#and how now we are in the perfect set up for them to develope for the better

[jays-platoon]

Love After Legacy- PJS (teaser)

PAIRING: Brother's Bestfriend! Jay x Fem! Reader

EST. Word Count: 12-16k

TAGS: non-idol, chaebols in Mexcio au! Jungwon's last name is park, Jake and Heeseung are very animated and a lot of the time show expression through emoticons!, fluff, smut (MDNI !!!!!!!!!!), a couple kys jokes

CW: vomiting, alcohol use, marking, protected sex, unprotected sex, choking, dry humping, virginity loss, marking, etc. more to come ;p

AN: This is our very first fanfic (and smut!), first teased nearly two years ago—thank you for your patience. College life kept us busy, but we finally felt now was the perfect time to share it, especially with the story set largely in Mexico. We wanted to celebrate the beauty of our motherland and push back against the way it’s been unfairly portrayed or treated—as if returning to it is a punishment. This is also our tribute to Enha, especially Jay, who deserves way more fic love. We hope you enjoy, and while shares are appreciated, please respect our work—no plagiarism. We poured our hearts into this. 💛Admin: ପଓ

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 Sixth grade, 1988, when two boys were brainstorming how they were going to be rich. James and Kwangho Park bonded over 3 things, their shared surname, their hardworking nature, and their strong desire to be beyond well- off in life. The two boys simultaneously spent their childhoods and early adulthood developing the resources to become founders of one of the largest hotel franchises as well as real estate companies worldwide. 

During this 15 year process, both men found wives who later gave birth to 2 children each. Park James fathered 2 amazing boys, Jay and Jungwon, while Park Kwangho had his beloved Sunghoon and treasured Y/N. Conveniently enough for the 4 children, age gaps amongst one another were practically nonexistent. The 2 older boys were both born in 2002 and the second pair in 2004.

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Sunghoon was a true momma’s boy since he would go on his figure skating trips with his mother, while Y/N was a daddy’s girl, she had been learning business tactics and the way of the office since she could remember. When Sunghoon was away, Y/N would spend all of her time with her dad or with her best friends, Jungwon and Jay. 

She was so much closer to Jungwon, not just because they were born months apart from each other but they were practically betrothed since the moment Y/N took her first breath in the fine month of May. James and Kwangho thought that they could be the perfect heirs to their legacy but didn’t push anything on them since they were only children. There was never an instance where in either of their minds they felt any form of romantic attraction to one another. She was just always side-by-side to Jungwon, metaphorically and literally speaking.

Their bonding was also fueled by her slight hesitancy toward Jay, it was nothing new, she just couldn’t help but always shy away from the charming young boy. This of course did not mean they were not friends though, who else would Y/N hang out with when Sunghoon was away and Jungwon was training in taekwondo?

Jay and Y/N spent a good chunk of their early childhood in one specific conference room, room 20C. Spending their time studying with tutors, then ignoring them, by the end of the day, they ended up playing stupid little games together instead of doing their assignments. Ultimately this resulted with their dads scolding them leaving Y/N as a crying mess with Jay comforting the poor sulking girl. In spite of all the scoldings and homework, room 20-Cube was their favorite place to be together. 

Although she was always with Jay, Jungwon was her extra set of limbs, the other pea in the pod, twin flame, ass crack to a fart, they befittingly clicked. They were the duo everyone wished they could have. Their siblings were nothing short of being the same way, it was like they were destined since birth to abide by the “bro-code”. Nothing could separate these four from each other or their duos. 

Due to Sunghoon frequently being abroad, he always felt extra protective of Y/N since he couldn’t always be there when she needed him. That’s part of the reason he loved Jay and Jungwon so much, they looked out for her when Sunghoon couldn’t.

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Sunghoon was a true momma’s boy since he would go on his figure skating trips with his mother, while Y/N was a daddy’s girl, she had been learning business tactics and the way of the office since she could remember. When Sunghoon was away, Y/N would spend all of her time with her dad or with her best friends, Jungwon and Jay. 

She was so much closer to Jungwon, not just because they were born months apart from each other but they were practically betrothed since the moment Y/N took her first breath in the fine month of May. James and Kwangho thought that they could be the perfect heirs to their legacy but didn’t push anything on them since they were only children. There was never an instance where in either of their minds they felt any form of romantic attraction to one another. She was just always side-by-side to Jungwon, metaphorically and literally speaking.

Their bonding was also fueled by her slight hesitancy toward Jay, it was nothing new, she just couldn’t help but always shy away from the charming young boy. This of course did not mean they were not friends though, who else would Y/N hang out with when Sunghoon was away and Jungwon was training in taekwondo?

Jay and Y/N spent a good chunk of their early childhood in one specific conference room, room 20C. Spending their time studying with tutors, then ignoring them, by the end of the day, they ended up playing stupid little games together instead of doing their assignments. Ultimately this resulted with their dads scolding them leaving Y/N as a crying mess with Jay comforting the poor sulking girl. In spite of all the scoldings and homework, room 20-Cube was their favorite place to be together. 

Although she was always with Jay, Jungwon was her extra set of limbs, the other pea in the pod, twin flame, ass crack to a fart, they befittingly clicked. They were the duo everyone wished they could have. Their siblings were nothing short of being the same way, it was like they were destined since birth to abide by the “bro-code”. Nothing could separate these four from each other or their duos. 

Due to Sunghoon frequently being abroad, he always felt extra protective of Y/N since he couldn’t always be there when she needed him. That’s part of the reason he loved Jay and Jungwon so much, they looked out for her when Sunghoon couldn’t.

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SKIPPING SOME PLOT POINTS AND SCENES FOR TEASER PURPOSES

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“Wonnie this is our last summer before we surrender ourselves to university and be too busy with everything to be together again and actually do something entertaining,” Y/N starts illustrating as she’s sobered up. Jungwon was just about to give her another one of his stupid one-liners, when he noticed that she seemed genuinely upset, tears welling up in her eyes. 

“You realize we’re still going to the same school, right? You act like we aren’t planning on rooming together. Or at the very least living in the same building, we’ll be together until DEATH, don’t play with me, Y/N.” He tries to not-so-lightly comfort her. “Okay loser, but I don’t wanna have a boring ass summer, I wanna bid a meaningful farewell to our childhoods,” Y/N retorts.

“We should all go on a vacation :D,” Heeseung butts in. Seeing the blank stares he got from his friends' younger siblings, he decides to read the room, “Never mind, sorry, YOU should go on vacation…I guess.. :\ ” 

“No no, you might be onto something here, I think we should all go somewhere, they want a nice little vacation before school, and we’re sick and fucking tired of it, we all deserve happiness in this life,” Sunghoon said, finally out of his sorrowful mood from earlier, eyes still puffy, nose still runny, and absolutely still sniffling, but he was finally done crying at least.

 “And get some bitches!” Jake follows up. 

“Don’t be fucking stupid Jake, there’s a lady in the room,” Heeseung retorts. 

“Barely,” Sunghoon and Jungwon say, synched up a little too well for Y/N’s mood.

 “Go kill yourselves,” she jokes. 

“I think it’d be great for all 6 of us to go, but where would we go?” Jay mumbles the last bit to himself, racking his brain for somewhere he hasn’t been that piques his interest.  

“I hear Mexico has some hot ass bitches,” Heeseung giggles to himself biting his lip. “I- uh. I mean I hear the nature is so pretty there!!”

“Heeseung I think you really need to take a step outside,” Jay scolds.

“Yeah the nature is so nice there :D” Jake says with the dumbest smile on his face.

“You two are for real peas in a pod,” Sunghoon comments disappointedly. 

“Jungwon, What do you think? I wouldn't mind going to Mexico.” Y/N murmurs to the boy next to her as she begins to sink into his side.

Wrapping a “protective” arm around her followed by, “I mean I've never been there. I don't care so much for where we go just as long as I can relax when and where I need to. I'm for it if everyone else is.”

“Mexico it is!!” Jay announces with a sinking feeling in his stomach with the sight unfolding in front of him.

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an: Thank you guys so much!! Please stay tuned

Sincerely, Admin: ༊·˚ and Admin: ପଓ

[angelicguy]

SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS deltarune spoilers:

Finished the new deltarune chapters. Found it really really great- i was worried about how they were going to combine the wacky stuff with actual story momentum and I think they did a great job by essentially separating it into the two separate chapters. The "real" game in chapter 3 was phenomenal- it had the perfect blend of wowww this is fucking creepy and stark without being overt, played on how "off" the original zelda games felt super well- the format of these games always criticize how people play RPGs specifically, so it was interesting to get a version of that with a different genre. honestly wish it was longer, but it was juuust enough developed gameplay to make it feel like an uncanny haze rather than an entire other segment. really really good. chapter 4 was bomb too, a more meat n potatoes for my approach (not killin nothin), way more of a focus on moving the broader plot forward, which after 7 years was absolutely the correct move. made sense pace-wise too- i was initially a little hesitant on the pace after how breakneck chapter 3 was (i think i almost finished it in 2 sessions, each about 2 hours? i had to replay the whole thing to get the secret boss, and that took 40 minutes) but knowing 4 was essentially the opposite tonally it made me appreciate them both more.

I do wonder if the presentation of all of this would have worked better if we just called the entire thing chapter 3- i get not wanting to set standards too high for future chapters length+content, but i still think chapter 2 was the best blend of gameplay, dialogue and secret stuff. how its divided now made chapter 3 feel more like 3/4ths of a full chapter- the lack of hometown segment didnt help with that impression, either.

i make fun of the dialogue often, and i dont think that's inappropriate- it can be really clunky and blunt. susie really does end up repeating the same handful of "i cant believe i have friends!" lines 30 times, ralsei is so obviously more aware of the broader story already. even tennas lines felt like watered down spamton tropes. after years of waiting, i felt a bit silly reading a lot of it- if i could make a single change to the writing, i would cut down on these hit-you-over-the-head obvious "wink wink" moments. in a game with so many well-hidden routes and interactions, i dont know why they have to allude to its weakest themes so often. make me search for it! finding tenna freaking out in the secret spots would have hit a lot harder if he didnt say what was on his mind in the base fights already.

but the games greatest narrative strength is making all the characters feel more in-depth than the average rpg npc- you WANT to interact with them, hear their next line, see what they would say to different dialogue options, etc. its the kind of thing you can't really get from other games and i think is what gives deltarune its energy. its short, but it really does feel like the 4 years it took to make werent wasted- the obsession with every possible outcome being acknowledged and covered, despite being such a linear game, gets me excited in the same way a good book or movie does. \

it feels like a culmination of a very late 90s early 2000s experience with gaming too. all the tropes it plays with dont really exist in the most popular titles of the last two decades, so im really impressed by how well it managed to keep plot that's rooted in what are now VERY OLD RPG mechanics (you controlling kris, who is a different person than you, the player) engaging and independent from the tropes theyre pulling from- you dont need to know about how saccharine and cloying old rpgs are (while i know toby fox is inspired primarily by earthbound, i get more criticism of dragon quest style rpgs here) but if you "get it" in the way the game does, it really adds a lot. undertale was always good, but undeniably 1 note in its presentation a decade after its release. the message in deltarune isnt simply "killing enemies in a video game just to lvl up is mean" anymore, but rather "isnt it strange that the RPG protagonists had entire lives before you take control of them?". i think that line of thinking allows the game to play with the fourth wall in a far more interesting way than simply having a character scold you for your actions- the game is scrambling to keep itself together during the weird route, and as someone who plays a LOT of video games im always thrilled to see something ive really never seen attempted before play out with such depth. So cool cant wait for chap 5

[sketchcasting]

As much as I'd like to keep this short, I know it's gonna be long. If you are prone to taking rant posts personally, please scroll away.

Also this is gonna center towards Ep. 5 since it's my most recent watch, but it still holds up my feelings about the show since Ep. 2 released.

I am under the impression that Gooseworx has most to all the creative control over the show, as it's something I've seen talked about cite wide when it comes to Glitch Studios. If this is the case, I wish there was someone (or some people) that would help her tighten those ideas together. Especially with this most recent episode, it felt unfinished. It came off to me more as a demo reel than an actual episode.

I think the setting and the main conflict is something interesting to dive into. It's what peeked my interest when the pilot came out. The execution so far on what we learn about the world around us has been poor however. As someone who's casually watching and not fully in the fandom culture of the show, I feel like I need to connect more with the characters first in order to retain why certain events are shocking (ex. when Pomni clips through the map in ep. 2 and sees the NPCs with Gummygoo). This would mean that I'd reorder/change the episodes so that, towards the beginning of the show, we mostly focus on character conflicts and foreshadowing to greater worldly conflicts so that the latter episodes can be more high stakes and tie in some of what the characters learned about each other. I'm mixed on the character development of the whole cast. I find a lot of potential with Zooble and Gangle's friendship building up. For me, it's a breath of fresh air when we constantly have bickering, anxiety, and a lack of harmony between the characters for a majority of the show. It's especially relieving when Jax and Raggatha come to mind. I feel like their conflict should've been resolved faster. Not to say that it gets fixed in one episode and they're totally perfect afterwards, no. I mean different issues get resolved which, overtime, diminishes the main conflict. Maybe one episode we can tackle Raggatha's constant babying of Pomni, and another, Jax learns that there's extreme consequences to his rudeness when unchecked. This episode, there was too much happening with the both of them, and in a way that makes me not continue to connect to the characters. I think Caine is starting to grow on me because he has a clear personal struggle that (as an artist and creator) I can relate to. The way he handles it, by trying the suggestion box or spitballing adventure ideas with the cast, and immediately experiences rejection is relatable. Which is ironic because his character is an ai (as far as we know).

I think the only characters that I have extreme qualms with is Jax and Bubble. Bubble has moments where I do chuckle a little, or they bounce well off of Caine. They, however, are smaller piece of a larger issue I have with the show. Glitch Productions has written in their "About" tab that they "... started with a singular goal: change the way the west creates teen and young adult animation." So they're aiming for 13-17 year old teens to enjoy the content, and they have mostly succeeded (source: I was essentially a camp counselor for high schoolers last year). To me, this show feels like it's confused on the main audience as it juggles between topics, settings, and moments that are suited towards middle grade (8-12 year olds) and young adult (their intended audience).

Jax makes it hard for me to watch this show. I like a mean character, don't get me wrong, but I don't have fun with his antics. Ep. 5 highlights pretty well to me that Gooseworx doesn't know how to write him or develop him in a way that naturally makes us show that he thinks about the others or desires friendship. There's small moments that I like, where, when everyone is holding their breath, he opts out in order to stay mysterious and intriguing. Cool, now we get a feel that he's hiding his vulnerability in small unimportant ways. But then you have the stargazing scene, where he suddenly looks at Gangle, a character he's been relentlessly bullying and physically harming throughout the show, and is like "Do you think Gangle is actually capable of being happy?" It felt forced for his character to question this. This being paired with the fan service this episode had, the comedic and the serious tones of the episode did not balance out well enough for him. Overall, I get the appeal of a character who's mean and uses it to shield being hurt again. But if I were to point at a character who was able to do this successfully, it'd (unfortunately) have to be Max from Camp Camp. What makes Max work so well that Jax doesn't is that him caring about someone he hated (David) was saved for the season finale. Which then, in S2, created a new boundary in his relationship with David. There are also other reasons, like how he still negotiated with people he saw value in, and how his plans never worked in the end. He wasn't 100% a snarky bully that didn't care about others opinions, unlike Jax.

Finally, episode 5, I'd completely reorder it. I found the hunting adventure and the president adventure unmemorable and unnecessary as it established something we knew already: Jax is a dick. The stargazing scene being next to the bar tending scene was a poor choice since they're both slow, contemplative scenes. We lose the importance of why these characters are talking about what they are talking about, as well as, when we get into the bar scene, there is nothing new to talk about. It makes them discussing about their old lives feel forced.

I feel like the evil team was under utilized. They were there to be a gag or show that Jax and evil Pomni are chill. We would've gotten more out of them if the evil versions of them could show that, despite being major assholes, they can all actually work together. Or maybe they are chill with each other but bully evil Jax instead. Or evil Ragatha and Jax are friends whilst evil Zooble and Gangle are hindering evil Pomni's performance (to parallel what Ragatha and Jax are doing to Pomni). There's a lot of ways they could've been used to have something thought provoking happen in the cast.

I think we'd get more out of the episode if we started with the anime scene (the 2D animation tickled me) then go into the bar scene, have an intermission, the softball scene, and lastly the stargazing scene. This is so that we can have Jax be a dick in the anime scene and seed in the conflict between him and Ragatha over Pomni. As well as him bullying Gangle. Going into the bar tending scene, we can establish that Zooble and Gangle are closer friends since the last episode, whilst Jax and Ragatha are passive aggressively asserting themselves into Pomni's decisions on what/who she should like and dislike, much to her displeasure. Also Zooble pointing out how weird it is, but directing it towards Jax since they all have beef with him. Caine gets bored and does the intermission. Then we have the softball scene where we can utilize the evil versions of themselves. The climax of the conflict happens here, and can be fully processed in the stargazing scene, where they can reflect on what happened, how they feel, and what they will take away from it. Also Zooble, Gangle, and Kinger eating sandwiches together because I really liked it and think it's strong to show Kinger, someone with bad memory/amnesia, hanging with chill friends rather than three people who were in the middle of an argument all episode. Like he gets the vibes.

Finally, to wrap this up. I am confused why they remember their pasts. I thought it was stated in the pilot that Pomni cannot remember hers, her name, what she looked like, everything. So it's jarring that suddenly they remember their old jobs and what they were like in the past. Also if they knew, it makes the bar scene even weirder since you'd think these characters would've mentioned it to each other before Pomni arrived.

Anyway, these are my points. I do not want to continue talking about the show. I still think it has potential, and that there are fun ideas in it, but the execution makes it weak. If this series ends in a way that neatly ties the main conflicts and questions together, you'd see me dancing naked in the streets.

I need Pomni to do this

[yasministration]

"Malfoy" "Weasley" - bill weasley x malfoy!reader

summary: when you watch the quidditch world cup with your family, the last thing you're expecting is to see an old friend. a weasley. wc: 1.2k+ cw: one tiny mention of abuse

The buzzing energy in the stadium felt as though it had suddenly been muffled as four figures entered the box. They walked with matching gait; confident, every pair of shoulders rolled back to walk with a perfect posture, a slow yet steady pace of footsteps that established power.

The Malfoys.

Harry swallowed thickly as he set his eyes on an unfamiliar figure. One he had never seen before, yet was so unmistakably Malfoy.

It was as though every sound in the stadium was muted, other than the seductive click of your heels on the floor. Harry took in your appearance from the floor upwards, watching the twinkle in your eyes in amazement. Despite the features you inevitably shared with the rest of your family, there was something different about you.

Something mischievous.

The boy who lived was snapped back to reality when Bill — who he had only met two days ago but already trusted with his life — spoke up.

“Malfoy.”

His statement wasn’t one filled with hatred, much to Harry’s surprise. No, it was amused, familiar, and it was targeted to you. As though you knew each other like two good friends. Whilst the rest of your family walked on with intimidating glares on their faces as they passed the Weasleys, you slowed your step down, keeping eye contact with Bill as your lips tugged up into an unbelievable smile, the wine red of your lipstick perfectly contained between their lines.

“Weasley.”

And you were gone.

Catching up to your family at a leisurely pace, you took a seat next to them, crossing one elegant leg over the other. Harry saw Draco turn to look at you judgementally, and his lips moved in a silent question.

You brushed him off. Harry’s eyebrows furrowed, listening in to the conversation that started between the Weasley siblings. “What was that?” Asked Ron with an exasperated breath. “Just greeting an old friend.” The older brother replied.

It was like watching Ron lose respect for his oldest brother, looking at him as though he grew two extra heads. Harry pondered silently for a moment. If Ron had such a reaction to his brother being friends with a Malfoy, how would your parents have reacted when they found out? Why hadn’t they said anything?

“Was she with you in school?” Harry found himself asking, and Bill nodded, gaze finding you again. The boy knew he shouldn’t think about it too much. Perhaps mind his own business for once.

But when you stood up from your seat at half-time, walking towards the group and Bill rose from his place to meet you, Harry couldn’t help but think of the two of you together. At Hogwarts. It was nearly impossible to imagine the both of you as teenagers, smiling fondly at each other as you walked through the halls.

A forbidden romance.

Had you been in love, or were you just unlikely friends? Whatever it was, it had evidently developed, Harry thought, watching as Bill leaned down closer to you to hear whatever it was you had to say, both of you smiling like idiots in love. Your hand slid down to the railing that Bill was tightly clutching, boldly placing your hand over his. Bill glanced down at the feeling of your touch, and he turned his hand over so his palm was facing upwards and he could properly hold your hand, his larger, veiny one encasing yours.

Behind the pair of you, your parents had tuned around from their conversation to watch you and the so called blood-traitor. Narcissa had placed a hand on her husband’s arm, prompting him to look away from the treacherous acts occurring in front of them. “Your parents still not too fond of me, I’m guessing?” Bill teased, and you tilted your head to the side with an apologetic smile.

“You know how they are. But it didn’t stop me when we were students and it won’t stop me now.”

Bill reached up with his free hand, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. Your eyes were glued to his face, so kind, so handsome.

You sighed.

“I’m an adult now,” You started, cutting off your own train of thoughts. “They can’t do anything about it anymore.”

Anymore.

Because when you’d been at Hogwarts, your parents had sent you howler after howler. They’d even pulled you out of class one time to lecture you about loyalty. You remember what you told your father that day. “I am loyal! I’m loyal to my friends, I'm loyal to the people I care about. I’m loyal to Bill, and you can’t do anything about it.” He had hit you across the face.

It didn’t stop you from sneaking out of your dorm every night to meet him in the girls’ third floor bathroom, a room that had become your ultimate rendezvous spot. Romantic.

Bill cleared his throat softly, looking around to find his entire family staring at your interaction. “Would you like to go for a walk?” He asked as he tore his eyes from them. You glanced around, staring at the empty pitch for one long moment before you spun around to look at him again, nodding eagerly. “I’d like that, yeah.”

Harry tried not judging you as you walked down the stairs, hands linking as you disappeared from sight. People do crazy things for love, he decided, realising you’d decided to skip watching half of the quidditch world cup to rekindle your relationship.

But maybe your decision had been smart, because as Harry and the Weasleys returned to their tent, they had caught you leaving. Bill held the tent's flap open, letting you through. You straightened up, eyes widening as you came face to face with his entire family, knowing you must have looked a mess. Fred, George and Charlie all had matching grins on their faces as they took in your unusually messy hair, smudged lipstick, bruising hickeys on your neck and chest exposed by the low neckline of your dress.

Bill looked just about the same, except most of the lipstick marks on his skin were covered by the collar of his shirt, trailing underneath it. You ducked your head down in embarrassment, gasping when Mr. Weasley patted your shoulder, saying “It’s good to see you again, y/n.”

“You too, Mr. Weasley.” As Bill kept eye contact with his three most delinquent brothers, he knew he was in for insurmountable amounts of teasing when he would enter the tent once more. Bill closed the tent’s flap when his family went inside, pulling a face at you when he faced you once more.

Giggling, you took three steps towards him, clutching his collar tightly and forcing him closer to you. Bill’s hands settled on your hips, and he leaned down to press a long kiss to your lips. You sighed in satisfaction, trailing your hands up to settle on his shoulders. Your lips separated with a loud smooching sound that had your cheeks flushing hotly and you looked away, making steady eye contact with Draco, who had been watching your interaction from afar.

“Better get here before the parents do!” He called out, and you nodded, looking between him and Bill quickly. “Um, he has a point.” You mumbled, pushing yourself on your tippy toes to press one last peck on his lips.

“At least promise me a date?”

“I can promise you more than a date, Mr. Weasley.”

“Oh please, Mr. Weasley is my father.”

[neoplatinum]

cowgirls do it better | sophia laforteza

synopsis: it's been 2 years. 2 years since your wife has ripped your heart out as she tried mending it. but now you're in her home court, to finalize the divorce. there's a couple things you need to learn about sophia's life before you leave.

pairing: (ex-ish) wife!sophia x cowgirl!reader

tags: angst, slow-burn, fluff, smut, g!p reader (don't like, don't read), alcohol, mentions of rehab, tension, marriage troubles, cheating but also not really cheating, slight religious themes, cowboys/cowgirls, a-list-celebrity!sophia, manon, more…

wc: 20.7k

"i'll be here waitin' ever so patiently, for you to snap out of it"

(part 1)

2 years later, lax, los angeles

“spare change?” 

it wasn’t how you imagined touching down in california. the casual mix of lavishness and poverty running like parallel lines through the city.

it’s not a pretty sight. 

you offer the man a couple bucks, hearing his praises of God and thanking you for your generosity. you give him a wave, leaving for your chauffeured ride. 

sophia had managed to send you a ride, with the cliché man dressed in a suit and sign with your name. the driver offers to take your duffel bags, dropping them into the trunk of his car. you hop into the car, a general feeling of restlessness running through your veins.

you swore that you would never step into this city. never let your path cross with hers again. she had her own life out here, and you had your own.

but of course, life has its own way. and you either try to fight against the current, or flow with it.

the ride was tedious at best, long traffic on the 5. sunny sunny california with people swarming. each with their own busy lives and even more complicated stories. you were just another story here, with a past that you were hoping to untangle here.

in an instant the buildings gave way to huge mountains. then you saw it, the large houses on the hills. grand spanish-style mansions, newly developed ultra modern ones with expansive windows. infinity pools on the cliffs. 

you definitely weren’t in your ranch back in new mexico. life moved differently here. you shift a bit in your seat, watching the city fly by in front of you. it's gorgeous, but you’d rather be here under different circumstances. 

the driver pulls into the ritz-carlton. definitely not the motel you booked for yourself. there’s a huge circle driveway with many nice cars parked out front for the valet. dark velvet carpets, almost welcoming you in like a star. you gave yourself a once over, the cowgirl attire wasn’t one that was common here. letting out a long sigh. you missed your idyllic life back at your ranch.

the driver drops off your bags onto a cart gently. he gives a slight nod of the head and soon a bellboy is immediately at your side. ready to push your stuff into the hotel. you’re getting money out of your wallet, when he pushes a hand out.

“ma’am, it’s been paid for. have a good rest of your day.” he leaves you and drives away.

fucking sophia. you curse her in your head. 

“of course she would do this”, you grumble to yourself, walking after the bellboy towards the receptionist’s desk. you can hear small conversations droned out by the large front lobby. there’s staff all around, ready at an instant to cater to any patron’s need. the bellboy continues to wheel the cart forward. the sound of your boots muffled by the velvet carpet.

and you arrive in front of the receptionist’s desk. several staff members rapidly typing on their computers. at the sight of you, a woman looks up, calling you up to the desk.

“good afternoon, i have a reservation.” you speak, grabbing your ID out of your wallet.

“oh perfect! we have you set up in the presidential suite.” the receptionist smiles at you, giving you a knowing look. she goes back to rapidly clicking and typing into her machine. 

“i’m sorry, do you know me?” you look a little lost.

“of course we do, miss laforteza informed us of your stay.” she offers a trained smile.

fucking sophia.

“right, of course…well, thank you.” you’re left a bit annoyed. 

who was she to dictate where you were going?

“here’s your room key and please feel free to call room service at any point. your tab has already been covered.” she explains, sliding over a small folder with your hotel keycard.

you offer an awkward smile to the receptionist before walking off to the elevators. your cowboy heels clack loudly against the waxed floor. 

you smooth out your hair for a second, already feeling annoyed that everything’s been paid for by sophia.

“may i see your card?” the bellboy askes you. you slide him your keycard, watching the way his eyes go wide at it.

he opens the large elevator and taps the keycard to head to the highest level of the hotel. and the elevator shoots up, rapidly climbing the tower where you can gaze out at the open city shrinking below you.

you admire the city for another couple of seconds when the elevator dings, and the doors open. 

you trail after the bellboy, entering the long hallway adorned with a gold and white floor. large oil paintings lining the walls, with individual lamps illuminating each one.

it’s starting to dawn on you that maybe you really don’t know sophia. you don’t know how she can afford this lavishness, enough to book you the presidential suite.

he opens the large doors to the suite for you, opening to the largest room you’ve ever stepped into. floor to ceiling windows peering over the city. a gorgeous large round table with a bouquet centerpiece. 

beautiful couches and sectionals just in the main area that you’ve walked into. you can spot at least three doors that must lead into their individual rooms.

“wow, i’ve never stepped in here.” the bellboy gives a whistle as he places your bags by the couches. he gives the room a once over before turning to you. “anything else i can help you with ma’am?”

“uh, no i’m all good.” you reply. and he’s starting to walk away, pushing the luggage cart. “wait! here, take this.” 

you hand him a 20, to which he smiles and happily pockets. closing the door behind him. 

and now you’re left in the presidential suite in a ritz-carlton.

you walk around, taking in the room, opening doors to more living rooms and bedrooms. a large california king with softer than silk duvets. the showers are humongous, enough to fit at least ten people inside. a beautiful vintage ceramic bathtub that is seated near the window. you eventually open to the balcony, a large infinity pool rushing with water. perfectly shaped hedges off to the side.

you can’t help but feel this is too much for you. this lavish suite is definitely worth more than your entire ranch and some.

you take off your boots by the door, getting situated in your suite. admiring the amount of closet space that’s available.

when you suddenly get a call.

