#anyways. the meds aren't working i think

[min3nc]

woke up from the weirdest dream relating to the weirdest team (bolas) where, in the context of it all being very wrong and weird and not the way it's supposed to be and everyone is losing their shit they are all like just sitting around a campfire with philza and like cellbit for some reason goes to kiss baghera (i think they were joking around) and philza in a very stern dad tone goes "cellbit you're GAY and MARRIED" and then he turns around and to jaiden (i remember very clearly the reasoning being q!jaiden is just a silly little guy = not a woman in his mind? like, she's very gender. anyways) and she like plucks her lips out towards cellbit, and philza, EXHAUSTED goes "jaiden you're ARO." and she's just like. "but it would be funny dude" then she faceplants and kisses the mud.

this is all said in the same tone of that one vine? tiktok? that's of this dude who's drunk as shit kssing a girl and eating meat and there's this other dude going "NOOOO YOU'RE GAY.... YOU'RE VEGAN!!!!!"

oh and charlie was naked and covered in dirt and mud by foolish, like when you bury someone on the sand while at the beach.

[indigodawns]

.

[look-at-the-stars-tonight]

sorry for diary posting so much on main but this is the last one today prommy

[russellsppttemplates]

We're a couple of idiots, aren't we? (Charles Leclerc)

You had always been there to see Charles race and you wouldn't let your fight interfere with that

Note: english is not my first language. I'm not the best at writing angst pieces, but I hope this one is decent enough!

Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!

my masterlist

Tw: family issues (alludes to the caregiver necessities), couple fight

Tag list: @myloverjk-blog

It all began when you came home later than expected, the tiredness evident in your eyes as you paced your bag down on the sofa and allowed yourself to rest for a little, "Hey, amour", Charles whispered, testing to see if you were awake as he walked inside the living room, "hey", you said, patting the seat next to you.

Kissing your forehead, Charles sat next to you, "how was your day?", he asked, rubbing your thigh, "exhausting", you sighed, "and the next few are going to be even worse. I probably won't be home for dinner tomorrow anyway".

Charles felt uneasy, squirming around in his seat. You had been working a lot, your family also needed you on their side since your grandparents needed more assistance these days, so you and Charles haven't been able to spend that much time together. And wether it was the fact that you're used to being around eachother or the fact that the season was not going as expected, Charles felt like he hadn't spent enough time with the person he considered his safe and happy place.

"You have been very busy, I feel like I've hardly spent time with you", Charles noted, and maybe it was a seemingly honest comment that wasn't intended to be taken as harmful as you did.

"I know I've not been home, Charles, you think I don't feel that too? I know we haven't spent much time together just the two of us, but it's not been easy! Everyone needs me here, there and everywhere at the same time, and I also need time for me!", you let out.

Unexpectedly, your words also impacted Charles in a way you didn't think they would, "I know you've been busy, but we also need to spend time together, no? Or is our relationship not something we should invest time on? In a relationship, we both need eachother", he gulped. A weird and new feeling sat in his chest, like he was pressuring you and that he was burdening you.

"We do, but we also need to let eachother have some time, too!", you said, feeling anger, sadness, and overall tiredness from your recent days, "I'm going to bed", you mumbled, getting up and heading for your shared bedroom.

The energy you had left in your body was only enough to allow you to wash your face, noticing the dull and dark tone as you quickly rubbed some moisturiser on, grabbing your pyjamas to out them on and lay in bed, taking a painkiller for the growing headache.

When Charles finally go to the bedroom, he noticed you were already asleep on your side of the bed, carefully walking along the side so he could kiss your forehead before he too got ready for bed.

.

By the time the next morning arrived, Charles had ready left, and when you grabbed your phone, notifications from various WhatsApp groups popped up.

Mum + Dad

Can you go by grandma's house today? She was complaining of some pain and we can't remember if her meds box is sorted out or not.

Ferrari GP Weekend

Okay, just to make sure I'm not leaving anyone out: Y/N, you're not coming this weekend, right?

Since your family had been needing you to spend more time with them and at home, you had already said that you weren't sure you'd be joining them for that Grand Prix, and last night's fight settled the subject.

Texting both of the groups, you got up and got ready for the day, already knowing it was going to be a tough one.

You and Charles didn't fight a lot, at least not like this. Usually, you always found a way to talk about things and sort them out. So even this was new territory, not having talked about the subject and finding a common ground, because the situation you both left it at the night before was not the one to have.

Throughout the day, you hopefully texted Charles saying that you'd try to be home so you could talk to eachother before he left later on the evening, and while you intended to keep it, you had to text him again

To Charles

I'm sorry, but I don't think I'll be home until nighttime. My grandma needs me and it's going to take a while.

Have a safe flight. Can you text me when you land, please? Love you ✨️

True to your word, you sat in your bedroom with the moon already shinning through the windows and showcasing perfectly Charles' bedside table with none of his rings, watch and bracelets where he usually put them when he was at the house.

.

"Why did I arrive to the paddock today only to find out that you are not joining me this weekend?", Francisca said over the phone, apparently not even bothering to wish you a good morning, even though it clearly wasn't one.

"Because I've been the busiest bee ever under the sun, and I also had a fight with Charles, and I need to sleep for three days straight to recover", you replied back, noticing the change in Pierre's girlfriend's tone.

"Oh", she added, "I'm sorry, it's just that you're always here and I haven't been able to talk to him properly yet, maybe it's a good thing I haven't yet", she admitted.

One thing you liked about her, was how honest she was with you, and you needed it right now, "do you think I should go? We left the subject hanging and it's not something light we can just solve over the phone. And besides, I've always been there for these races, and he deserves as much support as he can get", you asked, chewing on your bottom lip as you waited for her answer.

"I have no idea why you fought, nor do I want to know unless you feel comfortable in telling me, but I do know that you're made for eachother, so if your heart tells you to come to the race, you should", she advised and you could hear the smile on her voice, "besides, I love your company, so it's a win win".

.

From all the times you had previously travelled with Charles, you had become acquainted and a pro a listing what you needed for the race weekends, so packing was easy and quick: two changes of clothes for both colder and warmer weather, basic toiletries bag in a backpack with entertainment and snacks for the flight.

The early hours allowed you to get to the airport without any traffic and make it to the gate with enough time to spare so you could grab a coffee to go.

Francisca knew you were coming, and after having a conversation with your family, you explained to them how the whole situation was putting pressure not only on you but also on your relationship with Charles. As you expected, they were not aware of how the situation was on your side and sat down with you so you could find a better arrangement.

Arriving at the airport of destination, you quickly found the transport line that would be taking you to the closest stop near the paddock, gradually seeing fans get inside as the stops approached the track site.

You followed them in, wanting to go as unnoticed as possible as you walked along them.

"I just saw on Instagram that Charles had left his hotel a while ago, so he should be here any minute now", a young woman around your age commented with her friends, stopping by the benches you were sitting in. Turns out you were waiting for the same person after all.

"Is it okay if we sit here?", one of them asked kindly, "Oh, you're Y/N", one of the girls said.

Nodding, you pushed your backpack to rest near your legs, "of course you can sit", you smiled, still not used to the fact that fans often recognised your face.

"Thanks!", she scurried nervously, urging her friends to sit, seeing their surprised faces as they looked at you, "Also, I'm sorry, I'm sure this is weird for you, that I know your name and you don't know mine, I- we didn't expect to find you here", she apoligised, finally sitting down.

"It's okay, unless you're going to turn out to be come crazy stalker fan, I think we will be fine", you smiled, hoping they would catch the joke and relax a little.

"No no no!", they all said, smiling when you smiled back, "but, may I ask what you're doing here? I mean, don't you have an all access pass?", one of them wondered as she sat next to you.

"I'm surprising Charles, actually", you added, feeling like saying anything else would not only be violating yours and Charles' privacy, but also allowing the creation of rumours you wouldn't want, "I wasn't originally coming to see him race, but some things cleared up on my calendar so I thought I'd surprise him", you finished, seeing them smile, "do you come to watch races regularly?", you asked, changing the subject hopefully subtly enough that they wouldn't notice too much.

Conversation was flowing easily, really, they seemed like really nice girls and it never felt invasive, so the time you had to wait went by quickly, hearing people call your boyfriend's name.

You could notice his presence anywhere, that was a given. Wether it was his well trained torso that made spotting him even from his back, or his handsome face, it wasn't hard yo miss him even surrounded by fans who were wearing the same t-shirt as him.

