#'and it only leaves at 5am or 5pm'

[shitty-check-please-aus]

you can track how loudly I’m missing my friends in other cities/states based on me complaining about the lack of railroad infrastructure in the united states

[alcorian-cycle]

my take on batfam sleep schedules (and everything else they do)

bruce

10pm - 5am : patrol [7hr] 6am - 2pm : sleep [8hr] 3pm - 9pm : work from home, sometimes dinner with the kids [6hr]

bruce has the benefit of being able to choose his own work hours and work from home. still, he pushes himself round the clock to keep on top of his life as both batman and bruce wayne. his sleep is perfectly optimized and scheduled; not a minute more than he thinks he needs to operate at peak functionality.

dick

11pm - 4am : patrol [5hr] 5am - 1pm : sleep [8hr] 2pm - 10pm : work [8hr]

dick works full time, and his body naturally needs a lot of sleep, so regretfully, rather than cutting into his sleep time he cut into patrol time to make his schedule work. ideally, he'd be sleeping closer to 10 hours, but he can't afford it.

jason

6pm - 1am : work [7hr] 2am - 11am : sleep [9hr] 12pm - 5pm : whatever he wants basically [5hr]

jason has the least time crunch, because he's the only one whose "night job" actually pays. he has a pretty passive income as a crime lord. he just needs to go out every so often and remind the streets why they pay up to him.

tim

2am - 6am : patrol [4hr] 7am - 3pm : school [8hr] 3pm - 6pm : homework & hygiene/food [3hr] 6pm - 1am : sleep [7hr]

tim is not doing so well. i hc that tim is anemic and suffers from chronic fatigue, so he needs way more sleep than he is getting. he cant negotiate his class times, and he needs to do his homework in order to pass. he's not willing to cut patrol time down past 4 hours, so that leaves him with really not quite enough time to sleep. he's married to caffeine.

duke

11pm - 6am : sleep [7hr] 7am - 3pm : school [8hr] 4pm - 8pm : patrol [4hr] 8pm - 11pm : food, homework etc [3hr]

duke is only managing because he's okay with a shorter daily patrol and doesnt need as much sleep as tim. he's also the only batfam member who actually sleeps at night.

damian

10pm - 5 am : patrol with bruce [7hr] 5am - 6am : nap [1hr] 7am - 3pm : school [8hr] 4pm - 9pm : sleep [5hr]

damian does all his homework at hyperspeed during study hall and in the car driving to and from school. because he is insane. damian also has the ability to powernap like the dead. that 1hr actually does something for him.

cass

9pm - 6am : patrol [9hr] 7am - 4pm : sleep [9hr] 5pm - 8pm : whatever she wants basically [3hr]

cass, like jason, doesnt have a big time crunch due to being unemployed and not in school. yay! she used to spend time trying to learn to read and write, but it was just frustrating for her so eventually they decided she should quit.

you may notice that there is not a single time when they are all awake and available to have a family meal. they have to plan those well in advance. its a whole event.

[so-much-for-stardust6]

You’re My True Love- Damon Albarn

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summary: your best friend damon confesses to you out of nowhere to which you sort of panic about. after not speaking for weeks, you finally realize how you truly feel about him.

lowercase intended

warnings: none (at least i don’t think)

a/n: i’ve had this idea sitting in my notes app but now i’ve finally written it 🙏 once again i wrote this at 3am and proof read it at 5am so pls bare with me

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damon albarn. a very unforgettable name. the name of my best friend. we’ve been best friends since high school and life has only brought us closer. our love for music is what bonded us in the first place, so it makes sense that he’d start his own band named blur. i’ve been his number one supporter since day one. we’re like two peas in a pod. but maybe damon wanted to be more. i finished the last touches to my outfit, smiling at myself in the mirror when i decided i looked good. damon asked to hang out today, saying he needed to tell me something. i figure it’s about his band like how his usual news would be. i grab my keys and head out my door, making sure it’s locked before leaving my apartment building. getting into my crappy old car and driving to the meeting spot felt like a blur (no pun intended) since i arrived quickly.

i see damon’s figure sitting at a table outside this cafe we always go to, sipping what i assume is tea. i get out my car, quietly walking up behind him to surprise him. i place my hands over his eyes, causing him to jump at the sudden touch.

“hey you.” i say.

“hello, y/n. figured that was you.” he chuckled, turning his head to look at me.

“ordered already?” i ask while sitting down across from him.

“just this tea, i’m waiting for you.”

“such a gentleman.” i giggle.

i pick up the menu and scan the lunch options, finally landing on getting a simple blt.

“so anything new with the band? is that what you called me here for?”

“uh, not exactly.” he awkwardly scratches the back of his head.

i raise an eyebrow in confusion.

“did something bad happen? are you okay?”

“yes, i’m okay. it’s nothing bad. well, it just depends on how you feel about it.”

“oh come on dames, spit it out already. can’t keep a girl waiting.” i joke.

“i’m in love with you.”

my smile immediately falls and i sit there process his words. in love with me? he stared back at me, thinking on how he wants to bash his head in at his confession that he knew he should’ve kept secret.

“y/n…?” he whispers, trying to catch my attention.

i was zoned out at this point, trying to look back at memories of us and assume when his love for me started.

“you’re in love with me?”

“yeah, i am. i-i’m sorry, i know it’s weird for me to feel this way but i can’t help it. you just complete me perfectly.”

i stay silent again, still dissecting his words. i lightly tremble at his words, not knowing how to react.

“i have a boyfriend, damon.”

“that’s exactly why i didn’t want to confess. but my love for you has grown so much recently and i needed to tell you before we leave for tour.”

“stop saying that word.”

“what word?”

“love.”

a look of heartbreak flashed across his face, sitting back in his seat to look at me.

“i-i gotta go. i can’t do this right now.” i suddenly spoke up.

i was quick to scoot out my chair and book it to my car, leaving a hollering damon behind. i heard him call out my name but i ignored him. i shakily opened my car door, stumbling inside. i even dropped my eyes onto the floor as i tried to start the car, my nerves at an all time high. i sped out the parking lot and on my way back home, leaving my seatbelt off. i don’t even know why i did that, i regret doing that. it was all just so sudden, he didn’t even sugarcoat it. my best friend is in love with me. what the fuck?

it’s been a few weeks since the whole scene happened. i’ve tried to ring damon and apologize but he never picked up. i even tried stopping by his place but he was never home when i came. it was 5pm as i sat in my apartment’s kitchen, sipping my tea while reading some book my cousin suggested to me. i was paying no attention to the man i called my boyfriend who was causing a ruckus. he came over to go out but i informed him that i’d rather stay in, something he was against. after trying to convince me to go out and me saying ‘no’ every time, he finally gave in and stayed in with me. but with him being the type of guy to pick out every flaw he saw, he ran around my apartment and rearranged things. he claimed his “interior designer” side was coming out.

i was quite annoyed to say the least, just wanting to relax today but now dealing with an idiot ruining my decor. i don’t understand why i was putting up with him anyways, i could easily kick him out. suddenly, the phone rang which caused me to jump and slightly choke on my tea. i coughed as i head towards the phone, hoping to beat my boyfriend in grabbing it.

“hello?” i speak out, voice cracking a bit.

“hey y/n, it’s me graham.”

“oh hello! what’s up?”

“who’s that?” my boyfriend comes storming into the living room.

“my friend.” i whisper, covering the microphone.

“which friend?”

“can you go away, i’m trying to have a conversation.” becoming annoyed with him very quickly.

“hello?”

“yeah, sorry, i’m here. what’s going on?”

“i just wanted to let you know that we leave for tour tonight around 1. i know that you and damon haven’t spoken in a couple weeks but maybe you’d want to see him?”

“i don’t know gra, i don’t think he wants to see me. i feel so guilty on how i reacted, i just didn’t know how to take in the new information i got.”

“i understand, y/n. think it over, okay? the van picking us up is gonna stop at my place last, if you wanna stop by.”

“i’ll think about it. thank you, graham. i really appreciate it.”

“of course, y/n. bye bye.”

“bye.” i hang up the phone.

“graham? is that a guy?”

“can you just stop? he’s a FRIEND. nothing more.” i walk past him to go sit back down.

“that’s what they all say.”

“well maybe try to think that i’m not like everyone else.” i sip my tea.

he says something back but i’ve already tuned him out. after 30 minutes or so of him ranting on about whatever, he finally left. i let out a breath of relief, the reason for my headache gone. i stand up and head towards my room to get ready for a shower. i pick out some random bedtime clothes to wear, my eyes landing on one of damon’s shirt. it was a summer night and we decided to go to this lake for a nice swim. it wasn’t so nice when my swimsuit top got lost in the water somehow. so being the gentleman he is, damon lended me his shirt and i guess i just never gave it back. the smile i wore on my face was a sad one, the thought of damon and i’s friendship being ruined all because of my stupidity.

i shake away those thoughts and go shower, something i desperately need. afterwards, i decided a nice relaxing movie night with wine would finish this night off perfectly. i plopped the vhs in and sat on the couch with a glass of wine. my mind kept thinking back to moments where i watched the movie with damon, laughing loudly at the scenes. my heart ached as i kept thinking of damon. i was able to finish the movie and wine, deciding to call it an early night. after shutting the tv and lights off and locking all the windows and door, i settled down in bed. it didn’t take long for me to snooze off. suddenly, i woke up on a familiar couch in a familiar place.

“good morning, sleepyhead.” damon’s voice rang out.

“damon? how’d i get here?”

“what do you mean? you stayed the night, silly.” he poured himself a cup of coffee.

“b-but i was in my own room?”

“thinking about me again, huh?” he smirked his infamous smirk.

“how’d you know?”

“cause this is a dream. and i’m obviously in your head, so i can see what you think of. why are you thinking so much of me? you were the one who ran off that day.” he leaned against the doorway of the kitchen.

“i-i don’t know..”

“that’s not a real answer. look deep inside your heart, y/n/n.”

“well, i feel guilty. i feel guilty for leaving you alone. i don’t know why i did it.”

