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b3ach-bunn7 · 27 days

Text

WE SUFFOCATED OUR LOVE

a random number starts texting you and you decide to text back

Or, the bassist of your favourite band accidentally messages you and u fall in love

inspired by this fic 😆 and my fav band the driver era

band!au, no quirks, text form, eventual romance

————————————————————————-

September 18th

10:37 pm

Unknown: Ask Shiggy to grab me a monster on his way back

You: a monster?? are u 12…

Unknown: Shut up and ask

You: sorry I think you have the wrong number

Unknown: No I don’t

You: lowkey u do..

You: r u trying to hack me

Unknown: You’re still texting me so u would probably fall for it

You: okay ur still textjng me genius

Unknown: Texting*

You: Shut up.

You: okay don’t actually shut up

Unknown: Thought I was a hacker

You: maybe I wanna be hacked

Unknown: Is this flirting

You: maybe

You: r u really sexy

Unknown: Extremely

You: 😍 feeling bashful rn

You: why r u drinking monsters anyways

You: Wait am i actually messaging a 12 yr old

September 19th

4:03 am

Unknown: I’m not 12 years old

Unknown: I’m 24

Unknown: And i drink monsters for energy

Unknown: And because they r yummy

Unknown: And cheap

You: omfg you don’t need a separate text for every word

Unknown: Oh

Unknown: Didn’t think you’d be awake so late

You: well I wasn’t but SOMEONE is messaging me at 4am

You: also I’m 24 2

Unknown: Didn’t ask

You: kys

Unknown: Ok bye

You: pussy

You: why are u even awake so late

Unknown: I’m writing

You: omg 😳 are u an author

Unknown: Lol no

Unknown: I write music

You: OMG

You: even better

You: what do u play

Unknown: Bass

Unknown: And I sing kinda

You: kinda?

Unknown: I sing backup mainly

Unknown: Or lead if I’m feeling extra generous

You: generous?

Unknown: To please all my loving woman fans ofc 😫

You: EWW TF

You: DONT EVER USE EMOJIS AGAIN BRUH 😭

Unknown: 😭💔.

You: literally throwing up alllllxover my room

Unknown: Weirdo

Unknown: Go to sleep

You: don’t tell me what to do 🙄

Unknown: Okay don’t sleep

You: lowkey have to I have uni tomorrow

Unknown: Loser

You: shush

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

September 19th

8:47 am

You: FUCK YOU

September 19th

2:30 pm

Unknown: Meanie 😢

You: i overslept because of you

Unknown: Were you up all night thinking about me

You: i dont eben know ur name

Unknown: Dabi

You: oh ur sooooo emo and edgy

Dabi: Shut up

You: nobody... understands you😕⛓️🥀

Dabi: You gonna tell me ur name or what

You: Y/N

Dabi: Pretty name

You: dont stalk me plz

Dabi: No promises

————————————————————————

September 28th

10:02 pm

You: so if u dont go uni what do you do

Dabi: I told you i write music

Dabi: Am also in a band

You: wait are u like

You: successful

You: like do u make money from it

Dabi: Well yes

Dabi: Its my job

You: wait thats kinda cool

Dabi: 😎

You: take it back so fast

You: do u stream ur music on like spotify

You: let me listen

You: whats ur band called

Dabi: No

You: mid name but i will look it up

Dabi: I dont wanna tell you

Dabi: Not right now at least

You: r u like super famous

You: am i messaging harry styles rn

Dabi: Im sorry i kept this from u for so long

You: is 1D cming back

You: plz

Dabi: Never

Dabi: Narry ruined us😔

You: HAHAH

You: HWO DO U KNOW WHAT TAHT IS

Dabi: I have a sister

Dabi: But seriously I'll tell you one day

You: how do ik ur not lying about ur music 🤔

Dabi: [image attachment]

September 28th

10:13pm

You: MINABHABHAE

You: LOOK

You: OMFG

You: [image attachment]

You: HIS HAND IS ALL TATTED UP AND SEXY

You: AND THAT BASS

You: just creamed my pants

Mina: GIRL

Mina: you dont even know what he looks like

Mina: he does have sexy hands tho

You: sexy hands = sexy face

You: its litch science

Mina: ur so whipped and its been a week

You: uhm

You: ten days actually

Mina: ur not right in the head

September 28th

10:22 pm

Dabi: Did my incredible bass shock u to silence

You: i literally collapsed when i saw it

You: i like the blue

You: also ur tattoos are cool

Dabi: Thanks babe

You: mhm

You: yh

You: did they hurt

You: when u got them done

Dabi: Nah they werent too bad

Dabi: Worst was probs the ones on my chest

You: r u like alll tatted up

Dabi: I am

Dabi: That okay?

You: mhm

You: very cool

You: i want a tatto but im lowkey scared like

You: what if it hurts

Dabi: Ill get one with you

Dabi: Ill talk you through it

Dabi: Distract you from the pain

You: mhm

You: yes

You: very good

You: my roomates calling me ttylxox

September 28th

10:30pm

You: [screenshot]

You: hes SOO FLIRTING RIGHT

Mina: oh babe this reads like a porno

You: DFHBAJHF

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

October 11th

8:37 pm

You: [link attachment]

You: listen to this song

You: LOV is the best band eva

Dabi: LOL

You: WHAT

You: its so good its my fav band

You: im seeing them next month

Dabi: Really

You: r u jelly

Dabi: Very

Dabi: If only i could be there

You: i think theres still tickets for sale if u acc wanna come

Dabi: You tryna see me in person?

You: mayhaps

You: ur just so mysterious

You: what if ur actually like a pedo

Dabi: The fuck

Dabi: I’m no pedo

You: okay cool

You: you can come to the concert then

Dabi: Seriously?

October 11th

8:47pm

You: MINA

You: PLEASE

You: [screenshot attachment]

You: SHALL I SAY YEA

Mina: UHM

Mina: YES

Mina: concerts are public so if he’s actually a creep you’ll be safe

You: OKAY

October 11th

8:50pm

You: okay omg

You: shall we actually do this

Dabi: Yeah

Dabi: You got another month to figure out if I’m a pedo

You: now I deffo think you’re one

—————————————————————————

October 17th

6:45 pm

Dabi: Does this sound good

Dabi: [audio message]

You: WOAH

You: that sounds really good

You: is that u talking at the end

Dabi: Yeah my roommate walked in

You: ur voice is so deep

Dabi: Sexy right

You: gosh so modest too

Dabi: I’m working on a new song but I can’t tell if I like that riff

You: u should like it

You: it’s very good

Dabi: Thanks babe

You: soooooo

You: can u show me ur band now 😁

Dabi: No 😁

You: 🤬

—————————————————————————

October 21st

8:33pm

You: what would u do if we meet irl and IM actually famous

You: like u pull up to the concert and I’m there but I’m actually like Jojo siwa or something

Dabi: I’d be a bit disappointed

You: u don’t fw jojo??

Dabi: No but she’s gay and I’d hope all my flirting was being put to good use here

You: hardee har

————————————————————————

October 25th

6:45pm

You: I’m supposed to be studying but

You: I can’t stop thinking if halloweeen😝

Dabi: You going trick or treating?

You: i wish

You: unfortunately too old for that now

Dabi: Loser

Dabi: My little brothers 11 so I get to do it with him

Dabi: But I gotta act cool like I don’t wanna do it

You: IM SO JELLY

You: can I borrow ur little brother on the 31st of October plz

Dabi: No weirdo

You: sigh

You: I’m going to a party at least

Dabi: Oh yeah

Dabi: What are u dressing up as

You: me and my friend are going as monster high girls 😁😁😁

You: shes draculaura and I’m clawdeen 😜

Dabi: Sick

Dabi: U have to show me when you do it

You: gosh ur so obsessed with me

You: but okay

—————————————————————————

October 28th

7:00pm

You: [image attachment]

You: the fit is ready

Dabi: Why aren’t u wearing it

You: im gonnna do the full reveal ON halloween

Dabi: Sigh fine

You: what are you wearing punk

Dabi: Punk 😭

You: LOL

Dabi: U can’t laugh

You: okay…

Dabi: You know that show curious George

You: HAHAHA

You: R U FONNA BE THE YELLOW HAT MAN

Dabi: You said u wouldn’t laugh 😔

You: NO ITS SO CUTE

Dabi: I got him a little monkey onesie

You: AWWW

You: THATS SO CUTE

October 28th

7:10 pm

You: [screenshot attachment]

You: when he’s a good older brother 😍😍❤️😝

Mina: okay bare minimum 😍😍😍

You: SHUT UP

—————————————————————————-

October 31st

6:00 pm

Dabi: [image attachment]

Dabi: Ur favourite childhood father figure

You: OMG

You: U GUYS LOOK SO GOOD

You: crazy how ur face is covered🙄

Dabi: You love the thrill of the mystery

Dabi: Let’s see ur costume

You: my party starts at like nine bruh 😭

You: im in bed watching movies

Dabi: Loser

Dabi: Imagine not trick or treating

You: u suck so much

Dabi: Ofc I do 😋

You: VOMIT 🤢

October 31st

6:07pm

You: [image attachment]

You: Mina.

You: look at his ARMS IN THAT SUIT

Mina: it’s bright yellow

You: HES CURIOUS GEORGE MAN

You: his little brothers the monkey

Mina: WAIT WHY IS THAT KINDA CUTE

You: IK

Mina: and he does look sexy in that button up

You: the tattoos🤤

Mina: love a man with a dark past 😍

You: god im so scared to see him

You: the concerts on the 10th

Mina: you’ll be okay babe Dw

October 31st

8:30pm

You: [image attachment]

You: it’s…. A full moon.. I feel myself… changing 🐺

Dabi: Woah

Dabi: You look hot

You: omg

You: thank u

Dabi: You’re pretty too

Dabi: R u wearing that to the concert

You: LOL NO

You: I haven’t decided yet

Dabi: U have to show me

Dabi: So I can find you

You: and how am I gonna find you

Dabi: You’ll find me

November 3rd

7:02pm

Dabi: [audio attachment]

Dabi: Listen please 😄

Dabi: What do you think

You: why r u acc good at this

You: I LOVE

You: yk it kinda sounds like LOV

You: I think you’ll like their music

Dabi: Girl I listen to them

You: GIRL???

You: sassy man apocalypse is alive and well

Dabi: Whos ur favourite band member

You: hmmmm

You: I like the drummer

You: himiko she’s so cute

You: but the bassist 🤤🤤🤤

You: Touya

You: need him in ways I can’t articulate over message 😳

You: uhm where did u go

You: did my thirsting freak u out

Dabi: No ur good

Dabi: I thought you’d like the guitarist

Dabi: Shiggy

Dabi: Every girl is obsessed with him

You: yeah but Touya is all emo kinda

You: I love it

November 8th

9:00pm

You: [image attachment]

You: fit check for the concert😜

Dabi: I love it

Dabi: Very Blue

Dabi: That’s my fav colour

You: that’s why I’m wearing it??

Dabi: Blushing rn 🤭

You: HAHA

November 10th

6:30 pm

You: On my way! now

You: tf

Dabi: Can’t wait to see you!

You: LOL SHUSH

You: im nervous

Dabi: Don’t be

Dabi: Im excited to see you

You: me too 😆

November 10th

6:50pm

Mina: be careful plz

Mina: there’s loads of people around but still

Mina: he could be a freak in disguise

You: I know babe Dw dw

You: I’ll keep u updated

Mina: good

Mina: r u gonna give him a biggggg fat smooch 🤤

You: SHUT UP

November 7th

7:00pm

You: are you here?

Dabi: Yeah

You: omg

You: im scared

Dabi: Lowkey same

Dabi: But im so manly and strong so im actually not scared

You: LOL

Dabi: Okay wait

Dabi: I need to tell you smth

You: is this u telling me the pedo allegations r true….

Dabi: Before we meet u need to know

You: yeah what’s up?

Dabi: Idk how to say this without u thinking I’m lying but

Dabi: I’m Touya

You: uh

You: what 😅

Dabi: I just didn’t wanna tell you because I thought you might like

Dabi: Idk people r so weird about it when they find out

Dabi: And I didn’t want you to just talk to me because of that

Dabi: Especially when I found out u listen to our music

Dabi: I’m sorry I never told u

Dabi: Y/N? You there?

You: yeah I just

You: slightly confused

You: idk how to tell if ur lying or not

Dabi: [image attachment]

Dabi: Theres the face reveal you’ve been after

You: what the sigma

You: okay

You: woah

You: so I’ve actually been dming a celebrity

Dabi: You prefer me or Harry styles

You: you deffo

You: but I think you knew that from my messages from before

Dabi: Yeah i remember

Dabi: Dw you can articulate all the ways you need me after the show

You: haahahahhahaha

You: 😁😁😁 okay

Dabi: I have smth for you though

You: you do?

Dabi: Yeah

Dabi: Go to the back door where that scary security guy is

Dabi: His name is Spinner

Dabi: Tell him Dabi sent you

You: OKAY

You: :((( THIS IS SO CUTE

Dabi: You like them?

You: I can’t believe u got me flowers 😢

You: thank you!!!

Dabi: That’s alright

Dabi: Okay I need to go warm up

Dabi: I’ll be looking for you in the crowd

You: I’ll be staring at you too

Dabi: I said looking

You: same diff

You: wait hold on

Touya: What?

You: nm nm

You: good luck for ur show 😆

Touya: Thanks babe

BONUS

November 7th

5:05pm

Touya: Toga

Touya: TOGAAAAA

Toga: WTF DO U WANT

Touya: If I was gonna get a girl flowers what should I get her

Toga: GASP GASP

Toga: WHO R U RIZZING UP

Touya: Literally fuck off never say that

Toga: is this that girl you’re always messaging

Toga: and smiling at ur phone 🥺🥺

Touya: Fuck off

Toga: IT ISSSSSS

Toga: IS SHE COMING TONIGHT

Touya: Yes

Toga: AHHSSHAHWHW

Toga: THIS IS SO EXCITING

Touya: I’m so happy ur having so so much fun

Toga: I so ammmmmm

Toga: but why don’t u ask her what she wants

Touya: It’s a surprise idiot

Toga: AWWWWWWWW

Toga: okay well if u wanna be so really romantic u could get her roses

Toga: or maybeee tulips or lillies

Toga: she’ll like whatevs u get her

Touya: Okay

Touya: Thanks

Toga: that’s okay lover boy 😍🥰

Touya: Kys

—————————————————————————-

THIS WAS SO FUN TO WRITE OH EM GEE but it lowkey took longer than I thought it would… but i hope u all enjoyed 😁😁

also y/ns messaging is literally just how I message.. I fear this is the most self indulgent fic I’ve ever written

#oneshot #fluff #dabi/reader #touya todoroki x reader #dabi x reader #bnha touya #bnha dabi #league of villains #toga himiko #toga himiko x reader #band au #b3ach bunn7 #touya todoroki #mha dabi #dabi todoroki #dabi

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honey-milk-depresso · 8 months

Note

Batboys x reader who is a game/singer streamer

So I'm assuming that s/o is a singer + game streamer from what I can see soooo yeah! I think I went to focus on the gamer part than singer though. Also I could only do this for Dick, Jason and Tim because 😭 sorry ;-;;;

TT o TT

Batboys with a game (mostly) + singer s/o

Dick Grayson

Don’t even get me started on how hype Dick’s gonna be. You game??? And stream?????? Epic-

Dick has played video games with Tim before it’s just that he sucks at playing the modern one sometimes-, so he probably wants to do co-ops with you and maybe join your streams and play with you.

He sucks ASS though in Among Us because he’s bad at lying when he’s imposter and too trusting when he’s just a crew mate. He’s so funny though when you record him while playing with you and your other streamer friends.

“Awww, look at me and s/o walking together and building snowmen! We are so—”

*Kills him* “…” “s/O WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME ARE YOU TRYING TO BREAK UP WITH MEEEEEEE????”*loud sobbing*

Obviously, no, it’s just what you had to do as an imposter and you have to apologise to your sulky boyfriend.

Fun fact: bought your two of those matching cat ears headphones and he’s so sappy, dear god- he loves those earphones.

Also your voice?? IT’S SO GOOD??? You made your own songs and that’s so cool!! No wonder your fanbase is so big, damn-

And he’s obviously your biggest fan! <

Jason Todd

He’s trying, he really is. Because the last thing he played before he died were Game Boys and then he awoken to Wii Games, Nintendo Switches and whatever the fuck those online games are.

Those sus game ads he clicked randomly made him question what happened when he was still dead-

Jason thinks it’s pretty cool you stream gaming content and all, although don’t ask him to play any RPG with you because he’ll rage quit. He will go insane.

Jason keeps insisting on wanting to join your streams in Among Us but like come on- WE ALL KNOW HE’S GONNA START RAGING MORE-

When he gets killed, he calls the imposter a “Joker” 💀 Sometimes you have to calm him down and tell him it’s their role as imposter to do this. Also, when he gets imposter, he’ll kill everyone except you. Like he’s your bodyguard or something and everyone’s out to get you. You don’t even need to be imposter. If you did kill him before, he’ll kill you back though-

He’s okay if you let him play Minecraft together though, he finds it peaceful (on creative mode).

Listens to your songs on repeat while he’s repairing vehicles or hear it live on your stream when he’s reading. Wholesome supportive boyfriend stuff. <3

Tim Drake

Immediately follows all forms of social media you have, and give subs to every time you go live and stream. No hesitation.

