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#but at least she didnt wake her dad
xxlelaxx · 11 months
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I feel like the worst mom ever and I've only been at this for a day.
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opens-up-4-nobody · 7 months
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...
#had an interesting conversation with my sister the other day. odd i guess bc my sister is pretty smart#on paper shes smarter than me. or at least less dyslexic than me#but she didnt seem to kno what cancer is. i mean like how it works. i mean. cancer is a mistake. a confluence of unfortunate accidents#leading to unrestrained cellular growth. when it metastasizes. when it moves to other parts of the body. those same cells continue growing#if u have smooth muscle cancer and it moves to your kidney. you body is trying to grow more smooth muscle on your kidney#at least as i understand it. and she asked why it wants to kill you. it doesnt want anything. it just is. its not a thing of malicious#intent. its neutral. it grows. it takes up resources. it takes up space. and it grows and grows until the organ it grows on stops#functioning properly. like a parasite she said. but no. not like a parasite. it grows like an empty space. a mass of flesh. a constant#obstructive pressure. it grows like only a tumor can. i dunno. it didnt seem to connect with her that this thing didnt want to kill our mom#but it did anyway. and she felt weird about how long she lived after they took her off any support. but thats how cancer kills#it stops an organ from functioning and most of those r important so it only takes one. so her heart kept beating for 12 more hrs bc it was#meant to beat for 40 more years. but not much it could do without working kidneys and without working blood#but that's life. that's death. that's nature. its all nutral even if it feels horrible to the individual.#i dunno. i thought it was interesting. shes 25 and her mother had cancer for 10 years so id think shed kno more#we're at a weird phase now bc its been a week since she died and everything feels normal. we'll see what happens at the wake this week#its been interesting for sure bc she was sick for 10 years but my parents didnt prepare at all for her to die#so my dad is scrambling to put together the pieces shr left behind to make sure that all the bills r paid and whatnot. he had to guess her#computer password. she didnt tell us what she wanted us to have. she didnt tell us the importance of her jewelry and who it belonged to#before her. i dunno. we're seeing the outline of my mothers Pathology in what she left behind. both in the physical objects and in the#feelings she imparted. i dunno. its been weird#unrelated
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fable-x4 · 1 month
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Doing this because it makes me happy •Ꮂ•. Im making it difficult on all of you though.
1 note- I'll go drink water
10 notes - I'll set alarms to actually care for myself
50 notes - set up a daily productivity system so I stop wasting my time doing nothing.
100 notes - ask my friends to help me buy a skirt
500 notes - get a bra & a whole bunch of other affirming clothing !!!
1k - tell my dad that my gf is also trans
2.5k - ask my dad to address me by my prefferred name & pronouns 1k went pretty poorly, so I dont feel super comfortable making an attempt on this.
5k - try to get therapy/psychologist
10k - girl mode at all times (start actively wearing makeup/clothing/doing voice training around people at all times)
50k - try for HRT (0% chance) (also no guarantee on this one)
Asfgg. It feels surprisingly good to have a bunch of strangers who want me to be happy
I have now set up alarms for eating, waking up, and hygene related stuff. I seriously doubt we get to 500, but this has made me significantly happier •Ꮂ•
Doing some math... 25 notes in 4 hours. 6.25 notes per hour. 8000 hours or 333 days until this hits 50k. Hrt in a year ig.
Um. Wow. Its been a day, and we're almost at 300. Everything 500 & below was supposed to be things I'd do with minimal intervention. But now, we're getting to the scarier stuff. I am very intimidated, but also excited
My gf really badly wanted to be here when I buy some of the clothing, so the skirt will be this week, the rest of the clothing will be when she comes back from vacation
Saying that you're force femming me is so not allowed. This is unfair. You have no right to make me feel the ways Im feelingggg. Stop making me happy.
Welp. I told him about my girlfriend. And things went about as poorly as expected. He said that Im parroting what other people think. Slowly taking little parts of them, and applying them to myself. Specifically, being trans. He didnt even leave it to maybes. He said with certainty that I was copying everyone else. I know 9 trans people total. Only 2 of them are my close friends. Everyone else, Im barely aquaintences with. I should have told him that regardless of whatever theories he has, this has boosted my confidence massively. Slightly less excited for 2.5k notes. At least everything after that is very positive. And at least this lets me talk about my girlfriend for ages. I dont have to say her deadname through gritted teeth. Oh context. He already knows Im trans but was ignoring it.
I GOT A SKIRT!!!!!
Thank all of you so much. At first when I got the skirt, I was pretty intimidated by the idea of showing my legs. I thought everyone will just see me as a man. But there's a degree of confidence you all have given me. Yeah. Im pretty. Yeah, Im beautiful even. Yeah. Its a friggin fantastic skirt. And anyone who thinks otherwise is dumb. Im happy, and thats what matters.
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the-s1lly-corner · 11 months
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*explodes into your request box*
HEY HEY HEY, im back.
Came to ask an platonic Child!reader with the rest of the gang.
BUT HEAR ME OUT
Child reader is like an wolf in sheep's clothing, like reader has an cute expression on their face but when someone tries to touch them, they'll go like: "touch me and ill rip your hand off" in a full innocent voice and that cute smile.
And child reader has shark teeth.
Tyy!
*explodes*
- 🦭
The cast x child!reader (platonic)
throwing this together after waking up from a really nice nap! i still have the kinger request to work on but my brains still stumped.. sobs.. requests are still open by the way! you can find the link to my rules in my previous post, or you can look in my pinned! :O apologies if some sections for the characters are a little short, my brains still a lil okfvokffvovf from waking up TToTT
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CAINE:
a child? in the circus?
he doesnt quite know how to make of it, i mean... its not like he has to make any accommodations, the circus is a place for all ages afterall!
i give you this new concept: dad caine
lightly scolds you when you threaten someone, bad manners!
i think he would be like a stereotypical eccentric dad
in house adventures seem to tone down just a touch so theyre not too intense or dangerous for you, keeps an eye on you to make sure you dont get stuck anywhere or flung across the room
rip bubble, you probably pop them when theyre within a foot of you
pinches your cheek only to have his hand comically chomped off ("now now (reader)! what did i tell you about biting! time out!)
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POMNI:
similar confusion that caine has, but like, more so
how did a kid even get their hands on one of the headsets??
honestly i think pomni might be the type to be uncomfortable around kids; she doesnt hate them she just doesnt know what to do with them
also kids can possess a different kind of cruelness when they really put their minds to it and shes already in a mentally precarious position as it is
she doesnt avoid you though!
was bitten a grand total of one times, she made the mistake of trying to take you somewhere during an IHA and she didnt make you aware that she was going to put her hand on your shoulder
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JAX:
okay you cant swear in the circus, but i feel like jax has some very creative ways to work around that, making these new colorful euphemisms that dont skip out on the crudeness. he teaches you some of his favorites just to watch the world burn
lightning fast reflexes, should you try to bite or hit him; not that hes going to try to put his hands on you
actually
i can see him picking you up via scooping his hands under your arms, or literally just holding you up by the scruff of your next
congrats theres now the image of jax holding a flailing sheep child in our heads. his shins will be kicked in the second you get put down
thinks its funny when people have to do double takes when you let out a threat or say something dark
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RAGATHA:
i think she would be a cool babysitter, or big sister figure to you
similar to caine she will lightly scold you when you're being 'rude'
doesnt try to figure out why you dont like being touched, also respects it. respects your space as well, she doesnt totally baby you
she is a little sad that a kid so young got stuck in the digital world, though
even if you could remember things, i dont think she would ask out of fear of possibly upsetting you
likes making you little things (small pillows, plushes, ect) since i can see her being into sewing.. might be because shes a doll, though
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KINGER:
i said it once and ill say it again, kinger is dad. like i already hc he had kids before getting stuck in the digital world, but i also like to hc that he and gangle have a dad/kid relationship, at least when kinger was less... paranoid
like he still has the capacity to be a father figure to you, but i think with you being a little... ermrmfl.. he might be a little put off
tells you stories about "being a king" (ie embellishing the one time he was put in charge during an IHA ages ago) and tells you about some previous in house adventures
youre so short he genuinely doesnt see you approaching sometimes so he either gets jumpscared by you or literally trips over you on accident
is so so apologetic once he gets over the initial shock of suddenly meeting the floor
really if you follow this guy around and show interest in his interests hes gonna adopt you
he knows your threats arent empty, even if they arent hes not going to try to find out
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ZOOBLE:
zooble seems like the type of person to find some vague amusement in kids swearing or saying out of pocket stuff, i cant explain why
cant teach you swear words thanks to the censoring of the digital world but hey... they can still spell it out...
