#it is what i use to deal with any emotion outside of generally happy or vague nothingness

[girlscience]

i genuinely think fanfic might be ruining my life

[mysticheathenn]

What's You're Soul Contract?

Hi, Hexlings!

This pick-a-card reading is about what your soul agreed upon coming to earth. Did you come here to be successful? Break Generational Trauma? Did you come here just for the fun of it? This pick-a-card may help give you more clarity and guidance on why you are here on Earth.

This is a general reading, remember to take what resonates and leave what does not. This reading does not supplement your need to seek professional help. Tarot should be used as entertainment and not a for sure answer to your problems but as a guide, a sense of hope, and amusement.

Take your time when choosing your pile. Ask yourself the question and choose the picture that you can’t stop looking at. Listen to your intuition.

MasterList

Patreon Link

Ko-Fi Donations

NEXT PAC: Patreon Related (I just don't know what as of yet) If you have any suggestions feel free to send them.

Sorry, I have been M.I.A. Depression really is a bitch, but I'm doing better still under the weather but better. I hope everyone is doing well. I missed and love you guys.

Pile l:

What is your Soul Contract? Tarot: 6 of Cups, Ace of Swords, 3 of Wands, 10 of Cups, 10 of Wands, Page of Cups.

Breaking Generational Trauma/Curses. You have a lot of cups and wand energy pile l. This means your pile is all about pent-up fiery emotions that have been denied an avenue to being expressed whether in your lifetime or over the many generations before you. You probably grew up in a household where you are supposed to "stay in a child's place" or "you should be seen not heard." Some of you have to deal with constantly seeing your parents, grandparents, or family in general struggling with money or hating what they do for work but it puts food on the table and clothes on your back but at the end of the day they took out their frustrations on you. I'm hearing "Money is burning a hole in my pocket." Maybe you have one of those parents where you went to your room as soon as they came home because they were always in a bad mood because of how stressed they were or they are penny pinchers like Julius from "Everybody Hates Chris" I heard "That's .49 cents of spilled milk dripping on my table. Somebody is going to drink this milk. Clip Link." They may even hit you for spilling juice even if it were an accident. Either way, you vowed long ago that you were going to break the chains of what your ancestors have passed down. You want to live a life where you can come home to and feel at peace and happy. You want to be that parent that lets your kids feel like they can express themselves while establishing healthy boundaries. Some of you I am even hearing will never stay with someone for the sake of the kids like some of your parents have done. You overall want to live a life where you don't have to apologize, walk on eggshells, or be miserable. Your soul contract is basically to live your life outside the boundaries of what your ancestors have placed on each generation and to pass that same freedom on to those around you or your kids. You are meant to live out loud and maybe even cut off family members if you feel called to do that. I am even hearing that some of you are in the process of re-parenting your parents. Helping or teaching them that the ways of what they knew are wrong and that if they want to remain in your life they need to make changes.

Pile ll:

What is your Soul Contract? Tarot: Page of Pentacles, The World, The Sun, 8 of Pentacles, Queen of Swords

Independence/Financial Abundance. Your soul contract reminds me a bit of pile l but only 1% of it when it deals with breaking trauma/curses surrounding money. You probably grew up if not poor you grew up okay. While you weren't poor your family wasn't rich or even middle class, they were a little above working paycheck to paycheck. For some of you, this has nothing to do with growing up poor but more so with wanting a better life for yourself so you can provide for those around you especially if you are close to family. If not family you may just want Fuck you money to lavishly spend. Some of you want to pay off your parent's mortgage or buy them their dream car. Whatever it is as everyone has their personal reasoning for why they want financial abundance or independence, you are placed here to experience riches and create abundance. I am hearing that some of you want to make a change within the world. You want to grow a business where employees are treated fairly and paid a living wage. This reminds me of the CEO who took a pay cut so he could give all his employees including himself a starting salary of 70k. You want to help out the needy and give back to whatever you can, I'm hearing about finding new solutions to food waste for very few of you. Either way, you are meant to be your own boss. You were never meant to work underneath someone and I feel quite a few of you have been feeling that feeling for quite a while now but don't know how to break the chains, don't have a business idea/where to start, or don't know how to get the funding to start your business idea. Just remember to ask and you shall receive speak to your guides and ask them for help, a sign, or to put someone in your path who can help you out. In the meantime, please be careful with who you share your ideas with. Some of you are too trusting with your friends and family group not knowing they are waiting to see you fail or talk you out of the idea because they want you to remain in the same position as them knowing they could never amount to half your potential. Some of them remind me of the popular TikTok trend from Snowfall "Me. I built this shit. Brick by Brick and I'll be dam if you tear it down because you don't like the way another n*gga talk." Some also just want to latch onto you, remember not everyone is meant to walk the same path. Some people are meant to be left behind or they will keep you in the same place as you are now with wanting handouts, filling you with limiting beliefs, etc.

Pile lll:

What is your Soul Contract? Tarot:10 of Cups/10 of Pentacles, The Wheel, 4 of Cups, The Tower (clarified by the Chariot), The Hermit

Divinity / Spiritual Growth/ Light & Love. You may be seeing the number 1010 everywhere pile lll. You have the 10 of Pentacles, 10 of Cups, and The Wheel is the 10th card in my "The Muse Tarot Deck." The 1010 angel number serves as a guiding light, illuminating your journey in love, money, and spiritual growth. You were placed on this earth to spread light and love, becoming the embodiment of it, and to walk a spiritual path. For some of you this spiritual path may be a religious path, take what resonates and leave what does not. I mostly feel this is a spiritual group because of the symbolism on each card that came out for you. Some of you are leaving your religious background for spirituality because you saw how religion has turned the people around you into the complete opposite of what they teach during Sunday service, some of you are leaving because you felt that the religion doesn't align with you anymore and you feel lost but somehow spirituality has been calling your name and has done some things for you but you feel some type of guilt surrounding it because of your upbringing. For others of you, this may be vice versa where you decide to go back to church, etc. Again take what resonates and leave what does not, either way, you are finding your way back to god (Universe, Allah, Source, etc) and wanting to bring more harmony, love, and community into your life. You probably have been going through some changes recently and for some of you who are atheist or agnostic and experiencing the feeling of being lost, like the way you are living can't just be this, or feeling that there is no way that you are here to just take up space and struggle. You are trying to find more meaning in life because you are on the verge of a mental breakdown or may even have thoughts of suicide because of how alone you have been feeling. Overall you were meant to find yourself. You are meant to come back to yourself through spiritual or religious means. Finding a community that shows you that there is light and love in this world and you aren't alone nor placed here as a waste of space or to struggle. I heard God loves the little children bible school song and this little light of mine. I feel those two songs are to let you know that within the darkness there is always a bit of light at the end of the tunnel you just can't see it because you're honed into the darkness not looking for the light. Also that you are loved whether you feel that way or not. Your community is out there, don't give up.

Pile lV:

What is your Soul Contract? Tarot: Queen of Wands, 9 of Pentacles, Knight of Cups, 4 of Swords, 4 of Cups, 10 of Wands (reversed)

Love/Beauty/Life. You may be seeing 44 or 444 everywhere pile lV. That is for just a few of you not everyone but pile lV your soul contract, the reason you are here is to experience all of life's beauty, glory, and love. Your pile somewhat reminds me of pile lll but only 1% of it is about finding yourself, but for a few of you the whole reading might resonate also. Anyway, you are here to experience being human. I mean after all, you are a spiritual being having a human experience. Some of you probably wonder why you go through tough times or maybe get pissed off at even small inconveniences and I'm here to let you know it's all a part of your process, mission, and experience. You are meant to see life's beauty, travel, fall in love, get your heart broken, make life-long friends, have your first fight, lose all of your money, win the lottery.... all of it...do you hear me? You are meant to experience the good with the bad. The small details of life like Starbucks's pumpkin spice lattes to the smell of books in the library or book store. You signed up to also find yourself amongst experiencing all the large and small things in life. To live your life unapologetically and to be free from what society has placed on what it is to being a human, an adult, etc. If you haven't seen the movie Soul by Pixar/Disney I highly recommend it as this is literally your pile. You were meant to say what goes for your life and what does not because everything is temporary. You know the question "If you were on your deathbed what would your regrets be? What would you have wished you would have done more of? What would you have done less of? Those questions that people love to ask old people.....that is your soul contract. To be asked on your death bed some of those questions and being able to say you lived life exactly how you wanted to live it: Beautifully, authentically, boldly, and filled with love and freedom surrounded by those you love and who deeply love and express their love for you. While you are meant to experience some struggle as it is a part of the human experience you are not meant to live one that is traditional, rigid, or stale. Go bungee jumping, get a tattoo sleeve (or fake one), take risks and ask out the guy first, and write that book that has been on your mind even if you don't plan on sharing it. Overall, do you boo, do you. Live life with no regrets. Live life as if Wes Anderson was the director. If you were a book genre it would be coming of age.

Thank you for liking and reblogging my readings. I always appreciate you guys on here and on Patreon.

Stay safe and be blessed

[trexdrabbles]

So I know it was for Apex way back when, but would you be willing to do the "who would be more protective" prompt and the others for Gambit and reader?

First of all damn thank you for snooping through my blog enough to hit that lol, and of course!!

Who's the one to initiate the relationship?

You. 100% you. Shy or not doesn't matter, it would have to be you. Not that Remy wouldn't be thinking about it all constantly, but he'd definitely be the type to tell himself that's it better to keep what you've got going on casual. After the whole deal with Bella Donna and everything between him and Rogue, he's not so much scared of commitment itself, but more like speaking an actual relationship into existence himself would be inviting tragedy in. You tell him it's what you really want two or three times though and he'll definitely cave and be relieved about it all in the end.

What are their love-languages?

Remy definitely does gift giving (60% are stolen, he's still a thief at heart and finds it fun to watch you guess if he paid for or nicked whatever he's brought home) and quality time. He's definitely the type to enjoy body doubling too, just the both of you doing your own things in the same space. That being said, the man can only go so long in close proximity before needing some amount of touch or affection before he's sated enough to let you be for a bit again.

How open about it are they?

Not even a question, pretty much everyone under the sun is gonna know that you're Remy's partner. So long as he's given the ten seconds to find a way to yap about it, they're gonna know.

Who's the better chef?

I'd say it's pretty even actually. Remy definitely knows his way around the kitchen, but I can definitely see him being the type to have like, 20 or so specific things he can cook flawlessly, and anything outside of that is a bit of a gamble depending on his mood and how well he can actually pay attention to a recipe. He would definitely be eager for your cooking too though and even if he's not the one making food enjoys hanging out in the kitchen to keep you company while you do.

Who likes to be little spoon?

Both again! You more often, definitely (the man is 6'2 after all, perfect big spoon material) but every so often he'd want to switch things up. Mostly after long days, emotion or physical. Feeling your arm around his waist and nose pressed against his shoulder and legs all tangled over his definitely has some kind of healing power for him.

Who flirts more?

Also not really a question or contest. You can compliment and tease and flirt all you like, but Remy will always have you outplayed in that category. He's got a well-practiced and absolutely filthy silver-tongue that he knows how to use to a fault. Hell, his new favorite hobby is finding out just how vibrant a shade of red you're physically capable of turning.

Who's more protective?

Guess what, it's Remy yet again. He might be happy to tell any single with the misfortune of being close enough about you two, but he's not oblivious about the danger your being connected to him and to the X-Men in general could bring. He's knows loss a little too intimately and is ready to do whatever he needs to make damn sure it doesn't happen again.

[mister-mickey]

Outsiders (and twttin) crying hcs because I’m terrible and evil

Darry

- he only cries when he has time to. Like, if he’s busy he will push those feelings down until he isn’t

- when he does actually cry, it’s very quiet. He’s just laying in bed letting the tears stream down his face

Soda

- low key a crybaby. Like he cries even when he’s happy

- blubbery, needs someone around. Like he won’t cry when he’s alone because that’s not what he needs

Pony

- he’s 14 he’s def a bit of a crybaby too. He’s more embarrassed about it than soda

- he, like Darry, wants to be alone and cry when he has time, but he, like soda, emotionally needs the company even if he doesn’t want it

Johnny

- canonly rarely cries. If he does, it’s a big deal

- he’s like empty inside if he’s at that point, probably hugging his knees and hiding away. He’s trying to be quiet too

Steve

- somewhat similar to soda in that he will cry at any extreme emotion, not just sadness. However, he has to be at a much further point than soda does

- he wants to be alone when he cries because he’s embarrassed, but often conversations with soda will pull some tears out that he’s been holding in. Sometimes their hangouts end with soda holding him while Steve just cries

Dally

- he doesn’t cry. He’s too tough to cry (lies)

- he does cry, just not often and certainly not when someone else can see. Usually it’s just a few tears and it’s over, and it’s not for any particular reason.

Twobit

- big baby. He can also fake cry if he needs to

- he ain’t ashamed of his tears, but he won’t cry in front of someone he dislikes or in front of someone he wants to be tough around (like someone younger or something) he will cry in front of his mom though because they have a very open relationship. He’s a mommas boy

Tim

- doesn’t cry, according to himself and also curly and Angela. (Also a lie)

- he won’t cry in front of anyone because he refuses to be weak. But like, it still happens. Usually he’s in bed thinking and he makes himself cry because of that (so me)

Angela

- she has no qualms about crying in front of people, especially her brothers. She has used Tim’s shirt as a tissue and then scolded him for getting his shirt dirty

- she’s a loud crier if she’s with someone, but by herself it’s those silent choking tears that genuinely hurt

Curly

- hates crying but doesn’t have the self control to not cry in front of people. He usually cries when he’s in pain or very very annoyed (maybe Tim and Angela keep pestering him) he doesn’t really cry when he’s sad

- you know those studio ghibli tears? Where they’re round and they just keep coming? That’s him

Bryon

- honestly it would take a lot to make him cry, not because he’s tough, but because it isn’t really thing he ever does. Like he generally just sleeps his feelings off

- if he did cry it’s probably sniffly and gross, and he’s wiping it off on his sleeve and stuff

Mark

- also doesn’t really cry, but that’s more because he’s never really given a reason to, at least not as a teenager

- when he was a kid though he would cry sometimes, probably cuddle up to Bryon’s mom. (That bitch) he’d still get over it fast though.

Cathy

- she cries a lot but not really in front of people unless she knows they can make her feel better.

- she will cry around M&M but not her parents, she will cry with bryon but never around mark. She lets the tears roll down her face as she explains what’s wrong

M&M

- I can’t imagine him crying, but if he did it would be with Cathy because he trusts her and she won’t ever judge him for it

- he leans against her and talks with her as he sniffles and wipes his tears away

[inthemaelstrom]

So we're about six weeks out from another "most important election of my lifetime" and it's predictably making me literally sick to my stomach. When Trumpacabra got elected in 2016, I threw myself into politics in a way I never had in my lifetime and it almost wrecked me. I was one of those people who never voted for religious reasons (long, separate story) and I felt I had to make up for lost time. By the time 2020 rolled around, I was an unhealthy mess. I had stopped reading. Everything. When I wasn't watching MSNBC and political commentators obsessively, I started consuming absolute junk TV: home improvement shows, crack paranormal ghost hunter crap, etc. Things with no plot, no emotional investment, no danger. No fear.

Right before the 2020 election, old fanfic friends from my days in the Master and Apprentice Star Wars listserv found me and saved me.

They dragged me back into fandom, introduced me to Discord, and got me writing again. I updated a story I hadn't touched in 5 years. I made new friends online and in RL. I got some great fiction and fic recs from those friends and discovered a subgenre called Hopepunk—low stakes fiction with very little if any violence and fear and with happy endings. (Becky Chambers writes a lot of what I read, and Amy Crook has also become a favorite.)

One morning, I had one of those really vivid, realistic, linear plot dreams that literally dragged me out of bed to the keyboard. It was a meet-cute modern au of The Phantom Menace's characters, set in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. I cranked out about 2000 words the first day. Then another 2000. Then another 2000. Then another 2000. And so on every damn day for the next four years until I had four novels, about 668k words, several timestamps written by three other collaborators who've come on board, some beautiful art I've been allowed to use, and now a fifth book in the works.

This is the Yooperverse.

It's not just The Fic That Saved Me, it's the place where I'm writing a vision of what the world could be like into being. A place where people with fucking obscene amounts of money don't spend it on themselves, or hoard it, or exploit other people to get more, but use it to help other people. It's a place where people who are bigoted dicks either get their comeuppance and crawl back under their rocks, or learn better and do better. It's a place where abused kids get rescued, everybody gets therapy and healthcare and is paid a living wage, people learn to value themselves and each other, and protect each other and defend each other. It's kinky and queer (although I'm neither) and above all, if not entirely safe to be both, I'm trying to write both things as just being another setting on the dryer. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

It's not a utopia, by any means, because there are still assholes and the government is still ... the government, and capitalism is still a thing. There's some danger, especially in the first book, and there are accidents and illnesses and the vagaries of life. In the middle of the series, I had spinal surgery and was out of commission for a few months and that made me start thinking more about my main character dealing with aging and the limitations thereof. There's a LOT of mental health issues and the working through thereof, and a lot of ongoing process. Nobody's perfect. The world outside is still pretty much what it is. But in the little corners where my characters dwell, life is pretty dang good, sometimes great.

