#awkward sirius black

[engie-ivy]

Hi! I really like your writing, could you possibly write a fanfic where Remus is a confident gorgeous bastard and Sirius is a flustered mess?

(Hi @arcades-n-academia! You might not even remember this request, with how long it took me to answer. I guess it took some time for a good idea to come to me, and then to find time to actually write it? I would say I hope it's worth the wait, but with how long the wait was that might be pushing it😅 Anyway, without further ado, I present to you:

Confident Gorgeous Remus Lupin and Flustered Mess Sirius Black!)

Being handsome, smart and successful, Remus has his choice of men. So he's allowed to have standards, right? And he has a type, namely confident and intelligent men who know what they are doing. Unfortunately, Sirius Black, easy on the eyes as he might be, is none of those things.

Or so Remus thought.

A New Side

Remus is feeling quite chipper. He's walking down the street carrying two boxes with cake from his favourite bakery, on his way to the office where he worked for the past year.

Remus is a renowned environmental scientist, but he took a break from that line of work to join an environmental law firm. He had wanted to learn more about the legal side of protecting the environment. What arguments are the big corporations using to deny accountability for the pollution they are causing? What data can these environmental lawyers use to prove these corporations are responsible? What evidence of the consequences for the environment is sufficiently compelling to a judge?

In return for learning the ropes of environmental law, Remus has been serving as an expert witness in their cases, and has consulted on scientific matters.

All in all, it has been a good year. Remus had a great time at the company, they made him feel at home and he truly learned a lot. But while he's going to miss the people, hard-working and dedicated to making the world a better place, he's excited to go back to his true passion: scientific research. He's got plenty of ideas, and he's excited to re-join his research team and get started.

Last Friday was officially his last day at the law firm, and since he's still got one week off before he'll take up his old job again, he's dropping by the office today to bring some cake and thank them for the past year.

As Remus pushes open the door, the first person he's greeted by is, unfortunately, Gilderoy Lockhart.

Alright, maybe when he says 'hard-working and dedicated to making the world a better place', that doesn't include everyone.

Lockhart doesn't particularly care about making the world better, he cares more about creating an image of himself as someone who is making the world better. He wants that aesthetic of a handsome, noble lawyer fighting for the good cause. Without doing the actual work, that is. Lockhart is known for doing nothing while taking credit for everything.

They would've kicked him out, if he didn't have a talent for charming people. Especially middle-aged women appear to be quite fond of him. Middle-aged women with too much money looking for a good cause to support. So since Lockhart is so proficient in bringing in donations, they continue to tolerate him.

"Lupin," Lockhart smiles. "Well, isn't today your lucky day."

'Because after today I never have to see you again?' Remus wants to say, but he holds it back. No, he went an entire year without clashing with Lockhart, he's not going to ruin it now. So he forces a smile. "And why is that, Lockhart?"

"Because today is the day you're getting the chance to go on a date with me," Lockhart smirks.

Remus blinks. "Sorry?"

"Yes, you heard that right," Lockhart says, still smirking. "You get to go on a date with me."

"That's… flattering, I suppose, but I'm sorry," Remus shakes his head. "I'm not interested."

Lockhart is silent for a moment, then he lifts his chin and tightens his jaw. "See for yourself then, Lupin. Your loss."

"Remus, you gotta help us out."

Fabian and Gideon have stopped him in the hallway.

"We keep arguing about it," Fabian says.

"So we need you to decide," Gideon adds.

"We usually don't go for the same guy, so this is new to us," Fabian sighs.

"We can't agree upon which one of us gets to ask you out, so we decided to leave it up to you," Gideon shrugs.

"So you need to tell us, Remus," Fabian urges.

"Which one of us would you rather go out with?" They both ask at the same time.

Remus looks from one brother to the other. "I like you both, as good friends."

Fabian cringes and Gideon dramatically places a hand over his heart. "Autch."

"Oh, come on," Remus says. "You can't expect me to choose one of you to date! That's just asking for trouble. Believe me, this is for the best."

"Alright, we normally don't go there, but since it's you, we are willing to make an exception," Fabian says.

"So what about dating both of us at the same time?" Gideon asks.

"Bye, Fabian! Bye, Gideon!" Remus starts to walk away. "Nice catching up with you!"

"You don't know what you'll be missing out on!" Fabian, or maybe Gideon, calls after him.

Benjy keeps nervously fiddling with his tea bag. "So… ehm, I mean, like, we won't see each other at work anymore, and I just thought… I hoped… I wanted to ask… If you don't mind, of course, maybe we could see each other outside of work? You know. Like dinner. If you like to have dinner. With me."

Remus stops from where he had been going through the cabinets of the office kitchen looking for cake forks to look at Benjy. "Oh, Benj… That sounds lovely, really. But truthfully, I'm not looking for anything right now, so it's probably best not to, as I don't want to give you the wrong idea."

It's not exactly true. Remus is quite open to someone storming into his life and sweeping him off of his feet, but Benjy isn't the 'storming in and sweeping you off of your feet'-type. He's the 'carefully shuffling in and awkwardly stammering if he may perhaps attempt to sweep you off of your feet'-type. Not that he isn't a great guy. Remus is sure that there's someone out there who's going to look at Benjy and see him worrying his lip and nervously wringing his hands, and think it's just the cutest thing ever.

But that someone isn't Remus. He needs a man who has a bit more fire in him.

After avoiding an awkward situation with Caradoc Dearborn, by pretending to think the flowers Dearborn gives him are only to thank him for his work in the past year, and Dearborn luckily takes the hint and plays along, Remus runs into Kingsley. At first, Remus is relieved that it's just his work buddy Kingsley, but when Kinsley leans against the wall beside him and gives him that smile, he knows enough.

