#but it's a thing he does! hilariously in the context of this conversation because he thinks Jin Ling should rely on Jiang Cheng for support

[gendercomsumer]

hiii ^^ I would like some headcanons for riddle, malleus, vil and rook with a fem mc that accidentally ends up making them laugh (because what she says or does is very random xd maybe an example would be like jennifer lawrence sjjs she is very funny ) well that's all, thanks and take care <3

Riddle, Malleus, Vil, and Rook with an S/O who can make them laugh with the most random things

A/N: Hello to you too Anon! I know this has been in my inbox for gods knows how long- But thank you still for sending this in! I hope this is to your liking! I actually did watch some Jennifer Lawrence videos for inspiration and I have to agree the comedic timing she has is perfect!! I also used some google translate in Rooks part so it may not be accurate ^^;

Characters: Riddle, Malleus, Vil, and Rook

Warnings: Cursing to a mild degree, playful mention of stalking in Rooks (I love him I swear!!!), lightly proof read

Fem!Reader

Riddle Rosehearts

Riddle is a bit difficult to get a good genuine laugh out of, at least in my opinion.

Like sure you have a small chuckle when he finds something amusing, but i feel like it'd be a bit of a challenge to get a good genuine laugh out of.

Then you came in, saying the strangest things at the most unrelated times!

And Ace and Deuce find this absolutely hilarious

You'll say the most out of pocket shit with the straightest face and somehow half the people around you start to laugh some others breaking out in giggles

Ace and Deuce have definitely talked about this 'talent' of yours, at least in their words.

You had said some of these strange comments around Riddle and he found them strange a bit endearing as well

I'd think the time you got a good laugh out of him was when you had come with him to take care of some of the hedgehogs

The two of you were sitting in the grass some of the hedgehogs were playing while a few had decided that climbing on the two of you was a good way to pass the time

One had wandered up onto your head and almost fell off but luckily you were able to save the little guy before he fully hit the ground

After Riddle worriedly checked the little guy over you while looking over his shoulder at the small animal said:

"Well at least we know this one has no self preservation"

Unwillingly, or maybe subconsciously, a small laugh makes it's way through Riddles chest to his lips.

Well, now maybe he saw what those two were blabbering on about

Your little comments were always appreciated with Riddle

Even if they didn't cause him to laugh they did brighten his mood at least somewhat

"Yes, this one does tend to be a bit of a handful. Reminds me of a certain rose I know"

He teased before you two fell back into the pattern of caring for the small animals

More chuckles and comments to come no doubt

Malleus Draconia

At first Malleus didn't understand why the rest of Diasomnia found your remarks so comical

Yes his child of man did tend to bring a certain warmth where ever she walked

But he didn't see this as an excuse for the amount of laughter you cause people around you

Most of the remarks you make will fly over his head

I'm sorry but he seems like the kind of guy to not get the joke until you explain it to him-

Now the Thorn Prince does share a few chuckles with those around him when he finds something amusing, similar to Riddle

But it's even more difficult to get a laugh out of him considering he doesn't get a lot of the play on words type of jokes

but something abrupt and slightly out of context?

I feel like that would get some sort of laugh out of him

One day you were talking with Malleus about some of the things you did in your old world

The topic of amusement parks came up and you started listing the rides you used to go on as a child

Roller coasters, bumper cars, lazy rides where you could relax, until you blanked on the name of a ride

It was frustrating considering it was probably something simple and you would remember it after their conversation, but you wanted to keep the ball rolling

Malleus mean while was partly enjoying seeing how frustrated you got over a simple word

You really were a strange thing weren't you Child of man?

"I'm sorry Mal- I know what I'm thinking of! It's on the tip of my tongue- It's like one of those horse tornado things!"

Horse.. tornado..?

Now that got Malleus attention

he understood the other rides you described, favoring the lazy rides

but what ever this horse tornado was... it sounded.. strange, yet curious at the same time

"CAROUSELS!! FUCKING CAROUSELS, THAT'S WHAT THEY'RE CALLED!"

Malleus let out a small puff of air before he started chuckling under his breath

You truly were a strange one weren't you child of man, just like the world you came from

Malleus pressed a kiss to your forehead letting out one more chuckle before speaking

"Truly fascinating, maybe one day you could bring me to one of these 'horse tornados' you have me interested"

Sure jokes your fly over his head, but he would tease you some what for your small skips in memory

Vil Schoenheit

Now Vil, having acted in a lot of movies, (If I'm correct) Would have probably had a few good laughs in that line of work

Weather that be on set or behind the cameras

But he doesn't often let out a good laugh in public, it's not really part of the proper image he'd want to put out there

As for behind closed doors or with close friends he's definitely willing to have a laugh

And who better to bring a smile to his face than his lovely sweet potato?

Though one good moment always stuck out to him that caused him to have one of the most genuine laughs in awhile

The two of you were getting ready to go out to a fancy restaurant, courtesy of Vil of course, hair, makeup, shoes things like that

While Vil was sitting at his vanity working on his eyes when you came out of the bathroom in a stunning dress hand picked by Vil

It brought out all your best features while still being enough coverage to where it wasn't uncomfortable to wear into a public area

The two of you made idle conversation as you sat on a near by chair to slip on a matching set of heels for the dress

As you stood up in the heels to work on your own makeup you lost your balance thanks to the new height the heels provided

Although Vil was quick to catch you making sure you came no where near the floor he still was concerned

"Oh sweet potato are you alright? What happened?"

Yes looking back on it the question seemed dumb but he was concerned

but you just let out a giggle while regaining your balance before saying:

"Well I'm not sure what happened, but I remember wanting to yell 'fuck' as my last words before I embarrassed myself"

Vil took a moment while looking at you

then a chuckle escaped his lips which soon turned into the two of you sharing a small laugh

Now Vil doesn't know why he laughs at your antics, in hindsight they're just normal phrases

But maybe it's the delivery?

Or the way you smile at him?

What ever it may be it always causes a smile to grace his lips or a chuckle to be drawn from him

Sure Vil maybe all about preserving beauty and making sure he looks flawless

But if he happens to get a few smile lines because of your antics, he will never hold it against you

"Well my darling, I'm glad to hear you're alright. It would be a shame if you or your lovely dress got roughed up before we left. Now come, you still want to do your makeup don't you? Allow me to help"

Rook Hunt

Now Rook has plenty of laughs in his life

Weather that be from stalking some poor soul or a genuine laugh among friends

Rook out of the four is probably the easiest to get a laugh from

He's a joyful guy wanting to see all nature and the world has to offer! Can you blame him?

Then enters you who some how can't help but leave Rook giggling when ever you do something!

You put your tie on wrong? Oh silly Trickster aren't you just the sweetest thing!

Then comes your words which to Rook is a whole new ball park

Rook tends to hold onto every word meant for him, weather that be written or spoken out loud

His darling Tricksters words are so elegant and so sweet how could he not treasure everyone!

What really gets him chuckling and laughing is the moments when your words aren't as sweet and graceful

Cut to one day when you and Rook were in the fields often used for flying class

Rook had a desire to teach you archery so he happened to drag you along with a quiver and bow to some targets set by his hand

After the first few moments of Rook teaching you how to properly hold and aim the bow and making sure your arm guard was secure (He wouldn't want his darling trickster to get rope burn!) He let you shoot

All was going well as you hit targets in an... acceptable way

But all that seemed to end when a large gust of wind sent your best shot yet off course and into the ground

And just as Rook was about to offer some encouragement to keep going and try once more

some colorful language came from you to say the least

"Wind!? Really!?! Could you not wait two fucking minuets!! Nooooo! You just had to thro my best shot off course you-!"

Now don't get Rook wrong he hold the sweet words you two share close to his heart

But there was just something about you yelling at the wind of all things that caused him to start laughing

As he laid on the grass of the field eyes closed as he laughed

Oh? It seems your colorful language is directed towards him now? Even better!

"Trickster- reine de mon coeur! Please I believe- I believe you have shared plenty enough words with the wind today!"

A/N: This is actually the first time I've taken a good look at the name of Malleus' dorm. Dia = Dragon. Somnia = Sleep

Diasomnia = Dragon of sleep

just a ting i found silly :)

[charcubed]

Don / Timeline Mobius' kids are coded as Lokis.

This does NOT mean Mobius = father figure.

More so that Mobius' previous wife was probably a mischievous scamp, and... jet-skis also relate to Mobius' true passions.

What will HE want?

Let me explain :)

First: look at the kids.

Kevin = Sylvie.

That's a minute man ^

Just like Sylvie burnt in season 1, episode 1 – and everything she used (the lamp and the reset charges) was stolen, just like Kevin's matches.

And the other kid?

Sean = Loki.

"Don" gets him to help in the same way Mobius got Loki to help catch Sylvie in season 1.

This tactic...

...is the same as this tactic.

The exact same method, on full display! Very amusing to me personally.

Aside from the fact that his kids are, hilariously, little hellions and perhaps take after their wayward mother (who maybe ran away in typical Loki fashion, if she wasn't snapped by Thanos? 👀)… and that that gave Mobius the unique ability to know how to "handle" Lokis, even subconsciously…

We see towards the end of the episode that "Don" cares about his kids, yes; of COURSE he cares about them! They need him!

But.

Being a parent reallyyyy isn't his passion. The work (in this case, jet-skis) is his ACTUAL passion.

He drops everything kid-related to talk about jet-skis... and also drops everything kid-related to talk to Loki.

These 2 things explicitly criss-cross. Deliberately in the context of Don trying to get Loki to fill the role of his new romantic partner.

Plus, y'know, there's the fact that Don immediately flirts with Loki at the store by telling him his entire schedule and announcing to him that he's single. Which is fucking amazing.

Yeah, that's the actual dialogue.

So, I'll spell it all out:

Don's kids are mischievous scamps, and his wife probably is/was too.

Loki is Mobius' ideal partner (which we already knew, but this is another fun detail to enjoy!) – and Loki will actually STAY. He'll REMAIN, if you will.

Mobius' ideal life involves focusing on work that he's passionate about, not being a parent. And it's OKAY for him to want that! Especially in the context of his TVA life. He has purpose-driven work; he's not "abandoning" his kids. And he's helping others.

Loki's conversation with Sylvie is a whole other post to unpack, but: what's wrong with wanting something?

Or: what's wrong with wanting SOMEONE?

It's about "who."

If you're very lucky... the where/when/why AND "who" align.

At the TVA, for Mobius, they do and they will.

Oh, that's lovely.

Yeah.

------

I write lots of Loki meta on Twitter, whoops! I haven't crossposted all of my ep5 meta yet because I'm offline this weekend, but you can find my tweets collected here.

My stuff on tumblr is under the tag "chars loki posts."

[farfromstrange]

Tupperware | Matt Murdock x Reader

Masterlist

Pairing: Matt Murdock x F!Reader

Summary: A conversation about kitchen supplies leads to something more...

Warnings: SMUT 18+ MINORS DNI, oral m!receiving, unprotected p in v (wrap it b4 you tap it), multiple orgasms, aftercare

Word Count: 6.7k (This is a literal Smut Beast)

A/n: Yeah, whatever you think the title means in context, I guarantee you, this is different. But also, maybe not. I found this in my drafts because it was originally planned as an FG One Shot, but I decided to just throw my plans off the board and turn it into a reader insert (I've written this a while back, but I reread and edited it). Funny story: I found this writing prompt and it reminded me of the accent I have and how I say Tupperware (and how everyone in my State says Tupperware, the German version ofc), and I found it funny because that is definitely something I did when I said it in English for the first time. Anyway, enjoy!

The couple sat on his couch, the lights of the Billboard growing more distinctive as the sun started to set. He was working on the paperwork that had piled up over the days while she was reading something on her laptop. The steady typing of her fingers synchronized with her steady breathing. He didn’t mind the sound of her working. He enjoyed the carelessness of it all. Just two people seeking the comfort of each other’s presence while doing two completely different things. It wasn’t weird, it was productive.

At some point, he reached for her leg that was poking his side and placed it in his lap. She smiled at the casual, domestic action. His fingers stroked her calves absentmindedly while his mind continued to occupy itself with the information on the case that reached in through his headphones.