“hello?” you prop the phone on your shoulder. trying your best to continue unpacking your duffel bags.

“hi! this is sarah from davidson & partners. i have you scheduled for a meeting at 1pm tomorrow, just calling to confirm.”

you roll your eyes, what a great way to get introduced to the state. 

“yes, i’ll be there.” 

“perfect, see you then!” and then she hangs up. 

you tuck your phone away, this was going to be a long trip. 

maybe you could take yourself sightseeing while you were here. trying to get the heavy feelings off your mind. 

trying to get a certain woman out of your mind.

you walk out the suite, ready to get out of this over-the -top suite when you hear a voice call out. 

“hey, neighbor!” a woman’s voice comes out light and inviting. you swivel your head to a gorgeous woman. dressed like she just stepped out of her nearest tailor shop. a gorgeous blazer and pencil skirt that fitted her perfectly.

you blink a bit before collecting yourself, walking up to her with a hand out.

“hi, nice to meet you.” you offer, she shakes your hand. warm and smooth fingers that slide into yours.

“i’m manon, have i seen you before?” she asks, presenting a charming smile, pearly white teeth and sharp eyes to pair.

“probably not, it’s my first time in california.” you reply, tucking your hand into your belt again.

“are you here to do touristy things? or would you like the inside scoop?” manon winks a bit, clearly amused by your out of state attire and look. 

you don’t miss how she’s given you at least two top to bottom scans.    

“i’m figuring it out…” you gesture aimlessly. then a thought runs through, “you recommend a place to enjoy some peace and quiet?”

“there’s an absolutely gorgeous beach not too far from here.” she grabs a quick paper from her hotel pad, jotting down the directions for you.

“thanks, manon.” you pocket the slip, “i’ll see you around.”

you give a quick wave, and she waves back too.

“buy me a drink sometime!” manon shouts before closing her hotel door.

you descend down the very fast elevator and are about to grab a ride when the valet walks up to you, keys in hand.

“hi! miss laforteza informed us you might need a car during your stay. here’s the car she requested.” he gives you a bright smile, dropping a pair of keys into your hands.

and you swivel your head to a cherry red vintage jeep wrangler. open chassis and red rims to match. 

jesus, she even remembered your dream car.

“i, thank you.” you wave the guy off and he heads back to his stand. your eyes drift to the car again, a clean exterior and interior. you give a little tire check with your boot and examine the engine.

it’s well maintained, clean oil and no sign of leaks.

she did her research, color you impressed. she even remembered the small details. your favorite scent of car freshener dangling by the mirror. you hop in the car, engine rumbling smoothly, it’s obvious this car had a good owner.

you pull off the lot and head to a beach. the wind in your hair and you can hear the seagulls cawing by the ocean. it’s a gorgeous sight, rays of sun peeking into the car. 

you gradually come to a parking spot, locking the car and tossing the keys in hand as you walk away. the beach is looking magnificent, there are some people playing beach volleyball and others still tanning. 

meanwhile, you’re in your cowgirl getup, a little too dressed for the occasion. peeling off your boots and rolling your pants far enough to keep them from getting wet.

you can feel the sand in between your toes. the sand warmed by the sun. and then you step forward, walking towards the ocean and pushing sand behind you.

the ocean is beautiful, gorgeous small waves crashing against the shore. leaving behind darker wet sand. you let the wave crash against your feet, cold ocean water as a contrast against the warm sand.

it’s definitely gorgeous out here, you can’t remember the last time you were by the ocean, maybe when you were a kid?

letting nature continue to move between your toes. water running around your legs and retreating back to the ocean.

then a dog runs past you, darting across the waters in front of you. tongue hanging out his mouth as he chases after a small rubber ball.

he catches it in his mouth and darts back to his owner. a kid no older than ten and cheering his dog on. you smile warmly at the scene unfolding. 

his dog barks loudly, awaiting another throw to which the young boy launches the ball forward.

“go, max!” you hear him shout, and the dog’s already leaped into the air, mouth open as he grabs snatches it out the air. the young boy rejoices when the dog turns around.

it reminds you of charlie, his beautiful eyes staring at you whenever you fill his bowl, or pet him right behind the ears.

maybe it’s slipped past you, maybe in this life you don’t get what you want.

instead you focus out, looking at the sun casting on the water, ripples that look like diamonds dancing on the surface. you can spot some yachts out far away, large cargo ships in the distance.

the water continues to splash against your legs, you feel at peace here. there’s nothing else but you and nature right now. 

you let your shoulders drop, the tension from having to come to california has weighed on your mind. you try to let yourself relax for a while, watching the ocean as it comes and goes.

--

“no lara, listen to me, it’s not like that.” sophia rambles on the phone, trying to grab a smoothie from her fridge.

“yeah, and how would you describe this? hollywood star sophia laforteza seen walking into davidson & partners. literally the best known divorce firm in all of california.” lara is mocking her, reading off a fake tmz headline. “maybe there’s a secret life sophia’s hiding?”

sophia rolls her eyes at the comment, “it’s going to be fine lara. i’ll be discreet.” sophia uncaps the smoothie, drinking it as her friend continues to express her worries.

“discreet isn’t exactly your style sophie.” lara laughs out. 

and sure she may be right, but sophia could be discreet, right?

“nuh uh, you’re probably trying to convince yourself you can be discreet. and the answer is no.

sophia’s jaw drops. “i can be discreet!” 

“you’re about as discreet as a peacock. now listen, what you need to do is meet her somewhere else. somewhere out the public eye.” lara shuffles a bit over the phone, and sophia sets her smoothie down.

“like where?” sophia’s waiting for a magical answer.

“somewhere like uh…what about her hotel?” lara lets it roll off her tongue and immediately sophia feels like a train crash.

“that is the worst idea i’ve heard yet. and you’ve convinced me to go to an award show hungover.” sophia laughs a bit.

“you booked the room, the chauffeur, and the car. i think you’re allowed to go inside.”

“she’s going to shoot me in between my eyes before i open the door.” sophia picks up the smoothie again, grimacing at the taste.

“no she wouldn’t! she married you.” lara explains.

“yeah, that was before she found out i had a fiancé.” sophia rolls her eyes again.

“well, pseudo-fiancé, maybe you could profess your undying love and make more babies, because this one is so darn cute!” lara coos at the toddler. “yes you are! yes you are!”

“lara please, she hates my guts, practically told me so when she ran out on me.” sophia laments. 

the feelings still burn like an open wound.

“so she hates you but you still kept her kid?” lara questions.

“i still love her, you know that.” sophia sighs out.

its quiet for a second.

“your mom is so dramatic isn’t she?” lara’s voice has gone up in pitch, playing with sophia’s kid. “yes she is! yes she is!”

sophia can hear her baby babbling and squealing in delight. “anyways, don’t meet her at the firm, paps are watching you like a hawk.”

“you don’t have to remind me.” sophia lets out with a sigh. 

there used to be a time where she could just exist, without worry of the public. but those days are long gone.

suddenly there’s rustling sounds and a loud wail from the speakers.

“uh oh, your baby just crapped her pants. say bye bye now!” sophia can hear the lara’s poor imitation just above her baby’s wails. “auntie lara signing off, go win her back!”

and then the line hangs up, sophia doesn’t even have time to say goodbye.

“fuck.” 

sophia throws her head in her hands.

--

“hello?” you’re half dressed, wearing shorts and a tank with your hair all over. still rubbing your eye as you try to sharpen enough.

“hi, good morning! it’s sarah from davidson’s, we spoke yesterday. mind if we come up? 

“huh? yeah sure, come on up.” you speak into the hotel phone. half drowsy when you look over and see 7 am flashing on the alarm clock.

you stumble a bit as you approach the door, hearing quick knocks against the door.

“coming, just one second!” 

you rush back to slide on some longer pants and head for the door, unlocking it to the sight of two very well dressed lawyers. both with polite smiles on their face.

“sorry to bother you so early, but it’s urgent.” the woman states and you let them in. 

immediately they place their briefcases on the table. taking out pens, recorders, legal pads and laptops.

behind them, two security guards walk in. they immediately begin scanning the suite. large devices that are moving up and down the rooms. they approach each window and immediately pull the blinds, covering the outside light from coming in. 

it’s like the secret service securing the west wing.

“hey, what are they doing here?” you ask, still yawning a bit.

“that’s our intel security team, we need to ensure this space isn’t tapped since we’re away from our firm. it’s standard protocol.” sarah is very direct, the smile disappears off her face as she sips on her coffee.

her counterpart is rapidly typing on his laptop, flipping through binders like a madman, but with precision behind each move.

“is this really necessary? it’s just me here.” you ask, a little perturbed at the intrusion.

“have you heard of brad and angelina, or bill and melinda? well those clients pay us, pardon my language, a shit ton of money to keep their divorces private.” sarah continues, not missing a beat as she types on her own laptop.

“it’s in our and your best interest that we follow procedures.”

“right…sorry for the offense ma’am.” you offer back.

“none taken. just doing our jobs.” she continues to drink her coffee. and suddenly the door is closed behind you, gone are the two mysterious men that stepped in.

“john, intel team left, place is clean, put that in the notes.” sarah speaks to the other lawyer, rapid typing ensuing.

“i thought we were meeting at the firm?” you ask, letting your arms hang on the back of a chair.

sarah looks away from her screen.

“mrs. laforteza requested to move up the meeting and in a discreet location, so we’re here to set up in time for her arrival.”

“here? as in this room?” you ask, the shock making you stand up taller.

“yes, this room. she’ll be here in…” sarah looks down at her watch, “15 minutes, well 14 now.”

“15 minutes?” you’re wide eyed and stunned, rushing off to the bathroom. trying to freshen up before seeing sophia again. 

you can feel your heart hammering as you brush your teeth. memories flowing through you as you wash your face. you try to calm your clammy and shaky hands.

you can still hear the hushed whispers from the lawyers, 

putting on a shirt over your head, you step out, still looking tired. but definitely more presentable than how you woke up.

you’re ready to drop your shoulders when there’s a sudden knock on the door.

shit.

you smooth your hair out once more and walk towards the door. giving a final breath and opening it.

the light from the windows illuminate sophia. she’s got a cap, sunglasses, dark clothes and no makeup in sight. 

she doesn’t look like the woman that broke your heart.

you gesture to her to walk in, not even able to greet her. she gives a nod when she walks in. immediately you smell the familiar scent of her perfume. you inhale the scent enough that make your heart beat quicker.

it pulls you in, like it always has. truthfully, you don’t know if you’ll ever be tired of the scent.

eyes on the ground as she walks away, trying not to show how affected you are. even without a single touch she has your insides all shaken up. 

you follow behind her, taking notice of her slow steps. like she’d rather just run out the door at a moment’s notice. 

sophia pulls a seat on the other side, dropping her purse lightly. your eyes watch her intently, like you’re tracking her. after some searching, she takes out a folder filled with documents, all tabbed with notes. you watch her separate them into piles, hand meticulous and deft.

sarah and her counterpart watch her as well.

sophia finally settles in her seat. and gives a nod to the lawyers.

“welcome to the first divorce settlement conference.” sarah starts, “we will begin recording…now.”

you watch her press a button on the recorder. the room’s feeling a bit too stuffy now. it’s really here, the dreaded divorce that you tried to put away, just like the stubborn feelings you had.

she gives you a quick glance, just enough to commit your face to memory now. your cheeks are more sunken and those dark circles spell trouble. 

in you, there’s a war against what you want and what you need. you listen to what you need. barely sparing sophia a glance, she doesn’t deserve it. in your head she didn’t deserve any of you, but in your heart…it still beat for her.

“now let’s get the structure of these meetings understood. we will be discussing property division, child support, and spousal support if applicable.” sarah continues.

“this is my colleague, who will be here for note-taking as well as shifting responsibilities as needed.”

you and sophia both give a firm nod.

“let’s start with property division. under page 2, section 5a.” sarah begins, flipping to a new section of her binder.

you both follow suit with your own copies. eyes reaching past all the legal jargon.

“the ranch in new mexico, measured at twenty acres. including livestock, house, and the barn.”

“that’s mine.” you speak up, and sophia snaps her eyes up to you, crossed arms that loosen at the sight of you.

she hasn’t heard your voice in all this time, a pained reminder of the last words you said, correction: shouted at her.

“mrs. laforteza?” sarah questions.

“that’s hers, and sophia, just sophia.” sophia replies.

“sophia, and thank you.” the lawyers are scribbling and typing in their laptops.

it’s strange how calm the room is. four people here to settle a divorce in the presidential suite of a ritz-carlton.

you grab a sip of water, watching sophia through your eye line. 

she’s a bit dazed, eyes that seem so lost. and maybe if you weren’t so heartbroken, you would offer some comfort.

“great, next is the large 1930s spanish-style mansion in the hollywood hills, measured at seven thousand square feet. 6 bedrooms, 8 bathrooms.” sarah continues.

your eyes nearly bulge out.

“that’s hers.” you speak up, coughing a bit as you clear your throat.

“sophia?”

“yes, that is mine.” sophia shifts her legs a bit.

you sink into your seat, this was going to be a long meeting. 

the hours continue, discussions of property grew to be extensive. you didn’t realize how much needed to be accounted for. 

as well as revealing how much money sophia had accumulated. the star was definitely well-paid. 

and you were slowly realizing how small you felt.

there was nothing comparable to the net worth of sophia laforteza. you once felt so confident and proud of your ranch, a safe haven for you both. but now you feel like maybe you weren’t a good enough provider.

maybe that’s why she left you.

you snap out of your spiral when the lawyers call for a break. giving time for a short walk and stretch. 

you do notice that sophia’s been unfocused. blank stares as the lawyers discuss among themselves.

“would anyone like room service?” you ask into the air. and the two lawyers walk over to you.

“coffee and a bagel with cream cheese please.” you scribble it down.

“would you like anything?” you turn to the other lawyer.

“also coffee, but i’ll have a muffin and apple.” you jot down their orders, and writing another line as you call room service.

room services picks up immediately at the first ring, a woman helping you get all the orders down with efficiency. 

sophia’s still in a daze, her hand slightly shaking in her lap.

you try not to notice it, especially given your now relationship with her. 

when room service arrives, you thank the server. offering a tip as he exits the room again. the lawyers are eager to have something in their stomach. 

you can imagine the hours are also taking a toll on them.

but your mind is focused on the other person in the room. you walk towards sophia with a bowl of fruit and yogurt and a glass of water in hand.

placing it down in front of her, causing her to focus again. a light gasp when she sees your face so close. 

“this is for you, i bet you haven’t had anything today.” you say softly.

it’s not supposed to mean anything, just a simple gesture. but to sophia, she feels like she could crumble.

sophia nods firmly, a bit too firmly. its like the words won’t come out her throat. like she isn’t still madly in love with you.

“excuse me for a second.” sophia makes a quick dash for the bathroom. and you watch her retreating body disappear behind the door.

both lawyers stare at the door as well, giving you a quick look before returning to their conversation.

what you don’t know is that sophia’s sobbing. crying into her mouth so she doesn’t let out a sound.

how could she ever act like she isn’t completely and utterly in love with you? how you still stir up feelings in her body that make her want to reach out to you?

how she had to give herself a ten minute pep talk in her car before stepping out.

God, she was a wreck. 

she gives herself a minute. just one. enough to pull herself together, broken sobs and pain shooting in her heart. 

you stand by the door, caught between wanting to knock and wanting to give her space.

“fia?” you ask. “you okay?”

you faintly hear it, a sob that’s trying to break out of her throat. 

“i’ll be-i’ll be out in a second!” she tries her best to sound normal. rapidly wiping tears off her face and giving herself a quick check in the mirror.

thank God for waterproof mascara. 

she looks presentable, just enough to cover the traces of her tears. with a shaky breath she moves for the door, opening it to you on the other side.

your worried eyes that look too warm, in her mind a flash of angry eyes hit her. it reminds her why she’s here. why you ran out on her with resentment in your eyes.

but you stand here, unmoving and looking into her. and she nearly breaks again, digging her nail into her thigh, trying to keep the tears at bay. long enough to get through this.

you want to ask her what’s wrong but she gives you a controlled smile. one that lets you know she doesn’t want to speak about it. and she doesn’t, instead she walks back to her chair. 

calmly sitting again and scooping yogurt into her mouth. you pull the chair next to her, resuming the silent war between both of your conflicting feelings.

the lawyers both return to their chairs. and offer each other a look when sarah speaks.

“thank you both for a productive meeting, we will meet again in two days.” 

sarah and her counterpart gather all their belongings again. tucked away neatly into their briefcases. both offering a handshake before leaving. 

you shake their hands and thank them for their time. watching them until they close the door behind them. 

then you’re left with sophia. 

you’re left with sophia.

you turn towards her, watching her pack her purse with all the documents she had laid out. she’s in a slight hurry, you can tell by the frazzled eyes and jittery hands. 

she also realizes that she’s left with you.

you stand off to the side, silently watching her. she then shifts back, pushing the chair in and she then tries walking out.

you feel yourself panic, something unsettling erupting in your stomach. 

“thanks for everything. you know, the hotel, the car, everything.” you speak quickly. “you didn’t have to.”

“you’re welcome. it’s really no problem.” sophia’s voice is shaky. 

she waits a beat. 

“it’s nice. to see you, i mean.”

and without another word she walks out the door, closing the door behind her.

you sink into yourself, feeling yourself cringe at the comment. you felt so stupid speaking up.

--

“so spill, how was it?” lara lounges on sophia’s couch, sparkly eyes as she’s trying to pry. 

sophia gives a sigh before joining her on the couch.

“it was…amicable.” sophia didn’t want to talk about how she broke down crying in your bathroom. how you reminded her of her wedding day. 

she’d rather shove all those feelings down.

instead sophia recounts, you looked familiar. too skinny in her mind. you definitely lost weight, she had hoped it wasn’t because of her.

“amicable? your wife hates your guts and she’s amicable!” lara exclaims. 

“it’s not like a movie, you know? we may be actresses but that’s not her.” sophia continues to explain.

“what about you? i bet you were shaking like a chihuahua.” lara spoke.

“i was not! i was very professional.” sophia exclaims. “she was too.”

lara groans, “that’s not fun!”

“divorce settlements aren’t meant to be fun.” sophia explains.

“not as fun as you, right?” lara lifts anna into the air, the baby squealing loudly.

“hand her to me.” sophia opens her arms, and then the baby is propped in her lap. “i saw your mama today, she’s still very pretty.”

the baby babbles a bit, “mama.”

“yes, your mama. she’s lost some weight.” sophia says gently, rocking her toddler slowly. “i’ll have to make her some sinigang.”

anna claps her hands together in excitement.

“okay, this is really sweet, but you’re making me sad.” lara speaks up, and sure sophia’s thought about it. “and i don’t get sad, so go make up with her.”

“i can’t. and you know why.” 

“fuck him! he doesn’t get to dictate your life just because his daddy’s got a big name.” lara scoffs, grabbing anna again.

sophia shakes her head. in an ideal world thomas never existed, or any kind of person like thomas. 

in her ideal life she had you, anna, and grew together. maybe had a couple anna’s with you.

but she’s dug herself in this hole, and she needs to dig herself out.

--

“mrs. laforteza, hey, it’s good to hear from you.” you dig a stick a little further in the sand. 

you stare into the sand, drawing small circles. 

“hi dear, how are you?” mrs. laforteza’s warm voice comes through the phone. 

it’s comforting. she’s like a second mom. you basically grew up in her house.

eating dinner with her, cleaning dishes, helping mr. laforteza with ranch work. it felt like you were always meant to be in this family.

“it went okay…” you drag out, thinking about your stay here. 

the divorce settlement meeting was tense, and its driven you away from the hotel. the room feeling suffocating despite how big it was. you keep feeling this unsettling feeling that something’s wrong.

something’s wrong and you don’t know how to fix it.

so instead, you’ve been spending many hours outside, enjoying the summer sun. trying to find peace with life as it is, especially with the divorce coming.

“just okay? you don’t sound like someone who is okay.” she speaks.

you can hear charlie’s pants through the speakers.

“i’ll be alright, it’s really nice out here.” you look out to the ocean, squinting as you look at the rays of light. “i get why she came out here.”

“i’m sure.” 

mrs. laforteza has always been sweet, trying to be as gentle as she can. knowing that her daughter has broken your heart. “she’s trying to fly us out soon.”

“yeah you both would really like it here.”

maybe a part of you is stuck, stuck waiting for some big reveal that sophia didn’t mean to crack your heart.

you tried moving on. all the worries, pain and anguish slowly dying within you. but some days the feelings overwhelm you, and it’s like you’re back at square one.

“listen dear, you’ll always be a daughter to us, married or not.” mrs. laforteza continues and you can feel the tears welling up in your eyes. “never forget that.”

you nod but then realize how she wouldn’t see that. 

“of course ma’am, thank you for always being there.”

“oh honey, we’ll always be here.” 

you hear charlie's yips as he chases after a ball that sophia’s dad is throwing.

“you think she meant it?” you ask into the open air.

“meant what, dear?”

“you think she meant to break my heart?” you feel like retracting the question as soon as it came out of your mouth. 

who in their right mind asks their mother-in-law this?

“i don’t think she meant to. i think she wanted to save what she could, and your heart paid the price.” you listen to the faint noise of a rocking chair as she continues.

“sometimes, i wish she never liked me back.” you say it and truly you don’t mean it. 

but it stings a little less to imagine a world where you weren’t as foolishly in love.

“honey, that girl loved you the second she laid eyes on you.” mrs. laforteza laughs out loud.

“when i saved her from those coyotes?” you let out a choked laugh at the memory.

“she came running back the ranch, screaming her head off about how you protected her and looked so cool.”

you wipe a tear from your eye. 

“what else did she say?”

“she told me she was going to marry you someday. swore on the Bible she would.” 

you still your movement. 

“did she?” you ask, your heart is blossoming in that way that your brain hates. hates how she still had you wrapped around her finger.

“sure did.”

you let the silence hang in the air. listening to seagulls and soft waves crashing against the shore. trying to think about your next steps, what life would mean for you once you’re really divorced.

suddenly a voice pulls you out of your thoughts.

“hey, neighbor!” a familiar light voice comes through, you tilt your head just enough to see her. large glasses and a beach shawl covering a bikini set. she looks ready to enjoy the beach. you give a light wave to her, as she sits next to you. a large grin on her face.

“hey, it’s good to see you.” you offer, and she nods a bit, watching you, observing the way the smile doesn’t reach your eyes. 

“i would say the same, but you seem a bit…what’s the word? sulky?” manon shrugs, a bit of amusement in her face as she watches you lean back in shock.

“i am not sulky!” you exclaim, hand on your heart like you’re clutching a pearl necklace.

“then what is this?” she points at your six pack of beer, a couple already popped open and empty, grabbing one to open.

“this is…leisure…” you gesture to the space around you. she gives you that look, the kind of look your friend gives you when they know you’re full of shit.

“you’re not convincing anyone with those eyes.” she points out, taking a sip of beer with you, a slight grimace at the taste. 

“what about my eyes?” you take another swig, looking back onto the shoreline, watching someone swim out.

“sad, like you have a thousand yard stare kind of sad.” she laughs to herself as she explains it. 

and really if you had to guess, maybe you do given everythings that’s been happening to you.

“i’m just…dealing with a lot.” you explain, she takes another sip of her beer, despite the taste.

“yeah? tell me about me.” she urges you on, nudging your shoulder a bit. and really life has been so down, you’re more than compelled to spill your secrets out.

“the reason i'm here,” you gesture at the area around you. “is because my wife is divorcing me. i’m here to settle the divorce.” 

and clearly that wasn’t the response manon was expecting. she’s taken aback, slowly digesting and trying to find the words to comfort you.

“wow, that’s a lot. yeah i don’t blame you for doing this.” she comments, trying her best to lend an ear. you give her a nod, thanking her just for the company. 

it’s nice to have someone who knows nothing about her past, a clean slate.

“is it her fault?” manon asks you, genuine interest in her eyes.

“i think so.” you offer. manon doesn’t press further, eyes also watching the ocean, sitting quietly together and admiring the sunset.

“well, to a clean and quick divorce!” manon lifts her glass, you lift yours too. making a light clinking sound as you both sit in silence once more.

--

this was not how sophia wanted to start her morning.

“sophia! my lovely fiancé! to what do i owe the pleasure?” his slimy voice coming through the speakers.

sophia’s already burning. a hot heat of anger spreading through her nervous system. 

a reaction to the sickly headlines funneling out of drama journals and anyone that cared remotely about sophia’s career.

“thomas. getting caught in ibiza with supermodels?” sophia bites out, her manager sitting beside her. tablet in hand as they scroll through the damning evidence.

“easy tiger…i was just celebrating my birthday. you know how those weekends go.” sophia can hear his cockiness through the phone. “which, by the way, you should’ve posted about, it’s pr 101.”

sophia wants to scream. she has not worked this hard in her career to be seen as anything less than a star in her own right.

this man is going to drag her reputation down with his.

“happy belated…but learn to cover your bases, asshole.” 

“stop acting like my mother.” his voice turns into that disgusting condescending tone. 

the one he puts on when he thinks he’s better than you. 

“more importantly, how’s the divorce settlement going?”

it grates against sophia’s ears. 

“it’s going well, don’t get into my business.” sophia scoffs.

“well, then don’t get into mine.” he retorts back. 

sophia continues to try to not curse him out. her manager looking at her in worry, all sophia can do is try to think about happy thoughts.

happy thoughts about anna or you.

he coughs a bit.

“you better attend my dad’s birthday gala next weekend.” 

she thinks about it, thinks about how she’d rather be at home with anna. but duty calls.

“fine. send over the details.”

he hangs up, sending an address and time. and sophia’s losing her mind all over again.

shouting at no one in particular about how much of a jackass thomas is. how his incessant need for the party lifestyle is going to ruin sophia’s life.

she needs a way out, and she needs it soon.

--

this wasn’t how sophia wanted to plan her evening. she wanted to be at home, a glass of wine in hand as she watches some silly tv show for the fiftieth time.

she’d play with anna and lounge outside the backyard. or have a lazy night swim.

but here she is in her long cocktail dress, a jacket adorned with pearls to match. it’s enough to stay afloat at the party, enough to be noticed, but also not stand out. 

with all the old executives and their much-too-young trophy wives on display, sophia wants to leave.

thomas has already turned on his flashy smiles at his dad’s friends. each of them giving respectable nods, just enough to acknowledge him, but not enough to respect him.

he tried parading sophia around, introducing her as his fiancé, to which many seemed disinterested. some women even looked at her in pity, but she held her head high enough.

luckily she spotted lara not too far away.

“oh thank god you’re here, these people are so boring.” lara starts, giving everyone an evil eye before smiling at sophia.

sophia feels exactly the same.

“i hate going to these. no one cares anyways.” sophia continues, and honestly her life has been feeling like that lately.

she’s still a very high profile star, but with the status comes having to attend these more than necessary events. to mingle and be amongst those that run the industry, it gets boring to a point.

“how’s anna?” lara asks, softly tilting her champagne flute around. 

that lights up sophia’s eyes.

“so cute, the babysitter just sent this photo.” and sophia shows the young toddler, sound asleep and tucked into her bed. with her mouth hanging slightly open.

“aw that munchkin, she’s so adorable.” lara coos at the photo.

“i know, yesterday she was trying to open all the kitchen cabinets.” sophia shows another photo of the young girl, wide eyed and caught by sophia’s camera.

sophia reminisces on the photos, scrolling to one that made her heart clench. 

it was a picture of a frayed photo of you and sophia, much younger and much stupider.

silly marks on each other’s faces and stickers all over your shirt. sophia’s wearing your cowboy hat and you’re wearing the pair of boots she gifted you. both seated on mr. laforteza’s truck bed.

lara gives a quick look at sophia, watching the way she pauses herself. admiring memories of her youth that she left behind.

lara looks a little closer.

“anna has her eyes.” lara points her finger down, “the way she scrunches them with her smiles. it’s just like hers.”

“really? i never noticed that.” sophia zooms in on you, the way you smile so hard that your eyes disappear. 

anna does the same whenever she’s finished with her food, or accidentally knocks over a cup of milk.

sophia feels like she could throw up at the fact. 

she’s been trying so hard to keep the memories of you alive in anna’s life. showing her old photos that she stole from the ranch house. reminding her of her other parent.

enough to make anna realize that you are indeed her mama. and sometimes sophia thinks she can recognize you, or maybe she’s just repeating the words back.

when really you always existed in anna.

“i think you should tell her about anna.” it’s not accusatory or said without knowing the context between you two. 

lara had been the first friend sophia made when coming to california. two girls with dreams in their heads and hopes in their hearts. to “make it” out here in hollywood. discussing their dreams and deepest fears of what makes them human. bonding over that shared desire for greater.

so really, lara understood her. understood how the fear of rejection from you would break sophia all over again. 

she saw it firsthand when sophia returned to california. she wasn’t the same, barely was able to pull herself long enough to go outside. 

and when sophia first got her morning sickness, lara was the one waiting in the bathroom with her. waiting for the pregnancy tests together.

“i want‐i want to. but i’m scared. i’m scared she’ll realize that she wants nothing to do with me or anna.” 

sophia speaks truthfully, it broke everything in her when you told her to leave. she had never seen you so angry and upset, like a caged deer, trying so hard to escape. 

she couldn't bear to hear how you don’t want her anymore. her heart would crack open again.

and what if you didn’t want to be involved in anna’s life?

