#for tuna

[dotster001]

For Tuna; General End

Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three

Choose another ending

A/N: as always, add your votes for the next end here. Also, this end is going to be...familiar at first, but that's just what happens when you jump dimensions.

"So, the end has arrived."

Grim pushed his lens-less glasses down his nose and stared at Silver and Lilia, both of whom were sitting on the other side of a desk.

"I'll be honest, neither of you two is the richest here. That title belongs to Malleus and Leona, respectively. But Malleus will prioritize his country over me, I mean Y/N, and Leona, well let's face it, it's only a matter of time before he disgraces himself and is off the kingdom's payroll."

Grim waved around a sheet of paper.

"Which puts both of you in third place. Oddly enough, your finance situation is nearly identical. So it comes down to who I think would be a better dad. I know this will come as a shock to you both, but Y/N isn't actually my henchhuman. They're my parent."

Lilia gasped in mock shock as Silver just stared.

Grim sighed heavily, leaning back in his seat. “An anonymous source has told me that Lilia is the type of dad to leave his son's alone in the woods to fend for themselves. So Silver, congratulations, I guess.”

Lilia jumped out of his seat, excitedly hugging Silver.

“My boy! Congratulations! We shall have a splendid wedding!”

“Father,” Silver said sternly, gently pushing Lilia away. “We don't have to do this anymore.”

Lilia quirked an eyebrow in confusion, as Grim just stared.

“I know I'll always be your little boy to you, but I'm not a child anymore. You don't have to always put me first.”

Lilia stiffened, but attempted to cover it up with a smile.

“I know, but-”

“Y/N and I don't love each other. Our relationship is purely platonic,” Silver said firmly. “I never wanted to do this, especially knowing how in love with them you are, but now that I've beaten you at something, I can tell you to man up, and confess your feelings.”

Lilia 's jaw dropped. Silver felt the urge to retreat, but stood his ground. He couldn't let his father live with regret. So he played one more card.

“It would be a nice way to complete our family. Y/N would be the perfect step parent for me. I just know it.”

Lilia 's expression softened. “Silver…”

“A true warrior doesn't hesitate in battle! Go!” Silver said with uncharacteristic firmness, making Lilia actually jump and begin to run to the door, before stopping himself with a laugh.

“I've raised the perfect little general,” he giggled.

“Go!” Silver shouted. And Lilia went.

“What the heck was that?” Grim shouted at Silver.

“I'm your big brother now, that's what that was,” Silver grinned, with a mischievous look that could have only come from his father.

….

There was a knock on the front door. Grim was out for the night, promising there would be no bill. So you were just enjoying a quiet night in. You had no doubt that if you opened that door right now, it would be someone who would cause chaos. Probably Ace. Definitely Ace.

One of the ghosts moved to open the door, but you pressed a finger to your lips. He gave a quiet snicker and a nod, and went back upstairs, ignoring the knock.

The knock stopped after a moment, and the room was silent again.

“Who are you hiding from?” A voice whispered right next to your ear, and you screamed.

You grabbed a pillow to defend yourself, and jumped off the couch, turning to face your attacker. Lilia was doing the equivalent of laying on his stomach, and kicking his legs up, except in midair. He was giggling excitedly, and you gave him a nasty glare.

“What the hell, Lilia!” You screamed. “How did you get in?”

He just giggled again, ignoring the question.

“I heard you were all alone tonight. I didn't want you to be lonely,” he hummed.

“I- I'm not lonely!” You shouted. “I have half a mind to kick you out!”

“You won't.”

“I most certainly will.”

“You won't.”

“And why, oh wise Lilia, won't I kick you out of my house?”

He grinned, and floated closer to you.

“Because you, radiant Y/N, are absolutely mad for me.”

You choked on your own spit, your face instantly growing hot.

“Egh ugh, nuh uh!”

“How eloquent!” He burst into laughter. “But a falsehood, I am certain.”

He slipped even closer to you. You took one step back, but after that froze. He gently wrapped his arms around your neck, looking into your eyes, his own burning passionately.

“Urgh, nuh uh,” you whispered.

“Nuh uh?” He smiled slyly.

“Nuh uh,” you said half heartedly.

“Hm,” he hummed. “Then prove it. Kiss me.”

You choked on your spit again.

“Huh!”

“If you can kiss me, and then tell me you really don't love me, I'll believe you and never bring it up again.”

You couldn't do that. You absolutely couldn't kiss him. Because when he was proved right, you'd definitely want to punch the smug smile off his face.

“Time's up!” He shouted, before pressing his lips to yours. 

You hated how good he was at kissing. Even if you didn't love him, you wouldn't have been able to think straight after this, and would accidentally send him the wrong message. But you did love him, which meant you didn't want to stop kissing him.

But Lilia knew that. And he liked to play with his prey. He pulled away, licking his lips as he grinned.

“Well? Still ‘nuh uh’?”

