#somehow not gay

[t3chkn1ght-blog]

How am I not LGBT+?

I'm a cishet male, and yet:

I'm on tumblr

I'm a Computer Science student.

I watch JoJo's Bizarre Adventure, Hazbin Hotel, Helluva Boss, etc.

I'm subscribed to Overly Sarcastic Productions, Jaiden Animations, and PM Seymour.

I play DnD, Stardew Valley, and Baldur's Gate III.

I love me a good musical number.

I've enjoyed Monster Prom and its sequels.

I love Thomas Sanders, One Topic at a Time, The Click, etc.

I think LGBT+ memes are funny (as in, the ones made by actual LGBT+ folk, not conservatives making memes at their expense).

While I don't actively seek out media with LGBT+ characters, when they do show up, I tend to enjoy them.

Actively hate culture war/"woke cult"/redpill bullshit

I'm sex positive, even though I've never had it.

I Think that a lot of gendered stuff (Gendered Bathrooms, "Blue is for boys, pink is for girls") is just stupid.

I grew up on Gravity Falls

I didn't mind playing with "girls toys" growing up (Dollhouses, Princesses, etc.)

I've spent some time on Deviantart

I've read Percy Jackson (don't remember a lot of it, but I did).

Don't mind wearing feminine clothing for a bit (ex: that time I went as a Karen for Halloween)

Have a strong desire to punch homophobes/transphobes in the face.

I mean, if you were to look at all this stuff, you would probably think I'm LGBT+ in some way, but NOPE! I'm a dude. I'm cool with being a dude. I'm not androgynous enough to be nonbinary. I have lewd thoughts about girls and not boys. I'm not gay, I'm not ace, I'm not bi, not pan, not nb, nothing.

Like that one John Mulaney bit, I feel like I was supposed to be LGBT+, and yet I'm not. How did this even happen?

Just a weird thing about me that, when I thought about it, only got weirder.

[lotrmusical]

never let anyone tell you that trawling through mediocre victorian poetry isn't worth it. we just happened upon an absolute BANGER of a worm poem. go read it or else 🪱🪱🪱

[moss-balll]

they really brought david tenant’s son in and said hey do you want to play a gay little boy in good omens 2. just a little camp mf. nepotism done right.

[heyybeach]

Growing up is actually just enjoying the exact same things you enjoyed at 14 years old, but in a more gay way

[isaacthedruid]

this fucking show has been over for almost 4 years, yes that one the homophobic gay monster hunter show. it’s getting gayer with times, congrats to ty and dj on their future marriage. the gays are winning

[gaylittleguys]

unstoppable force vs immovable object

[shesnake]

"… and I whispered to him, 'You are not a member of the dead'… and he was laughing as I said, ‘Alive, alive,’ his hand touching my cheek, stroking my face, clasping finally my chin as he guided me into the light…"

Anne Rice, Interview with the Vampire (1976) Part II

[housetzuyu]

this picture is cracking me up so bad house looks like a recently divorced dad who's spending the weekend with his son and decided to take him to the amusement park

[the-witchhunter]

DP x DC: Wait... this isn’t a gay bar??

I was just thinking about Danny as a bartender at a rogues bar and then it struck me...

Danny thinks he works at a gay bar

Why? Well, have you looked at the clients? Bisexual queen Harley Quinn, lesbian icon Poison Ivy, Two Face is clearly bi(two)sexual and has a thing with Bruce Wayne, Scarecrow is probably ace or maybe aro, Riddler is at the very least homo romantic, hell, even if Red hood comes by he’s bi/pan AND poly

What I’m saying is, based off the clientele, Danny would think he works at a gay bar 

and based on the evidence they have a hard time disagreeing with him

[naofaun]

gay people will see 2 men (or women) who hate each other and would rather tear each other apart than be nice and proceed to ship them more than anything

[uncanny-tranny]

Periodic reminder that unless a person specifically and clearly tells you it is okay to tell others they are trans or queer, you should err on the side of caution and assume they do not want you to tell people (especially random people!) about their transness or queerness.

You have no idea, generally, why somebody doesn't talk openly about their trans or queer status, and you have no idea, truly, how somebody might react to that information. The most progressive person out there is still capable of harbouring incredibly negative thoughts about somebody's queer status.

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

it is. so weird to me that I'm having to say this again after a real-life cartoon supervillian already once ran for president on a platform of hatred & fascism and won, but.

it's November, please fucking vote

[sugawara--san]

oh baby...

[melonnlee]

ddvau edit 🫣🫣

no but seriously this au has taken over my entire life i can’t stop thinking about it /pos

art and au by @kitsuneisi & @xmaruu11

[neinofthem]

every episode with essek in it before the Reveal is so funny because he’s there for maybe 45 minutes max and he spends a third of this time staring deeply into caleb’s eyes, another third giving away state secrets, and the other third saying the most out of pocket batshit things like he expected his swag to carry him through any trials and/or tribulations. he called beau’s cocktail racist and then dipped. they invite him in to dinner and he’s like ‘yeah i made my dad so angry he died. normal. anyways what are your innermost driving motivations, wishes, and fears? is this how conversation works?’ and the nein collectively were just like it’s ok he’s hot. and you KNOW he’s all up in his mind with the whole tortured genius melancholy resignation sadness angst thing and it’s like baby no you’re just bizarre and unusual. god.

[murderandcoffee]

ok i’m back on my bullshit. trans archives agenda time

martin has trouble with health insurance at some point and has to go off t for a while, so his period comes back and he is Suffering. he asks if anyone has any painkillers (specifically vague) and tim’s like “yeah bro i gotchu” and hands him a midol. and martin just looks at him in panic like …does he know?? and tim is just like 😬 don’t mind me i’m just a normal cis guy with normal cis guy painkillers and neither of them ever mentions it again

tim wears a binder underneath his usual buttoned shirts, and likes to keep the top couple buttons undone. people just tend to assume it’s a tanktop, but sasha knows. she’s traded clothes with him a dozen times already

sasha gets bottom surgery and while she’s in recovery tim brings her food every day, and sits with her and tells her what she missed at work. he makes up funny stories that get more and more ridiculous until she’s finally like “okay tim i KNOW you’re lying this time” and he shrugs and replies “all trans men know is make friend laugh, eat doughnut, and lie”

jon gets top surgery but doesn’t tell any of his coworkers what procedure he’s having done, just that he’s having surgery. he’s out of work for weeks, and when he comes back martin notices that he’s no longer wearing what he’d assumed was an undershirt. martin doesn’t think anything of it. tim, however, notices that jon is veeeeery cautious about lifting his arms over his head and is just like ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) i see u, boss (and goes out of his way to retrieve everything that’s on high shelves for jon, who continues to act like nothing is up)

elias sneaks into the archives on the first day of pride month to set a little jar of trans flags in the break room. he does not admit to doing this. he watches from his office as the archives descends into chaos