#self-love is self-care

[danpuff-ao3]

Self-Celebration

me: oh no, I've gotten nothing done, I'm a failure

them: wow, Danni, how do you do so much????

I, maybe, need a good reminder of all of my accomplishments, so here we go. Everything I've accomplished this year so far. That I remember, anyway.

Threw together my HP Astro series; edited and formatted and posted to AO3 in time for Bethy's birthday!

Got White Lies & Silver Bells ready to go live on AO3 as soon as Hoggywartyxmas reveals were up!

Wrote Again (and Again) on a whim, to accompany A-Loveunlaced's Snarry art

Wrote a BUNCH of random drabbles for a House of Snarry challenge. 6 of which I also posted to AO3! (A handful of which I have not yet.)

Wrote 5 fics for Kinkuary! 2 of which are in the same universe as Contempt. 2 of which are not yet posted (waiting for the 27th and 28th!) 1 of which (the longest of which) I wrote, edited, and posted same day! The day after I had a tooth extraction.

Wrote 3 fics for Chan Fest! All of which I wrote, edited, and posted same day. 2 of which are 5k+ words!

Various words in various other places.

Brainstorming for other fics.

Co-modding @hp-chan-fest

Starting @hp-fruit-fest (and running solo, RIP me)

Modly duties on the Snarry Sanctuary Discord server

Keeping on top of my AO3 comments! (You know, responding to them.)

New HP Astro posts (Lily, Snily, Luna, and Ron (to be posted 3/1/23!))

Made several ship and fic related playlists on Spotify

Made TONS of fic banners on Canva.

Several rec lists! 8 posted so far, and a few queued up!

Got my home office all set up and cozy!

Brainstorming ideas with friends

Helping alpha/beta/cheer read for friends

Try to stay involved in the community/socializing on Discord, Tumblr, Twitter, Reddit.

Supporting other creators as much as possible!

Finally took the time to learn how to create work skins on AO3!

And site skins!! And finally got all fic stats and personal stats hidden (for mental health!)

Fought with site skin codes on behalf of a friend, to get it tuned to her liking, so that she has a clean and stress-free environment if/when she returns to fandom! (The perks of having your friends' AO3 login haha!) (This took like an hour I stg and I was being way too stubborn to stop fiddling and consult a guide.) (But oh well, I did the dang thing!!!!)

Started compiling resources I need to begin book binding! Still a ways off before I can start cuz supplies are not cheap, but I'm on the right path!

ALSOOOOO

Working a full time job

Spending time with my longtime partner (my beloved Eddie-bear!)

I actually watched a still-newish show for once! Wednesday!

Finished reorganizing/decluttering my home

Baked...a lot. Mostly cookies. Going to bake brownies this weekend!

Many doctor's appointments

And medication changes

I filed my taxes!!

Oh yeah and started being a teensy bit more sociable at work! I had a nice long conversation about ASTROLOGY the other day which was fun and great and awesome.

Oh let's not forget about all my work accomplishments! I made 8 years with my company. All the people coming and going (which I get to deal with.) Our census going way up. Many IT calls and playing IT person for small tech problems. Many errands run. Oh yeah and all the new tasks I get to do because our funder and our corporate office BOTH love changing expectations frequently.

So like...there's stuff I wish I could do and haven't been able to yet. But I'm far from a failure! Or lazy, for that matter. I am a lady of ACCOMPLISHMENT.

[recoverr]

i don't know who needs to hear this, but guilt, self-hatred and shame are not sustainable sources of growth and healing. you can't hate yourself into feeling better, or being better. you can't repeatedly punish yourself for your flawed humanity and expect wholesome results.

[thepeacefulgarden]

[caringforourselves]

trying your best does not mean putting an unbearable amount of strain on yourself.

[smiles-advice]

there is no such thing as being "behind in life" but it's okay to recognise that you missed out on some things whilst you were busy surviving

[sugarsprinklesoul]

Abilities that will forever benefit you

The ability to walk away

The ability to manage your time

The ability to remain consistent

The ability to self analyze

The ability to learn how to learn

The ability to understand others

The ability to listen

The ability to express your thoughts and feelings

The ability to break down tasks

The ability to adapt

The ability to control your mind

The ability to ask for help

The ability to act upon facts not feelings

[honeyymistt]

i’ve heard a lot of people say “don’t reach out to your friends first and see how many people will remain in your life. those are your true friends” and i get it. it sucks and it’s tiring constantly being the one to message first, to initiate hang outs but don’t take this so literally. some friendships require initiation. i have lost touch with so many people who genuinely cared about me and wanted me in their life because i stopped reaching out. it’s a hard pill to swallow but honestly some people just suck at it and it doesn’t mean they don’t love and value you. i’ve reconnected with some people over the past few months and it’s crazy how genuinely happy they are to see me and how engaged they are in the conversation. i just think sometimes we’re too harsh on each other & too quick to emphasize other peoples flaws and remove them from our lives but then we’ll all be alone and what’s the point of life then!!!!

[catchymemes]

[arisingsun]

[the-joy-of-knowledge]

25 Laws of power for women

Conceal your goals especially the ones that are appealing. Losing weight, reinventing yourself, marrying wealthy. Instead talk about your altruistic goals - to help children, invest in education, this will chase insecure people with vile intentions.

