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everygame · 1 year

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Days Gone (PS4)

Developed/Published by: Bend Studio / Sony Interactive Entertainment Released: 26/4/2019 Completed: 05/05/2023 Completion: Beat it. Trophies / Achievements: 48%

Two in a row here for me getting burned by “it’s not as bad as people say.” I mean, honestly, what is it about that that attracts me? It’s not even successfully contrarian, because you’re really hedging your bets by waiting to be told something isn’t bad before you try and stick your flag in “it’s good actually” territory. Plus, what is it I’m really holding out for? Something that I can class as “not bad” or “quite good”? (And that’s quite good in the British sense.) I mean, is it really worth my time watching a movie like Renfield to think “it’s not as bad as people say” rather than filling in, say, a Kurosawa I haven’t seen?

But of course, you can’t eat Michelin star restaurants every night; sometimes you’re going to want a (impossible) whopper.

The problem with things like Days Gone is that it’s like eating a whopper that’s six miles long. And I know that the Whopper comes in a round bun, so if I wanted a bun that made sense giving it extra length I probably should have gone for the (vegan) chicken royale, but I could probably eat a six mile long vegan chicken royale because they’re brilliant. And they already put about six miles worth of mayo on them.

To dig my way out of that riff… why are games like Days Gone like this? So grotesquely, illogically distended? I know exactly how they pitched this over at Sony HQ. A man walked in and said “What if State of Decay, rather than a game where players generated their own stories, was as relentlessly scripted as The Last of Us. And it played exactly like Red Dead Redemption 2.”

And before the man at Sony could respond the man pitching said “and the horse is a motorbike.”

It’s not a horrible idea, even if the influences are worn so apparently on the game’s sleeves that you almost wonder why you’re bothering. I mean the combat is literally Red Dead Redemption’s right down to the “focus” mechanic, and they’ve even got Red Dead Redemption’s random events and even animal hunting in it (which is crap, and thankfully you never need to bother with it.)

(A big aside here however to note that this is yet another piece of media with anti-wolf propaganda featuring the animals as creatures who attack on sight even though wolves sensibly stay the fuck away from humans. Also being forced to murder some bears in this can fuck off too.)

Anyway. Moment-to-moment, Days Gone plays perfectly well in a textbook case of “it’s not as bad as people say” once you actually get your weapons and bike and character upgraded a bit… which is another thing I’m going to complain about. What’s the point in having upgrade systems in your game if it just means the first five or ten or however bloody long of your game you’re stumbling about with a character that just feels crap to play? But once you get there–which takes far too fucking long–the shooting is fun enough, driving around is smooth, and you find yourself quite easily locked into the classic open-world “there’s always another box to tick off” loop.

Where it falls down, really, is that there isn’t… always another box to tick off??? The game has a really baffling way of doling out missions meaning that I often had only one mission on the whole map I could do. I actually thought I was completely screwed about a third of the way through this because the only mission I had to do was a motorbike chase and my bike was woefully unequipped because I didn’t have enough “trust” with the camp that would upgrade my bike to actually even really keep up with the enemy I was chasing. Thanks to my incredible skills, of course, I did beat it and then suddenly about six missions all appeared, but for many players that might have been it.

(If you want to hear something ridiculous about the way the game doles out missions, you basically can only get them when you’re riding on your bike outside of the camps, meaning that you’ll be in a camp with nothing to do, drive outside, suddenly get a radio call from the people inside that camp, and have to go right back. I know why they do it–what if you got the radio call while standing in front of the NPC in the camp–but why can’t you just get the whole task on the radio? You drive back and they just tell you what to do! They could have done it over the bloody radio!!!)

The pacing here is just so incredibly off. Trust with camps takes an age to grow because doing a mission might get you (literally) 400 points of the way to 25,000, and handing in bounties or hunting animals gets you like… 3 points each.

Later, of course, you realise it’s this way because the game unlocks its signature experience, “horde hunting” in the endgame, and you’ll be killing so many zombies that you’re swimming in points. However that means you’ve played almost the entire game unlocking almost nothing.

Horde hunting, actually, is the perfect example of how Days Gone just doesn’t quite get it. Hordes are all across the map through the whole game. The game doesn’t introduce the idea that you can defeat them until the end of the game. The hordes that are in the initial areas are smaller–sometimes as few as 25 zombies–and would be perfect to learn from.

The first horde the game expects you defeat, because it’s tied to a mission? Three. Hundred. Zombies.

It is absolutely idiotic. It’s not even a well designed encounter! The second horde you face in the story mode has a very clear path that they can chase you along lined with explosive trucks that kills basically all of them? The “end boss” horde has a train tunnel you can easily funnel them into!

The thing that should be the most fun and rewarding thing in the game you don’t actually do throughout the game unless you know to do it without the game telling you, so by the time you get to do them, you’re probably too fucking bored of the game to want to. I know I was.

(And even then only the story mission hordes get marked with a life bar, so if you’re facing one randomly early in the game you have no idea if you’re actually completing part of the game until the “horde defeated” dialogue comes up. Which it might not, because there’s no leeway, and if you miss a random straggler or they clip out of the world or something (I did face some geometry issues) you’re fucked. And never mind if you’d like to practice on an earlier easier horde before doing that mission once you discover it, because you’re locked out of the earlier part of the map.)

To finish giving this a kicking, I have to say the Last of Us this ain’t. This has the most ridiculously po-faced and predictable story I’ve seen in a game in a while, mistaking a hero who comes across as a petulant arse as a rebel (well, when he doesn’t come across as unhinged, his breathless bloodlust when entering enemy camps is laughable). There’s too much simplistic edgy shit that the writers mistook for profound (damn… man sure can be inhuman to… man) and the game’s main plot, “Our protagonist is sad because his wife is dead… or is she?” is genuinely embarrassing.

I mean, I don’t know where to start with it. I know the writers would swear blind we’re supposed to be laughing along with the game during a flashback where our hero gets married in a backwards ball cap and his new wife says “Promise to ride me as much as your bike” but every other flashback sequence is so saccharine to cry irony there is beyond disingenuous (and I know it’s a callback.) And the game’s classic open-world rug-pull (there’s more map!) leads to a sequence where no character’s motivations make any sense at all. Why aren’t these characters talking to each other, you wonder? Why did our characters make these decisions in the first place???

I did laugh at the game’s “oh no my best friend is dead” fake out right at the end though. It was like Danny Aiello at the end of Hudson Hawk. “Yeah! That’s probably what happened!”

Speaking of that best friend though, (spoilers) a huge chunk of the game is about how he’s sad about how he’s lost an arm and can never ride a bike again. There’s a mission where the protagonist wants to fix it and I thought “oh, he’s going to find the material to get him a device that will help him control a bike one handed” but instead he… makes him a knife arm.

One armed people can ride motorcycles. This game is so stupid.

Will I ever play it again? There are four post-credit missions that absurdly the game makes you wait 8 in-game days to see all of because I guess they assume you’re having at ton of fun playing it more. I wasn’t, I slept in a bed for eight days and then laughed at the cut-scene promising a sequel that will never come via the silliest cliffhanger I can imagine in context.

Final Thought: The weird thing about Days Gone is that you could easily say to me “well, the reason you didn’t like this that much is that you finished it. You should have just played it till you were bored and then stopped.” Except for the fact that the game doesn’t hit the sweet spot of “not as bad as people say” until you’ve played it for ages to get upgraded and shit. This is another game with a new game+ that seems absolutely insane because why would you want to do everything over again. There’s no reason this campaign wasn’t ten hours long, forcing me to specialise in my first playthrough while keeping the upgrades and improvements flowing at a speedy clip and then letting me play the game again doing different things if I want to. No one wants six miles of whopper. Give me six miles of individual whoppers and I’ll think it’s a bit wasteful but I’ll happily eat a couple and move on with my life.

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#video games #games #gaming #days gone #review #text #txt #ps4 #playstation 4 #sony interactive entertainment #bend studios #2019

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mikemadethis · 2 years

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Quick Review: Sonic Frontiers

In my first few hours of Sonic Frontiers I was having a blast. Coming off of Forces I was just happy to be playing a game where Sonic felt fast and fun to control. Jumping from activity to activity was a bit slow but the varied nature of them did a good job keeping me distracted. The more I played however, the more the cracks in the game started to show. The repeating minigames, the broken physics, the lengthy minibosses and the game constantly stopping you in your tracks so it can pan the camera over to something of interest for a second.

Scattered across the map are various activities which can be completed for rewards. Many of these are incredibly simple like the hundreds of platforming micro challenges. Which completely clutter the island full of ugly platforms and rails floating in the sky. These can be somewhat fun to accomplish but they also wrestle control away from the player way too often. Instead of controlling Sonic like you normally would, many challenges will limit your moveset to some degree. It could be a rail which automatically propels sonic forward, or a boss which locks Sonic to a 3 lane runner style of gameplay. It gets to the point where it feels like Sonic's open world movement is mostly just a means to get from point a to point b, since next to none of the challenges are actually testing my abilities with that moveset. In my 15 hour playthrough, I feel like I spent the majority of my time doing things like pinball or three dimensional Tetris, rather than running around and platforming as Sonic in an open world.

These issues are compounded by Sonic Frontiers absolutely baffling collectathon aspects. All of these challenges you can do in the game are to get one of various collectibles. First off, there's waaaaay too many types of collectibles. From Memory Tokens to Portal Gears to Chaos Keys to Seeds of Power, it's just way too many things to keep track of in a game where you constantly just want to be pushing forward. Many game activities require the completion of other activities in order to progress. This isn't too out of the ordinary for games, but it's kind of frustrating in an open world game. Being dropped into a play space with tons of points of interest that you can see on the horizon. Only to make your way over there and be told to come back later. Maybe I'm biased cause of Breath of the Wild, but that game did an amazing job of letting me walk up to something I thought looked interesting and letting me like... interact with it, right away. I assumed Sonic Frontiers was going to be the same, especially since a lot of the marketing seemed to imply you could play the game in whatever way you wanted.

Actually, to be fair to them, Sonic Team DID offer a few ways to bypass certain activities you may find not very enjoyable. But I'd be lying if I said I liked the system they came up with. Okay so you need memory tokens to unlock quest, portal gears (which you get from bosses) to enter cyberspace which you use to get chaos keys which you use to unlock chaos emeralds which you use to fight the boss. But actually you could bypass pretty much all of that ,except for the boss, byyyy fishing. Ya see by collecting some purple coins scattered across the map (or available during a random night time event) you can fish with Big in order to get tokens which can be used to purchase every collectible in the game?! I took advantage of this on the very last Island in the game to the point where I basically had to interact with zero of the activities in the game outside of main quests. All those bosses, platforming challenges and cyber space levels 100% skipped right over. And that's not even including the buried treasures scattered across the island which can give you even more of these collectibles. AND that's not even including the cyloop, this magic technique Sonic can use to fight enemies and interact with puzzles by drawing a circle on the ground. If you happen to draw a circle on the ground with nothing there, you get random drops of items, Including memory tokens. And this isn't some rare drop, if you really wanted to you could sit there and spin and get memory tokens way faster than you ever could by doing the challenges. None of these ways to get collectibles, resemble core gameplay in ANY way, I'd hardly even call them gameplay. If you can play the entire game by spinning in a circle and hitting easy QTE's it kind of detracts from the game proper. It makes me just wonder, is it even worth doing them?

Once you clear all of the main objectives I.E. getting all the chaos emeralds, the rest of the collectibles kind of just become useless. All those bosses undefeated, all those cyber space stages unspeedruned. None of them do anything for you anymore, and the game doesn't seem to care either way if you want to do it. And maybe that's a good thing because the game also doesn't seem to care about keeping a flow state. The amount of unskippable cutscenes in this game is kind of ridiculous. Complete a challenge, bam a cutscene. Walk too close to a boss, bam a cutscene. Stumble across a completely unimpressive structure, yep get ready to get control taken away from you so Sonic can do a Marvel quip about it. This might sound like nitpicking, but I recently installed a bunch of mods just to remove all those moments where the game just doesn't let you keep running and it is INCREDIBLE how much of a difference it makes. All of those simple minigames become so much less of a bother when hopping in and out of them is made as smooth as possible. I'm honestly unsure why they would stop you so much in a SONIC game of all games, but I'm very thankfully for the modders who are working hard to provide some much needed quality of life for this game.

That being said, modders can't fix everything. I still haven't touched on the physics, combat or story yet. All of which are... fine? They're fine. They clearly aren't the best but they're definitely the best we've gotten in a Sonic game in quite some time. With this review I really just wanted to highlight the stuff that REALLY dragged down my experience. The boring objectives, the convoluted collectibles and the lack of flow the game has from one moment to the next. There are things I really like about this game though, I loved the characterization of the cast, probably for the first time since SA2. I loved the Super Sonic boss fights even if they were a bit simple. They were just such a cool spectacle, unlike any we've had in a Sonic game. And while I'm still a bit disappointed that Cyberspace just reused level designs from older games, I actually ended up enjoying them a lot. I like this foundation Sonic Team has set up for the next couple of entries of this franchise. I just hope next time, they actually let me play as Sonic.

#sonic frontiers #sonic #game review

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knights-of-the-glittery-table · 1 year

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This is just for me so I don't sit with it and meow softly and mournfully about it.

I finished the game for the very first time last night!

I had expected to come away emotional and my heart all full but I ended up feeling quite hollow about the way things ended. I'm not talking about the big battle (that was insane) or the main plot cutscene once the evil brain was sent crashing into the river but all that followed after the air cleared and we were all stood on the dock.

Spending hours and hours with these characters I wish there had been more to satisfy me as a player at this very end of the game, a culmination of the love and friendship after all we've been through as a group.

It was just so abrupt.

Certain characters just literally walk off depending on your choices made throughout the game after brief interactions (I have a LOT to say about how Gale acted at the end of my game but I'll put it into one word: YIKES) and then after the rousing cutscene of the city being saved we fade to black and there was (I can only speak of the person I romanced of course!) a short scene in a bedchamber with my romanced person where we had a conversation and that was...it.

Credits rolled.

While we were all still stood on the dock looking around at the chaos left after the battle there was actually a dialogue option to say we should go celebrate and I would have loved so much if there had been a cutscene of us all actually doing that.

I genuinely feel like the course of action should have been us all stood on the docks in a moment of brevity then either a chance given for the player to speak to each character individually then a cutscene of celebration or the chance to speak to your friends individually at the celebration. If the player had a romantic partner then the celebration would lead into a more intimate conversation with that partner. THEN you can fade to black.

It seems a little baffling to me that a game so massive and indepth in so, so many ways would then lack giving the player a celebration moment with their friends and if they chose a partner, a more personal and intimate moment with them too when so much went into every other aspect.

The emotional weight and effort put into making us care about these characters means I very much would have expected....something in those last moments?

The main big cutscene of people rising up and the narrator saying how we saved the city and are heroes, that was lovely. I loved that. It's just it felt a really rather hollow victory for me who is much more into the roleplay aspect than anything else when I wasn't given an emotionally satisfying ending to my time with my party members and romanced person.

The threads of the stories are so intricate and the amount of work put into the game throughout is immense and so it makes the lack of heart and a reward of time spent with comrades and lovers at the very end even more noticeable.

(Also this is just coming from a woman deeply, hopelessly in love with a foppish dandy but once all hell has broken loose and the Netherbrain Apocalypse has unleashed, when I would ask Astarion for a kiss I believe the dialogue was always along the lines of 'it may be our last' and his reply would be 'we had best make it count'. I wish that the animation from that point on had been different because the kiss remained the same brief gentle kiss my little tiefling had been receiving the entire time previously. It just didn't fit thematically for such passionate words of making a last kiss before possible death 'count' then a little peck on the lips to follow. As mentioned, this is just the impassioned words of a woman in love with a sassy little man but it's my house and I can say what I like here. I have similar impassioned words about the all too brief cutscene at the very end as mentioned previously too.)

#baldur's gate 3 spoilers #adding that tag just in case people who follow me scroll by

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merci-bitch · 3 years

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Alma Peregrine

“Don’t you dare”

Alrighty then,

Warning (s): slight NSFW warning

A/N: might have been a bad time to start the celebration lol. When you study music here in Sweden like I do, December is so busy it’s insane. We celebrate something called Lucia and it’s much easier if you search it up, but as a high soprano, doing shows from 6am-8pm with high A’s is extremely tiring 🤠

And I fell ill directly after with high fever from the 13th - 21th. What luck I have ! And now I have tests and massive big bomb of exams coming but I can surely promise that these will come out sooner or later :)

I also wanna thank my gals for helping me through it all, and special thanks to lechuga @arewecoolio for helping me achieve this level of brilliance! Hope you all have a great night/day ! XX

It started innocently at first. A fleeting kiss along her jaw before she climbed out of bed. You had climbed out of bed and pretended to not feel the heat of her gaze on you, or the distinct feeling that she wanted to continue that kiss.

The second time was an hour and a half afterwards, again, rather tame. As the children played outside, Alma did her usual rounds, walking around the lawn to ensure everyone was fine and not finding trouble. You were playing referee for Hugh and Millard and caught her gaze. Let your gaze slowly travel down her form lavaciously, then glanced away as if you hadn’t meant for her to see that interaction. Focused on the boys who were locked in an intense game–both tied. And pretended you didn’t see Alma in the corner of your eye stop in her tracks entirely, and stare at the side of your head hard.

—-------- She pulled you aside and locked the study door behind the two of you. Gripped your shirt collar,

“Quit teasing, it’s inappropriate.”

She huffed indignant, and annoyed, but most importantly. Flustered. She glared at you, but the flush to her face undercut what could have been a commanding presence. You smiled apologetically,

“I wasn’t aware I was teasing you.”

Feigned obliviousness and just an edge of hurt and you spoke again,

“I thought I was being rather loving.”

Then brought one of her hands up to your lips, pressed a quick kiss along her palm, and pulled away.

“I promise I’ll leave you alone now.” You said as you bowed down like a real gentleman. Turning around to unlock the door. Alma took in a shaky breath, said in an equally shaky voice.

“Don’t you dare.”

“No?”

She set her jaw, then gripped your shirt again and pulled you into a kiss. Slow and all consuming. Overall, a bruising kiss that left you both breathless and panting. You leaned back against the door, smirking as you crossed your arms.

“My, my, Alma dear.”

“Hush will you.”

That strict facade back on her face, her back straight. Her arms crossed, and she was looking far too unimpressed at you. You scoffed at her, shook your head while a soft smile formed its way to your lips.

“You’re the one who kissed me. Seems like you’re the one who simply cannot get enough of me.”

Alma shot you one of her infamous death glares. The one glare could quiet down every sound in the house. Starring you down with those intimidating eyes of hers. That simply and yet far from simple sharpness to her eyes. you could see the slight hint of pink creeping up her throat. It only widened your forming smirk.

“Feeling a little hot there, Alma?”

Alma looked at you with surprise. You were so openly teasing her, with the children so close by. As if you could read her mind.

“Come now, Alma. They are behind a locked door. All we could do to take care of that little heat, is just pulling the curtains to the side.”

Alma was speechless. You were acting completely inappropriate and not to mention the boldness. She was almost baffled. You’d never spoken like this. Alma started taking small steps backwards as you took small steps towards her. She wasn’t scared of you, no, that wasn’t it. She was tight on her time schedule, you knew that. Her hand itched to check the time. You looked down at her hand then back up at her.

“Go on.”

Alma lifted the watch in her pocket and checked the time, completely distracted by her watch; she didn’t notice you coming closer until she felt your touch and soft lips on hers. Alma went still against you. Her eyes wide and she had dropped her watch. Thankful in mind that there was a little chain stuck inside the fabric of her pocket attached to the watch. Her arms raised to your shoulder length. Unsure of what to until she let herself melt into the kiss, wrapping her arms around your shoulders, tangling a hand in your hair, pulling you closer, wanting more of you. She let herself be desperate, just for a moment. Let herself enjoy the feeling of lust and love. Letting those small sighs out of her throat freely. The sounds so quiet but so harsh, almost like a little growl. Her hands moving to the sides of your face, her sharp talons scratching softly against your skin.

A knock on the door startled you both. Alma pushed herself from you, forgetting for a slight second the door was locked.

“Miss Peregrine? Are you in there?”

“Yes! I will be out in a minute.”

Alma walked over to the mirror hanging by the wall and took herself in. The first few buttons of her dark, marine blue dress coat were open. The white blouse on the inside wrinkled enough you could see the swell of her chest pressing against the tight expand. The warm blush expanding from her chest and all the way up to her cheeks. Alma looked further down her throat and noticed small little marks starting to form. Her eyes went wide and grabbed the nearest object to hit you with. You being lucky it was a piece of paper.

“You little- “

You grabbed her hands, lacing your fingers together. Smiling warmly at her despite her unimpressed eyes.

