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kandyscorner · 15 days ago

Note

Sooo about that Jason smut I asked about in the comment 🫣 I am a sucker for the fake dating trope, and I am very curious about your take on this. Unfortunately I haven't found many fics like it. I usually am a lurker on tumblr, but I feel confident asking you to write one per my request. 💗

I don't have a lot in mind for the request itself, I really just want to see what you can come up with for this trope. I love your writing and Do I know you? became one of my favourites, I am so excited every saturday for it to come out!

Thank you and wishing you the best! 💗💗

I love a fake dating trope but I don't think I did it justice in this fic. It starts out a little angsty. I have no Idea why. then its a little kinky but softens up towards the end. Honestly I feel like I kept losing my footing on this one but I have been working on it a lot. I hope it works for what you want!

Warnings: Smut! Mentions of gore(super vague), choking(kind of, more just hand on throat action), little bit of a brat kink, blowjob, P in V, Let me know if there's more that I missed (I probably did)

****

“It shouldn't have happened.” Jason's harsh voice makes you flinch. The silence on the rooftop had been blissful. Especially when compared to ear ringing bass at the club you had been undercover at.

A backfired mission. Kind of. It should've been easy. Go in, scope out the place, plant a few bugs in some strategic places. Except you got caught, dragged into one of the back offices and interrogated.

They thought you belonged to some foreign gang and wouldn't believe that you weren't. The worst you got was a hard back hand to your cheek before Jason was breaking the door down.

He hauled you out of there before you could even think about getting involved in anything else.

Which brings you to now, sat on a rooftop In a skimpy club dress and Jason's jacket over your shoulders to keep out the cold air. Your cheek still stung. You could feel the tightness of a scrap no doubt from the gaudy ring the man was wearing on his hand, or had been before Jason cut it off with the man's own knife.

You knew Jason was extreme, that he could do some serious damage when he wanted to. You had seen it with your own eyes before but every time, it was a shock to your system.

Jason was sweet on you. Albeit for show, a fake boyfriend-girlfriend scenario so everyone would leave you two alone. But to watch him gently coax you across the roof only for the flip to switch threw you off.

He was shouting at Batman, a deep anger behind It. You had heard from the other bat members what he had been like when he first came back to Gotham. You heard about the pure rage that rolled off of him during that time. You think this is what it was like.

“She shouldn't have been in there,” he repeats.

“Just because your dating doesn't change the mission. She knew the risks. We all do.” Bruce says. There's a tenseness in Bruce's shoulder that you're not accustomed to. Sure, Bruce was tense, it was like his default but this was different.

“Same shit, different kid. You always want the good soldier bullshit. I'm not going to let her get killed too.” Bruce flinches at his words.

Your brows pinch, unsure about the argument and where you stand in it. It turns out you don't have the time to figure your place in it because Jason is done.

He stalks over to you and you tense, sure you're about to get your own lashing. Instead Jason's hand is on your arm, gently tugging you to the edge of the building.

“I'm taking you home,” his voice is still tight but it's much softer than when he had been talking to Bruce.

“Okay,” you mumble and let him wrap an arm around you as he pulls out his grapple. Your arms instinctually wrap around his neck and you get a glance of the Batman slumped with regret.

You don't blame Bruce. Everything He said was true. You knew the risks of the job. You just couldn't understand why Jason was so agitated about the matter. You were hardly even hurt.

It doesn't take long to get to your apartment building. Jason lets you shimmy the window open and slip in before he follows, closing and locking it behind him. He tugs his mask from his face and lets it drop to the ground.

You're about to ask him what the issue was but he's pulling you to the bathroom. A squeak escapes you when he picks you up and sets you on the bathroom counter. He doesn't even react beyond his jaw ticking as he pulls out your first aid kit.

“Jason, I'm fine,” you say gently. He pauses but ultimately ignores your words. You wince at the antiseptic against the cut on your cheek and you watch his jaw clench again.

“What's wrong?” You finally ask rather than try to placate whatever mood he was in.

Jason scoffs, “what's wrong? What's wrong? You're hurt and you could've died all under Batman's divine code.”

“It's a scrap, Jason,” you huff, “trust me, I've had a lot worse.”

Jason's hands settle on the counter on either side of your hips. You can tell he's biting his tongue and you wish he would just yell at you about being reckless. At least you'd know what he was upset about.

Instead he goes back to your cut, rubbing a healing ointment across it. You wait, thinking he'll say something, anything but you should know better than to expect that much.

“Jason,” your stern now and his angry eyes meet yours, “you cut that man's hand off.” It's a statement but the question lingers in the air. Why?

“He touched you,” he starts and you jump in.

“He didn't do anything.”

“He hit you,” he adds and you open your mouth but he talks over you, “he hurt you and he shouldn't have. He deserved to lose that hand.”

“You can drop the act,” you tell him, “you don't have to play at protective boyfriend anymore. No one's around.” You say it like a reminder in case he forgot.

“That's not what this is about,” he grumbles, pushing off the counter to lean against the wall across from you.

“Then what else could it be about?”

“He shouldn't have touched you,” he reiterated and you want to rip your hair out.

“So what? That shouldn't matter to you. It was part of the job. Shit happens and you make do.” you retort

“You don't get it do you?” Jason's voice suddenly sounds small and it tamps down your brewing anger though not entirely.

“Don’t do this, Jason,” you press a hand to your injury free cheek.

“Do what?” He sounds nearly as defeated as you feel.

“This.” You gesture between you two, “like what we have going on is reason for you to act out brashly. You didn’t have to cut off his hand, don’t use me as your reason to get violent. Our relationship is contractual. It isn’t real.”

“You really are a piece of work, aren’t you?” He scoffs at you before stepping back into your space, cornering you where you're sitting on the counter.

You're about to bite back but then he’s kissing you. Your eyes widen at the suddenness of it. It wasn’t new, you two had kissed before, all for show of course. This was different. He pulls back and looks you in the eye, hand cradling your jaw.

“Tell me if that wasn’t real.” His voice sits between a goad and a plea. It nearly makes you sick. You shake your head and pull his hand from your face.

“Don't do this, Jason,” you push him away from you and slide off the counter, “I don’t know what's wrong with you but I don’t want any part of it.” You complain as you leave the bathroom and head for your bedroom. Jason follows close behind and you can still feel the residual anger lingering off of him.

“Nothing’s wrong. Maybe I just want to be honest with you.” You outwardly scoff at the notion while you pull more comfortable clothes out for yourself.

“Just because what we have started as a deal doesn’t mean it’s not real,” he continues to argues.

“Bullshit,” you mutter under your breath.

You feel agitated with the conversation, with what he's trying to do. It hurts more than anything. He corners you against the dresser when you turn around. You glare up at him.

“Maybe,” he shrugs, “don't you want to find out.”

There's a beat of silence as you stare at each other, you in agitation and him in cocky question.

He was right, part of you wondered what it would be like if what you had was real, if you could easily cross an intimate barrier without it messing up your life.

You grab at the collar of his kevlar vest and pull him forward, pressing your lips to his.

“I'm upset,” you pull back to say before pressing back into him with heat. He takes what you give him and returns it, kissing you back hard.

His hand returns to its early spot on your jaw, tipping your head to deepen the kiss. His other hand curls around your waist to tug you against his body. He pulls back panting against your lips.

“And I'm angry. What about it?”

“What?” You forgot what you said, what had even happened. All you could think about was Jason kissing you the way he was and how he stopped.

He grins down at you and tugs softly at a strand of hair, “going dumb on me already, babe?”

“No,” you blink at him and remember that you were upset with him, “you shouldn’t call people dumb, Jason. It's mean.”

“Mean? I think you like it when I get mean,” his head dips into the crook of your neck and you're thankful for it or else he would've seen the flush on your cheeks at the way he clocked you.

Your gratitude is short lived as he starts pressing soft, sweet kisses to your neck. A hard contrast for the way you two had been kissing previously.

“Think you like it when I tell people off, tell them they can't touch what's mine. You like when I hurt them for doing it anyways.”

You shiver at the words pressed into your skin and your body slumps slightly. You can feel the hard press of his armor against you and you feel him slowly hardening up in his pants.

His knee works its way between your legs, prying them apart and he presses up. The hem of your short dress rises with it, revealing more of your thighs. His hand moves from your waist to the meat of your hip, pressing you down on his leg.

Your breath catches and your head tips back. His kissing moves down the column of your throat. When he meets the junction of your neck, he starts sucking a bruise, teething lightly at the area. A quiet sigh leaves you at the pressure.

“You're not upset with me. Right, sweetheart?” He mumbles against your skin.

You try to blink away the haze that was starting to cover your mind. You could not be this easy.

“Just because I like it doesn't make you my boyfriend.” Your words tip into a gasp as his canine digs more into your skin.

He finally pulls back to give you a predator-like grin, “no, of course not. But you want me to fuck you like I am?”

“I don't want you to do anything like your my boyfriend.” You scoff, “cause you're not actually my boyfriend.”

“Semantics,” he shakes his head at you, “So what? You want me to fuck you like a stranger then? Use you the way I want, yeah?”

You gap at his crude way he speaks but your thighs press against his and your hips shift on their own. He openly laughs at you, a dark thing that makes your body want to grind down on the thigh neutrally placed between your legs.

“Oh, I should've known,” he says lowly as his hand moves from your jaw to press against your collar, thumb swiping across your throat like a threat, or a promise, “pretty little thing like you would be a slut.”

You flush in an instant, body warming and you can feel yourself clench around nothing.

“You're such a jerk,” you say weakly before tugging him back to kiss you. It's soft like the kisses to your neck and his hands are no longer pushing or pressing. You feel confused about it.

“On your knees,” he says when he pulls back and you're startled by the demand. He must sense your surprise because his hands leave you to hover instead and his voice neutralizes, “unless you don't want to.”

You squint at him over the remark, over his actions. You were so confused. Was he angry or just horny? was he trying make this real relationship or did he want to fuck and be done?

“Jason,” you steady yourself as you say his name and his leg slips from between yours. You keep a hand on him so he doesn't bolt.

“What do you want? And please be honest with me. If you're angry with Bruce, the universe or whatever and you're trying to blow off steam, that's fine but I need you to tell me if that's what this is.”

“It's not and it is,” he starts.

“Jason,” you say his name in scold. His hands come up to hold at your arms, bordering the line between gentle and harsh.

“Let me finish, okay?” You nod in concession and he continues, “I am angry and I do wanna blow off steam but I don't actually want to just use you, sweetheart. I care about you, you hear me?”

You can hear the vulnerability in his voice, the way he wants you to understand, and you can hear the residual anger on the edge of it. You want to ask about it because you still don't know what he’s upset about. But he’s got you all worked up now.

“Don’t leave,” you tell him, “in the morning or when we're done. We have to talk about this, us. Okay?”

He hesitates and a look of surprise crosses his face, like he didn't think you would okay any of this. He nods, “Okay.”

“Promise me, Jason Todd.”

“I promise I won’t disappear,” he confirms.

“Good,” you murmur. Your hands grab his and you drag them back to where they had been before, “I like when you touch me and I like when you're a little mean. It’s okay.”

“Yeah?” He steps back close, his hands pressing firmly. You nod as he leans back in and kisses you again. It starts soft, a thank you without words but it doesn't take long for it to amp back up, tongues sliding against each other. His hand at your hips slips down to palm at your ass, pressing you against him and dragging your dress up slightly. He groans, teeth nipping at your bottom lip as he pulls away from you. He gives you a meaningful look and you tilt your head at it in question.

“On your knees,” he repeats his earlier words. He watches you instead of asking if you were okay with it this time. You smile at him and watch him visibly relax.

You nod and slowly sink down, back dragging slightly against the dresser, until you're face to face with the swelling bulge in his pants. You look up and, boy, is that a sight.

Jason stares down at you, eyes previously filled with anger slowly being filled with lust. His hands grip at the top of the dresser like he's trying to stabilize himself.

You stare at him and stare at him. He doesn't say anything, no further instruction beyond, getting on your knees. You know there's an implication of what he wants you to do, your eye level with the thing, but really he should be clearer.

You spread your knees wider and wider til they hit the edge of his boots. He finally blinks, eyes dropping to your spread legs but he still doesn't say anything.

You press your hands into your thighs, slowly dragging up. One hand moves up to your stomach and then to your boob. You squeeze at it lightly.

Your other hand slips between your legs. You palm at your own cunt and then let your fingers find your clit over the fabric of your panties.

You make a show of it, head tipping back against the dress, back arching and your hips shifting forward against your hand. You let out a sigh and close your eyes, hoping that'll goad him. You lose yourself in it for a moment, enjoying the feeling.

You freeze at the hand wrapping around your throat, nothing tight but enough that you notice. You open your eyes to find Jason squatting in front of you.

“You're such a brat,” he murmurs and it has you pressing down on your clit, another sigh leaving you.

“Am not,” you complain as his free hand pulls your hand from between your legs. He squeezes a little more at your throat and you pout at him instead of saying more.

With no more commentary from you he lets go of you and stands. He starts undoing his pants. As you watch, you let your hand. slip back between your legs.

“Don’t,” he snaps sternly and your hand pauses before it can make a landing anywhere, “hands behind your back, sweetheart. Can't trust you not to touch when you're not supposed to.”

“But-”

“Come on, be a good little brat for me and listen. If I need to punish you, I'm going to make it hurt." His words are dark and heavy and you remind yourself that he was angry. It makes your tummy flutter anyway. You listen to him, arms moving behind your back. You still pout though.

He finishes undoing his pants and then tugs them done enough for him to pull his cock out. He squeezes at the base of it and strokes up, a spurt of precum leaking out. He was thick and you could already feel the ache in your jaw.

He steps forward, trapping you back against the dresser again, towering over you. He lightly taps the pink tip of him against your lips.

“You know what I want. Be good for me, yeah?”

You slip your tongue out slightly from your lips to lick at the tip of him, the salty taste spreading there. You hear him take a shaky breath, hips shifting forward slightly.

You let him push in past your lips, mouth opening wide. You close your eyes for a moment, feeling the weight of him in your mouth. A hand combs through your hair gently and he slowly uses it to pin your head against the dresser. You open your eyes and look up at him, mouth full of him.

“There she is. Enjoying yourself?” He asks. You hum at the question. He moans quietly and slips more into your mouth. You can feel him just on the edge of your throat and you fight the urge to gag.

“Then suck. You're wet and warm but I need a little something more than that.” He tells you, hand tightening your hair before releasing entirely. He pulls back until only the tip of his cock sits in your mouth.

You tighten your lips around him and do as he asked , sucking and hollowing your cheeks. You bob your head slightly with the motion.

“Shit, that's it,” he mumbles and you're not too sure he's talking to you. You peek up to watch him. His hand holds the dresser tightly again. His other hand, you realize, hovers by your head. Your eyes track his face as you sink more of him into your mouth.