honestly i hc that zooble themselves doesnt like being touched so hey you dont have to worry about that, they personally get it
cool older sibling energy. while ragatha gives off sweet n caring older sister, zooble gives off the energy of a cool older sibling who like. idfk skateboards or something
zooble skateboarding real
not much else to say here
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GANGLE:
similar to pomnis but this is more so because gangle is intimidated by other people thanks to her shyness!
i think gangle would be in the same boat as you and zooble, in terms of touching, but in gangles case its because shes made of ribbon and thus can be pushed around very easily
would cry on the off chance you snap at her :(
she lets you into her room sometimes to let you draw with her! kids like drawing right?
thats her reasoning, at least
i mean hey, it gives you something to do and gives you a break from all the chaos
actually pretty okay when her comedy mask isnt broken, actually makes an attempt to properly get to know you and crack a few jokes
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soggyriceee · 1 year
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Helping Hand | dbf!Captain Price
summary: after your parents argue again, you walk over to your neighbors house who, you've had relations with in the past. true feelings are brought up be end in the most romantic way, loooooong back story but I feel like that makes the smut part of it so much better
warnings: dbf!Price, female!reader, age gap (reader 22, Price 45), unprotected P in V, fingering, daddy kink (bc hes daddy)
another restless night. your mom screaming at your dad for being at the bar late at night, him screaming back that he needed the break. "I work 60 hours a week!" he'd yell. "you are never home for dinner, barely make it to your kids important days!" she'd yell back, sometimes throwing a pan at him. it was bad. and you'd have to hear it every other night. your brothers drinking was no help either. family arguments were common, no matter how much you tried to avoid them. your mom would burst into your room, telling you to take her side, your father having the same idea.
"can you guys please stop I have exams tomorrow." you remember telling them, trying your hardest to focus on the notes in front of you. it was 12 in the morning. they were all supposed to be asleep. but of course, your dad stumbled in drunkly, waking up your mom and brother. it was peaceful in the house until it wasn't. thats why you'd often saunter over to your neighbor, John, to get some sleep.
"of course kid, you never have to ask." he always told you, smiling down as he opened the door wide. his wife was always delighted to have you over, she saw you as one of her own seeing as they never had kids. John was too busy with the military, kids was never truly an option for him. but he never saw you as his own, as his kid. he saw you as a woman. a woman who caught his eye the second she moved in next door two years ago.
your family had moved next door so it was closer to your college, but also to your fathers job. and Price and his wife were very quick to welcome you all into the neighborhood. they were the first people who invited you to their cookouts, parties. anything. your father had grown so close to Price, it was like they were brothers. and thats what made Price's feelings towards you even more conflicted and morally wrong. he knew he couldn't pursue you. he was significantly older than you, married and friends with your father. there were a surplus of negatives rather than positives and he was not willing to risk anything.
but when the summer time hit, and you'd slide into his pool, the pink or white bikini latching to your skin, he couldn't help but excuse himself up to his room and fuck into his fist, moaning your name into his hand. and what was the worst part about it all, he didnt care about what his wife would think. he cared what you'd think.
his marriage was falling apart quickly. his wife was very passionate about having kids, even though she was 40. "please, at least before im dried up for good." she'd beg him. but he wouldn't budge. kids was not something he wanted to have, ever. and because of that arguments were not a foreign thing for the two of them. so, it wasn't that you were young. or maybe it was. but it was because you would give him a new sense of life, a breath of fresh air away from arguments and constant stress.
the first night you had come to his home, tears falling from your cheeks, he was instantly worried. he pulled you into the house, pulling you into his chest. his wife came out quickly, gaping at your disheveled look. "oh my.. what happened my dear?" she ask, dropping the cup of tea in hand and running to hug you alongside John.
from that night on you made it routine to come sleep over in their house, whenever you needed. they even gave you a key. you felt more at home with them than you did at your home. they let you decorate the guest room into your own, took you out on small little events. it gave John's wife a sense of motherhood, one that she wanted for years.
so, when you and Price were in your room together, making out passionately, his hand gripping your boobs, your hands tangled in his hair, it didnt strike her as odd when she walked in to see you both on your bed. "she was having a hard time in school.. English test, right?" John said to her, quick to have an excuse. you nodded, swallowing hard. "y-yea I just.. needed to vent." you said, looking at her.
that was a month ago of course, she had believed you both. but that was the last time you and Price had ever really done anything of sorts again. and that was the last time you had been to their house. the feelings, tension between you both was too much and you both knew, that you wouldn't be able to make the right decisions if you both were alone together again.
but things were getting hard again and you needed to escape home. another family fight, this time about your father bringing up another woman's name during sex. it was disturbing, gross and uncomfortable for you to be around. but the screaming, breaking glass. it was not something you wanted to spend your summer night listening to.
looking out the window, you bit your bottom lip before making the final decision to sneak out and head over to your home. your real home. grabbing your phone, laptop and AirPods, you made your way out the window, landing on the mini roof in front of your window and slowly, climbing down to where the floor was. silently, you made your way across your lawn and over to Mr. Price's, looking at all the new flowers his wife had recently grown. a part of you felt guilt, selfish even for coming into their home, knowing what had happened between you and Price a few weeks ago. but you needed peace. you needed him.
knocking on the door, you crossed your arms behind your back, waiting anxiously for the door to open. a few seconds after, the door slowly opened, revealing a disheveled looking Price. his face was bright red, lips glossy. he had no shirt on, but a grey pair of sweats. a part of you felt embarrassed, but a bigger part of you felt a bit of pain, assuming he was just fucking his wife upstairs. "o-oh.. hey kid." he said, clearing his throat. " hi.. John. I guess this was a bad time but I-"
"no.. no its not." he said quickly, shaking his head. "I-i was just.." he pointed his thumb behind him, maintaining eye contact as he tried to find the words. you gave a small, apologetic smile before turning. but he was faster, gripping your wrist and pulling you back. " stay. please." he whispered, looking down at you, his eyes submissive. you swallowed before looking behind him, seeing an empty bottle of whiskey on the table. "isn't.. Mrs. Pri-" "she's not Mrs anymore.." he cut you off, looking away from you.
you felt guilty for bringing up the topic, even more guilty for thinking he was fucking her upstairs instead of you. his grip on you loosened and he backed away. "you don't have to stay.. but i'm assuming your here cause your parents. and you shouldn't.. be around that. you shouldn't be alone.. and I don't wanna be alone anymore either." he said, his words growing breathless towards the end, his eyes moving back to yours. your heart felt heavy for him. he was struggling for God knows how long alone. you gave him a small nod, his hand taking yours before he pulled you gently inside.
the door closed and you looked around the empty home, dishes and beer cans scattered about. "im sorry for the mess I uh.. its been hard to-" "let me help you." you turned to him, looking up at him. his doe eyes pierced into you, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips. that was all the confirmation you needed before turning back around, grabbing the empty cans and moving towards the kitchen recycling can. " thank you." you heard him say from the living room. "dont mention it. its a good distraction for me anyways." you said, the memory of your parents fighting coming back to you.
"hey.." he said, somehow coming up behind you. you quickly turned, wiping your eyes quickly and giving him a fake smile. his hands cupped your cheeks, his thumbs wiping the tears. " your here now.. safe." he whispered, keeping his eyes on yours. his lips trailed from your eyes to your lips, then back to your eyes. " John.." you whispered, pulling your head out of his grasp. he cleared his throat, stepping back. you both wanted it, bad. but it was wrong. and you both agreed to it, nonverbally of course, but it was an intuition.
" im sorry." you said softly, looking down to your shoes. "dont apologize. you have done nothing wrong." he said, patting your arm before walking away.
|
the rest of the night you spent in 'your room', reading up the rest of the texts you had for your exams. it was raining pretty hard outside, thundering and lightening. it was peaceful, more peaceful than your home.
stretching, you sat up from your bed and made your way down to the kitchen, hungry. you were sure price was hungry as well so why not make some grilled cheese? as you hummed your way down the hall, you heard what sounded like cries coming from inside John's room. you stopped in your tracks, standing in front of his room. you then heard empty bottles rolling against the floor. sighing, you leaned your head against the door. you didnt know if you should open the door, or stay outside. or just walk away.
but your heart was more powerful than your mind and you couldnt stop your hand from knocking against the door. "John.. can I come in?" you asked softly. when he stopped sniffling, and all you could hear was the empty bottles, you slowly opened the door. in front of you was John, sitting against his wall, tears running down his face with another bottle of whiskey by his side. he wasn't moving, wasn't blinking. just crying.
you slowly approached him, sitting in front of him. you took the bottle, placing it under his bed, out of sight. " can i.. hold your hand?" you asked, looking at his blank face. when he gave you a soft hum, you reached for his hand, cupping it in both of yours. he felt his breathing go from fast to slow, his hooded eyes making his way to yours. "i'm here John.. you don't have to be alone anymore.." you said softly, scooting closer.
for the next hour John spent crying into your chest, apologizing for being drunk around you. " I-im sorry for.. for this. I know drunk p-people probably make you feel-" "stop. you have a valid reason. I understand. id actually prefer being around drunk you than my drunk father anyways.." you said, running your hands through his hair. he held your waist, sniffling every now and then. he was finally calm, finally at peace. he felt safe in your arms and despite how embarrassing it was to be the older person seeking out comfort from the younger, he knew the last thing you'd do was judge him.
