#and write a whole script and everything
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i would love to make youtube videos more often but i have no idea what to make like. what do the people want?? there's nothing in particular calling to me
#like im not a complications guy#screen recording clips for hours is my personal hell#i started making rtc scene packs solely because if i went through hell to get those scenes#i might as well save someone from the same fate#and it's like yeah i would love to make video essays#but a good microphone and camera is a big purchase for something i might end up not committing to#also i would love to have a huge fuckass whiteboard and my room is not big enough to facilitate that#my magnum opus needs to be my mako mermaids video essay#i do plan on making full quinton reviews style video essays about the next step#one for each generation probably#but that's going to be a massive project i am nowhere near ready for#even if i don't use facecam i would need to record so many clips for that#and write a whole script and everything#definitely something i want to do someday though#but like what's something i can do now?#idk!#if anyone has any suggestions please lmk#i desperately need a non-writing project to work on
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found another ellison book in a store but its a compilation made after his death without any of his bitchy little prologues to each story. like if i cant read about how annoyed he was about being tardy to everything in his day to day life before reading the ticktok man, or how he only wrote IHNMAIMS in one day based off a friends science fiction painting of what would later be the tedslug, or a borderline bragging anecdote about how he wrote a story in the middle of a dinner party to spite his friend who said 'no new story ideas are possible', then I DONT WANNT ITTT!
#they were in some of the audiobook editions and im very fond of them#and as an author i relate to them because i too like to overexplain everything ive ever written#ugh and one of the forwards is by gaiman. BAAAARF#speakeasies#harlan ellison#i REALLY want the copy of ellison winderland where guys i shit you not has at LEAST 15 forwards before any short stories start#reflecting on his whole career#and it includes published letters where he blew up at#on cbs because they kept editing his script of a twilight zone episode that i dont think ever aired#because he made a secretary cry#and called them illiterate morons like IT IS SOOOOOO FUNNY#and its like a republished version of his first anthology#and the copy i got off thriftbooks is one of the earlier copies so its BEFORE he made long bitchy forwards#now here i am holding a copy of the AFTER he died and now its all these gushy forwards about him post partum#MEANWHILE I REMEMBER IN THE AUDIOBOOKS HE WAS BITCHING ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE WRITING HIS FORWARDS#LIKE HE PROBABLY HATED THESE DHDGSHDB
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post-forced-extension of that assignment i was losing my mind about tuesday/wednesday i experienced a very familiar "ah.... it's as if the deadline no longer exists....." feeling that has now been replaced with "wait i still can't find the resources i need. and i don't know how to organize this. and i don't know what im presenting on (<- super broad topic and i can't fucking find the information i actually need bc our university doesn't?? give us jstor subscriptions or whatever anymore??? so it's all scholarly stuff i can't read or ppl's blogs which im not fucking using for this and half of them just copy entire paragraphs from encyclopedia britannica. who is saving my ass but whatever)" mixed with "I'll figure it out later 🙂↕️" IM PRESENTING IT IN 11 HOURS 💀💀💀
#im having a really hard time focusing too. which always happens bc when AM i focusing anymore but like#still. would love to do anything but stare blankly at my screen humming will wood songs for like an hour. if anyone can make that happen#can someone just fucking tell me what the effects of ireland's political Situation in the 20th century meant for its literature#im begging you just tell me because im finding nothing. i have read so much General History but i can't find lit analysis thats not paywalld#and thats what the presentation's supposed to be on. not a bio of wb yeats which is all im getting somehow#why is this so hard why couldnt i have just presented on the byronic hero or something. fuckkkk#at least i have rascal lying behind me in the chair. we are ass to ass sorta in solidarity (he doesnt care)#he has been oddly cuddly the past couple of days which is nice. have i mentioned that? whatever#but like i havent even edited the ppt since wednesday morning. ive jist been doing more research i have to write a script and do visuals#and it has to be under 15 mins even though im talking about ireland starting before the famine AND the literature from that whole period#if i can fucking FIND ANYTHING ON IT GRRRRR and also can someone just tell me when the celtic tiger happened#idk why but im struggling to find super basic facts and i feel like im losing my MIND. why is this so shitty#it's not supposed to be this hard why is everything. soooooo hard for me all the time orz orz orz
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seeing a Donnie Darko gifset and remembering this huge argument i had with my film professor a couple of years ago where she was constantly saying that she didn't understand what was going but how that didn't take away from being able to analyze a scene from a technical standpoint.
that was the first time i had ever watched the movie and i instantly fell in love because it has so much of what i love in it, so much so that i decided to write my term paper on it (alongside A Cure for Wellness). this meant that i ended up watching the movie a good ten times over the course of two months, and by the end of it i had a pretty good grasp over the story and the themes and its continuity.
and she got so mad at me for "trying to make sense of it".
my paper ended up being me trying to defend myself by stating that, yeah, while an understanding of the narrative isn't necessary to be able to dissect a project, it sure does help add a layer of why certain artistic choices were made, deepening whatever cognitive response they trigger in a viewer.
she begrudgingly gave me a 98/100 because i forgot to add the timestamps to my screenshots, but she also sent me an email saying i shouldn't be a tryhard because i was ruining it for everyone (ie trying to make sense of a story rather than just sitting there and admiring the pretty scenes).
anyway. college was sure a time for me.
#texts.#sorry my job is over-analyzing narratives. like i will die if i don't do it.#she did say she appreciated how i just decided to write my paper in script form rather than use an academic tone.#like no ma'am i've been in academia long enough to know how to write an academic paper#you just told us to 'get creative' so i wrote it in the tone of an 'internet analyst'.#my whole life is me doing as i'm told and then having authority figures get mad at me because i did just that????#same energy as 'no we skipped you for nomination because your skill set is leaps and bounds ahead of the rest and that's not fair'.#like. thanks. i sure love sitting at the intersection of 'you have to be flawless and pour 110% effort into everything you do#in order to be recognized among your white male cishet counterparts' only to still get my hand swatted for 'trying too hard'.#shout-out to my theater professor for being the only person ever to have my back during those hellish six years.
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i was willing to have sympathy for the devs and delude myself into thinking that the higher ups™ messed with their job, but after seeing them agreeing with that post by the kotaku guy errrr.... they absolutely think the game is good quality, not the best they could given the circumstances, but that it has a remarkable and revolutionary story there
#of course development hell shows into some stuff like companios quest being completed detached from main plot#it's obviously because they were written for an earlier version#some voice actors are clearly reading off a spreadsheet not a script#lack of editing etc#but stuff like dravr*n entire existence being tied to ass*n#manf*ed silly ass#r*ok giving quirky one liners while the companions are bearing their hearts ou#n*ve being a detective allegedly#ta*sh i was written by an white american#solas everything...#like this is just straight up bad writing that had nothing to do with time constraints they genuinely thought these were good ideas#and idk there's not much defense here every writer has a bad day i guess and I hope they can continue surviving safely in the world#but like this isn't good work deluding ourselves into thinking it is won't make the industry better#why did i write a whole ass paragraph on the tags omg it's too late now hit send
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𝐎𝐥𝐝 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲-𝐍𝐞𝐰 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲. 𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐈 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐟𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐲 𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝟏 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐚𝐠𝐨.
ah yes, the final stage of law of assumption. manifesting small things, challenges, until you're sick of everything and just want everything you've dreamed of. well- that's me. I manifested my dream life 1 year ago today, which is exactly why I'm making this post! its like my anniversary.
How I did it: I understood that the law of assumption literally is instant and the 3d does not matter. right when you claim it- its yours. So I shut up and decided I'm living my dream life. My aff was "I'm living my dream life, I'm just letting it play out." it was so good for me to perceive it this way because not only am I focused on the end, it helps me not try and try to convince myself in the 3d- rather knowing its done and everything is falling into place. I persisted with that aff, and slowly but surely…things came into place. its like thing and thing again happened, I kept getting crumbs from the 3d- (people I scripted in my dream life, random money, random appearance changes, changes in my family) I kept going until I finally had everything. in short I knew the 3d would change and I narrated how it'll end.
the old story: I grew up in Virginia and was born into a family with 5 kids. We lived in America for 10 years before my father decided he wanted to move to turkey-istanbul. that drained all of our money and we lived in a small apartment with 4 bedrooms. (remember, there's 7 of us) so we lived in turkey for 2 years. my dad kept getting and losing jobs, until he decided we should move to dubai. that made our lives even worse, dubai is SUCH an expensive country. we then lived in a TWO bedroom apartment with all 7 of us. my brother had to sleep in a fucking closet and I shared a room with my 23 year old sister. oh and- my dad quit his job and tried to make us work for his business. obviously it wasn't a stable income so we had ended up moving back to America because he landed a government job. We lived in my grandmas house and my dad ended up getting fired from his job 2 weeks after landing it 💀💀 so we were in America, in our grandmas house with 3 bedrooms ( my siblings had to sleep in the living room). My life fucking sucked. I hated and resented my dad, and my sister felt the same way. She was a severely mentally ill person and it jacked her up even more all the times our father had made us go broke and live in a different country. she was 23 and had enough, she had a whole life ahead of her, didn't get to go to college because we kept moving. So she left- she got herself a job and left our grandmas house at like 2 am without saying a word. Our parents found out and my dad was so furious and hurt, there's a lot of context I wont go over. what she did was a little wrong according to our family, but honestly? I don't blame her. I was sick of it by then- I knew about manifesting way back when we first moved to dubai. So I was sick of it. I wrote a whole 200+ page script, writing every single revised detail of my life. from a bunch of snacks in the fridge to my dad fucking closing his mouth when he eats, ALL OF IT. I was sick and tired of having a dirty and poor father who ruined my life and made me fix it. So I did what I said I did back in the first paragraph, and I manifested everything on the script.
New story (my life now): I live in Dubai again, I have a completely different dad (yes, I just deleted my old story dad basically), My parents are multi-millionaires who own very successful businesses. (the very ones my dad forced me to work for when I was only 13) I live in a super big house with my dream bedroom, I go to a rich private school and I have so many friends. I changed my eye color, bone structure, and height. I live like a spoiled rich daughter from a 2000s romcom. I attended the Super Bowl this year and was able to do so many things. My mom is the wife she had deserved to be, (she was basically the man of the house. My dad was like a toddler, he would ruin things and scream at us so my mom had ended up stepping up because of it) and I have everything I could have asked for and more. After revising my dream life the old story feels like a bad dream. Even when I was typing it, it just felt like I was telling you guys a weird story and not my actual life that I had to experience for 15 years. Anyway, 6/9/2024 was the best day of my life. It was the day I finally got to be a kid, not stress over finances as a kid, and witness everything I had never imagined would've came true.
You can do it. You can manifest everything. and it is much simpler than you think
creds to @itsrlymine @scentedpeachlandcreator and @hrrtshape for helping me see light to achieve this dream. I love you all 💗💗
(edit: I FUCKING CALLED DUBAI A COUNTRY. I meant the uae is an expensive country and the area of UAE was dubai)
++ I created this blog because so many of you were going through even worse situations as me. I couldn't bear knowing it was so easy to get yourself out of struggle and just say nothing. I literally made my blog the same weekend I manifested my dream life, and now there's 600 of you taking my advice 🩷
#void state#law of assumption#loa tumblr#loablr#loa blog#loassblog#loassumption#subliminals#loa success#neville goddard#law of manifestation#law of attraction#manifestation#self concept#manifesting#void success#success#loass success#success story
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AU where SJ is a horror movie director and actor. All the movies he makes aren't overly gore filled and they focus on psychological horror (and have an all female cast with very few exceptions because of course). However, all the movies he acts in have him get brutally murdered (it's in his contract).
SY is a horror movie nerd and got hooked on SJ through his acting. He loved the monsters and the creative deaths. The interviews he watched of SJ, he's enamored (in a TOTALLY PLATONIC AND PARASOCIAL WAY) with the way SJ says he's usually the one writing his own death scenes. That led him to find SJ's movies and he was even more hooked.
But SY is also an actor, but he plays love interests in cheesy romance dramas (he did it originally to beat his sister in a bet but it's not a bit anymore). He's charming and sweet with all his co-actors and even amassed his own irl harem. He wishes he could act in horror movies, but he's too well known as the kind pretty boy from the romance genre. And people will most certainly riot if his characters die, so :(
And as cheesy and sappy SY thinks his roles are, SJ is absolutely enamored as well. His guilty pleasure is watching cheesy romance dramas. He loves them in secret and wishes saintly men like SY's characters existed in real life.
Anyway, during an interview with SY, he's asked what genre he likes, and he tells them that he's actually fond of horror. They ask what type of horror and he immediately starts gushing about SJ. About his acting, his genius, his writing, his directing skills, etc. He tells the interviewer that his dream is to either work with or under SJ, but he laments that he always gets rejected for horror roles.
In the distance you here all the woman SY has enchanted wail in unison as they realize they don't have a chance because he likes men.
SJ obviously sees this and doesn't know what to do with the obvious praise. He panics as SY says he wants to work with/under him, and is struck with inspiration (he had writer's block for a long time). And he writes a script with a kind man that gets everyone to love him with a few words that is actually a siren that secretly consumes his admirers (or something IDK I'm uncreative. it doesn't matter it just has to be a monster role that is obviously made for SY)
He refines the script and starts casting. SY hears SJ is looking for roles openly, which is rare because SJ usually has closed castings. So he hurries over and auditions for the main villain, and he gets the role (to no one's surprise).
When they start the filming process, SY has basically enchanted the whole crew and they all agree that SY was the best option. And then one of the scenes where SY reveals himself as evil, and everyone had something awake in them.
The entire time SY is hoping he's doing well so SJ will like him. And in SJ's corner, he's fighting demons to stay professional. Everyone is fighting their battles while SY keeps looking at SJ after each shoot to see if he's doing a good job. But SJ keeps leaving, so obviously he's not. So he tries even harder (causing so much emotional distress in everyone that wants him desperately)
When everything wraps up, SY asks if SJ would be interested in dinner so he can pick his brain. SJ hesitates thinking SY was going to reveal that he too was two-faced like his character. But no, SY genuinely asks him so many questions and looked stary eyed when he answered. SY didn't try anything and they left with SY walking SJ to his car before going to his.
SJ drives home conflicted because apparently a prince charming does exist and he casted him as a murderer in his show/movie. And SY is happy because he thinks he did so well in getting his favorite actor/director to finally like him.
The movie/show releases and everyone also has a violent awakening and want SY in more villain roles.
SY is happy because he can finally be in horror movies. SJ is actively making scripts to just invite SY to act in them (the most productive he's been in a while). SY is over the moon when he gets an invite to act in another of SJ's scripts and puts his all in his characters. He ends up shining so much that even if he was a side character, he'd be a fan favorite.
And eventually he and SJ get invited to play in a movie. SY is excited to act with SJ (he didn't read the script before accepting the role), and SJ is so conflicted because not only does the movie have a kiss scene between their characters but SY kills him. It's like evil, toxic yaoi or something.
SY finally reads his damn script and is having a whole sexuality crisis, but he shuts up because he doesn't want to lose this opportunity (and he doesn't want to offend SJ, who is openly and maliciously gay). The director (Airplane) is doing this for the love of the game and fan service, so he makes them redo scenes over and over again until he liked a shoot.
SY locks in and tries not to think much of it. Then SJ tells him they have to practice the kiss scene because it has to look authentic (Airplane is a tyrant and demands it to be sloppy and crazy and REAL), and suddenly SY is thinking WAY too much about it. They try, SJ tells him he kisses stiff, and that he figured all his romantic main lead roles would make him a better kisser.
SY doesn't know how to say that he uses stage kisses instead of actually kissing his co-actor because he always felt uncomfortable with it, so he settles on saying something accidentally suave. Probably something like "It's different to kiss someone you admire so much".
SJ takes at least 15 points of psychic damage and tells him that they better practice for him to get used to it (excuse to kiss SY).
Then the day of the scene comes and like... I can't think of anything to end this with. Idk they get caught in the moment and have weird sex on set or something and Airplane calls it genius and takes the movie to production.
This optional if you want to write this au. I just don't have a way to end this post :3
#svsss#jiuyuan#scumcum#shen jiu#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#I'm mostly writing this to feed the bottomless pit (the scumcum server I'm in)#ignore me im insane
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♡ Max "If It Weren't For The Baby" Verstappen | MV1
NEFERASKINGDOM

Summary: Max and George show no signs of stopping anytime soon and poor y/n is stuck between a rock and a hard place. but soon things escalate when Max accidentally opens his big mouth.

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y/n_russell posted:
y/n_russell: Habibi come to Abu Dhabi✨
Comments:
user: SHE’S BACK, EVERYBODY STAY CALM!!! 🔥🔥🔥 user: MOTHER RETURNED TO THE GRID AND IT SHOWS. user: Abu Dhabi isn’t ready for her!! 😍 user: Not to be messy, but is that a bump or just the angle? 👀
user: Delete this before you embarrass yourself further. 🙄 user: You do realize that’s body-shaming, right? Yikes. user: Maybe it’s just the dress, maybe it’s none of our business. Either way—don’t. user: Imagine logging onto the internet just to get ratio’d in the comments. Couldn’t be me.
georgerussell63: Wow. 2 whole photo in front of Lewis’s garage? Feeling betrayed right now.
y/n_russell: omg george, do you want me to write "george is my favorite" on my forehead or something? relax. georgerussell63: I’m just saying, where’s the support? y/n_russell: maybe if your garage didn’t feel like the waiting room at a dentist’s office, I’d consider it. georgerussell63: That’s because we’re professional. y/n_russell: nah, it’s because you have the personality of unseasoned chicken. user: 💀💀💀 SHE CAME FOR HIS LIFE.
user: MAX. LIKED. WHAT DOES THIS MEAN.
user: Not Max creeping in the shadows like that. George, sweetie, you seeing this? user: Netflix doesn’t even need to make a script this season. The show’s writing itself.
landonorris: MOTHER.
y/n_russell: 🔪🔪🔪 user: The knives are out. Lando, RUN.
lewishamilton: Always great to have you around. Thanks for showing up and supporting me this weekend. Much love ❤️
y/n_russell: Wouldn’t miss it for the world, you know I’m rooting for you Lew! Big things ahead 💪🏽


f1teaspill posted:
f1teaspill: Okay, F1 fans, we’ve got a hot one for you! Max Verstappen and George Russell’s sister, Y/n, were spotted on a hotel balcony together, and it’s seriously got people talking. 👀 Y/n was supposed to be at a totally different hotel with George, so why is she with Max—especially with all the drama going down between them? 🤔
Is there something going on between these two? Or is Y/n just making it clear that she’s Team Max in this ongoing feud? You know we’ll be watching this one unfold closely... 🔥
Comments:
user: Yooo, what’s going on here?! Y/n is in Max’s hotel?? 😳
user: Is this a secret relationship or is Y/n just picking sides? I need answers!! 😬
user: So Y/n's team Max now? This is messy. 👀
user: Max and Y/n are lowkey dating and no one’s telling us?! I need the receipts ASAP. 😩🔥
user: Sis really out here with Max?? I can’t believe this. George is gonna flip. 😬
user: Okay, but like... is she betraying George by cozying up with Max right now? Or is she just done with the drama? 👀
user: Nah, this can’t be real. She’s out here looking all comfy with Max while George is literally her brother?? What kind of betrayal is this? 😱
user: Is this the kind of power move we’re witnessing?? Y/n dropping George for Max?? 🤯💥
user: Ok, but lowkey, I ship them so hard. Max and Y/n would make the hottest couple. 🔥🔥
user: No, fr. Max and Y/n are EVERYTHING. They look so good together, I’m lowkey obsessed. 😍👀 user: Can we just take a minute to appreciate how they’re literally radiating chemistry? I don’t care if they’re not dating—they should be. 😩💅
user: The way she’s just chilling with Max tho... George must be somewhere crying right now. 🤣💀


f1teaspill posted:
f1teaspill: “If it weren’t for the baby.” Three words that sent the paddock and the internet into absolute mayham today after Max Verstappen dropped the bomb during an interview. 👶💣
Fans are already in detective mode, dissecting every second of this wild moment. Whose baby? Is Max a secret dad? And what does George Russell have anything to do with it?
Interview Transcript:
Journalist: Max, earlier this week George Russell referred to you as a “bully” in his recent comments. Do you have any thoughts on that?
Max: (chuckles awkwardly) Well, you know, George always has something to say. I’m not going to get into it.
Journalist: But do you think his characterization of you is fair?
Max: (sighs) Look, I’m just here to race. I’m not interested in petty drama.
Journalist: It doesn’t seem like George is letting it go anytime soon. Are you planning to address it with him directly?
Max: (visibly annoyed) I really don’t see the point in—
Journalist: But isn’t it important to clear the air, especially since the tension is so public now?
Max: (snapping) If it weren’t for the baby, I wouldn’t even bother trying to make peace with him!
(A beat of stunned silence. Max’s eyes widen in realization.)
Journalist: The… baby? What baby? Max, can you clarify—
(Max mutters something under his breath and walks off, leaving the journalist baffled.)
Comments:
user: BABY???? HELLO? MAX, EXPLAIN YOURSELF.
user: What baby, Max?! WHOSE BABY?! I haven’t been this confused since Abu Dhabi 2021.
user: Can someone please check if Max even knows what he said? He looked so panicked when he walked off.
user: “If it weren’t for the baby”??? Sir, we’re not in Panem; calm down.
user: Peeta Verstappen has entered the chat. Someone hand him a loaf of bread. user: Peeta Mellark walked so Max Verstappen could run user: I just KNOW someone’s editing Max into a Peeta scene as we speak. Can’t wait.
user: Okay but what baby would involve George? George is childless?
user: Guys, hear me out: What if Max is secretly dating George’s sister? That’s the ONLY way a baby ties them together. user: Nah, there’s no way. George would’ve punched Max into next week already. user: Okay but think about it. Max. George’s sister. A baby. Uncle George. THIS IS LORE. user: I’m just saying, George’s sister has been looking very glow-y lately… 👀 user: Not a theory, just facts: Max is babytrapping George into a truce. 💀 user: Wait... isn’t George’s sister in Abu Dhabi right now?? 👀 user: omg and they were seen together on his hotel balcony jskjsk user: I’M SCREAMING. THIS THEORY IS TOO GOOD. user: Max... the man, the myth, the secret brother-in-law.
user: F1 fandom today: trying to figure out if Max has a secret family or if we’re all just collectively hallucinating.
user: Bro, if this is true, Netflix better dedicate a whole episode to Uncle George. user: “If it weren’t for the baby” is my villain origin story now.
user: GUYS. What if Max meant baby as in, like, his cat or something? We’re spiraling.
user: Okay but why would George care about Max’s cat?! Use your brain. user: Honestly, the only thing that makes sense is Max dating George’s sister. Uncle George confirmed. Case closed.
user: Y’all, the way I will actually SCREAM if Max and George’s sister are together. This is better than any race drama.
user: Max Verstappen?? A baby daddy?? In THIS economy??
user: Everyone’s fighting over the baby, but I’m just here wondering how Christian Horner is gonna spin this in interviews.
user: Plot twist: The baby is Christian Horner’s with Toto 😭
user: STOP. This is the most chaotic F1 season ever, and I love it.

Taglist: @ilovechickenwings @spooky-librarian-ghost @diaryofarandomkid @rd14 @hc-dutch @tremendousstarlighttragedy @grussellsprout @dannyespinosa06 @awritingtree @shelbyteller @diorbrxtz @96mcobo

#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen x y/n#max verstappen x you#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen fanfic#mv1 x reader#mv1 x you#mv1 x y/n#f1 x female reader#f1 x y/n#f1 x reader#formula one x reader#formula one x y/n#formula one x you#f1 smau#f1 social media au#f1 x you#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 x female reader#formula 1 x y/n#formula 1 x oc#formula 1 x you#f1 x oc#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#formula one smau#formula one fanfiction#formula 1 fic#george russell x reader#george russell x you
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Thoughts on two specific areas of the writing in Sonic X Shadow Generations
The best new 3D Sonic game in over a decade (or even two, depending on who you ask) dropped late last year. And I didn't write anything about it! Sometimes life happens. Well, I've finally sat down to finish Shadow Generations, and by now everyone has already been singing its praises for three months. This is the rare instance where the entire Sonic fandom, and even mainstream reviewers, are in agreement on something. The level design is the best it's been in a long, long time and the cool factor is off the charts, embracing Sonic's peak cringe era in an incredibly confident way. It's great. If you're even reading this post, you probably don't need me to tell you that. So I won't!
No, what I'm really interested in here is the writing. Because this is me we're talking about. But I actually don't want to talk about the main narrative of Shadow Generations, which is really solid little story about Black Doom trying to mold Shadow into his perfect soldier. No, I'd like to zero in on two other aspects of the writing here: the revisions made to Sonic Generations, and Gerald Robotnik's unlockable journal.

