#to be clear: this is only really a problem because the thing I actually want to be doing is making a fanvid. but I can’t do that. because

[osterby]

I've taken polls and surveys like this (a few political, more re consumerism) and for the most part they are *very* poorly designed.

Like, I remember one where it showed an image of a grocery shelf with a bunch of different brands of coffee, and asked me to click the ones I would buy in real life. I clicked all the brands I would, theoretically, choose from, and then later in the survey it became clear that they actually wanted me to pretend I was shopping for coffee and pick what I would buy in that single trip if those were the options available. And there was no way to go back and change my answer.

So their data told them that a shopper like me would buy like twelve pounds of coffee in one go.

I've seen a LOT that had technical difficulties, like where a map like this would simply not display at all and you can click randomly and just move on to the questions that aren't borked. Do they discard borked questions? Do they even know it's borked?

One very common problem is "choose all that apply" but they've used radio buttons and you can only choose one, another is a limited list with no "other/none/vanilla extract" option and you have to select something to un-grey the "next" button.

This type of survey is also where a lot of those very funny or insulting gender category screenshots come from, because the survey designers literally do not know the population they are polling.

The better designed surveys have attention checks, things like:

Which of these things have you done this week? Helped my child with homework Travelled to the moon Bought groceries Had tea with Einstein

or Please ignore the question beneath and click "yellow". No matter your actual favourite color, please select yellow so we know you're paying attention. What is your favourite colour? Blue Red Yellow

Discard answers that screw up those questions, and you'll weed out a lot of the random clickers, jokesters, and participants who are really struggling to understand the questions. But a lot don't bother with these types of questions at all.

For a quiz like this, using locations on a map that the vast majority of Americans totally will know will be a good way to filter. "Of Americans who can accurately click on Texas, this percent can also click on Iran" is more meaningful than "of Americans we put this poll in front of, this percent accurately clicked on Iran". You could also compare that data to other studies (if they're available) to estimate how many who don't click on Texas genuinely have very little geographical knowledge vs how many are trolling, joking, or can't see the map.

Another way to get your participants to focus up would be to ask them to labels a number of countries, including ones near Iran. The quiz will be longer and more difficult, but an exercise like that will get people who have the gist of things but not a map that lives in their head to actually think about what they know and go "ok, so I know that one's Saudia Arabia and I know Afghanistan is further East, soooo, yeah, this one's gotta be Iran" instead of just clicking on the Middle East and being like "eh, it's somewhere around there" and moving on.

So, can most Americans accurately point to Iran on a world map? Probably not. Do any Americans genuinely believe that Iran is in the middle of the Atlantic or think it's a boot shaped peninsula? Also probably not.

I'm not going to question why anyone thought iran was in moscow but what's with the random dots in the middle of the ocean

[ihaznoclue]

HIDE AND GO SEEK~

Knockout x Breakdown x Human Reader

Warnings -> Hide and seek, Blindfold and Bondage, Use of safe words, Body worship, Praise kink

I had a dream about this... so I'm writing it out to my fellows who love both Knockout and Breakdown, I AM DOWN BAD FOR THEM

NSFW - 18+ Minors DNI!

Hide and seek, a go too childhood game that you used to play when you were little as you loved the thrill of hiding, feeling the excitement as you waited until the chosen seeker find every single hider in their hiding spot

But you never seemed to be very good at hiding.. sometimes you were the seeker that took forever to find each person under 1 hour, or that you would hide in the most obvious spots just because you were 'easy to see'

But you didn't think anything of it until right now, running away from your two decepticon boyfriends as they suggested to go find you, your body felt.. excitement and pure joy, though you were not really positive as you were gonna be founded easily

But once they also suggested that once they find you, they get to pin you down as one of them blindfolds your eyes and one ties your hands together so you can't touch anything or them in general

Now you were hurrying to go find a spot out in the forest, the context of this is after a mission that they successfully completed the mission and wanted to take this as a reward on hide and seek

But the twist is that once they do find you, they could do anything to you as you agreed on it, making sure they had your consent to it as you eagerly nodded

Now here you were, in a dark forest, there wasn't much options to hide.. a bunch of trees and some rocks here and there but you then found a spot that was a bit far from where they were waiting until it hits 2 minutes

It was an abandoned car that was left to rot, dirty and torned apart a bit as you rested your back against it to catch your breath as you did run a while to get here

You didn't know when they were gonna start hunting, but two giant handsome robot mechs hunting you down made you shiver in pleasure, thinking about what they were going to do with you

Maybe you wanted them to find you

Maybe that you would turn yourself in and accept defeat and let them take you of their own, let them do whatever they want to you

Closing your legs as you bit your lip to the thought alone as you waited for a bit, but then suddenly hearing heavy footsteps, peeking up through the broken glass window at the front to only see Knockout as he calls out

"I know you're close darling, I can sense you~" His deep and raspy voice called out but the only thing was where was breakdown?

That made your stomach churn a little, breakdown must be somewhere else or maybe he went to go somewhere to find you instead of going with knockout to not take longer

Then the footsteps were fading as you let out a breath you were holding, this was so exciting, you were actually going to beat big and tall robots from a childhood game that you used to play when you were younger

But what then interrupted as you then saw breakdown right in your clear view vision meaning that he was right in front of you from a few miles, you tired to sneak quietly and quickly but stepped on a twitch that made him finally see you as you saw him smirk, running to you now

"HA! Found ya! Think you can run away from me fleshy?" He chuckled as it only took him a couple of steps to catch up to you and pin you down making you squeal out, causing Knockout to hear the commotion from nearby

You were now blindfolded and tied up, no where to go and no where to escape

Breakdown picked you up so effortlessly with no problem on his shoulder plate, feeling the vibration of his heavy steps walking to where you presume it was to Knockout to let him know that Breakdown found you

"Damn it.. I thought I fooled you.." You mumbled as you squirmed around, making Breakdown slap your ass making you yelp in surprise

"Quit squirming would ya, you're gonna hurt yourself or fall if you keep moving on my shoulder like that" He spoke

"Sorry" You apologised as you laid limp on his shoulder, your hands completely stuck behind your back and that you couldn't see where you were right now until you heard a familiar voice call out

"My my~, look what the cat dragged in, I knew I could sense you but seems like breakdown found you first darling~"

You the gasped at the sudden touch you felt, sharp fingers tracing your leg all the way up between your thighs

"Let's have our fun with them then~" Knockout suggested as he knew Breakdown was getting impatient

"Finally!" Breakdown cheered, around you all you could hear was some shuffling of the leaves below you as you were then placed down on something metal, cold and hard, either that is was Knockout or Breakdown but couldn't really tell

You started feeling as much around with your hands still tied together, you were about to ask who you were laying on but immediately knew who it was by the voice and the teasing "Watch where your hands are going dear, don't want me to take you here and there~"

It was Knockout for sure

"I do wish to see your beautiful eyes but seeing you like this is more pleasuring to me~ So submissive to me and Breakdown, I can't wait for this" He teased as you felt his cold and sharp digit tracing up to your jawline making you whine a little

As you were distracted by Knockout's touch you didn't realise that Breakdown took off your bottoms as you finally felt his glossa on you as you gasped in surprise, leaning forward only to be pulled back by Knockout

Leaning your head back on Knockout's shoulder plater as you sat there moaning like crazy as Breakdown continued his business until Knockout took your chin and turned your head to him

Now you were kissing him as you gasp and moaned into the kiss trying to calm your heart down, everything was going too fast as your legs started to shake, drool coming down on your chin as you broke the kiss

"Fuckkk~" You cursed as you tried so hard not to come already but you couldn't bare the overwhelming pleasure Breakdown was giving to you right now

Hearing a deep chuckle from Knockout as you felt his mouth on your shoulder, giving little kisses here and there maybe some hickeys as well

Your hips start to move of their own as you wanted more and more pleasure from your muscle robot

"Looks like they are close Breakdown, keep doing what you're doing" Knockout smirked

You then felt knockout's hand trailing down more and more until you suddenly felt his hand in between your thighs making you more louder as you were very close to finishing

"Come on dear, give it to us" Knockout teased you while slightly fingering you as Breakdown continued to eat you out

...

..

.

You have now came multiple times as you completely fucked out of your mind, drooling as you tried to speak out to them to stop but no words could come out of your mouth as moans and whimpers just came out

Knockout wasn't helping either as he was trailing his single digit on your sensitive body as you shook making him chuckle out a laugh

Breakdown was still at it as he still licking you up, as he was now fingering you now trying to keep the cum inside you as he kept your legs open from closing together as highly sensitive you were right now

You were suddenly off the edge as you screamed out as you finally came undone but they weren't going to stop as you took the chance to say the safe word

"S..Spark" You whimpered out as loud as you could making the boys stop in their place, you felt Breakdown getting up from where he was until you finally felt the ropes untie

Then the blindfold, making you squint a bit until your eyes re-focused, you looked like a messy

Hair messy, tears in your eyes, drool down your chin, bite marks, hickeys everything that covered your body

You were against knockout as you calmed down, Breakdown asking so many questions to see if you were okay

Knockout asked you the same questions as you told them that you needed a break just for a bit

They agreed as they both said sorry for going overboard and that they didn't realise but you waved them off

Now Knockout tucking your hair back behind your ear as Breakdown cuddled up to Knockout, you were still laying on top of knockout as you relaxed

Next time they will be more careful..

-A<3

[bluescreenvirus]

chaos' apology for + addressment of everything.

i am posting this for him as he is not logged in anymore and does not wish to, but this is directly copy and pasted from him. i will be posting other VERY important statements and information to help clear a few things up, especially regarding the misinfo involving sugarydeceit. i've already cleared some of that up privately, but i want it to be public info so ppl can feel secure. it may take longer than others to post due to being busy, but please keep an eye out if you could:

...