“you clearly do.”

“i do?”

“what do you keep thinking of.”

“old memories.”

“and how do they make you feel?”

“fuzzy inside. they make me smile when i see you smile. it makes me want to see you smile again.”

“what else, love?”

“oh don’t call me that, you know how it makes me feel.”

“and describe how it makes you feel.” his words guiding me.

“it makes me feel all giddy inside. my stomach goes crazy with butterflies. like i like it. actually, i love it.”

“what else do you love?”

“you.” i blurt out.

my eyes widen at the realization. it all makes sense, the sudden thoughts of him and the stomach flips.

“i’m in love with you too, damon.” i look up at him.

“don’t tell me that. go tell real damon that, silly.” he chuckled, sipping his coffee.

“shit! they leave tonight, i gotta wake up.”

and so i did, my eyes shooting open. i quickly sat up in bed, turning my head to look at the clock that read 12:37am.

“shit!”

i stumble out of bed, struggling to find socks to put on. i didn’t care about my pajamas, i just needed to see him. i slip on my shoes and ran towards the door. but i made a quick pit stop by my phone.

“hello?” my boyfriends voice rang out on the other side.

“hey, it’s me. i just wanted to call real quick to say that i’m breaking up with you. it isn’t working out and i don’t see us progressing in the future. i gotta go but i’m very sorry.” i then hung up before he could even speak. i ran up to my door, making sure to grab my keys on the little table next to it. the sound of my phone ringing made me grimace, sorry but i cannot answer.

i ran down to my car, speeding off again with no seatbelt. my brain struggled as i tried to remember graham’s address, i’ve only been a couple times. i finally reach a familiar street and see his house. a breath of relief left my mouth as i saw a van still parked outside. i parked very crappy but i didn’t care. i rush out my car, looking both ways before running across the street.

“alex! alex!” i call out to the bassist.

“y/n? what are you doing here?”

“i need to see damon.”

“uh, he’s inside with graham. wha-“

“great thank you!” i cut him off.

i didn’t hesitate to run inside, seeing suitcases at the door. two voices echoed from upstairs, assuming that they’re damon and graham.

i run upstairs, all the running causing me to be out of breath. i make it to graham’s room where they’re both at. they don’t notice me standing in the doorway as they spoke.

“so, i told y/n to come tonight.”

“what? why?”

“you guys need to talk.”

“she doesn’t want to talk to me. she hates me because i’m in love with her. she’ll continue to hate me cause i can’t change how i feel about her.”

“she said she tried calling you, mate.”

“i-i felt embarrassed to talk to her again. hearing her voice again would do things to me and if she hates me then it’d make things worse.”

“i don’t hate you.” i spoke up.

the two boys whip their heads to look at me.

“y/n..”

“damon i’m so sorry. i-i don’t know why i left that day. it was just so sudden and my brain couldn’t comprehend that you feel that way towards me.”

“i’m gonna go.” graham quietly said, fast walking out of the room.

“why did you walk off?” his voice laced with sadness.

“it was too much. which isn’t a valid answer but i honestly don’t know.”

“is your view of me different now? i-is our friendship ruined?”

“what? absolutely not dames, you’ll forever be my best friend.”

“only your best friend?”

i try to find the right words to confess to him, my brain running empty.

“i’m in love with you too.” i blurt out just like how he did.

“w-what?”

“i kept thinking about you after our last encounter and it’s weird to say but i had a dream that made me realize that i love you. our memories make me all happy to think of you, be around you. you make me all fuzzy inside when you do things. and no one could make me feel that way, only you can. you’re my true love, damon. and i’m sorry i didn’t realize when you told me but i-“ i was cut off by damon’s lips.

i was caught off guard, standing there in shock as he held my face. slowly my lips started moving with his and my hands held his face. that fuzzy feeling covered my entire body, i was entirely numb and his touch felt like fire to me.

he pulled away, fast breathing coming out his parted spit covered lips.

“come on tour with me.”

“what?”

“come on tour with me. i want you with me all the time.”

“damon, i’m not really packed for that.”

“so? i’ll buy you clothes and everything else you need. just please, please come with me.” he begs.

he lets go of my face to grab onto my hands, thumb stroking the top of my hands. i thought about it long and hard. not a single ounce of regret crossed my mind.

“okay. i’ll come with you.”

“really?” he smiled brightly.

“yes, really.” i smile back.

“i love you so much.” he leans back in for a kiss i definitely wouldn’t decline.

“hurry up damon! we gotta leave, mate!” dave yelled from downstairs.

“guess we gotta get going.” i say as i pull away.

he grabs a suitcase off the floor and grabs onto my hand. he leads us down the stairs and out graham’s house.

“y/n is coming with us and there is going to be no argument about it.” damon announces.

“she better do some type of work.” dave said.

“i’ll deal with unloading your shit, okay?”

“deal. welcome to the tour life.” he points to the bus.

“oh my, very fancy.” i giggle.

i help damon pack his stuff into the back of the van. we shove ourselves inside the van, cuddling up as it was quite chilly outside.

“i’ll have to ring my sister to come get my car.”

“how would she get in?”

“i left my keys under a plant pot on gra’s porch.”

“well aren’t you smart.” he pokes my cheek.

“very.” i give him a cheeky smile.

i turn my attention to the window, watching as houses fly by. damon rested his head on my shoulder, falling asleep already. i smile to myself at this sudden change in my life. it may be sudden but it’s definitely not bad.

[httpscomexe]

Muzzle

Summary: You can’t lock up a Stark.

(Find what I'm currently writing by checking my pinned post)

Parings: Bucky x Reader (Some Winter Soldier POV)

Warnings: Stalking, kind of kidnapping, mentions of past violence, individual warnings per chapter.) It will start becoming 18+ next chapter.

Tags: @scott-loki-barnes @cjand10

Word Count: 2898 (Find all chapters here) Chapter 4

The Winter Soldier's POV

5AM, she’s awake, the sound of her alarm bringing her out of her head. She stretches for about 5 minutes before ultimately deciding she’s not getting up yet.

5:30AM, she wakes up again, but this time to the sound of a bunch of students outside her door. She stretches for about 5 minutes, and by that time the hallways are more relaxed, so she slowly gets out of bed, then goes into the bathroom to shower, brush her teeth, and do her hair. Along with anything else she might do.

By 6AM she’s out of the bathroom, and she goes to her little kitchen area to make herself something to eat. Every Monday it was a sandwich, but other days it was anything she could find from instant noodles to leftover lasagna.

6:15, she’s getting dressed for class.

6:30 she’s swinging her bag over her shoulders and she’s out of her dorm. And that’s when I make my move and climb through the window.

I leave the tree that’s right next to her window, all I have to do is reach over and lift it up since she thinks it’s useless to lock considering she’s on the third floor, so chances are, no one would be able to break in. Except me.

She’s different. There’s something about her that neither me or the Winter Soldier can understand. I know I had clear instructions to kill anyone on sight, and the plan at three in the morning was to shoot her then give myself stitches, but as soon as her eyes locked onto mine, I knew I wouldn’t be able to hurt her.

I’ve gone through her drawers, and learnt just about everything about her. Her name is Y/N, but none of her papers had her last name on it, and her ID was always with her so I never got to learn her last name, but soon I’d learn it from her personally. I just didn’t understand why her last name was so hard to find.

I haven’t been caught yet by her, I know her schedule like the back of my hand. She leaves her dorm at 6:30AM for her first class, then she comes back at 5PM every day, when her social battery finally runs out, but I’m normally out of the dorm room by 4:30.

Today though, she hadn’t come back like usual. I waited, and waited, and waited. I hadn’t been able to watch her yesterday, I had something that needed to be attended to. So when she hadn’t been in the bed this morning I was already confused. I wanted to assume that maybe she had gone to a party, gotten drunk, and stumbled into some boys bed, but she wasn’t like that. So I checked the camera I hooked up in her room, only to discover she had left with a few familiar faces, including Nick Fury. Now I don’t want to be considered a threat to the Avengers or to S.H.I.E.L.D, but if they lay a single hand on her, I won’t hesitate to blow out even Steve Rogers brain. She. Is. Mine…

Your POV

“Well, Ms. Jasper.” Agent Ross says. “Now we definitely know you’re hiding something.”

“Pretty sure my record is clean.”

“Oh yea it is. But maybe don’t use the name your father told you to use as an alias.” He tells you, sliding the tablet they had been using to look up your name over to you. On the screen was a clear image of your information, you had hacked into government systems when you were around the age of 10, and you had added your fake name to the systems in order to live your fake life. “I asked Stark to look it up, he swore he recognized the name, and your middle name gave it away. I mean come on. ‘Jasper Anthony Stark?’ Your father gave you that middle name for the sake of his own ego, no one else would do that.” He crosses his arms. “So Stark will be down here in a few minutes to talk to you, Y/N.” He finishes, then collects his belongings and leaves the room. Leaving you alone with Ned.

“You’re the smartest and also the absolutely stupidest person I know Y/N.” Ned whispers, hoping the A in the AV system wouldn’t pick up on him, which you were sure it would.

“Well just because I’m smart doesn’t mean I make good decisions. I mean look at me.” You uncross your arms and hold them out to make a point. “I’m not exactly a normal teenager.” You tell him, then lower your tone to a volume you know their system won’t pick up on. “I literally kill and torture people for a living!”

“Stark is on his way now.” A voice says over the speaker in the corner.

“Do you still have that bracelet I gave you?” You ask Ned, referring to the friendship bracelet that read ‘BFF’ on his wrist.

“Yea, why?”

“Hey, Ned.”

“Hey Mr. Stark.” Ned's voice raises by about 20 octaves as soon as Tony Stark enters the room. Then instead of doing something normal like I don’t know sitting on the chair, he awkwardly sits on the table, one leg on, one leg off.

“Now I was told that someone in this room is of high importance.” He says, staring directly at you. “I’m assuming it isn’t Ned, he’s just spider man's friend.” Ned voices a sound of disappointment, causing you to look over at him then you stare at the floor, not able to look your dad in the eyes any longer.

