#like my asexuality. i dont want anything to do with like. how sex is as it is but like. hey if you wanted to grip me like a bowling ball

[starsthewitch]

“you can’t be asexual.. relationships like that are basically friendships, you need to have sex in one”

a REAL quote from my mother

it was said after i explained asexuality and just as i was about to tell her that i was ace myself, she said this

and somehow, shes okay with me being a lesbian, but somehow draws the line at me being an asexual one

literally how do i tell her a relationship can still be romantic just without all the sexual aspects

like YES i want to kiss a girl a lot so very very bad and we cuddle on the couch watching our favorite movies

YES i want to be cooking with my future girlfriend and she comes up to me hugging me from the back and kissing me

relationships without sex just sounds so peaceful? like no pressure to one day have sex with that person or to not expect anything like it

allosexual people just dont get it and it sucks

[drchucktingle]

do you have any tingler suggestions for an asexual and aromantic buckaroo?

YES BUD all preferred pounds are valid including NO POUND AT ALL and this is very important, as i am sure my aromantic and asexual buds know.

as a buckaroo who spends a lot of time fighting against gatekeeping i will use this as opportunity to say yet again ALL ARE WELCOME IN THE TINGLEVERSE ESPECIALLY MY ACE AND ARO BUCKAROOS.

in fact, after chucks upcoming horror novel CAMP DAMASCUS i have another horror novel coming out next year from same publisher called BURY YOUR GAYS (i am being secret about plot of for now but trust me tumblr buds will like this one) but one of the MAIN LEADS of 'bury your gays' is an asexual aromantic bud and she is such a fun character REALLY enjoyed writing her and i am excited for everyone to meet her.

ALRIGHT as far as tinglers go i have written MANY pound free books that you can enjoy, some are about an ace or aro way and some are about consent or saying NO THANKS BUD but they all do not have sex in them. the favorite of most buckaroos is probably ABSOLUTELY NO THOUGHTS OF POUNDING DURING MY FUN DAY WITH THIS KIND T-REX BECAUSE I'M AROMANTIC AND ASEXUAL AND THAT'S A WONDERFULLY VALID WAY OF PROVING LOVE IS REAL

if you are interested in whole collections there are paperbacks name of NOT POUNDED BY ANYTHING that you would probably enjoy. this series has three whole volumes just keep in mind not all characters in these bundle are ace and aro but MANY are. others just dont feel like a pound.

examples of stories that are more about consent and importance of HOLDING BOUNDARIES would be something like JUST KIND OF IGNORING THIS SAD LONESOME T-REX WHO IS SCREAMING "DEBATE ME" FROM HIS FOLDING CHAIR which is about how sometimes best way to deal with goofball conservative 'commentators' is just ignore their scoundrel whining as they moan their lonesome ways in the dark. so there are no pounds in that one just ignores. it is available as audiobook and so is ace aro story above too.

anyway buckaroo hope that helps. if you want to see full list you can look on chuck website and trot down to section of tinglers that says NO SEX

thank you for proving love is real in your own way i am SO GLAD our timelines have crossed it is an honor and i appreciate it very much. had fun time revisiting these books today and look forward to writing more for my asexual and aromantic buds. LOVE IS REAL

[harucchii]

Why ARE you proud of your asexuality, exactly? And how did and does it shape how you are as a person, having a natural lack of sexual attraction to anyone? What makes it important enough to celebrate? I'm asking genuinely because I don't understand and would like to. Thank you.

Hi! happy pride month :D

I am proud of my asexuality because is a part of me!! is something that affects the way i see people and for obvious reasons my relationships and trying to hide it or change will only lead me to be miserable

through my whole life i experienced things differently when it comes to attraction to people, i never seemed to develope crushes on my classmates or celebrities, cause i just.. didint care? to a point my mom got worried and straight up asked me if i was gay because my lack of interest "was not normal"

when i was in my first long term relationship my lack of sexual needs and desire was a huge issue that would lead on fights very often and my former partner to feel unloved as i would prefer just to cuddle or watch a movie. This back and foward with him and constant fights made me feel like efectibly was somethign wrong with me and transformed sex more of a chore than something im supposed to enjoy or want

thing which developed a huge sexual trauma on me but also helped me to understand that, that relationship would never work because i just could never deliver what he wanted and his needs were different than mine. we were just hurting each other

i also got sent to doctors by my mother as to find what was "wrong" with me as my lack of sexual needs was not "normal" for her

there is so much i had to deal and endure my whole adulthood because of this, because i experience thigns differently

now. more big and more mature i can confidently say, im asexual. I celebrate my asexuality because There was nothign wrong with me and the way i experience thigns is just different

i celebrate it and i mention it as an important part of myself because i know i will not be able to be in a fullfiling relationship if my partner is not aware of this fact or not willing to accept it

i celebrate it because doctors didnt found anything wrong in me and i just love differently. and asuming that lack of sexual attraction is part of an illness hurts people who might be dealing with this feelings!

I celebrate because in a hyper sexualized world i dont really seem to fit in, AND THAT IS OKAY, because the way i live my life should not affect others and they way they live theirs

i do feel romantic attraction! i can fall in love and love other person!! but i just cant deliver what most people would be expect in a relationship and that is okay!

And finally i celebrate to ensure online that the people who experience love differently just like me are not alone in this journey and will be okay :3. just a lil bit of emotional support for who might feel broken due what others say to them

I apologize if i repeat myself or i wronte something wrong as english is not my main language

have a good day!

[rzyraffek]

I have a little smut request, if you don't like or don't want to write I understand that's alright.