“but what if she did? anna deserves a chance to know her.” lara continues, a sad warm smile on her face. “they both deserve the chance to be in each other’s life.”

it’s not like sophia hadn’t contemplated this before. each prenatal visit making her cry all over again. the ultrasounds, the first heartbeat, even the delivery.

she wished you would just burst through the doors, rushed comments about traffic running late and hold her hand as she went through this scary pregnancy. comforting words and soft affection as she went through the trimesters.

she wouldn’t trade anything for anna. she just wish you were here to experience it with her.

lara lets the topic go, it’s hard to see her closest friend so caught in between worlds. so much of her life she sacrificed and only to be left unsatisfied. it’s heartbreaking, and she hopes sophia will get her happiness back.

to much of the dismay of sophia, thomas’s father began speaking. welcoming all the guests through loudspeakers in his mansion. attracting the attention of all guests, but sophia’s heard this speech at every previous party before. how he owes all his accomplishments to a very special mentor of his. and then he gives that short anecdote about being a young and bright-eyed filmmaker. hoping to get his projects out into the world.

with a slight tug of her arm, lara pulls her away from the crowd, all entranced by the story.

“he’ll probably go on for another hour, come on, let’s go see if there’s some good liquor.” lara smirks. dragging sophia away from the main room, soon they’re walking across marbled flooring. large doors leading into the big pool out back, fountains pouring into the pool.

lara eventually pulls them into a large room. large dark oak bookshelves lining the back wall. each filled with hard covered books lining each shelve. a single lamp illuminating the room. large arabian carpets covering the floor. a heavy wooden desk sat close to the bookshelves. a fit study room for a world-renowned director.

“this camera probably costs more than a house.” lara points out the giant standing camera in the other corner of the room, and sophia would agree. 

it drives her insane how much of thomas’ life was just handed to him, the opulence, the trust fund, all of it simply because he was born into the family. sometimes sophia wished thomas never existed. didn’t use his unlimited power for evil, to manipulate and control the weak.

“shit, sophia. come look at this.” sophia walks towards lara, finding her looking at an open drawer, a manila folder already opened on the table. “S.L.” in bold letters stamped on the front.

images spill out from the manila folder, each one from different events that sophia has attended. either red carpets or pictures from her acting. it’s haunting, it’s like she’s being watched. 

and then it gets worse. 

there’s photos of her child, anna running around in sophia’s backyard. photos of sophia lifting her kid in the air and spinning her around. it makes sophia sick to her stomach. 

“lara, lara…” sophia turns to lara with tears in her eyes, shock making her ears pop and tinnitus ringing. her blood has run cold and so has her body, a slight shaking as she steps away from the table, away from the contents of her private life being captured.

“sophia, it’s okay, come on focus on me.” lara’s trying to stabilize a very lost sophia, her eyes keep darting everywhere. there’s thoughts flowing faster than water down an edge of a cliff.

“he knows. he knows anna.” sophia can feel her breath getting shorter, it’s harder to breath in deeper without feeling like she’ll hyperventilate. and lara’s trying her best to calm her down. but fuck if this isn’t a slap in the face.

she tried so hard to protect anna, going as far as to disappear to give birth. not even letting thomas near her or to see her. it was her way of protecting anna and protecting you.

“what else is in there? i bet that jackass has other dirt on me.” sophia asks through harder breaths. the sudden shock and stress is constricting her airways. 

lara’s searching through the folder, eventually dumping it all out on the table. and out flys two contracts.

“it’s your acting contract.” lara’s quickly reading through it, familiar clauses from her very own. the clauses of work, management, pr image, conditions of pay. all of it laid out and then lara lands on a tab. highlighted in orange and circled in red pen. conditions of pr image and the ability for the company to manage sophia’s pr image if it were to slip into a scandal. and possible pr management rights reserved for the company. 

“hold on…” lara flips through the rest of the contract, finding nothing else out of the ordinary. “something’s not right.”

sophia’s holding onto the edge of the hardwood desk, trying to count to four in her head during each breath, slowly bringing down her heart rate. she can barely hear lara through the ringing. 

“did you know about this?” lara looks at sophia, another contract in hand. 

“what?” sophia barely gets out, straightening herself when lara is breezing through the contract.

“it’s thomas. the trust. the inheritance. all of it.” lara continues to read through the pages, eyes moving left and right. “sophia. his father’s trust! the marriage, it’s all for inheritance.” 

lara turns the page over to sophia, and even with her half breaths she can see the clauses: public-facing equal, married by 30 years of age, inheritance. 

all of it is slowly piecing together. the urgency for the divorce, the sudden interest in sophia’s career. the manipulation and coercion of marriage was all to guarantee the inheritance of his father’s net worth. eventually he would secure his position to acquire his father’s businesses. 

how could sophia be so stupid?

all because of a stupid clause that sophia signed when she was still a bright-eyed actress hoping to land her first big role in hollywood. only because she didn’t hire a lawyer to read the fine print of all the clauses in her contract. 

it had cost her autonomy and the disrepair of her relationship with you. and if sophia had to guess, he was going to drag anna into it too. some sick leverage to get this marriage on the fast-track to secure his position.

all because she signed to a slimy acting agency run by thomas’ father. and all because thomas got his hands on her acting contract.

“i’m going to strangle him lara.” sophia gets out her phone, taking photos of the contract. every single photo or page in the manila folder all documented now in her phone.

“sophie, let’s be smart about this okay?” lara starts, already taking photos of her own as a backup. “we need a way out, we have to do this smart and quick.” 

sophia nods.

“you have dirt on him right now, this contract, the coercion of marriage, his scandals. you know all about it.”

lara continues, thinking about how to use this to their advantage.

sophia continues to read over the inheritance, all of it is so obvious, thomas is after his dad’s assets. in an attempt to secure his position over his brother. he’s using sophia as a chess piece for his plan to take over. a coup.

“leak it.”

lara speaks up suddenly. her eyes are deep in thought, she keeps flipping through all the evidence. “leak it anonymously.”

“what?” sophia stops, confusion in her eyes as she looks at lara.

“make it an exposé, if his dad found out that thomas never went to rehab. and spent his money partying. dragging one of the biggest stars of hollywood into a coercive marriage. that would spell the end for thomas moore. he’d never be let out of his dad’s grasp again.”

lara begins texting people in her phone, a plan to drop pieces of evidence all over the next couple of days. a sudden exposé piece would send thomas into hiding. 

“what if it backfires, lara? i can’t lose her or anna.” sophia panics, still worried about how this will all blow up in her face.

“we have a way out.” lara is confident, a large smile on her face, even if it was the last thing she could do, she would help sophia no matter what. “he’s tormented you for years sophie, the manipulation, the controlling. he took you away from her. he did this.” 

lara points at the pictures, the acting contract.

“we’re going to make him suffer. you tell me to leak it and i’ll spread it like wildfire, okay sophie?”

sophia nods firmly, and breathes out for the first time. a breath of relief.

a breath of freedom.

--

you’re dressed more properly today, in a way it’s to not feel so awful all the time. the long walks along the beach have been helping keep your feelings in tact.

it’s been several divorce settlement meetings and you’ve been realizing just how complex sophia’s life is. between all the assets and bank accounts, and royalties from her acting career. 

you’ve been feeling conflicted, a lost sense of what it means to be a partner to her. or at least what it meant before. 

you weren’t there when she made these accomplishments and you can’t understand why you still want to be in her life. 

it’s a feeling that’s haunted you since the moment she disappeared from your life. maybe there’s something you lacked for her to turn to someone else.

maybe you pushed her into the arms of that man.

sometimes you dream about him, about him burning your ranch down. or standing outside your ranch watching you as you work. his nasty grin on full display. 

you usually wake up in cold sweat and reach out for sophia, trying to protect her. but she’s never there. and reality sinks in all over again.

there were days you could barely get out to do the daily chores, sluggish movement as you tried mending your broken heart a second time. 

it’s no use though, you were used and replaced by someone who probably had more wealth than you could imagine.

so you sit a little clouded by your own thoughts, going through these meetings as robotically as possible.

limiting as much as you could, to remove the emotions out of these meetings. you need this divorce to be done, to never return or hear of sophia again.

sophia wasn’t coping much better, after learning about thomas’ motives to move forward with this divorce. it’s been hard for her to focus at the task at hand. 

just yesterday she burned her hand trying to cook breakfast for her and anna. it reminded her how much of her life was in pain. the controlled aspect of her public image made her want to vomit.

and she’s sat beside you, both of you trying to answer the mediators questions. a hurdle that both of you are struggling with. 

throughout the questioning, at multiple times, the lawyers have asked for a break to reconvene with more focus. 

all it has done is caused more stilled awkwardness between you and sophia. silently sitting together, but unable to look at each other.

it feels like detention, that you both were “willingly” sat in.

and then suddenly, like a glass falling off a countertop, sarah begins again.

“let’s discuss custody and visitation rights…” sarah reads out to the pair. 

her counterpart taking a sip of his cold coffee, a displeased frown on his face.

“on page six, the primary custodial rights of the minor child, would still be under miss laforteza’s legal guardianship until the child reaches 18 years old. in which they are legally an adult. currently, with non-disclosure terms applying to the identity of the other parent…” sarah continues reading down the page.

sophia eyes sharpen again.

“i’m sorry–what did you say?” you snap out of your haze. 

“wait–sarah, wait…what?” sophia stands up straighter, hand immediately reaching out for the paper, rapidly flying to page six. eyes furious as she searches for the words.

“whose child?” you ask sarah, also grabbing onto the paper again.

what the hell?

“this wasn’t…this wasn’t in the draft i sent in.” sophia drops the paper back down. it’s there, in the fine print of the divorce papers. 

“you have a child?” the way you ask is chilly, like you’ve audibly flinched back. electrified adrenaline shooting through you.

“give us a minute…” the lawyers both quickly review their materials. rapid typing from sarah’s counterpart and sarah looks confused as well, rereading the section that she just read aloud.

sophia’s voice is stuck in her throat, a sound coming out but it cracks in the end. she watches you scoot back, chair moving along with you.

“i was–i promise i was going to tell you about her, i was going to–” sophia reaches out, hand trying to grab yours. 

but you flinch back, hand flying behind you, shock and the slow rise of anger coming back.

the exact anger you felt when you found out about thomas.

“fuck. you–you always do this sophia. you always fucking do this.” you step back, chair hitting the marbled floor. 

and both lawyers stand up. immediately packing their stuff up. 

“you never tell me what’s going on. seriously a child? a fucking child?”

sophia gets up out of her seat. 

“is it even mine?” you bite out angrily, a suddenly thought making its sickly appearance. you couldn’t stand the idea that sophia would have anyone else’s kid. 

“don't do that! of course she’s yours. i’m not some–it’s yours okay.” the pain is sharp in your heart. you hate that you’re always the last to hear about anything. 

so a small part of you wants to hurt back. how you want her to feel an ounce of your pain.

“how are you so sure it’s mine?” the pain’s making you say things you would never say to sophia. “it could be your fiancé’s, you know?”

sophia’s hand flies out, slapping you across the face. angry tears at the accusation. the sound echoing against the walls. 

your head stays stuck, realizing how much the words hurt her, but really they hurt you too.

“i would never. never! never raise that bastard’s child.” sophia says it with finality. the kind that shuts you up and lets you know not to press further. “so don’t you dare insinuate…”

the lawyers are quick to leave, sending sophia a look that expresses that they’ll talk later. 

you’re glad because you’d rather have this conversation in private.

you finally sit back down, pulling the fallen chair up. and with that, sophia sits down too. 

both of you facing each other for the first time in a long time. but she can’t hold your gaze, repeatedly looking away to hide the anguish that’s creeping up.

she’s trying to wipe away her tears, not wanting to show how your words tore through her. and you’ve sunken into the chair, the exhaustion released from your shoulders.

it smacks you again, the reality of your life.

“we have a daughter?” you ask, feeling the anger being drowned out by the fact that you have a kid now.

“we do.” sophia cries a bit, this wasn’t how she wanted to introduce anna to you. and she certainly didn’t plan it either.

sophia could only think of one person who would try and ruin her like this. the same man that tormented her life, forced her to get this divorce. pulled her abruptly from you, only to carry your child all alone.

both of you continue to sit, waiting for the other to speak up. and it’s killer, the silence that’s waiting.

so you speak up first.

“is she healthy? i know my dad had some issues when he was a kid. and my mom too–” you begin to ramble, spilling all your worries.

“she’s healthy, don’t worry.” and sophia cracks a small smile when you do too. 

“that’s really good, yeah that’s good. um…can i see her?” 

you ask, realizing all that you ever wanted with sophia was actualized, not just a dream that you kept to yourself. in the most sick way, you now have a child.

its not the full dream of having a big family with sophia, but you have a daughter.

more specifically, you have a daughter with sophia. 

with tears in her eyes, sophia agrees to have you come over. to see the young toddler that had your eyes and sophia’s temperament. 

you felt like a part of you had returned, some part of you wasn’t a complete fuckup of your own life.

and sophia spent hours, talking about anna. every detail she thought she could share, she did. how much she enjoyed eating grapes and would scream at the top of her lungs for fun. sophia even showed you photos of her.

she looked happy, a bright wide smile in each photo. when sophia talked about the pregnancy, you felt like you could cry. all the milestones that you missed. especially when you realized sophia went through it alone, none of thomas’ support or presence. 

it hurt to hear how painful it all was for sophia, the hormone changes in her body. the way she felt about herself after the delivery. you wanted to be by her side, a shoulder to cry on as you both navigated having a child together.

so you both cried, you cried asking about her, and she cried listening to you describe how it feels to hear this all for the first time. 

how you dreamed of having a family with her. all along it was there, and she wanted the exact same.

as the night rose, you realized how late it had become. making plans to see anna the next afternoon.

before she left, sophia handed you a photo of anna as a keepsake.

the drive was somber, all you could do was replay the long conversation you had with sophia. there were bits and pieces that stuck with you, how proudly she spoke about having your child. how anna had the mischievous side of you. and the clever side of sophia.

you listened to her talk and even ordered room service for you two.

it was…nice.

almost like you two hadn’t torn each other to shreds many years ago.

it felt familiar, in a distant kind of way. 

you still want to hide how happy you were when sophia agreed to stay for dinner. she doesn’t deserve to know that. your heart was still in pieces, and one dinner wouldn’t change that fact.

but as you drifted off, you tried to wipe the smile off your face. 

truth is, you fail. you fail miserably.

--

this wasn’t how you planned on meeting your firstborn. you hoped it would be when she was born, still crying and wailing at the first introduction to the world. in a swaddle and tiny hands that would try to thrash around.

but instead you stood outside a large metal gate. a large bag in hand as you tried calming your nerves. 

you buzzed yourself in with the gate code, taking a slow look at the house that was supposedly sophia’s.

perfectly shaped hedges and large bed for flowers out front. large slabs of stone crossing the grass. you step forward towards the house. still a little weary of yourself.

maybe you have the wrong house.

you tuck your hat a little lower, feeling a bit self-conscious as you walk forward. cowboy boots clicking against the large slab stones. eventually you knock on the huge square door.

it opens into what could be described in architectural digest’s showroom mansions. large abstract paintings pinned on the walls. a flowing screen of water trickling. an ornate chandelier hanging high up.

there’s a quietness about this life. a different setting but the familiar quiet of living on a ranch. 

you continue to walk through the front, walking into a long extended room. seeing a large red conversation pit in front of you, a rather unusual vase shadowed by flowers placed in the center. 

and to your right is the kitchen, where sophia and another woman stand. both talking to each other animatedly. 

you give a light cough, to which sophia instantly turns to you. eyes going wide when she spots you.

“hi, you’re early.” sophia lets out, she still had another half hour before you were supposed to arrive. 

but instead you stand in her mansion looking as gorgeous as the first day her eyes found yours. 

cowgirl ensemble and her favorite hat of yours to pair.

“didn’t want to be late.” you explain.

lara eventually turns to you, seeing you for the first time. 

all she’s heard about you has been through sophia, and yeah lara means this in the most respectful way possible. 

but she understands why sophia is so crazy about you.

you step closer to them, the familiar clicking of cowboy heels against the floors. you stop on the other side of the counter.

“i really didn’t want to make a bad first impression.” you say placing the bag onto the table. also taking your hat off, placing it on the table.

you look at lara. “and you are?”

“i’m lara, sophia’s bestie.” lara gives a big smile, and you return one too. 

it strikes lara again, how much anna really looks like you. the same eyes that she’s seen when babysitting.

“nice to meet you lara. i’m-” you take off your hat, placing it onto the table, and extending your hand.

“don’t worry, i know and have heard a lot about you.” she gives a knowing smile as she shakes your hand.

sophia rolls her eyes at the smile.

you try looking around for a young toddler, eyes scanning around, but it lands on nothing. 

sophia starts, moving away from the kitchen. “i’ll go get her. stay here.”

“no, let me, you two should catch up.” lara winks at sophia before disappearing into the house. 

and you’re again, left with sophia.

“so i uh, went out and bought some toys.” you start, rummaging through your bag. “but i realized i don’t know what she’d like…so i kind of bought everything.”

you scratch your head a bit. realizing how dumb you looked with a toy from each aisle of the store.

sophia stares at the gesture fondly, looking at all the dolls and books you bought. enough to fill an entire shelf. 

it’s like you’re santa.

“thank you, you really didn’t have to.” sophia rounds the counter, standing close enough for you to inhale her perfume. 

you blink a bit before focusing again.

she sits down in a barstool, and you do the same.

“it’s nothing, i’m happy to.” you say smiling at sophia. you want to reach out and rub her cheek, but the sudden reminder of your reality keeps that urge down.

“how are ya, fia?” you let the nickname drop, you don’t even notice it but she does.

“i’m tired, but i’m happy you’re here.” and sophia means every word of it. 

you try not to let it, but the words blossom in your heart, a familiar kind of bliss from just being around her.

she’s happy to have you in her orbit even in the circumstances. 

you feel the same way, you’re more convinced that there’s more sophia’s not telling you. what other hidden mysterious could she be hiding from you?

“how about you? enjoying california?” sophia asks.

you think about your time here, it’s definitely different from new mexico. there’s more movement around, the beach is really nice. you’ve been swimming most days or taking long walks on the beach.

“it’s really nice out here, i can see why you came.” you didn’t want to make it feel like she chose california over you.

“yeah, it’s a beautiful state.” sophia thinks about how different life is for you back home.

suddenly a voice hits your ears.

“mommy!” a young girl squirms in lara’s arms. trying her best to reach sophia. and with quick steps, sophia eventually grabs a hold of anna. 

you watch the interaction in slow motion, your shoulders tensing when you realize this is real.

you spent the whole car ride over shaking your foot or biting your nail. to say you were excited and nervous is an understatement.

as sophia’s cuddling her a bit, the toddler’s eyes spot you. and she watches you, a sudden interest in your face.

you’re looking at your own daughter. and God, she reminds you of sophia when you were both younger. she’s got sophia’s long hair, but she has your eyes. 

she has your eyes.

it brings tears to your eyes, and you nearly have to step away so you can cry. but instead anna puts her arms out begging you to hold her.

and you do, with shaky arms. she sits comfortably on your side, looking up at you. small strong hands that pull at your shirt.

“hi there.” you say softly. and lara’s standing there taking photos of you three. sophia’s hands are shaking too. scared to let this moment disappear from her grasp.

anna continues exploring you, hand reaching up to pull at your face. letting your skin snap back when she lets go.

“mama!”

anna slaps her hands against your chest, happily clapping to herself and sophia gasps. her smart girl recognized you, from all the photos and stories she’s told her.

“mama? yeah, i’m your mama.” you cry out, tears falling down your face. you wipe them away with your sleeve. anna seeing you cry makes her cry too. 

“no no, please don’t cry, these are happy tears.” you try to wipe away your daughter’s tears.

lips still trembling as you held her tighter. she stops crying when you wipe her tears away too. leaning into you with a soft smile on her face.

“oh my God. this is really cute, but i have to go. it was lovely meeting you, let’s all have brunch sometime soon!” lara whispers to you, grabbing her purse and giving a hug to sophia before leaving.

“lovely to meet you too, lara.” you wave to her, and anna waves too. her hand shaking as she waves away.

“sophia i–she’s real.” you gasp, feeling the toddler mess with the pockets of your shirt.

“she is. want to play with her while i make her a snack?” sophia smiles fondly at you holding onto anna’s hand.

“yeah of course.” 

so you set the toddler down. grabbing each toy that you bought and shaking it in front of her. she seems mildly intrigued by each until you hold out a toy horse in front of her.

she grabs it with interest, immediately trying to bite it, but you pull it away quick enough before she bites down.

instead you show her how to walk the horse on the counter. you start putting other horses down for her. she continues to knock them into each other, much to your dismay.

“she loves horses. i wonder where she got that from?” sophia says teasingly, continuing to place grapes in a small cup. 

“hm, must be you?” you joke back.

you laugh a bit when sophia doesn’t respond. continuing to knock into horses with anna. 

“one time i took her to a carousel and she begged to get on the horse.” sophia continues, and you can imagine the scene. thinking fondly of the two.

“that’s my girl.” you say confidently, “oh i have a gift.” you grab your bag.

taking out a kid’s sized cowboy hat and fitting it onto anna’s head. it’s still too big for her and she gets completely covered by it.

“she’ll grow into it.” you say to sophia, taking it off the kid. the kid laughs a bit at the hat, putting it back on as she continues to play with the horses.

suddenly a thought hits you, and before you can control it, the words come tumbling out. you don’t mean to ask it, at least not in front of anna.

“would you have told me about her?” 

sophia stills, stopping her movements as she look at you, with all the sincerity in her eyes, she answers you.

“yes, i just didn’t want it to come out like that.” she refers to the divorce settlement meetings. “you deserved to know her.”

you nod along, a solemn expression painting the pain of not knowing your own daughter. you wanted to be there for all of it, the good and the bad. 

even for sophia. 

maybe you were still hopelessly in love with her. but now that there’s a child involved, things have shifted.

“i’m sorry for the things i said to you. what i implied, i didn’t mean it.” you say to her. gently adjusting the hat on anna’s head. “i was…angry, but that doesn’t make it okay.”

she takes a minute to absorb your apology, quietly moving through the kitchen.

“thank you, and i’m sorry too for everything.” sophia puts a juice box on the plate.

you also take a second to acknowledge her apology, it’s been hard grappling how sophia truly feels about you. whether she means everything she’s done to you.

for now you’ll accept whatever this is. but in you there’s still a very cautious and injured animal. cowering in fear that if you let her in again, she’ll ruin you. 

you grab anna, walking across the kitchen. putting her into a high chair. she pays it no mind as she continues playing with the plastic horse in her hand.

anna continues to mess with the horse, setting it down when she sees her plate of food. slowly eating it as you and sophia both watched.

“thanks for inviting me over.” you look at her, a genuine smile that refuses to leave. 

“of course.” sophia walks to the fridge, opening the door and scanning for beverages. “want something to drink?”

you walk right up behind her, enough to hover but not enough to touch her. she can feel your body heat radiating off.

“water would be good.” you reach into the fridge, grabbing a bottle and stepping back. sophia’s closes her eyes for a couple seconds. feeling a bit flushed at the sudden closeness. 

almost wishes you never moved away. and she turns to look at you, with something behind those eyes, you can’t quite place.

you want to ask her what’s going on. but then she walks away, back to the stove. you close the fridge, trying to shake off that moment.

you take a sip of water and return back to anna’s side. watching her happily eat some animal crackers. a smile erupting when you make silly faces at her.

anna pulls her arms up, begging you to hold her again. you lift her up and hold her on your hip. moving into the kitchen again, standing right next to sophia.

“mm, the famous laforteza sinigang?” you dip your head down, smelling the delicious soup. a familiar scent wafting into your nose.

smells like home.

“yeah, family recipe.” sophia continues stirring the pot every so often.

“smells good,” you say cheekily, and sophia grabs a spoon, cooling it down for you. and then spoons some to you. “and it tastes even better.”

you grab another spoonful and shovel it into your mouth.

“i’m going to miss your cooking.”

“yeah…want to stay for dinner?” sophia asks.

and its a step out. a step out of her comfort zone, an extending hand hoping that you take it.

she really hopes you take her up on the offer.

“that would be lovely.” you reply back, a small smile on your face when sophia’s eyes light up.

you continue to play with anna throughout the afternoon. she liked crashing horses into each other and running around the sofa. all of which would tire you out.

but she kept giggling and ran, so you had to run after her. eventually she settled for a nap, you tucked her in, a small blanket covering her as she slept on the couch.

“she’s out.” you speak up, getting up from the couch. walking towards sophia, and God. maybe the world is blessing her, because now you’re standing inside her home. 

“dinner is ready?” you ask.

she focuses again, nodding as you walk towards her cabinets. grabbing two bowls and utensils, passing them to sophia. 

she fills the bowls with some rice, passing them back to you. you set them on the dinner table, sophia grabs her small pot of sinigang. placing it to the next of you, you grab her plate, filling it with the delicious soup, doing the same for you.

“shall we say grace?” sophia began, sliding her hand over and you took it. 

a spark of electricity at the slight touch, you instantly flinch back a bit. before sliding your hand into hers again.

“dear heavenly father, we thank you for the food that we are about to eat. we ask that you would look protect us and guide us along your path. in jesus’ name, amen.”

“amen.” you say quietly, removing your hand. albeit a bit too quickly for sophia’s liking.

as you begin eating sophia’s sinigang, you think about what it would mean to be in anna’s life. how you could be an active parent despite living in a different state. 

it doesn’t seem feasible, having to travel back and forth to visit anna. and with a lack of reason to stay in new mexico, you suddenly erupt with an idea.

“i’m going to move here.” you say calmly, and sophia stops her spoon. lifting her head to look at you. 

“you’re moving here? like hollywood?” she asks, a little shocked at the sudden interest. 

as far as sophia could remember, new mexico was your home and you were content to live the rest of your life on that ranch.

“not hollywood per se, but definitely close by.” you gesture around, feeling your resolve continue to harden. 

“wow, this is a big move. what uh made you decide that?” sophia squirms in her seat a bit, watching you with purpose. a very secret part of her hopes you say it’s because of her and anna.

“i want to be in anna’s life, actively. traveling back and forth would be too difficult.” you look towards your daughter. who is still happily turning and twisting her horse. a delighted smile on her face.

sophia takes her time to reply, taking another sip of soup before leaning back in her chair. hands shuffling as she thinks of a thoughtful response.

“what about charlie? the horses? the chickens?” sophia asks.

she’s elated to hear that you want to be in anna’s life. it’s more than what she asked for, and to be a consistent part of anna’s life would be terrific. 

“i’m planning on buying a ranch out here. i’ll bring charlie, the horses, everything.” you explain. 

it was an idea that popped into your head earlier, a realization that you wanted your life near anna…and sophia. to still have your lifestyle, but be able to visit often and go out to the beach.

“you sure?” sophia continues to eat her food, and you return back to your bowl. feeling a sense of purpose surging through you, instead of aimless days without a direction, you could be a present parent.

“yeah, i’ve decided. and you know me, once i’ve decided it’s set in stone.” you give her a big grin, looking at her briefly. her eyes searching for something deeper, when a grin also appears on her face.

“well then, if your heart is set on it, then no one can stop you.” she explains.

“i’m going to be a cowgirl out here in california, who would have thought?” you grin continues to expand.

sophia rolls her eyes at that, but she can’t deny that deep down she’d love for you to be closer to her.

“don’t go too crazy now.” sophia comments, filling your empty plate with more soup, to which you happily eat more of. nearly emptying the bowl in less than thirty seconds.

to which she offers another filling.

“do they have rodeos out here? we should take anna when she gets older.” you comment. 

sophia doesn’t mistake the use of ‘we’ when you asked.

“yes, there’s some big ones out here, you’d be surprised.” she says, standing up to pick anna out of her high chair.

“hi cutie, want to sit with us?” sophia walks back over, anna perched on her lap when she sits back down. immediately her baby hands are trying to grab sophia’s bowl of food. hunger in her eyes.

“well, she’s definitely yours.” sophia nods at her kid, still trying to reach her small arms for the bowl, frustrated when sophia sits back. “your mom told me you used to do that as a baby. even threw a couple tantrums.”

sophia giggles to herself, seeing you fluster, the embarrassment rising your neck.

“whatever…” you drag out. a definitely big smile still plastered on your face as you watched your daughter try to struggle out of sophia’s grasp.

you think you could get used to this life, a life with anna and sophia.

‐‐

you continue to toss the keys in your hand as you hum along to a song you heard on the radio. the day has been long gone, and now the night is coming to a close too. after spending nearly all afternoon and dinner with sophia and anna, you’ve come to a couple conclusions.

you were definitely still in love with sophia, even if the world were to flip upside down tomorrow, those feelings would never dim.

you didn’t want a divorce, not now, not yesterday, not tomorrow.

you were going to be the best parent you could be.

it wasn’t something that you were happy to announce, considering sophia still had her fiancé. the same one that she conveniently doesn’t talk about. and honestly you aren’t too sure why.

you both have skirted the conversation about him in her life. as far as you knew, that was a person she willingly agreed to marry, she had no reason to state otherwise. but she still kept your kid?

that made everything more confusing. the lack of thomas in her life. every meeting that’s been had, every inch of sophia’s life wouldn’t lead one to believe that she’s happily engaged.

there are no photos of him in her home, even when you went poking in her bathroom, there was no sign of someone else that lived here. it’s unsettling…

you don’t know how to bring it up to her.

like hey, so what about your fiancé that you happen to be cheating on me with, but also you’re technically cheating on him with me?

there was something still lost in the grand picture, he didn’t fit into sophia or anna’s life. something’s not right, and you need to get to the bottom of it, before you lose your wife for good.

these thoughts continue to consume you, so much so you barely recognize the voice that’s calling out to you from the hotel lounge.

