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aritsukemo · 1 month

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S/o who tends to skip meals | Multiple Characters

Characters: Sunny, Basil, Aubrey, and Hero

Warnings: Depictions of possible eating disorders. Reader shows symptoms of depression ( Sunny and Basil ). Reader purposefully starves themself ( Aubrey ). Stressed out reader ahead ( Hero ). With all that said, read at your own risk!

A/N: Thought I'd post something Omori related while I was in school. This particular scenario has been in my drafts for over a year ( so bare with me if the writing sucks more ass than usual ) and I was never able to finish it over on Wattpad so I thought, "Why not just post the completed ones over here?". Also I must, again, apologize for the writing. I wrote this when I wasn't in the best headspace so it's probably blander than usual- 😅

Sunny stares at your retreating form with a frown on his face. This is the—what? Fourth time this week that you've skipped out on your lunch? He knows this not because you've told him ( You'd never tell him about something like this ) but because of his own observations.

At first, he thought you simply didn't want what was served to you that day or something, but after today, seeing you reject one of your favorite meals, he knew something had to be up.

And so, he grabbed your plate and followed after you.

"Uhm..Sunny, why are you following me?" You asked, now sitting down on the steps that led up to your front door, as you looked back at him. Sunny doesn't answer you and instead walks up to you, sits down beside you, and silently offers you your plate full of food that you hadn't eaten.

"Oh, that's why.." You eye the large serving of food with a look of discomfort that you try your best to hide. Even with it's pleasant-smelling aroma, you have no will to eat. To be completely honest, you barely had the energy to come sit out here—hell, you barely even got out of bed and got dressed this morning.

"I'll eat it later," You finally say, "I had a big breakfast this morning." A lie. In actuality you didn't eat anything for breakfast this morning. You don't know why, you just..simply didn't have the appetite for it.

Sunny continues to stare at you in silence, his face baring the neutral expression you had grown used to. He still holds the plate up to you despite your rejection which makes you look away. After a moment, you feel a light tap on your shoulder. You turn back to look at him only to see him holding the utensil with a small piece of food hanging off the edge of it.

"Thanks Sunny, but really, I'm not hungry. I'll just eat later." You say and to your surprise, he replies back in a small voice.

"Please.." He mumbles, "Can you eat a little bit of this?"

Sunny always preferred to stay quiet and let others—mostly Kel—speak for him. It was a habit that took time for you to grow used to and now that you have, it sounds odd hearing your voice..

"I'm not hungry.." You push but he doesn't listen, still holding the small portion of food up to your lips, waiting for you to open your mouth and consume it.

"Please eat," He says and you end up sighing. If it were literally anyone else in the world, you would tell them no again and probably leave to avoid further conversation but since it's Sunny asking- No, pleading with you right now to eat just a few spoonfuls of food, you find it hard to refuse him..

"Alright, fine. For you, I guess.." You say in an almost defeated tone, "But only a little. I'm not eating it all.."

With a nod of his head, Sunny quickly shoves the small amount of food into your mouth before scooping up another miniscule portion and repeating the step again, and again, and again until a quarter of the food was gone from the plate.

Huh, guess you were a little hungry after all..

"How could this have happened?" Is what you thought as you gazed at your knees which were slick from your tears.

You had just seen them not too long ago. You were just laughing, joking with them about dumb stuff you did as kids and ranting to them about everything that you've been going through recently and now, they're gone. It was hard to believe but unfortunately it was true. If the phone call from your best friend—who's voice was hoarse from crying—about the entire thing wasn't enough proof of that.

They were dead. You didn't even get the chance to say goodbye to them one last time. No one did..

A light knock sounds through your room. You just barely heard it. As you wipe your tears, you mumble a small 'come in' and the door cracks open just enough for Basil to slip in.

"Hey.." He whispers, a sad look pasted on his face. You glance over at him, but fail to greet him back. You can't. If you tried, it probably wouldn't be coherent anyway..

Basil walks over to where you sit on the floor near your bed and sits just a bit away from you. You don't glance at him this time.

"..I'm sorry for your loss.." He finally says. Maybe those weren't the best words to say, but that was the only comforting thing he could think of. I mean, it was better than saying nothing, right? Hopefully it was.. If not, Basil might just crawl into a hole and suffocate..

"Uhm.. I don't know if this is related, but I noticed you haven't been eating as much as you usually do.. Not that I'm saying you eat a lot! You just normally eat more than the amount you've been eating which is..practically nothing.. But that's not important right now. I mean it is but.." Basil sighs.

Why was talking so difficult?

"I.." Basil snaps over to look at you, who's eyes were glossed over with tears despite your best efforts to hide them. You hated burdening people, Basil especially. He already had so much to deal with after all, you wouldn't want to add onto his list of problems..

"I'm.. I'm fine, Basil.." You murmur, your voice sounding a bit strained as you swallowed the sobs that threatened to slip from your lips. Basil's frown deepens at the sight.

"You don't have to lie..or hide it. I can tell how sad you are.. U- Understandably so, if someone I cared about died I'd probably.." He pauses for a moment before mumbling out a small 'nevermind' under his breath.

"I know you're grieving, but you shouldn't.." He pauses again, "..I guess what I'm trying to say is.. Although you're really sad and you feel like nothing matters right now, you should still try to take care of yourself. If you don't, the feeling will only get worse and your health will go down the drain too.."

"Of course, I can't force you to take care of yourself or anything, but if you can at least start eating again—"

"I.. I get it," You interrupt, "And I know you're worried. I just..need some time."

Basil nods his head, "I get that, take as much time as you need. B- But not too much time, you can't go long without food.."

"You need to stop doing this," Aubrey grumbled as she attempted to hand you a plate of pizza only for you to glare at her.

"Eat," She says firmly after a while of silence, but you make no attempt to grab the plate of pizza. Irritation begins to bubble at the back of Aubrey's throat, but she swallows it back as best she can. She's been trying to work on controlling her anger lately since you aren't fond of such negative energy.

..Plus, it wouldn't be a good idea to shove this pizza slice down your throat, now would it?

A few days ago, you had gotten into a really bad fight with a family member. Arguments surfaced often in your family, but you're usually able to brush it off. This time, however, was different. Aubrey doesn't know what happened and you've refused to tell her the details. All she knows is that whatever it was, it made you so angry that you couldn't get over it and ended up losing your appetite for a couple days.

She found it rather dumb and backwards to starve yourself because you were mad, but Aubrey shouldn't be one to talk when she thinks back on all of the things she's done in the past due to the simple fact that she was upset..

"This is stupid," She ends up saying anyways, "You shouldn't take your anger out on your body because you're pissed off."

At this point you weren't even listening to her, looking back down at the page of the book you were reading as you made it obvious that you were tuning her out. The sight made Aubrey's blood boil.

"Eat the dang slice already before I make you," She threatens, but even then, you heed her no mind and continue with what you're doing.

Agh! Why were you being so difficult right now? She's actually trying to be a gentle and thoughtful girlfriend for once and you're acting like some brat! Why she outta—!

"I appreciate your concern for me, Aubrey, but I'm really not hungry right now," You flip to the next page of your book, a brief flap being heard as a result, "You can leave the plate with me and leave. I'll eat it eventually."

"I- I'm not worry about you!" Aubrey blurts out without thought, her face growing hot.

"Wow, tell me how you really feel."

"Wait! Th- That's not.. I didn't mean to, I.." Why was she getting so embarrassed over this? It's obvious that she cares, I mean, she wouldn't be here otherwise. Why couldn't she just agree with what you said and left? Or better yet, not said anything at all..

She mentally sighs. She really has to work on verbalizing her feelings more like you said..

"Ugh, whatever.. The fact is, I'm not leaving until you eat something.." She ends up grumbling out.

"Well what are you going to do until then. I'm telling you now that I won't be eating anytime.." As you glanced up from your novel, ready to solidify your point by shooting her another glare, you watched on in shock as Aubrey crawled onto your bed and up to you.

"..soon," You're finally able to finish once Aubrey settles herself beside you. You stare at her for a while with an unreasonable expression, simply trying to make sense of her actions before you finally ask, "Uhm, what are you doing?"

"What does it look like I'm doing?" She retorts, even going as far as to roll her eyes, "You said you weren't planning on eating anytime soon so I made myself comfortable. You have a problem with that?"

Oh. She was serious? You didn't think..

"No, I don't mind..I guess," You mumbled, a little embarrassed at how hot your face was just from the simple proximity. You tried your best to hide it by turning your head downwards a bit more, hoping that it would come off as you being really indulged in your book, but really, it just looked like you had bad reading posture..

"So.." Aubrey mumbles after a while of silence, "What's the book about? I noticed you've gotten pretty far so it must be at least a little interesting, right?"

"Oh? It's ( Favorite book/light novel ). It's really good, probably my favorite," Without your knowledge, a small smile begins creeping up your lips, "It has a lot of funny moments actually. Like for example, the main character and their friends did this really stupid thing where.."

You ended up talking Aubrey's ear off about the book for the rest of the afternoon. She didn't seem to mind it. In fact, she seemed pretty engaged in the conversation which was a bit surprising to you.

Rambling on and on about the things that you had already read a million times, you didn't even notice that you had subconsciously eaten the entire slice of pizza until it was gone..

Huh.. Who knew a good talk about something you enjoyed would make you work up such an appetite?

You absolutely despise sick days.

Because of two days. Because you missed two measly days because you felt under the weather, your entire day- no, your entire week has been fucked.

Assignment on top of assignment on top of assignment on top of a ten-thousand word essay, on top of a multi-step project that's all due in a few days. And that's only for one class! You knew it was a bad idea to lay in bed all day not doing anything, especially when you're a college student nearing the end of the year, but you had felt so bad the days prior you couldn't help yourself..

And now, you're stuck at your desk, writing away. Even though you've been at it since early this morning, you've only managed to finish one-third of all your work. This may be because you haven't eaten anything all day and your body hasn't fully recovered from being sick, but it's whatever. You don't have time to worry about yourself right now anyway..

"Hey, babe!" Hero chimed as he walked into your room. Normally, you would've replied with a small 'Hey' or something, but today, you didn't even glance at him much less speak.

"Uhm..babe?" He calls again only to get the same response; silence. It makes him frown at first, but as soon as he notices your open computer and the small stack of papers on the side of you, his frown straightens out a little.

"Would you like some help?" He walks closer, "I don't know much about this subject in particular, but I can at least.." Hero words fail as a rather loud and embarrassing gurgle erupts from your stomach--a little drawn out as it pleads with you to feed it.

"Y/n," Hero calls out, a little more firmly this time, "Have you eaten yet?" For the first time today, you finally force your eyes away from the notes you're writing and glance over at your boyfriend, who was staring at you with furrowed brows and eyes filled with worry.

It almost makes you hesitant to lie to him. Almost. You shake your head yes.

"Are you lying?" He asks, and this time, you decide not to answer him and instead look away from him, focusing back on the assignment at hand. Hero sighs.

"I thought we agreed that you wouldn't do this again.." He mumbles, resisting to spew out the lecture that sits on his tongue. You already seemed stressed out as is, he shouldn't make things worse.

And so, he turns and leaves. You don't know how long he was gone for nor did he tell you where you went, but he made it obvious of his return when he gently snatched your papers away from you and replaced it with a brown paper bag that had the logo of your favorite fast food joint on it.

"I'll give this back to you when you finish eating," He says and you fix your lips to argue with him. You can't afford to take a break after all. If you do now, you'll never get this done in time..

"These are just notes, right?" He clarifies as he grabs your laptop with his free hand, lifting it off your desk with ease, "If so, I can finish this up while you eat."

"But.." You mumble out, but that's all you really have the energy of saying. With your stomach aching, a hunger headache pounding against your skull, and the delicious smell of food taunting you, you can't really do anything besides sigh, nod, and take the food out of the bag.

As you take the first bite and the flavor hits your tongue, you hum in satisfaction before taking another bite and repeating the cycle. As this goes on, Hero watches you with a smile on his face, eventually having to force himself to look away so that he can focus on the computer screen that shines brightly in his face.

Dividers were made by me, pictures used are from Pinterest, post formatting is inspired by @xxsabitoxx

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zombiethingy · 1 year

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20 Questions for fic writers

I've been tagged by @leollyen in this post. Thanks for tagging me and giving me an excuse to ramble a bit! And yeah, that's gonna be an interesting one because I wouldn't necessarily say I am a fic writer. But here we go: 1. How many works do you have on AO3? 2 (both complete, one is anonymous) 2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 4'733 (like I said, not really a fic writer) 3. What fandoms do you write for? Both published works are for Stranger Things but I do have a WIP for Sense8. 4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? Uhm well, the anonymous one has less kudos than the other one... 5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? I think I would or at least try to because as a reader I like to get answers to my comments! 6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Definitely [redacted], that one's anonymous for reasons 7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? The other one obviously. And I think that it would also keep up if we considered my WIPs too - but then again, none of those really have an ending... 8. Do you get hate on fics? Not so far. 9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I'm thinking about it. I've definitely written smut in original things but not yet in fanfic. But one WIPs chapter is literally titled 'horny' so far - so either I'll remove that idea/story line somehow or at least write fade to black... (Or the most likely scenario happens and I'm never finishing that fic...) 10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? Nope. 11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I know of. 12. Have you ever had a fic translated? No. But I've thought about translating my own writing - the things I've written (over) ten years ago in my first language. I actually like the ideas behind them! But also none of them are finished and it's been a while. I'm also not sure how well the language switching would work out. Rewriting in English would probably be easier. 13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? No. 14. What’s your all time favorite ship? In general or to write for? In general it'd be zukki (Zuko, Sokka, Suki from Avatar: the last Airbender). To write for is harder... I've written the most for steddie (Stranger Things) but my heart would probably go with Nomi and Amanita from Sense8. 15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? A longer steddie fic that's been a WIP since the beginning of the year. It's supposed to be kind of a slow burn and therefore needs to be longer and chaptered. But I've only got 1.5 short chapters so far from the 5 or 6 I think it should be at... 16. What are your writing strengths? Funky little ideas, vibes and OCs. 17. What are your writing weaknesses? Writing - as in it's so slow going that I don't really write at all. Research - don't really have the spoons to do that which makes my writing really vage whenever I should have research something. Names - I've got all these OCs but most of them stay nameless... 18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I love to read it! Especially if it's one of the languages I understand or it's translated/made clear by the context. 19. First fandom you wrote for? First published: Stranger Things But I started writing the Sense8 one first and I may have written other stories as a kid/teen before I really understood the concept of fandom 20. Favorite fic you’ve written? It would probably be either the Stranger Things or the Sense8 WIP but since they are WIPs I'll go with the one that's published and not anonymous 🙃 I'd like to tag @lostghosts and @csinnamon-fox - only if you feel up to it and no pressure! But I'd be interested in your takes on those questions :)

#tag game

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raccoon-eyed-rebel · 1 year

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My favorite fic of yours

This was actually not that easy to answer, but in the end I’ll go with 179 Crescent Street. This is how I found you, fell in love with your Mikey and then with all the other guys.

My favorite chapter in my favorite fic of yours

Part 9 - Of Vice and Men - I mean, it’s Mike & Sy… Don’t need to say more

The best character you've written for

Your Mike is just perfect in every tiny bit you wrote for him

The best ship you've written for

Melot & Tamsyn - they are made for one another 🥰

A fic I haven't read yet from you, but I want to

Surfer!Mikey 🥺

Something I remember vividly from reading one of your fics

Me making my most pouty face ever all the while I was reading the first chapter of White Blossoms - I was melting

What made me the most emotional after reading

Part 25 of Fixer Upper - Took me back 14 years to the most important day in my life. And you did so fucking well with this. It is still one of my favorite moments ever in reading fanfiction.

What I like the most about your writing

Your sense of humour. I just love it!

A fic i'm excited for you updating/posting

Everything! For real! I can’t choose what I want you to work on. I need all of it!

A character/ship I didn't enjoy/think about as much before you wrote about them

You ignited my love for Melot, even before I got to read your stuff. But be sure, the way you write him made me fall even harder in love with him

Something I wish/hope you write

That modern au Charles fic you mentioned ages ago

A fic of yours that i've re-read

Uhm, I think there isn’t anything in your masterlist that I haven’t read at least twice. Like, every time I reblog I end up reading it once more. And some I may have read probably ten times or more.

If i've ever shared/talked about your fic to someone else

lol - no - I would never talk about your stuff, or link it when people are talking about Sy teaching Mike how to go down on a woman or even DM spamming other mutuals with your stories. Or maybe I did all of this 😁

A fic I didn't expect to like so much

Making a mess of Mikey - He’s such a subby babygirl - but I love it - why did you make me love a subby babygirl?