He heard her laugh at something. He smiled as he asked, “What?”

“I was looking for some accessories for our kitchen,“ – his heart bloomed at the pronoun, – “And now Google is trying to sell me  Tubberware,” she stated. “I don’t even use Tubberware anymore.”

The headphone fell from his ear.

“What are you saying?” Matt asked.

His lip twitched, more in disbelief than amusement, but it was also weirdly adorable, the way the ‘b’s’ rolled from her tongue.

“Say it again,” he told her.

Her eyebrows crinkled. “Tubberware,” she said, remaining serious and clueless throughout.

“Say it again. Slow.”

“Tubberware.”

“Slow, very slow– actually, say the first syllable.”

Her frown deepened. “Tub,” she said confidently.

Matt bit his cheek. “Wrong.”

“What do you mean, wrong?”

“I thought I caught that. You’re saying tub. It’s P.”

He had to keep telling himself not to laugh, but it was so incredibly hard with the pout on her lips growing by the second.

She removed her leg from his lap and sat upright, laptop moving dangerously close to the edge of her thighs. “What are you talking about?” she asked.

“Tupperware,” he stated. “Tupper.”

Blood rushed to her cheeks. “It’s Tupperware?!”

He couldn’t hold it any longer. The laugh rolled off his lips like a serenading song. “It’s Tupperware, always has been, always will be,” he choked out.

The pout came back, stronger than before. A frustrated pout. This was entirely different from the confused and irritated one. “I thought it was tubberware because it kind of looks like a tub,” she muttered.

“Oh, baby,” he laughed.

“It looks like a tub,” she said.

“I know it does. I’m sorry.”

“Stop laughing at me, you dick!”

“I’m really sorry, sweetheart. It’s just… say it again. Please. For me.”

“So that you can make more fun of me?” she asked. “No thank you.”

“I’m not making fun of you, I promise. It just sounds so cute when you say it. Do it for me, please. I want to hear it again.”

She didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of laughing too. She was supposed to be mad at him, but she somehow couldn’t because looking at it from this angle, she realized how stupid it was. Tubberware. It was hilarious, even.

“Tubberware,” she said again, trying to breathe through the fit of laughter bubbling in her throat.

Matt laughed. “Again,” he begged.

“Tubberware.”

“It’s so cute, I can’t-“ his voice cracked.

“I hate you!”

“I know you want to laugh,” he titled his head knowingly, “so laugh.”

“No,” she said.

“Please."

“Don’t tell me what to do,” but at this point, she was already laughing. The sound he loved so much grew louder by the second.

Her stomach hurt. His did, too.

“I’ve been saying it for years,” she said between breaths. “And no one’s ever told me. Oh, God!”

“I’m sorry,” said Matt. “I didn’t mean to… Tubberware.” He giggled. “It’s adorable.”

“Shut up!"

"I'm sorry, I'll stop." He wiped some more of his laughing tears.

Grateful for his attempt to compose himself, she nodded. "Okay,” she turned back toward her laptop, “While we’re already on the issue, do we need anything else?"

He threw his head back, thinking. “We could use some new spatulas,” he said. "And lunchboxes. Tupperware has some great choices, you should take a look."

Her laugh died into a smile. “You know I love you, right?”

“I love you too, sweetheart.”

“What I’m saying is, we’re not getting Tubberware.”

“Why not?” He cocked an eyebrow. “They’ve got great kitchen stuff and it’s easy to use. You know, for me as a blind man…”

“Matt Murdock, are you one of those Tubberware grandmas?” It was her turn to laugh.

He pouted. “Shut up.”

“Oh no, we need to talk about this.”

“No, I’ve got work to do. You should buy what I just said. We definitely need that.”

“Alright, let me see what Amazon has," she said.

“No, we'll get it from Tupperware," he retorted. "I've been using nothing else for years."

“That's not my problem. There are cheaper options. Amazon, same-day delivery.  Why do we have Prime if we don't use it? And don't say because of the Podcasts, we have Spotify, which is ten times better."

“Tupperware has better quality.”

“I'm buying the spatula and the lunchboxes from Amazon, end of discussion.”

There was a playful smile on his lips, already telling her what he was about to say next was merely a joke. “You’re not the man of the house,” Matt argued. “As the man of the house, I dictate where we buy our kitchen supplies.”

She gasped, her mouth hanging wide open as she processed his words. Even though it was a joke, she couldn't help but feel slightly offended at even the prospect. Shaking her head, she cocked her eyebrows at him and said, “And as the woman you depend on to suck your dick, I strongly suggest you think about what you just said.”

He bit his cheek. “Oh, so we’re going there?”

She smirked. “I thought you could handle it, tough guy.”

“Okay, that’s it!” He tossed the case file aside, tore the laptop from her hands, and pulled her into his lap in one swift motion.

Matt was always the first to suggest a gentle game of teasing, but he barely had any tolerance for it. He was always the first to get riled up, no matter what. Perhaps she should have thought twice about her words, but it was so much more fun to see him like this than give in too soon.

He rolled her hips down into his, his fingers sure to leave bruises as he guided her along his slacks. The moan she let out was guttural.

Matt bit down on her earlobe. “Mouth off on me again and this is all you’re gonna get for the next week,” he said.

Her thighs fluttered around his own. The heartbeat between her legs bounced off his muscles. The room suddenly grew too hot to breathe the toxic air in.

“On second thought,” she began, though when Matt’s lips wandered from her ear to her neck and down to her cleavage, the words got caught in her throat.

He ran his hands under her shirt. Her skin was hot. The rough callouses of his fingers pulled the fabric aside until it slipped off her shoulders.

“No bra,” he smirked. “Nice.”

She whined. “I really need to buy kitchen supplies now, Matt,” she tried again.

He sucked one of her nipples into his hot mouth. If they were hard due to the cold air in the apartment or because his touch sent her into overdrive she wasn’t sure, but once he was on her all she could think about was his stupid mouth on her tits.

Her nipple slipped off his tongue with a pornographic plop. “I want you to do as I say,” he said.

“You can't use your bedroom voice when we're talking about the apartment. Oh, fuck!”

He slapped his hand flat on her ass.

“You were saying?”

She wanted to wipe that shit-eating grin off his perfectly wet lips.

“Stop teasing me.”

Matt leaned back from the mess he made on her chest, eyelids fluttering innocently, hands rested on her hips again. “You said you needed to buy kitchen supplies,” he said.

And he was instantly back in his teasing mood, believing he finally got the upper hand.

“I lied,” she said.

“No, you didn’t. You really need to buy kitchen supplies.”

She huffed. “Fine, guess I’ll do it myself.”

He wanted to laugh.

Her shorts accompanied her shirt on the floor. Half naked, she plopped down next to him on the couch again.

Matt choked on nothing at all, her scent thick in the air. When her thighs moved, the sound it made was wet, hot, and sticky. He loved that sound. He loved it most when it was as close to his ears as possible, squished between those perfect thighs that made the sound unbearable.

She threw her head back, throat exposed. She sighed. Her fingers ran over her body, barely touching, only testing the waters. All hairs on her body stood at full attention, the ache between her thighs thudding so hard to the point where she could hear nothing but blood in her ears. Her heart sped up, half because of embarrassment, the other half because of excitement. She wasn’t sure what was stronger. They’d never done anything like this before and she doubted he’d even let her. Up until this point he hadn’t done anything but listen closely though, fists clenched around the soft fabric of his slacks close to his crotch.

Her fingers ghosted over the waistband of her panties. Black silk. He liked the feeling of lace on her, but after some time it began to tickle and he hated the way it itched at his skin, so she barely wore lace anymore. He had his hands on her at all times, she had to adapt.

Matt’s hand shot out instantly. Her fingers barely breached her panties and he already had enough. “Don’t you dare,” he said.

“Why?” she challenged. Her voice was nothing but a series of breaths.

“Because it’s mine.”

“If you won’t touch me-“

He shoved his fingers down her underwear.

“Fuck!” Her head fell even further down the armrest.

“You were saying?”

“I’m sorry. Keep going.”

“Why?” his thumb stopped over her clit. “Why should I give you anything?”

“Because I will buy or- or do anything you want from now on, I promise!”

“Watch your tone, sweetheart,” he bellowed.

“Please,” she squirmed, searching for any kind of friction. His hand kept her hips restrained without even trying, any move grazing her just enough to make her body jolt, but not nearly enough to be pleasurable.

“Hm,” he hummed.

“Please?”

“Okay,” and he pressed his thumb down so hard, she swore she saw stars dance around her clouded vision.

She moaned just the way he liked it. “Fuck.”

“Will you keep quiet?” Matt resumed his work. Even though his pants were painfully tight, he acted like nothing had happened. “I need to finish this paperwork,” he told her. “I won’t ignore my responsibilities just because someone decided to be a needy whore today. So if you want to cum, you better stay quiet so I can concentrate.”

His thumb worked its way up and down her clit, circled, and drew patterns she’d never seen before. She bit into her bottom lip until it drew blood.

He knew her body better than anyone else, better than herself even. He knew what she liked, what made her squirm, what she didn’t like, and what could make her body shake instantly.

Her body was an altar. He had every last inch mapped out to perfection. Her skin was soft like a sunny day in spring and it smelled salty like the sea, sweet like the field of flowers in Central Park, and distinctive like summer rain. Every time he touched her, he was on fire. The temperature in her body changed with every flick of his fingers. Every hitch of her breath he caught onto. She didn’t even have to tell him to keep going, he simply knew.

Matt worshipped her body like he would kneel on the bench at church. She was a row of burning candles before the cross and he knelt before her like a pathetic disciple willing to do anything to please the divine being.

Her stifled moans through the palm of her hand drove him crazy. Usually, he was a lot more composed than that, but it was late, he was overworked and he was horny, and he couldn’t concentrate with the wetness of her arousal lying thick in the air. He licked his lips to taste it. He tasted the air like a starved man.

Matt growled. “Fuck this,” he said.

She protested silently when he retreated his thumb. She sat up against the armrest, staring at him. His hair stood in all directions from the hand he ran through it, his lips plump, seeking friction.

“Come here.” He grabbed her hips and placed her back on his lap, legs on either side of his thigh. “I need you close to me,” he breathed into her mouth as they met halfway. “Ride my thigh.”

She swallowed. “What?”

“Ride my thigh. Be a good girl and ride my thigh. You want to make yourself cum, hm? I’m giving you an opportunity here, unless, of course, you’re too pathetic to do it yourself. Do you need me to help you, hm?”

She swallowed again. “Please,” she said.

His hands gently began to roll her hips against him. “Like that?” he asked.

The moan she let out was answer enough.

“Feel good?”

She bit into her lip, nodding wildly.

“Use your words,” he said. “Don’t hold back.”

Her head fell on his shoulder, hand seeking something to hold onto behind him at the back of the couch.

The silence earned her another hard slap on her ass.

“Answer me.”

She sighed. “Yes.”

“Yes, what?”

“Feels good. Keep going, please.”

Matt smirked. “Good girl.”

The leather was dented under her fingers. She held onto the couch for dear life. His hands guided her hips deliciously over his thigh, the fabric of his slacks mixed with the silk of her underwear sliding against her sensitive clit over and over again driving her closer and closer to the end.

She saw the light at the end of the tunnel. Her eyes rolled back. The pressure in her lower abdomen began to build slowly but steadily. She involuntarily sped up, sloppily fighting against the slow pace he’d set. He would’ve stopped her if he hadn’t been so riled up already, so he let her. He let her chase for the sweet relief the knot in her stomach prepared her for.

“Matt,” she whined his name.

One of his hands began to stroke her back. “I know,” he said. “I know, baby.”

Her thighs twitched around his, her entire body shaking underneath his touch. It was all too much. His rough hands on her hot skin, his fingers digging in sure to leave bruises, and the gentle coax of his hand on her back, stroking innocently to help her through it. His touch was too much to bear.

Matt instantly reached out when she threw her head back. The moan sounded delicious in his ears. He caught her head with his hand around the back of her neck, making sure she wouldn’t fall over and hurt herself. She clenched around nothing, thighs threatening to close but his own kept them open.