"are you hungry?" you asked, realizing John had been playing with the hem of your shirt for a bit. he looked up, his eyes scanning your lips before meeting your gaze. a soft smile was painted across your face, your hands still in his hair. "im.. im sorry." he whispered. before you could ask him what he meant, his lips pressed against yours, his hand slipping around the side of your neck. he poked your lips with his tongue, asking for permission. and you embarrassingly fast let him in.
he shifted so he was sitting now, pulling you onto his lap. his tongue roamed your mouth, occasionally sucking your tongue and earning a moan from you. when he finally pulled away, a short string of saliva connected you two. heavy pants and the sound of rain was all that could be heard as you both stared at each other, waiting for whats next. just as you opened your mouth, he spoke.
"i.. I know you think its because im drunk. but I promise you.. ive wanted to do that for so long." he whispered, eyes going back to your wet lips. " I dream of it, even when she was here. I couldnt bring myself to not think about you when I kissed her. when I fucked her. when I laid beside her. I know I sound like a horrible person, and I know what im risking here saying this to you. but.. but I have a feeling you feel the same about me.." he said softly, his hands holding your hips in place, hoping and praying you wouldn't run away, never speaking to him again. but you wouldn't do that. because you cared about him too much. you wanted this to happen as much as he did and you weren't going to let this moment slip away.
your hands cupped his face before leaning in again, John accepting the kiss before your lips even met. it was a slow, passionate kiss. he pulled you closer into him, moaning into the kiss when you'd pull at his bottom lip. his hands slowly snaked up your shirt, now holding your waist. "I need you.." you breathed against his lips, eyes still closed. it was desperate of you. but you didn't care. seeing how badly he wanted you made you want him even more. you didn't care if she walked in and saw the two of you, told your parents, the whole neighborhood. you guys could run away, live in a different state, a different country even. you guys could be happy. and as much as you wanted that, you knew the right now, this was the best you'd get.
he slowly pulled you off his lap, standing up before lifting you up. he laid you gently on the bed, resting between your legs. his lips attached to yours again, his hand finding your covered breast immediately. your whimpered into the kiss, thrusting your hips up to feel his hard on. his other hand found the side of your face, holding it as to keep you close. his lips moved down to your jaw, then your neck. he was careful to not make too many marks, especially ones to high up. you whimpered at his teeth nibbling your skin, his tongue sliding slowly across the mark to ease the pain. " ive wanted this.. for so long." he Sid against your skin, his hands working to pull down the pajama pants you had put on a while back.
he threw them behind him, not caring where they end up. he sat up, looking down at your panties. a large wet spot shone threw, a breathy chuckle eliciting from him. "is this all for me baby?" he asked, his fingertips ghosting over the spot. you nodded quickly, bucking your hips up. " use your words darling." he said again, looking up at you this time, his fingers still ghosting over the same spot. "y-yes.. yes daddy." his face formed a bright smile before looking back down at your panties, fingers slipping under the hem and pulling them down. "daddy huh? dont think ive ever been called that." his fingers ran up your slit and stopping right before your clit. you groaned at the teasing, trying to move your hips to meet his fingers.
"patience baby.. daddy wants to take his time with you." he said, chuckling at your desperation. nothing was funny to you, but you wanted him do bad, you'd be willing to do anything he asked of you in this moment. his fingers continued to tease you until he slid one inside you for just a second, before quickly pulling it back out. he loved how fast your cunt clenched around his finger, the surprised gasp leaving your lips when he slid it in, then out. "you like that?" he whispered, watching how your pussy clenched every time his finger got close to your hold again. "yes please.. please do it again." you begged from beneath him, eyes pleading with his distracted ones.
he smiled to himself, adding two fingers in at once this time and watching them completely disappear. your head pressed firmly against the pillow, your eyes squeezing shut. he moved his fingers in and out slowly, then fast, analyzing which pace got you reacting to his touch more. when he found it, he continued with it, his eyes finally moving up to your face. your beautiful face. he felt like he had fallen in love all over, watching your face twist in pleasure. it scared him most certainly. he'd spent what felt like years and years in a somewhat loveless marriage. seeing you, your beautiful face, kind personality and hearing your beautiful voice made him scared. scared that if he did commit to you, you both would end up like his marriage.
but now, he couldnt worry about that. your moans and whimpers were too much of a distraction for him to think about anything serious. he wanted to focus on now, and thats what he did. "feel good baby? is daddy making this pussy feel good?" he asked above you, body completely hovering over you as he tilted his head to the side, looking down at you. you nodded, opening your eyes and gripping his shoulders. "s-so good~" you whined, nodding your head quickly. " good girl. such a good girl for me aren't you? gonna cum on daddy fingers huh? gonna show daddy how good you feel?" he asked, his thumb quick to find your clit and moving at the same pace your fingers were.
no matter how hard you tried to talk, his fingers were doing magic on your lower region. you felt a knot forming at the pit of your stomach, your moans increasing in pitch. " I-im gonna cum" you cried out, pulling him down into your chest and hugging his shoulders. he grunted in your ear, keeping the same continuous pace, whispering how beautiful you were, how hes gonna claim your pussy. how hes gonna gonna make love to you, rather than just fuck you. his genuine words, surprisingly, made you finish, your cum soaking both him and his bed sheets. he gasped, peeking down at your cunt as his fingers slowed in pace, listening to the squelching noises your pussy made for him.
he sat up, looking down at the mess beneath you both. he hadn't realized it, but his fingers kept moving in and out of you. it was like he was in a spell, a spell from your pussy. " j-john" you finally called out, getting his attention. he smiled and slid his fingers out, sliding them in his mouth. he hummed around them, causing you to hide your face in your hands. he was quick, however, to remove them. "dont hide from me. I want you to see how good you taste." he said before pressing his lips back onto yours. your own taste flooded your mouth, your hands tangling back into his hair.
at the same time, he began to pull his sweats down, his dick springing free, slapping against his lower stomach. the sound made you pull away and look down. to say you were nervous was an understatement. but he was quick to shut down any worries you had. "im gonna go slow with you.. I promise." he said, lifting your head. he gave another small smile down at you, rubbing your cheek with his thumb. you leaned into his touch, closing your eyes and smiling. it almost slipped from him, but he held back the ' I love you' as he watched you lean into him. his heart was fluttering and he felt like crying all over. happy tears though. because he was truly in love, an the knew that after this, you'd have to go back home. pretend like what happened never happened. at least in front of people. but he didnt want that. he wanted to show the world you were his and he was yours.
he was so deep in thought again, you had wrapped your legs around him to get his attention. "s-sorry. your just so beautiful" he smiled, kissing your forehead before standing from the bed, pulling his sweats and boxers off completely. he was quick to slide back between your legs, his tip hitting your soaked pussy. he looked down, grabbing the base and moving it around your cunt. "shit your fucking drenched honey." he whispered, watching as strings of your wetness rose from you as he lifted his dick away. you whimpered in embarrassment, a bright pink covering your cheeks.
"its sexy." he said, looking into your eyes. he swallowed before looking back down. "like I said, I wanna make love to you. I don't want this to be just us fucking. i.. I see you more than that." he said, his eyes wandering your body nervously before meeting your gaze. you smiled up at him, pulling him closer so your foreheads touched. " then make love to me John." you whispered, looking at him through your lashes.
his lips pressed onto yours, his hands holding onto your hands as he slowly, and carefully, slid into you. it was easy, considering your slick. but it still hurt, the stretching of your walls around his thickness. the moment you let out a pained whimper he stopped, telling you to tell him when you were ready for more. and it did take a while, but he eventually bottomed out inside your cunt, groaning at the warmth and wetness. his head fell into your neck, catching his breath before he tapped your hips. "are you ready for me love?" he asked into your neck, lifting his head to see your face when you answered. when you nodded, giving him a shy 'yes', his hips moved out, slow, and back in, slow.
at first it hurt. yes, you had small flings in college, and you had definitely told him about them before you figured out how in love with him you were. but never had they meant a lot to you. you are drunk for most of them, causing you to regret not waiting for the right guy which, in this case, would be John. you looked up at him, his bottom lip between his teeth as his browns knitted together. he let out soft grunts with every thrust, a breath after a few more. he looked beautiful, so handsome.