“hey neighbor!” and in front of you is manon, wide smile and a long dress to match. you quickly stop yourself before crashing into her. taking a step back before giving her a smile too.

“hey, how have you been?” you ask, subtly noticing the get-up. clearly she’s had a night out, a fancy one.

“i’m okay, came back from a failed date.” she points at herself, a small clutch in hand and sparkly earrings that dangle under her long curly hair.

“ouch, his fault?” you ask. both of you walk towards the bar, pulling her chair out and pushing her in. as you sit next to her.

“her fault, actually.” manon says confidently. you flag a bartender down to order two martinis. “she kept talking about herself all night, didn’t ask me a single question.”

you wince a bit, feeling sympathetic towards manon’s shitty night. the bartender slides over the drinks and you immediately take a sip.

“sorry for assuming, and that’s got to suck. you even dressed up so nicely!” you explain, taking a sip and listening to manon continue to complain.

“no harm no foul, most people don’t know i date women.” she explains, placing her clutch onto the bar counter. “and look! i even pulled my favorite dress out.”

she points at herself, and you can’t deny, it does look very good on her. form fitting and silver accents along the neckline. anyone would struggle to keep their eyes off her on a date.

“sorry to hear that, she wasn’t worth your time.” you continue to sip on your drink as she replays the story to you. telling you how it was doomed from the start, the lack of chivalry, the messy eating, the self-centered monologue, all of which made manon wish she was curled up in her hotel room, watching shitty rom-coms instead.

by then you two have had more than a couple drinks, and you can tell it’s definitely affecting manon more than you. her speech is a little slurred. her eyes are a bit unfocused, and her hands keep reaching out to touch your knee.

you’re not uncomfortable per se, but it definitely strikes you how forward manon is. batting her lashes and listening to you intently talk. almost as if she’s lost in a vision of you.

“alright, clearly you’ve had your fill. let’s get you to your room.” you grab a dizzy manon out of her chair, tucking her clutch under your arm. instantly she pulls all her weight onto you, you brace yourself, almost tipping over.

“sorry, had a bit too much.” manon giggles to herself, and you try your best to counter the weight. having her lean into your arms as you both walk away from the bar. slow steps as she continues to giggle to herself. 

you don’t notice it, not with how hard you’re trying to keep manon upright. the weight of her body trying to make you tip over.

but sophia’s here. she’s here and she’s shaking. in her hand is the cowboy hat you left in her house. 

she had found it when cleaning up the kitchen, hoping to see you again. so she drove over, a smile all over her face as she sang all the songs on the radio.

but now, no. no she’s furious. there’s an unnamed woman hanging off your arm. clearly interested with the way she’s hanging onto you like she was oh so weak.

fucking bullshit.

sophia’s pulled that move on you long before this woman even breathed in your direction. she’s gripping onto your cowboy hat with jealousy brimming in her heart.

and she might just snap. she’s going to snap this woman in half if she doesn’t get her hands off her wife. 

you are none the wiser, walking manon into the elevator and selecting the top floor. stepping back and begging the elevator to fly up, the doors are closing when suddenly in steps another woman.

sophia.

her eyes are filled with rage as she stares at manon next to you. 

“sophia! what are you doing here?”

you’re more than shocked to see her, she’s never come to visit you unless it was to discuss the divorce. and here she was standing in an elevator with you and a drunk manon going up to the top floor.

she stops her glaring long enough to focus on you. hat in hand that she slides back onto your head. “you left this. at my place.” 

she goes back to glaring at the other woman. and manon’s seeming to get the hint, even in her drunk state. pulling away from your arm a bit. and sophia can see it in her eyes, the recognition of her face. she knows exactly who sophia laforteza is.

“and who might you be?” sophia asks, it’s neither friendly not mean. but it’s definitely not kind. 

“i’m manon, living next door.” she gestures to you, eyes more alert as sophia tries to subtly put distance between you two. stepping in far enough that you back into your corner.

“i see.” sophia eyes her more, satisfied that the woman’s stepped away from you. and even more satisfied that her hand is off of you.

the elevator can’t go fast enough with the tense energy in the air. sophia takes a moment to situate herself, happy to have kept her away.

the elevator dings and all three of you walk out. and manon’s really drunk, because she nearly trips over herself, almost falling on the floor.

you reach out quickly, scooping her up before she fell. and with a few adjustments she’s back onto her feet.

“are you okay?” you ask, manon nods a bit trying her best to stabilize herself.

and sophia, well she’s watching like a hawk. ready to swoop in the second manon gets too close.

you walk manon to her room quickly, opening the door and setting her down on a chair. and sophia’s not exactly happy at the sight. it should be her being taken home by you, you keeping her upright if she was too wobbly. this kind of chivalry was supposed to be reserved for her. 

she shakes her head unhappily.

and with a quick nod from manon that she was all good, you bid her goodnight, walking away with sophia in tow. 

sophia gives manon a quick look over her shoulder before the door closed. and walks right after you, all the way into your hotel room. she thinks long and hard, about the next words she’s going to say to you, because really…these emotions have been erupting in her all day.

she walks in after you, closing the door behind her.

but she settles on these next words carefully, eyes wild and hair even wilder. 

“are you fucking her?” sophia enunciates every syllable, she always did this whenever she got serious. wanted to make it obvious what she’s asking, no chance for you to stand there looking confused. 

she hates when you look at her like you’re confused.

your eyes nearly jump out of your skull, you immediately let out a sharp gasp.

“no, of course not!” you reply, feeling a little upset at the question. 

“not that it’s any of your business.” 

it hits both of you like a train when you say it. in truth, you want it to hurt, you want sophia to tell you everything was one big mistake. want her to snap out of it, want her to pull you in by the belt of your pants. to fuck you like you meant something.

but you want it to sting, she doesn’t have the right. doesn’t have the ability to dictate what you are to her, not with him still in the picture. you’re digging for more, for her to explain his unusual place in her life. 

“say that again.” 

she dares you, eyes hard like steel. 

you step close enough to breathe it in her face, she doesn’t step back, body tight like a rubberband. and you think if you breathe in the wrong, maybe right, direction, she’ll blow up.

“i said…it’s none of your business.” you hold your own, standing firmly. she stares at you, listening to you try to defend yourself . “it’s none of your business. who i fuck. who i kiss. who i touch.”

you continue to corner her a bit, and she’s getting angrier by the second, you know in a second she’d be all over you like a predator, she has that gaze.

“oh! you must be out of your depth here.” she pushes you with a light laugh at the end of sentence. grabbing you by your shirt, hand clenched to the point her knuckles turn white. you feel like you’ll snap, either your shirt or you first, you don’t know. “it is my Goddamn business.”

she snarls the words out, an anger thats fueled by jealousy and the tense sexual tension that always lingers when you two are too close. 

“funny how you think i’d let you touch someone else, with what’s supposed to be mine.”

she pushes you, enough to make you stumble a bit, your hat falling onto the ground. then grabbing onto you again, pulling you straight into the bedroom. each step like a sentence to the dungeon, but you’re more than happy to be locked here. with all her attention and anger directed at you.

“you want to play dumb? fine. let me remind me who you belong to.” 

you fall backwards onto the mattress, ready to push her under you, an undercurrent of wanting to control the pace nearly making you go tunnel vision. but sophia’s got her mind set. eyes ablaze as she pulls your belt out of your jeans. holding your body down with her hips. she stares at you angrily, a need to remind you where you are. 

under her. 

she ties your hands in a quick fashion, pulling the belt until there’s tension, keeping your hands above your head. 

you try pulling against the bedpost, but it doesn’t give.

she pushes your shirt up, until she can scratch your stomach with her nails, then she leans down, hair in beautiful waves falling around you, until all you can breathe and see is her.

she pushes your pants down a bit, not enough to take it off, but enough to let the pressure of your pants alleviate. and then she stops midway. your pants are lifted off your hips but not enough to move anywhere else.

“either you tell me who this belongs to.” she snaps the pants back onto your skin. hand immediately back on you, pressed against you, not enough to move, but with enough to make you want to buck your hips. “or i leave you here. your choice.” 

she says it in that tone, the one that lets you know there’s no other choice, not if you still want to be in her good graces. 

“yours fia, i swear.” you groan a bit, trying to find some pressure to alleviate the ever present problem in your pants. “all of me belongs to you.”

she smiles big, in that smile that lets you know she’s won, and she’s going to be rewarded heavily for it.

“good answer baby.” she taps your cheek a bit, liking the way you keep trying to touch her, like you deserved to after pulling that with her. 

“i would say you kept up a good fight,” she takes a long lick over your stomach, feeling it tense under her touch, “but we know you’ll end up like putty in my hands.”

she’s reeling in her win, a cocky grin that won’t leave her face. you nearly whimper at the contact, she’s barely touched you and you’re taut, trying to arch into her, for some contact at the very least.

“please fia, let me touch you.” you whine again, trying your best to get out of your restraints. its driving you mad how you can’t touch her. can’t feel her the way you want.

“not tonight. not until i'm satisfied.” she leans back, unbuckling your pants and staring down at you, like she’s caught her prey in a trap. 

you continue to try and move your hips, like a caught animal trying so desperately to be released, but it’s no use. not when she’s got you finally where she wants you. 

“fuck fia, please, need to touch you.” you try to beg, but it only spurs her on, oh how the mighty have fallen. she shakes her head, giving you a kiss on the cheek before climbing off of you, pulling herself off the bed.

she takes her time, tonight she’s in charge, and she’ll take everything she can get. especially with the way you’re trying so hard to watch her, head trying to look at her despite the restraints holding you in place. it drives her insane, knowing she still has that much of an effect on you, tracking all of her movements without trying to miss a single second. 

she can feel herself getting hot by how hard you’re staring at her. a slight sheen on sweat on the back of her neck. you wish you could just rip these restraints off you, to show her who she belonged too. but a deep part of you is just as enticed by this side of her. 

desire pooling in your lower stomach and you nearly jump when she takes off your shoes, sliding them off quickly. you don’t even care what she does, as long as she’s touching you, you’re more than okay with that. 

her hands slide up along your pants, and really you feel like a horny teenager being touched for the first time. the way she intentionally drags it out, slow enough to keep you engaged but not enough to give you relief. 

“fia, please.” you beg again, and again. she swears she’s never heard you so desperate, at the mercy of her control. she could get used to this. and soon enough, she’s pulling your pants and boxers off, enough to alleviate the pressure that’s been confining your lower half.

“please what?” she says with anticipation in her eyes, she’s never seen you so out of control. so much want to let her do whatever she wants. it makes her pride swell.

“please, touch me.” you moan out, and you’re so tightly wound that it almost feels like you’re in pain. pain of not having her all over you. desperate and whining for attention.

she likes the sound of that. pulling herself forward, settling for sitting on top you. light touches dancing on your hip. not close enough to where you truly want her, but a relief that she is even touching you at all. the hard exterior that you’ve put up over the years is crumbling, and of course is being unraveled by her.

she continues her light touches until she gets lower, already sensitive to the touch, trying your best to get some movement against her hand. but she holds still, liking the way you’re completely at her will.

then she spits in her hand, enough to get your cock wet, spreading it all over. you moan at the contact, letting yourself relax again, getting that much needed relief after all.

sophia’s got other plans in mind.

“so, you let anyone touch you?” she says, continuing to stroke you up and down, letting the build up confuse your brain, “do you, slut?” 

you’ve never heard sophia talk like this before, the way she stares down at you like you’re nothing and everything at the same time. the way she stops her hand when you don’t respond.

“answer me.” it’s not particularly loud, but it makes you want to shrink. 

“n-no, i don’t.” you whimper a bit, trying to buck your hips again, to which she completely lets go of you. a growing dissatisfaction in her eyes. 

“you don’t, slut? so what was that back there?” she growls out. 

“i-i i really-she was drunk. i was helping her back. please sophia, please touch me.” you beg, trying to move your legs and by now sophia’s getting irritated. 

“don’t let that happen again.” sophia goes back to stroking you again, and you nearly flinch at the contact, it was so sudden and gentle that you wanted to chase after it.

“i won’t, i promise! please faster.” you continue to beg, head thrown back in pleasure as she continues to give you a growing pleasure in your stomach. she gives you a quick kiss on the lips, a reward for the correct answer.

“my little slut will get what she wants.” sophia says it out loud, but mostly it’s for herself. a direct and open claim of you. you’ve never been so worked up before, all this teasing and lack of control is making every sense more heightened.

“yes, please, fuck.” you moan out everytime she drags her hand up the top, a delicious pressure that has you leaking out pre-cum. you’re breathing heavy, head to one side as you try to fight the growing orgasm that’s closing in on you. the feeling of sophia all over you again has you unraveling earlier than you were expecting. “i’m your slut.”

you don’t even know what you’re saying anymore, just begging for a release, one that sophia will happily grant you if you answer this next question correctly. she speeds up her movements, you continue to let out begging words at her mercy. 

“so, who’s is this?” she makes it a point to squeeze you suddenly, drawing a gasp and some more pre-cum flowing from the head. the increased pace is making you want to pass out, and all you can feel is the mounting orgasm that will explode soon.

“fuck, yours, i swear to God, it’s yours, i’m yours.” you ramble a bit, trying so very desperately to chase after your own release, it’s a beautiful sight to sophia. just a little more and she has you begging for a single touch.

she doesn’t mistake how you try to bite at something, anything to contain the inevitable orgasm. you bite into the closest thing you have which is a small pillow to your right. and your body tenses like it usually does, a tightness in your stomach and you try and push into her hand. 

“fuck, sophia, please, don’t stop.” you continue to push into her hand, and she can feel herself drooling at the sight, wiping it away with the back of her other hand. and like a drawn bow, the arrow is released.

“fuck oh God, fia. fuck, i’m cumming.”

you shake a bit as you cum, legs shaking and torso taut, arching off the bed, the cum spilling out in streams. 

all landing on your abdomen. 

but sophia doesn’t stop, she continues to stroke you through the orgasm, your body convulsing at the motion, it drives you insane. you can feel your body feeling overloaded with stimulation. 

“fuck-sophia, please,” you try to gain some control, the continuous stroking making you cum more than you’ve ever cum before. “give-give me a second.”

she gives you a few more strokes before letting go, you’re breathing hard, sweat glistening under the lights, and God, sophia swears she’ll never let you walk away from her again. as she watches you try to get your focus back. instead, she pulls herself on top of you, resting herself right on top of your spent cock.

she pulls her dress up, just above her hips, dragging herself on top of your cock, a slow rocking motion against you, and you let out a gasp at the contact again. your brain is fuzzy and barely recovered when she starts moving. 

she has every intent of making this as pleasurable for herself.

you can feel it, the lack of panties in the way. she came all the way here for one thing only, it only brings you faster to attention, the blood flowing straight to your cock once more.

she continues to ride the underside of your cock, small moans and quick breaths pulling from that gorgeous throat of hers. 

you’re mesmerized, eyes in a trance, loving the way she’s using you for her own pleasure. to chase after her own orgasm. you try pulling at the restraints again, trying to desperately to touch her. 

she smiles through all of it, enjoying you trying so hard to get your hands out of your belt. she smells sweet, and the mixed smell of everything is driving you insane.

“fia, please, let me touch you.” you’re pleading with her, barely able to get out a single word without pulling again. and she finds it insanely hot, how you can’t even focus on anything. eyes flying around, trying to pull yourself free, trying to watch her at the same time, trying so very hard.

she swears she can cum just from watching you, her continuous rocking motion making her approach her own orgasm. it’s the delicious pressure on her clit that makes her stay still. wants to see you continue to beg, wants that torture to ruin you. 

until all you know and want is her.

“mm, maybe if you’re good i’ll let you.” sophia returns back to riding herself on top of you, leaning down to pepper kisses along your abs. a reminder that she has every right to touch you anywhere. it’s bringing you to your own orgasm too. and in a deft motion, she pulls herself back, seeing your cock angry red, trying to jump at the loss of contact. 

she smirks at that, slowly lifting her hips to slid it near her hole. the tip just barely prodding the entrance, and with a slow controlled movement, she sinks down onto you, inch by inch, she takes her time. enjoying the delicious stretch, her hands scratching your stomach, where just seconds ago she had left kisses. each lipstick mark like a claim of possession.

“you look so good like this,” she drags a singular nail around, continuing to slowly lift her hips again, and rocking back down. “such a good little slut for me.” 

“fia, fia, fia.” you chant her name like a mantra. caught under her spell and wanting nothing more than to spill everything inside of her. “fuck, i’m close.”

“already?” sophia smirks, and really she’s teasing you. she knows how wound up you are, how sensitive you are after your first orgasm, one slight clench and you would spill inside of her. 

so she tests you, giving you a clench that has your eyes prickling with tears. you can barely contain yourself, twitching wildly at the sudden pressure. wanting so badly to touch her, any part of her. 

she leans in close, giving you another squeeze that has you convulsing once more.

“fia, please, i’m so close.” you whine out. 

she’s on cloud 9 right now, clenching again and then you’re spilling inside of her. loud pants and whines ripping through your already dry throat. cumming with every bit of energy that you have within you. 

she leans close again, kissing you wildly through your orgasm. hair clenched in between her fingers. you’re letting out pretty sounds out of your mouth through each kiss. still trying so hard to pull against the leather belt. tears and cum spilling out of you. and sophia thinks you look glorious like this under her.

you eventually feel the ebbs of your orgasm dying out, sophia still wrapped around you, warm heat that is making you lightheaded.

“Jesus Christ, fia. i’ve never cum that hard.” you get out in between gasps, eyes closed and trying your best to calm your heart. it’s beating faster than you’ve ever felt it, and if you weren’t so spent you would realize sophia’s chasing after her own orgasm. using her fingers to bring her to her own orgasm, with your cock still nestled inside. 

“mm, fuck, that’s good, stay inside.” she whines a bit, continuing to rub herself, rocking herself against you, and really you can’t take it anymore, nearly losing yourself in the throes of passion, almost blacking out. but the sensation keeps you close, the persistent tension against the belt.

“fuck!” she comes tumbling down, orgasm causing her to clench around you, shaking on top of you and then she falls on top of you. cock still very much inside of her as she continues to cum. you try your best to give her kisses, peppering her cheek with them as she’s spent too. heavy breathing, chest to chest, and your eyes are bleary. 

sophia’s the first to move, pushing herself up, enough to have both of her arms holding her up on top of you. her eyes are so filled with emotion, the same kind of emotion she held in her eyes when she stood across from you on that altar, under God, and with everyone in the church. 

she wants to cry, everything’s been so emotional, how she had yearned for you for years. regretting ever leaving you, carried your child and stood by everything that she did in hopes that you two would return to each other. when everything isn’t as messy as it once was. 

just two girls trying to be with each other.

like both of you intended. and by no means is this meant to save everything between you, but for now, for this very moment where your two souls are connected like puzzle pieces, she’ll allow herself this relief. 

in this moment you were hers and she was yours, through and through. 

so she dips back down, giving you a kiss that’s pouring every emotion she can possibly muster up, every ounce of grief, pain, love, and yearning born from her love for you. she doesn’t know if it’s enough, but she hopes it means something to you. wet tears hitting your cheeks as she continues to kiss you. trembling lips that are trying to hold back the pain of losing you, over and over again.

“fia?” you ask her, watching the way the cries continue to slip out, silently crying on top of you. she continues her downpour of tears even when she slips the belt off your hands. your hands immediately on her face again. trying so desperately to stop her tears. so moved by your action that she cries all over again. head sinking to your shoulder.

two naked souls trying to have a conversation with each other. 

you hold her in your hands, keeping her close and softly rubbing her back in comforting circles. and she cries in your arms. wrapping around your torso too. you hold her for the whole night, until her cries turn into soft breaths and her tears have dried. until she’s that girl that you asked to marry when you both were bright-eyed and had dreams of conquering the world.

you hold her close long after she’s fallen asleep. moving to another bed in the suite after you’ve cleaned up the mess between you two. the softness of her eyes hidden under calmness, gently brushing her hair as she continues to sleep through the night. 

you eventually succumb to sleep too. holding her in your arms and hers securely around yours too. in the middle of the night she woke up in a panic, trying desperately to find you, only to realize you were right in front of her. soft snores and a heavy arm laid on her side. 

she kissed each part of your face gently, just to prove to herself you were here. before closing her eyes again. drifting off to a dreamland where your family was all together, laughter and screams filling the air.

‐‐

last night was something.

you didn’t know how to explain it, and you’re sure sophia wouldn’t be able to either.

but last night, you both quickly cross the threshold of just ex partners trying to coparent. crossing the threshold of just trying to coexist in each other’s worlds without crashing into each other. but honestly, did you really think you could just coexist with sophia?

the same woman that stole your heart when she brought you charlie as a small pup from her uncles dog’s litter. the same woman that was your personal nurse when you almost got trampled by a bull and had to be bed-ridden for weeks.

no, you could never simply coexist with her. your lives were intertwined as if by the simple laws of nature. by the simple fact that she was yours and you were hers. through legality and spirituality you two could never completely separate from each other.

and by God’s grace, you were here. running your hands through her hair gently. an ache in your heart and soul to reconnect with the one woman who had spoiled love for you. it drives you mad with want and resentment, wanting for her to be yours again. no need for anyone to interfere.

if last night was any indication of her feelings for you, then you’d be a fool to think she wants anyone other than you. but still everything is so confusing with her, how she refuses to speak about him. you want answers, last night wasn’t just some jealous fueled hook up to you. it has to mean more. it simply has to, or else…did you just give your heart away again?

sophia stirs under your touch, a light smile at the touch, she leans into it, enjoying the way you continue to massage her scalp. it’s relaxing and reminds her of the small acts of affection that you love giving her.

“hi.” you whisper gently, liking the way she hums lightly. eventually placing a hand over your heart, just holding it there. feeling it pulse under her hand. 

“hi, good morning.” you listen to her morning voice, like a songbird it’s tickles your ears. you smile wide before inching closer, placing a quick kiss onto her lips. to which she pulls you in closer, a long and searing kiss filling both of your desires.

“so, last night?” you cock an eyebrow, you weren’t playing any games and you hoped she wasn’t either. instead sophia curls into herself, feeling hot heat rise to her cheeks, dusting them in pink.

“last night…yeah…”sophia drags out. trying her best to hide under the covers again.

“nuh uh, come on, what was all that?” you ask. pulling the covers away, revealing an extremely embarrassed sophia. she instead covers her face with her hands. trying to roll to the other side. “fia?”

“ugh fine, i was…i was jealous okay!” sophia lets go of her hands, dropping them to her side, but still unable to look at you in the eyes. you chuckle a bit, to which she hides herself again. 

this time you don’t bother trying to unveil her.

“yeah i got that,” you roll your eyes in amusement, oh it was clear as day she was jealous. she always was whenever someone got to close to you, or even lingered a little too long. this wasn’t the unusual part, sophia rarely acted on her jealousy. instead letting you respectfully tell the other party that you were taken, because in her head. it was hotter that way. it was hotter for her you to state how you were taken than for her to intervene.

“but seriously fia, you’ve never pulled that. i mean ever.” you continue, dropping the amusement in your voice.

“i know…and it’s so stupid, i just…” she continues to voice out her embarrassment, “everything between us is so rocky, and i needed this. i needed to prove to myself that i’m still who you want.” 

your eyes soften at the sudden vulnerability. instead of embarrassment, sophia lets her hands drop. sitting up straight, half of the duvet still covering her. and you sit up too. 

“fia…what do you mean?” you ask, taking her hand in yours, rubbing small circles on her hand. to calm her through this vulnerable moment, and show that you were here for her.

“i guess, what i’m trying to say is. i still need to know that you want me, and i know it’s selfish. but my God, i still want you, i always have, even when i left, everything in me still wants you.” she rambles out, her other hand moving in a dramatic motion, eyes that are darting everywhere, eventually focusing on you.

“and thomas?” you drop the question. the topic that you both have skirted around since your arrival. especially when you refused to let her explain herself when you left your ranch two years ago. you ask it in a quiet voice, feeling yourself sink at the question. 

you weren’t ready for the answer, but it was now or never.

“thomas, he.” sophia runs her hand through her hair, a long sigh causing her to deflate. “he isn’t my fiancé, at least not willingly. he-his dad, i signed my acting contract with his dad.” she continues to speak, a hidden vulnerability that’s making her shrink herself, head dipped low, almost as if she’s embarrassed. 

you hate the sight of it.

“i signed a contract when i first got here, right after i landed my first big role. everyone wanted to book me, so i signed with his company. and thomas he-he fucking used that contract against me.”

you nod, but there’s a sudden burst of anger growing in your heart. 

“he fucking-he fucking made me get the divorce.”

she dropped the bomb, and you’re leaning back now, shock hitting your system all over again. “sophia, what?” you gasp out, eyes confused and she looks up, watery eyes staring into you.

“he used the contract against me, he knew i had a spat with one of his dad’s buddy directors. i walked out on the filming, my manager made it seem like i had health issues. but i couldn’t stand him, so i left, i left an entire project. everyone was mad, i mean his dad almost threatened to cut me.” sophia continues to talk, a tear falling and you can’t even utter a word.

“you can’t just leave a project unscathed, you could get blacklisted out here. and fucking thomas, he used that against me. he had evidence of me walking out, and he said he would leak it, it would’ve destroyed my career. i was fucking blackmailed.” 

sophia continues to cry, angry tears rolling off her cheeks, much different from the ones she had last night.

“sophia…” you say gently, trying to calm her anger, even though the one inside of you was growing.

“and he fucking asked to get married. said it would fix everything, he would delete the evidence and i would be able to get back to my career. and i said yes, i never should’ve. should’ve just let my career die, but then he got records of us, our marriage. said he would leak that too, fuck.”

you continue to rub small circles, a gentle reminder that you were here, on her side.

“so i came back, to new mexico. i never wanted to ask for a divorce, i swear to you. and when you agreed, my heart shattered. i promised myself i would never love anyone the way i love you. we-we kept on being together, and i fell even harder than i could remember, i still wanted you as much as the first day i met you.” she brings her hand up to hold your head, vulnerable eyes searching for yours.

“i wanted something to keep, even if i had to be miserable for the rest of my life, i wanted to keep something of yours. i wanted to carry your kid. it was the only way i could have you close but keep you safe.” she cries a bit, still holding onto you, trembling fingers dancing along your jaw.

“anna. God gave me anna. God gave me her and i would never trade her for anything. she’s ours and she will always be.” 

“sophia, damn it.” your words are unstable, and you let out a single tear, the pain of thinking about her for two years coming back. all the pain and yearning for each other never subsided. for either side.

“i know, i know baby.” she cries continuing to cradle your jaw, leaving a kiss so soft it felt like a petal had fallen on your face. “it was selfish–but it was all i had. i knew our time was almost up, and i needed something of yours. it’s so selfish, but i could never regret having her.” 

you know in some twisted way what she was expressing. that night, two years ago, you wanted to leave something behind too. something for sophia to remember you by, the willingness to do everything she wanted, to even leave her with the possibility of carrying your child. you wanted it all.

“sophia, i was selfish too.” you confess, remembering how you felt that night, in the midst of the passion you realized how badly you wanted to leave your imprint on her too. “i’ve always, and i mean always, dreamed of having a big family with you. so when you asked me to, you know…i gave into that instinct, because it’s all i ever wanted.”

she stares at you, heart exploding in a thousand directions. she remembered very early on in your marriage, you bringing up wanting kids, maybe as a simple comment. but she couldn’t deny how happy you looked playing with her nieces and nephews.

“you want kids with me?” sophia asks.

“of course i do, fia.” you reply, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “i always did, and i always will. even now i still do.” 

you shift a bit, pulling her into a hug with how stunned she looks at you. another explosion of warmth from her heart. even with a tormented past that held her instincts back, how she aches just the same for you. it drives her mad, you wanted everything she wanted and more.

you rub her back gently, enjoying the way she’s holding you so close. she drops her head onto your shoulders, and you do too. just contently laying on each other.

“so, what do we do?” you ask. you’re hoping sophia won’t go through with the divorce. everything that was shared here, in the bed that you two share, it’s something worth preserving.

she lifts her head off your shoulder, taking both of your hands in hers, a determined look in her eyes. 

“you remember lara?” she asks, a small smile on her eyes.

“of course.” you reply, pulling one of her hands towards you to give a small kiss, just across each knuckle.

“well, we found something, some dirt on thomas.” she starts, reaching for her phone and opening the photo album. “we’re going to leak it to the press, everything, all his partying problems, the coercion of marriage, my acting contract.”

she shows you everything, including the unsavory of parts of thomas’ addictive lifestyle. she even points out the clauses in thomas’ fathers inheritance. it’s all there in fine print, this would kill even the highest star’s reputation.

“but sophia, won’t this kill your career?” you ask, realizing there’s no way for her to get out of this freely. surely his team will try and ruin her, ruin everything that she’s worked so hard towards.

“we’re going to leak it to multiple sources, anonymously of course. we’ll leak it tomorrow morning. it’ll be the first day of freedom, i won’t be under his clutches anymore.” she says exasperatedly, dropping the phone onto her bed. 