You watch him bite down on his lips, feel the twitch of his hips. Everything held back. You’d pout about it if you could. You hum around him again and his hips jump forward.

You can't fight the suddenness of it and you gag as he presses into your mouth. Your hands leave your back to clamp down on his thighs. He pulls out of your mouth and you gasp, swallowing down the gag sensation.

“Sorry, sorry. I didn't mean to.” Jason rushes out his hand slips to cradle your jaw tipping your head up, “you okay?”

You wipe at the drool on your chin and blink back the wetness in your tear line, “I'm okay, just startled me.”

“I'm really sorry,” Jason repeats and you laugh because only Jason Todd would apologize after you willingly sucked him off.

“Jason, I'm okay, really. I kind of liked it, I think.” His thumb that was stroking at your cheek stops and you flush at your own admittance. It was true. You had felt it low in your belly, cunt clenching at the intrusion to your throat.

“You're insane,” he mutters under his breath and you would've believed he felt that way if you didn't watch his dick twitch at your words.

“I'm being vulnerable with you and you call me insane. I can't believe you,” you playfully scoff.

He rolls his eyes, “still a brat.”

“I'm not a -” a startled noise leaves you as he suddenly picks you up off the ground and over his shoulder. You yelp when he smacks a firm hand against your ass.

“You are a brat,” he drops you on the bed with a bounce. He leans toward your face, noses nearly touching, “a cute one though.”

You lean the slightest bit forward waiting for a kiss but then he pulls away. You press forward more, trying to follow him and he pushes you back with a hand to your shoulder. He grins at you as he does so, a salacious thing that makes you squirm.

“Do me a favor, sweetheart, take your clothes off.” He tells you. He pauses for a moment and you nod. He moves to finally take off all of his gear. Instead of listening, you watch as piece by piece, the Red Hood disappears and you stare at Jason Todd.

It's as he pushes down his pants, now entirely naked for your viewing pleasure that he turns to you, still fully clothed.

“I know you're a bad listener sometimes but this is starting to get excessive.” He chides.

“You didn't kiss me and I just wanted to watch. You're so hot, Jason.” It's Jason's turn to blush. The sensual red on his cheeks turns to an embarrassed flush creeping up his ears and down his chest.

Instead of saying anything, he steps forward to kiss you where you sit on the bed. A pleased hum leaves you as you kiss him back in spite of the odd arch of your neck.

His hands land on your shoulders and slide down your arms. He pauses the kiss to tug you to stand. You let one hand press against his scarred chest and the other slips up and into his hair, pulling him back in for a kiss.

The kiss warms you as does his wandering hands, down you body, squeezing at your waist and you ass again. Then they move down to the hem of your dress. He smooths up, hands pressing intentional at the skin underneath. He breaks the kiss to pull the slip like fabric off of you and then he takes a step back.

“Lace?” he asks as he eyes you. You shift on your feet suddenly understanding the way his skin flushed when you stared.

“It was a nightclub dress, so I wore nightclub underwear.” You mumble.

“Nightclub underwear? What does that mean?” He laughs under his breath and makes you reach to smack at his arm.

He grabs your hand before it makes an impact and uses it to spin you around and press you against him. You can feel his cock pressing against the lace on your bum.

“Is it because you wore a slutty dress so you have to wear slutty underwear too?” He breaths into your ear as he presses a firm hand to your belly to make it easier for him to grind against you. His other hand presses against your ribs just under your bra.

“It's not slutty underwear, Jay.” You try to complain but the mass of his arms and hands around you make it hard for the words to be stable.

“Not slutty,” he scoffs. His hand from your rib moves up and pinches at the lace and the skin underneath, “I can see right through it.”

Your breath hitches at the pinch, chest arching just slightly. Your head tips back to lay against his shoulder. He takes the opportunity to mouth at the skin of your neck. His fingers halt their pinching and his entire hand squeezes at your boob.

“It's okay, sweetheart. Makes it easy to sneak a peek.” He breathes against your skin. His hand on your low belly slips down under the waistband Of you underwear.

You wrap your hand around his wrist, not pushing or pulling, just holding onto something. His hand slips lower, skimming over your clit to press his finger into your folds.

“Baby, I haven't even touched you and you’re already wet. Choking on dick really got you going, huh?” he chuckles against your ear.

“Shut up,” you whine out as his finger gather slick and presses it against your clit. He moves in slow circles. His hand that was groping at your tit slips under the lace to pinch at your nipple and you twitch in his hold.

“Oh, that was threatening,” he condescendingly coos at you. His foot slips between your legs and kicks them wider.

“What're you-” you cut your self off as he slips his finger down and up into your cunt, you clench around it.

“Gotta get you ready, sweetheart,” he kisses at your cheek and you jaw a gently thing that doesn't match the way his finger fucks up into you, “don't want to hurt you when I finally sink into you.”

Your hand tightens around his wrist as he presses a second thick finger in with his other and the rest of you sags against his chest at the stretch.

“You'd probably be into that, though,” his hand moves to your other boob, pinching hard at the nipple hidden under the lace and you wished he would just take your bra off.

“Why do- do you think that?” You manage out, breath panting.

“Wouldn't you like to know.” The teasing tone makes you giggle in spite of the way he has you and you can feel him smile against your neck. His hands slow, no longer pinching at your nipple, hand gently pressing against your chest instead.

“I like the way you laugh,” he murmurs and presses a gentle kiss to your neck and you think he's not so angry anymore.

“You literally have your fingers stuffed inside of me.” You say lightly and you grind down slightly against his hand and inadvertently against his cock pressed against you. He whimpers and presses his nose to your neck where he had previously kissed.

“Can't I just compliment you?” He mumbles as his fingers slip from your cunt. You clench at the emptiness.

“Thought you were fucking me like a stranger cause a pretty little thing like me would be a slut,” you repeat his earlier words using quotation marks with one hand.

“Jesus, what did I get into with you?” He mutters and you go to laugh again. It dies in your throat when he pushes your top half forward. you catch yourself with your hands before you face plant into the bed.

He tugs down your underwear and you press your thighs together at the sudden exposure of your sex. Jason clicks his tongue. His hands press into the skin of your ass and he uses his thumbs to spread your lower lips.

“Don't get shy now, sweetheart.” he tells you darkly.

You wish you could see him but the low lighting in the room makes it hard no matter how you crane your neck. A gasp leaves you suddenly at drip of warm wetness slipping down your cunt.

One of his hand leaves your ass and you feel his head of his cock press into you. He swipes across your cunt and to your clit, spreading your slick around. Your fingers tightening into the comforter and you attempt to wiggle your hips back against him. His other hand finally leaves your ass to hold at your hip, stalling your shifting.

“Easy, babe. I'm getting there.” You open your mouth to tell him off because now he's just teasing you.

A choked gasp leaves your parted lips instead as he presses just the head of him into your cunt. A groan leaves him as he pushes in more only to pull all the way back out again. the thumb of the hand holding your hip presses soothing circles into your skin.

He presses his chest against your back when he leans into your ear, “gotta relax, sweetheart. Let me in.” He kisses at your shoulder as he stands back up again.

He notches his cock at your entrance and pushes the slightest bit in again. His free hand slips under your hip and presses light circles into your clit. You sigh at the touch and the stretch as he pushes more and more into you.

“That's it. Your doing good,” he mumbles, “my sweet girl doing such a good job.” His praises have you squeezing your eyes shut .

It’s when he gives your clit a particularly harsh swipe and he slides in completely, his hips pressed to your ass, that your arms give and you face plant entirely. A hiss escapes you and your body tenses at the sudden pain from your injured cheek hitting fabric. Jason stops all of his movement.

“What's wrong?” He asks as he pulls back and you gather in your mind that he thinks he’s hurt you, pressed into you too quickly. You manage to turn your head to your uninjured cheek and bring a hand up to his at your hip.

“I'm fine!” your words come out in a mewling sound due to the feeling of him sliding out of you. You puff out a breath of air, “please don't pull out, Jason. It was just my cheek. I laid on the wrong one.” You manage to explain and he stills his moving, nearly completely out of you.

“Shit, I thought I hurt you sweetheart.” He breathes out and you can hear the worry in his tone.

“No, it's just- well your so fucking thick. arms gave out.” You admit. His hands tighten again and he pushes all the back into you, splitting you open. You claw at the blanket and whimper at the fullness of him.

He leans back over you again and you swear you can feel him even deeper. Your body can't decide if it wants to press back against him more or crawl away, hips twitching at the pressure.

“Sorry, baby,” he kisses your neck and shoulder, “I should've accommodated for you.”

You only have the wits to mumble out, “huh?” before he’s pulling back up and taking you with him. His hand presses at your chest below your throat like he had before, back arching from how he holds you. His other hand stays at your clit, rubbing at it lightly. The new arch of your back, the stretch of him and the press of his fingers has you moaning quietly.

He pulls out of you barely and uses the leverage he has on you to fuck back into you. You cry out and, with nothing to hold on to, your hands latch on to his forearms. He repeats it over and over, strokes pressed into you harder and harder.

The air smells of sex, your bodies sweaty and you feel slick making a mess of your thighs. You can hear Jason, quiet against the back of your shoulder, moaning and mumbling things you can’t make out.

A broiling heat grows low in your belly. You press your hand down Jason's forearm to meet his fingers pressing against your clit. You feel him hum against your skin as you move his fingers the way you want them.

“Stuffed full of cock and still a brat about getting what you want,” he says weakly pressing his forehead against the back of your neck. You can tell he's trying to keep up his facade of anger and possessiveness but falls flat.

His hand slides, intentional or not, you're unsure, up from your chest to your throat holding you there. Your cunt clenches around him and you feel his thrusts stutter.

“Fuck,” he drags his nose up the back of your neck, “need you to touch yourself, please. Touch those pretty tit's for me.” You can’t tell if it's a request or a demand but how were you supposed to argue with that, especially when his hand tightens lightly around your throat in a way that makes you keen.

You keep your hand pressed to his at you clit but drop the other to your breast, dragging the lace cup down and squeezing at it. As you move to pinch at your nipple, Jason sinks his teeth into the meat of your shoulder, harder enough to bruise your skin. It stings but it tips you over the edge you hadn’t realized you were teetering on.

A gasped moan escapes you at the suddenness of it. Your entire body tightens, your cunt, your hands, and your knees give out . You're sure if Jason hadn’t already had his hands on you, you would have collapsed. Jason doesn’t stop thrusting into you, doesn't stop stroking your clit despite the way you claw at his hand. It’s only when you start twitching, body jerk against his touch that he lets up.

He stills to a stop inside you, still thick and pulsing. His hands ease from sensitive areas to gently lower you down on the bed. It’s only once he's pulled out and is gently manhandling onto your back that you hear him speaking to you.

“You're okay, sweetheart. Did so good. Came so pretty. Could listen to your sounds all the time…” and he keeps going, sweet nothings whispered against your skin as you settle onto the bed, bra quickly discarded.

His hands massage your body, mostly at your hips where you can still the imprint of his hand gripping you. It's when he sits back on his knees, to apparently inspect you based on how he’s looking, that you notice that he’s still hard.

“Jason?” You say, reaching a hand for him, even though you feel like a wet noodle. He takes your hand and playfully swings your hand back and forth. You barely have the energy to laugh at childish motion.

“You’re still- you can keep going,” you breathe out because while you can barely feel your legs you'd happily let him sink back into you just to feel the stretch, “if you want to, of course.” You add quietly, splaying your legs slightly. His eyes dropped to your heated center between your legs and you think he gets distracted though you don't have to be a mind reader when his cock does the talking for him.

He shifts, hands gently pushing your legs wider before meeting your eye, “You're sure?”

You nod at his concern, pressing yourself more into the bed and closing your eyes. You feel him move again to hover over you, the heat of his skin radiating into yours. You feel him guide himself back in and push in slowly. A weak sound leaves you and your hips twitch but your body eases into the stretch much easier the second time around.

Hips pressed together, you wait for him to move, to get himself off so you two can go to sleep. He surprises you instead, pressing tender kisses to your cheek. He stays there, soft and slow, pulling away just a breath to move lower to the edge of your lips. One of his hands gently drags your knee to sit on his hip and he caresses your thigh from there.

His hips finally move and instead of a dragging thrust like you expected he just grinds against you, his pelvic bone pressing against your clit. Your back arches at the sensation, hands grappling for his shoulders. His kisses move to the junction of your jaw and your neck, still soft.

“Thank you, sweetheart,” he murmurs against your ear before he continues kissing your skin like you're something precious. You twitch with each grind his hips, cunt fluttering at sensation as he presses his weight atop, burying his face into your neck.

“So close, baby, so good .” You barely hear as his grinds turn into short thrusts. Your nails digging into his shoulders while his kisses against your skin turn wet and sloppy.

He gives one finally thrust back into you and moans, his hands dimpling into your skin. You feel the warmth of him seeping into you as he settles atop you, a steady weight.

You slump as he stops moving the stimulation ceasing. You feel hazy but not lost. You can feel Jason, warm and heavy on top of you. It grounds you in a way you hadn't anticipated.

The hands that you had scratched at his back and shoulders with slides into his hair, twirling the sweaty locks between your fingers while you listen to his breath, slow and steady.

Your mind drops at the warm soft atmosphere, a sleepiness creeping into your mind. You would probably fall asleep if Jason wasn't starting to become uncomfortably heavy in his position atop you and still inside of you.

“Jason?” You voice weakly as you card your hands through his hair. You feel more than hear his hum against the skin of your collar.

“Too much?” You say it like a statement and a question rolled into one, unsure if that's the phrase you're looking for. Your hips ached from where they were pinned open by him and you feel a seated stickiness where you two meet.

He shifts up in his forearms to look down at you. You wish this was yours all the time. That Jason wouldn't get so lost in his own turmoil and just say what he wanted to say to you.

“Did I go too far?” He asks, “I didn't hurt you, did i?”

You lazily smile at his worried tone, “I feel great. Just couldn't breath and sticky.”

He blinks down at you and you wait for the salacious comment you're sure he's going to make. You wait for his crooked smirk and ego that you hate to admit your into sometimes.

He surprises you, leaning down and pressing the softest, sweetest kiss you think you've ever received to your lips. Once, twice, three times before he's moving backwards, cock sliding out of you.

You whine, thighs twitching at the emptiness that follows. You can feel yourself clenching at the feeling, can feel the ooze of his cum leaving you. It makes you fluster despite the way he had you a few minutes prior.

Jason kisses at the skin of your rib, lower than you thought he'd be with your eyes closed and then kisses at your hip. Your thighs twitching closed at his southward movement.

“Easy, babe,” he says, keeping your knees apart. You feel his fingers slip through your folds collecting the leaking fluid only to bring them up to your clit. Your whole body jerks at the sensation, too much and not enough all at once.

