#I don't mind if someone wants to correct me

[jingledbells]

i feel like a lot of the people who're saying 'stan would treat him better' are not really understanding a lot of his character. i literally saw someone describe him as 'really sweet' and 'a gentleman' and I'm like. no???? first off I just don't think he would be in a romantic relationship during this time period, he's really traumatized and emotionally damaged at this point but he doesn't really. have a lot of space to really think about his situation or reflect because he has to keep up and stand in as ford while he works to get him back and in general its just. a lot yk. another thing is that he's canonically really terrible with romantic relationships in general. there's something in particular about the thing he had with lazy Susan and the sort of. internalized amatonormativity surrounding that, about how he liked the idea of being in a relationship but. didn’t actually want to. but a lot of his canon relationships aren’t really the best/end well. Of course this doesn’t actually have to mean anything in particular but given his past history with relationships I just. don’t think a romantic relationship especially at this point in time would work out. a lot of people think if he had a relationship with fiddleford it would be healthier than fiddauthor and I’m just like….no??? ok first off Stan is kind of a major dick to fiddleford in canon I’m pretty sure he ran him over with his car multiple times on purpose maybe(correct me if I’m wrong I apologize). I think people also forget that at this point in time fiddleford is entering/beginning a stage in his life where he is just at his absolute worst. he’s literally in his evil cultist era and assuming that he’s unaware that Stan is pretending to be ford I don’t think fiddleford would try to reconnect with him at this point. his goal right now is to protect the town from ford via sotbe and he does NOT trust him at all. I think Stan and fiddleford interactions would be fiddleford watching him thinking he was ford and getting into physical fights maybe but just ending with a confused Stan and fiddleford running off like an angry wounded animal. but like. say they were in a relationship at one point, romantic or non romantic, I don’t think it would end well or go well both of them are incredibly mentally unstable and would not be good for each other at all especially fiddleford and I don’t think he would be trusting of Stan at all and would probably end up using the memory gun on him a lot.

and yes ford and fiddlefords relationship was unhealthy and toxic at points and ford defintley treated him unfairly at points but I feel like people forget a lot of it was because of bills manipulation and his succeeding attempts to isolate ford from fidds because keep in mind he loved and respected him and viewed him as an equal and wanted him to be there !! he was so excited to see him and share his adventures with him and just. A lot of it was not his fault, yk??

[hollowed-theory-hall]

Hiii! Do you think Harry stopped growing at 17? If he was as tall as James in DH I would imagine he was taller than his father. I have three brothers and my family is full of male cousins and they all had growth spurts after 17. I could see him growing another couple of inches after the war. His mind and body is finally at peace after 16 years. I always hc him to be 6’0-6’2 at the age of 21.

As far as Harry being scrawny… aren’t most teenage boys? My brothers were into sports and didn’t get into the gym until they were done with high school. With the profession he’s in I would assume fitness would be a requirement for the role. Yeah, you have a wand but what if it breaks or you lose it? He has a huge target on his back having defeated the darkest wizard of all time, and I can’t imagine him not learning how to physically defend himself and his loved ones. I don’t see him a huge buff gym junky, but I do see him as someone who has a lean athletic figure and someone who concentrates more on leg day than arm day. I think going to the gym would be an escape for him and help him decompress. I know the hp world prefer a shorter skinny hero (probably because of Daniel Radcliffe) who looks like an underdog, however every underdog grows up and barely anyone has the same physique as their teenage self.

Honestly, all this differs a lot with genetics. Harry's growth spurts in the books reminds me of my younger brother. Like, my brother was like 5'2 at 15, then, in like, one month near his 16th birthday, he grew to 5'10 and when he was around 19 he grew again by two inches. So, Harry could definitely still grow taller, but we don't really have a way to know.

Like, men can still grow in height until their late 20s, and it's possible James didn't even finish his growth since he died at 21, so he might've grown even taller if he survived to 25. Like, that's possible. I just don't really have evidence for or against besides saying, yes, it's possible, but I wouldn't call it likely since it's highly individual and based on genes. Like, I know guys who stopped growing at 16 and have been stuck at the same height since then. I also know guys who are 25 and still grow taller. It's the magic of genetics.

Muscle mass, physique, and the ability to gain weight are also heavily dependent on genetics and age. Men in their teens and early 20s usually have a much higher metabolic rate, which keeps them lean regardless of how much they eat (again, genetics play a big role here and this isn't true for everyone). Physical activity like Quidditch, would make the already fast metabolism faster. This naturally fast metabolism, combined with certain genetic makeup, can leave you looking lean regardless of how much you go to the gym as well. Some men need to reach their mid-20s before they can actually start gaining the weight necessary to appear buff.

I think Harry would look less lean as he got older. Like, I can hardly imagine a Harry in his mid to late 30s being as lean as 16-year-old Harry. I think his physique will change as he grows, as happens to most people. But I agree with you I don't see him as a super buff gym dude at any point in his life. He's always on the leaner side in my head, but this is all in headcanon territory since it isn't covered by the books.

I would like to add that all the super short and scrawny descriptions of Harry come from the first 4 books when these descriptions are correct. In book 6 Harry is thin, but no one describes him as a scrawny boy with knobbly knees past book 4. Not even he himself. So I definitely see Harry of the final 3 books as more lean than scrawny.

And yeah, you're right about Radcliffe messing up everyone's mental image of Harry, both in looks and personality. It's one of the things that bother me most about the movies. And, everyone can headcanon whatever they want, but I personally don't like short Harry (when he's older, when he's 14, make him short). It's not his canon character and when writers write him short, it's sometimes accompanied by him being written as too passive and meek for my liking because Harry James Potter is not passive or meek. (Radcliffe Harry in the movies is much more passive, hence the skewed mental image I mentioned, but I digress).

Besides, while malnourishment and food intake could affect one's growth, people tend to overlook the 6 years of Hogwarts and Molly's food which would be a huge boost during his puberty years in which he's having most of his growth. Additionally, some people's food intake matters less to their physical development than others — again, I can't stress enough how specific genetic makeup is super important in all this discussion.

TL;DR

Harry might grow taller to be 6' or 6'2. We don't have any evidence for or against really, so it's up to your preference on what you want to headcanon. But it's definitely super possible. If Lily was taller than the average it would even be likley (but I couldn't find any notes on Lily's or Petunia's height). In the books, he is very lean, and it's a combination of a lot of different factors working together: his lifestyle, genetic makeup, and yes, being a teenage boy with the fast metabolism that comes with it. As Harry grows up, he'd probably want to stay fit, but to what degree is also in personal headcanon territory (I personally don't like him becoming an Auror, but that's my preferred headcanon. I still see him staying pretty fit out of paranoia, sort of. I mean, he spent all his teenage years with a Damocles sword over his head. He literally died. I think he's allowed to be a little hypervigilant after that. I mean, he already is, but you get the point).

[femsolid]

Can I ask how does separatism show in your life? Do you have male relatives you have to interact with a lot? I assume you don't have male friends, have you ever had them in the past and at some point you decided "nah, this ain't it"? Are you in a job where you have to interact with men a lot? Do you reduce dealing with men when it comes to other things like avoiding places with men? Sorry I'm just curious about it from someone who lives a separatist life!

