#children&adoption

[dcxdpdabbles]

Bruce: How many children do I have?

Alfred: Have you honestly lost count?

Bruce: I know I should have about seven, give or take.

Alfred: Give or take?!

Bruce: But I just counted, and I swear there is an extra teenager in the left wing. *shows cameras on tablet* See? Who is that, and why do they have a fully stock bedroom?

Alfred: Sir that's Master Tim

Bruce: No, Tim's bedroom is on the first floor of the left wing.

Alfred: Ah, my eyes aren't as they used to be. I mistook Master Jason for Master Tim-

Bruce: Jason changed his room to the right wing, by the libary.

Alfred: Master Damian-

Bruce: Is shorter than this person and also in the right wing.

Alfred: Master Dick perhaps-

Bruce: He doesn't even live here anymore. Also who ever this is not a female so its not Cass or Steph and he is definitely too scrawny to be Duke.

Alfred: .......Who the bloody hell is this?

Bruce: I don't know! He called me Dad and asked me to sign his school trip permission slip, so I did, but I have no idea who this kid is!

Alfred: Good lord, I think I made his bed this morning. I didn't even realize it wasn't one of the children's rooms!.....he would make an excellent spy for the crown :D

[appleswan]

Jason knows that when he approaches kids in his entire get up that they're scared of him, and in crises that's... not great. So he's taken to carrying sticker books with him. He has enough pockets for it. He offers the kids stickers, and he lets them put the stickers on his helmet. He has dozens of Red Hood helmets now, all of them have an amalgamation of new and faded stickers.

The rest of the family tries to make fun of him for it, but Jason just holds out his sticker books like "You seem stressed, have a sticker."

[chaoticallyfluffy]

Shazam identity reveal AU where the league knew Captain Marvel was a child named Billy since day one but he stubbornly refuses to transform or tell his full name for the whole 4 years he’s been on the team and everyone’s so confused because they know like. 95% of his identity already why is he hiding this specific part?

They start thinking he’s some kind of criminal or had a dark past he’s hiding from them. They know so much about him, though. They know he’s homeless, they know he’s had bad foster homes, they know his parents died tragically and his uncle stole his inheritance. he shares everything. Everything except the one thing that would show he truly trusts them. Why? What have they done to convince him they weren’t trustworthy?

Then. He accidentally transforms back during a battle. Batman instantly scans his face with the facial scanner that’s built into his mask because he’s paranoid as hell of course he has one of those. And he sees exactly why he hid it for so long.

The tension in the air is so palpable that the entire league feels it and they look back and forth between them waiting for the bomb to drop.

Cyborg is the one who blurts it out (he IS a facial scanner)

“Your last name is BAT SON??”

Billy groans into his hands in defeat and Batman sighs, finally understanding why the secret was kept so desperately.

From then on the league refuses to call Billy anything other than Big Red Robin or just Big Robin. Robin but big. they call Batman Captain Dad at every possible opportunity. Whenever Billy does something wrong someone threatens to tell his dad on him then call Batman. The robins last names may as well not exist because from then on they are only ever called Damian Bat-son or Red Hood Bat-son or Stephanie Bat-daughter, except for Red Robin who’s called Little Red Robin or, if they’re feeling brave, the Little Red Cheese. The bat children and Billy’s nicknames become so confusing and meshed together that conversations get very confusing and the names just become interchangeable. The press is convinced that Captain Marvel is Batman’s secret love child within a week.

It gets so chaotic so fast, no one knows how this happened but names mean nothing anymore and Batman is getting a DNA test. So much opportunity for chaos!

[iamtoothandclaw]

Cerberus, 2022

I cannot believe I never posted this, as it's one of my favorite art pieces I've done in years. A painting of my darling nephew, Buckley.

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 113

“I seem to have been taken hostage.” Batman’s words almost had Superman panic if not for the wry tone, a tone which the others didn’t know if their freaking out was to go by. Clark sighed through the comms, tired after battle and honestly wanting to go to bed now.

“I’ll be right over, what child has latched onto you now?” He asked while switching to a more private channel. 

“I can already hear you making fun of me…” Wha- Oh. Clark bit his lip to keep himself from laughing as he took to the air. “They appear to be a pair of twins with…” 

“You gotta’ say it Bruce, you gotta’,” Clark couldn’t stop the chuckle when he saw his friend on the top of a building, cape curled around his form in a way usually reserved for the robins. 