"No, Kingsley," he says firmly. "No. We are friends. We work well as friends. We are not going to change that."

Kingsley lets his head fall against the wall and lets out a dramatic sigh. "You are a cruel, cruel man, Remus Lupin," he says, but he's smiling as he pushes himself off of the wall. "Well, it was worth a try, but I know a lost cause when I see one."

Remus lets out a relieved sigh as he closes the door to the break room behind him. Mary from Communications, Marlene the Office Manager and Lily from HR look up from their coffee.

"Oh my god!" Mary jumps to her feet and runs up to him. "Cake!" She exclaims, snatching the boxes from his hands.

"Happy to see you too, Mary," Remus says, rolling his eyes.

Mary sits down and flips open one of the boxes. "White chocolate pistachio! You're my hero."

Remus drops down on a chair with a sigh. "Has Mary brought her 'special' brownies to the office again?"

Mary glares at him, swallowing down a mouth full of frosting. "That happened once and it was an accident!" She says. "I took the wrong batch with me."

"I'm not complaining," Marlene smirks. "Best day I've ever had at the office."

"What makes you think the whole office is on drugs?" Lily asks Remus. "Again," she adds, almost as an afterthought.

"Just on the way here," Remus says. "Like, six co-workers asked me out!"

Marlene laughs. "Of course they did!"

Lily leans forward, resting her head on her hands. "Come on, Remus. You must know what's going on."

Remus blinks at her. "I promise you that I really do not."

"This company has a strict No Dating-Policy for its employees," Lily says. "But as of today, you," she points her finger at Remus. "Are no longer an employee."

"Which means…" Remus begins.

"Which means that all those thirsty men who have been lusting after you for the past year can finally shoot their shot!" Mary finishes.

Remus looks at Lily, but she just points at Mary and nods.

"It's true, Rem," Marlene says. "I almost had to ask the janitor to mob the floor in the meeting room after each of your presentations, with how much those guys were drooling!"

"And who can blame them?" Mary says, before Remus can protest. "You, standing there, with that casually tousled hair going on, wearing that button-up with the top buttons undone and your sleeves rolled up to your elbows, talking about critical deposition values, just oozing that whole 'Sexy Professor'-vibe…"

"There's nothing sexy about critical deposition values!" Remus protests, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Say critical deposition values one more time," Mary says, throwing her head back and letting out a fake moan.

Remus flicks a pistachio at her head. "You're a menace."

Mary sticks out her tongue and takes another bite of cake.

Remus shakes his head. "Good god, if that is the case, in retrospect, I'm very thankful for that No Dating-Policy. At least now I only have to endure this awkwardness for one day."

"Two days," Lily corrects. "You have to come to the office party this Friday!"

Remus raises his eyebrows. "Party? Are we celebrating?"

A huge grin appears on Lily's face. "Indeed we are! We won the case against Exxon!" She cheers.

Remus stares at her. "The case against… No way!"

"Way!"

Remus laughs out loud. "Oh my god! That's amazing! I can hardly believe it! I thought that case was mostly symbolic? That we didn't have a chance at actually winning?"

"So did I!" Lily exclaims.

"So did everyone!" Mary exclaims.

Marlene shakes her head with a huge grin on her face. "But don't tell Sirius he can't do something!"

"Wait," Remus says. "Back up. Sirius? As in Sirius Black?"

"No, Remus. One of the many other Siriuses that work here," Lily deadpans. "Yes, Sirius Black! Why does that surprise you?"

"No reason, just…" Remus shrugs awkwardly. "Well, he isn't exactly the sharpest tool in the shed, is he?"

All three girls stare at him like he has grown two heads.

"Remus," Lily eventually manages to say. "I don't know what kind of tools you have in your shed, but in most sheds, they don't come much sharper than Sirius Black. He graduated top of his year from Harvard Law, he takes on the most challenging cases from all our lawyers, and still manages to win more cases than any of the other lawyers, our biggest clients almost always request for him by name to represent them, and he receives about five offers per week from corporate offices willing to pay him at least five times what we can afford." She shakes her head. "We're lucky he's so dedicated to the cause, otherwise we would never have been able to keep him.

Remus blinks. "Really? Okay. Wow. That's… not what I expected."

The first time Remus saw Black, their conversation went something like this:

"Hi! I'm your new colleague, Remus Lupin. Nice to meet you!"

"Uh, yeah."

"So… what kind of work do you do?"

"I… ehm, I work for an environmental law firm."

"...Yes. I know. We're colleagues. I mean what sort of work do you do within the firm?"

"Oh, yes, I work in environmental law. I do law work. For… the environment."

"Right."

After that conversation, Remus had concluded that, despite what his first name might suggest, Sirius Black wasn't exactly a bright light. Their following conversations had only confirmed his suspicions.

"Hey Black. That's quite a stack of papers you're carrying. Big case?"

"Oh, no, just a normal briefcase fits fine."

"Oh, Black, can I get your opinion on the presentation I gave at the meeting this morning? What did you think of the slides?"

"I loved them! They were nice!"

"Yeah, thanks, but were they clear enough?"

"Oh, yes! I could see them very well. With the blue background and white letters. Very clear."

"No, I mean… You know what, nevermind."

Remus had assumed that Black, not being the sharpest mind, must be some sort of an assistant to the lawyers, searching files, copying documents, writing minutes, that sort of work.

Remus also thought, and he's rather ashamed to admit this, that maybe they employed Black because of his father, the infamous cut-throat corporate lawyer Orion Black. Maybe they thought that Orion Black would go a bit more easy on them when meeting them across the courtroom if his son worked for them. Though if that was the case, it was to no avail. If anything, Orion Black seems even more determined to take their firm down any chance he gets.

Remus even thought, and yes, he's even more ashamed to admit this, that the only reason they kept Black around could be because the man is so easy on the eyes.

