#but at the same time i don't wanna like. be a dick lmao. also i need money

[ybcpatrick]

[chrollohearttags]

Requests open? You don't know what you unleashed

It's that time of the month and I've been craving reiner like a mf (side note is it just me or do you crave human touch sm but at the same time the idea of any male rats Ik irl touching me, repulses me)

Anywhooooo if you don't mind the idea of reiner being such a simp for you, showing you sm love and affection stretch marks and all after a rare (inwardly not so rare) day of feeling like shit 🥹

Or reiner throwing you around and slapping you in the face with his dick, I'm easy

(Side side note: I also been having this viral thought of Reiner having a girl And he cheats on her with you constantly, sometimes practically in front of her face, telling you how your better and he will leave her and she can't satisfy him like you can, if you don't like that kind of stuff ignore 🤠)

frennn, omg why are we just alike?! 😭 ovaries be jiggling like a mf, begging to be scrambled but I wouldn’t dream of letting those creatures near me. but ask and you shall receive! 🫶🏾 I literally love allllll of these so much, I have no idea which one to choose. I can’t stop thinking about, him more so than usual slsksks 😫😭 so ykw, we bout to combine all three LMAO! (mainly bc I love the idea of Reiner being a scumbag)

themes + such: infidelity, slight angst, rei is an asshole (not to you! 😭)body worship, pussy eating, reader has stretch marks/slight dysmorphia, body shaming, soft to rough sex, full nelson, daddy’s used, he picks reader up

WHEN SHE’S NOT AROUND

“Rei…wait, we can’t do this..”

“And why not? Who’s going to stop us?”

“No one and that’s the problem..”

the constant back and forth between two lovers, ensued among the fray of dishevelment and lust..lust that had driven you both to the point of no return. Truth be told, you had no good reason to be together. Nothing good would come of this in the long run and yet, here you were…lying in the bed of another woman, with her man’s hands roaming your body. His lips latched onto your nipples and his fingers plunged deep into your aching center. Riding them to bliss as you cried out his name; echoing the walls of her home..it was a disgrace and yet, you couldn’t pull away. You couldn’t let him go..and he felt the same.

“Please..don’t try to pretend like you actually give a shit about her..” His voice seemingly mocking you..it certainly wasn’t his normal demeanor but the one thing you had come to accept about Reiner is that he was not perfect. Not by a long shot…he was certainly not some perfect gentleman that checked all of the boxes. He was handsome, successful, alluring, one hell of a lover but he wasn’t yours!..not even close. That much signified by the silver band on his right ring finger. Married to the girl you despised more than anything. You’d never hated anyone in your entire life but that snooty little blonde bitch was a shoe in for the first spot. Make no mistake, you weren’t afraid of her; more so she was intimidated by you and the thought of fucking her husband unbeknownst gave you a thrill like none other. But your conscious was heavy with thoughts of karma..how things would play out for you guys in the long run..what if he decided that one day he no longer wanted you and by some weird circumstance, decides to make it work with his wife? You’d be out and no one could feel an ounce of pity. You were the adulterer, the harlot, the side chick, mistress..but you were the only one he wanted.

“..because I don’t. Matter of fact, I hope she walks in here right now. I wanna see her face while I’m fucking you..” the deep tone in his voice rattling off into a laugh. Suddenly, he’d tug those thick digits out and shove them between your lips. Allowing you to pacify and taste yourself…watching you become so salacious for him never grew old and it wasn’t something he was ready to let go of. Not now and not ever!..meanwhile, he’d kneel to the floor, caressing your thick thighs in an attempt to quell you. “Did I tell you how beautiful you look today? Hmm?…I feel like you should know that..” that deep southern drawl feeding you those sweet nothings, curling your toes at the sound. He could stay here forever, with you and no one else. Staring into the warmth of those beautiful brown eyes...the truth was, you hadn’t been feeling your best. You worked in the same building as his girl and as one of the lead makeup artists, for the brand that she and many other modeled for, it was difficult seeing women that looked nothing like you garner all of the attention and praise. Not to mention, hearing their snide remarks on the slick about your body type..about how you and others were not a fit for the pieces; literally and figuratively. You were used to it..working in the upper echelon came with discrimination on at least five different levels. But you let it roll off of your back. However, you were having a rather off day. Honestly, the last thing you wanted to do was to be weighed down with the tension of knowing you were sleeping with someone else’s man. That was until you were gifted an anonymous bouquet of flowers..you had no question who the sender was and when he sent you a text message asking to see you, you were glad to accept. Now here you were being spoiled in more ways than one. “You know I love you too, right? You’re my everything..” “Yes, Rei..I love you too..”

Currently, his lips were latching onto your clit, hands firmly planted on your thighs and clawing into them. He needed to taste you..consume your scent and flavor until he was full. That’s the way it was with Reiner..he was a selfish man. Downright gluttonous and he’d have his cake and devour it too! “Good…because I don’t want you to take it personal when I fuck you like a whore tonight.” Smirking up at you and causing you to chew at your lip with a wide smile. Just then, he’d toss your leg across his shoulder and begin the rapid ascent into feasting on your cunt. It wasn’t long before those juices were trickling down his chin and you were trembling. You could’ve jumped from your own flesh at any minute. The way his tongue lapped at your bud, delicately navigated your folds..prodded your entrance..no one treated you better. Hence why his wife would simply have to share. “Oh fuck!…yes, Rei..right there..”

he knew that you were exactly where he wanted you..and there was no way he was letting you go until he got what he desired….suddenly, he’d pull away with his mouth only to quickly substitute your pleasure with his fingers whilst he spoke to you. Feeding you every positive affirmation he could think of…complimenting your beautiful smile down to your legs; rubbing them gently. He didn’t just admire you, he practically worshipped you. Leaving kisses on those stretch marks displayed across your pudgy tummy. He loved all of it and thought that you should do the same. He was adamant in letting you know there was nothing for you to be ashamed of. “You’re so fucking sexy. Trust me..she’s not even half the woman you are. Never could be, baby. The next time she says something, just think about the fact that you have the one thing she doesn’t..” he’d declare, proceeding to spit onto your folds and continue licking. Not once did he break eye contact because he wanted to see all of the expressions that came across your face..he was right. She’d brag and boast about her husband who loved her so much to anyone who’d listen. That was at least in the public eye..however, behind the closed doors of a dressing room, crying into the arms of her best friend, she’d confess that he hadn’t touched her in months. That he seemed distant and cold and she was worried about an affair. Your kind nature couldn’t bear harboring such a secret but the side of you that wanted revenge for watching that bully’s abuse to other girls; bragging about her appearance, wealth and everything else she could flaunt as an adolescent, up into adult hood…you were enjoying this. You wanted the bitch to suffer and quite frankly, see her man getting fucked by the very type of woman she swore she was superior to!

“Lay back f’r me, sweetheart and put those fucking legs up..”

By this point, Reiner’s entire demeanor had seemed to shift. He was still very much hungry for that delicious nectar but he was done with the sweet, charming, innocent demeanor. Quite frankly, it couldn’t come soon enough. You needed him to take what was his! To be dominant, aggressive and pound every single ounce of tension from your body. You were sopping wet with a linear trail of slick, seeping down your slit and he had just the plan to add to the mess. Quickly standing to his feet, he’d take the place of your palms and squeeze the supple flesh of your thighs..he’d already previously undressed so when he came up, that erect cock did along with it as well. He was aching for you..so much so, the only way he’d be able to gain relief was to bury himself inside of you. That’s when you’d feel him lob a trail of spit onto your folds before rubbing that tip against you…you couldn’t handle another moment of being teased so luckily…

“You’re about to get all of this dick, I hope you know that..”

“You say that like it’s a bad thing…take this pussy. Fuck me..”

..he didn’t make you wait long! A moment later, you’d feel that tip split open your folds and enter your warmth. It felt damn near divine being inside of you. He practically trembled; cursing aloud when he was met with the sensation of your walls constricting around him. This was all he wanted, all he needed and he’d be content as long as he could have you. “This pussy’s so fucking tight…goddamn, she never feels this good.” Chuckling to himself because he couldn’t believe just how starkly different his experience was with you and his wife. Oftentimes, he found himself bored or not even remotely aroused. She’d complain that it was too much or that she couldn’t fit it all the way. She didn’t like to do any of the nasty things you preferred and when it came to giving him oral sex, she downright refused. Just recently, he stopped trying altogether and always claimed he was too exhausted for sex. Meanwhile, he was buried balls deep inside of you every chance he got!

“Mmmmph, take it, baby. Keep fucking me, just like that..”

Whimpering as you rubbed your clit..stroking that bud slowly..your gaze was fixated on his, a smile on both of your faces as he nestled every inch into you. His strokes were consistent, deep and a little fast. He couldn’t be vexed to take it slow tonight. He needed to give it to you the way you deserved. “Who’s pussy is this, baby? Huh? Tell me..” questioning as he grasped for your ankles, placing gentle kisses along your instep and growling into your skin. He wasn’t letting up for anything. Not until he was damn well satisfied..

“Y-yours, daddy. Oh my gosh..”

crying out with a frail whimper as his pace sped up. Chewing at your bottom lip, you’d push at his abs to feign him off but that only did more to fuel his desire to wreck you. Instead, you found yourself hoisted up mid air and cradled in his huge arms. Being propelled up and down on his cock as he slammed you down onto it. Reiner was a brick house of a man, courtesy of all the years he spent playing football. With the bank account to match. By all accounts, he lived the dream life that so many sought after…millions in his account, large, picturesque home and a model wife but the one thing that alluded him…the one person he desired most was right here.

“Fuck….it should’ve been you, baby. It was always supposed to be you. You’re the one that should be wearing that ring, my last name..you should have her life.”

his words becoming far more enunciated, filled with much more passion and aggression..he craved you so badly he could feel it every fiber of his soul. He’d do anything to keep you around..no matter the cost. Clawing into his back, (y/n) cried out his name and let him know that you mirrored his sentiments and that regardless of titles, rings or legalities, he belonged to you! The only one who’d truly ever love him..

“I’m not going anywhere, I promise..”