A question I have about one of your fics

Under Orders 5 feat. the Captain - When?

Ni.Na. You made me cry. Okay? (I read this when I was in a bad bad mood, you made it better.)

Where do I begin? -- At the beginning? That sounds logical. Ew. Oh well...

I've never been more glad that I got the crazy idea to toss 8 Henry-shaped men into the same house, because I might not have met you if I hadn't done that, and I wouldn't want to miss you <3

A fun fact about 'Of Vice and Men' -- It literally took me so long to write, and I initially hadn't planned on the three of them getting high together, but it just wouldn't happen any other way...

Your Mike is just perfect in every tiny bit you wrote for him

Hihi Thank you! (Which Mike... They're all so different, yet all the same adorable dork, whoops)

I am so glad you're loving Melot and Tamsyn (she was, quite literally, made for him. Hehe) They're so sweet and I love them so much, too...

Surfer!Mikey is 100% still underway - I'm just a little distracted at the moment, but I'm really close to realllyyyy finishing up White Blossoms, and then I hope I can shift my attention to my handsome surfer...

That modern au Charles fic you mentioned ages ago

That's really low on my list of things right now, I'm sorry :( I'll let you know if that ever gets back on the roster!

Making a mess of Mikey - He’s such a subby babygirl - but I love it - why did you make me love a subby babygirl?

Because I am evil, that's why... (I didn't know I'd love subby babygirl Mikey, either, but I think he's so fucking great T0T)

Under Orders 5 feat. the Captain - When?

When I finally figure out what adding Sy will do to the relationship dynamic 🫣 I don't want to half-ass it and I realize it's taking a long time, but I need to get it right, sorry <3\

Cute head scritches for you, my dear non-rodent bestie <3

#ask game #ask response #thank you friend

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birthday-of-music · 1 year

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1-12 FOR THE WRITING ASKS !!! hi :3333

1. What font do you write in? Do you actually care or is that just the default setting?

uhm. i uh. write on the notes app. sometimes on word though and i just use calibri bc default

2. If you had to give up your keyboard and write your stories exclusively by hand, could you do it? If you already write everything by hand, a) are you a wizard and b) pen or pencil?

GOD NO I COULD NOT.. fun fact i never fixed my bad pencil grip when i was really young so i hold pens weird as shit and it hurts after a little while. english exam had me dying every five minutes shaking my wrist out and that was only like 600-700 words i think

3. What is your writing ritual and why is it cursed?

another fun story i used to write about a hundred words every night on my old ipod that i kept in my room before sleeping. said ipod was kind of halfway to exploding. like uh. that one “pillow” post with the dangerous battery. iwdont do that anymore though and i threw out the ipod everything is fine

4. What’s a word that makes you go absolutely feral?

I DONT KNOW UM. in general i have a notebook full of pretty words (ethereal, golden, eternity, that kind of like. overly fancy and poetic shit)

5. Do you have any writing superstitions? What are they and why are they 100% true?

uh. i dont think so im kind of basic

6. What is your darkest fear about writing?

i guess that when i post something people will hate it? like. outright hate it and say its bad and stuff?

7. What is your deepest joy about writing?

i suppose the opposite of the above but also sometimes ill look back at my writing from a year ago that isnt like. in my mind anymore and ill be able to read it and enjoy it as not something i wrote? bc ill forget i wrote it and then i get to enjoy stuff that is extremely catered to me lmao

8. If you had to write an entire story without either action or dialogue, which would you choose and how would it go?

oh dialogue definitely theres something kind of fun about writing stuff without dialogue idk what it just. is.

9. Do you believe in ghosts? This isn’t about writing I just wanna know

uh. nope not really

10. Has a piece of writing ever “haunted” you? Has your own writing haunted you? What does that mean to you?

UM. same as you all the bright places. also the fault in our stars. very clear what types of books i like isnt it. also this fic which is saying a lot because i dont care about genshin anymore but every time i think about it it hurts.

11. Do you believe in the old advice to “kill your darlings?” Are you a ruthless darling assassin? What happens to the darlings you murder? Do you have a darling graveyard? Do you grieve?

uh. i like hurting my faves but only if there is comfort otherwise i die inside. every time i write hurt no comfort i lose a bit more of my sanity

12. If a genie offered you three writing wishes, what would they be? Btw if you wish for more wishes the genie turns all your current WIPs into Lorem Ipsum, I don’t make the rules

i always wish for more wishes but lorem ipsum i could never… three wishes uh. one that every time i write a character i can characterise them right. two that when i proofread i never miss any typos. and three um.. the ability to have continuous motivation to write a multichaptered fic

#asks #☆ reze 彡 #hello :3

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nekomacheercaptain · 2 years

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Thinking of deleting my ao3, so posting some of my fics here - wrote this 1 1/2 years ago damn my writing has changed haha. Anyways, here’s a threesome with Rengoku and Sanemi! <3

Pairing: Rengoku Kyojurou x fem! reader x Shinazugawa Sanemi

Rating: explicit content (18+), NSFW

Word count: 3,4K

Content: female reader, threesome (mfm), oral sex (male and female receiving), facesitting, degradation, praise kink, impact play, marking, anal sex, vaginal sex, double penetration

"Oh, you like that, you fucking slut? Hm? Like feeling fucked out by two guys?" was gasped into your ear, before you felt a breath on your neck, and a set of teeth slowly falling into your skin. The sensation made you clench your teeth, and furrow your brows together.

A hand cupped your chin, and a warm thumb stroked your cheek, "You're doing so good, beautiful". Your eyes forced themselves open through tears and found themselves staring into a set of dark and familiar, wild two-color eyes. The thrusting from behind picked up the pace, making you fall into the arms of the flame pillar.

"Don't get all sappy now, bitch, we're not done yet!" the wind pillar grit through his teeth while giving a hard slap on your ass, forcing a moan out of you.

Your eyes opened slowly feeling yourself being shaken out of your sleep. "Y/n! Are you okay?" Kyojurou's voice yelled into your ear was what made you sit up in the bed. You looked at the men who woke you up, and shot them a confused look.

"What?" you asked them before yawning. Shooting each other an unsure look, Sanemi put his hand on your forehead.

"Mmm feels normal, so you're not sick at least, but you sure are moist," he muttered, looking back at the flame pillar.

"You're not feeling weird? If anything is feeling off, please let us know," the flame pillar asked you, giving you a concerned look. Getting even more confused, you looked back at them in disbelief.

"What is going on?" you almost yelled out, being on the edge of freaking out. Kyojurou placed his hand on your upper arm and shushed calmly at you.

"Shh, it's okay," he started while locking eyes with you, "you just moved a lot in your sleep, and made some.... noises" he explained. Sanemi scoffed and sat down on your bed.

"It wasn't just noises, you sounded like you were on the verge of pain. You were also drenched in sweat, so we had to wake you up," he looked at you, giving you a stern look, “we never know if a demon has a special technique that affects us even after their death," he muttered, "Worst-case scenario, you could become a demon or somehow become dangerous in other ways. We couldn't take the risk," he suddenly looked away.

Kyojurou squeezed your arm, turning your attention back to him. "Do you want to tell us what the problem is? We have to know if it's something we should be worried about," he gave you a reassuring smile.

"Luckily, we're the only people close by," Sanemi added, making you remember that you found an abandoned house you could sleep in after your mission, all of you being exhausted. You suddenly got a flash from your dream, and quickly covered your mouth after letting out a shocked gasp. They both reacted at this, taking a step back. The looks they gave you made you feel inhuman; they looked at you like you could attack any second.

"I-I uhm, I'm okay..." you started, but didn't want to explain the dream to them. Your face fell into your hands in embarrassment. "I-it was just a dream I had.." you whispered.

"Speak louder," Sanemi demanded, making your stomach curl, another flash from the dream showing itself. At this, you turned to look at both of them, an apparent blush on your face.

"I had. A dream." you enunciated, before looking away ashamed.

Sanemi grew a smirk, catching on quickly. "Really? Wanna tell us more about this dream?" he teased you, a mocking tone in his voice.

"Why? It was just a dream," Kyojurou innocently asked, being confused as to why you were so ashamed. Sanemi let out a loud laugh, before clapping the flame pillar on the back.

"You know the sounds she made earlier?" Sanemi asked him, looking at you making yourself smaller in the hopes of turning invisible. Kyojurou only hummed in agreement, waiting for Sanemi to continue, still confused.

"She had a wet dream," he whispered before laughing, making you yelp out and throw yourself under the covers. The flame pillar had a neutral reaction, but chuckled in response.

"That's nothing to be ashamed of, y/n! It's completely natural," he said, wanting to make you comfortable.

"Pffft I don't think she had a wet dream about someone random" the wind pillar scoffed, dragging the covers off of you, "there's a reason she's refusing to face us now," he smirked at you.

Kyojurou suddenly understood the situation, and looked at you wide eyed with a rapidly reddening face.

"You dreamt about us?" he gulped at you. Before you could defend yourself, Sanemi pulled at your feet and dragged you to him at the end of the bed, and pinned you down with your arms above your head. He smirked down at you with dark, lustful eyes.

"Come on, doll, answer him" he said lowly, looking in Kyojurou's direction who was frozen in place. You exhaled deeply, looking into the flame pillar's eyes.

"I-I did dream about you" you yelped out, feeling Sanemi licking up your neck, making you moan out. You managed to muster out "the both of you", and Kyojuoru managed to move from his spot on the floor, to behind you.

"Let's see if we can live up to that fantasy then," Kyojurou whispered into your ear, before kissing your forehead.

Your head rested against the flame pillar’s shoulder, as he toyed your nipples between his finger, whispering sweet nothings into your ear while your other partner licked roughly through your lips and up to your clit, making you rapidly buckle your hips and throw your head over Kyojurou’s shoulder. Sanemi spread your legs wider and pushed them towards your chest, growling at you as a hint for you to hold them yourself. Your fingers felt the heat of his touch as you went to place his hands with yours, and he smirked before sucking harshly on your clit, resulting in a scream ripping through your throat.

“Such a good girl, behaving so well for us,” Kyojurou said softly to you, placing a warm kiss on your head, “and may I add how amazing your breasts are?” he whispered to you while palming and squeezing them, making you let out a low laugh that turned into a moan as Sanemi put a finger into your slick cunt.

“Yeah? You think they’re amazing, you’re gonna lose your shit when you feel this,” Sanemi blurted out with a smirk plastered on his face, “Too bad you only have one pussy though,” he said calmly, pulling his finger out of you, making you sigh.

“Better find another solution,” he grit through his teeth as his finger touched your other hole, making you gasp out at the sensation.

He chuckled, pressing harder, “Is this what you dreamt about, huh? Is this what you want?” he smirked at you, and you could feel Kyojurou’s breath quickly growing more shaky, and the presence of his bulge growing more prominent against your back. Your face flushed red, and you looked away from Sanemi.

He clicked his tongue and started slowly circling his finger while pressing down. The foreign sensation forced you to writhe against Kyojurou, and he groaned at the friction against his cock.

“Use your words, slut,” he grabbed your chin with his other hand, forcing you to look at him. His ministrations on your lower half only increased, forcing tears down your cheeks.

“Yes, please, please, I-I want it!” you yelped out through moans, and Sanemi smirked at the scene in front of him.

“That’s it! I think you can be the perfect little whore for us,” he said as he placed his hands around your throat.

“Now, tell us if you want to stop, no matter when, alright?” Kyojurou told you, stroking your arm. You simply nodded, not sure if you were ready for what you had brought yourself into.

“You’re so wet for us, y/n! Amazing!” the flame pillar exclaimed between your legs beneath you, as you were in the middle of dragging down Sanemi’s underwear. Your cheeks heated up, and before you could protest, Sanemi pulled your hair.

“Get distracted by flame-hair one. More. Time. and you’ll regret it tomorrow,” he warned you and dropped your head. You quickly pulled down his underwear and were faced with his cock. You looked up with a nervous smile to see him grin down at you, before you collected saliva in your mouth, and let it drip onto his cock. Your eyes locked while you put his tip in your mouth and his head rolled back. Kyojurou lapped at your folds and kept circling your clit, making you moan around Sanemi, sending vibrations through his cock. Your breathing was hard to control since you both received and gave pleasure at the same time, something Sanemi noticed. He got a grip on your hair and bobbed your head along his length for you, careful not to be too rough just yet.

Saliva went down your chin, making its way down your neck and chest, the only sounds exchanged in the room being unholy gurgling and wet, slick sounds.

“Good fucking girl, yeah, sucking me off so well,” dark, lustful eyes looking into your tearful ones. Kyojurou currently fucked 2 fingers into you, curling them at just the right spot, making your thighs shake around his face, and almost putting all your weight on him.

Suddenly Sanemi pulled you off and placed himself behind you, allowing you to finally inhale deeply for some much needed air. Strong arms tucked themselves around your thighs, and pushed you lower onto Kyojurou’s face, letting him put his tongue in your cunt, forcing a gasp from you. Taking the opportunity, Sanemi shoved his fingers in your mouth, and you instinctively swirled your tongue around his digits. His other hand grabbed your throat, pushing your back against his chest.

“Now, it’s not fair to only have one option available, is it? And your poor throat can’t handle anymore, I can tell,” he chuckled into your neck, before nipping at your skin harshly, while Kyojurou kept tongue-fucking you, leaving you to shake above him. Sanemi’s fingers found your hole and carefully started opening you, your brows furrowing together and your eyes shut close at the intrusion, and you couldn’t do anything but moan and yelp, and dig your hands in the blond’s hair.

Sanemi pushed deeper into your hole and slowly curled his finger, in order to make your muscles relax. Kyojurou’s heavy breaths could be heard between your legs, and he felt the tension you had in your body. He stroked his thumbs on the insides of your thighs, reminding you that the pillars want you to be comfortable. He lapped at your juices and gave huge, flat licks from your clit and all the way down your lips, and back up again. Every time he reached your bundle of nerves, it made your legs spasm as desperate squeals escaped your throat. Having Kyojurou spoil you and send you to paradise added to the sensation of something up your rear, blessing places that have never been touched, sent you over the edge. Screaming out for them, and pulling Kyojurou’s hair, while Sanemi could feel your walls convulse around his finger, made the pillar’s cocks twitch and they could barely hold back any longer.

“I think she’s ready for us, Kyo,” Sanemi said behind you, and lifted you off the flame pillar’s face, which was drenched in your wetness. As Kyojurou sat himself up he placed his fingers on your lips, and you allowed them in, tasting yourself on them.

You did wonderful, sweetheart,” he told you while caressing your cheek with his other hand, and kissing your forehead.

“Is this still something you want to do, or do you want to stop?” he looked into your eyes, now pulling his fingers out of your mouth, allowing you to answer. Sanemi put his lips against your neck, goosebumps finding their way down your arms.

“Sure you’re ready to take us, hmm? You’ve never done this before, right?” he muttered against your neck, and Kyojurou filled the spot on the other side, nipping at your sensitive skin. The situation and sensations put you off, and giving an answer at the moment didn’t occur to you, until Sanemi bit down on your neck, and you cried out.

“Yes! Yes yes please, I need you both!”. Your encouragement set the pillars aflame, and they threw you on top of Kyojurou, with Sanemi directly behind you.

Kyojurou placed your hands around his neck while giving you an assuring smile.

“Alright, are you ready, sweetheart?” Kyojurou cupped your face in his hand, while his other hand lifted your hips and placed his cock at your entrance.

“You look so beautiful like this,” Kyojurou smiled at you before enveloping his lips with yours, and slowly sinking you down on his cock, as your hands found their way to his hair for some way of keeping your composure.

“You’re such a fucking softie, flame head,” Sanemi teased behind you. Kyojurou only deepened the kiss and bottomed out inside you, “but I guess it would be too much for her if there were two of me,” he continued, giving your right asscheek a hard slap, making you groan against the flame pillar.

A spit could be heard from behind you as something hard was probing your other hole, and your grasp on Kyojurou’s hair tightened. Noticing your nervousness, Kyojurou took hold of your face in his hands and pulled away from the kiss to look into your eyes. As he stroked your cheek, he gave you comforting words, and you fell into his hand while nodding and giving him a small smile. He gave you a small kiss again and gave Sanemi the signal he had been waiting for.

Sanemi pushed slowly into you, and you fell into Kyojurou’s arms, gasping at the unfamiliar feeling. Kyojurou kissed all the available skin in front of him, comforting you.

“I’m barely even inside you, and you’re already falling apart? Guess I just have to make you a good little fucktoy then, huh?” Sanemi grunted while sinking deeper into you. Shutting your eyes, your mouth found Kyojurou’s shoulder, and bit softly into it. The flame pillar groaned, but let out a small chuckle.