The updated Sonic Generations script
The new package mostly presents Sonic Generations how you remember it. There are some tweaks, but it's not a major overhaul. Graphically, I don't think the game has been touched much, if at all. I certainly can't notice any difference without a side-by-side comparison, despite playing it on a PS5. The most notable update is that the game's script has been rewritten by Ian Flynn.
Naturally, this caught my attention. Generations always had a nothingburger story, so with Ian rewriting Pontac and Graff's lame dialogue there was nowhere to go but up. (I don't like to pin the blame for those games' stories entirely on them, as a ton of it was dictated to them by Sonic Team, but, well, I don't think they're very good dialogue writers.) But it's less a complete rewrite and more like Ian was brought on as a script doctor for some minor touch ups here and there. Many lines of dialogue are completely identical to how they were originally written in 2011, and many others only have slight wording changes. Ian was clearly not allowed to request additional scenes or extend the ones that already existed. He has to match the original beat for beat so that they can reuse 99% of the cutscene animations. Don't expect it to be a whole new experience compared to the original.
Still, I think the new script is an improvement, albeit a minor one. Various things have been tweaked to maintain characterization consistency. Cream calls Sonic "Mr. Sonic" instead of just "Sonic." Instead of calling Sonic "buddy," Rouge uses the pet name "Blue," like she tends to do in things like the IDW comics. Espio doesn't have to remind you in the dialogue that he's a ninja, and he no longer has a line making it sound like he has some kind of soul reading power. I also like that Modern Sonic now actually has responses to what his friends say when he rescues them, rather than being silent like Classic Sonic. They won't blow you away, but they make Sonic feel a little more engaged with everything.
In general, the altered dialogue just seems tighter to me, and some of the more childish or trite wording of Pontac and Graff's script has been altered. Here, let's actually make a direct comparison, just because this stuff is interesting to me as a writer. Here's a couple lines from after the Egg Dragoon fight late in the game, in the original script:
Modern Eggman: Ooooh... I can't believe this! I was supposed to beat you this time. Modern Sonic: Aw, I'm sorry! I didn't get that memo. I beat you every time! [Turns to Classic Sonic] No, seriously, we beat this guy every time. It's like it's our job or something!
This is a simple exchange. Eggman is mad that he lost. Sonic is unflappably confident because he always beats Eggman, and he explains this to his younger self. But the wording here isn't particularly good. Eggman's simple and direct wording makes him come off like a little kid who's mad because his older brother beat him at Mario Kart, rather than a mad scientist who just had his plans foiled. It's making light of the situation.
And I've never liked Sonic saying "It's like it's our job or something!" That doesn't feel like a thing Sonic would say, it feels like a thing an outside observer would say about Sonic. This is a frequent problem with so-called "MCU dialogue," where quips meant to echo the commentary of a casual, somewhat disinterested audience are inserted into the story itself so that the writers can be like "See? We get it. We're genre-savvy, too!" It also just reminds me of bad Sonic Boom: Rise of Lyric lines like "Rings! It's like they're made for me!"
And then here's Ian's rewrite:
Modern Eggman: I recalibrated everything! This was supposed to be my time! Modern Sonic: Oh, please, keep dreamin', Egg-head. I beat you every time. [Turns to Classic Sonic] No, seriously, we beat him every time. Our score card's flawless.
Eggman's still mad about his defeat, but the line "I recalibrated everything!" makes it more specific. He put all this work into the engineering side of his latest scheme and got tunnel vision, thinking if he got his creations just right there'd be no way he could lose. "This was supposed to be my time!" also turns it into a time travel pun, which is a bonus. He's still pitching a fit over losing, but it feels more like Eggman pitching a fit, rather than sounding childish.
And then instead of saying that beating Eggman is "like his job or something," Sonic says he's got a flawless score card against Eggman. He doesn't take Eggman seriously as a threat—at least, not to his face. He acts like it's all a game. But he conveys this in a way that feels truer to the character, rather than feeling like the words of a real world observer poking fun at the tropes of the Sonic series.
Is this amazing, A+ dialogue that blows me away? No. Again, it's not a completely different scene from the one we already had. Ian had to fit the beats of what was already there. He couldn't go all out and write an all new story confirming his longstanding headcanon that the Time Eater is a remnant of Solaris or whatever. But the wording here makes the existing story land a little better and feel truer to the characters in subtle ways.
But to me, the main change is that the Sonics and Tailses seem to have a more solid understanding of what's going on with the timeline and the Time Eater, compared to how idiotic they sometimes seemed in the original game. Which is good! No more standing outside Green Hill and wondering why it seems so familiar. Thank god. As part of this, yes, there are a few more references to past games in the dialogue, like Sonic briefly being confused about the fact that they're time traveling without the Time Stones, or South Island and Westside Island being acknowledged as the normal locations of Green Hill and Chemical Plant. Yes, ha ha, insert joke about how Ian loves references here. Look, it's Sonic fucking Generations. It's a game built entirely out of nostalgic references. Just own it! And, again, in this instance Sonic and Tails come off as less stupid when they make it clear that they do, in fact, remember their adventures from presumably less than a year ago in-universe.
Eggman, too, seems to have a better understanding of the powers he's toying with. Where in the original vesion his focus was simply on going back in time to undo his previous defeats and he seemed kind of oblivious to how much the Time Eater was actually fucking up the universe, here Eggman says he wants to use the Time Eater to give himself complete control over the entire timeline. Eggman also makes way fewer references to his own failures and shortcomings. Of course he won't admit that Sonic has defeated him time and time again. To him, he's never truly lost—Sonic just keeps delaying the inevitable total victory for the Eggman Empire.
So, yes. The new Sonic Generations script is better. It won't blow anyone away, but it's better than it was. It's been elevated from "kinda lame" to "fine." No, if you really wanna see Ian flex his ability to breathe new life into old Sonic stories, look no further than...

Gerald Robotnik's Journal
Hoo boy.
The story of what happened aboard the ARK has always been... a bit confusing, to say the least. Fans with encyclopedic knowledge of the script for every route of Shadow '05 may disagree, but it's the truth. We've had all the pieces to understand the story for a long time now, but that info was given to us out of order by a pair of unreliable narrators—Gerald, who became a vengeful lunatic shortly before his death, and Shadow, who was subjected to multiple rounds of amnesia and altered memories. Some of the ambiguity left by Sonic Adventure 2 was cleared up in Shadow '05, but that game also retconned in a bunch of new elements to Shadow's backstory (aliens!) that lead to further confusion. Not to mention the fact that that game had multiple routes and only revealed the truth about Shadow if you sat on the ultimate final boss battle for WAY longer than the fight would normally last. Or the fact that Sonic X made its own tweaks in its telling of the story. Or the fact that none of these things ever had the best English translations. I can't blame anyone who hasn't played those games in two decades for not remembering the truth about these characters and getting some details mixed up.
What we needed was something to piece together all of the info we have into one coherent backstory, told in chronological order. And thanks to Shadow Generations, we have that, in the form of an official journal tying together what we knew from Sonic Adventure 2, Shadow '05, and Sonic Battle into the tragic tale of Gerald's rise and fall.
Ian Flynn was the perfect man for the job here as the guy who started his career by tidying up the mess that was the first 159 issues if Archie Sonic. This is what he excels at: taking disparate bits of weird Sonic lore from multiple different sources, boiling them down to their most interesting elements, and connecting it together in a way that will make the audience see the dramatic potential he's always known was there. Rather than feeling like a cynical exercise in franchise building, going back and explaining things that never needed explaining so that people can add more bullet points to the wiki, he puts a new spin on things that retroactively enriches those past stories. The story here means something to the characters involved and gives us a better understanding of them as people, rather than as plot devices to motivate Shadow.
(And, of course, Ian didn't do this journal alone. He wrote the story, but I also have to give a huge shout out to Evan Stanley, who made the final product. All of her handwritten journal entries, sketches, and "photos" included throughout. The physical damage done to the journal over the course of 50 tumultuous years, passing from Gerald to Eggman to a certain special someone at GUN. The way Gerald's handwriting gets less and less legible as his mental state declines. So much love was put into what could have been a mere text dump in a menu, and it really elevates it to the next level. Congrats on officially getting hired by Sega, Evan, you've sure as hell earned it!)
The main idea the journal conveys is that Gerald was under a lot of pressure from a lot of different parties—GUN, the President, his colleagues aboard the ARK, Black Doom, even his own family—and boy did it get to him. The known incidents aboard the ARK mentioned in previous games are put together here to form a story where everything slowly spirals out of control as Gerald keeps compromising his morals to further his research, thinking he'll eventually find some way out of all this because he's a genius. I won't recap that whole story here (if you haven't already played the game and read the journal entries, I would highly recommend at least reading it on the Sonic wiki), but I'd like to highlight my favorite elements of the story, as Ian tells it here.

1) The Eclipse Cannon
Here's something that never quite made sense in Sonic Adventure 2: why does the ARK have a laser that can blow up the Earth built into it? It was supposed to be a peaceful research colony. Sure, Gerald went crazy and swore revenge on the Earth, but, like... when did he have an opportunity to go back up to the ARK and modify it? Did he have someone else do it? How? The ARK was raided by GUN and shut down! And then they arrested him, held him in prison for an unclear period of time, and executed him by firing squad when he was no longer useful! It doesn't add up. Shadow 'the Hedgehog '05 would give its own answer by introducing the Black Arms and saying that the Eclipse Cannon was always supposed to be a secret trump card against the Black Comet. But, like... we know that's kind of a bullshit answer, right? You don't need enough power to blow up a whole planet just to destroy a comet.
Well, the new journal retains what we already knew, but it paints a much more complete picture.
See, long before Gerald ever made a Faustian bargain with Black Doom, he had already made one with an even greater evil: the military. GUN gave Gerald much of the funding for the ARK, Gerald's personal utopian research station in space, but it didn't take long for GUN to start pressuring him to design them weapons. Gerald tried to get GUN off his back by personally contacting the President of the United Federation, and the President gave him an alternative: how about, instead, you just use your genius brain to figure out the secret to immortality for us, so our soldiers can be immortal? Gerald was initially sickened by the notion and found it completely absurd, like chasing a shadow... but given no other option, the sarcastically named Project Shadow soon began in earnest. (Maria would later put a more positive spin on the name after Shadow's awakening, pointing out that a Shadow can show us the direction of the light, like she says in the game itself.)
Of course, this search for the ultimate life form didn't go very well, and without any results on that front GUN kept hounding him for weapons. Gerald would throw them a bone here and there to get them off his back. His research on Chaos resulted in the Artifical Chaos prototypes, which he worried would be used for warfare but could at least theoretically be used for search and rescue missions in floods, in his mind. But that wasn't enough. So he gave them Chaos Drives to power their mechs. And that still wasn't enough. He's got Emerl. He'll give them Emerl. They're not impressed by Emerl. They'll shut the whole ARK down if Gerald doesn't give them something big.
Fine! GUN wants something big? Gerald builds a huge fucking laser cannon into the ARK. However, as a middle finger to GUN, Gerald makes it so powerful that it would destroy the Earth if it was ever fired at any target on its surface. In other words, GUN now has their ultimate weapon of mass destruction, fulfilling his contract, but they can never actually use it. Oh, the delicious irony. (And also Shadow will blow up the Black Comet with it in 50 years yada yada yada.) Is this perhaps extremely shortsighted and naive of Gerald, to believe that such a weapon would never actually be used just because of the risk? Of course. But hey, that's Gerald for you. And I love this as an answer.
(Also, this, uh, kinda echoes something from real life! Remember the bit in Oppenheimer where he says all nuclear war will become unthinkable, and Edward Teller responds "until somebody builds a bigger bomb"? Yeah, Teller went on to conceptualize a superweapon codenamed Project Sundial that would have been able to kill all life on the planet, as the ultimate deterrent for war. This was never made for obvious reasons, but hey, there's a basis for this sort of thinking outside of heightened sci-fi! There's a whole Kurzgesagt video about this if you're interested.)
2) The Biolizard
The Biolizard is, of course, brought up as the initial failed prototype of the ultimate life form, from before Gerald met Black Doom. We don't really learn all that much about it that we didn't already know, but I just love the way it's framed in the story.
As you can see above, we actually get to see a picture of Maria holding up the cute little salamander that would end up mutating into the Biolizard through Gerald's experiments. (Researchers want to figure out how to replicate salamanders' regenerative abilities for humans in real life, too, so this was a natural starting point for the project.) And then, after it grows to a monstrous size and goes out of control, Gerald has to lock it away in an unused sector of the ARK. He needs to keep the poor thing alive for his research into harnessing Chaos Energy, building life support systems directly into it, but he doesn't have the heart to tell Maria what happened. So it just becomes this first dark secret weighing on his conscience. The Biolizard becomes Gerald's Tell-Tale Heart beating beneath the floorboards of the ARK. I love that.
3) Lost Impact was the breaking point for the ARK
Remember the level Lost Impact in Shadow '05? The flashback level on the hero path where Shadow is running around fighting Artificial Chaos enemies on the ARK 50 years ago? Yeah, that wasn't just a random incident. That was important, as we now know due to its placement on the timeline.
See, Emerl's rampage aboard the ARK that was chronicled in Sonic Battle and Dark Beginnings set off a domino effect. Emerl riled up the Artificial Chaos, causing Gerald to lose control of them. They became violent, and so Shadow had to stop them, as depicted in Lost Impact. The thing is, that incident sent an SOS signal to GUN telling them that shit was going down on the ARK. Gerald didsn't fully understand the trouble he was in and assumed that he'd simply be reprimanded by the higher ups, or maybe face legal action. But, well... the next time he heard from GUN, armed troopers were raiding the ARK.
So Lost Impact was the straw that broke the camel's back. I just really like that detail.