[starfxkr]

Now that we have opened the door to lamb reader I wanna ask about the girls kinks like shared I am sure they all like a little bit of pet play to varying degrees but also their individual kinks too I feel like lamb would be the nastiest being down for everything "wanna cum in my food and have me drink/eat it okayy"

okay individual kinks!!!

kitten - predator/prey kink for sure. she likes when jj chases her around like he's gonna hurt her. which adds to her gun kink/knife kink she just likes being scared it's so strange. because jj likes to scare her since he's rarely in that position. she's also a perpetually sleepy girl so somno for sure there's nothing she loves more than waking up to jj getting ready to fuck her. realized she liked bondage after helping jj with different fishing knots and it made her weird. omorashi kink for sure because once jj wasn't listening when she said she had to pee and she ended up liking it :/. also likes gagging on his dick until it feels like she may puke. once joked her so hard she passed out while they were play wrestling and she woke up giggling. has a crazy breeding kink. also has a daddy kink but won't admit to it.

bunny - has a dumbification but strictly while fucking, she sinks into subspace the second easiest. daddy kink out the fuckin wazoo. like it gets real Freudian real fast. she gets off on herself too honestly, she likes to watch herself masturbate or if she's fucking rafe in the mirror she's looking at her more than him. breeding kink but doesn't actually wanna get pregnant yet. very into public sex she has no shame about it at alllll. don't know the exact name of it but she loves when it feels like she's gotta coerce rafe into fucking her. like yes he's bigger and more imposing but he'll refuse to touch her so she become petulant and demanding that's her favorite game.

foxy - exhibitionist!!! she fucks in public all the time and she's almost gotten caught with pope many times. proud sapiosexual she was feeling the fuck outta that nerd y'all im so serious. kinda has a corruption kink where she's corrupting pope. very very mild sadism she likes to tease pope for being so into her. is into choking. she is the choker. tied as themost into dry humping with pup because she likes laughing at pope!!! she's actually a very sick girl like what is her problem LMAO

puppy - breeding kink so bad she's had a couple scares. voyeurism I think she's a weirdo who likes to watch john b without doing anything she's just obsessed with him. daddy kink for sure but probably the mildest one!!!. likes being taken care of not dumbification per say but when she's able to shut her brain off and let john b handle things. really really into dry humping she prefers it to sex sometimes it drives him absolutely insane

lamb - lots of weird religious shit. she used to hump her pillow staring straight into jesus's eyes now she humps her man doing the same thing. I agree about the cum eating when you're raised on "this is my flesh this is my blood" it makes you weird. has a humiliation kink she likes the feeling of shame that comes with sex. unintentional worship kink she views blowjobs the same as praying bc she's on her knees anyways. likes being spit on. tentatively likes being choked but doesnt know how to go about it. loves to be smacked/spanked she used to get in trouble in Sunday school on purpose because it made her feel like someone cared enough to correct her behavior. likes orgasm denial because she used to never be able to actually cum so she's learned to like the feeling of just simmering in it

[hoshigray]

Back at it with pt. ii of the assassin duo! Toji x reader (finally!!): where the reader avoids Toji after the one-night stand, and it goes well for the most part. But can the same be said for Toji? How long can this quiet game go before someone snaps?

A/n: Am I writing this because I'm spitful of getting a community label on my sugar daddy! Toji x sugar baby! reader fic? Yes. Yes, I am. 🙃 Sighhh. But ya know what, it's all good because you lovelies gave it so much love, so tysm for 3k notes!!! And thank you so much for the 300+ followers!! Y'all are too kind~~~ Since I have no idea how to celebrate, I guess another poll will suffice so pick whichever prompt you'd like to see for next Thursday (as well as a bonus art from me hehe)!!!

Also, for context's sake, this is pt. ii of this drabble that I have written, so please give it a read if you ever feel confused. This fic was long overdue and is WAY longer than I EVER intended for it to be, so I apologize for this hefty piece of work. I do hope you like it tho!!

Also, also: @absoluteindulgence here ya go!! just as I promised ccc:

Cw: dom! Toji x fem! reader - fingering (fem! receiving) - Toji gets a bit possessive/jealous - sex in a public place (workplace) - biting - clitoral play (pinches 2x) - Toji is his coky self but reader doesn't back down - implied overstimulation (fem! receiving) - pet names (angel, angel face, baby, darlin', good girl, honey, sweetie, sweetheart, sweet thing) - third party interruptions (they don't walk in on you two doing the deed tho) - kissing session - edging (fem! receiving) - Toji steals your panties bc he's a cheeky asshat - ayoo Toji and reader catching feelings.

Wc: 5.1k (omfg I'm so sorry y'all lmao)

The last time you ran into Toji was the "I'll treat you for dinner with nothing attached" mishap you got yourself into. How can you not ridicule yourself for getting caught in such a moment? The man you hate with every fiber in your being practically had you folded like a pretzel, chuckling and teasing you in your most vulnerable state as he used your body in his way fit.

The most unpleasant thing about it was you reminiscing about those intimate moments you had with him that night. When his hot groans made you squeeze tighter on his dick. His thick fingers in your mouth play with your tongue as he kisses the nape of your neck from the back. When you hold him for support while he pounds into your wet folds, the naughty sounds make you bury your face into the crook of his neck.

Or worse: as Toji had his way with you, he called you the sweetest names as if he truly meant them, like he wouldn't mind calling you by them for the rest of his days.

Images of that night continue to haunt you, especially within the confines of your own home, in your own bed. How many nights has it been since you've fought the urge to touch yourself and failed? Losing count says quite a lot.

"Hnngh, shit shit shit...Fuck, y/n, you don't know what you're doing to me, baby." His voice is present in your mind as your fingers rub your clit. You shut your eyes close once you enter a digit inside your opening. "Awwh, are you embarrassed, angel? Don't wanna look me in the eye? No? Heh, then what are you grippin' 'round me for..." Another digit enters between your folds, and you grip your bedsheets while the memories still play in your head. "Damn, sweetie, lookin' so beautiful fr' me, ya know that?" Faster and faster your fingers go, your sensitivity inching higher and higher. "My beautiful darlin'."

And then you release. Cum slides down your inner thighs as your legs shake, your dignity and shame staining the dry sheets.

Damn you, Toji Fushiguro. Through gritted teeth and tears swelling up, you swear to not get mixed with that man from here on out.

And you do just that. Anytime you saw him within the same corridor or room, you would ghost him as if his familiar tall, solid build could never catch your eye. You'd go on about your business, onto the next task, onto the next client.

You didn't even take his missions anymore, nor did he for yours. Everything was going back to where it was before this incident of yours. As if you two never acknowledged each other in the first place.

It was for the best, at least that's what you told yourself. You had to get back to who you were previously, whether that meant being the top assassin or not. Whichever came first, as long as you were nowhere near him.

As for Toji, he could tell what game you were playing the moment your eyes no longer gave him the time of day. And Toji wasn't mad at it either; he preferred the "no feelings attached" approach. So he did his part to not get mixed into whatever you were doing, missions and all.

But as much Toji tries not to, he can't stop thinking about you. The way your hips sway when you walk past him, your voice soft yet stern when conversing with your handler, and when you check your small hands to see if you adequately cleaned off the blood from the mission prior.

His mind can only think of your wrists trapped under his single hand while he stuffs his fingers into your mouth with the other. Your legs and ass tremble as you ride him. Doing your best not to be too loud, but oh, Toji wants you loud. He wants you to let him know he's making you mewl and shriek, not giving a damn if the whole world knows as well. "Haaah—Ahhh!! T-Toji, please...I'm gonna cum, if you keep—Ohhh!"

Hearing you, kissing you, holding you, all of it. All of you. If he could have you close to him, he'd be as swift as a blink of an eye.

But again, he preferred this way. Less trouble, more work.

And it was going pretty alright.

Well, until you start going on missions with other hitmen.

Although your diligent work ethic and astute experience led you to the top, you've also gained respect and admiration from your colleagues, especially your junior subordinates.

And now that you seemed to stop associating yourself with Toji, some of the other guys tried to use this to their advantage to get closer to you and request your aid for some of their tasks.

And who are you to say no to helping others who wish to improve? There's no wrong in doing so.

Except there is a wrong. Its name is Toji Fushiguro, and the last straw was when he saw one of the juniors try to take you out to dinner (to which you declined, of course). He needed to stop this before some poor rookie's head decorated some walls.

⋆⁺｡˚⋆˙‧₊✩₊‧˙⋆˚｡⁺⋆

Another day goes by, and you go down the hallway from a meeting with your handler, only to see Toji leaning on a wall. You've done this dance several times now. Just keep walking. You walk past him like nothing, easy peasy. Now onto the next task and go see-

"Y/n."

You stop in your tracks when someone calls out to you. No, you know who it was that said your name. It's been a while since you've heard his husky voice. You sigh and continue walking.

Toji's brows furrow. Unless you were seeing things he wasn't, you two were obviously the only people in this hall. Stopping at the sound of his voice is evidence that you're aware of his existence. Yet you move right along.

That's strike one.

He gets up from the wall and follows behind you. Toji stares at your figure, and he knows you can sense him. He huffs, cursing you that you got him following you like some lovestruck schoolboy.

"Y/n." He tries it again.

You didn't stop this time, your face in the direction you were heading.

That's strike two.

Toji sucks his teeth. Now this is getting annoying. He takes five giant steps and places his hand on your shoulder, gripping it so you can stop at that spot. "Yo!!" He doesn't bother hiding his irritation.

"Hey!"

You free your shoulder from his hand in a swift motion, smacking his arm away. It was a small action, but it gave you enough leeway to hop a few extra meters away from him.

However, Toji was way quicker than that.

He grabs and pins you onto the wall of the hallway corner. You wince as the pain is slight, yet nothing too life-threatening. But that can't be said for the look Toji was giving you. Black brows are pulled down, and his forest-green eyes affirm that he's livid.

Strike three it is.

"I fucking dare you to try and get yourself out of this one," His rough hands are now on your shoulders, but they're keeping you in one place this time. "Try it."

A displeased frown paints your face. "Oh? Are you challenging me? I thought you'd have half the brain to know that's not a good idea."

He sneers at your attempt at sounding threatening. It always worked with others, but never with him. He found you adorable for always trying. "Hmph, your sassy mouth loves to spit out venom," Toji leans his face in, his nose almost touching yours. "Thought I fucked that attitude right out of ya."

You bring a knee to his groin, but again, Toji is one step ahead. Grabbing your leg and pulling it up with one hand while he uses the other to hold your wrists above your head.

Your eyes widen. This position, the memories, it's all coming back to you.

Pull yourself together, damn it!

"Tch, what is this about now, you reckless bear?" You glare at the man, trying to stay calm in this predicament.

"I'm fine playing the avoiding game—"

"You don't seem fine about it now." You cut him off.

"I wonder who's to blame for that."

"What the hell did I do? I carried on with my work and left you alone. Everything was going back to how it used to—"

"I don't think you avoiding me and going on other missions with other guys used to happen."

How you fought the urge to roll your eyes amazed you. "What are you, an elementary schooler? Why does it matter to you what I do with my time?"

"Shut up. You know I've been in this field longer than you have, and when you came into the picture, you always chose to be alone."

"Again," your patience wears thin by the second. "Why does it matter to you?"

Silence. He just stares at you as anger dwindles out bit by bit, but he's in his thoughts as his eyes hone in on yours.

"Well?" You press on while he's stumped. "Why?"

No answer, averting his eyes to the side like he'd find the answer there. Then, they come back to your face. Or rather, your lips.

Your breath hitches. "Fushiguro?"

His emerald eyes return to yours, yet his irritation is clouded in a softer tone. Those eyes now express the hooded look from that night. Toji places your leg onto his shoulder and leans closer to you.

"Fushigu—"

"Shhh," His deep voice sounded more demanding when hushed. "Let me have this. Have you."