“Don’t be afraid, y/n, don’t hold back,” he whispered to you, and you bit harder as Sanemi pushed deeper inside of your canal.

The wind pillar found a slow and steady rhythm as Kyojurou started lifting your hips up and down on his cock, and you hissed at the friction it created against your inner walls. Drool escaped your mouth and fell on Kyojurou as you were being completely filled.

“Look at you, already fucked out,” Sanemi chuckled, “and we’ve barely even started,” he ended with a hard slap on your ass, making you squirm.

Lewd sounds from the wetness Kyojurou created and Sanemi exploited filled the room along with your desperate moans and breaths. Sweat from you dropped down on Kyojurou’s neck, while you laid nearly limp in his arms, almost passing out from all the waves of pleasure washing over you. The only words trembling past your lips were curses and the pillars names. Sanemi picked up the pace, making you push your back upwards while you let out a tired scream.

“Hell. fucking. No. - ngh - You’re gonna keep that back arched, like the good little slut you are,” Sanemi groaned out, pushing on your back aggressively, forming the arch again. You cried out with tears painting your cheeks, one of the only things keeping you grounded was the grip you had on the flame pillars' hair. He started thrusting deeper and slower into you, in contrast to Sanemi. Wild, two-colored eyes met yours, and he wiped away your tears.

“Look at you taking us so well,” Kyojurou breathed out, “you are allowed to cum, sweetheart, please let go for us,» he smiled at you, never failing to hit just the right spots inside you, making you see stars. His right hand touched down your neck, lightly scratching over your nipple and tummy, before finding its spot on your drenched cunt to graze over your sensitive nub. His thumb circled your clit, resulting in bolts of lightning shooting through your weak body, making you gasp and whimper between the two men.

Sanemi slapped your ass again, and the two men kept up their paces. After a few minutes of the flame pillar’s added ministrations, a knot rapidly built up in your tummy, and you were panting into Kyojurou’s neck, moaning out his name, making Sanemi jealous. He gripped your hair, forcing your head backward, still thrusting hard and fast into you. A firm grasp around your throat could be felt, and you became slightly lightheaded.

“There are two cocks inside you, bitch, you better appreciate it,” he warned into your ear, not letting go of the grip around your throat. Seeing your breath change, and becoming less rhythmic, the pillars could see you were close.

Kyojurou switched to two of his fingers, instead of just his thumb, and rubbed your clit more harshly, causing you to squirm under the wind pillar’s grasp. Your legs were shaking, your head was lightheaded and your stomach felt like it was going to explode. Your walls pulsed around the two men as your second orgasm of the night ripped through your body, both of their names being moaned in an all-but-wholesome way. Feeling you like this almost sent the pillars over the edge too. Sanemi’s thrusts and breathing became more erratic and clumsy, until he groaned loudly and thrust himself completely inside of you, keeping still as his seed pumped into you. Kyojurou followed soon after while kissing your forehead, cherishing the feel of your gummy walls milking his cock of every drop he had to offer.

Heavy breaths and the smell of sex filled the room, and Kyojurou brushed your hair away from your face. You gave him a tired and exhausted smile, before letting out a yelp when Sanemi slowly pulled out of you, followed shortly by Kyojurou. Suddenly feeling empty, you cradled yourself in the blond man’s arms and chest, hearing Sanemi fidgeting with something behind you. Both your own and the men’s cum slowly squeezed itself out of you, and you could feel it making its way down your thighs, adding to all the build-up of slick from your previous actions.

“You did amazing, y/n, such a good girl,” Kyojurou whispered softly to you, as he wrapped his muscular arms around you, hugging you closer to his body while you felt your heart flutter.

“Please let me know if there’s anything you want me to do, alright?” he added, and you only had the energy to give a small nod against his chest.

Sanemi came back with wet cloths, and washed up all the bodily fluids off of you, making sure to clean through your folds.

“Your body’s fucking beautiful, y/n,” Sanemi chuckled while praising you, for a change, “and although it doesn’t have to be said, I just want to clarify that I in fact do NOT view you as a slut or whore, those pet names are just for fun,” he sat down beside you and stroked down your back softly. Hearing him not angry felt weird to you, but you didn’t have the energy to tease him about it.

“Well, all those marks on your neck will be your problem to cover up in training,” he laughed out to break the tension, comfortable with the tension that had been created. And he made you realize how fucked you must’ve looked.

“I think it suits you! I wouldn’t mind painting your skin again some time,” Kyojurou added, admiring all the purple marks on your neck, while Sanemi proudly smiled at his handprints on your ass.

“Yeah, me neither, let us know when you’re ready to make new ones,” Sanemi stroked over the marks he created, and chuckled lowly to himself, before picking up the duvet.

“Alright, lay in the middle, y/n, Kyo’s had you for himself long enough, so let me get a share,” he commanded you, yet he gave you a small smirk.

Kyojurou gave you one last kiss before he laughed and placed you next to him and Sanemi. They both wrapped themselves around you once the duvet was on, and you fell asleep instantly, a satisfied smile resting on your lips.

Not my best work, but I love threesomes and this was the very first one I wrote, so… posting part 2 soon! Thank you for reading and hope you enjoyed it!

Tags: @hawkix @unsuretater-simp

If you want to join my taglist, you can find it here!

#rengoku kyojuro #rengoku x reader #shinazugawa sanemi #sanemi x reader #rengoku x reader x sanemi #sinful #demon slayer #demon slayer x reader #my work #x reader

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isleofair · 11 months

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Twenty Questions for Fic Writers!

I was tagged by @nicoroni (and I am also tagging them back 💙) (Trust us, it works. )

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

12 as of a couple of days ago! 🥰 2 are from last year and 10 are my progress so far in the 2023 - Year of the OTP Challenge (my beloved 💖)

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

212,706 (that's about a Moby Dick's worth of words! 😦)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Just Tiger & Bunny, and just FireSky as a pairing, at that! (Who knows if I'll ever branch out... for now I'm very happy in my little corner of the fanfic world 🥰)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

The best cure for free fall (3,295 words) Kudos: 87

Stereoscopy (The Hero's Shoulders) (72,000 words) Kudos: 74

Three Dates (8,854 words) Kudos: 40

Snowdrift (3,050 words) Kudos: 37

Love, Counted along the Fibonacci Sequence (7,123 words) Kudos: 28

(These numbers may not look like much, and perhaps they are not, but considering I write a side ship in a small fandom, I am honestly incredibly grateful for literally every single one of these 🙏💕)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I probably respond too much to comments, if anything 😅 I cherish them immensely, so I tend to get a little carried away, and I try to answer every single thing that people say in them 🥺💙

6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Oh. Uhm. I only really do happy endings, so... let me think.

Technically, the story that leaves the most angst still on the table by the end is Stereoscopy (The Hero's Shoulders), because there are some not-totally-solved things left in the background.

The one where the angst lingers closest to the end as a feeling, though, possibly enough to leave a tiny taste-memory of it in your mouth, might be To a Steadfast Heart, or possibly Second Song.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Oh, gosh. I suppose it depends on how you define happiest...

The most triumphant and satisfying ending I've done plot-wise, in my opinion, is hands-down Intertidal's.

If you're going more by something like "how much pink glitter and marshmallows is the final scene conjuring in my brain", though, it might be Love, Counted along the Fibonacci Sequence, or maybe An Honest Mistake, or Asterism (I write a lot of pink-glitter-and-marshmallows endings, sorry.)

8. Do you get hate on fics?

The haters would have to know little old me exists for me to get hate, lol. But more seriously, no, I get nothing but sweetness and I'm so grateful 💖💖💖

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Welll... I never quite mean to, but sometimes the story (and characters) ends up asking for it/needing it, and I'm so bad at saying no 😅

As for what kind... the kind that can have a 10k, E-rated chapter solely dedicated to the characters having sex, without me ever having to pick a word for "dick", lol (No, there's no trashy euphemisms, either; it's just me, my deep embarrassment, Keith Goodman's Very Polite POV, and synecdoche, my beloved, against the world 😂)

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I haven't, and I don't think I'm terribly interested in trying (never say never, of course, but for now I can't think of any that I'd want to write). AUs and/or fusions, on the other hand, are very interesting and I'm farily sure at some point I'll end up writing one.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Again, they'd have to notice the fic to steal it 😅 (Of course, it might have happened without my knowledge, but I don't see why anyone would steal unpopular fics. And besides, it would have to either be posted on a website I don't look at, or modified to be other characters, because "my" ship tag on ao3 is far too small to hide anything in there, lol)

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No. (I'd make a joke about them being translated from the Italian in my head to the English on the page, but I think them up in English in the first place, so it wouldn't really apply 😅)

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, but I've "co-written" a lot of concepts/headcanons in chats and I always have an absolute blast doing that! (I'm not entirely sure I could ever co-write a fic, honestly, because I'm a bit of a control freak about my creations, and I'd probably get insufferable during the process)

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

The only one I write, lol: FireSky!!! ❤️💜 AKA Keith Goodman/Nathan Seymour, or Sky High/Fire Emblem from Tiger & Bunny (... their hero names ship name looks like a pretty crazy crossover, lol)

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Ooof. I only have two real wips on my hands; the one I have more doubts about ever finishing is the one I was trying to write for the September leg of the 2023 YOTP Challenge (for which I ended up writing a different story altogether). It has very unconvincing logistics, and I don't know if I'll ever be able to fix that to my satisfaction.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Mmmh. I've gotten a fair bit of compliments about my characterization, so that's one, I suppose. I've also been very good so far at only writing one fic at once and actually finishing almost all of them (which is not nothing!) I also really like my metaphors/similes/analogies/symbolism a lot, especially in dream sequences, but I don't know if that's objectively a strength or just something I do well (mostly) only to my personal satisfaction.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I used to be good at not having run-on sentences, but I've gotten so much worse about it lately?!? I really need to check myself on that. And I think I'm not very good at coming up with complex plots (one initial premise to kick things off, and then following the flow from there? Doable. Several significant events actually shaping the story from more than one side? SAVE ME.)

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Well, if the characters were speaking another language for some reason I suppose I might, but I'm only fluent in two languages, so unless I could find someone who could help me, I would probably try to avoid the issue altogether somehow.

I also think it's not an easy thing to handle, because if the reader is not supposed to understand, a few words and phrases here and there, that maybe get explained/translated in-story at the moment or later, are okay; but huge chunks that the reader can't understand would just be annoying, and if they're supposed to understand, you need to fit a translation in along with the foreign dialogue, and it might not always be easy to do so in an efficient / not cumbersome manner.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Mh. If we want to be really precise about this, I think somewhere in my parents' house is a tiny notebook with a lilac (or possibly pale pink) cover, where a strange, short scene set after the Season 1 finale of Smallville is written in pencil. But that was a one-off thing.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Stereoscopy (The Hero's Shoulders) will always and forever be my baby; it's the one I poured the most time and soul and effort into, and the one that I consider, in a way, the definitive fic I could write for that pairing.

I do feel like I have to mention Intertidal, as well, though: it's by far my favorite of the rest my fics, and I think it has a lot to offer.

This was a lot of fun! 😃 My dear fellow writers, if you see this and you want to do it, too, I am officially tagging you! 💚

#writing #tag game #my fic #tiger & bunny #firesky #nathan seymour #keith goodman

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kiliinstinct · 11 months

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20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thanks for tagging me! @celestialtitania

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

56 and uhh.. wow. I guess if we include my Genshin account that would be 58? Wait! My Psued also has some so the total is actually - 74! Damn, that's more than I was expecting actually.

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

This is also going to take some calculating...

okay, the total from my mainaccount and it's pseud and my genshin account: 388,886. Kinda blew my mind to see that total lol

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Mainly Fairy Tail, but I've dabbled in Yu Yu Hakusho, Yuri On Ice, Naruto, Legend of Zelda and have begun to write for Genshin Impact!

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Imma count this down- first being the lowest to the highest.

Soft Caress with 234 Kudos

Wake Up Call with 474

Have You Missed Me? 390

Flame's Desire 702

Mistletoe Claim with a total of 1284 Kudos. (and i still don't understand WHY!?)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

It's 50/50. I like to reply when I can, but sometimes I'm in a rush or busy (or half asleep) when I see the comment and then completely forget about it until later. By then I feel awkward replying. ^^;;

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Uhh, I haven't.. ended.. the angstiest fics yet. But, since you're looking for an ending, I guess Sun in the Rain ? Since it's dealing with grief and loss of parents?

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

How is this even harder for me to think of? Uhm, maybe I'll go with Fire Sprite No. 5 ? But there's a few others up there, I think.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I'll be honest, hate is very rare on my fics. (And I'm very grateful for it.) Usually I just have people pressuring me to update and guilt tripping me rather than outright hating on a fic. And some of the hate I received years ago is just funny to me. The worst one I ever got I just ignore because it was hardly worth my time.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes and.. the smut kind? (I do not understand the question o.o)

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Only one! And for some reason I never posted it to A03 .. that's weird, I could have sworn I had. Anyway! The Forgotten Temple was a NatsuxLevy fic crossed over into the world of Breath of the Wild that I wrote for a friend. It's the only crossover I've ever done.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Once that I'm aware of! The Matching Scale had one person come to me to let me know someone had stolen it, but the fic was deleted days later. There's one other multi-chapter out there that's based off of it, but that writer got my permission to use the plot before they posted it.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I've been asked 3 different times if someone could translate, but never saw the end result of that. I'm totally down for people to translate my work if they ever wanted to though. Just so long as it's credited and linked to the original.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes.... and no... and.. yes? Okay, there's a few of them but they're not finished so I was never able to post them... Ahem...

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

... Favorite? I'm supposed to have one all-time favorite? Seriously? No. Can't be. There's no way. I've got too many to pick one above all else.

My current Hyper Fixation is TravelerxXiao from Genshin Impact. (Though I'm partial to AetherxXiao rather than Aether's twin sister version of that ship.) Nalu is the one that gave me the most inspiration in Fairy Tail, but I also have a few crack ships that I adore in FT as well, Like CobraxLevy (Or FreedxLevy.. or.. there's a lot of Levy ships don't judge me.) and GrayxLoke. Then there's Sesskag in the Inuyasha fandom... Zelink in Zelda... Zutara in ATLA... and let's not get me started on characters I ship in books or I'll be here all day/night.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

As far as I'm concerned, every single published wip that I have not listed as discontinued WILL BE FINISHED. I'm determined to ensure they are. As for the unpublished ones though.. there's two that I don't think are going to make it outside of the planning and partial writing stage.. which is kinda sad to think about, but I simple can't add more to my plate than I already have.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I'm told I'm good at keeping characters ic even in au settings, so I guess I can see that's a strength, but covering the emotions and inner workings of a characters mind is probably where my biggest strength is. If there are any others.. well.. you tell me?

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Description- especially if I'm mixing it in dialogue- or trying to remember when I need to at least give the reader some idea of how a character looks. I get so worried about over describing that I end up not describing enough at all! It's a problem.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Eh, if it's like.. for the setting, where some characters use a different language and don't know the main one, I think it works if done well. Especially if you're trying to show someone who's bilingual. If it works for world building and has been done well, then I'm not going to complain. Asides from that, I usually avoid it and get thrown out of the story when I see it .

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Yu Yu Hakusho and Inuyasha... on an old old old account that you will never, and I mean NEVER, find.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

Uhhh... there's that word again. How can I just pick one child over the other? (Flame's Desire.) I can't just pick favorites like that when I have children running around all wanting attention from me - (Flame's Desire.) It would simply be unfair to pick one above the others when they're all so near and dear to my heart - (Flame's Desire.)

Anyway, I'll go with Flame's Desire, as well as the current Genshin Fic I recently wrote and am still editing so it's not posted yet. lol

Tagging, but you don't have to do it.

@pencilofawesomeness @thehylianidiot @genavere @classysassy9791 @phoneboxfairy @grayseyebrowscar @cobrakiin @sandwitchstories @teleiapotami + anyone who wants to steal this

#Kili Talks #fanfiction asks #a03 asks #thanks for tagging me!!

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annawayne · 1 year

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(you do write, so you are a writer-writer, and a fantastic one even♡)

ok so for the ask game: 🥺🎢🛒💖🦅🤭🧠(annie) and ✨️

Thank you so, so much, both for asking and for your words T___T

🥺 Is there a certain type of moment or common interaction between your characters that never fails to put you in your feels?

Oh, yes. This is THAT moment when one character is in danger and another one just is so lost in emotions and feelings. It works for me both in canon and in my writing. I think, that situations like these open up what REALLY a character feels and thinks because this is the question of life and death.

🎢 Which of your fics would you call your wildest ride?

