#now all these people write these long ass responses on the replies so their followers don't even have to see what these ppl rly think

[anyarose011]

"Crawling Back to You" {Aemond x Reader}

Summary: It started with a night out in King's Landing, then a fake name, and then a disagreement. Some time after cooling off, and after a job gone wrong, you and the one-eyed prince come to...an understanding in the rain.

Part 2 of 3 (Masterlist)

Warning(s): Oral sex (f and m receiving), nudity, groping, talk of death, swearing, canon-typical injury, sexual harassment (not done by Aemond), and mention of past child SA

Heyyyyyy pookies. So I just started my senior year and it's been hectic. BUT I hope this long ass chapter (it took me forever) makes up for it! I'm also not sure how accurately I'm writing Aemond. I mean, I know HBO is making him into the edgiest edge lord, but I'm taking creative liberties i guess. Anyway, hope you enjoy!

Word Count: 8.5k

 “It’s a pleasure to finally put a name to your face. One that fits its beauty.” He smiled.

You lowered your gaze, fighting the smile on your lips. It was a stupid compliment, one that you had heard several variations of the rare times men would flirt with you those days. But…it felt different from him.

Still, you merely scoffed, setting the jug on your hip. “Do you want to lead the way, or should I?”

“Go ahead; considering you believe I’ll harm you somehow.”

“See?” You decided to tease instead of defy as you began to walk up the cobbled hill. “You are funny.”

Aemond scoffed, following you. “Did I ever deny it?”

“How you reacted when I first said it never gave me a clear answer.”

“Shouldn’t you change?”

You looked back at him. “What?”

Unashamedly, his eye trailed over your body and yours soon followed. Your nipples were perking through the thin material of the dress.

“Seven Hells.” You cursed, bringing the jug in front of yours.

Aemond came to your side, a hand on your back and leading you up the hill. “You don’t wear a corset?”

“Not with this. I’m meant to lure lustful men, remember?”

“Perhaps you can tell me where you tailor so we can get more appropriate clothing?”

Hell no.

“Or,” you suggested. “I could teach you how to properly steal something?”

“You need to be able to not draw attention to yourself to do that.”

“I’ve done it before.”

“I have no doubt, but the clothing off a man’s back?”

You paused for a moment before replying. “Yes, actually; I even managed all of one’s undergarments.”

Aemond shook his head, pulling his hood farther up to hide his smile. “I mean more so with that dress.”

“It might surprise you, but that is how I robbed him blind.”

“I mean in the sense that-.”

“-I understand.” You shut him up, but not aggressively. The two of you passed by more and more people through the many alleys of King’s Landing. When you got to the main roads, you would’ve lost Aemond in the crowd if it weren’t for the fact his hand had traveled from your back to your arm.

Maybe it was because he was paying you, or maybe it was because you didn’t know how touch starved you had been until it felt like his hand was simultaneously burning and soothing you; but you welcomed his touch.

As you continued to brave through the busyness of the city, you managed to spot a hobbling man wearing a long cloak with a drink in his hand. You smirked at your companion.

“Are you watching?”

He nodded, and how he looked you up and down briefly didn’t escape you. “I’m watching.”

You handed him the jug of water and approached the slightly incapacitated man. You pitched your voice up when you asked. “Ser?”

The man glanced up at you through hooded eyes, and he grunted in response.

“Are you alright?” You feigned concern, wrapping an arm around his shoulders to hold him up.

“Aye.” He sighed. “Much better now that you’re here.”

You giggled, leading him. “You’re too kind.”

“If it’s possible, could that kindness be repaid?”

“Let me at least have your name first,” you turned him down a spacious alleyway where there were less people. “Then I will know what to scream.”

“Gaius. You may-oi!”

You snatched the cloak right off his shoulders and took off in a mad dash down the rest of the alley. Turning your head over your shoulder for merely a second, you were graced to watch as the drunk man stumbled over his own footing before two hands in front of you grabbed your arms. Once you were pulled around the corner, you raised your hands to strike your assailant; to which he caught both of them.

“Is it truly that easy to rob Smallfolk?” Aemond asked, not letting go of your wrists.

Snickering, you pulled away from him. “I thought you said you were watching me?”

“I was.”

“Clearly not.” You slipped the cloak over your body, tying it. “You were lurking in the shadows.”

“I still saw you.” He retorted.

Shaking your head, you bent down and picked up your jug of water on the ground. Then, you stuck your hands into the pockets of the cloak. Your face lit up, and your retracted your hand, holding four pennies in your palm.

“Come with me.” Was all you said before walking past him and continuing down the street.

Aemond was by your side once more. “And where exactly are you taking me to?”

“Are you fond of sweets?”

“I enjoy them, but rarely indulge.”

“Then I will be more of a temptress tonight without having to show any of my skin.” You said excitedly.

All the prince did was smile; somehow trusting your ‘madness’. It was a short walk from where you were to a small stand in one of the several market corners of King’s Landing. Despite the long line, you pushed to the front, ignoring all of the comments and curses from the people.

“Evening, Marija.” You greeted the older woman. “Oh my, has someone bewitched you? You look younger!”

“What do you want?” She sighed your name tiredly, but a pleasant smile was on her features.

Sliding the four pennies onto the counter, you said. “Two dishes of Northern Snow.”

“Do you have two other pennies?”

“This was all I was paid.” You sighed. “You know how short everyone is on coin.”

“Precisely why I need every bit of what is owed to me.”

Shaking your head, you lowered your voice. “Do you see the man lingering behind me? The one with one eye.”

She glanced over your shoulder for just a moment, long enough for it to look like an accident and not a stare. “Yes?”

“He’s a rich lord from Essos,” You began the lie with a truth. “and he has fallen in love with me.”

“You have always told marvelous tales, but even for you-.”

“-Marija…I have a good feeling about him.” You spoke with more insistence. “You know that doesn’t happen very often.”

The older woman looked at you for a little longer, as if to try and pick apart your deceit. Then, when she could find no trace of it, she sighed heavily. Still, she brought out two small vanilla cakes and laid them on the counter, then brought out the bowl of puffy cream.

“You better invite me to this extravagant wedding of yours.” She frosted the cakes with the cream, creating a fluffy topping that looked as if it was true snow itself. Marija then drizzled melted chocolate over both cakes before handing them to you. “Considering this handsome stranger is wealthy.”

“He is strange.” You chuckled. “A bit arrogant too, but I shall live.”

“All men are arrogant.”

“You have not met this one. Thank you, Marija.”

“Sure, sure,” she scoffed. “Give me your water as well; I’m parched.”

“Only if you give me the jug back. I need it.”

“I’ll come around tomorrow and visit Yelena in the meantime, is that alright?”

Your smile fell for just a moment, before forcing it back. “Sounds great!”

Rushing away, you could barely hear her goodbye before you soon found Aemond again, handing him the dish. His nose wrinkled as you immediately sunk your fork into the pastry. “What is this?”

“Northern Snow.” Your answer was somewhat muffled by the amount of food in your mouth. “Marija’s traveled across the realms and has been popular for her desserts. The snow is just whipped cream with sugar and some rosewater.”

“The brown parts?” He poked the treat.

“Chocolate, but it’s meant to look like horse droppings.”

“I believe I’ll pass.”

You shook your head. “I’m meant to be showing you around the joys of the city that is not just brothels. Trust me.”

He matched your seriousness. “And if I find it revolting?”

“Then you may know where I tailor.”

Humming, he smiled as he dug his fork into the cake and then into his mouth. He pursed his lips together as you watched him ponder the taste. Then, he shook his head, taking another bite.

“You must be a witch to have known I would favor it.”

Smiling victoriously, the two of you walked a short while through the congested market until you managed to find two chairs and a table.

“What did you tell her?” He asked as you sat. “The woman who made this?”

“That you were Prince Aemond and would have my head if I did not serve you a Smallfolk delicacy.”

“No, you didn’t.”

“No, I didn’t.” You agreed, taking a bite of your treat. You hesitated on your next words. “I…she’s a romantic, and I didn’t have enough for the cakes, so I told her you were a rich lord courting me.”

It was nice you didn’t immediately expect him to lash out or condemn you to your death; he seemed genuinely composed every time you were with him, and he stuck to that.

“And what was my name?” He humored.

“I didn’t tell her one.” You teased. “If you were not yourself, what would you have wanted to be called?”

He hummed, taking time for an answer before settling on. “Ciarán.”

“I’ve met one or two of those.” You nodded. “It’s a good name.”

“Might I ask you a question now?”

“Of course.”

“Do you summon your knife out of thin air, or do you hide it in your cunt?”

Choking on your food, you placed your hand over your mouth to stifle the sound. Once you were alright, you finally looked at him. “I beg your pardon?”

“The rumors I’ve heard of you isn’t just about your beauty.” He grinned, knowing the effect on you. “It’s known that you assault men with a blade, but I’ve heard conflicting accounts.”

You stared at him for a little longer before shaking your head, snorting. “Inside of my thigh, like a normal person. You nearly grazed it the first night.”

“Did I?” He tilted his head to the side.

Nodding, you smirked as you took another bite. It was then that his eye darkened just a hint. “What?”

Aemond didn’t verbally respond. Instead, he bunched up the sleeve of his shirt, reached over to take your face into his free hand, and wiped the corner of your lip with his sleeve. “You had something white on your face.”

It was your turn to hum at his statement, continuing to eat; yet, you would glance at him more often while you slid the fork into your mouth, tongue trying to lick the utensil clean of the whipped cream. You both finished up in silence between each other, yet the people around you only chatted excitedly, laughed boldly, or moaned and fucked one another in the dingiest of places nearby.

“Is it fun to be a prince?” You asked, pushing in your chair when you bother stood to leave.

“I wouldn’t call it such.” Aemond shrugged, following suite, and the two of you were wandering aimlessly once again.

“Then what is it you do for fun?”

“I find myself in the library often; reading, studying the history.” He listed. “I train with Ser Criston Cole, Lord Commander of the Kingsguard and the Hand of the king.”

“You sound like you enjoy his company.”

“I enjoy making him falter as we spar.” He looked at you. “You mustn’t be so horrible in combat. On account of you supposedly taking men’s lives for bounties.”

Shaking your head, you place your hands in the pockets of the cloak. “I don’t take pride in it. I’ve also had my fair share of bruises and broken bones.”

“How many have you killed?”

“How many have you?”

Your response would’ve only worked if it had not been for the well-known fact he had killed Lucerys; something you had forgotten when you saw him again. Now, there you both were, your pace slowing equally in the silence that was the discomfort you had created.

Still, he responded. “Only one; and I assume you along with the rest of Westeros knows who by now.”

Nodding, you kept your eyes down on the road in front of you.

“Aren’t you going to ask how I did it?” He questioned.

You shook your head. “It’s not my place. If you wish to tell me, then tell me. If not, then I believe it’s your turn to ask something about me.”

Humming, he prodded. “Again, how many men have you killed?”

“The same as you.” You stood closer to him as a crew of rowdy men began to pass by. “He was an angry man; a ratcatcher fired from his profession, and to my luck, with no family or anyone to miss him.”

“It must have been his luck as well, considering what happened to all of them merely a week ago.”

You didn’t want to acknowledge the gate into that conversation. “I had only done the luring and thievery for a single moon; the worst I had come across was a bloodied nose and a bruised rib. This night…Chansey had warned me not to pursue him, but I was young and ignorant. I didn’t even get to the well before he came up behind me and…”

This was far too intimate of a story to tell someone you had only met twice; nonetheless, one of the princes of Westeros. You decided to end it as soon as possible. “He didn’t hurt me in the way you’re thinking. We struggled against one another, I had no knife with me at the time, but he did. He dropped it as we fought, we both reached for the blade, and I got it first.”

The two of you had somehow wandered into a small, quiet square; perhaps only a few other people resting from a drunken bender. Aemond, with his hands behind his back, simply inquired.

“Did he have anything of value on him?”

Shaking your head, you grinned. “Three pennies, a half-penny, and a surprisingly clean red scarf.”

“And the scarf was the most priceless.”

“Of course. I would’ve died in the winter without it.”

You both chuckled, and it was him who halted the walking. You stopped in front of him a few places.

 “I hadn’t meant to kill Luke.” Aemond admitted softly.

“Lucerys?” You clarified.

“Yes; only frighten him.” He sighed. “It…it was an unfortunate outcome to what I had intended.”

If he were not himself (perhaps the rich Lord Ciarán he wished to be for that one night), then you would have told him it did not matter what he intended. A boy was dead and that put all of Westeros at risk. Still, whilst your anger was present, you understood you would never know what happened that day. You also understood his regret above all; you had no right to act like a saint.

“Is there anything I can do?”

You genuinely had no idea how to respond to him. So, you did what your mother had done for you whenever you were upset as a child: Ask what you needed from her.

His eye met yours, and you somehow found the courage to not look away from him. After what felt like a lifetime, he approached you suddenly and gradually wrapped his arms around you. Your body was akin to a corpse with how frozen you had become. Still, it didn’t last for long as you found yourself easing into his hold, your own arms around his neck. The night was so quiet, you could hear his shallow breaths in your ear.

Then, his hand slipped into your pocket.

At the sudden change of touch, you flinched out of his touch, but he merely shushed you, pulling away fully. You reached into the pocket and pulled out what he had promised you; three silver moons.

Swallowing thickly, you looked up at him and saw…an array of emotions you could not describe. So, you spoke first.

“I…I hope tonight was enough for you. I’m not sure what else I-.”

“-It was nice.” He interrupted, his gaze still on you. “Lovely, even.”

Nodding, you pocketed the moons and kept your hands at your side. “I bid you a goodnight, Little Prince.”

He rose his brow. “I don’t believe I gave you permission to call me that.”

“Will you have my head then, your grace?” You taunted.

“I should.” He walked closer to you. “But I won’t. What direction is your house?”

Your heart leapt; yet, not in the way it should have after an attractive man (you would later admit) made a forward remark.

“Oh no, I will not bother you.”

“It is not a bother if I desire to see you home safely.” He argued.

“Aemond,” you stepped back, not wanting to play a game. “I don’t want you to walk with me for the rest of the night.”

The quietness returned; but, not one of comfort. He didn’t look angry, and that was what frightened you. He merely stood tall like a man.”

“I see.”

“I didn’t mean to say it so-.”

“-Yet you said it.”

Shaking your head, you tried again. “I offended you, and I’m sorry. My house is no place for anyone other than myself and-, not even other smallfolk.”

“I wouldn’t go inside if that is what worries you. I am merely curious.”

“Look,” you approached him again, only for him to step away. “if you wish to see me again, I wouldn’t mind at all-.”

“-As long as I have coin.”

Your face went blank for a few seconds you had been so shocked by his words, and soon formed a scowl. “You had offered.”

“You didn’t reject it.”

All you could do was laugh. “You-!”

He wasn’t the one to cut you off, it had been yourself. Taking a deep breath, you folded your hands over your mouth to ponder your next words. You were tired, frustrated, and wanted to go home. So, you did exactly that.

“Be safe on your journey back to the Red Keep.” Was all you said, and you brushed past him, expecting him to call you a nasty name, or chase after you again.

But, like the first night you had met him: He did nothing.

A week later, you were back where you’d always been at night: Sylvi’s brothel. As you prettied yourself, the girls were restless; not with enthusiasm for the clients, but for the talk of war. Whether it was the fear of death it would bring, or the lust for strong men to take comfort inside of a woman.

You were a part of the former. Not as horrible as some girls (you found one vomiting up her dinner after the discussion), but you had to admit you were judgmental of those excited about it. You yourself had never experienced war…but if it was just a smidge like the violence you and other women had ever suffered multiplied by a thousand…it wasn’t something you were looking forward to.

Later, you waited in Sylvi’s private quarters (the one place no one is allowed to go during work hours unless she permitted it) until it was Chansey who came, saying she had quarry for you.

She had been with an older, retired member of the Lannister guards. He was three and fifty, she told you; fucked like an animal, but when it was over, while he desired to do it again, his body ached so horribly he could only walk.

It was meant to be easy…but for any reason at all, it wasn’t that night.

You stumbled as you brought your knife out, and he unsheathed a dagger from his side. You fought and fought, it almost being like a twisted dance; he’d strike, you’d doge, and vice versa. He swiped against your side, and it stung but you had no time to even seethe in pain as he brought his blade up to stab you again.

He’d gotten tired sooner than you imagined, and you grabbed onto his sleeve, then dragging him into a handful of barrels nearby. He landed in a crash, and he wasn’t getting up. He was still breathing as you looted him. A few Coppers and a silver Stag.

It was only then, as you pushed your way through the boisterous crowds, that you felt your head begin to lighten, and your side grow heavy. Looking down at the gnawing pain, you saw crimson soak your thin gown. Oh…you were wounded.

“Chansey?” You called out over the groaning of whores and their patrons once you made it back to the brothel. The lights seemed dimmer than usual, and with one hand keeping pressure on your wound, you used your other to tap the shoulder of the nearest server.

She gasped upon seeing you. “What happened?”

“Where’s Chansey?” You asked.

“She-she’s with someone.”

“Seven Hells, already?!” Sighing, you took one of the chalices off her tray. “Fuck it, I’ll do it myself.”

And you took it in one gulp. The server gaped at you as you took another one, also downing it like it was water. “Thank you.”

Her voices of worry were once again drowned out by the sound of constant pleasure from every corner of the brothel. Now, what the server did not tell you, was that it wasn’t the cheap wine usually served to the common payer; no…it was incredibly rich, and incredibly strong.

It also didn’t help you barely ate or drank water that day. So, to no one’s surprise but yours, you were stumbling through the entire pleasure house.

“Needle and thread?” You slurred, pulling open one of the curtains abruptly only to see five naked women lying next to two men. “Sorry.”

You felt the blood begin to seep through the small cracks of your fingers and your pressure wavering as you made your way to the next curtained area.

“Do you have a needle and thread?” You asked again, being welcomed by Valda laying on her back with a man’s head between her legs.

She screamed at your intrusion and cried your name. “What the fuck?!”

“Hey,” in your haze, you found it amusing. “do you know where Chansey is?”

“Get out!”

“Okay, okay.” you whistled at the man. “Good ser, I do declare that you are a gift from The Seven because only They know how many men actually come here to-.”

“-Wait, are you bleeding?!” She sat up in alarm.

You left immediately, taking deep breaths to try and remain upright as you continued your search. A hand grazed your shoulder.

“Are you alright, girl?”

A putrid looking man questioned with a toothy grin as you turned briefly to see who touched you. You nodded. “I’m fine, go away.”

“Hey now,” he tried to make a grab for you again, but you shoved him off. “don’t be like that.”

“I’m dying, I think I can be.”

“Let me give you a little death.” He flirted.

You grabbed the nearest curtain, tossing it aside. “For fuck’s sake, does anyone have a-?!”

Words failed as you gazed upon Madame Sylvi sucking the cock of a standing man. It was then that your eyes traveled up his body, and saw a familiar, silver-haired prince.

A prince with one eye shut, and a sapphire where an eye-patch should have been.

Your mouth ran dry at the sight of him falling apart in whimpers, and it dropped once his eye opened and immediately went to yours.

Aemond released a loud groan, tossing his head back as cum dripped through the creases of Sylvi’s mouth. She drew herself away from him, still on her knees, wiping her mouth and looking over at your interruption.

“What in the devil’s name are you doing here?!”

Your words fell into syllables as you genuinely had no idea what to say. Then, in the corner of your eye, you saw the man that had been following retreat.

“Hey!” You yelled, hobbling after him. “You sheep fucker, get back here!”

Two hands grabbed your shoulders and turned you around sharply, causing a reminder of the wound in your side. You hissed, clutching it and trying to smother a cry. You kept your head low as the person who had manhandled you led you back into Sylvi’s small room. You were laying on the pillows and thin mattress. It was then you saw Aemond Targaryen hovering above you.

“No-!” You tried to push him away.

“-Calm down.” He insisted, restraining you. “You’re going to make it worse.”

“If you touch me, I’ll carve out your other eye and feed it to your mother.” You slurred.

Instead of killing you right there, he thinned his lips. “While I don’t doubt that, you shouldn’t need to worry; I’m well spent.”

You gagged, shutting your eyes in disgust and tossing your head further into the pillow you rested on. You felt a presence soon beside you, and you opened your eyes to see Sylvi.

“My prince,” she turned to Aemond. “please wait in my personal quarters and I’ll-.”

“-I’ll hold her down.” He interrupted. “She’s a fighter, if you don’t know.”

“Believe me,” she unscrewed a bottle of alcohol. “I do.”

Sylvi hiked up your dress, completely exposing you from the waist down, and poured liquid over your side, causing a squeal to escape your throat. In an attempt to not just remain calm for yourself and everyone else in the building, you did your best to stifle your cries. It only became harder to do once Sylvi stuck a needle in your skin.

That was when you instinctively rose yourself up, only for Aemond to force you back down, putting his entire weight upon you. Your hands traveled up to his bare shoulders, sinking your nails into his skin and even scratching in an animalistic attempt to get him off of you.

Tears welled in your eyes as you took in quivering breaths and suppressed your grunts in pain. It looked like everything was underwater, and you could barely make out the face of the man above you. You only saw the shimmering jewel where his left eye should’ve been.

Then, the pain was over.

Your heartbeat began to slow down, and it was no longer the only sound in your ears. Your body rose momentarily as you felt bandages being wrapped around your waist, and your dress finally lowered, covering your nakedness. You felt a warm hand brush your face gently before it pulled away abruptly.

“What did you do now?” Sylvi sighed, tossing her materials away.

You groaned, unable to move. “Bad job.”

“And so, you decided to come and bother me?”

“Chansey was fucking someone and I-.”

“-Watch your words!” She lightly slapped your face and whispered fiercely. “Prince Aemond is here, and I will not have you speak like that.”

You laughed, glancing over at Aemond, who had put his pants on, and was working on his shirt. “Do you hear that, Aemond? I can’t say ‘fuck’!”

“Are you drunk?” She hissed.

“Nooooo.” You trailed off before giggling.

Sylvi stood, placing her head in her hands and shaking her head. Now noticing how strange the whole situation was, you pushed yourself up. Your body was scalding, but you would rather die walking away from embarrassment than in the heat of it.

“He had some coin.” you sat up. “I don’t know where it went, but I’ll find it. I have to go home now.”

“You are not walking out like this.” She pushed you back down.

“I’m not sleeping here.”

“I’ll take her back.”

The prince stood tall, slipping his patch over the sapphire. Sylvi shook her head. “No.”

“Are you questioning my authority, Madame?” He challenged.

You watched her flinch. Then, taking a breath she explained. “You needn’t bother with her; she’s a humble, little thing that doesn’t listen to anyone other than herself. Besides, you requested and paid for two hours, yet you have only used twenty min-.”

“-I will gladly spend the rest of it escorting her home.”

Again, the only sounds being heard was skin slapping alongside loud moans outside. You looked in between the prince and the Madame as if you were a child being fought over. So, coughing, you sat up again.

“Can I wear my own clothes, please?”

Sylvi, for the first time that night, coddled you. “Of course. Aemond, could you tell the first girl you see to fetch her clothes from my quarters, please?”

He nodded, leaving you two alone. When he was out of sight, she brushed the hair sticking against your sweaty face.

“Tell him you changed your mind, and you’re too weak to walk.” She begged.

“And if he says he’ll carry me?”

She scoffed. “He won’t.”

“You don’t know that.”

Sylvi kissed your cheek as if to soothe you. “I don’t want you to be alone with him.”

“He told me he already had his fill of cunt.”

“Men can still hurt little girls without their cock.”

“Take a look at me,” you sassed. “don’t you think I already know that?”

She said your name softly. “He’s not as kind as he seems.”

“No, he’s not. He acts like he’s been born out of an ass’ ass. I mean…how you feel about the Dowager Queen-.”

Slamming a hand over your mouth, she spoke in your ear. “-Not another word from you. You listen to me; I’ve come to know him for the years I’ve spent with him longer than the weeks you have had with him.”

“If he’s so horrible,” you took her hand away. “then tell me what he has done.”

“He-.”

“-Never mind, I don’t care.”

Instead of stepping into the room, Aemond had tossed your set of clothes through the curtains, landing on the floor. Without words, but with looks that could kill, Sylvi helped dress you and then led you out of the brothel.

It was downpouring, and while your clothes thankfully covered almost every inch of your skin, save for your face, you weren’t in the mood to be bathed in rainwater. Sylvi hadn’t even wished you a proper goodbye; just nodded to a hooded Aemond beside you and went back inside.

“I assume you can walk?” He asked, almost annoyed at his own idea to walk you home.

“You’re not going to carry me?” You teased.

“No.”

Sighing dramatically, you took a few steps out into the rain, and immediately felt agonizing pain. Well, not as bad as earlier, but it hurt. Still, you decided to follow the best given advice: Walk it off.

“Stop, stop.” Aemond shook his head after you limped four more steps, coming to your side. “Lean against me.”

You didn’t argue, draping your arm over his shoulders. You both walked as quick as you could in the rain, you giving him directions the best you could (he had to turn around twice to go back to the same fork in the road) until you tapped his shoulder.

“Wait-wait, I don’t feel good.”

“Seven Hells.” He cursed, pulling you over to the side of the street. Grabbing your hands he placed them on the nearest wall, standing behind you to guide you.

“Hey, hey!” You rose your voice. “Don’t-don’t you even think of hiking my skirt up!”

“You’re going to smell like death in a moment, why would I ever-?”

“-Because men are…are…”

You gagged, and Aemond’s hands immediately vanished as you threw up what little you had eaten that day. Your throat was on fire the whole time, making the chill of the rain even more apparent.

“Oi!” An older man yelled. “Are you alright, ma’am?”

You nodded, wiping your mouth and turning over to look at him standing in a doorway of his shop. “Yes, thank you!”

“Do you know that man with you?”

Before Aemond could say anything, you pat his shoulder affectionately. “I’ll have you know, this is Lord Ciarán of House…Strong…Man, Strongman. He’s one of the richest men in Westeros.”

“Is that so?” He nodded, then looked at your companion. “Lad, do yourself a favor and put your old lady to bed.”

Aemond forced a smile, taking your arm and returning it back to its proper place over his shoulder. The two of you were on the road again, you leading him blindly throughout the streets. The rain felt nice at this point; not exactly, but your throat had been parched, so most of the time, you were holding your mouth up and tongue out like a child to catch the rainwater.

At one point, he hissed in pain, his hand coming up to his eyepatch.

“What is it, what’s wrong?!” You gasped.

“Nothing.” He cursed. “’Just keep going.”

Reluctantly, you carried on through King’s Landing until you reached your home.

“Okay, we’re here.” You stopped him a few minutes later.

Aemond looked at the building before him; it was a bouchère. “Here?”

“No, down there.”

He followed your gaze, and sure enough, there was a set of stairs to the side leading down. Carefully, you both scaled down the steps, and entered your home.

There was no leaking anywhere, to your surprise. With only the little amount of light within the sitting room, you knew Aemond (even with one eye) could see just how much dust there was on the furniture.

“Hells,” he sighed heavily, slipping off his cloak before you could stop him. “how do you live in this humidity? I can barely breathe.”

“I-.”

“-Vivi.” A sweet, tired voice called for you.

In the corner of the room, in her usual chair, was your grandmother. Her eyes drew up to the door once you entered, and they were alight.

“I thought you were out for too long.” She stood.

“Evening, Gigi.” You staggered over, embracing her. “And how was holding down the fort?”

“Some mice almost came in, but I showed them who was the boss around here.”

“I’m sure you did.”

It was only then did she fully realize there was someone else with you; a man. A man with silver hair. She gasped, turning back to you.

“Siobhan, you didn’t tell me the king was visiting!”

You cackled. “Gigi no, this is my friend-.”

She gently took his hand into hers, kissing it. “-Your grace, you must forgive my dear girl; she has a knack for getting into trouble, but not for telling me things.”

And then, Aemond did something you weren’t expecting. He placed his other hand over your grandmother’s, smiling.

“All is forgiven.”

Her grin was contagious as she pulled her hand away to hike her long skirt up, walking to the kitchen. “Oh, I shall make tea! Imagine what Cassian would think?” She chuckled. “Jaehaerys himself in our house!”

The name she uttered sobered you up; not all of you, but enough for terror to return into your body. Once she was out of sight, with a growing fear in your eyes, you looked at Aemond.

“You-you must understand, she hasn’t been herself since I was a child. I don’t think she’s even aware there is-was another-.”

“-I’m not a fool.” He stopped you. Noticing you had the face of someone who would vomit for the second time that night, he said. “I told you; I enjoyed reading the histories. I’m well aware the king before my father was Jaehareys.”

Feeling as if you could breathe again, you rested against the wall. “Thank you.”

Aemond hummed. “Why ‘Gigi’?”

“She never liked me calling her ‘Grandmama’.”

“And who’s Siobhan?”

Your eyes drew to the ground. No mice were in the house, but a few spiders had made their way in. “My mother.”

“Ah.” Was all he could manage.

“She uh, she died when I was one and ten; that’s when Gigi…”

“How?”

“What?”

“How did she die?”

Something clogged your throat, and your head felt heavy all over again. Swallowing the lump, you tried to find the words to-.

“-Forgive me. “Aemond spoke. “I shouldn’t have prodded.”

“No, you-.” You shook your head. “I understand your curiosity.”

And there you two were, against the wall in silence. Sighing you finally said.

“She forgets what she was meant to do when she enters a room with a purpose.” You explained. “I guarantee you, she’s doing a puzzle instead of making tea. We don’t have the best leaves anyway.”

He nodded. “Do you wish for me to leave, then?”

Your eyes went to one of the only windows in the house; the long, thin panel at the top where you could see the feet of everyone in King Landing if it were a nice day. The rain came down harsher, the spattering of water being almost too loud.

“You can stay until the storm eases,” you answered. “if you want.”

“I would prefer it.”

Nodding, the heaviness of your head did not cease, and your eyes drifted to the doorway in the back of sitting room. You made your way through it, glancing back at Aemond.

“If I may be candid, I’m quite exhausted. So…unless you’d prefer being called ‘Your Grace’ by my grandmother, then you’re more than welcome to talk with me in my room.”