It's a vision of a life we all deserve. It's the thing I loved about Star Trek's universe, where people's basic needs are cared for and the obstacles to them developing their best selves removed. It's what I've loved about science fiction in general, especially Ursula LeGuin's: that opportunity to explore possibilities that are better than the present. It's modeled on the MacArthur Genius grants, but you don't have to prove your worthiness first. My main character invests in people's potential, young or old, with scholarships and grants and a steadying hand. His partner builds low or no-cost housing for people in need. There's an informal network of queer and straight kid rescuing going on under the noses of unfriendly governments and failed social service safety nets. The main characters build refuges, literal and emotional. They love each other fiercely and respectfully.

Right now, we're living in a country that is almost the antithesis of these ideas, for far too many of us. People are being manipulated by their fears, which are stoked by unscrupulous, lying shitbag politicians whose all too real evil would never make it past the pitch if you were going to try to sell it as a TV show or movie. They're consciously turning us on each other with lies about our common humanity, about the state of our country, about who and what's responsible for many of its faults, sewing suspicion and hate. And though the Yooperverse started as my personal comfort fic, I'm trying in my very small way to counteract what's happening in the world right now.

I've always believed in the power of story to change people's minds and lives, and I've experienced it myself. When I talk about story, I don't just mean fiction, though. I mean the narratives we tell ourselves and others about our own lives as a whole and day by day or moment by moment. I mean the stories we tell about each other when we're together, at the bar, at wakes, at a party. I mean the stories we invest in as fans in whatever kind of media we consume. I mean the stories we spin for ourselves and others to explain what the everloving fuck is wrong with the world.

Stories aren't separate from the world, they are the world. They tell it into being. They give it shape and purpose and meaning and a sense of possibility. Whatever stories we tell ourselves or each other about how things should be or how we should act as human beings (also called our "beliefs" or "morals" or "ethics"), they shape us, and we shape society. We are society, both together and as individuals. One person with a big voice and a story can tip a mass of people into either violence or solidarity.

I have no illusions that the Yooperverse will ever have that kind of power. It has a tiny audience on AO3 and Discord and it's mostly written for me to explore the things I feel deeply about, and wish I could do, and to teach myself to be a better person and live up to my own ideals. It's a world I'd like to manifest, to call into being, even in a small way. Even if it's just a story.

[veryace-ficrecs]

Tim Drake & Jason Todd Angst Fic Recs

This list will include all ratings and tags, so read at your own discretion! :)

in the planter outside my front door by CosmoKid - Rated G

When Tim’s six years old, his third-grade class takes a field trip to the old firehouse in The Narrows.

By the age of seven years old, he’s learned that there’s a difference between pain and Pain, and that while adults are generally happy to deal with pain, they do not enjoy you talking about Pain.

These two things may be related.

This Dark Ceiling Without a Star by Miss_Lazy_Tuesday - Rated M

“For fuck’s sake, your chatter is going to drive me crazy faster than this stupid spell.” “Then you talk!” “There’s no point!” Jason snaps. “I can feel it, okay. It’s—there’s no emotion behind it, it’s not using my thoughts. It’s just a bunch of weird Greek echoing in my brain and a compulsion to act. And it’s getting stronger. Talking isn’t going to slow it down.” “Then what will slow it down?” After five long seconds of silence, Tim gives into the urge and viciously jabs his fist into Jason’s leg for the second time. “Goddammit, why?” Jason snaps, green briefly sparking in his eyes before disappearing just as quickly. “You are not seriously going to just sit there and wait to die.” “The hell do you care anyway?” “Because I don’t want you to die! Obviously!” “You fucking should.” 

unaware i'm tearing you asunder by hendecagrisms - Rated T

The pieces were starting to click into place, aligning to create a deeply disturbing picture. “Are you seriously saying you’ll become a missing person and fake your death for this stupid homecoming plan?” Jason interrupted, his voice full of as much judgmental incredulity as possible. The kid’s eyes skated back over to him, his face twitching into a brief frown. “What? No.” A pause. “I mean, we could do that instead, if you wanted. But to fool Batman I’d need facial reconstruction surgery and new papers and it would all have to be untraceable—,” he broke off with a scoff, shaking his head slightly. “No, it’s just smarter and more cost-efficient to do it for real.” - Tim learns about Jason Todd's return, does some research on the Lazarus Pit, and realizes that there might be a way to solve multiple problems all at once: removing himself from the picture. For some strange reason, the Red Hood doesn't seem keen on cooperating.

Grin and Bear It (I got blood on your carpet) by Alia_JuneBug - Not Rated

When Jack Drake’s business trip gets canceled, he is forced to stay at home while the legal kinks get worked out. He’s not used to having a teenager underfoot, so it’s only rational that he’s a little snappish around Tim. At least, that’s what Tim tells himself each time his dad’s idea of discipline gets harsher. Bruce had told him to take a break from Robin in order to spend some time at home with his dad, and Tim can’t say no to that. He knows Bruce is probably glad to be rid of him for a short while. And he can handle discipline. This is a Tim Drake problem, not a Robin problem anyway. There’s no need for Bruce to know anything. Things get a little muddled when an injured Jason Todd crawls through his bedroom window.

Thrown into the Storm by ThePokeOne - Rated T

"It figured, Tim thought as he trekked through Gotham's streets in one of the worst storms he'd ever seen. He'd been careless. So stupidly careless."

Or:

Tim gets kicked out, and Jason has a change of plans.

am i the only one pretending (i did it to myself) by rutaceae - Rated T

Tim doesn’t expect his latest civilian kidnapping to be any different from the rest, but when he remembers things best left buried in the past, things take a turn for the worse. Luckily, his family is here to help.

sallow skin (and they can’t look away) by Ghxst_Bird - Rated T

Bruce is off planet when Robin’s distress beacon is lit. He tries not to worry, but then Nightwing contacts him: Robin’s tracker leads straight into Gotham Bay.

1-800-ROBIN by spqr - Rated T

“Gotham Youth Mental Health Hotline, this is Jason speaking. Can I ask who I’m talking to?” There’s a long silence on the other end of the line, and then a small voice says, “I, um. Sorry, I don’t know why I called. This was a mistake. I’ll just hang up now.” “Hey, wait.” Jason drops his feet to the floor, sitting forward in his shitty cubicle. Suddenly his heart is racing and he’s not sure why, but he can’t let this kid hang up. “You don’t have to tell me your name. That’s okay. Just – why don’t you tell me why you’re calling?”

buy the ticket, take the ride by Anonymous - Rated M

Tim had always figured that if he ever woke up in Vegas sans-memory, it would be when he was older than fourteen. But there were some things he couldn’t control, and apparently whatever had happened last night that he didn’t remember was one of them.

hungry for strays by Ghxst_Bird - Rated T

Tim knows something is wrong with Batman and Nightwing, and somehow it all has to do with the new crime lord on the rise in crime alley. So of course he’s not going to stay at the manor while they’re out risking their lives. Tim leaves a note and sets out for intel on the Red Hood. Aka. Everyone is straight up not having a good time

Safe and Warm by sardonic_sprite - Rated G

Batman.

Batman lived right next door. Batman surely had a generator, or at least a fireplace and wood, or some way to get warm.

Batman took care of kids, and Mr. Wayne was really nice. He would at least let Tim warm himself back up. Maybe he could even stay just until the power came back on.

It was worth a shot.

Nervous Breakdown by AhsokaJackson - Rated T

Jay closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose to push back the encroaching headache. And possibly the admittedly ironic desire to strangle this kid for his lack of self-care instincts. "Tim. Timmy. Answer me this. Where exactly is the old man? Actually, better question: Why in the ever-living hell is the answer to that anything other than 'right here'?" Tim gave a huff that sounded more tired than defiant. "Because, like I said, it's a mild case and I don't need to be under observation. I already told Bruce the same thing I told you: I'm fine." "And he believed that."

Don't You Know? by sardonic_sprite - Rated T

“How the hell did you think taking everything the real Robin had was going to make him proud of you?” Jason snapped. “I didn’t want to take anything,” Replacement cried. “I wanted to save it. It… Batman… they were… everything was just… It was awful, and, and Gotham needed… but Robin…” The kid looked up at Jason, desperation in his eyes, like he was trying to find justification from his accuser. “I-I know he wouldn’t have wanted Batman to die.”

Living Dead Boy by Terranpheum - Rated T

Tim was having a normal night photographing Batman and mourning the dead when Jason Todd suddenly breaks out of his own grave. He's unresponsive and catatonic, and Tim knows there's no way he can leave the boy on his own. So, he brings him back to Drake Manor to try and help him recover. It goes… well?

Instead of All the Colors That I Saw by SilverSkiesAtMidnight - Rated T

Dick comes around to stand fully in front of him, keeping a steadying hand on Tim’s arm. “Just because you know you’re safe intellectually doesn’t mean you always feel safe,” he says softly. “It’s okay if you don’t feel safe.” “But it’s not okay!” Tim bursts out. “Because if I don’t feel safe, then how is Jason supposed to feel safe? He shouldn’t have to feel uncomfortable just because my brain is screwed up!” There’s a faint sound by the door, barely more than an intake of breath, and his eyes snap to the no-longer empty doorway.

The Worst Kind of Crush by TimDrakeIsMyPatronus - Rated T

Civilians came first.  It was one of the foundational truths of being a superhero. Their job was to save civilians regardless of the personal cost. Each of them knew and understood the risks associated with the cape when they put it on.  Still, rules got fuzzy when one woke up underneath a building.  Or the one where a building explodes and Tim is trapped under the rubble

Last Request by destiny919 - Rated T

"Any last words, Replacement?" Red Hood casually crouches down in front of him. "Or how about a last request? I'm feeling generous. I'll do you one last favor before I clip those little wings. Whatever you want. Sky's the limit." There's only one thing he's ever really wanted from Jason Todd.

Echoes of You by SilverSkiesAtMidnight - Rated T

Graveyard mud, heavy and dark, clinging to a stained and torn suit. One shoe missing, a leg bent awkwardly and blood staining a bare foot.

Milk white skin beneath the mud, black hair hanging in muddy clumps around his ears. Blue eyes staring back at him, animal-bright and dilated in the brief moment before he flinches back from the light with a cry of pain that stabs through Jason to the soul.

His shaking hand closes around the flashlight before he can even think about it, cutting off the piercing beam and letting it spill out in shards between his fingers. For a petrifying moment as his eyes readjust, he’s sure that when he looks again, there will be nothing there.

“Tim?” he whispers.

The lean and ragged figure, tiny, god he’s so small, lowers his hands away from his face, away from his eyes wide and glittering almost silver in the moonlight.

Hands, mud-covered and torn. The red of his shredded fingernails is sickeningly dark in the broken light.

He’s vomiting before he even feels the bile making its way up his throat.

Petals for Armor by SilverSkiesAtMidnight - Rated T

There’s a small half-moon of blood under the white of Tim’s nail where he bent it. He studies the red of it, feeling foggy and dreamlike. “Can I ask you a question?” His brother’s eyes flick to him and away again, surprised and wary. “What?” His nail doesn’t hurt much, just the dullest of aches when he presses down against it. “When you were homeless, you slept with people for money, didn’t you?” Jason jerks like he’s been slapped. His knuckles are so pale where they grip the steering wheel they suddenly look more bone than flesh. ���Did I -” “Was it worth it?” Tim asks, drifting like a cloud over whatever furious reaction Jason was about to give him. “The money, I mean.” His sternum slams into the seatbelt with bruising force. Unbraced for it, his head whips forward and back against his seat as they swerve off the road again and skid to a halt with a screech of rubber.

farthest you’ve ever flown by rutaceae - Rated T

When Jack Drake kicks Tim out in a rage, Tim, not wanting to be a bother, tries to make it work without getting the Bats involved. But he can only go so long without being found out, and it’s not Batman that ends up discovering his secret; it’s the Red Hood.

Familial Ties by AnonymousWhump - Rated T

What he wasn't expecting was to walk into the kitchen to find Tim,  yes Tim because he wasn't in the Robin outfit he was dressed in a hoodie and sweatpants, was that blood on his feet?  Staring at him in shock, eyes flicking from him to the phone in his hand, before mumbling a quiet,

“Jason?”  

Or, Jason breaks into the Titan's Tower to hurt Robin but his plan is quickly derailed when he sees signs of abuse.

Drop In by iselsis - Rated T

Tim's injured, alone in Crime Alley, and the worst possible person finds him. And yet it doesn't turn out as badly as Tim expected.

Watch Your Step Dear by Redaliveviolation - Rated T

Tim was having a great time watching the Dynamic Duo race across Gotham. He was getting so many good photos and he never wanted these nights to end. Too bad the heroes aren’t around when he takes a trip off of the side of a building.

[femmefatalevibe]

Femme Fatale Guide: How To Cultivate Self-Love & Boost Self-Esteem

Acknowledging these two truths is essential: 

You have inherent worth. No one can deprive or deplete you of this value – except yourself. 

Only you can be the hero of your own life. It's no one's obligation to be your personal cheerleader – except you. 

Understanding that only you are responsible and able to generate your sense of happiness and fulfillment sets you free. 

How To Practice Self-Love: 

Discover and live by your values: Unapologetically! Some of the best advice I ever got when I was in high school (the OG Tumblr era lol) was this sentiment that I still live by: It’s important to live your life with respect and consideration for others but to never live for others. Your life is for YOU, not THEM. Remember: Self-neglect has a domino effect. You don't know how to provide others with the proper emotional space and validation until you first give it yourself. 

Find what gives you energy: What activities, habits, and people in your life help you feel alive and most connected? Lean into these routines. Make it a priority to spend time with these valuable people who earned a place in your inner circle. Give yourself the gift of ease whenever possible. Life is hard enough just by virtue of existing and having to engage with society daily. 

How To Build Self-Esteem: 

Gain confidence in your areas of mastery: Affirm your strengths. These can be character traits, skillsets, accomplishments, etc. Any truths about your personality and achievements that you can use to hype yourself up. While being delusional has its place when setting goals, I’ve found it easier to internalize naturally healthy levels of confidence and self-esteem when I can back it up with facts or experiences grounded in reality. 

Perceive your past mistakes as life lessons: Understand that every decision can serve as a data point. Every action has a certain outcome – whether that’s positive or negative. Seek to understand how your behavior, actions, and reactions shaped either outcome. Lean into the patterns that created positive results and adjust those that led to negative results when encountering similar situations in the future. 

Release the desire for revenge: Stop giving away your power to others. Stay in your own lane, unbothered. The ultimate revenge is personal success and fulfillment. 

Acknowledge what’s outside of your control: Don’t internalize outcomes that occurred due to external factors outside of your control. Other people’s actions, reactions, mannerisms, criticisms, and praise are most often (if not always) a reflection of how they perceive themselves. Detach yourself from the outcome or approval of others. Once you gain an understanding of yourself, your values, how you want to show up in the world, and ways to feel secure in your own skin, it's easier to stay objective when dealing with a high-stakes situation, conversation, or conflict. Once you cultivate a sense of self-respect and integrity, you can be objective and have the energy to listen to and validate others as needed. 

Focus on your goals and priorities: Remain laser focused on achieving your career, personal growth, health, relational, and other life goals. Make your fundamental habits and most valuable relationships in your life your utmost priority. Everything else is an outside indulgence or distraction. Choose to give into your temptations wisely. Prioritize your life to ensure you make room for pleasure, love, abundance, and joy. You have the ability to give to others freely once you’ve already filled up your own cup. 

Remember everything takes time and experience: No one has it all figured out. It’s okay if you’re not where you expected to be or desire to be at this stage of your life. Stop comparing yourself – we all have our own paths. Choose to do one small thing every day to make your life better – either a step towards reaching a goal or indulging in a deep desire. Ensure there's a healthy (not necessarily equal) balance between the two. Leave your future self better than you found your past self. Express compassion towards yourself and acknowledge that you’re doing your best. Everything starts to make considerably more sense in hindsight. 

[miquellaluciscaelum]

Apparently publishing posts is like a form of therapy for me and a way to deal with the emotions from the dlc.

The topic of Miquella in no way leaves me, it literally rents free in my mind 24/7 and I keep going through all the options, trying to find some meanings hidden and not, and come to terms with what we got.

It would certainly be a lot easier if people weren't screaming from every corner about how Miquella is evil, Griffith, "it was clear from the beginning", "justice, apologies for Mogh and Radanh" and all of that.

I think it would make me feel better in a way if I spell out how I feel about Miquella, his plot, and the denouement. The first thought is, of course, disappointment. And it is still significantly present. It is difficult to describe in a short and concise way what exactly I am not satisfied with, so I will write what I missed and what I would have preferred to see instead of what we got.

✨Miquella is essentially a central figure in the story and narrative, but there is very little content directly related to him. In the main game we had that one direct phrase (presumably) from him in the description of the Golden Epitaph, a sword that again (presumably) was created by him and got his Unalloyed gold needle but that was the main game. In the DLC, he's literally the plot, the driver of all events, the main mystery we've come to solve. And he wasn't enough. We have his crosses plastered all over the map that give us phrases about renouncing the flesh, but it's literally the same sentence repeated in different ways. It doesn't give any lore other than that Miquella is renouncing himself for the sake of divinity. There's not much to investigate. It would have been enough to add at least one more sentence each slightly more revealing of Miquella's inner world and his feelings as he cuts off parts of himself somewhere on the edge of the world with an unknown future looming ahead. Something along the lines of "Here I renounce my flesh and blood. My heritage that has always weighed on my shoulders and the sins that have stained my soul." or "Here I renounce my heart. The love for those who have been forgotten and abandoned is still hidden deep within." Or add some dungees, maybe at least one legacy dungeon, like a castle or a fort, centered on Miquella, with a boss at the end that would add lore to it. The only bosses we get lore about him from are Radann and Saint Trina with her boss and I'm not happy with that.

