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#if you're truly a professional then how is that behavior professional
erenjaegerwifee · 2 months
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Obsession
Survive the Night: Day 7
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Paring: Neteyam x Fem!Omatikaya!Reader
Warnings: MDNI 18+, manipulation, yandere behavior, crazy and delusional reader, mentions of killing, stabbing, blood, poisoning, explicit language, praising, sweet hard sex, love making? PLOT TWIST, p in v, mirror sex, virginity loss, choking, orals (f & m receiving), belly bulge, lactation kink, breeding kink, pregnancy kink,
Word Count: 6.9k
Disclaimer: All of my characters are aged-up! If that makes you uncomfortable please feel free to scroll and don’t read or interact with my post or account.
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Neteyam’s father and your father are best friends, ever since his first time jake was introduced to the omatikaya clan all those years ago, they developed into close friends, there was nothing Jake did without your father by his side, they passed their rights of passage together, earning their ikran at the same time. They went on every hunt together and introduced their wives who became great friends as well. They even had children at the same time, all kids were both within months of each other, that includes you and Neteyam.  
You have always been a shy small girl, your only imagine to the world was innocence, you wanted no part in the hunting of Eywa’s creatures or just fighting in general. Even though you are the oldest, your siblings and the sully children made it their business to protect you; you don’t even carry a knife on hand just in case, someone is always by your side, sometimes even Tuktirey.  
Now, even though people perceive these things about you from a very young age, doesn’t mean you are unaware of how to use them, one could argue you are the best weapons master in the clan, you wield a bow almost as well as a professional archer, you have seamless movements with a knife of any kind and you even have amazingly good aim on a gun. But if anyone thought you were the kind of girl to pick up a knife and murder someone, well you would be in a lot of trouble.  
I mean how could you not in these situations? Any sane person would. You have had a crush on Neteyam for practically your whole life, well it’s not really a crush now, it’s more like you are in love with him, you truly believe that no other man would come close to satisfying you the way he would. Everyone knows you like him, but no one is aware just how deep that love runs, it’s in your veins, your blood, every cell in your body screams a want for Neteyam Sully and only him.  
It really irritated you the way women throw themselves do foolishly at your man like you're not going to do anything about it, for example the time you walk into the sully kelku to see your siblings and the sully kids sitting in a circle, “Hi everyone” you smile sweetly as they all greet you before your eyes catch an unfamiliar woman. You do not socialize much, the extent of your friends sits in this room and you are content, you see no need to look for more company, these people care for you and well, your man is already included in this circle of friend, so who on Eywa’s planet is this girl? 
You were previously going to sit next to said man but your space is taken, you wipe the little pout of your face and move to sit next to lo’ak who is the only one who seemed to read your mind, “Hey angel! What’s up?” your eyes dart to neteyam and the girl and you pout innocently at Lo’ak, “Oh nothing, just finished my shift at the healers hut, who’s that?” you said gesturing your head to the girl. 
She sat close to him, a little too close, her hand rested on his arm as she laughs obnoxiously at whatever joke he just said. She wants him, Neteyam isn’t that funny, but there he was smiling victoriously at her laughter, it made you sick. How dare he, that should be you laughing at his lame jokes. It should always be you.  
“That’s Akira, she is Neteyam latest escapade, personally I don’t really like her, she’s not that nice to everyone else” you soak in his information plotting how to fix this broken situation, you glance at her throughout the time you sat as you speak to everyone else, always subtly cutting off her sentences with your own sweet voice or purposefully ignoring her and changing the topic, it was clear she was getting a little more than irritated at your actions until she finally snapped and shouted at you to ‘shut the fuck up and stop interrupting her’  
Your heart beat picks up and you look at her startled before the water works form making her look bad for yelling at sweet little you, it surely made everyone dislike her more than they already did, that included Neteyam giving her a mean side eye before he came to sit on the other side of you to wipe your tears. He felt protective of you because of the innocent aura you put out. It is only natural he is a protector, your protector.  
It got worse for her though, after that day a week later Kiri invited her to one of your infamous girl days, you guys usually hang out and braid each other's hair, all that fun stuff. But this time she tried so hard to insert herself and honestly, she is a nice girl, it really was her fault for trying to fuck your man like that. Kiri ran home to get the combs and beads you forgot by accident leaving you alone with her.   
She was the one who brought up talking a walk, you thought it was strange but decided what’s the worst that could happen? She isn’t leaving here with her life anyways. You walk deeper into the forest and made your way next to an incredibly steep cliff, you knew if someone fell down there, no one would be about to find them. It was perfect. You walk over closer to the edge looking down at the rough flowing river beneath you ignoring her cautious words to be careful, she shouldn’t have come out here with you if careful was what she wanted to be.  
You stop a pretty looking flower growing right off the cliff, it wasn’t that far but you could reach it but Akira, she was taller. You called her over in a sweet voice and activated that innocent look you use to get your way and asked her to pick the flower for you. She stretched her neck to see it before getting down on her hands and knees bending down over the cliff to get it. You took a quick glance around before you kicked her off the cliff. 
You stood up watched over the cliff as she fell but caught herself on the same branch the flower was on, she looked up at you begging for you to save her but come on, you weren’t nearly as strong enough to pull her heavy ass up, not that you were going to try, you sat on the edge resting one of your feet on the branch before looking at her terrified expression, listening to her pleads you smile sickly, “You should have thought about what would happen to you before you got all up on my man, in case you aren’t sure which man that is whore, its Neteyam he is my future mate, he is going to love me forever, you well your trash. And now I get to through you out”  
You tilt you head laughing wickedly at her when you strike down the branch with a sharp blow breaking it. You watch her fall to her screaming death; it is only when her body fell into the rocky waves did you step back and walk to the clearing you were previously seated at.  
You made good time too, Kiri came back a couple minutes after you without suspecting a thing and asked about Akira’s whereabouts, you brushed her off changing the subject after saying ‘she wanted to go for a walk’ which wasn’t a lie. The day passed and the clan sent trackers out looking for her, Neteyam was distraught, but why is the question, you got rid of his problem not his life. You rolled your eyes but still sat next to him saying the obvious lie ‘I’m sure she will turn up.’ Her dead body was found 4 days later, broken up and ravaged by animals down the river about 2 miles from the clan. 
In the end that worked out easily for you, all of them were not so easy to make happen, like the time with a different girl Sura, she was a warrior like Neteyam, she trained alongside him every day. It was no secret she didn’t like you, she always thought your innocence was fake, while she was right no one believed her dumb comments because you would always cry, she was a bitch when you had to be the one to patch up her wounds, everyone was under the impression you were scared of her. 
It worked out well for you, since she already didn’t like you, it was easy enough to blame everything on her. It started simply with you playing a little more dumb than usual but not enough for people to get suspicious of you. Just enough to piss her off though. She liked Neteyam so you made it your business to be present whenever you could, bringing him food, refilling his water bottle, even just sitting and watching him train. 
Not that he ever said anything but you know he liked having you around him like that, paying real attention to the person that he was and not his title or his cock, not that you would mind paying attention to that cock, you see the bulge in his loincloth all the time, makes you want to wiggle your ass against his crotch and make him mount you. But you don’t mind waiting for it, I mean he is your future husband, he’ll mount you eventually.  
One day you got to the training grounds a bit earlier than Neteyam on purpose, it was great because you knew Sura was already there, along with a few other warriors in his training unit. You sat on a log spewing some dumb shit and laughing obnoxiously with the group making sure your voice was dumb and pitched just the way she hates it.  
It worked out well when she started making fun of your voice making some admittingly good insults but it wasn’t fun for her when their group leader, Neteyam catch her doing so and scolded the entire unit, making them all run laps after laps while he wraps your crying figure in her arms comforting you for the rest of the session. The look on her face was beautiful jealousy.  
When everyone dispersed and Neteyam trailed after one of his warriors to speak with him, he left you alone with her. Big mistake. You walked up to her and as she was about to tell you off like a big girl, you grab the knife off her hip and stab her in the stomach watching her fall to the ground, “remember bitch he is mine. You did this to yourself when you decided to touch what wasn’t yours” then you stab her again for good measure in the neck watching the blood ooze onto the green grass.  
Afterwards you take the knife and stab yourself in the thigh and then pulling it out and screaming Neteyam name so loud you made the surrounding birds fly away. When he came rushing back to you, you cried some bullshit about how she attacked you saying she was in love with him and you were getting in her way. He wrapped up your wound with a cloth and picked you up in his arms and ran to the healer's tent.  
It was amazing how no one questioned your story but how could they be when you were crying so hysterically you didn’t want to let go of Neteyam, when they did rip you out of his arms and pushed him out of the tent so they could work on healing your wound, you cried murderously in the hut, the entire clan heard the commotion and screaming you caused just wanting Neteyam to be with you. You fought and kicked and screamed not wanting to be anywhere else other than in his strong arm.  
He sat outside that hut listening to your screaming of his name feeling horribly, he thinks it’s all his fault you were hurt and now he can’t even help you. Tears sting his eyes as he heard your pitched voice calling out for him to make them stop hurting you. Lo’ak sat right next to him with a hand on his shoulder knowing it was hard for Neteyam to keep it together.  
After that for the next few weeks, you wouldn’t leave Neteyam’s side. Saying how grateful you were he was there to save your life, how safe you feel with him like no one can hurt you, you even slept over at their house every so offend with the excuse of being without him would put you in danger. Both your parents thought it was cute how stuck up you became on him, how well he took care of you, always making sure to clean and dress your wound, helping you get back on your feet and walking properly. He even went as far as to skip out of hunting trips because you cried about how much you didn’t want him to go. And neteyam never complained, he sat without you through the tough nights and all the crying episodes like a real husband would, you knew he was your perfect one and only, now he has to see that.  
The cycle repeated itself for a few years, girl meets Neteyam, girl wants neteyam, girl tries to make a move, girl dies. The endless cycle is getting a bit tiring honestly, you are ready to be mated now, you saved your virginity just for him while he was out and about sticking his dick in anything that breathes. You aren’t supposed to be mad, but the thought makes you fume. He has you, why would he want anyone else. 
You can’t count how many times you had an interaction with him and ran away to take care of yourself, or when you would go home for the day hot and bothers to stick your fingers into your already wet cunt, not the mention the nights you spent next to him when you would use his hand, grinding on his fingers to get some release while he’s asleep, those are by far the best times. 
The point is you are tired of having to do it on your own, you put so much work into this relationship, why can’t it just go your way for once, but low and below neteyam has other plans, his new girl, Nanti. Shes a fellow healer like you, you don’t really consider her a friend but she is a nice girl, she has done nothing but treat you nicely, until you saw her sitting next to Neteyam on the log about 30 feet away from you.  
You know she is a great healer, but not better than you though. But she is one of the healers that specialize in poison, she works mainly to find cures for the different poisons that have been exposed to the na’vi. Her team makes real head way, they do good work. But she did make it awfully easy to frame her. 
For the past few weeks since she has been hanging out with Neteyam, you started to spend more time with another woman in that unit of healing, your excuse being you wanted to expand your healing horizon, and who would question such a sweet girl? You learned about all kinds of different liquids and powders along with their antidotes that can easily kill people in minutes. You questioned and questioned until you found the perfect one. It was a light blur powder, almost grey that when added to any liquid it immediately melts blending in the drink. It was taste less and odorless, and best off all it had an antidote, it was perfect.
Despite you wanting to use it on her, you decided you killed the last girl, you should take it up a notch so you can really get Neteyam to yourself for good. The poison only takes a few minutes to take effect but you are such the antidote works effectively as soon as you inject it. The poison is meant to thin your blood so you start to bleed internally before you die. It was fast working though, killing fully grown na’vi in just 20 minutes.  
Since tonight was yet another clan celebration, you decided it’s the perfect time to carry out another one of your sick plans. You walk up to the group sitting next to Nanti casually, you slip your drink slowly, that already had the poison mixed in it and paced yourself until you had to pee. When you got up you handed your drink over to Nanti to hold until you returning making sure at least one person saw you do so.  
When you did return after a few minutes you took the drink back from her and took a big gulp then a few more to finish the drink in the next few minutes, then you waited. It was a nerve racking few minutes you almost regretted it but you knew earlier on you had slipped the antidote shot in Nanti bag making her look even more suspicious, why would you have an antidote if you didn’t have the poison? 
When you coughed for the first couple times it caught the attention of Lo’ak and Kiri cutting off their conversation to ask if you are alright, after you said you were just fine, they continued. Then you had a second coughing fit this time Neteyam noticed and it was a good time too because this time you coughed some blood up into your palm. You look up at Neteyam with teary, scared eyes. 
He made quick work pushing Lo’ak to get their dad who was sitting a couple tables away drinking with norm and your father and he rushed to your side. When they arrived, you glanced at Nanti a couple times to make sure someone knew you suspected her, Lo’ak was the only one who noticed, everyone else was caught up on helping you.  
Norm whipped out his tablet and took a blood swap rapidly testing it to find out what was causing you to cough up blood, when the test came back positive with the specific poison Lo’ak was quick to speak up, “Nanti what the fuck? What did you do to her?” 
Neteyam tried to defend that bitch but Lo’ak was quick to cut him off, “You are thinking with the wrong head idiot, she is the only person here that knows this much about poison.” Neteyam was shut up after that and Nanti took her turn to speak up, “What?! I didn’t poison her! She was hanging around my healing unit the pass couple weeks she has just as much knowledge as I do” she really tried to defend herself but Lo’ak wasn’t buying that and truthfully now neither was Neteyam, “And why would she poison herself?” Neteyam spoke up looking up at Nanti that stood next to his crouched figure next to you. 
“You- *cough cough* poisoned me?” you stutter out looking up at her with scared eyes, “Antidote?” you asked to no one in particular ignoring the way she pleaded for everyone to believe she didn’t poison you. “There is an antidote but, it takes about 30 minutes to properly make, you only have about 10 minutes left...” Norm said solemnly as if you didn’t stash and antidote in Nanti’s bag, but to be fair he didn’t know that. 
Luckily for you it clicked in Neteyam’s brain, she wouldn’t bring poison without an antidote, just for good measure. While Lo’ak and your father were arguing with norm to at least to make the antidote, Neteyam stoon up to Nanti, towering over her, “Where is the antidote?” his voice was eerily calm. She stepped back away from his figure telling him the same ‘I don’t know.’ Neteyam didn’t let her get far when he yanked her arm causing her to yelp catching the attention of the other men.  