A tear slipped down her cheek. She wasn’t crying, not at all. The tear came from a place of pure pleasure. Her body couldn’t handle it. The sensations he put her through left her speechless every time he touched her. She couldn’t breathe. Her throat was dry.

His thumb drew circles on the back of her neck. He brought her back to earth after it just shattered before her very eyes.

“Fuck,” she choked out.

Matt guided her back into his chest and she took the support gladly. His heart beat against her bare breasts. The bulge in his pants became painfully clear once she regained feeling in her limbs. It brushed her thighs where it lay between his own.

“You okay?” he asked.

She nodded, playing with the hairs on the nape of his neck.

“That was…” she couldn’t find the right words.

“I know.”

She didn’t quite trust her legs when she twisted to swing the one between his thighs over the other one. She kept her hands on his shoulders to straddle him without falling over.

Matt tilted his head, eyes searching for hers. “What’re you doing?” he asked hoarsely.

“Looks like you need some help,” she stated. She played with his belt buckle.

“It’s fine. You know I don’t need anything in return for making you feel good.”

“I know, but I want to. That looks painful.”

In one swift motion, she pulled the belt out of his slacks and tossed it aside.

Matt chuckled at her eagerness. “You are insatiable, you know that?” he dove in to kiss whatever bare skin he could reach.

His lips sloppily kissed down her neck and up again, chasing her lips. She kissed him back as hard as she could. Their teeth clashed, tongues fighting each other for dominance, knowing he’d win anyway. He swallowed every breath she took, sucking her dry and breathing new life back into her mouth.

She opened the button on his pants, trying hard to pull it down enough to get his aching cock out of them.

He caught onto her plan. Shifting his hips, she managed to reach into his boxers.

“Wait,” he said.

“What?” she blinked at him.

Matt reached for the hem of her panties. His fingers flexed.

Rip.

She gasped. The silk fell to the floor in nothing but flaps of fabric.

“I’ll buy you new ones.” He sucked her bottom lip into his mouth.

“Fine.” In response, the buttons of his dress shirt flew in all directions. She ran her hands down his chest, satisfied with the ripped front of the shirt hanging loosely off his shoulders.

He chuckled. “That’s fair.”

She kissed down every exposed sliver of skin on his torso. Her tongue ran over the jagged scars, the freshly healed bruises from a couple of nights ago. He was beautiful. With the billboard casting a pornographic red light on them, eyes closed, he looked like the child of an angel and a demon. His entire existence was ephemeral, his body a wonderland.

She sucked one of his perky nipples into her mouth. He arched almost entirely off the couch.

“I love you,” she breathed against him.

She liked the way the words sounded. For someone so afraid of admitting her feelings not so long ago, she’d come quite far. It had become her new favorite thing to say. Though the true weight of the statement came in the moments they were intimate. She could chant the same three words to him all day, but the second they were close to each other, touching where only they could touch, those three words regained their true meaning. It was sweet, almost innocent. The kind of love everyone wished for. An endless spiral of butterflies danced around in their stomachs.

Matt chuckled. The very same sound turned into a moan once her teeth dug into the flesh around his nipples.

“I’m worshipping you now,” she told him. Her kisses traveled down his body.

Her warmth on his chest disappeared. Instead, the hot trail of kissed lead to the opened button of his slacks. Her tongue played with his belly button, the happy trail leading into Neverland.

She kissed each scar on either side. “Perfect,” she hummed. “I don’t deserve you and yet you’re mine. This is mine. Only mine. No one else’s.”

“I’m yours.”

“Mine,” she kissed the lower part of his stomach. “Mine,” her lips landed on the hem of his boxers. “Mine,” it was an animalistic growl. She pulled down his underwear swiftly.

Matt didn’t have time to comprehend what was happening. He was so in awe of the way she touched and spoke of his body, he listened to her for the sake of having her praise him over and over again. The words carried innocence in their sinful ways.

He choked on air. His scars long forgotten, her mouth opened around its original destination.

“Lord have mercy!” he grabbed a fistful of hair.

Her tongue licked a thick stripe down his shaft.

Matt was a religious man. He prayed regularly and went to church and Sunday Mass. He swore never to take God anywhere other than he needed to be, but that woman and her cursed mouth made him see God in the fiery land of his unseeing vision. What they were doing was outright sinful. He knew he’d go to hell for saying the lord’s name in vain. He’d go to hell for everything he’d ever done and yet, while that was the truth, he didn’t care because, at that moment, he was living. He was alive. He’d gotten used to the thought of going to hell, seeking penance almost every day since. With her though, something had awakened inside of him. He couldn’t let it go. The Devil inside of him wanted to play.

Her mouth danced perfectly to the gospel of his moans, he forgot who he was. He tried hard not to push her head further down his cock, although the warmth of her throat sent him into pleasurable overdrive.

The cold air hit the head, falling from her lips like a wet towel. “It’s okay,” she said. “Take what you need.”

It was all the confirmation he needed.

His hips bucked up into her throat. She had laid off the gag reflex the first time she had his cock in her mouth, knowing the act alone could turn her on for more than one day. She could cum from simply touching him, hearing the dirty sounds slip past his swollen lips, and she’d be more than okay with it. The sounds he made were heaven’s gift to her, she was sure.

His cock twitched against her throat. She braced herself, eyes already closed. 

“Stop,” he choked out.

She instantly sat back on her heels, naked and worked up.

“Did I do something wrong?” she asked.

“No, not at all.  I just… I need you.”

His chest heaved with the denied orgasm. The one he had denied himself. Anticipation rutted through his veins.

She swallowed the precum mixed with spit inside her hollowed-out mouth. The skin tingled. “You want me to-“ she pointed to his lap.

Matt sensed the motion. “If you want to,” he said. “But you can lay back and let me do all the work if that’s what you want. Just tell me what you want and I’ll give it to you.”

Her thighs trapped his. She’d never been so comfortable doing that before. She was completely naked on top of him while he sat there, half-dressed, eyes searching for what he couldn’t see. Blood rushed to her cheeks. The position was compromising.

He pulled the hair from her face. “Are you sure about this?” he asked.

“Yes,” she nodded. “I don’t know what I’m doing but yeah, I’m sure.”

“You don’t have to. I’ve got you.” He pressed his lips to her collarbone. “Mine,” he licked a stripe up her pulse point. “Mine,” the spank landed right on her ass. The next touch of his fingers made her shudder. Her cheeks flooded red with blood. “And mine,” he parted his fingers between her thighs to spread the lips of her pussy wide open.

Part of her wanted to scramble away. He couldn’t see but he could feel everything. It was just about the same as having him watch every inch of her body closely. Every last crevice he wanted to memorize. She wasn’t sure what to think. Her brain refused to function. She was entirely bare to him.

“Matt,” she said his name.

“You’re beautiful. Nothing to be ashamed of.” He kissed her again. Passionate, loving. “Remember our safe word?”

“Hmm.”

“Tell me.”

“Red.”

He flicked the switch. “Okay, good girl,” the dark sound of his voice made all the embarrassment vanish. Instead, heat shot through her core. “Good girl, having your good little cunt spread for me. Just want to look at you the way I can. Want to see what’s mine. Want to feel how wet you are from riding my thigh. Oh, look at you!” he smirked. “This is turning you on, isn’t it? Your heart’s going crazy and you’re literally dripping.  You’re making such a mess on my good pants. You want to make a mess on my cock now too, don’t you? You want to be my good little slut and ride my cock?”

She only whined.

His hand slapped across her ass harder this time. The collision stung. “Use your words,” he demanded. “Use your words or I’m leaving you like this.”

“I’m sorry,” her voice came out sobbing. “I’m sorry. I want you inside of me. I want to be your good girl, I promise.”

“Yeah?” he asked.

“Yes, please! Please fuck me, Matthew. I’ll do anything. Please!”

“Don’t cry.” He wiped her cheeks. “I know I’m good, but no need to cry. You’ll get what you want. Want to make you feel good, hm. You deserve it for always being so patient.”

“Yes, I’ve been patient. I’ve been good. So good.”

He laughed. “You’re already so dumb for me, baby. You sure you can take this?”

“Yes!”

“What’s your color?” The always caring Matt Murdock peaked out from under the dark, sex-crazed facade only she got to see.

She shuddered. “I-“ words came harder than they should have.

His head titled. Worry spread across his face, ready to take back whatever he said.

“Green,” she eventually managed to say.

She only wanted the ache between her thighs to be numbed. She wanted him so incredibly deep inside of her, she could feel him bulge her stomach, everywhere he could be inside of her.

Matt smirked, and it only grew darker from there.

“Good girl,” he praised again.

She slapped her hand on her mouth. He bottomed out quickly, without warning. He penetrated her without thinking twice about it, burying himself so deep inside of her, he could feel her walls contracting around him with every inch. She sucked him in and she screamed. She was sure she screamed. Her hand was the only thing keeping the neighbors from knocking on their door. His name slipped from her lips like a prayer, like she was singing his name in church and the word echoed off the walls for everyone to hear. Except no one was supposed to hear this. It was just them. This was their safe space. They could be however they wanted to be like this, and only then they could touch each other so sweetly when the world wasn’t watching them and they didn’t have to worry about anything other than themselves.

The sound was new, even for Matt. He too was sure he let out the nastiest sound known to man, but unlike her, he had no intention of masking it. He bottomed out and he chose to stay like this for just a little while longer, waiting for her muscles to relax, waiting for her to enjoy this.

The impatient roll of her hips eased his worries.

“Okay?” he asked quietly.

She breathed through her nose, “Okay.”

“Then ride me.”

And she did.

She started with a slow pace, taking her time to adjust to his size. Every inch of her felt perfectly filled out. He managed to reach parts of her she never could’ve found on her own. He had this way with her body, it was like a high that never ended, the endless train on the river of sugar rush.

Her eyes trailed up his body. Head tilted back, his eyes fluttered with every thrust of her hips. One arm flexed with the pressure he applied to the leather seat, the other was placed softly against the flesh of her hips. He made sure she knew he was there if she needed him to take control, though, at the same time, the move seemed almost domineering, leaving her no choice but to do as he wanted. She was completely at his mercy. Even the slightest touch made her cave. He knew it and she knew it.

If he’d told her to drive to hell with him, she would have.

The slow and steady pace felt like heaven to him. Her hips drew patterns to chase that spot so very deep inside of her, only he could reach it. The swirl was delicious around his cock, the hot, soft flesh of her insides rolling against him, up and down and up and down. He listened to her heartbeat, strangled breathing, and the goosebumps on her skin. Moan after moan escaped her lips, growing louder and louder until she couldn’t hold it anymore. He filtered out every hint of discomfort or frustration. What she liked, what she continued doing, and what just didn’t seem to work. She explored herself without even realizing and it turned him on even more. He could’ve sworn he felt himself getting harder inside of her if that was humanly possible.

His ears only picked up on rushing blood and labored breaths. There was nothing else but the feeling of her body, the scent of sweat, and bittersweet arousal on his lips and tongue. He was entirely enveloped in her. Everything was about her. Her body, her wetness, her heart. The heart between her legs, loud and dominant.

She whimpered at the sight before her. Matt Murdock in all his glory, half naked with his shirt ripped at her fingers, fabric, and skin clutched between her nails. Sweat coated his forehead, mouth slightly agape. His lashes fluttered around his unseeing eyes. She didn’t even have to move. If she wanted to, the sight would’ve been enough to make her come undone in a matter of seconds. He was so comfortable in her presence, his shoulders slouched in absolute relaxation as her movement urged him closer to his own release.

The next time her hips rolled down into his, he met her movements. His hips jerked up with a purpose. That purpose lay deep inside of her and he knew where it was. The thrust from underneath made her cry out. The spongy spot inside of her danced with euphoria as the head of his cock brushed against it.

He chuckled breathlessly. “There it is,” his head stayed hung over the back of the couch.

She braced herself. The new wave of pleasure only spurred her on. The way he dove impossibly deeper into her with every brush against that sweet spot had him reeling, gripping the leather for any kind of support. She followed close behind, her hips beginning to move as if her life depended on it. With every thrust, she sped up. Although her legs slowly grew tired, all she could feel was the tingling knot deep in her stomach blossoming into a beautiful flower and waiting to blow.