“You know well enough I say no marks!”

“Alma- “

“What are these?!” Alma pointed to the red spots under her jaw and downwards.

You leant back and admired your work, watching one irritated flushed Alma. Her jaw tensing and her shoulders as well. The swell of her chest pressing more against the restraint of the few buttons left of her jacket as her breathing got shallower.

“Alright, I apologise, but you left more marks on me then I did on you! “

Alma scoffed at you and crossed her arms. Starring you down with that intimidating stare of hers. Another knock on the door startled her. Alma looked herself in the mirror again and started making herself look presentable. Turning back to you, pointing her finger at your chest,

“This conversation isn’t over.”

“I thought you never discussed unpleasant matters. Clearly you found this very enjoyable if you’re willing to discuss it.”

Alma narrowed her eyes at you and pointed her index finger at you before unlocking the door and walking out. Leaving you smirking softly to yourself.

It was later in the evening, after dinner and reset. Alma had been awfully tense during dinner. Her shoulders stiff and her jaw tight. You knew why of course, but the children didn’t; explains the silence at the table. Each time you felt Alma’s eyes on you, you couldn’t help the little grin spreading across your face. You were enjoying yourself far too much for Alma’s liking, she’d kicked you under the table to remove the grin from your face. She was pleased with your pained smile.

You were sitting on the sofa, a book in hand and a soft humming of music filling the silence in the room after hours. You hadn’t the slightest clue where Alma was, you didn’t really mind either. The book was far too interesting to go look for her. You kept saying just one more chapter. Just one more and then you would go look for her. That was until you heard a rumble upstairs. As if something crashed against the floor. Your book long forgotten on the floor as you nearly sprinted upstairs to find the source of the sound.

The door to Claire’s room that she also shared with others was open. Fiona came out and had an apologetic expression written across her features.

“Please don’t be mad Y/N, it was merely an accident that the case fell.”

“Of course I’m not mad. Nobody got hurt I suppose?”

Fiona shook her head and gave you a small reassuring smile.

“I’ll help you clean up and then it’s back to bed, alright?”

Fiona nodded and helped you clean up the glass pieces shattered across the floor. You’d said your goodnight to the girls and closed the door behind you as you walked out. Noticing the door to your shared bedroom with Alma closed. You walked further down the hallway and stepped inside the room, noticing the door to the bathroom slightly closed, steam coming out from the crack. Alma was in the shower.

You got changed yourself and waited for her to finish in the shower. You sat by the window, watching the rain fall down from the dark clouds. Traced the rain drops with your fingers against the window.

“Took you long enough.“

“Hm, I was reading downstairs.”

“You seem far more interested in those books than anything else nowadays.”

You turned around and saw Alma in her dark silk nightgown, sitting by the vanity and brushing through her dark hair.

“Well, those books are very interesting.”

“More interesting than the people surrounding you?” Alma scoffed.

“Oh come now LeFay. You know there’s one thing I find more interesting than those books.”

You’d gotten up from your spot by the window as you spoke, now standing directly behind her. Putting your hands on her shoulders.

“And what’s that?”

You sat down with your back towards the vanity and looked her in the eye.

“You don’t discuss unpleasant matters.”

#alma peregrine x reader #mphfpc

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ddarker-dreams · 4 years

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Sweet Talkin’. Yan Dabi x Reader [COMM]

There’s been an abnormal amount of sirens tonight.

It should be unnerving -- and to an extent it is -- but this isn’t what keeps you awake. Not that, or even the dogs barking outside accompanied with an occasional derogatory yell. With a heavy heart, you can say that you’ve gotten used to all of that noise. No, it’s something different that steals you from the welcoming comfort of a deep slumber.

The thing that truly keeps you up is the anticipation of what is to come. Or more precisely, who.

The bright glow of your phone strains your tired eyes, but it’s your best shot at finding entertainment. Squinting at the blinding light, exhaustion seeps into your being despite your best efforts to ward it off. No matter how much caffeine you drink later on in the day, it’s not enough to to thwart your natural inclinations to sleep.

For most, nighttime is a relaxing time of day that’s coveted. It brings a time of solitude, to reflect and rest up for the next day. While you wish you could return to the days where you felt like that, it’s long behind you now. Instead, you evade sleep, in fear of what could occur when you’re in the defenseless state.

An illusion of control is better than none at all.

“You’re gonna get dark circles under those pretty eyes if you keep staying up this late.”

A deep voice rumbles from the entrance to your shared room, one that you instantly recognize. Even in your groggy state, your emotions heighten in his presence. Turning off your phone and placing it down, you stretch your arms out, a yawn leaving your lips in the process.

So he’s back.

“Yeah, yeah…” you grumble back, caring little for the teasing comment. After feeling around your nightstand, a click resonates, light illuminating your room. Once your eyes adjust, you spot your unwelcome visitor, who makes himself at home. Dabi walks towards you, your bed creaking under his added weight as he sits down. Untying his shoes, he throws them carelessly in the corner.

Sensing your staring, he looks over his shoulder and grins at you. “Awe, you miss me or somethin’? How cute.”

A groan leaves your lips, and you reach to throw a pillow at him. He easily deflects it with a snicker, working on taking his shirt off next. At least now that he’s back you feel more inclined to sleep, knowing that he can’t sneak up on you. Splatters of dark vermilion catch your attention, mouth curling downwards into a frown.

If there’s anything you’ve learned in your time with Dabi, it’s that you shouldn’t ask where the blood stains come from. Ignorance is bliss, right? It’s still an unnerving sight, especially since you know it isn’t his.

The relationship you two share is nothing if not unconventional. His occupation -- if you can even call it that -- has him coming and going at unholy times at night. Sleep is difficult to come by, not knowing when he might make an appearance. It’s what leads you to stay up some nights, a preferable experience to tossing and turning with anxious thoughts plaguing you.

As long as you stay in your designated place, Dabi holds true to his promise of doing you no harm. Thinly veiled threats under the pretense of being your “roommate” lead you to the current day, an awkward routine settling in. For all it’s worth, it could be worse. You’re acutely aware of what Dabi is capable of, having seen the ashes of corpses blurred out in the news.

Why he’s taken a liken to you is beyond you. It still beats dying, only by a sliver.

“There are some leftovers in the fridge,” you tap your phone, reading the time. Three in the morning. Great, and you have work tomorrow too. “I think I’ll give sleeping a shot now that you’re back.”

Dabi raises an eyebrow at this, a fresh shirt without blood stains now on. “You always sleep when I get back. It hurts my feelings. What, am I not good enough company?”

‘If I’m being honest, not really.’

He grins at how you shiver, lazily crawling over to be by your side. His sudden presence fills your nose with unknown scents, ranging from smoke to burnt leather. Underneath is hints of his cologne, all mixing together to disorient you further. Dabi loves riling you up, testing the limits of what you can handle.

You take a deep breath, hugging your knees to your chest. As long as you don’t let it get to you, it’ll be fine. He always gets bored eventually, leaving you to do as you please. That’s what you’ll aim for.

“It’s not that. I just have stuff to do tomorrow, and I don’t like being exhausted. It’s my long shift.”

His trademark grin melts away, furrowing eyebrows and a grimace taking its place. Mentioning your life outside of him is a tricky battle, and you can’t help but regret mentioning it. Being in a sleep deprived state is a major disadvantage in your interactions with him.

“This again? I thought I told you to quit. Rent or whatever won’t be an issue, I’ll handle it.” Dabi scoots closer to you, wrapping an arm around your bare shoulder. His skin feels rough against yours, coarse hands rubbing circles into you. You bite your lip at the sensation, hair on the back of your neck standing.

“I... I like my job. Sure, it can be irritating at times, but it gives me something to do during the day. I’d go stir crazy without something concrete to focus on.” The words are heartfelt, unfiltered. When he responds in silence you worry you’ve made a mistake, upsetting him with your defiance.

He huffs against your neck, lifting his head and shooting you a displeased look. His voice is a low murmur, one that reverberates into the core of your very being. “Always making trouble for me..."

Dabi’s grip around you tightens, and you gulp thickly. With how casual he speaks to you, it can be easy to forget the major power imbalance. Instead of greeting you with insults, or worse, he lightly flicks your forehead.

You blink, baffled.

“Don’t most people hate their jobs? I figured you’d be jumping at the idea of having more free time, or whatever. So you can focus on other things.”

It’s not a confession you were expecting, your cheeks flushing at the considerate nature of his words. While it’s true quitting your job is an appealing thought, it creates a semblance of balance within your now chaotic life. Helping you stick to a schedule, in the same way school used to.

Now feeling confident in expressing yourself, your taut muscles relax into his touch. “I’m too tired to think about it properly, if I’m being honest. I don’t know how you can stay up this late all the time without losing it.”

Deflecting from the previous topic makes you feel better. If Dabi notices your intentions he doesn’t point them out, allowing you to take control of the conversation without complaint. He must prefer it over when you’d just shake and cry in his presence.

“You get used to it, sweetheart,” he drums his fingers against you, smirking. “I’ll make a night owl outta you yet.”

Any implications in his words go straight over your head.

“As tempting an offer as that is, I think I’ll pass. ”

He shrugs at your indifference, removing his arms from your frame. The lack of enveloping warmth causes you to shiver, Dabi searching through his bag. You peak over his shoulder out of curiosity, his scarred hands settling on an object which he pulls out.

It’s a copy of Animal Crossing, in all of its beautiful glory. You wipe your eyes, unsure if what you’re seeing is reality.

“W-what?” you guffaw before your brain has the chance to stop you, jaw agape and head tilted. Dabi places it on your lap, and returns to his previous position of holding you. There’s clear amusement in his eyes at your stunned state, relishing in your every reaction.

“Did I get the wrong thing? This is that game you wanted, isn’t it?”

It had to have been a week or so ago. You lamented to him about not being able to afford this, not even realizing he was giving it any attention. To think he remembered, and acted on it for your sake... is a touching sensation. Maybe he is capable of selflessness after all.

The cute box art puts a smile on your face, one that Dabi stares at.

“I have to say, I’m surprised,” you pick it up, looking at the back with wide eyes. “Did the cashier give you a funny look when you picked this out?”

‘I really need to start thinking before I speak.’

He shakes his head at your blunt comment, not taking any offense. “I didn’t get it that way.”

‘Oh, well... better not ask more than necessary. There’s no blood on it so at least that’s a good sign.’

Wiggling free from his grip, you rotate your legs over the side of the bed, intent on getting your switch. An opportunity like this must be taken advantage of, and you’ve wanted to play this game for some time now. Dabi must’ve read your mind, and pulls you back to him with little effort before you get the chance.

“If I remember correctly, you said you were tired just a few minutes ago.”

He plucks the game from your fingers, and places it on the side furthest from you. What a cruel world this is, to have paradise so close and yet so far. You can’t help the pout that forms at his actions.

“The situation changed, I’m wide awake now.” you explain to an unmoved Dabi, launching over his lap to get your coveted game back. He picks it up, lifting it over your head with a chuckle. So that’s how it’s going to be.

Defeat settling in, you retreat for now. A sigh leaves your lips, arms crossing over your chest. You should’ve known better, Dabi has made it clear to you that he wants your attention. Looks like you’ll have to wait until after work to get a taste of Animal Crossing.

There’s a glint of mischievous in his azure eyes, one that you’ve seen more often than you wish. Dabi sighs in mock hurt, placing a hand over his heart. “Not even so much as a thank you for my efforts. That’s cold, babe. Real cold.”

“I’m sorry, you’re right. Thank you, it means a lot.”

He shakes his head, clicking his tongue. “That’s not what I was looking for. Try again, sweetheart.”

A flurry of thoughts fly through your mind, all competing with one another to offer a solution. Does he want money for it? He should know that you’re not capable of producing that amount, or you would’ve bought the game for yourself. Dabi gives you a moment to think, before offering the answer to you.

He puts his pointer finger on your lip, maintaining eye contact while doing so.

“Oh, t-that.”

“So glad to see that you’re finally catching on.”

It could be the summer heat winning over your AC, the room suddenly feeling warmer than it did a few moments prior. You look down at your blankets, focusing on anything other than the person in front of you. This level of teasing is nothing new with Dabi, he always manages to fluster you.

He sits, relaxed, waiting for you to make a move. There aren’t any other options that you can think of, so you give into what he wants. Moving closer to his face, you feel his warm breath fanning against your skin. Your hand twitches, pressing against his chest to offer balance.

Squeezing your eyes closed, you tilt your head, soft lips brushing over his own. All of your movements are hesitant, your entire body feeling like it’s on fire. Heart pounding violently against your chest, you move to pull back. Only to discover his hand on the back of your head is stopping you from doing so.

Dabi slants his lips back over your own, nibbling your bottom lip. You freeze, the unexpected affection leaving you incapable of reacting. It’s when you squeak that he finally loosens his grip, opening his eyes to take in your embarrassed countenance.

All things considered, it wasn’t an unpleasant experience.

You cover your burning face with your shaking hands, feeling the warmth emanating off of you. He makes it even worse by chuckling, the low rumble filling you with indignation. There never is hope of catching a break with Dabi.

“You might be the one with a fire quirk after all,” he leans forward, placing a hand against your hot forehead. “Mm... that look you’re giving me is too much. You have to be doing it on purpose at this point.”

Fed up with his relentless teasing, you smack his hand away and purse your lips. He props his arms behind his head, letting you glare at him to your heart’s content. From his lack of reaction, you get the feeling he isn’t too intimidated by you.

“Whatever, I’m going to bed,” you huff, returning to your side and pulling up the blankets. He doesn’t make a move to stop you, and you take the opportunity to lay down on your side. Refusing to look at him, you focus on the wall.

Dabi pokes your cheek, which you ignore.

He lets out a long sigh at your antics, joining you underneath the covers. You hear shuffling behind you, and can’t help but wonder what it is that he’s up to. Maybe he’s succumbing to his own exhaustion, and will let you sleep in peace? What a perfect world it’d be if that’s the case.

The thought is entertained for three seconds before you’re pulled against his firm chest from behind, toned arms snaking around your torso and staying there. His body is always so warm. It doesn’t help that you’re already embarrassed from before. Dabi grumbles something incoherent, placing his head in the crook of your neck.

Accepting the situation for what it is, you stop moving. He reaches over you to turn off the light, and darkness surrounds you once more. All you can hear are your own labored breaths, and rapidly pounding heart. It might be impossible to sleep like this.

You’ll call out of work for tomorrow.

“... Dabi?” you whisper, voice soft and barely audible. He grunts in response, nuzzling further into your neck. For the past few months, there’s been a thought that haunts you at every turn. One that you can never find an answer to, and have been too frightened to investigate beyond your own musings.

It’d be easy to play this off as sexual attraction alone, yet a voice in the back of your head says otherwise. That what Dabi feels for you goes beyond that, into a sinister territory that you want desperately to avoid. Why is it he’s patient -- borderline kind -- with you, yet cruel to everyone else? None of it makes logical sense, his actions erratic and seemingly without reason.

Maybe you shouldn’t know. Still, you ask, against your better judgement.

“Why do you like me so much?”

You feel how he smiles against the skin of your neck, the sensation stirring up unknown emotions within. He squeezes you against him once, letting out a low hum as he considers your words. While waiting for him to speak, you hold in a breath.

“Dunno. Just do,” Dabi offers a noncommittal response, one that leaves you greatly unsatisfied. It seems he’s not even aware of it himself, the effect you have on him unlike anything he’s ever experienced. “Don’t worry your pretty little head about it.”

“... Alright, I won’t.”

“Good. Now get some sleep, before I ask you to kiss me again.”

#dabi my hero academia #Dabi #dabi x reader #dabi imagine #dabi headcanons #yandere dabi imagines #yandere dabi #yandere dabi imagine #yandere dabi x reader #bnha #bnha imagines #bnha imagine #bnha x reader #yandere bnha #yandere #my hero academia #my hero academia imagine #yandere my hero academia #commissions

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spookyvalentine · 2 years

Note

Gonna turn your own questions on you again: 3, 11, 19, 20

once again I’m like ough these are not easy answers 😂 who wrote these 🤡

3. What’s Shepard’s love language? What love languages do they respond best to?

starting w stellan bc theyre a little easier. their love languages are acts of service and physical affection. responds best to physical affection, gift giving and words of affirmation (maybe shiala discovers a praise kink MAYBE)

mercy’s truest love language is gossip. dish the drama, girl. (and bizarrely? adores smalltalk). communicates through acts of service, but quality time primarily. is also a gift giver, definitely the type that goes “I picked this up because it made me think of you”. responds best to the same, honestly. doesn’t realize really but very affected by acts of service. bring something right before they’re anticipating it? If you are explicitly clear in your communication (do you include maps, receipts and diagrams?) they’ll fall a bit in love with you. craves quality time

11. What does Shepard think of TIM?

haha ha ha stellan Does Not Like tim, and has never learned how to disguise an emotion (outside a kepesh-yakshi board) finds themself being unusually pigheaded, resistant, and suspicious. bickers every move with tim til he hangs up, frustration overwhelming any attempts at articulation, only for stellan to hack through and continuing to dissect him verbally. he totally starts shouting, completely out of character. stellan is gleeful about it, but also angry about how angry they are

mercy has this curious habit where they can be friends with someone they don’t like. it’s easy, for them, to be friendly with (and liking!) someone they don’t trust. they can find something interesting to admire in everybody. i think maybe only aria understands. so mercy sort of loathes everything about tim, but is just like who are you. why are you like this. i have nothing better to do, let’s get coffee. sure, i’ll have a cigarette. can appreciate how’d he’d got all those fingers in so many pies and also hate how he’s choosing to spend funds and disagree with his priorities. is entertained by his jabs and pointed comments, and aims even lower. goes “this bitch” when they see tim’s caller id before picking up and having an hour long conversation (tim is definitely baffled by mercy. (honestly was expecting them to react more like stellan) mercy doesn’t hesitate shooting him in the kneecaps at the citadel before making him explain himself while sitting on the ground) they’ve never felt betrayed by him simply because they’ve never trusted him

19. What was Shepard’s first interaction with an alien?

i really haven’t thought about it til now. both of em spent their childhood with humans—stellan in the commune in mindoir, and mercy in and out of the streets and foster homes on earth

stellan’s out going to tons of kepesh-yakshi tournaments as a kid, (and watched tons of vids of legendary games) so they are familiar with aliens before actually having a face to face interaction. i think the first alien is a turian kid that they blast away at a tournament.

for mercy… I think their first alien interaction is as a teenager. in new orleans on a job w kasumi. watching the mark, and sees they have an asari commando bodyguard

20. List five songs your Shepard is currently listening to

stellan is a big fan of anything that gets them up and dancing. loves synths wholeheartedly. fuckin owns at the karaoke bar

sussudio, phil collins

pamela, toto

walking in memphis, cher

nothing’s gonna stop us now, starship

i wanna dance with somebody, whitney

(+1, wild montana skies, john denver + emmylou harris, because i feel like this is Them)

mercy listens to everything out there, and preferences depend on mood. here’s a little sample of the playlist mercy is working their way down w edi on those nights sleep eludes them. they’re on the “epics and power ballads” part of her musical education

voodoo child, jimi hendrix

baba o’riley, the who

i heard it through the grapevine, ccr

rime of the ancient mariner, iron maiden

achilles last stand, led zeppelin

(bonus: this kiss, faith hill)

#ask me about the love song playlist mercy puts together for edi #they also love all stellans collection #listen #the two of them would sing #unworthy of your love from assassins #as their opening karaoke act #is stellan a total pillow princess?#signs point heavily to yes #also it’s supposed to be the voodoo chile version (like fifteen min vs six)#but YouTube was being difficult sigh #oc: mercy shepard #oc: stellan shepard #themshep #commander shepard #mass effect

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streetlight11 · 3 years

Text

Deep Scar

Summary: He used to be the popular kid in high school where everyone has a crush on him. He always gets Valentine's Day gifts be it presents, chocolates, homemade brownies, etc. He somehow brought his name to college where there were people who still finds him attractive. What happens when he bumps into a girl who treated him a lot different compared to others? Will he find out the truth behind her behaviour?

Theme: college au, childhood schoolmates but with a bad past

Genre: a little angsty, fluff ending though

Warnings: mild swearing (literally just one word), slight mention of harassment but nothing too crazy

WC: 4.6k

Pairing: Han Jisung x Fem!Reader

a/n: Hey hey :) I've had this in my google drive for quite sometime so my writing might not be so good here but bear with me. P.S the words in italics are his flashback, and hannie might sound like a jerk at one point but this doesn't portray him in real life because irl he's an absolute sweetheart :') Anyways, enjoy reading!

Coming to campus every morning only to find gifts and plenty of love letters in his locker has been becoming a daily routine for Jisung. Although he has never actually reciprocated any of them, he must admit that he did love the amount of attention that’s been drawn to him since back in high school.

