#mistaken for human

[aziraphales-library]

Hello!!! I'm looking for fics that are coffee shop AUs, florist AUs, and tropes along the lines of that; except, instead of them being humans, they're still beings from heaven / hell

If there aren't any like that, that's fine. Thank you very much!! <3

Hi. Here are some non-human au coffee shop and florist fics...

heraldry, and other omens by starklystar (G)

Two days ago, the shop was called SLICE OF HEAVEN, in bold, yellow neon letters above the window’s tartan awning. Yesterday morning, the letters had read out ARSE OF HEAVEN, but by evening, residents reported it had changed to a more subdued BAKED BADS. It shouldn’t be possible to change neon signs so quickly, but today, upon entry, the bakery had been called DEVIL’S ADVOCAKES. ---------------- Or, there’s a new bakery in the South Downs area, that’s also maybe a flowershop, a coffeeshop, and an animal clinic. There's a chocolate scone that costs six thousand pounds. For orders, kindly contact ajcrngkwhoooe@myspace.com.

Safety in Falsehood by enjolras_lexa (T)

The florist!Crowley AU no one asked for and everybody probably already wrote. Aziraphale’s bookshop burned down and now he needs a new cover job, ends up being hired by Crowley. Neither of them knows the other isn’t human. Cue romance.

Blue Roses by NotEvenCloseToStraight (G)

Hell’s Bells Botanicals was the most successful flower shop in all of London and in no way could that success be attributed to excellent customer service or the owner being the sort of chap who was friends with everyone. In fact, Hell’s Bells Botanicals was the most successful flower shop in all of London DESPITE having the worst customer service imaginable and an owner that obviously enjoyed making every moment in his shop as unpleasant as possible. Anthony J Crowley was surly and ill mannered, impatient with potential customers and downright aggravating with repeat customers, and underwent transactions as if it irked him to his very soul to sell the plants he raised. Hell’s Bells Botanicals was the best, its owner quite literally the worst, and seeing as how Crowley had been around since the dawn of time and had seen any and everything the world had to offer, he didn’t see anything about his attitude changing anytime soon. But then the empty bookshop across the way was purchased by a blonde man in an old fashioned sort of suit jacket, and life as Crowley knew it changed quite a bit.

What the mind forgets the heart remembers by IggysBunny (T)

The apocalypse did NOT happen. It was not supposed to NOT happen, as far as Gabriel and Beelzebub were concerned. Since their first attempt to punish their respective Earthly representatives (read: get revenge) didn’t work out, they decided to go bigger. Obviously, the best way to do that was to split the two. Aziraphale and Crowley would not remember who they are, lose their powers, become human. A patisserie and a flower shop would be involved. Of course, the plan was rather big, they needed the approval of God herself. Well, The Almighty agreed to it, under one important condition- in case the (now both) former angels fell for each other, everything would be back to normal. Naturally a demon in nature would never love an angel, and vice versa. Right? 

I'll Be Seeing You by Magnolia822 (E)

Mr. Zachariah Fell, purveyor of fine candies and ice cream, lives a comfortable life in spite of his hazy memories and troubling dreams. When a red-haired, handsome, and oddly familiar stranger takes over the shop across the street, Zachariah is forced to confront the possibility that he might not be the man he thought he was. In fact, he might not even be human at all.

Big Cup of Espresso by justsimplymeagain (M)

It turns out - when you lose your memories you can find yourself in a job position unlike anything before. Too bad it didn't stay simple as old faces got involved.

- Mod D

[mossycobblestonewrites]

DC X DP PROMPT #8

Danny is a Justice League member as Phantom. They know about ghosts and stuff, as Danny has taught them things.

Danny, Dani, and Dan are all relatively grown. In their human forms (Dan inhabits a clone body) they all look VERY similar. The Ghost forms of the D's don't exactly look the same, per se, but they do look very similar and it's not because they are all technically clones (though that helps)

There are more than a few days where Danny doesn't want to do JL stuff, and he figures, the JL know about his operations outside the JL, they should know about his siblings, right? Right? Wrong.

Dan, Danny, and Dani constantly swap out for JL activities and no one has noticed. They all think either A. Danny is gender fluid, B. Danny has mood swing and or multiple personalities, or C. Nothing is wrong, what are you guys talking about everyone has their off days!