“Hm, the former sounds tempting.” Despite his words, he followed close behind you.

You pushed open your door, took a few steps towards your bed, and lowered yourself to lie down with a sharp wince. The prince took his time observing your room, taking in every little detail. From the residue of a mess being pushed under your bed, to old childhood art pieces up on the wall.

One piece had caught his eye the most. A sketch of a woman’s face; a haunting gaze in her eyes that would make anyone believe she was watching them.

Much like yours…

“This is Siobhan?”

Better to use your mother’s name as if she were a stranger instead of calling her ‘your mother’.

“Gigi drew that.” You smiled lightly. “It was on one of her namedays.”

“It’s beautiful.”

His compliment unnerved you before it flattered you. You deflected with a joke. “Beautiful enough to have her paint the Targaryens the next time they so desire it?”

“If she cannot remember to boil tea-?”

“-She is herself again when she does or speak of things she loves.” You sat farther up against the wall behind your bed “Even if they’re things that no longer are with us.”

He sat at the edge of the mattress. “And what are some of those things?”

Oh, where to start? As your mind rattled over what exactly to say first, you truly looked over Aemond for the first time. It was strange; you had acknowledged his attractiveness for just a moment, but never delved more into it.

Then, as you stared at him, you knew exactly what to tell him.

Giggling, you began. “Cassian was my grandfather; I hadn’t known him, he died before I was born. Still, if it’s not him she speaks about being in love with, it’s ‘Elio’; a Dornish man, her first love.”

“Some might say they are far greater than the one you marry.” He shrugged.

“She’s never told me his real name.” You leaned forward. “She said that he had to keep it secret from her for a long time, and he only told her after she got drunk, and he thought she wouldn’t remember.”

The two of you laughed lightly, and you kept going through your giggles. “He-he was only in King’s Landing for a year and went back to Sunspear. They would send ravens to each other, but then he stopped one day. She married my grandfather, had my mother, he died, and that was life.”

“And then there was you.”

You nodded, thinning your lips. “And then there was me.”

“You’ve talked about your mother, but you haven’t mentioned your father yet.”

Sighing, you rubbed your finger into the blanket you rested upon, looking away from him. “When my grandfather’s heart gave out, Gigi had to take on more work at the tailor’s and they still weren’t making enough for food. So…my mother took up working with Sylvi. She was fifteen, and Sylvi only let her cook and clean. When she was of age, she let her go to bed with the men for her coin. I could’ve walked past my father, and I wouldn’t be able to know.”

Aemond stared at her, nodding. “You’re a bastard.”

“It’s the one time I enjoy being smallfolk.” You shrugged. “I can just as easily lie and say my father died while married to my mother.”

“No one else knows?”

“Sylvi and Marija; the woman who gave us Winter Snow.” You scoffed. “Some old neighbors who’ve thankfully died, but I still remember their insults as I passed by them when I was just a child.”

He hummed, and you did not blame him for not saying anything after you. The two of you just existed in your childhood bedroom, the rain still beating against the roof, but not quite as hard this time.

“What were you like when you were a boy?” You questioned.

“Not like my brother or nephews.” He answered right away. “They…teased me a lot.”

“I’ve never had brothers or sisters, but aren’t they meant to?”

“Not like how they did.”

Oh…so it was bad. You wouldn’t ask him how horrible it was, knowing that there are some things no one would ever want to speak of.

“I’m sorry they did.”

He shook his head. “No need, it was years ago.”

“It was still wrong.”

Aemond didn’t say anything; didn’t even look at you. Then, for some reason…you felt compelled (maybe even okay) to tell him. “My mother she…died the same way my grandfather did.”

“His heart.”

“We-we think so. It’s strange though; she was so young, and just one night we were eating dinner, she stands to go tend to the fire…and she fell. It…it was as if her soul had been sucked away from her and all that was left was her body.”

“And you think you’ll die like her.”

Swallowing thickly, you had hoped he didn’t see right through you about that; but at the same time…how freeing it felt to be seen even in the most shameful and terrifying moments of life.

“She was the main provider for our house.” You went into more detail. “Gigi tried her best, but it wasn’t enough. My mother…Sylvi hasn’t told me everything she did to earn enough coin, and I don’t think I want to know. Many healers have said that people dying from a bad heart at such a young age is due to stress. I don’t know if they’re right, and even when I was one and ten, I did everything in my power not to feel so, but Gigi would wander around King’s Landing late at night, or we couldn’t afford food for days on end…”

You were vomiting all of your troubles onto him, it was disgusting; but, once you started, you couldn’t stop. The storm had picked up again, and from how the wind shook the walls of your room, you thought they would all crumble.

“Sylvi knew of us struggling, and she paid for our meals. I was to become an indentured servant to her, like how my mother was; cooking, cleaning, running odd errands…but she paid me in coin as well. I think-I think she thought I was going to follow in my mother’s footsteps when I was of age, but I refused. That’s when some of the girls and I came up with a way for me to make extra coin, and here we are.”

“She never let anyone younger than seventeen be a whore?”

For a moment, you pondered how that was the one thing he got from your nervous ramblings. Still, you decided it wasn’t best to think about it. “She didn’t want men bedding little girls.”

“I suppose it’s different for girls.”

You frowned. “What do you mean?”

“It was my thirteenth nameday when my brother brought me to Sylvi’s pleasure house.” He said it as if it was common knowledge. “He said I needed to know everything there was about women. Your Madame certainly taught me well. It makes sense I suppose; girls are taught to be more ashamed about it.”

Even with the storm still going outside, the only sound you could hear was the beating of your own heart. “…What?”

You remembered what it was like when you were that age. Your body felt strange, you bled between your legs for the first time, you wanted a husband right away one moment, and then wanted to be a child forever the next. You were good at talking to men who were older than you…but…being intimate? No…and Sylvi had…Sylvi had-?

“Is something wrong?”

If you were delusional, you would say he seemed concerned. Still, if you were to tell him that what Sylvi had done was hypocritical and despicable of her, you would go red in the face with tears, and he would only spit on you and say you wouldn’t understand, and-.

“-Your hair.” You said, having been staring at it whilst your mind rushed. “Has…has it always been curly?”

Aemond scowled, not in scorn, but in puzzlement. It must’ve started to dry as he spent time in the house; it must’ve been frizzy and horrible as well. “Yes.”

You forced a smile. “And here I thought only the ladies of the night burned their hair since men favor it straight.”

“Mothers too.” He sighed when he saw the look you gave him. “It curled more by the time I was fourteen. She had the servants straighten it for me ever since; I believe she hates anything about me that is a reminder that she is my mother.”

“Aemond…”

“I don’t need your pity. I’ve been with her since I was born, it is nothing new and I have-.”

You don’t know why you reached forward and combed a strand of his hair between two of your fingers. Maybe it was because you were still tipsy, or maybe it’s because you just wanted to. He flinched upon your touch, and so did you.

“For-forgive me,” you backed farther up your bed. “I-I forgot myself and I-.”

He brought himself forward, taking both of your hands. Without looking at you, he brought both of them into his hair. Almost like it was second nature, you began to gently run your fingers over his scalp. He shut his eye, his hands traveling to drape along your waste, and he bent his head to rest upon your chest.

It was strange. Strange but nice. You were holding him, but just to have the illusion of you also being cared for…not even your grandmother had done something like this for years.

“I like your hair just how it is.” You whispered after a minute. “If it matters at all.”

He merely hummed, his hand travelling under your shirt. Your breath hitched when you felt his finger caress the skin above your wound. Your hands did not still, continuing to comb through his hair softly.

His finger traveled farther up, circling the swell of your breast. You made a noise you hadn’t made before, and you thought you sounded ridiculous. He hummed against your chest, and…

And…

Something between your legs felt like it was beating; like your heart, but it wasn’t that.

“I’m going to touch you there.” He mumbled against the fabric of your shirt. “Alright?”

No, no it wasn’t alright, but it was at the same time.

It wasn’t okay because you’ve only heard stories about this from the girls at the brothel, but it was okay because-because you liked him, and he was-

and you were-

and everything feels warm-

and the way he talked to you-

and the way you-!

“Get off!” You whispered once you heard just the lightest of footsteps outside your door. He listened, backing away quickly to the edge of the bed. An almost silent knock came from your door, and you smiled. “Come in!”

Gigi pushed herself in, holding a tray with two steaming mugs, setting it on the bed. “I’m so sorry, your grace. We do not have tea leaves, so is milk alright?”

Aemond nodded. “It is.”

“How have the both of you been?”

You wore a thin grin. “Fine.”

She nodded, looking in between the two of you. As if she knew what had just taken place, she gave a wry smile and turned to leave. “Well, the rain is dying down now. Let me know if you two need anything else.”

“Thank you, Gigi.” You said without another thought.

She didn’t shut the door when she left. You picked up the mug, took a sip and immediately felt your body heal just a little. Warm milk does numbers on a soul.

“I should take my leave now.” The prince stood up abruptly, dusting himself off.

You tried to stand. “I’ll walk you out.”

The wound at your side burned every inch you moved, and you did a horrible job concealing it. Aemond gently took your shoulders, pushing you back down.

“Rest.” He commanded. “You’re injured, and it’s late.”

“And when have you ever cared?” You teased

“Perhaps just now.” He matched your tone.

“Do you know what I hate?”

“Me? Life itself? Men?”

“Yes, to the last two.” You feel your chest constrict at what you would say next. “I hate that you told Sylvi you would spend time with me because you paid her for…other things previously.”

Aemond tilted his head to the side. “Is that so?”

She nodded. “You…you no longer have to pay for my company. You’ve seen me in turmoil, and I’ve seen you naked.”

He laughed…he laughed in a way you’d never heard him laugh before. “Is that what makes us allies?”

“Friends?” You reworded. “You understand the meaning, don’t you?”

“Of course I do.” He scoffed.

“So…are we friends now?”

Friends who touch each other in ways they usually don’t.

A hint of a smile spread across his lips. He took your hand and kissed your knuckles. “Friends.”

You dropped your face, hopefully to avoid him seeing how you blushed. The damage was done though. Regaining yourself, you took a deep breath and looked at him.

“And…I’m aware I won’t be the first person you’ll seek if you’re in distress, but please know I will help if you need it.”

“Do not call yourself inadequate.” He shook his head. “I might have some use for you.”

You scoffed. “How considerate of you.”

“Rest now.” He repeated, turning to leave without a proper goodbye.

You sat up. “Wait!” Aemond did not turn to look at you, but he stopped. “Your eye. When you were walking me home, you were in pain. Does it still hurt?”

He was silent. For a moment, you thought it was to come up with a lie, then you assumed it was to find the words to tell you the truth…you had too much faith in him for either.

“It’s late.” He said your name softly and walked out of your bedroom. You heard the front door open then shut.

And there you were, on your bed, alone with an undrunk mug of milk.

The rain had completely stopped.

[puck-luck]

moving along | john marino

warnings: established relationship, general complaints about Jersey, minor brat!reader but it’s not part of the sex, untraditional sex in the sense that they do not have furniture, unprotected p in v, sex as means of resolving an argument i guess?, fingering (fem!receiving) (sometimes i wonder if i need to clarify that because i personally am not into fingering my man’s ass and i doubt it’ll ever make its way into my writing), reference to oral (m!receiving), eating come (so true) pairing: John Marino x fem!reader request: “Could I request John Marino smut where after he’s traded to the Devils from Pittsburgh his girl is upset about the move but when they get to New Jersey he decides the best way to handle the move is for them to christen the new apartment to make it feel like home?  Like literally no furniture has arrived yet and they’re already going at it.” wc: 2570

Pitt had been your home since John first signed his contract with the Penguins in the summer of 2019. You’d moved there with him because he asked, you two had curated a shared apartment space that you loved and considered your first real home as an adult. You were happy in Pittsburgh and John was happy with the Penguins. You hadn’t really known about the trade until it came, just ten days shy of the three year anniversary of Pitt becoming your home base, your foundation.

You knew that the NHL was a fickle business when John first joined. Injuries were abundant, trades happened more often than you thought they would, and at weird times. Hell, people lost their teeth all the time in hockey. It was a weird sport, but for three years you and John had made a place for yourself in Pitt. 

John had just signed a six year contract extension with the Penguins a year and a half ago– so, yeah, you were still in denial about leaving Pittsburgh. It just didn’t make sense and you couldn’t wrap your brain around it.

You had packed up in what seemed like lightning speed, ditched the town that you knew, and now you’re arriving in Jersey. You don’t know anyone or any places except your new apartment complex, your new home. 

You’re cranky because you’ve been in the car for six hours. Not because you hate New Jersey and everyone there for uprooting your life in a mere instant.

Obviously.

John has been a saint about the move and the trade. It’s not his first– since he was originally drafted with the Oilers, he’s been through this process before. The difference, as you’ve reminded him multiple times now, is that he never played with the Oilers. He was picked, but he went to college. Then, he went to Pitt. And Pitt, John, was home. Not New Jersey.

That’s the gist of the same argument you’ve been having with your boyfriend over the past week or so. It’s never escalated because John is patient with you and so great, but you’ve noticed the tick in his jaw when you huff and puff and tense up in his arms. You don’t want to be angry at him, of course you don’t, because you know that it’s not his fault he was traded. It’s just the way the cookie crumbles. However, his presence has been a reminder of the fact that you were so happy in Pennsylvania and you’ve been nothing but bitter about New Jersey.

And now, standing in your empty apartment with a frown on your face, John has reached his limit.

He sneaks up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist and hooking his chin over your shoulder. He presses a kiss to the side of your neck and one of your hands finds its way to his curls. 

“Thank you for coming with me,” John murmurs into your ear, another kiss adorning your neck.

You scrunch up your nose and side eye him. “Duh,” you reply. John knows that you two have been together long enough that you’d damn near follow him to the ends of the Earth, even if the end of the Earth is in New Jersey. 

Your response causes him to chuckle, kissing you again. He turns you in his arms and smiles down at you. 

You glare, pouting, but John can tell that you’re more upset than angry. It’s been a lot of change over the past few days, and even though you’ve been a little bit of a brat, your behavior has been justified. John’s heart clenches a bit when you reach up and wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him into a hug.

It’s quite the sight– a sweet, long embrace between partners in their newest home.

At least, it’s sweet until John ruins it.

“I have an idea about how we can make this place feel a little more… homey,” John says. You know the lilt in his voice by heart, having been with him for years. 

Pulling away, you roll your eyes and making sure John sees, knowing exactly where this is headed. You play along anyway. “What’s your idea?”

John grins and whispers conspiratorially, “We need to christen the apartment. It’s not a home until it’s been christened.”

You hold back a laugh, but a smile slips through. “We don’t have a bed yet.”

“We don’t need a bed,” John says. He slides his hands down to your hips and walks forward, only stopping when your back hits the wall and he’s crowded into your space. His head dips down and he mouths over your jawline. “I can fuck you right here, against this wall.”

“Mmm, dreamy,” you quip, your hands smoothing over John’s shoulders. You tilt your head back so he has more access to your neck and he rewards you by sucking a hickey near your pulse point. “You really know how to woo a girl, Johnny.”

John’s hips press against yours and you can already feel him stirring in his pants, growing harder as he continues to suck bruises along your skin. His hands have found your waist and hold onto you desperately. His lips make their way to yours and you share a brief kiss before he pulls away. “Just want to make my girl feel better,” he says, blinking innocently at you with his beautiful brown eyes.

Oh, how you fall for those eyes over and over again.

You draw out a sigh, looking around the apartment. One of your hands returns to John’s curls and pets through them, making him wait for your response. John, patient as always, waits for your response with an attentive smile and a tiny tilt of his head. His eyes rake over your face, taking in all of the details. His thumb comes up to your chin, tilting your head up. He leans in for a kiss.

You offer your lips up willingly, letting him control the pace. When he pulls away, you relent. “I guess we can christen the apartment,” you faux-complain, like it’s a job to keep up with John and his libido. 

John growls, teeth finding your bottom lip. “Let’s see if I can convince you to be a little more enthusiastic,” he teases, sneaking his hands up your shirt and lifting it over your head. He tosses the fabric behind him. Out of sight, out of mind. 

You hadn’t worn a bra today, since all you had done was sit in the car all day, and John reaps the benefits of that fact almost immediately.

He latches onto your chest, licking over one of your nipples and pinching the other. You pull on his hair, arching your back away from the wall. Your mouth opens in a silent moan as you puff out your chest, chasing the sensation of his tongue swirling against the peak of your nipple. He switches sides, looking up at you with hooded eyes.

“Johnny,” you say, and he smiles against your skin. You bring him back up to your lips, groaning when his tongue finds its way into your mouth and makes contact with your own. 

He runs his fingers all over your body, cupping your breasts and tracing your sides. He takes a handful of your ass and squeezes, making you jump against him. His length is fully hard now, still pressing into your hips, and he breathes out a moan when you roll your hips, grinding against him. 

You tug at his t-shirt, a wrinkly old stained thing from college, and he pulls away from you just long enough to get the offending clothing over his head before reconnecting your lips.

Now, your hands are the ones roaming his body, mapping his details through feel alone. He’s always been lean, but his skin is warm against yours and he’s defined in all the right places. He’s also soft and solid and he moves with your hands, making sure you’re always touching him in some way. You place the flat of your palm against his stomach, and the other against his chest, and you can feel John’s heart beating underneath your touch.

John sinks to one knee, pulling your shorts down and kissing over your stomach as he does. He removes your shorts and your panties, leaving you bare against the wall. He holds you steady, completely unnecessarily but sweet nonetheless, helping you step out of the clothing. He kisses his way back up your body.

Pecking your lips, he runs a finger through your folds. “So wet,” he mumbles into your mouth, pride filling his tone. He brings his finger up to his mouth and sucks it clean, then traces his tongue over yours. You can just barely taste yourself and it makes your knees a little weak. 

You lean into him, pulling him close. John works his finger back into you, pumping it slowly into and out of your entrance. It’s barely enough contact, barely fulfillment, and it isn’t long until you beg John to add another finger.

You’re scrambling, holding his bicep with a vice grip as he hikes your leg up onto his hip to give himself more access. You’re fucking against his hand, chasing the feeling of the orgasm that’s just out of reach, and it makes your eyelids flutter shut.

You moan aloud when John crooks his fingers and traces the spongy spot inside of you, teasing it. When you open your eyes, you find his trained on your face, lips parted and eyes wide. He never gets tired of seeing you like this, seeing you come apart on his hand.

“Please,” you breath out, voice cracking. You know you can come anytime, whenever you’re ready, that you don’t need permission, but you need John to give you just a little more.

“Touch your clit for me, baby,” John replies, kissing just under your earlobe.

You reach around and pet over your bundle of nerves, the contact making you clench down on his fingers. John groans at the feeling, sagging against you. You’re trapped between the wall and his warm, solid, strong body. 

“Make yourself come,” John encourages, voice soft. “Wanna see you.”

A wanton whine rips from your throat as your climax overtakes you. You arch into John as much as you can and he brings his mouth to your nipple once again, sucking harshly as the waves of your orgasm overtake you. It elongates it, makes your mind reel with pleasure, and you’re shaking in John’s arms by the time you come down.

He kisses you until you’re on solid ground again, the hand that’s not covered in your come crading your face. The other hand pushes at his shorts until they’re low enough that he can kick them away, then he does the same with his boxers. John grinds against you, his cock twitching against your oversensitive folds, but not breaching your entrance just yet.

He rubs himself against you until you pull away from his kiss and blink up at him, eyes hazy. Both of your hands find his cheeks and you smile at him, a little dopey. He returns the smile, goofy and oh, so pretty before dropping a kiss on your forehead.

“Gonna let me fuck you?” He asks, rolling his hips forward again with a bite to his bottom lip.

You nod, a quiet “please” falling from your lips. Your arms loops around his neck again and John brings his hands to your thighs, lifting you until your legs wrap around his waist.

“I’m gonna fuck you in every room of this apartment,” John promises, lining himself up with your entrance. You sink down on him as much as you can, as soon as his tip pushes into you. “Make you come over and over again, until you love our new home–” He thrusts his hips forward. “Just as much as you love me.”

“Impossible,” you reply. “Love you too much.”

John grins, a hand on your hip and the other bracing himself against the wall. “We’ll see.”

He drills into you, the sound of his hips slapping against yours filling the empty apartment. It seems to echo off the walls, surrounding you. John’s grunts and moans fill your ears, and your whimpers fill his. He bites your neck, then soothes the skin with a pass of his tongue, letting his saliva cool over your throat. It’s almost as satisfying as the weight of his hand would be.

He fills you so well, and he’s pent up, having been waiting to fuck you for hours. His favorite way to satisfy you, to make you content, is to fuck all of the negativity away and make it so your head is full of thoughts about him and the pleasure he’s giving you, nothing more and nothing less. The move was the perfect excuse to fuck you hard and fast and dirty, the way John knows you love.

As evidenced by your walls clenching down around him, the wet slick dripping from your cunt and gathering at the base of his cock. God, if he can get you to come before he does, he’ll have you lick it all off until his come paints the back of your throat.

Just the thought has him fucking you harder, faster. You’re barely able to make any noise because it’s just so good, and John relishes in the feeling of your fingernails digging into his back. Back in its favorite place, one of your hands pulls on his curls, grip so tight that his head has to follow. 

John brings both hands to the globes of your ass, leaning into you so that your back against the wall supports you both. He presses into you, fucking so deep that he swears he can feel the tip of his cock against your cervix with each thrust. 

You cry out, tensing against him as he fucks you through a second orgasm, your legs shaking around him. You’re breathless and despite the overstimulation, you’re still fucking down onto him, rolling your hips to meet every thrust. 

John ditches his other plan on a whim, burying his face in your neck and allowing his hips to stutter, his warm seed shooting off inside of you. You moan aloud at the feeling and John almost buckles, and would have if the wall behind you hadn’t been holding the both of you up. He catches his breath, his thrusts slowing as he continues to fuck his come deep inside of you, feeling the way your walls drag against his shaft. 

“So good,” you sigh as John lowers you to the floor.

He slips out of your warmth with a wince, his cock softening. His mouth waters as he watches the come slide down the inside of your thighs, a milky mixture of both of your releases.

You laugh a little at the feeling, dragging your hand over the skin to stop the flow and licking the liquid off your palm to clean yourself up. 

John groans at the sight. “Fuck, baby, don’t do that,” he complains. “I can’t go again yet.”

“Mmm,” you hum around your fingers, drawing them out of your mouth with a pop that has John wilting. You smile, sickly sweet and teasing. “Just like at home. Nice to see that a change of location doesn’t affect your refractory period.”

[apothe-roses]

I Wanna Ride

Modern Aemond Targaryen x Reader

Part 3

Previous Part | Next Part

Summary: the deal is struck between you and Aemond

Warnings: none, really

A/N: Sorry this took so long! I’ve been really busy with work, and this part was kinda hard to write. That’s also why this is shorter

Word Count: 1.6k

“And he didn’t tell you what he wanted?” Aly looks over at you while adding a slice of turkey to the sandwich she’s making? You shake your head. It had been a few days since everything went down, yet you were still trying to wrap your head around it all. The fact that Aemond would consider helping you at all—foreboding debt aside—just didn’t make sense to you.

“Why does he have to be so cryptic and spooky,” Aly asks, adding a generous amount of mayo to the sandwich.

“Beats me,” you reply. A shout startles you both out of your conversation. You and Aly turn your heads to the living room area. Benji Blackwood and his two friends Kermit and Oscar Tully—“the muppets” as Aly likes to call them—are sprawled across Aly’s couch, cursing at a video game they’re thoroughly engrossed in.

“Oi! You tryin’ to wake your dad up?” Aly calls to them. Currently, Aly’s brother Sam was down the hall, trying to sleep off a migraine. The boys cringe slightly.

“Sorry,” one of the Tully boys stage whispers back to Aly. She sighs. “Anyways, lunch is ready.” In a flash, the boys were on their feet, making their way to the kitchen. Aly pushes the sandwich with the mayo mountain towards Benji.

“Would you like some sandwich with your mayo?” She teases. Benji scowls back, but his expression quickly morphs into a grin. The boys make their way back to the couch. Aly turns to you.

“Listen, if he tries to pull anything with you, just say the word and I’ll kick his ass. Then I’ll call Cregan and he’ll also kick his ass.” You laugh in response. “What’s his deal with them anyways? Are they friends?”

“Acquaintances is more like it. They get along well enough, but Creg’s friendship with Jace sorta puts him on thin ice.”

“…Yeah, I still don’t get it.”

“Look, rich people friendships are weird, okay?” Aly explains. “Sometimes it’s better if you don’t ask questions and just go with it. I find the truth usually comes out on its own time.” She starts resealing containers and putting them in the fridge. You follow suit, deciding to take her advice. You two clean in silence for a couple minutes, until your phone buzzes. You look at the name on the screen, suddenly feeling very nervous.

You show the conversation to Aly. Her eyebrows raise, and she notes the tense expression on your face. “You know you don’t have to do this right? I’m sure I could find some time to give you lessons.”

You think about it for a moment. Aly would certainly be a nicer teacher than Aemond. But her Raven is much different than your Meraxes. Plus, you’d be lying if you said you weren’t looking for an excuse to learn more about the enigmatic, handsome Targaryen.

“I don’t want to cut into your time with your family. I know how important it is to you,” you tell her. “Besides, we’re all adults. I can handle a little tough love.”

“Alright then. Lemme know if you change your mind,” Aly relents, leaving the kitchen. You turn back to your phone to text Aemond.

Saturday morning comes far too soon, and you find yourself heading back to Aemond and Aegon’s shop in the passenger seat of Aly’s truck. One of the doors is rolle up, and you can see Aemond working on a bike. He lifts his head when he hears the engine.

“Well,” you breathe, “here goes nothing.”

“Remember, I’m only a text away,” Aly reassures you. You grin then exit out the passenger side door. Before you turn away, you see Aly glare at Aemond, pointing at her eyes then at him before making a u-turn and driving off. You take a deep breath, then walk over to Aemond. By now, he’s standing and wiping his hands with a cloth. He’s wearing the same outfit as when you two first met, only this time the coveralls are unzipped with the sleeves tied around his waist. The white singlet he’s wearing does nothing to hide the definition of his chest or arms. A few streaks of grime decorate his body, along with a few tattoos. He’s not overtly bulky, but he’s definitely in shape. His biceps flex slightly as he cleans his hands; you try not to bite your lip.

You both stand in awkward silence, waiting for someone to break it. You decide to bite the bullet yourself.

“Where’s Aegon,” you ask, peering into the garage, but there’s no sign of Aemond’s brother.

“He doesn’t typically come in on weekends,” Aemond answers. “Prefers to sleep in.”

“Oh.” You’d hoped he’d be here; his easygoing nature could’ve served as a good mediator.

“So I take it you’re interested?” It takes a moment for you to realize he meant the training.

“Oh I’m yeah. But I want to know what exactly you’re hoping to get out of this,” you reply quickly. Get your shit together you mentally chastise yourself. He’s not worth it.

“Hmm, yes. I’ve been going back and forth on what I want from you,” he starts, setting the rag on a nearby workbench. He turns his back on you.

“And you’ve decided on…” you prompt. He drums his fingers on the table, silent. Then…

“The Conqueror’s Gala. I need someone to go with me,” he states. That’s it? He needs a date to some fancy event? You thought you’d have to do something like clean his house or shine his bike for a month. Not this.

“If you want me to pretend to be your girlfriend, Targaryen-“

“No. Gods no. Nothing like that.” Aemond hastily replies. “My mother is always on my as about bringing a date. Normally, I’d just go with Helaena, but this year she’s decided to side with mum. They want me to prove that I’m capable of spending time with people I’m not directly related to.” His mouth presses into a thin line, and he averts his gaze. He starts drumming his fingers again. It looks like that’s something he does when he’s agitated. You let the silence simmer, silently enjoying the way his jaw clenched.

“Hmmm. I suppose I could spare one evening to get all dressed up and rub elbows with the Westerosi elite,” you sigh in pretend annoyance. He gives you a disgruntled look. “Trust me. It’s not the fun time you think,” he says sharply. Of course a cryptic like him wouldn’t enjoy social events. You try not to laugh at the thought.

“Well, fun or not, I’ll take it,” you tell him. His shoulders relax a little.

“Good,” he says stiffly. “Shall we?” he gestures his hand towards the bike. You realize it’s his own, the bronze coloring of the Vaghar catching the late morning light. You make your way over and take your seat. The bike has the same controls as your Meraxes, but his has extra side mirrors affixed.

Aemond leans over you, one hand on the handlebar and the other on the seat behind you. It takes all your willpower not to gawk at his arm.

“Alright,” Aemond says softly. “Now I want you to start the engine.”

You turn and look at him, incredulous. “You think I don’t know how to start a bike?”

Aemond levels a flare at you. “I’m just being thorough.” You scoff and roll your eyes, but you do as he says.

“Good,” he muses. He’s inches from your ear. The soft timbre of his voice sends a shudder through you. “Now what?” You choke out. You hate the effect he has on you.

“I want you to shift to first gear,” he instructs. All you can do is obey blindly.

“Good. Good,” he praises. He has you go through all the gears and how to break, giving a little praise each time you do something correct. It’s all painfully easy, and you should be insulted he’s making you prove such basic knowledge. Instead, you silently relish the rush of warmth you get with each praise. Hell, you’re almost tempted to get something wrong on purpose just to see how he’ll react? Would he gently explain the correction, or would he go back to being rude and insult you?

“Well then,” Aemond says, pushing off his bike. You mourn the loss of his warmth on your shoulder. “It seems you really do know the basics.” He drawls the last part. Oh yeah, that’s what it’s like when he insults you. You get off the bike, and he starts to wheel it into the garage. “But the Dragon Rally isn’t for the feint of heart. You’ll need to be able to ride long distances in potentially rough weather. You need to be adaptable, ready to make a decision at a moment’s notice. And that’s not even including the Rally itself.”

“What happens at the Rally?” you ask.