It's definitely "Bury Me in the Shadows of Spring" because the plot here is emotional damage ™. It's so dense with feelings, so sometimes when I reread my plot outline, I feel like my heart is broken.

🛒 What are some common things you incorporate in your fics? Themes, feels, scenes, imagery, etc.

I already answered it here, so I'm just referring to this answer :)

💖 What made you start writing?

Oh… I guess, my love for literature in general. I wrote some "original" stuff a long time ago when I was 11–15 years old, and I was really engaged in the process, of how the only power of words building the whole world! Then, I even wrote a whole "original" story when I was 18, it has like…~200k words? (I never published it and never will). It has two parallel plot-lines, one is the diary that describes the events of the past, and the second one is the present. Two lines collide when the "present" one finds the diary, and the mystery of their world becomes larger and larger, heh. The diary line due to some event has no stars and the "endless" night, so it has a lot of reference to the constellations and stars. It's actually called "Through the corridors of stars" (yeah, I love pathetic titles...) But after that, I didn't write anything. When I opened the world of fan fiction back in 2020, all these years I had a will to start writing again, but this time publish it. It took me 2,5 years to overcome the fear and the stupid uncertainty to start writing in English, so here I am!

🦅 Do you outline fics or fly by the seat of your pants?

Oh, always outline! Before starting BMSS I wrote a whole separate doc with each chapter and key events. Also, I marked some specific details for the chapter structure as Annie's chapters are colorful, it always has a lot of references to the art itself + the title of her chapters is the actual painting title, and the whole chapter in Annie's POV is built around this canvas. In Armin's we have a more lyrical, wordy style, he has more inner reflections. Their mutual POVs chapters have their titles mixed, and so are the styles of their narration :)

As for one-shot, it goes the same way. Key points, some key topics (as I like to choose a few leading topics and to look at them from different angles and POVs).

🤭 Do you have a favorite tag to use when posting your works?

(Author hates it)

This is, the tag. Describes me very well :DDD

🧠 Pick a character, and I'll tell you my favorite headcanon for them. (Annie)

I always agree about Annie being the one who is struggling to show her feelings properly, but for the same reason, I find her the one who can be incredibly soft once she is certain nobody would hurt her. And also I feel like she is emotionally deprived, so once she learned not only to be the receiver of attention and affection, but also a giver…oh my, this girl will shower you with all these adorable things, but SMALL once, It's not big romantic dates, but mundane and ORDINARY things that, maybe, are even more precious.

✨ Give you and your writing a compliment. Go on now. You know you deserve it. 😉

My limit on self compliments is already dead with this answer, but…uhm, Ann, please, calm down and enjoy the process. You're doing great and something that you wanted for so long, be proud of yourself, goddammit :D

#ask #answered ask #writing #my writing

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hazelestelle · 1 year

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29. Share a bit from a fic you’ll never post OR from a scene that was cut from an already posted fic. (If you don’t have either, just share a random fic idea you have that you don’t plan on getting to.)

Okay, so this is from a fic that I wrote for my friend Tony years ago. It was part of my "Ringo deserves better"-phase, and I'm redacting the other name. I never posted it, because the fandom would have killed me XD But I still love this scene a lot, so here you go:

The next morning, they are indeed cuddling when they wake up. Ringo is on his side, and [redacted] is curled around him, and he thinks that’s fitting because it feels a little bit like protecting Ringo from the world.

Then Ringo stirs, and turns around to face him and [redacted] smiles, because his bed hair looks ridiculous. “Morning! How are you feeling?”

“Morning. A little better, thank you.” He smiles slightly, then he frowns. “Hey, can I ask you something?”

When [redacted] nods, he continues: “Are you even into men?”, and [redacted] is surprised, because that is definitely not what he expected.

He frowns. “Uhm, yeah. Why?”

Ringo shrugs. “I dunno. You’ve been with Kira, and Leonie, and other women...”

“Yeah, so have you”, he counters, then adds, grinning slightly. “Well, not Kira, I hope.”

Ringo wrinkles his nose. “Eww, no! This is not game of thrones! But okay, I get your point. It’s just...” He sighs. “Yesterday, when I kissed you, you didn’t… I mean, you could have had me...”

Ah, so this is what his question is about. “I know. And me turning you down definitely didn’t have to do with not wanting you. But you were hurt, and looking for distraction, and you would have regretted it in the morning.”

Ringo smiles ruefully. “I guess. But I just don’t understand you. Why do this? You get nothing out of it.”

“I get to be your friend. That’s not nothing. That’s a lot, actually.” [redacted] smiles, and wow, did Ringo just blush?

He tries to cover it up with a grin though. “That was cheesy.”

[redacted] shrugs. “Maybe. Anyway, why don’t you go get a shower and I order breakfast from room service. With lots of coffee, of course.”

“Sounds great.” Ringo gets up to go to the bathroom, and if [redacted] watches his backside, well, he allows himself that much.

#yes i wrote 4000 words for an audience of 1 person #i don't think i have any other fics i never posted #if you were hoping for nixen au sorry i have nothing written there #thank you for asking!#isa talks #fanfiction

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akaluan · 2 years

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Weird questions for writers: 4, 19, 32?

4: a word that makes you go absolutely feral

Oh geez, uhm... Honestly I don't think I really have one? Or at least not one that Lingers. I have some Emotions about the word "prejudice" but that's because of the standard "kid forced to read aloud in class has never heard word spoken before and makes educated guess based on English rules and guesses Very Wrong and Gets Laughed At" thing but like.. honestly that's just grumpy, mostly. I get grumpy about words that I have to type a lot, especially if they're longer words that I have problems spelling, but.. honestly nothing really sticks in my mind, lol

19: writing journey

ALRIGHT KIDS BUCKLE UP--

Okay but seriously it's not really that spectacular.

I lived on a farm in the middle of nowhere and wrote and drew to entertain myself until the internet actually became A Real Thing I Could Access around about when I was ten. I joined IRC rping channels like a year later, crafted myself a FASCINATING persona I'm pretty sure everyone and their brother saw thru, continued rping with those same people for years, found a Early Form of what would eventually become known as the Nexus (shout out to the best tiny art/writing community ever. The dragons are definitely the second best bit) and proceeded to go absolutely hogwild with terrible cliche characters and stories and DRAGONS until college basically killed all of our free time and the community went into hibernation, was in the process DEEPLY traumatized by witnessing the bullshit Anne McCaffrey's lawyer put some members of the community thru when I was Very Young (this is out of order, the trauma happened when I was a wee lil hatchling just lurking along the edges of the community, but eh, it Lingers ya know?) and proceeded to be 1000% gunshy about fanfiction for the better part of like 15 or so years before a friend finally convinced me to post the first chapter of Dragon Eclipse.

Oh and the Nexus came out of hibernation like two years ago and I would not have survived the pandemic without them. Moving on.

32: a line from a poem/novel/fanfic etc that you return to from time and time again

So I have really shit specific memory so I don't actually have Specific Lines or anything (I cannot quote anything verbatim and have never been able to) but honestly I wanna say that Tamora Pierce's Tortall and Mercedes Lackey's Valdemar have meant a great deal to me growing up and that they still do now. There's a lot of Hope in those stories, and the characters resonated with me a lot and still do.

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tealeavesandthorns · 1 year

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Question for muns thing - 1, 3, 4, 5, 11, 14

QUESTIONS FOR MUNS.

1. how do you feel about reblog karma?

I mean... a bit conflicted if I'm honest but then I always have been. On the one hand I think it's good to practice. If you reblog a meme that's just questions, go ahead and send one over to the person, even on anon. However sometimes you don't have the relationship with people for certain memes or maybe you have too many threads going. It's why I love drabbling certain things. I do think though if you've followed someone or stumbled on their blog and you abuse the meme tag a bit or never send them a starter or try to interact with them (specifically if YOU follow THEM), but reblog all the memes. I can completely understand why that could be a bit annoying. So honestly... conflicted haha. Good in theory but vastly more complicated in practice.

3. whose writing has impacted your writing style the most? (you can choose anyone! famous writer or not.)

Uhm, I'm not sure tbh five years ago I'd have said an author I no longer will name. However I would say that mostly my writing has been hugely influenced by all the movies I watch, far more than the books I've read. I tend to go off feeling when I'm writing, rather than focusing on the actual words... I don't know if that makes sense haha.

4. which muse of yours is your all time favorite? if you stopped writing them: why?

Honestly I think Maria is my all time favourite, she's been with me the longest and she's so different to me and it's quite nice to write. I think she makes me a better person too. I'm sure she was the first muse I really wrote. I think after Maria it was probably Charlie, the OC Secretary I created for Kingsman who was known as the Dragon and her codename was Kilgharrah. I absolutely adored writing her, she was so fun and so complex. I dropped out of the kingsman fandom, I don't remember why, I don't think I could quite keep up with things but yeah, I think she's my second favourite.

5. is there a muse you really want to try? if yes: what’s stopping you?

I mean I'd LOVE to give Evelyn Carnahan a go. I love her so goddamn much. I think loving her so much is what stops me because I'm not sure I could really do her justice. I'd love to be able to play Moneypenny but I definitely couldn't do a good job of her.

11. describe your ideal outcome/endgame for the muse you are currently writing. if you are a multimuse blog: do this for your current favorite muse, or the muse of the last reply you posted.

Maria x Happiness. I mean isn't that the idea outcome for everyone's muse. Well maybe villain muses it's like taking over the world or something but I mean Maria x Happiness is always the end goal tbh. Just happiness all the time is no fun though so there of course is everything else you can write and it's so fun!

14. which roleplay community has been your favorite to write in?

I think overall in all the fandoms I've ever been in, it was probably a toss up between Star Trek and Kingsman.

#;answered #;munday meme #;aboutmun

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the-doomed-witch · 2 years

Note

Ok, after some "post-reading-smut time alone"... now I can properly answer you with my fangirling attitude 🤭

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH - FINALLY!!!

Thank YOU for that. So damn good... SO FUCKING DAMN GOOOOOD. Tell me there is a part 2. Pretty please, tell me.. come on.. she is so dreamy to be a stand alone kind of thing.....

First: I cannot unsee Olsen in a air-hostess uniform... is burned in my mind.

Second: Holy mama...mommy/daddy play is just so.. 👌

Third: yes to oral in the crew seat, yep, yep.. totally worth the googling "where do they seat on an airplane" mishap...

Uuuh, I liked to know I have requests freedom! Don't give me too much opening, I will use it 🤭. Oh, I have so many... let me get my best one forward and I will send you later.. (claps excitedly)

About reading my fics... uhm.. hard pass. 😂 I am joking. I will get off anon and DM you one of this days - you are so nice to talk to 😊. I am writing one for Lizzie. But is far from over.

GOOGLE CAN BE SO DAMN STUPID! Like.. just ANSWER ME! Sometimes I feel like it is mansplaning me.. 😅

No new dehli? Really? Where I would stay is so very nice! My cousin lived there for... like... 10 years? Maybe is because it was a very fancy place 🤣. His photos are extraordinary! But thanks for the advice ;) I will definitely consider it when I am ready to board on a 24hour wanda-less flight 😂

Oh, I am sorry. I shouldn't have anticipated your suffering :x... I had nightmares about balance sheets not matching for years.. hahaha. I can TOTALLY see you doing 34 pages of ledgers by hand. That was a very weird phase in life for me :x.

Well, my biology is more into human anatomy and physiologic, buuut mitochondria being a gift from your mother ... who gots from you grandma, and after grandma.. and so on..is so poetic. Hahaha my geek feminist side showing...

Ok, NOW I AM INTERESTED. We need to exchange smuts indications one of this days.... 😗

My god, exactly!! And I thought I was in a very dark path when I got to know slight smut.. then I stumbled on midnightcrimson and Wanda a few weeks ago? Is safe to say my soul if on the line to take the lift down to hell. 🤣

(Arrrgh, how can I add a freaking image here?? I got a Lizzie doing yoga one!! 😒)

. .

JUBGBKDDJHJKGB 😭😭😭 i’m so so glad that you liked it anon! 🖤🖤 i’m not sure if i’ll have a part two, but i am planning a small drabble in continuation about the strap-on 🫣 still, not very sure because one thing abt me is i suck at series or multiple parts of a story 🥲

olsen in an air hostess uniform yes. yes exactly. you seriously get me. that’s what i had in my mind the whole time 🤤 sitting in the crew cabin and eating out wanda? COUNT ME IN!

also!!!!! i’ll be eagerly waiting for your request <333 & enthusiastically waiting to read your fics!! 🖤

google a mansplainer? YOU ARE SO REAL FOR THIS. like my dudes don’t try to explain me shit #GenderfluidBossing (because girlbossing sounds very gender dysphoric to me hehe)

delhi has deteriorated a LOT over the time, the air quality index has risen to a very disturbing amount… if you plan on coming here then i suggest you to do a bit of a research, because it’s seriously dangerous. nothing is more dangerous than a flight with wanda tho. iykwim

34 pages is an understatement 😭🥲 the last time i wrote an accounts exam, i used up 70+ pages in three hours! queue this genre of taylor swift lyrics:

human anatomy is my only strong topic in the entirety of biology. reminds me of the time i scored 50/50 in science in 7th grade 💀😭🤣 yeah no i’ll never forget that, it was the smartest in science i could ever be! but scientific poetry can consume my heart. the thing is, i love learning about science but for academic purposes is a no.

a geek feminist? you’re like a billion times more iconic to me. i am a geek feminist too. but more of in a way where they should allow people who menstruate to have considerate holidays and exam timings. having cramps while writing a stupid ass 20 mark test should be banned fr😐

the moment i started reading smut i only confirmed my place in hell. i haven’t spared myself. funny part is, i cannot even stop thinking about it 😩 sometimes when i cannot sleep i keep thinking abt smut …should i be concerned?

if you have a pinterest link to the image, you can link it to the text :)

(again, i’m so sorry, i geniunely forgot to answer the ask!)

#skye answers #anon ★#. . anon <3

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lloftvlly · 4 years

Text

MysMe Characters in a Zombie Apocalypse Headcanons

Here I go again. I like zombie moves/shows and mysme so I figured I wanna combine them.

All the headcanons under the cut because this became long!

Yoosung

Scared boy ™

Yet shows strength when he has to protect you

Cries as he runs away from zombies

Also cries and/or gags when he sees the gory stuff

Builds contraptions to keep zombies out of your camp / hide-out

Which never rly work... but it’s the thought that counts

Always compares every situation to video games he played

And can sometimes even come up with useful plans due to his experience with post apocalypse setting video games

But whines a lot about how “this is way harder than it looked like in xx game”

Ready to die for you and thus ends up doing unnecessary dangerous stuff, so the group has to often stop him to do the dumb thing.

“I’m not a child anymore I WANT to protect MC TOO!”

Weapon of choice: a sword like his favorite video game character even if he’s clumsy in using it. So he ends up reaching for a simple gun when he finds himself in a dire situation.

Knows recipes of post apocalypse type foods and cooks for the group.

If you’re bitten by a zombie he falls into complete denial and firmly believes you won’t turn because he can’t accept you leaving him like that.

Jaehee

You didn’t expect it but she suddenly turns into a very capable apocalypse warrior

When she doesn’t kick ass, she researches about the outbreak and comes up with theories to potentially one day find a cure

Keeps the group organized even in chaotic times

Always able to come up with plans when the group finds itself in dangerous situations

Call herself your sidekick but it feels more like you’re her sidekick

Doesn’t trust any new people at all, if someone wants to join your group they have to get through Jaehee first (and most times don’t manage to do that.)

Scavengers from outside groups always underestimate her and then end up getting their ass kicked.

Keeps an organized list of how many zombies and how many people (in self defense) she has killed. She feels guilty for the people side of the list, even if it was in self defense every time.

Makes you feel the most safe when you are on errand runs together.

She sees and hears EVERYTHING so no zombies or people can approach you unnoticed. She’s just always really alert.

Weapon of choice: her own martial arts skills and if necessary uses a machete to assist her.

Always tired, yet always on top of her game when the situation requires it.

If you’re bitten she wants to make the last moments for you as comfortable as humanly possible, while she closely stays by your side. She’ll act tough to not show her own pain and will not show you her tears because she wants you to see her strong in your last moments to make you feel at peace with leaving her behind.

Jumin

Leader of the group even though he never signed up for this

The group just suddenly decided he would be the most level headed for that position and for Jumin it would be too much trouble to decline

Negotiates with other groups you meet on the road and often gets some good trades for supplies done

Surprisingly is a good fighter when he has to put down a zombie or two

Really knows how to shoot a gun and land a head shot after the other for some reason ( he probably had private shooting classes before the apocalypse for fun)

Sighs yet composed when blood gets on his fresh white shirt

Where does he get all these clean white shirts from?