“I’m not letting her die, where is it?” he ignored the growl of his name coming from his father as they try to make him let her go, “Neteyam I didn’t do this! I do not have the antidote, see?” she emptied the contents of her bag on the floor and the injection fell out. You watch her expression fall to her ass when he picks it up handing it to norm to inject you. He ignored her pleads towards him when he kneeled next to you once more at your side. You were in so much pain but you wanted so badly to laugh at her expression. It was amazing the things you can do when you set your mind to it.  
 After the celebration was over you were laying in the healers’ hut resting until the antidote works its way through your entire body properly, it stopped you from dying but the poison was still in there. Lo’ak and your sister sat next to you making jokes trying to cheer you up when Neteyam walked in. He had been previously discussion forms of punishment with his father about the matter and they settled for death. It wasn’t fair to her since she didn’t do anything but you could not find it in yourself to be mad about it, she did this to herself.  
You turned away from him ignoring him when he walked in and kneeled on the other side of you, you know your sister and Lo’ak saw you do that but didn’t interrupt when Neteyam tried to get your attention. “Angle are you ok? Feeling any better?” he asked in a soft voice as he ran his large hand over your head. “Am I ok? Are you out of your mind Neteyam? I don’t even want to have to explain this to you” you roll your eyes and push his hand off you. “What? What are you-” he started but you cut him off 
“Do you seriously not see this pattern? Every time you bring one of you girls around me i get attacked or insulted and not poisoned. How you counted how much times one of your little girlfriends has called me dumb or stupid? Like the time I got pushed off that high tree, or when that one crazy bitch stabbed me? It was all because I wanted to be your friend, all because I wanted to be around you. I almost lost my life today because another one of your crazy chicks tried to kill me. Just stop dating at this point” you look up to the ceiling pretending to stop the fake tears that begin pouring out your eyes. 
Neteyam feels awful it’s all his fault, he didn’t mean for those things to happen to you, and you are right, you truthfully have been by his side through thick and thin. Anything that has ever happened in his life you were a part of. It wasn’t fair you had to go through all of this just because you wanted to be around him. “Honestly bro, you’d both probably be a lot safe of you dated each other. We would stop having to ward off horny men cause Eywa forbid a woman approached your girl and she would stop dying every month”  
Neteyam rested on the comment for a minute before you spoke up, “Oh please, I’m not his type.” you roll your eyes wiping your tears. Neteyam gestured for Lo’ak and your sister to leave before he responded to your comment. “Who said you aren’t my type? I happen to like crazy girls apparently, although, those other chicks weren’t crazy, were they? You just had fun framing and killing them.” 
His words catch you off guard, before Mo’at busted into the healing tent telling you that you were cleared to leave. His words didn’t stop pondering in your mind as soon as she left you innocently questioned him, “What? What did you say?” you asked confusedly. “Why don’t I get you home then we can talk” he didn’t take you to your home, he took you to his. 
Neteyam had recently built an extension of his family hut for himself. A room equip with everything he needed including privacy because he is of mating age now and when he does bring a woman home, he wants her to be comfortable. He pulled the flap to the main entrance of the family hut for you to enter in and you see Jake and Lo’ak sitting in the common area talking. You both greet them and they ask how you are feeling which you give a sweet, ‘fine’ before following Neteyam into his private quarters.  
Neteyam closes the heavy flap behind you and walk deeper into the room siting on his bed and left you standing next to his desk that he bolted a mirror above. “So back to business? I know you’ve been killing people, that doesn’t sound like you at all” Neteyam’s tone of voice was amusement, if he knew all the horrible things he did, why did he not stop you? Why isn’t he mad? “I don’t know what you’re talking about” your tone is soft like most times you speak to people. “Oh, cut the shit angel, you don’t have to lie anymore. I know all about your little side hobbies” you make eye contact with him now, “And what side hobbies are those?” you grit your teeth slightly. “Well, first of all, I know very well that you like me, but I’m having trouble wrapping my head around just how much. I thought about confessing I liked you but then I caught a glimpse of your twisted little mind and thought I knew how much you liked me but I was so wrong so I decided to wait to see how far you’d take it. I must say angel I commend the dedication.” his words run through your head as you take in everything he says. 
“What glimpse?” you blurted out. Neteyam chuckled and sat back on his bed leaning on the wall. “Sura, I saw you stab her in the neck, I heard you spew those sweet words about how I’m yours, about how she just signed her own death sentence and I saw you stab yourself in the thigh before you screamed out for me, how do you think I got there so quick” your blood ran cold, he saw all that, you thought you were careful. “I- I” he laughed again, “I should have felt angry, scared, you killed my girlfriend but instead I was so fascinated by the way you killed her in cold blood like that, and all for me?” he raised a non-existing eyebrow at you with a sexy smirk on his face.  
“Now tell me baby? You love me that much? You poisoned yourself just for me to stop seeing a girl? You know she got the death sentence for what you did. Do you even feel a little bad? You know if that secret gets out the clan is gonna have your sweet pretty head on a stick” Neteyam got off the bed and walked towards you slowly making you match his pace stepping back until you hit the wall next to his desk. 
Your loincloth was slick, when he rested his huge arm over your head on the wall and dipped his head down closer to yours. His body came closer with a few small steps pressing you more onto the wall behind you. His hair created a curtain hiding you both from the world as he brought his lips closer to yours, “I did it all for you Neteyam, wanted you to love me and other women kept getting in my way, I just wanted to be with you, I don’t feel bad. You aren’t gonna tell on me, right?” your voice was a seductive whisper as you tip toed to bring your lips closer to his. 
You felt his breath on your tongue when he whispered back to you, “Of course not, you’re my girl, always been my sweet girl” before he kissed you for the first time. His lips were warm and wet, and he tasted so sweet like the fruits he had eaten earlier. The hand that wasn’t above your head ran over your waist and hips gripping and pulling your bottom half closer to his body. 
Your hands came up around his neck bending your body upwards on his. Neteyam is much taller than you, by a foot at least, your height ends right around his chest. You whimper into the kiss pulling away for air and look up at him, Neteyam didn’t wait another second after you inhaled and kissed you again, the hand that was on the wall ran down the length of your body squeezing the flesh that was under his fingers. Neteyam held you by both your hips and lifted your body off the floor, you wrapped your legs around his think waist and he seated you on the desk next to him. Your ass touched the cold wood and made your hiss in his mouth before he detached and kissed down your neck. 
Neteyam sucked and kiss down your neck listening to you moan and whimper under his tongue, he pulled away untying your top and tossing it over your shoulder letting your pretty tits bounce freely. He didn’t waste a second kissing down your breast, tugging your nipples with his tongue and one of his hands. Neteyam pulls away and squishes them together looking down at your pretty purple nipples, “Such pretty tits baby, you were hiding these from me all this time?” he went back down to sucking on your nipples. 
“I wasn’t hiding Tey I-I didn’t know if you wanted to see them” your voice was breathy as you spoke taking in the feeling of Neteyam pinching and biting your nipples. “So sensitive” he mumbled into your skin. He didn’t waste much more time before he pulled you off the table catching you when you stumble a bit when you touch the ground. He turned you around and you saw your reflection in his mirror. Your messy hair, naked chest, swollen lips from his intense the kiss was. Then his hand, his big hand rubbing over your nipples and up to your neck choking you slightly. He tilted your head up and he bent down meeting you in the middle for another smearing kiss.  
His body pushed yours up to the desk rocking it slightly as his other hand ran down to your ass squeezing the flesh. He rutted his harden bulge into your ass making you whimper into his kiss. He pulled away untying your loincloth while he keeps eye contact with you, “tey...I have a secret” you said looking up at him, he hummed in response asking you to tell him, “I-I’m still a virgin, wanted you to be the one to take it.”  
Neteyam let out a hearty groan dropping his head on your shoulder as he played with your tail making your face heat up. “Fuck baby- really? for me? You never let anyone in this little cunt?” his voice was strained as he spoke to me. Neteyam always knew you were an innocent girl, even after he found out about your murderous love for him, he had no idea you’ve never lost your virginity to anyone. Of course, you just keep surprising him, killing someone you have experience but you can’t take cock...yet.  
The thought made neteyam excited he felt his dick twitch thinking about what a tight little cunt you must have, you never let anyone in there before it was unmarked territory. He couldn’t wait to tear you open with his big cock, like a kid on his birthday. His grip on your body tightens when you shook your head ‘no’ and he throw your loincloth to the side somewhere forgotten. Neteyam didn’t wait another moment before he dropped to his knees resting both hands on your ass cheeks. Your hands were not placed in front you holding yourself up on the table as you looked back, down at him massaging the fat. He spread your cheeks open catching a glimpse of your wet cunt, he let go and did it again multiple times. 
His chest rumbled from the sight alone, he couldn’t believe he got you so worked you, and to find out you were a virgin he just knew you were touch starved, knowing it was only from his touch made his cock hurt in his loincloth. He watched the slick shine between your folds, he thinks it’s so pretty, your cute cunt shining for him, all slicked up he just wants to taste you. And that’s exactly what he did.  
Neteyam spread your cheeks apart wider and shoved his face in sticking his tongue out and gliding it up your folds collecting the slick in his mouth. He groans vibrating your ass, and you roll your eyes back feeling his tongue flick you clit. “Fuck angel, taste so good for me, smell so fucking good too”  
It caught you off guard when slotted his nose in there but you weren’t complaining, he was going at it. He sucked on your clit flickering it up and down, side to side, he was pushing all your bottoms so perfectly. You heard from other women getting your pussy ate felt good but you had no idea it would have felt like that. “Ah ah Neteyam!” you moan out. 
His tongue slides up to your ass wetting your other tight hold making you clench. He noted the way your body reacted too it but decided he would play with that little whole another day. “Yeah, baby feel good?” his mouth went straight back down to your slit licking and swallowing down your slick, Neteyam was drinking it, fuck the thought sent you wild, you shut your eyes imagining how sexy he must look down there pleasuring you, how fucking good it must be to see his Adam's apple bob when he swallows your juices.  
It made you a little shy but your moans and whimpers over power your feeling of shyness, his tongue feels so good, makes you wonder where he learned to do that. Neteyam sucked harshly on your clit sending you cuming on his tongue and he slurped up every bit of it, he didn’t want any to go to waste but you gushed so much on him, your juices overflowed his mouth running down the length of his neck to his broad chest... 
When the overstimulation kicked in, he pulled away and raised himself to his feet and press up against your back. “Neteyam that was so good” you slumped against him with a weary smile on your face. He chuckled and picked you up bridal style and put you down on the bed gently and untied his own loincloth now letting it join yours on the floor, he walked up to your face stroking his cock right above your nose. Your eyes crossed as you watch his insane size in front of your face as he slowly strokes it. Glowing pre-cum dripped from his tip falling on your lip. Your eyes rolled back when you dart your tongue out and tasted it, he was so sweet. You heard women say their male companions were salty but not Neteyam. He really was perfect for you. 
You stuck your tongue out of your mouth waiting for him to stick his cock in but he smiles and taps his tip on your tongue. Feeling his heavy tip hit your tongue drove you insane, when he slapped your tongue the last time your mouth caught him sucking on the tip.  
You pulled away to change your position so you’d be more comfortable, flipping over onto your stomach on your hands and knees, sticking your ass up in the air and swaying your tail as you turn your head to the side and take him in. “Fuck -fuck baby- suck on it- yea like that” he threw his head back hissing at the feeling of your small mouth around him.  
He talked you through your first time amazingly, praising you, “look so pretty with my cock in your mouth, wanna take a little more?” he pushing in deeper watching your cheeks full out with his cock stuffing you full, “Doing so good babygirl, so good” Neteyam groaned and hissed feeling your tongue circle his tip before he pulls out completely. “Not cuming in there babygirl”  
He turned you effortlessly for you to lay on your back, legs thrown around his slim waist and he crawls on the bed over you, “Are you sure you're ready for this?” he asks you. “Neteyam I've wanted this for years, fuck me...please” you look up at him seductively again making him question how he took so long to mount you. He smiles and leans down for a kiss as he rubs his tip between your folds. 
When he starts pushing in you break the kiss with a sharp gasp but his lips don’t move from yours, he stays right there while he slides his huge head into you. Your eyes screwed shut and your fingers dig into the skin of his muscular back. “Tey- too big...” you whimper out looking at him with glassy eyes, “Taking me so good baby just a little bit more” your tail comes to wrap around his thigh, your legs feel weak and the rest on his back, his tail comes up and wraps around both your ankles as to keep you close. He sings reassurance to you telling you how good you're doing and how amazing you feel clenching around his cock until he’s fully inserted into your snug cunt.  
His head drops down onto your shoulder as he tries not to cum yet and your breathing picks up at the feeling, you have never been so full before. “Nete-” you stutter his name wiggling your hips slights as the pain subsides wanting him to move. When he starts thrusting shallowly, you mewl out scraping down his back. Neteyam brings his head back up to your and kiss you, you don’t kiss back too caught up in the feeling of your pussy stretching out. 
He bites your bottom lip pulling it and when you clench on his cock he moans like a chain reaction, Neteyam raises his body to look down at his cock disappearing into your small hole and reappear, he finds nothing more interesting than watching the way you take him in so flawlessly. “Tey, faster please, fuck me faster, so good” he looks up at you when you plead and watch you prop yourself up on your elbows to watch his cock fuck into you as well. 
You bite your lip when he speeds up his thrust making you tits bounce, it garbs his attention almost immediately and he quickly gets caught up in making them bounce for him. He speeds up his thrust more becoming a bit rougher with you but not enough to hurt you. Neteyam holds back almost everything he has so he won’t hurt you, he wants nothing more than to pound into you and suck on your tits until he’s drawing milk and making you scream.  
The thought sends his mind spiraling, he can’t wait to see you breastfeeding your children, his children. To see you get round and swollen pregnant with his babies. When he knocks you up, he’ll have to bend over your pregnant form just to kiss you when he slots his cock inside, or when he dips his head down to flick your swollen nipples in his mouth tasting the sweet milk that dips out on his tongue. He wants it so bad, he wants to knock you up, make you forever his. 
“Baby I’m gonna cum- cum with me, lemme knock up this sweet cunt. You wanna have my babies, right? Gonna let me give you my babies?” he rambles out of his mind rutting int your tight cunt, “Yes yes please tey! Wanna cum! Want your babies pleaseee!” you cry out for him gushing in his cock. Neteyam is quick to follow pumping his cum deep inside you, he thrust a couple times before he drops his heavy body on top of yours. 
