#incorrect dnd class quotes

[incorrect-dnd-classes]

Bard: oh no we’re all doomed by the narrative Sorcerer: maybe you are. i’m the narrative’s favourite. Sorcerer: update: turns out this is not a good thing for me

[tdc-incorrect-quotes]

SkekZok: I can’t believe you assassinated the All-Maudra! SkekVar: Well, “assassinated” implies it was politically motivated. I killed her cause she was a dick, so technically it’s just murder. SkekZok: SkekZok: That’s not better!!

[dragonflavoredcake]

Grian: Fifty percent of my job is making sure no one kills Scar, fifty percent is making sure Scar doesn't kill Scar, and fifty percent is making sure that I don't kill Scar. Pearl: Grian: My job is not easy.

[leelany-world]

Hank: We all have our demons. Nines&Connor, holding up Sixty: This one's ours!

[incorrect-sk-universe]

Up: So, Taz is no longer allowed to take the trash out at night. Why, you ask? Because I've caught her five times now trying to train the raccoons to fight.

Taz: You'll be thanking me one day when the third raccoon battalion saves your life

[ladyphlogiston]

Sorcerer: Nat20 for perception!

Dm: for what?

Sorcerer:.....to tell us whatever it is you've been hinting at

[natsskydivingcrew]

Bucky: Racoons have people hands.

Bucky:...

Bucky:... Or do people have racoon hands?!

[paper-gold-theories]

GoldHeart: What are you doing?

Flug: Teaching 5.0.5. how to make pancakes.

GoldHeart: Why are teaching a bear how to make pancakes!?

Flug, shrugs: Because he doesn't know how to.

- HeroFlugAU

[incorrectringsofpower]

Celebrimbor: Ah, the Scientific Method. Step One: Fuck around. Step Two: Find out. Step Three: Record your results. Step Four: Confirm, or fuck around again.

[renmackree]

Peter: Whenever Derek gets mad at me, I tighten all the lids on our jars so they have to ask me for help.

[sounds of glass shattering in the background]

Peter: It hasn't worked yet, but it will.

[incorrectneopetsquotes]

Parlax: When someone points at your black clothes and asks whose funeral it is, having a look around the room and saying “haven’t decided yet” is typically a good response.

[incorrect-dnd-classes]

Wizard: A spy is giving away every one of our battle plans. Rogue: You look surprised, Sorcerer. Sorcerer: I certainly am. I didn’t realize we had any battle plans.

[spiltinksky]

Seungkwan: Okay, if you’re going to go and meet people, you’re going to need some pick up lines.

Seokmin: Yes.

Seungkwan: Let’s practice. Hit me with the best you’ve got.

Seokmin: Uhh… you’re pretty?

Seungkwan: I know. Now come on, pick up lines.

[dragonflavoredcake]

Impulse: Why do you smell like smoke? Tango: I got set on fire twice! Impulse: I thought you were fireproof Tango: Nope! Just stubborn! Impulse: Impulse: Are you okay?

[pumpkin-flavored-children]

Dominance

Barbarian: *Screams*

Bard: *Screams louder to assert dominance*

Wizard: Should we stop them?

Rogue: No, I wanna see who wins this.

[valorrant]

Jett: yooo, women, get a knife! Get many knives. Keep em on you, like in your pocket. Front pocket. Keep one in your bag. Stash them around your house. Stash one in your car. Just girly things ya know.