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changisworld · 5 months

Text

“just try it”

fuckboy!hyunjin x reader

Word count;7,023

Summary: you’re known as quite a timid & closed off person in your college class, the one who studies 24/7 & doesn’t have much interest/ confidence in order to enjoy the usual college life, including having sex. You get partnered up for a project with the known fuckboy of the campus, hyunjin.

MDNI, 18+ only, smut warnings under the cut

©ANY translation, copy & paste, posting of my work is strictly forbidden for ANY posts/ writing i post.

main masterlist here

part 2 here

SMUT WARNINGS: Virginity loss (f rec), slight coercion, kinda manipulative hyune, fingering(f rec). oral (both rec), piv, multiple orgasms, slight needy hyune, slight body worship, nipple sucking, light marking(scratching, hickey), corruption???, mention of blood( It's extremely brief) kinda angsty ending??

"Hyunjin, for the presentation you can go with... y/n!" your lecturer says after scanning the room & you freeze as she says this, making you want the ground to swallow you on the spot. You know Hyunjin & you haven't got a good opinion on him whatsoever.

You give a faint, displeased smile to your teacher before she moves onto sort out other groups for the project & a minute later, the chair beside you is moved & your new partner is now sitting next to you.

"heya, glad to be your partner, don't worry, I'll actually pull my weight sweetie so you won't be doing it on your own." he says with a faint smile, resting his head on his hand as he looks at you.

You stare at him as he says this, honestly in disbelief. You know he is just trying to piss you off as he has asked you to do an essay for him, leaving you with all his notes before running off, not allowing you to even say no. "I don't want you to help me, you'll make us fail. I'll just do it." you say, venom in your voice & hyunjin 'tuts' at this.

"Cmonnn y/n, don't be silly, i'd love to help! You can come to my place at the end of today & we can start." he says as he rips the corner of the piece of paper you were writing on & writing his address on it before sliding it to you & then standing up & resting his hands on the back of your chair as he leans down to you. "See ya later."

He leaves the classroom as the bell goes & you groan, scrunching up the paper he scribbled on & shoving it into your jacket pocket before also leaving.

⭑･ﾟﾟ･*:༅｡.｡༅:*ﾟ:*:✼✿　　✿✼:*ﾟ:༅｡.｡༅:*･ﾟﾟ･⭑

You spend your lunchtime in the library, starting a few rough drafts so you can get a better idea of what you want to say as you present, taking the extra couple of minutes to write Hyunjins parts too. You have your headphones on & you're quite honestly in your own little bubble but as you look u from the computer to open your drink, you notice the same annoying guy from earlier, sitting across from you, looking at his phone, not paying you any mind.

"Can I help you?" you question, staring at him with an annoyed lookon your face. "Actually, you can. Stop working without me, I want to help." he responds back, not looking up from his phone as he texts someone. You scoff & roll your eyes as you swivel around in your spinny chair, looking right at him.

"I don't feel like failing because you do jack shit. Just go n i'll do it myself, go admire yourself in the mirror or something & leave me alone." you respond again before turning back to your computer but a second later your chair is being pulled by him so you're facing him again, his phone now on the desk.

"Stop being so weird y/n, I want to pass as much as you do so stop being so stingy. Move, I wanna see what you've wrote." he flashes you a closed mouth smile before lightly pushing your chair, allowing him to now have space for him to also sit. You groan before standing up. "Just take my seat Hyunjin, I'm leaving." You push your seat towards him & begin to leave but you feel him swing his arm out & hook around your waist before pulling you.. onto his lap.

"You're so hard to please, you like this with everyone n everything hm?" he questions as he begins reading what you've written down, grabbing the keyboard & beginning to tweak a few things.

You hate to admit it & glad there are no mirrors anywhere so you don't have to allow yourself to see how much you're blushing. You can't think of anything to say so you just sigh as you watch him type, his arm still around your lower half, him paying no mind to it as he pulls his airpods out & handing you one as he uses the other as he puts a random playlist of his on, your own headphones around your shoulders.

You both stay like this, you being too shy to move & he just simply not caring, he asks for your opinion on certain parts as he types out your opinions.

A minute or so later, you both hear footsteps entering the library but you both don't pay attention, up until the footsteps stop right in front of you, the footsteps belonging to another girl in your class, Lisa. You give her a small smile, trying to be polite despite not really being friends but she ignores you as she pulls Hyunjins airpod out & he flips his head around before looking up at her.

"Ah, hiya Lisa, you alright?" he asks as he now realises the perfume you're wearing, which he likes. "Yup. Wha'cha doing? I thought we were going for lunch together at that new cafe I saw, y/n keeping you prisoner? You're more than capable to do this without Hyunjin today, right? Can you stand up n Jinnie cmon." Lisa replies, trying to sound as if she is joking around but it's obvious she's pissed.

Her words make you remember that you're still sitting on Hyunjins lap & you instantly shoot up but his arm stops you, forcing you back onto him. "Ahh Lisa totally forgot, y/n is helping me get that A so i'm gonna stay, go with Chan or something, I'm busy." he responds, turning the chair you're both sitting on so you're both now facing the computer as he begins typing again.

Lisa scoffs as she has her eyes burning into the back of your head before she slams his airpod back down on the desk & walking out, her paying no mind to the stares from annoyed students she is receiving. "Bitch almost broke my airpod into damn pieces." he murmurs as he reaches out & takes it back & puts it in his ear, not mentioning anything else, which makes you curious.

"Why is she so upset? You can go with her Hyunjin I can really do this on my own." you question, reaching forward to pull your notepad towards you, swatting his hands off the keyboard as you start copying what you've wrote on paper, onto the document. "She's pissed because me n her have been fucking n she can't handle me talking to any other pretty girl. Me n her are nothing so don't stress pretty, I'm available." he jokes as he leans back to let you type & you scoff.

"How can you be fucking her yet you claim to be nothing with her? You're playing with her feelings, it's sad." you respond, annoyance in your tone & Hyunjin just sighs. "I've got a big dick n I like to use it. You'd fuck her too if you had a dick, she's good at sucking it, believe me. She said she wouldn't catch feelings but here we are. I'm tryna pawn her off to Seungmin or Chan but she doesn't take the hint." he says, nonchalantly as his fingers fiddle with the bottom of your shirt, simply twiddling it in between his fingers.

"Why you interested anyway, It's casual sex. Don't you relate? I know you don't party or anything since i woulda seen your pretty face from anywhere but don't you ever hook up with anyone?" He questions, leaning forward as he rests his chin on your shoulder, not failing to miss how you tense up as he does so. You don't respond to him, which give him his answer.

"Ohhh, you a virgin or something? How does someone who looks like you not get around?" he teases, wiggling from side to side in the chair, making you wiggle on him as you huff. "Shut up Hyunjin, oh my god. I just.. have better things to do? I have better things to focus on." you murmur back, cheeks going red again but this time out of embarrassment. He chuckles before letting the subject go, not wanting to pry too much.

You type for a minute or so more as he helps you reword it, suggesting some ideas which actually aren't stupid. This goes on for a few minutes until you hit a stump & both can't agree on what to do. "Just come to mines later, mkay? I know you've kept the paper, Sorry to be the one to break the bad news but I've got to go see someone, so you're gonna need to get off my lap." he says, patting your leg & you shoot up, remembering where you both are & being reminded again you are siting on thee Hyunjins lap.

He packs his stuff up before ruffling his hair up & then walks past you, taking his airpod out of your ear & also your headphones off your shoulders at the same time. You turn around to protest but he speaks before you can get any words out. "I'll take these with me so you have to come later, unless you wanna buy another pair of course, see ya later pretty." he skips away, your teeth clenched & eyebrows frowned as you watch him.

⭑･ﾟﾟ･*:༅｡.｡༅:*ﾟ:*:✼✿　　✿✼:*ﾟ:༅｡.｡༅:*･ﾟﾟ･⭑

You reach his apartment later that night after going home to get dressed, now wearing sweatpants & a plain grey tee & you stand at the front door for a minute, trying to talk yourself into knocking on the door but also to try calm your nerves. 'why am I so fucking nervous?' you keep asking yourself. Before you can act on anything however, you feel a tap on your back & it's obviously hyunjin, staring back at you, before moving forward to unlock his door, as he does this you realise the faint smell of a sweet smelling perfume, which makes you roll your eyes.

"You coming in then?" he questions as he kicks off his own shoes, arm still holding the door open for you & you sigh before stepping in, also taking off your shoes.

You follow Hyunjin into his bedroom out of all places as he takes your bag off your back & throws it onto his bed, you take a seat on his desk chair, spinning from side to side as you sit on top of your hands. "Why can't we study in your kitchen hmm? or livingroom?" you question & he flops onto his bed before digging through your bag to grab your books. "My wifi connection is shit everywhere except for my bedroom & bathroom for some reason so unless you wanna spend even longer with me than you want, not that I'd mind, by the way, we gotta do it here." he says, not bothering to look up at you as he grabs a few highlighters & pens from your pencil case, taking the extra few seconds to have a quick dig through the rest of your bag before putting it on the floor.

You scoff as you stand up off the chair & settle down on his bed beside him after realising it will be almost impossible for you to both sit at his desk due to the size of it & the random clutter all over it.

You both begin figuring out what the hell you both need to include for your exam, Hyunjin obviously still randomly trying to flirt with you but you just ignore it. You both actually start making progress, both of you lying on your stomachs across from one another as the mixture of scrap paper, books & laptop is in between the both of you as you both balance yourselves on your elbows.

Every time you both have a quick discussion, however, you can't help but notice how much his eyes wander to the opening of your shirt, showing the top part of your chest, you try to ignore it but you can't help but get a bit flustered by it, which he realises so he doesn't have the shame to stop. "Can you stop trying to stare at my tits? You aren't even being discreet." you scoff, trying to sound stern but your voice pitch raises at the end regardless.

"Can't help it. You're hot n if it's right in front of me, you can't blame me, silly." he quickly responds, nibbling on the end of your pen. "You're such a man slut, you have another girls perfume on you yet you can't contain yourself around someone else not even two hours later, you gross me out." you snap back, reaching out to snatch the now slightly chewed pen from between his pretty lips & wiping it on him before dropping it on the bed.

"Only have the perfume smell because Lisa knew I was gonna be with you later, you jealous or something y/nnnn?" he snarks, reaching out to boop your nose, watching as the tip of your ears go bright red. "Jealous? Don't make me laugh, Hyunjin. I don't care what you n her have going on, believe me." You break eye contact with him, getting flustered from the conversation happening. "Cmonnn, y/n, if you wanna fuck, just say that." he half jokes, picking up the pen again before fiddling it in his hand.

You laugh at his words, honestly not even surprised at what he is saying. "You're so cocky, god. I'd genuinely, rather die." you spit, eyebrows frowned, which makes him hum. "So, you're telling me, If i was to kiss you, you'd actually push me off you?" he queries, pushing the paper & books to the side, nothing separating the two of you anymore.

You open your mouth to mostly yell at him for even saying something so dumb but you don't get any words out as he puts his hand behind your head & leans forward before connecting his lips against yours. You freeze under the touch, not even really knowing what to do since you've never actually kissed anyone either, but you can't help but take notice of how soft his lips are & how they move in a perfect rhythm.

He breaks his lips off yours a few seconds later, but doesn't leave your space, your lips centimetres apart. He again realises how much he is blushing & you hate how composed he looks. "Y/n." he says, in a lower voice. "mhmm?" you instantly reply, your heart racing. "Was that your first kiss?" he questions, the hand behind your head now playing with your hair.

You embarrassingly nod your head & he just smiles. "Well, since we are here, we can redo it, if you want. No pressure." he responds, his voice now sounding more soft. You mentally contemplate for a split second before nodding. "just follow my lead alright, it's easy." he says before leaning back in & kissing you again.

You move your lips against his, remembering to relax your lips so it feels easier & better for Hyunjin. You subconsciously lift your hand to rest it against his cheek but as you do this, he leans further forward & pushes into you with his bodyweight, making it so you are now laying on your back & you can't help but feel your underwear dampen, which gives you even more butterflies.

He moves the hand that was resting on the back of your head & rests it on your cheek instead, caressing it with his thumb as his other hand now rests on your lower stomach before his fingers begin playing with the hem of your shirt & you move your own hand & rest it on top of his that is playing with your shirt.

He keeps the pace of the kiss slow, keeping it enjoyable for the both of you but he can almost hear your heartbeat going at a million miles per hour as he teases you by biting your bottom lip, which makes you let out a small whimper which instantly sends blood to his cock.

You somehow forget to breathe & as he breaks the kiss for the second time, you're breathing a lot heavier as your cheeks are on fire due to how much you're blushing.

"There's no way that was your first kiss, you're so good at it." he remarks, biting his own bottom lip, which you can't help but find extremely hot. His fingers now dig themselves under your shirt, his finger now lightly scratching & caressing the skin of your stomach, making your back arch slightly.

"It was my first time.. I swear." you say back, your voice sounding more blown out & airy than you wanted. "Well, if you want, we can go further. I've already been your first in one thing & I'd be able to actually show you how to feel good.. for your future partners, of course." he says, his voice sounding low again, his fingers not stopping their actions as he still caresses your skin.

"I- that's a huge thing Hyunjin, I want my first time to be with someone who I really care about." you basically whisper back, your nerves making you want to almost vomit, he pouts at your response. "heyyy, I can show you absolutely everything you'll ever need, I'd look after you so well, make you feel amazing, if you'll let me. I know you care for me even a little bit since you've been blushing every time we have spoken today. Not to mention, I've never had a bad review." he responds, elongating the last word to try get his point across.

As he says this, he leans further down & rubs his nose against yours while giving a faint smile, before leaning down & nuzzling his face into your neck , inhaling your sweet vanilla perfume before nibbling on your neck. "I promise. pleaseee.?" he whispers in your ear, his fingers now crawling further up your frame, resting just beneath your tits, which makes your breath hitch. You think for a second, your hand reaching up to caress his long soft hair as you nod your head before mumbling an 'okay' & you can feel him smile against your neck.

He sets himself back up on his elbows, giving you a warm look before leaning back, kissing you again as his fingers now reach up & cup your right tit, to his surprise you're not wearing a bra, which makes him hum. "No bra? Did you expect this, y/n?" he asks, smirk not leaving his face as he starts to brush his fingers over your nipple, making you squirm beneath him. "They're just uncomfortable." you reply, making him chuckle before kissing you again.

He wraps two fingers around your nipple before twiddling it between them, tugging it lightly every once in a while, liking the reactions you give him as he does so, letting small noises escape your lips & get swallowed by him.

This continues for a minute or so before he moves his lips from yours & moves to your jawline, slowly littering kisses down it before moving down to your neck as he removes his hand from your tit to lift your shirt up but you stop him as you sit up & take your shirt completely off, surprising yourself with the random outburst of confidence.

His eyes light up at the sight, your tits being some of, if not the best pair he has ever saw. He smirks at your face, you giving him a faint smile, your eyes filled with lust as you are convinced your panties are now soaked more than they already are. "so pretty, can I taste them?" he asks as he lays down & pulls you so you're now straddling him, your ass now being able to feel his thick hard on.

You nod & he wastes no time at all before pushing on your back, your tits now right above his face before he looks up at you, smiling before he latches his pretty plump lips on your nipple as his fingers begin playing with the other one again & you can't control the yelp you let out at the feeling. You throw your head back as your fingers weave their way through his hair as you lightly tug on it, making him release a few low groans as he continues suckling, spit leaving his lips & wetting your boobs.

You can't help but begin grinding against him, the sucking noises & your light whimpers filling the room. He switches to the opposite nipple & at the same time, his hand comes to rest on your ass, caressing it & squeezing the flesh, making you arch your back, wanting more.

"Hyune- more, please." you say, swallowing your pride & asking the man beneath you to give you what you now want. He unlatches himself & you look down at him, his lips & chin shiny with his own spit as he helps you grind against him. "Well what is it you want y/n hmm? You're gonna need to tell me if you want anything since I don't know what you can handle, silly." he replies, smirking at you as he wriggles his fingers into the waistband of your sweatpants as he now grinds into you too.

"I- fingers or something, please?" you whine, leaning forward to hide your face in the side of his neck, hiding the embarrassment on your face. Despite you not being able to see it, he is smirking as he helps move you so you are laying on your back again & your legs automatically part, your feet planted on the bed as he settles between them, sitting on his legs as he takes his hoodie off, revealing his gorgeous body which you can't take your eyes off of.

"Just giving you a bigger view with a view." he remarks which makes you snap out of it, chuckling to himself as he leans forward to kiss your forehead, making your heart flutter.

He sits back again before putting his hands on your knees, caressing them with his thumbs as he is between your legs. "Can I take these off? They're cute n all but I'm sure your bare legs look a whole lot better." he says as he is looking into your blown out pupils without his own, now fiddling with the drawstrings of your joggers.

"Please." you reply & he doesn't waste any time before helping take them off, you raise your hips for him to make it easier, now leaving you in just your basic, white cotton underwear which makes you hide your face in your arms, shy, but he is quick to swat them away.

"Don't hide your pretty face, there's nothing to be embarrassed of. You're so innocent, my y/nnie." you don't fail to miss the 'my' part & you clench around nothing, letting out a small huff as he lays himself down on your stomach. You set yourself up on your elbows as you look down at him, a bit confused as he admires your clothed core, a small wet patch seeping through the cotton.

He takes a finger & touches your wet patch before taking it to his lips & tasting it, letting out a hum noise as he smiles, not even looking at you as he then peels your panties off your skin too, now leaving you completely bare for him, making you squirm.

He plants some kisses on the inside of your thighs as his finger trails up & down your slit, spreading your wetness around your entire core, making you raise your hips off the bed due to the unfamiliar stimulation but he is quick to push you back down.

"I'm gonna give myself a better taste, alright? Keep your hips down or I'll stop. If you seriously want me to stop or slow down, just say the word yellow, okay?" he asks, fingers stopping their movement. "O-okay, can you just go slow? I don't really know what to expect." you reply, giving him a small, nervous smile, which he nods. "Of course, I was planning on it anyway beautiful, Just lay back f'me." You do as he says & lay back & gasp a second later as you feel the kisses have now moved from just your thighs, a kiss now being placed right on your clit.

He kisses from the top to the bottom of your pussy, listening for your reaction & once he realises it's a good reaction, he begins kitten licking your clit, his index finger still feeling around the outside of your hole, adding extra stimulation. He lets out a low groan & licks the entirety of your core in one motion, making you whine & you try to close your legs on accident but he's quicker & wraps your thighs around his arms, holding them open. "Taste so good, fuck." he murmurs to himself more than to you as he begins speeding up his motions slightly, flicking his tongue back & forth before taking your clit into his mouth, suckling on it, making sure to use plenty of spit, the noises of his lips & the wetness echoing throughout the room, almost as loud as the moans you're now making.

You try your best to not squirm too much but you can't help it & you are moving as much as Hyunjin is allowing you to which isnt much by the way, the sensation being completely new to you in the best way possible. You let out an even louder whine as he uses his teeth to lightly graze against your bud, throwing you towards a high, feeling much stronger than when you brought yourself to orgasms.

Hyunjin takes this opportunity to now slide a finger inside your tight hole which you clench around immediately, making him groan again. He begins to slowly finger you while feeling around for your G-spot which only takes him a few seconds due to his long fingers & he begins rubbing his finger up & down it, making your eyes roll to the back of your head as your legs begin to tremble.

"Hyunj- I'm gonna cum, d-dont't stop." you yelp, fisting his clean, grey bedsheets until your knuckles are turning white & who is Hyunjin to deny you? He continues at the exact same pace with his finger but decides to add a second one, stretching you out that bit extra as he continues to suck on your clit, using his tongue to massage it at the same time.

