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muletia · 8 months ago

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𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 ⋆. 𐙚 ˚

[tfp] obsessed!orion pax x human!reader

summary: what if optimus' obsession bypassed his memory loss? what if he was so infatuated that even his past self yearned for you?

cw: fluff, pinch of angst, canon divergence: orion is taken by the autobots, obsessive thoughts, clinginess, orion literally cannot be left alone for one(1) second, tbh nothing happens in this, i just wanted to write obsessed!orion interacting with you, bad writing, silliness

word count: 4700

"Come to the base. It's urgent."

As you stare at the terse message from Ratchet, your chewing slows and stops. A storm of questions whirls in your mind, panic creeping into your body. Before you can even type a single letter, your phone rings. The caller is none other than the Autobot medic himself. You answer in less than a second.

"Hello? Ratchet, please don't scare me—what exactly happened?"

"It's about Optimus." Your heart skips a beat. "During the last mission, he was... injured. Or, to be precise, damaged."

"Is it serious?" you ask, pacing nervously around the break room. Lunch now long forgotten. "Will he be all right?"

"Physically—he's never looked or felt better. Mentally, however... that's a different story. I'll explain the details when you get here. And make it quick."

"Hold on, wait—I can't just leave work early like that. There's a whole procedure for this. I can't just waltz out, even though I’d love to leave right now."

"...In an hour and a half, I expect to see you here at the base. See you then."

He hangs up. You stare at your phone screen for a moment, replaying the conversation in your head. Something serious must have happened—Ratchet wouldn’t disturb you at work otherwise. And it involved Optimus... You bite your lip, torn by indecision. You need to at least make sure he's okay, to see with your own eyes what Ratchet was talking about. Otherwise, you'll regret your negligence and spend the rest of the day worrying.

Shoving the half-eaten sandwich into your bag, you rush to your computer to draft a request for early leave, praying fervently that your boss will grant it.

You kept pressing the gas, speeding toward the base, trying to balance obeying traffic laws with worrying about the Autobot. You knew he had been preparing for a mission recently, he had told you about it during a ride you shared, but you didn’t expect it to end like this. Maybe you should have, considering you were associated with a race of aliens deeply embroiled in a centuries-long war, but you always pushed such unpleasant thoughts to the back of your mind, wishing your friends the best. Now, though, all the worst scenarios were coming to the surface. Had he fallen into a coma? Was his processor damaged? Had he died? You didn’t want to think about such an ending. Optimus was alive. You were sure of that.

Seeing the familiar red rock, a tight knot of anxiety gripped your throat. In a few moments, you were about to drive into what was practically your second home, not knowing what awaited you. You glanced at the clock. You were half an hour late—well beyond the time Ratchet had given you.

As if on cue, the medic called you again.

“Don’t enter the hangar. Leave the vehicle at the entrance.”

Before you could say a word, he hung up, leaving you to sigh in frustration.

Following his instructions, you parked at the main entrance and made the rest of the journey on foot. The lights seemed especially harsh, glaring into your eyes as the tunnel stretched endlessly ahead of you, as if warning you, giving you one last chance to turn back. But no force on Earth could stop you now. Determined, you marched forward, needing to know what had happened to your friend.

The hangar was full of Autobots, their sheer presence intimidating. You had thought you were over the feeling of smallness that came with being one of the humans among them, but now it hit you again, hard, dredging up memories of when humans in their midst were still a novelty. You froze for a moment, your courage momentarily disappearing in the shadows of giants.

It wasn’t until your eyes landed on the reason you had left work early that you began to breathe again. Optimus stood there, seemingly whole and healthy, facing the platform where the kids likely were. Relief washed over you. He was alive. Your heart was still racing, but the weight of dread lifted slightly, leaving you braced for the next wave of bad news.

"Hey, sorry I’m late. Work took longer than I expected," you called out.

Your voice immediately caught his attention. Optimus turned to you so abruptly that it shocked everyone present, abandoning the conversation he had been engaged in. Tilting your head back to meet his gaze, you were surprised when he knelt down on one knee, making himself more accessible. You still had to look up, but now his face wasn’t obscured by his… windshields.

The first hint that something was off was his smile—wide, cheerful, and curious. Optimus didn’t smile like that, not even when something genuinely delighted him. Worry started gnawing at you again. Something was wrong.

"Greetings. You must be our next human ally, correct?"

At first, you were at a loss for words. Of all the scenarios you had imagined, memory loss hadn’t even crossed your mind. But before the conversation could veer into awkward territory or panic could take hold, you managed to reply, mirroring his smile.

"That’s right."

"You seem… familiar. As though we have met before."

The hangar fell silent, the atmosphere thickening.

"Of course he would remember her," Ratchet hissed under his breath. You shot him a glare filled with venom.

Focusing back on the mech before you, you forced a calm smile, masking the whirlwind of emotions inside you. You felt like you were on the verge of exploding—uncertain whether to jog his memories or pretend this was truly your first meeting. Why hadn’t anyone given you guidance on how to handle this?

"Erm, well…" you began, only for Ratchet to step in and spare you.

"Humans can look quite similar at first glance," the medic interjected. "Orion, this is [Name], the last human who should know of our existence."

A flicker of something lit up in his cyan optics—something indefinable, known only to him.

"Greetings, [Name]. It is a great pleasure to meet you."

He extended a servo toward you. Tentatively, you clasped one of his digits, ignoring the ache in your heart. This shouldn’t have been happening. You shouldn’t have to forge a new relationship with someone so dear to you. It felt uncanny—like he was wearing Optimus’s skin but was someone entirely different inside. It was unnerving, disorienting. Yet this stranger had knelt before you, reduced himself to your scale to show respect, just as Optimus always had. It was a glimpse of his alternate self, a sign of the inherent honor and kindness he still carried.

"Hello, Orion. The pleasure is all mine."

Letting go of his servo, you gave him an apologetic smile, signaling the end of the conversation. You needed answers, clarity about the situation, before you could decide how to proceed. As Orion straightened up, you stepped past him toward the platform. You could feel curious optics on you, particularly his, as you fist-bumped the kids. Unbeknownst to you, Orion clenched his servo in the same way you had during your handshake.

"So," you said to Ratchet, "what happened?"

The medic sighed, clearly weary of recounting the story yet again. But you had to know. You listened intently, the details unsettling and at times horrifying, but you felt a growing sense of calm. At least now you knew what you were dealing with—what topics to avoid, how to act. The relief faded, however, when you learned that the first attempt to restore Optimus’s memories had failed, and no date had been set for the next.

As Ratchet spoke, most of the team dispersed, leaving only you, the medic, and Orion in the hangar. Taking a moment to process everything, you glanced at Orion, catching his curious gaze.

This was your new reality. Optimus was gone, yet not entirely, standing just a few meters away, watching you intently. It was too much to dwell on. You needed something to distract yourself.

Standing from the couch, you headed down the stairs. You figured you’d be here for the rest of the evening, so you might as well find something productive to do.

"[Name]?" Orion’s voice stopped you in your tracks. He looked genuinely concerned. "Are you leaving already?"

His behavior puzzled you.

"I’m just going to grab my things. I’ll be right back."

"I see. May I accompany you?"

Oh, that was adorable—especially with the hopeful tone in his voice.

"I’m not sure you’ll fit in the tunnel in your current form," you teased with a laugh. "It won’t take long. I’ll be back in a minute."

This time, you quickened your pace.

For several hours, Orion's life had been filled with uncertainty. He didn’t know how he had ended up on this planet, who the Autobots around him were, or why they called him "Prime" when he felt he was unworthy of the title. And now, another enigma had appeared—you. Orion could not rationalize the overwhelming need to be near you. He had felt it the moment he laid his optics on you. The need to stay close, to converse, to observe. The need to know you better. Never before had such intense emotions stirred within him for anyone, let alone a stranger. But you weren’t a stranger. This may have been your first meeting, and he may have spoken to you for the first time, but you were not unfamiliar. Of that, he was absolutely certain.

Seconds stretched into minutes, and minutes into hours since you had disappeared into the tunnel. He regretted not following you, even if it meant transforming into his alt-form. At least he would have kept an optic on you, preventing the gnawing feelings of confusion and longing from devouring him from inside.

Ratchet watched his friend closely. He recognized that look, that body language. He knew what it signified, what storm was brewing in Orion’s processor. Optimus had been the same when it came to you. For a brief moment, his friend was back. Too bad it was under such circumstances.

"Do you really remember that woman?" he asked.

"I am not certain," Orion replied, still gazing toward the tunnel. "I feel like she is not a stranger, even though I know this was our first encounter. And as… Prime, if I indeed held that title, was she close to me?"

Primus.

"Perhaps closer than any human, but only Optimus knew to what extent. That might explain why you recognized her."

"Then she is special."

"Everything points to that."

Orion glanced at him, offering a faint smile. For reasons Ratchet couldn’t quite explain, the gesture was hard to look at. Fortunately, you emerged from the tunnel, giving him an excuse to start working again.

"See? I told you it’d only take a minute," you laughed, a black backpack slung over your shoulder.

Orion didn’t confess the truth—that by his reckoning, you had been gone an eternity. He watched intently as you climbed the stairs and took a seat on the couch.

"So, Orion," you began, "what did you do on Cybertron?"

Oh. You were curious about him? Truly? He had never thought of himself as particularly interesting.

It was fortunate that you were not looking at him because his body language betrayed his embarrassment.

"I was an archivist. Do humans on Earth have similar professions?"

"Of course. You know, I’ve always admired archivists. It’s meticulous work, requiring patience and nerves of steel—if you know what I mean. Anyway, it’s an important job, and anyone who takes it up is very cool in my book."

"Cool?"

"You know, fascinating, impressive, admirable."

"Does that mean that... in your optics, I am… cool?"

He asked without thinking and immediately regretted it when you gave him an amused look. Embarrassed, he tilted his helm downward. For such a towering and formidable being, he was also astonishingly skittish. It was peculiar to see a former Prime in such a light, but it made him more relatable, more emotionally accessible. Even so, you couldn’t deny that you missed Optimus.

"Of course, you’re cool to me."

That answer brightened him. A spectacle of stars dances in his optics.

You returned to typing on your laptop, but Orion had other plans for you.

"It seems I still have much to learn about this planet."

"I think you’ll catch on quickly. Besides, if it makes you feel any better, the other bots don’t know everything either. If you’re ever unsure, just ask. I’ll do my best to help."

"Thank you, [Name]. Your kindness is very important to me."

"Anytime. If you’d like, you could also explore our literature—it’ll give you a good insight into what humanity is all about. That sounds like a fitting activity for an archivist, doesn’t it?"

He would much rather have you as his sole source of knowledge about your species, as it meant spending more time with you. He wanted to know not just what you were but who you were—your interests, where you worked, how you spent your free time, your philosophy, beliefs, and hobbies. Everything you were willing to share. He wanted to know you inside and out, to solidify this sense of connection and make it real. And if you wished, he would bare his own secrets, reveal his spark, and show you every part of himself. Perhaps then you might look at him just for a second longer.

"Yes, I believe that would be an enjoyable activity. And what is it that you do?"

He asked question after question, each answer adding a new layer of understanding about you. He shared a little in return, preferring listening to you—your opinions, your perspective.

Time passed swiftly in your company. Relentless and unforgiving, it waited for no one. Orion realized this when you set aside your device and began stretching. It was a mesmerizing sight—your movements were so different from those of Cybertronians, fluid, and light. That was until the air was pierced by the loud crack coming from your back.

Energon froze in his fuel lines, and his spark leaped to his intake.

"[Name]? Are you alright? Are you harmed?"

"Hm?" you hummed, confused. He looked as though calamity had befallen him, as though you’d been beheaded. Then you remembered—it was Orion, not Optimus, and the human body was weird. "Oh, that. Don’t worry, I’m fine. It’s perfectly normal." To prove your point, you began cracking your knuckles, stopping quickly when you saw his horrified expression. "Okay, sorry about that. But really, I’m fine. I just need to stretch."

"Alright…" he replied, though he didn’t seem convinced. You couldn’t blame him.

You rose from the couch and stepped down from the platform, intending to take a short walk. Panic erupted in his spark. Oh no. No, no, no. He didn’t want to be left alone, not after such a jarring experience. He wouldn’t let you out of his optics now—not even for a moment.

"May I accompany you?"

"Of course!" you replied without hesitation, smiling—a gesture he immediately mirrored. "It won’t be very exciting, though."

"On the contrary, I find you to be a most intriguing individual."

"Oh, thank you," you said, clearing your throat, embarrassed. Compliments delivered in that baritone still flustered you.

Together, you ventured deeper into the base, bypassing various sections. In the training room, Arcee worked on her speed, while Bulkhead struck a makeshift punching bag fashioned from an old car. The children watched the spectacle, occasionally entertaining themselves. You both quickly slipped past the always-open entryway and continued on your way.

“[Name]?” Orion inquires. You turn into an empty hangar with a high platform, starting to ascend the stairs.

“Hm?”

“How do humans attempt to court their partners?”

You hadn't expected that kind of question. You stop mid-step, pondering your answer. When you look at him, his expression is dead serious, though his optics betray a determination. Why would he want to know this? You decide it’s probably mere curiosity.

“It depends on the person.” You continue climbing the stairs until you finally reach the top, now level with his faceplate. “Some buy gifts like flowers, others go on elaborate dates. But the common factor is spending time together, and getting to know one another. Feelings tend to develop naturally that way,” you explain. “Actually, that’s an interesting topic. How did it work on Cybertron?”

“Similarly. However, instead of exchanging ‘flowers,’ we presented rare metals or crystals to leave the best impression. To demonstrate strength and potential as a partner.”

“I know a few people who would totally fall for that approach. Heh, I’d be thrilled to get a geode myself.”

Orion suddenly lights up. Were you suggesting something or just sharing an opinion? Whatever it was, he felt compelled to try. To prove himself worthy. Perhaps he could even find the ‘flowers’ you mentioned.

“I see. Thank you for enlightening me.”

“You’re welcome?” you reply, unsure exactly how you’ve helped, but the sight of his broad smile and bright optics makes it all worthwhile. He was utterly adorable.

The two of you chat casually until you’re forced to check the time. You inhale sharply, and Orion tilts his head slightly, curious about your reaction.

“It was great talking to you, but I really need to go. I have work tomorrow and I’d like to get some sleep.”

Panic flashes across his face. He had enjoyed your company so much. He didn’t feel alienated or alone when he was with you. The sense of connection played a significant role, but Orion had already let you into his spark. He had found a safe harbor in you and wasn’t ready to drift away just yet. He wasn’t ready to let go, even if the world around him were to crumble.

“May I accompany you?” he asks, desperation seeping into his tone.

“Excuse me?”

“May I accompany you?” he repeats, now begging.

“My home isn’t exactly designed to host a giant robot. Besides, it’s dangerous and... wait, do you even know the traffic regulations?”

His expression answers the question, but he still attempts to defend himself.

“I have acquainted myself with them partially.”

“Who has the right of way at an uncontrolled intersection?”

He opens his mouth but quickly closes it again, visibly crestfallen. He looks as though he might cry.

“Orion, we’ll see each other tomorrow,” you reassure him. “The first thing I’ll do after work is come here.”

He frantically searches for an argument to keep you with him—anything to prolong your company. Then he remembers his first encounter with human children.

“Every child was assigned a guardian who escorted them home and ensured their safety,” he states, refusing to give up. “Do you have a protector?”

“Unofficially, that was Optimus…”

“Then I would like to carry on his mission.”

“I’m not a child, Orion.”

“I understand that. I merely wish for your safety, [Name],” he explains earnestly. ��And… I would prefer not to part from the company most dear to me.”

Your thoughts drift back to something he said earlier—how he recognized the bond you once shared, even though this was your first conversation. He hadn’t recognized Ratchet or anyone from his team—only you.

You tried to put yourself in his position. To suddenly find yourself in a foreign place, surrounded by strangers addressing you by a false name and feeding you information that might as well be fiction. And then, in a world where nothing is familiar, someone steps in—someone you vaguely recognize. You might not know their name, but you know there was once a connection. Wouldn’t you cling to that tiny thread, desperately pulling it closer if someone tried to take it away?

Orion had found solid ground, and you were unintentionally trying to undermine it. You exhale softly. You already knew you’d be saying goodbye to sleep tonight.

“Alright.” His smile makes it all worth it. It’s as though you’ve handed him a star from the sky. “Let’s see what Ratchet has to say about all this.”

"I see no objections."

Orion looks at you with excitement sparkling in his optics.

"Wow, that was quick."

"It's a good excuse for Orion to explore the area and get accustomed to his alt mode."

The medic refrains from adding that if the former leader remained at the base, he would likely have wasted away in longing for you, lamenting to every sentient being that he couldn't wait to see you again. Though the comment teeters on the edge of his glossa, he opts for discretion. Optimus, at least, had never vocalized his peculiar obsession with you quite so openly.

"Should anything unusual occur, contact me immediately. Someone will come for you in the morning," Ratchet advises his friend before turning to you. "Good night, [Name]."

You thank the medic for his diligence and ask him to take some rest, earning a piercing glare that almost feels lethal, then retrieve your backpack and head toward the tunnel. Orion stays close by, not leaving your side even after transforming. Ever the gentleman, he opens the door for you, visibly delighted at the prospect of your first shared drive together. In his mind, this was more than a mere drive—it was a deeply intimate act, almost akin to inviting a partner into one’s private space.

But his dreams are promptly shattered when you inform him that you have your own car.

The journey is uneventful but nerve-wracking; you constantly check your side mirror to ensure Orion is still following you. Thankfully, there are no issues, and he even remembers to use his turn signals when necessary. Everything proceeds smoothly until you pull into your driveway and are struck by a dreadful realization: Will a Peterbilt even fit in my garage?

You park your car to the side, leaving Orion enough space to drive safely. Exiting your vehicle, you open the garage door and wave at him to proceed. You nervously bite your thumb, watching the massive truck carefully edge into the space. There are barely three centimeters between the roof of the truck and the ceiling. When you close the garage door, the already limited space shrinks further.

"So, do you regret your decision now?" you ask, stepping around to the front of the truck.

Orion transforms with meticulous precision, carefully positioning his limbs and helm to avoid damaging the walls. The process goes well until his helm grazes the ceiling with an audible thud, dislodging a few small pieces of debris. He winces slightly and rubs his helm but offers you a warm smile.

"I do not regret my decision."

"Pfff, well, that's good. Are you all right?"

"I am unharmed."

You can’t help but feel guilty for confining him to such a cramped space, but it was his choice. If he insisted, he would simply have to endure it. Of course, that meant you would have to endure it, too, as the issues began almost immediately.

"All right, I’m going to grab my things. I’ll be back in a moment."

He panics again—something you’re beginning to expect from him.

"Please, do not leave me."

His voice is unchanging. A deep and thick baritone that permeates your body, speaking straight to your soul. It is strange to hear the same voice coming out of a shamed and uncertain being, begging you for company.

"I’ll only be gone for two minutes."

You reach for the door handle, but his servo shoots forward, blocking your exit.

"Orion," you chide, your tone sharp and reprimanding.

He doesn’t meet your eyes, his apprehension laid bare.

"Please, I do not wish to be alone."

"Two minutes," you say firmly, though your annoyance falters when you see the raw emotion in his optics. Sighing, you place a hand on the edge of his digit, catching his attention. "I’ll be back. I promise."

He believes you, of course he does. He trusts you to return, yes, he even knows it. It doesn't change the fact that he is frightened, he feels alone, and your proximity calms the storm raging through his processor. His whole body is clamoring for you, screaming for you to stay with him. He craves bodily contact, he wants your soft hands to stroke his metal and your lips to whisper sweet nothings. He wants more, he wants to feel the softness, more, more, more.

He takes his servo away.

"Good mech."

As you disappear through the door, Orion buries his face in his hands. Despite his embarrassment, he can’t suppress a grin. He had enjoyed that moment—far too much.

He wants to hear you say it again.

When you return, you’re carrying a blanket, a deck of UNO cards, some snacks, and your laptop. Orion beams at the sight of you but frowns when he notices you shivering.

"Are you cold?" he asks with concern.

"Hmm? A little, but I’ll warm up soon."

Without warning, he gently scoops you up in his servo, handling you with the utmost care. The shock is brief—you don’t even have time to protest before he places you on his chassis. His servo remains loosely wrapped around you as a precaution, but your back presses against his warm metal frame. Tilting your head up to glare at him for pulling such a stunt, you find him already watching you, amusement dancing in his optics.

"Ask next time before you do something like that," you scold lightly.

"I make no promises," he teases, earning a playful flick to his digit.

"I was planning to play UNO, but since you pulled that move, let’s watch a movie instead. Unless you’d rather do something else?"

"I leave myself entirely at your mercy."

He would have been content doing nothing as long as he could hold you close.

"All right, then. A movie it is."

It's hard for him to keep up with the plot when he's overstimulated, but he tries, because your questions encouraging discussion come out of nowhere. And it was just at moments when he started to drift off, when the optics shifted from the tiny screen to you; when there was only you and him in the world. Sometimes, however, he would focus for longer, especially during the romantic scenes. He longs to experience something similar with you, an indestructible, sappy love. To recite poetry into your ear and watch you blush, to announce to everyone how much you mean to him. To bestow expensive gifts, the geodes you mentioned earlier. He needs your tender words, your praise, your touch. You could do whatever you liked with him, and he would give you his spark.

He worries when you fall silent for too long.

"[Name]?" he calls softly, leaning closer to check on you. Relief washes over him when he sees you’ve simply fallen asleep. Poor thing—you must have been exhausted.

Still, a part of him resents it. He wanted to talk to you longer, watch more films, learn more about human romance to win your favor. But he knows his thoughts are selfish. Setting the laptop aside, he carefully covers you with his other servo, creating a cocoon of warmth and safety.

He's not sure he'll be able to recharge. At least not now, when he was too absorbed in devouring you with his optics. You felt safe with him. You gave him your trust. You chose him.

A spark of possessiveness sweeps through his processor. He doesn't want to let you go. He doesn't want you to go to work tomorrow and leave him for eternity. He also knows he shouldn't think that way. The spark goes out.

Watching you sleep, his processor churns with thoughts. You trusted him. He vows to prove his worth tomorrow, to show you just how deep his feelings run.

Because he doesn’t know how much longer he’ll be himself. How much longer he will remain as Orion Pax.

#transformers #transformers x reader #optimus prime x reader #optimus x reader #tfp #obsessed!optimus #orion pax x reader #obsessed!orion

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cottagecore-moss-king · 11 months ago

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Not so Artificial Intelligence Part 2

When Bruce finally managed to get the time to look at the file Danny had added to the bat computer, it was almost patrol, and the rest of the family was filling in to get ready to head out. Even Jason had shown up, but that was probably just because he was bribed by Alfred with leftovers from dinner. Bruce couldn’t really blame him, Alfred’s food was the best in the world, but he does wish that he would show up more often just to hang out with him and his siblings.

Bruce sat in the bat-chair, graciously labeled with a sticker from a recent prank by Stephanie. She had gone around and labeled everything in the bat cave, but added the bat suffix in front. It had taken forever to find most of them, but he allowed some of them to remain.

Finding the new folder was easy, it was labeled FROM DANNY, and left in the middle of the screen. Clicking it open and sipping his fresh coffee he glanced at the first document. The folder was full of notes, pictures and videos, but all of the previews were white, green, or black.

Bruce started to read through the document, and chocked on his coffee at the contents.

Hello Batman and family, I hope this reached you before they do. I didn’t bring this up just incase you knew and were supportive, but how you act and how contaminated you are I will assume you do not. There is a Government Law that declares any being that has come into contact with enough or creates ectoplasm as non-sentient and non-sapient, but at the same time malicious {Abbreviated the AEA}. We are to be turned over to the GIW to be experiment upon and exterminated. This is literal torture, and I have gathered as much evidence as me and my friends could without being caught. I beg you, please be careful if you decide to take these people down. From what is on here, I think that Lazarus Water is a form of corrupted ectoplasm. Also, anyone who has died and come back to life no matter what are counted, and anyone with godly blood within them. Please Please, save us. My parents are the leading “scientists” which is bullshit, and they’ve already tied me down once. I can’t go through that again. Please, Amity and the Infinite Realms need help. If you don’t help us, I’m scared we may be forced to go to war, and I don’t think you can win against the godly dead.

Please, I’m begging you - Danny Fenton {King Phantom}

“You good B?” Nightwing asked strolling over casually. He didn’t know how to answer, how was he supposed to say ‘Oh yeah, just found out that the government calls us non-sentient\sapient, and we are to be experimented and slaughtered. Also if we don’t stop them our worlds probably going to fall and we’re all going to die a painful death.’ That’s a fun conversation to have.

Clearing his throat he finally spoke up.

“Red Robin, Oracle, I need you to help me sort through these, Nightwing, get the Justice league ready for an emergency meeting, call the Dark too. Look at this.”

“Are we sure it’s real though? It could be a prank,” muttered Oracle, though even she doubted her words.

“Even so, the threat is there and we should certainly look through this, and that means the League needs to know.”

Batman carefully mourned the loss of a peaceful evening, and his coffee, he was going to need to leave that at the cave, he had an image to keep.

Nightwing wasn’t smiling anymore, Robin looked concerned, and Red Hood was openly gawking at the screen.

“I’ve called the emergency meeting, you three sort these files out, I’m calling up the JLD now. Guess we should warn Constantine to bring a couple extra bottles huh.” His joke fell flat, but Bruce wonders if he should bring some alcohol and coffee with him, image be dammed.

“Wait a second, godly blood included? They fuckn’ shittin’ on Diana!”

“That’s what your concerned about Todd? Not that the we both fall under these parameters, along with Father and the rest of the collection? I will go fetch Thomas from his chambers, he will need to suit up to follow us to the watchtower.”

“Good idea Damian, tell him to hurry up. Everyone else, in the Zeta Tube, Alfred, you can stay here if you want.” Bruce gathered his laptop and moved the file over, copying and sending it to Tims laptop as well.

“Thank you master Bruce, I will wait for the younger masters then I will be up shortly. Run along now.” Alfred excused with a bow, but even his face was shadowed in worry and thinly veiled anger.

“See you in a bit Alf.” Dick replied, inputting directions to the watchtower in and doing a quick headcount.

With a flash, the dark gloomy cave was replaced by fluorescent lights and the steel infrastructure of the watchtower. Hopping off the platform another flash of light appeared, and Aquaman stepped out. The group filled out as Aquaman politely greeted them. Making their way to the nearest meeting room, Batman and Red Robin began to set things up as the gathered heroes began to sit.

“Hey Nightwing, what’s with the meeting, you never call for an emergency meeting, Blüd rarely has big threats.” Flash mentioned as he zoomed into the meeting room, last as always, and began to dig into his waffle plate. Where he got waffles from, Bruce didn’t want to know, they weren’t serving waffles in the cafeteria today, or yesterday from leftovers.

“This isn’t just Blüdhaven, it’s all of the united States.” He worried, checking over one final time to make sure everyone was here. A collection of the main heroes from the Justice League, they’d need to figure out who counted as ecto-contaminated before throwing people around, and Constantine, Zatanna, and Deadman were gathered to represent Justice League Dark. At least he assumed Deadman was there, as a chair was pulled out and labeled for him. At least they wouldn’t have to race to find him, they could tell him just to stay up in the watchtower if things got bad. Finally, Robin and Signal rushed in, signal tiredly rubbing his eyes and his helmet in Agent A’s hands.

“As some of you know, a person got stuck in the batcomputer a couple months ago. And was only recently released.” Murmurs and imputed questions rose around, and Nightwing promptly ignored them.