He thinks it’s cool you stream games and all, something he wished to do but just doesn’t have much time to do so, and that he has no idea how to start up a fanbase anyways so-

Tim would join your streams every once in a while to play with you and he doesn’t mind any sort of games, he’s pretty good with the controller… well, maybe RPG. Because if he’s doing a multiplayer game like with Genshin needing to join servers and all, most of the time, people wouldn’t listen to his plans and end up dying and then he goes berserk. Only you listen s/o… wHY?? WHY DOES NOBODY LISTEN TO HIS STRATS????

Also, cat ears headphones?? He has one and he looks so cute in it and would ask if you want one too- he only wears those headphones in private though, or in front of you.

Anyways, Tim loves your singing too! Would listen it live or hear it on Spotify if it’s available. If you sing covers, it’s gonna ruin him. He can’t listen to the original track anymore because it’s just not the same-

Overall, gamer boyfriend you got here. <3

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delicatebarness · 2 months

Text

cry baby | the alt ending

Summary: In the original plot of Cry Baby, John Walker never disappeared and our Cry Baby never met Peter Parker. Instead, her relationship with John blossomed into something Bucky and the rest of the Avengers hated. Turns out, they were right to hate him as his love for their girl was just a game. A game Bucky would not survive.

Warning: Abduction/Kidnapping. Physical Restraints. Emotional and Psychological Abuse. Violence and Physical Injury. Death and Grief. Manipulation and Coercion. Self-Neglect.

Word Count: 3743

Spotify Playlist | Support: Ko-FI

Series Masterlist

A/N: Hi, so I know this was not what won on the poll but, I wanted to do it anyway. I would just like to remind everyone that this is not canon. In the second installment of Cry Baby 'Badge & Blood' Bucky is very much alive and happy! This is just a write-up of the original ending, the ending that almost was. I would say I hope you enjoy it, but it is heartbreaking.- B

Never did you imagine yourself in a situation like this– tied to a chair in the middle of a grimy, abandoned warehouse. Cold metal biting into your wrists, and damp, musty air filling your lungs with each shaky breath. Your mind raced with thoughts on how you got here, how you feel for John’s charm, even with Bucky’s warnings and Steve’s relentless attempts to protect you. Everyone saw something you couldn’t– or wouldn’t. There was a danger behind John’s charismatic facade, one you were now painfully aware of.

Pounding against your chest, your heart raced as you heard noises outside the warehouse. Creaking open, you strained against your bindings, hoping it wasn’t John about to walk in. To your immense relief, it’s Bucky. His piercing blue eyes widened in horror as he took in the sight of you, bound and helpless.

“Sweetheart!” he shouts, sprinting toward you.

“No, Bucky! Stop!” you screamed, your voice cracking with desperation.

Skidding to a halt, Bucky was barely inches away from an almost invisible wire running across the floor. Looking down, realization dawned on his face. Another step and the warehouse would have exploded, taking you both with it.

Before you can say anything else, slow, mocking claps begin to echo through the warehouse. As John steps out of the shadows, your blood runs cold, his smug grin sends chills down your spine. Sauntering over, John stands behind you, his hand resting on the nape of your neck, stroking your hair.

“Good guard dog,” John sneers at Bucky, his voice dripping with condescension. “Always showing up right on time.”

You couldn’t hold back the tears any longer, and you hated yourself for it. The tears begin to stream down your face, sobs escaping your lips. You hate how vulnerable you felt, how helpless. Most of all, you hated that you let John hold this power over you.

Bucky’s fists clench at his side, eyes now burning in anger. “Let her go, Walker,” he growled, his voice low and as dangerous as ever.

John laughed, the sound causing your skin to crawl. “Why would I do that? You see, Little Cry Baby here is my insurance policy. Steve will do anything to save his precious little sister. Isn’t that right, baby?”

Turning your head away, you were unable to look at John. Your mistake and its weight crashed down on you. He never loved you, you were just a pawn in his twisted game, to gain control over Steve’s territory.

“Don’t you dare hurt her,” Bucky warned with gritted teeth, taking a cautious step back.

John’s fingers tightened in your hair, pulling your head back, forcing you to look up at him. Devoid of any genuine emotion, his eyes were cold. “Hurt her? Oh, James, you misunderstand me. I have no intention of hurting my baby. Not if Steve cooperates.”

You could see Bucky’s desire to tear John apart, but he knew he had to be careful. It would only take one wrong move, and the whole place would go up in flames. He tried to calm himself, taking deep breaths.

“What do you want, John?” Bucky asks, his voice steadying. “Just tell me what you want.”

John’s smile widens, and he releases his grip on your hair, walking around to face Bucky. “Finally, we’re getting somewhere. It’s simple… really. I want Steve to relinquish control of his operations to me. All of it. He steps down, and I take over. In return, I’ll let the little bitch go, unharmed.”

There was conflict in Bucky’s eyes. He wanted to save you, but he knew the cost and it wasn’t his to pay. Steve’s leadership had kept things in balance, handing that control over to John would plunge the city into chaos.

“Think about it, James,” John said, his tone almost casual. “You could have her in your arms within minutes, and all it takes is a little power shift. It’s not so much to ask, is it?”

Bucky tried to keep his composure. “You don’t understand, Walker. Even if I wanted to hand over control, it’s not my power to give. The respect and loyalty Steve has, can’t just be transferred to you, especially not by me. The city won’t follow you.”

Irritation flashed in John’s eyes, but he quickly regained his smug demeanor. “Yeah, I know. But fear? Fear is a powerful motivator, James. Surely, out of everyone, you know that.”

Bucky looks at you, and you can see the torment in his eyes. He’s weighing his options, trying to find a way out of this mess. You shake your head, pleading with him silently. You don’t want him to sacrifice everything for you. You don’t want to be the reason your brother loses everything he’s built.

“Don’t do it, Bucky,” you manage to say through your sobs. “Don’t let him win.”

John’s expression darkens, and he steps closer to you, a menacing edge to his voice. “Oh, baby, you should know by now that you don’t get a say in this.”

Watching as John’s fingers trail down your cheek, Bucky’s jaw clenched. Each touch left a shiver of dread in their wake. His fingers lingered, tracing patterns on your skin with a sickening intimacy, your stomach churning. His eyes never left Bucky’s, reveling in the torment he was causing.

With a twisted smile, John leaned in close, his breath ghosting over your face. His lips, cold and mocking, pressed against your forehead in a perverse parody of affection. Bucky’s knuckles turned white as his fists tightened.

John’s voice was a low whisper as he continued his charade, placing another kiss on your temple. “Such a good girl,” he taunted, his eyes gleaming with pleasure.

“Bucky,” you whimpered, your sobs broke through the fog of despair, snapping Bucky out of his rage.

“Sweetheart, I’m here,” his voice cut through the haze, grounding and steady. He was a beacon in the strong of your fear. “Look at me.”

Through the blur of your tears, your eyes found his. The blue of his gaze was like an anchor, steadying you– pulling you back from the edge of your panic.

“That’s it, focus on me,” he encouraged softly. His tone was soothing despite the fury simmering beneath his skin. “You’re doing great, that’s my girl.”

John’s grip found your hair again, but you kept your eyes locked on Bucky’s, drawing strength from his unwavering presence. Each breath you took, ragged and shallow, slowly became a little steadier under his watchful gaze.

Enraged by the connection between you and Bucky, John’s face twisted with jealousy and fury. He decided it was time to sever that bond once and for all. Then, with a swift, cruel motion, he pulled out a gun. The metallic click of the safety being disengaged.

Eye widening in alarm, Bucky never breaks eye contact with you. “Stay with me,” he whispered, his voice unwavering. The shot rings out, a deafening crack echoing through the warehouse.

Time seemed to slow as Bucky staggered backward, his eyes still locked on yours even as the force drove him back. Instinctively, his hand reached up to his chest, where a dark, crimson stain began to spread through his shirt.

“Bucky!” you scream, the sound tearing from your throat. Your heart shattered at the sight of him wounded and bleeding.

His leg trembled as he tried to steady himself, fighting to stay upright. His lips moved, forming words you couldn’t hear. The pain was clear in his eyes.

“No!” you sobbed, struggling against your bindings. Rope cut into your wrists, but with your entire focus on Bucky, you barely felt the physical pain.

The blood flowered faster now, and Bucky’s face grew pale. He dropped to his knees, still trying to keep his eyes on you, his breath coming in ragged gasps. Echoing through the warehouse, your cries were a haunting symphony of anguish filling the cold, and empty space.

Leaning in closer, John’s breath was hot and rancid against your ear. “I don’t think you’re going to be able to patch this one up, baby,” he whispered, word lacing with cruel satisfaction.

Desperation and rage collided within you. “Bucky!” you screamed, your voice raw, a testament to your fear. You watched as he struggled to stay conscious, his vibrant blue eyes now clouded with pain.

Fading into the periphery, John’s taunts became a distant murmur. Your world narrowed to a single point: Bucky. The man you love, now bleeding out before you, each drop a silent scream of your own helplessness.

John’s laughter echoed through the warehouse, a sinister chorus bouncing off the walls, but you didn’t hear it. Your focus was on the rise and fall of Bucky’s chest, the silent plea in his eyes for you to stay.

Looming over you like a dark cloud suffocating your every breath, John leaned in even closer. His voice was a venomous whisper in your ear. “This is all your fault, you know,” he hissed, words dropping from his lips with malice. “If you had just listened to him, if you stayed away from me, your precious dog wouldn’t be dying right now.”

Wrapping your hair around his hand, John yanked your head back painfully, forcing you to face him. “Look at me,” he snarled, his eyes blazing. “He’s dying because of you. You brought this on him, you pathetic bitch.”

“No,” you sobbed, shaking your head as best you can. “Please, let me go to him. I need to help him.”

A cruel smile played on his lips as he released your hair, stepping back just enough to let you see the full extent of his deranged delight. "Go to what?" he sneered. "He’s dead! There’s nothing left for you to do!"

Desperation clawed at your throat, your voice breaking with each word as you begged, "Please, John, let me go to him. I need to help him. Please."

John’s laughter echoed through the warehouse, a chilling sound that bounced off the grimy walls. He seemed to relish in your despair, feeding off your pain. "Pathetic," he muttered, shaking his head in mock pity.

Your heart shattered at his words, but you refused to give up hope. You strained against your bindings, your eyes locked onto Bucky's pale, motionless form. Every fiber of your being screamed to be by his side, to hold him, to somehow make everything right again.

"Please," you whispered, your voice a broken plea. "Let me go to him. I love him."

For a moment, John’s expression faltered, a flicker of something almost human crossing his face. Then, with a sigh, he waved his hand dismissively. "Fine," he said, his voice dripping with false magnanimity.

John cut the ropes binding you, and you stumbled forward, collapsing near Bucky. Desperation fueled your movements as you crawled toward him, carefully dodging the explosives trigger with a frantic, shaky determination.

Your hands trembled as they reached his face, the chill of his skin seeping into your bones. "Bucky," you whispered, tears streaming uncontrollably down your cheeks. "Please, stay with me. Please."

Bucky's eyes fluttered open, the light in them dim but still present. He managed a weak smile, his lips barely moving as he whispered, "I love you, sweetheart."

Cradling his head in your lap, you rocked back and forth, your sobs echoing through the empty warehouse. "I love you," you choked out, your voice raw with emotion. "I always have."

His breathing was shallow, each breath a struggle. You gently stroked his hair, your tears mingling with the blood staining his shirt. "Stay with me," you pleaded, your heart breaking with every second that passed. "Please, don't leave me."

Bucky's hand weakly reached up to touch your face, his fingers brushing against your cheek. "You... you were always the only good in my life," he murmured, his voice barely audible. "Don't... don't lose that."

As his eyes began to close again, you pressed a kiss to his lips, your tears wetting his skin. "I won't," you promised, your voice a whisper. "I won't."

Suddenly, the door burst open again, and you hear Steve and Sam’s voices cutting through the haze of your despair. The chaotic moment seemed to slow as they rushed in, their presence barely registering with you until Natasha and Wanda followed closely behind them. Gasping at the sight, Wanda’s face paled as she collapsed into Sam’s side. He caught her with ease, his expression hardening with resolve.

Lifting your head slowly, your tear-filled gaze locked onto Steve. His breath caught in his throat as he took in the scene before him: his little sister, soaked in the blood of his best friend, cradling his lifeless body.

“Stevie, please,” you sobbed, your voice trembling and desperate. “Please, Stevie, bring him back.”

Steve's heart broke at the sight of you, his protective instincts roaring to the forefront. He wanted to rush to you, to hold you and somehow make everything right. But the harsh reality of the situation held him back, his steps faltered as he stared at John, standing with a gun pointed in your direction.

Seeing the despair on his face, John smirked, his grip on the gun tightening. "Isn't this touching?" he sneered. "But take one more step, Rogers, and I'll have a lovely little pile of Avengers to clean up."

Steve eye’s bore into John with a searing intensity, and anger and cold calculation blended dangerously. His voice was taut, he struggled to maintain a steady tone despite the underlying edge of desperation. “What do you want, Walker?”

John’s gaze slid over to Steve, his smirk widening with a casual, almost dismissive air. “Oh, the usual,” he drawled. "A luxurious lifestyle, perhaps a winning lottery ticket, and a hot tub would be nice."

Steve’s silence stretched out, heavy and suffocating, speaking volumes without a single word. His gaze remained locked onto John, unyielding and resolute despite the turmoil roiling within him.

John’s smirk faltered as his expression darkened, his patience wearing thin. “Not in the mood for some light comedy?” he taunted, his voice dripping with disdain. “Fine… I want your empire.”

Steve’s jaw tightened, the muscle working beneath his skin as he fought to keep his composure. The sarcasm dripped from his lips, sharp and venomous, a thin veneer masking his boiling frustration. “Still cracking jokes, I see.”

The weight of John’s demand settled heavily between them, a stark contrast to the dangerous levity John was trying to maintain. Steve’s eyes, though filled with pain, were also fierce with determination. Every second counted, and he knew that his next move would be critical.

John’s demeanor shifted abruptly, his smirk draining from his face, a glare taking its place. The mockery faded, and his voice only dripped with a cold menace. "You’re really risking your sister’s life just to be sarcastic? How touching, Rogers."

Steve's gaze remained unwavering, his eyes blazing with fierce determination despite the dire circumstances. "She’s the only leverage you have,” he said, his voice steady once again but now sharped with intensity. “I thought you were just stupid, but I didn’t think you were this much of an idiot."

John’s face contorted with rage, Steve was wearing down his patience. “You think you can outsmart me, Rogers? I want it all. Everything.”

Steve’s jaw tightened as he processed John's demand and the weight of it. The silence was heavy as Steve weighed his options, the urgency of the situation pressed down on him. Each second passing stretched out. He was caught between his protective instincts, love for you, and the responsibility of maintaining the city’s balance. Then, with a deep, shuddering breath, he reluctantly removed his leather jacket, the solemn gesture of surrender.

"Fine," Steve sighed, his voice heavy with defeat and resignation. "You can have it. Here." his voice was firm yet weary.

Tossing the jacket toward John with a resigned flick of his wrist, the fabric fluttered through the air. It landed near John’s feet, its descent slow and deliberate. John's eyes widened with surprise, and greed, a malicious satisfaction flickering across his face.

For a brief moment, John's surprise was evident, but his expression quickly shifted to one of greedy triumph. He stepped closer, his gaze fixed on the jacket with mean anticipation. The power he had sought was now within his grasp, and Steve’s surrender had given him exactly what he wanted.

John had momentarily lowered his guard. It's just enough for Sam and Natasha to spring into action. Natasha dashes forward, her movements swift and precise. Sam follows, and together they tackle John.

Steve and Wanda, faces etched with a blend of anguish and determination, rushed to your side. The urgency in their movements was palpable as they reached you and Bucky. Their eyes were wide with a mix of fear and hope, but the grim reality quickly set in.

Bucky lay motionless on the cold, grimy floor, his skin ashen and lifeless. The once vibrant blue of his eyes had dulled, and his breathing had ceased entirely. Steve dropped to his knees beside him, his hands trembling as he tried in vain to check for any signs of life. Wanda, her face pale and stricken, dropping to your side.

Clinging to Bucky’s cold body, your sobs grew more desperate and ragged. Your pleas for him to come back, for any sign of life, were met with the harsh silence of finality. Steve’s voice broke as he called out Bucky’s name, his frustration, and grief mingling with the hopelessness of the situation. The efforts to revive him were pointless; Bucky remained still, the light of life extinguished.

Sam and Natasha moved with practiced precision, their synchronized efforts overwhelming John with brutal efficiency. Sam gripped onto John’s arms, forcing him down onto his knees while Natasha landed strikes with a vengeance. Struggling, John’s resistance was nothing against their combined strength and skill.

With each blow, Natasha delivered a cathartic release of guilt and anger she had bottled up. Her fists moved like lightning, hitting harder with every strike. John’s face contorted in pain, Sam’s held him in an iron hold he could not break free from. Echoing through the warehouse was the sound of flesh hitting flesh.

“Nat! That’s enough!” Sam’s voice cut through the air, his words barely reaching her. Lost in her fury, her sole focus was making John pay for the suffering. Her knuckles were raw and bloodied, but she showed no signs of slowing down.

