#so yeah you can understand the kind of stress I'm under

[michaelawinter]

Andre Nikto head canons

We have little information about Niko but here's what I've gathered..

((Also I'd like to kindly add, hi, hello, my name is Mika and I am a Bosnian. The chances of me adding some accurate slav head canons are always high but never low!!🙏🏻 ALSO IM TERRIBLY OBSESSED WITH NIKTO SO IF ENJOY THIS AND YOU WANT DATING NIKTO HEAD CANONS PLEASE LET ME KNOWWW))

Genuine head canons:

Andre Nikto (Никто) is a (scary) Russian military man, roughly 193/194 centimetres (when you compare him to Simon's height) He suffers with acute dissociative disorder (better said DID) yet is still serving the military cause of how he preforms during battle.., so the military still views him as a ideal soldier for combat despite his disorder..

No hate but from what I've seen in some art works claiming it's his "face reveal" you people have to understand that under his mask, his face is disfigured.. so, no he won't be an attractive super model under that mask of his..

I don't think you people are aware how badass Nikto is as a character, almost SIMILAR as Ghost who's in the military for the same reason as everybody else, to risk their life.

Although judging by Nikto's voice lines, he doesn't care who he's killing..if it were up to him, if his teammates serve him zero purpose he'd care less if they die..(after all, you're just a target..) but being a professional, he can't allow that to happen to his teammates

If you look up closely, Nikto wears a military uniform that is different from everyone else with MP-0 written on it. Now if you don't know, MP stands for Military Police (enforcement agencies connected with, or part of, the military of a state.) and zero next to it meaning "nothing" and this is important which is what Nikto refers himself as..

Yeah so about that..

I have a theory about Nikto's nickname

After being captured and brutally tortured with whatever sick tendency mister Z had in store for him. It was Mister Z that couldn't really get much Information about Andre.

They would start torturing him while repeating to Andre that he's nothing, he's no one, what he is is nothing but what he is is everything. Those words play in the back of his head and they never seen to go away.

(This is extremely relevant cause Mister Z tried to get to know a bit of Andre by looking through some research come to find his citizenship and language are censored making him a nobody. Keep in mind, if he found any information about Andre viewing from personal life etc. it will be used as blackmail..)

After recovering his scars and taken to therapy after 7 years he was diagnosed with DID

NOW moving on to the DID part

(What I said about the fact that people overlook Nikto's disorder, I mean it..

Some don't really write about his disorder which is fine but when someone does it gets messy. )

Alters aren't easy to deal with, it's actually gonna haunt you till the day that you die cause there's no cure for it. And in Nikto's case it's from PTSD and Nikto is very aware of his alters..

Let me tell you how Nikto's disorder affects him. Switching can be consensual, forced or triggered, Nikto values silence as much as the next person cause he's dealing with much inside his head already. The kind of guy that would "watch TV" while dissociating with a 100 yard glare with very slow blinking and a slight headache..

There are times where his personalities would correct him when hes referring to himself (example: I'm up..(his personality correctes him) WE'RE up..)

"He made us do this" (and other voice lines I can't recall..)

Maybe cut bits of an apple with a knife and eat it while watching TV..

He has medication prescribed for him but he didn't wanna depend on medications cause they're just drugs..they're nothing to him but just drugs..

He has dissociative amnesia too, sometimes he would wander around confused maybe even annoyed. The amnesia appears to be caused by traumatic or stressful experiences endured or witnessed..Although the forgotten information may be inaccessible to consciousness, it sometimes continues to influence behavior

Like I said he likes quiet people, someone who doesn't waste their air on small talk..

Example; don't really talk to him about the weather, unless you have something interesting to say but if the conversation is gonna go nowhere , don't talk..he finds that a waste of time

People assume just because he's Russian that he likes vodka, he doesn't like vodka...-He doesn't like any alcoholic beverage cause it makes his problems a lot worse,...maybe If you were lending him some as an offering, he'll take it but he has SOME self control, he's okay with coffee, though..

It's relevant cause he stays awake at late hours since he finds it difficult to sleep, he'll stay up late with no music, nothing, just a silent room. It doesn't matter if he tries the military tactic where you just close your eyes and turn off your thoughts, it's very different when you have voices screaming inside your head...

Despite everything he's still intelligent, so being smart + strength + sharp reflexes and you got yourself a criminal

Death doesn't phase him, but to him death is like sleeping, he's not scared of death considering that he's been through hell those past few months.

He likes the simple things, don't complicate anything..because he's quick with catching an attitude..be blunt and forward and stumble over your words..

Nikto shows confidence in the battlefield,just like König, except he has a high rush of adrenaline and will laugh at the enemies death.

Fun fact: in this one comic Price calls Nikto "psycho"

And it's without a doubt that he is one.., a sadistic, sociopathic, psychopath

After splitting, his alters can and will get more aggressive and do more harm and damage to others cause they're doing the most at protecting the host.. (depending on the alter, some wanna protect him while some wanna hurt him)

Oh by the way about the intelligence part, I mean he has a good good memory with remembering faces..

He doesn't like people looking at him funny, he'll get angry really fast and annoyed at the same time.., he won't show hesitation when it comes to approaching you and asking you what are you looking at (it's like trying to avoid eye contact with a homeless man Infront of a store, that's how scared you would be)

He's slow with jokes or any form of humor that you throw at him??? You'll be excited to tell him a joke, and when you do he just looks at you and tells you never to do that again..,or just straight up tell you he doesn't get it...??? and probably trying to explain it either he gets it or not he'll still tell you that it's not funny

He doesn't argue, or he does? Arguing with him will costs you avoiding getting objects thrown at you so you can get out of his sight..tragic, now you have a teammate that hates your guts and won't apologize for it.

[jaytalking]

Trying to force myself to finish this so it can stop haunting my dreams.

[seijorhi]

the idea of oikawa not being ready when he meets his soulmate.

it isn't that he thinks you're not good enough, not pretty enough, not right for him, it's just that oikawa wasn't expecting to find you so soon.

soulmates are forever, you'll be there waiting for him when all's said and done, but his career in volleyball – it won't be. he's young, fit and hungry for it; in his absolute prime, but if he doesn't put in the effort now, give it everything, 100% of what he has... it'll slip right through his fingers.

he can't risk that.

there's a strange sort of desperation that tugs at his chest when he tries to explain, to get you to understand it. it's a sacrifice you'll both be making for the sake of the career he's dreamed of his whole life.

the way your smile slowly slips away when you realise he's not asking for you to be patient and give him grace when his focus is more on volleyball than you, he's saying he can't have you around at all, because you will distract him.

he'd lose himself in you.

it's not forever, he stresses, only a little while. you're perfect, and in a year or two when he's more settled in his role, the starting setter on the right team, heading to the championships, he'll be there to give you everything you deserve. no – more. he'll make it up to you, all he's asking for (but he's not really asking, is he) is a bit of time and space.

the light dims in your eyes, a strange, glassy look taking over, and slowly, so fucking slowly, you pull your hands from his, let them fall weakly to your side. it takes a monumental effort to not snatch them back up.

'yeah, okay.'

the expression on your face is all wrong, your voice almost robotic, but oikawa knows it's the right thing. you'll forgive him, because that's what soulmates do. you'll forgive him and then fall even more in love with him and oikawa will spend every damn day showering you in the love and affection he can. he'll drown you in it.

just give him this. let him give everything to volleyball, before he shares himself with you.

—

you're a little too good at it.

it's harder than he expected, going no contact. he was the one who wanted it – needed it, really, for this to work – but there'd been a small part of him that sort of hoped you'd ignore what he wanted and reach out anyway. he'd imagined sneaking a quick peek at his phone during a water break to see a message from you, something simple, casual, a 'hope things are good!' or 'i caught some of the game last week'. was it unfair of him to want you keeping track of him? to see how far he'd come in the days, weeks, months since he'd asked for time?

it's like an itch under his skin, and it grows. a few of his new teammates have met their soulmates, carry the marks to show for it. they're all smug as fuck about it, but the thing is whenever their soulmates are watching from the stands, they play with a different kind of fire. they're better. envy burns watching them celebrate afterwards, all hungry kisses and smiles too fucking big.

he knows you'd be there too if you could. you'd be there every damn game, all of their practices too, cheering him on. his biggest fan.

it's an ache. he goes home to an empty apartment, better than the one he had when he met you, in a nicer part of town, but no less lifeless. there's no one to welcome him home, to wrap him up in a hug, kiss him how he likes and soothe away the days stresses. no one to warm his bed, no other pussy'll ever be as tempting as yours.

i miss you.

i'm thinking of you.

would it kill you to break his rules and reach out every now and then? to give him some kind of sign that this distance was driving you half as crazy as it was him?

are you trying to punish him?

it occurs to him that you probably don't have his phone number. it shouldn't have stopped you, because it wouldn't've stopped him.

—

the first time he tries to follow your instagram you block his account.

it's irritating, until he remembers that you're probably trying to abide by his rules. he can't exactly get mad at you for that, tries not to, and instead does what any sane man missing his soulmate would do; creates a fake account, steals a picture from one of his sister's friends and uses that as his profile pic – even goes so far as to follow a bunch of your friends’ accounts too, just so it doesn't look suspicious or weird when he follows you too.

and for a little while, it's enough. he can see what you're up to, who you're hanging out with, where you're going. he'll watch all your stories, your friends’ stories, just for a few seconds of you.

(maybe strokes his cock to a few of them, cums in his sheets gasping your name.)

you're being patient, he's being good, it's only for a few more months, he can last a little longer–

there's a new post on your insta, a snap of you and some asshole with his arm wrapped around your waist, your lips pressed to his cheek.

'Happy six months, love you a little more every day!'

[petew21-blog]

Bodysitting gone wrong

I thought that the site had only verified sitters. Imagine my surprise when I found out my body had disappeared. He didn't answer any of my calls and even blocked me ony the Bodysitting site. I contacted the support, but they said they need some proof of violation of the contract.

Let me just make it clear to you. I am a manager for a big company. My work life is stressful as it is. Me and my wife just had our first baby and I swear I love them both, but I just can't stand it. I needed to get some rest for a while. Until my colleague suggested a Bodysitting site. Where verified strangers can agree to swap life with you for some financial ammount and pretend to be you. You either continue their life or if you pay up you can do whatever you want. Which was exactly what I wanted.

I set up a profile a submitted my photo. Because of my muscular torso and probably even the dick size and wife I mentioned, the request kept flowing in.

