#probably why I'm so happy about Heartstopper

[will80sbyers]

I really don't like bisexuals being characterized as mostly hypersexual in the media, not that that's inherently a bad thing, that's part of life too but it's good to acknowledge that there is a large range of different types of people and many bi people don't actually date or sleep around that much... and that if you're bi and only have been with people of a different gender than your own or only with people with your own gender you're still bisexual anyway because being bisexual is about who you're attracted to not about putting it into action or not

[sophielovesbooks]

I was tagged by @dauen for the mid-year book freakout tag, and I was genuinely so excited because I had been meaning to do it, but then I wondered if anybody even cared. So yes, thank you so much! <3 And let's gooo ~

1. Best book you’ve read so far this year

Birnam Wood. Hands down. Everybody go read Birnam Wood.

2. Best sequel you’ve read so far this year

This question made me realise I don't read a lot of sequels. The ONLY one I've read so far this year is Hell Bent (the sequel to "Ninth House"). And it was kind of fun. But I didn't love it.

3. New release you haven’t read yet

Hm... I suppose I don't keep up with new releases like I used to. Though Carrie Soto Is Back comes to mind, if that counts as a new release. And Sea of Tranquility from last year. (I accidentally just mispelled that as "Transquility" lol)

4. Most anticipated release for the second half of the year

Okay, so this is super niche and a bit weird, but it might be The Otherworld by Abbie Emmons. I've never actually read anything by her and I'm not sure if it'll be good, but I know her from YouTube and I'm curious. Has anybody else on here read any of her books?

5. Biggest disappointment

Probably The Midnight Library. I had seen so many people raving about this book online, but I HATED it. Genuinely the most amateurish writing I have come across in years. And so, so preachy. Not trying to be mean here. But yeah, it wasn't for me.

Oh, and Kill All Your Darlings by David Bell was also bad, sadly.

6. Biggest surprise

Hm. Birnam Wood was the biggest surprise regarding how much I loved it. And also regarding the ending. And Rock Paper Scissors by Alice Feeney had one of the coolest plot twists I came across this year.

7. Favourite new author (debut or new to you)

100% ELEANOR CATTON WHO WROTE BIRNAM WOOD IT WAS SO GOOD OMG!

Also Victoria Gosling? I am currently reading Before The Ruins by her and it's quite good as well. Beautiful writing. Kind of entrancing. I feel like fans of The Secret History would be into it?

8. Newest fictional crush/newest favourite character

Hmm, I don't really get fictional crushes. But if I did, I would have to say Mira or Tony from, you guessed it, Birnam Wood. (Oh, and maybe David from Before the Ruins. Also quite cute.)

9. Book that made you cry

Hehe. What do you think. You have one guess. Oh, you said Birnam Wood? Correct. Why have I only read one great book this year so far lmao

10. Book that made you happy

Ummm... All of this is forcing me to face the fact that my reading year so far has NOT been that good. I reread If We Were Villains and that made me happy. For non-fiction I read Undrowned and that made me happy at times. But other passages were really sad and emotional.

11. Favourite Adaptation

Heartstopper! And I'm really excited for Red, White & Royal Blue! <3

12. Prettiest Cover

Though disappointing overall, Kill All Your Darlings did have a lovely cover:

13. A book you need to read before the end of the year

Gosh, so many! From a quick glance at my shelves: The Rehearsal, The Initial Insult, Outliers, Shadow of the Lions, Weapons of Math Destruction... and so many more. That I know I won't get to. So some are on my 2024 TBR.

Tagging @hrimceald @books-and-cookies @b1uetrees @jay-avian @yoongsea @r-osehips @minyardcva if you want to. Curious to hear about your reading years so far :)

[retrieve-the-kraken]

Heartstopper season 2 play-by-play analysis

This would be the moment in the typical movie where the character comes out and gets the happy ending and love ever after, and everything is alright, right?

But coming out is a choice for some people, and not so much for others, and it's not always perfect, and love does not always conquer all, and sometimes love is not even part of your story...

And sometimes there are many more issues, and not so simple solutions, and things aren't always black and white...

I'm getting ahead of myself, aren't I?

EPISODE 6 - TRUTH/DARE

- Nick knew how to get to the café without consulting Google maps or anything, which means this is a place he’s been to before.

- Nick and Charlie letting go of each other’s hands as they walk into the cafe. And “would you feel better if I waited here?” Nick’s rotund and absolute “NO,” then, a little as if to make sure that Charlie knows it’s about himself being nervous and not about Charlie being imposing, he adds “No, please come with me.”

