#executive shutdown

[dougielombax]

When I made those remarks about Executive Shutdown I should’ve probably made it clear that I was FUCKING JOKING!!!!!

Jesus Christ these fuckers really are predictable!!!

Like FUCKING clockwork!

Bruh thinks he’s Tony Stark?

He’s more like a discount Thomas Edison.

At best.

This is LITERALLY the plot of Executive Shutdown!

More or less…

[therevray]

Executive Shutdown moment

[ambientbroth]

Self Diagnosed Autism Entry 12

The previous entry wasn’t really self-dx related so count this as that!

My partner and I have a lot of petty arguments full of misunderstandings and frustrations. It usually ends with me in full meltdown but never ends the relationship. Time and time again it has shown me that it’s because we are not fully understanding each other.

My partner when stressed has mental processing issues making it hard for him to understand. Where I feel I over explain in a hamster wheel to my doom.

So we started making cue cards today! Today we worked on conflict resolution, active listening, opened ended questions. Next we will go through:

Meltdown protocols

Feeling cards

Laminated feeling wheel spectrum

Mad libs for details on situations (planned events, schedule related things) because I need ALL the details that way I can write it down like knowing how many people, where, time duration, etc.

I have them color coded together.

Green is conflict resolution

Circles are empathetic

Triangles are supporting

Squares are understanding

Stars are alone “trump” cards

I think this could help some people like us

The alone time backside has signs of a meltdown

The outcomes of conversation has: to be understood, to explain, for an apology

I feel that this will strengthen our relationship and friendship to better understand each other. I love him for wanting to learn with me.

[fitgothgirl]

Just had my 2nd therapy appointment. I really like my therapist. 😭 Since it wasn’t our first introductory appointment, I was talking more about how the last couple weeks have been in particular, and was getting into how I just can’t do shit even when I know what I want or need, i.e. executive dysfunction and then overwhelm-shutdown. She already said last time she was able to diagnose me with ADHD and could easily see I have it, and today she reiterated that and that she’s resolute about getting me on ADHD meds. She’s having the telehealth service reach to to me to schedule for that, which they were supposed to do after my first appointment and never did. She said if I get any pushback (always depends on the psychiatrist and their attitude toward ADHD) to just let her know and to not worry, she’ll fight for me and she’s in my corner, etc. I think it’s finally going to happen... 😩 

And besides that, she’s just so down to earth and nice and seems really knowledgeable. She says that she likes the way I think and that I “have a cool brain” lol. I’ve been really transparent with her too so that always helps. We’ve been talking about depression and weed and ADHD and self/body image all together and taking baby steps. (It was only the 2nd appointment after all.) I feel really comfortable with her.

I only have appointments every other week but I’m kinda wanting to bump it up to weekly, at least for now... We’ll see. I missed my appointment by accident last week so it was rescheduled to today, so my next appointment is already just over a week away, so at least I don’t have to wait for the next one.

[govtshutdown]

Here's the deal

H.R. 9747: Continuing Appropriations and Extensions Act, 2025

[juniper-in-peril]

Someone pour gasoline over me

I’ll light the match

I already feel like I’m on fire

[opencommunion]

incarcerated people are shutting down Alabama prisons and asking for your solidarity

Alabama prisons are the deadliest and most crowded prisons in the US. Their violence extends to gas chamber executions and illegal organ harvesting. The Alabama Department of Corrections (ADOC) is currently facing two federal lawsuits: one for enslaving Black detainees by denying them parole and leasing out their forced labor and another for targeting strike organizers. ADOC rakes in more than $450 million annually in profits from forced labor, and that's not including the profits incarcerated people generate for private corporations such as McDonald's and Raytheon. In response to these abuses, and in particular the horrific beating of six handcuffed detainees by Lt. Edmonds at Donaldson Prison on February 22nd, the Free Alabama Movement (FAM) has organized a minimum 90-day statewide prison shutdown/work stoppage. They are calling on supporters outside the prison walls to show solidarity. If you're located in or around Alabama, show up to the protest at St. Clair Prison in Springville, AL on Saturday March 2nd. For rideshare coordination contact the Tennessee Student Solidarity Network on IG or by email: tnstudentsolidaritynetwork@gmail.com "Outside support for us starts at the prisons. That's where we need people. Come to one of the protests, show your face, and tell us that you support us. That's how we know that you support us. Outside support is the first step." - FAM

Everyone in the US, call Donaldson Prison at (205) 436-3681 and ask them to fire Lt. Edmonds for his brutal violence against incarcerated people.