I eventually choose Rick here. He was young, handsome and even here in the same city, so if anything happened I could always come by. We had a whole conversation where he would ask me details about my life, work, wife everything. He really wanted to be good as me.

The swap was instant. I was suddenly in a small apartement on the edge of the city.

I think I chose perfectly. I can even get a date in this body.

As I said before, I really love my life. But we haven't had sex for such a long time. You have to understand.

Back to present

I got a call of thepossible whereabouts of the location of my body. Yeah, I have to be honest. I was horrified when I arrived there. The place was a gay club. But not one of those "sweet" bars. But a pub for those leather fuckers.

I entered and all eyes were on me. Fuck, I didn't realise that this kid is exactly who they want.

But they I saw my body coming out of the bathroom. I wouldn't almost recognise it if it weren't for the beard.

"What the hell have you done?!?"

"Oh hey, that's a face I didn't expect to see so soon. Want something to drink?"

"No, I want you to explain to my why you did everythig we agreed not to do. You got me tatooed, got my nipples pierced and please tell me that's not a mohawk under that hat?"

"You know what, you don't have to worry about that anymore. I know how you were unhappy with your life, so I decied to give you a present. You can keep the body. Great right?"

"What do you mean keep the body? What have you done with my life?"

"Well. Your wife kind of figured out I'm not you the second night after she caught me in the shower fingering your butt. I explained to her and I think you shouldn't get near her any time soon. Anyway none of this matters. I deleted the profile, so there is no going back if there aren't both of the original profiles that made the deal."

"I'm gonna kill you!" I jumped at him, but in a second I was pressed against the wall with a hand on my neck.

"Look, either you leave and nothing happens to you. Or me and the boys here can show why not to threaten any of us. So, what you wanna do?"

I obviously left. What was I suppose to do? He would beat me up, rape me or even kill me. I contacted the support and even their number was blocked now. Amazing. I hope my wife is into twinks

[livingformintyoongi]

free use roommates/fwb??? Jungkook and yn 🫠

He gets home after a stressful day at work and goes to her bedroom.

While she's laying in bed just scrolling through TikTok he lifts her shirt up, no bra, and starts sucking on her big tits while she keeps scrolling like it's nothing (I mean she enjoys it but she doesn't get weirded out by that).

Just no explanation, she understands he had a rough day at work and lets him have his way sucking and playing with her tits and fucking her, because he would let her do the same with him.

They might be talking about what went wrong at work, how was her day... just casual conversations! After sucking - and playing with her nipples for a while, he fucks her (raw) doggy style and cums inside.

Friend-to-friend support

a/n: It's my first time doing free use, I hope I did it right. I hope it was to your liking, and that you enjoyed it. warnings: The request says it all, I did not add anything else. wc: 1.9k taglist: @thunderg @minjianhyung @queenv1997 @yoongtism @lizzymizzy-blogg @superbbananananana @drpepperobsessed @themwordsblog @taekritimin123 @bluecloudss

“Rough day?” you muttered, feeling Jungkook's weight fall on your chest. You just wrapped your arms around his neck, holding your phone above his head. 

“Yes” he murmured between your breasts, lightly inhaling your scent. He let out a heavy sigh, trying to relax his tense shoulder muscles. “I'm tired, frustrated and very upset.”

“Did you fight with Jimin again?” you looked away from your phone for barely a second, only to see your friend slip his hand under your shirt. You were quite aware of his intentions, so you didn't have much of a reaction to it either. Jungkook, on the other hand, was quite surprised to notice that you weren't wearing anything underneath.

“You didn't wear a bra tonight?” his big bright eyes locked onto yours, he looked so cute excited. 

“No, it was annoying, why?” your screen mirrored the video of a guy you'd never seen before, but he seemed to be talking about random space data. You found it interesting, so you left it until the end.

“Can I play with them?” he murmured, running his hands up to the level of your ribs, barely brushing his fingertips across the skin under your breasts. It was no secret Jungkook's obsession with your bust. Every day, ever since you started having this kind of “more than friends” relationship he would play with your breasts, squeezing them, kissing them, licking them, sometimes he didn't even do it in a sexual way, they just... helped him de-stress. Besides, according to him, they were much more comfortable than his pillow.

“If you want” you kept watching the videos of the guy you had just found, but this time you put on one that had to do with the sea and its mysterious and terrifying depths. You barely let out a moan as you felt Jungkook's hands squeeze your breasts.

“Thank you, you're the best” he laughed softly, lifting your shirt until it was completely wrinkled under your collar. His lips soon moved to your nipples, licking and biting one as he pulled and squeezed the other, his free hand traveled to your hips. He let out a moan of satisfaction, thoroughly enjoying the feel of your hard swollen button on his tongue.

“You hadn't answered my question” you mumbled, concentrating on how stupidly interesting the account you had just found was becoming. 

“Yeah, we fought again, I hate fighting with him” he sighed, smiling as he noticed how your nipples hardened even more, “but it's okay, we always talk the next day when we fight, maybe tomorrow I'll stop by his apartment so we can talk” he placed his lips in the center, right where your breasts seemed to meet. He licked and kissed that little bit of skin until it was completely red. “I love how pretty your skin looks when I mark it.”

“You do? I guess I hadn't noticed” you laughed softly, watching as he tried to bite as much of the flesh off your left breast as he could.

“Your breasts are so pretty too” he smiled slightly, taking both between his hands to press them against the other, giving both mounds kisses as he hummed contentedly. He liked it when you were willing to do whatever he wanted with them. “I love them.”

“Yes, Jungkook, I know,” you rolled your eyes with a smile, feeling an electric current in your back after he buried his teeth around your nipple, tugging at it carelessly. “Careful, animal.”

“Sorry, I got excited,” he looked at you apologetically, pausing just a few seconds only to return to his work from before, but this time much more carefully.

You nodded, bringing one of your hands to his hair, fiddling with it as he continued his work and you continued to watch more videos on your phone absentmindedly.

More than thirty minutes had passed, yes, thirty, and Jungkook had never stopped licking, kissing and biting your nipples. On more than one occasion you had let out a sigh or gasp, and by this point you were wet enough to be able to fuck him without any problem. Still, you were too focused on how a girl was trying to clean a carpet that looked like it had come out of hell itself. You had no idea how it had gotten into such a deplorable state, but it was quite amusing to watch it being cleaned.

“Y/N?” he asked coyly, looking at you with his oh-so-characteristic bambi eyes that you loved so much. You hummed in response, still not letting go of the dirt coming out of the carpet. “Can I fuck you?”

You watched him out of the corner of your eye, noticing his labored breathing, his red cheeks and his adam's apple bobbing up and down as he swallowed. You had felt the occasional loud movement he made that moved the bed, but you hadn't realized it was him trying to relieve his erection until this very moment. 

“Sure, no problem” you turned your full attention back to the video, hearing hundreds of “thank you's” from Jungkook. His firm hands grabbed your hips and turned you around, making you stand with your back to him. “Oh, by the way, your brother called today, he said he wanted you to go visit him.” 

“Really? He called here? I didn't have any missed calls on my cell phone” he mumbled, pulling down your athletic shorts so he could leave your middle exposed. He licked his lips at the wetness in your underwear. “Did you tell him I was busy?”

“Well, technically yes you were” you moaned softly as you felt his tip brush your entrance through the thin fabric of clothing, “don't you remember? You went to take a shower, left your cell phone on the bed, your ringtone was too annoying, so I was forced to answer it.”

“Sure” he murmured, pushing aside your underwear, pressing his tip against your hole. He seemed to want to tease you, pulling out and pressing his cock against you again. You'd be lying if I said it didn't irritate you. “Hey, wait, my ringtone rocks.”

You were going to laugh at his comment, but just as you opened your mouth he shoved his member inside you. It didn't hurt like the first few times, you were starting to get used to his size, but that didn't take away from the fact that it felt strange every time he was inside.

“Your ringtone is a baby's cry with the fucking autotune set over it, Jungkook, it's horrible” you snorted as you realized you couldn't keep watching videos in this position. Jungkook's thrusts were making you move along with him and, consequently, the video was moving as well. It made you too dizzy.

“It's harmonious” he said with a chuckle, grabbing your hips so he could quicken his pace. He couldn't help but watch as you settled your phone against the pillows, playing some sort of compilation of videos about thorough cleaning of stuffed animals that looked like anything but stuffed animals.

“No, it's irritating” you said, trying not to moan too loudly, you'd had problems with the neighbors in the past, you weren't about to listen to them berate you again. 

Jungkook moved down until his chest pressed against your back, his hands returning to your breasts as he shamelessly played with them. He left several kisses scattered along your back, smiling at the sight of your tattoo under your neck. He loved the way it looked on you.

“I love being inside you, you're so warm, so tight, and all just for me... it feels even better after thinking about it” he whispered near the shell of your ear, leaving a soft kiss behind your ear. He growled softly as he felt you tighten around him.

“I didn't think you were this sensitive, Jungkook” you murmured, your attention completely on the video, or so it seemed. You were starting to feel your stomach shrinking more and more, and your brain seemed further and further away from functioning normally. 

“Let me be, it feels good to show myself as I am with you” he chuckled, going faster and faster. His nails barely burying themselves into the flesh of your hips as he fucked your pussy with the sole intention of making you come. Your pleasure was his pleasure, that was a fact, he couldn't come if you didn't first.

“It's okay, I didn't mean it in a bad way, I like it when you get like this, it's tender” you swallowed saliva, grabbing the sheet beneath you only to cling to it discreetly. It was hard to stay conscious when Jungkook seemed so determined to fuck you until you were in fucking heaven. Every night with him was like that really....

“Thank you, it means a lot to me” he whispered against your neck, lowering his hand to your clit, letting his fingers play with it as he pleased, “and you definitely deserve a treat from me.”

You laughed, resting your forehead on the bed, “I deserve a prize?”.

“Yep” he smiled, marking your neck, “you're very good to me, it's the least”, his fingers started to move faster and his lunges were starting to get more and more accurate. You had understood what he meant, and you knew he knew your body well enough to know which spot to hit so he could completely disconnect you.

And you were absolutely right.

Almost instantly after you thought of that, Jungkook's head hit your G-spot in the most exquisite way possible. You had to bite your lower lip to keep from screaming. 

“You're so tight... will you come soon?” he whispered, starting to move more sloppily than before. 

You just nodded in response, completely refusing to open your mouth. You had to control yourself. 

“Good, me too” he smiled against your head, moving his hips so hard against yours that your legs ended up giving way and falling against the mattress. “Can I do it inside? Please?”