“... with dark hair… and blue eyes…” That was it. Clark absolutely lost it in laughter. 

[bet-on-me-13]

The Bat-Adoption Papers are literal Magic Contracts

So! In the Deified Batman AU (the AU where the Belief of the peoples of Gotham accidentally Ascended Batman to minor godhood), the Bat Adoption Papers would be a fun concept.

Batman is a God of The Night, Fear, and Protection. Specifically, the protection of Children, which is one of his biggest motivators. Meaning, it's a big part of his Divine Domain.

So when he, a God of Protection and Children, adopts his own Child? It's kind of a big deal.

His Adoption Papers basically become Magical Contracts that claim Dick to him as his own Son, basically turning Dick into a Demigod by the fact that he is the Son of a God.

Then each time Batman adopts a kid, they become a Demigod as well. Maybe after enough time, and after they forge their own Identities, they could become Minor Gods of their own? Idk, fun idea

Why do I bring this up?

Well, when Danny eventually joins the JLA, and runs into Batman, all he sees in a God of the Night, who takes one look at him, and then pulls out a Magical Binding Contract from his Belt.

Needless to say, he books it.

[frogs-in3-hills]

hi does anyone else think about april throwing herself over leo to shield him in the shredder strikes back despite having no weapons no way to defend herself and probably assuming she was going to die. does anyone think about that all the time. every day. uncontrollably

[ID: Digital fanart of Ninja Turtles 2003 depicting a scene from The Shredder Strikes Back part 2. April kneels over an injured Leo, cradling his head and looking back over her shoulder to snarl viciously at the camera, though there is obvious fear in her eyes. Her hair has partially fallen out of her bun, the loose strands sticking to her face with sweat. She has a cut on her cheek. Only a portion of Leo’s face can be seen from behind her shoulder. He looks up at her with a sad, pained expression. He has a swollen, bloody shiner on his cheek in addition to other cuts and bruises on the rest of his body. They are on the wooden floor of a dark attic. End ID.]

[squids-and-waffles7]

the noceda family!! 

[ ID: A digital illustration of Camila, Luz, Hunter, and Vee from The Owl House. Camila is to the top left with her hand on Hunter’s shoulder, smiling. Hunter is directly below her with a surprised expression on his face and wearing a wolf shirt. To the bottom right, Luz is grinning with one arm wrapped around Hunter and one hand holding up a peace sign. Directly above her is Vee, who is smiling with her chin resting in her hands. End ID ]

[cloakedsparrow]

Clark calls the Batcave.

Jason: Hello?

Clark: Robin? It's Superman.

Jason: Yeah, you were ID'd before I even answered. What's up?

Clark: Uh, I stopped at a store after flying back into town and bumped into someone from work. We walked out together, so I had to pretend my car was stolen, but it's still at my apartment building. I wanted to know if Batman had any ideas for a cover.

Jason: Oh, no worries. I got you.

Clark: What do you mean?

Jason: I'll take care of it.

Clark: Oh...kay. Thank you, Robin.

Jason: No sweat!

Later, Clark discovers his car truly is missing. It's found with the tires, stereo, and catalytic converter removed, the wiring stripped, and the hood ornament knocked off. The police tell him that, sadly, this sort of thing has been happening more and more, even in their fine city.

Clark calls again.

Jason: Hey! Did everything work out with your car story?

Clark: Yes, thank you, Jason.

Jason: Great! Swing by later and I'll give you your cut.

Clark: You mean the missing parts of my car?

Jason: What? No. That shit's serial numbered. The cops would think you were pulling an insurance scam or somethin' if you put it back and anyone noticed. I sold the parts to a chop shop here.

Clark: You sold-?

Jason: Don't worry, my guy ain't a snitch. Your secret's safe!

Clark: ...Thanks.

Jason: No problem. I had to tell him you needed the car disappeared 'cause you were cheating on your old lady so he wouldn't think it was tied to something too bad, though.

Clark: I'll keep that in mind.

Jason: Oh, hey, B's here. You wanna talk to him?

Clark: Yes, please.

Jason: Cool. Talk to you later!

Clark: Bye, Jason.

Bruce: Clark.

Clark: I take it you know what happened?

Bruce: Yes. You learned a valuable lesson, didn't you?

Clark: Next time, I will definitely ask how he intends to take care of it.

Bruce: Good. I don't want my son arrested because he was doing you a favor.

Clark: I had no idea he was going to strip my car and sell the parts to a chop shop!