“tomorrow? why tomorrow?” you ask, going back to holding her hands. 

“i wanted to tell you first, everything about me and my past, you should hear it from me. i didn’t want to leak it and have you find out that way. you deserved to hear it from me.” 

“thank you.” it meant more to you than she could ever know. you were tired of hearing about everything after the fact, almost like an afterthought. to hear about everything firsthand was a relief, she considered how you would feel and took the time to explain the situation to you.

she gives you a kiss, a soft one. one that blooms feelings of love in your chest once more.

“i’m sorry, for everything.” she expresses. 

“i know fia.” you respond, giving her a kiss that makes her wrap her arms around you, trying to deepen the kiss when you pull back. “but i need time, to process everything. i don’t think i can give you my heart as it is right now.” 

you want to, but how could you be expected to offer your heart on a silver platter even with everything that’s been revealed. a part of you still resents her for what she’s refused to tell you, you know it was because of thomas but still there are things that wound your heart. and you need time.

you two were by no means perfect, but you would try everything to make it so that you two could work. 

and sophia, she would try ten times harder to win your heart back.

she swore to God she would.

--

a/n: the much anticipated pt2 of the 'save a horse, ride a cowgirl' fic. i hope i have brought the story to justice. stay safe and stay healthy everyone. cheers, hope you've enjoyed!

[arolesbianism]

Stares at the sekai writers with my big wet brown eyes. Pls don't forget abt how Kanade hid the fact that she met with Mafuyu's mom from them and that Mafuyu knows abt that now

[ghostedgwen]

but I knew you | j.potter [part four]

note : THANK YOU THANK YOU FOR ALL THE ENTHUSIASM towards this fic! I can't believe I got over 400+ notes on the first three parts. This is wild! I am so grateful for u guys, pls enjoy the final part<33 p.s : my requests are open again if any of u are interested in sending anything

warning : more angst but some cute moment as well, some anxiety on your part but jsut briefly mentioned, James and his relentless firting, I swear this part is kinder, happy ending - sort of

James gets into an accident during a Quidditch game and develop amnesia - he doesn't remember the past 2 and a half years, and he currently has the mentality of fourth-year James. This doesn't bode well for you that your boyfriend of 2 years now currently thinks he's still  in love with Lily.

└——————— - [ 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 : 𝚃𝚊𝚢𝚕𝚘𝚛 𝚂𝚠𝚒𝚏𝚝 - 𝙲𝚊𝚛𝚍𝚒𝚐𝚊𝚗 ]. +

You cannot believe you are here again.

Watching over his sleeping figure in the infirmary while Madam Pomfrey fuss over him.

You all decided to keep quiet about McLaggen for now, so you lot were being chastised by the matron over the "prank gone wrong" incident that landed James on her lap again.

You could feel the anger bubble in you but kept it at bay as James' well-being came first, obviously.

"Now, I have matters to discuss with Dumbledore so you four can look after Mr.Potter here." He tells you before leaving abruptly.

None of you dared to question her and only watched her leave. Once she was gone, you turn to the other three boys and they kept quiet, seeing the scary expression you had on. Peter looked like he was about to piss himself.

"____," Remus cautiously called out your name. "Are you okay? McLaggen said some vile things back there, we hope you know that we won't let him get away with this."

Sirius huffs. "The bloody fuck we won't, fucker will deserve what's comin' for him when James wakes up."

You nod slowly at them. "Could I - ask for some privacy, with James?" You ask them, watching them all get up and nod at you with sympathetic smiles. "I just, wanna think of what to say once he wakes up and I was hoping to have him all to myself for a bit when he comes about."

"No worries, we understand." Remus tells you and he pats Sirius on their way out as the other boy looked about ready to set the castle on fire. "We'll see you back at the common room."

You give them all the best smile you could muster while they piled out and it was just you left all alone to your thoughts. Your face was immediately  encased in the palm of your hands as you allow your frustrations to settle in.

Having held onto it well enough to get James settled into the infirmary first, you could feel the tears build up. It's already bad enough your boyfriend couldn't remember you, but then he gets injured again - and you feel like everything is your fault.

You missed your James even more.

He would know how to hold you, what to say and just what to give. He always knew you so well that you couldn't even be mad at him for even a minute, he was always quick to melt your resolve and fix anything that is even remotely broken.

James was perfect - so much so that you almost thought the universe had created him exactly for you. All the time he spent chasing after another girl long forgotten when he treated you so well, and not once made you doubt his loyalty -

Lily was a story of a very distant past, but that past has come back to haunt you.

But despite all this, you still love him. It did not waver one bit, despite how much hurt you got from the Quidditch accident, despite the struggle of going through your memories by going around the castle - you still wanted James Potter.

With a resigned sigh, you look up at him again to see his sleeping figure and wondered just how it all went so badly wrong.

You look around the Great Hall pointedly ignoring the way people were whispering as you walked by, it has been like that ever since James Potter very oublicly announced that you werer the new subject of his latest fascination.

At least, that's what you thought. 

There was no way a boy who pined for a girl for 2 whole years would just up and change his mind upon meeting you. He just probably got bored by the same familiar faces in the castle and barely met anyone outside.

You knew you were fresh, and even the other boys in your year wanted their slimy hands on you. You paid them all no mind and headed for the table cluttered with students clad in red and gold. 

Almost full from the attention, you still managed to serve yourself Dinner and pointedly ignored how even the Professors barely concealed their interest in you. You barely made it into Gryffindor, almost getting sorted into Slytherin.

You wondered if Potter's demeanour would be completely different if that was the case. 

You didn't get to think too deeply on it when he made his presence known, pushing aside the 2nd year boy that sat next to you in order to provide space for himself, which he eagerly took with a charming grin your way.

"Oh hey there, ____."

You ignore him. He did not seem fazed one bit as you learned that he's quite used to the treatment, how he's not dying from shame is beyond you. You continue eating until you could barely swallow anything, too uncomfortable from the way he watched you so shamelessly.

"Bloody fuck, what do you want, Potty?"

He lets out an exasperated laugh. "We're on nickname basis, eh?"

"Don't talk to me like we're close, like I like you." you tell him off but he brushed off your harsh words as if they never even left your lips.

"Alright, I'll take it though it's too out of my style -now what to call you. . ." he trailed off, then his lips stretched into a devilish grin. "Pretty girl."

You almost choked in your own spit. "What?"

"Pretty girl, that's your nickname."

"You are unbelievable."

"Thank you." he winks, taking a sip from his goblet.

.

.

"I'm going to be completely raw and honest, and I need you to answer me without any of your jokes and witty remarks," you tell him, biting the insides of your cheeks. "Please tell me it's real."

James frowned, he can see the tears building up in your eyes and it felt like a punch to his gut to see that expression on your face. He was too used to see you either scowling at him or laughing at either his fuck-ups or his jokes, though you admit to hating his audacity, you always laughed when he earned it.

This is new.

This is a new face that he wasn't sure how to process, so he asked - "What do you mean?"

You let a brief moment of silence pass as you gather all your strength to say your thoughts out loud. Nights spent questioning everything, wondering just what and why, you couldn't just come up with the answers yourself, so here you are.

"I need you to tell me it's real. All those months you chased after me, please tell me it wasn't just some game to you to get you out of your rejection streak from Evans - Merlin, please swear to me this is real so I can stop being scared."

His frown deepened, if that was even possible, and he took careful steps towards you. hesitantly grabbing your hand so he can hold it and the action urged you to meet his eyes. Although confusion pooled in them, there was also so much sincerity.

"This is real," James assures you. "This is very real and what I feel for you is not some game. You are not a prize to be won, ____. What are you scared of?"

You let out a humorless laugh as the tears finally fall. "Merlin, I think - I know - I am falling in love with you, and I needed you to tell me it's real because I needed to know it was safe to fall."

James' look of confusion slowly faded away and his pursed lips broke into a wide grin, his hold on your hand tightening as he felt the excitement bubble inside him.

"You don't have to be afraid, pretty girl," James kissed your hand without a second thought. "I will gladly catch you if you fall."

.

.

"James, you're not listening," you tell him with a roll of your eyes and he abruptly stopped whatever he was doing to focus solely on you. "Did you hear a word I said?"

James grinned his charming grin, neglecting to answer you because you both knew what he was gonna say anyway.

You groan. "I said I can't go with you to Hogsmeade, you snogging my face off every chance you get distracted me enough from my Potions essay that is due in 2 days."

James' expression soured at that. "You said it yourself, pretty girl," he smirks with a cross of his arms. "It's 2 whole days away."

"Uh huh, and my parchment is empty, not even a single drop of ink," you roll your eyes again. "Give my lips a break so my hands can get to work - don't even make a dirty joke or I will throw you out."

James let out a bark of laughter. "You can't throw me out of my own dorm room?"

"The bloody hell I will!"

As the memories replayed in your head, you can't help but sink deeper and deeper into your thoughts. The memories always seemed so sweet and innocent, but now had bitter aftertaste from your current predicament.

They did always say to treasure the present, for how quickly it can turn into a distant past - but you are only 17, you didn't think the past would be that far behind you so quickly. 

James would apologize profusely for even bringing up Lily again, he knew how much it scared you to let yourself fall for him. How much you struggled with the vulnerability of being in love, and yet all of that came back to hit you.

You can already tell how dramatic he'd get. Maybe even get on his knees as a grand gesture.

James. . .what would he even say - 

"Galleon for your thoughts, pretty girl?" 

Your head immediately snap to the direction of the voice and you felt your tears finally fall once your eyes met his warm hazel hues. Without even asking any questions, you could already tell that he was back. Your James, he's here.

"Jamey?" You ask, hesitantly approaching him, and he flashed you his famous Potter grin.

"In the flesh," he managed to joke out with a wink. "Mind telling me why my head feels like it got assaulted by bludgers?"

You laughed, throwing your body on him to hug him. The implications could be minded later, you just wanted to celebrate the fact that he's back, you got him back and all your inhibitions melted away.

"You have a lot to make up for," you sniffled, face buried into his neck. 

He hugged you back, his hold on you tight and secure as you allowed more tears to escape your eyes. Your James is finally back, and nothing else mattered for now.

.

Sirius throws his head back laughing, almost spilling the content of his goblet. Remus scooting away to avoid getting any of it to spill on him, making a face at Sirius who failed to see his disgusted expression.

"Fucking hell! We ought to thank McLaggen instead for hitting you," Sirius continues laughing, obviously having had too much Firewhiskey. "Thanks to his cheap ass attack, we got you back, mate!"

James laughed along though his eyes rolled halfheartedly. "Fuckin' twat still has to pay for trying it on with ____."

Remus clears his throat. "He's been hiding from us ever since, quite well, might I add."

Peter laughs from his seat on the floor, lap full of empty snack wrappers. "Least he's got his own head on straight, won't work though."

Sirius finally stopped cackling like a maniac and turned to you who sat on James' lap. "What are you thinkin', ____? Exploding zits? Broken ribs? A broken nose?"

You shake your head with a chuckle. "I am gonna sit this one out. I am just happy James is back."

James smiled at you, making Sirius let out sounds of disgust and Remus with a joking 'boo!' at the cute display of affection. Then Peter perked up from his seat as if he jsut remembered something very important.

"I reckon I've been told McLaggen is deathly afraid of spiders."

the end.

masterlist

-

Tags - @sweetstrawberrianne @d1lf-loverrr @hisparentsgallerryy @jaeviii @simp-for-fiction @froggiedragon @paankhaleyaaar @cumuluscranium @acad3miawhore @notmeduhh @cupcakesnviolets @msmarklee1213 @suyaaachin ! Thank you so much for following this fic 🌸

[rafeandonlyrafe]

easter day

words: 1.3k

warnings: 18+ only, smut, dad!rafe, mom!reader, fluffy and cute, talk of pregnancy, p in v sex

“when are they getting here?” rafe questions, hands on your hips, leaning over your shoulder to look at the counter where you're finishing frosting the sugar cookies with various pastel colors.

“uhh…” you glance at the clock. “any minute now.” you set down the piping bag as you finish the last detail and turn to look at rafe, changing your voice to a whisper. “are all the eggs hidden?”

“yup.” he nods. “and i already told harper that the small blue ones are for her brother so to let him get the easy ones. the easter bunny told me specifically.”

“smart.” you chuckle, letting rafe pull you in and press your lips together.

“i do just have one complaint.” rafe says, hands moving from your hips to grip your bum. 

“and what would that be?” you look at your husband, one eyebrow raised.

“this dress.” rafe shakes his head. “you look too good in it, you're practically begging me to put a third kid in you.”

“not until elijah is two, remember?” you remind rafe.

“he's 18 months, that's practically two!” rafe lies through his teeth, his grin turning mischievous, knowing just how big of a difference six months can make in a baby's development.

“ill tell you what…” you run your hands up rafes chest. “why don't we sneak away when my parents get here? you know they act like we don't exist anyways.”

you can't blame them, harper just turned 5 and is a handful, which is only added to by elijah. while he's an angel, he's still a toddler and will get into anything and everything if you turn your back for even a minute.

“sounds perfect.” rafe gives you another kiss as harper runs into the kitchen, elijah still distracted in the corner in his bouncer.

“mommy!” she squeals, launching herself at you. you pick her up and easily turn her so she's on your hip. “mommy, mommy.” she continues. “the easter bunny came! i saw eggs in the backyard!”

“oh, yay!” you bounce her slightly as elijah giggles, reacting to harper's excitement. rafe heads to the bouncer and lifts him out.

“and look, mama made cookies.” you show her the frosted sugar cookie eggs and baby chicks. “and i left a couple unfrosted for you to do with grandma and grandpa!”

harper lets out another squeal and wiggles excitedly. “elijah, gammy and gamps are coming over!”

rafe chuckles at her mispronunciation. it started when she was first learning to talk and their names haven't changed since, even elijah calling them their nicknames.

there's a knock at the door and harper wiggles out of your arms to run towards the front, quickly followed by you and rafe, who unabashedly checks you out as harper opens the door to your parents.

“harper!” your mom steps in, wrapping her in a big hug, completing it with pressing kisses all over her face.

“and there's my little man.” your dad takes elijah from rafes arms, whose happy to give him up, itching to get that alone time with you.

you quickly usher your parents in, showing them the unfrosted cookies and other activities to keep your kids attention. 

“rafe and i are gonna go finish their easter baskets.” in truth you've had their baskets finished for a week now, but there's no reason for them to know that.

“okay, that's fine dear.” your mom says, barely glancing to you as harper grabs a butter knife covered in pink frosting.

you grab your husband's hand, and he practically sprints up the stairs, pulling you right along with him into your bedroom.

“god, you knew this would happen didn't you?” rafe questions, hands gripping at your dress, pulling it up as he backs you up towards your bed, keeping the door slightly cracked so you can hear if anyone comes up the stairs. “you know i can't resist this dress.”

you keep your sundresses at the front of your closet, wearing them whenever you find a reason to, purely because of how rafe reacts to them.

“stop talking and hurry up.” you chastise rafe, fingers swiftly undoing the buttons of his crisp shirt until your hands can delve in and feel his muscles.

“yes, ma’am.” rafe smirks, lowering you onto the bed as his lips find yours again, fingers coming to your underwear to feel the wet spot that has started to form. his fingers swipe over the material until you’re moaning quietly, eyes shut.

“god, need to get inside you.” rafe groans, standing to undo his shorts and grab a condom from the nightstand as you take your underwear off, tossing them in the general direction of your hamper. 

you use the moment of silence to listen, seeing if you can hear anything coming from downstairs, but all seems to be calm as rafe pulls your hips to the edge of the bed, lining up his cock with your entrance.

rafe sinks in slowly with a low groan as you gasp, gripping the bed sheets. its been far too long since you’ve been able to have a moment alone like this.

“so good, mama.” rafe wraps your legs around his hips as he begins to move, thrusting in and out of you, thumb already rubbing over your clit, knowing you both need to cum and get downstairs as soon as possible.

“yeah, feels good.” you whine, covering your mouth with your palm as you let out noises, rafe always able to get the sounds out of you even when you should be quiet.

rafe moves faster, cock pushing at your walls, stretching you open for his length.

“shit.” rafe groans. “we need to convince your parents or aunt wheezie to take them for a weekend.”

“mmm, that’s exactly what we need.” you nod. you know that you’d probably end up pregnant again if you had an uninterrupted weekend with rafe, you already feel the urge to reach down and pull the condom off of him, but the thought of dealing with elijah at his current age while pregnant has your mind clearing quickly.

“or we can start sending elijah to daycare once a week.” rafe says, glad that the conversation is helping quell his orgasm somewhat, not wanting to burst inside of you too early.

“fuck, whatever it takes to get more of this.” you push at rafes stomach. he takes a step back as you flip over on the bed, toes touching the floor as you turn onto your stomach.

“god, i wanna marry you all over again.” rafe pushes quickly back insides, thrusts now speeding up as his hands grip your ass, squeezing it and watching the way it jiggles with every thrust.

you push your hand below your body to touch your clit, rubbing it in pace with rafes cock pushing inside of you, pressing your face into the mattress to drown out your noises.

“gonna cum, baby.” rafe warns, cock swelling inside of you before hes releasing with one more deep thrust, triggering your own orgasm as your body shakes.

rafe pulls out, flipping your dress back down over your ass just in case someone sneaks upstairs as he discards of the condom and redresses before heading back to you, helping you turn over to sit on the edge of the bed.

“i love you.” rafe coos, pressing kisses to the top of your head as you lean against him.

“i love you too.” you take his hand in his. “and we should get back downstairs before they get suspicious.”

“absolutely.” rafe nods, following you out the bedroom and down the stairs, leaning in to whisper in your ear when he sees everyone is still occupied with frosting cookies, a smear of orange frosting across harpers nose. “and don’t think i forgot that you aren’t wearing panties anymore.”

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[velvees-archive]

At 20 years old, Miles Edgeworth’s only mentor tells him never to step foot into his opponent’s territory lest he fail to crush them in court. 4 years later, Edgeworth enters Defendant Lobby No. 1 to warn opposing counsel Phoenix Wright about Redd White’s decisive testimony.

Some post-AAI1 reflections + how Phoenix unravels Miles from the very moment they meet again.

After playing through the original trilogy, up to 4-2 on Apollo Justice, and all of Ace Attorney Investigations 1, I couldn’t help but jot down my (admittedly incomplete) thoughts about Phoenix and Edgeworth’s relationship, especially as it pertains to Miles’ “unraveling,” or his departure from von Karma’s teachings.

We already know von Karma had no love for Edgeworth. Crushing the late Gregory Edgeworth’s legacy under the guise of mentoring his son (and eventually ruining his career at its peak) was von Karma’s last act of hatred towards the departed.

From Miles’ perspective, however, von Karma was an accomplished teacher to whom he owed his gratitude and career’s success. This is important because Edgeworth’s actions are fundamentally motivated by his desire to express his “gratitude,” repay debts, and honor legacies.

His debt to von Karma compels him to strive for the perfection his mentor obsesses over. Achieving perfection takes the form of absorbing von Karma’s teachings, among them the AAI1 screenshot from earlier: only face your opponent in court, and make sure you crush them when you do it.

We know for a fact that the “demon prosecutor” internalizes von Karma’s teachings. He follows them to a T.

So, following 15 years of indoctrination, 4 years of putting the von Karma creed into practice, and an entire childhood AND early adulthood’s worth of gratitude, you’d THINK Edgeworth wouldn’t dare dishonor him…

Until he does, by coming to the defendant lobby to speak to his “enemy.”

Prior to playing AAI1, I thought the impetus for Edgeworth’s character development was 1-3, wherein he reevaluated the facts of the case and helped Phoenix get Dee Vasquez a guilty verdict. I still think 1-3 was the first time he consciously acknowledged the possibility (keyword: possibility) that his prosecutorial upbringing wasn’t..sound…(lmao!)

But with this AAI1 von Karma and Bratworth interaction, I now believe it was 1-2—with Edgeworth subconsciously disregarding his mentor’s teachings and Phoenix acting as the catalyst—that shows us when he first strayed from the path of a Von Karma.

An aside: Do I think AAI1 Bratworth was perfectly characterized? Not at all; he’s much too noble for that era of his life, though I don’t think it affects my case.

Edgeworth is a man full of contradictions. He comes to the defendant lobby to tell Phoenix his case is hopeless, though he has no obligation to disclose—nor has he ever set a precedent of disclosing—decisive witnesses’ information to his opponents.

He tells Phoenix he’ll do anything to get a guilty verdict, yet he warns the defense that his witness’s testimony will be considered infallible, prompting the player (Phoenix) to dissect the following testimonies with more care.

He tells Phoenix not to expect any special treatment from him, yet his very presence in the defendant’s lobby is in direct opposition to his respected mentor’s wishes.

It takes just one appearance from Phoenix for the filaments of von Karma’s indoctrination to unravel. 4 years into his career, Edgeworth has met many attorneys—most notably, Mia Fey—who embody Phoenix’s faith in his clients, yet none could shake his foundations like Phoenix Wright.

Edgeworth may have not been ready to turn a new leaf upon his first encounter with Phoenix, but the fact that a loose thread from his childhood (that’s emblematic of his innocence, his dreams, and dare I say his father’s drive) ultimately leads to his unraveling is poetry if I’ve ever seen it.

TL;DR Phoenix deconstructs Edgeworth like he was born to do so. The moment Phoenix decided to chase after him, Edgeworth had already lost.

[xomakara]

Back To Me

SUMMARY |  Mingyu or Hansol? You finally decide who you want to be with.

PAIRINGS |  Mingyu (SVT) x Reader

RATING |  Mature, NSFW, EXPLICIT, MDNI, 18+, Any Minors and Ageless Blogs will be blocked 

GENRE |  smut, just pure unadulterated smut, friends with benefits, angst

CONTENT/WARNINGS |  profanity, lovemaking, unprotective sex, fingering, breast fondling, creampies, dirty talk, kissing, sucking, biting, hair gripping/pulling, praising, hair gripping, oral sex (f.receiving), pet names

LENGTH |  7,662 words 

TAGLIST |  –

NETWORKS |  @k-vanity @ksmutsociety @keopihaus @cosyhomenet @winerys-collection

AUTHOR’S NOTE | Thank you @lovetaroandtaemin as usual for beta-reading these fics that I churn out. I really appreciate it, bestie 💚 Here is the last part of this fwb!Mingyu series. I hope you all like it! Likes, comments, and reblogs (mainly reblogs) are appreciated~

If you haven't read the other parts, you can find them here:  What Are We? (Mingyu x Reader) If We… (Vernon x Reader)

Seventeen Masterlist

Mingyu feels like shit.

Not literally though. Physically, he's perfectly healthy. It's emotionally, his mind feels like absolute shit. It's no surprise that his mental health is a tad bit fragile these days. This has got to be the most stressful time in his entire life so far.

He can't concentrate properly in class or do his school work at home properly without his eyes blurring and his hand cramping up from the constant movement of his wrist. The stupid test coming up next week that is due for 20 percent of the entire course grade is already freaking him out so much that it is the first thing to pop into his mind whenever he awakes. Not even the hot piece of ass beside him the past few nights.

She isn’t you and will never be you.

It has been two weeks and three days since Hansol has started dating you. Not that Mingyu was keeping count or anything. Absolutely not. His free hand that isn’t holding his phone squeezes his forehead in annoyance. For the past fifteen minutes Mingyu has been trying so hard to focus and study.

But everything fucking hurt. And every time he flips through the pages of his books, the words keep swimming in front of him. So now here he lay on his back, on top of his unmade bed with a head filled with nothing but you and you. And the fact that it's only Monday is adding to his aggravation.

When he sees the text he received from you, he swears his vision has become fogged by the words he's reading over and over.

'Yes.'

An ache pierces his heart like a dagger stabbing at his very chest. How could this happen to him? This isn't how he imagined things would happen. How has it gotten this far and this complicated? Sure he's asked you a million times to be his girlfriend. Sure, you always turn him down, but still, you keep finding yourself back in his bed almost every night of the week. Sure you'd refused and protested countless times, but did he force you to do any of these things?

Is this just an endless cycle?

He squeezes his eyes shut. A sigh. Then another.

Who is he kidding?

Of course he’s being delusional. How could he have just presumed that because the both of you continued sleeping together and occasionally saw each other throughout the day for food or just to hangout together—no matter who they were with—means that things would go his way. But Mingyu guessed it was his fault for never pursuing a real, emotional relationship with you. Maybe if he hadn't set those boundaries from the start of your no-strings relationship, then none of these things would be happening right now.

Sure it might've taken longer than it should for him to realize how he's actually developed feelings. Why can't you realize that he knows what the two of you have is real, and it’s strong? You two are perfect for each other.

Can't you see that?

All those times you and he have kissed, the times he’s touched you intimately, the amount of nights and mornings the both of you have fucked, the number of times the two of you cuddled afterwards, the numerous conversations the two of you have had duringall that time. How could you not see what Mingyu sees?

Has he ever expressed it properly? Or are you just choosing to not see what's directly in front of you? Is there someone else? Does Hansol take you in and give you more tender loving care than he can provide for you? Is he better to you than Mingyu ever could?

Is he not enough?

Maybe. Just maybe.

Perhaps Mingyu hasn't done enough.

Hasn't shown or proven himself to be a suitable partner and be worthy of being able to love you the way you ought to be loved.

And it pisses him off.

He’s fucking jealous. So fucking enraged.

Because all these years, it was only him. Your attention. Your affection. Your time. All for Mingyu alone. Only him. But now? Now things were getting out of his control. Things have changed. And it pisses him the fuck off.

Out of sight, out of mind, was what Mingyu told himself. But in this situation, where it concerns you, it’s different. Seeing you and him together hurts, yet the more he sees, the more the desire to rip Hansol's arms away from you, snatch you away and hide you from his gaze gets stronger.

He needs you. Badly.

Then maybe... he’ll see and stop denying the fact that he's absolutely in love with you.

He tried to see other women after he found out you were dating Hansol, hoping it would do him good. But there was no use. Even while on a date, he would think of you and wish you were the girl in front of him instead.

Mingyu doesn't know when, how or why exactly, but somewhere in the middle of your little 'friends with benefits' thing, he began having feelings for you, and he had no one but himself to blame.

Because while Mingyu knows that he was the one that set that clear boundary between the both of you, it had to be his heart, the one foolishly going ahead and falling for you. It’s only in his fantasies where Mingyu is able to say whatever and do whatever he'd want to you, as many times as he wants and whenever he'd like to. That isn’t what’s actually happening. Because, if it were his choice, no one else would be touching or holding your pretty hands, no one else would see that sleepy smile of yours, or hear you laugh the way he did. No one would be able to wake up next to you, or hold you at night and hear you talk and cry about how the things of your life were weighing too heavy. Only him.

"Dude, you okay?" his best friend's voice interrupts and brings his attention back to reality. Wonwoo sits there, a book open on his lap and a pencil tucked behind his ear.

Mingyu lowers his phone with a sigh, staring at the glow-in-the-dark stars on the ceiling. "Honestly, I feel like shit, man. I just..."

"If you had only confessed to her before, things would be different," he gives Mingyu a serious look. Wonwoo sighs and leans back, tilting his chair with his foot and rolling backwards on the wheels, facing Mingyu from across the room. "Out of all the other girls you fucked with, Y/N is the longest one you've had yet. Most of the girls that you get involved with never last longer than two weeks, yet for two years she's been stuck by your side," he pauses with a nod, glancing upwards before returning back. "Either she's incredibly loyal to you and tolerates your bullshit, or the two of you really have something special," his deep eyes scrutinize, studying and contemplating.

"I don't know man, but lately, it just hasn't been the same," Mingyu props his arm on his forehead, resting on the pillows. "She keeps ignoring me and hanging out with him," he pouts. "It feels like I did something wrong when I didn't do shit."

Wonwoo sighs, setting his book and notebook down on his desk before standing and walks towards the bathroom. "Honestly I feel like it's both of your faults," his low voice mumbles, staring at his reflection in the mirror and fixing his hair. He glanced towards Mingyu from the cracked door. "We're heading out for dinner tonight."

"Who's coming?" Mingyu asked.

"Everyone."

"Y/N and Hansol too?" Wonwoo nods, and Mingyu lets out a groan.

"Don't be such a child. How are you going to even handle seeing your girlfriend around when we all share the same mutual friends?" Wonwoo takes off his shirt, walking into the closet and fishing out a clean shirt from the hanger.

"She's not my girlfriend," the tall man mutters. "Also, not so great that you'll all be laughing and having a good time and all while I'm moping on the side."

"Not really our fault dude. Maybe next time, try being honest and not fucking up." Wonwoo takes the comb in his hand, styles his hair and looks at himself once more. He takes off the reading glasses on his face, adjusts his round-framed eyeglasses, then grabs a denim jacket. "Hurry up and get ready."

"How the fuck are you supposed to help if you don't even understand," Mingyu stands and mutters the curse to himself. Wonwoo is already walking out the room and closing the door.

"Mingyu hurry your big ass up, or we'll be leaving without you," Seungcheol yells through the door and knocks a few times before walking away. 

"Alright I'm coming," Mingyu calls out, moving quickly and picking the first outfit his hands caught. He quickly gets dressed, the stress of the finals wearing on him and adding to his anxiety, not knowing what he might run into next.

You. With your boyfriend.

Just fucking great.

Dinner that night was weird.

For you. Not everyone else.

