#according to their birth certificates

[snowe-zolynn-rogers]

Question for your charming actor AU. Who is the younger twin between Solar and Eclipse?

Also, does KC rap to embarrass his sons as per actor shenanigans? Gotta put something into the SoundCloud rapper joke 🤣

KC isn't as good at rapping in the actor AU, it's more of a joke on set that he's just pretty good at rhyming without thinking about it and talking fast.

He does embarrass the twins regularly, though, by talking about his Tinder escapades with the older actors on set, who all routinely go through KC's Tinder (and Grindr) and all judge KC's potential matches with him.

The twins are actually complicated, they were born the night Daylight Savings Time falls back an hour at 2am. Eclipse was technically born first at 1:57 am Pre-Fall Back Time, then Solar was born thirty minutes later at 1:27am (Post-Fall Back Time). So Eclipse is somehow the firstborn youngest and Solar is the secondborn oldest.

[replacementbassistfromgorillaz]

you can't doxx me if i don't have any papers to leak

[metanarrates]

I haven't seen a lot of coverage in the news about this, but my state has just advanced legislation on a bill that would criminalize trans bathroom use in publicly owned buildings. this could mean up to 6 months in jail and up to $1000 in fees for those convicted.

most alarming aspects of this bill:

-"publicly owned buildings" include airports, schools, libraries, government offices, some hospitals, and most terrifyingly AND explicitly within the bill, domestic violence shelters and rape crisis facilities. transgender people, who are estimated to be almost 4 times more likely to be victims of violent crimes than cisgender people, could become criminalized in the very spaces they seek out to shelter from abuse.

-on that note, the bill potentially threatens federal funding of already-underfunded domestic violence and sexual assault facilities. to recieve federal grants, facilities are required to follow nondiscrimination laws. this law could place the facilities in danger of losing the grants they rely on. this is severely going to impact victims' abilities to access critically needed services.

-the bill legally defines "sex" in a way that has a lot of potential impact across state legislature. according to the bill’s text, HB 257 would legally define a female as “an individual whose biological reproductive system is of the general type that functions in a way that could produce ova,” and a male as “an individual whose biological reproductive system is of the general type that functions to fertilize the ova of a female.” this could effectively end the state's legal recognition of trans people.

-the bill demands that trans people who DO use bathrooms in publicly owned buildings must have undergone both gender reassignment surgery and have had their birth certificate changed. this has several issues, obviously, but the biggest one I want to highlight is that this opens the door to potential genital inspection by law enforcement if someone is accused of being transgender in a bathroom. in addition to any other indignities suffered by being harassed by cops when trying to use the restroom, it is completely possible for law enforcement to now demand to see whether someone's genitals are in compliance with these laws. it's an unconscionable and humiliating invasion of privacy.

-the bill requires trans students to develop a "privacy plan" with their school in order to arrange access to unisex spaces. if unisex bathrooms are unavailable, the student can be granted access to a sex-designated space “through staggered scheduling or another policy provision that provides for temporary private access.”

-the bill allows the state’s attorney general to impose a fine of up to $10,000 per day on local governments that don’t enforce the bill. in essence, any government that isn't sufficiently committed to enforcing these draconian laws may face massive fines until they have reached the attorney general's standard of enforcement.

this is one of the most unbelievably severe anti-trans laws that have ever been proposed in the united states. it would effectively ban trans people from participating in public life, harm nearly every single victim of domestic violence and sexual assault who seeks services in the state, enforce criminality on random trans people in bathrooms, and open every single person who could be potentially accused of being trans up to a wave of harassment and discrimination from both private citizens and law enforcement. I'm not being hyperbolic when I say that this law would literally force me and my transfemme fiancee to flee this state.

the law's been fast tracked to an insane degree through the legislature. similarly to the anti-dei bill currently making its way through, it's only been a week since it was introduced, and it's already passed the house, and is now up for vote in the senate. if it passes both sets of votes, the only thing left in its way is the governor's decision to veto.

please share this post. make as much noise as you can. if you live in utah, please call and email your district senator as soon as possible. it doesn't matter how late you see this. the bill is up for vote this week (1/23/24 at the time of writing) and we need to do whatever we physically can to protest its passing. we've already moved past the opportunity for public comment on the bill, but a few organizations have called for a rally at the capitol steps on thursday (1/25/24) at noon. if you are in the salt lake area or are able to make it there, please consider attending. wear a mask and bring a sign. we are stronger together.

[the-witchhunter]

DP x DC: Ghost x Family

So, back on my cute romcom BS

So the premise. Dani, as Danny's speed grown clone, wasn't the most physically stable. Turns out, it's really hard to speed grow a clone, and even harder when ectoplasm is involved. There's not enough time for the structures to properly stabilize and that leaves the cellular structure pretty weak and prone to breaking down into goo. The ecto dejecto was just a temporary solution and other measures were needed

aka Dani had to essentially grow a body from scratch the old fashion way, so she's now physically her actual age minus a couple months

So Danny, at the age of 20, is the father of a 4 year old Dani and is trying to keep a low profile in Gotham. His and his daughter's existence is still illegal, and being the single father of a 4 year old ghost girl isn't exactly easy. Now Danny has to deal with the very real threat of CPS being called on him by a neighbor, and trying to get Dani into school without either of them having papers for their assumed identity of Danny and Dani Nightingale and money to by fake documents. He'd ask Tucker, but that requires braking radio silence and potentially putting a target on all three of their backs.

Danny, desperate, asks his neighbor Jason to pose as his significant other for a meeting. Jason agrees, but things escalated and frankly he's now emotionally invested and committing to the bit

So now he and Danny have legally been married for about 4 months according to the papers Babs made them. The fake ID, birth certificates, SSNs, and high school diploma for the Nightingales were simple enough for her to do, but man Jason is going to owe her a BIG favor for this.

They move in together, Dani goes to a good private school, Jason is effectively Danny's sugar daddy paying for a sizable chunk of all this, and they are committing to the loving married couple bit, which is hard to do when the new in-laws are detectives

The best part?

Danny has not figured out Jason is the Red Hood, and Jason doesn't know about the ghost stuff. The only one that does? Dani, and she is physically and mentally 4 and watching Jason and Danny fall in love

oh the shenanigans

OR

I've been watching SPY x FAMILY and just need the fake relationship/family turns into a real relationship/found family dynamic. Jason is basically Loid, Danny is pretty much Yor, Dani fills the role of Anya, and uncle Dick is Yuri, except he's doting on Dani.

Dick is a smart man, but I love the headcanon that Jason is his emotional blindspot. Jason? MY Littlewing? He couldn't possibly.

[daydreamerwonderkid]

Me, after doing 15 minutes of excessive googling on every Batfam member's birthday only to then realize I've accidentally missed the majority of them this year, and then also finding out that people are still aggressively debating over whether Bruce's birthday is April 7 or February 19, Dick's birthday happens 3-6x throughout the year, and Stephanie might have just popped into existence for all that DC cares:

Batfam birthday dates btw for anyone who needs them are listed beneath the cut:

DISCLAIMER: DC is notorious for being super inconsistent with everything and I am a mere tadpole caught in the tidal wave of DC's ocean. This post will be regularly updated with edits and corrections so please do not use it as word of law, I am begging you.

Update (8/24/23): To keep things more simple and easier for everyone I am going to start categorizing the birth dates I've collected into 3 categories.

-Most popular: Self-explanatory. These are the birth dates that have been canonized and confirmed by DC and are also more wildly celebrated by the fandom. Typically, this should be the first result you see when you google the character's birthday. But not always because DC sucks ass.

-Other date(s): These are the additional birth dates I come across that have been canonized in some form with multiple sources, but are not as wildly celebrated or popularized by DC and/or the fandom. Why am I including them here? Mostly because I don't want people coming in saying I forgot a date. But also because if I have to see this mess, then y'all have too as well.

-Potential but unconfirmed date(s): This is where I will put all the other additional dates I find, but specifically those that are lacking in complete sources or seem to be highly debated and scrutinized.

Also fun emoji ranking guide for me and me alone:

👑👑: Queen Shit. Characters with a consistent and simple birth date(s). Can absolutely do no wrong.

👑😮‍💨: In the Running. Characters who don't have a set birth date, but the mess is minor and completely DC's fault. They shouldn't have to be punished for DC's crimes.

🤡🤡: Gtfo. Shit is so inconsistent and stupidly messy that it's making me lose my shit. I'm putting DC and the characters on trial for this bullshit.

👑Alfred Pennyworth👑

Most popular: August 16

Other date(s): April 8 and March 31

(I think it'd be hella cute if Jason and Alfred shared a bday. But if you keep scrolling through the rest of the list, you'll see that August is kind of an overcrowded bday month for the Batfam.

Depending on what you prefer, though, I still think Alfred's worth being celebrated. Lord knows he deserves a special day for himself)

(Update ((8/24/23)): No big inconsistencies between these dates. I just thought it would be fun to provide some info on why Alfred has two canonical birthdates.

So the reason August 16 is viewed as the most popular is for two main reasons. One, obviously, is that he shares a birth date with Jason Todd. So many fans latch onto this date because of how sweet it is for them to share a birthday together.

The second reason has to do with the origin of the birth date. This is because of the more recent retcon that was made by the prequel comic to the Injustice: Gods Among Us video game that was published in 2013. There is a panel in the comic that shows Alfred's birth certificate in full detail from his full name, his place of birth, etc.

As for April 8, this specific date technically has more history compared to August 16. Fans will cite that April 8 was the official date selected by DC according to their Super DC Calendar back in 1976 (which btw was made in 1975).

Compared to August 16 and April 8, however, March 31 oddly enough isn't that popular or recognized by DC or the majority of the fandom. The reason March 31 does come up is because March 31, 1943 was the date when Alfred made his first appearance in the comics, one day after Bruce/Batman)

🤡Bruce Wayne🤡: Hey. Hey, DC, look at me. Bitch.

Most popular: February 19 or April 7

Other date(s): April 25, May 27, March 30, "October," October 7, and "November"

(It looks like most people go with February 19, but don't come at me if you're a April 7 truther. I'm just existing)

(Update ((8/20/23)): I'm gonna shoot somebody. So after doing a little bit more research, I came across-you'd never guess it-even more conflicting info on when Bruce's birthday is supposed to take place.

While April 7 and February 19 are still popular days for fans to celebrate Batman's bday, March 30 is also considered a popular date due to March 30, 1939 being the day Detective Comics #27 ((the issue Batman debuted in)) was put on shelves.

