits. All the spirits in Christmas Carol enter the stage that way whenever they appear, as does the Grandma in the Match Girl, and the Match Girl herself steps onto the tape to signify her death. It also helps facilitate Meredith switching from being in the band to active story participant and AUGH it's so good!

-The backwards "c" on the Match Girl's sign

-The lighting during the song before Grandma Land! The lighting throughout the whole show is amazing, but almost all the time there's a lot of bright neon colors, so it's utilized amazingly when the colors cut out whenever the matches go out and it really sells you on the feeling of cold and isolation and stark reality.

-From what I can tell for the rest of the show only one of the rewind/pause/fast forward buttons are lit up at a time, but when all three spirits first appear they're all lit up at once.

-The Ghost of Christmas Present's outfit is awesome, the light-up shoes most of all <3

-I love all the sparkly outfits at Fred's party (I mean obviously all the costuming throughout the show is A++), but especially Lauren's dress and Curt's jacket. I want that jacket. I would have exactly zero occasion to wear it but still.

-Fred with the sparkly Santa hat and the sunglasses~

More Gift of the Magi thoughts:

-I love how much Curt and Janaya show how much Jim and Della love each other, why each of them loves the other and why the other loves them, it's just... Jim and Della are so clearly in love with each other and it's absolutely precious.

-The "21 dollars and zero cents" part is AMAZING.

-Even though losing what they cherish most stung in the moment, they're only thinking about the other person afterwards-- Della's worrying about her hair is more about what Jim will think and not her own loss, and Jim is so excited to come home and it's the "best Christmas Eve ever" even though he just gave up his watch.

-Jim in general is the personification of love and sunshine and has one of the most contagious smiles ever

Just silly things:

-Oh hey it's the second deadliest man alive from Spies Are Forever. Seems life took him on a better path this time, good for him.

-Another addition to the Lauren Lopez playing Curt Mega's mom collection.

-Look, if we're cool with the whole crossing over VHSCC and Hatchetfield concept, I want Peter Cratchit to be Pizza Pete. I know he's probably too young for it to make sense but I like the idea of Curt Mega selling the place to Curt Mega

[rebeccalouisaferguson]

“Sometimes we get a bit niched,” says Swedish actor Rebecca Ferguson in her slightly lingua-divergent English, “and become the kick-ass woman or the sci-fi woman. I hope not to be that.” She has played a lot of different kinds of roles, she points out, starting with her year and a half in a Swedish soap opera while she was still at high school; more recent prominent roles that weren’t at all kick-ass include her Jenny Lind, the opera singer, in The Greatest Showman and a medieval English power-player in the BBC series The White Queen. It was playing a spy of dubious loyalty in Mission Impossible, however, that made her not only a star, but one of the very few women known as action stars.

Rappelling from a Viennese rooftop with her legs wrapped around Tom Cruise’s hips: that’s how we think of Rebecca Ferguson. “I don’t seek those roles,” she says. “When scripts come, I don’t look for the physicality and not take it if that’s not there. But for some reason those roles have come to me and I’ve done as well with it as I can.” Mission Impossible led on to Dune, the second part of which is due out soon. She loved that. ”I think we need to see women who are really great at fighting, in stories where the fighting is seen to be necessary to protect someone else. That’s what I like about Dune: everything is there for a reason.”

Silo is based on a series of fantasies – nine so far, with one-word titles like Wool, Shift and Dust – by American writer Hugh Howey. The idea of living in an authoritarian closed bunker is a familiar sci-fi trope: the most familiar reference point is probably Peter Weir’s The Truman Show (1998), but Silo has more in common with George Lucas’ debut THX1138 (1976) and the enduring cult favourite Logan’s Run (1971). What lured Ferguson into Silo’s grey, steampunk gloom? “I was drawn to the world,” she says. “Not to the sci-fi, post-apocalyptic fantasy world – that never interests me – but it was the fact that people were living underground in a claustrophobic environment, due to something they themselves had created. I liked the philosophy of that.”

She was also drawn to her character, a mechanic known for her genius at keeping the 140-year-old generator’s boiler running, whose promotion to sheriff comes as a shock to everyone. Juliette Nichols has a fierce yearning for truth and justice, but she is also cranky, unkempt, bitter, unsmiling and, through some strange alchemy of performance, decidedly plain. We don’t much like her; neither does the camera. “That’s what made me fall in love with her,” says Ferguson. “I find the forced likeability so uninteresting. Also, what she’s gone through wouldn’t make you likeable. Wouldn’t put you in the pocket of wanting to be touched, seen, loved. There is a reason why she’s good with mechanical things.”

Ferguson found international fame relatively late in life. She is 39, child of a Swedish father and eccentric English mother, now a mother herself to two children. On Zoom she is strikingly still, intense and has a translucent Nordic beauty that suggests a blameless life sustained by nothing but wild salmon and cloudberries. I wonder if there were any new skills she had to learn as the formidably capable Juliette. “I think what I found challenging and fun was not being good at certain things,” she says. Nobody in the silo can swim, for example; nobody has ever seen a sea or a river. “So in a situation where water is filling up, how do you activate a body that does know how to swim without looking cartoonish or silly? I’ve known how to swim since I was a little child, and those things are really difficult to relearn.”

The question that underlies any story like this one, of course, is how would we would cope living this way? They would chew that over on set, Ferguson remembers. “The tricky one, though, is that you can ask those questions: how would you react, what would you have done – but you can’t forget that they have lived there for 200 years. So you have to first think: ‘What is reality to them?’ They don’t know what ‘outside’ means. All they know is that there is something there. What’s fascinating is the philosophy of people who just follow the rules. You can compare it to the society of Big Brotheror the Second World War and Hitler, greed and power and banning books and taking things away from people and pushing them into a compact little environment to control them. It’s a bit like a religion as well. I’m scared of anything that tries to control our narrative.”

The higher purpose of dystopian fiction is, of course, to tell us about our own world. Were there parallels she spotted, even people she recognised? “I think it’s very difficult as a thinking human being to not see resemblances between what you do and the real world,” she says. “Some things happened after it was written – like we live in a silo and then COVID happened. But I think human beings when they create things will constantly pick from their environment, right?” Every now and then she would spot something in the script that made her think yes, that was smart, people will get that. “But I keep coming back to the idea that all the battles are the same, wherever we are.” In The White Queen, for example, where she played Elizabeth Woodville, wife of the deposed Edward IV, whose sons were murdered. “It’s the same battles there. It’s power and greed and needs, the same issues heightened and minimised. There’s always been chaos.”

[twistedtummies2]

The Price May Be Right - Number 26

Welcome to “The Price May Be Right!” I’m counting down My Top 31 Favorite Vincent Price Performances & Appearances! The countdown will cover movies, TV productions, and many more forms of media. Today’s pick features Vincent as one of a whole cavalcade of creeps! Today we focus on Number 26: Lionel Grisbane, from House of the Long Shadows.

I talked about this film last year, when I discussed my Top 31 Christopher Lee Performances. “House of the Long Shadows” is a horror-comedy cult classic, and one of the few good movies (in my opinion) produced by the schlock masters of Cannon and Golan-Globus. The film is a typical murder mystery movie, set inside an equally typical creepy old Victorian mansion. However, the movie manages to become something special largely due to the actors involved, as the movie features four of the greatest horror icons who ever lived: obviously, this includes Vincent Price and Christopher Lee, but also their mutual friend, Peter Cushing, and the great John Carradine. For those who are new or do not recall: the film focuses on a young writer, Kenneth Magee. After receiving a special author’s challenge, he decides to spend the night in a seemingly abandoned old manor house to try and whip up some inspiration. However, things begin to go askew when the Grisbane Family – the owners of the mansion – return for a bizarre reunion, along with the mansion’s future owner, a businessman known as Mr. Corrigan. Price plays one of the Grisbane brothers, Lionel: a drama queen of the highest order, Lionel is given to grandiloquent speeches and seems to say and do nearly everything in a florid, theatrical manner. He is arguably the most prominent of the Grisbanes, as it is Lionel who delivers much of the exposition around why the family has come home…and what the dark secret they all share pertains. Once again, this is essentially a self-parody role for Price, and once again, those are always fun to see. What really makes this particular instance of such a part special, however, is simply the presence of so many great stars of the genre onscreen together, and the chemistry they share. The fact that three out of four of them were best friends in real life is a big part of what makes their interactions so memorable, and the differing personalities of their characters rebound off one another in a way that’s truly wonderful. The plot has many twists and turns, and Lionel is an active participant in several of them, either by helping to relate seeming facts to us, or being involved when the ACTUAL truths are unveiled. There’s really not much more to say; if you’re a fan of these performers, you owe it to yourself to give this picture a look. Tomorrow, the countdown continues with my pick for Number 25!

[mickgaydolenz]

I’m in the middle of studying astrology at my local library rn and just kind of came up with this theory, if you will, that I think would be worth sharing.

I think Mike related and liked Micky much more over Peter mainly because since Micky and Mike have quite a handful of samesies placements (Asc/Dec/IC/MC/Rx Jupiter/T-Square and Yod formations/Cardinal + Mutable signs prominent; too lazy to locate similar aspects but there is for sure) they view and may even experience life in a similar fashion, so they really were leaning on each other whenever they had an event in their life - be it good or bad - because they know what it’s like, naturally empathetic for one another. There’s a lot of examples I could throw in which enough should prove that. And it’s not that Peter and Mike don’t have some natal chart relations, because they do. But compared to Mike and Micky, it doesn’t make a single dent compared to those two.

This has been another informative astrology post from the local Monkee astrologer 🌟

KALE!!!! (i hope you don't mind me using your name btw) DUDE, BUDDY, AND PAL!!!! THIS IS AMAZING WORK!!!! oh man i loved this so, so, so much thank you for being the REALEST and doing this research!!!

and honestly i can see this completely!!! i think i know some of the examples you are referring to as well of them leaning on each other (like micky and mike conferring on how they should handle touring after davy's passing, and also mike reaching out to micky before deciding to appear on portlandia). in general there are just so many little throw away comments they've made, micky especially, that leads me to believe that the two of them definitely turned to one another throughout their time in the monkees and beyond to make decisions/seek reassurance

EDIT!!! -> how could i forget when mike came out and performed with micky during one of micky's solo tour dates or when micky went to see mike when he was touring solo!!! not to mention micky wearing a first national band t-shirt during one of their monkees concerts.....

[nebulousfishgills]

✨️Fishgills' OC Masterpost✨️

I figured now was as good a time as any to introduce the little gremlin ladies that inhabit my brain and most of my stories. Basic information as well as prominent fics and other fun little extras :3

(Based on @can-of-pringles​ lovely OC masterpost)

Olivia Iridottir

-Avengers/Marvel Cinematic Universe-

Aliases: Olivia Laufeyson

Bio: Orphaned from a very young age, Olivia Iridottir, goddess of dreams, was taken into the Asgardian royal family and eventually came to fall in love with Loki. Spunky with a kind heart and a bit of a tricksy streak of her own, they make a formidable duo wherever they go. Unfortunately their relatively peaceful lives start to take rocky turns after Thor’s coronation goes awry. Asgardian Royalty to Avengers to Revengers and beyond, it ends up being a very... very long 12 years.

Naturally, however, being so closely connected to Loki means that Olivia’s life can take some extreme detours. Maybe she follows her path perfectly, being the yin to Loki’s yang throughout the best and worst of times. Maybe she makes a wrong decision and finds herself beyond the bounds of time trying to free the universe from a silent oppression alongside a very hardened (yet beautiful) female variant of Loki. Maybe in another universe she abandons her good morals entirely all because some poor time intern accidentally infected her brain with a rogue, rather enchanting entity.

Olivia’s choices have a lot of power. More than she could have ever fathomed.

