#immunity health

[ikiprian]

Ghost Kitchen (brought to you by criminal entrepreneur, Red Hood)

Danny’s got the easiest job in Gotham.

He works as a fry cook at a shoddily-run, independent burger joint. Hardly anyone comes in, despite prices being criminally low, and portions insanely large, and while the manager looks like the average tough-as-nails ex-con, he lets Danny mess around in the kitchen whenever the place is empty. (Which is often. This place has to be the city’s hidden gem or something!)

Mr. Manager’s the only one ever there with Danny, except for sometimes when his buddies come over to smoke and play cards. Danny would find it shady, except part of his job is not to ask questions. Literally, he was told during the interview.

(It was a weird interview. Why would they need to hire someone who’s been in a gunfight before? Like, he has, but Gotham’s idea of “hirable qualities” is so bizarre.)

So instead he whips up some killer burgers with the frozen ingredients, and basks in the praise as the guys tell him he shouldn’t have, he does too much for this joint, ain’t that friendly!

Now, Danny’s a chef on the newer side. As a teen he’d preferred the look of Nasty Burger over anything with Michelin stars, and he only really took up cooking after Jazz moved out for college. But just like ecto-exposure used to turn the groceries sentient, Danny’s low-level ecto signature imbues all his food with something historically haunted Gothamites just love! And Danny’s never been one to half-ass a job when it makes people happy.

With fresher produce, real meat, Danny’s sure he can take his dishes to the next level. It takes a couple months of badgering, but his manager finally agrees to contact the mysterious store owner, who keeps the place going, despite profits Danny knows have to be in the red.

Danny spends the morning prepping. He pours his heart into his food, eager to impress. The big boss will be here soon, and he wants to prove that despite the dangerous location, this place has real potential!

It isn’t until the Red Hood shows up that Danny realizes he’s been working for a money laundering scheme.

[violetsandshrikes]

this poor woman ended up in hospital because she ate cayenne + cinnamon coated orange (unpeeled) because there’s a health and wellness influencer with millions of views who recommends it for digestion - she burned her oesophagus

i always saw a few really good other additions of similar things on the comments

please be so, so careful taking advice from these people online, as many of them are not formally trained or educated, brand ambassadors, deep in pseudoscientific rabbit holes and unfortunately, there are many out there who struggle with disordered eating habits

(not mentioned here but another one worth noting: i have personally known people who have burned their oesophagus with viral apple cider vinegar shots and drinks. don’t do that. a burned oesophagus is not fun)

[reasonsforhope]

"A clinical trial studying severe allergic reactions in the U.K. is being called “life-transforming.”

Five United Kingdom National Health Service (NHS) hospitals are participating in the £2.5 million ($3.2 million) trial to help patients live with their food allergies.

The study is being funded by the Natasha Allergy Research Foundation, Sky News reported. The foundation was formed in the memory of Natasha Ednan-Laperouse, who died in 2016 after eating a baguette that had sesame in it...

The trial is studying clinical oral immunotherapy treatments in which patients are given small doses of the food to which they are allergic to build up their tolerance. The food is given under medical supervision by trained staff, The Telegraph reported.

The study has 139 people participating who have allergies to peanuts or cow’s milk. They range in age from 2 to 23 years old, the BBC reported.

The Food Standards Agency said 2 million people in the U.K. have a diagnosed food allergy. In the U.S., about 5.5. million children have a food allergy, the National Institutes of Health reported.

One 11-year-old who was diagnosed with a severe peanut allergy when he was an infant can now eat six peanuts.

A 5-year-old with a milk allergy can drink 120 ml of milk every day and can enjoy a daily hot chocolate, the BBC reported.

“To have a patient who has had anaphylaxis [Note: Anaphylaxis is an allergic reaction so severe that it's potentially fatal without immediate treatment. It is very common with peanut allergies in particular. x] to 4mls of milk to then tolerate 90mls within six to eight months is nothing less than a miracle,” Sibel Donmez-Ajtai, a pediatric allergy consultant and principal investigator at Sheffield Children’s NHS Foundation Trust, said, according to Sky News.

The final results of the study are expected to be released in 2027.

Similar studies have been conducted in the U.S. To find one, visit FoodAllergy.org.

Earlier this year, the NIH released the findings of a study of an antibody treatment that would help children consume allergy triggers safely."

-via WHIO 7 Local News, May 8, 2024

[kindnessoverperfection]

Please, if you can, take a moment to read and share this because I feel like I'm screaming underwater.

NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) stigma is rampant right now, and seems to be getting progressively worse. Everyone is using it as a buzzword in the worst ways possible, spreading misinformation and hatred against a real disorder.

I could go on a long time about how this happened, why it's factually incorrect (and what the disorder actually IS), why it's harmful, and the changes I'd like to see. But to keep this concise, I'll simply link to a few posts under the cut for further reading.

The point of this post is a plea. Please help stop the spread of stigma. Even in mental health communities, even around others with personality disorders, in neurodivergent "safe" spaces, other communities I thought people would be supportive in (e.g. trans support groups, progressive spaces in general), it keeps coming up. So I'm willing to bet that a lot of people on this site need to see this.

Because it's so hard to exist in this world.

My disorder already makes me feel as if I'm worthless and unlovable, like there's something inherently wrong and damaged about me. And it's so much harder to fight that and heal when my daily life consists of:

Laughing and spending time with my friends, doing my utmost best to connect and stay present and focused on them, trying to let my guards down and be real and believe I'm lovable- when suddenly they throw out the word "narcissist" to describe horrible people or someone they hate, or the conversation turns to how evil "people with narcissistic personality disorder" are. (Seriously, you don't know which of your friends might have NPD and feels like shit when you say those things & now knows that you'd hate them if you knew.)

Trying to look up "mental health positivity for people with npd", "mental health positivity cluster bs", only to find a) none of that, and b) more of the same old vile shit that makes me feel terrible about myself.

Having a hard time (which is constant at this point) and trying to look up resources for myself, only to again, find the same stigma. And no resources.

Not having any clue how to help myself, because even the mental health field is spitting so much vitriol at people with DISORDERS (who they're supposed to be helping!) that there's no solid research or therapy programs for people like me.

Losing close friends when they find out, despite us having had a good relationship before, and them KNOWING me and knowing that I'm not like the trending image of pwNPD. Because now they only see me through the lens of stigma and misinformation.

Hearing the same stigma come up literally wherever I go. Clubs. Meetings. Any online space. At the bus stop. At the mall. At a restaurant. At work. Buzzword of the year that everyone loooves loudly throwing around with their friends or over the phone. Feels awesome for me, makes my day so much better/s

I could go on for a long time, but I'm scared no one will read/rb this if it gets too much longer.

So please. Stop using the word "narcissist" as a synonym for "abusive".

Stop bringing up people you hate who you believe to have NPD because of a stigmatizing article full of misinformation whenever someone with actual NPD opens their mouth. (Imagine if people did that with any other disorder! "Hey, I'm autistic." "Oh... my old roommate screamed at me whenever I made noise around him, and didn't understand my needs, which seems like sensory overload and difficulty with social cues. He was definitely autistic. But as long as you're self-aware and always restraining your innate desire to be an abusive asshole, you're okay I guess, maybe." ...See how offensive and ignorant that is?)

Stop preventing healthcare for people with a disorder just because it's trendy to use us as a scapegoat.

If you got this far, thank you for reading, and please share this if you can. Further reading is under the cut.

NPD Criteria, re-written by someone who actually has NPD

Stigma in the DSM

Common perception of the DSM criteria vs how someone may actually experience them (Keep in mind that this is the way I personally experience these symptoms, and that presentation can vary a lot between individuals)

"Idk, the stigma is right though, because I've known a lot of people with NPD who are jerks, so I'm going to continue to support the blockage of treatment for this condition."

(All of these were written by me, because I didn't want to link to other folks' posts without permission, but if you want to add your own links in reblogs or replies please feel free <3)

[aropride]

also don't let ur friends/society/tumblr posts/whatever convince u to start smoking or drinking or whatever if u don't want to. there are health risks there are social and financial aspects to consider and it's totally fine and normal to not want to. there's no moral aspect to it you can drink and do drugs or whatever if u want and that's chill but u should know what ur doing and do research and if u decide u dont want to that's chill and anyone who tries to shame u for it can go fuck themselves

[bluestation]

🌡⁉️

[the-forestry-system]

you're immune from ALL reblog bait now

[spookyfishoperalamp]

Can we talk about how Tim loses his spleen, and the only drawback that people put on him is his immune system?

Cause the spleen doesn't only help the immune system, it can also act as a reserve blood bank cause I think that'll be a pretty neat thing to write about.

Just imagine, Tim bleeding out from a wound, and the batfam doesn't know that he's lost his spleen, so they think he has around 15 more minutes, but in reality, he only has say 3 before he goes into shock. And that's how they find out he doesn't have a spleen.