“Natasha!” Sam shouted again, his voice more urgent, he tried to break through her blind rage. “It’s over! He’s done!”

She couldn’t stop, she didn’t want to stop. Her vision was blurred by tears of rage, Her fists were pounding mercilessly into the man’s already broken body.

As the sounds of Natasha’s sobs mingled with the stillness of the warehouse, you remained centered around Bucky. Steve’s face was a mask of torment, his usually strong and steady demeanor cracked at the sight of his best friend. He reached out, touching Bucky’s cold cheek, his hand trembling. “Buck,” he whispered, his voice breaking. “I’m so sorry.”

ONE YEAR LATER

The chill of the autumn air bit through the leather jacket. Save for the rustling of leaves and the distant hum of the city, the cemetery was quiet.

Kneeling down, you traced the letters etched into the cold marble: “James Buchanan Barnes– the true heart of the family.” Your fingers lingered on his name, the name that once filled your life with love and laughter, Now, it was a reminder of everything that had been taken from you.

In your other hand, you carried a bottle of his favorite beer and a pack of cigarettes. You placed them carefully at the base of the cold, grey stone.

You sat down on the damp ground, resting your back against the headstone. Pulling your knees to your chest, you took a deep breath and closed your eyes.

“I’m here, Buck,” you whispered, your voice carried away by the wind. “Just like always.”

As the wind picked up, you pulled the leather jacket tighter around your body. No matter the weather, you never moved. These couple of hours a day with Bucky were sacred, your time to feel close to him.

“I brought your favorites,” you murmured, glancing down at the beer and cigarettes. “I know it’s not much, but it feels like you’re still here with me what I do.”

You often found yourself talking to him, sharing your thoughts and feelings, even though you knew he couldn’t respond. He’d probably tell you to stop crying, anyway.

“Sam and Wanda are holding up,” you continued your voice still barely a whisper. “It’s been hard for them, but they’re doing their best. Steve… he’s trying so hard to be strong, but I see the pain. He misses you so much, Bucky.”

You took a deep breath, letting the cool fresh air fill your lungs. “Nat, she’s been a rock for all of us. But, I know she still carries the guilt of that night. She blames herself for a lot, she doesn’t need to, it wasn’t her fault.”

Tears began spilling down your cheeks. “I miss you, Bucky. Every single day. There’s not a second that goes by that I don’t think about you.”

The wind rustled the leaves around you, and for a moment, it felt like Bucky was there, his presence a comforting balm to your aching heart.

“Everything reminds me of you,” you admitted, your voice cracking. “I keep expecting to see you around every corner, to hear your voice, to feel your touch. But you’re not there. And it hurts, Bucky. It hurts so fucking much.”

As the hours passed, the sky shifted from the dull gray to a deep black. Stars beginning to twinkle above, but you remained where you were, lost in your grief.

Exhaustion weighed heavily on you, and your body. It bore marks of sleepless nights and days spent in mourning. The dark circles under your eyes and a gaunt appearance spoke volumes about your lack of self-care.

“I don’t know how to do this without you,” you whispered, your years falling freely. “I don’t know how to be okay without you.”

Your eyelids grew heavy and in the quiet of the cemetery, with the bottle of beer and cigarette packet lying beside you, you fell asleep. Finally, find a moment of rest in the place where you feel closest to him.

---

Series Masterlist

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disclove · 6 months

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distance makes the heart fonder. word count: 910. genre: best friends to strangers, angst! author's note: hiii (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ) this is super angsty LOL enjoy! pls interact if you enjoyed!

"distance makes the heart fonder." she never bought that saying, because why would you need to be separated from someone you love to realize you love them, or to love them more?

but now the validity of the statement was crashing down on her like a ton of bricks.

she never thought her friendship with donghyuck would ever be long-term. she knew he would leave. she knew that she was replaceable. but it didn't mean she wanted it to happen. she cherished every moment they spent together. they spent hours together, either in each other's dorms, or in the library, or in the dining hall—they never needed to make plans, because they were comfortable in each other's presence alone.

even if they weren't physically together, they would be texting every day. and even if she wanted to, it was nearly impossible to scroll to the very top of their message history.

but now, all of that was over. because of another girl.

and she realized that she was undoubtedly in love with him; she was in love with a boy whose heart would never be hers.

but where did she go wrong? she remembered all of her friends excitedly asking if donghyuck, her new friend, was into her.

"you guys are always together, every second of the day you guys aren't in class! he has to like you." "you guys are so cute! i hope he confesses soon."

maybe her friends made her overconfident. but clearly, he was never going to confess. maybe because he never liked her.

well, maybe she never should've introduced him to her friends. maybe she never should've let him get close with her circle of people. if he never got to know her friends, she could selfishly keep him all to herself.

the day her heart shattered was the day she went to jisung's house party.

about an hour into the party, she turned the corner to find the bathroom, and saw him making out with one of her friends.

one of her friends, that encouraged her to date haechan. the irony.

before they even noticed her presence, she just ran. yeah, that's all she's good at, anyway. running away from everything. running away from confrontation when her friends inevitably leave her, running away from conflicts by supressing her feelings.

and no one even notices her absence when she runs out of the party, tears streaming down her face as she runs all the way down the block back to her dorm. and she felt so utterly alone.

haechan was her everything, and she felt so bare having no one else to turn to. and in the next week, she pretends not to notice the hickeys on his neck, she pretends to be sick to avoid seeing him.

unfortunately, he knows her better than that.

"i know you're not sick, are you okay?" he texts her.

"not really." and she refuses to elaborate. all she wanted to do was forget.

how do you fix a broken heart?

she cancels on the day a few of their friends were supposed to go out for dinner. he's concerned, texting her if she's okay, but she forces herself to stay distant.

"i'm ok." i've been crying for hours every day trying to get over you, but i wouldn't tell you that, would i?

he still brings her back an iced coffee. he got her order wrong, and accidentally ordered her a straight black coffee with no milk or sugar, but he had frantically grabbed a handful of sugar packets in an attempt to fix the mistake.

she offers a halfhearted smile and thanks him, but it's taking everything in her not to start crying.

she regrets not trying to maintain the friendship with him, but it's not like he was trying very hard either.

they barely saw each other outside of class. and every time she checks his location, he was with her.

replaced.

she felt so utterly replaceable and forgotten, her eyes tearing up uncontrollably whenever she sees haechan do everything they used to do with another girl. from their spotify habits to hanging out together in his dorm with the lights down low, decorative LED lights on, and projector playing a movie that neither of them were actually paying attention to.

she opens her mouth to ask if he wants to hang out sometime, but he had already turned his back to leave her dorm.

so she just says, "see you", and goes back into her dorm.

it was heartbreaking, but she had to accept the truth. he was gone.

lee haechan would never be hers, and she would never be his.

one thing was for sure. he was gone, and he was never coming back. their relationship was never going to be the same again.

and the saying was true. as much as she wanted to hate him for everything, she couldn't. she was stupidly in love, and it just got worse as time went on. everything she did reminded herself of him. the snacks they always ate together, the specific library rooms in the basement that they regularly booked every week that were now occupied by him and a different girl, their identical boba order, even her phone case.

but she had to move on. whatever they had was undoubtedly over. forever. the two of them would date, and she would distract herself from thinking about him, meet new people, and move on eventually.

#nct drabbles #nct dream scenarios #nct dream angst #nct scenarios #haechan x reader #nct angst #haechan imagines #haechan angst #haechan drabbles

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the-goo-goo-muck · 14 days

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NOW PLAYING

MELODIC

what music do they play when you two get to it?

Starring: Choso Kamo, Kento Nanami, Kiyotaka Ijichi, Satoru Gojo, Shiu Kong, Suguru Geto, Sukuna Ryomen, Takuma Ino, Toji Fushiguro

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Choso Kamo: Clueless <3

“Music? You’d like me to play music while we have sex?” His bluntness never ceases to embarrass you.

“Well not if you don’t want to, it was just a suggestion. It might make things less awkward for you, you know?”

Flash forward to that night, he’s got you sitting on his lap, he leans over to push play on his phone, & you burst out laughing.

“Is something wrong? Do you not like this song?”

“…Cho, it’s Shake It Off by Taylor Swift.” He nods, so eager.

“I know, isn’t it such a good song?” & you just can’t say anything, not when he looks so excited, hopeful that you’re pleased with him for his song choice. So you spend the night orgasming to Choso’s Spotify Pump You Up playlist.

Needless to say, you picked the music from then on.

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Kento Nanami: Unbothered <3

If music is something you wanted, or that made you more comfortable, of course he’d play it, but Nanami isn’t a big music listener. & ultimately, anything that takes away even an ounce of his attention from fucking you senseless isn’t ideal for him.

But if you requested, or he thought to try it, he’d probably find some lofi playlist on YouTube, turn it on, & completely forget about it. Something relaxing, so that after he’s content with how ruined you are, he can tickle your back & play with your hair until you fall asleep.

But sometimes an ad comes on because no way is Nanami paying for YouTube premium, even if he is loaded as hell, which frustrates him so thoroughly that he just shuts the laptop altogether & tosses it on the floor.

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Kiyotaka Ijichi: Too Concerned <3

He’s so genuinely concerned about it the entire time. He’s done far too much research about this; he looked on multiple different music streaming services for the best playlists to listen to when having sex. After mulling through the hundreds of lists that include songs by Megan Thee Stallion & XXX by Kim Petras, he finds something he thinks is…suitable. At least, it’s not too on the nose.

But he’s barely gotten your shirt off before a Ke$ha song comes on, & Kiyotaka turns beet red.

“I-I’m sorry, if you don’t like this song, I can ch-change it,” & he’s so flustered, so embarrassed.

“Kiyo, we don’t have to play music, sweetie,” you coo, & he knows you’re teasing him, just a little bit, but he’s so grateful anyway.

“Oh, thank God.”

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Satoru Gojo: Shithead <3

Gojo thinks he’s just soooo funny.

He’s three fingers deep, his spit dripping down your chin as he kisses you, humping your leg, when you push back against his shoulder & roll your eyes. “Satoru, really? Sexyback? Justin Timberlake?”

His grin is shit-eating. “What, Princess? This song doesn’t get you going? Your pretty girl’s telling me otherwise with how she’s clenching around my fingers.”

“Fuck off.”

“No, no, if this isn’t doin’ for you, I’ll change it.” You bite back a moan & smack a pillow across his face when All Through the Night by Boyz II Men turns on.

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Shiu Kong: Normal, For Once <3

Actually probably has pretty good music taste. He hates the term “indie,” but he’s also not into super mainstream stuff. & sure, maybe he wants to show off his music to you. . .just don’t say that.

He likes things with a heavy bass & not many lyrics, he doesn’t want anything distracting him from how good you feel. He controls the playlist, though, he never lets you pick the music.

“Because last time you chose the music, I fucked you to the beat of the Tarzan soundtrack by Phil Collins.” He’s scrolling through Apple Music, queuing up some of his favorites.

“But—“

“Don’t even start with me, doll. I don’t care how much you like those songs, it was fucking gross, listening to a Disney movie soundtrack with my dick in you.”

“Well, you didn’t have to make it weird, Shiu.” You folded your arms, pouting.

“It was weird to begin with!”

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Suguru Geto: Back in Black <3

“You’re really aging yourself here, Sugu,” you tease. You didn’t even recognize half the songs he played with how old they were. Because, quote, “music was just better back then.” Yeah, back before he was even alive. But try tellin’ that to Van Halen over here.

“This is a great song, babe. Sorry that you don’t have good taste.”

“Coming from the man with the taste of a 50 year old divorced man.” It was cute, how he could have you moaning around his dick & then arguing about music within the same couple of minutes. Had he even finished? You couldn’t remember, & you were busy now.

“Hey! Divorced dad rock is a great genre of music.”

“Not when I’m sucking you off, loser.”

“Well, when I’m giving you head, you can pick the song, how about that? But when you’re sucking my dick, I control the speaker.” At this point, it's simply an immaturity contest.

“No, Sugu, I cannot deepthroat your cock to AC/DC ever again. Or any song with an electric guitar solo.”

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Sukuna Ryomen: Disturbing <3

“‘Kuna, what the fuck is this?” you mutter, leaning to squint at the screen of your laptop. “Sounds of war & explosion, 10 hour asmr version?”

“You asked me to play something, woman, & now you’re complaining?” He drags you by your chin back to his lips.

“I meant something like music. . .but sure, make me seem like the weird one in this situation.” You shrug, & he hates this sarcasm you’re so fond of.

“Weird? What is weird about this?” & you almost feel bad because he looks a little upset that you don’t like his creepy asmr.

“I genuinely cannot tell if you’re being serious. I’m not a kink shamer, ‘Kuna, but this is fuckin’ weird.”

“Shut up, woman, you will cease to care once I put my cock in you.”

You shrug. “Fair enough.”

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Takuma Ino: Tearjerker <3

He’s eating you out from behind, a personal favorite of his, when you’re turning your head at an uncomfortable angle as the first notes of a new song play.

“If you, if you could return. . .”

“T-Takuma,” you attempt to speak. “Why are playing Linger?”

It takes him a moment to come out of it, too entranced by your cunt. “Wh-what? I thought you loved this song,” & he looks so sincerely confused why you’d be bothered. Frankly, he’d tuned the music out completely. How could he think about anything else but this?

“Yeah, when we’re in the car or something, not when you’re eating me out. This song is so sad! It’s a breakup song.” He simply does not get it.

“Well, I like it.”

“You’re not even listening to it!”

“Are you? Fuck, that means I’m doing a bad job then.” Soon, you’re tuning out the music too.

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Toji Fushiguro: Fuckboy <3

Puts on some shit by Chase Atlantic because he thinks that's what girls like & promptly forgets it’s even playing. He does not care, just wants to bone, no other thoughts, head empty. A couple minutes in, you turn off his godawful tik tok playlist & he doesn’t even notice. Once he’s pulling out & shucking the condom somewhere, he looks blankly around for a second, then back at you.

“Hey, did you turn the music off?”

“Yeah, Toji, Nasty Dog by Sir-Mix-A-Lot wasn’t exactly getting me off,” you scoff, sneering at the name.

“Hey, I got that from you, brat. It’s from that stupid Hugh Jackman edit you keep watching. . .I’m hotter than him by the way.”

“You’re both old enough to be my dad, but sure, Toj’, you’re hotter.”

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LOOKING FOR SOME MORE? MASTERLIST <3

LOOKING FOR SOMETHING SPECIFIC? ASK <3

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kerjaath · 15 days

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Singin' In The Shower

you thought the house was empty.

OR, you were taking a shower and started to get a little loud, unaware Yumi was still home.

reader lives in tgc house

no reader gender specified

word count: 1.1K

AN: hello everyoneeeee!!!!!!!!!!! first actual full fic posted on tumblr :333 if u wanna see more i gotchu!!! my fanfic suggestions r open and ready :3

AO3 LINK

⋆｡‧˚ʚ🍓ɞ˚‧｡⋆

the house is always loud. whether it be breakfast time and everyone is huddled in the living room, stuffing their faces as they laugh at whatever is possibly playing on the t.v., or if it's the middle of the night and everyone is still streaming together.

quiet moments are rare, but the volume of the house never really bothered you too much.

It was your average, slow Thursday. Nothing was really going on all day, but when you left the shrouded comfort of your room to scavenge for a snack, you weren't too surprised to find the cabinets completely empty. Well, besides a stack of gamersupps and two empty granola bar boxes (damn you, Tanner, for taking the last ones without throwing out the boxes..)

You were in luck to find something in the fridge, though, and it wasn't long before you finished eating and headed back towards your bedroom.

unfortunately, before you could even slink into your room Isaac shouted towards you,

"Hey, we're all gonna go hit up Raising Cane's for dinner, you wanna come?" He held his hand on a corner of the wall, leaning towards you. Your cheeks slightly flustered up,

"Oh, I just ate, you guys can go without me," you laughed lightly to yourself. The chances of you eating right before everyone suddenly wanted to go out to eat - just your luck.

" 'Kay, well we're all gonna head out in a few minutes." Isaac already headed for the front door, where you assumed everyone else was waiting. You made a small hum, turning back to your bedroom door.

But, for a moment, you stopped.

Everyone else going out for dinner… you staying home, alone… home. Alone.

You smiled to yourself. You could do and be as silly as you wanted while everyone was gone without the fear of someone being nearby! Like… singing in the shower.

You already needed a shower anyway, your hair wasn't particularly in its best state, so why waste this chance to sing your heart out?

You turned on your heel, heading for the bathroom and setting a towel out. You waited for a moment, though. You couldn't just jump in the shower and sing your heart out…

You briskly walked back to the kitchen, turning to the front door. No one stood there… you quickly skipped your way to the window next to the door, moving a blind over to check to front yard. No one in sight.

You backed up, listening to the house… silence.

You shuffled to everyone's bedrooms, listening at the door before peeking in to check for anyone. But your search came back fruitless. You smiled, letting out a cackle, as you rushed to the bathroom.

Ushering the door closed, you started the water as you opened your phone, opening Spotify to find a fitting playlist 2000's girly hits… your 2023 Spotify wrapped… maybe even a playlist you couldn't stop listening to 24/7???

you paused for a moment. Yumi's album sat in your reccommended artist's playlist panels. You cracked a smile, clicking the playlist as you grabbed your speaker on the bathroom sink, hooking your Bluetooth up.