“Y-yes, go ahead” you murmured, feeling the knot in your stomach tighten tighter and tighter,

“Thank you, thank you so much, God, you're amazing” he growled against your ear, pounding your G-spot until he felt you cum all around him, dripping down to his fingers that were still taking care of your clit. It wasn't until that moment that he let his cum spurt out and spread inside you, staying inside you for a few seconds, giving strong but long thrusts until he was completely empty.

He leaned against your back for a few minutes, just until his breathing was fully regulated. He pulled out of you once he felt he could move without shaking completely. He fixed your clothes, letting his cum remain inside you, then took it upon himself to find your shorts and carefully put them on you again.

“Come here” he murmured, turning you around so he could fix your shirt, “ready, good as new” he chuckled, laying down on top of you, letting your breasts be under his head to use as a pillow. “Are you going to keep looking at your phone?”.

“If you want we can watch a movie.” you looked sideways at him, gently stroking his hair.”

“Right answer, this is exactly why you're my best friend” he gave you his trademark bunny smile as he grabbed the remote from the nightstand and turned on the TV, “let's watch Iron Man.”

“Again?” you looked at the screen, laughing. Jungkook's arms wrapped around your waist protectively.

“Yeah, it's the best movie in the universe.”

“Fine, whatever the boss says” you replied with a smirk, settling in to watch your friend's favorite movie for the thousandth time. 

Masterlist.

[yuri-is-online]

Random JadeYuu scenarios because I also have no self control:

Earth and Twst have completely different species of mushrooms and Yuu tells him about earth mushrooms and then they try to cross breed different types of mushrooms to get this One Really Cool Mushroom from Yuus world

Similarly, Yuu tells jade about the Himalayan mountains and Mt Everest (I know a weird amount if Mt Everst lore)

Jazz band! Maybe there's a style of jazz that only exists in twst or on earth and they just combine them to get a whole new jazz! Like cyber jazz or something (That's actually a newly invented genre irl)

Visiting the coral sea and Yuu just starts trying to find old ocean fossils like a fucking nerd

Visiting the coral sea and Yuus trying to figure out why Jade is glowing like the fish equivalent if a glow stick

They go to a rave. Idk they just do shrooms and go to a rave in scarabia. Ft high clingy Jade

Silently courting Jade and watching him flip out

Teaching him how to drive (he cannot)

I love jadeyuu, getting random jadeyuu brainrot increases my lifespan... probably... i think...

I think this is such a cute idea. Apparently our world has deep sea mushrooms so I think it would be very cute of JadeYuu to go diving looking for Twisted Wonderland's equivalent. I also really like the idea of them trying to research how to crossbreed mushrooms for completely wholesome and mundane reason but ending up with a bunch of information on how to grow psychedelics. This is fine by them too.

Jade would have such a silly painfully in love face while Yuu talks about the mountains of their world. He memorizes every word you say and kisses you painfully slowly afterwords, he really loves when you tell him things about your world that make him want to see it. (Mt. Everest makes me sad because all I really know about it is how tourism has been fucking things up for it.)

I really love jazz music ( ˘▾˘)~ and the idea of music evolving in a different way in different worlds is not something that I think is too far fetched, music is influenced by the culture around it and the Coral Sea is super different from anything in Yuu's world. Jade would really enjoy playing music with Yuu, I think he would feel like it would help him understand them better.

Floyd would find this so funny. He already makes fun of you on the log in screen for collecting random junk, and now you are grabbing random sea shit too? This is hilarious. Even funnier that Jade gets super defensive of you and tries to help you pick out the nicest things to bring back to the surface. Don't listen to him pearl there really is no accounting for taste these days.

( ` ꒳ ´ )✧ hehe Jade can control his facial expressions but he cannot control his body's mating signals. He's literally glowing with happiness at having you here, under the sea, all to himself, and so... soft looking. Vulnerable even, so why is he the one breathing heavy and feeling faint? You're unbearably close and so painfully gentle with him as you trace the light down from his shoulder to his chest... come on now, be a bit bolder and go deeper, won't you? (his smile is all teeth and he's literally shaking, which is only worrying Yuu more)

I'm just picturing Jade glued to Yuu's side, really touchy and so honed in on you he's forgotten that you are technically in public. He's saying absolutely filthy things... at least you think he is. He's kind of mumbling and the music is really loud, but you know where his hands are going... maybe you should get out of here before Jamil kills you.

You hand Jade a handmade bracelet and watch him have the most stressed out smile as he tries to determine if you want him or want him while he tries to not make it too obvious which one he wants. You know. You know which one he wants everyone does he is so not slick.

Yeah he refers to something as a "dilly of a pickle" his ass can't drive. I bet he gets horrible motion sickness when riding in cars, similar to how he is with roller coasters in the Playful Land event. He still wants to learn how so he can helpfully insist on driving Azul somewhere (he wants to watch him throw up.)

[neptunedivine]

astro observations pt. ii

hi! I hope you’re doing well! I know it's been a while. I have a lot of things I wanna talk about. But for now, here are some observations I've noted since I've been gone. I hope you enjoy the read!

mutable signs and intelligence ✧ ALL MUTABLE PLACEMENTS SHOULD BE KNOWN FOR THEIR INTELLIGENCE. Since Virgo and Gemini are both ruled by mercury, I feel like this is a given. Sagittarius rules the 9H which controls higher education, so the same thing can be said for them. But then people throw Pisces under the bus…as if Virgo isn’t their sister sign. I feel like people see sister signs as opposites of each other, but in reality, they have their sister’s traits in subtlety.

As a Pisces sun and mercury myself, I understand the anxiety my Virgo homies get, it’s f*cking intense. But will I ever feel it full throttle? I don’t think so and I’m thankful for it.

But yeah, Pisces placements are not airheads, their smart too. I just think their intelligence is out of the ordinary or just not palatable like the other signs.

9H suns ✧ Kind of an addendum to my last bullet, but a lot of 9H and 12H sun celebrities are really smart. I’ve noticed this with Kendrick Lamar because he’s a 9H sun (in Gemini @ 9° -- damn), and he’s considered a conscious rapper (a subgenre of hip-hop that focuses on creating awareness and imparting knowledge). When I think of him, his words always have meaning, they’re not said just because. The same thing can be said about SZA (9H Scorpio sun @ 16°) and Frank Ocean (12H Scorpio sun 4°).

I'm noticing that they're both Scorpio suns at a Cancer degree, I might investigate that more in the future.

When they put out a project, I get annoyed when people immediately have a response (in all I think I get annoyed when this happens to any long-awaited album), because with the lyricism they have, let the words marinate. Their words are never just face value, there's always a deeper meaning.

SZA is also just smart period. She went on this little biology rant a couple of weeks ago. I was shocked but I loved it. Idk sometimes I forget that celebrities have other traits because they choose what they present to their audience and a lot of the time that isn’t intelligence.

✧ Do any other Pisces mercuries talk in funny voices or accents a lot? Like an unhealthy amount? Just me? Okay.

✧ Undeveloped Pisces placements want yes men to their delusions.

LGBTQIA+ ✧ Having mutable + Aquarius Venus/Mars placements and/or aspects could be an indicator of identifying as part of the LGBTQIA+ community. Mutable placements are used to changing their mind a lot, so when it comes to who they’re interested in, they might not have a fixed answer. With aqua placements, they’re not used to sticking to the traditional. So going against the grain with who they’re romantically/sexually involved with is a common manifestation.

mars-jupiter and clumsiness ✧ Those with Mars-Jupiter aspects can be clumsy. Maybe because Mars can rule the physical body and Jupiter expands, they may be overestimating their range of motion.

aries/1H mars and headaches ✧ These placements can be prone to headaches, yes because Mars rules the physical body and anger, and Aries rules the head. But you guys are also quick to anger, so you kind of set yourself up for it. Breathe please, I don’t like seeing you stressed out babes.

aries/scorpio placements and tattoos ✧ Speaking of Aries placements, Aries and Scorpio placements, in general, could like tattoos, whether they want some themselves, have them, or just like the look of them. I feel like Venus and Mars placements are attracted to those who have tattoos, while Mercury placements could have the desire to tattoo people/become tattoo artists. If you have Aries/Scoripo in your midheaven, this could be a good career for you!

that’s all for now! I hope you enjoyed the post, see you later!

[strawberrysodaslut]

idk if you can do this but can you do a poly!marauders x gn!reader, and the boys’ reactions when yn wears a binder one day.

i'm not trans nor have i ever worn a binder, so i hope this is an accurate portrayal!! feel free to correct me on anything i've messed up.

Getting a binder was a long time coming. After months of research, hesitations and all the time spent waiting, going to the store and getting one, you never thought wearing something to bind would make you feel so damn free. Finally, understanding what people meant when you heard about gender euphoria.

You hadn’t told the boys about your latest purchase. In fact, you hadn’t brought up the concept to them. Not that they hadn’t been supportive of you, they really were. In a world of magic, pronouns were something that hardly needed grasping, and they would correct anyone who messed up politely, sending you a soft smile as they did. But- you couldn’t help but be anxious about them finding out. What if this was too much? What if they get freaked out?

So, you kept your binder to yourself.

At first, you didn’t think they had noticed. You wore looser clothes or sports bras earlier, so it probably wasn’t as big of a difference to others. It wasn’t until dinner that night where you noticed Sirius staring at you from across the table.

“What?” You said, chomping down on a bread roll to hide the way self conciousness ebbed in your chest.

Sirius squinted his eyes, looking like James when he tries to read without his glasses. “You look different.” He says. “Did you do something to your face?”

James laughs from next to you. “Did they do something to their face? What kind of question is that, Padfoot?”

“Well, I don’t know!” Sirius exclaims, “Admit it though Prongs, something about them is different!���

You find it hard to not instinctively crawl under the table to hide. So you curl in on yourself, pressing your chin to your chest to calm the heat across your cheeks. As if he can sense your anxiety, Remus places his hand on your shoulder.

“Guys stop.” He says, light concern lacing his voice, but he’s clearly trying to hide it. “Obviously they’re just relaxed now that the holidays are coming, isn’t that right?” He says to you, giving you a slight smirk and raise of his eyebrows that only happen during his most devious pranks. ‘go with this’, he silently urges you.

You smile, nodding your head. “Yeah, I’m glad classes are almost over.”

“Well,” Sirius starts, “We should have holidays more often then. Haven’t seen you this confident in- I don’t even know.”

“I’ll start the petition!” James pipes.