When your mutual friends decide to get together at a restaurant for dinner and fun. Hansol, who you had been hooking up with for awhile now, clings to your arm. With every laugh or chuckle, he hugs you tight to him. Mingyu sits next to you, silent and glum. You've known him long enough to know his signs. Something is eating at him.

Your heart aches at seeing how crestfallen he seems. And despite being here with Hansol, the fake boyfriend of yours, you keep thinking back and forth between the two men.

Dinner is awkward, to say the least, sitting between Hansol and Mingyu, whose own plate lay abandoned as he sips his alcohol and sighs heavily to himself. He would talk to the others, but not to you, and it hurt more than it should've. Hansol seems a little concerned too, not that Mingyu is outwardly acting odd or hostile towards him or anything. He even goes so far as to squeeze Hansol's shoulders and slap his shoulder, laughing.

When it comes to talking to you or making contact, Mingyu is absolutely avoiding you. He does everything in his power, even ignoring you at times. Mingyu's pained expression is nearly impossible to deal with. His sad and distressed gaze is nearly ripping your insides to shreds, so much you wanted to reach and rub the frown and lines in his face away.

“Mingyu,” you place a hand on his thigh, “you okay?”

"Yeah," his voice comes out quieter and subdued. Mingyu turns his head away quickly, only to find Hansol's worried gaze searching him, noticing the subtle behavior.

"Something wrong man?" he frowns a little, brows knit together in question.

"Don't worry about me. The real question is are you guys doing okay?" Mingyu coughs slightly, and you both feel the tension of the atmosphere building. Mingyu seems off today.

"What makes you think we're not alright?" Hansol smiles lightly and glances over at you with an innocent stare, pressing a chaste kiss upon your lips, and you smile softly.

You don’t have much time to think before Hansol's soft mouth captures yours, the tenderness of the kiss distracting you momentarily. However, it does the exact opposite for Mingyu, whose mood becomes foul. You can tell Mingyu is looking on with his hands clenched. "Just asking, is all," he downs the drink in his cup, sighing as his eyes land on the both of you, stealing a glance that doesn’t go unnoticed. But you don't have the time to register the slight hurt, jealousy and rage that flashes in his orbs. Or how his smile disappears almost instantaneously at seeing Hansol kissing you.

"Can I ask what's eating you then?" Hansol raises a brow, concern filling his stare.

"I just had a stressful week, that's all," his eyes harden, masking the hurt. A pause and a momentary stillness comes.

"Nothing too bad, right?" Hansol shifts closer, slapping his back hard.

"Just exams," Mingyu responds, shrugging him off. "Don't worry too much."

The night wears on, and finally, Mingyu leaves before the rest of you do. The other friends depart before them, leaving you and Hansol to stand and finish your drinks.

"Well that was really something else," he chuckles dryly and breathes deeply, swallowing the cold beverage down, and you sit silently on his right side, leaning your arm against the surface of the table, head propped on the palm of your hand. "Feel free to give me a heads up if I should back down and let him win."

You sigh softly and turn to meet Hansol's eyes, deep and warm pools. But despite his attractive face and the fact that he’s a great guy, he’s no Kim Mingyu. "I just...don't know." You admit, pursing your lips. Hansol has been nothing short of great and a generous lover and guy.

But he isn't Kim fucking Mingyu, you reasoned with yourself.

"It's a complicated situation, I won't rush you," he nods and slips on his jacket. Hansol offers a hand to you with an endearing and honest smile, one that brings butterflies to your stomach. "Why don't you see him tonight? Then decide? I think it's time."

"Really?" you’re surprised, taking his offered hand. You bite your lip and squeeze his hand once.

"Go," he lets out a sigh and kisses the back of your hand, smiling. "Before he's gone, and there is no chance left."

It doesn’t take long for Mingyu to return home, unlocking and swinging his door open. He drops his keys in the basket and drags a hand along the wall as he shuts the door, then drops his leather jacket down on the sofa.

He’s exhausted; too drained mentally, physically and emotionally for this shit.

He lets out a frustrated growl, one so powerful it startles even himself when it comes out.

There are more reasons for Mingyu to not want to be around the others anymore, and it’s frustrating, knowing he’ll have to do a hell lot of pretending that he’s fine. In front of them. When it is in fact far from that. He takes out his phone, the screen bright and a picture of the both of you was the wallpaper, smiling so cutely, so happily that the frustration and irritation within Mingyu only builds higher and higher.

Hansol is treating you well, isn't he? He must be, judging the way you stare up at him with loving orbs and that fucking grin. How could he ever do better and love you more than that fucker is?

It pisses him off to no end.

"Mingyu," a voice speaks.

He jerks his gaze up and notices you standing by the door..

He sighs, sitting down on the couch and groaning in his hand. "Y/N what are you doing here? How'd you get in?" He mumbles.

"I still have the spare, remember?" your voice comes  softly and hesitantly. Mingyu inhales deeply, a shiver racking throughout his frame.

"Shouldn't you be with Hansol?" his eyes meet yours, cold. "I thought you guys are in love and stuff," the tone has bite, and he refuses to break contact. His fist clenches and unclenches, eyes narrowing, staring.

"Mingyu, please," you whisper brokenly. "Don't."

"Why not Y/N? Am I just some sort of fool to play around with? Is that all you saw me as, as some stupid person that wouldn't mind being made a fool of?" Mingyu's head is filled with all sorts of images, thoughts and feelings.

"That’s not—"

"Then what?" he interrupts, jaw ticking in anger. "What is it exactly you saw in me? For two whole years, is this all we were worth? Sexual companions and nothing more?" Mingyu snaps, brows pinched and his jawline taut. "Or maybe for the longest time, I was a joke to you. Or a convenient person to spend your lonely nights with," he doesn’t intend for his words to cut so deep, but they do, and when you cringe visibly and flinch, his chest tightens in regret and guilt.

"You think I don't know how badly I messed up, Mingyu? You don't think I regret not giving a proper answer when you kept asking me to be your girlfriend?" tears cloud your vision. "You don't think I keep feeling the pangs of pain and confusion, with so many what-if's and maybe's whenever I am near you?" you approach slowly, standing in front of Mingyu. His expression remains hardened, refusing to express any emotion and let himself feel weak. "I'm scared, Mingyu," your voice lowers, whispering and afraid to meet his gaze, as the truth will probably get spilled at a moment's notice.

"Don't do that," his tone softens a fraction. "Please, don't pull that bullshit," he looks away.

"Mingyu, I'm scared that if we take things further, and we inevitably drift apart, then what do I have left?" the ache in your heart twists and pierces sharply. "What will I do if I get addicted to you, and everything that has happened up to this point falls away?" the air shifts, as silence weighs between. Tears fill the rims of your eyes, and you finally look up, locking your gaze on Mingyu's brown irises. "What will I do if you grow bored of me like all the others you've been with before?" your voice cracks slightly, swallowing the lump in your throat.

His features relax, hardened gaze becoming vulnerable. He stands, reaching out. You watch as his large hand reaches and cups your cheek gently, carefully. He steps closer, holding your face delicately and pulling you in towards him, soft gaze fixated on your orbs, filled with nothing but sincerity. The back of his fingers caress you, trailing along your jawline.

"Y/N," your name falls off his lips so effortlessly, a hush from his lips. You press forward, wrapping your arms around Mingyu's middle. And for the first time in a long time, the both of you let things go naturally, simply standing, embracing each other. He holds you tighter, burrowing his face into the crook of your neck, inhaling the faint scent of the shampoo he knows you use every morning, memorizing it in case you become nothing but a memory. Mingyu's larger frame dwarfs yours, shielding you, embracing you tightly against his muscular torso.

"Mingyu, I'm sorry, I really am," the whisper is quiet, and yet it cracks in the silence between, almost as if it has never existed. "I should've talked to you, communicated and been truthful. I was just so scared and I felt like, ‘this might end’." The admission is tender.

His lips are set on your forehead, lingering for a few seconds, and then Mingyu pulls away, taking hold of your face in his large, steady palms. The dark depths of his brown eyes hold your gaze, reflecting the slight hint of emotion behind it. Your fingers come and grasp hold of his wrists. You almost allow yourself to melt when Mingyu brushes your hair, fixing the strand out of your face and running a finger along the skin below your ear. The tips of his fingers stay there for the next seconds.

"Y/N, I need an honest answer from you, and a direct one," a moment passes, and Mingyu's words still hang in the air. You pull away and glance back with teary eyes. "Do you really and honestly have feelings for me?" his orbs flicker downward, lips pressed in a thin line. He won't speak until you do.

"Yes," it takes you less than a second to utter the one word, yet it feels like an eternity has passed. "Please..." the word leaves your lips. "I need you."

"What about Hansol?" his jaw clenches briefly.

"No, Mingyu," your teeth nibble your bottom lip. "Right now, it's just you and me. Just us," you begin, and he presses you back, pushing you slowly into the wall. Mingyu leans his head back and takes a moment to collect his thoughts before swooping down to claim your soft lips. 

Your arms move swiftly, holding onto his shoulders, clawing at the fabric of his shirt, the contact sending electricity through him. He continues the desperate action, deepening and molding, matching your actions. He makes no attempt to stop or pull away. And despite the strength and intensity behind the kiss, his tenderness isstill there, coming through in every sense of the word.

For so many nights, you've dreamed of and reminisced upon these past experiences of Mingyu kissing you, just like he is. Inhaling the smell and fragrance which was utterly his own. Of the sweet taste, of the taste that never seems to diminish nor fade away despite how long it's been.

Like it's his very first kiss, and he's desperate to never lose such an unforgettable taste. It’s the urge to say, “Fuck everything else, who cares.” You had never wanted to get so lost in him. The heat of his hands burns on your skin, even after the touch is gone. He moves, unable to stay still while kissing you. A small groan from the back of your throat elicits from the pressure against the wall, and he hoists you up, forcing your legs around his waist. He's immediately hard for you.

His arousal thickens, his body stiff. Mingyu pants, eyes closing, groaning softly as you roll your hips. His hand lowers and squeezes the flesh of your ass, grinding and thrusting his lower half with desperate movement, making sure to match your rhythm.

When it's time, you want to savor it. To commit everything into memory, every curve, slope and dip of his muscular figure.

"Say my name," he purrs into your ear. "I want to hear it."

"Mingyu," it falls from you softly, an echo in his ears and an unadulterated moan of a prayer.

He carries you to the couch and sits, bringing your bodies as close as humanly possible. He runs his lips up your neck, making his way back to the lips he loves so desperately, tongues fighting for dominance. "Again, baby girl. Please," he whispers against your lips. His hot breath mingles with yours as his fingers trace every crevice of your figure, his lips hungry and demanding.

Mingyu wants to taste you in ways you could only ever imagine. In ways you want, no, need so badly.

"Again," he growls, eyes trained on you, hunger clear in his eyes as he stares into you. "Say it."

"Mingyu," you’re practically pleading, staring deep into his eyes. "Mingyu," you whisper into the kiss and feel the vibrations in his throat. He smiles against your mouth and pushes back your hair, continuing to move in the most intimate position, to match his every rock against you.

"It sounds so good when you call my name like that." The growl is deep from his throat, and his words slur from intoxication, from being drunk off the very essence of you and only you. "Did you and Hansol fuck a lot like we did?" The thought and mention of someone else brings his desire down temporarily, but the satisfaction to be one with you is far stronger.

"Why? What are you going to do if we did?" The daring tone in your voice is unexpected.

“Gonna fuck you so good so that you forget any name but mine, and any guy but me. So fucking good you can only scream my name and remember that you were made for me," he groans and pants, hips bucking. "So good that you won't even think of another cock but mine." His hands draw your shirt above your head, and his lips leave yours, moving down to your throat. He latches onto the sensitive spots and sucks, tongue dipping into the crevices, tasting and savoring every part of your body he has the pleasure of reaching. Mingyu sucks, tongue swirling patterns, and he presses into the bite, his hips raised. "And so good that you'll be satisfied by nobody but me and only me."

He rips his own shirt off before proceeding, mouthing down and nipping at the valley in-between your breasts, sucking a small hickey at the spot.

“What if Wonwoo and Seungcheol come back early? What happens if they see what's going on between us, Mingyu?" You gasp.

"Let them watch. What I do with you doesn't concern them, or anybody for that matter," he growls, looking into your eyes. "We've fucked at all those parties, in dark alleys and dark bedrooms when everyone's around. What's one more show for them to see?"

His audacity is almost unbelievable. Mingyu never did mind putting on a show in the most extreme and risky manner. It was a clear sign of his adrenaline and recklessness. Or he’s gone so crazy for you that nobody matters at this point in time.

"Can’t we fuck in a bed for once? Please? I can't count on all of my fingers how many times you’ve fucked me against walls, and desks and tables," you argue, lightly shoving Mingyu back. He laughs and nods, following suit and backing away. He lifts you effortlessly, allowing you to wrap your arms around his neck and wrap your legs securely around his waist. You nuzzle the spot under his jaw, whispering "Good boy."

He groans softly in response.

The moment his bedroom door opens, Mingyu practically throws you on the mattress and hovers. He's quick to pull off the rest of your clothes and toss them elsewhere, not worrying where they may end up.

You tug on his belt and throw it to the ground. Mingyu kicks off his pants and boxers next, quickly. Once he's stripped and bare for you, he parts your legs further and moves between them, caging your smaller frame in as he reaches up to hold the headboard with his fist. You run your hands up his toned torso, all the way up, and your fingers graze and tickle the hair at the nape of his neck.

“Tell me what you want, and it's yours," his gaze holds an unfamiliar edge. Something foreign and different, dark and dangerous. It awakens a part of you that makes your muscles tighten.

"Anything?"

"Anything," he answers quickly.

Your fingers card through the silky black strands on Mingyu's scalp. "Want you to eat me out, Gyu. Wanna fuck myself on your face."

With a smirk and a roll of his eyes, he starts his way south on your body. He pecks down your chest, between the valley of your breasts and lower. Leaving light marks and red patches, the slight pain brings out the need and want within.

"Missed me, baby?" a smug grin stretches as his nose bumps your clit, leaning down to leave feathery kisses along the inside of your inner thigh. "How badly did you miss this?"

"So fucking much," you grit, hands curling into his hair.

"Tell me about it," Mingyu kisses the sensitive spots and teases, adding in light nips every now and then. The vibrations from his throat shoot all the way up to his tongue, and you moan at the contact. "Felt so empty and incomplete when you couldn't have me?" The tease is clearly evident as his large hands spread your thighs, a pleased and smug hum leaving his mouth as he pushes his tongue flat.

"Fuck," you grip tighter, tugging on the dark strands and throwing your head back into the pillow. Your feet dig into his back and shoulders for leverage, attempting to gain back control, but Mingyu won’t budge and seems perfectly content staying where he is and letting his mouth and tongue do the work. Mingyu continues to press against your folds and lap along them slowly, eyes trained on your expression, on your lips parted in ecstasy and the hazed look of bliss that coats your orbs.

"Look at that," Mingyu says, flicking your clit with his finger before replacing his fingers with his tongue, "That's my good girl."

He continues, tongue tracing all the right places, stimulating each part, pressing and circling your bundle of nerves over and over. You whimper, holding tighter onto the mattress, digging in your nails.

"Who," Mingyu pauses, smirking wickedly up at you. "Who is making you feel this way?"

"You, only you," the cry leaves you before you know it.

"My name, baby. Say my name," he licks across once, causing you to shake, before a shudder shoots down your spine.

"Oh fuck, please," a desperate sob comes out, and a broken moan follows. 

"My name, Y/N," He punctuates every syllable with a torturously slow drag of his tongue. He knows just how to break you. How to leave you at his mercy, so that you’ll be nothing but his. Only his.

"Mingyu," you whine, and he groans in response, a satisfied sound.

"Good job, baby girl," a deep whisper into your thigh. His hands pin your legs apart, preventing them from trapping his head or slowing him down. Mingyu closes his mouth around you and sucks, tongue darting to lick inside. You arch your back off of the sheets, unable to speak coherently or think straight. "Keep talking," Mingyu breathes. "Tell me how fucking great my mouth feels."

"Holy shit, oh shit," the string of curses falls from your lips.

"Give me more; don't hold out. I want to hear all of it. Give it all to me," the fire of his words is fuelled when he returns to circle the flat of his tongue against your clit, and you let go, free falling into the abyss.

Your orgasm rocks through you, and you whine at the overwhelming sensation, arching your spine and gripping his hair. Mingyu moans, continuing his movements.

He holds himself up on both of his elbows, tucking his head and grinning, satisfied with his actions. Your breathing remains heavy as he pulls himself up, closer. He braces himself on his forearms, hovering, looking down at you, a small smile and contentment settling on his features.

Mingyu's right hand moves to cup the side of your neck, his thumb stroking across your collarbone. You turned, opening your eyes slowly to gaze up at his handsome face. The soft lighting washes over his bare shoulders, accentuating the outline, the dips and crevices of his body. "Hey," he leans down, nose bumping gently.

"Hey yourself," the giggle bubbles out, and you run a hand across the back of Mingyu's neck and down his back. "So..." you hum, shuffling in your spot to meet his gaze head-on.

"So..." Mingyu imitates playfully, a twinkle and glint reflecting the faintness of the light in his orbs.

You laugh, hooking a leg over his waist. His nose comes down and trails across your neck and shoulder, his warm lips grazing skin. "Are you going to keep staring? Or..." you lift a brow, smirk evident.

"Someone's eager," Mingyu's fingers dig into the sheets, his length brushing your skin. The familiar throb of desire begins to grow as his length drags.

"And someone's taking their precious sweet time," you pout.

"Let me savor this," he whispers into the column of your throat. "I missed you and your body, everything about you." He kisses, tongue sliding against flesh.

"You know how to make a woman swoon, don't you?" you hum, letting out a soft gasp when the pad of his thumb begins circling your entrance, lightly stroking.

"I only do that when the woman's you, so I'll take it as a compliment." His fingers sink into you with no warning, filling you entirely and curling immediately in all the ways you need and want.

"Shit," you let out a moan.

Mingyu kisses along your neck as his fingers thrust, withdrawing them slowly. His head is bent forward so his lips can find the pulse-point along your throat, and his body is flush against yours as he resumes kissing and sucking and nibbling there, allowing the warmth of your body, the sound of your whimpers to guide him.

"Does that feel good, baby girl?" His thumb curls upwards with his last few thrusts. He nibbles and kisses around the column of your throat before nips just under your chin. His breath washes over your neck, down your neckline, and across your jaw before returning to your earlobe. Your hands scrape lightly at the muscles of his back as he bites the skin behind your ear.

"Ah fuck. Need you, Mingyu," Your words fall out so effortlessly, not holding a care in the world.

He withdraws his fingers and settles his cock against your folds, coating it thoroughly. Slowly, Mingyu rocks his hips and allows his length to slip into you. Once he is fully buried into you, he pauses. You run your hands down his chest and to his shoulders before grasping the taut flesh of his bicep and drawing him down and on top of you. His lips capture yours again, and he shifts his weight onto his arms again. He rolls his hips against you and slides slowly and firmly in and out of you.

God, he fills you so well. Nothing compares. No man compares to the sensations and sparks, not in the same way, nor to the extreme lengths, which he causes in you. Mingyu's nose trails along the skin of your neck, and when his lips press a tender kiss to your throat, you know you wouldn't be able to survive if you were ever without his touches and affection once again.

"Mingyu," a near silent whisper, so light that the smallest breath would send it away, "I... I love you."

His thrusts slow.

His eyes shoot up at the same instant.

Mingyu stares, gazing at you intently. Your hand cups the back of his neck, and you use the other one to brush back his fringe. Mingyu leans his head into your touch, staring, gazing. He breathes slowly, heavily, "Say it again."

He wants to hear it. His large, warm hand slides up and down your cheek, just watching.

"I love you," you turn your lips into his palm, eyes closing. "I love you, Mingyu." You whisper against his palm, the heat and warmth radiating off his skin. "So, so much."

There’s a shift. Something in the air changes when the words fall from your lips and lands onto his.

Mingyu groans, his hand finding yours. He entwines his fingers with yours and pins the limb by the side of your head. "Shit, shit baby, I love you too."

You pull his head forward and kiss him, and as his body is pressed against your naked flesh, all you know is Mingyu's heart pounding hard against you as he buries his face into your neck.

His eyes screw shut tight before repositioning and sitting upright, and you follow, straddling and moving to wrap your arms and legs around him as he grabs onto you, clinging tightly, skin against skin, bare, vulnerable and open. Your breasts press against his torso, and his strong arms wrap around your upper back as he nestles his face into the crook of your neck.

His scent overwhelms and surrounds you, leaving you to only focus on Mingyu. And as he begins rolling his hips in a smooth and gentle rhythm, you focus solely on him, letting your senses be completely captivated by Kim Mingyu and his warmth and being.

Everything feels different.

"I love you," he punctuates. Mingyu keeps repeating the sentence, and as you kiss him, his lips are all over the place, and you’re gasping out the very same words, arching your neck and revealing his name. "I love you. I love you so much, Y/N," his thrusts pick up tempo. The warmth of him surrounds you and wraps and tightens around you.

The angle intensifies the sensation. It increases everything, and his cock hits the spot deep in you. "Fuck," you whisper. "Please, Mingyu, I-"

You're not quite sure exactly what it is you're asking him, but you know, instinctively, you're not the only one who needs more, wants more. He clutches harder, brings you impossibly closer. Your fingers dig into his back. Your head rests on his chest, ear pressed above his heart, hearing its thump against your ears. The noises you make are unadulterated now as Mingyu rocks, grinds and presses into your core, brushing sensitive nerve bundles and sending bursts of pleasure into your nerves.

"I'm yours," Mingyu mutters, gripping you tighter, "and only yours."

He spills deep inside you as he has done numerous times before, but the experience feels different this time, a step taken far greater than the usual sex the two of you engage in. The fact of the matter that the two of you had admitted to the feelings you've been carrying out over these past two years means a lot, everything, to the both of you. You can feel it in the depths of your hearts as he fills and spends himself inside you.

"Stay," Mingyu whispers, placing a delicate, soft and careful peck along the curve of your jaw. His hands slide along your back, the act sensual.The way his fingers dance along your spine is feather-light.

"Do you really think I'd want to go anywhere?" your lips connect with the place just beside his ear. He shifts, shuffling the two of you slowly so that you're on your backs once more, and his large form is still towering over yours and above you.

"Still," Mingyu burrows, face nuzzling and brushing. "I like that you're here. I want you to always be here." His eyes remain half-lidded and heavy when he peeks down and meets your gaze. He takes a long and hard look at you before speaking once more, "Please," a pleading and desperate beg. "Stay, and please stay for good."

"What? You want me to live here?" You raise a brow.

"Would be the easiest solution," Mingyu says, burying his face once more in the crook of your neck. He takes a deep inhale, nostrils expanding. The fingers continue drawing along your skin, never stopping.

"What about Wonwoo and Seungcheol? Won't they say something?" You let out a small laugh, shifting and wiggling to get comfortable under his weight.

"Let me take care of that," he doesn't budge, only stays put. "What about Hansol? Should I be concerned about him? Or others?"

"There's nobody," you brush your hand through his dark locks and chuckle softly, "Never was. We never really dated. It was fake, just hookups. Promise," you grip and hold him as close as possible, never wanting to let him go.

"Sooooo... this is real?" he asks carefully and curiously, almost unsure.

"What do you think?" a laugh, snort, and scoff combined.

"Hmmm, sounds fake." You pinch the muscle, and Mingyu recoils in surprise and shoots you a look before grinning.

"Sounds super real," You snort and shove at his chest, looking into his orbs, and smile.

"Yeah?" the sparkle of his eyes widens, shining.

"Yes, you handsome himbo," your grin matches his.

"Fuck off," his grin only widens more, and the widening spreads to the apples of his cheeks.

"Nah," you sigh, draw the hand across the expanse of the skin, and reach up to cup and caress the side of his face. "I'm sticking around for a long time."

"So you're saying that you finally want to be my girlfriend?" The question is smug, and his words drip with all forms of confidence.

"Only after two years and after a lot of pestering and whining," you mutter the answer.

Mingyu doesn't stop the stupid, lovesick grin plastered on his face from widening any more as he peppers kisses up and along your jaw, pecks scattered all over. His broad, strong arms circle your waist and pull you closer, hold tighter and hug. It's so much. Far too much, and you melt into the embrace, reciprocating and winding your arms around his neck. "About time."

"Shut up."

Mingyu hugs you closer and sighs in contentment and utter joy. It feels as if the weight on his shoulders is lifted, and you wonder why it took so long for the both of you to end up in this moment, being able to freely enjoy and love one another as you truly wish, feeling free for once after hiding it for the past two years.

Hansol sits at the cafe table, spinning his coffee cup around with a bored and unamused expression and gaze. The buzz and bustle is not entertaining in the slightest, but the vibe, people-watching and atmosphere of a cafe is something Hansol is fond of.

You arrive at the location at 1pm on the dot and spot him almost immediately, walking over, shooting a nervous and guilty smile as the seat across him becomes occupied by your frame.

"Hansol," the greeting is quiet and timid.

"You know you don't have to feel bad for choosing Mingyu instead of me. That guy was right for you all along." He sips his hot beverage. "We were never going to work, not when your feelings for Mingyu were, and still are, stronger."

You chew at your bottom lip nervously and stare. "But... I..." your voice dies off in the middle of the sentence, struggling with the right words to speak.

"There's nothing to worry about," Hansol shakes his head with a smile, laughing slightly. "You two belong together, and it was always obvious from day one."

"But we..."

"I'm not saying that I'm giving you up," he grins. "If he ever breaks your heart, you can come running back to me." Hansol winks and raises a suggestive brow.

You roll your eyes, a smile on your lips. "Thanks. Glad I can count on you as a back-up plan."

"If he ever hurts you or anything, he has me and the boys to worry about," he shoots a grin once more.

"Yeah, sure," You laugh and shake your head. "Thanks Hansol," the smile and your gaze soften. "For understanding and everything else."

"Well," he pauses and sighs softly. "We had a great time together, didn't we?" He grins once more, and you laugh along with him.

"One helluva' good ride," you agree.

"Hey, what can I say, I'm the best," he winks and waggles his brows.

You giggle, amused. "Shut up, you big dork."

Hansol laughs. "And I'm guessing now that you've finally pulled the bandage off and are officially dating the idiot, I'm free to get back to actually doing what I want?"

You nod with a laugh. "Yeah. Yes, totally. Go on a rampage. I won't judge. Besides, there's a lot of fish in the sea."

Hansol lets out a laugh, breathless and leaning back in his chair. "That is the damn truth."

"Woah," an all too familiar voice calls your attention, and your head snaps up to see Mingyu approaching the two of you. A huff and breath later, he plops down onto the free chair. "If it isn't two of the greatest pains in my ass."

Hansol smirks. "Hey Mingyu," he greets with a laugh.

Mingyu pulls you onto his lap, his nose nuzzling the crook of your neck and sighing contentedly. You roll your eyes, lips pulled into a smile. Hansol raises a brow in question, lifting the coffee mug to his lips and hiding an amused grin.

"Yo, I’m still here," Hansol laughs.

"Go away," the response leaves Mingyu's lips as he pouts, nipping at the exposed skin along the column of your throat.

Hansol laughs once again and smiles. "Nah, this is a free public area," he grins teasingly, pointing towards the rest of the establishment.

"Who the hell cares," Mingyu mumbles against your skin.

"Stop it," you giggle, poking at his bicep.

"Shuddup, you guys are gross," Minghao drops down into a  seat at the table, glaring at the two of you and sipping on his iced drink.

Mingyu sits upright and holds you firmly, arm secure around your middle.

"Knew he'd catch up and join," Hansol hums, sitting up and kicking his feet. He adjusts in his chair and gestures toward the empty fourth one.

"It's been awhile since we've hung out," Soonyoung mutters as he takes a seat.

"Ah, we can't exactly hang with them much anymore since they're attached at the damn hip,," Hansol snorts, casting a sideways glance.

"What’s wrong with me being with my boyfriend?” you purse your lips and make an attempt to keep the amused grin off your face.

Mingyu pulls you against his chest even tighter and chuckles as Minghao gives him a look, with Soonyoung snorting next to him.

"Disgusting," Minghao rolls his eyes.

"Glad you both sorted your shit out, though," Soonyoung says.

"You're not even a little disgusted by them being this clingy?" Hansol gestures dramatically toward Mingyu, who's pulling you deeper into his embrace. You wrap your arms around his neck, face buried, breathing in and enjoying his scent.

"Meh," Minghao shrugs noncommittally as he waves a dismissive hand. "Been around them way too fucking often," his expression shows minor discomfort and revulsion as Mingyu runs his nose and mouth across your neck.

“Okay lovebirds, go home and do all that shit in the comfort and privacy of the apartment," Hansol barks, amused.

"Wait until they have the wedding and honeymoon," Soonyoung bites down on a shit-eating smirk.

"Cute," Hansol coos sarcastically, kicking lightly at Mingyu's shin as the older man stops his movement for a split second, giving him a look, before returning to his activity of cuddling and loving and embracing.

"Love you," the sound is muffled.

"Love you too," you answer.

And you really do mean it. Every word of it.