HOWEVER, even Batman's debut is contested to actually be May 27, 1939 because despite the fact that Detective Comics #27 first appeared to the public on March 30, 1939, the cover issue depicted May 27, 1939 instead.

This is because it was a popular practice for comics publication houses to falsify their cover dates as a way to give the impression that the latest issue was newer than it actually was. So if you really, really wanna get super fucking technical about it ((and I know there are some of you out there who do)), Batman may have debuted on March 30, but the cover-issue date was May 27 so, yes, I guess Bruce could have been a May baby instead.

I hate it here.

Oh, and to make matters more complicated, let's discuss the issue of April 7 vs April 25. So the reason April 7 is a popular bday for Bruce is because the original 1930-40s run just outright stated that April 7 was his birthday. Simple enough.

So what does April 25 have to do with this? Well, that's because technically-I think I hate that word now btw-Batman didn't get his own solo comic until April 25, 1940. If you want to go by April 25 because of this logic, however, that means that you'd have to share Bruce's birthday with the Joker. Because guess what? That's also the exact date that the Joker debuted.

I'm personally not a huge fan of Bruce and the Joker sharing a bday. Mostly just because the dates are clearly already complicated enough. But also I feel like April 25 is just known as the Joker's bday at this point, at least in the DC fandom. And Bruce has so many options at this point that it'd be kinda silly to make them share a bday.

As for the "sometime in October" and "sometime in November" additions, we have Batman The Animated Series and Frank Miller's "Batman: Year One" to thank for those extremely vague options.

BTAS Bruce states that his birthday is "sometime in October" and "Batman: Year One" Bruce is responsible for "sometime in November." I repeat: I hate it here.

So when is Bruce's actual birthday? Well, the latest change that DC has "officially" made was the February 19 retcon during the 1970-80s. When a fan sent a question into Detective Comics about Bruce's birthday, the answer given was "February 19" in the letter column. Issue #494, to be exact.

And the reason this answer was given? Because the Super DC Calender for 1976 (again made in 1975) said so.

However, there are still people who prefer to celebrate his bday on April 7 or March 30 instead. And there's also a question floating around if the New 52 run could potentially retcon Bruce's bday AGAIN at some point in the future.

I. Hate. It. Here.

Personally, I liked February 19 because then Alfred could maybe have the month of April to himself. But after seeing all this new info, I'm just sort of resigned to whichever date that the fandom prefers. Y'all can decide. I don't have any energy left.

Also, I can't believe I have to accuse Bruce of having possibly taught Dick his bday scam. Just .... wow).

(Update ((8/24/23)): Well, DC did it to me again. I found this extra little tidbit while googling the Super DC Calendar for Alfred, actually.

So Issue #10 of the 2021 Legends of the Dark Knight decided to give the BTAS's "sometime in October" an actual sometime.

How do I feel about yet another Bruce Wayne bday retcon? Honestly, I think I'm moving closer and closer to just a bland state of acceptance at this point. Tbh, I don't think all these retcons actually matter that much in the end. DC is gonna keep being DC.

Which is annoying. But Idk I'm personally gonna stick with February 19. No shade to you if you prefer any of the other dates. I just like February 19 more than the others)

👑Kate Kane👑

Most popular: March 21

Other date(s): January 26

(So ... where to start to with this one?

Well the official DC canon birth date for Kate Kane is listed as March 21. That being said, if you were to google Kate's birthday right now, you might be confused because that's not the first result that comes up.

Instead, you'll be greeted with January 26, 1990.

So what gives? If there's already an official DC approved birth date, then why the fuck is January 26 coming up all of a sudden?

Well, folks, you have the CW's Batwoman to thank.

Tbh I was very confused as to how I completely missed that there was an entire Batwoman TV show in the first place.

Apparently the show is considered a part of the CW Arrowverse (in reference to the CW show Arrow featuring Oliver Queen, for those of you who need extra info) and ran for 3 whole seasons before being cancelled on April 9, 2022.

And they gave us actual canon lesbian Kate Kane rep. I mean, she is a lesbian. But yeah. CW actually acknowledged her sexual orientation. So kudos for doing the bare minimum?????

Anyway, I guess the showrunners just decided they wanted Kate's birthday to be on January 26 instead of March 21??? Idk if this was supposed to be a reference or an homage to Cassandra Cain's birthday. I doubt it, but who knows?)

🤡Dick Grayson🤡: Greedy bitch who keeps lying about his birthday so he can scam people into giving him more presents jk jk

Most popular: "On the first day of spring" (bruh) or March 20/21

Other date(s): March 6, "April," October 24 (aka "the week before Halloween"), November 11 and December 1

Potential but unconfirmed date(s): June 24

(Dick's canon bday seems to be influx. March 6, March 20, March 21, November 11, June 24, December 1, and so on. I did see multiple sources state Dick was born "on the first day of spring." I'm unclear atm about whether this is a fanon take or if it was actually stated in a particular comic at some point.

As far as I'm concerned, Dick just keeps lying about his birthday for the lols)

(Update ((8/24/23)): Well, guess what I found, folks?

It's a return visit from our favorite friend, the Super DC Calendar of 1976. And according to it, Dick's birthday should be November 11.

You can also thank the Young Justice comic for the confusion surrounding Dick's bday being on December 1.

Also, I found this post by @theflyingwonder that helps clear up a LOT of the mess surrounding Dick's ever changing birth date. Honestly, amazing work and extra kudos to them for putting all the work in and finding all the sources. I just wished I had found their post earlier, holy shit.

And if you have some extra time, please give some love to @inkydandy for their hilarious and very sweet comic about all the confusion that comes with Dick's bday)

(Update ((8/25/23)): Many thanks to @poisoned-ivy for clearing up even more of the mess surrounding Dick's bday. I went ahead and took a screenshot of their response to my old "Which date is Dick's canon bday?" poll.

They also provided a link to the DC Universe Calendar which was lovingly compiled from the original 1976 Super DC Calendar and then put together by the people who run the Five Earths Project .

Also found out from them today that October 24 is one of Dick's bdays ((at least for Post-Crisis Dick Grayson)). So that was a fun new discovery!

They were also very helpful in helping me realize that the original article I had found that stated "sometime in April" was actually in reference to Dick Grayson's first appearance in the comics, which was April 1940.

So, yes, "sometime in April" is technically--again I hate this word so much now--still a valid candidate for Dick's bday. And before you ask: Detective Comics #38 was actually published on March 6, 1940.

Hence why people will cite March 6 as Dick's canon bday instead.

This project got a lot bigger than I ever expected it to ... god)

👑Barbara Gordon👑: September 23

👑Jason Todd👑: August 16

👑Cassandra Cain👑: January 26

👑Tim Drake👑: July 19

👑Stephanie Brown😮‍💨: She emerged from the void with the sole purpose of dragging Bruce's ass to hell and back. Nothing can stop her. We all exist in her world now.

Potential but unconfirmed date(s): June 23, "August," or August 11

(For real, though, some peeps will say June 23 since the month she officially debuted in the comics was June 1992.

But I've also seen August 1992 listed as her bday month as well--lot of August babies in the Batfam, huh--but I haven't found June 23 specifically listed as her canon bday, either. It honestly feels like the fans are putting in more work than DC at this point. Which, like, I'm not surprised. Just disappointed)

(Update ((8/24/23)): Someone mentioned August 11 as a potential birth date, but I have yet to see an actual source that specifically states this. If I do find one, I'll edit this section. Figured I should put it here just in case, though)

👑Duke Thomas👑: August 13

👑Damian Wayne👑: August 9

👑Terry McGinnis😮‍💨

Most popular: August 18

Other date(s): June 27 or August 10

Potential but unconfirmed date(s): September 19 (fml)

(Yes, I'm including Terry, fuck you lol

Also SERIOUSLY WTF is up with so many of these August birthdays!!!! Fuck, was everyone just getting crazy BUSY in November!!!! What's going on in the DC universe that is making November of all months the HORNY MONTH????!!!!)

(Mini update ((8/18/23)): Well, I just found out that apparently June 27th 2023 is also a highly debated birth date for Terry. As is August 10 2023/2024 and August 18 2023/2024. I even saw a mention of September 19 2023, but I don't know how credible that source actually is. I'm just putting it here because I'm losing my mind and I don't want someone to pop in and say I forgot it omfg I'm dying

I'm just ... why? Why is it so hard to just commit to one month and one date. I'm not even concerned about the exact year. Just commit to ONE, man.

Excuse me while I march over to DC HQ and burn the whole place to the ground iswtfg)

Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong on any of these. I have a massive headache now and am open to any suggestions or clarifications y'all have to offer.

Also, I'm going to fist fight Dick in a Denny's parking lot.

Update (8/17/23): So a mini post that I meant to use as a way to vent how insane Dick was making me somehow blew up way more than I ever expected it to, and now I feel obligated to clarify again that I am open to any corrections and additional info that anyone has to offer.

I'm saying this because I've noticed people reblogging this post for actual Batfam bday references and someone already pointed out I fucked up Tim's bday and now I feel bad for everyone who reblogged this post prior to that edit.

It's probably just the anxiety talking, but yeah I just wanted to put that out there.

Also justice for Stephanie Brown! She deserves to have her own special day and if I have to bully DC into giving her a canon birthday, then you bet your ass I fucking will.

(And to all of y'all who are encouraging Dick to keep running his side scam business, I just have this to say: There's an empty Denny's parking lot somewhere out there just waiting for you, too lol)

[nitrosplicer]

The bullying had started in earnest at the beginning of the 2023 school year, a few months after Oklahoma governor Kevin Stitt signed a bill that required public school students to use bathrooms that matched the sex listed on their birth certificates.

A few weeks ago, on 7 February, the bullying allegedly erupted in violence when Nex suffered severe head injuries during a “physical altercation” at Owasso High School, according to the Owasso Police Department.

Sue Benedict told The Independent she was called to the school that day to find Nex badly beaten with bruises over their face and eyes, and with scratches on the back of their head.

Nex told her that they and another transgender student at Owasso High School had been in a fight with three older girls in a girls bathroom. Nex was knocked to the ground during the fight and hit their head on the floor, according to their mother.

Ms Benedict said she was furious that the school had failed to call an ambulance or the police. She said the school then informed her Nex was being suspended for two weeks.

She took Nex to the Bailey Medical Center in Owasso for treatment. They spoke to a police school resource officer at the medical facility and were discharged. That night, Nex went to bed with a sore head and eventually fell asleep while listening to music, Ms Benedict said.