It's been very easy. I have no interest in men any more. I don't like their personalities and the misogyny of our daily interactions always jumps out to me (weaponized incompetence, interrupting women, disgusting jokes, main character syndrome, viciousness etc) and I just have no tolerance for it. I'm not a lesbian so I'd say there's 0.1% of men who aren't ugly but they immediately become repulsive to me when the casual sexism comes out, which it inevitably does. I don't understand the "radical" feminists who, after seeing men for what they are, don't feel such repulsion and even claim that we need men to be fulfilled. So I don't date men, don't flirt with men, don't take an interest in their lives, don't play the psychologist for them, don't put extra work for them, don't offer my help etc. I just don't care about men. There's no male relative I still see except for my nephew who is a child. I've cut ties with my father years ago specifically for his misogyny and homophobia. I stand by my moral principals no matter what. I don't have male friends and I never have because I never trusted males nor related to them. And I could never be myself around them. I have male co-workers though, I talk about work with them when I need it. I only have real conversations with my female coworkers. And I only joke with women. As a result, I've noticed, only women sit around me and talk to me at work. The guys have given up. However, my manager is a man which is quite annoying. I keep it minimal with him just like with every other males I'm forced to interact with. I keep it professional and cordial, not friendly and sweet.

I make zero effort to please men physically. No make-up, no tight clothes, no long hair, no shaving, no shutting up, no dainty mannerisms. I'm eating what I want, when I want to, and show no remorse unlike a lot of my female peers. And when I'm angry, I don't hide it. And if I need to say something, I say it. A lot of people assume I'm a lesbian based on the fact that I make no effort to attract men. And it's true that I make no such effort. But I also think that if, to attract men, you have to pretend to be a helpless little thing, you can't call straight or bisexual women "lesbians" just for refusing this humiliation. It's called dignity, not lesbianism.

I like women, I try to help them, prioritize them, support them, reassure them, defend them and push them forward. When a woman speaks negatively about herself, I always jump in to correct her. And when a man attacks a woman I intervene. I distribute compliments and encouragements to women. And I point out the misogyny they confront when they don't see it for what it is. I only debate women because I only value women's mind.

If I have to see a doctor, I'll look for a woman every time. Only and only if I can't find a female doctor close to me will I pick a male doctor. My general practitioner is a woman, my podiatrist is a woman, my psychologist is a woman, my radiologist is a woman, my gastroenterologist is a woman etc. Same with a hear dresser, a masseuse, a fitness coach: only women. I only read books from female authors. I try to watch movies with a woman or girl as the main character. Same with video games or music. Though obviously I'm only human and might enjoy a movie or song made by a male sometimes. I try to support female artists and creators by promoting them, buying from them, giving them nice reviews. I avoid places that are filled with men like a gym or café or profession or online space, and I gravitate towards places filled with women.

That's it, that's my daily life. It's taking care of myself and valuing women. It's easy because I enjoy it and it feels natural. I'm following what my guts have always told me. Feminism simply helped me verbalize it.

[miyuskye]

I know I'm reading too much into it, but the way Jon corrects himself, forces to correct himself to call Elias- Jonah really gets to me.

He doesn't do that at the beginning of s5, but around the middle he starts correcting himself and, soon after, Martin does too. They spend all of their time together so I'm thinking that he's either picking up after Jon or he just started doing it when Jon wouldn't stop correcting him if he did not. But he does so in a more uncaring way, like it doesn't really matter, to him, what name they're calling their enemy.

Both Martin and Georgie don't mind which name they give to Jonah, they just want to get rid of the mess he's done and go back to their old world.

Jon, on the other hand, is so stuck on punctuating that he is, Jonah Magnus, as if calling him with a different name might help him distancing from someone he cared for and respected a long time ago. In his dialogue with Georgie he really wants Jonah to be called by his name and surname, as if he is trying to separate the two people in his head. It's probably because he has already reasoned that Jonah Magnus is evil, he concluded that halfway around S3, if I remember correctly. He wants to stick the evil label onto a man he trusted, so that he can give a reason to why he was betrayed. So that it hurts a little less.

I think that Jon felt, of course, betrayed by Elias, by a man he still turned to when he needed help, even after knowing his crimes. And a little part of me wants to believe that Jon would have sat with him if he wasn't so good-hearted at his core. He surely was envious, by his admittance via Martin's words, of his state after the Eyepocalipse...

[michaelawinter]

Andre Nikto head canons

We have little information about Niko but here's what I've gathered..

((Also I'd like to kindly add, hi, hello, my name is Mika and I am a Bosnian. The chances of me adding some accurate slav head canons are always high but never low!!🙏🏻 ALSO IM TERRIBLY OBSESSED WITH NIKTO SO IF ENJOY THIS AND YOU WANT DATING NIKTO HEAD CANONS PLEASE LET ME KNOWWW))

Genuine head canons:

Andre Nikto (Никто) is a (scary) Russian military man, roughly 193/194 centimetres (when you compare him to Simon's height) He suffers with acute dissociative disorder (better said DID) yet is still serving the military cause of how he preforms during battle.., so the military still views him as a ideal soldier for combat despite his disorder..

No hate but from what I've seen in some art works claiming it's his "face reveal" you people have to understand that under his mask, his face is disfigured.. so, no he won't be an attractive super model under that mask of his..

I don't think you people are aware how badass Nikto is as a character, almost SIMILAR as Ghost who's in the military for the same reason as everybody else, to risk their life.

Although judging by Nikto's voice lines, he doesn't care who he's killing..if it were up to him, if his teammates serve him zero purpose he'd care less if they die..(after all, you're just a target..) but being a professional, he can't allow that to happen to his teammates

If you look up closely, Nikto wears a military uniform that is different from everyone else with MP-0 written on it. Now if you don't know, MP stands for Military Police (enforcement agencies connected with, or part of, the military of a state.) and zero next to it meaning "nothing" and this is important which is what Nikto refers himself as..

Yeah so about that..

I have a theory about Nikto's nickname

After being captured and brutally tortured with whatever sick tendency mister Z had in store for him. It was Mister Z that couldn't really get much Information about Andre.

They would start torturing him while repeating to Andre that he's nothing, he's no one, what he is is nothing but what he is is everything. Those words play in the back of his head and they never seen to go away.

(This is extremely relevant cause Mister Z tried to get to know a bit of Andre by looking through some research come to find his citizenship and language are censored making him a nobody. Keep in mind, if he found any information about Andre viewing from personal life etc. it will be used as blackmail..)

After recovering his scars and taken to therapy after 7 years he was diagnosed with DID

NOW moving on to the DID part

(What I said about the fact that people overlook Nikto's disorder, I mean it..

Some don't really write about his disorder which is fine but when someone does it gets messy. )

Alters aren't easy to deal with, it's actually gonna haunt you till the day that you die cause there's no cure for it. And in Nikto's case it's from PTSD and Nikto is very aware of his alters..

Let me tell you how Nikto's disorder affects him. Switching can be consensual, forced or triggered, Nikto values silence as much as the next person cause he's dealing with much inside his head already. The kind of guy that would "watch TV" while dissociating with a 100 yard glare with very slow blinking and a slight headache..

There are times where his personalities would correct him when hes referring to himself (example: I'm up..(his personality correctes him) WE'RE up..)