[pocmuzings]

welcome  to  a  guide  for  2025  rpc  and  a  throwback  to  the  importance  of  creating  well  rounded  ,  developed  characters  .

a  general  lovenote  and  reminder  on  how  to  create  characters  people  want  to  rp  with  ,  as  discussed  by  g.    please  note  ,  these  are  all  my  own  thoughts  and  feelings  ,  but  i'm  not  '  married  '  to  any  of  this  .  i'm  happy  for  open  conversation  ,  thoughts  ,  feedback  etc  ,  but  i  don't  tolerate  aggressive  messaging  .

the  first  thing  i  think  about  when  i  think about  my  character  ,  whether  for  a  rp  ,  a  book  ,  a  short  story  ,  or  a  1x1  partner  is  .  .  .  where  is  my  character  ?  not  just  physically  ,  but  emotionally  .  what  got  them  there  ?  what  have  they  already  overcome  ?  what  do  they  have  LEFT  to  overcome  ?

whenever  i  write  or  create  a  character  ,  i  think  about  them  in  the  same  way  i  think  about  any  story  making  .  stories  (  typically  and  in  some  manner  )  have  beginnings  ,  climaxes  and  ends  .  they  also  have  problems  that  need  to  be  solved  (  or  not  solved  )  .  there's  an  arc  we  follow  .  we  go  up  the  mountain  ,  then  back  down  again  .

a  beginning  is  not  necessarily  '  born  in  1982  ,  to  two  loving  parents  '  .  it  doesn't  need  to  be  a  beginning  of  time  ,  but  can  just  be  the  beginning  to  your  characters  story  .  e.g  '  despite  having  two  loving  parents  ,  she  had  a  deep  focus  on  soccer  .  if  not  soccer  ,  then  maths  .  if  not  maths  ,  something  else  .  from  a  young  age  ,  she  strove  for  perfection  and  being  the  best  at  something  .'

this  beginning  sets  the  tone  of  your  character  .  in  a  few  sentence  ,  we  can  already  see  what  kind  of  person  she  is  and  know  that  she  has  some  internal  demons  she's  battling  .  we  don't  necessarily  need  her  entire  family  tree  unless  it's  critical  to  the  story.

from  there,  we  have  our  climax  or  problem  statement  ,  where  things  really  begin  to  boil  .  again  ,  it  doesn't  necessarily  need  to  be  '  everything  came  to  a  head  when  her  mother  died  '  .  we  can  make  it  more  character  focused  by  writing  '  in  2012  ,  her  mother  died  and  she  threw  herself  into  trying  to  create  the  perfect  replacement  family  .  she  got  married  to  4  different  men  in  the  space  of  5  years  ,  and  has  5  children  shared  among  them  ,  as  well  as  2  step  children  .  but  she  is  unable  to  settle  down  .  she  feels  restless  .  she  finds  it  hard  to  be  a  mother  because  everything  reminds  her  of  her  own  mother  ,  and  the  loss  she's  endured  .  '  now  ,  we  already  know  two  things  about  our  character  :

1  .  she  wants  to  be  perfect  and  the  best  ,  including  at  creating  families

2  .  she  is  terrified  of  her  role  in  motherhood  due  to  the  loss  of  her  own  mother  and  feeling  unmoored  without  her

this  can  then  take  us  to  the  problem  solving  portion  of  the  character  .  this  is  usually  where  i  like  to  start  my  character  in  rps  and  1x1  and  novel  worlds  .  we  have  these  2  issues  and  2  core  beliefs  within  the  character  .  they're  instrumental  to  her  .  how  are  we  going  to  overcome  it  ?  ARE  we  going  to  overcome  it  ?

we  can  begin  to  think  of  the  butterfly  effect  in  terms  of  our  character  .  we  can  begin  to  think  of  the  tree   and  its  branches  growing  within  her  ,  extending  out  to  other  characters  .  we  can  see  how  she  effects  other  people  ,  including  those  close  to  her  ,  not  close  to  her  ,  new  friends  ,  old  friends  ,  new  love  interests  ,  past  interests  .  we  can  create  drama  and  connections  because  we  have  a  strong  foundation  .

so  .  where  does  it  end  ?  does  it  need  to  end  happily  ?  simple  answer  is  no  .  your  character  can  end  in  the  exact  same  place  as  they  did  at  the  beginning  ,  but  the  point  is  that  we've  gone  on  the  journey  with  the  character  .  maybe  we've  seen  her  talk  to  her  mother's  grave  .  maybe  we've  seen  her  go  to  grief  counselling  .  maybe  she's  gotten  pregnant  or  married  again  .  the  problem  statement  doesn't  stop  her  or  stick  her  in  one  place  .  in  fact  ,  if  anything  ,  it  can  encourage  her  to  keep  making  the  same  mistakes  .  on  the  coin  flip  ,  she  can  learn  .  she  can  grow  .  she  can  heal  .  she  can  mend  the  relationships  with  her  kids  ,  her  past  partners  ,  rekindle  love  ,  or  find  new  love  .  the  whole  point  in  the  made-up  'ending'  for  a  character  ,  is  that  we  have  options  .  we  haven't  locked  her  down  .  we  can  continue  to  plot  ,  connect  ,  develop  ,  etc  ,  as  we  go  along  .

QUESTIONS  AND  THOUGHTS  I  CONSIDER  WHEN  CREATING  A  CHARACTER  :

how  has  your  character  ended  up  where  they  are  right  in  this  moment?  think  about  where  you’re  starting  them  from,  and  what  that  looks  like  realistically.  not  just  physically  :  how  did  they  get  to  this  place  ?  but  also  mentally  :  what  did  they  have  to  do  to  become  the  person  they  are  ?  was  it  good  or  bad  ?  everything  you  are  and  do  and  become  as  a  human  is  made  up  of  tiny  almost  inconsequential  decisions  or  choices  you  made.  you  decided  to  study  x.  you  broke  up  with  y.  your  parent  passed  away  so  you  had  to  come  back  to  your  childhood  home.  your  illustrious  career  came  crashing  down  and  you  need  a  place  to  cool  off.  you  never  left  here,  you’ve  been  here  from  the  beginning,  because  you’re  searching  for  something.  what  is  it?  what  is  the  thing  that  has  your  character  right  where  they  are  in  this  exact  moment  ? 

what  emotion  do  they  feel  the  most?  regret,  anger,  longing,  nostalgia  ?  this  helps  drive  your  characters  motives  past  and  presently.  it  also  helps  you  understand  their  goals.  what  they  want  to  achieve  and  why.  maybe  they  yearn  for  longing  and  friendship  and  connection  because  they  never  got  it  as  a  child,  whether  at  home  or  at  school.  maybe  they  regret  not  keeping  in  touch  with  their  childhood  friends  because  now  they  are  surrounded  by  people  they  can’t  trust  and  work  in  a  shitty  environment  where  you  have  to  climb  over  others  to  get  on  top.  everyone  has  a  goal.  everyone  has  an  emotion  that  drives  it.  what  is  your  characters  and  why  does  it  matter?  how  does  it  present? 

when’s  the  last  time  they  cried  and  why?  everybody  cries  and  everybody  cries  in  very  different  ways.  it  says  a  lot  about  the  emotional  state  of  a  character  and  their  emotional  health.  are  they  in  tune  with  their  emotions  and  cry  at  appropriate  times?  do  they  compartmentalise  it?  do  they  only  cry  when  angry?  dig  into  it  and  think  of  the  why  why  why.  why  does  my  character  only  cry  at  this  one  thing?  why  does  my  character  only  feel  safe  crying  alone?  why. 

what  is  your  characters  biggest  regret  in  life?  did  they  get  on  a  plane  when  they  should  have  stayed?  did  they  study  a  subject  only  because  their  parents  wanted  them  to?  did  they  not  kiss  the  girl  when  they  wanted  to?  let’s  be  honest.  our  lives  are  filled  with  “if  only  i’d  done  xyz”  .  if  only  .  this  also  provides  a  great  opportunity  to  MAKE  these  plots  and  plot  with  other  people.  now  we  can  come  up  with  exes  or  ex  best  friends  or  old  flames  or  whatever  whatever  ,  because  there’s  a  good  chance  your  character  regrets  something  that  impacts  someone  else  and  they  regret  it  BECAUSE  of  that  impact  . 

ADDITIONAL  THOUGHTS  AND  TIPS  I'VE  PICKED  UP  WHILE  RPING

honestly  the  more  “whys”  you  can  answer  for  your  character,  the  more  in  depth  you’re  getting.  in  order  for  other  people  to  understand  your  character,  you  need  to  understand  them  yourself.  you  can’t  expect  people  to  write  with  your  character  if  they  don’t  really  have  much  of  a  stable  personality  and  your  plots  don’t  make  much  sense.  remember:  plotting  should  contribute  to  your  character  and  their  development.  human  relationships  don’t  just  exist  because  we  like  them.  they  exist  because  they  serve  an  unserved  part  within  ourselves. 

genuinely  think  of  their  hobbies.  it’s  all  well  and  good  to  say  “she’s  a  bookworm  and  loves  puzzles”  “he  likes  music”  but  like.  what  does  that  actually  mean?  WHY  do  they  like  certain  things  ?  do  they  like  reading  books  or  writing?  do  they  like  fantasy  and  escapism  because  it  reminds  them  of  childhood?  do  they  listen  to  only  their  dads  favourite  music  because  they  miss  him?  do  they  make  playlists  for  niche  and  specific  moods  only  applicable  to  them?  why  are  their  hobbies  important  to  them? 

consider  their  connections,  not  just  future  but  npc  and  current.   how  would  5  close  friends  describe  them  in  one  word?  how  would  their  ex  describe  them  in  one  word?  what  is  one  thing  that  others  could  safely  always  rely  on  your  character  for  (eg  designated  driver  on  nights  out,  always  having  some  type  of  fidgeting  device,  knowing  a  phone  app  to  help  you  meditate  or  streamline  a  process  etc  etc).  we  all  exist  in  the  worlds  of  our  loved  ones,  past,  present  and  future.  we  leave  marks  with  them.  we  are  known  to  them.  so  what  is  your  character  known  and  loved  for? 

pick  your  plot  first,  not  your  fc  or  your  character.  i  know  this  sounds  counterintuitive  but  when  you  have  a  plot  for  a  character  and  a  clear  path  for  development  -  it  helps  everything  else  fall  into  place.  the  worst  thing  are  characters  that  are  plotless  (specifically  for  group  rping).  i’m  going  to  be  honest  here:  your  character  has  to  have  something  to  give  other  characters.  whether  it’s  drama,  information,  hidden  secrets,  a  connection…  your  character  has  to  have  something  of  substance.  i’d  actually  prefer  they’re  a  stereotype  then  they’re  just  aimless  and  personality-less.  when  you  have  a  big  overarching  plot  and  path  for  your  character,  it  will  not  only  help  you  plot  with  others,  but  also  help  keep  your  character  moving  and  not  JUST  reliant  on  others  to  pick  up  the  slack

rping  has  always  used  the  yes  and…?  rule.  that  extends  to  your  characters.  instead  of  yes  and…?  think  of  So…  what?  your  character  loves  to  bake.  ok.  so  what?  what  does  that  mean  for  a  thread,  or  another  character?  why  do  we  care?  maybe  we’d  care  if  your  character  bakes  experimental  stuff  and  loves  to  test  it  on  other  muses.  maybe  we’d  care  if  your  character  used  to  be  a  professional  baker  but  hasn’t  baked  lovingly  in  a  while.  maybe  we’d  care  if  your  character  is  a  baker  but  has  lost  their  charm  and  schtick  and  can’t  bake  the  way  they  used  to.  this  stuff  is  important.  don’t  just  stick  arbitrary  things  onto  your  character  and  expect  others  to  care,  especially  when  you  don’t  care  and  have  just  put  it  on  your  character  as  a  random  quirk.  that’s  not  how  people  and  humans  work.  everything  means  everything. 

your  character  doesn’t  have  to  be  likeable  but  they  do  have  to  be  memorable.  evil  nasty  girls,  manipulative  jerks…  yeah  that’s  all  ok!  but  also  you  kinda  have  to  show,  don’t  tell.  you  can’t  just  SAY  your  character  is  the  “head  bitch  in  charge”  and  then  she  never  actually  talks  or  says  anything  or  does  anything.  sorry,  but  in  order  for  me  to  see  your  character,  you  actually  have  to  write  them  or  at  the  very  least  headcanon  them.  otherwise,  they’re  just  a  blob  of  musings  in  the  ether. 

in  order  to  create  a  character  ,  you  have  to  write  your  character  .  i  see  this  a  lot  in  groups  ..  people  love  to  create  a  character  pinterest  ,  graphics  ,  aesthetics  galore  .  its  amazing  !  but  they  don't  actually  write  the  character  and  it  can  close  off  a  lot  of  opportunities  to  plot  because  people  don't  know  who  your  character  really  is  .  i  hate  to  say  it  ,  and  its  not  true  for  everyone  but  :  if  you're  relying  on  aesthetic  ,  then  you  could  be  lacking  in  the  actual  creation  and  writing  aspect  .  plus  ,  people  have  come  here  to  WRITE  with  YOU  .  not  just  see  fan  edits  of  your  character  .  write  .  write  badly  .  write  starters  ,  even  if  they  scare  you  .  write  with  people  you  don't  know  .  write  with  yourself  .  write  with  your  best  friend  .  but  you  have  to  actually  do  the  writing  part  .

[starglow-xx]

𝙨𝙞𝙩 𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙡𝙡, 𝙡𝙤𝙤𝙠 𝙥𝙧𝙚𝙩𝙩𝙮!

you were invited by your soccer star boyfriend to a blue lock event and there’s a little photo booth! how does that go?

➸ ft! isagi yoichi, bachira meguru, nagi seishiro, mikage reo, itoshi rin, itoshi sae, chigiri hyoma

a/n: kept on seeing cute couple photo booth pics on pinterest so if i have to suffer so do you <3 | also! all reference pics are fem bc that's what saved on my pinterest but no gender is specified here :)

isagi yoichi

he’s the one who spots it and asks if you want to go

sweet as always and more than happy to do it with you

thinks you’re cute when you lead him there hand in hand

the two of you spend 5 minutes going through pinterest looking for cute poses to copy

each pic is perfect and no retakes are needed, nails every inspo

10000/10 literally the cutest couple photos ever

you’re tempted to go again but you push that thought aside for now since the event is gonna start right about now

when the 2 photostrips develops you look at him with a cheeky grin

“you’re so boyfriend coded babe”

he gets sheepish, rubbing the back of his neck with pink cheeks

but he recovers quickly and kisses one of your own

“only for you”

your smile softens

“let’s come back to take some more later”

“of course!”

bachira meguru

doesn’t even tell you where he’s going and drags you by the wrist, a grin on his face

the next thing you know you’re squished in with him in the booth and he’s already selecting all the settings

the first picture is normal, the two of you close together with you leaning on him a bit

then bachira starts making goofy faces and the screen captures the pic with you mid laughter

it’s a bit shaky but it’s very you two

the next one you join him in making a silly face at the camera and then for the final one, it’s you two making a silly face at each other

you can’t help but laugh once the picture summary comes up, but regardless, you ask if he’d like to retake anything

he only grins and steals a kiss

he laughs when you get a bit red and pokes your cheek

what a little shit

“nah, don’t need to, they’re perfect”

nagi seishiro

(okay these ones are from my camera roll from playing love and deepspace LOL)

doesn’t react when you start tugging him to go somewhere

it’s routine now really, you pull and he follows

it’s less of a hassle that way

complains a bit when he has to get inside the booth because he’s just so tall

“do we have to? can’t we just…take pictures on your phone?”

you ignore his complaints to mess around with the settings and he watches you quietly

he cooperates for the most part, his face mostly indifferent but he indulges you

he throws up a lazy peace sign for one, holds you close, lets you cling to him, yk just casual boyfriend things

in the last pic you notice how he’s staring at you instead of the camera and you feel your heart warm up just a bit more

he yawns when you both exit the booth and he stares at his copy of a pics before slipping it into his pocket for safe keeping

keeps you extra close for the rest of the night

“...i guess it was worth the hassle”

mikage reo

this man is on it

had a whole ass pinterest board of cute couple photobooth inspo pics all ready waiting for the day you both stumbled across a photo booth

you teased him for it which made him sputter

“im trying to be romantic here!”

in the end you both agreed on doing the poses from IU’s “Love wins all” MV with Taehyung since you both were pretty dressed up for the event

literally couple goals reo was so proud

literally took the two photostrips and held them up with the smuggest look on his face

“i think someone owes me an apology”

you roll your eyes, but it’s playful because the pictures did look really good after all and you had fun too

it’s hard not to have fun when your boyfriend is the mikage reo after all

you press a kiss to his cheek after murmuring a soft thank you

his smile softens and he pulls you close by your waist

“of course, anything for you”

itoshi rin

says no but finds himself in the booth anyways

rin wonders how this became his life and he looks at you picking out all the settings and then he remembers why

tbh is just there when the actual taking pictures part is happening

you’re the one doing all the work and he’s like a grumpy cat

a cute one, but grumpy nonetheless

but despite all that, he lets you do whatever, pulling him close to you by the neck, squishing his cheeks, anything you please

but for the last one, in the last 5 seconds of the countdown he goes, “hey”

obviously you look at him and you squeak when his lips meet yours and then the countdown is over and the pic is taken

when he pulls away and sees your red face, a small smirk makes its way onto his face and he simply gets out of the booth to wait for you outside

not too long later, when you recover from that little stunt of his and walking away together, you tease him about wanting to kiss you

he tchs and looks away but does nothing when you hang onto his arm

“...you’re annoying”

“whatever you say rin rin!”

“never say that again”

itoshi sae

sae didn’t really have a reason to be here, not really but he was there at the blue lock event anyways

the only thing making it bearable was that he was allowed a plus one

if he had to suffer, at least you’d be there too

although he probably could’ve told you about it a bit sooner and time to prepare

you were a little annoyed obviously, but you seemed fine and he thought that was that

no it was not

your little way of getting some sort of vengeance was dragging him into the photobooth

sae deadpans bc why did a blue lock event even have this anyways

“fine, just once”

and for half of them, he’s looking at you instead of the camera

you keep both copies in your purse for safe keeping but when you get home later, can’t find the other one and ask him about it, he tries to gaslight you into thinking you only printed one copy and just being clumsy by remembering wrong

you see right through it anyways and have the biggest shit eating grin on your face

“itoshi sae you have the other copy don’t you?”

“...i don’t”

“sae”

he’s lucky he’s pretty

chigiri hyoma

is totally down

but takes like 5 minutes fixing his hair using the mirror attached to the side of the booth

“hyoma your hair is literally already styled because of the event”

“don’t rush me”

you don’t use any reference pictures and just go with the flow but they turn out really good anyways

your boyfriend seems to think so too and doesn’t let you leave and instead selects all the settings to go again

“looks like someone is excited”

“shut up, the countdown started again”

chigiri is just naturally photogenic so you can’t help but stare at all the pictures after they’re printed, but you also look back and forth between them and him

you’re not being subtle so he takes the chance to teasing you but you manage to turn it around

“i was just thinking that you look better in person”

“wha–”

you stick out your tongue at him playfully and with faint red cheeks, he sighs but it’s fond

the photo booth at this event kickstarted your shared new photo booth pic collection together

a/n: lowkey had this sitting in my drafts for a few days...it was completed but yall finding pictures was hard (i know looking at pictures on pinterest inspired this was but it was still hard) and formatting is sucky too but BAH i hope yall liked this anyways <3

as always, reblogs and shares are appreciated! i hope you all stay safe! and just in case nobody told you they loved you today, i love you! you are enough! <3

writing belongs to me! please do not plagiarize, repost, or translate on here or any other sites!

[meazalykov]

back to pink

alexia putellas x cosmetologist!reader

summary: you persuade ale to change her hairstyle again

love, comfort, fluff

the sun spills into your studio in soft rays, casting a warm glow over the room as you adjust your station, your hands automatically going through the motions of preparing your tools. 

you've always loved the quiet of the afternoons here. it’s your space, your little sanctuary, and today, it feels even more special with alexia sitting in your chair.

she’s been with you for nearly an hour now, scrolling through her phone, the corners of her lips slightly curled upward in that way that tells you she’s thinking of something amusing. 

your heart flutters every time you catch her looking up at you through the mirror, her soft eyes full of a quiet warmth that only you get to see when she’s completely relaxed. 

your relationship has always been like this, full of easy silences and stolen glances that say more than words ever could.

"so," you say, turning to face her with a comb in hand, "what’s the plan for today? keeping it simple, or are we doing something big?"

alexia leans back in the chair, setting her phone aside as she gives you a thoughtful look. 

"i want a change," she says, her voice carrying that familiar mix of playfulness and seriousness that always keeps you on your toes.

"oh, a change? are we talking drastic?" you ask, moving behind her and running your fingers through her hair, admiring how soft it feels under your touch. thanks to you of course.

it’s natural for you now, this closeness between the two of you. she’s always been comfortable with you, ever since that first appointment years ago.

a grin tugs at your lips as a memory surfaces. "how about we go pink again?" you joke, remembering the bold look she had two years ago, right after the two of you first met. 

alexia had come in for a hair appointment, and you’d convinced her—half-jokingly, half-serious—to try something wild. she had agreed to pink, and you had been in awe of how stunning she looked with it. it was also the day she’d asked you out, and the rest, as they say, is history.

alexia tilts her head back, her grin mirroring yours. "you know... i was actually thinking about that."

you blink, pausing mid-comb. "wait, seriously? you want pink again?"

"yeah," she says, completely nonchalant. "it’s been a while, and i think it could be fun."

"alexia," you laugh, shaking your head, "i was kidding! you really want to go pink again?"

"why not?" she shrugs, her eyes sparkling with amusement. "you liked it, didn’t you?"

"you looked incredible," you admit, your mind already racing with the logistics of recreating that look. "but are you sure? i mean, it’s... pink."

"i’m sure," she says, her voice unwavering. "besides, it’ll be our little anniversary surprise."

you tilt your head, feeling a warmth spread through your chest. she always has a way of making even the simplest moments feel special, like this isn’t just about her hair but about the memories you’ve shared. 

"okay, pink it is," you say, setting the comb down and grabbing the dye and developer from your station."

but don’t say i didn’t warn you if people start obsessing over it again."

"let them obsess," she chuckles, leaning back in the chair with a content sigh. "i’m used to it by now."

“don’t get cocky!” you joke. 

you start by sectioning her hair with careful precision, your fingers moving with the kind of practiced ease that comes from years of experience. you've always taken pride in your work, but when it’s alexia in your chair, it feels different—like there’s a personal connection to every strand, every detail.

you mix the dye, the vibrant pink color swirling in the bowl as you stir it to the perfect consistency. as you begin applying it to her hair, your mind drifts back to that first time you met her. 

you had known who she was—alexia putellas, the star of barcelona, the captain everyone admired. but sitting in your chair back then, she wasn’t just the footballer the world knew. she was charming, sweet, and surprisingly easy to talk to. 

by the end of the appointment, she had made the first move, asking you to dinner. you had been so flustered, you nearly dropped the hot curling iron.

"remember the first time i did this?" you ask, your voice soft as you work the dye into her hair.

alexia hums in response, her eyes closed as she relaxes under your touch. "how could i forget? i’ve never seen anyone so flustered."

"hey," you protest lightly, "you’re the one who asked me out! i wasn’t expecting it."

"i know," she murmurs, a smile playing on her lips. "but you said yes."

"of course i did," you say, leaning down slightly to press a quick kiss to the top of her head. 

"who could say no to you?"

the dyeing process is methodical, almost therapeutic in its routine. you make sure every section is coated evenly, massaging the color in with gentle hands, knowing exactly how long to let it sit. 

time passes in a comfortable silence, the only sounds being the occasional hum of your tools and the quiet rustle of fabric as alexia shifts in the chair.

when the dye has set, you rinse her hair, feeling the softness return as the pink starts to emerge. it’s vibrant, bold, and so uniquely her. 

once her hair is clean, you blow-dry it with a round brush, giving it volume and soft waves that cascade down her back. 

finally, you step back, admiring your work.

"all done," you say, turning her chair around to face the mirror.

alexia’s eyes widen as she stares at herself in the reflection. she runs her fingers through the pink strands, her smile growing wider with each second. 

"wow..." she breathes, her voice filled with awe. "it’s perfect."

"you’re obsessed," you tease, watching her admire her new look with a gleam in her eye.

"can you blame me?" she grins, twisting a curl around her finger. "it’s brighter than last time."

before you can say anything more, the door to your studio swings open, and you hear familiar voices fill the room. 

mapi and ingrid stroll in, their conversation cutting off the second they see alexia.

"what the—" mapi gasps, her eyes immediately zeroing in on alexia’s hair. "are you serious? you did it again?"

ingrid steps closer, her face lighting up with admiration. 

"you look amazing," she says, her voice soft with awe. "the pink is perfect on you."

alexia laughs, clearly enjoying the reaction. "thanks," she says, running a hand through her hair, showing it off. 

"but it’s a secret. you can’t tell anyone on the team yet."

"oh, we won’t," mapi grins, her eyes flicking to you with a mischievous glint. 

"but i have to say, y/n you outdid yourself this time."

"what can i say? she’s got good taste," you reply with a wink, though you feel a surge of pride at their compliments.

alexia chuckles, still gazing at herself in the mirror, clearly enamored with the pink. "i love it," 

she murmurs, her voice softening as she turns to look at you. "thank you, amor."

you step closer, your heart fluttering at the affectionate term. "always happy to help," you say, reaching out to smooth a stray curl behind her ear. 

"but seriously, you look incredible."

she stands up from the chair, taking a moment to admire her reflection one last time before turning back to you. "you’re incredible," she murmurs, leaning in to press a soft kiss to your lips. "and now... i can’t wait for our anniversary. this is going to be a surprise no one sees coming."

you smile against her lips, your heart full. "i can't wait either." 

my masterlist is here if you want to read more!

[dgttwisted]

Kin!

(all of the art is from @mellosdrawings thank your for drawing my boi!)

Name: Kin Vanrouge formerlym0000984626

Birthday: June 26

Age:????

species:????

Hight: 5'10

childhood

Kin was created in a lab he was one of many that came before him the blood of the fallen dragon queen a star fea an the blood of a long forgotten creation made from none other then the fabled Jumba Jookiba that these scientists can only hope there creations will be half as good as his.

experiment after experiment most died before the age of 7 there bodies couldn't contain the magic they tried to use. they feared that Kin would be the same they would inject their drugs an magic enhancers in the same place's on his neck day in an day our before an after every test. thus leaving a mark on his neck permanently scarred.

on one of these tests they wanted to see his physical capabilities they had set a obstacle rigorous course. the wall that was there was 20 feet they thought that it would contain him Kin scaled that wall like a spider an ran.

Ran as fast an as far as his little legs would carry him, which was for two days an nights straight until he smelt something yummy an ran to the source it was a basket on a blanket he tore threw it like scrap paper an ate the source of the smell it was a tuna sandwich. his ears shot up he heard movement an tried to run for it thinking it was the scientist's.

Only to be grabbed by the scruff of his shirt "whats this? the little thing that stole our food that Silver lovingly prepared tries to run for it!?"

undenounced to Kin Lilia an Silver were on a picnic together an Silver made the food an was very happy how they turned out. well whatever Silver an Lilia were expecting him to say it certainly wasn't-

"I WAS FUCKING HUNGRY OK!!! I HADN'T EATEN IN TWO FUCKING DAYS!!" Lilia almost laughed but he was trying to be a decent role model...he did put him in time out an by time out a bath because he stunk which Kin hated he cried the whole time.

Lilia didn't know what he would do about him an decided he'd figure it out the tomorrow they had tucked him in the guest bedroom only to hear screaming not to long after Lilia an Silver went to check on him an Kin was on the ceiling eyes glowing green frightened.

"N-No more!!! NO MORE SHOTS!!"

"we don't have shots" Silver said calmly

"but the ones that do will come for me, they'll hold me down an if i don't listen they use the hose!!"

"my dad is the strongest he won't let that happen an neither will i" little silver walked over an out reached his hand "promise"

Kin detached him self from the ceiling "p-promise?"

"promise"

Silver slept with Kin that night an for the first time in Kin's life he had a good sleep.

during the following morning Lilia was already hatching a plan he just had to do a few things first.

"tell me what's your name?"

"0000984626"

"yea no your name is Kin from now on!"

"Kin?" he looked confused

"yup that you, your name is Kin an Silver over here is your brother from now on you have a family!"

Silver held his hand an gave him a gentle smile

Kin started crying "f-fuck.....why won't they stop" Silver hugged him to let him know it was all going to be ok now.

Lilia had Malleus an Matilda watch them while he went on a errand an by errand i mean tracking Kins trail to find where he came from sneak into the building find Kin's files to see what he is an what horrible things they have done to him before killing every one in the lab an setting it on fire only keeping the medical file to help with Kin's development.

living/growing up with Silver Lilia an Sebek was the perfect environment for him to thrive in. he wasn't scared for his life an living with Lilia taught Kin to cook really early in life...among other such things.

he wants to help others but doesn't realize just how monsterly strong he is compared to most kids around his age. not that Lilia didn't know how to deal with it if anyone could teach a youngster how to control is strength its him. now for the language an his need to be a gremlin on the other hand? Lilia quite enjoyed his mischief an nothing made him laugh more then hearing Kin swear he wondered if those bastard scientist's were the reason for his fowl language but decided not to worry about it.

school life

Kin has very good grades in both academics an in physical activates at school but he also has the most detentions for reasons that are pretty obvious to most.

even now his cursing streak remains its engraved in him at this point. that hasn't stopped certain prefects from trying to stop it an on that note.

