#hes neurodivergent just like the rest of us

[arliedraws]

All this anti-Remus talk is making me like him even more 😂

I love that he’s a character who is so fixated on image and how he comes off. He’s such a cold person! Detached! Won’t form close bonds! Like…his loving parents fucked him up by keeping him away from all other children until Hogwarts. I love how this plays into his character again and again and again.

I put the rest under the cut because it gets a bit tangential, but whatever, I was feeling a bit heated.

I feel like Remus doesn’t actually know how to make friends—he has let everyone come to him. James and Sirius formed their little group, and Remus has always been in awe of what friends will do FOR him. What did Remus do for his friends? Maybe Remus learns how to accept love, but he is not very good at giving it back.

It’s so interesting to me that Remus doesn’t become Harry’s go-to even after they spent hours together. Harry allows Remus to see his most vulnerable side, and Remus doesn’t reciprocate even after the truth comes out. At the very least, he could write Harry. He could visit Harry in the summer.

But I actually LOVE this about Remus. I love that he’s written as a warm, inviting sort of person when he’s actually someone who is terrified of forming close bonds. No one is allowed to see the real Lupin, and once someone has seen a part of himself he doesn’t like, he immediately detaches himself and disappears. Remus wants to appear in control of himself because he is concerned more about his image than doing the right thing. At the end of PoA, I’m sure he’s upset that he nearly killed Harry and co, obviously, but more importantly, he’s embarrassed that he lost control. If he really cared about the safety of students, he would have revealed Sirius’s disguise to Dumbledore as soon as Sirius escaped Azkaban.

The point of his character is “what you see on the surface is not necessarily what lies below.” It’s one of the most salient themes of PoA.

Anyway, it’s uncomfortable! So many people want to make Remus a “model of marginalization” - who, depending on the fanon, falls on one end of the spectrum which is “ohhhh poor disabled guy :((( he can’t do anything because he’s a pathetic baby” or “look how hot and tall and rational and intelligent he is despite his poverty/disability!!!!”

It’s SO INFANTILIZING. I don’t think Remus is a bad guy or a good guy—I think that his particularly negative character traits are a result of prejudice towards his condition, his upbringing, and his internalized prejudice towards werewolves. So I am not saying he’s a complete asshole. Obviously. My point, though, is that he has friends who support him in school, particularly James, who break the law and risk torture prison (and bodily harm from a werewolf) to support him.* And Remus…he does not do much to reciprocate that sort of love. The very least he can do for James is to check in on Harry (he doesn’t even need to say hi—just literally see that he’s ok!). James risked his life for Remus, and Remus won’t risk Dumbledore’s disapproval to reciprocate.

He continually does the LEAST for Harry. Harry has to beg him to teach him the Patronus Charm. And when Harry is clearly craving his parents’ voices as they’re dying, Remus doesn’t even offer a nugget of “ohhhh, gosh, Harry, let’s give you some good stories about your dad, ok?”

This is a cold, broken man who has convinced himself that being alone is safe because you can never be rejected. This is Remus’s greatest fear. He’s the teacher that needs to be liked but he hides behind professionalism when it suits him. His “nice guy” traits are a fucking ACT. I want people to explore more about his negative traits! He blames his condition when people get too close, and when people manage to climb his walls to try to get close to him, he pushes them away.

Chronic illness does not make you a good person—it just makes life harder. Remus accepts love and support from his friends—and yes, they SHOULD give him love and support because this is what we owe each other, but Remus also owes his friends love and support. It’ll look different from how James, Sirius, and Peter can support him, but you don’t get to just take from your friends without giving back. Your friends are not there to be your mommy. Sometimes, you’ll go through periods where your friends are holding you up and you just need to accept that they don’t resent you for it, but if you’re willing to accept help, you’d better be willing to return it later. As someone who has a few people in their life who take and take and give little in return, I can tell you, it starts to feel like your only purpose is to carry them on your shoulders. And man, it’s fucking exhausting. Sometimes I need to be carried too.

I have no idea how Remus behaved at Hogwarts regarding his friends on a day to day basis because Harry never sees evidence of this, but we see him as an adult who is unwilling to support his friend’s orphaned kid in ANY meaningful way…unless Harry begs him. In the end, Remus is still an autonomous adult and Harry is a child in need. In this situation, at the bare minimum, Remus has the power to pick up a pen and write.

So why don’t we see this more in fic? You all know I’m a Sirius stan, but I am CONSTANTLY critiquing Sirius’s relationship with masculinity. Sirius is my favorite character, and I LOVE exploring the uncomfortable parts of him—he’s cold when he perceives that he has been emasculated, even belittling Harry when he’s insulted. He’ll put himself in danger to protect Harry when all Harry really wants is for Sirius to be there for him (which Sirius can’t do in OotP). These are the bits that make me queasy—and I love exploring them!

Why not explore the ugly parts of Remus? You say you want interesting, well-rounded characters with chronic illness/disabilities/neurodivergence? Then let them be interesting. Make them complicated and embrace the icky parts of them. If you want, explore how society has created a cold, sad, wet noodle Remus and then GIVE HIM A PATH TO GROWTH. Like… if you don’t like these parts, give him scenarios so he can grow and become a better person.

Anyway, stop fucking throwing around words like “ableism” when you hear something you don’t like about a character. You don’t know the real person behind their username. Most of us here have some sort of disability/neurodivergence/chronic illness, etc, so stop fucking assuming we’re Chad Abled-Bodied or Karen Neurotypical, ffs.

It’s fucking insulting and infantilizing that we can’t discuss complexity in characters who are marginalized in their society. By excusing all of their less than cute actions, you’re essentially saying, “This is not a full human being with a full range of emotion and flaws—they are a perfect little baby who doesn’t deserve reproach, who can do whatever he wants!”

But that’s just me, I guess.

—

* (Also, side note, Moony the werewolf could have very well killed any one of them. Additionally, the theory that Moony couldn’t hurt them in Animagus form was ONLY A THEORY. It might not have worked at ALL and they risked their lives to test it.)