[chriswhodrawsstuff]

The Heebs

I overdid it yesterday, I had what neurotypical would probably describe as an easy day, even a relaxing one to many and yet here I am, shaking like a leaf with a mind full of intrusive thoughts. I left my flat at half nine in the morning and was back on my sofa at half three in the afternoon and about four of the hours in-between were spent sitting down and now I feel absolutely wiped out. I had…

[mooniemp3]

Kinda hate that when talking about autism being a disability, some people only focus on the sensory part and ignore every other trait that can be disabling, or minimize those. Autism isn't only about sensory issues and these are not the only thing that make us have difficulties and be disabled.

Communication difficulties, social difficulties, difficulties with emotional regulation, rigid thinking, executive dysfunction, etc, are also traits that can be very disabling, and cause meltdowns and shutdowns, btw.

Not saying that sensory issues are not important, they are but they are not the only thing that make autism a disability.

[dougielombax]

*Ron DeSantis disappears into the void while shrieking in terror on rollerskates*

A minor inconvenience.

He will NOT be missed.

Anyway.

[the-jade-palace]

Fin Fin on QEMU (Current Version - v2.2)

Fin Fin on QEMU is a project designed to create an easy to use way for anyone to play Fin Fin without the need for any complicated setup on modern operating systems. It is fully compatible with Windows 10 and 11, but will also work on any version after XP.

The version of the game used is a custom made translation that includes all 6 worlds in English. It has working microphone input, sound recording, and all associated features such as screenshots and the encyclopedia work as well.

Rather than using virtualization, this works through emulating an entire Windows 98 machine. To play it there's no need to install any hypervisors or set up a virtual machine, as everything is already set up, and ready to go.

The download link can be found here! (Hosted on MEGA)

Installation

The whole thing is portable, meaning nothing is actually "installed" and all the data is wherever you place the folder. This also means that if moved to another PC, all user data will still be present.

To run, all you need to do is extract the folder in the .zip to a location of your choosing, and then run one of the launchers.

Included are two launcher versions for the different QEMU display options, one that uses GTK and one that uses SDL. The only difference between the .bat script and the .exe versions is that a command window will be shown when using the .bat script.

Both have pros and cons, so I've included both to let the user decide which one they want to use.

SDL has broken window scaling and no mouse integration, but has a correctly stretched fullscreen. GTK has a stretched fullscreen mode, but has working mouse integration and window scaling. Basically if you want the game in fullscreen use SDL, otherwise use GTK. For a bit more info about these, checkout the 'Files' section under the 'Keep Reading'

Important Info

Before launching the main game, be sure to create a profile using 'New Contact', as the game will not run until doing so. When exiting the game use the shutdown option in Windows 98. Exiting through closing the window forcefully can possibly cause data loss/corruption. When using SDL, mouse and keyboard input will be captured. To release this, press 'Ctrl + Alt + G'. When using GTK, the menubar can be hidden or shown by pressing 'Ctrl + Alt + M'. To make the window fullscreen, press 'Ctrl + Alt + F'.

Sounds

Included are two "sound effect packs" for the in game sounds that play based on the number keys from 1-5.

By default, the game will use the sound effects from the 5 Worlds version, but you can swap out to the 6 worlds one by renaming the "sound (alternate)" folder in the D: drive to just "sound", and renaming the original sound folder to something else.

I hope you all have fun with your new best friend Fin Fin!

Fin Fin is a wonderful little enigma from the past, and my attempt to make it easily accessible even in the present is something I hope you will all enjoy.

If you encounter any issues in Fin Fin on QEMU, please contact me about it.

To view the changelog, credits, and some more info about this project check below the 'Keep reading'.

Changelog

Some information is cut for brevity, the full version can be found inside of Fin Fin on QEMU and the MEGA folder.

v2.2

Added several new Fin Fin screensavers the user may choose from Updated method for calculating Transfer folder size Updated emulated machine to use 128mb of RAM and a Pentium Updated main teoboot.exe executable to fix several issues Updated shortcuts

v2.1

Removed WHPX launching options Removed FinFinWHPX.bat and FinFinWHPX.exe Removed startup crash fix as it was only needed for WHPX Modified folder settings in Windows 98 to open folders in the same window Rearranged Fin Fin on QEMU folder layout for cleaner appearance Added 'OK' button back to Microphone Setup that was mistakenly removed Updated shortcuts for Microphone Setup and Sound Recorder Fixed problem with 'Encyclopedia' launching script that caused screenshots to not show up in the photobook Added 'Transfer' Folder which allows for transferring files between the host and emulated machine Added options for launching with either GTK or SDL display Altered updater to improve ease of use and used NirCmd to improve process as a whole (Updater.bat & updater.iso)

v2.0 (Major Update - 6 Worlds Edition)