You never really sat and truly listened to Yumi's music on your own. There were the few moments you did, but it was never really a common everyday sort of thing. It was rarely even a monthly thing. But you liked his music. A part of you really only liked it so much because you could endulge in your guilty pleasure - just sitting and listening to Yumi's voice.

When you climbed in the shower, you just couldn't hold back your voice. Screaming along with Yumi, it felt almost… requited. As if he was really with you.

You barely even washed your hair, too busy flailing your hands around, dancing as the music got louder and louder.

...

When your solo concert finished up, your skin soggy and wrinkly, you climbed out of the shower and wrapped a towel around your chest. It draped down your stomach and past your waist, stopping around your mid-thigh. As you left the bathroom, you hummed a section of a song you didn't finish before you got out.

You were walking peacefully back to your room, but you froze in fear as you heard a light chuckle from behind you.

as you turned around, it was none other than the man himself - Yumi - standing in the hallway, cupping his mouth, his face flushing as he tried to hold in laughter.

"I thought you guys went out to eat.." you stumbled on your own words, your face flashing pale before beating a bright red. You realized your state of clothing, or really the lack of such, and made a minor yelp noise as you pulled your towel to cover yourself. It didn't really cover you any further, but what else were you to do in the moment?

"Yeah, they went out," Yumi stiffled another laugh, "but I decied to stayed home."

"And you didn't bother to tell me??" You practically muttered your words, mentally reliving the previous 45 minutes or so in the shower.

"You know, I didn't know you liked my music that much…" he grinned.

"Oh, don't get cocky.." you turned around to not face him, shaking the red off your face before you looked back at him.

"You cannot tell anyone about this." you tried to give him a serious look. He just laughed at you further.

"Stooop, I mean it!!" You shouted at him, annoyed. You felt as if you were back in elementary school, the older cool boys teasing you...

"And why should I do that?" It was as if he couldn't smile any bigger.

"Because.." you thought for a moment, glancing at the ground in thought before looking back up, "I'll strike you a deal."

"and that is…" he turned his head slightly, an eyebrow rising. It was obvious you had intrigued and caught him in your trap...

"If you keep this a secret…" you inched closer to him, leaving a small space in-between you two. His face grew a shade of pink, and you noticed how he glanced at your towel. "I'll give you a treat."

he thought for a moment, curious as to what this "treat" was.. he slowly, ever so slightly, nodded his head, but before he could even get a word in, you jumped to action.

You quickly threw your arms up and around his head, tugging his face down to your level, and kissed him.

Before he could even react, you turned on your heel and increased your pace to get back to your room, an uncontrollable smile taking over your burning face.

⋆｡‧˚ʚ🍓ɞ˚‧｡⋆

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russett-pots · 2 years

Text

Ultimate Meet and Greet

Park Jinkyung (Wooyeon)

Tags: Choking, pussy slapping, baby-trapping???

Words: 3.6k

Another request.

Well here is another small group.

Finally, you are able to line up to buy the albums you wanted. It may just be a small group but Woo!ah! is your favorite group and finally, you got your first piece of merch. You notice that with every purchase of the album, there is a raffle offer for the fan sign event where you can meet and greet with your favorite idols.

You can finally meet Wooyeon, your ult ever since they debuted. But what are the chances of that? You only bought one album and the person before you bought more than ten. He probably has a better chance of meeting Woo!ah!. But regardless why not shoot your shot? No harm in signing up for the fan sign event. If you win then that’s nice but if you don’t you still have your album.

When you get home, the first thing you do is that you open the album. All the photocards and the freebies. You only got two photo cards. One of Wooyeon. That’s nice and the other is Nana. She was your initial favorite. She is the most popular member and has a lot of activities. Something you are sure that the other members are jealous of.

But your still favorite is Wooyeon and you are happy you got a photocard of her. Then you received a notification. It is about an email for your raffle. You see that you have successfully entered and they’ll announce the winners on Friday later this week. Now you just wait. The small chance you actually are able to get picked for the event.

Now it is Friday. You are going through a very unusually busy schedule of work and you cannot wait for the weekend. All you want is rest. This week your company had a huge data leak and your team was in charge of dealing with it. Finally, on Friday, you are able to fix everything up and hopefully, it won’t happen again.

You rest on your desk and scroll through emails. It has been some time before you went through them and now there are hundreds that you have to respond to. But one caught your eye. It isn’t a regular business email you usually received. It is from NV entertainment.

You got in! You won the slot to go to the fan sign event.

“OMG.” You almost shout.

“What is it? Is there more we have to do?” Your co-worker says.

“No! I’m going to meet Woo!ah!.”

“Woo who?”

“Woo!ah!. They’re a K-pop group.”

“Ah! K-pop. Whatever.”

It completely went over your head. It was something you forgot but now you can see you won. You finally get the chance to meet your favorite member. You just have to mention who you want to meet and they’ll give you the details. Of course, you went to your favorite, Wooyeon.

Quickly, an auto-response email was sent to you. It is the time and place where you’ll be meeting them. But you first went to HR and filed for a leave of absence the Monday after. Even if you know the event would be on a Sunday. There would be a post-fan meet high that you’ll have and you want to enjoy it when you can.

Now it is the end of the day and you can finally enjoy your time going home. You put on some music while you ride the subway. Your favorite song is playing, Catch the stars. A song that you wish would have more streams and you have tried introducing it to your friends. But anyway they haven’t listened to it.

You smile as you think about meeting Woo!ah!. Just smiling even when you see the album art on Spotify already makes you happy. But now you have to prepare yourself for Sunday.

The next day, you went shopping for toys for the members to play with. Maybe some rabbit ears for Nana or some stuffed toys for Wooyeon, Sora, Lucy, and Minseo. Something small yet meaningful for you. You hope they’ll enjoy it. Then once you get home you start to write some letters. Just short ones for the members. But when you get to Wooyeon’s you let your heart out. You put how much you are a fan and you always found happiness when you see her. Then some more cheesy stuff. You might have gone overboard but you don’t care as you saying this from your heart and maybe Wooyeon will be happy when she knows that she has touched your heart.

It is Sunday. It is D-day. You are finally going to meet Woo!ah!. You showered your best, put on some perfume, and wear your best clothes, a nice long sleeve polo and a nice pair of pants. It may just be a brief moment but you’ll experience the best afternoon of your life.

Now you are already at the venue, the line is long and the atmosphere is great. You have never seen so many fans of Woo!ah! in your life and now you can meet and make new friends.

The staff guides you to the seating areas. Your number will be called when you’ll be called to the front. You are excited. There are your favorite idols up onstage. You can see them smiling as they sign the fan’s autographs and give them a high-five. You are so excited.

Then your number is called. You walk up on stage. The staff takes your gifts and will give them to the members. The seat next to you is of a fan with Nana. She is joyfully talking to him. Then you see him move on to the next seat. The manager asks you to move to the next seat.

“Hello, I’m Nana. Nice to meet you.”

You shake nervously.

“Hmmm, is it alright if I call you oppa? You seem nervous.”

“Okay, no problem. Oppa is fine.”

“Great! How are you?”

“I’m fine. Just a little nervous. I brought you some rabbit ears for you.”

The staff gives her the headband.

“Oh, it is a perfect fit!” Nana smiles as she wears them.

“I also have a letter for you.”

“Really?!”

“Yeah, here it is.” Your hands shake as you hand over your letter. “I know it is short but I hope you’ll like it.”

She opens it and reads it for a bit. Her heart opens up. “Awww, Oppa. I love this letter. Thank you.”

“No problem.”

Then Nana signs the album and gives it to you. “Nice meeting you Oppa.” She smiles again.

Now it is your turn with Wooyeon. You are even more nervous than with Nana. She is great but Wooyeon is on a whole new level. She is the beauty that you wish your girlfriend to have. You wish she is your girlfriend.

“Hi, Nice to meet you.”

“Hi, Wooyeon.” Your voice is shaky.

“Oppa? You okay?”

“Sorry, I’m just a very big fan.”

“Awwww, I’m happy you’re my fan.”

“Here.” The staff hands over a huge bee.

“Oh, Oppa what’s this about.”

“I always say your voice to be sweet like honey. So I thought I can give you a honey bee.”

“Oh, that’s so sweet. I don’t know if I’m the best singer but this gift will help me with my singing. Thank you.”

You see that Wooyeon is also nervous. She is also shy and blushes after every interaction with you.”

“Wooyeon-ah, here. I have a letter for you.” You hand it over.

She opens it then tears start to leak from her eyes. “Oh, Oppa. You’re making me cry. This letter is so beautiful.”

“Don’t mention it. Beautiful people deserve beautiful things.”

“You’re so touching. Hold on.”

Wooyeon calls her manager and whispers something to her. The manager gives a reluctant nod to her as Wooyeon smiles.

She signs the album and on you go.

Each other interaction with the other member goes as smoothly as you think. Even as nervous as you are. Things go well. You never expect to see Woo!ah! in such a casual setting. The event ends with some games and them doing some performances of their songs. Like your favorite, I don’t miss you, Purple, and Catch the stars.

Time went by so fast. You didn’t notice that it is already at the end. Finally, the members say their goodbyes and bow to everyone. They exit the stage waving at you.

You go home in the jubilee. The fan sign of a lifetime. An experience you’ll never forget. You jump to bed and open the album to see the signatures of the members. But something falls out.

Meet me at Banpo Hangang park 8 pm tonight

-Wooyeon

You dress up nicely with the same clothes you wore to the fan meeting, putting on your best fragrance. Is this real? Did Wooyeon really ask you to meet her in a park near the Han river? A romantic place where couples would go. Does Wooyeon like you? Did you do anything that can convince you to meet her a second time? Or is this a trap where someone is going to expose you?

Are you going to risk it?

You go there cautiously, just sitting on a bench, trying to observe your surroundings. It is already 7:55 pm. There is no sign of Wooyeon. Only couples on romantic dates, watch the full moon. Then you see someone go up near the railing. She is wearing a thick jacket, a cap, and a mask.

Maybe that’s her.

You go up to this person and lean on the edge beside her.

“Wooyeon?”

She turns to you confused. It isn’t her. You are embarrassed and run away from her, face-palming yourself.

How can I be so stupid? Is Wooyeon really going to be meeting me here?

You check your watch one more time. It is 8:05 pm.

Maybe she isn’t coming. Maybe this is just a joke.

Then you bump into someone. She is wearing a cute blouse paired with jeans.

“Wooyeon?”

“Oppa? Is this really you?”

“Oh, yes. It is.”

“Oh, sorry for being late. I was over-preparing myself.”

“Don’t worry. You’re perfect as you are.”

“Thank you.”

“Why aren’t you wearing at least a mask? Isn’t anyone going to spot you?”

“To be honest. Even if I don’t wear a mask or something that can help me hide my identity. I can be fine. At least we can date openly.”

“Date? We’re dating?”

“Don’t you want to? That’s what you said in your letter. I kept on reading it even when I got home.”

You hug her tightly. It isn’t something you expected. Wooyeon loves your letter enough for her to convince you to date her?

She looks up at you and kisses you on the lips.

“Like that?” Wooyeon smiles at you.

“Very much.”

“Come on. Let’s eat.”

She clings onto your arm as you walk down the boardwalk to the seaside restaurant. You both get in and a waiter is waiting for you at the door.

“Hello, table for you?” She says.

You smile and nod. She gets the signal and seats you on the side with a great view of the river and gives you the menu to choose from.

“Have you been here?” Wooyeon asks you.

“No, I haven’t.”

“I have.”

“So, what’s good.”

“Their crabs are good and their seaweed salad.”

“Then we should get that then.”

You can for more food and decide to also get the barbeque ribs. Then the waitress arrives with the side dishes.

“Are you ready to order?”

“Uhhh…..can we haven’t he garlic butter crabs,” Wooyeon says. “Also the barbeque ribs…and the seaweed salad…”

“Is that all?” The waitress says.

“I think so.”

“Any drinks?”

“Can I have a soda?” You ask.

“I’ll just stick with water.” Wooyeon replies.

“Okay. I’ll get this started for you.” The waitress says.

“So, Wooyeon?”

“Yeah?” Wooyeon’s eyes turn up as she drinks her drink.

“Why me? Why did you choose me?”

She puts down her drink. “Well, you touched me. That letter you gave me plus….to be honest you’re handsome…” Wooyeon blushes.

“Really? I wouldn’t think you’d like me.”

“You? Of course, I’d like you. Wouldn’t you think so? Don’t you like me?”

“Well of course. You’re my favorite member?”

“Really! Sorry… I really don’t hear that people like me.”

“What do you mean?”

“People usually like Nana-unnie. She always gets attention. She’s the one that’s in dramas and on other variety shows. And here I’m just being another member of a very small girl group.”

“Don’t be sad. I would always love…”

“Love? You already love me?”

“It’s an idol thing.”

“Oh.”

“Well, I can see you’re beautiful, kind, and caring.”

“Well you don’t know what’s happening behind the scenes do you.”

“What’s there.”

“I’m not saying there is any bullying but I want to have more exposure. Be more famous and when Nana-Unnie gets everything. I’m jealous.”

“Stop talking about Nana. It’s your night and I’m here for you.”

“Thanks.”

The food arrives. The crab, ribs, and seaweed all come at the same time.

Jal meok-ke-sseum-ni-da!

Both of you dig in the food. It is delicious. You eat with Wooyeon and you smile as you see her eat well and you do too. The food is amazing and Wooyeon knows where are the nice restaurants. The crab has a savory taste that you haven’t had before and the sweet and sticky ribs are to die for. Finally, with the salad, it lightens up the pallets. It is the perfect combination for the dinner.

Once supper ends, the two of you split the bill and then escort Wooyeon out of the restaurant. She clings to your arm as you walk back to the boardwalk. It is nice and calm. The air is cool and there is a very weak breeze.

“How’s idol life?”

“Not much. We don’t do much remember. Just some promotions for the songs. I don’t go to a lot of variety shows or anything else. Sometimes we go to music shows at least.”

“I always make sure that I’ll be able to watch your stages.”

“Really?”

“Yeah! I tune in to Music Bank, Music Core, and Inkigayo.”

Wooyeon smiles. She stops you at the edge of the railing. The moon is shining on both of you. Then another kiss touches her lips. Like before it is amazing and wondering. Never had a kiss been so good you don’t want to let go. Wooyeon holds your waist to allow you to kiss deeper. Tongues connect and a passion burst.

“Oppa, let’s go to your place.”

“My place? Why?”

“Let’s take this t the next level.”

“Wait…you want to…?”

“Yes, oppa. I think you and I are ready.”

So soon, you ask yourself. You do not want to take advantage of such a girl in your arms. But she is the one who is asking and you do not want to deny her request.

“You live alone?” She asks you.

“Yeah.”

“Then let’s go.”

You hail a taxi then you get into the taxi. You smile with Wooyeon as you give the diver your address. In the back seat, you and Wooyeon start kissing again. Suddenly, she grabs your hand and makes you grope her breast. It is small yet soft. You can already feel her stiff nipples thru her shirt.

Has she been horny all along?”

Once you arrive, you pay the fare and head upstairs to your room. She chuckles as you back hug her and peck her neck in the elevator. It already starts to arouse her a bit as you play with her.

Then you burst into your room. The door swings wide open. Wooyeon crashes her lips onto yours. You have to carry her inside your room. You have to close the door with your foot as you enter your apartment.

Heavy kiss and pants you are breathing out as you move your way to the bedroom. Wooyeon forces you to fall to your bed. She removes her shirt and then her bra. She becomes a ravenous creature that wants sex and only sex.

You insert your hand inside her pants and touch her slit. It is already soaking wet. With your other hand, you unbutton her pants and pull them down to the ground. Now you see a fully naked Wooyeon on top of you. But still, she kisses you. You roll her and make her on the bottom and you are on the top.

You break the kiss and leave her lips and move down to her pussy. Since it is already wet. You already have the idea of inserting your middle finger inside her. First going slowly. You push in and out. As your increase speed, you add your ring finger. You pull out your finger then pussy slap her. She moans as you do that.

You slap her for a second time even louder moan. Then you go back to fingering her. You are so fast that you are so loud and that if anyone was in the room you can hear the juices rub against you and her pink walls. Then again another pussy slap. You repeat this until you see her cum.

She squirts all over your bed. Wooyeon pants ad tries to slow down her breathing. You were intense and now you let go. This allows Wooyeon to recompose herself and rest for a bit.

She looks at you with her messed-up hair. “Why did you stop?”

“Can’t I have my turn?” You undo your pants and reveal your girthy cock.

Wooyeon gets surprises end and covers her eyes. She is shocked to see the large meat you are packing.

“It might hurt. Just get ready.”

Wooyeon bites her lips as you grab hold of her legs. You play with the lips with your tip. Just sliding up and down.

Then here it comes, first, the tip enters. You can see with Wooyeon’s eyes she is experiencing some pain. You exit.

“Wooyeon-ah, you sure you want to do this?”

“Just….let’s do this.”

As the tip enters, you can see how Wooyeon is trying to take it all in. You push in deeper, going all the way. Then You have your cock fully inside her. As you are fully inside Wooyeon, she feels a bit of relief. You aren’t moving but she can feel something massive inside her. You can also feel some bit of pleasure as you are in her.