- “He used to visit every summer”, and it makes you wonder why he stopped. Then Stephane really has no idea how old his son is and how much time he still has before he graduates, because he’s not involved in Nick’s life. Any child of divorced parents knows that nod either means Martine is not interested in meeting Nick (and probably David), or Stephane is unsure of how to bring it up. Or both. “Perhaps someday soon,” means “I will put it off forever because I don’t want to deal with that.” Martine definitely had to do something with Nick not visiting anymore, and even David probably hasn’t stayed with him either. Yet David brings it up when we first see him. “Next time I’ll stay with dad”. Sure. (Even the fact that he mentions how their dad will react when he finds out Nick is bi, indicates that he still very much cares about his father’s opinions and thoughts, even when Stephane doesn’t seem to care much about his sons’ lives.)

- “I’m sorry, something came up and I can’t get out of it.” Did you even try, sir? Dad bails out, this was probably always inteded to happen, to have a very short meeting, just enough to not leave Nick hanging completely. But because he leaves money behind to pay the bill, he thinks everything’s okay.

- Nick’s face when he realizes that coming out to his dad won’t happen, at least for now. Not only did he not stay long enough to even bring it up, but he assumes he’s straight and talks a lot about him having lots of girlfriends, and Nick is probably thinking that it’s just going to be like David, or worse. (Considering that even Sara said some things, assuming that Nick was into girls exclusively, it’s not like he was sure that she would react so great about him coming out, but it’s clearly very different with his dad, who is never there but for whom he still had a lot of admiration and excitement about being able to meet up. He wants his dad to know him, to know about him, to be proud of him. Maybe there’s even a little of “look, dad, you’re not in my life, but look how well I’m doing anyway”. I don’t know, I’m not a boy, and my parents didn’t divorce when I was still a teenager.)

- New favorite friendship dynamic unlocked: Charlie, Isaac and Nick squished up in one bad trying to find Wally.

- Other new favorite friendship dynamic: the boys asking Tao for every single detail of his kiss with Elle. “But I kissed her that time.” “OH MY GOD NO YOU DIDN’T” “What does this mean???”

- Meanwhile in the girls’ room, the dynamic is much the same, but I love that we get to see it for both groups.

- Tara is so sweet, always making sure that Isaac doesn’t feel excluded.

- “So are we-?” Elle making Tao short-circuit with a kiss.

- Charlie deflecting Nick’s question by asking him about how he’s feeling. And Nick refusing to let him get away with it. “I know I’ve been stressed about coming out, but I don’t think I realized how stressed out you’ve been about it.” “I get stressed about everything, you’re nothing special.” “Charlie- It matters to me.” Classic Charlie humor deflection technique. Poor Charlie, he’s never in a million years imagined that he’d fall for someone who cared so much about him, and he doesn’t even know what to do with himself.

- Ugh, this whole interaction between the teachers is soooooooo perfectly off of the comic book page. Mr Ajayi fishing for info on Mr Farouk. Awww Mr Farouk… “Don’t think there’s an age limit on those”.

- "You flirting with me?" "Maybe." MISTER AJAYI‼ AAAAAAHHHH‼

- “They are gonna be a handful today.” Power of prophecy.

- “Thanks, I hate it.” “I knew you would.” Tara, if you don’t want it, I can take it off your hands. (Seriously, where can I get that t-shirt?). I think the pressure of giving an amazing gift is so overrated, why not get your significant other the worst gift ever? That’s amazing.

- Darcy taking the first step at talking about her feelings, thank god, because things between them have been horribly tense and all over the place… “I’ve got plans, big plans.” Oh shit…

-SO MUCH GREEN. Darcy and Tara matching tops, Elle’s whole outfit, Sahar’s vest, Isaac’s vest, Imogen’s striped sweater. And Charlie’s sweater is a big blue-greeny, I feel (and then later he wears the green hoodie). But I think it’s interesting that Nick is wearing blue now, both during the day and then at the party, on the episode where he comes out to more people. Everyone perceives him as heterosexual, so he has to fight that heteronormativity applied to him. He wears the color and defies what it represents.

- I am Isaac at the bookshop, wandering around with a huge pile of books, knowing that I won’t be able to buy all of them, but by all the gods I will try…

- By the way, here's Isaac’s reading list from this season.

- Have kids these days stopped saying “take a picture of me” but instead say “take a selfie of me”? As if the word selfie has replaced the word picture?

- It’s sad how Nick and Charlie take a selfie in front of Notre Dame(?), and they seem tempted to kiss, but then walk away, whereas behind them, Tao and Elle don’t have to think about it at all. Until they walk into the area full of pride flags, and Nick and Charlie can feel more comfortable walking with joined hands. But that’s it.

- The pile of books on Isaac’s end of the bed… I want them all.