Modified original Taiwanese 6 Worlds version to add English Translation Added 'Microphone Sensitivity' shortcut to the desktop and start menu Added in 5 Worlds version Encyclopedia (finfinEncyc.exe & encyc30.GIZ) Added sound effects from 5 Worlds version (D:\sound) Added Mouse Integration Added Nircmd to replace launch batch scripts (C:\WINDOWS\nircmd.exe) Added Windowed Mode shortcut to start menu Altered launching scripts (FinFin.bat, FinFin.exe, FinFinWHPX.bat, FinFinWHPX.exe, FinFin Update.bat) Removed large amount of unecessary setup files from finfin.qcw Removed 'Task Scheduler' from taskbar Added Credits and Changelog shortcut to start menu Added dll to fix issue with running on Windows 7

v1.3

Added animated Fin Fin cursor

v1.2

Added guided updater (FinFin Update.bat & updater.IMA) Adjusted wallpaper Renamed startup shortcut ("_setup.bat" to "Crash Fix" at C:\WINDOWS\Start Menu\Programs\Startup) Adjusted Volume Control Settings

v1.1

Added new wallpaper (C:\background.jpg) Added new startup sound (C:\boot.wav)

v1.0 (First Public Release)

Changed from qemu-3dfx to base Removed unnecessary files in Windows Added missing shortcuts on Desktop

v0.5 (Playtester version)

Moved all Fin Fin data to finfin.qcw Created batch scripts for Disc.id Added shortcuts to launch programs Removed unnecessary programs from Windows Removed unnecessary files in Windows

Credits

Resources

The finfin Homepage (finfin.de) - By EMGE The finfin Archive (finfin-archiv.de) - By Xvemon, Nadine S., and EMGE Fin Fin 6 Worlds "Beta" (finfin-archive.de) - By Harald G.

Playtesters

mchi22 that-one-scratch-on-your-arm

Software

QEMU 7.1.0. (qemu.org) - By QEMU team: Peter Maydell, et al. NirCmd (nirsoft.net) - By Nir Sofer Resource Hacker (angusj.com) - By Angus Johnson

Updating Versions

Included is a guided updater that will help you transfer your save, screenshots, and sound recordings to the latest version.

Place the new version in a temporary location without replacing the original. Then, just run "Updater.bat" and follow the instructions.

System Time

Time in the emulated machine is synced to the host PC.

If you would like to time travel in Fin Fin, you can change the time in the emulated PC but it will go back to normal after a restart. Note that if you do this you will not be able to go back to the original time, you can only go forwards using this method If you would like to permanently change the time, you can use the built in date-changer present in the 'New Contact' program, but this will cause the loss of the current profile.

QEMU

Though it should be quite obvious by now, this project works through the use of QEMU, an open source emulator. Specifically, its emulating a full Windows 98 SE machine, and then the game is run on that.

The emulated machine has 128mb of RAM, an AC97 Soundcard, and a Pentium CPU.

Files

The only files this project really has aside from QEMU are FinFin GTK.bat/.exe and FinFin SDL.bat/.exe

The reason I list the .exe and .bat files together is that they do exactly the same thing. The executables aren't really 'true executables', but are instead just batch scripts that have been converted into .exe files. When they run, they essentially create a temporary batch script that deletes itself. The only real benefit of this is that its a bit more straightforward for launching and creating shortcuts, and that there is no distracting command window while playing.

Within the 'Data' folder is where the bulk of the project is. Inside are two virtual hard drives, w98.qcw being the main Windows 98 drive, and finfin.qcw being where all the Fin Fin game data is.

[reasonsforhope]

"The amount of electricity generated by the UK’s gas and coal power plants fell by 20% last year, with consumption of fossil fuels at its lowest level since 1957.

Not since Harold Macmillan was the UK prime minister and the Beatles’ John Lennon and Paul McCartney met for the first time has the UK used less coal and gas.

The UK’s gas power plants last year generated 31% of the UK’s electricity, or 98 terawatt hours (TWh), according to a report by the industry journal Carbon Brief, while the UK’s last remaining coal plant produced enough electricity to meet just 1% of the UK’s power demand or 4TWh.

Fossil fuels were squeezed out of the electricity system by a surge in renewable energy generation combined with higher electricity imports from France and Norway and a long-term trend of falling demand.

Higher power imports last year were driven by an increase in nuclear power from France and hydropower from Norway in 2023. This marked a reversal from 2022 when a string of nuclear outages in France helped make the UK a net exporter of electricity for the first time.

Carbon Brief found that gas and coal power plants made up just over a third of the UK’s electricity supplies in 2023, while renewable energy provided the single largest source of power to the grid at a record 42%.