Your orgasm washes over you, it being the most intense thing you've ever felt. Your fingers latch onto his hair & pull on it, pulling a groan out of him as he lets you ride out the first orgasm of the night, his arms having to work harder to actually keep your legs open.

He unlatches himself & slowly pulls his fingers out of you when you've came down from your high, panting heavily as a thin sheen of sweat now coats your face. He sits back up on his legs, caressing the inside of your legs for a moment before crawling up your frame & tapping his now coated fingers on your lips & you understand instantly, opening your lips & he pushes his fingers into your mouth, resting on your tongue as you suck your own juices off them, his eyes not leaving yours for even a second.

He releases his fingers from behind your lips before leaning in & kissing you again, this time worming his tongue past your lips, allowing you to taste yourself even more, making you hum, not expecting to be so turned on by this.

You slither your hand down his pretty chest & even prettier abs before fiddling with the hem of his pants, looking up at him with glossy eyes. "Just gave you heaven n you're wanting more? Aren't you full of surprises." he teases, poking his tongue on the inside of his cheek. "I want to, return the favour, well, try to." you reply, fingers moving down to balm the huge tent in his pants, making him jerk his hips forward on instinct.

"Ahhh, you want to suck my cock, jagi? Aren't you too sweet. I'll guide you. Don't be intimidated though." He says before standing up to kick his pants off & taking his underwear off with it too & you now know what he meant by 'don't be intimidated' because he is huge. He is around 7 inches & it slightly curves upward & his balls pretty & full, making your eyes gape open in amazement but also nerves, he laughs at your reaction.

He sits back down on the bed & you take it upon yourself to move & settle down on the floor in front of him, sitting back on your knees as he opens his leg enough so you can settle between them.

"Just take it at the base with a grip that isn't too strong & jerk up & down at a slower pace & then work your way up, you can kinda twist your wrist in a way too. The tip is the most sensitive so make sure to focus on that mkay? Just do what feels right, I like a tiny bit of pain so don't stress if you graze it." he tells you, his hair sticking to his forehead as he looks down at you.

You nod at his words & begin jerking him off the way he instructed & you're clearly doing a good job as he jerks his hips into your hands, biting his bottom lip as you do so. "Make it wet, it feels better." he groans & you let a glob of spit fly past your lips onto his angry red tip, which makes him wince before you lean further forward & lick the bead of precum off his tip, making him groan.

You look up at his reaction as you begin to suckle on the tip of his cock before moving sown to the shaft & littering kisses & quick suckles on it, before repeating the action. Your hand is now wet with the spit you've dropped onto & jerked all over his cock & you you decide to wing it & you put his entire tip in your mouth, swirling your tongue over it & he throws his head back, trying his best to not jerk into your mouth as you work your way down slowly, taking about a quarter of his cock in your mouth as you keep jerking him off.

"You sure this is y-your first time? too good at th-this." he groans out as he gathers your hair out of your face & pulls it into a makeshift ponytail, groaning at the pleasure you're giving him. You try to take further in your mouth but he's quick to pull your head back up so you're not pushing yourself too much, him deeming it as too much to try deepthroat him on your first time.

Spit keeps escaping your lips & you jerk it into his cock, the sloppy noises turning you on impossibly more. You release his cock from your lips to get your breath back & you blow cold air onto his tip which makes his legs tense up as he lurches forward slightly. "You're made for this y/n, i'm convinced. Lay down on the bed for me pretty." he says in a aired out, raspier voice as he helps you stand up anyway & he lays you on your back.

He quickly walks over to the other side o the bed & opens his drawer before pulling out a condom, ripping it open with his teeth before walking back over to you, your legs already spread open enough for him to slot himself between. He puts the condom on & jerks himself off a few times & then drags his cock over your folds a few times, making you buck your hips.

"I've stretched you with my fingers but it's still gonna be a stretch y/n, please tell me to stop if it's too much, you're a smart girl so i'm sure you know it's gonna hurt. You ready?" he questions, his face more serious looking than before as he looks into your eyes, still dragging his cock, it running over your clit. "I know, Just do it, I'll be fine." you respond, your hands resting on your chest.

He gives you a warm smile before he slowly begins to push inside of you & your breath hitches in your chest, trying to not pay much mind to the pain but a few tears leak past your eyes. Hyunjin pauses his movement when he is half inside you, leaning forward to allow you to hold onto him. He plants a few kisses on your jawline before connecting his lips to yours, kissing you slowly as he pushes the rest of the way in, making you yelp into his mouth, his fingers coming up to wipe away your tears despite him not even being able to see them.

Your hands latch around his back as you keep clenching around him, making him groan into your mouth. Once he can sense you're more relaxed due to not clenching as tight as much anymore, he pushes the rest of the way in before pausing again.

"How are you feeling, beautiful? You alright?" he asks you as he moves the hair out of your face then kissing the tip of your nose. "H-i'm fine, just feels weird." you reply, one of your hands coming down to hold onto his muscly arm, relaxing yourself.

"Okay, I'm glad. I'm gonna move now, alright? The pain will pass, pinky swear." he gives you another peck before he sits back up & holds onto the inside of your legs, keeping you open for him as he slowly retracts himself then pumping himself back in, making you let out a small 'mhmmph' sound. He sets an extremely slow pace, not breaking eye contact with you to make sure you're not going through any extra discomfort.

You begin to let out small moans & whimpers after a few minutes, the pleasure now surpassing the pain. Hyunjin scrunches his eyes together as you clench around him, higher pitched moans leaving his lips. "You c-can go faster. Feels good." you tell him, trying to move your hips to get more. "Thought- you'd never ask. Yo're s-so tight y/n, fuck." he groans as he slowly begins to pick up his speed, the lube provided by the condom plus your wetness making it loud, your skin sticking together as he fully thrusts inside you.

"y-you're so beautiful. So good f'me y/nnie. so pe-perfect."" he whines as he sets a quicker rhythm, throwing his head back, trying to not cum on the spot just from the noises leaving your lips.

He brings a hand down to your clit & begins rubbing circles, matching the pace his cock is doing & your back arches off the bed & you shriek from the overstimulation. "G-gonna cum again, t-too much jinnie." you gasp, eyes rolling to the back of your head as your hand reaches down to try swat his hand away from your clit but he is quick to hold your hand down on your lower stomach, now making you feel his cock moving inside you. "you can take it pretty, Just a little more, o-okay? cum with me." he groans out, not slowing down his pace at all. Your legs keep shaking & your back keeps arching off the bed, unable to even form thoughts, the only words able to leave your mouth being his name.

"c-cuh-cumming hyune." you force out & hyunjin can't help but smirk. He lets go of your hand & leans back down so your chests are connected before nestling himself in your neck before he begins sucking a hickey into your skin, only partially on accident, but you pay no mind.

You begin clenching uncontrollably as you can feel your orgasm bubbling up, your whole body beginning to tingle as his cock is ramming into your G-spot without missing a beat. "Y/nnie p-please don't clench so much, g-gonna cum." You can't stop even if you wanted to though however as your orgasm squirts out of you, spraying directly onto Hyunjins abs, pubic bone, the base of his cock, the bed & a few droplets hitting your lower stomach too, your eyes rolling back into your skull as your fully body shakes, shrieking & gasping uncontrollably.

"Holy shit, y-you're too perfect, squirting on my cock, y/n you'-you're too beautiful, you're n-not real, oh my god." he whines into your neck.Hyunjin basically squeals, his moans are that loud as he bites down on your neck as his own release fills the condom, you being able to feel his cock pulsating inside you.

You both sit in silence for a minute, catching your breaths back, feeling each others chests expanding against the other, his hot breath against your neck as you weave your fingers through his now wet hair.

Once you have both actually came down to earth, he peels himself off of you before peeling the now used condom off his now softening cock & you realise it has a red tint to it despite him trying to hide it from you by throwing it in the bin quickly.

"Did i bleed on your dick Hyunjin? That's so gross I'm so sorry, you could have stopped I wouldn't have cared." you rush out, feeling a deep level of embarrassment but he just tuts in response. "Don't be ridiculous babe, It's normal, doesn't bother me." he replies as he walks over to his drawers, pulling out a pair of boxer shorts & a random tee shirt before handing it to you.

"You can just stay here tonight, I don't really want you tryna get home since it's not stupid to think you're gonna struggle to walk too much, we can go shower soon." He says as he climbs back up his bed, You would protest but you know he is no doubt right. He sits up by his pillows before pulling you into his chest as he kisses the top of your head.

You both stay like this for a while before you both remember your orgasm is still marinating into his bedsheets, he changes them right after he helps you into the shower before joining you.

⭑･ﾟﾟ･*:༅｡.｡༅:*ﾟ:*:✼✿　　✿✼:*ﾟ:༅｡.｡༅:*･ﾟﾟ･⭑

It's been a week since Hyunjin took your virginity & you have tried your best to tell yourself it meant nothing to him, because it most likely didn't but you have since caught feelings for him, despite trying absolutely everything not to.

You both still met every day but it was mostly just on campus & you completed your project & obviously got an A but he actually helped so it wasn't just all you, which you deeply appreciate.

Ever since the project was finished, however, he has kept his distance. He doesn't sit anywhere near you & spends his time in lectures teasing the other random girls who fawn over him, which makes your heart burn.

You are just day dreaming when two girls in front of you talking catches your attention, & that's when you find out Hyunjin hooked up with one of them, the day after he was literally your first for everything.

You feel tears begin threatening to leave your eyes so you gather your stuff & leave the room, your lecturer not paying any mind & you begin walking towards the bathroom to try freshen yourself up when Hyunjin walks from the opposite direction & he notices the tears & he stops you by moving your chin so you're looking up at him.

"Why the tears, sweetcheeks? Pretty girls shouldn't cry." he remarks, chewing gum as he looks at you, wiping a tear off your cheek with his thumb. "Doesn't matter Hyunjin, stop bunking & go back to class." you say in a monotone voice. "woahhh, you're calling me Hyunjin again? I liked the name Jinnie a lot more, why've I been demoted hmm?" he teases back & you want nothing more than to punch the gum out his mouth.

"You tell me, do you tell all the other girl you fuck to call you Jinnie too? Like the one you fucked the day after you took my virginity?" you snap back, your voice shaking. He raises his eyebrows, honestly in shock from your words. "Babe, you know what I'm like, we aren't anything that I'm aware of so I'm a free man. If you want anything else, you gotta tell me." he replies, his voice sounding more soft as you actually begin to cry, which he hugs you as you do.

"I just thought you just wanted your cherry popped, y/nnie, I'm sorry for thinking so, mkay? We can get lunch together or something n cheer you up, we can speak about it." he offers & you just nod , leaving his arms as you wipe your tears away.

He gives you a smile before he wraps his arm around your shoulder, walking back the way he had just came from. "You can choose the place, but not too expensive since I'll pay as an apology present."

⭑･ﾟﾟ･*:༅｡.｡༅:*ﾟ:*:✼✿　　✿✼:*ﾟ:༅｡.｡༅:*･ﾟﾟ･⭑

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sansaorgana · 5 months

Text

— TAMED

PAIRING — Na-Baron Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x fem!Reader

SUMMARY — You're a cat lover and Feyd-Rautha reminds you of one. You want him and you believe you can tame him.

REQUEST — (1)

AUTHOR’S NOTE — This is not exactly what the request was about but it includes Feyd having to deal with his wife's pet (I chose a cat because I'm a cat person myself). You see, I was a bit tired of my Readers being afraid and scared and I was also tired of the arranged marriage trope, which is one of my favourites, but everyone needs a break, huh? 😅

WARNINGS — harm to animals mentioned, brief mentions of Feyd's traumatic past, Reader being absolutely spoiled

WORD COUNT — 4,230

ENGLISH IS MY SECOND LANGUAGE.

TAMED

“I want him,” you announced as you put your binoculars down and your lips curled into a smirk.

Your parents looked at each other, confused. You were in the stands as the guests invited to watch Na-Baron Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen’s gladiator fight. It was his birthday and his uncle made sure all the leaders of the befriended worlds were watching the display of violence and power. The display that made your parents absolutely terrified but you… You were amazed and aroused. The way young Feyd-Rautha defeated his enemies was like a brutal dance; a raw ritual. He was a feral feline and you were known to be a cat lover.

“Excuse me?” Your father asked.

“I want him. Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen,” you repeated without even looking at him. Your eyes were focused only on the man in the arena who was raising his knife in a gesture of victory.

“These people are insane,” your mother hissed.

“You keep telling me it’s time for me to find a husband. I want him,” you pouted. You were determined – but not desperate.

“I can talk to Baron Harkonnen. But I am sure he would rather marry his nephew and heir to one of the Imperial Princesses,” your father informed you as your mother gasped at his words. She opposed the idea of this match completely.

“I understand,” you nodded. “Just do whatever it takes so if you fail, I will know you couldn’t possibly do more.”

He reluctantly agreed as he squeezed your cheek as if you were still a little girl. But perhaps it was a good thing that in his eyes you still were one. Because he would do anything to make you happy and fulfil your every whim.

You spotted your father talking to Baron Harkonnen during his nephew’s birthday party but you didn’t want to just stand in the corner and wait for the men to make decisions in your name. Despite your mother’s protests, you approached Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen and bowed slightly in sign of respect. He tilted his head, reminding you of a curious cat. You giggled and he squinted his eyes.

“Na-Baron, I couldn’t wait to meet you in person after seeing you fight in the arena,” you admitted.

“Lady (Y/N),” he greeted you coldly. “I wouldn’t expect such interests from a lady like you.”

“And I expected you would know more about the female nature,” you teased him and visibly angered him although he was trying to be on his best behaviour around guests. “Don’t you know that ladies love violence? The interesting ones at least,” you shrugged your arms.

“I don’t care what ladies like,” he answered. “I always get what I want either way.”

“I’m sure you do,” your eyes sparkled at a possibility of being one of the things he would want to claim for himself.

Most noble women were scared and disgusted after hearing all the stories about Feyd-Rautha and his sexual appetite, his psychotic nature. They would approach him only when needed and tried to stay away as far as possible. You were the very rare breed of women who would actually take interest in him and that intrigued him as he looked you up and down.

You gave him one last smile and walked back to your worried mother who was about to scold you for your reckless behaviour. However, for the rest of the night you kept glancing at the young na-baron and he was looking back.

When you left the party, earlier than most people, you made sure to announce loud and clear that you were about to retire to your chambers. Then you looked deep into his eyes and walked out, followed by a servant. You dismissed her when you were in the guest wing and you continued your journey alone and as slow as possible.

You looked around but Feyd-Rautha seemed not to be following you. At least you could not see nor hear him and for a moment you thought you failed. After all, you were not a skilled seductress, you only did what your heart was telling you to do – your heart and your experience with the animals you loved the most. Cats.

And just like a cat and a skilled assassin that he was, Feyd silently emerged from the darkness when you were just about to open the doors leading to your bedroom. He was standing right behind you and his ominous presence sent a shiver down your spine.

“What are you doing, na-baron?” You swallowed thickly and shivered.

“Don’t pretend,” he whispered in his raspy voice. “You’re not the first spoiled noble lady who wants to use me for pleasure,” he told you. “What is it? Are you bored? Or engaged to an awful lord and you ant to find out what it’s like to have fun before you are forced to spend the rest of your life with him? Honestly, I don’t care,” he admitted and turned you around to face him. His touch was rough and for a second you genuinely felt scared when he trapped you between the doors and his muscular body.

The way he was staring down at you felt as if he was penetrating your soul. Only that his eyes were empty. He was gazing into you but you couldn't gaze back because he didn’t have a soul. There was an endless coldness in his pupils. And so much pain.

“It’s a misunderstanding,” you whispered, almost inaudibly, as the tips of your noses brushed against each other. “I am not one of those women. The only man who can take me will be my husband,” you tried to sound convincing and stern but with a small dose of innocence. He blinked slowly, surprised by your confession.

“I thought you wanted me to follow you,” he insisted.

“No,” you lied. “I was only looking at you because I find you interesting,” you looked down. “But it’s sad what you’ve just told me, my Lord,” you added.

“Why?” Feyd was confused as he took a step back.

“I don’t know… I just think you’re so much more than a toy to use for pleasure,” you looked up again to meet his gaze. “I don’t think you should let those ladies treat you like that. I know you keep telling yourself you like it but it’s not you always getting what you want. It’s them always getting what they want until there is nothing left of you, is it not, na-baron?” You batted your eyelashes and he took another step back, like a predator realising that the prey he had caught was poisonous. “Good night, my Lord… and happy birthday,” you gave him a soft smile and disappeared behind the doors leading to your bedroom.

You couldn’t sleep all night, clutching on the bedsheets and hoping for the best outcome. In the morning your father told you that The Baron was slowly starting to like the idea of your marriage union with his nephew. Apparently, he changed his mind after a conversation with Feyd-Rautha in the early morning.

“I hope you know what you’re doing,” your father warned you at the sight of your wide smile.

“Oh, papa, I always do,” you assured him, already excited about your new pet kitty.

You stayed on Giedi Prime for a month for the courting process but Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen had the privilege of being able to call off the engagement at any moment. That, however, did not happen. He was growing more and more fond of you each day. You were watching him train and walking all around the fortress as he was telling you about his family’s history and culture. You were the most fascinated by the war stories and weapons, always eager to learn more. Always eager to let him steal a kiss here and there, let his hands wander but always stepping back when it would get too heated. You didn’t want him to use you and then discard you. No, he had to be patient for the real reward. Just like cats would lose interest if you let them catch the mouse too quickly.

What you noticed about him, though, was how much he avoided the intimate physical touch. He didn’t mind his opponents striking him or choking him, violating his body in any way, really. But the delicacy was making him flinch and startle to the point of aggression. He wouldn’t lash out at you but he would do that often at the servants. When it was you trying to caress him, he was clenching his jaw and shooting you a deadly glance. The more you knew about him, the more convinced you were that he was just a cat in a human form.

When a month passed, you were scared he would send you away. But instead of doing so, he sent a tailor and a bunch of servants to your room. It was time for you to make all the required fittings for your wedding dress. You sent out the invitations, too. And in the letter addressed to your parents, you mentioned all the things you wanted them to bring you to Giedi Prime.

One of them was your favourite kitty Mephisto.

On the first day of your marriage you were unpacking the boxes from home as Feyd was sitting up in bed and watching you. It was the only day he allowed himself to skip the daily training as the activities between a husband and a wife could count as one, too. However, you required a break and wanted to finally reunite with your favourite items… and your favourite pet.

Feyd’s eyes widened at the sight of a hairless cat in the arms of the servant girl.

“What is that monstrosity?” He asked you.

“That’s Mephisto! My cat!” You took him from the girl’s arms and cuddled him. “Oh, mummy’s been missing you, baby,” you cooed to him and he started to purr.

“You can’t be serious, wife,” Feyd moved closer to inspect the creature with his eyes. Mephisto hissed and you giggled. “That is a cat?”

“You’ve never seen one?” You asked.

“I have. But not like that. It’s ugly,” Feyd scrunched his nose.

“Why ugly?” You gasped and held Mephisto’s head lovingly as if you were protecting him from your husband’s harsh words.

“Cats have fur. This one is so…”

“Bald?” You teased and he closed his mouth, realising the irony. “I have plenty of cats back home but I was aware I couldn’t bring them all here. I chose Mephisto because he is my favourite. We had tough beginnings. He didn’t trust me and he was scratching me a lot. He’s a mean-mean baby,” you leaned in to kiss the cat and Feyd winced as he found it disgusting.