You smile, glad to be supported by your boys, but still relieved that your secret remains yours.

Little did you know later that night, the boys had a plan to throw a movie night with you in the common room. So at nighttime, when you had changed out of your binder so you wouldn’t sleep in it, James surprised you by barging into your room.

“Oi! It’s movie time- oh sorry.” James said, cutting himself off to cover his eyes as you put on your sweatshirt.

Remus followed him, quickly closing his eyes and turning around when he saw you, “Jeez Prongs! They’re changing!” He scolded.

“I know! That’s why I’m…” He trails off, gesturing to the hand that’s covering his eye- going completely unnoticed to Remus with his eyes shut tight.

You shake your head, a soft giggle escaping from your lips. God, they’re dramatic. “It’s okay guys, don’t stress.” You throw your sweatshirt over your head. “Nothing you haven’t seen before.”

James makes a soft grunt, before removing the hand from his eyes and taking you in. “Well, sorry again.” He says. His eyes slowly drift behind you to something on your bed, and tilts his head. “Hey what’s that?”

You almost jump, turning behind you to see your binder laid out on your bed, ready to be put away. You shudder a deep breath before trying your best to gesture nonchalantly. “It’s uh-” It’s hard not to cringe at how your voice trembles. Okay, nonchalant isn’t working. So you instead opt to be candid. “It’s my binder.”

James looks between you and the binder, his brows furrowed. “Binder…?” He questions before his eyes go wide. He paces towards you in a frenzy. “You’re not binding your magic, are you? Listen, you shoul-”

A giggle almost slips out again as you interrupt him before he explodes, “No Prongs! It’s for my chest. It binds my chest.”

Despite the reassurance that no, you were not binding your magic, James doesn’t look any less confused. If anything, he looked even more. “Why would you want to bind your chest?” He asks, his brows furrowing as he makes his way from you to the binder.

Candid, you remind yourself. You’re being candid. “So it would be flatter.” You say.

A beat passes before James replies, still looking down at the material.

“Oh.” “Oh?” You ask. Your heart thumping in your chest with anticipation.

He makes a small squeak as he turns back to you, “I-I just didn’t realise that was something you worried about.” He says, his voice sympathetic but laced with concern. “It’s not…” He pauses, “Is this where we’re supposed to say something to make you feel better? Because you don’t have to do that for other people you know...”

“No, I get that.” You say, a small smile making its way to your face. “This isn’t for other people, it’s for me. I’m more comfortable with myself when I wear it.” You gesture to the binder, as if it hasn’t been the subject of the past couple of minutes.

With that, James’ whole demeanour changes. The tension in his body disappears as he smiles wide. “Well then, we’re thrilled for you. Aren’t we moony?” He says, nudging Remus who has just been staring at you since the conversation started.

As if he has just awoken from a nap, Remus startles to attention. “Oh- uh yes! I’m supportive of whatever you choose as long as you're happy.” Remus replies, smiling at you before chuckling “Sorry it’s just- I knew that’s what was different.”

“You staring at their chest are you?” James teases Remus. “Perv.”

“No! I-” He exclaims, a red tint painting his face.

You smile at him, about to reassure the boy, when a crashing sound comes from downstairs before a yell echoes through the hallway. Remus mutters a small ‘fuck’s sake’ as the cause of the noise comes bounding towards your room.

“Sorry gentlemen- gender neutral, of course. The popcorn has burned.” Sirius announces before he’s entered the room, reeking of burnt popcorn with a few pieces lodged in his hair. Sharing James’ nosiness, his eyes quickly fixate on your binder. “Hey, what’s that?”

James scoffs before turning to Sirius. “It’s a binder, Padfoot, and they’re very happy.” He says with pride, his chin lifting. “Catch up.”

Remus’ attention, however, has drifted away from the binder and he asks the real important question, “How the hell do you burn magic popcorn?”

Sirius jumps to the defensive, “Hey! I’m the one who told you not to put me in charge of food!” He says, throwing his hands up. “I’m obviously more suited to the pillow gathering region.”

With a dictionary worth of swear words, Remus stomps down the hall to make some unburnt popcorn. James quickly following behind, arguing why him being the pillow gatherer was the best choice.

With Sirius and you alone, he turns to you. “Hey, it’s cool that you have that now. Reg used to use one a while ago.” He says, before grabbing your hand, “Now, let’s watch some movies on a subpar pillow arrangement.”

You laugh as you both go to follow the other two boys. “Sounds good.” You say, feeling more secure with them than ever. Your binder sitting blissfully on your bed, ready to be used again tomorrow.

poly marauders masterlist

[nectardaddy]

notebook paper | hinata shoyo

chapter fourteen | your mom [ ✎ ]

masterlist

no smau parts in this one.

cw: idk how to say it but that moment when the stress hits you all at once

He couldn't help the small chuckle passing his lips, leaving as a snort as brown eyes tracked scrawled words on a piece of paper. Repeatedly reading over the worksheet he volunteered himself to grade, but stopped at an answer he had found particularly funny. "Is 'deez nuts' the right answer to what can describe an object's motion?" He asked sarcastically through a chuckle.

The woman next to him let out a laugh at his question, "no way they wrote that." Looking over to the worksheet he had in front of him with a silly smile, "oh my god," speaking through a giggle as her eyes caught the answer. "I'll grade that one," she mused, "we can trade. I love writing notes on their papers when they write stupid answers."

They both sat at the kitchen table of her apartment. Papers and colorful pens strewn about and her laptop open to a draft of a lesson plan, long forgotten as she helped the man grade beside her. She slid the paper that was once in front of him towards herself, and gave him the paper she was grading instead. "Oh god, what are you going to write?" Questioning her with laugh, seeing as she had already started writing.

"You'll see," she mused. And he watched as she furiously wrote on the paper in red ink, a smirk pulling at the edges of her lips.

Leaning over to see what the woman was writing, arm brushing over her own as he did, he let out a loud cackle at only the first two words. Boldly written, with an arrow pointing to the very answer he said aloud, "holy shit!" He said within a laugh, "you did not just write your mom!"

Her smirk pulled further into a brighter smile as she finally stopped writing, placing the pen down and looking over to him. Just under the cheeky note, there were parentheses reading: (won't like the grade you're going to get with this answer. Do it over again.) "They think the notes are funny," she shrugged with a chuckle. "Most of the time they'll do it over again, too."

There was a brief moment of pause, barely lasting more than a few seconds but one the man found himself enthralled with. "You really don't know how amazing you are, do you?" Breaking the silence as he thought aloud, looking to her like a moth to a flame. Tracing over every feature of her face as if to memorize it, as to never forget how bewitching she truly was. "You're a really good teacher."

"You're just saying that," brushed off the compliment with a small laugh. Averting her eyes to look back at the worksheet with baited breath.

"No I'm not," he defended. "Majority of these papers are good grades, or at least looks like they're trying. You're teaching it in a way they understand it," he reasoned. "And you do things they think is funny; they obviously like you."

He saw the woman falter, her smile fall slowly as she thought about his words - an impact she never knew was possible. "Yeah," was all she could say before lifting her hands to her face, letting out a loud sigh as she did. Putting her hands to her eyes and dragging down, an exhausted look now taking center stage of her emotions.

He felt his heart plummet, thinking he, somehow, took a misstep with his words. Taking in a version of her he'd never seen in person, but allowing the space all the same. "Hey," trying to draw her attention, "you alright? I didn't mean to upset you, I just thought you needed to hear it."

His question hung for a moment, voice kind and tone nothing but caring, looking over at her with a concern beyond him. "I did," her voice was soft, a crack within her comment that caused his shoulders to drop. Oh fuck I made her cry. "You have no idea how much I did."

He wanted to comfort her, to remedy whatever flood he had caused within her mind; wanted nothing more than to see her smile again rather than look away with watery eyes. So it was a natural instinct for him to gently draw her forward, to pull her cautiously within his arms - to hug her. "I'll tell you every day then," giving her a small, rather anxious, smile. One she didn't see as she closed her eyes, not wanting the man to see the large effect his words had, but hugging him back regardless.

yes the answer and what yn wrote is my experience lmao

if a man doesn't treat you like this LEAVE HIM

suga is freaking out in his room over this interaction. hell yeah he was eavesdropping

hinata got her coffee too on his way there <3

if you want to know the real answer though it's speed and direction (the middle school answer at least)

this chapter was supposed to be funny but turned into feelings idk but I like it a lot more than the original plan

taglist under cut

@muyyie @wyrcan @eggyrocks @eclecticeggknightpsychic @nbcvs

@marzzn @naweirdo @yukii-1 @girlkissersco @yuminako @kunimix

@empress-pug-pug @cherrypieyourface @lvtilzs @punkhazardlaw @localgaytrainwreck

@crownj1min @sereniteav @madiexuberant @st4rdusttx @chizunata

@le000xxgrd @iheartpinky @muskratlove @mollyrolls @cryptictheseus

@theycallmenanamisgirl @jaeminsbuckethat @deluluforcarlos55 @bunninio @jeonsfizz

@causenessus

[forsworned]

hey pookie i saw your requests were open so i thought id drop by with this little nugget

simon x older sister reader who loves her family more than anything but has a weird inner turmoil with them kind of like fiona gallagher style

sort of “as your child im still mad but as a human i forgive you”

possibly military x cop brat, had to step up to raise her siblings and she’s thankful for everything her parents did for them and understands both are traumatized but also has a lot of resentment for the amount of stress and caretaking she did for her parents and her siblings.

really shows with the way she loves simon too. always taking care of him bc it’s the only thing she knows how to do to show someone you love him and it’s exactly what simon thinks he needs, someone to borderline mother him with their affection and caretaking. but he starts to feel almost condescended?? when she won’t let him take care of her. she feels unheard bc she has this feeling, no matter how unjustified, that if she doesn’t do everything herself it won’t get done. only way they know to argue is yelling but after a few really difficult nights they sit down and eventually they start to sort it out

they’re just two traumatized people leaning to love eachother your honor

"How was work today?"

You inquire, chopping the leek on the wooden board before tossing it into the pot. Simon glances over at the dark circles under your eyes, and your hunched stances over the stove before you peer over at him.

"' was fine." He slowly moves closer to you. "Lemme help." He puts his hand over yours and reflexively jerks your hand away from him.

"I'm fine." You practically spit at him. His eyes harden slightly at your reaction. Knowing the past family trauma that you had both been through it was common, but today, Simon's patience is wearing thin.