"He made us do this" (and other voice lines I can't recall..)

Maybe cut bits of an apple with a knife and eat it while watching TV..

He has medication prescribed for him but he didn't wanna depend on medications cause they're just drugs..they're nothing to him but just drugs..

He has dissociative amnesia too, sometimes he would wander around confused maybe even annoyed. The amnesia appears to be caused by traumatic or stressful experiences endured or witnessed..Although the forgotten information may be inaccessible to consciousness, it sometimes continues to influence behavior

Like I said he likes quiet people, someone who doesn't waste their air on small talk..

Example; don't really talk to him about the weather, unless you have something interesting to say but if the conversation is gonna go nowhere , don't talk..he finds that a waste of time

People assume just because he's Russian that he likes vodka, he doesn't like vodka...-He doesn't like any alcoholic beverage cause it makes his problems a lot worse,...maybe If you were lending him some as an offering, he'll take it but he has SOME self control, he's okay with coffee, though..

It's relevant cause he stays awake at late hours since he finds it difficult to sleep, he'll stay up late with no music, nothing, just a silent room. It doesn't matter if he tries the military tactic where you just close your eyes and turn off your thoughts, it's very different when you have voices screaming inside your head...

Despite everything he's still intelligent, so being smart + strength + sharp reflexes and you got yourself a criminal

Death doesn't phase him, but to him death is like sleeping, he's not scared of death considering that he's been through hell those past few months.

He likes the simple things, don't complicate anything..because he's quick with catching an attitude..be blunt and forward and stumble over your words..

Nikto shows confidence in the battlefield,just like König, except he has a high rush of adrenaline and will laugh at the enemies death.

Fun fact: in this one comic Price calls Nikto "psycho"

And it's without a doubt that he is one.., a sadistic, sociopathic, psychopath

After splitting, his alters can and will get more aggressive and do more harm and damage to others cause they're doing the most at protecting the host.. (depending on the alter, some wanna protect him while some wanna hurt him)

Oh by the way about the intelligence part, I mean he has a good good memory with remembering faces..

He doesn't like people looking at him funny, he'll get angry really fast and annoyed at the same time.., he won't show hesitation when it comes to approaching you and asking you what are you looking at (it's like trying to avoid eye contact with a homeless man Infront of a store, that's how scared you would be)

He's slow with jokes or any form of humor that you throw at him??? You'll be excited to tell him a joke, and when you do he just looks at you and tells you never to do that again..,or just straight up tell you he doesn't get it...??? and probably trying to explain it either he gets it or not he'll still tell you that it's not funny

He doesn't argue, or he does? Arguing with him will costs you avoiding getting objects thrown at you so you can get out of his sight..tragic, now you have a teammate that hates your guts and won't apologize for it.

[nekohime19]

Heart behind the lie # 29 : Sworn brother

Wukong is still jelly

There was a tense silence veiling the room, only broken by Mei's uncontrollable laughter. MK awkwardly patted her back (to help her, or to stop her was still questionable), sheepishly looking at everyone that watched her as if she was struck by madness, she might as well be, this wasn't a very laughable situation, thought the sage. 

Sun Wukong tapped deep within himself to not let anger overwhelm him, breathing like his master showed him long ago, trying to not tear the peacock to shreds. He could feel the fearful gazes of the lord's servant, all willing to protect him (something that spoke of a good lord) but ultimately afraid of the great sage, too afraid to step forward. 

“I think I might have misheard.” Muttered Macaque, an obvious lie for a being like himself, he cleared his throat and straightened himself. “It's rare for me to misheard, so I'm giving you another chance to repeat yourself.” This was a clear warning, a chance for the foolish peacock to correct his words, to avoid the bloodbath Sun Wukong would unleash upon him. 

“I think I was clear? The deal is simple, I give you the lantern piece, and in exchange you marry me.” Repeated Cheng, hands on his hips, expression amused, as if he was looking at unfocused children. Sun Wukong gritted his teeth, tail lashing on the floor. 

“This is ridiculous!” Yelled the sage, he threw his arms in the air, appalled by the very existence of such a deal, and glared at the peacock. “You can't force someone to marry you because nobody wants to!”

“First of all, I am a very eligible suitor, mind you.” Huffed the peacock as he showed off his trail, the jade-green feathers long and perfectly groomed, the eyes shining like jewelry. “Second, who are you to decide for the Six-eared Macaque? Are you his mate? One of his suitor?”

“I-I'm…” The sage stuttered, face reddening. 

“He's my friend.” Replied the warrior as he glared at the peacock, fangs showing a bit.

“So he's just a friend. He doesn't have a say in this matter then.” Chuckled Cheng, Sun Wukong was trying very hard to not murder him. 

“He's… he’s special.” Weakly muttered the macaque, his own face reddening. The sage's tail swished happily at that, and he restrained the smitten coo tickling his lips. He also ignored the kids’ awing. Yes, he was special. He was the friend that Macaque could kiss, that had to be special. 

“Special? Dear, I do not mind if you're sleeping with the Monkey King, you can even take him as your lover if you want. I am very open minded.” Sun Wukong's face bursted in a furious red, he opened his mouth, but only gibberish came out. Mei's laughter became even louder. Macaque was dumbfounded once again, not any better than the King, his own face rivaling strawberries. 

“Lord Cheng, sir ?” Tentatively cut the scholar once he regained his footing. “I don't think Macaque's relationship with Monkey King is the problem. If I may ask-”

“You may.” Cut the peacock while he turned towards the fumbling scholar. 

“Why do you wish to marry Macaque?” Carefully asked Tang. 

“I need a partner.” Replied Cheng in a huff, as if it was an incredibly obvious answer. 

“Why?”Insisted the scholar. 

“... I guess you people did not come for the festival. Very well, I will explain. The former King of this city, the venerable Thousands-Winged Owl, passed away without siring any children, and without any close family. In his will, he designed the three lords that were in his service, the Stone-eyed Peacock, the Golden-clawed Crow, and the Serpent-tongued Dove, as heirs. For the throne they will compete in what the King called the dawning festival. It is basically a huge party he organized for his death, inviting everyone he knew, and everyone that wished to come. The rules for us lords are simple, we will not be the one competing against each other, it will be our partners. They will compete in three trials, one involving loyalty, the other wit, and the last one strength, nobody except the King advisor knows anything beyond that. The winner will be given the throne.”

“The guy organized a wife battle.” Snorted the dragon girl. 

“In short, yes.” Laughed Cheng. 

“In this case Macaque is not the most suitable candidate for your situation. He is weakened, he will not do well in the strength trial.” Explained the Bull's son. 

“Are you? Now, that is unfortunate, especially for someone as precious as you. I can accommodate you for your stay here if you wish.” Sun Wukong did not like how precious sounded on the peacock’s lips. 

“I… thanks?” Whispered the warrior, unsure of how to take the lord's kindness. 

“Maybe you can marry someone else?”Tentatively proposed his mentee. 

“Hm, do state all of your names and clans.” Ordered the peacock. 

“Hm, I'm Tang? I'm human.”

“Pigsy. I don't have a clan, I'm a chef.”

“Red Son of the terrific Bull clan. Heir to the Demon Bull King, son of Princess Iron Fan.”