"Let me stand around you so he won't notice me", you said, "with how enamoured he is of you, I'm sure it won't be long", one of the girls, named Lyla, you learned, spoke, wanting to see the scene unfold as he approached you.

"Hi!", Charles greeted, posing for the pictures while he signed the caps they had, not noticing your hand holding one of his own caps was in the mix.

"Charles! Can you sign this, please?", you asked, hoping you were loud enough, "I was not coming to see you race today, but I'm very happy I did", you almost yelled, thanking the fact that the other girls had helped you by keeping quiet until he realised you were there.

It was enough for Charles to recognise the voice. After all, he had been longing to hear it for the past couple of days.

"Y/N, you're here!", he called, handing Lyla the permanent marker before he hugged you, "I missed you so much, I'm sorry", he whispered on your ear before pulling back a little so he could look you in the eye, "you don't have a pass, do you?", he wondered, seeing you shake your head, "I'll see what I can do, but you're coming with me", he smiled, holding your hand in his and bidding goodbye to the group of girls after you all took a group picture.

The rush until you arrived in his driver's room didn't allow you to talk until you sat on the sofa after greeting everyone and thanking one of the team members for getting you a pass on such short notice.

"Do you think we can talk about it? I don't want to ruin the race by distracting you from it, but I don't think we should be here and not discuss it either", you brought the subject, looking up to see Charles push a chair and sit in front of you, "I want to apologise first", you said, "I never should have said what I said, especially the way I said it, I'm sorry", you apologised, "I never intended it in a way that would hurt you".

Charles grabbed your hands, lacing them in his and looking into your eyes, "I'm sorry, too. I think we should talk about it, too. I want this to be solved, I want us to be well", he admitted.

"My grandparents have been needing a bit more help, and my parents counted on me for it. And I feel like I haven't spent that much time with you, and I'm so sorry for it, but sometimes it just got too much. And I didn't want to burden you, you have your own things to worry about and this would be another thing. They're better now and this was probably a bad phase, but still", you explained.

Charles chuckled before he saw the confusion on your face, "no, I'm joking about this, amour. I'm glad they're better", he reasoned, "but I thought I was being a burden because I felt like I was clingy, like I needed you more than usual and that you had had enough. I didn't want to put more on your plate", he sighed.

Smiling at him, you moved your hand to caress his cheek, "you could never be too much, Charles. Sometimes I just need to deal with things on my own for a bit, even if there is help from someone else", you blushed.

"I know you need me to give you the space you need, that's why I didn't want to push you to talk about things, because as much as I want to craddle you in my arms forever and shield you away from the world's evil, I know you like to do things on your own, at least at first", he noted, earning your silent agreement, "but I'm here for you, always. I'm glad we worked that out", he smiled, pulling your face to his and kissing you deeply, only stopping when someone knocked on the door.

"I heard my favourite girl is back in the paddock, so I suggest you come out because I'm not feeling like I want to see whatever is going on there", your recognised Francisca's voice, getting up and opening the door to see Pierre by her side, "I told her she shouldn't interrupt you two, but she was very excited to know how the surprise went", he smiled.

"A very good surprise indeed, the best one ever", Charles said, pulling you in for one last kiss before he ventured out to the garage, a new feeling of confidence knowing you were there to watch him race.

[thevoidstaredback]

The tale tell signs of the Batmobile pulling into the Cave reverberated for nearl a minute before it even pulled into the garage. Once parked, the driver side door opened and NightBat (Nightwing as Batman) got out before closing the door.

"B!" Red Robin waved, "Welcome back! How'd it go?"

Not even surprised that Robin had gotten tired of babysitting the Leaguers, NightBat walked to join the group. "As usual. Batwoman could've handled herself."

Everyone on comms ignored the woman's indignant call from where she and Selina had joined Barbra and Jason in the Clocktower.

"Bats!" Green Lantern called, "You left us with Robin, right?"

"Mhmm."

"This isn't Robin! He says he's been here the whole time, but he hasn't because he's not Robin!"

NightBat was trying very hard to keep his amusement to himself. It didn't help that he had people laughing in his ear. He could tell RR and Spoiler were having the same issue. "Red Robin."

Green Lantern threw his hands in the air. "I give up!"

"Seriously, man," Spoiler said, concern lacing her tone, "If you're too paranoid or you aren't feeling too well, we can cut this short."

Wonder Woman glared at the man. "No, thank you, we are fine. You were showing us the med bay?"

"Right this way!" Red Robin guided them to the large room that wouldn't look out of place in a hospital. It was closer to looking like a mix between an ER, a Post OP, a Pre OP, and a waiting room. Somehow, it worked. Somehow, it was better than the one on the Watchtower.

Martian Manhunter took the lead in this room. "This is better equipped than the Watchtower's own medbay," he turned to NightBat, "Why is that?"

"Oh, oh!" Spoiler jumped in place, "I can answer that!" When everyone's attention was on her, she said, "It's because we're all human."

"Excuse me?" Superman quirked an eyebrow.

"Eloquently put, Spoiler," Robin smacked her arm, "Show a bit of decorum, will you? Honestly."

"Again?!" Green Lantern shreaked. He was ignored.

"It's true," she shrugged, "Anyway, I gotta bounce." She turned to jog out of the room, "It was nice meeting you all!" she shouted just as the door closed behind her. After a minute, the sound of her bike revving and fading told them all she had left.

The tour of the large med bay soon ended and Robin led the group back up to the smaller med bay. It was outfitted as a small clinic and not an ER, a few chairs being the only hint at a seating area. It was, like the larger one, also completely enclosed in bullet resistant glass.

Taking seats at the meeting table, none of the visiting Justice Leaguers noticed Signal taking his suit and leaving to finish Batwoman's and Catwoman's patrol, nor did they notice Cass sneaking Spoiler's suit back into its case before she took the stairs up to the Manor. Tim had also managed to put his suit back where it belonged before going back to the Manor with Cass.

Flash was the only one not sitting, having too much anxious energy to be able to sit still. So, he wandered around the upper area, careful not to touch anything. He was, however, looking very closely at everything. Something just felt...off. "Wait a minute," he stopped the small talk at the table, "Where did those books come from?"

"What are you talking about?" Green Arrow asked.

"The books, on the table! They weren't there when we got here!"

Robin made his judgement known from behind his mask. "There have always been books on this table, Flash."

"No, there haven't!"

"I think you should sit down," Superman stood to usher his fellow hero over to the chairs, "You're obviously anxious about something-"

Flash didn't let himself be touched, focusing on every little detail now. "And, the suits!" he ran down to the displays, "Two of the suits that were missing earlier are here now! And a different one is missing!"

Green Lantern and Aquaman jumped over the railing to join the Flash. "He's right," the Atlantian announced.

"What's going on here, Bats?" Green Arrow asked as he, too, jumped the railing.

Robin muttered, "We have stairs," under his breath as he followed the adults in jumping over the railing to the lower level.

"I have so many questions." Green Lantern added on.

Wonder Woman stood at the front of the group, "Why did you change your mind to invite us here?"

NightBat raised an eyebrow under the cowl. "I didn't. The others who operate in Gotham did. I just happen to be in charge."

"And how many people, exactly, operate in Gotham?" Superman asked.

Robin was the one to give a non-answer. "How many do you think?"

"This isn't funny, Bats," Cyborg glared. "What's going on."

NightBat said nothing. Instead, he turn away from the group with a swish of his cape and headed to the locker rooms next to the training area.

Now the only Gotham vigilante there, Robin was the focus of the JL's attention. Wonder Woman knelt in front of him to talk. "Will you tell us what's going on?"

Robin scoffed, crossed his arms, and tilted his head up to look down his nose at her. "Do not be so patronising. We invited you here to prove that we do, in fact, trust you all, and you have accused us of trying to trick you?" He expertly hid his satisfaction at the guilt that took over the adults' faces. "Perhaps we should not have let you come here." He turn with just as much dramatics as both Batman and Nightwing. "Come, I'll-"

"What're you all still doing here?" Batman glared as he came out from the locker rooms, several things in hand.

"I was just showing them to the Zeta Tubes." Robin answered.

"Hn." Batman grunted, walking back to the upper level first. The visiting heroes followed him sullenly. Robin took up the rear. Nightwing chose that moment to ride back into the Cave.

"Where you all going?" He called from the garage as he parked his bike.

"Robin was just showing them out," Batman didn't raise his voice above what it normally was, even as he walked away from everyone and into the less echo-y chamber of the lab.