“They left behind a file for us, and we were looking through it and discovered many hidden crimes from the US government. They have taken and labeled a whole species and group of people as non-sentient and non-sapient, and have been experimenting and committing genocide on them.” Again, a chorus of questions and yelling went up, and Nightwing had to take a moment to pause. A glance at Martian Manhunter reviled a stone cold face, quietly waiting for more information.

“Oh god… what is this?”

#dc x dp #dc x dp prompt #dc x dp crossover #dcu #dpxdc #dp x dc crossover #danny phantom #danny fenton #bruce wayne #batman #batfam #red robin #red hood #dc robin #justice league #jason todd #dick grayson

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spoonsandtunes · 1 month ago

Text

The Ache of Almost

Pairings: Jasper Hale x Human! reader

A/N: so, ive entered back into my Twilight era. ive been reading the books this time around and have fallen in love with Jasper unfortunately so here is some really long shitty angst i wrote about him. also, i was watching this show Northern Exposure and got the inspired by it for the whole river fiasco.

Warnings: non? implied smut though, nothing gruesome. also not proof read, sorry.

word count: 5.2K (insane i know hang on for me please)

You sat, legs tucked into your chest, in front of your brightly lit computer screen. Your fingers moving furiously over the keyboard of your laptop, as your tried to distract your brain from the chatter downstairs. Your school assignment for History was long over due, sitting in a discarded pile to the right, and no matter how much you had urged yourself to do it, you just couldn't. The paper was on the civil war, a logistical over view of it and the people who played major factors, and as much as you hated to admit it this would be easier to write if Jasper was still around.

Downstairs, you could hear Edwards laugh ring out, louder then it usually did, and you sighed, finally pulling your attention away from your screen. Annoyance crawled slowly under your skin, as you heard Edward and what sounded like Charlie chatter amongst each other.

Realistically, you had no issue with Edward Cullen, no issue with any of the Cullen's actually. You couldn't find it in your heart to hold animosity towards the clan just because Bella was able to handle a life that you yourself could not.

This "matureness" in the words of Esme Cullen was what kept your heart soft, and you found that the ladder, as well as the fact that you knew Edward was here to see your sister first and foremost kept your annoyance at bay.

You tried so hard to keep the awkwardness from you and Jaspers break up from seeping into the cracks of your sister Bella and Edward's relationship, still being friendly and polite as you had always been when, and even before, you and Jasper had gotten together. But, you couldn't say the same for Edward.

You knew he was just looking out for his non-blood brother, and even if he was friendly to you just as you were with him, it seemed as if he couldn't stop himself from slipping in a few comments abouts Jaspers well doing that were suppose to evoke guilt into you. And for that very reason, for the past 3 weeks of you dumping Jasper, you went into hiding whenever Edward would come around for Bella.

There where many things wrong with you and Jaspers relationship. The most obvious being you were human and he was not. You loved it at first, the thrill of a forbidden love, and if Bella could do it, why couldn't you?

You melted in his soft touch, loved how his southern drawl pulled you in. His kisses tender and sweet as if he was scared to break you, which he was, kept you clinging for more. You loved how intimate you two could be without touch, just soft looks across a room and how your days consisted of being deep within the shadows, private and sacred.

Jasper was crazy for you, in love like never before. Your voice had him wrapped around his finger since day one, and your touch would send him on his knees begging for more. His love for you was just as strong as Edwards for Bella, he would even argue that it was stronger.

The issue was, that when you had first met Jasper he was still trying to control his urge to kill everyone around him. Though, when you two started to get closer, he was more in control then when he first met your sister. But things do not change as easily as they come, and even through out your 4 month relationship, there was a very evident reason why you and Jasper had not gone to the next level.

At first, you were okay with it. Sex was never a priority for you. You, like Jasper, shared a very old school outlook on the topic. But what you didn't enjoy, was that even with kissing, or smelling, or sudden movements, Jasper was on the other side of the room, trying to swallow his desire to bite down on your delicate skin.

He would disappear for weeks on end every month or so. He would never tell you where he was going, or when he was going, you would just wake up one morning and he would be gone. A couple days in you would hear from Bella or one of the Cullen family members that he went to "blow off some steam" but never from Jasper himself.

You use to wait around, over at his house constantly to talk with Esme or Alice, in hopes he would appear. Worried sick to your stomach that something had happened to him. Or you would send him a multitude of text messages that went unresponded, you would loiter around certain classes he had in school, and walk home extra late on some days in hopes that you would see him. Of course, you never did, and his family, as well your own, watched from the side lines in pity.

Though, he would always come back, appearing at your doorstep, or in your room later within the twilight air. He would be soft, and apologize, explain he went away to keep you safe and to protect you. He would get on his knees, literally, and hold your torso into his face, breathing in your scent as if he was addicted to it. This very ritual was the part of the reason you stayed so long, he always came back.

Though the anger and worry soon faded, as time past and his disappearing act become a common occurrence. His apologies fell on deaf ears as you shrugged him off and went on your way after he would appear out of the blue.

This was not the only thing that put a strain on your relationship. You had only lived in forks for a short time, obviously moving back here when Bella did, but you had always loved the summers that came before the move.

Unlike Bella, your summers were filled with amazing memories of swimming down at La Push and helping your dad grill up food as Billy Black and his son would come over. You would spent endless nights running and biking through town, Jacob by your side, playing make-believe through the dense forests and much more.

When you had moved over to Forks permanently, you were a bit sad at first for leaving your mother, but you knew Charlie needed this the most. Your extraverted nature did not diminish in the gloomy town, in fact day one you reunited with Jacob and went down to the Clearwater's home, where you befriended one of your now best friends, Leah Clearwater.

At first, things weren't so hostile, the two opposing sides ignored each other like they always had. But when you and Jasper had made it official, it was obvious tensions started to rise. Jasper hated all your friends, calling them names you don't even want to repeat, and vice versa. At one point it become so bad that you just stopped telling Jasper, or Leah, who you were hanging out with all together as when you did, it felt as if the insults towards the other group and lectures where never ending.

The issues with your relationship, the obvious differences between you and Jasper seemed to start pilling up. And so, you decided maybe it would be best to end it, or at least take a break. You had pulled him aside one night, when you two where at his home, after dinner. He took your actions as a flirty invitation, and pulled you upstairs, kissing your lips. But you pushed him away, and broke the news to him. You wanted to end it.

From all the ways you imagined that Jasper would react, it did not prepare you for the immense turmoil that swept over his features. The man dropped to his knees, almost as if you had stabbed him with a stake through the heart, you had never seen him cry before- and now you saw him groveling at your feet, tears glistening in his eyes. He begged, and pleaded, apologizing for things that he himself could not control. It was almost enough to make you take your words back. almost.

You cried as well, and begged him to stand up, but he refused too. You knew breaking up with him was going to be hard, but you didn't know it was going to be this terrible. You still loved him, you didn't know if you were very not going to love him, but you wanted a normal life. A normal boyfriend, a normal relationship. One where your boyfriend could stand being in the same room as you, where he didn't have to disappear for weeks on end so he didn't do anything unspeakable. You wanted a boyfriend who liked your friends, and vice versa, who you didn't only get to hang out with on rainy days. Where you didn't need to tip toe around whenever you wanted to touch him.

Staying in the shadows was nice while it lasted, but soon your heart yearned and ached to reach out for something more.

In an instant, the ache of the situation washed away, and anger replaced it. Jasper was hurt, you knew it, and you knew how unfair it was to have to leave because of things that he could not control. So, you stood there and let him take out his anger, obviously holding back immensely. you let him yell and curse, only interrupting a few times to put in your input. His accent grew stronger with every word that tumbled out of his mouth, and at one point you didn't even understand him. But when he asked you to leave his house, and to never come back, you understood that plenty.

The tears didn't stop when you left his room, still hearing his swears flying out of his mouth even when you weren't in view anymore. Retreating back downstairs, you felt a wave of shame and embarrassment wash over you as his whole family, and Bella, sat in the living room, as rigid as a rock. You knew they had heard the whole thing, there was no way they didn't-not with the level of volume that Jasper had yelled at. You swallowed hard, and wiped your face as you turned to look at everyone "I-I'm sorry, i think i have to go now...my dad-" An immense thunderous crash coming from Jaspers room interrupted your string of excuses, and only you and Bella flinched at it, every one else staying perfectly still. Esme just nodded and knowingly she smiled at you, allowing you to leave with no other explanation.

This was about 3 weeks ago, and Jasper had not tried to contact you or swarm you since, which you were surprised about actually, you did assume he was going to track your every move.

Your stomach growled for the 3rd time within the hour and you sighed, looking at the time on the bottom of your computer. The glow read 7pm, and you were starving.

You pushed your chair back and stood up, the chatter downstairs was still evident but you couldn't hide any longer, you just hoped that Edward would leave it be.

You left your room and skipped downstairs, Charlie, Edward and Bella coming into view from the bottom steps. They all looked up as you walked into the room, going straight to the kitchen of the open floor plan. "Hey guys," You said smiling, your dad nodding at you, and Bella and Edward waving.

"Are you getting food?" Charlie asked, as he rose from the reclining chair he was lounging in and walked in behind you. You just hummed, and put some food in the microwave, but before you could turn it on, Bella and Edward where already in the kitchen speaking to you.

"Actually, a few of us were going to go out for food," Edward said casually "why don't you join us? it'll be fun." You turned and eyed him and Bella warily, you did not like where this was going.

Charlie nodded at the idea to show his approval, as he maneuvered around you to put his empty beer bottle in the sink. "Who is 'a few of us'?" You asked suspiciously.

"Us, Rosalie, Emmet, jasper, Alice" Bella said, and you didn't miss how she casually said your ex- boyfriends name. You just shook your head, and looked to your food to start the microwave.

"I don't think so, thanks though" You tried to keep your voice light, but you knew Edward could hear the strain in it with his vampire powers. You're an ass Edward you though, and you knew by Edwards smirk that he could read what you were thinking.

"Are you sure," Bella said "Come on, it'll be fun." You just sighed, and didn't say anything - knowing if you did, something harsh would come out that you didn't really mean.

"I still have to work on my paper, I barley have it started" You say after a long pause, and it wasn't a lie. Charlie looked over and nodded at your words, silently telling you that he approved of you staying home for your school work.

"It's Saturday" Edward commented, in which you just gave him a look and went back to glaring at the whirling microwave.

The minute your food came out, you slipped back upstairs into your room, and went into the solitude of the 4 walls.

For the next 4 hours, you pushed as hard as you could, truly diving into your paper like never before, finally completing it. But, you stilled sighed knowing that even with all the effort you put into the paper, it was going to one of your lowly graded ones. Jasper usually helped you with your history assignments.

Looking at the time, you sighed and spun around in your chair. You doubted Bella was back, in fact you wouldn't be surprised if she spent the night with Edward.

You rose from you seat, thinking that Charlie may be still be awake, hearing the low buzz from the television from downstairs. Old house, thin walls. You can practically hear someone breathe on the other side of the house.

You quietly made your way down the hallway and half way down the stairs, crouching on the step and looking through the railings towards the living room. The room was dark, and the low blue light from the TV illuminated the figure of your sleeping dad, who was sprawled out on his reclining chair.

You sighed, and made your way fully down the stairs and into the living room, turning off the TV and putting a blanket on your dad, who did not stir even a little bit. Seeing him sleep made you decide it was time for bed yourself, with how late it was getting. Quickly getting ready for bed and under your covers, you sighed and closed your eyes, praying you would have a good night sleep.

Your sleep was restless, like it was the past 3 weeks, and you woke up at 5:30 am. You tossed and turned, trying to force yourself to sleep again, but your mind was wide awake and your body was restless, filled with energy.

Rolling out of bed, you shivered as your feet touched your cold laminate flooring. You padded over to your window and peeked behind the curtains.

You were surprised to see that the sky was clear, the ground was not as wet as it was the past couple days, and you wondered if the the sun was going to show its face today. It had just started to slowly rise, the twilight sky turning over to the blue hour. Maybe summer was finally arriving, it was late May after all.

But Forks summers where never as hot as you liked, and the lakes had seaweed bottoms that created muddy puddles around the shore. So even if summer was around the corner, you knew not to get too excited.

Turning your attention away from the weather, you looked towards the front of the house. Charlies cruiser was not in the drive way, you guessed he had already left for work. A bit earlier then usual, but nothing to be alarmed about.

For the next 30 minutes, you went about doing your morning routine. For the past 3 weeks, your morning schedules would consist of you making your bed, eating a good breakfast and trying to get some work in. Whether it be school work, or waiting around for your shift at the diner to start, you always tried to keep yourself occupied, because when you didn't you mind would wander to the uneasy feeling in your core you had since the day you ended things with Jasper.

You knew that the love between you and Jasper was different, you could see the way he looked at you, admiration and infatuation deep in his core. You were so much more then just a girlfriend to him, you knew that and so did everyone around you too. Even if he himself never let the words come out of his mouth, he knew you were what he had been waiting for his whole life. from humanhood to vampire, he was seeking for his mate, and you were finally that.

Of course though, he had yet to tell you this but the rest of the Cullen's knew how easy it was for vampires, like werewolves, to imprint on their loved ones.

Once you had finished your usual routine, you glanced at the clock. It had only been 30 minutes, and the sky outside was still a dusty blue.

Your eyes swept around you room, it was still cold but it reminded you of Jaspers icy skin so you didn't mind much. Hanging on the back of your closet door was your rain coat, and you decided that getting in some movement was not the worst idea.

So, you changed in well fitted jeans, and pulled your coat over your thin PJ Shirt before heading out into the street.

The air was cool and crisp, and burnt your lungs. The lawn still had a thin layer of dew on it and the starting's of shrubs at the edge of the forest trail by the house was also no different.

You didn't walk this trail often, unlike Bella and Edward, only a few times with Jacob or Charlie.

The trail went deep, and winded around trees and fallen trunks. You let your thoughts run wild, hoping that soon they would run out.

Though, they seemed to grow stronger every waking minute and for the first time since the day you left Jaspers house, you felt soft tears prick your eyes. This was a lot harder then you though it would be, but it was the only thing that made sense. You couldn't live your life hiding your loved one from the word, and unlike your sister, the desire to become a vampire yourself was non existent. You loved being human, you loved the fragileness of it, the realness of it, and the beauty of it.

Jasper admired this, but even though you knew he would never want to condemn you to what he believed to be his own personal hell, the thought of you growing old and dying shook him to the core.

This was another issue with your relationship. Talk of the future, kids and homes and white picket fences where truly not something that ever came up. When they did, they were soft and sad and the topic would be hung heavy in the air between you too.

Without knowing it, you had walked so deep in the woods, that the trail had come to an end as the gravel beneath your feet started to thin out. You contemplated turning back and ending your walk, but up ahead a deer stood stunned in its spot, looking at you.

"Oh," You breathed and stopped walking, as the deer stood so still you almost mistook it for a fake "Hello sweetheart" you cooed so softly, and took a very soft, cautious step forward.

The deer's ears perked and you stopped moving, staying in your spot, you sighed and looked around your surroundings. A fallen mossy tree trunk was in between you and the deer, acting as a wall that you knew the deer regarded as a shield. Before you could speak to it again, the deer looked out into the distance of the dense forest before it jumped in it spot and bounded away.

You stood there, a bit stunned at the random event, but paid no mind to it and moved forward to step over the trunk and continue your walk. Deer's were already such jumpy creatures, so you didn't feel an uneasiness from its skittishness and you had to admit the encounter gave you a new sense of calmness that washed over you.

Walking a few feet deeper in the woods, the dirt beneath your feet morphed into wet pebble stone, and looking up you noticed you had come across a small river. It was beautiful, the rocks all different shades of brown and grey covering the bottom.

You sighed, and squatted at the shore carefully so you didn't fall in, and picked up a small twig. You tried to poke a few rocks around, but the river was a lot deeper then you expected, so the stick barely reached. You noted that one day you could come here and swim, it seemed peaceful.

Rising up again, you turned around to leave and almost screamed in surprised.

Jasper was standing father back, still covered by the trees and moss, staring out at you almost sheepishly.

"Jasper- you scared me," You said not really thinking, and Jasper frowned a bit automatically making you feel bad. "What are you doing here" you said softly, and swallowed heavily.

"I'm sorry, i didn't mean to scare you" he started and stepped out into the clearing. He looked the same, just a bit more tired, if that was possible. His hair was disheveled and he wore a pair of jeans and his red flannel with his sleeves rolled up showcasing his lean muscles and battle scars. "You didn't come to dinner last night, and well...i just-" He swallowed his tongue, and his accent sent shivers down your body.

You knew vampires didn't eat, not human food at least, so you didn't know why Jasper tried to keep up the charade of the excuse Edward and Bella made last night for Charlies sake. But you supposed that Carslie or Esme did make some thing for Bella to munch on. So maybe it wasn't much of a charade after all.

"Were you following me?" You didn't know if you wanted him to say yes or no, your stomach felt anxious just being in Jaspers presence.

Jasper sighed, and ran his hand through his hair "I just..." The fact that he felt your emotions made it harder for him to think, and he wondered if you would mind if he used his powers to calm you down, but he knew that would most likely not end very well. "I miss you." He spoke softly, and came closer.

"Jasper," you went to protest, pushing down the fact that you missed him too, but as you looked down at you feet you felt a small splash "Oh! My keys!" You groaned as your house keys fell from your coats shallow pocket and into the deep river.

Jasper stepped forward. "I'm sorry." he began like he had threw them in and started to push up his already rolled sleeves higher "Here let me get them"

You looked at him, and shook your head "No, no" You sighed, you could feel a mild headache coming on. "No. I'll get them."

Jasper stood as still as stone, and eyed you, "Are you sure, i don't mind" He said and watched you intently. "This river is glacier fed. It'll be cold." He warned worriedly.

"No it's fine. Its my keys" You huffed, you really did not want help from your ex-boyfriend. That small action would make life so much more complicated then it already was, you just knew it.

You stepped a bit off to the side of the rocks, finding a drier patch before glancing at your ex-boyfriend. He watched you intently, a look you couldn't quite read in his eyes. You took a shaky breath, and slipped off our shoes, then slowly took off your coat.

The keys had fallen deep in the river, and you were so tempted to leave them, but you knew if you didn't get them Jasper would. So you took a shaky breath and bite your lip, slowly taking your first step in the water.

You hissed, not expecting it to be as cold as it was, and you felt the water seep through your socks and the fabric around your ankles, making you feel heavy. The shock send a shiver up your spine, and your breathing become a big rigid.

Your eyes looked down through the clear water and spotted your keys logged between two large rocks, you glanced at Jasper who had not moved a muscle. He stood still, his breath shallow as he watched every move you made. His eyes hade turned dark, a coal black colour. Something about his interaction was strangely intimate and you didn't know if that was the cold water fogging your brain or if it was just the fact that you stood in front of Jasper in a thin white PJ shirt, breathing heavy and practically half of you drenched in water.

Silently, you bent down to put your arm in the water, trying to keep majority of your self dry, straining your neck so your hair wouldn't get wet. Jasper shuffled, and he looked like he wanted to say something, but he held his mouth shut. His jaw was tense, and his fists were balled at his sides.

You fully looked at him, and made eye contact, taking another shaky breath due to the glacier fed river, and tried to get your fingers to grab the keys. Though, they were logged tight, and your fingers only grazed the metal rings the keys sat on. There was no other choice but to go fully in.

Determined, you closed your eyes, and dunked your head into the water. Your fingers wrapped around the keys and tugged hard, pulling them from out between the rocks. Rising up, you gasped for air, and took a moment to reign your senses.

You evened out your breathing, and turned to look at Jasper, who in his shocked stance cracked a small smirk. You pushed your hair from your face as he spoke "who knew you could be so cool" his southern draw made you weak in the knees, and you pulled at your shirt so it wouldn't be as see through.

You couldn't help but smile though, and step out from the water to grab your shoes. You sat on a drier rock, sniffling and wrapping your coat around you to stop any shivering. Jasper watched you, and his heart ached that he couldn't warm you up with his icy cold body.

"I'm sorry..." You spoke after a pause, and Jasper slowly sat down next to you, your thighs touching. The feeling made you sigh, and your head ache seemed to be gone. You couldn't tell if it Jasper was using his powers, or if the icy cold water put you in some type of shock. You decided that his presence was just a comfort, anything else would have been a lie. "I-I hope we can still be friends." You turned your head to look at the stunning man next to you, who was already looking at you with udder admiration.

He just shook his head "I can't just be friends with you."

You sighed, fearing this response. "Why?" Both your voices where low, the sound of the river and other wildlife being the only thing to cause a ruckus.

"I love you too much to...let you go on with your life without me in it," He paused, and you could tell he seemed to hesitate on what he wanted to say. You urged him to go on, slowly nodding and placing your wet hand on top of his knee. "You're my mate. I need you, I can't do-" He gestured around him, but his eyes didn't look away from yours for a second. "This- without you."

A shaky breathe exited your lips. You had heard about mates before when learning about werewolves and vampires from those around you, but you never expected to have one yourself. You guessed though that Edward and Bella- or Rosalie and Emmet where prime examples. But all the examples of mates around you were all one being. Rosalie and Esme with Carslie and Emmet where vampires. Bella wanted to be a vampire. Non of the examples in your life showcased how mates worked with two different species.

"I like being human," You whispered, and let your fingers start to draw circles on Jaspers knee subconsciously. "I can't be who you want me to be."

"I would never ask you to change that." Jasper deadpanned, and he looked eager to show you he wouldn't. You smiled at him, knowing no matter how much he believed that, he would ask you one day. Maybe not tomorrow but 30 years down the line the conversation would come up.

"But you will," You admitted and Jasper shook his head furiously, tears starting to surface in his eyes. He looked desperate to reach out for you. You repeated yourself "But you will- Jasper-" You called his name sternly as a string of 'no's came tumbling from his mouth. "You will." He took a shaky breath and you bit your lip, he couldn't argue with that.

He knew himself, deep down he would bring the idea up once in your life. The thought of you growing old and dying shook him to his core, it was a paralyzing fear. He would beg you to let someone turn you when things started to look a bit to serious with your future. "Then- I..." He struggled to speak, this conversation was not going the way he hoped it would and if he still had a beating heart it would have stopped by now. "I don't know what to do." He said shakily.

You brough your hand off his knee and slowly intertwined your fingers with his, his icy coldness brining some type of comfort to yourself. Jasper sighed, and closed his eye for a brief minute feeling your warm fingers, and you gazed upon your intertwined hands. His thumb drew circles on the back of your hand, and you sighed, leaning your head on his shoulder. The sun had fully rose now, and the rays peaked through the trees, falling on Jasper. He didn't care though, there was much more important things on his mind then his sparkling skin.

Your eyes roamed his diamond complexation, watching as a string of rainbows practically bounced off of him. It finally set in then, you two really were different, and you had no idea what you should do. "I don't know either.." You admitted, a comfortable silence falling between the two lovers.

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sirxlla · 2 months ago

Text

The Difference Between Red & Blue

-------------------------------------------------

Warnings: 🌸 fluff

Prompt: accidentally overhearing him gush about you to the 118 (requested by @scorpiobabino )

Notes: female reader, italics are actions and thoughts.

-With that said, it's all under the cut-

Finally, a day off...you had been working overtime at the dispatch center after a massive earthquake hit the city. Several call centers had gone down, and calls were redirected to you. Limited computers, traffic, several collapsed buildings, power issues, and all meant they had tried to get people in to cover the spots of the current dispatchers, but it took almost fifty hours straight until they finally did.

Fifty hours doesn't sound like a lot in the grand scheme of things, but it's so much worse when you're awake the entire time. People needed help, and just like your golden retriever boyfriend, you had the need to help people regardless of how tired you were.

Thankfully, since you were in the call center so long, they had had time to clean up the streets a bit, and traffic was a lot more normal. It had been a hot minute since you'd eaten, so you decided to pull into a fast food place for some food. Evan was on the way back to your apartment at the station, probably wishing he could also go home like you. You bought some food and coffee for the guys and gal at the department.

You were about to shout out to them about the food and coffee in the arms until you heard Buck speaking.

"No, she's just perfect. I really do feel bad for her, they still haven't got other dispatchers in. They're all slammed."

"Yeah, Maddie said it's awful, they just let her go home, though. Thankfully, Jee's sitter is just the neighbour." Chimney replies to Buck as he sits down, the entire group of them look exhausted, but that spark of happiness still shines in Buck's eyes when he speaks about you.

"Actually, I've been meaning to ask you if you knew any places to get a really unique ring. Like something that says 'I love you and get you completely.' I really love her, and I want something that looks more like it came out of an ancient, abandoned elven cave or like something Smaug would hoard."

"Is that Game Of Thrones?"

"Lord of the Rings!"

"There's a difference?" Chimney asks as he's almost falling asleep, his palm pressed against his face, his elbow agaisnt the table.

"There's a difference?" Buck asks as if Chimney's mixing up the colors red and blue, his nerdy side coming out quite a bit.

"That's like asking if Star Wars and Marvel are the same. Come on! My girlfriend and I watch this stuff together all the time, and I just want her to have something no one else has, but I'm looking for an affordable ring."

"I don't know, man, try that Etsy website Maddie keeps buying things from, I think I saw some rings on there-" Chimney immediately stops talking, which prompts Buck to turn around. He sees you and he's happy to see you, of course, but now you know he's planning to propose.

"Hey!" He tries to play it cool, like he wasn't talking about engagement rings, as he sees you enter the room with your arms full of drink carriers and your backpack full of sausage biscuits. "Please tell me you didn't hear all that."

"You don't have to go to the mines of Mordor for me, Baby." You teased as you heard it, he figured, but was hoping you didn't. You place all the coffees down as well as the food, which prompts the rest of the 118 to scramble for it, mainly the coffee, they all shout thank yous and terms of appreciation.

"I want it to be perfect, you're gonna have it forever, and all your other jewelry and clothes and everything is so unique, and your ring needs to be too. Almost as perfect as you. Not generic like most other people." He smiles and pulls you closer. "I didn't even know you were off work....You look exhausted."

"Yeah, I forgot to text. I'm sorry, I'm awful especially when Im tired."

"Stay here, you're much too tired to drive. The couch is pretty comfy, and you can borrow my headphones to block out the sound." He rubs your hips and hugs you gently. He's happy you're safe and that you don't seem too upset about the idea of being married to him. Evan smiles to himself and sways you both back and forth for a while, just being in the moment with his now soon-to-be fiancée.

-> Masterlist

-> Send me prompts if you'd like

#oliver stark #911 on fox #911 abc #911 show #evan buckley x reader #evan buckley

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sweetimpurity · 1 year ago

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I Think I'll Keep You 4

a/n: Thank you for your patience! More to come for this story, it's only the beginning! Finally got my new computer which will make writing much easier and more fun!! Love ya!

w.c.: 8.3k NSFW MINORS DNI rated p for plot

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3

His eyes widen and he has to fight back more tears right then and there. You’re taking him to the hospital after all he’s done? After all he said? “Oh…” He mumbles, standing there ready to follow your lead. He’d follow you anywhere at this point. “I couldn’t sleep so… and I assume you couldn’t either.” You comment softly. The exhaustion written on both your faces. With midterms and classes, bad sleep and the emotional tug of war this week, you’re both due for a nap. But his hand needs to be taken care of first. He can’t keep walking around in pain like that.