He was the popular kid in school where he was known for his intelligence, charming personality and of course, his good looks.

Back in high school, girls would often slot in their confession letters in his locker almost everyday. Every Valentine’s Day, his table would be filled with chocolates and homemade brownies specially for him.

But all of those gifts would eventually be passed to his close friends for them to finish it for him.

Even now when he’s already in college, words spread around the campus of his status back in Saebom High, making everyone in Hankuk College know about him. Despite this new set of attention that was being directed towards him, he managed to make friends with a few people that he trusts.

Some of them were his classmates in college, some were his friends from music class, and some were his good friends back in high school.

That day was no different as he walked down the hall to go to his designated locker, only to find a pink paper that had been folded into a cute little heart.

“Another love letter? Dude, at this point you should really date one of them so that this whole shenanigan would stop.” Chan said with a soft chuckled as Minho and Jeongin nodded in agreement with the elder boy. Jisung rolled his eyes as he unfolded the paper and read the confession, that was pretty much the same as the other notes he received.

All of which, never got reciprocated simply because Jisung believes he hasn’t found anyone that peaked his interest yet.

After about 5 minutes, he slammed his locker shut as the four boys began to walk down the hall, not missing the constant shy giggles and whispers from every direction. Jisung simply walked with his charming smile plastered on his face, making some girls feel their heart flutter in their chest.

Just when they had made a left turn, a figure smaller than them came crashing straight into Jisung’s shoulder, causing both individuals to stumble back a step from the impact.

“Watch where you’re going, dumbass.” The girl who was rubbing her shoulder said as she locked eyes with him firmly. Jisung was slightly baffled as no other girl would even dare to look at him straight in the eye.

“Excuse me?” He said, his voice clearly confused but the girl simply rolled her eyes at him, slightly annoyed.

“You heard me. I don’t have to say it twice.”

“Do you even know who I am?” He asked, slowly starting to feel anger boiling through his veins.

“Do you think I care?” She taunts.

“Other girls would be scrambling away by now.”

“Oh, how exciting. Next time, wear side goggles so you can watch where you’re going.” Was all she said before she shoves past him to continue her journey down the hall to go to her class.

Everyone in that hallway was surprised with their little interaction. Some of them even snickered at her for behaving that way in front of him. As far as he knows, all the girls in school never dared to speak to him in person, nor would they even look at him straight in the eyes for they would either run away in embarrassment, or their face would turn flushed red.

Jisung tried not to think much of it as he continued his walk to his class.

During lunch, the boys had gathered at their usual table. However, Hyunjin and Seungmin were running slightly late this time. They were just a few bites into their meal when Hyunjin’s voice caught everyone at their table’s attention.

“Hey guys! Is it okay if our new friend joins us? She just transferred here so me and Seungmin offered her to have lunch with us.”

At the mention of a female, Jisung whips his head around, only to lock eyes with the same girl he bumped into just a few hours prior.

“You again? Try not to miss your mouth this time when you eat.” She said as her gaze locked on Jisung, leaving him speechless.

Hyunjin and Seungmin exchanged glances at each other in confusion but decided to just carry on with lunch as they ended up sitting with her. If she weren’t too direct, Jisung could almost agree that she was acting quite the opposite towards Hyunjin and Seungmin. Maybe with the others as well. She seemed genuinely friendly and almost effortlessly bright with them.

If he was being honest, it almost upsets him that she treated him like an outcast as compared to the rest of his close friends. Days slowly but surely became weeks as she started to grow visibly close to Hyunjin and Seungmin probably because they were her classmates.

It was a Friday evening and they all decided to go to a pool bar where they had pool tables for people to play and also have light drinks if they wanted to.

They rented out two tables for themselves as they divided into two teams.

“Y/N! Join our team!” Hyunjin called as Y/N giggled, only for her to catch Jisung staring at her from one of the high stools beside the bar.

“I’ll join if he does.”

She said as she nodded her head towards Jisung, only for the others to immediately drag him to Hyunjin’s pool table. The game soon started as Hyunjin served first. She seems to surprise them everytime she serves because all her shots were smooth and almost effortless. It was as if she’s done this multiple times.

“Wow, how are you so good at this?” Seungmin asked as she smiled at him, only to answer his question.

“I guess I’m pretty good at aiming.”

The boy giggled as they watched Hyunjin score a ball. All the while, Jisung was silently watching her by the side.

Not in a creepy way but more like in a confused way. After they finished their one hour at the pool bar, they left to get dinner but she decided to call it a day for her and that she needed to go home to feed her starving kitty.

The boys bid her goodbye as she left, only for Changbin to question his friend.

“Jisung ah, you cannot tell me you’re not the slightest bit intrigued by her…”

With that, Jisung frowned as his mind came swirling back to all the times they’ve hung out with her and gotten to know her better. From all the mean comments tossed at each other like they were flat bread, to the time where she seemed genuinely concerned when Jisung nearly got run over by a speeding truck.

“No… No I’m not.”

Only he knows that it was a total lie but he wasn’t going to admit it to his friends.

His ego was too high for him to easily admit that after all these years of girls trying so hard to win his attention, all he needed was Y/N to come into the picture and that was all it took for him to finally fall for someone.

Nobody needed to know his true feelings for her. He didn’t think it would be much of a big deal so he opted to keep his feelings to himself. It was another week into April, when Chan decided to invite them over to his apartment to hang out and chill on a chilly Saturday. Chan of course included Y/N in the list, hence the reason why she was currently standing outside his apartment door.

She was wearing a brown fitted crop top, her favourite denim ripped skinny jeans, a bomber jacket and her white converse.

She was greeted by Chan as he opened the door wider for her to enter.

She made it inside only to find Felix and Minho challenging each other in a game of Mario Kart Race. Hyunjin, Seungmin and Changbin were busy playing Call Of Duty on their phones. Jisung, Jeongin and Chan were in the kitchen, cooking up some hot kimchi stew.

Y/N took off her jacket as she went to snuggle in between Changbin and Hyunjin, watching them play an intense game of COD.

She was just laying her head on Changbin’s shoulder when he jerked forward, making her body shake as he turned to Hyunjin and high fived him after winning first place. Just then, he noticed the sad pout on her face at the loss of warmth, making him giggle as he sat back down to let her rest her head on his shoulder again before he whispered.

“Sorry baby.” She giggled as she pinched his abs, making him squeak. He laughed as he corrected himself.

“I’m just kidding.”

She smiled as she nuzzled into his shoulder while they were all occupied with doing their own things. A few minutes later, the 3 boys from the kitchen came back to the living room with the pot of kimchi stew and a rice bowl.

However, Y/N didn’t miss the subtle frown on Jisung’s face when he saw her leaning her head against Changbin’s shoulder.

The 9 of them began eating diligently as they fit in almost any possible topic they could think off. After they finished their meal, she offered to wash the dishes since they were all busy. Chan told her not to trouble herself but she insisted on helping him.

She was scrubbing the second last bowl when she heard Jeongin’s voice calling from the living room.

“Noona! Come join us after you’re done washing the dishes okay? We’re gonna play truth or drink!”

“Okay Jeonginie.” She sang in a sing-song tune as she could hear some of them chuckle in the back.

As promised, she joined them after she was done with the last bowl, only to sit in between Minho and Seungmin. They went in a circle starting from Chan. It was in a circle until it reached her, only for Changbin to eagerly raise his hand.

“Oh! Oh! I have a good one!” Changbin said as his inner corner of the lips curved up into a cute smile, making her giggle.

“If you could go back to your past, what is the one thing that you would choose not to do?” His question was good. It was theoretical but good.

Suddenly, her eyes just instantly found Jisung’s soft brown ones as she told them her answer.

“The one thing I would choose not to do? Probably allowing myself to think that whatever people said to me was true.”

The guys started to frown as they asked if something bad happened to her back then but she simply shrugged them off and told them to continue the game. It went on until it was Jisung’s turn, only for Y/N to speak up.

“I have something I wanna ask him.”

This came as a surprise for the others but they let her do the honours anyway.

“Do you remember the girl who confessed to you back in high school?” She said. His eyebrows began to link together as he frowned at her sudden question.

“Huh?”

“The one where you rejected her confession by humiliating her in front of the whole school?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Think harder.” She said.

Suddenly, memories start to flood in his mind like a flash flood.

“H-Hi. I made these for you. I hope you like cupcakes. I k-know a lot of other girls do this for you too, b-but… I-I just thought maybe I should give you something too. I- umm, I like y-you Han Jisung.” The girl confessed as she held out the box filled with her homemade cupcakes that she took time to bake for him the night before.

She bit the inside of her cheeks nervously as she diligently avoided his gaze. Just when she saw his arms reaching out to her thinking he was going to take the box from her, he forcefully smashed the box down making it slip out of her hands.

The students around them began to laugh as Jisung lifted a brow at her.

“Did you really think I’d accept your confession? Look at you. Who would date a girl who ties their hair in pigtails, have her tummy sticking out of her uniform shirt and constantly push the bridge of your spectacles up every 5 minutes? Have you seen yourself in a mirror? Nobody will ever fall for you.”

With that being said, he kicked the metal box away to reveal the fallen cupcakes as he went ahead and stepped on them like it was an insect.

The whole school laughed at her as she ran to the girls bathroom and locked herself in there as she cried her heart out. She was only 13 so it was slightly depressing for her to go through this terrible rejection.

Not only did he reject her in cold blood, he also humiliated her in front of everybody in the process. However, what made her even more upset is the fact that he didn’t seem to feel the slightest bit of remorse for saying those things to her.

That memory was as clear as day as he winced at the thought of how immature he was back then. Nevertheless, he didn’t forget the question he got from Y/N as he went ahead to answer her.

“Yeah… Yeah I remember…”

“Do you remember what you said to her?” Her voice softened as she kept her eyes on him while the rest of them had their eyes trained back and forth between Jisung and her.

“I said… I said she should look at herself in the mirror and that no one will ever fall for her.”

The boys were shocked by how harsh he was to that said girl. Y/N could only smile sadly to him as she slowly continued.

“Do you feel bad saying those things to her now?”

Without much thought, he replied something that broke her heart.

“Why should I?” With that, she tried to hold back her tears as she looked at him dead in the eye before saying these next few words.

“Looks like you’re still that same cocky bastard huh?”

She soon got up from her seat on the floor, only to grab her things to leave when Jisung stood up to grab her wrist, stopping her from taking any more steps further.

“What are you talking about?” He asked, now genuinely confused as to what was going on.

“You’re really dense for someone as arrogant as you.” A scoff left her lips as her eyes bore into his, hoping he understood what she meant. After what felt like forever, Jisung finally realized as it was as though his life just flashed before his eyes.

“Wait… that was you?!” His voice was loud as it was laced with confusion and slight disappointment.

“And what happens if I say yes? Are you gonna ask me if I’ve looked into the mirror and realize that no one will ever fall for me?”

Her words stinged like venoms as he winced yet again but this time, at how hurt she seemed. She didn’t realise this but her tears were no longer held back as a few droplets rolled down her cheeks.

“Your words hurted me back then. So I tried to ignore it and move on. But when you said your answer just now, I realized that maybe you really are just an arrogant jerk.”

She finally pulled her arm out of his grasp as she left without sparing a glance to the others. Jisung has never felt so utterly remorseful, today was the first time. He mentally scolded himself for saying those words back when he was young and immature.

He has never felt so fucked up before, this was definitely the first.

A few days went by, Y/N hasn’t talked to either of the boys, not even Hyunjin and Seungmin. Every time Jisung tried to reach out to her, she would always successfully avoid him. It has been almost 2 weeks since they last talked to her as the boys agreed to go release their stress by going to the downtown club.

They had booked a booth for all 8 of them as they sat in there with some girls coming back and forth to try and get laid with either one of them.

Just then, Jisung’s eyes seemed to scan the room only to see a familiar figure dancing freely on the dance floor. He frowned as he rubbed his eyes to make sure they weren’t playing tricks on him.

He double confirmed that it was in fact Y/N, as he got up and left the booth ignoring the boy’s calls.

Right when he was about to reach the dance floor, he saw her deliberately get dragged through the sweaty, intoxicated humans and towards the back door. He followed them close behind as he saw her struggling to free herself from the man’s hold.

The minute she was out the back, the man pushed her against the brick wall as he attacked her neck forcefully.

“Stop!” She begged.

The man ignored as he started to caress her waist and moved up.

“Stop it!” She tried again as tears started to roll down her cheeks desperately.

The minute she managed to put a distance between herself and the man, the metal back door swung open harshly only for her to lock eyes with Jisung as he rushed down the steps, only to land a solid punch to the man’s jaw.

The man fell to the ground drunkenly as he struggled to stand back up.

“What the fuck man? Get your own girl!” The man said as he grabbed Y/N’s wrist and was about to pull her when Jisung roughly shoved him off again.

The man threw a few drunk punches to Jisung and soon they were both in a fist fight. The two males were starting to have blood clots and bruises all over their bodies and faces when Hyunjin and Changbin came to stop the fight.

“Jisung! Jisung! That’s enough!” Hyunjin yelled as they both grabbed Jisung by his arms and pulled him back.

“Don’t ever touch her again.” Jisung growled as the man stumbled back into the club.

Y/N frowned as she visibly hugged herself, only to see Hyunjin and Changbin give Jisung a subtle nod before they both went back inside, giving privacy to Jisung and Y/N. Once they were alone in the dark alley, that’s when she spoke up.

“Why did you come? Afraid someone might fall for me?”

“You clearly weren't comfortable with him.”

“So what? Why do you care? It’s not like he would fall in love with me. Who am I for someone to even like me? Right?”

Jisung frowned as he called out her name softly but she was quick to intercept.

“I didn’t go to Hankuk to get back at you for what you did to me. Never in a million years did I think I’d even see you again. But now that you’re standing here in front of me, that very day comes back to haunt me again. Because of your words, I have been so afraid of falling for someone, even just a tiny crush. That’s what you did to me Han Jisung and I don’t think I can ever forgive you for that.”

With that being said, she turned in her heels and left. Jisung stood there like an idiot as he cursed himself for letting her walk away yet again.

If this happened back in high school, he would probably laugh at her. But now that he was actually starting to like her, he has never felt so upset and disappointed. This was probably even worse than a break up.

She refused to speak to him for days after as she avoided everyone in the friend group.

It was a gloomy Friday night as she was laying on her couch sideways, watching a sappy romantic movie to drown her sadness. She was wearing a loose sweater that made it look like a dress on her. Her calf high socks and a pair of shorts she always wore to sleep.

She had just thought about what she could get for supper when there was a knock on her door.

“Who the hell comes at a time like this?” She thought to herself as she went over to her door and opened it without checking the peephole first. She almost stumbled as she locked eyes with the same pair of brown orbs that she’s been trying so hard to avoid for the past few weeks.

“Jisung? What are you doing here?” She asked, genuinely shocked at how he knew her address.

“Y/N, can we talk?”

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

“Please just hear me out. I don’t need you to say anything, I just need you to listen.”

She fell silent for a moment before she opened the door wider for him to enter. Once inside, he followed her to her living room, only for them to sit 3 feet apart. She urged him with a slight nod as he took a deep breath and soon began.

“Look. I know whatever I did to you back then was horrible. It was my ego talking. I didn’t know any better. We were so young… How could I possibly feel bad at the time when all I thought was to reject you?”

Just then, she cut him in by saying something that made him rethink his choices.

“You’re telling me that everything you said to me meant nothing to you just because it wasn’t you who received it?”

“I… I wasn’t thinking. I was young-”

“Bullshit. Even a 5 year old kid knows what’s nice and what’s hurtful to say to others. Don’t pull the young card on me.”

“Y/N please-”

“Get out. If you’re still gonna be the same arrogant, highly egoistic jerk then get out. You’ve said things that left a deep scar in my life and here you are saying it doesn’t mean anything? Get out.”

“Y/N-”

“I said get out!” She finally screamed as her chest was heaving, her tears streaming down her face in anger but she didn’t care. She got up as she dragged him to the door, while he tried to fight back. The minute he was out, she slammed the door behind her only to lock it as she found herself sliding down the door, only to sit on the wooden floor.

Her cries were soft, but they were filled with so much pain. On the other side of the door, Jisung could hear her cries as he too kneeled on the ground with his hands against the door.

He could hear her loud and clear as he felt his heart shatter into a million pieces. He couldn’t bear to say a word to her as he remained quiet.

The next morning, Y/N woke up suddenly wanting to get herself breakfast to clear her memory from last night. She got out of bed, took a warm shower, got changed into her sweatpants, a big hoodie and a cap. She unlocked her door and had just taken a step outside when she jumped at the slight of Jisung seated on the ground beside her apartment door.

Since he was a light sleeper, the sound of her door opening, woke him up as he quickly got on both feet.

Before she could re-enter her apartment, he pressed his palms against the door to prevent her from closing it as he spoke up softly.

“Y/N, please, please let me explain.” He begged as she wasn’t sure why but she decided to let him in. Once he was inside, they didn’t even bother to go anywhere further into her apartment as he stood by the door and began to explain himself.

“Y/N, please listen to me. I know what I did was bad. At the time, I didn’t realise how humiliating it was for you. But now that I’m an adult, I realized that my actions were extremely horrible and I would never, ever do that to anyone now.” He paused before he continued on.

“I know that whatever I said and did back then, I can’t take any of it back. And I don’t blame you for not forgetting or forgiving me for it. I admit that I deserve this from you. All I ask is for you to give me another chance to start over. But I understand if you want nothing to do with me.” He said with a tiny hope laced in his voice although he wasn’t so confident that she would forgive him this time.

She knew he felt guilty for whatever he did back then so it wasn’t wrong for her to give him a second chance right?

“How would I know you’re not just acting this way to set me up for humiliation again?” She asked.

“Would I say all those things and bring my ego down just to prove that I felt like utter shit after everything you told me, only to humiliate you even further?”

“Nobody knows what your ego is capable of.”

“If my words won’t convince you, would my actions do?”

“What if you do it, only to leave and tell on me to everyone else?”

“I can’t seem to get your trust now, can I?”

“Try being in my shoe and you’ll know.”

“Y/N please… I know I left a deep scar on you emotionally and mentally back then, but please… I beg you, please just… let me start over. I need you to trust me just this once.”

“Fine. But if you abuse my trust, I’m never speaking to you again.”

“Believe me, you have no idea how fucked up I felt that night at Chan’s.”

Right after he finished his sentence, he didn’t waste anymore time as he reached up to cup her face in both hands and soon kissed her. She instantly melted against his body as he pulled her closer by the waist. His kisses were so gentle, as if he was afraid he would break her again.

His touch was soft as he slid his hands under her shirt only to draw random patterns onto her waist.

Just then, he pulled away from her lips but it was so addicting he couldn’t help but peck her lips one last time before he spoke up.

“I’m really, really sorry Y/N for everything back then. I couldn’t help but feel like complete shit after that night when I found out that was you. You don’t have to forgive me, I totally understand.”

Y/N just smiled as she gently tangled her fingers in his hair at the nape of his neck before she spoke up.

“Would I have let you kiss me if I was still mad?”

He remained quiet as she then continued.

“Besides, I’m giving you a chance to redeem yourself so please, don’t take advantage of this.” She warned gently.

Jisung kissed her for slightly longer before he pulled away and whispered against her lips.

“I promise.”

With that, she smiled as she wrapped her arms around his waist, burying her face in his chest while he snaked his arms around her smaller figure.