“Mei, part of the dragon of the east clan!”

“I'm MK, I'm not sure what a clan is?”

“My successor.” Clarified Sun Wukong with a growl. 

“In that case, I cannot marry any of you. The mortal will be too weak, the chef too. Even if we ignore the fact that you three are kids, I don't want to anger any of your families. And I cannot marry Sun Wukong, he's a King, more powerful than me, if I marry him I'll have to follow him in his kingdom. Furthermore, I can feel his murderous intent.” 

“At least you're aware of it.” Huffed the sage as he crossed his arms. 

“Is it really specified that your partner must be your wife?” Asked Tang with furrowed eyebrows. 

“The will says exactly : the one bound to you by an oath. Marriage is the easiest oath to make.” 

Tang lit up at that. 

“Well maybe sworn-brotherhood can do then!” Exclaimed the scholar. “Normally, sworn-brotherhood does not need any formal oath, but we can do one for this occasion.”

“Maybe, it could work. Who will be my sworn-brother then?” They all turned towards the sage, Sun Wukong stuttered, caught off guard, and turned away. 

“No way!” Shouted the King. 

“Don't make this difficult, King.” Groaned the pig. 

“You are the strongest, the most likely to win.” Retorted the Bull's son. 

“You don't have to if you don't want to.” Calmly replied the macaque, resolution blooming in his gaze. The sage sighed when he caught sight of this unrelenting gaze. He really didn't want to be associated in any way to this bastard of a peacock, but he didn't want Macaque to be associated with him either. 

“Okay, okay, I'll do it. I'll be the peacock sworn-brother.” Grumbled the sage, his voice becoming more poisonous at the word peacock. 

“Wonderful, Sun Wukong is certainly powerful enough to seal my victory!”Cheered the peacock, he turned towards the King and asked : “What are you wearing?”

“Hm, hoodie and sweatpants? With shades?”

“Prosperous! What are you, rat man? Servants ! Give this monkey proper clothing, take him to Bolin, I refuse to let my sworn-brother be anything less than beautiful! We will do the oath when he's ready!” The lord turned away. “Mui!”

“Yes, my lord!” Replied the parrot. 

“Take the rest of them to their rooms, give them anything they ask for, especially our dearest shadow!”

“Of course, my lord.” The parrot, or Mui, bowed to her lord and walked towards the group. 

“Ah Lam! Take the lantern piece! We will trade when the deal is sealed!” One of the tallest guards approached MK and softly reached out, his mentee hesitated a little, but finally relented the piece. The peacock disappeared in his bathroom, aided by a few of his guards to reach it.

Sun Wukong was taken away by the guards, he pushed them away when they tried to touch him, and followed them with a whipping tail. He saw, from the corners of his eyes, Mui guide the group in another direction. 

The guards guided him to a huge wardrobe, filled to the brim with clothes. They bowed before the lavishly clothed demon swan pacing in the room, the man seemingly high ranked here. 

“The lord asked us to properly clothe this man. He is to be the lord's sworn brother.” Informed the guards. 

“Sworn brother? I see… this could work for the will as well.” Muttered the swan as he let his gaze swept over the sage. “He definitely needs a change of clothes. Our Cheng is picky with appearances. Thanks for guiding him here, you can resume your duties.” The guards bowed and left the room, leaving the sage alone with the demon swan. “You are the Monkey King, aren't you?”

“I am.” Replied the King, daring the other demon to do something with his tone. 

“I am Bolin, our lord's tailor. They call you the Handsome Monkey King, let's see if we can bring that out.” The sage gasped, greatly offended, but he didn't have time to complain, Bolin was already pushing him in an adjoining room, one filled with baths. “Girls!” Immediately a flock of four swan younglings rushed towards them, each dressed in white, elegant gowns. “This is Sun Wukong, the Monkey King. He is to be our lord sworn brother, so let's make him shine like a diamond!”

“Yes, father!” Replied the swan younglings, each with utmost seriousness. 

“Monkey King, sir, what type of fur do you have?” Asked one of the younglings as she intently eyed his sun colored fur, she was a bit skinnier than the others. 

“Short type? I don't have a thick underfur.” Mumbled the sage, a bit caught off guard by their seriousness. 

“I think monkeys are more used to grooming. Can a bath damage your fur?” Asked another, a bit shorter than her sisters. 

“Grooming is for the twigs and bugs. I can take a bath.”

“Perfect !” 

They ushered him to one of the steaming baths, one with lukewarm water according to Bolin (to not damage his fur, they said). Fortunately, they gave him the privacy to change behind a folding screen. He awkwardly removed his clothing and hid his manhood with a white towel he tied on his hips. When he stepped out of the folding screen, they waved him over and made him sit before the bath. They groomed him with a soft brush, untangling all of his knots while Bolin was looking over products and asking some questions about his coat. When his fur was well-groomed (from the tip of his tail to the edge of his toes, they always asked if he was comfortable with touch before grooming a particular area, something the King appreciated), he lowered himself in the bath. 

They added some good-scented products in it, and perhaps some oil that made his coat shinier. The younglings massaged him while he was bathing, delicately treating each of his strands of fur as if it were a treasure in itself. He learned their names while they treated him. The one massaging his shoulders, and doing a wonderful job at it, was Bo, she was seemingly stronger than any of her sisters, and on the brasher side. The skinnier one was named Hua, she was the most knowledgeable when it came to fur care, she did most of the grooming earlier. The shorter one was named Ping, she was the most leveled of the flock, and the most respectful, always asking for his boundaries and reminding her sisters to ask as well. The last one, the rounder one, was named Shu, she was quieter than any of them, and from what he gathered she was the most skilled when it came to make-up. She did ask him what colors he liked, and what he was comfortable with, which he appreciated. 

Once washed and oiled, they dried him with fluffy towels, asking now and then if everything was alright. He was then sitted in a comfortable chair, before a silver mirror. They sharpened his claws, whitened his fangs, oiled his lips and delicately cut his fur to make it even. His eyebrows were brushed and straightened, and the heart-shaped patch of fur on his chest more defined. Once they stepped back, he blinked at his reflection. The glamors he applied on a daily basis were certainly at play, but he looked good. His fur had never been shinier and softer, it looked like the sun itself blessed him. Sun Wukong admired the man in the mirror for a bit, before following Bolin out of the bathroom. 

The swan talked with one of her daughters, Ping, to know what sort of colors would suit him better while the others asked what he was comfortable with, according to them one could only truly shine when they liked what they were wearing. They settled on a peach colored hanfu embroidered with lotus flowers, one he found particularly pretty, with a red slashes. After they dressed him, Shu took care of his make-up while Bo picked jewelry to adorn him. 

Once he was ready, he looked at the man in the mirror and had to restrain his purr. Those swans certainly knew how to dress someone, he almost felt like some sort of deity blessed with heavenly beauty. 

“You look good, Monkey King, sir.” Praised Ping as she softly adjusted his slashes. 

“As expected of the Handsome Monkey King.” Chuckled Bo as she puffed out her chest. 

“You all did a good job.” Muttered the King with reddening cheeks. 

“Alright, girls. I will escort the Monkey King to our lord, clean the room.” Cut Bolin, the swan younglings all sung “Yes, father!” before disappearing in the bathroom. 