Paired With: 

Loki Laufeyson

Sylvie Laufeydottir (Conditionally)

Minor Associated OCs:

-> Aemon Kynson, Olivia’s father. A general in Odin’s army, he is killed during the war between the Aesir and the Jotuns

-> Iri Avyadottir, Olivia’s mother. The head military medic and a childhood friend of Frigga’s, she is killed during the war between the Aesir and the Jotuns

-> Lyanna Oliviadottir, Olivia and Loki’s daughter, eventually grows to be the goddess of luck

-> Edmure Lokison, Olivia and Loki’s son, eventually grows to be the god of peace

-> Various Variants, pruned offshoots of Olivia trapped in the temporal Void

-> Carson Ambrose and Maya Adams, OCs belonging to two friends of mine who are featured in these stories, paired with Bucky Barnes and Peter Parker respectively

Spotify Playlist:

Fancast: Emilia Clarke

Featured in: Earth's Mightiest, A Song of Stars and Magic, Time Variance Detected (Book 2 Coming Soon)

~~~

Keira Browning

-Sam Raimi's Spider-Man Trilogy-

Aliases: Keira Osborn

Bio: A brilliant chemist with a penchant for singing (ABBA in particular), New York born and MIT educated Keira Browning climbed her way up the corporate ladder at Oscorp until an accident involving spilled coffee catches the eye of the CEO, Norman Osborn. Once they get to talking, they find out about the many things they have in common. Norman admires her work ethic and brilliant mind, while Keira finds herself realizing that her supposedly intimidating boss is actually... really nice? After multiple dates and a meeting with Norman’s young son Harry goes better than expected, Keira marries into the Osborn fortune. 

Everything was going fine, perfectly even, until those damn performance enhancers just refused to work...

Paired With: 

Norman Osborn

Minor Associated OCs

-> Donna Browning, Keira’s mother, a headstrong housewife who doesn’t pay much attention to the news

-> Richard Browning, Keira’s father, a Vietnam veteran who works in construction that thinks very highly of Oscorp

-> Siobhan McDermott, the Oscorp front desk secretary and Keira’s designated ‘mom friend’

-> Yvette Carew, a chemist under Keira’s delegation and her chaotic best work friend

-> Anthony Castelli, Keira’s childhood best friend and the choir teacher at Midtown High School

-> Anna, Anthony’s wife and another close friend of Keira’s

-> Sophia Caroline Osborn, Keira and Norman’s daughter born just three months before her father’s tragic death

Spotify Playlist:

Fancast: Carrie Lynn

Featured in: Facade

~~~

Emily Ripley

-Stranger Things-

Aliases: Emily Mulder, 004, Emily Ballard, Emily Creel

Bio: Abandoned by her mother after her birth, Emily spends her first ten years in an abusive orphanage before fleeing after a fire-related accident. She spends two years on the streets before happening upon Hawkins Lab. Taken in by Dr. Brenner and designated as Test Subject 004, she meets and forms a bond with Test Subject 001. Eventually they are forced into orderly roles, 001, aka Henry, gaining the alias of Peter Ballard while Emily adopts the last name of Ripley. For years they’re trapped and tortured by Brenner until a series of events leads to their Soteria chips being removed by Test Subject 011 and they rampage and kill nearly everyone in the lab. Eleven fights back and banishes them to the Upside-Down, a parallel dimension they come to tame.

Emily emerges on the Overworld periodically to keep closer tabs on Eleven and her friends, posing as a high school student who’s the second in command/best friend of Eddie Munson. Eventually hers and Henry’s long laid plans begin to unfold beginning with the unfortunate death of Chrissy Cunningham...

(Note: As of now, it’s theorized that Henry is Eleven’s biological father. I’ve adopted that theory and made Emily Eleven’s biological mother after Brenner tried to crossbreed his two older experiments; Terry Ives was the unknowing surrogate)

Paired With: 

Henry Creel/Peter Ballard/001/Vecna

[See Next Section]

Minor Associated OCs

-> Florence Joan Mulder-Thompson, Emily’s mother who got pregnant at 17 and chose to give Emily to the oprhanage lest she face her parents’ wrath

-> Samuel Thompson, Emily’s father and Florence’s boyfriend/eventual husband. He has no knowledge of Emily’s existence

-> Katherine Thompson/Two Unnamed Boys, Emily’s siblings, unaware that they have an older sister

-> Lucy Harris, a girl Emily had a crush on when she was in the orphanage. She, like the other kids, called Emily a freak or a demon because of her strange habits and unsettling demeanor

-Clarissa and Dora, two other girls at the orphanage who ended up on the wrong end of Emily’s lighters and childhood wrath

-002 and 003, two early experiments preceeding Emily’s arrival at Hawkins Lab. Their escape is part of the reason Dr. Brenner moves on to the subjects 002-018 we see in the lab when Emily and Henry are orderlies

Spotify Playlist:

Fancast: Olivia Cooke

Featured in: His Tenebris Moenibus, Diplopia, The Weirdo from Saint Valentina's, One Shots: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

~~~

Emily Ripley

-Twilight-

Aliases: Emily Volturi

Bio: It’s 1987, not long after the earthquake that split Hawkins. A newly transformed Emily, a de-Vecna’d-Henry, and a resurrected Eddie attempt to seek out food on the surface world since Emily and Eddie can’t feed on the creatures of the Upside-Down without hurting themselves. Their Gate somehow gets redirected to Volterra, Italy to be faced with the Volturi, the silent but deadly rulers of the world of vampires the Hawkins gang hadn’t known existed before that. Problem is, one of the three rulers bears a striking resemblance to Henry and, what’s more, is completely enamored with Emily. 

After bottled up feelings erupt in an explosive arguement, Emily seeks comfort with Caius and has to come to terms with the fact that she’s falling in love with him, too. Being pulled in two different directions, Emily has to choose between Henry, their decades long bond, and their mission, or Caius, providing the life of comfort and the family Emily’s always wanted.

Paired With: 

Caius Volturi

Athenodora Volturi (Conditionally)

Minor Associated OCs:

-> None (surprisingly)

Spotify Playlist:

Fancast: Olivia Cooke

Featured in: Diplopia, Necrosis, One Shots: 1

~~~

Other minor OCs

-Lydia Roberts (Sweeney Todd)

-Lord Irinerys the Illustrious (Star Wars: The Old Republic)

-Aneadora Fír (Dungeons and Dragons)

-Marlina Nerys (Thirsty Sword Lesbians)

[watching-pictures-move]

The Roger Moore Morally Compromised Mini-Marathon | Shout at the Devil (Hunt, 1976), Gold (Hunt, 1974) & The Wild Geese (McLaglen, 1978)

Mild spoilers below.

There's plenty you'll have to wince through when watching Shout at the Devil, which depicts the African continent as a playground for white adventurers, which relentlessly infantilizes its black characters while lingering over their dead bodies after they've been violently killed, which has as its most prominent African character a mute played by a white actor who is all too eager to hang villagers, and which has a character go undercover in blackface during the climax, as a cherry on top of a big ol' racist sundae. And this is not to mention that it asks us to root for an entirely self-interested ivory smuggler and features a poaching sequence so exuberant that the heroes are practically high-fiving each other as they kill a shitload of elephants. (Although a disclaimer assures us no animals were harmed during the making of the movie.) Unsurprisingly, the movie was produced in Apartheid era South Africa.

But I think Roger Ebert in his review, despite glossing over the film's issues, gets at its essence pretty succinctly, correctly noting that it's about the unironic embrace of jungle adventure movie with all its pleasures and idiosyncrasies. And if you can wince through all those aforementioned elements (and it's perfectly okay if you can't), you find much to enjoy here, starting with the team-up of Lee Marvin and Roger Moore, in incorrigible scoundrel mode and dashing but self-deprecating mode, respectively. Even the introduction of Barbara Parkins as Marvin's daughter and Moore's love interest doesn't sink the film, as Parkins is able to complement both of their performances pretty nicely and give the movie a bit of heart. Everybody knows all girls have cooties, but Parkins and the movie take measures to mitigate their spread.

There's also the fact that Peter Hunt, who directed one of the best Bond movies and edited a few others of similar pedigree, is a really good action director. There's one great scene where the heroes ambush a German convoy going down a hill, and the sense of diagonal movement snowballs, powered by both the astute editing and the unexpectedly gruesome violence, which, along with all the dicier elements, makes this feel like an exploitation movie despite the A-grade production values.

Compared to Shout at the Devil, Gold, an earlier collaboration between Peter Hunt and Roger Moore is maybe a bit easier to get through, in that it offers some semblance of self critique for choosing to film in Apartheid South Africa. Here, the gold mining industry is depicted as a purely amoral enterprise, the kind that is happy to kill off its own employees for short term gain, or, you could infer, maybe do business with a repressive regime. And it shows at least nominal sympathy for its black characters (and treats them as actual characters). A lot of the movie is about traversing through corporate politics, which I probably find more interesting to watch than the average viewer (a bizarre side effect of being a business major), although it must be said that Moore has great chemistry with his co-star Susannah York, and we get a pretty appealing performance from Ray "Dial M for Murder" Milland as the gruff patriarch. Hunt's talents as an editor are somewhat underused, but I like the way he presents the mine as one big machine, with a series of moving parts working in unison, all integral to its proper functioning. All that being said, the fate meted out to the villains feels like something from a dumber movie, and for some reason there's a Bond style theme song and opening credit sequence but with gold mining instead of racy silhouettes. (If you want more serious Moore, I'll recommend The Man Who Haunted Himself, which makes a pretty nice case for his acting talents and gives him some unexpected vulnerability. Also, he has a mustache.)

And of course I had to cap off my Roger Moore morally compromised mini-marathon with a rewatch of The Wild Geese, a movie that I've grown a real affection for, thanks to both familiarity, and the fact I'm a sucker for these old school men on a mission movies. Listen, the politics here are awful, and even more cringeworthy is the movie's attempt to hide it by pairing the deposed African president the heroes rescue with the most racist member of the group. Winston Ntshona and Hardy Kruger, the actors playing the president and the racist, respectively, both took their roles hoping for a serious movie about racism and African geopolitics. That seriousness did not materialize in the finished film, which resolves these issues with a quick conversation by the one hour thirty-two minute mark, at which point it can get back to shooting and blowing stuff up. For what it's worth, Ntshona and Kruger are actually committing to the material, and Kruger is especially good, although the movie plays its hand by allowing Kruger to articulate his mixture of racial resentment and isolationist views with unusual clarity while saddling Ntshona with vague platitudes. (And if you think racism is the movie's only questionable stance, it also relentlessly pokes fun at the one gay character, although it does eventually give him some good scenes.)

A bit easier to enjoy, perhaps at the movie's expense, are the presence of Richards Burton and Harris. I understand both of them were not allowed to drink during the production, and while I am not a good enough judge of alcoholism to tell if they look hungover from sneaking sips at night between shooting hours, or angry because they haven't been able to drink, there's an undeniable booze-adjacent contempt in their performances. (For what it's worth, Harris looks more cheerful, but I've found him the more innately energetic actor from experience.) The other big star is Moore, who gets by on his natural charisma but isn't as good as he is in Shout at the Devil or Gold or his Bond movies.

Honestly, for the first half, the movie seems to be rather badly made, shooting scenes in the most drab, limp way possible and resolving every confrontation with as few hiccups as possible. An attempt to rescue a character being hunted by the mafia ends with the mafia abruptly lifting all the contract put out on him. The siege on the base where the president is being held ends with no losses for the heroes, the guards all being sprayed with cyanide gas in their sleep or killed instantly with a crossbow. These characters are supposed to be highly trained professionals who can do this in their sleep, and that's basically how it plays, for better or worse. But complications do eventually arise, and the movie thankfully gets a lot more exciting. There's a half hour or so in the third act where the characters are retreating through the bush from a rapidly advancing army while trying to secure an exit, depicted as a near constant stream of close quarters gunfights and on-the-fly defensive tactics. As limp as Andrew V. McLaglen's direction is in the first half, he wisely gets out of his own way here, moving things along at a fast clip and letting the shooting, bleeding, dust and wilderness do the talking. (For something that feels tonally like a classic WWII era actioner, complete with rousing score, it's quite a bit bloodier than you'd expect.) It's a great action scene, and goes a long way in warming me up to this movie.

[humanoidtyphoons]

I haven't seen the BBC Musketeers show, partially because I've gotten into the book rrecently and also because I'm disappointed in reading about their incarnation of Rochefort. How is the show?

I liked how the book version of Rochefort was like a rival you'd see in a shonen; over confident older guy that frequently fights the younger protagonist in the same fighting style, follows the same code of honor, works for the villains but isn't too evil, and ultimately becomes friends with the protagonist after several times.

I wouldn't be surprised if at least some anime antagonists are directly based on Rochefort, Japan does have a fanbase for classic France literature.

I would say on the whole the show is pretty good! I feel like s1 is fantastic and a must watch, s2 is decent and mostly enjoyable, and s3 I don’t remember much about beyond disappointment. Costumes are great, it’s charming and funny and it’s a lovely take, for most part. S1 especially has the romp and adventure that’s so prominent in the books.

s1

-totally captures a swashbuckling feeling! great fun! good dynamics between the four! they’re all such loveable musketeers! you really feel the bonds for aramis & porthos as a loveable duo, athos & d’artagnan as old/young contrast, but them as a group and various combinations remains adorable to the end.

-they cast howard charles as porthos, and give an episode to his backstory, which i liked a lot, because it gave a really good historical explanation to having moc musketeers.

-i think they do right by constance/d’artagnan, and constance in general, making her a more fleshed out character, who lives to the end. tbh i was more won over by the ship in s2, but i think s1 was… fine for them, even if I’m pretty meh on how they handled her husband. don’t love it but it’s not especially a great role, not particularly likeable but at least he’s not oblivious to his wife having an affair. (i don’t think he found out in the book but… i could be wrong?)

-love athos. surly, alcoholic, aloof. his actor tom burke is perfect starting off indifferent to slowly regaining his former self, and how d’artagnan is the push he needs, breathing new life into him that continues in s2… and prolly s3.

-i think santiago cabrera is great as aramis, and how they explain how a spaniard is a musketeer. i think there’s an episode about the french-spanish war? it’s an episode about his backstory that features jj feild, who i adore.

-luke pasqualino surprisingly good as d’artagnan??? not quite as hot tempered, but still feisty and youthful and endearing in enthusiasm, that i enjoyed his portrayal a lot!