On 8 February, Nex was getting ready to go to Tulsa with Ms Benedict for an appointment when they collapsed in the family living room. Ms Benedict called an ambulance, and EMT officers arrived to find Nex had stopped breathing. Nex was declared dead that evening in hospital.

[matan4il]

Daily update post:

If you remember the Bibas family, they were all kidnapped to Gaza on Oct 7, the father Yarden who left their house first, to protect his family, and then the mother Shiri, 4 years old Ariel, and the baby, 9 months old Kfir.

It is now confirmed that they were not kidnapped by Hamas, but rather by one of 26 terrorist organizations in Gaza, each one so small that they're usually referred to as terrorist factions, rather than terrorist organization. This one specifically has adopted a pattern of always cooperating with one of the bigger terrorist organizations (like Hamas or Palestinian Islamic Jihad), so we can assume that's what they did on Oct 7 as well. The first 45 seconds or so from the following vid is what it looked like when Shiri, Ariel and Kfir were being kidnapped, you can see how terrified she is...

Below is new CCTV footage that the IDF has uncovered from a street in Khan Younis, so now we know which city in Gaza the three (Shiri, Ariel and Kfir) were kidnapped to. Shiri is seen barefoot, Ariel's head is sort of visible, Kfir isn't, but it's assumed he's under the blanket, and Shiri holding him close to her body. Because this footage is from Oct 2023, there's so much we still don't know. Are they still there? What's their current state? Nobody knows, but the IDF spokesman has confirmed that there is grave concern for their lives.

Yesterday, a Hezbollah attack drone crashed into Arbel, the mountain on which Tiberias (one of the 4 holy cities in Judaism) is built. For some reason, the siren didn't go off. The drone crashed not too far from a kindergarten, but thankfully no one was hurt. In response, Israel has struck Hezbollah's weapon warehouses in Lebanon. To the best of my knowledge, they're still checking why the siren warning failed, and which country was the drone launched from, Lebanon, Syria or Iraq.

A French report says that the terror tunnels Hezbollah has been digging for years on Israel's northern border are more complex and dangerous than the system Hamas has dug under Gaza. That's what Israeli soldiers will have to tackle if the northern front goes to a full scale war. The terror tunnels Hamas has dug since 2007 under Gaza are so much more developed, extensive, complex and dangerous than Israel has realized, and the IDF has had to develop new ways of fighting in and around them, which we did not have when the war in Gaza started. Hamas' terror tunnels were estimated to be bigger than the London Tube (underground train system) back in Dec 2023, and there have been more tunnels located since. Just to put things in perspective, London's size is 1572 square kilometers (607 square miles), more than 4 times bigger than Gaza, at 363 square kilometers (140 square miles), and has a smaller underground tunnel system, according to what we knew about Gaza two months ago. But people want Israel to sit back, and let these threats to the lives of Israeli civilians continue to grow freely... Just a reminder, on Oct 7, the way the terrorists got to the border fence, to destroy the cameras there, without being spotted on the way was thanks to their terror tunnels, and those tunnels allow them to hold Israeli hostages captives, and it allows Hamas terrorists a place to hide and strike from, and it's where some Israeli hostages were murdered.

Today in our corner, "Suuuure, it's anti-Zionism, not antisemitism, but somehow it keeps targeting Jews and Jewish identity," we got two stories from the UK. One is of a Jewish family sending their baby girl's birth certificate to issue her a passport got the document back torn and defaced, with the word "Israel" under "father's place of birth" scribbled over.

The second story is of how the Amy Winehouse statue, which has stood in Camden Market for essentially 10 years, has also been defaced, specifically the Star of David was covered with a Palestinian flag sticker.

This is Elyakim Libman.

On Oct 7, he worked at the Nova music festival as a guard. Survivors of the massacre there say he helped save quite a few people. At a certain point, he went back to retrieve the body of a murdered young woman, so it wouldn't be taken hostage by the terrorists, and that's when he ended up being kidnapped himself. He's been in Gaza for over 4 months, including during his birthday. The other day, he became an uncle. He was supposed to be his nephew's godfather, but didn't get to. His family said explicitly they want no terrorists to be released in order to free him, and that if Elyakim could weigh in, he would say the same.

(for all of my updates and ask replies regarding Israel, click here)

[pigeonpeach]

Be my muse

Chiori x fem oni reader

Summary: Chiori is trying to court her big oni friend but they’re too insecure to realize it.

A/n: I’ll be doing more fem oni x character series simply because its fun. But if there’s a certain character you’d like then let me know

“Hmm… maybe this blue would match your horns better.” Chiori, the renowned stylist in Inazuma had you stood on a pedestal standing straight as she threw at you a variety of kimonos and yukatas to wear. As a blue oni you weren’t accustomed to human society to well. Fashion isn’t really a big deal to Oni kind.. like at all… in fact most oni’s only wear thick and concealing garments in the winter. Most walk around with their chests exposed. As a blue oni you were also used to the scrutiny that you faced. Being considered a monster, a demon. All sorts of names.

Yet when you ran into Chiori one day while you were collecting lavender melons she seemed not to even consider you any different to herself. Even if you did tower over her, she showed zero fear. You couldn’t help but admire her as she would visit your hut in the wilderness on Narukami Island frequently. She was curious about your culture and your family but also your style. Turns out she HATED your pratical and unfashionable wardrobe and sought to make something better. According to her it is a crime that you decorate yourself with such hideous clothes. You foolishly challenged her to make something better than.

That’s thing about Chiori, she loves a challenge. Chiori loves to go outside the normal kimono patterns and flowing fabrics. She loves to experiment and draw inspiration from all over teyvat. So when you challenged her to make a outfit suited both for the life of a mercenary and a oni that still fits her stands of beautiful she saw a golden opportunity. You didn’t even have to pay a cent, but you did become her mannequin for the next few months.

“Look, Chiori I didn’t think you would take that joke so seriously.” You said as she placed yet another mock up on you. “I’m worried… shouldn’t you be making prettier dresses for your store?”

“You know its not like I’m wasting time. I’m still balancing my normal workload. Infact this is good because the more variety I can have the more attention I’ll bring.” She responds, not even looking up as she sews a piece to the slev

“I don’t think people look at mercenaries and wonder where they got their clothes.”

“They would if more mercenaries didn’t dress so hideously.” She remarks.

“Well..-“

“Don’t give me that practicality argument I’ve hear it all before. I’ve offered you a job as my assistant to which is significantly less dangerous.”

“My job isn’t that dangerous. I can handle the treasure hoarders and hilichurls with ease.”

“I don’t want you too though.” She says, you sense something different with her tone as she stitches a hole she spotted shut. Her hands moving the string as a spider weaves its web. It appears you’re too entangled in her strings to leave so easily now.

“I-I appreciate that.” You say. “But being your assistant would be difficult. I can’t travel with you..” you frown as you remember how she mentioned how she wanted to leave inazuma. You cannot however, being a Oni you were far removed from society especially In it’s paperwork. You have no travel papers or birth certificate because you born in a clan of Onis who saw no reason for such documents, your birth wasn’t officially registered with the Inazuma government as many others were. Which means you can’t legally travel outside of Inazuma. That’s what the lady in Ritou said at least.

“I’d stay if you wanted me too.” She said, her hands stopped their work as she looked up at you with a look that made you melt. “You’re beautiful you know, beyond your pretty face and soft hair… you’re far from what they say about you. You’re not a brute, you’re not even cruel, you have the biggest heart I’ve seen.” You can’t help but blush. She’s rarely as sweet as she is now.

“I don’t want to hold you back. You deserve to see the world, and I don’t want you to be stuck here.”

“If you could… would you go with me?” She asks. You pause. Leaving Inazuma would be a privilege. You only heard tales of the other nations and what it was like. You only saw a few trinkets from the other nations. What would it be like to feel the wind in Mondstadt, or to go swimming in Fontaine, supposedly you could breathe underwater. You’ve heard endless praise of the dishes in Liyue from the merchants you helped to escort. You even got to try one and you found they weren’t exaggerating. Perhaps you just never allowed yourself to dream of actually going there because you doubted that would ever be real.

“I would love to.” You say. “To explore the world with you would be a pleasure.”

Silence falls between you as you tense up. Did that freak her out? You weren’t sure if she was into you or not. Oni customs are quite different. You had read about human customs sure but you still couldn’t tell. She pulls away gesturing for you to spin around. You do.

“That Lady in Ritou.. she’s the one who told you that you couldn’t leave right?” She asked. You felt concerned, It wasn’t unlike Chiori to be a bit vindictive if she felt upset at someone.

“Yes, what did you do to her?”

“Well I had a word with her, and I found out she was full of it. You can easily file for a birth certificate as long as your parents come with you to testify its correct. It just costs a bit of mora.” She says going back to sewing.

“Yes I’m aware of that too. Its why I started my Mercenary career.”

“I could pay for it… save your money for the ticket out of here. Those government officals love to overcharge. Someone like you seems easy to fool. You’re too kind to them.”

“To be fair I have to be. If I’m even slightly mean or angry they act like I’m going on a rampage. My behaviors don’t just affect how they perceive me, but my entire species. I have to be calm otherwise they won’t even give me a chance.” You lament.

“I’ll be mean then, you know I have a bite to me. They can’t say anything if its me pushing on your behalf.” She says with a mischievous smile.

“But it could ruin your reputation.” You say

“With who? I could care less what they think of me. Those kind of people aren’t worth a cent of my time anyways.” She say’s confidently. “People don’t ask. Fashion designer to be their friend they ask a fashion designer to make them look good infront of their friends.” You smile as she again shuts down your worries about her. You’re not used to this. You’re used to fighting and arguing just to prove you have heart. You’re used to beans being tossed and always having to give a second chance when they realize they were wrong. You try to be understanding, you try to be otherwise you’ll be seen as unreasonable. But Chiori isn’t like that. She once kicked out a customer because they screamed at you throwing beans when you were just bringing her textiles in. She yelled at how disrespectful they were to her staff and that they wouldn’t ever be welcomed in her shop.

“Hey. Stop overthinking.” She smacked your face guiding you to look down. In your thoughts she moved to your front to start tying your custom obi.

“I’m not overthinking this time actually… i was just thinking about something.”

“If anyone in the outside world is threatened by you I’ll correct their assumptions. You really need to let me help you here.”

“Actually… i was just thinking about you…” you say, her eyes widen slightly, a rare sight as her confident frown is replaced with confusion. “You… thank you Chiori… I-I’m just..not used to someone like yourself…” you smile as she shakes her head briefly before regaining her composure.