Way too clean for someone who lives in a world that ended.

If he has to kill other people who seem to be a danger to your group he will do so without hesitation and zero regret, they had it coming.

Weapon of choice: a simple yet powerful handgun

Sometimes makes questionable choices and tries to control the group too much to keep track of everyone.

He means it well for everyone’s safety but it can be too much.

But when you tell him he does things wrong he gets soft and is willing to listen to you when you advice him on doing things differently.

This is making you somewhat of the right hand of the leader.

If you’re bitten he gets too emotional about it to asses the situation and you end up being the one comforting him because he loses his fucking mind.

Zen

Looks bomb even after 5 days on the road without a shower

Still somehow manages to hold a somewhat proper meal plan

And gets enough sleep cos “his skin needs it”

Protects you always! And never lets you out of sight if he can avoid it.

Gets way too comfortable with shady strangers you meet on the road

But if someone of these strangers becomes a danger to you, doesn’t think twice before cutting their throat

On supply runs he brings back shampoo, beer and magazines instead of things like canned food and water

He avoids fighting whenever he can to keep his hands clean, but if he has to do it, he’s very capable and smooth

Weapon of choice: a katana

Looks like a beautiful warrior when he fights

His long hair gets in the way sometimes and can cause zombies grabbing at it but he WON’T cut it EVER. Sacrifices are to be made in the name of beauty.

The members of your group all somehow rely on Zen for emotional support in rough times because he knows just the things to say to make everyone feel better and never stops being positive even after the world was literally ending.

Nothing seen of this positivity however, when it’s about Jumin.

Yes, he is not okay with Jumin being the leader but also doesn’t do anything about it, even if it causes him to nag sometimes.

If you’re bitten he will blame himself forever for not protecting you better and go on a rampage to kill every zombie within a 10 mile radius to let out his frustration. One of them hurt you, so all of them must die.

Seven

Runner of the group, meaning he does most of the supply runs, goes out to clear roads and check locations and safety thereof

Somehow became always that guy of the group everyone looks at when they discuss about needing a member to do something that’s ridiculously reckless. Because “its Seven, he’ll manage.”

And will do everything the group asks from him, because what does he have to lose?

Most reckless of the bunch but also luckiest of the bunch, always gets away completely unharmed no matter what dumb risky thing he does.

Still you worry about him a lot for his lack of self-preservation, but don’t tell him you do or he’ll get mad at you.

Boy knows all the little secret pathways, hideouts and escape routes.

Also comes up with clever inventions he can make out of random junk he finds. It really helps out the group

Zombie puns all day everyday “ Zombodie had to do it.” “That’s a no-brainer” “You undead all your good work” “Don’t outbreak my heart.”

Tries to avoid killing or fighting off zombies to save his energy for other things. He’s more into being stealthy when he has to get shit done.

But when he has to, he will be pretty good in getting rid of a handful zombies.. :

Weapon of choice: a wooden baseball bat with nails sticking out of it.

He likes it, it makes him look badass

Tries hard to avoid getting emotionally attached to you or anyone in the group because you all could die at any moment and there’s no point.

But slips into caring too much about you and the group anyway

If you’re bitten he will have an emotional break first but then quickly start to think of ways to save you, no matter how. And if he has to chop off the infected body part to see if it works he will do so.

Saeran [ Unknown ]

Not part of your group but always knows where you all are and what you are doing.

Instead belongs to this other surviving group that ordered him to keep an eye on yours.

Comes out of nowhere when you’re in a situation where you can’t defend yourself from a group of zombies to save your ass.

But will be gone again before you can even thank him. He only did it because he needs you alive anyway.

At least that’s what he tells himself. Although he starts caring for you for some reason.

And really wants to bring you back to join his own group instead of sticking with the RFA.

You get very interested in this masked stranger but your questions remain unanswered because he keeps his distance to continue to watch from afar.

Casually uses zombie blood, skin and guts to camouflage himself when he has to walk through herds of them.

He is a skilled assassin who was trained to get the job done.

Weapon of choice: a simple hand knife in close range and a full-on automatic rifle for when it’s about killing many zombies at once.

Will use either of the weapons not only on zombies but on other humans, with the same lack of hesitation, if they piss him off.

Biggest kill count of them all.

If you’re bitten he won’t even think twice before grabbing a sharp tool to chop off your infected body part if it’s in a location that can be removed. If it’s not he might wait for you to turn and keep you as a zombie pet.

The original leader of the group who mysteriously vanished about 10 days into the outbreak.

It’s because he’s been infiltrating the other mysterious group to gain information on them just to find out his ex is the leader of this other group.

Thus is stuck between two groups and because of that became a solo-surviver without really a group to belong to.

Elegant fighter. Will knock down 5 zombies gracefully without a single drop of sweat.

Sometimes picks up helpless stranded survivors on the streets and allows them to travel with him and protect them until he finds them a save community to join.

Weapon of choice: a makeshift wooden spear with a blunt end for humans and a pointy end for zombies.

Pacifist who will never kill another human, even if they tried to kill him first.

But never hesitates even a second before killing a zombie.

Probably saved your ass from the distance a few times without you knowing.

Leaves water and food on your hideout doorstep in secret when he knows your group is low on supplies because he never stops taking care of all of you from the shadows.

If you’re bitten he will be by your side and do everything in his power to make your last moments comfortable. Unable to end your pain while you’re still alive and yourself, he will wait for you to turn before he can eventually kill you.

Rika

Leader of this other group and still goes by the name savior.

Her group has a questionable pyramid scheme: They are basically a apocalyptic cult who believes that this end of the world is a sign for them to build their new society.

Somehow mastered to build the most powerful survival group in a safe locations with strong walls.

Is interested to bring in people of your group if they are useful to her.

Especially interested in Seven, since he got the brains she could need to further build up her own little society behind her walls.

And will sacrifice everything for her cause, especially the lives of people working for her.

Uses force to make people stay and work for her. Will kill her own “believers” and turn them into zombies if they astray from the beliefs she forced onto them, then have them in cages within their walls to show them off to the other members her community as an example of what happens when you go against the grain.

Especially uses Saeran as her most active tool in whatever mission she plans.

Weapon of choice: Her charm and manipulation tactics.

Legit thinks life after the outbreak is better than before and the apocalypse is somehow a gateway to paradise.

If you get bitten she locks you up to see the process of a human turning as a sort of experiment.

#mysme #mystic messenger #jumin han #saeyoung choi #saeran choi #jaehee kang #v #yoosung kim #i just found this in my drafts #i wrote this like a year ago and never posted it uhm #this is heavily inspired by twd #idk is this on bad taste to post about apocalypses now wth everything... e-e #headcanon #i kinda wanna get back into just writing stupid headcanons again #hc

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tyongxnct · 4 years

Text

𝑙𝑜𝑣𝑒𝑠𝑖𝑐𝑘 - 𝐽𝑢𝑛𝑔 𝐽𝑎𝑒𝘩𝑦𝑢𝑛

summary: It was all about sex, but what happens when feelings grow and lust becomes love? What happens when you fall in love with your fuckbuddy?

genre: angst, smut, a little bit fluff // fwb!au, college!au

warnings: smut, a glass cut on (Y/n) foot, possible errors because I first wrote this stoy with Yeri (red velvet) as (Y/n) I tried to edit the story as much as possible

word count: 12k

A/N

It is finally happening. I finished my first story ever and posted it. Thank you for taking your time and reading this story I've came up with. I must admit, I'm a little scared, it's my first time publishing my own work. This is my first story and I'm so thankful for my friends, who helped me and supported me through this whole process of creating "Lovesick".

Thank you Jung Jaehyun for exisiting.

One last thing; I am probably going to write Taeyong and Seulgi's story as a spin-off, so If you are intersted, you can follow me and I'll keep you updated. :)

thanx

“We’re just friends. Friends who fuck. I don’t see the problem here? We both agreed on this, it’s just sex. No feelings, no emotions & nothing more than sex.”, he said.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea. Why her? You could fuck anybody. Why does it have to be a friend? How did you two even start this whole thing?”, Johnny and Jaehyun were leaning agains Jaehyun’s car as you walked over to them. But you stopped and listened to them. You had to know what Jaehyun felt about it.

Jaehyun remembers the first time you slept together very well. It was awkward but a good awkward. It just felt right and both of you needed it at that moment, so why not?

“It’s different, I can’t explain it.”

“So you like her?”, Johnny asked.

“Of course not! As a friend? Yeah. And that’s it. Nothing more.”, he sounded disgusted. Was he disgusted?

3 months ago

“I know I suck sometimes, but I never thought I am that horrible as a girlfriend.”, Yuta had just broken up with you and there you are, drinking your problems away. “Are you out of your mind? Just because that asshole told you some stupid stuff, he’s right? You are great, the best.”, Wendy was ready to fight Yuta.

Yuta and you met in your first year of high school and you’ve been together nearly a year, until he decided to break up because you ‘sucked’ as a girlfriend or maybe because he liked other girls sucking his dick more. Yeah, that happened before. You had caught Yuta and a random girl at a party and because he told you that he was too drunk to think and that he was sorry, you forgave him. You liked him too much to let go, which has been a problem since you were little. Letting go was too painful.

The second time you caught him, was with your roommate. Both sober as hell, but after he told you, that it was your roommate who jumped on him, you forgave him. Again. And now, after he cheated on her two times (maybe even more times, you didn’t know), he was the one who breaks up with you?

“Baby, I know you like him but you are worth so much more, right Jaehyun?!”, Wendy kicked Jaehyun’s leg under the table. Jaehyun who was sitting with his two friends couldn’t focus at the girls at that moment. He was thinking about his own broken heart. He didn’t talk about what had happened to him, you needed him, he tried to focus on you now, trying to forget his broken heart.

“Of course. You are too good for that fucking asshole. I’ve been telling you this since the day you introduced him as your boyfriend. I knew that he’s a bastard. And my offer to cut off his dick is still available, just saying.”, he finished his drink and saw their other friends coming in. “Let’s have fun tonight and forget about that stupid ass.”

“What about Dahyun? Isn’t she coming tonight?”, Wendy asked Jaehyun about his little crush, but little did she know that his little crush started dating someone. “No, she told me that she’ll be home for the weekend.”, and technically that wasn’t a complete lie. She was gone for the weekend, but not home.

Johnny, Joy, Mark and Doyoung came to your table and the mood got a little better. You stopped thinking of your broken heart and so did Jaehyun.

Later that night, they said their goodbyes and Jaehyun took you home. He always did. Not only because your apartment (in which you lived alone after that incident with your so called roommate) was not even 5 minutes away, it was because he wanted to keep his friend safe. He couldn’t sleep since you’ve known each other for so long, he needed to make sure your were home and safe.

You were infront of the building and you didn’t want to leave him. Youb felt alone and so did he. “Jae something’s wrong right?”, you turned to him. “What do you mean?”, he knew that you noticed that he was behaving different tonight.

“Do you want to come in and drink some cocoa with me?”, you knew that he would never say no to cocoa.

You were sitting on your balcony, with a glass of warm cocoa in your hands and a blanket around them. It’s not the first time that you were this close, but you were just friends, even though others didn’t believe that, but it was true. Just friends.

“Tell me what happened.”, you said after taking a sip. “It’s nothing- just- okay. Dahyun’s dating someone.”, saying this out loud hurt a little more and felt more real.

“Oh. I didn’t know, I’m sorry. I know you liked her.”

“It’s okay, I guess, maybe it’s my fault. I should have told her how I feel. But it doesn’t matter anymore.”, he looked up to the beautiful stars.

“No! It’s not your fault. She must’ve been blind. You are fucking great. There are so many girls who would do anything to be with you. You should wait a little, maybe it’s nothing serious. I don’t think that she’d start dating someone after spending so much time with you.”, you tried to cheer your friend up, nearly forgetting about your own heart.

You put your head on his shoulder and closed your eyes. “Maybe love isn’t something for us.”

“Maybe you are right.”, he closed his eyes too, and pulled you a little closer. Suddenly you felt warmer under the blanket, both of you thinking it was the cocoa, although it was your heart. You fell asleep in that position and you felt safer than ever before.

It’s been two weeks since Yuta broke up with you and you didn’t know how to feel. Of course you were hurt, but now you and Jaehyun were the only singles in your friends group which is why you’ve been spending more time together than before. He made you forget about him and you made him forget about her.

“I bought some wine and chinese takeout.”, he put the bags on the kitchen counter. “Perfect.”, you took out two wine glasses and chopsticks. The couch was ready for you and the movie, too.

“What are we watching tonight?”, he asked you, sitting down on the couch next to you. “Since tonight I’m choosing, we’re gonna watch 'My best friends wedding’ !”, you loved romantic comedies and he knew that you loved it so he watched it with you.

“He fucking loves her, like, he should just marry Julia Roberts. Man, what an idiot.”, while Jaehyun was angry at he ending of the movie, you were crying your eyes out. “Everytime I watch this movie I feel my heart breaking.”

You snuggled up to Jaehyun and he smiled at you. “You look ugly when you cry.”

“Ass.”, you got up, a little to fast, and fell back on his lap, Jaehyun pushes you away, because he felt you on his, well, on his dick. “How much wine- three bottles?! When did we drink so much?”, you got back up, not noticing that you just sat on his dick and cleaned the table. “You drank non stop, you didn’t even share with me.”, he helped you, taking the glasses with him to the kitchen, trying to ignore that you just sat on his dick.

Both of you tipsy, maybe even a little drunk, fell back on the couch, you put her head on his thigh and Jaehyun thought you were about to do something else “God- what are you doing?”, he pushed you, a little to hard, and you fell on the floor. “What the fuck Jaehyun? I was just laying down?”

You didn’t get up from the floor, sitting kind of between his legs, looking up at him. You were too tipsy to get back up. He had a perfect view, if he was honest.

“I thought- well, you.. shut up.”, he looked away, a girl was between his legs, looking up to him like you were about to suck his dick. It was already past midnight and you were a little sleepy, you yawned and that was too much for him. You looked ready, as if you were doing this on purpose.

“Stop it.”, he was hard. “What?- J-Jaehyun are you.. uhm.. are you hard?”, you looked at the bulge in front of your eyes and then back at him. “N-No?”, his ears got a little red and he took a pillow to hide his hard dick. “Why would you- oh..”, you got up and sat down, next to him. “Sorry I didn’t want to.. uhm.. you know.”

“N-No it’s alright.. I know that I’m hot.”, you teased him. His head turned to you. “Come on, yo did that on purpose didn’t you?”

“Are you crazy? No? I’m drunk?”, your eyes going slowly down to his hand on the pillow. You tried to focus on him but you must admit, it made you horny. Thinking that Jaehyun was horny next to you, because of you, made you horny.

“When was the last time you did it with a girl?”, you asked.

“It’s been.. a while.”

You looked at each other.

“Does it.. uhm hurt? I mean it looks unconfortable in those jeans.”

“A little.. I guess..”

Awkward silence.

“When was your last time?”, he asked you he slowly put the pillow away.

“A.. a couple months ago..”, it was with Yuta a couple months ago, before he cheated on you the first time.

“Do you.. I mean. uhm, do you want to do something about it?”, you looked down and then back up. “Do you?”, he asked you back.

“W-what?”, you heared him but you thought it was your imagination. “I asked.. if you want to do something about it.”, maybe it was the wine, maybe the pain.

But right then and there it didn’t matter, nothing mattered.

You nodded slowly and he pulled you on his lap, hands on your butt, both still looking deep into your eyes. You felt him pull you down to his crotch, to feel how hard you made him. “It’s just sex.”, he said. “Just sex.”, you agreed and then your lips met. First it was slow and careful. Your hands on his strong chest, slowly going down. His hand on your thigh, holding you tight and then his hand got under your shirt, his hand meeting your breast. You gasped with his touch and he used the opportunity to put his tongue into your mouth.

With your hands you opened his belt and unzipped his jeans. Jaehyun pulled your shirt over your head, looking at your beautiful breasts. You felt shy, it was the first time, he saw so much of your skin. He looked back into your eyes and then he leaned in to suck on your breast, your nipples getting harder and more senitive, you let out a moan and your head fell back.

His other hand playing with your other nipple. He kissed you up and stopped on your neck, kissing and sucking your skin. You hands in his hair, pulling it softly.

“I want you to fuck me, Jaehyun.”, you said, while you slowly moved your hips. He was harder than before. “Okay, I’ll fuck you.”, his hands back on your ass, he got up and made his way to your bedroom. He put you on the bed, looked down with his eyes full of lust and undressed himself. He was standing infront of you, completly naked looking like a greek god.