"You're not fine." He retorts, taking the knife out of your hand. You try yank it back, but he's quicker. "I want to take care of you for once, [name]. Let me. Please."

Simon begging to help you isn't new, but usually, he had given up to avoid confrontation. Today, however, he is not backing down so quickly.

You lip quivers. "If I don't do it—"

"—No one will?" Simon finishes for you. He scoffs, setting the knife down on the counter. You reach for it again and he slides it away further from you. "Tha's a load of horseshit and you know it. 'm not some incompetent fool. I can take care of myself and you."

You avert your gaze to the kitchen tile, letting out a shaky breath as you wipe away the tears pricking at your eyes with the back of your sleeve. "It's all I know how to do." You whisper, hugging yourself. "Ever since Mom and Dad passed..."

You choke on your sobs, and Simon sighs before wrapping his burly arms around you in a comforting hug. His chin rests on the top of your head, and you swallow thickly.

"I know, I know." He rubs your arm. "But we're all grown up now, eh?"

He pulls back to look down at you, and his words make you crack a smile through your tears. "Yeah, we are."

"So stop being so harsh on yourself. Live your life for you, [name]." He stares intently at you, gently jostling you with every word. You nod and rub your eyes again.

"Besides, I know you've got a thing for Johnny and..." He begins, and your cheeks warm at his unexpected words.

He raises his brows at your bashful expression before chuckling.

"I don't!" You protest, crossing your arms, but Simon sees right through you.

"He says he's been dying to tell you—"

"Lalalalala!" You cover your ears with your hands as you run out of the kitchen. He shakes his head as he resumes the cooking you left behind. If it gets you out of taking care of him, he'd do it again and again. The biggest perk? He was telling the truth. So, his plan to get you out of the house is already working.

"Killin two birds with one stone," Simon murmurs to himself, smiling as he stirs the pot.

[sublimecatgalaxy]

would you write something for johanna (thg) x fem!reader where the others (like peeta, katniss, finnick etc.) always see the tough sarcastic sides to her, but then they see her around her gf (reader) whos really soft and gentle like opposites of her and they see that shes johannas soft spot? sorry for the terrible english!

Bestie I love this, let's imagine together that district 13 is fine and not run by a crazy bitch alright? LMAO I love writing non-canon for the hunger games people cuz they can all be together and happy :)

When Johanna and the others were rescued from the capital and we were all reunited, people noticed a difference in her compared to how she was before. She was still herself, witty, with dark humor, beautiful even without her long, silky hair. But there was a new side to her that most people, other than Finnick, never saw.

That's the side that she showed when she's with me.

We met nearly a month after her first games. She was on her victory tour and I was a painter in District two and she would say that I caught her eye from the crowd, so much that she had to find me and ask for my name and an address that she could write to me.

No one would really imagine her as a romantic but damn the girl was good and she swept me off my feet in only a few months. She wrote to me, sure, her last letter coming in right before the quarter quell. When we found out that she would be reaped again and brought back into the place that brought her so much torment- neither of us could comprehend it.

I thought I was never going to see her again.

That was until she had a friend of hers, a peace keeper in my district, sneak me out of my district and into thte capital where I could see her and I did. We spent the night together and that's when she told me about the plan to get Katniss and the others out of the arena. She also informed me of the greatest secret that they were all keeping- Discrict 13 was alive and well and ready to accommodate the pressure and stress of a full revolution.

When I found out that she was taken by the capital, my whole world fell apart. It was probably the only thing that Katniss and I were able to bond over, the fact that our lovers were in the clutches of President Snow and being used as propoganda. It was horrible.

So when it was agreed upon that they would be rescued, I jumped at the opportunity to go with Gale and help them in the process of getting them out of the capital, no matter what it took.

When we finally reunited in the jet, it was like the whole world stopped. As if every piece of me that was missing was finally back in it's right spot, like a missing puzzle piece she was finally back in my arms.

"It's kind of cute that they could do this." Johanna whispers in my ear, watching Finnick and Annie dance around in circles in the middle of a huge, loving crowd. I turn to her with a fond smile and nod, leaning into her the slightest bit as Katniss approaches us with a sarcastic smile on her lips, as always.

"You two look couple-y." She chuckles and I smile, clutching onto Johanna's hand that rests on my thigh and I feel her tense up as if she's taking it personally.

"That's what happens when you're a couple, genius." She snaps with a sarcastic tone and I huff, giving her a gentle bump with my shoulder and she mutters a quiet 'sorry' under her breath.

"I'm just saying, after everything we've been through, it's nice to see you actually act like a nice person." There's a pause for a moment, as if the two of them are finally understanding each other and instead of passive aggression, Johanna responds differently, taking even me off guard.

"Yeah well she brings it out in me like Peeta does with you." My heart warms for a moment as she sends me a small smile, her cheeks blushed in a deep red and her chin dips downward to conceal it.

"That's really sweet actually." Katniss sits beside me with a huff, motioning to the crowds of people in front of us that are cheerfully dancing and singing around the happy couple. "You guys don't dance?"

"I do, she doesn't." I jut my thumb in Johanna's direction but she just laughs and turns to me with an unconvinced look.

"You could convince me but you haven't asked."

"Please dance with me." I nearly immediately beg, standing up out of my chair so I can grab her hands and tug her towards the dancefloor, wanting nothing more than for people to see her happy and loved, especially Finnich given how much he worries for Johanna.

"Yes, ma'am." She sighs and turns to throw a wink at Katniss who just laughs and claps her hands at us.

"Wow, you're whipped."

"Pipe down, Everdeen."

[wetcatspellcaster]

Metapost: "The Ascendent"

**this is a meta for my fic, Pieces Still Stuck in Your Teeth, and NOT a discussion of the BG3 game canon in any way. If you try and make this into a disk-horse, I will BITE you**

(spoilers under the cut for Chapters 1-23 of Pieces Still Stuck in Your Teeth).

So... remember in the Chapter One endnote when I said I was a Spike/Buffy fan first, and a person second? x

･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ

In more seriousness, there was a number of fictional seasonings/ingredients that went into creating what I felt was the villain of a Gothic horror, and what I felt could turn the Ascendent into something that was both 'fixable', and something I enjoyed writing.

Those ingredients were:

Spike and the idea of 'soulless' vampires in the BtVS canon - do I like this conceit of BtVS worldbuilding and how it's used in the show? No. I think it often underlines how bad Whedon is at writing romance. BUT I do think it gives Buffy this free pass for which vampires she can/can't like or adopt, and I needed some of that for my protagonist. I need a 'I can fix him' moment - BtVS has those in fucking SPADES.

Howl's Moving Castle (this one was accidental, I'm still mad at myself but I can't deny it's there) - man conducts magic ritual for power, removing an essential part of himself in the process that needs to be returned

Picture of Dorian Gray (the idea of an exterior staying pristine while something hidden suffers and decays)

Curse of Strahd (the soulless in Barovia, which I mentioned in Chapter 23)

The idea of default moral alignments in D&D. I have a whole chapter arguing against this in my thesis (mostly bc it's often applied to entire races) but I was fascinated by creating a set of circumstances where I feel like a default moral alignment is valid, actually. 7,000 deaths seems like a good set up. I wanted to imagine a being that was trapped within a default moral alignment, and the laws of its very being prevent it from being good no matter what it tries, and it knows that (this kind of creates a feedback loop with the Spike/Buffy stuff)

The parts of the BG3 canon I took and REMADE (I'm stressing this throughout, I was making a horror story and a horror monster your honour):

Astarion conducts the Rite of Profane Ascension with scars on his back, but has to scar Cazador's back personally, suggesting that um... the Rite REALLY SHOULDN'T BE CONDUCTED BY SOMEONE WHO'S GOT THOSE SCARS. Cazador wasn't going to do it that way, is all I'm saying!!

The idea that Ascended!Ending Astarion is a concentrated version of certain traits that have persisted throughout his story - his flirtiness, his understanding of sex as a mechanism and expression of power, his use of a façade as a mask for trauma he refuses to acknowledge.

The lines alluding to dissociation in the brothel foursome, post-Ascension.

The idea that Astarion seduced Tav to survive or protect himself- in my case, because I made the Ascendent empty save for Astarion's survival instinct, the idea that he would gravitate towards Tav as one of his default modes to potentially survive made sense to me - this is why it becomes an obsession.

･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ

For me, when writing, the Ascendent is a few things:

An intensification of vampirism in a different, fucked-up direction. Yeah, A!Astarion, you can walk in sunlight and you can eat and drink and don't need blood. But you are still a hungering maw of emptiness that feels like it will never be whole or close and connected to the living - just now in a wildly different, metaphysical/existential direction! Welcome to depression, alienation, and otherness!

A soulless being, that knows it is soulless - that initially was very happy with its life but then as the years passed, increasingly spends its every waking moment knowing there is something innately wrong with it that it can't seem to shake, no matter how much it engages with life and all the pleasures of life. (see the 'every meal without savour' speech)

A magically literal metaphor for Astarion's dissociation in moments of extreme trauma, up to and including the fight with Cazador - essentially, the moments when there is nothing but a performance or an exterior, because the self/soul are suffering and they cant' come to phone right now

Astarion's survival instinct. As I say in Chapter 23 - Mephistopheles thinks it is an empty body, who's performance is trying to deny the reality of it's own existence. Rosalie, who has a bit more understanding of Astarion, sees that the performance is not just a coping mechanism but one of Astarion's main modes of survival. The Ascendent is Astarion's survival instinct/techniques for endurance, without any soul or person behind them to protect. This is how I tried to tie in the flirty, hypersexual persona and wrap it with a bow.

I wanted a monster that was undeniably scary, and monstrous to me (oh? you can't fit in or be happy no matter what you do and no matter how hard you try, and you think there's something intrinsically off? how's that autism diagnosis going Emma) but that I also felt sympathy and true sorrow for. I needed to have motivations for him chasing after Tav that I could write meaningfully from and sympathise with.

Not only has Astarion used Tav as a life-raft once before, they've also proven to be the most secure thing he's ever clung to. Of course a rabid survival instinct Astarion would become obsessed, and see them as a potential solution to the problem (this was then intensified by Rosalie also being a walking, overbearing moral compass, and having bound him in a contract in the first week of living, accidentally - a lawful good immoveable objects meets a default moral alignment unstoppable force.)

...Because I also wanted that moral alignment spice!! Wizards of the Coast, default moral alignment is fucked up actually!!! Imagine something trying so desperately to be good - literally being bound in a pact and having been told to be good - but the laws of the universe and its very essence are like "nah mate, we kind of want to destroy and annihilate everything, we're neutral evil personified". That's scary!! that's fucked up!! that's what a birth from 7000 deaths gets you!!!