After a few minutes he fixes himself on the pillow dragging you along so he doesn’t have to pull out of you, as early as this relationship was, he wants his seed to take. When you rest your head on his pillow you inhale deeply taking in his scent and bringing yourself closer to his chest. “Hey baby” he grabs your attention making you hum. “Was Akira your doing too? Like what happened there?” he asked softly as he strokes your hair. You mind runs back to the memory and you decide to be honest, “Pushed her off the high cliff into that one rocky river” you wrap your arms around him and snuggle into his chest. “You have to stop killing people now you know” 
“Neteyam if people staying in their lane they wouldn’t have been hurt, or framed, or killed. It’s there out fault when they step in my way.” Neteyam chuckles even though you just admitted to half if the crimes in the clan, you did it for him. Why would be complain. 
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i-drop-level-one-loot · 9 months
Note
You know, it would be interesting for me to read the gloomy Disney characters. By the type that the Reader accidentally enters the Disney world. Or is already in this world. For example, a man! The Evil Queen× reader. Just imagine that the mirror says that the most beautiful is the reader and the man!The evil Queen was interested.. Well, or dark! A man!A Disney princess who believes in love and believes that the reader is his true love and that the reader should belong only to him.
Sorry for the bad English
Don't apologize
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You're perf, babes
Yandere!Genderbent!Evil King x GN!Reader x Yandere!Genderbent!Snow White
CW: Death, obsessive behavior
"Magic mirror on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?" The vain king asked his enchanted mirror as he often did whenever his pride was wounded. King Hadewig was the envy of men and women. Cold and beautiful, his features were cut like an ethereal ice sculpture. Intelligent, talented, and ruthless, most everyone either wanted to bed him or be him. However, his power was not guaranteed for long.
Hadewig was King only by responsibility, and not by actual title. His title was, legally, Prince Consort. He married his, now deceased, wife when he was a young bachelor, and she was the only eligible bachelorette of suitable status as a widow. Being so much older than him, it was an "unfortunate", but not "unsurprising" passing of the crown when the Queen died and left her son in Hadewig's care.
The only reason the child wasn't immediately crowned king was because of Hadewig's charm and influence, convincing the court that the young Prince Snow was too irresponsible to rule the country. But it was difficult to continue that lie going, even with Hadewig purposely keeping Snow ignorant of his future kingly duties by treating him as a servant, for now the boy was twenty years of age, and truly should have not only been coronated years ago, but also wed off to the available princess of the neighboring kingdom, a woman as old as Hadewig.
But his potential loss of power wasn't the reason for his low self esteem that day.
"You are, my king. There is one who approaches, but does not yet share with you what makes you fair."
The king slumped in his seat in an uncouth like manner. "Then why does my hunter not look at me like a man?"
King Hadewig's personal hunter, an immensely talented killer that didn't just slaughter animals for the king. And the only person who simply looked at the king. Nothing Hadewig did could change the professional look on (Reader's) face during their meetings. No matter how charismatic he was with his words, how stylish his clothing was, nor the love potions he attempted to spike (Reader's) drinks with, they were seemingly immune to every one of his attempts. In their most recent meeting, the one that left Hadewig depressed, he had offered his hunter a glass of wine, which they turned down, stating that the last drink they had received from the king did not agree with them.
"I can not tell you that, my lord. I only can report what I see, so unless your hunter speaks their secrets out loud while I spy, I am blind to their feelings for you."
Hadewig groaned, upset and broken hearted.
"Show me my hunter, again."
The face in the mirror melted, dissolving into an image of (Reader) leaving the castle. Their strong frame sent shivers down the icy man's spine. His first and only marriage was one of political importance, with no love or warmth between the husband and wife. But in the presence of his Mx. Hunter, the king was set ablaze. The intense feeling of heat was dowsed when he witnessed the bastard he hated most in the world approach his hunter.
At the steps of the castle, Snow had been timidly watching the triumphant hunter from afar, gathering the courage to approach them. He had never known shame, never feeling any sort of embarrassment about the state of his dress, but in the presence of the person who always smelled faintly of iron, he was reduced to two inches tall.
Stepping lightly like a mouse, the short adult snuck up behind (Reader), still debating whether or not he was actually going to announce his presence.
His decision was made for him, however, being noticed by (Reader) almost immediately.
"Good afternoon, your highness." They said, turning sharply on their heel to face him.
The hunter was the only person to address the prince by his royal status.
"Ah- how did you know it was me?" He asked incredulously. A pink blush warmed his entire head, wrapping around the back of his neck and up to the tips of his ears.
"Because I could hear you." (Reader) offered a kind smile to the shy, younger man. They felt sympathy towards him, with the way his cold step father treated him. With what they had done to him.
Snow was impressed by how cool (Reader) was. And a small part of him wished to impress them as well. He tried to straighten out his worn out rags. "What brings you to the castle today?"
"To gift the king a wolf pelt. And also," (Reader) reached into their pouch, pulling out a pressed flower, "to gift you this."
The prince sucked in his gasp, wide eyed and lips pressed tight.
"I apologize for not finding something better for your highness."
"No!" He panicked, grabbing the flower with both hands. "It's beautiful!"
He hadn't received a gift since the passing of his mother.
"Happy Birthday, your highness." (Reader) bowed, then turned swiftly, leaving the young man hyperventilating and sweating.
Only the king and his mirror heard Snow whisper long after (Reader) left: "I love you."
Three days later, and the king was losing his mind over the interaction. Snow was visibly taller, standing straighter as he worked, singing as he cleaned the castle grounds, and it was bothering him.
Hadewig kicked over his chair in frustration. "Magic mirror on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?"
"The one you fear is getting stronger, the confidence has warmed his winter, and people shall notice his spring awakening. The prince now glows more brightly than you, whose anger has etched lines of hatred into his ice like face."
King Hadewig released a scream, losing his control before quickly sharpening back up, running his hands through his messed hair.
He left his study, storming over towards a frightened servant.
"Send for my hunter."
Before (Reader), the king was disheveled, worrying (Reader) something awful.
"I can not stand for this disrespect any longer." His gaze read cold and cruel as it pierced the hunter's. "You understand that you are mine, correct?"
(Reader) thought about the flower and felt a wave of anxiety. "Yes, your highness."
"You understand that you belong to me?"
"Yes, your highness."
He sighed ever so slightly, before retrieving a wooden box from his desk. "I have another assignment for you.
Kill my son."
Nausea threatened to erupt from the seasoned murderer. "My lord?"
"Take him deep into the woods, and bring me back his heart." He held out the box. It was a test, as though (Reader) hadn't proved their loyalty to the mad man enough.
The empty box was heavy in (Reader's) hands.
"As you wish, your highness."
Prince Snow spun in the field of flowers as he searched for the most beautiful flowers for the hunter. It was the best day of his life! His father had given him a colorful outfit that fit him and the hunter had asked him out on a date! Well, they didn't call it a date, but what else could it have been?
He wove a crown for (Reader) while imaging their wedding day, becoming King and Royal Consort and having a real crown placed on their head.
(Reader), however, was weighing their options, not truly paying attention to the prince, and trying to ignore his childlike excitement.
What would the king do, if he was made a fool?
"Oh, hunter!" Snow ran over, holding out the delicate crown. "I made this for you! May I?"
And that was all it took, for (Reader) to spare his life.
They bent down, feeling the weight of the crown on their scalp. It smelled nice. Before Snow could retreat, (Reader) wrapped their arms around his thin waist. They had killed so many people before, but this was only the second time they felt unbearable guilt.
The first was after they took the life of the Queen.
"(Reader)?" Snow stuttered out, feeling weak in their strong arms.
"You must run, your highness." (Reader) whispered into his ear.
"What?"
"The king has ordered me to kill you. So please, run. Far away, into the woods." They released the prince, and it was only then that he noticed the heavy bags under their tired eyes.
"Why? I don't understand-"
"Leave. It won't be long before that witch discovers my lie."
Snow fell to his knees, holding onto the edge of (Reader's) shirt for dear life, falling apart in front of them. "Please, no! Come with me! If he would kill me, what would he do to you for sparing me? Please, run away with me!"
(Reader) bent down to release his fingers from their hem, planting a kiss on his forehead as they did so. "I hope when I meet you again you will have found a name more worthy of such a warm and kind person. For as of this moment, Prince Snow is dead."
Excitement threatened to crack the King's cool demeanor as he observed the bloody heart in his hands. (Reader) was distant, but that didn't matter to Hadewig, for now there was no competition for his hunter's affection. They would soon be his, even if he had to use force to make it so.
"Excellent work, my faithful hunter." He offered a practiced smile, unnerving (Reader) who prayed that the pig heart made a convincing decoy. At least until they could escape and hide out in the mountains, far away from the King's eyes.
(Reader) gave a deep bow. Then they left, calmly getting on their horse, and leaving, not taking a single glance behind them as they sped off, emergency bag already packed on their steed.
Back in Hadewig's room, he caressed the box affectionately, thinking about his lovely hunter. The stress had certainly caused a frown line, just as the mirror said, but he was working at reversing the damage.
"Magic Mirror on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?" He dreamily asked, slightly nervous that the rage had permanently ruined his perfect face.
"Hiding deep within the woods, tending a wounded heart, the fairest in the land hides. Prince Snow still lives."
The king scoffed. "I have his heart right here, mirror."
"No, within that box lies the heart of a pig."
The box fell from Hadewig's hands. "A pig..?" His face scrunched up painfully. "(Reader) would never betray- they belong to me! ME! Guards! Where is my hunter?!"
"The hunter is flying towards the mountains, away from the woods they released the prince into."
Hadewig collapsed at his desk, screaming in agony while pawing at his chest. "No! It's all his fault! Find me that little bastard- I'll kill him myself!"
The seven dwarven women listened to the young man recall his tale of woe, his eyes full of tears but a smile still on his lips. "So, if you please, could I stay here? Just until my love returns for me."
Happy sighed dramatically, blushing and twirling her beard. "That (Reader) is so brave~"
Grumpy smacked the back of her head. "That double crosser may have saved the prince, but that doesn't mean they won't double double cross him!"
Bashful stomped a foot. "It's true love! They would never!"
"Well, they never confessed their feelings," Doc said while cleaning her glasses, "they could have saved Snow out of the goodness of their heart."
Snow smiled, trying to calm the fragments of his heart. "I have to believe, to hope, that (Reader) loves me as I love them. To risk death for me.. but, they said we would meet again. And I trust them."
It was painful, knowing that his father wanted him dead, but what was worse was hearing that (Reader) had put their life in danger for him. Despite all the pain and punishment Snow had endured, he never held it against his step father, but now..
A dark, bitter seed had been planted.
And throughout the night as the household slept, Prince Snow could feel it grow, threatening to burst forth from his chest. The dwarven women were so kind to him. So inviting, and trusting.
He wondered what else they would do for him.
The dark haired man knew that the apple was poison from the moment it was placed in his hands. What kind of elderly man would be this far out away from any sort of town, especially if they were traveling to sell produce? He didn't know who the old man was, but knew that he must have been in cahoots with the king.
"Oh, I don't have any money." Snow said quite sadly, placing his head in his hand.
"For such a lovely young man? Free of charge."
"Are you sure?"
The old man was certainly no real beggar. Nothing made sense. It was cruel, what Snow thought to do, especially if he was wrong, but in case he was right.. Snow whispered to a bird before smiling brightly at the stranger, taking the apple in both hands.
"Of course, please take it!"
Snow bit into the fruit, but did not swallow, hiding the chunk in his hand. After a few seconds of pretending to chew, he collapsed, holding his breath.
The king almost immediately dropped his disguise, snarling. His once similarly raven hair had a stripe of grey.
In a voice barely louder than a huff, he said "It serves you right, you filthy bastard. I would have let you live, if you had simply left my (Reader) alone."
He exhaled. There was no movement from the floor.
"Are you dead yet? Can you still hear me? I hope you can." The king smiled. "I hope you can hear me from beyond the grave as I finally get my happily ever after."
But as he celebrated the dwarves rushed home from work, and a small bird was rallying forces to find the hunter and lead them to Snow's body.
As he monologued to what Hadewig assumed was his son's corpse, the women returned from the mines, righteously horrified and armed with pickaxes.
Hadewig heard a woman shout "Grumpy, don't!" before a pick connected with his lower back, piercing his organs from behind.
The pain was excruciating, sending fire up his body as blood poured out of him. He imagined (Reader's) face, finally smiling for him as they cradled him in their arms, accepting his love. Hadewig wanted that to be the last thing he saw before he died.
Instead, he witnessed Snow, smiling up at him from the floor.
(Reader) arrived just a moment too late, having been closer than they had expected due to how deep into the woods Snow had traveled. They witnessed the sobbing dwarves sitting at the door, too upset to enter their own home where the young prince they tried to rescue lie dead.
The hunter pushed passed them, not wasting a second to grab the young man. He was still warm, but wasn't breathing.
Snow kept his eyes closed as he felt the worst pain he had ever known.
(Reader's) hands slammed into Prince Snow's chest. A rib cracked under their strength, but Snow refused to show it.
Then their lips pressed against his.
His nose was held shut as (Reader) forced air into his throat, trying to get him to wake up. They continued the repetitions a medicine man had taught them while blowing air into his lungs.
"God damnit, Snow, wake up!"
They leaned in, and felt him breath against their mouth. His large brown eyes fluttered open, and his face reddened.
His lips curled into a weak grin. "You came back for me.."
Guilt washed over (Reader), hugging him tightly to their chest. "I'm sorry I left, Prince Snow."
Warm hands ran through (Reader's) hair. "Please.. Call me Theros."
The regret and pain kept (Reader) still, allowing the recently "revived" prince to pull them in for a kiss.
After all that (Reader) put him through, a kiss was the least they could do.
But for the born again man, it was just the beginning.
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mypoisonedvine · 1 year
Note
now here’s a thought: jonathan crane being seduced by one of his patients
I WAS SERIOUSLY THINKING ABOUT THIS LIKE A JOKER/HARLEY QUINN MOMENT!! aaaand that's how it turned into basically a whole ass oneshot, oops
hook, line, and sinker - 1.6k words
warnings: manipulation, sexual themes/groping (18+ only please), fluff but with a dark-ish twist
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"Sometimes I think you're the only one who understands me," you admitted shyly, biting your lip and looking down at the tile floor beneath you.
He leaned in a little closer, resting his arms on the table between you. "You know," he replied, his voice softer than you'd ever heard it though not quite a whisper yet, "sometimes I feel the same way."
You smiled as you looked up at him again, finding a new brightness in his eyes. "Really?" you beamed.
"Yeah," he agreed, laughing, "I really enjoy our little talks. I mean, sometimes I can't believe I'm getting paid to see you."