4) Maria
And, of course, there's Maria herself. Maria has often been more of a symbol than a character, this perfect embodiment of everything that's good and pure in this world who gets killed to motivate Shadow and Gerald's revenge plots. But I really like the wrinkles this journal adds to her and Gerald's story, and their relationship. This is the most fleshed out they've ever felt.
For one, the journal leans into the idea of Maria's intellectual potential. The rest of the Robotnik family is all geniuses, after all, and she was proving to be a really bright kid. She excelled in her studies on the ARK, and she even helped design Shadow's jet skates and inhibitor rings. When Maria died, the world didn't just lose a symbolic personification of purity. She genuinely could have been a hugely influential scientist who did so much good for the world. That's what Gerald wanted for her. But we'll never know, because GUN killed her.
Speaking of her family, their presence isn't just mentioned for the sake of fleshing out the Robotnik family tree. It's mentioned that as Gerald struggled to find a cure for Maria's illness through his genetic research, he faced mounting pressure from his family. They didn't want Maria to be up on the ARK forever. They wanted Gerald to hurry up and find a damn cure, or otherwise just send her back home to Earth so she could be with her family again. She'd been up on the ARK for so long that Gerald's coworkers started thinking that she had been born up there. Eventually she gains a baby sister on Earth who she's never met. A rift forms between Gerald's two sons, and he's unable to really deal with it because he's so consumed by his work. There's this sense that the family is falling apart, and that everyone is dreading the possibility that Gerald will never find a cure and that Maria will just spend her final years up in space and die far away from her family, because Gerald just couldn't let go. If that happens, it'll break the whole family. But he can't stop now. So he just keeps working. Curing Maria is the only way to win his family back, in his eyes. It can't all be for nothing.
But my favorite detail regarding Maria is this one paragraph:
Maria is growing into a lovely young woman. It breaks my heart that someone as bright and energetic as her is diminished by disease. There are no visible effects, and I've caught my fellow researchers muttering to each other, doubting her illness. It is infuriating. I find all my reason and restraint vanishes when she's slighted.
This is SUCH a great addition to the story! It's always been true that Maria doesn't really seem all that ill, just looking at her in cutscenes. With this one little comment, Ian flips that issue on its head and turns it into a story about invisible disability. She doesn't act like she's in chronic pain, so she must not be, everyone thinks. And this really, really gets to Gerald, as does the pressure from his family. He's dedicating his whole LIFE to saving her, and they think she's faking it?! It's such a small addition, never referenced elsewhere in the journal, but it adds so much flavor to the story, as does the implied family drama. It grounds Gerald and Maria and makes them feel more like real human beings, rather than being pure archetypes. It's just enough info to let my imagination run wild filling in the blanks.
You also get the feeling that Maria being such a walking ray of sunshine was the only real source of joy Gerald had left in his life before Shadow was awakened, and the only thing keeping him from snapping under pressure sooner. All this stuff just keeps piling on, everything's spiraling out of control, but at least Maria is keeping her chin up, right? It makes so much sense that losing her would make him go off the deep end when it's framed like this.
It's just... man, I never thought I'd care so much about Gerald and Maria. But that's the Ian Flynn touch. After years of less than stellar Sonic writing that seemed to be embarrassed of itself, I'm so happy to have new games coming out that fully embrace the history of the series like this, making its world feel so rich and real instead of just serving as an excuse for a string of platforming levels. I don't even like Shadow '05, but I'll be damned if Ian and the rest of Sonic Team didn't make something amazing by "yes, and"-ing Shadow's cringe past here. Sonic has truly reached levels of "we're so back" never thought possible.
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we love spending the entire day trying to prepare for something just for everything in the day to go wrong that you end up not doing the one thing you spent all your energy on today preparing for
#i woke up early and did my hair i bought clothes beforehand bc i didn't have any professional ones i ironed my fucking clothes#i printed resumes i came up with this whole stupid plan to fit all of my stuff into this tiny bag so i could go to class and then change in#the bathroom into the professional clothes later it took me like half an hour just the figure out how to pack the bag so everything fit#i spent half of my first class researching companies and writing scripts so what to say so i could try to make a good impression#i feel like i bent myself fucking backwards to try to make this work and in the end#i burned my leg by hot soup i cried for an hour i forgot to actually eat lunch i went to buy some because i didn't have energy to make any#the fucking train got in my way on the way to pick up my food and i got every traffic light possible so i didn't make it home until 5:30#and at that point i had come up with a new plan to get to the stupid fucking career fair but by the time i got home i realized.#it ends at 6. they start packing up about a half hour before. everyone i saw outside was leaving not going there. i was too fucking late#so now i'm sitting in bed not having accomplished anything eating my shitty lunch/dinner hoping this will all be worth it in the end#like i swear to god if i end up graduating college unemployed i might actually kill myself. i've worked too fucking hard to be a failure#shut up hanna
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⭒ㅤwhose (not) random kid
premise. crash landing from the future is apparently your kid, not that you know that anyway... in the form of a mixture between you, and your... supposed counterpart, clues are bound to pile up as to whose child this is.
parts. rosehearts, kingscholar, ashengrotto, al asim, schoenheit, shroud, draconia
cont. gender neutral reader, use of 'mada' which is just 'mama' and 'dada' cut in half for our resident shrimp (aka yuu), octavinelle's shady business deserved it's own tag, 7.0k words
note. hiii again! it took a whole month for this to come out hehe. my honest opinion, the kid here is the cutest I've had to write. I really love em' 🤎 most of the good parts of this fic is near the end where they start interacting with yuu!
azul
ashengrotto did not do things himself–it sounds bad, by extension. like he was incompetent but most of the student body of the school knew better than to assume so, much less say it out loud. associating with him came with consequences, but much larger rewards to sow if you were actually useful for him to keep close.
why should he exert much effort from the body when his mind had already done the work? he rewarded his employees well after all.
his grip was iron. figuratively, and literally. no slip through for an exit, if he let go then it was because he wanted to. he does things when he wants to and watches it all play with a critical eye. he let his actor take point center, relish the spotlight where in the end, he can bask under the light. what was rewards without hardships?
azul does things for you despite himself.
like now, he’s desperately trying to pluck out every thought of you like a needle stuck in hay from his mind because he was not at the local store for you, but for a business opportunity.
like before, when he would inevitably grace you with pointers for advanced lessons for better preparation. muttering something about him not nurturing employees that lack the essence of his dorm–intelligence, and wit.
like after, he’s not so sure if there is one now. who would take back what he said? him? ashengrotto?
everything is so within a script he plays that he tells himself that he let you storm off because he willed it.
“you wouldn’t know what it’s like to be special,” he shouldn’t have regretted the remarks that flew from his mouth as a defense mechanism that wrapped around himself and inevitably pushed you away. azul was special because he made himself to be (and you were special to him in a way that was irrevocably lost to him).
what did you do? how did you do it?
azul did not want to hold onto someone so sought after, he wouldn’t handle it well if you chose another warmth to run into, he only made investments that he was sure he would win.
he watched when you straightened abruptly from his words. like his voice struck you even when he made sure it was a sound that drew joy from you, you don’t look happy. you breezed past him like the wind, not unkindly but something fleeting that he can’t grasp at.
after all, no one can hold onto the wind.
a pair of eyes follow his frisky movements with amusement–since when did the perceptive, at ease azul struggle to focus picking off the most ripe ruby berries? he’d been staring at the fruit for so long that even floyd, whose attention was frayed by other aisles.
jade had only been interested in the mundane task of shopping when he spotted a tray of fungi on sale, his eyes sparkled. so azul compromised to purchase some free of charge if he was diligent in his work afterward. over time the interest faded, it was simply routine until he exited the aisle after a quick skim and found azul in the same spot.
then floyd got interested at whatever jade was standing by and idly observing.
now, they’re both looking at azul.
“he’s still sulking?” floyd scrunched up his nose as azul threw a perfectly decent ruby berry back into the basket, in his opinion anyway why was there a need to spend so much time finding perfect ones? azul was not as interesting to poke at considering he hadn’t blown up at floyd yet.
marine creatures are much more fun when they puff up. he had told his brother who agreed without any insight.
azul can only take much of floyd, and if he’s still keeping to himself by now it must have been serious.
and! more fun to see if pushed too hard. chuckled floyd in his head.
jade does not stray his eyes from azul. “it appears so.” he agreed with a light hum, he took the pack of eggs from floyd’s hands and set it in the basket before the latter got any ideas of breaking it–more so if it was related to throwing them at azul’s head specifically.
“but i would say it is brooding rather than sulking.” he added unhelpfully to azul’s case to which floyd merely shrugged in response.
“you do know i can still hear you both?” azul drawled from the stands. seemingly finding two more ruby berries adequate enough so he discards them at the basket hanging from his inner elbow. when he has forcefully moved his gaze from the fruits to the two, he is given the full extent of the amusement on their faces.
for floyd, lack thereof.
“indeed.” jade flashed him a smile.
floyd continued for him, shifting on his feet with one hand buried beneath his pocket. “that’s why we’re talking, azul.” cause you can hear us.
in response, azul merely crinkled the two of his brows. he briefly pondered to grace them with a response, but what would simply be adding more oil to the flame and he greatly disliked fire. the twins offered a brief respite from the hurricane of thoughts that was you, he supposed he could at least be grateful for that.
even if they clearly didn’t intend so and relished his disdain.
he pushes up the rim of his glasses. “all done?” azul interjected. there were far better thing to use with time rather than spend it all teasing him–or for thinking of good old you that didn’t fit into any equation he drew.
he still snuck you in.
thankfully none of the two had the ability to read minds, as it happens jade might be eerily good at reading but peering into his thoughts was out of his range. if they did, he would simply never hear the end of it, could have left them all alone just so he could have a hint of privacy.
jade nodded, azul hands him the list. “double check in case floyd,” he glared pointedly at said male. “forgets something like last time.”
the last time azul was negligent in checking twice, floyd hadn’t been able to grab a bottle of witch’s essence. mostly because of the presence of you, where floyd had found trailing after you far more interesting than browsing the aisles for what he was supposed to get.
he was supposed to be irritated, he was until he was simply just a bit grateful floyd was near to ward off a persisting customer of the shop who found your ‘less than interesting magic-less capabilities’ apparently interesting enough to poke fun at.
azul didn’t take you with them anymore. due to floyd’s distraction or the possibility you’d be bothered again he isn’t so sure.
of course, he tied off that loose end with jade.
“i don’t get why we couldn’t have done this at sam’s shop.” grumbled floyd, stopping in front of their paths and is then ushered by jade forwards once more. the voice shakes azul from his recollection, that unfortunately was once again related to you–who shall not be named.
jade momentarily eyed azul who stares ahead as if to shake off his piercing stare. “of course, azul would only stop at the best for the prefect.”
the remark burned him. you who shall not be named burned him, and azul sort of liked it. his cheeks flared with warmth and he cleared his throat, fearful that it would come out as a scrawny, weak, affected croak. “this is for our new exclusive offer.” azul retaliated.
“so the birthday bash offer was not for the prefect whose birthday is today?” jade retorted.
the excited it’s shrimpy’s birthday? from floyd was only entertained by his brother who nodded in confirmation. he looks away from azul who made it a point to drill him a stare on the side of his head.
“that makes sense.” floyd said, stopping to lean by the register where the other two transfer their item of goods from the basket to the counter. “everyone else doesn’t deserve anything but nothing except for shrimpy.”
besides the other students that you had ‘beast tamed’ that extended to the twins, jade took you in steadily when you proved to be a fascinating specimen while floyd took more convincing when you pointedly ignored his attempts at intimidation.
now the tweel won’t even leave you alone. azul is only ever grateful a few times for it.
when thought about once, you embedded deeper in the mind. it must be what floyd as doing because he spoke again. “i haven’t seen shrimpy in a looong time,” he pouted, the cashier had rung up half the items at that point. looking sleep deprived, and their chatter was merely background noise.
“it’s only been 7 days.” azul corrected, unwilling to voice the and 2 hours that lingered in response to floyd’s quip.
“you could just say a week.” teased jade. “have you been keeping tabs?”
floyd off-handedly took jade’s phone from his pocket, having forgotten his back at the dorm. the latter does not argue considering it was better to let floyd run amok when the things he desired was innocent.
“i simply like to be informed well.”
ignoring the other two was easy as trein’s class (which was easy because he slept through mot of it). floyd inputted the password of his other and peered as the screen flared to something other than an ominous screen of a forest fungus. he, for one was glad to be free of the sight.
his face does sour into a blach when he finds the last thing jade was on is an online cart full of plants he didn’t bother to remember, and a few he associated with the list of fungi crewel gave them with the book to study for an upcoming test.
floyd isn’t sure if jade was trying out hands on learning or doing something weird with those… things again, like cooking them up and force feeding it to him.
he shuddered.
“about yuu?”
azul glared, floyd spared a glance to quietly laugh at the expression before returning to the device.
way too bright, he sniffed, swiping down to lower the brightness that was obnoxiously raised to the maximum setting and stopped at the myriad of notifications of missed calls.
“you buddy-buddy with oyster?” queried floyd as he found the number seven next to the red ping of a missed call.
jade tilts his head.
“or yellowfin tuna,” he read. “or flounder, or mackerel..”
floyd listed out the names as he scrolled, only pausing when he found the end to be an answered call from you four days ago. azul turns his head after handing off the newly bagged items as they made their way to the exit.
likely, he recognized those to be the species of his employees.
“we are dorm mates.” jade answered, they weren’t friends, colleagues at most but most prominently dorm mates.
floyd held up his phone. “you got like ten million missed calls from everyone at the dorm at this point,” he snorted. “and message from tuna hours ago about the lounge being in chaos.”
“what?” azul sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “i left flounder in charge, he’s capable.”
“clearly not capable enough, did azul make a lapse in judgement?”
“why you–”
“floyd.”
___
the dorm was in fact.
not in chaos?
the three stood befuddled at the surprising serene peace of the lounge. azul in particular crossed his arms and wondered when his employees got off making lies about the state of his lounge. if anything the atmosphere was better simply because everyone on the shift seemed to be in a good mood right now.
oyster passed along a bottle of coral sea refresher to a table of savanaclaw students with a smile which could be the sign of the impending doom of the world because all they knew how to do was brood, and brood, and brood about their state of finance as if azul isn’t their answer to that particular problem.
“did you teleport us to the wrong place?” floyd scratched his head.
“how dare you imply i could make a mistake.” azul snapped, reigning his temper in before he could fully grant floyd the satisfaction of seeing his patience fraying.
“you exerted your magic suddenly without pausing for mistakes.” jade chided. usually a teleportation spell could have moments to spare before the final incantation to polish beforehand to ensure the body is in one piece after the travel. a spontaneous one consumed larger magic due to lack of perfection.
if the reservoirs weren’t enough the spell would simply hurt the body instead.
azul sighed. “what can i do? the lounge cannot run well, or at least i was told.” his face twists into a cold stare of annoyance, eyes skimming the room, likely looking for flounder.
to his displeasure, he does not see them. only the startling smoothness that the lounge operates in at the moment. it was a sight that should have brought him satisfaction–just another variable in his equation to separate from his worries.
instead the sourness that had lingered for days now churned in his gut. no matter how much water he drank to flush it out, it stayed and that was strange because you did not.
floyd shrugged his shoulders. “eh, looks good enough to me. since it’s operating so well, we shouldn’t disturb them.” which was the less subtle form of i don’t want to work. azul could not read jade’s expression as usual, so he was unsure if he agreed with floyd or not.
he stared longer around. looking for a crack in the pristine management to put floyd as a temporary bandage
azul slumped his shoulders. “fine.” he relented, not without a heated glare at the side of floyd’s head.
then the eel was huffing, striding to the back where the dark halls extended to the inner dormitory of octavinelle. intimidating on purpose of course, to ward off just in case any stray, wandering customer came to close.
and of course, if they still looked past that. any octavinelle hungry enough for a fool was welcome to name it their prey.
he glanced sideways. “find flounder. we have much to discuss.” jade nodded, did not pry. a more favorable trait between the two brothers if you asked azul.
azul was just about to turn to the direction of his office, sort out his plans for the following week. ensure his current plans are not falling through, ponder about the state of you or maybe he can pick himself out of his towering, fragile pride that he’d let you tip over if you came back.
maybe.
you likely would not though, once he’s chased off someone they don’t come back. he does not give them a reason to, nothing in him to stay anyway. you had nothing but had something that briefly makes his heart stammer in a way that warms him even in the frigid cold of octavinelle.
he would need several hours to shrug off afterwards, lamenting over the time his thoughts scattered and he scampered around in his mind trying to pick off fragments. azul did not waste time, didn’t make the same mistake twice but still sought you out like a symbolic voice.
he’s never heard you sing, but he wants to hear it more than your stifling silence.
frazzled, azul grasps at the edge of his hat. tilting it down to hide even the slightest of skin over his distraught expression. forget about them! he protested against his mind, now his mind won’t even listen to him lately. stop thinking about them…
“azul,”
“not now jade.” he hissed, eyes shut.
“azul,” again.
“i told you to look for flounder just a second ago.”
“i suppose you don’t want to talk about the child skimming through your contracts?”
“whatever you do is none of my–”
blue eyes snap open to jade, tracing the line of sight.
a cold chill shriveled his spine. he had not fully registered the entirety of jade’s words, the word your contracts is what he zeroed in on with lazer focus as his legs jerked to move towards the bar. where he certainly did not keep his contracts and where a child was certainly skimming through quite a few diligently.
where did they find that? his eyes twitched, eyes unrelenting on the little thing. the better question was, who let it inside of mostro lounge! do any of them know he’s not allowed to bring any in here?
well, no one does.
still! a child? his contracts?
“excuse me,” he halted in front of their tiny frame, their legs barely even meeting the floor and hovering from the stool. if azul had to guess… they required some semblance of assistance to even reach it, begging the question who and why in the world when they are clutching onto his–! “i do believe you should not take what is not yours.”
azul could not help the frown that tugs at his face. he probably looks unfriendly, and frightening to a child now no matter how soft he forced his voice to be. he reaches out and grasps at the edge of the pristine parchment, tugging, smoothly rolling it to tuck into the inside of his coat without another word.
to make up for the sudden motion, he breaks into a smile. “you are not supposed to be here.” he states flatly, half aware of jade’s footsteps coming to a stop beside him.
the eel leans down slightly.
curiously. the child peers up without a sense of startle, just calm observation.
“mister jade.” they murmured.
said male’s brows quirked. “i would have remembered such a… small specimen.” he says, a subtle jab to their knowledge. a nicer way of prying he typically does not spare for problems, after all, it is a kid.
his eyes drift from the child to azul. not to share a look of confusion but to compare the eerie shade of blue that reflected back at him.
in a surprising act of sincerely, the child blinked and glanced at the hand that used to hold his contracts. “I'm sorry, papa.” they murmured, bowing their head in a show of what seems to be genuine atonement. their hand reaches out and clutches onto the coat of his dorm uniform, azul is feeling more surprised to the fact he hadn't recoiled away.
papa? he's not a papa! he blanched, forcing a wobbling smile.
at their point of eye contact only does he notice the striking similarity of his eyes. it reminded him of himself when he was young, that sort of innocence before it was tainted.
gravely. he shook it off.
though they seemed to have mistaken his silence for anger. their lips purse. “don't be mad.”
jade eyed the interaction with a glint of surprise. “you clearly shouldn't have a child in the future if you've made one so upset already.”
azul spares him a heady glare. “be quiet, jade.”
the child frowned lightly at that. “don't be mean to mister jade, papa.”
the eel in question grinned lightly. “that's right, papa. don't be so mean to the kind mister over here.”
azul is tempted to make his stare more harsh, and throw in the good old threat. it always worked for employees out of line, even if it was scarce to work on jade. so he had always pinned the punishment on floyd, who would then pester jade about being dragged about his mess.
that was how to keep jade in line.
halfway into it, he remembers the innocent child in front of him. holding onto him like he was their father. well, they certainly thought so. which was an extremely silly thought. still, azul bites his tongue before he can spew any semblance to ink on land.
once, jade had received the unfortunate end to his ink and wasn't too pleased.
safe to say he had never tried to dent his pot ever again.
azul clicked his tongue but for appearances sake, he manages another practiced smile at the kid. turning his head to hide a grimace as they tugged on his coat. “ahem… dear child, you are not supposed to be here.” he started. he wanted to back track, he did not want to sound like that crow! “how did you get here?”
“how about we inquire about this charming little one's name first?” jade cut smoothly.
the child perked up.
“i’m solon!”
azul's lips twitched–
“I haven't thought about a name yet.”
“don't tell me its another business thing? it's just to differentiate marine life!”
“hmph, I am not always so driven to success. I have time for other things, like pondering, and indulging your silly excuses for passing time like naming these creatures..”
“what would you name that little cutie there then?”
a shy little octopus in the corner? he paused. “a wise one named solon.” proudly said.
–downwards.
he wants to knock on his head this instant. how dare he betray himself again by drifting his thoughts to you? azul cleared his throat and feigned a cough. “is that so?” he croaked.
“and azul is your father, is that why you're here?”
the former shot him a look so incredulous that it was easy to read. you’re kidding. azul’s face read, both a non-verbal message to himself and jade. do i look like a father to you?
jade was almost tempted to give azul a nod out of spite, to see if his expression twist into deeper offense but then again the two had known each other for a while enough to read more clearly than others. they did not use the term friends to describe one another, more of a lasting companionship than anything else.
as long as he continued to be amusing, jade and floyd would stick by him. be occasional thorns on his side but nonetheless still there.
azul opened his mouth to reply before he could get prodded at further.
solon already answered for him with a nod. “yes, my papa.” to which azul’s eyes bulged through the fogging lens of his glasses. jade had never seen him so discombobulated that he could not help an amused, low chuckle under his breath,
always so interesting. he thought with a simpering smile. he’ll stay by for a while it seems. shouldn’t he call floyd to share the laugh?
it was not azul that pushed up the rim of his sliding glasses up the bridge of his nose, but his seeming younger counterpart. “papa’s establishment was failing so i saved it.” they added.
that solves the why is the lounge operating so good. so that means flounder was out of azul’s red zone. for now anyway!
“excuse you?” azul stammered. “mostro lounge is many things, but it is not a failing establishment!”
solon blinked. “oh, it's a mostro lounge? i thought it was an aquarium.”
“azul was always thinking of having something other than a restaurant for business.” jade mused in reply.
azul could not believe the audacity of this child. coincidentally looking the same as him or not… sharing the same name he shared only with you or not… mostro lounge could only be his only real child, something he raised from ground up with his own blood, sweat and tears yet here was this strange child…
he glanced up, watching the lounge around. azul will not deny that if solon really took care of mostro lounge in his absence, and flounder’s apparent incompetence…
his eyes glimmered. a business opportunity! his mind swooned. “would you like to work for me?” azul grinned lightly, voice tinged with sweetness.
again, jade unhelpfully cut in. “you’ll be arrested for child labor.”
oh, right that was a thing.
azul’s smile faded immediately as he sighed. if only chances came to him like this little one on a silver platter everyday, his business would simply be booming. he would even entertain jade’s idea of variety in his line.
it wouldn’t be too bad.
that way the names you bestowed upon those oblivious fish would be put to use.
ah! internally, he slapped himself.
on the other hand. jade was having the highlight of his day. he would say time of his life but that was only ever reserved for the time azul was scampering around to find a suitable gift for you for… well, no reason that he can remember at all.
after all, he had not been given the pleasure of seeing a pink octopus until then.
in hindsight. he noticed azul was quite down under the works, and even that description was too far off to describe the spiral of a mood that azul seemed to be going through. funny for a while but now quite boring. thankfully, this random child that spoke of odd things made azul interesting once more.
that interest transferred over to them in an instant as he surveyed their form. he had never met this one so he was not so sure how they knew of him, or even spoke so politely with respect for that matter. jade is used to seeing being held in high regard out of fear, not such positive emotion.
a grin breaks his lips apart as he spots the dangling shell initially hidden by their little sweater.
once upon a time he spied on azul giving you the exact same thing…
seems like my theory is correct.
wouldn’t it be hilarious to slap azul with that kind of truth?
“azuuuuul!”
the said male immediately groaned.
solon eyes brightened, letting go of azul’s coat instinctively as the latter quickly straightened his uniform. azul sighed deeply, bracing his remaining brain cells to stick together as he turned. “floyd, how many times do i have to tell you that yelling is unbecoming in the–”
he shuts his mouth at the sight of a blank faced you.
floyd, proudly it seemed, shook his arms in your direction as if you were a surprise. a surprise yes, but certainly not a pleasant one–! “tada!” cackled floyd, sliding an arm around your shoulders and tilting to the side. you wordlessly followed. “i got a tilting shrimpy with me!”
“kidnapped.” you corrected. not too pleased with the sight of azul either which only seemed to fuel floyd’s amusement.
oh. is that what it was? floyd was bored and in dire need of a drama to watch?
at first. you did not notice the little kid. neither did floyd considering he only ever paid attention to his area of ‘people’ which happened to be very few right now. so solon slipped from his radar, only paid attention to when he barrelled to your side.
startled. you hold a hand to their head in case they toppled over from the speed and force they ran over to you with.
floyd shamelessly pointed. “an fry shrimplet sticking to the shrimpy!”
all three of you send him incredulous glances.
“mada!” solon exclaimed with bright eyes, briefly glancing at floyd. “and mister floyd!”
the male in question tilts his head, looks at you, looks at solon, looks at azul then back at solon. “the fry talks!” he blinked.
“of course i talk. you’re always weird, mister floyd.” solon replied, not an ounce of intimidation on their chubby little face at floyd hovering until he leaned down to curiously peer at them. he pokes their chubby cheeks with a grin.
“you’re weird.” floyd retorted like it was obvious, another poke to their cheek has his teeth widening. “and round, hey, hey… you kinda look like az–”
“floyd!” azul snapped with rapidly warming cheeks.
when the male frantically waved floyd over–several times until the latter relented and swaggered forwards, you take the chance to adjust your grip on the child. feeling a sort of responsibility to treat youth with care came naturally as you settled one of your hands on the back of their head, letting them nuzzle all they liked on your stomach.
the other smoothed down the curve of their solider. you felt movement against your front, no doubt a delighted quirk of their lips. it brought a light smile of your own despite your initial wariness to be in the same presence as the intruder of your thoughts.
thoughts that came in either harsh hurricanes, memories less than pleasant swirling around in your head like a storm you can only brace yourself from or a gentle breeze, lighter memories that you couldn’t hold onto as they passed.
nor did you want to remember it again.
“hello there,” you greeted politely at the child who tightened their arms in response. when they looked up their lids were blown open, staring upwards at you with what you presume to be marvel. being the object of such a sentiment has you warming, absentmindedly patting their head. “i’m yuu.”
you also miss the look of offense flashing through azul’s face before he schools it into stubborn neutrality.
“i know!” bubbled the increasingly excited child who promptly bit the inside of their cheek lest they overflow. control what you show. solon thought to themselves but that was so incredibly hard when they could only focus on what they feel!
and what they felt was incredible admiration. even if you were unmistakably younger, more expressive due to the passage of time not caressing your soul long enough for you to be a cultivated version of yourself… this was still the same person that made your house a home alongside their father, who took a more prominent role in managing the smooth flow of the home.
you smiled wider, pinching their cheek. you could melt into a puddle with how the adorable fat stretches as you tugged lightly. would it be possible to shake this little one into oblivion out of cuteness? “i’m solon.” newly introduced solon adds, clearing their throat. “but mada, and papa calls me sol.”
mada? your smile doesn’t falter but you do blink slowly. papa?
you sniffed, glancing up the trio who appeared to be watching you with deep fascination. jade, more so, floyd, less so. azul… was staring pointedly at solon.
“is there a teen father at night raven or did you kidnap some child?” you snorted, tone laced with skepticism.
jade in particular side eyed azul and you followed his sight and could not help your train of thought as you peered back at solon, noting their similar features. huh.
“not at all.” the eel replied smoothly. “azul was just about to recruit a new hire though.”
you blanched. “that’s illegal!” or at least in your world it was… hopefully in this world it is? azul in question immediately straightened up at the feel of your disappointment rolling in waves and he could not help but sputter in defense of his already shattered reputation by you.
“i knew that!” he cried. too aggressive in the manner he shoves his glasses up the bridge of his nose to actually know that. “why wouldn’t i?”
“probably only seeing madol rather than the law.”
floyd snickers from his side–having grown bored of remaining idle, and instead striding towards you. he grasps at solon’s arm, about to pull them up and you frantically correct his manner of holding a child before letting him lift them up.
he holds him up under his arms and tilting his head. “you’re even smaller than shrimpy.”
floyd ignores you boldly smacking his side when he feigns dropping solon, who surprisingly does not even yelp in surprise. only blinking when they were temporarily suspended in air, and caught again. this time closer to your side as you tugged on floyd’s arm with a simmering glare.
“that’s a child, floyd!”
“eh? i just see a sticky fry.”
“you need to handle solon with more care. they’re not like me who you can throw around for a bit, i won’t stand for it.”
“shrimpy survived all the rough stuff and now, look. you’re tougher than all those other kids.”
the heat of your stare heightened until floyd pouted and deposited solon to your side. you shuffled several steps backwards. “that’s not how it works.” you pinched the bridge of your nose, refusing to open your eyes when floyd barked out an sure it is!
you also ignore floyd now attempting to rile you up once more–looking for entertainment, which is apparently you brawling with him.
“how did you even end up here?” you sighed defeatedly. at least you weren’t roped into reconciling with azul, which was what you initially thought when floyd popped out from the octavinelle’s mirror in the chamber. he had spotted you chatting with your heartslabyul companions and when they departed back to the space of their dorms he pounced on you.
no polite requests of letting you go loosened his grip as he hauled you to the lounge.
now you were, not talking to azul but instead holding a smaller version of him it seemed. well, good thing this one was cuter than that idiot.
you were spiralling back to azul and your face must have darkened because solon had paused to eye your microexpressions carefully. the squinting of your eyes, the displeased curl of your lips that only pulled down further the more you unconsciously glanced at azul…
he muttered something under his breath.
again, you sighed. “sorry–what was that?”
strangely enough, floyd stopped speaking.
… so did jade who joined floyd to pester solon with endless questions. do you only stick to shrimps? what do you do for your past time? why are you an algae? would you inform authorities if we took you under our wing?
you didn’t even want to question the last part.
when you look up floyd’s mouth was open in an intermittent yawn–one of his eyes was shut and there was moisture gathered on the corners. he was still staring quite interestedly at solon while jade seemed to just… stand still as a statue.
neither of them blinked.
feeling just like the day you found out magic was apparently real and people here could just levitate a remote back to them across a room, you snapped your gaze around. even the customers remained unmoving. you spotted a group of savanaclaw, one pointedly having hurled a glass towards a half dead server of octavinelle who had their back turned.
you contemplate walking over to save that guy from a possible injury before identifying said student to be one of your previous perpetrators–getting your stuff (especially when it was from professor crewel. back then you went to classes without much simply because you were too shameful to ask once more for a replacement) dumped in the fountain was indeed no fun.
goodluck with that. you mused in your head. call it your petty way of payback.
you glanced around for moments longer, lingering on kalim’s midst at some table.
“what in the world…”
apparently azul could move, like you. you’re not sure why and even dreading your predicament. in what world would time freeze and the only one unaffected is you, oh, yeah. your enemy that you self proclaimed in your head? twisted wonderland apparently…
besides your increasingly disgruntled face that you no longer try to mask in the presence of others considering azul is only ever the one you’d show such blatant dislike to now, he looks positively floored. while the turn of his head is slow as he stared around, his eyes are wide through his rims.
the arms encircled around your waist slid off, bringing your attention to solon who frowns lightly. their previous look of sparkling warmth was still present in their eyes, simply dwindled to highlight their look of seriousness. they crossed their arms.
“you’re my before mada,” solon pointed at you, then to azul. “you’re my before papa so now you have to go back to being lovey so i can go back to my mada and papa.”
both of your jaws drop.
“what?!”
“wait a second–this is going too fast.” you blurted, feeling a bit flustered. who would drop a big bomb like that so suddenly? this kid was saying you and azul have a kid in the far time ahead!
didn’t that mean you chose to stay here? or perhaps you never really did find a way back…
implications aside, it was certainly… an experience to hear it being said so outright. azul seems to think the same due to him gasping out an: “y-you mean…” he gaped, eyes darting to you and solon with reddening ears. “they’re my… we… have a…?”
gosh he was going to faint.
it was at least a pleasure to witness the eloquent azul struggling to conjure a coherent sentence. the more he glanced at you the more prominent his change of color was. it didn’t help that his attire helped it contrast from his complexion.
solon giggled, momentarily dropping their face of seriousness. “you said i’m the product of your love.”
azul squawked. “i said that?!” but, that was just so… embarrassing to say! why would his future self say that?!
you frowned. “is this a joke?” you asked seriously only deadpanning when solon nods.
“please make up,” they said sincerely. sensing both of your skeptism, they reached under the collar of their shirt pulling out a shell necklace that eerily seemed similar to–
your hand instinctively flew over your collarbone. panic giving way to unwanted relief. azul watched the motion.
he thought you threw it away since he did not see it.
“i want to go home.”
you simpered bitterly. you did too.
“mada please forgive my weird papa.” solon beamed, ignoring azul’s look of offense.
“if you do you’ll go home too.”
your throat twisted.
“you said me and papa is your home.”
before solon can spot the look of frozen shock from your face, they whirled around, smacking azul on the leg. the latter winces but didn’t look as reluctant as before. he’s even staring at you in the eye with something unreadable and heavy in his.
azul seemed to be weighing his pride the size of a mountain and the depth of his feelings for you that could probably only be measured by the neverending sea. it wasn’t infinite like some cheesy someone would proclaim, but it was calm at some parts, rough at the other but certainly deep.
something he can’t pinpoint a how but he knows.
he sighed deeply. “i apologize.” he said finally, voice low like he only wanted it to flow between the space of the three of you despite the time frozen. azul felt like that was how he spoke to his business transaction partners so he rephrased himself, there was a lot of them and only one of you. “i’m sorry.”
you squinted.
“my mind was clouded before.” he pursed his lips. “i… don’t want you to be special. that only meant you would be something others would be reaching for, i don’t want that. i’m selfish. you’re so special in a way that i can never take ahold of and keep to myself. i dislike it.”
“you’re terrible at communicating.” you pointed out gruffly. albeit less hostile than before, more inclined to hear him out. was being terrible with emotions an admission requirement here? is the concept of affection illegal?
azul chuckled at that. he did not smile–tried to but it fell. “with you it seems so.”
“yeah.”
“i don’t know how to atone.” he admitted and you only furrowed your brows.
“being mean to me isn’t a sin but it sure was unfair.”
you only heard a quiet agreement from him and pointed accusingly. “you’re going to listen to my demands until i say so, okay?”
iffed but carrying a plank to bridge the distance between two mountains, azul nods. “we should discuss it over a contract. i won’t change any terms.”
which was his sad version of an apology. you’ve come to learn that individuals here deviated from the normal and morally right way of doing things. the most you could do was to recognize that this was this world’s version of grovelling on the knees.
you only focused your attention on the brightening solon–literally bright like he was about to get sent to heaven or something. he was only smiling lighty, no teeth. something you’d see on azul’s face but solon did well in expressing something so little sincerely. his expression was brighter than the light he was encased in.
“you’re going home?” you sniffed, aware of azul quietly shuffling to the side where you were in your peripheral vision as if his small steps weren’t noticeable. you didn’t comment on it.
solon nodded enthusiastically. “mhm. thank you.”
they did not bother with a goodbye, it wasn’t a goodbye. they’d see you soon.
“bye, sol.”
you elbowed azul who had somehow managed to awkwardly stand by your left in the span of a few seconds.
he coughed, side eyeing you. “farewell, sol. keep that necklace safe. it is very precious.”
the child laughed. “don’t worry. papa has all the stuff he gave to mada in a box under your bed.”
azul’s eye twitched. “off you go.” it was more of to finally drag you off somewhere himself and a little bit of not letting any of his future secrets be jeopardized.
when the last proof of solon’s existence fades before your eyes, the world starts again.
“-our wing–?” jade finished, frowning when the spot where solon used to be, in front of you, was replaced by nothing.
he blinked. directing his gaze to azul, noticeably lighter who seemed to be quietly exchanging words with you.
“the heck?” guffawed floyd, rearing his head to squint at the two of you. “when did they make up!”
“go back to work.” azul snapped, grasping at your wrist and dragging you off to the direction of the back.
“are you two getting started on solon already?”
“jade!”
trivia
if you guessed, the time stop was solon’s unique magic: “a chilling stop” very boring name, i know. i kind of just spew the children’s UM names off the top of my head! like you have observed it is simply pausing time within a decimated space for a period of time. in this case, solon only paused time inside the lounge. everything outside remained in motion. the larger the range, the harder it is to keep up.
solon is written to be a ten year old cutie pie male! the necklace he was wearing is what past azul gave to past yuu, and future yuu will eventually give it to solon (yes, azul actually does have a box of trinkets he collected. some things from you, the other reminds him of you. it accumulated over the years and he couldn’t stop)
like the other kids who had specified conditions to return, in solon’s time, future yuu and future azul was in a fight, and he coincidentally (or intentionally?) got warped to a time where past yuu and past azul was also in a fight. their conditions to return home was to reconcile their before parents.
when they came back future parents also made up <3 (idk i am just yapping at this point)
yeah. azul was out here trying to recruit a kid just because they ended up doing pretty well with managing the lounge lol.
i accidentally deviated from my outline lol! originally azul was supposed to start interrogating the employees currently on shift as to why they’re letting a kid run the lounge. it was chaos before and solon made it run smoothly so they kind of just accepted it. better than azul coming back to chaos, right?
floyd’s nickname for solon “fry shrimplet” deviates from the babies of shrimps.
as you can see i didn’t see that particular line and i was writing the ending when i saw it!
the names of the employees are not their actual names lol but rather their species, just like what i did for leona’s part with the side characters.
🔖: @lostsomewhereinthegarden @staplertwst @rinis-reality @rhyzoma @iamprodigious @irzali-imagines @glitterandgoldfinds @luna-looniesblog @wokasiv @readrecieptoff @miyaswmire @dakissomewhere @yourfavouritecitizen @rei-vii @colombia-chan @ceramic-raven @leitor-sonolento @night-shadowblood-writes2 @ms-shroud @bju3c0re @usernamesarehardtomake @wonderlandcrown @los3rtown | @squishychongyun @brights-place @mochiclouds @sol3chu @runu-chan @random-fandoms7 @minkyungseokie
#ㅤ◜◡◝ . . signed !#twisted wonderland x reader#twst x reader#twisted wonderland#twst#twst fluff#twisted wonderland imagines#twisted wonderland headcanons#twisted wonderland scenarios#azul ashengrotto#azul ashengrotto x reader#azul x reader#twst azul#jade leech#floyd leech#gender neutral reader#x reader#octavinelle's shady business tag#azul is bad at apologies#but he is pretty good at favors#do well with demanding a lot!#forgive him or fornay
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soo helloo and i think it's time for me to explain the deal with my characters and this whole "you're not supposed to be here" thing. EDIT: finally updated the info! Also I now have a Unvale profile that I use as a gallery and keep my ocs art in there. You can check it out if you don't want to scroll trough the ynstbh hashtag on my tumblr ha here it is
i made these characters way back in june and by today they have a lot of lore around them in my head. i even have a dream to make a game with them but it's just a dream for now so i'm gonna try to explain the main things about this story. Obviously this is a long post, although I tried to keep this stuff short. and excuse me for my writing and any mistakes, I don't usually write this much text.
It starts with the world. Alternate 15th century, humanity is almost gone and what's left of it shares quite a big city with demons and angels. However, demons and angels are usually being treated like servants - eventually one gets tired of it all, so everyone knows an uprising is just around the corner. Let's just ignore that for now.
The City has a catch of it's own - it's alive. The walls have eyes and ears and the City knows every resident by heart and soul, both figuratively and literally. Usually City acts through the King, it chooses protectors for itself, ones who have strong minds to comprehend it - they will be called the royal knights, each of them have a company of a /more wiser than the rest of them/ demon and angel to help with their tasks. Only the King and ten royal knights know that the City is alive and very talkative but they don't understand fully what it's trying to tell them. Most of them choose to ignore the voices in their head because hey, that's what you do usually in this situation, otherwise they drive you nuts.
City is also extremely emotional and it's appearance depends on it's condition. Usually it's a sunny day out and the city looks welcoming, but you don't want to be there when the City is scared: it might eat you alive by accident. Now that the environment is aside, time for the main three characters.
I need to add that all characters are entwined with each other one way or another - everything is connected here in my head and it's a shame I cannot tell you fully about how it all is.
Imri is a man of a few words, usually stoic and prefers to stay on his own side, not choosing between Sun and Moon or Hells and Heaven. Chosen to be one of the Royal Knights, he's highly trained to fight for himself and protect the City. Though he actually wanted to be a painter. Always collected and confident, he rarely shows emotion and understands little of it, as well as feelings. There is something uncanny, wrong and strange about him. Despite all of this, he still has human fears and boundaries that he has driven himself into, trying to conform to the society of his time.
The Eighth One is Imri's "true" form - it's his very Soul, that takes the shape of a eight-pointed star. It sees a true nature of things and what drives them - if there were any humans left, when the Eighth One appeared, it would probably see them as a lot of blood because blood is what moves us. With that it sees the City as it is - it looks like an abomination. Souls were made by the Gods a long long time ago - although it's hard to tell how many of them are there - the Eighth One is just the one we know about. They appear at late point of the script. The Eighth One is a glass cannon.

Royal knights get to know their angel and demon companions at least a month before they get knighted to avoid any misunderstandings. Imri doesn't mind his friends at all, although one of them causes quite a fuss sometimes /cough cough devil cough/.
Angel /they name themselves Lyra/ is an overly positive, naive and blindly kind entity. A bit childish and very kind but also endlessly naive, can do "good" to that extend it actually becomes "bad".
One of the most beloved by Gods angel, they were made an archangel back in Heaven. Ynstbh lore goes along bible a lot, so it's true that Lyra was the one who threw the Devil out of heavens when he started to cause problems. You can hear a lot of echoing voices when they talk.
Another Imri companion happened to be the Devil himself. Yes, everyone knows who this is, everyone avoids him and he's not supposed to be here at all. No one knows why exactly he's here, but maybe it's because no one dares to ask. And Imri just doesn't care enough.
He's everything you expect a devil to be. Similar to Bible, was an angel once, angered the Gods (multiple times), got thrown out, became whatever he is now. Did a lot of horrific things and plans to do more. Knows a lot more than he tells.

Sun and Moon are the gods of this universe. All powerful but also nonchalant about the world below, they focus more on their own business. Rarely show themselves to humans, so all they usually see is a celestial body.
Despite always looking calm, the Sun is always full of feelings, warmth and love. It's almost sensual in a way. However, they are very distant and prefer to keep everything to themselves. Ages ago, when the Gods were a little "younger", Sun was a bit more open and very curious, especially about humanity. The Sun is blind, however, it still can see a lot, because what is blindness to a god? They choose to be this way.
The Moon is more chaotic, likes to break and corrupt things, a lot more eager to show and tells what they feel. Their mood changes with each moon phase quite drastically. Moon has a lot of influence on a darker things and entities, such as fallen angels and demons.
Angels and demons were made by Sun and Moon and they come in all forms and sizes but those are the main population - lesser demons resemble the Devil in some ways and lesser angels look like clovers. Rivals usually (though they fought like children) but when the revolution happens, they learn to tolerate and work with each other. Humanity doesn't really have a chance.

Rev is a demon that was in charge of the City's guard. Known for his short-tempered demeanor, he was the only one who could control other demons well. When the revolution finally happened, he became the one in the lead - though he's not the one who started it. There is another God.

Time is the, well, time. It's a solitary god, that prefers to stay away from other gods, Sun and Moon. However, everything, including them, depends on Time heavily. Time resembles a bell and has a lot of candles, making you think about churches, but humans tend to forget about Time quite often so there's no churches in their honor left. They don't mind. They are a very minor character in script so they appear only at the start and the end very briefly.
And there is another being, that Imri meets a few times through the story - it's Death. Death is just having fun in this end of the world and there is a lot of work to be done. I haven't drawn them separately yet but Death appears here along with Imri.