You start thrusting. First slowly, your cock going in and out of her. Your foreskin is rubbing against her walls. Wooyeon starts moaning in delight. Things go smoothly with the help of the juices of Wooyeon’s pussy. Things are going faster and faster.

You hold on to Wooyeon’s smooth and delicate waist. Each movement feels better than the other. Then your lips collide. You swoop down and start making out. Your arms hold onto her shoulders. Something gentle only what you would want to do to Wooyeon.

Then suddenly, Wooyeon switches positions with you. She turns you over and now she is on top of you, a perfect position for her to start riding you. Her hips move forward, backward, and side to side, like rolling all over your body. She grabs your arms and makes you groper her jiggling breasts.

“Fuck, Wooyeon-ah. How are you so good at riding?”

“I don’t want to say much. But let’s….ugh….say it isn’t my first time.”

“Obviously you aren’t a beginner.”

You sit up once again and start making out. Tongues are connecting. Lips are smacking. A strong lust between a fan and an idol is only something two lovers can have. And are you already lovers?

Wooyeon starts biting you, your lips, cheek then down to your neck, leaving a purple mark on your shoulder. She pushes you once more. Now you are lying on the bed with your pillow on your head and still with your lips locked to each other.

Turned around once more, you move against to get more control. It is back to a more classic missionary position. You thrust again. This time as fast as you can. You thrust too strongly. You and Wooyeon are now screaming in delight. A loud delight fills the room.

“Fucking choke me,” Wooyeon says.

You sit up and grab her neck, strong enough for her to feel it but yet weak enough to make sure she doesn’t pass out. This time as you choke her. You are at your fastest. No when have you ever been this quick when it comes to thrusting even with your past relationships?

“Fuck….Wooyeon. I’m going to cum.” These are the words that are going to mark your orgasm.

“Inside. Do it inside.”

“You…sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure. Just do it.”

Now when you reach your climax, you spew everything in her. Slowly you pump your cock to allow every drop to drip out. Once you are dry, you lay next to her.

“You sure you won’t get pregnant?”

“Actually….oppa….”

You sit up. “You aren’t on the pill?!”

“Yeah…”

“Wooyeon…are you going to be okay?”

“Let me tell you something. Woo!ah! is going to disband soon and this is my retirement plan.”

“Wooyeon-ah, I will take care of you as my wife but you shouldn’t be doing this when you are so young.”

“Well, we just did.”

You hug her close and kiss her on the lips briefly. “I’ll take care of you. We need to get married, have our child, and grow old together.”

“That sounds perfect.”

#Woo!ah! smut #Wooyeon smut #Kpop smut #Park Jinkyung #Jinkyung smut

413 notes · View notes

neitherabaron · 11 months

Text

Less that 24 hours to go before Small Saga drops! So hype.

Things you (yes, you!) should do:

- Go get the game on Steam https://store.steampowered.com/app/1320140/Small_Saga/

- Go follow its dev, Darya Noghani: @sketchylogic here, or @Sketchy_Jeremy on Twitter. Probably other places too!

- Darya was also one of the devs on Avian Attorney, a cool game about birds, lawyers, and lawyers who are birds, so play that!

- Darya let me guest on their soundtrack, which was so cool of them! Go pick up my EP, Rat-Tailed Rover, which has the songs I contributed to the game: https://kofiyoung.bandcamp.com/album/rat-tailed-rover-songs-from-small-saga

- From tomorrow, you can also listen to Rat-Tailed Rover on Spotify, Apple, YouTube…anywhere you get your music streams!

Anyway, thanks for reading and enjoy the game! Sam and I are gonna be playing Small Saga every Monday night on our Twitch, so watch this space!

#small saga #jrpg #rpg #indie games #kofi young #the mechanisms #kofiassam #indie music

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cherrycokedup · 2 months

Note

hiiii!! if you’re still doing the ♫+characters asks, may i ask what songs you’d pick for ♫+will from nevermore and ♫+willspero?? :0 i hope ur having a nice day :)

KISS ME ANON I'VE BEEN WAAAAAITING FOR THIS ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TAKE MY HAND IN MARRIAGE!

ahem anyways! The name of the songs are gonna be highlighted and will link to the song on spotify! + the line that most makes me think of them!

For Will:

Partner in Crime - Madilyn Mei

"You do the talking Sew up my mouth if I can't keep it closed"

Your Protector - Fleet Foxes

"You walk along the stream Your head caught in a waking dream"

Call them Brothers - Regina Spektor

"Over and over they call us their friends Can't we find something else to pretend? Like nobody's won and we're safe at the end"

Life Itself - Glass Animals

"Daddy was dumb, said that I'd be something special Brought me up tough but I was a gentle human"

For Willspero:

Mama's Boy - Dominic Fike

"Half of my heart is in your chest I'm not a mama's boy I'd go see Italy I'd go see Tuscany If you could come with me"

Cold Cold Cold - Cage the Elephant

"Doctor, can you help me 'cause something don't feel right? Something don't feel right Something just ain't right"

Not the Ghost - The Crane Wives

"Escape; we collect mistakes I will carry them home Carry them home"

It will come back - Hozier

"Don't let me in with no intention to keep me Jesus Christ, don't be kind to me Honey, don't feed me, I will come back"

(OOC but self indulgently,) Boyfriend - Dove Cameron "I don't need to tell you twice All the ways he can't suffice If I could give you some advice I would leave with me tonight"

Bonus:

this one line from Trouble by Cage the Elephant

"Everywhere I look, I catch a glimpse of you I said it was love and I did it for life I didn't do it for you"

#I have complex thoughts about each and every one of these songs nd how to it relates to the characters lmaoooooo #they're so aro4aro #“but will is in love with mon-” GET OOOOOOOOOOOOOUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT #nevermore will #nevermore prospero #nevermore webtoon #willspero #im not beating the “ur the willspero guy” allegations haha

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vincentspork · 2 years

Text

You've probably seen this gif at some point if you've been using the internet for a while:

This is from a Korean computer program called D-Player, which was intended to help people learn dance routines. I believe it started off as a wholly free program, but somewhere down the road, the programmers officially partnered with music labels and offered paid content. Ultimately it dwindled into obscurity as streaming video overtook services of this nature, with this program's legacy living on as funny gifs of a little dancing cat, stolen graphics cropping up in karaoke machines, and this everpresent image file persevering all these decades later.

This gif is specifically of the choreography to 클레오 (CLEO)'s "착각" (literally "Illusion"), which, as far as anyone call tell, may have only ever popped up on a few compilations in the group's twilight days, not even seeing the light of day as a physical single or even an album track - so the fact that it's endured, as it were, is fascinating in and of itself. Nobody's even sure if this is the official routine, as no footage seems to exist of the group performing this song.

Anyway, I was curious about CLEO, themselves - they're reportedly one-hit wonders in South Korea. For whatever reason, their 4th (of 5 total) album, their 2004 self-titled, is on Spotify streaming (US). It's almost painfully by the numbers late 90s/early 2000s r&b pop but it's very good. Guy who's only listened to Linnea Handberg - This Is Who I Am (2000) listening to any other mid-noughties pop album: kinda getting some This Is Who I Am vibes from this? Wait the seventh track is like a faster version of Ann Lee's 2 Times. That's amazing

#most of this post was an excuse to infodump about dplayer again. if you somehow couldnt tell #music tag

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louisisalarrie · 4 months

Note

i don’t understand how louis is selling out stadiums, having fans crowd him at airports like during 1d, and just have a big fan base (as i can see on social media), however his listeners are like 2 million? it is so weird?

Hi anon! Demographics, venue capacity, tour legs, time of year to tour, venue availability, recent releases, social media traction, tiktok song plays, stunts, radio play, allllllll that and more obviously have a huge effect on streaming numbers and followers and fan interactions. I feel like this may be a bit longer than you probably wanted, and may also stray a bit, but alas, welcome to the show!

Let’s have a squiz at the numbers between the boys real quick:

Harry

Instagram: 47.2m followers

Engagement Rate: 5.05%

YouTube: 14.7m subscribers

Spotify: 62.4m monthly

Top 5 countries: Brazil, Indonesia, Great Britain, Chile, Australia

Louis

Instagram: 17.8m followers

Engagement Rate: 3.17%

YouTube: 4.39m subscribers

Spotify: 2.8m monthly

Top 5 countries: Indonesia, Mexico, Brazil, Chile, Argentina

Niall

Instagram: 32.4m followers

Engagement Rate: 1.70%

YouTube: 4.63m subscribers

Spotify: 15.1m monthly

Top 5 countries: Australia, Great Britain, Australia, Indonesia, Ireland

Liam

Instagram: 26.4m followers

Engagement Rate: 0.83%

YouTube: 3.73m subscribers

Spotify: 5.1m monthly

Top 5 countries: Australia, Great Britain, Indonesia, Australia, Australia

Zayn

Instagram: 52.3m followers

Engagement Rate: 1.52%

YouTube: 15.7m subscribers

Spotify: 27.2m monthly

Top 5 countries: Indonesia, Brazil, Australia, Great Britain, Australia

———

So, these top 5 countries and numbers, based on very little info that’s not super detailed or anything and like I won’t go into the statistics of everything else because it’s pretty obvious who’s getting radio play etc etc., show the diversity of listeners and followers in their demographic. These top countries fluctuate often, particularly louis’ being mostly in LATAM right now because of his tour there but… don’t you think he’d still have GB on there? He’s not holding any traction there like the others, and has the lowest monthly listens and followers out of them all.

However, his lack of radio play is hugely affecting this. It may seem that radio play is pretty obsolete these days, what with everyone having Bluetooth in their cars and Spotify/youtube on their phones, but it pulls a wider demographic. Hell, we still have a radio monopoly in Aus. But anyway. It’s not dead, and it’s a great way to plug music, and not focus on just streaming services (not that Louis is, he’s been pretty much blacklisted from radio unfortunately).

Radio play encourages folks to search the artist on Spotify and then it builds from there. It’s still crucial in this day and age to diversify the age demographic, and country demographic, of your fanbase.

But look at those numbers… Zayn is slaying at the moment. He’s ahead of Harry in both Instagram and YouTube. Granted, Harry’s been MIA for ages and Zayn is on a promo run with a new release, but he’s just pulling that liiiiittle bit more than Harry. Louis is extremely far behind all of them, only beating out Liam in YouTube, and it just… it breaks my heart. Because Louis’ songs ARE marketable, ARE good for radio, and should be treated as such.

However, have a squiz at that Instagram engagement rate. Louis is just after Harry, and the other boys are far further behind. It makes sense for Louis to have a higher engagement because he’s consistently posting and on tour, but to be THAT far ahead with the LEAST amount of followers? Pretty fucking awesome.

He has a different relationship with fans, far closer than I’ve seen across many artists. He has a community, extremely dedicated and supportive of everything he fucking does. Harry does, but it’s far wider spread. The bigger your fanbase, the more discourse and differing of fan dedication is. It doesn’t feel like a community, whereas Louis’ does, and so it’s nice and cosy for us. But, what comes with this, is a lack of further PR push for bigger and better.

And you’re correct, he’s selling out venues (of an arena capacity 99% of the time) and has a lot of fan interactions and all that, but he’s not diversifying his fanbase. It’s a comfortable, lovely, and reliable group of fans that get him on stage and pay his bills. He doesn’t necessarily need to get bigger, and I don’t really think he’s that fussed right now about it either.

The BEST way to get more fans and more Spotify listens is to interact with other artists, doing collabs, stunting with them, and getting in touch with their fanbase. He’s done a great job with that with AFHF, which is an awesome tactic to do and also clearly something he’s passionate about, but he’s still not hitting the mark quite yet. But he’s grown massively from the beginning of his solo career, and it’s been more steady and picking people up along for the journey, not just dropping them at the show.

He hasn’t stunted in a long time, and hasn’t really interacted with a big name in ages. It’s not always romantic stunts, though. It can truly be about creating and upholding the relationships with other musicians that can really positively boost you in a bigger direction. No other artist is really vouching for him or posting “hey my mate louis just dropped a live album!” or “Louis is hosting a music festival what a sick lad!” ya know? Or even a selfie or attending one of his shows or anything at all. Niall is carrying on with Shawn and Lewis and having fun with it and being silly and the general public, and other fanbases who’ve never even heard of Louis, aren’t seeing the side to him that we see and love.

His stage show also, is absolutely sick. We love it, and the barrier run is something Harry simply can’t do, but it provides just that more of an artist to fan relationship. Harry kills it with the banter, dedicates entire parts of his shows to have chats with the audience, says outrageous shit and wears outrageous things, and makes a statement. Louis isn’t doing anything like that that would break the internet right now. His songs and funny quotes aren’t being used on tiktok like they are with Harry. He’s not reaching a larger crowd and I really, unfortunately, don’t think he will (to a massive scale, at least) without doing something big, a stunt beginning or ending, or if he keeps building a solid fanbase who he likes to connect with, interacting with other artists.

He seems to be in his own little Louis world right now, our Louis world, and we love him for that. Of course we do. He’s built a steady and dedicated long lasting relationship with us, but yeah.. he’s not making headlines, radio play, or getting the GPs attention. It fucking sucks, but it is what it is at the moment, and I hope it changes for him because I would LOVE nothing more than to see him sell out stadiums worldwide and be the best he can be.

But he’s just doing what he loves right now, and I don’t think him or his media team are really all that fussed on pushing to a wider audience because it involves things that he probably doesn’t wanna do. He’ll take a break after this tour (heartbreaking) but he’ll need to push to get back on the ground after HS4 drops because that’s gonna dominate the charts again. Right now, during this tour without the shadow of Harry, was the time to be making headlines. But he’s happy, and we’re happy, so so be it.

Anyway, this turned into a shit show of marketing and me probably repeating myself 16783890 times, but his strategy at the moment doesn’t seem to be rushing to top the charts (even tho he’s blacklisted too which doesn’t help) to rapidly grow his fanbase, it’s just to spend time with us and enjoy tour.

At the end of the day, dedication and the Artist to Fan relationship are the most CRUCIAL things an artist can have. And Spotify and follower numbers don’t mean shit.

Once more, he’ll pick up people to the way to the show, and not just drop them off.

I’m exhausted now LOL. thanks anon!

#anon #answered #I haven’t read back through this so apologies hahahahha

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unloneliest · 10 months

Text

my tmg song sorters are once again up to date! you can find them all under the cut. i added a total of 5 new song sorters this year, as well as an album sorter that's comprehensive of all of the mountain goats' releases, not just what's on streaming!

the rest of the sorters include only what's on spotify, but with each new (old) addition to streaming, it's looking like making the jump to a more comprehensive sorter situation is going to be easier and easier!

if you attempt the all spotify songs sorter, i’d recommend using a computer to do so - it takes a very long time to do & will sometimes refresh on mobile browsers, which starts you over from the beginning.

anyways! hope yall enjoy ^_^ let me know what you think! post your results and tag me! etc!

GENERAL:

all spotify songs

album sorter (just what’s on spotify)

album sorter (all albums)

songs released on eps/exclusively as singles (spotify playlist)

MERGE:

jenny from thebes

the jordan lake sessions 5

bleed out

the jordan lake sessions 3-4

dark in here

the jordan lake sessions 1-2

getting into knives

songs for pierre chuvin

in league with dragons

goths

beat the champ

transcendental youth

all eternals deck

4AD:

the life of the world to come

heretic pride

get lonely

the sunset tree

zopilote machine

we shall all be healed

tallahassee

LOFI:

all hail west texas

devil in the shortwave

jam eater blues

the coroner’s gambit

isopanisad radio hour

new asian cinema

full force galesburg

nothing for juice

nine black poppies

sweden

beautiful rat sunset

bitter melon farm

ghana

protein source of the future… now!

...

possible future changes:

adjusting the comprehensive song sorter to be in the same order as my all tmg in chronological order playlist on spotify, & linking it

including the EPs that were compiled in to ghana/protein source/melon farm as their own separate sorters

separating EPs and albums more fully in my lists of sorters & in the album sorters i've created

including EPs and albums not (yet?) on streaming

including unreleased and live only songs? pros: people can have a tool that helps people who've heard them before in figuring out their favorite mountain goats songs. cons: removes new fans' need to go searching for unheard gems, & that's a huge part of the enjoyment

#the mountain goats #tmg #jenny from thebes #new asian cinema #devil in the shortwave #isopanisad radio hour #jam eater blues #jam posts #listen. it drives me nuts to be lumping all lo-fi together but until i break down the compilations into their component parts it just makes #sense in terms of functionality. sadly #tmg posting

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askinkiskarma · 2 years

Text

The Archer | Chapter VIII: Bigger Than The Whole Sky

Chapter I Chapter II Chapter III Chapter IV Chapter V Chapter VI Chapter VII Chapter VIII Chapter IX Chapter X

Summary: As you try everything in your power to bring Neteyam back to life, he gets everything he's ever wanted in Eywa.

Pairings: Neteyam x Avatar!Reader

Word Count: 11,5k words

Warnings/notes (please proceed with caution, some of the topics might be sensitive/triggering): angst (lots and lots of angst), death, blood, violence, cursing, mildly suggestive content (18+, minors DNI), spoilers (!!) for ATWOW

A/N: i am sick and i am so so so sorry - IT HAD TO BE DONE OK?!