“Nuh uh,” you whispered.

“Mhm. That's what I thought. Anything you want to say?”

You yanked him back in, threading your fingers through his hair, and kissing him as hard as you could. You could feel the vibrations of his triumphant giggle. 

You pulled your pillow holding arm slowly back to hit him, but he quickly separated, gently twisting your arm behind your back, and forcing you to drop the pillow. He giggled and pressed his mouth to your neck.

“I see we'll never get bored together,” he whispered. “You're absolutely amazing.”

“Ha ha,” you said snarkily. He grazed his canines against your neck, and you froze. You knew some of your classmates said he was a vampire but…

"You just smell so delicious," he purred.

“Kidding! Let's make out some more,” before you could glare at him again, and say something snarky, he yanked you to the couch and started kissing you again.

You could get back at him tomorrow. 

Damn.

He was way too good at kissing.

....

Tag list-@shytastemakerthing @stygianoir @leonia0 @lleoll @eccedentesiast-sapphic @supertmntgirl @cxsmicdustdreams @aethermostbeloved @krystalkiller25 @asmallbean3 @theneurodivergentdummy @candlewitch-cryptic @smilingfox22-blog @phantomgaming1920 @the-dumber-scaramouche @noidonothavetimeforthis @bontensbabygirl @xxoomiii @somany-fandoms-solittle-time @bre99 @stupidsimp @sus0daddy @a-small-tyrant @imlost-sendhelp @mizukiblogs @itslucieen @nico707 @red-viewe @fucthisshitimout @kazumify @busycloudy @ny0000mw00m

[ca-dmv-bot]

Customer: I'M A PROFESSIONAL FISHERMAN AND I FISH FOR TUNA ALL OVER THE WORLD DMV: I GOOGLED HIM, HE IS AND HE DOES Verdict: DENIED

[fleshmonger]

Rotating Sandwich Mood Board

Rotating Sandwich Mood Board

[tunabuna]

portal wip i'm probs not gonna finish yet. basically the concept is glados kills chell and glados is like "chell look i finally got u lol! haha chell? why aren't you answering chell"

[tunaricebowl]

i don’t know which autistic/adhd/any kind of neurodivergent person needs to hear this but: make a “just in case” bag

this is a pic of mine. it contains:

loop earplugs on the zipper

prescription glasses with a clip on sunglasses attachment

my public transport discount card

a pen

a glasses cloth + wet glasses wipes (which can also be used to clean my hands if needed!

wireless earbuds in case my headphones give out

tips for my apple pencil + silicon covers if i need a different texture/the sound is too loud

a sanitary pad (not for me, as i had a hysterectomy, but i like carrying one around for my menstruating friends)

a pouch with hair ties for when my hair bothers me

autism lanyard (not pictured, as i put it in after i took it)

will i use these every day? not necessarily. but it’s good to have these all in one place in a little pouch so it’s easy to throw into my bag as i use different ones for different occasions. that way i don’t have to think about all these things individually.

it might seem like common sense for some people, but i didn’t think of this until recently. so i wanted to share this in case it could be handy for other people. some more ideas for what to put in your bag under the break. you can make this as big or as small as you like so some ideas may seem a bit big

powerbank + cables (preferably a powerbank that has a LOT of charge)

snacks (do keep an eye on the expiration date)

painkillers/emergency meds (same thing about the expiration date)

sewing kit

deodorant/perfume

mini fan

hand warmers

scissors/nail clippers (for when tags/threads/your nails are bothering you)

tweezers

lucky charm (i have my lucky cat keychain. it just calms me to have)

plushie/stress ball/fidget toy

mints/a mini toothbrush and toothpaste

extra pair of underwear (for if you suddenly need to stay somewhere overnight or if an accident happens)

comb

band-aids + disinfectant

hand cream/soothing cream

soap/soap leaves

similarly, some mini shampoo or mini body wash (again for if you suddenly need to stay the night. there’s probably already some wherever you’re staying but again. this is a just in case bag)

q-tips

chapstick

makeup remover wipes

razors

hand sanitizer/general sanitizer

wet wipes/tissues

foldable bag

ruler/tape measure

this is a lot but keep in mind, these are just ideas. you don’t have to use everything, just pick out which things you think would be handy for you and make your bag accordingly. do feel free to add onto the list if you have any other ideas.

[lady-silver-ice]

We got our cat a new box that happened to have a tent in it.

[kewpiekills]

yellowfin tuna

[tunabesimpin]

Taking the boys to Burger King for their birthday this year

Bonus: Tuna brought handmade gifts

I just know he would hate the hyper realistic cakes that dont look like cake

I'm bullying ahead of time this year because I know damn well I'm not gonna be able to get either of their bday cards

[catfindr]

[lovertm]

x x

[egophiliac]

(almost) four years in, and I finally had time to draw something for the anniversary! woo! 🎉🎉🎉

[dotster001]

Daddy End

Previous Chapters: One Two Three Choose Another Ending

Please see me after class

That's what was scrawled on the top of your paper.