The whole story begins at that day when Imri is supposed to be knighted. Everything seemed fine until Imri gets to hear the City for the first time and realizes that he hears and sees a lot more than everyone else. Completely overwhelmed he blacks out - even the toughest of minds often can't take it - and wakes up later only to find out that the King got killed somehow, angels and demons saw this as the starting point for a revolution and the City starts to panic.
Now Imri, guided by his companions and the voice of scared City that's crumbling and slowly drives him insane, shall travel to the center of it to find out what really happened, getting through demons and angels who are busy destroying the rest of humanity. Fun. I'm pretty sure you can get more story and details from my art - I just don't really know how to put it into text right now.
There is a lot more to this whole thing but I cannot tell the entire plot because spoilers, in case if i actually will make something out of this story. Think of it as a game lore. I'm not sure about making sth yet because i operate only on hopes and dreams and i barely have any strength lately but who knows... But now you have at least some context! And yeah, thank you if you actually read all of this, you're a hero.
Now i need to get back to drawing. Thank you all for your support. <3
#art#oc#yourenotsupposedtobehere#ynstbh#i keep repeating to myself that i'm cringe but i'm free - it's so hard to share a story from your head without feeling cringe lol#but i'm also kinda proud that i made it this far and haven't burned out yet#before i thought that i couldn't make anything original with this empty head of mine#i'm gonna keep this as a pinned post for a while
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Hi, if you have time I want to make a request about twisted wonderland for the first year boys (just for funnies and giggles)
The reader and the first year spend a great time together (studying, doing tasks or just chilling) and at the end of the day, before the reader goes back to their dorm, the reader said "it's a really great day! I am looking for we always have time like that" and then the boys realize THAT WAS A DATE!
the realization will hit them as a brick, they had a date and don't act like that, they probably did everything wrong and that was the worse date on the story (they will overthink likely) so did they try to make it up? Or pass away when they notice they have a special someone?
Basically the first year realizing they mess up with what should be their date and now SOMEHOW they still have a partner (as you can see I just want to mess with them)
FIRST YEARS X READER
Where they realize they just had a date with you
How would the first years react if, after having spent an incredible afternoon, they found out that what they just had with you was a date?
You and Ace spent the afternoon chilling, which mostly consisted of you dragging him to actually study (while he whined), him dragging you into a prank war with Grim (which you won), and ending it all with snacks on Heartslabyul under the stars.
Just fun. Just casual. Totally not a date
…right?
“This was a really great day! I hope we always have time like this.” “Yeah, yeah, see ya—”
Ace, 3 seconds after you left:
“...Wait.” “WAIT.” “THAT WAS A—???”
Cue full-on existential crisis.
He’s lying flat on the floor of the hallway outside like he got KO’d.
The line replays in his head over and over: "I hope we always have time like this."
Bro just realized he was on a DATE and didn’t even open the door for you. Or flirt (well, he did tease you a lot—but that doesn’t count if you didn’t know it was a date!!)
He didn’t even dress nice! He wore his basketball club hoodie with cheeto dust on it!!!
Now he's thinking:
“Did I even compliment them??” “Did I make it seem like I knew it was a date?!” “Do I look like a jerk who doesn’t care???” “I told a dumb fart joke. THAT was my big date move???”
Ace is spiraling.
He panics and shows up the next day with the dumbest “apology date” ever—he drags you to the vending and tries to pay for your snack like it’s a fancy dinner. When you ask what’s going on, he’s sweating bullets.
“I’m—I’m just making up for yesterday, y’know. Since I uh… totally knew that was a date. And uh. You deserve a redo. Of the… date. Not that the last one sucked!! I just… you deserve better than THAT.”
He won’t even look at you. He’s blushing. He’s crashing.
Do you tease him? Please do. He deserves it.
Deuce was so proud of himself.
He helped you carry books back from the library, he got your favorite drink from the cafeteria, and you even helped him with homework. You both took a walk through the courtyard in the evening, laughing.
He went to bed feeling like a proper gentleman.
“This was a really great day! I hope we always have time like this.” Deuce: 😊 “Me too!”
Deuce, in his dorm at 2am, staring at the ceiling like a corpse:
“Wait. WAIT. That was a DATE???”
He bolts upright in bed. His face goes red immediately. His heart is racing. He’s pacing the room in his pink pajamas like he’s being interrogated by the Headmage.
“I didn’t open any doors for them… I didn’t even iron my uniform… What would my mum think of me...!”
He writes a WHOLE SCRIPT in his head for how he’ll apologize and ask you out again properly.
The next morning he finds you at lunch and, without even saying hello, slams a little card down in front of you.
“Please allow me to reattempt the previous engagement under official romantic terms. Sincerely, Deuce Spade.”
He’s shaking. You ask if this is a date invitation and he yells “YES!!” so loud people turn around.
You went outside NRC shopping for potion supplies and snacks, mostly. Epel had the chance to show you some hidden spots in the woods nearby, and he even climbed a tree to get you a weird fruit he claimed “tastes better than it looks.”
You ended up sitting on a bench, sharing the weird fruit and people-watching.
He was smug the whole time. He thought he was SO cool.
“This was a really great day! I hope we always have time like this.” “Heh. 'Course ya did. Yer hangin' out with me.”
Epel, two steps into his dorm:
“...Wait. Did they say ‘great day’? And... always?” “....HUH?!”
Epel has stopped working. This poor boy goes from smug to panicked farm boy in 0.5 seconds. He starts talking to himself in full panic accent.
“Did I just make ‘em climb a hill in the mud on our date?!”“No no no no no—did I even brush my hair?? Vil’s gonna KILL me!” “They gave me THE look and I was talkin’ about cow manure like a FOOL!!”
He spends the next hour writing an apology letter in messy penmanship, then throws it out because “no, that’s lame,” then tries to act normal the next day until he sees you again—and completely breaks down.
“HEY—listen, if that was a date, I didn’t mean to ruin it, okay? Let me take you out PROPERLY. I’ll comb my hair! I’ll wear cologne! We’ll eat food that don’t smell like onions!!”
He’s shaking you by the shoulders like the world is ending and you're just laughing, making him go even redder.
It was simple, peaceful.
You helped Jack train in Savanaclaw, he showed you some stances, you gave him water and cheered him on like a personal coach. He even slowed down his reps so you could try a few moves. Afterward, you two cleaned up and walked back together under the sunset. Calm. Comfortable. Quiet.
You gave him a little wave before heading to Ramshackle.
“This was a really great day! I hope we always have time like this.” “...Yeah. Me too. Take care.”
Jack, turning around:
Hm. That was...
Jack mid-walk pausing in place like he got hit by a tranquilizer dart:
“Wait.” “WAS THAT A DATE.”
He STOPS IN HIS TRACKS and just stands there like a statue. The wind is howling, birds chirping, but Jack?
Dead silent. Mentally imploding.
The spiral begins:
“I made them spar with me. That’s not a romantic activity, is it?” “I was sweating the entire time—ugh, did I smell bad?” “I didn’t even offer to walk them all the way back...” “They deserved a better time than that.”
He sulks all the way to his room. Tries to sleep. Ends up going on a 5km run at 3am to "clear his head."
The next day you find a neatly folded towel, a new water bottle, and a protein bar with a sticky note that says:
“Next time, I’ll plan something more fun for you. Sorry I didn’t realize it was a special day.” – Jack
He’s too embarrassed to say it out loud but yes, he is 1000% trying to plan a redemption date.
You’ll catch him looking up “date ideas” in Magicam.
You offered to help Sebek with his study session in the library.
He was unusually flustered, but he eventually settled down and you two got into a good rhythm—him ranting about Malleus and quietly organizing your notes so they were less of a disaster.
Later, he walked you all the way back to Ramshackle like the knight he is.
You turned before going inside.
“This was a really great day! I hope we always have time like this.”
Sebek (arms crossed, puffed-up):
“OF COURSE IT WAS, HUMAN. ANY TIME SPENT IN MY COMPANY IS—uh—GREAT.”
Sebek, hours later, in his room, gripping his pillow like it's the last life vest on a sinking ship:
“WAIT. WAIT A MOMENT.”
Complete meltdown. He throws himself to the floor like a Shakespearean tragic hero.
“I SPOKE OF LORD MALLEUS FOR TWENTY-TWO MINUTES STRAIGHT…!” “I FORGOT TO COMPLIMENT THEIR APPEARANCE!” “I MADE THEM CARRY THEIR OWN BOOKS!”
He scribbles in his notebook: “How to properly court a human”
The next day, he corners you in a hallway and formally bows, nearly headbutting the wall in the process.
“I—I was tragically unaware that our previous engagement was of romantic nature. Allow me to formally request another, in which I shall behave appropriately.”
He looks like he's facing a military tribunal.
You say yes.
He short-circuits and power walks away at supersonic speed.
#twst x reader#twisted x reader#twisted wonderland x reader#sebek x reader#sebek zigvolt x reader#sebek x yuu#sebek zigvolt#ace trappola x reader#ace x reader#aceyuu#ace trappola#deuce x reader#deuce spade x reader#deuceyuu#deuce spade#epel felmier x reader#epel x reader#epel x yuu#epel felmier#jack howl x reader#jack x yuu#jack x reader#jack howl
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is it new years yet? — nanami kento.
"Apparently, we're #RelationshipGoals now." "Some of them really think I write poetry about you during my lunch breaks, too. Not inaccurate, of course. But the thoughts I have of you are different." “My darling, behave.” “No <3” ".......In any case, my darling…..this one says I’m lucky to have you. Can’t argue with that."
GENRE: alternate universe - no curses au!;
WARNING/S: afab! reader, secret coworker romance, co-workers to lovers, romance, fluff, nsfw, rated 18 and above, explicit content, kissing, making out, rough sex, fingering, creampie, p to v sex, stairwell sex, orgasm, humor, profanity, pet names (my darling, babe, etc), possessiveness, jealousy, characters speaking in sexual innuendo, mention of sexual euphemisms, depiction of explicit sexual content, actor! nanami kento, actor! reader;
WORD COUNT: 6k words.
NOTE: hello everyone, this is the first fic of 2025!!! this was specifically written because of a conversation between me and @midnight-138 on the afternoon of december 31st 2024. i started progress while on a bus on the way to my grandma's house and for a bit on the 1st. i still wanted to write more for it, but i had to stop because i caught a cold. i still have a cold. and i need a massage cause i feel my body hurt real bad, cause its working hard to save my life from this cold TT TT
but that being said, i shouldn't complain too much. good things have been happening to me despite my problems. i hope that good things continue to come!!! anyway, enough yapping, i hope you enjoy this little fic. happy 2025!!! may good things, good health and happiness come your way always this year!!!
masterlist
if you want to, tip! <3
IT WAS ALWAYS LIKE THIS WHEN YOU AND KENTO GET TOGETHER. But it was to be expected, since you graced the screens since you were a child. Nanami Kento was like that too. Of course, it wasn’t something of a brag at all. It was just your normal.
You were lucky, you were favored like that. Kento was favored just like that. Both of you were so beloved. And especially so, in a way that they end up hoping that you both were together.
Ever since you worked with him on Jujutsu Kaisen all those years ago, it was just too strong — the chemistry between the two of you. It pulls people in for more. They wanted a story, they wanted something that could ease their days from the mundane boredom that it was to the fun, exhilarating excitement that comes with the tea in both of your private lives.
You didn’t mind, your company didn’t mind either. Neither did Kento or his side of the aisle. It helped that you were both good friends. You had met even before landing your roles on Jujutsu Kaisen, after all. So, the ‘will they, won’t they’ between the two of you really did help your careers.
But of course, just like in Gege–sensei’s scripts, some parts are sentences with too many blank pages. And the wholeness of your relationship with Nanami Kento truly only belonged to you and him. And you were not willing to expose it to the world. Not just yet.
Yet — this does not stop them from trying to do something about that.
The studio buzzed with activity as you adjusted the earpiece in your ear, stealing a quick glance at the veteran actor, singer, producer, writer and entertainment personality that is Nanami Kento.
He stood near the stage, his posture relaxed yet impossibly refined. Dressed in a tailored charcoal suit, his tie a subtle but elegant shade of deep blue,everything about him just exuded a quiet confidence that made it hard for anyone to look away.
You, however, knew better than to let your gaze linger too long. You knew too well that those are reserved for just him and you to interpret and to see. No one else should. You were as possessive about your private moments as he was. But you would never say that outloud and neither will he.
“Can you believe these two again?” a stagehand whispered slowly, behind you. It was still, of course, loud enough for you to hear. “It’s like they were made for this. If they don’t end up together after tonight, I’ll lose faith in love. Really!”
You bit back a laugh, focusing on your notes. No one knew the truth, after all. That you and Kento were already together had been for a while now. Not even your publicists or managers — hell, not even your entertainment companies, knew that this was for genuine actuality, a real thing now. But you and him liked it that way.
You had let your fans go wild with their theories over the years of course. Every post, every comment, every little interaction, every collaboration, every press tour — almost everything seemed to spark a new wave of speculation and fan shipping.
For years now, the internet was rife with hashtags like #OurSecretLovers and #MrAndMrsNanami with fans pouring over every detail like it's an investigatory report they were doing, a documentary study. You had to admit, it was amusing at times, watching people try to connect dots they couldn’t see.
Nanami Kento had a reputation for being rather serious, because he gets roles in that league often. But he was a silly little man, well your silly little man. And he often had the knack for finding the most random, yet oddly endearing, posts about the two of you on Twitter. During your five-minute breaks between shoots, when you were in separate rooms or on different sets, his messages would pop up on your phone, accompanied by a link and a deadpan caption.
"Apparently, we're #RelationshipGoals now."
"Some of them really think I write poetry about you during my lunch breaks, too. Not inaccurate, of course. But the thoughts I have of you are different."
“My darling, behave.”
“No <3”
".......In any case, my darling…..this one says I’m lucky to have you. Can’t argue with that."
You’d giggle to yourself, your shoulders shaking as you tried not to draw attention. It didn’t matter how serious the production you were working on either. He had a way of making you laugh even from miles away. And that relaxes you a lot.
When it was your turn, you’d send him TikToks. Fancam edits of the two of you together had exploded in popularity as of late, especially since you both played a married couple who were spies deceiving each other recently. People thought he looked so good, especially when he had his shirt off. You loved teasing him about it. After all, he was really pretty hot in those scenes. And if you were being honest, they did in fact rile you up.
"Look at us, babe." you texted once, attaching a video with dramatic lighting, a love song playing over clips of you two stolen from interviews and behind-the-scenes footage. "We’re icons."
His reply came almost immediately: "Icons, sure. But I’m just a guy who got lucky enough to be yours, you know?"
Those words made your heart swell every time. He’d always been effortlessly humble, never letting fame or admiration inflate his ego, even as his star rose. After all, you were the senpai here—the darling of the Japanese screen since childhood.
You’d grown up in the industry, your name synonymous with household stardom. He, on the other hand, had been a late bloomer, starting as a teenager and building his career with quiet determination.
He never let the difference in your status get in the way, though. If anything, it only made him more in awe of you. He’d often remind you how much he admired your grace, how you’d navigated the pressures of fame with a poise that still left him speechless.
“You’ve been dazzling audiences since you were a kid.” he’d say, his voice warm with pride. “I’m just lucky to share the screen with you now and your life.”
And you’d roll your eyes playfully, nudging him with a smile. “Don’t sell yourself short, Kento. You’re a fan favorite for a reason.”
“Maybe.” he replied with a soft smirk. “But you’re my favorite. And that’s what matters.”
No matter how busy your schedules got, those small exchanges, be it a funny link or a sentimental text, every bit of this kept you connected. It reminded you both that beneath the glitz and glamour, what truly mattered was the quiet, enduring love you shared.
You were out of your bubble soon enough when Kento suddenly caught your eye from across the room, offering a small, reassuring smile and then a small gentle nod. You felt your cheeks turn red but lowered your head immediately before anyone was to notice. He was too good at making you feel like this. And certainly so, he was hiding his smirk under his cue cards.
“Alright, places, everyone!” the director called.
You finally stood up from your chair, taking a deep breath and calmed down. You gave yourself one more look in the mirror, trying to make sure that your cheeks were natural now. When you felt like it was, you smiled at your manager who handed you the mic and swiftly thanked them. You went to your position. Kento soon approached, his footsteps purposeful but unhurried.
“Ready?” he asked, his voice low and calm.
“Ready as I’ll ever be, I suppose.” you replied, flashing him a smile.
You were grateful for the reassurance. Even if you were already such a big name, you still did get nervous. And even more so, with such a big show like this — the New Year Countdown, of course you could feel yourself slipping.
The two of you took your positions on stage as the lights dimmed and the opening music swelled. His fingers brushed against yours briefly as he fixed himself up, your pinkies touching. Even briefly, you could feel the warmth. He did that on purpose. You could see it in his caramel eyes.
You let a brief smile echo on your lips. You gathered yourself as the lift came up slowly. When you both were in the sight of the gathered audiences and the cameras started to broadcast it all live, you both slipped effortlessly into your roles. After all, you both were professionals.
“Good evening, everyone, and welcome to this year’s New Year’s Eve Countdown!” you began, your voice bright and enthusiastic.
“Thank you for joining us as we bid farewell to the old year and welcome the new.” Kento added, his tone smooth and polished.
Your banter flowed naturally, as always. That well beloved chemistry between you is still ever so undeniable. It was easy to fall into a rhythm with him; he was your partner in every sense of the word. And that made your job tonight a little bit easier.
But of course, the real challenge was hiding the little moments that threatened to give you away that bit you kept so dear to you. You just can't help it when it comes to him. He has such a powerful pull on you and he knows it.
There were those little lingering glances, watching and feeling the way his fingers brushed yours when you handed him a card, the subtle softness in his smile when he looked at you. After all, this is the longest you could be together in your very busy schedules this year.
Still, you kept yourself in that cage. And so did he, despite his lack of patience when it comes to you and everything about you. As the night progressed, the energy in the studio grew electric.
Various music performances lit up the stage, and interviews with special guests kept the crowd engaged. Throughout it all, you and Kento remained the perfect duo—professional, poised, and completely in sync.
After nearly a few hours of composure, it came almost all too suddenly. In just a few moments, the final countdown approached, and the excitement was palpable. The two of you stood at the center of the stage, along with the other participants for this year’s event. In front of you, the crowd behind you cheering wildly, waiting excitedly for the new year.
“Here we go!” you said, your voice barely audible over the noise.
Kento leaned in slightly, his voice low enough for only you to hear. “You’re doing great, darling..”
Your heart fluttered, but you kept your composure. “Thanks. You’re not so bad yourself, babe.”
The countdown soon began.
You took a breath, looking at the screen.
You held your cue cards tightly to you.
“Ten! Nine! Eight!”
The lights soon dimmed, and the giant screen behind you displayed the numbers as they ticked down. The crowd’s voices grew louder with each second. The emotions coming through you were indescribable. Another year had gone by. But he was still by your side, like this. And all you could pray for as the time passed into a new age — that you would always be together.
“Three! Two! One! Happy New Year!”
Confetti soon rained down, and the studio erupted in cheers. You turned toward Kento, and for a fleeting moment, the world around you disappeared. The look in his caramel eyes was unmistakable—warm, tender, and filled with a quiet pride that made your chest tighten.
But just as quickly, the moment passed, and you both turned back to the crowd, waving and smiling as the cameras captured every angle. People of course started to pay less attention to you both and the stage and more onto the fireworks now blurring the sky with its bright hues. You and Kento made a steady exit off the stage.
“Another successful project, isn’t it?” you said, breaking the silence as you leaned against the wall.
Kento smirked faintly, unbuttoning the top of his shirt to loosen his tie. “They’ll be talking about this for weeks, you know?”
“And shipping us even harder, hm.” you added with a laugh.
“They’ll never know, though.” he said, his voice soft but steady.
You stepped closer, your hand finding his. His fingers intertwined with yours, the simple gesture grounding you in a way nothing else could. “They don’t need to, babe.” you whispered, meeting his gaze. “This is ours.”
Kento’s lips curved into the faintest smile as he brought your hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to your knuckles. “Happy New Year, my darling.”
“Happy New Year.” you replied, your voice barely above a whisper.
You had thought it would end there, sweet and innocent. You had thought you both were safe for one more year. But when you two are together after a long time…..it was a whole new animal. And nothing can stop such a wave in high tide from occupying something whole.
The next tithing you know is that the internet exploded the moment the photos dropped. Headlines blared across every platform, hashtags like #FINALLYOMG and #NewYearNewScandal trending within minutes after they were taken.
The pictures were pretty damning. They were blurry but unmistakably you, disheveled and wrapped in Nanami’s coat, your hair a mess. And him? A rare sight indeed.
It was none other than Nanami Kento, usually the epitome of composure, looking uncharacteristically undone. His tie was loose, his shirt wrinkled, and the telltale bruises blooming on his neck left little to the imagination.
You groaned, tossing your phone onto the coffee table as you buried your face in your hands. Beside you, Kento sat unbothered, calmly sipping his tea like the world wasn’t on fire—or at least your career’s PR team.
“I told you we should’ve been more careful, babe.” you muttered, your voice muffled by your palms.
He raised an eyebrow, the corner of his lips quivering into a teasing smile. “You were the one who couldn’t wait with it, y'know?” he replied smoothly, setting his cup down with an elegant clink.
His tone was infuriatingly calm, but the glint in his eyes betrayed his amusement. “Who was it again, begging me to fill you up? By round two, you were going—‘Kento, I need you. Right here. Right now.’ and I was happy to heed the request like always.”
Your scarlet blush was immediate, your head snapping up to glare at him. “Kento!” you hissed, glancing around the living room as if someone could overhear, even though it was just the two of you. “Not helping!”
He leaned back in his chair, crossing his legs with the air of a man thoroughly enjoying himself. “I’m just stating the facts about, I'm the same.” he said with a shrug, his smirk widening as you shot him another flustered look. "That's not a bad thing."
Your phone buzzed again on the table, your manager’s name flashing on the screen. You sighed, picking it up only to immediately huff and toss it back down. “This is really…” you trailed off, searching for the right word but settling on a frustrated groan instead.
“Chaotic? Consequential? Hilarious?” Kento offered, his voice laced with mock innocence.
You shot him a glare that was far more affectionate than threatening. “Horrible. That’s the word. This is horrible.”
He chuckled, reaching over to rest a comforting hand on your knee. “Darling, it’s not the end of the world. Scandal or not, we’ll deal with it.”
“Easy for you to say.” you grumbled, crossing your arms. “Your team probably thinks this is great publicity for your brooding, mysterious heartthrob image. Meanwhile, I’m the one getting texts about how unprofessional it looks for ‘Japan’s sweetheart’ to be caught sneaking around with hickeys and wearing her boyfriend’s coat.”
“Unprofessional?” he repeated, his tone incredulous. “It’s not like we committed a crime. We’re adults in a committed relationship. And in any case my darling....….” he added, his voice dropping to a playful murmur. “You look adorable in my coat.”
Despite yourself, you couldn’t help but crack a small smile. “You’re impossible.”
“And yet, you love me. Very much." he quipped, leaning over to steal a quick kiss from your lips.
You rolled your eyes but didn’t protest, instead letting your head fall onto his shoulder with a sigh. “Next time, though….really.....” you muttered. “We’re finding a stairwell without photographer cameras.”
He chuckled, pressing a kiss to your temple. “Noted.”
As you leaned against your lover, the memory hit you both like a freight train, vivid and unrelenting. It had started innocently enough—or as innocently as it could between the two of you. The countdown show had gone off without a hitch, and the studio was still buzzing with post-show chaos.
You both talked for a bit, had a cute moment and then went back to your professional mode when everyone started to surround you both again. It was like a switch, and it was easy. No one suspected a thing.
You went ahead into the dressing room, you talked with everyone. You’d been polite and professional, thanking the crew and chatting with some of the guests. But the moment Nanami Kento had caught your eye as you left the green room, something in his caramel gaze had made your pulse quicken.
You hadn’t seen him in weeks. Between his packed schedule and yours, the countdown project had been the only excuse to be in the same room together. The public facade you maintained only added to the frustration. Every fleeting touch, every shared look—it all built up, an unbearable tension neither of you could ignore.
So, when he’d quietly grabbed your hand and guided you down a quiet, rarely-used stairwell in the building when no one was looking, you hadn’t protested. You were excited, happy even. This was the chance to feel him again this close to you.
And you were glad for that opportunity. You could feel his touch be so genuine and warm despite the heavy chill in the air, and the firm grip of his fingers around yours sent a shiver of anticipation down your spine.
“Darling, I missed you, really.” he murmured as soon as you were alone.
His voice low and rough, filled with a longing that made your knees weak. His hands cupped your face with a reverence that always left you breathless, his thumb brushing softly against your cheek as he leaned in. The kiss was searing, his lips melding with yours as though it had been an eternity since your last stolen moment together.
The cold winter air bit at your exposed skin, but his touch set you alight. His coat had slipped from his shoulders in a quiet, unspoken gesture, draped over yours as his lips moved to your neck. The kisses were hot, open-mouthed, and deliberate, his tongue tracing the sensitive skin before his teeth grazed your pulse.
“Kento, babe….” you gasped, your voice trembling from a mix of the frigid air and the heat of his attention. Your fingers clutched the lapels of his suit, trying to ground yourself against the onslaught of sensations.
“Shh, just enjoy it......” he whispered, his breath warm against your skin.
His hands slid down your sides, firm but gentle as they gripped your thighs. Without hesitation, he lifted you effortlessly, pressing your back against the wall. The rough texture scraped against your coat, but you barely noticed, too focused on the way his body pressed into yours.
His strength always caught you off guard, even after all this time together. Your eager legs wrapped instinctively around his waist, your heels digging into his lower back. His hands gripped your thighs, spreading you open as he stepped between them, his body fitting against yours like a missing piece.
“Babe!” you breathed again, the sound barely audible over the pounding of your heart.
He kissed you like a man starved, his lips leaving your neck to reclaim your mouth. The intensity of it stole the air from your lungs, leaving you dizzy and clinging to him. He was hungry, perhaps even more than you were. But you had expected that. He has a habit of yearning to touch you a lot.
“I hate not being able to touch you, with all the schedules we fucking had.” he muttered against your skin, the words tinged with frustration and longing. “Hated every fucking minute of it……”
You tangled your fingers in his hair, the silky strands slipping through your fingers as you tugged him closer. “Then don’t stop, babe.” you whispered, the plea soft but desperate. “Cause….I need you badly too. I need you so bad in me—”
He growled softly, the sound rumbling against your throat as his touch shifted. One hand remained steady on your thigh, holding you firmly in place, while the other slid beneath the hem of your dress. His fingers were deliberate, pushing aside the delicate lace of your panties with practiced ease.
When his fingers slipped through your slick folds, a gasp escaped your lips, your head falling back against the wall. He groaned softly, the sound low and satisfied as he gathered your arousal, his touch teasing and unhurried.
“You’re already so ready for me, aren’t you, my darling?” he murmured, his lips brushing against the shell of your ear as his fingers moved with precision, finding the spot that made you arch into him.
The cold air around you was a stark contrast to the heat building between you, the quiet of the stairwell broken only by your uneven breaths and his whispered praises. It was reckless, indulgent, and utterly intoxicating—just like him.
“Kento, babe….oh!” you whimpered, your voice trembling as his fingers continued their unrelenting rhythm. Your hands clutched at his shoulders, nails digging into the fabric of his shirt as waves of pleasure began to build within you.
“Shh, darling.” he murmured, his lips brushing against your ear before trailing back to your neck. His voice was low and soothing, laced with a quiet intensity that only made your pulse race faster. “You’ll have to keep quiet for me. Can you do that?”
You nodded frantically, biting your lip to stifle the moan threatening to escape as he added a second finger. The stretch was delicious, his movements slow and deliberate, coaxing you higher with every stroke. His thumb brushed over your sensitive bud, and your thighs instinctively clenched around his waist.
He chuckled softly, his breath warm against your skin. “That’s my good little lover, hm? My only beloved darling.” he murmured, his praise sending a fresh wave of heat coursing through you. “So perfect for me.”
Your fingers slid up into his messy blond hair, tugging gently as your body arched against him. The rough texture of the wall behind you was a sharp contrast to the soft warmth of his touch, grounding you as he pushed you closer to the edge.
“Kento, please, b–babe….oh!” you breathed, the words barely audible as your head tilted back, exposing more of your neck to his eager lips. “M–more…..more!”
He hummed in response, the sound vibrating against your skin. “So impatient, aren’t you? Greedy too.” he teased, though his fingers quickened their pace, curling just right to hit the spot that made your breath hitch. “I missed seeing you like this, so needy for me.”
The heat pooling in your core intensified, your body trembling as the pleasure built to an unbearable peak. “I’m—” you began, but the words dissolved into a strangled gasp as he pressed his thumb harder against your sensitive nub.
“That’s it, pretty for me, so fucking pretty." He says, coaxing you like a pied piper. His voice was low and intoxicating. Everything about it just burns you as much as his touch did. "I’ve got you. Always.”
With one final stroke, the beautiful echo, that blossoming coil inside you just snapped, pleasure crashing over you like a tidal wave. Your body tensed, your thighs tightening around his waist as you buried your face in his shoulder to muffle the cry that escaped your lips.
He held you through it, his fingers slowing their movements as your body shook with aftershocks. His other hand slid up to cradle the back of your head, his lips pressing soothing kisses against your temple.
When you finally relaxed, your breaths coming in shallow gasps, he pulled back just enough to look at you. His eyes were soft, his gaze filled with a mixture of adoration and satisfaction that made your chest tighten.
“Better?” he asked, his tone light but tinged with affection.
You nodded, still too dazed to form words. He chuckled, adjusting his hold on you as he gently set you back on your feet. Your legs wobbled like jello against him, and he immediately steadied you, his hands firm but gentle on your waist.
“Careful, darling.” he murmured, his brow furrowing in concern. “Are you alright?”
“I’m fine, babe.” you managed, your voice breathless but steady. “More than fine.”
His lips quivered into a soft smile, and he leaned down to press a lingering kiss to your forehead. “Good.”
As the reality of your surroundings sank back in, you couldn’t help but glance around, the abandoned stairwell suddenly feeling far less private. “We should… probably get back, babe.” you said, your cheeks flushing with embarrassment. “It’s getting pretty late.”
He followed your gaze, his expression calm and unbothered. “Let them wonder where we went.” he said simply, shrugging off the concern as he adjusted his coat around your shoulders. "It's none of their business."
You opened your mouth to protest, but the mischievous glint in his eyes stopped you cold. He leaned closer, his breath warm against your ear as he whispered, “After all… I’m not done with you yet.”
Your breath hitched, and before you could respond, he was guiding you gently back against the wall. His lips found yours again, this time slower, deeper, igniting the fire he’d only begun to stoke. His hands trailed down your sides, their warmth chasing away the chill of the stairwell as he pressed his body firmly against yours.
“Kento, babe.” you murmured, a weak attempt to regain your composure, but he silenced you with a kiss that left no room for argument.
“I missed you, a damn whole lot.” he said, his voice low and filled with longing as his hands slid to your thighs, lifting you effortlessly once more. "Like I always do."
Your legs wrapped around his waist instinctively, your heart pounding as the desire you’d both tried to suppress flared back to life. He pressed against you, the hardness of his arousal undeniable even through the fabric of his pants. The teasing grind of his hips against yours drew a gasp from your lips, and he smirked, his composure slipping just enough to show his need.
"Really....." Kento effortlessly whispered to you, his voice vibrating onto you like a wave crashing onto you at sea. "We shouldn't schedule much this New Year, hm? So we can be together."
"Hm.....Kento." You echo back to him, intoxicated by his touch. "'ake time....for me, okay? I'll.....I'll do the same."
“That's the plan already, you know?" he murmured, his lips brushing against your ear as he shifted, his hands tugging at the barriers between you. “Let me take care of you, like I always do.”
Soon after that, you could feel the wet, thick head of his member pressed against your entrance, the heat and pressure stealing the breath from your lungs. You gasped as he began to push in slowly, his movements deliberate, almost reverent.
It was too good, too damn easy to fall into a high to. You could feel the stretch inside of you, it made you so full. Everything about it was intoxicating, your body yielding to him as he filled you inch by inch, your walls clinging to every part of him like he was made to fit.
It was like he was trying to make a home inside of it. Inside of you. And it just made you feel so good. A deep, guttural groan rumbled in his chest, his forehead dropping to rest against yours as he buried himself deeper.
“Darling.” he muttered, his voice strained and low. “You feel so perfect.”
You whimpered, your hands clutching at his shoulders for support as your body adjusted to the delicious fullness. The sensation was overwhelming, the slight ache quickly giving way to a heat that spread through your entire body.
“Kento.” you breathed, the sound a mix of plea and surrender.
His large hands gripped your hips, holding you steady as he pulled back slightly before thrusting forward again, the motion slow but unyielding. Each movement sent a jolt of pleasure coursing through you, and the friction only made you crave more.
“God, this is so…..you feel so good.” he groaned, his voice rough and filled with need. “You’re so tight. I don’t know how I’m supposed to go slow like this with you.”
“Don’t, babe.” you gasped, your fingers digging into his shoulders. “Don’t hold back.”
His carmel eyes darkened almost instantly at your words, a flicker of something primal overtaking his usual control. With a growl, he began to move in earnest, each thrust deeper and harder than the last. The sound of your bodies meeting echoed in the stairwell, a symphony of shared desire that neither of you could hold back.
The rough texture of the wall behind you only heightened the sensation, grounding you as he took you apart piece by piece. You could feel your back burn against the concrete wall as you throw your head back against it. His lips found yours in a searing kiss, his tongue claiming your mouth as thoroughly as his body claimed yours.
“Darling, my pretty baby darling.” he murmured against your lips, his voice ragged and desperate. “You’re mine. Always mine.”
“Yes, babe. Yours….O–oh…only! Only yours!” you managed to gasp, your head tilting back as he kissed along your throat, his teeth grazing the sensitive skin.
The coil in your core once more tightens with every spark you feel as he pushes deeper over and over in a fast pace. Everything about the pleasure you feel keeps building to an almost unbearable peak. It just felt too good. He felt too good.
His pace quickened, his breaths coming in harsh pants as his control began to slip. One hand slid between your bodies, his thumb finding your sensitive nub and rubbing it in quick, precise circles.
You cried out, your body arching into him as the tension finally snapped. Pleasure crashed over you in waves, your walls clenching tightly around him as your release tore through you.
“Fuck, fuck. I’m close!” he groaned, his movements becoming erratic as he chased his own release. With one final, deep thrust, he shuddered against you, his body going taut as he spilled himself inside you.
For a moment, the only sound was your shared, labored breathing, the intimacy of the moment wrapping around you like a cocoon. His forehead rested against yours, his hands gentle as they smoothed over your thighs and waist, grounding you both.
“Are you okay?” he asked softly, his voice filled with concern despite the lingering haze of pleasure in his eyes.
You nodded, a small smile tugging at your lips. “More than okay.”
He chuckled, pressing a soft kiss to your temple before gently setting you back on your feet. His hands remained steady on your waist, holding you as your legs wobbled beneath you. You leaned into him, your breath uneven, your body still humming from the intensity of what had just transpired.
But that wasn’t the end of it, of course.
The hunger in his eyes hadn’t faded, and neither had yours. The raw desire that simmered between you was far from sated, and you both knew it. Kento’s hands lingered, his thumbs brushing soft, teasing circles against your hips as he studied your flushed face.
“I just think that I…..” he murmured, his voice a low rumble. “I still want more.”
You barely had time to process his words before your lover’s lips were on yours again, roughly consuming you in a kiss that was as demanding as it was all encompassing. Your hands quickly found their way to his shoulders, pulling him closer to you. Your body instinctively responds to the magnetic pull of his, over and over.
“We shouldn’t…” you whispered between kisses, though your voice lacked conviction. “It’s going to make people suspicious.”
“Probably not.” he agreed, his smirk returning as his hands slipped under the hem of your dress, trailing up your thighs. “But repercussions are damned when we’re hungry. I can’t stop. I know you won’t too..”
The wall pressed against your back once more as he claimed you all over again, the cool stairwell air doing nothing to cool the fire that raged between you. It was reckless, but neither of you cared. Not here, not now. Hunger demanded to be fed, and with Nanami Kento, you were always insatiable.
After a while, you were both removed from the plane of normalcy and you were both panting with joyous weariness. He presses a kiss against your jaw as you keep a steady bite on his neck. He grumbles against you as he gathers himself from seeing stars. You follow him soon after. You released his neck and started kissing his lips once more.
When you both found yourself satisfied, you both started to make yourselves as presentable as possible. Well, at least what remains presentable and salvageable for both of you. Kento ripped too much of your outfit as much as you did. Still, you both did not care.
“We should get you cleaned up.” he murmured, his tone tender as he placed his coat on your shoulders and adjusted it tenderly on you, to keep you warm. “I’ll call my car and then we’ll just hop in there. We’ll go to my hotel, okay?”
You nodded again, your cheeks flushing as the reality of your surroundings began to sink in. But as he laced his fingers with yours and led you back toward the main building, you couldn’t help but feel a warm glow of contentment.
Of course, things too did not go the way you both wanted once again. You didn’t know that there were many SNS photographers and gossip journalists waiting to catch some other celebrity in that area where Kento’s car was going to be. And that’s just how you were caught, not thinking about the logistics of it all.
But how could you? It was New Years.
You just got mindlessly blown with really, really, really good sex.
And you were together once again with your lover.
How could you think about anything else after all that?
Now, back in the present, the two of you sat in the quiet of your shared apartment. Nanami Kento’s calm demeanor was a stark contrast to your frazzled nerves. You sighed, looking up to your lover who presses a kiss on your forehead.
“You know this is going to be everywhere, babe.” you said, gesturing toward your phone.
He set his tea down and leaned back, regarding you with a look of quiet amusement. “Let them talk, darling. It was bound to happen eventually.”
You groaned. “Eventually I didn't need to include hickeys and a ruined coat. And oh god….. was I leaking your cum?”
You took your phone once again to inspect, but your lover took your phone with his free hand and put it away. You looked at him, almost sulky as one would look as a child. He laughs. He presses another kiss on your hair. Kento couldn’t help but smirk. Both acts had made your heart skip a beat.
“You look good in my coat though. I could hardly care if my cum was dripping out, darling.” he said simply. “I’m pretty sure I look just as ridiculous. You mauled my neck so happily after that first round.”
“You do look like you’ve been ravaged.” you shot back, though your cheeks burned at the memory. “I mean, it made sense at the time….I was hungry.”
“Hm, I don’t blame you.”
You sighed. “We’ll contact our PR and everyone later, okay?”
He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees, and reached out to tuck a stray strand of hair behind your ear. “Hm.” he said softly, his voice filled with the steady reassurance you’d always loved about him. “We’ll be fine, okay? I don’t care as long as I am with you.”
You sighed, leaning into his warm touch. “I guess the secret’s out, huh?”
He nodded, his gaze warm. “I don’t mind. As long as we're happy together, I say let them say whatever they want.”
You blinked at him. “You think so?”
“Hm.” He smiles at you. “Because no one will truly know who you are to me. That’s only mine. They’ll have a headline, but I’ll have the whole spreadsheet.”
You feel like your heart is melting with his tenderness. “I love you. So so much.”
“I love you too.” He kisses your lips, smiling wider at you.
And just like that, the storm outside felt a little less overwhelming.
#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x you#jjk x you#jjk x y/n#jujutsu kaisen x y/n#nanami kento x y/n#nanami kento x reader#nanami kento x you#kento nanami x y/n#nanami x reader#nanami x you#nanami x y/n#kento nanami x you#kento nanami x reader#kento x reader#kento x y/n#kento x you#nanami kento#kento nanami#jjk nanami#jujutsu nanami#jjk au#nanami smut#nanami kento smut#kento nanami smut#jjk smut#jjk x reader smut
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A/N: Never cared about superman until this new trailer came out. I'm a Clark girlie now. It's shame there's not many Yan!superfamily content out there. I plan to write more but I figured i'd get some thoughts out there.
Warnings: DeadDoveDon'tEat| Forced family, yandere themes, kidnapping, manipulation ect..