When slashers are take a shower then S/O suddenly get in

Bo please must have him, I love this man too much, and Vincent, Lester, Brahms, Thomas, or other slashers you want to write. (or you think I pick too much you can pick some, but please Bo must thank you so much❤️)

I just think this will be fun

Oh, btw, I very love your work so perfect so wonderful so amazing❤️❤️❤️

Yall really love Sinclair's😭😭 ALSO THANK YOU V MUCH IM GLAD YALL ENJOY MY BLOG!!!! Before you read that I need to remind yall that I DONT USUALLY WRITE NSFW STUFF SO DONT EXPECT ANYTHING GREAT HERE!! Request open

Nsfw, but nothing too detailed, they/them pronouns for s/o

Shower zegz with slashers

Bo Sinclair

Our guy will make sure that they will remember that shower for long time

Yknow when you just vibe in shower and you accidently touch cold wall with your back and get all cold and upset? Yeah if s/o has the same problem.. too bad he doenst care they are getting pinned to that wall in seconds anyways

He loves seeing their face, how they react to his actions and words, how their body moves because of him

Will comment A LOT, expect a lot of praising, some cruse words and alot of growls tbh

He marks them 100% one way or another. Bite marks, Hickeys ( alot of them), ect

Afterwards he gonna bring them a towel and make sure they can go to bedroom and rest there for a while. This guy isn't the best at aftercare but he isn't heartless!

Vincent

No bcs he will blush sososo hard😨😳

Like they have to make first move cuz this guy will just stand there awkwardly looking like he has stick up his ass

He gonna be so gentle with them💖 carefully grabbing their hips/hair and enjoying the view moment

Tbh he loves grabbing their hair and vice versa, if s/o is touchy he gonna be sosos blushy

Also afterward he gonna wash their hair probably🥰 making sure they at least get out of this shower clean lol

Brahms Heelshire

Nah bcs this guy will be the one to actually pull them into shower, like s/o was just vibing doing their skincare routine and this guy just grabbed them and yeeted them into shower

He gonna act like he just wants to spent time together🙄🙄 yeah totally

Pls make sure that s/o calls him good boi or he gonna bite them

Also ngl he probably looks sexy asf with wet hair

Incredibly affectionate, yall will be extremely close to each other for the whole thing. And expect him to wisper and growl into s/o year

Thomas Hewitt

This babi will be soso confused??? Like???? Oh you wanna shower together?? Yeah sure ig I don't mind???

Again s/o has to do first move cuz he won't even think about asking them about that type of stuff! Hes a gentleman he would neverr.. unless they ask him ofc

S/o gonna forgor how to walk for few hours at least

He just gonna pick them up and pin them to wall like s/o weights nothing (tbh it doesnt really matter how much they weight this guy picked up adult men and whooped other one at the same time without any struggle, really dont worry)

He cant really tell them how he feels so he just gonna gently pat them or nuzzle them.

He will feel bad afterwards when their legs shake or when they can't really walk 😓

Micheal Myers

Tbh the only reason he showed was bcs they promised him that he will get reward later. Fr this guy stinks

Sex with him is incredibly akward. He doenst make any noise nor shows any kind of affection? Maybe he gonna carry them to bed afterwards or bring them towel?? Like this guy never heard about aftercare, or care overall tbh

He will never show it but he loves when s/o gives him affection or tells him nice words, how good he is and how great his doing his job rn

Not my proudest one! I really suck at nsfw stuff sorry😓😓 also I had nightmare and there was Bo for some reason ?? But he had heavy cowboy-texas accent ??? Idk why. Anyways its 2am yall have great rest of day

This post was made by asexual gang, like and subscribe to join asexual gang

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am I (27m) the asshole for wanting my boyfriend (28m) to be attracted to me?

This involves sex as a topic but won't get explicit, I'll keep it vague. I'm asexual. Completely sex repulsed in a physical sense, mostly due to autistic sensory issues. I've never had any interest in sex and didn't have any libido at all before going on testosterone, so the way most allosexuals tend to view and think of sex is something I've always struggled to understand.

In previous relationships, my asexuality was handled in different ways depending on the person. One boyfriend was totally fine just not having a sexual aspect to our relationship, another one had a hookup he got my approval on. The compromise me and my last boyfriend came up with was that he'd text me his fantasies about me and that did a lot for him without me having to physically be in the situation, and even if I didn't get anything sexual out of it I did enjoy it. It was a confidence boost. I dont generally consider myself attractive or desirable, i wear sweaters in summer because im so self conscious, and this compromise actually did a lot to help me see myself in a different light.

I recently got into a new relationship and, as with every relationship I've been in, there's inevitably a discussion about how we're going to compromise on this issue. My new boyfriend didn't know anything about asexuality and barely understood when I explained but he's very insistent about not crossing my boundaries, which I appreciate. But the problem is, since he'd never considered sexuality from a less direct angle, he didn't really know where to even start with ideas when we were trying to work out a compromise. So, I started making suggestions, thinking back to what worked for other people I'd dated. Just abstaining wasn't going to be doable for him so I didn't suggest it, and he wouldn't be comfortable with a hookup.

I remembered my ex used to be able to get something out of telling me about his fantasies so I asked if that was something he'd be into. I wasn't angling to try to get him to agree to something, I genuinely just wanted to know whether or not that was an option to consider. He didn't actually answer at first, he went quiet and then he answered the question with another question and asked "wouldn't something like that make you uncomfortable?" And I said "no, because the physical component is the thing I have issues with, not the subject matter itself. So long as I don't have to directly engage in the situation, I'm golden."

I don't know if this is something that was really stupid of me to say and my autistic ass just didn't realize, but since he's so careful about my boundaries and comfort and tends to fret, I thought his problem in the moment was worry that I'd be making myself uncomfortable in an attempt to meet his needs. So I hurried to reassure him and said not only would it not make me uncomfortable, I'd enjoy it in a way. Not sexually, but I enjoy knowing that my partner is attracted to me. It makes me feel good about myself.

He got really upset. He doesn’t get upset easily and hadn't ever gotten properly upset with me before (at least not to this extent) so I was very taken aback, but I was floored by his reason for being upset. Not word for word, but he essentially said "so basically you want me to frustrate myself to feed your ego?"