Nightwing pouted. "Boo," He was quick to join them on the upper level. "Why don't you pack it in for the night, Baby Bat? I'll take these guys home." His wink to the adultier adults was not hidden by his mask. How does he do that?

Robin nodded. "Very well." He promptly turned and left for the locker rooms.

"C'mon," Nightwing ushered, "B's run outta patience. I'm glad he lasted this long, though! It took forever to get him to let me and Robin show you around! And, when Spoiler heard we had company, she just had to come say 'hi'. Though, I'm sad you couldn't meet Agent A or O or Signal."

"Who?" Superman asked.

Nightwing laughed, the sound echoing in the Zeta Room. "Agent A's the one who makes sure we're all still alive at the end of the day. O is our eye in the sky, our ear to the ground, our guy in the chair. She knows everything. Nothing happens in Gotham without her knowing. And Signal is our newest addition. He's the only meta allowed to operate in the city, proven by the bat on his costume. He's our daytime hero, though, so he's out on patrol right now. A shame you couldn't meet him."

"And Batwoman?" Wonder Woman mentioned as she stepped up to the Zeta Tubes.

"Who?" Nightwing joked. The others didn't find it amusing. "Tough crowd," he mumbled. "Batwoman doesn't normally work with us. She's B's cousin. She's usually with the Birds of Prey, but she decided to come help us out for a bit."

"Birds of Prey?" Flash wondered.

"A story for another time, I'm afraid," Nightwing sighed, "The Zeta's are all set for the Watchtower. It was nice having you guys here, even though I had to leave so soon after you get here."

Cyborg patted his shoulder. "It's alright, shit happens. Is everyone at the bank alright?"

Nightwing nodded, "Yeah, no one got hurt."

"That's good."

With the final word said, the eight visiting heroes left Gotham. Nightwing was careful as he left, resetting the traps and security measures.

"And that's a wrap!" Jason called over comms.

Barbra took over just long enough to say, "Movie night at Wayne Manor!" before Selina cut everyone's comms.

Part 6 Part 8

[strwberri-milk]

Heyyy💟

Since your ask is open I was wondering if you can write a fic with the same concept as your "Finding Mc and leaving you" but for Zayne or Xavier? I'm a sucker for angst 😭

unfortunately xavier like. of the three i see him just not being able to date ANYBODY else but mc. tbvh i dont see ANY of them getting into realtionships but rafayel i think of it as like. release for him and just stright copium while dating someone and using them as a substitution for mc, zayne dates someone bc he thinks its 1) what hes supposed to do and 2) hes too dangerous to be around you and 3) doesnt think you return his feelings anyway whereas xavier is just a cryptid and idt you can make slenderman date anybody if he didnt want to so his is. a little diff than the other two

You met Zayne during med school. He was so singularly focused on his career that you don't even know how everything happened. You were somehow lucky enough to find him when he was free, confessing that somehow, over the sessions he was tutoring you for as review for his own lessons, you fell in love with him. You had a good feeling that he wouldn't reciprocate your feelings but you just wanted to confess to him to say you did your best.

Surprisingly, he accepts and manages to carve out some time for you to go on a date. The entire ordeal almost seems transactional at first and you're worried he said yes only to let you down easily during the date. Somehow, one date turns to another date, then a third, then suddenly you find yourself in a committed relationship with Dr. Zayne, the youngest Cardiac Surgeon in Linkon City.

He chose not to speak too often about his childhood, telling you that he grew up in the same way everyone did. Sometimes, he'd mention a childhood friend that he had and that she often came to visit him as he was her primary physician for her heart condition. You never worried about her and had often run into her while meeting up with him after work. She had always been nothing but kind to you so you never would suspect anything.

Zayne was always kind of reserved around you but you never had to doubt that he cared for you. It's not until you're talking to your friends who are starting to get married or discussing their own relationships that somehow, the two of you just fell into a routine. Zayne was never affectionate with you but he always returned your affection. He remembers your birthday and anniversaries and always gets you the sweetest gifts. You know he's looking out for you but you get the sense that things aren't...this isn't what you want in a romantic relationship.

You ask him if he sees the relationship going anywhere, if there's any shared goals that the two of you want to work towards together or if you even make him happy. He's glad you're being honest with him but he asks you what brought it about and you have to confess that your friends seemed so much happier in their relationships whereas it felt like the two of you had grown stagnant. Hell the two of you don't even live together, moving in being something you had waited to bring up to him.

After a lengthy discussion and few days for the two of you to sit with the decision you end up having to break up. You aren't getting what you want out of a relationship with him and somehow, you know that you aren't making him as happy as he deserves.

You're glad you don't work at the same hospital at him but a year later you're invited to an event at his hospital. You're over him, for the most part, at this point but your heart still aches a little at the sight of him. On his arm is that friend of his, holding him tightly as she kisses his cheek in congratulations of whatever it was you were invited for. You know now as you watch them he never loved you as much as he loved her and for your peace of mind you decide to leave it at at that.

Xavier was an enigma. The two of you had been dating just a few months when suddenly everything changed. You were planning a date with him when he apologised for cancelling, saying that a new hunter at work needed his help and he was going to stay late to help her out.

You couldn't do anything really except realise that Xavier was cancelling more and more on you. You knew he felt bad because he'd call you or text you an apology but it seemed more like he was doing it out of obligation. You don't think he's cheating on you with her because even if you randomly called or texted him he'd always pick up and was open about where he was - he just wasn't there, with you like you wanted him to be.

He breaks up with you fairly quickly after that and it doesn't take you long to put two and two together. You followed some of his colleagues on social media and out of desperation starting stalking all of them to see if he was cheating on you. Once you found that the page of that new hunter he was working with you thought you'd find your smoking gun, only to be sorely disappointed.

She posted about him occasionally but everything was purely platonic. She never commented on anything he posted romantically and he didn't for her. It's not until months later that you see her post something about a first date with him, forced to come to terms that he didn't technically cheat on you but clearly he fell in love with her far sooner than he fell into like with you.

[skamenglishsubs]

Young Royals terms explained

One thing I noticed across all seasons, and in the official subtitles, and among fan discussions, is that everyone is throwing around the specific terms used to describe the workings of a monarchy a bit willy-nilly. The subtitles aren't always consistent in how they translate the Swedish terms, and the show never explains what the different ones mean.

In real life, we also use the terms a bit sloppy because it really doesn't matter that much, but I thought I'd take a stab at listing the terms, their best English translation, and what each term means to me.

Monarkin - The Monarchy

This is the political system, the form of government that Sweden, and a bunch of other countries around the world is using. It means that the office of Head of State is held by the head of a family, and is inherited according to whatever inheritance rules apply. The system also implies that you have an explicit class system, an upper class, and that your royals are the pinnacle of this class.

If you're a big fan of the system you're a royalist, and if you're a big fan of the opposite, a republic, you're a republican. Most people typically don't give a shit, though.

Kungahuset - ?

This is a term that the subtitles struggle a bit with, because there's no good English equivalent. It's sometimes translated as the monarchy, sometimes as the royal family, and sometimes as the royal court depending on context. In Swedish, it means the system and the people that inhabit the system. The official homepage of the Swedish royal family is https://www.kungahuset.se/

Kungafamiljen - The Royal Family

This term is used when talking about the royals as a family, it's about them as individuals, as people. In season 2 they mention the tv show "Året med kungafamiljen", which is a real show, and it has that name because it emphasises them as people. The purpose of the show is to make them relatable and human for PR reasons, to show off their quirky character or something.

Det Kungliga Huset - The Royal House

Never used in the show, but I thought I'd mention it anyway because you might be tempted to translate kungahuset like this, but that's a bit off. This term specifically means the monarch and the closest family members that are in the line of succession; it's everyone who is styled as a Royal Highness.

It can also mean the dynasty, the noble house that currently holds the title of king of Sweden. In the real world it's House Bernadotte, but in the show we never got to know the family name.

Slottet - The Royal Palace

The Royal Palace is the office of the monarch, the place where the work is done, it's where you would meet the royals for meetings, it's just like how a regular office is used for a regular business, it's their "HQ". The term is used pretty much how you would use "The White House" as both the building itself and the office of the president of the United States.

In the show, there's only one royal palace which serves as both residence and office. However, in the real Sweden, the royal family has two big palaces, the main one in the middle of Stockholm, and Drottningholm just outside. The main one is the office, where they work, and Drottningholm is their private residence, where they live most of the time.