“Wouldn’t you like to know,” Aemond replies, turning his back on you. You scoff. “Yes. I would. That’s why I asked”

He smirks. “All you need to know is that you need to build up your endurance. I’d like to take you on a ride through the Kingswood when you’re next available. Once you’re comfortable, we’ll take more challenging treks. Sound good?”

You nod your head. At least you won’t have to have weird conversations with him when riding.

“Good. Check your schedule, and give me your next available date,” he says before pulling the garage door closed in your face.

You stand there in stunned silence. What the fuck is up with this guy?

You text Aly, and a few minutes later her truck pulls up to the sidewalk.

“Well that was quick,” she observes as you put on your seatbelt.

“You’re telling me,” you reply, looking back at the garage as Aly pulls away.

You were confused. You were intrigued. Something told you this was only the tip of the iceberg that was Aemond Targaryen.

Previous Part | Next Part

Taglist: @valeskafics @carriellie @let-love-bleeds-red @wintrr13 @queenofshinigamis @seabasscevans @fangirlninja67 @toodlesxcuddles @almostpurplelady @goldenpanda16 @aemonds-fire @yentroucnagol @tssf-imagines @n4tforlife @mooncalvin @julczimozart @kezibear

Bold means I couldn’t tag you

[yelenabelovasbxtch]

Crush On An Archer PT.1

a/n: Hey! Omg long time no see! I kinda maybe lost interest in writing for a bit there but tbh I think I'm back. No promises because I don't want to promise and then break your hearts but also I realllyyyy enjoyed writing this and I hope you all enjoy reading it! Will def be making a part two in coming days so stay tuned. LMK if you want to be added to the taglist, I am going to put some tags of past taglists below just in case they are interested in reading :) ALSO! Special shout out to @scmg11 because their writing is honestly what made me wanna get back into it. So,,I hope you enjoy!

Kate X Fem!Reader

Concept: Reader has a crush on Kate (school/Uni setting) and she doesn't know how to tell her.

Warning: Cussing, mentions of smut, IM TRYING TO WRITE SLOW BURN BUT BEAR WITH ME ITS NEW!

Word Count: 2.7k

You’re a month into your summer vacation and things couldn’t be more…boring. You love and appreciate your parents dearly for putting out the money so that you could attend a prestigious school in New York with a kick ass archery team but does it ever suck to be this far from all your friends for four months. To make the situation work, your dad had to transfer jobs to another state that pulls in a little more money annually with slightly more affordable housing but that means you aren’t even near the people you grew up around. Rural Mississippi is a fairly big step from living in Boston. Boston at least had people, out here it’s like you’re lucky if you get to meet a neighbour because the land has us all so far apart. In all honesty, although it’s boring, you really have one specific reason for being so bummed out. Towards the end of your last semester, you got started getting closer with one of the girls a year younger on your team, Kate. Typically the older girls competed and practised together and the younger girls did the same. Although you two were only a year apart it’s just how things worked out, so you didn’t cross paths very often. However, one day you were walking home from class, stopped to get coffee and basically bumped into her. The meeting was really brief but it was enough to make you catch feelings almost instantly. 

Your interest in her grew as you followed her on Instagram and she followed back. Obviously you took a peak at her page and scrolled to the bottom laughing at the really cringey posts from 2015 she had still up. All you wanted to do was talk to her again but you didn’t know how, although she was a year younger than you she intimidated you so much. Her deep blue eyes were honestly enough to make you stutter whenever you had the chance to talk to her. A month had gone by already and you could not wait to get back to school so you could see her again. Luckily, coach has yearly “team-building” days before the season starts and they’re about half way through the summer so hopefully you can talk to her before then and maybe convince her to hang out when you come back to school. 

Over the next week or so you liked a few story posts that she’d upload every now and again but the day finally came where you felt like you could swipe up and respond to it…y’know…maybe spark a little conversation. 

“Damn Bishop, is this a new bow?” In response to a story post of her showing off some of her off season training. 

“Haha yeah it is, flips out and everything…it's really freakin’ cool.” She replied almost instantly and that made a giant warm smile come across your face. 

Shit– what do you say back? Your main goal was honestly to keep the convo going so you could subtly mention down the line hanging out with her. 

“Yeah that’s sick, wow I’d kill to try something like that out.”

“Well next time I see you, please by all means give it a shot” She replies back.

“Might just have to take you up on that. How’s your summer going anyways?”

“It’s alright, kind of boring though. All my friends from school move back home and I am working for my mom’s company over the summer so it all is just kind of dull. I miss going out and having fun. Wbu?”

“Yeah, I hear that. I am SO bored here. I would kill to fast forward to the fall, I miss being at school honestly. There’s only so much I can do by myself here during the summer.”

“Ugh right! I want it to be school again too but don’t get me wrong, I love the summer, the weather is great here recently and the nightlife is amazing too. I just have nobody to go with, you know.”

“Yeah I get it. Trust me, if I could be there to go out with you I would, there is definitely no nightlife here haha.”

Shit. That wasn’t too forward was it? She is taking a while to respond to you. She hasn’t even opened the message yet. 

*4 minutes later*

“Well, you’re going to be around for that team-building thing coach has us doing in a couple of weeks right?”

“Yeah, I should be.”

“Well, we can go out then if you want? Me and a few friends had plans but they’re all on the team and I’m sure they’d love to have you there too.”

“Yeah, that sounds great I’d love to!”

The conversation pretty much ended there and your contact with her was fairly limited, just a small comment here or there until you finally got to fly back to school for summer training. You settle back into the apartment you left a couple months ago, everything is still a mess where you left it but the kitchen and living room are even filthier since you are not around to clean up much after your roommates. You decided to wait until your team practice to talk to Kate about hanging out again. You didn’t want to come on too strong but also a small part of you feels like she forgot what she said months ago and you won’t end up seeing her, not outside of team stuff at least. 

You grabbed your gear and headed to the field where practice was being held. You saw some of your friends from last year and decided to catch up with them before coach pulled you all in to start practice. You were trying your best not to make it obvious but your eyes were tracking all around you looking for Kate but she was nowhere to be seen. 

*Whistle* “Okay team! Let’s bring it in. First, I just want to say thank you to everyone for making the effort to come back to campus for this, meeting I–”

“SORRY SORRY SORRY!” You hear the coach interrupted as footsteps are fast approaching the circle of archers. 

“Hi Kate.” Says coach.

“I am SO sorry. My driver was running late and then there was traffic because of a giant accident, I think there was some battle in the streets again, I don’t know, either way, my bad coach, won’t happen again…I promise.” She says with the most adorable grin that is absolutely saying she will be late again. 

“It’s alright Kate, it happens, I was just telling the team how thankful I am that everyone could make the trip back to campus for this.” Coach went on to talk about the drills you were doing for the day and man was it hard to not be in awe watching her. You tried your best not to stare all day because the last thing you wanted to do was make it obvious but fuck it felt impossible. The day came to an end and you packed up your gear, Kate was talking with the other seniors on the team as they were gathering their things and started to head out. You could feel your window closing to talk to her but interrupting her conversation with her friends and “inviting” yourself out with them just felt too weird and uncomfortable. If it wasn’t meant to be then it wasn’t meant to be but you would kill to be able to just spend an hour with her. 

You watched as she started to walk away towards the parking lot with her friends when all of a sudden she motioned for them to hold on a minute and she turned around and jogged over to you. 

“Hey y/n! Sorry we didn’t get to catch up much during practice, I saw your shooting though it’s looking good.” 

Yeah…your face is bright red. Control your shit. 

“Anyways, me and a couple friends are going out later tonight to a party that one of their friends is hosting. It’s like a Hawaiian beach summer nights themed type of party so if you have something like that to wear, that would be great.”

“Yeah, I might have something, I’ll take a look when I get home.” 

“Cool! I’ll text you the address once I get it off my friend and I’ll see you there?”

“Yeah, sounds good!” 

“Here, why don’t you put your number into my phone, I don’t like using DM’s that much.”

You take Kate’s phone out of her hand and fill out a contact for yourself, praying that she can’t hear your heart beating out of your chest. 

“Cool, thanks, I’ll send you a text in a bit.” She says with a smile and then runs off to re-join her friends. 

It seems silly sitting by your phone and literally watching the minutes tick by waiting for her to text you but that’s all  you could do. The anticipation felt like it was killing you. 

Your phone finally buzzed with a mystery number attached, “Hey y/n! It’s Kate. So…slight change of plans.”

Fuck. Is she bailing? Your eyes were glued on the three dots as she typed and you watched as they disappeared and reappeared. 

“Turns out the party is actually around the corner from my place so if you wanted to just come here first, we could pre-game and shit and then walk over together? My friends said they were going out to get their hair done so they’ll be running late.”

“Hey Kate, yeah no problem that works for me just send me your address and lmk what time you want me there.”

Kate dropped a pin of her location to you with the text attached telling you to come over at 7pm. 

7pm rolled around and you were already there outside but you kind of felt like you should wait another minute or two so you weren’t RIGHT on time. Or is it weird to be a minute late? But wouldn’t being on time be weirder? Whatever, you decided to just wait a minute and then knock on her door. 

Knocking on her door was the most nerve wracking thing you ever did, you were genuinely shitting bricks. 

“HEY! Come in come in!” Kate eagerly yells at you as she swings the door open. She’s wearing shorts with a bright purple bikini top and a button down Hawaiian shirt over top that doesn’t have a single button done up. Are you starring? Yes. Probably? Absolutely you are. 

“Make yourself at home, feel free to grab a drink from the fridge, my roommates are out of town and left all their alcohol so help yourself.” She said with a laugh. 

You heard that right? Her roommates are out of town. Just the two of you…you never know. 

You grabbed a drink from the fridge and took a seat on the couch next to her and yeah…the drink started going down faster than usual because of all the nerves in your stomach. The two of you made small talk for awhile but the conversation started flowing a little more naturally about 2 drinks in. Were you still kind of awkward as hell? Yeah…a little. But at least you warmed up to her a bit and weren’t acting so weird. About an hour later, her friends showed up and grabbed you guys to head over to the party. Honestly, things were going so well with just the two of you that you didn’t even want to go to this party but if it meant you got to spend more time with her then there you were. You got to the party and you honestly knew practically nobody. You weren’t exactly a social butterfly but Kate clearly was. She was talking to EVERYBODY. The boys at the party especially loved her. There was lots of laughing and flirting going on, you could feel the jealousy building but acting out was definitely not an option. You ended up socialising with a few of the other people at the party but for most of the night you stuck by Kate’s side, the two of you got pretty drunk together, pouring shots for one another and dancing in the pit of people to extremely loud music. There was a point where it felt like it was just you and her and nobody else was there while the music was blasting into your ears and the two of you were jumping together to the beat and singing out the lyrics to whatever song was on at the time. Kate got really close to you until some guy would come and pull her away in an attempt to make a move on her. Although, it never actually happened. Kate always ended up finding her way back to you. At one point she grabbed your hand and pulled you into the middle of the crowd as the two of you sang (screamed) the lyrics to “love story” into each other's faces. The party, as all do, started to simmer down. You guys actually ended up being some of the last people at the party, you stuck around to the point where the music was gone and most people were just sitting around chatting halfway sober. 

“Hey, I think I’m going to go home, I am super tired right now.” Kate says to you. 

“Okay, I’ll walk with you, I left my bag at your place anyways so I have to grab it.” 

“Right, sounds good.” 

Although the two of you had been singing and dancing for hours, she looked just as perfect as when you left and you were trying your hardest not to stare at her while the two of you were walking side-by-side. 

The walk back to her place was pretty quick, when the two of you got inside you went to grab your bag and get your things together. You were desperately trying to figure out what to say to her while you were organising your stuff. You didn’t want to come on too strong but you also want to make sure that she knows you had a good time…I guess just tell her exactly that?

“I had a really good time tonight, thanks again for inviting me.” You say as you’re leaning against the wall in her hallway. 

“Of course, anytime. And I did too. We should really hang out more when we come back to school.” She replies. 

Kate walks towards you and stops about a foot away leaning up against the doorframe to her bedroom. The hallway is super narrow and all you can think about is pinning her against the wall while you kiss down her neck and pull her tight by her waist. 

“Yeah I think so too. I guess I should probably head out.” You say as she looks at you with the softest eyes that you swore said “please stay”. You lingered for a second longer as the two of you were looking at each other, tired, kind of tipsy and on the verge of ripping each other's clothing off. All you wanted was for her to actually ask you to stay a little longer but before she had the chance you were already walking towards the door. 

“Have a good night y/n.” She says. “Text me when you get home safe.”

“I will. Sleep well Kate.” You reply as you turn to look at her with a smile and step out the front door. 

That goodbye felt different. It felt like there were still feelings in the air and lots that wanted to be said that wasn't. It felt like the perfect opportunity with nobody around after an amazing night together has passed but you regret none of it. Although you weren’t able to get a confirmation on whether or not Kate even likes women like you do, you knew there was definitely a type of tension between the two of you that she definitely noticed.

-- END OF PT 1 --

Taglist: @yelenaslyubov @youreatotalposer @jeyramarie @flosbelova @bridgecitybrad @justthis-stuff @chloe7076 @ailenepuff @ravenclawbitch426 @mellowladyangel @amcg0605-blog @kassies-take @yelenaswife1996 @wandanatchick @lilroachsworld @inluvwithfictionalwomen @x666hours @natashaswife4125 @onetruwhore @karmasgxrl @hopelesslyfallenninlove @setsuna1415 @swiftdazer @imobsessedwithmilfss @madamevirgo @louisprettybab @splatalia-jumpanova @jediluka @t00manyfand0ms

[the-cult-of-russo]

Just Beneath The Flames (Part 3)

Pairing: Billy Russo x Reader

Warnings: cursing, smut at some point probably lmao, zombie shit, typical canon violence. You know the drill.

A/N: Massive shoutout to @idaofinfinity for being my biggest cheerleader with everything I'm writing right now. I love all the kind words and hearing what you think, it always makes me smile. I'm so happy you guys are enjoying this story, so far, it's been fun to write.

—-----------------

You had no idea how long you and Billy had been sitting there but it felt like forever and it had gone dark. Billy had gone from intently staring out at the dead, looking like he was ready to jump out of the treehouse, to just sitting there blankly staring at the wall opposite and the silence was uncomfortable.

“I’m sure they’ll be okay,” you murmured lamely, not even feeling comfortable saying those words but trying to be comforting anyway. All you got in response was a sniff and it wasn’t really directed at you. This whole thing was making you antsy and you shifted where you sat.

“Who’s that?” he asked after the longest silence in history. You glanced at what he was looking at, seeing a picture of you and your brother tacked up on the wall. It was the only proof he’d existed and you never traveled without it. Everywhere you set up camp it was there. 

“Me and my brother Sam,” you replied, feeling your throat close up at even muttering his name. He glanced at you and seeing the anguish you couldn't hide on your face, he seemingly decided to shut up. He sighed, looking back outside. The sea of the dead had passed not too long ago but both of you knew it wouldn't do any good going right down. They could come back and then either go to the camp or you and Billy would be stuck here longer. You’d just been waiting for the roamers below to leave but it seemed like they were dead set on staying as they growled and groaned, stumbling around the tree. 

“We should wait,” you cautioned lightly, knowing what was going through his head. He glared at you then, a bright fire behind his almost black eyes.

“I can’t wait. I needta get back to see… they could be…” his mouth clamped shut audibly, a dark look passing over his face. You felt bad for him, you knew this bullshit far too well. It was why you preferred being alone now.

“If you go down there now, you’ll end up getting your legs bit. What good would you be then?” you asked, giving him a firm look and a raised brow. He took a deep inhale and you idly wondered if he was refraining from clipping you around the head. 

“I can’t just sit here with my thumb up my ass, Y/N,” he growled. You nodded, standing up and moving to the other side of the treehouse. You grabbed your bow and your arrows and moved back to the doorway with Billy watching you curiously. You crouched at the doorway, loading an arrow in your bow and focusing as you aimed it at one of the dead. You let your arrow fly and it went right into the temple, making it drop to the floor. You could have done this a little earlier but you didn’t want to risk anything drawing the crowd back. You fired arrow after arrow, some of the shots taking a little time to line up as they kept moving and being up here made it a little difficult. Especially when they went around the tree or under the treehouse. The darkness also didn’t help. But eventually, the last body dropped and you swore you heard Billy let out a sigh of relief. He didn’t wait or say anything before he was clambering down the ladder quickly. You left your bow inside before you followed him, you’d collect your arrows later. 

You didn’t really need to go with him, these weren’t your people. Yet you did feel a pull to them and you also wanted to know if they were okay. A part of you also worried about Billy and what he might find if they weren’t. Billy didn’t seem to mind you coming along, he didn’t even acknowledge it as you walked side by side, both on high alert for any stragglers. It was just past halfway there when he started to slow down and when you looked at him, his face was pale and his eyes looked wild and panicked.

“Billy?” you questioned warily, wondering if he might have seen something. He stopped and a hand came to rest on the tree next to him, the other coming to his chest and then you noticed he seemed to be having difficulty breathing as his chest heaved.

“Billy?” you asked again, more firmly this time as you moved to stand in front of him.

“I can’t… I can’t breathe,” he bit out, eyes darting around. You blinked at him with a frown before realization dawned on you. He was having a panic attack.

“It’s okay, just take deep breaths,” you murmured softly, moving closer to him. His frantic eyes landed on you then.

“I just said… I can’t breathe…” he muttered angrily through his heaving gasps. 

“Listen to me, okay? Just focus on me. It’s fine, you’re gonna be fine. Do it like this, in through the nose, out through the mouth,” you soothed in a gentle voice despite his tone, showing him what to do as you breathed in slow and deep through your nose and out through your mouth. His hand suddenly seized yours in a death grip and you’d admit he was squeezing it so tightly that it hurt like a bitch. You didn’t say anything though as he copied your motion and you repeated it with him. It took him a few goes before his breathing started to regulate and it was only once he took a few normal breaths that his eyes stopped looking so wild and he let go of your hand. He looked shocked almost by what had happened, frowning in confusion before he shook his head and started walking hurriedly again like nothing had happened. You caught up with him, keeping in step with him as you eyed him carefully.

“Sorry… I uh… I don’t know what the fuck happened,” he muttered, sounding put out as he refused to look at you.

“It’s okay, it was just a panic attack,” you reassured lightly. He didn’t stop walking but his head whipped to you with an offended look on his face.

“I don’t have panic attacks, alright?” he huffed and you rolled your eyes.

“There’s nothing wrong with having panic attacks, Billy. It doesn’t make you any less manly or anything. It’s normal in this world, the whole thing is pretty traumatic,” you frowned. He didn’t reply and you didn’t push it, he looked rather uncomfortable that you’d witnessed it. 

Before long you were weaving through the trees to get to the camp and you saw everyone milling around, the kids presumably in the tent that seemed to be set up for them. Your body relaxed infinitely seeing that they were okay and Billy made a beeline for Frank, almost barreling into him as he gave him a hug.

“The fuck man?” Frank snorted, patting Billy’s back.

“Where have you been? We were going to send a search party out,” Karen asked, watching on amused as Billy wouldn’t let go of Frank.

“We started to take bets on if you two were banging each other,” Foggy grinned impishly and you gave him a blank look at his words.

“We got caught up in a herd,” you replied, a grave look on your face. Billy moved away then and Frank’s eyes assessed him carefully.

“We thought they mighta come from this way. We couldn’t uh… we couldn’t come right away ‘cause they took fuckin’ forever to leave. She has a treehouse and we were up there, we had to wait it out,” Billy muttered with a frown. 

“Which way did they go?” Frank asked as his eyes went from Billy to you.

“South, past my camp. I think it should be fine though as long as nothing brings them back around this way. There might be a few stragglers in the forest but it should be safer now they passed through,” you explained softly. You felt a little better now they were gone, a little less like you were waiting for the other shoe to drop. You were just glad everyone was safe.

“Alright, that's good,” Frank mused, nodding seemingly to himself.

“Well, I’ve had too much excitement for one day. I think I’m gonna head out and get to bed,” you snorted ruefully, eyes drifting to Billy as he hugged Karen and they spoke quietly. You weren’t used to so much drama, not anymore. 

“You just stay safe, alright? And thanks… for keepin’ Bill safe. I know what he’s like, I bet you had a real hard time of it tryin’ to get him to stay put and wait it out,” Frank said with a knowing smile on his face. Your lips curled up a little as you nodded. 

“I’m just glad he listened,” you replied with a playful eye roll. 

“Well, don’t be a stranger. Feel free to drop in at any time,” he smiled, patting your arm before he walked over to the others. You didn’t really want to stick around and get another round of goodbyes as you’d been here earlier so you turned to make your way home. You barely made it two steps before someone grabbed your wrist and you whirled around to see Billy.

“I just… Thanks… for… you know,” he muttered awkwardly. He wouldn’t look at you and you knew he was uncomfortable about the whole thing.

“Don’t have to thank me. Like I said, shit like that’s pretty normal in this world. It’s nothing to be embarrassed about,” you said softly, hoping to put him at ease. He nodded, still not looking at you and holding himself tightly. He was still holding your wrist so you were unable to leave. His eyes finally met yours then, obsidian orbs feeling like they were looking right through you.

“Be careful out there,” his tone was heavy and serious and you nodded.

“I’ll try,” you smiled, unable to give him anything better because it wasn’t like you could predict the future. Anything could happen. He nodded tensely again and finally let go of you.

“Don’t follow me this time,” you smirked teasingly, finally earning a smile from him.

“Think I learned my lesson on that one,” he snorted, making you smile. You both looked at each other for a long moment and you felt that weirdness creep in, like you didn’t know what to say. So you just nodded before you turned around and headed back home. This time luckily you were unfollowed and there were no herds. You came across two stray roamers but you didn’t mind as you put them down. It almost felt normal once again. 

Five days later you were sitting in your treehouse and sharpening your knife. You were feeling a little antsy. This was the longest you’d set up anywhere since you had a group. After the fall of your entire group, you’d roamed around like one of the dead ones until you found this place. But now you were feeling far too cooped up. You were considering hitting up some stores, always ready to go looking for something that might prove useful or food to store for the upcoming winter. But they were a while away on foot so you were trying to motivate yourself for the trek. The closest stores were all picked clean and you knew because you were probably the last one there to take what was left. 

“Knock knock,” the voice floated from below and you stilled your motions, peeping out of the doorway to see Karen standing below your treehouse with a grin. You smiled to yourself and threw the ladder down.

“Come on up,” you smiled, making her grin widen as she made her way up. You hadn’t seen anyone from the other camp since the herd ordeal, you hadn't really had a reason to go. And while Frank had told you that you could go at any time, you didn’t really want to if you didn’t have a reason. It felt weird, like you were intruding almost. Karen was a little breathless when she got to the top and snorted at herself as she flopped to sit on the floor, wiggling out of her backpack.

“I hope you don’t mind me just turning up. Billy told me where you were, or more like he drew me a little map,” she laughed lightly, waving around a scrap piece of paper in her hand.

“But I��m not very good with directions and I got a little lost… found you in the end anyway,” she beamed and you snorted a little.

“I don’t mind,” you shrugged with a smile. It was nice to see her, you really liked her. 

“I got you a gift,” she grinned mischievously, rummaging around in her backpack for a moment. You were about to tell her she didn’t need to get you anything but then suddenly, in her hand you saw a chocolate bar and you felt like the world had stopped turning for a moment. When was the last time you’d even seen one of those things? You couldn't even remember. She handed it to you and you took it carefully as if it was some sacred object as you blinked at it.

“Where the hell did you find this?” you asked incredulously, turning your eyes to her and her shit-eating grin.

“Some of the guys went on a run to the next town over, picked up some things. There were a few candy bars and obviously the kids got first picks and then me and Sarah. There wasn’t enough for everyone and the guys were fighting over the last one. Billy took it and we all thought he ate it, but when I asked him where to find you he gave it to me. So technically, it’s a gift off Billy,” she shrugged with a smirk. You were a little surprised at the gesture but you wondered if he felt like he had to make up for the panic attack thing after he’d handled it so badly. 

“Well, tell him thanks,” you grinned, ripping it open. You didn’t even care as you ate it greedily with a moan, Karen watching you amused.

“I know, right? It was like the best thing I’d eaten in my life,” she giggled. She wasn’t wrong. Candy bars and snacks were something you took for granted in the old world, never really understanding that at some point in your life you’d never see them again. You doubted you’d ever see one again after this so you tried to savor it yet still ate it like a woman starved at the same time, unable to help yourself.

“Holy shit, that was amazing,” you murmured after you’d done, unabashedly licking the chocolate from the wrapper and she smiled at you.

 

“So, how have things been?” she asked amicably as she shifted to be more comfortable on the floor.

“The same old shit, you know how it is,” you snorted, making her laugh.

“Yeah, it’s kinda boring without TV and things to do now,” she mused with a sad smile.

“Yep. But the boring is a little better than the overexcitement of running for your life so…” you trailed off ruefully. You did miss it a little though. The being on the road constantly, the never having to sit down with nothing to do but have your morbid thoughts consume you. It had given your brain something else to focus on than all you’d lost and now it was all that was going on in your brain on a loop. You didn’t miss being hungry or feeling unsafe and tired, but you were itching to be out there once more. You didn’t like it but couldn't shake it. You should be happy you found somewhere safe, especially after meeting Karen’s group. But you didn't feel happy at all. You felt trapped and uncomfortable, it all felt far too stale. 

“How’s Billy doing?” you asked, going back to sharpening your knife. 

“He’s doing okay… Not gonna ask about everyone else?” she asked, a teasing lilt to her voice that made you look up. She had a sly grin painting her face that made you tilt your head as you realized just why she was looking at you that way. You huffed and shook your head.

“Not like that, I just… After the herd thing… he was a little… I don’t know,” you shrugged, not feeling comfortable with outright telling her he’d had a panic attack. With how he’d reacted with you, you were sure he didn’t want everyone knowing. It almost felt like betraying his trust somehow even though you were sure he didn’t really trust you anyway. Karen's amused face slipped as she nodded with a small smile.

“He’s been through a lot… lost a lot, just like Frank. I’m pretty sure he has some PTSD but he refuses to even acknowledge it,” she murmured with a frown. He seemed to type to do that, try and sweep his problems under a rug because he thought it made him seem weak. 

“He seems okay though, things have gone back to normal,” she added at your thoughtful face and you nodded. You both spoke about mundane things for a while, both talking about your pasts. You learned she used to be a journalist and also worked for Matt and Foggy who had been lawyers back then. It was nice to get to know her better and you felt like you bonded a bit. It was both a blessing and a curse because it felt good to connect with someone again but you didn’t want to get attached. They’d probably all wind up dead at some point, everyone did. You convinced her to leave before it got dark, not wanting her to walk back in the blanket of the night sky and she’d relented, asking that you’d turn up for dinner at some point soon. You’d acquiesced to get her to leave before she wound up lost in the dark woods and then she left, refusing you to walk her back. Once she was gone, the treehouse felt uncomfortably silent and you didn’t like it. The silence only made your mind louder and you growled, getting annoyed with yourself. The whole time, with and without your group, all you’d wanted was to find somewhere safe to settle down and take root. Somewhere where maybe you could start a life of some kind, even if the world had fallen to pieces. But now here you were, mostly safe and in a good place, yet you didn't feel settled or satisfied. You hated how this new world had changed you, made you rougher around the edges, harder. You’d had to do things you never thought yourself capable of doing and it had changed you. There was a darkness lurking inside of you now that you couldn't seem to get rid of you and really didn’t like it. You decided to get an early night to try and avoid your thoughts and memories plaguing you. Maybe it was best if you left, best if you just looked at a map and picked somewhere to travel to. It would give your mind some reprieve from the constant attacks, give yourself a purpose. Maybe that’s what you were lacking. You’d finally achieved your goal only to find you had nothing left to do, nothing left at all. 

~

You rummaged through the cupboards angrily, knocking things over in the process in your frantic search but you only came back empty-handed. Again. You let out a frustrated growl, slamming the door shut with a loud thud as you stood back up and raked your hand through your hair. You really had no idea what to do. Your brother was on borrowed time here and there wasn’t a damn thing you could do to stop it. He needed a lot of medication for his heart condition but when the world fell, he’d had some with him. Pretty soon into the hell the world had turned into, you’d been more than aware you needed to stock up and thankfully, you’d been able to since people hadn't cleaned out pharmacies completely. But after 7 months, his meds ran out and you couldn't find them anywhere. You’d find one but not others but he needed all of them to be able to survive. The most important was Warfarin and you hadn’t been able to find it in almost two months. This was the fifth pharmacy you’d hit up and yet again, there was nothing. 

“We can’t find anything,” Lucas frowned as he came into the room you were in. You looked at him, anguish all over your face as he watched you sympathetically. You appreciated the guys coming every time to try and help the search. 

“I don’t… I don’t know what to do,” you lamented, biting down hard on your lower lip as you felt it tremble.

“We’ll head back home and look at the maps again, find another pharmacy,” he murmured as he rubbed your back soothingly. You sniffled with a nod but deep down you knew it was useless. Each time you went you had to go further and further out to find a new pharmacy and you hated being away from Sam not knowing if he’d be there when you got back. You were always aware in the back of your mind that this could happen to Sam, knowing how bad his heart was. He needed a lot of pills and a lot of monitoring but you’d stupidly convinced yourself he’d be okay. That you could handle it. But you couldn't handle it and if he didn’t get his meds soon then he’d be dead and you’d have failed him. Lucas led you out of the empty pharmacy where Oliver was waiting by the truck with a sad look on his face.

“I’m sorry, Y/N,” he sighed and you knew he meant it. Sam was amazing and everyone in the group could see it. There wasn't a mean bone in his body and he always made time to make people smile and try to brighten their day. They’d all seen his light get dimmer these past few months and everyone was worried. Sam was all you had left of your family, of your old life. You had no idea what happened to your parents but you knew they were most likely dead. You and Sam never spoke of them. But Sam was your entire world and he had been since before the end. You’d doted on him, being close siblings that helped each other with everything. There wasn’t anything you wouldn't do for him then and now but this was something out of your control and you loathed it. 