[lesbicosmos]

so last week i asked my physics teacher if we'd be doing any practical work next tuesday (ie today) because a. it's my birthday and b. we usually do practicals when we have double lessons

he was just like "oh it's your birthday next week? i'll make you a cake what cake do you like"

i thought he was joking but i answered anyway

turns out he was in fact not joking. i walked into my lesson today and there was a lemon cake on the table. then everyone started singing. then we just spent the first ten minutes eating cake. it was great. (we didn't do any practical work in the end but that's fine)

[dollypopup]

the more I think about it and rewatch his scenes, the more I cannot help but realize that Colin is coded as a neurodivergent character. At least, I can very clearly see how Luke Newton, a neurodivergent actor, is playing Colin as a neurodivergent character

a special interest in Greek mythology? in traveling? neurodivergent

taking people's word at face value without 'reading between the lines'? neurodivergent

not being able to read Penelope's feelings regardless of how 'obvious' they are? neurodivergent

brain constantly bouncing around from one idea to the next (as in the books)? neurodivergent

not saying the 'right thing' and admitting to having to rehearse important conversations? neurodivergent

all that rejection sensitivity and regret he had well over a year after his engagement blew up? neurodivergent

masking in public? the whole 'charming facade'? neurodivergent

the man straight up STIMS, I mean how often do we see him fidgeting or playing with something? he has an oral fixation like no one's business, always eating, rubbing his mouth, licking his lips

I just can't unsee it

and, one day, i hope our fandom is going to be ready to recognize how many of the things we've unjustly called him an 'idiot' or 'stupid' for is actually just him existing with a neurodivergent brain and how hurtful that can come across to us neurodivergent peeps who identify with him

[hella1975]

Oh Hella your DM sounds like a good one! Hope you have fun and that coin is amazing should we add practice the coin trick to your schedule? /gen

ACTUALLY YEAH PLEASE

[tibli]

im glad i grew up w funny, clearly neurodivergent parents bc i like to think my humor is one of my best qualities

[applecherry108]

I’ve been wounded by a tiktok. Well, I’ve had wound reopened but a tiktok.

Basically, a critique of a family prank video in which a husband pretends he’s destroyed his wife’s possessions, but not really. And the critique boils down to “Your panic and distress should never be the punchline to any joke or prank ever.”

When I was in college, my first year, pokemon soul silver came out. And I loved that game. I spent over 100 hours on it the first month alone and was deeply attached to my team.

I found out the following year, that one guy in the friend group had been planning, colluding with my other friends, to get a reset copy of the game and switch it out with my copy so I’d think all my data had been erased.

The entire friend group knew.

And only a single one of them stopped and said “hey, that’s fucked up actually.”

So this guy didn’t go through with it.

And I found out about his plan, while I was dating him my second year. At the dinner table. With the rest of the friend group. Who admitted that yeah, that almost happened and they were just going to go along with it.

I was fucking shocked and devastated just hearing what almost happened. This was over 10 years ago and I’m still traumatized by the thought of it.

What I hate most though, was that even after hearing this fucked up plan that would’ve fully sent me into a meltdown during finals week, I still kept dating that guy for nearly a year. I still kept all those friends who would’ve betrayed me throughout the rest of college.

And maybe part of me wishes they had gone through with it, just so I could’ve cut all those assholes out of my life way sooner, because that guy was still abusive and cruel. He didn’t change. My friends were still heartless and careless with me, and none of them even attempted to keep in touch after graduation.

My distress is not a fucking punchline, and the fact that every single friend I had in college except one was complicit in making it the punchline, is a scar that I don’t think will ever heal.

[genderqueerdykes]

as someone who has been scarred for life by experiences at gay bars, i need people to understand it's beyond tacky to mock people who want queer spaces beyond queer bars- it's dangerous.

let me explain. i went to 2 of my local queer bars a lot last year, as much as i was able to despite being poor. i witnessed a fist fight that was so bloody that ended up with a transmisogynistic drag queen getting hit in the head with a metal baton. the sight caused me to uncontrollably throw up in the bathroom of the club because of how gruesome it was. they had to close down the club and forard people out the back door because of how out of hand this person got- he was screaming transmisogynstic slurs and phrases at the bouncers were were transfem.

i was also sexually assaulted at these places, i was repeatedly groped by several people who i was not interacting with in the first place who found me attractive and decided physically grabbing me on numerous occasions was the way to get my attention. being femme in a queer bar is dangerous even if the people groping you are gay men.

i am also a recovering addict who dealt with alcohol issues in the past and could be considered a recovering alcoholic. i don't want to be around alcohol. i don't want to smell it. it triggers awful memories and also sometimes makes me consider getting a drink, but i can't have one, because the medications i take will cause a fatal reaction- i don't want to be tempted to drink, because it will kill me.

it's not right to mock someone or call them childish or whatever for not wanting to go to a club. whenever alcohol is involved, people's inhibitions are gone and they will do whatever. this includes fighting. i witnessed several other fights. just because it's a queer bar doesn't mean there won't be fights. and it especialyl doesn't m ean that you won't get groped or assaulted because, like i said, since alcohol is involved and it's a bar, there's a high chance this can and will happen.

queer people are not inherently safe angels to be around by virtue of being queer. there are still transphobes in queer bars. tranny chasers come to these bars. homophobic lesbians show up and lesbophobic gay men show up. drag queens and performers bring their cishet friends and family to support their shows. these are not perfect havens. they are not safe. we should not force other queers to interact with inherently dangerous spaces if these are supposed to be our safe spaces.

also these spaces are not friendly to people with disabilities; wheelchair users have nowhere to go especially when it's very crowded. other mobility aids get kicked and knocked over. neurodivergent people can get overstimulated by the deafening music very quickly. photosensitive people can have seizures due to the strobing lights. people with emetophobia like me run the risk of running into those types of triggers. people who are overstimulated by intoxicated people have no choice but to deal with it. dancing is one of the only activities to do other than drink and not many disabled (or even abled) people can dance for extended periods of time comfortably.

not to mention these spaces are not geared toward aromantic or asexual people at all, either. there is a long list of reasons why bars should not be our primary venues of interaction with one another. they serve a specific purpose- for people who want to cruise- but for the rest of us, it's really crucial that we have spaces that provide meaningful interactions with other queers on other levels of our identities.

some people just want to hang out with other queers in a quiet environment and craft, or shop, or drink coffee, or read books together, or just about any other activity on planet earth, and that's not "lame" or "cringy" or bad in any way- these are extremely normal and necessary parts of human interaction that we all require and crave and it's normal to want to do healthy, domestic things with other queers. we need this in our lives.

please take it seriously when people attempt to create queer spaces that don't involve alcohol and bars. it's necessary for our survival and well being as a community.

[lgbtlunaverse]

This page from the adventurer's bible makes me want to cry

Like basically any neurodivergent dungeon meshi fan, I see a lot of myself in the Touden siblings. But I was blindsided by just how much I suddenly related to Falin in this little comic from the adventure bible's complete version.

It's about the Touden siblings' differing relationships with their parents, and why Laios still holds their treatment of Falin against them, while Falin herself doesn't.

We know that Falin was isolated and ostraziced by their village after she saved Laios from a ghost, displaying her uncanny affinity for magic. Her parents, instead of defending her, sent her away, which angered Laios so much he ran way himself before Falin even left for magic school, hoping to make a living so he and Falin could live together alone.

He tells Marcile this, but when she goes to Falin, she says she sees things differently. Her father sent her to magic school to protect her form the rest of the village without having to cause a conflict. He didn't explain that, and we actually see her burst into tears when he says it.