Ever since then, Jisung did everything he could to redeem himself for what he did to her back in high school. She slowly began to fall for him as she gave him a solid second chance and she could see how genuine he was now whenever he did something nice for her. Even if he didn’t say it out loud, she knew that he really tried his best to win her heart. And it worked.

~~~

#stray kids scenarios #stray kids imagines #stray kids han jisung #stray kids han scenarios #skz han jisung #skz jisung #skz jisung scenarios #skz jisung imagines

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anagentinwriting · 4 years

Text

Lifeline - Part 5

Summary: (First Responders!AU) Moving to Los Angeles and living with your brother, Thor, was never part of your plan nor was being a 9-1-1 dispatcher, but plans change when you are faced with your own emergencies. In your case, it was leaving behind a relationship that wasn’t as perfect as it seemed. Will this be the fresh start you were hoping for or will your past find a way to catch up with you?

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Odinson!Sister Reader

Word Count: 4500+

Warnings: Language, drinking, angst, fluff

Lifeline Masterlist / Main Masterlist

After a week of taking call after call, it was nice to get together with the girls. It wasn’t going to be a late-night, but after last weeks rough call, you just wanted to get out of your head and blow off some steam with Nat and Carol at Happy’s Hydrant.

The Hydrant was the place to be tonight. You couldn't remember it ever being this busy, but it was a Friday night. There were always women hoping to get with a man in uniform and men hoping to get lucky with a badass woman first responder. For some, it worked like a charm, but for others, while they had to work a little harder to get some action.

You leaned against your pool cue, watching Nat lineup her stick to the corner pocket with Carol observing from the side, sipping on her beer. Nat took the shot but missed the pocket, forcing a smirk across your lips. Nat stood up straight, rolling her eyes at you.

“Can’t win them all,” you teased, eyeing the table to find your next shot.

Billards was your bar game. When you were attending New York University, you worked at a bar and hustled to make a few extra bucks. Guys would often undermine you at first, but you weren’t afraid to show them what you could do.

“Hey, sweet thing, you like playing pool,” a guy said behind you as you leaned over to take a shot.

“It seems that way, doesn’t it,” you replied, rolling your eyes. He placed a hand on your lower back, making you tense up and let out a sharp breath. You stood up straight and turned around to face him. He was standing closer to you than you expected, and you could smell the overconsumption of alcohol on his breath.

“I’ll bring the balls if you bring your rack.” He bit his lip, his eyes drifting to your chest.

“You sure you have the balls to handle me because that line was fucking terrible.”

“Do you want to find out?”

“No.”

“Come on, girl.” He stepped even closer to you, making the back of your thighs hit the pool table. He placed his hands on your hips, and you froze in place. Your heart pounded, feeling every nerve in your body firing, telling you to run, but your mind filled with fear. You squeezed your eyes shut, trying to get away from those thoughts, but deep down, you knew one wrong move or smartass remark would make things worse.

“Can you...Can you please get your hands off of me,” you gulped, letting out a shaky breath.

“What’s that sweetheart?”

“Get your hands off of her asshole. She’s not interested,” Nat's voice hit your ears, and you felt the weight in front of you disappear.

“Yeah, take a walk prick,” Carol shouted beside you. You opened your eyes to see the asshole retreating away, letting out a relieved breath. “How you holding up, girl?”

You shrugged. “I’ll be fine. Sorry, I kind of froze up there.”

“Don’t apologize, dude was an asshole. You’re still trying to find yourself and get your confidence back,” Carol replied, patting you on the shoulder. “You’ll find it, and when you do, we’ll be right there with you.” You nodded, crossing your arms across your chest. “If you’re interested, Val teaches a self-defense class, well it’s more of a boxing class at Jabari Tribe Training Center. We could even go with you,” Carol offered, earning a nod from Nat.

“I’ll think about it.” You shrugged, staring at the floor.

“You know what, girls, this calls for shots,” Nat commented. “I’ll be back.” She disappeared to the bar, being greeted by a few guys offering to buy her the shots.

“Hey, YN.” You peeked up at Carol before your eyes drifted back to the floor. “Promise me you won’t let that asshole ruin your night.”

“I promise.”

“Good. And not all guys are like him; some are just drunk assholes who think just because they wear a uniform, every woman wants to sleep with them when really they aren’t interested,” She sighed, staring at you. “How about we start another game then?”

“Um...yeah, let’s do it.”

______

“YN, why can’t you let me win for once?” Carol whined, leaning against her pool cue.

“Practice more, and then maybe you'll have a chance,” you smirked, feeling better after a couple of shots and another beer later.

You lined up to sink the number 8 ball in the corner pocket when someone out of the corner of your eye caught your attention. You gulped, turning your head in their direction to find Fireman Rogers. “You’re sort of ruining my concentration with your staring.”

“Didn’t know I had that effect on you.”

You scoffed, taking the shot and missing the pocket. “That’s on you.” You didn’t miss the slight nod from him and the ever-growing grin appearing on Carol’s face, watching the two of you interact.

“Ouch!” He held a hand over his heart, smirking at you.

You watched Carol sink one of her three remaining stripes into the pocket but failed to get the other two in. You nodded to yourself, setting yourself up to get the number 8 ball in the same corner pocket. Shooting a quick glare towards Steve, he held up his hands, trying to hide his smile by taking a sip of his beer. You hit the white ball, sending it right towards the number 8 ball, sinking it into the corner pocket.

“Well...that’s game. Rogers, you’re up. Time for you to take on the champ.” Carol walked over to him, forcing the pool cue to his chest until he grabbed it, and she shot you a quick wink over her shoulder before disappearing into the crowd.

“Smooth,” you whispered under your breath.

“What was that?” Steve questioned, leaning a little closer to you.

“Bring it, Rogers.”

_______

With one last hit, the number 8 ball sunk into the center pocket. “And with that, the champ remains the champ. Good game though, you weren’t...bad.”

“Not bad, huh? Maybe you caught me on an off day.”

“Will save the rematch for another day then.” You put the pool cue back on the wall and went to your usual table, taking a seat on one of the high stools. You take a sip of your beer, noticing Steve taking the chair across from you.

“How did you get so good at pool?”

“I worked at a bar in college and got really good at it. Even hustled a few people to get some extra cash.”

“Did they deserve it?” He asked with a chuckle.

“Of course,” you smirked, taking a sip of your drink. Your eyes traveled around the bar, spotting your brother with a group of ladies. It still baffled you how he could finagle himself into any group, whether it was to make friends or take someone home. In this incident, it looked to be taking someone home. Thor wrapped his arm around one of the ladies and headed out the door. “Well, I’m in no rush to get home now.”

“Why is that?”

“My brother just walked out the door with his latest conquest.” His eyes traveled to the door. “Now in the morning, I will have to make small talk with her, and poor Darryl is gonna have to hear them…” you shake your head, not finishing the sentence. “Good thing I got him noise-canceling headphones.”

“Good thing.”

“How are you liking the 107 so far?”

“It’s...” Steve started only to be interrupted by Sam.

“Okay, so Thor just left with the woman I was hitting on all night. Can’t your brother give another brother a chance,” Sam added, taking a swig of his beer.

“That’s my brother for…”

“Steve, I heard you just got your ass handed to you in pool. Way to go, girl.” Bucky held up his hand, and you high-fived him. “Steve’s good. He always kicks my ass.”

“Well, that’s because you suck at it,” Sam added.

“Well, at least I can get a woman to go home with me.”

“That’s cold.”

“You can’t get every woman to go with you,” Nat added, taking the stool next to yours.

“Wanna bet.” Bucky licked his lips, earning a scoff from Nat. “Listen here, everyone. I am about to share Mr. Barnes Fling Tips 401. That’s right, this is senior college level, no freshman 101.” He takes a drink of his beer. “First: Get the lovely woman’s attention; catch her eye at the bar, smile at her, send her a drink, whatever you need to do to get her to notice you. Number two: once she notices you, disappear for a little while to see if she looks for you. Then, when she least expects it, go over to her and introduce yourself. Then, this is where the real flirting happens; smirk at her, put a hand on her thigh, bite your lip, any of the telltale signs you’re interested. Then finally, she will take your hand, and that’s when you take her home. We both have meaningless sex and then move on. We both get exactly what we wanted.”

“You’re terrible.” Nat rolled her eyes, crossing her arms across her chest.

“Says the female version of me,” he smirked.

“You wish, because then maybe, just maybe, I would give you the time of day and sleep with you. But, you’re not worth it. I don’t think I could ever sink low enough to sleep with you.”

“Ouch, doll, ouch.” He held his hand over his heart, feigning hurt in his eyes.

“I would feel bad, but we both know you don’t have a heart when it comes to women.”

“One right after another. You’re on fire, Red.”

“I don’t have time for this. Come on, YN, let's go get another drink.” Nat grabbed your hand and pulled you to the bar with her.

“Is it just me, or was that a whole lotta sexual tension right there?” Sam asked Steve as soon as Bucky stormed off.

“I would say so,” Steve nodded in agreement.

________

You classified yourself as a people watcher, and you always found it interesting to watch people interact with one another. You'd often see the people looking to hookup. A bachelorette party with an overly flirty bride to be who may or may not make a mistake tonight. Those people who came out to drink for fun; those that drink because they have a problem; the new parents that needed to get out of the house, or the couple still getting to know one another. You never met any of these people in your life, but you couldn’t help but create their life story.

It was like the couple sitting close together in the booth to your right. They were falling for each, whether they planned it or not. It was easy to tell with the way they looked at each other. You felt that way once, too. The feeling that you and him were the only two in a crowded room. You thought it was love, but looking back, maybe it was something different. Something toxic, like a poisonous gas entering the air without you knowing, and sooner or later, you're gasping, trying to find the last bit of oxygen. But, it’s no use because you’re trapped, and every breath you take only makes you weaker and unable to move, and eventually, it ends up taking everything from you.

“Hi, again.” Steve takes a seat on the stool next to you at the bar, pulling you out of your head. “Everyone keeps leaving me, and I didn’t want to look like that loser in the bar sitting by himself.”

“So you came over to join me? Who was sitting by herself looking like a loser?”

“Yeah, but now we can be losers together,” he chuckled, making you smirk.

“Speak for yourself,” you chuckled, picking at the label on the beer bottle.“You and Bucky became fast friends.”

“Yeah, well, we have known each other since we were kids.”

“Wait, you grew up here?” You turned your heads towards him, narrowing your eyes at him.

“No in Brooklyn. Brooklyn, New York.”

“Get out--” you hit him on the arm “--I used to live in Brooklyn.”

“Really? Small world,” he smiled, leaning in a little closer to you to hear you better over the music playing on the jukebox. “What made you move out here?”

“Story for another time,” you pointed the tip of your beer bottle at him.

He nodded, “So why a 9-1-1 dispatcher?”

“You’re full of questions, aren’t you, Steve?”

He shrugged with a small chuckle. “A few.”

“Did you get dragged out tonight, too?” You asked, taking a sip of your beer.

“What makes you think that?”

“Think it was so our friends could get a little action.” Your eyes traveled around the bar to see Bucky leaving with a redhead, and Nat had her hand on a guy's bicep with a flirty expression on her face. You had no idea where Carol went, and Sam must’ve left after realizing his luck ran out. Poor guy.

“So it would seem,” he smirked, glancing around the room.

You felt your phone vibrate, and you glanced down, seeing a message from Nat.

Nat: Heading out! Hope you can find a way home ;)

YN: Yeah, it’s called an Uber

Nat: (rolling eyes emoji)

“And with that, my ride just left.” You locked your phone, sliding it back into your pocket.

“Yeah, my ride left about five minutes ago.” Steve sighed, staring at his beer bottle. “What do you say about getting out of here?”

You glanced at him underneath your eyelashes. “I hope you know you're not getting in my pants.”

“Oh, I know, I didn’t mean it like that, but maybe another time,” he winked, forcing you to crack a smile.

“Smooth, Rogers. Smooth,” you commented. “And here I thought you were a goody-to-shoes.”

“Most people do, but I am far from it.”

“I am seeing that now,” you chuckled, swallowing the little bit left in your drink. He nodded, glancing around the bar. “Are you ready?”

“For what?”

“To get out of here?”

“I didn’t mean…” His head snapped to you with raised eyebrows.

“I know, another time,” you teased, seeing the corner of his mouth turn up. “Are you coming because your half-full beer says otherwise?”

He looked at it, then back over at you. Something in his blue eyes shifted from playful to curious in a matter of seconds. “Let's blow this popsicle stand,” Steve smirked, downing the rest of his drink.

“Easy there, don’t want to have to carry you out of here,” you commented as he reached behind him and slipped on his jacket.

“Haha.”

You felt the chill in the air as soon as you walked out the front door of the bar. It felt like fall was just around the corner, and it only brought goosebumps to your skin.

“How far is home?” Steve asked.

“About thirty blocks north, but you don’t have to walk with me. I just figured you didn’t want to look like a loser sitting at the bar by yourself.”

“Thanks, I appreciate your concern, but I don’t mind. I have nothing waiting for me at home, and this way, you have some company.”

“Or do you just not want me to get mugged or something?”

“Maybe that too,” he chuckled, slipping his hands into his jacket pockets. “So you live with your brother? Why don’t you have your own place?”

“I’ve been looking, and I did find one I love. The only problem is I don’t know what to say to Thor.”

“I’m sure he’ll understand.” He added. “It will probably be hard for him at first, but it’s always hard to start over,” Steve mumbled like he knew from his own experience.

“Yeah, but you haven’t experienced softie Thor.”

“Softie Thor?”

“Don’t tell anyone I told you this, but he still sleeps with his baby blanket. He calls it Mjolnir, and it has all kinds of different hammers and tools on it. He says he doesn’t have it anymore, but the last time I saw it, it was hiding under his pillow.”

“Really?” he smiled, shaking his head. “The big guy. Yay, tall--” he gestured with his hand “--blonde hair, god-like deep voice girls fall for, and he still sleeps with a blankety?” You nodded. “Yeah, I can say I have never seen that side of him.” He chuckled, shaking his head.

You rubbed your upper arms, hoping to keep the chill at bay but having little to no success. You always seemed to forget to grab a jacket before going out. “Why did you transfer to LA from Brooklyn?”

“Now, look who is full of questions?”

“Call me curious.” You shrugged, catching his eye before his return back to the ground.

“Fine, but then you have to answer one of my questions.” You nodded. “Okay, well, I transferred because I needed a new start after some bad stuff went down.”

“Why, what happened?”

“Trying to pull a fast one on me. I like it, but my turn.” You let out an annoyed sigh. “What did you do when you lived in Brooklyn?”

“Fair question." You nodded. "I was an ER nurse. It was both stressful and satisfying at the same time. On the one hand, I didn’t know what was going to come through the doors, but on the other hand, bringing someone back on the brink of dying gave me a rush. I can’t even explain the feeling; I loved my job.”

“Then, why leave?”

“I needed a fresh start.” You glanced over at him, and he nodded, biting his lip. “Looks like we left for the same reason.”

“Maybe this is fate's way of telling us we both deserve a second chance.”

“If you believe in that sort of thing,” You shivered, running your hands over your arms to get them to warm up.

“Here.” Steve started pulling off his worn-out brown leather jacket and offering it to you.

“No, you keep it. I don’t want you to get cold.”

“Don’t worry about me? I’m like a body heater.”

“Fine, but if you get cold, you better tell me.” You slipped it on, feeling the warmth envelop you. His scent on his jacket made your insides twist. You pulled it tight around you, feeling your body warm up in an instant.

“I will,” he smiled, putting his hands in his pants pockets, shrugging.

You walked in silence for a block or so when you stopped at the crosswalk, waiting for the walking figure to appear. “What was it like growing up in Brooklyn with Bucky?”

He chuckled. “Well, it’s a funny story actually because it all started in grade school.” He glanced at you as if asking if he wanted to hear it. “I was drawing on the playground one day at recess. And at the time, I was a sickly little kid, and my mom told me I couldn’t play sports because I had a lot of health problems when I was younger before I became this.” He gestured to himself, making you roll your eyes. “Anyways, I was drawing, and these bullies came over and stood in my light and poured water over my notebook…”

“Those assholes.”

“Yeah, right,” he chuckled, scratching the back of his head. The crosswalk person appeared, and they started walking again. “I was never one to back down from a fight, so I stood up to him. He pushed me, and I fell, but I got back up and tried to push him, but ended up getting pushed down again, this time landing in a mud puddle. Then, Bucky came over, and straight-up punched this dude in the face. I think we were six at the time.”

“Oh my god, are you kidding?” Your mouth dropped over, and you covered it with your hand.

“Wish I was. Bucky told him to pick on someone his own size and sent him crying. After that, we became pretty good friends.”

“Do you still have the never run from a fight mentality?” You eyed him over and noticed him keeping a close eye on you.

“Yeah, I just don’t like bullies.” He shrugged as comfortable silence fell between the two of you once again. “You said you needed a fresh start. What were you running from?” You stared hard at the ground, biting your lip, not sure if you wanted to lay it all out for him. “Question for another time. How about a counter-question,” he hummed, thinking it over as you watched him mull over what to ask next. “How was it growing up with Thor?”

“Thor and I were never close growing up, which is crazy considering I live with him now. He was my older brother, he had his friends he always hung out with, and I was the younger sister. What older sibling wants to hang out with their younger sibling unless their parents ask them to? We got along, but I grew up being close with our adopted brother Loki. When Thor graduated from high school, he tried college but found it wasn’t for him, and then one day decided to move to LA and become a firefighter. After he moved, I didn’t talk to him much. Loki and I stayed in Brooklyn, I got my nursing degree, and he went into Broadway production. We were a scattered out set of siblings, living on two different coasts.”

“If you and Thor were never close, why move here and live with him?”

“I knew he would help me find myself again.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“Thor was the brother that wasn’t afraid to make a fool of himself to get me to laugh or feel better. He could get things off my mind when I needed to, plus he’s easy to talk to. Loki’s more of the conservative brother that has a plan and can be a diva at times. I love them both, but I knew starting here would be the fresh start I needed.” You shrugged in his jacket. “I think you owe me at least three extra questions.”

“Depends what you qualify as a question.”

“Oh, is that how it’s gonna be, wise guy.” You pushed him on the arm. “My turn to ask, let’s see, hmmm.” You tapped your chin with your finger. “How did you and my brother bond so fast?”

“I don’t know. It’s what you have to do in this job, trust your team. Besides, like you said, your brother is easy to get along with after you get past his ego.”

“He does have a big ego,” you nodded with a chuckle.

“What’s the hardest part about being a 911 dispatcher?”

“Really? Already asking a question. I think you still owe me a couple, but I’ll oblige.” You took in a deep breath and let it out, thinking it over. “When the caller hangs up, and you never know what the outcome is. Like, am I making a difference, am I helping? Being a nurse, I knew the outcome because I was there for everything, but here, all you can do is send help. I could look at the records and see what happened, but what if it’s not the outcome I hoped for.” You stared at the ground in front of you. “It’s almost like never finding out an ending to a movie or a book. I want to know what happened, but maybe it’s better left not knowing. After they hang up, sometimes you don’t get time to process it because there is another caller with another emergency.”

“I get it. Sometimes what we do can be a horror movie. It can give us nightmares if you can’t save someone or can’t get there in time,” Steve’s voice drifted off. “You can play it over in your head to figure out what you could’ve done differently, but sometimes the ending you wanted to happen was never going to happen.” He stared wide-eyed at the ground before glancing your way. There was something different in his eyes, like a nightmare he never quite escaped. “And you’re right, it’s one call after another with little to no recovery time in between.”

“But, then you get those calls where everything goes right, and it makes everything you’re doing worth it.” You shot him a warm smile, earning a nod from him.

“Have to say I agree with that.”

Both of you remained silent for a couple of blocks. These careers were tough to talk about. Everyone called you heroes, but sometimes it was hard to feel like a hero.

“Why did you want to be a fireman?”

“Simple, I like helping people, but like any job, it takes a toll.” He shrugged, glancing at you. “When your adrenaline is pumping, and every nerve in your body is firing. There is pressure put on us, and we never know how things will turn out, but we have to assure those we are trying to save that they are going to be okay. It’s like in a moment's notice we have to drop everything because we are the only help that is coming, and we have to try and save them from what could be the worst moment in their life.”

“It’s almost like you rehearsed that. Did you...did you rehearse that?” You joked, forcing him to crack a smile.

“Shut up, so what if I did.” He nudged your side, making you laugh out loud. It was a real laugh, the kind you haven’t had in a long time. It wasn’t a simple chuckle or a forced giggle, but for the first time in a long time, it sounded happy. Maybe, this is what Bruce was talking about when he told you to talk to someone. Weirdly enough, you did feel lighter, like some of the weight was lifted off your shoulders with this one conversation.

You came to a stop in front of a cozy little townhouse Thor and Darryl rented. It wasn’t huge. It was a two-bedroom home that an elderly couple raised their little girl, Hope, in. You only met Hank Pym and Janet van Dyne a few times, but they were a lovely couple that decided to rent out that home and retire next to the ocean.