Hovet - The Royal Court

In ye olden days, the court consisted of the king, his family, his servants, and the foremost nobles, advisors, and officials who hung around and essentially made up the executive branch of government. These days the court simply means the organisation that supports the royals in their official duties, it's all of their employees, and in the real Sweden the court has about 300 of them. Some of them still have funny titles like the Marshal of the Realm or Governor of the Royal Palaces, but think of those guys as the the vice presidents or directors or chiefs of staff of a normal company.

If you ever see something like "the court says", it means that the people working in the office of the monarch had a meeting and made a press release about something.

In the show there's a few named members of the court; Minou and Farima both appear to work for the PR department, while Jan-Olof is probably Marshal of the Court or something.

Kronan - The Crown

Just like in English, this term can mean the physical crown, the little golden hat with gems and stuff that is the symbol of the monarchy, but most often it means any legal entity that is the country itself, if that makes sense. For example, in Sweden, we think of the military, and all military equipment as "kronans egendom" - "property of the crown", and the single largest landowner in Sweden is technically a government-owned forestry company, but we think of their land as "kronans mark" - "crownlands".

The reason for this usage is that once upon a time all of these things were actually the personal property of the king, and inherited along with the office, but they've had to give it all up through consecutive political reforms. So, paradoxically, everything that is the property of the crown is actually owned by the people of Sweden through the government, while any personal belongings of the royal family isn't property of the crown.

[softxsuki]

Hallo~ I’m not sure if urgent requests are even open~

But, uhm. Could you please write Kyojuro fluff and comfort abt gro*ming? It’s been something I’ve struggled with for a few years by now. While it wasn’t anything too bad, it was still traumatizing. I was often talked about inappropriate subjects online and was vented to by the person. I feel kinda dirty and shit.

anyways, uhm. If you’re not open for urgent requests, then take your time :). Thank you so much!! Love your works <33

Rengoku Comforts Reader Who Has Been Gr**med

Please don't read if mentions of gr**ming is more triggering for you than comforting please! I don't go into detail with it, but please proceed with caution!

| Pairing: Rengoku x Gn!Reader (PLATONIC) | Genre: Comfort | Post-Type: Headcanon | Word Count: 470 |

Warning: Very brief mentions of gr**ming, mentions of an older man talking inappropriately to someone under age, trauma

Note: Hi DB! Sorry for the wait. It's always a struggle for me to jump back into my writing after not writing for a while. I also don't think I've written much for Rengoku as a whole, so I'm pretty rusty still. Regardless, I hope this provides you with even a drop of comfort after going though this kind of situation. I made it platonic since I wasn't sure what you wanted with that, and I also tried to make it fit the DS universe rather than modern time, it's just how I prefer to write for DS, so I hope that's okay! Thank you for your support <3 Hope you enjoy!

Rengoku:

Kyojuro is an upstanding man who looks to protect those under him

So when he found out about your situation in receiving letters from a man who was older than you–too old for you, he took action quickly

He could immediately sense what was wrong with the picture, an older man having inappropriate conversations with you, who was much younger, as if it was normal…

Many questions formed in his head. How did you get in this situation? Had you realized right away what was going on or did it start to feel wrong over time? Who was this guy anyway?

Seeing how shaken you looked speaking to him about it, Kyojuro took you in his arms in a tight hug, his warmth immediately consuming you

You were his student, someone he had sworn to protect and teach–how could he have not noticed this was happening?

He’s already looking for ways to track this man down to give him a stern talking to and making sure he doesn’t do this with anyone else, hoping to put a stop to it before the man decides to take things even further next time

“You’re okay. It’s unfortunate someone of his age has resorted to such gross techniques in conversing so graphically to someone under the age of consent,” he says with a sigh, gently patting your back as he continues to hug you.

“This isn’t your fault, Y/N. I failed as your superior to notice something was going on. I should have been more vigilant so you didn’t have to experience something like this. I will find him and ensure justice is restored. He’ll be locked away and known as an outcast in his village. This I vow to you.”

He’d pull away from the hug and glance at you with a smile, patting your head gently

As the man of justice that he is, just know he will track this guy down and make him pay for traumatizing you

From that moment forward, he’s more aware of the letters you receive, hoping it’s just from your family, or friends who were your age and you knew

Kyojuro becomes your support through the days moving forward, continuously reassuring you that you did nothing wrong and it was only the man’s fault for targeting someone who couldn’t tell what he was doing was inappropriate

Tells you countless times that you aren't dirty or ruined, you're still you, his precious student; his view on you has remained entirely that same

He does a great job at keeping your mind off it though. Taking you on strolls through nearby villages where he introduces you to some people closer to your age that you’d make great friends with, as well as being his joyful self

He makes you feel safe and secure, the light of his flame surrounding you almost as a shield, ready to burn anyone that even thinks about hurting you physically or mentally ever again

You’re in VERY capable, warm hands

Posted: 7/8/2024

[thatswhatsushesaid]

this person has me blocked, which is something i used to genuinely lament because occasionally i'd see bits of their very thoughtful commentary floating across my dash, and i'd find myself sighing sadly over what other gems of wisdom i was missing out on by not having access to their blog. i'd even lament about it via dms to some of my pals who did still have access to this person's blog. what interesting discussions must have been happening beyond that "???" "this is no one" "uh, who??" opaque door that tumblr always presented to me whenever i clicked on this person's username? would i ever know?

a friend this morning: want to see a bad take to get mad at

me: obviously yes

anyway as it turns out, it looks like i'm missing out on exactly nothing, actually, so that's a huge relief

more seriously, recalling the insightful commentary that i have seen this person reblog in the past when it has come across my dash, i am frankly in awe of this one, because it is so profoundly disconnected from reality and how people experience stories. like i'm not even sure where to start with peeling back all of the wrongness layers at work here because i haven't taken my adhd meds yet this morning, but the primordial stupidity at this take's core (coming from someone who is clearly smart, ftr, i am targeting the stupidity of the concept, not the person) has made me genuinely angry. it's not even just about applying this framework to mdzs, though of course it is principally about that because this book DOES actually place class front and centre at multiple points in the narrative. it's the idea that we just shouldn't be having conversations about classism, or sexism, or [x]-ism, in the romance genre, because don't we realize the point is the romance, actually?? these other things clearly don't matter and aren't worth talking about??? and this mindset is so utterly foreign to me because at no point have i ever felt compelled to stop myself from thinking thoughts about a book because "oh, but this is genre fiction, i need to turn my brain off to read and enjoy this, i forgot." or "this thought is not appropriate because genre fiction, i'd better stop thinking it before i ruin the story."

like. i am deeply, deeply sorry for this person, actually, that they are not picking up on precisely what mxtx is putting down in the text, especially considering mxtx has explicitly explored themes of class in at least two of her novels (i'll get back to you on including svsss once i've read it). but also, a critique of class in the jianghu, or how mxtx has written her female characters, is entirely as valid use of fandom time and energy as writing one more definitely original and not remotely repetitive thinkpiece on the power of wangx!an's morally good love to overcome all obstacles (not saying OP wrote any of these, just that there ARE a bunch of them out there).

like. why do you want to simplify the experience of reading and thinking and talking about these books? why do you want to push for more boring analysis of stories? why are you using your platform to encourage this? i'm so mad about it actually. people listen to you, and this is what you're encouraging them to do: think less.

[papermonkeyism]

I think I'm finally starting to recover, after a few years of artistic dry season.

The plague was a big hit, then losing my job and finally my social life collapsing once my IRL DnD group basically disbanded pretty much destroyed what creative juiced I had always lived on up to that point, and it's been HARD to just not having any desire to be creative or do anything.

But now that I have a job again, and have had it for long enough my bank account is stable, and having been adopted into a new DnD group that's active both in-game (weekly game sessions!) and outside of it (we actually talk and communicate generally as well! It's mostly online, but it's still more than I've had in years), I have started to feel more like myself again. That, and the brain meds. I can't overstate how big it is that my default doesn't have to be brain fog anymore.

Like, I'm doing evening doodles again? I'm actually having fun thinking up creatures and characters and plots again? I stopped carrying my sketchbook and pencil case with me everywhere I went during my dry stint of nothing, but now I actually feel like I'm missing it when I don't have it on me at times, like during coffee shop visits.

And I kinda... want to MAKE a thing again.

(Just thinking out loud again, pay no mind.)

I miss having a Project.

Jumping back into making fully plotted out comic feels a bit too much at this stage, though, so I probably won't dedicate myself wholely to something of that scale.