I was, I think understandably, completely fucking appalled by such a suggestion. I said of course not, I was just suggesting something I knew worked for someone else because even if it wasn't his thing, we could narrow down options by process of elimination. Which made logical sense, to me. He wasn't calmed though, he started saying things like "so, you want your partner to be attracted to you even though you never plan on actually letting them act on that attraction? Do you see how cruel that is?" And... I don’t know, which is why I'm submitting this here. Is that cruel?

From my perspective, I would think it's only natural to want to know your partner finds you attractive, doesn't everyone want to be wanted to some degree? I don't get some sort of sadistic thrill out of it as he seemed to be implying, and I don't want it to impact my partners in a negative way. If this was something he would find frustrating then no, of course I wouldn't want him to frustrate himself, we could look at other options. When I made the suggestion, I figured the worst that would happen was he'd say no and we'd narrow down the list of options. I never imagined my moral character would be called into question.

He's usually so, so nice to me and it hit really hard for someone who’s usually so fond of me to say I sounded selfish and vain. Both actual words he used when this devolved into an argument. I explained my reasoning for suggesting it to begin with but he said the issue isn’t the suggestion, it's that he thinks that it's fucked up of me to want my partner to be attracted to me when I'm not going to indulge that attraction and it makes him wonder if I'm really a different, worse person deep down and he's only now getting to see it. He called it a red flag. That seemed like such a leap to me but I don't want to dismiss the suggestion out of hand. Many bad people think they're good people, so it's not out of the question.

This was our first real argument, previous disagreements had been talked out very calmly but emotions ran high with this one. I dont know if this is something that triggered him for deeper reasons, considering his reaction was so intensely out of the norm for him, or if the whole thing just looks entirely different from the perspective of someone who isn't sex repulsed.

Am I the asshole here? Is it really as fucked up as he says that I enjoy knowing my partner is attracted to me even though I won't agree to have sex with them?

We didn't discuss the topic any more that night, and it hasn't been brought up since. He hasn't been treating me differently than before, but he's always proactively apologized before when he was in the wrong about things and he hasn't this time, so to me that says he still stands by what he said. His words have stuck with me and they’re eating at me. I feel like such a horrible person, and I have no idea if I should feel more or less guilty about this.

Tl;dr: my boyfriend is upset that I like knowing my partners are attracted to me even though I don't want to and don't intend to have sex with them bc he thinks that's majorly fucked up and a red flag.

What are these acronyms?

[yuri-for-businesswomen]

i met with a good friend yesterday and it was really nice but something is bothering me and i wish it didnt.

so she has started to call herself a „queer feminist“. she kept talking about „queer“ this and „queer“ that and at some point talked about reading a „queer“ book. thats when i interjected and said what does queer mean? this tells me nothing. is it about a trans male experience, about a lesbian woman, this doesnt mean anything (turned out to be about a bisexual woman which is why she related which she probably wouldnt have if it was about a different type of „queer“ person). so i go on saying thats why i find the term useless. she says she finds it a useful umbrella term and i say umbrella for what? she says „what if for example a woman dates a nonbinary person?“ im like well it depends if the person is male or female since sexuality is still based on sex. what do i as a bisexual woman have in common with a straight man who thinks he‘s a woman? i dont see us as part of the same group. and while she wasnt able to explain the usefulness of the term she said she would keep using it. out of principle i guess.

and it frustrates me because she like many other women is an intelligent and reflected woman whose opinion matters to me but she seems to mindlessly parrot whats popular right now which makes me take her opinion on feminism a lot less serious. how are you a feminist but you think one can identify in and out of womanhood? who are womens rights for then? people who identify as women or people who are women? at the end of the day, if you think women can stop being women under certain conditions, i just dont know how you are helping the liberation of women.

i just cant take people seriously who earnestly use nothing terms like „queer“ and „nonbinary“ and who think me an extremist for not pretending the person we both know is a woman is a „nonbinary person“. it doesnt seem like she has thought about why its predominantly women identifying as nonbinary, and what background these people have (we live in a very liberal city and shes doing her masters in a program and at a university that is breathing queer theory). its like a virus, smart women suddenly regurgitating and internalising all this seemingly without ever considering the implications and consequences. and it creates a distance between women like my friend and i who definitely share a value system but i refuse to pretend and just accept.

she doesnt even know theres many lesbian, gay, bisexual and even trans people who dont consider themselves „queer“. „queer“ is its own community and NOT an umbrella term for same sex attracted or gender dysphoric people (who are already not a coherent group). depending who you ask, asexuals and intersex people are also included. which basically makes „queer“ another term for „different“ (which is its original meaning completely lost here because we are in germany and only use queer in this context).

and since we had debates in the past i already know where it will go when we talk about it. she considers me to be extreme anyways so we will start with her wanting to reject my opinion. it will end with her saying „i cant argue with that (my arguments) but i still disagree“ because its so scary to start questioning all that while youre in these super „queer“ environments.

[butchtwinkimp]

MINORS DNI!!!

im not marking this post as nsfw, but I will be talking about sex and orgasms in relation to transness in this post. Minors DNI, you will be blocked. Anyone else reading this keep in mind I will be using language that my sexual partners and I use to describe our own personal sexual activities. If anything in this post is phrased weirdly or in a way you deem offensive- remember that this post is not about you or your experiences (I would still like to hear about your experiences if you think it would contribute to the conversation). Thank you. ———————————

Are there any other transmascs out there that have had problems with orgasms pre and post transition?? Just came across a post from a transfem talking about how different orgasms are for them now, with many other trans fems agreeing in the replies/reblogs. My fiancé is a trans woman and she has shared with me (as well as me just being there to witness it lol) how different and powerful her “girl orgasms” are. And like,,, im so happy for you all but damn 😭 im so fucking jealous.