“Does it hurt?” You ask as the two of you start walking down the hall. “No… it’s not that bad.” He mumbles, pulling his hoodie on and clenching his hand painfully in the pocket. “Don’t lie.” You say. Something you feel like you keep saying. Why is it so hard for him to just be honest? Even with himself. “It… it does hurt. A lot.” He finally says in a sigh, both getting to the elevator and going down in silence to get to the lobby. He’s looking down at the floor. Exhaustion etched on his face like yours. But you keep an eye on him. Observing his body language. All the things he’s not saying with words. He seems sorry. He seems heartbroken like you. But it’s hard to trust him after everything.

The two of you get to the lobby, hearing the rain pouring on the windows. The white noise of the rain would be soothing if it didn’t mean you had to walk out in that storm. “My car’s on the street.” You pull up your hood, keys jingling in your pocket. He just looks up at your face, nodding softly. He just wants to hear that you forgive him. That you don’t hate him.

You both head out, quickly marching down the walkway to your car. Each shielding yourself from the assault of pouring rain as you rush to the car already running. Finding warmth and safety inside away from the rain. As soon as you can see through the splatters on the windshield, you’re driving off, through the city streets to get to the emergency room. There’s no one on the roads this time of night. And you’re hoping there won’t be tons of people in the emergency room once you get there.

“Hey so um…” He starts, after a bit of silence, driving through the city streets. “I… I’m-”

“Let’s just get there, okay? Let’s just go and get there and…” You sigh, the words falling off. Not wanting to cut him off but also not wanting right now to be when you both have this conversation. He swallows thickly, nodding and falling back into the quiet of the warm car. Clenching his fingers in his pocket and bouncing his knee gently in anxiety. You notice it out of the corner of your eye. You seem to notice everything about him.

…

“...his hand, he’s been having swelling and bruising for a few days now…” You explain kindly to the receptionist once you’re both in the waiting room, standing at the front desk. Miguel standing a bit like a lost puppy behind you, listening to you talk to the receptionist there. “Alright, the doctor can take a look once she’s done with another patient. If you can just fill out these forms and have a seat, it should be about 30 minutes.” She smiles and hands you a clipboard and a pen. “Thank you. And could he please get some ice or something?” You smile and ask. The woman nods politely and going to grab an ice pack from the other room. You both start walking over to the waiting room area, looking over the form in your hands. Taking a seat by the fish tank and settling in to wait a little while. Miguel sits right beside you, running the good hand through his dampened hair from the rain. He glances down at the form in your lap. Then up at the side of your face. Wanting to reach out and touch your skin. Kiss your cheek. Remembering what it feels like to melt into your arms. Thinking of all the ways he can beg for, earn your forgiveness. Just as he’s about to speak- “Here you go…” The receptionist is there, an ice pack outstretched for him to take, breaking him out of his thoughts. He forces a smile, taking the ice pack and setting it over his hand. “Thank you.” He smiles gently. Watching the woman walk away.

He looks back, watching you write down his name on the form. Thinking he can probably do this himself. Before he can interrupt you’re asking him for the information.

“Birthday?” You ask, ready to fill it in. “You don’t have to do that…” He mumbles softly, reaching his left hand over to you. “You can write with that hand?” You ask him skeptically, raising your brow. It’s his right hand that’s out of commission. “We need this to be legible, I’ll just do it.” You wave him off and he sighs in sleepy defeat. Although he’s too tired to even care at this point. He’s more grateful that you’re even here right now, that he’s even here right now. That you’re helping him like this, let alone talking to him.

“October 13, 2001.” He sighs, watching your neat handwriting fill in the little lines. “That just passed…” You mutter in realization, writing the date down. “Why didn’t you tell me when it was your birthday?” You sigh, looking up and gazing straight ahead at the empty chairs across the room. “That was like… two thursdays ago…” You grumble. “Sorry…” He sighs, not knowing what else to say for it. He didn’t tell you because he didn’t think it mattered. His mind is a mess. You look over at him, seeing the look on his face. That he really is defeated. Not his usual self. “It’s fine just…” Your words trail off. The silence heavy between you two.

“You can tell me stuff like that.” You suddenly say much more confidently. Looking over at him, making him meet your eye. And he swallows hard, not knowing really what to say. “You were leaving the next day and I didn’t want to distract you…” He admits softly.

“Your birthday is not a distraction… it’s special.”

Special?

He nods, averting your gaze. Thinking to himself. There’s nothing special about him.

“Place of birth.” You ask. “Uh… New York…” He replies softly, shaking those thoughts away, adjusting the ice on his knuckles. Bearing through the ache that comes with the cold on the hot swelling. You write down the information, continuing on. He’s quiet beside you, only answering when you ask him for information. Because his mind is occupied mapping out things he needs to talk about. He wants to apologize again, for real this time and explain himself. That’s the least he can do. Even though he feels like he’s 10 years old again for some reason. Feeling like you’ll be upset with him no matter what he says. No matter what he does. And he deserves all of it.

“Emergency contact?” You ask. Distracting him from his thoughts. “Uh…” He sighs, rubbing the back of his neck. “Like your mom or dad or something…” You encourage, ready to write down whatever he chooses. “I… don’t want them to call my dad…” He admits softly, staring at the sheet on the clipboard. “So your mom then?” You assume, readying yourself for the contact info. “No…” He mutters, shaking his head, leaning back in his seat. Looking up from the form, you look at his face. Not quite knowing how to read it right now. You know he doesn’t like to talk about his parents at all. You’ve only heard about his brother and that’s it. But you didn’t think I’d be so bad that he doesn’t even want to call them in case of an emergency.

“Okay… that’s okay we can figure out something else.” You offer softly. For some reason, instinctively, wanting to protect him right now from whatever it is he’s feeling. When it comes to his parents at least. “Yeah…” He mumbles, staring down at the ice on his hand and folding the corner of the plastic, fidgeting.

You sigh. Not really wanting to get into everything right now. Just wanting to get back to your dorm and sleep. He needs sleep too. This week has been hell. So many weighted moments pass between the two of you. Silently sitting and listening to the bubbles in the fish tank constantly going. The bubbles disturbing the still waters surface and yet infusing the water with all the oxygen the life within needs. Disturbance pumping life into the already living. The living need disturbance to know they’re alive.

He hears the sound of the pen scribbling on the clipboard. Tired eyes looking over to your lap. The emergency contact. A lump in his throat watching you fill in your name, your address, your phone number. All for him. All of this for him? How could he even begin to deserve it? He feels a huge rush of relief and watches the pen tip move across the paper. Until it gets to “Relationship:”

“The doctor can see you now.” The receptionist suddenly says, bringing you both out of silence. Grabbing the clipboard, your keys, phone, standing up and ready to get this done and get out of here. Although there’s a part of Miguel that feels this is a last goodbye. Like things will never be the same after tonight. Maybe that’s a good thing.

…

“Alright, so the fractures are here… here… and then a smaller one there. And we’re going to go ahead with the plaster cast so we can make sure everything lines up nicely.” The doctor says, pointing and gesturing to the x-ray on the wall. It’s been about half an hour now of x-rays and examinations. He has two broken fingers and part of his wrist is compromised too.

“We’ll see how you do with the cast and have you come back in a couple weeks. There should be no reason for surgery if all goes well.” She says. Nodding to the two of you and grabbing some paperwork from the drawers in the room.

“Will he have any sort of pain relief while this is going on?” You ask, concern on your face. Miguel can see it. It makes his chest hurt. You’re such an angel and he’s such a dick.

“Yes, I’ll put in the prescription for painkillers and some antibiotics and you can pick it up tonight… I can send it to the 24 hour pharmacy pretty close to your campus if that works?… I recommend starting it as soon as you can and it will really help with the swelling.” She nods and writes down a slip for his prescription. “Thank you.” You smile and take the slip, Miguel soon following with his own quiet ‘thank you’.

“I’ll be right back and then we can get this cast on, okay?” The doctor clicks her pen, taking her computer and leaving the room to go get the supplies to make up Miguel’s cast.

If it were darker in this room, you’d be falling asleep. But the fluorescent lights blind you. Sitting in the chair next to the exam table, unable to resist resting your head on the table Miguel’s sitting on. Looking down at the almost finished document on the clipboard. Deciding what to write. It’s stupid, it shouldn't matter that much. It doesn’t matter so much if it’s just for his emergency contact; just that the information is in there. Girlfriend? No. Partner? Probably not. Where do you stand? More importantly… Where do you want to stand with him? It’s not just his decision at the end of the day and you’re trying to stop letting him call most of the shots. What do you want to be? Do you want to be his girlfriend? Do you actually want that? Or has his behavior over the past month and a half shown you that he can’t be a good partner even if he wanted to? It’s late; you’re tired; why must you make this decision right now when everything is still so fucked up? Closing your eyes, laying your head on the edge of the table, you’re playing a dangerous game. Will you be able to open them again once you pass the threshold?

“I’m sorry.” He says. Coaxing your eyes back open, looking over at him.

“Miguel-”

“Please… I need to say something…” He insists softly. Not looking at you, staring at the floor, trying to keep that list in his head. “... a lot of things…”

He sighs, rubbing his good hand down the fabric of his sweatpants, nervously. Like all the sentences he’s thinking are the most idiotic combinations of words strung together. You watch him a bit wide eyed, just waiting for the words to come out.

“I’m sorry for the way I acted. What I said. It was the wrong way to go about this… everything.” He sighs. Trying his best to be honest and hoping you won’t throw it back in his face. Why is that always his first thought?

“I was a jerk. And then when I tried to… apologize I just… was an even bigger jerk.”

He admits. Glancing over at you to see your reaction. Feeling an odd sense of ease at the soft expression on your face. You’re really listening.

“I was not drunk on Sunday. I promise you. I went to a stupid party and… had a few beers but nothing… major.” He explains. Checking off the boxes in his head. All the things that went wrong, all the things he needs to apologize for. You look down and back at him. Feeling both satisfaction from his explanation and regret over this entire situation.

“And Dana… she’s… always hanging around me and… but I didn’t do anything with her on Sunday. I tell her no and she's still just all over me and... I’m not sleeping with her, I’m not sleeping with anyone. It was just you.” He says, looking in your eyes. And you believe it’s true. That’s the thing you regret. Jumping to conclusions the moment you smelled Dana’s perfume on him. That probably wasn’t right to do and there was no reason for it. But his response to it all was still uncalled for.

“I don’t want you to hate me. Please… I don’t think I can take it. But I know I deserve it.” He whispers. Looking away, staring at the linoleum floor.

“Can I tell you something… personal?” He suddenly asks. His eyes locked on the checkered pattern on the floor.

“Of course…” You hum, giving him your full attention. This is a big deal. Getting him to share this much. Connecting with him like this after feeling so far away. He swallows hard. Thinking hard. Why must this all be so hard for him?

“I’ve never really been in a relationship before.” He admits softly. You’re shocked to say the least. He’s always been the player type and had girls all around him. But never a relationship? Not even in high school? Seems impossible for someone like him. “Hm…” You hum. Mostly to let him know you’re actively listening. And not judging.

“My parents um…” He starts, fidgeting anxiously. “Ever since I was little… like since I was born… my parents always… cheated on each other?” He admits. You’re stunned into silence and he keeps going…

“It wasn’t like… an open marriage or anything…” Your face softens in sadness hearing his admission. Your heart snapping in two. “Now that I’m older I know the language but… as a kid I never understood.” He explains. A thoughtful look on his face like he’s thought all of these things a million times but never uttered a single word about it out loud.

The correlation between the two admissions is becoming more clear. Never having a relationship because the one relationship he’s supposed to look up to, his parents, is filled with betrayal and distrust. “I’m not saying… that that’s an excuse I’m just… I-I don’t know…” He sighs, shaking his head.

You just listen and watch him in silence. Feeling three things. Honored that he would share this with you. Responsibility to keep this information guarded. And heartbreak, thinking about that kind of pain, and that he feels the need to explain all of this.

“You ever think about like… getting too comfortable and then… when everything goes to shit… that’s your own fault right?” He asks more directly now, looking over at you. Maybe he does want an answer. “Like when you tell yourself that someone really cares about you… and then turns out they don’t. Not as much as you think?”

“No. I don’t think that’s your fault.” You finally speak now that he wants an answer. Genuinely. He looks in your eyes. You want to hear more. It’s the most he’s ever opened up to let you in his head.

“I can’t let myself feel that way.” He sighs. Looking up at the ceiling and letting out a deep breath. You know this is really hard for him.

“You think I make you… feel like you can’t be comfortable?” You ask softly, trying to clarify, trying to understand him.

“No you… make me feel… very… comfortable.” He admits in a sigh. Like the words keep getting stopped but he pushes through, forcing them out. The words would be impossible if not for his efforts.

You pause, thinking about what he said. Remembering when he said you made him feel steady. That moment meaning so much more now. You make him feel comfortable but he can’t allow himself to feel comfortable?

“And when you started… trying to tell me how you were feeling…” He sighs. “I just panicked and…” His words trail off, you take a deep breath. Remembering Sunday night, asking him about Dana, about the beer, on the cusp of telling him you were falling for him. That confusion and anger. Remembering what he said about messy feelings, about not ruining what you two had. When he said you weren’t supposed to happen. It all makes a lot more sense now. "I don't know what I'm feeling... I don't think I ever really know."

“I think that’s why I usually only… spend one night with someone and then… it’s over. I’m an asshole, I know… I wasn’t thinking of you that first night. At least not at the start.” He admits. Which makes sense. He feels guilty knowing he’s never been fair to his partners or himself. Plowing through any sort of feeling that might arise. But when you came along, that all became much harder. Not harder; impossible. His feelings for you were impossible to ignore. “But you’ve never left my mind since then.”

“You’re the longest I’ve ever… stuck with someone I guess. Or that you’ve stuck with me.” He says softly. Stealing glances at you, fearing your reaction just a bit. You’re shocked to say the least. A month and a half? He’s really never gotten closer to anyone else before?

Being his. That’s what you’ve thought of all this time. Because that’s how it always was. He would ask you to be his, tell you to admit it and you always said yes, you always complied. Because you wanted it to be true.

“Are you afraid that if you and I were together… that I’d cheat?” You ask, being careful around his feelings. Thinking he must be afraid to go back to those feelings brought by his parents. When they cheated on each other, they cheated him too. You want to treat his feelings with sensitivity unlike everyone else it seems.

He’s silent for a few moments. Thoughtful. “Maybe. Probably.” He admits. Which is reasonable if he’s been dealing with those kinds of trust issues since he was a little boy. “But I think I was… just scared to lose you. Like losing you is scarier than not having you at all.”

“But I couldn’t not have you. I couldn’t.” He sighs. “I was selfish and I’m sorry.”

He stares at the floor, all regret and heartbreak. So many things laid out in the open. You almost don’t know what to say. Almost.

“Miguel…” You address him, standing up and stepping around the small room for a moment. Then focusing back on him.

“I forgive you.”

He instantly looks up at you. He could cry. Relief in the purest form shot right into his soul.

“I can’t relate to your feelings with your parents and… everything. But that doesn’t mean I can’t understand. Doesn’t mean I don’t want to understand.” You say softly. He nods in understanding. His heart feeling a lightness he hasn’t felt since… ever.

“Being with you made me… feel confident and… wanted? I guess… no one’s ever made me feel that way before.” You admit. Sharing your own confessions. His eyes follow you every step around the room as you pace and speak. He’s surprised to have caused you anything but pain.

“I really liked you… even before all this started… even though I didn’t even really know you,” You sigh and chuckle softly at the thought. Knowing you fell in love with him when it felt like he wanted no one but you. And that might have been true but you were in love with the idea of him. The idea that someone like him would be in love with you.

“But I realized that the image of you that I have in my head is nowhere near who you really are. And I think you did the same for me.” You explain. He nods, knowing that’s exactly right. His first chapter with you is an unreliable memory.

“So I forgive you.” You nod. And he just looks up at you in awe. Like his heart will explode. He’s never felt this way before. Ever in his life. Is this what it feels like to be in love? To fall in love? Has he been falling all this time and now he’s completely fallen?

There’s a knock at the door. An interruption to this discussion but your words echo in his mind. And he never wants to forget them. “Okay, ready to get started? We’ll do this nice and quick and you guys can be on your way…” The doctor smiles, wheeling in a tray of materials and supplies. “Thank you” You smile and nod, moving over to make room for the doctor’s supplies; standing next to where Miguel is sitting to watch the process; mainly out of curiosity. You keep an eye on Miguel’s face. Seeing he’s still deep in thought. It’ll take more time to understand him, but tonight is a good first step.

You watch the doctor start the process, absorbing the information she’s explaining, the instructions for care and the longer term things. Follow up appointments and such. You make sure to listen because Miguel doesn’t seem like he can listen very well right now.

You watch his uninjured fingers still fidgeting with the hem of his pants. And for the second time you want to protect him. You want to make him feel… comfortable. You realize. That’s what he needs.

You reach across, taking his left hand in yours. Causing him to look up, squeezing gently as his fingers eagerly lace with yours. And it’s like all of a sudden he can feel the table under him, he can hear the doctor’s voice, he can feel the sleeve going on his arm, he can feel the pain in his hand. To get out of his head and come back into the real world around him. That’s what you’ve always done. You’re like an escape and you didn’t even know you were doing it. He didn’t even realize. Imagine how things could be if he just opened up. If he wasn’t afraid of how you’d react. If you’d put him down, chastise him for his feelings. Like he alway has been all his life.

“Miguel?” You hum, to get his attention after the doctor's attempts. The noise of his thoughts muting at the sound of your voice. “Hm?”

“What color do you want?” You ask softly, gesturing to the doctor holding out samples of the cast wrappings. Your thumb rubbing gently over the back of his knuckles. He can feel that too. “Oh uh… I don’t know.” He shakes his head slightly, feeling so overwhelmed in both good and bad ways. Overwhelmed with his feelings of love and fear. “You could get blue for the team colors…” You suggest with a soft smile, thinking of his soccer uniform, looking over the options that the doctor has laid out. Treating him with tender care, wanting to do it, no matter the things that have happened. It’s all in the past now. He smiles softly at your cute suggestion. “Yeah sure, blue is good…” He nods a slight smile at the doctor's kindness and patience. She nods and gets to work. Wrapping his cast up and letting it all set and harden. The blue material going from his fingers nearly up to his elbow.

“Alright, your 4 week appointment is all set, and you have the slip for the prescription. Come back if anything happens, or if you have any questions just call the non-emergency line.” The receptionist says. A kind smile on her face, looking up at the both of you, two kids tired out of their minds, hanging onto life and each other by a thread at this point. “Thank you very much.” Miguel nods with a smile. His injury now supported, already feeling less like it’s just hanging off his body.

You hand over the clipboard. Realizing you never decided on it. The relationship. Because it’s complicated. And you figured a blank line is better than a scribble of eraser marks.

“Have a good rest of the night… or morning I suppose.” She nods. Because yes, it is 4 a.m. at this point.

Leaving through the automatic sliding glass doors, stepping out into the very early morning. A soft glow of the imminent rising sun lighting up the sky. But it’s still very dark out. The birds haven’t even started to wake up and beckon the morning. He walks up beside you as you both head into the parking lot to get to your car. It’s still sprinkling slightly, some far away thunder rolling.

“How does it feel?” You ask, looking over and seeing the blue material on his arm peeking out from his sleeve. “Feels better than before… still hurts.” He sighs, taking a few longer strides and reaching the driver door first. Opening it for you. “Do you want me to drive?” He offers softly. “No, you only have one hand.” You quickly refuse.

“I can drive with one hand… and you’re tired.” He insists gently. “You’re tired too. And you have broken fingers.” You smirk, winning this, getting into the driver's seat. He huffs out a breath of laughter and relents, closing the door after you and walking to the passenger side.

“Take this…” You flail the prescription slip in front of him. His eyes blinking tiredly and he traps the piece of paper between his good fingers. Brow furrowing in focus and reading the information. It’s a bit blurry since he doesn’t have his contacts in. “Let’s go get that acetaprofin…” You sigh, turning the car on.

“Wait, what did I say?” You look at him, a smile tugging at your lips.

“Acetaprofin?” He asks with a smile. “You mean acetaminophen? Or ibuprofen. I think it says acetaminophen on the sheet.” He can’t help the giggles that erupt in his chest. Beyond exhausted, the both of you. “No! I said that! I said acetaminophen.” you giggle, looking over at him, watching him starting to lose it with laughter.

“Nooo you didn’t…” He teases, wiping his eyes from laughing. “You said acetaprofin which is like… some acetaminophen and ibuprofen hybrid.”

“No I didn’t. Gimme that!” You snatch the paper out of his hand and point to the drug name on the sheet. “A-ce-ta-min-o-phen.” You sound it out as he’s giggling, not even looking at the paper, he’s looking at you. “I know what it says. That’s not what you said.”

Your eyes light up watching him smile and laugh. “Maybe not.” You admit, smiling. You can’t help but laugh yourself. It’s not even that funny, you both know that. But you’re both so tired, everything is funny. “Well science boy, maybe you should do your thesis on acetaprofin…” You joke.

“Yeah, I’m sure Alchemax would love that. A thesis on combining two drugs that do pretty much the same thing…” He sighs, the both of you coming down from a laughing fit. Sitting in your running car, in the corner of the emergency room parking lot, in the middle of the city, at four in the morning.

“Hah…” He sighs. That laughter was much needed. For both of you. “Y’know… we don’t have to go get it now. We can just go back to school. I can get it myself another day.” He says. Knowing you’re both exhausted and feeling bad for keeping you awake for so long. Although he does enjoy spending time with you again. Feeling like he doesn’t have to put his shield up. It’s harder to do when you’re not having sex. When he’s just being purely himself. It’s a new feeling.

He feels a little strange. Not just because he’s running on fumes but because of what he told you. But you don’t seem to be treating him any differently. If anything, it’s just making him feel a little closer to you. He’s never felt something like that before. Like you could be… someone he confides in. The first person on his mind. That’s what’s happened for the last month and a half anyway.

“No way… we’re getting your damn acetaprofin if it’s the last damn thing I damn do.” You protest, putting the car in drive and pulling out of the parking lot. On a mission. A mission of pain relief.

“Picking up for O’Hara?” You say at the pharmacy desk, the old woman behind the register typing into the old computer to bring up the prescription. “Date of birth?” She asks, looking at the two of you over the edge of her glasses. Miguel steps forward to answer.

“08/13/2001.” You state before he can. A satisfied smile on your face for knowing his birthday now. Even if he didn’t tell you the day it was happening.

“It’s just been sent in… I’ll make it up for you.” The old woman says, her New York accent quite thick. And she moves around slowly to go make up his prescription acetaminophen and antibiotics. “Okay thank you.” Miguel smiles. The two of you having to wait some more this morning.

…

“Strawberry or Cherry?” You sigh, holding out two packs of twizzlers in front of him. The two of you migrating to the candy aisle and looking through the endless sweets. “Strawberry obviously.” He nods, pointing at the pack, keeping his cast wrapped arm close to his chest, a sign to you that the pain is in fact bothering him. “Obviously.” You nod. Totally agreeing.

“Ha. I had to give my brother the heimlich once with one of these.” You cringe and hold up a box of Lemonheads. “Oh no, really?” His eyes widen, meeting your eyes. What if that had been Gabriel?

“Yeah, and then my mom banned them from all the kids…” You giggle, putting it back on the shelf and looking at another candy item. He grins at the thought, imagining what your family must be like. After all the little things you’ve told him. Your parents and siblings. It’s like a different world he’s never stepped into before.

“This is Gabriel’s favorite…” He nods and points to a box of warhead hard candies on the shelf. “We used to have competitions” He smiles, looking at you. “Oh the ‘see who can hold it in their mouth the longest without spitting it out’ competition? I know it well…”

“Mhm.” He nods, enjoying feeling like he can be similar to you in some way. He does love Gabriel a lot and hearing the way you’ve always talked about your own family makes him feel good. Even if his own family doesn’t feel like much of a family at all.

…

“These lights are so bright.” You huff, crouching down and looking in the makeup aisle. Miguel leaning against one of the shelves and trying not to fall asleep standing up. “Which one… on my skin?” You sigh, grabbing two blush shades, standing up with whatever energy you have left. Holding them up to him. He blinks tiredly and takes the two small things from your hands, walking right up to you and holding them up to your cheeks. “What am I looking for?” He asks, holding each one on the sides of your cheeks. Your eyes closed.

“Just for… which one matches best for my undertooooones…” You drawl with eyes still closed, feeling the backs of his fingers on your cheeks. “Undertooooones…” He echos softly and teases. “Hmm…” He hums, looking back and forth and then just looking at your face. Your lashes, your lips. Feeling like he could just kiss you right now. It would be so easy to just peck your lips.

“So?” Your voice brings him out of his thoughts. “Uh I think this one… I don’t know. That one is pretty.” He sighs, ignoring the urge to kiss your lips. Knowing he probably shouldn’t. But he wants to. Your eyes flutter open, causing his heart to flutter at the sight. Your hands coming to grasp his wrists. The two products in his fingers. Looking down at the one he chose. “Yeah, I like that one.” You nod and he adds it to the small pile of candy and miscellaneous things you’ve both picked out around the store.

…

“Mm this one is good…” Miguel holds a bottle of shampoo over to you. Letting you smell it. “Coconut Milk and turmeric…” You mumble, reading the scent on the bottle before clasping your hands over his hands around the bottle and smelling. The rim of the bottle touches your nose, getting some soap on there. “Ah- yeah it smells good” You giggle, shampoo above your lip. “Oh no sorry…” He laughs, the two of you deliriously tired. His other hand comes up to wipe the soap off, rubbing over the ridge of your lip and getting it off. All while you’re both quietly giggling among the shampoo selections.

“Are we being too loud?” You giggle, whispering and looking up at him. There’s no one else in here it’s so late but still you’re both giggling endlessly in the aisles. “Probably…” He whispers, putting the shampoo back on the shelf. The two of you standing close, huddled next to the shelves and aimlessly looking around waiting for his prescription to be ready.

…

“I didn’t know they sell vibrators at the drug store…” You comment. Wandered into the aisle of sexual health and products. Staring up at the row of vibrators on the top shelf, kept in those plastic cages. Needing the employees' help to unlock it. “I guess… maybe people need it… for medical… things.” He sighs behind you. Like zombies, the two of you.

“What kind of medical things?” You raise a brow at him, turning around to face him. He takes a closer look at the boxes, lifting one toy and reading the back of it.

“Mm… neglected clit disease?” He jokes, looking up in your eyes. A smug look on his face and a smile spreading over yours. His eyes gleaming watching you laugh. “Stupid boyfriend syndrome?” He adds. “Yeah possibly…” You nod.

“Boyfriend with broken fingers disorder.” He smiles a goofy grin, holding up his cast and shrugging. His poor broken fingers. Boyfriend.

“Yeah you’re right… it’s on the rise…” You laugh softly and nod. He nods, reading the back of the box and turning to look at the other models on the shelf.

Your eyes scan over the side of his face as he turns. Wanting to reach out and run your hands through his hair like you’ve done so many times before. But it’s never been like this before. Just the two of you like this. Like friends. But there’s something extra obviously because you’ve seen each other naked more times than you can remember. But being away from him was like rehab from an addiction. An addiction to him, the feeling of him, the way he can make you feel.

You roll your eyes and smile. Turning to leave the aisle. He smiles that same grin. Watching you start walking, he looks down at the box in his hand. Piling the vibrator on the stack of items in his arm with a smirk on his face. Among the candy, makeup, shampoo and miscellaneous things you’ve both picked out, the sex toy like a cherry on top.