Giggling a little, you remembered the first time he let his guard down with you, just a bit; for weeks he'd easily dodged any personal questions, clearly knowing it was a slippery slope to countertransference and an inappropriate relationship. Unfortunately for him and everyone who had insisted that Arkham was the only facility you'd never be able to escape from, you knew from the beginning that you could use him.
You could smell it on him: that deep, overwhelming loneliness. You were far too familiar with it yourself to miss it in someone else. Sure, he kept it hidden under layer after layer of intelligence, professionalism, faked normalcy-- but it was there, and it was calling out for someone else to truly see him. You saw him from the second he walked in that armored door, back when they still kept you in the jacket; now, months later, you'd convinced him you weren't a threat and that he was the one in control of these sessions.
The other facilities, with their inspiration murals and their bean bag chairs, they were a breeze to break out of. You knew that Arkham Supermax was going to be an entirely new challenge, but you'd been preparing since the beginning. Each week with Dr. Crane, you got him to be a little naughtier for you-- first it was as simple as convincing him to let your sessions go long, leaving everyone else waiting as you poured your soul out for an extra half hour. Convincing him that you needed him, that only he could help you. Then it was the praise-- you're changing my life, I've had so many shrinks and you're the first that really listened, you're so incredible-- all that shit he'd probably been craving since his daddy didn't hug him enough or something.
Once you'd given him some compliments, he returned one to you: you made up some sob story about your low self-esteem just to get him to admit that you were attractive, and you took the compliment with a coy little thank you, Dr. Crane... that's high praise coming from you.
Then it was contraband, just little stuff. He snagged you an extra serving of dessert on your birthday; he brought you a copy of your favorite book, as a reward for increasingly good behavior. Sometimes you thought about just asking him straight-up for a metal file or few paperclips, but that would be risky-- you could throw away all your work if you jumped the gun too soon.
Then there was the journal... you knew, no matter how much he swore he wouldn't, that he was going to read that fucking journal. You couldn't be sure if that was always the plan, or if it was just a temptation he would eventually surrender to, but you wrote all these fucked up little fantasies in that journal and imagined how he'd have to loosen his tie when he read them.
Back in January: Dr. Crane keeps asking about my nightmares, I couldn't possibly admit that I've started having sexual dreams about him...
And then there was the entry from March: I didn't mean to upset him yesterday but he snapped at me when I was talking about my anger-- he said I wasn't taking accountability-- and when he got stern with me I felt myself getting wet, is that bad?
And the best one yet, just a few days ago: Dear diary, I swore I wouldn't tell anyone what he told me, so I won't even tell you-- but I'll just say that when Jonathan showed me his mask, I fell totally in love with him. People are always hiding who they really are, but he knows me, and now I know him, too. I know I should feel guilty, but I don't. I know we're meant for each other.
Your heart was racing as you realized it might all pay off tonight. Listening to his rambling rants about fear and society and humanity, journaling about your 'crush' like a schoolgirl, making doe-eyes at him during sessions-- it was all about to happen, you had him in your pocket.
"Sometimes, I..." he began again, looking down at your hands shackled to the table, "I think about seeing you more. When I'm not even here, I mean..."
You pretended to be surprised by that. "Really? I mean... do you think about just talking to me, or...?"
He smiled a little, his face turning a bit pinker. "Do you think about us doing more than just talking?" he turned the question on you instead.
"Doctor, I--"
"Jonathan."
You had to fight off a smirk; you reached forward across the table, jingling the chains that held you down, but they were just long enough to reach to his hands. You gently brushed your fingers over his, hearing him sigh as he opened his hand for you to place your hand in. You ran your middle finger delicately in a line along his palm, and he shuddered a bit. Hook, line, and sinker. "Jonathan," you started again in a low purr, "I think about so much more than talking."
"Do you ever think about... about if we could be together...?" he pressed, closing his grip to hold your hand. After this long of a seduction, you couldn't deny that touching him in such an innocuous way was getting you a little hot. Just because you were manipulating him didn't mean you were completely faking an attraction, he was sexy-- and gullible. You liked that in a man.
Trying to look conflicted, you glanced away. "I try not to imagine that," you explained, "it's... it's not possible, with me in here. I'm fine with this, if this is all I can get-- seeing you three times a week for our sessions, telling you things I never thought I'd tell anyone. I can be okay with that. Just knowing you feel even a fraction of what I do is like-- it's like-- I don't even know how to describe it. It's amazing."
Leaning in even more, he reached up and held your face-- tenderly, reverently-- and you shut your eyes as you leaned into his touch. "I wish I was as unselfish as you," he replied, "but I need more-- I need to really be with you."
You brought your hand up to hold his, jerking the chain a bit. "I need-- I need you, too," you mumbled. "Please, Jonathan," you begged in a whisper as you opened your eyes to meet his wanting gaze, "I wanna be yours."
He sat up and leaned over the table in a split second, kissing you hard; you had to tilt your head back to accommodate the height difference as you were still sitting, and it made it even easier for him to hold your head like they used to in those old Hollywood movies-- the ones they showed here on Thursday nights, but you weren't allowed to go because you 'didn't integrate well with the general population' or whatever.
As he kissed you, hungry but relatively reserved, it was you that took it further: carefully running your tongue over his lips, opening your mouth for him to claim, having to hold back a grin when he moaned softly against you. "Touch me," you begged him in a rare moment of reprieve from the kiss, "please-- I've wanted you to for so long--"
He groaned a little as his hand slid down to your chest, opening one button of your uniform jumpsuit; he kissed your neck as he dipped his hand inside, groping your chest underneath the fabric. Your hips naturally rocked forward in the metal chair, your deprived body desperate to be filled after almost a year of forced celibacy in this prison. "Fuck," he mumbled against your skin, tweaking a nipple between his fingers, "you know we can't-- not here--"
"I know," you purred, only barely able to reach his shoulder with your hands chained-- otherwise you'd be running your fingers through his hair, holding on to his neck, pulling him closer. "But I need you-- I don't think I've ever needed anything this much..."
He shook his head; "Me either," he admitted.
"I need to feel you inside me."
He growled, grip tightening on your breast, and you smiled proudly. "I can't just leave you here," he realized, like it was his idea. "We need to be together-- outside of this place."
"I'll go anywhere with you," you promised him.
Pulling back and looking into your eyes, he brought both his hands to your face, brushing your hair aside quickly. "If I do this for you... you have to promise me. You have to be mine."
"Can you really do that?" you wondered. "Get me out?"
"I'll find a way," he assured, "I'll do anything."
You smiled up at his determined expression, flashing your best big-wet-needy eyes at him. "Jonathan," you cooed, "I'm already yours."
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kalki-tarot · 10 months
Text
CHANNELED LOVE LETTER FROM FUTURE SPOUSE ♡
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my readings are for entertainment purposes only! tarot is a divination tool. it is not a substitute for medical and professional advice, nor is it meant to be taken as such. i don’t take responsibility for any choice(s) made by you or others regarding my readings. please be mindful of your own choices and actions ♡
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PILE 1
Hello beautiful/handsome,
I saw you in the party, where everyone was busy with themselves, with their own groups. And you, you were sitting alone, pouring your own drink. You looked very beautiful to me. Just like a queen/king. Your straightforwardness and dominant behavior, is what I love the most. I crave you, dear. Oh. I can literally fight to win you. You are just like a prize. You have your priorities clear. Even if it's a run and chase, I'll follow you everywhere till my heart stops and i die.
You are very career oriented, you don't bs unnecessarily. I love your perception of life. I love how you stand up for yourself, even if you're alone. You are just like a Queen to me. You seem very distant, as if you're lost in your dreams. You have that dreamy side of yours too? I don't know. I just observe you from afar. You give me such soothing vibes, I just love being around you.
You make me forget my miseries. I love how you don't do wrong to anyone. You are very compassionate and loving. You can give love to even non living objects. You're so full of love. That makes me wanna love you, even more. Sweetheart. I love you. I want to pursue you, i want to make you mine. Do you think the same? Do you love me just the way I love you? I'm waiting for your answer.
Yours faithfully,
Love.
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PILE 2
I don't have the right words to truly express what I feel. I'm not in a good place right now. It feels as if everyone has given up on me. I'm sorry if I'm I'm making you uncomfortable but certain situations are out of my hands. I feel left out in the cold. I have the responsibility of my family on my shoulders. I'm trying to make fast changes. I'm trying to do everything on my own.
I'm very repressive of my emotions. I was not taught how to deal with them. Sometimes I try to run away from life. But then I get reminded of you. I look at the night's sky, full of stars and I wonder maybe you are like a star too. Lightening the dark and cold world with compassion and warmth. You give me true strength. And I'm forever grateful for your presence in my life. I'm holding onto a lot of things right now. I know i should let everything free, even myself. It's okay to make mistakes, right?
After every storm, there is a deep silence. Where everything remains silent, destroyed and out of control. No matter what life throws at me, I'll come back to you with ten times more strength, power & especially love and respect for you. It's life after all, right? Everything comes and goes. Maybe these times will pass? But I'll love you more with each passing moment for sure.
Yours Only Forever
💗
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PILE 3
I have too much of love and wealth. And that too much is being sucked off by others. I don't know what to do. Money can't buy love, sweetheart. I'm in a toxic relationship. They are taking away my everything. Literally everything.
I don't remember the last time I laughed. The money I earned through hard work, the morals and kindness my family taught me, everything is in vain. Everything is slowly leaving my body. I feel empty from inside. This person is taking away it all.
But I'm working hard, more hard, harder than even. So that I can provide you a better lifestyle. I can't expect anything from anyone. I have to do it all alone. Please remember me in your prayers. I'm afraid to let go. Everything is being taken away from me. I don't know what to do, I'm confused. I'm not sure which road to take. I believe the universe will guide me where I'm supposed to be, near you. I'm depressed nowadays. Very hopeless.
But I'm doing whatever i can do right now. I'm unable to even sleep at night. They lied to me. They deceived me. They were my life partner, but there was nothing "life-like" with them. It was just a relationship built on money. And you know how these type of things end. There is no emotion left in me. I'm blank. I don't know. They left me in the middle of the road.
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PILE 4
Hello pretty soul ♡
You know what? I see you every where. Whenever I go, wherever I go. I see you, i get reminded of you, by the flowers, the clovers, the river, the clouds and even the sun! You are a beautiful and positive person! You are such a great fighter! Whatever obstacles comes between our happiness, you remove it all. I get so happy and optimistic near you, my love. I'll fight with literally anyone for you, just for you.
You bring absolute calmness and peace into my chaotic life. You are a sweet breeze flowing softly over my cheeks on a warm, sunny day making me blush. I want to take care of you and love you for eternity. I want to offer you all the love that I have inside me, just for you babygirl/boy. I want to experience new things with you everyday. You make my life feel lively. ✨️
Dear, sometimes I too get lost in my past, that was not, unfortunately that happy for sure. I got lied to, i was betrayed by someone I called mine. I can't sleep properly due to this. I get nightmares and I get so f*king scared. I feel anxious and uncomfortable. But the good news is! I'm forgetting it day by day. Just a little progress makes it a whole lot of progress. I don't want to remember all these with you. I'm working hard, I'm moving forward. And i hope you're too <3
By,
Your one and only . ❤️
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doubleddenden · 7 months
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Bro. She just wanted to play fucking Neopets man. She wanted to move on with her life and start over with fucking Neopets after regaining her will to live.
Idk if those three did this of their own accord or were threatened with termination if they didn't, but still? I'd rather have been fired. With their following it'd be easy as shit to start over. Even still, Nijisanji has displayed not only unprofessional behavior, but outright toxic and harassing behavior.
Like holy fuck. Not even a little class about this whole situation.
She survived an attempted suicide caused by a toxic work environment and poor management, so you fire her.
She tries to regain her life by restarting her old channel, so you release a business statement- officially aimed at investors- and say her termination will be ***negligible*** to profits.
She opens up a store and hits a subscriber milestone of 300k before her stream back. Knowing the internet hates you right now, YOU CHOOSE TO SELL MERCH instead of properly addressing and apologizing.
ON HER FIRST. GAME STREAM. BACK. After she has gone through mental hell, knowing she is suicidal, knowing she was looking forward to playing FUCKING. NEOPETS. Just to be fucking happy again. To do something her management wouldn't let her do. You have 3 of your top talents- timed at PRECISELY THE MOMENT SHE GOES LIVE TO START A NEW CHAPTER OF HER LIFE, JUST WANTING TO MOVE ON- release a "statement" that not only seems to be basically a loosely scripted "no u" statement, but also shoots themselves in the feet by revealing SOMEONE violated the fucking LAW to open case sensitive documents to disclose certain information to them- which is illegal, because only the lawyers were supposed to know those details. During her own stream, Doki started crying and had to end after only 30 minutes to contact her lawyer, but god damn she tried her best to keep a brave face and laugh it off.
And then. And then. Anycolor CEO makes a statement of his own- you know shit is bad when the CEO makes a statement, so what does he do first? Apologize- to INVESTORS.
That is just fucking CRUEL. That is cruel, and fucking STUPID by having Elira, Vox, and Ike say that shit, because the smarter thing for those three to have done in that situation would either to LEAVE if they were truly "besties" like they kept saying like Pomu, Mika, and other talents did (or are in the process of like Kyo), or like the other talents seemingly are smart enough to do, SHUT THE FUCK UP.
I will reiterate on the off chance anyone reading this thinks about auditioning: never aply to it. Go indie or try another company. For on the even OFF-er chance you ARE part of it: leave now, go indie, try another company, or shit do like Pomu and go back to school to try something else.
This was not professionalism, this is straight up targeted harassment at this point. At this point, I hope Doki takes the company for every fucking penny they're worth. You don't get to act like you're the ones in the right after clear and OPEN harassment and bullying, let alone whatever the fuck went on behind the scenes.
I didn't even care much for Selen other than she was Mumei Hololive's real life friend, but I'm actually somehow even more furious over today than i was in my last post about Doki's situation. How can you treat a human being like this? How can you, in a professional setting, behave this way and pretend you are the good guys? I didn't care about her before, but shit, I respect her now even more for standing up to that shit.
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ohara-n-brown · 5 months
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The way people talk over Black Autistic people is... Mind-Boggling. Truly.
There are so many people in the autistic community that genuinely believe that them and Black Autistic people have the same experience, and that everything Black Autistic people go through they go through as well.
That's NOT TRUE.
Black Autistics face more questioning and doubt than White Autistics do.
Yes, all Autistics face doubt.
But when White Autistics face doubt they're often told 'You aren't autistic' - as in YOU in specific are not Autistic.