This was supposed to be the last chapter, but i quickly realised as i was writing it that there was no way I could reasonably end the series the way I wanted to this way - so two chapters it is. This took everything out of me honestly, but i put so much love and effort into this series, into the laws and the lore I have created, and I hope it comes across this way. I have spent an obscene amount of time trying to piece it all together, make everything consistent within the story I have already told, and I am proud of the way everything is shaping up. Now, this chapter WILL HURT and I am so sorry, but I PROMISE you all you will not be disappointed with the ending, and I will give EVERY character the ending they deserve, bc i love them all so much and they deserve to be happy.

Anyway, I'll stop rambling but i'd love to chat more about it and elaborate my thoughts and reasonings so let's chat in the replies/asks baby boys, gals and non-binary pals <3 ILY all so much xoxoxo

↳ *Spotify playlist* ༉‧₊˚✧

No words appear before me in the aftermath Salt streams out my eyes and into my ears Every single thing I touch becomes sick with sadness 'Cause it's all over now, all out to sea

“Where are your sisters?”

Jake’s voice registered weakly in your ears, just like the muffled cries around you and Neytiri’s haunting wails. The tears that fell from your eyes were dried up and gone in the wind, like the rest of your being was. Empty. Soulless. Dead.

“YOUR SISTERS, WHERE ARE THEY?”

“I don’t know.”

Lo’ak’s voice sounded tired. So tired. You were all tired. Tired of this world, tired of the pain that never ever seemed to cease, that never ever wanted to relent. Your blurred dizzy vision moved to your hands, red and sticky, coated in Neteyam’s warm blood. You looked at Lo’ak, whose hands looked similar to yours. Fitting, you thought. His blood was on your hands. You were responsible for this. He wanted to leave. He wanted to get the fuck out of the ship, like you should have done. You made him come. And because of you, your dad was dead, your mate was dead. Your dad was a trained soldier, one of the best that has ever existed. Why in Eywa’s name would you ever think he needed you? If you hadn’t been there, they would have probably escaped the ship easier, quicker, and you would be all finishing the rest of the humans instead of trying to figure out how you were ever going to survive this, how you were supposed to exist in a world Neteyam didn’t, how you were going to make quick work of your damned, void soul.

Your mind went to the book, the book that you took with you to this new life as you carried it in your own, the book whose every memorable quote reminded you of him, that felt so appropriate now, all the words were swimming scattered through every crevice of your being.

“If all else perished, and he remained, I should still continue to be; and if all else remained, and he were annihilated, the universe would turn to a mighty stranger.”

“Be with me always - take any form - drive me mad! only do not leave me in this abyss, where I cannot find you! Oh, God! it is unutterable! I can not live without my life! I can not live without my soul!”

“I have to remind myself to breathe -- almost to remind my heart to beat!”

“Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same.”

“Nelly, I am Heathcliff - he's always, always in my mind - not as a pleasure, any more then I am always a pleasure to myself - but, as my own being.”

It truly seems you couldn’t stop ruining everything you touched. It seems no matter what body your mind was in, no matter whether in the forest or at sea, no matter a child or a full grown adult, no matter broken or seemingly healed, everything you touched just turned to ashes. Everything, everyone that dared to get close to you was bound to be lost in the abyss forever.

“WHERE ARE THEY?”

“They’re on the ship. They are tied up on the ship.”

“Yeah, they’re at the moon pool. Come on, I’ll show you.”

All the voices were distant, broken, like a messed up radio, you could only pick up words, only sounds that your brain was working hard to try to piece together. You didn’t know who was speaking, your every sense focused on Neteyam, on his eyes, still open, that will haunt you forever, for the rest of your measly, torn-apart life.

You noticed Jake come to you, taking you by the shoulders and shaking you. He did the same to Neytiri.

“Kid, come on. Let’s go. We gotta go.” When he saw how unresponsive you are, that your eyes barely looked more alive than your mate’s, that all you could muster was a barely visible shake of head, he let you go.

“Listen to me, listen to me.” He could barely speak, could be barely heard over the stirring, painful cries continuously escaping Neytiri’s mouth, yet another thing you will never be able to forget as long as you live. You have never heard anything like it, never thought it was possible for such sounds to escape another being, never thought a wordless evocation could say so much, could say everything words couldn’t.

“They have our daughters. They have our daughters. I need you with me. And I need you to be strong. Right now, strong heart. Strong heart.”

Silence enveloped the space around you, just like the darkness that came with the eclipse, and you were happy, happy for your mind to be able to focus on what it needed to, what it had to.

“Let’s go get our daughters.”

“You stay with your brother.”

“No, dad, I want to go with you.”

“You’ve done enough.”

“No, dad…”

Neteyam woke up dazed, lavender haze surrounding him until his vision finally focused, and he was able to see the periwinkle glow for what it was: bioluminescent flora. Different than the one he’s been forced to get used to the past few months - better. Because this beauty all around him was in a place he knew and loved so much, that will always be his favourite place in the world. Your clearing, back in the Omatikaya forest. How was he here? He couldn’t remember what happened, couldn’t remember a single thing from before a few seconds ago, but he took a moment to revel in being back home. He has not said it to anyone, not even you, but as much as he has enjoyed the reef, enjoyed the peace that came with being far away from humans, within the Metkayina clan, Neteyam deeply missed his home. He’s wanted to speak about it to you, but couldn’t - not when he knew how much you have also been struggling with it, how much you also missed this place, not when there was nothing to be done anyway. They couldn’t come back, as much was clear, while the humans hunted them so ferociously, while the clan could suffer as a consequence.

This place was slightly different than he remembered, Neteyam mused, and he realises it is because he has very rarely seen it after eclipse. You both usually came here during the day, as dangers hid in the shadow of the night, dangers he wouldn’t be willing to risk encountering, not with you around. He slowly, deliberately, enjoying every step, every sensation, every sound, made his way to the middle of the clearing, where the river trickled serenely, and he couldn’t help kneel next to it and put one hand in the water, palm against the current. He stood like this for a while, reminiscing about all the memories you have made here and how happy he was to be able to feel this again.

“Neteyam, wait uuup!”

“You have to be faster than that if you ever want to catch me!”

“I don’t want to catch you, I just want to catch up with you!”

Neteyam laughed at the tiny 8 year old girl with bouncing hair and starry eyes, ears pushed back and tails swinging rapidly from one side to the other in happiness at seeing her running towards him, a small pout on her pink lips and an annoyed figure on her face. The little boy kneeled to the ground and opened his much bigger arms wide and she ran straight into him, almost knocking him over at the force of the impact. He wondered if it hurt her. He was always worried about her, she was so so small.

“You caught me.”

“Woah! What is this place?”

Neteyam took in your awed, amazed expression and turned around slowly and was speechless at the beauty of this place, this little corner of Pandora that seemed untouched, that seemed no one else has ever set foot in it before you two.

“It’s heaven!!”

“What’s heaven?” You spoke English most of the time, although you knew Na’vi as well, but a lot of the words you spoke were new to Neteyam - he was a fast learner, though, and he loved it when you explained anything to him. It was better than when the scientists did, except auntie Jo. He loved auntie Jo.

“It’s where good people go after they die, at least that’s what mummy said about Earth people.”

Neteyam shook his head minutely. “No, people go with Eywa after they die! Everybody knows that!”

“So, maybe Heaven is where Eywa is?”

You both thought about it a long time, focused expressions on both your faces.

“That sounds about right! But why is it here?”

You thought about that for a while too. “I think Heaven looks different for different people. But this can be our heaven! Yours and mine!”

“Just you and me?”

“Just you and me.”

Neteyam liked the idea of that, that there would be a place for only you two, for the rest of time.

Neteyam’s attention shifted back from his own little world into this one, although it barely felt like anything changed, as two little kids ran straight into the clearing, a little human girl chasing a blue boy. Why was his mind making him see the same thing twice, why was this all so real, it was like it was taken from his imagination and placed into the physical world?

“Kalin, wait uuup! I’m smaller than you and I have tiny legs! You are being mean, brother!”

Kalin? Brother?

“Tsy, you’re the one that asked me to not go easy on you.”

“Well, that’s what mother told me to say. She said it’s called feminism.”

“What’s feminism?”

“What do I know? I’m six.”

Neteyam was taken aback at the interaction, and at these kids that he has never seen before, whose names didn’t sound familiar to him at all. And the little girl… there’s no other human children on Pandora, haven’t been since… well, you. Could they be new children the humans brought with them? But the scientists always said the reason Spider wasn’t sent back was because you cannot put babies in the contraptions humans used to travel. He sat there, unmoving, just taking it all in, studying these two children carefully, with intense curiosity. His eyes widened and mouth opened before he even realised, as he observed the girl more carefully. She was human… but she had white freckles, freckles like all the Na’vi did… and she had a queue. A queue…

Her hair was dark and thick, braided and ornate, with beads and feathers, and her eyes, they were yellow, like his, but the shape, just like the shape of her nose and mouth… she looked like you. The boy was taller and blue, like he was, but his eyes and nose looked… human, nothing like a Na’vi, and Neteyam was reminded a lot of Kiri, how she looked even more human than an Avatar. As he was laughing at his little sister, Neteyam saw the boy… Kalin, was it? He didn’t have fangs, either. His hair was long and wavy, a different colour than the rest of the Na’vi had, and he was wearing it down, flowing gently and glowing in the sun.

Neteyam’s heart was about to explode out of his chest as the realisation slowly hit him, and as he shifted a little towards them, struggling to keep himself steady on the ground, the sounds his body made attracted the attention of the two little beings in front of him, who both gasped loudly and smiled widely at his presence.

“DADDY! YOU’RE HERE!”

They both ran with all their might straight into his body, which - at the contact as well as the overwhelming feelings that enveloped him whole - fell straight to the ground with a loud thud, and which Kalin and Tsyeym started attacking mercilessly with tickles and kisses.

“WE MISSED YOU, DAD!”

No. No. No.

This couldn’t be it. This couldn’t be the end.

You felt like you just woke up, like your brain rewired and restarted. What the fuck were you doing? You were a medic. You were a scientist. You had a fucking medical bag full of supplies and equipment and so much shit you worked so hard to learn to use, to bring here with you. And you were just going to let your mate die? Without even trying? No. No fucking way.

You got up from the ground, like the ground burned you, and ran to Neyn, where you picked up the large bag that always resided on her, and moved it next to Neteyam’s body. You pushed away the tears forming silently at his unmoving form, trying not to dwell on it too much. He’s just sleeping. He’s just sleeping. Your mate, your best friend and the love of your life, the man you hoped would be the father of your children one day, he’s just sleeping.

You searched the bag, hurried and crazed, and found the strips of gauze you were looking for. You removed them from their sterile wrappings and screamed at Tsireya, who was looking at you panicked, not understand what was happening. You cringed a little at her face, a crying, blubbering mess, and tried to push the thoughts out of your mind. He’s just sleeping. Just sleeping. You looked around for Lo’ak, or Jake, or anyone else, but they were all gone. Where was Lo’ak? Where did he go again? You needed him and he was gone. You growled loudly, but didn’t say anything else on the subject, turning your full attention to Tsireya.

“I need you to help me keep him upright for a while, I need to bandage his wounds. Can you do that?”

She was confused, the emotion very obvious on her face. “Y-yes, I can, but… but… he’s d-“

“Tsireya.” You hissed lowly, fangs barring menacingly. He was sleeping. Just sleeping. “Can you help me or not?”

She nodded furiously, and you knew she would help in any way she could. She was a good kid. She’ll make a good Tsa’hik one day.

“Alright.” You helped her bring his torso up, and you waited for her to rearrange so that she could keep his much larger body in the position you needed her to. You grabbed the large bandage and rolled it around his body, tying it as tightly as you possibly could, cursing under your breath that no one else was here, knowing that Jake could have tightened it better than you could. You needed as much pressure as possible, needed the wounds to stop bleeding. You were trying not to think about how much blood he’s already lost. All that mattered at the moment was that his heart started beating again. You were the same blood type, you could give him blood, but all the blood in the world wouldn’t do anything without a heart to pump it through his body.

Once you were happy with how wrapped his body was, you motioned for Tsireya to lay him back on the ground, which she did, slowly and carefully - which you appreciated. You straddled him, knees on either side of his abdomen and placed the heel of your hand over his chest. You placed your other hand on top of the first, and intertwined your fingers together, starting to pump his chest rhythmically, putting all your effort into it.

“Tsireya, I need you to look in the bag and find a red little case, like a basket. When you find it, bring it to me, fast.”

She took off immediately, ready and committed to do whatever it took to help. You continued the CPR, not stopping for a second, mind running a thousand miles a minute. The fight or flight finally overtook you, and you knew now you would do whatever it took to bring Neteyam back. Because you had to. Because there was no other option. Because you have both suffered enough. You deserved a soft epilogue. You were both good people, and you suffered enough.*

“Here it is!” She brought it next to you, flinging it from side to side in front of your face.

“Good. Now I need you to open it, you see that string? That’s called a zipper. Just pull on it and it should come apart in two.”

Once she did that, you saw the defibrillator come into view and you sighed a small breath of relief. You were exhausted, sweat dripping from your forehead and onto Neteyam’s chest.

“I need you to put this on him. I will walk you through it, I will tell you what to do, but you have to do it, do you understand me?”

She looked uncomfortably from side to side. “B-but, I.. you should do it.”

“I can’t do it, Tsireya. Please. I know this it strange to you, and new and unnatural, and I am sorry, but I need to do this. We need to do this.” You let out a pained cry. “I need to save him. I can save him.”

Your voice rang in the forest all around him, surrounding the meadow and filling his ears, hauntingly beautiful and serene, and he was overwhelmed at the voice, that he missed so much, that he felt like he was just hearing for the first time.

Where the North wind meets the sea

There's a river full of memory

Sleep, my darling, safe and sound

For in this river, all is found

Neteyam struggled to understand what was going on, but, as he was being tackled by the children that just called him dad, the children that bore a striking resemblance to both you and him, he allowed himself to be pushed to the ground and he felt his heart swell to twice its size at the feeling of warmth that enveloped him. As he tightened his arms around the little boy and girl, he realises he knows them. He knows them, has known them every moment of their lives. He has loved them every moment of their lives.

“Parultsyìp! (Children!)”

Memories flooded his being, of your beautiful body, now a bit bigger than he remembered, caressing your pregnant belly tenderly as he placed small kisses all over it; you laughed loudly as the action made you ticklish, and brought your hand to the back of his head, patting him gently, playing with his braids. Memories of Kalin being born, a strange sight, seeing the blue baby come out of his very human mate, but the happiest day of his life. Memories of Mo’at telling you you’re pregnant again, and the shock that overtook you both, then the immense joy that followed seeing his baby girl for the first time, so tiny and absolutely perfect. The first communion with Eywa, their pocket-sized queues connecting to the Spirit Tree, the whole tribe and the scientists, all there to celebrate the Olo’eyktan and Tsakarem, as well as their new happy family. Putting them to sleep every night, neither of them able to slumber without hearing your voice singing softly in their ears. The years passing, but not the passion and love you shared, still obsessed with each other, still going at it like crazed teenagers, like you did ever since you first mated. Images of Lo’ak being the best uncle, and Neteyam having panic attacks every time he would twist and throw his kids in the air like they were helicopter propellers. His mother and father both holding each one of the kids in their arms, cooing and rocking them softly, crying when Tsy wrapped her tiny hand around his mother’s pinky. Kalin’s first word, sweets, since that was what you always called him, and Tsyeym’s, fuck, curtesy of Lo’ak and Spider’s babysitting, which Neteyam prohibited afterwards, and although you tried to hide it - you found it a little funny. All of these things and more, 8 years of memories, of love and care, of adoration and awe, all overwhelming, all pulsating through Neteyam’s mind like electrical shocks, waking him like from a nightmare.

“Neteyam?”

When his amber eyes reopened, the kids were gone, much to his dismay, but he was comforted by the sight of you, his beautiful love, his beautiful light.

“Atan!”

Your human face looked scared, and confused, and sad, but Neteyam couldn’t care less, not when he felt like he hasn’t seen you in a lifetime, not when the only thing he wanted to do was kiss you, like Dean kissed Rory in that episode of Gilmore Girls you loved. He didn’t think twice about your size, about how in your human body, you were as tall as a Na’vi girl, how even in the forest, your face was unencumbered by the weight of your oxygen mask. He didn’t think of anything, because none of it matter outside of you, outside of you and him and the love you shared.

He ran to you, watching as every step made the ground glow in lustrous pastel colours and he smiled as he picked you up by your thighs and lifted you, pushing you to the tree your body was close to until your back hit it and you wrapped your legs around his hips. Your hands found his face and hair, like they always did, and your body melted into him, slowly relaxing, giving him a dazzling smile that took his breath away.

“Hi.”

“Hi, Atan.”

The kiss was everything he needed and more, more than he could ever dream in this life and the next and everything that came after. It was hot and needy and desperate, and you were clinging to each other like you never wanted to let go, and he’d be damned if he ever would again.

Tsireya took a look at your disheveled figure, putting all your effort into your chest compressions, and she nodded, determination overtaking any other emotion on her face.

“Tell me what to do.”

“Alright. In the pouch, there is the little device with a human drawn on it. You see that blue lever, just pull on it, until the cover comes off.”

She did as she was told, and let out an excited yelp when what you told her would happen, happened.

“I did it!”