His lips press onto yours before you deny him. Toji finally frees your hands to cup your face, and his tongue runs through your teeth, waiting for permission to enter. You should be fighting this. You have to fight it. But your mouth opens for him, and your hands grab his shoulders for stability.

You moan sweetly when he slides his tongue into yours, your balance starting to fail you. "I'm still on one leg, you asshole." You manage to say in-between kisses.

Toji laughs a bit before changing your position, pressing your back against the wall with your legs wrapped around him. Once you're comfortable, he's back on attacking your lips. It gets rougher and more passionate, teeth clashing and biting your bottom lip.

He groans when a hand pulls on his hair, his hands grope on your ass lovingly. He breaks up the kiss, you two catching your breath. He gazes at you, "You too, huh?"

Your lips quiver when you turn away from him and nod. He snickers. "Look at you being all shy. You were talking with a lot of sass not too long ago, and now you can barely look at me." He draws his face closer to your neck, giving it sweet kisses and tiny bites that cause you to gasp. And Toji was enjoying your reactions. "Knowing that I'm the one that can make you like this — Mmmph, makes me want to fuck you here and now."

And that's what you want. You won't admit it, but he already knows that. The cooperation with him at this very moment proves it. You want him just as much as he does you.

"Y/n! Where are you?"

The two of you freeze when another voice comes from the other side of the hall. Then you remember a rookie who needed help with a mission today, and you were headed to see him right after your meeting. And now you're pressed between a wall and Toji fucking Fushiguro with your legs wrapped around his waist.

If he sees me like this with Fushiguro, I'm finished!

"T-Toji," your whisper grabs the older man's attention. "You have to put me down. They're waiting for me."

Toji squints at you and then a look of realization. The grin that creeps on his face alerts something in your brain, and you don't know if you like it or not. There's little time for you to come to a proper answer because Toji moves away from the wall and brings you along for the ride. Your arms hold around his neck so you don't fall off as he enters a room and locks the door.

You're now in a tiny conference room with the lights off, only the sunlight peeking through the blinds of the sole window in front of the round table.

"What are you doing, Fushigur—Ack!" Toji throws you onto the table. The pain from your head distracts you from the fact that he's pulling your pants off in immediate haste.

His chuckles sound dangerously low. "So you thought I'd just let you go on some mission when I already have you right where I want you?" Toji spreads your legs for your undergarments to be displayed, whistling at the lewd image of a damp spot on the piece of clothing. "Oh, sweetheart, not with these cute lil' panties of yours."

You were about to get up and grab for his neck, but a finger pushed into your pussy through the cloth. A squeal slips out, and you're quick to cover your mouth.

"Careful, princess," his big hands pull your panties off you, and they meet the cold floor. His middle and forefinger slide up and down between slick-coated cunt has you biting your lip, and Toji likes the determination. "Don't want whoever lookin' for you to walk in on us. This pussy is for my eyes to see only."

"Haaaah...You're such a bastard, Fushiguro—Ooohh!!" Toji pushes his finger into your clothed opening, his free hand coming in the clutch to cover your voice.

Toji leans close to your face with the vibrations of your mewls rippling through his palm while his thick digit plays with your slit. "I mean it, kid. Don't play with me." You nod meekly, and he kisses your forehead for your obedience.

"Hmm, I wonder where y/n went. Hopefully, they didn't forget..." You can hear the voice of your subordinate on the other side of the door as if he's directly in front of it.

Another finger is added into the mix, and tears start to form as you wince through the pain of your nether lips being stretched. You try calling out to Toji, yet it's no use with his big warm hand dwarfing your sobs.

He does remove it, though, using it to maneuver your head so he can lay kisses on your neck. Your choked hiccups sound like sweet notes to his ears. "So good fr' me, sweetie. You smell so fuckin' good. Who're you trying to pull?"

"No-No one...Ahhhh..." You answer in gasps while his digits scrape your inner walls, your mind turning to mush. "I'm not trying anything— Oh fuck..."

"Bullshit." Toji groans and bites your collarbone, and a sharp gasp leaves you. "All this attention, all these rookies gawkin' at you like you're their prize."

"Why? You jealous, Fushiguro?" It wasn't meant to be a snarky comment, yet there was some spice. The glare he gives you sends a chill down your spine. One is sent back to show that you're standing your ground despite the humiliation you're going through.

You're about to say some more; however, you hear the doorknob jolt, and the clench of your velvety walls around Toji's fingers doesn't go past him.

"Huh? Why's the door locked?"

The shock on your face lights a lightbulb for Toji as a big grin takes over him. "Yeah? This space is occupied." He calls out to the person behind the door, the petrified look on your face only fueling his mischievous fire.

"Oh shit, Mr. Fushiguro!?" He snickers at the other's response. "S-Sorry! I didn't mean to disrupt you! I was just looking for someone."

A brow is raised when Toji turns his head to the door. "Who?"

You send your knife-piercing eyes his way, but he still doesn't face you. This motherfucker...

"Y/n," the rookie replies sheepishly. "They said they'd help me and a partner of mine with a mission. But I haven't seen them for a while..."

Please don't ask where I am. Just go somewhere else—Oh God!!

Toji's fingers fasten the pace, and you quickly cover your mouth before the person, oblivious to your absence, gets any inclination of where you are. And it gets worse when Toji's thumb flicks your clit prompting a choked cry. Oh, he's such a cruel man.

Toji hums with a sly smile as he peers at your writhing figure. "Oh, really? Didn't know that."

"By any chance, do you know where they went?"

You can't vocally tell him anything, so you rely on your eyes to convey your anxious pleas, orbs begging him through streamed tears and hooded with shame.

But Toji won't let you off that easily because the fun has just started. He whispers, "Say my name, baby." You blink with scrunched brows. "Say my name like you did that night."

This is too fucking much for me! Your mind is going through waves of turbulence. Of all people to be in this situation with, it has to be the fucker getting a kick out of this!!

Before you think up another sentence, a stinging sensation jolts your body upwards to him. Toji sneers playfully as his fingers leave your soaked folds and pinch your clitoris, your reaction too adorable for him to not stop tormenting you. "C'mon, sweetheart, say my name with your cute ass voice."

Your mind is clouded in this euphoric atmosphere that you can feel the climax inching closer and closer. Your lips are now swollen from having to bite them constantly. Another pinch has you screaming in silence, and you're pushed to accept your fate and give him what he wants: your submission.

"Hic-T-Toji, please," eyes hooded in a fuzzy haze, you reach out for his face. He obliges as you caress his cheeks. "Too much, 's too —hic... too much..."

His jade orbs focus on your dazed expression. A smile pushes his scar up for his teeth to peek through. "There she is. That's my good girl." He draws in to kiss you, his body weight pushing you down on the cold table surface. However, a knock from the door behind him halts him from moving any further. Toji clicks his teeth. Fuckin' brat.

And he removes himself from you, especially his fingers that were warm inside your cunt. The sudden subtraction of them have you exclaiming in soft whimpers. The orgasm you were so close to achieving is ignored and slowly depletes. You feel as though you could cry through the sensitive.

Toji whispers a quick apology and licks his digits marinated with your fluid. Then he marches to the door and opens it enough for half of his body to be visible. The rookie jumps at the tall man looking at the other with the most terrifying scowl. "What?" His gruff voice carries authority, and your pussy throbs as you watch him handle the younger hitman.

"S-Sorry, sir! I asked if you've seen—"

"No, I haven't seen them. Why not ask their handler since they just had a meeting together."

"Oh, okay...Well, excuse me!" Your junior quickly bows at the intimidating senior and scampers out of the scene.

A heavy sigh leaves Toji as he closes and locks the door, "Fuckin' finally." The exasperated tone of his tone falters when he turns to you, replaced with the returning lust. "Now, where were we..." His hands undo the knot around his pants and loosen the hold around his hips.

When his dick is set free, you can't help but gawk at such a thing. Seeing it for the second time is just as — if not more — menacing as the first. The girth and size alone has your mind in a whirlwind, questioning how that even fit inside you in the first place.

Nevertheless, it's no use thinking about such matters because Toji aligns his cock around your folds. When he feels you tense at his veiny organ, he rubs your thighs tenderly to coax you. "Relax fr' me, angel." Hesitation is shown as you nod, but you even your breathing and prepare for him.

Toji pushes his length into you with every breath you take, and it's difficult to adjust to the foreign organ intruding into your poor hole. You grimace every time the tip is shoved against you. Tears finally fall down your face which are wiped by Toji's calloused fingers. "I know, honey, I know."

It feels like forever just having the tip of Toji's dick enter you, and when it does, oh, it does. A loud gasp exits your lips from the intrusion, and inaudible babbles fly out as he pushes his length, stretching your vulva as it ventures deep within you.

Toji, on the other hand, shivers as your inner walls clamp around his cock. "Jesus...This pussy is still so fuckin' tight." He hisses through gnashed teeth. Once the base of his member reaches your opening, you two take a moment to recollect yourselves.

"Hmmm, damn, I missed this." He grinds his hips into you, his hands posted on your hips to savor the clenching feeling of your pussy. "Heh, bet that brat of a subordinate wouldn't know how to handle you like I do."

Even with your mind foggy and senses at an all-time high, you give the older man a look of annoyance. You make your cunt squeeze hard on him, the unexpected action catching him by surprise as he lowers himself to you, using all his willpower not to cum so early.

Before he can curse you out for the unforeseen kegel, you cup his face to have him look at you. "For God's sake, can you not mention him while you're fucking me, Toji?" Your voice hushed for him to pay close attention, but your beautiful dazed expression distracts him. "I'm not thinking about anyone besides you."

You don't even give him a chance to his answer because you pull him into a kiss and moan sweetly into his mouth. He groans and slowly rocks his hips into a stable rhythm.

His thrusts gradually get faster and faster, rearranging your legs around his waist so you don't go sliding on the table surface. Your pants get sporadic, and your cries are a little louder than earlier. But not too loud for the whole building to hear, only for him.

The slap of his balls hitting your ass is so vulgar to the ears that you hide your face. "Cut that out, sweetheart," Toji wastes no time removing your hands and holds them down with his. A feeling of deja vu blossoms in the air. "Don't try hidin' away from me, baby. I want to see all of you."

A sudden burst of confidence fuels your sentence. "Then fuck me like you deserve all of me."

A fire is ignited in Toji, and a sudden deep thrust is thrown at you out of nowhere. Your sobs only propel him to continue piston his length into the deepest parts of your gummy walls.

The conference room is filled with nothing but the sound of your sexes smacking together, skin slapping against each other, and groans and moans in heavy puffs and pants.

"Haahh! Haaaaah!! Tojiii, Tojiiii," you whimper as his pumps go erratically fast, shivering beneath him as your legs cage him.

"Oh fuckin' shit," Toji curses with eyes shut, removing one hand from yours and snaking it down to your clit, using his fingers to press down on the sensitive bud.

Your orgasm climbs back up, and you want to claim it this time. "Toji, 'm gonna, gonna c—Ohhh!!"