- The recharging scene is so lovely. They are so soft with each other. Charlie getting all worked up from that kiss and Nick just says “We gotta go”. I hate you too, Nick, how dare you.

- “Everything has to be perfect for Tara, she’s a princess.” Darcy is feeling so guilty, but she’s terrible at making up.

- Tara’s face when Darcy brings out the booze… oh no…

- The fact that Ben just sneaks into the party, unnoticed, and he just meekly goes around, trying to pass under the radar.

- Seriously, is there any queer boy that is not into Charlie (except Isaac of course)? First Ben, then Nick, and now even James. If only Charlie himself knew, the power he has…

- Even though we already know where this is going with Isaac, James’s little face still breaks my heart. He was so smitten with Isaac… and that was his first kiss… and he probably thought they were two booknerds in love… and… *weeps*

- Wait, so if James hadn’t kissed Isaac just before, that means that his literal first kiss could have almost been his former crush during truth or dare in front of everyone???? Nightmare scenario…

- Isaac, baby… I have now cried every single time I’ve watched this scene, I wonder if it will happen every single time. My little ace heart can’t take it.

- Nick really doesn’t like parties, or he hasn’t liked parties since he met Charlie, because he prefers hanging out with Charlie. Why pretend to have fun when you could be happily making googly eyes at your soulmate in a quiet corner? (Again, with Golden Retriever twin Darcy interrupting).

- The contrast between the party room, full of color and shiny decorations, whilst Harry and his mate stand outside in the harsh blue light of the corridor (again, blue representing heteronormativity).

- Harry apologizes to Charlie and Nick but he sounds so insincere, he’s smiling the entire time like he’s not really taking this seriously, and it’s all made worse by his friend behind him smiling smugly. They really thought it would work… Charlie is not intimidated by Harry anymore, not even a little bit, and we love him for that. Slam that door in his face, Charlie, that’s my son.

- At this point, why hasn’t anyone kicked out Ben yet? You’d think everyone would be behind Imogen on this. Unless she really doesn’t care, of course, she’s over him. And he just looks kind of relieved that he has managed to not get kicked out, but also… is that a bit of bitterness that I sense, at the fact that Charlie continues to stand up for himself and ignore him completely.

- As the game of truth-or-dare begins, it feels like maybe Ben wants to fit in, wants to be a part of this group, but he’s not entirely comfortable, but he’s still there, following the dynamic, maybe hoping that he’ll just be… accepted? And not have to put any work into it? (Am I reading too much into this?)

- “Imogen got a boyfriend last year and she stopped texting me.” “Uh, no, you stopped texting me.” The way that Imogen sort of nervously pushes her hair behind her ear… is kind of… flirty…?

- One of my favorite moments that’s not in the comics, the Charlie-Tao kiss had me in stitches. It’s the cheeky way that Tao crawls over, and Charlie’s embarrassed delight and Nick and Elle’s delighted faces. I love them so much. (Can't believe no one had giffed that yet, or at least I couldn't find it, so I had to do it myself! Guys, I'm really bad at this stuff, help!)

- Who is this person stirring the pot??? Poor James, poor Charlie. But I love Charlie going resolutely “No, no way” when he’s dared to kiss Ben. And Ben resorts to his usual tactics of pretending not to know Charlie (Imogen’s face, knowing that something definitely happened between Charlie and Ben… that Ben is hiding something, and that Charlie very vehemently wants nothing to do with him).

- And you know Ben wanted to bump into Nick so bad on his way out. “Always making a scene…”

- “I know who it was.” He takes the leap, and he checks with Charlie and he knows that, whatever happens, it will be okay. Elle’s smiling, Tara is smiling, but Tao still looks a bit tense.

- I loved everyone’s reaction to Nick coming out, very chill and “oooh so you gave him the hickey?” And Nick looks so relieved, they both do. And James, precious James, asking if they want it to be kept secret… And then Darcy, of course…

- That whole hallway scene all the way to the room, it’s so sweet. Notice how they go from blue-ish lighting to yellow lighting, the color of happiness, their color. Nick envelops Charlie in the warmest hug and they just, ugh, so fucking cute… then the whole carrying him over his shoulder, I want to know how many times they had to do that scene, it’s so perfect. (Had to gif this one too, am I searching wrong???)

- The bed fight, the pillow fight, and then the conversation about not being ready to do anything more than kissing yet. Nick was so nervous, the way he wasn’t nervous when he was the one kissing Charlie’s neck. This time it was his boyfriend being sexy, it was his boyfriend taking the lead and getting him all worked up… he had to stop it, because he realized that he was starting to feel things that he wasn’t ready for at the moment.

- “Why are we like this?”… Like what? Like perfect? Like the cutiest patootiest of all?