“Jason,” you whimper in complaint and he just coos at you, rubbing circles into your clit til your panting again. An edge of warmth works its way up your spin and you dig your hands into the sheets.

You make the mistake of opening your eyes to look at him again expecting a cocky grin at how easily he's working you back up.

It's not there. No, instead you find something near reverent as he stares at you and it makes you squirm more than his hands on you. You close your eyes again and throw your arm over them for good measure to hide from his affectionate gaze.

He takes it as a challenge, wiping up more cum to press against your clit. It has you keening, hips pressing up against his hand. His lips return to your skin moving back up to your breasts. He breathes across your nipple and your back arches, chasing him.

“Jay, please,” you beg as you feel your orgasm creep closer and closer. You feel it then, the barest hint of that stupid smirk against your skin. He envelops your nipple with his mouth, free hand coming to grasp at your other breast.

He sucks lightly and you feel your legs begin to shake. He presses harder against your clit and his teeth make an appearance, skimming your nipple. You gasp a choked cry from your throat as your body curls in on itself and away from the stimulation as you cum, stars shining in your eyes.

Jason eases his touching, pressing kisses to your skin wherever he could reach, “sorry, just need another from you. Did so good, you sound so pretty.”

You shiver at his affection, a harsh change from the way the evening had started but you don't hate it. The warmth of him leaves and you don't have it in you to open your eyes or move your arm.

It's after a minute of silence and finally coming back down from your high that you gather yourself. Your body aches as you sit up to look around the dark room.

“Jason?” Your voice sounds a little hoarse and entirely too weak for your liking.

“Jason?” You try again, stronger, as you pull your sheets to cover your rapidly cooling body.

A heaviness settles over your body. Maybe Jason hadn't meant what he said. Maybe he just wanted sex to cool his anger and be done. Maybe he didn't keep his promises.

Your thoughts pause when you hear movement through the open doorway. Your eyes make out the shape of Jason In the dim, a hunched over look that you knew he got when he felt out of place. Something you were used to seeing when the bats gather as civilians.

He pauses at the edge of your bed once he sees you. His flickered down to your now covered body.

“I, uh, i got a bath running for you, unless you want to just sleep or you know it's whatever.” He stumbles over his words and the sudden nervousness of Jason Todd makes you laugh. Like he hadn't just dicked you down ten minutes ago.

“A bath would be nice,” you say after you watch his features droop a little from your laughing, “I don't think I can walk though. Need a big strong man to carry me.” You flop back on the bed, wincing at the pressure of your thighs.

“That's pretty anti feminist of you,” he playfully chides as he pulls the sheet from your body and tucks his arms under you.

You gawk at him as he lifts you up. A startled laugh leaves you, “what?”

He laughs at your reaction, fingers digging playfully at your ribs where he holds you.

“I'm kidding, sweetheart,” he noses at your hair and presses a kiss there. You're starting to like this quiet affection from Jason. Not a show for anyone else but the both of you.

It's only once he's eased you into the still filling tub and stepped back that you realize he's found his boxers.

“You're not going to join me?” you ask timidly, eyeing him. He smiles at you and squats down, pushing your sweaty hair from your face and tucking it behind your ear.

“Bathtubs a little small, don't you think?” Your eyes close at the touch of his hand but you pout at his words.

“You really gonna let that stop you?” You goad and slide an eye open to see if you've tempted him enough. He catches you and grins, cheeks dimpling.

“Well when you put it like that.” He rolls his eyes but complies with your request.

You slide forward in the tub as he steps out of his boxers and sits in the water behind you. You promptly turn off the water spout, not needing more with Jason's added body mass.

Jason's wet hand creeps up your spin and you take it as a sign to settle back against his chest between his thighs. His knees sit above the water on either side of you and you use them as an armrest as you settle your head against his clavicle.

One of his hands settles on the edge of the tub and the other, against your belly, massaging the skin lightly. You close your eyes enjoying the warmth, the steam and Jason.

“Are you still angry?” You ask, remembering the drastic change from the beginning of the evening versus now. His hand pauses on your skin but his fingers tap like he's thinking.

“I wasn't angry,” he admits quietly, “I was scared.” He stops there and you don't push. You'd have to talk about it either now or in the morning.

After a moment of silence, he continues, “I was scared you'd get hurt or worse and you'd never know…” he trails off and you take his hand at your stomach squeezing at his fingers.

“It's okay, I know. You don't fake the way you look at me, Jason.” You tell him, you tip your head to the side trying to meet his eye. He squeezes your fingers back and brings his other hand up to cradle your jaw.

“That's a cheap shot.”

You snort at the comment, “I don't fake the way I look at you either.” You press up to kiss where you can at his jaw.

“Oh really? You like me or something?” He teases hands shifting to hug you. He tips his head to kiss your forehead.

“Don't be mean to me,” you breathe and it makes his arms tighten.

“I thought you liked that.” He coos against your skin.

“Not right now, handsome. Be sweet to me” you murmur, eyes sliding shut.

His thumb presses into your shoulder, rubbing soothingly, “okay, sweetheart, I can do that too.”

****

Masterlist

Make a request!

#jason todd x reader #red hood x reader #jason todd smut #Jason Todd x reader smut #red hood smut #red hood x reader smut #minors dni #kandyscorner #kandywrites

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balkanradfem · 26 days ago

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So I wanted to play Infinity Nikki because it's beautiful, and aimed specifically at women, but it's an online game. So that was a no go.

Next best thing I could think of was to find a streamer who had uploaded the entire gameplay and to live vicariously trough them, so that's what I did. I downloaded 30hrs worth of gameplay and watched it offline at home, having a soothing time for my anxiety watching this adorable world where your only concern is finding resources for making clothing, and petting different animals. The woman streaming it was incredibly smart and insightful and I loved her, I got used to hearing her voice in my home. We also had exact same reactions to things! We both laughed at the same time and got to same conclusions.

Some evets in this game impressed me, for instance, the main character, who seems to be an 18yo girl, runs into a suspicions male who asks her to 'come with him so he could show her something', so both me and the streamer are yelling NO Nikki do not go with this m*n. I was afraid since it was a video game, that Nikki would actually follow him, as it happened before in video games, and any anxiety she has about him would be dismissed as her being 'silly' and 'generalizing'. However our Nikki says 'No I have other stuff to do, I'm not following you' and I was Very Pleased. Thank you video game for saying 'that m*n has bad intentions and we don't have to pretend he doesn't.' He tries to kidnap her pet afterwards but she is saved by a cool woman who loves violence against males. I was very enchanted by the cool woman.

Another fun thing, the main character gets confronted with the idea of an object that can grant any wish you have, instantly. A villain proposes this to her, and sees a change in her face expression, so he goes 'You have one! What wish did you think of!' and she goes.. Nikki goes: 'I wish for all girls to never gets cramps again!' And I paused and gasped. The streamer and me were both stunned because never has a video game even brought this up! They were really catering to us! They knew what we wanted and they said our hero wants this for you! This won me over, even though the game has lots of drama and gambling elements, being catered to feels so good. If only the medical field would cater to us.

Later on, the streamer starts talking about her online experience, how much joy she had for streaming at first, and how later on it became a source of anxiety, due to the amount of harassment and criticism she would receive based on her looks and behaviour. She very insightfully concluded that it was the people talking the loudest who were there specifically to harass, and she probably had many lurkers who watched her content and liked it and just never said anything. I felt called out! That was me, just watching. I typed up a comment for her, thinking, hey, if all these males can harass her, then I can send an honest and appreciative comment to this woman.

So I told her how much she brightened my days with her commentary and streams, how long I've been watching and how much of a delight she was to listen to, and how we had the same reactions for most of events. I thanked her for going trough the trouble of making all these videos, despite the anxiety, because I enjoyed them so much, and appreciated her opening up about her experience. I sent this comment to an older video, which already had 430 comments, so I figured, okay, she's not gonna see this, it's a crowd in there, but I did my thing, I let her know.

2 days later I got a reply! She told me that my comment had made her cry, and thanked me so much and hoped we would have more common interests in the future. I'm beside myself, not only she saw it, she replied back. My comment made her cry? Lovely woman I've been listening for days interacted with me! I know I'm exposing myself for how lonely and parasocial I am, but today I'm really living my best life online. Women interacting positively with other women online wields positive results. Maybe I should comment more in general.

Also about Infinity Nikki, I had a funny idea. In this game you can get thousands of different clothing and accessories for Nikki, you can change her hair and eye color to anything, you can change her skin color, you can get butterflies flying around her ankles. But, she never has any body hair. What if we all joined up and started requesting that we get to choose for her body to be unshaved. As is normal and natural. If we harassed them into it. If we threw a tantrum about it. Do you think they'd do it. Do you think they'd cater to us to that amount. Or are there dreams that cannot be. I think it would be so funny if we did that. Can you imagine having a female video game protagonist with body hair. I want that.

#infinity nikki #living vicariously trough a streamer #i later checked the video again and it said my comment was hightlighted #what the hell #some real sempai noticed me time #i love women i wish the entire internet was only women #it would be heaven for me

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n1k0laa5 · 7 days ago

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✧ ･ﾟINTRODUCTION ･ﾟ✧

☽𓂃⋆⁺₊ hello helloooo my little pixel-dusted darlings, reality-skippers, god-babies and deities in training!!!

you’ve just stumbled… or maybe manifested? channeled? saw it in a dream? felt the pull in your solar plexus—into a corner of the internet where your human suit will probably glitch, your sense of self will start peeling like glitter stickers off a foggy mirror, and your concept of “reality” might just cry a little in the backroom,, teehee.

anywayzzz hi. I’m Nikolas. it means Victory of the People and i always gloat abt it. You can call me any version of my name, srsly, Nikk, Niko, Nikki, idrc ;3

You may have seen my posts recently as I’ve been a lurker on tumblr for a while and decided to just post a bit, then realized “woah, people like this” so here’s my introduction! yes, i may sound slightly different compared to my post cuz i’ve dialed down the seriousness lolll

🪞— i’m part hyper-child that’ll bite your ankles, part god, part tired teenager scribbling affirmations in the margins of existence and screaming motivation at you.

14 years on this planet—15 soon, so clap for me on july okay?? i want confetti and cupcakes with existential sprinkles.

i was already an open minded child and lived in my imagination most my life—so finding manifesting and shifting felt like it was FOR me. i’ve been shifting since 2022, have shifted before and i think i started manifesting since i was like, nine, before i even knew what that meant. i was just like “if i imagine i give off queen bee vibes.. it works?!” It was mostly appearance and family related things I manifested, I created from nothing like it was breathing.

and now? now i do it on purpose.

🎠 — this blog is a playground for the formless. a candyland of divine chaos. a metaphysical scrapbook for weird little gods with glittery fingers and notebooks full of spells that rhyme with their heartbreaks.

i talk about manifestation, law of assumption, reality shifting, the void, dreams, non-physical planes, quantum stuff but like… cute. i probably cried on the floor last week but still channeled something celestial the same night. duality is real. i am the contradiction.

🧸 — i’m everything and nothing all at once.

you’ll either feel me like static electricity in your chest

or not at all.

and that’s okay too.

🪐 — i don’t care what gods you believe in, if you kneel when you pray, or if you think tarot is a scam and the universe is just a rock. i will however keep spreading my belief that you are god so if u don’t like that then.. sorry:(

i’ve been through stuff. i’m an ex-muslim, Iraqi, bisexual child with more trauma than folders in my google drive. i’m soft and electric. i’m a little delusional. i’m learning how to laugh at the dream while still dreaming it.

and you?

you’re here.

that means you’re ready. or maybe just curious.

either way, stay. plz.

𖤐 okok wait—wait. don’t scroll yet. i’m not done being mysterious in an attention seeking way

𓆩𖤐𓆪 FUN (???) FACTS ABOUT ME

☞ i have a tiktok account 4 shifting! (shiftingwithniko,, yes, shameless promo.) but i’m not rlly active there anymore bc we all know how shiftok is..

☞ i am SO shit at keeping friends so if we’re moots, expect very awkward talks.

☞ i’m too emotionally cooked to stay in this dimension but I’ll try my best to get out constant posts for y’all..

☞ too many drs, too many ideas, too many hopes and dreams, but aren’t we all like this

✧:˚🫀 MY GENERAL VIBES:

— i’m the kind of person who will walk into a room like i invented existence and then immediately spiral about if i said “hi” weird

— i have main character syndrome and background character syndrome at the exact same time. how? don’t ask. i just do.

— sometimes i say stuff like “i’m literally god” and then trip over air and cry about my tone sounding weird when i ordered food.

— i’m a walking contradiction and that’s the POINT. like. i will scream at the sky to bend for me, and then cry because my hair isn’t doing the thing i wanted.

— i wanna sit on a cloud and giggle but also punch god in the throat and become him.

☾⋆｡𖦹°‧ my personality.. yay..

a child god who’s a little too aware.

like, i KNOW too much for someone who still gets sparkly-eyed over stickers and wears fuzzy socks while rewriting timelines.

i call it Divine Hyper Teen Boy Delusion (™ pending.)

pretty sure i change personalities every week and have an identity crisis like thrice a month

⚠️ — i’m not here to convince you of anything.

i’m just here to remind you that you’re not crazy for feeling like you were meant for more.

you were. you are. and you already are it.

🍬 THINGS I BELIEVE IN:

— manifestation (all methods; LOASS, LOA, etc)

— shifting

— subliminals

— astral projection

— you are god

so yeah.

stay divine, pretty souls.

don’t forget to script. or not, ur choice!

drink water (or stardust).

and remember, if reality acts up?

Make a new one.

— with shaky hands & glittering neurons, Nikolas, your neighborhood hypermanifestor, glitter prophet, & certified timeline menace

pspsps you’re cute & you deserve a dream that kisses you back.

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carpedzem · 3 days ago

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also also the last thing can we noT with this weird crazy ass narrative that 'oh well just move to the platform that has no ccs on and btw tumblr doesnt count anymore bc they are probably lurking here (and its totally okay for them to do that) especially her bc she seems like she could'. fuck off. FUCK OFF. this is MY space, me coming here IS making the separation. why are we suddenly chill with ccs getting into our business here, from lurkers accs that we cannot block NO LESS! literally crazy town what is going on right now

#flabbergasted

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sinsxo · 22 days ago

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01. match found!

synopsis. it started with hacking accusations, and ended with you completely oblivious to who was watching your stream.

notes. thank you guys for waiting! in case you're unfamiliar with valorant, the reader is playing a character named reyna while nagi is playing a character named jett. valorant players usually refer to each other by the names of their characters and it applies to any streamer's chat as well. lmk if anything else is confusing!

cw. cussing, internet slang, chat has parasocial tendencies, valorant.

navigation. masterlist.