The hand that had once laid around her waist landed around her throat instead. The leather wasn’t nearly enough to keep him composed if that was even possible.

Hell’s Kitchen always haunted him. Noise and smell followed him home, and the sound of innocent people getting hurt kept him from falling asleep most of the time. He couldn’t tune it out. The city was a part of him. Even asleep, he dreamed of all the bad that was out there and all the things he’d done in his life, the things that lead him there, the people he’d hurt. The city never slept and neither did he, not really.

Though with her, for the first time, he was able to breathe. She overwhelmed his senses to the point it almost became unbearable. Her touch singed his skin yet calmed his mind down to the point he could tune out everything else and just focus entirely on the woman atop him. Sight was overrated. He didn’t need to see to know the way she moved was graceful in itself. Everything she did, she did with passion. The rolls of her hips were angelic. With her head thrown back, sweat and tear all over her face, she was the most beautiful person he’d ever come across. He could feel every inch of her, smell her, taste her. The whole wide city disappeared in the wake of her existence.

She was his salvation. He was drowning.

“Matt,” she sighed. His name rolled sweetly over her lips like she was singing him to sleep.

He squeezed his fingers around her pulse point. The pressure caged her in, sending moons across the stars in her galaxy. She reached for his wrist, not sure if she wanted to keep him or push him away. The tingling traveled from her stomach into every last crevice of her being.

He twitched inside of her. His muscles tensed. She rolled against him again, chest to chest. Hard nipples brushed against each other.

She dove in for a taste. Sweat had nestled into his stubble. Air was overrated. She kissed him until her lungs had nothing left to give. Until there was no other way but to swim back to shore to take a deep breath.

They’d fucked before. They had sex before. They’d done a lot of things. Whatever this was though, it counted as neither. Time was of the essence. Not too little, not too much. Just the right amount of time, simply savoring each other, getting to know each other as much as humanly possible in the most intimate sense. Subconsciously, they’d both been carrying way too much pressure. It showed in the way they craved each other. Starving animals in the middle of the desert preying for sustenance.

She scratched her nails through the hairs on his chin, leaving red marks down his throat. He groaned ever so softly into the depths of her mouth.

“I love you,” she said. His name came in serial moans. She breathed hard, heavy. Lost all sense of space and time, as if she couldn’t even believe it herself.

Matt tasted the salt on his tongue, wet strains of tears carried from her drenched cheeks to his. She was crying, whining, begging, and as lovely as it was to hold her like this, the words were the last straw to destroy his composure completely.

“I love you.”

He flipped her over like she was a doll, easily handled, thighs opened to grant him the space he needed to get between them. All the while his hand remained on its throne around her throat.

She moaned. The red lights of the billboard shone at him from behind, fading into hues of purple and blue with each thrust. His hips brushed against her clit every time he dove forward, hard and relentless, deeper and deeper. She couldn’t see, couldn’t breathe. The lights became a distant memory. Nothing mattered but the hot pressure inside her lower abdomen, his weight on her, the twitch of his cock against the spot inside of her at the same time he brushed the spot outside of her and all eventually just became too much.

“Sweetheart, look at me,” he demanded. “Look at me!”

She forced her eyes open. He loved it when she looked at him, vulnerable, exposed. And though she tried hard to obey, his pace made it almost impossible to keep her eyes open long enough. Not much longer and the only was about to snap.

“Who do you belong to? Who’s making you feel good?”

“You,” she gave him the answer he wanted. “Always you.”

“That’s right, sweetheart. Me, only me. You’re-“ he thrust his hips forward, “Mine. Mine.” he dug his teeth into her shoulder.

She sobbed. It was too much. Too good, too much. Her entire body was on fire.

“Matt, please.”

Waiting for permission, anything.

Fingers intertwined above her head on the armrest. She clawed onto him. His hand traveled down between their bodies, catching her clit just right between his fingers. Just a little more. Circles and triangles and more circles.

“All of this is mine, understood?” his face buried in the valve of her breasts. “I’m so in love with you,” he said. “So fucking in love with you.”

The Billboard outside exploded in fits of color. The coil snapped. She gave up the little control she had left, clinging onto him, shocks of pleasure wreaking havoc. Her pussy clenched around him. It was tight, so tight, and she kept him there until she could milk all he had to give her.

Matt stiffened. His mouth stayed open in a silent moan. Sound only came back to him once he came, hard. All the pressure from the week before unloaded and he fell on top of her, moaning, panting. His body vibrated with the aftershocks. The heat inside of her walls sucked him in until every last drop was spent, dripping along his softening shaft, out of her. 

The world stood still.

“I love you,” the admission blew hot against her sternum. Her hands raked through his hair, holding him.

She sighed blissfully. “I know.”

“I love you.”

“I know.”

Matt was a sensitive person after sex. During, he took control. He hardly left her any time to breathe or think. After though, the world came crashing back in, his senses so overwhelmed by everything, he just needed someone to ground him. His mind wasn’t back yet, ears rushing with blood and every nerve in his body straining. The only thing keeping him sane was the beating of her heart against his ear.

Not sure if she could trust her legs just yet, she gently rolled them over. “Come on,” she whispered. “I’ll clean us up.”

He lay there, eyes directed at the ceiling. Her warmth disappeared only to be replaced by a lukewarm washcloth on his stomach.

She helped him out of his pants. The cold air of the apartment eased the burning.

He had regained most of his consciousness by the time she laid back on top of him. The sofa wasn’t spacious and for the first time, he was glad there was no space for her to move anywhere but his bare chest. The skin-to-skin contact made the sudden awareness less unbearable. He needed to focus on the feeling of her. He needed to remember what it felt like to breathe.

She traced patterns on his skin. Eventually, she asked, “You okay?”

“Thank you,” he said.

“You know, I love you too. More than anything.”

“I know.”

“I’m in love with you,” she looked up at him. “I don’t just love you, I’m in it. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

He couldn’t help it. “Oh,” the tears flowed freely.

“Hey-“

Matt choked out a laugh. “You’re the best damn thing that’s ever happened to me,” he said. "And I don't even know why I'm crying because I'm not sad, I'm happy."

Her eyes softened. She touched his cheek gently. He closed his eyes, leaning into her touch, kissing her palm, down to her wrist, and back up.

“I was thinking,” she broke the silence.

“Dangerous,” he muttered.

“Hey!” she slapped him only slightly, but it was enough to make him groan.

“I was thinking,” she began again. “How about, you and I,” her fingers traveled down his exposed chest, “take the day off tomorrow, stay in,” she kissed his throat, “and have absolutely filthy sex everywhere in this apartment until I can’t walk anymore.”

He moaned. “That won’t be so hard,” he said.

Needless to say, he didn’t buy any kitchen supplies that day, the day after that, or the day after that. Truth be told, she never got the chance to buy them.

“We can start today.”

The second they stepped into the shower, her chest was pressed to the cold tiles as he took her from behind.

Even if she’d wanted to, the throbbing between her legs the next morning made shopping for something as useless as kitchen supplies an impossibility. And as she sat on the kitchen counter in the morning, back arched with his head buried deep between her thighs, she realized she wouldn’t regain feeling in her limbs anytime soon.

[istoleyoursk1n]

Could I request a durge who, while they have more control of their urges than most other Bhaalspawn, will sometimes blurt the urges out in conversation to try and get someone to help them stop doing it just in case they try? It's half sweet and half chaotic, because on one hand, aw durge trusts them! But also, durge and the character were just having a nice evening stroll in a park when they turned to the character and bluntly said "Can you tie me down before I kill that couple over there?"

With Roland, Dammon and Wyll please!

•❅───────────✧❅✦❅✧───────────❅•

How would Rolan, Dammon, and Wyll react to a Durge who blurts out their urges?

Context: Durge starts blurting unhinged things out like “Can you tie me down before I kill that could over there?!” (I find this so funny)

.

.

: ̗̀➛ ROLAN

“Gods damnit again?! What is it, the fourth time this week?! Can you behave enough to whisper when you utter those violent little thoughts of yours? It's like you want every damn person here to hear you! You’re embarrassing us both y’know!”

You what?! <— His live reaction caught in 4k

He’s well aware of your urges by now but they never fail to startle him. You always seem to blurt them out during the worst times too. He’s spilled his drink once because of you!

He goes from having to quickly shush your mouth by placing his own hand over it, to not so subtly scooting you away from everyone, and then having to use every damn magic trick in the book just to keep you from lunging at people.

He seems more annoyed than scared to be honest, having to scold you once again about ‘not ruining happy couples’ and to ‘stop trying to bite that dwarves leg’.

The whole situation ends up looking like both of you play fighting or Rolan trying to tend to a rabid dog. Either way, it's absolutely hilarious to everywhere who may bear witness to it all.

Eventually, when he's managed to get you to calm down, he’d be able to help talk things out with you, finding out proper ways on how this ‘urge’ of yours could be tamed without the need of you hurting yourself or others.

To his dismay, he cares for you deeply and despite it all, he’d be willing enough to help you through each and every one of your urges no matter how much of a hassle it all is to overcome.

And hey! If someone truly does piss him off, he has you to rely on to immediately go chasing after the poor soul with bared teeth.

: ̗̀➛ DAMMON

“Hells, just hold onto me okay? We’ll get you home and away from this crowd if you think the urges are getting far too overwhelming. Don't you worry, we’ll be back in no time, just squeeze my hand and it’ll all be alright.”

He kind of just stood there awkwardly at first when he first heard you blurt out your urges. He’s so surprised by them that he needs to blink five times before actually processing what you just said.

It would be during the most unsuspecting times too like whenever the both of you were relaxing together side by side whilst eating a nice warm meal then suddenly you’d say something along the lines of ‘dwarf tastes better’.

He’s very much concerned about you and your mental state but he cares for you enough to listen and lend you a hand whenever you do decide to blurt out your urges.

At least then it gives him a clear sign as to when he should be tying you down or locking you in a room for the day.

He hates having to tie you up when your urges get worse, seeing you lash about and growl at him just pains him because he can't imagine the amount of stress you actually going through just to hold yourself back.

He’s probably been scratched by you a few times while he was trying to calm you down but he never once took it against you. Instead, those became his favorite scars all cause they came from you.

He would stay with you no matter how dangerous you say you are. He’d make sure that you’d have food and he’d feed you every time you’re mind was too scattered to eat yourself during the moments when you had to be tied up; for even the fear of dying by your hands does not scare him.

Though it does become an actual shitshow during the times he actually has to wrestle you down. It's funny to watch but Gods does it exhaust him.

: ̗̀➛ WYLL

“By the hells, Is it that time again? Alright, calm down, just breathe with me okay? You're going to be just fine. Now quickly, let's get you somewhere safe before the worst comes to show, I doubt you’d want that poor couple overhearing what you said.”

He goes wide-eyed concerned for a moment as soon as your violent urges suddenly come out of your mouth. He truly could never not be shocked for when and where you say such things.

He’s somehow extremely prepared for it though that it's mildly concerning.

The first step is to take you away from any person aside from him in sight, if you are close to home, even better! But ideally, he either takes you to a secluded forest or an alleyway.

Next, he very gently restrains you whilst reassuring you that everything is going to be just fine. Better to restrain you while you're still in control of your own thoughts rather than when you go full-on feral mode.

He even has a timer for it. If for an hour or so you don't act up and remain calm then he lets you go but if you start lashing out then he knows it’s time for him to probably pull an all-nighter just to make sure you and the others don't get hurt. Note that either way, he stays with you.

He’ll be your number-one supporter in helping you control and contain your violent urges, always giving you hope in times when all you can see is blood red.

He’ll always have a plate of food ready for you when the urges finally settle and you’re back in the right state of mind. Perhaps even a warm bath if you're both in the comforts of your home.

Truth be told, the real reason he stays by your side is not just cause he cares but because one moment he looked away for about ten seconds, and you suddenly disappeared. The poor man nearly had a panic attack.