- Tao wearing Elle’s glasses and teasing her, whilst Imogen and Sahar are cuddled up in the next bed… And Isaac… baby…

- “I have to be perfect for you.” “Darcy, nobody’s perfect.” Darcy saying I love you with vomit in her mouth and smeared makeup and a crumpled party hat on her head, whilst Tara looks immaculate in her tiara and gold weaved into her braids and her white sweater…

- Mr Farouk giving Darcy a break, like he’s maybe not so strict anymore (because of someone’s influence)…

- I DON’T KNOW HOW MANY TIMES NOW I’VE WATCHED THE TEACHERS GOING FOR IT BUT I’M SQUEALING AGAIN. AAAAAAAHHHH‼ CAN’T WAIT FOR MORE TEACHERS NEXT SEASON‼

- That whole Charlie and Nick talking and sleeping montage fixed my mental health, cleared my skin, watered my crops and fed my cows. I have watched it in an loop. It’s beautiful.

- They are finally sitting together in the coach! And so are Elle and Tao. Meanwhile Tara and Darcy...

- The post about Mr Farouk. Merciless.

- Meanwhile both Mr Farouk and Mr Ajayi looking a bit tense and unsure after...

- “Is it true you guys are dating???” They haven't even gotten back from Paris... News spread fast...

This episode is brought to you by Whatever the Hell Darcy was Drinking™.

[ben-j-erickson]

RWRB: Thoughts on the movie

SO a while back, i let the entire internet(like 2 people) know my thoughts on the RWRB trailer. i watched the movie last night. and i have so many, SO SO many thoughts about it. Buckle in kiddos, this is gonna be one long fucking post.

In honor of Mr. Alex Claremont-Diaz and his endless lists, here are some lists including but not limited to what i liked and what i didn't like.

What i liked:

Uma Thurman. Slayed as per usual. I did think they could've done more with her bc she's so much more mom-president in the books. Still, though, Uma Thurman is always amazing and it's amazing to see her.

The way they did the texts and calls? Phenomenal! Did they technically only do that once? yes but we ignore that for a minute

The way that they addressed being queer and the coming-out experience. Everyone deserves to be able to figure out their sexuality/gender in their own time and to be able to tell the world at their time and pace. And they made sure to put that in the movie. [Quick tangent: two of the biggest queer projects of the year(so far), Heartstopper and RWRB both have themes about coming out and how it should be. ]

The sex scenes were actually not bad. The "let's make love" scene never happened in the book and their first time having sex together was way more low-key in the book but I liked that gay intimacy was shown in a very unflinching sort of way. The book certainly doesn't shy away from-for lack of a better word- smut and I'm glad that the movie took a less fade-to-black approach. (and yes, reader, it did make me want to get dicked down. No, I will not elaborate, take from that what you will)

Phillip. I never thought that I'd say this but Phillip in his little 2hr condensed form is actually really accurate. he pisses me off and he's condescending and a real prick. good job writers

Okay. That's some stuff i liked. Apologies readers, my dislike list might be longer than my like list but its coming from a place of love, I promise

What I didn't like:

June. WHERE WAS JUNE???? i get that its a 2-ish hr amazon movie but still. You're gonna have Nora(more on her in just a sec) but not June?? June was a very big part of the book who is a big support for Alex and is just generally cool. Making Alex an only child did not feel right y'all.

If you're gonna have Nora in the movie or like combine Nora and June or whatever the writers/directors/producers had in mind, then DO IT RIGHT. Nora in the books is firmly queer and cool and like probably austistic and a hacker(?). She's got her own sideplot with the whole Richards leak(again, more on that later). She helps Alex come to terms with his bisexuality. And you're just gonna make her a little side character that gives Alex advice and is maybe working on the Claremont campaign. like c'mon. Nora and June are Alex's support system, they're the people he relies on, the people who have seen him before being first-son and after becoming first-son.

Speaking of Alex being the first son, i wasn't happy that they sort of just glossed over Alex's insecurities. we get a little of them in the emails but part of what makes Alex so relatable is that he is confident and he is smart and he does want to help people but he also understands and feels the difference between himself and Henry. Henry is white and British and privileged and has a myriad of insecurities too but Henry will never understand being judged solely on your skin. On being compared to someone else but understanding the double-standards that come along with it. i honestly don't know if i put it correctly but that is why i loved alex so much.

FUCKING MIGUEL RAMOS. WHO MADE THAT FUCKING DECISION????? first off, for those who have yet to read the book, Miguel Ramos is not in the book. Rafael Luna is. Liam is. Both men are very important for Alex(and Henry)'s story. Liam is a key component in Alex's journey in bisexuality. Rafael Luna's involvement in the Richards Campaign is also very important plot-wise. Luna is also one of the guys who Alex realises he thought was hot btw.