…

He smiles watching you huff and sit down on the floor. Right in the middle a different aisle. Paper and stationary on one side and birthday cards on the other. Tilting his head and looking down at you on the floor. Sharing your exhaustion. “How does it feel?” You ask and he walks over, sitting down in front of you, criss crossed and facing you. Setting the items down on the floor too.

“It hurts…” He admits, not feeling the need to lie about it. Not anymore. You nod and yawn. Looking over and seeing a pack of black sharpies. Leaning over to grab it.

“Can I write on it?” You smile and brighten up at the thought. “My cast?” He grins and watches you. Your excitement.

“Yeah a little message or a doodle” You pull open the pack of markers. Planning to just pay for them on the way out. “Fine, just no dicks, okay?” He teases and you feign disappointment at his request. He scoots closer to you as you hold out the sharpie for the blue material on his arm. “Hmm…” You think of what to write or draw for your masterpiece. Since he’ll have it on there for a few weeks you want to make it count.

He’s just smiling, watching your pretty face as you think of what to write, his arm draped over your lap and your fingers dancing over his upper arm to hold it in place, pen in hand.

You start shaking your head and he can tell you’ve thought of something. “What?” He grins. “No… nothing.” You smile, shaking your head. “Come on… do it. Whatever you thought of, just write it.”

“No I can’t.” You smile nervously, looking up in his eyes. “Yes you can.” He replies in the same tone. Gesturing to his cast. “Write it.”

“Close your eyes.” You demand and he does so. His eyes fluttering closed. A smile on his lips. You debate it for a second. The thing you thought of was originally sort of supposed to be a joke but it could also not be a joke at the same time. You don’t want to make things awkward or more complicated. Shaking your head, you decide to just do it. Maybe he’ll laugh. The felt tip scratches on the hardened blue material. He waits patiently with eyes closed until finally…

“Done.” You sigh, already feeling embarrassed. But it’s on there and it’s permanent. His eyes flutter open, searching the cast on his arm. Eyes scanning over the black cursive letters. Just one small word.

Mine.

His eyes lock on the word. Reading it over. Over and over then looking up at you. After all that’s happened, all he said, all that went on. You know and he does too, that you’re being very generous with your heart. As you’ve always been.

“I like it…” He hums softly, nodding and looking back down at the writing. After seeing that slight blush of embarrassment on your cheeks.

Is this all he’s ever wanted? To be yours. And for you to be the one to make it so? All the times he made you his, all the times he claimed you, took you, those times don’t compare to this one. This little word, written by your hand, from your mind, your heart. He won’t take it for granted.

“I should’ve just drawn a dick…” You shake your head and smile. The tension dissolving then. Meeting his eyes for a moment. Unable to hide the bit of embarrassment. You don’t want to repeat patterns of the past. But you also want to be honest about your feelings. “Fine, you can draw a dick.”

”Really??!”

“No!!” He laughs. “I was just kidding!”

“No, you said it so I can do it!”

“No no no, I take it back!” He refuses with a smile, shaking his head and laughing, his eyes locked on your smile. Again, he just wants to kiss you. To kiss you again after feeling like it’s been forever since he’s had the chance. “Come onnnnn…” You smile and he shakes his head, wanting to take your face into his hands and kiss your lips. It almost makes his heart sore, knowing that he really shouldn’t do it. And he’s trying to be careful. Holding so tightly onto this olive branch.

“Let’s go see if it’s ready now, yeah?” He suggests, needing to change the subject for his own sake. “Fine…” You whine, watching him rise, accepting his hand when he stretches it out to you to get up from the floor.

…

You both watch the old woman scan the items and the prescriptions. Rolling your eyes at Miguel’s smirk when she scans the vibrator, taking off the protected cage around the box. The woman having absolutely no reaction to the item. She just doesn’t care, not at this hour and probably not at any other hour either.

You look for some money to pay for the makeup and the things you picked out but before you can he puts his card in the machine, reaching his arm around your waist to press the numbers. His chest pressing to your back slightly. You watch the thick black card go into the machine. The numbers going in and the ding when it accepts easily. “Thank you, have a nice night.” The woman says, her voice low and gravelly but she’s been kind overall.

“Thank you.” Miguel nods and grabs the bag off the counter after taking his card back. “Thanks!” You smile and start walking, with him right beside you. “Where’s the receipt? I can give you some cash for my things…”

“Don’t worry about it.” He assures. Shaking his head and holding the bag of items in his good hand.

“If you say so…” You sigh, walking beside him as you both leave the drug store. “Thank you…”

The sun is just starting to light up the early morning sky now that it’s about 5 am. Birds starting to chirp. “I need to sleep.” You sigh, getting in the driver's seat. And Miguel in the passenger seat with the bag of things on his lap. “I can drive if you want…” He offers again with a yawn, stretching his back slightly, his head against the headrest. “No it’s fine, it’s only a few minutes…” You assure him, buckling up and starting the car to get back to the dorms.

You start driving, pulling out of the parking lot and turning through the city streets. There are a few cars out but nothing compared to the morning rush to start in a few hours. The city slowly starts to light up with the sun. It’s not even over the horizon yet, just lighting the sky with anticipatory sunshine. He’s stealing small glances at you as you drive. Feeling funny inside. He doesn’t know quite how to place this feeling. It doesn’t feel bad, he knows that much.

“So it says… take two of these… and one of these morning and night.” You read the prescription bottles for acetaminophen and antibiotics. Standing at the door of his dorm room, in the doorway and giving him the slip from the doctor to have. “Thank you.” He nods softly, genuinely. Although that one thank you doesn’t even cut it. He doesn’t think so.

“I can’t believe we literally stayed up all night doing that.” He sighs, walking into his dorm. Glancing back at you and trying to be subtle, wanting to see if you’ll follow him inside. Only wanting you to do it if you want to. You follow him in, replying in similar disbelief, not noticing his glancing and watchful eye. “I know, well we had to wait so long for everything.” You huff, sitting on the edge of his bed and grabbing the bag of things when he drops it next to you.

You grab the pack of twizzlers and watch him take the prescription bottles to swallow his pills. Eyes widening in realization when he takes a pair of round framed glasses out of a case on his desk. He puts them on, reading the small print on the bottle. And you try to suppress the biggest smile. He wears glasses? How did you not figure this out? Regardless, he’s adorable.

“Do you need any help?” You ask softly. Watching him trying to maneuver the lock top with one hand, eventually trying to hold it between his knees and undo it with his good hand. “No thanks, I got it.” He looks over at you, instantly doing a double take seeing the way you’re smiling at him. Or the way you’re obviously trying not to smile. What’s got you smiling all pretty like that?

“I like your frames…” You smile and comment, his cheeks instantly reddening when he realizes that’s why you’re smiling. Looking over at you like a deer caught in headlights and the top of the bottle finally pops off, he flinches trying to keep the pills from spilling all over the floor. “Oh, thanks.” He smiles bashfully, feeling a bit embarrassed but he can’t help stealing glances at your face when you're smiling like that.

You smile softly, feeling a bit sympathetic to him having to learn a whole new way of doing things. Only a little bit though since he is the one that punched his own locker in.

“Sorry if your sleep is fucked for the rest of the week…” He clears his throat, getting some water to swallow his pills. Turning for a second and trying to stop the hot blush on his cheeks. You’re the only person who’s ever made him blush like that. Just by looking at him. You watch him from the bed, biting and pulling the strawberry licorice candy, the only thing you’ve eaten all night. “It’s fine… it needed to be done.” You nod. Not feeling resentful or upset with him. It was your choice to show up after all.

“Well thank you” he smiles over at you, situating a few things before walking over to the bed, sitting next to you on the edge and grabbing a piece of candy for himself, biting a piece off and sighing, flopping back to lay down on top of the blankets. You do the same, mirroring his action, laying down on your back and biting your candy as well. The two of you just lying in silence and exhaustion.

“So… we can be friends right?” He suddenly asks, you look over to see he’s on his side facing you. You take a moment to think. Friends is better than what’s been going on for months. You roll over too to face him, biting your licorice and thinking. “Yeah… I think so.”

He smiles softly, nodding with relief.

“Just don’t lie to me again.” You say and his expression turns serious, understanding. “Just be honest with me and I’ll do the same. Tell me how you’re feeling. I’m not the kind of person to… judge you for your feelings, y’know?” You say like it’s some casual thing. Not seeing how it’s affecting him. But he could cry if he let himself. He feels like he’s dreaming.

I should tell you how I’m feeling. I should tell you that I’m in love with you. I love you. I love the way you speak to me. The way you make me feel. I love the way you care for me. The way you think of me even when I can’t think for myself. The sound of your voice, the feeling of your hair between my fingers. The memory of your heartbeat against my chest, your fingers on my back, your breath on my neck. The look in your eyes when you’re laughing; your smile. The tone of your voice when you sigh my name. I thought I wanted you to be mine. And that might have been true. But I wanted to be yours all the more.

But he doesn’t say any of that. He just nods and smiles softly, grabbing another piece of candy and stealing small glances your way. Laying beside one another as the early morning goes by, the exhaustion overtaking the both of you in time. Soon you’re both asleep. 5 am. 6 am. 7 am and into the morning. Catching up on the lost hours. But not regretting a single moment of this night. 8 am. 9 am. 10 am. 11 am. Noon. Morning classes are long passed and forgotten. Sleeping beside one another on top of his soft blankets. Not even the daylight through the window could wake you from this slumber.

To be continued...

Reblogs and comments very much appreciated!!

Taglist (hopefully I got everyone let me know if you want to be dropped/added):

@miguels-cock-piercings @queerponcho @club-danger-zone @bossva @softcrayon

@nommingonfood @bruhhvv

@jessies-unrelagated-thoughts @mauvecherie-writes @haveclayeveryday @kimivixen

@jadeloverxd @chiikasevennn @mvlanchqly @resident-cryptid

@x0tw0d57 @vampyboys @miguelspriscilla

@francesca-the-1st @migueloharasbbm @razertail18 @laysmt

@tojiragdoll @maiyart @wazawazooo @mun-2996 @marshhbs

@curious-randomlr @safixiovi @daddyfroglegs @theplaid-wearingmoose @reader-1290

@yeanika @elysiumsangel @rinnako @mangoslushcrush @twwcs

@izakopanyi2 @migueloharasoulmate @slut4oscarissac23

@miss-loomis @genny101

@aphinthestars @webshooterrr9 @m4dyy

@jdbxws @roserfz27 @ohara-whore @oharaslove @daisy-artfield

@mooreaey6yem @peachey-pie @migueloharacumslut @pxtched

@yougavemeyourheartyouknow @julia4today

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my-my-my · 6 months ago

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hiiii can i request a scenario for shinji hirako with an s/o who is usually not physically affectionate but really loves listening to his heartbeat when feeling stressed or overwhelmed?

Oh this is sweet! I think this would be my first Shinji fic. Thank you for requesting it. I'm going to put it with post-TYBW Shinji.

Summary: Work sucks most days, but getting yelled at for something that's not even your fault? That's even worse. Thankfully Shinji knows just what you need.

TW: This is SFW. Workplace abuse, verbal harassment, mentions of stress and incompetence.

“Are you that much of an idiot to not understand where vents should go!?” Yelled Captain Kurotsuchi at you. You flinched as he ranted on about your work in redesigning the Squad 12 barracks.

You and your team were leading the redesign and renovations of various barracks across the Gotei 13 after the war with the Quincies. And you had received the ire of Captain Kurotsuchi. You knew he would be difficult, which is why your superior assigned you as the leader of the small team working with Squad 12. You would be able to handle it. You were focused, diligent and attentive. Any details and requests, no matter how miniscule, would be overseen by you.

Which is why you were exhausted hearing Captain Kurotsuchi rant for umpteenth time today. You looked around apprehensively for Lieutenant Akon. It was much easier to deal with him than the captain, but he was nowhere in sight.

And your colleagues ran off to hide, even though it was their mistake to begin with putting the vent over his computer (and in what world did that make sense anyways!? You wanted to yell at them.)

But no, instead you were being yelled at as you tried your best to apologize for the error. Another colleague ran to remove the ventilation item, but it was too late.

It didn’t help that the rest of Squad 12 looked at you like some kind of idiot, being scolded by the teacher. You hated feeling so small.

So powerless.

You tried biting your lip, squeezing your fists as Captain Kurotsuchi waved you off, muttering how useless you were.

As he walked away, so did you, into another room to calm down. Your colleagues swarmed you, after scurrying away from Captain Kurotsuchi’s fury. It was humiliating, hearing their fake apologies.

“Leave me be, please.” You muttered to them, as they tried consoling you. You couldn’t register what they were saying, but one of them managed to find Lieutenant Akon.

But you were too exhausted and overwhelmed. You had spent over 14 hours doing renovations.

“I’m sorry for this Lieutenant Akon, but I’ll have to resume the renovations tomorrow.” You bowed your head apologetically. “My colleagues here will clean up.” You said, giving them a glare as they sheepishly agreed.

“Thank you for your work today.” Lieutenant Akon said, giving you a wry smile. “I got the gist of what happened. Don’t worry about today. You and your team have done an excellent job so far.” He smiled, “I’ll let the captain know tomorrow.”

“Thank you.” You sighed, bowing your head again.

“And I’ll be around tomorrow. So you can come to me with any questions.” The lieutenant explained, hoping that would make you feel better.

You gave him a soft smile, but left the barracks exhausted. You wanted to scream. You wanted to cry. Renovations were already hard work, and to have someone call you an idiot and every other related word at you, for more than 10 hours?

You didn’t realize, but you were shaking in fury.

“Hey, doll. What’s with the frown?” You knew that voice from anywhere.

And after the day you’ve had, it was a voice you needed to hear.

Without even thinking, you wrapped your arms around Captain Hirako. He immediately tensed at the sudden motion, but relaxed as he wrapped your arms back. Shinji frowned slightly, noticing the shakes your body was making.

“Why don’tcha come back to my office?” He held you closer, stroking your back. “I’ll play your favourite record and we can open those snacks we’ve been savin’ for, ok?” You nodded your head in his chest, as he held your hand, walking towards the Squad 5 barracks.

It wasn’t Shinji’s favourite genre of music, but it helped you relax. The two of you were lounging in the loveseat couch in his office, your body on top of his, laying peacefully as the music filled the room.

Your shaking stopped, thankfully. Shinji looked down as he stroked your hair. It wasn’t often you would want physical affection, so Shinji savoured the moments when they came.

He just hated how it would come to be. What sort of anger, frustration and ineptitudes you must have faced to lead you to this state. You had fallen asleep in his arms, as you cried into his chest about the awful day you had.

Shinji wanted to go down to the Squad 12 barracks and yell at Kurotsuchi on your behalf, but you would have been more upset. Instead, playing a record that soothed you, having your favourite snacks on hand, and of course his presence, was enough to calm you down.

It didn’t take long for you to fall asleep in his arms either. The lull of Shinji’s heartbeat, the warmth of his embrace, and his long, thin fingers, stroking your hair and body, put you in a daze. You murmured to him, with sleep lacing your voice, of what happened. Shinji would squeeze your arm in reassurance, hold you closer to him as he kissed your forehead.

Whatever had happened before, whatever will happen later, will never matter, you thought to yourself. Unconsciously you snuggled closer into Shinji’s chest.

The tenderness of Shinji’s love for you was enough to persevere – tomorrow will just be another day.

Thank you for requesting this, anon! I hope this is what you had in mind.

This is the song I was listening to, that would also play in the final scene. Home - Resonance

#bleach #shinji hirako #hirako shinji #shinji hirako x reader #shinji hirako x you #hirako bleach #bleach shinji #bleach x reader #bleach x you #a writes #answered #anonymous

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roseyodditea · 6 months ago

Text

A Day in the PubSec Office - Seth Lowell x gn!Reader

Summary -> 1.5k words. Exactly what the title says. Not quite teeth rotting fluff, but it's still cute Warnings -> None A/N -> To whoever asked I write about Seth, curse you for bringing this man to my attention. I just wanna pick him up and shake him now

Image taken from ZZZ wiki

Wake up, breakfast, transit, clock in, sit at your desk, and finally the workday begins. There was a bustle of phones, paperwork, patrols coming in and out, a janitor who lost the keys to the paper towel holder in the men’s bathroom, the squeak of that godforsaken wheel on your chair as you rolled backwards. Stretch, get coffee, rest your eyes, sit back down at your computer. Schedule meetings with investigators, make sure prison transfers happen when they need to, gather reports on hollows and civilian cases and-

“Good morning, (y/n)!” The enthusiastic man pops his head over your counter and smiles enough to show off those cute little fangs. “Good morning, officer Seth.” You look up from your computer screen and offer him one of the mints you kept at your desk. “You’re in early.”

“This is the same time I come in every morning. I just wanted to… switch up my schedule and come visit my favorite office worker.” He responds as he chews up the mint without really savoring the flavor.

You glance over at the tab that contains the schedules to the meeting rooms, scanning over the timetable until you land on something of interest. “Couldn’t get into the debriefing about the robbery on Sixth Street?” You tease and watch as his ears flatten and twitch. “Shut up…” He grumbles and watches as you straighten up a stack of civilian complaints. He stares intently, his pupils widening like he had just locked onto a target. It was cute, watching how much he wanted to help. “What are those?” He tries not to sound overly excited about the prospect of having something to do this early in the morning.

“Just some complaints about a group of bangboos causing a ruckus in the alleyway. From what was called in it just sounds like a turf war between some alley cats and curious bangboos.” “I can go talk to them.” Seth offers a little too quickly.

“The cats?” You tease just to see that little ear twitch again.

“The bangboos.” He scoffs and snatches one of the files from your hands quickly. “Leave it to your favorite officer!” You cross your arms playfully. “Who says you’re my favorite?”

“The phone you’re ignoring.” Seth teases back and leaves with a swish of his tail as you regrettably pick up the phone.

“Lumina Square PubSec non emergency line, how can I help you?” You recite the script and listen to another complaint about a fat alley cat and a bangboo. “Yes, I just sent my best officer to take care of it.”

*********************

The day bustled on further, a tornado of paperwork being dropped by a secretary, cancel a meeting and move and organize another one with a different precinct, someone please find that damn key so you can stop noticing wet spots on the male officers pants, call the mechanic to come tow a patrol vehicle, figure out who unplugged Officer Cui’s charging station, settle a stupid dispute between two officers who both equally suck at paperwork, refill the coffee machine. Some days you wished there were two of you… or you could curse out the people who frustrated you. You rifle through a filing cabinet, looking for one file that was several years old because Zhu Yuan found a lead on a cold case. You grumble to yourself, repeating the name of the criminal as you open up the second drawer. You finally grab the file and start to go back to your desk where your lunch was surely gathering dust.

Your path was interrupted by two officers calling your name as they handed you a stack of paperwork to file. You let out a groan and file it all away, only to realize you filed away the thing Zhu Yuan needed. A headache was starting to blossom in your head as you lean your forehead against the cold metal of the filing cabinet. You close your eyes and take a few deep breaths. Remember, you work in PubSec, you can’t get away with slapping the next person who pisses you off.

“(Y/n)?”

“What?” You whip your head around harshly before you register who said your name. You clear your throat and awkwardly fidget with your name badge. “Ah, sorry Officer Seth. How can I help you?”

Seth didn’t seem to take your words as hurtful, and instead continued on. “I have something that I really need your help with. Zhu Yuan said it overrules anything else you could be working on right now.”

You let out a deep sigh and drag a hand across your face. “Alright. Hit me.” “Hit you?” “...Yeah. What do you need help with?” “Oh sorry I thought you actually wanted me to hit you.” He responded awkwardly.

“Why would I want that?” His tail twitched. “I don’t know. You speak very deadpan when you’re frustrated and I can’t tell if you’re joking.” “Why would I not be joking!?” You ask, giggling a bit.

“You talk about walking into oncoming traffic all the time. I don't think I’m at fault here.” He continues, glad his plan to get you to smile worked without you realizing what he was doing.

You let out a sigh and roll your eyes with a shake of your head. “Alright, what do you need Seth?”

“Follow me.” He turns to walk down a hall to a small meeting room. You think back to all the schedules and realize this room was supposed to be empty. Whoever booked it didn’t follow the proper procedures and might have thrown off your whole organization system. You actually stay in the office, all these boneheads who go out to patrol and cases are supposed to tell you when things in the office change and- “What’s all this?”

Seth moves to sit at one side of the table where your favorite drinks from the convenience store and favorite ramen from General Chop’s sit. “Lunch,” he looks up at you with those big, eager eyes. “It’s so hard to get you out for lunch so I thought I’d come up with a compromise so you’re not eating your sad little sandwich at your desk.” “There is nothing wrong with my sandwiches!” You laugh as you sit across from him, eating a few bites and looking down into the ramen as you both ate. You were often taken advantage of, seen as nothing but a secretary, but this was incredibly sweet of Seth. “Thank you.” “Oh you do so much for us it’s the least I can do. This precinct would fall apart without you.” He states like it was the most obvious thing in the world, a sharp contrast to the pile of officers who never even bothered to remember your name.

*********************

Last leg of the day, you’ve got this.

More phone calls coming in, another patrol switch, more meetings, finally finding the key that was on the janitors key ring, Officer Cui somehow having more charging issues, a couple night shift officers calling in sick, Zhu Yuan asking about the file you had forgotten to get after lunch, Qingyi starting a betting pool that you had to smooth over before upper management started, someone losing a patrol vehicle only for it to have been in a different parking lot, a vandalism case wrapping up with the inside of the office now being covered in spray glitter and an entire can of decorative spiders webs and more and more and more.

It was long after you were supposed to go home when you finally dumped the old coffee pot and put on a fresh brew for night shift. You slipped on your coat, clocked out, and got halfway through the lobby before your name was called again.

“(Y/n), want someone to walk you home? That bag snatcher wasn’t caught today and they might still be out there.” Seth said as he quickly fell into step with you.

You thought back to that damned filing cabinet again and realized that the petty thief had been caught… by Seth… You looked at the man in front of you and just let out a sigh, a smile cracking across your lips. “I’d feel a lot safer with you by my side.”

The walk to your apartment was rather uneventful, Seth asking about your day and listening intently to your every complaint before he tried to transition to lighthearted conversations to cheer you up. You stepped up to your front door and let out a tired sigh, thankful to be home. “Well, this is me.” Seth glances around before realizing he’d have to say goodbye now. “I’m glad I got you home all safe and sound.” “Is there anything you can’t do?” You laugh and turn to him to see that gentle smile still beaming at you.

“Not that I’ve found yet.” He boasts and puffs up a bit, happily.

You step close and place a kiss on his cheek, pulling away to see the blank look on his face, the way his tail had puffed up to look like a bottle brush. “Goodnight, Seth.” “Ah… Goodnight. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He murmurs and starts to try to walk away before you giggle. “Tomorrow is Saturday. We’re both off on Saturdays.” “...See you anyway?”

#oneshot #zzz x reader #seth lowell x reader #seth x reader #seth lowell

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raven-cincaide · 8 months ago

Text

Post Canon! Yuuji wants to be a university student. He says that after all the war and loss he needs to catch up on rest and just be human- like the rest of them. He blames Nobara’s insatiable nagging about ‘finally being around people with taste’ and excuses it by saying that Megumi needs to find someone to love- whether the brooding guy wants it or not. However, in truth he misses the carefree school life. And he knows they all need a break from curses. So, after a lot of nagging from his side, the trio sent in their uni applications minutes before the deadline.

Post Canon! Yuuji is dead set on living his best life in the coming three years. To study “something” while attending every book and nerd club with Megumi, every frat party and adventure with Nobara, and hell, maybe show off some of his god-given sports skills he shunned in high school. After all, girls still dug that sort of thing even at uni- the entire ‘jocks’ and ‘athletes’ persona, right?!

Post Canon! Yuuji is determined to experience everything being a ‘normal guy’ could get him. He intends to make new friends, be social, live life and get laid as much as possible. Be single and date until he is sick of romance. But most importantly, he wants these three years to be about him, his wants, his needs, and to be a bit goddamn selfish for once.

At least, that is the plan he declares to his friends as they step onto campus, Nobara and Megumi rolling their eyes at him before heading to get their schedules. While Post Canon! Yuuji headed straight to the housing office because he’d rather be Sukuna’s vessel again than drive two hours daily from campus to the Jujutsu dorms.

Post Canon! Yuuji sees you, the administrative assistant so far from his usual type, and instantly knows his plans go straight out the window. He shuffles closer to you and the large desk you’re seated at, mouth dry and hands shaking like a teenager as he places his papers and ID on the table before you. He greets you with a shaky smile he hopes doesn’t look like a grimace. “H-Hi! I’m here for house- housing!” God, he sounds like such a noob.

Post Canon! Yuuji can’t help the genuine grin that splits his face as you flash him a look that so clearly reads ‘obviousely’ before typing away at the computer. The way you act instantly reminds him of Megumi and Nobara, and he feels more at ease around you.

Then, addressing him like an idiot feels familiar and almost like coming home: “Here is your copy of the contract and the key. You’re in the main dorms, in a single room on the second floor. recycling at the entrance, and the kitchen at the end of the same hall.” You explain, pointing out the location of his room on a map and then the location of the kitchen as if he was so helpless he wouldn’t be able to find it without your guidance.

“Anything else?” You ask yet it sounds more like a common phrase you utter, expecting a ‘no’ and turning back to your computer to prepare for the next poor sod with a task a glorified monkey could do

But Post Canon! Yuuji isn’t ready to let you go. He wants more of your attention, so he says the first thing on his mind; ”Aww, man, a dorm room? Are you sure? I-I mean, I’m certain I booked a flat!-” Yuji rushes to put on his biggest puppy dog eyes- the kind Nobara says makes him look like a wet dog- “Can you check again? Please? Me and my friends are not from around here, and If I’ve fucked up on housing- man they’ll kill me–” Yuuji rushes out a full-on water-works story, he’s even impressed with himself, maybe he should take up theatre.

Or not, but hey at least it keeps your attention on him.

Post Canon! Yuuji drinks in you and studies every feature of you. From the dark daggers you glare at him, then to the way your eyes grow mild with pity, to how you bite your lips in thought until he’s sure he’ll recognise you anywhere, just by your looks or voice alone.

“I’m sorry, you booked a dorm room, and no flats are available at the moment” you put on that fake work-voice that instantly makes Yuuji’s face fall. He likes your real voice- mean tone and all- a lot better.

Post Canon! Yuuji looks like a kicked puppy as he slowly gathers his stuff from your desk. He barely registers the look of surprise on your face, as if you expected him to talk back to you or pester you instead of politely accepting your words the way he does. But he notes how your expression shifts into hesitation and finally determination.

Post Canon! Yuuji is about to leave when you clear your throat to get his attention. Then, you lean over the desk separating, you two. “You know..” your voice is quiet, clearly not wanting the gathering students in the lobby to hear you, “Not all the apartment keys are gathered yet so there could still come in a cancellation in the next few days... you’re welcome by to check-”

Post Canon! Yuuji grins widely- the widest he has grinned in many years. “I’ll be here tomorrow!” he declares before being forced to leave your small office as your boss draws your attention away. But Yuuji swears to himself he will be there tomorrow, the day after, and the next day after. As long as it means he can talk to you, if only for a little bit.

But first,Post Canon! Yuuji needs to figure out what to do if he actually gets a flat through you. Could he bribe Nobara and Megumi to share the costs with him? Maybe post a ‘room for rent’ ad?

Ohh, well, Post Canon! Yuuji decides, with a skip in his step, he’ll cross that bridge when he gets there. After all, he reasons, you have to do some insane things for love, right?!