•❅───────────✧❅✦❅✧───────────❅•

[starry-bi-sky]

honestly your dpxdc clone au gives me life, its adorable as all hell and im a sucker for found family but with that being said, its so freaking hysterical to me that Danny is going full feral liminal menace at Wes any time hes near and Wes himself is still 100% into it the freak (affectionate) and thats not even pointing out the paralles it could possible create since danny and dames gives massive parallels to dick and damian and dick does have a thing for redheads.

yeesSSSSS! I was planning on hoarding this to myself but i can't not reply. and i'll be able to find this again with the clone^2 tag so win WIN. i'm so glad you are as delighted by this as me. It's so hilarious to me that Danny just becomes a complete freak whenever he spots Wes, and I'm the one who wrote it into existence. Like- like i don't know how to explain my vision in words but like, its like Danny sees Wes and immediately goes 'what can I do to make his day worse'. And then he goes and does it.

(honorary read more because i talk a lot)

He's relatively normal around his friends too, which makes him going full-fledged unhinged around Wes even funnier to me. Like, Danny will spout weird shit sometimes to Sam and Tucker, but usually its prefaced with him talking about patrol or there would be context before he said anything. With Wes? Though?? he will just. say anything, completely unprompted. Slings an arm around his shoulder like they've been buddies since primary school and then spits out a weird new fun fact he learned about the bodily anatomy while researching his latest cold case. All vaguely-threatening but utterly insane things to say as way to start a conversation.

And sometimes its not even that, he'll walk up to Wes and ask him if he saw the latest daytime fight between Phantom and Skulker. And then he'll say "yeah i missed it myself but I saw clips of it being posted online" and then watch Wes mentally explode him with his mind. or he'll disparage Phantom for having such a young partner with him, "Can you believe he'd let a kid fight ghosts with him? I'd never let my brother ghosthunt with me if I was Phantom."

All of this with such a deceptive look on his face but the most delighted, shit-eating gleam in his eyes. Wes is chewing glass and he wants to yell that he does let his brother fight ghosts with him. Also you told him yourself that nothing would've stopped your demonic (Wes' words) little brother from joining you.

Damian gets in on the fuckery occasionally, but since he's not around often with Wes about, it doesn't happen nearly as often as it does between Wes and Danny. Sam and Tucker know he's screwing with him too, and both of them are a little wary about him being careless with his secret id. But he's been doing this since he was 14-ish and it hasn't backfired yet. So. They're not actively stopping him.

Danny walks back to his lunch table after terrorizing Wes and Tucker just asks him what he said, because Wes was about as red as a tomato when he walked away. Danny offhandedly sighs and innocently says he tried to have a conversation about Phantom with him. Wes didn't seem to like it all that much. Weird.

And yes, yes. Wes is totally into it and is slightly enraged about this fact, because not even he knows why he's into it. The freak (affectionate). Danny gives him this troublemaker smirk, and i did say smirk, and Wes doesn't know whether or not if he wants to smack him or kiss him. Or both. Like, yeah, pine, white boy, pine.

(And this is a dramatized image but I'm also highly entertained by the idea that Wes keeps getting routine dirty looks from various peers because they, too, have a crush on Fenton. Except Fenton doesn't talk to anyone else unless its his friends and sometimes Valerie, and Weston, the guy who keeps accusing him of being the local vigilante, is somehow routinely having conversations with him?? And BLOWING IT?? Like everyone else thinks he's fumbling so bad, and yet fenton keeps tALKING to him.)

And yes!! i'm always so pleased whenever someone brings up the parallels D+D have to Dick and Damian, because that was lowkey my intention when I was making the solo clone damian au. Although it was supposed to be more implied since I don't really know much about Damian and Dick other than they're very close and Dick was Damian's Batman for a year. And then of course the very smaller parallel (??) 'what if' between Bruce and Damian and D+D in clone^2 considering who they are both clones of.

And man this just makes me want to talk about when batfam meet D+D because I just want them to see D+D be so brotherly towards each other. Like I want them to see Bby Dames wearing his goofy fun fact shirts and stealing Danny's hoodies/flannels/etc and blatantly lying about it when Danny asks. Only for Danny to then throw him over his shoulder like Tadashi from BH3 and jump around.

And also. I do not know what Damian Wayne's (DW as I'll call him) stance on being called "Dami" is - the general consensus I've seen is that its usually used as a playful nickname in order to get a rise out of him, and he doesn't really like it.

But baby Dames being called that freely, and often, and its sometimes used to get a rise out of him but thats typically what nicknames do. Its used as easily as his full name is with the same amount of affection. And its like his main go-to nickname. "Dami" and "Dames" with the occasional "Bud/Buddy", "Squirt", "Little man", etc. Not once is he ever called 'demon-spawn'

(which i know is a fanon nickname but its a relatively popular nickname)

but yeah, uhhh. i think thats all of my thoughts on the matter. for now lmAO

[m3r1m4r5u333]

I was thinking of the episode titles in season 7 in relation to Buddie.

7x01 "Abandon ships" basically has them abandoning their current relationships, right?

Buck tells Eddie that he broke up with Natalia.

Also, Eddie needs help co-parenting and instead of asking his girlfriend, he asks Buck to talk with Chris.

The way they combine Eddie's and Marisol's date with Christopher's, and then Eddie muses about the date feeling just friendly when the camera is actually focused on him and Marisol...

Then Buck brings up sexual tension while he's putting out a fire... And Eddie stares.

---

The emergency in 7x01, introducing the couple at the pool? Feels like a recap of past events.

With the guy passing out mid sex and the woman becoming trapped due to the stress response making her muscles spasm...?

Is truly such a hilarious retelling of Eddie's panic attacks.

The poor woman, still trapped, is basically living the life of Ana Flores:

"I don't even know how this happened. I mean, I know how it happened. We were, you know, doing it, and then he got woozy and started complaining about chest pains, and he went limp. Well, mostly - because every time I try to get free, I can't! What is happening?!"

The team tries to figure out how to help,

Hen comes to the conclusion that the medical emergency does not appear to be a heart attack (much like Eddie's panic attacks weren't either) and then states that

"What we need to do, is get him out of this hot water!"

(Hot water, indeed.)

The woman begs for help because she does not wish to have an embarrassing hospital trip.

The parallel - remember the cringy conversation at the hospital, when the doctor & the people in the room were trying to figure out what could be making Eddie so stressed, and Eddie reveals his hand by looking at Ana. Embarrassing all around!

So the team at the pool tries to come up with a solution, and decide they should help her relax.

Eddie's watching the pool scene unfold and is then like

"(*sighs*) This is the story of my fucking life. Okay, I got this. I know how to deal with panic attacks!"

So he orders Buck to switch with Hen, to get Buck closer.

So the first step to the road to recovery and getting out of panic mode is Buck getting closer! (And he did, didn't he. Eddie talked with Buck, then broke up with Ana, and Eddie was able spend more time with Buck again.)

Then Eddie asks if Buck's "got him?" (meaning the man who's collapsed), Buck does.

Then Eddie rambles on about a game called Jell-o body, to get the woman to relax. Apparently that's how Eddie also calms himself down (which is a fun fact I did not know I needed, but I will cherish it to the grave anyway).

I'm not entirely sure what the "lime jell-O" reference could mean, but after some obsessed googling, I'm thinking it means incompatible ingredients - components which do not work well together.

These absolutely mad jell-o recipes used to be a thing, and also ridiculed. Go listen to "Lime Jello Marshmallow Cottage Cheese Surprise", if you haven't, it's pretty funny.

Anyway. Would make sense in the context I'm seeing here. Picturing lime jell-O is what brings the stress level down because it reminds you that it's okay to let go. Some things just aren't meant to be. Like Eddie and Ana weren't!

...

So. Does this mad rambling of mine make any sense to anyone but me? 😅

[crossdressingdeath]

Today on "It is objectively hilarious that Jason and Nico do not tell anyone even a lie about what happened in Croatia": I love the bit where they have that whole exchange re drinking the poison and Nico says "You asked me about trust, and taking a risk? Well, here you go, son of Jupiter. How much do you trust me?" and Jason takes the poisoned chalice and drinks it without hesitation and Frank, whose POV it is, is just like "Well I have no earthly idea what that's about, moving on". Both because Nico calls back to the earlier conversation (which the rest of the group also was not there for) where Jason was like "Maybe take a risk and believe that I actually am your friend" (making this line basically "If you're really my friend drink poison" and Jason just does it without a second thought, it's really no wonder why Nico likes him so much) and because it is this very important exchange about a very personal matter and I'd argue it's a turning point in their relationship (Nico is not used to people trusting him unconditionally just because he asked them to) that they are just having in front of a bunch of people who have zero context and also think Nico is weird and creepy enough when he isn't telling people that if they trust him they should drink poison. Also while it's not mentioned in the narration I choose to believe Jason was making direct eye contact with Nico while he drank the poison just because it has that sort of feel to it and also I feel like it would make the whole thing even weirder for the observing demigods.

[thesherrinfordfacility]

LWA: Going back to a very old conversation, I suddenly realized that Bishop /isn't/ the only one of Aziraphale's "jobs" we haven't seen yet. The other one is garden designer ("deziner"). I think we all just skipped over that and said, yeah, at the Dowlings. But this is from 1941! Assuming he was sticking around England, the most logical time for Aziraphale to be pursuing this line of work would be the eighteenth century, which is the great age of English landscape gardens.

It also subverts fanon a bit. I know that everyone assumes that Crowley has a gift for gardening, but even in the series he knows nothing about plant care and doesn't seem to be aware that he has anything to learn. I've always found the thought of TV!Crowley trying to garden "the human way" to be hilarious, frankly: if he doesn't get why TV!Aziraphale does magic tricks or tries to learn French, he's probably going to have an equally hard time getting why he should go out and weed, instead of just snapping his fingers and making the weeds go poof...

fuck it LWA let's go two-for-two (and my profuse gratitude that it's a less head-scratchy one, thank you)✨

that's a bloody good point; first thing, i always took these to be in chronological order - that's logical, right?

so we have a huge gap between 537AD, and 1800 (presuming of course that aziraphale wasn't a bookseller before he opened the whickber street shop). i love the idea that if aziraphale was in england at the time of being a garden designer, and that it would be around this time period - stepping away from the more french-style landscaped order and neatness, and reviving it to brought back to blend in with nature... plus, the temples!!!

(and here is where i get duly ensconced in looking at pictures of rievaulx terrace and chiswick house)

if he wasn't in england though, i reckon he could have been in italy, because if there were some plans for a minisode placing them in 15th century italy, i feel like some of the design concepts/terminology from this period would fit with aziraphale? god knows im not an expert on historical horticulture, especially that from the italian renaissance, but its a school day - the concept of the villa/house being placed above the gardens for the best view from either point feels pretty on-point. not even going to pretend that i didn't lift this from wikipedia, it just felt too apt:

furthermore, if we do accept that that list is in chronological order, i wonder where aziraphale would have fit in being a bishop between, say, 1750 - 1800? at best?

as for crowley - look. i love the idea in a human AU context that crowley would be a keen gardener, and i do like the thought process that, in canon, we see some kind of sentimentality from him where his plants are concerned (not sure why else he would choose a select few to keep in his car - not if they would otherwise have a good home to go to). but yeah, i otherwise cant quite reconcile crowley with being the demonic equivalent of charlie dimmock - although i bet he gets a kick out of shouting at old ground force reruns from time to time✨

[hisbutler-problematic]

On the topic of Sebastian being completely enthralled about everything Ciel is, I personally love it so much more knowing manga context, because O!Ciel was the 'spare'. He was not supposed to carry the family nane and, frankly, people didn't think he'd be capable of it due to his poor health anyway (Remember Frances and Vincent's conversation in the flashback chapters? It's obvious O!Ciel was quite saddened by what he heard).

By all means, in a twisted way, Sebastian might just be the first person to regard O!Ciel as someone deeply capable, a shiny singularity that doesn't live in anyone's shadow. The adults around him were - tho not unrightfully - seeing his fragility first and foremost while his brother, despite seeing him as worthy, didn't wish for him to leave and forge his own path. R!Ciel's reaction came from childishness sure, but that isn't to say that it didn't feed into the idea that O!Ciel was 'his backup'.