The Richards Campaign!?!?!?!! felt very non-important. like i just don't really feel the need to root for the Claremont Campaign or root against the Richards Campaign when they sort of take a backseat. in the book the Richards campaign is the one to leak the emails and its a more malicious strike against the Claremont Campaign vs a jealous reporter who the Alex hooked up with once leaking the story.

WHILE we're on the emails, i know that you can only fit so much in here but COME ON MAN. the emails are sort of the foundation of Henry and Alex's romance. they text(AFTER ALEX GIVES HENRY HIS NUMBER BTW) and then they email each other and its so gay/bi and so happy and so romantic and the quotes man the FUCKING quotes and i didn't get that and can you tell that the emails mean a lot to me

the "history,huh?" moment did not feel as impactful to me. fight me on that , i don't care.

Bea. Said it before, not how i pictured. But boy did they really reduce Bea. Mind you, she's got a very big role in Henry's life an they do try but the powder princess stuff is kind of important.

Princess Catherine. Where is she? Who knows? Again, cut for time but my gosh people, she's the reason Queen Mary turns around on Henry and Alex.

Speaking of Queen Mary, they switched her around for a king?!?!?! LISTEN i get not wanting to make real-world comparisons yadayadayada but Stephen Fry?!?!?! im so sorry that man is too nice for you to try to convince me that he's a racist and homophobic ruler.

Alex's parents. They're together, i guess? minor thing so that's why its here idk.

SO that was a lot of complaints and some good stuff.

You may be thinking "THANK GOODNESS, it's over"

WRONG.

I have more thoughts, dear reader.

Look, was it a perfect adaptation? no. adaptations rarely are.

Was it a good movie? yes. it was.

This movie made my little gay POC heart very VERY happy. it made me happy to see something that I treasure be put out into the world in a movie that I will be watching over and over and over. I'm obviously not pleased with the multiple liberties they took but I'm taking what I can. We need more queer everything out in the world. More queer books, more queer movies, more queer photography, more queer tv shows, more queer museum exhibits, you name it. Given the current state of the world and attitudes about queer people, it is essential to make and consume queer media in all its forms. Queer media makes sure that everyone knows that we're here and queer and we're not going anywhere. This is an important story to tell. And it doesn't have to be perfect. It just needs to tell OUR stories.

Henry, Alex (and also Nick Nelson and Charlie Spring) have made me want a love like theirs. A love that is genuine and real and honest and full of hope. A love who understands me and who I understand. To quote Dr. Taylor Alison Swift: "A love that was really something, not just the idea of something."

[happilyloveless]

My one problem with Heartstopper...

is about Isaac... But I first wanna say that i LOVE hearstopper! I'm a big fan of the series and the webcomic. I also love all Alice's books. So even though there is a character that I don't like that much, I still adore the show!

Okay, I REALLY wanted to like Isaacs character! The biggest important reason i liked Alice's work is because the ACE representation. I learned a lot about myself by reading Loveless, Radiosilence...That might be reason that I had high expectations of Isaac. But I still couldn't really like Isaac.Even though I really wanted to! (no offense to the actor who is playing him. He's doing a great job! And he seems like a cool person in real life) However, I must say that thanks to his reading obsession, I now have a lot of new books that I want to read! 😊)

My problem is that Isaac doesn't really feel like an important part of their squad. For starters, the boy is ALWAYS reading! I'm a big reader myself, but if someone is reading almost ALL THE TIME, including parties, it makes me wonder how they even became friends?

He doesn't have that many conversations with his friends. I'm also often quiet (as an introvert 😊) with my friends, but with Isaac I feel like we never really see him bonding with his friends? We actually don't know much about him. We know that he likes reading and since season 2 we know more about him being asexual. But that's basically it...

Also, when Isaac got mad at his friends, his friends never talked to him about it afterwards? The scene where they took a picture togehter at prom was sweet, but I still feel like his friends should have been more concerned that he was suddenly that frustrated. Okay, Isaac said that he didn't want to talk about it (after he got mad), but it still feels a bit weird that his friends didn't push more?

Btw, I really get why Isaac got that frustrated. All of his friends were walking in pairs like they're animals going to Noah's Ark 😂

One of the reasons I'm a bit disappointed with Isaac is probably because I keep comparing him with Aled (which is unfair, i know, but I can't help it). Aled is also an introvert. He's also pretty quiet. But you can really feal the bond between him and his friends. He has some really sweet moments with his friends that I'm missing with Isaac.

Ace representation is soooo important! So I'm happy and thankful that Heartstopper exists. This was just something that I couldn't stop thinking about. Still very excited to see how his storyline will continue, but I just hope that we can learn a bit more about him as a person.