It was the third year this decade that renewable energy sources, including wind, solar, hydro and biomass power, outperformed fossil fuels [in the UK], according to the analysis. Renewables and Britain’s nuclear reactors, which generated 13% of electricity supplies last year, helped low-carbon electricity make up 55% of the UK’s electricity in 2023.

[Note: "Third year this decade" refers to the UK specifically, not global; there are several countries that already run on 100% renewable energy, and more above 90% renewable. Also, though, there have only been four years this decade so far! So three out of four is pretty good!]

Dan McGrail, the chief executive of RenewableUK, said the data shows “the central role that wind, solar and other clean power sources are consistently playing in Britain’s energy transition”.

“We’re working closely with the government to accelerate the pace at which we build new projects and new supply chains in the face of intense global competition, as everyone is trying to replicate our success,” McGrail said.

Electricity from fossil fuels was two-thirds lower in 2023 compared with its peak in 2008, according to Carbon Brief. It found that coal has dropped by 97% and gas by 43% in the last 15 years.

Coal power is expected to fall further in 2024 after the planned shutdown of Britain’s last remaining coal plant in September. The Ratcliffe on Soar coal plant, owned by the German utility Uniper, is scheduled to shut before next winter after generating power for over 55 years.

Renewable energy has increased sixfold since 2008 as the UK has constructed more wind and solar farms, and the large Drax coal plant has converted some of its generating units to burn biomass pellets.

Electricity demand has tumbled by 22% since its peak in 2005, according to the data, as part of a long-term trend driven by more energy efficient homes and appliances as well as a decline in the UK’s manufacturing sector.

Demand for electricity is expected to double as the UK aims to cut emissions to net zero by 2050 because the plan relies heavily on replacing fossil fuel transport and heating with electric alternatives.

In recent weeks [aka at the end of 2023], offshore wind developers have given the green light to another four large windfarms in UK waters, including the world’s largest offshore windfarm at Hornsea 3, which will be built off the North Yorkshire coast by Denmark’s Ørsted."

-via The Guardian, January 2, 2024

[7ndipity]

Them With An Autistic S/o

Ot7 x Reader

Summary: How the members would handle/react to their S/o being on the spectrum.

Warnings: Mentions of sensory issues, feeling over/under stimulated, depression, meltdowns, stimming.

A/N: Thanks to the lovely anon who requested this! This is a list I’ve actually wanted to write for a while, but I’d been slightly nervous/unsure about it. But as someone who’s also on the spectrum, I know how much comfort similar posts from other blogs have brought me! I also tried to keep this one a bit lighter, since someone asked for a separate list about meltdowns/shutdowns, but if there’s any specific reactions/hcs like this that you guys want, let me know! (Please note that these are based off my own knowledge/experience, so I’m sorry if they don’t fit for everyone)

Masterlist

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

Jin:

I feel like he’d be slightly confused and worried at first because he’s not sure what to do/how to help you, but once you explain a bit more, he gets a lot more comfortable, and really is such a good caregiver when he needs to be.

Catches onto your different stims pretty quickly and what each one means.

Like, y’all have whole conversations solely through funny little hums and stim noises.

Really good at reading and matching your mood/energy. You wanna talk about the Mayans nonstop for two hours? Cool! You want to just sit silently and do nothing? Also cool!

He’s really good at normalizing your symptoms and making them seem like nbd(because to him, they aren’t) Food sensitivities? He’s got them too! You hate loud noises and crowds? Same Honey, let’s get the fuck outta here! He knows they’re not quite the same thing, of course, but if it makes you feel more comfortable and safe being your true, unmasked self with him, then that’s all that matters to him.

Really good at calming you down when you feel overwhelmed or on the verge of meltdown.

Does his absolute best to bring your mood up whenever you’re struggling or feeling really down, pulling out his best dad jokes(even if they don’t make sense to you), bringing your favorite snacks, etc.

Yoongi:

I think he would handle it really well. Does his research after you tell him, and asks you about it casually during dates/hangouts.

So fucking respectful of your boundries. If you prefer to have your own space, he’s totally fine letting you do your own thing. If you need more closeness and cuddles, he’s all over that too, letting you sit right next to him while he works.

Not only lets you rant about your special interests, but makes the effort to take interest in them and asks questions. Randomly buys you little things related to them.

He’s so calming and soothing when you’re feeling stressed or overstimulated, understanding whenever you randomly need rest or quiet time(stress nap buddies)

Keeps things like extra sunglasses and headphones in his bag for you, just in case you forget yours.

Would have a lot of fun if you have audio stims, letting you listen to his new songs because your reactions and enthusiasm are so cute to him. Makes you panning audios as gifts.