"first and foremost: i am sorry. i'm going to get into specifics but i want to preface with a blanket "i'm sorry" first.

to start, i'm sorry to ridley and friends and the ventblogs for not handling things better. i've been doing... bad, to put it lightly, ever since the document dropped. i've been unpacking nearly 8 years of constant abuse every day, and i've started taking it out on others. i have noticeably gotten worse than i used to be. which is an unfortunate part of healing. and i regret forcing the resulting harshness of my pain onto others, especially some minors. it wasn't your guys' fault for the things that happened to me, you shouldn't have been subjected to my ire. it was wrong. so again i am sincerely sorry for that.

and no, forgiveness is not my goal, i don't want anyone to demand i be forgiven or for anyone to feel obligated to forgive me. i don't have any problem getting mad at people who think it's okay to harass other people in my honor- it's not okay. it's never okay. and i'm really sorry that people did that. i'm not sure exactly what was sent to people originally, it's really hard for me to see/find things with how many people have me blocked, so i'm sorry if that apology feels too vague. but i am specifically sorry that people tried to blame ridley for me wanting to kms. it... was because of that situation, yes, but i don't want to put that on a kid, and no one else should either. especially if you're not me. why are you accusing anyone if you're not me. it's not your place. stop it.

i'm also sorry for the situation that sparked all of this. i really did believe that the ventblogs had a major problem with acting impulsively and making situations worse than they needed to be, however, i did not express that opinion in a nice way. and in the process i made people feel like i didn't care about the hate/harassment they had recieved. so i'm sincerely sorry for that, too.

i'm also sorry for bringing up kitty genovese. it was NEVER my intention to trivialize a rape+murder, i had hoped that would be obvious, but i saw that it wasn't and became angrier instead of calmly explaining what i meant. i only referenced kitty genovese in regards to the bystander effect- i know many in this fandom are young, so it's possible people googled her and saw a rape+murder case and took what i said very wrong. which i understand. if you don't know, kitty genovese is the main example used in every study of something called "the bystander effect", that's why i brought up the case. i felt the bystander effect applied to what i was experiencing. but it would've been better to just say the bystander effect, rather than assume everyone knew who kitty genovese was and the studies that stemmed from her case. i'm sorry again for all of that.

now i just. want to try and explain some things, if i may? i know people don't particularly want to listen to me anymore, so if you want to just stop reading at the apology, feel free. that's why i've separated the two. if you do choose to stop reading what i have to say here, i wish you well.

it was never ever my intention to make ridley feel attacked/endangered by me. i was just really, really scared, when i saw that ridley was sharing sugarydeceits/sweetfuls/lopsys lies about me, and people were believing them.

sugarydeceit has been harassing my partner and i for months- over half a year, actually, and has a history of doxxing people and sharing their names publicly. it even took one of the people to court, lio convoy, who i don't like as a person obviously, but sugarydeceit did take him to court. you can even find the recording of it on youtube. sugarydeceit has threatened to do the same thing with me many times. i've been careful to hide my personal information but even then it's not a guarantee of my safety. so i freaked out, and tunnel-visioned, because i need to keep myself and my partner safe from sugarydeceit. and any support it gets emboldens it to send us threats of death, harm, and other horrible things. i already woke up to some anons from it today because of all of this. [pictured below] having support has made it brave again when i had just finally gotten it to back off again a few days ago because it was stupid enough to insult sugar's grief about his dying great grandfather.—

[anon hate as a result of the mention of sugary deceit pictured above, one even targeting chaos abuse from KC by saying "go cuddle your little sis." not blaming anyone of course, this is only the fault of those who sent these anons.]

—that's why i wanted the posts taken down, on top of the fact that the information was untrue/exaggerated, which i'm sure sugar addressed in this post already. the posts put me and sugar in danger, the posts got us harassed- like i knew they would. i felt powerless and miserable and i didn't know what to do anymore. i really was making plans on how to kill myself because i thought it was over for me. i wasn't going to survive if the whole fandom began supporting my stalker, so i was in... survival mode, i guess. in that moment i wished i was back in the zcp. and i still kind of feel like that. it was abuse, but at least i didn't know that it was. it was a comfortable kind of misery. maybe that's just some weird kind of stockholm syndrome, i don't know.

i never want to come back to this fandom. it's absolutely mortifying to have my 'friends' all outcast and hate me for nearly 8 years, only to find a place i thought was safe, and then have the same exact thing happen. i haven't felt safe here ever since i was harassed for saying i didn't have enough information to pick sides in the maxim vs ridley situation, and then maxim himself was horrible to me in a way i can't address publicly right now, and then all of this. just being here scares me. all of anticare scares me. that's why i told people to not interact or use my ocs anymore. i was scared and just wanted to be left alone. it wasn't a personal attack against anyone, or me trying to invalidate previous support, i just had too many bad experiences that traumatized me and triggered me. i'm never even going to be able to release my own statement about my abuse because i'm terrified of the fandom picking it apart to try and invalidate me, or using the personal nature of the content to send me crueler targetted harassment, or just not caring.

i do have some involvement in the doc. i provided them with a fair amount of information considering my past proximity to kc, and i was able to confirm/deny things they were unsure about. i was going to have a section about my abuse, but i pulled out of adding it. so please don't discredit the entire doc just because you hate me. there are real predators, and real extremely damning pieces of evidence, addressed within it. and some other victims still made the choice to include their stories. so if you care about the other victims you'll spread it and support it. please.

the only further 'involvement' i'm probably ever going to have is boosting the doc when it comes out and answering any questions about it though i doubt i'll get any and i don't think i want to put them in the tag if i do answer any. if anything questions should be directed toward the doc blog and if they need an answer from me they'll ask me and parrot what i say.

the support was nice while it lasted and i appreciate it. but i can't be here anymore. and i would appreciate it if people just stopped talking about me so i don't have to be terrified of being put in danger when i can't defend myself. but i can't demand anything. i just hope someone will listen.

and i have changed my mind to agree with aobasgirlfriend, another victim, who iirc felt as though this comic shouldn't have a fandom anymore. i understand that point of view now. i don't think it should have a fandom anymore either. too many people were hurt using it, me included. i think everyone left should move on and let it die. there's nothing good that will come from staying. nothing at all.

if there's anything i've forgotten to address or apologize for, you can send it to bluescreenvirus because i'm logging out for an undetermined amount of time.

goodbye." — chaosblasts

[goldenlionprince]

free my man

Check out how they use the phone James got to Sirius in the last story in this heartbreaking art! And when you're done with hurting yourself, come back here because it's finally time to get Sirius back out of prison in The Bodyguard AU with @sorenphelps! you can find previous parts in my AO3 collection and in @sorenphelps Bodyguard AU tag

tagging @neverenoughmarauders @lovelymasks @0o-r-anon-o0

.

Twelve weeks.

Almost three whole months.

Lily had told James that it would take a while, but twelve weeks are still a fucking long time to wait to have your arms back around someone you love.

Too long for James' taste.

Waiting the last few minutes feels like torture but he will get through them. He has waited three months for this, he can do a few minutes more.

Today they will finally release Sirius. There is no trial. The charges were finally dropped because of the lack of evidence or motive. Crouch didn't like it.

He especially didn't like it when it came to light that the Head of the Department of Sports had been blackmailed by Bertha Jorkins because of some shady money laundering business he is involved in and she had stumbled upon. Ludo Bagman had been in Godric's Grove too at the time of Jorkins' murder so he had an actual motive to do away with her.

But of course they hadn't arrested Ludo Bagman yet. He doesn't get the same treatment as Sirius. That might be because the blackmailing evidence came from an anonymous source – James had worked hard to uncover all that, thank you – but they had arrested Sirius on even less evidence. The double standards of the ministry.

James walks back and forth in the small room, unable to stand still. Lily is watching him but she doesn't say a thing, which James is really grateful for.

Finally the door opens and there he is. He's looking a little worn, the hair short but starting to grow back in. A smile lights up his face though when he sees James.

And James is across the room and in his arms quicker than he can think, almost crashing them both down onto the floor with the force of his kiss, with his unbridled enthusiasm to have Sirius back.

Oh, how James has missed this. Has missed him. Having contact over the phone has helped, but nothing can beat having Sirius right here in person.

Sirius's arms wrap around him, holding him tight and balancing them both. For a moment James forgets about all that has happened. But only for a moment.

“I hate to interrupt this,” Lily says, the smile clear in her voice. “But Sirius still needs to sign the release papers so we can get out of here.”

Laughing, Sirius disentangles himself from James. It's so good to hear that sound.

Lily hands over the pen and Sirius signs the papers, James still glued to his side.

And just like that he's a free man again.

****

Lily takes them home in her car, taking back roads so the people from the press won't be a problem. James doesn't let go of Sirius' hand the whole way. He needs that little point of contact like a life line. Sirius doesn't seem to mind.

They say goodbye to Lily at their front door and just like that James has Sirius right back where he belongs.

As soon as the door falls shut behind them he wraps his arms around Sirius' neck and kisses him, long and deep and hungry to catch up on lost time.

“What do you want to do,” James asks between kisses, his fingers slipping into the unfamiliar short hair. The strands are barely long enough now to bury his fingers in them. James still has to get used to that.

Sirius' hands slide beneath James' shirt and up his back, pulling him even close. “Taking a shower would be great, actually.”

James pulls back just a little, just enough to brush his nose against Sirius'. “Anything you want.”

They leave a trail of clothes on the way to the bathroom, something to deal with later. It's a lot more unhurried than James would have expected but it's nice. The warm water feels good and so does having Sirius so close again, skin to skin.

They fall into bed after, tangled together, not an inch of space between them. James' fingers card through Sirius' short hair, Sirius' arms wrapped around James' middle, his head resting on James' chest. They don't talk. They just enjoy this.

The feeling of having each other again without anything that separates them.

[pickaropoprocks]

Fighting battles that have ABSOLUTELY been seen before (wanting to restart my Animal Crossing New Leaf town so I can begin the game from scratch and as myself as I am now vs. not wanting to restart my town because nostalgia and I'd miss my villagers)

[thisfairytalegonebad]

You move out of your family home and suddenly you do not get any of the gossip anymore GOD

[theprincessandthepie]

the problem with rewatching a network television show is that there’s so fucking much of it.