The spleen also helps do quality control on red blood cells, the way it does this is that the red blood cells have to go through multiple narrow passages, which healthy blood cells can go through easily but the old and deformed ones can't.

So, in this scenario, you can have Tim get a blood disease, and he just keeps getting worse until they take him either to the hospital or to Dr Leslie.

[awesomecooperlove]

🧬💉⚰️

[my-midlife-crisis]

Consider, If...

Then so is...

In a way... it's the same way.

People need the healthcare that they need.

VOTE! Protect women's rights. Protect Trans kids needs.

[skyscrapergods]

if you ever want to dip your toes into the more creepy side, in the episode "a health of information" a disease called swamp fever apparently turns living ponies into trees!! it always freaked me out, and since it was in the later seasons, it just wasn't developed upon (of course :P) there's a screenshot of one of the doctor ponies holding up a book that shows the cycle of transformation-- the stage where they've still got limb-like roots is so so creepy!!

HEY WHAT???? HEY WHAT. WHAT THE HECK IS THIS

[reasonsforhope]

"Since it was first identified in 1983, HIV has infected more than 85 million people and caused some 40 million deaths worldwide.

While medication known as pre-exposure prophylaxis, or PrEP, can significantly reduce the risk of getting HIV, it has to be taken every day to be effective. A vaccine to provide lasting protection has eluded researchers for decades. Now, there may finally be a viable strategy for making one.

An experimental vaccine developed at Duke University triggered an elusive type of broadly neutralizing antibody in a small group of people enrolled in a 2019 clinical trial. The findings were published today [May 17, 2024] in the scientific journal Cell.

“This is one of the most pivotal studies in the HIV vaccine field to date,” says Glenda Gray, an HIV expert and the president and CEO of the South African Medical Research Council, who was not involved in the study.

A few years ago, a team from Scripps Research and the International AIDS Vaccine Initiative (IAVI) showed that it was possible to stimulate the precursor cells needed to make these rare antibodies in people. The Duke study goes a step further to generate these antibodies, albeit at low levels.

“This is a scientific feat and gives the field great hope that one can construct an HIV vaccine regimen that directs the immune response along a path that is required for protection,” Gray says.

-via WIRED, May 17, 2024. Article continues below.

Vaccines work by training the immune system to recognize a virus or other pathogen. They introduce something that looks like the virus—a piece of it, for example, or a weakened version of it—and by doing so, spur the body’s B cells into producing protective antibodies against it. Those antibodies stick around so that when a person later encounters the real virus, the immune system remembers and is poised to attack.

While researchers were able to produce Covid-19 vaccines in a matter of months, creating a vaccine against HIV has proven much more challenging. The problem is the unique nature of the virus. HIV mutates rapidly, meaning it can quickly outmaneuver immune defenses. It also integrates into the human genome within a few days of exposure, hiding out from the immune system.

“Parts of the virus look like our own cells, and we don’t like to make antibodies against our own selves,” says Barton Haynes, director of the Duke Human Vaccine Institute and one of the authors on the paper.

The particular antibodies that researchers are interested in are known as broadly neutralizing antibodies, which can recognize and block different versions of the virus. Because of HIV’s shape-shifting nature, there are two main types of HIV and each has several strains. An effective vaccine will need to target many of them.

Some HIV-infected individuals generate broadly neutralizing antibodies, although it often takes years of living with HIV to do so, Haynes says. Even then, people don’t make enough of them to fight off the virus. These special antibodies are made by unusual B cells that are loaded with mutations they’ve acquired over time in reaction to the virus changing inside the body. “These are weird antibodies,” Haynes says. “The body doesn’t make them easily.”

Haynes and his colleagues aimed to speed up that process in healthy, HIV-negative people. Their vaccine uses synthetic molecules that mimic a part of HIV’s outer coat, or envelope, called the membrane proximal external region. This area remains stable even as the virus mutates. Antibodies against this region can block many circulating strains of HIV.

The trial enrolled 20 healthy participants who were HIV-negative. Of those, 15 people received two of four planned doses of the investigational vaccine, and five received three doses. The trial was halted when one participant experienced an allergic reaction that was not life-threatening. The team found that the reaction was likely due to an additive in the vaccine, which they plan to remove in future testing.

Still, they found that two doses of the vaccine were enough to induce low levels of broadly neutralizing antibodies within a few weeks. Notably, B cells seemed to remain in a state of development to allow them to continue acquiring mutations, so they could evolve along with the virus. Researchers tested the antibodies on HIV samples in the lab and found that they were able to neutralize between 15 and 35 percent of them.

Jeffrey Laurence, a scientific consultant at the Foundation for AIDS Research (amfAR) and a professor of medicine at Weill Cornell Medical College, says the findings represent a step forward, but that challenges remain. “It outlines a path for vaccine development, but there’s a lot of work that needs to be done,” he says.

For one, he says, a vaccine would need to generate antibody levels that are significantly higher and able to neutralize with greater efficacy. He also says a one-dose vaccine would be ideal. “If you’re ever going to have a vaccine that’s helpful to the world, you’re going to need one dose,” he says.

Targeting more regions of the virus envelope could produce a more robust response. Haynes says the next step is designing a vaccine with at least three components, all aimed at distinct regions of the virus. The goal is to guide the B cells to become much stronger neutralizers, Haynes says. “We’re going to move forward and build on what we have learned.”

-via WIRED, May 17, 2024

[j-eryewrites]

Look for the Light

The final part of A Sinner's Redemption

SERIES MASTER LIST | MAIN MASTER LIST

Previous

Word Count: ~9.8k

Author's Note: Agh, I'm honestly crying. It's all too bittersweet. I started this fic over a year ago, and now it's over. I'm happy with how it ended and I'm glad you were all there along for the ride. Thank you for all your support for "A Sinner's Redemption". I hope you all enjoy the conclusion to Ellie, Joel, and Piper's story.

- With much love, the author.

Warnings: Canon typical violence, spoilers for the last episode and game, Joel goes full momma bear, mentions of death, suicidal ideation, mental health, explicit language, major angst and hurt (with comfort), deceit and lies, gun violence, mentions of gore, description of gore, Joel kills a whole bunch of people, mentions of surgery and medical procedures, mentions of infected, descriptions of child birth, mentions of trauma and coping mechanisms, mentions of injuries and scars (let me know if I missed anything)

Look for the Light (the Final Chapter)

Piper seemed to hit every low branch as she was dragged along. The warm hand holding hers was sweaty. Her mother’s long fingers tightened its hold.

“Ow, mommy,” Piper whined. She looked up at her mom, who quickly apologized, fighting off a painful groan.

“Baby, let’s keep going. Come on.” Anna, the girl’s mom, tugged her child along. A distant howl made her blood run cold. Everything was going wrong. Contractions constricted her body’s muscles. A runner was after them.  She’d been running for who knows how long with Piper in tow. Despite the overwhelming surge of fear, Anna knew one thing. She had to keep her sweet girl safe. Both of them, now that the other one was fighting to come out into the world. 

“Mommy, I-“

Anna pulled Piper along. “I know, sweet girl. I know. Once we get to the house, we’ll be safe. I promise.” 

Heavy huffs of breath fall from Anna’s mouth. The pains were getting worse. She couldn’t keep the sound in—the sound the monster used to track them. 

“Fuck,” Anna cried, using her free hand to clutch her round stomach. 

“Mommy?” Piper peered up at Anna with worried eyes.

Taking a deep breath, Anna softly smiled down at her daughter. “Mommy’s okay, Pipes. Mommy’s okay.” She knew Piper didn’t believe her. Three-year-olds were brilliant, especially when it came to their mothers. 

“Look, Pipes.” Anna pointed to the tall gray house up ahead. “We’re here.”

Anna hastily waddled her and Piper along into the house. The door swung open. “It’s me!” Anna announced. No one answered. Frantically, she looked around. “Anyone?!”

“Mommy?” 

“Not now, sweetie.” A screech pierced the air. “Shit!” Anna cursed, pulling Piper up the stairs and into the farthest room. “In here, sweetie.” 

Letting go of her daughter’s hand, Anna closed the door, locked it, and dragged a chair to barricade the room. 

“Mommy?” Piper whispered. Her tiny finger pointed to the puddle of water underneath Anna’s legs. 

“Oh…” Anna grasped her stomach. “Sweetie,” Anna winced. “Help mommy sit down.” 

Piper ran to her mom’s side, reaching for her hand. With a thump, Anna collapsed against the floor. Gently, she wiped some of the grime off of Piper’s face. 

“I love you; you know that, right?” Anna asked. Piper nodded.

Suddenly, glass broke. It came from downstairs. Anna bit her lip to stifle her groan. “Baby, go hide in-,” Anna howled in pain. “Go hide.”

The chair against the door thumped. Growls seeped through the cracks. It found them. 