When you got back to the camp, a bunch of tents near a quarry, you made a beeline for Sam’s tent, knowing he’d be in there. He’d been feeling pretty lethargic lately, looking paler than usual. You felt like a time bomb was waiting to explode, especially when you couldn't get the meds he needed to stop him from getting a blood clot. It was late, everyone else asleep with how long it had taken you to get there and back. Lucas and Oliver went to their respective tents as you moved over to where Sam’s was, next to yours nearest the water. You felt a weird sensation as you got outside his tent, like trickling water down your neck that made you feel uneasy. You told yourself it was because you knew you’d failed yet again and you couldn't face him and tell him. You knew how it would go, how it went every time. He’d smile at you and tell you it was fine, that you were trying your best. But your best wasn’t good enough and it sure as fuck wouldn't save him. You heaved a sigh and unzipped his tent, climbing in. He was on his side, half in his sleeping bag. He hated zipping it all that way up, said it made him feel trapped. You toyed with the idea of not waking him, waiting until morning to give him the bad news that you'd failed once again and that you’d be gone again soon to look some more. He hated you leaving, he’d tell you he’d rather you just stayed. But you knew you wouldn't be able to sleep at all if you didn’t tell him now so you crawled over to him and shook his shoulder.

“Sammy?” you said softly, giving him another firmer shake when he didn't move. But there was no response and your heart stuttered in your chest for a moment as you felt that sensation again.

“Sam?” you asked harshly, rolling him on his back. His eyes were closed, lips slightly parted, but again, no response. Your hand went to his neck quickly to feel for a pulse but you couldn't find one.

“No… no,” you muttered in horror, tears welling in your eyes as you gripped both of his shoulders and shook him roughly.

“Wake up, Sammy! You need to wake up!” you insisted, desperation in your tone because he couldn’t be gone. His body jostled with the movement but he still didn’t stir, still wasn't breathing and you let out a broken sob as you covered your mouth. He was dead. He was dead because you were a terrible big sister who couldn't help him. He was dead and you hadn't even been here in his last moments. You felt like you couldn't breathe through your heaving sobs and then his eyes snapped open. You felt a spark of hope hit you right in the chest but it was over before it barely began as milky eyes looked back up at you. You felt far too many things in that moment, mostly complete devastation that you’d lost your little brother who meant everything to you. But more than that, you felt blind rage that you’d failed him, that you hadn’t been able to save him or even be there for him. You felt anger at the fact his radiance had been reduced to nothing more than one of the dead monsters. He groaned, a snarl on his face as his hands reached for you and you grabbed your knife ready, your hand trembling.

“I’m sorry, Sammy,” you muttered emotionlessly, sniffling before you plunged the knife through his eye as he sat up and made a move to grab you. You let go of the knife as if it had burned you, his body falling back down with a thump. All you could do was glare at his body with your knife sticking out of his head until the sun came up and Lucas found you there.

~

The next day you were in an awful mood. Your night had been plagued with memories worse than anything your brain could concoct as a nightmare and it had left you feeling the same anger as you’d felt the day your brother died. Trying to clear your head, you’d gotten up early and decided to go hunting. It gave you something to focus on as you went after a rabbit that you’d been tracking for a little over an hour. You were a ways from your camp now but you didn't care, trying to only focus on the task at hand. While your brain was somewhat distracted, you still felt that simmering anger bubbling under your skin. The rabbit finally came to a stop and you were relieved and not all at the same time. You were relieved because you didn’t want to stray too far from camp and get caught in a bad situation or get lost, but you also hated the fact it meant this whole thing was almost over and soon enough you’d be back alone at camp and dwelling on everything. You got your bow ready, pulling it back as you looked at the rabbit. You let your arrow go and it hit your target, but less than a second after your arrow landed from the left, another one did and you felt your anger hit you again. You stomped through the trees, head whipping around to the left to see a bewildered Billy looking at you through the trees.

“Mine hit first, it’s mine,” you bit out, not meaning to sound so hostile but you really weren't in the mood. 

“Right…” he drawled warily as you stalked over to the rabbit, crouching as you yanked the arrows out of it and tossed Billy’s behind you carelessly. You put your arrow back in your quiver and grabbed the rabbit by its foot, standing up. 

“Everythin’ alright?” he asked, sounding cautious and your bitter laugh sounded rough to even your own ears. 

“Nothing’s alright, Billy. I lost everyone I came to care about and now I’m alone. I finally have somewhere safe to call home but I hate it. I feel like my own skin doesn't fit anymore. I have nothing to fight for, nothing to live for, so no, nothing’s alright,” you hissed, clamping your mouth firmly shut after your rant as you realized you were ranting to someone you barely knew and it was ridiculous.

“You know what, it doesn't even matter,” you huffed, starting to stalk off back to your camp. It was a lot quicker getting back since you weren’t trying to be stealthy and your anger was making you practically power-walk all the way back. You dropped the rabbit on the floor, getting your knife out before you sat against the tree and started to prep it. It wasn't long after that Billy was there yet again, you hadn't even realized he’d been following you back. 

You didn’t bother to acknowledge him as you worked on the rabbit. You knew it wouldn't take you too long, not like the deer had. Not only was the rabbit considerably smaller but you felt like you’d done this a million and one times before, whereas with the deer, it had been your first time. Billy hovered for a long moment before he heaved a sigh, moving to sit on the floor in front of you. You glanced at him briefly, not really in the mood for company, before you looked back at your task at hand. 

“I get it, how you feel. Well, some of it anyway. I lost people too, some before the turn and some after, but I mean I got my group and that’s what I’m fightin’ for. Maybe that’s what you need too,” he murmured carefully.

“That’s the last thing I need. I already watched my old group get picked off one by one, I don’t feel like reliving it,” you muttered bitterly, finally getting the rabbit’s skin off and then working on the meat. You heard Billy blow out a sigh but you didn’t bother to look at him. 

“That’s it, come on,” he said firmly, quickly standing up and finally drawing your eyes to him.

“What?” you asked confused, shaking your head.

“I said, come on,” he repeated firmer, holding his hand out to you. 

“I’m busy,” you stated, like it was obvious as you gestured to the rabbit.

“I wasn’t askin’,” he smirked, raising a brow before he grabbed your hand and yanked you to your feet. He started tugging you away and you were far too confused to fight him as the rabbit lay half-done by the tree. 

“Where are we going?” you asked, putting your knife away as he finally let you go when you seemed to be following him willingly. 

“I know what you need. I remember back in the Marines, the whole time I’d be out there all I’d think about was finally bein’ back home. To get some rest, have some sense of security. But then I’d be home and I’d feel all kinds of wrong. It was like I didn’t belong there, didn’t fit in. I missed the… the adrenaline of it all. The fight to live, the constant battle. I belonged out there on the battlefield, not the streets of New York. I’m startin’ to think you’re a lot like me. This world… the way it is now, it’s a lot like bein’ overseas, like a warzone. And then you get that moment where everything seems to settle, where it's calm but it doesn't make you feel safe, doesn’t satisfy you. And I… I get that,” he rambled, glancing at you. You felt something wash over you and you weren’t sure what it was. Maybe it was relief at someone feeling the same way, someone who you related to.

“You still didn’t answer my question,” you smiled wryly, already feeling a little better. He smirked as he looked at you again and you both broke through the treeline. You saw the black van you knew belonged to the group and he started to lead you over to it.

“You need a purpose, need shit to do to keep you busy, to feel useful. Somethin’ that’s not so safe. We need gas for the van before we wind up runnin’ out. Won’t have much to last us soon. There’s a highway about a 2 hours drive north from here, bunch of cars up there to siphon gas from. When we passed it, we couldn't even get through, looked like it’d been there since the start, when the rush happened,” he explained and you nodded. You remembered how frantic everyone had been when everything started going to hell, how everyone thought getting out of the city was a good idea, only to get stuck in a jam of cars. You’d seen those highway graveyards before and they were creepy. But the idea of a job to do did make you feel less tense and you knew Billy was right. You’d lost your sense of purpose now you had nothing to do and no one to help. 

The ride there was mostly silent but it wasn’t uncomfortable, mostly contemplative. 

“You should let go of that guilt before it buries you,” Billy finally spoke, a knowing tone to his voice. Your head whipped to him at his words as you just stared at him for a minute. 

“What?” you asked slowly and he chuckled but it sounded a little sad.

“I know what it’s like… to carry around guilt for shit that honestly, was out of our control. Sometimes bad shit just happens and there’s not a damn thing we can do to stop it. It sucks and hurts like a bitch but drownin’ in the guilt won’t help anyone,” he murmured as he stared out at the road. You scoffed and shook your head, dragging your eyes from him to back out of the front window.

“Maybe it was my fault though. Maybe if I was better at my job I could have saved at least some of them,” you muttered bitterly. 

“You were a vet, Y/N. And yeah, some of those skills is better than nothin’, but it ain’t like you were a fuckin’ ER doctor. We all have our limits, doesn’t make it your fault,” he chided, giving you a look. 

“I just feel like… no matter what I did, it wasn’t ever enough. Every time I tried to help, it didn’t work. And with Sam… I tried for months to find the meds he needed and I couldn't find them and he wound up dead. And I wasn't even there when it happened because I was out looking for the shit he needed to stay alive. I feel like a failure,” you admitted, your voice cracking with emotion that you tried to stuff down.

“You’re not a failure, Y/N,” Billy frowned softly. 

“Well I feel like one,” you countered with a huff.

“You did what you could, I don’t doubt you gave it your all,” he muttered, still frowning. 

“Yeah and it wasn’t enough. I did my best and it wasn't ever enough. And I don’t get it…  Out of all of them, I’m the last one standing? Seriously? We had a survivalist in our group for fuck sake and if I had to take bets on who would be the last of us, it would have been him, not me. I’m just some Vet from New York who spent her spare time from work vegging out in front of the TV and eating takeout. Why the hell am I the one that made it out?” you asked angrily as you shook your head. 

“‘Cause you’re stronger than you think you are. You got a fight in you,” he argued, his tone light. Your head snapped to him again with your eyes narrowed to slits.

“My brother didn’t die because he didn’t have fight in him. He died because he was sick and I fucking failed him,” you hissed and he frowned at you.

“I don’t mean it like that. What I’m tryin’ to say is that you don’t need to be a survivalist to make it out here, don’t need a set of skills to get through. Yeah, it helps, but I ain’t all you need. Sometimes all you need is that primal drive to survive,” he said softly as he gave you a meaningful look.

“And I don’t know a damn thing about your brother but I’d bet my life on him not wantin’ to see you beat yourself up like this. He wouldn’t want you blamin’ yourself for his death. You said yourself, he was sick. That ain’t on you,” he insisted, glancing at you again. You looked away at the weight of his gaze, your fight leaving you as you knew his words were true. Sam would hate seeing you now, see you acting like this. It didn’t mean it stopped you feeling guilty though. The rest of the way went back to being silent and soon enough, Billy was pulling to a stop just before a sea of abandoned cars. You got out of the van, looking around at the eerie scene. Some of the car doors were left open and you could just picture all the panicked people fleeing as they couldn't leave in their cars as the dead rolled in. 

Billy suddenly passed you two empty duffel bags and you looked at them curiously as he got out three empty gas cans from the back of the van.

“I’m gonna get the gas. You can look in the cars, see if they have any good shit. We need food, clothes, shit for the winter. Coats and all that, stuff to layer up. Make sure you get yourself some shit too, there’s more bags in the back,” he gestured to the van and you nodded. You got to work quickly, rifling through the cars as you looked at what they had. You’d found a bunch of good shit. There were a lot of canned goods and you’d managed to fill a bag with them. You’d also found some clothes and blankets which you knew would be helpful. You’d found yourself a thicker winter coat you were excited about and you’d even found some clothes for the kids. You weren’t quite sure what size they were, unsure of their ages. But you’d guessed by sight and you hoped they’d fit. You’d put three bags in the back of the van and now you were looking in the trunk of a car with another empty bag. You’d had to put down a few stray dead ones here that had been trapped in the cars. The smell had almost made you throw up. You grinned to yourself as you found a whole pile of comics in the boot, thinking the kids might like them and it would give them something to do. You quickly stuffed them in the bag as Billy approached you.

“I got the gas, we good?” he asked. You’d already informed him of the other stuff you’d found and he’d been pretty excited to get back to camp and show everyone what you’d found.

“Yeah. We could come back another time, look through some more cars. It’s like they're never-ending,” you snorted as you glanced out at the many cars you hadn’t even got to yet. Just as Billy opened his mouth to respond, the sound of tires squealing grated on your ears. It felt like time slowed down for a second afterwards as Billy shoved you to the floor, his body over yours protectively and then the sound of gunfire pierced the air, the bullets hitting the metal of the cars and shattering the glass. You were in far too much shock to say anything, blinking up at Billy who was wearing a thunderous face.

“Stay here,” he growled. Before you could try and stop him, he was off you and at the edge of the car. He grabbed his handgun and started shooting at the people who were raining fire down on you. It worried you even more how it was rapid gunfire, you had no idea what artillery they had but it didn’t sound good. You sat up, still hiding behind the car as you stared at Billy as he kept popping his head out and firing before retreating near the trunk. Billy reloaded his gun deftly and you idly wondered where the hell he’d be hiding the extra bullets. When he cocked his gun again, he peered out from behind the car and you grabbed his jacket, pulling him back just in the nick of time as a bullet whizzed right past and landed in the car behind. Billy looked stunned, completely shocked that they almost put a bullet in his head but it didn’t seem to make him see sense, it only pissed him off more as he started firing like a madman. There was so much noise it was making your brain hurt, but then it got even worse when Billy made a mad dash for a car a little in front to the right.

“Billy! What are you doing?!” you hissed, looking at him like he was crazy. The asshole was going to get himself shot at this rate. You had no idea how many there were of them but they definitely had more gun power than you two, you were both better off trying to make a run for it the other way with the safety of the cars for cover. He ignored you though as he did it once more, getting even closer to the gunfire. Your brain was going a mile a minute as you tried to figure out the best way to get Billy to see that he should be running away from the bullets and not towards them when you heard the tires screeching once more. Only this time, it sounded like two separate sets of them. You frowned and you kneeled up, peeping through the glass on the window to see them driving away with not only their own car, but Billy’s van too. Billy let out a feral yell, no longer hiding as he jumped up and started chasing them, firing his gun as they fired right back. You felt like you were on the verge of having a heart attack and the only saving grace seemed to be how bad their aim was as they reversed quickly before high tailing it out of there. 

You stood up on shaky legs, eyes taking in the carnage of the graveyard of cars but a loud bang made you jump and whirl around. Billy was angrily punching a car and you loitered uncertainly as you watched him. His chest was heaving, eyes wild as he stopped and tried to compose himself. He rolled his shoulder before running his hands through his hair and making it all crazy.

“They took the van. I can’t believe they… It had… all the food to last us through winter, fuckin’ clothes… Curt’s medical supplies,” he sounded a mix of upset and beyond pissed and you felt the guilt start to eat away at you. If he hadn't brought you here then this wouldn't have happened. Not only were the group now without transport, which was hard enough to come by these days, or at least hard enough to find reliable transport, but they also lost a bunch of supplies. Not only the stuff you’d just loaded into the van but apparently there had already been things in there. The medical supplies were the worst, you knew from experience how hard it was to get those back. You weren’t really sure what to say to him to make him feel better, not when this was because of you. So you just watched him pace hopelessly, looking like he was lost and full of rage. What the fuck were you supposed to do now?

Taglist: (if you’ve been asked to be tagged and aren’t here, it wouldn’t let me tag some people.)

@firexfate

@blanchedelioncourt

@ariesbutalibra

@sunshinedaisies-anddeath

@snowkestrel

@music-indie-tv

@idaofinfinity

@sweetserendipity65

@ramadiiiisme

@k-marzolf

@celestialams

@woowwwee

[folliesandfolderols]

Writing prompts day 70 (part one)

From this prompt list. If you’ve read this far, I’m not sure you need any explanation, but the short version is I hadn’t written any fiction since 2019, I set a goal to write at least 150 words/day in 2024, and this list was my way to restart. Also I abruptly decided on day 2 I would write an entire Tim/Damian story connecting all the prompts, because I am Good at Judging My Limits. /sarcasm Anyway, I finished the rough draft a while ago and am now unlocking the old entries as I edit.

Read from the beginning here, or on ao3 here

Days 62-69 here

***

51. "Fuck, I need/want you so bad."

85. "Th-There are people outside this door--" "Well, this isn't about them, is it?"

145. "Shit, I'm so fucking hooked on you it's not even funny."

148. “Don’t make too many noises or we’ll get caught.” “That’s part of the thrill."

***

A muffled giggle and the sound of a phone camera jarred him to wakefulness, though he kept his eyes closed and muscles relaxed out of habit until he realized where he was.

Blinking his eyes open, he whispered, “Cass?”

His older sister stood on the low bench next to Damian’s bed, phone in hand. Her dark eyes danced with mischief.

Shit. He'd probably slept through most of the morning, then. Tim carefully angled himself up to a sitting position, pressed his finger to his lips, and tiptoed out with Cass following closely behind. Once the door clicked shut behind them, he turned to her. “What are you doing here?”

She shrugged. “Duke and I have a lunch date, and we decided to meet here first. But also I heard what Dick said on comms last night. Wanted to check on Damian. I didn’t expect to see you in his bed.” She paused, long enough that the heat crawling up Tim’s face made it all the way to his hairline. “Though maybe I should have.”

“Well, I didn’t expect to be in his bed, so I don’t know how you could’ve,” Tim replied with perfect honesty. His shoes were just outside the door, so he grabbed them off the floor. He checked his pockets, realized he’d left his wallet and keys in the car, and started heading for the front door. 

Cass followed once more. “Hey. Little brother. Do you really think you’re fooling me?”

Tim stopped in his tracks and tilted his head up toward the ceiling, blowing out a defeated sigh. “What do you mean,” he said tonelessly.

She moved to stand next to him and bumped his shoulder with her own. “I mean the fact that you two have had sex and now you don’t know what to do with him. Your entire body’s screaming about it. I wouldn’t have expected you to be so upset.”

Tim snorted in derision. “Why wouldn’t I be upset about it?” He started for the stairs again while she easily paced him. “It was a stupid thing to do and now it’s biting me in the ass every day.”

“I’m pretty sure biting you in the ass is what Damian would like to do every day. But that’s none of my business.” She gave Tim an angelic smile in response to his outraged glare. 

Tim cartwheeled down the stairs to give himself an out from the conversation, but she followed, sliding down the bannister on her stockinged feet. They arrived at the ground floor in the same moment. Tim dashed for the door, but Cass beat him there and stood with her back pressed to the wood, covering the doorknob.

The playful gleam in her eyes faded as he stood there, shoulders slumped, avoiding her gaze. “Tim. I’m worried about you.”

“I know, I know, it was a huge mistake and I’ll���"

She interrupted with a confused twist of her mouth. “No, I’m not saying that it was a mistake. That’s not something I can tell from body language. But every time I’ve seen you for the past several weeks, you’ve been moving like you were shot in the gut and you're scared it'll happen again.” She took a breath, then continued with deliberation, “And Damian moves like he’s been stabbed in his heart and the knife is still stuck in his chest. If you’re hurting each other, that is my business.”

“Damian isn't hurting me.” Tim stared at his shoes, still clutched in one hand. “I don't know where that's coming from.”

“But you are hurting him?”

He shrugged, shame closing his throat too tightly to let words escape.

Realization dawned on her face, and with it, concern. "You're hurting him and yourself. Don't do that.” She darted forward and pulled him into an embrace. “Don't hurt yourself.”

“I don't know what to do, Cass,” he croaked, letting himself lean into her wiry strength. Her head only came up to his chin but she was so powerful, one of the few people in his life who needed him not at all but wanted him all the same.

She tightened her arms around him until his ribs creaked, but the pressure felt good. Grounding. "Because you're scared. I get that."

"Yeah." His temples throbbed with the tears that wanted to form, but he fought them back. He wasn't a child, for God's sake.

"What if you weren't?" She stepped back to meet his gaze, and this time he didn't try to look away.

"What if I weren't scared? I guess then I wouldn't be in this mess."

She shook her head, a fond smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. "No. I mean, what would you do if you had no fear?"

"Oh." Tim thought about it. He was brave, but it was in spite of the fear he carried with him, not due to its lack. He could never be like Stephanie. "I don't know. It's hard to picture."

"Then pretend you're fearless. See what you would do." She jumped up and kissed his cheek. "I don't like to see my brothers sad. Fix it."

"Yes, ma'am." Tim gave her a mocking salute, and she grinned as she swung the door open to let him out.

***

For the rest of the week, Tim neither evaded Damian nor sought him out, but Damian avoided him. Tim couldn't blame him for that, but he hadn't realized how often Damian initiated contact between them until it stopped. The absence hurt.

Cass's question kept surfacing at the most inconvenient moments in his thoughts, while he was in the middle of a presentation, or when he was trying to fall asleep: What would you do if you had no fear?

On Friday night, he lay down on his couch again to figure it out once and for all. If he weren't afraid of Damian—

No. That wasn't fair. Tim wasn't afraid of Damian, not any longer. He was afraid of himself, of the power he had to wound whoever was reckless enough to want a relationship with him.

So. Pretend sick terror didn't flood every cell in his body each time he contemplated a real, actual relationship with the baby bat. Pretend he was brave like Steph. No need to figure out why, just figure out what he'd do in the absence of the fear.

Put like that, the answer was clear. He'd pursue Damian like he had everything else he'd really wanted. He'd work on earning Damian’s affection and trust, while allowing himself to acknowledge his own desire for the same. He would accept the possibility of failure while refusing to allow it to dictate his choices.

“Fine!” he groaned to no one, picking up his phone.

First, he texted, i hate u for being right all the time to Dick, then copied the message and sent it to Kon too, after deleting the all the time part. 

Next, he texted Damian. hey where are u rn

Almost immediately, Damian responded, I refuse to engage with you via text until you begin utilizing the punctuation skills of a first grader at least. 

A pause, then he added, I’m not far from your home. Currently I’m in the first course of a working dinner with some business partners from London and Father, and bored out of my mind with the inanity of the conversation.

Tim smiled involuntarily. Bruce had invited him to that one and he’d turned him down, so Damian must’ve been the backup plan.

Which restaurant?

Di Fratelli, in the Hotel Belle Monico.

Rolling to his feet, Tim headed for the bedroom. He had some dressing to do.

***

Every upscale restaurant in town was familiar with Bruce Wayne and his coterie of offspring both official and not, so when Tim walked into Di Fratelli the maitre d’ immediately asked, “Joining the Misters Wayne, sir?”

Tim nodded, and followed him to the semi-private area of the dining room where Bruce was charming the money out of a group of five men and women whose entire selves screamed Financial District. Damian was at least giving the appearance of paying attention, although the subtle curl of his lip gave away his true opinion of the proceedings. One of the women touched his arm and hand four times just while Tim was walking over. Damian glanced up and caught Tim’s gaze on her hand. His eyes widened the slightest bit.

Bruce’s casual expression changed to something with genuine warmth as he saw Tim approach. “Ah, here’s Tim! Hey, sport, didn’t think you’d be able to make it. Sit down!”

Tim accepted the extra chair the server offered him, but pulled it up next to Damian at the end of the table, separating him from the woman. Sitting down, he allowed his calf to press against Damian’s, following with his leg when the other would have pulled his own away. Even just that much contact felt so good. How could he have missed the fact that his whole body felt like it was spinning directionless in space until it grounded itself against Damian?

Directing his most charming smile around the table, he said, “I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to touch base with some of our most important business partners, Bruce. Plus, the truffle ravioli here are to die for.”

He kept up the flow of conversation effortlessly during the meal, something that couldn’t be said of Damian, who stayed largely silent and startled almost visibly when Tim allowed his hand to rest casually on his thigh under the tablecloth. Tim allowed one corner of his mouth to pull up in amusement at the reaction. Damian would definitely notice that and seethe about it, but he also wasn’t doing anything to force Tim to remove his touch.

After an hour of business dealings under the guise of camaraderie, Damian excused himself. Tim gave him a full five minutes before looking into the middle distance and feigning surprise. “Oh, I see an old friend on the other side of the restaurant! Excuse me for a moment, please.”

Hands in his pockets, he wandered in the general direction of the restrooms, which also took him to the hotel proper through the inside entrance. He’d barely made it into the hall before a side door opened and Damian’s hand dragged him through it into a conference room with only a long table, video conferencing screen, and a dozen office chairs, plus a tiny dim lamp that currently provided the only light in the room.

Tim raised his eyebrows. “What’s up?”

Damian was scowling, but Tim could tell his heart wasn’t in it. “Why are you here?”

Tim tilted his head in mock consideration. “Well, the food is really good.” Damian’s frown deepened. Right. Sincerity. “But also, I was worried. I don’t like the way we left things the last time you were at my place, and I haven’t seen you since you got hurt.”

With a shake of his head, Damian reached for the doorknob. “Save your worry for yourself. I’m fine.”

Without missing a beat, Tim grabbed his outstretched hand and threaded his fingers through Damian’s. “I’m not surprised to hear that. You’re an expert in carrying on even when wounded.”

Damian scoffed, but Tim noticed he made no attempt to free his hand. “Don’t flatter yourself. You couldn’t possibly wound me, any more than Faust did.”

“Bullshit.” With a tug at his fingers, Tim pulled Damian closer and wrapped his arm around his waist. “You didn’t deserve what I did.”

Damian’s other arm hung limp by his side. “I expected nothing else. The fault was mine, for being foolishly sentimental.”

Ouch. Tim winced into Damian’s jacket lapel. “No. And I’m sorry for teaching you to expect that from me.”

“Drake.” Damian pushed him back slightly by his shoulder, but kept his hand there after Tim had moved. “You haven’t honestly answered the question. Why are you here?”

“I didn’t want to wait to see you and apologize. I already let too long pass since the last time.” Tim shrugged. “That’s the honest truth.” He let the hand he still had on Damian’s torso slide down a couple inches, just inside the waistband of his pants. “And I missed touching you.”

Damian went still, eyes narrowing. Despite his hesitation, his hand moved over Tim’s arm in what looked like an unconscious caress. “What is this? What are you playing at?”

Tim couldn’t say he didn’t deserve the skepticism. And Damian definitely deserved more of an explanation, but that was complicated by the fact that Tim actually had no idea what he was doing here. He was just flying blind with no plan other than to get into Damian’s pants. 

“I’m not playing,” He settled for saying, and tugged Damian closer by a belt loop. “I told you a while ago that I didn't know what I wanted.” Damian nodded. “I'm sorry it took me so long to figure out. I really want to do this with you, as long as you do too.” 

Damian’s breathing started to pick up speed. He made one more attempt to pretend this wasn’t going to happen, but his entire body was leaning into Tim. “Th-there are people outside this door—”

“Well, this isn’t about them, is it?” Watching carefully for any objections, he moved his hand to Damian’s fly, palming his cock through the fabric.  He was already half-hard, and getting more so under Tim’s touch. With the hand not otherwise occupied, Tim slipped open the buttons of Damian’s shirt. He made an appreciative sound at the sight of his torso, still sporting the patterned marks he'd left. God. He was used to seeing beautiful bodies, since the superhero circuit rarely produced anything else, but Damian’s gorgeously human muscles and warm brown skin were next tier. 

Tim licked across his chest, one long swipe of his tongue. Damian moaned, loud and obscene, and Tim’s breath twisted in his throat at the sound. “Don’t make too many noises or we’ll get caught.”

Damian lifted a sardonic eyebrow that failed to hide his anticipation. “That’s part of the thrill. Right?” He backed up to the table and pulled Tim along with him. Sitting on its edge, he splayed his legs wide. 

Tim straddled one of his thighs so that his cock pressed hard into the thick muscle. “You’re not wrong about that. Fuck.” Angling up on his toes, he kissed Damian once, twice, three times. Tiny, light kisses meant to show liking rather than lust, though both were fighting for dominance in his chest at the moment. “I want you so bad.”

Damian’s only reply was to grab his ass with both hands and yank him closer so Tim’s leg was pressed to his erection too. Tim cupped the back of his neck and pulled him down to kiss him more thoroughly. Slow, tender, like they had all the time in the world. Tension drained out of Damian’s shoulders as Tim sucked on his lower lip, gently drawing it between his teeth. He’d felt out of control for so long, but with Damian submitting to his touch without question, it felt like he’d gotten a little of it back again. He ground into Damian’s thigh, letting him feel how hard he was. “Shit, I’m so fucking hooked on you it’s not even funny.”

Damian’s face had gone intent with desire, eyes hooded and cheeks flushed. He moved with Tim, their hips circling in a slow, steady rhythm that had them both panting for breath. “Drake—this is—so foolish.”

“Mm, see, you say that but I don’t see you trying to get away.” Tim wanted to strip him down entirely until every barrier between them had been discarded. He wanted to hold him so tightly that Damian couldn’t sense the distance between them. He wanted to make Damian feel so happy that he forgot how much Tim had hurt him, for a little while at least. He settled for hugging him closer, nuzzling his cheek and nipping his jaw. Liquid heat was seeping into his core, spreading from their points of contact in a viscous flow of want. “Dami. You feel amazing. Don’t wanna stop.”

“No.” Damian kissed him again, a little desperation bleeding into the pressure of his lips, the blunt pain of his nails digging into Tim’s skin through his clothes. “You aren’t allowed to stop. Finish what you’ve started.”

“Yeah.” Tim picked up the pace, the part of his mind that was always observing from the outside reminding him that Bruce was still sitting at that table and no doubt wondering where they’d both disappeared to. Damian pressed his face into Tim’s shoulder, breath coming out in labored sighs as their bodies slid together, the discomfort of their situation irrelevant in the face of their need. “C’mon, we gotta hurry.”

“I can do that,” Damian mumbled into his collar, sounding drunk. “If you don’t kill me like this first.”

Tim chuckled and kissed his ear. “No dying. Not till after I get you off, at least.” He angled on his toes and moaned as the pressure turned exactly right.  “Are you close?”