[shinra-makonoid]

To anon m/m fiction:

Tumblr is very dumb, I had an anon asking for m/m fiction and I started a reply, saved it up in my draft then mistakenly queued it, then erased it because for some reason I couldn't edit it, and now the anon ask is gone... wtf.

So my reply to the anon asking about m/m fiction: I think about it but it's difficult because I know great stories that feature m/m but I'm not sure it makes them great m/m fictions you see? Like I think those are different and I'm not 100% what you're exactly looking for.

- Recently I started The Fall of the House of Usher and it features diverse LGBT people without it being a trope nor used as a narrative tool. so this is not a m/m fiction to me, but it is a good story featuring at least one m/m couple, another being mentioned, and some poly pairings. It's very dark and gore though so you gotta like that too. You can't imagine the relief that it is for me to see people being LGBT or poly and it not being a big deal at all.

- On the other hand, while I love Our Flag Means Death because it is funny and shows at least two adorable m/m couples, mention a few m/m pairings. I wouldn't call it "story featuring m/m couple" in that case I'd call it m/m fiction. The emphasis on the couples is very heavy and is a main narrative item during the TV show.

- Nimona, the animation has a m/m pairing but it's not a main narrative element, so I'd say this is a fiction featuring m/m couple.

- One of my favourite TV shows of all time is "Please Like Me" which is an Australian show about a guy who has a girlfriend but comes out as gay. It's more like a TV show featuring m/m because it talks about a lot of stuff like suicide, mental health, relationship abuse, abortion, divorce etc. The main character is a bit mean though and I saw it could make people have a hard time, I think he's just a weirdo. It doesn't portray sex or relationship as this perfect idea, it's a lot of weirdness and uncomfortableness but I think it's very realistic in its depiction, no homophobia in it from that I can remember.

There are a couple of movies I know that I went to see at the theater that seemed like they can be categorized as are m/m fiction:

- God's Own Country, a farmer boy working all day meets a hot guy and develops feelings. It's really... Gay. And sometimes a bit strange imo, it's not really romantic from what I recall (it's been a while). I didn't get a lot of attachment to the characters.

- Call me By Your Name, who is again very gay, though it feels more romance-y to me. Some people have a hard time with it because the main couple has a huge age difference. I love the songs in it. It's a movie in which you take your time, it bored me a little bit.

- My favourite of the bunch which is The Happy Prince, a biopic about Oscar Wilde. I don't remember anything about the movie, only that it moved me profoundly. It's dramatic, sad, lots of homophobia. It's more sensitive, dark and sentimental than the other two imo, which is probably why I prefer it. I need to watch it again. I took the opportunity to find back what was the name because I couldn't remember it. Not sure if that's what you'd desire to watch though.

Then I could go on video games but I feel like it's not the same especially if you wanna figure out if it's your jam or not.

Anyway hope that helps somehow a little bit? I hope at least one makes you think it is a good one. There are a few others that exist like Love Simon or Heartstopper but I feel like it's not adult enough, it's cute though.

Thanks for the ask, even though Tumblr ate it!

[alarrytale]

How can u still assume that he’s a closeted gay man, when he literally only kisses straight men in front of the camera for laughs, yet is only ever seen making out with women otherwise. Body language analysis is a pseudoscience and you do not know how he feels about anyone. If he wasn’t into women why would he date Olivia for 2 years and get her freaking name tattooed? Who do you think forced him to get that tattoo. Maybe it’s time to stop being delusional

Hi,

I dont appreciate being called delusional, especially when your arguments are easily refuted. So maybe not do that if you want to have a real conversation and for me to even bother glancing at your ask. Since you actually brought some arguments along with your insult, i'm going to give you an answer.

Harry can kiss straight men for laughs and still be a gay man. Kissing men for laughs is probably a bit freeing for him as a closeted gay man. He can only kiss women (in public) because he is closeted. Not only is he closeted, but he's in a relationship with a man who's also closeted. That's why he's never been seen kissing a man in public. He has kissed a man on film, and for some of us that was with more passion and show of physical attraction than we've ever seen him give a woman. He is closeted for many reasons, but the gist of it is because the world is cruel to queer people. It's an advantage in many ways to be straight presenting. In order for him to make his label money and portray him as straight he has to enter pr relationships. Pr relationships are very common in Hollywood as a promotion tool, but also for closeting purposes. Just look look at it closely.

Since pr relationships has become so common, you now have to work harder to convince the public that you are the real deal, hence having to go further than ever to legitimise your relationship. That might mean getting a tattoo of your partners name on you.