Going off from this, Sebastian is also the one thing in his life and is irrevocably his. Again, twisted, but all O!Ciel built has been under another's name. The manor, the company, the engagement etc. None of them truly his, but his brother's. And the other servants? They are loyal, however ultimately their own people. Sebastian? In an entirely different spot. He'll be there until the end after all.

This is an aspect of their relationship that tugs at my heartstrings so much. It's so toxic and depressing yet strangely soft and tender somewhat at least to me.

Sorry, I just really wanted to pour my thoughts and I appreciate your posts. So here I am!

anon, i’m in love with you

i literally think about this all the time like. that conversation frances and vincent had? imo vincent just flippantly saying "i guess ill just have to give the estate back to the queen lmao" could be taken 2 ways which is: at face value OR (what i think is more likely) vincent just saying what he knows will piss frances off to get her to stop talking. tbh vincent seems like a good dad imo and like he doesnt super underestimate o!ciel (he seemed absolutely fine with the idea of o!ciel going off to london by himself and opening a toy store in the future), but he DOES know that o!ciel is frail and sickly, and it makes me wonder how seriously he considered the idea that o!ciel might inherent the title of the queen's watchdog.

honestly, i feel in some respects, r!ciel treats o!ciel more carefully than their parents. he very much has an attitude of "my baby brother NEEDS me, he cannot survive without me!!" (gasps and shock, to learn it is actually the other way around /s)

all this to say, whether you lean more towards my interpretation or yours, or a fun mix, or whatever, it is undeniable that all of o!ciel's relationships were 'tainted' (for lack of a better term) by his illness and the way it made others view him and treat him.

AND THEN COMES SEBASTIAN

sebastian, who takes one look at o!ciel, and goes "lmao what a fucked up lil dude. time for little a snacky". sebastian, who then sits down to forge a contract with said little dude only to realize Oh Okay So This Child Is Clever. And o!ciel being sickly does kind of come up when they're making the contract, but sebastian focuses more on the actual logistics of that and o!ciel says 'nvm we'll deal w it when it comes up' (which is hilarious imo. he really said a sudden chill can put me on my deathbed but thats a problem for future me).

and then it turns out o!ciel is hella sheltered. but also a huge bitch.

and at this point, all i can assume is sebastian is so bewildered by this experience that the fact that o!ciel is frail and sickly and fragile is like. just another thing about this kid. o!ciel has never made sebastian's life easy and it would be stupid to think he would start now, sebastian thinks as his young master suffers from yet another cold just bc it rained yesterday. "i never knew you had asthma" says sebastian, who has read every medical journal to date on chest colds. "you never asked," says the bane of sebastian's existence.

and the thing is you can say "sebastian is only worried about o!ciel bc if o!ciel dies, he loses his meal" which is true and accurate and tbh if i was sebastian and i had put up w that much, i wouldn't want to lose my meal to a mere cough.

BUT ALSO

then you see the way sebastian is so fascinated and intrigued and bewitched by o!ciel. i think to sebastian the fact that o!ciel is frail and sickly is just another contradiction in the sea of contradictions that makes o!ciel so fascinating. and i think sebastian is the only one who really sees all those contradictions, he's the only one who sees everything that makes up o!ciel. and he loves what he finds.

(not to mention the fact that sebastian is the only person o!ciel allows to see his every aspect. or, well, some he tries to hide, but only because he thinks sebastian will try to use something against him. either way, sebastian is still the only person who he lets see the most of him. because sebastian is the only person who knows who he really is, who he doesnt have to put up a front for. he doesn't have to pretend to be his brother, he doesn't have to worry about being the spare.)

[pumpkincarriage3]

Ace and Deuce Relationship Analysis

I always find Ace's and Deuce's first interaction in the game to be hilarious with further context we are provided later on.

Upon first meeting, Deuce throws a literal cauldron on top of Ace. And then the two proceed to argue with each other over their names -- which is hilarious for multiple reasons. They are apart of the same dormitory and classes, they sleep in the same room together (they're roommates), they have spent at least one night in the same room together, with their two other roommates, and apparently neither of them thought to ask the other for their name? Or they couldn't be bothered to remember the others name even though they're roommates and would have met prior to this? Even though they share all of their classes together?

Just, the idea that they have no idea who the other is at the start of the story is absolutely hilarious. Especially since at the end of the prologue, Deuce remarks how he's stuck with Ace since they share the same dormitory. And it makes me wonder if he was remembering him and Ace share a dorm room, or it's just the fact that he knows that they share the same dormitory? Which that thought just makes me wonder, if he didn't remember they share the same dorm, how that conversation went down once Ace and Deuce realized they were heading towards the same room?

But moving on from that, Deuce and Ace had a rivalry going on from the very beginning. From Deuce throwing a cauldron on Ace. From Ace intentionally saying Deuce's name wrong. To Deuce then throwing Ace at a chandelier. Then there was Dwarves Mine, where Deuce, Ace, and Grimm were all at each others throats throwing the blame around. And Deuce and Ace butting heads because Ace wanted to throw in the towel but Deuce not wanting to give up just yet.

Their personalities are completely conflicting. It probably doesn't help that Ace can probably tell that Deuce is holding back from acting out, which in turn annoys Ace. So, Ace than taunts Deuce to intentionally get Deuce to just be himself, in the worst way possible, which then makes Deuce upset.

But, with that said, it's not like their relationship is just a rivalry. Their relationship isn't just arguing. Because they did form a bond during the events of what happened at Dwarves Mine. Because they both had to actively work together and watch each others backs. They had to rely on each other so they didn't die. And it worked. Them working together, with both Yuu and Grimm, helped them accomplish their goals.

This bond is part of the reason why Deuce goes to check up on Ace once he finds out what happened with him and Riddle. Because they just went through a life-or-death scenario and Deuce wakes up to find that Ace is gone and nowhere to be found. He might have been confused, may have momentarily thought that since Crowley had finished the paperwork that they were expelled and he just hadn't said anything, he might have panicked. Or he may have felt none of these things and just wanted to go over and poke fun at Ace since Ace had kept poking fun at him. Poking fun at something he's insecure about, even if Ace doesn't realize exactly what he's doing.

But, Deuce does help out Ace with him being collared. He goes back to Heartslabyul and paints some of the roses. He goes out of his way to go to Heartslabyul to talk to Riddle with Ace even though he knows Riddle is in a foul mood. Of course, that's not to say that Deuce helps Ace with everything selflessly. When it came to collect chestnuts to make a new tart, Deuce didn't offer his help until it was confirmed that he would get to try a tart to. But he did stand up with Ace once he thought Riddle was being unreasonable, and even got his own-self collared.

As time goes on, because they experience so many life-or-death experiences, they naturally gravitate towards one another. They naturally hang out with one another. It's this same reason why they get along so well with Yuu and Grimm. The fact that they share the same dorm room, the same dormitory and all of the same classes just adds to that. But because of this, they also don't get a whole lot of time away from each other, which allows for some frustration to build on their parts.

Because they do genuinely care for each other. One can see this in the Endless Halloween Event, where Ace was worried about, Yuu, Grimm and Deuce. It's just sometimes their relationship comes off more as frenemies than friends.

And apart of this, as I said earlier, is because of how they conflict. Ace wants Deuce to be completely honest with himself and not restrain himself to a role that doesn't completely suit him, so he constantly pokes at and taunts Deuce to bring that Deuce out into the open. Contrastly, when Ace teases Deuce, it pisses Deuce off. Especially since Ace has the tendency to hit the nail right on all of Deuce's insecurities in a way of provoking Deuce into just being himself. But because of who they both are, neither of them have actually properly said something to one another.

Which causes that frustration to fester to the point that Deuce goes to the beach and screams his frustrations out. The two are good friends, and genuinely care for one another, but they should probably sit down and speak with one another before the other snaps. 

[mommyashtoreth]

not aboit cro&azi but: opinion on the shallowness and frankly odd pacing of nina and maggies relationship? like one day theyre having stilted conversation, the next maggie is crying over how in love she is.

Hmm. Strokes my wizard's beard. Good question. Good Omens fans have caught on to how much I love the sound of my own voice but not on to the other facet of my deeply annoying yet hilarious and charming personality, which is that I love being contrarian. So, in that fashion, I must disagree with this assessment. As we discovered last night it's been a while since I've watched goomer (I may rewatch it soon, I may not, who knows) but I still think it's abundantly clear that Maggie has a huge crush on Nina from afar, and uh. this is gonna sound crazy but when you have huge unrequited crushes on people it can make you nervous and awkward when you talk to them. Idk I come from an Az-and-Crowley school of relationships myself, where you hang out with someone for eight kajillion years as Totally Platonic Girl Best Friends until one day you just fucking snap you NEED to fuck them so badly, but lots of people experience relationships the way Maggie does, it's a suuuuper common romance trope, and that doesn't make it bad writing! I think we're just so used to seeing this kind of trope be applied to straight relationships and the "platonic gal pals for eight kajillion years until one day you just fucking snap" thing be applied to gay relationships that people aren't ready for this "awkward stuttering and blushing because he looked at me! He let me borrow his pencil!" sort of trope being applied to a wlw relationship. I don't really think their relationship is oddly paced at all, it feels "awkward" because it IS awkward. Nina is someone who, like, barely knows Maggie exists, was in a presumably-monogamous relationship up until very recently, and got a bunch of water dumped on her and then had a trade meeting turned into a Regency ball because these two freaks who are her and Maggie's narrative foils can't just talk to each other normal. And she reacts normally to that I think! I don't think their relationship is badly written (it's probably paced better than, like, Newt and Anathema's, for instance, but I understand the difference in tone between s1 and s2 making those feel like two different cases), it's just yknow, under weird circumstances. Idk I just think it's funny how many goomenheads are completely convinced that Crowley is somehow in total unrequited gay love with Aziraphale (who literally wants him back so badly it makes me sick), and yet I'm here talking about how Maggie is kind of in semi-unrequited gay love with Nina and that's Fine. It's a good character thing. They parallel Az and Crowley in a lot of ways (a romantic obsessed with something near-obsolete who Doesn't Drink and a fast-living cynic who deals with bad shit by instantly initiating Wine Drunk With No Man To Feel Up Wednesday; they're even cast to kind of Look similar which I think is funny), but the structure and context of their relationship is not the same and thus cannot be compared. It's not a Writing Flaw or a Plot Hole or anything to me, it's just the simple difference between "crush before friends" and "friends before crush"

[sapphyreopal5]

I think would be a great idea for you to make a video talking about Gen and Danneel doing black magic. I think people would be interested in your conversation with the psychic guy by your guys messaging each other. After I did read of screenshots from your last post. I am hooked and hungry for want know more information about it, plus I want your opinion about Gen too.

By the way, did the psychic guy message you again? Because I am dying to know what he said more about Danneel and Jensen.

Hello Anon, thank you for the ask. So he and I have been talking some. Some of the same stuff has been said by him multiple but also by me in different words in multiple posts. For a point of reference, this is the first of these screenshots I posted regarding Danneel and Gen's black magic. I have a few more messages I will share below as well. He and I did talk about Hilarie Burton. I know quite a few anti Danneel folks here don't like Hilarie as well, some have said she comes across as fake and such. Interesting fact about Hilarie, she is actually not an incarnated demon like Danneel is but is instead an incarnated dark Faye. Hmmm, does Danneel in fact have a brunette lover or did she just hang out with a brunette? Some people might think she is in fact talking about Steve, which a lot of fellow anti Danneel bloggers here would know about ha ha. The psychic guy did tell a little more about Danneel's said illnesses and a couple more things.

I just might make a video Anon if there's enough demand for it since it takes time to do research, put together screenshots like this, make the video, edit as needed, etc.