[lokh]

I think it’s muscle tension, for me, my blood pressure and rate is fine. I had it for i dunno, 3 months? It also felt like I couldnt breathe deep enough. And again another time for a couple of months, which felt even more muscular than the time b4, stabbing pain when I laid on that side for a month, that one started at a social event completely out of nowhere so couldn't have been pulled by anything other than internal tension. I think spending so long researching what it could be, and trying to Make it go away made it much worse because ofc…it was giving me anxiety which made it hurt which made me anxious. I can’t tell you what made it go away, I think seeing a doctor to be like. You’re fine. Was good. But after that trying to accept it and idk, telling my body to do it worst instead of trying to fight it and being scared of it getting worse. I still get it now but usually only for a few days. I also try to get my heart rate up once a day by like. Jumping or running etc. which kinda helps get rid of the anxiety that I feel like…builds up without my awareness.

hmmm interesting... im glad that its lessened for you at least!

[arolesbianism]

I've been passively watching an isat playthrough while twiddling my thumbs in my current oni save as I wait for my new power systems to be done and hey guys. I think one of these bitches is aromantic. Why did no one tell me one of these bitches is aromantic I would have played the game myself if I knew that

[shiftthemoon]

reality shifting isn’t hard. you’ve been told it’s hard because everyone’s too scared to admit it’s not. they cling to their 800-step methods, their must-have crystals, their perfect conditions because they think that if they let go of that control, they’ll fail. but here’s the thing: the more you try to control the process, the more you convince yourself it’s out of your control. and that’s the problem. that’s why so many people feel stuck. shifting isn’t some big, far-fetched thing. it’s just you. it’s always been you.

we’re conditioned to think we’re powerless. think about it—school, work, society, all of it drills this idea into us that everything has to be proven, earned, validated. so, when you hear about shifting, your brain freaks out and says, wait, wait, this is too easy, this can’t be real. and then you spiral. you overcomplicate it. you make yourself think you need the “perfect” script, the “right” subliminal, or that you have to meditate for three hours while the stars align perfectly. like, no… you don’t. all of that? it’s fluff. it’s noise.

at its core, shifting is belief. just belief. no, really, let that sink in. you don’t need to “do” belief perfectly. it’s not something you master through sheer willpower. it’s something you already have. you’ve believed in things your whole life. you believed in gravity without needing proof. you believe your favorite songs are beautiful without needing to explain why. belief is natural. it’s effortless when you stop overthinking it. that’s the energy you need to bring to shifting—trust. trust that your mind knows what it’s doing, and that if you let it, it will take you there. every single extra thing you pile on? the overthinking, the doubt, the need for guarantees? that’s what’s slowing you down. not the “lack of progress,” not some mythical “block”—it’s you convincing yourself it’s harder than it is.

and let’s talk about social media for a second. oh my god, the shifting community on social media… i get it. it’s comforting to see other people on this journey. but let’s be honest—how much of that content is actually helping you? like, really? 90% of the time, scrolling through shifting advice isn’t inspiring; it’s overwhelming. everyone’s got their own opinions, their own “best methods,” their own rules. one person says scripting is a must, another says it’s a waste of time. one person swears by affirmations, another says visualization is the only way. and before you know it, you’re sitting there questioning everything you thought you knew, wondering if you’ll ever get it “right.” spoiler alert: you already know how to shift. you don’t need a thousand voices telling you what to do. in fact, the more you listen to them, the harder it becomes to hear yourself.

take a break. seriously. log off the apps. give yourself space to breathe and think. ask yourself: why do i want to shift? what’s stopping me? what feels right to me? no tiktok trend, youtube guide, or reddit post can answer those questions for you. only you can. and i know that sounds scary. we’ve been conditioned to think we need external validation for everything, but shifting is a deeply personal thing. you don’t need a step-by-step tutorial. you need to trust your instincts. that’s it.

and let me be clear: i’m not saying methods or subliminals are bad. they’re fine if they help you feel aligned. but they’re not what makes shifting happen. you are. methods are just tools. if you use them, great. if you don’t, that’s great too. because the truth is, shifting isn’t about doing things “right.” it’s about letting go of the idea that you need to.

so let me break it down for you. the only things you really need to shift are:

1. a desire. you have to want to go to your desired reality. no brainer, right?

2. belief. this is the big one. you have to trust it’s possible. no “what ifs,” no “but hows.” just trust.

3. persistence. if it doesn’t happen right away, that’s okay. don’t give up. if you’ve ever learned to ride a bike, you know that falling doesn’t mean you can’t do it—it just means you’re learning. shifting is the same.

that’s it. no fancy rituals, no endless research, no “perfect” conditions. the process is simple because it’s natural. you’ve probably done it before without even realizing it— the only reason it feels hard now is because you’ve convinced yourself it has to be.

stop making it harder than it needs to be. shifting isn’t this unattainable, mystical thing reserved for “chosen ones.” it’s something anyone can do. you can do it. your mom can do it. that anti-shifter lurking in every crevice of shiftblr could do it. you’ve always been capable. but you have to stop getting in your own way. stop doubting yourself. stop relying on others to tell you what’s possible. this is your journey. own it.

and above all, be patient. shifting is not a race. it’s not about how fast you can get there or how perfect your dr is. it’s about trust, intention, and focus. log off, tune into yourself, and let it happen. shifting has always been yours to claim. it’s not something you need permission for. it’s not something you need to earn. it’s just you, your mind, and your belief. always has been, always will be.

[sonrium]

DP X DC: A Minor Drinking Problem

Phantom is a relatively new member of the JLA, but it's been a few months, and things are settling in well. He's shy and polite but is a master of the snark with villains.

Before a big mission, the all hands on deck kind, everyone is talking about scars and the crazy stories behind them to distract from the coming fight. Danny, finally feeling like he can join in the conversation with all these adult heroes, pulls off his right glove to show a pretty gnarly scar on the back of his wrist. “I got this one when I fought a guy from the Revolutionary War a few weeks ago! Didn't think he'd charge me with a bayonet.” He shares a couple more stories and scars, but only the ones that he can easily show off.

Because of stories like that and some historical depictions of Phantom from different time periods, they think he's this ancient and powerful immortal that just looks like a teenager, it wouldnt be the first time. He's powerful enough to go toe to toe with Superman, so there's no way he's actually a kid. He even sometimes has the haunted, world weary eyes that their most hardened members only get after experiencing too much. Danny, being our lovable, obliviously dense idiot, has not realized that they think he's an ancient being.

After the mission concludes -it was a rough one-, the JLA celebrate their victory with a couple drinks back at the watch tower. Danny is understandably uncomfortable with this whole situation and keeps asking, “Are you sure I should be here?” They reassure him it's fine as they pass around beers, which Danny politely declines several times. Danny eventually sees this as the perfect chance to pad his blackmail folders on his inebriated coworkers.

Anyway, as the night goes on, they have a good time, but Phantom still hasn't gotten a drink like the rest of them, and Green Lantern (or hero of your choice) really wants their shy friend to come out of his shell. So, he slams an open beer bottle on the coffee table in front of Phantom. “Come on Phantom! Let loose a little. Celebrate!”

“Dude! What the hell?! I'm 16! That's illegal!” Phantom squeaks in shock.

“We don't care how old you were when you died. It's how long you've been a ghost that counts.” Flash slings an arm around Danny's shoulders from where he’s sat next to him on the couch. Flash can't get drunk, but he also thinks it would be fun to see their uptight new member drunk.

“That's even worse! You'd be giving alcohol to a two year old!” Phantom is horrified that his coworkers are so casually breaking the law.

“But you said you fought in the Revolutionary War this morning!” Green Lantern said with his eyebrows knit in confusion.

“No, I said I fought someone from the Revolutionary War. As in, the ghost of someone from the revolutionary war!”

“You can't pull that on us. There's murals and stuff of you from thousands of years ago.” The Flash waves off with a laugh.

Phantom’s finger presses painfully hard into Flash’s chest. “I do not need to explain time travel to you of all people. My mentor hates you, and I'm STILL sent on missions constantly to clean up your messes.” Phantom's clear and low. Flash liked it better when he was shouting and not staring him down like a predator with narrowed eyes.

(This random idea popped into my head. It made me laugh, so I thought you might, too. Here you go!)

[urmum-lovesme]

Bunny (P8)

Rafe Cameron x Maybank!Reader

summary: Struggling to keep her and JJ’s home afloat, Y/N turns to the only option that guarantees fast cash- stripping at a club on the Cut. But when Rafe Cameron catches her in the act, he sees the perfect opportunity to tighten his grip around her life.

a/n: I was worried you guys were gonna bomb my house after the chapter yesterday so I though I gotta dish this out quick, so here's the next part. This chapter is so hot- but so gut wrenching. no further comments.

(thats a lie- lowkey re-reading this now about to post and think I shifted through the chapter in the tense I was writing in, lowkey not deep but my apologies 😬)

warnings: mentions of alcohol, strip tease, lap dance, sexual tension, emotional distress, mentions of past harassment (implied sexual assault and rape), kinda smut but not really, sad and stressed bunny :(

(P1) (P2) (P3) (P4) (P5) (P6) (P7) (P8) (P9) (P10) (P11) (P12) (P13) (P14)

Rafe’s steps were slow, unhurried, leading the girl up the staircase, the only glow in the dimly lit house coming from the room at the end of the hall. Y/N followed without a word, the air thick, her pulse matching the steady beat of their ascent. She had never been in this house before, but she had never expected it to feel like this. When they reached the office, Rafe pushed the door open wider and stepped inside. The scent of expensive cologne and whiskey filled her senses. He moved with a quiet confidence, walking toward the small bar cart in the corner, where he poured himself a drink, the amber liquid catching the light. He barely glanced at her before tilting the glass slightly in her direction.

“Want one?”

“No.”

She shook her head as she looked away from him, her gaze darting around the four walls. His eyes flickered over her, unreadable, before he took a slow sip murmuring out,

“Suit yourself"

Y/N shifted on her feet, taking in the room. It was painfully neat, every book on the shelf precisely aligned, the desk practically untouched save for a few scattered papers. Her eyes wandered, landing on the fireplace, and above it, a framed picture of three kids. Sarah, Wheezie, and Rafe himself- years younger, looking at the camera dressed smartly- if she had to take a guess she assumed it must've been for Midsummers. She swallowed, forcing her eyes away from the frame just as Rafe leaned back against his desk, glass in hand. He was watching her. Studying. The same way he always did, but there was something different now. Maybe it was her or maybe it was the fact that she wasn’t snapping at him like usual, wasn’t fighting him for control over whatever this thing between them was. She cleared her throat, crossing her arms.