" darling s-stop looking up at me before i.. I finish too soon." he breathed out, looking into your eyes finally. you blushed and looked down to where your bodies connected. the sight alone made you clench around him, a whimper slipping past you. your hands found his neck, your eyes squeezing shut. his thrusts remained pretty slow, causing you to buck your hips up. "faster.. please." you whispered, opening your eyes to see his already on you. "anything for my princess." he responded, kissing your forehead as his thrusts picked up in pace. he wasn't going super fast, but he was going at a decent speed.
whimpers slipped past you with each thrust of his, your head falling back into the pillow. his name, and a few daddy's, slipped past your lips every so often, encouraging him to keep going. " f-fuck princess you're.. you're so tight" he groaned, his breathing picking up in pace. his grunts slowly turned into moans and you had assumed he was close. he took one leg and wrapped it around his waist, allowing deeper access into your cunt. his tip every so slightly hit your cervix, emitting more moans from you.
you hadn't realized it at first, but your nails dug into his back, leaving both crescent marks and scratches. and he fucking loved it. it was your way of marking his body, what was yours. he wanted more. " fuck baby.. mark me. I-im all yours~" he moaned, his head dropping into your chest as his thrusts began to become a bit more fast. he was certainly close, and you were too. " John im gonna cum" you moaned, leg tightening around his waist.
his breathing grew rapid, his head raising to look down at you with hooded eyes. his hands gripped the side of your neck, his other around your hip. he felt his dick pulse inside you, scared of cumming inside you, but also hoping you'd let him. "inside me.. please" you whimpered out, sensing his worry. he gave out a quiet whimper, his eyes squeezing shut.
it was perfect, your bodied moving together. and what made it even more perfect was the fact you both were going to cum, together. it was beyond romantic and made the feelings between you both even stronger. he opened his eyes, feeling as though he couldnt hold back any longer. he didnt know what had came over him, if it was your pussy, the alcohol, or just his emotions, but he couldnt stop the words from flowing out.
" fuck princess I-im cumming- fuck I love you.. oh I fucking..love. you!" he groaned, the last few words accompanied with a powerful thrust. his cum shot into you, a loud groan and a gasp escaping him. his grip on you tightened, his eyes watching as your cum shot out of you as well, mixing with his.
his eyes fluttered closed, his body falling onto you. you looked up at the ceiling, breathing hard as you just recalled what he had admitted to you. 'he loves me..?' you though, your chest feeling heavy, but a good heavy.
he eventually rose up, swallowing as he looked down at you. "I-im sorry im probably still drunk I didnt mean-" your lips slammed against his, discontinuing the sentence he had planned. " I love you to John." you said against his lips. you felt the smile spread across his lips as he moved back down to kiss you, his arms wrapping around your waist and pulling you into him.
the rest of the night you both spent cuddling, watching tiktoks on your phone. when you eventually dozed off, he placed your phone on the charger, went to use the bathroom one last time before coming back next to you. he pulled you into his chest, spooning you. he kissed your bare shoulders, whispering 'I love you' after each peck. he was happy. he didnt worry too badly about what could happen. he was happy now. and he wanted to stay that way forever.
| aghhh after serious writers block I give you guys this. this was a lot more cute than my other ones so I hope you all enjoyed this as much as I did |
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aonungyoufuck · 2 years
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Runaway {pt 2}
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Parts: One , Three
Synopsis: Small Family moment with your Brothers. Ao’nung confesses why he stayed. Ao’nung hissing at his mom 
“Sister. I bring you my hunt today” Lo’ak said barging in as if you hadn’t been asleep. 
Groaning, you rubbed your head as you sat up. “Eywa, Lo’ak you could have at least made noise just so i wake up normally”
“Sorry” 
You could see Neteyam come up behind him and smacked him. 
“You’ll be happy to know Everything is well in the family. Cant say Lo’ak hasn’t gotten into a few scuffles here and there however”
“ I have not!”
“Of course he did”
Neteyam nodded. He had always been able to confide with you as you two both had the same responsibility to look after your youngers. “I am guilty of it too tho. Had to make sure this Skxawng didn't get lost as sea as well” 
“Translation: He wanted to have fun” Lo’ak Said slicing the fish he had Brought to you
You could only roll your eyes as you took a bit of the fruit that had been left there. 
“I heard Ronal isn’t at all too pleased to know Ao’nung stayed here last night” Neteyam said
“HE STAYED HERE? AT NIGHT? WITH YOU?”
“Oh please I was asleep. Apparently the fool slept sitting” you spoke watching Lo’ak prepare your food. Luckily enough he was getting better and better. Perhaps your mother taught him a thing or two. “However, I am going to ask Ronal if she could Teach me. Not train me per say but hopefully something so i can repay her kindness. I mean once this baby is born its really just Tsireya. I would like to help her, you know?” 
“Hmm Maybe. If Ronal would allow you such” Neteyam said Splitting the food to you three. 
“Where’s The rest of the family?”
“Mom is preparing some food for Kiri and Tuk. I think Dad’s still Out with Tonowari? I dont know for what really tho so i cant really say” Neteyam spoke handing you bits and pieces of the fish and fruit.
It made you smile, and roll your eyes. You weren’t a child but it was nice of him to know he still cared for you as such. Even tho you werent at all that much younger than him. 
“I see” You nodded as you continued to eat. You should give Lo’ak credit for the meat being prepared well. 
“Its nice all of us. Eating like this” 
“Yeah cause we don't eat” You spoke feeling a hard slap to your side. “LO’AK?”
“You know what i mean okay”
“Lo’ak do not hurt our sister. Cant you see she is on her deathbed” 
“You both are the worst you know? It would be you dead if i hadn’t stepped in you know?” 
It was just this for a while. You didnt count the seconds that passed. You just basked in it. But soon they had to leave. You bid them farewell and to tell the rest of the family to enjoy their night. As you sat there. Waiting. And it hadn’t been long till you heard the jostling of beads at the door. 
“You may come in” 
To no one's surprise but maybe Ao’nung himself. He stepped in. “Mother brought this” he spoke, handing you the bowl of very still Wet Algae along with some roots that had been boiled alongside it. “Its suppose to help with any internal pain you may feel"
“Thank you” If it was bitter tasting well you didnt have to let him know. “ i heard you got one nasty cramp on your back since you stayed here last night”
“Well you heard wrong”
“Ao’nung. I saw you” You said giggling a bit to see his ears flatten. 
“Alright well what do you want me to do? You were basically giving me your last words last night. Cant exactly sleep knowing id be blamed for leaving you alone”  He said moving the mess your brother’s didnt exactly clean up. 
“Im sorry i left you on such a bad note” You apologized. Drinking the last bit of the bland broth and chewing on the roots. 
“Man. Your Brothers suck at cleaning you know?” 
“They tried their best” You could only chew harder. The question is harboring in your mind “may i ask you something?”
“You already did.  But go on” Ao’nung sat in front of you. 
“Do you think, I could ask your mother to teach me some stuff? Not Tsahik training or anything of that sort. But just to help her when your sibling is born?”
“I mean i dont think she’ll like it all too much. But she's a reasonable woman. So i know she'll teach you if you ask” Ao’nung took your fruit bowl from you and began eating “But you are the most Reasonable from your siblings too. Given you haven’t gotten into fights and you have learned our ways faster than your siblings. Well aside your sister” 
“ i guess you’re right, Maybe i did more good in not joining in on kicking your ass”
“Pff. You think you can beat me?”
“In anything Fish lips”
Ao’nung couldn't help but laugh. Making you smile as you watched. 
“I think this is the first time i heard you laugh like that. Its nice” you smiled at him looking at the floor as you felt your hair fall down. 
“Was the way i laughed before ugly or something?”
“Way to ruin the moment” you laughed a little rubbing your temple. “I meant in a sense where you aren't laughing out of mocking someone y'know?”
“Oh”
“Yeah oh” You Were getting tired. The food and the pain numbing as you laid down. “Now if you may. You better get going before your mother gets mad for you staying here again” you didn’t wait for a respond. Not that you could hold the sleep coming to you
But Ao’nung didnt move. His spear now at his side as he sat between your sleeping form and the only entrance to this place. He didn't know why. But something in him told him to just protect you while you were in this vulnerable state. 
He thought himself crazy. Why was he so persistent on caring for you? Why did he agree with his mother? Why wasn’t he bothered? But seeing you just lay there made him think. Made him fall back on seeing your body heave and wheeze with the pain of having an open wound. You were nearly dead. You almost died. It did not only affect Tsireya but himself too. 
He just kept watch grip tightening when he heard the faintest of noise. Tail laying atop of you making sure you kept breathing. Letting out a low hiss when he saw the curtain open. But quickly dropping his ears. 
“Ao’nung! Its time you head home” His mother spoke. Stern and cold. Looking down at you as you didnt stir. 
“But”
“No, I will not argue this. You are to go home and she will be sleeping here tonight alone. You can see her again tomorrow evening. I dont know why you want to but you can then. For now go home and head to bed” She ordered leaving no room to argue. 