"So, what made you think Sirius is a dummy?" Mary asks cheerfully.

"I've been trying to get to know him, but it's hard to learn more about someone when they can't hold a bloody conversation," Remus says defensively. "I swear, every time I try to talk to him, the guy can barely string a sentence together!"

The girls are silent for a moment. Then they all burst out laughing.

"Oh my god," Marlene says, wiping tears from her eyes. "I can't believe it. Sirius Black, with his infamous sharp tongue, who always has a retort for everything and can make even the most ruthless corporate lawyer tremble with fear, finally at a loss for words, because of a cute guy!" She laughs again. "I'm never going to let him hear the end of this, I swear!"

"As any good friend should," Mary says approvingly.

Remus looks puzzled.

"Come on, Remus," Lily grins. "With your experience from today, I think it's pretty clear why Sirius’ brain turns to mush around you!"

"So," Remus says slowly. "Black is actually both very intelligent and very into me?"

"He sure is."

Remus sits back on his chair and takes a sip of his coffee. "Interesting."

Remus is hiding in a corner. Not how he usually acts at parties, but he's got a very good reason. Two very good reasons actually.

First, it's so that he won't continuously get hit on, with people making flirtatious comments, bringing him drinks or making not-so-subtle suggestions of what they could do after the party now that they're no longer co-workers.

Second, it's so he can observe Sirius Black without Sirius Black knowing he's observing him.

Because Remus is intrigued.

Sure, he did find Black attractive. No one who sees him can deny that he's a good-looking man. But Remus never considered him as someone he'd potentially want to date.

Remus likes intelligent men. Maybe that's pretentious, but it's just how it is. He's attracted to men whom he can have stimulating conversations with, who challenge him and keep him on his toes, who he can share ideas with. Black seemed to be none of those things, so Remus had never looked at him like that.

Tonight, though, Remus is looking.

Black is, of course, the star of the evening. The whole party is to celebrate his achievement, after all. He looks stunning in his dress shirt and his long hair tied up. Everybody wants to talk to the man of the moment, and Black is making rounds, going from group to group, smiling brightly and making easy conversation with everyone. He looks confident and at ease, oozing charisma and competence.

Remus hadn't felt any particular way about the fidgety Sirius Black stumbling over his words, but this Sirius Black… This is a Sirius Black he would like to see more of. There's just something incredibly sexy about a confident man who knows what he's doing, and knows he's doing it well.

Black is currently chatting to the Bones-siblings– Amelia and Edgar are from the prestigious Bones family, known for their philanthropy and welfare work, and both are highly educated and strongly dedicated–, and Peter Petttigrew and Emmeline Vance. Vance is a tall, blond woman, who works for a pharmaceutical company and with whom they once had to negotiate a settlement with. Peter was quite infatuated with her, and keeps inviting her to these types of events, hoping to get with her, though everyone can see Vance has no real interest in him besides his connections.

Remus doesn't know whether Vance likes to play devil's advocate, or whether she's really defending her beliefs, but she's always taking opposing stances and arguing with everyone from the firm. Remus supposes she thinks having a different opinion makes her special and interesting, by showing she's not like the rest of them naive ideologists, but Remus disagrees. Sometimes, having a different opinion just makes you wrong.

Vance brushes her long, blond hair back. "You drive a motorcycle, right?" She asks Black. "Which means you need fuel. You can attack Exxon, but at the same time, you're one of the consumers creating the demand they're providing." She crosses her arms over her chest, looking quite smug.

Black arches an eyebrow. "I try to make the world a better place, whilst not being perfect myself, yes."

"Well, doesn't that make you…"

"A hypocrite?" Black finishes.

Vance shrugs.

"No one can do everything right. If trying to do good while you know you will sometimes get it wrong makes you a hypocrite, then not even trying to do any good only because you know you can't do everything makes you a cynic." Black crosses his arms over his chest and looks Vance in the eyes. "And then I'd rather be a hypocrite than a cynic."

"And you think bringing a company to the verge of bankruptcy with such an erratic fine is 'doing good'?" Vance asks. "If you take speeding, for instance, people don't speed because they know what fine they'll have to pay when they do. The fine Exxon has been given, however, is unprecedented. Therefore, Exxon couldn't have taken it into account when deciding upon their actions. Therefore, it is unfair." She looks quite pleased with herself.

Black does not look impressed with her argumentation, though. "We fine Exxon because we want them to not pour a gallon of crude oil over a baby seal," he says. "Not because we want to enable them to conduct a detailed cost-benefit-analysis on the strategy of pouring a gallon of crude oil over a baby seal! If they don't like that the consequences are unpredictable, good. It's a punishment, they're supposed to not like it."

"But you can't let such a vital company face the threat of bankruptcy!" Vance persists, clearly trying to get under Black's skin.

Black shrugs. "You're the one who started drawing parallels with criminal law. Alright, but then let's be consistent. What's the highest price someone can pay for the worst crime? It's their actual life. Now, Exxon has destroyed ecosystems, destroyed the lives of hundreds of people, and killed countless wildlife. It doesn't get much worse than that, so what would be the corporate equivalent of having to pay with your life? Bankruptcy indeed, if you follow your own logic."

"But do you really think Exxon is going to pay up?" Edgar Bones asks carefully. "I mean, Exxon has got an whole army of the best lawyers at their disposal. They can keep appealing the verdict to a higher and higher court, and keep stalling the process. The plaintiffs will be broke and forced to give up any further legal proceedings before they ever see a dime."

"If Exxon wants to drag this process out for years," Black replies instantly. "Then I will be breathing down their neck every single day for as long as it lasts and make sure they won't get a moment of rest from this case until they pay up! If we let them get away with this, simply because they have more means, it'll send a message to all companies like them that they can do whatever they want and no one will hold them accountable."