✨I also generally missed the interaction between the Shadow world and Miquella. In terms of the fact, outside of interacting with NPCs, that are related to Miquella, his presence in the world is absolutely not felt. This applies to literally everything. Some of his crosses are located in plot significant locations with other bosses or npcs, that are not related to the main plot, but are related to the Shadow world, and Miquella softly speaking very much affects the Shadow world with his presence, but there is no mention of him. The only one I immediately can remember who mentions him is Count Ymir. This doesn't mean I demand that the whole story and world focus on him, but in terms of depth of immersion and elaboration of the world it breaks the unity of the setting, as if everything that happens is two parallel universes.

✨The denouement itself is not satisfying. The game does not treat Miquella as a full-fledged antagonist (as it is with Radagon, Radanh, Rykard or any other boss in the main game), giving us a bossfight with him, where a unique atmosphere of the character would be created, his lore would be given due credit and most importantly - THERE WOULD BE A CLEAR REASON WHY WE ARE FIGHTING HIM. We literally do not even get rune for Elden ring from Miquella, what is there to talk about.

And game also doesn't make him a "friendly" ally - companion - nps like Melina or Ranni, giving the player no choice or variation at all in the terms of ending. Apparently there was supposed to be another ending along the lines of Ranni's ending, given Miquella's vow in the cut content, but for some reason that was cut. What's the point of it? Miquella's story would have been much better told in quest form, where we could talk to him as a companion, have direct dialog. What we have in the game is not a quest, but an exploration of the world with an extra lore mystery to boot.

✨I don't like the way the game deals with facts. And there are two main reasons for that. First, the game has almost no appeal to facts from the main game. If it was announced that dlc game was about some original characters in the world of elden ring, that's one thing. There would have been new lore introduced about the new characters that would not conflict with the lore of the main game, but complement it. But a character with an already written and fairly elaborate lore from the main game was taken as the basis, whose story is framed within it. And when for the entire game there are no references at all to that lore, fundamental to the character, and the new lore, conflicts with much of what was in the main game, that well, doesn't speak well of the game. It's not even about Malenia or Godwynn. I could also mention the mystery of Miquella's blood, the events of the Shattering, his beef with Outer gods, the connection to Ranni and Melina through the ring and summoning bell.

And second, the game is very noticeably vaguely ambiguous. Especially in key events that define our point of view of the character. I can directly see Miyazaki asking the writers to make all the events so murky and full of white holes that the community just fights each other over lore. Like they say if you want to piss someone off in Souls fandom, tell them they got the plot wrong and you'll never hear the end of it. There's a very simple example with Mogh. We get it, yes, he's the main poor battered boy who no one loved, everyone used him. He just built something of his own, his cute little bloody cult, kidnapping people and glorifying pain, wounds and offering bloody sacrifices to a very peaceful harmless outer god, you get the picture. Miquella came in, bewitched everyone, ruined everything, and seems apparently made Tarnished to kill Mogh too. He took full advantage of the situation. But then what about the kidnapping? Didn't we literally see the place where Miquella's body was ripped from in the Haligtree? Or are you saying that Miquella, who had long planned to merge with the tree, grow it with his blood, did so, spent some time in the tree (his own wooden body literally had time to form there) and suddenly changed his mind. By telepathic communication made Mogh come and steal him? How does that even work? Or the Shapeless Mother? Was she on her lunch break while Miquella was bewitching her darling son and his entire flock? How on earth could Miquella have such a strong influence on someone who was already under the influence of an outer god? What about Radan? Was the oath mutual? Was it an oath at all, rather than a naive child promise that later turned into a commitment? The original Japanese text of Miquella's memory gives a very strange and potentially unhealthy context to this whole pact between them? I'm not asking Miyazaki to write me a hundred-page essay explaining the plot and character motivations, but this ambiguity that generates a huge amount of speculation and debate is not personally appealing to me.

✨Saint Trina is conceptually very controversial to me. I never liked the Marika/Radagon allegory in the context of Miquella, and when it started to be theorized that Trina like Radagon could be a more antagonistic part of Miquella, opposing him in his plans, well.... I've always been more sympathetic to the idea that she was just another guise of Miquella, more of a disguise than a separate entity. In the context of the dlc, I don't see her as anything other than a remnant of kindness, love, and spirit of Miquella gaining a body and asking us to "fix" his mistakes. This for me falls in line with our motivation. We fight Miquella because he himself asked us to kill him because at some point he realized he was on the wrong path but already couldn't stop. Let me believe in something good please(

✨The whole "the road to hell is paved with good intentions" plot. Honestly I expected more. It was the most obvious  way to develop the story far ago, when Miquella was compared to Griffith before the game came out, and now that we have the final product in front of us, it looks even more cheap and second-rate. I realize that Miyazaki is apparently allergic to happiness, hope, and good endings, but he could have come up with something better. What to say, Honkai Star Rail update came out a couple months ago where a neutral-positive character with a desire for a better world at the end turned out to be an antagonist who wanted to plunge everyone into eternal dreams to save them from the pain and hopelessness of the real world🤣 Not a popular plot at all. Endless Tsukiyomi was invented a couple decades ago, it's time to move on.

I won't say it's bad writing, but honestly, I don't compare the end of the dlc and Miquella's plot to anything other than the ending of Attack of Titans and Eren Yeager or S8 Game of Thrones and Daenerys. And such comparisons don't mean anything good.

I agree that the plot adds depth to Miquella's character, through self-denial, through comparisons to Marika, etc. But this should not be done at the expense of alienating its core lore. I can recognize some merit in such a plot, but it's a situation where you as a fan just simply has no choice, where you choose the lesser of two evils between just completely deny the whole plot or adapt it and flip for myself, but actually whatever you choose you still choose evil in the end. Miquella's plot is like making all the wrong choices. And you realize how you got here and accept it, but you can't help but regret the lost potential of other paths.

Please, if you've already played the game and have thoughts different from mine, especially backed up by specific facts from dlc, I'd love to hear them. I haven't gotten through dlc yet, I'm having a very hard time morally overcoming my disappointment in it, and I'm clearly still somewhere in the denial-bargaining stage.

[sp00kymulderr]

part 3 - Afterburn

series masterlist

Pairing: Joel Miller x afab reader (no pronouns)

Warnings: 18+, cursing, details of grief, survivors guilt, dealing with emotions badly, reader is dealing with death of a loved one, general sadness, kissing, m masturbation, premature ejaculation, oral (f receiving), fingering (f receiving). Please let me know if I missed any.

Word Count: 5.6k

Summary: “Do you remember what it’s like to be happy?”

A/N: I'm sorry it's taken so long to post. I'm really proud of this one. If you like it please please comment and/or reblog. To follow for fic updates only go to @sp00kyupdates​ or see taglist details on my masterlist. Credit to banner/divider maker.

Joel is not the same after you return from your short shower. Your packs are waiting for you at the bottom of the stairs as he stands by the door scanning the horizon, an impatient tut leaves him.

“We gotta go, you ready?” He grunts, not even bothering to look at you.

“Joel c’mon…” You respond, your voice a little hoarse.

“Just-” Joel snaps and then sighs, finishing the rest of the sentence in a slightly softer tone “Grab your stuff. Put on your boots”

He shoulders his pack and walks out the door, waiting on the porch. You mutter your frustration. He isn’t being fair and you’re pretty sure he knows it too. You want to understand why this is such a bad thing - the two of you - but he doesn’t seem to want to even acknowledge what happened.

You sit on the sagging couch and look once more around the old house. It’s always difficult to come to these places, but somehow it’s also difficult to leave them. Someone lived here, someone loved here, someone was happy here once – you hope at least. You look around the dusty living room once more and contemplate, as you always do. What has this place seen, what kind of people called it a home? What secrets does it keep?

Those thoughts bring you to your own home too, where you’d been until the outbreak. You’d never gone back but you’d often thought of returning, seeing if anything of your old life still existed. Since you’d lost your last connection to your past.

You shake your head and pull on the new boots lacing them tight, ready to put them to the test at least. Joel is waiting for you outside when you finally make your way to him and he’s already walking, apparently sure of the direction.

You follow in silence for a while. Your feet don’t hurt as bad as before and you’re grateful for that.

“Did you ever go home, Joel?” You ask eventually, hesitant.

“Huh?” he’s only half listening to you, looking around for any signs of imminent threat.

“You ever go back to your old home?”

“No” is all he says.

You leave it at that.

The last thing Joel wants to think about is home. Home is where his broken heart is. He’d never go back there, he’d pull the memory completely from his head if he could. 

There’s a lot of memories he wishes he didn’t have to have.

And now he has a new one; his head feels so all over the place because of you and your lips, your warmth, the disquieting solace he found in you. He knows he shouldn’t punish you for any of it; for what happened, for how he feels, for how he doesn’t understand his feelings. But he’s already punishing himself for everything else that’s ever happened, so you’ll have to take the brunt of this mistake.

And it was a mistake, he knows that. You don’t want him the way you think you do. He’s sure of it. It’s not about anything more than forgetting for you, for finding some distraction from your pain. He knows it too well. He’s been there. He’s still there in a way but at least after all these years he knows better than to chase that feeling. He has to keep away, help you know better too.

“Keep up” He mutters as he looks back at you, and he knows he sounds harsh but he can’t stop himself.

That deceitful monster in him wants more. He feels it. He won’t give in to it.

When you were younger you used to run free and happy in the green garden outside your house. You would spend all your time outside, climbing trees, scaling rocks, swimming in the lake by the forest. You had a treehouse in the garden and you'd climb up to it every summer night and watch the world from up there, free and happy and something more.

Alive in more ways than just surviving.

She'd been with you even then, you'd share secrets and tell stories cuddled up in your sleeping bags in the treehouse at night together. You lived for those moments when you and your best friend would live in your own world and everything else was just background noise.

Now you're climbing trees and scaling rocks but not for the same reasons the innocent child of your past would. You have to scope out the land, find a good place to stop. Joel helps boost you up to a branch so you can climb, to check out some noise in the distance of the forest, and when you snag your shirt on a twig you have this pang of gut-wrenching muscle memory of that time she fell from the treehouse and you thought for a moment of blind panic that you'd lost her.

You hate that every single thing reminds you of her. You despise the memories for making you misty eyed and weak. The more Joel ignores you as the time goes on, the worse it gets. The more you remember, the more everything reminds you of your dead best friend and the lives you'd lost to this world of horrors. Your life next, you know. That’s all there is now.

Just you.

And Joel. 

Joel, who was pulling away more and more with every passing second. His hesitant gaze on you lands regretful and forlorn.

Eventually up in the tree you're able to see far enough to know there's a camp of people further down the forest, so when you’re back down Joel decides on a detour that leads you both far in the opposite direction not wanting to take any risks. Your new boots are finally starting to rub after hours and hours of walking - nothing good lasts forever. You wonder if the person they belonged to before you ever got to wear them, if you shared the pain of blisters from the same shoes. If the people in that house used to go hiking in this vast forest every weekend. You wonder if they are dead now too, or just trying desperately to survive. Are they trying to make it back to their home, to find the memories they’d left behind?

You'd go home. You would. If you ever could. It's too far now, too dangerous and too much to ever think you could make it there. Besides, what would you do when you got there? Hope you had anything of yours left? Let yourself drown in the pain of distant memories, of things you knew you’d never get back? But there were things, all these trinkets you wanted to hold to your heart now you have nothing else. Photos; pictures printed and framed or posted on your walls with sticky tack since you were a teenager. Family and friends and pets and all the things you have lost. The things you’d never, ever get back.

The silence consumes you and you think you’d rather wallow in your grief and misery back at the place where you were once happy, instead of being here where your longing and guilt are driving you to insanity with every ticking second. You miss talking, you miss having a friend. She was everything you ever needed in life, she was the only thing that had made you happy in the years since the world ended. You need that, and you know Joel won’t give you any of the things you need. He doesn’t want to know you any more than he has now. You can’t see past his actions back at the house and he can’t see you in any way other than shamefully anymore.

You don’t even know what to say to him now. So you just walk, and ignore the aching and misery consuming you whole.

It’s a few hours later and your feet are starting to bleed through your socks, because all good things must come to an end in this empty horror of a world. Joel finally decides it’s time to stop and make camp. It’s getting dark after all and there’s the opportunity for cover while you’re still under the protection of the vast forest - you’re nearly at the edge now. 

“This should work” he mutters more to himself than you as he looks over the spot you’ve stopped at.

He briefly glances at you and it’s nothing but it’s more than he’s given you in hours so it makes you feel a little glint of that spark from before again. What if you just kissed him again, the way he let you before? Would he stop you? You know he likely would, but it doesn’t stop you wanting to try.

Like he knows, he’s stepping further from you acting like he’s inspecting the site he’s picked. There’s nothing to inspect - it’s a patch of mossy forest floor with a large rock on one side and what looks like an ancient tree on the other. You watch him momentarily and feel that misery all over. Touch would solve it all. His touch would solve everything just like it did before. The darkness above the trees could hold a secret if he could just give you something, a tiny thing to keep your sadness at bay.

And yet you are both wordless as you set up the small camp; no fire - that would potentially draw attention and the woods are never an entirely safe place to be - just your sleeping bags set up with an arm's length between the two like he’s worried you’ll somehow get the wrong idea if he gives you even the possibility of touching him again.

“Here” He mutters when you’re both sitting down and you almost laugh with the ridiculousness of how hard he’s trying to not even give you his gaze anymore. He hands you some of the jerky that’s been wrapped in his pack for a while. It’s dry and hard.

“We got all that stuff from the house” 

“Gonna split it, when we…” He mutters without finishing his sentence.

“Oh”

When we go our separate ways. That’s what he meant and he doesn’t have to say it. He’s gonna leave you. Leave you completely alone.

“You know where you’re gonna go?” Joel asks and maybe there’s the hint of guilt in his voice but more likely you’re imagining it.

Tears prick hot in your eyes and you try to blink them away. All this time you’d done so well at not letting him see you cry; the tears from your loss and your grief had only once fallen in his sight and now you were feeling them fall down your cheeks right in front of him all because he was finally sending you on your way.

Stupid. You’re so stupid. It was only ever temporary and he’d made it so clear he didn’t want anything from you. He was just doing a sad, lost person a momentary favor but you’d lost sight of that completely after these last couple days. The way he had kissed you…the way you know it would’ve gone further yesterday if there hadn’t been an interruption…but none of it means a thing in the wake of his words.

He’s looking at you now. Of course this would be the moment he finally decides to turn those beautiful eyes back on you - you can feel the weight of his gaze on your face and you want it to be dark and lustful like before but when you look over at him he’s frowning. You sniffle and clear your throat, and finally give him an answer.

“I- I want to go home” You say so sadly and his brow knits in confusion for a moment before he understands.

“You think that’s a good idea?” Joel sounds more judgemental than he probably means to. He’s still watching you, but he never addresses the tears that are silently falling from your sad eyes.

You shake your head and sigh. Chewing on the last of the jerky for a bit and it makes you feel sick. His gaze burns you now, like it’s melting through the cold of him ignoring you all day and scorching at your flesh. Why won’t he stop staring? Why suddenly is he so intent on giving you all this attention? Does he just pity you that much?

He’s still eating slowly when you lie down on your sleeping bag, staring up at the trees and the night sky just above them. You’d spent nights like this watching the stars before - your heart pangs at the memory and you feel bile rise up in your throat for a moment before you screw your eyes shut tight enough to see the dance of colourful light behind your lids.

“Do you remember what it’s like to be happy?” Your voice is a whisper, it shakes as you shove that memory back down.

You open your eyes and turn your head in time to see Joel's sudden pained look and the shake of his head. You can feel the misery around him like it’s an aura. That only makes your heart hurt more. Damn it, why does he have to make you feel more? It’s always those eyes; he can make himself as hard and distant as he wants but his beautiful brown eyes betray him every single time

“Yeah. Well, I do. I remember. I remember living” If it wasn’t clear you were crying before it’s obvious you are now, you sniffle and wipe tears that race from the corners of your eyes into your hair.

Joel remains quiet for a while after that. Perhaps he just doesn’t know what to say, or perhaps he’s trying not to comfort you. The trees above the two of you wave gently in a breeze that rushes quietly through the forest, and the stars above them shine like they always have - unchanged by the death of this world and the screaming of your souls. Between you and Joel there is a blanket of grief and despair and both of you seem to be wrapping yourselves tighter in it at every turn.

Eventually he clears his throat and there’s a slight shift in Joel’s body, angling more towards you. It makes you bolder - like before - and you reach your hand between your two sleeping bags. Just lay it there between the two of you.

“I don’t want to remember, Joel. Not right now. I just want to feel something else” 

He rubs his watering eyes and sighs deeply. He is wavering, you can tell. He’s holding back but there’s the twitch of his hands as he looks at you lying there and he slowly reaches out - rough, calloused and warm hand encompassing yours slowly. He lets out a long breath.

“It’s not gonna help. I- I’m not gonna help you like you need. Nothing’s that simple. I should know…”

“You’re scared”

“Maybe” Joel shrugs. 

His hand holds yours a little tighter. You’re still crying silent tears that glisten on your face in the starlight.

“Don’t you feel alone? Don’t you just feel so fucking alone all the time? Why do we have to feel alone, when we’re here together?” You’re actually pleading now. It’s pathetic really but you just need the incessant heartache to stop for even a moment.