-maime mccoy as milady. wonderful! s1, she mysteriously appears and disappears in smoke constantly. the show is more sympathetic to her than the book, tho, but i’m super into the passionate lovers who can’t move on/kill each other/bound by their past, in s1&2. and i think for most part, the portrayal is satisfying, even if she’s not AS sociopathic, richelieu does tell her off for killing TOO much.

-peter capaldi as richelieu is amazing. it’s a great and nuanced performance that makes me wish he stayed on—altho maybe the plan was always one season, idk! but he’s riveting and i love him, and at his best here.

-there’s an episode where the musketeers hustle for money, in which porthos woos a widow. made me surprisingly happy because they do that in the book too! and it being handled here was good? (he actually stays with the widow all three seasons which is cute tho.)

-love the captain of the musketeers! treville is delightfully grumpy and i enjoy his ever growing role throughout the seasons!

cons:

-don’t particularly like queen anne/aramis getting a romance tbh. as hilarious as it is to have athos snidely whisper “you slept with the queeeeeeeen!” iconic, tbh, how it continues in s2-3, with aramis being the father of the dauphin… meh.

-tbh don’t love aramis sleeping with the lady that richelieu is seeing? it’s only a pilot issue, i think, and i get that aramis is a womanizer, but. meh.

-d’artagnan dad dies in the pilot. one day there’ll be a version where he’s fine and his son writes him letters, but… not this version.

-the king. is. probably accurately portrayed stupidly. i think his actor is very good, in all honesty. but the character is a lil infuriating to watch bc of how he blindly obeys and is fooled by people and has temper tantrums. might be more of a s2 issue, where he starts dating milady and believing rochefort, but. hmm, elements are probably here too.

s2

-it’s mostly good? the chemistry of the musketeers remains perfect, tho it departs from the book more so.

-love the messiness of athos/milady/king louis. milady sticking around makes things complicated for these two, but i’m so into it, bc yeah, athos/milady are clearly not over each other.

cons:

-rochefort. god i was thrilled initially bc a) marc warren, yay! b) NO EYEPATCH!!! (christopher lee is a wonderful rochefort but that movie starts the trend of rochefort having an eyepatch and… i hate it actually…) But then, he’s creepy obsessed with Queen Anne, and they give him an eyepatch in the final episode anyway, and his downfall is disappointing and pitiful tbh. He’s just so one note and a waste of an actor, that, yeah, I’m disappointed by it. I will say Anne saying “not once have I thought of you” was pretty neat tho, since they knew each other when they were younger, and she was initially happy to see him again.

-the continuation of the anne/aramis storyline bc she’s pregnant with his child… don’t particularly love that, and how aramis is dating the caretaker of his son once the dauphin is born? she dies, predictably. (actually the dauphin might have been born in s1, and s2 might have had a timeskip, my memory is pretty hazy since it’s been years.)

s3:

uh. everyone gets a happily ever after? there’s a time skip. athos starts dating sylvie, introduced in s3. they’re… fine.

-i think the season could have been good because there are two villains, one played by rupert everett as maquis de feron, who could have been interesting, and i think i read has some historical basis? but they do very little with him in the end. and then there’s grimaud. who was just very boring and pointless.

-milady is brought back for one episode, mainly bc the actress was pregnant so had less time to shoot. where she and athos cut ties for good, and he’s now in love with sylvie and he’s happy, and… yeah. not the way i wanted it to go, but c’est la vie.

-if you’re invested in constance/d’artagnan, anne/aramis, porthos/the widow, athos/sylvie, they all live happily.

tldr, i liked it initially, how it incorporated other historical elements, didn’t mind the divergences so much in s2, but i checked out a lot in s3.

but the camaraderie between the musketeers is cute, so I would still recommend s1-2, despite the flaws, and if you really want to finish the story, s3, but I wasn’t especially a fan of it.

re: book!rochefort. right??? he and d’artagnan deciding to be friends was adorable and I was delighted in Twenty Years Later, at their reunion!!! Why don’t adaptations include this instead of having Rochefort killed off??? >_<

ahaha, probably! There’s the anime dogtagnan, right? They do like Lupin a lot! I loved anime les mis! and anime gankutsuo was a good count of monte cristo for most part. altho now I do want examples of a similar Rochefort & D’Artagnan friendship in anime, bc it’s super cute, and R&D can’t be the only time that happens! i’ll try and be on the lookout for some similar dynamics bc it’s cute.

[twittercomfrnklin2001-blog]

It Should Happen to You

Pauline Kael used to say that screwball comedy was killed by pressure groups that didn’t want to see their demographics held up to ridicule. I don’t know how true that is, but certainly the more serious bent in American life following World War II helped create a world where nobody wanted to see themselves as screwballs. Then along came Judy Holliday. She had no trouble assuming Carole Lombard’s mantle as “the daffy Duse,” even if her films kept making us pay for laughing with her. For most of George Cukor’s IT SHOULD HAPPEN TO YOU (1954, Criterion Channel, Tubi), she’s deliciously demented as a young woman determined to become famous for being famous. Unlike in BORN YESTERDAY (1950), where we’re asked to pay for all the fun by having her learn the error of her ways, this film’s resolution isn’t all that traumatic. In fact, she’s allowed to remain as screwy as she was at the start.

Gladys Glover (Holliday) originally came to New York to make a name for herself. When she loses her job as a girdle model, instead of using her savings to return to Binghamton, NY, to marry the second man who proposes, she rents a billboard on Columbus Circle and plasters her name on it. A big-time soap magnate (Peter Lawford), who wants the sign for his company, trades her six other prominent billboards, and suddenly she’s a celebrity. That doesn’t sit well with her boyfriend (Jack Lemmon, in his first billed film role), a documentarian who finds her thirst for celebrity distasteful, but it lands her an unscrupulous manager (Michael O’Shea) only too happy to make a fortune off her.

Garson Kanin’s screenplay is smart. He takes his potshots at celebrity culture, TV and advertising without lingering over them, and having written three earlier films with Holliday knows exactly the kinds of lines that work for her high-pitched, perpetually surprised delivery. Cukor directs all this gracefully. His tracking shots are almost musical. And he helped Lemmon adapt to film acting by showing him how to keep his performance grounded in reality. The two stars work beautifully (they’d reunite later that year for the very good divorce comedy PHFFFT). His offhand line delivery matches up with her pixilated line readings to give their scenes an improvisatory sense. Most of them feel lighter than air. Even Lawford comes off well, in a mostly thankless role. When he tries to seduce Holliday, his physical grace is sexy but also funny.

It's a curious thing, though. Holliday was typed as dumb blondes, but it’s really grating to hear her called “dumb” on screen. Broderick Crawford had to pay for it big time in BORN YESTERDAY, as do the crooked executives who don’t take her seriously in THE SOLID GOLD CADILLAC (1956). So, when her fight scenes with Lemmon lead to his calling her stupid, it feels wrong. She’s given us too much fun for us to accept that she’s merely stupid, particularly since she’s been smart enough to get what she wanted. It’s a major accomplishment that Kanin and Cukor get the film back on track quickly and regain the buoyancy of Holliday’s earlier scenes. With Connie Gilchrist as a wise-cracking landlady, Whit Bissell as an advertising executive, Jack Benny foil Frank Nelson as, what else, a floorwalker, John Saxon in an early bit as a teen in Central Park, and Constance Bennett, Ilka Chase and Wendy Barrie as themselves. It’s some kind of comment on celebrity that even cast as herself, Barrie can’t play a believable human being.

[brendanmoviedate]

“Goodness Is Something To Be Chosen. When A Man Cannot Choose, He Ceases To Be Man.”

My favourite movie podcast, Blank Check with Griffin and David, is just wrapping up a series of Stanley Kubrick, which gave me the perfect excuse to rewatch some of my favourite films of his and fill in the gaps of ones I’ve put off for whatever reason. For some, I’ve seen multiple times, most only once, and a handful never before. 

Because everyone loves a listicle, I decided to rank the films and give brief thoughts on each of them.

13. Fear and Desire

Kubrick’s first feature film, Fear and Desire definitely feels like a filmmaker trying to find his feet. Serving as an anti-war movie without being about a specific war, Kubrick touches on sentiments that would find greater prominence in the wealth of Vietnam War movies in the 70s and 80s. The film has excellent cinematography, with Kubrick shooting it himself after a brief career as a photographer and documentary filmmaker, hinting at the great shots his later masterpieces would be known for.

This was my first, and likely only, time watching this.

12. Killer's Kiss

A slight noir, Killer’s Kiss is Kubrick’s final film before becoming a master filmmaker. While not breaking any new ground, the film is a solid noir, paving the way for his first real masterpiece, which we’ll get to in due time.

As with Fear and Desire, this was my first and only time watching this.

11. Spartacus

This feels the least like a Kubrick to me. In fact, it’s a film I was aware of as a kid well before I knew anything about Kubrick or any of his other movies. The “I am Spartacus” is so a part of film history and popular culture that it’s been ingrained in my brain since childhood. Having only watched it for the first time this year for Blank Check, I found the film to be iconic and powerful, but in a way more in keeping with the Golden Age of Hollywood than with Kubrick’s filmography. It’s definitely a Kirk Douglas and Dalton Trumbo film more than a Kubrick one.

I’ll probably watch this again, but more because it’s a Golden Age historical epic and less because Kubrick directed it.

10. Lolita

This was only my second time watching Lolita after having watched it 15+ years ago. My favourite part then remains my favourite part now - Shelley Winters. Her obvious advances towards James Mason throughout the first act of the movie are as hilarious as they are painful. Once her character exits the movie, it really starts to drag.

Peter Sellers is also great, particularly because his character keeps popping up in various disguises and brings the weirdest energy.

I don’t see myself rushing to watch this one again, but I might watch clips of the parts I liked.

9. Paths of Glory

This one surprised me. I don’t tend to love war films, as the list will attest, but this is more courtroom drama and satire of bureaucracy than war film. The generals are depicted as middle managers and all the shit trickles down to the lowest ranks after a disastrous and avoidable mission goes sideways. The satire hits hard and is heavier than in Kubrick’s later films when he starts to perfect the balance of light and dark.

As with all of his pre-Lolita films, I’d never watched this before. I’ll definitely watch it again some day.

8. Full Metal Jacket

The first act of Full Metal Jacket is so good that it would be impossible for the rest of the movie to live up to it. Had the movie just been the boot camp, it would have been much higher on the list. 

When I first watched Full Metal Jacket, I remember being bored to tears by the rest of the movie, again, because I don’t like war movies. However, on this watch, I quite enjoyed the second act, where Joker is acting as a journalist for Stars and Stripes magazine. The scene where all the writers are meeting with the editor-in-chief is quite compelling and features a great performance from John Terry.

I’ll probably give this one another watch down the road, and who knows, maybe I’ll come to like the third act too.

7. Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb

I’ll admit that I think Dr. Strangelove is overrated. The satire is too on the nose and some of the performances are too out there. With that being said, I do think there are some wonderful moments of subdued comedy from Sterling Hayden, George C. Scott, and Peter Sellers, which makes the movie work for the most part. Surprisingly, the Sellers performance that works the best is Mandrake, the RAF officer locked in with Hayden’s General Jack D. Ripper. His straight man performance rides the line perfectly between banal and absurd. Sellers’ other roles are too far one way or the other.

I’ll definitely rewatch this for the performances mentioned above.

6. The Killing

The Killing surprised me. It was a taut noir thriller centred on an elaborate heist at a race track. Sterling Hayden leads the ensemble cast of character actors each tasked with a different role in the heist, which all goes according to plan until it doesn’t. While I think this is an excellent noir, there’s still a considered gap between this and the next film on the list.

I look forward to revisiting this film on multiple occasions.

5. 2001: A Space Odyssey

This is Kubrick’s first masterpiece and the film that cemented him as a legend. Science fiction had never been so polished and full of ideas and rarely has since. Every modern sci-fi film is compared to either this or Star Wars, which itself owes a lot to 2001.

While the segment featuring Dave and Hal is often lauded and imitated, every sequence in this film is masterful and captivating. Here Kubrick is in complete control of every shot, every set, and every performance.

2001 is a classic and I’ll revisit it multiple times.

4. Barry Lyndon

While Spartacus may have been the highest profile blind spot in my Kubrick viewership, Barry Lyndon is the most egregious. Produced at the height of his powers, Barry Lyndon has all of Kubrick’s signature elements: deliberate camerawork, pitch black humour, and captivating use of music.

The film stars Ryan O’Neal, an actor I’ve been aware of for a long time, but have somehow avoided seeing everything he’s in. From the sounds of it, his character here is indicative of what he’s like in real life, which adds an extra layer to the film.

At 3 hours, it’s a difficult to take everything in. I look forward to future viewings to gain more appreciation for Barry Lyndon. 

3. A Clockwork Orange

I’ve seen A Clockwork Orange countless times now. Despite the troubling subject matter, it’s extremely watchable. Broken up into 3 distinct acts showing Alex’s criminality, rehabilitation, and reintroduction into society, with the first and third acts serving as mirror images of each other, the film expertly sets up multiple payoffs as the film heads to a conclusion.