Always there to look out for you whenever executive dysfunction decides to kick your ass. Washes the dishes, doing the laundry, restocking your safe foods, etc. He would also be really good at body doubling.

Hobi:

I honestly think he would be really good with an S/O on the spectrum. Like, he literally designed Mang, who is soo ND coded like omg😭, so I think he would be able to understand you really well.

(if you haven’t seen the videos of him talking about Mang’s personality and character traits during the re-design process last year, pls go watch them, I almost cried)

Loves buying you new fidgets and stim toys whenever he finds new ones to try(he even has a collection of chewlery that he wears bc he thinks they’re neat).

Is really good reading you and distracting you when you start to get overstimulated or anxious, sometimes noticing before you do.

Lowkey protective over you in spaces and situations he knows are stressful for you, positioning himself next to you whenever he spots things he knows bother you.

You know how Yoongi described him as a vitamin? That’s how it is for you now too.💛

He’s so stimmy himself, so he would find a lot of your stims really relatable and endearing. Like, if you start happy stimming, he can’t help but join right in, bouncing or squealing with you. It makes him so happy that you feel comfortable enough with him to share those parts of yourself with him.

Namjoon:

Instantly super supportive when you told him, making an effort to research on his own, as well as listening to your personal experiences to understand as much as possible.

Happily sits and lets you info-dump about your special interests. He honestly loves seeing you so passionate and animated about whatever you’re talking about and loves getting a glimpse into how your mind works(it was probably during one of these moments that he realized he was in love with you)

Surprisingly good pebbler, he’s always finding cool rocks or shells for your collections.

Doesn’t mind speaking for you on days when you’re nonverbal.

The sweetest when you’re feeling overstimulated. He closes all the curtains to make it dark and cozy and sits with you, talking as softly as needed or not talking at all, tapping your hand gently now and then to let you know he’s still there.

Soo protective over you, almost to a fault at times. Like, you might have to scold him once or twice about babying you, but he really doesn’t mean to, he just wants to make sure you’re safe and happy.

The world feels a lot less scary tho with him next you. You know if you need anything, he’s got your back.

Jimin:

The softest boi🥺 He was honestly a little scared when you first told him, because he didn’t want to do anything wrong and was worried he wouldn’t be ‘good’ at looking after you, but he quickly relaxed and grew more confident as he learned more from you.

The best comforter when you’re feeling overwhelmed or depressed, full of quiet reassurances and long hugs(if you’re okay with those). He’ll gladly cuddle with you under your weighted blanket for however long you need to feel better.

Literally set up a little “nest” for you at his place with a like beanbag chair and your favorite types of blankets/pillows, so you have your own place to just ‘be’ and recoup when you need it.

Carries fidget toys and sensory aids like sunglasses and headphones with him at all times, just in case you need them.

Really good at communicating with you on days when you’re nonverbal, whether through texts or little notes(which he always adds little doodles on to make your smile😊)

Makes sure you never feel guilty or like a burden to him for letting him in on those tougher days. If anything, they make him love you even more because of the trust you have in him.

It really makes him feel so proud and happy inside that you find so much comfort in his presence and that he gets to take care of you.💜

Taehyung:

Another that I think would be particularly good with a neurodivergent S/O. Like, everyone jokes about how he’s weird, so I think he’d love that you’re both your kind of own unique kinds of ‘weird’.

Happily rewatches your favorite comfort shows/films with you, and speaks in fluent film quotes with you.

Loves when you fidget and stim with his hands or fingers.

If you like pressure stims, he’s a dream come true. Like, the man’s a living weighted blanket, so when you basically give him a doctor's note for cuddles? He’s never gonna let you go.

As relaxed as he might come across sometimes tho, he’s super observant of your stims and triggers and takes it so seriously whenever you start feeling overwhelmed or stressed.

It doesn’t matter where you are or what you’re doing, if you need a break, he’s getting you to a quiet place where you can sit and just recalibrate.

Rivals Jin and Yoongi for top spot in the acts of service department on your bad days, making sure you eat properly, doing any household chores that need done. He even learned how to wash your weighted blanket so you don’t have to.

Jungkook:

Was definitely a little lost and overwhelmed when you first explained everything to him, but he really takes it in stride and tries to learn as much as possible to help make things easier for you where he can.

The King of comfort squeezes. Like you’ve seen his arms, he gives the best hugs, I just know it(especially on those “the weighted blanket isn't enough, I need a hydraulic press” days)

Loves learning about your special interests. Like, It’s no longer just your special interest, it’s our special interest. He’s even studying and finding things for it on his own to surprise you with.

Honestly plays with some of your fidget toys more than you do, lol! You might even end up giving him a few of his favorites😊

Gets super happy and smiley whenever you get echolalia of his songs.