“Its really not that big of a deal. Now, tell me.. did I surpass your expectations?” She says moving out of the way so you can see your new outfit in the mirror. You smile, not because its the most beautiful you’ve ever felt for a woman your size, but because she looks at you like you are one. Your confidence is boosted by the clear pride she exhibits in it.

“Even better than I could’ve imagined.” You say. She raises her head in pride.

“Well good, I can get started on the others now.”

“Wait what?”

“Well, you don’t expect to travel teyvat with only one fancy garment do you?”

[ramblers-lets-get-ramblin]

White Christmas- Dieter Bravo x f!reader- a 12 Days of Pedro Story

Main Masterlist | Dieter Bravo Masterlist | 12 Days of Pedro Masterlist

Prompt: holiday getaway

Summary: You and Dieter decide to escape the push and pull of your families for the holiday.

Rating: E for EXPLICIT MDNI 18+

Word Count: 4.3k

Author's Note: this is my contribution to @hellishjoel 12 Days of Pedro!

I love this little trash panda and I am always itching to write more for him. shoutout to @wannab-urs and @catchallfangirl for beta reading for me! i love you both so much!

Warnings: oral sex f receiving, unprotected PIV, tummy riding, cumshot, cum eating, inappropriate use of a santa hat, bad family dynamics, face sitting, reader is comfortable wearing lingerie but is otherwise undescribed. I think that's everything. please let me know if I missed something and I will gladly add it!

Immersability: reader is able-bodied

“Goddamnit!” Dieter exclaims when his phone lights up, for what feels like the hundredth time today.

“Your mom again?” you ask. He snorts out a response just as his phone begins to ring again. He tosses the phone over his shoulder, not bothering to see where it lands. He presses the heel of his palms into his eyes and rubs them back and forth, letting out a deep, weary sigh.

“She just won’t fucking give up.” he groans. His mother had been calling non-stop for the last week. Wanting Dieter to come home for the holidays, for some reason. She had never been very interested in Dieter’s life. She had dropped him off at his grandmother’s house for a girls night out when he was six and hadn’t returned for seven years. By the time she came back, Dieter was in seventh grade, a foot taller and barely remembered her. She also had two kids in tow. She was home for a year that time, her longest stretch, before she inevitably left again. She tried to slide back into the role of mother as if she hadn’t pretended he didn’t exist for more than half of his life. She pretended to take an interest in his schooling, especially once she met the father of Dieter’s best friend. The part that hurt the most, though, was when she left again, she took his brother and sister with her, leaving Dieter with his abuelita once again. 

That woman had never had a kind word to say to Dieter in the eight years you’ve been together. According to him, she hadn’t said many before then, either. When Dieter moved to New York to pursue a career in theater, she told him not to get his hopes up. “Only the really special ones make it in that business, baby.” she said, patting his cheek condescendingly. When Abuelita died, she didn’t have a will, so Sofia got the house and Dieter got a warning that he wouldn’t be able to come running home with his tail tucked between his legs if his “little adventure” didn’t work out. It only got worse when he decided to move out to Los Angeles to pursue acting. She’s never believed in him, not for a second of his life. “You’re just like your father. Full of these hopes and dreams that’ll never amount to anything.” she had scoffed. Not that Dieter would know, he’d never met his father. He wasn’t listed on his birth certificate and Sofia only ever referred to him as “that man.” Of course, once Dieter’s career started taking off and his movies started generating buzz, she suddenly became a lot more interested in her son’s life again. 

She’s on her fourth or fifth husband these days, neither of you can ever remember. Her collection of various children who don’t know their eldest sibling, have no problem coming to him with their hands out, a trait they learned from their mother. He always gives in, because the alternative is having to listen to endless lectures about how ungrateful he is, and how much he “owes her for raising him.” That’s the only reason she wants him to come, really. So that he can lavish them with expensive gifts. The only reason Dieter even bothers to indulge every few years is because he is fiercely devoted to his nieces and nephews. The kids love to climb in his lap and wrestle on the ground. He plays football on the yard with the boys, and princesses with the girls. Whenever he comes home from a visit you can be sure it will be with a new manicure. He still sends gifts to the kids even when he doesn’t go home. This year, everyone is getting a new iPad. 

Not that your family is any less dysfunctional or treats you any better. Nice, boring house in a nice, boring suburb. Obligatory white picket and three-a-day Xanax addiction included. Your parents’ barely concealed disdain for each other and resentment towards the children who prevented them from living their dreams, didn’t stop them from pressuring you to join them for every family function. They have to keep up the perfect, All-American family image. The guilt-trip phone calls every holiday were even worse if you decided to spend the previous holiday with Dieter’s family. She’s been hounding you this week as well, wondering what the neighbors will think when they notice that another year has gone by without an appearance from yours truly. It always causes tension between you and Dieter, too. Neither of you wanting to put up with your families, but also not exactly thrilled to put up with the other’s family either. You don’t even bother to decorate the house for the season anymore. The push and pull from your respective families all but guaranteeing that neither of you will be home to enjoy it. 

When Dieter’s ringtone starts playing again, this time from the kitchen floor, you pick it up and take a look at the broken screen. Sofia, again. You roll your eyes and silence the call. You power it off and shove it into your pocket and walk to where Dieter stands leaning forward, his hands braced on the counter. You stand behind him and rest your head on his bare back, between his broad shoulders. You snake your hands under his arms and up his chest. You grip his pecs and press a soft kiss to his skin, between his shoulder blades. He shivers under your touch but you can feel the tension start to ease from his body.

An idea strikes you then. “Hey, Dee. I have an idea, baby.” He reaches up and rests his hands over your own.

“I’ve got a few ideas of my own, sweetheart.” You don’t need to see his face to see the lopsided smirk his mouth is turned up in, or the mischief glinting in his eyes.

“Not that, cabron ” you chuckle, planting another kiss to his skin. He releases your hands and turns to face you.

“What’s your big idea, baby?” he asks. He caresses your cheek with his thumb, his other fingers rest under your jaw, reaching towards the back of your neck.

“Let’s just get out of here. Let’s forget all the family drama and take a vacation.” He tilts his head at the suggestion and you can see his tongue poking the inside of his cheek as he mulls over the suggestion.

“Sounds like a plan. I just have one requirement.” You cock your eyebrow curiously.

“What’s that?” you ask.

“I want to go somewhere warm. Somewhere you can wear that teeny bikini I bought you this summer.” 

After much deliberation, you and Dieter ended up choosing Barbados for your Destination Christmas. Three thousand hours of sunshine annually, and thousands of miles away from either of your families. You decide two weeks should be long enough for the heat to die down. Why some people lose their minds around the holidays, you’ll never understand. You decide to do some pre vacation shopping, even though you don’t subscribe to the Norman Rockwell version of Christmas, you still live in America. The consumerism and materialism capital of the world. So you still need to find a present for Dee. But what do you buy for the man who can afford anything he wants? The man whose lack of impulse control ensures that he does? Something in the window of a store catches your eye and you step into the boutique. Twenty minutes and one swipe of Dee’s credit card later, you and your little black bag head for the record store. You find the perfect gift for him there. A vintage t-shirt of one of his favorite bands, The Replacements. From their 1990 tour at the Palladium, right before Paul Westerberg left the band for good. 

Thankfully you get home from your shopping trip before Dee gets home from his. You take the time to carefully wrap the shirt and stuff it to the bottom of your suitcase, next to your other purchase. You quickly shove your clothes on top, hiding the surprises, just as you hear Dee come in the front door. When he appears in the bedroom he walks straight to your dresser and opens the top drawer. You huff out a laugh when he dangles the tiny black triangles connected by thin string in front of your face.

“You forgot something, baby.” he says with a sly smile. You snatch the bikini from his grasp and drop it on top of the rest of your clothes.

“You should really start packing, Dee. Our flight is early.” you tell him. He lands a swat on your ass before he walks to the closet and digs out his own suitcase. 

He groans in your ear when the alarm goes off at 3:30 the next morning, his naked body pressed against yours. “Why did you have to book such an early flight, my love?” He tightens his arms around you when you move to rise from the bed.

“Dee, we have to go!” you squeal with laughter as he gently kisses the back of your neck. “Our flight is at 6:00. There’s a six hour layover in New York. Come on, lazy bones, get up.” you try once more to wrench yourself free from his grasp, but he just holds you even tighter.

“Gimme a kiss, first.” he whines. You turn in his arms and slot your lips between his. He slides his tongue into your mouth and you can feel his cock twitch against your bare thigh. You feel the heat emanating from your core at the mere thought of him sliding it inside of you. Lazy, sleepy morning sex is a fan favorite in your house. But you have a flight to catch.

“Come on, big boy. There’ll be plenty of time for all this once we get to the resort.’ you assure him. You give him a smack on the ass and push him out of the bed. 

Fifteen hours and two flights later, you finally arrive in Bridgetown. It’s the middle of the night so you have no trouble getting a taxi. They are all parked in a line outside the terminal. Dee falls asleep on the twenty minute ride to the resort, but you stay awake, watching the ocean whiz by. The salt from the sea permeates the air, even through the windows of the taxi. Even in your exhausted state, you already feel all the stress from the holiday season sleeping away from you. All the pressure to be with people you don’t really like, who don’t really like you. Just you and your guy, on a beach for two weeks. Toes in the sand, drinks in your hand. Nothing to worry about except what restaurant to go to, what shop to hit up. You gently nudge Dieter awake when you arrive at the resort. The taxi driver brings all of your bags into the lobby of the hotel and Dieter pulls a hundred dollar bill out of his wallet.

“Thanks, man. Drive safe.” he says to the man, still wiping the sleep from his eyes. You’d think for someone who travels so often he’d be more used to this. Sometimes, he reminds you of a fully grown toddler. While you give the man at the desk all of your check in information, a bellhop loads all of your luggage onto a gold rolling cart. And by ‘all of your luggage’ you mean your one suitcase and carry on, and Dieter’s three suitcases and two duffel bags. How this man could pack so much truly baffles you. All he ever wears is pajamas, or nothing. It makes you wonder what else he might be hiding in those bags. Maybe he did a little Christmas shopping of his own, you think. Once you get settled into your penthouse suite you send the obligatory “we’ve arrived safely texts. Then you turn off both of your phones and slip into bed. Dieter falls asleep immediately, snuggled into your side. His soft snores lull you to sleep after only a few minutes. 