"Yeah? Gonna cum for me, sweet thing? Gonna cum on my dick like the good girl you are?" You nod lazily. Toji doesn't buy it. "Use your words, baby. Is that what you want?"

"Yes, Toji, yes!! Please, I want it!!"

And he gives it to you as the pads of his fingers swipe on your bud rapidly. Your release comes crashing down on you when your cunt spasms around the girthy length. Your eyes roll to the back of your head, and your body jolts with every wave of pleasure.

Toji isn't far from his peak, so he doesn't stop pounding into you for a few seconds. The hilt of his cock slams into your slick-covered opening, and you cry from the impact on your aching chasm. He fills you up with his own come and rests his body on you. His heaving figure feels pleasant on top of you.

The two of you begin to calm down as you finish each other's climax. Toji breathes on the crook of your neck and leaves a trail of kisses. "Fuck, pussy felt way too fuckin' good —kiss— Don't think I'd like the idea of sharin' you with the rest."

You shake your head and chuckle at him, placing your hands behind his neck and playing with his hair. "Whatever you say, you possessive loser."

Toji lifts his head and kisses your forehead before your lips, the two of you indulging in this tender moment as if nothing outside this space matters to you.

That is, until another knock on the door alerts you both, and Toji has to resist the urge to break the table you're lying on. Withdrawing from your embrace, he shouts at the person ruining his time with you. "Look here, brat! I told you this space is occupied!"

"I'm aware. That's why I came to get you." The different voice has Toji realize it wasn't the junior from before but his handler. Shiu Kong? "I was told by some rookie that you were in this room."

Toji groans as he puts his pants back on. For your sake, you keep your mouth shut and let the two men converse through the door between them. "What's up?"

"I just got you into a big operation. The client wants to meet with you to discuss plans and all that fun jazz. So meet with me outside the building whenever you're ready." And with that, Shiu's footsteps falter away from the room.

You finally get up from the table and grab your panties. Or, at least, look in the direction of where your panties should be. Looking to the left? Nope. To the right? Nada. Where did they go?

You hear the click of the door opening, and you run behind an office chair to hide your bare lower body. The culprit was Toji leaving to meet his handler, but what caught your eye was the familiar piece of clothing swirling around his finger. His childish smirk was plastered on his face. "Mind I borrow these for the rest of the day?"

Your face goes hot with unease. "Quit it, Fushiguro! I can feel your cum going down my legs, so hand it over!"

But he doesn't, stuffing the undergarments in his pocket, to your immediate horror. "Nah, I think I'll need 'em, ya know. A lil' motivation for me while I'm gone."

His dumb laugh fills his ego, but it stops when he sees you pick the chair up and throw it at him. He barely escapes as the furniture loudly bangs on the closed door, running away from the scene to meet up with Shiu.

"FUSHIGURO, YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!!"

It's the first time you lose your cool with Toji, and all you can think about in this room of shame and humiliation is why did you get yourself tangled up with the older man again!?

⋆⁺｡˚⋆˙‧₊✩₊‧˙⋆˚｡⁺⋆

"I'm sorry for the sudden disappearance. Something came up on my end, and I had to take care of it immediately."

You found that subordinate later that day and apologized for your abrupt disappearance. They were accepted by the other, who nervously chuckled at your politeness.

"Oh, it's fine, y/n," he scratches his neck and looks to the ground. "I was just worried something happened with you, but I'm sure that wasn't the case since you're so good at what you do!"

You offer a small smile for his compliments, maintaining a calm composure so he doesn't see through the tiny nervous part of yourself. Oh, you don't even know the half of it, junior.

Your smile makes the younger hitman blush, but something catches his eye from behind you. "Huh? Oh, Mr. Fushiguro is back from his mission!"

You perk up at what your peer said, looking in the same direction he was. Shiu Kong was walking up with Toji tailing behind him. You greet Shiu with a brief bow, and he mirrors the action in return.

Once your eyes land on Toji, he's already grinning like a child with a hand rustling in a pocket, and you know what's inside it. "Hey, y/n." His patronizing tone doesn't go overlooked, causing your cheeks to heat up.

Your gaze averts from his cocky demeanor, yet you greet him. "Welcome back, Toji."

The look on the younger hitman across from you displays nothing but perplexity. Even Shiu Kong's brows shoot up with what you said. The junior is the first to say something. "Y/n, y-you just called Mr. Fushiguro by his first name!"

"Yeah, that's a first." Shiu agrees as the cigarette between his lips bounces at every word. "You only refer to him by his last name."

You blink once. You blink twice. And then it finally hits you. Oh shit.

The heat in your cheeks spreads across your face, and your lips lightly tremble as you try to explain yourself. But Toji beats you to the punch as he snakes an arm on your shoulder and brings you close to his chest, resulting in a squeak that your lips fail to suppress. He sneers at the younger man staring at the interaction.

"That's right, y/n and I have gotten pretty close, as you can tell." The grin on his face has a harmless glow, but those sharp emerald eyes of his are shadowed with a dangerous connotation. "After all, she is my special girl." Your subordinate gulps.

Toji snickers, satisfied with the younger hitman taking the hint. He then turns to you, and you do the same. "And as for you, darlin'," He leans in to whisper something in your ear. Something only for you to make your eyes wide and your breath still.

"Next time I see you with this brat, don't think I won't fuck the shit out of you with him watchin'. Show him just how special and good you are fr' me."

[teddybeartoji]

no but…. chuuya who’s never sucked dick before sat on his knees between your legs, staring nervously but hungrily at your hard on. having to coax him in and walk him thru every step while also trying your damndest to not let loose and fuck his throat relentlessly……. IM SORRY

NOWNOWNOWWWWWW THE WAY MY EYES FUCKING POPPED OUT OF MY HEAD WHEN I SAW CHUUYA AND NEVER AND DICKK GOOOD GODDD FLORAA

HE WOULD LOOK. SO CUTE. HDJEJDJDKDJDJDJSJSJDJSJCDJSKGNKDBFBSBGBNSBQJXKSKNEKFS LIKE IMAGINE THE PRETTY BLUSH ON HIS FACE?????????? YOU KNOW HE'D BE BURNING THE FUCK UPP OHHHHHHHINEED HIM AND I NEED HIM BAD.

you tell him to kiss the tip and he just gulps. he's so unsure but at the same time he's so excited???? and he's so determined to be good for you!!!!!!!!!! he presses his lips to your leaking tip while keeping his eyes on you bc he needs to know that he's doing okay, that he's not doing anything wrong. and ohhhhh when he sees your eyes roll back into your head at the slightest touch, his own dick twitches.

but yeah no i don't think he'd really realize how much you're holding bsck lmao. the need to just hear him gag and slobber all over you with tears in his eyes is eating you alive but it's his first time:((((((( you don't wanna scare him:(((( you need to be gentle with him:((((((( but fret not he's the best little student ever though!!!!

also. he definitely cums untouched btw. like the sight of you unraveling right in front of him and from his own mouth and hands is just so fucking hot that he can't help it:(((( he feels very embarrassed abt it too:(((((( but then you're gonna kiss the wet patch on his pants aaaand you're gonna whisper how proud of him you are and then he doesn't feel as bad abt it anymore<33333333

[justarandombrit]

Okay well as you may know from looking at my blog for five seconds, I saw the matinee for Starkid Innit. During the interval and after the show I wrote down some notes. I tried to get them in chronological order but my memory is dogshit and I definitely missed some stuff, I hope you appreciate it though.

Outside:

. EVERYONE SUNG GRANGER DANGER

. IT WAS SO GOOD (except for the high note lmao)

. EVERYONE SUNG DAYS OF SUMMER

. EVERYONE A SMALL GROUP OF PEOPLE SUNG GOIN' BACK TO HOGWARTS

Act 1:

. The Nightmare Time sting punched me in the face

. The shout-out to the confused parents

. BRIAN + MEREDITH IN TGWDLM IS EVERYTHING TO ME

. High School Is Killing Me, Literal Monster and Nerdy Prudes Must Die all got mashed together!

. Corey!Richie is my Roman Empire

. Jaime in NPMD….

. Jaime had a different line to PJ’s original in Literal Monster. I couldn't hear half of it but it was different

. JEFF!MAX

. THE AUDIENCE SINGING RICHIE'S PART!!!!!! I'M NOT A LOSERRRRRRR

. TOGETHER!!!!!

. OUR DOORS ARE OPEN

. Jaime singing Sami/Harry ABOUT HER DOG (Nori)

. The audience whipping out the phone cameras

. CLARK SINGING I WAS GAVE ME SUCH INTENSE CHILLS

. Joey finally giving the white, male side characters attention

. Joey changing “I know I'm not a star” to “I know I'm not Clark”

. He pointed the mic at the audience for the “DEFINITELY NOT!”

. Joey mistimed his jump 😔😔

. Genuinely his best performance of Sidekick yet

. Joey making fun of Brian for not getting a big solo

. Brian kept pretending to beat him up, it was brilliant

. Not Over Yet is definitely Brian's song, shut up

. Brian accidentally singing the same verse twice (How does he always mess this song up?!?!?)

. My mum took a photo during the “EVIL PLAAAAANSSSS” bit and it was right when Brian was choking Joey

. “So look alive and don't forget”

“FORGET WHAT?”

. FEAST OR FAMINE

. Rogues Are We still goes so hard

. Rogues Medley without Kick It Up A Notch is weird, but Kick It Up A Notch without Dylan would definitely be weirder

Intermission:

. Ice cream :D

Act 2:

. Starting with We Got Work To Do is so iconic

. THERE'S BEEN A CHANGE IN THE CLIMATE, SOMETHING'S IN THE AIR, WE FEEL THE HEAT, NO NEED TO DEFINE IT, WE DON'T REALLY CARE

. MEREDITH REQUESTED BACK ON TOP!!!!!!!! AND IT WAS SO GOOOOD!!!!!!!

. Joey shouted “Draco, get on the floor!” at Lauren

. ALL THE UNDERRATED SONGS

. I love how it was hyped up like it was going to be Boy Toy, and then just straight up wasn't lmaooo

. Brian finally got the slow, sexy Hideous Creatures (Take that, Nick Lang!)

. Okay I'm trying to remember the order of the underrated songs they did

. Hideous Creatures (Lauren)

. Pays To Be an Animal (Corey) (He didn't sit in the spotlight and someone yelled “TO THE LEFT, COREY”)

. Get In My Mouth (Jeff) (He fully sprawled out on the stage it was hilarious)

. Land of the Dicks (Jaime)

. Hermione Can't Draw (Meredith) (She sung it so well I briefly didn't recognise the song)

. THEY MANAGED TO WORK IN LUPIN / BRIAN CAN'T SING YESSSS

. I genuinely cannot remember what Brian sung

. Gotta Find His Dick (Joey, and eventually everyone)

. The entire “Oh you wanna know where I got my shirt?” bit

. Brian, Jaime and Joey got it from Primark, Meredith got it from “Primed-mrak”, Lauren’s was a family heirloom, Corey got it from Gucci and Jeff got it from America, from Pri-mart (He made the guy on the drums do a baddum tsh)

. COREY SINGING SHOW STOPPIN' NUMBER. OH MY GOD. (The entire crowd joined in, also, Jeff and Jaime as Steve and Stu)

. Everyone cheering so loud when Joey and Lauren came on stage, and them claiming we had no idea what they were going to sing, and it was actually a completely new song (it was Granger Danger obviously)

. And them continuing to claim it was new throughout the song

. As I expected, I almost cried during Not Alone. Also apparently Darren thought it was going to be a big hit??? And just begrudgingly let them use it for A Very Potter Musical

. Super Friends!