She watched as he bit back his tongue. Standing up spear in hand as he walked out. Ronal only turned to look at you. Placing the wet paste on top of the sheer wraps around you. “ I dont get what this boy sees in protecting you. You are safe and alive. It should be enough” She muttered out. 
“Nete..yam” 
She looked at you. Your worried expression trembled as your hand shook and moved slightly, reaching out. She could only sigh in exhaustion. ‘Soon’ she thought as she had to think. She would rather swallow her pride than let Neytiri help her as she had offered for helping her children. But realistically what other option was there, she thought. 
“Hush now. You are well as is he” she could only whisper as if to ease your worried mind. Eywa had saved you, and that should be enough.
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equallyshaw · 9 months
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little lion | Luke hughes au! ↠ all about luke and liona. ↠ au Masterlist! ↠ also not in order, these are random thoughts!
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met in october 2023
they do not officially date until 11/04/2023
split time back and fourth between newark and greenwich village
the type of couple to wake up at sunrise, get a coffee and bagel from the corner truck and walk through central park
luke is for sure the one that runs into pigeons and acting like a fool
only to get kailey to laugh
life's mission of luke is to make kailey happy and laugh at all times
intimate touching instead of kissing in public, always having to hold hands or have a hand on a thigh, of their lower back. especially if they go out at night, luke makes sure they are glued to each other at all times
the most competitive board gamers (monoply- absolute feral and scene it harry potter- she will kill whoever- including luke to win. so will luke.)
kailey got luke into harry potter and made him read the books early on in their relationship
actually, she got him onto reading in general. will read anything now.
luke demands one broadway show a month from kailey, meaning they put on the cast album and she belts out the songs with him.
luke absolutely adores kaileys mom, helen. will constantly ask about her and shamelessly asks for home cooked meals from her.
kailey adores it and whenever he gets homesick, she brings him over to her mom's or invites her to hang out and he's grateful for the relationship
luke does not meet alex until July when she invites him out to Washington dc for a visit
one of their favorite dates is to go to painting or paint pottery
they also like to go to watch movies, because she is a movie fanatic and it's something simple to do
her first game that she goes to is the last home game before christmas break, with a win over detroit
nicknames for kailey: pretty girl, calls her by her middle name 'kai', my romashka - meaning my cammie or chamomile, and my lioness
nicknames for luke: pookie, lukey, my love, darling, and Mashunechka (an generic intimate nickname)
huge fans of ice cream and ice cream dates
huge sweettoothes in general
when summer comes around, kailey visits michigan as much as she can between working her nannying job and working at the local bookstore in georgtown.
once her dad finds out about him, kailey and him go to cape cod
around their 6 month mark, kailey see's something on social media and quickly feels like luke might be cheating on her based on the limited space between the two. she even calls her dad about it, but does not mention specifics.
their song is: say yes to heaven, by lana del ray
just like how people belt out to taylor swift and are obsessed with her? that's them with olivia rodrigo and tate mcrae. no hesitation.
when kailey's in a particular mood or stressed with school, luke will come over to her apartment or she will come to his and jacks and they will have a star wars marathon.
as a fashion major, she feels entitled to update his fashion. as well as jacks, because they both need it.
she researches curly hair routines, and the both of them continuously try new things to find out the perfect routine, for him.
she teaches him russian, dubbed "little lion lessons". she teaches him the basics and simple greetings and conversation words. he surprises her though about six months in when she is having a harder time with her mental health, and gives her a whole ass talk in russian and like she thought that she knew he was the one she wanted to marry. but she REALLY knew he was the one.
luke learns enough russian to have a basic conversation with kailey and alex. alex is pretty stunned to say the least. he goes, "you mean he didn't flunk out of highschool?" in old slavic to which luke didnt understand.
uncle geno is the BIGGEST fan of the two
she tells him before she tells her dad
when pittsburgh visits new jersey, he invites her out to dinner along with luke.
in summer of 2024, she joins the cast of hadestown at the off broadway theater for a limited time run as eurydice, for the month of august. luke comes to her first week of shows before heading to michigan to get some things settled, before pulling quinn, jack and his parents for the finale on the 29th. after a two-day staycation, her and luke head back up to nyc and jersey for the year.
cape cod is their place - they get a offseason house in 2028.
luke and kailey ended up going 4 times during their first summer being together
they have a very important talk one morning over coffee and croissants and just know that that is where they are meant to visit at least once an offseason.
some angsty thoughts:
once she graduates in 2026, she has a hard time figuring out what she wants to do. her dream is to open a boutique clothing store in manhattan somewhere or on the cape or georgetown, but doesn't know short term.
ends up going to Washington for about two months, and it just so happened to be when alex was moving from Washington to new york to get back together with kaileys mom once he retires at the age of 41, a year after kailey graduates, he and her mom decide to give things a go again after some really good years the past few.
but she's in Washington while he is back in michigan, and even though luke is trying his hardest to give her the space she needs and craves, its difficult. he is moody af and at times does NOT train.
kailey calls sent a text over in july, stating she needed a break for a bit and that she would reconnect with him once the season begins.
luke has such a shit show of a summer after that + the beginning of season.
kailey spends july through September in the hamptoms with her parents, after alex helping fulfill her mom's dream. summer in the hamptons. (for longer than a week)
luke gets hella jealous because andrei visits for a week in august before heading back to carolinas. he hates how close the two are now that they are on a break.
OH and he also does not like her bestie chris, and thinks he still is in love with her but we'll get a blurb for that at some point hehe
when kailey returns to nyc with her parents she does not expect to see luke in the city.
he always used to say he hated the city when he was not with her
that the reason he loved the city with her, was because she gave it life and energy. he loved seeing it through her eyes.
she was very shocked to see him and he was stunned too. he didn't expect to see her the first time he headed into the city.
but nico being the swiss princess that he is, has to come up and greet her when she goes to dinner with her parents at Soho house
and then the rest of the group comes up, and alex is NOT happy
he doesn't care for any of them, she whispers in russian "be nice dad."
but he see's luke and relaxes a bit.
he really likes luke and began to feel like maybe they could be the real deal before their break.
but anywho
alex talks some sense into his daughter (calls her a dummy) and literally drops her off at the train station to head down to jersey to talk to him. (will get blurb at some point!)
and she does
and yknow, they get back together and what not.
and ofcourse, not without luke promising that he's gonna marry her one day. even though they had talked about it many times, and their future together- she knew it to be soon.
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hope you all enjoyed!