[🔴 LIVE] nagi seishiro @/nagi_channel

nagi seishiro oh… i died again to the reyna.

nagilvr ntnt!! revenge arc starts now user222 that reyna is lowkey cracked tf user4 DARE I SAY the reyna is hacking user90 bruh shes farming you lowkey user18 it’s ALWAYS reyna user5 reynas cooking 🔥🔥🔥 user20 is she cheating or just better 🧍 user777 nah id report just in case

nagi seishiro what the… how did that shot even hit me? kinda weird that she knew i was there.

user9 nah you didn’t even peek 💀 user111 clairvoyant reyna in your lobby user33 wallhacks??? user777 user33 i think so too nagifan user33 reyna is def hacking user88 yo that spiderman?? the spidey senses tingling

nagi seishiro you guys think reyna’s hacking? we’re still winning though.

user4 W for humble king nagilvr plot twist: stream sniping?? user00 i tihkn reyna js built diff user13 either a cheater or psychic user8 i dont think its hacking js skill diff user66 user8 take it back rey just aced 💀 user8 NVM that shot was kinda crazy icl

nagi seishiro is this person hacking?

user10 welp this again nagifan confirmed at this point tbh user32 we said this last time and it was just a 14 y/o prodigy 🙏🏻 stanname guys shes literally a streamer chill 😭 user3 i already reported oop user55 REPORT + BLOCK + UNINSTALL user8 stanname fr? whats her handle user777 stanname drop the name rn we’re waiting stanname @/yourusername shes legit good yall stop the false reports lol nagifan NAGI SHE’S A STREAMER GO SAY HI user222 ohhh wait ive seen her clips she’s hella good

nagi seishiro they’re a streamer? i’m checking them out if i die again.

user0 LOLLLL bros throwing now user44 lmao rip nagilvr uhh user7 AINT NO WAY 💀 user949 bro is crashing out 😭🙏🏻 user11 nagi crash out real nagishairstrand reyna needs to get a life

nagi seishiro gg’s. hold on, chat. i’m going to check the reyna out, what’s their channel?

user9 omg pls say the reyna is live rn user4 watch him queue snipe her nagifan HE’S LOOKING GUYS HES LOOKING user55 bros already on the hunt user22 lurking activated user101 parasocial speedrun

nagi seishiro is she away right now? oh, she’s back. let’s watch her play for a bit.

user99 she said she needed to pee nagilvr she went to pee user44 watching her like its a VOD review user22 nagi turning into a lurker 💀 user8 SHES BACK user33 “let’s watch” 👀 ok nagi

nagi seishiro not bad. her aim’s insane, game-sense is on another level too. and she’s pretty... good.

user99 AND SHE’S PRETTY???? user0 chat we lost nagilvr nagi what was that last part 😭 user4 bro you down bad already user111 he said “she’s pretty” and hes tryna brush it off im crying user8 new ship just dropped 🚢 user77 chat clip that NOW user1 nagi ur not slick bruh user09 next stream titled “i fell for my ranked enemy 😳” user0 do you want us to leave the stream so you two can be alone??

nagi seishiro should we queue into another match, chat?

user22 nah you tryna queue with HER be honest nagifan blink twice if ur trying to match again user77 queue solo but think duo user44 you mean queue into HER lobby user8 he’s in too deep 💔 user11 y'all acting like she's not already in another match 😭

exit stream.

[🔴 LIVE] you @/yourusername

you it’s fine guys, everyone’s probably burnt out from playing so much.

namelover okay but ur team is lowkey braindead 😭 userv suuuure they just suck userone Y’ALL enemy jett is nagi namelover userone WHAT EXCUSE ME userfive NO WAIT ITS ACTUALLY HIM user45 lmaoooo and hes getting fried by you user88 PMFG NAGI NAGI NAGI user6 he aint all that tbh

you i’m playing with nagi? nagi seishiro? that’s cool.

user44 yoo whats up gng nagis stream is GAGGED user4 not us thinking you were hacking lol user10 wait you is so pretty what user8 nagi chat was MAD no lie user7 vro was crashing out

you he’s actually too good. i don’t think our team can comeback, chat.

userfive they call him a genius for a reason user22 the way ur talking about him rn 🧍‍♂️ user20 idk its giving enemies to lovers userone no bc you guys lowkey have chemistry userv i smell an arc coming user09 me watching enemies to lovers unfold in real time 🍿 user77 if u duo w him i will cry actual tears

you tough luck, gg’s team. that was a really long round. gotta pee, be right back.

userone your team was running on hopes and prayers ngl userv idk how she doesnt crash out w these teammates namelover tbh she was against the nagi seishiro userone namelover yeah but she couldve won if her teammates were better nagi_channel has entered chat. userv WTF namelover 💀💀💀 userfive you COME BACK NOW stanname hoyl shit user7 she peeing while he JOINED user89 valorant timing HELPPP user90 THE LORE IS WRITING ITSELF

you i’m back, let’s queue again. i think i’ll swap my vandal skin real quick.

userv SHES NOT READING CHATT userfive OMG SOMEONE TELL HER namelover WHY IS THIS SO STRESSFUL userone this is actual tragedy user65 this cant b real 💔 userthree you look up PLS

you wait, i forgot to get water. i’ll lock yoru and come back.

usertwo no way this is happening user012 PLEASE SOMEONE SCREAM user6 THE WAY SHE DOESNT KNOW user7 the desperation in this chat rn 💀 user44 bro pulled up just to watch an empty gaming chair

you the round already started? why is everyone freaking out in chat?

userv NAGI JOINED STREAM user7 she is NOT meant to meet this man HELP user88 someone teach her how to read chat user9 i cant w the timing she came back when the match started 💔 stanname HE JOINED HES WATCHING U

you nice one. my teammates are really good this time, compared to the previous game.

user4 ong this cant be real user6 niceeeeeee user88 she joined late and still got a 3k userfive you GIRL PLEASE READ CHAT userthree humble queen fr

you huh? i’m reading chat now. nagi is in my stream?

userfive he WAS userv i think hes gone girl YOU MISSED HIM user11 and you were peeing and rehydrating stanname past tense. heartbreak user6 HE WATCHED. HE LURKED. HE LEFT. userfive im fonna crash ougt weewoo i think he searched your stream out of curiosity userlol you missed him by SECONDS useryay this is the most tragic gamer romance setup i’ve ever seen

you what do you mean the nagi seishiro was in my stream? chat. what do you mean.

userthree GIRL TOO LATE YOU WERENT READING CHAT stanname GUYS SHE WAS PISSING OK userone stanname BYEE user65 WE TRIED TO WARN YOU nagilvr GIRL HE SAID YOU WERE PRETTY IN HIS STREAM userv nagilvr he whATTTT user4 userv were deadass user111 nobody snitch that we snitched on nagi user09 tbf he said she was pretty good but everyone collectively ignored the last part user8 the last part was unnecessary we all know hes a fake nonchalant emo 🥀

exit stream.

yourusername

yourusername thanks for joining stream you guys are the best frfr

view comments.

stanname next stream when 💔 it ended too fast userone that was an eventful stream view replies.

namelover had us stressing and shi userthree fr userfive had all of chat yelling at the screen yourusername userfive mb gng 💔 userfive yourusername OMG yell at me please userone userfive HELP??

userv update us if he dms you 😊😊 nagilvr collab with nagi when 😮‍💨 stanname your hand in marriage please 🙏🏻

exit instagram.

taglist. closed! @lovingmayday @blu3-l0v3r @fiestvr @bigclownshoes @mixolya @nevvynev @p1z-d0njud6em3 @fischly @kuromixheartzzz @choco-cvt @ilovewonyo @summmerr0-0 @luvrofthemoon @kyeeeeeeeweeeeeeewi @silentheav @zephyyyrrra @emikikus18

back to. masterlist. proceed to. part 2.

all images, aside from the dividers, do not belong to me. credit belongs to their original creators on pinterest & xhs.

#nagi seishiro #nagi seishiro smau #seishiro nagi #nagi seishiro fluff #seishiro nagi smau #seishiro nagi fluff #blue lock #bluelock #bllk #bllk nagi #bllk imagines #nagi imagines #seishirou nagi #nagi seishirou #seishiro nagi x reader #🍒 ˎˊ —pixel perfect.

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rainnyyriyah · 2 days ago

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~ TAKE A RIDE ☙ S.L

a/n: saw something about biker sophia. so for my first post, headcanons. ALSO IF ITS REALLY ASS TELL ME AND LIKE TELL ME HOW TO IMPROVE IN MY ASKS. this is my first blog usually im a lurker. ill probably make a sophia or dani fic since like im in love with them idk.

cw: suggestive, a bit short

pairing: biker!sophia x f!reader

the day after you asked sophia to ride the back of her bike, she showed up with knee pads and an extra helmet. “Put these on and hold onto me tight, okay?”

Sophia usually drives fast—reckless and carefree. But when you’re on the back of her bike, she takes it slow, strategically moving through traffic, and she makes sure her baby, you, is especially safe.

Sophia LOVES quality time; especially with you. And late night rides are perfect for that. after a long drive, she’ll pull over at y’all’s favorite secluded gas station. she’ll turn around on her bike to face you, hands around your waist, pulling you in closer for a long and deep kiss.

On her bike, Sophia gives off major “bad-boy” energy. She loves to tease, she’s self-assured, owning the space that’s her bike. But she’s still the sweet, gentle, and loving girl who is playful and bubbly personality makes you fall deeply in love.

She likes everything done in a very specific way—so much so that she taught herself how to modify, repair, and maintain her own bike. She can spend days working on it until she’s satisfied with the result, and even then, she’s not always convinced it’s perfect. And yes, she looks amazingly sexy in grease-stained clothes.

not really a headcanon but THE HELMET STAYS ONNNN

#katseye #sophia #sophia laforteza #biker sophia #sophia laforteza headcanons #katseye imagines #katseye headcanons #sophia laforteza imagines #sophia laforteza x reader #katseye x reader #sophia x reader

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doveentrails · 2 months ago

Text

Heaven Can't Be Sweeter Than This (Chapter 1)

Art: You’re lonely?

Fuck. So lonely, you want to scream. You want to disappear, to drown yourself in your drink. You type back.

**Yeah, honestly, I hope it’s not too pathetic to admit that. I had a bad break up a while ago and I just haven’t gotten things back on track.

Art: It’s okay to admit that.

**Okay good, I don’t want to scare you off

Art: You won’t.

You're lonely. You're bored. You're unsatisfied with your job, still not over your last break up, and your closest friend is your cat. You want someone to hurt you. You want to feel something. So you venture into the depths of a kink forum and start chatting with a mysterious stranger...

This was a fun idea I had that I'm so excited to write! What if Art was a lurker on various weird, dubious online forums looking to lure victims, but then meets someone who's into it, like really into it. He's confused, annoyed, he's into it too?? What could go wrong! Will probably be a little slow keeping this one updated, but I love the idea so much and I promise I'm gonna see it thru!!

Yes, this fic will be very NSFW, but nothing here in chapter one...

Word Count: 3800

All chapters

A mug of tea sits steaming on your desk as you stare at the monitor in front of you. You just have a few more emails to reply to, but you feel your eyes growing heavy. You were swamped with extra work tonight, still on the clock hours after you’d normally be done. Lifting the mug to your lips, you feel the warmth of the apple blossom black tea seep into your fingertips. You take a sip, hoping the caffeine will tide you over. Grogginess pulled at the corners of your vision, but the frustrating part was that without fail, every night when you lay your head on your pillow, sleep was hopelessly out of reach. You’d toss and turn and stare at the ceiling for hours, imagining arguments that would never happen, horrible ways you could die, dredging up old embarrassing memories. It was torture.

The insomnia had been an issue for the better part of a year, and you weren’t sure what the reason for it was. You’d had a sleep study done to not much avail, and you hated relying on prescription sleep aids, though you often had to. The weeks you went without them were brutal, and you’d have to make up for it with an 18 hour crash brought to you by your friends seroquel and nyquil.

People told you it was because you spent so long staring at screens. The blue light messed with your circadian rhythm. That’s what it was. You just had to quit that damn job you always complained about and get outside more. The long hours of screen time, of course, were courtesy of your job as a cyber security operator for a large corporate health and beauty company. You got to work from home though, which you loved. Staying at home with your fluffy, grey ragamuffin cat, Mia, was a perk of the job. The work itself was something you could take or leave. You didn’t care much for being a cog in the corporate machine.

Ever the practical type, you went into the tech field for job security. That stuff has always come naturally to you anyway, and you didn’t mind it. Some of it was actually interesting. Being one of the few women in your field was a novelty that soon wore off though. That’s why you opted for the health and beauty route. It was a company with more women and general diversity than the average cyber security sector. You liked your coworkers enough, even though you saw them almost exclusively through screens. Not much of a people person, you tended to prefer things that way.

You had a comfortable routine, but you had to admit that you were bored. The days tended to blur together, and you’d sometimes go weeks without leaving the house until you’d realize you’re about to run out of something essential and have to go to the store. The cashier would be your only socialization for the month. Mostly, you liked to exist this way, but recently you were finding yourself feeling more and more unsatisfied. Maybe that’s what the insomnia was trying to tell you; something needed to change.

You finished your email replies and signed off for the day, taking another large gulp of your tea, now cooled to the perfect temperature. Getting up from your ergonomic, cushioned rolling chair, you switched your apartment from work to relax mode. It was a distinction you had to make. You hated the lines between work and leisure becoming blurred. The switch entailed turning off all the overhead lights in favor of string lights, kitchy neon signs and lava lamps that filled the apartment with a diffuse, multicolored glow. Next, you put on a record, taking the time to choose something that matched your mood. Tonight you were feeling melancholy and melodic, opting for some acoustic singer songwriter to waft through your gigantic sound system at the perfect decibel. You stripped off your jeans (you opted to wear them to put yourself in your work mindset, even though you didn’t have to), and changed into a pair of pajama pants and your Garfield slippers. Lastly, you took your tea to the kitchen and poured in a shot of brandy.

Officially off the clock, you sat back down at your desk with a sigh. You clicked around your usual sites for a bit, scrolling social media, reading forums and checking ebay auctions for vintage clothing. Your spiked tea warmed you from the inside out. It was your favorite pre dinner ritual. Mia came over and rubbed up against your legs, chirping softly at you. You scratched her behind the ears and cooed back at her. This was your typical Wednesday evening. That nagging urge to search for something more surfaced, and you took another sip of tea.

The dull ache of boredom in your chest propelled you to open the web browser and begin typing. The brandy supplied you some boldness as you navigated to a page you rarely visited: a fetish forum, specifically a heavy BDSM forum. Even though you were alone, you felt yourself blush as the page loaded, and you glanced over your shoulder. Mia blinked at you judgmentally.