Author note: Thank you so so much, @ravester, for asking for a Yuuji-centric post canon hcs I hope this meets your expectations <3

And for the rest of the wonderful readers, what do you think? We have a Megumi one and a Yuuji one, do we need a Nobara one as well?

Main |Raven | Rules and Requests | Masterlist | Cred & Other

All fics are unique works by ©ravencincaide 2024. Do not copy/repost/translate or spread my work(s) without my explicit permission. If you see any of my work(s) reworked/reposted/copied anywhere, please inform me!

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fairyysoup · 9 months ago

Text

the devil i know

chapter eight: back in hell at least it's comfortable

(repost)

fic tag | fic playlist | fic masterlist

pairing(s): crossroads demon!eddie munson x fem!reader

summary: Rabbit Season Duck Season ft. your demon boyfriend who doesn't want you to google him.

cw: explicit, smut, monsterfucking (no monstery stuff comes up but he is still a demon), blowjob, ball play, facial, making a deal with a demon (eddie's version), lover's spat but in the most hilarious way don't worry, sacrificial computer killed by fire, death mention, trauma, bullying mention, inspired by american and european folklore, sacrilegious themes, horror, witch!reader, reader is 21+ in modern day, eddie is immortal, sex pact, marking, possessive behavior, animal death, trauma, reader is ostracized by her very religious hometown, dark comedy, dead dove: do not eat

please check masterlist and individual parts for content warnings before reading. this fic contains dark themes. your media consumption is your own responsibility.

ALL OF MY WORKS ARE 18+ MINORS DNI

So. You’ve been at war with Eddie for two days now.

It started as a joke. You got curious– you didn’t really mean anything by it. Maybe you knew you were poking a hornet's nest, but you don’t recall him giving you any specific instructions not to. And what were the odds that this demon, in his wisdom, gave you his real, full name in a moment of crisis? What were the odds that you would actually find something about him?

You googled the name Eddie Munson.

At first, you did it on your phone, in bed, and your google search was limited to your IP address location. You got a ping for an Eddie Munson from one town over, who apparently bombed a car or something a few years back. The articles were bleak and didn’t include a lot of information. But otherwise, nothing from around Eastwick.

Then you widened your search parameters. Demons are supernatural, paranormal beings, right? Eddie said he used to be human, so you figured you should treat it like trying to find a ghost. And you didn’t know how old Eddie was– he could have lived at any point, from the last 60 years to the last 6,000 years. Although, for some reason you had a hard time picturing him living in 4,000 BCE.

You searched Eddie Munson folklore.

What are you doing?

You jumped at the sound of Eddie’s voice in your ear, locking your phone and throwing it across the bed. “Uhhh, nothing?”

Riiiight.

“What’re you– did I call you again?”

Yeah. You do it a lot, you know.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to.”

Mm. Go to sleep, sweetheart.

And you heard nothing about it. Until the next morning, when you unlocked your phone again and saw Eddie Munson folklore had brought up a few strange results.

Eddie Munson Serial Killer

Eddie Munson Satanic Panic

Eddie Munson Cult of Hawkins

You stared at the different search results with your morning coffee poised in the air, completely halted in place. You weighed your options, wondering what on earth you were going to find, should you click on any of them.

Was it really him? Was this even worth the effort and the possible janky links to a Subreddit you didn’t need to be scouring through?

You clicked on Eddie Munson Serial Killer, just to see what would come up, if there was a Wikipedia article with the guy’s face that you could honestly identify as Not Your Eddie.

And your phone died.

You scowled, and set down your coffee so that you could try turning it on again, but all you got was a dim low battery notification. Down by your knees, Dante whined and bumped his nose against your leg to get you to pay attention to him.

“Sorry, baby,” you cooed, shoving your phone onto a charger and forgetting about it. You stooped to scratch Dante behind the ears, and kissed him on his little hellhound head. “Let’s get you some food, yeah?”

You didn’t try again until much later, when you sat down with your computer in your living room. Now it was a little bit more serious, less of a joke. Even if this ‘Eddie Munson Serial Killer’ wasn’t your Eddie Munson, you’d never heard of the guy before. And you genuinely thought you were pretty checked out on various serial killers throughout history, with your penchant for true crime podcasts.

You picked at your nails for a moment, your hands hovering over the keyboard as you weighed your options. Then, you typed the words quickly into the search bar, and hit enter.

And your fucking computer glitched, blue screened, and died.

You stared at the black screen in front of you with a feeling of exasperation that bordered on irritation. You looked up, and made eye contact with Dante, laying on your floor in a patch of sunlight. The Rottweiler gazed back at you with eyes that glowed a little bit red in the sunlight, almost knowingly.

“Eddie, what the fuck is this about?” you asked the empty air.

No answer.

“Eddie?”

Radio silence. Dante yawned and rolled onto his side. The clock in the kitchen ticked on ominously. You waited for something– Eddie’s voice in your ear, or a footstep behind you, alerting you of his presence. Nothing came.

You stared into thin air, thinking over your options. You figured you could just be looking too deeply into things. You reached forward, and tried to turn your computer back on.

The screen popped once, like there was a power surge, and then the keyboard started smoking.

“Eddie!” you screeched, flinging the computer away from your lap. Flames burst from it just as it hit the floor. Dante leapt up and barked excitedly at it. “What kind of Looney Tunes bullshit–”

The burning computer’s screen blinked on, and from behind the crackling flames, a video started playing. Off-key, jazzy fanfare blasted from the burning speakers, sounding a bit screechy and tinny, and then Porky Pig appeared from within a red circle.

“That’s all, folks!”

“Oh, I see.” You chuckled, slowly nodding in indignation. “This is war, you little shit.”

So, that brings you here. The Eastwick Public Library is a tiny, one story unit in the town plaza’s main strip mall. Situated at the end of the building, it boasts a row of about fifteen bookshelves, half of which house the ‘religion’ genre, and maybe six computers. Seven, if you count the one behind the librarian’s desk.

You keep your head down as you log into one of the public access computers. It’s been ages since you set foot in the library, and you highly doubt any of your beloved neighbors would like to see you in here, looking up obscure serial killers. You can almost imagine their lack of surprise.

You type in your keyword search for a third time, and wait for the computer to spontaneously combust. It doesn’t. Instead, a few images pop up, followed by a Wikipedia article, followed by a few newspaper links.

It’s him. It’s your Eddie.

“Edward ‘Eddie’ Munson was an alleged American serial killer. He is the only known suspect of the Cunningham-Benson-Mckinney murders of Hawkins, Indiana in the Spring of 1986, and was presumed dead after the fatal 1986 Indiana Earthquake.”

The first image that shows up is obviously a yearbook photo– the typical blue background, a close up headshot of the grin that you know and love. The second photo is in black and white, a missing persons poster. And the third photo is yet another yearbook photo, but this time it’s a group shot. A bunch of teenage boys all lined up against a brick wall, under a banner that says Hellfire Club.

“No way,” you mutter incredulously, clicking on the photo and zooming in to find Eddie in the corner, sticking out his tongue and using his fingers to create a pair of devil horns over his head.

The link for the photo is for a yearbook pdf from Hawkins. The title of it reads HAWKINS HIGH DUNGEONS AND DRAGONS HELLFIRE CLUB, 1985-86.

You press your lips together, feeling yourself gearing up to grin. Quietly, and with the most affectionate tone of voice you have ever used in your life, you croon, “You were in a D&D club?”

One by one, each computer along the row you sit at pops and fizzles with sparks before shorting out. You pull your hands away, giggling and watching the sparks come down the line until they reach your computer, and then it goes dead.

And so does the rest of the power in the building.

You let out a blast of laughter, clapping your hands over your mouth while a group of teenage girls in the back corner scream bloody murder. The library has gone dark, and the cranky librarian at the front desk is simultaneously shushing the screaming girls and herding them out the door. You’re still giggling when you get up, and you have to hide the smile on your face when you duck past the librarian on your way out.

“Don’t.” Eddie materializes in your entryway when you get back home. Melting out of the woodwork, a shadow that forms into his pouting visage. He shakes his head at the floor, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Please don’t say anything, I’ll–”

“What?” you ask him, tilting your head. You bite your lip to stop yourself from giggling again; it had been so hard to stop your fit on the way home. He looks sheepishly away from you, a bright pink blush coloring his cheeks. “You’ll what, Eddie?”

He tries to look severe, but he can’t hide the smile beginning to wobble its way onto his lips. “I’ll Looney your Tunes so fucking hard–”

“You can’t Looney my Tunes motherfucker, I’ll Looney your Tunes.” You point an accusatory finger at him. “You owe me a goddamn computer!”

You’re not actually that mad about the computer, it was a piece of shit anyways. But Eddie surprises you by producing a new one from behind his back, and holds it out to you.

You give a placated hum as you take it from him. “So. That was you, huh?”

“No, it’s not– not technically–”

“Did you think I was gonna… gonna judge you, or something?”

Eddie doesn’t say anything in response, his eyes flicking from yours, to the computer in your hands, and back.

“You’re a demon. I made a deal with you, I sold my soul.” You screw up your face. “You’ve offered to kill someone for me like… what, three times now?”

Eddie sucks on his teeth and looks away.

“I think I’m past the point of judgment, honey.”

“It’s not that simple.” His brow furrows, and he chews on his bottom lip, stripping chapped skin from it with his teeth. “Believe me, I wouldn’t– I wouldn’t care, except that shit… the shit you read, that’s not the truth. I swear.”

“Then what is the truth?” You ask him mildly. “Were you a serial killer?”

“No.”

“But you were in a D&D club.”

He heaves a sigh, rocking back on his heels and tilting his head up towards the ceiling. You stare at him for a moment, watching him squirm a little bit like he’s looking for a way out of the conversation. Then, he grumbles, “Yeah…”

“You are so fucking cute.” Eddie’s cheeks turn bright red, and he spins away like he’s going to walk back through your bedroom door and disappear. You leap forward and grab his arm, giggling, “Nonono, don’t go. Come back here. So you’re a nerd, it’s okay. I’m a nerd. We’re nerds of a feather.”

“Sure.” Eddie snorts loudly, pulling you into a hug. His smoke surrounds you, as comforting and warm as his embrace. He buries his face in your hair, nuzzling against the side of your head. “M’gonna give you the truth, okay? The whole truth. And you have to promise not to run away.”

“Okay, Eddie.” You sigh and close your eyes as he lifts his hand and cups the side of your face. You lean into his touch. “I’m not running. I promise.”

HAWKINS, 1984

There are a few things Eddie Munson hates in this world. He has an abundance of annoyances, yes, but only a few things that he despises more than anything else. One of them is bullies- no matter where they come from. School, law enforcement, employers, whatever. It’s something he can’t deal with, and oftentimes out of his own propensity for self preservation, he spends his time avoiding them. He’s never been a fighter. He’s never been tough enough to defend himself, but running away is usually just as effective.

The second thing that he hates is loneliness. He likes to tell himself that, had he known that living in Hawkins would make him lonelier than anything, he’d have chosen to go live in Indianapolis with his Great Aunt Shirley instead of Uncle Wayne. But that’s not true at all– he loves Wayne, whenever he crosses paths with him.

But he’s being held back. Senior year of high school, and he’s not fucking graduating, and he doesn’t know if he can stand another year of bullshit from the assholes in town who can’t fucking stand him.

“You’re the only student we have who isn’t attending graduation this year,” Principal Higgins had told him, with his nose endearingly turned up in disdain. “You should feel lucky that we even offered to allow you to repeat the grade, considering your… track record.”

And so, thanks to his own irresponsibility and bad habits, he’ll be subjected to more loneliness. More bullying. More of the things he hates.

Unless.

Eddie’s done stupider things. His copper item is a… fucking moscow mule cup. Old and tarnished, but properly made of copper. He’ll get a new one for Wayne at some point, but he hasn’t seen his Uncle touch it in all the years that he’s lived with him. Eddie dirties his hands as he buries it in the wet earth, where the creek that runs through the woods behind Forest Hills trailer park splits in two. Eventually they converge again, somewhere down by Lover’s Lake, but here they create a fork.

He didn’t bother casting a circle. He doesn’t even know how the fuck that’s supposed to work.

His shoes are wet. He stands in ankle deep water, and he splashes around uncomfortably. “Hey, uh. I don’t know what I’m doing, but um. I’m– I’m here to make a deal. I guess.”

“Who’s the genius who uses a river as a crossroads?” says a woman’s voice, startling Eddie out of his wits.

Eddie jumps and loses his balance turning around in place, toppling down in the water. He looks around, hoping that he isn’t hearing things at the ripe old age of 18.

“Over here,” the voice says again, and Eddie catches a glimpse of movement from the corner of his eye. When he follows it, he finds a lady waving at him, crouched down beside a tree on the outer bank of the creek. Her dark hair hangs in her face, but she has a vaguely golden aura about her that makes her stand out in the night.

When she gets a good look at him, her sarcastic smile turns into a laugh. “Well, what do you know? It’s Jim Morrison.”

Eddie frowns. “I’m not Jim Morrison.”

“Obviously,” she says blandly. “Could’a fooled me, though.” She pauses, and then looks at him curiously. “What are you doing down there?”

Eddie glances down, at where he sits up to his waist in the water. He throws his hands up in defeat. “My delicates.”

She laughs and raises an eyebrow. “Aren’t you cold?”

“Yes.” He struggles up, dripping water all the way. “Y’know this is a sacred river? It was the birthplace of a love goddess or something.” He looks over at her again, and motions generally at her. “I can see the myth was true.”

The lady giggles, standing up from her crouched position. She wears a long green skirt that brushes the ground when she walks, and a crocheted shawl over some kind of halter top-looking doohickey. He tilts his head, being reminded of an old record that migrated to the back of his collection. Woodstock, ‘69. Grace Slick of Jefferson Airplane.

Grace Slick– or, at least, the demon who looks an awful lot like her, considering Grace Slick is definitely still alive– grins wickedly. “Oh, a charmer. Are you flirting with me?”

Eddie cracks a smile. “Can’t blame a guy for trying.”

The lady hums, standing directly across the water from him. “You wanted to make a deal. I’m here to make it with you, so if you don’t mind. What is it that you want?”

“How about being the greatest guitarist who ever lived?” Eddie gestures vaguely around at his general being. Ankle deep in water, soggy and probably looking very pathetic. “I figure maybe it’ll make things easier in the meantime. What does school matter to a rockstar, y’know? Maybe it’ll help me get the fuck out of town, for starters.”

The lady tilts her head. “And you’re not Jim Morrison, huh?”

“Was Jim Morrison a guitarist?” He rocks on his feet, nearly losing his balance again as he splashes around a bit. He plods awkwardly across the water, shoes squelching and pocket chains jingling. “What do I have to do, huh? Beg on my hands and knees? I’m already out here, soaking wet, in the middle of the night–”

“You’ll be a guitarist,” the lady tells him, her voice a bit sterner now. She regards him closely, her dark eyes narrowed at him. “The greatest who ever was and ever will be. I can see why your petition came to me.”

“My… what?”

“Your request for a demon to make a deal with. It came to me, because I favor musicians and performers.” Shortly, she produces a small, spiraled notepad that has a bunch of messily scrawled words on it. “I’ll give you your greatness. In return, you give me blood each full moon. A few drops on a tissue will do. Burn it in a dish on your window sill.”

“Is that normal?” Eddie asks, “Y’know, considering you’re also getting my soul, and everything.”

“It’s what I ask of you for veneration. Each demon asks for something different. I just find it easier than asking for a sex rite.”

“Excuse me?”

“After you die, you’ll become one of us,” she continues. “A demon of the crossroads. I don’t keep your soul. But I get power for securing it.” She snatches his arm, as he reaches towards her notebook. “Is that a yes?”

Eddie blinks, flushing pink from the cold and the woman’s grip, burning his skin. Her hand is unbearably hot, almost enough for him to jerk away. “Yes.”

The woman smiles with unnervingly sharp, pointed teeth. “Good.”

It takes a second for the pain to register; when it does, the notebook in the demon’s hand is already splashed with Eddie’s blood. He gives a pained whimper as he recognizes the pain of the wound on his arm, and begins hyperventilating the longer it grows, reaching up his arm, slicing into his muscle. His body tenses up and starts to shake, her grip on his arm disturbingly strong.

When she lets go, he curses and glances down to find a new mark on his arm. A black inked tattoo of a swarm of bats.

“So… you fought the forces of evil by playing Metallica?”

“Well, it made sense at the time.”

Teeth dug into the plush skin of your bottom lip, you suppress another giggle as you sweep your fingers through Eddie’s hair, pushing his bangs back away from his face and letting them stick up into the air as you release them. He has a tiny scar on his forehead, just shy of his hairline, which you never noticed before now. You want to kiss it.

Instead, you trace it with your fingers. Eddie’s chin rests on your stomach, his eyes dark and wanting as they gaze up at your face. He has the prettiest eyelashes you think you’ve ever seen, and he bats them at you like he means to use them for your demise.

He lays between your legs on the couch. You’d moved there naturally, with his hands coaxing you and yours pulling him like a life raft. It isn’t easy, having the contents of someone’s life– two years’ worth of it– dumped into your head all at once. When he said he was going to give you the truth, he quite literally gave it to you. Directly. Into your brain.

He gave you everything, from the time that he made his deal, all the way up to his death. You saw him forming the Hellfire Club only a few months after the deal was initially made, and watched as it evolved into a gaggle of friends that he cared for and loved. And you saw the way that he protected them until the very end, when he played the greatest rock concert ever given.

“You were so sweet, baby,” you whisper, with a tightness in your throat that tries to constrict the flow of air from getting out.

“Wonder what happened.” You bop him on the shoulder with your palm and watch his lips quirk up into a smirk. “Hey, I mean. You don’t sit through torture seminars in Hell without getting a little bit screwy on your way out.”

“They have seminars there?”

“Are you kidding?” Eddie snorts, his eyes lighting up briefly with a little bit of fire. “There’s a whole circle of Hell that’s just one big long TimeShares seminar. I’ve been to it. Probably the most horrible thing I had to experience before I could go off and start making deals. They use it as training.”

“That’s fucked up.”

“It is fucked up. It’s Hell, and I’m a salesman. Arthur Miller should have written something about that.”

“So… does God exist?”

“Oh, sure. Lots of gods. My favorite one is Hades. Cool guy. He runs Hell– the Underworld. Same thing. Persephone is kind of intimidating, though. Don’t get on her bad side.” Eddie tilts his head at you. “Pretty much any mythological figure you can think of exists on some plane of the Otherworld. Think of… gods and angels as my coworkers, in different departments. Maybe I don’t like all of them, but I work with them.”

“The Otherworld is a department store?”

“Precisely.”

Your fingers fumble with the collar of his shirt and hook around the metal chain he wears around his neck. “Can I ask you a serious question?”

His eyes bore into yours. “Anything you want.”

“How many, um–” Your eyes flutter when he shifts, and your fingers dip beneath the collar of his shirt just enough to feel the burn of his skin there– “how many deals have you made?”

“Including you,” he says, heaving a sigh that you can feel expand in his chest, “three. There was Charlotte, in ‘91, and then Adrian, in ‘99. Neither of them held up their end of the deal.”

“The… the full moon?” You can’t imagine how it could be that much of a sacrifice, being required to sleep with him once a month. You’re so pent up, so eager to do it already that the notion that someone wouldn’t seems absurd to you.

Eddie nods. “You don’t hold up your end of the deal… the contract is up. And then Hell comes to collect.”

You let that information hang in the air between you. You stare at it, the empty space over his head, as you try to process it in the silence that follows. “Quick way to an early grave?”

“Happened to me,” he mutters. “Forgot to prick my finger and rub it on a napkin during all that mess, fighting for my life. If you can believe it.”

There’s an unspoken air of heaviness in the room– the knowledge that he died far too young, protecting his friends with the talent he sold his soul to have. Far too quickly to make selling his soul even worth it in the long run. It weighs on you, pressing down on your lungs at the same time as Eddie’s weight presses in between your hips.

Your own rite looms over you, just a few days away. Something in your gut tells you that Eddie is giving you this– the honest truth– so you know what you’re in for. You promised him you wouldn’t run away.

You sold your soul and promised that you’d meet his demands if he met yours; you never expected that it would get to this point. That you’d be lying here, with him curled between your legs, and you’d have to accept that the attraction you feel towards him isn’t just due to the terms of the deal anymore.

You know him, now. Or, at least, you know him a fair bit better than you did.

You tilt your head, realizing something out of the blue. “You didn’t have to make my deal include the sex.”

“I never claimed to not be a pervert, sweetheart.” He flashes you a sharp grin. “I am your average horny little devil, you know.”

“And you didn’t have to mark me with your name,” you point out, with a note of curiosity in your voice. “Your demon didn’t.”

Eddie chuckles. “Yeah, but that’s ‘cause I’m disgustingly obsessed with you and need you to be all mine, so.”

Your heart flutters at that, singing along to the tune of some stupid love song you haven’t heard in a long time. You hum, holding Eddie’s face in your hands. His eyes flick down to your lips, and then back up to meet your gaze.

“I still think you’re sweet,” you tell him earnestly.

“You think I’m sweet?” He parrots, his hand sliding up the curve of your thigh and over your hip, his fingers curling into the hem of your shirt. He looks incredulous, like he doesn’t really believe you.

“I mean, sweet like a feral dog I have on a leash who’s out for everyone’s blood except mine. Y’know.”

He grins wickedly, a deadly twinkle in his eye as he shifts further down, his head lowering toward where your shirt bunches up around your waist, exposing a sliver of your stomach. You shudder as his hot breath hits your skin. “Is this sweet?”

Eddie presses a lingering kiss onto the soft skin just above your navel. You sigh, your fingers sliding through his hair and gripping at the roots, and he pauses. His breath hitches in his throat at the feeling of your hands in his hair, his eyes flicking up to meet yours as he hovers there, with his lips pressed softly to your stomach.

He puffs out his cheeks and blows a raspberry.

“Eddie!” you squeal, trying to get away from him as he cackles, holding you hostage to his assault. You kick your legs and manage to squirm until you throw the both of you off of the couch, rolling with him onto the floor.

Dante gets up from his spot at the end of the couch and disappears through the wall like an apparition. He tends to disappear off into the aether at random times, only to reappear later, whenever he’s hungry or if you call him. You guess that life as a hellhound is busy work. Or, maybe he’s just sick of you and Eddie being revoltingly touchy-feely in front of him.

“I take it back! I take it back, you little fuck–”

“Can’t take it back!” He rolls with you gripping onto your kicking legs until you come to a stop beside the coffee table, straddling his hips. You sit back on your heels to glare down at him, but he’s still chuckling. His eyes twinkle in the low light of your living room. “No takesies-backsies.”

This position is… too familiar. It’s intimate– it’s like you’re two normal lovers on an autumn afternoon, kicking around and doing stupid shit and just enjoying each other’s company.

Something is changing. No matter how sexually charged the relationship has been until now, something feels different. It’s in the way he looks up at you like you hung the moon. It’s in the way you lean forward and trace his lower lip with the tip of your finger, humming to yourself all the while.

Eddie stares directly into your eyes as he slowly opens his mouth and takes your finger between his teeth, his lips curving up into a mischievous smile.

“No,” you sing at him, soft but stern like he’s a misbehaving pet. “Open.”

He blinks, and releases your finger with a curious expression. You lean further down, nearly nudging your nose with his as your fingertip strokes gently down his extended tongue, his hot breath coming out gift wrapped with a sigh. Eddie snakes his arms around your waist as you replace your finger with your own tongue, sealing your mouth against his.

Handsy. You guess that’s what you can call him– you haven’t kissed him like this before, soft and sensual and unrushed. While his tongue works against yours in a way that has your mind reeling, his hands wander down to cup your ass and squeeze, until you squeak against his mouth and lurch against his touch.

The thing about this is… well. You’re not entirely sure where you stand with him anymore. Is he your patron demon? Is he your boyfriend? Infernal demon boyfriend with a sweet streak that only you get to see?

Every nerve in your body is on fire, and he’s seemingly happy to drive you crazy while you try your best not to grind down onto him. It’s all a little bit too much for you to process right now– with the way things are going, you’re wondering if you’re set for life. Who the fuck is going to compare to a demon, now that you have one? What human person will ever match up?

“I think you’ve ruined me for everyone else,” you whisper conspiratorially, letting your lips drag against his.

“Tell you a secret?” Eddie’s voice is warm in the back of his throat. He peers at you through his lashes, eyes heavy-lidded and twinkling with the barest flicker of a flame in his deep brown irises. “That was my plan all along.”

“You monster.”

“You got me all figured out.” He snickers once, dimples indenting rosy cheeks that are much too pretty to belong to a demon, but you’re starting to suspend your disbelief. Eddie’s laughter dies in his chest when your mouth attaches to his neck; a hollow noise takes its place, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallows it down.

Hands hiking his t-shirt up over his stomach, you’re inching your way down his body like you have a plan, and Eddie’s frozen beneath you like he’s trying to figure out what it is. It takes him just a couple seconds, until your tongue connects with the trail of hair running down his stomach, and then he smirks knowingly.

“Oh, I see,” he hums, his eyebrows raising as you lick your way down toward his belt. “You’re a keen little thing, aren’t you? Don’t have to prove anything to me.”

“Shut up, Eddie.” It doesn’t come out as sharp as you intend for it to, because your hands are fiddling with his belt. You pull it free from his jeans and fling it over the coffee table with more force than necessary.

“Buy my silence,” he mutters sarcastically with a shit-eating grin. A playful glimmer sparkles in his eye as you curl your fingers into his waistband and tear at them, but he doesn’t move to help you at all. “Nine ninety-nine a month, with tax. Quick, before the rates go up.”

You’re shaking your head, shooting him a caustic glare as your mouth finds the soft skin just beneath his waistline. You just want to get his pants off however you can– if you have to rip them off of him, so be it.

“Oop– ten ninety-nine a month. Better think fast, baby.”

You yank them down his hips, just low enough that you can nuzzle and lick into the thick patch of hair over his groin. You breathe in the scent of his skin, lingering just beneath all his usual smoke. Warmth and salt, as though he’s real and not just the corporeal manifestation of a spirit.

“...E-eleven– ninety-ni– hmm.” Eddie’s giddy voice dies as a purr in his throat, his head rocking back against the floor. He gasps when drool rolls off of your parted lips, wetting the skin of his hip just before you suck a hickey there. He squirms. “Fuck it. You get it for free.”

“Just wanna suck you off,” you whisper, a little more slack jawed and unhinged than you were before. You suck in a deep breath and lave your tongue over the base of his cock, as it peeks out over the waist of his jeans. “Wanna taste you everywhere, baby.”

“Christ– M’not gonna stop you. Go ahead, take what you want, sweetheart.”

Eddie hisses through his teeth, his hips jumping when you lift his cock out of his pants. Warmth settles in the pit of your stomach, pulsing between your legs when you wrap your fingers around it. It’s so much better than in your dream– it’s thicker, massive, the vein along the bottom pulsing in your hand.

You spit onto it, mixing your saliva with the bead of precum gathered on the head. “You’re so fucking beautiful, Eddie.”

He gasps, kicks his hips up into your fist. “Y–you’re so fucki– hhng–”

You shush him, and look up as you trail your tongue along his shaft, feeling him twitch against you. Mouthing kisses along it, wet and soft, you suck just a bit with each one to watch his chest leap with his breath. “I wanna take you to pieces.”

“Shit–” Eddie lifts his head to gaze down at you, eyes glassy, lips red and parted as he pants. “You’re gorgeous. Oh, honey…”

Eddie moans when you slide his head into your mouth, letting your tongue glide gently over his slit. His hand flies down, tangling into your hair, the metal of his rings digging into your scalp.