“Piper! Go-“

The door flung open. The infected charged into the room. Its sights were set on Anna’s little girl. Except it didn’t attack Piper. With a swing, the girl was tossed to the side. The infected’s actual target was revealed as it lunged at Anna. 

Piper screamed, and Anna fought. With a switchblade, she swiped at the monster, fighting it off as her body fought to push a baby out. The creature gnashed its teeth, searching for something to bite. The rotten bones found home in Anna’s thigh. She cried out in pain, bringing down the blade into the Infected. She grunted with each slice of her weapon until it dropped dead. 

A new cry filled the air. It was the baby. 

“Oh…oh…” Anna cooed, lifting her baby. She was tiny. Her frail arms flailed in the air. Her dark eyes crinkled open. 

“Mommy?” Piper’s voice called to her mom.

Anna glanced up. “Piper, come meet your sister.” 

Piper tip-toed over to her mom and new baby sister. 

“Hi…hey…” Anna cooed. She turned the baby over to Piper. The young girl brought her face as close as possible to her new sister. 

“She looks funny,” Piper muttered. 

The baby started to cry again. Anna held her close. “Did I make her cry?” Piper sniffled. Anna shook her head and chuckled. 

“No, sweet girl. Babies just cry.” Then Anna turned to the baby.  “Yeah, you tell ’em. You fuckin’ tell ’em, Ellie.”

“Hi Ellie…” Piper whispered. Baby Ellie grew quiet. Her bright, wide eyes looked over at her mom and sister. “I’m your big sister.”

“Do you want to hold her, Pipes?” Piper nodded. With her tiny arms, Piper held Ellie close. 

“Hold her head like this, and-“ Anna adjusted Piper’s arms. “Just like that.” Anna sank deeper into the wall. Her eyes watched over her daughters, the view growing blurry. 

“Yeah, it’s okay…” Anna whispered to herself. The pain in the thigh crawled its way around her body. She could feel the infection spread. 

“Piper,” Anna said. “Can you take your sister and sit in the corner over there?” Piper looked confused but did as her mother said. 

Anna bit back a growl. “Fuck,” she quietly cursed. She prayed that Marlene and the others would be back soon. She prayed the last thing her daughters would see was their mother become a monster. 

“It’s okay.” 

When Anna opened her eyes next, crickets began to chirp outside. Silently, she scolded herself for closing her eyes. Beside her, Piper sat, curled up around her baby sister, the two of them fast asleep. Anna lovingly smiled even if Piper had left the corner. 

Taking a hand, she began to run her fingers through Piper’s hair. Her voice croaked but quickly smoothed out as she sang to her baby girls. 

♪ Hold me ♪

♪ Close to your heart ♪

♪ Touch me ♪

♪ Give all your love to me. ♪

“Anna?” Marlene’s voice called out. Anna sat up straighter as the door to the room creaked open. Bright white lights momentarily blinded her. 

“Oh god,” Marlene cursed, noticing the bite on Anna’s thigh. 

With a calm voice, Anna looked up at her friend. “It’s not your fault.”

“We were delayed getting out of the zone. I’m so-“

“They’re hungry,” Anna said, looking down at her girls. “The baby needs to be fed, and I…I didn’t wanna nurse her.” Marlene furrowed her brows in skepticism. “I cut it before I was bit, and it never got to Piper. Marlene,” Anna begged.”Before.”

Sighing, Marlene lowered her gun and approached Anna. Her hands gently reached for the baby in Piper’s arms. Unconsciously, the young girl’s grip tightened around her sister. 

“Sweet girl,” Anna whispered, rubbing her finger gently up and down her daughter’s nose. “Piper, I need you to wake up.”  Piper stirred and snuggled deeper into her mother’s side. “Baby, please.” Piper awoke. Bringing her hands to the sides of Piper’s face, Anna smiled. Her eyes fought back tears. “There’s my sweet girl.”

“Mommy?” Piper said groggily. 

“Yeah, it’s mommy. I need you to promise me something, Piper. Can you do that for mommy?” Piper nodded. “Can you promise to watch over your sister?” Again, Piper nodded, wiping the sleep away. “I need you to be a big girl and a big sister.” Tears began to flow out of Anna’s eyes. “I need you to promise me you’ll always be with her. Piper and Ellie forever. Okay?” 

“Mommy, why are you crying?” Piper’s hand reached up to her mom’s face. Her tiny fingers wiped away tears. Anna struggled to peel off her daughter’s hands. 

“Piper, remember Aunty Marlene? She’s gonna take you and Ellie to a new home.”

“Where are you gonna go, mommy?” Piper asked, and Anna wanted to break in two. 

“I want you to…” Anna’s voice trembled as she looked at Marlene. “…take them with you to Boston… find someone to bring them up, and make sure that they’re safe.” 

“I can’t do that,” Marlene breathed, but Anna ignored her.

“And I want you to give her this.” Anna handed over a small switchblade. 

“Anna.”

“Her name is Ellie,” Anna explained. 

“I can’t,” Marlene sternly said.

“How long have we known each other?” Anna asked. Her eyes held strength even as her mind fought the monster crawling within. 

“Our whole lives,” Marlene answered.

“So you pick her up right now…take Piper, and then you kill me.”

“I can’t kill you.”

“Please, please, please.” Anna cried as Marlene stepped away with her daughters in tow. “Please!”

“Mommy?!” Piper began to cry, seeing her mother so distressed. 

Anna groaned as a growl grew from her chest. It was coming—the monster. 

“Marlene!” Anna screamed. Tears poured freely from her face. 

“Mommy!” Piper flailed around as Marlene drew her back from her mom. “Mommy!!”

Suddenly, Marlene’s hand withdrew and was replaced by another. 

“Here,” Marlene instructed the Firefly. “Hold her head… There you go.” Ellie cooed in the man’s arms. “Cover her ears.” Then she crouched down to Piper. “Cover your ears for me, Piper.” 

Piper shook her head. Her only thought was her mother. “Mommy!” She cried. Anna’s sobs followed the sound. 

Marlene clenched her jaw and stood up. The gun felt heavy in her hand as she marched back into the room. She had to make it quick. Anna nodded and closed her eyes. Thoughts of her daughters flashed before her as the bullet tore through her skull. 

Piper’s ears rang. Ellie cried, and her sister screamed. Piper didn’t stop screaming for her mother until sleep overcame her petite body. Even when she woke up, she still cried for Anna. But she’d never come. Instead, Piper clung to her baby sister. Although memories faded with time, one thing remained clear. Piper promised. It was her and Ellie. Sisters forever. 

꧁_____________꧂

A smile beamed from Joel’s face at his surprise find. Pulling himself away from the car, he called out to his girls. There was no response. He sighed. 

“Ellie! Piper!”

No reaction. Joel walked closer to the truck the girls sat on. Their eyes glazed over, stuck in their own heads. 

“Girls!” 

Piper blinked, her ears ringing as Joel’s voice called out to her. With a gentle nudge of her elbow, she pulled Ellie out of her trance. 

“D’ya hear me?” Joel asked the girls. 

“No…,” Ellie shook her head. “What?”

“Well,” Joel began, “found this in there. Beefaroni. Chef Boyardee.” He proudly grinned at them. 

“Oh, cool,” they muttered at the same time. Their postures shrank back down. 

“And have you ever played this?” Joel blurted, regaining the girl’s attention. “Boggle? It’s a word game.”

The girls shook their heads. 

“Well, if you wanna beat me at somethin’, it would be this.” Ellie’s ears perked up at Joel’s words, but she didn’t speak. Neither of them did. 

With each moment of silence, Joel felt his heart tear in smaller and smaller pieces. “Well, all right then. We’re gettin’ close.” He strolled over to the girls, packing away his finds. 

“Mm-hmm,” Ellie hummed. 

“Hospital that way.” Joel pointed over their shoulders. “May be the one we’re lookin’ for.”

“Got it,” Ellie muttered, hopping off the back of the truck. 

Slowly, Piper placed her feet on the ground. Her hands clutched tightly to the metal of the vehicle. Joel’s eyes flashed with pity, looking at the teen. 

Scars had littered her body. The biggest one was found on her face like a crevice carved by tears from her now pale eye. She couldn’t see out of it anymore. A consequence Joel blamed himself for. Joel had done his best to help her heal, but it was never enough to stave off the bouts of pain that would arise from time to time. He knew even more scars were hiding deeper under her skin—for both of them.

“Take this for me?” Joel asked Piper, holding up his gun. She held it as Joel slung the backpack over his shoulder. “Thanks.” Piper nodded, brushing her hair behind her ears. 

It had grown out since they’d left Jackson. Her dark curls were tucked beneath her chin. The length helped hide some of the more minor scars that lined her face. 