You also removed your clothes and looked at him. It was just sex. Sex between two horny friends.

“I’m gonna fuck you so hard, (Y/n). You won’t forget who made you feel so good.”, he was at the edge of the bed and kissed his way up to your pussy. He looked at your pussy and then back to you, not breaking the eyecontact as he slowly kissed every inch of your pussy. He sucked you so good, you thought you’d faint and as he put two fingers at once in you, you were moaning louder than ever before. “Fuck Jaehyun-”

He was fast and deep, hitting your g-point with every push. “Jaehyun- I’m gonna come, god!”, and the he stopped. “What the fuck?”, you were about to hit your climax. “I want you to come when I’m inside of you.”, he said with his husky voice.

“Do you want me to suck you off- holy shit!”, he didn’t need to get sucked off. He was hard enough to fuck you like that. “Fuck.”, he hissed as he sucked on your skin.

“Oh my god, Jaehyun! Fuck!”, he was fast and deep, hitting your right spot. “So fucking tight.”, it was too much for both of you, you were clenching around his dick and he was so big. It didn’t take long for both of you to come.

“I’m- fuck- I’m coming, oh god.”

“Me too, fuck. Fuck.”, and you came together. Both of you breathed heavily and were sweating. “Fuck I came in you.”, Jaehyun said as he rolled over.

“I-It’s okay, I’m on the pill, fuck.”

He went to the bathroom and got a towel, to clean you up. “Thank you.”

Jaehyun und you were too exhausted to talk about what just happened so you fell asleep next to each other.

Next day

He was the first to wake up. Jaehyun rubbed his eyes and looked down on him. He was naked, but why? Like a flash everything that happened last night was infront of his eyes. How he fucked his friend, and how good it felt. He looked to the left, you were still asleep and naked. Jaehyun tried to look away but you looked beautiful.

He couldn’t leave. If he left, you would think he regretted it or something- but he didn’t. He dressed up and decided to make breakfast.

Half an hour later you woke up. Your face red and your right side cold. Did he leave? Was your friendship over now? When Jaehyun suddenly opened the door, you looked silently at each other, until you noticed that you were still naked.

“Uhm.. I made breakfast.”, he kind of looked away and you took the blanket to cover yourself. It was so awakward. “'Okay. J-Just give me a second.”, you waited for him to leave but he didn’t get it.

You looked at each other for a couple seconds until he got it. “Oh, yeah, sorry.”,

“What the fuck, Jaehyun.”, he said to himself as he sat down at the dining table. You dressed up and went to the kitchen, you couldn’t walk properly. “Hi.”, you said as you sat down. “Hey.”

None of you talked. Youjust ate and looked down on your plate. After a couple minutes it was too much. “So we had sex.”, he said and looked at you.

You didn’t think he’d be so straight forward about it. “Uh, yeah.”

Awkward silence again.

“I can’t feel my legs.”, you said it to break the ice. He laughed at that “Sorry. Uhm.. You know it was just sex right? It’s not such a big deal. There are so many people who are friends and have sex, right?”, he asked as if he needed confirmation.

“Yeah of course. It’s like hanging out and watching a movie.”, did you just say sex is like watching a movie?

“You are absolutley right.”

Now it was just silence.

“W-would you do it again?”, you asked him, looking directly into his eyes. “Y-Yeah? I mean, we are friends, and sex is great? Why wouldn’t we do it again, right? No stupid feelings to confuse us. Just having a good time with a friend.”, it sounded so right, but was it?

“So we are like, friends with benefits now?”, you kind of liked the idea.

“If you want to.”

“Yeah, let’s do it.”

“Now??”, he was about to have a bite of his toast. “No, idiot, I mean let’s do the friends with benefits thing.”

“Oh, right. Give me your hand.”

You looked at him confused but still gave him your hand. He took your hand and looked into your eyes. “Sex, with no complicated feelings or stupid emotions, just sex. Two friends helping out each other.”

You nodded. “Just sex.”

And then you shook hands.

And that’s how the most complicated relationship started.

One month later

It’s been one month and nobody knew about the little thing between you and Jaehyun. When you hung out with your friends you were like how you were before the friends with benefits thing. Of course, you spent time together like before, watching movies and eating takeout food, but having sex whenever you felt like it. Sometimes you’d lie to your friends when you went to a party and would secretly fuck in the bathroom, or in his car, or sometimes in Johnny’s room when he was throwing another houseparty.

Just like right now.

“Fuck, (Y/n).”, you were on your knees sucking Jaehyun’s dick. The music at the party was too loud too hear his moans upstairs and the people too drunk to think of their two friends who were missing.

“You take my dick so well. I’m gonna fucking come inside of your pretty mouth.”, and so he did. You sucked him clean and were breathing heavily.

He softly pulled you up and kissed you. “I want to fuck you.”, he said as he placed kisses on your neck. “I want you to fuck me too-”, they were interrupted as someone tried to open the door. Luckily it was locked. “What the fuck?!”, Johnny yelled as he knocked on the door.

“Fuck.”, Jaehyun hissed and held your hand, he was so nervous and scared, he thought you’d get caught. “Jaehyun? What are you doing in my room?”, Johnny heared Jaehyun swearing. “John.. uhm I’m kinda busy in here.”

“Are you fucking jerking off in my bedroom?!”, Johnny yelled louder.

“No, you idiot.. I’m here with a girl.”, he yelled back. You looked down to your hands. “If you fucking make a mess on my bed I’m killing you.”, Johnny yelled before Joy could pull him to another room, well, to have sex, too.

Jaehyun didn’t notice how close he pulled you and how he held your hand. But as soon as he heared Johnny leaving he let go. “Woah that was fucking close.”

“Maybe we should leave.”, you said.

“Let’s stay a little longer, I don’t want them to notice anything. But fuck- let me make you come with my fingers now, and later I’ll fuck you so good. Is that alright for you?”, he was so gentle, even though he talked about fucking you, he always made sure you were okay with everything.

You smiled at him. “It’s alright, I can wait until we are home.” Even though it was unnecessary at that moment, he kissed you on the lips and opened the door. “Okay, baby, you can go out first, I’ll follow you a couple minutes later.”

You nodded and slowly looked outside, there was nobody and with that you ran out of the room.

Something felt strange. When he hold your hand and kissed you, you never kissed except while having sex. Weird.

Johnny’s house was big, he was a little rich, he’d say, the best college parties were at his house. You got yourself a drink and went to Mark and Doyoung. “Thought you went home.”, Mark said to you as you sat down next to him. “I was just getting some fresh air.”

A couple minutes later Jaehyun came back, he sat down, next to them and Mark and Doyoung wiggled their eyebrows at him. “Johnny texted us that you got some pussy.”, you chocked on her drink. They all looked at you “Sorry, too much vodka.”

“Johnny needs to shut the fuck up.”, Jaehyun said.

“Soo, who’s the lucky girl?”, they asked him, it was so awkward.

“None of your business.”, he took Doyoungs drink and finished it.

“She was that bad? Sorry man.”

“No she’s perfect.”, Jaehyun suddenly said. “I mean, it was great, now shut the fuck up or I’ll kick your asses.” Jaehyun looked away from the three. You were taken aback. He thought that you were perfect? How? Why? You?

As you looked away you noticed a familiar face coming to your direction.“Hey guys. Hey Jaehyun.”, Jaehyun looked to the owner of that voice. It’s been a while since he saw or talked to Dahyun.

“Yo Dahyun! Come sit with us.”, Mark invited her. “Sure, thanks.”, she was sitting next to Jaehyun and the two were sitting infront of you. It felt weird to look at them together. You didn’t like it.

Too caught up in your thoughts, you looked down on your legs, trying to ignore the hand on Jaehyun’s thigh which didn’t belong to you. It belonged to Dahyun, his crush. Did he like it? Did he want to have sex with her?

“Dahyun, babe. Let’s go.”, there he was, Dahyun’s boyfriend. Why would a girl with a boyfriend touch another man like that? You were angry.

“Sure baby. It was nice seeing you guys.”, she waved at you before she left with her boyfriend. Jaehyun didn’t know what to feel. Was he jealous? Did he even care? He didn’t know and he actually didn’t care.

“Do you want to go home, too?”, he softly asked you. “Yes, please.”

After saying goodbye to your friends, you left the party. None of you talked on your way home.

Back in your apartment, you took off your heels and went to your bedroom. You weren’t sure if you were going to have sex. Maybe he didn’t want to have sex with you. Maybe he wanted to have sex with Dahyun.

He closed her door and followed you to your bedroom. You were standing infront of your full body mirror and turned around to see the zipper on her back. Jaehyun saw you struggling with it and walked to you and turned you around. You looked at him through the mirror, how he slowly pulled the zipper down. He was looking at you now, right into your eyes. You could feel his breath on your skin and it gave you goosebumps.

He pushed one strap of your dress down and pressed little kisses on your skin, not breaking the eye contact. Then he pushed the other strap down and your dress fell down on the floor, exposing your body. You weren’t wearing a bra, just black lace panties. He looked up and down and his other hand found his way to your heat. Slowly playing with your clit and still kissing and sucking on her skin.

He pushed two fingers inside, faster and deeper than ever. You watched him fingering you and so did he. You could feel his hard member poking your ass and it became harder to stand as he fucked you so good with only two fingers. You closed her eyes and moaned. “Fuck.”

Jaehyun stopped fucking you with his fingers. “Open your eyes and watch me fucking you so well with my fingers, or I won’t make you come.”

You opened your eyes and looked at him. He was rough, you liked it.

He started fucking you harder with his fingers, It was hard to stand but he held you. He’d hold you and never let go.

“Fuck Jaehyun. I’m coming, oh god.”, with that you came on his fingers. He pulled his fingers out of your pussy and sucked on them, his eyes never leaving yours.

“I’m going to fuck you with my dick now, Can you stand a little longer for me, baby? Mhm? I’m gonna make you feel so fucking good, but you have to stand for me, is that okay for you?”, he was back to being gentle. “Yes. Please just fuck me.”

He took of his clothes and his dick was so fucking hard. Without a warning he pushed his complete length into you. “Oh fuck!”, his hands were holding you tight, he would leave bruises that was sure. Jaehyun fucked you from behind and you two looked at each other through the mirror.

“Fuck.”, he pushed in and out hitting your soft spot so hard. “Tell me, baby, who makes you feel so good?”

“You-! You Jaehyun. Fuck you are so big and deep inside of me, fuck.”

“Just like that baby, You take my dick so well in your tight pussy, (Y/n). Your pussy feels so good.”

One of his hands cupped your breast and played with it while the other still held you tight. “Fuck I’m gonna come.”

“Me too baby, come with me.” and with one last look at each other, you both came like never before. He filled you up with so much cum, as he pulled his dick out of you, it drippet down your legs.

“J-Jaehyun, I can’t feel my legs.”, you fell into his arms. “I’m sorry, baby. Was I too rough? Did I hurt you?”, He laid you on the bed and looked at you with concern in his eyes.

“N-No I liked it.. it’s just.. You were never this rough before.. Was it because.. Uhm.. Because of her?”, you asked him while he cleaned you up with a towel.

“I.. I don’t know. Maybe. I’m sorry that I let it out on you.”, he took the blanket and covered your naked bodies. “Do you still like her?”

He was silent for a moment. He thought about it. Did he still like her? He didn’t know to be honest.

“I don’t know. Let’s not talk about it now.”

You nodded and snuggled up to him, it was just sex but both of you liked to cuddle, just sex with a little cuddling.

Two months later

Everyone thought you were dating, even though nobody knew of your friends with benefits part. It was because of your relationship in general. You were touchy, not too touchy, even though you tried to leave space when you were with your friends. But you did everything together. You laughed together, cried together, even your little fights were cute. Joy knew that there was more than just being friends. friends didn’t act like that.

“So.. You and Jaehyun?”, one day Joy said, when you went shopping together.

“W-what do you mean?”, you hoped that they didn’t notice anything.

“So you guys are a couple right?”

“Uhm no? Why would you think that?”, you were driving to your aparment.

“The way yo two talk to each other or look at each other or just act towards each other in general. It’s so obvious that you guys like each other.”, Joy said casually.

“What are you talking about? You got it wrong, we don’t like like each other, we’re just friends with- I mean just friends. fuck..”, you were about to get out of the car, but Joy was faster and closed the doors.

“Stop right there.”, she said. “What the fuck were you about to say?!”

“Nothing?”

“I swear to god, If you don’t tell me what you were about to say. I’ll never talk to you again.”

“Fine! Bitch. We are something like friends with benefits. Are you happy now?”

“What the fuck are you saying?! You guys have sex?! Johnny said that it was possible but I thought it was just like dating, holy fuck. How is he?”, she wiggled her eyebrows.

“Oh fuck off! We promised not to tell anyone. Don’t you fucking tell Johnny!”

“I won’t tell him if you tell me how Jaehyun is in bed.”

“Fuck, fine! He’s like a fucking greek god. Sometimes he’s so fucking soft but the good soft and sweet and other times he fucks me I sometimes think I’m going to faint.”

“You mean like vanilla sex?”

“No like.. he says sweet things to me and is so gentle, kisses me everywhere, he makes sure i feel safe and good, like that kind of soft.”

“Baby, do you really think that sex is without emotions and feelings? Because it’s not. Sex is an emotion itself, I’d say. The soft sex you just described is to feel each other. He wants to make you to feel good because he cares. And you honey, you just talked about having sex with him like marrying him.”

Youu looked down, was Joy right? She couldn’t be. She shouldn’t be. You had a deal. It said just sex, but sex was an emotion. You felt feelings when you were with him, no matter while having sex or cooking.

“Oh hell no. Joy, I can’t let this happen. We made a deal, just sex!”, you were about to go mad.

“Baby, don’t worry, It’s not just You, I can feel it in my bones that Jaehyun’s feeling the same way. You’ll see tonight at the party. I’ll prove it to you. Now get out and get fucking dressed. You have to look hotter than ever before. Trust me.”

“Okay, I will.”

And you did, you wore a short silk red velvet dress. You never wore something like that before. It was Johnny’s birthday party so you were going alone because Jaehyun needed to help Johnny to get the house ready. It was a little after 8 when you arrived.

You got out of your car, pulling your dress a little down, then a little up to cover yourself a little better, but it was hard, the dress was too short. You got inside of the house and looked out for Joy. Your eyes met and Joy’s mouth fell open.

“Holy fuck. I said hot but this is beyond hot. God there’ll be so many dicks offered for you tonight.”, Joy winked at her. “Yo Joy- Holy shit, (Y/n), what in the world. Yo Doyoung look at her!”, Mark’s eyes were wide and now Doyoung’s too.

“Uhm, guys, it’s not my first time wearing a dress.”, you said, a little awkward.

“Yeah but, wow.”, Mark said eyes still wide. “Stop staring you pervert.”, Doyoung pulled mark with him. “Joy what’s taking you so long-”, Jaehyun came out of the kitchen, looking for Joy, but his eyes met yours. You in such a dress. Could you call that a dress? Your legs were nearly completely open and your neck, he scanned your body and saw that you tried to hide the hickeys he gave you. That was a mistake, he thought.

“Hi, Jaehyun.”, you said casually, well you tried to be.

“Uhm, hey. Joy, uh, Johnny’s looking for me. I mean for you, not me. You, his girlfriend.”, he couldn’t take his eyes off you, he saw you naked so many times, but everytime it felt like the first time.

“Thanks Jaehyun, I’ll see you guys later, and oh, (Y/n), there’s someone I’d like to introduce you to later.”

“What do you mean?”, Jaehyun asked before you could. “Oh just an old friend, who’s single, just like our (Y/n). I think it’s time for her to date again, don’t you think so Jaehyun?”, she tested him, but you were also curious of how he’d react.

“I don’t know. If she feels like it, why would I have to say something on that?”, he was awkward, and obvious, Joy could see through him.

“Yeah, right. I’ll see you guys later.”

Joy left you two standing there. You looked him and he looked at the floor. “Uhm, do you want to drink something?”, he asked you, still looking away.

“Sure.”, you tried to act calm, but you weren’t. Not only you looked amazing, he looked great, too. But for you, Jaehyun even looked great with just a hoodie. While you were still on your first drink, Jaehyun was already on his third. He tried to ignore the stares on your legs, or anywhere on your body. It made him angry, for whatever reason. He didn’t know why. But the worst is yet to come.

It was 11 when Joy pulled you away from her friends to introduce you to someone. Someone who wasn’t Jaehyun.

“So this is my friend I told you about, (Y/n), and this is an old friend of Johnny, Taeyong.”, Joy introduced you two. “Nice to meet you, you are prettier than Joy told me.”, he shook your hand slightly smiling at you.