Sun Wukong followed Bolin out of the room, they walked in a peaceful silence towards the dining room (when Bolin asked a passing guard, they told him the group was there), their steps echoing in the corridors. The servants that passed by them always made an effort to bow at Bolin, Sun Wukong could see the deep settled respect in their eyes when the swan returned their greeting with a short nod. 

“Are you really just a tailor?” Asked the sage after a bit, his curiosity getting the better of him. 

“I am. Our lord value apparences a lot.”

“He's vain.” Grumbled the sage, his anger sparking anew at the mention of the lord. Bolin looked at him with a raised eyebrow, before letting out a soft chuckle. 

“I know our lord can seem…particular. But he's not bad.”

“I have trouble believing that! He was ready to force someone to marry him.”

“Hm, for the will.” Mumbled the swan. 

“If he wants the throne so badly, he can take it for all I care, but he can't involve others in this.” Huffed the King. 

“... The marriage would have been temporary.” Explained the swan, his tone a little harsher than before.

“Still.” Bolin stopped walking, he turned towards the sage, a storm brewing in his eyes. 

“I know Cheng doesn't seem like the most caring, and mayhaps he offended you in some way. But I will ask you to not talk about our lord in this manner. He is to be your sworn brother, you will see then what kind of person he is.”

“Yeah, I'll see.” Replied the King, tone a little bit softer. He didn't want to offend Bolin, but the feeling brewing inside of him, the ugly beast called jealousy, pushed him to be spiteful towards Cheng. The sage wasn't used to this feeling, thus he had troubles to reign it. 

The rest of the walk was more tense, both decided that silence was better if they didn't want to argue. The dining room was filled with watering smells, all kinds of plates and food, some the sage never even knew existed. The whole group was eating leisurely around a lavish mahogany table, they all turned towards him when he arrived. Bolin bowed to Mui, who was at Macaque's side, and left the room with elegance. 

“Wow, you look good Mister King!” Chuckled the dragon girl. 

“Thanks. I feel good.” The sage turned towards the warrior, who was gaping at him with a flaming face, eyes wide, hands frozen before his plate of mangoes. Sun Wukong felt a pleasant tingle skim above his kin, he walked, deliberately slowly, towards the macaque and sat on the unoccupied chair on his right. He relished in the way Macaque's eyes roamed over him, stuttering for a moment on his hips. “You have something to say, Mac?” Asked the King. 

“What? I, hm, I-I, what ?” Stammered the warrior, his tail trashing the chair's legs. The kids were choking on their own laughter, while the adults were either rolling their eyes or smirking openly. 

“You lost your tongue?” Purred the sage as he leaned over the other, Macaque almost fell out of his chair, his hands tightly gripping the table. Sun Wukong wanted to keep teasing him, but he had to stop once the peacock arrived. 

Cheng was dressed in red, the cloth flowing around his figure like a river of blood, striking against his jade feathers. He had an ebony cane in his right hand, something he used with ease to navigate. He sat in the tallest chair, the one made of pure gold.

“I hope everything was alright for you. I will accommodate you to the best of my ability until the end of the festival.” Started the peacock. “Now, I cannot see you, Monkey King, but I trust Bolin did a wonderful job.” Cackled the lord, Sun Wukong wanted to retort, but unfortunately Bolin did, in fact, a good job. “Concerning this deal of ours, I want it to be clear. Sun Wukong is to aid me as my sworn brother during the dawning festival, of course he will try his best to win, but even in case of defeat, I will give you in exchange the lantern piece you desire.” The sage was quite surprised by the terms, particularly because he wasn't even obliged to win the festival, it almost felt like a trap. “Of course, I will not give you the lanterne piece if I feel that the Monkey King is insincere, and does not do his best to give me victory.”

“... I accept the terms.” Sighed Sun Wukong, he groaned when he caught sight of the blooming smirk on the peacock's lips. 

“Wonderful! Now, for this oath of ours… Normally I believe sworn brotherhood is only made with a promise, but we will need a formal oath that binds us.” The lord sat up and walked towards the sage, his hand tracing the edges of the table to guide himself. Sun Wukong raised himself once Cheng stopped before him, they stood in a tense silence for a second, thoughtful, and then the lord offered his hand. The sage grimaced, and reluctantly took the bird's hand. “I, the Stone-eyed Peacock, Cheng, will take Sun Wukong, the Handsome Monkey King, Great Sage Equal to Heaven, as my brother. As long as he wishes, I will treat him as my blood and flesh, as my friend. I swore on my name and my honor, that I will see in him my own.”

An oath, for demons, was a matter of honor. It was one of the ultimate promises, made with witnesses. Losing honor was a fate no demons wanted, it was worse than death itself. 

“I, the Intelligent Stone Monkey, Sun Wukong, will take Cheng, the Stone-eyed Peacock, as my brother. Until we both gain what we want, I will honor him as my friend. I swore on my name and honor, that I will see in him my brother.” They shook hands before the eyes of Cheng's servants and Sun Wukong's friends, sealing their promises. In the end, an oath was nothing but words, what mattered was what those words meant for the two parties involved. 

“Well, now that this is sealed. If you ever need something, Mui, there, will serve you.” The parrot demon nodded to them, her colorful feathers shaking with her nod. “The festival starts in one week, we do not know the kind of trials that await us. I will not force you to do anything, brother (Wukong cringed at the word) as I know your abilities. But it will be better for us if you follow me to the library. I want you to know what kind of opponent you will go against.” The sage was ready to refuse, not wanting to go anywhere with the other, but Macaque cut him before he could even open his lips. 

“Mui told me you had a lot of books regarding shadows in this library of yours.” Cheng turned towards the macaque (or at least his general direction) and his smile widened, Sun Wukong did not like this look. 

“Yes! I do! Shadows are fascinating. You can accompany me, and Sun Wukong if he accepts to follow, to the library ! I'm quite curious about you, after all.” Macaque rose from his seat, perhaps ready to follow the peacock, but Sun Wukong immediately went in-between them, tail lashing. 

“Let's go to this damn library.” Grumbled the sage, Macaque looked at him with a raised eyebrow, while Cheng tried to hide his chuckle in the crook of his claws. They nodded towards the other (Cheng took back his cane) and they walked away, the sage made a point of walking in-between the two, allowing absolutely no contact. 

“Jealousy does not suit you, brother.” Snorted the peacock. 

“I think you better shut your mouth right now if you value yourself, brother.” Spat the King, a growl echoing in his tone. 

“Can't you both be civil? We're gonna be here for more than a week.” Sighed his moon as he rubbed his forehead. 

“I'll try, but he's really fun to tease, dearest.” Snickered Cheng. 

“Do not call him like that!”

“See, he's fun.” Cackled the peacock, Sun Wukong wanted to bite his head off for daring laughing at him, for daring even breathing in his direction.

“This is gonna be a hellish week.” Grumbled the warrior, and Sun Wukong couldn't agree more. 

[angrybatgaming]

NOOOOOOO!!!!!

GODDAMN YOU, TGC!!!!! YOU COULDN'T KEEP THE SNOW AROUND UNTIL, LIKE, APRIL?????

(Where I live, we sometimes get small snow showers through March and April. Had a snowstorm once on the first day of Spring.)