But, well... Laios was gone for a year before Falin went to magic school, and everyone else in the village avoided her. The understanding Falin has with her parents to me looks like one borne out of necessity, she literally didn't have anyone else to talk to.

And this is where we get to the page that made me want to cry

Like I said, I relate to the Toudens because I'm neurodivergent myself. that feeling of suddenly realizing you're disliked, but not knowing what you did wrong or what you should have done instead? Yeah... that's one I recognize.

When I was around 9 years old, the same age Falin is in this comic, a bunch of kids in my class decided to make a "game" where you lost if you touched me. It was basically the 'cheese-touch' from diary of a wimpy kid, except I always had it and couldn't pass it along. They'd pretend I was poisonous or disgusting and run away from me screaming or gagging. The point was to make fun of me. But my autistic little 9 year old ass thought "Oh I get it! It's tag but I'm always it!" So I... played along. Running at a boy and having him fall on the ground screaming in fake pain because you tapped him is, in isolation, pretty funny.

It wasn't until months into the "game" that I realized it was meant to be meanspirited. That the reason I was the one who was always 'it' wasn't an arbritrary rule but the whole point. Because I was weird and gross. I wasn't in on the joke, I was the punchline.

Falin may have come to understand her parents' intentions, but she didn't always. The adventure bible actually tells us that she at first didn't even notice that the rest of their village disliked her. She clearly knows now, but she had to be told. So when her mom tried to exorcise her, she just saw it as an activity she got to do with a mother she usually didn't get to spend much time with because of her poor health. It's only Laios who notices something is wrong.

(Sidenote, Laios being hyper-aware of people's poor attitudes towards Falin but completely blindsided when he's in the same spot, like with Toshiro, is also very relatable as an eldest sibling)

It probably also took Falin months, until after her brother had left and she had no one but her parents, to realize why her mother had been doing all those things.

And I know they're not the same. Even misguidedly, Falin's mom was trying to help her, not make fun of her like those boys in my class. (Though, as a queer person who also cares a lot about the queercoding in Falin's storyline, a parent trying to 'exorcise' their child of a fundamental part of them the parent thinks is evil or corruptive? yeah... that's not perfectly wholesome)

But do you know what I did, when I finally figured out the game was always meant to make fun of me?

To me, it looked like I had a choice.

See, those boys eventually figured out I didn't understand that they were being mean to me. I'd laugh every time I managed to catch one of them, I was visibly having fun. And while it no doubt only made me more of a weirdo in their eyes, they never informed me that I shouldn't be enjoying myself. That the point was for me to feel hurt.

So now that I did know, I had a choice. I could either get upset, and let the insult land as it was supposed to. That wouldn't stop them, because making fun of me was the original goal. Or I could ignore it and go on as usual. They had already accepted that I didn't get it, and they weren't gona stop me from having fun, so why should I?

And the thing is that I had... one friend, in that whole class. One person who actually liked talking to me and hanging out with me. I was lonely. And the 'game' provided me with another social interaction, mean-spirited as it was, that I desperately needed. And it was so delightfully simple. Navigating actual friendships as a kid with autism and adhd was so fucking complicated, and I'd never know when I might break an inivisble rule. But I knew the rules to the game perfectly!

Sometimes, if I was chasing one of them, the others would trap him and hold him down so I could tap him. In those moments it actually did kind of feel like I was playing with them, rather than against them. And it didn't change much, they didnt start actually liking me. But they were willing to roll with the fact that I wasn't upset, and I took advantage of that because I needed to.

So you can look at Falin seeing the best in her parents as her being naïve, but I look at this page and I see myself, at first unable to differentiate between playing and being made fun of. And then later, when I did see the difference, deciding not to get mad about it because that'd mean losing that social interaction, and I couldn't afford to.

Like I said, Falin probably first realized this in the year she spent with her brother gone, and everyone else avoiding her like the plague. If she refused to talk to her parents, like Laios did, she'd have no one left.

I see a lot of people relating to the fight between Laios and Toshiro. that frustration when you realize someone you thougth was your friend actually hates you, and they never said anything, never gave you a chance to fix it because you had no idea that you were even doing something wrong! And I can see that, too. But sometimes, when people don't fully hate you, it feels better to go along with the pretending. Because adressing it won't fix it. Because the problem isn't a specific behaviour, it's you. And if they're willing to tolerate you, despite the fact that it's you, then you'll take it. Because other people do hate you, so this is the best you'll get.

[bloodyshadow1]

look, the thing with Toshiro is that he is not a bad guy, I don't think he would work out with Falin no matter the case, but he's not a bad guy. He is just a guy in a foreign land, and he was sheltered as a rich guys son who has retainers instead of friends, he doesn't know how to act towards people.

He is friends with Laios, yes things in ep 17 came to a boil and Toshiro finally exploded, but that doesn't mean he really hates him. He might not be the best friend Laios imagined him to be, but he doesn't hate the guy despite what he said. Yes, I'm sure he was genuinely bothered by the way Laios acts like the rest of the party, sans Falin, but him exploding at Laios because it's the worst possible time is not the same as him secretly always hating him.

At the time things break bad, had just had a party wipe where not only did they lose to a dragon, the woman he was infatuated with didn't leave with them. He did what he thought was best, get skilled retainers and head back into the dungeon. He has been fighting monsters through the dungeon, not resting, sleeping or eating for days. He finds out the same girl he likes was revived with dark magic, then turned into a Chimera that tears through his retainers, and almost kills them. As he's panicking Laios keeps saying the wrong thing at the wrong time and he finally explodes.

People are not just who they are at their worst moments, just like they're not who they only who they are at the best moments in their life. He's not an asshole for believing Marcille is dangerous because of her using dark magic when he thinks it turned Falin into a chimera and the social norms is dark magic is evil. Especially when Falin became the most powerful monster in the dungeon capable of using magic that slaughtered his retainers and every other adventurer in a few minutes.

*Spoilers for the manga*

When he's had time to think and get some rest and food, Toshiro is on Laios' side, willing to fight elite elven dungeon specialists on his behalf.

Also I know Laios is the fandom's precious little autistic bean, but he isn't guiltless in their relationship. Sure, there was not a malicious bone in Laios' body, but it doesn't change that he saw a foreigner in a bar and blasted him with questions without asking him his name. Yes, Toshiro should have explained, but everyone in the Touden party is neurodivergent, you cannot change my mind. Sometimes it is easier to avoid awkwardness by not correcting people when they get your name wrong. Toshiro didn't think he's be a part of Laios' party for years, he thought it was a meeting with a stranger in a bar, and then he's Shuro for 2 years to everyone in the party and the adventurers community.

People are complicated, and they should be allowed to be. Toshiro might not get a lot of chapters, but it is clear he is not just some asshole who has secretly hated Laios, it's just at the worst moment of his life after a series of terrible weeks things come to a boil. The whole manga/anime has more nuanced characters than any I've read/watched.