Damian nodded against his neck, whimpering. His grip tightened and loosened on Tim’s hips in the spasmodic fashion that always gave his approaching orgasm away. An overwhelming wave of fondness swamped Tim as he recognized the signs. “Here. Let me—" He unzipped Damian’s pants and pulled his cock free of his underwear just enough to duck and fit his mouth over the tip. 

Damian went immobile for a moment. His hands flew to Tim’s shoulders and seized them with painful pressure. Tim only had to wait a couple of seconds before come flooded his mouth. He swallowed fast and licked Damian clean while he twitched and made little noises of protest about the overstimulation.

Tim straightened again and efficiently put Damian’s cock away, pressing a last kiss to his mouth like a parent's final benediction to a band-aid. “Thank you,” he whispered against his lips, before adjusting his own erection to an angle better suited to public situations. “See you back out there.”

Damian said nothing for a second, clearly trying to catch up. Just before the door swung shut behind Tim, he heard, “Wait—"

In the restroom, Tim washed his hands and rinsed his mouth before popping a breath mint from the complimentary basket on the counter. His balls ached in protest, and he was dizzy from lack of blood making it to his head.

“Worth it,” he told his reflection with a grin, and headed back to the restaurant.

day 70 (part two) here

[tadpolesonalgae]

hello my love! just wanted to say ive been following you for so long now, and watching you get freer when you interact with anons is so nice. like, you used to reply in a very formal-ish manner, but recently ive noticed youve been more casual-y and it makes me so happy 🥹

(not that its bad to be formal but i hope you know what i mean 😭)

it kinda feels like we are all becoming a big group of besties lol

also, i just woke up a few hours ago and started reading cmbthy, and im at the part where eris is teaching reader to use a crossbow. havent had the time to continue reading, but im going to go back to it rn.

but the part where she traded the earrings for the ring gave me so much satisfaction i cant put it in words lol 💀like yesss babygirl you trade those ugly ass earrings for ringssss 😙

also az acting like an azhole 😒 but i know you will make me like him again so im not scared 😌

-❣️

You’ve made me so reminiscent now ☹️☹️☹️

I remember stressing out about being as polite as I could when replying to asks so no one would feel I was being rude, or be scared to talk with me if they wanted, but I hadn’t realised how stark the difference has become 🫠

(I used to refuse to use emojis when replying because it felt too flippant 🫢)

I’m feeling more confident now to just type more or less how I would speak since everyone’s been so lovely and normal when writing in—I’ve thankfully never had anyone rampaging through my inbox which has certainly helped 🫣

Also my lovely named anons too, it’s nice getting to see familiar signs at the end of messages and become friendly with how you type and talk 🧡💛

‘also, i just woke up a few hours ago and started reading cmbthy, and im at the part where eris is teaching reader to use a crossbow.’

Ah, yes. The Crossbow Scene. That will be significant later 😌

(At least he’s teaching her some useful things separate from her magic 🫣)

‘but the part where she traded the earrings for the ring gave me so much satisfaction i cant put it in words lol 💀like yesss babygirl you trade those ugly ass earrings for ringssss 😙’

I’m so relieved because I was genuinely a little worried about how people might take it? I know for the most part the tides seem to be set against Az, so I wasn’t that concerned, but it’s really funny getting to see so many responses almost cheering reader on for getting rid of them 🤭😭🧡💛

‘also az acting like an azhole 😒 but i know you will make me like him again so im not scared 😌’

Oh! I’ve had some time to think about what’s going to happen in between this next part and the end (my heart did a scary thing when I typed that. I’m not ready for this series to end) so I’m so looking forward to writing it!!! I hope you get to enjoy it too when it’s ready!! 🧡💛

[velvetnviolentviolets]

Get To Know The Author

name : Kay

pronouns :  she/her

preference of communication : Honestly I have a huge preference for discord. I don't trust tumblr IM to actually alert me. Ive recently learned tumblr has been eating my asks too. If I don't reply to an ask or DM me PLEAS reach out to me. I will NEVE outright ignore something. If I don't think something is going to work for our muses I will reach out to you. 

most active muse :  Kat is my loudest and most demanding. After that would be Her brother Kass, Feyre, and then our spotty maybe I'm here maybe I'm not - Emmett.  

experience / how many years : Ohhh boy. I've been doing the rp thing off and on since 2010. There was a five year chunk in recent years where I disappeared for a bit but the lovely @sharpayevcns pulled me back in a few months ago and I am so appreciative that she did. <3 

best experience : Discovering the people here that make me feel safe enough to obsess over threads. You guys have absolutely made my return to tumblr. If I were to delete my blog with nothing but my connection with you guys to show for it - Well I would be absolutely fine with that. You guys are amazing and will absolutely be tagged in this. 

rp pet peeves : I keep running into situations where I get heavily invested in plotting something (Drawing, writing head cannons, making playlists, planning cannon events. . .I literrally brushed up on a whole ass language for a plot) Only to have those people completely leave me on read. I am not a pushy partner in the least. I would be more than happy to wait a month for a reply. But I need communication. I need feedback if something doesn't sit right for you. I need reciprocated enthusiasm. You don't have to show It the same way I do but I need some show of enthusiasm otherwise it just feels uncomfortable and I feel annoying and restrained. That's not what I'm here for. I've honestly made the decision to start unfollowing people based on a three strikes basis. No hard feelings. I just don't want to follow anyone who doesn't bring the same energy I do. 

fluff, angst, or smut :ALL OF IT! While I'm becoming more and more selective about who I write smut with I LOVE writing smut ESPECIALLY if its born of post Angst fluff. Actually almost exclusively. There is nothing that gets my muses motor going like post Angst Fluff! 

plots or memes : Augh! Don't make me pick. I love Plotting but sometimes nothing really gets the juices flowing like memes do. I cant tell you how many times a simple meme interaction help set a pivotal point in a plot. ALSO- Memes are usually what help me forego my shy nature. While my muse outwardly gives NONE of the Ducks. . .I do . I give all of the Ducks so memes help  me loosen up. I'm not responsible for the haphazard neuroSpicy creature you meet once the shyness has fallen away. You've been warned.

long or short replies : It depends on my mood and attention span. There is a Adderall shortage right now so I have only been taking my Adderall on work days so Ive had a VERY hard time focusing o replies as of late. When Im on top of my Game I am LONGWINDED AF .Please don't ever feel like you have to match me because there are times where I will write you a novel and we were only supposed to be writing a sentence or two. It just happens and Im sorry.  time to write : Ha! um . . . Well I work Graveyard  Thursday- Saturday from 8PM-9:30ish AM (PST)  On slow nights I do write here and there but for the most part I can be found here pretty sporadically. If I have something going on during my weekend that I have to be a daytime person for then ill be up during the day time. OTHERWISE- Mostly evening and spooky hours . 

are you like your muses : I could draw some parallels with each of them but I dont think I am like any of them. 

tagged by: The Alluring  @wynterlanding ~<3

@grimmusings @sharpayevcns @godccmplex <3

[smoll-tangerine]

UN AMOUR D’ÉTÉ, a timestamp mini-series (2/5)

[14:45] → [11:27] → [10:00]

[a/n]: not my small road trip being almost a whole year ago and i’m only posting part ii now. how do i still have ppl following me and my irregular posting and writing schedule, idek🫠

you visit a small town with your friends and you somehow keep bumping into this really cute boy at every place you visit.

[11:27] It was the second day of your small getaway with your friends. You all decided to visit this small island across the bridge of the town you were staying in, where a small community was located. You heard there was a famous bakery and tiny jam factory that produced hand-made jam, and you knew you had to visit those two places.

Jennie decided to open the roof of her convertible car so that you, Seulgi, and Yuqi could enjoy the crisp ocean breeze.

You were surprised to find out that there was a long line for the bakery. You knew it was famous but not to the point that people would line up for it even though it was something you should have expected.

“It’s alright,” Seulgi said nonchalantly. “Let’s just visit the jam factory first.”

The jam factory was located right across the street from the bakery, where a line was luckily not spotted. You were so excited that Jennie and Yuqi had to hold your hands and cross the street with you like a child so that you wouldn’t get run over.

“So, a little birdie tells me that a boy asked for your number?” Jennie said in a singsong-like tone.

“Who asked for my number?” you feigned innocence, to which Yuqi rolled her eyes.

With the worst timing ever, your phone just had to chime at that exact moment, signaling you of an incoming text message. This was one of the instances you regretted not putting it on silence.

Jennie snickered. “Right.”

“Shut up,” you muttered as you quickly sneaked a peek at your phone and typed up a reply. Jaehyun had asked you what were you doing today. You responded that you were visiting a small jam factory with your friends.

𝙹𝚊𝚎𝚑𝚢𝚞𝚗: 𝙽𝚘 𝚠𝚊𝚢!

You frowned at his reply. You, however, didn’t get a chance to type out a response when all of a sudden, Yuqi pulled you to try some apple jam. You four then decided that the cute jams in the jar would make a cute souvenir when you suddenly heard a familiar voice.

“Can I help you with anything, ladies?”

Your body frozen at the sight of Jaehyun and his dimpling smile. Screw his dimples — God really gave him everything, huh.

“What are you doing here?” you asked, suddenly very aware of the stares you were getting from your friends.

“I work here,” he answered and looked over at your friends with a raised brow.

“Oh.” Of course, that was a dumb question. You then motioned your friends. “Jaehyun, this is Jennie, Seulgi, and Yuqi.”

The man introduced himself. You only hoped that you wouldn’t die of embarrassment on the spot as your friends not-so-subtly smiled at him because of course they knew who Jaehyun was, no thanks to Yuqi and her big ass mouth. But thankfully, they left you two alone.

“I thought you worked at the record store?” you questioned him a bit playfully. “Are you following me?”

“I thought I was the local here?” He smirked and then crossed his arms. “What are the odds of you visiting the two places I happen to work part-time at? Is this a sign?”

“A sign for what?”

He shrugged one of his shoulders. “A sign for us to actually meet up for a date instead of meeting randomly like this.”

You let out something between a chortle and a scoff. “You use that line often?”

“Only on girls I’m interested,” he answered cheekily. “So, only on you.” He leaned in closer. “Is it working?”

If your stutter and hot cheeks weren’t an indication of your possible feelings, you honestly didn’t know how else to respond since you were so flustered. It wasn’t every day that a man as fine as Jaehyun would come onto you so strongly.

“A-a little.”

He chuckled lowly. “Are you free tomorrow?”

“I guess I can make some time for you,” you replied, trying to play it cool. Thank God your friends weren’t next to you to witness how embarassing you were.

“Text me your hotel and I’ll come pick you up,” he told you, his demeanour evidently brighter than five minutes ago.

“Sounds like a plan.”

Jaehyun then brushed away a strand of hair and tucked it behind your ear with a small, shy smile.

“It’s a date.”

[criminalmindzjunkie]

Hungry Eyes

masterlist

Summary: Spencer is tired of hiding your relationship. 

A/N: The idea for this fic came from a lovely anon that requested a fic based on She’s So Nice by Pink Guy. I also drew inspo from Hungry Eyes by Eric Carmen (strange mix, but stay with me here.) So basically, a lot of Dom!Spencer goodness. I’d like to say a huge thank you for almost 1k followers, because wow. I never imagined 5 people would actually want to read my writing. I love you all, and I hope you all enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. Let me know if you’d like to be tagged in future works!

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem! Reader

Warnings: swearing, jealousy, degradation, spitting, slapping, oral sex (male and female receiving), spanking, vaginal penetration, unprotected sex

Word Count: 5.5k

           “That is one fine piece of ass. Don’t think I could get any work done with a sweet little thing like that prancing around my precinct,” mutters yet another sleezeball detective, beady eyes trained on you like a lion might study their prospective prey. It’s moments like these that Spencer has to remind himself that patience is a virtue – that he must bite his tongue because he’s at work and that means he has to act professional. Even if those around him don’t seem capable of affording him the same luxury.

           So, it’s with a clenched jaw and all the self-restraint that he can muster that Spencer forces himself to focus on the task at hand. Because Spencer is a professional, and there are more pressing matters that demand his undivided attention. The detective could be dealt with later – in the form of a complaint to the higher ups. But for now, patience.

           Usually, this wouldn’t be a problem. Years on the job had taught Spencer to remain level headed no matter the circumstance. Usually, Spencer could tune out the locker room talk in favor of immersing himself into the case. But when it came to you, or rather, people who dared to look upon you with eyes laden with lustful intentions, Spencer had a rather short fuse.

           It happens often, and he supposes that he shouldn’t be surprised. You’d certainly turned his head the first time he was fortunate enough to lay eyes on you. He’d nearly broken his neck trying to steal another glimpse of you as you walked past him on your way to Emily’s office on your first day. No one would ever describe Spencer Reid as forward, but on that day, he was the most brazen he’d ever been.

           Throwing caution to the wind, Spencer made a split-second decision stop you and introduce himself.

           It was the best decision he would ever make.

           So, yes – he understood why the head of everyone you passed turned your way, eager to bask in your unparalleled beauty. But that didn’t mean that he had to like it. In fact, every time Spencer caught some imprudent bastard leering at you, he had to remind himself that enacting physical force on another person with no real reason could cost him his job. That, and he was above resorting to violence – or at least he was, until you came around.  

           Part of his anger was rooted in the obvious lack of respect. It didn’t matter if Spencer held your hand in his as the two of you walked down the street, or if he kissed you on the lips in the middle of a crowded restaurant. All the PDA in the world did nothing to assuage the lingering stares, and Spencer felt his sanity chip away with every passing day.

           In the beginning, keeping his relationship with you a secret from your colleagues seemed like a good enough idea. Both of you were in agreement that you didn’t want to your personal relationship to affect your professional one, so when the elevator doors opened up and the two of you stepped out into the bullpen, you both were on your best behavior. And it was okay at first – Spencer was able to put his romantic feelings aside and focus on his work, all while still being able to make eyes at you from across the room. It was the perfect arrangement.

           Until it wasn’t.

           Because it wasn’t enough that you were gorgeous – you were also the most selfless person that Spencer had ever met. Always eager to lend a hand to anyone in need – always seeing the best in everyone, regardless of if they deserve it or not. It was an admirable quality to have, and he loved you for it, but on days like today he wishes you were a little more perceptive.

           That, and he wishes you’d chosen to wear anything but the tight little skirt and low-cut top that you were currently sporting. Not that he didn’t love the way the fabric clung to your figure like it was tailor-made for you – because he did - it was just that every other male in the precinct seemed to enjoy it as much as he did. And that made Spencer’s blood boil.

           The tipping point comes when, just as Spencer is trying to hunt you down and propose a quick lunch break, he finds you engaging in conversation with the very same detective that had been spouting lewd comments about you all morning. You’re seated at the breakroom table, clutching a fresh cup of coffee in hand as you look up at the man, a polite smile upturning your lips as you listen to him drone on about how his amateur baseball team had won some stupid fucking tournament the previous weekend. He’s smiling down at you, endlessly smug and way too pleased with himself at having captured your attention.

           It makes Spencer sick.

           His reprieve comes when your eyes flit to the doorway and you flash him a breathtaking smile. It makes him warm from the inside out, and Spencer wants nothing more than to plant kiss after kiss on your lips. Unfortunately, he can’t, so he settles on returning your smile.

           “There you are,” Spencer greets as he crosses the room before coming to a stop next to you. “I was thinking we could go grab lunch.”

           “Is it really lunch time already?” you murmur as you glance down at your watch. “I guess I let the day get away from me. Detective Yarborough was just telling me about the baseball game his team won this weekend.”

           “Oh, was he now,” Spencer feigns interest as he turns to face the man.

           “Yup,” you say, completely oblivious to the uncomfortable tension. “Didn’t you tell me you played in a baseball game once?”

           This piques the interest of Yarborough and he raises an eyebrow at Spencer.

           “You play?” he asks, tone laden with disbelief.

           “Not exactly.”

           The detective merely harrumphs in response, and an uncomfortable silence falls on the room.

           Your eyes dart between the two men and your brows furrow adorably as you try to make sense of the almost palpable animosity.

           “Okay… So, lunch. Did you have anything in mind, Spence?”

           “There’s a really good pizza joint two blocks from here,” Yarborough chimes in. “I could show you, if you like.”

           He acts as if the offer extends to you both, but the way he looks only at you when he says it tells Spencer otherwise.

           “The hospitality is appreciated, but that won’t be necessary,” Spencer breezes, clipped and to the point. He’s able to see in his peripheral vision the way your eyebrows raise in shock, but he’s too busy glaring at the detective to care.

           “Uh, yeah. Thanks anyways, Detective,” you mutter confusedly as you stand.

           “Anything for a pretty lady such as yourself,” he replies. “And you can call me Trevor.”

           Spencer’s hands are clenched into fists and he has to actually bite down on his tongue to keep from doing something he’d surely regret later. You bid Trevor ado with a smile and a parting wave, and then Spencer’s ushering you out of the room and down the hall, hand placed firmly on your back. He can’t do much in regards to initiating physical contact, but he allows himself this miniscule act of PDA. The feeling of your warmth radiating through your blouse is the only thing keeping him from giving into his primal instincts. Instincts that are screaming at him to put that smarmy bastard in his place.

--

           The hours after lunch pass by rather uneventfully. You accompany Tara when she goes to interview the victim’s family, and for the first-time all-day Spencer is able to repress his frustration long enough to focus on piecing together a geographical profile. By the time you and Tara return, the sun has long since disappeared from the sky and fatigue is rolling off everyone in waves. When Emily finally announces the end of the day, she’s met with absolutely no resistance.

           Spencer immediately scans the room for you, only to frown when he sees that you’re nowhere in sight. In fact, he hasn’t set eyes on you in well over an hour, too busy wrapping up the days’ work to notice your absence until now.

           “Has anyone seen Y/N?” Spencer calls out. His question is met by several shaking heads.

           “I think she’s busy,” JJ sing-songs, eyebrows waggling suggestively. Spencer’s frown only deepens.

           “Busy?”

           JJ nods.

           “Yarborough has been chomping at the bit to ask her to dinner. My guess is he’s got her cornered somewhere.”

           Of fucking course.

           Spencer’s out of his seat and stomping through the precinct in second, oblivious to the way his coworkers exchange curious glances as he storms off.

           He finds the two of you in much the same way as before, only this time Trevor is blocking your path to the doorway, hand in the air as he moves to tuck a stray piece of your hair behind your ear.

           “– C’mon, babe. Say you’ll go to dinner with me,” Trevor croons in a way that’s supposed to come off as seductive. “I’ll make it worth your while.”

           You lean backwards in an attempt to evade his touch, and you barely get the chance to open your mouth when Spencer intervenes.

           “She’s not interested.”

           The detective whips around, snorting in annoyance when he sees Spencer standing in the doorway.

           “What are you, her fucking keeper?” Trevor sneers, before turning back to face you. “Who does this guy think he is?”

           Something in Spencer snaps, then – the same something that has been swelling inside him for months, threatening to spill over every time he had to pretend that the stares didn’t enrage him. He’s tired of pretending, tired of hiding, and so, so fucking tired of not putting assholes like Trevor Yarborough in their place.

           Fueled by months of suppressed anger, Spencer manages to cross the room in about two seconds. He has several inches on the detective, standing at an intimidating six-foot one inch in height, so when he comes to a stop right in front of the detective, he’s looming over him threateningly.

           “I’m her fucking boyfriend, and if you so much as try to touch her again, I’ll break your goddamn hand,” Spencer spits out, and he’d be lying if he said the way Trevor’s eyes widen in fear doesn’t thrill him. “Are we clear?”

           “Uh, yeah. Sorry, dude,” Trevor splutters, raising his hands in surrender. “Didn’t know she was taken. My bad.”

           Spencer tears his eyes away from the detective and takes in the way you’re watching on with an amused expression. He reaches out, and you’re quick to place your hand in his. Without speaking another word to the detective, Spencer leads you from the room and out the back entrance of the precinct.

           “What was that?” you tease, eyes glistening mischievously underneath the street lights. “I thought we agreed that we weren’t taking things public just yet?”

           Spencer crowds you against the brick wall of the building, pressing his body flush against yours. He ducks down swiftly, pulling you into a frenzied kiss. His lips drag against yours relentlessly, and all it takes is one breathy moan before he’s licking into your mouth possessively. Spencer slots his knee in between your legs, simultaneously groping at your chest with one hand as the other tangles in your hair.

           When Spencer pulls away, he doesn’t go far. His lips leave a trail of wet kisses down your neck as you writhe against him, hands clinging tightly to his dress shirt. You whimper when his teeth nip at the tender spot right under your ear, and you can’t help the way your hips cant up when Spencer’s tongue brushes against reddened skin.

           “I’m tired of pretending,” Spencer murmurs as his mouth continues to move against you, sucking purple bruises against your flesh. “Don’t fucking care about how it will affect the job. Tomorrow, everyone’s gonna know that you’re mine. Gonna mark every inch of you tonight – gonna fuck you until you can’t fucking walk.”

           “Please,” you slur as you guide Spencer’s hand down until his fingers graze the end of your skirt. Spencer chuckles darkly against your neck when his hand brushes against the soiled lace of your panties.

           “Didn’t mean I’d fuck you right here,” he laughs, prompting you to let out an impatient whine. The hand that was previously tangled in your hair slides down until it’s wrapped around your throat, and Spencer’s cock twitches eagerly in his pants when you push your throat harder into his palm. “Such a needy little slut for me. Ready and willing for me to fuck you out in the open, where anyone could walk by and see how fucking desperate you are for my cock.”

           “M’ your slut,” you pant as Spencer’s middle and index fingers ghost across your center. “Only yours, Spence. I don’t care who sees, just - please fuck me!”

           “I fucking own you,” Spencer growls against your lips as he tightens his hold on your throat. “And as much as I’d love to take you right against this wall, the things I have planned for you would elicit quite an audience. I know how loud you like to be.”

           Spencer pushes your panties to the side and you let out a low hiss as he drags a finger across where want him most. You cry out in frustration when he removes his hand to bring it up to his mouth, tongue darting out to lick his finger clean.

           “Just needed a little taste to tide me over,” Spencer murmurs, smirking devilishly at you as he steps back from you. “Let’s head back to the hotel. I’ve got lots I wanna do to you, pretty girl.”

--

           As soon as the door to the hotel room clicks shut, clothes are flying off as the two of you make your way to the bed. It’s a mad dash as you both undress, and as soon as the last garment leaves your body, Spencer pounces on you. Your lips meet in a passionate kiss, and the way you immediately go pliant as Spencer’s mouth works against yours makes him hum appreciatively.

           “Don’t feel like being nice tonight. Are you gonna let me use that pretty little pussy however I want?” Spencer inquires, though he already knows the answer. He’s known how tonight would pan out ever since the first roll of your hips against his back at the police station.

           You nod fervently, hopelessly, and Spencer moves his hand up to grip your chin in his hand. The pad of his thumb traces over the swollen skin of your kiss bruised lips.

           “What about this?” he asks, tapping lightly against your lip. “Are you gonna let me fuck this slutty little mouth of yours?” Spencer slips his thumb into your mouth and you immediately close your lips around the digit, suckling lightly. Your eyes never leave his.

           “You’d do anything I asked you to, wouldn’t you, pet?” Spencer muses, pressing his thumb farther into your mouth until you gag around him. Spencer withdraws his thumb and his hand tugs hard on the hair at the back of your scalp. “Open.”

           You oblige immediately, and Spencer spits into your waiting mouth. You swallow without being instructed, and the visual of it makes Spencer let out a low groan.

           “Get on your knees,” Spencer barks out, and the way you scramble to follow his order makes him let out a chuckle. “So eager to have my cock in your mouth,” he hums as he taps his dick teasingly against your cheek. You open your mouth wide for him, and Spencer guides your mouth down onto his dick at a tantalizingly slow pace. You let out a moan as you hollow your cheeks around his head, tongue lapping greedily at the precum that gathered there before Spencer makes you take him deeper.

           “Everyone thinks you’re such an innocent little thing, but here you are, letting me use you like a cheap whore while you enjoy every minute of it,” Spencer says through gritted teeth as you moan wantonly around his cock. It isn’t until he’s halfway down your throat that your eyes begin to water, mascara running down your cheeks as he fucks into your mouth.

           Spencer lets out a choked sound when your nose brushes against the skin of his abdomen, and he has to fight the urge to throw his head back in pleasure. He doesn’t want to look away, not even for a moment. Not when you’re looking up at him like that, tears running down your face as you swallow around his length.

           He pulls you off him just the tiniest bit before he’s forcing you back down, a string of curses falling from his lips as your head bobs up and down.

           “You take my cock so well, pretty girl,” Spencer praises, prompting you to let out a muffled moan around him. The vibrations send a shock of pleasure through him and he can help the way his hips stutter. “Fuck, baby. You like it when I tell you what a perfect little whore you are, don’t you?”

           You’re unable to answer, because Spencer presses down on the back of your head until you’ve taken all of him again. The pressure he puts on you doesn’t relent, not even when you gag around him.

           “Fucking choke on it, slut,” Spencer grunts. “Don’t act like you don’t want this. You were just begging me to fuck you in an alley not twenty minutes ago, like some pathetic fucking tramp. You wanna act like a tramp, I’m gonna treat you like one.”

           Spencer’s lips curl into a debauched grin when your hands come up and grip the backs of his thighs, pulling him closer and further down your throat.

           “That’s what I fucking thought,” Spencer moans, giving several more harsh thrusts before pulling you off of him completely. Spencer reaches down to wipe at the spit that coats your lips as you look up at him with a shy smile.

           “You okay, pretty girl?” Spencer asks as he caresses the side of your face.

           “Mm,” you hum, nuzzling your face against his palm. “Keep going, please. Don’t hold back.”

           “God, I fucking love you,” Spencer sighs happily. “Get on the bed.”

           By the time Spencer fishes a tie out of his suitcase, you’re sprawled out across the bed, head resting against the pillows with your legs spread wide. Your teeth are nestled against your bottom lip as you watch him stalk towards you, eyes running up and down his naked figure appreciatively.

           Spencer crawls onto the bed until he’s settled in between your legs. You present your wrists to him, just like you’ve done a million times before, and Spencer feels that familiar thrum of excitement rush through his body. He fucking lives for moments like these – moments where all his problems melt away to nothing. Moments where he has no other thought than wrecking you, thoroughly and completely.

           Once your wrists are bound you hold them above you, and Spencer sits back on his heels, eyes raking up and down every inch of you.

           “M’ so fucking lucky to be the only one who gets to see you like this.”

           Spencer pinches your right nipple in between his fingers and you let out a squeak, hips bucking up, desperate for some friction. He kneads your breast in his hand as he lowers his mouth to the other one, tongue laving around you. A light nip from his teeth is all that it takes for you to cry out, eyelids fluttering closed.

           “Spence, please. Need you to touch me now, pl-”

           Spencer’s hand connecting with your cheek stops you from finishing your sentence.

           “Do not tell me what to do,” Spencer seethes, once again gripping your chin to keep you from looking away. “Ungrateful slut. I should just leave you here, fucking dripping and desperate for a release that you won’t get. Maybe then you’d learn to take what’s given to you.”

           “Please, no! I’ll be good, I swear. I’m sorry!”

           Spencer narrows his eyes at you, contemplative.

           “Open.”

           You do as he says, and without another word Spencer inserts two fingers into your mouth, pressing down hard on your tongue.

           “Get them nice and wet, and maybe I’ll think about using them on you.”

           You do as he tells you, and by the time Spencer removes his fingers from your mouth, you’re trembling underneath him from anticipation.

           “D-Did I do good?” you stutter out, batting your lashes at him as you squirm under his gaze.

           “So good, baby. I think you’ve earned my fingers,” Spencer hums. “Need you to be still, okay? You’re not gonna like what happens if you try to move.”

           You nod enthusiastically, eyes fluttering shut when his fingers brush across your clit. Spencer spends ample time rubbing deliciously slow circles over your sensitive bundle of nerves, relishing in every gasp and whimper that falls from your lips. Lips that he’d very much like to kiss, so he does, and you’re more than happy to reciprocate. Spencer lets out a happy sigh into your mouth.

           You get lost in the kiss, so lost in the way that Spencer licks into your mouth that it catches you completely off guard when he slides two fingers into you.

           “Oh, God,” you moan when Spencer curls his fingers against your walls, fucking them in and out of you, slow and unrelenting.

           “S’that feel good, princess?” Spencer asks, a teasing lilt to his voice. “Tell me how it feels.”

           Your head falls back against the pillows as you struggle to keep your hips firmly placed on the mattress.

           “Feels amazing, Spence. Always feels so good with you. Never want anyone else, only you.”

           And fuck, if that sentiment doesn’t shoot straight to his heart - amongst other places. Spencer places a tender kiss to your cheek before he’s moving down to your neck and sucking a bruise right under your jaw.

           “Yeah?” Spencer prompts. “Not even that stupid fucking detective? I’m sure he’d love a chance to see you like this.”

           “So, you were jealous,” you chuckle between moans, and Spencer bites down hard where your neck meets your shoulder.

           “F-Fuck, Spencer!”

           “Should I be jealous?” Spencer speeds up the onslaught of his fingers, scissoring them at such an unforgiving pace that you can’t help but roll your hips against them.

           You regret this instantly, because Spencer’s fingers immediately pull out of you, leaving you empty and cold. Spencer tuts, shaking his head disappointedly.

           “Dumb little whore can’t even sit still long enough to cum on my fingers.”

           “Please, let me try again. I’ll do better, I promise!”

           Spencer shakes his head and scoots up until his back is rested against the pillows.

           “C’mere,” he commands. “Lay across my lap. Or can you not follow simple commands?”

           “I-I can,” you whisper as you crawl across him, splaying out so that you rest on your elbows with your ass in the air.

           Spencer grabs a handful of your ass and kneads it in his hands.

           “How many do you think you deserve?”

           You blush and smile shyly at him from over your shoulder.

           “However many you want to give me. I can take it.”

           Spencer returns your smile.

           “Good answer. I think you can handle fifteen. How does that sound?”

           “Sounds perfect. T-Thank you, Spencer,” you mumble, cheeks burning red. Spencer continues to caress the tender skin of your bare ass, admiring the way the skin is completely blank; the perfect canvas.