“They had a guitar in that RV,” Joel announced as they passed an abandoned RV on the highway. The girls nodded with false amusement. “It was all smashed up but got me thinkin’, maybe I should find one. I haven’t played in forever.” Joel turned to look behind him at Ellie and Piper. “In fact, I was thinkin’ maybe I could teach you two. I bet you guys be great at it. Maybe make our own little band.” A slight chuckle left Joel’s mouth as he thought about a band of the three of them plucking away at guitars. “Do you two wanna learn how to play guitar?”

Piper shrugged before tripping over some rubble. Thankfully, she caught herself before falling to the ground. 

“Ellie?” Joel muttered. 

“Hm?” Ellie’s brain quickly recovered. “Oh, yeah. That’d be great. A little guitar band.”

Joel smiled at his girls. His grin was big enough for the three of them when neither of his girls felt like smiling. 

The birds chirped louder and louder as they entered Salt Lake City. Even in late spring, the city emitted a ghastly heat. 

“Okay, so this is what I’m thinking…” Joel began, wiping sweat from his forehead.  

“Cut through that building to get around that stuff, find the skyscraper, go up and look around,” Ellie vacantly finished.

Joel’s eyes widened in surprise, but he quickly collected himself. “Uhh, actually, this time, I was thinkin’ we blast our way through that rubble.” The girls looked up at him with expressions of pure confusion. “I found some dynamite in that RV back there,” Joel said, fighting off a telling smile. 

“Really?” The girls cocked their brows. 

“No,” Joel teased. The smile exploded on his face. “So we’re gonna cut through that building, find a skyscraper, go up and look around. But I had you goin’, didn’t I?”

Piper rolled her eyes and bit back a smile. Ellie scoffed and continued on walking. 

“Look at this place,” Joel muttered, peeking around the abandoned construction site. “Talk about bad luck.” Ellie sent him a questioning look, and Joel answered. “Military drops bombs… not one of them hits the building you’re trying to demolish.” 

“No way up,” Piper mumbled. Joel peered around, discovering she was right. Spotting the edges of a ladder above, Joel turned to the girls. 

“I get you two up there. You guys can drop that ladder down; maybe we go through that way,” Joel proposed. “Come on. I’ll give you a boost.” 

Piper stepped up. Her hand clutched onto Joel’s shoulder as he hoisted her up. He could feel her legs shaking in hesitation as she reached for the edge. Suddenly, her legs buckled beneath her. 

“You okay?” Joel asked. 

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just my leg.” Piper’s hand rubbed the area where she got shot. “Get Ellie to do it.”

“Alright.” Joel nodded. “Ellie?” The girl didn’t answer him. “Ellie?”

“Els!” Piper yelled. 

“What?” Ellie said, whirling around. Her attention had been taken away from the flapping construction sheet. 

“You alright?” Joel questioned. “It’s just you kinda seem extra quiet today, so.”

“Oh… I’m sorry,” Ellie apologized.

“No, it’s fine,” Joel reassured her. “Did you hear what I…”

“Yeah, boost. Got it.” 

Marching over to Joel, Ellie copied Piper’s earlier motions.

“One… two, up.” Ellie stood up tall and reached for the edge. A grunt escaped her mouth as she pulled herself up. The ladder clattered as Ellie slid it down to Joel. 

“Ya got it?” Ellie asked. 

“Yeah,” Joel huffed, trying to latch onto the ladder. Suddenly, the ladder dropped. The metal clambered to the floor. Joel narrowly dodged the object. 

“God damn it, Ellie!” Joel cursed and picked up the ladder. “Shit.”

“You stay there!” He instructed Ellie. 

She didn’t listen. Joel heard her voice echo off the walls of the building as she moved away from the ledge. “You gotta see this!” She exclaimed with excitement. 

“Ellie?!” Joel yelled. Climbing up the ladder. Upon reaching the top, he helped Piper come to her feet before they ran after Ellie. 

“Up here!” Ellie announced. 

“Ellie!” Joel reprimanded. 

“C’mon!” He could practically hear the young girl jumping up and down with joy. “C’mon, slow pokes.”

“Just wait. God damn it,” Joel grumbled. His knees ached as he trekked up the stairs and after Ellie. When he got to the top, his breath stilled. 

His feet didn’t move. He stood there watching Ellie admire a giraffe. Piper stopped beside him, catching her breath before she approached her sister and the animal. Joe wanted to freeze time as the girls stared in awe at the peaceful creature. But time didn’t work like that. 

Slowly, Joel stepped forward. 

“Don’t scare it,” Ellie whispered. 

“I won’t.”

His hands deftly snapped some leaves off the tree the animal was munching on. He passed the leaves to his girls. 

“What are you doing?” Ellie asked, taking the leaves.

“It’s all right.” Then Joel stuck out his hand, feeding the giraffe. He raised his brows and motioned for the girls to do the same. “Come here, hurry up. Come on.”

Ellie was the first to step up. Hesitantly, she stuck out her hand as far away as she could from her body. The giraffe sniffed the leaves before opening its mouth to munch on them. Its dark tongue licked around Ellie’s hand. Giggles erupted from the girl’s mouth.

“Ellie, give me a try,” Piper interjected, sticking her hand of leaves to the creature. The giraffe moved from Ellie’s hand to Piper’s and began to feast. Disgust and amusement contorted on the teen’s face. 

“God, it’s wet and it tickles.” Piper felt a shiver go down her spine. Ellie laughed and teased her sister. 

Scratch what he thought earlier. If Joel could freeze time, he’d do it now. His girls were happy. God, he hadn’t heard them laugh in so long. It was better than any music he’d ever heard in his life. 

“So fucking cool,” Ellie muttered at the giraffe. Before the girls knew it, their hands were empty of leaves, and the giraffe had pulled back. Its lanky legs were taking it away. 

“Aw, where’s she going?” Ellie hopped back before entering a sprint, determined to follow the giraffe. “Come on, come on, come on, come on!”

Piper skipped after her, eager to spend longer with the animal. 

“Okay,” Joel chuckled, chasing after his girls.

When he finally reached them, Joel couldn’t help but feel an overwhelming sense of deja vu. There, Ellie and Piper stood, gazing out across a city. The sunlight reflected off the shattered windows of the skyline. Nature overcame the city. Vines and trees ensnared everything in sight.

“So… is it everything ya hoped for?” Joel repeated himself. 

Ellie grinned. “It’s got its ups and downs… but you can’t deny that view.” 

Joel laughed and then joined them. The view was lovely. His eyes scanned the scene and froze on what appeared to be a hospital. 

“Look,” he turned to Ellie and Piper. “I don’t know exactly where this hospital is…”

“Yeah, we’ll find it.” Ellie didn’t remove her gaze from the view. 

“Sure. It’s just…” Joel trailed off, thinking of his following words. “Maybe there’s nothin’ bad out there, but so far, there’s always been somethin’ bad out there.” 

“We’re still here, though.” Ellie was facing him now. 

“I know. I’m only saying there’s risk.” Taking a deep breath, Joel made sure he had both girls' full attention. “We don’t have to do this. I just… I want you to know that.” 

Piper froze. All of a sudden, she felt like she was on fire. Did she want to do this? She knew what awaited her and Ellie. Sick boiled in her stomach, and Piper wished she hadn’t eaten anything that day. 

“What do you mean? What else are we supposed to do?” Ellie questioned. 

“Nothin’. We just go back to Tommy’s.” Piper could tell it was all he wanted to do by the way Joel spoke. “We forget about the whole damn thing.”

Ellie shook her head. “After all we’ve been through… everything I’ve done… it can’t be for nothing.”

With Ellie’s confirmation, Piper knew her answer. She could see the hope in Ellie’s eyes. Those eyes had been so void of anything since their entrapment with David. Piper had already failed Ellie once. She knew she couldn’t do it again. How would she live with herself if she let her sister mindlessly walk alone into death's hands? 

“I know you mean well,” Joel began. 

Standing straighter, Ellie interrupted. “I know you wanna protect me. You have. And when we’re done, we’ll go wherever you want. Tommy’s, sheep ranch, the moon.” Joel laughed. 

Inside, Piper cried. Her dream flashed in her mind. She returned to it every night and almost stayed in her dream that day.  God, Piper wanted more than anything to have her dream come true. But Piper had made a promise. It was her and Ellie until the end, and if Ellie wanted to march right into death's arms, so would she. After all, maybe then Piper could do something good. Maybe in her death, she’d finally be able to do what she always wished- then perhaps she’d be able to save someone instead of killing. 

“I’ll follow you anywhere you go,” Ellie continued. “ But there’s no halfway with this. We finish what we started.” 

꧁_____________꧂

Joel’s plan was a plan. That was all Piper could say. After they’d found a way around all the rubble, Joel decided they would just walk around. They’d stumble upon the hospital eventually. However, Piper saw through Joel’s confusion. It was hard to comment on anything over her pain. 