The Dannies find out and OBVIOUSLY have to make a game out of it because I mean - how does the JUSTICE LEAGUE of all people not notice the difference between THREE DIFFERENT PEOPLE

[superbat-love]

Angry supervillain: Imbeciles! Because of your incompetence, the Justice League has been alerted to our presence!

Assassin 1: My lord, we accept full responsibility for the failure of our mission.

Angry supervillain: I don’t know why I hired you fools! Your orders were to capture the alien and kill the human before sunrise. Why the hell did you throw the kryptonite net at the human and gun down the alien?

Assassin 2: My lord, in our defence, we were not expecting both of them to stumble out of the closet undressed in the middle of the night. The first man saw us, kept apologizing and tried to cover himself up. The second man simply stared at us and remarked “How interesting”. So we had to make a split-second decision regarding their identities. We deeply apologize for the mix-up my lord.

[moonlight-stalker]

# Dc x Dp 131 Halloween prompt

Every Halloween Fright Knight would lead the dead to the living world and at the end of the night he would collect any that were stuck in the living world

He has not been able to do this for several centuries because he had to guard Pariah Dark's sarcophagus but now that there is a new king he can get back to his original purpose which is guiding Souls and other creatures to the realms Zone.

When he gets back King Phantom tells him he seems to have made a few mistakes he did not realize how rusty he has become.

What Fright Night thought he brought back

8 ghost 1 of which is very sick

4 zombies

3 were animals

A false immortal

A spirit of fear

A child of Undergrowth

What he actually brought back

Calendar man - a man that does crime on holidays and significant date

Clayface - a human that can shape-shift

Firefly - a person who likes arson

Mr. Freeze - a man who is trying to find a cure for his wife ( Danny needs to get him to talk to Frostbite before he leaves )

Red Hood - not a full ghost but a halfa that's sick ( also needs to see Frostbite )

Robin - a very stabby human

The Joker - insane

The Mad Hatter - a man who is obsessed with Alice in Wonderland

Lord Death Man - a man who plays dead very convincingly

Solomon Grundy - actually a zombie

Two-Face - a person who has had a very bad injure

Tim Drake - a sleep-deprived human that is only alive because of coffee and spite ( get Nocturn to put the human to sleep for a couple of hours )

Killer Croc - a metahuman

Killer Moth - a man dressed as a moth

Man-Bat - is in fact a were animal

Ra's al Ghul - false immortal

The Scarecrow - a human that likes to spread fear ( Fright Night had known that he was human he was just maker sure that Scarecrow got the message that he isn't the master of Halloween )

Poison Ivy - is not a child of Undergrowth yet

[bitethedustfools]

TWST Story Idea (11)

Yuu= He/Him cuz its people pov

The coffin did not contain a single person but instead two people, stuffed in together uncomfortably: a boy and a girl whose appearances mirrored each other as expected of twins.

Crowley did not know this when he first declared Grim and one of the twins to be two in one package students because one wandered off when this happened. Once united, the twins realized that if they admitted there was a third person, it would either be the other twin or Grim, who might not be able to go to NRC.

They had made the decision to fool everyone that there were only two beings instead of three living in the ramshackle dorm, just so that no one could separate them.

The twins became one person, exchanging places every day and making sure they detailed their day down to the specifics in case someone asked them.

Since they had different genders and personalities, naturally, their behavior didn't match up, so they tried to create another persona mixing some of their characteristics instead of creating a new one, which would be hard to play the role.

The way they moved was easy to mimic because they were twins who had done everything together, but sometimes it was easy to forget who they were supposed to be, leading to the image falling apart. So, the persona must have a certain gait made from a mix of them.

The same goes for the rest of their characteristics. They took the differences between them and mixed them into one. The soft-spoken girl and the hot-tempered boy became a person who was well-mannered but wouldn't be afraid to retaliate. The brain and the brawn combined to be a competent person.

This person was Yuu, a persona which the twins must become so that their secrets are safe.

It was hard to maintain this persona, but the twins got to rest some days when it wasn't their turn, and the paperwork dropped by Crowley was done much faster with two people. In addition, one could even go to school while the other did some errands outside of school. This meant easy money stockpile, although it dwindled slightly since there were three living beings now.