“Well I uh, have some really important work I need to do. So I think your guys should totally give me a ride back to my dorm.”

“Or you can actually look and speak to me like I’m your dad.”

“Except you're not.” You spit out, your voice laced with hatred. “You’ve done nothing but cause me pain ever since I’ve left you and you haven’t even made the slightest effort in the past eight years to try and find me.”

“Haven’t made an effort? I have been sending fucking search teams to France for fucks sake Y/N. It’s not my fault you’re good at hiding.”

“I’ve never left Manhattan.” You say plainly. “Unless it’s for work, but I’m in school right now so I don’t have work.”

“Where are you working?”

“None of your business, I’m 18 and a freshman in college.”

“You’re my daughter.”

“You sure as hell don’t act like I am.”

“How the hell did you manage to survive eight years on your own?”

“Someone took me in.”

“A piece of shit may I add.” Ned says suddenly, breaking the back and fourth between you and Stark.

“Oh yea how so?” Stark asks Ned.

“Well-” Your hand quickly covers his mouth, preventing him or at least making sure he couldn’t say whatever he was about to say.

Yea, you told Ned a majority of the abusive, and traumatizing things that happened to you while you were being cared for by a man named Ezekiel, or you at least had a roof over your head and were fed. Most days.

“So I would assume he wasn’t a good caretaker?”

“He’s my dad, that's all you need to know.”

“Pretty sure that’s my title.”

“Not after you abandoned me.”

“Abandoned you?”

“Uh huh.”

“Mr. Stark. Ms. Potts is calling, would you like me to answer or are you busy?” A new voice came over the speakers, it sounded like Jarvis.

“Yes you can answer, I’m done in here, and give strict instructions to everyone in the building to not let this girl out, Ned you can leave whenever, preferably now.” Stark says quickly before standing up. “Hey, hun, what’s up?” You hear him say, assumingly speaking to Virginia, and you turn your head as Ned speaks again.

“Family reunion, yay.”

About a week passed. You weren’t allowed to leave the tower, but you were given a small room to call yours. It had a bed, and a TV hanging on the wall across from it. It also had an amazing view from the city since one of the entire walls was a window, luckily, Stark is a tech geek so the windows can dim if you need some darkness. There was also a small bathroom and a walk-in closet, with all the little necessities you would need and a bunch of clothes.

You weren’t allowed to go to school, but Stark found a way for you to do everything online, which you hated.

You hated not being able to see your friends. You hated not being able to blast your music in your ears in class, or staying up until three in the morning missing your pink little toy. After doing nothing but complaining, they tried endlessly to offer you things like tablets and other expensive items to get you to shut up.

You settled with a pet fish. A cute little betta fish, she was white but she looked chrome when she swam around in her tank, a big one, which was another thing you had asked for. You named her Penelope, and she was the only thing keeping you sane.

“How’s the fish?”

“Her name is Penelope.” You told Sam Wilson as he just walks into your room, no knocking or anything. You don’t bother looking up from your tablet that you were drawing on as he enters.

“Well how is she?”

“Fine.”

“How are you?”

“Fine.”

“Do you need anything?”

“Fine.”

“Are you gonna actually say anything other than fine?”

“Fine.”

“Okay.” He sighs heavily and walks in front of Penelope's tank. “You know, part of the deal on you having this fish was you cooperate with us.”

“There’s nothing to cooperate on, you all know I’m his daughter, you just won’t let me go.”

“We won’t let you go cause you’re the only civilian we know that’s been in contact with Barnes and the only Civilian he seems to listen to.”

“Just a coincidence.”

“It can’t be a coincidence, Y/N.” He tells you, stepping close to your bed where you were sitting so you power off your tablet and look at him. “I don’t think you understand what it means when we tell you he can’t control his emotions when he’s being fucking brainwashed.” He gets closer, until he can whisper and you’ll still hear him. “So you better start talking little girl.” His tone threatens. “This man is a menace and a threat to society. Where. Is. He.”

“I. Don’t. Know.” You tell him, getting in his face to match his anger, you couldn’t voice how genuinely annoyed you’ve been over the past week, with the constant same questions you’re almost forced to make up a lie and tell them you’ve been hiding Barnes up your ass.

“You have a lot of fucking nerve, and I’d like to know where the hell you got it from.” He spits in your face as he speaks and it makes you wanna do nothing more than kick his future generation while you still have the chance.

“You learn to defend yourself when you’re in the streets while everyone else your age is singing the ABC’s.”

“Yea well I guess only good kids learn their ABC’s.” Sam tell you almost under his breath, then he taps Penelope’s fish tank two or three times before leaving your room, closing the door behind him, then you quickly get back into your tablet.

You close the drawing you had started and you go back into the coding for the towers security system that you had gotten into fairly easy. This way you could see everything, from the position of every security guard and Avenger, to every code that every camera was given, and you finally planned your way out, which would finally happen tonight so you could get back to your normal life.

“Where is she? How could she had possibly gotten out? I had every guard, every Agent, and every fucking Camera focused on her room.” Tony Stark's voice could be heard from across the lobby of the tower as he walks next to Steve Rogers and Happy Hogan.

“Well sir, it says here that she had hacked into the system, matter of fact she’s been doing it for a few days now.” Happy says through closed teeth, slightly annoyed after being pulled out of a very important meeting with quite literally the vice president. “And here it says…” He uses his index finger to gently push his glasses back down on his nose, and he looks down at the paper receipts. He decided it would be best to print out everything since apparently ‘paper cannot be hacked,’ even though what's on the papers is what was on the computers. “She basically got in, figured out the routes of every guard, figured out everyone's schedule, and then found out she had exactly one minute, thirty seven seconds, and six hundred and eight milliseconds of a window at exactly eleven thirteen at night.”

“She’s really fucking fast if she’s able to make it down from the thirteenth floor to the first floor in less than two minutes, while avoiding every bit of security I have.”

“Well like I said, she found a window, and it was exactly one minute and-”

“Thirty seven seconds, I know.” He groans. “I just can’t believe I have a ‘window’ in my security. Rogers?”

“Yes, Stark?” Rogers slows the three of them down to stop at the snack counter, grabbing a red, white, and blue donut which he takes a huge bite of.

“How would you suggest we fill this supposed ‘gap’ in our security?”

“Well you could hire two more men, and then set different shifts for everyone.”

“Two men? Why two?”

“Well, for every shift change there’s always two men.”

“Always two men huh? Well go ahead and tell one of the pairs that they’re gonna be alone, I don’t feel like hiring anyone.” Stark tells Rogers, but Steve just gives Happy a look and a nod, obviously not going to listen to Stark as they watch him approach the snack counter and ask them for his favourite donut.

“Do you have any more donuts with red, white, and blue sprinkles?”

“Ugh, finally.” You stretch and undo your hair as you finally get back to your dorm room after a whole week. You feel for the counter in the dark, then use your muscle memory to just make your way back to your bed, the one you so genuinely missed. “GAH! What the fuck!” You scream as you plop down onto the bed and quickly fall off as you land on something hard, then you quickly reach over to turn on the bedside lamp. “No.” You say quickly as the familiar blue eyes meet yours. “You need to get out, I want nothing to do with you.” Stressed, you run your hands through your hair before reaching for the man and trying to pull him out of your bed.

“Hey come on, calm down.” You freeze.

“Did you just say a full sentence without it sounding like it was scripted.” You stayed frozen, your fists were clutching both the centre of his chest and his bicep.

“Yea I’m a bit more normal when I’m not being brainwashed.” He tells you, and you gently let go of him.

“Wait, how many times have you slept in my bed without me being here?”

“Only this week.”

“And with me being here.”

“Only after you’ve had a long day.”

“That’s not nice to know.” You admit, still staring down at him before he finally sits up.

He wasn’t wearing his muzzle and he wasn’t dressed in a thick tactical vest like the two times you’d last seen him. Instead he was wearing a red henley, a dark T-shirt underneath, some jeans, and a heavy green jacket. You also noticed the filled black bag sitting on the floor next to the bed. “I kinda still need you to leave.”

“I don’t wanna.”

“Yea well sucks, I need you too.”

“Baby why are you shaking?”

“Shaking? I’m not- baby- shaking? Wait baby what?” Your brain absolutely fails, then he stands up, easily towering over you as he stares down into your eyes.

“Who’s the one that sounds weird when they talk now?” He asks you, and you want to back talk with a thousand sarcastic remarks, but the second your lips part, your voice is caught in your throat as the side of his index finger rests under your chin. “Now where have you been?”

“I-” You stutter. “The Avengers think I’m in control of you.”

“They think you are? You mean they know you are?”

“What? But I’m not.”

“No I’m not… what’re you talking about?” You ask, and he leans down, resting his forehead on yours.

“Doll, from the moment I walked into your dorm the first day I saw you, I have not been able to get you off my mind. I was the Winter Soldier when I walked into your room the first time, I wasn’t James.” His hands gently cup your face.

“You are in control of my every thought and my every move.”

[whatspringdoestothecherrytrees]

The October Make-Over 🎃

Hello Girlies, this is my October Makeover - feel free to join me if you want! And to customize to whatever you’re working on! (And that could be rest and recovery too!) @mamabeatnik @anolderlove @2pretty @abeatingheart @alicedowntherabbithole-blog

Hyperfocus October: 🍁 🧠

Keep a running distractions notepad.

Put your phone in airplane mode +/- Do not Disturb.

Keep phone in a drawer/bag, different room, etc.

NO TEXTING BEFORE 5pm UNLESS CRITICAL/EMERGENCY (only exception is texting brother and spouse)

List your distractions. (For me: non-critical busywork tasks, email, depressive states, baby stuff, fighting, gossiping, thinking about my traumatic past lol, worrying about the future, finances and budgeting, low self esteem thoughts, having too many metaphorical “irons in the fire”, not exercising and then having lack of focus/energy/positive mood, Fear of success)

Action October: 🍁

Go live with that project you’ve been putting off. (For me it’s my music Youtube channel. Find an equivalent project for yourself! What are you afraid of doing but want to do? Is shame holding you back like it is for me?)