. So sad Jeff’s mic was so quiet for “I WANNA BE A MODERN DANCER”

. THEY SUNG WANNABE BY THE SPICE GIRLS

. The fakeout of everyone leaving stage, then the band coming back on and playing the start of Goin' Back To Hogwarts

. “Darren's not here”

“I'LL DO IT”

. THE AUDIENCE DID THE FIRST PART OF GOIN' BACK TO HOGWARTS ALL BY OURSELVES

. JEFF DID DYLAN'S PART (but he didn't do “All of you to [city name] :( )

. Jeff pointed at various parts of the audience for “Welcome hotties, nerds and tools!” and then whispered “I'm so sorry” immediately after

. Singing (/ shouting) Goin' Back To Hogwarts along with hundreds of other Starkid fans was so exhilarating, I loved it and I almost cried (also I'm gonna be so hoarse tomorrow)

[wxnheart]

Hello wonderful author. May I mayhaps request a ghoap + reader NSFW peice please. Maybe one that focuses on how Simon loves to make the reader watch him and Johnny 👉🏽👈🏽, or maybe it's reader taking control and making Ghost watch 👀. Johnny deserves a reward mayhaps.

Lol that one request that was like "mm ghoap" had me thinking things

Also keep up the good work! I like being able to sit back and relax and read your stuff!

𝐏𝐨𝐥𝐲 𝐏𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐳𝐚, 𝐆𝐡𝐨𝐚𝐩𝐰𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐄𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧

...Because who watches the Ghoapwatchers? (the title may or may not have been an excuse to use this. please don't judge me. a lot. lmao)

Simon smoking can mean one of three things: he's anxious and/or pissed, he's just had some good fucking sex, or... he's anxious and/or pissed. And Simon is pissed.

At whom, might you ask? Well, rejoice, baby, because it ain't you this time even though he still wants to chuck that Live, Laugh, Love sign out of the fucking house. No. Simon's ire is reserved for Johnny, your resident killer Golden Retriever, and only Johnny.

And why, might you ask? Well, your cutie patootie lover boy happened to go and get himself hurt on the latest assignment. A routine one, goddamnit. It was unnecessary. Completely and absolutely unnecessary. And un-fucking-acceptable. At least in Simon's eyes.

Johnny argues that it was only a scratch (he's slightly downplaying it) but Simon doesn't give a fuck because only a scratch doesn't cut it. You got hurt, Johnny. End of story. And Simon's anxiety is through the fucking roof right now so a smoke has to suffice. But it doesn't. Nah, not this time.

Simon who puts out the last of his cigarette while staring Johnny down. You don't know what to do so you keep quiet until he tells you to take a seat next to Johnny. You started to protest until a single look made you shut the fuck up.

Simon who straddles Soap. Because what the fuck? Johnny would put up a fight if not for the fact that the bigger man has him pinned down and... oh. Oh shit. Their dicks are aligned. Wait, wait, Lt.—

Simon who starts to slowly grind against Soap's lap, eyes burning holes into the smaller man's. Soap feels the telltale signs of arousal, that fiery pit in his groin, and your eyes widen at what's taking place. Oh, yes. Johnny's about to get fucked silly in a second. You knew from experience.

Soap whose brow furrows the harder he gets and Simon doesn't stop. Knowing the fucker is just as hard as he is and FUCK—"Lt., wait, I—" "What did you tell me, Johnny?" Ghost doesn't stop grinding against him, doesn't do shit but grind and stare meanwhile Soap's falling apart at the seams. If his mind wasn't turning to mush, he'd be pissed but goddamn.

Simon who forbids you from touching yourself because the last thing you're gonna do is get your rocks off alone. You actually do protest this time ("Simon, what the fuck?") and Simon cuts a look at you, the same look he gave Johnny. The same look that tells you he's gonna fuck you just as silly when he's done with lover boy here. Aw, shit.

Soap whose words are lost to his moans and he's well on his way to soaking the crotch of his pants. And Simon doesn't stop. Not at all. Simon continues and it's like he's expecting an answer. "What did you tell me, Johnny?" Ghost emphasizes it with a particularly rough grind this time, enough for Johnny's already sensitive and leaking dick to throb and oh, god, Lt...

"I—shit, I—said I'd be—I said I'd be careful, Lt." Attaboy, soldier. "...Were you careful, Johnny?" The friction is too much. Simon rubs against him faster, puts a little more pressure on him, and it's a miracle he can even talk let alone think at this point. You're biting your lips, wringing your hands because you wanna touch. Yourself, them, it doesn't matter. You wanna touch and suck and fuck and... suck, fuck, and touch some more.

"Were. You. Careful. Johnny?" Punctuated with his hips. Every. Single. Word. And poor, poor Johnny, lost to the lust. Almost close, what the fuck are you doing to him, Lt.? "—NO," he manages to choke out in between gasps and moans and shit, he feels it coming—

—Well, he felt it coming because just as soon as he answered Simon, the mean bastard got up. Got up and left Johnny hard, crotch soaked with precum, and "What the fuck, Lt.?!"

Simon whose stare is both placid and intense; you'd be forgiven for thinking he's nonplussed. Except there's an obvious tent in his pants. Simon who stares you both down before simply saying "Bedroom." And he walks off. He doesn't look back. Doesn't have to. You'll be there. He's got you right where he wants you.

Soap who doesn't miss a beat, grabs your hand, and pulls you alongside him. Right behind Simon. Right to the bedroom. Yeah, it's about to be a long fucking day. And night.

[dr4kenlvr]

𝐁𝐄𝐄𝐏 𝐁𝐄𝐄𝐏 𝐌𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐅𝐔𝐂𝐊𝐄𝐑 !!

feat. mikey sano, draken, baji keisuke, chifuyu matsuno, mitsuya takashi (reader is mentioned here and there too!) - crack/humour/fluff (1.2k+)

nana's note: can toman boys drive cars?? no keep reading to find out about the boys and their driving habits!! spoiler alert: in no way should you drive like them please don't listen to this post LMAO

MIKEY

to mikey, the written test wasn't too bad—he went in, sat in his little cubicle, and got through the questionnaire without too much issue

dude couldn't lie though, he was sweating bullets at the demerit point questions FR

but of course, mikey boasts to everyone (especially baji but we'll get to that later) about his success, and is very excited to hit the road

didn't realize just how small being behind a car wheel feels until he sits and needs to bump the seat up a few notches LMAO

baji teases him: "you need heels on to reach the pedals, too? HAHHAHA"

is constantly driving with an :0 expression

"oh my god, the car is moving ken, im making the car move—ken, look!"

"yes mikey, your foot is on the gas pedal."

cheers when he does a left turn successfully, because fuck are those a pain in the ass sometimes

sometimes forgets to signal, and has been flipped off a few times for almost crashing in front of the car behind him

"oops!"

mikey absolutely has a snack stash in his trunk too—it's filled, and always being refilled, with sweets, savoury treats, and drinks

"y/n, could you grab me a bag of chips please? any flavour!" he yells from the front

???? what ????—you crane your head back to a fucking kitchen of snacks like it's normal for anyone to have that much

occasionally gets extremely tired at the wheel, and shuts his eyes for two seconds at a red light

it's either a honk waking him up or ken profusively cursing at him

"oops!" x2

DRAKEN

now i don't wanna be bias (user dr4kenlvr, am i right), but ken is probably the second best driver on this list

written test wise, he passed on the first try

wasn't too difficult, and the lady at the desk even congratulated him with a warm smile, to which he happily returned

he got use to the mechanisms of the car pretty quickly

all of these gears and switches were like second nature to him, considering how much he works with motorbikes on the regular

likes to play music as he drives, it varies depending on the time of day it is

nice r&b on a night drive is always his favourite though

once draken gets really comfortable with the wheel, he'll have an arm hanging out the window

heavenly sigh—he looks really good <3

never drove alone with just his G1, despite his delinquent reputation

good job ken!!

one thing though: he has an oddly high level of road rage LMFAOOO

draken thinks it's probably because he's in a car—surrounded by 4 walls—rather than being out in the open like on a bike

people can't hear him curse the living hell out of them with the windows up so...

"what the FUCK, ASSHOLE?—CAN'T SEE I'M TRYNA FUCKIN' PASS?"

"SIGNAL NEXT TIME, YOU BITCH."

"ARGHHH—QUIT YOUR HONKING YOU DICK! I HEAR 'YA"

"WHY IS THIS GUY UP MY FUCKING ASS."

yeah, he gets loud LMAOO and vulgar

with his viens popping out and shit, he probably looks crazy if you pull up next to him in the adjacent lane

just don't look over, you'll be okay

HELP

same ken

BAJI

this mf spent months studying for the written test

he was extremely keen on doing well too, because he wanted the luxury of being able to finally drive a car

baji also wanted to be able to drive his mother to and from work, so that she "wouldn't have to take public transit all the time"

love you keisuke

created study nights with chifuyu, where the boys would quiz each other on repetitive shit like signs

"okay, what's this one?"

"uhh.. there's like a merry-go-round ahead?"

"wha—? d'you mean a ROUNDABOUT???"

he had the right spirit, so chifuyu gave him a point either way AHSDHDSHF

time rolled around and baji declared him finally ready to take on the test and..

...he passed!! yay keisuke !!!

dude wanted to explode from the sheer relief, he literally picked you up and spun you around 18 times out of happiness

BUT THIS MF ON THE ROAD IS SO FUCKING WILD—he's good with the wheel, but like there's always something going on in his car

you could get whiplash by how fast he goes sometimes

he doesn't even mean to

50 maximum but he's going 80

"YOU'RE GONNA GET PULLED OVER OR KILL SOMEONE, KEI' SLOW DOWN."

"oH—FUCK, SORRY! sorry!"

also is a huge multitasker - and isn't too shabby at it

he could be calling someone via bluetooth speaker, while eating, while scratching his back, while signalling into the right lane ALL AT ONCE

miraculous how he doesn't have even a scratch or dent yet to be honest

idk man, just make sure you have your seatbelt on at all times, kay'?

CHIFUYU

i think he gets a little too excited every time he gets behind the wheel

like hes giggling with every lane change or right turn

literally fucking SCREAMS when he sees a cat walk on the road

"NOOOOOOOOOOO—"

"chifuyu, it's fine! it walked back. K-KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE ROAD!"

has a cushion specifically for peke j in the back seat where no one can sit or move it to sit

"ahh no. that's peke j's spot, you can sit in the trunk or something."

baji: "are you fucking kidding me."