Living with Yan!superfam would be the most terrifying experience in the whole wide world. Yes, Clark Kent is such a sweetheart. Truly the embodiment of a "gentle giant", there's not a man on earth whose kinder...but there's also not one who is stronger.
How frightening would it be to innocently deny your father of bonding time and hear him say---
"I didn't quite hear you. Could you repeat yourself, Honey?"
---and you turn around to face this six and a half foot brooding man who is towering over you with a sickeningly sweet smile....
You and I both know he heard you loud and clearly, he can hear someone laugh half way across the world. Papa Clark just wanted to see if you really had the audacity to repeat yourself.
OH and the fact he has telepathy? Clark has sworn on his life that he'd never use those abilities on anyone outside of criminals, let alone his precious family but there's times where it feels there's something rummaging through you brain.. picking at every little part.
--and it always seems to happen late at night, when everyone is supposedly sleeping.
Speaking of his telepathy powers, could you imagine him erasing parts of your memories? One time while he was holding you in his arms, all you could think about was your past...your real parents and siblings...how you wished his arms were theirs...
Clark's jealousy would overwhelm him and next thing you know you can't even remember much about them at all...
Or fantasizing about escaping while at dinner and having your train of thought ripped right from you as he silently watches you from across the table.. You know that there's something wrong but you can't quite place it and he finally speaks up
"Everything alright, sweetheart? You look a little disgruntled."
One thing Clark does is swoop you into his arms without much warning and flies. That seems like so much fun but you hate them. Rightfully so. Intentional or not, it's a reminder how helpless you truly are when in a blink of an eye you're thousands of feet up in the air . He'd never drop his precious daughter, but you don't know that. Not when he just levitates there, looking at you with a sickness in his eyes..mind racing and heart pounding. He loves you so much, what would he ever do if he lost his only girl.
Clark constantly pushes to be close to you and to be the perfect father. It's so surreal waking up in a "perfect" cookie cutter family. It's as if you were in some 1950's film about a nuclear family, everything feels like it's taken right from a script.
It really reminds you that they are aliens trying their hardest to conform to a human way of life. You feel bad for being so reclusive when it's clear that your Father wants your life to be perfect, but you can't shake the fear you have for them.
You would almost feel bad if they didn't kidnap you or could snap your spine with a single finger...
Oh don't get me started on your little brother Jon. He's just like his dad. Loving and full of sugar, until you do something to shatter the image of their perfect family.
You rejected playing with him and suddenly he's *literally* dragging you into his room to play Legos. Or you told him that he's "not really your brother and that you have a real family somewhere else." and He's blowing out your eardrums during a tantrum..
*never make Jon scream and cry, noted.*
Oh one time he threw an emotional fit so hard that he almost shot a Laser beam at you. He genuinely didn't mean to, he would never purposefully put your life in danger but he's still not in full control of his powers yet. Very blessed that Clark was there that day to settle things.
Yeah. The boy frequently forgets just how fragile you are. Clark is able to control himself in order to protect you and everyone else but Jon struggles so much. Accidental bruises and broken bones are a frequent thing in this household, much to Clark's dismay.
He can scold his son all day but when he sees his sister waiting for him to get off the school bus, he can't help but throw himself into her. Maybe its the pulling, grabbing, and yanking her a little too harshly out of excitement is the root cause.
He's always wanting to show of his powers in order to make you think he's cool and deserving of your love..
Lois is completely bliss to everything that's going on. She seems to be rather confused why you're taking so long to adjust but honestly I think Clark has her mentally wiped.
What if he only kidnapped you because he desperately wanted a daughter. Like Papa Clark gives off "girl dad" vibes but Lois couldn't have another. When he saw you, oh you were so perfect. He didn't care if you looked like him or not, you were his baby girl. You were perfect for this family.
#headcanon#imagines#x reader#oneshot#yandere imagines#headcannons#yandere headcanons#fanfic#dc comics#yandere superfam#yandere superman#platonic yandere#yandere clark kent#platonic yandere superman#tw.yandere#yandere family#clark kent x reader#clark kent x female reader#jon kent#yandere jon kent
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RAIN LILIES
pairing: soulmate idol choi beomgyu x soulmate fem!reader
Sitting at parties surrounded by lovers, a silent third wheel at movie nights, the friend holding the camera at weddings—your hands are always... alone in the spaces where others are full.
Were you an error in the grand scheme? An anomaly? A glitch in the unforgiving script? Or maybe, he simply doesn’t really… exist.
That’s how you ended up here, standing beside your korean-pop-obsessed friend who practically dragged you out and swore you’d love the show. It all became a blur when your eyes met his.
He’s on stage, gripping the mic impossibly still, staring down back at you like he feels it too.
He shouldn’t be real.
warnings: red-string au, strangers to lovers, reader is two years older, normal society norms, waiting, anxiety, doubts, sasaengs, insecurities, hasty decisions, drunk-in-love beomgyu. pov switching. everything written is a work of fiction. let me know if I missed anything.
smut-warnings: MDNI, explicit-descriptions, missionary, fingering, oral!fem receiving, dom beomgyu.
wc: 20k — playlist.
notes: fighting both my delulu and my demons while writing this. 😭 Might just be the fic I enjoyed writing the most—I hope you love it just as much! so glad to be part of this beautiful event. a big thank you to my beta reader.
1/5 part of the valentine event with talented moas! see the full masterlist here.

If fate promised you something so certain, how could you not long for it?
Since childhood, you’ve heard the stories. The way people speak in hushed voices, weaving fate into riddles, how somewhere out there, it's waiting—a single red string, unseen until the exact moment it’s meant to appear.
The rules are simple: the second your eyes meet theirs, a delicate crimson thread will wrap and tug around your ring finger, stretching across, tied to the one who is destined to love you.
You watched it happen to everyone else. From playground giggles in elementary school to whispered confessions in high school hallways, to late-night talks in college dorm rooms. You listened as your friends spoke about finding their own soulmates, the feeling—the pull, the process. It's everywhere. In the way, your parents fit together like pages of the same story. On the way your younger sister—still so new to the world found her match.
When you’re told your whole life that destiny is waiting for you, how could you not ache for it?
The universe doesn’t make mistakes. And yet, your hands remained... stringless.
And now you wonder if it did—with you.
"One, two, three, smile!"
You press the shutter, capturing the way they look at each other. You lower the camera, but they don’t even notice—they’re too caught up in their own little world, whispering sentences only they’ll ever understand. They laugh, eyes soft, bodies leaning in just a little closer.
How does love do that? How does it make someone shine like they’re carrying sunlight beneath their skin? Like just standing beside the right person is enough to set them alight?
And why, no matter how long you wait, does that light never seem to find you?
There are days you curse it—this cruel design, this aching uncertain certainty. You tell yourself it would be easier not to know, to live without the quiet hope that somewhere, someone is meant to find you, or that fate had already written your name beside someone else’s.
And then there are days you fear it.
What if they don’t want to find you? What if that’s why you’re still alone? What if they got it wrong, skipped over your name, and he simply… doesn’t exist?
You're an anomaly. A glitch in the well-made script.
You lost count of how many times you wished it was never made this way. That love shouldn’t be a promise. Yet in the deepest hours of the night, you found yourself—gasping, trembling, and sobbing to your palms. The feeling of—
How can you miss someone you've never met?
You want to reach for a hand you’ve never held. You long for a voice you’ve never heard, a scent you’ve never breathed, a shadow you’ve never chased. And more than anything, you wish you had a name to whisper, to give you hope.
You swallow, forcing a smile as you turn back to the couple. "Congratulations," you say, "It’s a beautiful wedding."
"Thank you, Y/N!" Ha-rin squeals, practically glowing as she steps forward to hug you. "And thank you for being our photographer—I know you must be busy."
"You’re welcome," you reply, adjusting your camera strap. "It’s what I do, after all."
Ju-won steps in then, reaching for Ha-rin’s hand like he can’t stand even a moment of space between them. "Thank you, Y/N," he says, his eyes never straying far from his wife.
They were your high school classmates. You remember the day they met—first year, first morning, when their eyes met across the classroom, and just like that, the red string appeared. They grew together, from awkward introductions to effortless friendship, and now, here they were, husband and wife.
A picture of everything the universe had promised them.
Ju-won leans in, pressing a kiss to Ha-rin’s cheek like it’s the first time, like they haven’t spent years by each other’s side. The look in their eyes is so easy, so full of love, that you have to look away.
You can't look.
"Uh, I’ll get some drinks," you say, forcing a smile that feels as out of place as you do. You don’t wait for a response. You just turn, your heels clicking against the polished floor, head spinning as you try to count how many weddings you’ve attended this year.
Or no. You’ve lost count.
Everyone you grew up with—your friends, your classmates—have already found their soulmates. Most are married now, some already raising children.
Your heels dig into your feet with each hurried step, but you don’t slow down. You just keep moving, past everyone. You know exactly where you’ll end up. The same place you always do.
Alone at the sidelines.
You grab a drink, bringing it to your lips a little too quickly, hoping the cool burn will settle the unease twisting in your stomach.
"Hey! It’s been a while!" A voice cuts calls out, familiar—but not familiar enough. You turn to see a girl skidding towards you, her face vaguely recognizable. A former classmate? A clubmate? Someone who once sat next to you in a lecture hall?
"How have you been?" she asks, taking a drink for herself.
"I’m fine, thanks," you reply, forcing an easy nod before taking another sip.
A second passes, and then another girl joins the conversation, breathless with laughter. "Beom-seok finally let me go," she teases, tilting her head toward the man across the room—her soulmate. "The guy’s obsessed."
"Of course he is," the first girl grins. "He’s your soulmate." She swirls her drink before adding, "Mine just got back from overseas. He’ll see me tomorrow once he’s in the city." And there it is again—circling back to the same topic, the one you can never take part in. You nod, offering a small smile, pretending to listen.
Because what is there to say when everyone else has something you don’t?
"Y/N?" Your name pulls you out of your thoughts.
"Huh?"
"Did you meet yours yet?" The question hits like a slow, squeezing ache in your chest.
"No," you say, reaching for another drink. It's embarrassing that everyone knows you're empty. "I haven't."
"That's… weird, right?" The first girl tilts her head, genuinely puzzled. "I mean, we sat through those lectures together. Didn’t the studies say most people find their soulmate before twenty-five? That’s what the records say."
There’s no malice in her voice, just matter-of-fact. Like she’s pointing out a statistic, saying out what’s already been made painfully clear to you. it’s the same tired reminder, the same unspoken question: what’s wrong with you?
You’re used to it by now.
"Yeah," you say, unwilling to argue. What’s the point? Your mind slips back to those reckless high school days—the days when older girls, too cool and too cruel, mocked you for not having a soulmate. You remember snapping back, pretending their words didn’t sting.
Later, the tears came on the bus ride home—carving rivers down your cheeks as you sob. Strangers offered tissues, soft words, awkward kindness, but none of it could stitch you back together. You remember your mother's words after seeing her home. To stop them from hurting you, you have to accept all of yourself.
But how do you accept the whole of you, when it doesn’t even feel like you have all of you?
From the corner of your eye, you catch the second girl nudging her. "Don’t mind her, Y/N," she says quickly. "She doesn’t always think before she talks." Then, after a beat, she adds, "Have you tried dating in the meantime? You know, while you're waiting?"
You blink at her, taken aback.
"I mean, it's not like it’s cheating, right? Since you haven’t met them yet."
You set your drink down, your fingers suddenly cold. "Why are you suggesting something you wouldn’t even do?" Your voice is calm, but it makes her shift uncomfortably. "Or did you? Does your soulmate know?"
Neither of them speaks. Guilt in their expressions. You don’t wait for an answer. You're done for tonight.
It’s time to go.
You turn away, not bothering to look back. No one needs you here—your part is done. Your role here is over. You pull out your phone, quickly typing out a polite apology to the bride before slipping it back into your pocket.
The drive home is silent, and the buzz of the engine is the only company you have. Your hands grip the wheel a little too tightly, your thoughts drifting despite your best efforts to keep them at bay. When you finally reach your small apartment, you step out, clutching yet another wedding souvenir in one hand a meaningless token of a night that wasn’t yours to celebrate.
You lock the door behind you and lean against it blinking, exhaling shakily. "I guess today wasn’t the day either," you murmur to no one in particular, wiping away the single tear that managed to escape. "What's taking you so long?"
No matter how often you whispered this question, it never hurt any less.

"What's taking you so long?"
Beomgyu groans from under the covers, trying to burrow deeper into the warmth of his bed. The sudden tug of his blanket makes him blindly reach out, attempting to grab it back. "You shi—"
"Beomgyu, you're the last one. We're all almost ready to go," Soobin says, adjusting his belt in the mirror. "Look at this little child."
Beomgyu stretches with a dramatic yawn. "I'm up, I'm up," he mumbles, sitting up sluggishly and blinking against the light. He swings his legs over the edge of the bed, feet landing on the bedside table. Soobin shakes his head but doesn't stick around—his job is done. Beomgyu is finally awake.
Minutes later, Beomgyu trudges into the living room, hair a mess, voice still deep with sleep. "Are we eating there?"
The entire room turns to look at him.
"You woke up late, and that’s the first thing you care about?" Yeonjun teases, shaking his head with a laugh.
"Well, I didn’t eat last night," Beomgyu grumbles.
"Oh?"
"Liar," the maknae pipes up from the couch, casually applying lip balm. "You literally snuck out to eat."
"You snitch," Beomgyu gasps, feigning betrayal. "I didn’t raise you to turn on me like this!"
"You? Raise me?" Kai scoffs. "Soobin hyung’s the one who raised me, what are you talking about?"
Soobin smirks and chucks Beomgyu’s towel straight at his face. "Exactly. Now go shower, you idiot."
Laughter erupts around the room as Beomgyu groans, trudging toward the bathroom. "Shower quick, hyung," Taehyun calls out.
"Yeah, yeah, whatever."
Beomgyu’s slightly damp hair clings to the back of his neck. He hadn’t had time to dry it properly before they rushed out of the dorm—there was no room for delays today. A broadcast for their comeback. Another promotion. His stylist would handle it in the green room anyway.
They pile into the van, the usual quiet settling over them. Despite being fully dressed and ready, exhaustion hangs heavy. One by one, his members drift off, heads resting against windows, bodies slumped in their seats. Only Kai remains awake, lost in his own world, music pulsing through his earphones. The maknae was so engrossed on his phone, obviously texting with a small smile on his face.
Beomgyu sighs, pressing his forehead against the cool glass, his breath slightly fogging up the window. Today would be a long day. Rehearsals, performances, a challenge video, taping. He missed this. He missed MOAs. The rush of the stage. The high of performing. And then—
Oh.
The van slows at a red light, and his gaze drifts absentmindedly to the sidewalk. His chest tightens.
A couple walks by, laughing, hands intertwined, completely lost in their own world. The way they move together, effortlessly in sync. In love. Content. Happy. He stares longer than he should.
He can't look away.
His throat feels tight as the van lurches forward again, pulling him out of his thoughts. He blinks hard, shifting in his seat. The image stayed, pressed into the back of his mind.
All four of his members had already found theirs—their soulmates. The one they could lean on when the world became too loud. Beomgyu was happy for them, of course, he was. He remember how he was when Kai blushed when he met his soulmate recently, right after his 23rd birthday.
Everyone teased the maknae relentlessly for weeks.
Beomgyu had been too busy his whole life, training since he was just a kid, running full speed toward a dream. His mind is busy to the point he sometimes forgets it. He does not mean to. It's just that—he never let himself dwell on it for too long. Pushing it aside became second nature, the same way he’d forget to eat when he was too busy, too distracted.
But every year, without fail, when the room dimmed and the birthday candles in front of him, his wish was always the same.
His soulmate.
It didn’t matter how many years passed or how much he achieved—when the glow of those tiny flames danced in his eyes, it was the only thing his heart whispered.
Beomgyu exhales shakily, his fingers curling into his hoodie. a quiet sigh slipping from his pouting lips.
Where are you?