“Do whatever but I don’t want this creature in my chambers,” Feyd stated.

“You’re insane! Mephisto will never leave these chambers. I don’t want him to get lost or hurt in the fortress. Also, he always sleeps with me,” you protested.

Feyd took a deep breath in as he closed his eyes, trying to calm himself down.

“If he scratches one thing… I will throw him out of the balcony door,” he threatened.

“If you do that, I will never speak to you again. And certainly I won’t ever share the bed with you, husband. Mephisto is like a child to me. You can’t threaten me this way. It does nothing but anger me,” you pointed out and cuddled the cat. “Aw, Mephisto, look, daddy’s angry.”

“I am not this thing’s… father,” Feyd drawled through gritted teeth as he stood up to put a robe on. “After all, I think I will go train today.”

“Then go,” you shrugged your arms. “I will cuddle with Mephisto in the meantime because I haven’t seen him in a month.”

Feyd shot you an angry glance.

“You’re not jealous, are you?” You looked up as that sudden realisation hit you.

“No,” he snorted. “Of this thing? Please,” he sneered at you and left the chambers.

“We have lots of work with your new daddy, Mephisto,” you chuckled to the kitty and kissed its head. He meowed at you.

Feyd-Rautha absolutely despised your cat. He hated that you allowed that creature to sleep in bed with you and you were always holding him in your arms. When Feyd was working on paperwork – which he hated – Mephisto would often jump on his desk and bother him. Many times when you were out of the room, Feyd had the urge to grab the creature and throw it out of the balcony or even snap its neck but when he actually extended his hands to catch the cat, the urge disappeared.

First of all, he didn’t want to hurt you. And that was a brand new feeling for him because never before had he cared about someone’s feelings like that. And second of all, the moment the cat was in his arms, Mephisto would start to purr and rub his head on Feyd’s hand or chest. Even though at first he found it disgusting, he quickly started to enjoy it. There was something comforting in the cat’s touch. It was not human and yet so pure. As time passed, he was allowing Mephisto to nap on his lap as he worked on the papers. Of course he would quickly put the cat away whenever someone was coming. He didn’t want anyone to see him so weak.

But he was jealous of the cat, too. He was jealous of the kisses and attention he was getting. The belly rubs and scratches behind the ear. The way Mephisto would curl up and sleep on your chest. Feyd craved it from you, too, but he didn’t know how to allow himself to ask for it. It would be humiliating, he thought, but also dangerous. He wanted to trust you but he was not able to. And whenever you tried to touch him gently, he was haunted by the memories he didn’t want to remember. He didn’t cuddle you at night and he didn’t allow you to do the same. While performing the marital duties, he had a feeling they would be even better if he allowed himself a little gentleness but he just couldn’t let his guard down. Not even around you.

For a long time, Mephisto was the only creature that saw the soft side of your husband. When they were alone in your chambers, Feyd would let him not only nap on him but he would also carry him in his arms and pet him. Sometimes he was starting fights for the cat to scratch and bite him and for Feyd it was great fun. They created a bond that you had no idea about. You kept thinking that your husband despised Mephisto and he didn’t mind you thinking this way.

So, when you spotted a scratch on Feyd’s desk one day, you panicked. You quickly covered it with a few papers laying aside and fixed your hair right before your husband walked inside the chambers that afternoon.

“What are you doing here so early?” You asked as he squinted his eyes at you, suspiciously.

“I have to work on the papers, answer some stupid letters,” Feyd sighed and approached you. He put his hands on your waist and inspected your suspicious face. “Is everything alright, wife?” He asked.

“Yes, my dear, perfectly fine,” you faked a smile. “I have to go and work on the preparations for the event next week,” you reminded him and he nodded before leaning in to give you a possessive kiss. He would give you them a few times a day to remind you to whom you belonged. Not that you minded. After all, you had been wanting this from the moment you had seen him in the arena.

“See you later, then, wife,” Feyd sat by the desk and your heart skipped a beat when you spotted him picking up one of the papers you had used to cover the scratch with. However, he didn’t seem to notice the damage done to his desk. You sighed with relief and left the chambers, hoping that Feyd would continue to be blind when it came to that scratch.

But when you came back to your bedroom two hours later, it was empty. You didn’t expect to see Feyd because he had his other duties to perform on that day. What worried you was the fact you couldn’t find your cat. After crawling all over the floor like a madwoman, trying to see if he was not hiding under any furniture, you just burst into tears in the middle of the carpet. You were sure that Feyd had spotted the scratch and gotten rid of your cat. After all, he had threatened to do so on the very first day of your marriage.

You pulled your knees to your chest and rested your forehead on them as you sobbed, hugging yourself. You could only blame yourself. Your parents had been warning you about the Harkonnens but you still wanted a man like Feyd-Rautha as your husband. Hoping to tame him as it would boost your spoiled ego even further to do that. And now your innocent little kitty was a victim of his fury. Was Mephisto still alive? You hoped so. But even if… how would he survive on Giedi Prime? He would not. And you would not either without him. He was your anchor.

You didn’t want to complain about your husband’s homeplanet because you chose him to be your husband yourself. And some part of you loved him – even though at the moment you weren’t so sure anymore – but it was not a friendly place. And it was not pleasant. It was cold and scary and colourless. Mephisto was reminding you of home. Of your other kittens, of your parents, of the real sunlight. He was also letting you love him like your husband would never do. And he was loving you back… unconditionally. And now he was gone. Your little baby.

You couldn’t tell for how long you had been sobbing like this. It could be hours. When Feyd came back to your chambers, he froze at the sight of you in such a position on the carpet.

“What happened, wife?” He asked as he stood above you. You didn’t answer, too angry at him. He sighed and crouched down to be on your level. “Are you hurt?”

“Yes, I am,” you finally looked at him, furiously. He seemed to be surprised. “I am hurt by what you have done. And now you’re going to pretend that you don’t know what I’m talking about, right? Go to hell. I hate you,” you snapped and hid your face again.

“I don’t understand. Can you explain this to me?” He asked, slowly, trying not to snap back at you.

“Mephisto! You got rid of him!” You sobbed.

“What? I have not…” He stuttered and put his arms on your shoulders to make you look up again. So you did but you were as angry as before.

“Don’t lie to me. You hated that cat and you just threw him away because he scratched your desk. Congratulations, Feyd-Rautha, you got rid of an innocent animal, you won with a sinless little baby; my baby. Are you proud of yourself? Was it a satisfying victory to hurt a little kitty?”

Feyd didn’t answer, he was staring at you as if you were crazy.

“It really feels as if you killed my baby,” you told him. “And I will never forgive you.”

“What are you talking about? I didn’t touch him. What happened?” Feyd shook your arms.

“He’s not here. I don’t know what you’ve done to him but he’s not here,” you sniffled.

“I didn’t do anything!” He protested.

“I don’t believe you!” You moved back, you hated to feel his touch on you. You clumsily stood up and curled on the bed. “I don’t want to see you. Go away. I wanted to love you but you’re rotten to the core. You’re just evil. Unlovable,” you muttered.

You couldn’t know how hurtful your words were. But Feyd didn’t blame you because you couldn’t know his true feelings. And he focused more on Mephisto anyway. He was worried about the kitty, too. So, after a while of staring at you without a word, he put his hand on his hip and looked around, as if he would magically find the cat. He even looked under the bed as your sobs filled the room.

Without a word, Feyd left the bedroom and you hugged your own arms as the pillow under your head was getting wet from your tears.

It was dark already and you were half asleep when the doors opened again. It brought you back from the state of slumber but you felt too hopeless to even lift a hand to turn on the light. You recognised Feyd’s silhouette approaching you so you decided to ignore him completely. Nothing could fix this damage. Never.

You felt him sitting on the edge of the bed while turning the bedside lamp on. You squinted your eyes at the sudden brightness.

“I found him,” Feyd’s whisper made your eyes open as you sat up rapidly, utterly shocked at the sight of Mephisto in your husband’s arms.

“Wh-what?” You asked. At first, your sleepy and foggy brain refused to believe that the cat was really your Mephisto.

“He was hiding in the dungeons,” Feyd explained. “I searched through the whole fortress to find him. Hired half of the guards to help me. My uncle found it hilarious,” Feyd handed you the kitty and you sobbed out of relief. Mephisto was stinking but he was alive and healthy. You hugged him tight to your chest. “One of the servants was not cautious enough and left the doors ajar when she was cleaning here.”

“Which one?” You asked, angrily.

“It doesn’t matter. I have dealt with her already,” Feyd assured you and you nodded.

You suddenly began to feel guilty for the way you had treated your husband before. Now, when Mephisto was back in your arms and it was all thanks to Feyd…

“I didn’t expect you to care so much,” you admitted, not wanting to look up and meet his gaze. Your hands focused on caressing the cat. “That you didn’t want me to be sad.”

“You’re my wife of free choice. I don’t want my wife to be sad,” Feyd nodded. “And I wanted the cat back,” he added. You eventually looked up at him, surprised by his confession.

“You hate him,” you reminded him.

“Not at all,” Feyd smirked nervously and you didn’t say anything to that. You had no idea that he actually liked the cat. You still had a lot to learn when it came to the ways in which your husband would show his affection.

“I was cruel to you,” you whispered. “I am sorry.”

“You had your reasons to be,” he only said. “And you were not wrong about me.”

“I was,” you moved to the side gently, making a space in bed for him to lay there, too.

So he did, without a word. And one of his hands actually caressed Mephisto’s head. The cat began to purr and you realised they had already had a bond that you had just not noticed before.

Hesitantly, you dared to raise one of your hands, too. You gently brushed Feyd’s forehead and then his cheek. He didn’t startle this time and you happily began to explore every curve of his beautiful face with your fingertips.

“You’re funny,” you giggled and he looked up, curiously. “You’re the scariest Harkonnen but you’re also the prettiest,” you admitted and he blushed a little. You had never expected to see him blush. “And look at you, you allow me to touch you.”

“It feels good when you do that,” Feyd closed his eyes just like Mephisto had his own pair shut close. You swore, if your husband was an actual animal, he would start purring under your touch.

You felt proud of yourself to tame him. You had known from the moment you had seen him that you would succeed. But it was not the pride that made your heart swell. It was love. There was something about Feyd-Rautha that just made you want to treat him like a kitty, too. Scratch him behind his ear and let him sleep on your chest. Most ladies would call you insane for that but you knew him in a way they would never know him. You leaned in to place a kiss upon Mephisto’s forehead and then you did the same to Feyd-Rautha.

“I’m sorry I have doubted you,” you whispered to him. “You would never hurt me, am I right?”

He only hummed in response, moving even closer to your body. You smiled to yourself.

“I have tamed you, husband, have I not?”

But he didn’t reply. He was already asleep, snoring lightly. You had never seen his face so relaxed and carefree before. He didn’t have to say anything for you to know the answer.

And as much as you loved Mephisto like your own little baby… You had a new favourite pet now.

MASTERLIST

#feyd rautha x reader #feyd rautha harkonnen x reader #austin butler x reader #lilysfiction

962 notes · View notes

thevoidstaredback · 4 months

Text

"Guys!" Nightwing shouted once he and Batman arrived in the main are of the Bat Cave, "I have some fantastic news!"

Bruce pulled his cowl off, his amusement no longer being hidden as he nearly failed to keep from laughing.

Everyone had gathered in the Cave to await the two who'd gone to the Watchtower, so everyone was already there to hear the exclamation. Even Alfred was with them all.

"Calm down, Big Bird," Jason said from his place on the meeting table, "What's going on?"

Dick was bouncing on the balls of his feet, "Can I tell 'em, B? Can I, can I?!"

Bruce chuckled, "I'm not stopping you."

He cheered before turning back to the rest of his family, "They think there's a total of three-" he held up three fingers on his left hand, "-of us operating within Gotham, myself excluded because I'm in Bludhaven."

"Wait," Stephanie called, "They think Batman only has three people helping to cover Gotham? They know we're human, right?"

Dick shook his head, his grin only getting bigger. "Nope! They think Batman only has two sidekicks covering Gotham with him."

This caused everyone to laugh, the humor breaking any seriousness anyone would've tried to control to keep on topic. It was nice, Bruce smiled, to be able to let loose with everyone like this. His family was altogether, spending time with one another, doing things that didn't include head hunts or injuries.

Alfred took his place beside Bruce. "This is nice, isn't it."

"It is."

"You can die a happy man now?"

A chuckle. "You killing me off so soon?"

"Of course not, Master Bruce," He's smirking, "I'm simply stating a fact."

"Ha!"

"What're you guys talking about over there?" Tim called. Everyone had gathered at the meeting table to go over final details and slight changes for the set up tomorrow. "C'mon! We've gotta finish putting this all together."

Duke nodded from over his shoulder, "Yeah! New information allows room for some much more fun!"

Jason smirked. "Yeah, old man, Alfred! We want to see if we can get away with switching out with each other. It'll confuse the hell outta the Leaguers."

Bruce raised an eyebrow as he and Alfred joined the kids at the table. "How are you going to pull that off? Despite what you all may thing, the others are all a lot more observant than given credit for-"

"Except the Flash and Green Arrow." Cass cut in.

"Hey!" Dick said, "Don't dis Barry like that!"

"Yeah," Barbra agreed, "And Ollie's whole thing is spotting details. He prides himself on it!"

"If that were true, then we wouldn't be planning on how to mess with them, now would we?"

Tim nodded, "Damian's right."

"As you were saying?" Bruce prompted.

"Well," Jason continued, "You, Damian, and Dick have to be here as Batman, Nightwing, and Robin. They all probably know about me, so I'll stay out of the Cave, but you can bet your ass that I'll be in the Clocktower with Babs, listening in on everything." He looked to Tim and Babs. "Should we set up cameras?"

Tim thought for a second, "If we want to record this, then yeah. I can have them all set up by morning."

"I'll help you set it up before I head out tonight," Barbra agreed.

"Anyway," Stephanie interrupted, pulling the attention to herself, "Tim, Cass, and I could totally get away with running around and messing with their senses and shit. And if we can get Kate and Selina in on this-"

"You've already talked to them, haven't you." Bruce asked. The matching grins on everyone's faces was answer enough. He sighed.

"Having fun," Cass patted his arm, "Bonding."

He snorted. 'Bonding', yeah right. Maybe letting his coworkers be the target of his childrens' whims is a bad idea. Then again, their not hurting anyone. It's all fun in games.

Bruce sat at the head of the table. "Alright. We all know about Superman's ability to hear heartbeats and breathing patterns. He's able to memorize someone's vitals, especially his friends. It's safe to assume he's got mine down, as well as Robin's and Nightwing's."

Damian scoffed. "Changing my vitals will be no issue for me."

Bruce nodded, "Me, either."

Dick nodded along, "Soundseasy enough. But what's the plan?"

"Oracle will call you out for an emergency in Bludhaven. Red Hood will call me out for some information at the docks. We'll met up at the Clocktower and switch costumes." he explained.

Barbra had a manic look on her face. "We should have Steph and Cass stay away from the Cave at first, then have them come in separately, but sharing a costume." SHe turned her attention to the blonde. "You have a spare Spoiler costume, yeah?"

Stephanie matched her grin, "Naturally."

"What about me, Tim, and Damian?" Duke asked.

"How would you and Tim like to be actual bats?" the red head wondered, "Or maybe ghosts?"

"Do we get to mess with shit?" Tim asked.

"Naturally."

"I'm in," the two responded.

"Damian will run distraction," Jason said," He'll be the only one who stays with the JL the whole time they're here. Alfred will have to keep cover upstairs. I'll bounce between the Manor, the Clocktower, and patrol."

"Are you quite sure?" Alfred asked, "That's quite a lot to be doing."

"Yeah, I'll be fine," he assured.

Brice cleared his throat. "If everyone's ready?" Looks around the table before nods of affirmation. "Good. Finish up any last minute changes and preparations. They've agreed to meet at the Watchtower at fifteen hundred New Jersey time so that I can bring them here. Damian, I want you to come with me."

"Of course, father."

"Ready? Break."

Part 3 Part 5

Tag List: @sebas-nights

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readsaboutreid · 2 months

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Permanent Solution | S.R.

cw: big big warning for suicidal ideation (first person POV so you get some of the full on thought spiraling) typical criminal minds violence (reader gets kidnapped by an unsub and tortured but it doesn’t get too descriptive), extreme angst, Morgan being a dick at first (I love him but he was the only person I could really see for the role he fills in the plot with his tell it like it is vibes) but he gets his redemption in pt 2 i promise

no request for this one i had a real bad day and needed to use my thought spiral in some sort of creative outlet to get myself out of it so i took it out on spencer and reader sorry in advance y'all

"None of us like you."

The words rattled around in my brain as I walked absent-mindedly, my destination already in the back of my mind. I hadn't made this walk in five months. The five months before that had been focused on reducing the number of times I took this path.

First, the goal had been to reduce the number of times I felt compelled to take this particular walk. Walks overall weren't out of the question, and were actually encouraged. Especially walks where I shared the company with someone else. But this specific one was different. It carried a different weight. The initial goal set with my therapist had been to reduce how often I walked this path from nearly every night to no more than two or three times a week, substituting it with a different path through a different and more active part of town. After that, the goal was to move to only walking this path once a week. Then, ideally, none at all.

Ten months. Ten months of twice-weekly therapy sessions down the drain. With five measly words. I started to wonder what Spencer would say if he knew where I was headed, but shook my head free of the thought. He'd be better off in the end, anyways. The wind bit into my cheeks and I tugged the green cardigan that hung loosely off my shoulders so that it was tighter around me, the only protection from the cold that seeped down into my bones. I began to walk faster as I shivered, trying anything I could to warm up my body even just a little bit, and thought back to the encounter from earlier that had caused me to spiral so suddenly and severely.

"—none of us like you," Morgan said to me, cutting me off right as I was attempting to defend my previous decision to turn down the previous drink night invitations in the twelve months since I'd been at the BAU, resulting in Spencer also turning them down and going home with me, instead for the last eleven out of twelve of those months. The expression on his face matched the complete and utter disdain dripping from each and every word. "Not even Hotch, who got you the job in the first place, seems to want you on the team anymore. The only person who ever wants you to be around is Reid, and none of us can figure out why." When he finished I took a look around the table to see everyone else just looking down and avoiding my gaze, including Penelope, who had become somewhat of a sister to me in the past year.

"You—," my voice caught in my throat at that point and I cleared it, trying to sound as steady as I could as I asked, "A-all of you share this sentiment?" Despite strength I had tried to muster to ask that question, my voice only came out thick and wavery, and it was all I could do to keep my lip and lower jaw from trembling. I had tried as hard as possible to overcome myself since starting at the BAU, to believe that the people around me genuinely enjoyed my presence and didn't secretly roll their eyes and sigh in relief when I left the room, but apparently I had failed to make them like me and that's exactly what they felt.

"You'll have to excuse me, please," I gasped as the information presented to me sank in. I then stood, my eyes swimming with tears, and ran from the table they had all situated themselves into at the bar, only to run head on into Spencer, who grabbed my by the shoulders with a soft laugh and gentle smile.

"Easy there, (Y/N)," he chuckled while steadying me. It was only then that he realized something was wrong and his smile was immediately replaced with a concerned frown. "Hey, what's wrong, angel?" I shook my head, shook free of his grasp, and kept making for the door, my head slowing down a bit as I finally was able to take in a breath of fresh air as I made it outside.

Spencer hastily followed after me, right at my heels. "(Y/N)! (Y/N), wait!" He called after me, pushing his way through the crowd and finally out the door as well before wrapping me tightly in his arms. "Hey, now, what's wrong, love?" He cooed as he pressed my head into his chest and wrapped his cardigan around my shoulders when he felt me tremble.