"But they won't be able to afford your services anymore."

"I don't want any money, not until the plaintiffs have been paid what they are due," Black says passionately, balling his fists.

"I suppose it's good exposure for your brand," Vance contemplates. "Being the activist lawyer engaged in a legal battle with Exxon."

Black gives her a hard look. "Some things aren't about money, or exposure. Some things just matter."

Remus stares at Black. That unwavering conviction, that fierce determination… It does something to him. Seeing that burning passion in his eyes, it makes something stir in Remus' stomach.

Remus chugs the rest of his his wine and places the empty glass on a passing waitress' tray, before making his way over to the group.

"Professor Lupin!" Vance says, batting her eyelashes at him. "Always good to see you."

"Hi Remus," Edgar Bones says warmly, giving Remus a quick once-over. "Glad you decided to come tonight."

"Yes, hi," Remus says, without taking his eyes off of Black, whose mouth is opening and closing like a fish without any words coming out. "Could I steal the man of the moment for a bit?" He asks, winking at Black. "To congratulate him on his big win."

Vance looks from Remus to Black and back. "Figures," she mumbles, before brushing her blond hair back and stalking off.

"Oh, I was hoping…" Edgar Bones begins.

"Of course, Remus," Amelia Bones interrupts, grabbing her brother's arm and dragging him away. "Come on, Ed. Let them have a moment."

"I hope I wasn't interrupting anything important?" Remus asks sweetly, smiling at Black.

Black's face flushes. "No! No, nothing important! Just talking about… how you should be a hypocrite, and how you can calculate the benefits of pouring oil on a baby seal, and how my clients will go bankrupt paying me…"

Remus arches an eyebrow.

Black cringes at himself, and covers his eyes with his hand, groaning. "Oh god, I swear… I swear, I'm actually smart!" He says. "I have more than two brain cells! I swear I do! The rest just somehow… switches off when it comes to you."

Remus throws his head back and lets out a genuine laugh. "Well, I guess it's good then that I'm not some corporate lawyer on the other side of the courtroom," he teases.

"It wouldn't have mattered then," Black mutters, crossing his arms over his chest.

Remus frowns. "How so?"

"I like how dedicated you are to your research," Black explains. "It's not just a job to you, you actually care. The way you talk about an exciting new research idea," a spark appears in Black's eyes as he talks. "With that contagious excitement, and always so hopeful, no matter how bad the world can be, that we can make it better. There's a fire and a passion to you." Black seems to realize he's been rambling, and he shrugs awkwardly. "I hardly would've been impressed to the point of my brain shutting down if you had been using that fire and passion to defend some bank's right to invest their client's money in cutting down the rainforest."

Remus stares at him.

He was not expecting this. His face feels warm, and- God, is he blushing? He can't remember the last time he blushed!

He thought Sirius liked him because he's handsome and successful. Many people do. But Sirius has seen him, and likes him for the kind of person he is. Remus feels something stir again, but this time not in his stomach, but higher, in the chest-area.

He gives Sirius a warm smile. "Thank you," he says sincerely, and then he laughs. "What can I say? Some things just matter."

Sirius just looks at him for a moment, before snapping out of it. "Oh, it's nothing." He wants to make a dismissive gesture with his hand, but he has forgotten he's holding a glass of red wine, and ends up throwing it all over his shirt. "Shite!" He curses, wiping his hands over his shirt, only making it worse. "Dammit, dammit! God, I'm such a bloody pillock!"

Remus looks on with a fond smile. Yes, it's going to take a lot of effort to bring out that confident, competent Sirius Black around him, but Remus has the feeling that it's going to be worth it.

[moonyswarmsweaters]

Remus: You are supposed to bang your fist against mine.

Regulus: Why?

Remus: I am told it is a widely accepted gesture for mutual success.

Sirius:

Sirius: I love it when you two impersonate normal people.

[not-rab]

[moonstruckme]

James Potter x Reader where reader is in a different house (Hufflepuff if you don’t mind) and she ends up on the receiving end of one of their pranks which makes her angry so she avoids James and the other marauders, forcing him to grovel/beg for forgiveness? Thank you so much xoxo

Hi, thanks for your request! This got a bit long haha, but I enjoyed writing it and hope you enjoy reading :)

cw: mentions of blood

James Potter x Hufflepuff!reader ♡ 1.8k words

Though no one tells him it’s happening, Remus sees the prank coming from a mile away.

Primarily, this is because James and Sirius appear to be playing an entirely ordinary game of frisbee. Just tossing it back and forth, no hexes or nifflers or anything. A simple pastime between two boys on a lovely warm afternoon. 

Secondly, they haven’t asked Remus to join them. While they know from experience he’s content to read his book in the grass, they always make a point to ask just to be sure Remus doesn’t feel excluded. The fact that they haven’t suggests that they’re well aware that whatever they’re up to, Remus will want no part in it. 

Lastly and most importantly, James Potter has the worst poker face Remus has ever known. 

When the curly-haired boy slyly drops the frisbee they’ve been using into his bag, trading it for another, he can hardly keep the giddiness from his face. Which is probably why, when he tosses it well away from his companion and towards a crowd of gathered students, Sirius is the one who has to say, with theatrical volume and distress, “Merlin, can somebody grab that?”

Remus watches warily as several students turn to track the progress of the disk as it sails overhead, and after a moment one breaks away, chasing after it. Remus feels a pang of sympathy for you, your yellow and black scarf flying behind you as you run, needing no further evidence than the eager look in James’ eyes to know that you’ve fallen for a trap. 

You jump up to grab it out of the air, beaming in triumph for a moment before a yelp escapes you. You fling your catch to the ground, cradling your hand as the fanged frisbee twitches and snarls at your feet. 