“This is me.” You waved your hand at the house and started pulling off Steve’s jacket when he stopped you.

“Hold on to it for me. I’m sure I’ll see you again.”

“Awful sure of yourself, what makes you think I want to see you again?”

“A guy can hope, can’t he. If it helps, my jacket looks a hell of a lot better on you.”

“It’s helping,” you breathed a smirk, pulling the jacket around you. “Goodnight, Steve. Thanks for the talk and the walk home.”

“Glad I could help. Have a nice night, YN,” he waved, watching you walk up the steps and use your keys to unlock the door. You opened the door and turned around to find him waiting for you to safely get inside.

“I want you to know, I am still holding you to answer one question,” you added, opening the door wider.

“Look forward to answering it,” he smiled as you walked in and shut the door behind you.

______

AN: Thanks for reading Part 5! This is probably a chapter you all have been waiting for...more Steve action! Haha! What did you think of the round of twenty questions?! We got a little bit more backstory on her, and a little more about Steve. He left to get a new start, too, any theories as to why?! I mean, I know, but I'm curious where your heads are at! Also, I don't know much about billiards/pool rules, it's basically what I have learned through watching people play it, so if it’s totally off my bad! Again, thanks for reading, reblogs, likes, and comments always welcome!

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theonewiththefanfics · 4 years

Text

Shy (one-shot)

Synopsys: She’s shy. He likes her. She likes him. But every time something gets between the ex-Winter Soldier and the cute lab rat that works with Stark. The team has had enough of the pining.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x f!Reader

Genre: fluffffffff

Warnings: swearing, as per usual, nothing else really. Just some cute lil fluff I wrote (also this is defo not my best work :D)

Word count: 3042

It was a seemingly ordinary day when the ex-Winter Soldier’s life changed forever.

Bucky’d plopped down onto the sofa with a disgruntled sigh, making Steve smirk and divert his attention from the show on the TV to his friend.

“You know, she likes you,” Steve said to Bucky as he sipped on his coffee giving him a side glance.

Bucky just grumbled and crossed his arms, mind still reeling on the absolute failure that he had experienced earlier that day. It'd been a trainwreck of a mission. No lives lost, but he'd made an absolute fool of himself by making a few bad calls. “Who?”

“Y/N.”

“Yeah, as if,” he snorted. “I mean I know she likes me, but she likes everyone. There’s not a single mean bone in her body.”

“No, I mean,” Steve huffed placing down the cup before he spilt some of it on himself, “she likes you. As in she might want to pursue a relationship with you.”

Bucky was choking on his spit the second the word ‘relationship’ came out of his friend’s mouth. Y/N? Liked him? As in more than a friend? He’d be lying if he said that thought didn’t send him over the Moon, but it seemed like such a far reach, especially with the interactions they’d had, that he had to give Steve a glare, especially with how she didn’t even give a single sign she might be into him.

He raised an eyebrow. “Because you’re the expert on flirting and getting it on?”

“Wow.” Steve put a hand on his chest in mock hurt. “That’s a low blow. I might’ve not had any game when I was skinny, but let me tell, you after the serum th-“

“When was the last time you went on a date?” Bucky interrupted his rant.

His friend broke the eye contact and paused, chewing on his bottom lip before deflecting. “Look that doesn’t matter.”

Bucky rolled his eyes so much he feared they’d be permanently stuck like that.

“What matters is that she likes you, but she’s too shy to do anything about it,” Steve stated.

“We had a pretty good conversation a couple of hours ago.” They did. If you take saying 'hello', an awkward wave and bashful smiles as a conversation, then yes, it was very successful.

“Shy doesn’t always mean ‘incapable of holding a conversation’. Shy can mean not talking about how they’re feeling or how their day is because they think no one cares or would get annoyed with them,” Steve said looking over his mug.

Bucky was baffled. “How – why – how could anyone think she’s annoying? She’s – she’s amazing!” But that’s when it hit him - Y/N never looked him in the eye, she always apologized for talking ‘too much’, and at any point in the conversation, she always diverted the attention away from her or her troubles.

“So…” Bucky swallowed hard. “You think I should go for it?”

Steve shrugged. “I think if you don’t, you’ll never know what it could lead to.”

***

It was about an hour later after his enlightening chat with Steve that Bucky found himself walking towards where their resident lab rat usually stayed at when he heard muffled cursing.

“Work, you absolute piece of shit!” Y/N exclaimed each word emphasized with a harsh hit against a machine’s side. “Top-notch technology my ass!”

“Everything alright, doctor Y/L/N?” His voice was gruff as he interrupted her conversation with the computer.

Not that Y/N would ever admit it, but usually just his presence alone set her body ablaze, but this time, it was a distraction and not a good one.

“Just fucking peachy,” she grunted and slammed her hand against the computer with every uttered syllable.

“Alright,” Bucky chuckled and entered the lab. “What did that poor computer do to you, since you seem so inclined to completely destroy it?”

“For starters, it decided to shut down,” she growled at the computer, and if it was alive, it would hang its head in shame. “Then, when I rebooted it, the files were not lost, oh that I could live with, but they were corrupted. Meaning I do have them, but they’re useless, and that means I have to redo everything.”

“You’d have to redo everything if the files were lost either way.” Bucky gave her a small smile, teasing the woman as she whined.

“Yeah,” Y/N threw back her head. “But it wouldn’t be as humiliating. I mean, if they’re gone, they’re gone, but they aren’t!” She threw the screen a scowl. “The files are there, just sitting… and useless… just like me.”

“Well, I wouldn’t say you’re useless." Bucky smirked at her, and she sighed.

“Please, do tell what I’m of use here right now, right this moment.”

“Company?” It came out more as a question than a statement, and that’s when Y/N realized how much she’d rattled on, how much of his precious world-saving time she’d taken up by a stupid mistake she made.

“Sorry,” she muttered, shying away from Bucky’s gaze. “Didn’t mean to bore you with my crap.”

“You don’t bore me. You could never.”

He had that love-sick look on his face as she gave him a small smile, and her eyes dropped back to the ground. Not that Y/N ever noticed, but Sam never stopped teasing him about that fucking look. The one where his eyes glimmered like stars in the night sky, and his lips involuntarily lifted up in the corners. More than once Steve had to tell him to close his mouth or someone would slip on his drool. And each time, Bucky would slap his friend on the back of his head.

“I’m not drooling,” he’d contest and go back to watching as Y/N moved around the lab, delicate fingers replacing whatever was fractured in his metal arm.

“No, saliva just generally spills out of your mouth when she’s around.”

Bucky would just grunt and say, ‘fuck off’. But he couldn’t help it really.

“Anyway." Y/N brought him out of the daydream. “Did you need anything? Is the arm acting up again?”

Although she'd never think that Bucky had any feelings for her, there was some suspicion rising in her mind. Tony was the acting engineer, but on more than one occasion he had called her up and asked if she was available to take a look at Bucky's vibranium appendage.

“Need some assistance, sweets,” the genius would mumble, and then when she would slip into work mode, he’d slyly exit the room and leave the two of them alone. And given how Tony knew, Y/N’s primary thing was chemistry and using the nanotech for cell regeneration, not engineering, it raised her suspicion level. Especially when the super-soldier came to her lab to have a check-up on days Tony was out specifically.

But she would never do anything about it. He could be standing at the altar with someone else in white walking towards him, and even then, Y/N, knowing it was her last chance, wouldn’t move a muscle to say what she felt. How could she when Bucky was the walking epitome of a Greek God while she tripped over her own feet while standing? For fuck’s sake, the man even fostered puppies in his spare time as if his day job wasn’t saving the world already how could her watching cells split in a petri dish match up to that?

“Oh, uh,” he stammered fidgeting with his fingers. “No, I uh, actually came to ask you something. Nothing work or arm… related.”

If Y/N’s heart wasn’t already beating out of her chest, she was pretty certain she’d vomit it up with the way he was looking at her. “Sure,” she whispered. “Umm, what do you want to know?”

He twisted a ring on his flesh arm. She had gotten it for him two years ago during a game of ‘Secret Santa’, which Tony promptly had added her to the list. It made her feel all fuzzy and warm on the inside for being included, but then dread settled in. What the fuck do you get a bunch of superheroes that could afford literally anything they wanted? And then she’d pulled Bucky’s name from the tacky Santa’s hat.

It wasn’t bad enough he was her crush, now she had to get him a gift he’d actually like, and she could barely hold a conversation with him that didn’t involve Avengers stuff. But from the looks of it, he had enjoyed the jewellery immensely, as any time he came over for whatever reason, he was wearing it. He liked it so much there was a lighter line of skin underneath the ring where the sun couldn’t get.

But the words wouldn’t come out of his mouth. Bucky just froze as Y/N stared at him with hopeful and inquisitive eyes. All the things he wanted to say and ask just vanished from his brain as if he’d been put back into that horrible machine that used to wipe his mind.

“Buck?” Her voice was small as his mouth hung open like an idiot. But he didn’t even get a chance to collect himself when Bruce rushed in.

“Sorry to interrupt whatever this is, but Y/N I need you. There’s a problem with the cradle.”

And that was her cue. With an apologetic smile, she pulled off her latex gloves and rushed out of the room, but not before leaning back in through the door. “Hopefully I should be done in two hours tops. Raincheck on that question?”

Bucky shook his head. “You know what, it wasn’t that important anyway.”

Y/N furrowed her eyebrows, hand reaching out to touch him, but he pushed past her and was gone, leaving the woman a bit stunned, and in all honesty - heartbroken.

***

The rest of the day she spent in utter confusion, and Bucky in self-wallowing. Y/N couldn’t understand what had changed his mind so suddenly, what she’d done so wrong, and Bucky beat himself up the whole time about choking and running away. Which is why Steve was absolutely done with it.

As Bucky sulked on the couch, stuffing his face with M&Ms and the pop tarts he’d stolen from Thor’s stash, Steve with Natasha, Clint, Tony, Bruce and Y/N in tow, all came into the room.

Seeing her lab coat swish behind her as she walked, Bucky slid down into the couch even more, as if the granite gray leather could absorb him and erase him from existence. God, how he wanted to be erased from existence.

“Hey, Y/N?” Tony drew everyone’s attention as he handed a coffee to her. “Would you mind taking a look at F.R.I.D.A.Y’s intercom system? She’s gotten a bit rusty here.”

“Umm yeah.” She nodded, kinda confused as to why she'd have to do it, but Tony was her boss, so Y/N rarely asked him much. Unless something he said was absolutely dumb. “Mind getting me a ladder?”

With a wink from Steve, Clint nodded. “Sure.”

But instead of just him leaving, all of the Avengers slowly started to ‘disperse’ throughout the living-room, before bolting towards the hallway and telling the A.I. to shut everything down.

“What’s going on?” Y/N asked looking around the common room, spotting the bright fiery hair of Natasha as she rushed out of the room, asking F.R.I.D.A.Y to override the lock code and not let either of them out. “Why are the doors locked?”

The smug smile she received from the assassin only infuriated Y/N more. “Tony!” she yelled through the glass, but the genius put hands over his ears and screamed back at her.

“Not until he talks to you!”

That’s when she felt someone towering over her from behind.

Two beautiful Y/E/C eyes looked up at him as Y/N turned around, confusion swimming in her irises. Bucky almost swore he passed out just from that look alone.

“Buck, what’s going on?"

The second he’d seen the group walk in, he knew what was happening. He wanted to murder all of them. Rip them apart piece by piece, but not in front of Y/N. No. He’d do that in the middle of the night, blending into the shadows and delivering slow and painful deaths to all of the conspirators.

But at the same time, this was his chance. There was literally nowhere for either of them to run unless you counted jumping out through the window and the ninety-story drop, you’d face. Which seemed very appealing to him at that moment, but Steve’s words rang through his head – ‘You’ll never know what it could lead to.” And he hoped it would lead to something beautiful, so taking a deep breath, Bucky confessed.

“Because I’m a coward…” he sighed, “and I can’t do it without someone telling me to.”

“Why?”

“I’m scared,” it came out as a whisper, and Y/N had to take a step back hurt flashing across her face thinking back to all of the times they’d spent together, while in truth Bucky’d been terrified of her.

“Of me?”

Instantly he shook his head seeing the pain on her features, and once more Bucky scolded himself. “No… of what your reaction might be.”

“Buck, you know I would never judge you. You can always talk to me… about anything.”

“Yes, but this will change things.”

“How?”

“I don’t know… that’s what I’m scared of. I don’t want to lose you.”

“Never. You could tell me you’re hiding a body in the tub, and I would offer you my help to get rid of it.”

And it was this firm statement that solidified his decision.

“Would you maybe,” Bucky exhaled deeply not daring to turn and look at the team that was gawking at both of them like hawks pressed against the glass, the same team that had bolted shut every door and window to prevent either of theirs escapes, “would you maybe want to go out… with… me… on a date?”

Y/N was stunned. The cup of coffee she was still holding in her hand went slack, and it would’ve smashed against the ground had Bucky not quickly stepped forward and caught it stepping to stand in front of her.

“You don’t have to,” he mumbled, looking at the milk infused drink. It was a light beige colour with a white foamy swirl in the middle like a little vortex that was sucking him in. God did he hope it would pull him in and never let out after what he was going to say. “It’s just that… I really like you.” There. Now it was out there. “I really like you. And not the way a friend likes a friend. I like you in a way that I want to hold your hand when we walk out together. I want to buy you coffee in the mornings and wake you up with breakfast in the bed and smooth out the hair that’s fallen on your face…”

She wasn’t breathing as with every single word said Bucky seemed to move closer. “I think I might be in love with you, Y/N…” his hand gently lifted and cupped her cheek.

She just stared at him, mouth slightly agape, shallow breaths escaping into the air as her heart beat out of her chest in a manner, she thought it might hit Bucky directly in the stomach.

“Say something,” he pleaded, blue eyes searching for an answer in Y/N’s Y/E/C ones. “Please.”

“I – I don’t know what to say,” she whispered back. And it wasn’t because she didn’t feel the same, not at all. In fact, when he had started his whole confession, she felt like she was about to pass out from all the love that invaded her body, but the thing is - Y/N has never been good with emotions. She never knew how to process them, how to give the correct answer and make people happy. She was shy, awkward and a recluse. And now she was supposed to come out of her safety shell. Which is why for the first time in her life, she expressed herself with her actions by leaning up, grasping onto the nape up Bucky’s neck and pulling their mouths together.

When her lips touched his, Bucky knew there was no going back. Not that he’d ever want to. He couldn’t help the giant smile that bloomed on his face, as he pulled Y/N closer to him, wrapping his arm one around her waist, the other trailing up to settle between her shoulder blades, pushing their chests together, so impossibly close an ant couldn’t crawl between the two.

It became even more of a beautiful moment when Y/N’s own lips pulled up in a smile, breaking the kiss apart, but leaving them grinning and feeling dizzy from the happiness.

“Guess we needed a gentle nudge in the right direction,” Bucky gave out a small laugh, both palms securely resting on Y/N’s hips and bringing her closer.

“I’d say it was more of a shove with a rifle at our backs,” she said, holding onto Bucky’s shoulders fingers skimming against his clavicles and making his breath stop halfway to his throat. “Let’s… let’s go somewhere… the two of us without a bunch of people watching our every move.” Her eyes flitted over to where the rest of the team stood behind the doors listening in on the two, and suddenly the heads of their teammates disappeared from the view, making Y/N and Bucky shake their heads.

“Yeah,” he chuckled, squeezing her side. “That’s probably the best idea. You truly are a dream, aren’t ‘ya?”

Y/N could only chuckle and hide her face in the crook of Bucky’s neck as her hold tightened around his middle, and he responded much the same by weaving his fingers in the hairs on the back of her neck and pulling her closer if that was even possible, burying his nose in the Y/H/C locks.

“Don’t go all shy on me now.”

“Can’t,” she mumbled back. “You make me turn into mush.”

Bucky chuckled, pressing a kiss to Y/N’s forehead. “A cute mush.”

“Shut up!”

And he did by pulling her in for another searing kiss. God, how he loved his shy girl.

Tags (crossed out wouldn't take):

Bucky tag list: @thunderous-flower @who-cares-rn @projectxhappiness @callmebucky-doll @coal000 @killuaenthusiast @courtneychicken @sophiealiice @raquelbc2003 @watch-out-for-thorns @potentially-kinetic @thatonegirljessy99 @proxinge @bbkenna @buckysclub @ulired @fangirlofeverythingbasically @mrsalh32611 @horrorx570ximagines @the-nargles-made-me-do-it @pooslie @itsisabelanotisabella @httpmcrvel @purplebananatragedy @pxrrishly @parker-barnes-af @skulliebythesea @california-grown @stevehesaidabadlanguageword @belongsto-prachi @hello-i-am-insane

Marvel tags: @nerissa98 @happyseagrill @asguardiansoftheavengers @crazybutconfidentaf @wishingforahome @pizzarollpatrol @desir-ae

Forever tags: @lumelgy @palaiasaurus64 @supernaturalbaesduh @breezy1415 @crazy--me @thatawkwardlittlefangirl @sea040561 @staryeyedgirl @deathbyarabbit @s-c-a-r-e-d-po-t-t-e-r @reblogger-not-a-blogger @m-a-t-91 @dalilx @i-need-a-hero-i-need-a-loki @maladaptive-ninja-returns @averyrogers83 @in-the-end-im-still-trash @gallifreyansass @dewy-biitch @avxgers @unlikelygalaxygiver @sweet-ladyy @magicwithaknife @ollyoxenfrees @bnhvrdy @tvwhoresblog @celebsimagines @thatkindofgurl @sj-thefan @teenwolflover28 @strangersstranger

A/N: have you ever hated your job so much so, that you can’t sleep, can’t eat and basically live in a well of anxiety? and not because of the work itself, but because of that ONE PERSON that makes it miserable? Cause I do. And I can’t wait to get away from it.

P.S. sorry for being so pessimistic, but it’s just a nightmare.

P.S.S. feedback is always appreciated :) P.S.S.S. if you wanna be added to a taglist, drop me a message :)

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myketheartista · 4 years

Text

The Masquerade: How They Came To Be

This is a small headcanon type of thing that I thought of the morning after the stream, so I’m obviously obsessed with these two so much to the point where I made lore for how Sir Billiam and his butler met. To make things easier on myself, I just called the butler Ranboo since I didn’t want to mess too much with canon by giving him a new name.

***Warnings: Light violence, mentions of killing/death, manipulation (from the egg, but just thought I’d include it just in case)***

**Please remember that this is not canon. I took some liberties and assumed a few things based on prior knowledge. Oh, and don’t take things out of context. This is NOT shipping, and I’m putting this here because I know some people will question the way I write them interacting. I don’t condone any shipping with Ranboo or Techno, and that goes for any and all characters they play.

Please enjoy! And leave your thoughts if you’d like :)

Billiam finds the egg. Builds the mansion around it to keep it safe and hidden because it seems like something bizarre enough that could earn him a good sum of money. Sell pieces of it, get rich, live a long, good life swimming in wealth.

He wants to see what it does too, but the more time he spends with it, the more corrupts his mind becomes. Soft whispers that scratch at the walls of his head, telling him to give-- give himself, give others, just give to the egg. And in the beginning stages, it isn’t so bad. He just sees the egg as something valuable. Value slowly transitions into a sort of obsession. He must protect it, feed it, take care of it so no one else will hurt it. If he helps the egg, it’ll help him.

So when he finds a young boy wandering through the endless sea of trees surrounding his estate, he grows a bit defensive. It’s just some random kid, an inch or two shorter than Billiam with messy chocolate brown hair and a dazed look in his eyes (Oh, and he’s definitely lower than a commoner, just look at the mess he is!). Tattered clothes, no shoes, patches of dirt dusting his face and hands; he’s an awful sight. But a peculiar one at best with the notable pointed ears and extra set of canines fitted snug next to the original pair. Whatever he is, Billiam knows that he isn’t a threat, and he can recognize that much through the fog clouding his brain telling him to get rid of this unwelcomed stranger. More than anything, he pities him, and a frown crosses his lips when he tries to get some answers out of the kid, but he’s met with a confused tilt of the head and awkward silence. Well, by observing his overall condition, Billiam concludes that he has no where to go.

So...he takes him in. Not because he cares! He really shouldn’t and doesn’t care for someone of such low status, but seeing Ranboo scarf down a whole plate of whatever Billiam could find along with some cake and a few glasses of water makes him feel a bit uneasy...about- about how much food he can eat, yes, of course. If he’s going to be staying here, he can’t go around eating everything they have. He’ll have to set some ground rules for this new guest. Such as throwing out those old clothes and giving him one of his own dress shirts and a well-made vest he never ended up wearing. Ranboo asks him for help with his tie much too often, and that’s something that should aggravate him, (inability to do anything on his own, how annoying) but he finds himself walking Ranboo through the process each time he’s called for. All the while, as he helps this kid learn the ropes and shows him around, those harsh whispers demand he stop. Get rid of him. He stares at Ranboo, the boy who can’t even speak the language of this planet, can’t remember where he came from, hates eye contact and taking showers, doesn’t even know what he is, and he wonders how the egg could even tell him to kill someone as innocent as him.