[pliablehead]

DO YOU BELIEVE IN THE PRESERVATION OF PHYSICAL MEDIA? DO YOU WANT TO HELP MY 93-YEAR-OLD GRANDPA?

(cw for deaths in the family)

My grandfather has until the end of this calendar year to move out of the house he's lived in for my whole adult life. While he's been living here, he's lost his wife, his son (my dad), and his oldest daughter, each of whom was living in this home with him at their time of death. The house is way too big and old and nasty for one nonagenarian, so we're honestly glad he's getting bumped somewhere else, but what this means is that all the accumulated STUFF of four people is in this house, and he absolutely cannot take it all with him when he moves into his new tiny apartment for one.

A piece of this project I have taken on is trying to help get rid of three HUGE boxes worth of DVDs. I know not a lot of people have DVD players anymore, but I also know that a lot of people here on the internet (myself included!!) are really passionate about media preservation in an age when Netflix and other streamer services can just remove your favorite programming at the drop of a hat and there's nothing you can do about it. I would REALLY love to send these DVDs to people who care about them rather than just trying to offload them at a media resale store or something. Everything is pay what you want, although I'd love if you'd at least cover shipping (though it's honestly fine if you can't), and ideally I will be giving anything I make back to my grandpa to help him with the transition into this new living situation.

>>CLICK HERE FOR A LIST OF ALL THE FUN DVDS FOR SALE<<

** IMPORTANT NOTE TO KEEP IN MIND: Any titles marked with an asterisk are NOT official, commercially released DVDs, but are burned DVD-R copies made by my dad (an obsessive collector/tinkerer who in hindsight was so incredibly neurodivergent). They're still all in nice cases with legit-looking paper inserts that he made and everything.

This list includes things like: a lot of BBC or PBS public programming, classic films from before 1970, war movies, huge chunks of Monty Python, random sci-fi and horror offerings, and much more! If you or anyone you may know is at ALL interested, I encourage you to reach out, or to please at least share to a wider audience, and I will do my best to stay on top of people's requests, ship them out promptly, and keep the gdoc list up to date when things go! Thank you so much for helping me and my Pappap out! ♥

EDIT TO ADD: I am from the continental US, as are, I imagine, the majority of these DVDs. I am happy to ship internationally if I can be reimbursed for shipping, but I cannot guarantee the DVDs will play in another region.

~

OCTOBER 21 UPDATE: Visited again this week and picked up EVEN MORE DVDs! List in the original GDoc has been expanded to include the rest of the haul. Maybe take a second look if you were on the fence at first!

[dreamerinthemoonlight]

Genshin Guys with an S/O Dealing with Sensory Overload (Wriothesley, Diluc, Alhaitham, Neuvillette)

Please note that this is all from my experience. Obviously not everyone is going to experience it like this. Basically this is me shamelessly self-inserting again. I mean, what's new?

I'm going to format this as kind of scenarios in bullet point form, rather than my usual

CW: hurt/comfort, neurodivergent reader

Wriothesly x gn!reader, Diluc x gn!reader, Alhaitham x gn!reader, Neuvillette x gn!reader

Requests and Ask Box is OPEN

Wriothesley

Sensory overload isn't really that uncommon around Wriothesly

And it's not because he's loud or anything, but the Fortress of Meropide isn't a quiet place. I imagine there's always a lot of little sounds even at night. Stuff like dripping pipes, hissing steam, little things

And even if you're not hanging out at Fortress, the city isn't even much quieter

Thankfully he's the perceptive, people-smart type so there's no way in hell sensory overload is getting past him

Tight fists, pinched eyebrows, flinching at loud noises, yeah, he ain't missin' that shit

When he notices you doing that he's quick to finish whatever conversation he's in and bringing you to a quieter location

He's either soundproofed his room or set aside some space in the fortress where you can be alone in the quiet. If you need music to avoid complete and total quiet he has some soft records for you to listen to

Diluc

Diluc has an easier time dealing with the sensory overload

When the day has left you worn out, overloaded, and on edge, wincing at even soft noises, you seek out Diluc

Of course, if you're helping/hanging out at the Angel's Share, chances are he's already at least noticed your reactions to the ambient chaos

If he can't get away from the bar, he hands you the keys to his room and tells you to go rest, that he'll be up when he's free

At the Winery, he's left instructions that even if he's not there, you should be brought to a quiet out of the way room (ehem, his room) and given whatever you need

In either location, as soon as he's free he's coming to make sure you're alright. He usually has something for your headache, knowing that you've probably got one

If you let him, he'll want to hold you, rubbing circles into your shoulder. But if you need space, he'll leave you be once

More than anything he's intent on making any of his spaces safe and comfortable for you

Alhaitham

Alhaitham is an asshole and doesn't people, but when it comes to sensory overload he's 100% sympathetic

I honestly wouldn't be surprised if it's something he deals with on the regular

It's also not something you can hide from him (in fact you might go to him because he's a quiet person who has no issues telling anyone who would bother you to go sit on it)

The first thing he does is kick whoever he's talking to out of the room. Unlike Wrio, he doesn't bother wrapping up the conversation, he just tells them to leave

If you're at his house, Kaveh gets told to find a different room to occupy and Kaveh actually listens (I mean, Kaveh is a nice guy who isn't going to be mean to you just to give his roommate the metaphorical middle finger. Really, neither of them are.)

Once he's gotten rid of any annoyances, he's handing over his headphones

He also helps darken the room your in (modifications Kaveh helped with--I feel like both of them are far more willing to accommodate you than each other, even if it means working together)

After that, he just leaves you alone. If you have a headache, he'll find something to help, but he just goes to read

If you're in a place where he can't just shoo people away and remove any offending sensations, he goes out of his way to comfort you (which took him forever to figure out how to do, but he likes you so it's worth the effort). Even if it's just lending you headphones while he takes you by the hand and leads you through the city

Neuvillette

Honestly, it takes Neuvie a while to get used to a S/O who is prone to Sensory Overload

He's not human and is very much accustomed to the chaos of the Opera Epiclese, Palais Mermonia, and Fontaine City in general

So when Sedene lets you in to Neuvie's office (he's left instructions that unless he's in a conversation you can't be privy to, you're just to be let in) and you're nearly in tears, he's very concerned

Anything he's doing is immediately set to the side so he can figure out what's wrong

When he figures out that your brain just can't process any more input without feeling like it's about to spontaneously combust, he's a little confused, but he focuses more on how to help you

First things first, he has you hydrate while he tells Sedene to not let anyone in unless it's an emergency and finishes up whatever he's doing. If you're not feeling well, he wants to be able to focus his attention on you