“That’s great, Tsireya. Now, inside, there are two pieces of… paper… yes, that’s right. I need you to look at the drawing on them, and remove the yellow film that is on them, and put the white strips on Neteyam’s body, exactly how it shows you in the picture. Make sure you press them down properly.”

She manoeuvred around you so she can do what you told her, and eventually, the pads were on. It was up to the little contraption to do its job now. Neteyam’s life was in its tiny, inanimate hands.

“Neteyam, stop.”

“No, Atan, I can’t stop. I need you, I need you so badly.”

Neteyam felt you push him away, the same expression as earlier marring your beautiful face. You looked…scared.

“Neteyam, why are you here?”

“What do you mean?”

“Fuck… if you’re here… that means… Shit.”

Neteyam watched as you removed yourself from him, and no matter how disappointed, he helped put you back onto the ground. You put distance in between you, which Neteyam dreaded, and you were pacing around, seemingly out of your mind with worry.

“No… it can’t be.”

“What is going on, Atan? You’re scaring me.”

“Neteyam, you can’t be here. You have to go. What is the last thing you remember?”

Neteyam thought long and hard about it. Nothing… he couldn’t remember anything. He can remember moving to the Metkayina, and learning to swim. He can remember the beauty of the reef, he can remember you, hair blowing gracefully in the humid wind as you took to the new culture, he can remember a magical celebration where people danced and sang. That’s about it.

“I can’t remember much… I just woke up here, back home. I walked through the clearing and saw our kids. Our kids, Atan! They are so beautiful, they look so much like both of us. They look exactly like what I imagined them to ever since I fell in love with you! I can’t believe I’m back home, I can’t believe this is happening. I thought I’d never be back here.”

Your mouth fell slightly agape, looking somewhere behind him, and you looked like you were trying to process everything he was telling you.

“…Kids… Our kids… you saw our kids?”

“Yes, they were right there, laughing and chasing each other, just like we used to do, in the exact place we used to. It’s everything I have ever wanted, ever since the moment I knew how deeply and irrevocably in love with you I was, all I wanted was this. That moment right there, this moment right here.”

Neteyam saw your lips quiver, trembling trying to keep in the tears that were threatening to spill out. Your brows were furrowed and you were looking at him in disbelief, like nothing about this made sense, like what he was feeling was wrong, and Neteyam couldn’t understand. He was finally home. You finally guided him home.

You closed the distance in between you and pulled him into a hug, a tight hug that he immediately reciprocated.

“I love you so much. I have missed you so much.” You were sobbing in his chest now, hot tears trickling down his torso.

“But I need you to try to remember. You have to remember.”

Neteyam’s words caught in his throat as a loud boom almost knocked him to the ground, shaking the whole clearing, and he found it hard keeping upright. His first instinct, as it always was, was to shield you, so he grabbed your body in his and pushed you to the ground, towering over you with his body.

“What is happening?”

The world was losing focus around him, the edges of the clearing blurred and disappearing slowly from view.

“Atan, what is happening?”

You looked at him, eyes wide and he saw you shaking your head almost imperceptibly, biting on the inside of your lip aggressively. He brought his hand up to your face and caressed your lips softly with his thumb, tugging a little so you stopped hurting yourself.

“What is it, Atan? What can’t you tell me? Why am I here? Why are we here?”

“I’m here for you, Neteyam. You have to remember.”

Neteyam was trying so hard, thinking so hard whilst the world was seemingly falling apart around him, around you both, and the only thing he could think of, the only think he knew, is that he didn’t want to leave you. He didn’t want to leave the meadow, or the kids. He was home, finally. He could finally live.

“I will try to remember, Atan. I am not leaving you, I am not going anywhere. I will protect you and the kids. We’re never going to be apart again.”

You seemed pained at his words, but said no more as another quake shook the ground you were laying on.

You watched as Neteyam’s body jerked violently for a second time, with no response. The deep fear and anguish, the dark thoughts were slowly creeping up on you again, as your mate wasn’t coming back to life, and it seemed again all efforts, all your hope was easily being dragged out to sea, out into the abyss, along your sanity and future.

“Please, please fuck! Please, just work. Goddamn it!”

You continued CPR in between shocks, praying, begging Eywa for a chance. Please, Great Mother, you can’t do this. I’m begging you, please. Please!

Beep. Beep. Beep.

As you felt his heart beating in his chest again and heard it on the AED, you felt as if yours started beating again too. You stopped the chest compressions and moved your head close to his face, trying to see if he was breathing. A soft, subtle puff of air was being released from his nose every couple of seconds and you saw in shock as wet drips were falling on his beautiful, ethereal face.

Acid rain leaking from your eyes, pouring like tropical storms, never-ending, all-powerful and you couldn’t stop, couldn’t make them stop. You were wailing, crying harder than you ever have before as the man you loved came back from the dead, as his heartbeat was weak, but nevertheless present on your fingertips that were pushing against his throat, as your other hand went to his cheek that you caressed, trying to figure out if this was real, if he was really back. Your wails were so loud they were hurting your ears, but you couldn’t stop, you couldn’t make yourself stop, all you felt was enormous, earth-shattering grief, all the sorrow you suppressed flooding all of your senses, clouding your mind, pushing anything else down, melting it into the ground. The ache was coursing through your veins, poisoning every cell in your body until the was nothing left but this - it. You should be happy, you should be relieved, but as you watched the man you have known, you have loved every single day of your unpredictable, crazy, mercurial life, you realised how close he was, how close you were to losing him forever, to losing everything that kept you sane, kept you going.

You saw it all: washing his dead body, preparing him for the funeral, removing his bracelet, the bracelet that signified your love and your bond, the family dressed in mournful garbs, having to let him go, giving his body to the ocean, having to sing his songcord one last time, never being able to see him again, only having to settle for scraps, for a memory, or for a vision at the Spirit Tree. You saw yourself, a widow forever, never being able to move on, never being able to be happy, ever again, because he was happiness, and he was everything and he was gone. You saw your future - never having children, because if they weren’t his - what was the point? You saw his family, ruptured and torn apart by the loss of their son, their sibling, their hero, their best friend. You saw Lo’ak, carrying the guilt for the rest of his life, rebelling against his father, going on a dark path it was near impossible to turn him back from. You saw Neytiri, broken after another loss, the worst loss a mother could ever feel, never fully recovering, never truly being the same again. You saw Tuk and Kiri withdraw into themselves, the light they carried with them everywhere they went snuffed out at the calamitous loss. You saw it all and it killed you, it gutted you from the inside out.

But he was here. He was still here. Everything you saw, every nightmare your mind made you watch, laughing as you suffered, revelling in it, like it always was, it was just that - a nightmare. A parallel universe you never had to live through. Because he was here. He’s just sleeping.

You knew you didn’t have time to waste. You had to go back, you had to warm his body and clean his wounds, you had to remove any scraps the bullet left behind in his organs, you had to give him blood. There was still too much to do, and he needed you. You didn’t have time to fully fall apart just yet.

“Tsireya, we need to take him back to the village, we need to go, now. Just help me put him on Neyn, please.”

“I…I’ve never been on an Ikran before.”

If you weren’t so dazed and out-of-your-mind, you would have scoffed at that.

“Oh, I think you have, too.”

You didn’t have to look at the Metkayina girl to feel the embarrassment in her cheeks and her tail swish vigorously.

“I’ll make sure your parents know this is the first time, ok? I’m a great liar. Just please get on.”

Between the two of you, you managed to place Neteyam’s still unmoving, still unconscious body on your beautiful banshee, and you all got on, trying your best to cage his body so that he wouldn’t fall.

“I’ll tell her to go slow and steady, just hold on to her kuru (queue) and you’ll be fine.”

Ok, sweet girl. We have to get back. Please go gently. Hurry.

Neyn trilled in your direction, and you can tell she was worried and stressed through the bond. You didn’t know if it was just a mirror of your own mind or if she was feeling it too. Neyn loved Neteyam. He was always nice to her, and considerate and attentive. Neyn also loved Seze, and the thought of Seze being without her chosen Na’vi, being alone, the rest of her life, hurt Neyn. It hurt you, too. It hurt you so badly, in fact, your body was convulsing slightly, pain deep within your abdomen, that almost made your ikran lose her focus, and she wobbled a little midair, which made Tsireya scream.

“It’s alright, you’re ok. We’re ok.”

You rushed to your marui as soon as Neyn landed and you saw Seze make her way to you as well. Poor girl. You and Neteyam might not have a spirit brother like Lo’ak now did, but these two, they were it for you. You and Neteyam had a bond with your ikran that transcended time, space and species, and you would never be able to replace them, as long as you lived.

The first thing you needed was blood. He needed blood. You got out an empty blood bag and the tube, as well as a needle and syringe. You’d have to work fast, and you’d have to operate on him while the blood was being withdrawn, which will hurt, but you had to take the risk, he didn’t have much time.

“Tsireya, listen to me. I need to give Neteyam blood. My blood. I need you to take that little ribbon and tighten it around my arm, below my bracelet. It needs to be so tight it hurts, do you understand? When I tell you, you need to remove it. Then, as soon as I put the needle in and the blood starts flowing, we will need to clean him and I will patch him up, ok?”

Tsireya looked lost and trembling, her bottom lip quivering uncontrollably, but she nodded meekly, looking around at all the things she did not understand or know, deep panic on her features.

“Good girl.” As soon as she did what you asked, you found a vein and watched as deep, violent red liquid flowed softly from your body to the bag. The Metkayina girl gasped, but said nothing, just looking at the blood like in a trance, removing the tourniquet when you told her.

“It’s ok. This will help him. But we need to hurry. It takes about ten minutes for it to fill, maybe a bit longer since I will be using my arm at the same time.”

You got to work immediately, cleaning and disinfecting the area where he lay, prepping all of your tools and asking Tsireya to be your scrub nurse for the day. You cleaned his body, bloodied and bruised, trying to not focus on how it was making you nauseous, making your mind sick and dizzy with worry and pain, and you knew you shouldn’t be doing this. You were too emotionally involved to be the one doing this, but there was no one else. Not Norm, not Max. Not Claire, or Tim, no one else. You took the scalpel and made a cut into his skin, asking Tsireya to cauterise wherever she saw bleeds. She was naturally good at this, you noted and you smiled at this girl who has only known you and Neteyam for a few months and yet here she was, crying and shaking, doing everything in her power to save your family from harm. You knew Lo’ak was a big reason for it, but not the only reason. You really liked her.

You diligently removed all the shards and shrapnel the bullet left behind, and sutured every layer until his back was patched up. Somehow, the bullet missed his heart, and the main arteries, which you felt was Eywa’s doing. It had to be. Eywa wanted him to live, she had to. Because this wasn’t balance. Nothing about your lives has ever been balanced, and it would take a lot of good to equilibrate all the fucked up shit both you and him, your entire family has been through. So Neteyam had to live.

Once the blood bag was full, you removed the needle from your body and got up, realising quickly you shouldn’t be standing up, falling to the ground with a thud. Shit. You once again had to turn to Tsireya for help, and she managed to hang the bag somewhere above you, so that the liquid could flow freely into Neteyam’s body. You waited until you turned him chest up, and then inserted the needle, allowing the blood to move through his now beating heart. Your blood. Your blood ran through his body, through his heart. Your blood will save him, like your hands did, like your body had to. You were about to collapse after losing so much, but knowing you were the reason he was still here empowered you. It was just you and him. Just you and him, in this whole world, for the rest of time.

It was hard having to turn him upside down without disturbing him or hurting him further, but eventually you and Tsireya managed to, and you did the same procedure on his chest, until that was also completely closed and clean. Your hands were trembling, and your suture ruptured a few times in his body, and it took every ounce of self-restrain you had to not cry, not to collapse in a puddle on the floor, to not scream in agony, not ask the Universe what the hell could you have ever done to deserve going through all of this? Nobody should have to go through having to lose a dad and a mate in one day, no one should have to fight tooth and nail to keep them from crossing to the other side, to patch their brokenness, whilst yours flourished and bloomed like deadly nightshade. You had to endure more in 19 years than most people do in their lives, more grief embellished your being than there were beads adorning Na’vi bodies. You were feeling sorry for yourself, and for once in your life, you didn’t want to stop, you didn’t want to have to pull yourself back together, you didn’t want to be strong anymore. You were tired.

When you finished, you were spent, hours upon hours passing you by. You felt pain in your body everywhere, kicking at your insides like a monster waiting to crawl out of you with every push. You were cramping and the whole world turned around you, and you knew you were going to pass out from exhaustion. You went to your mat, anxiety enveloping you in knowing there was nothing else you could possibly do for Neteyam at the moment, and called for your turquoise friend.

“Tsireya, when…if… the family gets back, you tell them they need to call Norm and Max. Tell them they need to get here as soon as possible. I can’t do this by myself.” You felt the world dissolving before you as you spoke, and allowed it to fully dissipate away from view, embracing the feeling of nothingness, because nothing meant no pain, and no images of your dead mate, and your dead dad, and you were happy with that.

You woke up in a daze, faintly recognising the slur of voices blending together into one indistinctive blabber, that you tried with your whole might to decipher. You tried to open your eyes, but they were so heavy it felt like lifting weights back in the lab complex as a human. Eventually, your senses recovered and you were able to both see and hear the Sullys, as well as Norm and Max chatting to each other, huddled over Neteyam’s body.

“She’s awake!” Tuk’s voice startled you, and seeing her approaching you excitedly tugged at your heart. My Tuk-tuk…

“Oh, Great Mother, thank you! Ma ‘ite!” Neytiri crouched next to your limp body and hugged you, and you winced as every part of you she was touching hurt. You saw scratches and bruises all over your body from the battle, that you were too preoccupied to notice before.

“Sa’nok.” She sobbed in your chest, releasing all the anguish of thinking she has lost two kids in one night. “I’m ok, sa’nok. I’m here.”

“You saved him! You saved him, I thought we lost him! I thought I lost him!” Her cries were ringing painfully in your ear, the sadness in them close to tearing you apart.

“Is he…?”

Jake came over and kneeled next to you, tears in his own eyes. The whole family looked exhausted, spent, physically and mentally, and you counted them quickly, sighing deeply when you found them all to be here, in the tent.

“He’s still asleep, kid. What happened?”

“I should ask you the same thing.”

You moved next to Neteyam, holding his hand, just needing to feel him, and his now much stronger pulse, and spent the next while explaining everything you have had to do and watched as their mouths got progressively more agape in shock. Then they watched yours do the same as Jake told you what happened on the ship.

“He’s dead, kid. He’s finally dead. Whatever else happens, at least Quaritch will never haunt this family ever again.”

Your eyes immediately moved to Spider, and you felt a tinge of sadness for the boy who also had to lose his father, just like you have. No matter what, no matter what atrocities this man committed, you knew better than most than the love doesn’t go away, it runs deep and the water of an underwater cavern, hidden from view and light, but there, nevertheless. You were surprised, though, when upon looking at him, you saw him shifting uncomfortably, looking everywhere but you and your family, picking at his cuticles. It was a bad habit you shared, but one that gave away nervousness, anxiety - guilt. What the hell did you do, Spider?

“How long have I been out?”

“About a day?”

You turned to Max and Norm, who were dutifully listening to everything, and you could tell how overwhelming it all was to them, how crazy and mind numbing and revolting. But it was life, your life. Your life.

“How is he?”

All of the attention shifted back onto Neteyam, who looked like he was resting. He looked… happy. Peaceful. You hoped whatever he was going through, it was better than this abusive reality, and you hope he could finally rest, until he was ready to come back to you.

“He’s in a coma, Ace.” You gasped a little, and another stabbing pain shot through you. “Look here.” He rose the portable EEG he had in his hands and scanned Neteyam’s brain from a distance.

Your breath stopped as you took in the information on the screen.

“He’s in a hypoxic-ischaemic coma.”

“W-what does that mean?”

You gulped loudly before you answered Jake.

“It means that his brain didn’t have enough oxygen after his heart stopped.” What you didn’t want to tell him is how few people actually come back from that, and come back the same way they left. You exchanged a look with Norm and saw the imperceptible head shake he gave in your direction, and once again, felt pain stabbing you everywhere in your body.

“B-but he’ll be alright, no? He’ll wake up and it’ll be alright?”

You lied to yourself as much as to them. “Yes. Yes, he’ll be alright.”

Neteyam woke up startled, deep nightmares still fresh in his mind, nightmares of a battle, of a ship, of blood dripping over him and on the floor, pain shooting through him ceaselessly. Images of his mother screaming that haunted him, images of your forlorn face as the last thing on his mind before it all ended. He breathed a sigh of relief as he took in the familiar beauty of your meadow and took in the two small bodies resting against his own, nuzzled in his chest. He was ok. Everything was ok. He was home, his kids were safe. The voice humming peacefully blessed his ears, and he knew then that you were also safe. It was just a nightmare.

He quietly untangled himself from his kids’ grasps, that ended up cuddling each other back to sleep, paying little mind to their dad. He took in the sight that swelled his heart so much he felt it was going to explode out of his chest. He has never been happier. He couldn’t imagine life getting any better.

“I didn’t know if you’d come back.” Your voice was soft and angelic, like it always was, but your words confused him.

“What do you mean? Where else would I go?”

You sighed, but patted the spot next to you so he could join you. You looked over at the two little beings sleeping peacefully a few feet from you.

“So these are our kids, huh?”