You open your mouth and take him in as far as he’ll go, until he hits the back of your throat and you choke.

“Such a good fucking girl for me,” Eddie breathes, his hand on the back of your head grounding you like an anchor. “Just look at you, baby. So fuckin’ perfect, god.”

Actually, you feel like a mess, with spit dribbling down your chin and eyes watering when he hits the back of your throat. Sniffling from the tears and the lack of air, gagging on his cock. Drunk on sin and the taste of his flesh.

You imagine that’s probably what he considers perfection, though.

He stiffens when you swallow around him, your hands wrapping around his hips in an attempt to hold him down. Eddie makes a soft sound in his throat– something you might mistake as submissive, if his hand in your hair weren’t pushing you harder down onto his cock, forcing you to gag on him. The tightening of your throat around him is enough to make him twitch in your mouth.

He sucks in a sharp breath. “Fuck–”

Lips dripping saliva, your throat flexes just before you pull off with a wet gasping noise that makes Eddie curse and tighten his fist in your hair. You can’t be coy, can’t pretend like you aren’t fucking wrecked; you’re a mess of spit and tears, the salt of his precum on your tongue and in the back of your throat.

Dipping your head, you nuzzle down to suck at his balls. Slick lips latching onto soft skin, suckling just enough to make him howl and buck his hips up against your hold. You lap at him with your tongue, hearing his moan crackle in his throat with a prideful grin.

You gaze up at him with glassy eyes when he reaches down with one big hand to fist his swollen cock. Rings glint in the light and catch on his skin with a sharp edge, contrasting your light touch on his balls, making him flex his hips up into his own hand.

You’re mesmerized, watching his hand work in front of your face, with your spit and his fluids spilling over his knuckles. It kicks up a sticky, wet sound that makes something deep in your gut flutter.

“Open your mouth,” Eddie grits out, in such a commanding tone that you don’t even think to question him. You just do.

The muscles of his stomach tightens when he cums, his breath hitching on the inhale. Ropes of white spurt from his tip while he groans so loud it could rattle the ceiling. Some of it gets in your mouth, but most gets on your face– large drops on your cheeks, clinging to your lips and your chin. You moan when you lick the excess from your lips before you swallow, your eyes fluttering shut.

“Fuckin– filthy little girl, aren’t you?” Eddie murmurs, and reaches forward to snatch your face with his wet fingers. His rings dig into your messy cheeks, smearing his cum across your skin.

You gasp, your eyes flying open to meet his, as he grins evilly down at you. It makes you shudder, a moan caught in your throat. Your face burns. The mark on your wrist throbs in the shape of his name.

“Yeah, sweetheart. My dirty girl, all covered in my cum like that.” His thumb pets your cheek, sticky on your skin as he plays with it. “What a pretty fuckin’ painting.”

You whine as he pulls you upwards, clambering over his body. Your cunt throbs between your legs, and it turns worse when he yanks you toward his face.

Eddie’s tongue drags up your cheek, licking his cum off of your face. It makes the blood rush beneath your skin, makes your body heat up with just how filthy it all truly is. He hums low, licking your mouth and letting the tip of his tongue catch on your teeth, leaving your skin wet and stealing the breath from your lungs.

“Hm,” he grunts after a moment, tilting his head as he looks at you. Your cheeks are pinched between his fingers, your lips puckered in a way that you’re sure isn’t very sexy, but he doesn’t seem deterred by it. Eddie cracks a grin and says, “No, I don’t think I’m very sweet. Tastes more umami.”

“Oh my god.” You bark a laugh, ripping your face away from his grip so you can roll off of him.

Eddie snatches you before you can get away, pulling you down so that he can playfully bite at your cheek, giggling along with you. “No, don’t go baby, I gotta clean you up–”

“You’re obnoxious,” you cackle at him, letting him roll with you across the floor, feeling a sort of obsessive delight consume your voice.

He smushes his face against yours, and you can feel his teeth as he grins, scraping your skin. There’s an undertone to your thoughts as he does, which makes your heart pound in your chest when you acknowledge it for what it is.

You love him. You love him. You love him.

#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #stranger things #tdik!fic #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x y/n #demon!eddie munson #demon!eddie #stranger things fic #roses*

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peachypede · 1 month ago

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Creation Day

Father's day thing for Ratchet with my oc. This is pre-war so Ratchet is a bit softer. My au Ratchet is a combination of many different Ratchets. IV is a forged Cybertronian made by him and this is the day she gets turned online. All fluff here.

The ceiling is red, blue, and yellow in a simple dotted pattern.

Pretty.

She lifts a servo up, as if attempting to touch the colors.

“Ep, ep, ep! No moving yet!” The sharp voice startles her, causing her pull back her servo immediately. There’s a larger mech, red and white with a stern face, beside her berth. He moves closer to gently put her servo down beside her on the berth where it had been before she came online. His servo then comes to rest on the top of her helm, gentle and reassuring. There is a computer in front of him that he types into. “You just turned online today. We need to calibrate you properly. Make sure I did everything right…”

She knows him despite never really meeting him. He’s Ratchet, one of the most proficient doctors on Cybertron, but her coding tells her the most important thing about him to her is that he’s her creator.

And he loves her.

“Hello.” She says as she smiles up at him with bright blue eyes. The pupils of them white like little stars. It earns the first of many gentle smiles she receives from her creator.

“Hello, my little starlight.” He chuckles, rubbing her helm. “I’m glad your voice box is working properly.”

She blinks.

“Is Starlight my name?”

“No, no.” Ratchet is chuckling again. “Your name is IV.”

“IV…and I am a medical assistant!”

“Yes, you are. For your formative years, at least. After that, who knows. Maybe further schooling...” He types a bit more on his computer. IV realizes she has sensors all over her frame and innately she knows these are for taking medical readings. “You have a systolic pressure of 180…sparkthrum is 30 cycles per minute…”

“Those are normal readings for a bot my size.”

“Yes, they are. Good. Your programmed knowledge is working.”

IV beams, happy to gain his praise.

“Now you can move a bit. Lift your helm up and down, please.”

The new forgeling does so, nodding her helm against the berth.

“Good. Now lift your servos…”

They go on. Meticulously. Step by step. Ratchet is thorough in testing if her systems run well and IV is happy to follow every order. The ceiling is those colors and patterns for a reason she finds out. A way to properly calibrate her optics with introducing her to various different colors as the first thing she sees.

Once her optics, arms, servos, legs, and pedes are all checked for proper movement, Ratchet begins to take off her medical sensors and prompts her to sit up in the berth.

“Careful now. If everything is correct, and it should be, then you should be able to walk with no trouble at all.”

Her creator holds out his servos, expectant, and IV places hers in them. They’re big and warm compared to hers. The sensitive pads on her palm and digits detect textures of worn metal in them. His servos are the first thing she’s ever properly felt other than the berth and she is distracted. The smaller digits trace the worn textures and find tiny dents. Her creator is an older mech, worn down by time, and it’s her first realization of age as well. Strange, new, and fascinating.

Ratchet can’t help but gaze fondly down at his creation, also distracted by the curiosity she takes in his servos. Cycles of work, all of the free time he had off, all poured into his creation before him that was finally moving and exploring the world. Her creation day. A day he had been looking forward to for a long, long time.

He gently closes his digits around her servos. This gains her attention as she looks up at him.

“First steps. Come on.” He’s excited. Anticipation made him rush the moment a bit. His internal camera is waiting to take the pictures, even though he already had taken multiple of her first smiles.

He begins to help her pull away from the berth. Her pedes touch the floor and she’s slightly shaky but her systems calibrate and she begins to walk. The larger medbot lets go of her for a bit, she stumbles slightly but re-calibrates again and she walks normally once more.

IV grins and laughs and does a small spin.

“Careful! We’re not doing anything special here!” Ratchet can’t help but laugh as well, grabbing onto her before she was about to attempt to run. He hugs her tightly and she returns it, her face nuzzling against his chassis. He hums and rests his chin on the top of her helm.

His sparkling is perfect.

#peachy draws #peachy writes #I haven't written in so long and I'm scared ;.;#Sharing oc stuff is scary in general #but i persist for some reason #oc IV #transformers oc #transformers ratchet #tf ratchet #maccadams #happy fathers day

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i-have-stolen-endless-names · 5 months ago

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The Devil In Love - Chapter 1 "The First Step"

Possible Trigger Warnings

>>Alucard is a Warning on his own.<<

Overall Yandere Themes

Mentions of: Manipulation, Stalking, Alucard is thinking of biting you and drinking your blood, the beginning of obsessive and possessive behavior

Minors please do not interact!

Content

Reader is working at the Hellsing manor as a housekeeper

Story is set before the happenings of Hellsing - Still Spoilers ahead

Reader is gender neutral, no pronouns are used but "you"

Age, ethnicity, height, weight and any other physical attributes are never mentioned. You are free and encouraged to imagine yourself or an OC in this scenario.

Summary

Overall a rather harmless chapter

Alucard and Reader get to know each other better

Index

Previous Chapter: Prologue Next Chapter: In A Demons Embrace

Follow me for more!

Technology always interested him. The allure of modernity was something this old vampire was very curious about. Computer… the internet… Humanity evolved so quickly. This little invisible network they created was the closest they would ever have to magic. At least for those who have no access to such an ancient power. However, he must admit, those new courting rules were curious to him.

Alucard was by no means a foolish man. He had been very intelligent from the start. Had he been born in a time not torn apart by war, he could have had chances to become a great man. Not a man stained with blood. Not a man who was corrupted with power.

Nonetheless, the shift of old world courting and modern dating was… a curious thing. He had many lovers in his old life. Women, men, people who were neither or all at once. If he had any more knowledge about the "modern slang" he most likely would be labelled as pansexual. Nothing would stop this man from pursuing what he wanted. What he needed. His reason for desire was currently busy.

You were busy. Typing away on the keyboard in front of a massive computer. Hellsing had the most modern technology available and yet it all still looked so very chunky.

Not even Alucard could imagine that in a few years everything would change. As usual, he had been watching you for a while before he manifested behind you. Ittook so adorably long for you to notice him. The startled noise that left you amused him immensely. "Good evening."A sharp fanged grin welcomed you. His presence made you still a bit nervous. How delectable

"Good evening….I did not hear you come in." Your comment made him chuckle. He rarely used doors. Sliding through the walls was much more amusing. Especially when he could scare you in the process. "A library is supposed to be quiet, is it not?" His eyes narrowed with mirth. "May I join you?"

Always so polite, one could almost forget that he was a monster lusting after you. Once you have given him permission he sat next to you. Perhaps he had pulled the chair intentionally way too close to yours. Your knees were touching.

"What is the little help doing, mh?" One of the many nicknames he had given you. "Taking a break. I was checking this new website and…" You startled to babble about whatever currently interested you. His lips curled upward and he listened intently to you.

lt was curious, really, how suddenly he felt himself intrigued by your interests. Perhaps he should gain some more information about your little hobbies. He listened… and listened…

At one point he threaded his fingers together and leaned back in the chair. It almost appeared as if the vampire was content simply letting you talk for a very long time. Until you started to change the topic.

"On that note, there had not been many vampire attacks recently, have there?" Look at you, showing interest in his work as well. Or maybe you just had false hope that no more ghouls would threaten humanities existence. "How perceptive of you. I indeed have not been called to any mission for a while now."

Drinking from blood bags was simply not the same as devouring some hot blooded little thing, like you.

"What do you do when you are not out and about shooting ghouls?" Your question took him a bit off guard. What did he do? Aside from suffering nightmares and remembering the past…

Surely you would not appreciate being told that he was watching you so often. Even though he was a monster he still had his charm, in his own twisted way. Seemingly you took his silence as nothing positive, the little frown on your face was precious. "I enjoy going to the library."

Hellsings library was big. It offered books, computer and a silent space to do other things. Once he had seen a little maid painting in this room. The room simply offered many possibilities. "You should join me more often." What a horrible mistake to make. Perhaps you see him as this little thing that needed coddling.

Maybe you were simply lonely and sought any company you could get. Whatever it was… he could not stop the grin from forming onto his lips. Your occasional "accidental" meetings now had turned into something much more frequent and willing.

It may not occur to you but you were blindly feeding into his obsession. Like a little lamb strutting over to the wolf, so naive…

"It would be my greatest pleasure." For the first time in centuries something else than bloodshed excited him.

----------------------------------------------------------

Comments, likes, and reblogs are appreciated. Please engage with this post if you want me to continue writing. I hope you enjoyed it!

#hellsing alucard x reader #alucard x reader #soft yandere #gender neutral reader #vampire x reader #yandere love #yandere x reader #x reader #hellsing #hellsing ultimate #fanfic #fanfiction #hellsing fanfiction #vampire x human

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cozy-writes-things · 1 year ago

Note

Hiii ~‼️if you're still taking requests

I'd like to request some Edgar x Reader 😈

But the reader is self conscious about how they look, and they've gotten genuinely upset about it and Edgar comforts them, ending with some sweet kisses on his lil monitor 🙏🙏🤭

Eeee tysm for the request!! Hehehe he WILL be making sure you know how beautiful you are. If you don't believe him he'll get angy. Probably. anyway im a certified idiot so theres probably so many errors but i dont have grammarly so oopsie

The lump in your throat seems to have gotten stuck.

No matter how hard you swallow, it remains there, bobbing, imploring the welling tears to spill over and fall from your already puffy eyes.

You feel ridiculous right now.

Your lips, plump and swollen, eyes all red, and strained knit in your brow make you feel like a fool. And perhaps you are one.

The mirror stares back at you bitterly. Its reflection seems to be taunting you, pulling you into its trance, and reveling in your pain.

You’re so disgusting.

It feels as though the reflective glass is whispering to you, its loud, shrill voice highlighting every single flaw, and mocking you from the inside out. It has somehow wormed its way into your head, nesting there, and festering into an avalanche of thoughts, emotions, and self hatred about to collapse.

Please, pull yourself together.

You can’t do this right now, you think.

But god, you feel miserable, and it seems as though your own visage is reflecting it perfectly. How come your face is so… wrong? It’s a sight you can’t quite describe. You look at yourself in the mirror and see a stranger looking back at you.

“Hey,” Edgar’s voice provides a miniscule break from the battle you wage against yourself, albeit barely, “aren’t you supposed to meet them at 4:30?”

Ah, yes. He’s always looking out for you. It almost made you feel worse, in some sick, twisted way. How could someone like you deserve someone like him? He may be different, but you were sure if he were human, he would be far better looking than you. He simply has to; his personality is far too charming and handsome for his face to not reflect it. Even now, as an old, yellowing computer, you feel as though he’s got you beat in terms of looks.

But that’s not saying much, is it? Anything is better to look at than you.

You stare back into your dull, sunken eyes.

You hear Edgar’s voice call out your name, faintly, and only then do you realize you had completely ignored him.

Some friend you are, huh? Couldn’t just be ugly on the outside, could you?

All of these thoughts swarming your head seem to finally tip the scales. This war you’ve waged for so long is finally coming to an end as you slap your palm over your lips to cover the silent sob racking your chest and lungs.

The lump in your throat remains.

It burns now, sending searing hot jolts down your throat and into your very core, heating your tears from the inside out, as they spill over and leave icy trails down your puffy cheeks.

Something about trying, and failing, to hide hushed sobs causes your throat to ache and your knees to start giving out. You want to collapse to the floor and let it swallow you whole, but you can’t. You can’t let Edgar know just how gross you really are. It seems like he’s somehow been deceived into thinking you’re someone you’re not, and the idea of him seeing the truth, terrifies you.

He calls your name again.

This time, with a sense of worry and urgency. It seems your hushed weeping sept through the walls and into his ever-so-sensitive audio processors.

You should have seen that coming.

“Edgar, I…”

You meekly call out to him, trying to mask the tremor in your voice as it cracks and reverberates through the air.

“What’s wrong? Are you alright? Why are you crying?”

He sounded quite distressed now. He had become all too familiar with the sound of anguish in one’s voice; the way he could simply hear the tears against your cheeks in the words you spoke and your soft pants as you tried to conceal your sobs sent a pain so strong and embedded so deeply inside of him it scared him.

“I don’t think I’m going anymore,” your voice murmured out, completely defeated, concealed by the bathroom door.

Normally this would make him happy, getting to spend more time with you, but he knew this was wrong. Something was wrong. He couldn’t stand hearing you like this, knowing how excited you were, and now you’re not going? He loves spending time with you, but he also knows just how happy you are to have friends that care about you and want to spend time with you, and he can always see just how energized and radiant you seem when you come home to him, your sweet giggles sending him to cloud nine.

“Will you please come out?”

He knows you hear him. His speakers are turned up far too loud for you not to have heard him. But, he gets no reply.

“…Please?”

He hears you still ever so slightly behind the bathroom door.

“Will you just let me help you? At least let me try?”

It nearly made him combust hearing you like this. He wished more than anything he could crawl out of his stupid screen and embrace you in the way you deserved; he felt simply useless in this moment. The silence hangs in the air, and for a moment, he worries that he may never break through to you until he notices the doorknob, fidgeting in place, gently unlocking and turning. The door cracked open ever so slightly and your face came into view.

Your beautiful face, all stained with tears and swollen.

How could he let you get this way?

You were absolutely magnificent to him. You had done yourself up tastefully and he thought you looked perfect. He had never seen that outfit before. You styled your hair extra nicely today. Despite your expression, you were simply glowing, so why were you so heartbreakingly crestfallen?

He hummed, a sound of relief, seeing you slowly creep out, trying desperately to hide your chaotic and jumbled emotions.

“You look great. What’s got you so upset?”

Your face turned sour at his words.

“Please stop trying to flatter me. It will never work.”

A question mark appeared on his screen.

“Flatter you? What are you talking about?”

You frantically waved your hands between yourself and the little pinecone computer flashing with worry, “This! I’m talking about this! You keep telling me these things that aren’t true. Why are you lying to me? Do you just feel sorry for me?”

Maybe your emotions caused you to lash out. But, in the moment, you felt justified. It felt like everyone was lying straight to your face anytime they’d have the gall to compliment someone like you.

Edgar’s screen went dark. Perhaps he was angry, or thinking, or maybe even realizing that you’re right, you are ugly, and he’s going to leave you high and dry. You wouldn’t blame him.

“When have I ever… lied to you?”

You stare at your feet.

His voice sounded hurt. Accused. Maybe you went too far. You didn’t mean to push your pain onto him. Not like this.

“You always tell me how- how good I look, or how wonderful I look, or- or…”

You try to swallow down the tears beginning to resurface, “how you think I’m pretty and… why say those things when I look like this?”

He was silent.

It stretched on for what felt like eternity. He must be angry with you. You would be angry if you were in his place. You’re sure of it.

His soft chuckle throws you off guard, however.

“Are you kidding? Do you really think I’d lie about that?”

You can’t bring yourself to look up at his screen.

“You are beautiful. How you can’t see that is what I want to know. Here, you know what?”

You hear his fans begin to whir to life, ever so faintly.

“Look at me.”

You lift your head up to his screen. It’s black. Until a number one pops up on the top left corner. Then a two, then three, until a long list of numbers spans the right and left columns of his screen. He’s making a list.

“You’re funny,” his screen displays this at the number one spot, “your eyes are so pretty,” again, it pops up in the number two spot, and he continues to list off every single thing he finds charming about you.

“The way your laugh sounds makes me happy, and- and your lips! They look perfect to have kisses. I stare at them all the time. And your-“

“Kisses?”

You’re burning red from embarrassment now. Why was he doing this? He’s telling you things about yourself you’ve never even noticed, and you can’t help but wonder just how often he stares at you to note these things himself.

“I- I mean… yeah… your lips look just like the ones on TV who kiss each other,” his fans kick up to a much louder degree, “who wouldn’t want to kiss them?”

Oh, god. What is he saying right now? You choke and sputter.

“You’re- you’re not saying that you-“

“That I want to kiss you?”

You clamp your mouth shut and nod, incredibly flustered.

“If you come here, I-…”

The list on his screen fades away, the seemingly endless numbers returning to meet his usual green.

“…I’ll show you exactly what I meant.”

His voice seemed so tender and gentle you felt compelled to move towards him. Your feet shuffled to your little rolling chair, and you plopped down in it, staring at him, completely dazed. You’re just too flustered for this.

“You aren’t gonna keep me waiting are you? I’d lean in, but… I can’t.”

You smile softly. Maybe he’s right.

Maybe.

Right now, you focus on planting your lips onto every little pixel he’s got, feeling his warm static tickle your nose, as he sighs into your touch.

“See? I told you. Perfect for kissing!”

Your face is on fire, pulsing up into your ears and down your neck.

“Now, go have fun with your friends, and I’ll show you more when you get back.”

The wink he displays on his screen seems quite audacious.

#electric dreams 1984 #ai x reader #artificial intelligence x reader #edgar electric dreams x reader #electric dreams edgar #electric dreams x reader #electric dreams #edgar electric dreams #i love edgar #objectum #electric dreams edgar x reader

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lonely-ey3s · 6 months ago

Text

With All My Love : Chapter 5 | say a little prayer for me

Pairing: joel miller x f!reader, no outbreak

Word count : 13.6k

Chapter Summary: After rescuing Commander Williams and sending Maria back to Delta 27, you and Jack go back to Delta 30 to find and rescue Z and Reggie. Joel has a hard time with your absence, feeling himself fall apart. He can't imagine what life will be like if you don't come back.

Chapter warnings: fluff, flirting, mutual pining, language, mentions of combat and war, blood, violence, hand-to-hand combat, mentions of guns and a knife, anxiety, panic attacks, use of Y/N, smut (MDNI 18+), descriptions of injuries, ANGST, switched POV's.

A/N: all imma say is this one is a roller-coaster... enjoy 🖤

Dividers by: @saradika-graphics

Main Masterlist

Joel’s POV

It’s only been 24 hours since your last message. Joel was going crazy, checking his phone every five minutes, had the news on constantly, and he even got so desperate and called the army at one point to ask the status of you. They hung up on him telling him that it was confidential information and that your location could not be disclosed.

Tommy would call or check on him every few hours to see if he had heard anything. Both the Miller brothers were on edge, and couldn’t focus on anything but their girls.

Over the next 3 days Joel would message your chat when he felt overwhelmed, missed you, or felt anxious he blew up your chat log with about 20+ messages.

‘Baby, please come back to me. I need you…’

‘You are everything I want and more. I need you to come back to me.’

‘I hate that I can’t take your place and it can’t be me out in harm's way.’

‘I love you darlin’, but I need to say that to you with my arms around you, lips to yours. I need you here with me.’

‘Please come back to me and Sarah. We need you in our lives. Now that you’re here, we aren’t, I’m not letting you go.’

‘I want to spend the rest of my days with you, taking care of you, protecting you, loving you… please, I can’t lose you.’

‘I want to write poems on your skin with my lips.’

‘I will never forget the moment I realized I loved you.’

‘You changed my world darlin’. I can’t imagine my life without you in it.’

‘One day, I’m gonna marry you. Spend the rest of my days trying to make you as happy as you make me.’

‘I got your letter today… Let’s do that barbeque when you get home. I’ll invite everyone for you to meet, we’ll make it a big deal, I’ll have Sarah decorate the yard and house, you and I, we’ll cook all day together, then we’ll host the best damn barbeque you’ve seen. And I’m taking you dancin’, we’ll get all dressed up, and I’ll get you your own hat and boots. We’ll dance the night away. I’ll hold you so close and sing to you how much I love you. I’d sing it from the rooftops, my love.’

‘You asked for my ideas, I wanna take you out to this place in the city, I already have our name down, since theirs a waitlist. I wanna get you dressed up, take you shoppin’ for anything you want, then take you out and worship the ground you walk on. You deserve only the best, my love’

‘I wanna take you and Sarah to a concert to that artist ya’ll like, Taylor Swift? I’ve been listenin’ to her music, learnin’ the words, so I can sing along with you both. The second you get home for good, I’m bookin' tickets.’

‘I wanna take you up in my truck to this lookout a few miles away from here, we can get pillows and blankets and deck the damn truck out with those fairy lights if you want to, then we can star gaze and I can wrap you in my arms and hold you while you watch the universe above us, while I hold mine.’

Joel came home the second day to Sarah looking at his computer, he hadn’t told her what was going on, he didn’t want her to worry, she looked at him with tears in her eyes, “Is Y/N going to die?” she asked.

He set his things down and grabbed her into a hug, “No, no baby girl. She’s not gonna die…” he held her and kissed her head.

“Then why are you sayin’ all those things? Why did she say those things? Dad, what’s going on?” she held onto him, tears slowly coming down her face.

He held her in his arms and told her as much as he knew, told her that you and Maria were assigned to rescue someone really important because you two were really good at what you did and that the assignment was 3 days and that you would be pulled out by the 3rd day which would be tomorrow.

She asked why he didn’t tell her, she knew he had been stressed the last couple of days but just thought it was work.

He told her he didn’t want to burden her with things that were so uncertain, he was trying to protect her, not hide anything.

The two of them watched a movie together that night and ordered some pizza. The next morning when she asked to stay home from school to be home when news came in, Joel didn’t hesitate to say yes.

Tommy came over early the next morning and the three of them anxiously waited by their phones and computers. Hoping, praying, and wishing to hear from you or Maria with good news of your safety.

When Tommy’s laptop dinged that afternoon, they all froze, not knowing what they would now learn was the outcome of the two women they loved.

Reader’s POV

Jack followed you as you went through the building, the both of you watching for threats and clearing every space you went through.

You knew you needed to get Reggie and Z out safely. Still, something in you tugged to get all of your belongings from Joel, at least all your letters and pictures from him, and if you could, grab your laptop as that could prove to be helpful for communication if the radio went down, but also when you had a moment to let Joel know you were ok.

You first wanted to find Z, he was your priority. He was probably terrified and you hoped with everything he was safe.

When you left for your first field assignment and saw how many children were dead in the street, out in the open, you told yourself that wouldn’t happen to Z. When you got back, you told Z that the second he heard anything that would signal it is a combat zone he needed to get inside somewhere and suggested he go to either your bunkhouse or Reggie and Terrence’s. You prayed he would be in one of them, make it easy to grab him and get out.

You looked back at Jack as you stopped at the end of the stairs, “How far of a walk is it to Delta 27?”

“If we can find a car, that would be better but it's about a 10-mile walk… maybe more.”

You nodded, one more thing to do, find a car.

“Ok, once we find Reggie and Z, we need to find a car and then get to 27.” you said thinking, and then took a breath, “Jack I need you to promise me if anything happens to me you’ll get Z out safely…” you looked at him, trying to hold it together.

Jack looked at you, putting a hand on your shoulder, “I know we just met but for right now, you and I are partners, we are getting out of here. Even if I have to make a deal with the devil, I’m getting us out of here, alive.”

You nodded and let out a puff of air, “I know, I trust you.”

Your leg was killing you, you glanced down and then opened up your medic pouch and pulled out a syringe and bottle of lidocaine, you drew up a small amount and then injected it around the wound, to provide you temporary numbness to the area. You also swallowed two pain relievers with some of the water you had and then looked at Jack as you zipped your pouch back up.

“Ok, if we are where I think we are, we need to head up north, if he listened to me, he’s in one of our two bunk houses… Reggie could be actively triaging in the med tent but I have no idea. We will get Z and then look for him, sound good?” you said as you made sure your ammo was full and everything was in working order.

Jack nodded, “Got it.”

You pulled your necklace out again and kissed it, “Say a little prayer for me cowboy…” you said and then took a breath and opened the door, you and Jack making your way up the road.