Remember: You will never be perfect to your standards! You just have to do it. Perfectionism is a form of fear.

Take action on that thing you’ve been complaining about/feeling trapped about. (For me: Actually hire a sitter to have actual date nights/mornings/etc! Rather than mentally complain that “you never get time with ur spouse anymore blah blah”.)

Accountability October:

Make a physical, visual workout tracker for the month to see your progress and consistency over time

Have Friday evening check-ins for a budget, calendar, admin

Zero gossiping!

Zero negativity! Say 3-5 positive/grateful things for every negative/critical thing you say.

Love October: Per Ed Mylett’s Power of One More concept.

Give your sweetie a hug, and then one more!

If you normally give them a greeting kiss, give them one more! Spend a minute hugging, then one more! etc.

Give them a compliment, and then one more!

Go on a weekly date night, and then a little extra time!

Nature October:

Leave the windows open at night!

Enjoy fall candles

Air duvets on balcony overnight

Eat outside as much as possible

Weekends October:

Pumpkin patch trip

Bonfire

Feed the homeless

Make cards for kids in the hospital

Actually go to church events (ie for me cookouts at least once)

Actually take a sabbath (i’d like to do zero chores! Cook/clean ahead). Give yourself the gift of a day completely off!

Make apple pies

Spending $$Sober October: 💵 🍁

NO AMAZON PURCHASES unless absolutely critical

Grocery budget: no fancy vegan foods like vegan cheese, burgers, brats, etc. You can do without that for just a month!

Grocery budget continued: Consider picking fresh wild flowers when possible instead of buying flowers! Or 5$ pretty carnations!

Create a financial goal: ie, house, car, laptop, iPad, 10k savings. Something not too big so it is still attainable. Mine: 10k in savings by January; $$ so I can get Thermage at dermatology!

October Fallcore Hard-Core mornings: Level up from the 5am club!

Get up an hour earlier than usual by the end of October: Wake up 15 minutes earlier each week. (Ie: week 1. 4:45a. Week2, 430a, etc.)

Morning ice bath (or cold plunge outside)

More time reading Bible/praying

Selfcare October:

Weekly clay face mask

Weekly steam/ice facial

(Daily skincare routine should go without saying! It does for me. Cleanser, Vit C + SPF am, retinol + moisturizer pm. If you’re not already doing this, you need to fix your life!)

Weekly epsom salt bath

Daily green juice

Weekly intensive journaling (for me: jordan peterson’s selfauthoring suite)

Fitness October:

30 days of Yoga (YT Yoga w Adriene)

Zone 2 cardio > 3x/week (for me - running, swimming)

Stretching afterwards, side splits (TLB on YT)

Pull-ups on Tuesday and Thursday

Weekend warrior: extra long run or swim

Inspire October:

Meditate daily > 15 minutes

Spend time riding your bike > 1x/month

Get rollerblades again! Skate > 1x/week

Let your mind wander for a few minutes daily!

Watch inspiring YT videos (for me, that’s Robin Sharma etc).

Read for pleasure/inspiration > 1x/week!

Grind October:

Get to work/school 30-60 minutes earlier than you usually do

Have at least one day per week where you work insane hours in person (ie big experiment, long project)

Lay out your work outfit the night before so mornings are a little easier.

Professional Goals October:

Have at least one major needle-moving goal accomplished this month in your school/work.

For me it’s:

Submit manuscript

Complete dissertation

Apply to defend dissertation

Defend dissertation

Complete scoping review

Complete meta data analysis

[beringandwells13]

13 Hours of Bering and Wells Zoom Meetup!

Here's a more concrete timetable; sorry it took me so long!

If you haven't signed up yet, here's the form where you can do that; it asks your email address and I will only send the Zoom link out to that email address, so that we don't get brigaded.

We're starting at 11am CEST/5am EST/5pm MYT. I'll host for the first hour or so, and after that I'll leave the Zoom open but will have to step away so that my brain can wind down again.

In that first hour, we'll have some introductions (names/nicknames/fandom names, how did we get into W13/Bering and Wells, are we fandom creators in some way, what does Bering and Wells mean for us etc.). Then we can have a trivia quiz that I've prepared! I'm also working on a headcanon bingo; not sure if I'll get it done in time though!

After that, once I step away, I can queue up the Bering and Wells episodes, and leave the Zoom open so that anyone who still wants to can talk and hang out.

If you wanna be a host/moderator/someone who steers the conversation for a while during that time (between noon CEST and 7pm CEST), please contact me so that we can organize something!

I'll hop back on at 7pm CEST and we'll have another round of intros with whoever's there then, and maybe a reprise of the trivia quiz and headcanon bingo too!

At 8pm CEST/2pm EST/2am MYT, we'll have a writer's panel with @kla1991, @magicmumu2 and me. These are the questions we'll cover:

what's your fic writing process? (and if you're a published author too, does it differ between fic and originals?)

how do you make sure you keep your characters in character?

where do you find your inspiration for fic?

what, to you, is the pull of writing fic (for Bering and Wells/in general)?

what's the fic you're most proud of and why?

Plus any questions you wanna ask!

That'll probably take an hour; after that, I'll probably have to bow out again at some point, but will still leave the Zoom open. I have two offers from people who are both in EST to host at that time, so you'll have someone to steer the conversation, maybe have the quiz/bingo a third time for any newcomers, etc.

The 13 hours will be complete at midnight CEST/6pm EST/6am MYT.

[mikajihiko]

So Ive decided to splash tumblr with my hobby of updating everyone about fandom events~! If you missed anything fandom wise, this blog will catch you right up to speed! November - December 2022

1.) Given Square Calendar

     Kizu-sensei is once again releasing a personalized calendar for 2023! She shared about releasing a calendar last October after sharing a colored art version of an older art. Saying she desires to make a calendar again for the following year. She also shares of a new art for Ritsuka by tweeting out a speed up video of her digitally painting, which you can check out here!

     On the 1st week of December, Japanese shops such as Fromangee and Comicomi have tweeted about the calendar opening for pre-orders. Hilariously, this has seemingly caught Kizu-sensei off guard, stating she hasnt even started drafting the calendar yet! Ending with her replying to her own tweet with links to different stores that are open to reservations 😭 I’ll leave comprehending those emoji’s to yall sdncbas

     According to ComiComi, distribution of the calendar will start on the 31st of December (Arrival dates will vary). Check it out at their store, here!

2.) Given Nendoroids

     After years of begging Good Smile they have finally heard our wishes! On the 26th of November, Orange Rouge has released the prototype for Ritsuka and Mafuyu nendoroids! More information is to follow, but people suspect them to release close to the end of next year. Check them out at GoodSmile’s ‘Autumn Collection 2022′ gallery by clicking here!

3.) Given Movie English dub      After a well received English dubbing of Given season 1, featured on Crunchyroll back in August, the team had opted to release a physical version of not only the 1st season but of the movie as well; featuring the same cast as the 1st season dub. On the 15th of November, distribution of the dvd’s started; And just recently, people have been receiving their packages; with once again only having good things to say! 

     As of current, the movie is not available on Crunchyroll but is available for purchase on Apple TV - $14.99, or rent for $3.99. Physical copies of the dvd is still available for purchase at Crunchyroll store which you can check out by clicking here!

4.) Given GORORIN      The Gororin’s are back! After the distribution of these cuties on November 26, Medicos have decided to put them up for sale at their physical store at Shinjuku~ Available for purchase as a set of 6 and/or a single character via blind pull (you wont know which one you’ll get!). They’re available as long as stocks last! If you want to get your hands on these plushies but is far from Shinjuku, try checking your local proxy or Mercari website! For more details, check out Medicos website by clicking here!

5.) Given Anime on air!      Given is broadcasted once again! Airing on the following dates in December at ABEMA anime LIVE 2 channel, following another great anime by Noitamina. All episodes of Given will be broadcasted starting on +9GMT Sunday at midnight, Monday at 1am till 5am, and on Tuesday 5pm till 10pm. All episodes will be available to watch on December 11 from midnight till 11:59am. Click here to access the link to the broadcast. Links are only available during the aforementioned time slots!

6.) Chapter Update: Hiragi Mix_20      The 3rd chapter of Volume 9 has released leaving everyone utterly emotional! People have been on their toes ever since the release of Dear+’s chapter preview, leaving everyone wondering if this chapter would finally be the resolution we’ve all been waiting for

     Kizu-sensei shares of receiving her copy of the latest Cheri+ magazine, as well as a copy of her portion of the series! Highlighting the upper right text which roughly translates to “The sound that he and you gave me is running around inside my body"

     She also reminisces her feelings regarding the day she submitted this chapter. Saying how it’s one of the longer chapters, as well as hinting of how tired she has been

     This wouldn't be the first time sensei has shared her struggles before releasing an upcoming chapter, with the latest one about how she has drawn 6 fingers instead of 5 in one unspecified panel

     With that being said, The next chapter update will be on March instead of January- A well deserved rest for sensei to fully enjoy the holidays after much hard work! She isn't leaving us hanging however, as Given vol 7 english translation releases on the 10th of January. Dont forget to get your copies and give chapters 6-7 a good binge (re)read~!      For those interested in reading or getting their copies of Cheri+ magazine (the official magazine serialization for Given chapter updates, and more BL series!), check out CDJapan here while stocks are available! Or wait for the digital copy of the magazine to be available in roughly a month from the physical magazine release

✨ Whats Kizu Up To? Here’s some silly Kizu-sensei thing(s) that happened that I have no idea where to put so I’ve made a short segment right here kjsdasd--      Sensei was doodling during a meeting again 😭 sdcasdc this time on a screen that was shared with a person who was in charge (manager-san?)

   And, thats it for Nov-Dec AAAA!! Share your thoughts, wishes, reactions, and tell me if I’ve missed something~ Also tell me if I should continue doing these hehehe, I always do this on twitter but in a more sporadic way~ Tumblr’s long but also fun! Happy Holidays everyone!