The worst of it came from her leg. Getting shot wasn’t fun. It's definitely an experience Piper wouldn’t recommend. Next came the pain in her eye. About a day or two after they escaped from the cannibalistic cult, she started to lose vision until she became completely blind. 

It was tricky navigating the world with a crippled leg and a narrower peripheral vision. Some days, it was too hard. Phantom pain from her other injuries nabbed at her, cutting deep into her mind. She was weak. Piper couldn’t even walk a few miles without her leg giving out. Most of their travels to Salt Lake consisted of Piper using Joel as a crutch. Eventually, Joel assembled one for her, but she refused to use it. She just couldn’t. Not when she knew how strong she could be. If anything, Piper would just suffer through the pain. After all, it’s what she deserved for failing her sister. Piper deserved it all. 

“Was this a FEDRA thing?” Ellie’s voice cut through the torment circling Piper’s mind. 

Joel shook his head as they entered the abandoned encampment. “No. Army,” he corrected. “They put these places up all around the first few days after the outbreak. Emergency medical camps. Obviously, it didn't last. They had me in one just like this.”

Looking back, Joel noticed Piper lagging. Her face clenched as her hand grazed over her leg. Nodding to Ellie, he led them to a makeshift bench. The tension in Piper’s face eased.

“Were you there with Sarah?” Ellie asked, resuming their previous conversation.

“No,” Joel’s face dropped as he looked at his hands. “She was gone already.”

“Oh,” uttered Ellie. 

“So what did happened?” Piper piped up to distract from the lingering pain in her thigh. 

“It was for this.” Joel pointed to the scar on the side of his head. 

Ellie’s eyes widened with recognition. “Ah, the guy who shot and missed. I figured that would’ve happened later.”

“No. Second day,” Joel explained.

“Well, I’ve gotta hand it to the Army people,” Ellie sighed. “They were way better at stitchin’ you up than Piper was.” She peered at her sister, hoping her teasing comment would help distract Piper. It didn’t. 

“It was me,” Joel admitted. “I was the guy who shot and missed.”

Piper gulped. “Oh…” She breathed. All thoughts of her pain were replaced with concern for Joel. 

“There’s no story.” Joel began. He hated telling this story. He was at his lowest. His weakest. He had lost everything. “Sarah died… and I couldn’t see the point anymore. Simple as that. And I wasn’t scared either. I was ready. I couldn’t have been more ready. When I… When I… went to pull the trigger, I-I flinched. Still don’t know why.” 

Piper fiddled with her fingers, tracing the scars along her palms. She’d been there. Piper would have done it, and she wouldn’t have missed. In her mind, she saw the mall, the infected, and Ellie and Riley. Unconsciously, Piper trailed up to the scar of her bite mark. The mark was a perfect match to her teeth. She could still hear Riley and Ellie’s begs–asking her to kill them. 

“Anyway, the reason I’m telling you all this…” Joel trailed off, looking at Piper’s, whose knuckles had turned white. 

“I know why you’re tellin’ me all this,” Ellie interjected. 

Joel turned to her. “Yeah, I reckon you do,” he smiled. 

“So time heals all wounds, I guess.” Ellie jokingly rolled her eyes at the cliche. 

“It’ll be fucking years then…” Piper mumbled, making Joel’s heart shatter. 

“It wasn’t time that did it.” It was said so softly, but even through their trauma-induced daze, the girls heard it. 

“Oh…” Piper softly said. A faint smile ghosted her lips. 

“Well, I’m glad that… that didn’t work out,” Ellie muttered. 

“Me, too,” Joel admitted. 

Suddenly, he felt a gentle weight on his side. Joel’s eyes trailed over to Piper, who leaned against him. She avoided his gaze, but the gentle pressure said more than anything she could muster. Like a domino effect, he felt Ellie rest her head on the other side. There, they sat in silence, embracing each other’s comfort. 

Just as fast as their moment started, it ended. 

“We should probably get going,” Joel sighed, pushing himself up. 

“Yeah,” the girl half-heartedly agreed. 

“You know what I’m in the mood for?” Joel announced. 

“What?” Ellie asked.

Joel smirked and peered down at her. “Shitty puns.”

A groan erupted from Piper’s mouth. “God no, Joel, why’d you have to-? “

“Oh-ho-ho.” Ellie chuckled, already flipping through the pages of the book. “People are making apocalypse jokes like there’s no tomorrow.” Joel winced. “Too soon?”

“No, it’s topical.”

Ellie giggled. “Oh, I love this one.”

“Moon rocks taste better than Earth rocks. Why?” She paused, wiggling her brows at Joel and Piper. “Cause they’re meteor.”

“Oh, that’s terrible,” Joel exclaimed.

“Fuck you,” Ellie scoffed. “That was actually good.”

“That’s a… That…,” Joel waved his hands in search of words. “That’s a zero outta 10.”

“All right, all right.” Ellie read a new joke. “What did the green grape say to the purple grape? Breathe, you idiot.”

“That was a three outta 10.”

Ellie shook her head. “Seven, minimum.” 

“Uh-uh.” Ellie disagreed.

“I’m sticking with the three,” Piper added from behind the group. 

“I’ll give it a five,” Joel settled.

“Five outta 10. Five?” Ellie dramatically gasped. 

CLANG!

The trio whirled around. In between Ellie, Joel, and Piper sat a small flash bomb. Joel grabbed onto Ellie’s shoulder, pulling her close. Piper ducked and covered her ears. 

As Piper’s head hit the ground, she couldn’t hear anything. She knew she was calling out for Joel and Ellie. It looked like they were saying her name if she squinted hard enough. Her head hurt, and it felt wet. She groaned and fell to her side. Two foggy figures loomed overhead. And then it was black.

꧁_____________꧂

“Is her head okay?” A faint voice tickled Piper’s senses. 

Someone was touching her. Piper’s hand clasped around the person. Her eyes whirled open, and then she pounced. She fought until the poor woman lay on the ground. The teen could see the terror oozing from the woman, her hands raised. 

“Piper?” A familiar voice commanded. “Piper! Let her go.” Piper tore her gaze off the trembling woman and onto Marlene.

“Marlene?” Realizing she still sat over the woman, Piper pushed herself off. She sent a silent apology, collecting herself. One thing was for sure. Everything hurt, more so than usual. “What happened?” She croaked, rubbing her aching head. Her hand felt sticky. It was covered in a clear ointment mixed with blood. Her blood. 

Marlene dismissed the woman, who quickly left the room. “Patrol didn’t know you were coming. You got the worst of it.” The woman pointed to Piper’s head injury.

“Yeah,” Piper scoffed. “I could tell. Where’s Ellie and Joel?” 

There was a pause before Marlene answered her. “Ellie’s fine. Been asking about you. Joel’s still unconscious.”

Ellie. The Fireflies. If they were here at the hospital, then… “Can I see Ellie?”

“Piper,” Marlene’s gaze grew avoidant. “All you need to know is that she’s safe.”

It was a bullshit answer. An answer Piper wouldn’t take. “Marlene, where’s my sister?” 

Marlene sighed with a look that made Piper fear the answer. “She’s being prepped for surgery…” Piper shuddered, and a gasp left her mouth. She couldn’t look at Marlene. She couldn’t look anywhere. Piper couldn’t do anything as sobs choked their way out. 

“You know.” Marlene stood straighter and marched over to Piper. Her eyes glared down at Piper. “Did Ellie-?”

“No,” Piper sniffled. “I…I couldn’t tell her. Not when I had- can I say goodbye?” Marlene shook her head. “Fuck…” Piper whimpered. Tears stung her skin as they trickled from her eyes down her cheeks. 

“Piper, I’m sorry-” Marlene tried to comfort her. 

“What about Joel?” Piper yelled. She stared up at Marlene. The pools in her eyes reflected the woman’s stern expression. “Can I say goodbye? Please, Marlene. Please.” Marlene didn’t answer her. Piper had to see Joel, she had to–“I’m saving the fucking world, and you won’t let me say goodbye?!”

Marlene took in a deep and steady breath that seemed to last hours. She raised her finger, and in came a Firefly soldier. “Grab her some paper and a pen.” The materials magically appeared. Marlene threw them into Piper’s hands. “Here, you’ll write your goodbye.”

Piper hurriedly placed the papers down and uncapped the pen. “Does Joel know?” She asked. 

“Know what?” Marlene’s voice came out harsher than Piper had ever heard it. 

“That you’re killing us for the cure.”

There was a deafening silence before Marlene answered. “No.”

“Are you gonna tell him?” Piper asked, tearing her attention away from the letter. 

“Just hurry up and write that goodbye,” Marlene hissed. 

Piper didn’t need another warning and scrambled to scribble on the papers. Her hands shook so much that Piper worried her last words would be illegible. She inhaled. She exhaled. She calmed herself, but only as much as could be expected from someone about to die. As she wrote, her vision grew sloppier. It was hard to see even with her blind eye. Still, she pushed through. With a trembling hand, she signed the letter. When Marlene snatched it out of her hands, a strangled sob scrambled out. 