I hesitated, debating what to say to him. I could either tell him the truth and earn the further ire of our colleagues by snitching or I could do what I do best: blow every thing up so there would be nobody else to blame but myself. I opted for the latter.

With a deep, shuddering breath, I finally managed to force the words from my throat. Each one stabbed into my chest with the force of a dull butter knife. "I— th-this—," I stumbled, "th-this isn't working, Spencer." My voice was barely above a whisper by the end when I finally met his eyes, which quickly filled with tears at hearing my words.

"Wh-what?" The word came out as nothing more than a breath but within it I swear I could hear the crack in his chest that echoed the one in my own. "Why— wh-what— I don't— where is this coming from?"

"I'm sorry," I said through soft sobs before I turned and ran off, leaving him standing on the sidewalk with tears slowly beginning to fall down his cheeks.

I had broken his heart, ensuring that he, too, would hate me. That was the plan. I had to push him away and make him hate me as much as the rest of them so that it would hurt him less when they found me. I made the last turn and found myself at my destination - the 11th Street bridge.

Spencer stood on the sidewalk, staring after her long after she had disappeared around the corner up ahead. He ran through the events of the past hour, trying to figure out what he could have done.

"You can go without me, Spencer," she protested as he tried to convince her to go out for drink night with the rest of the team.

"Please come with me? It will be fun, I promise!" It was a strange reversal for him to be the one trying to coax someone else into going out. Usually it was Morgan trying to convince him to go out (Garcia had literally forced him to go out with her after a particularly rough case or two), but now he decided to pay it forward to get his girlfriend to come out with their team and have some much needed fun. "What's the worst that could happen?"

"What if they don't actually want me there?" She asked, her voice small and timid.

"That's ridiculous! Why wouldn't they want you there? You're amazing," he smiled at her, starting to pepper her face with kisses in an attempt to cheer her up. She giggled quietly, not really trying as she made to push him away. He continued his assault, kissing her cheeks, forehead, nose, and lips, over and over with light pecks. When she finally acquiesced, he was giddy with excitement and felt a swell of pride in his chest at the progress she had made since they met.

As they stepped out of his car he grabbed her hand and saw her face twist with anxiety. He gave her hand a soft, reassuring squeeze before his phone rang, the number for the mental facility his mother currently resided in showing on the screen. "I need to take this, head on inside and I'll be right there, okay angel?" She swallowed nervously and walked inside, and he took the call.

5 minutes and 29 seconds.

That's how long he had been on the phone. Whatever had happened had taken only 5 minutes and 29 seconds. And it ended his relationship.

Spencer found himself pushing the door open and walking back inside the bar. His blood rushed in his ears as he approached the table and stared at all of his coworkers.

"What happened?" He asked, his voice just loud enough to be heard above the music.

"Reid," Morgan started, but Spencer cut him off. "Don't look at us like th—"

"Whatever was said in the 5 minutes and 29 seconds I was on the phone with my mother's hospital resulted in me getting dumped on the sidewalk outside when not even 30 minutes ago (Y/N) was laughing, and smiling, and happy. So what. Happened?" He seethed.

"Alright, you want to know what happened, Reid?" Morgan snapped, preparing to stand up and tell him off before being stopped by Penelope, who looked as though she was still on the verge of tears.

“Reid, I’m sorry,” she whispered as she stood up instead, standing in front of Spencer. “I should have stopped him,” she continued, shaking her head. “I shouldn’t have let him talk to her like that.”

“What did he tell her?” Spencer turned to Garcia, interrupting Derek as he opened his mouth to interject.

“I told her the truth,” Morgan slurred, finishing off what the rest of them knew was his fourth glass of whiskey. Spencer opted to ignore his clearly drunk colleague and continued to address Garcia.

“Garcia, what did he say to my girlfriend?” Spencer insisted, his anger being slowly replaced by a sense of growing dread.

“He— he told her nobody wanted her around,” she admitted, her eyes closing and her face twisting with guilt before she hastily added, “which of course that’s not the case! I love (Y/N) like she’s my own sister...” Spencer felt his heart drop into the pit that had become his stomach as his fears were confirmed.

“But?” Spencer added, tilting his head to the side, his voice growing quieter as the conversation continued.

“...but the rest of us miss you, Spence,” JJ finally spoke up. “We haven’t seen you in ages outside of work! If she’s keeping you from spending time with your friends, that's a little bit of a red flag, isn't it?” She reasoned, standing to put a hand on his bicep to calm him.

He angrily shook her off, the anxiety coursing through his veins shifting back into an icy rage. “She hasn’t kept me from doing anything, Jennifer,” he spat through gritted teeth as he held her gaze, which was a mix of shock and hurt at his tone.

“Spence, I just meant that—” JJ started, but was immediately interrupted by Spencer, whose rage was steadily growing to the point where he was certain he was visibly trembling.

“In fact, she has been continually insisting that I leave her behind to come out with you all, but given that I don’t drink much to begin with I usually just opt for a night in with her. I didn’t realize I needed permission from the rest of the team to make that decision for myself,” he bit back before turning to leave.

“Where are you going, Reid? Reid! Come on, man, be reasonable!” Morgan called out, only for Spencer to ignore him and keep walking. If he stayed there any longer, he knew he would end up saying something he’d regret, and with the way most of them were talking about his girlfriend—ex-girlfriend—he figured they’d find some way to blame her for his outburst if he did.

When he finally exited the bar, he felt a hand wrap around his wrist and he turned on his heel, preparing for another round of arguing, only to be met with the now tear-streaked cheeks of Penelope Garcia.

“What do you want, Garcia?” He snapped, his face softening as he took in her apologetic expression.

“I— I’m sorry, Spencer,” she whispered. “I should have told Derek to shut up, I’m so sorry! I just— I hate when the people I love start fighting like that! I shut down and— and I know I should have stood up for her but I just— I just froze like a coward and—” her voice grew more frantic and upset before Spencer cut her off.

“Garcia, it’s not your fault,” Spencer sighed, his anger fading away until the only thing he felt was the ache in his chest. “Derek was drunk and belligerent. You’re not responsible for his actions.” He paused as he took a deep, shuddering breath. “I just wish I could have been there to put a stop to it. She’s so sweet, and kind, and utterly terrified of people. I shouldn’t have sent her in by herself knowing that." His voice cracked as a fresh wave of tears started to fall down his own cheeks.

“Spencer, you had no way of knowing any of this would happen,” Penelope wrapped Spencer in a tight hug, and he finally broke down. His body shook gently with soft, nearly silent sobs and he cried into her shoulder. “I’m so sorry, Spencer. I know how much you love her.” Garcia’s own voice cracked as her heart ached for the crying boy in her arms.

“Wh— what do I do, Penelope?” He mumbled into the sleeve of her sweater. “I just want to help her feel better.” That’s all he’d wanted since he’d first laid eyes on her. He’d never forget how emaciated she had looked, her skin pallid and her eyes nothing more than dim, lifeless pits with dark bruise-like rings underneath them.

“Everyone, I’d like you to meet Dr. (Y/L/N). She just graduated from the academy and has expertise in psycholinguistics as well as a doctorate in neuropsychology, so I have no doubt she’ll be an excellent addition to the team.”

Spencer had tried his hardest in the two months after that initial introduction to get to know her, to understand why she looked like a reanimated corpse (albeit a very beautiful one) who had just wandered out of a morgue. Over those two months, the two of them had grown closer and closer, thanks to much insistent pushing from him. At first, it came in the form of attempting to get her to join the rest of them for drinks at their bar of choice (the others would never invite her themselves but Spencer would insist to her that it was okay, that she was a part of the team), but quickly he realized that all might be a bit too much for her. So, one night, he told the team he wasn’t feeling up to going out and instead privately asked (Y/N) if she’d want to join him for pizza and a movie at his place since he wasn't feeling up to big crowds and he had a feeling neither was she. He had been prepared to be turned down but was pleasantly surprised when her face showed the slightest expression of piqued interest and she agreed.

He then started to skip out on pretty much all of the future invitations to go out for drinks with the rest of the team, opting instead to go home for pizza and Doctor Who or Star Trek marathons with her, and he started seeing a whole other side to her that no one else had even suspected could have existed. She’d slowly opened to him, occasionally letting out quiet and restrained laughs at his goofy jokes and puns at the beginning of their friendship.

Eventually, those soft titters grew into ebullient, beautiful laughs that were like music to his ears. Her smiles went from being forced and never meeting her eyes to lighting up her entire face, at times so brightly that Spencer swore she could illuminate a dark room with nothing but her smile. She showed that there was a side to her that was goofy, outgoing, and full of life.

It was around then (November 17 at 11:57 PM) that their relationship had started officially with a soft, tentative kiss goodnight; but from the very first time he heard her let out a soft, breathy giggle at his goofy joke about Spock having three ears (‘a left ear, a right ear, and a final front-ier!’), Spencer knew that he would marry her someday.

Or at least he had thought so, until tonight.

“Give her some space to sort out her emotions, Spencer,” the voice of Penelope Garcia in his ear dragged him back into the present, her arms still wrapped tightly around him. “She loves you more than anything, and we both know that.” She let go and gave him a teary smile before wiping her cheeks.

“You’re right,” he replied, taking in another deep, shuddering breath. “Plus, she walked away with my cardigan, and we both know she’s a stickler about returning borrowed clothing!” He attempted a joke, but the laugh he tried to give after cracking it came out more like another choked sob.

“If I were you, I’d just give her a quick phone call and let her know that you love her no matter what anyone else says or thinks, okay? She needs to know that more than she needs anything else right now.”

“Right. Yes, you’re right,” he muttered, wiping his eyes on his shirt sleeve. “Thank you, Penelope.”

“I’m always here for you, Spencer,” she smiled at him before adding, “both of you. Now, if you'll excuse me, I must go tear Agent Morgan a new asshole for getting you dumped and hurting my best friend.” She took a second to shake her head and rub her own cheeks to dry them. “Call me once she makes it home safely to you, okay? Promise?” He nodded quietly. “Uh-uh-uh, what was it that one kid had told you a while back? ‘A promise doesn’t count unless you say it out loud,’ right?”

“I promise,” Spencer felt a small smile tugging on the corner of his lips. He then walked down the block to his car, got in, and drove home to wait for (Y/N).

When he arrived and had walked through the doorway, he pulled his cell phone from his pocket and dialed her number. It rang four times and then went to her voicemail.

“Hi, you’ve reached the voicemail of Dr. (Y/L/N), I can’t come to the phone right now but if you leave your name and number, I’ll return your call as soon as I am able. Thanks!” Beep.

“Hi, (Y/N). So, Penelope filled me in on everything that happened,” he began shakily, and took a deep breath before he continued. “I’m so sorry that I wasn’t there to stop Morgan from saying all of that, but please, please know that no one hates you, I promise. Penelope assured me that she was going to tear him a new one for what he said, and I promised her that I’d call her once you made it home safely.” He paused, searching for his next words carefully, and settled on, “I love you so much, angel. Please, please never forget that.” And then he had to hang up the phone, his eyes filling with more tears.

He made his way to the couch and sat down, turning the TV on and finding a marathon of Buffy the Vampire Slayer playing. Knowing it was her favorite show, he left it on and patiently waited. On the couch sat a small stuffed cat with a blue and white spotted mushroom for a head that he had gifted her on a whim, Dr. Mewshroom, as she had taken to calling it. He grabbed Dr. Mewshroom and hugged it close to his chest as he leaned back on the couch and eventually dozed off.

I paced up and down the 11th Street bridge for an hour before I decided to hop up and sit on the railing. My walking had warmed me up significantly, so I shed the cardigan Spencer had wrapped around my shoulders. Hopefully, it would be returned to him when they eventually found me. I stared down into the dark water beneath my dangling feet and tried to find the courage within me to jump, but I couldn’t give myself the final push I needed, just like all of the previous times I’d made this trip.

I must have sat there for fifteen more minutes or so before I decided to give it up and go home to Spencer. Maybe, if I begged and pleaded with him, he’d take me back. I checked my phone to see that I had a missed call from him. Weird, I hadn’t even heard it ring. Before I could turn myself around to hop off the railing, I was grabbed from behind and a cloth was pressed to my mouth and nose, blocking me from screaming. My nose and throat filled with a burning sensation before everything faded to black...

#criminal minds fandom #criminal minds #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid x fem!reader #criminal minds fanfic #spencer x reader #spencer reid #heavy angst #spencer reid angst #spencer reid fic #angst

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gguk-n · 28 days

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Chapter 5- Racing for Love

Unravelling Max's Mystery (Max Verstappen x Online Friend!Reader)

Series Masterlist

Summary- Y/N spends her time in Netherland with Max while his girlfriend no where to be seen. They spend Christmas and New Year together. Y/N can't get over Max; maybe it's for the best. Max realised he loves her.

{Reader's POV}

I headed back to the hotel after the race to get dressed and meet up with Max. Every one was going to be celebrating Max's win at the club. All the drivers were also joining, making it the perfect opportunity for us to meet. I was so excited. I wore a navy blue body con midi dress, it made me look and feel hot. I had told Max I'd meet him there, yet he insisted on picking me up. I was almost done getting ready when Max knocked on my door. I opened it to a much cleaner Max. I grabbed my purse and headed out with Max. "Is your girlfriend in the car?" I asked walking along with him. "No" he answered and then we walked in silence to the car. On the way there I asked again, "Is she meeting us there?" "No" he replied shortly. "Why?" I asked again. "She went back home" Max said in a tone that meant he didn't wanna talk about it anymore.

At the party, I had a lot of fun. I got to meet everyone who were very kind, welcoming and funny. They were all shocked that Max had a friend for so long that no one knew about, Charles and Lando included. We laughed, we drank, Max was pretty sober, not having touched a drink since we got there. "Why aren't you drinking?" I slurred having gulped down my previous shot of vodka, I'd lost the count of how much I had to drink since I got handed a glass as soon as one finished. "I drove here, we need to drive back to the hotel" he replied. "OHHHHH, LET'S DANCE" I shouted over the loud music. "You should go, I'm good here." Max replied while preventing Lando from toppling over. I sauntered my way to the dance floor, a guy had made my acquaintance as soon as I started dancing and we were having a lot of fun until, Max came dragging me back to where we were sat. "Max, I'm having fun. Lemme go" I whined trying to pull my hand away from his but drunk me wasn't very strong. "Drink some water and then we're leaving." he stated. "What? But we just got here. Look at all those bottle" I pointed at the bottles behind the bartender, "I need to sample those" I cried. "You can sample the alcohol later. We don't want you to get alcohol poisoning." he said shaking his head. "I have a good tolerance. SEE" I said while finally breaking free from him to try to walk in a straight line only to fail miserably and almost fall. I was only saved by Max's crazy fast reflexes, who caught me at the right moment and carried me over his shoulder back to his car, all the while I was screaming. "PUT ME DOWN....MAXIE.....YOU'RE MAKING ME DIZZY....PLEASE....I THINK I'M GONNA puke" I puked as soon as he put me down next to his car; thankfully having the brain to stop myself from puking all over his expensive car. I brushed the back of my right hand against my lips after puking, "Thank god I didn't puke on your car. haha. I don't think I can afford to clean it" I laughed. He handed me a bottle of water and got me in the car after that. The hang over wasn't as bad as I had expected it to be; maybe because Max got me medicines to help.

I spent the next few days in Zandvoort going to some of the very few places Max was allowed to go and have fun as a kid. We even went go karting. It was a shitty feeling racing against a World Champion since that idiot can't just enjoy the race. He had to make everything a competition. How did he expect me to win when this was the first time I was karting while he did this as a living for many years. We had bet on the fact that the loser had to do whatever the winner wanted; in all my confidence I had said yes, I had forgotten that my opponent was Max Verstappen. Yet, when he won after one pout, Max forgot he's the winner and let me get what I wanted since it was technically cheating since this wasn't his first time and it was mine. So, that's how we ended up watching Barbie at the end of the day. As I wiped away tears, I saw that Max was also wiping away tears. I'm never gonna let him hear the end of this.

The next few days were a blur, I tried to make the best of the situation since I wasn't sure when I would get to meet Max again. I packed up my stuff, a question still lingered on my mind; where the fuck was his girlfriend?. So, I decided to have this conversation in the car where he wouldn't be able to escape me like he did the last few days. Max carried my stuff to his car and loaded it in the car. I sat down on the passenger seat waiting for Max to come. We drove off towards the airport when I said, "Maxie, I haven't seen your girlfriend since the race. I was really looking forward to getting to know her" "Oh, umm" he sighed, "Actually, we broke up" he said while looking straight ahead. "What? Why? Is it because you hugged me first at the race. Fuck, should I apologise?" I rambled. "Schat, nonsense. We hadn't been getting along for a while. I'd been thinking about breaking up with her for a while, it just happened when you were there. It's not your fault" he clarified. My shoulders sank while I waited to get to the airport. I bid Max a good bye and he promised to come visit or have me visit during the off season. I promised to meet him soon. With a heavy heart, Max disappeared in the crowd as I walked into the airport.

We went back to our previous routine of talking on video calls. I ended being spoiled a lot more now that he knew where I lived because I would come home to a new package I didn't remember ordering at my front door when I returned from work. If I asked him why, and he'd just shrug it off and say that it was something that reminded him of me when he was in that country for the race. After a few packages, it was overwhelming me. I felt like I was using my rich friend for financial gain. We were on call after I had opened up a package I got from Brazil. Y/N- Max, you can't keep sending me so much stuff. There was a box full of trinkets and snacks from Brazil. Max- It was nothing, did you like it? Y/N- No Max- oh ok, what do you want? I can get that for you? Y/N- Maaaaxxxxx, that's not what I meant. You have to stop sending me stuff now. It's getting over whelming. Max- But...I just wanted to bring a little something back from every race. Y/N- Yes, do that for yourself. Not me Max- I've always wanted to take you along to races and bring you stuff back from races since I've known you. Now that I can, let me make up for all the lost time. Y/N- I get the sentiment Max, I do, but no. It's making me feel crappy since I'm not able to get you anything. I enjoy our friendship, I do not want to feel like I'm using you. Max- You're not using me. I'm using myself, honestly. Y/N- I don't want to come home to anymore packages any more. If you really want to get me something, think about it for a couple time. One or two items that you would like to get for me, is perfectly fine. Max- Ok...I really wanted to get you things though. Y/N- You can tell me about your weekend. I'll listen but this is overbearing to me. Finally he got what I meant.

We ended up making a plan for the off season. Max had won the season with the amount of points he had scored. It was a given that he was gonna be the World Drivers Champion for 2023. So, I wanted to celebrate it with him. He offered to fly me out to Abu Dhabi for the race which would not be possible since I had work. That's why we planned to spend the Christmas break together. I did suggest leaving a few days before Christmas so he can spend it with his family but he was vehemently against it. I had started Christmas shopping in November, could've done it earlier. I got Max an ugly Christmas sweater with the grinch and a matching one for myself. It would be like a friendship bracelet. We would be spending the holiday in Monaco because of the privacy and I wanted to get away from here for a few days at least. I kind of wanted to clear my feeling for Max during this trip too. Being on the receiving end of Max's affection with gifts or the phone calls wasn't easy when you were in love with him. He made it so difficult to try and get over him when he would sweet talk his way back into my heart whenever I thought I didn't like him in that way.

I had sent my collection to the author I was editing for currently since she wanted to read it ever since I mentioned that I wrote. I sent her the email a couple days after going over the collection one last time. It was exciting and nerve wrecking. Maybe getting the opinion of a fellow author would help me make it better and improve it, if need be.