[thatndginger]

Actually @writeintrees I am not quite done with talking about the Shapeshifter Coffeeshop AU, because I can't just leave anything alone lol

Side note: the coffeeshop au world is just our world. No magic or shapeshifters or anything, just cute vibes

The shop is called Salty Dog Cafe. It started out as a joke because Carlisle was a sailor on cargo ships in his twenties, but everyone loves the name. It's near one of the city's piers, yet another reason to embrace the name. The staff refer to themselves collectively as the 'dog pack', and it's a tradition to write what kind of dog you think you'd be on your nametag - or other animal, if a dog doesn't quite fit.

The logo is a scottish deerhound wearing one of those sou'wester hats and sporting an exaggerated beard and a smoking pipe. Warrick likes to hide the logo somewhere in window murals. Currently, the Instagram-follower favorite is one he did of the hound - wearing the hat and a yellow rainslicker - standing in a little boat and facing down a kraken. Occasionally Warrick'll swap the deerhound for another type of dog (one that a staff member has claimed) to see who notices.

The Salty Dog opens at 6am and stays open until 10 at night, which is how they have such a diverse array of regulars and the whole morning/evening shift thing. Whoever is the designated baker for the day usually gets in at about 5am to start in on the morning's goodies. Kerr' schedule usually means he's working the morning baker shift the first half of the week, then flips to evenings for the second half. No one knows how he manages this but he actually get annoyed if you try and put him on all mornings.

When the second location opens, Reese calls it the Salty Cat Cafe, and has Warrick make a second logo that depicts a grizzled persian cat in sou'wester hat and pipe. A friendly 'rivalry' between the dogs and cats is born shortly after - no one takes it too seriously though, it's all for fun and publicity. The baked goods at the Salty Cat are a lot 'tamer' than the Dog, owing to the fact that Kerr mainly works at the Dog and his protege Aleksei isn't nearly as good at coming up with gross-sounding-but-tasty recipes. Yet.

Warrick and Kerr do manage to convince Carlisle to get a liquor license for the Salty Dog (it doesn't take much convincing, honestly) and create an entire menu for it over the course of a few very long, very tipsy weeks. The drinks aren't actually that boozy, just enough to get the flavor and kick from the alcohol. Jay and Portia refuse to sell more than two to a single customer, insisting that they're baristas not bartenders. The cafe only sell this 'hard coffee' option after 5pm, and usually only on nights when there's live music in house. It's more of a novelty thing, honestly, but it draws business all the same.

As for the regulars...

While everyone is convinced that Adrien Montrose is part of the mafia, he's not. The Montrose family are business tycoons, and they may have some cutthroat business tactics, but they're not criminals. Adrien starts coming to the Salty Dog because he's the manager of one of the family's businesses nearby, and one of his staff recommended the cafe. He keeps coming because the coffee is actually really good, and he secretly enjoys the way Kerr 'haggles' him into buying some of the baked goods in the mornings.

(They started dating when Adrien came in one evening on a live music night and Kerr used the opportunity of a full house to corner Adrien and ask him if he was actually part of the mafia or not. Adrien used that as an opportunity to take Kerr on a date disguised as a 'come to this address and find out' challenge. They just ended up hooking up in Adrien's office. The animals.)

No one is aware that Adrien is a Montrose at first, and they definitely don't know that he and Lucas are related. Lucas only appears occasionally, almost always when he's made it his goal to make Adrien's day difficult. He's set to inherit the CEO title for the Montrose Group, and likes to make sure his youngest brother knows his place as a simple manager.

Along that line, while most of the Salty Cat staff are pretty sure Luka Kovac is a mafia enforcer or something, he's actually a giant nerd working at the local planetarium. He just looks scary as hell. He likes the cafe because it's quiet and has a cozy atmosphere, and someone on the staff keeps stocking the 'take one, leave one' bookcase with vintage sci-fi. He starts leaving his own sci-fi books in exchange, and slowly everyone catches on to the fact that he's just a giant, soft dork.

Calypso de la Fuente is a nightclub owner, which is why she only ever shows up in the hour or so before the Salty Dog closes. She'll only come in when she's had to be awake during the day for something, which happens every couple of weeks. Whoever is stuck making her horrifying twelve-shot, amaretto-drizzled monstrosity usually also has to navigate her trying-to-be-nice-but-too-tired-for-niceties conversation. Then she'll down half the drink on her way out the door and head to her club until the wee hours of the morning. She and Jay have definitely flirted with each other, but Calypso already has a girlfriend and Jay just likes flirting with terrifying women.

[captawesomesauce]

Thoughts at 7am...

I don't think anyone who lives outside of LA quite understands what it means to be "trapped" in various parts of LA.

When it takes 2 hrs to drive 7 miles - When a half mile trip to the grocery store takes 30 mins - When going ANYWHERE to do ANYTHING is an exhausting fight against time and distance...

You basically end up trapped where you are.

If you live in the SFV, you rarely leave the SFV. The thought of having to go through hollywood, downtown LA or the sepulveda pass is UGH! Not only do you have to fight the traffic on the way out, but you have to deal with the return traffic to!

And it's exhausting. It's exhausting to deal with LA's gridlock where you are constantly at either a standstill or damn close to it all day and all night. Other places have rush hour, LA will trap you at 2am just as much as 5pm.

So anywhere you go becomes a THING.... a whole production because you can't just go somewhere. You can't just get in your car and go willy nilly. Nope Nope nope.

You have to plan to avoid the WORST times... leave at 10am or 5am, return at 11pm .. maybe 2am? God help you if you leave at 8am and have to head back at 6pm!

Heading to the beach? Figure it'll take you about an hour or two to get there, even if you're just 12 miles away. So say its a good day - you drive an hour... you get there... find parking somehow... and ... now what? You know that you just spent an hour getting there and it'll take another hour to head back.... so you have to make the most of it... you can't just go and spend an hour at the beach for a 2 hr commute!!!!

Do you know how frustrating it is to spend 2 or 3 hours driving for something that only takes 10 mins to accomplish??? Drop off this, pick up that, grab something else.... it's quick, it's no big deal.. but you spent all that time stuck in traffic!

Thats why it's so nice to out of the valley, away from downtown, and closer to the places we want to go and want to be. It's a mental SHOCK ... don't get me wrong... but so nice.

W is still trying to adjust a bit. When we were looking at places, and I was plotting them out on a map, she couldn't comprehend it spatially/mentally. Things looked so spread out, she was sure it'd be impossible to go from A to B without it taking forever and being difficult. But having grown up near here, I knew that we could be at one end of the area to the other easily in less than 20 mins.

Also things are grouped near each other in ways that make sense. In the Valley, but if you need to shop for furniture or get parts for your computer or see a doctor.... man, it's gonna be an hour drive away and nothing is close to anything else! Here, we went to get a bed and there were 5 mattress and furniture stores all near each other!!! There are 2 markets across the street. The sams club and the walmart are in the same shopping center!

Things aren't all day productions. If you want to go to the beach, you don't have to leave at 5am and stay all day. We can go whenever it strikes us..... like at 3pm and just go walk around a bit.

W is so used to being a passenger princess. We go somewhere, and she curls up and sleeps while I drive. Wherever we go, she has that time to decompress and nap and recover. She needs it. When we get home, she needs that shutdown mode so she has energy to help carry stuff and put it away when we get back.

But that doesn't quite work out anymore.

Yesterday's trip back from the beach/pier meant that just as she got comfy and settled into her seat and started to drift off... we were home. She was like.. wait... what the hell... already?????

Our goal this weekend is to go to the farmers market..... it's just down the street and should be fun :)

[vampirelocks]

day in the life

wake up at around 5am

get ready for school

-skincare and gua sha

-get dressed

PERFUME PERFUME PERFUME

-skin tint and brow gel

-hairstyle (half up or down or all down)

-make myself some coffee

or go to starbucks twice a week.(only)

- check my socials as I drink my coffee

try to listen to some calming music

7am: leave the house

then classes from 7:30 to 9:00

snack break: READ READ READ

then more classes

(pls focus and write notes)

then 12pm is lunch break

which means work work work

then 1 more class

& done @ 1:30pm

go to the gym @2pm sharp

1st we run (2 miles)

quick ab,arm,leg workout.

(Alexis Ren & Daisy Keech )

then sauna

then we cleanse the body

then we moisturize.

study @ 4pm

study

study

finish @ 5pm

then we meditate ladies and gentleman

finish @ 5:30pm

[r-ene]

Daily Routine as an Overloaded 3rd year BS Respiratory Therapy Student (2nd Semester)

**saw this in my drafts from last year haha, kind of miss this schedule

Overload = taking up more units than prescribed by the curriculum or uni. My uni only allows up to 30 units per semester but I took 31-33 (10-11 subjects)

We'll do this in the setting of my 2nd sem for days as it's purely face to face and following 730 to 130 classes as its more consistent, for classes starting at a later time, this schedule is adjusted :)

3:30AM to 4AM wake up time

4AM to 5AM shower, make up time, prep lunch if classes end later than 1PM, double check things to bring + if gas range closed

5AM ideal time to leave, latest at 6AM

5AM to 6:10AM commute time

6:10AM to 6:20AM quiet time - I like to read the bible before anything else and bask in the early morning at Dunkin'

6:20AM to 7:15AM breakfast (black iced coffee + tuna bunwich) + review, advance study, make notes from previous classes

7:15AM to 7:20AM walk to lecture room

7:30 to 12:30AM class 1 (it's usually neonatal and pediatric respiratory care that starts at 7:30 on the dot, we have breaks every now and then and sometimes dismissed early)

3:00PM ideal time to leave uni and go home. I didn't have classes that's scheduled beyond 3PM and our afternoon profs doesn't extend classes to after 3:00PM

4PM or 5PM I arrive at home and most times I like to walk Luna before washing up, especially when I'm in scrubs because the white uniform's fabric is... hot

Ideally I study only until 11:30PM so sometimes I eat an early dinner so I would have more time to study. Saturday's allotted for completion of requirements for minor subjects so I have lots of time for my majors during the weekdays and I keep Sunday a family day – no academics :)

i was very satisfied with how my grades turned out with this kind of routine although i could've probably done better at some points, hahaha

[taylorgraymoore]

December 5, 2023

Below is one more day from my online diary thingy, which I'm posting more regularly on my website (www.taylorgraymoore.com). If you like it, please take a look :D

I'm going to take a break from chronicling Montreal for now and try to catch up to the present, which is getting forgotten. And that forgets the whole point of the project. I need to wait to talk to someone about the next bit, anyway, and have time to chew on it. So, a break.