You and Dieter spend the next seven days staying up late, sleeping in and having the laziest hungover sex anyone ever had. You spend your days on the beach, laying in the sun. Dieter naps and you read. Your evenings are spent at a different restaurant every night. None of the bullshit the resort serves. If you wanted to eat chicken parmesan you could have just stayed home. You ask the locals what their favorite restaurants are and their favorite dishes. You eat fish cakes, chicken feet, guava cheese and salt bread. You indulge in all of the local delicacies. Then, you spend a few hours at the resort bar, knocking back drink after drink. You stumble into your room and eat junk food and watch shitty horror movies. You talk for hours, content to do nothing more than just be together. Every other day you turn your phones on for 15 minutes. You respond to texts and Dieter returns calls and emails from his agent and his publicist. Then, they go right back off and are stuffed into the drawer of your bedside table. You can’t remember the last time either of you were this unplugged from the world. You wonder what it’ll be like when you have to go back to your real life. When Dee has to go back to his rigorous filming schedule and you have to return to your own work. You don’t want to waste a single second of this uninterrupted time with him. 

When Christmas day rolls around, you and Dieter opt to stay in your room the whole day. Most shops and restaurants were closed for the day anyway. You wake late in the afternoon and decide to take a shower while Dee is still sleeping. You peek over at him before you dig your surprise for him out of its hiding place in your suitcase. You slip quietly into the bathroom and turn the shower as hot as it will go. You take your time in the shower, carefully washing your hair, slowly soaping your whole body. When you step out of the shower you pause and listen, trying to figure out if Dieter is awake. When you hear nothing, you continue with your post shower ritual. You grab two of the resort towels off of the rack, probably the fluffiest towels you’ve ever felt, and wrap one around your body and the other around your head. You move to the vanity where your toiletry bag sits and grab your moisturizer. You apply a thin layer and while it soaks in, you finally open the little black bag you had bought on your shopping trip. You remove the barely there panties, red with a little white trimmed skirt. It came with a matching cut out bra, if it could be called that. It took you three tries to get the red satin triangles positioned just right. Finally, you pull out the cherry on top, so to speak. Pasties with red satin bows. Once you’ve wrapped yourself in the expensive lingerie, you tie the terry cloth robe tightly around your waist, lest the surprise be ruined. You give yourself a final once over in the mirror and pull the door open. 

Dieter is awake. He’s sitting against the headboard with his arms folded behind his head. Seems like he had a similar idea as yours. He cock stands proudly at attention, and it's wearing a little Santa hat. A noise of surprise escapes your mouth and you can tell by the look on Dee’s face, he got the response he was hoping for.

“Merry Christmas, baby.” he drawls, voice still gravelly from sleep.

“Funny,” you say, “I got a present for you to unwrap, too.” Dieter raises an eyebrow in curious interest.

“Oh yeah?” he asks.

“Why don’t you come over here and let me open you up?” He scoots down to the edge of the bed and spreads his legs wide. You saunter over to him, letting the tension build between you, keeping your hand tight over the knot of your robe. Once you’re standing between his thighs, he grips both of your hands in one of his large ones. He presses a soft kiss to them and drops them down at your side. He unties the knot at your waist and lets your robe fall open. His breath hitches in his throat when the terry cloth falls down your shoulders, offering him a peek of your exposed skin. He reaches up and shoves the fabric the rest of the way off. “Holy shit, baby. Is all this for me?” he asks, trailing a finger down the center of your chest, between the swell of your breasts. He rests his head against the softness of your stomach, his breath causing your body to light up with desire. You thread your fingers through the curls at the crown of his head and pull him closer still. “Merry Christmas to me.” he whispers, lightly licking just under your belly button. A shiver courses through your veins and you give his hair a slight tug. He moans against you at the sensation and reaches up to cup your ass. He spreads your cheeks apart and drags one of his fingers between them, until it comes to rest at your clothed core. The fabric is already wet and warm with your desire. 

Dieter slips his finger under your panties and swipes it through your folds. He gently nips at the same spot he was just licking. “Fuck, Dee.” you groan out into the air, the sound bouncing off the high ceilings right back into your ears. Dieter growls against your skin and removes his hand from your panties.

“Get over here.” he says wickedly and pulls you into his lap. You wrap your legs around his waist and start to settle in. “Nuh-huh.” he protests. He lays back on the bed and grips your ass tightly. When he pulls you forward onto his belly, you figure out what he’s after. But before you give in, you decide to take something you want from him first. You plant your hands on his chest and your clothed cunt on the soft swell of his tummy. “What are you up to?” he asks, a wicked gleam in his eyes.

“This,” you say as you grind down on him, “is my favorite part of your body.” You can feel his happy trail through your soaked panties, the coarse hair there providing you with the friction you need so badly. His hands move to your hips and he pulls you even further onto his stomach. You work your hips up and down, back and forth. You can feel the soft trim on his Santa hat bobbing against your ass. You can see the muscles of his throat work as he swallows. His jaw tenses and he moans loudly.

“Fuck yes, baby. Use me, mama . Take what you need.” he urges. Seeing how turned on he is by this sends you over the edge.

“Dee,” you pant. “I’m so close.” He stills your hips and when you protest, he responds ,

“On my mouth, baby. I need it. Need to taste you.” he practically begs. You slide your panties down, lifting one leg at a time until you can slip them off. You shuffle up the bed on your knees, dragging your bare, dripping pussy across his abdomen and chest. You hover over his face and he wraps his arms around your thighs. He pulls you down to his mouth, the scruff on his cheeks scrapes the inside of your thighs, but you relish the burn. He flicks the tip of his tongue lightly, but quickly, across your clit. The motion turns your bones into jelly and you fall forward, catching yourself on the mattress. You’re already so worked up that it only takes a few expert swipes of his tongue before you are falling apart all over him. He pulls you even tighter to his mouth as he works you through with his tongue. 

Once the aftershocks have passed, Dieter lifts you from his mouth and wiggles out from under you. He rises from the bed and stands at the foot of it. You are still on your knees with your hands planted on the mattress. Dee grips your hips and pulls you backwards towards him. You let out a yelp in surprise and he chuckles. “I can’t wait anymore, baby. I need to be inside you right fucking now.” he says, removing one hand. You see something fly over your head. The miniature Santa hat lands on the pillow in front of you. “Ready for me?” he asks. You barely begin to nod as you feel him press the head of his cock against your warm, wet cunt.

“ Fuck , Dee. Yes, papi .” you reply. He enters you slowly, but steadily, until your still sensitive walls fully engulf him. He lets out a low hiss when his hips meet the soft curves off your ass. Your hands fist the sheets when he starts thrusting. He pulls out of you nearly all the way, leaving just the tip inside of you, and buries himself to the hilt with every stroke. He fills you up completely every time, completely wrecking you. You wouldn't be surprised to get a noise complaint from resort staff with the way you scream for him. The animalistic growls he makes reverberate in your ears, and soon his pace begins to falter. He pumps once, twice, three times before he quickly pulls out of you. The front half of your body falls flat on the bed, your ass still sticking up. You feel the warm spurts of his come hit the cheeks of your ass. He grunts as he strokes himself and paints your skin with his spend. When he’s finished, he admires his handiwork.

“Looks like we ended up with a white Christmas after all, huh?” he laughs. You groan at his idiotic, but typically Dieter remark and lower your legs to the floor. You stand and try to hurry into the bathroom to clean up but Dieter stops you, slipping his tongue into your mouth, tangling it with your own. He grabs the meat of your ass, not caring that it's still sticky with his come. When he releases your mouth, he brings his fingers to it. His eyes light up when you take two fingers into your mouth, down to the knuckle, and suck them clean. You wink at him and walk into the bathroom, feeling his eyes on you every second of the way.  

Once you’ve cleaned yourself up, you remove the expensive lingerie and put on your favorite pair of leggings and one of Dieter’s t-shirts. Dee has dressed himself as well, kinda, he never leaves home without his ratty, sage green bathrobe. He’s sitting on the suite’s couch, scrolling Netflix for something to watch. You pause to rifle through your suitcase, pulling out the black plastic bag from the record store. You stuff it in your armpit and join him on the couch. Dieter pulls you in close to his cheat and kisses you on the forehead. “Thank you for my present. You looked so fucking hot like that.” he eyes you up and down. “You always look so sexy.”

You pull the bag out from under your arm. “I did get you a real present, ya know?” you shove the bag into his hands. His face lights up before he even opens the bag. When he pulls the shirt out and shakes the wrinkles from it, tears spring to the corners of his eyes.

“You remembered.” he whispers. Dieter had mentioned the show to you on your first date.

“If you could go back to any point in your life and relive it, when would it be?” you had asked.

“The last time I saw The Replacements live.” he responded with no hesitation. “I’d go back and watch it sober, revel in the finality of the moment instead of being too fucked up to even remember it the next day.” he slips his arms out of his robe and pulls the shirt on over his head. He lands a soft, but deep, kiss on your lips. “I love it, mamita. ” he says. His hand disappears into the comically large pocket of his robe. “I got a little something here for you, too.” he says. He opens his hand and a small velvet box rests in the palm. Your eyes flicker from his to the box, and back again.

“Dee, what is this?” you ask. You and Dieter had decided years ago that you didn’t need to get married. Nothing about a wedding or a marriage certificate would add anything to what you already share together. With Dieter’s notoriety, any ceremony you had would be a dog and pony show, a media zoo. He pushes the box into your hand and you open it. There’s a small gold, heart shaped charm inside. It matches the others on the anklet Dieter got you for your third anniversary. There’s a capital “D” in script font on one side. You roll your eyes when you turn it over and get a look at the other side. Engraved in the gold is an eggplant emoji.

“Merry Christmas, baby.” he says. You close the box and set it on the coffee table. You snuggle up under his armpit and he tightens his arm around your shoulder.

“Thank you, Dee. I love it.” you say, snatching the remote from his hand. You scroll through a few titles before finally settling on one.

“Scandal again?” Dieter pouts. You ignore him and press play. Your time here in your perfect little bubble is running out. Soon enough you’ll be back to L.A. and Dieter will be off to Germany for his new movie. You plan on soaking up every second of bliss you can get out this vacation. 