LMAO

speaking of peke j, he has a component in his trunk filled with toys and cat food for him

it's honestly really sweet, how much he cares and cherishes his little cat

you can't find the heart to be too angry with him when you find cat fur stuck to the seats

i think chifuyu has a lot of fucking fast food garbage in his car too

his mom (and you) is always up his ass about it:

"CLEAN YOUR DAMN GARBAGE MATSUNO. THIS IS A CAR, NOT A LANDFILL."

like, you would sit in the passenger seat and at your feet there's just wrappers and straws and shit

you look at him with a look that just speaks volumes of "really?"

and he's all (｡╹ω╹｡)

it's an honest mistake <3

MITSUYA

oh god—the most responsible driver out of his friends by FAR

he is so so happy when he passes, because he is able to get things done quicker with a car than by walking

dropping/picking up his sisters from school, escorting his mother to places, getting groceries, visiting his friends, just about everything in his life is made 10x easier and faster

mitsuya's car ALWAYS smells good

he's always got a new car freshener hooked onto his rearview mirror when the scent runs out

his favourite is lavender <3 and his sisters like the fruity ones but they make his and your's nose tickle

DRIVES WITH ONE HAND ON YOUR KNEE !!!!!

and he does that fucking cute side smile when he talks to you but also needs to pay attention to the road

AHHH <3

LOVES to bring his sisters on drives around the neighbourhood once he gets his full license

plays their favourite songs and sings out loud with them

it'll be cartoon openings and disney soundtracks but he doesn't mind

not when the grin on your's and his sister's faces are so bright and genuine

omfg - picnics where you two set up food in the trunk and watch luna and mana play at the playground

and they rush over when they're hungry to eat and rest

HOW FUCKING CUTE AND PERFECT

MITSUYA TAKASHI IS PERFECT

taglist: @dai-tsukki-desu @kazuhoya @gwynsapphire @sscarchiyo @reiners-milkbiddies @smileyswifeyy @bontensimp-blog @thisbicc @megumisemo (send me an ask or dm to be added!)

reblogs and comments are very appreciated!

[unclefathersantateddy]

what are your thoughts on teddy's relationship with his family and how they were abusive? what about his younger sister?? and his relationship with his ex wife where he was also abused by her 🤔 how do you think these affected his personality and relationships. sorry this is an English essay ass prompt but im genuinely curious lmao i love analyzing family history (obvs)

Light coming in with the big gun from the get-go!!! Hahaha thank you for a great question!!!

So from what we know about Teddy's mom, she's a bit of a Wild Card™. Likes to do what she wants, when she wants, isn't exactly your traditional grandma.

But given the majority of people become docile with age (rather than more adventurous), it stands to reason /why/ she waited until retirement to do all the things she enjoyed? Could that be why her and Teddy's dad always used to argue?

Teddy's age places his parents as either dating or hooking up around the 70s/80s. Assuming they've never left the US, this wasn't exactly a pinnacle time for women's rights.

So we have an oppressive timestamp, a turbulent relationship, and then an extinction burst (Teddy's mom doing ALL her interests in retirement) post-breakup.

These factors together connote that teddy's father may have been restrictive/disapproving of teddy's mother's interests, hobbies, passions - or may be indicative of teddy's father's disdain/nonchalance towards his wife in general. (I'm assuming they were married because 'merica). Which would be an apt representation of Boomer relationships, the whole "can't live with them, can't live without them" (totally healthy /s).

But on the flipside to a potentially controlling father, his mom IS a wild card lol. If she's still up to mad shit in retirement, WHAT was she into in her prime?? Was she Fully Unhinged™? Given her, "muchness" (for lack of better words), it stands to reason it may transfer as "feisty" or "fiery" during arguments with teddy's dad, so whilst his dad may have been authoritarian, his mom may have been inflammatory and antagonistic.

As for his sister GIVE HER SOME GD SCREEN TIME!!!!!!! WHO ARE DANA AND DAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I wanna see if she's exactly like Teddy or if she's his antithesis, are they both so interested in learning about the lives of every stranger they meet? That's beautiful bro. I hope so. I both want her to be an almost identical twin to teddy, and to look exactly like her bf Dan (like the Van Houtens in the Simpsons). I think I want Dana to have the spunkiness that teddy lacks. I love the "anxious older sibling, feral younger sibling" dynamics, like what Tina and Louise have. I want an episode where Teddy's in therapy talking to Dr Marjorie about his childhood whilst Dana's out back wrestling a bar fly for his teeth or smn. Same trauma but dealt with in VERY different ways. I need it!!!!!!!!! I deserve this!!!!!!!!! LOL.

Moving onto Denise, FUCK Denise. Fuck any single individual that makes you feel like you have to change your core sense of self in order to feel accepted and/or loved. You KNOW she's that slimy level of manipulative that easily gets her own way in every situation. The type that rarely gets called up but if you call them up everyone else around will take their side. The GOOD manipulators. Real piece of shit types. The type to push you so far into a corner you come out crazy. So crazy noone believes you and they all side with the charismatic one. (These people boil my soul into an angry black jus, I become one of the 4 biles). IIRC we don't even get a full line from her, I'm pretty sure she only says "teddy?" (But please correct me if that's false), but that's still enough to solidify her as a shithouse in my mind. Questioning his name like don't pretend you don't know or recognise him you shitcunt, he gave you so much of his life. Eat a dick.

As negative as all these experiences are, I do think they shaped teddy for the better! I mean, he is a lil anxious and awkward and doesn't have the best self-esteem/confidence. BUT, he's incredibly emotionally intelligent for an old white guy. He's SO full of love, for EVERYONE. Every single person he comes across or meets (as exampled by S12E4 Driving Big Dummy), he fundamentally enjoys experiencing. They're not just people to chat to, they are experiences to be had. They are characters you've never heard of to stories you've never read. His approach to people is polar opposite to how most of us perceive other people, most of us are like Bob, he doesn't /hate/ people, but he doesn't /like/ them either. Teddy DOES like other people, he REALLY likes other people, he put the work into his trauma so it didn't taint the rest of him. I'm not gonna speak on behalf of everyone with PTSD but I know for a lot of us we fester on our trauma and victimise ourselves, often resulting in self- alienation and isolation, teddy shows no sign of that. S8E5 Thanks-Hoarding picks up on teddy being a handyman so he can "fix" his parents relationship (simplifying), but it doesn't address the fact he is CONSTANTLY putting himself out there. Handymen are a word-of-mouth trade, to be a successful handyman you HAVE to put yourself out there. To meet new people is to be vulnerable, and to be vulnerable with PTSD is like a rabbit exposing its belly to an owl yknow? Throughout the entire show we see teddy consistently putting the work in. Into every part of his life, he's making the effort to improve his life. I know healthcare in the US is a privilege that only the capitalists can afford, but it is so refreshing to see an American go to therapy instead of just complaining about how much they need therapy lol (no judgment, again I appreciate it's a nigh impossible situation to escape).

Thank you for the incredibly stimulating question, light!! (Sorry if I didn't answer all the questions fully! Will edit or update later!🤍)

[intrusiveinks]

I have a question. What is your MLP poly au about?

Sorry for the bad formatting I'm on phone and in a rush bc I spent all lunch writing this lmao

I also wanna start out by saying you don't have to agree with all my hcs n I don't mind other interpretations of these characters obviously, lmao

Tbh it's mainly just like random gay little hcs of mine, mainly surrounding the mane 6 being Poly, of course. I suppose it's technically one of my more fluid aus, as in not everything is honestly set in stone bc I can't decide if I want some of it to be darker or completely keep it more to Canon yet.

It's technically similar in some aspects to my Elements of Necessity Mane 6, just... a lot less horrible overall? Still not the the best ponies but also not the Worst like Necessity plans on being once I work on that again. (Especially w similarities w Twilight at least at first)

Despite shipping (almost) all of the mane 6 together (I just don't rlly see AJ n Pinkie as dating in any way, even if I don't entirely think they're actually related (I don't think they ever officially confirmed things in the show even later on so I could be wrong!)), my main fixation is on Dash x Pinkie x Shy and then also Twi x Rarity x Aj, and when talking to a friend I thought the concept of those two trios actually getting together first (and going through a semi-dramatic (kinda rivals in some cases) to friends to lovers thing and finally calming down then girls from both groups start falling for each other and it's chaos ALL OVER AGAIN!!!

Twilight is a lot more like ep 1 Twi (can u tell I loved that version of her) and she's not super social and when she is she can be rude (sometimes on purpose) and she's very work oriented and perfectionistic, even after she befriends the mane 6 in a similar way to the first ep, she doesn't do a super immediate flip and she doesn't ever entirely drop all of her more unsociable mannerisms because they are a part of her, she's not a total dick, but I like the thought that even people who don't socialize normally can be friends and have friendship!

Aj is a workaholic and kinda judgemental, especially if she doesn't really think somepony is as tough/mature/reliable as her, but she still tries to be polite because of how she was raised. A lot of those judgements normally happen when she feels like she's forced to interact with ponies who aren't relatives, (Rarity cough cough) but a lot of her judgements are because she forced herself to grow up fast and later on some of her frustrations turn out to be because she likes the others and not just bc she's annoyed.

Rarity is pretty much the same but even more slay serve dramatic queen in some aspects, she's actually pretty self conscious though, and for a while she's put herself in a creative rut because she feels ponies only want certain designs from her and she's scared to expand from that. (I wonder if 5 mares w different styles could help her out with that ;]) also kinda a workaholic.

Fluttershy is a EARTH PONY I do think unicorn Flutters is interesting but she's literally so earth pony coded idc!!! She's pretty much the same except a lot of her interactions (especially w Dash and Pinkie) are based on her admiration of them and then it becomes romantic over time. Similar with AJ and Rarity but in a kind of different way. With Twilight she actually relates to her social issues and ends up reaching out more when Twi is struggling to help her and the two of them get a bit of a bond sharing interests. Flutters also doesn't really care about getting messy and loves wilderness activities! The darkness is scary, but if she's scavenging in the day or sleeping in a tent she feels a lot safer, especially if she knows it's just some animals nearby (like a bear. And not a monster).

Pinkie is a pegasus like her Granny pie was because I said so, though she is the only one out of all her siblings to be one, (Maud, Lime, Marble, and Octavio), so she was actually raised on the ground, hence her hopping a lot of the time because it's like a middle ground for her! She's kinda mentally ill, and very ND obviously! She's been besties with Dash for AGES to the point Ponyville thinks they're gay before they even start dating (they don't say anything to be polite, Twilight is actually the one who says it out loud (she's still new) and it kicks off a "wait??? Do I like her??" For the two ponies who for the most part normally don't care about who they might like).

Dash is your local loser gamer boy but he's not only a boy she's also a girl (both states are masculine bc gender is a fuck!!!) She's still egotistical but a lot more aggressive in certain places too because of her own self consciousness issues. She's not diagnosed with ADHD but God he really needs to be! He actually deals more with storm clouds and the aftermath when it comes to weather! She's literally only been open with Pinkie about doing silly things like stimming for Ages bc she has a problem with admitting she may think she has anything. Kinda similar to how she ends up bonding w Twi over reading Daring-Do.