Another member of the protective squad, ain’t no bad stimuli getting to his baby if he can help it!

The gentlest with you when you're overstimulated or having a tough day. Anything you need, he’ll do without question. All he cares about is making sure that you feel safe and comfortable🥺

Taglist: @sopebubbles-replies @btsw1fe @this-must-be-my-tardis @whitefoxgirl @bethanysnow @coffeedepressionsoup @main-bangtansmauyeondan @feminympho @a-gayish-unicorn @dfqcsqueen @mother2monsters @captainorangegoose @k4ngelz

[disabledbutchblues]

able-bodied neurotypical people want quiet disability. invisible disability. they love it when we don’t complain and don’t shove our needs in their face. they love it when we stay home and die quietly instead of trying to live (but they don’t like it when we stay home and need caregivers).

[paragraph about self then next ones on more general and important things] i recently realized that i make many people uncomfortable irl because i talk about my symptoms. i wasn’t aware it was wrong, because i’m autistic and struggle a lot with notions of public vs private space, and what can be said to whom. i’m very open about my disabilities and struggles, both because i don’t realize i’m saying something i shouldn’t, and because i don’t have a choice and often can’t mask (i am not high masking. not low masking either tho). i don’t wear unnoticeable noise cancelling headphones, they’re not good enough for me at all, i wear big obvious ear defenders with a fluorescent part. i sit down on the floor of a store if my legs hurt. i don’t sit normally anywhere, including at school, because i can’t, i can’t sit correctly and not move, it’s painful. i don’t hesitate to tell people i have terrible executive dysfunction. i openly say i am in pain and need to rest, even if it’s abnormal for a teenager to not have a healthy strong body. when it seems relevant to the conversation, i share the fact that i struggled with an eating disorder and self harm and that i recovered/am recovering. when someone asks me how i am doing, i tell them i’m feeling terrible because i am in pain or because i am suicidal or because i am overwhelmed— this is partly a choice to be open about my disability, partly the fact that i don’t notice until it’s too late that they don’t want me to be honest, and party the fact that there are many things i cannot hide. i tell people that i am not independent, can’t cook, can’t go to new places alone, can’t shop, can’t maintain hygiene and that i don’t shower enough or brush my teeth regularly. when someone asks if i plan on learning how to drive i say that i don’t want to right now because my processing issues would be dangerous and i would get in an accident. i tell people i have meltdowns and shutdowns at school. i hit myself in public sometimes.

yet i am not visibly disabled. i’m very lucky and privileged within the disabled community. i am visibly weird and there is visibly something wrong with me but i am only visibly disabled to someone who spends some time with me and sees me unable to process informations or unable to do IADLs. strangers don’t know i’m disabled until i tell them— they mock a symptom or ask why i can’t do something and i say i’m autistic, i’m disabled, i’m in pain. and they already hate that i tell them. they say it’s private. they say my struggles are something personal. something to talk about with doctors but that no one else should have to know about.

some people are way more disabled than me, visibly disabled, disabled at first glance. some use mobility aids, full time or not. some have intellectual disabilities, some use an AAC device, some have a physical disability that cannot be concealed or an intellectual/developmental/mental disability that very obviously affects the way they move or communicate. some people don’t have a choice to mask or not to mask, don’t have a choice to be visibly disabled or not. strangers will immediately notice that these people are disabled, even without engaging in a conversation with them. and they hate it ! disabled people are supposed to be quiet and invisible and going outside with ear defenders or a mobility aid or anything, no matter if it is a small or a huge accommodation, is too much. but the bigger it is or the more you need help to do a ‘basic, easy’ thing, the worse it is. they stare at me in the street because of my ear defenders, but they don’t just stare when someone is in a wheelchair, they touch and break and don’t have any respect.

ableists think disabled people shouldn’t be in their way because they think we shouldn’t exist or that we are worthless. having an accommodation or an aid in public is already activism for them, already disturbing, already forcing them to see that they are privileged and that the world is not accessible.

to exist as a disabled person is beautiful. it’s brave. it’s something to be proud of. not because it’s inspiring that you are strong enough to live with your disability, not because "someone else would have killed themselves already in your situation," not because "i could never be like that ! you’re so courageous !", but because ableism is everywhere and it’s so hard to live in this world where they don’t want us to exist. it’s so hard to advocate for ourselves.

and for those who are not visibly disabled (like me), or at least not always ; for those who have low support needs ; for those who know how to mask : point out inaccessibility. force people to see their own ableism. make them uncomfortable. it’s also our job, our responsibility. if someone mocks me and calls me useless because i can’t do IADLs i say i’m disabled, stay very calm and inform them that many people are unable to perform BADLs without help and that they deserve just as much help and respect as anyone else. if someone points out how annoying my ear defenders are i ask why the place isn’t accessible for people in a wheelchair. etc etc. listen to people with higher support needs than you and amplify their voices. but also act irl.