“Nice to meet you, too. And thank you. Joy didn’t tell me anything about you, I’m sorry, right Joy?”, you glared at her. “Well now you guys can get to know each other, I’ll leave you alone, bye.”

Joy went back to your friends and saw Jaehyun staring at you and Taeyong. He was boiling, he didn’t know why, but he could punch a wall. Or Taeyong. Preferably Taeyong.

“They look good together, don’t you guys think so? He’s a really great guy, I think they could be a cute couple.”, Joy’s eyes wandered to Jaehyun who just finished his fourth drink, well he couldn’t remember, he lost count. “I think he looks like a fucking piece of shit.”, talking to himself, but Joy heard him.

Jaehyun looked back to you, you looked ethernal, but you smiled too often. Everytime Taeyong’s mouth moved you laughed. Why would you laugh? What was so funny?

“I think something is wrong with me.”, he said to Joy. “Yeah, it’s called jealousy.”, she said not so loud but he still heard it. He ignored her and got up to get another drink. He couldn’t stand looking at you having fun with someone else.

Thinking alcohol would stop that ache in his chest, he drank so much that night. As Taeyong put his hand on your knee, he had enough. He stood up, not caring if anybody was looking, went to you and took your wrist in his hand. “That’s enough for tonight. We are leaving.”

“Do you know that guy?”, Taeyong asked, hand still on your knee. You didn’t understand what was happening right now. “Uhm- I.. what?”

“Put your fucking hand away if you don’t want me to fucking break it.”, he pointed at Taeyong’s hand. “Who the fuck are you? Her boyfriend?”, Taeyong asked, while his hand got higher on your thigh. “Yes I fucking am you son of a bitch.”, Jaehyun let go of your and pushed Taeyong back.

“Jaehyun-”

Taeyong stood up and pushed him, too but Jaehyun was too drunk and If you didn’t hold him, he’d be on the floor. “If she’s your fucking girlfriend then act like her fucking boyfriend, you fucker. Sorry, (Y/n). I’ll see you around.”, Taeyong glanced at Joy and winked at her. Joy’s plan worked. She couldn’t hear anything because of the crowd and the music but the sign was enough.

“Let me take you home, okay?”, you looked up into Jaehyun’s eyes who was already looking at you.

He nodded and you brought him to her car, luckily you didn’t drink more than a little cup and were able to drive. None of you spoke, both of you confused as hell, Jaehyun kind of awake and asleep.

He called you his girlfriend. Did he mean it? You had so many thoughts and questions.

When they arrived you helped him out of the car and up to your apartment. You carried him to the couch and he fell on it. “I’ll make you some coffee.”

You left him in the living room and made him some coffee. You poured it into the cup but two hands stopped you. “I don’t need coffee.”, he whispered in your ear.

You wanted to turn around but you were trapped between his arms and his chest. “J-Jaehyun.”

“You shouldn’t have worn this dress, (Y/n).”, he said and gripped your waist, holding you tight.

“You shouldn’t have covered up those hickeys I gave you, (Y/n). They look so pretty on you.”, he turned you around and you felt so small infront of him. He looked down on youand she couldn’t look up to meet his eyes. His finger slightly stroked your neckline, where he placed the hickeys.

“They would show everyone that you aren’t fucking available. That you are fucking mine, (Y/n).”, he put his finger under your chin and slowly pushed your face up. “Are you mine, (Y/n)?”, you looked at each other. It was like music to your ears, to hear that he was jealous and that you were his.

“Yes I am.”

“Who do you belong to?”, he wanted, no, he needed to hear it.

“I belong to you, Jaehyun. Only you.”

You needed him. So much. “Good girl.”, he leaned in and kissed you. Like it was the last time. Like he would never taste you again.

That night it wasn’t just sex. It was loving each other, and feeling each other.

He kissed you, slowly and with so much passion. You wrapped your legs around his hips and he carried you to your bedroom. Jaehyun’s lips never left yours. The only light source in your room was the moonlight, shining brightly on you. He slowly undressed you and kissed every inch of your exposed neck, leaving little love bites.

You closed her eyes and let Jaehyun take control of your body. You were already wet enough, he couldn’t wait to be inside of you. Jaehyun needed you and you needed him. He was hovering above you and looked you in the eyes. Jaehyun slowly got inside of you, his eyes never leaving yours.

With one hand on your cheek, he stroked you and started kissing you again. You moaned into the kiss and opened your legs further to feel him closer. No words were exchanged, only heavy breathing and moaning could be heared.

The next morning when you woke up, you were alone. Jaehyun wasn’t in the bathroom nor in the kitchen, for the first time, he left. You were scared, a little, scared that he didn’t mean any of this. You loved him. You were so in love with him.

You wanted to give him a little time, you thought talking about last night with Joy would calm you a little down. Little did you know you weren’t the only one who thought it would be helpful to talk to someone.

“We’re just friends. Friends who fuck. I don’t see the problem here? We both agreed on this, it’s just sex. No feelings, no emotions & nothing more than sex.”, he said.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea. Why her? You could fuck anybody. Why does it have to be a friend? How did you two even start this whole thing?”, Johnny and Jaehyun were leaning agains jaehyuns car as she walked over to them. But she stopped and listened to them. She needed to know what Jaehyun felt about it.

Jaehyun remembered the first time they slept together very well. It was awkward but a good awkward. It just felt right and both of them needed it at that moment, so why not?

“It’s different, I can’t explain it.”

“So you like her?”, Johnny asked.

“Of course not! As a friend? Yeah. And that’s it. Nothing more.”, he sounded disgusted. Was he disgusted?

“I don’t think that you are telling the truth. Did you see yourself last night? You were about to rip off Taeyong’s head, even though Joy planned the whole jealousy thing.”, Jaehyun remembered lats night pretty well. How he talked to you and what he said to you.

“You know, just because Yuta fucked her up I’m not the one who’s going to play her knight in a shining armor. I liked the sex, yeah. It helped me to forget about Dahyun she propably did the same with me because of him.”

“You used me to forget about her?”, Johnny and Jaehyun turned their heads and saw you looking at them. Hurt war written all over your face and tears were running down your cheeks. “I’ll leave you two alone.”, Johnny left you two, hoping that they would talk through everything.

“I uhm I didn’t know that you were listening..”, Jaehyun said. “What? If you knew would you call me your girlfriend again? Would you call me yours again?!”, you yelled at him.

“Stop yelling around. You are overreacting.”, Jaehyun tried to calm you down but he did the opposite. “Overreacting?! You fucking used me!”

“First of all, the things I said last night.. I only said that because I was drunk and horny. And second don’t act like you didnt use me too!”, you couldn’t believe your ears.

“I never used you like that. You were my friend. I wanted to be with you because I felt safe and loved! I didn’t even think once about Yuta, not even the first night! Y-You are so disgusting I can’t believe I fell in love with you!”, you yelled under tears.

“You- what? We made a fucking deal.”

“Go fuck you and fuck your damn deal!”, you pushed him away, even though you felt so weak. “I don’t want to see you ever again- you.. you- I can’t believe you. You destroyed this friendship or what the fuck this was all about. Just because that fucking bitch didn’t love you you didn’t have the right to use me!”

“Don’t call her that!”

“You are defending her now?! How can you be so blind?!”, Jaehyun glared at you, he was fucking furious.

“I am the blind one?! Your fucking boyfriend fucking cheated on you hundred times but you still went back to him! If I didn’t fuck you, you would go back to him, because your are so easy to fuck-”, you slapped him with the little power you had.

“Yeah I went back to him, not only once. But to you, I would never come back to you. I’d rather die.”, his hand was on his cheek, you just slapped him, he knew he desereved it, he really did.

You turned around and left him standing there, his hand on his cheek, all alone.

On your way home, you hoped that a car would run you over, to stop the pain. You always thoght that Yuta broke your heart, but this time, it really broke. It was the worst pain you have ever felt, your vision blurry, hands trembling, you opened the door to your home and fell on your knees and cried your heart out.

Jaehyun was scared. Scared to admit that he actually loved you, too. It didn’t make any sense to him. You were friends, nothing more nothing less. Well, that was once. Now he had lost not only his best friend but also the girl he actually loved. He was a real asshole, Jaehyun said things he shouldn’t have but it was too late now..

You didn’t show up to class. You didn’t even go to classes you didn’t share. You also kind of ignored your other friends, sometimes Joy called you but you weren’t in the mood. It’s been a week since your fight with Jaehyun and the only thing your’ve done so far was getting out of bed to go to the bathroom. You hated your apartment, everything reminded you of him.

Jaehyun noticed your absence. You never skipped classes, what if something had happened to you? No, Johnny would have told him.

“Hey Jaehyun, uhm, are you free tonight?”, it was Dahyun. He was sitting in class, minding his own business as she approached him. “Yeah, sure.”, why did she ask him if he was free? “Cool, I thought that we could go out and I don’t know, have dinner together?”, she smiled at him.

“You mean, uhm, like a date?”, he asked her and she nodded, her face slightly red. “But, what about-” “It’s over, well, it wasn’t a serious relationship in the first place, but whatever we can talk tonight about that, if you want to.”

“I’d love that.”

Jaehyun has a date tonight, he felt excited.. right?

A week later they were officially dating.

Nobody told you, too scared to hurt you more. Joy visited you sometimes and tried to get you out of the bed, but it was hard. “Come on, let’s go eat something. You have nothing here, aren’t you starving?”, Joy looked through your kitchen.

“I’m not feeling well. We can go to the supermarket If you want to make food, my last offer.”, and that was enough for Joy, she’d finally got you out of your apartment.

With sweatpants and a hoodie (which belonged to Jaehyun but you didn’t care) you went to the nearest supermarket. “I’ll look for some fruits for you, alright? Be right back.”, Joy thought that you needed some vitamins. And you really did. “Yeah, sure why not.”

While going through the supermarket with the shopping cart, you looked on the floor, not noticing that you hit something, well a someone, someone too familiar. “Oh sorry-”, you looked up and saw Jaehyun after so much time, it felt like forever. He stopped his movements and looked back at you. You looked, well, your eyes were red and you looked much thinner. But there were no emotions on your face. Of course he was here, the supermarket was in the middle of your homes and destiny hated you.

“Baby did you find the- oh hey (Y/n). It’s been so long.”, Dahyun came from behind, held Jaehyun’s hand and leaned against him. “H-Hi, yeah.”, your eyes wandered to their hands, Dahyun was holding tight, marking her territory.

“Are you alright? You look so, uhm, I don’t want to be rude, but you know what I mean, right? Were you sick? You weren’t in class either.”, did she just call you ugly? “Yeah, uhm, I was- am, still, sick.-”

“I got you some apples and strawberries and also- oh, uh, hi?”, Joy came with her hands full.

“You know you can come and have dinner with us two, right baby?”, Dahyun was fucking doing it on purpose.

“What? I don’t think that-”, he started but you interrupted him. “You know, we are really sorry but we are going on a doubledate tonight, sorry, right Joy?”, you said through your gritted teeth. “Yeah, right.”

A doubledate? You and who? Who would you go on a date with? Is it yuta again? Jaehyun asked himself- but why did he care?

“We’ll see you guys around, then. Have fun.”, you were about to throw punches at her. Fake bitch, you thought. Without saying anything back you walked away, not looking at Jaehyun, completely ignoring him.

“I’ll never go out, I fucking knew that it was a bad idea to leave my bed.”, as soon as you entered your home, you left the bags on the floor and went back to your room to get into your bed. “Why in the world were they shopping together? He got back to her so fast? Fucking asshole.”

“Uhm, about that.. They are dating.”, Joy told you as she layed beside her friend. “We thought it would be better not to tell you, I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright, just, I can’t believe he just broke my heart like that and is now dating her? Didn’t he like me even a tiny bit?”, you covered your face, trying to stop yourself from crying.

“Honey, I really don’t know, like, one time he looks like he’d fight against the world for you and then he tells you that bullshit. Johnny told me that he doesn’t talk about what happened between you guys at all.”

After a little while Joy spoke up again “You know, maybe we should really go on a doubledate tonight.”

“I look like shit, even that bitch Dahyun tolt me that. I don’t feel like going out..”

“Oh shut up, I’m calling Taeyong.”, Joy ignored her friend and called him. “Hey are you free tonight? Great, what do you think of a doubledate? With (Y/n)? Yeah, it’s her. No they are not.. Perfect, I’ll send you the adress. See you later.”, she hung up and grinned at her friend. “He sounded excited.”

“How much time do we have?”

“2 and a half hours.”, Yeri jumped out of her bed. “Fuck.”

While you were showering, Joy called her boyfriend, Johnny. Tonight was going to be amazing.

After the two of you got ready, Joy borrowed a dress from you, you waited for your dates to arrive. “This is going to be so awkward after what happened the last time I met him.”, you thought about going back to your bed.

“Oh shut up, he is great you are great, trust me, it’s gonna be great.”

And after five minutes their dates were waiting outside your apartment. You were nervous, really nervous but as soon as you saw Taeyong smiling at you, she relaxed.

“You two look amazing.”, Johnny and Taeyong said at the same time. “Thank you, you too.”, the girls said. Joy got into Johnny’s car. “We’ll see you guys at the restaurant.”, she winked at you.

You didn’t say anything, you were a little awkward next to him, he looked so good and you felt, well you felt ugly.

Taeyong opened your door, to help you get in and you thanked him as you got in. After he got inside of the car you started talking to him again. “I’m sorry that Joy called you so spontaneous, you probably had better things to do..”, you looked down to your hands on your lap.

“No, I’m happy that she called me. I wanted to see you again anyway.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I liked talking to you. I’d like to get to know you more.”, he smiled at you and looked back on the street again.

“Thanks.. me too.”, for the first time in weeks you smiled.

Johnny and Joy were the first to arrive, well not the first but, nobody thought that this was supposed to be tripledate. “What the fuck Johnny?”, Seulgi whispered to her boyfriend as she saw Jaehyun and Dahyun at the restaurant.

“I was talking to him when you called and I don’t know he insisted and then she heared about the doubledate and wanted to come, too. I’m sorry.”, Johnny tried to smile to his girlfriend as he explained himself.

“Hey Joy! Look it’s a tripledate, isn’t that lovely?”, Dahyun hugged her, Joy saw a long night coming.

“Yeah and I thought I was the only one who loved his music-”, (Y/n) who was talking to Taeyong stopped on her way to the table. Why in the world would he be here?

“It’s uhm, a tripledate! Isn’t that cool?”, Dahyun saw you and hugged you, too. What the actual fuck?

Taeyong took your hand, knowing the situation was complicated.

Johnny sat infront of Joy who was sitting next to you and next to you Taeyong. Jaehyun right infront of you and on his right was Dahyun. Awkward combination.

“You know, we can leave if you feel uncomfortable.”, Taeyong whispered into your ear, leaning a little to you, still holding your hand. Jaehyun tried to focus on his own date, his girlfriend, but he felt something he couldn’t explain as he saw you being so close to that guy.

“No, I’m fine thank you.”, you smiled at him.

After a little awkward silence, you ordered your food and the silence was back again.

Johnny couldn’t stand it. “So uhm, how did you two met?”, he asked Taeyong and you.

“Babe that was on your birthday, you were there.”, Joy told her boyfriend. ’“Right..”

Taeyong didn’t care about the others actually, he wanted to talk to you and that is what he did. He slightly turned to you and started asking you about your favourite music and movies.

“'Really? I love him, I think post malone is great. What do you think of The Weeknd?”, he asked you. “Sexy music, I love him.”, was all you said. “Taste.”, he said and was so excited to talk to you about your favourites.

Jaehyun was tense, Johnny, well everyone except Taeyong and you noticed. “Baby, do you want some salad?”, Dahyun, who was just eating a salad, asked Jaehyun. He hated salad. How could someone just eat salad? He looked over to your plate. You ordered pasta, he knew that you loved it.

“I don’t like salad.”, he said and focused on his steak.

You felt bad, Dahyun was eating a salad and here you were eating pasta, you felt ugly and now you felt fat. Suddenly feeling full, you asked Taeyong if he wanted to have some pasta.

“I’ll try one but you have to eat up okay? You look thinner than the last time we met.”, he said with a smile, he was concerned.

Did you really look thinner? You didn’t feel like it, even though you didn’t eat anything proper for a while now. You nodded with a smile and suddenly Jaehyun stood up.

“Excuse me. I’ll be right back.”, he went inside of the restaurant, to the restroom.

“What the fuck is wrong with you Jung Jaehyun?”, he asked himself as he looked to the mirror, suddenly remembering the night he had sex with you infront of the mirror.

You ignored him the whole dinner, as if he didn’t excist and that made him fucking angry. As he got back to the table, he noticed Taeyong’s arm around your backrest.