Further confusion enwrapped Neteyam like a quilt. He didn’t understand most words that were coming out of your mouth.

“So you want two kids? Not three? I always thought you wanted a whole football team.” You say almost to yourself, laughing a little with your hand brought to your mouth in amusement.

“Atan, what is going on? I don’t understand what you are saying. You’re acting like you don’t know our kids.”

You smiled a little in his direction, a sorrowful smile, but as you brought your hand up to his face and caressed his cheek in the way you always did, in the way that calmed his mind and set his skin ablaze, all the worry left him.

“They’re beautiful. So beautiful. Perfect mix of you and me. You know, I used to think about our kids, think about the impossible scenario that you and me could bring life into this crazy world, but they’re so much better than my imagination ever was. Pure and good, unlike the world they’ll never get to see.”

Neteyam didn’t have time to question you, not when the little bundles of joy in question rose sleepily and tackled you both, squeals and happy screams filling up the forest.

“Mummy! Daddy! You’re both here! We missed you, mum!”

“Did you, now?” Neteyam looked at you, and you looked like you were struggling to adjust to the new development, like you were trying to thread the ground and the situation carefully. You looked…uncomfortable. Why were you uncomfortable around your own children? Neteyam’s seen you with Tuk a million times, you were great with children. He couldn’t help the seed of doubt and fear that was growing in his belly, making him nervous. What was going on?

“Let’s swim, all of us! We haven’t swam together in a long time!” Tsyeym pushed to her feet and grabbed you both with all her might, trying to will you towards the river. He watched as you relented, and eventually got up, grabbing her on the way and bringing her up into your arms.

“Wait a second. Let me have a look at you.” You analysed the little girl, your little girl, every feature and freckle on her face. You poked her small nose with your index finger and traced it on her face, on her perfect pink plush lips and her yellow eyes, to her braided hair. You gently grabbed her queue and laughed a little as Tsyeym shrieked - it tickled her. “So you’re my little baby girl? You are the most beautiful thing in the world, aren’t you?” You turned to Neteyam, and he noticed you holding back tears. You looked happy. “She has my eyes. My mother’s eyes.”

Neteyam nodded, confusion still gnawing at him. “Of course she does. Your eyes are the most incredible things I have ever seen in my life. They are like treasures - my treasures.”

“Just like she is.” You held her against your chest and Neteyam watched as his daughter made a home out of it, so stuck to you he didn’t think he could ever separate you again.

“Tsyeym (treasure). That should be her name.”

“Atan… that is her name.”

“And what about this mighty warrior?” Kalin ran to his mother, grabbing onto your leg and holding on, attaching himself to you much like Tsyeym did. You kneeled, with Tsy still in your arms, and did a similar inspection of his son as you just did a few minutes ago. You took him by the hand and twirled him around, taking in every aspect of his being. “Look at this hair! My hair. Tsyeym has your hair, but he has mine. And look at those stripes, just like mummy and daddy, like a little tiger. Come here.” You kissed his entire face, starting with his nose and all around, ending with his human-coloured eyes and the top of his head.

“Why do you taste so sweet? You’re a sweetie pie, aren’t you? You’re mine, my sweet.”

You looked up at Neteyam, like you just had the most brilliant idea. “Kalin!! His name has to be Kalin (Sweet to the taste)!”

Why did you keep doing that? Those were their names, their names you gave them at birth. He was going to ask you what the hell was going on with you, when a loud sound boomed in the sky. It sounded like thunder, but not quite. It must have been thunder, what else could it be? The kids screaming got his undivided attention, and he rushed to their side to comfort them both, grabbing Kalin is his arms and holding him while he saw you doing the same with your baby girl.

“Shh, it’s alright. It’s alright, we’re alright.”

“What was that?”

“My love, you need to remember. Please. I’m here for you.”

“I know you are, Atan. I just don’t know what you want me to remember. Can you please tell me?”

“I can’t, Neteyam. You have to figure it out yourself. You have to try harder. We don't have a lot of time. Please. I am here for you.”

The river adventure removed the anxiety rising in Neteyam’s chest, and he concluded the boom he heard was just particularly nasty thunder. Thunderstorms were not uncommon in the forest, and the sooner his babies got used to them and realised they were nothing to be afraid of - the better. There was no reason to let it come between them and the perfect day they were having. After a couple hours, you were all soaked, so much laughter and joy Neteyam’s mouth hurt from how much it was stretching to accommodate the unwavering smile refusing to leave his face. Eventually, his family was all too tired to go on, and you all stretched on the grass, huddled together, arms and legs intertwined so thoroughly, it was impossible to tell who was who anymore.

“Mummy, can you sing for us? It’s nap time!”

“Is it nap time already? Sure, sweets. I can sing.”

In her waters, deep and true

Lie the answers and a path for you

Dive down deep into her sound

But not too far or you'll be drowned

“Neteyam…” you were hunched over your mate’s body, alone with just him, alone at last to pour your soul out and hope he would hear you, hope there was a chance. You had to try.

“Neteyam… please. I know you are in pain, and I know how much this life takes and takes from you. I know you’re probably at peace wherever you are, but you can’t leave me. I can’t do this without you. I know it’s selfish, so selfish, but I need you to please come back to me. I love you so much, and I’m trying so hard, but you have to come back. I can’t live knowing all I’ll ever get is scraps of you, scraps of us. Not after everything we’ve been through. Not after I’ve seen the future, so clear and bright in my head. Not after knowing everything I’ll lose if I lose you.”

You walked to the edge of the platform and sat down next to your favourite two scientists, that you were so happy to see, and so sad it was always under such undesirable circumstances.

“How is he?”

“Pretty much the same.” You dunked your feet in the water with a sigh, looking at the way the fish swam in between them, some of them tickling you as they went past.

“How are you? We didn’t even get to give you a check and make sure everything’s alright. You gave him a lot of blood.”

“I’m fine, don’t worry about me. I did what I had to do.”

“You saved his life, Ace. He was dead and you brought him back to life. You did it.”

“Maybe. Maybe I just revived his heart so he could be a vegetable for the rest of time. Maybe all I did is prolong the inevitable and give his family false hope.”

“Don’t say that. He’ll wake up.”

You rolled your eyes and huffed annoyed in Max’s direction.

“Come on, Max. We’re all scientists here. What are the chances someone comes back from hypoxic-ischaemic coma? Roughly 70% of people die. And of the 30% that make it, most of them have severe brain damage, that impacts most aspects of their lives.”

“That’s human statistics, Ace. Human statistics have no business here on Pandora. You know that. You of all people should know that. You died. You were without oxygen for 30 minutes, and you came back, after chatting to your mum in the afterlife and her telling you the cure for a deadly virus. You should have faith, Ace. Faith in yourself, in Neteyam…faith in Eywa.”

You couldn’t take another word on the subject, not when you were so close to fully breaking down in front of them, so you chose another - easier to digest, if not as hard to talk about.

“Did Jake and Neytiri go get my dad?”

“Yes. They all went. They should be back soon.”

“Lo’ak said you… went to save him. What happened?”

“He… he’s not who I thought he was. Not who I spent my whole life hating. I was wrong about him. I was so wrong.”

You told them everything that happened after he left you the message, and they listened attentively and gasped softly at every turn of events.

“I… I couldn’t save him. He bled out in front of me. I will never get a chance to make it right. He’ll never get a chance to make it right. I wanted him to stay. I thought we could finally be a family. I thought I could allow him to finally have a daughter, a daughter that stays, a daughter that he got to watch live. I wanted him to be a grandpa. I imagined him teaching my kids about Earth, babysitting when Neteyam and I wanted time for ourselves. I don’t know why, but I feel like he would have been the best grandpa. He saved us, he saved me. He was redeeming himself, he could have been one of the people. We were supposed to be a family. I was supposed to have a family.”

You didn’t even realise you were crying until Norm reached over and wiped the tears off your face with his thumb. They didn’t have anything to say. There was nothing, no comforting words, no words of encouragement that would ever mend this, that would ever make this less painful than it was.

Your attention shifted onto the Tsurak that flew above water, a burst of orange in a sea of blue. Behind it were a couple of ilu and in the air, Neytiri’s ikran was flying majestically.

Jake reached your marui first, followed closely by the rest of the Sullys. You got up to help him unload your dad’s body, wrapped beautifully in mangrove leaves and colourful shroud and placed on a stretcher made out of woven tree branches.

He was hidden from you, but it didn’t matter - your imagination was more than enough to paint him right in front of your mind’s eye, bloated and bloodied, wet and dirty from having been left on a rock for 2 days. You just left him there. By himself. You passed out and left your own dad to rot, the same way he did the first time - alone. Your mind was torturing you, the way it always loved to, and you knew this image would be tattooed in your brain, alongside that of Neteyam’s eyes going vacant as you watched, for as long as you lived. No matter how much you healed, no matter how much old nightmares faded, there were always new ones to take their place, new nightmares to show you you will never outrun your trauma. Not now, not soon, not for the rest of your life.

“We talked to Tonowari and Ronal, baby girl. We explained, we told them what Lo’ak and Spider told us, about how your dad fought alongside us, how he saved your lives, and he will be allowed a Metkayina funeral. This way he will be with Eywa.”

Your tears that never ceased multiplied, and you couldn’t help the sob that escaped your lips.

“Thank you.” You ran into Jake’s arms and he hugged you tightly, stroking your hair gently in a comforting gesture. “Thank you so much. Thank you.”

“Of course, kid. Your dad was a good man, and he deserves to be with your mother again.”

You brought him to the Tsahik’s tent, and watched as they undid all the wrappings, until he was in view, and although not as bad as you imagined, he didn’t look good. You knew decomposition worked faster in water than on land, but you never thought you’d have to witness it first hand, and definitely not with your dad.

“Go, kid. We can clean him up.”

You shook your head, not removing your eyes from his body. You left him there, you had to do this.

You knelt on the ground next to him, and Ronal guided you through the required steps and rituals, until he was ready, a few hours later. He looked a lot better when you were done, and you smiled softly, allowing the salty tears to stain your mouth. He looked peaceful. You didn’t think he felt peace in his whole life, so you were at least grateful he could experience it now.

“We will do the funeral ceremony tonight. We will take him to the Cove of the Ancestors after Eclipse.”

Another stabbing pain shot through you, and you wondered how much longer your body would keep going under this amount of strenuous stress. How long until all this heartbreak broke your body down beyond repair?

You returned to your tent, getting ready for the ceremony, allowing your family to paint you in funeral markings, allowing them to dress you in ceremonial garbs, an ornate shawl covering your shoulders - all while you were holding Tuk in your lap. You were cold, you noted absentmindedly. You couldn’t remember the last time you felt cold, but there is was - shivers, like ice water in your veins, running down your spine, extending to each extremity, making a home in your bones.

You needed Neteyam. You needed him to be here, you needed him to be your light, to guide you through this time, to hold you and keep you warm as you had to give your dad to the sea, and say goodbye - forever. But he didn’t budge from his spot on the mat, breathing in and out deeply and regularly. He’s just sleeping. Just sleeping.

Neteyam was cold as he woke up from another horrible dream, a similar dream, a deathly dream he couldn’t shake from his mind no matter how much he tried. He kept being pulled in and out of consciousness, it seemed, and he wondered meekly if anything was wrong. Some things felt wrong. Just a little wrong. He took a look at you, buried in his arms, sleeping peacefully next to him, and gasped as your face brought back another dream, so vivid and lucid, it was like it wasn’t a dream at all, like it was a… a memory.

As much as he missed home, Neteyam had to admit little managed to beat waking up in this marui, where the sun was shining through the intricate web of fabrics, creating colourful moving patterns and where the salty air cleared his nose immediately and woke him up with newfound enthusiasm for a new day of discovering all the new ways this place differed from his own. His entire family was fast asleep, and he sighed contently when he felt your breath tickling his neck and your arms and legs draped loosely across his body. He couldn’t help the excited movement of his tail taking you in, knowing he got to wake up next to you every day, that he’d never have to live without this feeling ever again, that he got to call you his mate, his light… his. For life. He kissed the top of you head and watched as you stirred, waking up from your slumber with a haphazard stretch of all your limbs. When your amber eyes met his and your tired smile made its way to your lips, his heart stopped. You were so beautiful.

“Good morning, my love. Did anyone ever tell you it’s ok to not wake up at the crack ass of dawn?”

He smiled, trying to keep quiet so as to not disturb the rest of his family.

“I’m too excited to see you to sleep, Atan.”

You rolled your eyes at him, letting out an amused scoff. He rolled on top of you, pinning you down with his body. You gasped at the feeling of his hard-on rubbing against your core and he smiled at the way your pupils immediately dilated and your breath shallowed, rolling your hips to meet his.

“Atan, it’s the crack ass of dawn, what are you doing?”

“You started it.”

“You’re insatiable, you know that?”

“Hey, I have had to live for years wanting you and not being able to have you. You have a lot to make up for.”

He laughed again and laughed some more when you pressed your hand tightly against his mouth as his mother turned slightly in her sleep.

“How about we go for a swim, just you and me? Then I’ll make it up to you for as long as you like.”

You raised your head slightly to close the gap in between you and the kiss brought life into him, brought light into every corner of his being until there was nothing left of him but this feeling, the feeling of you overtaking his every sense.

He was panting as the dream faded, panic overtaking him. What was that? It felt so real. So raw. Not a dream. A memory. Your amber eyes, your blue striped skin. He looked at the version of you sleeping in his arms, human, the same human he’s known all his life, the human he fell in love with. The skin he traced with his eyes, the freckles adorning it that Neteyam knew by heart, your hair that flowed softly down your back and tickled his arm where it touched it. Your eyes that were your mother’s, the thing you loved most about yourself - that he loved most about you. The body you left behind when you did your consciousness transfer.

How were you here? In his arms? How was it possible?

“My love, you need to remember. Please. I’m here for you.”

Remember what? What couldn’t he remember? Why couldn’t he remember?

“Ace, come here. Look at this.” You were about to leave for your dad’s funeral when Norm pulled you aside, showing you the EEG scanning Neteyam’s brain waves. “Look at it.”

You did and your eyes widened as your brain processed what it was seeing. “He’s… seizing?”

“Those are ictal epileptiform discharges. He’s definitely seizing.”

“But his body is still.”

“Not all seizures manifest the same way. There are non-motor seizures, as well. But the waves don’t lie, Ace. He’s seizing. And we can’t know for sure, because we didn’t see Kiri’s brain when she seized, but I think it’s the same kind of seizures. She had interictal activity in her prefrontal when we got to her.”

Your brain felt like it was short-circuiting taking in all of the information and trying to process it, at the same time as dealing with the horrible pain shooting through you and the heartbreak of having to bury your dad without your mate by your side. The world was fading around you, but you knew you had to push through, at least until the end of the ceremony.

If Neteyam’s seizures were the same as Kiri’s, maybe the coma was a lot more than what they thought, than what you thought. Maybe it has something to do with Eywa. Could it be? That he was trapped, just like your mum had been? Could it be that you could find him? Finally see him again? That you could get him back?

Your body quickly caught up to you as the pain became unbearable, and you screamed loudly without meaning to as you felt cramping in your abdomen, like life was being torn away from you with every second passing. The marui and everyone around it quickly disappeared from view, and you felt yourself collapse to the ground and into deep slumber. Maybe you could finally rest.

You woke up confused and numb. The world slowly came back into focus, as did your family members going in between you and Neteyam, unable to figure out who they should worry for at any current moment. You glanced at your arm and then above you, and said a silent prayer of gratitude for Norm and Max, who decided to give you some morphine for the pain. As Lo’ak took note of your cognisance, he let out a scream that came out more like a pained yelp.

“She’s awake. She’s awake.”

Jake rushed to your side and took your face in both his hands, alarmingly checking on you, eyes darting over every piece of you they could cover. Then a look of deep sorrow replaced his previous one, and you felt the panic rise in you once more, not enough morphine in the world to keep the ugly feeling at bay.

“What happened?” Was Neteyam ok? Was everyone ok? What else could possibly be wrong? It didn’t feel like there was anything in this world that could make this whole ordeal somehow worse.

“You… You passed out, kid.”

Norm’s body was trailing all around you, checking on your vitals and on the other IV you know realised were flowing into your body from various sites.

“Just please tell me. You’re looking at me like you have something to tell me, and I just need to know. Please. I just need to know.”

“I’m so sorry, baby girl. I’m so, so sorry.”

Your entire family encircled you, holding onto you, your arms, your hands, your legs. Looking at you sorrowfully, mournfully, and you felt like you were one sentence away from passing out again.

Max spoke. “The stress… everything you went through the past couple of days, it put a lot of strain on your body. A lot more than it could take.”

“Honey… you had a miscarriage.”

You were wrong, you thought as you felt the consciousness slip away from your grasp once more. There was one thing in this world that could make this whole ordeal somehow worse.

Taglist (thank you ily x) @changing7 @erenjaegerwifee @im-in-a-pansexual-panik @winchestertitties @puffb4ll @rebeccao03 @ultimatebluff @cottoncandy23 @zaddyneteyamlovergirl @n3t3y4msm4t3 @loquatious-josephi-krakousky @eternallyvenus @fresh-new-yoik-watah @lu-the-ghost-reader @@miawastakens @mm0thie @fanboyluvr @amortencjja @lovekeeho @trixscarlett

*poem by Nikki Ursula - Seventy Years of Sleep #4

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