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[redditreceipts]

https://www.tumblr.com/rickmctumbleface/743164057237012480?source=share

🤨

so this seems very weird, especially because there is no source provided. but I've still been recovering from a cold, so I had some time on my hands and searched with Google's reverse image search feature what the source of this weird ass graphic could be

I clicked through several posts that all gave 0 sources, until I finally found a lonesome twitter account that linked an instagram account

deep in the comments of that instagram post, I was finally able to find a source! the graphic was based on this other graphic:

so this person marked the different states based on their own criteria:

for example, a state gets marked as high-risk if you can't change your birth certificate, and you're forced to out yourself when you have to show your birth certificate. and I am not from the United States, but according to what I found, you only have to show your birth certificate at occasions like getting a social security card or getting your citizenship. so like maybe five times in your life?

also, I'm sorry to talk about looks on here, but for many trans people, they won't be outed only if they show their birth certificate 😬 Erin Reed, the creator of this map, is certainly not a candidate to go stealth until they ask for a birth certificate

another point of contention for Erin was states banning "80 percent" of care. that made me take notice, because I believe that every adult should be able to do with their bodies what they want and part of that can be medical transition. So I clicked on the link that Erin kindly provided, and looked at what these horrible restrictions look like

okay, so these unimaginable horrors limiting trans healthcare are:

you have to sign an informed consent form

a physician has to oversee your health care

you have to see that doctor in person

the doctor can say that he doesn't think transitioning is the best option for you

What??? That's the "80 percent restriction" that the map was talking about??? wtf? like, I don't know about American healthcare, but how the fuck was it administered before? did they just give you the drugs without any doctor overseeing them?

Idk maybe I'm not seeing something here but this entire map just seems so weird to me. Like, you are allowed to go to these places. Some of the policies are certainly overdone, but they are acting as if they would be literally killed or harmed if they went into any of these States. I guess I have to agree on the "getting into prison if you use them wrong bathroom" one, because that really does seem to a bit much, but the rest? It's literally just fearmongering.

[jackdaw-and-hattrick]

Stand at the Edge

Prologue- Next

Ao3

Damian was irritated. This was not uncommon, surrounded as he was by idiots, but today especially he was, as Todd would so eloquently put it, pissed. This was because, for reasons utterly unknown, Greyson had gone insane, obsessively cleaning the spotless mansion (until Pennyworth ordered him to stop) and incessantly bothering him about his appearance, all because of an interrogation. Why Father had decided to hold this particular interrogation within the Manor itself was yet another source of Damien’s irritation. Apparently, the suspect’s emotional involvement with Todd justified the clear risk posed by allowing this stranger into their home, despite the fact that all background checks and past interviews showed him to be a clear and dangerous unknown. If anything, Todd’s involvement with the suspect only increased the likelihood of this “Danny Nightengale” being a danger to the family. Damian did not believe that Todd was an irrational madman in constant need of supervision Father seemed to think he was, but he did not pretend the man did not pose a possible threat. There was also the possibility that Nightengale recognized how deeply compromised Farther was when it came to Todd and was using him to gain access to the family, be it as the Bats or the Waynes. If that was the case, then Damien was sure Father would not mind granting a temporary reprieval of the No-kill rule. For the family’s safety, that is. Not because he cared about Todd or any of his other siblings or their feelings, thank you.

The main area of concern surrounding Nightengale was not what they had learned, but what they hadn't. So far, he had avoided all interviews with concerning success. Furthermore, no family member had actually managed to get a photo of him. Attempts to look him up showed only that he was a student at Gotham University studying Astrophysics and Aerospace engineering, that he had a sister named Jazmine who worked as a counselor within Arkem, which was concerning within it's own right, and that he had lived with said sister until moving in with Todd three months ago. Footwork provided a few more details, such as that he worked at the Iceberg Lounge as part of the band playing the violin and that he seemed to have a number of pet birds, specifically ravens, though these birds seemed to come and go as they pleased. Neighbors reported that he was pleasant enough, though there were a number of noise complaints regarding both the birds and his apparent activity as an engineer. What was truly concerning was the total informational whiteout predating his arrival in Gotham. The transcript he had used to get into university was a forgery, as was his social security number, birth certificate, and driver's license. He had no social media presence of any sort and there was no one they could talk to who had any idea where he was from. The same went for his sister, they were both complete blanks. What was most interesting, at least according to Drake, was that the photo used on the fake driver's license looked to have been doctored, as if someone had taken an old photo and artificially aged it. None of them could think of a reason someone would need to do that.

“I still do not understand why we are bringing Todd and Nightengale here.”

Damien said, doing his best to tie his tie himself with mediocre success.

“Because,” Bruce explained, stepping in to help and rescue the tie from Damien’s increasingly frustrated attempts, “he is dating Jason, and as his family, we have every reason to want to meet him.”

Damien raised a brow. That seemed unusually irrational of Father. Perhaps the presence of Todd in the equation was interfering more than he had expected.

“Given how slippery he has proven in the past,” he continued “this is our best opportunity to engage him while minimizing both his suspicion and his likelihood to run. Furthermore, he is far more likely to be forthcoming than he would be if operating on his own turf. This gives us the upper hand more than if we attempted to meet him elsewhere.”

That was better. If there was one thing Damien appreciated about Father, it was his direct, analytical nature. Meanwhile, Greyson shouted something about needing to hide all of the chairs. Suddenly there was a knock at the front door, and a loud bang as Greyson tripped himself attempting to open it. Pennyworth, appearing suddenly at the door when Damian could have sworn he was in the kitchen, opened it before Greyson had a chance to right himself. Standing there was Todd and, assumedly, Nightengale. It suddenly occurred to Damian that he had never actually seen the man up close before. He was tall, with dark hair and brilliant blue eyes. He was thin as well, concerningly so, his joints sharp where the bones shone through. His skin was so pale, like freshly fallen snow or bleached bone. There was something terribly familiar about him, but so was probably any other pale man with black hair and blue eyes. As he grew closer, Damian noticed, snaking up Nightengale’s right arm and peaking up from the collar of his turtleneck, a Lichtenberg scar. Something in the back of his head stirred, but he couldn't think what it could possibly be. Greyson was shaking this man’s hand, offering some kind of greeting, but Damian couldn't hear it. Suddenly, Nightengale’s head snapped. Now he was looking right at Damian, his blue eyes boundless and staring as a grin stretched far wider across his face than should have been possible, wider even than the Joker and with teeth like a cat, sharp and predatory. He thought he maybe should have been frightened, though he wasn't sure why.

“Little Prince!”

Nightengale embraced Damian tightly, lifting him slightly off the ground. He wasn't sure how he had gotten so close so quickly. His skin was cold, but as comforting as an ice pack on an injury; the relief of a cold shower in the height of summer held in sharp and narrow arms. Something about this situation seemed wrong but he couldn't pin down just what it was.

“It's been so long! Look how big you’ve gotten. Ancients, the last time I saw you, you were just a shade!”

Wait. That was it.

“What do you mean, ‘last time’”

Damian willed his muscles to tense, his hands to clench into fists but they remained stubbornly relaxed.

“Dami, little light, ya sitti, don't you remember me?”

Nightengale gently set Damian and for a second he was blinded as the man was wreathed in rings of light bright as the sun. When the light faded the man had... changed. The most obvious shift was his hair, once black and now so blindingly white that it made his face shadowy and difficult to see, as well as luminescent, Lazarus green eyes, the sclera black as night. Rather than the simple black turtle neck and slacks he had come in, he was now wearing a black hazmat suit with a white belt holding what looked like an old-fashioned radio and, oddly, a thermos. He had white gloves, though they became sharp and claw-like at the tips. There were other, more subtle changes, such as how his skin grew grey, like someone who had been dead for hours, and the faint glow of the fractal Lichtenburg just visible through the suit. Damian became aware suddenly of pressure that had been building in his ears and only just released.

“No.”

“Oh...” the Man, he was not Nightengale, seemed to deflate.

“No... I... It's not... You can not.”

Damien was faintly aware that he was not making sense, but seeing that this made two of them, he felt little need to correct it. Finally, enough of his brain cells managed to collide for him to form a sentence.

“What are you doing here?”

“Damien,” Father said, careful to insert himself between his son and whoever, whatever, was floating just slightly off the ground before them, “who is this? How do you know him?”

“His name is Phantom. When I was a child, I would make up stories about him and the strange land he ruled.”

Hearing his name, Phantom smiled a much smaller, more hesitant smile than his Joker-esque grin from before. He waved slightly. Meanwhile, Father looked as if he were about to have an aneurysm. Looking about, that seemed to be the consensus amongst the onlookers, albeit Todd who laughed. Hard.

Tag Cultists

@mur-ururu @krzys2000 @soren1830 @fisticuffsatapplebees @emergentpanda-blog @heirxofxtime

[coochiequeens]

Women's history just got richer

By Mindy Weisberger, CNN

More than 1,000 years ago, carvers in what is now Denmark set their chisels to rock to etch runestones — monuments to Viking leaders naming their deeds and achievements. Two groups of runestones mention a woman named Thyra, and new analysis of the carvings suggests that the runes on both sets of stones were inscribed by the same artisan and refer to the same woman: a Viking queen of considerable power.

Researchers from Denmark and Sweden used 3D scans to analyze carvings on the runestones, finding telltale clues that marked the individual style of the person who carved them. That carver’s repeated mention of Thyra’s name — a rare occurrence for Viking-era women — suggested that Thyra was a powerful sovereign who likely played a pivotal role in the birth of the Danish realm, the scientists reported Wednesday in the journal Antiquity.

“To learn more about the rune-carver and those named on the stone is fascinating,” said Dr. Katherine Cross, a lecturer at York St. John University in the UK who researches and teaches the history of early medieval northern Europe. She was not involved in the study.

“We can only understand early medieval sources once we can think about who made them and why,” Cross told CNN in an email.

One set of runes came from a pair of monuments known as the Jelling stones, erected in the town of Jelling around 965. The larger Jelling stone is often referred to as “Denmark’s birth certificate,” as it’s the first monument to name the land as its people pivoted to Christianity, according to the National Museum of Denmark in Copenhagen.

Both Jelling runestones also named a royal figure: Queen Thyra, mother of then-reigning King Harald Bluetooth. The smaller stone was raised in her honor by her husband (and Harald’s father) King Gorm, calling her “Denmark’s strength/salvation” (or “Denmark’s adornment,” depending on the translation, the researchers noted in the study). Harald commissioned the larger stone, to honor both of his royal parents.

In another set of four Viking-era monuments, known collectively as the Bække-Læborg group, two runestones mention a woman named Thyra. Those stones are associated with a carver named Ravnunge-Tue, but experts disagreed on whether that Thyra was Harald’s mother, said lead study author Dr. Lisbeth Imer, a curator and senior researcher at the National Museum of Denmark specializing in the study of runes and ancient inscriptions.

Before the new investigation, it was unknown who had carved the Jelling stones. Confirming that their carver was Ravnunge-Tue would strengthen the connection between the Jelling and Bække-Læborg runestones, Imer told CNN in an email.