“Shit,” he hears Sirius breathe, and the excitement is gone from his and James’ expressions as they jog over to you, Remus standing to follow them. 

You pick your head up as they approach, eyes wet but fierce. 

“What the hell?” you snarl, and Remus realizes with a stab of concern that there’s a small puddle of blood forming in your palm. “You’ve begun targeting your stupid pranks at anyone who’s dumb enough to help you now? How’s that funny?”

Remus looks at his friends in bewilderment, aggrieved on your behalf but unable to believe they’d do something so cruel. The fanged frisbee—a cheap trick, which really should be banned in Remus’ opinion—twitches closer to your ankle, and Sirius flicks his wand at it, its teeth retracting as it goes silent and motionless. 

“We…I charmed it so its teeth would be dull and harmless.” James scrubs a hand through his hair, at a loss. “It was only supposed to scare you, not hurt you.” 

You shake your head at him disbelievingly and bite your lip, face reddening as the pain sets in. James steps closer to you, blocking you from view of the small crowd of gawking students, none of whom, Remus notes with some bitterness, have come to help you or see if you’re okay. 

“I’m really sorry,” James says softly. “Let me help.” But when he reaches for your hand, you step back, holding it close to your chest. 

“Just leave me out of your fun in the future, yeah?” you hiss, stalking inside. 

James looks pained as he watches you go, and though Remus doesn’t begrudge you your justified anger, he feels for his good-natured friend. It had been an honest mistake, though the cost turned out to be far higher than either of his friends had expected. But knowing James, he’ll find some way to make it right. 

“Sorry, mate. They can’t all be winners.” Sirius claps him on the back, and Remus knows his light tone is more to make James feel better than it is true carelessness. Sirius is loyal that way; he’d probably lock you in a broom closet rather than have you upset James again. 

“It wasn’t meant to hurt anyone,” James says quietly.

Sirius’ smile is unfaltering, though Remus spies the worry in his eyes. “She’ll get over it. C’mon, there’s still time to go into Hogsmeade if we hurry.” 

And though Remus hopes you’ll feel better soon, he knows it will take James a long time to get over it himself. 

James shuffles from foot to foot, feeling silly and anxious as he waits for someone to leave the Hufflepuff dorms so he can go inside. He’s fairly sure you’re supposed to have potions together, but you hadn’t shown up to class, and though James had kept an eye out all day in the hallways, he’d never spotted you. He’d thought he’d caught a glimpse of you in the great hall during lunch, but you’d darted out of sight before he could be sure, and then there’d been no sign of you at dinner. Luckily, it had only taken a quick consultation of the map he shared with his friends to find out that you’d holed up in the Hufflepuff common room, so here he was, draped in his invisibility cloak and fidgeting like a nervous date at your front door. 

The door creaks open, and James slips in before it can shut, the exiting Hufflepuff shivering slightly at the breeze he makes whisking by them. It’s not difficult to spot you where you’re sitting painting your nails, lips pursed just slightly in concentration. The common room is mostly empty as other students enjoy the nice weather outside, and James is grateful for the privacy as he takes off the cloak and goes to sit beside your feet where they’re stretched out on the couch. 

You look up at the intrusion and startle to find James, pulling your feet closer to you reflexively. He hopes it’s an instinct to make room for him and not to protect yourself from him, though given recent events he could hardly blame you for the latter. 

“What’re you—how did you get in here?” you ask, eyes darting between James and the door in bafflement. 

Never mind that. “You weren’t at dinner,” James says, holding out his small stolen dish of chicken curry, “so I thought you might be hungry. Sorry, it’s barely warm now.” 

You take it from him suspiciously, careful of your wet nails, and James feels a stab of guilt at the sight of your bandaged hand. 

“I’m really sorry about yesterday,” he goes on, throat burning with shame. “I know I’ve already said it, but it was supposed to be harmless. I wasn’t careful enough.” 

You don’t look at him, not rejecting his apology but not quite accepting it either. “Pomphrey fixed it good as new anyways, so we can just say it never happened.”

James appreciates the attempt to ease his conscience, but your kindness only makes him feel that much more villainous. This would be so simple if you were one of those pureblood gits, or even just a bit ruder, but you’re you, and that’s so much worse. 

“Can I see it?” he asks softly, and you hesitate only a moment before scooting a bit closer and extending your hand to him, palm up. 

James unwraps the bandage with care, keeping one eye on your face to ensure he’s not hurting you, and so he notices the faint blush that colors your cheeks as he cradles your hand in his. The last layer of your dressing falls away, revealing three tiny white scars. Though they’re healed over, he hisses in sympathy, drawing your hand further towards him protectively but forgetting you’re attached to it. 

Your inhale is soft as you lean forward awkwardly, and James huffs a laugh at his enduring idiocy. “Sorry, love,” he says, letting you lean back. He doesn’t let go of your hand, though. “Were they deep?”

You give a one-shouldered shrug, as though it’s nothing to you. James worries you’re putting on a performance of exaggerated blasé for his benefit. “They bled a lot, but a charm sealed them up quickly enough.”

James nods, remembering with sickening clarity the blood that had pooled in your palm and dripped from between your fingers. 

“I’m glad,” James says, and it doesn’t feel like enough. Nothing feels like enough. But he can’t stop himself, even if it’s all inadequate. “I’m really sorry.” 

You sigh, and James knows enough about you to guess that being upset is exhausting you. It isn’t in your nature; you’re someone who always has a kind word for everyone, who he’s seen lend your quill to a student that forgot theirs and offer them an understanding smile when they broke it, who would rather spend all day avoiding James than let him feel the wrath of your grudge. 

Your very warranted grudge, by the way. 