Like nearly every Kubrick film, A Clockwork Orange is infused with comedy, of both the black and farcical variety. From Alex attacking a woman with a giant phallus to the head guard’s eyes popping out of his skull at the sight of a woman trying to seduce Alex, the film is rampant with ridiculous and broad comedy.

Though contemporary at the time of release, because of the pervasive use of brutalist locations and the idiosyncratic character actors, A Clockwork Orange feels very much a time capsule of 1970s Britain. 

2. Eyes Wide Shut

When Eyes Wide Shut first came out, I avoided it due in part to the negative discourse surrounding it, but mostly because I was 14 and the rumoured sexuality of the movie was too much for me to handle in a mature way. Flashforward 20+ years and I’m able to appreciate not only the sexuality I had misattributed to the movie, but also the complicated in’s and out’s of the relationship depicted between Cruise and Kidman. When I first watched it two years ago, I loved it and this viewing, being my second, only increased my regard for it.

Eyes Wide Shut takes all of the elements Kubrick has made a career of utilizing and combines them expertly, allowing the film to jump from drama to comedy to horror to thriller in a seamless way. In part because of juxtaposition and in part because of Kubrick’s craft, these different elements all land perfectly. The comedy is hilarious and the dread is overwhelming despite the film being neither a dedicated comedy or horror movie.

There’s a growing movement to make Eyes Wide Shut a Christmas movie - and while I don’t think I’ll ever be jumping on that bandwagon of making it a holiday tradition, I’ll certain make it regular watch as it’s quickly become one of my favourite films. 

1. The Shining

I first saw The Shining around the time Eyes Wide Shut came out. One of my friends was the first in our group to get a DVD player so we would often watch movies at his house on Friday nights. His player came with a handful of DVDs, including The Shining, so I was excited for a chance to watch it (after having seen the Simpsons parody episode countless times). Despite being 14 and in the company of a rowdy group of friends, I distinctly remember being enthralled for most of the movie. Once Jack ventures into Room 237, I remember the group of us exploding into revulsion and juvenile laughter. That image of the bathtub lady has haunted me ever since, despite not being that prominent of an element in the story. 

Having now seen the film countless times (and having watched the sequel and read both books), the magic of The Shining still hasn’t faded. With each viewing, I’m able to appreciate a different element of the film. In this case, the leisurely setup of transitioning the Overlook hotel to winter feels so cozy and comforting that I hardly mind the time it takes to get to the scares. 

All of the elements of the film work. With a set so meticulously constructed and iconically decorated, with pacing so deliberate, and with actors so dialed into their roles, The Shining is a movie that I will never stop loving.

[sgt-morgan]

☀️Knight and Day🌙

Part 1: Estrellita✨

Part 3: The Little Sunspot🍼

Moonknight Masterlist

Description: Moonboys as Girl dads. As god intended. Point blank period.

Warnings: Inaccurate depictions of DID as made cannon by the show, AFAB/ female identifying reader, depictions of childbirth, implications of sexy times, tooth rotting fluff.

A/N: This thing is long as hell, appreciate my love for you. They’re girl dads damn it! You’ll Never convince me otherwise! I love them! Reader is now Desi, because my momma is Desi. Beti= Daughter Beta= son Poti= grand daughter Nani= grandma Nana= Grandfather. Spanish you can use google translate or translate app for, Urdu is hard. (Also, tagging @castizell cause they asked all nice like.)

🌘🌔🌒

When you found out you were pregnant, it was a huge deal for your little families, but no two (four?) people were more excited than Cassie and your boys. You never had to worry about a thing, 3 am need for icecream? Jake is already driving to the store. Back aching? Marc will stand and hold your belly from behind as long as you need, arms shaking, with a smile on his face at how peaceful you look with your head leaning on his shoulder. Pregnancy hormones? Steven is eager to please in any form, from tears to tantrums, he’s there with a keen ear and able hands. Need a hand? Cassie is more than eager to help you tie shoes (Steven taught her how to do that), pick up a mess, or make everyone leave you alone with a bossy shout and a pout.

They were perfect angels right off the bat. Marc was scared, very, very scared. When he found out it was a girl? He was even worse. Worried about how he would perform as a father, worrying about wether or not he could handle the stress and chaos without becoming like… Well he didn’t want to think about that, but he was convinced that by the gods, he needed more practice. So, Cassie became a staple in your home pretty much immediately. Anytime she would ask to come over when Marc was fronting, she was always met with an enthusiastic yes. Marc would insist on caring for her. Offering to take her to dance for her (extremely) busy parents, cooking dinner for all of you, teaching her some of the Torah. (Yes, he taught her some of the Torah, good to get the practice in now. Your baby would be born to the wrong Jewish parent, her not being born of a Jewish mother, but you’d never had a DNA test, so who knows. He had forgotten a lot of it himself, so teaching Cassie also served as a brush up for him. All of the pregnancy stuff made him slowly start to reconnect with his father, they weren’t chomping at the big to see each other in person again, but at least there was a conversation there.) Regardless, Marc really liked hanging out with Cassie, and so did you, so it really didn’t bother you, except when they used her baby dolls to practice diaper changing. You didn’t understand how a plastic baby could cause so much mess, but if it kept Marc from bolting, you weren’t about to complain.

“Oh man, Purim was fun!” You giggled smoothing your hands over your stomach. It wasn’t super prominent, but it was steadily growing bigger.

“Yeah! I can’t even believe Cassie remembered the songs! Shocked honestly! I thought she could only memorize Frozen! She was also the cutest little Spider-Man I’ve ever seen.” Marked laughed, a little more drunk than you had realized earlier. “And your Dad reeeally loved the booing for Hama-“ you interrupted him by booing and he laughed even harder. Nuzzling his way into your chest to stifle his laughter

“Also, you totally cheated by just wearing your Moonknight costume!” You laughed, “We set the costume theme for Heroes, and you cheated!”

“I cheated? What about you!? Should I be questioning Matt about your costume? Huh? Dressing up as Daredevil babe, really? Matt even dressed up like you! Are you two secretly kissing?“ he giggled wiggling his eyebrows at you.

“No you big dork!” You laughed again. “The star of the show though was Peter! Dressing up as the Punisher? Brilliant. Did you see how pissed Matt was when he realized!? Priceless.”

You sighed, nuzzling into him fondly. “Also, really glad May sent home some of her Matzoh ball soup, I’ve been craving it for weeks!”

“I made you Matzoh yesterday!” He laughed, peeking up at you from where he had wrapped firmly around you, and you grinned mischievously, “Was that what that was supposed to be?”

“Babe! That’s mean!”

Steven was his normal stream of knowledge, it now just had a differing theme. Baby fever had come over him, and his weakness? Books. The baby already had a library, all kinds of books, every shape and size and color. Cardboard, hardbacks, signed copies, silly ones, sad ones, classics, myths, sci-fi, fantasy, it didn’t matter. Anything Steven fancied reading with the baby, he got it. He also wrote little notes in the books as to why he picked them. You never questioned him on this, but you read every single one with a grin.

‘This one is about strength and bravery, you can do anything my love! Don’t let anyone look down on you because you’re young. Thank the Gods you’re smarter than I am, Dad.’ (Written in a copy of Ender’s Game by Orson Scott Card)

‘This one is about the importance of compassion and kindness, stay gentle darling. Proud of you always, Dad.’ (Written in a copy of The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane by Kate DiCamillo.)

‘This one is about how silly peoples brains can be. Life can be a struggle, and your daddies and I understand. If you need help, without judgment, your mom and I are always here. Me and my silly noggin love you always, Dad.’ (Written in a copy of It’s Kind of A Funny Story by Ned Vizzini.)

‘If you want a good story about some gods, you can read it here. I’ll tell you my stories one day, but it’s not today. Sorry kiddo Love, Dad.’ (Written in a copy of The Lightning Thief by Rick Riordan)

‘No change is made without strong people sticking up for those who can’t stand up for themselves. I’m rooting for you darling. Always in your corner, Dad.’ (Written in a copy of The Hunger Games by Susan Collins)

‘Women are powerful, let nobody tell you other wise. You cannot be contained. Standing with bolt cutters, ready to set you loose on the world, Love, Dad.’ (Written in a copy of Circe by Madeline Miller.)

‘Hard things happen, but you’ll always have me and mommy when you need us. Supporting you always, Love,Dad.’ (Written in a copy of The Struggle Bus by Julie Koon.)

‘I am odd, and that’s ok. I know it can be hard to live with a daddy that is always changing while you change too, but just so you know, however we change. Our love for you never will. Love, Dad” (Written in a copy of I am Odd, I am New by Benjamin Giroux)

‘We love you no matter what you love! You will always be the most fascinating person I know. Do big things, dream big dreams. Love, Dad.’ (Written in a copy of Except when they don’t by Laura Gehl.)

‘Well kiddo, all daddies are different. And that okay! Your daddy is different in a special way, you got three in one! No matter which one it is, we all love you. Love, dad.’ (Written in a copy of Some Daddies by Carol Gordon Ekster.)

Steven over the course of nine months also really enjoyed reading to your ever growing belly, books of all kinds. Your baby girl constantly kicked, but when her Daddy was reading, she was as quiet as a mouse.

Steven loved the copy of Some Daddies the most. When he first saw it in the store, he was curious, so he bought it. When he read it, he cried. You lay next to Steven and rubbed his back while he read the book his head laying on your ever growing belly.

“Every daddy is different, every child is too!” He sniffled, placing a gentle kiss on your belly. “Oh man little one, your daddies are all very different I guess, but we all love you just the same. Keep baking in there alright? We can read more when you come out!” He whispered leaning up to kiss you too.

“Oh god, you are gonna be such a good dad!” You chuckled with watery eyes and kissed him softly. You really were a lucky woman.

Jake, as always, found a way to surprise you the most. This time, his surprise came in the form of taking over the nursery, and while he worked on it, he didn’t let a single other one of you know what he was doing. Every day, packages arrived, and under threat of… something, Jake hadn’t exactly divulged what the punishment was but none of you cared to find out, you put the packages outside the nursery door and left it closed. He came in and out of the room whenever he fronted with paint and boxes and toys and Steven’s books. Frequent banging and the sounds of soft punk rock fluttered out of there every once in a while, and you couldn’t contain your curiosity.

All three of you had tried to peak once, but somehow Jake’s fatherly sixth sense had developed early, and you hadn’t been able to catch sight of it.

“No peaking Cariño!” He startled you one day as your hand rested on the knob.

“Jake! Oh gosh, baby please? I just want a sneak peak?” you pleaded with those eyes and the low cut top that nearly always worked, but he just chuckled and pissed your pity lips.

“Nope! Lo verás cuando haya terminado.” He smiled and ushered you in the opposite direction. Steven couldn’t even grasp the handle, and Marc had smacked himself on the back of the head on more than one occasion. They only people allowed in the room? Allison and Cassie. You had seen them whispering and conspiring for weeks, your sister even going so far as to spend the night in the nursery once or twice to finish up work and keep you out. You loved how closely she bonded with the boys while it was happening.

“She’s gonna love it!” Allison squealed quietly, smacking your loving boyfriend over and over again on the shoulder with a smile. Jake shook his head and smiled at his sister in law while Cassie giggled. It warmed your heart to see how well he got along with them.

“Don’t worry about the nursery Hermana mía, he’s done. Allison is so excited for him to show you, they all really put the work in on this one. Cassie loved helping out.” Your brother in law smiled and rubbed your shoulder placing a kiss on your head. “They plan on showing you tomorrow, but you didn’t hear that from me.” He said with a conspiratorial wink.

“Oh Gracias, hermano, I’m dying to see it.” You huffed rubbing your belly.

“You know, I can hear you right hermano?” Jake groused from across the room. Your brother in law made a face that said yikes, and started running, dodging his angry wife and child as they chased him around the yard.

“You know what querida? It’s done, why don’t I show you now?” He smiled wrapping his arm around your shoulder and leading you towards your home.

Jake heard the hearty consent of his alters from reflections in the glasses from dinner and mirrors in the hall.

“Finally! We were left in the dark for too long mate!“ Steven sighed “I hope you made a place for all the books.”

“Yeah! I hope you got that Moonknight bear I saw, it’s too good of an opportunity to pass up.” Marc chuckled. “She’s gonna love it I’m sure!” He said when he noticed his normally immovable alter fidget nervously with his flat cap.

He opened the door to the rooms and an uncharacteristic silence took over the room. The nursery was stunning in hues of soft pinks and oranges, motifs of the desert covered every surface, including pictures of you and your husband in the desert on the walls. There was a camel shaped toy basket, little plush cactuses, and the tiny Moonknight bear tucked into the Moses basket in the corner of the room. The mural on the wall, (clearly painted by your sister) had a sun and moon motif, and a tiny mobile of the moon and stars with a tiny Konshu sitting in the moon hung above the cradle. Steven’s books were tucked into cabinets that were able to display all of their colorful title and shapes, there was even a framed Hebrew writing on the wall for Marc, though what it said had not been divulged yet.