Joel hums low and gives you a long stare. His eyes soften more. There’s a shred more sympathy than there has been and it’s enough for your body to ignite with that burning hope just like last time.

“Fuck” He mutters, and then “Come here” and he is letting go of your hand and laying on his side on the sleeping bag, it seems reluctant but he’s inviting you to him and you’re almost embarrassed when you move in a heartbeat and close that gap between you and him.

Your breath catches when you lie beside him on your side and his body curls around yours, his arm over you and he holds your hand again. He’s warm like a comforting blanket - it feels almost like he’s protecting you the way he holds you close. It’s the closest you’ve ever been; even when he’d kissed you, when he’d touched you he’d kept a distance. You had never gotten to feel all of his body against you like this. Only in your hopeless dreaming. His breath tickles on the back of your neck and the warmth of it lingers, his heart beating steady where his chest presses against your back. He lets out a nearly silent sigh that makes you think he’s feeling the same thing as you. 

You are not alone.

For a while it’s nothing, and Joel starts to think you’re sleeping. Your breathing is steady just like his and those sweet little sighs could just be the slumber taking hold. You don’t move and he’s so afraid to make even the slightest change to the position lest he starts you on that downward spiral again.

He knows it’s a mistake. Such a big mistake to let you feel close to him. It is only going to make everything worse in the long run but your words ring so true in his mind - he has been so damn alone. Ever since…for too long. He’s been alone. You draw him in like a magnet; a strange and shameful comfort that he’s denied himself all these years.

Maybe it’ll be fine. Maybe it’ll just be this, nothing more and nothing less. No guilt. No attachment. Maybe you’ll leave willingly and he’ll never once think about this moment again and neither will you. Maybe. 

He murmurs your name softly and buries his face against your neck. He just wants to feel. Something. It’s wrong. He’s leading you on. But he wants to escape his loneliness just as much as you want to escape your pain.

He hears the smallest moan escape you like a breath and it makes him tighten his arm around you a little, because it brings him back to what happened before. How he’d touched you, how he’d felt you. There’s a stirring in him at the memory. You both feel it.

Joel knows you’re not asleep now, your breathing is less steady and your hand squeezes his a little.

“Don’t let me feel alone” You murmur and fuck Joel wants to let that base part of himself take control all over again.

He hesitates but only for a second. 

“I won’t”

And then he’s turning your head, and he’s kissing you.

There’s a moment of guilt that rises from your chest slowly, but it’s gone again the moment your lips meet his.

It's not like the first kiss. It's not even like the kisses in the kitchen when he'd pressed you up against the fridge and touched you. It's not like any kiss you've ever felt; it's urgent and desperate but not forceful or rough - there's a subtle tenderness behind it like he's really genuinely trying to give you that feeling of togetherness you crave so much.

It makes your mind go blank after a moment, when you feel his tongue and he’s asking for a permission which you grant without a moment of hesitation. It makes you forget where you are, who you are, what you've been through. 

He's good at that. Making you forget.

He's good at it all.

He kisses you harder when you open your mouth to him and it turns from tender to intense. It becomes more. More and more of him and you and it's what you've thought about all day. Like he really wants you. You're still on your side with your head turned and him over you, your back pressed against his chest and his subtle shift of hips against your ass makes your breath hitch. 

Oh, he wants you. And you want him. 

And what else matters?

“Joel…” you whimper. Sickly sweet and full of urgency. 

“Yeah, I know,” He says. 

There’s something else there, something you don’t want to hear. Something he doesn’t want to share. He shakes it away in a moment of a blink. He’s well versed in brushing away those moments. You need to learn it from him.

“I know” He says again, and he kisses you once more. Your lips lock in a moment that fans the flames that have been burning all this time; these weeks the two of you have been traveling together, these moments you have been sharing that are more than just moments. He stokes the coals of your desire with his mouth on yours and then down, down. To your cheek, your jaw, he’s over you and pressing you on to your back half on the cold ground as his lips meet your neck and you keen in some kind of desperation to be alight with his touch again.

Your hands traverse the broad expanse of his chest, clinging to the rough fabric of his shirt as he kisses the spot right under your ear that makes your soul leave you for a moment.

“You won’t stop this time?” You ponder, looking for a promise

“No”.

Simple, straight. Joel. He needs it. You know it’s been a while, you can tell by the way his hot mouth latches on to your soft flesh as he ruts against you like he’s already chasing a release he’s waited too long for.

“Doesn’t mean anythin’, right?”

“Doesn’t mean anything,” you repeat. 

He means it. Do you?

“Fuck” He groans, deep and guttural when your wandering hands reach lower. It’s all so urgent. There’s no moment for softness. It’s lustful and intentional and greedy. Teeth and nails and need. No moment to waste as your nimble fingers find the opening of his faded jeans and make their way inside.

He’s still exploring with demanding grunts of appreciation at the taste of your skin. He’d liked it before. He likes it more now, after the long day of toil. You’re intoxicating in all the ways he never knew how to resist.

You think he feels the same as you. It’s been so long. You can’t remember the last time you felt such intimate touch, before Joel. It’s more addicting now than it ever was back then as his fingertips dance with burning brushes against the skin under your shirt.

There are no memories. No pain. No distant threat. No trees. No breeze. No stars. Just him and you in this blank space you have created for yourselves - outside of time and reality. It is a kiss that takes away life, that takes away loneliness. His touch breathes hope into you that you’d only ever felt with…no. It’s just him and you and nothing else.

Just that.

Your fingers trace down, past where buttons are undone and the zipper is open. You touch him, a slight squeeze that makes his breath hitch so damn gorgeously you feel it in your core.

He’s big. God, he’s big and he’s hard and it’s for you. It’s for you.

He breathes out and grits his teeth as you feel him, he has to stop kissing you for a moment as you ease his pants down and free his hardened length from its confines. He’s not gonna tell you to stop. Neither of you are going to end this until it has to be ended, you know that when you look in his eyes and they are dazed with lust and desire that he’s been holding back for too long.

There’s no call for modesty here in this darkened patch of forest floor where the only sounds are the rustle of leaves and your panting breaths. He watches you with a knitted brow trying so goddamn hard to hold on to at least a bit of himself when you lewdly spit into your hand and wrap it around his thick length.

“Shit” Joel grits his teeth, pressing his forehead against your shoulder. He murmurs your name. It’s never sounded as good as it does when spoken by him like that. Your hand moves, thumb swiping his leaking tip to smear on him. He feels good in your hand, heavy and smooth and he’s already shaking.

“I…sweetheart, I can’t…”

“Yeah, you can” You shush him with your lips against his, oddly soft and caring in this moment of heady lust.

“No I mean it’s…fuck” Joel pants out, his voice a gruff whisper that tickles your skin and makes you clench “Haven’t had- I can’t fu-” words tumble from his lips to the side of your neck as he devolves into mumbles you can’t quite make out. He trembles and bites back a loud groan, before spilling warm and sticky onto your fingers.

“Sorry” He murmurs with heavy breath and it’s the sweetest fucking thing in the world from this man who has been pushing you away for what feels like eternity.

Ah, you make sense of the words now.

“Haven’t had anyone touch you in a while?” You say, biting your lip as you look at him - he takes your breath away as the moonlight catches on the glint of his eyes, the trickle of sweat down his brow. His eyes are big and brown and there’s an apology in them that you don’t need.

“It’s okay. It’s okay” You assure with a soft smile. You kiss him, a sweet peck on the lips which he returns with another. It feels almost too intimate and you know you’re falling to somewhere you can’t crawl out of.

For a beat there’s a silence; Joel zips his fly and is catching his breath after his release whilst you drag your lips from his and down to his chin then his jaw. Drowning in the scent and taste of him. He is like nothing you’ve ever known and you want to be devoured by his presence.

You’re making do with wiping your hand off on your trousers when he moves you, pressing you down on to your back fully. There’s a hunger in him. He is starved and he craves. You shiver at that; he can slip from one moment to another like a changeling. His demeanour seems to shift with the wind.

“Gonna make it up to you, darlin’” He whispers with a dark desire as he goes back to kissing your neck and his hand moves down your body and to the button of your pants. Your mind flashes back to before - the way he’d made you shake back in the house - and your cunt throbs with need for that again. For him to take away your mind and your breath and your sanity if he wants.

You need him in ways you cannot fathom.

“Oh god”  You moan as he cups you through your underwear, mouth still attacking the curve where your neck meets your shoulder. 

You’re ready to feel that way again. And you’re about to beg him not to tease you when he pulls his hand away and detaches from your neck.

“Joel” the whine is so needy you should be embarrassed but you’re not capable of feeling that at the moment.

He shushes you softly and finishes unfastening your jeans, as he kneels between your legs. And then he’s taking them off; your jeans and underwear pulled down to your ankles and off, tossed to the side. He’s a man on a mission, and he licks his lips as he nudges your legs apart further and looks down at you.

Fuck. You might come from the sight alone. God…is he going to…

Joels calloused hands slide up your thighs and to your lower stomach and he settles himself right between your spread legs. You can’t look at him down there like that.

“This okay?” He asks, holding on to your thigh with one large hand while the other slips up under your shirt to palm at your warm skin.

You have to let out a huffed laugh at that. It’s definitely okay. It’s more than okay.

“Mhm” You answer, lips pressed together and you look up at the stars instead of the beautiful man currently kissing your inner thigh. Before he had wanted nothing to do with you and now he seems to want everything with you, you’d have whiplash if your brain wasn’t slowly melting out of your ear at the feel of his lips dragging higher.

He’s taking it so. So slow. Palming your breast now and kissing the other thigh You’re going to combust and be left nothing but a pile of embers if he keeps this up. You need so deeply that it hurts.

You card your fingers through his hair. It’s surprisingly soft and the sensation adds to the tension in you. He grunts as you give a little tug, but you think he gets the message without you having to use your words, your words probably wouldn’t make sense in this moment.

“Oh!” you gasp. 

Yes, he proves that he got the message loud and clear as he’s parting you with his tongue and licking a stripe that ends at your clit and makes your eyes roll back. He’s good.

He tastes you and moans deep at it. His tongue swipes again against your clit and your grip in his hair tightens a bit again but he doesn’t seem to mind or even notice as he explores and delves deeper. He swirls against your entrance, and then presses in for a moment and you’re going to lose it completely.

The noise of your whines and whimpers increase, a muffled cry against your hand as he moves up again and sucks against your clit with a softness which quickly becomes much more fervent when you respond well. You buck your hips against his face, so he holds one strong arm across you as he continues to alternate between using his tongue and his mouth to bring you closer.

Your mind is all but scrambled with the way you feel. You haven’t had anything like this in so long and he’s fulfilling needs you had almost forgotten you had. He’s not just giving you pleasure, he’s giving you back something you thought you’d lost. He’s making you feel on fire in every way possible; burning skin on burning skin, scorching heat between your legs and deep in your belly.

You're winding, tightening, as he continues. He delves a thick finger in to you and then another as he focuses his mouth on your sensitive bud, listening to the sounds of your heavy breath and knowing he’s doing right.

“Joel…Joel you’re…yes, like that…” You moan too loud, Joel grunts against you with a light slap to the thigh. Keep it down. Even now he’s aware, does he ever really let himself go fully?

Right, you’re out in the open. It feels like you’re in a world of just you and him…you have to try and keep some kind of sanity as he makes you see the stars behind your lids. It’s almost impossible, biting your lip to try and quiet yourself.

It’s…it’s incredible. The way his tongue moves. The crook of his fingers inside you. The pressure in you when he purses his lips around your clit. Your body is too hot, alive, more alive than you’ve felt in weeks. Too alive, all at once.

“Oh god…I’m…it’s….please…” babbles of incoherence which earn you a pinch to your skin, but he doesn’t let up on his ministrations. He doesn’t give you a chance to calm down.

Suddenly, your body ignites as the tight coil in your stomach snaps and it’s like there’s no yesterday, no tomorrow. You writhe, hips bucking, Joel holding you down and continuing until the very last moment of your orgasm. You’ve come before, of course, even if not with a partner in a while you’ve known this feeling many times and yet it’s like something you’ve never fully had before. He’s like nothing you’ve ever experienced before.

Fuck, your eyes are shut tight as you ride out the waves. Little aftershocks that make your body shiver. You can feel him - a final kiss to your clit, another to your inner right thigh and then he’s raising up, moving away from you and you can hear him catching his own breath like he nearly drowned in you.

“Jesus” You groan, limp and a mess. He breathes out a quiet, pleased laugh and you finally open your eyes and try to adjust them to see his face again. 

He’s looking at you. He’s all lines and splotches and coloured lights but he’s looking at you with something like a smile. 

Everything is blurred.

The lines are blurred. What does it mean? What does that soft kiss he places against your lips now actually mean? You feel sluggish from the climax but somehow your mind is racing still despite it. The lines are so damn blurred and it’s going to make you crazy, it’s going to make you lose it all.

“Alright?” He asks softly as he helps you put on your underwear and jeans again. Where did all his uncaring gruffness go? When will it come back and how will you live when it does?

“y-yeah…I think…yeah” You mutter dumbly. “Joel, I-”

Whatever you were going to say is cut off. He lays beside you again, arm going right around you pulling you flush against his chest. Your heart won't stop racing.

“You still feel alone?” Joel whispers in a deep grumble against your ear. You can feel it come from his chest. You shudder helplessly.

You shake your head. There’s a feeling of exhaustion from the day's movement settling in and you succumb to it swiftly, resting your head down on him and letting your breathing match to his. Letting him take you over completely.

No, you’re not lonely.

This fate is worse than loneliness.

[longitudinalwaveme]

Flash Characters and the Myers-Briggs Personality Test

I ran the Myers-Briggs Personality test over and over again so that I could get the results for as many Flash characters as I could think of. Here's what I found:

The Top (Roscoe Dillon) 

Architect

INTJ-T

Rational – People with the INTJ personality type (Architects) pride themselves on the power of their mind. They can reframe nearly any challenge as an opportunity to hone their rational thinking skills and expand their knowledge – and with this mindset, they can devise inventive solutions to even the most arduous of problems.

Informed – Few personality types are as devoted as INTJs to developing rational, correct, and evidence-based opinions. Rather than hunches or half-baked assumptions, they base their conclusions on research and analysis. This gives them the conviction that they need to stand up for their ideas, even in the face of disagreement.

Independent – For people with this personality type, conformity is more or less synonymous with mediocrity. Creative and self-motivated, INTJs strive to do things their own way. They can imagine few things more frustrating than allowing arbitrary rules or conventions to stand in the way of their success. Moreover, they are happy to make decisions without outside input or opinions. These individuals prefer to take matters into their own hands.

Determined – This personality type is known for being ambitious and goal-oriented. INTJs won’t rest until they’ve achieved their own definition of success – which usually entails mastering the subjects and pursuits that matter to them. They are not known for taking the easy way out. They feel that the only way to achieve greatness is to face challenges head on.

Curious – INTJs are open to new ideas – as long as those ideas are rational and evidence based, that is. Skeptical by nature, people with this personality type are especially drawn to offbeat or contrarian points of view. And if the facts prove them wrong, these types are generally happy to revise their opinions.

Original – Without INTJs, the world would be a far less interesting place. This personality type’s rebellious streak is responsible for some of history’s most unconventional ideas and inventions. Even in their everyday lives, these personalities force the people around them to consider new (and sometimes surprising) ways of looking at things.

Arrogant – INTJs might be knowledgeable, but they’re not infallible. Their self-assurance can blind them to useful input from other people – especially anyone they deem to be intellectually inferior. These personalities can also come across as needlessly harsh or single-minded in trying to prove others wrong.

Dismissive of Emotions – For this type, rationality is king. But emotional context often matters more than people with this personality type care to admit. INTJs can get impatient with anyone who seems to value feelings more than facts. Unfortunately, ignoring emotion is its own type of bias – one that can cloud this personality type’s judgment.

Overly Critical – These personalities tend to have a great deal of self-control, particularly when it comes to thoughts and feelings. When the people in their lives fail to match their level of restraint, INTJs can appear scathingly critical. But this criticism can be unfair – based on arbitrary standards rather than a full understanding of human nature.

Combative – People with this personality type hate blindly following anything without understanding why. This includes restrictions and the authority figures who impose them. INTJs can get caught up in arguing about useless rules and regulations – but sometimes these battles are distractions from more important matters.

Socially Clueless – INTJs’ relentless rationality can lead to frustration in their social lives. Their efforts to defy expectations may leave them feeling isolated or disconnected from other people. At times, these personalities may become cynical about the value of relationships altogether, questioning the importance of love and connection.

Trickster (James Jesse) 

Campaigner

ENFP-A

Curious – People with the ENFP personality type (Campaigners) can find beauty and fascination in nearly anything. Imaginative and open-minded, ENFP personalities aren’t afraid to venture beyond their comfort zone in search of new ideas, experiences, and adventures. Moreover, their curiosity extends beyond simply seeking novelty. They also have a deep desire to understand how things work and why they are the way they are.

Perceptive – To people with this personality type, no one is unimportant – which might explain how they can pick up on even the subtlest shifts in another person’s mood or expression. Because they’re so sensitive to other people’s feelings and needs, ENFPs can make full use of their caring, considerate nature.

Enthusiastic – When something captures their imagination and inspires them, ENFP personalities want to share it with anyone who will listen. And they’re just as eager to hear other people’s ideas and opinions – even if those thoughts are wildly different from their own.

Excellent Communicators – People with the ENFP personality type brim with things to say, but they can be caring listeners as well. This gives them a nearly unmatched ability to have positive and enjoyable conversations with all sorts of people – even people who aren’t particularly sociable or agreeable.