They were certain that their secret was safe, even though some had cast suspicious looks at them, but no one had ever spoken out loud about it, so that was fine.

However, being seen as something not entirely human did not crossed their minds.

-

Everyone thought Yuu was strange. Almost all who paid more attention would notice that there was something wrong with him.

Yuu's voice couldn't stay the same tone. It changed frequently and subtly. It would be low and high-pitched, like a normal male voice trying to sound a bit like a woman, and another would resemble a young boy trying to imitate a man's voice by deepening it.

They thought Yuu was messing with them or it was just his way of talking. Not that they fully believed it, but it was better to ignore things, you know?

Often, Yuu spoke politely, and then the next moment, he would send a glare or speak with a hardened tone to someone who managed to offend him in some way. People didn't really get scared at that, seeing as it was just a mild scolding.

Another day, he would do the same, but it was different. This one seemed forced when speaking softly, yet when he was mad, that's when it was the most genuine, and it scared most people.

Someone once caught Yuu looking at a mirror and practicing his expression.

The said person thought it was funny until Yuu said, "My facial muscles are too stiff. I can't get it right."

They all thought Yuu was similar to Floyd, but clearly, this was a different case.

And not to mention, Yuu's movements seemed calculated, as though he was scared of making a mistake. Sometimes they were too stiff, and other times there were too many sways or the steps were irregular, and so on. Some noticed that Yuu's eyes widened slightly before assuming a certain gait that the others had seen plenty of times.

"I almost forgot how to do this…" his murmurs could still be heard, and it made everyone break into cold sweats rapidly.

Some beastmen thought they smelled the scent of a female on Yuu, but the next day it was male. It was different every day, and sometimes it happened in a row. He confronted Yuu one day and was met with a blank face, and then a rather tight smile.

He did not get an answer, but the next few days, the scent of a male on Yuu continued, and Yuu's gaze bore into his soul with a vicious glare.

His mind had come to a conclusion that Yuu was not human.

Some say they witnessed Yuu's doppelganger in some random place before stumbling upon another Yuu, which frightened most people because Yuu denied having seen them, and he had an alibi with Grim.

Yuu's friends, the first-years, thought that Yuu and the ramshackle dorm were weird and creepy. Often, they would hear Yuu talking to himself or loud noises coming from a different room or sudden shuffling when they looked back.

Yuu had them all convinced to announce their presence before opening a room because of ghosts or something. Yuu would also cook plenty and then eat and leave one serving behind, telling them not to touch it.

Yuu would then leave the room and return after a couple of seconds to eat that one serving, much to everyone's confusion and surprise. After all, Yuu usually ate little, and sometimes the plate was full, but this time, there were two plates.

When asked, Yuu who devoured the food almost like a starving animal simply replied, "I'm hungry."

Seeing his everyday strange quirks, the meaning simply changed into something else.

[chipsncookies]

#0478 Froslass

Imagine you're lost on a snowy mountain and you see this, what would you do?

[tothepointofinsanity]

Been thinking about your love post. I mean of course I love you, I love everyone and everything. Love dosent come in one form, the Ancient Greeks for example had many words for love like Agape (love for everyone), Eros (romantic), Philia (platonic), and storge (familair)

Love is why we became the dominant species as it was through the passion of teaching and the love of one another to form tribes. Love isn’t what makes us human, it’s what makes us alive, not just us but for all species. If you did turn evil, you would still be loved, but others would be worried because they love you in some form or another.

I’m too nervous to send this off anon, but love is everywhere. Love is in the sowing of you pillow you sleep with, love is in the art that you make. Love is here, and if you weren’t loved, you wouldn’t be here. <3

Love is so…alienating. If justified that it raised the foundation of human civilisation, then naturally I would feel adverse to it. I am not a human like the rest of this spongy species. Would be easier for me to experience and give love, wouldn’t it? But no. I do not abide by any conventions of what love is supposed to be, and whether or not it makes us feel alive. I do not know what it is, and that is why its connection and value to me is vastly different, more so when people insist I am included in its celebration. It’s not something I would simply feel welcome to.