“What’s it say?“ you said pointing to the framed writing with tears in your eyes.

“Uh, it’s the baby’s name? I know we hadn’t all settled, but in Latin cultures it is very common to have three names, so I figured why not go with all three of the ones we like? So it says, Aurora Ayla Elena Spector.” He shuffled his feet as he gestured around the room, “I went with a desert theme, because it seemed like it could be cute sabes? And there’s a little bit of everything in here. ¿Qué te parece?” You we’re quiet for a moment tears streaming down your cheeks that ached with your smile.

“It’s perfect!” You burst, throwing your arms around Jake with a sob. “Look at all of this! You did this? I’m amazed! you are so perfect! God! Could I be any more lucky? Podría besarte ahora mismo, ¡esto es lo más sexy que has hecho! Holy shit babe!” Jake chuckled at your clear excitement and smiled at his alters in the two mirrors he purposefully placed at angles where they could see the whole of the room.

“Jake, this is amazing! I love the shelves! They are perfect for this space!” Steven smiled, gesturing to the mobile “And the little Konshu? Adorable.”

“You really out did yourself man,” Marc smiled shaking his head, “It’s just her style. I love it. The Hebrew is amazing, who did it?” Jake smiled at him sadly, and Marc nodded with a sour expression. “I’m glad he knows, really I am, I just- I don’t. We can talk about it later.”

“Jake? It’s perfect.” You heard from the door way from a voice you hadn’t heard in a while, you whirled around and stood in the door with your sister’s arms wrapped around her shoulders was your mother.

“Momma!” You cried, flinging yourself into her arms.

“Oh my, it’s ok beti, I’m here now!” She laughed patting you on the back. “I didn’t know you wanted me to come so badly, but my mischievous little granddaughter face timed me about you crying and figured I would fly in a bit earlier.” You looked down to see Cassie clutched into your moms Sari and you

Sniffled petting her head affectionately. It seems she had been just as doting in her secret project as Jake had been.

“Surprise Tía! I know you wanted Nanni to come earlier, but you wouldn’t tell anybody, so I told the grownups and she’s here!” Cassie squealed squeezing your mother’s legs. “Was that ok? Did I do a good thing?” She said with wide eyes staring at all of her favorite women in adoration.

“Poti you have never done a thing wrong in your life!” You heard and saw your father hanging out with Andreas at the door. You cried a little harder and threw yourself at your dad sniffling.

“I’m so happy!” You wept as your dad gently swayed you back and fourth. He patted your back and smiled.

“I’m so glad your happy!” Cassie squealed, bouncing up and down in place.

Then, something unexpected.

“Oh my god,” you giggled, watching as Juno winked at you over your Father’s shoulders, you felt your back spasm, and knew it could only mean one thing. “Well, you have actual divine timing, I’m going into labor.”

The room exploded into action as you laughed with Juno, who was quick to reach out and grasp your back as the whole room scurried around you in a blur of excitement. Marc suddenly was thrust to front and startled your parents as his eyes rolled back into his head.

“Oh thank god!” Your dad laughed, “Good to see you Marc, I thought you might have just been passing out.” He said clapping him on the back.

“No, I didn’t, but I think Jake just did, he’s being mighty quiet in there.” He laughed, shooing Juno away from you as he began to support your weight. “You guys stick around and unpack, I’ll get her to the hospital, and call when it’s closer to showtime.” He said with a wink, helping you down the stairs.

“Ok Beta!” Your mother waved, “it was good to see you Marc, Say hello to Steven! We will clean up a bit and meet you there!” She waved and ushered you all out of the house, your sister and her family were all stood at the bottom of the steps, she held out Jake’s keys to Marc and gestured towards the car.

“We got the bag put away, the car seat is in tight- don’t say a damn word, I am just concerned about my Niece’s safety- Also? Jake? So help me god buddy, you better get your ass back out here, Marc is a terrible fucking driver-“

“Hey!” Marc exclaimed with a giggle, you openly laughed while whimpering in pain as Andreas helped you into the car.

“Don’t hey me buddy, you can’t drive to save your life- If my sister dies before I meet my niece I’m gonna kill you!” She grumbled slapping his keys into his palm. Marc tensed up and Jake was back again, kissing Allison on the cheek and patting her on the shoulder. “Very good, now drive fast pendejo, I wanna meet that baby in a hospital, not your back seat!”

“Sí, Los llevaré a salvo, no te preocupes.” With that Jake jumped in the front seat and you were off. One fast, yet oddly smooth, car ride later, and you and your boys had arrived. Marc took care of the whole checking you in thing, as he was the technical biological father, and then Steven took over for the whole birthing thing. You wouldn’t need to be in the hospital this early with a normal birth, but your doctor had declared that the baby’s positioning had put you at a bit of a higher risk, and he wanted to monitor her position closely just in case, so you were set to be here for a while. You were worried, as it was going to be more painful than normal and the risk of death was- it doesn’t matter. It wasn’t going to happen. It would all be fine.

Steven was an angel, feeding you ice chips, reading to you, rubbing your back, requesting ‘all the drugs’ for you while you were sleeping, calling your parents and sister with updates, truly keeping a calmer head than you thought he would. He was doing amazing.

You were laying, face pressed in his neck, one of his hands gently stroked your belly, his other holding the book he was reading to you while you practically slept in his arms, when Juno reappeared dressed in scrubs, for some reason.

“Hello, Juno! How’s our favorite Roman goddess then?” Steven asked, petting your head in an attempt to roust you to speak with your patroness.

“Owe, Juno? Oh she got stuck in Paris didn’t she. Well shit, this is fine.” You sighed, coming to terms with your divine doula very quickly.

“Go back to sleep, I hate she’s stuck but honestly I was kinda hoping she wouldn’t make it. I wanted to do it.” She waved with a smile, coming to readjust your monitors, checking how far along you were, instructing Steven on where to press his hand to relieve the most pressure in your aching back. She did a little more than a normal Doula, but as a patient advocate and birthing partner, you both couldn’t ask better than a goddess. As the hours continued to pass, Steven and Juno made sure you were comfortable, and helped you to get as much rest as physically possible while you were in so much pain.

“This is kind of you Juno, we really do appreciate it.” He sighed as you began to wake slightly, another contraction hitting your lower back with intensity.

“I’m honestly kinda shocked Konshu isn’t here.” You grumbled at one point after Juno grumbled with your doctor about comfortable birthing positions for you.

“Oh, that silly old bird has gone to find Taweret in order to bargain for an easier birth. He really can be a softy when he wants to!” She chuckles. “It’s very sweet of him, a little more added help is always welcome in these scenarios.” She smiled, smoothing your hair from your face.

“Thanks for your help my lady,” you smiled again, “truly, we aren’t worthy of such a divine companion in all this!”

“My child, you’ve proven yourself worthy for me time and time again, helping you with this is the least I can do.” Juno smiled brightly as she helped you to sit up in Steven’s lap.

“Damn, even my patron likes you more than me!” Steven chuckled, “he’s going to talk to a goddess for you, and he calls me a worm.” He says rolling his eyes while you laugh through your pain.

“Ok sweet girl, it’s show time. Steven? You might wanna move honey.” Juno smiled, going to retrieve your nurse.

About seven hours and a quickly healed broken finger later, you and your moon boys were the proud new parents of a little baby girl. She had your nose and Their eyes, their curls and your hair color. She couldn’t be any more perfect if she tried.

“My days,” Steven smiled, exhausted. “Look at that, just as pretty as her mum!” He smiled, running his fingers gently over her soft hair, placing a gentle kiss to your temple as he continued to just stare at the perfect little bundle sleeping in your arms.

“Thanks bub,” you huffed a laugh and placed a kiss to his collar bone. “You wanna hold her?” You smiled as more people flitted about the room, cleaning up the birthing area, setting up a crib, checking vitals. You however, seemed to be in your own bubble of calm.

“Yeah!” Steven sighed, unbuttoning his shirt as Juno instructed for skin to skin, while a doctor attached Aurora’s little hospital band. “Go on then!” He smiled opening his arms and resting the baby sweetly against his chest. “Oh my,” Steve sniffled, gently readjusting the baby securely in his arms. “She’s beautiful!” He smiled, tears in his eyes. You sat for a while just staring at the baby, your mother had just left to get you some food for you, and Allison went to go get your father, Andreas, and Cassie.

“The others want to meet her before the crazy starts,” a tear runs down his nose and falls on your daughters soft blanket. “But I don’t wanna go!” He chuckles and you rest your head on his shoulder, rubbing soothing, wide, circles on his back.

“We have the rest of our lives together baby!” You exclaimed brightly, heart breaking for Steven and the others a bit. “You’ll get to hold her again!“ You smiled nodding encouragingly, and Steven nodded, handing the baby back to you so one of the others could front. It took him a second, your hand holding his head to your shoulder while he struggled to swap places. It was almost as if they were arguing on who should go first. Eventually, Marc fronted.

“Oh man,” he gasped, looking down at her with watery eyes, “She’s here! She’s perfect!” He chuckled leaning into you excitedly giving you a sweet kiss. “You are amazing! I’m so proud of you!” He grinned staring down at your perfect baby girl.

“You wanna hold her baby?” You smiled, offering him the bundle of blankets. He grinned and nodded holding his arms out like an over eager child on Christmas. You handed him the baby, and you could see his world change.

“Oh man, how could anyone ever- she’s so- oh I love her!” He chuckled nuzzling her head and leaving a short kiss on her face. “This is the best day of my life!” He laughed, snuggling his girls closer.

You chuckled and snuggled in closer to your two favorite people. You weren’t able to sit with them long though, they needed to get you cleaned up as well as the baby. Marc followed after your daughter, and Juno helped take care of getting you cleaned up.

“You know, you really did pick well for your partner.” She smiled, helping you get into another hospital gown that she brought. “I am truly impressed with how present each and every one of your boys has been with you during all of this.”

You sighed dreamily and sat back down on the bed to wait for your baby and your husband to make their reappearance. “Yeah, I’m a lucky woman.” You. Giggled, resting your head on her shoulder while you sat with the goddess. You had a very warm and familial relationship to Juno that wasn’t displayed by other gods, but as a goddess who doesn’t get the luxury of having demigod children, she enjoys sticking close to her favorite avatars.

Marc came back into the room with the baby and two nurses in toe, they were carrying the birth certificate for you to sign, and a very lengthy bit of paperwork on vaccinations and releases. While you signed your half of everything, Marc continued to stare contentedly at your baby, really enjoying the moment. When you finished he handed you your little girl back, and your world felt complete.

“I called him while they were doing her Apgar stuff.” He said, casually clutching your daughter’s tiny hand.

“What?” You gasped, wide eyed. “Oh Marc that’s- I’m really proud of you!” You whispered, clutching his hand with your free one.

“Yeah it was-“ he sighed and sat staring into nothing thoughtfully, “It was hard, but I think I should give him a chance you know? We were all struggling, it doesn’t excuse that he- but I honestly think he deserves a chance.”

“Yeah?” You nodded rubbing his back. “I support whatever decision you make baby, I’m proud of you.”

“Yeah, I better let Jake meet our daughter now huh?” He smiled warily, and you beamed at him.

“Yeah hon, get some rest. I’m sure Jake is excited.” You nodded and held his head as he tensed, gently scratching his scalp until Jake was roused.

“Hola, Mi vida!” You grinned, tucking your baby’s blanket more securely under her chin. “Wanna meet your daughter?”

Jake grinned brightly and you could have sworn he almost squealed with delight. He reached out gently, and brought the tiny baby into his arms. He looked so big in comparison to this tiny little girl, he was mesmerized by her little cheeks and little fingers. She was more than perfect, she was absolutely radiant. “¡Mi amor, me has dado el mundo! ¿Cómo puedo pagarte?” He laughed breathlessly, clutching you both closer to his chest.

“You repay me every day, just by being here!” You whisper, kissing him on the cheek. “Isn’t she pretty?”

“Pretty ni siquiera empieza a cubrirlo, ¡es la cosa más hermosa del mundo!” He laughs, cooing as the baby begins to fuss. Then the most adorable thing in the world happens. Jake begins to rock her and sings softly in Spanish to her, and you could have sworn she grinned. Your heart melted, and you could see tears in the corners of his eyes, though he will vehemently deny it. You sighed happily and curled up in Jake’s arms, sleeping while you had the opportunity, knowing your little family was safe.

Jake took this moment to cry. He could feel such a foreign set of emotions well up in his chest, safety, comfort, contentment, love. He felt like he was holding the world in his hands. You were sleeping and so was your little girl, your little girl. God, Jake couldn’t get enough of that phrase. His little girl, his! Both of his girls were so comfortable in his arms, and he couldn’t believe it. His arms, the same arms that have fought bloody battles, waged wars. His arms were where you found comfort. If he died now he would be completely content. Several nurses had come in and out of the room to check on them, and he could tell that they thought their little family was adorable, but some of them were giving him looks as if he might combust at any moment, and of course, he’s a scary guy, but he couldn’t help but wonder if they were looking at him differently for his… condition. He knew that it lived in his medical record, he got kicked out of the military for it after all, but he guessed it didn’t matter, his girls felt safe with him, his family, your family, felt safe with them, so it must not matter. He was content, his family was safe, that’s all that matters. His alters were staring down at the perfect bundle of pink from various reflections, and he turned to speak with them.