In the post i am referring to the OP also talked about how her orgasms feel very similar to how cis lesbians describe”the female orgasm”, kind of an all over the body feeling that leaves you wanting more. Ive now listened to both cis and trans women (&fems) alike describe the earth shattering experience of having an orgasm, and im honestly kind of upset that I will probably never know what that feels like 😔

Before I started T, it was incredibly hard for me to ever come, for a very long time I was convinced I just couldn’t. I had managed to do it a few times, either from masturbation or from veeeerrryyy specific sex positions (me on top) and everytime it required clitoral stimulation. But even when I could reach an orgasm, its was never that same magical experience I had heard so many women describe. It was like i could only feel the pressure building up, with no pleasurable release. “Coming” for me was just going until my clit was too sensitive to continue, but it never felt like a wave of release washing over my body, just sudden overstimulation.

When my gf started medically transitioning and she first started having “girl orgasms”, i remember her crying and going “holy shit is this what its like?! I never wanna stop!!” And while of course im very happy for her and its fun to get her in that state, I cant help but feel jealous and betrayed by my own body lmao.

i was hoping going on T would “fix” me, and dont get me wrong T has genuinely changed so much about my sex life (as an example I no longer identify as someone on the asexual spectrum! I am constantly horny as fuck!!) but im starting to think my body is just broken. I can come a lot easier now, and ive had maybe one or two orgasms in the 7 months ive been on T that genuinely left me satisfied. Mostly its just… the same. Its a little bit easier for me to orgasm now but they still arent particularly mind blowing, mostly just overstimulating. And i cant help but feel… cheated? By my own body?

Ive listened to so many trans people go on about how hormones drastically improved their sex life, and while it did somewhat improve mine, I feel like I got robbed of a greater experience. Im so happy for everyone finally feeling right and comfortable in their sex lives but damn it really feels like I got left behind sometimes 😔

I am friends with more trans fem people than trans mascs, so usually Im hearing the same story of how much better orgasms have become, so I am curious of how HRT has affected other trans mascs and mens sex lives. Am I the only one perpetually disappointed in my own body or is this a somewhat common experience for people with vaginas? Please dont be afraid to tell me about your own experiences in the replies/reblogs, I am open to hearing from everyone, not just other transmascs :)

[cipherdragon]

yeah so i got some isat theories

take note i’m only on arc three + i don’t plan to spoil anything for myself SO DONT TELL ME IF IM RIGHT OR WRONG PLEASE <3

i did accidentally check the isat tag on both here and ao3 so i got possible spoilers which influence the headcanons but whatever

if none of this is right feel free to make this an au bahahha

anyway this went from theories to just me rambling lmao

i’m sorry

loop and the king are probably a part of siffrin

“refer to me with the royal we” loop uses they them and jokingly(?) says to use “we”

king literally has sifs hair bruhhhh

“do you remember?” all three are not from vaugarde

the island north of vaugarde people don’t remember its existence. sif cannot recall where he’s from. HMMM…

reoccurring books sif cannot read. refer to island north of vaungard theory

sif uses he they and this may be a stretch but king uses he/him and loop uses they/them so sif took the pronouns in the divorce (not a literal divorce)

so i’m guessing siffrin, once you basically wear the poor guy down from looping 100+ times because you’re trying to make everyone happy, just GIVES UP and goes “yeah let’s freeze my friends in time THATS GONNA MAKE THEM HAPPY FOREEEEVER :D” but he’s too far gone to realize “wait wait wait no no that’s WRONG” (get this man some therapy istg)

also i think sif is aroace or at LEAST just ace. “yeahh i don’t like the idea of doing things with people in that way” in regards of mira saying she doesn’t want to fuck people during her quest-to-learn-what-is-upsetting-the-poor-girl

mirabell is cisgender aromantic asexual. one of the younger ones. doesn’t really give off any exact age but def 20smthn. they all are except for dile and bonbon.

isabeau is gay transgender (he says he “changed” and he doesn’t use his old name. mood lol) (i swear changing is just hrt but better) - prolly mid 20s

odile just doesn’t care what she identifies as (at least this is what it feels like) but i’m pretty sure she’s cis. she’s deffo in her fourties. or late thirties. gonna get wacked in the face with her book for sure.

bonnie is nonbinary (i don’t got much for the kid) prob 11 or 12

siffrin. oh siffrin. he’s a guy, but he could be nonbinary. he’s def ace to me, but in the “haha i make funny sex jokes while ace” way. maybe he feels romantic feelings. maybe he doesn’t. he doesn’t have time to figure that out. it would be funny if sif was 18 but nah sif’s likely 21-23 (idk the legal age for the world of isat. i GUESS it’s 20? or 21) (sif is an adult, that much is obvious.)

loop? loop doesn’t care. they’re whatever you think they are. they’ll laugh if they think your guess is funny, but honestly they just don’t care. “loop is gay” “loop’s a lesbian” “loops a genderqueer asshole who siffrin REALLY wants to punch in the face” loop’s everything and nothing woooo magic star glitter everywhere (sorry) (loop has no age cuz they’re a star)

sif’s not attracted to isa. isa is attracted to sif. poor siffrin hates how he can’t reciprocate isa’s feelings. he’s worried he’ll upset isa by telling him he doesn’t see isabeau that way. he keeps looping over and over to try to get isa to say he loves sif, sif tries to get the courage to say it back, despite it not being true.

and odile slowly figures out sif’s secret about the loops each loop, but they loop back before she can bring it up to sif.

aight i think that’s everything. i got over 30 hours in this game on my switch and i think some of that is a weird glitch because surely i haven’t been playing that much??? i think it managed to keep adding numbers even when my switch was off. hmmmm.

[tonyisdead-02]

Coming to terms with my asexuality.

I've always love romance in any shape or form, childhood friends whose hangouts turn into dates and their friendship bracelets now have a different meaning, elderly couples spending whatever time they have left with each other, a middle age person falling in love with another and feeling like a teenager again, coworkers who are too shy to confess but they take extra hours just to be close to the other. People holding hands and staring at each other like they are infinite, it makes my heart fuzzy the way they just drown in their embrace, melting away in warmth, love, longing...

...And desire, and just like that the fantasy dies for me.

A lot of this stories have at least one mention of the couple having sex, even if it's not explicit it's still there, like them kissing in the hallway after a fun date, almost devouring their mouths, they enter the room and the scene fades to black. They didn't show anything but we all know what happened.