Anyway, here you go:

Today has been an eventful day, easily the most eventful of the trip so far: it’s nearly 4AM on the 6th now, and the day hasn’t ended. I just got back. I am well and drunk, and it’s far too late to write about any of this. Let me try again tomorrow, or later. Perhaps on the plane. I don’t know when the next time will be: this end of the trip is so compressed, and there is so much happening that these last days, as I look back at them (I’m back in Vancouver now, I couldn’t even finish this on the plane), and it feels like it should have been most of the trip. It was not—it was only the last 50 some-odd hours of a week long visit.

…

Almost everything after this point, this day and the next one at least, I finished after the fact. It got that busy. … So, the texture of the narrative will therefore be somewhat different—I don’t know how, but if I’m writing most of it in Vancouver who knows how long later, that will probably happen. It’s a memoir now, not a diary. Although I’ll still try to pretend—

Today is the day I promised to visit Tom in Lachine. Lachine is far—still technically Montreal proper, although this is only recently the case, but so far west it’s almost the airport, and, apart from passing through making my way to a plane, I have never been there. So I had to look up how to get there, and what time I had to leave if I wanted to get there, hang out a bit, and then get back out with reasonable time left in the evening. I have plans to get out to Verdun in the evening, you see—there’s somebody I want to see.

.I check this. I’ve checked it before, but I want to check again to be sure, and be more exact about it. Seems I’ll have to leave the apartment by 10:45—the earliest I’ve left to go anywhere so far—walk to the metro, get off at Lionel-Groulx and change to a bus. Not so complicated. But it’s a long trip, about an hour, and I always dislike unknown transfers, especially when the bus only comes every half an hour.

(It’s Friday, December 15th right now—the fourth day of waking up at 5am, and I’ve been editing this stuff at about 5pm every day this week, after coming home from the early shift I’ve been waking up at 5 for and settling in. It’s starting to get hard to do this, just from accumulated fatigue. And the texture of these texts is starting to turn into something more uncertain, less spontaneous. I’m less sure if I like it any more; I’m not sure if it’s still—and I HATE using this word but it’s the only one I know that gets the idea across—authentic to what it was meant to be. It’s starting to feel too much like fiction. I’m starting to worry too much about the plot, about scenes, about what I want to convey, and I’m going back and editing too much. I’m going to try to quit that a bit.)

I hadn’t seen Tom in… when was the last time I saw Tom? I don’t even remember. We weren’t so close, but I liked him. I was not always nice enough to him. It would be good to see him again. I had promised to see him before I knew he lived way out in Lachine, but that was fine—I like a good, long journey into the unknown. Fleshing out the map of the city a little. I’m a wanderer at heart, at least when I can do it by bus.

He offered to sell me back the copy of Animal Crossing that I sold him back in 2018, during the worst days at the end when I was selling everything off, mostly old games that I had never wanted to get rid of and wish I still had. (Oh, hey, that must’ve been the last time I’d seen him. Standing across from the old bathhouse at Bagg and St-Laurent waiting to meet him and exchange the game for, what was it, about thirty bucks? It was outside where, in the wee hours of the next morning, I would find that Matvey was saying. The world goes in these circles and places find their meaning that way). I said sure. I would be pleased to get it back—I’d give it to my mom, who had played it more than me. I wasn’t happy to sell a single one of those, and the idea of getting one of them, any of them, back is intensely cathartic. Like the quiet sort of emotional resolution you get at the end of a lot of quiet postmodern novels—a little bit of Earthly perfection.

I want to finish editing the last chapter of the novella before I go, and I do that easily—it’s only a couple of pages long, and I don’t have so many notes to copy out. Want to do that so much because I strongly suspect I will have no more time after I heard out the door that morning.

I have another time after I’m done to finish my coffee and get a 20 from the ATM in the dep directly below me, and then I’m off towards Mont-Royal metro through the snow that I’m already used to again. Enough has fallen and been packed now that I don’t slip so easily anymore. Make a quick phone call to home as I go up Rachel, then I turn onto St-Denis, thinking about how I had always wanted to spend more time on the street and how nice it feels to be walking along it now, and then I slip onto the metro and begin the journey proper. I zip underneath downtown and then out the other side.

Lionel-Groulx is a place I’ve never gone to much except to pass through. It’s where the bus from the airport lets you off, and where you catch it if you’re going out again. Sometimes I also got off here to go to the Super C by the Atwater Market, but that’s about it. I know there’s stuff around here, just the pattern of my life. I think I did go to a cafe near here once, just to have done it. But I associate it with comings and goings.

When I first arrived back after five years in exile, last May, I got out here. It has a power to it if only for that.

It’s one of my favourite stations design wise—looks pretty nice, I like the strange twisted tree sculpture with the faces, and it’s highly functional: an exchange station, the obvious transfers are made by just crossing the platform. Refreshing compared to all the walking in Berri-UQAM and not to mention the twisted labyrinth inside Jean-Talon. (I don’t know Snowdon enough to have an opinion.) Matt raves about it on his website: it’s truly excellent. … Let’s not talk too much about who its named after, other than to say he’s got a nice name.

There’s a bit of confusion when I surface from it, because the bus stop I need had been moved for… some reason that was not clarified. I cross Atwater towards a stop I at first think is what I want, only to find another closed stop. I turn around and see the bus appearing and about to turn towards what I realize is definitely the place I’m supposed to be. But the light changes, I bolt back across Atwater, and I join the line with plenty of time. I board. I sit. The bus pulls away and I water the world go by out the window as we follow the same path as that fabled bus to the airport until pulling out to go to Lachine.

Like I said, have never really been to Lachine. The airport bus passes along the top of it, although on the expressway so you don’t really see it, and I did get a better view on Uber ride once, which went along the streets of Lachine while trying to get me through the airport in time to catch a flight while the expressway was backed up with traffic.

The bus followed the same route as that Uber had for a short while, then turned onto Provost. I enjoy seeing previously unknown streets: it looks like how a lot of Montreal looks, but there are more single-floor detached homes. It’s a little like the South Shore, but not nearly that suburban. I watched a TV show filmed here once, and it looks enough like the East End for you to not notice it isn’t. But it is certainly more out of the way than where I’ve spent most of my time.

I get off at the stop Maps told me to get off at, and begin the trek through the snow to my end destination—one long Montreal block away. I pass a stop for the 90 St-Jacques, which is closer to where I’m going and also goes back to the metro. Maybe a better way to leave—and it goes through NDG, where there’s a bookstore I want to visit. Let’s look into that.

The address I’m headed for is the first building around the corner, when I turn. I walk up the steps and ring the apartment number I’d been given, get buzzed in.

Tom is as I remember him, more or less. Which isn’t a bad thing. We do the exchange for the game, he gets his twenty and the Animal Crossing goes into my bag, and then we sit and play some steam games. for an hour or two. It’s the most relaxed I’ve been in days. I do better than I thought I would, and I wish I did stuff like this more often. I note to myself I should see how many of these I can find on the Switch when I’m back in Van.

But then it’s time to go—we promise to add each other on switch, and I leave to catch that 90 St-Jacques bus. Which runs every fifteen minutes, not every half hour like the other one, apart from just plain being closer, and Tom agrees it’s the better way to go. I leave the building, turn the corner. The buss appears, passes me, pulls up to the stop. I break into a run, dunking under one or two tree branches without slowing down and praying I don’t slip. It sits there. I make it. I sit down to catch my breath—my lungs are still not exactly super happy, so I’m suffering a little—and see the useful digital sign telling me that I had five more minutes and so didn’t need to run.

It’s a more interesting bus route: the same way back along Provost, and then down 1re and Georges-V the way I came, but then instead of joining the Autoroute it instead goes under it and takes me through more that I’d never seen—through Ville St-Pierre and the bottom of Montreal West, along St-Jacques until I recognize Cavendish and here we are in familiar lands again. NDG: I spent a lot of time here, I was in a relationship with someone who lived here for years, and then I even lived here for a week at the very end of things. Even after I had come back to Montreal, it seemed like another thing entirely to go back to NDG, and I didn’t honestly expect to do it. But here I am—for the bookstore.

At Upper Lachine and Melrose I get off the bus. I walk up Melrose, through the tunnel under the tracks, and then continue until I eventually reach Sherbrooke West—which is exactly as I remember it. Why does it seem impossible that it still exists preserved? It should have collapsed like a false vacuum after I last passed by here on the 105. Like a fantasy world one wakes up from, like Koholint Island, gone.

But that’s silly; and nothing has changed. My favourite cafe there closed down during lockdown, but even that is the same on the outside—the sign is still up and everything, just the windows are papered over. I know this because I pass it on the bus when I leave, later, and I’m shocked to see that even that is the same. It must have been held suspended for me, so I could see it again and leave it properly, without fear and without distortion.

The reason why I’m here at all: Encore Books & Records. The third and last bookstore I’m going to to find the Okri book. … have they have it! I hadn’t even planned to come here. Must be fate. They have it, plus a couple of other books I want—Achebe’s No Longer at Ease, which I read shortly thereafter, and then I forget the other one—and a couple of records—Ville Emard Blues Band, plus a Christmas gift for someone—and I make myself glad that I brought a reusable tote back. I prolong my visit a bit longer, because I really did not expect to ever be back here. I take some pictures and send them to Mark, who would love it. Then—I really don’t want to be too late getting back—I head onwards. Walk out to the stop for the 105, wait a good ten minutes for it. Take the trip I remember so well back towards Vendome and the outside world, passing the shuttered Shaika and a past life as I go.