Meanwhile when Black Autistics face doubt we're often told 'You CAN'T be autistic'. Not just 'You aren't', but you can't.
As in 'You physically, biologically CANNOT be autistic because you are black'.
Do you see the difference?
I've had multiple people say to me 'I didn't know you can be black and autistic', or 'I didn't know black autistic people existed.'
Our mere existence as an entire GROUP is called into question. Because of our race.
No one will ever say 'I didn't know you can be white and autistic' because Autistic Representation revolves around Whiteness.
-
And yes, 99% of people with autism had communication issues.
But if you're a white autistic person you have never had to decode micoagressive racism through the lens of your autism.
- Especially at risk of your safety or life.
Allistic black people already have to carefully choose our behavior and wording with law enforcement under threat of imprisonment or outright on-the-spot execution.
Now imagine having to navigate conversations with law enforcement while also autistic.
Especially knowing that most of the time when a mentally disabled person is killed by law enforcement - they are usually also black.
Elijah McClain and Ryan Gainer - both autistic AND BLACK. Osaze Osagie - also black.
So even if you say that all autistic people experience this, it's very clear that Black Autistic people face it to a higher, more dangerous degree.
We are not 1:1. We are not the same.
This doesn't even factor in things like having to learn to codeswitch or speak AAVE. Or how predominately black schools have less resources for their autistic students.
Or how many professionals in mental health DON'T diagnose black people because they've never studied the Black Autistic experience, and thus cannot spot it.
Or how many Black people that ARE identified to be neurodivergent are instead labeled with ODD or BPD instead.
There are so many layers and factors to this that cannot be ignored.
The autism community needs to get better at understanding intersectionality. We need to get better at representing Autistics of color for ALL levels.
And y'all need to stop talking over Black Autistics. Our experiences are not the same. And that's okay.
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jintaka-hane · 5 months
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Put the goggles on
Masterlist
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Two idiots who don't dare to make the move
🥽 Paulie and you have been dating for three months.
🥽 A year ago, you were hired by Galley-La Company as an accountant to assist Iceburg in financial management. As part of your professional responsibilities, you had to meet with different foremen every 15 days to evaluate the procured materials, their expenses, and how they influenced the company's financial performance.
🥽 The accounts with Paulie never added up, so you found yourself forced to see him more often, which allowed you to get to know each other better. Every time you met with him, he would have a stupid grin on his face, and everyone around you noticed.
🥽Two bets were made behind your backs at the company. The first, that Paulie would fall in love with you and ask you out within a year. The second, that you would turn him down. 
🥽They got the first one right, but missed on the second.
🥽 Long before he even gathered the courage to invite you on a date, you could sense his interest in you from his nervous demeanor whenever you were near and the awkward way he expressed himself. You found his shyness endearing, but you were determined that if he wanted something with you, he had to gather the determination to ask for it himself.
🥽 When he finally gathered the nerve to ask you out, it was a bit of a disaster - stumbling over his words and blushing like a teenager. You thought he was incredibly cute, and knowing he's a good guy, you decided to give him a chance. You had already had enough with superficial and egotistical men.
🥽 Now, you are in a sort of relationship.
🥽 Your dates are innocent, going for walks, dinner, or to the movies, him always treating you with respect and never crossing the line. At most, you've managed to hold hands without him fainting from the embarrassment. He's so in love with you that aside from the ropes he carries hidden in his clothes, he always reserves one for you, just in case you ever need his protection.
🥽 You've never had any problems with showing your body, but knowing him, you try to take it slow, always opting for simple clothes like long jeans, and T-shirts that cover your belly. You're confident that over time, he won't get so nervous.
🥽 He believes you're not dressing like this for him, but that it's truly your style, and he respects you a lot for it, thinking he's found his ideal woman.
🥽 The problem will come later...
🥽 The first kiss comes. You decide to take the step because you know if you don't, it'll never happen. At your doorstep, just before saying goodbye, you grab him by the jacket and press your lips against his. He turns completely red, his ears burning, and his goggles fogging up, but to your surprise, he responds quite well and goes along with you. However, he keeps his hands in his pockets to avoid touching you while you're kissing.
🥽 As the days go by, the kisses become more frequent and linger a bit longer, but he never touches you more than, perhaps, caressing your cheeks. He wants to respect you as you deserve.
🥽 The problem is that you don't want him to respect you anymore...
🥽 This situation begins to frustrate him as well, and unconsciously, his mind starts to conjure scenarios he's ashamed of, situations where you do embarrassing things to him and vice versa... sometimes involving his ropes. He feels deeply guilty for his imagination, and in an exaggerated sense of extreme loyalty, he decides to save himself for you for when the time comes, refraining from... pleasuring himself. If you're a chaste goddess, he wants to be worthy of you.
🥽 You're not a chaste goddess and you're starting to grow impatient.
🥽 Days pass, and the man is like a damn pressure cooker about to explode. He's always tense and in need of relief as soon as possible, but he won't do it. For love, he won't do it.
🥽 You know him well enough to notice that he's under a lot of tension, especially evident in his increasingly frequent rough behavior with others (never with you). You decide to take a step to address it, and one night, before he leaves after the goodbye kiss at your doorstep, you invite him in. The invitation catches him by surprise; it's late, and it might not be socially acceptable for a man to enter a woman's house at that hour, but eventually, he accepts.
🥽 Entering the living room, you invite him to sit down while you prepare some beverages in the kitchen, giving him some time to get used to the surroundings. When you return with the drinks, you see that he has taken off his goggles and has seated himself at the far end of the sofa. You sigh and sit down on the other side. For a few seconds, you both look at each other.
🥽 He's deeply ashamed to even entertain such thoughts, but he feels an overwhelming desire to suddenly grab you, tear your clothes off, and take you on the couch. Yet, he's terrified that you'll see it as disrespectful towards you. He's convinced that if you're with him, it's because of how he behaves with you, and he fears that if he acts on his impulses, you'll think of him as nothing but a damn pervert. He doesn't want to lose you.
🥽 You're consumed by the desire for him to suddenly grab you, lay you down on the couch, and take you right there, but you're terrified of hinting at it and having him think you're easy, risking losing his interest. You don't want to lose him.
🥽 You both remain seated on the sofa, maintaining a safe distance, talking about uninteresting topics, without anything happening, in an awkward and uncomfortable situation.
🥽 In a moment of tension, he stands up under the pretext of going to smoke on the balcony, stepping out into the cold night with the hope that it will clear his head and provide him with some idea of how to approach you without scaring you.
🥽 You remain seated on the sofa, watching his silhouette in the balcony window, pondering how you can get closer to him without scaring him. And suddenly... an idea strikes you. Perhaps with him, instead of removing clothing, adding more might work! Determined, you grab his goggles from the table and put them on.
🥽 He prepares to enter the living room with a downcast expression, thinking he hasn't a clue how to approach you and fearing you'll become frustrated and leave him for someone more assertive. As soon as he steps into the room and catches sight of you, he freezes in place.
🥽  You're standing on the table, smiling broadly, with both hands on your hips. Looking at him, you say cheekily: "Look at me! I'm a foreman at Dock One! Specialized in rigging, knots, and masts. What do you need, sir?"
🥽  He stands there, gazing at you without moving for a few seconds, until gradually, a blush appears on his cheeks. A shy smile begins to form on his lips, slowly widening until it transforms into a hearty laugh. You find yourself laughing too, pleased that your ice-breaking idea has worked. Then, rushing towards you, he sweeps you up in his arms embracing you tightly, and kisses you passionately.
🥽  You return the kiss, wrapping your arms around his neck as you feel his hands slide down your back beneath your shirt, caressing your skin. "At last!" you think to yourself.
🥽  With a determined move, he scoops you up in a bridal carry position as you gasp in surprise. "Where's the bedroom?" he asks, unable to separate his lips from yours.
🥽  "At the end of the hallway," you respond instantly, reaching for the goggles to remove them.
🥽 He swiftly grasps your hands to prevent you. "No, please..." he says with a mischievous grin on his face, "keep them on".
.
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mysteryshoptls · 7 months
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SSR Azul Ashengrotto - Platinum Jacket Voice Lines
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When Summoned: Priceless artwork like the halls as far as the eye can see... This is a fantastic opportunity to polish up my artistic sense of appreciation.
Summon Line: Basking in the fine arts is a fine way to forge your imagination. We should learn well from this and enjoy this very worthwhile time together.
Groooovy!!: Love is wonderful. There is no end to the troubles that come from it, so it's quite a favorable emotion for those of us who impart counsel.
Home: How splendid this 100th Anniversary is.
Home Idle 1: Floyd's freewheeling behavior doesn't change even at a museum. He may be a moray eel, but he is nothing like either of the two who served the Sea Witch.
Home Idle 2: I saw Vil-san looking at a painting intently, and when I asked what he was doing, he said he was studying the beautiful posture. He truly is a professional.
Home Idle 3: It is an exhilarating feeling when a piece of work you had your eye on increases in value. It confirms my intuition was on the money, as it were.
Home Idle - Login: If any painting catches your interest, please don't hesitate to ask me about it. I do take art as one of my courses. I may be able to briefly explain it to you.
Home Idle - Groovy: Jamil-san seems to have an expert eye for art. I'll make sure to stay friendly with him.
Home Tap 1: I hear the Lord of the Underworld was a shrewd dealbroker. Not only would I love to hear his stories, I would also love to get my hands on documentation with any details!
Home Tap 2: Many entrepreneurs hold some artistic hobby of some kind. Knowledge of art, literature and music can be very useful when it comes to business discussions.
Home Tap 3: If Ortho-san were to use his sensors, I'm sure it would be quick work to identify any forgeries... If given the opportunity, I should inquire him about that.
Home Tap 4: I wonder just how many of the merfolk the Sea Witch helped. She was one of the greats, I would not be surprised if the count was in the hundreds... No, the thousands.
Home Tap 5: This shell is based on the one worn as a necklace by the Sea Witch. Isn't it just grand?
Home Tap - Groovy: Oh my, I see how your eye shines so... If you've taken a liking to that painting, I shall order a reproduction for you. At a discounted price, of course.
Duo: [AZUL]: This is quite the dire predicament, Jamil-san. [JAMIL]: Doesn't seem to me like you're worried one bit, Azul.
Birthday Login Message: Oh, have you come to request something of me? It would be my pleasure! Please, tell me what it is you'd like. No matter how difficult the task, once it is entrusted to me... Eh? You'd like to prepare a birthday card for me? ...Heh, I think you'll find that person a difficult one to please. But very well, may I ask what message you'd like on the card?
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Requested by @pianostarinwonderland.
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femmefatalevibe · 1 year
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Femme Fatale Guide: How To Cultivate Self-Discipline
Know Your Why: Always Keep The End In Mind 
Keep Small Promises To Yourself. Make Them Non-Negotiable. 
Create And Consistently Log Your Progress 
Take Temptations Out Of Sight 
Find Indulgences To Help You Focus On Your Goals 
Know Your Why: Always Keep The End In Mind 
Decisiveness drives discipline. You need to clarify and define your goals. State them clearly with their authentic purpose in mind. If you seduce this end goal into your life, what desire are you truly fulfilling? Ex. If you want to lose 10 pounds: Is it to feel healthier? Look better in a bikini? Fit into a certain pair of jeans? No matter how superficial, identify the genuine reason why you want to achieve a certain goal. Whatever reason elicits a visceral and emotional reaction. Sometimes, especially during a busy work day, your reason could be as simple as wanting to lessen your anxiety and ease into a more relaxed state. Any purpose that resonates. Once you have an emotional response tied to a goal, it becomes infinitely easier to motivate yourself to take small steps towards achieving it. Where energy goes, energy flow. Simon Sinek goes more in-depth with this concept in Start With Why.
Keep Small Promises To Yourself. Make Them Non-Negotiable.
Think of performing self-discipline rituals as confidence-building exercises. This action helps you trust yourself, establishes a sense of integrity, and builds self-confidence. For example, if you stick to your meal and workout plan for 5 days a week, you build trust in knowing you're more powerful than your cravings and are capable of taking good care of your body. If you complete a project on schedule (personal or professional), you prove to yourself that you’re efficient, build confidence in your ability to finish tasks you start, and self-affirm that you follow through on your ideas. Finishing that book this month reflects confirms that you value yourself enough to expand your mind, learn, and expand your knowledge base. Eventually, through enough consistent repetition, these rituals into unconscious habits that you do effortlessly in daily life. 
Create And Consistently Log Your Progress 
You can’t manage what you don’t measure – your finances, calorie and step counts, workouts, productivity, etc. Tracking data related to your habits – such as your spending habits, eating or workout patterns, writing word count, and task completion – on a given day or week – allows you to understand and analyze your current behavior. What habit cues, environmental or other situational factors are keeping you from sticking to the current task at hand? Do you leave your running shoes stuffed in the back of the closet? Junk food in the house? Work from bed or with your phone by your side? Are you avoiding certain emotions? Does this data change when you’re stressed or tired?  
Awareness is the first step towards redirected action. Analyze these data points to see your pitfalls and strategize how to help yourself. 
Take Temptations Out Of Sight
Set yourself up to win. Get the phone away from your workspace, remove any junk food or soda from the house, delete apps, or silence notifications from people who distract you from your goals. Self-discipline becomes significantly easier when you have to take additional steps to indulge in your vices. Replace these temptations with helpful cues to help you build healthier habits that lead to self-discipline. Give yourself visual cues to move you toward your goals. Keep a journal with a pen next to your bed. Leave your workout clothes and shoes out near your bed. Write a quick to-do list right before finishing work for the following day, so it’s easier to jump into the first task right away the next morning. Cut up some produce or do a 30-60 minute meal prep once a week to eat more healthful meals. Find ways to make it easier to stay on track than give in to temptation. 
Find Indulgences To Help You Focus On Your Goals 
Self-discipline shouldn’t feel like deprivation – of certain foods, pastimes, or activities you enjoy. Buy cute workout clothes you feel confident in. Create the most dance-worthy playlist. Make it a priority to buy your favorite fruits and vegetables every week. Rotate a selection of your favorite healthy meals. Leave your sunscreen out – front and center – on your bathroom counter. Find a big, beautiful water bottle to keep on your desk. Purchase aesthetic notebooks, pens, planners, journals, and other office organization items. To make self-discipline feel like second nature, you need to marry indulgences and your desire to meet your goals. Discover the habits that work for you and find small ways to make these tasks more enjoyable. 
Go easy on yourself. Build one habit at a time. Self-discipline is like a muscle. It requires time to build and grows in increments. Try to stay on track and more focused than yesterday. Your only competition is your former self. Find pleasure in the process. Focus on the immediate task in front of you while also keeping your future self in mind. 