“So...?”

Rafe exhaled through his nose, amused at her impatience. He swirled his whiskey in his glass, watching her.

“You’re actin' strange”

Her jaw tightened as she kept her arms tightly folded, “That a problem?”

“No,” He took another sip, letting the silence stretch, letting her sit in it “just an observation.”

She hated that he was good at reading her, hated that he noticed things, hated his stupid fucking smugness. Hated even more that he was right. But instead of answering, she just shifted her weight from one foot to the other, waiting. Rafe finally set his glass down on the deep mahogany desk, leaning against it, running his tongue along his teeth before speaking.

“Y/N, what are you actually doing here?”

Her stomach tensed, because she knew what he was really asking. God, she'd slapped him in the fucking face and now she was here, in his office, in his house. Yet she also knew she wasn’t about to give him a precise answer, cause two can play this stupid game of back and forth,

“I'm here to dance for you”

Rafe tilted his head slightly, as if he was mulling her answer over. Finally, he exhaled slowly, dragging his knuckles along his jaw before finally pushing off the desk.

“Right”

He moves, settling himself down onto the leather couch, legs spread wide, whiskey glass resting lazily in his grip. His eyes stay on her, watching, assessing. There's something heavier about the air between them tonight, something pressing at the edges and it causes her to speak up.

"I need music."

A hum rumbles through his chest, amusement flickering across his face at her little demand. He reaches for his phone, thumb lazily scrolling before selecting a song. The speakers in the background hum to life, the slow, sensual rhythm filling the room, seeping into the space between them. "So—" he drawls, swirling the whiskey in his glass,

"you gonna be my pretty little dancer tonight Bunny?"

She bit the inside of her cheek, creating a stinging feeling which she hoped would numb the pressure in her chest. This was what she asked for, what she came here for. So she swallowed down the lump in her throat and let the music take over, moving in tune with the slow, deliberate beat. Her fingers skim along the hem of her shorts, teasing, a light brush of fingertips against fabric before she hooks them just beneath the waistband. The motion is unhurried, drawn out, the shorts inching down the curve of her hips as she rocked them from side to side, before slipping lower, lower, lower- pooling at her ankles. She stepped out of it with precision, bare legs catching the glow of the fireplace, a flickering contrast against the deep shadows of the room.

The heat of his gaze is palpable, dragging over her newly exposed skin like a touch. He doesn’t sip his drink now, doesn’t move- just watches, the ice in his glass barely shifting as he grips it a little tighter. She lets her hands travel, brushing over her sides, her stomach, her ribs, before they come to rest just below her chest, teasing at the band of her top. A slow roll of her hips follows, matching the hypnotic rhythm of the music. Every movement is deliberate like a silent challenge, a game of control. Then, she turns her back now facing him, moving just enough for him to see the word printed onto the pink panties stretched across her hips.

'Bunny'

A muscle jumps in his jaw.

She keeps moving, hips swaying to the slow pulse of the music, rolling with the beat as she lets her hands drift up, fingertips grazing the hem of her t-shirt. The fabric lifts slowly, teasing, inching higher over her stomach, then her ribs. Rafe doesn’t say a word, doesn’t make a sound, but she can feel the weight of his stare pressing into her skin, scorching her in the dimly lit room. She pulls the t-shirt over her head, her back now bare except for the delicate strings holding her bikini together, tied neatly into a bow at the centre. The soft glow from the fireplace casts shadows along the curves of her body, highlighting the sharp dip of her spine and the gentle slope of her shoulders.

Rafe shifts, sinking further into the couch, his grip tightening around the glass before he brings it to his lips. He takes a slow sip of whiskey, the ice clinking softly against the crystal as he urges the liquor to sooth his sudden dry mouth. His tongue swipes across his bottom lip, catching the lingering taste of alcohol as his head tilts back slightly, eyes dragging over every inch of her. His gaze is lazy, hooded, but there’s something sharp behind it, something that burns hotter the longer he looks.

She moves closer, each step slow, deliberate, the soft hum of the music carrying her across the room. The whiskey-laced air between them feels thick, pressing against her skin as she nears. She doesn’t straddle him- doesn’t give him that satisfaction- but instead turns, her back facing his chest as she lowers herself onto his lap. His legs are spread wide, her body fitting perfectly between them. The moment she starts to move, grinding down in slow rolls, his breath hitches just slightly, barely noticeable- but she catches it.

Her hands plant firmly on his knees, steadying herself as she works against him, her movements unhurried, teasing. Rafe’s jaw tightens, his tongue pressing against the inside of his cheek as he watches, as he feels her. His fingers flex around his glass before he exhales, setting it down on the side table with a soft clink.

Then, both hands are on her hips.

His grip is firm and guiding, thumbs pressing into the soft flesh there, dragging her down just a little harder, a little slower. He doesn’t rush it- he'd never rush something like this. Doesn’t take control just yet instead lets her move, lets himself sink into the heat of her movements. His head falls back against the leather, eyes half-lidded, lips parting slightly as a low groan slips from his throat.

“Fuck”

He breathes out, his grip on her hips tightening, but she swears she isn’t paying attention to his reactions. That was the whole point of this, right? To tune everything out, to focus on the goal, to make this stupid money and leave. But then she hears it—his breath, the slight hitch in it, the way it escapes his throat unbidden, then the quiet groan which follows that he probably hadn’t meant to let out.

It makes her feel hot.

The warmth spreads down her spine, settling deep in her stomach, and before she can stop herself, she presses down harder, grinding against him with just a little more pressure, and maybe, it's not just to please him anymore... Rafe lets out a low, amused hum behind her, and his fingers squeeze at her hips in a way that tells her he noticed—of course, he noticed. “Shit Bunny,” he muses, voice thick, laced with something she doesn’t want to acknowledge.

“Didn’t think you’d enjoy this so much.”

Her stomach tightens at his words, and she clenches her jaw, trying not to react. This is just for the money, she needs to remind herself, it's just a job. But the problem is, she can feel him- straining against his trousers, hot and heavy beneath her, pressing into her just right as she moves.

And for a second, she forgets herself.

Because she isn’t supposed to feel like this. She isn’t supposed to want to hear him groan again, isn’t supposed to feel her thighs clench at the sound of his voice, or let the heat between them seep into her bones. But it’s happening anyway, and she doesn’t know if she can stop it. She barely registers the shift, the way she moves, one moment she’s grinding against him with her back to him, and now she’s straddling him, facing him, legs on either side of his lap.

And he just drinks her in because it’s not just the whiskey that’s intoxicating him anymore- it’s her.

The way she moves, the way she breathes, the way her hands skim up his arms, fingers trailing over the firm muscle of his biceps before settling on his chest. She rolls her hips down again, firmly pushing herself down right where she can feel him. His pupils are blown, fully dark now, the usual sharp blue of his irises nearly nonexistent as he stares up at her, breathing heavier. Then his hands lift, gripping her hips tighter, pulling her forward, until there’s barely any space left between them.

She’s so close

Her lashes flutter as her eyes flicker down to his lips, just for a second, and when they snap back up, he’s already watching her do it, already smirking at the way her breath hitches, at the way her thighs squeeze just slightly around him. His nose bumps against hers, and when he shifts beneath her, pushing his hips up into her, her fingers press harder into his chest, her own hips stuttering. She bites her lip, holding back the sound threatening to escape and he catches it, one of his hands leaving her hips, coming up to her jaw, fingers sliding against her skin just enough to keep her looking at him. His voice is low, barely audible, a whisper that seeps into her skin.

“Tell me to stop…”

Yet she doesn’t say anything

Her hands move instead, fingers working the buttons of his shirt, one by one... Each undone button reveals more of his tanned skin, the warmth of him radiating beneath her touch. She doesn’t stop, doesn’t hesitate for a second, and a deep hum rises from his chest as he watches her, but then he moves- leaning in, tilting his head so his lips find the delicate skin of her neck.  

She sucks in a sharp breath, body tensing for a moment before melting under his touch.  

His mouth trails down, pressing slow, open-mouthed kisses, and then his teeth graze lightly over her pulse point, making her shiver.  Her fingers still against the fabric of his shirt, and then one of her hands moves up, running her fingers up from the nape of his neck to the back of his hair.

“Didn’t think you’d fold so easily”

She lets out a quiet gasp and he smirks against her skin, lips brushing her throat as he murmurs,

“Where’s that loud mouth gone huh?”

His hands slide up her waist, fingers pressing firmly into her skin before one of them finds the thin strap of her bikini top. With a teasing snap, he pulls it back before letting it slap lightly against her heated skin. She jolts slightly, sucking in a breath, and he chuckles low against her throat, lips still working their way along the column of her neck. She doesn't stop moving, rolling her hips against his slightly more desperate now, and he meets her movements, pushing his own hips up in sync. The friction between them is thick, electric, and she feels the heat coil deep in her stomach, something dangerous and exhilarating all at once.

Her hands don’t falter as she slides his shirt down his shoulders, dragging her fingers over the broad muscles underneath before pushing it off completely. It falls to his elbows, and he pulls back just long enough to shrug it off, tossing it lazily over the back of the leather couch. His gaze locks back onto hers, eyes blown wide and unreadable. His hands tighten their grip on her hips, holding her there, keeping her close.

“Still not telling me to stop”

He mutters raspier than before, arousal evident in his tone as her body still presses into his in a way that feels too natural, too inevitable. He knows she feels it too- knows that whatever’s been simmering between them has finally reached a boiling point. His voice is teasing as he tilts his head slightly, lips just inches from hers.

"Is this really just about the money, hmm?"

She doesn’t answer.

Because the truth is, she can’t even think about whatever heat is crackling between them anymore, can’t allow herself to acknowledge it- not when her reality is suffocating her. She’s stuck in something she doesn’t want to be in, something she shouldn’t be in, and for the first time in a long time.

She doesn’t know what to do.