Bruce: You know how I found him. You knew the risks.

Clark: ...

Bruce: And you're letting him keep your cut.

Clark: Of course.

[canisalbus]

Hypothetically if. If they had a kiddo. A puppy. Does that hypothetical child have a design in your genius artist head anywhere

.

[pocketpen]

Finally started this show and I love it

[beebox-illustrations]

Have you thought about Emma Winchester recently? You know, Deans amazon warrior daughter from season 7? No? Sorry then. Still immeasurably infuriating me.

Anyway, Happy Father’s Day 🥲 from her and the dozens of kids Dean adopted along the way

Have a nice week 🐝🌻

[deklo]

my interpretation of adoptive bee :’)

pls don’t repost!

[odysseus-crewmate-number38]

its gotta suck being a kid at camp half-blood post toa if you aren’t cabin 7

like imagine having to accept the fact your godly parent probably doesn’t really care about your existence beyond being a tool for quests meanwhile Apollo’s crashing into camp for the 12th time today at 7:00 am in the morning to hang out with his kids + nico and meg

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 257

Now Danny loves space. He loves everything about it, to the point his core quite literally is space. And he’s also a baby ghost, even if he could argue he’s not in human form. But see, being baby has an honestly great consequence once it’s noticed- despite the Observants’ best attempts at hiding it, the assholes. 

Of course he would be far more worried- and even a bit pissed- if his caretaker wasn’t who it was. Look, he’d never met Clockwork’s siblings before, but apparently everyone was really against Clockwork himself adopting. 

But Clockwork as his uncle is fine. Besides, his caretaker is Space! Space itself is holding him, cooing gentle words in the sounds of the very cosmos. And they’re huge, like parts of their body going through portals so they can fit outside Long-Now sized big- and apparently Clockwork can get just as big and they can get even bigger- 

Okay, he needs to take a breath- even if he doesn’t need to breathe- to stop his squealing because holy Realms this is so cool. 

Space is awesome! And he’s getting so much more rest than he did in Amity- and even if Space sort of shrugged at the idea of school at first, they did help him set up online schooling. So there’s that, and it’s just the start! 

He gets to learn so much about space and it’s honestly kind of… nice? To be taken care of? And he can do whatever he needs for his Core and Obsession with only a few interruptions to take care of his living needs. Erm, sort of living needs? 

But even that gets turned into a bit of play or even a lesson too! He’s honestly having such a good time right now! He’s learning so much about spaaace! And dimensions! And interdimensional portals and- oops! No one saw that. 

Ahem- But he’s learning so much about space and getting to explore other dimensions with Cosmos! And sure he no longer looks as human as he once did and all that, but he’s seen so many people who also don’t look human that does it really matter? 

Of course it doesn’t, and he matches his sort-of-dad! Even though the streaks of color in their hair are more of a brown-red like they’re literally bleeding out the cosmos around them instead of it fading to void and space like his own. But still! They match and it’s fun! 

And they’re going to go on another trip from the in-between to one of the dimension realities! He’s going to start a game of tag this time he thinks! But no cheating with portals or bending space! Tag! 

Look, the Justice League? Not paid enough for this. In fact, technically not paid at all due to being volunteers (not that it stopped them from finding money in their accounts) but still. 

There is some sort of figure… being… thing… zooming around the asteroid belt, about the size of Earth itself. Let them repeat themselves. A planet-sized creature (are those hands or paws? Tail or simply its body stretching? Hair or the Abyss-) is currently darting around the asteroid belt like a child running through grass. 

That is, without noticing or caring if something bug-sized might be crushed. And they are very much bug sized, as the governments are concerned about. Like really concerned about. Like talking about trying to nuke the entity if it wanders closer sort of concerned. 

Which they are all very concerned and very much like, against. Because it isn’t seeming to notice the asteroids it’s knocking into their area. It’s like… not a space whale or eel or anything like that but also is something like that. 

And they would also maybe like to see if they can attempt to talk it down first maybe and-

oh. 

Oh. 

That creature is the baby. And mama just arrived, stretching across the entire galaxy, from them to Pluto and beyond, like something took the cosmos and shaped it like clay into some sort of form. Like reality itself has wandered into their galaxy with what they are suddenly realizing must be a very young child. 

Shit, they really have to make sure no one tries to piss either of these things off-

[coatl-cuddles]

A little birdie told me we enjoy moths in this house