Then he takes you somewhere quieter and darker

Eventually, much like Diluc and Wrio, he sets aside a place for you to go. He makes sure you can keep it as dark and quiet as you want, while making sure any sensory things you gravitate to are easily accessed

On days where you decide to take a nap, it's not uncommon to see him wrapped around you, letting his naturally cool temperature soothe you

[hyukalyptus]

i'll be okay—yeonjun x fem!afab!reader. reader gets overstimulated and they have comfort sex lol. NSFW/MDNI!

cw. established relationship, afab!reader, chubby!reader implied, reader experiences sensory overload (but there is no specific disability mentioned), yeonjun has stubble ehehe, nipple play, cunnilingus, use of sex toys, unprotected sex (pls wear protection ppl), creampie , pet names (love, baby, jjuni), "i love you," reader wears a dress, lowkey lovemaking, kinda cheesy, i think that's it?  notes. so this is kinda supposed to be, like, as a result of sensory overload. i wrote this as a neurodivergent person who experiences sensory overload, but anyone can get overstimulated, so even if you aren't neurodivergent, you may relate to this! and remember- disability, overstimulation, and sensory overload are different experiences for everyone! no one experiences them the same, SO just keep in mind this is kinda as a result of my personal experience. thank u :3 smut under cut. wc. 1.8K

“I’m sorry we had to come home early,” you say, closing and locking your apartment’s front door. “It’s this fabric…” Tugging at the dress you’d picked out for tonight’s date, you shiver. You knew the fabric wasn’t your favorite, but the dress fit you so perfectly. It couldn’t be bad for one night, right? 

The combination of a stressful day at work, the cacophony of the bustling restaurant, the glaring city lights, and the dress' god awful fabric proved overwhelming. Sensory overload loomed over you from the moment you stepped into the restaurant, but you tried to push it aside, which is never a good idea.

You didn’t have to say anything. Yeonjun knew. He always knows. 

But you wanted to stay, to salvage the perfect date in the perfect dress. And oh how sexy did he look with his slightly grown-out beard, knowing how much you loved the look. Tonight was supposed to be special, and excitement radiated from both of you.

But some days are simply bad and this is one of them. 

“Don’t apologize, love,” Yeonjun says, draping his jacket across the dining table chair. “I couldn’t wait to get you out of that dress anyway.” You wanted to hug him, kiss him, do other things to him, but you couldn’t wait to get this fucking dress off. 

Exhaling a sigh of relief, the familiar comfort of your favorite t-shirt and shorts envelops you as you step out of the closet, finding him patiently waiting on the edge of the bed.

“How are you feeling?” 

“Better—still a bit, you know,” you respond, shaking your hands. “But I’ll be okay.” 

“Need some water?” You nod, watching him walk calmly to the kitchen. How does he always stay so calm? Always your rock. “Here you go, love.” Quietly observing as you settle, he says, “You did look really pretty in that dress.” 

Sitting up, you cross your legs, give him a gentle smile, and say, “Thank you, baby.”

“Touch?” 

Humming, you nod. Warmth spreads through you as his hand gracefully glides from your arm down to squeeze your thigh. Leaning closer, his thumb traces the apple of your cheek before his lips meet yours. 

“You’re always pretty though.” 

The kiss deepens and he leans over, guiding you to lie down as your arms naturally wrap around his shoulders. In his embrace, you find solace and a sense of security, appreciating the constant reassurance he brings into your life.

Every subtle move he makes sends a ripple of response through your body—his hand slipping beneath your shirt to rest on your waist, the delicate texture of his fingertips, even the slightest pinches. It all made you jump. He gently squeezes your tit, making a smile tug at the corners of your lips before swiping a thumb across your nipple experimentally. 

“Sorry—“

You hum, like nuh-uh, you’re not done yet before pulling him back to you. Breaths heavy and deep, he whispers your name as if to ask if you’re okay. He’d never want to overwhelm you, but you want him. 

Trailing his lips down your neck, you say, “I’m still really sensitive, so I’ll have to…you know, take lots of breaks.”

“That’s okay, baby…” Lips brushing your own, the hotness of his breath against your lips grounds you in the moment, hyper aware of his body on yours. “You know I’ll always stop when you need me to.” Tugging at the hem of your shirt—he always lets you take off your own shirt when you’re extra sensitive—his hands rub your waist, giving you time to adjust to sudden exposure. This definitely isn’t the first time you’ve had sex, but each time feels exciting and new. 

Peppering your skin with the sweetest, most sensual kisses until—

Fuck.

Your breath catches in your throat at his tongue against your nipple. A stiffness takes over and as usual, he notices. 

“Feelin’ okay?” He feels good…really good. But you’re still anxious and you still need to look out for yourself to make sure you don’t get too overwhelmed. 

“Yes—” you gasp as your eyes squeeze shut, letting his lips explore your body. He can feel it. That you’re okay. That you want him. But he wants you to say it. 

“More?” 

“Please.” 

“I need you to say it, love.”

Ah, he’s always had such a thing for consent. And you have too. Knowing—saying out loud—how much one wants the other is delicious. 

You chuckle and say, “Ask me first.”

Feeling his smile against your chest, your jitters turn into butterflies. “Love,” he says, peppering your skin with kisses. “I want to…” he starts, skating his lips across your tummy. “God, there’s so much I wanna do to you.” 

Making his way down toward your hips, you can’t help but run your fingers through his hair. “Tell me.”

“I wanna make you feel so good,” he whispers. “Wanna give you one of the best orgasms you’ve ever had. I wanna taste your pussy. I wanna fuck you so slowly it makes you crazy.” Watching how he places the softest kisses everywhere, you’ll forever know how much he loves your body. “Is that okay?”

You hum, giving him the okay to move closer and closer to your pussy, he watches your every reaction. 

Flicking his tongue over your clit, you gasp. You feel it all—everything. His slippery tongue, the cotton bed sheets sticking to your damp back, the uncomfortable position your pillow is forcing you into, his fingernails digging into your thighs, the roughness of his five o’clock shadow against your thighs. Its—

“Stop,” you say, pushing yourself away from him, taking deep breaths. “Too much—sorry…”

“Never apologize, love.” While you’re calming yourself down, he asks, “What was it?”

“Your…um, your little stubble,” you say, chuckling. “Sorry, you look so cute, but…”

“It’s okay.” He smiles reassuringly. “I just won’t eat you out. You wanna use a toy?” Before you can even answer with your simple nod, he’s opening one of the bedside tables. “Which one?”

“Surprise me.” Smirking, he pulls out your favorite bullet vibrator— “Ah, that’s the one I was hoping you’d pick.” It’s a comforting one. You know exactly what to expect from it and there aren’t any surprises, which is just what you need right now.

“How did I know that? You wanna use it or do you want me to?”

“You.”