Maria’s POV

Maria made it to 27 and saw within minutes that Reggie had made it there too, he must have been evacuated before things got bad.

“Oh thank god you’re ok!” Reggie came over and started working on Maria when he looked around for you, “Wait, where’s Y/N?” he asked, then looked down at her, worried.

“She went back into 30 to look for you and Z!” she said, wincing just as he started treating her shoulder wound. “Reggie, I need your radio… I need to get in contact with her. She’ll go on a wild goose chase looking for you.” she looked up at him.

Reggie looked at Maria and nodded, he looked at another medic, “Hey, get me the radio!” the other medic nodded and then left to grab it.

Reggie started pulling away the packing gauze you had done on Maria’s abdomen when she looked at him with hope in her eyes, “Reggie, you wouldn’t happen to have grabbed your laptop before leaving, did you?”

Reggie nodded concentrating on working on the wound, “Yeah, why?”

“I need it, I need to alert someone about our safety back at home. Can I use it when you’re done? Please?” Maria pleaded.

Reggie nodded, “Of course… you just need to let me do my job before you ask for all these amenities, damn.” he chuckled and began sewing up her wound, “You’re lucky, this wasn’t too bad of a hit, almost hit your spleen but missed it by a hair. You’ll be fine there, but your shoulder is done, you’ll be released to go back home on medical discharge.” he said as he worked, “You lucky bastard. You and Terrence getting shot, getting to go back home. Why can’t I get shot?” he jokingly said.

“Oh shut up, it’s not all that glamorous, it hurts like a bitch.” Maria groaned as he continued with his sutures.

The other medic came over with the radio, Maria switched to the channel that you had been on last, “Delta 30, this is Maria in 27, do you copy?” she said softly.

She waited a few moments before repeating herself.

More static came through and then Jack’s voice came through, “Delta 27 this is Jack in Delta 30, we copy.”

Maria smiled and whispered, “Thank god.” to herself before hitting the button again, “Jack, are you still with Y/N? Over…”

“Maria? Is that you? Over.” she heard your voice come through.

“Yes, and I have Reggie here too. He made it out. You’re only looking for Z, got it? Over.” she said.

“Roger that. We are heading to his potential location now. Will keep you posted. Over.” you said and then there was a loud explosion in the background.

Maria’s heart sank, “Y/N? Jack? Are you still there? Over?”

There was static for a few moments and then Jack came through, “We are still here, but we need to go so we can get out of here. Over.”

“Roger that. Stay safe and we will see you soon. Over and out.” Maria said before handing the radio back to Reggie who then set it on the table next to her bedside.

Reggie had also gone and got his laptop, “Here, do you need some help sitting up?” he asked softly.

Maria nodded and he helped her sit up gently and slowly.

Maria logged into her Skype account and messaged Tommy who she saw was already online, her hands were shaky from all the adrenaline and pain, and she figured typing out an update would take twice as long.

‘Hey babe, can you talk?’ she messaged.

Instantly Tommy initiated a call, and Maria answered.

“Oh thank god. Where are you? Are you back at base camp?” Tommy asked with a sigh of relief.

She heard in the background Joel’s voice, they must’ve been both panicking waiting for you both to contact them. “Maria?” Joel said coming to come look at the screen.

He looked like a wreck, his eyes were red and puffy like he had been crying, Tommy had the same look. Both of them with looks of worry and concern written all over their faces.

“Where’s Y/N? Is she ok? I haven’t heard from her, but you’re calling, where is she?” Joel said in a panic, eyes tearing up thinking the worst had happened.

“Joel, I need you to take a deep breath for me. Y/N is fine.” Maria said softly.

“Then where is she?” he said voice cracking.

“Long story short, I got hurt in the field as we were leaving… Y/N literally walked into open gunfire and pulled me out to safety. She then carried me up 13 flights of stairs to where we were taken away via aircraft rescue.” she said softly. “On our way back the pilot was told that Delta 30, which is our home base, was under attack and was an active combat zone. She and Jack convinced the pilot to drop them off as they would need reinforcements and wanted to get Reggie and Z out.”

Joel put his head in his hands, ‘Of course, you did that… you wouldn’t leave Z behind’ he thought to himself.

“When was this? Who’s Jack?” he said quietly, trying to gather everything you told him and process it. Tommy sighed and put his hand on Joel's back to comfort him.

“We dropped them off about an hour ago, however, I just radioed her and Jack, I let them know that Reggie was here, that they just needed to get Z out…” Maria explained, seeing how stressed Joel was. “Joel, she’s going to be ok… Jack is a Special Forces para-rescuer, he’s one of the best, she’s safe with him.”

He nodded, hearing about Jack’s qualifications then processed what she said before, “Wait you radioed? Did you make contact? Is she ok?” he looked up at Maria from his hands, hopeful, wanting to know the most up-to-date status on your safeness. If he were a cricket and sat on your shoulder while you did all this, that would be his dream, but all he could do was sit and hope for your safety.

Maria nodded, “She confirmed she was ok and they were on their way to gather Z. After our last assignment, we told him where to hide in these situations- so it should be a pretty fast rescue, and then depending if they can get air support or find a vehicle, depends how quickly they can get here. It’s about an 11-mile distance from here to there.”

Joel nodded, “Was she hurt at all? Knowing her she’d go in hurt or not.” he chuckled softly, tears streaming down his face, he knew your stubbornness knew no bounds when it came to Z.

Maria nodded, “She has a cut on her arm from an attack we had earlier today, but I patched her up in the field, she should be fine… and then as she was loading into the aircraft when we were leaving Delta 42, she was shot on her leg, but it was barely a graze wound. Hell, she treated it in the aircraft and just had a small limp. Both aren’t too serious, and she’s so damn stubborn she wouldn’t let that stop her.” Maria said with a small chuckle.

Joel and Tommy both chuckled, nodding in unison, “She’s so damn stubborn, it’ll be the death of me.” Joel said smiling softly then pinching the bridge of his nose between his fingers, holding away a headache he was getting from crying the last few hours.

“Oh Joel, she also told me to tell you: ‘I meant my last message with everything in me and I’ll keep my promise, it’s just taking me longer, but I’ll make it back’...” Maria said softly.

Joel knew exactly what you meant, it was exactly what he needed to hear.

“Thank you, Maria, I needed to hear that.” he smiled softly and some sadness behind it.

The radio went off with a whistle and then an explosion before a voice came through, your voice, “Delta 27 this is Delta 30, Maria, you still there?! Over.”

Joel instantly perked up and moved closer to the laptop, on the edge of his seat, hands up to his face like he was praying.

Maria hurried and grabbed the radio holding a finger up to the boys on the screen to stay quiet and to hold on, “Delta 30, this is Delta 27… this is Maria, what’s going on?”

“Maria I’m in our bunkhouse, I… it's bad over here…” another whistle and explosion went off, “Shit… uh… things will get lost, what do you need me to grab for you from Regin- fuck, I mean Tommy? Over.”

Joel heard the explosions and chaos in the background, his heart sank thinking you were close to danger. Tears started streaming down his face. His legs were bouncing with anxiety.

“Fuck, you idiot, get out of there, leave it, your safety is more important than some letters! Over!” she shouted and then looked at Tommy, “Sorry Tommy, I-...”

Tommy chuckled, “No need to apologize, baby, I agree with you. Just means I’ll need to write ya more letters.” he winked.

You came back through, chuckling, “Cool, so everything, got it! Over!”

Maria huffed frustrated with your lack of urgency or lack of awareness of your current situation, “Y/N so help me, if you don’t leave my shit and get out of there, I’ll order an air strike on you myself… get out of there now! Over.”

No answer, static.

Maria pushed the button again, “Delta 30, do you copy?”

Static.

Then after everyone held their breath for what seemed like minutes, you came through out of breath, “I’m here! I dropped the radio, sorry. We got everything, we are headed to Reggie’s bunkhouse now. I will keep you posted. Over and out!”

“Wait! Maria, can I tell her something?” Joel asked with tears falling down his face.

Maria nodded and then called out over the radio, “Delta 30, this is Delta 27. I have Joel for you, do you copy?”

Almost immediately, he heard you out of breath, “Joel? Jo-” whistle and then an explosion closer than he heard before, “Shit, Joel? Can you hear me? Over.”

Joel grabbed his chest hearing the explosion and smiled hearing your voice say his name, he started to sob softly and then asked, “I can hear you, baby, can you hear me? Over.”

He could hear you crying, “I can hear you cowboy. Thank god… I needed to hear your voice.” there was a pause with some static, “I’m almost done, I promise. I’ll make it back. Over.”

“I know, I know you will sweetheart, I just need you to stay safe, ok? Get Z and then get out. Don’t stay and try to help, come help where Reggie is. Come back to me. Over.” he said through tears.

“I will. I love you.” there was a pause and static, “Joel, I love you. Over.”

He smiled and chuckled, tears continuing to stream down his face, “I love you too, b-but you don’t get to say that again until you’re back here safe with me. Ok? You don’t get to say that as ‘in case you’re going to die I love you’. Over.” he pleaded.

He could hear your soft laugh, “You have yourself a deal cowboy. I’ll see you soon. Over and out.”

Then there was nothing but static.

Maria looked at Joel and Tommy, “She’s in good hands, Jack and her are good together, they had great instincts in Delta 42. They’ll be ok.” she tried to help ease so much anxiety she knew Joel was feeling.

Joel nodded and then sat back in his seat and started doing something he had been doing over and over in the last few days, praying, for you.

Reader’s POV

You had cleared your bunkhouse, but Z wasn’t there. Instead, you grabbed everything of yours and Maria’s, including your laptop. You didn’t care what Maria said, you knew these letters meant the same amount to her as they did to you from Joel. You grabbed all of the photos in your desk drawer that he had sent you and the candle he sent and booked it out of there as explosions kept shaking the place and if you didn’t get out, you could be trapped in.

After you got around a huge debris sight and took some back roads, Jack and you were headed to Reggie’s bunkhouse when he held out a fist for you to stop walking. The road was covered with dust, visibility was low, and something seemed off.

You swallowed and tried to control your breathing, you looked at Jack for direction, and he looked at you, “Is there another way? This seems too risky…”

You shook your head, “No, it's this or nothing…” However, you agreed, that it was risky. “We couldn’t go up the main road, it’s blocked, this is the only side road…” you said scanning the area with your eyes.

“Ok. Then we go in, back to back, walking sideways. There is a very high possibility of an ambush…” Jack said, pulling out his knife as well and holding it in his hand while he aimed his rifle up.

You nodded and let out a breath, “The bunk house is no more than 50 yards straight ahead, then if Z is there, we can keep moving back up the north road to look for a vehicle. The north gate should be an easy exit point.” you said looking over at him while he gathered himself and turned around to go back to back with you.

“Got it. Let’s take this slow and steady, shoot anything that moves, ok?” he looked back at you.

“Got it.” you nodded and then put your eye to your scope.

You and Jack made it up the road with only two hiccups, one being you almost got killed but your hat saved your life, and the second was that Jack got shot in the upper arm, but it was a graze wound like your leg, something that could be assessed when you were in somewhere safe. You got to the bunkhouse and started to clear it out, scanning the area, you whispered, “Z?!” you heard a sound to the right of you and pointed your rifle straight at it, finger ready to pull the trigger.

The flashlight shined, showing Z, hiding under the bunk bed, you moved your rifle so he could see your face, putting your safety on, “Z!” you said and knelt, holding out your arms.

He immediately climbed out, limping, “Khahar!” he ran as best he could and hugged you, “I did what you told me, I hid and made no sounds, I was good.” he said crying into your embrace.

You hugged him tightly, “Yes, you did so good. I’m so proud of you, you’re so brave.”

He looked back at you and smiled, tears streaming down his face, “I couldn’t find Reggie, I looked, is he ok?”

You nodded and wiped his tears with your gloves, softly laughing, “He’s ok. He was able to get out. He’s with Maria at another camp, she got hurt, but going to be ok. We are going to meet them there, yeah?”

He nodded, and you looked down at his leg, “Z, are you hurt?”

He nodded, “I got hit in the ankle with something heavy when I ran in here. It hurts really bad.” he cried in obvious pain.

You nodded and put his face in your hands to comfort him, “Can I look at it? See if I can help?” you asked, looking into his eyes, softly smiling.

He nodded and sniffled.

“Ok, can you sit down for me?” you asked softly.

He sat down on the ground in front of you and you pulled out a flashlight, sticking it between your teeth. The room had little to no light, something must have affected its power in an explosion.

You looked it over and determined that he had a broken ankle, nothing you could do now for him except manage his pain.

You took the flashlight out of your mouth and looked at Jack, “Can you hold this for me?” you asked him, handing him the flashlight, he knelt and nodded.

You unzipped your pouch and started drawing up some morphine, “I need to give you a shot Z, it’s going to help with your pain, can you be a brave boy and let me do that for you?” you asked softly, looking up at him.

He took a few deep breaths and then nodded.

You gave him the shot in his inner arm through a vein and then wrapped it with a gauze pad and some stretchy tape.

You looked at Jack, “Let me take a look at your arm…” you said taking the flashlight to look at his arm.

“I’m fine, I’ll be fine.” he went to stand when you pulled him back down by his sleeve.

“Yeah I’m not askin’, that was a statement Mr. Tough Guy.” you teased, looking over his arm.

You pulled out your water tin and poured some water on it and then patted it dry with some gauze as it had gotten some debris in it. “You want a Hello Kitty or Disney Princess bandaid?” you asked as you sprayed some anti-bacterial spray on it.

“You have those options?” Jack questioned, not catching on that you were joking around.

You chuckled, “Jack, I’m an army medic, do you really think I have those options with me?” you said as you put some clean gauze over the wound and then began wrapping it with some CoFlex bandage tape. Z giggled at Jack's face as he stuck his tongue out at you.

He rolled his eyes and chuckled, “No… but for the record always Disney Princesses, and it better be Cinderella.” he stood when you finished.

You chuckled, “Doesn’t surprise me you’re a Cinderella guy…” you teased.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” he said, offended.

You laughed and looked up at him, “I don’t know… you just have this, energy, not a bad thing, just sayin’...” you winked and looked down at your pouch, putting things back in.

“Mmhm, sure.” Jack shook his head and chuckled.

You zipped back up your pouch and looked back up at Jack, “Ok, so, he can’t walk, I need to carry him. Can you cover us?”

He nodded, “Yeah, if you can guide me, I can do that.”

You nodded and scooped Z up in your arms, and kissed the top of his head gently, “Z, this is my friend Jack, he’s going to help get us out of here, ok?”

He smiled at Jack, “Hello Mr. Jack.”

Jack smiled and shook his hand through Z’s hair to make him giggle, “Hello Z…”

Z giggled and then nuzzled into your neck, you looked at him and smiled, “Can you put your arms around my neck and hold on tight to me?” you asked.

He nodded and did so, but then lifted his head a little and said, “I love you khahar, thank you for coming back for me.”

Tears welled in your eyes, “I would burn the world for you Z… and I love you too kiddo.” you kissed his head again and then looked at Jack and took a breath, “We need to keep heading north, there should be a humvee about 20 to 30 yards from here, it’s the Captain's quarters and knowing the protocol, he got out via air support so his vehicle should still be here.”

Z nodded, “It is, I saw it when I was running, it’s there!”

Jack smiled towards Z, “This kid I’m sure comes in handy…”

You nodded and chuckled, “He’s my right-hand man, aren’t you Z?”

Z nodded proudly.

Jack chuckled and then opened the door and stepped out, clearing the area in front of you before you stepped out with Z.

You held his head down with one hand and whispered, “Head down, stay quiet. I got you.” he nodded and kept his head down.

You and Jack walked slowly and carefully through the area, making it to where you could see the abandoned vehicle within your view.

You and Jack walked slower than usual after seeing it, careful not to make too much noise as it was eerily quiet.

You made it to the Humvee and set Z down in the back seat, “Ok let’s get you buckled in little man.” you started to buckle him in. He smiled at you “Are we going to see Maria?” he asked as you buckled the belt.

You nodded, “Yeah, just a short car ride, easy and painless.” you moved back and smiled at him, feeling some relief this was close to being over, that you were able to get him to safety.

You stepped back a little and acted like a roller coaster operator, “Thank you for choosing to ride with us today, here at Delta 30 we ask that you please keep your hands and feet inside the cabin at all times!” you did the little gesture they all do to when they explain this at theme parks, then you did a cheesy smile “Thank you again for choosing us, and please enjoy the ride…” you said in a silly voice, making him giggle, you smiled brightly hearing his laugh.

Jack chuckled at your performance and hopped in the driver's seat and pulled down the sunshade, “Shit. No keys…” he looked back at you, wondering what to do.

You looked at him, “Inside, they’ve got to be inside, he has them hanging on the wall in his office… I’ll go grab them, stay with Z.” you grabbed your rifle around your front again and stepped into the building, your heart racing, breathing sharp and fast, anxiety through the roof.

Lights were buzzing on and off, and rubble was everywhere, you walked slowly and cleared every blind spot. You slowly made it through the first floor, clearing the rooms, and walking up the first flight of stairs carefully. You walked down the hall and held your breath, careful to be quick but quiet.

You finally made it to the office and saw the keys, you reached and grabbed them “Bingo!” you started heading out of the office when you heard ‘pop, pop, pop’, gunshots.

You ran out as quick as you could, gun pointed forward, breathing fast and hard. You came out to Jack wrestling with two men, another on the ground, dead. You went to shoot at one of them to help Jack when you felt someone's arms around your throat from behind you, pulling you back, putting you in a chokehold.

You gasped for air, but then let go of your rifle to hang around your neck and reached to your side holster to grab your knife as quickly as you could, fighting to stay standing as the person was trying to take you to the ground. You finally grabbed it from your holster and you reached back and stabbed your assailant in the side of the leg and then headbutted him in the face, pulling the knife out in the process of trying to get away. He screamed in pain and let go of you to grab his leg. You turned and went to stab him again but he was faster and punched you in the jaw, knocking you off balance backwards.

You heard two more gunshots behind you.

“Z! Get down!” you shouted, not seeing where he was but did so out of instinct.

You regain your balance and put your fists up, holding the knife in your dominant hand to use as well. Your attacker stands up straight and pulls a knife out as well from a holster behind his back and grins sinisterly.

You readjust your knife for hand-to-hand combat. You let out a breath to calm yourself down roll your shoulders backward and your head side to side. You then square up your fists and take a step forward, he does the same and swings his fist toward you. You duck backward and to the side to dodge, and then take a swing yourself to his face, hitting him across the face, leaving a good slice across his cheek as your knife makes contact with your fist.

He recklessly swings again toward you with just his fist and you block it by putting your arm up and then grabbing that arm and twisting it outward, and landing a hard hit to his most likely already broken nose. He yells in pain and then goes to stab you in the side but you block that by moving your knife to block it, which goes through his wrist. You then grab his wrist with your knife still in his arm, bring his arms together to incapacitate him, and then step back and kick him in the chest away from you.

He stumbled back and then yelled loudly as he was mad he was being bested. He looked at you and spat in your direction, calling you a bitch in Dari, and then moved forward to kick you, you grabbed his foot and held him there grinned back at him, calling him ‘Khar Kuss’, which meant donkey fucker.

He looked at you shocked which distracted him enough to take your knife from his wrist that was holding his leg to get away from you, stab him in his kneecap, and twist the knife. You then pulled him in quickly towards you, aiming the knife at his chest. He gasped and you whispered in his ear, “Bay pathar” (bastard) and pulled the knife out, letting him fall to the ground.

You were panting, adrenaline high, making you buzz.

You turned back hearing grunting to find Jack still wrestling with someone, being pinned to the ground, the knife being pushed to his throat, him pushing against it.

You pulled up your rifle and shot the person in the head, making him fall to the side of Jack. You were both of our breath and on edge, Jack sat up on his elbows and looked your way, “Took ya long enough!” he held his throat.

You chuckled manically, “Sorry, I was dealing with my own battle with death, princess!” you pointed to the dead body near you.

You shook your head and chuckled at him rolling his eyes at you.

You came over and held out your hand to help him up. He grabbed your hand and laughed finally as he stood.

You both took a second and calmed your breathing, you leaned over with your hands on your knees. That’s when you heard coughing and gasping from behind you, you could swear your heart stopped for a moment realizing it was Z.

You quickly turned around and found him in the back of the vehicle bleeding from his chest and stomach, holding his stomach and slumped in his seat.

“No, no, no.. no! Fuck!” you ran and unbuckled him, eyes wide, there was so much blood.

You quickly grabbed him and he fought against you in pain, “It’s ok, it’s ok, Z, it’s me… I know it hurts, please… I need to help you sweetheart.” you quickly grabbed him and laid him on the ground flat, he started shaking and gasping softly.

“Jack? Jack help me!” you frantically took off your gloves and started to put your hands over his stomach to put pressure on the bleeding.

Jack looked at Z’s body, defeated, he knew this wasn’t something you could stop, “Y/N he… he’s lost too much blood, he’s not going to make it.”

“No… No!” you shouted, pulling gauze out of your pouch with one hand while the other stayed on his stomach. You were angry because you knew deep down he was right, “Fuck you! You said the same about Maria, and she was fine!” you began to sob, packing, trying to stop the bleeding but it just kept coming, Z put his hands on yours like he was telling you to stop.

You looked at Z’s face, his breathing was sharp and fast, and he had tears stained on his cheeks. Blood was starting to come from his mouth most likely his chest wound. Then he started closing his eyes, “No.. no Z don’t close your eyes, Z look at me, keep your eyes on me.” you moved closer to him and touched his face gently, hands shaking, “Z eyes open…” and then brought him into your lap and sobbed, “Z, look at me, eyes on me baby boy… please…” you hold on to his head, pleading with him to wake up.

He opened his eyes and swallowed softly, “I’ll be ok khahar… I’m going to my papa and mama up in the clouds...” he said in between breaths with a small smile, tears falling down the sides of his face, looking up at you.

You shook your head and tears streamed down your face, and your lips quivered, you held him close and rocked him back and forth keeping a hand on his cheek, keeping your eyes on him, “Z, you’re ok, stay with me… please...” you then brought him into your embrace and hugged him so lovingly, one arm around his tiny body, one hand holding the back of his head, gripped onto him, humming that song you and Maria did for him when you met him, continuing to rock back and forth, trying comfort him, you felt his body go limp after a couple minutes.

You pulled him back from your embrace and looked at him, tears falling onto him, your voice breaking, “Z…?” you looked for any reaction, eyes searching, scanning every part of his for movement.

His eyes were looking up to the heavens, you put your hand on his cheek, it was cold, then you put your finger on his pulse point, and you felt nothing.

You bowed your head to touch his forehead softly sobbing and then cried out a heartbreaking moan.

You started rocking him back and forth, holding his lifeless body in your arms, shaking as you sobbed, frantically trying to hold him tighter to you.

Jack put a hand on your shoulder, to comfort you, letting you have a moment to grieve.

You sobbed and whispered to him, “I’m so sorry Z… I’m so so sorry…” over and over again into his hair, closing your eyes, kissing his head over and over again, cradling him as you continued to sob.

A few moments went by and Jack heard some gunshots nearby and knelt beside you, “We need to go… Y/N, you need to let him go.” he started to pry your arms off of Z.

“Jack… stop please…please…” you pushed him away, tears running down your face as you clung to him, wanting more time.

He was gentle but kept persisting, slowly prying you off Z, “Y/N he’s gone. We need to go, we are in danger. We need to go home…” He paused to gather himself, “Z… he’s with his family now… you need to let go… come with me.” he started to get teared up seeing your heartbreak, “Y/N… come with me, let’s go to Maria… to Joel…” he said softly trying to say anything to help you let go.

You heard two more gunshots and knew it was time. You took a deep breath, closed your eyes one last time, and whispered into his skin, “Doostetaan daaram (I love you) Azzami. I promise I will see you again Z.” then you kissed Z’s forehead softly.

You reluctantly let go of Z’s body and Jack dragged you away from his body, as you sobbed uncontrollably as he walked you to the car, gently saying, “I know… shh shh… I know… it’s hard… I know. He’s safe now, he’s at peace.” he hugged you tightly, you gripped onto him for dear life, sobbing into his vest.

He put you into the car and shut the door. You looked at him one last time from your seat. “Wait, his eyes, close his eyes!” you said, voice breaking.

Jack went over to his body and knelt by him, closing his eyes with his hand, and then stroked his head gently before standing and coming around to the driver’s side, starting the vehicle up.

No matter how hard you tried, Z still died in the middle of the street. Just like the other children that you attempted so hard to evade becoming his fate.

Once you and Jack got out of the north gate, Jack turned to you, you were looking down at your hands, they were covered in Z’s blood, your mind was going through everything that happened the last 10 minutes, where you went wrong to make this happen.

“You wanna radio Maria? Let her know we are on our way?” he tried pulling from where he knew your mind was.

You looked at him and then back at your hands, “I…Jack, I don’t know what I’m going to tell her. We… Z, he… we were all family, how do I say he’s dead?” you swallowed a lump in your throat.

He looked at the road, “You don’t do it over the radio. You do when you are together and can grieve together. Just… just say you’re on your way. We should be there in less than 10 minutes.” he said, softly and trying to suggest something that might help you with what you’re battling with internally.

You didn’t say anything, you just kept staring at your hands.

“It wasn’t your fault. It was no one’s fault. It just happened and there wasn’t anything we could do. We did everything we could to protect him. They… those men came out of nowhere, even I didn’t see them until they grabbed me.” He sighed. “If you’re blaming yourself, don’t. You couldn’t have stopped his fate.” he said and put a hand on yours, trying to offer comfort.

You looked at him and gripped his hand, “I just… I feel so numb.”

“It will go away. You’ll move on, and instead, hold him in your heart.” he said then swallowed, “I lost my partner in no man's land the first time I went. He… he was my Z. Like a little brother to me.” he gripped the steering wheel, tears welling up, “I found him with a hole in his chest, there was nothing anyone could do… so I just sat there and held his hand, told him I’d watch over his wife and son, and that they’d be ok.” he cleared his throat as tears fell down his cheeks. “Not a day goes by that I don’t think about him.” he pulled out some dog tags from under his vest, “I carry him everywhere I go, and it helps…” he looked over at you, “I saw you both had those bracelets on… keep yours, wear it every day. It’ll be your part of him.”

You looked at your wrist and touched the bracelet you had on your wrist, let out a shaky breath, and then nodded. “Thanks for that Jack… I needed that.” you looked over at him and sadly smiled. “What was his name?” you nodded to his tags.

“Ironically, his name was Zachary.” he chuckled sadly.

You smiled sadly, “Our Z’s” You squeezed his hand again.

You both looked at each other and nodded together before you continued driving.

Maria’s POV

It had been over 2 hours since she had heard from you. Joel and Tommy stayed on the Skype call with her, Reggie knew the importance and found a way to plug in the power cord somewhere nearby.

She got to know Joel and Sarah more. The four of them found comfort in each other while they waited together.

“I can’t believe she took those pictures! I look like a troll in that one!” Maria laughed as Joel showed her some of the photos that were developed from your disposable camera.

“I think you look like a cute troll…” Tommy took the photo from Joel and smiled at it.

“I don’t know if I should be offended or not by that…” Maria chuckled.

Tommy, Joel, and Sarah all chuckled together at that comment.

“Delta 27, this is Delta 30, do you copy?” you came on the radio but it was going in and out.

Maria grabbed it off the table and fiddled with it then called back, “This is Delta 27, is this Delta 30? Over.”