Easygoing – ENFPs may live for deep, meaningful conversations, but they can also be spontaneous and lighthearted. These personalities know how to find fun and joy in the present moment – and few things give them more pleasure than sharing their joy with others.

Good-Natured and Positive – All of these strengths come together to form a person who is warmhearted and approachable, with an altruistic spirit and a friendly disposition. ENFPs strive to get along with pretty much everyone, and their circles of acquaintances and friends often stretch far and wide.

People-Pleasing – Most people with the ENFP personality type are uncomfortable with the prospect of being disliked. To maintain the peace, they may compromise on things that matter to them or allow others to treat them poorly. And when they fail to win someone over, they might lose sleep trying to figure out what to do about it.

Unfocused – The thrill of a new project – especially one that involves collaborating with other people – can bring out the best in these personalities. But ENFPs are known for having ever-evolving interests, meaning that they may find it challenging to maintain discipline and focus over the long term.

Disorganized – ENFPs’ focus on the big picture and their love for exploring new ideas and experiences can sometimes overshadow their attention to everyday practical matters. Specifically, people with this personality type may try to avoid the routine tasks that they view as boring like household chores, basic maintenance, or paperwork. The resulting sense of disorganization can become a major source of stress in their life.

Overly Accommodating – ENFP personalities feel called to uplift others, and they may find themselves saying yes whenever anyone asks them for guidance or help. But unless they set boundaries, even the most energetic among them can become overcommitted, with too little time and energy to tackle the necessities of their own life.

Overly Optimistic – Optimism can be among this personality type’s key strengths. But ENFPs’ rosy outlook can lead them to make well-intentioned but naive decisions, such as believing people who haven’t earned their trust. This trait can also make it difficult for these personalities to accept hard but necessary truths – and to share those truths with others.

Restless – With their positive, upbeat attitude, ENFPs rarely seem upset or dissatisfied on the outside. But their inner idealism can leave them with a nagging feeling that some major areas of their life just aren’t good enough – whether that’s their work, their home life, or their relationships.

Mirror Master I (Sam Scudder) 

Debater

ENTP-A

Knowledgeable – People with the ENTP personality type (Debaters) rarely pass up a good opportunity to learn something new, especially abstract concepts. This information isn’t usually absorbed for any planned purpose as with dedicated studying – they just find it fascinating.

Quick Thinkers – ENTP personalities have tremendously flexible minds and are able to shift from idea to idea with little effort, drawing on their accumulated knowledge to prove their points, or their opponents’, as they see fit. In fact, ENTPs are the most likely personality type to quickly jump from one topic to another when they are enthralled in a conversation, never missing a beat.

Original – Having little attachment to tradition, ENTP personalities are able to discard existing systems and methods and pull together disparate ideas from their extensive knowledge base to formulate bold new ideas. If presented with chronic, systemic problems and given rein to solve them, they respond with unabashed glee.

Excellent Brainstormers – Nothing is quite as enjoyable to people with the ENTP personality type as analyzing problems from every angle to find the best solutions. Combining their knowledge and originality to splay out every aspect of the subject at hand, rejecting without remorse options that don’t work, and presenting ever more possibilities, ENTPs are irreplaceable in brainstorming sessions.

Charismatic – People with the ENTP personality type have a way with words and wit that others find intriguing. Their confidence, quick thought, and ability to connect seemingly separate ideas in novel ways create a style of communication that is charming, even entertaining, and informative at the same time.

Energetic – When given a chance to combine these traits to examine an interesting problem, ENTP personalities can be truly impressive in their enthusiasm and energy, having no qualms with putting in long days and nights to find a solution.

Very Argumentative – If there’s anything ENTPs enjoy, it’s the mental exercise of debating an idea. More consensus-oriented personality types rarely appreciate the vigor with which these personalities tear down their beliefs and methods, sometimes leading to a great deal of tension.

Insensitive – Being so rational, ENTPs often misjudge others’ feelings and push their debates well past others’ tolerance levels. People with this personality type don’t really consider emotional points to be valid in such debates either, which magnifies the issue tremendously.

Intolerant – Unless people are able to back up their ideas in a round of mental sparring, ENTPs are likely to dismiss not just the ideas but the people themselves. Either a suggestion can stand up to rational scrutiny, or it’s not worth bothering with.

Can Find It Difficult to Focus – The same flexibility that allows ENTP personalities to come up with such original plans and ideas makes them readapt perfectly good ones far too often or to even drop them entirely as the initial excitement wanes and newer thoughts come along. Boredom comes too easily for these active types, and fresh thoughts are the solution, though not always a helpful one.

Dislike Practical Matters – ENTPs, with their preference for spontaneity and novelty, often struggle with organization, structure, and all things practical. People with this personality type are interested in what could be – malleable concepts like ideas and plans that can be adapted and debated. When it comes to hard details and day-to-day execution, these personalities tend to lose interest, often with the consequence of their plans never seeing the light of day.

Captain Cold 

Logistician

ISTJ-A

Honest and Direct – Integrity is at the heart of people with the ISTJ personality type (Logisticians). Emotional manipulation, mind games, and lies of any kind all run counter to their preference for managing the reality of the situations that they encounter with plain and simple honesty.

Disciplined – ISTJs embody integrity through both their words and their actions. Patient and determined, people with this personality type meet their obligations and keep their promises, period. They value structure, follow rules strictly, and respect authority, showcasing their strong will and dutiful nature.

Very Responsible – ISTJs would rather power through and lose sleep than fail to deliver the results that they said they would. Loyal and reliable, they almost always fulfill their duties to the people and organizations that they’ve committed themselves to, and they do so on time and with strict adherence to whatever guidelines were set in place.

Calm and Practical – None of their promises would mean much if ISTJ personalities lost their tempers and broke down at every sign of hardship – they tend to keep their feet on the ground and make clear, rational decisions. Other people’s preferences might be taken into consideration in the process, but ultimately, their decisions are made with practicality in mind.

Organized and Effective – The primary goal of any ISTJ personality is to be effective in what they’ve chosen to do, and they believe that this is accomplished best when everyone involved knows exactly what is going on and why. Clear rules and regulations help people with this personality type maintain order and work in a productive manner.

Research-Oriented – ISTJs are proud repositories of knowledge, with an emphasis on procedures and techniques that enable reliable outcomes. This allows ISTJ personalities to apply themselves to a variety of situations with success, picking up and applying new data as needed to maintain functionality.

Stubborn – The facts are the facts, and people with the ISTJ personality type tend to resist any new idea that isn’t supported by those facts. This factual decision-making process makes it difficult for them to accept that they were wrong about something – but anyone can miss a detail, even ISTJs.

Insensitive – While not intentionally harsh, ISTJs often hurt more sensitive types’ feelings by the simple mantra that honesty is the best policy. These personalities may take emotions into consideration, but really only so far as to determine the most effective way to say what needs to be said.

Always by the Book – ISTJs believe that things work best with clearly defined rules, but this makes them reluctant to bend those rules or try new things even when the downside is minimal. Truly unstructured environments tend to leave these personalities stressed and dissatisfied.

Judgmental – Because ISTJs tend to highly value facts and empirical evidence, they are unlikely to respect people who disagree with proven information – especially those who remain willfully ignorant. When others disregard concrete evidence and instead rely on assumptions or emotions, ISTJs can become judgmental, viewing these individuals as irrational or misguided.

Prone to Burnout – All this can combine to make people with the ISTJ personality type believe that they are the only ones who can see projects through reliably. As they load themselves with extra work and responsibilities, turning away good intentions and helpful ideas, they sooner or later hit a tipping point where they simply can’t deliver. Since they’ve heaped the responsibility on themselves, ISTJs may then believe that the responsibility for failure is theirs alone to bear.

Heat Wave (Mick Rory)

Defender 

ISFJ

Supportive – People with the ISFJ personality type (Defenders) truly enjoy helping others, and they happily share their knowledge, attention, and expertise with anyone who needs it. ISFJs strive for win-win situations, choosing teamwork over competition whenever possible.

Reliable – Rather than working in sporadic, excited bursts that leave things half finished, ISFJ personalities are meticulous and careful. They take a steady approach, ensuring that things are done to the highest standard – often going well beyond what is required. Further, most ISFJs agree that sustaining discipline and reliability becomes easier with time.

Observant – ISFJ personalities have a talent for noticing things, particularly about other people. They pay attention to the smallest details of what someone says and does, giving them unexpected insights into other people’s lives and emotions.

Enthusiastic – When the goal is right, ISFJs apply all of their gifts to something that they believe will make a real, positive difference in people’s lives – whether that’s fighting poverty with a global initiative or simply making a customer’s day at work.

Hardworking – ISFJs don’t just get their work done – they take pride in going above and beyond all of their tasks and responsibilities. People with this personality type often form an emotional attachment to the projects and organizations that they’ve dedicated themselves to, and they won’t rest until they’ve done their share – or more than their share – to be of help.

Good Practical Skills – The ISFJ personality type offers the rare combination of an altruistic nature and hard-won practicality. They don’t just hope to help others. They take action – meaning that they’re more than happy to roll up their sleeves and do what’s necessary to care for their friends, family, and anyone else who needs it.

Overly Humble – ISFJs are so concerned with other people’s feelings that they may refuse to make their thoughts known or to take any duly earned credit for their contributions. They often downplay their efforts entirely when they think that they could have done some minor aspect of a task better.

Taking Things Personally – Although they might try to hide it, people with this personality type are deeply sensitive to others’ opinions, and they can be thrown off-balance if someone doesn’t appreciate, approve of, or agree with them. When they encounter criticism or disagreement – even if it’s well-intentioned – ISFJs may feel as if they’re experiencing a personal attack.

Repressing Their Feelings – Private and reserved, ISFJ personalities tend to internalize their feelings, particularly negative ones. This can create misunderstandings in their relationships. Eventually, all of their repressed feelings and resentments may boil over in a sudden, uncharacteristic outburst of frustration.

Reluctant to Change – ISFJs are among the personality types that struggle the most with change. Breaking with tradition isn’t easy for these steady personalities, who place great value on history and precedent. Even when change is necessary, they may wait until the situation reaches a breaking point before altering course.

Too Altruistic – ISFJs’ giving, generous nature can leave them vulnerable to being taken advantage of by others. It can be hard for them to rock the boat and stand up to someone who isn’t pulling their own weight. In fact, ISFJs are the most likely personality type to say they would rather clean up someone else’s mess than confront them about it directly.

Golden Glider (Lisa Snart) 

Protagonist

ENFJ-A

Receptive – People with the ENFJ personality type (Protagonists) have strong opinions, but they’re far from closed-minded. They recognize the importance of allowing others to express themselves fully. Even when they don’t agree with someone, they recognize that person’s right to voice their truth.

Reliable – Few things bother ENFJs more than the prospect of letting down a person or cause that they believe in. People with this personality type can be counted on to see their promises and responsibilities through – even when it’s difficult to do so.

Passionate – ENFJ personalities brim with interests, and they take great pleasure in pursuing their hobbies – whether that’s hiking, cooking, dancing, growing houseplants, or something else entirely. As a result, they rarely find themselves at a loss for something interesting to do.

Altruistic – ENFJs are known for harboring a deep desire to be a force for positive change in both their personal lives and their professional pursuits. Their unwavering inclination toward fairness often compels people with this personality type to advocate for those who are unable to do so for themselves. Their joy lies in seeing those around them thrive, making their altruism heartfelt and sincere.

Charismatic – Determined and inspiring, ENFJs often find their way into leadership roles. Whether they’re captain of their softball team or a leader on the world stage, they excel at engaging in conversation, captivating people’s attention, and rallying people together behind a common goal. ENFJ personalities also have a profound capacity for empathy that oftentimes causes the people they come across to feel truly seen and valued, further bolstering their natural allure.

Unrealistic – Many ENFJs put pressure on themselves to right every wrong that they encounter. But no matter how hard these personalities try, it just isn’t realistic for them to solve all of the world’s problems. If they aren’t careful, they can spread themselves too thin – and be left unable to help anyone.

Overly Idealistic – ENFJ personalities tend to have clear ideas about what’s right and what’s wrong. They often think that everyone shares these fundamental principles – or, at least, that everyone should share these principles. So it can come as a genuine shock to ENFJs when people violate their core values, such as truth or justice.

Condescending – People with this personality type enjoy teaching others, particularly about the causes and beliefs that matter so much to them. But at times, ENFJs’ attempts to “enlighten” others may come across as patronizing – not the most effective strategy for persuading other people, unfortunately.

Intense – When it comes to self-improvement, ENFJs are rarely short on energy or determination. But they may not recognize that not everyone shares these qualities. At times, these personalities may push others to make changes that they aren’t ready for – or simply aren’t interested in making in the first place.

Overly Empathetic – Compassion is among this personality type’s greatest strengths. But ENFJs have a tendency to take on other people’s problems as their own – a habit that can leave them emotionally and physically exhausted.

Pied Piper (Hartley Rathaway)

Advocate

INFJ-T

Insightful – People with the INFJ personality type (Advocates) know all too well that appearances can be misleading. These personalities strive to move beyond superficiality and seek out the deeper truths in life. This can give them an almost uncanny ability to understand people’s true motivations, feelings, and needs.

Principled – INFJs tend to have strong beliefs and values, particularly when it comes to matters of ethics. They consider lying to be morally wrong, and they make a concerted effort to not deceive others – even when they could directly benefit from doing so. In fact, they are the least likely personality type to say they sometimes take advantage of other people.

Passionate – INFJ personalities crave a sense of purpose in life. Rather than living on autopilot or sticking to the status quo, they want to chase after their dreams. This isn’t a personality type that shies away from shooting for the stars – they are energized and impassioned by the beauty of their visions for the future.

Altruistic – People with this personality type aren’t happy to succeed at another person’s expense. INFJs want to use their strengths for the greater good, and they rarely lose sight of how their words and actions might affect others. In their heart of hearts, they want to make the world a better place, starting with the people around them.

Creative – INFJ personalities aren’t exactly like everyone else – and that’s a wonderful thing. They embrace their creative side, always on the lookout for opportunities to express themselves and think outside the box.

Sensitive to Criticism – INFJs are often averse to criticism, especially if they believe that someone is challenging their most cherished principles or values. When it comes to the issues that are near and dear to them, people with this personality type can become defensive, dismissive, or angry.

Reluctant to Open Up – INFJ personalities value honesty and authenticity, but they’re also private. They may find it difficult to open up and be vulnerable about their struggles, not wanting to burden someone else with their issues. Unfortunately, when they don’t ask for help, they may inadvertently hold themselves back or create distance in their relationships.

Perfectionistic – These visionary personalities are all but defined by idealism. While this is a wonderful quality in many ways, it doesn’t always leave room for the messiness of real life. INFJs might find it difficult to appreciate their jobs, living situations, or relationships if they’re continually fixating on imperfections and wondering whether they should be looking for something better.

Avoiding the Ordinary – INFJs yearn to do extraordinary things with their lives. But it’s hard to achieve anything extraordinary without breaking it down into small, manageable steps. Unless they translate their dreams into everyday routines and to-do lists, they may struggle to turn their grand visions into reality.

Prone to Burnout – INFJs’ perfectionism and reserve leave them with few options for letting off steam. People with this personality type can exhaust themselves if they don’t balance their drive to help others with necessary self-care and rest.

Captain Boomerang Sr. (Digger Harkness) 

Entrepreneur

ESTP-A

Bold – People with the ESTP personality type (Entrepreneurs) are full of life and energy. There is no greater joy for them than pushing boundaries and discovering and applying new tools and ideas.

Rational and Practical – These personalities love knowledge and philosophy, but not for their own sake. What’s fun for ESTPs is finding ideas that are actionable and drilling into the details so they can put them to use. If a discussion is completely arbitrary, there are better uses for their time.

Original – Combining their boldness and practicality, ESTP personalities love to experiment with new ideas and solutions. They put things together in ways that no one else would think to.

Perceptive – Their originality is helped by their ability to notice when things change – and when they need to change! Small shifts in habits and appearances stick out to ESTPs, and they use these observations to help create connections with others.

Direct – ESTPs’ perceptiveness isn’t used for mind games – they prefer to communicate clearly, with direct and factual questions and answers. What you see is what you get with this personality type.

Sociable – All these qualities pull together to make ESTP personalities natural group leaders. This isn’t something that they actively seek – they just have a knack for making excellent use of social interactions and networking opportunities.

Insensitive – Feelings and emotions come second to facts and pragmatism for people with the ESTP personality type. Emotionally charged situations are awkward, uncomfortable affairs, and blunt honesty doesn’t help here. They often have a lot of trouble acknowledging and expressing their own feelings as well, preferring not to dwell on heavy topics or the past for too long.

Impatient – ESTPs move at their own pace to keep themselves entertained. Slowing down because someone else “doesn’t get it” or having to stay focused on a single detail for too long is extremely challenging for them.

Impulsive – Impatience can lead ESTPs to push into uncharted territory without thinking of the long-term consequences. These personalities sometimes intentionally combat boredom with extra risk.

Unstructured – ESTPs see an opportunity – to fix a problem, to advance, to have fun – and seize the moment, often ignoring rules and social expectations in the process. This can result in them getting things done, but it can also create unexpected social fallout if it rubs more traditional personality types the wrong way.

May Miss the Bigger Picture – Living in the moment can cause ESTPs to miss the forest for the trees. People with this personality type love to solve problems here and now – perhaps too much. All parts of a project can be perfect, but the project will still fail if those parts do not fit together.