You are right, body language analysis is a pseudoscience. But we all agree that this is a smile 🙂 and this is the opposite ☹️ right? You also agree that this here is a subtle act off affection, right?:

And this:

And that movies and series trying to portray subtle partner affection while being closeted is doing the exact same thing? Here is a gif from heartstopper (source):

The reasons why we know how Harry feels about Louis is several. He's said so explicitly. He's also said it indirectly, metaphorically and lyrically. He's also shown us, the way he treats him, tenderly and carefully, and very different from others, the way he stumbles over his words talking about him and how close he is to Louis' family to mention some.

So after all this, how can you not entertain the thought that Harry might not be straight? I know it might be a scary thought, because it means that he's decived us, played pretend and lied to us. And it shows us that the world isn't so black and white and perfect as we think. But most importantly, Harry is still Harry and he's a good person who makes lots of people very happy. I think people wants him to be happy too, and he's going to be really happy when he comes out. I hope you will be there to support him, alongside me, when he does.

[hard-to-love-blog]

I'm still not over Heartstopper actually. I've seen someone posting about how it shows different ways to be queer. And I want to tell a story that the show reminded me of. (It turned out to be a very long and possibly meaningless post)

So, it started in the beginning of my last school year. At that time I just figured my sexuality. I wasn't out to anyone and honestly was dealing with lots of internal homophobia.

The planning of the prom started in September. I wasn't really excited cause I didn't have friends to have fun with and I was basically an outcast. But I really really wanted to wear a tux to the prom, like with a bow tie and everything.

The procpect of asking mum to buy me one terrified me, cause she criticized me a lot already. She is one of the reasons of my self hate problems. At high school I basically figured that I'm not the daughter she wanted.

And when I did ask her, she (along with my sister and grandma) started telling things like "but you're supposed to be a princess" "you'll regret it" "we want you to wear a dress". But the worst phrase was "everyone will think you're lesbian". At that moment I realised that I'll probably never come out to them. This discussion lasted for whole school year and I actually got what I wanted.

I remember the first time I looked at myself in a suit. It was a joyful moment, I was crying and jumping out of happiness. I've felt comfortable and proud and confident, it was a big step to figuring out how to be myself. All the comments from my family mattered less. I realised that it's my prom and it's about me, not them.

And the prom was amazing. I didn't get bullied even once. And I've received some great compliments that I haven't received before. That night I gained hope that someday I'll find people who can accept me. And that I'll might learn to love myself fully.

I'm 20 now and study at the university. I have like two friends and I still struggle with social activities a lot. Some people here have hurt me and some have bullied me, hitting me with words where it hurts the most. Someone reminded me of what made me hate myself in school.

But I'm out and proud here. A lot of people support me. Yet I nearly got kicked out of uni for having lgbt+ flag at my dorm. And I know people like to gossip about me. But I'm still loud about myself. I try to encourage other queer people, but I'm honestly not good at that. I actually enjoy my life here.

But when I come home I still cry at nights cause I know that my family knows nothing about me. Because they don't love me unconditionally. Because I don't want that part of my life. Behind a proud lesbian there's a brocken girl who's actually very afraid.

This supposed to explain why Darcy's story meant a lot to me, as you might have guessed.

I don't know if someone needs a reminder, but you can't choose a family or a place of birth. If you didn't get much love in childhood, it's not your fault and nothing is wrong with you. And because you think everything is bad now, it doesn't mean it will always be like this. Your life probably won't be easy, and you'll remember all of the pain. You might still doubt yourself from time to time. But all this doesn't mean you can't have happiness. And despite everything, you're still a beautiful and lovable person.

[laylawatermelon]

So I just wanted to vent about this because I don't know why I'm so upset.

(very long post ahead read at your own risk) ps heavy topics implied/vaguely referenced (racism, school s-, outing, etc)

Watching Heartstopper for the first time when it first came out was kind of hard for me. For the first time in my life after about 18 or so years of living in an ultra religious dangerously othering country that quite literally promises (very bad things let's say) about queer people and others in general really I had given myself permission to just enjoy.

To not do the cringe and gag as I was taught in TV and in the church, to not roll my eyes and be hateful. To not dismiss an experience I don't understand.

To not let religion rule my every being and stop me from loving and receiving love and it is. Just love. No labels or anything. It was a romance show.

I had only (very scared may I add) watched one other queer media and every time I had watched one it felt like some omnipotent presence (the church or worse my ironically bigoted dad who happens to be black btw) to burst in and yell

HEY! THAT'S GAY!

(it's funny but not at the same time)

For the first time I allowed it to be on the big screen, my tv screen (as god intended) and allowed myself to see love.

I have been working out my identity since graduating high school and am still working the kinks out. I realized even when I was in the midst of hate I ironically had multiple queer couples (lesbians mostly) in my books. Hell my first book that made me decide to be an author has a grumpy and sunshine couple and I was like yep seems right.