But she pushes it down and keeps moving, keeps rolling her hips down onto his, her hands gripping his shoulders tightly as if she’s trying to ground herself, as if she’s trying to pretend. His hands slide down her waist, rough palms skimming over soft skin before they settle firmly on her ass, squeezing, guiding her against him. And for a fleeting second, she lets herself fall into it- lets herself chase the momentary distraction, the heat of his body against hers, the way his breath pauses when she leans in and presses her lips against his neck.

But it’s not enough.

Because even as she kisses against his skin, even as his hands grip at her, even as her body moves in perfect rhythm with his- she feels it clawing at her chest, pressing in on her lungs until she can’t breathe.

The weight of it all

The desperation

The fear

She swallows hard, blinking quickly, trying to shove it down, trying to pretend it’s not happening. But then her throat closes up, and before she can stop it, her vision blurs. She's silent at first, just trembling shoulders, her fingers tightening against his skin. But then the tears come, hot and fast, slipping down her cheeks before she can catch them, before she can stop them. She squeezes her eyes shut and presses her face further into his neck, her lips brushing against his pulse, tongue gliding over the skin there, but barely. Rafe's eyes are closed when he suddenly feels it- small, warm droplets hitting his skin. It takes him a second to register what it is, his brows furrowing slightly as he clocks the sudden shift in her body language and he stills beneath her,

"What are you doing?"

His voice isn’t teasing anymore. It’s not smug, not taunting. Just… confused and then she crumbles

Right there on his lap.

A sob rips from her throat, and she tries to stifle it, pressing a trembling hand over her mouth, but it does nothing to muffle the sound. Her body shakes, shoulders heaving as she wails, the weight of everything hitting her all at once. She presses her face into the crook of his neck, as if she can disappear there, as if she can hide from hi gaze. Rafe's chest tightens, an unfamiliar pressure building inside him as he stares down at her, completely taken aback, "what the fuck", he mutters to himself his mind suddenly reeling. "Hey—" His voice is hesitant now,

"We can stop, it’s okay—"

But she just shakes her head, violently, desperately, refusing to look at him because she simply can't stop crying. His hands twitch at her sides, unsure of what to do, how to touch her. His mind is racing, trying to piece together what’s happening, why she’s like.... this? He rewinds everything in his head- her walking in, the way she spoke, the way she moved, but only one question keeps plaguing his mind- did he do something..? His hand moves hesitantly up her back, trying to soothe her, trying to ground her, but he feels so out of his depth, he’s not used to this—whatever this is. He murmurs, his fingers pressing lightly against her spine. He doesn't know what else to say, doesn't know how to fix this.

"Shh, hey…"

All he knows is that something in his chest is pulling tight, something he doesn’t understand.

Minutes pass, and the heavy, body-wracking sobs have quieted into something softer, just her breath hitching every so often as she sits there in his lap, unmoving. Her head feels heavy on his shoulder, her weight pressing into him like she might collapse entirely if she weren’t anchored there. Rafe says nothing. His hand moves against her back, rubbing slow, absent-minded circles, his touch surprisingly gentle and she’s just… not sure what to do anymore.

"I'm sorry."

The words are barely a whisper, her voice hoarse from crying, she still can’t bring herself to pull back, to look him in the eye, to see whatever expression is on his face right now. Rafe stays quiet. His other hand, the one that isn't on her back, is thrown lazily over the back of the sofa. He taps his finger against the leather, slow, rhythmic,

Like he's thinking

Like he’s waiting

She presses her lips together, willing herself to get it together, to push this all down the way she always does. Her hand comes up to wipe at her flushed cheeks, fingers brushing away the tear tracks as she straightens up. Pushing herself off his chest, she sits up properly in his lap, her back straight now, shoulders squared. His hand slips off her back, falling away completely as he takes in her flushed face. "I need the money-" she says finally, voice still a little raw but steadier now.

"Cause I need a ferry ticket to Charleston."

Rafe watches her, something unreadable flashing behind his eyes. His arms come to cross over his bare chest, muscles flexing slightly as he leans back against the couch. His brows pull together as he speaks out,

“What’s in Charleston that you can’t find here?”

Her eyes snap up to meet his, narrowing slightly, her body tensing as she sits there still almost naked, in his lap. She bites back, defensive now,

“That’s none of your business,”

“Yeah? Well, considering you just had a meltdown in my lap, I think I’m pretty entitled to know.”

Rafe scoffs, shaking his head in disbelief, and his tone is sharp, edged with something between frustration and curiosity. Her jaw clenches, fists tightening slightly in her lap before she exhales sharply, mumbling something incoherent causing his brows to furrow even deeper,

“Speak up”

“I need to see a doctor.”

His confusion only deepens. He watches her closely now, his blue eyes flickering over her face like he’s trying to read between the lines, trying to make sense of whatever the fuck is going on. His gaze lingers on her pupils for a moment, scanning her like she must be high or drunk because none of this is making sense.

“There’s doctors on the island Maybank”

He points out, slow, deliberate, as though an adult scolding a child. She clenches her jaw, hand coming up to rub the arch of her brow before she mumbles something again, barely audible. His patience thins completely as he bites at her,

“God, can you stop fucking mumbling and just spit it out—”

“I’m pregnant, okay?!”

She bursts, voice loud and sharp as it echoes through the dimly lit room. Rafe’s eyes widened for a split second, caught completely off guard by the outburst. The word crashed into him, heavy, knocking the air from his lungs. Pregnant? For a brief moment, there was nothing but silence between them, a suffocating pause. Slowly, he tilted his head, trying to keep his cool, but the way his jaw locked, the way his fingers flexed against his bicep where his arms were still crossed digging into his skin, betrayed him. His voice came quiet, almost too calm.

“You- you’re pregnant...?”

The words settled in the air between them, so much heavier than anything else that had been exchanged tonight. Y/N’s throat tightened, her eyes burning all over again but she refused to let the tears fall as she forced herself to nod, voice breaking as she whispered,

“Yes”

Rafe sat stiffly, his gaze lingering on her, unblinking, as if waiting for her to take it back. As if he’d misheard. But the weight of her words settled deep in his chest, and he felt something shift- something uncomfortable rising, something that left a bitter taste in his mouth. His eyes narrowed slightly, confusion flickering across his face before something cold crept in, tension crackling in the air between them.

“Whose is it?”

The words slipped out before he could stop them his voice harsh, his effort to stay composed now out the window. A part of him hated that he even asked, but he couldn’t help it. His fists clenched at his sides, his knuckles turning white, though he tried to mask the anger bubbling beneath the surface. Y/N scoffed, shaking her head.

“Are you serious-”

“-are you?”

His voice was tight as he cut her off, edged with something she didn’t like. She could hear the tautness laced through his words, and it only pissed her off more. But beneath her anger something else twisted in her stomach- something that made her uneasy, that made her want to disappear. She swallowed, her pulse thrumming in her ears.

“I-... I don’t know"

The second the words left her mouth, the silence that followed was deafening, worse than when she'd first told him what was going on. The disbelief on Rafe’s face was obvious as he let out a short, almost mocking breath. He shook his head, eyes flicking over her expression as he ran a hand down his face, searching for something- anything- that made this make sense.

“Yeah, right.”

Y/N felt heat rush to her face, a mix of frustration and something deeper—something raw and aching- clawing at her chest- that inescapable pressure. Her arms crossed tightly over her chest, as though protective,

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“You think I believe you don’t know who knocked you up?”

Rafe scoffed, running a hand over his jaw again and her breath hitched. A bitter laugh left her lips, but it didn’t sound like her, not at all.

“Yeah- I don’t fucking know who he was.”

“Right. So you just slept with the guy without even getting his fucking name? Jesus Y/N, I know you’re a stripper, but I didn’t take you as a slu—”

“I didn’t fucking sleep with him!”

Her voice cracked, the force of her words slamming into him like a gunshot. Rafe blinked, his expression shifting into something unreadable, a small laugh of disbelief slipping out.

“Well, how the fuck are you pregnant then?”

“I didn’t sleep with him.”

Her voice was smaller this time, but no less sharp. Rafe was still looking at her, still waiting for an explanation. He didn’t understand. He wasn’t getting it. Y/N felt her throat close up, that overwhelming shame which hadn't reached her yet since it happened, was finally engulfing her now. She finally whispered,

“I don’t even know who he was,”

And then, it clicked.

“...oh”

The realisation hit Rafe like a freight train, knocking the breath from his lungs. His chest tightened uncomfortably. He was still staring at her, his face unreadable, and Y/N felt something cold settle in her chest. The way he was looking at her- it wasn’t disgust, it wasn’t pity, it was just… blank. And it made her panic.

“Fucking say something”

She snapped, voice breaking slightly. Rafe’s mouth parted like he was going to, but then he just… didn’t. He shook his head instead the slightest bit, running his tongue over his bottom lip as he pressed them into a thin line, still silent and she couldn’t take it.

“Fuck this”

She pushed off his lap so fast that at first he didn't even register her weight lifting off of him as she yanked her oversized t-shirt on angrily. “This was fucking stupid,” she muttered, shoving her arms through the sleeves, “Don’t know what the fuck I thought would happen.” She stepped into her shorts, dragging them up her legs quickly as she grabbed her shoes off the floor. By the time she reached the office door, she could hear Rafe finally snapping out of whatever daze he was in.

“No, no- wait! Y/N-”

She didn’t stop.

“I shouldn’t have come here,” she mumbled under her breath as she pulled open the front door, but before she could step outside, a warm hand pressed flat against the wood, shutting it back in place. "Just listen-" his voice spoke out and Y/N turned sharply, staring up at him, still barefoot, shoes gripped in her hand. Both their breathing was uneven, chests rising and falling too quickly from all the sudden movement. Rafe swallowed hard, his blue eyes locked on hers.

“…Let me help, alright?”

She stared at him, trying to figure out if he actually meant it, or if this was just some weird attempt to settle his own guilt. She should just tell him here and now, to give her the money and leave- she was sure it would probably be enough to pay for a ferry ticket to Charleston, a hotel for the night and for an appointment at the... clinic. She bit the inside of her cheek, eyes burning, torn between running and staying, between pretending this conversation never happened and letting him in, because truthfully? She had no one else. Rafe’s voice was quieter this time, steadier, softer.