Defiant – This type won’t be boxed in. Repetition, hardline rules, and sitting quietly while being lectured at are things that ESTP personalities don’t normally enjoy. They are action oriented and hands-on. Environments like school and much entry-level work can be so tedious that they’re intolerable, requiring extraordinary effort from ESTPs to stay focused long enough to get to freer positions.

Weather Wizard (Mark Mardon)

Mediator

INFP-T

Empathetic – People with the INFP personality type (Mediators) don’t just care about those around them in an abstract sense – they can actually feel another person’s emotions, from joy and elation to sorrow and regret. Because of their sensitivity, these personalities tend to be thoughtful and kindhearted, and they hate the idea of hurting anyone, even unintentionally.

Generous – INFPs rarely enjoy succeeding at others’ expense. They feel called to share the good things in their lives, give credit where it’s due, and uplift the people around them. These personalities want to contribute to a world where every voice is heard and no one’s needs go unmet.

Open-Minded – Tolerant and accepting, INFPs try not to judge anyone else’s beliefs, lifestyles, or decisions. This is a personality type that prefers compassion to faultfinding. Many feel empathy even for those who have done wrong. Because they’re so accepting, INFPs often become confidants for their friends and loved ones – and occasionally for total strangers.

Creative – INFP personalities love to see things from unconventional perspectives. Few things give them more pleasure than allowing their mind to wander through all sorts of ideas and possibilities and daydreams. It’s no wonder, then, that many INFPs are drawn to creative pursuits – or that this personality type is well represented among writers and artists.

Passionate – INFPs contain a deep well of passion, primarily driven by their profound empathy, strong internal values, and ceaseless curiosity about the human experience. When an idea or movement captures their imagination, these individuals want to give their whole heart to it. People with the INFP personality type may not always be outspoken, but that doesn’t diminish their strong feelings for a cause that speaks to their beliefs and convictions.

Idealistic – INFP personalities strive to follow their conscience even when doing the right thing isn’t easy or convenient. They rarely lose sight of their desire to live a meaningful, purpose-filled life – one that helps others and leaves the world a better place.

Unrealistic – Nothing in this world is perfect – and that can be a difficult truth for INFPs to accept. People with this personality type can be hopeless romantics, with rose-colored visions of what their lives should be like. This can set them up for disappointment when reality inevitably falls short of their dreams.

Self-Isolating – INFP personalities long to connect with others, but they don’t always know how. Especially in new environments, they may be reluctant to put themselves out there in ways that would help them make new friends or become involved in a new community. As a result, people with the INFP personality type may sometimes feel lonely or isolated.

Unfocused – INFPs’ imaginative, introspective nature doesn’t always lend itself to productivity. Many people with this personality type get frustrated by how difficult they find it to buckle down and get things done. The problem isn’t that they are incapable – rather, it’s that INFPs run into problems when they become so caught up in different ideas and ideals that they fail to commit to a course of action.

Emotionally Vulnerable – The emotional attunement of these personalities is among their greatest strengths. But unless they establish boundaries, they can be at risk of absorbing other people’s negative moods or attitudes. And this can be detrimental to their personal peace and productivity, as INFPs are the most likely personality type to say negative emotions get in the way of their ability to think clearly.

Too Eager to Please – Conflict tends to be stressful for INFPs, who yearn for harmony and acceptance. When someone dislikes or disapproves of them, these personalities may become fixated on trying to clear the air and change that person’s mind. They might even take responsibility and apologize for things that are not their fault at all in an effort to make sure that they are in everyone’s good graces. Unfortunately, INFPs’ desire to please others can drain their energy, eclipsing their inner wisdom and their awareness of their own needs.

Self-Critical – INFPs believe in their unique potential, and they desperately want to live up to it. But this can cause them to have unrealistic expectations for themselves. When these personalities fail to live up to these visions, they may accuse themselves of being useless or selfish or woefully inadequate. Taken too far, this self-criticism can discourage INFPs, leading them to give up on even their dearest dreams.

Mirror Master II (Evan McCulloch) 

Entertainer 

ESFP-A 

Bold – People with the ESFP personality type (Entertainers) aren’t known for holding back. Wanting to experience everything there is to experience, they don’t mind stepping out of their comfort zones when no one else is willing.

Original – Traditions and expectations are secondary to this personality type, if a consideration at all. ESFPs love to experiment with new styles and constantly find new ways to stand out in the crowd. Not stopping at mere outfits, they inject stylistic creativity into their words and actions too. Every day is a performance, and they love to put on a show.

Positive and Enthusiastic – ESFPs are known for their zest for life and infectious enthusiasm. They naturally exude the kind of positivity that lights up a room and draws people to them, and this often translates into an engaging charisma that can inspire those around them. They tend to approach life and its multitude of experiences with an open mind, ready to immerse themselves in the new, the delightful, and the unexpected.

Hands-on and Observant – To ESFPs, the world is meant to be felt and experienced. They prefer to see and do than to wax philosophical about “what-ifs.” With all this focus on the here and now, on doing and acting, it makes sense that ESFP personalities are naturals when it comes to noticing real, tangible things and changes.

Excellent People Skills – More so than things, though, ESFPs love to pay attention to people. They are talkative, witty, and almost never run out of things to discuss. For these personalities, happiness and satisfaction stem from the time they spend with the people they enjoy being with.

Sensitive – ESFPs are strongly emotional and often vulnerable to criticism – they can feel like they’ve been backed into a corner, sometimes reacting badly. This is probably their greatest weakness, because it makes it so hard to address any other weaknesses brought to light.

Conflict-Averse – ESFP personalities sometimes ignore and avoid conflict entirely. They tend to say and do what’s needed to get out of such situations, then move on to something more fun.

Easily Bored – Without constant excitement, people with this personality type often find ways to create it themselves. Risky behavior, self-indulgence, and the pleasures of the moment over long-term plans are all things that ESFPs get into a little too often.

Poor Long-Term Planners – ESFP personalities rarely make detailed plans for the future. To them, things come as they come, and too often they don’t bother with taking the time to lay out steps and consequences, believing that they could change at any moment.

Unfocused – Anything that requires long-term dedication and focus is a particular challenge for people with the ESFP personality type. In academics, dense, unchanging subjects are much more difficult than more dynamic, relatable subjects. The trick for them is to find day-to-day joy in broader goals and to tough it out with those tedious things that must be done.

Trickster II (Axel Walker) 

Entrepreneur

ESTP-A

See Digger for more details.

Captain Boomerang Jr. (Owen Mercer)

Entertainer

ESFP-A

See Evan for more details.

Flash (Jay Garrick) 

Consul

ESFJ-A

Strong Practical Skills – People with the ESFJ personality type (Consuls) are excellent managers of day-to-day tasks and routine maintenance, enjoying making sure that those who are close to them are well cared for.

Strong Sense of Duty – ESFJs have a strong sense of responsibility and always strive to meet their obligations. This often makes them hardworking and efficient in the workplace and very loyal in their personal relationships. They also tend to uphold the traditions that they hold close to their heart with diligence and consistency.

Very Loyal – Valuing stability and security very highly, ESFJs are eager to preserve the status quo, which makes them extremely loyal and trustworthy partners and employees. True pillars of any groups that they belong to – whether it is their family or a community club – people with this personality type can always be counted on to show up and lend a helping hand.

Sensitive and Warm – ESFJs naturally offer others the security and stability that they themselves want and need. They tend to seek out harmony and care deeply about other people’s feelings, being careful not to offend or hurt others. They are strong team players, and win-win situations are the stuff that their smiles are made of.

Good at Connecting with Others – These qualities come together to make ESFJ personalities social, confident, and generally well-liked. They have a strong need to “belong” and have no problem with small talk or following social cues in order to help them take an active role in their communities.

Worried about Their Social Status – ESFJs can become preoccupied with social status and influence, which affects many of the decisions that they make, potentially limiting their creativity and open-mindedness. They can tie too much of their identity to others’ expectations, losing a sense of themselves.

Inflexible – ESFJ personalities place a lot of importance on what is socially acceptable and can be very cautious, even critical, of anything unconventional or outside the mainstream. They may also be unwilling to step out of their own comfort zone, usually for fear of being (or just appearing) different.

Vulnerable to Criticism – It can be especially challenging to change these tendencies because they are so conflict averse. ESFJ personalities can become very defensive and hurt if someone, especially a person close to them, criticizes their habits, beliefs, or traditions.

Often Too Needy – ESFJs need to hear and see a great deal of appreciation. If their efforts go unnoticed, these individuals may start fishing for compliments in an attempt to get reassurance of how much they are valued.

Too Selfless – The other side of this is that ESFJ personalities sometimes try to establish their value with doting attention, something that can quickly overwhelm those who don’t need it, making it ultimately unwelcome. Furthermore, they often neglect their own needs in the process.

Joan Garrick 

Entertainer

ESFP-A

See Evan McCulloch for more details.

Flash (Barry Allen) 

Advocate INFJ-T 

See Pied Piper for more.

Iris Allen 

Protagonist 

ENFJ-A 

See Lisa for more.

Flash (Wally West) 

Entertainer

ESFP-T

See Evan for more .

Linda Park 

Logistician

ISTJ-A

See Len for more.

Dr. Alchemy/Mr. Element (Albert Desmond)

Logician

INTP-T

Analytical – People with the INTP personality type (Logicians) analyze everything that they come across. This gives them a knack for spotting unexpected patterns and connections that other personalities might overlook.

Original – Thanks to their unrelenting imagination, these personalities can come up with creative, counterintuitive ideas that wouldn’t occur to most people. Not all of these ideas are feasible, of course, but INTPs’ willingness to think outside the box can produce remarkable innovations.

Open-Minded – INTPs are driven by curiosity and an intense desire to learn. As they learn, they’re rarely afraid to shift their perspective – even in matters of politics, religion, and philosophy. People with this personality type tend to be receptive to new ideas, as long as those ideas are something that they connect with on an intellectual level.

Curious – These personalities are always casting about for new things to learn about. One week, they might be obsessed with geophysics, and the next, they might lose themselves in videos about guitar building. When inspiration strikes, INTPs go all in on their newfound interest, learning everything that they can.

Honest – INTPs care about the truth. Rather than taking comfort in ideology or received ideas, they want to understand what’s really going on beneath the surface of things. As a result, they can be relied upon to combat bias and misinformation even when it isn’t easy to do so – and they expect other people to be honest with them in return.

Disconnected – INTP personalities can get lost in their own train of thought even when they’re with other people. After finally resurfacing with something to say, they may find that the conversation has moved on without them. This can cause people with this personality type to feel disconnected from others, especially in large social gatherings.

Insensitive – INTPs see rationality as the key to a better, happier world. At times, they may underestimate the importance of such irrational values as emotion, compassion, etiquette, and tradition. As a result, these personalities may inadvertently come across as insensitive or unkind even though their intentions are generally good.

Dissatisfied – People with this personality type can’t help but imagine how things could be better than they already are. INTPs are constantly on the lookout for problems to solve, topics to learn, and new ways to approach things. Taken too far, this mindset can become overwhelming, with these personalities constantly trying to reinvent the wheel rather than reliably addressing their needs and responsibilities.

Overthinkers – INTPs’ minds are ceaselessly active, toiling away even when they’re not consciously thinking. While their rapid-fire thoughts can be beneficial at times, they can also cause them to overthink and fall prey to analysis paralysis. When this occurs, INTPs can struggle to reach a decision or take action because they’re too caught up in considering every possible outcome or angle.

Impatient – INTP personalities take pride in their knowledge and in sharing their ideas. When it comes to explaining their rationale, however, they aren’t always patient. If their conversation partner doesn’t follow along or seem sufficiently interested, they may give up with a dismissive “never mind.”

Dr. Alchemy (Alvin Desmond)

Entrepreneur

ESTP-A

See Digger for more.

Observations:

Linda and Captain Cold have the same personality type--both are ISTJs. So apparently they share more than just their love of hockey. I also feel like Len got more introverted as he got older; younger Len might have ended up with a different personality.

Lisa and Iris have the same personality type as well, with both being ENFJs. This...makes a lot of sense, actually.

The Entertainer (ESFP) personality type seems to be the most common: Wally, Joan, Owen, and Evan all share it.

Is anyone really surprised that Digger and Alvin have the same personality type? (Axel shares the ESTP personality too.)

Hartley and Barry sharing a personality type took me by surprise. Both are INFJs.

The Rogues are shockingly diverse in terms of personality. Of the 11 Rogues, there are 9 separate personality types (Digger and Axel are both ESTPs; Evan and Owen are both ESFPs).

Evan was, by far, the hardest character to come up with a result that felt right, and I'm still not entirely convinced that my final result for him is correct. Part of the problem is that Morrison Evan is so much more personable than, say, Geoff Johns' Evan.

Other characters who were difficult: Weather Wizard (I couldn't believe the result I got for him, but I ran him three different times and got the same result every time, so I guess he must be an INFP) and Barry Allen (I had a hard time balancing his analytical nature with his compassion and love for comics, and it was difficult to figure out how creative he is).

Feel free to discuss the results.

[leoascendente]

PAC// What do you need to know? 🔮

Hi loves! Welcome to this new PAC, I hope you enjoy it💕

Take a deep breath and choose your pile. This is a general reading so take only what resonates with you and leave the rest. Choose more than one pile if you feel drwan to.

Decks I used: Goddess guidance oracle, ethereal visions tarot, shadows and lights oracle, shine from the inside cards.

Pics are from pinterest, credits to their owners.

Pile 1:

Intuitive message: Be open to speak your truth, you are wiser than you like to admit, but your wisdom is needed in this world. You have something important to communicate that will help many others to get in touch with a part of themselves they left forgotten. You are full of potential and in your future awaits a lot of abundance, your voice needs to be heard, don't be afraid to stand for what you believe is right, don't be afraid to fail and learn, and even less be afraid of other people's opinion about you, someday you''l be an inspiration for other people and an example to follow. You have something important to do in this lifetime, focus on that, you are a living master, trust yourself. Sagittarius season will bring you the close of a cicle, you'll feel a lot more confident entering the new year, use these lasts months of the year to leave behind any fear or work in any blockage you are having.

You are getting a higher level of understanding about yourself, mostly with your emotions and how you deal with them. You are ending a healing cicle and understanding why certain things have happened to you in your past, you are reaching a very high level of wisdom. You are learning to listen to your inner voice and attend its needs, maybe you are even in touch with your inner child (if you are not I really recommend you to do it).

For these few last months of the year try to release the burdens you still carry, stop for a while and focus on your healing because this time will be aligning with you for release you from the pain that still remains. Also try to spend more time with your close and beloved ones, time with them will bring you so much happiness and gratitude, you'll feel very supported and protected by them, they'll genuenly show how much they care for you and how much they want to see you being happy. You will find some new friends or collaborators who will help you with your projects.

Focus on: There are some issues that needs to heal yet and for releasing them you need more introspection and learning more about your emotional responses to some situations, you have left behind a lot of hurt but there are still some wounds, they are not bleeding but you need to let them be healed. I feel you already know where this pain comes and it probably has to do something about an important loss you had in your past, you are missing someone or something and that can be making you feel empty sometimes. Don't worry babe, remember all the progress you have made, this is just the remains of what you've been through, you have bloomed into a beautiful version of yourself and you keep blooming, give yourself this time to let that behind and move forward into the new year without unnecesary weight on your back.

Advices:

Breathe in bliss, exhale bullshit

Awaken your authentic self, unleash your wild side

Slow down and rest, you need it

Pile 2:

Intuitive message: You are like the sound of violins and the singing of birds at the same time, you are realizing your inner and outside beauty and getting comfortable in the energy of appreciating yourself as the work of art you are, you are tuning into your Divine Femenine but for the most of you I feel you already embodying it. You're powerful and your precense feels powerful too, you know your worth so don't settle for less than what you know you deserve. You have made a long travel to be where you are now and this journey has taken a lot of energy and sacrifice, value that incredible alchemy you have made within yourself, the mountains from within are the hardest to climb and you have done it greatly and gracefully, enjoy this irresistible essence you are embodying. PS: I hear something about pheromones, is that relevant for you??

You are having a glow up babe! you shine like the sun wherever you go, you are focused into improving youself and your image or aesthetic and it's giving it's fruits. You'll start seeing how people feel naturally drawn to you and it's all because of your energy of self confidence, I feel dark femenine vibes from this pile. You have learnt or at least I see you in the process of stablish healthy boundaries, you are done being a people pleaser, you've spent too much time thinking about other people's feelings or thoughts torwards you and now you are entering in an state of pleasing yourself, you are giving to yourself the value and respect you know you deserve. I see you are becoming a safe place for youself, you are trying to be your own protector and counselor, you could even be embellishing your home and decoring it at your style to make it feel comfy and warm (you could have Cancer Venus/Moon or have any of those planets in the 4th house)

You are in a lucky and fertility time, you are probably harvesting the fruits of your labor, a lot of inspiration and new ideas are coming your way, would be great if you could write them to keep focused on your goals and avoid forget any of them. Don't worry babe, the Justice card here reveals you are receiving your dharma after a long time of releasing karmic patterns, now you understand the importance of feeling good within yourself to feel good about the world around you, you are taking the reins of your destiny and writing your own story. You'll receive good news soon about something you have been dreaming of or even a manifestation of your desires.