“Tell me if it's too much, okay?” He starts it off on its lowest setting, slowly easing it onto your clit. Waves of relaxation wash over you, giving you the chance to calm down. He can tell by your moans that you want— “More?” You nod, answering with a quick mhmm and he turns it up to your favorite speed, hitting just the right spot. 

“Oh, fuck, that’s good,” you say breathlessly. Placing gentle kisses on your ribs, he’s getting you used to the feeling of him again. “Can you—” It’s like he read your mind. His tongue finds your nipple, going around it so deliciously. 

You start squirming, ready for more. 

“Jjuni…” you whine, back arching while you claw at his chest. “Need you. Please?” He doesn’t have to ask what position. You have a favorite for these nights. Simple, but effective—a nice kneeling missionary. You’re in a comfy position, he can see his cock going in and out of your perfect pussy, and he can touch your whole body with easy access to your clit. 

“Breathe for me, okay?” How did he know you were holding your breath? You force yourself to relax, his warm hands soothing you even more. He places a butterfly-soft kiss to your lips. “You’re so beautiful, babe.” 

“So are you,” you smile, watching him rub gentle circles on one hip while he slowly pushes himself inside you. “Yeonjun—”

“Fuck, you feel so good, love,” he says. “I’m gonna start moving, okay?”

Nodding, you grab a fistful of sheets at how simply incredible he feels. But—

“Wait, wait.”

“Too much?” Changing his pace, it feels— “How’s this?”

“Oh,” your chest heaves. “That feels good, yeah. Sorry,” you say nervously.

Truthfully, he didn’t mind this at all. He likes taking his time with you. The only thing he doesn’t like is that you feel like you’re burdening him with all the breaks and pauses. But he’s told you so many times, “You’re absolutely perfect, love.” 

You sigh and say, “I love you.” That wasn’t the first time you’d said that, not even that evening, but saying it during sex always turned him to putty. 

“I love you too, baby. So much.” Reaching for your vibrator again, he presses it to your clit, sending shocks through your body. And it feels…so good. But just for a moment. 

“Ah,” you sit up, pushing him out. “I need to take a break.” He nods, giving you space to take a few sips of the water he’d gotten you earlier. “Thank you.”

“Don’t worry about it,” he smiles. “You wanna try being on top?”

“Nah, I like this position. If that’s okay?”

“Perfectly fine by me.” Spreading your legs again, he runs his hands over your waist, feeling you ground yourself again. “Ready?” 

Every step of the way, he’s so attentive to you and ensures you don’t get overwhelmed or more overstimulated than you already are. And he’s always been like this. Always. Even since the first time you slept together. Sleeping with someone you cared about for the first time was always overwhelming—so many things to think about—am I being too loud? Do I taste okay? Am I making them feel good? It was stressful. But he picked up on it immediately. 

He treated you perfectly. How you always wanted to be treated. He read you so well. 

Those questions inside your head turned into whispers from him—let me hear you, baby. God, you’re so fucking delicious. Fuck, you make me feel so good, love. 

“Jjuni, can you use my toy again?”

“Of course,” he smiles. “Feel good?” You nod again, edging close to your orgasm. As it builds, his whispers become more fervent. “You’re doing so good for me, love.” His voice is soothing, a constant reassurance that you’re in a safe and pleasurable space. Adding just the right amount of pressure to your clit with the perfect pace of his thrusts, your body finds itself in a whirlwind of pleasure and ecstasy as you reach your orgasm. 

The room fills with the subtle hum of the toy, the soft sounds of your moans, and his gentle breaths as he maintains his attentiveness. 

Coming down from your high, you catch your breath and say, “Please cum inside me. I wanna feel you. Please.” He nods, discarding the toy to the mattress, squeezing your tit, not only for himself, but he knows it comforts you. “Please.” 

His grunts get deeper, his thrusts get sloppier, and with a few final thrusts, he reaches his own climax, filling you with warmth and a deep feeling of connection between you. 

Placing a gentle kiss on your shoulder, he whispers, “You’re so perfect, you know that?”

“You are too.” 

“I’m always here for you, okay?”

tags: @https-yeonjun | perm.taglist: open! send an inbox to be added !

[insanelyadd]

#LetSansRest Day!

Hello everyone and welcome to year two of Let Sans Rest Day! Same as last year it's August 9th.

Before we get into some prompts, a little bit of a mission statement. Last year I said this day was for everyone who's a fan of Sans Undertale or anyone who's tired of every image they see of him being him Suffering. This is still true, but I do want to additionally address something I saw a few different people mention.

I have actually received criticism for daring to suggest that Sans not be tormented to the point of insanity, and that this day where I implore people to make realities where Sans doesn't become a creepypasta insane murderer man from the agony he is subjected to, isn't a stand against ableism like Let Papyrus Say Fuck Day is. *stares in bipolar psychosis and PTSD directly into your eyes* Obviously that's a load of shit, and even though Sans is more popular than Papyrus (I say, as a Papyrus Enjoyer) a lot of the content around Sans is very specifically about him suffering. So simply out of spite for these comments (including someone who saw last year's announcement and directly commented "No <3" on the post) I will be continuing this holiday indefinitely, just like LetPapyrusSayFuck Day. Die mad about it.

Just like how I have ADHD and relate to Papyrus and see the way the fandom treats him as the infantilization of neurodivergency like autism and ADHD, I can look at works in this fandom of Sans that demonize traits of mental illness like trauma, hallucinations, delusions, and mania. And I can say these are both bad actually. Not going to call anyone a bad person for engaging in these things, of course, that would be a bit goofy of me, I'm just saying the imagery used for these things is Very Loaded and a lot of people are mishandling them.

So anyways August 9th is the day we let Sans Undertale out of his Torment Nexus so he can:

Have lemonade at the beach or pool

Go stargazing while camping out in the woods with friends and family

Get smothered in cute baby kittens and puppies

Go to therapy and play with one of those magnetic sculptures all therapists seem to own

Take a nap on an inner-tube on a lazy river

Get to see the leaves change color for the first time

Play basketball with Papyrus

Fall asleep in a basket of freshly dried clothes

Go to a public greenhouse to look at all the different flowers on the surface

Perform stand-up for humans who all love his terrible puns

Please tag the post with #LetSansRest, #Sans, and #undertale as well as any other applicable tags for characters, relationships, etc. This day is primarily for classic Sans but it's not like I can stop you from drawing Fell Sans not being subjected to his own, personal, goth-themed Torment Nexus.

This is meant to be a day for everyone who wants Sans Undertale to go to therapy and feel better. People who want to put him in a hamster cage with plenty of things to prank for enrichment. People who want to win him one of those massive stuffed animals at the county fair.

If you want to participate please be mindful of some things:

I will be monitoring the tag to reblog things! I have ptsd and would appreciate if ships involving Papyrus or Frisk (and similar) with Sans are avoided. This is simply for my mental health and I greatly appreciate it. <3

Do Not post angst to the #LetSansRest tag. It is meant to be an angst free tag for him.