Admittedly you had some kinks, quite a few, and you’d never really found a partner who matched what you were into. Once you got into the details of your fantasies, you scared any potential mates away. Some would go along with it, but you could tell they were performing, not being genuine, and that just put you off. It became frustrating, and you dreaded opening up about your unconventional tastes. You had one partner (your now most recent ex girlfriend) who you felt was on your level, and it had been great while it lasted. She let you try things you’d never done with anyone else. She had indulged your fantasies, even yes and-ing you and giving you more than you’d asked. You had thought she was your perfect match, Liz.

But around this time last year, the relationship went up in flames. You hadn’t been seeing each other particularly long, just 9 months, but it was a passionate whirlwind 9 months. Real stereotypical lesbian stuff. She was actually the first woman you’d ever been with. You had gotten tired of men trying to play the tough dom role, laying it on too thick and making you cringe. Liz made it look easy. She was a breath of fresh air. She gave you something you never knew you wanted, and then she was gone. The insomnia started after your break up, your longest relationship since.

Post-Liz, you took a big step back. You were depressed and bitter and entirely uninterested in dating. The handful of times you tried, you got cold feet and backed out, calling off dates or just ghosting them entirely. Liz had really done a number on you. All your friends knew it too. You weren’t very social to begin with, but once you started seeing Liz, your social life went out the window. You were entirely consumed in her orbit. You still haven’t made a full recovery socially, letting the bridges of your friendships atrophy due to apathy and embarrassment. (Surely, it’s been too long to reach out now.)

So here you sat behind a screen, a voyeur into the lives of other kinksters. People who were actually getting some, you thought with no shortage of self pity. You read several discussion posts, questions about bondage, cnc fantasies, people bragging about glorious encounters that made your mouth water. You thought about pulling up some porno, jerking off and going to bed, but something stopped you. Instead, you decided to type a post.

ISO someone with dark tastes. I’m looking for a sadist who will hold nothing back. Someone who will push my limits (Trust me, I’ve yet to discover them - Maybe you can help me?). Aiming for bruises I can’t leave the house with, and stories I can’t tell at parties. The more blood the better. An offer not for the faint of heart, or weak of stomach. (Medical knowledge is a plus!) Reach me here, and we can discuss further, xoxo.

You let the text sit in the type box, looking back at you. Rereading it several times, you still debate whether or not to post it. You get up and change the record, putting on some 80’s new wave to boost your confidence. You deserve this. You can find someone twice as kinky as Liz. Someone who will actually get you to safeword for once. That’s what you're really looking for. Honestly, you’re so bored of everything, so numb and detached most of the time, you just want someone to scare the shit out of you.

You walk back to the computer, holding your breath and hitting post before you can think better of it. Then you slink over to the full length mirror in your bedroom and sexy dance in front of it, hyping yourself up. Internally you repeat the mantra, ‘you deserve hot, depraved sex’. Feeling a little better about yourself, you finish your tea and then make yourself some dinner. You get comfy on the couch with more brandy and some shrimp pasta to watch your usual bad reality TV.

Picking up your phone, you decide to text your long distance friend, Nic. He works for the same beauty company as you, but in regional sales. You met years ago at a large holiday event, and have been friends ever since. Even though you're seven hours away from each other, you talk nearly every day.

Ur not gonna believe what I just did…

Nic: What? Took a shit thru someones sunroof

Lmaoooo nooo wtf

No I posted on KinkBound

Nic: Shut up! Finally! Get some, girl

Nic: Show me what u posted!

Nooo wayy, too personal

Nic: Whatevr I know ur a freak

Well, leave it to ur imagination

Nic: Fine, I’ll just imagine ur into shitting thru ppl’s sunroofs lol

Works for me :-)

You text back and forth for a while as you eat your dinner. Then you finish the episode of trash TV you’re watching, and sip the rest of your brandy. Once the show’s over, you hop in the shower.

You can’t help yourself from fantasizing while you’re in there. You think about all the things you want to try, all the things you’ve been too afraid to ask for. There was stuff you even held back from Liz, though she was the one you opened up to more than anyone else. But you never shared with her the darkest thoughts. The literal torture you’d like to endure, the true breaking point you want to be pushed too. It’s too real, too raw, too heavy for most people.

You’ve always wondered why you’re like this. Why isn’t light bondage and spanking enough for you? It’s all too tame. You want to really feel like you’ve given up control, like your life is in someone else’s hands. You’ve psychoanalyzed yourself about this enough. You could blame your parents for raising you an over-achieving only child, always type A, always with a plan. Nothing was ever up to chance, nothing was ever out of your hands. For once, you want someone to take it all away from you.

And the pain, god you love pain. You couldn’t really explain why. Maybe your safe, comfortable life has made you an adrenaline junkie, an endorphin addict. Everything is always so predictable, and the pain snaps you out of it, makes you feel alive, puts you right back in your body. It’s just so good. You’ve never explored it to the full extent that you’d like to. You want to know what it’s like to get seriously injured. To heal. The body’s ability to heal has always fascinated you.

You know you could get away with it too. Working from home, you’d be able to recover from all kinds of heinous injuries in peace. No one would be the wiser. You just need to find someone willing to inflict that kind of suffering upon you. To rend your flesh, steal your breath, maybe even break your bones. You just want to know what it feels like. This is the shit you don’t tell people. Here you are, scrubbing yourself with eucalyptus sage body wash and imagining someone breaking your leg in a sexual context. Some Stephen King, Misery, type shit.

You towel off and throw back a couple sleeping pills. You don’t want to be up all night thinking about who will reply to your post on the forum. Sliding between the silk sheets of your bed, you feel calm and strangely optimistic. You succumb to sleep much quicker than usual, all the while hoping it could be possible for you to find your freak.

***

Morning comes, as usual, all too soon. You reach for the blaring alarm clock and silence it. Early morning sunlight streams through your window, and your second alarm clock, Mia, jumps up onto the bed and starts pawing at your face. You allow her to curl up on your chest, scratching her head until she begins meowing in your ear for breakfast.

“Alright, alright,” you tell her, pulling yourself out of bed. In the kitchen you procure Mia’s half can of fishy smelling wet food, avoiding taking in a full whiff of its odor. She runs to the dish on her little paws and gobbles it down appreciatively. Then you put on the coffee pot and head to the bathroom.

Slowly, you awaken and come fully into your body, going through the motions of your morning routine. Drink half a cup of black coffee, get dressed, jog around the block, shower, put on your work clothes, and finish the rest of the pot of coffee throughout the morning as you sit at your desk.

The light run, your cold shower, and the strong coffee have you humming to life with your computer like always. Mia naps in the sunlight at your feet. You check your inbox first thing, and see that you have a couple messages from the kink site. You can’t believe it, honestly. It takes everything in you to not open them, and instead direct yourself to your work. Excitement bubbles up inside you, but you quickly remind yourself not to get your hopes up too high.

Weirdos are about a dime a dozen, and that’s bound to be who’s messaging you. But maybe the right kind of weirdo… You steer your thoughts back to your screen, loading up the morning check in meeting. You’ll leave those unread messages as a special treat for once you’re off the clock.

The day drags by, all you can think about are the mystery messages waiting for you. 4 ‘o’ clock can’t come soon enough, and once it arrives, you're navigating to the kink site without a second thought. You don’t even bother to change into your comfortable clothes or switch the lights.

The first message is a bot, and your heart sinks. The second message is from some guy with a handlebar mustache that puts you off immediately and the screen name BigMistressMaster, but you figure you should give him a chance. His profile is full of giantess fetish posts, so you really don’t think he’s who you’re looking for. In no hurry to reply, you get up to put yourself into relaxation mode. You’re going to need a double brandy for this.

Mia follows you dutifully as you change, put on a record and pour yourself a drink. Sitting down at the computer, you type a friendly hello to Mr. Mustache. He tells you his name is Ivan, and even the name makes you roll your eyes. Maybe it’s his real name, you think, telling yourself not to be so mean. You chat with Ivan for a bit, drifting to other tabs and leaving space between your replies. You keep the conversation dry while Ivan flirts and tries too hard to win you over. After a couple hours, you lie about the time zone you’re in and tell him you’re going to bed.

The boredom thrums painfully in your chest again. You get up and walk to the freezer, pulling out your bottle of brandy and pouring yourself another double, neat. You don’t usually drink this much, especially on a weekday. Spending so much time alone makes for a slippery slope, and you make an effort to not form a habit, but tonight you indulge in your disappointment. Walking over to the record player, you put on some whiney, sad boy music and let it fill your deflated heart. You think of Liz and take another drink.

Avoiding the computer, you walk a slow lap around your apartment and decide to water your neglected house plants. Then you make dinner and turn on the TV like always. You send Nic a self pitying text message.

Convinced I’m going 2 die alone

Nic: Online dating not going well huh

It’s abysmal

The one reply I’ve gotten is from the most boring white bread man on earth

Nic: White bread on the kink site?

Nic: That’s crazy

More common than u think

Nic: Why don’t u try a real dating app

🙄 ugh

Nic: idk what u have against it

Dating is just so hard

I want something else

Nic: She’s so mysterious…

Nic: So aloof….

Nic: Not like other girls

Stoppp

I hate 2 admit it but I still miss Liz somtimes

And you do hate to admit it. You hate that you’re thinking of her right now. You wish you could give yourself everything you want, be completely self-sufficient. You try, but some things just can’t exist in a bubble like that. You crave excitement, and you haven’t figured out how to get it without bringing someone else into the picture.

Nic: Aw babe

It sucks

Nic: Don’t drunk text her ok, call me instead

Nic: idc what time it is

Thanks <3

You weren’t planning on drunk texting. Although, those things are never planned. You want to defend yourself and argue that you’re not even drunk, but when you get up to bring your dishes to the sink, the world swims beneath you for a brief moment. No more texting, you note to yourself. Really, you should just delete her number already.

You leave your phone on the couch and go back to the computer, planning to check some clothing auctions you’ve been watching. However, the KinkBound page is still up on your screen, and you see you have another new message. The screen name isn’t anything clever or fancy, just Art. At that you feel some relief, just a normal person for once. You open it, hating yourself for feeling another rush of excitement.

Art: I’m interested in your request.

Short, to the point. There’s no profile picture, which should be a red flag, and the account hasn’t made any posts. Still, you can’t stop yourself from typing back.

Hi, glad to hear you’re interested. Have you been on this site long?

You get a reply right away.

Art: No, not long. Why do you want someone to hurt you?

What a weird question. The answer should already be baked in, but you suppose he wants to know more about what you’re looking for. You’re not completely sure how to answer.

It’s exciting… I like how it feels

Art: Exciting… tell me more.

I guess it’s the adrenaline, you know. I really don’t have a lot going on. I get bored, and I guess I’m looking for something to make me feel more alive.

You can’t believe you’re being so candid. Your pulse pounds in your ears, and you stare at the screen, waiting for Art’s response.

Art: More alive, that’s interesting. You don’t feel alive?

You realize how desperate and angsty you sound. You get up and refill your glass with brandy. Already, you feel like this guy can see right through you somehow. You gulp down the brown burning liquid and start typing.

Well, maybe that’s a little dramatic, but everything just feels dull. I do the same things every day. It’s boring. And honestly I’m lonely.

Dear god. You didn’t even reread that one before you sent it. Well, you might as well lay your cards on the table.

Art: Bored isn’t good.

What do you do when you’re bored?

Art: Oh, I’m never bored. I make sure of it.

Normally a statement like that would make you roll your eyes, but instead you’re genuinely intrigued.

Wow, well that sounds nice. You’ll have to show me how you do it.

Art: Maybe.

What do you do, Art?

Art: You wouldn’t want to know, it’s boring.

Okay, fair enough, my job is boring too

He’s a tough one to crack. Usually these people are spilling every detail about themselves, aiming to impress. Art’s approach is refreshing, and it’s definitely working on you. You swirl your glass, and can’t help but smile as you see him typing a reply.

Art: You’re lonely?

Fuck. So lonely, you want to scream. You want to disappear, to drown yourself in your drink.

Yeah, honestly, I hope it’s not too pathetic to admit that. I had a bad break up a while ago and I just haven’t gotten things back on track.

Art: It’s okay to admit that.

You want to jump through the screen and hug him. Who is this person? Why are you suddenly compelled to bear your soul to him? God, you really are lonely.

Okay good, I don’t want to scare you off

Art: You won’t.

You find that hard to believe, but for now you’ll take him at his word. You check the time and decide to wrap it up for now. You want Art to stay mysterious, living in your brain as three letters on a screen and the promise of something more.

Well, it was nice meeting you Art, do you want to talk tomorrow? Same time?

Art: Sure, same time. It was nice meeting you too.

You close the tab and just sit there for a moment, processing the new, exciting possibilities that have opened up for you. Biting your lower lip you smile to yourself, and then finish the drink that remains in your glass. For a moment, you consider texting Nic, but you decide you want to keep this to yourself, at least for now.

Getting yourself ready for bed, all you can wonder is whether Art will live up to your expectations. You know literally nothing about him, so you try to stop your mind from running out ahead of you, but it’s no use. You’re lying awake, thinking of him, wondering what he could be doing, and if he could be thinking of you too.

#art the clown x reader #slashers x reader #slashers x you #art the clown x you #slasher smut #horror smut

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souryogurt64 · 3 months ago

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Hi long-time lurker, first time follower. When you say the hardliners still profit from their connections to Fall Out Boy, does that mean in a “name-dropping” way or do you think FOB is actively doing things for them?

To answer your question in very narrow and brief way, this guy I will call R (for the sake of this post) wrote a very long feature article on Fall Out Boy's origins as well as other stuff too. Another guy called S owned the label they put Evening Out on.

In the 90s, R used to make zines and be in bands with this guy I'll call S (for the sake of this post). S owned the label Fall Out Boy put Evening Out on. Both of them identified with a movement that held very extreme beliefs that were both positive and harmful. In these zines, they often advocated for the extermination of gay people, insisted gay people were indoctrinating children, compared abortion to the Holocaust, believed women should not be allowed to access birth control, and wrote offensive things about women who disagreed with their views, such as calling them "lard cunts." They also advocated for positive things like racial justice, police abolition, and environmental preservation.

Andy was in a band with S when he was like 15 years old and a lot of the zines were put out in association with this band. When Pete was like 14 and a literal child, he was in a band that probably identified with this movement, and a lot of his other bands were not explicitly identified with this movement, but shared a lot of scene real estate with them. I'm pretty sure R and S were like 5 years older.

As Pete and Andy became young adults (17-19), they started their own bands that focused entirely on positive things like racial justice or veganism, but still shared spaces with bands who held certain beliefs about abortion, birth control, women, and gay people. Then, as actual adults (21-23), they started Fall Out Boy, which sought to be positive and inclusive to everyone, and later used Fall Out Boy's influence to advocate for both pro-choice and pro-gay activism.

They ended up not wanting to release Evening Out on S's label, and while they have never gotten too explicit about it and have primarily focused on the quality of the demos, I am pretty sure a big part of it was S's beliefs. Evening Out came out on the label anyway, it made a bunch of money, and a lot of that money was used to fuel this subculture, which they were not okay with but did not have a choice in because they signed a contract with S to further the band.