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mochinek0 · 9 months
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Daminette December 2023: 10-Defeated
Damian sat at his desk and briefly scanned the files of the new departments he was overlooking. One of them was the art department, which he was greatful for. The only thing that bothered him was the fashion department. He didn't agree that it was art. It was business. Clothing was a necessity, not a luxury. Clothes could be sold in stores. Art was meant to be displayed and shared. The Wayne heir scanned the file again.
'Head of fashion department was listed as Marinette Dupain-Cheng. I'm sure I can get rid of her and move the department. Nothing will get in Damian Al Ghul-Wayne's way.'
The Wayne heir approached the fashion department. He saw the office door open and observed the inside. There was a small woman with blue hair drawing on a tablet. He could see a gown forming under the movement of her stylus. Damian stood tall as he knocked on the open office door, but she never turned around.
'Brat.'
"Miss Dupain-Cheng!" he shouted.
To his surprise, the designer slammed her hand down on her desk and glared at him.
"You made me mess up." she snarled, "Who the fuck so you think you are to come in here and bother me?"
This wasn't the type of meeting he had been expecting at all.
"Damian Wayne." he answered, not use to people glaring at him, "I wanted to inform you that I will personally be keeping an eye on the department and see if it's truly necessary."
"Fine." Marinette snapped, "There's the door. I'm busy; you can show yourself out."
Marinette turned back to her tablet and began ignoring him, again. Damian couldn't believe that she didn't get scared by his name. She talked back to him! Damian walked out and slammed the office door.
'What a horrible person. I'm not just gonna get rid of her; I'm gonna fire her entire department! I'll just exploit her weaknesses and show that she's incompitent at her job.'
Marinette had noticed that Damian taking to lurking around her department. He had inserted himself into meetings and questioned everything: Is what you're buying necessary? How could it help Wayne Enterprise? Why did you choose this fabric? Why this shade? Why not vermouth?
It had been six months and she was ready to punch him. Mari had heard rumors that he was starting to neglect other departments he was covering. She couldn't understand his fascination and distaste for hers. After another grueling meeting, everything came to a head.
"Miss Dupain-Cheng, I highly suggest rereading the code of conduct." Damian stated, in front of the entire department.
Marinette could feel everyone's eyes on her, "And what have I done now, Mr. Wayne? I don't believe 'bow down' is a rule."
"Your behavior and attire are innapropriate in the work place." Damian commented, irked that she still went against his authority.
"Excuse me?" Mari shouted, "I am completely professional!"
Damian snorted, "You regularly seduce your staff."
"I wish." someone whispered, loud enough for everyone to hear.
"Mr. Wayne," Marinette spoke, "please, tell me how my business attire is innapropriate so that I may correct it."
Marinette knew she had him this time. She still made all her own clothing and inspected them the day before for any rip or loose seams. She wore button up blouses with short sleeves and a blazer. She made sure to wear pants as she didn't want to kneel in a skirt. Was this about her heels? Sure she didn't wear four inches like everyone else; she preferred something that was easy to move in. Especially if something had gone wrong and she needed to hurry to the other sde of Wayne Enterprise.
Damian's eyes roamed over Marinette. Her clothes were the same as they had been for the last six months, they hugged her curves. When she took off her blazer, he could see how her neck curved, especially when her hair was puled up in a messy bun or ponytail. He had seen her hair that way, too many times, when she was busy designing. Not to mention how her pants accentuated her when she yelled at an employee for ordering the wrong fabric. Those stupid tops that she crossed her arms under her chest when someone contradicted her.
"Well, Mr. Wayne." Marinette called out, "I'm waiting. Tell me which part of my outfit is the problem, right now. I'm buttoned up and tucked in. My pants go all the way down to my ankles or are my ankles distracting someone? I certainly can't be distracting someone with a foot fetish, as I don't wear anything open-toed. There are many more employees, here at Wayne Enterprise, that dress provocative."
"Are you sure?" the Wayne heir questioned.
"I can name five ladies on this floor alone!" Marinette growled, "Two are wearing corsets with a blazer. Another is in a mini skirt and if she sits, you can see the garter straps. Another is wearing the same outfit as yesterday and reeks of cigarettes, sweat, nd bad cologne. The last one is wearing last seasons Belmere cocktail dress with tulle bishop sleeves! Thy are sewing a collection and if that sleeve gets caught, we have to destroy that fabric and her sleeves will be ripped off. I am not losing product because someone decided to be stupid this morning, Carol!"
Marinette glared at Damian Wayne, "So, tell me how innapropriate I am or you can fuck off!"
"The clothes you wear demean you and suggest you are welcoming others to join you for a night." Damian stated.
Marinette felt all the rage bubble over and she punched him in the face, sending him across the floor.
"I quit!" she snarled.
Damian looked on as Marinette walked away.
'I won.'
What he didn't expect were the not so hushed whispers of the fashion department.
"I think Mr. Wayne had a crush on her."
"I wish she would seduce me."
"You and me both."
"Apparently, she was very popular in Paris with both genders."
"Wait, what?"
"Really?"
"I heard she dated Jagged Stone's only son."
"Wasn't Adrien Agreste trying to date her?"
"So was Zoe Lee."
"The actress!"
"Mmhmm and she's the second daughter of Style Queen."
"Damn! Why is she here then?"
"She could have gone with one of them and likely inherited a fashion label!"
"Marinette always yells at us when we dress innapropriate."
"Carol."
"I pushed my sleeves up, okay!"
"I think she wrote this years dress code herself."
"I wish that I could see what Mr. Wayne saw."
"Why?"
"Are you kidding me? Stuck up Dupain-Cheng as some sexy thing and not yelling a us? Talk about a perfect fantasy!"
Damian sat there blushing as the employees talked amongst themselves.
'Did no one really see what I saw? They hadn't seen the way her clothes accentuated her? They didn't see the way her body called out to others? Was I the only one who wanted to pin her down to gain control?'
Damian stood up, admitting defeat. Marinette Dupain-Cheng, the person who irked him for months, hadn't been at war with him or seducing him; he liked her. He couldn't tell until the evidence was stacked against him. As the other employees said, she didn't even need to be there. She could marry into money, likely immediately, and run a corporation against them.
'She's not going to get away from me that easily.'
By the time Damian found Marinette, Tim was already on his knees begging her to stay and his father was apologizing about his attitude.
"I can personally guarantee that Damian will be moved departments and you never have to see him again." his own father pleaded.
Tim noticed Damian out of the corner of his eye and stood up.
"You!" Tim shouted, stalking over to his younger brother, "What the hell? Marinette is dressed perfectly fine for her job!"
"Please reconsider, Miss Dupain-Cheng." Bruce spoke.
"I will work from my own home." Mari stated, "I will come to the office only for meetings; everything else will be paper trailed through emails and run by one of you."
"That is perfectly doable." Bruce answered, "We can send any equipment you need and-"
"I have everything already."
Damian looked on confused. He had never known them to suck up this badly, not even to board members.
"You don't even know who she is; do you?" Tim exclaimed.
"An employee by the name of Marinette Dupain-Cheng." Damian answered.
Bruce sighed. Apparently his son had never read her file and background information as to why she was the head of her own department.
"She is Jagged Stone's personal and exclusive designer." Tim snarled, "She designs for many different celebrities world wide. She is known throughout Paris! You can obviously see why we wanted her here."
Damian had no clue that the she was that well known or that his family was that desperate to have her.
"What can we get you to continue to work here?" Bruce questioned, "We can pay you how ever much you want."
"I'll bump your salary to $65,000 a design." Tim offered.
Marinette shook her head, "I only want one thing and I want Damian Wayne to apologize to me."
"80,000 a design!" Tim quickly shouted.
Damian could clearly see his family was horrified. They had zero faith he would apologize or admit his mistake. Damian swallowed his pride and bowed down, as he would to his mother.
"My apologies for making my own personal assumptions." He began, "They were baseless and you truly did nothing wrong. It was my own assumption that you were attempting to seduce me that caused this."
Marinette's cheeks turned red as she listened to his in shock.
"My parents did not conceive me naturally. My mother drugged Father. I was raised and taught by her, from an early age, that women will use any means necessary to seduce who they value as someone of interest; even wear revealing clothes. They will cling to those they desire. They will feign innocence when confronted." Damian continued, "I only observed what I was told, but my family is alos correct. Your clothing is appropriate for the work place. You have never touched me inappropriately. You also have never tried to suede me. You treated me as everyone else in your department and yet-"
Damian was smacked upside the head by Tim. Damian turned to glare at him, but when he looked up, she saw Marinette covering her face with her hands and her ears were bright red.
"Miss Dupain-Cheng?" Damian spoke softly.
Marinette looked between her fingers at him, nervously.
"Miss Duapin-Cheng?" Bruce questioned, cautiously.
"I-I don't understand how-how you can like me." She stammered.
"Well, for one thing, you have a killer right hook." Damian stated.
Out of all the things, he could have answered, that was not one of them. Marinette began laughing and her hands fell away from her blushing face.
The Wayne heir smirked, "I'm also not use to people telling me to 'fuck off'."
Marinette snorted as she thought back to the first day they met. Bruce and Tim nodded as they slowly made their way away from the young adults.
"Everyone back to work." Bruce commanded, "If I see this online, I'll personally make sure whoever posted it, is fired."
The fashion department was quick to get back to work, leaving Damian Wayne to confess to their blushing designer.
TAGLIST: @maribat-calendar-events@animeweebgirl@a-star-with-a-human-name@meme991001@vixen-uchiha@abrx2002@alysrose-starchild@fandom-trapped-03@dood-space@moonlightstar64@saltymiraculer@marveldcedits20@09shell-sea09@icerosecrystal@animegirlweeb@insane-fangirl-of-everything@blueblossombliss@nickristus-dreamer@megawhitleycalderonpaganus@missmadwoman@meira-3919@princessdaisysolosyourfaves@blep-23@fangirlingfanatic@darkhinauniverse@ravenr22@im-a-satanic-ritual@ravennm84@bianca-hooks123@a-slytherinish-gryffindor@starling218
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wild-magic-oops · 9 months
Text
People really be bending backwards in order to defend Larian and the consistent way that Gale is treated worse than other companions. Truly baffling behavior, but I guess that's what happens when people can't extend the same amount of care to characters other than their favs, and think Larian is amazing for doing what should be the bare minimum in the industry actually (but the industry is so shit that people are ready to praise and defend any studio which doesn't try to rob them while spitting in their faces). Not criticizing obvious flaws won't get you a better product next time, and since I'm a petty person - I hope everyone who's telling people it's not a big deal now have the next character they're really into be the one done dirty by both the creators and the fandom.
Another thing I've never seen anyone bring up is how Gale is specifically the only companion whom Durge can kill due to an urge (which is even worded in a way which you can't guess the outcome of). Where's the urge option to kill Astari*n while he attacks you hm? Or that's right, there isn't one. Guess the fuck why. And retaliating while attacked makes a ton more sense, but sense is not smth that Larian bothers with much when it comes to their preferences.
And people choosing to indulge the urge and explaining how it's in character... I bet the majority would be finding loopholes real quick if it was their fav getting killed instead. Double standards is smth that really irks me and they're just so apparent in this fandom, it's exhausting.
Gale is also a companion you can accidentally kill instead of recruit by failing a simple dice roll. That's all it takes.
Both of those instances are smth very much outside of Gale's writer's control, so immediately the bias is showing, how easy it is to kill him.
So please, by all means, keep defending a company against the fans' criticism based on clear observations (which other people have brought up, not specifically what I talked about in this post) which you just don't want to acknowledge, I'm sure that'll work out so nicely for you the moment your preferences stop aligning with theirs.
And if you're a Gale fan who doesn't care and think people are overreacting - you do you, but the way Gale's exploding ending is treated gives really ugly irl implications which can't be ignored. Characters are fictional, but the way certain types are treated speaks of irl biases, and if you can't realize that, I really don't know what to tell you honestly. But aside from all that - professionals shouldn't let their biases show. But they did and continue to do, and that alone is definitely 100% worthy of criticism.
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yanderes-galore · 5 months
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Romantic yandere Geto Suguru concept
I actually enjoyed watching the transition of Geto's characters in Volumes 8 -> 9 so I just had to write for him. For him, my thoughts went from "Oh, I like him!" to "Oh, I'm scared of him!"
In the future, if you want to request him, put if you want Jujutsu Sorcerer! Geto or Curse User! Geto. Then if you want Fake! Geto, you can just say that or "Kenjaku" I guess.
Possible Spoiler Alert For Volumes 8 -> 9 of JJK
Yandere! Suguru Geto Concept
(Jujutsu Sorcerer! Geto and Curse User! Geto)
Pairing: Romantic
Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Manipulation, Overprotective behavior, Possessive behavior, Violence, Genocide mention, Blood, Kidnapping, Degrading behavior, Human pet mention, Murder, Dark themes, Isolation, Forced relationship.
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Okay, I'll say this now...
JS! Geto's darling could be either a non-sorcerer or a Jujutsu Sorcerer like him.
CU! Geto would have a Jujutsu Sorcerer darling or a non-sorcerer pet.
He goes through a drastic change in character I've noticed... and it scares me as it's depicted really well in the manga.
JS! Geto would fully be on board with protecting his darling.
If you aren't someone who sees curses, you're like the one friend he has that isn't in his immediate circle of Jujutsu Sorcerers.
He cares about you, while Gojo mocks him for having a soft spot for a non-sorcerer... Geto doesn't care since he enjoys your company.
Geto also wishes to protect and care for you if you are a fellow Jujutsu Sorcerer.
This is before everything that's happened... before he gained a God Complex and lost his way.
He tries not to use lethal force and has a righteous attitude.
He truly does care about you before he loses his way... but I imagine he isn't quite sure how to confess such feelings.
However, even Gojo can tell Geto is fond of you.
He speaks about you with praise regardless on your relations to curses and that only ever changes after "the incident".
He allows you to talk to him, if you're a non-sorcerer he takes the curses attracted to you off.
He'd do anything for you... he just tries to keep things professional and tries to hide such emotions.
Gojo no doubt jokes about Geto dating you... which causes fights, as expected.
He's not usually a physical yandere regardless of what Geto we're talking about.
He probably tries as a JS, but apologizes in case you react badly.
His tone shifts later, after the change of mind and literal genocide.
He's even more manipulative, violent, egotistical, malicious, and dangerous.
I refer to this Geto as CU! Geto, or Curse User! Geto.