･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ･ﾟ✧

So, now for the actual timeline, for people who aren't interested in my silly musings but mostly just want answers lmfao.

Rosalie makes the decision not to intervene in Cazador's mansion, making it seem like she'll support whatever decision Astarion will make there.

Rite of Profane Ascension happens. Astarion conducts the ritual, rips his own soul from his body, the Ascendent is born with literally zero context. Mephistopheles is fucked in Cania, because a bunch of stuff has just gone wrong.

(oh, by the way, the Ascendent knows Infernal as a default language. Bc it's born from an Infernal rite.)

The Ascendent is now default neutral evil, and feeling some kind of way. Rosalie and him break up. He's supposed to have everything, but the one thing he thought was a done deal - his most stalwart suppporter - just rejected him.

Netherbrain defeat (the Ascendent is not invited. Imagine being an all-powerful, hypersexual survival instinct vampire, and your ex-girlfriend neither wants you for sex, nor your power.)

Rosalie accidentally binds the Ascendent (a soulless devil) in a pact demanding that he never kill anyone, when that's literally what the Ascendent's new existence/new default moral alignment is driving him to do. Then, she fucks off and goes into hiding.

Well. The Ascendent can just get another wizard, to help him learn all of Cazador's secrets to cope [Hemlock is recruited].

The years go by! The Ascendent is doing sooooo well. Everything is great, guys! I'm rich, I'm beautiful, I have lavish parties and lots of sex - why do I feel nothing? I'm a vampire perfected - I have no hunger for blood, I can walk in the sun, I can enjoy all the freedoms of a living, breathing man - why do I feel like I'm starving? Why does everything turn to ashes in my mouth? I have friends - oops, I've sabotaged all those friendships with my innate neutral evil destruction. Why can't I feel anything? What's wrong with me? I'm doing everything right? Why doesn't it feel that way?

Also, I can't kill anything to feel better about it, because my hidden ex-girlfriend bound me in a pact.

In this time, to reflect the gradual degradation of the Ascendent's happiness and it's increasing awareness that it is something Other and innately wrong, the reflection starts going weird. Starts going strange. Starts getting a bit fucked up. Almost as if, when he looks in the mirror and sees a person, *nothing* should be what's there. Imagine being a spawn who couldn't see your reflection, and then a vampire who could see it's reflection, but knows that they're innately empty. Knows there's nothing there. I'd freak out a little bit about it as well tbh, I'd go a bit tooth and claw and elongated jaw about it.

The Ascendent finally admits that's there must be something kinda fucked about it. Life just ain't working out, lads. He starts looking for any and all impossible cures that will help with the malaise in his soul (and that innate essence problem, caused by default moral alignment). These include: more bad decisions, such as a house in Cania bc the Ascendent is hoping he'll feel more at home with devils than he does with mortals. All it does is make him feel more isolated and alone.

But eventually, he settles on two things! - Wish (Hemlock's idea), and Rosalie (the Ascendent's idea). Clearly, we just need Rosalie back! Her leaving is actually what fucked him up in the first place - none of this existential bullshit! She fixed us one, she can fix us again.

But looking for Rosalie hasn't worked out. In order to get a shot at her, the Ascendent goes and bargains for his own soul from Mephistopheles. Mephistopheles, adding a new sheet in excel titled 'what the fuck happens when i give this soulless monster a soul to play with?', agrees and starts tracking his new data.

Obviously, just putting the soul back in yourself will fix you. But the Ascendent, the nothingness living inside Astarion's body, will die. Taking the soul back would erase itself. The Ascendent - who is survival instinct personified - would never do this.

So instead, it starts interviewing and cannibalising the soul. Bc a soul is what it needs, this is the closest it's ever felt to being alive. Bc it's made this all about Rosalie, he thinks he's found his solution. The chase is making him feel alive again. It's true love, lads! not the soul.

Wish auction happens - the Ascendent is beaten to the punch by some unknown (hot) wizard.

This avenue cut off, the Ascendent makes the decision to try and win Rosalie back.

Astarion advises that to make her come back to the Gate, he should murder a bunch of people. Because this comes from the soul, not the soulless devil nothingness, it circumvents the pact.

...The events of Pieces begin!

･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ･ﾟ✧

And finally - the Ascendent tries to destroy Jar!Starion for many reasons in Chapter 19:

The Ascendent knows that it dies, if the soul and the body get reunited (or is that constant high alert survival instinct just no longer needed, because the problem is fixed? you decide.)

The Ascendent values Tav above itself. Tav is going to fix them. Astarion believes he could never fix himself.

Dissociation - that soul isn't me. I'm here, looking at my soul. If I get too close, it'll kill me.

Self-hatred - that soul isn't me. That man made a mistake, and I've had to live with the consequences. He doesn't deserve to live, for what he's made me become.

The knowledge that Rosalie/Tav will only ever want that version of him, not the one that's living and breathing, that sees itself as the most wretched, fucked-up version of itself. So... give them no choice. They have to deal with me and love me at my worst.

And if the Rite didn't work - if the version of the Ascendent walking around isn't the best one, and the one people want... what was it all for? Why does the Ascendent feel like this? Why does it have to suffer?

･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ･ﾟ✧

....And, that's my little meta post! If anyone has any questions about the timeline or any motivations at any points in the fic, I'm obviously more than happy to explain things via ask/comment, as always!

TLDR: I just wanted to make a Gothic horror. I wanted a dark romance, fucked up obsession vampire/mortal dynamic, but I also wanted a situation that was scary for both Astarion and my Tav. I personally think an Astarion who is so dissociated and separate from reality that he feels that in his bones daily, is scary. It's the lingering impact of the traumas the Rite and those 7,000 souls embodied.

I was literally just trying to make it a horror, for everyone involved.

[anyasathenaeum]

Our Father, Who Art In Heaven (98!WW X Reader Smut)

A/N: Hey everybody, I'm baaaaack! It's been a bit of a stressful and busy time, but hopefully you guys can enjoy this. I actually wrote this piece well over a year ago privately (for my dearest and best friend, @vanille-sweet, who has kindly granted me permission to alter and share this work so you can all enjoy it!). Literally nobody asked for this but here, have it anyways. I went with 98!WW here. Please be nice. Warnings: MINORS DNI!, AFAB!Reader (female terms used), smut (lots of it), sacrilege (y'all get nasty in a church), oral (female receiving), P in V sex, penetrative sex, unprotected sex (WRAP IT BEFORE YOU TAP IT, FOLKS), a tiny hint of exhibitionism towards the end, WW has a thing for being called "Father" (does that count as a daddy kink?...), no established relationship

Time on the road was wearing you down.

Slowly but surely, you felt your resilience and your drive to continue beginning to die out. Everything was becoming too much for you to handle. From the chaos of being around Vash, all the people hunting him down and, by extension, you and the others, to just constantly moving from town to town, you found yourself exhausted. Mentally, physically, emotionally, you were drained.

What you hadn't expected was to find solace and a moment of peace in a place you had only stepped foot into maybe once before - a church. It was nothing special - no beautiful stained glass windows, no huge arches, no beautiful, expensive chandeliers. Just a small building with an alter, a confessional, and a bunch of small, wooden pews for those wishing to pray in this tiny town.

You now found yourself sitting in one of those pews, entirely alone in the whole building, left to be with your thoughts and emotions and try to sort yourself out. You sighed heavily, resting your head on the pew in front of you, shutting your eyes tightly as your exhaustion coursed through you.

"Hey, pretty lady, whatcha doing here in the house of the Lord?"

The sudden voice scared the crap out of you, causing you to yelp and jump straight out of your skin, turning to see Wolfwood standing there, smiling coolly as if he hadn't just scared you.

"Oh, Wolfwood, it's just you. You startled me," You replied, letting out a deep breath and lean back against the pew where you were sitting, your gaze going straight up to the ceiling as you answered him, "I'm just... thinking."

Wolfwood didn't say anything as he approached you, sitting directly next to you in the same pew. Once he had been seated, he spoke softly.

"Thinking about what? You don't look too happy, I gotta say. It's not a good look on you, (Y/N)."

You just scoffed and shot him a look, "That's rich, coming from you, Mr. Preacher Man."

That drew a chuckle from the priest, who brought his arm around your shoulders and drew you in close to him, bringing a blush you hoped he wouldn't see to your cheeks.

"Seriously, (Y/N). What's on your mind?"

He spoke softer, his voice gentler than before. Wolfwood always surprised you with how kind he could be - you never anticipated it, for some reason. But right now, you didn't mind one bit. It felt nice, having just one person there with you right now, and Wolfwood seemed like the perfect person to talk to about your troubles.

"I just..." You sighed out, "I'm struggling to keep going on. Constantly being on the run is starting to drain me. I wish I could just... stay somewhere for a little. Forget about life for a moment. You know?"

Wolfwood was smiling down at you softly as you spoke, nodding his head in understanding, "Yeah, I get it. It's a lot. But you're strong, pretty lady. Don't doubt that for a second."

You felt your blush darkening as you looked away from him for a moment, quietly mumbling "Thanks, Wolfwood" in return.

Of course, though, Wolfwood noticed your blush and tilted your head towards him, his fingers under your jaw firm in their motion but somehow still gentle. You felt your heart rate hit the roof as you looked up at him - he was exceptionally handsome. You always knew as much, but now... it felt like you were really seeing him for the first time. His dark skin, his eyes, his curved nose, his muscled figure, his dark hair, everything was suddenly hitting you all at once and the thoughts going through your mind were bordering on unholy for being in such a holy place.

"Ya know... you're pretty much in confessional right now, pretty lady. Got any sins you wanna get off your chest?"

Wolfwood's tone was sultry and gently teasing, his dark eyes scanning your face for signs of a reaction to his comment. You, however, took this as a challenge and decided not to make it easy for him.

"My sins are all I have left in my life, Father," You replied, your own tone dropping and silky smooth as you answered, "I have nothing but my sins to hold onto."

You could see Wolfwood's face changing colour at your answer, and you could see him swallowing hard as he processed your tone and your words. You had succeeded in flustering the priest back just as he had flustered you, and a sense of pride swelled in your chest.

After a few moments, Wolfwood had recovered and immediately took it one step further, bringing his face down close to yours. So close that you could feel his breath fanning across your skin as he spoke.

"Then... why don't I give you something else to hold onto?"