The last race of the season was upon us. Max was crowned the World Driver's Champion for the third time. I texted him as soon as the race ended and congratulated him. I couldn't believe that I got to witness a Max win. The day couldn't get any better when I got a call from the author I was editing for who said that she loved the collection of poems I sent her and she wanted to help me get it published under the publication she worked for. She had been working for that publication for so long and was the biggest earner that they couldn't deny her request. In her defence, she said that the poems were so good that any one stupid would only reject it. I was asked to edit it and the author was an angel to help me out. Her reasoning was that this was a mutually beneficial relationship since she hadn't enjoyed working with someone as much as she enjoyed working with me.

Winter break couldn't come any sooner. I had packed my bags; no work, done with my editing side gig. I couldn't wait to hang out with Max. The flight there felt so long, maybe it was the excitement of wanting to see him. Max was waiting for me at the airport when I got there. A big smile on his face as I walked towards him. I wrapped my arms around his neck as I hugged him. He twirled me around a little before putting me down. We walked back to the car with my bag in Max's hand. The ride there was filled with a lot of talking on Max's part. Hearing him go on about what he loved was the warmest feeling. "The cats are so excited to see you" he said. "So, you aren't?" I joked. "What no" he was flustered. "I'm excited to." he mumbled a tint of red visible on his cheeks. My heart leapt in my chest as I watched him blush. What if I wasn't delusional? What if he liked me? I thought.

At his home, the cats were a little cautious of the stranger that had entered their space but recognised me quickly by my voice and a few hours later I was sat with both of them sat on either side of me; petting the two with both of my hands. Max snapped a picture of us sat on the couch. "Can't believe this is the life you live" I said petting his cats, a soft purring exuding from both. "Having cats is the best thing ever" I almost screamed from excitement. Max laughed. "I might kidnap them" I suggested. Max shook his head, "You will do no such thing"

The next few days leading up to Christmas were a a blur, we spent time around the city, walking around and site seeing. Max was a great tour guide since he stored the most random information in his head. He gave me a quick history lesson on a lot of the places we went to. We walked along the track in Monaco since I wanted to. We went hiking; I was very out of shape is the conclusion I've come too. We spent the day leading up to Christmas cooking at home and decorating the place. This was the first time since I moved out from my parents place did I end up celebrating Christmas.

We ended up sleeping on the couch as we watched Christmas movies after tiring our self out with the decoration. I woke up in Max's arms, a warm fuzzy feeling erupted in my stomach as I watched soft snores emit from Max's lips. I carefully pried myself out of Max's grasp. When I returned, I found a disheveled Max sat on the couch. "where did you go?" he asked while rubbing his eyes. "I had to pee" I said, now sitting down on the couch beside him. "Should we open presents?" I asked. "Lemme freshen up" Max mumbled while getting up. He came back, much more awake and with 2 cups of coffee for us. We drank in silence until Max brought his present for me from under the tree and handed it to me. There were a few actually; a book on Formula One with Max's face on it, a pendent with a sapphire stone and a stupid coffee cup saying 'best friends forever'. I smiled as I held the cup against my lips acting like I was sipping coffee. "Thank you Maxie" I said. He just smile. "Now, it's your turn." I said. He grabbed the other presents; which included an ugly sweater, a Sid from Ice Age plushy and a perfume from Max's favourite brand. "These are a lot of things" he said. "Yeah, I wanted to spoil you" I smiled. "I feel spoilt" he smiled back. "I got us matching ugly sweater" I said while going to grab mine. We ended up putting our sweaters on. "I didn't tell you but I got signed by a publication" I said while Max inspected his sweater. He looked up with shock and happiness in his eyes. He quickly hugged me, "I'm so proud of you. I knew you could do it" he said while hugging me. I hugged back, "Thank you for believing in me" I said with tears in my eyes.

Christmas was a weird day, we had Turkish kabab because Max wanted to. I wasn't one to say no to delicious food. The days between Christmas and New Year were a bit of a blur honestly. On new year's eve, we went out with a couple of his friends. I had decided not to drink my weight in alcohol. As we all counted down the time to new year, the excitement palpable. When the clock struck 12, I was pulled towards the guy next to me who had made acquaintance much to Max's dismay. He pressed his lips against my lips, easing me into a kiss. When I pulled away to look at Max, who's eyes flashed hurt. I hugged Max wishing him a happy new year. We left a little while later. Max was uncharacteristically quite as we drove home.

We never spoke about the silent treatment Max gave me on the way back from the club. I left Monaco a few days after. Our friendship returning to it's long distance status. With Max having to train for the next season and me having to prepare for school and my book.

The next few months were a blur with both of us quite busy. Max kept is his streak of winning the races and watching him win was a proud feeling. He would call me at the end of the day to discuss what happened and I enjoyed listening to him even though I didn't know shit about cars.

I spent the entirety of my spring break and summer break with Max, travelling to his races; which he insisted I joined. The feelings I had for him only grew. I tried to keep myself in check but all the small things he would do made it impossible. He was caring and sweet and kind, and most of all my first love that I had a hard time moving on from.

His summer break was spent lounging around my house. He accompanied me to the launch of my book; going as far as to promote it on his socials. People had started to speculate that there was something going on in between us. Max didn't really answer those questions or even try to kill the rumours. He got me a big bouquet of my favourite flowers when he came to the book launch. We went out for dinner to celebrate; ending up on all the tabloids the next day. I apologised to Max about the mess but he was unbothered, a little smile played on his face after he read the articles but nothing more.

After the summer break, Max was flying out to Netherland, for his home race. I couldn't join him due to there being a few tests I needed to grade but promised to be there for the race. I flew in the morning of the race, Max showing up at the airport to pick me up. He wouldn't let me be on my own, if he was there. We caught up on the stuff that happened in the 2 days we didn't speak. It felt like routine talking to Max. If we didn't, it felt like my day had gone my horribly and everything that could go wrong would go wrong. There was comfort in Max's voice and his arms whenever he hugged me.

I accompanied Max to the paddock, the cheers loud. Last year, was the first time I was here, this year it felt so familiar even though it was only my second time. Max wasn't starting pole but he could still finish first since he was in the front row. The race started off with Max over taking Lando at turn 1. The chance of Max wining his home race for the fourth time seemed more likely. But as the race went on, Max lost his P1 to Lando who kept the distance between him and Max a constant. Making Max finish P2, the way he started. He got out of the car to find me and his team waiting for him. I mouthed a congratulations as he walked towards me. He had tears in his eyes, "I wanted to ask you out as a race winner." he said wiping his tears. My heart skipped a beat; "You can still ask me out" I suggested. "But I'm scared of what you'll say" he muttered. "My answer would be the same, whether you were P1 or P2" I said. "And what's that?" he asked expectantly. "I would love to go out with you, Maxie" I said with a smile and tears in my eyes. Max almost jumped when he heard me, "Go on and finish up. We have a lot to talk about" I said pushing him towards the media pen.

I was waiting in his driver's room just like last year. But this time it was different, there were butterflies in my stomach and I couldn't stop smiling. I found myself pacing around the room, imagining what we would say. I was pulled out of my thought by Max now standing at the door. "Hi" he greeted shyly. "Hey" I replied, sitting on the sofa followed by Max. We sat facing each other, he took my hands in his, "Lifde, I can't believe this" he began. "me neither" I chimed in. "I've liked you for so long, I don't remember a time I didn't like you since I've known you" I continued. Max couldn't help but smile. "I didn't think you felt the same" I said. "I didn't think you felt the same either." He added. "Y/N I really wanted to win this race and ask you out as a race winner." He sulked. "You're already a race winner and a three time champion at that. I couldn't ask for more. Plus I couldn't care less; to me you'll always be a winner" I said. He took my face in his hands, "Can I kiss you?" he asked softly. I nodded. His lips inched closer to mine before they touched, our eyes fluttered close, his lips dry and chapped against my soft shiny glossed lips. Our lips moved in synchrony, tilting our head as we deepened the kiss. His hand trailing down from my cheek to my waist to pull me closer, I was now sat on his lap. I pulled away breathless, our foreheads touching, breaths intermingling, eyes locked; "I love you Y/N" he stated. "I have for a while. I didn't know how to say it. I'm glad not winning pushed me over the edge" "I love you too, Maxie. Can't wait to celebrate your fourth championship" I said. "You think?" he asked. "I know" I said, cupping his cheeks to kiss him again. His hands on my waist pulled me closer, as if it was even possible. "Will you be my girlfriend?" he asked in between kisses. "Yes" I breathed out as we continued to kiss.

When god sends blessings, it becomes hard to count. I got the man of my dreams and the stepping stone to my career goals.

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daddyricsdoll · 10 months

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Friends? ✭ Ollie Bearman

Summary: You and Ollie were just friends, no matter how much your feelings grew or your need for his lips against yours. Well that was what you thought when you found someone else to put your mind to for the evening, but maybe not with Ollie's furrowed brows and glares.

Warnings: Unprotected sex

Word count: 1.9k

A/N: If only the things I write were true. Based off of this request. Please Enjoy!!

My hands clench around the handle of my suitcase as I walk out of the doors of the Abu Dhabi international airport. Expecting to be greeted by my Ollie, and I was right when my eyes made contact with his brown ones. A wide grin compliments his pigmented cheeks as we both make quick steps toward each other.

Simultaneously our arms wrap around the other for a refreshing and long awaited embrace. I had missed him, my dear friend I love too much that others claim it’s more than friendship. But he’s so oblivious that I’ve had to shut my feelings down, but every time he speaks a word to me or brushes against my skin, it lingers, and it’s not like I want it to stop.

I finally realise we still both hold each other before I suddenly let go and we pull away. He looks at me with that one smile everyone knows, but this one has a glint in his eyes that I know all too well, not from the times he’s looked at me but other girls that have run after him at races or passed him on the streets. I want to give in, I want to grab him, but then comes the reminder of him claiming we’re great friends, but who said friends can’t be more? Especially if we're already great together.

Just seconds later it’s like I break out of this “trance” and I see that I’m seated in the backseat with Ollie next to me. We catch each other up on everything, what he did during his break when we weren’t together or my uneventful life without him.

I have to keep reminding myself that we can’t be more than what we already are, which brings me to my conclusion of finding a distraction, or something better than Ollie- if it exists. I hear his soothing voice again and then I make out the words he tells me. “There’s a party, well an event kind of thing tonight, all of the drivers will be there as well as a few other important people and I just wanted to see if you wanted to come?” It takes me a few moments to think of my answer, but I eventually nod and we both plan our arrival together.

Four hours go by fast and the next thing me and Ollie sit next to each other in a taxi, going to the venue of the event. Ollie wears a simple black suit with a white dress shirt as I wear an elegant black dress that displays my curves but doesn’t expose too much skin, acknowledging the event and country.

We walk in together, soon dispersing when he generates good conversation with someone. I decide to grab myself a drink in hopes it’ll grow my confidence to meet someone new. As I ask the bartender for a drink I hear my name being called by a familiar voice, it belongs to none other than Paul Aron.

Paul had always been so kind and welcoming, making nearly everyone fall head over heels for him, me included. When we first met, his charm didn’t fail with me, and I had dreamt of what his lips would feel like. But now I’ve grown to know him and realised his charm, is him. So I had lost some of my feelings but he still never falls short to make me blush. “Hey Paul” I give him a soft smile and we exchange a short but comfortable hug. “It has been so long, hasn’t it? I missed your face.” He states and we both chuckle.

“Likewise. I’m surprised you recognise me.” The light hearted joke leaves my mouth freely.

“Oh I could never forget you, you’re too good.” I couldn’t distinguish if that comment was platonic or meant more, so I give him a kind smile and hope I don’t give off the wrong sign.

We carry on a relaxed conversation, frequently giggling and brushing hands. We both notice Ollie from across the room and when his eyes meet mine I give him my signature smile, before I watch his brows furrow as his eyes glance at my hand that sits millimetres away from Paul’s. He looks back up and Paul waves at him, in reply Ollie turns his head which encourages me to excuse myself and make my way to him.

He watches me as I get closer with each step, a questioning look on my face as I finally reach him. “What’s up?” I ask him softly and his reply of “nothing” forces me to grab his hand and drag him out of the room. I walk through the long hallway and find a door that hides a moonlight sunroom. I shut the door once both of our bodies stand under the stars and I stare at Ollie in silence, observing him. His deep eyes look into mine and a smirk curls on his lips. I tilt my head to the side and try to hide the smile that begs to curl on my lips.

“Would you like to tell me what’s wrong?”

“I already told you, nothing’s wrong.” He utters in his soft British accent.

“Oh, ok then. Well if nothing’s wrong then I’ll just go back to Paul.”

“No” He says immediately, one of his calloused hands grabs my arm. “Why?”

“Because, I don’t want you to go with him.” A sigh leaves my mouth and I try to keep calm, but also not wave away the problem because of the way he looks at me with that face or when he takes a step closer so both of his hands can brush against my skin.

“Why?” I ask him in a whisper, and he gives me the same answer, just like I had given him the same question. “Why do you think that you have control over who I talk to?”

“Because I know it’s not just going to be talking” He looks down at me and matches the sound of my voice. “Ok, maybe you’re right, but what’s so wrong with more than talking? Can’t I do what other people my age do? Or is it something with Paul?”

“No, there’s nothing wrong with Paul, but if you want to do “things that people your age do” don’t do it Paul.”

“Oh ok then, then tell me, who am I supposed to do it with Ollie?”

“You can’t possibly ask me this question like you seriously don’t know who would take care of you best and learn every part of you to make you satisfied. Did you notice what you do? Teasing me with those long hugs and short kisses on my cheek that you call “platonic” or whenever you cuddle me when we watch movies together and you’re the first person waiting for me when I finish a race. You can’t do all of that and then go after him. What has he done for you? What can he do? I bet he can’t touch you like I will, or if he kisses you. You know that I’m better, you would probably wish that it was me? Wouldn’t you?”

His face inches closer to mine and hands slide around my waist. My breath becomes uneven but I don’t lose eye contact with him. “What makes you so sure of that?” I breathe out, barely audible. “Let me prove it to you, let me show you how good you’ll feel. You won’t think of Paul again.”

One of his hands grab the back of my neck and pull my head toward his, our lips colliding and they instantly mould against the other like they were destined for each other. My hands wrap around his waist, pulling him closer to me before and feeling his warmth along my whole body. I stand on my tippy toes and intertwine my hands together behind his neck.

Ollie grips the back of my thighs and pulls me up so you can wrap your legs around his waist. We broke the kiss so I could lay open mouthed kisses on his neck and my desire for him grew every second that his hips would grind against mine. His umber eyes glistened and I couldn’t tell if the stars I saw in them were a reflection from the sky or a display of his delicacy.

He was always a masterpiece to look at, pigmented cheeks, a light shade of my favourite roses, a smile worth more than the moon and eyes that make you feel so many emotions of love. And oh don’t get me started on every other part of him, his voice, the one that hugs me, makes me feel so giddy even my knees buckle and go weak. Before I felt his touch I only wanted it but now, oh it’s a need.

He puts me back on my feet just to lower me to the ground, my back makes contact with the cold floor, and my eyes make contact with the moon and the stars. His body hovers over mine and he plants kisses along my skin as he leisurely moves lower and lower. Oh the feeling of his lips that kiss my insecurities and heal my scars, I just wish I could get every nanometer engraved and memorised on my lips and body and mind.

Ollie lifts my hips to pull the fabric of my dress up and then over my head. He places my body flat on the floor as he looks at me with parted lips and wonder melting in his eyes. “You’re so beautiful” He says in advance of his hands pulling my panties down and body inching closer and closer to mine. I watch him unbuckle his belt and pull down his pants.

“Ready to forget about Paul?” I was forming my response until he swiftly lifted my hips up and thrust into me. My breath immediately hitches and a short moan leaves my mouth as I grow comfortable to the stretch. His groan was like a melody to my ears, before he released a hushed curse and made another ram into me. Ollie readjusts my legs so they hang over his shoulders and he manages to get even deeper inside of me than before. My hips lightly grind against his, adding friction to my clit and whines emit from my mouth.

“Tell me, would Paul do this to you? Fuck you under the stars?” His words brought me to surprise, but it was a surprise that I would happily get used to, as long as it was him.

“N-no” I choke out my response as he drives in me at a consistent pace, fast and rough but tender and sensitive. His head lingers above mine until my hands tangle into his now tousled hair and pull him closer to me. Our lips fuse together in a powerful kiss, one where we share each other under the moonlight, finally. After months of pining and wishing to know what it feels like, I ultimately do, we both do.

A moan releases from my mouth into his as the knot in my stomach becomes tighter and tighter, just waiting for the last motion to make it snap. “You gonna cum?” He mumbles against my lips and suddenly all words leave my vocabulary, but moans come out pretty easily. My head nods up and down eagerly and he snaps his hips the last few times just enough to make me release with a loud whine. Ollie’s thrusts become less consistent and I feel him spasm inside of me before his cum fills me. He rides both of our highs out before halting deep inside of me. Our breathing soon matches and his head lowers beside mine, just enough so he can whisper in my ear.

“Do you think Pau-” We both chuckle as I quickly cut him off.

“No. Only you Ollie, only you.”

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changetyre · 15 days

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How long? II Lando Norris X Reader ⓈⒾ

SUMMARY: Finding your soulmate doesn't always include a happy ending.

WARNINGS: Angst Angst Angst with a sprinkle of fluff. Sickness, death.

A/N: This is a story I wrote a while ago for Wattpad and which I always loved but reading it back now there's been things I've wanted to adjust which is what I chose to do here ;)

Lando POV II

"Tell me about her," she asked me passing me back our photo.

I looked at it, my thumb grazing over her in the picture I kept in my wallet.

_____

Y/N POV II

Lando and I've been together ever since I can remember. We met when we were only toddlers and became inseparable ever since. We both knew in our hearts how much we meant to each other, we knew that we couldn't live without each other. However, another part of us, and everyone around us, told us there would come a point where we'd meet other people.

And we did meet other people, in fact when I went to college and Lando joined F1 we both decided to try to date others and it was the most miserable time in both our lives. Which only reinforced our feelings, we were irrevocably in love.

We were aware that we were a very cheesy couple, the kind of people who just didn't care when people were around us and loved to show our love for one another no matter the time and/or place. We were the kind of couple to gift each other little things and have dinner dates every week. Land never failed to bring me flowers every weekend since we started dating.

Life felt like a dream when we were around each other, we literally felt like we were in the clouds, floating in our own bubble of love. But it didn't take long before it burst.

Given the amount of time Lando and I had spent together we had discussed anything you could possibly imagine and despite some thinking this was a horrible and selfish thought, when Lando and I talked about losing one another, we always thought he would go first...simply because of his job.

What Lando didn't know though was that every night and every time Lando went on track I would pray, pray for his safety, pray for his health, pray that if one of us had to go...for it to be me...because I could simply not live a life without him...the single thought made me choke up.

'Be careful what you wish for.'

One year ago I was diagnosed with Breast cancer. For some reason the news didn't come to me as much of a shock as I thought, it was like something in my mind and body had expected this, had somehow mentally prepared me for it. On the other hand, I could tell how much this devastated Lando, so much he'd set his mind on quitting F1 to care for me which I had to practically force him not to.

We had caught it early on and I only needed a few weeks of chemotherapy. Luckily the news came at the end of Lando's season, he would be home and he wouldn't get distracted on track.

Chemo was worse than anyone had ever described to me, it felt like I'd been completely stripped away from my own body and I was miserable but I knew I had to get through it, I tried to keep a smile all the way through it, for Lando, but I knew he could see right through me and he had as many sleepless nights as I did through it all.