Heartslabyul

Riddle hates his languge posture an deminer would collar him more if he wasn't in someone else's dorm. despite how much Riddle loaths Kin, Kin thinks that Riddle is a cool guy a second year like him became a prefect just from excellent grades alone. he only wishes thats how it worked at his dorm.

Catar has tried to get a selfie with Kin but to no avail

"are you camera shy?"

"if i say yes will you leave me the fuck alone?"

this is what Kin looks like with his hair back he has always found his eyes scarry an so assumes that no one would want to see them either.

despite Catars an Trey's warning Ace did try to mess with Kin once what did he get for his troubles? all of his left side shoes are gone he bought a new pair an the left shoe was gone the next day after Trey had Ace apologize were the shoes magically returned though with way more dirt on them then before.

Deuce actually gets along with Kin ok an Kin on more then one occasion has tried tutoring Deuce because he can tell he is trying to be better at his studies.

Savanaclaw

the dorm he was placed in which makes him Leona's problem strong an smart as he is Kins social skills seem to be lacking not that he is much better only when he needs to be. Leona will be his role model an by that Leona actually means put him into a headlock an make him do push ups when he fucks up.

Ruggie finds Kin very useful because he can make what looks like junk to most into useful items an machinery in the blink of an eye.

"you ever think you have been placed in the wrong dorm?"

Kin lifts the stadium bench seats to help some students look for the disk that flung underneath it "why you think this dorm isn't a fit for you" Kin assumes Ruggie was referring to himself when he said that.

"....never mind"

Jack an Kin exercise a lot together

"you seem to be naturally strong but you keep up with a routine anyway?"

"well fuck yea? my pops would kill me if i slacked off!" pops being lilia

Octavinelle

Azul has been trying to be Kin's "friend" sense year one for the benefits of course Kin has made computers but also electric cars an bikes an he just hands them out for free to his friends think of the profit he could be making Azul wants to make that profit. but Kin doesn't like his vibe or how he talks to him so he usually avoids him like the plague.

Floyd is an interesting case on how they met an became "best buddy's" one day they had class at the school pool so of course Floyd was transformed into his merfolk form but Kin was only sitting on the edge he wouldn't even put his feet in the pool he heard some of the students say he got a note so he doesn't need to actually go in the pool to pass the grade.

he swam up to him "hmm shrimp, coral ,seaweed?" he mumbled to himself trying to figure out what to call at the time he though was some dead weight

"the fuck you mumbling about?"

Floyd grinned, oh yea he was just asking to be messed with "can't swim?"

"none of your fucking business-" Floyd used his tail an dragged him him into the pool he expected some flailing an perhaps he be yelled at by the teacher.

instead one of Kin's hands grabbed Floyd into place despite how slippery his body is in water didn't seem to matter much to Kin. Kin upper cutted him threw the water an sent Floyd flying out of the pool an Kin sinking on the deep end on his side.

vargus had to pull Kin out of the pool before scolding him for fighting him he scolded Floyd later after he woke up in the nurses office with the biggest welt on his chin.

"Jade i met a mantis shrimp today!"

"oh? must be pretty big if he sent you flying"

"mantis shrimp!! he's only a head taller the goldfish he is so funny!"

after this incident is how Jade got familiar with Kin an how hilarious he is as a person normally not one to keep notes unless its good blackmail material he got some rather great moments he's witnessed.

"𝓉𝑜𝒹𝒶𝓎 𝒦𝒾𝓃 𝒶𝓉𝑒 𝒶𝓃 𝑜𝓇𝒶𝓃𝑔𝑒 𝓅𝑒𝑒𝓁 𝒶𝓃 𝒶𝓁𝓁 𝓁𝒾𝓀𝑒 𝒶𝓃 𝒶𝓅𝓅𝓁𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒹𝒾𝒻𝒻𝑒𝓇𝑒𝓃𝒸𝑒 𝒾𝓃 𝓉𝒶𝓈𝓉𝑒 𝒶𝓃 𝓉𝑒𝓍𝓉𝓊𝓇𝑒 𝒹𝒾𝒹𝓃'𝓉 𝓈𝑒𝑒𝓂 𝓉𝑜 𝓈𝓉𝑜𝓅 𝒽𝒾𝓂 𝒾𝓃 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓈𝓁𝒾𝑔𝒽𝓉𝑒𝓈𝓉"

"𝓈𝒶𝓌 𝒦𝒾𝓃 𝒷𝓊𝓇𝓎𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝒶 𝒷𝓊𝓃𝒸𝒽 𝑜𝒻 𝓈𝒽𝑜𝑒𝓈 𝓉𝑜𝒹𝒶𝓎 𝑜𝓃 𝒸𝓁𝑜𝓈𝑒𝓇 𝒾𝓃𝓋𝑒𝓈𝓉𝒾𝑔𝒶𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓎 𝓌𝑒𝓇𝑒 𝒶𝓁𝓁 𝒹𝒾𝒻𝒻𝑒𝓇𝑒𝓃𝓉 𝓈𝒾𝓏𝑒𝓈 𝒶𝓃 𝒻𝓇𝑜𝓂 𝒹𝒾𝒻𝒻𝑒𝓇𝑒𝓃𝓉 𝓅𝒶𝒾𝓇𝓈 𝒷𝓊𝓉 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝑜𝓃𝓁𝓎 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓎 𝒽𝒶𝓋𝑒 𝒾𝓃 𝒸𝑜𝓂𝓂𝑜𝓃 𝒾𝓈 𝓉𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓎 𝓌𝑒𝓇𝑒 𝒶𝓁𝓁 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓁𝑒𝒻𝓉 𝓈𝒽𝑜𝑒𝓈"

"𝒾 𝑜𝒻𝒻𝑒𝓇𝑒𝒹 𝒦𝒾𝓃 𝒶 𝓂𝓊𝓈𝒽𝓇𝑜𝑜𝓂 𝒶𝓃 𝓁𝒾𝓀𝑒 𝒶 𝑒𝓍𝓅𝑒𝒸𝓉𝑒𝒹 𝒽𝑒 𝒶𝒸𝒸𝑒𝓅𝓉𝑒𝒹 𝓌𝒾𝓉𝒽𝑜𝓊𝓉 𝓆𝓊𝑒𝓈𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃 𝒷𝓊𝓉 𝒷𝑒𝒻𝑜𝓇𝑒 𝒾 𝒸𝑜𝓊𝓁𝒹 𝒸𝑜𝑜𝓀 𝒾𝓉 𝒽𝑒 𝒿𝓊𝓈𝓉 𝒶𝓉𝑒 𝒾𝓉 𝑜𝓊𝓉 𝑜𝒻 𝓂𝓎 𝒽𝒶𝓃𝒹, 𝒾𝓈 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓈 𝓌𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝒶 𝒹𝑜𝑔 𝑜𝓌𝓃𝑒��� 𝒻𝑒𝑒𝓁𝓈 𝓁𝒾𝓀𝑒 𝒾 𝓌𝑜𝓃𝒹𝑒𝓇?"

"𝒾 𝒶𝓈𝓀𝑒𝒹 𝒽𝒾𝓂 𝓉𝑜𝒹𝒶𝓎 𝒾𝒻 𝒽𝑒 𝓌𝑜𝓊𝓁𝒹 𝓁𝒾𝓀𝑒 𝓉𝑜 𝑔𝑜 𝑜𝓃 𝒶 𝒽𝒾𝓀𝑒 𝒿𝓊𝓈𝓉 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓉𝓌𝑜 𝑜𝒻 𝓊𝓈 𝒶𝓃 𝒽𝑒 𝒶𝑔𝓇𝑒𝑒𝒹 𝒽𝑒 𝓈𝑒𝑒𝓂𝑒𝒹 𝓆𝓊𝒾𝓉𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝓇𝒾𝓁𝓁𝑒𝒹 𝒷𝓎 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒾𝒹𝑒𝒶 𝒽𝑒 𝓈𝑒𝑒𝓂𝓈 𝓉𝑜 𝓈𝒽𝑜𝓌 𝓃𝑜 𝓈𝒾𝑔𝓃𝓈 𝑜𝒻 𝒸𝒶𝓊𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃 𝑜𝓇 𝒻𝑒𝒶𝓇 𝓉𝑜𝓌𝒶𝓇𝒹𝓈 𝓂𝑒 𝒷𝓊𝓉 𝒸𝑜𝓃𝓈𝒾𝒹𝑒𝓇𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝒽𝒾𝓈 𝓈𝓉𝓇𝑒𝓃𝑔𝓉𝒽 𝒽𝑒 𝒾𝓈 𝓂𝑜𝓇𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓃 𝓁𝒾𝓀𝑒𝓁𝓎 𝓃𝑜𝓉 𝓌𝑜𝓇𝓇𝒾𝑒𝒹 𝒶𝒷𝑜𝓊𝓉 𝓂𝑜𝓈𝓉 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃𝑔𝓈 𝒷𝑒𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝒶𝒷𝓁𝑒 𝓉𝑜 𝒽𝓊𝓇𝓉 𝒽𝒾𝓂"

"𝒹𝓊𝓇𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒽𝒾𝓀𝑒 𝒶 𝓉𝓇𝒾𝒶𝓁 𝒾 𝒽𝒶𝒹 𝒷𝑒𝑒𝓃 𝑜𝓃 𝓂𝒶𝓃𝓎 𝓉𝒾𝓂𝑒𝓈 𝒷𝑒𝒻𝑜𝓇𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓈 𝑜𝓊𝓉𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝒾 𝒽𝒶𝒹 𝑔𝑜𝓉𝓉𝑒𝓃 𝒾𝓃𝒿𝓊𝓇𝑒𝒹 𝒾𝓃 𝒶 𝓇𝒶𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓇 𝑒𝓂𝒷𝒶𝓇𝓇𝒶𝓈𝓈𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓂𝒶𝓃𝓃𝑒𝓇 𝓉𝓌𝒾𝓈𝓉𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓂𝓎 𝒶𝓃𝓀𝓁𝑒, 𝒦𝒾𝓃 𝓃𝑜𝓉 𝑜𝓃𝓁𝓎 𝒸𝒶𝓇𝓇𝒾𝑒𝒹 𝓂𝑒 𝒷𝓊𝓉 𝒶𝓁𝓁 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒸𝒶𝓂𝓅𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓈𝓊𝓅𝓅𝓁𝒾𝑒𝓈 𝓌𝒽𝒾𝓁𝑒 𝒽𝑒 𝓌𝒶𝓈 𝒸𝒶𝓇𝓇𝓎𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓂𝑒 𝒾 𝒸𝑜𝓊𝓁𝒹 𝓈𝑒𝑒 𝒽𝒾𝓈 𝒾𝓃𝓀𝓎 𝒷𝓁𝒶𝒸𝓀 𝑒𝓎𝑒𝓈 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓎 𝓌𝑒𝓇𝑒 𝓆𝓊𝒾𝓉𝑒 𝑒𝓃𝒸𝒽𝒶𝓃𝓉𝒾𝓃𝑔, 𝒽𝑜𝓌𝑒𝓋𝑒𝓇 𝓌𝒽𝑒𝓃 𝒾 𝒶𝓈𝓀𝑒𝒹 𝒦𝒾𝓃 𝒶𝒷𝑜𝓊𝓉 𝓁𝒶𝓉𝑒𝓇 𝒽𝑒 𝒶𝓅𝑜𝓁𝑜𝑔𝒾𝓏𝑒𝒹 𝓈𝒶𝓎𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝒽𝑒 𝒾𝓈 𝓈𝑜𝓇𝓇𝓎 𝒽𝑒 𝒽𝒶𝒹 𝓉𝑜 𝓈𝑒𝑒 𝓈𝑜𝓂𝑒𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓈𝑜 𝓈𝒸𝒶𝓇𝓎 𝓌𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝒶 𝒻𝓊𝓃𝓃𝓎 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓉𝑜 𝓈𝒶𝓎"

"𝒦𝒾𝓃 𝒷𝓊𝒾𝓁𝓉 𝓂𝑒 𝒶𝓃 𝑒𝓁𝑒𝒸𝓉𝓇𝒾𝒸 𝒷𝒾𝓀𝑒 𝓉𝑜𝒹𝒶𝓎 𝐹𝓁𝑜𝓎𝒹 𝓈𝑒𝑒𝓂𝑒𝒹 𝓉𝑜 𝒷𝑒 𝓇𝒶𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓇 𝓂𝒾𝒻𝒻𝑒𝒹 𝓉𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝒾 𝑔𝑜𝓉 𝑜𝓃𝑒 𝒶𝓃 𝓃𝑜𝓉 𝒽𝒾𝓂 𝒷𝑒𝒸𝒶𝓊𝓈𝑒 𝒻𝓇𝑜𝓂 𝓌𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝒽𝑒 𝒽𝑒𝒶𝓇𝒹 𝒦𝒾𝓃 𝑜𝓃𝓁𝓎 𝒹𝑜𝑒𝓈 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓈 𝓈𝑜𝓇𝓉 𝑜𝒻 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓉𝑜 𝓉𝒽𝑜𝓈𝑒 𝒽𝑒 𝒸𝑜𝓃𝓈𝒾𝒹𝑒𝓇𝓈 𝒻𝓇𝒾𝑒𝓃𝒹𝓈 𝒾 𝑔𝓊𝑒𝓈𝓈 𝒾 𝓈𝒽𝑜𝓊𝓁𝒹 𝒷𝑒 𝒽𝑜𝓃𝑜𝓇𝑒𝒹 𝒽𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃𝓀𝓈 𝑜𝒻 𝓂𝑒 𝓈𝑜 𝒽𝒾𝑔𝒽𝓁𝓎…𝒾 𝒶𝒹𝓂𝒾𝓉 𝒾 𝓌𝒶𝓃𝓉 𝓉𝑜 𝒷𝑒 𝓂𝑜𝓇𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓃 𝒿𝓊𝓈𝓉 𝒽𝒾𝓈 𝒻𝓇𝒾𝑒𝓃𝒹"

Scarabia

Kalim wants Kin to hang out with him more often an invite him to all the parties he hold but Jamil usually tells him no thinking Kin is a bad influence just from his language. Kalim will usually invite him anyway

"thank you for teaching Jamil's bullies some lessons without violence"

"you don't need to mention it, i did it because i wanted to...you didn't have to throw me a party"

"well i did it because i wanted to" hugs his arm

"fuck can't argue you with you there kehe"

they are friends Jamil can't fathom it an didn't know that Kin was harassing his bullies to get them to stop until Leona told him because he has caught Kin in the act of burying peoples shoes.

Pomefiore

Vil despises Kin he badly wants to give him much needed skin an hair care an for him to stop covering his eyes. he hates his langue most of all he swears like a sailor an how Epel wants to be more like him. he has on many occasions told Leona to keep his underclassmen in check.

Rook thinks hes very neat wants to know why he is the way he is but much like when he tried to egg Lilia on Malleus an Matilda stop him from doing so. he will just have to watch him from afar.

Epel admires him so much his strength the fact he says whatever hes about to say regardless of who he is talking to. he thinks he so manly like Leona, Kin doesn't Epel or anyone looking up to him he knows he's a mess an doesn't want anyone catching that from him.

Ignihyde

Idia is curious on why Kin seems to be incapable of getting blot whenever he over uses magic he bleeds from his eyes an nose but no blot. he seems to have two unique magic's one that deals incredible amounts of elemental an physical damage which in turn causes him to bleed an the other which seems to heal him of all his injuries as if none of it happened. one thing is clear Kin is added to the list of people he doesn't want to be stuck in a room with.

Ortho wants Kin to join there dorm he thinks he would be an excellent addition Idia disagrees. Kin thinks that Ortho is really neat but doesn't want to bring up the question on how he is made because he is afraid that might be rude to ask a robot.

Diasomnia

what all of his family is in another dorm that doesn't sting him emotionally that he wasn't chosen to be in the same dorm why would you ask?

Malleus as well as Matilda have always treated Kin like there little cousin whenever he did any achievement regardless of how minor they would give him head pats an praise him. Matilda used to carry him in her arms when he was little whenever he had nightmares she would do this to sooth him sense unlike Malleus she's never had much of a singing voice. Matilda has tried to do this now but Kin insists he doesn't need them anymore.

This makes Sebek extremely jealous of that treatment an would try to outdo him an Silver at every turn. Kin is stronger not becuse he wants to be but beucse of how he was made so small things that would be easy for most kids were hard for Kin like holding a fork without breaking it which would lead him to swear more which lead Sebek to try an scold an brade him about it "Knights don't swear!" Kin had to cover his ears his yelling hurt his ears an still does today.

Silver an Kin have always gotten along an still do to this day Kin helps him study for all the classes he fell asleep in which is usually all of them. an Silver tries to help Kin swear less as well as remember not to call Lilia pops in front of people.

Lilia is very proud of his angry gremlin child he has come a long way sense when he first found him stealing his food to get by. he doesn't care what people say about his language he knows it was way worse as a kid.

ramshackle

Kin accsidently yelled at Lilith by mistake an is to ashamed to even look at her. she hasn't told anyone an if Leona or Vil found out they would skin him alive.

[legend-the-dumb-jock]

“Come on bro! It won’t be for long ! What do you say!?” Erik had been pestering Jake for a while now. Always with the same question. He a big beefy man. Muscular but he didn’t care about the slim and trim look. Indulging in life’s pleasures he has a massive tank of a gut. Jake on the other hand was very different. Working out. Eating healthy. And Jake was tired of his friend constantly pleading with him. “Fine. But not for long ! Ok!?” Erik’s eyes lit up with anticipation. “Deal! I can’t wait ! This is going to be so fun! Plus I only wanted to know what it would be like to be in your body for a little bit. And you gotta admit. I’m sure you wanna see what this is like…” he said as he patted his gut. And Jake couldn’t deny it…he did want to see what it was like.

Erik hand him a piece of paper and drew a ritual circle. Barry big enough to the two of them. Then Erik turned to him “ok start chanting with me !” And the te began. Reading the chant and then soon saying the chant to each other. Over and over…. “We ask you switch our bodies, make it be!” And a bright light appeared engulfing the whole room.

Jake felt heavy for the first time. Heavy and grounded. When the light dissipated he looked down and seen nothing but the hairy bulking body of Erik. As body he was now in. “Wow this is awesome bro!” Erik yelled. “I feel like I can do anything!” He jumped up and down without issue. Jake could feel sweat beading down his back and chest. “Bro why are you sweaty ! Is it like this all the time!?” Jame asked. Erik laughed “yeah just about the entire day. You’ll want to cope with it though.” Jake walked to the couch to sit and felt like he would get out of breath. “Well. It’s only for a little while. A week tops. Ok?” He said to Erik who was flexing and acting goofy. “Yeah yeah a week. Oh! And don’t forget. While you’re in my body you need to keep my routine up.” He said as he handed James a large protein shake made with extra heavy cream. “And I’ll do the same for you!”

—————————

After that first day the two best friends parted. Jake stayed in Erik’s apartment and vice versa. The first day was a struggle for Jake. Getting used to the bulking form Erik had. Taking up a lot more space than he was used to. Floor boards creaked under his weight and when he sat down on his couch he had to heavy himself off. And almost as if on clocked work he would get the text telling him “don’t forget to drink the shakes bro! Gotta keep my body perfect”

Jake had even developed a taste for the shakes. At first he had to make himself drink them. But now he couldn’t get enough. He would find himself in the kitchen late at night having multiple shakes.

He would message Erik about day to day tasks and Erik would just support him.

“Hey big guy look at how awesome I’m keeping your body looking” Jake would see. Erik was really enjoying himself in his body. Jake would look at the pictures he would get and rub his hairy hard gut and he found that sometimes he would even get hard looking at them. He couldn’t wait to be back in his body.

—————————-

Jake walked into his apartment and braced himself on the wall. “Bro. You didn’t tell me the elevator was out! I just had to walk up 7 flights of steps!” He was breathing heavy. The massive gut expanding with each breath. Sweat was dripping from his body staining the shirt he was wearing. “Oh yeah bro sorry about that I just got carried away!” Erik said as he was finishing up a set of crunches. Jake couldn’t help but love looking at his body. So fit and muscular. “Wow big guy! Look at you! Did you make my body gain weight!?” He jumped to his feet, walked to Jake and poked at his exposed naval. “Hey I couldn’t help it those shakes are so good. I’ve already had one today !!” Erik just laughed and said “well good. I’m glad you enjoy them.” Erik took Jake to the kitchen table and showed him the pizzas and wings he got for them “don’t worry Jake. This is for you. I’m on a strict diet right now so only rice and chicken for me”. Jake began eating and was in love with all the flavors he was tasting.

“Ok Jake. So to get this swap to work, we need to be naked. And we will need to say this” he handed the paper to Jake. Erik smiled at him. When he was done eating they both stood on the living room. In the circle. “Erik this circle seems smaller now” Jake said and Erik just giggled “hey big guy, it’s not my fault if you managed to pack on a few pounds”. Jake blushed. He knew Erik was right. But all the more reason to get this swap over with. Jake was so sweaty I this body. And even though he just ate he could already feel himself getting hungry again.

The two men began to chant. Jake the. Realized that Erik was just staring at him so he stopped. “Bro what gives ? Come on”. Erik put his hand on the abs he adorned and looked down. Then back at Jake. “Jake. I like having abs and all this extra energy…. Is there anything you like about my body?” He was serious. He wanted to stop the ritual for this. “I mean. It’s definitely not the muscular one I am used to.” Looking down and rubbing his hairy gut “and this….this is definitely a lot to handle”. Erik was rubbing his hands up and down the abs on Jake’s body. And Jake began to get hard. “I see you like this Jake. Me playing with this body.” He began to pinch his nipples as his own cock began to get hard. “How much do you like this ?” Jake couldn’t help was watch. His own dick getting watching his body play with itself under Jake’s control. “Come on Jake. Give your own cock a good suck before we swap.” Jake dropped to his knees as if on command. The floor boards creaking under his giant weight. Erik put his dick in his old mouth and began to face fuck Jake. “Yeah Jake. You like this don’t you. Sucking your own cock. You love it don’t you. I love it!” Jake began to scream. He pulled out and started rubbing his hand up and down the shaft. “Go on Jake. Tell me how much you like that body you’re in”. And Jake found himself saying stuff he never thought he would. “I love the intense appetite. I love all this hair and sweat. I love being so massive that it makes me struggle to do stuff. I love getting out breath. I love this body Erik!” All the while Erik was rubbing his cock. And then when Jake finished talking Erik slammed his cock back in his mouth. “Yeah you do. You love being that body don’t you! You love being me !” He held Jake’s head to his cock as he shot loads down his throat. Making him swallow. The. Erik began to chant. Holding Jake’s head on his hard cock. Choking him. Preventing him speaking. Jake tried to pulled away but he couldn’t. He was stuck! All while Jake chanted a speak that sealed them in each others bodies.

“There Jake. Now you can love being in my body for the rest of your life and I’ll enjoy this one.” Jake tried to protest but Erik wouldn’t hear it. “You love the body so much Jake. You’re stuck in it now!”

Jake was left in a hairy sweaty mess on the living room floor while Erik turned on the tv. Grabbed some chicken and rice and just watching him. Opening his legs he said “come on ERIK come suck !” And defeatedly. The new Erik did as he was told.

————

Inspired by story https://www.tumblr.com/legend-the-dumb-jock/765534590247026688

[glow-in-the-dark-death]

You Remind Me Of Her

~

"Jason wake up I want to go see the new store!"

He felt his blankets get tugged off of him. Groaning he scrunched his face into the bed.

" Let me sleep another hour or two, it was late when I got in bed."

" And who's fault is that?"

He grabbed the nearest pillow to him and flung it to where the voice was coming from, even with perfect aim he wasn't surprised when he heard it connect with his wall and not a body.

"Yours! If you hadn't dragged me with you to look for those old music disk with you I would have gotten to bed earlier."

"Liar you would still have gone to bed late for whatever other reason."

He sat up rubbing his eyes, hissing slightly when he opened them not expecting his lights to already be on.

"Okay, what store are you making me go to today Martha?"

He dodged a swat to the back of his head. Grinning he headed towards the kitchen hearing her huff and following him.

"How many times do I have to tell you to call me grandma! Honestly, you're worse than a nipping dog"

"Well at least I'm not emotionally constipated like Bruce"

"True, but we're not speaking about my son right now we're speaking about you. Now hurry up! I saw the prettiest set of crystal glass cut tea set by the window when I was passing by!"

"Give me like 8 minutes to eat and get ready okay, will grampa be joining us?"

He turned to look at her in the eyes

Her green eyes, just barely glowing. The rest of her being transparent like fog in the early morning, her heels floating a few inches of the floor.

Martha Wayne his grandmother

His dead grandmother now a ghost

Just like he used to be

~

He walked into the small store the small bells jingling above his head.

"Look Jason they have such pretty things!"

His eyes followed her as she floated over to the display case. Quickly he took his phone and held it up to is ear.

"Which one's were the ones that caught your eye?'

He developed the habit of speaking into the phone when he was outside in public view while speaking with a ghost, that way nobody would give him a second glance looking like a normal phone call.

"The one with lilies and forget-me-not's."

His eyes quickly found the pieces and grabbed them. He looked at her from the corner of his eye.

"Is this all you wanted from here?"

The 'Do you want to continue looking?' in his gaze. She gave a quick glance around before turning back to him.

"No just that for today, we can come back another day when you don't have plans."

Jason glanced at her while he quickly paid. Leaving the store he turned to fully look at her while still having his phone up to his ear.

"Plans? I don't have any plans for today?"

A sly grin made its way on to her face

"Well I thought it's been a while since you visited Alfred and since we're in the area we might as well visit, no?"

Jason sighed, " Fine, only because it has been a while plus if I don't go you'll just keep naggin' me."

Martha gave a small huff of amusement

"That's my boy! Now! Let's get some nice tea for our visit, it would be rude to go empty handed, how about some nice cinnamon tea huh?"

"Your obsession with cinnamon tea has started to spread to me, especially the weird way you like it."

"Gasp! It's not that weird, honestly I started drinking it like that because of my cravings while I was pregnant and just never stopped. But don't lie to me, you like it just as much as I do even with the peach jam."

"Fine maybe I do."

He looked down at the time, "Let's hurry up a buy that before it gets too late."

~

He knocked at the door, shifting the bags in his hands as he waited for Alfred to open the door.

Martha waited outside with him even though she could easily phase her way inside.

Jason heard light footsteps before the door glided open.

"Master Jason what a wonderful surprise to see you here please do come in."

Alfred herded Jason inside taking note of the bags he held.

"Did you go shopping before coming here?"

"Uh yea, some of it is for you."

"For me master Jason?"

"I thought it would be rude to come empty handed so I bought tea."

"Very thoughtful of you, lets head to the kitchen to prepare a cup shall we."

Jason quickly looked towards Martha raising a brow

"You go enjoy your tea with Alfred I'm going to look for Thomas, I'll be back by the time you leave"

Jason gave a quick smile in return before quickly following Alfred into the kitchen.

"Hey Alfie we can use the new tea set I got today, let me just wash them real quick."

He turned around, not noticing Alfred's confused stare

"You bought a tea set master Jason?"

Jason turned around after quickly wiping them dry.

"Yeah look, they even have some lilies and forget-me-not's on them, saw them by the window of the shop and thought why not?" He half lied.

"I see, I haven't seen these two flowers paired up together in ...a very long time."

Jason turned towards the kitchen entrance as he heard two pairs of footsteps nearing. Both Bruce and Dick appearing in the doorway.

"Oh good you're both here, I'm about to prepare some tea master Jason brought over for us ,sit down please."

They walked over to the table, Dick quickly hugging him.

"You didn't tell me you were dropping by!"

"Get off, and yea it was impulsive decision."

"Hn, good to see you chum."

"Yeah, you too B."

Alfred walked over with the tea prepared, placing it on the table.

Dick leaned over to see the tray.

"What kind of tea is it?"

"Master Jason brought us cinnamon tea."

Dick looked over at Jason tilting his head, "Since when do you drink cinnamon tea?"

"Since none of your business."

Jason took a small sip before sighing, "Hey Alfred do you have any peach jam?"

Alfred hesitated before looking at him confused, "Peach jam? What for?"

"I like to mix it in with the cinnamon tea."

Alfred's eyes glazed over for a second before heading towards the refrigerator, "...I see, of course let me get some for you."

He quickly came back with a small jar and placed it on the table near Jason.

"Thanks Alf." He scooped up a spoonful and dipped it in his cup.

Bruce and Alfred glanced at each other.

Dick looked up from his own cup, "Does that actually taste good? Can I try some!"

He made a grab at Jason's cup, he quickly pulled it out of reach, "Don't touch mine! If you're really curious make it yourself."

Dick slumped on the table whining, "But what if I don't like it, I'll ruin my tea!"

"That's not my problem"

"Oh come oooon just a little sip!"

"No"

"Pleaseee!"

"Ugh you're worse than a nipping dog, fine!"

Before Dick could celebrate they heard twin startled noises. They turned around and Bruce was covered in tea in what seemed like he spit out his tea, both Alfred and Bruce were staring at Jason faces pale.

Jason glanced around confused, "What? Why are you looking at me like that."

Alfred straightened up clearing his throat, " Apologies master Jason you seem to have startled us a bit."

"With what?"

Bruce finally stopped coughing, "Nothing, you just...reminded us of someone."

~

Just an Idea