           You let out a whimper when his hand comes down hard on your ass before kneading the sensitive, reddening skin.

           “T-Thank you,” you gasp out, and Spencer is quick to follow up with another strike against the opposite cheek.

           It goes on like this until it’s time for the fifteenth strike, and by then you’ve devolved into garbled whines, ass bright red and marked up with the imprint of Spencer’s hands. His dick is painfully hard underneath you, and you’re in a similar state – arousal dripping onto Spencer’s thigh, coating it.

           “Last one, baby. Do you think you can handle it?”

          “Y-Yes,” you choke out. “Please, I need it. Hurt me, please.”

           The desperation in your voice does things to him, makes him practically feral with the need to fucking tear you apart, and Spencer is quick to deliver the final blow. You barely even have it in you to cry out anymore – a feeble sob is all that falls from your lips.

          Spencer’s hand ghosts down across your bruised skin until his fingertips trace over where you drip for him.

          “You like it when I punish you, don’t you, dirty girl?” Spencer hums as his fingers glide over your soaked folds. 

          “Y-Yes,” you mewl, shifting so that your cunt grinds back onto his hand. Spencer indulges you - allows you to rock your hips against his palm as he watches on in awe, soaking up every desperate sound that tumbles past your lips. 

          Spencer pulls his hand away after a moment and you keen in protest.

           “Can you sit up for me, sweet girl?” Spencer asks, and you nod, because of course you do – you’d do anything if you thought it’d please him. You struggle to pull yourself up with shaky limbs, and Spencer puts a hand on your lower back to steady you. “Can you straddle my leg? Yeah, just like that.” Spencer pulls you down and places a slow kiss to your lips, one hand coming up to wipe away the tears gliding down your face. After a moment of slow, sweet kisses are shared, Spencer unties your wrists.

           “I want you to ride my thigh – can you do that, princess?”

           You whimper as you lower yourself down onto his leg, eyes fluttering shut as you begin to rock against the hardened muscle of his leg.

           Spencer continues placing kisses on your lips, your face, your neck – worshipping every inch of skin he can reach with his mouth, all while whispering praises against you.

           “So perfect for me. Prettiest girl I’ve ever seen,” he murmurs as he grips your hips with steady hands, urging you to increase the speed of your hips. “Can’t wait to have that perfect pussy wrapped around my cock. Always so tight, yet you take it so well every time.”

           “S-Spence, m’ close,” you slur, hands clinging desperately to his shoulders.

           “Already? You usually last a bit longer than that, baby.”

           “P-Please, Spencer, I can’t-” you whimper, tears once again pricking at the corners of your eyes at the thought of having to wait a second longer.

           “Shh, baby. It’s okay, you can cum,” Spencer reassures you, and your shoulders visibly untense. “Cum for me, pretty girl.”

           It takes two more rolls of your hips for you to cum on Spencer’s thigh with a cry of his name. Spencer rubs soothing circles into your hips as you ride out your high, murmuring broken thank yous as you come down.

           Finally, you still, and your eyes open, pupils so dilated that your eyes look almost black in the dim light of the hotel room.

          “You okay, princess?”

           You give a weak nod.

           “M’great,” you smile, sounding as fucked out as he’s ever heard you. You lean down and slot your mouth against his, and the kiss is slow and languid – soft and unhurried.

            Spencer is the first to pull away.

           “Need you to get on all fours for me,” he instructs. “Don’t think you need to put any pressure on that pretty little ass of yours right now.”

           You giggle at that, before crawling off of Spencer’s lap. You assume the position, and Spencer places a pillow underneath your hips before trailing a line of kisses down your spine. By the time he reaches your ass, you’re writing against him, wiggling your hips eagerly. Spencer places a kiss to both of your bruised cheeks before pulling away.

           You let out a startled oh! when Spencer licks up your center, parting you with his fingers before fucking in and out of you with his tongue.

           “S-Spence, oh my God, yes!” you cry out, hands fisting in the sheets as he continues to work his mouth against your core.

           “Love your fucking pussy so much,” Spencer sighs against you, lapping at your clit hungrily. “Could fucking lick you out for hours. You taste so perfect, Y/N.”

            Spencer lets out a filthy groan against you, and that’s all it takes for you to fall over the edge, wrecked moans filling the otherwise silent hotel room. This orgasm hits you both quicker and harder than the first, and he can’t help but smile against you as you rock back against his face, desperate to prolong the sensation. Spencer continues to work you through your orgasm, stopping only when you cease to twitch underneath him.

           “Such a good girl for me. Think you can handle one more?”

            You raise up just enough that you can look at him from over your shoulder.

           “Yes, please,” you beg, voice scratchy and raw. “Please, fuck me.”

           “Yes, ma’am,” Spencer chuckles. “Do you think you can lay on your back? I wanna see that pretty face when I make you cum on my cock.”

           You answer by rolling over, wincing slightly when your ass comes in contact with the sheets. You look up at Spencer with wide, doe eyes. You have mascara smeared all down your cheeks and your lips are swollen, and to top it all off, deep, purple love bites are dusted across the entire expanse of your neck and chest. Spencer had set out to mark you as his – so that no one would be able to deny that you belonged to him – and he’d done a spectacular job, if he said so himself.

           “God, you’re so fucking pretty.”

           “Then come fuck me already,” you challenge, looking sated in every possible way – yet still, your eyes hold the same hunger that he’s sure is reflected in his own eyes.

           Spencer leans down and traps your lips in a bruising kiss, and without warning he thrusts in you to the hilt. You cry out into the kiss, startled by the sudden intrusion, but Spencer sets a brutal pace that leaves you no time to recover.

           “You said you wanted me to fuck you,” he growls against your lips. “Now fucking take it.”

           He’s fucking into you so hard that you can’t even manage a reply – you just tighten your legs around his waist and drag your nails across the expanse of his back, no doubt leaving bright red marks in your wake. Spencer can feel his own release fast approaching – honestly, he’s been close ever since the first drag of his tongue against your pussy. And now that he’s finally enveloped into your tight, wet heat, that all too familiar feeling in the pit of his stomach is threatening to consume him.

           Spencer’s hand descends from its place next to your head down to your clit, and your whole body jolts with the first swipe of his thumb. You clench around him as a litany of particularly filthy utterances escapes you, and Spencer’s hips stutter.

           “Fuck, princess,” he groans, head coming to rest on your shoulder as he struggles to regain his rhythm. “You don’t even know what you do to me. You’ve ruined me for anyone else. Never fucking want to lose you. Love you so much.”

           “I love you, I love you, I love you,” you chant into his ear, sounding like some kind of siren, luring him straight to his inevitable ruination. “I’m so close, Spence. Cum with me, please? I want to feel you. Please, baby.”

           “Y-Yeah, fuck,” Spencer chokes out. “Say my name when you cum, princess. Want everyone to know how good I fuck you.”

           And when you cum with a shout of his name, walls pulsating deliciously around his cock, Spencer is quick to join you. He continues to roll his hips against yours as you both ride it out, whispers of almost intelligible affirmations being shared between slow, loving kisses.

           After a moment of post-orgasm bliss, Spencer leaves and returns with a bottle of cocoa butter lotion and a warm, wet rag. You watch on with heavy lidded eyes as he cleans you up, and for a moment, he thinks you’ve fallen asleep. It’s not until he finishes slathering your reddened backside with lotion that you speak again.

           “You shouldn’t be jealous, by the way,” you murmur as he lays down beside you. “You’re it for me, Spencer Reid. I don’t ever want you to doubt that I’m anything less than crazy about you.”

           It’s everything that Spencer’s ever wanted to hear, and just like that, every fear – every insecurity that had plagued him in the past several months – fell away to nothing. Suddenly, he couldn’t remember why he’d ever been worried in the first place.

           “You’re it for me, too,” Spencer whispers as he pulls you until his arms and presses a soft kiss to the top of your head.

           “We’re going to have a lot of explaining to do tomorrow, you know,” you remark as you nuzzle into Spencer’s side.

           “Don’t care,” he sighs happily. “I’ll shout it from the roof tops if I have to. I want everyone to know you’re my girl.”

           “You’re a sap, Doctor Reid.”

           “Only for you.”

           A moment of blissful silence passes, before the sound of your growling stomach sets you both into a fit of giggles.

           “We never did get dinner, did we?” Spencer muses as he lightly runs his fingernails across your scalp. You hum appreciatively and a pleased shiver rolls through you.

           “Nope. You were a little too preoccupied with marking your territory to even offer to feed me,” you tease as you run your fingertips down the planes of his chest.

           “Well, now that that’s been taken care of - could I interest you in some takeout?”

          “Possibly,” you sigh, flattening your palm on his chest, right over his heart. “Do you think that pizza place Trevor mentioned delivers?”

          “I’m going to pretend you didn’t say that.”

          “Is that a no?”

          “... Look up the number.”

-

-

-

taglist: @90spumkin​ @moon-light-jukebox​ @thebookamongmen​ @pinkdiamond1016​ @itsametaphorbriansblog​ @eldahae​

[pajarx]

THIS POST WAS ON MY DRAFTS BUT IT STILL STANDS Turning replies back on was tumblrs worst error, imma have to turn off replies from strangers because people are not brave enough to post on their blogs what they wanna say n just leave me seeing it

[bxcketbarnes]

Place in Me

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Words: 6700+

Author's Note: So, this fic is extremely long. I apologize in advance. I also hope you guys enjoy it. I'm worried that it's not up to par but we'll see I guess 🥺🥰 It's loosely based on the song Place in Me by Luke Hemmings. Beautiful song. Uhm, slight enemies to lovers which is unusual for me. Let me know what you though!! xox

"Barnes and L/N, you'll be partnering up," Tony states, and your eyes widen a bit before glancing towards the ex-assassin.

You notice Bucky rolling his eyes while crossing his arms over his chest, leaning back in the chair he's sitting in. "Is that the best plan, Tony? We've never worked together," he questions the man.

"That's the whole point, Manchurian Candidate," Tony mumbles while wagging his finger between the two of you. "You two are the only ones who haven't been on a mission together, so."

You stay quiet as the older man sets the debriefing folder in front of you. Your eyes meet his and you notice a certain emotion swimming in Tony's eyes. He raises his eyebrows slightly and you nod your head.

"You two look those over and then get to the quinjet. It leaves in an hour and your asses better be on it," Tony mentions while walking away from the two of you.

Silence fills the room and you avoid looking at Bucky. Your heart pounds in your chest as a sigh leaves the man's lips. You instinctively lift your gaze towards him, seeing his blue eyes already on you.

Your breath hitches in your throat and you look away, clearing your throat. "So, uh, s-sorry you have to work with me," you mumble loud enough for him to hear.

Bucky tsks before standing up from his chair. Your chest clenches when he doesn't say anything to you, watching the super-soldier walk out of the room. A heavy sigh leaves your lips, glancing down at the files in front of you.

"He'll come around," Steve's voice fills the room and you jump slightly, turning in your chair to see the blonde leaning against the doorframe.

You shake your head at his words, tears pooling in your eyes. "I don't think he will, Steve. H-He'll talk to everyone else except for me? I… I don't even know what I did for him to hate me so much," you sigh, your fingers catching the tears that roll down your cheeks.

Steve walks further into the room and lays a hand on your shoulder. You chew on your bottom lip, breathing heavily through your nose to calm yourself. "He's jus- He's got a funny way of showing people he cares. I doubt he hates you, Y/N," the blonde reassures you, giving you a gentle squeeze.

"Coulda fooled me," you mumble before shrugging his hand off of you, standing up from your seat. "I have to go get ready."

You hold the files to your chest and walk out of the debriefing room, making your way to your quarters. Your lip trembles a bit as you continue to think about Bucky and his cold behavior towards you.

Once you're in the elevator, you let out a shaky breath before glancing at the ceiling. Tears continuously glide down your reddened cheeks and you try to shake the memories from your head.

"Let's just get this over with," you sigh to yourself as the doors open up. You pack all the essentials you'll need for the mission,  double-checking that you've got everything before making your way to the quinjet.

You notice Tony standing at the end of the ramp as Bucky walks into the jet, a bag hanging off of his shoulder. "If you truly need to get away from Barnes, let me know okay?" Tony mumbles and you give him a tight-lipped smile, nodding your head in response.

"I should be okay, Tony. Thank you though," you whisper to him before walking onto the ramp of the quinjet.

"You guys got this. I believe in you," Tony reassures the two of you and the ramp proceeds to shut.

You sit as far away from Bucky as you can, fiddling with your fingers for a few minutes before pulling out your headphones. You rest your head against the headrest and decide to rest your eyes.

Bucky looks over at you and wishes that you weren't coming along. In his mind, this mission is way too dangerous for you. You're not a super soldier like him or Steve. You don't have a suit of armor like Tony or Rhodes. You don't have powers like Wanda.

You got your training from Natasha, and sure, Natasha has incredible skills that she learned from the Red Room. But, you're still human. A sigh leaves his lips and tears his gaze from you, deciding to make sure you don't get hurt at all.

-

"Holy shit," you mumble in amazement, looking around the hotel suite that Tony booked for the two of you.

Bucky walks in behind you, not saying anything as he brushes past you. You bite your cheek, your eyes following his figure as the super-soldier makes his way towards the bedroom.

You let out a slight huff of breath, running a hand through your hair. "I thought Tony mentioned there being two beds?" Bucky asks and your eyebrows furrow.

"That's what he said," you mumble while heading towards where he is. "Is there only on-"

"One bed? Yeah," Bucky cuts you off and you gulp, taking a peek into the bedroom to see one bed in the middle of it.

"I-Great," you whisper as the brunette lets out a heavy sigh. "Sorry, Bucky, I didn't-"

Bucky grunts before making his way towards the living area. "I'll take the couch," he states and you slowly close your mouth, the words dying on your lips.

"O-Okay," you whisper loud enough for him to hear, walking into the room you'll be staying in.

You press your lips together before shutting the door, putting some space between you and Bucky. I should've backed out immediately. You think to yourself while setting your bag onto the edge of the bed.

After unpacking your bag, you organize your things so they're easily accessible. You open the file Tony gave you, looking over the schedule of your target. "Aha!" You softly whisper, pointing at the paper while reading how your target generally goes to the restaurant right about now. "I could eat."

You open the bedroom door and step out of the room, looking around for your six-foot-tall co-worker. You furrow your brows at the space, wondering if he's still here or actually left. He'd tell me if he left… right?

Bucky,

I left to go get some food and a little intel on our target. Schedule says he's in the restaurant around this time. See you later.

Y/N

You place the written note near his things so he'll see it before grabbing one of the hotel room keys. You exit the room and make your way to the elevator before pushing the button. The doors open immediately and you step inside, pushing the button to the lobby.

"Hold the door!" A voice shouts and you stick your hand out, stopping the door from closing. "Oh, thank you so much."

"You're welc-" you cut yourself off as you look up at the man, your heart dropping into your stomach.

The man standing in front of you is Gabriel Price, the target you're currently after. The doors to the elevator close once more as the air around you grows thick. "You okay?" He asks and you snap your head up, your eyes meeting his cold ones.

"Y-Yes, sorry. I was… I was stunned by your beauty," you laugh nervously and the man smirks while fixing his tie.

A chuckle leaves Gabriel's lips and he looks down at you. "Well, thank you, darling. You're a sight for sore eyes, yourself," he winks and you bite your lip.

"I-Thank you, sir," you blush, wishing that the elevator would open right about now.

"Please, call me Gabriel," he corrects you before sticking his hand out.

Your eyes glance from his face to his hand before shaking it. "Nice to meet you, Gabriel. I'm Sylvie," you come up with a fake name.

The doors to the elevator open up and you drop his hand before leaving the small space. "I hope to see you around, Sylvie," he grins before walking into the restaurant.

You can feel your hands shake a bit and you let out a deep breath before fishing your phone out of your pocket. You dial Bucky's number, pressing the device to your ear.

"Pick up, please," you beg, your eyes looking around the place to see if the super-soldier is nearby.

When your call goes to voice-mail, you roll your eyes, not even deciding to leave him a message. You slide your phone into your pocket before heading into the restaurant. You notice Gabriel sitting with three other guys at a table near the corner as you walk over to the bar area.

"Hey, can I get some food to go?" You ask the bartender and the woman nods her head before grabbing her pen.

"Of course, sweetie. What can I get ya?" She asks with a smile.

Your eyes roam over the menu and decide to get something small for you and Bucky. "Uhm, can I get the fish and chips and a bacon cheeseburger with fries," you tell her and you watch the woman write it down.

"Absolutely. Do you want to bill that to your room?" She questions and you nod your head in reply, telling her the room you're in. "I'll put it in for you. Should be ready in about fifteen minutes."

"Perfect thank you so much," you smile as she turns to head towards the kitchen.

-

After stealthily watching Gabriel while waiting for your food, you finally make it back to your room. You balance the to-go boxes against one hand while grabbing the room key with the other, unlocking your door.

"Bucky?" You call out after shutting the door with your foot, taking a glance around the room in front of you.

"Yeah?" He mumbles and pokes his head around the corner of the wall, noticing the styrofoam boxes in your hands. "What's that?"

You furrow your brows and quickly wet your lips. "Did you not get my note?" You wonder and Bucky shakes his head. A sigh leaves your lips and you mutter to yourself, "figures."

Bucky picks the note you wrote from the table in front of him as you set the food onto the counter in the kitchenette. "Wait, was he there? The target?" The super soldier asks while walking towards you.

"Yup," you mention and hand the man his food, not meeting his gaze. "Actually met him in the elevator, but you would've known that if you answered your phone."

You brush past him, your shoulder bumping into his as you head towards your room. You stop just before entering the space before turning to face him, feeling the anger flow through your veins. "You know… next time you should just ask for a new partner if you don't want to work with me. No need to be a fucking coward and ignore me. That's how people get hurt, Bucky."

His blue eyes glance towards you just as you slam the bedroom door shut, leaving Bucky to his own devices. The brunette opens the take-out container, seeing a cheeseburger and fries sitting in it.

Bucky's phone rings loudly, snapping him from his thoughts and he pushes himself off of the counter before grabbing the phone.

"Hey, Steve," he answers after checking who it is, pressing the device to his ear.

"Buck," the blonde greets, and Bucky can hear Sam yelling in the background. "How’re things going?"

A sigh leaves Bucky's lips and he scratches the back of his neck. "Uhm, alright, I guess. It's been pretty tense between Y/N and I," he informs his best friend while eating a couple of fries.

"Well, have you tried having a conversation with her?" Steve asks and Bucky furrows his brows.

"I- No?"

"You know, after you left her alone in the debriefing room I stopped by," Steve starts as Bucky sits down on one of the chairs, continuing to eat his food, "and she told me that she's got no clue as to why you hate her so much. So, Buck, what's the reason?"

The super soldier feels his stomach twist a bit, not knowing that's how you felt about his coldness towards you. "I… I'm not sure, Steve. I just- she- I don't know how to explain it," Bucky mumbles and runs his fingers through his hair.

"Figure it out then. You two need to be working together. The hostility between the two of you is going to get one of you hurt… or even killed," Steve reprimands the super soldier and Bucky finds himself nodding in response. "I have to go. Talk to you later."

Bucky sets his phone down on the table before glancing towards your bedroom door. He lets out a deep breath through his nose and continues to eat the food you got him.

You sit against the headboard with your knees tucked a bit, staring off into space. You look towards the alarm clock to see it's just past midnight and you press your lips together before leaning your chin on your knees. Your food grows cold as it sits on the nightstand, your appetite is forgotten after your altercation with Bucky.

Tears pool in your eyes as you run your fingers through your hair. "Why? Why? God, why?!" You cry to yourself and before you know it you chuck your phone across the room.

You hear the device smash as it collides with the wall and you see the screen all cracked. A sigh leaves your lips as you watch the lit-up screen turn black before cursing to yourself.

Bucky quickly sits up at the thumping sound echoing off of the walls, his blue eyes looking around the dark space. His eyebrows furrow as everything is in place and the super-soldier gets up from his spot on the couch.

A frown etched onto his lips when he walks closer to the bedroom door, hearing your cries coming from inside it. Bucky wets his lip and feels his chest clench a bit before he raises his fist to knock on your door.

"Fucking hell," he heard you mutter through the door and Bucky lowers his hand, deciding it’s best to leave you be so he doesn't make it worse.

He swallows the lump forming in his throat before making his way back towards the couch. Bucky lays down under the covers and stares up at the ceiling, a deep sigh escaping his lips.

"Steve's right," he whispers to himself, "I have to fix this."

-

You put your hood up as you follow Gabriel's men down the busy street. You stay a good distance behind them as you can lightly hear their conversation.

Apologies leave your lips as you're weaving through the sea of people, bumping into some of their shoulders as you pass by them. You wince when a burly man bumps into you, your eyes gazing up at the man while pressing your hand to your side.

"Sorry, miss," he smirks and you furrow your brows, mumbling that it's alright.

You stumble around the corner as the pain in your side spreads, removing your hand from the wound to see blood staining your skin. "Shit," you mumble and glance back to see if you can find the man that bumped into you.

Suddenly, your mouth gets covered by someone and you let out a scream as they drag you into the ally beside you. They throw you on the ground before another starts to kick your stomach.

"Don't fuck with us," a man growls and grabs a fist full of your hair, lifting you before shoving you against the brick wall.

Heavy pants leave your lips as the man's fist connects with your face. Pain fills your body as you double over, a couple of gaps leaving your lips.

"P-Please," you beg as another man takes a swing at you, blood dripping from your lips.

Your head gets pushed back against the wall as the older gentleman leans close to you. "Should've thought about that before following us, sweetheart," he snickers before gripping your cheeks. "I'm sure someone will find you."

You don't get a chance to say anything before the man smashes your head against the building. Your eyes roll back into your head as you get punched once more. The man lets go of your body and you drop to the ground as you become unconscious from the beating.

"We'll find her later, let's go."

Bucky knocks on your door in the hotel room, eyebrows furrowed as he hasn't heard from you all day. "Y/N?" He calls out your name before opening the door, peeking his head into the room. He walks into the room and sees the place empty. "Shit."

He pulls his phone from his pocket and dials your number. Bucky presses the device to his ear before walking back out into the main room. C'mon, c'mon. He thinks to himself while pacing in front of the couch.

A sigh leaves his lips when the call goes to voice-mail, his vibranium hand rubbing through his hair. The next number he dials is Steve's, deciding to tell the blonde what happened.

"Hey, Buck, what's going on?" Steve answers the phone.

"Y/N's missing," Bucky states, feeling his body start to panic at the thought of what could've happened. "I-She was here in the middle of the night and she hasn't left her room all day, so when I went to go check, the room was empty."

The brunette sits down on the edge of the couch, leaning his elbow on his knees. "Okay calm down. Did you try calling her?" Steve asks and Bucky scoffs.

"Of course I tried calling her, Steve. I'm not a complete idiot," Bucky mumbles.

"Goddamnit, Bucky. None of us can head out there right now. So, you need to get out there and find her," Steve informs him and Bucky nods his head in response, standing up from the couch.

Bucky goes to speak when the door to the room opens and you stumble inside. "She's here. I-I gotta go," the super-soldier breathes, hanging up before Steve could say anything.

You wince while shutting the door, leaning on it for stability. "Bucky," you whimper as he rushes over to you. You fall into his arms, your hands gripping his shirt tightly.

"Hey, hey, what happened?" He mumbles softly while leaning down to pick you up bridal style.

Bucky gently kicks the bedroom door open before walking into the room, setting you down onto the bed. His eyes roam across your body, seeing the bruises and cuts on your face. The brunette notices dried blood on your hand and his brows furrowed in confusion.

"Fuck," Bucky whispers after seeing blood on your shirt. He picks up your shirt to see a wound in your side, his fingers grazing over your skin.

He walks into the living space, grabbing everything he'll need to patch up your wound. Bucky feels his phone vibrating in his pocket as he wipes the alcoholic pad across your skin.

"Hey, Steve," the super-soldier answers his phone, putting it on speaker before setting it on the table beside him.

"She okay?" He asks immediately and Bucky swallows thickly.

"Uhm, not exactly. She looks like she got the shit beat out of her, and she got stabbed," he informs the blonde.

Bucky runs a hand over his face after patching up your stab wound, turning his attention to your face. "Shit, Bucky. Okay, I'll let Tony know and tell you what he says," Steve mumbles and Bucky nods his head in response.

The phone hangs up and Bucky shuffles towards your upper body, grabbing another alcohol wipe. "God, I'm so sorry, Y/N," he sighs while wiping the dried blood off of your face. "I'm gonna need you to pull through this, alright. I need you."

Bucky throws the bloodied wipes away before gently stroking your cheek. He pushes himself off of the floor and grabs a glass of water and some painkillers, setting them on the table beside your bed.

His fingers glide across your forehead, pushing some of your hair out of your face. "Please come back to me."

-

A groan leaves your lips as your eyes flutter open. Your vision clears and you see Bucky sleeping beside your bed, his arms crossed over his chest. A small smile comes to your lips as you attempt to sit up a bit, wincing slightly.

Bucky jumps awake at the sound of you, his blue eyes meeting yours. "Y/N, hey," he whispers, pulling the chair closer to you. "How do you feel?"

"Like I've been hit with a truck," you chuckle while holding your side.

"Here," he mumbles and moves to grab the pills and water beside you, "take these." You mumble a quiet thank you before taking the medicine from him.

You notice his nervous behavior as Bucky sits back down in his chair. "Bucky, I'm fine," you tell him after swallowing the liquid, setting the glass down. "Nothing I haven't handled before."

A sigh leaves the brunette's lips and Bucky runs his fingers through his hair. "It doesn't matter if you've handled it before, Y/N. You went out- on your own- to follow a dangerous man and you could've been killed!" He exclaims with a huff of breath.

"Well, if you were capable of working with me, Bucky, then I wouldn't have to do it alone! Don't you see that I'm trying?! I'm trying so hard to be civil with you, but you don't budge. Probably would've been better if I died. Then I wouldn't have to subject myself to your coldness every fucking day," you practically scream, your chest heaving rapidly.

Bucky's eyes soften at your words, his heart hurting a bit when you said you'd rather be dead than deal with him. "I'm sorry," he whispers loud enough for you to hear and your head turns to look at him.

"You're sorry? For treating me as an outsider for over a year?"

"I… Look, Y/N, I don't have a good reason for my behavior. I wish I did, I really do, but can we start over?" Bucky stutters and hesitantly grabs your hand.

Your heart flutters in your chest as his flesh hand grabs yours, seeing the sincerity in his blue eyes. "Can you stay with me?" You mumble, your fingers interlacing with his.

Bucky smiles softly and nods his head. You smile at him, feeling him squeeze your hand. The sound of your hotel room door opening catches Bucky's attention and the super-soldier suddenly gets up from his chair.

"Buc-"

He covers your mouth with his hand while bringing a finger to his lips, silently telling you to stay quiet. Your eyes widen as talking from the other room finally hits your ears.

"Stay there," Bucky mouths to you and you nod your head, your hands gripping the covers.

Bucky stealthily walks towards the bedroom door, pressing his ear to the wooden structure. "The tracking device says she's here," a man states and Bucky furrows his brows. Tracking device? "Check the bedroom."

Footsteps grow louder and Bucky quickly makes his way back towards you before lifting you off of the bed. Your arms wrap around his neck as the brunette quietly hides the two of you in the closet.

Your fingers stroke the back of his neck soothingly, keeping your gaze on his face the whole time. You notice his jaw clenching as Bucky focuses on the sounds around you.

"She's not here. She must've found it and left it behind," a different voice proclaims, another agreeing with the statement. "Let's go. We'll let Gabriel know."

You swallow thickly as Bucky's eyes meet yours. You can feel his breath fan your face, realizing the distance between the two of you is closer than you thought.

"Is it clear?" You whisper and Bucky gently sets you onto your feet.

"Hold on, let me check," he mumbles while his hands grip your waist, making sure you're steady before releasing you. "You good?"

You nod your head in response and Bucky's hands slip off of your waist before slowly walking out of the closet. You run a hand through your hair as you wait for the super soldier to come back.

"It's clear, c'mon," Bucky tells you and holds his hand out for you to take.

You wince a bit while walking out of the closet, grabbing ahold of Bucky's hand as he leads you back towards the bed. "Did he say something about a tracking device?" You ask him and Bucky nods his head in reply.

You lower yourself onto the bed and think about the event of yesterday. Bucky's eyes meet yours, watching your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "Can you think of when they might've placed a tracker on you?" He asks while crouching in front of you, resting his hands against your thighs.

"I…" a short gasp leaves your lips as you remember a guy smirking at you after stabbing your side. "No way…"

"What?"

You pull your shirt over your head and Bucky's eyes widen before looking away. "My stab wound," you whisper.

Bucky snaps his attention to you as you take the bandage off of your side, exposing the wound. "Shit," he mumbles and lifts himself off of the floor. "If you can grab a towel and lay on it. We have to get it out."

You nod your head as he leaves the room. Another wince leaves your lips as you walk into the bathroom, grabbing a fluffy towel from below the sink. When you enter the bedroom again, Bucky stands at the edge of the bed sorting through the different utensils.

"This is gonna hurt," he informs you as you lay back on the bed, one of your hands gripping the sheets.

"It's okay," you whisper while nodding your head.

Bucky gives you a small smile before kneeling beside the bed. Your chest heaves rapidly as the super-soldier re-opens your wound. His blue eyes flit up to your face as you stare at the ceiling, trying to keep your mind distracted.

"I'm going to dig around to try and find the device, alright?" He reassures you and you nod your head, swallowing the lump in your throat.

Bucky's flesh hand rests on your stomach, feeling his thumb gently stroke your skin. Two of his vibranium fingers dip into your stab wound, a hiss leaving your lips at the uncomfortable feeling. "B-Bucky-"

"I'm sorry," he apologizes as the metal fingers move around. "It'll be over soon."

You bring your bottom lip between your teeth, biting down harshly. A cry escapes your lips as Bucky's fingers travel deeper, tears pooling in your eyes. Sadness fills Bucky's eyes as you whither beneath his touch, wishing he could find the damn tracker faster.