Oh well. At least I got one last funny snowman pic with Chill Sunbather cosmetics on. The snowboard makes the image even funnier. In my opinion anyway.

Sadly, the sunglasses clip through the bat mask horribly. So I wore the Journey mask with them instead. The Gloating Narcissist hair works so well with the look! If only I had the surfboard. (Too expensive for something that only works on water.)

Grandma, that is NOT a good substitute for firewood. You're scaring Björn!

Björn: ...

And ending this post on a nice landscape shot I took today before signing off of Sky. Next post will be when Season of the Nine-Colored Deer starts! Really looking forward to some of the Asian-inspired cosmetics! (Is it Chinese? Indian? I've never heard of this legend until now, so sorry if I just sounded like an idiot. >_< )

Until next time!

UPDATE

It's Persian!!!! I just looked it up! My bad!

[essektheylyss]

was reminded that people get riled up about this the way they get riled up about pineapple on pizza and honestly, as a knowledge org nerd, it is weird and unnecessary 😌

[felagund-fiollaigean]

do you ever consume a piece of media that speaks to your soul and changes you as a person and inspires hope and excitement in you, and after finishing the story you gleefully open AO3, excited to see works by authors who were touched by those characters as you were, who were inspired by that narrative as you were, authors who you think must be similar to you on some fundamental level because who else would spend real time on transformative works about this story. and you open the tag and start scrolling and realize immediately that everyone else got something very different out of this than you did

[magentagalaxies]

at this point i need to explain ze/zir/zirs pronouns to bruce instead of just going with "any pronouns" mostly for his own sake bc he tried to correct someone who was calling me she/her today and i was like "no it's correct" and he just goes "????? i thought you were a them/they?????" and i just respond "I AM TOO POWERFUL FOR ONE PRONOUN TO CONTAIN"

[rose-tinting]

People often comment on like

the amount of bracelets I wear asking if it bothers me and like

you think I wore something that bothers me??? You think I’d just Subject Myself to something I hate??? lmao

Sure. I’m just Tormenting myself by Voluntarily Wearing Bracelets I don’t Have to wear. Even though I don’t wear makeup most of the time and even when I do it’s literally just eyeliner and eye shadow. Sure. I’m just Torturing Myself for No Reason. I must be.

[knaveofmogadore]

Kfkdks

[genderqueerdykes]

going insane thinking about how a lot of people don't understand that the labels FtM and MtF can also be used to describe intersex experiences and don't always necessarily reflect willing changes or inherently trans experiences. it makes me go insane when i realize i'm MtF but it's impossible to talk about because people don't understand that intersex experiences do not mirror trans experiences 1:1 and they don't have to because they're unique experiences that aren't shared by anyone else.

both trans and intersex experiences deserve equal space to be discussed. sometimes someone's sex changes multiple times. sometimes that's willing, sometimes it's not. whether or not it's voluntary doesn't make it any more important or valid to discuss. people who were born one way but were placed on hormones and/or had corrective procedures done still had a sex change done to them.

i'm MtFtM because i want my body to go back to the way it was before i was forced to undergo "corrective" treatment and procedures. that doesn't make me cis, this is an inherently intersex experience, and it does encompass being both MtF and FtM. it's complicated because of what i've gone through, both of my own volition, and against my will.

let intersex people discuss these experiences and be heard. break down the binary in your mind of what these phrases mean. our lives depend on it.

[a-b-riddle]

Part Five

Can't stop thinking about the attempt of reconciliation and reader ain't having it. Our girl is going to be wilddddd y'all. Also goodnight. See y'all tomorrow (maybe)

You call Meredith when you get home.

You. Are. Fuming. She's not sure she can ever remember a time you using so many swear words at one time.

How fucking dare them? Immature? You're the immature one? You were the one trying your best to salvage four failing relationship meanwhile none of those assholes could be bothered to try and keep one. They had one person to manage: you.

"I wanna go out this weekend." "Wear something tight and borderline risk indecent exposure."

"You know what I always say," Meredith begins. "The best way to get over someone-"

"is to get under someone else." You finish. You weren't exactly keen on the idea of bringing someone to your bed just yet, but a little attention would do you some good. "I don't want to fuck someone just yet." You admitted. "I'm more on the getting drunk and making out."

"I didn't know we resorted back secondary school heavy petting?" She teased.

"University, Dear." You corrected. "I didn't peak until after I graduated."

"No." She argued. "You didn't put your books down long enough to realize that boys actually wanted to fuck you." You were glad she couldn't see you roll your eyes. "Saturday work for you? I have a late night Friday and won't be up for it."

"That works."

"Sorry." She apologized. "I plan on getting you absolutely smashed so I need to be ready to play the nanny. I know how you love to get drunk and run off."

It was true. You had always found it hilarious when you were drunk to just run. Quite literally run away. It got to a point during university where Meredith would handcuff you to her so you didn't stray.

"I won't run." Your sober mind promised.

"Uh huh." Meredith's tone told you that she knew that was a load of shit. "I'll text Tabs. Let her know the plan."

The next day at the shop was pretty uneventful. No more unexpected visitors. You still had them all blocked. Not caring if now they decided to offer up some bullshit apology.

Months. This had been a steady decline for six months. A text or a simply sorry won't fix this. You weren't sure anything could.

But it didn't matter. You were done and they obviously were too.

You had picked up enough take out to feed a family, but you didn't plan on making your lunch before work or cooking when you got home. The rest of the week you planned on just going through the motions until you could go out Saturday and hopefully get everything out.

You weren't paying attention as you walked down the hallway to your flat. Fishing in your purse for keys. You were at almost at your door when you saw him.

Sitting next to your door was a familiar face. A face you felt you haven't seen in forever.

“What are you doing here, Kyle?" Your voice was flat as you continued to blindly try and find your keys with one hand. Fuck. You really need to clean out your purse...

“My key wouldn’t work.” He explained. "So I’m out here.”

"I'm aware why you're not in my apartment since I changed the locks," you said, trying to keep your irritation at bay. "What I am asking is why did you come here?"

"You won't return any of our messages."

"You're all blocked, so technically I didn't really get any messages." "Besides, you don't get to complain to me about not responding to texts, Kyle Garrick." Your fingers finally wraps around them. God bless. "If you're here for your things, it'll have to wait. I have to sort through everyone's shit and I don't know whose is whose."

"We need to talk." He explains as you put the key into the lock, opening the door.

"Nah," you say scrunching your nose in that way he used to adore. "I'm good. But you can swing by tomorrow and pick up your things if you'd like." You say before trying to shut the door on him. You were stupid in thinking you could be faster than him.

Dammit.

"I know things haven't been good and I've definitely could have been better,'' he admits. "But can you at least try and let us apologize? Let us try and work it out."

"No." You answered, trying to close the door. Not caring if you had to resort to kicking his shins to get him out.

"Why not?" He countered.