Billiam decides he’ll be his butler. Ranboo doesn’t protest since he doesn’t even know what a butler is, but he agrees without complaint. Some conversation over dinner that turned into a fake contract that neither of them signed, but Billiam made the deal that Ranboo can stay if he does his part which was simply obeying him when he asked for the butler. This...quickly got out of hand. Whenever there’s a party and a handful of guests crowd through the front doors, Billiam makes it known that he has a butler, and a very bad one at that. Calls him in that sing-song voice and requests he fetch their new arrivals some wine only to degrade him and claim he’s going a week without food afterwards. Ranboo really doesn’t mind, partially because he can’t even refuse or talk back due to the limitations of his knowledge of the unfamiliar language of this place, but he’s also become a bit dedicated to serving Billiam. The man practically saved his life and gave him everything he could want. When he is allowed to speak, he’s always asking how many words since that’ll guide him towards forming a more accurate sentence with letters and syllables he’s not used to. More often than not, he sticks to humming his responses to make it easier on himself. Even then, there’s not much to worry about. He’s bad with social interaction and the guests rarely pay attention to him, so he often hides in the corner as they all participate in their games and conversations regarding the economy. The more he excludes himself, the more he misses the frequent disappearances of the guests. He never questions Billiam where they went, why they left so early into the evening, why the mansion has terrible lighting problems, (they should get that fixed, it’s quite troublesome) he just enjoys the eventual peace and quiet that fills their home once everyone is gone.

The parties increase throughout the months that Ranboo resides there. It’s exhausting being a butler when all he’s required to do is follow people’s orders-- how does Billiam do it? He’s the one who hosts them, greets everyone, plans the festivities and everything. He should ask him about that sometime. Instead of pestering him, he finds himself watching from the stairs as Billiam catches up with yet another group of friends. Hm...why doesn’t he just invite the same people over? Being rich must make you a lot of friends. But these people seem snobby and annoying. Ranboo doesn’t like them very much. He prefers to stay the way he is, and if that means he remains a “commoner”, then so be it. Billiam, on the other hand, doesn’t mind stepping into a new character every time he hosts one of these masquerades. The weird airy sound to his voice makes him appear friendlier, more trustworthy, but it always makes Ranboo put a fist to his mouth to stifle his laughter. It’s utterly ridiculous and almost childish, but it’s entertaining nonetheless.

He enjoys the soft conversations they share in their far too big of a home when things are back to normal (And when did he start calling it their home?). They usually pass the time by Ranboo asking questions and Billiam responding to the best of his ability which makes him seem smarter than he probably is. But for someone who can’t seem to remember where they came from or how to communicate, Ranboo is grateful for anything Billiam can give him.

So one night, when he thinks they’ve grown close enough to where Ranboo can consider them friends, he wanders the mansion to find Billiam-- wants to ask him something, but he’s nowhere to be found. It’s been months since he’s lived here, and he thinks he knows every nook and cranny of the mansion but…the longer he stares at that duplicate of a spider painting Billiam apparently commissioned someone to make despite the same painting hanging just a few feet over, he starts to feel an itch in the back of his mind. And when he finds the courage to move it aside, finds a secret entrance to a room he’s never seen before, he’s honestly baffled. The atmosphere of the room makes him feel off, and that itch starts to grow, manifests into a voice trying to peel through his thoughts and gain control. It makes him feel...uncomfortable…wrong. And when he sees Billiam standing at the end of the room, back facing him while he stares at a large red mass with vines trailing off of it, up the walls and across the floor tangling around Billiam’s feet, that discomfort shifts to something a little colder. He wanders into the room with light feet and a dry mouth, struggling to get his voice to work.

“Sir?”

The word doesn’t feel as foreign as other words do since it’s the one thing he’s gotten the hang of saying. He sees the visible tension build in Billiam’s shoulders and watches him turn around slowly to look at him, a chill trickling down his spine when he spots the sword in his hand. He gets no response, just a rather lifeless stare from Billiam. He speaks up again.

“Sir, what are you doing?”

It’s as if he was stuck in some sort of trance cause in an instant, a soft smile breaks out onto Billiam’s face and he gestures at Ranboo.

“What wonderful timing! Come closer, I’d like to show you something.”

Ranboo feels strange, but he pushes down the crippling sensation of dread pooling in his stomach and walks up to settle next to Billiam. He feels the light touch of a hand on his back, tensing up as he stares at the oddly shaped...something before them.

“What is this?”

Billiam looks so giddy when he hears the question.

“It’s the egg.”

And Ranboo breaks away from the “egg” to stare at Billiam.

“Pardon?”

Billiam looks at him, and it’s now that Ranboo notices the glint in his eye, the way his once brown irises swirl with red, and the look he gives him reminds him of the expression he wore when they first met.

Pity.

“My dear butler, it’s the egg! It’s a truly magnificent thing, is it not?”

And Ranboo can only stare awkwardly between the egg and the man who he’s lived with all of his life because what the hell is he going on about?

“I, uh,... I don’t seem to understand.”

Billiam’s expression softens, still holding that little ounce of pity that Ranboo has begun to dislike.

“You’ll understand soon enough. Come.”

And the hand on his back gently pushes him forward, guiding him as they walk, and Ranboo feels his heels involuntarily drag against the stone floor, putting up some resistance. That pool of dread begins to manifest into something else. An icy, prickling puddle of fear. Billiam is putting himself behind him as Ranboo draws closer to the egg, and the whispering only grows louder, clawing at his brain and sending a jolt of pain to his skull as it screams at him. It’s becoming too much, it hurts, but Billiam’s hand seems to latch onto the back of his vest, twisting and pushing him downwards just inches from the egg to where he’s on his knees and his hands are planted on the cold concrete below him. He realizes, as goosebumps trail up his arms and his eyes begin to sting, that he’s never quite felt fear before up until now. He doesn’t like it too much. All he can do is stare at the red in front of him, watch as the little vines underneath his hands sprout up from the cracks of the floor and curl around his fingers. The grip on his vest tightens, and he’s painfully reminded who’s doing this to him.

“Do you hear it?”

He just nods, exhaling shakily and struggling to take in any air as the panic settles inside of his chest.

“It’s loud.” He voice wavers as it comes out weak and afraid, and he hears Billiam hum, pleased with the answer.

“What’s it saying?”

And he can’t respond because he doesn’t know, it’s speaking a language he’s never heard, he can’t translate it. He feels the urge to hurt, to kill, to follow, to obey, feels fingers digging into his brain and pulling him forward as if he understands what it’s saying after all, but it all seems like gibberish to him. He feels nothing but everything at once. The grip on his vest tugs lightly, and he swallows thickly.

“I...I don’t know.”

He can practically feel the disappointment radiating off of Billiam when he gives the answer, and he suddenly regrets saying anything at all. He hears Billiam shift and the grip loosens by just a hair.

“Is he not worthy?” Billiam mutters to himself, but…it sounds like it’s directed to someone. Some thing. Ranboo doesn’t know, but it’s said so quietly and sounds…sad. After a few seconds of silence and Ranboo watching those tiny red vines curiously curl even more around his fingers and onto his hand in an attempt to travel up his wrist, he feels the hand leave his back. A sigh escapes him, and he goes to push himself off of the ground to sit on his knees, but a sharp pain quickly replaces the hand, breaking through the layers of fabric and grazing the skin of his back. A strangled noise crawls out of his throat and he ducks his head, trying to arch his back away from the tip of the sword angled towards him.

“Sir?” He sounds so pathetic, so desperate, he doesn’t want to jump to conclusions but he feels like he’s about to be killed by the man who took him in and that’s certainly not settling well in his stomach. Billiam remains silent and that’s what scares him because silence doesn’t seem like a good thing, especially in a situation such as this. The silence lasts for what seems like minutes, but he hears a frustrated huff come from behind him and the sword disappears from his back right when he thinks it’ll slip through him.

“Stand up.”

Ranboo is quick to obey, ignoring the trembling in his legs and wringing his hands together to calm the light shaking that’s taken over them. He hesitantly turns to look at Billiam who’s staring back at him with those red eyes that seem a bit duller this time around. He wants to back away when Billiam moves towards him, but his feet refuse to move and a hand comes down on his shoulder, gentle and somewhat comforting despite the situation.

“You don’t feel anything?”

It seems like he’s desperate now, looking for an answer that will settle the uncertainty bubbling in the pit of his stomach. Brows furrowed, lips pressed into a thin line, and red eyes beginning to lose their glow. Somewhat back to normal. Ranboo pauses for a long moment, hesitant, terrified, legs shaking and throat closing up at the thought of what Billiam will do if he receives an answer he isn’t particularly fond of.

“...No.”

It takes his entire body to force the word out because even though he was on his knees moments ago, pleading that he’d wake up, that this was just a very intense dream where everything felt too real for his liking, somewhere deep down he believes Billiam won’t be mad and kill him right where he stands. That expression only reassures him because it’s coming from the only person he knows to trust.

Billiam sighs again and looks down, a bit defeated, maybe even confused because what is he to do now? He can’t even go through with sacrificing this kid he’s grown a damn attachment to and that’s a problem. If he isn’t the one to admit it, the egg is there to remind him. His hand slides down Ranboo’s arm, hanging limply by his side as his voice grows quiet.

“Do you trust me?”

And Ranboo doesn’t have anything else to say but the immediate “Yes.” that follows. Billiam looks up at him, a bit surprised but gaze a tad softer than it was before.

“What was your name again?”

Ranboo’s hands wring together some more, and he mindlessly picks at the vines that have embedded themselves into his skin. He goes to speak, but his tongue falls differently against the roof of his mouth and clicks against his teeth in a way that Billiam won’t understand. And even though that ends up being true, Billiam still smiles at him and a trickle of warmth spreads throughout Ranboo’s chest.

“Just do as I say, and you’ll be fine.”

Ranboo can’t find it in him to defy what Billiam says.

So when he gives him the sword and tells him to kill the guests that enter their home, he does so without question. He follows his commands as gentle as they are, and he listens to the garbled whispering brushing the edges of his mind. And if his eyes appear a bit redder when he goes to look in the mirror, he doesn’t bring it up to Billiam. He still picks at those little red vines that have melded into his skin as he watches the larger vines of the egg curl around the bodies he’s dragged to this secret room, hidden away from any curious eyes. And throughout the ruthless killings and Ranboo’s slow descent into madness, Billiam continues to treat him the same way, apologizing later on for the small scar on his back. He simply shrugs the apology off and gives him a smile, dragging…what was his name again? James? The name rings a bell, but he disregards the vague feeling of guilt crawling its way into his chest and continues to drag him away by the legs.

Even when he goes back to get Karl and sees the edges of his body disintegrating into little white speckles of what looks like dust, he doesn’t question it or show Billiam. Delivers his body to the egg regardless of whatever strange deterioration Karl’s body was undergoing. Another party, another meal for the egg. As long as Billiam is happy, so is his loyal butler.

#headcanon machine goes brr #dsmp drabbles #dream smp #tales from the smp #sir billiam #ranbutler #technoblade #ranboo #mcyt #dsmp #dream smp fanfic #fanfic #long post #dream smp fic #tftsmp #AND THERE WE GO #took me a few days to edit it and make it pretty but #i just thought of this the morning after the stream and i just #LOST my mind #i just enjoy soft billiam taking this kid in and making him a butler #them being goofy and having almost a mentor and apprentice typa thing goin on #and i do think ranboo isnt as effected by the egg at first because i like the whole desire thing #ranboo doesnt have any immediate desires since he never knew WHAT to desire but #after ranboo discovers billiam with the egg i think his desire becomes to serve billiam to the best of his ability #so he begins that slow descent into madness as i said above #but yeah! i like the headcanon that ranboo is still part enderman in this period of time but #more human than anything #still six feet like irl ranboo bc billiam is pretty tall for bein piglin and all but #the only traits he really has are extra pointy teeth and pointed ears #his height is barely effected

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izzyfandoms · 4 years

Note

Everyone/deceit where the others are trying to get Janus to blush by flirting As a challenge? Ficlet?

(This ended up a full oneshot length lol, so this is no longer a ficlet, hope you enjoy!)

Flustered Snake

SHIPS: Dukeceit, Loceit, Moceit, Roceit, Anxceit, Thomceit (Everyone x Janus)

WARNINGS: Remus makes some sexual comments/implications

GENERAL TAGLIST: @quillfics42 @aj-draws @phantomofthesanderssides @phlying-squirrel @sly-is-my-name-loving-is-my-game @because-were-fam-ily @imtryingthisout @a-creepycookie @emo-disaster @littlestr @spooky-scary-virgil @fuyel @mimsidoodles @soupgremlin @aroaceagenderfluid @birdsbookshiddeninrealbirdsskin @quirkalurk @gingers-trashy-stuff @iinyxtello @justaqueercactus @melodiread @mrbubbajones @glassferns @pun-master-logan @gayturtlez

Masterpost

The moment that Janus stepped into the living area of the mindscape, a pair of hands behind him landed on his hips. He froze in place, immediately feeling the heat of a blush crawl up his neck, across his face and to the tips of his ears. He was sure that his skin was now an obvious, bright red.

The voice that belonged to the pair of hands cackled at that, and a chin came to rest on Janus's head, revealing it to be Remus behind him.

(Unfortunately, the twins were much taller than Janus, and they both loved to take advantage of it: especially when it flustered the deceitful side, as it often did. He both despised and adored that fact, not that he'd ever admit to the latter out loud.)

That made Janus relax slightly - he recognised the voice, so it wasn't somehow a stranger with their hands on his hips - though his creeping blush only worsened.

"You seem flustered, snake," he said, and Janus could practically hear the grin in his voice. "What's up?"

"Shut up," Janus hissed, crossing his arms.

He didn't move out of Remus's grip, though, and instead leant back against the other side's chest. Remus then gently squeezed his hips, and Janus almost regretted staying in place.

"Comfy?"

"We are standing in the living room."

Remus chuckled - the sound low and just beside Janus's ear, rumbling through his whole body.

"We could always move to somewhere comfier," Remus grinned. "Like my bed."

Janus huffed and rolled his eyes. "In your dreams."

"All my dreams. Day and night. Wanna recreate them?"

"Never."

"You know, I'm talking 'bout fu-"

"I know what you're talking about," Janus hissed, feeling his face somehow redden even further. "And no."

Janus could practically hear Remus's pout.

"Aw, but-"

"No! Shut up!"

"Make me?" Remus offered.

Janus groaned, and buried his face in his hands.

***

It had taken quite a few minutes, but Janus had finally managed to distract Remus with food - disgusting and rotten, inedible food - and gotten away.

(If he'd really wanted Remus to stop flirting with him, and had just made the simple request, Remus would have done so with little hesitation. But Janus's obvious blush and moments of almost returned flirtations had only spurred the other side on.)

(Janus could flirt. In the past he had smoothly and calmly flirted with the other sides on numerous occasions, but the moment they flirted back, he was done for. They had only now begun to take advantage of this, and Janus couldn't for the life of him figure out why.)

He was halfway across the mindscape's long hallway - halfway to his bedroom, where he could wallow in his flustered state in peace - when he was stopped in his tracks by Logan's voice behind him.

"Janus, are you busy?"

Janus suppressed a sigh.

"Obviously," he clearly lied, starting to turn around. "What do you nee-"

The last word was cut off by a strangled noise (accompanied with widening eyes and a sharp intake of breath) as his eyes landed on the very shirtless Logan standing in front of him. He was... more in shape that Janus had expected, but perhaps that shouldn't have been a surprise given his obsession with being as healthy as possible.

Janus tried very hard not to check him out, but was unable to keep his eyes from drifting down, and then back up, and then back down again. He sucked in a breath as he felt his ears warm.

Logan straightened up, his expression turning quite pleased. Before Janus could question him further, he pulled a notebook and pen out of thin air - summoning them effortlessly - and began to scribble on one of the pages, about halfway through.

Janus watched him, thoroughly confused and still - somewhat reluctantly - checking Logan out. Then, when Logan closed the notebook and it disappeared again, the logical side smiled at him: genuine and warm, such an uncommon sight.

It made Janus's face warm and his heart tremble, which was far more telling than the reaction to shirtless Logan.

"Thank you, Janus," Logan said. "That was all I needed."

Then, he sank out, and Janus was left alone, confused, and still - unfortunately - quite flustered.

***

After that, he spent a significant amount of time in his room, wallowing in his hopeless, hopeless pining.

(Remus was only joking. The interaction with Logan was only part of some experiment. Surely those were the real explanations for the two frankly baffling experiences from today, right?)

When he finally decided to leave the room, it was only because he was hungry. Remus's onslaught of sexual flirting had distracted him from breakfast, so he was rather eager to get something to eat.

Luckily, when he arrived in the kitchen, Remus wasn't there.

But Patton was, and the delighted smile on his face when Janus entered the room was just as disastrous to his heartrate as Remus had been.

"Jan!" He beamed, dropping the spoon and bowl he'd been washing up and walking over, taking both of Janus's hands in his own. "I'm so glad you're here!"

It was then that Janus realised he'd forgotten his gloves.

The warmth of Patton's hands against his skin and scales was enough to make him feel equally warm and fuzzy inside. He was suddenly hit with the desire to make that warmth spread to every part of his body, and in that moment, he really, really wanted to kiss Patton.

"What- what do you need, Patton?" He asked slowly.

Patton squeezed his hands. "I just made cookies! And I need someone to test them for me. Would you mind?"

"Oh, uh... alright."

Patton beamed.

Then, he dropped Janus's hands, and the deceitful side would never admit to the disappointment that rose in his chest at the loss of warmth. He watched as Patton plucked a cookie from the plate - carefully selecting what he deemed the best one, before turning back around and bringing it back to Janus.

Janus reached out, ready to take the cookie from his hand, but Patton shook his head, holding up the cookie to Janus's lips.

Janus blinked, dropping his hand and then slowly opening his mouth obediently, taking a small bite of the cookie. It was good, as always - warm and chewy and his absolute favourite flavour.

Patton giggled. "You like them?" At Janus's silent nod, he continued. "Oh, wonderful! I'm so glad!"

Janus swallowed, and opened his mouth to respond, but the words died in his throat when Patton leant forward and brushed his thumb over Janus's lip. His brain short-circuited for a few seconds as his face went hot, but then he realised that Patton had probably just been brushing a crumb from his mouth, and that it wasn't something he should've been worried about.

Patton's smile turned slightly mischievous, and he giggled again.

"Everything alright, Janus?"

***

Janus had returned to his room shortly after that little encounter. He'd mumbled excuses that Patton had seemed to believe - though the disappointment on his face when Janus left had been unmistakable.

He fell back onto his bed, dropping his head onto his pillow and burying his face into his hands.

What was going on today? Remus and Logan and Patton were all acting strange, and Janus couldn't get them out of his head.

Or maybe Janus was the strange one.

He was the one with the huge, perception-altering crushes on all of his friends - Thomas included.

Janus huffed, dropping his arms to his sides and staring up at the ceiling. There were little plastic stars - made by Roman many years ago - stuck all over it, that glowed in the dark when it was night.

Janus hadn't been afraid of the dark since they were all small, but he still kept the stars there out of habit.

(And out of love for Roman, though that part he would never admit aloud.)

There was a loud knock on the door, and Janus jumped, sitting up suddenly and staring at it, wide-eyed. He froze for a moment, before he grabbed his gloves off his bedside table and quickly pulled them back on. He put his hat on, too.

He got up, and walked over to the door.

When he opened it, he immediately came face-to-face with Roman, whose whole face lit up when his eyes landed on Janus.

(And, oh, that really did something to Janus, didn't it? He felt all warm and fuzzy inside - the way Roman was looking at him making him feel like he was floating.)

He felt his face warm, and the greeting he'd meant to say died in his throat as the blush formed.

Roman laughed suddenly: loud and cheerful and delighted, and it made Janus jump. His heart skipped a beat in his chest and he felt simultaneously confused and happy, as Roman's laugh was contageous.

"Well, that was easy!" Roman beamed.

"I- uh- what?"

But before Janus could question Roman properly, Roman reached forward and grabbed Janus's face in both hands. He then pressed a kiss to the centre of Janus's forward.

Janus let out a strangled noise as Roman let go of him and took a step back.

"Thank you, Jan," he said earnestly.

Then, he sunk out, leaving Janus incredibly confused, and even more flustered, ready to melt into a puddle on the floor.

***

It took a few hours for Janus to gain the courage to leave his room again after that.

But, when he did, he found the living room of the mindscape suddenly quite cold. He stood in the centre of the room, rubbing his arms and shivering, as the yellow button-up shirt he had on was far too thin, and he regretted choosing that over his usual outfit that morning.

"Okay," he huffed. "Whose idea was this?"

"I know, right?" Suddenly came a voice from behind him. "It's freezing."

Janus glanced back over his shoulder, his eyes landing on Virgil, who was stood a few feet behind him.

"You cold?" Virgil continued.

"No," Janus lied flatly.

Virgil snorted. "Right."

Then, he did something that Janus couldn't have predicted. He took off his hoodie.

This was peculiar for two reasons - one, that the mindscape was cold, and two, that Virgil almost never took off his hoodie, and never without a good reason.

Janus blinked at him, so surprised that he stopped rubbing his goosebump-covered arms. Then, his eyes widened further as Virgil held the hoodie out to him.

"What are you doing?"

Virgil rolled his eyes, though fondly and with a half-smirk.

"Giving you my jacket," he answered.

"But- what? Why?"

"I heard snakes are cold-blooded."

Janus huffed, attempting to glare at Virgil but failing miserably. Virgil seemed amused at his attempts, which made it even harder to glare at him, because Janus wanted to kiss that smirk right off his face.

"I don't need your jacket," Janus lied.