“Then it is much more reasonable to suggest that it was in fact the same Thyra,” she said.

A question of style

Some details in ancient runestones that indicate a carver’s individual style are visible to a trained expert’s eye, such as the language or the basic shape of the runes. Other details are harder to detect, Imer said.

“What you cannot see with the naked eye is the carving technique,” she said.

To get a closer look at the carvings, the researchers took scans of the stones and created 3D digital models, then measured the runes’ grooves with a software tool that weighed variables such as angle, depth and cutting rhythm. Together, these variables can create a unique profile for a carver.

“Every rune carver develops his own motor skill and holds the tools in a certain angle, strikes with a certain strength,” Imer said. “The motor skill is individual and other individuals cannot copy that.”

When the researchers compared runes from Jelling 2 (the larger of the two Jelling stones) and the Læborg stone from the Bække-Læborg group, they found striking similarities, such as height of the runes, straightness of the main staves and length and placement of rune branches.

“In the Læborg and Jelling inscriptions you can follow the cutting rhythm of Ravnunge-Tue as one deep stroke of the chisel followed by two not so deep ones: DAK, dak-dak, DAK, dak-dak,” Imer said via email. “It is ALMOST like hearing the heartbeat of a person that lived so long ago.”

Jelling 1 was more eroded, so its markings were harder to analyze. But if the Læborg runestone was Ravnunge-Tue’s handiwork, Jelling 2 was likely his as well, Imer said. It would mean that the Queen Thyra mentioned twice in the Bække-Læborg group — on Læborg and on the stone Bække 1 — was the same person commemorated on the Jelling stones, the study authors concluded.

In recent years, archaeologists have revised prior interpretations of Viking warrior burials as exclusively male, finding that Viking women were fighters, too. The new findings add to the picture of influential Viking women holding prominent roles in statecraft as well as on the battlefield.

“This research highlights how Viking-Age women wielded power through political authority and patronage, not just violence,” Cross said.

What’s more, the fact that Thyra is mentioned on four runestones offers strong evidence of her importance, Imer added. Fewer than 10 runestones in Denmark from the pre-Christian era mention women at all — and four of those are of Queen Thyra.

“Runestones in Denmark were mostly erected in honour of men, but Thyra is commemorated on more runestones than any other person in Viking Age Denmark,” Imer said. “She must have held extreme power and social position.”

Mindy Weisberger is a science writer and media producer whose work has appeared in Live Science, Scientific American and How It Works magazine.

[female-malice]

I want lesbians to be the parents of their children without the government or anyone else trying to get in their way. But isn't a birth certificate more about biology? It would be important for health reasons to know who the biological relative to the baby is, same with the baby's biological sex. Unless I am completely misunderstanding what a birth certificate is and maybe it's more of a government thing than I thought? Now that I think about it, I don't know what a birth certificate for a baby born to a parent and a step parent would look like either.

You are completely misunderstanding what a birth certificate is. A birth certificate is a LEGAL document designating parental rights.

A paternity DNA test is a medical document that shows someone's genetic history.

A birth certificate is a legal document that a child will need every day of their life. A birth certificate designates who is legally responsible for a child's life.

IF YOU PUT A MAN'S NAME ON A LESBIAN FAMILY'S BIRTH CERTIFICATE, YOU ARE GIVING HIM PARENTAL RIGHTS.

Whoever told you birth certificates are about ~biological reality~ is a lesbophobe.

My brother's friend does not legally have a father. His mother did not give his biological father parental rights. She elected not to put his name on the birth certificate. She did not want her shitty ex-boyfriend to have any legal parental relationship with her son. That is her right as a woman.

"Gender critical feminists" want to take this right away from all women because they are blinded by their own lesbophobia.

Please read Letizia's essay more closely.

Don't just open the tab and leave it unread. Here, I'll give you a short section to read right now:

The facts of biology are suddenly forgotten once the so called "non traditional" family is composed of a man and a woman. No government in any country is removing non-biological fathers from birth certificates, even though the man in the birth certificate has no biological relation to the child. On the contrary, most countries have pretty straightforward laws about the recognition of non-biological fathers as long as the couple in question is heterosexual.

I live in a small Italian village, one of those places where secrets don’t exists and your problems are everyone’s problems. The happy nuclear family a few houses down the road couldn’t conceive a child naturally because the husband is sterile. Not the end of the world these days. The Italian law allows IVF to heterosexual couples. The happy nuclear family simply picked a sperm donor, and a beautiful girl was born, she has her mother’s eyes.

The father on the birth certificate is not the donor, however the happy nuclear family didn’t receive a letter from the Italian government telling the husband that he is not the father of his child. No, it only happened to lesbian families in Italy. 

So where is your truth now? Your biological reality. Aren't we here to protect children and fight for reality? According to you this man shouldn’t have legal rights on the child his wife birthed. Or does it work differently because their family is approved by the church? Oh but this is different, he has a wife, he is heterosexual, he could have been fertile! Well, I could have been born male. To quote every mamma on the peninsula: if my grandmother had wheels she would have been a bike.

[youremyheaven]

Is Angelina Jolie a Punarvasu Rising or a Pushya Rising?

Angelina Jolie's reported birth time is 9:09 am and is said to be a Pushya Rising, had she been born 10 minutes earlier, she would have Punarvasu Rising. Given that this is a very small window of time and highly likely for her birth to have taken place 10 minutes earlier (birth certificates often report a rough estimate not an accurate minute-by-minute statement) I am inclined to believe that she may indeed be a Punarvasu Rising.

According to Claire Nakti, on her post about the beauty and appearance of Punarvasu natives, she had remarked that due to Punarvasu's Jupiter influence, its natives often have really large features, especially the eyes and lips but also the chin and cheekbones.

L to R

Sharon Tate- Punarvasu Rising

Angelina Jolie

Lisa Bonet- Punarvasu Rising

All of them have a similar face shape, very prominent eyes and cheekbones and chin and large features overall.

The only feature of her appearance that can be attributed to Saturn influence (assuming she's Pushya Rising) is her bone structure. Still, if she were Punarvasu Rising then she'd have Ascendant conjunct Saturn so Saturn would affect her appearance anyway.

Angelina also has twin children, Knox & Vivienne who are Punarvasu Sun

Our children represent our karma and Angelina does have Saturn in Punarvasu in her birth chart

Since the constellation of Punarvasu features the twin stars Castor & Pollux (which are, interestingly the names she had picked out for them when she was pregnant with them), many famous twins tend to have Punarvasu placements and some famous Punarvasus tend to have twins

Mariah Carey, Punarvasu Moon with her fraternal twins, Moroccan and Munroe

The IG famous Clements twins (Ava & Leah) are Punarvasu Sun (conjunct Mercury)

Duality is an innate theme of Jupiter and many other Jupiter natives also have twins or are twins:

Scarlett and Hunter Johansson, Vishaka Moon

Lisa Marie Presley, Purvabhadrapada Moon with her twin daughters, Harper & Finley

Angelina's elder daughter, Shiloh is Rohini Sun & Moon (Angelina is Rohini Sun) and since the twins are Punarvasu Sun, I am inclined to believe that perhaps Angie is a Punarvasu Rising.

(please note that the only reason I am not mentioning her adopted children is that the birthdays of adopted children are often assumed/approximated since birth certificates or such data cannot always be obtained as they're abandoned as babies :((( but all in all, all of our children, biological or adopted, represent our karma)

Other than all this, the reason I am strongly inclined to believe Angelina is Jupiter-dominant is because of this video. In this video, Claire explains how Jupiter natives tend to have a drastic makeover or change in persona/image as they integrate their shadow and individuate. She placed a lot of emphasis on how these women "feminize" themselves (Jupiter is a masculine planet and often these women are kind of shabby or tomboyish or scrappy and then go through a journey where they embrace their "femininity" and get more attention as a result of it).

These are some images of Angelina from her teen years. She dropped out of high school at the age of 14 due to constant bullying and has talked about being unpopular in school. (the "invisible phase" of Jupiterean women)

Keep in mind that if she is Punarvasu Rising then it conjuncts her Saturn in Punarvasu, which means not only does she experience the expansiveness of Jupiter but she has to learn how to contain this boundlessness within the restrictive nature of Saturn. Saturn conjunct luminaries also give the native excellent bone structure 👀and difficult and turbulent life experiences that drive one to self-purification (Angelina turned to spirituality and humanitarian work in her mid-20s and has credited it with helping her turn her life around and find purpose and meaning).

Jupiter women go through most of their early lives being very unrefined, kind of scrappy if not tomboyish. They're very passionate and devote themselves to their hobbies and interests but they neglect themselves and don't really put effort into their self-presentation.

Angelina is 16yrs old in this interview and if you observe the way she talks, her body language etc, she's very awkward but more open, kind of saying whatever, she's more "free" in some sense because she's not poised or refined yet.

This is her at the age of 24 and she's outgrown her teenage awkwardness but she's still in her rebel era, she hasn't integrated her shadow yet

This is Angelina in the year 2003, she's 28 years old and you can see how she's become more feminine, more poised, more ladylike, there is a glow to her and she seems calmer and composed as opposed to the kind of frantic, restless energy of her older interviews. This is a year after she adopted her son Maddox in 2002. She has credited her time in Cambodia (she went there for the first time in 2000) leading up to the adoption of her son Maddox as having been instrumental to her transformation as seeing the aftermath of the Khmer Rouge opened her eyes to human suffering and she grew committed to humanitarian work and living her life more responsibly (she had previously struggled with heroin addiction and famously hired a hitman to kill her)

“I never thought I’d have children,” she said. “Having come from a broken home, you kind of accept that certain things feel like a fairy tale, and you just don’t look for them.”

“I knew once I committed to Maddox, I would never be self-destructive again.”

Punarvasu's deity Aditi is the mother of all Gods and is also the God of earth & harvest. Motherhood is a very significant experience for Punarvasu women. Goddess Aditi was mother to the 12 Adityas and vedic texts mention Punarvasu women as being "blessed with sons". Many famous Punarvasu women can be cited as examples, most notably, Miranda Kerr, Punarvasu Moon who has 4 boys, Gwen Stefani, Punarvasu Moon who has 3 boys, Shakira, Punarvasu Moon who has 2 boys.

Angelina has repeatedly credited her son Maddox for helping her become "a woman" and that she felt called to be his mother.

At what age did you feel the most at ease with your femininity?

"When I first became a mother, and now. That sense of ease grows and changes with each passing year and each stage in life. For me, it is about learning to accept yourself and accept what life brings."