please like and reblog if you did (:
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alivingtypo · 4 months
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I take notes when i watch new episodes so may i introduce my completely sane and succinct thoughts while watching 7x09
911 7x09 ashes, ashes 
wheel of fortune is fun 
Starting ahhhh the medal ceremony
Buck sitting between Tommy and Eddie is insane
I’m so proud of them omg 
Bobby’s proud face
Bobby MEDAL OF VALOUR
oh no Bobby 
Oh no Bobby 
Chim and maddie are so sweet
RAVI MY BOY
Tommy and buck are cute tho 
Oh fuck 
Gerard 
Homophobic cunt 
I love when Maddie interacts with others
Bobby freaking out ahh
Oh no the mayor or whatever councilwoman 
Oh my god I’m going to lose it if she fucks with the Wilson family I’m gonna lose it 
Oh my god talk you out of something RESIGNATION FUCK I WAS RIGHT 
BOBBY RETIRING 
IM FREAKING OUT 
WHO IS GOING TO REPLACE HIM 
if they split up the 118 I’m gonna throw up 
For fucks sake Eddie
A rowboat with your dead wife’s doppelgänger
WHAT WHY YOU SEEM SO FAMILIAR
this is wild 
Eddie pull yourself together she is not your wife or your girlfriend (or your husband) 
She’s really digging right to the core of him 
Amir is back 
Athena stop breaking the law 
Athena and Amir friendship feels right 
Is Bobby gonna kill himself bc I can’t handle that 
Bobby I’m going to cry 
He’s looking at his family 
Why is the music making this so much worse
His last call with the team maybe 
Bobby calling her Mother hen then looking at buck and Eddie 
He’s dading Ravi I’m gonna cry 
He’s having a dad moment with everyone one last time 
“What are you making” Not me you” “you’re the chef tonight”
Buck being the new 118 chef I’m gonna throw up
Bobby stop it 
Buck loved Bobby’s approval 
I’m crying 
Buck is so cute god
Father son moment I’m gonna throw up 
“Here’s to seven more” 
DAD SON DATING TALK MOMENT 
IM GONNA THROW UP 
OH NO 
KIM BUCK IS SEEING KIM
BUCK WATCH OUT 
HES LIKE FUCK 
WHO DID YOU SAY YOU WERE
Would you mind giving these to him for me. Bucks gonna go to Eddie’s and it’s gonna end bad 
DIAZ HOUSE 
HES LIKE WHY IS BUCK HERE 
BACK DOOR LMAO
MIRRORING THE SHANNON AT THE FIREHOUSE SCENE FUCK
EDDIE PLS BE SO FUCKING FOR REAL
they’re gonna argue aren’t they
It’s not like we’re having an affair GURL BE REAL RN 
I’m worried about you SAME 
The Wilson’s and Hans are so sweet
I’m gonna cry I love them 
Oh no fucking councilwoman is meddling isn’t she
We’re halfway through and I’m shaking 
Kim is shocked at least he told her I guess 
But I’m not her (pls let this be the end of it) 
Ok at lease he’s apologising 
Pls tell her you have a girlfriend
I want Marisol to walk in 
Eddie pls go to therapy
I think she was (the love of my life) girl rose coloured glasses 
Unfinished business
Omg he’s gonna say everything to her for closure (and then Marisol can walk in) 
Amir at the grant Nash house
I’m sweating 
Amir and councilwoman team up would end the world
Amir getting very angry Bobby is gonna lose it 
Oh no Bobby and Athena fight 
Getting your affairs in order oh my god no 
Bobby therapy pls 
Bobby baby 
Bobby and Athena are so sweet together
Pls communicate losers
Councilwoman I’m gonna fight you 
If councilwoman swoops in and takes Mara I’m gonna throw up 
She’s gonna ruin everything I’m gonna throw up
This is so fucked up
I’m gonna throw up
This is so fucked 
I’m gonna fight the councilwoman
Eddie oh god is that Marisol 
WHAT THE FUCK 
SHES DRESSED UO AS SHANNON WHAT 
OK SO MAYBE FOR CLOSURE BUT THIS IS FUCKED 
THE PSYCHOLOGICAL DAMAGE
he’s going for it 
Ok this is fucked but also kinda sweet
If they end up in bed I’m suing 
Go to therapy 
This is fucked 
I want Marisol to walk in 
YESSS 
CHRIS NO 
Bobby’s fucking house 
Pls 
Why is his dad in the kitchen ok dream ok 
Bobby mental break 
NOT THE BOOK 
ALL THE PEIPLE YOU DIDNT SAVE
YOU WERE A CHILD 
do you smell that
Fuck the poor house 
Not the garden that’s where the family all get together 
Athena oh no
Oh no oh no 
It’s gonna end on this isn’t it 
Oh my god 
Why isn’t Athena waking up
Oh my god 
The poor house 
NOOO NOT A HEART ATTSCK
HIS HEART STOPPED FUCK OFF
NO IF THEY KILL BOBBY IM DEAD 
THATS A CRUEL ENDING 
TRAILER 
Athena waking up and no Bobby
On a ventilator 
THIS IS FUCKED
so yeah i obviously have a very very clear mind while watching my weewoo show
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tea-and-secrets · 1 month
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ohhhhhhhhh my GOD i hate my stepmom SO MUCH right now I've taken the trash out THREE times today, I dusted and cleaned off every counter and table and cleaned the windows today, I moped and sweet and vacuumed today, I clean up HER AND MY DADS DISHES EVERY DAY
and its the least i can do cause I'm not in school right now (Summer break) and I'm not old enough to get a job yet
but nothing i do ever goes noticed by her everything I do she just seems to brush over and she loudly shit talks me to my dad "She does anything" if I stopped helping around the house they'd notice and i'd get in trouble but oh I fucking want to just stop, she can clean up her own dishes, she can wipe down the windows and tables and shelves every day, she can sweep every fucking day she can take the trash out three times
LET ME ALSO JUST SAY THAT WHEN SHE HAD ME TAKE OUT THE TRASH JUST NOW IT WASNT. EVEN. FULL. IT WAS ABOUT HALF FILLED DIDNT REALLY SMELL. SHE HAD MY DAD WAKE ME UP TO TAKE IT OUT AT 10 FUCKING PM BECAUSE "she never helps around" IM GONNA STAB MYSELF HOW ABOUT THAT? ILL MAKE SURE TO LEAVE MY BLOOD LYING AROUND TOO SINCE I NEVER FUCKINGDO ANYTHING HOW ABOUT THAT VICKY?
woaj sorry got a wee bit too silly there
.
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hearts401 · 10 months
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genuinely curious what is the pit dad au is it a good dad william au because I lowkey adore those please ramble about it I love listening to your rambles (if you have the time of course)
OOH pretty much? its a "william is a bad dad but shit happens and he realizes it early enough to fix it, or at least try" au!! plus some other drama ofc
basically william gets springlocked waaaay earlier on than in canon. he has an accident, is alone, and henry finds him too late. while henry is trying to get his body out of the suit, he wakes up and is like oh shit i died.
but he came back and he is ecstatic about that. His plan worked! he's (by all normal standards) immortal! and henry cleans him up and hes springbonnie instead of springtrap. (and of they take wills uhm. corpse out. williams rlly disturbed by it tho. henry finds that funny and they hold a funeral for william and everything and hes just. what.)
except springbon is sentient. bc springbon is my faborite. so williams got a buddy in his head! and springbon can control her own body still if she wants to! and springbon is new to parenting but she reeeeaally loves these kids
will just wants to experiment more with his newfound body and abilities and everything he can do but. without a bodyy... he cant do much off the stage unless he has the ability to walk around off of it without being in suit mode. which comes with needing to charge. and while he would totally just hook himself up to a random plug in his roomm springbon had henry cover them all with the little child proof plugs and will cant get them off bc his robot fingers r too big so if he stays in his room too long, he'll pass out (or just. power down? since hes a robot?)
so he's forced to interact with his family.
but he really does find he enjoys time away from work and his kids are not actually horrible obnoxious idiots like he'd always thoguht of them as (as a mixture of not wanting kids in the first place and being bitter that his wife is dead) and he realizes wow. this isnt so bad. he also bonds a lot more with henry and vanessa (the latter of which was just. his employee. he didnt know her well before but she's fun and helps him with maintenance when henrys busy)
in this au, Michael is 11-12, elizabeth is 7, and evan is 6! so they r pretty young. Michael does have built up resentment towards his father bc of how neglectful and cold he was, and williams like wow! that was shitty of me! mostly bc he sees howspringbonnie interacts with his kids and it vaguely reminds him of his wife. and hes like okay! time to reconcile with my kids! and while evan and liz eventually r like yeah this is cool mike is not. hes very hesitant to trust his father and doesnt liek him!!! grrr!!!! but william really wants to try!!!! try he will dammit!!!
on top of that will DID make the funtimes with the intent of experimenting with remnant but pitdad will is a wuss! he didnt make them to kill kids. he just knew remnant involved death and they were made properly to contain it, but not collect it. so basically he made machines to harvest souls without the harvesting part and jsut the souls. those blueprints and that research is concerning enough on its own tho... lets just say he wasnt on a great path and likely would've done bad things like in canon if he'd been left to his own devices. curiosity mixed with grief is a bitch and so is william afton
but the funtimes ARE sentient, and they know what they were made to do. at least circus baby does and she goes and tells everyone and they decide "yeah this place sucks lets just merge together and find a skinsuit" and that skinsuit was MEANT to be william but he. yk. has no skin anymore. his oldest son must be the second best thing, right?
also also also the missing kids are in fact missing! for other reasons tho heheheh
extra note but because of how remnant works william is TERRIFIED of fire. hes scared it'll split his soul from springbonnie so he's rllyyyy scared of fire and stuff!!!
i think thats all? thats all i can think of i could probably answer more specific questions tho this is the gist!!!! im glad u love my sillyguys and rambles ueueue
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sonny-whorezik · 8 months
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haiii ... like a week short of a month since i left everything.... i just wanted to use as Journal and catch up before i do Fully return to social media, gettin rid of the app after this post yet again:
has . been . rough. grief has been consistent the last month from my best friend and now ex leaving me, losing that new job due to being physically sick from grief and being unemployed an additional month, my best best friend my dog, sage, passed away last friday and although i left to drive to kansas i just didn't make it in time. She has wind chimes over her grave and passed listening to the sound of the wind chime my great grandma left for me. two days after her passing marked the First Full Year since my grandpa passed away, i had a dream the night before where we drove around looking at christmas lights with people no longer in my life and he just looked so so sad. i am consistently physically alone; i facetime a couple friends but i go outside alone, sleep/wake up alone, eat alone, this has been going on since i left arizona in november Most of my time is spent completely alone.
ive tried new habits. i meditate and stretch in the morning and night. i read a page a day of a stoicism book my dad got me last year with a propeller hat. i see a therapist weekly, wake up earlier, even floss now. The complete back to back to back grief has left me no choice but to just Do Something. while i would Love to share something with someone its best i reserve it to myself, yet here i am vacantly sharing my last month to who knows who...