In a way, I do think it makes me feel incredibly envious of people who are readily willing to love and be loved, who are generally connected to others as a whole and can attest to its positives. I am here today thanks to my very lovely loveless mother and her 5 billion hereditary disorders and the people who respect me. Love is not what shackles me to this mortality, but the virtue of duty, and I suppose the glaring problem at the end of the day is not whether I am loved, but whether I can accept it as it is. Until then, I will continue to sneer at the mention of love, be suspicious of it, and ponder a lonely existence for the rest of this life.

[firstroseofspring]

memory, death and life as komerex zha, the perpetual game; klingon culture as depicted in the final reflection, by john m. ford

[teecupangel]

An AU idea where, after Ezio fist fights the pope and enters the vault, there is no Minerva waiting for the prophet with a message, just a naked Desmond, unconscious on the floor, lined like an Apple of Eden with no memory of what happened after he touched the eye, and very little memory of what happened before that. He knows his name, he knows he's an assassin, and he knows he died to save the world. But he doesn't know when or where that happened or how he ended up in the vault.

This makes me think about how everyone would react to the mostly used plot point that Desmond and Altaïr share too many similar facial features.

Without Ezio hearing about Desmond’s name from Minerva, all the information he has about Desmond is the following:

His name is Desmond (from Desmond)

He’s an Assassin (from Desmond)

He believes he died saving the world (from Desmond)

Everything else is foggy (implied from Desmond’s ‘I’m not sure’ answers to most of Ezio’s questions)

This vault is meant to hold something very powerful (from Mario)

Only the prophet (him) may open the vault (from Altaïr’s Codex)

God dwells in the vault (from Rodrigo)

Now, a funny conclusion to make would that Ezio’s religious upbringing makes him think Desmond is Jesus (died to save the world + ‘god’ dwells in the vault). XD

Another idea that Ezio could potentially get to using mental gymnastics is that Desmond is related to Altaïr in some way.

Now, the Codex doesn’t specifically say who Altaïr’s sons are. To be more specific, what his son’s names are sooooo…

Ezio could believe that Desmond is Altaïr’s son.

This would make sense in his mind on why Altaïr seemed to know about the vault and why he’s invested in it but hid it in his Codex. Desmond looking a lot like Altaïr also points to this.

His working theory is that Desmond had sacrificed his life to save the world (perhaps it is connected to Genghis Khan in some way? It wasn’t like they had a lot of records about the Levantine Brotherhood anyway) and Altaïr, a father grieving the death of his son, used an unknown Piece of Eden to revive him.

Maybe the revival process took too much time and Altaïr knew he would be dead before his son would wake up.

Maybe Altaïr thought he had failed.

Whatever the reason may be, the revival process happened in the Vault underneath Vatican and Altaïr sealed it off with Desmond either sleeping or healing inside.

And Altaïr left the hidden message to guide a prophet to the vault.

To wake his son and give him another chance of life.

Now, at this point, Machiavelli and Claudia would most certainly think that it’s a stretch. Mario would be more on Ezio’s side since old Assassin family have, at this point, pretty much exaggerated Altaïr’s skills and contributions with hero worshipping that can rival Kadar’s very common among them.

But they would all agree that Desmond needs to be protected and helped.

Also, Desmond could easily wield the Apple and command it without any problems but they are concerned of the way the glowing lines on his body became brighter whenever he uses the Apple so they let Ezio keep it for now.

Now, may I suggest more complication?

Desmond retains all the skills he got from the Bleeding Effect and he also feels a painful ache whenever he looked at Altaïr’s statue, describing it as ‘grief’ or the sense of ‘longing’.

Ezio believes this is another indication of Desmond being Altaïr’s son.

Desmond also says ‘He taught me… my… brother?’ whenever someone asked how he performed a specific Assassin movement or skill that they may or may not know.

Ezio believes Desmond is talking about Altaïr’s other son (maybe even sons) as Altaïr’s Codex did say ‘our sons’, not ‘our son’.

But both of these are actually because of Desmond’s Bleeding Effect. He feels the same grief and longing for both Altaïr and Ratonhnhaké:ton, it just shows more because Altaïr’s statue is right there, knocking in his head the closed stuck door holding all his memories. Calling them ‘brothers’ is more of Desmond’s mind screwing up the idea of ‘ancestors’ with a ‘Brotherhood’ because his Assassin ancestors are all his brothers in the Brotherhood after all.