we can all do better and force society to be better to.

and remember that accessibility for you doesn’t mean accessibility for everyone.

a place that accommodates sensory issues might not have accessible toilets. so it’s not good enough. an autism support group meeting has stim toys and ear defenders and happens in a quiet place ? that’s wonderful ! can a nonverbal person participate ? are caregivers welcome ? we can’t just think that "something is better than nothing." yes it is, but it’s not good enough. if a place or an event is accessible for one thing but not for something else, then it’s not accessible. and we need to be loud about it.

[del-thetiredwriter]

Mafia au/Good luck while running away from mafia

intro , part 0.5 , part 1 , part 3

Notes: Hello its been a while . First of all its little longer ususal but I hope you like it. And because of some health issues and some personal stuff I couldnt post anything. I'll try to post whever I have time.

Tags: @morokumi , @hrhqueenfox , @hasty-desert , @oceanside-pixie , @lianreine ,@h3apm3ch4n151m, @cecilebutcher, @ayachansan

Warning: my poor English, gn reader, fight scenes , running away from yandere ...

As you did the paperwork that Leona should have done but didn't, your eye fell on Leona's phone. Someone has been texting nonstop for the last 15 minutes. Whoever texted finally called. It was Vil. You took the phone to Leona. Disturbed by his sleep interruption, the executive of Savanaclaw answered the call and gestured for you to leave. You thought 'weird'. Meeting of executives who don't like each other to death.

"Leona-san, is there a problem sir? May I ask why Vil-san called you?" you asked. "It's not a big deal. You don't need to know."

"Is that so."

-

You gripped the steering wheel tightly. Your hands were shaking with adrenaline because of that fight at the restaurant an hour ago. They found you. Of course they did, but you were so used to your life in this last 1 month that you were taken by surprise for a moment. You should have cleared your mind now. Heartslabyul had already attacked. You could be attacked at any time. You should have been on the alert.

"Well, Y/N pack yourself up. You know them, they know you. There must be a way out. They probably have their men stationed at all the entrances and exits of the city. So it's almost impossible to get out of here without getting caught." you thought.

You opened the glove box. The situation was dire. Since you came to work with Alex this morning, you forgot that you 'cleaned' the car. "Damn" you cursed. All you had now were 3 bullets, a gun , an electroshock device, two morning sandwiches and some cash.It didn't seem like enough for an escape at all. 'I could have gone home and stocked up on some supplies and ammo, but since they found my work place, they probably found the house too. ' you thought. Your thoughts were interrupted by the vibration from your phone. The alarm of the security system you installed in your house was going on. When you looked at the cameras you saw 3 familiar face. You'll recognize those green predatory eyes wherever you see them. "Leona-san."

-

"Looks like the little herbivore has put some little toys in here, huh. Ruggie, turn those alarms off, they're too loud." said Leona as he surveyed the house.

"Leona-san, I told you to sneak in. It was obvious that someone like Y/N-shii was going to install a security system in the house. Now we've cleared our spot." Ruggie whined as he searched for the shutdown system. "Leona-san, what are you trying to do, sir?" ' Jack asked the reclining department manager. " Don't worry , They will come." said Leona lazily. "After all, they have no choice ."

-

"I don't have a better option than this." you sighed.

According to the cameras around the house, there were no men around. You did not know the position of the other executives. But looking at all your years in the mafia, one of the things you knew was that departments weren't going to work together to catch you. Leona was trying to get you on your feet by knowing your current situation, and it seemed like it was the best choice.

You checked inside the cameras one last time. Ruggie and Leona were in the Hall at the entrance, while Jack stood guard in the garage. "Damn, I wish I had a secret passage to the house." you said. Getting Jack first seemed like the best option to get in. "I'm on my really unlucky day… against two different departments in one night, huh."

-

Jack was lost in thought. He was thinking of you as he paced the garage. A month and a half ago, he suddenly couldn't reach you, then found out that you had left the mafia. Why did you leave, what was your reason? Why didn't you say anything to him? Jack felt betrayed. He paused with a small click. The garage door was slightly ajar. You jumped on him before he knew what was going on. You attacked him before he could come to him because of the blow he received and you used the electroshock device. "Sorry Jack." you said while tying it. "But while hunting, always pay attention to the hunt, otherwise you will be the hunted while you are the hunter." you said. Those were the words he said to you when you first went on a mission with Leona. You took the remaining strings and took one last look at Jack and locked the door on him.