The stark white walls of the hospital room loom over, mocking your awkwardness.
"There's nothing wrong with you, dear," the woman in front of you says, her lab coat lending a sense of authority to her words. Her voice is gentle, reassuring, but it barely soothes the unease twisting in your chest. "Soulmates do tend to find each other early, statistically speaking. But that’s just a pattern, not a guarantee."
You swallow hard. The lump in your throat stays put. "Is there… any chance this is a mistake?" Your voice is quieter than you intend, fragile in a way you hate. "That someone could go their whole life without one? That—" you hesitate, your chest tightening, "that I’m just… meant to be alone?"
Something flickers across her face—pity, maybe. You’re not sure. "I’ll look into it, I promise," she says after a moment. "I know twenty-six feels late, and I know it’s frustrating. But… trust in destiny a little longer. If you want, I can also recommend a therapist. I know the pressure can get to you."
Her words are meant to be comforting. They only make the weight in your chest heavier. You shake your head, managing a quiet “thank you” before slipping out of the room, the door clicking shut behind you.
“How was it?” Da-hee’s voice reaches you before you even look up. She’s already on her feet, eyes scanning your face, searching for an answer. “What did they say?”
“Nothing I haven’t heard before.” You sigh, walking past her. “I told you I should not do this.”
She huffs, crossing her arms as she falls into step beside you. “You never tried it,”
Your best friend doesn’t argue anymore, following you to the counter in silence. The cashier barely looks up as they say, “That consultation is $120 total, plus taxes, bringing it to $145.86. Card or cash?”
You catch Da-hee reaching for her wallet, but you gently push her hand away. “Don’t,” you murmur. “This was for me.”
You hand over your card. A quick swipe, a faint beep. And just like that, you’re down nearly $150 with nothing to show for it but a sinking feeling in your stomach.
That much money for a consultation. A conversation. No treatment, no tests, nothing tangible. Soulmate doctors are expensive. Too expensive. And health insurance? Useless. They don’t cover something as rare, as unquantifiable, as soulmate problems.
Because to them, it’s not a real sickness, proving that you are—once again—the outlier.
Perfect.
“Come on,” you say, nudging your still-guilty-looking friend. She follows you out of the hospital, quiet and pouting.
At the car, she pulls open the driver’s side door. “Let me at least drive?” she offers, voice softer now.
You chuckle at her persistence, shaking your head before tossing her the keys. “Okay.” Sliding into the passenger seat, you reach for the radio, as she pulls out of the parking lot.
"Let's hang out at your place," Da-hee says, and she grins as she sees you nod your head.
Music played softly through the speakers, blending with the casual flow of conversation. The air is light, and easy—until your car rolls past a towering black building.
HYBE.
Funeral wreaths. Trucks. Massive banners.
Your brows furrow as you take it in, the sight so jarring that it silences you for a beat. The road ahead clogs with slowed traffic, people lingering to gawk at the scene.
“What the fuck?” Da-hee mutters, gripping the steering wheel a little tighter, eyes darting across the scene. The traffic slows as more people crane their necks to look. You do the same, stomach twisting at the sheer scale of it. "This is insane."
“What’s going on?” you ask, still trying to piece together the meaning behind it all.
She exhales, lips pressing into a thin line. “Lee Heeseung. An idol,” she starts. “News got out that he recently went out with his soulmate.” Her voice dips, sadness flickering across her face. “And now… now, people want him out of the group.”
Your stomach twists. “What?”
You strain to read the bold, angry messages plastered across the banners:
GET LEE HEESEUNG OUT OF HYBE.
APOLOGIZE, LEE HEESEUNG.
EXPLAIN THIS, LEE HEESEUNG.
ENHYPEN IS NOW ONLY SIX.
IDOLS WITH SOULMATES ARE NOT IDOLS.
The messages feel suffocating, each one worse than the last. Then you see it—one of the trucks, its LED screen flashing an image like a public execution.
A man, young and striking, caught mid-laughter as he eats ramen with a girl beside him. She’s smiling too, her expression warm, content. The matching caps on their heads make them look like any ordinary couple, but the grainy, long-lens quality of the photo gives it away. Someone had been watching. Someone had been waiting to expose them.
Your stomach turns.
“It’s worse when so many fans are… young,” Da-hee murmurs, her voice barely above a whisper. “Most of them are stringless.” She says the last word carefully like she doesn’t want to offend you.
But you almost hear what she isn’t saying.
Stringless people can’t understand the soulmate bond. And when it comes to idols, that misunderstanding twists into darker. As insane as it sounds, they feel entitled. Possessive. Like their devotion should be enough. Like an idol’s life—who they love, who they belong to—should be theirs to control.
It’s the only explanation, isn’t it?
The car inches forward, and your eyes drift back to the scene outside. Security guards push against the surging crowd, their faces strained. The banners wave wildly, like battle flags in a war meant to punish.
You swallow hard. “I don’t get it.” You don’t know him. You don't need to know him to know the injustice of it. “Why treat him like he committed some kind of crime? He’s meant to have someone. He’s a person, not—” You gesture vaguely at the protest, frustration bubbling up. “Not their property.”
Da-hee sighs. “That’s why idols who are caught with their soulmates—especially the ones who confirm it, get cancelled. Fans turn on them. They lose everything.” She shakes her head, voice laced with exhaustion and resignation. “It’s sad that they have to hide it.”
The thought of society hating someone just for loving who they’re meant to love makes your chest feel tight. How could something meant to be beautiful turn into this?
You guess your own situation isn’t the only cruel, unfair thing in this world.
The two of you make it back to your apartment, settling in for a movie with a bowl of popcorn between you. The glow of the TV flickers across the room, a comfortable silence stretching between you—until Da-hee suddenly squeals, nearly knocking the popcorn over in the process.
“Oh my god,” she gasps, shoving the popcorn bowl off her lap as she scrambles to her feet. “OH MY GOD.” She starts stomping in place.
You glance at her, unimpressed. “I want to wipe that ridiculous grin off your face.”
She just giggles and shoves her phone in front of you. “Joon bought me VVIP tickets. I’m going to die.” She pumps a fist in the air, bouncing on her toes like a kid who just won the lottery. “And there’s two. He can’t go—oh my god. Please, please, I am begging you to come with me. It’s next week! That sneaky bastard didn’t even tell me he bought them ages ago.”
You hesitate, already feeling the excuse forming on your tongue. “I don’t think—”
“Come on, Y/N.” She grabs your arm, shaking it dramatically. “Look at me. I have a soulmate, and I still thirst over Tomorrow X Together.”
You nearly choke on your drink. “That’s a long-ass name.”
“They’re my babies,” she says, clutching her chest like she’s been personally blessed by the gods. “You’ll love the show, I promise. And maybe—you’ll be like me. While you wait for your soulmate, it’s harmless to fangirl a little. OMG, what if you become a MOA? That’s my dream. Imagine us going to cafés with photocards, buying merch, collecting albums—”
“Okay, first of all, they are grown men. Not babies.” you cut in before she spirals. You know from experience that once she starts talking about her fangirl life, she never stops. “Anyways, okay, I’ll go. But don’t expect anything.”
Da-hee lets out another excited squeal before launching herself at you, wrapping her arms around your neck and squeezing way too tight.
“You won’t regret this!”
You already do.
It was your turn to trail behind Da-hee like a lost puppy, weaving through the sea of fans decked out in carefully coordinated outfits. Everyone is well dressed. So prepared. Keychains and accessories dangled from their bags, the sound of clinking metal filling the air.
"Look at them," Da-hee suddenly stopped, pulling out her phone. You followed her gaze to the massive banner hanging outside the arena.
TOMORROW X TOGETHER
They... didn’t look bad.
"My husbands," Da-hee sighed dreamily spinning turning to you with wide eyes. "Let's take a selfie!"
Before you could protest, she yanked you in, holding her phone high. The two of you posed—her grinning ear to ear, you looking like a reluctant daughter humoring her overexcited mom.
At the ticketing section, an attendant handed you both event wristbands and ID laces. You're about to shove yours into your pocket, but Da-hee looped it around your neck like a medal.
“So you don’t lose it,” she said firmly.
You sighed, adjusting the strap as you followed her toward a merch booth. Fans swarmed the display, eyes gleaming as they scanned the shelves stacked with albums, shirts, and accessories.
"Everyone's so hyped," you muttered, glancing around. "I can see a lot of Da-hees here."
"Of course they are," Da-hee said ignoring your last comment with a dramatic sway of her hand. She skimmed the display. "This comeback is a masterpiece."
You frowned. "What are we even doing here?"
"You need a picket." She says. "And don’t even think about saying no. I’m still heartbroken you refused the lightstick, so at least take this. We’re gonna be right at the barricades, you can’t just stand there empty-handed. Pick one."
You groaned, "Fine."
Your eyes sweep over the options, scanning each face printed on the glossy boards. You won’t say it out loud—not yet—but you’ll admit it now. They’re all… ridiculously handsome.
And one of them stands out.
Soft brown eyes. A small, almost knowing smile. Something about his face makes your breath hitch. "Uh..."
Da-hee leans in, brow furrowing. "What are you picking? Wait. Are you okay? Why are you so red—"
"I'm not," You quickly pointed at the picket, avoiding her stare like your life depended on it. "This one."
A slow, mischievous grin spreads across her face. "Oh-ho." She turns to the waiting merch seller, smiling some more.
"One Beomgyu, please."
You followed her... once again.
You didn’t have much of a choice. But this time, your steps felt… lighter. Movements are less reluctant than when you first arrived.
You weren’t sure why. Maybe it was the way the heat had finally eased, the golden glow of late afternoon settling over the pavement. Maybe it was the way MOAs—total strangers—smiled at you like you belonged, their warmth making you feel strangely at ease. Maybe it was the fact of not hearing the word soulmate even once. That you don't feel the odd one out.
Or maybe—just maybe—it was the picket you now held carefully in your hands.
You didn’t know how it happened. How you went from teasing Da-hee about her obsession to clutching a piece of laminated paper like it meant something. But the more you looked around, the more you understood.
It wasn’t just about the idols printed on banners or the music playing faintly in the background. But also, it was about them. These people who glowed with excitement, who found joy in simply being here, in loving unapologetically.
You were sceptical of it at first, seeing the front of HYBE last week. The protest. But just like everything, you saw it. The good side of being a fan.
How they shined—not only because of who they adored, but because of how they adored. How happy they were to love, and to share that love with everyone around them.
And somehow, standing here among them, you felt a little brighter, too.
"Where are we going now?"
"MOAZONE," Da-hee answers without hesitation, pulling you toward yet another booth. The concert doors won’t open for another thirty minutes, but she’s on a mission. The funny thing is—she doesn’t really need to drag you anymore.
Something has settled in your bones. You’re going to see this through, stay until the last song fades. And maybe—you’ll find yourself here again next time.
"It’s a booth where you can pull a concert-exclusive photocard," she explains further, eyes shining with excitement.
You nod, letting her lead the way. The line is long. When it’s finally Da-hee’s turn, she gasps, then squeals so loudly people around her chuckle. "Yeonjun!" she cries, clutching the card to her chest like it’s the most precious thing in the world. "I got him!"
Then, it’s your turn.
A row of face-down cards is laid out before you. You don’t think too hard about it—you just point to one.
The staff hands it over, and when you flip it, your breath catches.
"You got Beomgyu?!" Da-hee shrieks, bouncing on her toes beside you. You barely hear her. Because there he is.
Elbow propped up, chin resting on his hand, that same small, knowing smile—only this time, it’s wider.
Fucking hell.
Da-hee grabs your arm, shaking you. "Girl, you are officially a Beomgyu magnet. I'm unfriending you if don't start liking them,"
Beomgyu.
Beomgyu. His name loops in your mind, over and over. And for some reason, it fits. His name suits him.
You tried your best not to break a smile. "Come on,"
If you had told yourself a year ago that you’d be here—crammed into a packed venue, surrounded by screaming teenagers—you would’ve laughed. Hard.
And yet, here you are, laughing. Not at the absurdity of it, but with it. Caught up in the moment with Da-hee, the crowd’s energy vibrates as hundreds of voices chant their names.
“It’s soundcheck first,” Da-hee leans in, her voice barely cutting through the noise. “Then the main concert.”
You nod, still grinning. “Okay.”
Then, the opening notes of a song play through the speakers. The crowd erupts. “Oh my god!” Da-hee shrieks, “It’s Deja Vu!”
The five of them step onto the stage. It’s a blur—lights flashing, voices screaming. Your heart pounds against your ribs as the music swells, wrapping around you like something alive.
It’s beautiful.
A tall man—easily the tallest—moves toward your section, waving with an easy smile, deep dimples carving into his soft-looking cheeks. It reminds you of bread. The warmth of it is infectious, and before you even realise it, you're waving back, grinning at someone whose name you didn’t even know this morning.
Then, the song begins to wind down. And that’s when you see him.
Beomgyu.
His steps are slower than the others, like he’s taking his time, scanning the crowd with careful eyes. You tell yourself not to look. Not when he gets closer. Not when that strange, restless nervousness twists in your stomach. You clench your fists and stare at the ground. Why? Why does this feel so overwhelming?
Around you, voices grew. The energy shifts, and you know it’s only a matter of time before you give in. You look up, unsure.
The mic is at his lips, his voice singing into the melody—until suddenly, he stops.
All because his eyes meet yours.
Everything else fades. The crowd, the shake of Da-hee beside you, even the music that was supposed to be loud. All that’s left is the pull—a red thread stretching between, searing itself into your vision, blinding in its intensity—demanding to be seen.
On stage, he stands impossibly still, his fingers gripping the mic like he sees it too.
It can't be real.

“We're trending again,” Taehyun says, flopping onto Beomgyu’s hotel bed with a sigh. “What the hell?”
Beomgyu leans back against the headboard, “How much time do we have?”
Taehyun checks his watch. “Practice is in… oh. Hours.” He exhales, shaking his head in awe. “This is actually happening. A sold-out stadium, Beomgyu. Can you believe that? Remember that tiny, run-down building we used to train in? The cracked floorboards, the growing mushrooms?” He laughs, eyes distant.
“When Yeonjun used to sneak his soulmate in, trying to show off like he was already famous? As a trainee. And now—now, we’re here.”
Beomgyu snorts. “In that practice room, too. I still don’t know how his soulmate put up with that. Or how Yeonjun didn’t get kicked out.”
“Yeah. They just couldn’t let go of each other.” Taehyun laughs, shaking his head. “And I don't think Big Hit will let go of him too."
It had been one of the first rules drilled into them during training—no soulmates. No... searching. And if they already had one? They had to tell them. Have the conversation. An agreement that would turn everything into a secret.
Soulmates were inevitable, unstoppable. Beomgyu still remembers the contract in his hands, the way he read every word over and over, heart pounding. As if somewhere in the fine print, there was a clause that might hurt his soulmate. In the end, he signed.
If he ever found his soulmate, no one could know. Not until everything was over. In other words, disbandment.
"I'm missing her like crazy these days."
Beomgyu doesn’t respond right away. He just shrugs, tossing things out of his suitcase—a hoodie, a toothbrush, whatever his hands find first. He had noticed how restless Taehyun had been, the way he kept his phone glued to his hands, typing, hesitating, typing again. But what was there to say? What could he do about it?
The others were good at pretending. Hiding. The quiet hotel meetups, the stolen hours between schedules. But if Beomgyu was being honest, he could count on both hands the number of times any of the four had actually been with their soulmates since debut.
The fear of getting caught kept them all in line. Not just by the company, but by the fans. The horror stories weren’t just industry rumours—some were ancient, some recent.
If this doesn’t work out, I don’t know if I can take it. Taehyun had said that once. This career was everything. He wasn’t going to risk it. He wasn't ready. And Beomgyu understood. Everyone understood. He could already picture the protest trucks outside the company building if anyone ever slipped up.
"You heard anything from Heeseung?" Taehyun asks, his voice careful, his fingers tightening around his phone. Beomgyu knows him well enough to catch the shift—the way his mind drifts, went from missing his soulmate to remembering the latest scandal in their world.
Heeseung, the newest idol thrown into the fire.
He, who got caught with his soulmate.
"Yeah," Beomgyu says, swallowing. "He's okay, but… his soulmate is taking the worst of it."
Taehyun stills. The thought of his own soulmate being dragged into something like that—starts to burn at the back of his mind. What if it were her?
"Hey, don't overthink it," Beomgyu says because he sees it. He sees it in all of them. The quiet way they carry it, that they aren’t supposed to want. In their world, the idea that you should be free with your soulmate is just that—an idea. Or maybe worse. A peril. A risk too big to take.
He remembers Soobin crying once, blaming himself for wanting this life—this job. And how, in the end, the only person who could calm him down was his soulmate. The same person the company treated like a liability. Yet, the only one with the power to bring their leader back to himself.
The irony.
He also remembers the night he sat with his dad, asking him how he knew Mom was his. He had tilted his head, recounting their encounter, before he said one thing that stuck with him.
"Before I even saw the string, I knew… it was her."
Beomgyu used to cringe at that. Now, he wonders if he'll ever get the chance to feel it.
“Did you see everyone? Insane.” Yeonjun says, eyes wide as they sit in the salon-like chairs. “They’ve been out there since last night.”
Kai glances at him as much as he can without moving his head, his makeup artist carefully blending eyeshadow. “Yeah, I saw them. MOAs are bundled up out there, and it’s freezing. It's worrying me.”
"I feel like I'm about to throw up. I'm nervous,"
Playing a stadium—a sold-out one, this is the dream. The one every trainee chases, the one Beomgyu used to stare at the ceiling imagining, too afraid to believe it could ever be real. And yet, here it is.
His mind pulls him back to the past. The long nights, the aching muscles, the quiet sobs muffled into his pillow. The moments of doubt, the voices—his own, the other's—telling him he wasn’t enough. He remembers how hard they worked. How hard he worked. How many times they shared one meal because they couldn't afford another one. And still, somehow, they held on.
He knows he earned this, and fought for it with everything he had. But standing here now, bathed in the price of it all, it still doesn’t feel real. He stares at his hands once his stylist is done with his eyes. There’s something else tugging at him, a strange feeling that’s been lurking since morning.
What it is, he can’t quite say.
Beomgyu's eyes sweep over the big space. The kind of big that makes his head spin if he thinks about it too much. In a few hours, this place will be much packed. He’s been—on stages just like this, under lights just as bright but somehow, it still knocks the wind out of him.
It's soundcheck. He likes it because, with the lights up, he can actually see everyone. It was one of the rare moments he could see faces. He likes it as much as the offline fan signs. They move through the set, running back and forth across the stage, but his feet keep pulling him toward one side—like an instinct.
Beomgyu likes looking at MOAs. It feels good. Familiar, almost. Sometimes, he even recognizes a face— it was a feeling like a reminder of home, a classmate from school, someone he’d seen before. And then there’s the simple joy of it all. The way someone’s face brightens up because of him. It never gets old. It never stops making him happy, too.
But then, he notices one weird thing.
It’s strange. He’s right here. He could understand if you were looking at another member—fans have their favourites, after all. But you’re not looking at anyone. You're staring at the floor?
You’re not looking at all.
He tilts his head, trying to see better—to get a curious glimpse, and suddenly, his whole world shifts. His heart slams to a stop. It’s so sudden, so overwhelming, he almost stumbles forward, yanking him toward the barricade. "What?"
And then—you move, as if you heard his thoughts.
Just the slightest turn of your head, your face lifting, eyes locking onto his. He stops breathing. His fingers go numb around the mic. Everything slows, softens, blurs at the edges until there’s nothing but this moment. Just the two of you, staring.
The closeness of Beomgyu makes the crowd shift, bodies pressing closer—but you don’t move. You just stand there—still, steady—while the rest of the world shifts around you. Like the last grain of sand in an hourglass, holding on as everything else rushes past.
He swears he would’ve stayed like that forever—frozen, staring, lost—if not for the firm hand on his shoulder. A small tug. He blinks, the spell breaking just enough for reality to slip back in.
"Beomgyu? What's wrong?" Soobin. His leader gives him a look of worry and urgency, and that’s when he hears it, the music. He closes his agape lips, and clears his throat. The song is still playing. Right. He’s supposed to be—
But then his gaze flickers back to you.
It’s nothing, he tells himself. You’re just so so pretty. That’s all. Maybe it was your eyes or your hair or the way you did it. It was just fucking cute. It doesn’t mean anything. And—
His breath falters. He sees it.
He hadn’t noticed before. He had been too busy looking at you. Too caught up in the moment that he missed it entirely. Something all of the members have. Something Beomgyu had waited for his whole life.
The thread.
Thin, and so impossibly red. A string stretched between, glowing faintly under the stage lights. He looks down at his hand—at his ring finger— it's tied there. His eyes trace its path. To you. His chest tightens.
"Before I even saw the string, I knew… it was her."
Soulmate.
You’re his. After everything—after all this time—
He finally found you.
The dressing room is a blur of movement, stylists rushing, last-minute adjustments being made, and voices overlapping but he just sits there. Staring at the floor.
He’s dressed. He’s ready. He should be used to this by now, the pre-show jitters, the nervous energy that always sits in his chest before he steps on stage. But—his soulmate is out there. Somewhere in the crowd. And the thought grips him so tight it almost hurts. What if he never sees you again? What if you’re gone before he can find you?
Your face lingers in his mind, vivid and haunting. The way the lights hit your dress, the way you looked at him—it knocked the breath right out of his lungs. He was completely unprepared for it. You were so beautiful that he almost forgot what he was doing.
He’s never been shaken like that before. Not in his personal life. Not as an idol. Not in school, at the company, on stage, meeting seniors, at award shows—never.
Waiting for the music queue, he finally lifts his head.
Muscle memory takes over. His body knows what to do. He’s trained for this, conditioned for it. Every movement, every note, every expression—it’s muscle memory now. His instincts take over before his thoughts can catch up. This is his life. His career. The one thing he chose, out of everything he could have been. How many people in the world get to do this? To stand under those lights, to hear thousands of voices calling his name, to live a dream most wouldn’t even dare to chase?
Would he trade it all, just to see you again?
His feet move—before he can stop them, despite his thoughts, his heart pulls him stronger toward your section. It's a force beyond his control. When he finally sees you again, it feels like a miracle. You’re still near the barricade, still close enough that he doesn’t have to search.
He keeps up, waves, and makes faces—things for MOAs, things he’s done a thousand times before. But his mind isn’t on them. It’s on you. And you’re just standing there again, frozen in place like you don’t trust yourself to move.
He waves again, but this time, it’s for you. Directly. You tilt your head, hesitant, and then—an unsure wave back. It’s so small, so subtle, but it makes him smile. His grin spreads before he can think twice.
Got you, beautiful.
He pumps his fist in an exaggerated show of triumph, like he just won a game only the two of you are playing. He watches as your eyes go wide, and if the lights weren’t so blinding, he swears he’d see the warmth rising to your cheeks. He fists his hand, trying to hold back from reaching out to you.
He crouches, and the fans around you surge forward, eager to be seen, but you don’t move. And then, he sees it—your eyes kept flickering downward, tracing the thread again and again, like you were making sure.
Yet you see it perfectly too.
You smile—small, hesitant, like you’re not sure this is really happening. Then, as if on impulse, you lift your hand, forming a careful, uncertain hand heart.
He doesn’t even wait a second before returning it.
His eagerness made you laugh. A breathless, disbelieving kind of laugh. He can’t hear it, not over the noise of the crowd, but he sees it in the way your shoulders shake, the way your eyes crease at the corners. His chest aches.
You're even more beautiful when you laugh.
He tosses a few kisses out into the air, but he gives his last kiss, the last one to you. You hesitate for only a second before sending one back. His response is instant—dramatic, ridiculous—clutching his chest like you’ve just shot him straight through the heart. He stumbles back, clutches at his clothes, so completely gone for you.
It’s meant to be a joke, but it isn’t.
Because you do have his heart, don’t you? And the strangest thing is, he doesn’t even know your name. Has never heard your voice. But right now, none of that matters. Maybe he’d stay here forever if he could, but the next song cut through the air, pulling him back to the present. His feet move, leading him away—away from you.
Before he joins the centre, just for a second, he looks back. A second to meet your eyes again, to make sure you're watching him.
And you are.
"Hyung," he breathes out.
Soobin turns, both of them standing still as stylists tug their sweat-drenched shirts off, replacing them with fresh ones.
But Beomgyu isn’t thinking about the show anymore.
He’s looking at Soobin. Waiting. Searching for the right way to ask without anyone else catching on. He doesn’t want them to hear. Doesn’t want them to know.
Not yet.
Soobin frowns slightly. “What? You've been looking distracted since earlier. Are you okay?”
“Your soulmate…” His eyes flicker down. He hesitates, searching for the right words. The right way to say this. "At—Tokyo? How did you…?"
He doesn’t need to finish the thought. How can the older forget the only time he managed to sneak his soulmate backstage? Soobin stares at Beomgyu. The latter's face is practically screaming his questions. How did you do it? How did you get them backstage? How did you make it happen?
Beomgyu has to see you. In front of him. Next to him. Because what if you disappear? What if he lets this slip through his fingers, and suddenly—you’re just gone? And what if this is his only chance?
The room moves around him—zippers, voices, fabric rustling—but all he can hear is his own ragged breathing. He moves his eyes. And there, watching him is their leader who knows him better than anyone—with that equally knowing look on his face.
"Let's talk. Just the two of us."