Finally the last week of Chemo, everything was better. Lando was certainly brighter than before although I could tell he was still worried, I could see it in his eyes. Every time I'd say I was tired, huff, breath abnormally, or complain about any sort of pain I could tell Lando's heart skipped a beat.

It annoyed me at first because he constantly hovered, but I never said anything and eventually, I understood. I knew that if I was in his shoes I'd be exactly the same and now I found myself wondering whether I'd wished for the right position to be in because even though I was in pain physically...Lando was in pain too, even more than I was...and it broke my heart to see him go through it.

Now I wanted the season to start more than ever so Lando could put his focus and worry somewhere else other than me, and even though I worried that he might have an accident because of all this distraction I knew how much he adored driving and it was what he needed.

The start of the season went well, not as good as we expected but it was good enough and the boys still had the rest of the season left.

I was with Lando in Monaco for the race, I was so excited about having him race here in Monaco since we'd recently bought our apartment here and we hadn't been able to enjoy it because of my treatments.

It seemed like things were finally getting back to normal, Lando and I were floating back up in the clouds again and we were finally finding our rhythm again...it was almost too good to be true.

I was home making dinner for Lando and me, he'd texted he was almost home and I'd decided to make some food for us. The whole day I'd noticed I was particularly exhausted and I kept running out of breath doing simple things. I had just set the table when all of a sudden it felt like my lungs had disappeared.

I dropped to the ground in pain gasping with all my power for some air. I thought I was going to die right there and then all until I heard the door open.

"Y/N!" I heard Lando's panicked scream. "LOVE!"

He pulled me up and turned me towards him, I clutched my chest. "I can't breathe." I wheezed.

"SOMEONE HELP ME!" He screamed out.

And eventually, for me, everything went black.

I woke up on an all too familiar surface. I was in a hospital bed, all sorts of tubes and needles attached to me. I looked for Lando and saw he was outside talking to the doctor, I could see him through the window.

Lando was facing my way while the doctor's back was towards me. I could tell it was a serious conversation and as much as I tried to deny it I knew what was happening. The cancer was back...and this time it wasn't going away.

I saw the anger and pain in Lando's eyes as the doctor spoke to him, he argued. I imagined he kept asking for a solution that simply didn't exist. Lando held his tears in all until he locked eyes with me. I gave him a look letting him know it was okay, I knew and that was enough for him to break down.

The doctor simply patted his shoulder before walking away. Lando walked to the room wiping his tears away as best as he could. Once he came in I could tell he didn't know what to say.

"It's back-" he spoke in barely above a whisper.

"I know baby." I opened my arms for him and he broke down in tears again. I cried with him, not because of my pain but because of his.

"How long?" I asked him after a few minutes.

Lando kept his head buried in my chest but I could feel him shaking his head.

"Baby how long?" I repeated the question.

His head finally rose up, his eyes were swollen and the tears just kept coming. "They're not sure, he says it could be 6 months or a week." Lando's voice broke at the last words before he buried his face in my chest once more except this time he wrapped his arms around me holding me tightly as if I could slip away at any second.

"I love you..." he wept "I'm so sorry." these last words shattered me.

"I'm sorry too...I love you." I whispered to him as I kissed the top of his head.

"Baby I'm scared-" he whispered into my chest.

I didn't exactly know how to comfort him, I let Lando cry it out as much as he needed to while I tried to remain strong, I found myself pondering over how I felt, I wasn't scared but I was in pain, and I was so miserable for leaving Lando like this, we definitely didn't have enough time together.

___

The next morning once Lando had come back into my room with a cup of coffee I decided it was time to talk about the next step. I knew deep down Lando still wanted to push for a cure that simply didn't exist but I also knew I didn't want to spend another second stuck in these hideous grey walls.

"Baby I want to get out here," I spoke. I was prepared for a discussion.

Lando simply looked down and gave a shaky sigh. "I know...and I'll get you out." his lip quivered and I could see tears brimming up in his eyes again.

"You're not going to ask me to stay?" I needed confirmation.

Lando got up and walked over to me, he scooted me over and sat down on the bed. "The day I met you-" he took a deep breath trying to keep himself together. "I made a promise to myself that I would do everything in my power to make you happy no matter what-" a tear slipped down his cheek. "I hope you know that if it was possible I'd take your place right now because seeing you like this..." another tear fell down his cheek. "it's been hell." I placed my hand on his cheek caressing it, I was crying too. "But I know you better than anyone and I know that you're not the kind of person to go out in a hospital room and I know you want to do as much as you can before you-" he stopped himself and his breath hitched. He couldn't say it.

"You're right." I quickly said not wanting him to finish because I could tell how hard it was for him. "I want to spend every second I have left with you, with the people I love, out of here." His lip quivered again as more tears left his eyes.

"Let's go then." Lando got back up starting to pack my things.

The news spread through the F1 world fairly quickly and I was flooded with pitiful messages all over my social media. Lando's friends from work who I'd grown close to didn't know what to say when I showed up in the paddock with them for the Monaco GP. Most of them simply gave me glances that spoke a thousand words.

Carlos, Alex, George, and Charles had all been incapable of holding their tears back as they saw me, giving me a hug that only existed for these situations.

After the Monaco GP, Lando and I found ourselves going to our favorite spots within Monaco, I was tired, so tired and I could feel death inching closer every day but I held on, I held on because...I knew he wasn't ready...I wasn't ready.

One morning I woke up to find Lando had planned a whole day for us and it all started at home. I'd walked to the living room to find Lando had prepared a very scrumptious breakfast. And he'd decorated our balcony with roses and candles.

We walked to it and there Lando got down on one knee, pulling out a small black box, which he opened to reveal a ring. My hands flew up to my mouth, I had always dreamed of this day but certainly not like this.

"My dearest y/n, I've imagined this very day over a thousand times in my head and I've come up with hundreds of speeches for this very occasion but it seems none of them would work for what we're going through now." His voice broke. "You have been the first and only woman in my life I have ever loved, you have been my best friend since day one, you've been my rock, my world, my everything and I simply do not want to spend another day not being able to call you my wife...so y/n, my love will you marry me?" I could tell he sped up the last bit to hold his tears back.

"Yes." I let him slip the ring on my finger before he rose up and we engulfed each other in a deep kiss.

"Propose...check" he pretended to hold a list and checked off the first point making me laugh.

"So what's next my fiancé," I asked him.

"Well, why don't we get going and I'll show you...my fiancé." he gave me another kiss.

Lando took me shopping for a bit before he drove us both back home. I'd noticed something else had been set up and once I walked into our room I found a wedding dress hanging in our closet. I gasped admiring the dress, it was simple but beautiful.

"Pietra helped me pick it out for you, we tried getting a more over-the-top one but apparently you can't just buy dresses like that overnight." he shrugged.

"It's beautiful." you admired the dress.

"Well you better get dressed, and I'll do the same. I'm going to get dressed somewhere else and when the time comes your driver will be here." he winked.

"Wait what?" I was confused.

"Just be ready in 2 hours...I love you." he gave me a quick peck on the lips before walking out. I got dressed and ready as best as I could with the time I had left, I did a simple hairstyle, partly because I was never good at doing my hair and partly because I barely had the strength to keep my arms up for longer than 3 seconds.

20 minutes before the 2 hours were up I heard a knock at the door. I opened it and Pietra, Alexandra, Lily, and Carmen were all standing there in matching dresses. You looked at them confused but on the brink of tears because of how beautiful they looked. "Did I die already?" I joked, and they laughed but I could tell the thought pained them.

"You look beautiful." P had to pat her eyes as she looked at me. I had naturally grown closest to her because of the brotherhood between Max and Lando.

"Thank you for doing this?" I had to hold my tears back too.

"Let's go." Alex and Lily extended their hands out for me and I took them walking out with them. We walked downstairs and Carlos was waiting in an Aston Martin DB6 Volante, that had been decorated with white flowers.

We arrive at the beach to find it prepared for a ceremony, all of Lando's friends from the paddock and his friends from Quadrant were there, as well as both our parents. I just about started crying there and then.

I got out of the car and Carlos stood there offering me his arm guiding me to one end of the carpet that had been rolled out. I saw Lando at the other end and tears quickly brimmed my eyes. As soon as he laid eyes on me it didn't take him half a second before he started crying too, Max Fewtrell quickly stepped in to hand him a handkerchief even though he was shedding a few tears too.

Without You by Harry Nilson started playing, and it was enough for me to let my tears run free. Carmen handed me a bouquet of roses and I began walking down the aisle, and for some reason, all my strength seemed to leave me right there and then.

I stumbled causing everyone to try to jump forward to grab me, My mom caught me, I could see the concern and the pain in her eyes but she also understood I needed to keep going. She wrapped her arm around my waist and helped me down the aisle.

And now it's only fair that I should let you know what you should know...I can't live, if living is without you...I can't live, I can't give anymore.

The song reached this part just as I reached him, he wrapped his arms around me, letting his forehead rest on mine.

"You look beautiful." he sniffled.

I placed my hand on his cheek before placing a gentle kiss to his forehead. "Let's get married," I whispered to him.

The ceremony was short, Lando had wanted to arrive at the vows quickly and once we did he pulled out a sheet of paper, a tear was already rolling down his cheek.

"My best friend, my rock, my first love, my only love, my life, my world, my everything, these words don't come remotely close to describing what you are to me. I hope you know I consider myself the luckiest man on earth to have met you, to have loved you, to have cared for you, and to have married you-" he chocked up. "But although I thought it was impossible...as much as I feel the luckiest man...I feel the unluckiest too." he looked up to meet my eyes completely distraught. "It's unfair the world is taking you away from me when our love story has only just begun, all the dreams, all the plans, all the promises I have yet to fulfill to you will stay here while you will go." he gulped down, he had a knot in his throat. "I will cherish, love, and protect you for the rest of the time we have left together, I will continue bringing you flowers every weekend, I'll wake you up with kisses in the morning, I'll make you smile and laugh every day, and most importantly I will, with all my power, do my best to keep you happy." he finished.

I leaned forward giving him a long kiss on the cheek, now it was my turn and since this was all unexpected I hadn't prepared anything but already had enough to say.

"My Lando...you have made me the happiest woman on earth since the day I met you. You are the most loyal, hardworking, loving, fun man I have ever known and I consider myself the luckiest woman on earth to have fallen in love with you. And the luckiest woman for you will be the first, last, and only man I will ever love." Lando's lips quivered as I said those words, a sob escaping his lips. "I will forever be sorry that we didn't get more time together, that I couldn't give you what we had so long hoped for, a life, kids, to grow old together." I cleared my throat having to compose myself. "I wish there was more I could do to keep you happy in the time I have left my darling, I can't promise you much, but I promise that I will love you with every fiber of my body and soul until my last breath." I ended.

We were pronounced husband and wife and Lando pulled me in for a long deep kiss, mixed with both our tears.

It was the most perfect day of my life, surrounded by so much love from our families and friends, surrounded by so much happiness. Once the moon was out and the tide started rising things started getting packed up but Lando and I decided to take a walk along the beach.

We walked in silence, simply appreciating and cherishing each other's company. Once we were nearing the end of the beach I had to speak about what was on my mind.

"Lando." I started.

"No." he immediately replied.

"Baby-" I was going to keep going.

"I know what you're going to say and you can't ask me that-" he spoke softly but I could hear the anger and hurt in his voice.

"Lando listen to me please-" I stopped making Lando turn to me. He looked down and he was crying silent tears. "After I'm gone I need you to promise me you will keep going no matter how hard or painful it is...I want you to give your career 1000% percent like you always have...and someday whenever you're ready I want you to find someone who will make you happy, who will take care of you, who you will fall in love with and start a family with-" I spoke clearly, this was a thought I'd head since the first time I'd found out I was sick.

"No, I can't." He replied sniffling.

"Yes you can and you will," I assured him.

"How will I ever love someone as I love you..." he locked eyes with me.

"I'm not asking you to love someone as you love me. But you will learn to love again, I just want you to promise you will not shut yourself out, you need to keep going...for me." I walked up to him, wrapping my arms around his neck, with one hand I wiped the tears from under his eyes.

He looked at me unsure and simply nodded, I knew he didn't mean it right now but it was as much reassurance as I would get from him for now.

"I'll never find anyone like you." He spoke once we'd started walking back.

"Maybe not, but you will find someone, there's plenty of women out there Lando, amazing, beautiful, incredibly talented women and I'm sure there's someone else for you." the mood had livened up a little bit.

____

LANDO POV II

The next morning I woke up...she didn't. She'd passed in her sleep, in my arms. A smile was still on her lips. I knew she was gone but I still tried to wake her, I still needed her to wake up.

I was inconsolable for months after her death, and my friends and my family had to help me back to my feet. Literally, because it was as though all my strength, all my will to live had died with her that day.

"She made me promise her that I would find someone else, that I'd fall in love again." I stifled a laugh remembering our walk at the beach.

"She sounds like an amazing woman." She commented. She had a very genuine smile.

"She was...I never met anyone like her." I sighed, that ache in my heart was still very present but bearable now.

_____________

Bonus A/N:

If it serves as any consolation I cried my eyes out writing this story. .

#f1 angst #angst #lando norris #lando norris x reader #lando norris angst #f1 x reader #changetyre #f1 imagine #f1 one shot #formula 1 #f1fic #f1

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krisluxxeeempress · 2 months

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HOW DOES YOUR PERSON FEEL ABOUT YOU? PICK-A-PILE

Pile (1): Privilege & Gifts

Cards: six of swords reversed, ten of wands reversed, Queen of wands, page of cups reversed, page of wands reversed with the two of swords at the bottom of the deck.

Your person is seeing you how you are seeing yourself, as THAT BISH. For many of you, you have experienced a glow up, as within and so without. There’s a reason I used yoga poses images for this reading. Yoga is an ancient and spiritual meditative practice and with that, I feel that this is a spiritual glow up within that is exuding most powerfully as without. It goes deeper than anything superficial. Your person feels like you are unattainable to them now. We all can agree that the best revenge is your paper, but you are proving that there’s levels to revenge. The great Lauryn Hill said something along the lines of “ how are you going to win if you aren’t right within”. Your revenge is getting right within. I must stop myself from referencing words of wisdom and lyrics from other spiritually awaken individuals though it’s a strong indication that a lot of you have evolved mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. Your glow is seen, and your high vibes are felt strongly by your person. It’s damn near blinding to them if I’m being honest. I usually have a lot to say, however, this time it’s different.

Energetically, it’s like everyone including your person who do not vibrate at the level you do now cannot access you energetically, physically or emotionally. Imagine being on a plane and you don’t have service. Imagine looking out the window and because you are high up in the sky, everything beneath you appears so small if not, nonexistent. Your energy is worth looking up to now, for all- including your person. This message was intended to be focused on how your person feels about you but energetically I am picking up on a multitude of people in which your person is blending into. Energetically, it’s like you are walking through crowds of people who are all trying to get your attention and access to you but fail because there’s just too many people around. Plus, you are protected by security. You have strong spiritual protection around you that is impossible for anyone to penetrate, including your person. If this is going on spiritually, which is as within, please believe this will manifest physically, as without. Something major is about to prosper for those who chose this pile. I almost want to apologize to those who chose this pile who don’t really resonate with spirituality but then again, for those this resonates with, that’s like apologizing for who you’ve become and or are becoming. I wanted more clarity on the Queen of Wands card and the Seven of Wands came out to clarify. ( I type as the cards come out for those wondering) The seven of wands further confirms what I was picking up about having spiritual protection around you that will manifest, in reality.

The nine of pentacles have appeared with Judgement reversed, eight of swords, four of cups and finally The Empress. The nine of pentacles is my “ RICH BISH” card and with Judgement reversed, I interpret this as “ you can’t sit with me” vibes. It’s goes beyond your person at this point. For anyone who hurt, betrayed, abandoned or refused to see that you were the diamond in the rough are now finding themselves mentally stuck and transfixed on you THE EMPRESS. ( not gender specific) You will be attracting many men/ women that want to bathe in your light, success, growth and protection but they will be blocked somehow, someway. You won’t even be aware of it. This may be what is happening energetically as I type this reading because if you recall, I mentioned above how it’s like your person is blending in with others making it hard to really pick up on their energy. Your person may become a distant memory soon. They will no longer be able to pull on your energy let alone access you physically. What a sad day/ future for them. Pulling from my self-created “ why are they mad” oracle deck, the first card out is- they are mad because they cannot ride your wave. SEE ! They are also mad because you will not go 50/50 with them( SHERA7 vibes, if you know you know) To explain that card, there’s a very successful and well-known women on YouTube who goes by that name. She teaches women specifically how to attract wealthy/ “ high value” men. She calls men DUSTIES if they do not provide financially 100% amongst other things.

Anyway, I interpret this card as confirmation that you no longer think or accept breadcrumbs from anyone including your person. ( I don’t think this is your person anymore but for the sake of the reading, I will continue to call them such) Your person is also mad that they are not the only ones trying to be your only one. It’s funny how people suddenly want you when they discover others want you. But for you, this will be on another level of others wanting you. Everything about your energy and soon to be life is on another level. I am getting significant Sagittarius, Leo, Capricorn, Cancer, Libra, Taurus, Virgo and Aquarius energy from this pile. (or 9th, 5th, 10th, 4th, 7th, 2nd, 6th, 11th houses) Lastly, Privileged Lady and Gift card came out.

I OFFER PERSONAL WRITTEN READINGS $20.00

EMAIL: [email protected]

Pile (2): I Spy

Cards: King of Swords, four of pentacles reversed, fool, death reversed, magician reversed and at the bottom of the deck the six of wands reversed.

Your person feels like you’ve beat all odds in some way. It’s like they witnessed you going through trial and tribulations and now you’ve emerged into a beautiful/ handsome butterfly. Your person is someone new though they’ve been watching you for some time. They have strong Aquarius, Leo, Capricorn placements and in some way, they’ve witnessed you mature. I wouldn’t be surprised if Pile (1) resonated with some of you who chose this pile.

Anyway, your person may be significantly older than you as well.( no judgements or shade) Nevertheless, your person views you as the fool card – young spirited, bold, confident, happy, authentic, honest , funny and quirky, and restless. (someone has ADHD- I’m struggling to focus on this reading ) They also view you as their 10 of cups and Empress. The King of Swords indicates that your person is intelligent and sees you very clearly. He/ She also feels like you would see them clearly, meaning his/her status, money, popularity or success wouldn’t be what solely attracts you. They know you wouldn’t use or take advantage of them and for that reason alone, they want to provide and give you everything you need and desire.

Damn, the Star card just came out with the three of swords reversed, the devil reversed and the seven of pentacles. When I tell you your person has been watching and observing you for some time- I lie to you not. They’ve watched you ( kept tabs on you) while you may have been going through hard times, loss, addictions, battling negative energies including people. They’ve watched you heal yourself from heartbreak, disappointment- the list is endless. Your person has been studying you. For some you may feel like this is creepy but it’s not, I promise. Your person may know of you from work, school, church, the gym, social media etc. Though I highly believe they’ve been watching from social media. Regardless, your person is new and or someone that you vaguely know.

The energy I’m getting from this pile is extremely charged up and it’s hard for me to sit still to finish this reading. It’s electric. ( you may be seeing 4444, 9999 and 1010 everywhere and butterflies) Someone in this pile may be a heavy coffee, energy drinker. This reading felt all over the place but in an organized chaos kind of way. The two of you together are electric to say the least.