As decades progressed, R and S slowly dialed back the more problematic elements of their beliefs a lot. R became a journalist at the same publication as the ghostwriter of Pete's book, most likely while still identifying with this movement. S is often quoted as an authority on Fall Out Boy.

In 2013, R wrote what is one of the most influential and widely circulated pieces of journalism on Fall Out Boy's history. In 2023, Fall Out Boy re-released this piece as a book. They made a lot of edits, which included removing a misogynistic comment from Pete as well as references to politics in hardcore. Around when they did this, scans of the piece on Reddit that had been widely viewed and circulated for the last decade were taken down due to copyright. This piece quoted from S a lot, and S is often quoted as an authority on FOB in general. R definitely profited from the release of this book though he is no longer affiliated with the movement discussed in this post, and he probably wrote a lot of other journalism about FOB, and he probably got into journalism partially through publishing these hateful zines about women and gay people.

I'm focusing on R and S in this post for the sake of giving examples to provide simplicity because they are some of the biggest names, but benefits of Fall Out Boy's legacy carries over to a lot of people associated with hardcore, and I think Fall Out Boy's hardcore roots are often sanitized in order to protect Fall Out Boy's image as well as hardcore's image, especially in relation to women and feminism.

And that's often not good when most people dominating music history are straight men, and people like R who was arguably part of a hate group are the ones who get to decide which perspectives are and are not included in seemingly "objective" documents like oral histories, which is often problematic as these documents posit that women just didn't exist, when in reality, Riot Grrrl and hardcore existed at the same time and were often reacting to each other on issues like race and women's rights. Obviously, there are problematic elements of Riot Grrrl too.

Anyway, it's often treated as if women or gay people in emo didn't exist and never accomplished anything because "They were no women at Warped because they weren't good enough to play" "There were no women on X label/tour/whatever because they weren't good enough" "There were no girls in bands in the 90s" "That girl's band isn't "really" emo so she doesn't matter and she shouldn't be in the book" And there's no consideration of how major players in "emo" viewing feminists as "lard cunts," or things like that thing about that guy who ran Warped intentionally pairing up bands with MCR with homophobic bands to cause heckling and drama, impacted who is considered "really emo" today and which smaller male bands have been chosen as important, legacy acts despite not being commercially successful, versus how female fronted bands that aren't commercially successful are dismissed as failures that don't matter, and how this is currently impacting things like WWWY or the Warped comeback.

And fans of MCR, FOB, and Panic often do not engage with these discussions in a constructive way, partially due to how they are wholly informed by (see above discourse about The Narrative).

Someone wrote a 250 page zine mostly about the movement I've discussed and touches on Fall Out Boy's relation to it and made it available for free, it's very well written and well cited as well as taking a very balanced perspective.

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thevoidscreams · 3 months ago

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Hi!! I'm a recent lurker and love how u write stuff. Hope I'm on time for the mating press march (⁠*⁠´⁠ω⁠｀⁠*⁠)

You're a perpetual who had been accidentally stuck inside the Warp until one day u manage to see a bunch of babies getting yeeted through the Warp (wtf?). U aren't evil so of course u aren't going to leave a bunch of cute babies getting hauled and probably corrupted by the 4 freaks that reside in that awful place. U go collecting kiddos as if they were pokemons (u only manage to get a few of them, not all) and decide to rise them because why the fuck no? Fast forward, some asshole comes claming to be the father of your sons and that he will take them. A fight breaks at first but somehow you both end up fucking to an inch of your life and this emperor guy has decided that the best solution to this problem is that you become his consort... You're actually pretty okay with that.

Have a wonderful day! ♡⁠(⁠Ӧ⁠ｖ⁠Ӧ⁠｡⁠)

I had a few ideas for this but I'm only doing one so, I hope it pleases the masses. Reader is a perpetual from the modern day and there are references to such. Also I wanted this one to have some bits of comedy as it just helped the story flow a bit better. Also this WILL have some grim dark elements.

Smut isn't the focus of this piece.

Day 28 Year 2: Warnings: Descriptions of injuries, implied cannibalism, violence, implied sex Word count: 5599

Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to piss off a minor warp god in college? Sure it'd been funny, really fucking funny, but now you were here, and here wasn't where you wanted to be.

Here was the warp, and your ass was spending eternity in it because of a rickroll gone wrong. Lesson learned though, don't bong a fifth and do stupid rituals written in tomes bound in suspicious leather in the woods.

You'd made it out in considerably better shape then your friends. That part did still haunt you. The crackling of bones, and the wet tearing of flesh.

Not that you thought any of that bullshit was real until then.

Well, hindsight is 20/20 as they say.

The worst part of being trapped in.. hell? Purgatory? The warp? It didn't matter this place sucked wholesale ass, but the worst part aside from the boredom was the things that skittered about out here. You'd gotten pretty good at dodging them and figuring out how to move around in this place. But it was like the deep trenches of the oceans on earth. One minute, nothing, the next second? Boom giant ass squid, ready to eat your face and nibble the bones.

If only you could find a way out. There was a terrible crack, like thunder but longer and deeper.

Then lights erupted in the distance, subtle at first but then brighter and hotter as they drew closer. Some instinctual part of you knew that you had to get to them. To catch the pods as they rocketed towards you. Creatures like living nightmares clawed at the capsules, trying to pry free whatever prize was inside the metal and glass.

Deamons. That did it. You swam through the currents faster than you ever had. your body collided with one. The many limb form was jarred loose, claws screeching as it scrambled for purchase, its grotesque from falling free. A second slithered around the side only to be met with a foot to the face. As it leapt from the capsule you finally had a chance to glance down through the frost caked glass and into the eyes of a tiny person. A child. You pushed the capsule through the tides, knocking into two more, crushing one of the daemons and sending the others hurtling from the smooth metal surfaces. The three you'd pushed together were sadly the only ones you'd managed. The others had been pulled away by other currents and had vanished. There was a pulling, almost sucking sensation on your skin as the waters of the immaterial plane parted and suddenly you were weightless in a new way. And deathly cold, colder than you ever had been. The zero pressure of space around you was a pain you had never known, not before and hopefully never again.

Then you were falling. Holding onto the capsule you fell down down down, through the atmosphere of a world, your skin popped and boiled on reentry, cooking part of your back. Then it was mercifully over, until it wasn't. You woke up in a fresh set of clothes, clean and alive. What remained of your old body was a half cooked, half splattered mess. "Yeesh." You groaned to no one in particular, then it all came back to you. The pods. The kids. You ran for what looked like the crash sight. The earth around them was badly damaged. But you hurried through the debris to find them. The first you found was the one you'd been riding. On it's front the Roman numerals XII. Twelve, you realized, How ever many of the pods there had been this one was number twelve. You searched for a way to open it, but you didn't need to. It opened with a hiss of freezing air and out stumbled the boy. BArely more than a toddler, yet he stood with purpose. A compossure and understanding of what was around him to an almost unnerving degree. "Hello." You spoke softly, taking a knee before him. You pulled off your light over coat and laced it around him to cover his naked form. 'Oh god please let him be a Superman and not a Zod.' You worried, looking at the pod he'd been in. "You got siblings?" You asked and he turned looking in the direction of what appeared to be another crash. He began to toddle that way and you walked beside him, offering him your hand. He took it and you walked together to the two other crash sights. There you gathered, number four and number fourteen. You were glad your weird ability allowed you to come back with your clothes, or else you would have had to trek around with three naked babies. And that wasn't ideal.

"Okay you three... now what?" You looked up to the darkening sky. Damn did you really not pay attention in astronomy class or what? The stars here looked all wrong and your sense of direction was totally fucked.

So you headed for what looked like a mountain. With no signs of civilization in sight you would just have to find somewhere and hope that the night wasn't too cold. WIth a cave located you settled the boys down. Using branches and some kind of moss to make makeshift beds. "Okay, you all stay here. I am going to go grab some of that fire out there, and hopefully bring it in here." They looked at you and nodded. Well they understood you and that was good. The trip back down the shallow slope wasn't too hard, but it might become harder the longer you're here. Finding fire wasn't the hard part. The impact has set trees on fire and they still smoldered. The problem was getting it back to the cave. You found a good stick, setting it into the flames only half way till it burned with fire at the end. "Nice." You trekked back up the mountain using the impromptu torch to light the way. When you got back however, the three were sitting around a fire. They turned to look as you approached. "Oh..okay." You came closer to them and set the large branch into the flames. "So more fire for the fire I guess." You sat a few feet away from it looking at the odd children. They looked at you expectantly. You felt responsible for them, and there was something clearly unique about the boys. You needed to take care of them. How you would do that you weren't sure. But you'd have to get it figured out. The press of small warm bodies startled you for a moment, they were all pressed against you, and you opened your arms to let them in closer. First things first you supposed they'd need names.That first week went by in a blur and the kids were already bigger. Perturabo, as he'd taken to calling himself, was already analyzing the world around him as if he had been alive for centuries longer than he had. Maybe it was the fact that you'd cut yourself and they all gathered around to sample your blood which had freaked you out terribly. Yet that was when they'd begun to speak in fragmented sentences.

Though the fact that they could speak more didn't shock you, it was how fast they were growing. Food on the mountain side was scarce, small rodent animals skittered among the crags and stones but they were far too fast to catch by hand. If only the girl scouts taught rope tying like the boy scouts you thought wistfully. Maybe you could have made a snare.

Perturabo had also begun calling his brothers by new names. Given that none you tried felt right for these clearly non average humans.

Mortarion had brought back plants. "Eat these." You took them, placing them on a stone by the fire. "Thank you Mortarion, you did a good job finding these." You praised and he smiled. "Thank you mama." He darted off to look for more before you could correct him, did you even want to correct him?

A week later the first storm hit. The kids were as tall as your waist in height. And seemingly

growing by the minute. A thick layer of snow washed over the mountain. You shivered, the cold could kill, but the fire wood gathered did help. Angron pressed his face into your side. Every time he touched you it seemed that some ache or pain evaporated and your worries eased. The plants you'd gathered were running out. There was enough for a day, but with how hungry they were, it would be hard to keep them satisfied. You looked down at your own hands. Then to the knife of flint Perturabo had made you. They looked hungry.. you would come back, with more clothes and.. and you were a sizable chunk of calories. They looked at you, and the twisted knowledge of what you had to do for your boys set in. You would come back.

You knelt before them on their now remade 'beds'. "Boys, I have to do something, and I know it will be upsetting to see, but I need you to trust me." The storm howled outside the cave. It hadn't let up. "You're going to hurt yourself." Perturabo surmised and you nodded. His face scrunched and there was a look of quiet grief in his eyes. "I won't be gone long. I promise." You stood and Mortarion took your hand, then Angron. "No." they whispered quietly. You smiled sadly. "We need to eat." It was all you said before pulling away and heading for the back of the cave. They should have to see this. You tossed some of the bones onto the fire. They popped and crackled as the water in them evaporated. You still felt shaky about the meat incident as you called it. But your boys looked full and they had energy. You took the old clothes and tried as best as you could to outfit their ever growing bodies. It wouldn't be enough. The winds died down first and the sun came out for the first time in over two weeks. Many more bones piled in the cave, and your skulls had made for fine cups to melt the snow into water. It had been a month and the boys who had started as hardly more than infants were now old enough to be squabbling. "Boys, that's enough. We need to go. Gather your stuff." They did as you bid, hurrying to gather what few belongings they had. Perturabo was at the front. "The south is that way." He pointed. You let him take the front, as he seemed to know where he was going. Occasionally he'd look up to the sky and mutter but you never saw anything. After hours of hiking you stopped. They looked at you and you shook your head. "Rest." You told them. It was mid afternoon by the look of the sun. The woods around you were coming alive. It was full of alien bird song and despite the snow. It was lovely. You rested your head back against a tree and Angron hugged you. You wrapped an arm around him. They were calm, listening and then there was a snuffling. You picked up your head but the boys were already alert. Facing the sound. An animal, something like a boar but with longer legs strolled from the snowy brush. It turned its eyes in your direction. Parting jaws full of conical teeth. It seemed to find the idea of you worth the trouble. It charged. You were ready to bolt, but sweet Mortarion was the first to move. He fisted a rock up from the ground and brought it down right over the animal's eye. It wheeled, screaming as it made to charge him. Angron came in next. Swinging his clenched fist into the knee of its back left leg. It went down with a hearty crunch and another high pitched whistling scream. Perturabo joined the fray, the flint blade he'd made cutting down through its neck and it dropped. The boys shouted, hooting and whooping as they stood over the slain beast. You were staring in shock. They were only children.. but they weren't only human. You remembered. Mortarion and Angron seemed the most delighted. "Look mama, we killed it. Now you won't have to hurt yourself so we can eat. It's okay."

The boy's words were like a hot knife to the gut. Tears stung your eyes and they all looked confused. They came to you, arms open to embrace you. "It's okay boys I'm okay. You all did such a good job, I'm proud of you." In truth you weren't and hadn't been for a long time, but that didn't matter now. You had your boys and that was enough, you would care for them no matter what. The pig thing lasted only two days. Your kids were still growing. Soon the clothes you'd provided wouldn't be big enough.

It was then you found salvation. A town, sizable to be sure. There would be things here for you to better dress your boys. But.. you didn't have money.

The words you read on posters looked so frustratingly familiar but there was nothing you understood. Perturabo stepped up beside you, seeming to get that it was a job board. He knew that from the memories he had of your life before. He and his brothers had come to understand your life up until now after consuming so much of you, including your brain. You stayed staring at the board as if it would give up its secrets to you. Perturabo gathered Angron and Mortarion. "We need money but none of us speak this language. I can read it, kind of, but mom cannot." "What do you suggest?" Mortarion asked his brother. "We need to learn this language." It was all he said, but the understanding was immediate.

When you turned with a frustrated sigh you expected to see your boys. But all that met you was an empty alleyway and the quiet of the night. "Boys?" You called softly, surely they had to be nearby. Panic gripped your heart as the only reply you got was silence and more darkness. "Boys!?" You called again and began to search frantically. The three could hear you and it hurt to ignore your call. They took the opportunity to find someone suitable. Someone no one would miss. And they found it in the form of a ganger alone in an alleyway, nothing to light his figure in the dark but the burning of a foul smelling stick between his lips. You nearly collapsed with relief when you saw Mortarion and grabbed him. He looked upset about something but you just knelt by him and held his face in your hands. "Mortarion, where were you? Where are the others?" Tears streaked down your cheeks and warm arms embraced you from behind, Angron was hugging you. "We're sorry mama. It won't happen again." Perturabo was the last to appear. You hugged them all so tight.