“Promise me he’ll get it,” Piper begged. “Promise me, Marlene.”

Marlene folded the letter and shoved it into her pocket. “Finish bandaging her up and get her prepped,” she instructed her fireflies. Then, turning on her heel, Marlene stepped out the door. 

Behind her, Piper yelled. “Marlene, please! Please promise me. Please!” 

꧁_____________꧂

“Welcome to the Fireflies” was the first thing Joel heard once his consciousness returned. Groggy, he pushed himself up to sit opposite Marlene. 

“Easy.” Marlene gently spoke. “Ya got hit pretty hard. Patrol didn’t know who you were.”

Joel’s eyes scanned the room. Something was missing. Someone. His girls. “Where’s the girls?”

“Ellie wasn’t hurt,” Marlene began. Her answer relieved Joel, but it was not what he needed to hear. “Not even a scratch. Piper got the short end of the stick. My people are fixing her up now. They’re mostly worried about you.”

“Where are they?” He gruffly asked. His eyes stared down into Marlene’s, who remained calm. 

“We lost half our crew crossing the country.” Joel frowned. She didn’t answer him. Why? She refused to answer him. “I had five men whose only job was to protect me. And I still almost got killed. How’d you do it?”

“It was all them,” Joel admitted. “Ellie and Piper fought like hell to get here.”

Marlene shook her head in disbelief. “They would’ve been dead on day one.” Sighing, she leaned back into her chair and crossed her arms. “You are the one person I never wanted to be in debt to. But I owe you. We all owe you.”

“Just take me to them,” Joel pleaded. His voice was soft, and in a tone Marlene had never heard from the man. 

“I can’t.” Joel’s face contorted, and his jaw clenched. “Ellie’s being prepped for surgery. Piper soon after.”

“What surgery?” Joel questioned Marlene so slowly it sounded like a growl. 

“Our doctor…,” Marlene explained, “he thinks that the Cordyceps in the girls have grown with them since birth.”

His teeth started to grind against the others. His tanned knuckles grew paler by the second. “Why is Ellie in surgery?”

“It produces a kind of chemical messenger. It makes normal Cordyceps think that she’s Cordyceps. It’s why she’s immune. He’s gonna remove it from her, multiply the cells in a lab, produce those chemical messengers… and then we can give it to everyone. He thinks it could be a cure, Joel.”

“A cure,” Joel scoffed. Then he froze. 

No. No. No. No. No!

“Cordyceps grow inside the brain,” Joel stated. 

Marlene gulped before confirming Joel’s fears. “It does.”

“Find someone else,” Joel gasped. 

“There is no one else.” Marlene stood up and held out her hand to Joel. In it were wrinkled papers. He could see dark ink seeping through the thin sheets. “Here, this is for you.” 

He snatched them from her hand and flicked them open. His hands gently straightened out any faults caused by Marlene’s mishandling. His breath shuddered, and his body trembled as he began to read. 

To Joel:

I’m not really sure when and if you get this, but God, I hope you do. Marlene wouldn’t let me see you; she said you were out. She wouldn’t let me see Ellie either, and I’d rather get out one goodbye than never have said anything at all. 

When we started this journey, we were just cargo, and you were our carrier. That’s how it was supposed to be. Then you did something I never thought would happen. You made me trust you. You made me feel safe. You made me feel at home, even when it was the last thing I ever wanted to feel. You reminded me how to live and not just survive. 

God…I…there’s so much I want to say, but I can’t. Marlene’s getting impatient. Ellie’s going into surgery, and then I’m next. You came into this thinking we’d walk out, but we won’t. And it’s okay. It’ll be okay, Joel. Maybe now I can save someone. Maybe with me dying, I don’t have to kill anymore. 

I just want you to know that when I go, I’m gonna dream of that farm. I’m gonna dream of Ellie and her puns, you playing guitar and yelling at some stupid sheep. Cause that’s my dream. A home with my family. A home with my sister and my dad. 

Goodbye Joel Dad

- Piper Williams 

With as much care as he could muster, Joel folded the letter and placed it in his breast pocket over his heart. A large tear fell to the floor, and Joel stifled a sob. 

Marlene took Joel’s silence as a cue to speak again. “We didn’t tell Ellie. We didn’t cause her any fear; there won’t be any pain. Piper-she knows.”

Joel’s head started shaking. A physical sign of his rejection. He couldn’t let them do this. He wouldn’t lose his girls. Not when he’d just- “No. No, you take me to them. You take me to Ellie and Piper right now!” He stood up, all anger and fury, and lunged for Marlene. Joel was fast, but her men were faster. With a swift kick of the knee, Joel toppled to the floor. 

“Please...” Joel cried. You don’t understand.” He kneeled in front of Marlene as if to pray. He needed the girls; he loved them. They were his redemption. “Please.” 

“I do. I was there when she was born, Joel.” Marlene glared down at Joel. “I promised her mother that I would save her children. I promised. So I do understand. I’m the only one who understands. I’m sorry. I have no other choice.”

But he did. Joel had a– “I do,” he growled. 

“Walk him out to the highway,” Marlene commanded. “Leave him there with his pack. Give him this.” Joel saw the glimmer of Ellie’s switchblade. His baby girl. “He tries anything… shoot him.”

The Fireflies nodded and nudged Joel off the floor with their guns. Joel scowled as Marlene watched him be escorted away. Each step farther away from the room, from his girls, was agony. In the dimly lit hospital hallway, Joel plotted. He was Joel fucking Miller, and he was going to get his girls back. The lights flickered, and Joel saw it. It was a sign reading “pediatric surgery: 6th floor.” The sixth floor. That’s where his girls would be. 

“I didn’t hear anyone say, “Stop.” One of the Firefly men shoved Joel along. 

“Which way?” Joel mumbled. 

“Down the stairs.” They pushed Joel along. 

As Joel stumbled down the staircase, he found his feet frozen. He refused to move any farther. 

“The fuck are you doin’? Keep walking!”  Joel stayed still. He waited. Marlene had only sent two men to escort him out—a mistake. Marlene should have known it would have taken much more to keep Joel away. “I said keep walk–”

Joel brought the heel of his palm into one of the men’s noses. CRACK! Blood poured out of the broken nose. The firefly tumbled to the floor, clutching his injury. Joel saw his chance and grabbed the gun. He cocked it and fired. The second man died. Shot right in the head. 

“Where is she?!” Joel demanded, holding the gun to the surviving Firefly's head. 

Through all the blood, the man looked up at Joel. “Fuck you.”

“I don’t have time for this.”

BANG! The Firefly fell limp. His radio blared to life. 

“Shots fired. Shots fired!” 

Joel frowned. They’d all be coming for him now, but he didn’t care. He had to save his girls. Marching up the stairs, Joel began his prowl. Expertly, his gun aimed and fired. The soldiers dropped like flies in the path of Joel’s protective fury. 

BANG!

BANG!

BANG!

The sound of the gun followed Joel wherever he stalked along the halls of the hospital. Some of the people he came across fought. But like a bear in pursuit of protecting its cubs, they didn’t stand a chance. There was no such thing as mercy for Joel when these very people were out to kill his girls. He was swiftly making his way through the hospital–a trail of bodies in tow. 

BANG!

BANG!

BANG!

And then silence. His breath stilled as the sign for pediatric surgery came into view. He scoured each room for any sign of his girls. But he found none. Still, Joel trekked. A faint light seeped from beneath a pair of doors up ahead. Quiet beeping sounds echoed louder than the shots from before. 

“Do we have enough power?” Someone asked. 

Joel pushed the door open with the butt of his gun. 

“She’s ready,” a nurse said. Her hands hovered over Ellie. 

The young teen’s hair lay long and brushed. All the grim from before had been washed from her body. She looked clean and peaceful as she lay on the surgery table. 

“Unhook her,” Joel uttered. The nurses gasped at the sight of the gun, immediately raising their hands. 

The surgeon, however, seethed with anger. In his hand, he held a scalpel. The blade glinted over Ellie’s scalp. “How did you get in here?” 

Joel carefully watched the blade. “I said unhook her.”

No one except the surgeon made a move. The surgeon surged forward and stood between Ellie and Joel. In his hand, he defensively held the scalpel. “I won’t let you take her.”

BANG!

The surgeon dropped dead. Nurses screamed and cowered. 

“Unhook her!” Joel yelled. “Move!” 

Quickly, the nurses unhooked Ellie. Silently, they prayed to a god, to anyone to have mercy. The beeping monitor went silent. Blood trickled down Ellie’s arm from where the IV was placed. 

“Cover her arm,” Joel commanded. “Fast.”

Within the blink of an eye, one of the nurses had covered the wound. 

