#source: the goldbergs

[incorrect-bridgerton-family]

Daphne: What’s the one rule we have in this family?

Hyacinth: Don’t dare Gregory to do stupid things.

Daphne: And why is that?

Gregory, with his tongue stuck to a frozen pole: Because I have no sense of self preservation and a desperate need to be liked and praised?

Daphne: Exactly.

[incorrect-bhaalspawn-quotes]

Shadowheart, raising an eyebrow: You just said ‘I love you.’

Tav, panicking: I say it all the time! I love you, Gale!

Gale: I love you too, Tav!

Tav: See?? Means nothing.

Gale: Hey!!

[overheard-at-hogwarts]

[after James walks in on Sirius & Remus]

Sirius: I've told you this! When a necktie is on the door, the pants are on the floor!

[unholyhelbig]

Y/n: *sobbing incomprehensible nonsense*

Wanda: Honey, we can’t understand you

Y/n: *sill sobbing*

Wanda: Are you physically hurt?

Natasha: DID SOMEONE DROP SOMETHING ON YOU?

[lesbian-deadpool]

Fury: Do you have any special talents besides asking stupid questions?

Peter: Well, I guess I’m easily hurt by insults.

[middleearthmistress]

Arwen: No, you hang up.

Aragorn: No, you hang up.

Arwen: No, you hang up.

Elrond: Will somebody please hang up?!

[incorrect-lackadaisy-cats]

Zib: What’s the one rule we have in this band?

Sy: Don’t dare Rocky to do stupid things.

Zib: And why is that?

Rocky, with his tongue stuck to a frozen street lamp: Because I have no sense of self preservation and a desperate need to be liked and praised?

Zib: Exactly

(Submitted by @systemakhaosu)

[totallycorrectsailormoonquotes]

Here's what I know about women - they confuse and terrify me.

Yuuichirou

[incorrect-zone-quotes]

Taako: Aw, come on, Barold. Commit a felony with me. It’ll be a good bonding experience, or at the very least a cautionary tale.

[marce-mallow]

Lassie: Do you have any special talents besides asking stupid questions?

Shawn: Well, I guess I’m easily hurt by insults.

[incorrectuksies]

mike: i dare you -

specs: tommy boy is not allowed to accept dares anymore.

mike: why?

tommy boy, sighing: “i have no regard to my own or other’s personal safety”.

[incorrect-guilty-gear]

Sin: Come on, let me go on the mission!

Ky: No, this is a delicate operation, it’s no place for a child!

Sin: If I’m a child, then why was I charged as an adult when I borrowed that police horse, hmmm?

Ky: ...I have no response to that.

[incorrect-bhaalspawn-quotes]

Shadowheart, about Lae'zel: She annoys me so much, I just wanna kiss her stupid face.

[totallycorrectmlp]

Twilight Sparkle: Please let me do something to fix your disgusting eye. Pinkie Pie: It's just pink-eye. Everypony gets it. Twilight Sparkle: Not everypony gets it from a kaleidoscope they found under a bridge. Pinkie Pie: A goopy eye is a small price to pay for this colorful view of Equestria.

[incorrectinvaderzim]

As most of you know, I’ve spent the majority of my life hysterical and out of control.

Dib

[lesbian-deadpool]

Thor: That’s what a strong marriage is about- Mutual by giving a crap.