I don't know what exactly will be the final shape of Arcanth's eventual thing, but I'm currently enjoying myself in the fiddly worldbuilding stage. (And just so you know, in the slight off chance that I might maybe pick Wurr back up again some day, I probably won't tell you about it. After all this time and all the messages I've gotten, I don't trust you guys with that one anymore. Even if I would eventually get back to posting it online, it won't happen untill I have a full year's worth of buffer and that would still be a loooooooong way from now even IF I got back to it full time, and I still have that day job besides anyway.)

But what if...

I think an art book or a zine or something might be more achievable at this point.

I feel like the dinosaur project thingy needs some more fiddling with its eventual format (I know I already have enough concept doodles to fill a zine on its own, but I crave an excuse to go ham with watercolors and make full illustrations), but it's one option I still want to make eventually.

And I kinda want to do a slight redesign for the Singing People. (I bought a skull replica a while ago that had narrower snout than how I had drawn them. And I know it doesn't matter that much, and I can always invoke artistic licence and "they aren't necessarily supposed to be any specific real life dinosaur species, it could always go with the 'undiscovered' route if I feel like it and the Troodon/Stenonychosaurus material is super fragmentary anyway", but I'm pretty sure it would bother me anyway if I didn't at least try it out and see how it looked.)

Though I think I got an idea about what to do with Entica!

Those of you who've been here a while know that one started out as my pandemic project. The world had just shut down along with my job warehouse, things were still new and uncertain, and I suddenly had so much free time and not much to sink my creative juices into, and I wanted something low pressure to do.

So I dug up an old setting from my teenage years two decades ago, gave it a facelift, threw out my teenage baggage and just ran wild. No planning, no plot, just art.

The "no planning" part did get back to bite me when the morbs eventually hit and I finally ran out of the creative juices, but that's still a lot of very good material, right there, ready to use.

But I just thought of a new framing device that would work with the already existing material AND give the character more of a goal and agency to make plotting more fun! And I think I like it.

Instead of a random scribe with no background from a place I didn't bother designing who just wants to see the world, Didor now works for a library that has sent her on a mission [to document something and/or take a message to *place*]. She still wants to see the world, but now she has a background, goal and a motive to do so!

And instead of just hanging around at Maaro's cart while Maaro does her own unrelated thing, Maaro is actively helping in her goal! While also doing her job.

I feel that having Didor be on a field work mission would give it more structure while not having to technically retcon anything already existing, and gives more solid excuse to do things than "random encounter number 82" would. Also potential reasons for further adventures ("While you're already out there, could you maybe also do X on the way?")

Also I want to insert nawani in it earlier. I didn't even have them as part of the setting untill psrt way through, and I want to show them off more.

Maybe a travel journal, perhaps?

[chaoticneutralgood2627]

Advice to College Students (From someone who's trying to apply for a master's program)

Note that these are in no particular order and from my own particular experience. I will add if I think of more.

TAKE NOTES ON EVERYTHING, ESPECIALLY IF YOU FIND IT COOL: your brain will tell you 'I'll remember that fact, it's so neat!' Your brain is a BITCH. You will not remember SHIT. Take ALL the notes. If you can record your classes, even better!

Write down who your professors are for each class. Make a big document. All the years. Write them. Write down their vibes and if you like them. Write down what sort of assignments they gave. Because I'm over here trying desperately to remember which professors I had multiple classes with so I can beg them for recommendations.

Save your assignments. Even if they're horribly cringey. You can use this to gauge how far you've come. I know it hurts your soul. I have fanfic from when I was 12. Do it anyway.

When they tell you the grad school shit, pay attention. Even if you don't plan to go back to school. Because I didn't listen and now I have changed my mind and I have no recollection of that section of school.

Networking. Gather contacts from your classmates. If for no other reason than because you think they're intimidating and you don't want your LinkedIn to look depressing. They're probably just as intimidated by you. And if not, you can pretend they are.

College is not high school. Next to no one has friends at first. Everyone is a disaster. Talk to people. You might not find Your People in your first friend group. That's fine. There are people there somewhere that can make life less awful. The worst they can say is no, you can't be friends with us (and most people aren't that bitchy). The universe is big and no one is judging you harder than you are.

It's not that friends Can't Live Together, it's that people have different organization styles and needs for survival and sometimes those Do Not Mesh. If you're going to live with someone, make sure that you have talked about things.

Everything can go on a resume if you word it right. Editing a friend's paper? Congrats, you have editing and tutoring experience. Playing DND on weekends? Cooperation and teambuilding to work towards a common goal, sometimes in the face of creative differences (your friends want to Fight Everything and you want to Stay Alive (or reversed)). EVERYTHING CAN GO ON A RESUME.

There are so many resources on campus. Use them, for the love of god because then you're going to be an adultier adult and realize that there is not a med center right across the campus.

Find what motivates you. Mine is spite, I am applying to grad school to get out of retail and to spite 2 specific supervisors. Cling to that when you want to drop out and quit.

There is not a specific route to take in college. Or out of college. Listen to yourself rather than everyone's advice (I am aware that this is ironic to be on an advice post).

If you think you can wake up at 9 after like 4 hours of sleep, that is the devil talking to you. Go to bed.

On the same note. I am aware that you woke up at like 5 for high school. You will not want to exist before noon. 8 am classes are not illegal, but they should be.

Take care of yourself. You're paying a shit ton of money to be there, you can take an hour to eat the food. Plus, if you take care of yourself, then you will work better.

There will be weird shit happening all over. Just roll with it. Unless it's hurting someone or has the potential to hurt someone (my one friend got stalked).

You are not required to stay somewhere social if it's creeping you the fuck out or if you aren't comfy. I think I went to a single party in my entire college life and I hid in the corner with their illegal kitten the whole time.

Speaking of illegal kittens. If you know someone has an illegal kitten, no the fuck you do not. There probably will be at least one. And you do not know about it.

[fuckitupfelix]

its me again, hi! literally a few minutes ago i got stomach ache, so now that im lying in bed i wanna imagine what would it be like to be taken care of by hinata or kageyama, or anyone more you would think, maybe you could write it 🙏🙏 beforehand tysm 🥺

ahh nooo i hope your stomach ache got better 😭😭 i hope this was okay!!!!

tummy troubles </3

haikyuu!! x male reader

chars: hinata shoyo , kageyama tobio

FEM ALIGNED DNI

HINATA SHOYO — ★

now as much as i'd like to say he's got no clue what to do, he is an older brother that has definitely had to take care of natsu when she was sick, so he knows the drill. kind of.

water -> food -> rest

(he applies this to every illness/sickness/inconvenience. it always works.)

you need meds for your stomach pain? hinata's already halfway to the convenience store on his bike

he's torn between staying and making sure youre okay and getting some extra practice in . . .

-> it was a very hard choice, but he chose to stay with you <3

-> (he brought a volleyball with him so he could practice in your room)

checks in on you the next day!! either in person or over text :)

KAGEYAMA TOBIO — ★

kageyama is everything that hinata was not, unfortunately

he had to call his sister to ask what to do 😭

goes to your kitchen and pulls out every medication he could find and asks you which one you need

-> he points at any random one until you say yes..

-> "this one?" "no." "this one?" "no." "this one?" "no. . ."

he'll sit awkwardly on the edge of your bed until you tell him he can come closer

cause. . . yk. . . stomach aches aren't contagious. . .

you both just sit in your room together until you decide to go to bed

doesn't really think he has to check up on you the next day because he knows that you'd text him anyways :p

AGHH theyre so silly 💔

divider by @/plutism !!

[swarvey]

Enamored with Paper Rings right now. It’s written so, so well 🥺 Do you have any headcanons about meeting Harvey in college/taking over the farm years after that?

meeting harvey in college | harvey x gn!reader

summary -> after meeting harvey during college, the two of you hit it off right away, slowly growing to become more than friends.

a/n: ahhh tysm!!!! that means a lot <33 i hope you enjoy!! reader and harvey are at med school btw

harvey

the two of you met during freshman year of university while taking the same course

after being placed in the same group project together for the semester, you hit it off with him right away

harvey, though? it was pretty much love at first sight.

you best believe this man purposefully chose his seat near you because he thought you were cute. not that he'll ever tell you that

it didn't help that he was completely enamored with your personality

(nearly imploded the first time you laughed at one of his jokes)

knew he wanted to be with you pretty much right away, but he also didn't want to rush you

so, being the man that he is, he waited patiently until you were ready to express your own feelings before showing you how much he cares about you.

freshman year

"this is impossible," you groan, letting your head fall onto the mattress beneath you. "i quit."

harvey laughs, rolling his chair over to the bed and gently lifting you up by your hoodie. "unfortunately, you can't quit," he tells you, smiling at your frown. "the rest of our groupmates quit half a semester ago, so it's up to us to save our grades."

you sigh deeply as you force yourself to sit up, grabbing your laptop and pulling it onto your lap. as you begin to work — swearing under your breath about your "good for nothing groupmates" — harvey sneaks a look at you once in a while, admiring the way you bite your lip in thought and squint your eyes at the screen.

he wants to be with you, of course he does. he thinks any guy who doesn't should get schedule a check-up with their doctor, since they obviously aren't thinking straight. no, the problem isn't that he doesn't have feelings for you — it's that you can't seem to tell he does. while he knows he should use his time at college to explore and meet new people, he can't shake the fact that, to be frank, you're really the only one he can picture himself with.