It’s terrible luck that someone as sweet as you was on the receiving end of his mistake. But, as you’d pointed out, that was how the prank was designed, wasn’t it? Though James and Sirius hadn’t thought that part through at the time, the victim was always going to be whoever stepped forward to help. Normally it might not matter, but they’d gotten so caught up in the excitement of trying out their new toy that James had somehow gotten the spell wrong. And as a result, you’d been forced to pay a price for your kindness and his incompetence. 

“It’s okay,” you say.  

“It’s not,” James insists. “And I can’t fix it, but let me do something else. I can do your potions’ homework for the rest of the year, I can give you my dessert every night, I can…I can sneak into Hogsmeade and bring you whatever you want, anytime you ask, I can…what?”

You’re smiling at him, and it’s familiarly lovely but, James can’t help but think, entirely undeserved. 

“I don’t need any favors from you, James,” you say, and he realizes it’s the first time you’ve said his name. It’s not a long name, but somehow your voice gives it a cadence he quite likes. “Just be more careful, okay? I ended up fine, but next time someone might not.” 

“There won’t be a next time,” he promises swiftly, and means it. “But sweetheart—” if he notices how you soften at the endearment, he doesn’t mention it “—you’ve gotta let me make it up to you somehow.”

You sigh again, though it’s lighter this time, seemingly both exasperated and amused by his persistence. After a moment spent within your own head, you ask, “Could you help me study for the potions exam next week?”

“Yes!” James grins eagerly. “Of course. That’s a start. How’s tomorrow after class? I’ll bring study snacks as well, and we can make it a regular thing, if you like.” 

He’d like to make it a regular thing, debt or not. 

You smile. “Tomorrow is perfect. And can I call in another favor right now?”

If James weren’t sitting, he’d buckle at the knees in relief. “Yes. I’m at your service.”

“Can you tell me how you got into the Hufflepuff common room?”

“That,” he says smoothly, “is just one in my arsenal of skills now at your disposal.”

[loonylupin2]

The eyes of the Moon and the Star

[fyloune-taylorsversion]

Wolfstar at the beach 🤗

[a-great-tragedy]

I just know James, Lily, Marlene, and Sirius had a riot when Remus married Tonks like:

“He did not!!”

“That’s like- my niece?? I die, and he marries my niece!”

“Well, he had to marry into the Black family somehow…”

“Come on guys this is clearly a lavender marriage, no way that girl is straight.”

[lexithwrites]

thinking about sirius being remus' first kiss, first relationship and first person he sleeps with makes my heart melt he's such a romantic and he deserves to get lucky and find the love of his life first time

[loserboyfriendrjl]

“what’re you doing?” remus asked, slipping in sirius’ bed and peeking over at him.

sirius was lying on his stomach, his hair put up with his hand and playing with his fingers, reading something that remus couldn’t quite make out upside down.

“reading. the picture of dorian gray,” sirius added, nodding towards the book. “the one you lent me. i also read the annotations.”

the little doodles and words remus had scribbled next to certain paragraphs. underlined words, thoughts, feelings, all put out on the book. remus did not think sirius would read those, too caught up into the actual story to notice.

“do you like it?” remus asked, bringing his knees up to his chest and hugging them.

“definitely interesting,” sirius answered, flipping the book and putting it, face down, on the bed, so that his whole attention was focused on remus, who now felt incredibly small. “you’ve got good taste in books.”

“thank you.” he smiled shyly, and their eyes met. “i could give you other books too, if you want me to, i’ve got quite a handful. some from my dad, too,” he added quickly and suddenly, a piece of information that hadn’t been exactly needed,

but that made sirius chuckle. “i’ll bear that in mind.”

“alright.” he beamed. “i’ll, uh, leave you to it? good night!”

“night,” he grinned, as remus’ slipped out of his bed.

remus let out a quiet, mopey sigh, and crossed to room to his bed.

[solthewizard]

rip remus lupin you would've loved stardew valley

[euripidestrousers]

The Bridget Jones Wolfstar AU that No One Asked For

Dear Diary, 

Even writing those words makes me physically ill so I’d like to start this off by disclosing that getting a diary was not my idea. 

You see, my best friend, James - excellent, wonderful best friend who has recently become a family man by choice, and has therefore become one of the most insufferable people on earth - gave me this diary and said it’s either this or he’s buying me therapy because one more rubbish one-week relationship of mine is going to kill him.

And I don’t need a fucking therapist, so here you are, and here I am. I feel better already.

(haha)

Dear Diary, 

James might be onto something. Today I found myself smoking my third morning cigarette while drinking my coffee and muttering that the drive to work is going to be hell because of the rain. 

I’ve become my father. 

Of course, I asked James if he ever looks in the mirror and sees Monty staring back and if it makes him want to buy a motorbike and he replied, ‘Uh, I’m literally his son, we look alike. Are you okay?’

My thirty third birthday is coming up. 

Please don’t let this be a mid-life crisis. I’m not in a relationship because I don’t want one, and haven’t had one in over ten years because the men in London either want to meet you in the park or meet your parents. It’s the last hour of the buffet and all that’s left is the salad. And I don’t need a relationship either. James and Lily are a match made in heaven since the first time he told her ugly friend he was ugly (rightfully so, the man is still hideous and a complete prick), and she told him to watch his fucking mouth. Made for each other.

But the last time I met a guy that made me laugh and was any sort of attractive and not a complete knob about being attractive, was over three years ago. 

Ie, it’s not for me. End of story.

I bought a motorbike

Dear Diary, 

I’m going to do away with the whole ‘dear diary’ thing, it makes me feel like a schoolgirl and if James ever finds you when we’re drunk he’s going to read out at least one embarrassing entry at me. They’re all embarrassing. 

I went on a blind date today.

“Long black for… Sirish?”