Geto would be overly fond and manipulative towards a Jujutsu Sorcerer/Curse User! Darling.
However, with that same non-sorcerer! Darling as before?
They become a pet.
He hates non-sorcerers by this point.
What irritates him even more is he still has feelings towards you.
No matter how much he tries to deny himself or ignores it, he's still fond towards you.
So he makes you a pet, still a monkey... but you're his.
He feeds off your cursed energy and comes off degrading and condescending.
Geto calls you lucky, perhaps he won't slaughter you like the rest.
You feel like a trophy more than anything.
As a Jujutsu Sorcerer/Curse User, however... Geto is still manipulative yet affectionate.
He more openly admits the feelings he has for you and praises you.
He probably gives you lessons and manipulates you to garner loyalty.
He adores you... hell, even as a pet he likes you to some extent.
You silently miss the old Geto, you liked him before.
This one only scares you... makes you cry...
He isn't Geto in your eyes.
Yet... none of that matters now, does it?
One way or another, Geto will have you completely under his control.
He'll slaughter those around you... parents, relatives, friends... after all, he killed his own parents.
He'll isolate you, kidnap you if he has to...
Geto has embraced his dark desires fully.
Morality doesn't matter anymore.
He'll feed from you, train you, and coat you both in blood to have you...
He isn't Geto anymore, not to you...
He's a monster wearing the face of the one you once cared for.
(Ironic)
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exsanguidus · 1 year
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Controversial opinion; I think Ascended Astarion is the true Astarion. In DnD lore, vampirism amplifies a person's traits for whoever they are at the time they become a true vampire. A Paladin wanting to save people will end up ruling a city with an iron fist to keep people safe. A mage wanting to heal those they love will hurt everyone else to heal them. Astarion was on a journey with Tav - one from being controlled, owned, and tortured to being free, curious, and even powerful. Becoming a full vampire and ascending just amplified that. It forced a self-actualization, not a descent into villainy. I think Ascended Astarion is cannon Astarion. He will always be a vampire, and vampires in DnD are always the amplification of a true self. Without ascention, he is still malleable - but I don't think its what he wants. He wants to be powerful (protected by his own power too - his power being a means to self-preservation), he wants to be loved, seen, and free. Free of hunger, free to walk in the sun, free of Cazador. All these things are true regardless of the path you choose. But, they are all only attainable through ascension. When you ascend Astarion - he gets everything he wants and becomes who he truly is.
I'm going to start this with a disclaimer:
I work in the mental health field professionally and majored in Social & Behavioral Science, which is partly why I felt drawn to Astarion as a sort of case study. Characters rooted in trauma are interesting to me and I enjoy picking them apart to judge how real it feels. I utilize my educational and professional background to essentially guide how I write Astarion on this account.
That said, despite me being a professional in the field, all of what I have to say is my personal opinion and interpretation of Astarion's character based on how I interpret the material Larian gave us and the material that can be found in DND lore. Even in real life, things have variation and not all mental health struggles (getting over trauma is part of mental health) present the exact same way. There are theories that exist to try and explain some trends in mental health studies, psychology, and sociology, but again they're called theories for a reason.
Now, my response to this question will be under the cut and will include spoilers.
I know what lore in particular you're referencing, anon, because I've been going back to it a lot ever since I opened this account.
Astarion very much has an insecure attachment style born from his abuse at Cazador's hands. Specifically, an anxious-avoidant attachment type that leans more towards avoidant when he's first met and then begins to swing more towards anxious as he begins to get closer to Tav and the other companions.
Anxious-avoidant attachment types (also known as the “fearful or disorganized type”) bring together the worst of both worlds. Anxious-avoidants are not only afraid of intimacy and commitment, but they distrust and lash out emotionally at anyone who tries to get close to them. Anxious-avoidants often spend much of their time alone and miserable, or in abusive or dysfunctional relationships. Anxious-avoidants are low in confidence and less likely to express emotions, preferring to suppress them. However, they can have intense emotional outbursts when under stress. They also don’t tend to seek help when in need due to a distrust of others. This sucks because they are also incapable of sorting through their own issues. Anxious-avoidants really get the worst of both worlds. They avoid intimacy not because they prefer to be alone like avoidants. Rather, they avoid intimacy because they are so terrified of its potential to hurt them (Mark Manson, Attachment Styles and How They Affect Your Relationships).
Typically, most studies of Attachment Theory focus on the relationship of parents-children or romantic partners, but it can also be applied to any significant relationship someone has in their lifetime. Attachment styles thus are capable of changing based on new relationship experiences.
If you end up giving him the "good" ending where he denies the Ascension, it's implied in his final dialogue that he's actively working towards having a secure attachment type due to the influences of his fellow worm-afflicted associates - particularly Tav.
I think that it's important to also note that, even if Tav doesn't romantically connect with Astarion, he shows hints of desperately wanting someone to care for him, support him, and love him. He does want to know what sex would be like as something other than a tool, and especially what it would be like to actually want to have it just for the pure sake of enjoying having it.
You have to understand that Astarion doesn't even understand the concept of casual sex or friends with benefits. All those times he had to seduce people for Cazador was not casual sex or a friends with benefits situation. All of them were transactions with a means to an end. He got nothing out of seducing those victims besides the possibility of not incurring Cazador's wrath that night - but even then, there was still a possibility because Cazador was an abuser.
Abusers are incapable of providing genuine safety, but can manipulate their victims into believing an illusion of safety. Often times, they manipulate their victims into this by using phrases like "you made me do this by being disobedient", "it wouldn't come to this if you just did what you were told", and then weaponizing basic needs such as shelter, food, and social interaction. The bare minimum becomes something the victim is expected to be grateful for and viewed as a favor, which means anything beyond the bare minimum is expected to be viewed as a theatrical showing of care and love.
In game, Tav has the chance to hear Astarion tell the story of how Cazador turned him. He basically states that he got attacked by a mob due to a ruling he handed down when he was magistrate and then Cazador saved him and offered him immortality. It can be inferred that in his pre-vampiric days, Astarion had no idea that Cazador was abusive to his spawn.
This is likely because it seems that Cazador is careful about his public image. He doesn't allow his spawn to drink from humans, very likely not just as a means to further oppress them and dampen their potential power they could get from drinking people's blood, but also as a way to ensure there's not just a bunch of people out in the city being bitten and left alive to tell the story - or left dead on the street suspiciously.
He has his spawn seduce and lure people, particularly lower class people that would be harder for general society to realize is missing or just that he knows people who could actually challenge him wouldn't care for (you learn that reading some of the books and notes in Szarr Palace). The only exception to this is the kidnapping of Gur children, but even then it seems to fit his MO as it seems Gur are considered somewhat outcasts from the rest of Baldurian society due to their cultural differences.
It should also be noted that he himself doesn't do these seductions or kidnappings. He specifically chooses spawn to be his lackeys and that's likely so, if shit hits the fan and the spawn gets caught, he has deniability since he wasn't there. It's methodical and thought out to keep as many eyes away from him so he can still obtain what he wants and keep sailing under the radar.
Cazador is this methodical and purposeful as a result of his own trauma, which we learn about from the skull of his master in the dungeon of Szaar Palace. There's one interaction in particular with the skull in which Tav can learn that, at one point, Cazador attempted to rebel and usurp his master. Cazador failed and his master punished him via impalement. Not because Cazador had the audacity to try and usurp him, but because Cazador tried and failed. Cazador's master punished Cazador via torture because his master was disgusted by the fact that his spawn was too weak to succeed in such a plot.
Which brings me to my next point... it's not uncommon for victims of abuse to later become abusers. Hence the term Cycle of Abuse exists. Many abusers who were once victims often have the mentality of either "I'm not nearly as bad as my abuser was, they should be grateful I care enough to not be so bad" or "I survived and it made me tougher, they need to suck it up and let it help them build character" or both. They often fail to view their abuse as abuse and fail to recognize how their experience as abuse victims contributes into making them toxic and abusive to others.
There's many peer-reviewed scholarly articles you can find about the cycle of abuse, but one I particularly find useful is Editorial: Dissociation, and cycles of abuse across generations by David P.H. Jones. It talks specifically about parents and children, but I believe some of the general points made can be applied to Cazador and his spawn, as he crafts a very family-like setting that can be seen in the way that his spawn refer to one another as brothers and sisters.
This would thus make him the father figure, a role exponentially made important by the fact he denies his spawn education on things that could serve to give them ideas or the ability to leave him (for example, Astarion mentions that none of the spawn were permitted to learn about the language of the various symbols around the palace) and he consistently chooses his Golden Children (Favored Spawns) as a means of providing more false security. Do what he says, when he says, exactly how he says and don't complain then you will have benefits. You will be Favored, and to have his favor is the highest honor you could achieve.
Torture is clearly presented as Cazador's primary go-to for discipline. Research has also concluded that trauma has a way of affecting the brain and memories.
Trauma can prevent information (like words, images, sounds, etc.) from different parts of the brain from combining to make a semantic memory. The temporal lobe and inferior parietal cortex collect information from different brain areas to create semantic memory (The National Institute for the Clinical Application of Behavioral Medicine).
Astarion mentions a few times in-game that he can barely remember his life before Cazador, if at all, and a huge part of that is likely because of all the trauma Cazador inflicted upon him that exacerbated the natural occurrence of memory loss from aging (if vampires experience natural memory loss from aging, that is). This is most likely true for all of Cazador's spawn.
I say all this as a set up to truly answering you, anon, specifically where you say: "from being controlled, owned, and tortured to being free, curious, and even powerful. Becoming a full vampire and ascending just amplified that. It forced a self-actualization, not a descent into villainy."
I can argue that Astarion did not feel free up until after a decision to Ascend or not was made. And I argue that stance due to some dialogue he can have with Tav here he basically states that the power Ascension could guarantee that no one, even someone after Cazador is dead, could ever come in to oppress and hurt him again. Even with Cazador dead, he has such an intense fear of being enslaved and used that he turns to catastrophic thoughts as justification to why he needs to Ascend.
Catastrophic thinking is a cognitive distortion that occurs when people have a hard time weighing the likelihood of certain outcomes and believe that terrible or catastrophic outcomes—which are highly unlikely—become, in one’s mind, salient and extremely likely. (Tom Zaubler, MD, MPH).
Aside from the Gur, whom Astarion can manage to evade and even kill perfectly fine as just a spawn, we're not presented with any hints of another big bad in the vampire world that could possibly want Astarion. As such, there's not really any tangible threat, but rather a perceived threat that he believes is destined to darken his doorstep at any time.
His catastrophic thinking is a trauma response. His belief that he needs to be the most powerful being in the room as a way to be truly free is a trauma response. Cazador broke him down emotionally, mentally, physically, and sexually to make him believe that he was weak and trapped. Furthermore, that he remained trapped because he was too weak to do anything about it.
You see how this goes full circle into how Cazador's master punished Cazador for not being able to successfully usurp him? It places blame on the victim, allowing shame and helplessness to root that the abuser can manipulate. We know that Astarion definitely feels shame because he tells Tav that. For most of his dialogue until the boss fight, he's constantly bringing up that he did what Cazador wanted and acted obedient because he had no choice.
This is true, he had to act in self-preservation to survive and unfortunately that meant he had to be subservient. A few dialogue choices you can have your Tav pick can challenge Astarion and say he could have still tried, to which he'll rightfully tell Tav that Tav has no right to judge him for the choices he made to survive.
When Astarion encounters Sebastian in the dungeon, its made pretty obvious how much guilt and shame he truly feels. Furthermore, that for all Astarion's protesting and exclaiming that no one has the right to judge him, a part of him did believe that he didn't do enough to try and escape enslavement. A part of himself blamed himself and believed he allowed himself to be abused when, in reality, he was put in a horrible situation with very limited options. He did the best he could in the moment, with what information he had in those moments.
I also want to argue that who Astarion is when we meet him isn't his true self. It's who he had to become in order to survive Cazador. Astarion doesn't even know who his true self is because he didn't have the opportunity to explore his own likes and preferences. Cazador molded all of his spawn because he had a specific purpose for them.
Not only that, but since Cazador would have to more directly deal with these spawn since he used them as lackies, he also would have molded them to behave in ways to his preference so that he wouldn't find their presence unbearable and feel inclined to murder them out of annoyance. This is also where the Favored Spawn being separated and set on a pedestal comes into play. Those who could please him and play to his wants and needs had better benefits. If all of the spawn are acting in self-preservation, they would want to be favored and thus would want to adapt themselves to things Cazador liked and approved of.
This would mean learning to be cruel to those less fortunate and not doing anything as charity. This is the reason why Astarion approves of some questionable decisions Tav can make. Astarion learned his ideals and morality from Cazador because he had to so he could know how to please Cazador and stay in his master's good graces. After a while, even if you started off disagreeing, forcing yourself to act a certain way can become a habit that sticks with you. You convince yourself to enjoy it too so it's easier to swallow.
Astarion craves power because he knows that power is the quickest, easiest, and - what he believes - most effective way to prevent him from having to use that method ever again. It's logical to want power to solve that.
You said in your ask: "He wants to be powerful (protected by his own power too - his power being a means to self-preservation), he wants to be loved, seen, and free. Free of hunger, free to walk in the sun, free of Cazador. All these things are true regardless of the path you choose. But, they are all only attainable through ascension. When you ascend Astarion - he gets everything he wants and becomes who he truly is."
In the most literal of terms, yes, Ascension gives him all of those. However, since the basis of him believing he needs power to be free is rooted in fear, that's not actually really freedom. That is still his fear ruling over him.
There's a stark difference in what someone wants versus what they need. He wants power, to be seen, to be loved, and to be free. What he actually needs is security, stability, support, consistency, empathy, and autonomy. The things he wants is what he believes will solve the empty cups of what he needs, and he believes that because the only example he had on how to act to get what you want - until the events of the game - was Cazador. He literally had no other example of how to get your needs met except through selfishness, cruelty, force, manipulation, and abuse.
Again, I reiterate. The Astarion we first meet is not Astarion's true nature. Astarion's true nature was corrupted by his abuse from Cazador and the subsequent trauma that followed. If it had been his true nature, he would have happily been Cazador's subject because their true natures would have been in alignment.
It only becomes his true nature if he allows that trauma to define him and decides that he needs to embrace it rather than fight it. That is then what gets amplified because that fear that roots those wants becomes amplified.
Honestly, it's impossible to say what would be canon for Astarion because there's too many factors.