The moment you get old enough to experience puberty the adults (sometimes people your age also do it but it's especially the adults) won't stop talking about how you're gonna have a partner, how you're gonna go in dates and parties were teenagers make out in the couch or have sex whenever they can, your parents might even forbid you close the door when someone your age comes over because what are two teenagers in a room going to do if not have sex?

I'm not saying it's not important to have this conversations, after all teenagers do have sex and some of them talk about it like their lives depend on it.

It's just kinda painful to hear.

Sitting in lunch and hearing your classmates talk about things they did with their partners and how they love each other so much they sneak out to kiss, going to a party with friends and trying to ignore couples making out in every corner, people your age talking about how they thought they didn't like sex until they tried and now they love it, some even say if you dont have sex then what you have is no different than friendship. You can't just go home and scape because your family starts bothering you saying things like "Do you like someone?" "You know you can talk to me about this stuff" "I was your age, I know what teenagers do" "Boys only want one thing"

And if you do talk to them about not wanting to have sex or how you just don't feel it, they start saying you're a late bloomer, how everyone feels it eventually and it's only natural to do it, or how they want grandkids and can't wait to experience that with you.

I try to scape to fantasy but even there sex is a big deal, the lovers have sex as an ultimate act of love, the lovers won't see each other for a very long time so they have sex, the lovers go to a hotel after a beautiful wedding and have sex, or there's stories about how one of them feels miserable for not having sex so they have an affair and falls in love with the affair partner.

No matter where I look, sex is there.

So when everyone around you talks about how this is extremely important and you don't feel the need to do it, you start to feel very lonely.

But how can it be posible? I read about sex, even tho I don't do it to satisfy something other than curiosity, I do it like I'm a scientist studying the behavior of a strange species and I draw sex like it's something beautiful yet only exists in fiction.

I know myself, I know the mere thought of someone being so close it's gross and scary and just impossible, I know I don't experience those "butterflies" or that tingling sensation people describe, yet I crave it, not because I actually want to do it, but because if that's supposed to be the ultimate act of love then how would I ever experience love if I don't do it? Yes I know that's not exactly true and casual sex exist, but still at least they have it. Why does it feel so wrong not being able to feel it?

How can I yearn for something so desperately yet despise it so much?

[quillkiller]

some Tom riddle headcanons pls!!!

have been discussing with my royal consort kara @sugarsnappeases and the results are in..

he’s terrified of death. of dying. to the point where he’s entirely obsessed with death. his mon died in childbirth, it’s the first thing he ever knew!!!!! death !!!!!! his life has been marked with death since his birth, sending him into this obsessive spiral of becoming immortal

and then he finds out he’s a wizard. magical. there’s MAGIC !!!!! surely there’s eternal life if there’s magic. like in fairytales, in the storybooks, etc. but nope :/ wizards also die it TURNS OUT ..

and the interesting thing about this is that he does die young. according to me (and kara) because voldemort kills tom riddle, but tom riddle also created voldemort on purpose. he’s so obsessively terrified of death that he doesn’t even realise he all but kills himself. this not to say that he kills any good parts he ever had, because he wasn’t a good person. he was willing to do anything to become immortal and that included becoming a fanatic pureblood supremacist <- which he was before he became voldy. so this is not like. excusing canon tom behaviour, it’s simply exploring his character and motivations…… so yeah, he ends up killing himself anyway. becomes this snake like ugly monstrous creature because he cares more about living forever than he cares about luxury or good looks or sex or love <- perverse asexual freak. will he be happy living forever? lonely? content? satisfied? <- things he has never once considered because the Only Point is living forever / and his small minded god-complex making sure he Will

speaking of small minded god-complex. he grows up in this orphanage right.. he’s this lonely unfortunate miserable bitter boy and then someone comes to tell him he’s a wizard. who WOULDNT feel like The Chosen One in that situation. and he just never comprehends that he’s simply not. that he’s just one of many wizards before him. just one of many with a traumatic childhood. but he thinks he’s special and him being a wizard is Proof of this. feeding into his small minded god-complex that makes him hate muggles. he was miserable in the muggle world, treated terribly, unfortunate and unhappy, so he hates them all. they’re all inferior and could never do what he can. will never be understand and will never be special. <- again, not tom excuses, but tom exploring. this is us exploring the WHY and HOW of his character and NOT ! agreeing with any of them shdhfjjsk. but yeah. small minded kid with a god-complex whose entire life has been clouded with his obsessive fear of death/immortality that there just simply isn’t any other point of view for him. and it makes him the monster he becomes

myrtles death!!!!!!! was an accident. that he capitalized off of. a girl ends up dead and well now there’s a dead body in front of you and you’ve read about horcruxes and you want to live forever. sort of like robbing a corpse. he’s not morally above exploiting someones dead body for his own gain. his entire life revolves around his own goals and ideas and obsessions. did we mention the god-complex… i dont even think he feels bad for myrtle, or see almost anyone ever as a real person (<- sociopath), but rather congratulates himself for the lucky break.. he needed a dead body, has probably been making a pro and con list of who his first kill should be for months, and now there’s an accidental death around him. he’s doing a happy little dance

^ this made me giggle. did you all know kara is the funniest person in the world

the older generation of purebloods HATE him at first. like walburga, orion, cygnys, etc etc etc. like they’re older than him, by a LOT even if toms also older than their children, and he comes this almost still a teenage kid trying to convert them for his Cause. they’re literally laughing in his face and mocking him. unbelievably unimpressed…. however tom doesn’t give up, genuinely probably unfazed by obstacle because of his tunnel vision. he starts off recruiting less important pureblood families. like the flints. until he gets his claws into peoples children…. that’s when it all starts getting really fucking serious…. when he starts getting successful… creating this little death eater cult built from scratch and made-up by teenagers. reg having the voldy posters in his room, huge argument against the ’uwu reg didnt want to take the mark’ and also WAY more interesting if he’s the one getting his parents recruited rather than the other way around. then there’s barty ’daddy issues’ crouch being picked up and recruited by an older male figure type leader, evan rosier the morally bankrupt kid with necrophilic tendencies who can’t get or keep a job after hogwarts because of intentional malpractice for his own anatomical research ……

so yeah….. some tom riddle thoughts… <3

[the-s1lly-corner]

Which of the creepypastas would be okay with an asexual s/o?