And, to further screw up Desmond, his memories come in flashes.

But not his memories of Desmond Miles.

His memories of reliving the memories of Ezio Auditore.

For example, the day the Papal Army is about to lay siege to their town, Desmond sees a vision of the town in shambles, of Ezio getting hit and Mario dying.

He doesn’t know the context of any of these.

He doesn’t even know when it will happen.

But Ezio gets everyone to take it seriously because this is a man they found sleeping in a vault that supposedly never been opened before (“Altaïr opened it.” “We don’t know that for certain.”)

Monteriggioni suffered heavy damages but it stood the attack and Desmond’s mastery over the Apple made the Papal Army fight one another.

That’s when Desmond gets another vision.

He has a vision of Ezio with many Assassins behind him… in Rome.

And that is how we kick Ezio to AC Brotherhood’s storyline while keeping Monteriggioni sorta intact and Mario alive… with Desmond acting as his seer but he has to stay with Ezio because he only has visions if Ezio is nearby (although it is pretty random).

[aha-chuu]

Can't decide whether I prefer Neuvillette looking like an old man (white hair + grandpa demeanour + dad vibes for all the melusine) or if I like him looking like a pretty, youthful model (super young by dragon years + in game model baby-face + actually very inexperienced in human conduct = immature?)

All the fanart I see kind of just picks one but idkkkk,,, I sort of enjoy the idea that he's kinda young looking but talks and acts very very old because, you know, in human terms he is very old. And everyone in Fontaine is used to it cos they all know he's not human and appearance ≠ reality. But people usually see him from pretty far away in the Opera house, so they can only see the white hair and hear his old man voice. So when he rarely does show up in person the public has a jumpscare of "oh not literally a grandpa huh uh oh".

And he definitely doesn't look like teenage or twenties, even youthful Neuvillette has gotta be like late thirties earliest. Mature but not actually as old as anyone would expect.

[aziraphales-library]

do you have a fic where it’s what would have happened if crowley and aziraphale hadn’t met at the garden?

Check our #different first meeting tag for fics like this! Here are some more to add to the collection...

Till death do us part (or not) by fractalgeometry (G)

Possible other titles for this fic, since they summarize it better than I ever could:

Assumed mortality, and other reasons to dump people

In my defense the odds of both of us being immortal is extremely slim

Awkward Tesco reunions: the real curse of immortality

that awkward moment when your ex from 300 years ago turns out to also be immortal

You always meet twice (and sometimes the second time is after 300 years in a fucking tesco and you embarass yourself in front of the cashier)

(Aka the fic in which they are both immortal, they do not realize this, and they break up and think the other is dead for several centuries before it turns out that wait, they're both very much alive after all and also, possibly, walnuts.)

My Immortal Beloved by Fyre (T)

A couple of centuries ago, Crowley had a Thing with an average normal human. Only for some reason, every letter he ever sent to that average normal human has just turned up in a museum exhibit. Including the ones about licking.

HallMark of the Beast by Dee_Morris (T)

Fast-living demon Crowley has had enough of city life and moved to the quiet little town of Tadfield with his young ward, The Adversary, Destroyer of Kings, Angel of the Bottomless Pit, Great Beast That is Called Dragon, Prince of This World, Father of Lies, Spawn of Satan, and Lord of Darkness. It seems like the perfect place to relax and lay low, avoiding eye contact with the forces of Hell while also fulfilling the letter of his contract, which is to educate the Adversary on his Great Destiny. And the Christmas decorations are lovely. Life gets less relaxing when he meets Aziraphale, a semiretired angel who has been living in Tadfield and awaiting the arrival of the Antichrist for several centuries. Sparks fly when the two meet and realize that they have more in common with each other than with their respective head offices.

The Great Pretender or A Man with (at least two) Secrets by Makkoska (E)

The demon Crowley is seeing Mr Fell, a peculiar and fascinating bookshop owner. He knows the man has secrets, but doesn’t quite realize the extent of them. Or: It’s London, the 21st century. An ethereal and an occult creature meet and fall in love without realizing they are missing essential information about the other.