"harvey, can you look at this? i swear this doesn't make sense."

"sure!" shaking out of his daydream, harvey sits beside you on the bed, trying not to pay attention to the way your arms are pressed against each other.

while others may move on after realizing their feelings aren't returned, harvey figures he doesn't mind waiting a little bit, especially if the reward is having you all to himself.

sophomore year

"how do i look?"

harvey turns to look at you as you emerge from your bedroom, bashfully showing off your halloween costume with a broad grin. you're dressed up as one of your favorite video game characters, your hair and make-up done perfectly by your friend. she stands next to you with a proud look on her face, eyes digging into his skull. he can basically hear her daring him to say you look bad.

"amazing," he voices, watching as she nods in satisfaction and walks away.

"honestly, harvs, you couldn't have been a little more creative?" you ask, tugging at his lab coat. "you realize we're in med school, right? so half the people we see tonight are going to be wearing this."

he shrugs, rubbing the back of his neck. "well, i couldn't think of anything else," he mumbles. "it's not like i'm trying to impress anyone, anyway."

you hum, nonchalantly fixing his collar and centering his stethoscope. "well, at least you look all cleaned up — maybe you'll catch someone's eye," you tease.

yet again, you don't notice how he stiffens, letting out a quick breath when your hands graze his neck. it's been a year now, and harvey has no idea how you haven't noticed his feelings for you. still, he's been patient, and he truly doesn't mind waiting; it's not like there's a downside, in his mind. the two of you have grown even closer since freshman year, even finding time to see each other during the summer.

"alright, ready?" you ask, grabbing the sides of his arms and laughing when he jumps. "geez, harvey, i know it's halloween, but you don't have to be so on edge. i'm here to protect you!" you cross your arms, feigning toughness.

"really?" he doubts, giving you a questionable look.

you nod, the air leaving your lungs when your friend pokes your side. "we're all doomed if you're supposed to save us," she jokes. you laugh as she starts pulling you to the door, calling for harvey to follow.

he barely hears her, though, hearing only your bright laughter and seeing only your amused eyes.

i can wait.

junior year

harvey is growing tired of this.

he watches helplessly as you talk to a senior — a senior who is clearly attracted to you, by the way — and allow him to pour you another drink. he scowls at the greedy look in his gaze, his eyes raking you up and down as you sip out of your cup. he knows you're clueless and remembers how excited you were to socialize at the formal, especially since this upperclassman is known to be at the top of his class, but truthfully?

he doesn't give a damn.

"oh, harvey!" you say, eyes brightening when he walks over. he doesn't even look at you as he grabs your arm, locking it with his. he can feel you staring at him, his ears burning with embarrassment as he faces the senior.

"what are the two of you talking about?" he asks, his hold on you tightening when the older student leans forward slightly.

"nothing of concern," he says, eyeing your hand clutching harvey's arm. "just some personal techniques i've learned over the years."

harvey's lips form a grim line on his face as he glares at him, the music playing in the background seeming to fade away. he can sense the intentions of the other student, knowing if he weren't there, he would be purposefully getting you drunk to do god knows what with you.

"we're leaving," harvey declares, "but thanks for sharing your insight with them. i'll be sure to ask all about it when we get back."

without another word, harvey drags you out of the room despite your small protests, focusing only on getting you away from the creep. he lets out a breath of relief as you make it outside, resting his hands on his knees for a moment before straightening to look at you with worry-filled eyes.

"what were you thinking?" he scolds, scanning you quickly as if checking for injuries. "can't you tell when someone is trying to take advantage of you? how much have you had to drink? here, take my jacket, it's getting chilly out—"

his words get caught in his throat when you lean forward and hug him tightly, your head resting on his chest.

"what would i do without you, harvey?" you quietly ask, pulling away to look at him with a gaze he's never seen before. "no one's ever cared about me like you, you know that?"

harvey clears his throat, looking away as he gently wraps his arms around you. "i think you had a little too much to drink," he says, attempting to pull you off. "i'll take you home, okay? we can talk more tomorrow—"

before he can finish his sentence, your lips are covering his, your arms now thrown around his neck as his hands find the small of your back. after a moment of shock, he's kissing you back, eyes shut as he pulls you closer to him.

when you break off, he looks at you with wide eyes, blinking as he registers what just happened. his cheeks are tinted red.

you yawn, grabbing his arm once again and leaning on him. "i'm tired," you mutter. "let's go home."

"r-right, let's get you to bed. we can talk about this after you get some rest." wordlessly, he begins to walk you home, hoping with his entire being that you won't forget this by the morning.

senior year

adrenaline rushes through harvey's body as everyone throws their caps into the air, celebratory horns blaring in his ears as everyone begins to file out of the stadium. he can hardly believe it's been four years already — it feels like it was just yesterday he was meeting you in class for the first time, already drawn in by your curious eyes.

after greeting his parents and taking some pictures with them, he promises to be right back before racing off to find you, his bouquet of flowers still in hand. he quickly searches the crowd, knowing you should be around this area, but is stopped in his tracks when you practically pounce on him.

"we did it!" you exclaim excitedly, swaying him from side to side. your family watches amusedly as he shyly waves at them. "we actually graduated, can you believe it?"

"well, i can believe i graduated," he teases. "i'm not sure about you."

"hey! i used my resources well throughout college, alright?" you defend, pushing him away lightly.

"i'm kidding." he pulls you to his side, quickly stealing a peck on your lips when no one's watching.

you sigh, looking down at the cap in your hands. "i can't believe it's over," you express. "it went by so fast."

he nods in agreement, watching as everyone celebrates with their families. "keep in mind, i spent nearly three of those years chasing after you."

"you never said anything!"

"did i need to? i'm sure everyone else knew except for you."

"and whose fault is that?"

"alright, enough fighting!" harvey's mom laughs, walking up to your family and greeting them. "let's take a picture of you two."

"ready?" his dad calls, angling his camera. "smile!"

after developing the photo a week later, harvey notices that, while you're brightly grinning at the camera, he's too busy smiling down at you, reveling in the fact that all his waiting didn't go to waste.

[naamahdarling]

I do want to say, because I know I am extremely and probably sometimes unfairly unforgiving of everything to do with the medical profession, that I had a really good experience last week with a team that was very empathetic and trauma-informed. The area of medicine is deeply triggering and I truly didn't know if I would even be able to talk or not. They were very understanding and respectful and I didn't feel like an inconvenience or a difficult patient, or like someone who was making a big deal out of nothing.

I know and they pointed out that I'm not the only person with this issue. This is actually common. It is utterly baffling to me that so many providers aren't able to cope with PTSD in their patients, especially patients whose trauma is medical in nature. These people treated me like a normal person who had experienced some very not-normal things.

Anyway, I had an unexpectedly hard time afterwards -- I figured the hardest part would be the appointment, and it super was not -- and have had a hard time off and on since. It has not been fun. It's been frustrating and confusing and upsetting and scary. But for once, none of that was the fault of the people I saw. I went in unsure I'd even be able to talk about it and nearly completely certain I wouldn't be able to move forward with the things I need to do. I figured I would probably have to white-knuckle it through a panic attack. I came out having held a productive conversation that left me scared, yes, but also hopeful and optimistic that I can move forward. And I didn't have a panic attack. It was a radical and unexpected change.

I worked hard for this. Any trauma is an awful thing to live with. The work of remaking yourself around the holes it punches in you is hard and confusing. The healing is often slow. In my case it comes with very few immediate rewards (it will actually make my life more difficult for a while because I'll have to deal with more medical interference, hooray). But it was time for me to do this and I have come far enough and worked hard enough to have the resilience to try, and I did it.