Being a mother of 6 and a humanitarian is a huge part of her public image. She went from being a weird punk who wore vials of blood kissed her brother and did knife tricks on late-night shows to this very poised, refined, elegant woman.

She was this Hollywood eccentric widely considered a freakshow and in a couple of years she became one of the most admired women in the world. This emerged from the shadow to her light and became one whole integrated being. Punarvasu being "the return of the light".

Her fame rose to astronomical levels in the mid-2000s following her makeover and Angelina quickly became an A-list celebrity. Punarvasu and Jupiter in general test the natives so their lives are full of ups and downs until they find balance. Even though her father was an Oscar-winning actor, Angelina did not grow up with much money as her parents divorced when she was young and she was raised by her single mother (who wasn't rich or famous). She in fact started modelling as a teenager to support her mother. Then in her later life, she accumulated immense wealth and currently has a net worth of $120 million. (her birth nakshatra of Revati is also a wealth giving nak along with Punarvasu).

She underwent a drastic transformation and we saw her shed her darkness or emerge from her shadow into the light. This transformation also brought her immense attention and saw her rise in status. This is a uniquely Jupiterean journey. Especially with her Ascendant conjunct Saturn, her life was full of karmic trials, be it being of service to humanity, her many marriages, her 6 children, losing her mother to cancer, her own battles with health and all of this before she even turned 40 as Jupiter natives undergo many trials and tribulations when they're young.

Another feature of Punarvasu's return of the light theme is doing things better the second time around or having multiple chances to get it right. This often means multiple marriages (Miranda Kerr, Mariah Carey, Gwen Stefani etc come to mind rn) and Angie has been married thrice 👀

All of this leads me to believe that Angelina Jolie is a Punarvasu Rising and not a Pushya Rising.

[the-bad-batch-baroness]

Where's Mommy?

Wolffe x Lilith Sestri (OFC)

Part 2

Summary: Wolffe's wife suddenly dies, leaving him a single father in the middle of a war.

Pairing: Wolffe x Lilith Sestri (OFC)

Characters: Wolffe, Plo Koon, Cara (child OFC)

Tags & Warnings: heavy angst, mention of death, off-screen death, spousal death, grief, hurt/comfort

Word Count: 911

Author's Note: Well, I made it into a series based off of the feedback I got from the poll. I also gave Wolffe's daughter a name and updated the previous chapter to include it. Uh, forewarning, it gets worse before it gets better. We still have several parts of angst to get through before we ever start seeing glimpses of happiness, but it will happen eventually!

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"CC-3636?" a nurse called as she entered the waiting room carrying a data-pad.

"Yes, I'm CC-3636," Wolffe said and quickly wiped his face. He stood up from the bench and approached the nurse.

"I need you to fill out this form so we can alert the next of kin to claim the body," the nurse said.

Wolffe knit his brows together. "I am the next of kin. I'm her husband."

The nurse bit her lip. "I'm sorry, but according to current Republic statutes your marriage is invalid, which makes you a family-friend, not a next of kin."

"Friend?" Wolffe scoffed. "We live together. Have a child together. I'd say that's more than friends."

The nurse sighed. "Cohabitation and bearing a child does not constitute a legal binding marriage in the eyes of Republic law."

Wolffe's breath was stolen as he stared blankly at the nurse. She couldn't be serious. There was no way. They couldn't get a marriage license. It was impossible. He tried and it was futile. Every which way he attempted failed. He couldn't get around the fact that he wasn't a legal citizen. He didn't even have a legal name that could've been put on the marriage license. They had the ceremony, did everything else they were supposed to do, but no one would give them an official license.

"Speaking of which," the nurse added under her breath, as if her own words pained her to speak. "We'll also need to contact child services since Cara is now considered a legal orphan."

"Orphan?" Wolffe exclaimed. "But I'm her father!"

"Is your name on the birth certificate?" the nurse asked, as if she already knew the answer.

A lump formed in Wolffe's throat and he clenched his fist. "No… It's not. But my DNA… I'm still her biological father."

"I'm sorry," the nurse said. "But legally you aren't. She will be placed in a children's care facility pending a familial investigation, and if no family is found, she will be placed into foster care."

"You can't take my daughter!" Wolffe yelled. "I've already lost my wife tonight! And now you want to take my kid from me too? What is wrong with you people!"

The nurse was startled at Wolffe's emotional outburst.

"She needs me!" Wolffe continued as he raised his voice higher. "I'm all she has left!"

"Sir," the nurse said. "I'm so sorry, but there's nothing I can do. We're bound by the laws."

"I swear to the Maker if you lay a single hand on her I'll–"

"If I may," Plo interrupted. He carefully handed the sniffling child back to Wolffe, then ushered the nurse down the hallway. "Perhaps you and I can discuss the details of this form privately."

"Very well, Master Jedi," the nurse agreed and followed him.

Wolffe collapsed back onto the bench and pressed his daughter against his chest as tightly as he could, terrified that at any moment someone would walk through the med-center doors and rip her out of his arms. He'd never let them take her. He'd rather die than let them take her. She meant everything to him, and with his wife gone, Cara was the only piece of her he had left. He didn't think his night could go from bad to worse, but his nightmares were quickly becoming a reality.

Wolffe felt Cara squirm in his arms and he loosened his grip. She didn't say anything between her quiet sniffles, but settled herself onto his lap to get more comfortable. Her face was red and puffy from crying, and she looked exhausted. Wolffe pulled up the edge of his sleeve and wiped up the snot dripping down her face, brushed a piece of her black curly hair away, then let her settle comfortably against his chest. He tilted his head down and kissed the top of her head while he rocked her back and forth the best he could.

"It's going to be okay," Wolffe whispered into her hair. "I won't let anything happen to you."

After a few more minutes, Plo returned with the nurse. They exchanged a few more words that Wolffe couldn't hear, but the nurse was smiling, so he hoped it was good news. Maker knew he couldn't handle anything else going wrong. As Plo approached the bench, Wolffe felt a new knot forming in the pit of his stomach. As tired and emotionally drained as he was, he would find a way to protect his daughter, even if it went against all of his training and every GAR regulation.

"General?" Wolffe questioned as Plo approached him, his exhaustion seeping through his voice.

"I have taken legal custody of Cara," Plo said. "She will reside at the Jedi Temple for the time being, and your wife will receive proper funeral rights as well."

Wolffe leaned his head back against the wall and breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank the stars."

The fact that his general would take custody of his daughter, just to keep her from being taken away from him, touched Wolffe's heart deeply. The arrangement was still not ideal, but it was better than what he hoped for, considering the alternatives of foster care or next of kin. At least at the Jedi Temple, Cara would be primarily safe and cared for, and he could see her unrestricted by laws. It wouldn't be enough when he got deployed, but for right now, at this moment, it was more than enough.

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[itgetsbetterproject]

Some tangible Black queer history for you!

In case you needed any more proof that we've always been here - this amazing collection is courtesy of the Stonewall National Musuem and Archive!

Rafiki: The Journal of the Association of Black Gays, Vol. 1 #1 (Fall 1976)

"Rafiki was a quarterly publication from the Association of Black Gays (ABG), a Los Angeles, California gay activist group that organized through education, political engagement, and grassroots activism to improve the conditions for Los Angeles’s Black gays and lesbians.

According to the journal, the title Rafiki was chosen because it means “friend” in Swahili and “that’s what [ABG] hope to be for you.” This first issue includes an article on the history of ABG and the fact that Black gays and lesbians have been largely excluded from the political, social, and economic advances of the gay community.

Included in this issue are articles such as “Homosexuality in Tribal Africa” and “Disco Discontent” (an open letter to the owner of Studio One, Scott Forbes), as well as poetry by Steven Corbin and Frances Andrews, and book reviews. It even contains an ad for the famous Catch One Club owned by Jewel Williams, which is still operating today!"

I Am Your Sister: Black Women Organizing Across Sexualities by Audre Lorde (Kitchen Table: Women of Color Press, 1985; from the Freedom Organizing Series)

You can read this one here!

"This small twelve-page publication derives from a speech Audre Lorde gave at the Women’s Center of Medgar Evers College in New York City regarding the exclusion of Lesbians in the feminist movement and how Lorde’s identity as both a Black woman and lesbian are inextricably linked.

Primarily, heterosexism and homophobia are major issues Lorde states are “two grave barriers to organizing among Black women.” Lorde ends the essay with the statement: “I am a Black Lesbian, and I am your sister.”

Her emphasis on the duality of this identity stems from a 1960s poster that said “He’s not black, he’s my brother!,” which Lorde states infuriated her because “it implied that the two were mutually exclusive.”

Kitchen Table: Women of Color Press was founded by Barbara Smith—another Black Lesbian feminist—and Audre Lorde in 1980 to create a publishing apparatus for women of color who at the time did not have control over how they were published except through the white-dominated outlets."

Flawless! The Life & Times of T.B.D.J. AKA Tiffani Inc. AKA Mrs. … (Manuscript) by Tiffany Bowerman (July 2007, A&E Publishers)

This autobiographical manuscript traces the life of Tiffany Bowerman aka Tiffany B.D. Johnson (b. 1959), who states that she “was the first African-American Transsexual to have state issued birth certificate reissued [1990]… was the first to legally marry three different active duty military men… [and] first… to found their own Christian Denomination… The Agape-Ecumenical Christian Denomination.”

Further, she states “I have tried to put together something striking and original[,] a journey from childhood to self aware adult. A life that was and is with all regrets included.”

This manuscript is a preliminary copy of a rough draft, and contains various memoirs, photographs, legal documents, and ephemera.

Out in Black and White: A Directory of Publications By, About, For People of Afrikan Descent In-The-Life by the Broward County Library Outreach Services Department Exhibit/Programming Services with direction by Eric Jon Rawlins (January, 1996)

Out in Black and White is a directory of various serial publications (magazines, newsletters, journals, etc.) throughout the United States that are focused on the Black LGBTQ experience. According to the directory, “[t]his project was inspired by the atmosphere of strength, oneness and productivity created by the Million Man March [on October 16,] 1995.”

The Million Man March was a political demonstration that took place at the National Mall in Washington, D.C. with the purpose of encouraging involvement in the improvement of the conditions of African Americans. Eric Jon Rawlins was a Broward County, Florida librarian who at one time was also the second vice president of the NAACP Fort Lauderdale branch in the late 1980s.

Currently, the Eric Jon Rawlins Collection consisting of personal and professional papers, as well as his 6,000 vinyl record album collection, are housed at the African American Research Library and Cultural Center Special Collections in Broward County, FL.