Don't worry if you can't participate on the exact day! Just like with #LetPapyrusSayFuck Day you can use the tag and post to it any day! :>

Hope you're able to participate and have fun! <3

[talistheintrovert]

as somebody who has been (and remains) suicidal, I think Love For Love's Sake was written for me specifically, in the same way The Eighth Sense was.

I have no desire to speculate over the game mechanisms or what was real and what wasn't and who his sunbae *really* was because that's not the point. It's not about that, it's about the fact that suicidal people deserve compassion. It's about the fact that small acts of kindness can change everything. It's about the crushing pain of feeling left behind by everybody in your life and rejected by the people you want love from the most.

Being a human being is hard. It's harder when you have trauma. When you're mentally ill. When you're neurodivergent. When you're queer. All of those things separate you from the people around you in small, indefinable ways, and it can and will ruin your life if you let it (and even if you don't let it, sometimes it will do it anyway). I don't know about the rest of y'all but I'm in constant danger of becoming Tae Myungha. So I have no interest in exploring whether or not the ending is "real" or what made it happen, because that's not the point.

Tae Myungha entered the game broken and alone and was given a chance to make somebody else feel less like he did and he took it because he CARED. Because he had that capacity for love and strength for other people, but he couldn't find it for himself. The game made him confront that fact until he reached a point where he could actually allow himself to want things again. To want love and companionship and to feel like he *deserved* those things, because even though it's not about whether you deserve it or not, it's difficult not to feel that way. The game, and his sunbae, over and over again just wanted him to open himself up to being taken care of after leaving a life where nobody took care of him. It's tragic and beautiful and full of hope despite it all, and yeah it's morbid, but as somebody who has been where Myungha is, it also just feels very... normal. Struggling like that. Drowning under the weight of it all. The hard part is continuing even when all you want to do is give up, but this story is trying to tell us that it's worth looking for one more bright spot, trusting one more person, believing in yourself one more time.

Learning to receive love is just as important as your willingness to give it.

THAT is the point.

[nicksbestie]

hii, I’ve never done a request before so sorry if this doesn’t make sense😭

Could you do a fic where the reader is dating Matt and is autistic and is having a bad sensory day, and like someone tries to hug them without asking and Matt gets really protective and yells at the person for making reader more overwhelmed?

Don't Touch Me - M. Sturniolo

Summary : Matt has always been the protective type, and that only doubles when he's with you.

Warnings : sensory issues, overwhelm, mentions of headaches

Word Count : 1136

Pairing : Matt Sturniolo/Reader (romantic)

A/N : this is written with a gender neutral neurodivergent reader! reminder that this account is a safe space and any hate, disrespect, or rudeness will be deleted and blocked.

You hated having sensory issues.

It caused the little things in life to be so much more than little, and a lot of it was uncontrollable or completely unpreventable. It really didn’t have any benefits for you, as you really struggled with doing a lot of anything outside of your house. Your room was specifically set up a certain way, the overhead light never really used, the temperature always set to a perfect spot, and soft, dim, fairy lights as well as some adjustable lamps decorated the walls. Matt made sure to reassure you about it every time he had to put on an extra layer because your room was kept cooler than the rest of the home. 

You were incredibly lucky to have such a loving boyfriend who was so understanding and patient when things went wrong. He always fought for you, because sometimes you couldn’t stand up for yourself. You struggled a lot with anxiety, and every now and then, Matt took on the protective role and made sure to be in your corner. It wasn’t often that he snapped at anyone, but if you were very clearly distressed and someone did something wrong, he definitely would catch an attitude with them. While you were curled up next to him, you thought about how exactly that had happened just hours prior. 

You had been on edge all day. You hadn’t slept well, causing you to have a headache, so even the gentle lighting in your room was aggravating it. Matt had noticed you wincing in pain and immediately shut them off, pulling you back into his arms and managing to convince you to go back to sleep. You’d slept for a little while longer, but eventually had gotten up and you had both made your way downstairs to eat something. Chris had made some stupid joke about Matt being awake before one in the afternoon, and they had laughed about it, which you didn’t want to admit hurt your head. 

Then, while you were eating a usually safe food for you, there had been some wrong texture in it that had made you gag, and had completely put you off of eating the rest of it. So, after not finishing all of your food, it obviously didn’t help your headache much. Matt tried to gently convince you to drink some water, but you hated the texture of it and didn’t drink very much. 

Throughout the day, your headache dissipated, but you encountered other things that caused other problems.

You and Matt had gone out, running errands, spending quality time with each other, and had eventually gone to go get ice cream. Unfortunately for you, you had forgotten your headphones, and it was just your bad luck that when you entered the shop, there was a child absolutely screaming at the top of their lungs. Matt noticed the way that your face scrunched up, trying to hide the fact that it was bothering you, and he quietly told you that he would order and you could sit at one of the little tables outside, if that helped. You nodded, leaving the shop and relaxing almost instantly once the noise was quieted. You found a small table in the warm sun, calming down and thinking that the day really was looking up. 

That was until the family with the screaming child sat down at the table next to you, and as you went to get up to go to a different one, you noticed they were all taken. You winced for what felt like the millionth time that day, hoping that Matt would come out with your ice cream soon. Luckily, he did, and he immediately noticed the kid at the table next to you. They were quieting down, but still making just enough noise to be incredibly annoying. He handed you the ice cream, offering for you and him to go walking, but you waved him off. As annoying as the kid was, they were being progressively quieter, and you’d rather just sit and eat for right now. 

Eventually they got up to leave, and the mom walked over to you both. Matt eyed her warily, not knowing what she wanted. You had your back to her, but turned slightly to hear her when she began to speak. 

“I’m sorry about my kid being so loud, I know it can be frustrating.” 

You didn’t feel like speaking, the thought of trying to form words through how frustrated you had been all day was exhausting, so Matt spoke for you.

“It’s okay, we understand.” 

Both you and Matt assumed she was going to leave now, so you turned back to facing Matt, your back subsequently facing her. But what she did next was completely unpredicted, and completely worsened your day. The woman decided to hug you from behind, and the second you felt arms wrap around you that weren’t the familiar comfort of your boyfriend, you snapped. You twisted out of her grip, standing up and moving a step away from the table so that she couldn’t reach for you again, frustrated tears filling your eyes.

“Don’t touch me!” 

Matt was off of his seat in an instant, standing next to you, offering you his hand to hold, ice cream forgotten on the table. The woman looked completely taken aback, crossing her arms over her chest with an indignant look on her face.

“Well you don’t have to be so rude.” 

You couldn’t even find the words to say to her, though you had many rushing through your mind, and upon your shocked silence, Matt took his opportunity.