my friend invited me to see stop making sense last night in a farther town, showed the original film not the remastered and general admission was all standing and everyone acted as if it was a real concert dancing and singing. this was my 6th time seeing it in a theater. did not cry once yet celebrated the experience i have had and although i will never have anything quite like i did with someone quite like them, at least i had it for a good portion of my life. had to devote this must be the place to myself, foreign. to be completely transparent, i do miss them every day. i do not cry like i used to, i dont let myself get consumed by thought and feeling, ive grown more desensitized as time has passed, but i still miss them of course. i consistently see things that remind me of them even when theyre not on my mind and when sage died i wanted to reach out so terribly; reminisce of the fort we built where she slept with us and i had no one to talk to but my mom who was with her til the end. i didnt. i havent reached out. it is not my place given they were the one to leave i just will not keep reaching out and chasing someone who sounded so blatantly apathetic on our last phone call. i tell myself it was just a form of self preservation to them but yknow. like. that's it, i have no choice but to experience grief with self compassion and continue on, wherever that goes.
i may be starting TMS treatment , having magnets zap my brain 5 days a week, 6 weeks. i see a cardiologist on the 30th since my chest frequently hurts and both ekgs have concerns in the pause between beats. my pulse at resting is consistently around 120 yet my blood pressure is fine; who knows. well i guess ill know actually in 10 days. im finishing a vape, got a full pack of cigarettes ive yet to touch yet plan to quit smoking here soon in hopes it helps. maybe after my pack to eliminate temptation yet not waste my money... i bought it an hour before sage passed. i barely drink coffee and dont use energy drinks anymore i do what i can for my heart now.
atticus still sleeps with me, most nights. sometimes he wanders the living room when i cant sleep. im almost halfway through galapagos. i washed my sheets for the first time since buying them in august. im very much alone and this is all fine i tell myself. the stoicism has encouraged me to alter my perspective on things more rationally as opposed to the wired self deprecating and depression-based "take everything personally" thought processes ive had for 18 years. im on my phone significantly less and i even wrote a piece on piano i may share after this post. ive been transposing it to cello, my grandma requested.
i have no interest in perusing anyone anytime soon still, whether its still too early or what i think i do just Need to do these things alone for a while. ive never found sole stability in others, i learned this at 6 with my dad, yet while outside aid would help, it is not a requirement to live however. forgive me for how long this is and for leaving once again there are a few of you i used to talk to daily and now ive just got a few contacts in my phone.
despite chronic mental illness, mourning, loneliness, you name it, ive never taken this approach before. i will typically have a suicide attempt yet here i am doing a pancake stretch and ommm-ing every morning. i keep as busy as i can, today i went through every single thing i own to sort donations and the day before i deep cleaned. there is a box wrapped in a blanket of some of the things that remind me of them. i went through it today and brought out some things like the books theyve given me, it doesnt hurt as much anymore to remember. im donating the mugs i never gave them and the one theyd use at my house when theyd come over. all their letters havent been reread yet sit in between the photo of us in the cave. it was nice to see. i am so honored they let me, of all people, share these experiences with them. i am more thankful it happened then miserable itll never happen again; at least i had it for a while. i say this yet if a year passes and i hear from them, i would love to reconnect: hear how their life has been, what they've been doing, how their family is and if they are doing better. if this has helped. while for 6 years i believed they were really it for me, whether we ever dated or not ive always considered them the only one who Really Knew who i was, how i worked, you name it. although im "moving on" by taking care of myself more, it is upsetting to admit if i ever have a chance again, id take it in a heartbeat. i say this yet still believe Even if i do never get a chance, that's okay too. While i would, i dont anticipate it, rely on it, sit in denial "theyll surely come back," its alright if they never do. i live each day as if they never will yet to my core do know that i would try again
a knee ways .. i hope you, whoever reads, is doing okay, that you feel alright and what not. you dont have to feel good every day, but at the least alright i hope ... not sure if/when ill come back maybe just once a month im unsure yet .was just in a solid enough state to do this for a moment . wish you all well ,
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084392 · 1 year
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list of media that i can remember. has made me shed at least one tear over the years....
....the end of one of the drawn to life games. the one that ended with someone waking up from a coma????? i was playing it on my way out the door i think. frankly im pretty sure i was just mindlessly crying bc the ending was so. odd to me as a child tho???
pmd sky. but. ive only cried one(1) time that i can remember about the main story ending, years after my original playthru when i was replaying it.....but lol no the thing that made me BAWL as a kid was the end of igglybuff the prodigy.....
...........................that voltron episode where the princess had to destroy her dads hologram................
wolf from kipos backstory...also yumyan too i think??
HAZEL INFINITY TRAIN.
eveyrthing everywhere all at once. 1. when evelyn saw waymond on the steps in the universe where she didnt go with him and he was just as successful without her.... 2. In Another Life, I Would Have Really Liked Just Doing Laundry And Taxes With You. 3. the scene between evelyn and joy at the end....
...man and these are just the ones i remember😭
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mag200 · 1 year
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music recs uuuuh lessee
nerdy folk/filk: Vixy and Tony, any album really. their newest "We Are Who We Are" is their best imo, but I have a particular soft spot for some of the tracks on "Thirteen" (specifically the title track, Mal's Song, and Companion).
SJ Tucker, also most albums, she's a little more fae-leaning in topic, and her album Mischief is my favorite.
folk/indie/rock/idek: The Amazing Devil, their album ruin. All their albums are great, The Horror and the Wild and Love Run are both wonderful, but ruin is just blast your butt off amazing
Juniper Vale, Everything is Color. Juniper Vale is just... really pretty music idk man. The singer's voice is so pretty. Slightly poppier sound but then they're pure folk when they go full acoustic, so I think it goes here.
indie rock: James Marriot. He's only got like one EP out, Bitter Tongues, but it's worth it, and his singles are also great. He started putting out music during the pandemic and he's relatively popular in certain online circles but like, the music's actually REALLY good.
Lovejoy, EP Wake Up & It's Over has already been recced and at this point even if they're new and not yet SUPER well known they're not obscure by any means, but I'm seconding it. it just goes so fucking hard.
Wilbur Soot, Your City Gave Me Asthma. Wilbur Soot is the online... persona? stage name? of Lovejoy's frontman Will Gold, and this was one of his solo projects before Lovejoy's creation. It's quiet, mostly just one guitar and sometimes a drum, and it's a melancholy depressing sort of album, but it's great for like sitting with your headphones on staring out the window at the rain, if you know what I mean.
Sub-Radio, EP Past Selves. If you've seen that "Stacey's Dad" tiktok go around? That's Sub-Radio. They're queer (or at least the frontman is) and they're just so uplifting musically. Even when the lyrics are a little less happy, I'm constantly filled with joy listening to their music. Highly recommend.
that's all I've got. I'd recommend the Mechs but I'm preeeeetty sure you know them already. ;)
this is so many thank you i appreciate it!!!
i didnt realize wilbur soot was a music person, i've only seen him mentioned sometimes on tumblr and i think i thought he was a video game streamer lmao.
i admit i dont rlly like the amazing devil but i usually like music that sounds like them, idk its nothing against them tho
and yeah i love the mechs <3
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Apparently, when my parents were dating, my dad went to my mom's house at night. My mom startled very easily and also sometimes woke up screaming for no reason. She was asleep, of course, and he didnt want to alarm her. For some reason, he thought the least alarming way to wake someone up was to crouch at the foot of the bed and grab them by their feet. So on multiple occasions, my mom woke up in the middle of the night to the sight of some guys head at the bottom of the bed and him touching her feet. Isn't that great?
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bonesandthebees · 1 year
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Okay longer review for glass ch18 time :DD man what an amazing chapter. Got duped waking up thinking im gonna get crimeboys, and then i got both crimeboys AND sandduo
Im gonna skim reread it as i review
hES USING WILBUR?!?#$ HELP BROO ITS SO SMOOTH AT THIS POINT
There was like one chapter where i caught it and i felt so proud of myself, but after that i just get so invested that i dont even notice until someone points it out lmaooo
I think I did notice when it switched to Pythia, at least subconsciously bc I paused at it and scrolled up a bit to see if it'd always been Pythia but ig I didnt scroll up enough lmaoooo
Ohkygod he switches to Pythia the minute Phil enters the room ohkgyfo u cant be playing around with the narrative like this bee, u are way too smart wtf... I'm still in awe with how flawlessly you play around with the change of name. It's always intentional, and yet it feels so natural when you read it. It doesn't feel like a conscious decision from Wilbur at all, ughh it's so good!!!!