A version of myself died here in 2018. For years after, it really was hard to believe that my life had not somehow ended, that the life I was living in my present was in any way still my own. This bus ride reattaches that death to my continuing life. I don’t think that, then; that’s the artistry brought on by a later week’s reflection; when I disembark outside the totally reconstructed and unrecognizable Vendome, I’m only thinking of how hungry I am.

Back in the Plateau, I get off at Sherbrooke rather than Mont-Royal, so that, on the way back, I can stop off at Le Vieux Europe and get one of their sandwiches. It was on my list of places that I’d always wanted to go to but never did. I also like the walk better: I’m sick of the walk from Mont-Royal, and I want to see Carré St-Louis and the lower bits of the Plateau, I am happy to get to walk along des Pins E and along Roy, go past a not-yet-open Else’s and remember the good and the bad times had in there (mostly good; I only haven’t been there yet because I have decided to wait for Matvey, because it was his place more than mine…)

[davidalmeida]

Preparation for Parenthood

(From January 1999, saved from a hilarious multi-forwarded email that was ‘making the rounds.’)

Preparation for parenthood is not just a matter of reading books and decorating the nursery.  Here are 12 simple tests for expectant parents to take to prepare themselves for the real life experience of being a mother or father.

1) (Women) To prepare for maternity, put on a dressing gown and stick a beanbag chair down the front.  Leave it there for nine months. After nine months, remove 10% of the beans.

2) (Men) To prepare for paternity, go to the local drug store, tip the contents of your wallet on the counter, and tell the pharmacist to help himself.  Then go to the supermarket.  Arrange to have your salary paid directly to their head office.  Go home.  Pick up the paper and read it for the last time.

3) Before you finally go ahead and have children, find a couple who are already parents and berate them about their methods of discipline, lack of patience, apallingly low tolerance levels, and how they have allowed their children to run riot.  Suggest ways in which they might improve their child's sleeping habits, toilet training, table manners, and overall behavior.  Enjoy it--it's the last time in your life that you will have all of the answers.

4) To discover how the nights feel, walk around the living room from 5pm till 10pm carrying a wet bag weighing approximately 8-12 pounds. At 10pm put the bag down, set the alarm for midnight, and go to sleep. Get up at 12am and walk around the living room again with the bag, until 1am. Put the alarm on for 3am.  As you can't go back to sleep, get up at 2am and make a drink. Go to bed at 2:45am. Get up again at 3am when the alarm goes off.  Sing songs in the dark till 4am.  Put the alarm on for 5am. Get up. Make breakfast. Keep this up for 5 years.  Look cheerful.

5) Can you stand the mess children make?  To find out, smear peanut butter onto the sofa and jam onto the curtains.  Hide a fish stick behind the stereo and leave it there all summer.  Stick your fingers in the flower beds then rub them on the clean walls.  Cover the stains with crayons.  There, how does that look?

6) Dressing small children is not as easy as it seems.  First buy an octopus and a string bag.  Attempt to put the octopus into the string bag so that none of the arms hang out.  Time allowed for this: all morning.

7) Take an egg carton.  Using a pair of scissors and a can of paint, turn it into an alligator.  Now take a toilet paper tube. Using only scotch tape and a piece of foil, turn it into a Christmas tree. Last, take a milk container, a ping pong ball, and an empty packet of Coco Puffs and make an exact replica of the Eiffel Tower. Congratulations, you have just qualified for a place on the play group committee.

8) Forget the Miata and buy the minivan.  And don't think you can leave it out in the driveway spotless and shining.  Family cars don't look like that. Buy a chocolate ice cream bar and put it in the glove compartment.  Leave it there. Get a quarter. Stick it in the cassette player. Take a family-size bag of chocolate cookies. Mash them down the back seats. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car. There! Perfect!

9) Get ready to go out. Wait outside the toilet for half an hour. Go out the front door. Come in again. Go out. Come back in. Go out again. Walk down the front path. Walk back up it again. Walk down it again. Walk very slowly down the road for 5 minutes. Stop to inspect minutely every cigarette butt, piece of used chewing gum, dirty tissue, and dead insect along the way. Retrace your steps. Scream that you've had as much as you can stand until all of the neighbors come out and stare at you. Give up and go back in the house. You are now just about ready to try taking a small child for a walk.

10) Always repeat everything you say at least five times. Go to your local supermarket. Take with you the nearest thing you can find to a pre-school child. A fully grown goat is excellent. If you intend to have more than one child, take more than one goat. Buy your week's groceries without letting the goats out of your sight. Pay for everything the goats eat or destroy. Until you can easily accomplish this, do not even contemplate having children.

11) Hollow out a melon. Make a small hole in the side. Suspend it from the ceiling and swing it from side to side. Now get a bowl of soggy Froot Loops and attempt to spoon it into the swaying melon by pretending to be an airplane. Continue until half of the Froot Loops are gone. Tip the rest into your lap, making sure that a lot them fall on the floor. You are now ready to feed a 12-month-old child.

12) Learn the names of every character from Barney, Sesame Street, and Power Rangers.  When you find yourself singing, "I love you, you love me" at work, now you finally qualify as a parent!

[heonie-ween]

.

[hobisstar]

Dance For Us | Yandere OT7! X Female Dance Instructor! Reader. Short but Sweet.

Summary: Being the dance instructor for the biggest group of the 21st century seems to be a dream come true! Y/N has been BTS’s choreographer since they debuted, They all have become the best of friends since then. Of course with love there comes the random urges to to protect… right?

Warning: Stalking, controlling, overprotective, soft Yandere theme, Drugging as in putting laxative in a drink to make the tummy upset.

A/N: ahh!! I’m on a role if you ask me personally. I’ve been releasing so much for you all and this is just out of the random thoughts. Please do not STEAL. ILL KNOW. This will be my last Yandere for awhile, eh it kinda starts take a toll on ya a little. Enjoy!

“I can’t fucking get this!” The back up dancer shouted out of stress. “Please come show me again.” He cried out. Y/N chuckled and went over and helped him.

Ah, the joy of being a constructor. Y/N, Namjoon, Hobi, Jin, Yoongi, Jimin, Taehyung, Jungkook, and the back up dancers have been practicing since 5am. It was currently 5pm, oh boy were they all so tired. The boys were having a comeback soon, Persona 7. They need dances for Black Swan and ON and of course Y/N was the first one that they thought of when it came to figuring out a choreography. Jungkook basically shouted her name when he heard they need choreo. “Y/N! She will be perfect, i mean she is perfect, her dancing is just as wonderful as ours. We should be thanking her for even making us the best dancers.” He stated happily talking about her, which made the rest of the members laugh and smile. Gosh, they all loved her so much. It was starting to get out of hand though. When they all first met when they were younger , of course it was okay to invite her to places with them and text her and add her on social medias and all that other first step friendship shit. But, it got to the point where they started stalking her. Yoongi was in charge of location. He had a tracking device on her phone, even when she got a new one he some how managed to but it to where they can forever see her location. Namjoon was in charge in keeping her safe, well, he was in charge of basically watching her when she went out on her own. Yoongi had the location so he could just send it to him and he’d be on his way on his bike cautiously watching her from afar. Jin was in charge of buying her groceries. She was as busy as them though they preferred that she only made dances for them, it didn’t work like that. Y/N being so busy she would forget to but food for her home and even eat sometimes. He made sure their was food for her no matter where she was or what the situation was. Hoseok was in charge of cleaning her home. This is something he offered to do since he wanted something to do outside of his public life. That’s it. Lastly, the maknae line was in charge in spoiling her with gifts, love, clothes, sometimes even fancy lingerie. They all played a part in her life. That’s how they made it and that’s how they will keep it.

“Okay guys! That’s it for today thank you for coming to practice! Go home get the must needed rest and be back here tomorrow the same time!” Y/N spoke into her microphone she bought so everyone could hear her without happening to yell. She smiled and waved seeing everyone pack up and soon leave. She turned to her 6 devils and smiled but she wondered where Jungkook was. As soon as she was about to walk over to them she felt someone lick her up and carry her. “Y/N honey, you know we rather you not move a muscle.” Jungkook stated carrying her over to the rest of the group. She chuckled and nodded not complaining she was tired so not walking was fine to her. Hoseok looks up and smiles once he sees the two walking over to them. “ Ah! It’s our dancing queen! You looks so tired.” He pouted. “ you should get going to get rest” Yoongi stated. “ yeah! You look drained. We don’t like our munchkin being so drained.” Taehyung said shaking his head. “ You havent ate have you?” Jin asked and jumped up to go make her plate of whatever was left of the food that catered them. Namjoon chuckled watching everyone get so worried about her being so tired. Jimin said nothing since he was Examining her tired state. “ you are still so beautiful, even with bags under your eyes, princess.” Jimin stated and smiled.

She blushed at all their questions. then it hit her. She has a friend dinner to go to! Kang Yeosang, a close friend of hers, from the group ATEEZ, who she also choreographed for from time to time, invited her to the groups dinner. Of course she said she didn’t want to be a bother since everytime she was with them she was always the center of attention, kinda like with BTS. Of course Yeosang insisted that she went since the guys and himself haven’t seen her in such a long time. Snapping back to reality she spoke “ Actually, I have somewhere to be guys.” She smiled thinking of her other group of friends. “I’m hanging out with ATEEZ-“

“That group full of guys?!”

“ since when were you all so close?!”

“Reschedule!”

“You promised we’d have a movie night tonight!”

“You need rest!”

“Princess! They dont deserve your time!”

“I’m not letting you go hang out with another group of guys!”