(He would very much appreciate Virgil's jacket, for many reasons, but he obviously could never admit that aloud.)

Virgil snorted. But, instead of responding to that, he walked up to Janus and draped his hoodie over the other sides' shoulders. Janus froze, especially as Virgil's touch lingered longer than it could have, and Janus could suddenly feel himself warm.

His cheeks went hot, likely turning red.

Virgil caught Janus's eye, and the slight smirk returned for just a moment.

"Hope you warm up," he said, before turning and walking out of the room, his hands in the pockets of his jeans, leaving Janus warm, alone and very confused.

***

Janus's confusion had only grown when Thomas suddenly summoned him for no good reason.

Usually, he summoned his sides for videos, and the rest of the time they showed up on their own. He liked to spend time with them, sure, but usually either with all of them, or when the sides showed up first.

Janus appeared in the sitting room.

"Thomas," he said. "What do you need?"

Thomas was sat on the couch, leaning back against the cushions, and his face lit up when he saw Janus, which made Janus feel all kinds of things, and made him almost wish he was the side in charge of Thomas's feelings, so he could know exactly what he was feeling.

(The sides may have all been able to see through Thomas's eyes and hear through ears, but none of them had access to everything that went on inside his head. They each had their own different parts. Virgil knew his anxieties, Patton knew his feelings, Janus knew his lies and the secrets and desires he hid from even himself. None knew everything, even when they might want to.)

"Oh, Janus!" Thomas smiled. "You're here!" He patted the couch beside him, indicating that Janus should sit. "Come on, hang out with me."

Janus blinked, sitting down immediately but with a confused expression.

"Do you... need something?"

"Do I need to? Can't I just summon you to hang out?"

"I mean, no, but-" Janus cut himself off with a strangled noise when Thomas reached forward and plucked his hat right off his head.

Then, Thomas placed the hat on his own head with a grin.

"How do I look?"

Janus opened and closed his mouth a few times, stumbling over his words. It took him a moment to pull together a coherent thought that wasn't just the word 'cute' repeated twelve times.

"Uh, um... you look... good?"

Thomas laughed. "Oh, Jan, you flatter me," he joked. Then, he looked Janus over slowly - making him feel all kinds of things - before his gaze settled on Janus's hair. He reached across, running his fingers through it and sticking his tongue out in concentration. "Your hat must mess your hair up a lot, you wear it so much."

"It's- uh, it's messy, usually," Janus choked out. "That's why I wear the hat."

Thomas pulled his hand back, placing it in his lap, and Janus only just managed to keep himself from making a disappointed noise.

"Aww, I don't know, I like it," Thomas said, seemingly oblivious to Janus's plight. "It's a lot curlier than mine, kinda like Patton's but much darker: almost black." Thomas smiled. "I think it's cute."

Janus blinked at him, feeling his face turn hot and red for what felt like the millionth time that day. He buried his face in his hands and groaned.

“Why are you guys like this?” He mumbled into his palms.

“Huh?” Thomas half-laughed, sounding partly amused and partly confused.

“You’re just- aah!” Janus almost screamed with frustration. “Making me feel... so much!”

“So much what?”

Janus paused at that. He... recognised that tone. It was a tone of faux-innocence, one he’d heard - and, in the past, actively prompted - from Thomas multiple times.

He knew something.

Janus pulled his hands away from his face, shooting Thomas an accusatory look that made him hold up his hands in defence.

“You know something,” Janus accused, with a still-red face, but significantly more confidence than before. “What is it?”

“Uh...” Thomas trailed off, hesitating, but at Janus’s expression, he finally gave in and smiled sheepishly at him. “I may know of a... competition, of sorts.”

“Competition?”

“Between the other sides. And, uh... me, too, I guess. We wanted to see who could make you blush the most.” For a moment, Thomas paused. “‘Cos you’re cute.”

Janus’s brain broke.

He stared blankly at Thomas for a few seconds, before understanding finally hit him like a train, and the blush that had just faded returned again, full-force. He felt hot and flustered and still a little confused, but mostly just startled.

“Oh,” he squeaked.

Thomas let out an awkward laugh, rubbing the back of his head with his hand and glancing away.

“Sorry, if that’s kinda weird,” he apologised quickly. “We didn’t want to make you uncomfortable, we just really li- you know what, it doesn’t matter. I’m sorry.”

Janus buried his face in his hands with another loud groan. He mumbled something that Thomas couldn’t quite make out. Thomas leant forward, trying to listen better.

“Sorry, what was that?” Thomas asked.

Janus repeated himself, slightly louder.

“It worked,” he grumbled.

Thomas laughed, short and slightly startled. “Yeah, we, uh... we figured. You’re kinda obvious when you’re flustered. And cute.”

Janus groaned into his palms again, even louder this time.

“I mean,” Thomas continued. “You know they can all see you right now, too, right?”

There was a beat.

“Oh, god.”

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etherealluminescence · 4 years

Note

Hi there! I was hoping you could do a headcanon of the demon brothers with an Mc/reader that self harms pls? You don’t have to though!

I have 7/8 fic requests so I’ll do the headcanons first!! ((: and I don’t mind! This is going to be a little bit angsty! And I hope you’re doing okay!! I’ve never personally cut / done great self-harm so I based it off stories I’ve heard, or common knowledge. Sorry if it doesn’t sound completely okay!

I tried a bunch of ways to describe an MC who does self harm?? Does that make sense? Like for depression, for the thrill, for boredom? I’ve had friends and know many people who have self-harmed, and done it for myriads of reasons, and I sort of wanted to include all types?? I hope that doesn’t sound rude or mean-

One more HC and then it’s fic time. I’m excited to write Solomon smut.

Brothers react to GN!MC doing self-harm

Lucifer

He didn’t pay much attention to you at first, considering how busy he was. He thought of you as a bit of a nuisance, and began to pick-up on what was really going on after talking to you for a bit.

You used a lot of self-deprecating humour, which at first he was caught off guard with, and eventually realised you were genuinely serious.

You saw yourself as some pathetic and worthless creature, and the fact that those around you call you that too only added fuel to the fire. A worthless human, something weak and pathetic. You never denied it, and always agreed.

He soon found out you cut yourself, bloodlet, and do all sorts of harm to your body in order to relieve yourself and use it as a coping mechanism.

He began to worry about you, not just for the sake of the student exchange program. There were plenty of demons in the Devildom, and you were an easy victim.

You never fought back when someone picked on you, you never denied it when someone degraded your existence, and you didn’t even bother if your harming was obvious or not, so long as you calmed yourself.

He finally confronted you when you took it too far one day, sitting in your bathtub, soaked in blood. You were running late to dinner, and Lucifer’s bad feeling made him come find you. It felt good to you, great. It was addictive. The one thing you could control- the amount of agony you endured. You were so bored of life, that this is the only thrill you got.

He began screaming at you, and immediately picked you up and began to wrap bandages around your arm, and kept yelling that you shouldn’t do this, and you are taking it too far.

You were about to brush him off when he yelled out that if you’re trying to die, this isn’t funny.

It made you pause. Was he, concerned? About someone like you? But, why? Why did you a small human in this vast world matter to him?

He could tell what you were thinking and sighed. He couldn’t believe how you were raised, to think of yourself as insignificant. Even though he was known as the prideful demon of sin, he admitted to you that he does care about you, and doesn’t want to see you dead.

It pained him to see you struggle to understand him or accept that he was genuinely concerned for you. Anymore time that you were bullied, he’d scare off the demons, or anytime you talked shit about yourself, he would tell you to stop.

Mammon

The first time you met Mammon, he degraded you. He told you that you were stupid. A human couldn’t survive. Don’t talk to him or rely on him.

And that’s exactly what you did- you never bothered him. You believed every word that he had said to you. You didn’t want to be a bother, so every time you passed a demon who intimidated you, you kept your mouth shut and endured it.

You couldn’t win against one, anyways. Even if you could, what would that do? You’d just cause problems. You always caused problems wherever you go, so why don’t you be good for once?

In the comfort of your own room, you cut. You choked. You took a needle and dragged it across your arm, and poke, poke, poke. Droplets of red stained your arm and the carpet, with your tears falling down mixing in.

You hissed and whimpered to yourself, trying not to bother anyone around you with your loud whining.

It was then that Mammon entered your room, and saw what was happening. He was going to steal something, but stopped. What the fuck did you think you were doing?

He grabbed the needle from you and threw it aside and practically yelled at you. You were frozen and scared, shivering and clutching your body curling to brace yourself for the hit.

The hit never came, and he slowly eased you open again. He never knew humans were so high maintenance. He may not know you, but he’s not actually going to let you die.

You explained to him that you felt worthless, and he told you to just leave him alone. Die while you’re at it. He felt extremely bad.

He didn’t think you’d actually hurt yourself, or that you’d not go to him for help. He’s the great Mammon! If you begged, he would of let you seen a good side of him.

From that moment he apologises, sort of, in his own little way.

And he starts to protect you and comes over and clings to you, claiming this is how his human will stop their self-doubt and love themself

Leviathan

He could tell pretty early on. He saw your anxiety and the way you would curl away from people, listening to music, and how you would clench your fists when someone would talk to you.

You had severe anxiety from what he could tell, but didn’t exactly notice the self harm scars you had. He did not want to get involved, but could not just leave you like that when he knew.

He gave you some anxiety medication, which caused you to panic due to thinking you’d be yelled at again, and by a stranger no less. You started to yell sorrys and it’s my fault, and began to violently shake.

He’s seen enough anime with shitty parents to understand that you were more than likely afraid of people.

He allows you to play his games, and see his fish, but you were so scared to move, but when you came to it you were too scared to say no.

After a few minutes, he could see that you were scratching yourself to the point of bleeding, and that you were not doing okay. When he was about to say something, you got startled and fell on your face. Your shirt slightly riled up revealing bruises on your stomach.

It was a lot worse than he originally realised, and even signed up for. He just wanted to give you anxiety medication. But if he went that far, may aswell go another mile, right?

He ends up coaxing you overtime to come to his room, and slowly stops you from curling around him, or begging him for forgiveness.

He has to keep the majority of his brothers away, which is no problem, since he’s an otaku.

You finally ease up to him overtime, and feel a bit more comfortable, enough to speak in full sentences around him. He finds it as a sort of progress, and each time you end up bleeding or hurting yourself, he applies medicine and helps you calm your nerves.

He swears to summon Lotan on your parents, though.

Satan

He could easily tell something was up with you. Just not to that extent. You wore oversized clothes, never held out your handing, constantly pulling on your sleeves, and didn’t look people in the eye.

He was slightly concerned though after an incident in class. The teacher called on you and you barely whispered out the answer, and even got it wrong. You were crying and sniffling to yourself, and as he was seated behind you he could hear it.

He figured out pretty easily that you were afraid of public speaking, and couldn’t handle interaction really well. He decided to read up on a few human books, because he actually pitied you. You looked like you desperately wanted to speak, but at the same time just couldn’t.

He was finally going to approach you when he saw you behind the house, playing with a cat. You had your sleeves pulled up, and there were many cut marks covering your arm.

When the cat scratched you, you jolted back a bit and proceeded to bite your fingernails, muttering to yourself. Walking closer, he could hear you insulting yourself and saying how even an animal couldn’t like a creature like you.

He watched as you ripped the fingernail out with your teeth, and proceeded to scratch at your neck. He was shocked for a moment before pulling your hand from your neck.

This was much more serious than he initially thought. Here you were muttering nonsense to yourself, and harming yourself, he gets that you have anxiety, but why are you going to this extent to cope?

You freaked out when he grabbed you and thrashed about and started to breathe heavily. He tried to slowly calm you, and tried to show he wasn’t an enemy by telling you to wait there while he gets some bandages.

It takes a long time for you to get used to him, probably months, but he sticks by with you trying to make sure your anxiety doesn’t spike, or that you at least stop cutting yourself.

Asmodeous

He screeched when he saw you.

You were littered in scars. Bandages everywhere. Blood coming down from your thigh. You even had an eyepatch. You were grinning with a knife in hand and walked across the living room, and casually sat down.

You ignored his remarks on you, and began to watch your bodily fluids seep. Asmo was unsure how to react. Did you, do that, to yourself? But how would a small human like you be able to do that to yourself and why would you?

He was scared of you at first, from how easily you swung the knife and other forks or needles, but finally convinced you to come to his room. You figured he would bring you some sort of pain or humiliate you since he’s so beautiful, so you came.

You were wrong.

He forces you to discard your weapons and treats you nicely. It baffles you, as he puts lotion, and medicine on your wounds.

You hissed from initial contact and try to run, but he’s pining you down and forcing you to take care of yourself.

He doesn’t know how you did it, or why, but he is going to fix you. Your body had so many knife marks that it didn’t even look human! How could you do that.

He was angry and determined to fix you, and got to work for three hours despite your struggle. When he was finally done, he gasped. Now that he’s managed to comb your ragged hair, change your clothes, and rub your wounds, you actually look really good.

You were annoyed, you wanted to rip it all off. This wasnt exhilirating, only humiliation was.

He yelled at you when you touched your hair, and began to treat you everyday despite your endless attempts of running away.

He confiscated all your sharp objects, even the knife you hid in a teddy bear, and began to slowly work on making you feel better.

Although you were begrudgingly doing it, it felt nice. To gain the attention of someone around you for once, and not because you were covered in blood.

Beelzebub

You and Beel got along pretty well, but you had a dirty secret. You would cut yourself as a coping mechanism, each time you were stressed or felt worthless.

One day however, you took it too far. You cut much more deeper on accident, being startled when you heard a loud thud downstairs, and slit.

You were freaking out, you had never cut so deep, and there was so much blood. You tried applying paper towels upon paper towels, holding it to a towel, washing it, but there was no end.

You started crying and panicking, because you didn’t actually want to die. You just wanted to cut a bit, not actually die from it.

You could only think of turning to someone for help, but you had no clue who other than Beel. You never wanted to show him or tell him that you cut yourself, but you were so worried about being found dead in your bathroom that you ran to him as fast as you could.

You ran to his room, albeit it was actually like a speed walk as you were trying to hold your arm. You banged loudly and when Beel opened the door, he saw you crying and clutching your hand covered in blood.

He immediately got protective and thought someone had done this to you, but first had to calm you down. He brought you in and disinfected the wound, and started to put a gauze on your wrist. He then wrapped some bandages around semi-tightly, and got you some snacks.

He was about to ask you what happened, but you confessed it to him out of fear. You told him about how you cut- and how you took it too far. You didn’t intend to cut so deep, and you were so so scared.

You were slightly hysterical and he had to calm you. He took it in slightly concerned, but didn’t think it was right to yell at you. You seemed to deeply regret it and seemed to be so scared yourself.

He proceeded to take all your knives and weapons, and spent even more time with you. He would never let you cut around him, and if you did, he would immediately cuddle you and refuse to allow you to harm yourself again.

He felt really sad he didn’t notice sooner, but was slightly happy you came to him first and are slowly recovering with his help.

Belphegor

The first time you died you didn’t even attempt to dodge him, you just accepted your fate. Too bad you weren’t actually dead, you thought.

After the whole ordeal, Belphie apologises to you and you were just so nonchalant saying you didn’t mind, and you already have a bunch of wounds so one more wouldn’t hurt.

He sees you lifting your shirt up to show him your cut marks, and he’s just like ??? Is there something wrong with you. He feels bad for trying to kill you now.

You weren’t supposed to accept death, right? Humans are beyond strange. He knows he doesn’t have the right to tell you not to hurt yourself when he literally just tried to kill you, but he wasn’t going to just let you die. Again.

He’s very awkward approaching it. On one hand he doesn’t know you, and on the other he doesn’t want you to hurt yourself. And why aren’t any of his brothers saying anything?

His brothers are casual about it too at this point, because they can’t stop you. Even when they try, you still go back to your old habits. Slightly pisses him off.

He pulls you into his arms when he goes to sleep, and makes sure you don’t have access to your weapons. He holds you just tight enough so you can’t escape him to do who knows what.

You progressively start to lose interest in harming yourself. You only did it for the feeling, and out of habit, but Belphie is constantly sleeping and dragging you into bed with him, so you’re unable to do it.

He will never directly admit that he wanted to stop you from cutting, though. Still upset at himself for trying to kill you.

#obey me #obey me swd #obey me shall we date #obey me hc #obey me headcanon

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n-blanca-archived · 4 years

Text

↳ CLASS 1-A HC’S TO MAKE YOU SMILE (hopefully)

A/N: i’ve been on class-1a brainrot (yes, all of them. collectively) for SO LONG and honestly? I love it here. romance is all good and dandy but FRIENDSHIP? good shit.

on that note, these pairings are all platonic! just little things i like about their dynamics or things i think they’d do when they hang out :) feel free to see them as romantic though, not like i can stop you :P

p.s sorry for dipping??? for like months???

genre: fluff

warnings: minor situational angst

→ Denki & Izuku

❑ These two boys are the other’s hype-man, totally. Kaminari absolutely does not mind sitting through Izuku’s ravings about the fluctuating hero rankings, or even just the times where Izuku mutters on and on.

❑ Kaminari’s been ignored enough times to know that it doesn’t feel good at all to want to talk to someone and for them to sheepishly tell you they’d long since stopped listening. Izuku does the same for Denki, no question. Sometimes Denki starts talking, and he doesn’t really...stop.

❑ But Izuku finds it’s nice to hang out with the boy, and he doesn’t mind not contributing to the conversation when Denki looks so elated to see someone listening for once.

❑ While I will forever be the number one advocate for Bakugou tutoring Denki and finding different studying strategies that work for Denki instead of giving up on him, I think Izuku’s just as likely to do that for kami!

❑ It’s a frustrating first session, but once Izuku’s brian suggests that Kami might just need another method of studying, he takes that idea and runs with it.

❑ The next week, kami goes to Izuku’s room a little afraid of the freckled boy rejecting him- but to his surprise, Izuku presents him with all types of new study methods, including colored index cards and a home-made sentence reader that covered the entire page except for one line at a time.

❑ (yes, he did tear up for a second.)

❑ They end up going through that week's chapter in half the time it usually took Denki to get a subject, and they got to play video games afterward!

→ Ochako & Katsuki

❑ While I don't think the boys in 1-A look down on the girls in the sense of "but they're girls so they are weaker :(" all that much- Katsuki was the first and only one really to make that clear. He didn't see her as something or someone to pity. She was an opponent and a damn capable one at that.

❑ So, yes. Maybe Ochako and Katsuki aren't exactly best friends who'd die for each other. But they’ve proven to each other that if there's someone who'll bring their all to a fight no matter the circumstance, it's each other.

❑ Ochako’s weariness when it came to Katsuki was short lived. It was kind of hard to be so...afraid of someone who treated you better than others seemed to coddle her when she told them she was a hero-in-training.

❑ It starts small, too. At first it was just teaming up occasionally during class for spars. Then it was going to the gym after school with Katsuki and Eijirou.

❑ Tiny little hang-outs like that then turn into joining the blonde on his morning runs every once in a while, and eventually Ochako found herself seeking out Bakugou every weekend, and the blonde seemed to be on the same mind-track, too. Every Sunday, when Ochako pulled open the front door, she spotted Katsuki, stretching out in the front lawn, waiting for her.

❑ (and if they occasionally have breakfast together after their bi-weekly sunday training sessions, then that's their business.)

→ Shouto & Eijirou

❑ them hanging out wasn't really ever. Expected. Like, at all.

❑ but kirishima's shown that he has a knack for weird, almost hostile awkward boys with low friend counts

❑ so shouto fits right in

❑ really it starts when Kirishima finds Shouto in the common room, staring into space. Usually he'd leave him be, but it was weird to see the boy without his group of friends joining him

❑ in an effort to get to know shouto better, kiri offers to play a few rounds of super smash bros,,, and shouto just. blinks. at him. And kiri blinked back for a second before he realizes shouto didn't know what super smash bros was

❑ and of course, to kiri, that's absolute blasphemy

❑ so kiri abandons his trip to the kitchen in favor of sitting next to shouto on the couch, and teaching him how to play as many video games as they could fit in one night

❑ (the first time kiri sees shouto laugh, he can't help the way his face splits into a grin. Todoroki, while not mean, was someone who came off as cold most of the time, so to see him so relaxed made Eijirou feel warm.)

❑ somehow it becomes a regular thing-- shouto would come downstairs, and eventually Kirishima would show up. Sometimes they were both alone, sometimes they were surrounded by their friend groups. But every time without fail, Kirishima would take his place next to shouto, hand him the blue controller that he favored, and turned on the TV to select the first game they'd be playing