Studies have shown that having more supportive and positive influences, even if its later in life after leaving the abuser, tends to work in favor of the victim breaking the cycle of abuse. As such, I think that if you make a Tav who's core values are autonomy, consent, second chances, and redemption and somehow manage to get high enough approval that he'd even consider caring what they think; then its more likely that Astarion would reject Ascension due to observing how much softer, kinder, patient, and merciful Tav is.
But if its a Tav that has no interest in getting to know him beyond the surface or Tav doesn't exist at all, I honestly think he would end up going through with Ascension. Mostly because, to me, it seems like he didn't really bother to have more than surface level interactions with the other companions and the other companions really only ended up getting to know him better as a result to Tav managing to get past his masking. He does not lower his mask on his own accord, only after certain things are done and said by Tav.
Unfortunately, I just don't really think any of the other companions you can pick up in-game would really be able to provide support and determined consistency in the same way that players can make Tav. Hence I don't think he'd end up caring enough about any of them to ever start to think that perhaps freedom can be defined differently than the way he initially believes, and would view Ascension as the only right way to get his needs fulfilled.
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doberbutts · 7 months
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Any chance you could talk about how you're teaching Fenris to retrieve? I am also struggling so hard with that. Will probably consult with a real life professional trainer about it in the near future because it is just. So. Frustrating. Lol, but I'd love to hear what worked for you.
Recent picture of my retrieval-hating doggo for tax, lol.
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Well I don't know that I'm the best person to take advice from because retrieves are absolutely one of the hardest tasks for me to wrap my brain around, especially formal sport retrieves, and despite me trying to teach retrieves to *checks notes* EIGHT different dogs, Fenris is my first one to actually have some mild success.
I spoke at length to my friend Allie @molosseraptor about how much I suck at retrieves and she had some amazing advice for me. I cannot stress enough how good of a dog trainer she is. Any time I have asked her for advice, she not only has hit the nail directly on the head, but it has widened my understanding of whatever concept I'm struggling with that much more. Truly, if you want actual help, don't listen to me. Just go pay Allie to teach you!
Anyway. For Fenris specifically, retrieve is a behavior chain. In other words, I teach each piece of a retrieve separately, and then let it all come together at the end after he nails every piece the way I want him to. In other words, I taught a sit, a come to front, the concept of going to what I throw and picking it up, the concept of bringing it back, the concept of holding something in his mouth without chewing or dropping it, the concept of the hot/cold game, the concept of a clicker, the concept of working for treats, paw targets, and outs... before ever showing him a dumbbell.
From there it's a matter of string it together. Go get the thing > pick it up without chewing > bring it back > come to sit at front with it in your mouth > hold onto it until I tell you to out. The paw targets help show him where I want him to be. The hot/cold game tells him if I need him to tweak his positioning.
Historically I have been able to get a "go get the thing and bring it back to me and sit at front" however in nearly all of the dogs I have tried to teach this behavior chain, including Fenris, we get stuck in the sit at front portion because the dog spits the fucking dumbbell out and drops it on my toes as it sits down. Which is very not what I want and also these are weighted dumbbells ouch my poor feets.
I brought this up at Mondio last time we were there and the training director and the president both suggested instead of teaching him a chin rest (which I have never been able to do very successfully with the dog uprifht) to teach him to push slightly into me as he sits, lifting his head up to do so (and thus reducing temptation for him to drop the damn thing) and making that front nice and tight. He may bump me and we may lose a point, but I can tweak that part later. This was an almost instantaneous breakthrough and I am really glad those women are counted among my friends.
One last thing I want to mention is that, knowing he was going to be a mondio dog, I did not correct him at all for picking up various things around the house. In Mondio, the retrieve can be anything, not just a weighted dumbbell. So that means that because I didn't want him to be weird about picking stuff that Is Not Toys up, I never once told him off for picking things up. Usually he just wanders around with it in his mouth, and because he never associated this with a bad thing, he usually comes right up to me and spits it into my hand.
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merakiui · 6 days
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AHHHHHH I LOVED THE RIDO FIC SO MUCH!!!
Well in my interpretation, the both of them were copying each other— in Riddle's case unknowingly and I just love the idea that there were implications of Tako, sleazy and disgusting Tako doing Riddle's favorite professor— dare I say his professor, yet nothing was confirmed except for the part where professor was late.
It could be Riddle reading too much on the appearance of the professor that he became so delulu!!! I'm not sure if I didn't understand the fic much (I apologize to you and to my fellow readers, English is my 4th language aside from my birth language huhuhu) but I really liked that you didn't exactly confirm and just gave subtle signs that are up to us if there were something going on or if we were adapting Riddle's pov in the matter, with him thinking to much and became paranoid ever since Tako came unto the picture.
BUT BUT it got me thinking, since Riddle is a goodie two shoes who's a nice and talented young individual. I wonder what his preference really is?
If given the chance will Riddle like the same girl who follows the rules and obedient—perfectly made for him or or would he choose the student who's the exact opposite of who he hoped to have as his own, someone who disregards the rules and instead does whatever she wants?
Back to the fic!! I'm sorry if the structure of this ask is too much, when I ramble too much I forget how to write coherently huhuhu, I love the line where Riddle said that Tako would be the one who'd destroy the professors life but he stated that Riddle would be the one who'd do both. And that's exactly what happened! The part where Riddle finally had enough and thought that Azul was smiling before he died.. I wonder if the sleazy Tako wanted that to happen? He set up the trap where he'd let Riddle's mind destroy himself and the thought that if Azul couldn't have the professor (if professor really was professional and had a strict student-teacher relationship) then Riddle absolutely can't have what Azul couldn't have?
YOU CAN'T TELL ME THAT ITALIAN AZUL ISN'T IN THE MAFIA!!
Love lots to you Mera!! I love all your fics and rambles of twist! It has me foaming in the mouth and I want to inject it into my every being. (⁠◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍⁠)⁠❤
(>ω<)♡ THANK YOU SO SO SOOOOO MUCH OMG!!!!! Gently cradling your words and this ask!!!! It means so much. <3 I'm so happy you enjoyed the story and various aspects of it!! I loved writing about Riddle and Azul copying each other. It happens so suddenly that it's difficult to determine which one of them started it, but it's still jarring all the same from Riddle's pov.
And you're correct!!! I decided to leave the relationship between Azul and Reader ambiguous so that readers could theorize whether Riddle's paranoia has any credit or not. He seems like such a reliable narrator in the beginning, but when his obsession gets the better of him and those slivers of doubt and copycat behaviors worm their way in then his own sensible narration loses its veracity.
I'm so glad you liked the line about Riddle ruining both Azul and Reader's lives!!!! I felt like this >:) when I wrote it. Azul knows what he's doing, but he's going to continue being a cockroach rat about it because that's just how he is!!! Truly a troublesome tako... >_< and look what it got him: blunt force trauma. ;;; although Azul was probably prepared for the worst when he stepped into Riddle's room. In my heart, there's a sequel to this fic where it's revealed Azul was indeed practicing Riddle's handwriting to frame him for things he didn't do so the gravity of his crime seems even more severe and premeditated even though it was mostly a crime of passion. If tako's going down, Riddle is coming with him.
Italian mafia Azul....... 👁 👁 oh, he would be so terrible. One day I'll write a fic with mafia boss Azul x spy reader hehehehe.
I think Riddle's ideal girl changes with his character development. If it's keeping with twst canon, then pre-overblot he drools over the demure sweetheart from his hometown who his mother sets him up with because she approves of you and your demeanor. You follow the rules, you listen to authority, you're conditioned to be the perfect wife, etc. After his overblot and once he learns to be more lenient with himself and others, he'd enjoy a more outgoing, rebellious sort of girl. Or maybe he's always secretly admired that type but has only ever scoffed and turned his nose up at you because of your behavior. But now that Riddle's healing and doing all sorts of things behind his mother's back while he's away at NRC (and has the freedom to do so) maybe that type grows on him more than he realized it would.
( ꈍ◡ꈍ) hehe Riddle is so precious. Thank you again for enjoying my work, lovely anon!!!! Sending you all the love and joy and many sweet treats~~
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khaire-traveler · 11 months
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Deities to help with gender dysphoria?
Hey there! I'm currently on an Internet break, but seeing as how I recently reblogged something related to being trans (particularly about hateful blogs that are vile in every conceivable way), I figured I'd answer this ask now rather than later to hopefully help others out as well.
In truth, I feel that you should be able to feel comfortable turning to any of the gods you worship for these things, but that's mostly because I strongly value comfort and safety within spirituality. The gods that I have personal experience with, however, and that I've heard are the most helpful with these issues would be as follows (I'll make a list):
***PLEASE KEEP IN MIND THAT THIS IS MOSTLY UPG AND MY PERSONAL EXPERIENCES WITH THESE GODS***
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Hellenic Pantheon
• Dionysus - one of his epithets is literally Androgynos (androgynous) to comment on how he breaks the gender binary and defies expectations (as well as to emphasize that he is very beautiful, but that's more of a historical/cultural thing for the ancient Greeks); he has been one of the most helpful deities when it comes to my transition, and I've always felt extremely comfortable opening up to him about my personal problems and feelings that I wouldn't tell anyone else; he will always listen to you, and there is an air of understanding that I don't always feel with other gods; he really helps you feel at-home in your own skin and will encourage you to dress and act in ways that make you feel happy, comfortable, and safe; something that I seriously love about him is that you will always feel loved when you confide him, and he will go out of his way to remind you that Dionysus stands for the outcasts, for those who people look down on for defying the strict "rules of society"; he will always support you in your endeavor to be and embrace yourself and be right be your side, no matter who stands against you
• Athena - they don't have any epithets relating to this, but based on personal experience, Athena has always been extremely encouraging and supportive throughout my transition; they instill confidence in oneself and are great at helping you feel secure in your transition (like, getting rid of self-doubt regarding gender identity and such, but they're also great at helping you discover what feels right to you if you're unsure); they are also great at helping you identify what triggers your dysphoria and any behaviors/thoughts that you have that may contribute to the feeling; if you struggle with how others view you, Athena is great at encouraging you to focus more on how you perceive yourself and learning how to not take the words of others to heart
• Hermes - I cannot stress enough how extremely supportive and compassionate he has always been; I've heard from many other trans worshippers as well that Hermes is extremely good to interact with when they're having a moment of dysphoria or doubt; he will reassure you, and every single time, I swear he knows exactly what to say to make you feel better, especially if you're having negative thoughts about yourself; he is seriously the best hype man out there as well, if you're ever in need of someone who will boost you up; he will always encourage you to trust your own judgement and will insist that only you know what's truly best for yourself
• Apollo - He tends to be very effeminate in the way that he presents himself, even in ancient Greek culture, and for a lot of people, they find comfort in this; he is extremely supportive during transitions, and I've heard from many worshippers that he will challenge a lot of your negative beliefs about yourself directly; he is the type of god I would suggest if you're looking to work through these dysphoric feelings and, hopefully, get rid of them ultimately; the hard work of that can be extremely intense, I will not lie, and I honestly recommend seeking professional support alongside the support that Apollo can provide you with to ensure that you have all the help you need throughout this process; aside from that, Apollo is a wonderful guide throughout the often scary process that is finding and learning to love yourself; he will never leave you high and dry, and will support you for as long as you desire his support
• Artemis - As a literal goddess of transition, Artemis is fantastic for navigating through the various trials and changes of being trans, whether that be physically or emotionally; similar to Apollo, she defies gender expectations by often presenting herself in a very masculine way which can be a comfort to many people; despite what I often see online Artemis can actually be extremely soothing and comforting, providing you reassurance when you need it the most; she is fantastic for grounding yourself and finding inner stability; I find her to be very passionate and determined, but if you need a calm energy, she's very good at adjusting to whatever you need in the moment; she will encourage you to be yourself without shame as well as help you not care what others think/how others perceive you
• Aphrodite - being the goddess of love, she is AMAZING if self-love is something you specifically struggle with; in ancient Greece, there have also been depictions of her with a penis, so many worshippers believe her to be trans herself; she has been a massive assist for me in learning to love and embrace myself and my gender identity, and something she's been especially helpful with is accepting my physical body the way that it is, to a certain extent; she is extremely gentle, compassionate, and encouraging, and her inviting energy makes it easy to open up to her about how you're feeling; if you tell her you have a problem you'd like to work on, she gets on it immediately, and I personally noticed her presence a lot more in my life even just days after requesting her help
Norse Pantheon
• Loki - This may be a somewhat obvious entry, but Loki is insanely helpful when it comes to anything related to gender identity and self-acceptance; being a shapeshifter, Loki is not bound by the constraints of gender and has even been shown to have a lot of gender fuckery within mythos; Loki helped me come to realize that I identify as non-binary masc rather than fully male; Loki also helped me embrace the more uncommon factors of my gender, as I personally like to go by fae/faer when I can; I haven't gone to Loki much for my dysphoria, but based on what I've heard many worshippers say over and over again, they are a miracle-worker when it comes to anything gender-related
• Freyja - I don't personally have much experience with her, but seeing what worshippers of her say, I felt she was important to mention; similarly to Aphrodite, she has a domain in love and that includes self-love; she is amazing at embracing yourself for everything you are, and I've been told she's especially good at help with physical dysphoria; she seems to be very kind and loving but definitely has a fiery passion to her that cannot be mistaken; if that energy might be too intense for you, I'd imagine it's not an issue to ask her to come across with a gentler energy
• Freyr - From what I've been told, he has a very fatherly and gentle presence which can provide great support throughout your transition; he is wonderful at grounding and replenishing energy; when you need someone to reassure you that everything will be ok, Freyr is a wonderful god to go to; he will make you feel accepted and loved exactly the way you are which is how you deserve to feel
• Odin - I don't personally worship Odin, but I've been told he's a great ally to have when exploring gender; similarly to Loki, he is a shapeshifter; he is very supportive of transfolk, and I've heard that worshipper find a lot of solace in him during difficult times; he is a great advisor as well, and if you are willing, he can help you work on understanding your triggers and learning to cope with them; he's definitely really good with the self-reflection aspect of coping with dysphoria
• Thor - Again, I don't personally worship Thor, but I've been told he's fantastic at he's really helpful with self-confidence and self-assurance; he's great at providing you with stability as well and can be a rock-solid support during the most difficult times; if you're looking for a deity who will ground and support you, I would highly recommend Thor
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Since I don't worship many Norse deities, most of my information was from @broomsick who is a very knowledgeable and experienced Norse pagan! I recommend checking out their content, if Norse paganism interests you. I wanted to include the Norse pantheon, though, to leave the option open.
To my followers, please feel welcome to add your own experiences and thoughts/opinions! 🧡
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I hope this answered your question and gave you some good options! Best of luck to you as you embark on your journey. ☺️
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