“Wow, we’re the luckiest blokes in the world, huh?” Steven grinned from the reflection in one of the monitors closest to him. He looked happy, it made Jake smile.

“Yeah Steven, we are.” Marc grinned looking contemplative and sullen but still happy. He was staring from the reflection in your phone that was propped on one of those giant plastic hospital water cups with the straw.

“What’s wrong, Amigo?” Jake muttered under his breath, shifting to make you and the baby more comfortable where you were resting on his chest. “You can talk to us.”

“Go on mate, clue us in yeah?” Steven said, shifting his vision to Marc.

“I- I called Dad.” He sighed, rubbing the heels of his palms into his eye sockets. Steven and Jake both looked at Marc, completely bewildered. Steven was shocked that he would even want to talk to his dad, Jake was shocked that he wasn’t the one to have to make the first move. “I know, crazy. But I wanted him to see, wanted him to see we’re happy, you know?”

“¿Le mostraste al bebé?” Jake muttered, making eye contact with his alter, and subconsciously squeezing you all a little tighter.

“Yeah, I sent him some pictures. He said she’s beautiful, said she looks like-“ he stoped and Jake could tell he wanted to cry.

“Hermano, we don’t have to talk to him.” He shakes his head. “I know he loves her still, she was his wife after all, but if you don’t want to talk about it, you reserve the right to cut him off.” Huffed Jake, annoyed.

“I know, but he honestly apologized immediately after he said it. I think he’s starting to understand that we feel differently about all of this.” Marc sighs.

“I-“ Steven began. “I know that my opinions on all of this is… warped. But I think that we should give him a chance, but if he makes us or the baby or our wife uncomfortable, we reserve the right to kick him out.” He shrugs, “But I for one think it would be nice to have our dad again.”

They all sat in contemplation with this, watching the two most important people in their life doze. “Let’s- Let’s talk about it later.” Jake sighed as he heard your family coming to the room.

“Shh!” He raised a finger to his lips with a grin, as he saw a nurse escorting your sister and her family and your parents into the room. “¿Qué pasa, chicos? ¿Queréis conocer al bebé?” He grinned, rousing you from your sleep with a gentle shake.

“Oh man, you’re a great pillow.” You grumbled, placing a kiss right over his heart. Jake couldn’t have been more in love with you in that moment if he tried. He saw you and Cassie look at each other and squeal shaking your fists, as she ran up to the bed side and ever so cautiously crawled up next to you in bed, pressing your heads right up close to each other as you both peered down at the baby. Jake watched as your sister snapped a picture of you all together, and grinned. It felt good to have a family who wanted to capture all of these moments for him. Made him feel like he truly belonged, which every single person in the room would say that he did.

He grinned as he watched them all holding his baby girl with such care, he couldn’t believe that he would ever feel so safe in a room this full of happy people, but he did. It felt like a miracle.

The family all took their turns holding Aurora, Cassie of course got to go first. She squished between you and Jake on the hospital bed and he carefully transferred the tiny baby into her waiting arms. Cassie smiled and began to cry a bit and when all of Jake’s girls smiled so happily and held each other so gently, well, he couldn’t help but to cry a bit too. Allison took so many pictures, and eventually her husband took the phone so she could swap Jake places to stare down at the baby for herself. Jake did you a favor and took several beautiful photos of all of the women in your family crowding around you and the baby while the men grinned and took photos for their respective wives and well, girlfriend. Though, Steven calling you his wife by accident earlier made him think.

“¿Cómo estás, hermano? ¿Estás bien ahí dentro?” Andreas said taping him playfully on the forehead as he slung an arm around his shoulders. Jake tensed at first, but quickly made himself relax a bit. While startling, Jake wanted this brotherly affection.

“¿Quién soy yo? Oh I’m on top of the world!” He chuckled, patting his brother in laws shoulder in turn.

“It’s okay to be nervous Beta,” his father in law chuckled to his left. He could feel his hand on his back and he smiled at his shoes. “I know I was, two girls? And twins at that? Man I was terrified!“ your dad chuckled and he and Andreas chuckled with him. “I’ll tell you what though, the women in this family are magical. Something about them makes you wanna wrap em up and keep ‘em forever!” He laughed. “You’re gonna do great. All three of you, I hope you can hear me in there.”

Jake smiled and nodded. “They can, they feel as grateful as I am. We’re thrilled to have a good role model.” They broke it up when another click could be heard in the room, and they looked to see all three of the grown women holding up phones to capture this moment. “Romperlo, señoras. Enough pictures, you’ll ruin our street cred!” They all laughed at that and your family continued to pass the baby around. Jake quietly let Marc take back over when he saw him receive a text.

‘Son, I know we aren’t exactly on the best of terms, but I’m in the neighborhood, and I was wondering if I could stop by? - Dad’

Marc felt his muscles tense, and his head shot up to watch as your family contentedly continued to watch you feed the baby, your sister feeding you bites of whatever your mom brought for you to eat, while they had a hushed conversation about what she needed to pick up from the store, and where your parents would be staying. He smiled, and he looked back down at the text, feeling the cold chill tingle back up his spine.

“¿Estás bien, amigo?” Your sister said plopping down next to him on the pull out couch.

“Ye-yeah?” Marc muttered. Not exactly knowing how to respond.

“Oh, Marc, it’s you. What’s wrong man?” She said patting his back.

“Nothing it’s-“ he sighed and looked up into your sister’s eyes. He knew that Andreas struggled with his side of the family for a while when he chose to marry and move to the states, but this seemed like too much to put on your sister. “Hey!” He groused as your sister snatched his phone and proceeded to read the text from his dad. She was a brash one, your sister. Not afraid to take charge of a situation.

Her eyes widened as he read the text and her mouth formed a perfect ‘o’ “Oh man, Marc.” She sighed handing him the phone back. “Listen, if you were gonna ask for my opinion, which you weren’t, but I’ll give it to you anyway, if it disturbs your peace, it’s not worth it. I know that you want to make amends, but if it’s gonna wreck your mental health for the next seven to ten business days, let it go.” Marc considered this, and nodded uneasily, then as if sensing his discomfort, she spoke again. “But, then again, if this could be the beginning of a new chapter in the relationship you have with your father, go for it.” She shrugged, “Set boundaries, go at your pace, don’t be afraid to say no. Whatever the decision Marc, you are going to have to be the one to make it for your family. We will be here to back you, no matter what.” She winked and got up to go help you again, and he smiled softly, watching your family, HIS family, and picturing his father among them, and he decided maybe that picture would be nice.

‘Ok, why don’t you stop by before it gets too late. -Marc’

Your family as if by telepathy made themselves scarce within minutes of him sending the text, explaining that they would be back in a bit with another set of clothing for him, as well as the stuff you forgot to bring. Each woman in the family kissed him on the cheek in turn, and he smiled shakily at your sister as she bearded them out the door.

‘You got this!’ She mouthed with a big thumbs up, and he turned to you, fidgeting with his hands.

“You don’t have to worry, Allison already told me.” She smiled, “I think it’s a good idea inviting him here, in a controlled environment. We’re not inviting him into your safe space, we’re not going to his house. It’s a neutral territory. Easier.” You shrugged wrapping him in your arms, while your baby dosed quietly with you standing over top of her looking down.

“Yeah, easier.” Marc sighed, rubbing a hand down his face with a groan. “I hope you’re right.”

“When have I ever been wrong?” You laughed, plopping down next to him on your bed. “Now, come here and kiss me while the kid is sleeping, we got an hour before she’s hungry again, and I want to spend it loving on you!”

Marc grinned and devoured your mouth with a smile, caressing your curves and cradling your head. “God, what did I ever do to deserve you?” He grinned, then there was a knock. He paled, and you hushed him, smoothing a hand over his face with a smile. You both looked to see Marc’s father in the doorway, and you straightened yourself out, feeling a bit like horny teenagers.

“Hello!” You grinned taking the initiative, and waddling over to your father in law with a grin. “You must be Elias, nice to meet you.” You said shaking his hand. Marc placed himself between the cradle and the door where you stood, fidgeting with his fingers. He slowly walked up and put a hand around your waist and looked up to greet his dad.

“Hey, dad.” He nodded, waving awkwardly. The baby started fussing and you chuckled clicking your tongue. They just stood there staring at each other as you went to feed Aurora.

You were startled by how similar they looked, the hair, the nose, the stature. It was all very similar. You also couldn’t help but notice that Elias had the body language of Steven, it was shocking just how similar they looked. It was starting to get awkward as you sat feeding the baby, and you sighed when Juno walked in carrying a stack of something. “Why don’t you two go on a walk hmm?” you smiled, “I’ll finish feeding her, and you can come back and hold her.”

Elias, who still hadn’t said a word, nodded and ushered his son from the room. They walked side by side down the halls, waiting a considerable amount of time before either decided to speak. Elias took the initiative there.

“She’s uh,” he shook his head and motioned back toward the room with his hand. “She’s beautiful Marc! Quite the woman.”

He smiled, “You look very happy together.”

“Uh yeah,” Marc shrugged, “We are, we all are.” There it was. Out in the open. That simple use of ‘we’ was a powerful one. It thickened the air with crackling tension, as if any moment, lightning would strike and scatter their atoms to dust.

“Yeah, I’m-“ Elias sighed, rubbing his chin. “I’m glad to hear it. How are your uh, how’s your.” He gestured vaguely at his temple and tried to meet Marc’s gaze.

“ They’re fine, Steven is uh- Steven is now a tour guide at the museum?” His mouth was dry, tongue almost too heavy in his mouth, like he swallowed a million bees. “Jake is a cab driver, and I’m still. I’m still me.” He sighed. Elias nodded, and Marc took it as a good sign. “Yeah, uh. We, we’re getting help, talking to someone you know? It’s hard to parse everything out, but we make it work and she’s- God my wife is great!” He laughed with a shrug. “She’s the only thing keeping us all together.” He nodded tearfully.

“That’s good son, I’m happy for you.” He smiles, “Will you be ok? You know? With the baby and all? I guess it’s- I don’t know, I try reading and learning but everyone makes it seem like you’re- and I know your not, and then there’s your mo-“

“Honestly? I don’t want to talk about it.” Marc laughed bitterly. “I really don’t. We’re not dangerous, my alters and I all love the baby equally, we all want to be there for her, we all want to be good fathers. Clearly, having DID or not doesn’t determine wether or not I’ll be a good parent. It makes it harder, sure. We have a good partner though. She’s a great mom.” He nods settling his dad with a hard look. “I’m not ready to talk to you about- everything. Randall or-“ he paused and took a shaky breath. “Or mom. But, I want you to meet your granddaughter, I want to try again.”

Elias stood there for a moment in stunned silence, looking his son up and down. “Ok.”

He said simply, nodding slightly and patting Marc on the back. “I can do that. We can go at your pace. I want to meet them, Steven and Jake, I want to meet your wife or girlfriend? Are you married? Doesn’t matter, I want to hold your baby. I want to make up for lost time.”

Marc stood stunned and staring at his father, and he felt a weight fall off his shoulders. He never thought a conversation like this would be possible. He never thought all he had to do was set boundaries. He was more likely to believe he had to fight some weird dragon first or something. Your sister was right, boundaries were a good thing, and it made all of this easier, but he was exhausted, so he gripped his dad in a hug, and used it as excuse to let Steven front again. When he pulled back, Steven was startled to see his father. “Oh em, hello!” He waved and hunched back over with a small smile. Elias watched as his son’s posture became smaller, as if he was attempting to take up less space. He heard the accent and was startled, but he kept his composure with a smile. He was going to do this the right way, for his boy. “Dad! It’s really, it’s amazing to see you!” He chuckled awkary, scratching his head.

“Hello Steven. It’s nice to see you too, we should get back to your wife, yes?” He nodded putting a hand to his son’s back. He nodded, and Steven led him back to your room with a grin.

Steven was happy to see your family was back, filling the space with their noise and comfort. You seemed to be eating and the baby was tucked in her bassinet snoozing away. His father though, seemed a bit overwhelmed. “Um everyone? This is my Dad.”

He smiled, gesturing towards Elias with a smile. Elias waved and came further into the room. The room fell a bit quiet, and he heard the baby fuss. “Oh,” Steven cooed and went to pick her up gently. “Already used to the constant noise huh squirt? That’s good. Your mum’s family is a bit rowdy.” He chuckled as slowly, everyone introduced themselves after chuckling at his joke.

“Bring her over lovie!” You smiled, sat next to his father on your bed. You gestured for him to hand the baby to his dad, and he gently handed her over while you helped him to adjust to holding her head. “Isn’t she so pretty? I’m glad she got your brown eyes.” You mumbled absent mindedly, curling into his fathers back to look at the baby over his shoulder, reaching to pull her tiny hat back down over her head while his dad grinned down at her, muttering prayers and blessings in quiet Hebrew, telling you what he was like as a baby, and patting your hand fondly. Steven stepped back and took in the happy scene and his world, really, truly felt complete. Full to the brim of things he thought he couldn’t have.

