#source: @incorrect-dnd-classes

[incorrect-sk-universe]

Up: So, Taz is no longer allowed to take the trash out at night. Why, you ask? Because I've caught her five times now trying to train the raccoons to fight.

Taz: You'll be thanking me one day when the third raccoon battalion saves your life

[incorrect-dnd-classes]

Artificer: Ah, the Scientific Method. Step One: Fuck around. Step Two: Find out. Step Three: Record your results. Step Four: Confirm, or fuck around again.

[incorrect-tmnt2012-quotes]

“What’s a little attempted murder between friends?”

— Karai, to April

[tdc-incorrect-quotes]

SkekZok: I can’t believe you assassinated the All-Maudra! SkekVar: Well, “assassinated” implies it was politically motivated. I killed her cause she was a dick, so technically it’s just murder. SkekZok: SkekZok: That’s not better!!

[dragonflavoredcake]

Grian: Fifty percent of my job is making sure no one kills Scar, fifty percent is making sure Scar doesn't kill Scar, and fifty percent is making sure that I don't kill Scar. Pearl: Grian: My job is not easy.

[teenwolfpackincorrectcaptions]

Peter: You’re not talking any sense into me. You’re just cheering me on to disaster.

Stiles: Is that not half of the reason why we’re best friends in the first place?

(source)

[natsskydivingcrew]

Bucky: Racoons have people hands.

Bucky:...

Bucky:... Or do people have racoon hands?!

[paper-gold-theories]

GoldHeart: What are you doing?

Flug: Teaching 5.0.5. how to make pancakes.

GoldHeart: Why are teaching a bear how to make pancakes!?

Flug, shrugs: Because he doesn't know how to.

- HeroFlugAU

[incorrectringsofpower]

Celebrimbor: Ah, the Scientific Method. Step One: Fuck around. Step Two: Find out. Step Three: Record your results. Step Four: Confirm, or fuck around again.

[incorrectneopetsquotes]

Parlax: When someone points at your black clothes and asks whose funeral it is, having a look around the room and saying “haven’t decided yet” is typically a good response.

[renmackree]

Peter: Whenever Derek gets mad at me, I tighten all the lids on our jars so they have to ask me for help.

[sounds of glass shattering in the background]

Peter: It hasn't worked yet, but it will.

[spiltinksky]

Seungkwan: Okay, if you’re going to go and meet people, you’re going to need some pick up lines.

Seokmin: Yes.

Seungkwan: Let’s practice. Hit me with the best you’ve got.

Seokmin: Uhh… you’re pretty?

Seungkwan: I know. Now come on, pick up lines.

[incorrect-dnd-classes]

Cleric: You need to eat healthier. Fighter: No. Cleric: The last person who didn't eat healthier after I told them to died. Fighter: Oh my gods. Cleric: In a fire storm. Fighter: That sounds unrelated. Cleric: I cast the fire storm. Do not disobey me.

[incorrectgalvania]

Atelisia: life hack: u dont have to be a wolf to yell sad noises at the moon

[incorrectcollectiveassrpgs]

Draven: We all have our demons.

Shay-Luna, holding up Raph: This one's mine!

[dragonflavoredcake]

Impulse: Why do you smell like smoke? Tango: I got set on fire twice! Impulse: I thought you were fireproof Tango: Nope! Just stubborn! Impulse: Impulse: Are you okay?