Creepypastas w/ an ace!reader!

yahoo!! sorry for taking so long to get to this!! i kinda had a small lil slump for a few days but im back!! sorry for any typos or if these seem... bllluguuguh!!! im still trying to get through that lil slump so my brains still a lil... boo!!! obligatory these are with characters that i think would be compatible with an ace reader so this isnt going to follow my base/go to list of characters! a lot of these are going to dip into admins experience as someone on the ace spectrum (asexual/aegosexual!) reader is written as vague ace identity but like. mostly involved to be ace. admittedly this leans more into most of this being ace hcs since i think for the most part they dont care/dont find issue with your identity

Characters: Slenderman, Trenderman, Eyeless Jack, Masky

CWs: mentions of sex but like. nothing too bad mostly just vague sex drives and that sort of thing, really!

Slenderman;

honestly i think he might be on the ace spectrum, or maybe thats because i dont think he really knows what sex /is/

okay well he does know what it is but he only understands it on a surface level, but otherwise he doesnt really care much for it in an everyday setting

yeah i think hes on the spectrum; i also think he might be on the aro spectrum!

only really initiates intimacy if you want it (reminder that not all aces dont have sex! attraction stuff is the main thing) but otherwise i would write him the same way as i do with a non-asexual reader!

extra headannon since his is kinda short but really hes probably the most supportive out of any creepypasta simply because i like to write him as this entity that doesnt interact much with others but is still. curious. this man does not know what lgbtphobia is (and thinks its dumb when he does find out!)

Trenderman;

very similar with slenderman but more in tuned with identity stuff and things like that

personally i hc him to be greysexual, or demisexual! i think trender is like. the only one out of the 3 brothers (that i claim) that i dont see being ready to get down and dirty? like unlike slender he KNOWS what it is and understands attraction and all that but just doesnt. feel it

so he gets it! he interacts with people more than slender but like. not openly, i mean like not as himsef?! this is kind of a side tangent but i like to think that slender beings can create false human bodies and trender is the main one who uses it

anyways! im kind of getting off topic

he understands the stigma and hate ace people can get so out of the four characters today i think he would be the most likely to offer an ear when youre getting flack

i wish i had more for trender as well but this is genuinely the first time ive written for him so im still all OWOWOOOUGH!! with how i wanna portray him

speaking of i need to do like a catch up post for him, and some other characters so i might do that soon^^

Eyeless Jack;

okay so! the two above characters are fine with it because theyre on the spectrum above but i feel like eyeless jack just outright doesnt care if your ace or not since he has a fairly low sex drive 99% of the time

sappy man, one of those "i prefer people based on their personality rather than their looks" but not in the "im so deep for this and im lying through my teeth" way i (personally) see people say (school was ROUGH man) but in a "im literally turning into a monster my skin is fucking blue and starting to rot i have no place to say anything" way

anyways

he adores you so so much and he really feels like he doesnt deserve you, bro could not care

probably tries to find flowers around his cabin that make up the ace flag/which ever flag you use

though im not sure how many grey flowers there are... hes trying his best!

Masky;

similar to eyeless jack he has a low sex drive imo so it isnt too much of a big deal to him, plus i think hes graysexual? at least i feel like he would if he knew about the label

i think asides slender and trender, he doesnt know much about this sort of thing so youre probably going to explain it to him

he mostly gets it! he gets things mixed up but hes trying his best!

overall supportive bf!! probably steals a pride pin from somewhere (dont ask)

imagine he grabs the wrong pin/j

wweoeoeohh! i hope this post is okay! admittedly i wasnt sure how this was going to turn out since, as stated above, i feel that a lot of the characters wouldnt mind/are on the spectrum themselves im not gonna lie this couldve been better but im so out of it rn that my brain is all scattered n stuff :( regardless i hope this is sufficient, and once again im so sorry for the wait TToTT

[asiancuckcake]

My wife Hannah was a strong-willed, independent & domineering white woman. For most of our relationship, I kept quiet and made sure she was happy, it wasn’t worth the hassle and I got to live my own life peacefully. Over the last few months her behaviour became more obnoxious as she started to criticise and emasculate me in front of our friends. She would openly say I was Asexual because i didnt want to have sex with her. all the while telling them she was married to a boring old man. I laughed it off in public, but it was clearly a difficult and unpleasant situation. Still, I plodded on regardless and kept my counsel while she told me of all the young studs at her office, how they looked at her, spoke to her…..even flirted with her. I doubted it as she was...basic, reaĺly. I would come to find out most all white 'wo-men' are. I shrugged it off and said that I would be going out tonight, perhaps if she wanted to invite one of her young lads over, then she could. That seemed to enrage her and I smirked with self satisfaction as I headed out. A few days passed and her behaviour got worse, when we went out, she openly referred to me as Asexual....because i didnt want to have sex with her. Then kept asking if I knew what it meant…….I still kept calm andgood-natured, and I started spending my evenings out. My wife confronted me and demanded to know what I was doing, when I told her I was having an affair with a younger woman, she looked at me and burst into hysterical laughter. Several minutes of guffawing then she sneered at me. She was insecure around Asian Women, and actually told me - "Go ahead...get yourself an Asian Girl! See if she treats you better." I wasn’t worth anything to her, and in her covert narcissistic way, she felt there was nothing I could do about it. She wanted to play the victim. My younger girlfriend, who just HAPPENED  to be Asian, said "let your wife play the victim. I can help with that!"  My wife thought there was nothing I could do and indeed, I didn't. BUT my gf said there was something  she WOULD do...I just didn't know what. The weekend was quiet, serene and love was in the air. You see, I wasn’t lying. Gorgeous young Akiko was intelligent, kind and truth be told, had a wild side. As I was preparing dinner, she asked me to come up to the attic and see what she had done for me. The scene was perfect…..my bitch of a wife, naked, bound and severely gagged. The loose rope tied around her neck, held to the beams in her room. Her green eyes, red from the tears and the stinging lashes that Akiko had delivered. Her flabby tits clamped with cruel clothes pegs. The electrical tape was wound tightly over her head and under the chin, as well as over her mouth. A layer of microfoam tape held her sodden panties in her harsh mouth. Akiko made it clear she baited my wife to come to her place with some texts using both my phone and her own. All she said she had to do was leave the front door open a crack and the "stupid fugly white bitch" couldnt resist "catching" me in the act she said. Akiko said, "She came to see something  she thought woulf happen. I dont think we should disappoint her. She's a closet cuck after all anyhow. She confessed." Akiko asked if I like what I saw, as she stroked my cock through my trousers. My wife whined, seeing how objectively gorgeous Akiko was, and by comparison,  she made my wife look like a trans-man. As I got hard and I told her, "I took your advice". When Akiko unzipped my trousers and knelt down to mount me, my wife started to sob. Akiko spoke before I could actually & told her sternly her not to cry, she was still my wife - for the moment - but things would be different. Especially as Akiko later presented her with the new bridle gag & collar. In time, my white wife would be released to carry out the chores - in BOTH homes……household harmony was vital after all. 