"Don't ever run off like that again, okay?" They nodded. And you found a tavern that seemed to have rooms. Mortarion put a wad of something in your hand and you gasped. It was money. "Did you steal this?" You asked him and he nodded. "You shouldn't steal." You told him but he didn't feel as remorseful as he pretended to be.

"Still it should get us a room.. I hope." You pushed through the doors. It was like some odd blend between a tavern of old and a motel. The bartender? Clerk? Looked up at you then down at your clothes and then to the three children with you all dressed the same.

He said something but you didn't understand it. Perturabo took your hand. "He wants to know if he can help us with something." At this point you didn't question it. "Yes. We need a room. And I would like to know if he's got any positions open for work. Just until we can get our feet under us."

Perturabo relayed the message and the clerk looked at a screen typing something. He spoke to Perturabo who nodded.

You stepped up to the counter and the man looked you over. You must look terrible. "He says they need a general cleaner and that you may work for room and board. But if we want to stay longer than that he knows a better place to do so." "How about we just start with a room for tonight. And the job tomorrow."

The bar clerk, as you took to calling him, got you a key to a room with a few beds and he took what cash you owed him. Which wasn't as much of your cash stash as you assumed. The first thing you did was bathe and instructed the boys to do so as well. Then you slept. Like a rock. With all three of your boys piled on your bed. When you woke the next afternoon you stumbled down to the lobby and found that the man from the night before had been replaced by an older woman. She had a motherly sense about her and she smiled. She motioned you forward and took out a box of old clothes for the boys. And a few pieces for you as well. Perturabo translated that they were 'hand me downs' from her own sons including the one you'd met the night before. And the woman's clothes were from her daughter who no longer wanted the pieces.

It was such a thoughtful gift you teared up and she shushed you and gave the four of you breakfast.

That was the first of many that you would have in that inn. It was also unfortunately the first day you would understand the problem of living in a town or city. The 'Tax Collectors' were petty thugs working for the government. They came through the towns outside the cities regularly and took what they wanted, often taking more than was needed and pocketing the excess. The innkeeper and her children seemed to just let it happen. So worn down by the constant abuse that it seemed normal. Your sons watched, a deep anger in their eyes as they observed the cruelty. "Just stay behind the counter, don't want a repeat of your husband. Awful soon to make your children orphans wouldn't you say?" He lazily gestured what looked like a flintlock pistol at the elderly mother and your hands clenched into fists. You hadn't understood what he'd said but the look you saw from the three was absolutely murderous. And they intended to do something about it. The assault had only taken a minute, maybe less, but the five men sent to scour the town and her people of their valuables for their governor were piles of bloody rags and meat on the floor. The inn keeper had fainted at the show and you laid her down on a few throw pillows until she woke up. It wasn't a pretty sight and the four of you set about cleaning it up. Little did you know this would become a common occurrence. Five months down the line and the three looked like nearly full grown men. The innkeeper took your explanation of them being your sons with a grain of salt. But she was glad for the peace their presence brought to the town. Maybe you would tell her one day the whole truth. It was also from her, though you were still gathering the language, that you had been correct in your assumptions that this was not earth. That part did confuse you. And there was no way to know how long you had been disconnected from reality until you contacted someone from the wider universe, if anyone was still out there.

"This won't stand. I won't allow tyrants to rule this world and her people." You overheard Mortarion say it. His conviction is clear as day. "I agree, we allow our town to live in relative peace but others do not know such a luxury. And the men they keep sending are getting better armed and more numerous." Angron added. Perturabo listened and stood from the makeshift forge he'd set up outback of the inn. "We will arm ourselves, and take the fight to its source." You trembled at the thought. Of your boys going off to fight some terrible army of gangsters and blood thirsty law enforcement. They noticed as you rounded the corner a look of concern in your eyes. "Hey kiddos." You were pulled into a hug by all three. "We must do this. To keep this world and you free and safe." You tried to understand but it still didn't make it easier. "This is our purpose, what we were made for."

Has it really been only half a year since the pods? It felt like a lifetime. "You protected us, now let us protect you." They headed off the week after, with weapons and armor forged by the hands of your 'oldest'. Then they were gone, for three months you fretted, cleaning the inn from top to bottom over and over until there wasn't a single nook or cranny you hadn't scrubbed twice over.

You helped ease your mind by making up fake yelp reviews in your heads about it. Four stars, the place was so clean but the cleaning lady did the dishes while our breakfast was still on them. Otherwise a great stay and friendly staff. You were giggling to yourself about it when the front doors blew open. Three towering figures crouched in and you nearly fell off your ladder from where you were changing the candles. Angron grabbed you first, hugging you tight. "MA!" He laughed and the others soon joined. Even the relatively dour Perturabo. "Oh my boys!" You cried and hugged them, kissing their foreheads, even if they were bigger than you now. They told all, not leaving a single detail blank, from the day they left to the day the took the capital. "There's a place for you there mama." Mortarion said, hugging you. "A fine manor where you will be safe and where we can take care of you now." "There's also labs with technology beyond what we have here. We can go, and find a way back to your world, or to find others like us." You nodded. "Let's not leave tonight. We'll leave in the morning."

The staff was sad to see you go. But the town at large was celebrating, the heros who'd freed them from the tyrants and allowed them to live in peace.

It had never been more apparent then when you looked at them now that they weren't humans. Not like you.The capital looked more like cities you remembered. Cities of metal and stone and glass. You didn't get attached to the place, you didn't think you'd be there long enough.

Perturabo was completing one of his first ships from old schematics he found in the labs. Improving it where he could. You helped Angron and Mortarion in their attempts to rework the government. You colossal sons seemed to have a hard time in talking to regular humans as they all trembled before them, in both fear and awe. It took entirely too long to get it figured out. Months in fact.

But it did get done. Men and women from every major town and city came together as a sort of united governing body. Elected by their towns own smaller councils.

You felt good about it by the time you left. What you didn't feel good about was traveling in space. It made you think too much of the warp and its horrors. But your sons would keep you safe and you would keep them safe in turn. Helping them learn to navigate their own more human aspects. Helping guide them to settle petty disagreements and squabbles. They still insisted on sleeping in the room with you. Having grumbles about how they could barely sleep when they were away to liberate the world. You let them. You loved them after all, they’re your boys.

The world you came to first was one called barbarous. Its toxic atmosphere and earth made for a terrible death world. You had to wear a mask the whole time and even then it left your skin feeling itchy and irritated. The humans here lived in more fear than they did on the one you'd left behind. It took even more months to free this world, from the terrible claws of the oppression brought by the overlords. You'd patched them all up more times then you could count but their bodies didn't need as much time to heal. They handled the fumes and violence better. Mortarion seemed to feel a deeper connection to it. "I can't explain it, but it was like I was meant to be here." You heart-fully disagreed. But it was his own feelings on the matter and you didn't push.

The people were set up, made to rule themselves as you had done before.It went similarly for another world called Nuceria. Angron seemed to shiver at the feeling of being there. His hearts beat with rage as he saw men, women and children enslaved in the fighting pits.

This one was harder to topple, the people had to be brought up. Given the purpose and desire to fight. You were there over a year, almost two. The barbarians had ancient technologies that Perturabo fashioned into weapons. The conflict was bloody, but your sons took the day, Mortarion was glad to see more tyrants brought to heel and Angron became well loved by the people of the fighting pits. Even tasking his brother to find a way to remove the nails hammering into their skulls. He did, and the healing began as it did on Barbarus.

They upgraded their armor and weapons as you went. The ship Perturabo had made, became larger and more advanced. There seemed to be a deep need in him, a calling he could not deny.

It came about when you left the warp again in the orbit of a world called Olympia.

You immediately didn't like it. The world was fine, but the people, they were users, self involved and greedy. They looked at your boys and saw tools. You didn't want to stay, but Perturabo did, he wanted to see more of the world. Its city states were always warring, and Perturabo sought to see peace reign, and you gave in with a sigh. "Okay, if it will make you happy, Pert." You kissed his forehead and let him go about his business. His brothers helped, and in a matter of months the world was under the rule of one city. You didn't like the people, but there was one girl, the daughter of the city's leader, and you and her got on well. Maybe this place wasn't so bad if you avoided the asshats who wanted to get to know you to get closer to your sons. It was oddly enough here that your life would change again, and maybe for the best. You couldn't be sure. You'd been in the city with your three when at the top of the nearby mountain there was an incredible light. Your sons were drawn to it. Needing to know where it was coming from. You followed. He was radiant beyond belief, the man on the mountain. Your sons fell to their knees in awe of him. You had to resist harder than you ever had to resist anything not to also succumb. "My sons. I have looked for you, on many worlds. I heard tales of your great deeds." "Hold on!" You interjected. "Who are you?" You demanded, and the man seemed to consider you. Your sons reached for you to try and calm you. "I am known by many titles, but to most I am the emperor of mankind. And these," He gestured to the three men who you'd loved and raised, "are my sons. I thank you for bringing them together, but their destinies lie beyond here, they are my generals, and they have sons of their own to lead, armies made in their image for them to lead and bring the universe back under the banner of humanity. You have seen them do this, here and on other worlds." He was going to take them away. You could feel it and the anger bubbled up in you, it didn't matter if this being was so much greater than you. These were YOUR sons, who YOU had raised and loved and all of hell would freeze over before you let this stranger take them. "So what, you're just gonna take them and make them work for you?" You interjected." "Yes. And you will stay here, or on the world where you found them." He spoke with such finality that you felt your anger rise higher. "They're my sons." You growled, "You won't be taking them from me." Your eyes blazed, and the golden figure reached for you. His hand closed around your throat. The clatter of metal behind you told you that your sons were on their feet now. "Put her down." Angron's low rumble came, demanding. The emperor looked from you to them. In their eyes he saw loyalty, love and devotion. "I see. This is very interesting then." He hadn't expected to find them all here but it seemed as if you were the common factor.

He made a motion with his hand and you found yourself away from the surface. The room around you was dim, the walls gold. It seemed to be personal chambers. "You will tell me everything." He touched your forehead with one bare finger and you felt him push into your mind. Every memory scrutinized, every laugh, and trial, everything that you had sacrificed for the children you loved. Giving your own body to them to eat, teaching them how to interact with the world around them and each other. Even the fight in the warp. You'd brought three of his sons together, and they were raised as brothers as his other sons never got to. He felt your love, so deep and maternal. You writhed in his hands and he drew his finger away. You had done more for them than most had. "You are indeed their mother." You looked him in his eyes and he did something that shocked you, he set you down. Knelt before you and bowed his head in gratitude. "Thank you." He spoke as the blinding aura around him dimmed and you saw him properly, so it seemed, for the first time. He touched your cheek but you didn't recoil, and a soft stream of memories played in your mind, the theft of his sons, the anguish, the search for them, finding other that you did not know, but more than anything, finding the worlds where you had been, listening to stories and seeing their progress with such pride, the happiness at finally landing on the world of Olympia to find them.

Then and softest of all, the pleasure of seeing your memories and knowing that unlike some of his sons, these three had been loved so fully and cared for. "Thank you." He spoke again, his lips pressed to yours and your brain went haywire. Holy hell, how long has it been since you were kissed? Or touched in any other other than platonic. You'd accepted that your sons' clingy need to sleep by you likely meant you'd not have a love life for a long time if ever, but oh fuck it felt nice. You pulled away and he let you. Your brain swam with less than wholesome ideas. "You will come with us." He said, and you nodded, mind still swimming. "Okay." You agreed and he swept you up into the bed. His mouth on your neck as he kissed marks down your flesh to seal the deal. You had no idea how long it took. But by the end you were a sweating, panting mess, naked under him as he put another load in you. "I have been lonely these past years, very lonely. And I know that my sons who did not have others to love them would benefit from your care." He rolled onto his side and you were amazed at how quick you went from mad to okay with all of this. "We should probably tell our kids then." You sat up thinking about the three left planet side. "They have already been brought aboard." He explained. You nodded but before you could get up the man pulled you back down. "You are a perpetual." You shrugged. "I guess, if by that you mean I can't die like others then yeah."

He nodded. "That is good, it means I will have you for longer and that my sons will not have to mourn your passing as they would a regular human." You felt his warm seed leak from you and then you realized. He didn't use protection, your cheeks flushed a deep red. He sensed your sudden realization and laughed warmly. "Well you already love three of my sons. I'm sure you could love more."

You huffed. What an asshole. But you kissed him again…for your sons’ sake.

#warhammer 40k #warhammer #my writing #mating press march #warhammer 40k x reader #primarchs #emperor of mankind x reader #emperor of mankind #angron #mortarion #perturabo

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snoopychris · 3 months ago

Text

the hardest goodbye

in which... nick, matt, and chris set off for their quest

warnings: suggestive content, mentions of death, chris is an asshole

will solace didn’t mean to eavesdrop. will solace just wanted to tell Dionysus that he was leaving. he just wanted to thank him for the warm welcome and the housing provided for a few days. then he would be on his way. he had never expected to hear about a new prophecy. never in a million years. not when it felt like

percy had just completed his. it was all too familiar to Will. his wide eyes dart around the perimeter of the Big House, keeping an eye out for any lurkers. any sign that somebody else might’ve heard the secret and he wouldn’t have to keep it to himself. will solace had no such luck. not right away. not for a while. especially not since he blacked out.

it takes about ten minutes to pull Will from his blackout. for a moment there, he might as well have been dead. had nico not said that will wasn’t dead, his family would’ve been getting a letter. wherever they were. the porch of the big house was still occupied. you sa comfortably with will and nico, waiting for the door to finally be unlocked to get will some real help. the camps healer couldn’t heal himself. the screen door almost slams against your face when it opens, eliciting a loud yell from your throat. your eyes meet chris’ within seconds.

you had probably locked eyes with chris thousands of times. there had never been a look quite like this. you dart to your feet, eyes moving to the screen door again. dionysus comes out next, followed by nick and matt. matt looks confused. nick looks devasted. Dionysus looks pissed. whatever chris did to piss him off and get nick and matt involved in it all must’ve been bad. dionysus pauses for a moment, noticing there’s three more people on the porch than there should be.

the God slowly turns to face you, will and nico, furrowing his brows for just a moment. it’s enough for the three of you to know that this is bigger than what you had originally thought. your internal panic begins to set in, watching as chris stomps off towards his cabin. the words Dionysus yells towards chris aren’t comprehended in your mind, but you know they’re a sign. a message. a warning. when it clicks for you that he’s telling chris to come back, you do the only thing you’ve perfected over the years and rush to be in front of chris to convince him to listen.

“cmon turn around” you whisper, the grass beneath your feet crunching quietly. chris shakes his head, letting his gaze meet the floor.. you swallow as you take a few steps towards chris, gripping onto his wrist. “hey” you plead, batting your eyes. “get the fuck off me.” an exhale leaves your mouth, holding back some tears that had formed. you don’t even remember the last time chris cursed at you. he had cursed with you, but it was never at you. there was something different this time. something was wrong. very wrong. “chris…” “sunny, i said get the fuck off me!” he yells, pushing you flat onto the floor. you gasp at the action, watching as will rushes over to intervene.