Bucky's brows raise when his metal fingers graze against something cylindrical. "I got it, doll," the nickname slips out and your heart flutters in your chest, turning your head to face him.

His eyes are already on you, seeing the concerned look swimming in the baby blues. "Agh! Bucky-" you breathe out as the device scrapes along the inside of your skin.

"Sorry," he whispers and manages to pull the tracking device out without hurting you anymore, crushing the tiny object between his vibranium fingers.

You take deep breaths as the super-soldier quickly gets up so he can replace your bandage. You keep your gaze on Bucky the entire time as he tends to the wound. "You're pretty," you whisper, not being able to stop the words from leaving your lips.

Bucky looks up at you through his lashes as he releases a small laugh. Butterflies swarm around your stomach as the man leans forward to press a gentle kiss to the fresh bandage, your breath hitching in your throat.

"You're prettier. Let me get you some water," he mentions before leaving the room once more.

He thinks I'm pretty. You think to yourself as a smile comes to your lips, bringing your gaze back to the ceiling.

-

"Tony, you don't get it. They know someone's after them. I think we should hold off until they're less suspicious," you hear Bucky talking in the other room. A sigh leaves your lips, the argument continuing on as you inspect the bruises on your face in the en suite.

You wince at the tenderness, rubbing the arnica ointment around your left eye. "Look, Bucky, the best I can do is move you to a different room and extend the mission. We can pull out on this now. We're too close," Tony says before hanging up the phone.

"Fucking hell," Bucky mutters as you leave the bathroom. You walk into the living area to see Bucky throw his phone onto the table before plopping onto the couch. "He's not letting us leave."

"I heard," you sit beside him, tucking one of your legs under the other, "I mean he's right in a way. We're so close to capturing this guy. I should've been more careful, I'm sorry."

The blue-eyed man glances towards you, leaning against the furniture. "It's not your fault. You were just doing your job. It's my fault that I made you believe you had to do this yourself," he mentions and you press your lips together.

"Well, good thing we're starting over, yeah?" You ask and Bucky's eyes widen, his lips parting slightly. You chuckle softly at the shocked look on his face and gently press your fingers against his chin, shutting his mouth.

"Y-Yeah, yeah, sorry," Bucky whispers, running a hand through his hair.  You watch as he glides his tongue across his bottom lip, low-key wishing you could taste his lips. "So, we should probably figure out which room Tony moved us to."

You and Bucky proceed to make your way to the lobby and talk to the reception desk, hoping the billionaire already called to make the arrangements. You keep an eye out as Bucky talks to the woman, your fingers drumming along the mahogany desk.

"Ah, yes, I just got off the phone with Mr. Stark. Here are your new room keys," she says with a smile, and Bucky politely thanks her while taking the keycards into his hand.

"C'mon," he mumbles and hesitantly grabs your hand, his blue eyes looking around the place.

Your eyes widen upon seeing the elevator door opening, a few men you recognize standing inside of it and you push Bucky towards the wall.

"Y/N-"

"Kiss me," you whisper and his blue eyes widen as he looks down at you.

"W-What-"

"Public display of affection makes people uncomfortable," you state, remembering Natasha mentioning that if you were ever in a sticky situation.

Bucky wets his lips and nods his head in agreement. "Yes, they do…" he trails off and you let out a huff of breath.

You grab a hold of his shirt, pulling him closer to you as you lean on your toes. Bucky places his hand against the wall, stabilizing himself as your lips connect with his. His vibranium hand grips your hip, a short moan escaping his lips as your fingers card through his hair.

Your heart flutters in your chest at the feeling of his soft lips. It takes Bucky a few seconds before he starts moving his lips against yours, deepening the kiss. You hear the men muttering to themselves as they walk past the two of you.

"Fuckin' kids," one of them grunts.

Bucky leans forward, pressing your back against the wall as he pulls away slightly. You keep your eyes closed and you breathe heavily as his nose nudges yours lightly.

"Are they gone?" He whispers against your lips.

You flutter your eyes open and look over his shoulder, seeing them walking out the main doors of the hotel. "Y-Yeah," you mumble, causing the brunette to take a step back. "Sorry about that, I just… didn't know what else to do."

Bucky shakes his head, mumbling that it’s alright. He reaches for your hand again, leading you towards the elevator. You chew on your bottom lip as the two of you stand in the elevator in silence, feeling the tension between the two of you thickening.

“Why don’t you head to the new room and I’ll work on transferring our stuff?” Bucky mentions and you nod your head in response.

“Sure,” you mumble and grab one of the room keys from his hand, watching the muscly man step out of the elevator. “I’ll see you up there.”

After a short ride up a couple of more floors, you step out of the elevator before heading towards your new room. Maybe one with two beds this time. You think to yourself while placing the key into the lock. You step into the room and let out a gasp, seeing rose petals everywhere. “Oh, no,” you mumble and shut the door quickly, trying to gather as many petals as you can. “What in the actual fuck, Tony. I swear to God,” You mumble to yourself while rolling your eyes.

The door handle to the room begins to turn and you rush towards it, opening it just a smidge. Bucky glances down at you with a concerned look as you try to find the right words. “What’s going on?” He asks you and you press your lips together. “Y/N?”

“Just… don’t take it out on me, okay?” You whisper and Bucky furrows his brows as you fully open the hotel room door.

Bucky’s eyes widened after seeing rose petals everywhere, causing him to curse under his breath. “I’m going to kill him,” he states and a chuckle leaves your lips.

You grab your bag from the hallway before shutting the room’s door. You watch Bucky aggressively pick up flower petals from the floor and furniture. “Maybe this was the only room available,” you chuckle while heading towards the bedroom.

“I doubt it,” he mutters bitterly as you open the secondary door.

“Oh, come one,” you groan as you notice the large king-sized bed sitting in the middle of the room. “Bucky!”

“Yeah?” He calls out, hearing his footsteps grow closer to where you’re standing. You glance over your shoulder and see his lips part in disbelief. “You’re joking me,” Bucky sighs before rubbing his fingers against his forehead.

You tuck a strand of hair behind your ear and wet your lips. “I’ll take the couch this time,” you tell him and Bucky glances down at you.

“Y-You have bruised ribs, Y/N. I’m not going to make you sleep on the couch,” he mentions and you shrug your shoulders in response.

A sigh leaves your lips as you slap your hands along your thighs, turning to face Bucky. “Well, if you’re willing to deal with me… you can sleep in the same bed. I don’t mind,” you shyly tell him, feeling your cheeks flush. You begin to panic when Bucky says nothing and you clear your throat, scratching the back of your neck. “O-Or you don’t have to. I just wanted you to be comfortable.”

Bucky’s blue eyes soften at your words as he watches you walk further into the room. The man wets his lips before running a hand through his hair. “We can share,” he mumbles loud enough for you to hear.

“A-Are you sure?” You stutter, your eyes meeting his and the brunette nods his head in response. Bucky gives you an awkward smile and you let out a tiny giggle, taking a step towards him.

“What are you laughing about?” He huffs and you bite your lip, bringing your hands to his face before lifting the sides of his lips. Bucky playfully rolls his eyes and swats your hands away from him.

A genuine smile graces his pink lips and your heart flutters at the sight. “There’s a real smile,” you tell him, both of your cheeks heating up. “Should do it more often, Bucky, it looks good on you.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Bucky whispers before walking out of the room to gather his things.

-

“Okay, so, I managed to gather some more intel on Gabriel,” Bucky mentions while walking into the bedroom. The super-soldier grabs the laptop Tony supplied him before sitting down on the edge of the bed. “How are you feeling?”

You lift the ice pack from your ribs and glance down at the bruised skin. “As good as I can be, I guess. It still hurts to bend over a bit, but I manage,” you chuckle as Bucky glances over his shoulder, seeing the purplish skin. “What’d you find out?”

“That he’s got a business meeting in the restaurant later tonight. Turns out the man he’s meeting has ties to HYDRA,” Bucky informs you while typing out what he discovered.

Bucky closes the laptop after finishing the report, making sure it is sent to Tony before fully turning the device off. Your eyes watch him gracefully move throughout the room, feeling a bit useless after getting attacked over twenty-four hours ago. “Do you need help with the meeting?” You ask him and the super-soldier shakes his head. “Buck-”

“You still need to heal, Y/N. I got this,” he mentions, and you sigh, running a hand through your hair.

“Can I at least be on comms when you go? I'm tired of just sitting here and doing nothing," you bargain.

Bucky doesn't answer you while pulling his shirt over his head, tossing it on the chair that sits in the corner of the room. "Fine, you can be on comms," he mumbles and you grin as then throws the covers back before getting on the bed.

"Thank you, Bucky," you whisper as the super-soldier lays on his back, staring up at the ceiling.

He turns his head towards you, his eyes noticing the fading bruise under your eye. He shuffles so he's laying on his side before reaching his vibranium hand out. Bucky notices how you don't flinch, seeing the smile steady on your lips as his metal fingers glide across your under-eye.

"Does it hurt?" Bucky whispers and you shake your head.

His eyes flicker down to your lips for a hot second before meeting your eyes again. "Have you ever kissed anyone before me, Bucky?" You ask him as you shuffle a bit closer to him.

You notice his cheeks blush and you teasingly smile at him. "I- No," he confesses and you tuck your lip between your teeth.

"C-Can I ask you a serious question?" You whisper, feeling his breath fanning your face. Bucky nods his head against his pillow, feeling a bit nervous about what you're going to ask. "Why do you hate me?"

A sigh leaves his lips as his blue eyes flutter shut for a few moments. Bucky wets his lips before sitting up, leaning his back against the headboard. You sit up as well, keeping your eyes on him as you notice the gears turning in his head.

"I don't hate you, Y/N. I really don't. I just… I guess I was jealous of you. I mean," Bucky pauses and slaps his hands against his thighs, "I don't have a good reason for being cold to you. Steve's right, you know? I do have a hard time showing my feelings."

Bucky's hand gently grabs yours and strokes the back of your hand. "It took me getting hurt for you to realize," you mumble softly and Bucky's chest clenches.

"I'm sorry that I let you down. I was so apathetic and I know it's pathetic, but I'm going to be here for you here on out," he exclaims and the corner of your mouth lifts into a small smile.

"Promise me?" You whisper as Bucky brings his free hand to your face.

His blue eyes search yours for a few moments before gently kissing your lips. "I promise you."

You rest your forehead against his, a heavy sigh leaving your lips as your heart pounds wildly against your chest. Bucky's hand slides along the side of your throat before resting on the back of your neck. Your lips meet his again while running your hands along his torso.

The kiss didn't last long before the two of you lie back down, your head resting on his chest. "You'll always have a place in me."

-

Taglist: @wkemeup​ @jessalyn-jpeg​ @queen-of-mischief​ @metalbuckaroo​ @thewxntersoldier​ @bumblebet-20​

[inagetawaycarxo]

Post Breakup Run-Ins [WWE]

Warnings: breakups, mentions of cheating, angst, crying, heartbreak, breakout them tissues, me listening to SOUR while writing this, more angst, roman’s part is FULL ANGST, broken hearts, Roman being an ass in Jey’s part and his own part, as well as Drews, asshole!roman, mentions of cheating, insecurities, heartache, alcohol, Seth’s part is short.

A/N: All two parts. This preference involves Drew Mcintyre, Jey Uso, Jimmy Uso, Roman Reigns & Seth Rollins. REQUESTS ARE OPEN!

Drew McIntyre:

Drew and you were on different brands so a breakup was inevitable. Drew and you broke up before survivor series. You were lucky you haven’t run into him yet, but that was all going to change when survivor series happened.

You thought you could avoid him but you were so wrong. You ended up crashing right into his chest.

You were talking to Jey, so your attention wasn’t in front of you. nor was his he was looking at you. you crashed right into something solid. Nearly falling, put a strong muscular arm caught you. the familiar smell invading your nostrils. It was him.

You looked up. Staring into his eyes. he stared into your eyes.

The moment was interrupted by Jey when he pulled you off of Drew. Drew looked annoyed.

“Come on y/n/n,” Jey spoke, before dragging you away quickly. Drew and you stared at each other till you disappeared.

.✫*ﾟ･ﾟ｡.☆.*｡･ﾟ✫*.

“You, okay?” Jey asked noticing that you were spaced out while he guided you to Roman’s private locker room.

“Do you think I should talk to him; I mean the way he stared at me…” You spoke. As Jey and you walked into Roman’s locker room.

Jey fought the urge to roll his eyes. He didn’t why you were under Drew’s spell. He broke your heart because you got drafted to smackdown while he stayed on raw. He couldn’t even bother to try a long-distance relationship with you. In Jey’s eyes Drew didn’t deserve you or a second chance.

“He broke up with you because both of you were on different brands,” Jey pointed out.

“I know but…” You sighed, but Jey cut you off.

“Y/n, if he cared about you, he wouldn’t have broken up with you, he would have tried,” Jey grumbled. Trying to prove a point to you. You must have forgotten all those nights you cried till you had no tears left to cry.

“What are you flapping your gums about?” Roman demanded. Rubbing his temple. Jimmy looked up from his phone, while Paul looked at Jey then at you, then back at Roman.

“Y/n ran into Drew and now she wants to get back with him, which I think is stupid,” Jey grumbled. Making you roll your eyes.

Roman let out a huff. Rolling his eyes. Obviously, you forget how much it broke you when he dumped you.

Roman composed himself. Looking at you. Making your heart jump to your throat.

“He broke your heart, y/n, he couldn’t be man enough to make it work, so he dumped you, broke your heart into pieces, you spent years trying to get over him, and now you want to get back together with him,” Roman hissed out.

“But…” You gasped out. Heart thumping wildly against your ribcage.

“I’m not done talking yet, you are better off without him, he isn’t a man,” Roman spoke in a cold tone. Like he was lecturing you.

Roman got up. Walking over to you. He gently rested his hand on your cheek. Eyes looking into yours.

“I don’t think your heart could take another heartbreak from him,” Roman sighed, stroking your cheek before leaving his locker room. Leaving you standing confused. Paul followed him, as well as Jey. Jimmy trailed behind but stopped beside you.

“Y/n, don’t listen to them, do what your heart tells you, if you want to be with him, then be with him,” Jimmy spoke. Making you smile.

“Thanks, Jimmy,” You beamed. Making him give you a playful wink before he left the room.

You quickly spun around. Opening the locker room door and walking out. Searching for Drew.

After about an hour of searching for him, you were about ready to give up. You couldn’t find him. Cursing to yourself. Maybe Roman and Jey were right.

Pouting to yourself you hopped onto a crate. Wishing the world would swallow you whole. You didn’t see Drew sit down next to you.

“Hey y/n, I’m surprised your guard dogs aren’t around you,” He joked. Making you look up. Surprise edged on your features.

“Drew,” You gasped out. Mentally cursing yourself.

The two of you looked into each other’s eyes for a minute or so of gazing into each other’s eyes, both of you broke the silence at the same time.

“I want to give us another chance,” Both of you spoke at the same time.

You smiled at his response. While he smiled back at you. Drew took a hold of your hand. Intertwining his fingers with yours. Your heartbeat beating a hundred miles. Butterflies swarming inside of your stomach.

“I shouldn’t have broken up with you, these past few years have been torture,” Drew spoke. As you starred at him.

“It’s okay, all that matters now is that we want the same thing, and that’s that we want to get back together, to give us another chance,” You spoke. As Drew closed the space between him and you.

His other hand grabbing the side of your face. Lowering his lips down to yours. His warm lips pressing against yours softly. Eyes fluttering closed as he kissed you…

Jey Uso;

You avoided Jey, and if you did see him you would run in the other direction.

Ever since he joined Roman, he had changed and not for the better either.

Roman told Jey to forget about you, that you weren’t supportive and if you dumped him because he joined family then you never really did love him. The truth was Roman was manipulating him and you couldn’t stand it anymore.

At first, Jey listened to his cousin giving you death glares, but that all faded. He missed you. He missed your touch, your smile, how your hair smelt, how you laugh, he missed deep conversations with you. He was aching for you.

So, he planned to corner you into a corner.

“Jey, what do you want, here to glare me to death,” You asked. Placing your hands on your hips.

Instead of answering you he just grabbed the side of your face and kissed you roughly. Placing your hands on his chest and pushing him away.

“Jey…” You gasped out. Eyebrows furrowing.

“I miss you so much, I need you, I want you back,” Jey begged you. Making your heart ache.

“We can’t, you’ve changed so much, ad Roman hates me,” You sighed. Looking at him with sad eyes.

“Then what if we date in secret?” Jey suggested. Making you think for a second.

You let out a sigh.

“Okay,” You whispered. Jey was close enough to hear. He smiled before kissing you again.

.✫*ﾟ･ﾟ｡.☆.*｡･ﾟ✫*.

Jey let out a content sigh, as you snuggled into his bare chest. Both of you coming down from your high, after having multiple orgasms.

You traced his tattoo. Looking at a bruise of his in concern. Jey knew you weren’t fond of Roman. Or his actions, in fact, you liked to call him a self-centred asshole. Telling Jey he is manipulating him.

“What’s going on in that pretty little mind, well dirty mind?” Jey asked, winking at you on the last line.

You moved your head up, looking at him, to see him staring at you. You playfully rolled your eyes. Lightly swatting him. Jey let out a fake ow.

“I just… I wish your cousin wasn’t so self-centred. He could come and save you when you get attacked by his opponents,” You sighed. Pouting at him.

“Don’t worry, babe,” He replied. His hand cupping the side of your face.

“But I do, you get hurt, and he doesn’t, it’s hard not to,” You sighed heavily. Jey had to distract you. He was still horny, so he thought why not go for another round.

“Let’s not talk about my cousin, not when we can go for another round,” He spoke, shifting his body so he was on top of you. Your heart rate accelerating a few beats.

“But…” You tried to speak but stopped you by putting his finger on your lips.

“Sh,” Jey shushed you making you pout. Jey positioned the head of his cock with your entrance.

Before you could even protest, he entered you. Making a gasp escape your mouth. Jey smirked. Satisfied he got that reaction. Your hands gripped his forearms.

“See so much better than talking about Roman.” Jey groaned out, as your walls clenched around him as he continued to slide into you till bottom out. Your legs wrapped around his waist.

What the two of you failed to notice was that Jimmy and Roman entered Jey’s hotel room, walking in on Jey and you naked about to have sex.

“Yeah, let’s not talk about me while you are fucking this whore, in fact, I thought the both of you broke up, please don’t tell me she manipulated you into sleeping with her,” Roman shouted. Voice booming.

You let out a slight scream. You could have sworn he locked the door. But the two of you were both driven by the lust for each other that the two of you didn’t lock it. However, your shock disappeared at what he said. What a hypocrite, he was the one that was manipulating people.

“Uce,” Jey hissed out. Covering him and you. Jimmy awkwardly adverted his eyes, while Roman just glared at you. You glared back at Roman.

“We wouldn’t have broken up if you didn’t manipulate him,” You hissed out. Giving him an icy glare. Which he shot right back at you.

“Babe,” Jey gasped out. Roman scoffed.

“You are such a brat,” Roman growled out.

“Least I don’t let my cousins do my dirty work or get injured because I couldn’t be bothered to save them,” You hissed out.

“You wouldn’t understand you aren’t a part of the bloodline,” Roman shot back.

Jimmy wished he had popcorn, Jey wished this would end, because he knew Roman would make him choose and he couldn’t do that.

“Uce,” Jey hissed out. Shooting Roman a look.

“You such a manipulating asshole,” You shouted. Voice rising two octaves.

“Y/n,” Jey huffed out. Looking between Roman and you.

“Least I’m not sleeping my way to the top,” Roman smirked. You narrowed your eyes at him.

“That’s enough,” Jey shouted, slightly upset at Roman’s words.

“And there it is,” You chuckled darkly.

“It’s true, you slept with Jey, got attention, now you will probably want to sleep with someone else,” Roman growled out. Glaring at you coldly.

“You really think that low of me,” You spat out.

“Yeah,” Roman smirked.

“You are such an asshole,” You yelled.

“Might be but you wouldn’t understand, even if Jey did make you understand you just wouldn’t get it,” Roman spat out. Crossing his arms. Did he just call you dumb? you thought to yourself. You wrapped the sheet around you, getting up. Jey quickly covered himself with the quilt cover.

“No, you are being a manipulating toxic asshole, I honestly think you need a reality check, and I hope Brock knocks some sense into you,” You shouted. Walking over to him. Roman’s glare intensified.

“Y/n,” Jey hissed out. While Jimmy looked amused. Damn you had balls to stand up to Roman and say that.

“Jey is either her or us?” Roman spoke, giving him an alternative. Making you narrow your eyes.

You quickly slapped him hard. Making Jey gasp and Jimmy try to control his laugh. The slap echoed through the hotel room. Roman grabbed his cheek a red mark formed on his cheek.

“I’ll do you one better, I’m done,” You hissed out. Casting a look at Jey, before you turned your head to look at Roman. Giving him an icy glare. You stormed off. Jey quickly got out of the bed, holding the quilt close, as he chased after you. Roman rolled his eyes.

“Y/n, wait,” Jey gasped out. Voice full of panic. He couldn’t lose you again.

“You are just going to walk out with a sheet wrapped around you,” Roman questioned smugly. Jey shot him a look, as you stopped in the doorway of the front door. The door was half-opened.

“Well, got to keep my slutty reputation up,” You spat out, slamming the door after you exited it.

Jey glared at Roman.

“What the hell was that?” Jey hissed out.

“She wouldn’t understand, and she is a distraction,” Roman responded. Shrugging his shoulders like he just did Jey a huge favour. Jey glared at his cousin….

Jimmy Uso:

Jimmy cheated on you. He begged you for forgiveness telling you it was a moment of weakness and he missed you.

But you weren’t having any of it so, you ended it.

Jimmy vowed to get you back. Yelling at you that he wouldn’t stop until you were his again.

You weren’t really surprised to see him at your doorstep.

The loud sound of persistent knocking came from your front door. Taking you away from the tub of ice cream and the show that was playing on the TV. You whipped your tears away. Before walking to the door. Unlocking it and taking the lock chain off, before opening the door.

You let out a groan of annoyance when you saw Jimmy at your doorstep. Eyes red from crying. He was the one that got himself in this mess. Holding a bouquet. Like they were going to fix the issue.

You were about to close the door, but he stopped you. a look of panic crossing his face.

“Please, y/n, I love you, I am so sorry I cheated on you, it was a moment of weakness, please, I love you,” He pleaded.

You closed your eyes. Fighting the tears back. You then reopened your eyes.

“If you ever loved me, you would have never cheated on me,” You snapped. Before slamming the door and locking it. Putting the chain lock across before walking back to the couch. Turning up the volume on the TV to drown out Jimmy’s pleas.

.✫*ﾟ･ﾟ｡.☆.*｡･ﾟ✫*.

You wished your self-doubt would go away, you wished you didn’t fall in love with Jimmy, but nothing is ever simple or easy in life.

The first few months of the breakup you wallowed. Crying your eyes out. Eating junk food to comfort you. To soothe your breaking heart. It didn’t help when Jimmy kept coming around with gifts trying to apologize. You didn’t want the gifts, you just wanted his love, but he couldn’t give that to you. Because if he even loved you, he wouldn’t have cheated.

He only went away when Sasha threatened him. Chewing his ear out. It pained you to see her get up him, but he did hurt you, and he did deserve her grilling. Sasha was your best friend in the company. Claiming you were the best hairdresser in WWE.

So, when you didn’t come to work, she started to worry about you. Till the point, she came over. Comforting you and telling you, you needed a distraction and to forget about him.

So, here you were at the salon you worked at. Trying to distract yourself. But failing miserably.

A bunch of teenage girls going to prom, made you think of Jimmy. Wishing it were that simple. You styled their hair. Doing your best not to think of Jimmy, asking about who they were going to prom with, what their gowns looked like, but it was hard not to think of Jimmy when his twin brother made his way into the salon. You rolled your eyes, as he walked over to you. The teenage girls swooned over him.

“Is he your boyfriend?” One asked.

“He is so cute,” One of the girls spoke.

“He is so hot,” Another one swooned.

“What do you want Jey?” You asked as you continued to curl the teenage girl's hair. She was the last one.

“Do you have a minute?” Jey asked. As he sat down on the bench to the side. The teenage girls stared at him in awe. While Jey shot them a wink. Some of them blushed while some of them giggled. You rolled your eyes. Shooting him a look.

“Are you two dating?” The teenage girl whose hair you were curling asked. Jey’s eyebrow flicked up.

“She wishes,” He teased. Giving you a playful look. He was trying to cheer you up. Seeing how miserable you looked. You rolled your eyes at his answer.

“He wishes,” You grumbled. As you curl the last strand of her hair.

“Nah, she dated my twin brother,” He spoke. Making the teenage girls gasp.

“There’s another one that looks like you,” One of the girls gushed out.

“Alright girls, all done, go to the counter and I will ring up the price,” You spoke. They all obliged, but not before giving Jey flirty looks.

“Can I have a word?” Jey asked. Making you let out a huff.

“I’m busy,” You huffed out, as you unplugged the curling iron.

“I’ll wait,” Jey responded. Crossing his arm as he sat on one of the chairs.

“Fine, just give me a second,” You sighed. Walking off to go charge the teenage girls. Their mums were there as well. Paying for the styling. You smiled warmly at them as they left the store. Telling the girls to have fun.

You let out a heavy sigh. Dreading to go back and talk to Jey. You knew he would want you to get back with Jimmy.

You took a deep breath before letting it out. Walking back to Jey.

“What do you want Jey?” You sighed out, as you reorganized your kit.

“He misses you, and you miss him, the two of you look like shit, and I before you argue and say he cheated on you, he regrets doing it, he needs you and you need him, can you please look past the fact he cheated on you and go back to him, at least give him another shot or be his friend,” Jey pleaded.

“I can’t Jey,” You sighed. Tears gathering in your eyes you quickly wiped them away.

“At least come back to WWE, everyone misses you,” Jey sighed. You thought about it for a second before looking up at him.

“Fine, but keep Jimmy away from me,” You sighed. Jey smiled brightly. Wrapping his arms around you and pulling you close into his chest. Giving you a bone-crushing hug. You let out a groan of pain. His plan worked, now all he had to do was get Jimmy and you back together…

Roman Reigns:

Breakups were hard. Especially how Roman and you ended. He ended up telling you he still has feelings for Galina and wanted to try again with her.

That left your heart breaking into two. You quickly rushed out of the room, while he called your name.

Ever since then you have been avoiding him. It didn’t help that the two of you worked in the same place, smackdown.

Doubts setting in your mind, where you a placeholder? Did he ever love you? Did he cheat on you?

Unfortunately for you, your luck ran out. You bumped into him in the hallways.

You felt like your throat was closing up. Heart thumping loudly in your eardrums.

“Hey, y/n, I haven’t seen you lately, how are you? Are you okay?” He asked. Looking at you with a general interest. His eyes looked sad. The nerve of him to ask you that, to even speak to you like you are his friend.

“Okay?” You shouted out. tears pricking the corners of your eyes.

“I can’t even look at you without bursting into tears. You broke my heart, you ruined me,” You snapped. Tears falling from your eyes.

Out of habit roman went to wipe them away but you slapped his hand away.

“Did you even love me? Or was it just fake, maybe you even used me just so you felt less lonely,” You snapped. Bianca noticed the Commotion. She quickly walked over to Roman and you. she wasn’t too impressed with how Roman broke your heart, after all, you ran to her crying your eyes out till you passed out. She was your best friend, so she felt a little protective over you.

“I hate you; I never want to talk or see you ever again, heck, I’m going to see if I can go to raw, and if I can’t then I quit,” You yelled. roman looked heartbroken, but you didn’t care.

“Come on y/n/n,” Bianca spoke softly, wrapping her arm around your shoulder and pulling you away from Roman, casting him a glare over her shoulder.

“It’s okay, I’ve got you,” She spoke in a soothing voice. While your body shook in anger.

.✫*ﾟ･ﾟ｡.☆.*｡･ﾟ✫*.

You no longer had emotional breakdowns over Roman. Lies. At least not in front of anyone. Though Bianca believed you weren’t over Roman. Especially since you got drunk to numb the pain or have one-night stands with other guys, to forget about him, and the fact he chooses her not you.

Roman on the other hand after his encounter with you, wasn’t doing so well. He made a mistake breaking up with you to be with Galina.

He saw how cold you were to him, but deep down he knew it was all a front. He knew you were breaking, and he was breaking too. But he knew he couldn’t break up with Galina as well.

She noticed Roman’s behaviour as well. Often finding him deep in thought. Or scrolling through his phone. Looking at selfies of you. Sometimes he would stalk your Instagram as well. At first, she felt jealous, but then she accepted that a part of Roman was going to love you.

“You still love her, don’t you?” Galina asked as she noticed Roman was looking at photos of you again. He quickly locked his phone a little too quickly for her liking.

“It doesn’t matter, I’m with you now, I picked you,” Roman spoke. Flashing her a soft smile. That didn’t quite reach his eyes.

She let out a sigh. Just because he flashed her a smile. She could tell it didn’t reach his eyes. He was miserable without you. Every time he was happy his mind would then wander off to you. His smile turning into a frown. She could tell he missed you.

“Talk to her,” She sighed.

“She hates me,” Roman sighed.

“She hates that you choose me over her, and truthfully I only think you choose me because of the kids, and maybe you do still love me, but I know you love y/n more,” Galina spoke. Giving him a sad smile. He needed to hear it.

Roman tried to speak but Galina cut him off again.

“Go win her back, give you her your all, and if it doesn’t work out, we can try again,” She spoke.

Roman smiled at her sadly. Getting up and walking over to her.

“I’m sorry, for doing this to you,” Roman sighed. Cupping the side of her face. She looked up at him. Slightly smiling. Leaning into him. Her hands grabbed his wrists.