❑ (watching Shouto start to gain some of Kirishima's vernacular was also an interesting - read:hilarious - experience)

→ Mina & Yuga

❑break dancing buddies

❑ like. I'm not kidding these two have moves.

❑ well. Mina does, at least. Aoyama gets it pretty quickly but it took him a second to familiarize himself with how your body moves when your break dancing.

❑ aoyama's danced ballet most of his life, so dancing wasn't new to him

❑ but this particular type of dancing was new to him- so of course he reached out to mina after the UA festival

❑ mina, ever the angel, agreed!!!!! Dancing buddies!!!

❑ Mina's also loved dance for a good amount of time

❑ it started in middle school, and just carried into highschool. The idea of being to express yourself with your /body/ was exciting, plus you looked really cool while doing it too!

❑ so when she gets asked by Aoyama to teach him how to breakdance she's nervous, but completely giddy to be able to be someone else's intro to a hobby that was a big part of her life

❑ it's not an uncommon sight to see mina and Aoyama, in their workout clothes, working through moves Step by step with Mina's phone blasting some random song that was beat heavy

❑ (Aoyama would be an interesting extra add on to the bakusquad. Am I wrong? No 🚗)

→ Hanta & Tsuyu

❑ Sero never really interacted with tsuyu, not to say he didn't like her! she just wasn't in his social circle

❑ so to say he felt awkward when he found her in the corner of the library during free period- curled up and sniveling away - was an understatement

❑ still, he put down the fourth issue of a manga he was /really/ looking forward to catching up on, and sat next to her until she calmed down enough to tell him what's wrong

❑ turns out, winter always sucked and made her tired, which made her sad. Added on to the already existing amphibian instincts in her that hated loud noises or too many people, it could get really overwhelming for her

❑ Sero offered to let her into his room whever she wanted to hang out in the quiet, if she felt embarrassed to do so with her closer friends

❑ she seemed surprised, but quickly agreed.

❑ Sero wouldn't tell her, but he often felt the same in a sense. The only two people in his friend group who could be relatively quiet in more personal settings were Bakugou, ironically, and Kirishima. So he often found himself leaving group hang-outs just a little early, to destress in his quiet room.

❑ tsuyu hadn't expected him to stay with her, and especially not offer his room to her whenever she needed to get away. Still, she agreed, knowing she'd probably never take him up on his offer

❑ she was proven wrong three days later, when Ochako squealed about...something.

❑ tsuyu couldn't say for sure what the floaty girl was yelling about. Normally she was attentive, really! But her head was throbbing and she was on the verge of falling asleep then and there when Ochako burst into a loud yell of excitement, startling the frog-like girl

❑ so tsuyu gathered her stuff as quickly as her sluggish body allowed, rushed out a quick goodbye to her baffled friends and made her way to the dorms

❑ the elevator was a struggle, with the humming of the machinery almost lulling her to sleep. She made it out successfully, though due to her drowsiness and increasingly blurring vision, she realized just a little too late that she had wandered down the wrong hallway

❑ sero's name plate made her stutter in her tracks, but after a moment of deliberation that left her swaying on her feet, she knocked as strongly as she could on the thin door, hoping the lanky boy was in his room

❑ thankfully, he was, and he only offered her a small smile before ushering her into the room and guiding her to his bed. Tsuyu thinks she croaked out a tiny "thanks", but she couldn't really be sure

❑ she slept better in those 39 minutes than she had in weeks

❑ after that, tsuyu somehow got into the habit of wandering down the opposite hallway once she left the elevator, and most of the time Sero would open his door when she knocked, only giving her a smile before letting her wander to his bed or, more commonly, the pile of blankets and bean bags he had in a corner of his room.

❑ (she wouldn't admit it, and neither would he, but the times where they walked back to his dorm together once their free period began were their favorites. and the days where tsuyu wasn't so sleepy and they talked for the hour they had weren't so bad, either)

okokok i’m cutting it here since that last section was super long! who knew i had so much to say about hanta and tsuyu ,,,,

anyway! this was super fun, so i’ll definitely be doing stuff like this more in the future. if you have two characters you’d particularly like to see, don’t be afraid to jump into my ask box!

#class 1a #class 1a headcanons #blanca.txt #bnha #mha #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #denki kaminari #izuku midoriya #uraraka ochako #bakugou katsuki #shouto todoroki #kirishima eijirou #mina ashido #yuga aoyama #hanta sero #tsuyu asui

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aitarose · 4 years

Text

PROLOGUE | READ CH.1 [UNEDITED] HERE

PAIRING: Zuko x Waterbender!Reader [fem]

PLOT: Princess Y/N finds herself falling for the young Fire Nation prince with the shy smile. As their feelings grow, the childhood lovers face unimaginable challenges together.

TIMEFRAME: Winter 90 AG

WARNINGS: angst, separation

WORD COUNT: 3.4k

A/N: i’m rewriting the chapters i currently have posted as my writing has improved since i first created this series. the prologue is now a mix of the original work and the leaving the north extra.

SERIES MASTERLIST

Crystal clear streams of water circled in repetition around the young Northern princess. Droplets of water failed to rain down onto the stark icy ground as her control was near to perfection.

Y/N’s arms swayed at her sides, her mind fully concentrated on the actions that she was igniting in her vicinity. Soft hums escaped her lips, finding joy in the calming nature that waterbending brought her.

The waning moonlight sparkled around her, giving her a ghostly look and causing her to look like a lost phantom in the wind. The smile on her face was haunting, the look being of pure and utter bliss.

Her footsteps tread lightly, barely making a path on the snow covered hill. Y/N looked to her left amidst her dance, spotting her shadow against the white powder and grinned at the sight.

All that she could see was her silhouette, which was oozing undeniable joy and freedom. Y/N was at one with her most true self—the cause of that true self being the element of water.

Waterbending was the definition of Y/N’s comfort zone. Having the skill mastered at such a young age was unheard of, but it was also the thing that she loved most in the world.

The members of the Northern tribe commonly said that Y/N’s ambition would be the end of her. That her drive for success and perfection would be her great downfall—but in the six-year-old’s mind, it was the one thing that put her at ease.

That and her favorite person in the entire world. Her favorite person who was just drenched in the formerly suspended water. The person who was glaring at her with the most bothered expression Y/N had ever seen.

“It’s freezing!” Yue cried out, wringing out her hair whilst Y/N laughed, falling to the ground in a fit of giggles. Both girls were drenched in water, their formal attire beginning to stick to their bodies in the cold air.

The baffled expression on Yue’s face gave Y/N more joy than the waterbending itself. It wasn’t uncommon for Y/N to give her half-sister a hard time, but at the end of the day Yue loved her, no matter how far her antics were taken.

“Oh, so you think this is funny?” Yue raised her eyebrows, placing her hands on her hips in overall amusement. She opened her mouth wide to give Y/N her next dig. “I’m not the one who looks like a sea sponge!”

Y/N scoffed as she pulled at her frozen clothing, blowing the straying strings of hair away from her clouded eyes. A disgusted look dawned her face in retaliation to Yue’s attempt at an insult.

Yue was naturally kind, nearly incapable of showing bitterness and resentment. Even when her words were in good fun, Y/N hated to see her better half act in any negative way. It simply wasn’t her.

Y/N, herself, on the other hand was the polar opposite of Yue. She was hard on the surface, holding her head high, rather than cowering in fear. She knew that the world wasn’t all good or all bad as she was a realist.

The princesses rivaled each other in every way, but also found true balance in the fact. Yue’s reserved nature versus Y/N’s boldness made them the perfect pair.

However, when they disagreed, though that rarely ever happened, Y/N was always the last to apologize. She’d never admit that she felt inferior to Yue. Their inborn rivalry was unspoken but also undeniable.

As Yue would always have the thing that Y/N wanted most in the world. The one thing that was stolen from her due to her birthright. She’d always be the black sheep of the North without the unconditional love of their people.

The unconditional love that they only showed Yue. Yue who was her half-sister—meaning that half of Y/N wasn’t native to the North, but native to the nation that they feared the most—the Fire Nation.

While Y/N and Yue continued to bicker, chasing each other around in circles and lapping the snowmen that they’d created together, their serene playtime was interrupted by a pair of large arms wrapping around Yue’s waist.

The white-haired girl squealed in surprise, her arms flailed chaotically as Arnook chuckled, watching his two daughters with love in his eyes. As Yue settled in his embrace, he rubbed Y/N’s shoulder gently.

“Spirits, you two feel like icicles.” Arnook’s gaze become concerned. He held Yue in his outstretched arms, inspecting her for any bruises or scratches. “Your mother was worried sick, Yue. You can’t run off without telling us first.”

Yue pouted, pointing at Y/N in exasperation. “Y/N wanted to come out and show me some of her new waterbending moves! I’m sorry, father. We were only having fun.”

Y/N let her head drop as Arnook gave her a disappointed look. He’d told her many times that he didn’t want Yue involved in the progress of her bending as her mastery would also be the reason behind her departure.

The royal chieftain nodded his head, gesturing for Y/N to follow as he carried Yue in his arms back towards the palace. The waterbender trudged behind her father, envying her sister’s state of content.

The walk back to the capital was silent, the only sounds being Yue’s faint snores drifting off in the wind. Y/N’s eyes were on the ground, occasionally lifting to watch her father show his love for her sister.

Her footsteps were light, barely leaving marks of fresh powder on the palace floor as she and Arnook gently closed Yue’s bedroom door. They’d each given her a kiss on the forehead before leaving her to sleep.

Arnook sighed, running a hand down the back of his braided hair. He looked down at his little girl, the one that he’d never meant to have but promised to always protect.

His mind was scrambled, thoughts flying everywhere with no place to settle—whilst Y/N’s soul was unhinged. It was as if it was drifting away, not able to settle in a single place since it never belonged.

“What’s going to happen to me, father?” Y/N whispered, her body shaking in anticipation for what was to come of her fate in the morning. “Why do I have to go away?”

Fear consumed Arnook’s emotions. Fear for the safety of his tribe, the fate of his daughter, the future of his people. He didn’t know what would become of his eldest child—but whatever did happen to Y/N, he knew that it was entirely his fault.

She was only a child. A child that was to be forced to become a slave to the Fire Nation, another pawn in their game to win the war. Arnook had been given six years to raise her under the peace treaty.

The peace treaty that ensured that his eldest waterbending child would be the punching bag of the Fire Nation’s royal family. The treaty that prevented her from having a loving and nurturing childhood.

When he’d first made the deal with Fire Lord Azulon, Arnook hadn’t thought twice about the fate of his future child. He’d agreed for Lady Homura to be sent to the North to mother the infant, not wanting it to be of full Northern blood.

His thought was that if the child was half of Fire Nation genes, he wouldn’t feel so close to it. That he wouldn’t grow to love it as his own, since it wouldn’t truly be a part of his people.

However, what he didn’t take into account was the sight of her beautiful blue eyes and the goodness that radiated from them. At first glance, Arnook knew that he’d do anything to take back his promise—that he’d do anything for his firstborn daughter.

And when she became ill with the sickness that Yue would later contract at birth, he and Homura immediately took her to the spirits—thanking them graciously when the ocean lent its power to extend her lifeline.

Their time as a family was something he’d never forget, but have to learn to live without as their time was up. They didn’t have a sparring moment, not a day left to bask in the glory of being together.

The six years had gone by in a flash, the Fire Nation navy was arriving at dawn, and Y/N and her mother were to be whisked away at once—but at least Y/N was lucky enough to have one final laugh with her sister, making snowmen and dancing under the moonlight.

With her question having remained unanswered, Y/N turned away from her father and sadly left the hall, opening the door to her own bedroom in a hurry to avoid any more of the depressing mood.

She nestled herself beneath her covers, wrapping the blankets around her shivering body. Her mind was restless, insomnia overwhelming her exhaustion and keeping her awake until morning.

Morning which had come far too quickly. Y/N had done her best to ignore the callings and worrying that came from her mother. All she wanted was to run away, to be alone and at peace with her bending wherever she chose to rest.

But Homura had other plans. She needed this transaction to go smoothly, her wish was to make her daughter’s life relieved of the immense stress. She wanted Y/N to be a child without the heinous responsibilities that had been thrust upon her.

So, as they said their final goodbyes, Homura watched Y/N’s expressions. She watched how her daughter put on a brave face, how she shook her father’s hand rather than giving him a hug.

It was a saddening sight to see. A mere child, a six-year old girl, giving up her entire world to please a man who put his honor over his own family. A man who was letting his flesh and blood enter the lion’s den.

However, in Y/N’s mind this was perfectly normal. She was content with the interaction, considering the love Arnook had once shown her had diminished over the years.

This was their final moment as father and daughter. A moment of silence and respect for the act they were following through with. There was no love in their exchange, but apologies for the future of their bond.

Their bond that would inevitably be broken by the influence and hardships that the Fire Nation would teach Y/N. After all, a child has the most influential brain of any living being.

The minute Y/N and Homura stepped foot on the navy ship, they’d become members of the rivaling nation. Members of the nation that threatened lives and good fortunes.

But a second before boarding the militant boat, Y/N paused to wave a goodbye to her sister who’d been calling out to her in agony. Yue’s cries could be heard over the crowd’s roar, despair ringing in the breeze.

Y/N’s gaze met Yue’s tear-filled eyes. She pursed her lips into a sad smile, giving her an acknowledging nod, and turned away—disappearing in the vast sea of Fire Nation soldiers.

The heat was indescribable, differing greatly from the cold and sullen air that Y/N was used to. The sun was clear in this part of the world, no clouds or mountains blocking its natural light.

Beams of gold reflected off the towers of the palace and the top of the soldier’s helmets. Everything appeared to be shiny, sparkling, and new in direct relation to the power the nation held.

Not to mention that the only visible color was red. Red tapestries of frightening men, crimson artifacts lining the shelfs, torches filled with waning fire hung from the walls—it was all so intimidating.

Homura was shaking with fear beside her daughter, clinging onto her arm tightly. She hadn’t been to her home country since the talk of her daughter’s conception, choosing to reside in the North rather than face the shame of her deed.

Y/N squeeze her mother’s hand, sensing the nerves that were radiating off of her body like the plague. She looked straight ahead, showing Homura that confidence was the only way to handle the situation.

Despite being the age of six, Y/N had more courage than the average man. She was truly an enigma of her people, of both the Fire Nation and the Northern Water Tribe.

“It’s going to be alright, mother.” The young girl’s face went stoic, all emotion disappearing from her features. Homura would’ve been concerned had it not been for the little finger taps on her palm.

The guards that had been leading them into the palace opened the doors to the grand throne room, leading to the Fire Lord. The mother and daughter pair walked side by side, stepping in synchrony.

They stopped their strut at the large throne, bowing deeply in respect to their new leader, knowing that his policies were to be far different from those of Arnook’s.

Azulon was seated far above the rest of the room’s inhabitants, that being of a woman and a stern man, a girl around Y/N’s age, and a bearded general who was sitting respectively in the corner.

“Fire Lord Azulon,” Homura’s eyes rose from the floor to Azulon. Her lip quivered in anticipation for whatever it was that he would throw at her. “We are honored to be in your presence.”

The older man laughed maniacally, his placid expression turning into a sneer. Y/N noticed the coldness behind his amber irises and the apathetic look in his steely glare.

“Homura.” He looked down his nose, disgusted at the sight of her pleading face. “How humbling it must’ve been for you, a Lady of my nation, to become nothing but a mistress for a water tribe savage.”

Y/N’s head shot up in anger as she noticed her mother flinching in retaliation to his comments. She opened her mouth to speak, thankfully being interrupted by sparse giggles coming from the other child in the room.

The waterbender’s eyes narrowed at the girl, noticing how she presented herself. She was obviously important, the vanity that she expressed was evident of itself. Y/N could only assume that she must be the infamous Princess Azula.

While Y/N found frustration in Azula’s amusement, her father, Ozai, was entertained. He seemed to be used to his daughter’s sociopathic tendencies. He waved his hand aimlessly at her, causing her to quickly quiet down.

“Calm now, Azula.” Ozai gestured to the woman sitting next to him, causing her to stand obediently and approach Y/N with ease. “We have some more terms to discuss, without any children present.”

Homura let go of Y/N’s hand, her daughter hanging on as long as she possibly could to show her support and love. She frowned, leaving the throne room, wishing that she could stay and comfort her frightened mother.

However, there was an unspoken comfort in Ursa’s presence. Something that Y/N had failed to feel in all of her brief time in the Fire Nation thus far. It was obvious that Ursa was unlike any of her companions.

They swiftly made their way past the various guards and tapestries in the interior of the palace, entering a sunlit garden filled with a vast array of fire lilies and turtle ducks.

“Come sit, my dear.” Ursa took a seat on the ledge of the fountain, patting the spot next to her. The long sleeves of her robes dipped into the water as she welcomed Y/N with ease.

The waterbender happily obliged, already feeling comfortable with the woman that she could now call a friend—her first friend that she’d made in the Fire Nation.

As she sat, Y/N took Ursa’s hands in hers, noticing the sopping fabric dripping onto her lap. The girl slowly began to separate the water from her soaked clothing, the beads of dew landing in the streaming fountain.

Ursa watched in awe, admiring the natural skill and passion Y/N displayed in her bending. She’d never seen waterbending in person, but she could only assume that it was a beautiful art by the way Y/N was delicately performing it.

“Thank you,” Ursa whispered, the warmth in her heart growing solemn as she realized what would become of Y/N’s skill and purpose. “You have a kind soul, Princess Y/N.”

“But as long as you remain in this palace, the future will not treat you kindly.” Her brows furrowed, sympathizing with the struggles Y/N would come to face. “My husband expects you to be an opponent that matches Azula’s skill.”

The light behind Ursa’s eyes went dull as she recalled all of the horrible and dishonorable things her husband had done throughout their marriage. “I only wish that I could protect you from the pain that he’ll cause.”

Y/N shook her head in retaliation, a hardened look dawning her face. She’d grown up hearing stories about Azulon and his dangerous son. She knew what they were capable of, yet she wasn’t afraid. She couldn’t afford to be afraid.

Her stoney gaze locked with Ursa’s one of sadness. They held their stare for a moment, a mutual understanding spoken between them. A grim smile eventually rose on the woman’s lips, before taking notice of Y/N’s eyes.

On the left laid a beautiful dark blue iris, similar to the depths of the dark ocean and the strength that it represented—and on the right, was a dim white in comparison to the stunning blue.

The waterbender’s mismatched sight was a direct result from her illness as an infant. A direct result from the borrowed power of the ocean spirit, La, that was still inhabiting her body.

It was infatuating, the allure of Y/N’s eyes was of nothing that she had ever seen before. A spark of hope rose in Ursa from her new knowledge, a belief was born that perhaps this girl could help this world become good again.

Perhaps Y/N could help her own children become good, truly good despite the influence of their father. Azula was already nearing evil, but Zuko—Ursa knew that her son was better than that.

“Mother?” A faint voice rang through the courtyard, startling Ursa and Y/N and causing them to jump apart. The princess’ gaze searched her surroundings for the owner of the voice, landing on a small boy.

He looked to be her age, perhaps a year or so older than her. She knew he had to be Prince Zuko, there was no other explanation to the way he was carrying around a woven basket full of bread like he owned the place.

“I asked the servants if they had any leftovers for the turtle ducks, and they gave me this whole stack!” Zuko exclaimed, the excitement was noticeable in his voice as he watched where he stepped.

He opened his mouth in preparation to express his happiness to his mother, before his eyes met Y/N’s. Zuko froze in place, analyzing the girl and her appearance.

It was well known that the arrival of Lady Homura and her daughter was earlier that morning. Zuko had skipped out on the first meeting, having dreamt up a million other things to do than meet another snobby princess.

But as he saw her for the first time, Zuko felt somewhat of a connection. It was unexplainable in words, the feelings so intricate and immense. There was just something about her that Zuko couldn’t put his finger on.

Y/N herself was having a similar realization at the sight of the prince. Rather than noticing his entire appearance, she settled on the color of his eyes and how different they were to that of his father’s.

The amber in them reflected off of the water in the fountain, shimmering in the sunlight that bounced off of the cherry blossom trees. She could tell that he was the black sheep of the royal family as his eyes held something that no others did—they were kind.

“You must be Princess Y/N.” Zuko calmly said, setting down his basket in front of her and offering her one of the loafs. “I’m Zuko. Would you like to feed the turtle ducks with me?”

Y/N smiled, her first genuine smile in the entirety of her time in the Fire Nation, and nodded, taking it in her palm. She moved aside so he had a seat on the ledge, feeling complete in his presence.

“I’d love to.”

NEXT: CHAPTER ONE [UNEDITED]

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