Your eyes widened at what he was insinuating - he couldn't possibly be serious. Could he?

"My, my, Wolfwood... are you suggesting what I think you are? And in a church, no less?"

Your tone was teasing, but you genuinely wanted to know if Wolfwood was seriously asking you if you wanted to sleep with him in a church. You knew that if Wolfwood was even the slightest bit serious in his teasing, you would accept without hesitation. It had been forever since you'd had sex with anybody, and the last time it had been some random stranger in a one-night stand. But Wolfwood... that would be sex to remember.

Wolfwood grinned cheekily at you, bringing himself closer until his lips were mere centimeters away from yours, "What's the point of absolving people of sin if they have no sins to absolve, eh, pretty lady? Makes my job more interesting."

"Oh, so I'm just a job to you, then?" You snapped at him - there was no way you were gonna let him get away with this.

You weren't making it easy for him to get into your pants, regardless of how badly you wanted it. You stood up, scoffing as you walked past him and begun walking towards the alter of the church, pretending to be upset with him to get him riled up.

"Hey, wait, I'm sorry, (Y/N). That's not what I meant, I just-" Wolfwood was explaining as he followed you up to where you stood at the front of the church, "I just meant-"

You couldn't keep it in any longer, bursting into laughter at his attempts to fix the "damage" he had done. The look of confusion and disbelief on his face was worth it, causing you to laugh harder.

"Oh, Wolfwood! Your face!" You were laughing hysterically, almost doubling over from laughing as you heard him grumbling under his breath. Once you recovered from your laughing fit, you turned to Wolfwood and walked up to him, getting all up in his personal space the way he had done with you earlier.

"So... Father... you gonna punish me for my sins?"

Your tone was sultry and silky again, low and seductive as your breath ghosted over his skin. You could see the goosebumps raising across Wolfwood's skin at your words, and you knew then and there you had him hook, line and sinker.

Sure enough, without saying another word, Wolfwood was pressing you up against the wall near the alter of the church, his lips pressing against yours in a passionate, messy, heated kiss. You could feel every muscled plane of Wolfwood's body pressing against yours, your arms coming up to wrap around his neck as you kissed him back hungrily.

"God..."

The whisper that escaped Wolfwood was breathless, as if the kiss and the taste and feeling of you had knocked the wind straight out of him. You just smirked up at him, panting slightly.

"I thought you weren't supposed to use the Lord's name in vain, Father."

The growl that left Wolfwood's throat was beyond primal, and you soon found yourself with his lips pressed against yours once more, his tongue soon exploring your mouth as yours explored his, relishing his taste and the feeling of him against you. His leg nudged yours apart, and you let out a stifled moan into his mouth as his thigh brushed against your clothed core, sending shockwaves of pleasure through your body.

"N-Nicholas," You moaned out, panting more heavily than before, struggling to find words as you felt his thigh continuing to brush against your core.

The smirk on Wolfwood's face was large, and it only grew as he brought his hand down to wrestle your pants off, revealing your underwear and the extremely noticeable wet spot forming on them from your arousal.

"Well, well, well, pretty lady," Wolfwood growled, "Seems somebody's enjoying herself."

"More," You moaned out, not caring of the location anymore - you wanted Wolfwood and you wanted him now, "More, Nicholas, please, more."

"Shhh, (Y/N). Don't you know patience is a virtue?" Wolfwood teased you gently, his fingers beginning to rub circles over your clit through your underwear, drawing more beautiful moans out of you.

"S-Sorry, Father," You replied, a small smile appearing on your lips as a groan escaped from Wolfwood as you spoke the word "Father" - it confirmed your suspicions that Wolfwood got turned on being called as such.

"Good girl," Wolfwood praised you, before kneeling down in front of you.

He slowly but surely pulled your underwear down and off of your body, before lifting one of your legs and letting it rest over his shoulder, raising your leg slightly and exposing your pussy to him, dripping wet from his touch and his taste and his words. The moan Wolfwood let out at the sight of your pussy had you blushing, and then you suddenly heard him mumbling something lowly. It took you a few moments to realize that he was praying.

"N-Nick?" You whined, shifting slightly as you desperately wanted him to touch you, even if only for half a second, but Wolfwood just continued praying until you were whining more and more. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, you heard Wolfwood mumble "Amen", signaling he was done praying.

"What was that?" You asked, looking down at him, your face flushed red as you gazed at the man who was level with your pussy.

A devilishly charming smile appeared on his face as he replied simply, as if stating the most obvious thing in the world, "I was saying grace and giving thanks for the meal I'm about to have."

Your expression became one of confusion, but before you could understand what Wolfwood had meant, Wolfwood leaned forward and immediately begin to eat you out like a starved man.

You almost shrieked at how amazing it felt, your hands burying themselves in the priest's dark hair as he continued to lick your pussy, alternating between licking and sucking and fucking you with his tongue. You had all but lost the ability to form coherent words, the only thing leaving you being moans, high-pitched whines, whimpers and Wolfwood's name on repeat.

"God, (Y/N), you taste incredible," Wolfwood moaned into your pussy, causing your cheeks to heat up and a particularly loud moan to slip from your lips.

You couldn't say anything in response, only bucking your hips so that Wolfwood could fuck you with his tongue a bit deeper, and suck on your clit just a touch harder.

The pressure within you was building, the coil of pleasure tightening more and more until you were right near the edge. As if reading your body and your thoughts, Wolfwood continued to eat you out but then slipped one of his fingers into your pussy, causing you to cry out. The sudden intrusion was welcomed, with you bucking your hips more as you chased your high, moaning louder and louder. Then, to your surprise, you felt Wolfwood moving his finger within you in a "come-hither" motion, grazing over that spongy spot inside you perfectly until you cried out and the coil of pleasure suddenly snapped, your orgasm washing over you in waves, over and over.

Wolfwood didn't move from your pussy, continuing to lick you and eat you out until you were completely down from your orgasm. When he finally withdrew, he was smirking widely, your slick all over his lips and chin, even as he pressed forward and kissed you, causing you to moan loudly as your tasted yourself on his lips and on his tongue. You don't know how, but this man, this priest, was making you feel better than anybody else ever had.

You simply continued to kiss Wolfwood passionately, your hands coming down to fumble with his belt, all but ripping it open and pulling his pants down enough so that you could palm his rock-hard cock. You gasped slightly at the feeling of Wolfwood, and you realized that this man was BIG. You cleared your throat, feeling your cheeks turning a bright red as you spoke up softly.

"Nicholas, a-are you sure you're gonna... fit?"

The smile on Wolfwood's face was big, and you could hear him chuckle as he leaned in for another passionate kiss.

"Don't worry, (Y/N), I think we got you well prepared to take it."

With that, Wolfwood pressed you back into the wall, lifting your leg into the crook of his elbow, stretching you open a bit more so that he could glide his cock over your pussy, letting out a moan as he watched and felt his cock brush against your slick, soft skin. If it was up to him, Wolfwood would've already been fucking you hard. But he knew this was the first time you two were together like this, so he should play nice.

"God, I've wanted you for so long, sweetheart."

You almost missed his words, your eyes widening at the priest's confession, your mind wandering away from the feeling of his cock against your pussy for a moment as you processed that. You just smirked in reply.

"Well, now you have me. Make it good, Wolfwood, and I'll consider doing this with you again."

Not needing to be issued the challenge twice, Wolfwood immediately adjusted himself so that his cockhead caught on your entrance, and in one slow, steady thrust, sheathed himself completely within you.

The cry of his name that left your throat as he did so would forever be engraved in Wolfwood's mind, and it would be something he'd strive to hear again and again for every day for the rest of his life. The feeling of your warm, tight walls clenching down around him was SO much better than he'd envisioned all those times he'd touched himself to the thought of fucking you. This was incomparable.

"O-Oh, God, (Y/N)..."

The broken moan that slipped from Wolfwood's lips made you clench tighter around him, pulling another moan from him in return. He was already so stupidly close to cumming, it was unbelievable. Just the feeling of sliding into you and feeling you around him was enough to get him close to the edge.

On your end, the sting of the stretch of Wolfwood entering you surprised you, causing you to hiss a bit at the feeling - he really was big. You hadn't ever been stretched as much during sex as you were being right now, and it was enough for you to know that you'd definitely want to fuck Wolfwood again and again and again. He just made you feel so full. It was incredible, feeling him pressed up inside you, his cock pressing on all the right places just sitting within you, not even moving yet.

"I-" You hiccupped, trying hard to form words, "You can move, now."

Wolfwood was now the one unable to speak, taking a moment before nodding and pulling himself out of you slowly before thrusting back into you hard. Immediately you moaned, reaching up to wrap your arms around his neck and pulling him down so you could kiss him. You and Wolfwood were moaning into each other's mouths as he fucked you at the alter of the church, with you begging him to move faster, thrust harder as that familiar coil of pleasure began to build within you again, faster than ever before.

"F-Father, I- I'm gonna-" You stuttered, your voice high-pitched and breathless as all you could focus on was the feeling of his cock stretching you out over and over, brushing over that spot deep inside you that drove you closer and closer to the edge.

"Cum for me, (Y/N), cum for me," Wolfwood growled, his hands grabbing your ass with a grip tight enough that you were sure he'd bruise you and slamming your hips forward in time with his thrusts, somehow going even deeper than he was going before.

Just feeling him grip you and manhandle you like that and hearing him growl alongside all the other sensations raging through your body immediately brought you straight over the edge, you crying out Wolfwood's name over and over as you came again, clenching down on him harder than ever before, milking his cock as you came on him.

That feeling of you squeezing him harder, your walls fluttering on his cock brought Wolfwood to the brink in an instant, another broken moan escaping his lips as he thrusted into you a few final times, "I'm cumming, oh, God, (Y/N), I'm cumming!"

You felt Wolfwood thrust into you one final time, all the way to the hilt and a warm feeling bloomed within your abdomen, signaling that Wolfwood had made good on his promise, cumming deep inside you. Both of you were panting hard as he let your leg down, his cock slipping from within you, both of you letting out a moan as he did so.

"O-Oh, my God..." You panted, your legs shaking as you looked at the priest, your eyes shining from the afterglow of your orgasm, "Nicholas, th-that was amazing..."

Wolfwood simply grinned at you as if he hadn't just fucked you better than any other man had before, before pulling his pants back up and getting himself more cleaned up. As you went to put your underwear back on, Wolfwood reached out and slapped your wrist.

"Ah, ah, ah. Leave those off."