[theonlymadmanonmars]

Hey! Another aroace here!. QPR Alastor is Life. I as an aroace do no feel romantic love but the love I feel platonically is incredibly strong. Just as strong as any romantic feeling, just different. An Aroace can do stuff that is considered romantic too. Like kisses for example. Or cuddling. As asexuals can have sex. Asexuality and aromanticsm is not feeling the attraction. That doesnt mean you have to hate or dont want x or y. Every Aroace is a bit different since its an expectrum. Dont be discouraged of a ship because the character is Aroace. Sometimes that just makes It more interesting. Being Aroace is just another thing, not your whole personality.

For Alastor? Maybe he can be repulsed by all or maybe as his friend said "he is a Big Kitty" he can really like certain things but do not see them as romantic or dont care about It. You get me?. :) I would love to see more people play with the idea that is an spectrum. A lot of people once they Discover someone is Aroace automatically they think about a person dont wanting anything to do with anything It feels like they faked their love for them or involvement. Its not like that.

So just have fun!

While being AroAce is a spectrum,(I personally don't want Sex or Romance but My brother is Demiromantic and I know many other AroAce people who do want relationships) and I agree it makes a lot of ships and such more interesting.

However I've also seen a lot of people using that as an excuse to just completely erase his identity.

Of course people can and really should have fun shipping Alastor, it's also important to acknowledge his identity within your shipping, and explore how he feels about romance.

No hate at all to you and I totally agree with everything you said, I just wanted to clarify that this post was for those who erase his identity completely.

[boba-tea-addict-1004]

🔥Coming out to Rengoku as Asexual🔥

Asexual Reader x Rengoku Kyojuro

A/N: I wanted to make this for the final day of Asexual awareness week 2023

To all my fellow A-spec people you are loved and worthy 🖤🤍💜

⚠TW: Minor Sexual themes (nothing graphic and has to do with the last trigger), Internal Aphobia and Allo Passing⚠

You and Kyojuro were close... so close... everyone expected you two to get married. you and Kyojuro tried to shake it off, but you just couldn't. the both of you ended up getting into courtship, but it was mainly just you trying to get the others off your back and to an extent maybe it was to give them what they wanted.

you were different.

you couldn't really relate to Mitsuri or Tengan when they brought up the topic of attraction and sex. hell, there was a part of you that felt minorly repulsed by it. when you told them a few times that you weren't into it they sort of made a face. one of confusion. from that point on you felt isolated, not only that you just felt like you weren't meeting whatever criteria there was for what was considered 'basic human emotions'

maybe that's one reason why you chose kyojuro as your guineapig. he never pushed that on you and just respected whatever boundaries you gave him.. the idea of kissing him alone wasn't terrible.

you talked about it with him and you though maybe you should just rip off the band-aid and be done with it. but when the time came you just backed out swiftly. before either of you did anything you just put your clothes back on and went back to your estate.

Kyo didn't mind he just was more concerned about you.

you kept a certain distance in your time together since you two became official..

he didn't want to lose you...

***

"Y/n.." Kyojuro knocked. you been inside for over a week and every other time a hashira has come to see you they were met with cold dead silence. "Y/n.. can we talk... please.." right when kyo was about to leave on the other side of the door you responded

"your- not mad.."

"Why would i be mad?"

"..i mean.. about.. the other day.."

"oh... no not at all" he assured "I'm just more worried about you.."

"..."

"may i come in?"

you open the door, your face stained with tears and your uniform was wrinkled. as he stepped inside he saw there was dust starting to build up. "if.. if we're moving to fast i could-"

"kyo... i'm sorry... but... i dont want to keep going with this.."

"y/n?.." he sat down at the table.

the moment you sat down in front of him you sighed "something.. is... wrong.. with me.."

he listened letting you go on

"i don't know how to explain it but... i don't feel the things that mitsuri and Tengan describe. none of the other's feel this way so there has to be something i'm missing. i thought that if i spent enough time with you i'd feel those things eventually but i cant... people tell me i just need to wait for the right person to come along but... i waited my entire life and .... nothing." you sigh "i'm broken...."

Kyo was stunned. not that you couldn't feel that type of attraction but that you tried to keep all this in and even force yourself to do things simply because that's what was expected. it hurt him to see you like this..