What? Oh. That vague jumble of mush must have been his name. Sirius grabs the takeaway cup and makes for the door briskly. He has the Binkley case to catch up on and write a piece on by the end of the week and he’s still not clear who the man is. A football star perhaps? He’s still being sidelined into the sports area of the paper because he did football for a year. Nevermind that he has an interest in politics and would very much like to report on where the country will be in ten years if it keeps going-

J: You busy after work?

Sirius grins, flopping his jacket over one arm to type back to James Potter, best friend and inarguably lesser half of Lily Potter. 

S: drinks?

J: I have a one year old

S: too early for him to start?

S: kidding. Don’t tell Lily. She’s already started making him take his helmet every time I take him for a day. 

J: It’s not for drinks. Lily has a friend who’s just come to town. I thought maybe you could show him around.

S: Worst lie ever. 

J: I haven’t had coffee yet.

J: It’s actually true though. He just came to town and doesn’t know anyone other than Lily, and Harry has a cold so we’re both staying home.

J: He’s quite attractive I’m told. Lily told me to say ‘tall Martin Freeman’, and that you’d know what it means

S: Potter, if I was so desperate that I would open to a blind date, I definitely wouldn’t start with any of Lily’s friends, they’re all college professors and about 50 years old. 

J: He’s 37

S: He has elbow patches. Guaranteed. Bet he says ‘but the Torries are actually not as conservative as they’re made out to be.’

S: Bet he has a mahogany desk and wanks to Aristotle

J: Jesus christ

J: Photo sent

Sirius glances down uninterestedly and sees a photo of a man. But instead of the expected stuffy looking balding man with a sour face, as most of Lily’s fellow professors are to be fair, instead he’s looking at a tall, brown haired man with flecks of grey at the temples and smiling softly at the camera, and he’s well, he’s not not handsome. Tall Martin Freeman is actually quite right. Hello.

He brings the phone closer to examine the photo as he blindly barges into the office building with the large Get Up, Britain sign gaudy and bright above him. 

The man is younger on second glance, although he is wearing a suit jacket with elbow patches (told you, Jamie), and standing a little awkwardly, like he’s not used to photos being taken of him, and it’s entirely likely that he’s more accustomed to being nose deep in a book ninety percent of the time. 

He’s shagged worse. 

S: I was right about the elbow patches

J: I really tried to find one without them too

J: But he sounds nice. Funny. Lily likes him, she talks about him all the time. They were prefects together in school and used to bunk off and smoke behind the bins

One the one hand: prefect. Disgusting. Hall monitors. Pigs-to-be, snooty, law-abiding to the most irritating degree (Lily being the exception, of course). On the other hand: smoking behind the bins is more his style. Speaking of, he’d love one right now-

J: I really think you’d like him. Even just friends. Moving cities is lonely and he sounds alright. He likes Manchester U?

S: Fine, I’m free after 6

S: Don’t yell at me if I shag him, work has been shit.

So that’s how Sirius finds himself, half past six, swearing up a storm and running with his tote bag over his head in the pouring rain, late for his blind date (or something).

He slams into the restaurant door, shaking himself off like a wet dog, his casual Friday jeans and black t-shirt soaking wet, his shoulder length, black hair is dripping around his face, hoping his laptop has survived, and shivering like a chihuahua at a children’s party. 

“Uh, I’m here for uh-” he consults his phone again and reads the name to the maitre d, “Reh-mus?”

“It’s Remus, actually”, comes a soft voice from his left. 

Sirius turns quickly and immediately drenches the man standing at his elbow in droplets of water from his hair and coat. Tall Martin Freeman indeed - he has one of those faces that’s even better in person, where the way he stoops his shoulders and holds himself makes him look soft and welcoming, and the warm lighting gives him that attractive, cozy professor look, rather than an uptight old man.

“Oh”, Sirius grins quickly, hoping his dazzling smile will make up for their flimsy introduction, “Right, Sirius. Are you still waiting for a table-?”

“I er, well, I was about to leave actually”, Remus says, glancing at the maitre d awkwardly, “You’re quite late.”

Sirius’ smile freezes. Well, then. 

“Got caught up at work”, he replies stiffly, brushing his hair back and letting his eyes go cold, “If you’d prefer we don’t-”

“No, no, of course not”, Remus appears to snap back, as if remembering his manners and seeming oddly distracted, “Please, let’s sit. You look like you could use a drink.”

Sirius runs his tongue along his bottom lip as he follows Remus to the table and wonders if that was a slight about him looking like a drowned rat. He notices the man has worn an absolutely hideous brown jumper that wouldn’t be out of place in an aged care home, so he doesn’t really have the right to judge Sirius’ appearance. 

“Wine?” The waiter offers politely. It’s a nice place - James said Lily had picked it because she thought Remus would like it. It is a little stuffy, honestly. Something his parents might have stopped by and deemed adequate, which is to say, the beer is fucking overpriced, Jesus-

“I’ll have the Stout again, please”, Remus answers briskly, nodding at Sirius to order his.

“Uh, yeah, Stout. Cheers”, Sirius adds, dumping his bag beneath the table and trying to surreptitiously dry his hair in the napkin. Remus looks away as if embarrassed by him. Swot.

“So, you know Lily through school?” Sirius starts, unable to keep the boredom completely out of his voice. 

“Yes. I take it you know James through yours”, Remus answers, very politely but also sounding just as bored. 

“Yeah, grew up together”, Sirius nods. 

Remus doesn’t say anything to that, just hums and sips some water. 

It’s fucking awkward. Normally, Sirius would give him an ultimatum - ‘look, do you want to liven it up a bit and turn this into a fun one-night thing? Because otherwise, I’m not feeling it and I’ve got work to do.’

But Lily knows this guy, they have mutual friends, and if this isn’t what makes blind dates the most excruciating, hellish thing on earth, worse than job interviews, worse than-

“I don’t really do blind dates”, Remus says suddenly, and then blinks as if he hadn’t meant to say anything at all.