“Maybe because I've already tried, Kyle?” You gave up on trying to shut him out. You were strong, but he didn't have any issues in besting you. “Because I actually tried with you. With all of you. You didn’t need to come here giving me excuses about your life being hectic because I’ve made the excuses for you.” You didn't miss how he practically flinched. He had always blamed his busy life. Family. Work. You stopped caring about whatever excuse he gave you and realized it was just that. An excuse. “I’ve been telling myself for months that everything you guys didn’t do for me wasn’t because you didn’t care about me. It was because of the stress of your deployments is the reason none of you tell me when you get back from until it’s time to fuck. I tell myself it’s because of the fucked up situation of me being with all of you that makes it awkward to meet your families. Families you all have that I now know I’m not worthy of meeting.” He wanted to correct you. You were. You were worthy. He was an idiot. “It’s not that I need your excuses to make me feel like what you did was justified. No matter what it was, it was apparently to you because you did it.”

He took a step back, processing everything you had said. He had been selfish. You were the reliable constant in his life. Someone he believed he never disappointed. Someone he couldn't disappoint no matter how many times he fucked up.

You took the opportunity to slam the door. Quickly turning the lock before he had a chance to open it back up.

God...

That felt good.

You had spent that evening collecting their thing in case Kyle did show back up tomorrow. You wouldn't make their lives easier by sorting all their shit and organizing it. Everything. One box. Let them figure it out. You almost had a mind to add a shirt that you knew didn't belong to any of them just to have them argue over it. Or least make them think there was someone else...

You were almost tempted if not for the premise that you wanted them to realize this was their fault. Their fuck up. But now that you were officially all broken up, you were free game.

[ozzgin]

Omg bro yk whats been on my mind for do long?? A demon king trying to court a hero reader. Like the hero has already fought and defeated the king but somehow he comes back and he's desperately trying to get the hero to join him (in more ways than one). He wants the reader to be his spouse and leader of his army against the corrupt human race and the reader (now fallen from stardom due to the evil kings defeat) just wants him gone and to be left alone. Idk if this makes sense but I need to see SOMEONE write abt it before I lose my last marble.

-Doll

This is giving me Dragon Quest vibes, haha. Not a trope I'm too familiar with, but it sounds interesting nonetheless. I shall do my best! Sorry for the delay, I hope it's close to what you imagined. :)

Yandere! Demon King x Hero! Reader

As it goes with villains, they always find a way to return. This time, the Demon King has a different plan in mind. You were prepared for anything, from evil schemes to ancient conjured weapons...except for a wedding ring cordially placed before you. Do you say yes?

Content: gender neutral reader, monster romance, 🔥proposal (literally)

[Part 2]

You still remember everything so fondly. How you crawled out of that enormous crater, body battered and weak, as everyone watched in horror and held their breaths. Finally, you raised your fist victoriously. The Demon King had been, at last, defeated. The people cheered and cried and pulled you up under thundering waves of applause. Peace was no longer just a dream.

A sweet, innocent memory, even more so given its fleeting nature. The genuine smiles of gratitude quickly turned into crooked grins asking for favors. Before you knew it, you became some sort of political accessory to convince the masses. Posing for photos, shaking hands, being interviewed with bizarrely planned questions reeking of propaganda. You suddenly felt burdened, heavy, disappointed. This was not the kind of fame you envisioned for yourself.

Thus, you gradually vanished from the limelight, keeping your distance from everyone else and spending most days in solitude. Better than having to look into those unscrupulous, opportunistic eyes measuring up your worth. You had fulfilled your job and purpose.

This morning you're woken up by the sound of your belongings rattling in their shelves. The wooden frame of your bed is creaking, and you struggle to get up. An earthquake? A wave of nausea flushes over you. You recognize this feeling all too well, though you never expected to deal with it again. This is a disaster alright, yet the forces of nature have nothing to do with it.

You rush outside, swinging the door open and nearly tripping in your hurry to confirm your suspicions: the demonic creature is approaching your humble adobe with heavy steps, as the ground crumbles and shatters underneath. The Demon King himself, in flesh and blood. Although the blood splattering his armor is most likely not his. Same for the visceral remains threading his weapon. Regardless, your jaw tightens nervously, and you stand back, in a defensive pose. "You're a stubborn one", you say smugly, trying to maintain your composure. "Can't say I'm a fan of dying, that is correct." A ragged, monstrous voice erupts from the tall, armored figure.

"What brings you back?" You demand. The surroundings are too peaceful for him to have tampered with the city. Did he stop by to formally announce his destruction? "I have an offer that might interest you." The Dark Overlord has closed the distance between you, now looming above your much smaller body. You shiver. "I don't barter with Demons!" You conclude, turning around, prepared to leave. "Even when your precious people are on the line?" The horned beast warns with a grin. "If there's nothing better to do as a Ruler of Realms than killing petty humans..." You swiftly retort, going back into your house and slamming the door shut.

He stands for a moment, speechless. "Y-your Majesty? Should I take care of the humans, or (Y/N)?" Only now he notices his scaly butler, bowing to his side with claws resting over the weapon. The Demon King raises a hand, shooing the servant away. The annihilation of the human race can wait. There are more important matters to deal with presently. He'd expected your rejection, naturally, but not in such fashion. The indifference, the flat voice, the empty eyes devoid of emotion. Have the city dwellers tampered with his hero? He expected to see your fierce rage and in return he was met with a hollow shell.

Bright blue flames erupt from the openings of his armor, resulting in a menacing show of lights. He's known it for the longest time, of course. Humans are rotten to their very core. Vile, deceitful creatures that have slithered their way up, exuding undeserved arrogance. He's been trying to show you this very fact, yet you were blinded by naive faith. Your unwavering, honest heart that won him over has turned out to be your early demise. Not anymore. His vengefulness knows no bounds when it comes to traitors.

The sudden spike in temperature alerts you. Was it your rudeness that angered the Demon? You don't care anymore. Whatever happens to the city is out of your hands. And yet...you're buckling the straps of your old suit made for battle. Sword in hand, you gaze at your reflection. What could the Beast want? The fortified city no longer holds the value of its olden days. Just like you've left your hero days behind. Without much contemplation, you run out and head for the main gates. The path is paved with ash and rubble and your grip on the weapon tightens. Regret immediately wells up in your chest, ready to burst out. Is it too late? The entrance is engulfed in fire, charred corpses toppling against the ruins of the walls.

You reach the town hall - or rather, what remains of it - and face the Demon King. Has he gotten stronger since your last encounter? You hold your breath as the horned monster turns towards you. "I've tried to tell you, again and again. Time after time." He sighs, defeated. "Between the two of us, I'd say you were the stubborn one all along." His voice is softer than what you would've expected from someone that had just massacred an entire settlement. There's not a single scratch or sign of struggle. Was he merely holding back during your last fight? One thing is certain: you're his final obstacle. You raise your sword, determined. Hot sweat trickles down your face as the flames surround you. "Well, at least you've convinced yourself now, I hope. There's nothing left for you here." The Demon King lowers himself, extending a fist towards you. A spell? Secret weapon? Your leg muscles contract in anticipation.

His fingers open and stretch out, slowly. In his palm, a barely noticeable ring. Given the ridiculous size difference, you assume this is better fitting for a human. You stare at it in confusion, discerning the wedding vows carved in the noble metal. "What's the meaning of this?" You mutter, glancing at the Beast now resting on one knee before you. "What? Is it not your human custom?" He looks away for a moment, clicking his tongue. "That useless butler. He told me- Forget it! You are to return with me to my Kingdom. As my spouse."