All we did was talk, but that would not have been possible a year ago. It was all I could do to ask for a referral because even naming the specialty was upsetting. I couldn't make the phone call to set up an appointment and when they called to try to do it, I hung up. Six or eight months ago I managed to dial the number and then hung up the instant someone answered. Last week I walked into the building and said out loud multiple words that make me feel like I have worms under my skin and which I can barely look at, let alone type. I didn't lose speech. This was a big win for me, and I'm thankful it went well, and I actually am proud of myself. I didn't even use any of my antianxiety meds that day, because I didn't think I would need them.

I don't feel grateful to the staff, I feel like someone finally did the bare fucking minimum, but I am very grateful, because I am not only what I feel. I am also what I know and what I do, and I am finally sort of getting those three things to match up in a way that they patch the holes in one another a little, and maybe someday I can stop slipping through the cracks.

I'm scared they will fuck up when I go to get some issues addressed, and they will betray me or harm me. I really am. Because hey, that's what my experiences have prepared me for, so that's a very natural way for me to feel. Rational, even.

I'm scared that I will look back at this appointment and feel stupid for having experienced any hope at all.

But even if it goes to shit, I still went in there and tried. I still did my best. And my best was okay. I was able to separate my fear from what needed to be done just a little bit. That means something. Because I didn't think I could do it at all.

[shankss-magnificent-ass]

Imagine becoming a part of the red hair pirate's disembarking procedure

Part 2 of this post (it's free to view on Patreon, you just need an account I think)

Benn: *talking to the whole crew* Alright, we're going onto an island we've never been on before, and one we're not sure if anyone has ever landed here. We have protocol for this, and it's paramount that you follow it to a T.

Shanks: *whispers* oh shit, you know he's serious when he breaks out the big words.

Yassop: *snickers*

Benn: I'm going to give you a refresher on the rules.... We use the buddy system, no one gets to shit without their buddy.

You: Just what I always wanted, a poop buddy.

Shanks: *puts his arm around your shoulders* the only time our synchronized bowel movements are a blessing.

You: *rolls your eyes* at least we won't have to fight over who gets to use the bathrooms first.

Shanks: now I get what I have always dreamed of, to hold your hand and look deep into your eyes while we poop.

You: *shudders in horror* You're so weird.

Shanks: *plants a wet kiss on your cheek*

Benn: Now would those of you assigned to the exploration party please line up at the gangway for departure.

You: *goes to help Hongo prep a med pack for the exploration crew*

Hongo: *once the kit is finished* They're going to want you to take it to them.

You: Uh, okay? *takes it out to see them waiting patiently in line for them.

Benn: Excellent *takes the med kit and straps it to his pack* Now time for our kiss goodbye. *Bends down, so his forehead is level with your face*

You: Really?

Benn: yes, now hop to it.

You: *rolls your eyes, but gives each of them a forehead kiss*

The next island

You: *Currently too sick and infectious for Hongo to allow the crew in the med bay to get their kisses goodbye*

The exploration team: *has a horrible time on the island*

After getting back to the ship and getting the hell off that island

Benn: we barely got out of there, Hongo, you really need to get them back on their feet before the next island.

Hongo: *patching up Benn's shoulder* who are you talking about?

Shanks: My partner, obviously, we have the worst luck without them around.

Hongo: I'm sorry my skills aren't enough for you

Shanks: It's not that you aren't enough, because I have absolute faith in your skills. It's just I always feel bad, like I'm wasting your time, when I have to come to you for treatment every single time we step off the ship. Also being hurt sucks, if we can prevent it before that happens that'd be way better for everyone. I mean wouldn't you rather be conducting that research you've been working on for years?

Hongo: ....fair point, I'll have them up and at 'em as soon as possible. I'll also come up with some protocol to get y'all access even while they're sick.

Benn: how are you gonna manage that?

Hongo: *shrugs*I'll probably just stick 'em in a hazmat suit or something.

In the Port at the next island

You: *finally feeling better*

Hongo: I'm going to go refill my herb stores, I'll be back before dusk. *kisses you on the forehead, and presents his to you*

You: do I have to? I'm still sure this is how I got sick in the first place.

Hongo: *pulls out a pack of disposable alcohol pads, disinfects his forehead, and presents it again*

You: *sighs, but gives him a peck anyway* Buy more disinfectant while you're out, since y'all have convinced yourselves that I'm magic.

Hongo: *nods and walks down the gangplank to the dock*

Benn: We haven't decided you're magic, you know.

You: Oh really? Because you act like the world will crush you if you leave without me pressing my lips to your forehead.

Benn: It's not like that, it *growls in frustration*... we've noticed a pattern and most of us would rather not risk breaking that pattern. Okay, so suck it up and pucker up *pointing at his forehead and giving you his serious face*

You: *slaps one of the alcohol pads at his face.* Clean your oily forehead of yours first, I ain't gonna kiss it when it's clammy and gross.

Yassop: *laughs* you might need to give him two, since he's got such a big ass head.

Benn: *scoffs* Your forehead is bigger than mine, and where are you going?

Yassop: Deviating from the pattern, later. * steps off the gang plank and falls through the first dock plank he steps on, hitting his balls on the support beam, and gets slapped in the face by the other end of the plank before falling into the ocean*

The Crew present: *groan in sympathy as they protectively cup their own genitals*

Benn: dumbass

You: he doesn't learn, does he?

Shanks: Not quickly, he'll need to hurt himself a few times before it clicks.

You: ....we should make bets

Benn: two thousand on him falling down a flight of stairs next.

Shanks: You're on.

You: that's awful... and wrong, he's gonna get attacked by something in the water, and I'll bet ten thousand on it.

Coming Soon

[sleepyboywrites]

Creepypasta Fluff Headcanons for Trans!Male Reader Pt. 1 (Being a boy on his Period)

Because it's nearing that time again and being a boy on his period sucks ass. I'm making this to provide some comfort! For myself as a trans man and hopefully you too. This takes place with established and healthy relationships. Or as healthy as relationships with these characters come.

Tw: Possessive behavior, not necessarily wanted affection, rough contact, references to slight verbal abuse.

Eyeless Jack

• Run. Run right in the opposite direction if he hasn't eaten in a bit/is agitated. You will make him hungry due to his blood lusting demonic nature and he's not very friendly when he's hungry.

• You already aren't feeling great so if you go to him in that state anyways expect to be more uncomfortable albeit supported as a half-apology.

• If he has been satiated and is calm you may proceed to tell your demonic boyfriend that your cycle has begun and you are distressed and dysphoric about it.

• Cuddle bug. Like sits you directly into his lap and burries his face in your neck. Telling you words of encouragement. Think "I'm so sorry Baby boy." and "You're so strong y/n. One of the strongest men I know, I mean other men can't live through bleeding for 4-7 days on average."

• He's a med student so he knows the best ways to help with cramps and the physical pains that come with a menstrual cycle.

• He also gives you high testosterone foods and encourages you to wear one of his shirts and your boxers over your underwear to help with the dysphoria aspect. But he won't let you bind if your chest area gets sensitive.

• Tries to distract you and keep you as comfortable as possible

• Extremely protective during this time. He has a lot of self control but his instincts are still spiking under the surface screaming at him to lock you up/protect you. His emotional attachment to you paired with his constant hunger leave him clinging to your side and glaring at anyone else who approaches/gives you a weird look. Attacking anyone who hurts you emotionally or otherwise.

• Honestly a bit feral in a way akin to nesting.

• Insists on taking walks together once a day.

Laughing Jack

• A bit confused at first in his eyes he has erased any of your perceived biological imperfections.

• Hits you with the "But you are a boy" when you tell him you're feeling dysphoric and crying. "One who's very very important to me as well so please don't cry."

• Gives you your favorite candies and sweets

• Rubs your back when you're curled over in pain and sings you songs to help you calm down.

• Takes you to his amusement park and takes you on all your favorite rides and shows you all your favorite shows

•Always introducing the act as "Dedicated to the best boy in the world/my Favorite boy."

• Essentially his mentality is "I'm going to make sure this boy has so much fun he forgets the torment of having his brain stuck in the wrong body."

• And it fucking works. He has you laughing so hard that you can't tell where the stomach ache ends and the cramps begin.

• He likes to play "dress-up" in the sense where he has an array of gender affirming costumes and each day he insists you choose from the extensive array because even if you don't feel well at the moment doesn't mean you have to be reduced to a puddle of stained oversized clothes. He was always one for theatrics.

• If you say you really aren't up to dressing up he'll bring out an array of hoodies, baggy tees, shorts, sweats, or jeans instead.