Shifting Heaven and Earth by BuggreAlleThis (T)

For most of history, since he narrowly avoiding Falling from Heaven with Lucifer, Crowley has been working for the Angelic Corruption Unit. This ended up being far more boring than he hoped it would be, but things change when he is assigned to go undercover on Earth. His mission is to investigate Aziraphale, an infamous angel who has been on Earth since its Creation, and whom Heaven is sure is guilty of corruption or dereliction of duty. He soon discovers that life on Earth is far more complicated than he'd been led to imagine, especially when Aziraphale's demonic counterpart, Hastur, arrives on the scene.

- Mod D

[puppetmaster13u]

Cryptid batfamily, but the world starts learning about the 'vigilantes' in Gotham via a school project that they think is some sort of Analog horror or ARG. Like it gets incredibly popular because wow the CGI and videos are really good? Can you imagine if you had to worry about seemingly immortal killer clowns and undead bird creatures running around? Wow wouldn't that be crazy. And the lore is so fun too? Like there's the big shadow creature who steals away children who stay out too late? Some sort of crocodile man living in the sewers? A swamp that sometimes revives the dead? Like damn, what a cool series.

But then, then other heroes start to emerge around the world. People with super-speed, ancient warriors, honest to god aliens and magic. Which makes people start to wonder, even if it's just in the back of their minds, What if it's all true?

[0809sysblings]

Amane is a character that is super easy to misinterpret. If you try to take her at face value, you are not going to get very far. And not cause she's deceitful or lying. But I think it is because she says what she thinks she believes. And, in my opinion, what should be given the most attention is not if she actually believes what she's saying or not, but why she would believe what she's saying. That will give you a lot more insight into her character and a lot more to work with, I think.

[hufflepuffwritingstuff2]

The Mermaid Ask Game seems fun 👀 How about: 5 3 9?

Hi Space Rabbit! Interesting combination, I’ll have a go at it! Thanks for requesting this, here you go!

From This Ask Game

Whumpee had really done it this time. They had angered some sea witch and now look at them- out in the open water, with a tail instead of legs, webbed ears, gills around their neck, and scales everywhere. They didn’t know how to get home from here, and they definitely didn’t know how they were going to get to their house without legs.

A ship passing by nearly hit Whumpee head on. They just managed to avoid being keel-hauled- thank goodness the tail made them a fast swimmer at least.

“Look out, men! A sea monster!”

A sea monster!? Whumpee thought, turning frantically in the water, Where!?

A net tossed over their head answered the question.

Oh. Right.

“Now hang on a minute!” Whumpee called up at the frightened sailors.

“It speaks!”

“It’s got fangs the size of me fingers!”

Whumpee felt their teeth with their tongue. OW! They tasted copper in their mouth. They must look pretty scary.

The sailors started hauling the net up. Whumpee started thrashing and struggling, which only served to tangle them up more.

“Come on guys!” Whumpee pleaded, “do I look like I eat people!? Let me go!”

Their pleas fell on deaf ears as they tumbled on deck. They could barely move at all they were so tightly enmeshed in the net.

“It’s got a great fish’s tail.” “Frightful bad luck to have a sea monster on board, isn’t it?”

“Should we cook it?”

“No!” Whumpee protested at that last comment.

The captain strode up to them, crouching down. They felt Whumpee’s scales with a calloused hand.

“What are you?” they whispered in shock.

“Oh for the love of- what does it look like!?” Whumpee snapped, “I’m just trying to get home! So I’m half fish now, it’s not like I’m some deep sea kraken or something! If you’re not going to let me go, at leasr get me out of this stupid net!”

Whumpee wriggled a little more for emphasis.

“Men,” the captain said, “what we have here is a mer. Very dangerous creatures, they are.”

Whumpee rolled their eyes.

“They’ll say anything to deceive you, be mindful of them. We can’t just let them go, or they’d lure some poor soul to their demise. But their scales… their scales might fetch us a pretty penny.”

Whumpee’s eyes widened.

“Take it down to the brig,” the captain said, “prepare a tub of water. I don’t want it dying on us.”

Whumpee groaned in exasperation. It was gonna take forever to get home now.

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[snowdecahdrn]

We all know Human!Blitzø would just be Brandon Rogers, right?

[spockvarietyhour]

bold spider tattoo in the middle of a balding head.