There was static for a few seconds then you came on again, much clearer, “This is Delta 30, be advised we are 5 minutes out from location. Over and out.”

Everyone breathed a sigh of relief, Joel chuckled with tears in his eyes, and Sarah hugged his side, tearing up too.

“Delta 30, this is Delta 27, do you have Z? Can I talk to him? Over.” Maria asked, tears streaming down her face, smiling.

Static.

“Delta 30, do you copy?” Maria asked.

Static.

She looked at the radio and then looked at one of the soldiers next to her, “Hey, do you guys have a bad radio connection between Delta 27 and 30?”

He looked at her, “Depends on what road, if it's off-road, it can cause issues.” he shrugged.

Maria nodded, her face showing concern.

Tommy saw and softly spoke up, “Maybe it’s just a bad area? Their first response came in spotty, I bet they are ok…” he smiled softly.

Maria nodded and took a breath. She put the radio down and then kept her eyes on the entrance gate.

Less than 5 minutes later she saw Jack come through the gate and then you, you were covered in blood, but no Z.

“Where’s Z?” she questioned, not connecting the dots yet then it hit her, realizing who’s blood that was.

Her face fell and tears welled up, she shook her head in disbelief.

“Maria, what’s going on? What’s happening?” Tommy asked seeing her face.

“Jack! Y/N! Over here!” she shouted and started waving her hand to signal you over.

You turned her way stopped in your tracks and caught her eyes. She mouthed ‘Z?’ to which you sadly shook your head.

She put the laptop on the table next to her and held her stomach as she sobbed, “No… please no!” she cried.

Reggie heard and came over, “Maria? What’s wrong? What happened?”

“No! Not Z!” she shouted and held her hand over her mouth.

Tommy instantly put it together, he looked at Joel and shook his head, “Z did make it…”

Joel knew this would crush you, this wasn’t just some random person, this was your Z. If he hadn’t known, you could have been a mother to him with how you took care of him.

You and Jack began running over to her area. You had no idea Tommy, Joel, or Sarah were on the laptop, listening or watching.

You took off your helmet and rifle near the bed and came up to her bedside, then pulled her into your embrace, hugging her so tightly.

Joel saw you partially in the camera’s view. Relief flooded every atom in him, you were truly ok, you were safe.

Sarah, Tommy, and Joel all stayed quiet, they knew you both were going to be crushed by this.

You cradled her head with your hand and tears fell down your face as she sobbed, “I’m so sorry… Maria, I’m sorry.” you held onto her until she slowed down her breathing.

You then pulled back, knelt by her bed, and swallowed down the emotion that was threatening up and out. You took her hand, took a deep breath, and looked up at her and Reggie who sat beside her, you started slow and spoke softly, “It was an ambush. Z had an injured ankle. He was in Reggie’s bunkhouse. He couldn’t even get away if he tried…” you sighed and looked down at the ground for a moment, “We went to go get Captain’s car, Z said it had been left behind. So when we got there… I buckled him in.. made sure he was safe and ready to go…” your voice cracked. You let out a breath before continuing, looking back up at them. “I went in to get keys for the Humvee but heard 3 gunshots on my way out.” your hand started to shake remembering details, Maria held your hand tighter.

Your breathing became shaky and quick, “I came out, two men were on Jack, one was already on the ground dead, but then before I could get to Z…” you looked at Maria and her only, “I… someone came behind me and put me in a chokehold…” you sighed and looked down ashamed, “I heard two more gunshots, I… I told Z to get down… but I was at knifepoint… I… I couldn’t get to him…” You looked up at her and Reggie, they both realized that was most likely the moment he got shot and put their heads down to quietly cry. You took a breath and then clenched your jaw, trying to hold it together, your tone changed, and there was slight anger in your tone, “I… I took care of my attacker, and then turned and saw someone was on Jack… so I shot them too. I…I have no idea how long Z was down.” you explained, and looked down and let tears fall on the ground, feeling ashamed and responsible deep down.

Jack piped in as he stepped forward, “I was pulled out of the vehicle by the first man who was dead on the ground, then the other two were on me like flies on shit. I couldn’t see Z for a long time. I don’t know if the first three got him or the last two that got ‘em. I… we… we did everything… Y/N did everything the second we saw him.” he said as he looked down at you and then back up at Maria and Reggie, wiping a tear from his cheek.

You nodded and looked at her and swallowed the lump in your throat, “He had chest and abdominal wound, he bled out… I…” you looked down and choked up, “I tried everything, but it was too late… there was so much… blood… he…” you cleared your throat and looked up at her, tears falling, “He died in my arms… I uhm… hummed that song we sang to him when we first met him… so he uh…” you chuckled through a sob. “He died knowing we loved him.”

Maria chuckled with you and smiled at the comfort that would have brought him in that final moment, “Oh Z…”

“He told me he was going to be with his mom and dad in the clouds…” you sadly said as you looked down starting to breathe faster, a sob starting to escalate, the emotions that you had shoved down erupting, “Fuck…” you chuckled and looked back at her, “He had no fear. He wasn’t scared. He…” Your knee began bouncing, and you could feel it all pushing to burst, so you stood and turned around to regain composure and had your fists clenched at your sides, your leg shaking to ground you, “Fuck… Fuck…” You looked to the sky and then closed your eyes and took a breath, opening your eyes back up, but then looked down and saw your hands, bloodied and shaking.

“Y/N… take a second…” Jack said, softly reaching for you. You reacted when he touched you and shoved him away, “No… I don’t…” you pointed at him, and then let out a shaky breath, angry at yourself, you felt overwhelmed, and overstimulated, everything became too much. So you looked around for anything to take your emotions out on. You saw a table next to you with medical instruments on it. You pushed it over angrily, and then winced and grabbed your hand, “God damn it!” you saw your cut your hand on something sharp, blood pouring out of your palm, you were huffing angrily when then as you saw the blood pour it melted into a sob. You dropped to your knees and cradled your hand to your chest.

Reggie immediately ran over and knelt to hug you, he held onto you tightly, “Hey, let’s get you cleaned up, yeah? Get that stitched up and those hands washed.” he pulled away and tried to look at you, touching your cheek, but your eyes were not with him all the way, you started to disassociate and you stared into the distance with tears rushing down your face.

He looked at Maria behind you, worry sketched across his face, Joel saw and unmuted the mic, and he spoke up softly, “Baby, can you hear me?”

You sprang to stand up and turned around and for a second you thought he was there, you began frantically looking around, “Joel?”

Maria pulled the laptop over into her lap and reached over to gently touch your arm, “Hey… right here…”

You looked down and instantly knelt back by Maria and touched the computer screen, “Joel…” you looked and saw Sarah, you chuckled, “Sarah… I’m so happy to see you.” you smiled as tears streamed down your face. You looked and laughed softly, “Hey Tommy!” you needed this, you needed them.

“Hey hey, you got it right this time!” Tommy teased.

You smiled softly, and then looked at Maria, “Have you…” you looked back down at the computer, “Have you all been waiting online?”

Joel smiled softly and nodded, “Of course darlin’… we’ve all been prayin’ for you to make it back.” he wiped some tears on the back of his hand, “I’m so sorry to hear about Z… what can I do?” he asked sincerely.

“Unless you can discharge me, and send me home to you guys…” you chuckled sadly, “Just be here, stay here.”

He nodded and smiled lovingly, “I’m not goin’ anywhere.”

Reggie, knelt by you, “I need to take care of your hand… can I just pull you away for 5 minutes?” he said softly with the most sincere intent.

You looked at your hand and then Joel and the group, “I’ll uh… I’ll be right back, I promise.” you chuckled to yourself as you walked away.

Joel and Tommy let out a chuckle and nodded, “Good one!” Tommy shouted.

You stood and followed Reggie. He took you to wash Z’s blood off your hands and then gently took care of your hand, stitching it up and then wrapping it.

He looked at you as you sat in front of him, eyes going through everything you’d been through and seen these last few days, he softly spoke up, “I know you couldn’t have done anything to save Z… but you did a lot more than you’ll give yourself credit for… you gave him comfort and that’s all anyone can ask for in their final moments.” he softly smiled and then hugged you tightly when you made eye contact with him. “I’m glad you’re safe, and thank you for coming to get me...” he said as he hugged you.

You pulled back and smiled softly at him, “I would have turned every stone in that camp to find you, Reggie.”

He nodded and tears fell down his cheeks, “I know you would have. You are someone who doesn’t give up on family. That’s why I think of you like a big sister. You’ve always been the one to protect us, and take care of everyone...” he took your hand gently, “I don’t have family back home, you and Maria and…Z… you are my family.”

You nodded, put your forehead against his, and looked at him, “I love ya, Reggie.”

He chuckled and put his hand on your shoulder, “I love ya too…”

—

After you got done with Reggie you sat with Maria and talked with Joel, Sarah, and Tommy for about an hour, slowly opening back up.

You saw Maria yawn and then Joel and Tommy as well. Sarah had already passed out on the couch nearby. You looked at the time and then smiled, “Alright, I think we all could use some rest. Plus it’s past your bedtime boys…” you chuckled standing up and stretching.

Joel shook his head, “I’m ok baby, I want to talk to you longer…” he looked at you with those big brown eyes, “Please?”

You huffed as you released your stretch and chuckled, “No, no… you don’t get to use those now mister brown eyes.”

“5 more minutes?” he asked kindly.

Maria looked at you and smiled tiredly, “You can take the laptop… I’m gonna get some sleep, I’ve been dozing off for the last 20 minutes…” She chuckled.

Tommy smiled and yawned, “Me too, I’m gonna go get some rest in the guest room. I’ll talk to you later babe.” he smiled at Maria.

She smiled and nodded, dozing off pretty quickly.

You took the laptop and carried it with you to a little area away from all the commotion, down a quiet alleyway “Can you still hear me?”

Joel had taken the laptop upstairs to his room as well while you were walking, “Yeah, I can hear you darlin’…”

You smiled and then sat down and sat the laptop down on the floor in front of you, “I need to take this off, sorry, one sec.” you started taking off the heavy vest you had on and your jacket, feeling overstimulated by it, leaving you in a dark green tank top.

Joel saw your arm and winced seeing the blood that had seeped through, “Oh baby, is that from when you and Maria were attacked earlier?” he looked at the screen a little closer.

You looked at it and nodded, “Yeah… at some point, I need to get this and my leg looked at...” You looked at your pouch and pulled out some tape, “I’m just gonna tape it up, that way I can get a nap in, and then I can worry about it later...” you smiled at him, “Hey uh… I wanted to apologize for stressin’ you out the last few days. I know it has been hard and I just, I know I don’t have anything to apologize for, but still…” as you spoke you taped your arm up and then pouted your bottom lip out to concentrate while you finished as it was a weird angle.

“You know it’s real hard to listen to a word you’re sayin’ when you're doin’ that lip pout thing…” he lovingly looked at you like you hung the moon and stars.

“What lip pout thing?” you looked at him confused.

“You know, the thing you do when you’re concentratin’, you know, this?” he mimicked it.

You giggled softly, “You’re kidding me, I do not do that!”

He grinned, “Darlin’, you do and when you’re thinkin’ real hard you do this nose scrunch thing too…” he chuckled.

You pursed your lips and shook your head, trying not to smile, “Nope, I don’t believe it.”

Joel bit his lip, and shook his head, looking at you adoringly.

“What? What are you looking at and shaking your head about there handsome…” you smiled at him, teasing him.

“I’m just thinkin’ how I can’t wait for the day where I don’t have to wait to kiss you when you do something that reminds me of why I love you…” he said like he was committing a vow to you. He meant every word.

You blushed madly and looked down, smiling widely, speechless.

“For example, if I was with you, I’d gently grab your chin and pull you up to look at me with that big beautiful smile I know you’re wearin’ right now…” he wets his bottom lip, “I’d then cradle your cheeks with my hands and look into your eyes. I’d memorize every hugh of color in them, look over every detail of your breathtaking face, every freckle, dimple, scar. I’d make the world stop for you.” he stopped and you looked up at him with so much love and adoration in your smile.

He smiled right back at you, “Then I’d bring you to my lips slowly, and kiss you with every fiber of my being…” he shyly looked down for a second, “Then I’d hold you close to me, while the world belonged to just you and I for that time.” he looked back up into your eyes.

You teared up and couldn’t help the smile on your face, but you didn’t shy away from him, you just stayed in that moment where the two of you just felt utter devotion and love for each other.

“Where have you been all my life, cowboy?” you said softly, shyly pulling your knees up to your chest and putting your face in your arms to look at him.

“Waiting right here, it’s always been you…” he said smiling softly, eyes dancing around your features.

You smiled behind your arms brightly, “As it’s always been you for me...”

Joel sighed contently and then a yawn betrayed him, and your eyes widened, and you gasped, pointing at him, “Ah ha! You are tired!” you teased.

Joel raised an eyebrow and chuckled, covering his mouth, “How are you not? How long have you been up?”

You looked at your watch and then did the math in your head, your nose doing that scrunchy thing he referred to earlier, “That! You do that!” he shouted, pointing at you.

You giggled and looked at him, “What? I do what?”

“The thing with your nose, you just did it!” he laughed softly.

“Cowboy I think you’re a little tired.. you’re seein’ things…” you teased.

He chuckled lowly and smirked, “Oh that’s not fair, no… baby I know what I saw…”

You shrugged and nodded slowly, “Ok honey, you saw it.” you mocked him, biting your lip, loving getting a rise out of him.

He bit his lip, devilish thoughts clouded his mind of what he wanted to do with you at this moment with how you were teasing him, he smirked at you.

You bit your lip and cocked your head, watching him, “And now you’re thinkin’ of some not-so-family-friendly thoughts cowboy… you naughty boy.” you grinned and tsked him.

“Wouldn’t you like to know…” he licked his bottom lip, and pumped his hips up, his cock starting to get hard by the banter.

You leaned in closer and said lowly, “I’d sure as hell like to be shown…”

He let a shaky breath out and swallowed hard, his cock now hard and pressing against his boxers painfully.

You bit your lip again and looked down, “Now, I’m no fortune teller, but judgin’ by your lack of speech, I’m gonna just go ahead and assume that if I was there, you and that cock of yours would like to show me a thing or two right now with how I’m actin’, isn’t that right cowboy?” then looked back up and met his gaze, smirking.

Joel's throat went dry and he just slowly grinned. He liked this side of you, it was sexy as hell.

He swallowed and cleared his throat, and sat up a bit, cocking his head to the side and tilting it up a little to challenge you back. He said lowly, stretching out every word with his drawl, every syllable, bewitching you, “Oh baby, you have no idea of the things I wanna do to you… passionately… slowly… taking every… little… moan from your lips and drinkin’ it down like whiskey…” he looked you up and down with his eyes, and then bit his lip and continued to grin, “I wanna get drunk off you and that pretty little pussy you have.”

You ran your tongue against the back of your top molars, thinking, grinning, raising an eyebrow at him, blushing brightly, feeling bold, knowing this was hurting him more than you, knowing you were being a tease, “You’d like that wouldn’t you, hearing me moan and fall apart on that cock of yours, cowboy? Beggin’... pleadin’... calling your name into your ear, as you’d claim me with each thrust…”

His breathing became quick and uneven, he reached down to palm himself through his boxers.

“Mmm, I think we’re past our five minutes cowboy…” you teased.

“Baby, please…” he groaned, looking at you with those big brown eyes, pleading.

You looked up and saw you were in a pretty public area still, you pulled out your headphones from your bag and plugged them in, then looked at him, biting your lip, “You’ve got 3 minutes baby, tell me what you’d need if I was in that lap of yours right now…”

He reached a hand inside his boxers and grunted, his head falling back against the bedframe, eyes fluttering as he let out a groan as he began to stroke himself, “Fuck, baby…” he looked back at you, eyes full of lust, “If you were in my lap… I’d have you wrap your legs around me, while we sat on the bed, and I’d support your back with my arm while tilting you ba-” he whined and tilted his head back again, “Oh fuck…”

You grinned, biting your lip, you couldn’t touch yourself where you were but you’d be using these sweet sounds he has using later to your advantage. “Baby, tell me more…” you purposely made yourself sound breathy, in an attempt to fuel his fire.

“I’d tilt you back just a tad darlin’... just to get that sweet spot I know will make you see stars… gripping my free hand into your soft and delicious hip to hold you where I want ya…” he grinned, speaking in a lower-toned voice, “I’d feed you my cock nice and slow at first, dragging it in and out, swallowing every moan you’d pleasure me with.” he tightened his jaw and swallowed a moan down, “Oh fuck, you’d feel so good around me, god I want you so bad baby…” he preached, stroking himself a bit faster.

You enjoyed watching him fall apart, crumbling just thinking about you on top of him a little too much. You could feel how drenched your panties were and the pressure they were creating against your clit was starting to become unbearable.

“I want you so much cowboy, come for me. Tell me how you’d come, baby…” you pleaded, asking softly.

He leaned his head back again and shut his eyes, imagining you instead of his hand, panting quickly and excited, “Oh god, I’d make you cum at least once, more if I could hold on long enough…” he grinned, “I… I’d put my hand between our bodies and rub lazy circles on your clit while I fucked up into your sweet, tight pussy… I… ohhh… f-fuck…” he groaned loudly. “I’d pull an orgasm from you and tell you how good you’re taking me, how you’re such a good girl for taking my cock… I’d want to suck love bites into your skin, whispering love poems as I trailed my lips along your body…. and I’d… I….” he swallowed and tried to hold on, “I’d tell you that I love you and that I worship you and that I’m yours, fully, every part of me is yours baby… that….” his breathing became quicker as he rambled, “I… fu-fuck…” he stuttered as he felt the pull of a climax approaching.

You interrupted and said slowly and softly, “I’d tell you that I’m yours and that I love you more than you know… I’d drag my fingers through your hair while saying prayers of pleasure as my lips kissed against your neck, jaw, and earlobe, worshipping how you feel deep inside me…” you said starting to sound excited and breathy truly now yourself, “I’d want your lips on mine as you came in me, whispering to each other sweet nothings as we both came down from our highs, intoxicated by each other.” you said and saw him flex his jaw and keep his head back, eyes shut, and then moan your name as he came, out of breath, beginning to chuckle, he lifted his head and looked at you, grinning drunkenly.

You giggled, biting your lip shyly.

He swallowed and sat up to look at you better, “Just for the record, this will be the only time that I cum before you’ve had the chance to, you understand baby?” he panted, looking at you with eyes of lust, drunk on you and the thought of having you that way.

You nodded and grinned shyly, “Yes sir…”

He swallowed hard and shook his head before he bit his lip, “No baby, you can’t do that to me, you’ll get me goin’ again…” he chuckled, still out of breath.

You cocked your head, now curious, “Can’t do what…sir?” you bit your lip, smirking.

He pushed his hair back and tried to slow down his breathing, “Darlin’…” he smirked at you, “Please… not there… you do that when you’re here… when I can…” he shyly looked down a little, “when I can show you what that actually does to me… and can show you how good I can make you feel.” he looked at you and grinned before biting his bottom lip. You could tell he was thinking of what he’d do to you just by the way his eyes danced over yours.

You blushed a new shade of red and nodded, looking down shyly.

“Good. I uh… I’ll be right back baby, I need to clean up.” he went to get up but you stopped him. “As much I am thoroughly enjoying this, I need to get some rest, and so do you. Can I call you sometime tomorrow, I promise not to run off on some stupid dangerous assignment again.” you chuckled and rolled your eyes.

He smiled softly at you and nodded, “Yes. Let’s do that darlin’, just message me when you wake up, yeah?”

You nodded and let out a yawn.

“There we go!” he exclaimed.

You giggled and tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear, “I love you, cowboy…”

He smiled and looked at you for a few seconds, taking you in, “I love you darlin’...”

You charged your laptop when you were given a bunkhouse to share with Reggie, and saw all the messages Joel had sent you when you were away. You read them all over and over, smiling and completely losing your mind over a select few:

‘I love you darlin’, but I need to say that to you with my arms around you, lips to yours. I need you here with me.’’

You would never get tired of hearing he loves you, and you would never tire of saying it to him. You couldn’t wait to be with him, you hated this distance now that you both confessed your feelings.

‘I want to spend the rest of my days with you, taking care of you, protecting you, loving you… please, I can’t lose you.’

You couldn’t wait for this either, you were hoping the days of being away from him were getting less and less. You didn’t know what the future held for you with Delta 30 falling just a couple of days ago but you secretly hoped it would send you home, even just for a short time.

‘One day, I’m gonna marry you. Spend the rest of my days trying to make you as happy as you make me.’

‘He’s going to marry me. I’m going to marry him. God, he wants to be my husband, and I get to be his wife.’ you told yourself as you beamed, kicking your feet in your bed as you read that one over and over maybe 100 times.

These things, where he wanted to include you in his life, with Sarah, made your heart swell and made you fall deeper for him. The way he described every detail of what he wanted with you, you knew you found the one.

You couldn’t help but imagine what you’d wear… hell what he’d wear and how you’d both have the hardest time keeping your hands off each other all night. You thought about this scenario often, especially late at night when you’d moan his name into the darkness.

He remembered you liked Taylor Swift after a mention of you saying you liked one of her songs weeks ago, which led to you saying you’d love to go to one of her concerts, but you felt they were so expensive and never had the time or money to do that for yourself. He remembered, and not only that, he was actively learning and engaging so that when he would go with you, he would enjoy it with you both too.

‘...we can star gaze and I can wrap you in my arms and hold you while you watch the universe above us, while I hold mine.’ You wanted that tattooed on your forehead. The poetry of that last line made you want to jump and dance for joy. For which you did… to ‘Mine’ and ‘Love Story’ by Taylor Swift on repeat for the next two days.

—

You kept your promise and you and Joel Skype called the next day for 4 hours, you both fell asleep with the laptops in each other's beds, Joel fell asleep due to it being nighttime for him, and you fell asleep due to exhaustion.

When you woke up a few hours later you saw him fast asleep, peacefully asleep, you just laid there, pretending for just a few moments you were next to him, able to touch his cheek, gently stroke your fingers through his hair, and whisper to him how much you love him and you are so grateful for him while he rested.

You kept the video chat on for as long as one of your batteries allowed, and when you woke up again a few more hours later your laptop was dead but for a short little while it felt real, being next to him while you both slept.

5 days later

You helped around the med tent as much as they allowed you to. Since coming back from no man’s land, they were very insistent that you rested and took things easy but sitting still was hard for you when you saw work to be done.

You were helping resuscitate a young man when your commanding officer came over and looked at you, “Y/N, when you are finished here, will you come to my office and have a word with me?”

You looked up at him and nodded, “Yes sir.” you continued to do some CPR for a few more minutes before declaring there was too much time his brain had been without oxygen and called it a time of death.

You cleaned your hands up and then went over to Maria’s bunk quickly, “Hey, Sarge just called me into his office, do you know what for?” you asked, anxious by the out-of-pocket request.

Maria shrugged and shook her head, “No… I mean… maybe because I’m leaving tomorrow he’s letting you know your reassignment? I’m not sure… but I’m sure everything will be ok.” she softly smiled up at you.

You nodded and began walking the way to his office.

‘There’s no way they are sending me out again on a field assignment, I have no partner, and I’m still recovering.’ you anxiously told yourself, trying to convince yourself this was just a check-in, he had to just be checking in, right? They wouldn’t be that cruel to send you back out… right?

You opened the door to the building his office was in and instantly your heart began to race, anxiety building.

You walked up to his office door and took a deep breath and then lightly knocked on his door. “Sir? It’s Specialist Y/N…” you said softly, swallowing down your nerves.

“Ah yes, please come in Specialist…” he said with a bellowing voice.

You twisted the knob and then came in, and shut the door behind you then stood to attention, saluting him.

“At ease…” he said standing up from his desk. “Please, sit…”

You let out a shaky breath and quickly moved to sit down, you looked at him with your hands in your lap, “Thank you, sir.”

He smiled tightly, “I wanted to talk to you about your future here.” he began.

You instantly began picking at your cuticles, nervous about what lay ahead for you.

“I know your partner Specialist Maria Atkinson will be leaving tomorrow and before her, your other teammate Specialist Terrence Johanson left us… all because of your sacrifice.”

You looked at him, confused, “Sir? I-I’m sorry?”

“Well, both are alive because of you and a sacrifice you made when their lives were in danger.” he stood from his chair, “You went into active combat zones, shots firing at you, putting your life on the line to pull them to safety. Specialist, without you, they would most likely be having their families mourning their deaths…” he said as he rounded his desk and sat on the end of it, keeping eye contact with you the whole time.

“Sir, I was only doing my job.” you straightened up a little, “My job is to save lives, I didn’t… I didn’t do anything special. I… sir, I did what I did because they were lives needin’ to be saved, they were in danger, hurt, and needed help.” you said with tears in your eyes, “I… mean, yes, I made promises to each to get them and their families… to get them back home safely…” you shrugged, “I’d like to believe I’m a man of my word, but I didn’t do anythin’... heroic?” you said honestly.

He nodded and folded his arms, “I have also been told by Agent Coleman that you were an integral part in getting Captain Williams out of Delta 42 safely, in fact, he said that without your quick thinking and planning, the group wouldn’t have made it out.” he looked down at you.

You swallowed, and your foot started to anxiously tap, “Sir, again, I was just doing my job. Our assignment was to get him out, that’s what I did.” you looked at him, confused as to why he was bringing all this up.

“Specialist, did you also not put yourself back in harm's way to go back into Delta 30 to pull out your fellow medic Specialist Reginald Mackey and the child we knew as Z?” he asked.

You stiffened up at the mention of Z, tears formed in your eyes, and you looked away from him and at a statue on his desk to focus on something, not on the loss of Z, you swallowed the lump in your throat, “Yes sir I did.”

He nodded and stood up from sitting on the desk, “I’ve been told that as you were getting into the plane as you were leaving Delta 42… you were struck by enemy fire in your leg, affecting your ability to walk, is that true?”

You looked up at him, confused by the line of questioning, “Yes sir but it-”

He cut you off, “Thank you for the confirmation Specialist.”

You looked at him and was so fucking confused, what the hell is happening.

“Please stand Specialist Y/N.” he turned around to grab something on his desk.

You stood from your chair and kept your hands to your side, letting out an anxious breath, eyes front.

He turned around and took your specialist patches off your uniform, “On behalf of the United States of America and the United States Army, we thank you for your service and sacrifice. You are hereby promoted and shall be given the respect and command of Sargent.” he replaces it with Sargent patches on your shoulder and chest. “Due to your acts of service and sacrifice in the rescue and retrieval of Specialist Atkinson and Specialist Johanson, attempted rescue of Specialist Mackey which put your life on the line when it wasn’t a command or assignment- as well as in the rescue mission of Army Commander Williams from Delta 42, resulting in medical injury, you are hereby medically discharged and will return home to North Carolina in three days at 0900 hours.” he handed held out an envelope for you to take with one hand and his hand to shake with the other.

You stood there in shock. “Sir?”

He smiled gently and grabbed your right hand, shaking it, and putting the other hand on your shoulder, “You’re going home, soldier.”

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Taglist: @sarahhxx03, @blahkateisdone, @sunnytuliptime, @pedroscurls, @docharleythegeekqueen

A/N: i sobbed writing this one, uncontrollably at one point, and was also kicking my feet, giggling and squealing... i hope you enjoy it as much as i loved writing it 🖤

#joel miller fanfiction #joel x reader #joel miller #joel miller fic #joel miller series #pedro pascal #joel miller smut #pedro pascal character fanfiction #pedro pascal joel miller #pedrohub #the last of us hbo #the last of us #joel tlou #tlou hbo #with all my love

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