-

"Ah~ all the hustle and bustle made me pretty hungry." said Ruggie, taking a bite of the donut he found in the fridge. "But you have to give it credit. Y/N-shii really tried hard. Security systems, cameras. soundproof walls… Who knows what else is in here , right Leona-san?" ' Ruggie asked the man lying in the armchair a few feet away. But the only response that came was a vague grunt. "Oh really, I'm going to Jack's. Call me if you need anything."

Ruggie began muttering to himself as he made his way down the hall. "This soundproofing thing really sucks. I feel like I'm in a horror movie." When he finally reached the garage door, he paused. There was something amiss. The door was locked. "Jack?" 'Oh no!' and with a sharp blow his vision darkened.

'I am indebted to the awful assassination training I received in Pormefiore.' you thought as you tied Ruggie. If Rook saw you in this state, he would surely utter some French nonsense and cry out of delight.

'last hunt' you thought. You had no chance to surprise attack this time, the fight was inevitable.

"You came." said Leona, his back to you as he sat on the sofa. He slowly turned his face towards you and grinned like a hunter playing with his prey. You pointed your gun at him. "Ah~ really, how cold you are. But I wouldn't do that if I were you." he said You looked at the table in the middle of the sofa set, Leona had found all your ammo. Then suddenly he stood up. "Don't you dare do anything wrong, otherwise-" "What," he interrupted. "Are you going to shoot me?" You didn't reply. "You know, I've been thinking a lot about why you left the mafia." He took a step towards you. "After all, you suddenly disappeared without any of us knowing. It was okay, we were very close." He took two more steps. "Don't Approach!" you warned. "Then why? You either wanted a normal life or -" "I said don't Approach !" and you pulled the trigger. Leona fell to the ground with the blow. First a few seconds of deep silence, then a chilling laugh. "Do you really think I'm not prepared for such situations?" he said. Before you could take your guard on, he made a move towards your gun and your gun fell to the ground. "Things might be more comfortable for you if you surrendered easily." said Leona, like a parent scolding his child. You grabbed a knife from the kitchen counter, but Leona grabbed you by the wrists and prevented you from attacking.

"You were supposed to behave yourself when you realized everything. Not running away stupidly." he said, tightening his grip.

You grit your teeth, You hit him in the face with your head. With this unexpected blow, Leona staggered backwards. With your freed hands, you took a handful of black pepper from the Black Pepper jar on the table and punched him in the face with your black pepper-filled fist. Roaring with pain from the dust in his eyes, Leona tried to attack you, but you got ahead of him and activated the booby traps. and Leona suddenly found himself in a ditch.

"You underestimated me, Leona-san. Remember, this is my territory. Even lions can be prey in the territory of the ridges when they are alone."

Without wasting any time, you started filling a bag with supplies and ammo. Meanwhile, Leona's phone started ringing. You picked up the phone on the table and saw the calling number,it was Boss.

"Hello Y/N, how are you?"

You didn't answer. Your old boss, Dire Crowley, was talking as usual as if nothing had happened.

"First of all, congratulations, defeating two of my managers in one night is not easy for everyone." You locked the door of the house while he was talking.

"You know, I'm a very generous person. That's why I wanted to let you know that the arrest warrant has been taken against you and that the whole mafia is after you." '

Oh, what a generosity. Like I didn't know this." you thought.

"But remember, I'm on your side. If you can escape from all, I'll give you your freedom."

"What if I Lose?"

"Then we both know what will happen." And the phone has turned off.

-

"Agh! I was so sure the Kingscholar would catch them." groaned former Savanaclaw manager Ashton Vargas. "But he didn't catch them. You've lost the bet so please let me demand the money." Sam smiled. "It was unexpected even for Y/N." said Trein, taking a sip of his tea. "Would you like to change your bets on who will win?" Sam offered. He grinned mischievously as he pocketed the check from Vargas. "The rightfully of what we're doing is debatable, but it looks like it'll be fun. A little fun never hurt anyone." said Crowley. While looking at Crewel, who is silently watching outside. "Okay, then let me take your bets."

[auschizm]

what are some examples of autism+schizospec behaviors? im new here

Traits that are generally found in both schizophrenic people and autistic people are, among others:

Stimming

Flat affect/lack of appropriate emotional reactions and/or "inappropriate" emotional reactions

Executive dysfunction + various other cognitive challenges

Various struggles with verbal communication

Feelings of alienation and isolation

Often being labeled "weird" and "offputting" in social settings

Having a unique and atypical approach to/view of the world

Having less energy/"spoons" avaliable than most people do

Tendency to experience shutdowns and meltdowns if pushed/overwhelmed

Tendency to "live in our own world"/get stuck in our heads