Idk if I've been too open about things but the base hcs for pronouns/Gender/etc for the mane 6 (at least in this au) are

Twilight - She/Her - Cis - Bisexual (She doesn't know it yet)

Rarity - She/Her, They/Them - Nonbinary (I can't decide exactly? Maybe a demigirl? Genderfluid? I'm unsure.) - Unlabeled

Apple Jack - She/Her - Cis - Sapphic (I'm not sure on anything for her yet I just know she deffo likes girls)

Fluttershy - She/Her, They/Them - Demigirl - Queer

Pinkie Pie - She/Her, They/Them, He/Him, It/Its, (Probably neos too) - Nonbinary (not really any solid gender identity but mainly goes as some form of a girl) - Pansexual

Rainbow Dash - He/Him, She/Her - Bigender (Male and Female Specifically) - She likes girls but she doesn't really care to label herself on specifics.

[blubushie]

Hi, hope you're having a good day, here's one of my aunt's puppies and frog in a bucket

(Sorry for that last ask, I think i was tring to express a sympathy on "dealing with this thing sucks", pretty sure I fucked it completely, learned I shouldn't send asks after midnight, sorry)

OHOHOHOHOHO

And nah it's fine <3 Tbh just didn't know how to respond cuz I'm in the same boat. I was basically deported and don't have Aussie citizenship despite trying for years and living there most my life lmao. I know exactly how it goes and it's a chore. "There's no demand for shooters" suck my dick I am singlehandedly saving our natural ecosystems rn 😭

Slight rant under cut

ETA: Also I've met too many people who genuinely talked about wanting to get Australian citizenship because of TF2. Because they think Australia is just Sniper or something. Or the best country ever while ignoring the climate change/racism/housing crisis/inflation/price gouging/cost of living/inhospitability/natural disasters/etc. Australia isn't in a good state right now, most people are barely able to survive, and our middle class is practically non-existent. But people see Sniper TF2 and go "omg Aussie..." and decide they wanna be Australian for some fucking reason while literally knowing zack about the country OUTSIDE of how it's portrayed in media. Nothing of us or our culture, they think they know some slang terms or some shit and that's enough to be considered Australian. And that gets on my fucking nerves cuz I'm still tryna get citizenship cuz it's literally my home and I grew up there.

People also only do this with Sniper btw. You don't see people going "I'm gonna move to GERMANY!!" cuz of Medic, or Russia for Heavy, or Texas for Engie, or Boston, or France, or anything else. It's literally just Sniper. This fandom is fucken weird fetishy about Australia sometimes and on rougher days I genuinely wanna leave it because of it. Any time someone says they want Australian citizenship my first question is why? What do you think Australia has/can give you that your home country can't? Too many bad experiences. This goes extra double for countries on the same development scale as Australia—America, Russia, the UK, South Africa, cuz then it's obvious that it's usually more about what they think Australia is like (because of what they've seen in media) rather than them trying to seek a better life/better opportunities elsewhere.

Anyway the amount of people coming into my DMs/inbox going "how do get Aussie citizenship/immigrate" is too damn high. My brother in gaming if I knew how then I wouldn't be stuck in America. And when I know they're in the TF2 fandom it basically always leaves a bad taste in my mouth cuz my kangaboo detector goes ding. So most those asks get deleted

Sorry for the ramble. This has been on my head a while though. I've met too many people who fetishise Australia/Aussies cuz of shit they've seen in media. Hits me in that "white people seeing exotic nature of locals" bone. Australia is still a "wild land" in some people's eyes so naturally people (usually white) wanna come here and be weird about it. And it usually leads to exploitation (see: arguing with First Nations to give up land rights to built fucking houses)

Rant over I'm burnt out lol. None of this is directed at you I'm just explaining why I deleted the ask. Didn't know how to respond + my kangaboo detector went off. So I played it safe

[authorofthemoon]

Finally playing Gotham Knights after putting it off for so long and I'm having a really good time. I heard some bad things about but it seems like it was being overheated for no reason. It's got some problems gameplay wise the movement can be clunky and it's easy to get caught on things so it can be annoying to walk around.

Combat is really fun though, in partial to Tim and Barbara but Jason's guns are fun. It took me a while to figure out Dick's playstyle cuz it relies on Momentum usage. But the skill trees are fun but I hate that the level cap keeps me from getting everything until new game plus which tbh I don't think the game needs a new game plus.

Characterization wise, I think it's pretty good. Even with all my knowledge of the batfamily, I still consider myself a casual Batman fan. Jason's design is still odd but I get they needed to differentiate between all the boys, Dick being tall and lean, Tim being a little rat boy, and Jason being built like a T. Still, I like how everyone's written.

Tims autistic coding is though the roof and I love to see it. I knew Dick had some bisexual coding in this game but it's super blatant lmao. The bisexual Blüdhaven mug, the 'gorgeous gorgeous people' interview, the 'Tim AND Dick are going to pride' email. Also, male civilians will call Nightwing cute it's just so much lol.

I liked getting to know Barb since I didn't know a ton about her before personality and I like how they dealt with Jason who's in therapy.

It's really full of fanservice and has the same vibes of Wayne Family Adventures in a good way. Not to mention all the pride flags in West End.

Only big complaint is that there's not a lot of story stuff or side stories imo. There's 8 chapters of the main plot and only 3 side cases of different villains that I did a third of the way into the game. I did a lot of side stuff before and became quickly overleveled which sucks cuz the cap is 30. Also I know it doesn't work in this universe, but I would like Stephanie Brown and Damian to be in the game. Duke and Cassie would also be cool but that would be so much.

I'm hoping this game gets a sequel and they can Tears of the Kingdom it and just reuse a bunch of assets and the engine to really expand on the second game.

I guess that's my mini review of Gotham Knights months after it's release lol. Again, I reallt hope this game gets some kind of sequel with more villains and just all around more story content and maybe more characters. Cassie, Stephanie, Duke, or Damian would be really cool or hell, if they're the new characters somehow.

But yeah thanks for taking the time to read my little opinions for whatever reason I really did just wanna talk a out this game.

[ahgasegotarmy116]

Hahaha it wasn’t the same person for the Jared and Tae asks but I see why you may have thought that 😂 (I’m the Jared anon) I just hate him with a passion and just cheaters in general really make me angry. I also loved the new chapter! I think we might be in different time zones and I’m kind of happy about it because I see your updates the second I wake up so it’s always an amazing start to my day. Whenever I check my phone to see what time it is, I’m also looking to see if I have any notifications from you. Your work always makes me so happy! Love you! 🥰

Lmao I love that my readers hate the bad guys in my stories as much as I do because it means that I'm doing a good job writing them so please hate on them all you want!

(Can't promise they won't be mean in their responses but alas 😂)

I hate cheaters too and I'm surprised to see that three of my series have cheating in them (difh, hddy and jti) because I truly hate when that happens.

I guess that's kinda the name of the game with the angsty stories I write 😂

I just don't like when Jungkook cheats on the reader so I don't think I'll ever write a fic like that. It would be a sick and twisted form of torture and I don't wanna go through that 😭

But if Jungkook cheats on his partner with the reader or the reader cheats on her partner with Jungkook then it's something I can stomach 🫠

Cheating is bad tho in any situation so please everyone be a decent human being and don't cheat on your partner! I don't want to romanticize the act of cheating so please take my stories with a grain of salt.

Yeah Jared is a dick that's for sure. He's a narcissist in it's purest form and there really aren't any redeeming qualities in him.

Aw yay! I'm glad you liked it!

I'm in PST but I just tend to update really late because I get most of my writing in at night 😅

I'm so happy you feel that way about my stories 😭 you guys are too nice to me I swear but I'm glad that I can make your days a little bit better with my silly little delusions 😂

(Well, they're not really silly all the time but yk what I mean 🫠)

Anyways thank you for being so nice to me and making me laugh when you attack the bad guys and I hope you'll look forward to future updates! 💜

[2af-afterdark]

AMAB!mc/Gabriel thot for the God au!

Gabriel getting fucked by mc and begging them to cum inside of him. They do, several times, and when they're done Gabriel inserts a butt plug up his ass to make sure it all stays inside. Bonus points if mc teases him relentlessly for it.

Also, what are your thoughts on double penetration in one hole? I really wanna see Gabriel struggle to take two at once and completely lose his composure. He'd probably be taking mc and another angel. Maybe Michael? Raphael? Or maybe even a devil lmao, but I don't think you could convince him

Good thot is good.

How do you think Gabriel begs? Does he whisper sweet nothings in MC's ear? Does he spread his ass and ask to be treated like a whore? Does he take the initiative and ride MC to prove his dedication? How does one secure not only God's attention but also their time? Surely by playing into thwir interests. And, let's be honest, God or not, MC is a pervert who would easily be seduced by someone as pretty as Gabriel offering himself to them. And you know MC would adore watching Gabriel shove that plug inside to prevent their cum from flowing out. They would probably tease that Gabriel needs a bigger one to plug up that greedy hole of his.

Also, dp in one hole is great. Fantastic. Love it as a trope the most when the two dicks belong to enemies fucking a third party they both want, but Gabriel struggling to accept two dicks is good too. A few choices here: 1) Gabriel starts with bouncing on MC and the third party comes from behind and slip in as a fun surprise. 2) Gabriel has to let party three fuck him nice and loose until MC is amused enough to join. 3) Gabriel has to be a good boy and lower himself onto both of them at the same time. It'll be a tight squeeze and may hurt a bit, but it's fun for MC and that's what matters~

No matter what, Gabriel will not maintain his calm. Granted, that may be due to knowing his precious MC is watching him... but it's fun to watch the once scary angel fall apart like that.

As for who part three is... that's a hard call in God au. Definitely not Raphael since they despise MC still and would sooner choose the kill option in fuck, marry, kill. Michael could maybe work, but probably not given he's trying to reshape MC and so he would tolerate their... Eccentricities. Gabriel would hate behind rammed by a devil, but if MC said it... who is he to reject his God's will? Doubt many of the devils would want to do it, but you can find someone I'm sure.

[moodymisty]

I just wanna say thank you for not making you Crosshair 110% sex driven all the time. I throughly enjoy the facets where it’s pure sass and snark. Truly is a breath of fresh air.

Would you be willing to write a TBB HC of what it would be like to essentially have a female Crosshair join the group (and how everyone is caught in the crossfire of them trying to one up each other)?

Awww I'm so glad you like how I write him! I know well that my characterization of him won't be as popular (no shade people have different tastes!) But I just wanted to write what I like and maybe someone out there would like my little niche. I know that Crosshair stans are perpetually down bad which I mean, same, but I also like scene-building and snarky chatter. Send help lmao

Anyhoo, here you go hun I had a good amount of fun with this

🖤 Crosshair is one of those guys that has to be privy to everything. So when he hears that -at least for the time being- they'll be joined by another, he is on it. Whether you’re a civilian, soldier or bounty hunter, it all sends him into the same fit at the idea of 'unwelcome' company.