As for my opinion on Gen, now that is something I didn't really elaborate on but it can be implied by more recent posts of mine, I don't exactly hold her on a pedestal. Before I elaborate on my opinions of Gen, I wanted to take a chance to address something I recently saw. Namely, a post someone sent me where it seems an Anon was talking about my Hooters post and where the answer talked about how normal that is going to places like that and how this is crucifying him or perhaps holding him to impossible standards. Now come on, I am no Jared hater and in fact overall like him a lot. No one escapes my observations for better or for worse, Jared and Gen included. I do however just about always defend my friends and family, even if I end up telling them they are wrong in private. I never embarrass my friends or family on purpose and wouldn't do this my partner if I had one unlike Gen ha ha.

Because of the fact I am a personality theories nerd, if anyone is familiar with the MBTI I'm big time ENTP. Of course, labels don't describe everything and we are more than just certain things but I am mentioning this because I question EVERYTHING and EVERYONE, it's what I do. Some people just need to get over this.... anyways onto the real topic, just wanted to share that fun fact about myself and a tidbit of my general personality with you all.

I decided to take this opportunity to share screenshots from a Reddit thread on others' opinions on men who frequently go to places like Hooters, Tilted Kilt, Coyote Ugly, and then the other ones mentioned in the screenshots below. I will say especially this comment in my opinion, 'cause it is extremely relevant for why I question this whole Hooters frequenting of Jared's in my book (and notably without Gen being there for the more recent times in recent years): "Depends on context. Once in a while for a birthday party or guy’s night is fine. Routinely/regularly on his own? That’s weird." I like people getting multiple perspectives thrown into one, 'cause I can. That's just how I roll, kids! But hey, if you want to see some other sites that talk about this, you can also check out this Quora question, this Askmen thread (where of course a lot of the guys who answered said it's merely a woman being insecure), another Reddit thread where her husband keeps lying about going to places like this, this girlsaskguys thread, you guys get the idea at this point, don't cha?!

And I am pretty sure this is exactly what all these "crazy, insecure women" are thinking these Hooters waitresses and such are thinking, summarized in a catchy song "Don't Cha" by the Pussycat Dolls. 🎶I'd probably be just as crazy about you if you were my own man🎶

Nah but man for real, I found it funny how the same day Coyote Ugly photos came out, Gen's hair stylist or something posted this. Was this to validate herself or just her position in her cushy lifestyle. Oops, I meant as Jared's loving wife and mother of 3 children... or did I? Here I answered someone earlier today about Jared going from wanting to retire to being a producer and then ended up being both the lead character and the Executive Producer on his Show "Walker". I provided plenty of direct quotes to show what is being officially said about why he changed his mind on staying in acting. Note that I said officially there being the keyword in the last sentence. My real opinion? I think that Jared started to realize that because he spent so much time away from home that he in a way feels like an outsider, an issue that might've been exasperated by the COVID lockdowns. I can't for the life of me find where that interview was originally from, so if someone wants to chime in I'll gladly give credit :D

Now I'm going to bring up a couple of quotes directly from this video that was from their Walker Interview on "The Talk" from April 2021 after the midseason finale of Walker. Again coming straight out of Jared and Gen's mouths.

9:48 What has it been like to to get to work together and live together again? Jared: "Uhh it's been pretty magical I think I think I'll kind of echo something that Gen said earlier which is it's really nice you know. I think as it happens often times mothers will umm put their passions and their talents aside uh when having kids. And annoying so below, 10:12 Um more often than not it's because the fathers are useless. I know I can say that as far as I go, and so she kind of stepped aside from acting for about nine years to make sure that our kids didn't perish so thank god but now seeing her work again in her elements. You know she had gone to school and acted she had her own TV show and then we had met on the TV, she had done movies and this and that and so to be able to show her off you know during COVID times. Con't. 10:55 During COVID times my kids can't come to set because we're all tested regularly. You have to be part of a certain uh grouping tha tyou can only talk with people that you work with, we're all wearing masks and we're all distancesd and so I can't bring friends or family or my kids to set but I can have my wife there because she's on show as well. 11:03 to 11:12: It's date day. So there have been I'll admit there have been a few times where we've been on set and it'll be like 5pm and we're both wrapped. We're like well if we wait a couple hours then the kids will be asleep by the time we get home. Gen starts laughing and says (I think) don't admit that. 11:16 to 11:26: They won't see it, they won't know until a couple more years. (Gen briefly says "catch dinner") Yeah we're gonna be like pretending, let's pretend we're still filming. Uh, let's tell the babysitter we're still filming and let's go get some sushi or something" 11:36 onward And of course, Gen takes a moment to talk about her pet project TOWWN here. Is this about the show Walker or is this about the Jared and Gen show?

Well Jared she certainly made her stance clear in this interview with Dave Hollis (partial transcript included in my post here) how she really felt about you coming home to live with her. Just saying...

"This is the first time I lived with my husband. I know that sounds really crazy but my husband had been filming a TV show for 15 years in Vancouver so when all of this started you know he came down here. He had 2 episodes left and then that was the completion of the series. Personally, it meant that I had to live with him and deal with coparenting which was really stressful like the thought of it. And to make that work, and it was crazy because we were always in this tight bubble with just us and our kids and it really was simplifying. It was you know like the layers are gone. The interference is gone, drama is kinda out the window in a way, and we got to really simplify basic needs. It's so weird how much unlayering we had to do and that's what I'm finding through all of this is a lot of unlayering to get to the core". "I was just talking to someone about this that my favorite relationship with him is a work relationship. Sometimes it's hard to be married to him because he's like, Jared is so interesting because he's so analytical. I mean my husband, I'm going to toot his horn because he's literally one of the smartest human beings I've ever met in my life and it's annoying because he will correct you on words you think he didn't even know. I have a book of SAT words just because I'm like I am going to get him. And so I'll just casually talk about something and use a crazy word in a sentence and he'll be like well you pronounced it incorrectly. It's so frustrating. Also in our marriage he's very giving and emotional and supportive. He's supportive in everything that I've done and I feel really lucky and grateful. I think even more so when it comes to work he is your biggest cheerleader and it's going to be a lot of time together. But funny enough, I think we'll be better at work than sometimes we are at home. Because I'm like, this is how the kids are, this is how I like them, this is the order that I like things in. And it's hard for me to let go I think, at home. but at work, it's just a really nice exchange and I feel really lucky, and he'll sit there too. If he's not working, he'll take it, pull up a chair and talk on the phone and watch at me and I can hear him bragging about me and whether he's doing it for my benefit I don't know but it makes me feel good and I feel really lucky that he does stuff like that."

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A post shared by Genevieve Padalecki (@genpadalecki)

Cute how they bring the kids to the set of Walker at times like they did in the promos last week, ain't it? However, being the questioner I am I wondered after a friend brought up a great point: "why didn't she and Jared celebrate watching the Total Solar Eclipse together on April 8, 2024, which was yesterday?" Not like COVID is preventing Gen from bringing the kids on the set CLEARLY. AND why was she NOT taking this amazing chance to advertise the cool Walker Eclipse glasses (therefore advertising HER and HER HUSBAND'S show) but instead chose to advertise yet another company in her IG story? Another affiliate partnership that's probably gonna rake in less dollars than you know, her husband's show (I meant the "family project")? Dunno you all decide...

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A post shared by Jared Padalecki (@jaredpadalecki)

I mean also funny how in the post below she was seen wearing one of these "less cool" types of Eclipse glasses during the 2017 Solar eclipse, which I'm saying 'cause they're not as snazzy or sunglasses like. So, not buying the whole "it's because it's more fashionable" type of logic or "she can do whatever she wants". Sure she can but she's in the public eye so her actions and such are free game to criticism. Bite me!

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A post shared by Nay🌻 (@angel_gen_)

Point is, Gen is just a walking advertisement. She is fake, she's clearly all about her cushy lifestyle she didn't truly earn (looking at you, black magic!), and frankly I'm pleased that she's got a long ass sentence in "hell" ahead of her (which is funnily enough way longer than Danneel's actually). Also, is it just me or is there something weird about this page excerpt she selected from the book and then comparing it to the attire she chose for the Mom2Summit event this weekend in Nashville, TN? As if the following book excerpt isn't somehow telling about how she REALLY feels without actually saying how she feels...

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A post shared by Charlie Capen (@charliecapen)

Notice the color of her pants in that post Charlie made has her in turquoise pants. And then go read the above. It starts with: "When we're married, I want us to work together. We'll be a team, and I won't leave you out of matters the way my dad did my mom. She wishes Harv hadn't told her all of this. If he was only using her to prop up his family name, it would be easier to leave him. But he wants a true partnership, one where he would welcome her opinions and thoughts." Another part says towards the end of the page "She pictures Ko Lipe from her poster, the inviting turquoise waves. Her dress flutters around her legs as she heaves one leg over the railing, then the other. On her tiptoes, she surveys the water below her. It's no Thai island but it'll do. She jumps." Also note where she underlined: "Too many expectations. Too many people in her ear saying they're not asking for too much. She gives and gives but still it's not enough."

Not sure how much she's giving here because she's been handed everything on a silver platter and fed by a silver spoon her entire life but what do I know? Turns out she even walked away during this summit towards the end to "take a phone call". From who, your husband who once said was ignoring you in a video and said "come on pick up" in? Feeling a bit petty right now XD

My bottomline view of Gen is, she tries to portray herself as this homestead type of crunchy Earth hippy mom but then when you look at her closely enough she is a much bigger liar than Danneel is and is much more fake. She is not this great, super supportive wife that Jared for some dumb ass reason keeps trying to make her out to be. For example, I find it funny how just last week she was all about promoting Walker, even including filming Jared with Odette and Shep. Cute right? Until I realized that they didn't even share the moment of the Total Eclipse yesterday, let alone Gen advertised yet another affiliate product instead of her own husband's show. I honestly don't believe the whole oh we can't bring the kids on set rule during COVID. If y'all are the bosses (oh sorry, there's really only 1 and that's Jared NOT Gen) you can make exceptions. What is the CDC gonna do, arrest you for bringing your kids to work? They could've made them stay stuck to their iPads or something, not that hard to social distance unless they're unruly. But then again being the wittle rebel I can be at times, I just think outside the box a lot. Heck, I brought my kid to work with me to my job during COVID and when he did them online schooling sessions and all that on iPad, ain't it so nice being able to work for family? ♥

[stillness138]

for the character ask game: Vernon Roche

i gotta think about this! thank you

first impression: i actually remember this pretty well because witcher 2 was my first exposure to the franchise. i think i felt pretty much what i was supposed to feel though; "this guy imprisoned me but seems more sensible than the goons he employs". i liked his matter-of-fact but clearly proud and protective attitude towards Ves and his putting the key on the table and walking away like 'surely Geralt will manage'.

impression now: i still like him! surprisingly, cdpr writes original characters with really commendable nuance. of course, if Iorveth is to be believed word for word, Roche is responsible for carrying out hate crimes (he doesn't deny the accusations Iorveth makes, so i think that's just fact), and yet he shows time and time again that he really is more sensible than most. compare him to Rayla - also a special forces leader - and see the difference. Roche lacks the outright bloodthirst or really even the prejudice; it seems to me that he does his job and obeys Foltest without objection because he sees it as doing something worthwhile with his life, considering how he grew up. he and Iorveth contrast and parallel each other in fascinating ways.

favorite thing about him: his relationship towards Ves, because he clearly values her as an employee and as a person. his relative level-headedness. and the unpacked daddy issues that are most definitely there even if he won't talk about it. that part of him is sadly the most relatable to me. i also enjoy his humor, whether intentional or not. "emhyr var emreis, spice merchant" bursting into the elven baths while Triss is trying her hardest to seduce Geralt, fucking comedy gold.

least favorite thing about him: apart from the hate crimes? i think most of my issues that relate to him are metatextual - because the entire political landscape and plotline of witcher 3 sucks ass. maybe he could've held back the cops that beat Geralt though ngl.

favorite line/scene: "And we did. For three days. Then they smashed us into splinters." again, as much as i dislike the politics in witcher 3, this bit stands out to me. maybe also because it's punctuated by a reprise of the second game's main theme, in 3's instrumentation and a much more somber mood. good scene. that and the funny bits. "Some professional you are..."

favorite interaction he has with another character: it should be mainly credited to Letho's absolutely hilarious one-liner, but their little reunion at Kaer Morhen always gets a chuckle out of me. the entire interrogation at the beginning of witcher 2 is up there too.

a character that i wish he would interact with more: in the second game, elves in general. he mostly proves he's not completely shit-headed in context, but it would've been interesting to see him have a conversation with someone like Cedric. third game should've had Iorveth, we all know that.

another character from another fandom that reminds me of him: i know 5 things, but if i had to make a comparison... general Tullius from Skyrim? both are very capable and dedicated servants of a government despite its obvious failures and both show a noticeable sensibility or even calm you perhaps wouldn't expect. both have a badass lady as their right-hand person, too.

a headcanon about him: he hates the smell of cheap alcohol. childhood reminder. i also think he has a notable appreciation for architecture. can't remember if he actually comments on Loc Muinne in any way but somehow it feels like a thing he'd do. and i think it's pretty much canon that his hair color is towards light brown? or have i been living with fanon for far too long. either way, yeah, dirty blonde or warm light brown, super short on the sides.

a song that reminds of him: Shadowplay by Joy Division, in a way. first verse about beginning to serve Foltest, second verse about Foltest's and Temeria's fall. "but i could only stare in disbelief as the crowds all left" versus "and we did, for three days, then they smashed us into splinters".

an unpopular opinion about him: i famously dislike shipping him with Iorveth and i'm actually yet to see a good Roche ship. but the real hot take is that he doesn't need one. did i just say aroace Vernon Roche? maybe.

favorite picture: i'm sorry, but it's gotta be this one. on a more serious note, i always liked this piece of fanart a lot too. he gets to be cool.