"What did you do?" You hissed at your kitty companion, who was usually the reason you had to stay after class. If you could go back in time, you would tell yourself not to accept "beast tamer" as a title.

"Nothin'" he hissed back. "Maybe you're the one who messed up this time."

"Not likely," you hissed back, before seeing Crewel giving you a disapproving stare. You turned back to your cauldron, deciding to grill your roommate later.

"Everything okay?" Alano, your lab partner from Octavinelle, asked.

"Yeah, Crewel just wants me to talk to him after class."

"Do you want me to wait for you?"

"No, but I appreciate the offer. It means a lot."

You gave him a reassuring smile, and he nodded skeptically, before adding another item to the cauldron.

After a tense 45 minutes, the class cleared out, and you stood before Crewel's desk. He sat back in his chair for a moment, and sighed.

"As I understand it, I haven't been chosen to be your husband, by your cat."

"Wha-" you started, but he cut you off by pressing a red gloved finger to your lips.

"No, no, it's alright, pup. If I am truly not worthy, then I shall have to accept that."

His finger to your lips turned into a gentle caress, ending with his hand resting on the side of your neck. Your head was spinning, as his cologne clouded your senses. After a pause, he gave another heavy sigh, before saying in a low voice,

"But if you ever change your mind, and want to give me a second chance," he gently squeezed your neck, not enough to hurt you, just enough to send a shiver up your spine, before slowly pulling his hand away, "Even just for one evening, where I can feed you the finest of delicacies and dress you in the finest of clothes, and simply bask in your presence, you know where to find me."

He sat down, and began working on papers, as though he hadn't just told you that your kitty roommate had ignored your orders not to sell you off, while simultaneously making you wish he'd sold you off, specifically to him.

"Um, professor?" Your tongue was lead in your mouth, and you felt like you'd need to drink a lot of water with how dry your mouth felt.

"Divus, my pet."

He wasn't even looking up at you. You made an attempt to clear your throat.

"D-Divus, I don't know anything about what you're talking about…"

He gave an unenthusiastic hum.

"But I wouldn't be opposed…"

Another hum.

"That is, if you wanted to…"

He looked up at you, face blank. Your cheeks started to burn, and you prayed to whatever was out there that he didn't know how flustered he had made you. You weren't that lucky, though. You were pretty sure he knew.

"You know…" you finished, pretty much below a whisper.

He stared at you for a moment, before gasping.

"Could it be, my favorite pet feels the same as I do?" He stood, his eyes widening. "Could it be, I still have a chance with you?"

He reached out his hand to cup your cheek, before faltering, and holding it in place. You gently took his outstretched hand in yours, giving it a light squeeze.

He smiled a gentle, relieved smile, and it struck you how he wasn't that much older than you really. He still was just a lovestruck school boy, who'd happened to be smart enough to graduate earlier than some, and rose through the ranks quickly, probably due to some money saving scheme of Crowley's. He seemed just as nervous about asking you out as you were about him.

"I know this classy little pasta restaurant. It's not overly luxurious, but still fancy. Would you meet me back here in an hour, so we could go together?"

There was that schoolboy light in his eyes again.

You nodded, and he kissed the back of your hand, before gently shooing you out.

You were far too flustered to notice Grim and Crowley standing in the doorway and glaring at Crewel.

"And that's how it's done, gentlemen," Divus said with a smirk, once you were out of earshot. He grinned at Grim.

"Don't worry too much about it, kitty, you'll have plenty of riches and deluxe tuna from me, even though it hurt dreadfully to know you didn't pick me."

Crowley pouted even deeper.

"You're lucky I'm so generous, or…"

"Or what? Face it, Dire, we both know who the better sugar daddy is here."

And with that he brushed past both of them, humming a happy little tune to himself as he prepared for his date.

The End

[tinyfantasminha]

Who is your favorite fearless hero 🐱

Guys im being so serious Puss in Boots the Last Wish became one of my comfort movies so fast SOBS I could easily picture Grim in Puss' position through the whole movie so I had this idea! It's just perfect lol. And who else could Death/Lobo be. You had it coming (And an actor AU as a complementary:)

[atherea]

“It, uh. Had a virus.” 

“So you smashed it?” Bruce, usually quite composed, looked baffled.

“Yeah?” Tim said, like it should be obvious, “I didn’t want it to spread to my other appliances.”

Bruce looked astounded by Tim’s sheer stupidity.

fanart of ch19 of @wesslan's cards on the table, i read this all last night and its been wired in my brain since then oh my god i love all the silly moments in this fic

[tunabuna]

yeah idk do u like this tumblr

[helpallthenamesaretakenblog]

rereading hoo, its so fun to see the characters get absolute whiplash from percy

+ bonus:

Not just the other five who have known him for a few days, EVEN ANNABETH