You all settled into easy conversation until visiting hours came to a close. Steven had at some point been swamped again for Jake so he could speak to Elias, and the night went on without a hitch. By the time the nurse came to kick them out, Elias was playing a card game with your father, Allison and Andreas were speaking quietly with your mother about possible siblings for Cassie, and you, Jake, the baby, and Cassie were all curled up in your bed. Cassie was at the laying on your right, tucked into your side and snoozing clutching her bear, who’s matching twin bear was tucked in the empty cradle while Aurora was being held, you were curled into Jake who was on your left with a flat cap resting over his eyes, possibly sleeping, possibly ‘just resting Los viejos ojos’, and the baby was resting gently on your legs where they were bent at the knee. “Are you happy Querida?” Jake muttered with a grin, rubbing your arm.

“Of course my love!” You beamed, cuddling closer to him as you gestured to the bed. “I got my sun, moon, and stars laying here with me, how could I not be?” He chuckled and muttered about how cheesy that was, but gave you a sweet kiss anyway. The nurse told them all that visiting hours had ended, and they could all come back tomorrow. Each person took their turn saying goodbye with a hug and a kiss or a squeeze and a pat on the shoulder. Cassie whined a bit when she had to leave but otherwise they were fine. Then you were left to your own devices. You tucked the baby into her cradle, making sure to wrap her up snuggly in her blankets. Once it was all said and done, you all settled in to sleep, feeling perfectly content.

Konshu had been careful to keep his presence light in this affair, but he finally appeared again in your room while you slept. He peered down at the sleeping child, and rested his fingertips on her forehead, muttering a blessing under his breath. He stared and stared, keeping careful guard over his Avatar’s most valuable treasure yet, when he felt the presence of another divine being.

“Welcome, Juno.” He muttered, not bothering to look away from the baby.

“Hello old friend,” she sighed, wrapping an arm around one oh his and looking down at the baby herself. “How are they?” She nodded at the bed where their patrons lay.

“They will sleep peacefully, I saw to that.” He nodded, sparing a glance at them and turning his head back to the baby.

“Do they know?” Juno whispered, looking back to the baby and her friend as they both watched over their avatars.

“No, I’ll keep it that way as well,” Konshu sighed wearily, leaning into his staff with the weight of the world on his shoulders. “If it’s the smallest favor I give them, I have a strange and terrible feeling it still will never be enough.”

“Ah, so you’ve grown attached then?” Juno chuckles, touching the now slightly fussing baby with a finger, and soothing her before it disturbed the parents.

“To the worm? No.” Konshu scoffed, but Juno saw right through him. She glanced at the sleeping couple and grinned, “I simply pleaded with Taweret to let the child live in the face of certain doom and let her be strong. I’ll need a new avatar eventually!” He grumbled.

“Oh you silly old bird,” Juno laughed. “You can admit you like them, I won’t tell. I mean, you don’t go and plead to another goddess for the life of one child for nothing!” She winked and Konshu shook his head.

“I’ll admit to no such thing.” He huffed. But he still stood with Juno, watching as the soft, squishy, Human breathed in her cradle. Her spirit was strong to be certain. She was a fighter already, he could tell. She sighed, and a foreign sense of fierce loyalty came over the old god. He looked and looked and kept looking even after Juno had long sense left. He watched as you and his Moonknight took care of the child, not really making his presence known, but keeping an eye out anyway. Making sure nobody was coming for them while they were sedentary. It was strange, he had never seen all facets of his Avatar content before, but he liked it. He valued this aspect of his avatar, it restored a part of him that Konshu valued most about them, their humanity. Seeing him so vulnerable, and overjoyed, and downright hopeful. It reminded him why he chose them in the first place. Their compassion, their bravery. He valued that, even more, he valued this tiny baby, and the baby’s mother who made them all so happy. He liked this family, liked their strength. Maybe Juno was right, maybe he was fond of them after all. Only one way to find out, stay with them as long as he can. And so, he did.

[peterparkerincorrectquotes]

hc, the avengers/starks at pride?

•  It’s probably Peter who suggests all the Avengers go to pride, and as soon as he brings it up to Tony, Tony definitely becomes a starry-eyed, excited father at the prospect. Like, he probably wishes his father was more supportive in anything he did, so having Peter open up to him about an event he’s really excited about would make his paternal instincts THRIVE.

Peter, shyly approaching Tony: So, you know how it’s June?

Tony: Yeah...?

Peter: And, um, June is pride month.

Tony: Mhm...

Peter: I was wondering, if, umm, maybe we could all, ya know, go to some pride events together—

Tony, immediately lighting up: YES OF COURSE, DO YOU WANT ME TO BUY YOU MERCH? WHAT BUSINESSES SHOULD I SUPPORT?? DO YOU WANT ME TO DESIGN YOU A SPECIAL PRIDE SPIDERMAN SUIT???

Peter, tearing up: Yes, please, Mr. Stark...

•  EVERYONE gets a special pride themed suit. They all get different flags to inspire their suits, too! They’re not all rainbow! Bi, pan, lesbian, trans, ace, any color scheme they can think of, they get! 

•  Tony goes ALL OUT with the suits. I mean turn-his-blasters-into-confetti-cannons level of extra, here. He helps Peter make his web shooters fire pride colored webs. Steve gets a cape that’s a pride flag. It doesn’t do anything special, but it looks tacky, so Tony puts it on the suit anyway. Just to piss Steve off. I mean, what’s he gonna do?? Take it off and disappoint Peter?? AS IF. 

•  And pride becomes a mandatory event for ALL the Avengers. There will be no, “But I’m cis and heterosexual—” Tony WILL throw hands. You are supporting his spiderson; you don’t get a say. Not that it’s much of a problem because anyone who sees how thrilled Peter gets at the support couldn’t possibly turn him down in good conscience. And I mean ANYONE. Nick Fury couldn’t withstand those puppy eyes.

Fury: Look, I’m sorry, Stark. I have an important meeting that day. I support all of you, but I—

Peter, spotting Tony and Fury: Oh, Director Fury!! Mr. Stark told me you were gonna come, too!! I was so surprised!! But thank you so, so much; it means so much to me that even the highest members of our little team support me :) !! I’m used to higher-ups hating people being open about LGBT+ stuff, is all.

Fury: Ah...

Peter: Yeah, like at school they don’t let us talk about stuff like that. Apparently the existence of LGBT+ people is too “controversial.” It’s really dehumanizing. I’m so glad it’s not like that here though!! I’m happy the Avengers can be a safe space!!

Fury, sweating: Ahah...

Peter: Anyway, I’m gonna go work on my rainbow web shooters!! Bye!! Thanks again!

Fury: ...I’ll cancel that meeting.

Tony: Yeah, that’s what I thought.

•  Tony’s support would be so over the top it might border on overbearing. Like, when a parent is SUPER supportive, to the point that anytime they see ANYTHING rainbow in a store (pride related or not), they buy it. And then, like, they give it to you with that >:3 look on their face. “Ah?? AH??? DO YOU LIKE IT??? GET IT???? ‘CUZ IT’S RAINBOW?????” That’s definitely Tony. Once again, he’s compensating for not getting the same support from his own father figure. 

•  Also, Tony would totally pull strings to get prominent LGBT+ singers to perform at pride. Like, all of Peter’s faves. He would never admit to being the one to convince them, though.

•  And, obviously, the Avengers would make sure no assholes hurt people at pride. They see a Trump flag in the distance and all of the Avengers just

•  No one tries to pull ANY shit that June.

[thevindicativevordan]

What do you think of Kamala Khan?

First legacy hero since the Silver Age to arguably outshine her namesake.

Her time as Ms. Marvel has certainly won more acclaim and attracted more attention than Carol's, and she was a much bigger success to boot. Unlike Danvers' Captain Marvel book, which required multiple relaunches in order to keep sales above cancellation levels, Kamala was a hit right off the bat. You could even argue she was the first organic success for the diversity initiative as she was not relying on the brand power of a popular character the way Miles was with Spider-Man. Unfortunately her sales performances has not outlasted her creator's time writing her. Since Wilson left, Kamala has yet to reach her original heights.

I have my theories on why that is. Some blame falls on Marvel for turning newcomers away thanks to their mandatory event tie-ins derailing Kamala's book. Another cause may be that Kamala was the perfect entry point character for new comic fans who were seeking an "in" to 616 after being hooked by the MCU. Kamala was the right character for them, like her real world fans Kamala was a superhero fangirl, she obsessed over the Avengers just like they did. That made her relatable to them in the same way that so many readers latched on to Peter Parker as a character struggling to make ends meet. Those newcomers however may have left after Marvel drove them away, they got older and didn't find Kamala as endearing anymore, or having become pros at navigating the currents of Marvel publishing and continuity, they no longer needed an entry level character and "graduated" to the A-Listers.

Won't be long before her comic incarnation becomes a mutant to synergize with her MCU counterpart, and that opens up it's own set of opportunities and challenges. Kamala will go from being the most/second-most prominent Inhuman to yet another young mutant fighting for attention while Wolverine, Cyclops, and the same handful of mutants that have always been the headliners continue to do so. On the other hand the X-Men are hot right now, while the Inhumans are a failed/dead franchise, and Kamala becoming a mutant could allow her to once again be that "entry" character for what is the most convoluted franchise to ever be published. Whole bunch of MCU casuals are likely going to want to get into 616 X-Men again, and Kamala could serve as their guide to understanding all the time travel/alternate dimensions/sex cult activities/soap opera which defines that franchise.

Rooting for her going forward, at her core she's just a sweet kid who is also a huge nerd. Given how many Marvel "heroes" are assholes, I find her optimism and idealism refreshing. Hopefully Marvel never takes that away from her.

[twistedtummies2]

The Devils I Know - Number 7

Welcome to “The Devils I Know!” For this spooky time of year, from now till Halloween, I’ll be counting down My Top 31 Depictions of the Devil, from movies, television, video games, and more! And SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE FRIEND! Number 7 is…Al Pacino, from The Devil’s Advocate.

Several years before facing Peter Stormare’s Lucifer in “Constantine,” Keanu Reeves had to challenge the Prince of Darkness in the 1997 crime/horror combo “The Devil’s Advocate.” In the film, Reeves plays Kevin Lomax, an up-and-coming lawyer working in Florida. Lomax is not necessarily an evil man, but he is a highly ambitious one, and is both dedicated and skilled when it comes to his job: even when defending a client he realizes is guilty, Lomax is still able to find a way to gain an acquittal from the jury. He’s a man who refuses to lose a case, no matter what. Indeed, his incredible ability to help his clients gets him the attention of a prominent law firm in New York City. Kevin accepts their job offer and moves to New York with his wife, Mary Ann (played by future Evil Queen and Morticia, Charlize Theron), expecting big things from this change in his life…and he certainly gets them, thought not at all the way he expects. The head of the firm is Al Pacino’s character, who goes by the name of “John Milton.” (A reference to the writer of “Paradise Lost.”) At first, Lomax and Milton get on swimmingly, but over time, as Kevin’s life begins to fall apart – his wife going insane, his career taking nightmarish directions – he begins to realize more and more that Milton is not all he seems. It’s ultimately revealed that Milton is not only Kevin’s long-lost father…but, more importantly, that Milton is the Devil himself. Milton’s whole scheme is to force Kevin into a position where he will willingly become the father of the Antichrist, so that Milton can – of course – take over the world. While Pacino was always the first choice to play the Devil in this movie, the creators didn’t secure his performance right away. Apparently, Pacino initially felt the role of Milton was too one-note, and rejected earlier versions of the script no less than three times. He did recommend other actors who might be able to take the part – apparently, both Sean Connery and Robert Redford, of all people, were considered for the role, per Pacino’s suggestion – but these performers ended up being either unavailable or simply unwilling to tackle the character. Finally, on the fourth proposal - and with some changes made to the script by that point – Pacino accepted the part. Thank goodness (or badness, I guess, in this case), because it’s hard to imagine anyone but ol’ Scarface here doing such a great job with the portrayal of the Devil in the film. Pacino’s Devil is a wonderfully fun villain; he’s somehow a character who hides nothing and yet remains an eternal enigma. Much like Jack Nicholson’s Daryl Van Horne, there’s a mixture of coarseness and dignity to this take on the concept. Pacino swaggers through the role, and carries himself with…basically the exact kind of attitude you’d EXPECT Pacino as the Devil to have: he's somewhere between a gangster and a sleazy snake oil salesman. It’s Pacino at his most…Pacino-y, but he also has a strength and sense of uneasy menace to him that gives him the power and believability a part like this requires. He speaks so sensibly and makes many good and interesting points, yet at the same time he never hides the fact that…well…he is who and what he is. To me, when I think of the Devil, this is one of the first versions I think of, and it’s easily in my Top 3 of Pacino’s performances (my favorite is Michael Corleone, my second favorite is Tony Montana). All in all, an easy choice for high placement on this countdown. Also…Keanu, you should probably stop ticking off the Devil. It, uh…doesn’t seem to go well for you, whenever it happens. Plus, now you have both Michael and Dracula mad at you, so…(pauses)…oh, who am I kidding, he’s John Wick. He can take care of himself. :P Tomorrow, the countdown continues with Number 6! HINT: One…Two…Three Strikes, You’re Out!