“Let me help you Maybank.”

Y/N pressed her lips together, exhaling shakily as her hand came up to wipe away a stray tear.

She hesitated, then finally she gave him a small nod.

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[maenefa]

Why does Eowyn want to die?

Because Aragorn won’t love her? Because she feels trapped in her feminine gender role?

These are the explanations we get in the text. However, none of the characters really acknowledge Eowyn’s darkest fear: being taken alive by the enemy.

There are some bad takes on Eowyn that boil down to patronizing her and downplaying the seriousness of her problems. People say that she had a naive desire for glory and Faramir teaches her that war isn’t actually fun. Then there’s the whole “Eowyn was a deserter who selfishly ran away from her duty” argument.

You can only say these things if you ignore how dire the situation was, how close Sauron was to winning, and how gruesome Eowyn’s fate would have been if he won. She knew that death or capture likely awaited her, and she knew that dying in battle was the least bad option. (She also knew her own worth and believed that she was too useful a warrior to be left behind with the civilians. And she was right.)

Eowyn’s actions are ruthlessly practical! She wants to die fighting because that’s better than waiting around for The Horrors. Let’s be real, Eowyn is too sensible to be suicidal over an unrequited crush.

Here are some of her most revealing quotes:

“All your words are but to say: you are a woman, and your part is in the house. But when the men have died in battle and honor, you have leave to be burned in the house, for the men will need it no more.”

“And those who have not swords can still die upon them.”

“Nor is it always evil to die in battle, even in bitter pain. Were I permitted, in this dark hour I would choose the latter.”

“But I do not desire healing…. I wish to ride to war like my brother Éomer, or better like Théoden the king, for he died and has both honour and peace.”

In the end, Eowyn only stops wanting to die after Sauron is defeated. Just before the Ring is destroyed, she tells Faramir:

“I stand upon some dreadful brink, and it is utterly dark in the abyss before my feet, but whether there is any light behind me I cannot tell. For I cannot turn yet. I wait for some stroke of doom.”

Eowyn can’t turn to light and life until the war is over. Hope is too painful; death at least offers “honor and peace.” This passage is so important because it EXPLICITLY links Eowyn’s despair to the outcome of the war and makes it clear that she is not simply having a meltdown because Aragorn rejected her.

There are two important moments where Eowyn is threatened with violence. The very first time we meet her, we are told by Gandalf that Wormtongue planned to turn her into a sex slave after Saruman conquered Rohan. Even though this threat is dismissed quickly, it’s a disturbing reminder of what could happen to Eowyn if Sauron wins.

Then we have the most triumphant moment of Eowyn’s story: her battle with the Witch King. Once again, Eowyn is not threatened with death, but with captivity and torment:

“Come not between the Nazgûl and his prey! Or he will not slay thee in thy turn. He will bear thee away to the houses of lamentation, beyond all darkness, where thy flesh shall be devoured, and thy shrivelled mind be left naked to the Lidless Eye.”

Eowyn laughs at him and makes sure to announce that she is a woman before killing him. Her victory is all the more satisfying because the Witch King has just threatened her with captivity, loss of agency, the violation of her body and mind—all threats that Eowyn has faced before. But the Witch King’s words continue to haunt Eowyn and us. He threatens to withhold death; and death is therefore framed as an escape, a gift. Eowyn is taken to the Houses of Healing, but she is obsessed with returning to battle and fighting until she dies.

When Eowyn says that she fears “a cage,” this is a brilliantly simple metaphor for the entire spectrum of oppression she has faced: from the well-meaning restrictions of her culture to the horrifying enslavement threatened by Wormtongue.

Once the war is over, Eowyn is able to laugh at her fears. She teases Faramir: “And would you have your proud folk say of you: there goes a lord who tamed a wild shieldmaiden of the North!” Her fear of being caged has been turned into a bit of flirtatious banter. She feels completely safe with Faramir, and the idea that he “tamed” her is nothing but a joke between them.

[eowynstwin]

i’m drooling at ur older bf price (not much else to say except when/if u ever have more thots abt him please share 🙏)

previous

You curl in on yourself after sex, sometimes. It’s a pattern Price has noticed—you’ll finish, then he will, and in the humid moments after, the shutters in your eyes will close. You won’t meet his gaze.

He’s only asked once about it, and it had been so clear that the question disturbed you that he hadn’t pressed. You’d tell him, he reasoned, when you were ready—

(And he could nudge you in that direction in the meanwhile.)

The sink is put back together, cabinet door closed. Your sundress is wrapped and twisted around your midsection, naked breasts wet with his saliva and compressed against his chest as you lay panting on top of him. His shirt is in some far-off corner, thrown aside, and his jeans are around his knees.

“That was nice,” he murmurs in your ear, kissing your hair. He makes a home for his fingertips between your shoulder blades, walking the trail of your spine, up and down, slow as a tide.

“Mm-hm,” you say, out at sea. Far away.

He can’t deny that it disappoints him. But it isn’t about him, and he shouldn’t make it so. Even if it is about him, it isn’t actually about him—it’s about something else that has attached itself to him. Things are like that more often than not—deeper, older problems with hooks, the barbed kind that sink in and cling and won’t come out of their own accord.

So he keeps kissing your hair, and he keeps stroking your back. His softened cock hasn’t slipped from you yet, and he makes no move to dislodge it. You nestle closer to him; shift your body over his, a little, just for the feeling of it. He waits for the sigh—the long, steady breath you take after the act, after you’ve found yourself again in wherever it is you go after moments like this.

“This is probably weird to talk about after sex,” you say, and Price’s ears perk up.

“Nothing weird between us, dove,” he encourages. “What’s on your mind?”

You play with his chest hair a little, twirling it around with the manicured ends of your nails. (A manicure he happily paid for.)

“You’re the first man who’s ever given a damn about me,” you mumble into his neck.

“I’m sorry to hear that,” he says honestly. He kisses you again, because he wants to, and because he wants it to comfort you.

“You don’t make me feel stupid for not being able to do stuff on my own,” you continue. “My step—my mom’s husband. He used to make fun of me for, for getting confused about changing my car’s oil. Or he’d get annoyed at me. Or I’d need him to change my tires because I can’t do it on my own, and I’d call him for help, and he wouldn’t pick up the phone.”

“He sounds like a piece of work,” Price comments.

A younger version of himself would have offered to beat the shit out of the asshole. That self’s anger on your behalf sits radioactive in his chest even now—corrosive, roiling, righteous fury, ready to carve your name on whatever offal is left over after Price gets through with him.

But that would be for his own ego, not for you. That has no place here.

“Do you know—” and your voice breaks a little, “do you know how bad it feels when a man who’s supposed to look out for you treats you like you’re an idiot? Like you’re not smart enough to be worth helping?”

“Some,” he says. “It’s an awful feeling. I wish you didn’t know how it felt, dove. I’m sorry.”

He feels something warm and wet drip onto his chest, and your shoulders begin to shake.

It’s not the full-body, wracking cry of catharsis. Just an episode of something longer, something tired. A problem dealt with, over and over again—a wound that reopens sometimes, if it’s pulled the wrong way.

Price gathers you closer, wraps his arms around you tighter. He cups the back of your neck with one hand and murmurs “shhh” into your hair, soothing and quiet, squeezing you against him.

“I’m okay,” you say, a little watery. “Really, I am.”

“I know you are,” he says.

He tilts your face toward his, and kisses the center of your forehead. You meet his eyes with your own, wide and glistening with your tears.

“I’m always gonna help you, dove,” he promises, catching one that falls with the edge of his thumb. “And you can always ask.”

-

No I don’t have daddy issues why do you ask

[pythonmoth]

cw: post-traumatic stress disorder. paranoia. anxiety. panic. overthinking. reader is traumatized and unreliable. explicit suicidal thoughts. mentioned depersonalization. the voices. jealous simon. kissing the homies pt2. author was angry while writing.

× framed traitor f!reader x lt ghost. poly tf141.

text is heavily styled to show reader's panic. if it's difficult to read, I can share the normal version tomorrow. ♡

Part 8

Slow.

That's the only way you can describe how the progress has been for you.

Ever since you fell asleep with Simon on a call, you've been feeling so calm. It's like all the problems disappeared. Your therapist is confused, but glad to see you all happy and content, like never before. Your appetite has come back, your nails have been growing nicely. You give yourself a chance to try on comfortable shoes, a little hesitant to make your toenails hurt, but you can actually walk with them now. They're still a little sensitive, but you're running your errands on your own now. No need to be dependant anymore.

To feel like yourself again has given you so much comfort that you find yourself texting the team properly. Even Gaz has been taking your calls when he's available, which has been great for your mental health, and your heart. Price has been mostly quiet, but you're not surprised, as he's always busy; he mostly just shares updates on missions, like Simon. Johnny has been incredibly funny on the phone, sharing silly things and your mutual hatred towards a new movie has been helping you bond again.

Simon, however...

"Hey, I'm serious! Don't you dare using that fucking tea bag!" Simon grunts from the phone.

You turn to him, laughing as you see him frowning. Simon's unmasked face covers your phone screen, his distaste for the cheap tea bags completely clear. His eyebrows are furrowed together, his mouth curled in a little disgusted snarl. You can only grin, mocking him, lazily patting your hands dry on your pants.

"I've no energy to prepare anything else!" you sigh, dropping the tea bag on the mug, getting closer to the phone to turn the volume up.

Your phone is fighting for it's life resting against a little cookie jar on the isle, your hands still a little damp from doing the dishes.

"Well, if you didn't try to do everything at once, you would" Simon voice retorts. His forehead is covering nearly half of your screen, making it hard to take him seriously.

"I can perfectly do multiple things at the same time".

"The stove".

You turn around to see the stove still on. With a grimace, you turn it off, ignoring his little chuckle as you reach out for your tea and your phone, walking over to the living room. The couch is cozy and fluffy, making you sink into it as if it were a cloud. You drag a blanket over your legs as you smile at the screen, staring at Simon.

"Whatever. Now, what did you have for dinner?"

Ever since that night, this has been your new normal. He has time off, you have a videocall. Really, it's a win-win situation, and it makes you happy, so that's fine. He tells you all about everyone, he tells you about how much he misses you and how much he wants to see you. It makes you smile, genuinely so.