Focus on: Allow change to happen in your life, don't try to force or rush anything, just go with the flow of circumstances and cut off any of them that is not giving you good feelings anymore. Clean yourself from any negative energy, take care of your soul, mind and body and give them what they need to have a good functioning, nurture yourself and your needs, even make a deep cleanse in your home or wardrobe if you need to Try to keep like this at least through the eclipse season, after this season pass you'll feel completely renewed

Advices:

Ask for help, it doesn't make you weak

Step out of your comfort zone and try something different

Surround yourself with your soul tribe

Pile 3:

Intuitive message: My pile of geniuses! Your intellect is so wide and rich, give it their proper value because your mind is able to reach answers that other people aren't capable of. You might have felt misunderstood in your past, it doesn't matter babe, you are ment to be understood by people vibing in your same frequency. You see the big picture of life and that can feel like a too big responsability besides of feeling lonley and misunderstood, don't worry babe, it seems difficult now but in the future you'll be so proud of yourself! Focus onn learning a new skill by now, or instead you can improve an skill you already have, just do what makes you feel motivated and comfortable because soon a member of your soul tribe will appear in your life and you'll never feel lonley or judged again

You'll be going through a deep transformation that will reforce your psychic powers and abillities, you are shedding your skin to evolve into a new whole version of yourself. You are going to feel very empowered in your own skin and able to get anything you want in life, dreams you had will become a possibility in your future, you can even get psychic glipmses of what your future will look like, would be great if you could start a dream journal or write in a notebook all the visions or feelings you get. You'll be more in tune with your intuition and your guides, you'll start having a deeper bond with them and somehow their communication with you will be a lot more clear, for some of you, you can even develop a new psychic gift you didn't knew you had. Your communication skill wil also improve and if you are having any problem related to your throat chakra will be solving too, for some of you I hear laugh, so you could be getting a more positive mindset that makes you laugh of the mistakes instead of punishing yourself for that, you'll be a lot more kind with yourself. If you've been working to make your inner child happy you must be currently feeling better with yourself and with a better mood.

I must warn you babe, there's a negative mascuine energy around you and you are aware of who is this king os swords reversed, this person has a very weird and uncomfortable energy, when I try to approach their energy I see the face of a man who was stalking me a while ago. My love, if you feel intimidated by this person and that's the reason you are not taking the action of taking them out of your life you need to tell somebody close to you about this situation or call the authorities of the place you live in. Depending on the circumstances with this masculine energy you'll take different actions but please, don't keep person like this near you, their energy is consuming like a black hole (I could give you more details but what I feel is really creepy and has me a little shocked reminding me of my stalker, I hope you don't mind me stopping here). If this energy comes from a romantic interest watch it with cold head, you might be projectingg your good traits into them and that's not letting you see their true face, you probably have an important karmic lesson related to this person.

Focus on: Try to look within yourself to understand why you have attracted a person with such negative energy, this inner discovery will be hand by hand with the transformation process you are in, this will give you many answers about yourself too. This might has something to do with understanding the signals and synchronicities that your guides give you and the meaning of all of them, for this I find very helpful learning about archetypes and symbolism, books about the meaning of dreams are great tools for learning this king of things.

Advices:

Change one thing today, start small

Commit to self care rituals

Be bold, don't be afraid to stand out

Pile 4:

Intuitive message: You are so loving and caring, your heart knows no limits when it comes to share love, kindness and compassion to others, sometimes you can feel these traits about yourself are not being valued by the people around you but your guides want you to know they don't forget any of your gentle touch in the life of the people around you. They really want you to redirect that loving energy to yourself, be a little more selfish whenn you need to and learn to say no when it's needed becaue now you ar being called to take care of yourself to enter in a new chapter of your life with your batteries charged, in a near future you'll be so amazed with the person you've evolved in.

😌Another glow up pile! Go read pile 2 if you felt called to, you might find extra messages there. You are entering into an state of unconditional love but fully focused to yourself and what makes you happy, you'll be healing your relationship with your physical body as well, treating it with the love and respect you know you deserve. You'll be getting more healthy habits like a workout routine or a change in your eating habits. You are so loving and caring but now you understand that this energy must be first focused to yourself, you'll be honoring your Divine femenine by taking care of yourself and your physical needs. You'll be receiving good news about something good you did to somebody else, this new will fullfil your heart with joy and gratitude. This is like a response of your guides reminding you how close they are for when you need their help, they want you to know how strongly protected you are.

This good new will also give you a new perspective about your life, you'll be more certain about your self worth and what you deserve, your self esteem will heal in such a beautiful way, you'll feel more confident about yourself and will not be afraid to raise your voice to be heard. Someone from your past can appear soon, you'll have the chance to be honest and tell them what you think (this person can be an air sign) you might expect an argument from this person but they will surprise you for the good. Somehow this person attitude or what they have to say will make you feel awesome about yourself. For some I see this person could hurt you in the past and you were expecting any kind of regret about the way they treated you, idk what plan you have torwards this person but after that you'll feel like a living goddess.

Focus on: Feeling sexy and irrisistible, pamper yourself with the things that makes you feel comfortable in your own skin. You can also change your style, your hair or the decoration of your place, make a sacred temple for yourself and water your inner garden. There's something important related to your sexuality you need to get more in touch with, try to make things to heal this energy, maybe you are a little like me, you have your moments of feeling like a living goddess but you get unconfortable when people stare at you or give you compliments, in my case I had to befriend with the siren archetype, you can try it too or look for the archetype you feel more identified with.

Advices:

Get creative and excite your imagination

Keep your thoughts possitive

Trust your intuition, she's always right

Pile 5:

Intuitive message: You are an strong fighter, my love, you have overcome so many battles and most of them just by yourself. You have trusted the Universe and have accepted its challenges for you even when you didn't wanted to, don't worry, this chapter of your life will bring you a reward, you just have to be patient and keep in the present moment. You are Divinely guided, my love, get close to your spiritual team, they are there to help you whenever you need it.

Well... This is a message of encouragement and recover hope in life, you've been through a lot, a I mean a looooooot in your life. It's pretty awesome that you are able to keep having faith that life has somethinig better for you, value and honor that hope you have within because it will be the compass that leads you to the life of your dreams. Your guides are providing you giving you what you need for the moment, when it's the time they will give you what you really want, this is just a process and a journey of self discovery and it's worthy to transit it. Your guides also tell you to start asking them more of their help, they are just right there but you have been carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders and they want you to know that you don't have to, ask them for guidance and they will give you a sign of their precense.

Your energy has been feeling very low for these past few months, I feel exhaustation and anxiety, maybe you've been even having problems for sleeping. You've been lacking enjoyment in your life, maybe you've felt a little depressive, if you feel like this I would recommend you any kind of therapy you feel comfortable doing, ik some of you might not like it but when we feel like this we need a helping hand that helps us understand what's going on and give us some answers, we can't do everything by ourselves always and we don't have always the answer to our problems. You deserve to feel happy and plenty, don't worry because you will be but first you need to attend yourself and heal from the pain you've been feeling, winter is always a wonderful time to rest, reconnect with our essence and gain strengths for the spring, so would be great if you could work on yourself and your healing journey, I promise that if you do you'll find a lot of relief and your guides will be there to help and provide what you need to keep going on, they will also make you feel you have a good company by your side when you get tired of humans 😊

Focus on: Your uniqueness and inner magic, get in tune with your intuition, try to practice any kind of divination, get a pendulum... anything that helps you develop the priestess you have within. You have psychic gifts and they are jewells waiting to be polished, don't be afraid because nothing bad will happen to you if you listen to your heart. The eclipse season will feel lighter for you but you might see the people around you tense and anxious, just focus on resting and cleaning your energy.

Advices:

Tune into your inner peace, you deserve a break

Trust your intuition, she's always right

You are pure magic

Pile 6:

Intuitive message: You've been projecting your energy outside for too long, it's time to rest and reconnect with your creative side and keep away from the negative energies around you. You have something relevant to do but there are people getting in your way or distracting you, for some you can be even recieving bad energy for making you stop progressing. Somehow you are conscious about these draining people or situations but you are not sure of what you should do. Don't put a mask to fit or be accepted by somebody else, if you have to fake who you are when you are with somebody that person is not giving you anything positive. You need to let yourself just be and enjoy, don't reject your beautiful essence for somebody else because that's cruel to you and you don't deserve to feel that unecessary pressure. If this energy comes from a brunette female, mostly a friend, be careful because there's a feeling of envy and competition coming from this female.

I feel an energy of discomfort from you, maybe this is a recent feeling or you've been dealing with it for a long time, whatever your situation is you are being called to groud yourself and work in your root chakra, probably heart chakra is calling for balance too. Your best skills to deal with this and keep evolving is to reconnect with Mother Earth, reforce your connection with nature and animals, spend more time indooors making a cozy home for you. Creativity is another important skill to improve, I'm pretty sure that the skills you develop related to these 2 themes is going to open a door for abundance in your future and this is just the learning process for you to do something important with your knowledge in the future, also this will help you relief that hard feeling you had.

The word that comes to my mind all the time is pressure and 10 of wands confirms that there's something feeling very heavy in your life, I feel it mostly related to somebody else's attitude torwards you or the relationship you have with somebody. You are not being grounded and this is leading you to be surrounded by confusing energies, you have the artist card too telling you that you are spending too much time in your imagination and not in the present moment, but I want to give you more happy news. Meditate more often, meditation gives you an space for the daydream too and you can use it to visualize the life you want to live, learn about asssumption law and manifesting so you can use your vivid imagination at your favor. Avoid focusing too much in resentment because karma is always working so it's not necessary for you to worry about somebody else's consequences of their actions, the most important thing for you should be have a clear conscience. For some of you I'm hearing something about feeling guilty, if that's your case you should know that guilt is a chatholic construction to makes us feel unworthy and hopeless when we make the "wrong choice", instead of guilt use the word responsability, if you did something that makes you feel uncomfortable with your own behavior take the responsibility of braking that pattern by healing yoursef. Learning to be generous with ourselves makes us understand better how can we be generous with others.

Focus on: Stop pleasing people and keepeng away from dramatic people or situations, sometimes the cost of being truly ourselves is making some people uncomfortable but that is necessary too, if someone to feel happy wants you to be someone you are not they don't love you unconditionally and you deserve unconditional love. this is probably a wound you have, to reject your happiness to make others happy, this is a beautiful trait that talks so well about you, but this also can make you naive and compleisant with insatisfaction. Who really loves you want to see you shine, will get happy everytime you overcome fear to become a greater and healthier version of yourself, don't worry babe, the correct people will come when it's the time and probably you have very good people by your side (mostly family) at the moment, then leave the people that leaves a negative influence behind and keep the ones that want you to succed close to you, you'll feel a lot lighter than before. This will also brings a healing process that feels very loving so I feel that you are going to have an extra spiritual guidance through this time, if you felt called to pile 1 or 5 go read it because it tells you too to approach your guides and ask them for help.

Advices:

Align your intentions with your actions

Stay away from drama today

Show off your sparkle and shine from the inside

[codename-adler]

28: Yanko Florescu (22) USC Trojans Backliner

(USC Trojans lineup of OCs)

Ah, big ginger man makes Mateo brain go brrrr!

*Yanko is supposed to have a little bit grown out buzzcut but I couldn't find a gif that satisfied my mental image so. That but cropped. He shaves it every month on the 28th. Call that sports superstitions.

With Jean, Viggo and Nikita, he is one of the tallest Trojans, standing at 6'4. With Nikita also, and Mari, and others, one of the most unproblematic teammate ever. He is so chill, but in a different way than others. Mari is chill because she does not care enough about anyone's bs outside of Exy; Nikita is chill because of his infinite patience and open mind. Yanko? Nothing fazes him, because he is so inside his own mind, minding his own business, that rarely anything else registers, and if something does show up on his radar, he does not have an overly sensitive personality, so he is able to put his emotions aside and deal with what's at hand. He might be on the AS in that area. You tell me. However, nobody on the team, and I mean nobody, has ever seen him lose his cool, either in anger or sadness. He has the occasional goofy-looking smile, or a small private thing. He's very good at straight-faced comebacks. If he's acting silly, his face rarely shows anything but a mischievous glint.

Yanko can appear scary, because he's very tall, very quiet. minimally expressive, and his goddamn fucking blue eyes are very... there. He might seem broody and gruff, but that's because his brain-to-mouth connection isn't always working, and he really enjoys being in his own bubble, so sometimes if you intrude on that time, it takes him a few seconds before he understands what is happening but his facial expression might take over before he has the chance to adapt. He's just a big mountain man, big to survive and adapt to harsh winters, not to harm! But his opponents would differ.

He does resemble Mari a lot, but they really don't have the same vibe, trust me. They are not on the same wavelength. Mari carefully curates how she experiences life so as not to get bullshit and waste energy on things and people that don't matter. Yanko is just that unbothered because he does not see the point. Physical embodiment of 'it is what it is' you know?

His two best friends are George A. and Viggo. Though those two are a piece of work because they always be in impossible situations Yanko has to get them out of, he likes them for their lightheartedness, and because they make him happy. And they know it. They don't tell him to smile more, or let loose. They love him as he is, love how reliable and steady he is, how helpful and generous he is. Yanko likes to simply be in their presence, no matter how loud they can be, no matter the trouble they attract.

Yanko was born in the US to Romanian parents, he studies Psychology at Dornsife and he goes Pro after college. He is a very, very smart and hard-working student/person.

He is the sunscreen dealer, because that man would have burned 5 years ago if he hadn't ransacked a Costco. He's got tubes and balms and jars everywhere: car, backpack, locker, dorm, duffel, emergency kit, etc.

Now the Mateo part.

Yanko has always been of the same opinion as Kevin Day: it's easier to remain heterosexual. Even lower than that: it's easier to remain single. He's not a high-maintenance guy by any means, but all his relationships' beginnings were always just that, beginnings. He has a deep, deep potential and will to invest himself wholly in another person's wellbeing, but girls usually break it off, gently or not, before it even gets there. He's peculiar, he gets it, but it begins to feel draining to have to start over every time. He doesn't want to hear another 'you're too quiet' or 'you never look like you enjoy my presence'. He doesn't want nor have to explain himself, and so if the date really can't see past that, then he's not going to dedicate energy and time to that. After high school, he completely stops looking for dates. Instead, he works on himself, and knowing himself. Plus, Psychology and Exy? Yeah, no, he'll pass on girls.

That's right, girls. Yanko has never dated men, ever, and never even thought about it. If he doesn't even think about dating, thinking of dating a guy is even less probable. It's just not... something he registers. So this... thing, with Mateo? First time for him too. And yeah, Mateo is a weird af choice for a gay awakening, because he might be pretty, but he's a whole-ass bastard. Eh, what can you do.

Because Yanko is very difficult to piss off, to get a reaction out of, he's kind of perfect to handle Mateo and his demons. The catch, though, is that Yanko also suddenly becomes very good at pushing Mateo's buttons. In a way, it helps Mateo to expulse all the shit that pollutes his brain, so he's calmer afterward. But it also gives Yanko special power over Mateo. And Yanko kind of likes that.

He is not in denial, okay? I swear. He's just so fucking oblivious. He doesn't put the finger on the actual thing until he literally kisses Mateo. And he has the galls to be so fucking smug about it. Like the cat that got the cream, Archimedes who figured out his eureka or whatever it is. Mateo is able to make him feel that way. Proud and powerful in ways he never felt before.

Yank takes it in stride like a fucking champ. It's like 'Welp, I'm dating Mateo now. He is my squishy and I like him so much. No, he sucks to you. Now back to our regular program: Exy. Yippee!' It's really, really not that deep. The romance part is more nerve-wracking than the gender part, if anything. He doesn't want to lose the essence of what he has developed with Mateo.

Of course it's much more complicated on Mateo's end, like I said, but Yanko knows, and feels, that he is not a waste of time and energy. That he actually motivates Yanko. He simply waits him out. He's there whenever Mateo needs, whenever he wants, and doesn't ask for anything in return, because what is the rush? It does make Mateo mad and jealous that Yanko is taking this so well, but it's also a steadying presence, that when the world is collapsing around you to take a new uncertain shape, Yanko is just there, same as he always was, ready to back you up, push you further, steady hand upon your back.

Anddd wrapping up on the cool & unproblematic king now!

[spoiled-fawn]

John Price; Drop Everything Now.

Part 2

CW: PTSD, Songfic inspired by "Sparks Fly" (Not in a cringe way I promise)

GN!Reader who is a sergeant on TF141. WC: 2,262

AN: I needed to post this before I completely tore it apart (again) and decided to scrap it. LMK if you'd like a part two because I have a good chunk of it but unsure if I'd like to continue this since I want the PTSD to linger and not be just diminished because reader is love of his life (I'd like to at least try to have some realism, rip). This was actually created for a test run of writing PTSD so I am happy to take any constructive criticism or tips for writing it. Hope you enjoy!

Being stationed in the Middle East meant that you weren't used to much besides the hot sun baring down on every activity you did and dust storms that would blow over, which effectively made you shut your mouth to not breathe in the dirt. However, that didn’t mean that Mother Nature would not bless the dry lands with an ounce of rain every once in a while. 

You wouldn’t know about the rain usually unless you were outside training or on a mission when the dark clouds would roll in, giving you a rare break from the sun. Other times, the clouds would cover the stars and moon in the night sky, but you wouldn't be able to tell just what kind of clouds they were. 

And that, unfortunately, is how tonight is going without your knowledge.

The rain was never an issue on base, its greatest hindrance being the lack of vision, the annoyance of getting wet, and the general time it would take to wait it out. However, there was always the unspoken thought of the thunderstorms that could arise. 