Beomgyu is your soulmate.
The boys just disappeared backstage, their song still ringing in your ears, but your hands won’t stop shaking. Your chest is tight, your throat burns, and there’s a sting at the corners of your eyes.
You're not a mistake. He’s here. He saw you.
His eyes, his smile. The way he moves, the faint dimple that appears when he does. The thought is too much—it makes your knees weak, and forces you to grip the barricade to keep yourself upright.
"Girl, I swear Beomgyu kept looking over here," Da-hee says, nudging you, completely oblivious to the storm unraveling in your chest. Then she catches sight of your face—at your trembling fingers, at the way you can’t seem to catch your breath.
“Y/N?” Her voice softens. “What’s wrong?”
The words leave your lips before you can even think. "I saw my soulmate."
Your voice shakes, barely above a whisper, but Da-hee hears it. Her eyes go wide. "Wait, what? Oh my god—where is he? Is he a MOA? Is he—”
She doesn’t even get to finish the thought before she freezes.
It clicks.
Then, slowly, her face shifts—from confusion to shock to absolute disbelief. The finding out, then the realising. She stares at you, her mouth slightly open, her hands hovering in the air like she doesn’t know what to do with them.
“Oh my fucking god.” Her hands fly to her mouth, like she needs to physically stop herself from screaming. Then she grabs her hair, like that’s going to help her process this.
“Is he—is Beomgyu—” She cuts herself off, whisper-shouting now, eyes darting toward the stage, toward the place where he just was. “Is that why he kept coming back over here?”
Her grip tightens on your arm, searching your face, waiting for you to confirm what she already knows. But you can’t say anything. All you can give is a small nod.
Minutes pass. The music swells and fades, song after song drifting through the speakers.
Da-hee stays by your side, rubbing soothing circles on your back, whispering reassurances you can’t fully process. At some point, you catch her sniffling into her hands, wiping away her own tears.
Sixteen years.
Sixteen years of friendship, of growing up together, of knowing each other better than anyone else ever could. She’s seen every version of you—the messy, the broken, the parts of you even you struggled to accept. She’s cried with you, cried for you, carried your grief like it was her own. Even after finding her own soulmate, she never left you behind. Never made you feel like you were missing something, like you were less.
And now—now she’s the reason you’re here.
She’s the reason you met him.
You think of every birthday candle she ever closed her eyes for, every whispered wish she made on your behalf—because she believed that if two people wished for the same thing, the universe had to listen.
And maybe she was right.
It doesn’t matter if he never speaks to you. If the lights were too bright, if the crowd was too big, if he never even saw the thread at all.
It doesn’t matter. Because you saw it.
And that means you were never a mistake. Never some error in the grand design.
He exists.
Da-hee squeezes your hands, grounding you as a woman in staff uniform approaches. Her eyes lock onto yours, scanning your face, your outfit—like she’s confirming, making sure. Then, she stops directly in front of you. “We need to check some information on your tickets.”
Your heart slams against your ribs. You’re not stupid. You know what this is. You know they wouldn’t say it outright, not here, not in front of all these people.
“I—I have a friend with me,”
The staff member hesitates, studying you for a beat too long. Then she nods. “She can come with you, but she’ll have to wait in the holding room.”
You turn to Da-hee, and she’s already looking at you, her eyes wide and glassy. For a moment, neither of you speaks. Then she forces a wobbly smile.
Let's go.
You’re going to meet Beomgyu.
The walk was terrifying. Your hands clench tighter with every step, nails digging into your palms, but it does nothing to steady you. Every passing glance burns into your skin—people sneaking curious glances—staff members, crew, people who know exactly why you’re here.
Da-hee had to stay behind in the outer lounge. Now, it’s just you and the staff member leading you deeper into the backstage hallways. The air is thick, suffocating, and you force yourself to breathe through it.
Then she stops. A white door stands in front of you. Dressing Room is printed neatly on a sign, but the words blur as your mind spins.
She knocks. Opens it.
Panic rushes in. What if he doesn’t want this? What if he only let you come here to reject you—to tell you, to your face, that even if the universe says you’re meant to be, he doesn’t want you? What if—
The thought vanishes the second you see him.
Beomgyu.
He’s mid-step, like he’s been pacing. He removes his hands from his face, his eyes widening just slightly before he clears his throat. “Come in,” he says, voice softer than you expected. It’s meant for the staff member, but his gaze never left yours.
The staff steps aside, gesturing for you to enter. Heat crawls up your neck as you force yourself to move, hyper-aware of the way he’s watching every step.
“You have 60 minutes, Beomgyu,” she says before closing the door behind you.
Beomgyu stares at you, and you stare back.
For a moment, neither of you move. Just standing there, eyes locked, as if the world has paused just for this. To anyone else, it might look awkward—but you can't look away as he does.
Your eyes traces over his face, bare and fresh like he just washed up. The soft curve of his cheekbones, the freckles and moles scattered like constellations—proof that the universe took its time with him. Perfect in a way that makes your chest ache.
He blinks, and your eyes catch on his lashes—delicate, dark, fluttering against his skin like something out of a dream.
How can someone be made this perfect?
The question lodges itself in your throat, and before you can stop it, your vision blurs. Tears threaten to spill, but you blink them away. You don’t even know if he wants this yet—
"What’s your name?" Beomgyu asks, his voice quieter than he expected. He watches the way you blink, the slight parting of your lips like you hadn’t expected him to speak first.
His hands curl into fists at his sides. The urge to reach out—to cup your face, to feel your skin—is overwhelming. But he holds himself back.
Beomgyu has never considered himself the kind of person to take the first step. But not this. Not with you. He wants to start a conversation, anything—to get you talking, to hear your voice, to know you.
"Y/N." The sound of your voice stills him. It settles in his chest, not as something new, but as something he swears he’s always known—like a song he’s heard in a dream, waiting to be remembered. His lips twitch into a small, almost dazed smile.
Your voice is so pretty, he thinks. So pretty that it hurts.
He repeats your name, slower this time, rolling it over his tongue like he’s memorizing the way it feels to say it. And when you smile—just the faintest curve of your lips—his own smile widens into a grin.
"So, uh, hi?" Beomgyu says, and it pulls a laugh from you. His heart stumbles over itself at the sound, warmth blooming in his chest. It’s ridiculous, really, how easily you affect him.
"Did you come here alone?" he asks, trying to steady himself.
"I was with a friend," you say, and his eyes flicker—just for a second—to your lips before settling back on yours. "She’s outside."
"Hm." Beomgyu nods slowly, as if letting the thought settle. Then, slowly, he reaches out—his palm open, facing up, an unspoken invitation for you to give your hand out.
Your breath catches. Hesitation flickers for just a moment before you place your hand in his. Beomgyu feels warmth creep up his neck the second your skin meets, a flush he hopes you don’t notice. His fingers curl gently around yours, testing the weight of your hand in his own.
"Come on," he says, his voice softer now. He tugs you forward—careful, gentle, afraid he's hurt you in any way if he pulls too hard. "You should sit. You must be tired from standing out there."
"I could say the same," you murmur as you both sink into the couch. Beomgyu turns slightly toward you, his knee brushing yours, but he doesn’t let go of your hand. His thumb traces absentminded circles against your skin. "You danced and ran around the stage all night," you add, tilting your head at him.
He chuckles, the sound low and a little breathless. Your eyes drift around the room—clothing racks, scattered bags, the quiet remnants of a space that had been buzzing with energy just minutes ago.
"Yeah, I was pretty tired," he admits. Then, after a pause, softer this time, when you look at him again, he’s already staring. "But not anymore."
Beomgyu takes in everything—your lips, the way the light catches in your eyes, the soft of your hand in his. He doesn’t even think before he speaks, before the thought that’s been looping in his head since he first saw you finally slips past his lips.
"God, you're so beautiful."
Beomgyu watches as your cheeks flush, the warmth creeping up your skin like the slow bloom of dawn. He knew—you were his soulmate. Fates stitched together long before this moment, yet nothing could have prepared him for the way you looked right now. He never imagined that watching you blush under his words would feel this intoxicating.
"You’re the one who’s beautiful," you murmur, barely above a whisper. The words feel foreign on your tongue, yet true in a way that unsettles you. You clear your throat, trying to mask the way your heart stumbles over itself, but Beomgyu only tightens his grip on your hand.
You wonder how you even got here. This morning, you woke up with no idea that by evening, you'd be sitting across from your soulmate, flirting like it was the most natural thing in the world.
He chuckles—Beomgyu has heard the word beautiful more times than he can count. It’s been thrown at him in passing, whispered through screams from fans, printed in glossy magazines. But somehow, from your lips, it sounds different.
The next few minutes passed in easy conversation. Beomgyu had already pieced together bits of your life—you were only here because Da-hee dragged you along—he’d been hoping to meet her too, if only to thank her.
He knew you worked a corporate job, that photography was your escape. That you were two years older than him, a fact that he immediately latched onto, whispering noona in a teasing lilt just to see the way you’d roll your eyes laugh and swat his arm. But the truth was, he didn’t want to call you that. It was your name he wanted to say. He felt like he’d already spent a lifetime missing it, and now that he knew it, he never wanted to stop saying it.
You had learned things about him, too. That he’d loved music since he was a kid, that he picked up a guitar before he fully understood its chords. That he was cast as a trainee before he even hit the climax of his teenage years, and that six years had passed since he debuted. Things you could have easily searched online, or you could have read every article, and watched every interview, but nothing made your heart flutter quite like the way he told his own story.
The contrast between your lives was undeniable. Maybe that’s why it took so long for fate to push you toward each other.
While you were drowning in homework, he was in a practice room, chasing a dream. While you sat through lectures and worried about exams, he was in a studio, recording songs that would echo through stadiums. While you cried over a failed job interview, he stayed up until dawn, running through choreography again and again until his legs gave out. Your society—were parallel lines moving in different directions.
But sitting here, watching him scrunch his nose in laughter, none of that seemed to matter. Two people from different worlds, felt like it had faded into one—just by being next to each other.
He hadn’t once let go of your hand for the past hour.
"No, I just—I didn’t know where else to put it, so I stuck it there." You fumble for an excuse, cheeks burning as Beomgyu grins at you. He had spotted the photocard of him tucked into the back of your phone case, and he hadn’t let it go since.
“And it was random,” you add quickly, feeling your face heat up. “You have to randomly pick it.”
The truth is, Beomgyu knows. He knows it was a random selection. He knows you’re flustered. And he loves it. Loves the way you try to explain yourself, loves hearing you ramble, loves the way your face heats up under his stare. And to be honest, if it had been another member’s face staring back at him, no matter how petty it sounded, he also knows he wouldn’t have been too thrilled about it.
He’s in deep.
"Beomgyu, it's time to go." The same staff member says, pulling you both back to reality. You didn't even hear the doors opening. Her eyes flicker to your joined hands for a second, but she doesn’t say anything—just turns and steps outside.
You glance at Beomgyu, and he’s pouting. "We’re flying to Japan tomorrow morning, Y/N."
"Oh." The thought hadn’t even crossed your mind. You just met your soulmate, and by morning, he’d be gone. "Okay."
You stand up, expecting him to do the same, but he doesn’t move. Your hands dangle between you because he still hasn’t let go. "Beomgyu?"
"I’ll see you as soon as I get back, okay?" His voice is softer now, like he’s trying to find the right words. His gaze lingers on you, unreadable for a moment, before he finally stands. He squeezes your hands gently. "It won’t be too long."
"Alright… we have each other's numbers, so… text me."
"Just know your phone might be buzzing non-stop,"
"Got it." You roll your eyes, smiling. "I’ll survive."
"And wear warm clothes—it’s winter."
"You too."
"Eat on time."
"You’re the one doing concerts. I should be the one saying that."
He ignores your deflection, pressing on. "Sleep well. Lock your doors properly. You live alone, so it’s dangerous. Don’t go out too late. And if you do, call me, okay? Actually, I’d prefer if you didn’t go out too late at all. Please—make sure you don’t—"
He doesn’t get to finish. Before he can say another word, you reach up, sliding your arms around the back of his neck, pulling him into a hug. His words cut off instantly, replaced by a soft inhale—like he hadn’t breathed since he started speaking. Your heart squuezes over itself at his endless concern, spreading through your chest. Blinking rapidly, trying to push away the tears threatening to spill.
For the first time tonight, Beomgyu lets go of your hand—only to wrap both arms around you, one firm around your waist, the other reaching up to cradle the back of your head, fingers threading gently through your hair.
"I’ll see you soon, Beomgyu," you murmur.
You feel him tilt his head slightly before pressing a fleeting, warm kiss to your temple. "I’ll see you soon."
Elevators terrify you. It scares you because it feels like everything could come crashing down at any second. Why would you trust something that rises so quickly—too fast?
It can't last, doesn't it?
You feel him snuggle to you more, and you chuckle, pressed against him, his scent, his arms around you, holding you safely—his heartbeat steady beneath your cheek, as if whispering that the fall you fear will never come.
Elevators terrified you.
You wish you could have captured Da-hee’s face when she saw you walking over with Beomgyu beside you, his hand resting firmly on your back. Her eyes widened, mouth slightly agape, before she shot you a knowing look.
Beomgyu offered her a quick thanks, the paper bag with your heels swinging from your hands, and you stood there in the fresh pair of sneakers he’d somehow found in your size—because he wanted to. His eyes met yours for just a second longer before he turned to leave.
The second you stepped into the parking lot, Da-hee lost it. She let out a squeal so loud you had to clamp a hand over her mouth, laughing as she practically vibrated with excitement. "What just happened?!" she whispered against your palm, her eyes sparkling.
That night, as soon as you got home, your phone rang. His name lit up the screen.
It took only a second before answering.
It was awkward at first—neither of you really knowing what to say—but before you knew it, you were talking about everything and nothing, voices laced with exhaustion but neither willing to hang up first. He was leaving in a few hours, and you had to be the one to convince him to sleep, reminding him—more than once—that he had a flight to catch.
You had just curled up in your blankets when your phone buzzed again. Dozy, you reached for it, thumb swiping across the screen.
Choi Beomgyu I’m sorry for making you wait. I promise we’ll make up for all the time we lost. Sleep well, beautiful.
Even as sleep pulled you under, the smile on your lips never faded.

You wake up to the relentless ringing of your doorbell. A groan slips past your lips as you burrow deeper into your blankets. It’s Sunday. No work. No alarms. Just sleep—at least, that was the plan.
The doorbell rings again.
With an exaggerated sigh, you drag yourself out of bed, doing the bare minimum to look somewhat presentable. Your hair is probably a mess, your face still puffy from sleep, but you don’t care. Whoever decided to disturb your well-earned rest better have a damn good reason.
You glance at the clock on your way out. Oh. It’s not even early—it’s almost 1 PM.
Squinting against the bright light as you crack the door open, you’re met with a sight that instantly wakes you up. A delivery man stands there, arms full, holding the biggest bouquet of red roses you’ve ever seen. The sheer number of petals is overwhelming, a deep sea of crimson spilling over the edges of his grasp.
"What—" Your brain struggles to catch up, and then it clicks. Beomgyu. He asked for your address yesterday.
"Y/N?" The man confirms, struggling under the bouquet.
Your eyes widen. "Damn, just how many are in there?"
"Three hundred and fifteen roses," he says, barely holding onto the mass of flowers. "Please sign here."
Three hundred and fifteen. You’re smiling as you take the pen from him.
You stumble slightly, still half-dazed as you carefully set the massive bouquet down, trying not to crush a single petal. Your fingers tremble as you reach for the small card nestled between the roses, your heart already beating a little too fast.
315 months of not being with you. This won’t make up for it, but I hope it makes you happy.
You inhale sharply. Your chest tightens. 315 months. He counted. Beomgyu counted the exact number of months you’ve been alive—how does he even think like this? Tears prick at your eyes before you can stop them. He’s ridiculous. He’s thoughtful in a way that completely undoes you.
Before you even realise what you’re doing, you’re running. Not walking—running. Because suddenly, every second without hearing his voice feels like a second wasted.
Your fingers fumble as you dial his number, pressing the phone to your ear. It barely rings once before the line clicks open—like he had been waiting for this call all along. “Beomgyu—” your voice comes out uneven, breathless.
He chuckles softly, “So… I take it you liked it?”
It’s already 3 PM.
Somehow, you lost track of time, carefully splitting the bundle into smaller arrangements, placing them in vases around your apartment. Now, your living room and kitchen are drenched in the scent of roses—not that you’re complaining.
Beomgyu had stayed on the phone with you the entire time, talking about his morning, his voice in the background as you worked. That is, until someone called for him on the other end, reminding him he had things to do.
You sighed when the call ended. It's sunday, and his sunday is like the worst day of your week. And you're here, resting.
Now, fresh out of the shower, droplets of water still clung to your skin as you stepped onto the cool tile. A shiver ran down your spine as you grabbed a towel, pressing it to your face, inhaling the soft, familiar scent of fabric softener.
Dressed in cozy clothes, you curled up on the couch, remote in one hand, a bowl of yogurt and berries resting on your lap. Television played softly as you mindlessly scrolled through channels, enjoying the quiet.
Until your phone buzzed. You unlocked it, eyes immediately landing on the message.
Nut-job Da-hee. Girl! He's extra glowy today!! OMG <link>
You tapped the link, expecting a video to pop up, but instead, it directed you to download an app. You went along with it, quickly signing in and typing out a cheeky username.
The video loaded—Soobin and Beomgyu, in a hotel room. A small table sat near the camera, cluttered with food containers and drinks. Beomgyu was on the bed, lounging comfortably but still close enough to be part of the frame.
And Da-hee wasn’t exaggerating—he looked good. The black shirt fit him just right, his dark hair falling effortlessly, lips tinted a soft pink. A phone in hand, completely unaware of just how stunning he looked.
An idea sparked in your mind.

"It's not barley tea, MOA," Beomgyu laughs, shaking his head as Soobin insists otherwise. No matter how many times their leader repeats himself, the comments keep flooding in, doubting him.
"Choi Beomgyu really traumatized you, huh?" he teases, eyes crinkling with amusement.
"What do you mean?" Beomgyu argues, but Soobin is already moving on, reading a new comment aloud. "Barley tea is healthy,"
Just then, Beomgyu’s phone buzzes. He glances down at the screen.
My Y/N Live?
His back immediately straightens. Shit. You’re watching? He’s about to type out a response when another message pops up.
You look handsome.
Beomgyu presses a hand over his mouth, feeling the heat rise to his cheeks. He wants to—
"Beomgyu, MOAs are asking what you're doing," Soobin interrupts, his eyes full of silent curiosity.
"Nothing," Beomgyu says too quickly. "Kai sent a meme." He shifts closer to the camera, Soobin right beside him. With his phone in his hands, he types a message, fully aware that Soobin is peeking at his screen. They probably look ridiculous—both of them staring down at their phones while thousands of people watch.
You're watching?
A few seconds pass before your reply pops up.
Yes.
Beomgyu inhales, trying to focus as Soobin keeps talking. His fingers move instinctively.
I'm shy.
Why? You look good.
A pause. Then another message.
Wait, stop looking at your phone. Let MOA see you? Username: 315flowersmyass.
Beomgyu chokes on a laugh. His lips curl up as he locks his phone and holds it up to the camera, as if to prove he’s done. As if to prove that he followed your words.
"So cute," he sings, the words slipping out without thought. The chat erupts, MOAs spamming hearts and messages.
Then he catches it.
315flowersmyass kekekeke -
His grin stretches wider. He closes his face on the screen. "Hi, MOA." He giggles.
This—this is cute. He’s always enjoyed going live, but now he knows you’re watching, he discovers a love for it he never even knew was possible.
The live eventually comes to an end. As soon as it does, Soobin turns to Beomgyu with a knowing smile. "I'm happy you finally found her," he says simply. Beomgyu doesn’t respond right away—just smiles, warmth spreading through his chest. Then his phone buzzes.
He checks it, and the moment he does, a gasp slips past his lips.
It’s a picture. You.
A snack is held near your face, your expression relaxed. You’re in cozy clothes, looking effortlessly beautiful, breathtaking. The picture made Beomgyu wish he could fly back to you right there and then. Over his shoulder, Soobin leans in. "Is that her?" he asks, then grins. "She's pretty."
Beomgyu doesn’t look away from his phone as his lips curl into a smile.
"She is," he murmurs, almost to himself.

"She’s here."
Ji-an’s voice pulls you from your focus. She’s standing beside your desk, phone pressed to her ear, while you scan last week’s finance report. Your eyes flick over the spreadsheet, catching an error in a formula, but before you can fix it, Ji-an calls your name. "Y/N, there’s a delivery for you. They’re at the door."
"Oh," you murmur, pushing your reading glasses up the bridge of your nose. Contacts felt like too much trouble today. "Thanks."
As you stand, a familiar warmth spreads through your chest. Outside, the delivery man hands you a bouquet—this time, white roses.
You peek at the note while walking back, the click of your heels filling the space. Your way back to your desk by the window. The skyline stretches endlessly beyond the glass, a vast expanse of city lights and open sky.
Ow! I fell! Fell for you~ —bg <3
A laugh escapes before you can stop it—he's so silly. One of the things you realised recently.
"That's the fourth bouquet this month, Y/N," Ji-an muses, a teasing smile playing on her lips. "I know you just met your soulmate, but flowers every week? That’s next-level sweet. I’m jealous—mine isn't really a flowers kind of person."
You return her smile, "Yeah, he's the sweetest."
It’s been a month since you met Beomgyu. A single day—that’s all you had together. And yet, in the weeks that followed, he never let distance become an excuse. Even with his tour in full swing, miles stretching endlessly between you, he still found ways to reach you. A call in the middle of the night. A voice note filled with sleepy laughter. And these flowers—his way of saying, I'm here. I'm coming back to you soon.
Ji-an leans against your desk, eyes glinting with curiosity. "So… when do we get to meet him?" she asks, wiggling her brows. "You know the drill—everyone meets everyone’s soulmate. It’s basically tradition. At least one or two quick bond drinks a year, right?"
The playful edge in her voice makes your stomach twist. Because as much as you want to laugh along, to pretend that everything is as simple as it should be… you know the truth.
They can’t meet him. Your friends, your family—none of them can. Maybe not now. Maybe not ever. You don’t even know when you will see him again.
You swallow, forcing down the sudden tightness in your throat. The warmth you felt just moments ago, thinking about him, is now laced with something heavier.
"He's—he's busy," you say, hoping your voice doesn’t betray you. You glance at the bouquet on your desk, fingers tracing the petals as if they hold an answer you don’t have. "Maybe next time."
The day finally ends, and you’re grateful Ji-an didn’t push for more.
You clutch the bouquet a little tighter as you step into the elevator, the faint scent of roses lingering in the air. By the time you make it to the parking lot, exhaustion weighs on you—but then you remember.
You forgot to send a text. Pulling out your phone, you type: I’m heading home now.
The message sends, and a small smile tugs at your lips. Beomgyu is probably fast asleep by now, lost in a time zone opposite yours. He won’t see it for hours, but you text him anyway—because you can already hear his voice in your head, playful and pouty. You forgot to tell me again, he’d whine. Can you please let me know?
You’ve learned a lot from him in such a short time. How simple it is to make someone feel remembered. How easy it is to reach out. How even in the busiest moments, there’s always a second to say, I haven’t forgotten you.
Because that’s what he’s been doing for you all along.
You slip your phone back into your pocket, ready to head to your car when someone stops you. Your steps slow, brows knitting together as your scan lands on a girl—sitting right on the hood of your car.
Your car. She’s perched there like she belongs, fingers idly tracing patterns against the metal.
"Hey," you call out, keeping your voice even. "It’s not really polite to sit on someone else’s car, sweetheart."
Her head lifts, eyes locking onto yours with disdain, "Don't sweetheart me, you slut."
The venom in her words knocks the air from your lungs. Your breath catches, shock flashing through you as she stands. She’s young. Much younger than you.
"Excuse me?"
"Are you fucking deaf?" she snaps.
Your instincts flare—this isn’t normal. You take a step back, "Leave. Now. Before I call the police."
But she doesn’t move. Instead, she tilts her head, and smirked. "You’re Beomgyu’s soulmate, aren’t you?"
Your body locks up. How does she know? Your fingers tighten around the stems of the flowers, the thorns pressing into your palm. You want to speak, to deny, to do something, but the words won’t come.
Because you know—whatever you say next could make this worse.
She clicks her tongue, taking a slow step toward you. "Do this while I’m still being nice," she says, voice eerily light. "Stay away from him. Or I’ll destroy everything." She tilts her head again, a slow blink. "I’d rather see him ruined than with you, unnie."
She steps past you then, her shoulder knocking into yours just hard enough to make you stumble back. Your hands cold, heart hammering against your ribs. She doesn’t look back. Not until she’s a few feet away.
"Don’t think I won’t do it," she murmurs. "Just think about how I knew. Your name. Your workplace. Your parking spot."
She smiles, "Don’t test me."

I’m heading home now.
Beomgyu rubs the sleep from his eyes, his fingers fumbling for his phone the moment he wakes up. Checking for your messages has become second nature—his first instinct, before he even fully shakes off sleep.
The corners of his lips curl into a soft smile as he reads your text. You remembered.
God, he misses you.
When he gets back, he’s not letting you out of his sight. He’ll beg his company if he has to—anything to steal just a little more time with you. He wants to spoil you, to show up with flowers every single day just to see that shy smile of yours. He’d buy you things you didn’t even know you needed, take pictures of you at every chance, make playlists for you, drag you into late-night game sessions just to hear you laugh and call him ridiculous. Love is effort. That’s what his parents always told him. He’d give it—all of it.
Maybe one day, he’d convince you to visit Daegu with him. Introduce you to his family, let his mom fuss over you, watch his brother tease him relentlessly. And Toto… Would you like Toto?
The thought makes him chuckle as he taps your contact and presses call. It rings. Once. Twice. Three times. His smile falters.
Then, voicemail.
His brows knit together. He tries again. Straight to voicemail. The phone feels heavier in his hand now.
It’s the first time you haven’t picked up.
He’s in the van now. It’s been hours.
Beomgyu grips his phone, scrolling through his notifications, eyes darting to every new alert. His heart lifts for a second—only to sink just as fast when he realizes it’s not you. The screen dims in his hands, but he doesn’t put it down. He can’t.
"You still haven’t heard from her?" Soobin asked. He’s the only one still awake, eyes heavy but observant. Beomgyu hadn’t meant to make it obvious, but he’s never been good at hiding things—not to his members.
"No," Beomgyu mutters, shaking his head. His throat feels tight. "We always talk before she falls asleep."
Soobin exhales, tilting his head back against the seat. "She probably crashed as soon as she got home. Long day, maybe?" He keeps his tone easy, reassuring. "Just focus on later's concert. She’ll probably be awake by then."
Beomgyu nods, forcing a small smile. "Yeah. You’re right. Thanks, hyung."
Soobin claps a hand on his back. "Don't think about it too much."
Beomgyu did his best to push thoughts of you aside during the concert. He smiled, he sang, he danced—gave everything to the stage like he always did. But the second he was backstage, drenched in sweat and breathless from the high of performing, his hands were already reaching for his phone.
Still nothing.
Back at the hotel, Soobin and Yeonjun made sure he ate. He forced down a few bites, just enough to keep them from worrying. Now, fresh from a shower, exhaustion settles deep in his bones. His muscles ache, the weight of the night pressing down on him, but sleep won’t come.
His phone sits beside him on the bed. You’re probably asleep. He tells himself that. He should leave it alone.
But knowing doesn’t stop him from pressing call. It rings.
Once. Twice.
He’s about to give up when the line clicks.
“H-Hello?” Beomgyu stutters, his voice unsteady. No response. His heart pounds as he pulls the phone away, checking the screen just to be sure. The call is still connected. “Baby, what’s wrong?”
“Beomgyu.” The way you say his name makes his breath catch.
“Are you okay? I’ve been—”
“Beomgyu.” You cut him off again, your voice softer this time. “Yeah, I’m… okay.” He hears you take a shaky breath. “I’ve just been thinking for the past couple of hours, and…” His grip on the phone tightens.
"What is it?"
“Maybe we should lie low for a bit? You’re busy, and you’re at the peak of your career.” A pause. “It’s not that I’m going away,” you add quickly, “I’m your soulmate, after all.” The last part is barely a whisper.
Beomgyu shoots up from where he’s sitting, running a hand through his hair, fingers pulling at the strands. He feels cold all over. His pulse pounds in his ears.
“Where is this coming from?” His voice is raw, edged dangerously close to panic. “What happened, Y/N?”
“Nothing, really,” you say too quickly. “It just… crossed my mind.” There’s a pause. A beat of silence that feels like a lifetime. “It’s late there. It’s 2 AM. Please sleep.”
His chest tightens. “Are you breaking up with me?” The words feel foreign in his mouth. His voice drops to a whisper. “Do you not want me? Do you not want this?”
“Beomgyu, please.” You voice wavers. “Our fate is certain. But right now… I just feel like it’s not working.” You exhale slowly. “You should sleep, okay? Let’s talk again… soon.”
And then the line goes dead.
Beomgyu stares at his screen, his fingers frozen, his mind racing to process what just happened. His chest caves in, breath shaky as he stumbles back onto the bed. And then—he breaks.
His hands cover his face, shoulders trembling as it all crashes down on him. He had a feeling when you didn't answer his call. A whisper of doubt, an inkling of fear.
And now, it’s real.
4 AM, and Beomgyu still hasn’t slept. His eyes burn from exhaustion, but his mind won’t shut off. He’s been texting you, calling you—over and over—but every attempt goes straight to voicemail. At some point, your phone must have died, or worse, you turned it off.
He lies on the stiff hotel bed, staring at the ceiling. It’s unfamiliar. Cold. But then again, when was the last time anything in his life felt familiar? Felt like home?
His phone dings.
He scrambles for it, heartbeat hammering, but before he can check the notification, an unknown number flashes across the screen. It’s stupid to answer an unknown call at this hour. Their managers had given them talks about it. But something—something in his gut—tells him to pick up.
“Hello?” His voice is hoarse.
“Beomgyu.” A pause. Then— “It’s Da-hee,”
His breath catches.
“She’s going to be angry if she finds out I called you,” Da-hee says, voice hushed, urgent. “But I can’t just sit back and watch this happen. Just listen to me. I’m going to tell you everything—from the start.”
"Please."