The therapist isn't convinced you're okay yet. She says you're still jumpy, still flinch around people, and she even said you're hyper vigilant. But there's nothing wrong with being precautious, so you don't understand how that's a bad thing. However, you can admit it's a little hard to do things with your hands. It's not that you can't use your hands, because you can, but it makes you feel as if you were in a simulation, as if you were part of a game and you're the point of view for someone else.

Perhaps you should've kept that to yourself.

That's probably why the therapist refuses to allow you to go back. She probably thinks you're crazy, when it happens to everyone. She just doesn't understand.

It's no matter, because they're coming.

Price told you a few days ago that they're finally free, and will be having a few months off unless they're strictly needed. It's been nine months since you last saw them in person, so it makes you feel excited, content!

Tomorrow. They're coming tomorrow.

The best part is that you don't even need to ask what they feel like eating. You know them well enough to know just how much they love meat, so you just have to go out and buy everything.

The air is a more than chilly now, your birthday month coming right up, so you decide to put on your favorite jacket and take your car keys. The drive to the store is calm, the music absolutely blasting your ears, though, your enthusiasm sky high with how much you've missed them these past few months. It makes you giddy, to welcome them, to see them again.

Your therapist has been helping you to identify your emotions, helping you to understand how you are genuinely feeling. And having them over... it makes you a little anxious. Only because you haven't gotten any visitors outside your family and friends, really. Of course you want them there, it's just gonna be new.

In just a few minutes, your car if parked and locked at least five times just to make sure, canva tote bags in hand and then you're walking in the store. You're always making sure to come at a time when there's less people, and you're glad it's keeping up the same. Headphones over your ears, music gently playing on then, you move with practiced ease.

Meat. Vegetables. Pasta.

Meat. Fruit. Meat.

And meat.

They would die if you gave them anything but meat, truly.

You smile to yourself as you carry your things back to your car, your headphones now curled around your neck so you can pay attention to your surroundings, your eyes slyly looking around, turning smoothly whenever you feel someone is looking at you from your back. Your eyes wide open, you fill your car with the groceries, quickly closing it once you're done.

Just for precaution, you look around again before looking inside your car, and as soon as you open the door, you're inside and lo ck in g the car.

Just precaution.

It's dangerous out the re.

You're home the rest of the day, preparing the meals you'll be giving them tomorrow morning. Price did say they'll be arriving at 2pm, so you make sure everything is perfect before going to bed.

That night, you sleep with Simon's breathing next to your ear again, your heart pounding in your chest. The an xie ty keeps on growing, but you're sure it's just giddiness. Really, you're just too excited you can't wait.

The next morning, you almost don't want to get up. The woodpeckers are going crazy with the tree just outside your window, the sunlight hitting your face perfectly from between the curtains and it feels peaceful. Your bed is empty, except for your pillows —and a big plushie of a dragon Johnny got for you a few years ago—, and it's so, so warm you just don't want to get up.

With a sigh, you stand up and quickly get ready to welcome the day, and your friends. You're thankful you made sure everything was ready the day before, because just as you're done blow drying your hair, there's a firm knock on your door.

Surprised, you turn to look at the clock. You didn't even realize you spent so long just staring at yourself in silence. You lost so many hours, when you could've been doing something else!

"Coming!" you yell from your room, jumping down the stairs to the kitchen and turning the stove on.

When everything is already getting heated up, you stand in front of the door, your body suddenly frozen. You're sweating, your heart slowing and then racing in your chest as if it couldn't choose what to do. Your throat is closing up.

You can't move.

Don't open the door.

Run.

Why?

What is happening?

Run.

Another knock makes you snap out of it, but your hands are still shaky as you finally open the door. Your shoulders relax as your eyes fall on Gaz, strong arms instantly wrapping around your middle as Price, right behind him, presses the door against the wall so they can all get in.

Gaz lifts you just enough to make room for the rest.

"Hey, sweetheart. Looking good" Gaz says, beaming, pressing a soft kiss to your cheekbones before letting go of you.

However, you're instantly shutting off again. You don't understand why your legs feel like jelly, why your healed fingernails are throbbing. You don't understand at all why the sudden urge to run, far, far away.

Leave.

Price grins down at you, patting your head and gently gripping your shoulder before side stepping you. "Thank you for having us, kid".

When you look up at Johnny, he's grinning down at you, but you can see the way he quickly catches on your reaction, the way your forehead is covered in sweat, and the way your lips are pursed.

Danger.

"It's good to see you" Johnny says gently, nodding down at you and moving past you very carefully, trying not to touch you.

It feels odd. It feels incredibly off. And there's something weird in the air.

Your stomach is twisting and churning. It's confusing. It's weird. Sulfur? Acid?

Fully focused on trying to understand what happening to you, you're suddenly aware that the burning smell you can perceive is coming from your deep in your stomach.

Fear? Pain? Panic?

Your throat is so closed up you can barely breathe. The fear is making your sight turn a little blurry, your breathing shaky.

Bile. You want to throw up.

When you look up at Simon, your hands clench on your sides, swallowing thickly. It feels so, so wrong to look at him like this, especially when you two are supposed to be okay again, but for some reason, you can't handle looking at him. It's making you feel... off. Odd.

You give him a tight smile and a nod, the giddiness turning ice cold in your stomach.

You bring your hand to your mouth, nibbling on your fingernails.

As soon as they're all inside, door closed behind them, Simon takes his mask off, his eyes fixed on you, frowning.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah. Yeah. I'm okay. Yeah, come on" you reply, maybe a little too quickly, but you don't give him, or any of them, a moment to think about it as you move to the kitchen.

You check on everything by the stove as Johnny fills glasses with wine. It's too early for wine, but with your teeth destroying the growing fingernail on your thumb... you don't really care right now.

"It smells amazing" Price comments, inhaling deeply. He's sitting at the head of the table, looking ready to sink his teeth in anything. If he's oblivious to the tension in your shoulders, or if he's choosing to ignore it, you can't tell. "This is what having a wife at home feels like. All we're missing is a little one".

That manages to make you smile slightly, your shaky hands relaxing at the friendly tone. You reach out to mix the pots, turning to look at him.

"The only little one any of you will be seeing from me is my knee on your balls. Now, be useful and set the table" you grunt. Price raises his hands in surrender and pats Simon's shoulder so they can do as you asked.

It's not the first time they've come, anyway, so they don't have to ask you where you keep things. Johnny stays by the table, claiming he already poured the wine, but he ends up helping Simon and Price with the plates anyway.

Gaz leaves the table to stand right next to you, suddenly smacking the hand on your mouth firmly.

"Stop that shit" he whispers angrily. He's quiet, even gentle with it, so rest don't hear.

"Sorry. I'm... feeling weird" you mumble, forcing yourself to stop.

"Go sit. I've got this" he hums, nudging you with his shoulder until you let go.

You make sure to sit by the isle, just because that ridiculous anxious feeling isn't getting any smaller. If anything, you can jump and cover yourself with the isle, so this place is fine.

As Gaz serves for everyone and they start sitting down again, you nearly jump off the chair when you realize Simon's sitting next to you, instead of where he was sitting on the opposite side of the table.

"Hey, that's my chair. Go sit over there".

You look up to see Simon glare at Gaz, the two of them staring each other down, a silent conversation between the two of them. In the end, Simon simply let's go of the chair and sits away from you again. It helps you relax, but you keep quiet, reaching out to grab your glass of wine.

"Really, though. If you had a kid running around..." Price starts again, his mouth filled with food.

"Back off" Johnny complains, nudging Price still. Price rolls his eyes, waving a dismissive hand. "What a prick".

Simon, however, can't look away from you, paying attention to all of your movements, the way you lean on Gaz, the way you barely seem to be listening.

"If she's marrying anyone here, that's me" Gaz says, suddenly wrapping an arm around your shoulders. "Y'all stand no chance".

It makes you relax, but only a moment, feeling suffocated by their eyes on you, especially with the way Simon's gripping his fork. You hit Gaz on the ribs with your elbow, only to make him let go. He grins, his eyes gentle. You know he doesn't mean it like that, but it's making you uncomfortable again.

"Oi, watch your—" Simon starts, his eye twitching.

"Not playing house by choice, I've been forced to. I'm pretty sure we don't wanna talk about it, so eat up and shut the fuck up" you snap, your tone just shy from screaming at them.

That makes Price's teasing smile die, nodding solemnly, and finally shutting up. You refuse to look at the way Simon and Johnny's faces drop, both of them staring at their plates, suddenly feeling no appetite.

It's an awkward meal, everybody afraid to make a single noise. You can hear the way Simon's munching on the vegetables, you can hear Price's breathing slowing down just the way he does when he's on a mission, and Johnny... he's only mixing his food together, stabbing an innocent carrot.

After a while, when nobody's chewing and nobody even dares breathing, Gaz breaks the silence.

"So..."

The rest turn to him.

Gaz grins.

A movie.

The sun is still high up, but Garrick suggested to watch a movie, and you said yes. In a heartbeat. Really, Simon shouldn't complain if he gets to see you for a little longer. Whatever that means, anyway, because you don't want him near you at all. Fuck, you didn't even let him sit next to you.

All these months, he thought he'd been helping you, he thought therapy was going well, because during the constant videocalls you've been cheerful, your old self. You smiled at him, you laughed. He had made you laugh at his fucked up jokes again.

But this?

Johnny went with Price to buy crisps, soda, more drinks, and sour candies for you. Those two bastards really couldn't handle a single comment and bolted immediately. Pair of cowards. Simon wasn't stupid, he had seen the way Johnny nearly burst into tears, the way Price's jaw clenched, felt his own heart break inside his chest, but he has to sit here and take it. Because he wasn't a coward.

And this?

You're leaning on Garrick. Heavily.

Simon eyes the way Garrick interlocks your hands together, checking on your fingernails. His eye twitches as he hears you talk, both of you fully focused on each other, as if he wasn't there. It's not that that's a new concept for him, he often only talked so much.

But this?

His heart pounds in his chest when Garrick grips your jaw with a hand, kissing your cheek loudly after you pout at him.