[angelicamerlinbarnes]

Severus Snape being an awesome teacher and human being

Au Volant - Elsa & Emilie

He makes sure to let students work on their own when they brew Amortentia. They only have to pass in a list of things they smell and he draws little smiley faces on them because he knows a lot of kids are very insecure about their feelings. (Once a kid passed in a list that just said, I’m sorry Professor but it doesn’t smell like anything, and on their paper Severus drew an ace and aro flag and a time for the student to be at Mcgonogall’s office that weekend for tea, along with a smiley face and an O grade.) (The student was Newt.) (Hailee’s just read, People are gross and if I fall in love with one I want you to kill me, to which Severus responded, Valid, and drew her a picture of a turtle.)

He makes fake batches of Felix Felicis and gives one to every student secretly before their O.W.L.s and N.E.W.T.s so they feel extra confident going into the test but aren’t actually cheating.

He knows his area is Potions, but he teaches defense spells to students who come after class or report bullying anonymously. Severus Snape does not fucking stand for bullying in his classroom or outside of it. If you dare to pick on one of his students, he will burn you so hard with his mere words that you will wish you were dead. Do not fuck with Severus Snape’s kids.

On parent-teacher day, he drinks different batches of Polyjuice Potion to imitate certain students, all of whom hide away in their dorms after drinking a fine batch of invisibility potion. He then follows these select parents around and endures their horrifying, demeaning remarks about their “failure of a child” so his students don’t have to. He makes sure to give these students glowing praises to their parents when it’s his turn to offer feedback (after making up an excuse to go to the bathroom as the student), and takes mental notes of the parents’ most prominent criticisms so he can be sure to compliment those parts of his students during their next assignments (and also just because).

He brews sleeping potions for students he knows stay up all night studying and sometimes slips it into their drinks if they refuse to take it willingly. He then gives them back their (usually almost flawless) tests with the note that if they want a full O they need to sleep more.

He invites kids he knows don’t have many friends to have dinner and lunch and breakfast in his classroom whenever they’d like. He tries to make friends with some of them too, hoping to make their lives a little less lonely than his was.

He keeps an eye out for abusive home situations. He does his best to come up with excuses for those unfortunate students to stay at Hogwarts over breaks or to visit often over the summer. He tries to find them friends that will help them the way James helped Sirius and Regulus, and speaks to Mcgonogall about opening a home for these kids on campus. He does his best to be the parent he knows these kids don’t have, and is open about his own horrid past in hopes of getting some of them to fess up so he can help them better than he can without hearing it explicitly from their mouths.

He uses his Pensieve to collect happy memories of and for his students to reflect on when they need to and they sit in the corner of his classroom. (Among them are his wedding day to James and Lily, the day Harry was born, a couple playdates with the other Marauder children, Sirius and Remus’ wedding day, studying with Remus, pranking James with Sirius, Sirius and James asleep cuddled together with Remus on the couch in ugly Christmas sweaters, his son and many nieces and nephews playing dress-up, reading with Hermione and exploring with Luna and Newt, dancing with Draco (he likes to dance but was always ashamed to do it at the Malfoys), going on long drives with Regulus, the Blacks’ funeral (Regulus and Sirius performed a very gay stripper dance on top of their graves, it was beautiful), and many, many more.) Sometimes he can see his saddest students watching them and smiling, and their sad eyes twinkling make him smile.

He brings in a box of small kittens, puppies, and bunnies one day and lets them wander around the classroom. Some kids start crying because they haven’t felt this loved in years. After an incident with a bad potion and a rainbow puppy, he stops bringing them all out during class, but they’re there on the weekends and whenever a student needs to hug one (or borrow one, much to Mcgonogall’s chagrin).

He works to break down House biases and help students develop inter-House relationships and friendships. He wants every student to be proud of their House and not to treat anyone differently because of theirs. He creates (with Dumbledore, Sirius, and Regulus’ help) an annual House Pride, in which every student dresses up in their House colors and has their nails and skin painted and everyone is smiling and laughing and waving flags with their House emblems in the air. Even the teachers get in on it.

He stresses the importance of friendships, communication, and choices. He urges students not to make his mistakes by treating their friends well, talking about their feelings even if they’re ugly, and making the right choices in life for you and your loved ones, even if those choices are hard. He invites Lily in to talk about this too sometimes.

He sends out his Patronus every night to wander around the school. Often it comes back to him with nothing, but sometimes he can hear a student crying through it. He’ll instruct his doe to sit with the student until he gets there, and then he’ll walk around the castle, pretending to “accidentally” happen upon the crying student. He’ll sit with them until they’ve calmed down and listen if they want to talk and then take them to their dorm, bidding them goodnight and get well soon.

He gives students hugs when they want them. He didn’t want to originally, but Harry would greet him every class with a hug, and then one day Draco came in crying and attached himself to Severus like a sloth, so he patted him on the back and continued to hug him. Not long after, Hermione couldn’t figure out a potion and burst into tears out of frustration, turning and burying herself in his chest. After Luna wrapped her stick arms around his neck for no reason, Severus just accepted his fate and let his students hug him.

A lot of first years get scared in the hallways, since the staircases move and everywhere is incredibly crowded and they are oh so very small. Severus will often hold the hand of the most anxious ones for the first few weeks and walk them to class. Eventually they become more confident with the castle and themselves and stop needing it, but the occasional sixth year will slip their hand into his just because sometimes.

He walks around campus with students sometimes. He can tell when they’re nervous or sad or angry and he takes them on walks around the outskirts of campus and lets them vent. He also teaches them how to throw curses at the Whomping Willow just because (it’s for Remus but nobody’s gonna say it out loud).

He teaches students how to walk dramatically (as he should). He puts on student drag shows in the Great Hall with James’ help (who always kisses him way too enthusiastically because of it) and Dumbledore’s permission (so long as he gets to be the finale). The students work with Sirius on their drag looks and Sirius and Remus both join in the drag show for the opening act. Sirius’ job is to design and create the students’ looks while Remus tells them they look pretty and tames their stage fright. Severus just sits in the audience smirking while Lily screams in delight. (Regulus also shrieks with excitement eventually, though he does usually spend the first half trying to look disinterested.) (Peter’s job is to get the cookies and sweets (and underage alcohol).)

He turns into his snake Animagus form sometimes without warning when his students aren’t looking and just slithers around the classroom scaring the crap out of people. His favorite students are the ones brave enough to pet him. Harry and Newt are the only ones brave enough (and allowed) to wind him around their shoulders. Severus and Harry sometimes have conversations in Parseltongue.

He invents spells to help with dyslexia and other learning disabilities in his spare time. When he’s done with that he plans to try looking into some cures to mental illness. He’s thinking possibly a potion that treats PTSD by replacing traumatic memories with pictures of puppies, unicorns, bunnies, cats, and parrots. What do you think?

He tries hard to come up with solutions and modifications to his lessons for students with ADHD. He often talks to James about what the best steps to take are because James has ADHD. (So does Sirius, but his insecurities are bad enough that he won’t talk about it with anyone but Remus and James.)

He plays the violin sometimes during tests and uses Sonorus to make it echo throughout the classroom. Occasionally he cancels class and just plays until most of his students fall asleep. Those who want to work on extra work can, but he tries to keep their stress and general teenage angst to a minimum. (Though he encourages the emo phase.)

One of the first things he does after the Prank is get to work on a lycanthropy solution for Remus. After a couple years he invents the wolfsbane potion, but it doesn’t quite do the trick. Eventually he manages to figure out the cure, and when Remus finds out he cries so hard he can’t breathe right for days. (Sirius also cries. So does James. And Peter. And Lily and Regulus and Mcgonogall. Seriously, everyone cried and everyone hugged him and Severus tried to get away by transforming into his snake form but toddler Harry just grabbed him and refused to let go, so that didn’t work.) (He also helps Remus become a wolf Animagus when he asks almost a year later.)

He teaches certain kids Occlumency and Legilimency after school. It’s strictly for kids he knows come from abusive homes, whether they’re open about it or not, so they can tell when it’s going to be a bad night and get away or protect themselves. He teaches Occlumency for those who need to hide things from their parents (like Sirius and Regulus used to) and Legilimency to all, just in case. He focuses on stealth and untraceable versions of the craft to earn the kids as much time and protection as he can.

He figures out how to remove the Dark Mark from his own arm after the war. The next person he calls is Regulus, whose he also removes. He writes down the entire process and when the war starts up again, he keeps an eye out for students suddenly wearing long sleeves. He speaks with those he does find and helps them to make the right choice and join the right side of the war, starting with removing that horrid tattoo. (Draco bawls uncontrollably when Severus removes his.)

When they do the lesson on Veritaserum, he’s extra careful to make sure students don’t test it, especially on themselves or their friends. It, along with Amortentia, is the most guarded potion in his stash. The only times he uses it is when a student from an abusive home is too scared to tell him what’s going on, in which case he finds them somewhere private, asks them if they’d be okay with it and if so which teacher they want to be there to ask the questions (usually Remus, Sirius, or himself), and then administers the potion and leaves or begins to ask yes or no questions. It’s helped a lot of kids escape their families.

He tries to ease trepidations about himself early in the school year, since he’s aware he can be intimidating and the rampant stories regarding his time under Voldemort (though entirely as a spy) do not help. His friendships with Remus and Sirius often serve to alleviate students’ fears though, as they tend to tell embarrassing stories about him from their own Hogwarts days that make him seem more human (and make him want to strangle them, but that’s neither here nor there).

Every year, he works with Remus and Lily to arrange Muggleborn Pride. It’s an incredibly popular event with tons of Muggle inventions and artifacts floating through the air over students’ heads. At any time they can reach up and pull one down to study it. Many students dress as their favorite Muggle icons and characters. Because of this, Muggleborn students are more comfortable being who they are than ever before. (Some have even reclaimed the word Mudblood by setting up mud pits during their Pride.) (They also have more Slytherin Muggleborns now than any other time in recorded history.)

He tells Regulus’ story to every class of students, to teach them what true bravery is and how love and family, even if not blood, can change the course of history. Regulus survived his encounter with the Horcruxes and worked to destroy them and eventually Voldemort, but now lives away from the public eye in a secluded part of Muggle London. He and Severus are friends and visit often, and Regulus will occasionally come back to Hogwarts to say hello to his brother and mum (Remus), but for the most part he keeps his life intensely private. He allows his family to tell his story because he wants other kids to know they are not alone and that there is a way out, and that you are not a bad person for things you did in your childhood. Severus does his best to do it justice.

He has incredibly loud arguments with Dumbledore until he finally agrees to implement sex ed as a mandatory class at Hogwarts. Severus works with the other Marauders on the curriculum and they try to include multiple angles and identities in their lesson plan. At first they try to trust Remus with it, but Remus doesn’t go anywhere without Sirius who is less than tactful and Remus himself has some deadpan sarcasm and a lack of shame to rival James Potter’s, so. They try Lily. She can’t stop giggling. Finally they beg Regulus to come back and teach it. He’s surprisingly… perfect for the job. (He steals parenting books from Amir, that’s his secret.)

When James visits, everything becomes chaos for a bit. While he mostly hangs out with Sirius and Remus and causes trouble with them, he certainly seems to enjoy sitting in the back of Severus’ classroom and bothering him during lessons. The only way to get him to leave is to turn into a snake and wind himself around his shoulders, which makes James shriek and sputter and run away (James has always had an irrational fear of snakes; odd that he married one then, innit?). But when James isn’t causing chaos, he’s following Severus around adoringly and grabbing at his hand, whispering jokes in his ear and kissing his cheek. Despite all of the times he’s a pain in the ass, there are always these little moments that remind Severus why he fell in love with him in the first place (entirely unwillingly and with much stubborn pride on both ends, but, well. It is what it is and they got here eventually, so that’s all that matters).

When Lily visits, everything is calm. She reigns all of the Marauders in and forces them to have picnics under the tree where they all used to do homework. She often holds Severus’ hand and dances with him there, turning his insides to useless goo. She’s always full of laughter and fairy bells, and though she makes every student question their priorities and life decisions, she’s a favorite of them all. Not a day goes by that someone doesn’t pull him aside and say, “You’re a lucky, lucky man.” (Or, in James’ case: “Fuck, love, how’d we bloody manage that?” (Severus just shrugs. It’s not like he knows.))

He helps kids with autism feel more like they belong. He also works to educate non-autistic students how to better socialize and respect those who are, and takes extra care to dispel myths about autism and its causes, effects, and characteristics. Lily helps when she can.

Above all, Severus tries to give his students the education he never had. Anything he can provide for them he will. He’s been given a second chance and by Merlin is he going to bloody use it.