Of all the things you've prepared yourself for...Your brows furrow and your mouth hangs open in shock.

What is your answer? The Demon King will not leave empty-handed.

[cryptidghostgirl]

The Love (Alastor x Reader)

Pairing: Alastor x Reader

Description: Alastor is drunk and Charlie asks him if he has ever been in love.

Warnings: I don't think there are any but correct me if I'm wrong.

Word Count: 1,323

Master Lists:

Master Lists 

Hazbin Hotel Master List

A/N Y'all, I'm lowkey dying from the requests. I'm sorry for the last five or so taking so long, I just need a little break and mix in some of my own ideas if that is okay.

Alastor was drinking at the bar with Husk, Charlie, and Angel. The day had been a lot, seeing Mimzy was always a lot. Yes she was trouble, but Alastor loved her. He loved her for the same reason he was trying to drink himself stupid at the bar. He loved her because she reminded him of Y/n. Mimzy had been her friend first, after all.

He sat off to the side in his own little world while Angel and Charlie chatted and Husk obediently poured the drinks. Normally, Husk would have joined the pair in the mindless, mundane chatter but after the events of the day, Alastor's presence kept him silent.

"No way!" Charlie exclaimed.

She and Angel were talking about some TV show they both watched or another. A mind numbingly boring background noise but, Alastor wasn't complaining.

"Yes! They are one hundred percent perfect for each other." Angel replied animatedly.

"Literally how. Name one thing that shows they have good chemistry."

"Uh, they’re constantly at each other's throats? If that's not love, I don't know what is."

"Angel?"

"Yeah?"

"You don't know what love is."

Husk let out a short, sharp laugh as he topped off Angel's drink.

"Oh yeah? Well then, Princess, what do you think love is."

Charlie sighed, leaning her elbow on the counter as a dreamy look spread across her face.

"Love is... love is when you would do anything for the person. It's when they're your guiding star, your... your prayers answered."

"Uh, no? Love is when you want to literally kill the person but like, in a good way."

"Angel, what does that even mean." Charlie laughed.

"It means... it means there is passion. That spark everyone always talks about? It's violence."

"Hey Al!" Charlie suddenly called, leaning back in her seat to peer at Alastor behind Angel's back, "Who's right, me or Angel?"

Alastor looked up from his glass.

"I hate to say it, but neither of you are correct." he sighed in irritation at having been disturbed, "Love is neither a constant fight nor a blind devotion, though it contains aspects of both."

"Like you know anything about love, mister fancy talk creepy voice." Angel scoffed, turning to face Alastor as well now.

"Actually, I do."

Charlie's face lit up. She practically vibrated with anticipation.

"Alastor! You've been in love!?"

Normally, on a night like this, he'd be alone. He'd be careful to be alone, or at least have Husk as his only company. When he told Husk to shut up and pour, he listened. Other people, not so much.

"Yes."

Charlie had stars in her eyes. She inched closer to him.

"Are you gonna spill?" Angel asked after a moment.

"It was a long time ago."

Alastor took a long sip from his glass.

"Do you... do you not remember it?" Charlie asked, her excited smile slipping slightly at the notion

Maybe it was the drink. Maybe it was the long day, Lucifer, Mimzy, Husk. Those shark demons. Maybe it was just that secretly all along, he had wanted someone to talk to. He watched the liquor in his glass as he swirled it gently.

"It was a long time ago, but I still remember it." his smile softened as he spoke, "It's strange. I remember her laughter, her little quixotic tendencies. I remember the way her eyes would light up when she smiled and the way her perfume smelled. I know her favorite author, the way she took her coffee, the way she folded her clothes but, I can't seem to ever see her face anymore. I..."

He trailed off, taking a breath.

"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to." Charlie quickly said, not wanting to make Alastor uncomfortable.

Alastor shook his head.

"I've spent years not talking about her. Maybe... maybe something else would be nice."

"So, how'd you guys meet?" Charlie immediately asked.

Alastor looked up at her and let out a light chuckle. He felt like he was human again for a moment. It was odd.

"I don't know if you know this about me, but I was a radio broadcaster back when I was alive. A rather famous one at that, in New Orleans at any rate. Her family ran a restaurant near the studio that I went to get lunch at from time to time. She worked there as a server."

"And she loved you?" Angel asked, "Like, you weren't just delusional?"

"I was quite the lady's man back in my day."

"Uh-huh." Angel doubtfully replied, "Sure."

"Oh hush, Angel." Charlie shoved the spider demon slightly, "Tell us more! What was she like? Did you ever get together or were you just friends? Gah! I wanna know everything!"

"She was..." Alastor's gaze fell back to his glass, "you remind me of her in a way. She was so idealistic, so driven. So... bubbly. She worked hard and she cared deeply. I don't know how I swung her, despite my charms. We were friends for about a year. The whole time, I was trying to work up the courage to ask her out but she ended up being the one to ask me. We got married when we were in our mid twenties. I only had a few years with her as my wife before I died."

Unbidden ideas darkened the edges of his mind. Y/n had always been so good, so sweet. Alastor had no idea if she had ever learned of his... escapades. He figured she must know, considering the manner in which he died but it was a horrifying thought. He was grateful when Charlie spoke again, pulling his mind back to the present.

"Thats so cute!" Charlie exclaimed, clapping her hands as she looked between Alastor and Angel, searching for similar excitement.

"Can we meet this alleged doll of yours?" Angel asked, "Cause I am really not believing any of this bullshit your spouting."

Charlie gasped, suddenly struck by inspiration.

"Do you think she would want to be redeemed?"

"Oh dear," Alastor shook his head, meeting Charlie's eyes, "she's not here."

"Then wh-"

"She's in heaven?" Angel exclaimed, "You married someone who ended up in heaven?"

"Either that or she's over a hundred years old and still on earth." Alastor weakly joked.

"I'm sorry."

Alastor shrugged, downing the rest of his drink.

"No!" Charlie insisted, "You'll... you'll never get to see her again! That's so sad!"

"And here I thought you were trying to get us redeemed." Angel scoffed.

Charlie turned to him.

"I'm trying to get you redeemed cause you're a guest. Alastor isn't a guest."

"Right you are, my dear."

"But you could do that." Charlie said turning back to Alastor, "Angel's right, if you were a guest you could be redeemed. You could see her again!"

Alastor smiled kindly at the excited demon. He patted her back.

"I'm afraid I don't think that's an option."

"But why not!" Charlie insisted, "Anyone can be redeemed, Alastor."

"That's not the issue, my dear." he sighed, "I did some things on earth that she would most certainly view as... unfavorable shall we say? Things she most certainly learned of after my death."

"You're not even gonna give it a shot?" Angel asked.

"Yeah, come on Alastor. Let us help you. You never know how it could turn out!"

"It's alright. I have the time we spent together, the memories. I don't want to taint that." he slowly, unconsciously, raised a hand to his chest, his palm over his heart, "The love is still there, thats what matters."

The quartet fell silent as Husk poured Alastor another drink. Alastor sighed, grabbing the glass and examining it carefully, but not taking a sip.

"What was her name?" Charlie asked, her voice small and her smile long gone.

"Y/n."

It had been years since he'd said it out loud. His tongue relished every syllable.

"Her name was Y/n."