“Turn around.” Joel watched as the women quickly turned away. Just as fast, Joel lifted Ellie off of the table. She was cold but breathing. Her head flopped against Joel’s shoulder, and he worried. If Ellie was in this state, what about Piper? He didn’t have the arms and the strength to carry both girls out of the hospital. Joel held Ellie tighter. He’d have to do something he never wanted to do. Joel would have to get Ellie safe and then find Piper. He just prayed she’d be fine until he could rescue her. 

Elevator doors closed in front of Joel. His arms ached from the unconscious weight of Ellie. He sighed, and Ellie snuggled closer to him. Soon, the silver doors slid open. Joel stepped out into the hospital’s parking garage. If the Fireflies had power, then they’d have cars. Working ones. The low rumble of a car engine drew Joel’s attention. He shuffled over to the vehicle.

CLICK!

“You can’t keep her safe forever,” Marlene taunted. Joel turned around. There stood Marlene with a gun. But it wasn’t pointed at Joel. No. It was pointed at Piper. 

“Joel,” Piper sobbed in Marlene’s clutch. Relief flooded her body at the sight of Joel holding Ellie. She was alive. Her sister was alive. 

“Piper…” Joel met her dark eyes. “Let her go.” He demanded. 

Marlene shook her head. “No. I won’t let you take them, Joel.” Her hand pushed the barrel of the gun deeper into Piper’s head. The girl groaned from the pain. 

“Let her go!” Joel yelled. 

“Joel!” Piper gasped. “Take Ellie. Take her and let them have me. Save Ellie. Save her.”

Shaking his head, Joel fought back tears. No, he had made it this far. He was going to save them both. He had to save them. “No, Piper. No. I’m gettin’ you both out of here.”

“No matter how hard you try, no matter how many people you kill, they’re gonna grow up, Joel,” Marlene scoffed. “And then you’ll die. They’ll leave. Then what?” Marlene cocked her head. “How long till they’re torn apart by Infected or murdered by raiders?” Piper whimpered under Marlene’s grip. Her grasp tightened around the teen’s neck, making it hard to breathe. “Because they live in a broken world that you could have saved.”

“Maybe,” Joel agreed. “But it isn’t for you to decide.”

“Or you,” Marlene scolded.  “So what would she decide, huh? ‘Cause I think Ellie’d wanna do what’s right. And you know it. It’s not too late. Even now…even after what you’ve done. We can still find a way.”

Joel gazed down at sleeping Ellie and then at Piper. They were his world. Maybe he wouldn’t be saving the world by taking them, but he’d be protecting his. It was selfish. He knew, but Joel deserved to be selfish, and so selfish he chose to be. 

“Piper…” Joel muttered. “Do you trust me?”

“Yes,” Piper whimpered. 

BANG!

The world thrashed around Piper as the tight hold on her loosened. Marlene groaned. Her body was on the floor as blood flooded from her. 

“Joel!” Piper screamed, running to him. Her feet tripped over her hospital gown as she ran. “Joel!” She collapsed at his side, clutching his shoulders. Sobs ransacked her body. Joel leaned his head against hers. It was the best he could offer with his hands full of Ellie. 

“I got you,” Joel whispered. “I’ve got you, sweet girl.” 

A guttural cough cut through their reunion. Joel’s softened face grew dark as his sight landed on Marlene. It was a pitiful scene. The woman’s hands clawed at the floor over to the discarded weapon. A trail of her blood trickled after her. 

“Piper,” Joel calmly said. “Take your sister and put her in the car.” He passed Ellie’s body into Piper’s arms. Momentarily, she buckled under the weight. Regaining herself, Piper limped over to the vehicle. She braced Ellie against the doors before lifting her to lie in the back seat. 

Behind, Joel stalked after Marlene. 

“No, wait.” Marlene raised her hand. “Wait, wait, wait.” Joel peered down at her. “Please,” she begged. Her breaths had become pants as her body pumped more and more blood onto the concrete. “Let me go.”

“You’d just come after them.” Joel cocked his gun and aimed. “You’d come after my girls.”

꧁_____________꧂

They had left the city far behind. Now, the tall buildings were specks of dust in the wind. Piper sat with her head against the passenger window. She wasn’t sure how she was supposed to feel. One thing was for sure: Piper didn’t feel numb. After she danced with death in the smoke of the room, she was almost butchered in; Piper found it hard to feel anything but pain. A part of her only wanted to feel pain. It made everything easier: the guilt of failing Ellie, the guilt of leaving Joel in that basement, the guilt of– Piper hissed. Her nails had dug into the skin around the scar on her thigh. Damn, these hospital gowns for being so thin. 

“You okay?” Joel asked, peering over at her. 

Piper removed her hand and shrugged. “I’m…” fine. It was the easiest thing to say. She’d said it before, and Joel didn't push. But was it what she wanted to say? “No.” Joel stayed quiet. She was thankful for it. As long as she continued to look out the window, maybe she could trick herself into thinking she wasn’t telling anyone these dark thoughts–that she wasn’t telling anyone the truth. “I don’t think I’ve ever been okay. Ever.” 

Getting into a more comfortable position, Piper continued. “I was twelve when I first…when I first killed someone. I thought I could trust him, that he’d keep me safe, keep us safe.” Joel peeked at Ellie through the rearview mirror. “But his safety came with a price. One I couldn’t pay, so I–”

“Piper,” Joel interjected. “You don’t have to tell me.”

“But I do, Joel. I need to. Please?” Joel nodded and remained silent. “I killed him, and then FEDRA decided that if I could kill a man in self-defense, I could kill for them. So I did. That’s all I did for five years.” She stifled a sob. “I couldn’t–mess up, get sick, nothing, or else they’d leave Ellie all alone. It was my punishment. Then, one night, we ended up in the clutches of the Fireflies. They kept us chained in a room until you came along. Next thing I knew, Ellie and I were special cargo to be taken across the country.” 

Piper sniffled and then chuckled. “You know when I first met you, I hated you.” She laughed again. “Funny how we ended up here, huh?” Joel gazed over at Piper. Her laughter died down, returning to sniffles. “Can I ask you something?”

“Yeah,” Joel replied. 

“When you said,” Piper hesitated, “you weren’t afraid of death, that you welcomed it, what did you–what did it feel like?”

Joel sighed. “It felt…easy. Every day after Sarah’s death was filled with pain. It still hasn’t gone away,” Joel turned to give Piper a comforting smile. “But it has stopped hurting.” 

Piper nodded, taking in Joel’s words. “When I was trapped in that building, knowing I failed Ellie, that I’d failed you-” Joel desperately wanted to tell her she hadn’t failed. She had survived. They all had. “I wanted to give up. It was easy just to lay down and breathe in the smoke till I–” She looked down at her hands. “But, I didn’t…and some part of me still wishes I did. That’s why I didn’t tell you or Ellie. It was easy to keep quiet and march like a lamb to slaughter. I wouldn’t be in pain anymore. I wouldn’t have to feel all this guilt and hate. I wouldn’t have to be a killer. I wouldn’t have to be Piper.” 

A warm hand encased Piper’s shoulder. Joel’s fingers rubbed up and down in a soothing manner. “Even if some part of me wanted the easy way out, the others didn’t. I-” Piper took in a shaky breath. “Thank you, Joel. For saving me. For saving Ellie.”

Joel knew that no simple “you’re welcome” would suffice. Instead, he wrapped his arm around Piper and pulled her to his side. “Always,” he whispered. “Always.” 

Pulling back, Piper wiped tears and snot away from her face. “Joel?” Her quiet voice questioned. 

“Hmm?” He hummed. 

“What are you gonna tell Ellie?”

Joel sighed. His hand holding the wheel tightened. “I don’t know, kid. I don’t know.” 

As if on cue, Ellie groaned. Her body shifted on the back seat. Piper grew quiet and leaned back up against the window. 

“What?” Ellie mumbled. 

“It’s all right,” Joel cooed. “You’re with me.” Ellie pushed herself up but immediately toppled back down. “Take it slow. The drugs are still wearin’ off.”

“I was with the Fireflies, and then…,” Ellie groggily furrowed her brows. “What drugs?”

“They were runnin’ some tests on you…” Joel trailed off, finding his next words. “And some others. Turns out there’s a whole lot more like you… people that are immune. Dozens of ’em. And the doctors, they couldn’t make any of it work. They’ve actually…They’ve stopped lookin’ for a cure.” Joel heard Piper hold her breath at the lie. 

“Where are my clothes?” Ellie wondered in her dazed state. 

“Raiders attacked the hospital. I barely got ya outta there. We’ll find you some new ones on the way.”

Ellie laid her head back down, snuggling into the seat. “Were people hurt?”

“Yes,” Joel solemnly said. 

“Is Marlene okay?”

Joel gulped. “I’m takin’ us home.” Ellie half-presently nodded before dozing off again.  “I’m sorry,” he whispered to the young teen. 

After Piper was sure her sister was out, she turned to Joel. “Joel?” She asked. 