“Don’t be so rude? You wanna fucking talk about rude? You just came up and put your hands on a complete stranger, and on top of that didn’t even ask if you could. Their reaction was completely valid, and you are the rude one here. Letting the fact that your kid was screaming their head off slide, regardless of if you’re apologizing or not, you don’t just grab someone. Especially someone you don’t know. Go take your kid home and leave us alone.” 

The woman looked completely stunned by Matt’s outburst, and stalked off. He turned towards you, sitting you back down next to him, and quietly asking with his gaze if he could wrap an arm around you. You let him, letting out a deep sigh and reaching for your ice cream again, eating it while comfortably sitting against your lover. He could tell you no longer wanted to be in public, so he immediately drove you both home. 

Looking over at your boyfriend who was scrolling on his phone, arm still wrapped around your shoulders as you both laid in his bed, you felt so incredibly lucky to have such an amazing person in your life.

taglist : @blahbel668 @mattsgirlfrieeend @69isabella69 @mayhem-72 @iculdstealurgf @iluvm4ttsturni0l0 @sturnioloslife @heartsforkarina @nervousrebelglitter @sturniclo @elliegrace-7 @mattsturnioloisbae @strnilo @dazsha19

~ if you'd like to be added to my taglist, click here!

~ my inbox is open, come chat!!

[brnesblogposts]

bucky barnes what a man

bucky barnes fic i had no idea what to name it but yeah

bucky barnes x gn ¡ neurodivergent reader

warnings: none! there’s no use of y/n or any gender or racial descriptors of any kind so this can be read by anyone! if i’ve made any mistakes please let me know! but this is safe to read no matter your identity :)

——————————————————————

Bucky was sat on the couch opposite you glaring broodingly into the distance, you stared back at him hoping to catch his attention but didn’t have any luck as he continued to have the thousand yard stare, he was in his head most likely which is not good.

“What’s up sunshine?” You broke the silence, Bucky simply shrugged and then got up and walked away. You couldn’t figure out what was wrong, you wanted to be able to help. Quickly getting up and catching up with him you ask “what’s got your panties in a twist?” To which he says “it’s nothing” you don’t buy it — “are you sure” furrowing your brows, but you know Bucky isn’t one to talk about his feelings unless it’s with his therapist so your hopes aren’t held high that he’ll tell you what’s bothering him.

Placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder you say “If you change your mind and want to talk about it, you know where to find me.” Your words sincere, he nods and responds with a quiet “I know” before wondering off again. After that you go about your day and are sure Bucky goes about his and your paths don’t cross again. As you’re on your way to your room you pass Natasha, “hey, Nat?” Your voice quiet “You okay, sweetheart?” She scans your features, “i’m okay” you reassure her “do you know what’s up with Buck?” Natasha informs you that “he’s in a mood today” and you nod understandingly, “just give him some space and i’m sure he’ll be okay, he’ll come round eventually.” She smiles and strokes your cheek before excusing herself and you continue to your room.

——

Lego batman is playing on your tv while you lay on your bed both laughing at the movie but also thinking about Bucky and hoping he’s okay. A faint knock on your door catches your attention as you hear a familiar voice say your name on the other side “Bucky?” You respond and a few moments later he’s opening your door and walking into your room. There’s a look of worry on his face as he speaks “Can I talk to you for a second?” You nod and pat the place next to you on your bed signalling Bucky to sit, which he does.

Bucky takes a deep breath “I just want to apologise for being distant and a moody broody ass,” he looks down at your comforter and he speaks, you reach out and put your hand over his “That’s okay, we all have our days.” He looks up now to see a soft reassuring smile gracing your face “Thanks, I just had a bit of a rough day but i’ll be alright, i’m okay.” He is reassuring you all of a sudden and you just want to hug him, you meet his eyes for a couple of seconds before looking down at where your hand covers his;

“You don't need to lie to me, it's okay to not be okay. You of all people have every right to feel the way you do, with everything you've been through. You're a survivor and a warrior and it's normal to have rough days. There's no need to apologise for feeling down, your feelings are valid” You squeeze his hand. You look up a little to see he’s now smiling softly “thank you. It’s just I had a few flashbacks to my time at HYDRA, it’s kind of hard to shake those feelings that arise when i’m reminded of that time in my life.” He glares at the ground as he gets what has been bugging him off of his chest, “sorry to hear that Buck.” You’re squeezing his hand again “hey do you want to hang out and watch the rest of this movie with me?” He takes a second before nodding as you shuffle along your bed to allow him to lay down, he does so and you automatically nuzzle into him and he wraps his arms around you while leaning his chin on your head.

“You ever seen lego batman?” You ask from your place beside him he announces“I have not.” At this you sit up and gasp “Your life is about to change for the better.” He laughs at your dramatics and motions for you to lay back down “I’m excited now so hurry up and press play!” He teases.

Everytime he hears you laugh at the movie a warmth spreads in his chest and he can’t help but smile and laugh along with you, he can see why you like this movie it’s right up your alley. You absentmindedly start playing with the hem of his shirt, using it to stim, at this Bucky smiles admirably at you “You’re cute when you stim” He practically whispers not wanting to disrupt the movie too much. He feels you move to hide your face in his side and can’t help but smile, he plays with your hair “Nothing to be embarrassed about, doll, it’s cute” He states matter-o-factly placing a kiss on the top of your head. You whisper a thanks and continue to hide as a blush takes over your face “I love you, you know that right?” He’s still playing with you hair until you sit up a little “I love you too, Buck” You smile. Nuzzling back into his side a thought pops into your head “Hey, Buck?” You ask inquisitively “Yeah, dollface?” He responds enthusiastically “would you still love me if I was a worm?” You’re playing with the hem of his shirt again as a light laugh escapes him “Yeah,” he kisses your temple and you smile “why?” He asks “just curious” you shrug. Bucky smiles again “I love you whether you're a worm, or a squirrel, or even if you're an inanimate brick.” At this a grin breaks out on your face as you sit up and respond “as i would with you!” He cups your face “awww thanks, gorgeous,” this time his thumb is stroking your cheek as his hand cups your jaw so you can’t hide the blush that creeps up your neck, Bucky loves making you flustered and only smirks at your reaction. You slap his hand away and lightheartedly say “Shut up” which only earns you a whole hearted laugh from the man next to you as he puts his arm out for you to lay back down.

A little while later you let out a yawn and burrow into Bucky even further, he’s like a human furnace. He moves the hair out of your face with his cool metal hand “you tired, angel?” You can only mumble an “Mhmm” as speaking would be too much energy, “go to sleep then, sweetheart. i’ll be right here when you wake up” Once again a kiss is placed on your forehead as sleep takes over and Bucky watches you for a few moments smiling at your soft features and the little sounds you make as you sleep before he closes his eyes too.

————————————————————-

reblogs appreciated !