• Genuinely just trying to distract and cheer you up

Ben Drowned

• Pretends to not know what you're talking about or why you're so upset. "Bro I assure you no one cares?" Followed by a long silence as he stares at you followed with "We all still view you the same, man."

• Then promptly refuses to leave your side

• Think anything from lurking in nearby electronics to straight up following you around everywhere.

• If a mission comes up he'll take you with him and make up some sort of excuse like he needs your help and your avatar is better abled than you physically. Alternatively if you have a mission he'll grab you and say he's coming with, before dragging you with him.

• Makes sure everyone is careful around you. No roughhousing or insults. Not at this time even if you protest.

• You had to break up a fight with the intent to maim once because Jeff had called you a "Pussy" in an attempt to agrivate you to change your mind about not being up for training today. Ben who had been lurking nearby lunged at him and you had to break the two apart.

• So much Gatorade. This boy makes you drink so much Gatorade.

• He also has a collection of snacks you normally crave and hoodies specifically for you in his closet.

• Let's you bind during your period until you don't take it off on time or act like you're in pain then he will take and hide it until it's passed.

• if you complain about dysphoria he'll roll his eyes as he drags you to his realm where your avatar already matches your gender and have you hang out there.

• Naptimes are mandatory once a day during this week because he knows it takes a lot out of you.

• Reminds you to take showers despite how much you hate having that reminder because you'll feel better afterwards and it helps with the cramps.

Jeff the Killer

• I promise he's trying. He's trying to keep things as normal as possible by being a jokey asshole dick like usual.

• Mans has your cycle engraved in his memory so on the first and worst day when you're at your grumpiest without fail he'll go "Can't you just give me a bloody smile god damn it?"

• You know he's joking and he knows he's joking but without fail you'll mock laugh at him, sock him in the nose, and walk away.

• One time you ran out of products and Jeff went to get them for you he called from the store and went, "Hey man, what size cunt do you have?" You shook your head, called him an asshole, and hung up.

• He tried to apologize by calling and texting and when you wouldn't answer he made you a care basket with hot wheels and various manly items such as boxers and button-ups/baggy tees. He also covered the pads wrapping in dinosaurs. And replacing "girl" with "boss" on the labels

• He's made a habit of getting you one of these everytime your supplies run out.

• Insists on more training and fighting because what better way to blow off steam and frustrations than a good ol fashioned fight.

• One time it went too far and the two of you ended up being patched up by EJ who scolded the two of you and said "If I catch you boys doing this again I will make sure Slender needs two new proxies."

• Always carrying ibuprofen and water. Always.

• Rubs your back if it hurts too much and treats you more gently.

•Will attack and maim anyone who misgenders you.

Homicidal Liu

• Liu is already constantly holding your hand as if he's scared you'll disappear, like the rest of good in his life, so you two are fairly well synced and sometimes you swear he can read your mind.

• You keep him calm, in a way that reminds him of before the incident because of this he knows all of you, obsessed over it and memorized it, including when your cycle is, it's linked in his internal clock.

• You'll often wake up to a warm bath and clean comfortable clothes if your cycle started during the night. While you bathe he'd change and wash the sheets then bring you breakfast to eat together after you finish.

• Tells you he's sorry that your body doesn't match your mind as he nuzzles into your neck. Snaking his arms around your waist and engulfing you in his weight. Sometimes uncomfortable but you know by now if you try to pry him off he'll only tighten his grip and agressively albeit incoherently mumble

•calm and supportive/protective and possessive are how his alters have always treated you. Both affectionate sometimes overly so. Heightened during your cycle due to you being in a more easily hurt and in a distressed mood.

• Think overlap of Liu and Sully's voices, "What did you just say to my boyfriend?" Followed by "You'll pay for that." should anyone so much as look at you funny in a way that'll make you feel worse about your current state of being.

• Said anyone would be carried away in a body bag. <333

• Gets you trinkets as well as anything you may be craving.

• Owns heating pads as well as cold pads at his disposal to help with cramps.

• Water/Gatorade and a variety of pain meds on hand. Always.

• Doesn't want to leave your side out of fear of you running into a less than kind individual without him there to support you and maim your instigator.

Ticci Toby

• You'd have to go to him about it because his ass doesn't know. His brain is on fifteen different topics at any given time. You occupy at least five but he doesn't have much memorized.

• He'll know that something is bothering you but won't know what unless you blatantly tell him.

• Once you do he'll probably try his best to limit his roughness/aggression and increase softer touches/tones.

• Much more pet names a lot less insults. IE: Instead of calling you a dumbass he'll call you pretty boy.

• If he gets frustrated expect said pet name to be said with aggression.

• He owns several weighted blankets he'd offer you to use on top of his own body weight when he flops onto you, should you want that affection. Though he still will with a piss-poor excuse of an apology if you don't and he does. Which he does frequently because you're one of the only people whose touch is gentle with him.

• Bad about carrying liquid. Good about carrying meds. So if you need an ibuprofen he will give you one but you'll need to either dry swallow or find liquid elsewhere.

• Also not the best at comforting you through your pain seeing as he doesn't experience that kind of thing himself. At least not in the same way, so he doesn't know what to do nor what you expect from him.

• He'll pick you up something he thinks you'll like when he goes out during this time but that ranges from "really sweet" to "the thought is what counts." Because sometimes his thoughts cross paths one too many times and he accidentally got you cleaning supplies instead of menstrual or edible treats.

• Think: "This rock made me think of you. Do you like [insert candy], because I grabbed some on my last mission. I meant to grab you strawberry mentos, because of a song I heard that made me think of you but accidentally grabbed menthol instead, I don't know how you'd use it but here."

• Essentially when you tell him he'll say "Okay, don't push yourself too hard." And then continue fairly normally while attempting to be nice.

Brian/Hoodie

• Initial reaction depends entirely on where/how you tell him. If you tell him in public in front of others he will simply look at you and say, "...okay".

• If you tell him in private he'll stare at you for a moment and then he'll give you a few well-thought-out sentences on how he'll be there to help and how you aren't any less of a man.

• If you give him a note or written thing however he will build you a cathedral out of paragraphs telling you that he'll do what he can to make you feel as good as you can, how this aspect doesn't change who you are not how you're received, and everything masculine and in general he adores about you.

• Always has water, meds, and a spare hoodie for you in close proximity.

• Doesn't treat you any differently in public or private.

• Very sweet most of the time, including this, minus his aggressive outbursts.

• It's very much the same old same old. He'll still melt into you and expect the same he'll still yell and throw things when he's having a n outburst.

• He'll still treat you as softly and as roughly as he does the rest of the time.

• Will get you your cravings if you ask but he won't really if he's unprompted.

• He may ask for your hand more often if he notices your distress/squeeze your hand more often.

• Though most of the time he won't he's too busy in his head or in what he's doing.

• Or alternatively trying to figure out what is in your head and what you're doing but not necessarily how you're feeling.

• He cares about you he's just not the possessive type in the way that leads to outwardly or intense displays of affection. Though if you even hinted to not wanting to be around people on your cycle you wouldn't be. He would hole up.with you until its over and be reluctant to let you go.

Tim/Masky

• Throws his reeking bomber jacket at you with a raised eyebrow. "Things like this provide some comfort right?"

• Cocky Bastard knows it's in his god-damn calendar and he likes to inadvertently let you know he knows.

• IE: throwing one of your favorite snacks at your head while you train or work.

• Bringing you water, Gatorade, and medicine to you when all you did is hold your head in your hands for five seconds.

• It's become almost a game of whether or not you can get away without him knowing.

• Mocking you lightly if you ask for help with anything. If you need supplies, or would like one of your cravings, or would like a heating pad anything. And you say, "Hey could you get me [blank] if you don't mind?" Or anything along those lines you will be met with an, "Ah ah ah pretty boy, say pretty please." When he returns with what you asked for dangling it out of reach.

• Also always asks for a kiss as payment for being your knight in shiny armor. When he gets you anything. One time he bought you a bag of chocolate kisses you were craving and when he asked you threw a chocolate at him and he chased and tackled you until you gave him an actual one.

• Deliberately and as a rule of thumb, Masky shows you a playful and cocky side he's created because you respond to it best.

• He rarely gets angry at you but when he does that anger translates to avoiding you and not speaking to you should he be in this state he will give you nothing, not even a hug during this.

• If you tend to be touch-starved during he'll be less likely to fall into that angry rut but if you're touch-adverse he's more likely to get into angry ruts because he'll take it as the front he crafted for you not being enough or attractive to you.

• Despite the fact it has nothing to do him and has everything to do with you being in physical and psychological pain.