“You should get some rest,” Joel brushed off her inquiry. “You’ve been through a lot.”

Piper scoffed and shook her head. “I’m not tired.”

A knowing smile crept onto Joel’s face. “That’s what they all say, kid.” Piper wasn’t having it. Sighing, Joel compromised. “Just rest your eyes. It’ll be a long drive.”

“Okay…” Piper reluctantly agreed. She sniffled one last time before closing her eyes. The constant rumbling of the car’s tires rolling against the road beneath lulled her to sleep. Her breath slowed, matching the cadence of her younger sister's slow inhales. All the while, Joel drove. Strangely enough, he found himself feeling content. His girls were safe, and they were going home. Home. 

꧁_____________꧂

“Well,” Joel’s hands slapped against his thighs as the car hood shut. Steam angrily fled into the air. “She got us close enough. We gotta walk the rest of the way.” He trotted to where the girls sat and leaned against the car's frame. “Probably about a five-hour hike… but we can manage that. Remember?”

“Yeah.” Ellie nodded. 

Piper finished rolling up the sleeves of her shirt. Joel had found both her and Ellie new clothes. The hospital gowns weren’t the chosen attire for an apocalyptic world. “Yeah,” Piper chimed. 

Joel flashed them a smile, and then they went off. Piper found herself welcoming their journey. She hated to admit that she missed trekking through nature. While driving in a car was nice, easy, and fast, it wasn’t what she was used to. Besides, Piper preferred feeling the ground beneath her own two feet. 

“You know,” Joel huffed. The hike was getting to him. “Sarah and I used to hike like this all the time. I wouldn’t say it was her favorite thing. She wasn’t a fan of the mosquitoes and such. But she was a big climber… or scampering. That’s probably the right word. That girl… she’d see a big rock and just… pew.” He chuckled as a memory of his daughter appeared in his mind. 

Piper nodded her head and playfully nudged Ellie. “Sounds like someone I know.” Ellie rolled her eyes. 

“Sounds more like you–” Ellie countered. 

“Well, you were the one who climbed up a tree and couldn’t climb down.”

“That was–”

Joel snickered at their bickering. “She woulda liked you two.” Piper and Ellie stopped arguing. “Not to say the three of you are the same.” Joel smiled as if he knew some inside joke the girls didn’t. “Definitely different kids.”

“How so?” Ellie wondered, stepping up beside Joel. Piper stood on Joel’s opposite side. Their attention was drawn to Joel. 

“Well,” He began, “she was a lot more… I wanna say girly, and I’m not sayin’ that you’re not girly.”

“I’m not,” Ellie smirked. “If anything, Piper’s more girly than me.”

Piper wasn’t sure if she should take it as a compliment or an insult. However, responding to an insult was preferably much more fun. “Hey!” She feigned offence. 

“Yeah, you’re not,” Joel agreed with Ellie. “She was taller. She had a killer smile. Again, not sayin’ that you two don’t.” Ellie smiled broadly at Piper and winked. Piper rolled her eyes but smiled back. Joel laughed. “But you know why I think she’d like you, Ellie?”

Ellie’s smile fell. “Why?”

“Cause you’re funny,” Joel stated. “I think you would’ve made her laugh. Anyway, I bet you would’ve liked her back.”

“Yeah, bet I would’ve,” Ellie muttered. 

“And for Piper,” Joel said, not forgetting the other girl. “Sarah would love to try and make you laugh. And she’d look up to you.”

Piper paused, and a soft smile appeared on her face. “Thanks, Joel. Sarah sounds nice.”

“She was.” Joel concurred. Briefly, he looked down at the cracked watch adorning his wrist. Once he glanced up, he beamed. Ahead stood the faint outline of Jackson. Home. “Not much further now.”

Joel and Piper eagerly continued down the path. Ellie did not. 

“Hey, wait.” Joel and Piper whirled around. Ellie’s eyes widened as if she didn’t expect them to respond. “Fuck,” she softly cursed. “Back in Kansas City, you asked me about the first time I killed someone.” Joel placed his hands on his hips. His ears listened as Ellie spoke. Meanwhile, Piper grew distantly quiet. 

“When I got bit in the mall, I-It wasn’t just Piper and me.” Ellie looked away. Piper could see the tell Ellie tried to conceal. “My best friend was there, and she got bit, too.” Ellie sniffled. Piper felt her own eyes grow watery. Riley. Sweet Riley. “We didn’t know what to do, and she says, “We can just wait it out… be all poetic and just lose our minds together. And then she did. And I had to…” Piper wanted to draw Ellie into a hug, but she knew her sister had more to say. The comfort could always come later. “Her name was Riley… and she was the first to die. And then it was Tess. And then Sam and Henry.” 

Joel shook his head. “That’s not on you.”

“I know, but…” Ellie tried to argue, but Joel continued. 

“Look, sometimes things don’t work out the way we hope.” Joel peered over at Piper. He wasn’t just saying this to Ellie. It was a message for both of his girls. “You can feel like… like you’ve come to an end… and you don’t know what to do next. But if you just keep goin’… you find something new to fight for. And maybe that’s not what…”

“Swear to me,” Ellie interjected. “Swear to me that everything you said about the Fireflies is true.”

Piper looked away. She had never been more interested in her feet. Joel had an expressionless face as he answered her. “I swear.” 

After a moment, Ellie spoke. “Okay.”

She had believed him. Piper let out a shaky breath and looked over at Joel. They shared a glance. Their eyes agreed to the lie. It was a necessary one. A lie that they both now concealed. 

The rest of the journey to Jackson had been uneventful. Tommy had found them close to Jackson when he was on patrol. The reunion was sweet. Joel hugged his brother before breaking away, allowing Tommy to steal hugs from the girls. They hadn’t been expecting it by how brief and tight the hugs had been, but they had been welcomed embraces. 

Maria smiled when they walked back into town. The streets had changed from the snow-covered, Christmas-decorated roads to colorful and lively bustling ones. People discarded their winter gear for lighter clothes. The summer sun and heat crept over the mountains, waiting to pounce. But for now, the air was at a pleasant temperature. As Maria showed them back to the house they had stayed in during their brief stay in Jackson, Piper spotted a familiar head of curls. Charlie. He amicably waved at her. By amicably, Charlie practically jumped where he stood, calling out her name. Piper flushed a deep shade of red and flipped him off. Joel laughed, and Ellie smirked. Her clever eyes darted between the two teens. She had something to tease her sister about. 

The sun had begun to set as Joel, Piper, and Ellie settled back into the house. Each crawled out of their rooms after a long nap. Joel was the last to emerge. Age had made his cravings for naps extremely powerful. With a yawn, he pushed open the front door. A wave of deja vu fell over him. 

There sat his girls on the porch. Ellie was teasing Piper about the boy they’d seen on the street. Piper rolled her eyes and denied everything, making it hard for Ellie to continue her interrogation. Instead, the young teen pulled out her pun book. Fingers flipped through the pages, landing on a particular joke. Piper dramatically groaned, and Joel realized he had seen this all before. 

It was the dream. Joel’s dream. Here they were, his girls safe and sound with a whole life ahead of them. Joel felt a pleasant warmth spread throughout his body. He stood and leaned against the door frame for ages, capturing this moment in his head. The girls had been his redemption–a sinner’s redemption. Now that he had his dream, Joel was content with just living it. This was why he missed that day. This was why he stayed. He, too, deserved a second chance. They all did. 

꧁_____________꧂

Thank you all again for your support. If you enjoyed this series please comment and reblog so that more people can embark on this journey with Piper, Ellie and Joel. :)

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[sysmedsaresexist]

Hot Take

If what you're expressing is cruel vitriol, hate, and uneducated word vomit, you're not looking for a "safe space"

You're using "safe space" as a shield and you should feel bad

Safe spaces are for talking about the reality of your experience without judgment, and that's all you're really doing

Judging people and being mean

Like, you're the people that vulnerable communities make safe spaces to get away from

[thebibliosphere]

Huh. I forgot there was a reason I switched to building/strategy games a few years back.

The adrenaline I was getting from playing Dishonored (sneaky fun times! try not to get caught or you get stabbed!) triggered such a strong stress response my mast cells decided I was in danger, and now I have hives and a POTS headache.

... absolutely worth it. I will now, however, be playing farming simulators for a while. Just to calm things down 😂

[mr-leach]

Hey so me & Malcolm's cell service got shut down today. I was going to pay for it to be restored but unfortunately the copay for my emergency dental work was just under $100 and I'm completely broke.

The good news is I do get paid tomorrow, but because I was only in for one day last week, I won't have enough to get groceries, pay for transit to and from work next week, and pay off my phone bill, as well as the copay for the last bit of dental work I need done Saturday & any meds they prescribe. So I thought I would at least try and ask if anyone out there would be willing to help out, even a little.

Thank you for reading/sharing/donating if you're able to help.