It makes you smile.

That's it, he thinks. I'm getting up and I'm beating him up. Who the fuck does he think he is? Stealing my girlfriend right in front of me.

In the end, he only shifts, his face betraying nothing, looking down at his beer, hoping the other cowards arrive soon so he doesn't have to see the way he keeps losing you.

Losing you, all over again. Over a fucked up mistake, for following an order. And the worst part is that he genuinely gets it. Garrick is the only one who didn't hurt you, of course you're okay with his touch and not the rest.

Fucking hell. He wants to stab himself in the gut to end his misery.

But no.

He did that.

There's no changing it.

Simon looks up at the two of you.

His anger dissipates when he hears your soft laugh, Garrick's hand on the back of your neck, keeping you steady as he pokes your side, clearly sharing a silly moment. Simon grimaces and turns away again, sipping his beer.

It takes Price and Johnny half an hour to come back, and Simon couldn't be happier to see them.

With the snacks covering the coffee table and their laps, Simon genuinely tries to ignore the fact that you're still pressed against Garrick's side, happily munching on your sour candy. Johnny's sitting on the floor right between his legs, occasionally feeding him orange gummy bears or crisps. Price, between Garrick and himself, is staring at the movie, seemingly content with sipping on his beer, and stealing some of Simon's gummy bears.

Every time he hears your low laugh, Garrick's hands on you, Simon wants to die. He grips Johnny's shoulder, his nails digging slightly into his skin, trying his best to pay attention to the movie, but he isn't able to understand what it is about. He doesn't know what's happened in front of him for the past hour. He knows how many times Garrick's lips were pressed to your cheek. He knows how many times you laughed with Garrick. He knows how many times you've shifted, closer and closer to Garrick.

He can't do anything but dwell on his own regret, on his anger. His pain.

He doesn't blame you, he doesn't blame Garrick. Hell, he doesn't even blame Price, or Johnny, or anybody else. Just himself.

He could've done this so much better, but there's not much he can do. He needs to be alone with you so he can talk properly, apologize again, but every time he looks at you, even without the mask, you flinch. It doesn't matter how hard you try to hide it, he can see it.

Johnny gets up, snapping him out of his thoughts. He sees him take the empty plate, walking towards the kitchen.

Not even a minute later, Johnny's cursing and there's a shattering sound echoing on the house. Simon stands up, moving to go check on Johnny, but he freezes when you stand up abruptly, your face in complete shock as you walk away, your arm bumping onto the walls as you rush away.

He's torn for a whole second too long, thinking if he should follow you or check on Johnny first, and that's enough for Garrick to beat him to it. Simon can only stare at Garrick follows after you, sprinting.

After a moment of hesitation, he walks over to Johnny. Simon finds him picking up the shattered plate, grimacing when he sees someone walking in.

"Ah, it's you. I tripped" Johnny grumbles, rubbing the back of his neck.

"You hurt yourself".

"Just a tiny cut, 's nothing. Where did she go?" Johnny questions, bringing his thumb to his mouth, sucking a little on the blood.

"I don't know. Practically bolted when you dropped the plate".

Johnny stares at him, blinking. "And what are you doing here? I must've scared her" he sighs, standing up. "Where to?"

"Garrick already went after her".

"So?"

"They're getting along. A lot".

Johnny blinks again.

Smack.

"What the fuck? What was that for now?" Simon growls out, rubbing his head. Johnny shakes his head, still expecting an answer. Simon sighs. "Over there. Come on".

Simon guides Johnny, their feet barely making any noise, used to being quiet and, also, because they don't want to spook you any longer. He finally spots you, the door of the guest bedroom ajar.

He freezes.

Johnny's hand grips his arm, his whispered curse falling on deaf ears.

Simon stands there in complete silence, his blood, and stomach, and his heart and his brain falling to his feet as he can only stare.

Your cheeks are wet with tears but it's barely visible because Garrick's hands are covering them, his lips on yours.

It looks peaceful.

And Simon wants to die all over again.

Johnny quietly shuffles away, but Simon can't look away. Not now.

Garrick pulls away and kisses your cheek, then your forehead, then grips your nose, making you huff, a small smile on your lips. He's grinning, rolling his eyes, as if that kiss didn't just happen.

Simon isn't breathing. He's not even sure he's here anymore. Perhaps he did die, and this is his personal hell.

Must be.

chingue a su madre emilia pérez y todos los involucrados. I was pissed writing this and I wanted chaos.

-ˋˏ✄——————————————————

Masterlist | Part 9

Buy me a coffee

anyway, so there's that ♡ thank you so much for reading!!!

taglist: @euphoricn @lilg101010 @enfppuff @carolchaotic @silas-fanfic-favs @nina-from-317 @an-ever-angry-bi @kittygonap @dorothy-rainbird-deactivated202 @adventurerabby @defronix @sheepispink @iambuttwodaysold @blackhawkfanatic @malevolentghoul @thriving-n-jiving @literallegendicon @echo9821 @angel-bugz @ssc7514 @clickbait-official @hades--baby @blackhawkfanatic @sirbonesly @saki---chan @skeletonsucker @nnsissys @kukavittu @tessakate @honestlymassivetrash @s-a-v-a-n-a-34 @rayrayyio @diseasedclitoris @alex1011sdzfgh @thebumbqueen

[prncssguya]

on hwang in-ho/front man, seong gi-hun and their dynamic.

first, idk why people are getting so upset at other people calling gi-hun dumb, we were told that in the first season. lol being bright is not his strongest trait but he has a good heart and we love that about him. however, he is still an idealistic gullible idiot with a gambling problem. except this time his gambling addiction is backed by a sense of justice and righteousness and he no longer gambles with money, he’s gambling with people’s lives. front man asked a good question at the end of the season, “did you have fun playing the hero?” can we even call gi-hun the hero of the story anymore? he gambled with people’s lives and front man showed him the consequences of his moral heroics.

front man only agreed to help gi-hun with his revolution when he mentioned about "small sacrifices for the greater good". i think he reveled in the fact that the “good guy” was willing to allow a few innocent people to die for the greater good to stop the games, which is exactly what the entire VIP theory is to rid the world of 'trash' to improve the world. notice how gi-hun's moral code and belief also changed, from being "nobody should die" into "yeah small sacrifice is okay as long it's for the greater good" at this point, he just proved that front man's belief is actually valid. AND he gets more of his own people killed in the pointless battle with the soldiers that they had no chance of winning. now he gets to feel responsible for all those deaths and the death of his friend and for whatever additional torture they cook up in the next games (as punishment for the escape attempt).

now on hwang in-ho, i believe he was once a good man and the story he told gi-hun was the truth. but in the end he lost a kidney, lost a wife, a baby, lost his money, got fucked over by the wrong people and got into serious debt and had to play this game to help his wife and probably it was too late to save her. he might have played the games like gi-hun but saw how ruthless and greedy people are and resolved that they don't deserve help

i don’t think in-ho wants/will kill gi-hun, but he wants him to understand things from his perspective and show him that his compassion for the people in the games is foolish. you can tell the frontmen (the old man and in-ho) are extremely fond of gi hun. not only did he protect their original front man when nobody else did, he then won the games and thus their respect as he is now as rich as them. he's no longer "trash", he’s an elite like them. i think they both actually kept tabs on him after he won (i wonder if they do that for all winners? inserting them with gps chips?) because they knew he had not used his reward money and in-ho wanted gi-hun to get on the plane and be happy with his daughter

there’s one interesting aspect of the games that makes front man such a complex character. the fact that they’re operating a organ transplant trafficking network. in a way, he’s creating some good to come from a really fucked up situation. but is it really for the good of others who desperately need it, people like his wife, like his brother? or is it just a money making scheme?

either way, i don’t think there is going to be a redemption arc for in-ho, he’s too far gone. we may get to see more of his human side if he manages to see jun-ho again. the only time we’ve seen genuine emotions from him was when he shot his brother like he seemed distraught

the real cliffhanger for me, is will gi-hun stay true to his belief that people can be good, or will he be forever changed into a villain and become the next front man…? after the events of this season i don’t see how his will doesn’t shatter. he’s witnessed how humanity consistently chose money over survival, he’s lost two close friends, his mother, abandoned his daughter. he has gained nothing from wanting to stop the games and this clearly feels like an origin story for the next front man. it’s clear the front man has won this round and i think squid game will either die with 001 or continue with gi-hun as game master

another thing i find funny that i don’t see many mention is how gi-hun is like the luckiest guy in the fucking world. but i don’t think him being alive this long is plot armor, it makes sense. the games exist for the entertainment of rich sadists who have so much money they don't know what to do with it (remember what old 001 said in s1 about life being no fun for both people with no money and people with too much money). and i’d imagine killing hundreds of poor debt-ridden fools year after year gets boring. especially when said fools are desperate enough to gamble with their lives because they think they can beat the system by playing better than everyone else and surviving and getting the money.

gihun is different because he got the money, got out, and still came back. not because he's unfeeling or because he wants more money, but because he's still convinced he can beat the system.

if you're a rich bored gazillionaire, would you rather watch some randos die or would you rather watch this exceptional idiot fail again and again until he learns that his ideals are meaningless and people are inherently greedy and equality is a myth and people at the bottom of the barrel don't get to question the system?

if you're an asshole gazillionaire, you don't want someone to challenge you and just get away with it. you want to hand them 45.6 billion won and make them go away quietly, traumatized, after breaking them psychologically by making them do horrible things until they understand they're just powerless "horses". if they insist on challenging you and your system and your beliefs (money = boundless power), you teach them a lesson and show them their place in the most manipulative and cruel way possible. if gihun dies right away, that's boring. so he can't die, he needs to suffer. he needs to concede defeat.

also, i find it funny how people are comparing hwang inho and gihun dynamic to hannibal and will graham. makes sense, their whole cat and mouse game, front man hiding his true nature from gi-hun the same way hannibal does, trying to corrupt the righteous protagonist, sowing chaos, testing him and observing his behavior like a lab rat, the crazy tension and staring contests, the gaslighting and manipulation. and with the fact that they think lee byung-hun looks like mads mikkelsen. i never put the two of them together but now i can’t unsee it lol