I OFFER PERSONAL WRITTEN READINGS $20.00

EMAIL: [email protected]

Pile (3) Someone You Used to Know

Cards: five of pentacles reversed, six of cups reversed, hanged man reversed, temperance reversed, six of swords reversed and at the bottom of the deck the seven of wands reversed.

LIKE DAMN!

This is not “ YOUR PERSON” ANYMORE. The way these cards and energy are set up, I am picking up on SOMEBODY THAT YOU USED TO KNOW ( Gotye Vibes) I literally had to put the song on to listen to the lyrics, really quick. Whoever this used to be to you is mad that your cut off game is too strong and that you don’t make time for them. This is someone who thrived on you depending on them and expressing this dependence in a clingy manner. Some of you may have wanted a higher level of commitment from them and they refused to give that to you.

Others of you may have miscarried a baby ( I’m sorry ) because they were stressing you out etc. For some, they allowed their parents/ family to interfere with your relationship. Then there’s the group who were cheated on and or breadcrumbed. This person never took you out on dates or invested money in you. They always had an excuse/ lie as to where their money was going, making it clear you were not a priority. This person is always working, which also means they never had time for you either. I also see that this person may have been married or in a long-term relationship prior to you and they haven’t gotten over it.

They made you suffer for their past relationships failure etc. The cards keep flying out, but I think we can all agree that whoever this person is, you are no longer in their life. If you chose this pile, you may also resonate with Pile (1). Whoever this distant person is, they are mad you make life look effortless. Healing and moving on from them appears effortless. They are also mad that you can afford designer, meaning your financial status has improved. Lastly, they are mad you left them on read. Imagine receiving one last message from someone before they pass away. They will never respond- no matter what. I know that sounds extreme, but you feel dead to them. Whatever message you last sent or vice vera, is all they have, to prove you are somebody they used to know.

I OFFER PERSONAL WRITTEN READINGS $20.00

PLEASE EMAIL ME: [email protected]

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING! IF ANY OF THESE PILES RESONATED PLEASE CONSIDER "HEARTING" OR REBLOGGING MY POST. I AM TRYING TO BUILD AND EXPAND MY BLOG AND I NEED YOUR HELP TO DO SO.

#predictions #pick a card #love messages #love tarot reading #krisluxxeeempress #lovers #romantic couple #romance #love letters #personal readings #tarot blog #tarot tumblr #tarot cards #3 piles

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alpaca-clouds · 2 months

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You Cannot Create A Solarpunk Future Under Capitalism

I am feeling like a broken record, but I just need to make this clear once more: No, Solarpunk in any form is not possible under capitalism. If you think it is, you either fail to understand Solarpunk, or you don't get what capitalism even means.

Technically I wrote about this already almost exactly a year ago. Let me reiterate it again, though: Solarpunk at its core is build around a couple of ideas. Those are:

Living in relative harmony with our environment, rather than destroying it. (Which includes using renewable energies.)

Decolonialism.

Social justice and the same rights, chances and possibilities for all people.

Neither of those three points is archievable under capitalism, as the end goals of capitalism are opposed to each of them.

Let me go through each of them.

Environmental Sustainability is not archievable under capitalism.

This is the point people tend to argue about the most. Because they will go: "But if the renewable energy sources are cheaper than fossil fuels, the capitalist will see more possibilities to make money with it." Well, do I have news for you: A variety of renewable sources, such as solar and wind power, are already a lot cheaper than fossil fuels and yet somehow the capitalist argue against using them. Care to explain that? No? Well, I'll do it for you. (Technically already did in that blog last year.)

See, when someone's net worth is listed somewhere, most of them actually do not have billions of dollars on their bank accounts. And no, they also do not swim in gold coins. Instead their net worth comes from calculating how much money they would be able to make if they sold all thier assets. A lot of those assets are shares in companies they have, as well as stuff like their fancy houses, fancy cars, fancy private jets and fancy yachts. Most billionaires have not more than a couple tens million dollars in liquid money, meaning money they can just spend. If they wanna buy something that is more expensive, they will usually go to a bank, say: "Look at all the stuff I have. I wanna buy myself more stuff. Gimme money?" And the bank will go: "Of course, Sir Billionaire, here you go. Have a nice 10 billion dollars."

And this is where the issue arrises: Most of the billionaires who are investing in the energy market, have already invested billions in fossil fuels. Be it by owning shares of fossil fuel companies, or by owning mines, oil rigs, power plants and the like. And this puts them into a silly little position: Even if they wanted to make more money through renewables, they cannot without harming themselves. Because in the moment that renewables become even more viable than they already are, fossil fuels lose their viabilities - and hence all the assets they hold in fossil fuels lose their value in an instant. The billionairs know that. The banks know it, too. Which is why banks do not want to give the fossil fuel billionaires money for that, even if they ask.

And that is only on the energy-generating side of it. If you go into the other stuff that harms our environment... Simply put: Public transport will never make as much money, as selling everyone their own car. And plastics are just so much cheaper than any alternatives. And the companies need fast fashion, because they won't make as much money, if folks only go buying new clothes every ten years.

Capitalism is build on the exploitation of the environment.

You cannot archieve decolonialization under capitalism.

Let's talk about the call to decolonize next. This is even easier explained: Capitalism is build on colonialism. And contrary to what you might have been told in school, colonialism has never ended. Most indigenous folks never got their ancestral land back - or have to fight to remain on it to this day. The most notable examples you know off might be indigenous people on their land (at times the land they originally had been forced onto after their ancestral land had been stolen from them) fighting pipelines that the capitalists want to put onto that land. That is colonialism.

In fact a lot of the raw material we use to power capitalism is produced on stolen land or is moved across stolen land to be financially viable. Be it oil springs, that can be found there. Or be it mines. That is both mines that produce coal, but also mines that are used to produce lithium and other materials used in batteries of electric cars. These raw materials should technically belong to the indigenous people from whose land those materials are sourced. And we do know for a fact that some of them will prefer to leave those materials in the ground. Maybe because of the harm to the environment that mining for them creates. Maybe because the land is sacred to them. Maybe because some of them just do not care about cheap electric cars.

It is more than that, of course. Because colonialism also allows for slave labor. And yes, I mean slave labor. Like classical slave labor where people are pressganged into laboring in those mines, or in other factories, where they are not paid at all - or are paid in breadcrums. The reason that the global south is so abhorently poor, even though most of the raw materials powering our world are found there, is, that the people in the global south are exploited, while the land is often owned by people from the global north, who either got it through colonialism - or by buying it from someone who got it through colonialism.

And once again: The profit motive of capitalism is directly opposed to decolonizing - and because of that it won't happen. Capitalism is built on colonial exploitation.

You cannot archive social justice under capitalism.

Capitalism as a system was invented for one reason and one reason alone: To allow former nobility, who were close to lose their power and influence in a Europe of anti-royal revolutions, to hold onto the power and influence and veil it underneath the idea of meritocracy. Basically saying: "Everyone gets what they deserve based on the work they got in." Obviosly they got the most, because they owned the land that everyone was working and living on. And then they did their best to brainwash everyone into believing this - at which they actually succeeded.

Here is the thing: Capitalism needs an underclass to exploit. Sure, a good chunk of that exploitation will happen in other countries, where the poor white middleclass folks do not need to see them toil, but some of that exploitation simply cannot be done in those other countries. At times because the work physically needs to happen in the western nations - stuff like road contruction, general contruction work, cleaning and such are an example of this. And at times because some things might be time critical, cannot be transported that far and stuff like that - like farm work in some cases, or also all the Amazon warehouse stuff. Oh, and all those fastfood jobs belong into this area. Stuff that is paid minimum wage and exploited to no end.

And then there is of course prison labor in the US, which once again is just slavery.

And all of that does not even go into the care and nursing work that is either underpaid by a ton when it is happening on the open market (like in hospitals, schools, kindergardens and other care facilities) - or is happening completely for free. Mosten done by women, who will care for both children, as well as elders and disabled family members for free.

The true endgoal of capitalism is to turn the labor of the lower classes into money and value for the upper class to hoard like bloody dragons. As such capitalism will never be compatible with any sort of equal rights and equal chances.

Those three aspects are truths that just cannot be changed. Capitalism will never be able to create any sort of justice, equal rights, or sustainability. It is not in the interest of capitalism to do so, either.

#anti capitalism #anarchism #solarpunk #lunarpunk #cyberpunk #late stage capitalism #fuck capitalism #socialism #communism #decolonization #sustainability #land back #indigenous rights #anti prison

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thebenjiblackwoodexpress · 3 months

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The Blackwood Knight prt.3

Disclaimer: Anonymous sister entering the scene with another offering.

Description: In which the Blackwood Knight comforts his lady.

Part 1 Part 2

Warnings: I write Y/N as female because I wrote this for my sister, but please feel free to imagine them however you would like. I want everyone to feel included. I don't think there's anything else.

The young Blackwood heir did not encounter his lady again the next day, nor the next, though he waited for many an hour under the Brackentree, even as the darkness that began to sweep across the land seemed to reflect the sorrow growing in his own heart.

Perhaps she was too frightened to return to their meeting point, he cursed himself. Worse, perhaps she feared him, associating him with the craven bannermen who had assailed her and who bore the colours of his own House. Fears that she would never consent to meet with him again, even if it were only to let him apologise on behalf of his House and for not being there in the first place to protect her, tormented him as the dawn rose on the third day of her absence from their haunt. He began to grow desperate: to hear her voice, her laugh, just to see her smile, or even chastise him. Sinking to the floor at the base of the tree, he held his head in his hands. So tortured by his thoughts was he that he failed to hear approaching footsteps making their way towards him, before finally stopping in front of him. Hearing the rustle of silk against silk as she stopped in front of his boots, he looked up incredulous to see the object of all his hopes and fears stood before him, looking down on him with a downcast, timid expression. Stumbling in his haste to rise from his seated position, he rose to meet her gaze.

Bending his head respectfully towards her, he half sighed, half stuttered, ‘my lady,’ she little knowing the true import of the term of address for him.

“I feared you were unwell, or perhaps…afraid of the Blackwood lands, of bannermen…of me.” He winced once again at the painful thought.

Wringing her hands, she met his gaze, to his surprise, almost apologetically, before answering.

“I am sorry to be the cause of such concern. Thank you for thinking of me. I must confess to being afraid,” she began, causing him to lower his head in dejection at the confirmation of his worst fears that her words held.

Seeing the sorrow on his face, she quickly continued, “I was afraid you would think me weak and silly for how I behaved when I encountered those men.” Looking in the opposite direction to avoid his gaze, once again, she seemed to be struggling to find the right words.

“I was surprised by the event and acted in a manner unbecoming, and I am sorry for it. I won’t…impose on you again. I just came to wish you good bye and for the Light of the Seven to guide you.”

Beginning to turn from him, Y/N almost stumbled when a hand reached out to lightly hold her waist, arresting her motion. Her head snapping up in surprise, she met the resolute, yet soft gaze of Benjicot, before he began to speak.

“I thought you were afraid of me. That that was the reason for your absence. I nearly lost all restraint and considered storming Brackenhall to see you. I am relieved to hear that you are not afraid of me,” he began, as he took a step closer to her, his hand rising to tentatively hold the left side of her face, giving her time to reject the movement, should she wish.

When she did not move, or seem to dislike their proximity, he took another step closer so that they were standing chest to chest, his arm encircling her waist, whilst he held her head, preventing her from turning her gaze downwards.

“I never imagined that the reason for your absence could be that you were embarrassed, and I’m sorry for not thinking of it before. I greatly reproach myself for allowing you to feel that you acted in a manner that would warrant such a feeling.”

At this, she tried to turn her head away from him again, but he held her head gently, but firmly in place, preventing her from doing so.

“You have no cause of embarrassment in your conduct. You were very brave, braver than I may have been had I been accosted in a like manner by a group of your bannermen,” he smirked, dimpling his cheek, causing her to smile just a little.

Encouraged by her reaction, and her seeming to relax in his arms, he continued:

“I only wish I had arrived earlier to prevent you from being accosted. Please believe me when I say that I will make it my purpose to ensure that you never come to such harm again. I offer you my sword and my blood in protection of yours.”

At this she smiled teasingly.

“Well, I don’t have any sword to speak of, but I will gladly accept the service of yours in my protection.”

His smile widening at her teasing tone, he stepped two paces back from her before drawing his sword and holding it before her in both hands, as he had done the second time they had met, when he had sworn his fealty to her as her knight.

“Would you like to try it,” he asked, restraining a laugh at her confused expression.

“I’m not sure…”

“I’m not suggesting you run me through, before you get any ideas” he winked, “but I can show you how to use it.”

Tentatively brushing the handle of the sword, before grasping it in her delicate hand, she attempted to raise it, somewhat hindered by the weight of it. Anticipating this, Benjicot turned her so that she was positioned in front of him, the sword raised lightly in her right hand, her grip becoming more steady as his own hand helped her to hold the weight. Reaching his left hand around her shoulder to secure it around the other side of the sword hilt, he raised the sword and her arm with his, in slow arcs through the air, demonstrating the first positions of swordsmanship he had learned as a young boy. Placing his head lightly on her shoulder, he stole a glance at her expression and was rejoiced to see a pink dusting her cheeks.

She spoke up in a quiet voice, almost in a whisper, "it would be nice to be able to wield a sword as you do, and not fear the world as much."

"You don't need to fear anything," He spoke lowly into her ear. "Not when you are with me to protect you."

He began to hope, if only briefly, that there may come a day, after all, when she would reciprocate what he now recognised to be his own love for her, and that she may consent to be his lady, as well as his Lady.

With this thought to bolster his courage, he removed the sword from her right hand, securing it in his before taking her right hand in his left and raising their arms above their heads. With her hand still raised aloft in his, he spun her towards him so she was, once again, enclosed within the circle of his arm, her dress brushing against his tunic.

Me randomly popping on to end my anonymous era and emerge from my Damon-esque murder cloak. I'm so glad that people are enjoying this story, thank you so much for all your replies, it's very kind. My sister and I were taken by the HOD twinks, as many were he he, and decided to write stories for the character the other liked. She's writing an absolute masterpiece of a story for my wee pretty Bracken boy. This story was meant for her, as she loves Benjicot, but I'm so pleased that others are enjoying it too. More to come :).

@lady-callisto @twistytimesandthoughts @abookloverlawyerfan-blog @mymoonempress

@lovebabe18 @poppyflower-22 @ithilwen-blackwood @spinachtz

#house of the dragon #house of the dragon x reader #benjicot blackwood #benjicot blackwood x reader #house blackwood #davos blackwood

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imagine--if · 11 months

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hey! i hope your doing well, i would love to see anything fluffy for mike (headcanons, blurbs, whatever you feel like suits it most!) - he deserves the whole world and sm more to me 😭

A/N: I get youuuu, hope you enjoy 😁 started off with the relationship hcs but let me know if you wanna see anything more specific!!

Warnings: FNAF movie spoilers, mentions of violence

⋆✮ Dating Mike Schmidt Includes: ✮⋆

➳ Mike's been through a hell of a lot ever since his little brother got kidnapped, so I'm seeing major protectiveness and sometimes even clinginess involved from him when you end up dating because 😭 guy's been through stuff and he's not letting anyone else he's close to get hurt

➳ To be honest, at first he's pretty closed-off with people, vulnerable with a tough exterior, so if you meet him in some scenario where you're tied up with the Freddy's murders and job, he'll try to be distant and professional and all... ending up failing 🙃

➳ Eventually you start. talking more about personal things, hobbies your lives, and he'll mention his sister Abby and having to take the job because he needs the money and is in the middle of the custody situation with his sister. He's got a lot going on and the trauma of what happened all those years ago still wringing at his guilt, so being able to talk with someone who doesn't judge in a relaxed place is a nice change for him having to be on guard all the time.

➳ When Mike befriends you, which is what happens first, he's got your back. If you need someone to vent to or hang out with or whatever, he'll do whatever he can to help, and when it comes to you being in a sticky situation or someone trying to hurt you or play you, he always seems to realise and is in no way afraid of confrontation to get them to back off.

➳ Like if William tries sizing you up a bit... and Mike gets annoyed with that cool, defensive glare as he asks if he needs anything (I've got to make an imagine of this nowwww). I think Mike would only realise that he's actually jealous if you teased about it, or if he really loses his temper with someone that's not leaving you alone or something. Then it really nags at him and makes him think about actually liking you as more than a friend, and then that initial reluctance because everyone he gets close to seems to have something bad happen to them, like it's a curse. At the end of the day, he just wants you to be safe.

➳ It would take something big for Mike to confess to you, unless you take the first step (aka Abby begging you to tell him you like him too because she's getting bored of him not concentrating on what she's talking to him about or the conversation somehow curving to you and the stuff you're into). Maybe you're attacked at Freddy's and you're all in on the crisis together when Mike stands firmly in front of you when William reveals himself, or he shoves you out the way so you won't get hurt, ultimately jumping in front of the threat without a worry of him getting hit instead. It's then that he realises how much he needs you in his life, how he needs you alive because you add some joy to it that he hasn't felt in all these years, a change from the darkness that his head's stuck in.

➳ It all comes out of him in a rush as he looks you up and down with wild eyes and a firm grip, asking if you're alright and saying in a rush that "you're one of the most important people in the world to me, and I don't know what I'd do if you got hurt... I- I couldn't live with myself, okay?!"

➳ Okayyy Mike, just kiss them 😏

➳ After you fight Afton together and get Vanessa looked after, you can finally breathe and properly start dating, which includes that familiar protectiveness and slight clinginess... and also being best friends with his little sister, which you 100% would be. You'd spend time drawing or chatting or playing random games while Mike was out working, eliminating the need for a babysitter because you're the perfect fit and get along with her great. And when he is home, you do a lot of stuff together, like a mini family, and there's finally that security and stability in that life she needed.

➳ I feel like Abby would find it hilarious to tell you all the sappy things Mike says about you on the rare occasions where you're not around, ending in Mike's cheeks flushing beet red and him picking her up and whirling her around playfully until she's in fits of laughter. "I heard Mike say that he found another reason to keep going when he realised he was in love wi- hey!!"

➳ Mike would be a bit clingy, again because of what happened with Garret; Mike being distracted for one moment and then blaming himself for the rest of his life because it was that moment where his brother was taken and killed. So if you are out, on a date or just around, this guy will not leave your side. He's the kind of person to text you again and again if you don't respond to the first message, and it's kind of cute how much he worries, but then he doesn't need to, and every now and then he'll need your reassurance that you guys are safe and that you won't leave him, which stills ends with him burying his face in your neck for a long tight hug for a while.

➳ MIKE'S A BIG HUGGER. CHANGE MY MIND.

➳ Whether you're watching a movie with him and Abby, or you're out on a date or sleeping or whatever, Mike will always have some contact with you if you've told him you're okay with it: fingers linked under the table, pressed into his side while you're watching TV (with an affectionate forehead kiss every five minutes 🥺) or being half crushed to death while you're trying to sleep when he rolls onto you and traps you under his leg... good luck if you need to go to the bathroom. Chances are he'll end up trailing after you with mumbled protests.

➳ That protectiveness always kicks in when someone looks at you for too long, or in a way that he doesn't like the look of, or if you're obviously uncomfortable with. If you're quick, you can just convince him to walk away and you two go somewhere else, because Mike will end up getting annoyed and giving the guy a line to get him to make them go away. If he's not careful, he might end up getting in a fight again, but he'll really try not to when you tell him off for it and promise him that things are okay and you're not going anywhere.