You’ve served two years within TF141 as a sergeant, having been recruited and transferred to be on base under Price’s command. Now having some experience under your belt, you’ve seen a thing or two- but nothing compared to your superiors.

From an external point of view and reflection on yourself, it brings a possibility that your mind has yet to realize if the memories are getting trapped within yourself. Your nervous system may have gotten stuck in the past at a few points in time, but while you remain living in the action, your biggest symptom is nightmares and anxiety that you brush off each time.

The same can’t be said for your Captain.

Price, with his two decades of service, has lived through more than you could ever imagine and things he wishes to not recall. He plays the classic tough guy act, brushing his emotions off as something he can deal with when he’s home and not deployed- nor does he want to even believe they are necessary to process, his ways still being a bit old-fashioned.

When you were recruited, his viewpoint shifted a bit. Price wasn’t sure that you would be a good fit within the team, and debated putting you on a platoon further down the branch that he still oversaw from time to time. Yet, during your grace period, he would check up on you- being sure to debrief with you after long days of training exercises or drills that were getting harder and harder. When you had proven your worth to him and the team, an unspoken agreement between you two was formed. You would casually reside in his presence but keep it under the notion of him offering guidance to the rookie. This often resulted in you filling out reports or paperwork on your laptop in his office while he worked at his desk.

Price was not a sharer of his inner turmoil. But, sometimes, you would confide in him and he would allow a sliver of a softer man to peak out in the late hours of the night.

That's how the deeper part of your relationship worked with him. Hard-ass by day, and a mildly reserved man by late night. You’re close with the entirety of the team, but you’ve always had an attraction to Price, classically never trying to show it or verbalize it to anyone. Yet, you had a good hunch that he already knew from your softened behavior towards him when the veil of superior and subordinate came down to friends in the dark glow of his office.

You knew it was a bad idea to ever indulge yourself in having his attention and reciprocating it, but now you over-indulged for the last year and find yourself with a cavity at the sweetness you suck from his words. Your mind is always left in a trance on any touch he unknowingly spoiled you with; a hand to the small of your back, adjusting your elbows if you were using a heavier loadout during training, or a pat on the head after a job well done.

Tonight, the storm rolls in with thunder chasing right behind it. 

It's late in the evening as you stand in the common room, having had dinner late, and washing the dishes while quietly humming to yourself. The subconscious part of your mind notices the flashes of lightning and deep thunder that penetrate the barriers of the base but leaving it as a non-threat. You wash your dinner plate, moving the sponge around, but before you can put the plate down to dry, your phone rings with a call from Price. 

It's not unusual for him to call when he decides he’d like your presence while completing paperwork, yet your eyebrows furrow as you see the time to be later in the night than his usual request.

Before you can even speak into the phone after answering, your ear is polluted with the sound of his ragged breaths; the sound of rain hitting the ground is amplified more than what you hear while being inside. It sends a roll of skin-prickling anxiety down your spine as your eyes widen. “Price?” You ask after a blink, trying to understand what this call could be.

You hear it when he speaks, a tremor in the back of his throat and you can imagine the adrenaline-crazed look on his face. The sound of your name is called from him, and it almost sounds questioning, as if he isn't sure it's you, even though he called.

“I- I don’t know where I am…” He pants out, sounding choked up, trying to swallow air and the lack of saliva in his throat while in the pouring rain.

Drop everything now

Without a second thought, you drop the plate, the clatter of it breaking once hitting the ground echoes in the common room and snaps everyone's attention on you. Not having any need for apologies or reason, your body is already supplying the adrenaline needed to set into a dead sprint out of the common room as you weave past the other bodies to push through the hallway and enter the stairwell with the clamor of the metal doors swinging open.

“John, where are you- tell me what you see.” You call out as your body gets set on autopilot, practically flying down the stairs of the barracks and onto the ground floor moving into the hallways. “Do you see the training yard or do you see a road?” You pant out while pushing to find the exit door of the base.

It's here and now, that you now actively recognize the roll and clap of thunder as if it's taunting you to hurry up and find Price before it does.

But it seems it already has.

Each door, person, and corner you pass feels like a deliberate obstacle, frustrating you as you try to get outside faster.

“I- I see a road and the-” He’s interrupted by a bright flash, a strong shake of thunder following right after, and you hear him grunt in aggravation at the sound he lacks control over. With a call of your name, he makes a quiet plea. “Please, I need you here. Now.” He manages to ground out with a sharp breath, causing you to almost second guess yourself at what he said. 

You bank a hard left, towards the East entrance, finding the door to take you outside towards the main road that leads to the base's entrance. Shouldering the large door, you grit your teeth while taking the metal harshly against yourself, but almost come to a halt when you feel the pouring rain pelt on your body.

Meet me in the pouring rain

“Please.” His voice shakes again through the phone, and the rasp from his panting re-escalates the adrenaline through your body.

It breaks your heart to hear him sound like this as if he’s succumbing to his demons. “John, I’m gonna find you but you need to help me, ok?” You ask as your legs begin to burn from the force that you run through the damp earth with. “-you see the flag pole? ” You bark out while another flash of lightning crosses the sky, closing your eyes as you wince. “Hey- listen to me, focus on me.” You command, praying that he isn’t locked inside his memories.

After a moment, “Y- Yes, I see it. The- the rains comin’ down hard- won't fucking stop.”

The shake in his voice is back; he’s shivering and his irritability is beginning to build up faster as it makes itself evident the longer he stays held within the turmoil of his nervous system.

Running and finally entering the main yard after having had to cut through the detached buildings to make it to the front, you place your free hand over your eyes to try and gain some semblance of visibility while the flashes of lightning aid for a moment.

“Meet me there. It’ll be just you and me, only us.” You pleaded with a hint of firmness, needing to direct him as you move with haste towards the lit flagpole, the light being a beacon through the pelting rain.

While running in the dark and wet ground, you lose footing and slide your foot into loose gravel; your right elbow is now scraped while you clatter to the ground with a “Fuck-” Your voice breaks through the night air, as your yelp of pain staccatos out in the silence between the flash of light and complimenting rumble of thunder. 

In a moment before you can stand up, you hear your name being yelled out, whipping your head up in response. The raw tenacity of his voice through the thrumming of rainfall hits when there is no other force of the storm that can distract either of you.

Your gazes find each other; he looks frozen for a moment, then immediately runs to you.

“John-“ falls past your lips in a cry when you spot him. His fatigues stick to his body, his hair wet and bucket hat long gone. Making his way hurriedly, his body slows with unexpected grace as he helps you to your feet. Almost as if in a hurried frenzy, you latch onto him by his arms, blinking through the falling rain as you look up and search his face. 

The expression he wears, as he makes sure you’re alright, contradicts the voice he had just seconds earlier; his eyebrows furrowed with worry as he checks over you, quickly placing his large hands on your ribs to stand you upright as if you are a toddler who has just taken a tumble.

“Bloody- You alrigh’ sweetheart?” He asks as the warmth of his panting breath fans across your face while pulling you up against him.

“I’m ok, I just slipped from the rain. Thank you.” You speak while still holding him tight, latching onto him. Your heart aches at seeing him care for you no matter where his mind places him, always putting others before himself.

John nods, letting out a small sigh. The feeling of your warmth against his chest brings him back down as he looks over you, trying to blink the anxiety and rain from his eyes. The feeling of his hands, cold and now gentle, glides up to move the wet hair from your eyes. It surprises you for a moment as he stays completely silent besides the tremoring breaths he takes.

At the silence, you let a small huff of laughter escape before closing your eyes and giving a smile in relief at having him in your sight and arms, before fluttering your eyes open to gaze up at him. 

You return the gesture when you move your hand to wipe his hair off of his forehead, the rain having matted it down to his skin. “With me as I’m with you. Always with you, John.” The lull of your voice surprises both of you as it can be heard perfectly in the rain, with no sign of thunder or lightning interrupting your words. 

John cups the base of your skull, looking at the raindrops that fall in small splashes and trails along your face. His eyes dilate when focused on you, the sight of him this close and his icy blue eyes keep steadfast on you, leaving a haunting mark on your memory and heart.

He moves his head down to meet yours; pausing for a moment as if he isn't sure this is real- he isn’t sure that this isn’t a dream and his mind is granting him a wish. Is this a true trick of his mind? This can't be a memory, surely-

He looks as if he’s in pain, so you take the last leap of faith for him.

The new and added warmth of his lips on yours is tender. It contrasts the rough environment of where you stand, the life you both live and the constant battles faced within. Your arms and his alike move to wrap around each other in a harsh and tight embrace.

As the raindrops fall all over both your faces, you feel as if you’re in a movie and the climax has just hit when the lovers are united.

You both are soaking wet, but neither of you seems to mind. He pulls you back into him, deepening the kiss with a determined and desperate force.

Kiss me on the sidewalk

Take away the pain.

[truegoist]

What do you think about spending halloween night with blue lock characters?

Halloween is a big deal here so I may have went a bit overboard but idc. Happy Halloween !! (excuse me if this is wonky I just woke up)

WARNINGS : gn reader(no prns mentioned) , could be interpreted as romantic or platonic , general halloween themes

when halloween comes there’s three types of people you can find around ;;

THE CLASSICS ;; they’re the embodiment of halloween spirit and do all the traditions but most importantly, they’re never “too big” for trick or treat , after all what’s better than walking hand to hand with you, pockets full of candy?

BACHIRA ; he was so excited for for this !! You two wore matching costumes and practically went to every house in 10 km radius . When you went to home you were exhausted so just ended up having a sleepover in his place ! just don’t let him have a sugar rush the next day

KUNIGAMI ; kids LOVE him so he ended up babysitting a bunch of them going trick or treat(so there’s no bombs in their lollipops) and he was so glad that you agreed to come along too. At the end he’s carrying sleeping kids to their homes and even if how much you may protest, he is carrying you back home too

SHIDOU ; he drags you EVERYWHERE it doesn’t matters if the house’s lights are off and you start to suspect he’s here more for the trick part than treat. Even so he makes sure you’re entertained and have a bunch of candy, he also tries to scare you using the decorations

OTHERS ;; aryuu , NANASE , hiori , ness

THE PARTY ANIMAL ;; every holiday is a chance for a part for them and halloween is no exception to that , enter the probably over decorated house and if you’re lucky you’ll have some good food and a dj with a good music taste , even if not they will make sure you will stay entertained for the whole night

REO ; it’s the most fancy party you’ve ever seen , there’s even zombie waiters around, carrying halloween themed snacks and to admit, it’s kinda too much . But you know how much Reo worked on this and who are you to ruin his fun? Just grab his hands and dance all night !!

SAE ; it’s hosted by a sponsor he said, im only here because I have to and you’ve never seen someone try as hard as him to hide that he’s having fun . Like chill boy nobody will figure out you have a heart deep inside. He has the classic itoshi resting bitch face but you can see the shine in his eyes as you two chatted

YUKIMIYA ; unlike the guy above, he genuinely doesn’t wants to be here; some lameass “party” full of boasting business man and agencies trying to make contracts with him, only thing that’s making this tolerable is you next to him, talking shit about everyone around behind their backs. After a hour you two can’t stand it and went to hide in the balcony instead

OTHERS ;; aiku , OTOYA , karasu , kaiser

THE SHUT-IN ;; these guys…they would rather be in house than outside in halloween, it’s either that they hate it or just don’t have any spirits. Well you can still have fun I guess (IM SORRY I just love halloween and hate just ins okay)

NAGI ; halloween? Isn’t that the holiday where you go around to get candy? You can’t believe him. This guy says he forgot today was halloween, and all the costume ideas you sent him were just your weird fashion sense…or so he says but you can see the little cape and paper fangs he put on Choki and the games he picked for the two of you suspiciously revolve around monster and horror themes…maybe he has spiritus after all

RIN ; for halloween he invited you over to his house for a horror movie marathon. even if you might’ve said you don’t like horror movies his judgmental look(and words) made you come. And you’ve never seen someone watch a horror with a face as straight as his, the only emotion he shows is the small smile he has when he turns around to see you all snuggled up against him.

BAROU ; he…dislikes halloween to put simply. so when he invited you over he was just thinking about hogging you all to himself what he didn’t expect was for you to come over with a bunch of costumes and candy. So now he is sitting there, letting you add to his new halloween look. No he doesn’t enjoys this. He is just being forced to this…by invisible forces and the smile you have

OTHERS ;; chigiri , kurona , GAGAMARU , NIKO

[storiesbyjes2g]

3.149 Perfect fit

I originally thought having Dad's service at the cemetery was a good idea, but Mama convinced me to do the memorial part at the house. Afterward, we'll take him to the cemetery and say our goodbyes in private; she said we'll need that. Plus, the weather in Newcrest was gonna be iffy, so she didn't want to risk having everyone standing around in the rain. As if I'd need one more reason to seal the deal, she reminded us this will be our first time traveling with a baby. We didn't need that extra layer of complexity on top of an already emotional moment. At the house, we'll be more at ease and have easy access to anything she'll need.

Once dressed, I grab Desi, head downstairs, and park her on the play mat. The toys hanging above her and the new perspective of the dining room captivated her instantly. I pull out my phone to send Dub a text to wish his daughter a happy birthday, only to find one from him saying he's thinking of us today. I thank him and suggest, when all of this is over, we get our families together for some much needed fun. No sooner than I hit send, Dwayne called, also extending condolences. I guess my phone will ring a lot for a while. But he had another motive and extended an offer for help any way we needed. My first instinct was to decline. I had resolved my issues with him, and he and dad had made peace, so it wasn't about that. It was simply a mindless response on autopilot. But I thought about it before the words left my mouth. Our friends and neighbors will be in our faces us all afternoon to comfort us and express condolences. Plus, I'll need to make sure we have enough food. Sophia will more than likely have Desi, Mama will be a mess, and Alessia will decline all opportunities to take charge. We need a neutral third party to keep things together while we're all encumbered in one way or another, so I accepted his generous offer. It felt weird to admit, but he's the best man for the job. Outside of our family, he knew Ali the best, despite their limited relationship. He was glad to help, though a little nervous about the details. I allayed his anxiety and told him he didn't have to give a speech or anything unless he wanted to. I just needed someone to keep things organized, kinda like an emcee, but not really. All he has to do is welcome everyone as they come in and create space for our guests to say a few words if they want. He graciously accepted the charge. I laughed to myself after hanging up, amazed at how far we've come. I went from near hating the man to opening my home and letting him in on a private family matter. It's amazing what time and a bit of maturity can do.

He arrived early and complimented our home, saying this was his first time in San Sequoia. I introduced him to Sophia, officially. She saw him at the wedding, of course, and knew he was Mama's man friend, but I never made formal introductions. We also introduced him to Desiree. I wish I had time to further our friendship. I mean, after doing this for us and giving those kind words at the wedding, I think it's pretty clear he is our friend now. There's so much I don't know about him, and from the way he speaks, I feel he's someone who enjoys cheerleading his loved ones from the sidelines. He would have been a cool step-dad, I guess. But it's too late for that now. Hopefully, it will be a few more days before he and Mama pass, but hope is all I really have.

[atiny-for-life]

Regarding Wooyoung's Health

I thought it's best to make my own post to reach more people who may be concerned or confused about what Wooyoung is currently going through.

I'm glad KQ has always taken their health serious because there will be a lot of adjustments that'll have to be made to ensure Wooyoung's safety in the future so he can keep thriving as an artist and just as a person in general.

From what I've read up on, cholinergic uriticaria (which is the specific type he's dealing with according to the KQ announcement) is common but not yet fully understood (as is the case for most conditions). What you should know is that attacks can be caused by the following triggers:

Exercise (most common trigger)

High temperature exposure, eg, hot showers, saunas

Spicy food ingestion

Emotional stress (anger, anxiety, etc.)

I hope you can see why this would make it hard for someone who performs on stage for a living to be diagnosed.

To show you how absolutely serious this is, attacks can lead to the following:

Hives and skin irritation

Low blood pressure

Tightening of the respiratory muscles, leading to shortness of breath and wheezing

Angioedema, which is an abrupt, temporary, localised swelling of the deep dermal layer, subcutaneous tissue, and mucous membranes that can spread to the upper respiratory tract and intestines

Headaches

Abdominal cramps and diarrhoea

Asthma

Anaphylactoid and anaphylactic reactions

And more

But there are also good news: most affected see a strong improvement in their condition within just a few years of diagnosis and a full disappearance of symptoms after some time, which is fantastic and something I want everyone to keep in mind.

So please, send your love and support to Wooyoung, tell him to prioritize his health, that you want him to be safe and happy, but avoid phrases like "get better soon" because that's not how chronic conditions work and for the love of everything, don't tell him you're disappointed you won't get to see him or something along those lines - that comes across as cruel when you're in a situation completely outside your control. The last thing you should want is for him to feel guilty on top of everything else.

It's gotta be positivity only from here on out. If you care about him, you can send him pictures of your pets, tell him you love him and you're happy he's taking care of himself. The best medicine is laughter for a reason! Feeling good mentally makes your body stronger too so keep that in mind whenever you choose to leave a comment or send him a message.

From how we've heard Ateez talk about KQ, they'll make any adjustments necessary to ensure Wooyoung's safety and happiness so just be patient, wait for updates, and understand this is easiest for us and hardest for him so disregard your own feelings about the situation and keep in mind health comes above all else. Thank you!

Further reading:

Cleveland Clinic

DermNet

DocCheck Flexikon (German)

MedicalNewsToday