Goddddd I love codependent crimeboys so much bro ohmgydo and u always write it Perfectly ty amen
I think ive said this before but ur just so good at characterization man like helloooo
Each fic!crimeboys are so unique to each other, but you could remove their names and I'd still know they were crimeboys. They still feel like them and ahhh i love them so much
Also bro i totally called Phil waiting for them 😭 it made me so tense LMAOOO
Wilbur fr was like "We're quiet we r chilling!!" Like no sir. No u are not
Its the fact that Phil knew the answer to all his questions, he knew Tommy left him alone aaaaaaaaaaa
I cant do this man theyre all so wheofidbekdhdlkflfek
The fact that neither of them told Phil about the sketchy guy who saw Wilbur is making me so scared tho like noooo guyssss ur already in trouble, just be safe about it and tell the truth noooooo 😭😭😭
Phil is such a dad in this scene ohmygod
Also im laughing, their punishment is they cant talk to each other 😭😭
“Then just close your eyes,” Phil said, almost in the exact same way Tommy had.
Like father, like son [bawls]
Although the Pythia was desperate to know why Phil had paused for so long after seeing his face, he simply nodded, and tried not to flinch when Phil’s free hand grabbed his chin to hold his head still.
Not my dumbass's first thought being "HES HIS SECRET LONG LOST SON" LMFAO FHFJFK
Then i was like "okay no its definitely bc of his age"
Brooo i just want the moment where they see each other without him closing his eyes rahhhhhhhhhssss
Also
I realize i said i was gonna skim reread this chap, but nope im just rereading it properly lmfao 😭😭😭 slow and steady pfff
Its so goood
Now I'll have 2 chapters from glass on speeddial for sure
God every moment of sandduo in this fic is just a parallel of their relationships with their gods im soooo 😭😭😭
When i first started this fic i was so certain that the majority of all Clara's things were just misinterpretations from her followers that got passed down century to century but now atp idek. Im skipping ahead and I'll probs talk more about it at the end of the chapter but like Kristin literally touched Wilbur- Clara's never gotten that close to him. Though maybe it's bc she's not as strongly connected? On both ends... Im rambling here as I theorize so I might not phrase this correctly but, like. My first thought was Phil said blood helped her connect better to the living world, so maybe that's why she can be physically here and not Clara, but I also thought about how maybe it does affect the relationship whether it's mutual or not, right? Cause Phil chose to be with her, there's trust on both ends. Wilbur got thrown into it, and maybe that affects the magic of the connection or smth. Or Clara's a bitch lmaoooo. I always appreciate seeing the god of life being the antagonist. I feel like it's not gonna be black and white though, things are not often with you hahahaha.
God that was a large paragraph whoops. I am certain though, that at least a large portion of the traditions they have (cough not being able to see the face cough) (just being treated as not a person lol), are things both misinterpreted or just plain ol made up to be able to better control the Pythia. Because, who wouldn't want to be able to fully control someone who can see the future? Idk how they'll ever find that out for sure but damn yeah, it's sad. Look at what you've done Bee, you've traumatized a perfectly good boy
Lmaoooo
Is there a limit to how long these things can get?? Spruce how do u separate them into diff parts, do u go by vibes or is there a limit LMFAOOO
Anyways
God. The way Phil knows what Wilburs thinking 😭😭😭 im gonna cryyyy theyre sooo ahdjfkfld
The way you describe all the tiny details, god, your writing feels so real. It feels like it breathes. I feel so immersed in it. I can not only see everything happening around me, I can feel it, as if I were there. I dunno, I just really appreciate all the tiny details you mention, and how you take care to remind us that his eyes are closed by describing the sounds around him, and how you mention him feeling odd when he winces bc of his face being numbed, like ik theyre not a big deal, but those details mean so much to me. They make everything feel so much more alive.
And the way you describe people's thoughts, they're so realistic rahhhhhhss. Your characters always feel truly human
I love your writing so much aaahhh
The cheer i let out when i saw the mate at their 2nd meeting when i read this chap for the first time LMFAOOO
It was at that moment vey knew they were getting a truck load of sandduo--
I had also already forgotten that Phil had told Wilbur he was gonna show him smth lmfaooo
I am starting to get tired fr (it's been almost an hour Oops) so i think i will pull a spruce and split this into two parts and continue after some breakfast or smth LMAOO (pst gang ftw 👆)
Dudududus away into the sunset
I was definitely debating whether or not to start the chapter with him using wilbur, but it just felt right so I went with it and I'm very happy with the tone it gave because it provided such a good tone shift when phil showed up and wilbur switched back to using 'the pythia'. it's such a fun narrative tool to use, though it's definitely a bit exhausting to remember every time i refer to wilbur in narration i'm making a choice with how i refer to him. fun, but a lot to keep in my head
ty I'm so glad my crimeboys feel that distinctive <3
lmao phil was so pissed when they got back. he figured a lot out on his own but wanted to hear it from tommy himself. they really should've told phil about the guy wilbur bumped into tho rip :/
yeah no phil is not wilbur's long lost father or anything. I only think those kinds of twists work in very specific stories, otherwise it just feels like a cheap way to be like "look now these two have a biological reason to care about each other!" and really gives off the vibes of found family being less important than blood family
the thing is regarding wilbur's relationship to clara is that when contrasted with phil's relationship to kristin, i want it to be obvious that it's a two-way relationship. you have to put in what you wanna get out.
LMAO spruce pls share with the class how you split up your asks
ldksjfkl aaa that's so sweet. I love including tiny details like those because I try to make my stories as easy to visualize as possible. I know that when I read something, I want to be able to see the scene perfectly in my head, so I try to emphasize the facial expressions and body language and the setting they're in and all that to really immerse the reader in it
tysm i'm so glad you enjoyed!
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wishbonewitch · 10 months
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Lore's Ghost Experiences:
a thread 🧵 as in i'll keep adding as i experience more~
when i was around 14 or 15, i was at a church that use to be a funeral home, surrounded on all sides by graves. i didnt believe in god by that point and was only there to explore the graveyard and hang out with my friends who were christian. well, i was alone in the youth room while my friends were doing something else in another room. i had on noise canceling headphones on and loud ass music blasting. the room had three doors on three different walls, i had turned to face the wall without a door while humming to the music. i suddenly felt a presence behind me, you know that feeling when someone walks up behind you. i thought it was my friends so i started to take the headphones off and turned around. as i faced the door directly behind me, a tall black figure rushed at me and passed through me. i screamed and fell. it felt like it pushed me down. the headphones slid across the floor. i looked around in confusion and felt... idk. i felt like it took a piece of me. my friends ran in and helped me up and asked what happened. when i told them, the one whos dad was the pastor said that there were spirits here and theres a black shadow. it had only been seen in fleeting glances until now but everyone felt like it wasnt friendly. after that, a medium and seer friend i had told me out of nowhere that i had a shadow that wasnt mine following me and it was covering my aura. since then, ive been working to rid myself of this and get whatever it took from me back. i dont know what it is exactly or why it did that to me. i dont know the extent of the damage it has done to me either. but i know that i will never forget seeing it and the feeling of being passed through. it felt like my insides got covered with thick ink.
(any fellow witches feel free to please let me know what you think this being was. dont just say demon please, i dont believe in pure good or bad like that. and i dont believe in christian interpretations of demons and angels. thank you for your advice!)
i was again at the funeral home church. i saw one of the good ghosts clearly. i was waiting by the front door for a friend. next to that door is an office of my friends mom. i saw movement from my side vision and turned my head. CLEAR AS DAY, i saw legs covered by blue jeans and brown boots walk the rest of the way into the office, the body was already in the threshold. i thought it was my friends mom so i went to the door to ask where my friend was. noone was in there. i stood there looking like an idiot when my friends mom did appear behind me and asked whats up? she was wearing a dress with flats. i asked for my friend and she told me she was in the youth room. the mom went into her office and closed the door. chills!
my house is haunted. none of the spirits are malevolent, at least not anymore. one of them, a man, lives in my room, in my closet. he sometimes wakes me up if i oversleep. the most vivid way he has was, i woke up to my alarm but turned it and all my others off. about five minutes of light dozing later, i hear a very clear audible "hey!" right in my ear. my back was facing the closet. i jumped up and said "im up!" as though someone was in my room. i looked around and didnt feel fear or confusion. i just felt thankful. i got up for the day after that. i have visual hypopompic (while waking) hallucinations but i dont have audible ones. and i dont have hallucinations while fully awake, audible or visual.
im not sure what this was... i was in my room chilling when i felt my house shaking. my first thought was something is outside. cause my area doesnt get earthquakes at all. it was bright and sunny outside. i move my curtain and look out the window and see a FUCKING PLANE. close enough i can see the windows and lights and writing on the side!! it was close enough that it shouldve scraped my backyard tree!! it was going down too and the area is wouldve landed had a house and a HUGE forest! but when i went to check. nothing?? and noone else saw the plane! i still cannot explain wtf that was. there arent any plane crashes in my area either.. i know it wasnt a hallucination tho cause i heard the engines and it shook the whole house and my cats were hiding cause they got scared by the noise.
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