You just gave him a confused look as he began to walk towards the entrance of the church, calling out, "What, why? Wolfwood, I can't walk back to the inn with no underwear on."

The priest smirked as he answered, "Yes, you can. Because I hope to sin with you again tonight the minute we get back to the inn. What do you think about that?"

You let out a small laugh, your pussy clenching at the thought of Wolfwood fucking you again tonight, and you could feel the combination of his and your cum beginning to trickle down your thighs. Regardless, you began to follow Wolfwood out of the church, heading back to the inn.

"I think I'm gonna have to actually go to confessional after all this."

And you couldn't have been happier.

[puari-vol]

I was at the club because my friend told me I needed to "get out more" but with the loud music and the people yelling to be heard over it, I just couldn't really get comfortable so I found myself a corner to retreat to. I sipped my water, and tried my best to get used to the atmosphere. Just as I was about to give up and leave, She sits down right next to me

"Hey there, you mind if I sit here?"

"huh? oh t-that's fine"

"Thanks I've had such a long week, work can be sooo stressful you know?"

"Uh yeah"

"You seem nice, do you mind if I vent to you a little bit?"

"um...sure"

she smiled, and I found myself glancing down at my drink, I never was any good with eye contact. She starts talking about her job and I nod along politely, she spoke somewhat softly, so not wanting to be rude I found myself leaning closer to hear her better.

"It's so nice to have nights off like this where I can just relax, you know? I bet you like that, just relaxing, and letting your brain turn off for a little while, right?"

"Yeah..."

"that's right, you're such a good listener, you could just tune me out but you're listening very closely aren't you? I really appreciate that"

"um...no problem"

"you don't seem very relaxed though, Isn't that right?"

"I guess not..."

"It's the noise isn't it? it's loud enough in here to make you dizzy, and the lights are so bright, see over there? the way they're flashing like that, it's so confusing isn't it?"

I found myself looking where she pointed and indeed it was kind of hard to look at. I was blinking a lot and suddenly felt unsteady, I put a hand on the wall to support myself.

"poor, thing you're so dizzy and confused, it's so hard to focus in here isn't it? you want to go outside don't you?

"I uh...yes"

"That's right, some fresh air will help you a long way to relaxing and listening, that's what you want, to relax and listen. don't worry I'll help you out"

she took my by the hand and started pulling me toward the door, it was so strange, I was sure I hadn't had anything to drink, but I felt so lightheaded and wobbly, She nearly had to catch me as I stumbled.

Finally with the doors shut behind us, out in the warm quiet night I felt my head beginning to clear She took me around the side of the building and helped me lean up against the wall, she kept a hand on my shoulder, holding me their gently

"Very good, that's better now, isn't it? so much easier to listen, focus and relax, right?

"Yes...thank you"

"of course, you seemed really stressed, but now I bet you're ready to just relax, listen and turn your brain off for me, aren't you? It's so nice and quiet out here, I bet you feel warm and sleepy don't you?"

I just yawned and She reached up and put a hand on top of my head, and pushed until I was staring straight down at my shoes, eyelids fluttering

"That's right, very good, don't worry about anything right now, just focus on the sound of my voice, you're so close to just dropping and turning your brain off, and it's going to feel soooo good, just relax now, letting my voice fill your head until there's almost nothing else. In a moment you're going to look into my eyes and they're going to be so transfixing and beautiful that you're just going to let the last awake part of yourself drop into them, then I'm going to snap my fingers and you're eyes will close and you're brain will turn off once and for all, understand? say 'yes Mistress'"

"Yes...Mistress"

"Very good"

She put a finger under my chin and tilted my head up. her gorgeous eyes only inches from mine, I looked into them and it felt like I could see forever...and then-

*SNAP*

[allthegothihopgirls]

I love the asexual Bruce Wayne agenda and I totally agree with it. What I want to know though is how Bruce (asexual queen that he his) deals with his hormonal teenage boys?

Cause like Bruce never got the sex talk (I mean his parents died when he was young, and the family Buttler is Not giving his former employers son the sex talk) and that’s fine by Bruce. Cause he’s never felt these ‘urges’ that everyone talks about. Honestly, sex is overrated.

But, Batman prepares for everything. And one thing that people ALWAYS stress about parenting is having to give your kids the sex talk.

I just really want to know about the hijinks like;

Bruce: *Standing forlornly in front of a ‘Sex Ed’ PowerPoint* So, I understand that you probably have no desire for these… urges. That everyone talks about. But the parenting book (and society) decrees that to be a good parent, I need to give my children a proper education on sex.

Dick: *Very much not asexual* Yeah, no thanks dad this really helps!

Bruce: *Bewildered* How???

although the idea of bruce uncomfortably giving his version of a 'talk' is amusing, i don't think he'd give one at all. none of the boys would really give him any reason to, until he gets to tim at least (he's like, the only one i haven't fully projected my asexual agenda onto at this point).

dick's always been very responsible, so when he starts dating, maaaaybe bruce has like, a single thought contemplating whether or not to sit him down, but i think he'd get off with a "you know that you should always treat a woman right, yeah?" whether dick's actually dating women is up for debate but you get the point and a pat on the back. i believe that bruce operates predominantly under the 'if they have questions, they'll ask' mindset, so he trusts that if dick needs an answer to something, he'll come to bruce. (or just source an answer elsewhere)

i do also think that if anything, alfred would be the one to pull bruce up and ask if he'd adequately informed the boys of things 'one on one' (because he KNOWS that he hasn't). and even then, if bruce were to actually sit dick down, he wouldn't get so far as an introduction spent dancing around the topic because bruce is himself, mortified, before dick stops him and says that he doesn't have to give him this talk, because "wally already did" (much to bruce's disapproval).

as for jason, dying isn't great for a guy's love life. as i pretty much said previously, i don't think bruce would approach anything until it was absolutely relevant (when the boys are already in a relationship). so jason not getting a chance to really date before he died, means that bruce never had the opportunity to talk to him about it. i also believe he'd assume that jason already knows, with the crude jokes he makes, and the kind of people he grew up around on the streets. and obviously, by the time he comes back as red hood, he's too old to 'not know' and it's just presumed he knows his stuff.

i think tim might cause him a little bit (a lot) of trouble though. it definitely scares the shit out of bruce when he finds out about steph getting pregnant by her ex. it prompts him to fling fully into action mode to prevent tim ever being in that situation. that'd be the first time he's properly spoken to one of his kids about it, lots of emphasis on protection and what NOT to do.

however for any other talk pre-steph, i really do think he'd try to palm off the responsibility onto dick (he's very thankful that he's got kids old enough to do it for him), asking him to talk to tim. bruce would probably pull out all the cards "i'm too old" "he'd think it was less weird coming from you" "i don't know what you kids get up to, he's better off hearing it from someone who he can relate to" "i don't want to traumatise the kid" etc etc.

i do think the whole steph situation would be a bit of a reality-check for bruce though, and he'd have the realisation "that could have been any one of the kids" and he would be on his toes for a bit. especially with the amount of girls tim is rumoured to have relations with. him getting with bernard would be a big relief for everyone bruce i think.

once again when he gets with bernard, bruce is 100% palming off the responsibility of having that talk, onto one of his other kids. most likely jason. this is getting super far into my own personal headcanon territory, but literally none of them are straight to me, and i think jason would be the most 'comfortably' gay (mostly just his lack of care about the subject, being percieved as open-ness). bruce would 100% ask dick to talk to tim if it weren't for how private he tends to be with his love life in adulthood. (even getting him to just have the general 'talk' with tim was pushing it)

i don't think he'd ever talk with damian, the league definitely taught him (although objectively). i do think out of all the kids, he'd be the one to have questions though, mainly about the romantic aspect of relationships, as he struggles to wrap his head around the concept of 'love', (which really tests bruce's parenting abilities) i do think dick (having the bond he does with damian) would go out of his way to have a talk with him as he got older though.

as for cass, i don't think she would have ever been taught, with her irregular upbringing, as well as not going to regular school and all. but girls are new in the batfamily, and bruce doesn't want to touch that conversation with a ten-foot pole, so he calls diana in to do it for him.

final note, i also really do think a large contributing factor to bruce most likely never approaching the subject out of his own free will is just how private they all tend to be with their love lives. like i can see dick telling bruce that he's dating someone (as a teenager), but apart from a name and how he knows them, he's not really giving much else away. jason on the other hand just completely leaves it up for everyone else to figure out on their own (it lives entirely in my head that he's like this with his family, but is super close with his partner's family, which is a shock to everyone). if anything, tim's the only one who ever wants people to know about his relationships, for them to 'meet the parents' (bruce) etc etc. it probably all stems from bruce himself being a pretty secretive guy.

[ionobjectshow]

Hi again! I just wanna say I'm sorry that you had to go through people infantilizing Cracklin because he's autistic.... I don't know if they assumed that he had it just because. But it's pretty stupid. He is not a minor to begin with. And Chief is shown to genuinely care about Cracklin in the show. He is stern, but well intentioned. So, seeing that they're both adults. I personally don't see it as problematic.

As of the art style of the show, I really like how the designs are! ^^ each character has their own distinct limb shape, the faces give me a hint about their personality and I just really like the darker theme compared to what we usually get in object shows.

I hope people in the OSC experiment with different styles like your show. With a variety of themes!

☢️ Hello!! Thanks a lot for your understanding. ☢️ Yeah… I'm really tired of all the problems I had because of Cracklin's infantilization. About Chief: Chief was a little rude to Cracklin in the first episode, but it’s understandable: the middle-aged character spent a week alone in a burning nuclear power plant and was under great stress. And then this yellow autistic creature appears, instantly expressing his adoration: 3 Chief is quite closed man and it is difficult for him to show positive emotions and friendliness. But he gradually got used to Cracklin and I REALLY hope that this will become more noticeable in episode 3. ☢️ Thanks for the kind words! In fact, I don't really understand why wider limbs caused so much indignation among the osc. If I can understand why Chief is scary (but he is supposed to be an adult NOT a cute man // which does not change the fact that this is my favorite character and he is gorgeous to me), then Cracklin's face seems very cute.. probably... I hope that at least the backgrounds won't be called ugly. I worked really hard on them /nervous stimming /self-irony ☢️ Speaking of experiments… I'm very worried about the fact that my show shows not only objects, but also ordinary humans. For a long time I was afraid that the fact that the history of objects is tightly intertwined with the history of humans would not be welcome in the community. I think about this very often. But the presence of humans is just as important to this story as the presence of objects.