She shook her head and covered her face as they all came at her at once. She sighed. “Namjoon, you all are also a group full of guys. We’ve been close for awhile, Taehyung. I can’t reschedule, Yoongi, I promised I’d go to dinner with them. I know I said that Jin but we can always watch movies after I get back or tomorrow . Hoseok I’ll get rest when I get back. Jimin they need my time just like you all do. And lastly Jungkook, even if I weren’t going anywhere you’d still hold me like I was some little baby.” She jumped out of Jungkook’s arms fighting him a little since he had a grip on her. Y/N went to her bag. “You guys act like you are my only friends. YALL do this all the time, it’s so expected now. I just want to hang out with me just the same about of time I do with yo-“

They all stand up and sigh. “Y/N you know the rules..” oh right, Y/N forgot about those…rules that they set in 2016.

She huffed. “Please just this one time this month..” Basically, they all agreed that since they all were so busy, they could only go out twice a month if it wasn’t work related. She had already went out once to go visit her family. Of course, they knew but she didn’t need to know that. Jin laughed and she looked at him with a confused face. “We know this isn’t your first time going out this month, princess.”

Y/N froze and had to think quickly. “N-No i didnt this would be my first time.”

“Come on Y/N, if this was 2016 you’d barley be able to foul us. But you definitely can’t do that now. You went to go visit that crappy family of yours 2 weeks ago,” Namjoon stated and pulled out his phone showing the location app which showed how many times she left. “H-How do you have my location? Since when have you had it? Why?” She asked in fear. Y/N was about to back up but Jimin grabbed her gently and put her in the middle. “Now now princess~. We have your location for safety reasons. We could never afford you to get hurt by any creep out there. We have to protect you my dear.” Yoongi stated and tapped her head softly as if she was a pet. “This isn’t like you guys..” she mumbled which caused Taehyung to laugh and Hobi to chuckle. “ oh baby you’ve been so blind.” Hobi sat down and pulled her down with him. “We’ve been like this from the jump baby. We knew you are so fragile like a baby. So easily able to believe whatever we say, do, or even feed you.” He calmly admitted.

“What did you do?!” She shouted and that made Jimin giggle. “ oh princess if we were going to harm you we would have done it already dont you think? No, we just drugged the dancers to have a stomachache so they won’t be able to come in tomorrow for practice. So all of us, including you, will be the only ones to come to practice tomorrow. We wanted you to ourselves and we are even surprised it worked out in our favor.” “Plus those ATEEZ guys weren’t going to be there. I told them you canceled because we had to do late practice.” Jungkook stretched and happily smiled at her. “We can have our own dinner!”

“No..” Y/N said and stood up. “ I’m not having dinner with you all. You’ve been stalking me for six years now and you think I’m about to be happy and want to eat with you all? Have you lost your rabbit mind? I can’t believe you all invaded my privacy! And you think that’s cool? Or cute? That’s fucking sick!” She couldn’t take the facts she just got and then them pretending everything was just peachy. How could they? How could they do this and be so calm as if it was a normal everyday thing?

“Are you calling us sick? Well, princess hate break it to you. It’s your fault. You made each and everyone one of us this way. We tried not to get this way and maybe just be like family figures to you, or just simply friends. But that didn’t work one bit. We just had to get closer to you. It’s a wonderful story to tell to someone one day.” Yoongi spoke softly. Even after her calling them weird and sick. They were all calm and yet understanding I mean they knew this would be her reaction. When their little angel was in danger or scared she usually reacted like this. It was a natural reaction. How would you react when you find out your closest best friends were your stalkers? You wouldn’t be so excited.

“You’ll get used to us sooner or later, Y/N. It’s not that hard. You’ll get used to schedule and the constant eye on you.”

“We are just trying to protect you from danger baby…”

While they were trying to reassure her, Y/N was literally going through it. She didn’t not understand what made them like this. Why did they act like that, when did they start acting like that? Fear, was one thing to feel but one thing that unsettled her was… Have they always been watching her? Oh gosh, she feared the worst was to happen or has already happened. Once she snapped out of her day dream, they were all up and ready to practice som more.

“Alright Princess, Dance for us.” Jimin spoke with the most shit eating grin.

[marauder-exe]

Self care- p!Tommyinnit x reader

i wish i was bsfriends w tommy :’)

Word count: 1.3k

Warnings:themes of depression, nothing too deep

A/N: Taking Tommy and Wilbur requests!! u cant tell me tommy doesn’t do the classic british X’s on txts to his friends

It had been a rough stream, 8 hours sat in the same chair putting on the same happy face, it was unbelievably exhausting some days. You took of your headset and set it down after pressing ‘end stream’, you ruffled your hair and took in a deep breath, throwing a glance at the clock on your computer. 5am. You tried to throw caution to the wind, maybe it was an off day? But no, you could feel it, deep inside, another episode. You looked directly into the webcam, your face scrunching up as you take note of your appearance, your ruffled hair, your dark eye bags. It felt like hours, just staring at yourself, your famous thousand-yard stare painted across the screen. Suddenly, your phone vibrated from its place on the desk. You lethargically picked it up as the bright screen illuminated your otherwise dark room. It was Tommy.

Big T: ‘bedwars stream tmrw? : ) x’  

You really didn't feel up to it in all honesty, but you didn’t want to let Tommy down like that, he loves bedwars. A sad smile made its way to your face as you drafted your text back.

Gremlin: ‘only if were on duos together : ) x’

Big T: ‘5pm? X’ You responded with a simple yeee.

You discarded your phone to the side and stood up for the first time in hours. Your bones ached as you outstretched your limbs. Pain. You walked over to your bed and sat on the edge, eyes scouring the room, even though you weren't sure what you were looking for, an escape maybe? It wasn’t even like you had anything to be upset over, great friends, successful streamer, everything was going great, but alas, depression does not give a shit. You crawled into bed, putting your phone on charge and grabbed all of your covers over your head, a long sigh making its way from your lips.

The next day/  

Tommy loaded up minecraft on his computer, reading to slay game at bedwars with you. He got unusually excited when he played minecraft with you, even more excited than normal. There was something about you man, but he just couldn’t figure it out. Youd met in high school, same town and everything, and since then you were like a drug. Not a day had gone by since year 9 that you didn’t talk. He decided to drop you a message as you hadn't texted first. He asked if you were still up for bedwars. Surprisingly though, he didn’t receive a response. He waited. Just 5 minutes he said. And then 10. And then 20. Then 30. He decided to ring you just to check. Plus, he wanted to hear your voice. It rang thrice and nothing. His eyebrows drew together in confusion. You were almost always online. He tried not to overthink, but this is Tommy were talking about. Maybe you were still asleep? He wanted to believe that, but there was an itch, in his brain, that told him not to. Just to make sure, he decided to ask some of your mutual friends on the server. He clicked onto the group discord and noticed Wilbur, philza and Nikki in a vc.  

“Hello Hoes and Homies alike” He bellowed when he joined the vc. Wilbur drew a confused look.

“I thought you were doing duo bed wars with (Y/N) today?” Tommy scoffed.

“Well yah, Wilburrrrr, if you let me get a word out” He joked light heartedly “No seriously though has anyone heard from her since her stream last night” They all looked confused and shook their heads. This made him even more concerned than he was. He quickly thanked them before disconnecting. His mind was running rampant. He quickly decided to throw his shoes on, you didn’t live that far, only a bus ride away on the otherside of town. He grabbed his keys and his jacket and rushed down the stairs.

“Going over to (Y/N)s for a bit” He shouted to Motherinnit as he slammed the door shut.  

-------------

You were straing at the roof in a pit of self loathing when you heard your phone ring. Ugh. It seemed so much work to pick it up. Your hand made its way from under the mountain of covers and snatched your phonr from the side. Tommy. You felt a sting in the back of your eyes and tossed your phone on the bed, turning over and curling up in the covers. You stared at the inside of your covers for minutes on end. Your doorbell sent a sharp chime through the house as your mother went to answer it.

“Hello Tommy, what a surprise" He threw her a quickly greeted her and got straight to the point.

“Is (Y/N) in?”

“Shes upstairs I think, I havent heard from her all day though. Go on up” She stood to the side and let him pass.

You heard the entire conversation through your open window, and let out a heavy sigh, although you were secretly thanking Tommy in uour head for checking up on you. You heard his converse hit the steps as your door was threw open. Tommy immediately regretted his actions, wondering if you were asleep as he took note of the heap of covers on the bed. He let out a quiet whisper.

“(Y/N)?”  

You didn’t really feel like talking, but you let out a quiet ‘yeah’. He rushed over to your side upon hearing your weak response.

“is everything alright? We were meant to be playing bedwars like an hour ago” This prompted you to pull the covers off your head and look at him. He took note of your puffy red eyes, and the dark eye bgs lying underneath. He looked around your room, empty energy drink cand and food containers littered your room. It suddenly clicked to him. You weren't doing okay. He looked back at you deeply, something about that look just caused the floodgates to open. Your eyes were glassy, as Tommy practically melted. He hated seeing you like this. Sure he had the bit of him being a big man with no emotions, but you where his weakness. “Hey, cmon don’t cry” He whispered as he opened his arms, welcoming you into a hug. In an instant you where in his arms, leaving tear stains on his TShirt. He didn’t seem to mind though. After a moment of silence, only broken by your sobs, he piped up. “How about, we forget about the stream for today, and ill go to the corner shop and get us some snacks, and marshmallows and whipped cream, and we can have those killer hot chocolates your mom makes. We can watch a bunch of movies, and ill even let you put one of those stupid facemasks on me, yeah?” This caused a laugh to pierce your sobs, which started to lighten up. You sniffled and pulled back from his hug, a huge smile making its way onto your face, the first genuine smile in a while.

“Thats my girl, that’s what I love to see” He matched your smile. You quickly threw your arms around him and pulled him into a long hug.

“Thank you Tommy” You said sincerely.

“Anything for my favourite girl” He smiled, as he pulled back from the hug. “Maybe while im gone you could try to shower?” He knew how tough some simple things where when you felt like this. You nodded smally and sat up. He leapt from the bed and smiled. “Okay, I wont be long!” And with that, he dashed out of the room.  

You lay back on your bed. You werent okay, but that’s okay, because Tommyinnit is your best friend :)