Too close.

“Welcome back baby, I ordered us some wine.”, Dahyun smiled at her boyfriend who didn’t look pleased. “I’d prefere something stronger.”, and then he ordered something stronger, something to help him ignore that feeling in his chest, whenever he heard you laughing or talking to Taeyong.

You were eating their dessert as Jaehyun was finishing his third drink. Dahyun pushed her cake to Jaehyun, she only took a little piece. “That’s enough for me tonight, can you finish it for me?”

“Why do you order it when you’re not going to eat it in the first place? Just eat that stupid cake.”, you would eat the cake all alone, he thought, but he looked over to you and saw you sharing the cake with Taeyong.

“I can’t eat so many carbohydrates at this hour, you know that, baby.”, she tried to act ladylike. God how he hated her when she did that. Who cares?! It’s just cake.

“Why would you fucking order it then?”, now he was a little louder. “Jaehyun, calm down. It’s just cake. Let me finish it, if you two don’t want it.”, Johnny tried to calm his friend.

Taeyong and you noticed the tension and decided it’s time to go. “Thank you for tonight, but it’s time for us to leave.”, Taeyong stood up and helped you, too.

“You guys are leaving already?”, Dahyun said. Jaehyun looked down to his drink. From the corner of his eyes he saw Taeyong holding your hand.

“Uh, yeah, we want to spent a little time alone.”, he didn’t say it to make Jaehyun angrier, but it did make him angry.

“Good night, and thank you Joy, I’ll see you.”, you said goodbye and went with Taeyong to his car. The whole night you tried to ignore Jaehyun, which was hard, because you could feel his feet under the table. You tried to focus on Taeyong and Joy and Johnny and most of the time it worked.

“I’m sorry, for that. I didn’t know he’d be here too.”, you told Taeyong. “It’s alright, I know it must be hard.”

“You made it easier.”, you genuinely smiled at him as he helped you into the car. “You want to go back home or can I have you for myself just a little longer. Don’t worry, no bad intentions.”

You laughed at his comment “I’d love to.”

And then he took you to the Han river.

“You know, that night Joy asked me to help you out with that guy, you, uhm, you actually helped me out, too.”, Taeyong sighed as he confessed.

“What do you mean?”, you were confused. “Well, there’s a girl..”, he blushed.

“Lee Taeyong did you use me to make a girl jealous? Now I don’t feel that guilty anymore.”, you smiled at him. You weren’t mad, why should you?

“Kind of. I don’t know. I don’t even like her- I hate her.”, he looked up to the sky, a little smile on his lips. “Or maybe I want to hate her.”

“Now I’m curious, who’s that girl?”

“Her name is Seulgi. I’ve known her for years now and the thing between us.. I don’t know.. We were cruel to each other in all those years. I said some ugly things, but she hurt me, too. I thought after high school, I’d never see her again but we applied to the same college. Even now we are fighting like there’s no tomorrow..”, Taeyong’s mind drifted to his time in high school.

“Are you sure that there’s no reason for your fights?”

He thought going through everything in his head once again. “Maybe it was becaus I rejected her 2 times.”

“You- what?!”

“Yeah she confessed to me in middle school and in high school but I rejected her everytime and I don’t even know why. Next thing I knew she started dating a friend of mine and I hated her for that, I didn’t want her to date him.”

“You are an idiot. You didn’t want to be with her and you didn’t want her to be with someon else. You broke her heart and she decided to move on. She probably didn’t even love that guy.”

“I don’t even know what to do. She stopped talking to me after Johnny’s birthday. I think I went to far..”, you facepalmed yourself.

“I’m sorry, but it is so obvious that you guys love each other. Don’t waste more time. You are a great guy and you should tell her what you feel and how much you actually love her.”, you smiled at him while staring at the sunset.

“You are right. Ugh, I wish I could beat my 15 years old self up- and my 18 years old self. I broke her hearts so many times, I want to be happy with her now. I want to make her smile and I want her to know that I love her, always have and always will.”

You applauded, “Congratulations, now go get that girl or I will throw you into the han river, idiot.”

“I will. I will get my girl but first I’ll take you home.”

After his car stopped infront of your apartment, Taeyong the gentleman he is, helped you out of the car. He accompanied you to your door and hugged you tightly.

“Thank you for opening my fucking eyes, lifesaver.”, he was the happiest.

“Thank you for saving me from that idiot today, too. Keep me updated!”

Little did you know, that there was a certain someone watching you hug and smile. After the hug, Taeyong jumped back into his car and drove away, to confess his love.

You smiled, you were happy for him. Happy that he found his love.

As you were about to open the door, you heard someone talking.

“(Y/n)..”, the smell of alcohol was so intense, you felt drunk all of a sudden.

You tried to get into your apartment but the grip on your wrist stopped you. You tried to get out of his grip but he was strong, too strong.

“Will you let me in, (Y/n)?”, he got a little closer.

“Did you miss me, (Y/n)?”, you could feel his chest against your back, his breath on your exposed neck. You closed your eyes, yes you missed him but that didn’t change anything. You missed the old Jaehyun, your friend, before anything happened between you.

With all the energy left in your body, you stepped on his foot and rushed inside but before you could close the door, his hand stopped you. He was much stronger than you and he probably didn’t even feel that you stepped on his foot.

You glared at him, trying not to cry or punch him. “Talk to me. Tell me to leave. Tell me to get out.”, as he got inside, you felt getting smaller and smaller next to him.

Jaehyun slammed the door shut and made you flinch. There was nothing you could do, except for ignoring him. You turned around, you removed your heels and went to the kitchen. You needed water.

Of course he followed you. As you poured water into you glass, he stood next to you and watched you. “You are behaving like a fucking kid. Do you think ignoring me is funny?”, you still ignored him, as you were about to take another sip, Jaehyun suddenly took the glass away from your hand and threw it on the floor, breaking it into many pieces.

“Fucking talk to me! Scream or yell I don’t fucking care! But don’t ignore me for fuck’s sake!”

He is drunk, he doesn’t know what he’s doing, you tried to calm yourself down. But Jaehyun was always like this, drunk or not, he liked destroying things, breaking them apart.

He took another glass that was on the counter and threw it on the floor. “You make me so fucking mad! SAY SOMETHING!”, it scared you when Jaehyun was angry but you wouldn’t give in. Not this time.

You backed away, accidentally stepping on a piece of the broken glass. “Fuck.”, you whispered to yourself, trying to move away from the other pieces. Blood dripping on the floor, Jaehyun’s eyes focused on your movements, not noticing that you were in pain.

You took a step, but the pain was too much. Before you could fall, Jaehyun held you by your waist as you winced in pain. Jaehyun saw the blood dropping, his heart clenched.

“Don’t look down. Close your eyes.”, he knew that you couldn’t look at blood.

You did what he said and fell into his arms, the smell of blood was too much for your.

Jaehyun carried you to the couch in the living room, softly putting you down. “I-I’ll be back, don’t open your eyes.” Jaehyun was in her bathroom, looking for stuff to clean your wound. Jaehyun tried to ignore the voice in his head that insulted him.

He came back with some cotton, disinfectant and bandage.

The piece of glass wasn’t that big and deep inside, after sterelizing the material he used, he tried to take it out of your foot with a pair of tweezers. “T-This could hurt a little.”

Jaehyun tried his best to stay calm and do it as softly as possible, not wanting to hurt you more than he already did. He placed the piece on a tissue and cleaned your wound with the cotton. You hissed, the pain was too much and now it burned like hell.

“I-I’m sorry.”

He blowed at the wound, trying to erase the pain. Jaehyun bandaged your foot and looked up to your face. You cried. Was it because your foot hurt or because of him? It didn’t matter, everything was his fault.

Jaehyun carried you to your bed, suddenly remembering the great time he had here. Not just the sex- it was everything. The deep talks, the movie nights- he missed it.

You were asleep in his arms, he looked down at your perfect face. He tugged you in your bad, carfully.

He can’t remember that he fell asleep in her living room, but he did, which suprised you the next morning.

As you woke up, you tried to walk but remembered your foot, feeling the pain once again. “Fuck!”, you screamed angrily, waking Jaehyun up. He opened his eyes slowly and saw you trying to walk out of her room.

What am I doing here? What is going on? How did I end up sleeping on her couch? Why was she limping?

Ignoring him, you made your way to the kitchen, it was a mess. You couldn’t walk properly, how were you supposed to clean this mess? You leaned against the counter, trying to steady yourself without stepping on glass, again.

Jaehyun stood up and hovered behind you. He looked down to your foot, a bandage and on the kitchen floor was blood and glass.

“D-Did I do that?”, he stuttered. Guilty, he felt so guilty and angry at himself. How could he hurt you? How could he do that to you?

You didn’t answer.

“Of course it was m-me. Y(Y/n) listen I-”, he tried to hold you, he saw that it was hard to stand.

“No! You listen! You want me to talk to you?! To scream and yell at you?! Huh?! Okay! If that is what you want! Stop fucking saying my name! Stop talking to me! Stop being near me and stop fucking looking at me! What do you want from me? What did I do to deserve all this?! All I did was to love you! Why the fuck are you infront of my house at midnight even though you have a girlfriend?! When I said I won’t come back to you, I meant it!”, you cried and yelled at the same time.

“D-Don’t date him.”, was everything he said.

“Are you even fucking listening to me?!”

“Yes! But I have no answer to your questions! I don’t know what I want! I don’t fucking know why I am here and why I can’t fucking stop thinking about you, or missing you! I don’t know why I am so fucking jealous when I see you with someone who isn’t me! I don’t know why I think about you when I am next to Dahyun I don’t know why I wish that she was you.. I-I don’t know.. what this feeling is.. I’m s-so scared it is eating me alive.”

“I-I think you should leave.”, you looked away, tears falling down. He couldn’t just tell you those things and don’t know what it meant. Jaehyun has a girlfriend, Jaehyun made it fucking clear when he told Johnny that he didn’t like you in that way and that he isn’t a replacement for Yuta.

He never was. You loved Jaehyun in a way you never thought was possible. Why was it so hard for everyone to love you? Were you that terrible?

“B-But-”

“Go to your girlfriend, Jaehyun.”

You didn’t tell Taeyong or Joy or any of your other friends what happened between you and Jaehyun that night- and morning. You tried to forget about it, but the pain in your foot reminded you always, or maybe it was the pain in your heart.

After Jaehyun left your apartment he went to Dahyun and broke up with her. Yes he wanted to date her for so long, yes he liked her. But that was in the past. It wasn’t a bad breakup, Dahyun saw it even coming and didn’t really care, she knew that there was someone else on his mind all the time. It seemed like everyone knew except Jaehyun.

“Yeah they’re talking, man I can’t believe it, I really thought it would be the last time.”, someone said as Jaehyun was drinking his water in the cafeteria with his friends.

“Yeah right, seems like (Y/n) loves Yuta’s dick.”, some girl said now behind Jaehyun. What was going on?

“Can I get my 5 bucks, I told you they’d start dating again. (Y/n) has a thing for that guy, well, after I fucked him I can tell why.”, another girl said, which made Jaehyun jump from his seat.

“What the fuck are you talking about?!”, he screamed at her. “What the fuck?”, she said. “What do you mean Yuta’s back with (Y/n)?!”, he screamed again, and slammed his hands on the table.

“They are outside talking, you asshole. What the fuck’s wrong with him.”, the girls hissed as he slammed his hand again. “If you fucking bitches ever say anything about her again, I won’t be this nice again.”

Without looking back at his friends Jaehyun ran out of the cafeteria, his eyes looking everywhere.

“Where the fuck are you, (Y/n)?”, he mumbled.

Jaehyun stepped outside the building and saw you on a bench. He rushed there but stopped walking as he heard your words.

“Am I a horrible person?”, you asked Yuta.

“Are you crazy? You are way too good for guys like us. You deserve someone way better than me and Jaehyun, we are stupid and blind. (Y/n), I was too selfish to love you like you deserved it.”

“Thank you.. I-I wasn’t sure If I really should talk to you but now I’m glad I did. Everyone I loved in my life, left me. Maybe It’s just not meant to be for me to be loved.”

“Can you leave us alone, Yuta?”, Yuta and you turned your heads and saw Jaehyun with teary eyes standing close behind you.

“Do you want me to leave, (Y/n)?”, you sighed and nodded.

“Remember what I told you.”, Yuta smiled lightly at you and left afterwards.

“Can I sit down?”, Jaehyun asked now. You shrugged your shoulders. “Yeah..”

“Yuta’s right.. I mean, I still hate him, but he is right. You are too good for guys like us. When we started hanging out, just the two of us, I was scared that it would lead to more. I was scared to lose you and scared to hurt you. And guess what? Both happened. I lost you because I hurt you because I fell in love with you.”

Now you looked at him, hearing these words for the first time.

“I swear to god I didn’t know it was possible to love someone as much as I love you, and I never thought it was possible to hate someone as much as I hate myself. I hated Yuta -still do, but I hate myself more because this time I was the one who hurt you and broke your heart, your beautiful heart which only loves and I know that I don’t deserve your love but I still love you. I hate myself for taking so long, I hate myself for letting you suffer, but I promise you, If you let me, I’ll give you the world.”, tears falling down his cheeks, he didn’t care if anybody saw him crying like a little boy who lost his favourite toy car.

“I said things I didn’t mean. Not now, not back then. I’ll regret them forever but I’ll never regret telling you how much I love you.”

Your brain stopped working. Did he just confess? Did he just tell you all of that?

“J-Jaehyun-”, you didn’t even notice that you were sobbing.

“I- I know you said you’d never come back to me, but please come back to me because I can’t breathe without you. Come back to me and let me love you the way you deserve.”, his hands hand on your cheeks, slighlty stroking your tears away.

“Jaehyun I-I don’t know what to s-say, please never break my heart again.”

“I won’t, I promise you. I love you.”, he pulled you closer, looking into your beautiful eyes.

“I love you, too.”

That was what he needed to hear. He kissed your tears away, then your forehead, then your cute nose and finally your lips. You kissed so many times already, but this time it was different, it was with so much passion and love. A kiss both of you will never forget.

You laid in your bed, no sex just cuddling and kissing. “Wait- what about Dahyun?”, you broke the kiss. “I’m kissing you and you are asking me about my ex?”, he laughed as you laid your head on his chest.

“After that one night I came here, the night I, uhm, hurt you.”, he’ll never forget the look on your face as he made a mess of your kitchen and how he hurt you.

Your hand on his chest now cupped his cheek. “It’s okay, Jaehyun. Don’t say it like you stabbed me with it yourself or something. It was an accident.”

“N-No, If I didn’t act all crazy and broke the glasses, you’d never get hurt. I’m sorry.”, his voice got smaller as he apologized.

You looked up, your eyes meeting his. “I love you. Please don’t do this to yourself.”, you placed a kiss on his lips. “Tell me how you broke up.”, you tried to distract him.

“Well, we fought, I knew that you are the only one I need in my life. She wasn’t my type anyway. Remember the restaurant? Who the fuck orders a salad?”, that made you giggle.

“What is your type?”

“You.”, he stroked your hair.

“Why? Why do you love me?”, you asked.

“Because you are you. You are my best friend, my better half- my soulmate. You laugh at my stupid ass jokes- not even I think that they’re funny. Everytime I look into your eyes, I feel peaceful and happy, I can breathe next to you and be a little kid, the way you eat- it’s crazy i know, but you look so adorable. I love how you eat anything you want and how you cry or laugh at any movie we watch. A comedy? You cry. A romance? You cry and laugh and a horror movie? You cry, laugh and hold me tight because you get scared so easily.”

“Why.. why are you so.. are you even real?”, you hid your face into his neck and cried.

“Baby, do you remember our first night? We watched 'my best friends wedding’ and I swear to god he loved her so much but I know he was scared. I watched it a couple times when we were.. apart, and I knew that I couldn’t live without you. I couldn’t imagine losing you- the thought of you marrying someone else, I don’t even want to talk about it, because I’m the only one marrying you.”

“A-Are you asking me to be your wife right now?”, you couldn’t believe your ears.

“Yeah, don’t worry baby, I already have a ring.”

“J-Jaehyun are you serious?”, you got up and looked at him with wide eyes. “I’m kidding baby. Still got no ring, but I’ll promise you that I’ll marry you.”

“I love you so much, oh god.”, you hugged him tightly and tangled your legs with his and placed kisses on his jaw and neck.

“You know baby.. I love having sex with you, too.”

“Of course you do..”, you looked each other deep into the eyes and kissed, nothing mattered anymore, you loved each other so much, sometimes it felt unreal.

Spending the rest of your lives together was everything you wanted, together forever.

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