“I know, but you still love her, go get her,” Galina spoke. Leaning up till her lips pressed against his. Kissing each other passionately one last time before he went to your apartment complex…

Nerves racked throughout Roman’s body. Palms clammy. Rehearsing in his mind what he was going to say to you. Roman took a deep shake breath in then exhaled. Clenching his hand into a fist. Bringing his fist up to the door and knocking.

He knocked three times. Calling your name. But got no response. His heart hammered against his rib cage.

“Look, y/n, I know you don’t want to see me, but I left her, I want us to get back together,” Roman spoke voice slight loud.

Roman heard the door behind him. Making him glance over his shoulder. Seeing your neighbour standing there in their pyjamas. Looking slightly annoyed.

“She’s not home,” They grumbled. Looking at Roman in irritation.

“That’s fine, I can wait for her,” Roman replied. Giving your neighbour a forced smile.

“You’ll be waiting for a while,” One of your neighbours spoke. Making Roman shrug his shoulder.

“Your problem,” Your neighbour grumbled. They were about to slam the door when Roman spoke again.

“Is she doing, okay?” Roman asked.

“By okay you mean, coming home drunk while her friend helps her, or doesn’t come home at all till the next day?” Your neighbour shot out. Shotting Roman a glare. Before shutting the door.

Guess he deserved that. But that got Roman worrying more about you. You weren’t doing okay, and it was all because of him….

“And after all, he put me through, I still fucking love him,” You drunkenly blurted out. Making Damian furrow his eyebrows as you downed the shot. An idea popped into his mind.

“How about I get him off your mind?” Damian suggested.

“How?” You asked as Damian got up off the barstool, tilting his head to the side hinting at the dance floor. Holding his hand out to you. You bite your lip, a small smile forming on your lips.

“Okay, handsome,” You slurred out, getting up and taking his hand. Damian pulled you towards the dance floor…

Seth Rollins;

You tried to get transferred to NXT but no, Vince wanted you on Smackdown live.

It was hard to avoid someone you loved, hard to look at him, hard to be happy for him since he was now a father. You weren’t too happy when you found out the woman, he cheated on you with Becky was pregnant, it broke your heart.

So, when you did bump into Seth you cast your gaze down to the ground and walked off muttering an apology and walking off.

Seth felt bad. All the guilt of cheating you eating up inside of him. he tried to apologize to you he really did, but you ignored him. he knew he broke your heart. He loved Becky but deep down in his heart you always held a special place.

.✫*ﾟ･ﾟ｡.☆.*｡･ﾟ✫*.

The alcohol only numbed your heartache to a certain extent. Though you always ended up crying yourself to sleep. You wished that you didn’t fall in love with him, then you wouldn’t be so broken. Wondering what you did wrong.

You tried your best to avoid Seth, especially Becky. You were hoping you would get released to at least ease your pain, but that never happened. You could only wait till your contract ended. Then you could be free of him. Maybe you would wrestler in AEW or Impact anywhere that was free of Seth and Becky.

All you wanted was to be enough for him, and you weren’t. You thought he loved you, but he didn’t. You were sick of feeling heartbroken…

FEEDBACK IS APPRECIATED! IT WOULD MEAN A LOT TO ME IF YOU LEFT FEEDBACK! REQUESTS ARE OPEN!

[probably-haven]

So i was reading venti’s wiki again- as one does, for totally random reasons- and i perceived this line: “ Venti was never able to give that feather to the lad, for that lad had fallen in the battle for the sake of song, sky, and birds, and for the people who, like him, had dwelled within the storm-wall.”

which reminded me of the storybook cutscene about the first flying birds from Amber’s story quest- and my connection fueled mind came upon the following realization

The story of the birds seems an awful lot like a metaphor for the rebellion against Decarabian to me- which i know i dwell on that a lot but hear me out

these are the exact lines from the cutscene:

When the first wisp of wind brushed across the land Birds that yearned for the sky had wings But no way to fly They asked the Anemo God: "How can we reach the heavens?" To which the Anemo God replied: "You have yet to find that which is most important" As the God spoke, the wind thrust the seeds of a dandelion High into the sky The birds thrust out their wings But the breeze was all too mild Leaving them to stumble across the earth So they went to the gorge Where the wind showed off its wild and incomparable strength They threw themselves off the cliff And flapped their wings amongst the howling winds Until they were able to fly freely in the sky To the Anemo God they went, to gleefully say: "We understand now! All we needed was a stronger wind to fly" In reply the Anemo God said: "What you lacked was not wind, but courage" "It is courage that has allowed you to become the first flying birds of this world"

Now consider the following parallels

The birds being a placeholder for the people of Old Mondstadt  Wind being a kind of placeholder for power or divinity The sky/heavens being freedom  the gorge/cliff being the confrontation with Decarabian And courage(”that which is most important”) being both the literal meaning of courage, but also the nameless bard

now, as much as i would like to skip stones and say “imagine if venti wrote it,” it doesn’t fit with the typical writing style for most of the things we know are written by Venti, which tend to have a fair amount more rhyming and a more regular rhythm. 

However, we don’t recognize the voice, and in genshin the person voicing a cutscene tends to be the person telling it or who wrote it so- hear me out.  Gunnhildr. 

now a while back ago i made a post about the roles of a few characters within the rebellion, and i think this fits oddly well. Sharing in the responsibility of subtly commemoration the events that happened. 

-

but anyway now that that explanation is out of the way, may I propose to you a few things:

Venti who finds out after waking up from another one of his long ass naps(the one shortly before the events of the game to be specific) that the story made by another one of his old friends still exists and is still popularly known today, not yet faded from Mondstadt’s memory(unlike a certain dragon, amirite?), although it had admittedly been simplified to a children’s tale. But regardless it still exists as a physical reminder of his memory. 

Plus Venti just seems like the kind of guy who would be pretty fond of children’s stories anyway, and i can’t believe it took me this long and a literal concrete example to realize that headcanon

Venti who puts copies of the storybook in random places in the library just to be a little shit, and Lisa who now automatically knows the culprit whenever she realizes this has happened(and also greatly wonders where tf Venti gets so many copies like damn)

Venti who hears some grown ass person being all angsty and troubled in the corner of Angel’s Share and, with the most serious expression on his face, slides a fucking children’s book across the table as if it were the Knights of Favonius’s most confidential files. 

just- vibes

[ragingbookdragon]

I’m Only A Crack In This Castle Of Glass (Hardly Anything Else I Need To Be) PT. 7

Batfamily x Batsis Story

Word Count: 2.1K Warnings: Explicit Language, Angst

Author’s Note: Anyone order a part seven? Cause I got a part seven for y'all. Enjoy! -Thorne

**********************************************************************

Ever since the meeting that night, she’d gotten more letters from her family than she’d ever received in twenty-one years. Not that she decided to read them. The first line from Dick’s letter was, ”I never wanted you to leave because of me. If only I’d known…”. She couldn’t keep reading, and she wasn’t sure if it were from guilt, sadness, or anger, but there was something there that she didn’t want to face.

It didn’t stop there though. They kept coming even if she tacked a return to sender on it and sent it back. She’d even labeled one and written, ”Stop writing me.” but that didn’t stop them. Wally texted her every other night on top of the letters and she wanted to strangle him through the phone.

She knew though, that if she could keep holding out for three more months, she’d be home free. Wherever home was at this point. Every city she kept thinking about had some type of vigilante and there was nothing that didn’t; eventually she decided on Coast City. Somewhere warm and sunny, and as far from Gotham and Central as possible.

Of course that little voice in the back of her head just kept telling her to talk to them, but she was going to be as stubborn against it as possible—but time was dwindling, and so was her resolve.

***

“Ophelia, have you seen the extra bag of espresso beans? I can’t remember where you put them the other week.” She waited for a response. “Ophelia?” she turned and frowned. “Why did I accept the manager’s position when I can’t even round up my workers?”

She walked out of the storage and wiped her hands on the rag at her waist. “Ophelia?” A giggle sounded at the counter and when she walked out, her eyes went wide at the sight.

Jason was leaning against the counter with that smile he used to use on the models at the galas. He smiled at Ophelia. “Tell me, what do you make better, the cappuccinos or lattes?”

“Well, I make a —”

“She makes a mean ‘get in the back and find my espresso beans’,” she grunted and both of them jumped.

“Melisandre!” Ophelia stuttered, pale cheeks flushing pink. “I thought you were in the back.”

“I was. Think you can go find the coffee beans you put away?” She shot Ophelia a stare that screamed ‘scram’ and the girl nodded, hurrying to the storage room.

“Aww, why’d you run the cutie off, Melisandre?” Jason queried. “I was going to ask her out on—”

“Can I talk to you?” she interrupted, voice barely containing her seething rage. “Outside.”

Jason shrugged and shoved his hands in his jean pockets. “Sure, but be careful, people might get suspicious.”

She grunted and walked outside, listening to him follow and when the door shut, she turned around and hissed, “What the fuck are you doing here?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I was just getting coffee.”

“Oh, don’t play dumb with me, Jason. We both know that’s a load of bullshit.”

His eyes narrowed and he noted, “You’ve really gotten comfortable using foul language. You know that, (Y/N)?”

She glared at him. “What. Do. You. Want.”

“You won’t answer our letters,” he shrugged. “Didn’t have a lot of options to talk.”

“And showing up at my job is the better option?” she griped.

“It was that or your house, (Y/N). Take your pick but you can’t have both.”

“Well, maybe my silence is supposed to be the answer to those letters. Did you think about that?”

“I did,” he nodded. “But after the third letter being rejected, I decided to go big or go home.”

(Y/N) growled. “Go home.”

Jason smirked. “No.”

“I’m not fucking joking here, Jason. I don’t want you coming here. Ever.”

“Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn,” he retorted then stepped forward and grabbed her wrist. “You don’t wanna talk willingly, fine. I’ll make you talk to me. And if I have to show up here every day, I will.”

“No, you won’t.”

Jason cocked a brow and tightened his grip. “You wanna bet? Because I’m not Dick and I’m sure as hell not Bruce. I don’t have a day job to get to.” He smirked. “I can do this all day.”

(Y/N) bit the inside of her cheek and thought for a moment then sighed and yanked her arm away. “Fine. Come to my apartment after five. We’ll talk there.”

“Thank—”

“Don’t thank me yet,” she interrupted coldly. “I’m agreeing for one meeting and then you fuck off back to Gotham City and leave me the hell alone for good.” She spun on her heel and started back for the door when his voice reached her, tired and pained.

“Do you really hate all of us? Do you really hate us like you make yourself think you do?”

(Y/N)’s feet felt like lead and she stopped, gazing at the glass door. “I don’t know, Jason.”

“Then let me help.”

“You can find the apartment on your own. I know you’re good at looking for homes.” She slipped in the café door, leaving him standing there shocked and hurt.

***

Sure enough, a minute after five o’clock, her doorbell rang and she called, “It’s open.” The door opened and shut, and she looked up from the little kitchenette, watching the way Jason walked into her apartment, gazing around the empty living room.

“Shit, do you live in a home or a prison cell?”

(Y/N) grunted. “Nice quip. Come up with that by yourself?”

He wandered into the kitchen, leaning back against the counter as she prepared dinner. “What’re you making?”

“Chicken marsala,” she replied. “You’re here to talk. Start talking.”

“Are you going to be a bitch like you were the other night or can I ask about life in Central the last three years?” she shot him a glare, warning him, but he paid it no mind. “You going to school?”

(Y/N) nodded. “I go to Central City Community College. Take classes all week at different times.”

“What are you studying?” he asked.

“For now, general studies, but I’m minoring in political science.”

“Planning on a four year after you graduate?”

She shrugged. “Maybe. Maybe not.” Her hands stalled for a moment. “I don’t have the money for a big school to get a bachelors.” Shaking her head, she chopped up the vegetables. “Figure if I can get a job in the area, I can scrounge up enough to start the process though.”

“Might take years,” Jason noted, and she nodded.

“Yeah, hard work usually does.” (Y/N) glanced at him. “What’s Cassandra like?”

He blinked, evidently not expecting that, though he recovered and smiled. “She’s great honestly. Kicks ass better than anyone I know.”

“Even Batman?”

Jason huffed a laugh. “I’m sure she could wipe the floor with each of us if she decided to not hold back. Her mom’s Lady Shiva and her dad’s David Cain.”

“I don’t know who they are but I’m assuming from the tone that they’re not exactly the best parents in the world.”

“No…they’re not.” He agreed. “David didn’t teach Cass how to speak so she’s been mute all her life.”

“I’ve heard the few interviews she’s given,” (Y/N) replied. “She’s very eloquent when she does.”

“Shakespeare’s influence. And probably Emily Dickinson.” He smiled. “I leave her a lot of books to read so I can be her favorite.”

She snorted. “Yeah, that sounds like you.” Sliding the cast iron skillet into the oven, she sat at the crappy metal dining table, Jason taking the seat on the other side. (Y/N) scratched at the table. “Does Bruce like her?” she questioned lowly, and he nodded.

“Loves her like she’s his own.” He her with cautious eyes. “Just like he loves you.” Jason watched the emotion flash across her face, quick as lighting, a deep sorrow, then she was humming.

“Well, that’s good then.” She cleared her throat and looked at the clock. “How’ve you been? I hear a lot about Outlaws.”

Jason chuckled. “Yeah, that’s my band of renegades. Me, Roy Harper, and Koriand’r.”

“Remind me, those were Speedy and Starfire, right?”

He snorted. “Arsenal and Starfire. But yeah, close enough.”

(Y/N) got up and pulled two glasses from the cabinet before going to the refrigerator and getting the lemonade. She poured them both glasses and sat back down. “How’d you manage to wrangle two of the Titans into your posse?”

“Kori willingly tagged along, and Roy won’t leave me alone,” he griped, sipping his lemonade.

“Mmm…and how does Dick feel about you stealing two of his exes?”

Jason choked on his drink, spilling it on the table and down his chin. “That’s not—” he coughed. “That’s not what that is.”

“Uh huh, sure it’s not.”

“It isn’t,” he glowered.

“Riiiiiiight,” she drawled out with a grin, then took a sip and set her glass back down. “Figured you’d get Cass along with you. she seems like she’d be fit for Outlaws.”

He shook his head. “Nah, she’d be better off with Tim and his Young Justice weirdos.”

“She non-lethal?”

“Mhm.”

They dwindled into silence until the timer went off on the oven and she pulled the skillet out and set two plates on the table. “You’re gonna feed me?” he asked as she handed him a fork.

(Y/N) scoffed. “Duh. I’m a bitch, but I’m a bitch with manners.” She smiled sweetly. “But you have to leave afterwards.”

“Mmm…can I crash on your couch?”

“No.”

“Please?”

“No.”

He shrugged. “Figured I’d try anyways.”

They ate in silence, occasionally speaking about their lives the last three years, and when the food was all gone and the lemonade drunk, he sighed and reclined in the chair.

“What?” (Y/N) questioned and he shrugged.

“Dunno…I’d like to do this again soon.” His teal eyes found hers. “It’s been too long since we were together.”

“Tread carefully,” she murmured, looking at the wall and he sighed.

“Sis, talk to me,” he begged. “Even if it’s just to tell me how much you hate me, just talk to me.” She didn’t respond and he sighed again, standing from the table. “Thanks for dinner.”

“…I hate that you all put Gotham and every civilian before our family.” Jason stopped dead in his tracks and turned, gazing at her, though she didn’t tear her eyes from the wall. “I hate that the only time I felt like anyone paid any attention to me was when we were at galas and even then, the attention was just for show. It didn’t matter because all anyone wanted to do was get the hell out of the manor and go on patrol. It didn’t matter because I wasn’t like any of you. I wasn’t a part of the real family.”

Tears gathered in her eyes. “I hate that I spent more nights sitting in a dark and silent manor than spending them with my family. I hate that I never had a normal family growing up where we’d go for ice-cream after school and attend school performances. I hate that I got stuck with a bunch of siblings hellbent on giving every piece of themselves to the world and they couldn’t take one night off to have a family night to save their lives. To at least pretend to be normal.”

(Y/N) finally took her eyes from the wall and he felt his heart tighten as the tears slipped down her cheeks and she breathed, “I hate that I was born Bruce Wayne’s biological daughter and I’d give anything and everything I have to be someone else’s daughter and sister.”

Jason’s mouth felt dry, and he didn’t have single thing to say to her and she whispered, “Is that what you wanted to hear, Jason?” she blinked. “Because that’s what I feel every morning I wake up.”

“I’m sorry,” he murmured, and she cleared her throat, wiping her cheeks.

“Yeah well, I’m three years passed sorry.” (Y/N) nodded to the front door. “You should leave now.”

Jason nodded but his feet didn’t move. For a moment, he couldn’t move them, then he sucked in a breath and started edging back to the door. When he neared the door, he pulled it open and paused, looking back at her. “(Y/N)?” she didn’t answer but he said it anyway. “I love you. More than you’ve ever known.” He sighed and stepped out, closing it behind him.

(Y/N) buried her face in her hands and sobbed alone at the dinner table.

********************************************************************************

Tags!: @itsnottilly @cloudyskylines @starflyer-104 @iwillstaywiththemforever @justine-en @weirdgirlfromtx @notsostraightweeb @candlestudy @willowoo @peterxwade24 @the-atlantic-french-fry @bad-bouquet-of-emotions @vvipgot7be @pure-princess-97 @atomicsoulhumanspy @foreverthefloor @natatawa-ako @impactshawol @bethabear12 @adazzlingsakura @kimhanbiin @thatanonymouschocolate @mischief-writter-24-7 @lostinwonderland314 @elz-zalarrr @lady-of-the-abyss @peqchynero @d3m0n8ch1ld @goldenguki @fallen-wolf22 @battlenix

[halsteadlover]

𝐓𝐫𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐨𝐫 𝐃𝐚𝐫𝐞

*Gif not mine credits to the owner*

• Pairing: Jay Halstead x Reader.

• Requested by anon: Could you write a Jay fic where they are on a stake out and are bored so he’s suggests something to pass the time ✨

• Warnings: just a slight mention of guns.

• Word count: 2271.

• A/N: this is the worst and ugliest thing I've ever written and I don't even know why I'm posting it. To the person that made this request I'm so sorry pls have mercy 😭

You were sitting in the passenger seat, your head resting on the window while you had your gaze fixed on the house and the people passing by, boredom taking over. Being on a stakeout was one of the activities you least liked about being a cop. Being locked in a car for hours to watch someone, without having the chance to go to the bathroom or stretch your bones was really nerve-wracking and that time unfortunately it was your and your partner Jay turn. He was sitting in the driver’s seat, one hand resting on the steering wheel as his fingers drummed on it, the other holding his chin, his elbow resting on the window, looking handsome as always.

“Damn we've been here for four hours, when is the bastard going to get out?” you suddenly blurted out, running your hands through your hair and snorting. Intelligence was working on a murder case of a gang member, Cobras, and at the time the main suspect was the rival gang member, Oliver Romero. Although there was not enough material evidence to arrest him, you all knew it was him, you just had to wait for him to take a misstep in order to catch him. And that’s why Voight ordered you and Jay to follow him wherever he went.

“I wish I knew, I don’t feel my ass anymore” Jay commented, letting out a sigh before taking the box of chips and handing it to you “Do you want some?”

You turned your head towards him “Oh yeah thanks” you replied before grabbing some and starting to eat them. It was now late afternoon and you had been sitting in front of Romero’s house for almost five hours waiting for something to happen, but nothing, he didn’t leave the house even once.

“Still nothing?” you asked after some time.

Jay wiped his hands with a tissue and took out the binoculars so he could take a closer look at the suspect’s house. “Nothing, he just keeps sitting, eating and watching TV.”

“Great.”

“You wanna play a game?” Jay asked suddenly and you gave him a bewildered look.

“What are you ten years old?”.

He chuckled. “C’mon it’s clear that you’re bored to death and so am I. Let’s spend some time.”

He wasn’t all wrong. Everything would’ve been better than just sitting doing nothing. “Fine, what game do you want to play?”

“Truth or dare?” he asked and you looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

“Didn’t you think of anything else?”

“Do you have something better in mind?” he asked ironically, looking at you with a raised eyebrow too and to your non-response he continued to speak “As I thought. So… I’ll start. Truth or Dare?”

You thought about it for a second. “Hmm… Truth.”

Jay looked at you with a grin on his lips, as if he expected you to choose that option. “Worst date you’ve ever been to.”

You giggled. “I went out with a guy once who did nothing but talk about his mother all night. Believe me. All. Night. Long. And as if that wasn’t enough, he called her and made me talk to her saying he thought he found the love of his life…”

“This can’t be true” Jay burst out laughing.

“Yeah unfortunately it is… And at the end of the evening he said ‘sorry I forgot my wallet at home, can you pay?’”

“You cannot be serious!” he said between laughter.

“What can I say… I’ve never been sentimentally lucky” you shrugged, shivering at the memory of that horrible date “Your turn… Truth or Dare?”

Jay didn’t answer right away, continuing to laugh instead.

“Can you stop it?” you asked, your arms crossed over his chest as you tried to suppress a smile at seeing him laugh so heartily. God, the way his face and eyes lit up every time he laughed was something that would always give you butterflies in your stomach.

“I’m sorry I can’t help it… It’s just so funny,” he could hardly say “Okay, okay now I’ll stop… I choose dare.”

“Call a random person and sing them happy birthday”

“C’mon is this the first thing that came to your mind?” he teased you by earning a punch on his arm from you.

“You know I’m not good at these type of game so shut up and make the call.”

Jay took his cell phone from his pocket and clicked on the last number in the call log, which was his brother Will. Needless to say, he thought his brother was totally insane. “Jay are you on drugs?”

“Shut up it’s just a dare. Bye” he responded before hanging up while you were laughing your ass off.

“Have you ever thought about going to America’s got talent?”

“Ah ah so funny,” he said with a smile then taking a bottle of water and taking a sip while in the meantime you continued to guard the house “Truth or dare?”

“Dare.”

“Show me the most embarrassing photo or video on your phone.”

“Uh I have too many,” you replied pulling out your cell phone before looking in the gallery “Hey mind your business.” You stated noticing the way Jay was trying to peek.

He threw his hands up. “I didn’t see anything unfortunately, I was hoping for a naked photo of you.”

You laughed and slightly hitting him on the back of his head. “Dream Halstead,” you said “There you go”. You handed him your phone showing him the video of your graduation ceremony when you got up to get the parchment and fell on the stage… In front of the whole school. Yeah, one of the most embarrassing moments of your life.

Jay’s stomach started to ache from laughter, tears in his eyes. “Oh my god… Please send me this.”

“Don’t even think about it”. You snatched the cell phone from his hands, locked the screen and put it back in his pocket. You knew that you would regret the decision to show him that video, knowing that now he would hold you back until the rest of your days.

“Are you done?” you asked with a fake annoyed tone even if in reality you were trying not to laugh “Truth or dare?”

Jay wiped the tears in the corners of his eyes and looked at you, bursting out laughing again at your expression. “I’m so sorry I just can’t stop…” he said running his hands over his face “Oh my god I can’t breath…”

“I'm happy to know that my bad luck entertains you so much.”

“The way you fell…” he gasped for air “You folded like a paper sheet.”

“Can you stop it please, I still haven’t recovered from this trauma,” you said laughing.

Jay kept laughing for literally another five minutes and when he finally managed to stop you said to him again “Are you done?”

He took a deep breath and drank another sip of water. “Yeah I won’t laugh again I promise.”

“It will be better for you. So truth or dare?”

“Truth.”

“What’s your biggest fear?”

“So you can use it against me? Don’t even think about it, I’ll never tell you. “

“Oh c’mon what kind of person do you think I am?” you asked in a mock offended tone. He looked at you with a raised eyebrow “Okay fine. Besides I already know it.”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah. Spiders.”

“I’m not afraid of spiders!”

“Oh so you don’t remember when you called me and made me come to your house to send one away?”

Jay rolled his eyes and snorted. “It wasn’t that, I just wanted to spend some time with my partner.”

“In the middle of the night?” you asked rhetorically “Jay you were on the verge of a breakdown.”

“Y/LN you promised me you’d never talk about it again!” he exclaimed pointing his finger at you, making you giggle.

“No, I promised I wouldn’t tell anyone not that I would never talk about it again.”

“I hate you, you know that?”

You pinched his cheek. “Nah I know you love me.”

There was a brief moment when you and Jay looked into each other’s eyes, in silence, and it was as if you had forgotten what you were talking about. They way his eyes made always your heart melt was something you were used to by now and you were almost afraid to keep his gaze because of the intensity with which he looked at you, as if he could read inside you and understand how you felt.

His lips lifted in a small smile that made your heart rate increase. “Yeah… I do,” there was another moment of pause as they both looked away from each other. You tried to ignore the way your cheeks were blushing as you looked at Romero’ house.

“It’s your turn Y/LN” Jay said.

“Truth.”

“Tell me your biggest secret.”

You turned your head towards him, noticing that he was already looking at you. “It wouldn’t be my biggest secret anymore if I told you, don’t you think?”

“That’s the rule detective, you have to tell me now.”

How could you tell him that your secret was that you had the biggest crush on him? The word crush was even an understatement, this term did not fully express what you really felt for him. The truth was that you fell in love with your partner but were forced to ignore it and act as if there was nothing but friendship between you. Over time, you and Jay had formed a beautiful and strong bond and the fear that you could ruin it due to your unrequited feelings was always high.

“No…” you were about to say when a movement caught your attention “Jay look.”

It was Oliver Romero and he was walking out of his house, heading to his car. Jay immediately turned on the car and followed him as soon as Romero drove away.

“5021 Peter, we’re following Oliver Romero on Belmont Avenue.”

“Copy 5021 Peter.”

You followed Romero for about ten minutes until he pulled up in front of a house, you and Jay two cars behind him. The neighborhood you were in was the territory of the Vice Lords gang, the same gang that included the murder victim you were investigating.

Needless to say, you and Jay knew why he was there.

After a couple of moments of waiting Romero got out of his car and your suspicion turned out to be true.

“He has a gun!” Jay exclaimed and at that point you immediately rushed out of the car.

“Police drop your weapon!” you shouted pointing the gun at him but Romero started running.

“This is 5021 George we’re chasing an armed suspect, he is running between Nelson and Barry!”

“Police freeze!” you shouted again. Despite your constant warnings the suspect didn’t stop, in fact he continued to run as fast as he could. He turned a corner and you followed him. Jay, who was standing in front of you, put a hand in front of you so he could first check that Romero wasn’t lurking to shoot.

Luckily there was a gate at the end of that road and as he tried to climb over it this allowed you and Jay to reach him and tackle him to the ground.

You had your gun pointed at him while you disarmed him and Jay handcuffed him.

“You’re done son of a bitch.”

Romero confessed everything before he even set foot in the district's interrogation room, which made your job easier and allowed you to successfully close the case.

By the time you finished filing the arrest report it was evening and you were heading to your car to be able to go home when a voice made you stop.

“Y/N wait!”

You recognized that voice right away.

“Halstead” you said stopping in your footsteps and turning to face him.

“Are you going back home?”

“Yes actually, why?”

“You didn’t answer me” he said and a totally confused expression appeared on your face.

“What are you talking about?”

“About your biggest secret.”

You felt your heart skip a beat. You totally forgot about that game. “Oh my God Jay forget about it, it was just a game.”

“You won’t get away from this, you know that right?”

“And you know it’s none of your business right?” you said with an ironic tone, your arms crossed.

“C’mon Y/N that’s the rule and besides I’m your partner, what is it you don’t want to tell me?”

“As I said, it’s none of your business.”

“It will never be that bad right?”

Yes it is.

You let out a heavy sigh, trying to think of something to say to distract him but unfortunately nothing came to your mind. “I have to go Jay, I’m really tired.”

He took a step towards you and that was enough for you to stop breathing. “What’s wrong Y/N?”

“You’re getting on my nerves Halstead, you’re so nosy.”

He let out a chuckle. “But you love me right? Even if I’m nosy.”

You looked down for a few seconds before looking him in the eye again. “I do.”

“So why don’t you tell me your secret? You can trust me, I’m your best friend.”

You let out a heavier snort than you would’ve liked and you rolled your eyes, your patience now gone. “You want to know my biggest secret Jay? Fine,” you stated “I’m in love with you! That’s the secret! Are you happy now?”

Jay didn’t say anything, he just kept looking at you, and at that point your heart broke, knowing that you had ruined your friendship and regretting having said those words.

Your eyes filled with tears but you didn’t want him to see you cry, you didn’t want to give away what little pride you had left. You were ready to leave but Jay grabbed your hand with his, making you stop.

“Hey look at me” he said and when you did, your breath froze again on noticing the closeness between you two.

“Jay you don’t have to say anything…”

“Stop” he interrupted you cupping your face with his hands “I have a dare for you.”

You looked at him as if he lost his mind, not knowing whether to be angry or shocked. You just confessed you were in love with him and he still wanted to play that stupid game?

“Are you serious right now?”

He caressed your cheeks with his thumbs, a smirk on his lips. “I’m always serious.”

Incredulous you tried to get away but he stopped you again.

“Kiss me.”

For an instant you thought you had heard wrong, that your mind was playing some tricks on you. “W-what?”

“I dare you to kiss me.”

You were so in shock that you didn’t know what to do, you just looked at him with wide eyes and slightly wide open mouth.

“So?” he whispered whit a smile on his lips.

“Jay I swear to God if you’re play-…” he didn’t even let you finish saying that sentence that he pressed his mouth on yours. Before you could even think about it, you were already kissing him back. No matter how many times you imagined that moment, the reality of how it made you feel being able to finally kiss him exceeded any kind of expectation.

“I’m not playing, not when it comes to you Y/N,” he whispered, his lips still brushing yours “I just didn’t know if you felt the same way and I didn’t want to ruin our friendship but yeah… I’m in love with you too.”

The smile you gave was one of the most beautiful Jay had ever seen and he felt stupid for not making the first move, for losing so much pining and looking at you from afar, time you could have spent together.

You didn’t say anything else, you were never good with words, instead you carried out his dare, kissing him again.

Click here to be added in the tag list ❤️

Main Masterlist

Jay Halstead Masterlist

Support me on Ko-Fi ☕️

Side blog -> @halsteadloverslibrary

Ask link 💭