Crosshair barely gets along with his brothers, it would be wishful thinking that he'd get along some random person who is being shoved with them while they're stuck on some backwater planet. Let alone when he finds out that your speciality is the same as his.

🖤 But at first, it’s actually Hunter who attempts to refuse you staying on the Marauder. He fully insists that it’s because ‘We don't have a leash short enough to keep him from making the Marauder more miserable than it already is, without another sniper on board.’ But he can’t exactly refuse orders coming from above him, and so he ends up having to let you aboard anyways.

The second you make it up the gangplank and inside you see him; Leaning against the wall he spots your rifle case and makes a comment about it being 'to big for you'. And in that moment you just know this is going to be a battle, giving him a sugar coated sneer before moving right past.

Even if Hunter admonishes him and attempts to get him to play nice; Crosshair is irked with you already.

🖤 He attempts the usual; Aloof and standoffish only throwing out thinly veiled insults. It all fails miserably, because not only does it bounce off, you come back with the same energy just as hard. You're normally pretty quiet while on missions, but if Crosshair decides to mutter some sort of comment about nat-borns, you're quick to fire right back.

'Great,' Hunter thinks; Out of all the people they could've been stuck with, they're stuck with the one who is constantly baiting Crosshair and brewing a storm between the both of you.

You're more than a great sniper; If Crosshair hadn't quite literally been bred for it, they wouldn't be surprised if you could beat him as you already gave him a run for his money to begin with.

They all just wish you'll stop staring at each other like that, either one of you waiting for who's going to say something first. All of the batch swears he can feel the arcing sparks between both snipers.

🖤 I love to think that after awhile however it sort of becomes more so a silly little ritual to smack talk or be snide to one another than fighting; To the point that you notice Crosshair almost seems to pout if you don’t take his bait.

It doesn't have as much venom as it did when you first met, but it doesn't mean either of you lost that bite. That's half the fun after all.

🖤 But how does the rest of the batch react to it? After all, you are stuck in tight confines with them all quite often. Not really much can happen on the Marauder that the rest aren't privy to, and that includes bickering.

Echo finds it amusing when someone, particularly you, manages to get the other to shut their trap. The time you snapped at Crosshair you weren’t in the mood for the usual dick whipping contest today he had to bit his cheek to hold back a guffaw. It's almost endearing that Crosshair met his match, even if it results in more arguing. At least it isn't directed at him anymore.

Wrecker also finds it entertaining, but certain innuendos tend to go over his head. He most so enjoys when things get competitive, even if Hunter or Echo tend to shut things down before the rifles are pulled out. But still whenever skill is directly mentioned, Wrecker is the first one to one to try and bring up a good old fashioned shoot off.

Tech tends to just ignore it, but sometimes you can get a smile out of him if you make some sort of clever joke or innuendo. He also is grateful if one of you manages to shut up the other- who he doesn't particularly care, so he can finally work in peace.

Hunter is in abject misery at first, but eventually just accepts it as part of the new energy in the Marauder now. No battles were won by micromanaging, at least not ones he remembers. But… maybe please keep valuable supplies out of your little spats. He feels the headache brewing already.

🖤And just as a little bonus: As for romance if you ever decide to go that route? Crosshair isn’t above using dirty tricks like subtle hints over comms or a graze of his hand over your hip while you're aiming. Then again, you play the same tricks right back. It's so obvious, but everyone just kind of lets you believe you're being subtle.

But That fiery sense of snark and competition always stays, to the point that if any of the batch see you raising your eyebrows and letting out a 'hmm' before looking to the other, they all groan at the battle that's inevitably coming.

[onboardsorasora]

Welcome back to another fever dream random thing i read that made my brain itch. I need to workshop the name lmao but I saw a tweet and made a prompt out of it. I've also lost the tweet but thankfully I wrote down the 'prompt' side of it. This is silly, please don't take it seriously.

Prompt: Dragons re emerge in society but thanks to a long forgotten prophecy, only those who are knighted can slay a dragon. (So that means actors and sports people etc, are the only ones allowed to slay them) 1400 words, near future fic

Lewis pulled his balaclava off of his head, shaking his braids free from the low bun he'd kept them in at the nape of his neck. 

A stern-faced official with RDC emblazoned on his starched white button down came to usher him into the close by FIA building. 

The race had been red flagged because of a dragon swarm.

Lewis looked around at the assembled drivers and staff, accepting his water bottle and towel from Angela with a sigh and a rolling of his eyes. This was their new normal. 

Some archeologist went into a cave that unveiled itself after a glacier melted and unearthed a dragon's lair. Between the archeology dick riding and global bureaucracy, the eggs in the hearth hatched and dragons started swarming the air.

The British government enacted a long dead branch of the house of commons and the royal dragon committee was reborn. Just like the dragons. 

So far there had been little done to combat the new threat. What with the previously stated global bureaucracy and dick riding. 

The archeologists and other scientists wanted to study the creatures and place them under the endangered animals listings. But the governments of the world wanted them all eradicated.

There were many people combing the archives for ways to deal with the dragons, to see what had been written in the past about them. And to see if there was a way for the modern world to coexist with the creatures. 

Until that was sorted, the current mode of operation was to take cover when dragons were swarming in the area. 

The noise level was pretty loud with so many people crammed in the small area that hadn't been expressly created for that purpose. it was still new to everyone so they were still figuring out how best to adjust.

Daniel saddled up beside him, slipping in between a FIA staffer and George. Lewis smiled at him around the straw in his water bottle. 

“Jeepers, they were loud this time, yeah?” Daniel grinned and Lewis followed the upward pull of his lips with his eyes. 

“Have they figured out where this swarm came from?” Lewis asked when Daniel brushed their shoulders together as if he'd stumbled and lost his footing with all the jostling going on. This was the most contact they could manage in public like this.

“No, but just before the red flag I overheard that there might finally be some decisions on how to manage the whole thing ethically.” Angie offered, Lewis' eyes widened.

“For real?” He asked at the same time Daniel went “thank fuck.���

Daniel continued when Angie didn't. “Don't get me wrong, it was like cool at first but dragons are fucking annoying. And like don't get me started on the wyvern crowd. They're so fucking pretentious, we all know you wanna like fuck em– just stop making it our business.” Daniel rolled his eyes playfully, shoulders sagging with relief that maybe the end would be near.

George chuckled and Lewis fought the splinter of jealousy at the sound. 

“Who do you reckon would fuck a dragon Danny?” 

Daniel looked at George with a deadpan ‘I know we're thinking about the same person’ face and the two of them, at the same time said; “Charles” before bursting into laughter. Lewis wasn't sure if he wanted to understand more about that.

They all waited around listlessly for a while longer, reminding everyone of the long delays of the first Vegas race and that similar time in testing in ‘24. By the end of the evening and the race, everyone was cranky and very happy to head back to their hotels.

Lewis left the Ferrari hospitality, pulling his plaits backwards into a topknot and smiled when he found Daniel loitering in the paddock. He was tugging on his Red Bull cap, making that unconscious scrunching face he always does. 

“Hey mate.” Daniel grinned widely, stepping forward to meet Lewis in the middle of the walkway.

“Ready to go?” 

“Let's get out of this hellhole.” Daniel chuckled, tugging on the straps of his navy bag.

They were about to walk away when a group of people including Sir Jackie Stewart came to stop them. Daniel and Lewis looked at each other perplexed.

“Lewis, I'm glad we've caught you. A word?” Jackie asked, the RDC members beside him looked as severe as always. 

“Uh, sure Jackie. How can I help you?” Lewis furrowed his brow but kept his face neutral even as the RDC guys started looking at Daniel as if he would disappear by their gaze alone.

“Uhm I'll give you gents some privacy.” Daniel said awkwardly after a while before turning and walking into the Sauber garage. 

“Lewis, can we have a moment in private?” Lewis noticed now how uncomfortable Jackie looked, along with how tense the RDC guys appeared. He nodded wordlessly, knowing that whatever was happening couldn't possibly be good.

They settled in an office in the stewards building, Lewis leaned against the wall by the door, watching as everyone turned to watch him. “What's going on?” He demanded.

“There's been a new development with the current legislation for dragon eradication and remediation.” it was Jackie who spoke up, his voice as quiet and steady as it always is. Lewis frowned.

“That's great and all but what does that have to do with me? Do you need like a face for the campaign or something? Because Jackie I hardly think I'm the most qualified candidate for this effort.” 

“Actually. That's why we're here. The legislation has been passed down that only the knighted can slay or be present in the act of slaying a dragon.” 

Jackie's statement was met with silence. Lewis stared at him blankly, what did that have to do with him? Then

“Wait– you're not saying?”

“I am.”

“Jackie, that doesn't make any fuckin’ sense.”

“Lewis, it is out of our hands.”

“What the fuck, how does that even make fucking sense?” Lewis was completely blindsided, his wide eyes watched when one of the RDC members stepped forward unrolling a fucking piece of parchment.

“Sir Lewis Carl Davidson Hamilton  Larbalestier, by the power vested in me by the King of England, I hereby enlist you in the ranks of the Dragon Knights.”

There was a tone in his head, blanking out anything further that the man before him read aloud. What the fuck. How the fuck was this even allowed? How was this ok!? 

“What the actual fuck?!” Lewis said the only thing that was repeating in his brain on loop. This didn't make a lick of sense. He was a formula one driver, a racer, a sportsman. His knighthood was very symbolic at best and meant nothing in terms of actual power or military prowess. He never had to complete military training like Valtteri or Kimi had been required to. He knew next to nothing about military strategy or dragons. And he sure as hell knew nothing about killing them.

“None of this even seems ethical.” He blurted. His brain didn't know what straw to grasp and hold on to. Everything felt like it was going too fast.

“The archivists found something, a written decree from centuries ago that only those knighted by the monarch could slay a dragon. For the prestige and glory of it all. There's been no addendum, and unfortunately it is the last bit of legislation on the matter.”

“Well can't Wills change it!?” Lewis knew his voice was high, reedy, hysterical. But he didn't care. This was ludacris.

“It's not that simple. There's too much red tape and the monarch answers to parliament so there needs to be unanimous consensus for a new law to be written.”

Lewis snorted. “Jackie, this can't be real life.” He looked at the retired driver, taking in how wan and fragile he looked since Lewis last saw him this afternoon at the anthem ceremony. He couldn't imagine how long Jackie had been sitting with this news. How long now since an RDC member read him his rights.

“You're speaking to the choir.” Jackie sighed, sitting heavily in one of the chairs around the conference table.

Lewis came to sit beside him, heavy with his own fears and swirling thoughts. He wished they had a bottle of something strong to share. He thought about Daniel waiting for him in the paddock and wondered if he should text him to head out without him. Things weren't at all sorted here.

He sighed, then snorted.

“Well with all the knights in the house of commons, maybe we'll get a change in legislation before we know it.” Lewis giggled when one of the RDC guys laughed uproariously.