[shadamyheadcanons]

hi!! so i’ve watched all of shadow and amy’s canon in game interactions (which are very cute, he honestly treats her so much differently than the others ?? like he’s def in love) and, it made me wonder, is there any interactions in the comics between the two that are like, cute?? i dunno LOL. i just crave more semi-canon shadamy. whenever i try to search it just shows me fan-made comics

I don’t know the comics super well, but I do sometimes track down an issue or two if I know Shadow and Amy are in it. Archie has this cool spin-off series called Sonic Universe that tells the stories that go on in the background that Sonic isn’t there for. I love it because it lets other characters--Amy, Shadow, Blaze, Knuckles, you name it--shine. I love Sonic himself, but there are certain dynamics you just can’t see when he’s around, particularly with Amy because he draws so much of her attention. When Sonic’s not around, though, Amy immediately makes a beeline for Shadow. She consistently seeks him out just as she does in the games, and that sticks out to me.

The one I always recommend first is the Treasure Team Tango arc.

It’s Sonic Universe issues 21-24. It’s the shippiest one I’ve found and features Amy playing the role of Shadow’s moral compass just as she did in SA2. In it, Amy leads a pseudo Team Rose--Blaze, Cream, and herself--in search of a Sol Emerald. Team Dark is in pursuit of it, too, and it’s up to Amy to make Shadow see the light and let Blaze have the Emerald her world so desperately needs. Amy and Shadow are at their peak. Blaze is awesome and perfectly in character. Cream and Cheese are adorable as always. Omega is at his funniest for a few reasons I won’t spoil. Unfortunately, Rouge isn’t written very well here, but other than that, the characters, plot, humor, and art are all on-point.

It also has Bean.

I like Bean.

To read it, click here.

Another one I’d recommend is the Shattered arc. It runs from issues 87 to 90, also from the Sonic Universe collection. Amy and Knuckles work with Team Dark to find some Master Emerald shards. It’s not as shippy as the other one, but Amy seeks Shadow out once again, and the two of them do get to squeeze in some childish teasing at the beginning.

Cute. How many characters can make Shadow pout like that? They fight well together later on, too.

This story focuses more on the strained relations between Shadow and Knuckles. Rouge acts as a mediator and tries to get them to play nice, and you can easily read it as “I just want my best friend and my boyfriend to get along for, like, ten minutes.”

Well...I read it that way, at least. Don’t know about anyone else. Rouge also makes peace with Amy here. These things are necessary for any future Knuxouge/Shadamy double dates, y’know?

It’s got good platonic interactions between Shadow and Knuckles, who have more in common than they’d like to admit. Omega is hilarious again. Rouge is a good friend this time around, which is exactly the kind of Rouge I like to see. The end has a really heartwarming conversation between Knuckles and Amy, too.

Not much Shadamy, but still worth a read. Here’s the link.

That’s all I know about for Archie.

IDW has one or two interactions, but Sega’s put such strict mandates on Shadow’s portrayal that Ian Flynn doesn’t like writing him in IDW, so he doesn’t include Shadow often. It’s a damn shame, too, because IDW Amy is great. Love her.

I’m still only 8 issues in. I do know of a couple panels where they show up together later, though I don’t know the context. First off, she almost runs him over at the start of issue #33:

To an outsider, Rouge seems like she’s being sarcastic, but...no. This really IS nice for IDW Shadow, especially considering Amy almost ran him over. He’d snap at most people for that. Notice how he’s civil to Amy but doesn’t even acknowledge Rouge, who’s supposed to be his...*checks notes*...best friend. And she doesn’t seem surprised. Yeah, we’ve fallen pretty far from Archie Shadow:

(To be clear, I photoshopped Amy in there. She fits pretty well, though, doesn’t she?)

Ian Flynn clearly knows how to write this guy, so I don’t know why Sega won’t let him do his thing. I’m still holding out hope that the third movie will nail Shadow’s character the way the second one did for Knuckles. Maybe then Sega could see the value of a more nuanced Shadow. It could happen, right?

The only other bit I know is this panel from issue #36:

I mean...I’m not quite in the camp of “Shadow is definitely in love with Amy” yet, but...if he’s not jealous, then what is this reaction? ;)

[nicnacsnonsense]

So there’s a post going around about how Izzy and Stede are a case of hatred at first sight, and I love that post, would not disparage that post, but I did notice a small hole in the “at first sight” part of the theory. At the end of their confrontation in episode 2, Stede does try to be polite to Izzy, introducing himself and offering to shake Izzy’s hand. It’s only when Izzy shows up again in episode 3 that Stede starts being bitchy to him. The short and most likely explanation is Izzy’s refusal to shake hands, instead threatening Stede with a “this isn’t over,” put Stede off the man and made him conclude Izzy was just an asshole. Definitely the most likely explanation, buuuuuut *gets out corkboard and string*

Okay, so right off the bat I can’t help but notice that Stede’s initial response to Izzy’s threat seems kind of positive? When he says “good, because I kind of enjoyed it,” it sounds genuinely anticipatory to me. Which makes sense; this confrontation is the exact type of thing that would appeal to Stede’s romanticized view of pirates. I bet he was even excited that he had a nemesis now. But when Izzy shows up again, Stede doesn’t treat him like a nemesis. You have a certain amount of respect for your nemesis, and Stede does not respect Izzy. The original post mentions Stede treating Izzy like he wished he could treat the people who bullied him, and I think that’s exactly it. You know how sometimes a person who is/was bullied will have these imaginary confrontations with their bully where they are the cool, confident one now and their bully is the pathetic one? Stede treats Izzy like he’s having one of those confrontations in real life and Izzy is the pathetic version of his bully.

Which brings the question of what caused this shift. I think a crucial part of it is that in episode 2, Stede knows nothing about what Izzy is like as a person; he only knows that Izzy’s pretty good with a sword and that he bought the hostages off the natives, but presumably does not know anything about the context of how that happened. That latter point is relevant because it seems likely that at the time Stede is assuming Izzy did not know about Stede and his crew’s involvement in taking Officers Hornberry and Wellington hostage and is under the impression that they became prisoners of the natives in similar way to how Stede and Pete did. Now, no one else on Stede’s crew seems to have had any interactions with Izzy that Stede wasn’t present for that would offer him further insight into the man’s personality. Buttons did have the conversation with Izzy that could have revealed to Stede that Izzy was aware that they had taken the hostages first, but that would require Buttons to actually tell Stede about the conversation and in such a way that Stede was able to parse together what actually happened rather than assuming Buttons was discussing real or imagined ghosts.

But you know who did spend some time with Izzy and very likely could know that Izzy knew about Stede and crew when he bought the hostages? Officer Hornberry. We can be fairly confident that Hornberry formed a negative impression of Izzy in even the brief time he spent with him; hilariously, when Stede initially jumps out of the bushes and claims dibs on the hostages you can see Hornberry nodding in agreement in the background, which he quickly turns into a head shake and a glare when Izzy looks back at him. And we know for certain that Stede and Hornberry have a good rapport; we both see it and hear Stede directly call it out in episode 3.

So my crazy theory is that directly after Stede first met Izzy, he was excited to have a nemesis now, bless his dramatic bitch pirate fanboy heart. But then as they were heading back to the ship, Hornberry started telling him about how mean Izzy was. Stede and Hornberry started gossiping about it, and you just know comparisons to Nigel and how awful he was came up. By the end of the conversation Stede had concluded that Izzy was not his super cool nemesis, but a bully and an asshole. But not just any bully and asshole, no Izzy is a bully and an asshole that Stede didn’t have to feel afraid of because he had already stood up to and bested him. And now Stede finally has an outlet to say all the things he ever wanted to say, but was too scared to. Love that for him 💖

[freddieslater]

Ballum + You Belong With Me!

It's free entertainment, really. Or it would be if it was more amusing and less sad to watch. Ben raises his glass and takes a drink, watching the little display at the other end of the bar. By his estimations, Callum has been on the phone with Whitney for five minutes now. It turned sour around the two-minute mark. 

He's not entirely sure why - it's a bit hard to get all of the context when he only has one side of the conversation, but he's pretty sure it's because she didn't like how Callum said something. It's ridiculous and insane, and a bit pathetic, if he's entirely honest. That doesn't stop him from taking some joy in it.

It's kind of hilarious, actually. The way that Callum and Whitney are so obviously wrong for each other. Seriously, even without the whole gay factor (which is kind of a big one, but still), they just don't work. 

She's sweet. So is he. The problem is that they're too alike. Callum needs someone different. Someone a bit rougher than him, and who pushes him, makes him feel things and question things (more than just his sexuality). Ben swallows thickly. It's bitter. And ironic. 

Perfectly timed, Callum looks right over at him. Ben freezes, lips parted with his glass resting against the bottom one. He doesn't look away. Neither does Callum, who seems to go still as well. The rest of the Vic and its noisy chatter might as well be white noise. For a moment, there's just them, and he thinks that Callum finally sees it too. 

He says something into his phone, sighs, and puts it away. His eyes dart back over in his direction. When Mick asks if he wants a drink, he waves him off and says something about needing to go. Ben watches him all the way to the doors and waits for him to disappear before downing his glass and following him.

He catches up with him easily. When he falls into step with him, Callum sighs again but doesn't tell him to piss off, so that's something. He decides to play along and stays quiet as they walk down the street, choosing instead to notice the worn-out patch on his jeans. It's endearing. 

'What's so funny?' Callum asks, and Ben lifts his head, startled. 'You're smiling.'

'Wasn't,' Ben says, quickly straightening his face out. He shakes his head to really drive it home. 'I wouldn't dare do such a thing. You might think I'm flirting with you and go all weak in the knees for me, and we can't have that.'

Callum rolls his eyes upwards. But there's a smile at the edge of his mouth and it ripples out into a laugh. Ben stares at him in awe; he's never heard him laugh, not properly. It's a genuine, albeit weary, laugh and it's... nice. It's nice. 

Raking his hands over his face, Callum comes to a stop and drops onto the bench. Ben watches him, unsure of what's happening or what to do as Callum stays buried in his hands. Finally, he reemerges, breathing out another laugh. 

'What's so funny?' Ben echoes back at him, only making Callum buckle more. 

He finally manages to answer, looking up at him. 'I have no clue.'

Ben wrinkles his brow and chuckles uncertainly, and he sits beside Callum. They don't speak. Callum hangs his head and glances up at him. It's easy to simply let the silence sit between them for a while. This is it. The way it's meant to be. It's a striking realization, one that hits him where he really feels, knocking the wind out of him. Callum inhales sharply at the same moment and looks away. Ben does, too. Maybe one day. Hopefully soon.