Do not give anyone your source of power: Was is a book that changed your life? a mentor? a movie? Never give up your secret to success. If forced to do say allude to God, the universe, the a random phenomenon

Use the patriarchy to your favor; we live in a world that is, only associate with men who have power, use that power for good.

Never appear too perfect but be selectively vulnerable when needed. Only share something that you will be comfortable saying. You might say “I forget my keys all the time,” “I don’t know how to perfectly park a car “. But never disclose something you are not comfortable with just because you are afraid of being perfect.

Maintain distance in relationships. Friends are the best and you need them. But if you feel that they are becoming too dependent, see them at your own will. But also the reverse could be the case. Your friend may keep a distance, and that is the way of life. You have got to move on from it.

Develop your own style that makes you unique, beautiful, and elegant. Avoid trying to fit in the crowd of people who claim to care less about their style yet have too many opinions about other women’s style

Avoid male friends at all cost, you will have male colleagues, male bosses, male acquaintances, business partners. Keep it that way. You do not want a Truman Capote divulging your secrets to the world. Do not keep a man who does not fit your standard.

You do not have to win at every game. Pick and choose what is best for you and leave room for others. And step down if you have attained that level of success, do not let the society do it for you.

Trust people but remember that we are all humans. So trust with discretion!

Confuse people with kindness; people are not always comfortable with beautiful and intelligent women. That power is too intimidating so confuse them by being genuinely generous, curious, kind, and passionate.

Keep your strong opinions to yourself.. if you support a movement, a way of life, do so silently.

We all have dirty laundry, wash them privately, don’t expose yourself. Remain silent when people try to attack you or shame you. Whatever is not confirmed is not true. You are the only one who knows all the truth about you.

Don’t attract pity or praise: People who pity you do not help you, in fact they might think that you are weak and could mock you at their annual gossipping meeting. And if you are doing things for the sake of praise you are wasting your time.

Choose yourself all the time; never put any one’s feelings above yours.

Trust your own intuition if you feel someone is being malicious towards you, giving you back handed compliments then you should let them go

Never speak bad of another woman. Do not lazy around gossipping. Keep your hands clean and your conscience clear.

Avoid women with low self esteem they will bring you down. For some reason they do not like seeing other women who are doing better than them

Be careful who you seek validation from. Not everyone needs to be pleased. If they are in no way capable of contributing to your life in the ways you prefer, then don’t ask them for their opinions or please them.

Do not compete with other women, if you do you are only putting them on a pedestal. You are making the the standard by which you measure your progress. If you do compete, begin digging your grave.

Do not give unsolicited advice, do not share the inner workings of your mind, If your mouth is very charitable you better start journaling.

Be well-rounded and interesting. It attracts people. It also keeps you busy because you are continually improving and learning. An idle mind is an easily subdued one.

Avoid women who want to live vicariously through you; they want to know who you know, shop where you shop, befriend who you befriend, wear what you wear.

Pay attention to the source of your discomfort; get rid of them. You tell them your dreams and they remind you of all your hindrances. They ask why are you dressed so fancy as though fancy isn’t subjective. They undermine you interests and goals. They will also be quick to bring you down because they are afraid of your potential.

Do not fear power or please power. When we see powerful people we try to hard to befriend them, to be close to them but you need to be comfortable without them. Don’t push yourself in the name of friendship, do not try too hard to be in their inner circle. Your independence of mind is the most important. Instead become a powerful woman, aloof to the presence of power but aware of its importance. Be an ingenious and intelligent and use your creativity to uplift yourself. When you do so it will be hard to ignore you. Even the powerful will become an ally.

Enjoy moments of solitude. Use that time to develop yourself, improve your body, learn new skills, create with your mind, read widely, become more elegant, then launch yourself.

Remember the most powerful women are the most intelligent. Inspired by Robert Greene's 48 Laws of Power. Use at your discretion.

[moniqueesworld]

Black women dump.

[sunflorally]

you don’t talk too much. you aren’t too loud. you aren’t too needy. you aren’t too sensitive. you aren’t too this, or that. you aren’t too much anything. you will never be too much: you are you, and you are allowed to take up space. you are allowed to exist however you choose.

[healing-is-cool]

You are going to laugh until your stomach hurts again. You're going to be in awe of a sunset. Watch your favorite show while you eat your favorite food. Find money on the street. Discover a great band you haven't heard of before. You will find your way back.

[sugarsprinklesoul]

Small ways to activate your "happiness" chemicals

DOPAMINE: the reward chemical

• Complete a task

• Doing self care activites

• Eating some food

• Celebrating your little wins.

OXYTOCIN: the love hormones

• Playing with a dog

• Playing with a baby

• Holding hands

• Hugging someone

• Giving someone else a compliment

SEROTONIN: the mood stabiliser

• Meditating

• Running

• Be in the sun

• Walk in nature

• Swimming

ENDORPHIN: the pain relief

• Laughing exercises

• Essential oils

• Eating dark chocolate

• Running

[soldrawss]

*holds face tenderly*