"what if.. there is no right person..." you clench your fist and look down "what if... I'm alone forever..."

he quickly goes to your side and hugs you "no.. no your not broken..." he continued to hold you close and stroke your hair. "human.. we never are whole by anything.. money.. fame.. power.. so something like that couldn't make you whole to begin with... how can you be broken if something like intimacy couldn't even make uzui or mitsuri whole to begin with"

you look into his eyes and saw nothing but pure honesty

"and you will never be alone.. not ever.. not if you have me and are surrounded by people who will love and respect you the way you are."

you smile wiping a few tears "kyo.."

he pats your head "you are perfect the way you are... and anyone who cares enough to know the real you will see that"

you chuckle then after a bit think "...hey... want to try again. i know it's not 'traditional' but ... could we be together still... without any of the romance or ... sex?"

kyo nodded "that's okay... if I'm honest i personally liked us better as friends anyway"

"Really?"

he nods "so... does that mean we're... super best friends or something?"

"I'm not sure... we can work out the details later"

he smiled ruffling your hair

***

In weeks since you and Kyo told the others, about your feelings and shinobu actually has a name for it now. Asexual or Asexuality (derived from the scientific word of reproduction not involving the fusion of gametes.) although this was something that was new, you liked the way you felt after that, everyone understood and respected that. as for you a Kyo.. you were platonic soulmates till the end..

you never needed that to feel whole..

what made you feel whole in the end.. was true connection and understanding

Everything was fine after that and there were no missions involving trains after that...

[our-queerplatonic-experience]

I honestly don't know how to start this cause I'm awkward lol but basically: my mom thinks my close(ish?) Friend is my "boyfriend"... could not be further from the truth 💀 (also sorry this is a bit long btw i like detail & that is a pain for me to deal with sometimes. This could be catagorized as venty but this is meant to be just a bit of a mind dump)

I'm aromantic asexual (romo+sex repulsed/adverse) & bigender (boy+girl), the um- suspected "boyfriend": she's a lesbian trans woman. This has happened a couple times, ligit were that mean gay & overly nice lesbian meme & somehow A NOTABLE AMOUNT OF PEOPLE THINK WERE DATING 💀 told her like imidiatly over text just to clear anything up like if my moms weird or smth. She was just like "oh shit" & we havnt mentioned it since.

What makes it a bit awkward tho is I DO lowkey have a squish/qp crush on her, on & off, but I know that my attraction tends to fade & waver with time (like- Lithqueerplatonic / Queerplatonicflux I guess). So I wouldn't really want to be in like, a qpr w/ her. That & I've always kinda "worry" that my boy/masc part may make most lesbians uncomfortable being in a qpr with me and vice versa with gay men & my girl/ fem part.

Anyway I just have really intense platonic feelings when I do have them & I wish as a society we were more ok with expressing that ;> RELASHIONSHIP ANARCHY WHEN?? when will ppl be "allowed" to kiss their homies goodnight without it being perceived romantic?? WHEN ;D (I'm also on the aplatonic spectrum, dont have many friends & dont plan on having many. I think too many ppl overwhelm me.)

My ideal QPR would just be like: cuddling/leaning on eachother, time together, nicknames & small gifts of appreciation (inexpensive &/or handmade stuff or food), I find kissing weird as a concept so a no for that personally in general. And like, at this point... thinking out loud idk if I want to do that w/ her specifically or if I just want a qpr? Cause like I'd only feel comfortable even touching ppl I'm fairly if not really close to & she checks that box by being in my short friend list. For reference: I only started regularly hugging & saying I love you to my best friend recently & we've known eachother & been mutually eachothers best friends for a decade. (I used to occasionally question if i had qp feelings for him but I am like VERY sure it's just heavy platonic appreciation. i love him so much hes the brother i never had i fr cannot stress how much i love him hes fr fr the best bro bro not even related to the topic really i just want to say that i love tf out of him hes awsome)

Anyway plz prey/etc that I don't get weirded out by my mom so much that I come out as aroace 💀 (i find even the idea of being in a romantic/sexual relationship repusing & unconfortable to think about. Just not my thing, if that changes fine i just don't anticipate that happening. Also I don't think she's like, a "kick me out" aphobic, just an uneducated 1. I just don't want to deal w/ any of it tbh. I want a clean cut "I am [blank]" statment and for the "conversation" to be over with but I don't expect that ) tldr: wish me luck on this journey of the cringe that is existing ☺

good luck!!!!! existing do be difficult but it will be okay :]

[spicybylerpolls]

any ace spicy bylers out there?

I just saw someone saying that sexual attraction is possible for asexual people and can go like this:

'For me, it’s not really desire, but a knee- jerk reaction that I can’t control and don’t want.

My body has a mind of its own; oftentimes, my hormone-ridden brain sees something that it likes, but it’s not necessarily something that I, as an asexual person, like. It usually happens when I watch tv shows, as I don’t really get stimulated by real-world people.

Basically, my evolutionary instinct screams at me that this person I’ve seen would make a good mate, but I personally feel no sexual attraction towards them. I don’t get overwhelmed by how attractive they are, want to have sex with them, or fantasize about them. Whatever it is doesn’t last more than a second or two.

All there is to this not-desire is a fleeting moment of my body experiencing arousal, my asexual mind saying “Nope,” and then I return to whatever I was doing before, which is why I don’t think it really counts.'

can someone explain this cos it sounds to me like people are confusing the meaning of sexual desire and attraction to be something anyone controls. like, having a desire for something doesnt necessarily mean you want to want it, but rather that your body or mind simply wants it. like, desire is wanting of the first order. hopefully you are at peace with the desire (you want to want) as it makes life easier. but often, you aren't (you don't want to want = internal conflict).

it sounds like the person above is simply deeply repressed for whatever reason - there is sexual desire in their body, but they actively dont want or repress it. how can this be asexuality when some form of sexuality is present? their definition also implies that sexual people never have desires or attractions they are uncomfortable with or don't want or are confused by, which isnt true!

Please note that the purpose of this blog is not to be creepy or to make anyone uncomfortable. That's why I created the #spicy byler tag (I will tag all polls with this). If you don't want to see this blog or anything related to it on your feed, please block that tag. Not everyone is comfortable with this sorta stuff, and that's okay.