“Right”, Sirius says, bewildered. 

“I, er, the dating scene. Not really my thing”, he says quietly, still not looking Sirius in the eye, “But I just moved here from Wales and I don’t know anyone, so this doesn’t have to be… anything. Just-”

“Oh- oh yeah. Fine with me”, Sirius finds himself swallowing down a touch of regret, offended really, because he’s not used to someone not immediately being ready to come home with him. “I’m not really looking for anything and blind dates are, well - eugh, you know? Like, thanks, my friends think I can’t get laid on my own or something so they set me up with whoever they think isn’t a serial killer, like any gay dude will do-”

“Yes, well”, Remus says tightly, taking another sip, “I rather thought Lily knew me better than that.”

His tone is rather pointed and Sirius realises he’s let his mouth run. Well… to be fair, the guy is kind of a snob. What was Lily thinking anyway?

“Yeah”, he agrees through his teeth, crossing his arms and legs and sitting back in his chair to wait for his beer. Maybe he can make an excuse after one drink. He can’t be friends with someone who doesn’t have a sense of humour and if this bloke doesn’t want to be a one-night stand, then he’d much rather be home. Alone.

“Is there anything around here you’d recommend?” Remus tries, voice clipped and still sounding slightly offended, “Restaurants? More importantly, ones you don’t recommend?”

“There’s a place that does turkey curry. It’s awful.”

“What? What curry?” The tightness in Remus’ face slips momentarily and he looks genuinely bewildered. He’s actually not a bad looker when he’s not frowning. 

“Turkey. It’s as bad as it sounds. Actually it’s worse, like eating a lamb burrito, it’s just not right. Shittest fucking curry and it’s as bad going in as it is bad going ou-”

“Two Stouts.”

The waiter delivers their beers and they fade off into silence as they drink. 

Remus sips delicately, in a way that’s completely inappropriate for a beer, and says awkwardly, “Yes well, thank you for the tip. I’ll rest easy never knowing what turkey curry tastes like.”

“Yeah, I mean, if you can avoid it then I guess this date wasn’t a waste after all.”

Remus blinks, expression dropping. 

Oh. Oh fuck. Double fuck. He hadn’t meant to say that.

“I’ve got to go to the bathroom”, Remus says abruptly and stands. He stalks away quickly and leaves Sirius gnawing at his lip and furious at both himself and this infuriating man who seems to loathe him, minutes after meeting him and who Lily apparently thinks is nice. 

He’s got other shit to be getting on with, he decides. And this bloke probably shags like a limp fish anyway, an Oxford type that thinks poetry is foreplay and once a month sex is scandalously frequent.

He drains his beer and half of Remus’ for good measure, and heads to the bathroom so he can catch Remus on his way out, only to hear his own name hissed furiously. He sees Remus standing out the front of the restaurant, shoulders raised against the cold and holding the phone to his ear. He steps closer and half opens the door to tell him he’s going to head off when he hears the conversation.

“... how did you think someone like Sirius would be good for me? After the hell I’ve had in the last year? Going on a date with someone like him? He showed up thirty minutes late, dressed like he’s going to a bar playing exclusively Metallica, and insulted me immediately. I told you, I don’t mind being alone for a while, especially after the divorce. I certainly don’t want to be shown around London by a rude, arrogant berk who dresses like a teenager and doesn’t seem to have a filter between his brain and his mouth. He probably thinks the bar scene is-oh”

Remus catches sight of him out of the corner of his eye and he spins. They stare at each other for a few excruciation moments, Remus still holding the phone to his ear. 

Sirius breaks the tension with a forced laugh, “Right. I’m definitely going home.”

“Wait, shit, I’ll call you back”, Remus mutters into the phone and hangs up, stepping forward but Sirius pushes past him, temper steadily rising into a roaring bonfire within his chest.

“Sirius, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean-”

“You’re absolutely right, I wouldn’t know the first thing about showing a bloke like you around London”, he turns and says loudly so it carries over the sounds of the cars driving by on the busy street, “You’d be more comfortable in a fucking graveyard, honestly. There’s one ten minutes that way-” he turns his back and points over to the left, calling back over his shoulder, “You’ll find someone much more your speed there, Remus.”

Blind date disastrous as expected. 

Remus fucking Lupin, a professor extraordinaire who wouldn’t be able to find his funny bone if it conked him on the fucking head, is not an exception to the blind date rule, even though he’s easy on the eyes at first glance. At second glance, he is a miserable, dried up academic whose own self-importance has completely consumed him despite dressing like his grandfather for Halloween. 

If this is what my friends think of me, I need to sort my fucking shit out. 

I should have asked him to shag before he opened his stupid fucking mouth. 

[jamesunderwater]

in other news i'm in love with wylan van eck

[enbysiriusblack]

thinking about sirius being the one who hangs out with evan as a kid (their parents being friends and forcing them to have playdates) but sirius and evan don't get along and their playdates consist of them arguing and chucking toys at each other

[loonylupin2]

Remus didn’t know how to kiss and Sirius taught him how to

[getfuckedblr]

latest bind!! Scent of the Moon by QuietLemonHush: wolfstar and jegulily, wolf packs and instincts, soooo much black family drama. absolutely LOVE!

this bind was pretty fun! i didn’t go too hard on the chapter headings, but i was really excited about the lewk of it. the peel and stick velvet is honestly the best part bc it takes like 2 seconds to wrap my case and it is so fucking satisfying. and this specific brand of htv (gatichetta) peels like a dream AND looks so beautiful. so yeah i’m pretty happy with this bind!!

[silence-between-seconds]

ykw ive never really seen sirius written as awkward in fics so imma do the honours