"Don’t think I won’t do it," she murmurs. "Just think about how I knew. Your name. Your workplace. Your parking spot."
She smiles, "Don’t test me."
You take another sip of whiskey, curled up on the couch, knees drawn to your chest. The tears won’t stop. No matter how many times you wipe them away, they keep coming, slipping down your cheeks, burning just as much as the liquor sliding down your throat.
Your thoughts won’t stop either.
Beomgyu.
He has everything—his dream, his career, a future so bright it could swallow you whole. He has the world at his feet. And you? You’re just… you. Not worth the risk. Not worth the detour. Maybe this was always how it was supposed to be. Maybe that’s why your paths were never meant to cross in the first place. You saw the consequence, felt it when you passed the Hybe building, that heavy reminder of the impossible divide between your worlds.
It should be enough. Enough that you got to know him, enough that he even knows your name. Enough that you get to see him on a screen. It should be enough.
But is it?
“Fuck,” you choke out, voice breaking. You press the heel of your palm against your eyes, as if that could stop the ache. “Just when I finally saw you… What a joke.” You shake your head, wiping your face with the sleeve of your sweater. “The universe is a fucking idiot for ever thinking we were meant to be.”
You take another drink, and it burns.
“Y/N.”
You blink up, vision swimming, to see Da-hee standing in the doorway, concern etched across her face.
“I’ve been ringing your doorbell,” she says, stepping closer. “I used the spare key—why are you crying?”
You don’t respond. You just stare at her, eyes glassy, cheeks wet. She moves toward you, eyes flickering to the near-empty glass in your hand. You’ve been drinking for hours. You already called in sick to work—there’s no way you could function like this.
"Oh, honey," She sighs, reaches for the glass, and you don’t fight it. You let it go. "What happened?"
“Fate is already taking back what it let me borrow.” Your voice is barely above a whisper, but Da-hee hears it. She your holds your hand.
“What are you talking about?” she asks. “Explain.”
You swallow hard. Your throat feels tight, like every word is fighting to stay buried. But you force them out.
“A sasaeng,” you murmur, watching as Da-hee’s eyes widen in alarm. “She found out about me. She knows everything, Da-hee. Where I live, where I work, my family—everything.” You suck in a shaky breath, blinking back fresh tears. “And the worst of it, she fucking said she’s going to ruin Beomgyu.”
The moment the words leave your lips, your resolve shatters. You cry—like a child finally breaking after being scolded in front of everyone, holding it all in until no one’s around to see. Da-hee pulled you into her arms as you sobbed. You cling to her, hands fisting her sweater. “I have to let him go,” you choke out. “I can’t do this to him. To them. They don’t deserve this.”
Da-hee pulls back, her hands firm on your shoulders. “No,” she says, shaking her head. “You don’t have to do this alone. We can go to the police. We can tell Beomgyu—”
“And then what?” you cut in, voice hollow. “What can they really do? Stop her from telling the world? Keep every single person quiet? Even if she gets caught, the damage will already be done.”
Da-hee doesn’t answer. She just sinks onto the couch beside you, eyes shining with unshed tears, because she knows you well. She knows you too well—knows that the emotional version of you wouldn’t be able to hear her, not right now. Not until the sobs quiet down and the pain in your chest eases just a little. So, she just holds you.
Your phone screen lights up between you. Another call.
Beomgyu. He’s still calling. Still trying.
"I don’t think it’s best to answer it right now—"
But you don’t listen to Da-hee’s warning. Your fingers tremble as they hover over the screen. You have to end this. Now. While you still have the strength. Because deep down, you know—
If you wake up tomorrow, you might not be able to let him go.
“H-Hello?” He stutters on the other line, his voice unsteady. Your breath catches in your throat. “Baby, what’s wrong?”
Everything. Everything is wrong.
“Beomgyu.”
I miss you. How can I go on without you?
“Are you okay? I’ve been—”
“Beomgyu.” You cut him off again, your voice softer this time. “Yeah, I’m… okay.” You take a shaky breath. “I’ve just been thinking for the past couple of hours, and…” You hesitate.
I’m not okay. I’ve been thinking about you, only you, and how my existence could ruin everything you’ve worked for.
"What?" His inhale is sharp, laced with the beginnings of panic.
“Maybe we should lie low for a bit? You’re busy, and you’re at the peak of your career.” You pause, fingers trembling. “It’s not that I’m going away,” you add quickly, desperate to believe your own words. “I’m your soulmate, after all.” The last part is barely a whisper.
I should be replaceable. And I shouldn’t be your priority. You press a hand to your mouth, as if you can keep the words from spilling out—keep the truth from bleeding through.
“Where is this coming from? What happened, Y/N?”
My heart is breaking. And you’re too far away to hold it together.
“Nothing, really,” you say too quickly. “It just… crossed my mind.” You pause, swallowing. “It’s late there. It’s 2 AM. Please sleep.”
Please sleep. And forget about me.
“Are you breaking up with me? Do you not want me? Do you not want this?”
I want you more than anything. That’s why I have to do this. If I can save you from losing everything, I’ll do it. Even if it means losing you.
“Beomgyu, please.” You voice wavers. “Our fate is certain. But right now… I just feel like it’s not working.” You exhale slowly. “You should sleep, okay? Let’s talk again… soon.”
You press the end button.
The sobs rip through you, shaking your whole body and stealing the air from your lungs. You curl in on yourself, pressing your fist to your mouth, as if that could stop the sound, as if that could stop the pain. How can love be this cruel? How can the same thing that made you feel so alive now leave you feeling so hollow?
But this is for him. You tell yourself that over and over, like a mantra, like a prayer, like a desperate attempt to make it hurt less.
You’ll do this for him. Even if it destroys you.
Da-hee wipes at her eyes, sniffling as she looks at you—curled up in the fetal position, your body tense like you’re bracing for impact even in sleep. She managed to get you into bed, but it doesn’t feel like enough.
She’d do anything for you.
Carefully, she tiptoes to the bedside table and picks up your phone. Her heart pounds. If anyone’s watching me, I’ll beg for forgiveness later. But right now, she comes first.
She types in your usual password. 8888. Incorrect. She frowns, thinking. You changed it? Then, almost without realizing it, her fingers move on their own. 0313. The screen unlocks.
Beomgyu’s birthday.
Da-hee lets out a small, disbelieving laugh. “You idiot,” she whispers, shaking her head. “You love him so much, and yet you’re willing to walk away. How can you be this selfless?”
Swallowing the lump in her throat, she scrolls through your contacts, searching for his name. Her thumb hovers over it for only a second before she types his number on her own phone.
You’ll be furious. You might never forgive her. But if there’s even the slightest chance this stops you from making the biggest mistake of your life—she’ll take that risk.
Someone has to tell him the things that you can’t.
The line connects, and Da-hee inhales. “She’s going to be angry if she finds out I called you, but I can’t just sit back and watch this happen. Just listen to me. I’m going to tell you everything—from the start.”
She’ll prepare her apology later—more than that, she hopes Beomgyu will fight for you.

"I want to go home." Beomgyu’s voice is firm, but his hands are clenched into fists at his sides. His manager looks up from his laptop, brows furrowing.
The door bursts open. Soobin stumbles in, slightly out of breath—he must’ve run after him. Beomgyu doesn’t care.
Beomgyu already knows everything—Da-hee told him. Every sickening detail. And now, standing here, he has no idea how to fix this. No idol has ever come out of this unscathed. But none of that matters right now. His only priority is getting to you.
His manager sighs, already exasperated. “You’re flying back home in a few days, Beomgyu.”
“No,” he says, jaw tightening. “I mean now. I need a few days. To rest. To handle something personal.”
“You know your schedule is packed—”
“Then move everything,” Beomgyu interrupts sharply. He feels Soobin’s hand on his shoulder, hears his name spoken softly, but he shrugs it off. No one is stopping him from getting to you.
His manager sighs again, firmer this time. “We can’t do that.”
“You won’t even try?” His voice wavers between frustration and desperation. “You won’t even let the management know?”
“We can’t make last-minute changes like this.”
Beomgyu lets out a bitter laugh, shaking his head. “Right. Of course.” He clenches his fists. All his life, he’s done everything they asked. Pushed through exhaustion, smiled through sickness, showed up even when his body begged him to stop. “I won’t follow you on this,” he says, voice steady. “I can’t do this. Not this time. If you won’t let me go, I’ll still leave.”
“Beomgyu, let’s talk about this when you’re calm,” Soobin says gently, patting Beomgyu’s back. “Please.”
Beomgyu turns to him, his eyes dark with frustration. “I love MOAs, hyung. I love all of you. They gave me everything.” His voice wavers, but he pushes through. “But Y/N… she is my everything.” His breath hitches. He can't even explain it properly. How badly he needs you. “You’re lucky. All of you. Your soulmates—"
“So this is about your soulmate?” The manager exhales sharply, dragging a hand through his hair. “Don’t you see? She’s making you choose between her and your career.”
“No.” Beomgyu’s voice breaks, his chest tightens, and the lump in his throat is unbearable. “She’s not making me choose. She’s already choosing for me.” His next breath is shaky. “She’s leaving. Can you let your own soulmate leave?”
The room falls silent. Soobin watches him, stunned. He’d never seen Beomgyu like this before—this angry, this desperate. And the question stings the older.
Beomgyu turns away, blinking rapidly, trying to keep the tears at bay. Explaining further is useless. He’s already said everything that matters. Nothing is going to stop him now. When he steps into the hallway, he sees Yeonjun standing there, leaning against the wall.
He’s been listening the whole time.
Yeonjun immediately reaches out, tugging at his arm. “Yah, Choi Beomgyu, come on,” he says quietly. “Let’s talk with everyone.” Beomgyu exhales shakily. If there's anyone he owes an explanation. It's them. His brothers.
So Beomgyu told them everything.
About the sasaeng. About the threats. About how you were walking away to protect him. About how he refused to let that happen. And just like he knew they would, the four of them listened—not as bandmates, not as colleagues, but as brothers.
No one understood him better than they did.
They didn’t tell him to reconsider. They didn’t tell him to stay. Instead, they held onto him, arms wrapped tight, as if they could shield him from the storm that was already brewing. They prayed—not for him to change his mind, but for the world to understand.
Kai was the first to break. His voice barely above a whisper, “Is it really worth it… if the world doesn’t want us to have soulmates?”
It shattered something in all of them.
Beomgyu didn’t answer—not with words. Because what kind of world was it, where love had to be hidden? Where choosing your own heart felt like a betrayal?
With the help of his members, he managed to slip through the cracks, securing a last-minute flight. Now, as he sat on the plane, adjusting his mask, pulling his cap low, he caught his own reflection in the window.
Maybe it was time. Time to stop pretending. Time to stop hiding.
Because an idol in love isn’t supposed to be shameful. Because having a soulmate shouldn’t be treated like a scandal. Because loving you would never make him love his dream any less.
He just had to believe in MOAs. In the people who gave him everything. What he has with them, he treasures so much that the thought of baring his heart isn’t impossible.
And he would.
Completely.
He would trade it all, just to see you again.

The pounding in your head hasn’t let up, a dull, relentless throb that even the hot shower couldn’t wash away. You pop an aspirin, sighing as you press your fingertips against your temples, willing the ache—and everything else—to disappear.
Then the doorbell rings. Right. The food.
Dragging your feet toward the door, you barely think as you swing it open—then freeze.
Choi Beomgyu.
His face bare, a backpack slung over his shoulder. A car idles in your driveway, but you barely process it. Your eyes lock onto the messy strands of blonde peeking out from under his hoodie, his gaze searching yours. He looks at you like he’s afraid you’ll vanish if he blinks.
“Y/N—” The door slams shut in his face before he can say another word.
Your breath stumbles. Your pulse pounds. The damp strands of your hair cling to your neck as you press your back against the door, fingers gripping the handle like it’s the only thing keeping you upright. Shit. He fucking looks good with his new dyed hair— wait. Don't think about that. What is he doing here?
“I’m parked out front,” his voice comes through the door, muffled but you hear it. “I just want to talk.” A shaky inhale. Then softer, “Baby, I’m here. When you’re ready, just open the door.”
His footsteps retreat.
You start pacing, your heart ricocheting against your ribs. He’s here. He came all this way. After everything you stupidly said. You hurt him yet—
The doorbell rings again.
You yank it open, “Wait, my ass—”
“Chinese takeout for Y/N?” The delivery guy blinks at you, holding up the bag.
“Oh.” You blush, embarrassed. You fumble for your wallet, signing the receipt with shaky hands. Your eyes keep drifting past him, toward the car still parked in front of your house.
Just like what he said. He's there.
The hours slip away unnoticed, morning fading seamlessly into afternoon. Every time you steal a glance through the curtain, he’s still there. Evening creeps in as you start making dinner. Without thinking, you plate portions for two. Your hands hesitate over the dishes, your heart heavy. When you check the clock, it’s 8 p.m. He’s been outside for twelve hours—silent, waiting.
Just like he promised. He never knocked again. Twelve hours. Your hands tremble as you turn off the stove. He must’ve just come from another gruelling day, looking like he’d stepped off a plane after hours in the air—rumpled, drained, and still without rest.
Why did you let him wait this long?
You don’t stop to think anymore. You grab your keys, shove your feet into your slippers, and head straight for his car, blinking back the tears that blur your vision.
He must see you coming because, before you even reach him, the car door swings open.
And there he is.
His hoodie is pushed back now, his hair slightly dishevelled like he’s run his hands through it a hundred times. His face is drawn, exhausted. His eyes—red-rimmed, heavy, like he’s been crying for hours. You swallow the lump in your throat.
“Come inside,” Your voice cracks, but you don’t stop. You just turn around and head back toward the door. You don’t have to look back to know he’s following.
He steps inside, his tall frame filling the space as you quietly shut the door behind him. Your apartment looks small with him around. When you turn, your eyes meet, "Beomgyu—"
You barely get his name out before he’s on you. He can't stop himself anymore. It’s how you looked outside, so effortless—your hair pinned up, the simplicity of your everyday clothes, and yet, you somehow seemed untouchable. He envisions a life with you, a routine, your soft smile waiting for him when he comes home, you looking like something angelic—his hands grip your waist, pulling you flush against him, his body heat searing through your clothes. His lips crash into yours—hungry, desperate, like he’s been starved for you. His mouth moves against yours, claiming, taking.
His fingers thread through your hair, tilting your head back as his tongue slides against yours. His hands roam down, gripping, pulling, making sure you feel every bit of him. He grabs your wrists, lifting them, wrapping your arms around his neck as his lips move to your jaw, then to your neck, his breath ragged as he nips your sensitive skin. "I missed you," he murmurs. Another kiss—hotter, deeper, his body pressing your back against the wall. "I got fucking scared you'd never open the door."
His movements were hurried, frantic, as if he were afraid you’d disappear if he let go. In one swift motion, he lifted you, his steps unsteady as he carried you to the bedroom. Your bedroom. The air felt heavy as he laid you down on the mattress.
"I get it. I know you don’t mean it—that you really believe this is for the best." His voice softens, almost breaking. He presses his crotch to yours, eyes seeking yours. "But did it ever cross your mind what I want? What I think is best for me? For us?"
“I'm sorry,” you said weakly, your hands clutching at his shirt, your voice trembling as much as your resolve.
"I'll always forgive you." His hands moved to your shoulders, then slid down to your waist, pulling you to him. He grinds desperately to you. You never knew that lips could talk without uttering a word as he captures your lips again and again. "Because your words could never hurt me as much as your leaving does."
You surrendered to his touch, your body softening beneath him. Your hands gripped his shoulders for balance as he pressed you deeper into the mattress, which groaned under your shifting weight. You reached for Beomgyu’s lips, catching him off guard as you kissed him with everything you had, tongues colliding in a heated frenzy. His hand slid between your thighs, cupping your middle and sending a shiver through you. But even in the haze of his taste, a heavy guilt settled in your chest. "Gyu,"
"I need you, baby. Or I'll go crazy." His breaths were ragged, syncing with your every moan as his tongue tangled with yours. Your fingers tugged at the hem of his shirt, pulling him closer, urging him on. His body pressed against yours, grinding to yours, while his hands roamed over your skin, igniting every nerve he touched. His lips trailed downward, leaving soft kisses that melted into your flesh, a path leading straight to your core.
He stripped you of every barrier, leaving you bare under his gaze. His eyes shimmered with adoration and awe as they traced your body. You hadn’t realized how powerless you were against him until your legs parted, welcoming him. He's on top of you, looked at you like you were sacred, like you were his entire world.
Beomgyu's eyes never left yours as his fingers found your hand, seeking the place where the string was tied. The red thread appears, and he lifts it to his lips. A kiss—featherlight, reverent—pressed against the place where destiny tied you to him.
“It's going to be okay…” he whispered between kisses, his voice breaking in a way that made your heart ache. Tears pricked your eyes because you wanted to believe him. You needed to believe him. His hands explored further, his fingers shakily reaching for your clit, pinching softly then roughly rubbing, coaxing sounds from your lips that you didn’t know you were capable of.
"I'll fix it for us, for you." He looks at you—wanting to see every expression you make. He’s going to fuck you until you cum all over his dick and then he’ll do it again. Until you won't be able to think about leaving him anymore. He goes down further—kisses down and the smell of you is divine.
His face hovers and with his fingers he spreads you apart. He swallows—salivating. He sticks his tongue out, lightly licking your clit. You taste so—He buries his face in, tongue inside, hands on your hips. "Shit, you were really gonna leave me? And I was gonna miss this?" He groans, lapping up, sucking the arousal out of you. He moves up, nose bumping on your clit then he suckles more. His cock throbs with every taste of you, the way you melt against his mouth driving him insane. He feels you slick against his chin, but he doesn’t stop—doesn’t leave a single inch of you untouched by his warm, greedy mouth. It was as if your body had been crafted for his lips alone, flesh and heat meant to be devoured at his leisure.
When you tug hard on his hair, he groans against you, finally pulling back. His lips glisten as he moves up your body. He crashes his mouth onto yours, the kiss deep and hungry, and you taste yourself on his tongue—messy, desperate, a mix of him and you, blurring the lines between who’s devouring who.
“I love you,” he murmured as he positioned himself, slowly sliding into you. A low, guttural sound escaped him as he felt you, tight and warm, pulling him deeper. He's sure he'll come right there and then. His face buried itself in the curve of your neck, and his words spilled out—"I'm sorry it took this long."
"You feel so so good, don't ask me to stop, please." His touch was gentle even as his thrusts inside you grew more desperate. He cradled your head, kissed away your tears, and pressed his lips to your cheek. “I’m in love with you, Y/N,"
“I love you,” you replied, capturing his lips in a desperate kiss as you both unravelled together, bodies trembling in unison. Your thighs clenched tightly around his waist.
"Beomgyu, I— It was selfish of me—" You whispered his name and it made tears well up in his eyes. His hand gently pushed the damp strands of hair from your face, and he pressed tender kisses along your cheeks, your temple, and your jaw.
“Shh, no,” he whispered, pulling you against his chest, holding you like he was afraid you’d slip away. His lips brushed the crown of your head. "None of this is your fault," he murmurs. "But you have to trust me now."
All the horrors inside you dissolve with every kiss he presses to your skin, each one stripping away the fear, the doubt, the self-imposed distance. He kisses you like he’s rewriting everything, like he knows exactly where every shattered piece of you belongs. As if he’s memorized the map of your ruin and decided, you were always meant to be whole.
And you let him.
Because now, in his arms, with his lips claiming yours over and over, only pulls away when breathing becomes a necessity—his forehead pressing against yours for a fleeting second before his mouth finds yours again, as if letting go for too long might break him, you realise the truth—it was foolish of you to think that pushing him away would solve it all.
It was foolish to ever believe you could ever live without him.
Waking up with Beomgyu’s arm draped over your bare waist felt like something out of a dream.
The second you tried to slip away, he pulled you right back in, burying his face in the crook of your neck with a sleepy rough hum. His grip was loose but unwilling, like even in sleep, he couldn’t bear to let you go. He filled your morning with lazy kisses, tangled limbs, and muffled laughter, his fingers tracing over your bare skin.
You could live a lifetime like this and still never believe it was real.
Now, you sit at your vanity, dressed for work, fastening an earring as Beomgyu, fresh from the shower, tugs on a clean hoodie. He catches your eye in the mirror and grins as he walks over. “What are you doing baby? Dolled up and all.”
“Drying my hair,” you say, “I’m actually early today. Da-hee is dropping by later too, by the way.”
“Okay. I’ll drive you.” He leans down, eyes flickering to the hairdryer on the desk. He picks it up, flipping it on. “I know how to do this.”
You give him a skeptical look. “Oh, really?”
“Uh-huh. I could probably do your makeup too.” He presses a teasing kiss to your cheek, making you giggle.
The warmth of the dryer was against your scalp as he carefully runs his fingers through your hair, drying it with surprising patience. His touch lingers even after the dryer clicks off, his fingers gently gathering strands of your hair.
“I used to braid my mom’s hair when I was younger,” he murmurs. “I want to do yours too.” You nod, watching him through the mirror, watching the way he looks at you with so much quiet devotion it nearly steals your breath. "It will be an honour to do this every day for you, you know."
And just like that, you fall in love all over again.
You sit in the passenger seat, your hair loosely braided—the proof that he wasn’t just bluffing. His fingers lace with yours as he drives, his thumb idly tracing circles against your skin. Every time the car slows at a red light, he lifts your hand to his lips, pressing a soft kiss to your knuckles. “I love you,”
He grins, that same cheeky, heart-stopping smile. "Love you more," he replies.
You let out a quiet breath, leaning your head against the window, watching the world blur past. But then—out of the corner of your eye—you see it.
And your breath catches in your throat.
Rain Lilies.
Flowers that shine the brightest in the wake of the storm.
It looks out of place. You remembered last night’s rain. It had come down in furious sheets, drowning the streets, washing everything away. The pavement is still slick, puddles reflecting the grey morning sky. And yet—there it is.
Small. Alive.
In the middle of a city that never stops, where people rush past without a second glance, too busy to care about a thing so insignificant, so easily overlooked—it stands, untouched. A quiet defiance against the cruelty that tried to take it.
It looks out of place, and it's beautiful.
If something this fragile can survive and still bloom—maybe, just maybe, so can you.

"Hyung!" Beomgyu’s laughter rings through the air as he runs straight into his brother’s arms. They embrace, laughing like they’re kids again, the older one attempting to lift him off the ground. Behind them, his parents rush to catch up, smiles stretched wide across their faces. The house, with its endless stretch of green, looks like out of a memory—soft, a paradise.
Beomgyu turns to you then, his hand resting gently on your back. His eyes soft when he speaks.
"Mom, Dad," he says, "This is Y/N."
You bow politely, but before you can even rise fully, his mother pulls you into a hug. "I’ve wanted to meet you for so long, dear," she murmurs against your shoulder.
When Beomgyu’s father steps forward, you feel your chest tighten. He smiles, and for a second, it’s like looking at Beomgyu in the years to come. His hug is just as warm, just as safe.
Lunch is a blur of laughter and stories, of hands brushing, of Beomgyu sneaking glances at you when he thinks you aren’t looking.
His parents laugh along with your stories—the one about meeting his sweet members, and how Da-hee had begged to meet them in person. You describe her pale face, wide-eyed and on the verge of fainting the entire time, and how Beomgyu grew irritated every time Yeonjun jokingly flirted with you, insisting he should be your favorite.
But it’s the story of Beomgyu meeting your family last week that really gets them, how he’d been so polite, yet adorably nervous, his hands fidgeting in his lap as he tried to make the right impression.
His mom grins, her eyes bright with excitement. “I’ll have to meet them soon,” she says, already making plans in her head, as if you’ve always been part of the family. At some point, Beomgyu tells them you’ll be staying for the week. They are overjoyed, and Toto, takes an instant liking to you.
Beomgyu sits on the porch, it's evening now.
This deck—he’s spent years here—on this very step, staring out at the world, wondering when he’d find you. Wondering if he ever would.
His fingers tighten around the handwritten letter on his phone screen, the words waiting to be sent out into the world. His heart pounds. What if they don’t understand? What if this changes everything? What if—
Laughter drifts from inside the house, yours mixing with his mom’s, his brother’s. It was the only assurance he'd ever need.
He exhales sharply, thumb hovering for only a second longer before he clicks post. It loads. He doesn’t watch. Just locks his phone and sets it aside as the front door creaks open.
"You’re trying to escape me, cookie?" Your voice is playful, arms crossing as you step toward him. Beomgyu only grins, shaking his head at the nickname his father gave him. He slips an arm around your shoulders as soon as you sit down, pulling you while he presses kisses on the side of your head.
"Never," His fingers find yours, a new habit of his—thumb caressing over your ring finger. His thoughts slip to the diamond ring hidden in his dorm, the one he bought after a week of meeting you. He just needs to find the right moment, the right words. Because even now, after everything, you still make him nervous. The way his heart races when you walk into a room, how everything seems to stop for a moment when you look his way.
He meets your smile with one of his own. Would he ever be this lucky in another life? To find you, to love you—not by destiny’s design, not by some divine script, but by choice?
Even without a soulmate mark, even without fate—
It would always be you.
Maybe in another world, the sky is burning, the world is ending, an apocalypse, and he still falls in love with you. Maybe in another life, he is a man undone, a husband who shatters more than he mends, but even then, he would spend eternity piecing himself back together just to be worthy of you.
Beomgyu knows this much: no matter the lifetime, no matter the universe, he will love you. Again and again, without hesitation, without end. As if loving you is written into the very fabric of his existence.
His fingers graze your cheek, and you lean into him like you were always meant to—like the universe has been bringing you back to him for centuries. Your smile reaches your eyes, soft and certain. His missing piece. The better half of him.
Beomgyu looks at you, and to him, you are something that comes after the rain—the hush of the earth reborn, the golden light breaking through the clouds, the promise that even the chaos was worth it.
He can’t help himself. Not when you’re looking at him like that. Not when your smile is the only thing he ever wants to see.
So he leans in.
The phone sits forgotten, lighting up with messages—teary words, heartfelt congratulations, the world calling for him. But none of it matters.
Because right now, you are in his arms. Right now, he is kissing the soft of your addicting lips. And right now, that is all that ever was, all that ever is, all that ever will be.
THE END.

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