“okay chris that’s enough. you’re upset. don’t take it out on her.” “what fuckin ever. the fuck does it matter what i think. apparently fucking nothing.” “hey! i said. that’s enough.” if chris was your number one defender, will was right behind him at number two. a guy has to defend his first kiss after all. you feel your heart break a bit when chris walks away and leaves you there. he’s never done that before.

the rest of the day goes by painfully slow. the entire time it feels like someone’s ripped your heart out of your chest and stomped on it. you hadn’t even done anything wrong. it felt like luke leaving all over again. could you mourn someone who wasn’t dead yet? were you just mourning chris without knowing? you pick and prod at your food for ages, and by the time you even take a bite the dinner period is over. chris had been eying you the whole time from tables away, pouting like a child each time he got no response. the puppy dog eyes that would’ve usually had you in his arms by now weren’t winning. not today.

“sunny are you gonna eat that breadstick?” nick whispers, pointing towards the garlicky item on your plate. you shake your head as the bread is taken from your plate to nicks, a sigh of relief leaving your mouth when you get dismissed. your feet carry you to your cabin quickly, avoiding anything and everything in your way. you don’t stop to talk to anybody once. you push the door open gently, taking a look around the empty room.

and suddenly you’re 10 years old again. suddenly you’re 10 years old being woken up by chris telling you that you have to go. that this cabin isn’t safe for you right now. you’re the 10 year old who didn’t eat for weeks. you’re the 10 year old who cried for days on end. the 10 year old who had been lied to and destroyed in the process.

you take a seat on the edge of an empty bed and just sit there. it’s weird, really. most of the time, you’re the most energetic person on the entirety of the camp. the girl everybody looks up to. a role model for so many young campers. your eyes go to a picture frame on the wall. it’s everybody who had been in the Hermes cabin when you were 8. you were there. luke was there. you can feel your heart break into a dozen more pieces when you see him. a deep feeling in your gut is saying that chris is lying to you the same way luke was all those years ago. a sob leaves your lips as you break into the tears you had been holding in, deciding that even if you were the strongest alive, you still needed to cry. the tears don’t last long, but it’s such a relief when you’ve gotten it all out. when you’ve let go all of the pain of years past.

the knock on your cabin door is weird to you. people don’t typically knock. not here. you stand up slowly, opening it up to see matt on the other side. his face turns to worry upon seeing the puffiness of your eyes, pulling you into a hug without question. no words are even spoken. you’re not typically a hug person, but still, you let it happen, further giving into the emotions you were feeling. yet, you still feel weak. he holds you for a while. you don’t even know how long it’s been by the time he lets you go. “you’re okay… you’re okay sunny.” he whispers, his thumb rubbing over your shoulder. it’s the first time you feel normal in your nineteen years of living. the first time you feel not like a fighter but like a person.

it’s past curfew when you’re tossing and turning. it reminds you of when you were 10. you’ve felt too much like a past version of you too much for your own liking tonight. nicks head peeks over his bunk to look at you, frowning slightly. “you didn’t eat.” he mumbles, doing what’s practically a front flip to get into your bed. you giggle as you scoot over to give him some room, cozying up as much as possible. his body heat is nice. his blonde hair is swayed slightly by the wind, a large smile on his face. he pulls an apple from his pocket, handing it to you carefully. “you okay? y’wanna gossip?” you shrug as you take a bite of the apple, the crunch being heard throughout the cabin. “what’s wrong? you’ve been down all day. did i do something? oh my god is it me? do you hate me is that why you didn’t talk to me at dinner. whatever i did i’m sorry i didn’t mea-“

“nick it isn’t you. i would tell you if you did something wrong.” you whisper, wrapping your arms around your frame. you sigh quietly as you glance out the window, tears brimming your eyes. “he’s never yelled at me like that before.” nick follows your gaze to the window, piecing it together. he hadn’t noticed how codependent you and chris were on each other. he wouldn’t be surprised if chris had only reacted to the quest the way he did because you weren’t there to calm him down. all nick can do in the moment is pull you in for a side hug, kissing the top of your head.

“go talk to him. i’ll cover for you if anything. go.” nick mumbles, standing up from the bunk to give you space to move. you smile slightly as you take another bite of the half eaten apple in your hands, pushing open the large cabin doors. you’re quick to get to chris’ cabin, not bothering to knock before walking in. he’s laying on his bed the way he usually is, a bouncy ball being thrown to his ceiling. the sounds that it’s making would be annoying you if it was your own cabin, but it was comforting in this once.

“took you long enough.” chris speaks, halting the throwing of his ball. you sigh before tiptoeing your way into his bed, his arms wrapping around you protectively. it’s silent for a few moments. not much is exchanged but both of you know about the tension that’s in the air. you’re both too stubborn to be the first to speak. chris only attempts to fix the situation by kissing all around your face, gently moving down to your neck. you swallow before pushing him away, shaking your head.

“you’re never gonna put your hands on me like that out of training again. i mean it. if it happens again… consider me gone.” it takes a lot for you to say. you’ve never even considered leaving before, but chris understands. he doesn’t say any words, but he continues kissing down your neck and collarbones. you know it’s his way of apologizing. it always has been. you let out a small exhale at his actions, looking down at him. his eyes are brimmed with tears. you don’t know if it’s regret or if there’s something else. you want it to be regret more than anything.

the sun tattoo that he has on his neck peeks out of his shirt. it matches the moon that’s on your ankle. his hair is a mess like he’s been nonstop running his fingers through it. something’s not right. something is extremely wrong. the look on your face is a physical embodiment of a lightbulb going off in your head. groups of three. matt, nick, and chris all walked out of the big house together. “you’re going on a quest…” chris swallows audibly, continuing his kisses down your body. he’s done it numerous times before but this time it’s different. this times it’s not a form of foreplay. it’s nothing that’s meant to be taken sexually or romantically. it’s a goodbye.

when chris suddenly stops his kisses and breaks into tears on your stomach, your heart shatters again. in an instant, you’re taken back.

in an instant, you’re the 14 year old girl who lost the only family she had ever had. you’re the 14 year old girl who had been waiting for your big brother to come home. the 14 year old who couldn’t believe the news she was getting. the 14 year old who begged percy jackson to go back and bring luke home. the same 14 year old who lost everything she had was still within you. and she was more alive than ever.

chris hadnt even left the campgrounds yet and he was already saying goodbye to you. you hold back a sob as to not egg chris on, rubbing his head gently. “it’s okay. it’s okay.. you’re gonna be fine. you’ve been training for this your entire life. you know you’re gonna make it back. if percy made it-“

“i’m not percy. and he… he had annabeth there with him and you’re gonna have to stay behind and i’m gonna be with two idiots who don’t know what they’re doing.” you can tell that chris is genuinely scared, but you don’t know how to react to something like this. you had never said goodbye to your best friend. all you can do is giggle quietly.

“nick… survived five years on the streets on his own. he knows how to pickpocket. he knows his way around manhattan and probably any big city you put him in. matt is ares’ son. it’ll all come naturally to him when it comes to. you’re gonna be just fine. i promise. i’ll be here waiting for you when you come back.” you whisper, pressing a long kiss to his lips. he relaxing against you, slipping his hand underneath the waistband of your sweats.

“gimme a parting gift?” he whispers, looking deep into your eye. you nod slightly, wrapping your arms around his neck as you pull him closer to you. you giggle quietly, nodding as you tangle your fingers into his hair.

“i think that can be arranged.”

the next morning came in what could only be described as the blink of an eye. you had never spent such a short nice with chris before. you didn’t even want to get up. it was too painful. there was too much to lose. it was excruciating. you only slip out of the much too familiar bed when you can’t bear the pain any longer. it’s early enough for you to be one of the only ones awake, but not early enough for there to be no food ready. your head and stomach tell you to gravitate towards the smell of bacon that’s hitting your nostrils. something in your heart and the deep pit of your gut is leading you in the opposite direction.

matt hadn’t gotten more than a few collective hours of sleep in the past few days. since his arrival, hes just felt overall uncomfortable. the bed is smaller than he’s used to, the mattress— if you could even call it that— was bumpy and hard, and this place just wasn’t home. he had never been more grateful for some sort of relief. some sort of way to take his anger out. he had always been enrolled in sports, starting with football when he was young. his parents had always given him the output that the training facility was giving him right now. the crunching behind him catches his attention, turning from the axe throwing target in front of him to look at you. he sends a small smile before he throws his final axe, letting out an exhale when he gets a bullseye.

“hey sunny” he runs one of his hands through his hair, and you hate to admit that you’re jealous of it. it looks so soft and cared for. you’ve never had that. chris hasn’t either. chris hasn’t had anything real. nothing really real. only artificial gifts from the Gods and other stuff campers have managed to bring in.

“heard about your quest” your words are blunt, but there’s not enough time to beat around the bush. you take a seat on a nearby tree stump, zipping up the hoodie you had stolen from chris. matt simply nods, licking his lips as he takes a seat next to you. he sets a hand on your knee, giving it a small grip before looking down at the floor. if chris was scared, you couldn’t imagine how matt felt. he had no where near as much experience with this stuff as chris.

“it shouldn’t be that bad right? i mean i did it for 20 years… keeping monsters away.” matt snickers quietly, a breath hitching in his throat. “but you’re not here for me. what’s up? you okay? wanna take my place?” you swallow at his words, shaking your head slightly. you almost feel bad asking. selfish almost.

“i need you to keep an eye on him for me. he’s never been out of this place for long. the longest we’ve ever been gone was one day trip to new york and even then we were supervised. he doesn’t know what it’s like to go to a grocery story or what it’s like to drive a car. to be quite honest with you he was freaking out about being the only one to know anything. but… the reality of the situation is that you know more about that place than he does. all he knows is monsters and fighting and… i worry for him. he’s all i have.” there’s a brief moment of silence, but you feel the sparks again. right there on your knee where matt’s hand is placed. matt feels it too. you know he does based on the way he flinches.

“i’ll take care of him. if we’re asking favors… do you have like a backpack or something i can use?” his question makes you laugh, but you nod regardless. he can’t have been mad at you for asking if he was cracking jokes.

“i’m sure i have something yeah. i’ll set you up and get you ready to go.” matt smiles at your words, pulling you in for a side hug. it’s a goodbye in the same way that chris had said goodbye to you earlier in the night. this one isn’t as heartbreaking, but you’d be lying if you said it didn’t feel even just a little bit similar.

it doesn’t take very long for you to get everything ready. at some point throughout the night, chris had told you they were leaving before dinner. you had been restless all day. a shaky sigh leaves the depths of your throat as you set three bags on your bed before handing one to chris, one to nick, and one to matt. will is sitting on the top bunk of an empty bed in your cabin, watching the interaction go down. more than anything, he’s there for emotional support. you’re practically sending your “best friend” off to a suicide mission.

“okay… you guys are all set. chris’ bag has all of the medical equipment you guys might need. he also has swords and other weapons in there. don’t lose that bag. i’m serious. nick, your bag has the food, the water, the money. you have both human money and drachmas. you’ll survive without it. matt. your bag has spare clothes. shirts, jackets, hats anything you might need. there’s an old pair of converse in there that i found under a bed if if comes to that.” your words are more tears than cohesive sentences, the pout on your lip more evident than anybody in the room had ever seen. you glance at will for an out, practically collapsing into chris’ arms when will takes over for you. in a swift movement, he jumps off the bed, taking your place.

“okay… um. i’ve never sent someone off before. the quest has a time limit of a month. not because something tragic will happen in a month but that’s just… the longest amount of time we can give you… or something. i don’t know. i don’t make the rules. wish i did. quests are taken in three. so that’s one, two, three of you. the issue is… we don’t exactly know what’s going on here. we don’t know what it all means or… anything. Dionysus said make it to California and back and that should.. hopefully be enough i don’t know.” Will sighs as he looks between the triplets, pulling matt in for a small hug. he follows suit by pulling Nick in for a hug, one that lingers for a little bit too long. at least, chris thinks it’s longer than usual. Chris notices the way that will is about to pull him in for a hug, but is unable to with you still clinging to his chest like hes your lifeline. he is your lifeline. will sighs quietly as he tugs you away from chris, pulling you into his own arms. “be careful out there man.” will whispers, eyeing chris intently. chris nods as he looks down at you, pursing his lips.

“take care of her for me okay? you’re the only other one here who i trust.” will nods at chris’ request, waving the triplets off with his hand. your tears only pour out more into wills tshirt. your world around you was practically collapsing. it was terrible. the last time something like this has happened, you didn’t say goodbye. you didn’t get the chance to. maybe it was better that way. maybe it’s what needed to happen.

“sunny i know now’s probably not a good time… but Dionysus said he needed to see you.” wills words hit like a dagger, making you whine quietly into his chest. you sigh as you pull away from him, wiping tears away from your eyes. they’re puffy as if you’d been crying for hours. mourning for hours. in reality you’ve been mourning for years. your walk is painfully slow, pushing past every camper who tries to get your attention. for the most part, nobody meets your gaze or even attempts to talk to you. you open the doors to the office, eyes avoiding the God sitting before you.

“you say bye to chris?” Dionysus asks. you nod slowly as you glance around the room, desperate for a distraction. “good. he’s a good kid. smart too. gave me a whole list of reasons he shouldn’t go and he should stay. didn’t work. anyway that’s not the point here. i left something of mine in a casino in Los Angeles. I need you to get it for me. go on.” he speaks, waving you off. your eyes furrow at his request, shaking your head in disbelief.

“but… i can’t… how am i supposed to get to a casino in los angeles by myself? do you even hear yourself? you’re putting my life at ris-“

“and you’re my best fighter and the only person left here who i trust. go on. hitch a ride with the other three. scram.” your eyes widen slightly at his words, and there’s an audible gulp in the room. it’s not a quest after all. it’s just a task. you’re going just for fun. you chuckle as you eye the door, biting your bottom lip. Dionysus knows you’re about to ask for something, looking towards the corner. “backpack full of supplies for you right over there. see you in a few weeks okay kid?” you nod rapidly at his words, grabbing the bag as you run out the door and towards the exit of the only home you had ever known. it makes you smile when matt, nick, and chris have barely gotten anywhere, simply arguing in front of the camp’s entrance. matt’s the first one to turn to you, letting out a small chuckle as he sees you.

“following your boyfriend, sunny?” matt jokes, pointing out to the scattered hickies on chris’ neck. you shake your head as you adjust your backpack strap on your shoulder, pursing your lips.

“mind if i ride with you guys?”

a/n: the sunnymatt vs sunnychris arguments will only get worse from here trust! also if you havent heard i do now have an instagram for this acc, its snoopyxchris if ur interested in following

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