➳ You and Abby are basically Mike's world, after all that's happened, there are only really two people left that he truly cares for and would do anything for. Once you're in a relationship with him, he'll do everything he can to make sure you're safe and won't have to go through anything he had to. If ever you're upset, he'll listen for hours with no judgement and major support, whatever mood you're in somehow rubbing off on him. Mike will admit his feelings in a rush, and when he does, he's not afraid to tell you that he loves you whenever you need to hear it, or whenever he wants to say it and wants you to be reminded. It's something that you can never doubt.

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sansaorgana · 1 month

Text

— THE PROPHECY

PAIRING — Na-Baron Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x fem!Fremen!Reader

SUMMARY — After failing to protect your tribe, its members leave you behind to die according to your customs. When Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen finds you, he immediately knows you are a daughter of the desert that was promised to him in the prophecy. Just like you were promised a man from the stars to come for you.

REQUEST — (1)

AUTHOR’S NOTE — I changed the request a little and I hope it's fine – I just had this idea and I really wanted to write it but the request itself inspired it! 💛 By the way, this request was sent in April... 🙈 I am so ashamed of myself and it's not even the only request like that because I still have one left to write with Feyd... Please, do forgive me... 🙏🏻 I know nothing about Fremen customs and I didn't bother to Google them because I had this idea in my head and I liked it so I didn't want to change it either way. Therefore, keep in mind that I treat The Fremen culture pretty loosely here. Reader is a Princess (I don't think they have royalty at all in canon), she has ritual tattoos on her body (not as many as Lady Jessica but still) and she has blue eyes from the spice (which is not even mentioned I think 🤔) but other than that I did not describe anything about her looks.

WARNINGS — mentions of slavery, mentions of sexual activities including non/dub-con (no actual smut), mentions of suicide, Reader gets beaten up badly in the beginning by The Harkonnen soldiers

WORD COUNT — 4,200

ENGLISH IS MY SECOND LANGUAGE.

THE PROPHECY

In other worlds, noble families had all the possible privileges alongside the burden of responsibilities. In other worlds, Princesses were spoiled and insufferable creatures who had all their whims and wishes fulfilled. But it was no other world – it was a cruel and harsh Arrakis. It was a hot desert filled with nothing but sand and spice and your tribe expected that your parents would help them to survive – no matter what price.

Everyone had the same duty to keep the rest alive – your father, your mother and even you, a simple Princess. The Fremen were not rich, therefore you were wearing the same clothes as everyone else. But even if you tried to blend in with the crowd, everyone would recognise you because of the ritual tattoos covering your skin. The noble blood was nothing but poison running through your veins – it was unwanted. Every failure was blamed upon you and you would drink the collected water as the last because your job was to make sure your tribe would live.

You had lost your mother first, even before the new Harkonnen invasion and the oppression of The Atreides. But your father died recently, in the very same ruins where your tribe left you to die in the ashes and heat before they attempted to run away. You were their Princess and your family had failed to protect them – the tough custom was to leave you behind and let the desert take care of you. It would either swallow you whole or you would prove yourself by digging yourself out.

But in this case – it was leaving you behind for The Harkonnens to find you and take care of you. It was worse than death in the desert. Perhaps their ways of murder were quicker and more sophisticated but they were unnatural. You were a Fremen and if you were to die, you wanted to do it by slowly decaying in the sand.

“Mercy… Mercy…” You begged quietly in Chakobsa language when they found out that the body laying amongst the ruins was still alive and breathing.

One of the Harkonnen soldiers pulled you up by your hair and you could see them all through hazy eyes, in their black uniforms covering their unhealthy pale white skin.

“That bitch is alive,” one of them drawled out. “Are you going to talk?” He leaned in to ask you but you didn’t answer. You had no physical strength to answer him but also no spiritual motivation to keep going.

You were already prepared to die and you felt so indifferent that their punches and kicks did not bring you any pain at all. They dragged you by your hair and bruised your skin, they threatened you and cut you in a few places but with each drop of blood, you also felt your life leaking out of your body and what a sweet relief it was.

You were lying curled up on the ground and completely lost track of time. You could have been there for centuries, long hours or mere minutes only. You had absolutely no idea. You only waited for death to finally release you from this life and from the endless sands of Arrakis.

Your dream was to fly – fly away and see other worlds. See the worlds with greenery and water. To breathe in the fresh air and to be invisible in the crowd, to no longer be a Princess.

Or to simply disappear. That option was not so bad either. Everything was better than this life, certainly.

For now, they left you alone and proceeded to ruin the temple around you. And some part of you grieved this loss of your culture but the other part had no love for it anymore because you couldn’t care less at this point and because this world and these people had brought you nothing but pain and oppression. You loved and hated the Fremen equally.

Perhaps The Harkonnens had left you alone to regenerate before they’d start kicking and beating you again. Perhaps they would let you die in peace – that was doubtful, though. Perhaps they thought you were already dead but you were sure they did not because they were very committed to their art of killing.

When you heard heavy steps approaching you and their muffled voices explaining something to the man who had just arrived, you realised that they had been simply waiting for someone more important. And he was probably the one who would bring death to you. You tried to open your eyelids at least a little to see the face of your killer as you prayed quietly for a painless death even though you knew very well that no gods were listening to you. No gods would listen in a destroyed temple anyway.

The gods were angry and their anger was always aimed at people like you – the noble Fremen who hadn’t managed to keep their people safe. You were doomed in this life and in the afterlife. There was no escape.

The man who had just walked inside the cave in which you were lying had an intriguing face because he was quite handsome for a Harkonnen. He had to be someone important, too, because his clothes were more elegant. He even had a cape attached to his stillsuit.

“Spy. Left behind,” one of his soldiers informed him and the man finally looked down and spotted you.

You bravely kept looking at him even though you knew already that painless death would be no option from his hands. You even straightened yourself up, slowly and gritting your teeth because you didn’t want to hiss out of pain and give them any satisfaction. Now, you were on your knees.

“No trace of the others,” the soldier explained.

“They’ve gone South to hide in the storms,” the new man commented and his voice made a shiver go down your spine and formed a knot in your stomach. There was something extremely eerie about him in a way that no ordinary Harkonnen could match. He was evil and twisted – even his voice was.

He was given a blade and he examined it as you were examining him, trying to figure him out even though it was pointless since it was the last minute of your life, most likely. Yet, stupid human brain always had to be kept entertained, always needed a distraction – even in a time like this.

“Send this message to The Baron,” the man commanded. “The North is liberated and secure. Harvest spice at will,” he looked back at you as if he was trying to mock you or tease you – so unaware how much you simply did not care anymore.

If it was up to you, you would blow up the whole planet. You would wipe Arrakis out of every galactic map.

“Yes, Na-Baron,” the man behind him bowed his head and then you realised that the demon in front of you was Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen himself.

It was quite ironic – he was of noble blood, too. Perhaps it would be an honour to be killed by him if you were a simple girl but you were not. Maybe it was a small mercy of the gods – a small, ironic smile. Yes, they would bring death now but at least your murderer was your equal and not a common Harkonnen scum.

Feyd-Rautha approached you slowly, clenching his jaw and your own sore muscles tensed, expecting another kick or a blow or things much, much worse. You just kept sitting there and looking up at him, too weak to even beg for mercy anymore.

And you didn’t want to either.

“She won’t talk,” another soldier of his told him and Feyd-Rautha tilted his head.

After a short while of silence, he crouched down in front of you and he tore a part of your stillsuit off of your body, revealing your arm and one side of your chest. You made no attempt to hide away from him or to yell for him to stop because you knew it would not help you in any way and it would only cost you even more of your dignity.

He smirked at the sight of your exposed body and stood up again.

“She is their Princess,” he pointed out loud. “Her marks give her away,” he added. “She is no spy. She was left to die as a punishment of her tribe.”

You were surprised how much he knew about your customs. Feyd-Rautha turned around to look at you again.

“I do not care about the Fremen traditions,” he informed you. “You will go with me,” he ordered.

You were too weak to move, of course. When two of his soldiers forced you to move up as they dragged you by your hair, you fell down on the ground. They kept forcing you up again and again, until you completely lost consciousness.

A man from the stars.

You were a young girl again or perhaps you were a visitor in your old memory because you could see yourself sitting there, inside the dark cave deep under the temple with a Reverend Mother and a few other veiled Bene Gesserit women. A young girl with tears still in the corners of her eyes from the painful ritual of marking her body with the black ink. She had just become a Princess and she already knew it was a path of pain and sacrifice. Now, she had been tested with Gom Jabbar – another suffering filling this small body of a little girl. She hadn’t asked for any of this.

“A man from the stars,” the Reverend Mother said to her. A prophecy.

“What about him?” The girl asked, wiping her tears away with the palm of her hand, forgetting that they were sensitive now. The tears burnt her freshly-inked skin and she hissed. Bene Gesserit women smiled contemptuously. It was the Princess’ punishment for shedding tears and wasting water.

“He will come for you,” The Reverend Mother found her eyes through all the chains in her veil. Little girl felt a chill going down her spine at those words and she was not sure whether it was a promise or a threat.

She never told her parents about this prophecy and soon she forgot about it anyway. She grew up to be too big to believe in fairytales.

When you opened your eyes again, you gasped and sat up rapidly as the water splashed all around you. You looked down, terrified, and realised that you were naked inside a bathtub, surrounded by a few terrified maids who had moved away at the sight of you awakening.

“Wh-what is happening?” You asked them. Some of them were clearly Harkonnen with their white skin, big black eyes and bald heads. Some of them were Fremen slaves but they were not from your tribe because you couldn’t recognise any of them.

“Na-Baron asked us to clean you up and take care of your wounds, my Lady,” the Harkonnen maid informed you. She was not sure how to address you but you couldn’t care less about that. What shocked you the most was…

“Water!” You yelped and tried to get out of the bathtub although you were too weak to do so. “You are wasting water!”

“We have more than enough water here in the palace,” the Fremen slave woman told you and you calmed yourself down although you couldn’t help but feel angry about the injustice.

Of course they had water in the Arrakeen’s palace. The Harkonnens, The Atreides… People like them never suffered – even in a place like this.

You allowed the maids to go back to cleaning you up. When you were as fresh as never before, you couldn’t recognise yourself in the mirror. Even your skin looked a shade paler because it was no longer stained with the sand. Your hair was shining and the skilled hands of one of the maids braided it before your wounds were patched up and your body was covered with a semi-transparent dress. It was very feminine and quite revealing and the colours were all hues of orange.

“Na-Baron wishes to see you now, my Lady,” one of the maids bowed her head at you and two other maids took you by your arms to help you walk down the corridor to join Feyd-Rautha since you were still too weak to walk.

He was sitting by the big table that was filled with so much food you had never seen in your life. The colourful fruit filled with juice and water made your mouth drool.

The maids let go of your arms to bow down in front of him. You did not bow down but he did not comment. He had his legs placed up there on the table’s surface and he smirked at you, beckoning you over with his finger.

“Come, Princess,” he mocked your title and you limped towards him. “Leave us,” he ordered the maids and they left the room with their heads kept low out of fear and respect.

You finally reached the table and you grasped the edge of it for support as you moved even closer to Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen. You were not scared of him because you were not scared of death anymore and his title did not intimidate you because you were of noble blood, too – even though in his eyes you had to be a dirty savage anyway.

His face fascinated you because it was so unnaturally beautiful in a way that no Harkonnen should be. But still, you kept staring at his face with nothing but pure hatred.

“You must be starving,” he pointed out at the chair nearby. “Treat yourself.”

“Thank you,” you drawled out through your gritted teeth and took the seat, too hungry to dismiss such an offer.

You were devouring a grapefruit, allowing its sticky juice to run down your chin when Feyd-Rautha put his legs back on the floor and leaned in over the table to take a closer look at you.

“What do they call you, Princess?” He asked in a low, raspy whisper. “Have my men hurt you badly?”

“(Y/N),” you answered and looked deep into his eyes, showing him that you were not scared of him. “I can handle that.”

“That is a pretty name for a strong woman,” he commented. “You will be my slave,” he said casually and leaned back on the chair.

You didn’t know what to say to this, really. You knew that protesting was foolish – you didn’t want to lose the opportunity to keep your stomach full and it was obvious from the beginning that he hadn’t brought you to the palace as a guest anyway. Still, it felt wrong to quietly accept such a fate.

“I am no maid,” you only said.

“Not like that,” Feyd-Rautha smirked. “Not a maid. A special slave,” he explained but you kept staring at him in silence, killing him with your gaze only. He found it amusing as he chuckled. “You know, Princess, you are a daughter of the desert,” he pointed his finger at you and you raised your eyebrow at him. “I was told by a Bene Gesserit witch that a daughter of the desert would give me a strong heir who shall inherit the Empire. The Harkonnen and Fremen bloodline could not be further apart and that is why mixed together they will create the most powerful species of men. An ultimate man,” Feyd-Rautha explained.

“You are the man from the stars,” you mumbled out, feeling weird with the fact that your prophecy had been true, after all.

Feyd-Rautha was taken aback by your question and he had no idea what it meant but you did not feel like explaining.

“You want me to be your whore. You want me to push out your heirs but they will not be any powerful, ultimate beings, Na-Baron. They will be pure chaos. That is the only thing that can ever come out of our bloodlines mixed together,” you pointed out harshly. “You poison my world, you oppress my people, you killed my family. And now you’re asking me to be your concubine.”

“I must have missed the part where I am asking,” Feyd-Rautha clenched his jaw. You were getting him angry and it was nearly funny how spoiled he was that he really had thought you would agree to such a proposition after such a past.

“Kill me,” you requested and put the grapefruit down. “Kill me because I will be no use to you. I will never be your whore and I would rather die than give birth to your sickly bastards.”

“Why are you loyal to the people who left you behind to rot in the sand?” He asked, tilting his head. He was no longer angry but simply curious.

“That is the custom,” you only answered.

Your relationship with your tribe and your world was of a difficult kind but Feyd-Rautha did not need to know about it. He was an intruder, an outsider, an oppressor. He didn’t deserve to know your heart.

“You can’t run away from your prophecy, Princess,” Feyd-Rautha reminded you before leaving the table and leaving you alone inside the room.

When he left, you went back to eating – as much as you could and as fast as you managed. You felt like an animal and a savage indeed but there was no one to witness that desperate act anyway and you could not remember the last time you had something in your mouth.

Feyd-Rautha did not bother you personally but the maids were following you around and even though you were given your own room with a beautiful view of the desert, you were never truly left alone. You had beautiful but pretty humiliating dresses to wear and you were given baths every day which felt like a profanity for a Fremen.

You were well fed but most of the time you were bored. You knew that Na-Baron was awaiting your answer. You just hadn’t been told how much time exactly you had to make a choice.

Choosing death was simple and easy. Choosing to be his slave-concubine meant betraying your people and betraying who you were, even though you had always felt like you did not fit in with the Fremen and you always wanted to leave Arrakis. It had been a distant dream, too foolish and impossible to even be mentioned to anyone. But now, it could be true. As Feyd-Rautha’s new pet that he seemed to already be pretty fond of, you would be able to visit other worlds.

Your prophecy had claimed, after all, that the man from the stars would come for you. His prophecy had claimed that the daughter of the desert would give him a powerful heir. If it was true and you would become a mother of the future Emperor – well, that was quite tempting, indeed. No matter the price.

Staring at the desert behind your window, you were hugging yourself and biting on your lower lip while you were spending your evening overthinking – it had been your only occupation lately.

You had a feeling that this evening Feyd-Rautha would join you because you were left alone by your maids which was unusual. And indeed, a few moments later the doors opened again and he walked inside. His steps were heavy and confident as usual. It would be your first conversation ever since the one after your arrival.

“My Princess,” he greeted you in that harsh voice of his as he stood behind you and put his hands on your arms in quite a gentle but still very possessive manner.

“I have not made my decision yet,” you only said.

“Decision?” Feyd-Rautha was surprised and then he laughed. “You do not get to choose. Do you think I would let you choose death when I know that your womb might give me an heir that has been promised to me in a prophecy?” He lowered his voice and his words sent a chill down your body. His lips were brushing your neck and earlobe and you tried to get away from his grip but he tightened it and you couldn’t do anything about it.

“I should have killed myself,” you drawled out through gritted teeth.

“I suspected you might do so, therefore I ordered the maids to invade your privacy all day and night, my Princess,” he smirked. You could feel his lips curling on your skin.

“I’m going to kill every child you put inside of me,” you threatened.

“You can try,” he kept smirking but his grasp tightened even further.

“I will not be your slave,” you protested and kept shaking your head even though you knew it was pointless.

“Concubine,” Feyd-Rautha tried to convince you as if he really cared for the transaction to go pretty smoothly. And, apparently, he was in a mood to bargain.

“Wife,” you spat out and a long silence occurred. His grip loosened and he took a step back, eyeing you up and down as he let out a deep laugh. You turned your head around to look at him. “I won’t push out bastards,” you stated.

“I have no desire for a wife,” Na-Baron dismissed you.

“And I have no desire for a husband but that is the only way I see it working,” you explained. “Of course you don’t need my permission to do anything with me. You might use me, imprison me to make sure I won’t get rid of your spawn and then you can kill me. But I am not as weak as you think of me, I am a daughter of the desert. I will change your life into hell and I will make you regret every hour, every day until I eventually die but believe me, I will make this time pass by very slowly,” you threatened.

“And why would I want to marry such a woman?”

“Because I have not described a wife. I have described a slave,” you explained. “Do you wish to know what kind of wife I would be?” You raised your eyebrow and took a step further towards him. He seemed to be intrigued as he tilted his head and you smirked to yourself. It seemed to be working – your plan to tempt him and convince him.

You had to secure your future and your position and since he was your oppressor, you felt no guilt about using manipulation to get there.

“You might think of me as lower than you but I am a Princess just like you are a Na-Baron and only our customs differ. Imagine taking me back to your world, your exotic war prize from Arrakis. You can dress me up in those pretty dresses and show me off, swollen with your special heir. I am a savage to the outsiders but couldn’t you turn the tables and make it an advantage? Your wild, savage wife that nobody knows anything about and who everyone fears?” You whispered, seductively.

“I know what you're doing,” Feyd-Rautha breathed out but even though he was aware of you trying to manipulate him, he was visibly giving in anyway. “You’re going to kill me in my sleep,” he added, looking intensely into your eyes and you chuckled at that.

“Perhaps,” you shrugged your arms. “But isn’t the prophecy worth the risk?” You asked.

After all, you were sacrificing and risking a lot, too. And it would be only fair if the transaction costed you both the equal amount.

“You are the jewel of Arrakis,” Feyd-Rautha chuckled and raised his hand to undo your braids and watch your hair let loose.

“And you are its poison,” you remarked as he smirked, eyeing you up and down.

“Together, we can rule over the worlds,” he whispered.

“Or destroy them,” you added.

Na-Baron shook his head but the smirk remained on his lips. He found it amusing that you had an answer for everything and how gloomy they all were. However, so far, it was entertaining for him. He brushed your collarbone with his fingertips.

“I surely have more experience in destroying them than I have in ruling over them,” he confessed but the hunger in his eyes was a clear message to you that he did not mean only Arrakis but also women overall.

“Some are too wild to be ruled over and too wild to be destroyed,” you informed him and he found your eyes again after staring at your chest and neck. For the first time, you saw that he was genuinely intrigued. Perhaps he finally saw you as a challenge. A riddle. A savage to tame.

Whatever would keep you alive and in a position of power.

Because no matter how much you were trying to convince yourself that you were ready to die, this life stubbornly seemed to keep you alive and there must have been a purpose in it.

Therefore, you were ready to receive everything this new life had to offer for you now. As if you had died in that temple and now you were given a second chance.

MASTERLIST

#feyd rautha x reader #feyd rautha harkonnen x reader #austin butler x reader #lilysfiction

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