I never thought it was wrong but when I'd leave the comfort of my imagination and my world I realized that there was the world burning around me.

I'd seen queer couples in high school and said that made sense, and in college I was hilariously practically adopted by them for a short while in college (what can I say birds of a feather am I right?).

It's finally been to unpack years of assumptions and hate and I'd cried a lot. There were so many parallels and intertwinement of the struggles of black people and queer people, and black queer people.

I cried feeling helpless growing up seeing school marches of kids begging to be helped by the ones who swore to protect them, I cried growing up seeing news of young men being another static and not another valuable life and then I cried when I finally saw the brokenness in ignoring queer voices.

I cried for myself for feeling like I had to do something, for not being permitted to love who I want, think how I want and develop how I want.

And most of all right now I cry for the feeling of helplessness I feel sometimes.

I feel dramatic when I say I felt empty when I saw what Kit had posted on Twitter. I felt the same way when I watched Mismatched when the female character was outed in an angry rant.

I knew what that meant. I knew what it felt like.

I feels like being bare and prostrated and having yourself held up to a blinding light. To be subjugated to an impossible and immovable standard that the "norm" never have to worry about.

Alice had stated everyone was queer so I also assumed that that's what he probably was. I also think I heard myself in him when he said partner doesn't matter and it's not a big deal.

I say that everytime I talk to my mom or my family.

I want to have a partner that understands me (the subtext is always in bright red PROBABLY NOT STRAIGHT MOM). She now says she just wants me to be happy. 😊

So I accepted it.

I thought everyone did.

I didn't understand why just because he was seen filming or dating a girl (I don't quite remember) meant he had to be faking it. Newsflash he's an actor first of all.

When straight actors have crossdressed and made fun of queer people or even portrayed them in the however long of stardom they never get the same treatment. They get the how brave, how amazing. WOW! He'll even kiss a guy/sarcastic

I was just so hurt and upset. Then all of a sudden there was discourse and I just hated every minute of it.

I've recently been kind of breaking myself away from the celebrity ideal of being turned real life idols/gods to worship that are practically stalked and gawked at. I hate everything about celebrity culture.

Paparazzi=stalker. If it happened to a normal person they'd be in jail. Or at least on a watchlist and shamed probably.

But they've turned people and their lives into the commodity to the public. They've ripped apart the mental health and lives of so many and then go quiet when they break.

It was so unfair.

I feel like it was so unfair.

And I can't help but cry because I know what it feels like to be scared. Everyone probably has at one time.

I have empathy (probably too much honestly) so I tear up when people are hurting.

And I can't help but hurt for him. I can't help but hurt for everyone I see struggling.

I wish the world was better and people were too. I just wish it was all better.

But for Kit in my mind I feel like I probably shouldn't ever meet him because I'll be a sobbing mess so I'll just write this to get it out of my system.

I see you.

I'm sorry it happened like that.

I feel you.

I'm sorry you felt like that.

I'm sorry you had to feel like that. You were young and scared and it felt like the world was surrounding you.

Something so beautiful and private was taken from you. I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry.

I just wish he could hear it.

He also deserves a hug. A very big and warm one.

I'm still crying every time they talk about it in season 2 and it just made me sob every time they practically said it's okay tell us in your own time.

I tell that to myself in private every time I question myself about anything.

I'm so sad such a beautiful thing was taken away. And honestly my brain says he might've come out in a very cheeky way using a line from the show or in a very natural way, or even not at all.

We don't owe each other access to every part of ourselves like the Internet has conditioned is to believe.

Celebrities and us "normal people" alike. We all deserve to love and be loved.

No matter the gender, color, size, identity or anything really.

We're literally the only species that can communicate with each other and all this other weird stuff is quite literally all made up to complicate stuff.

We should love and be happy but I know that's a very idealistic way of thinking.

If you see this Kit (and everyone one else ofc) you are loved no matter where you are from, what you identify as or who you love you are valid and worthy.

You are loved even if you don't love yourself - Cleo Sol

The universe loves you and you were put here for a reason and I am quite frankly glad you are here.

Thank you for reading all this if you have I don't feel comfortable talking about stuff like this in my current circumstances but I want to advocate more.

So here, advocacy.

Love who want! Be queer and loud! Muah

[autisticmosasaur]

I just finished season 2 of heartstopper and it was amazing but honestly I'm so sad now

I have never experienced that amount of joy and support and I just feel so alone

I have never had a friend group like that

I don't think I've ever felt like people actually like me

I just want to be happy with people who enjoy spending time with me

I don't know if anyone will ever really like me

People have called me weird my entire life and I just don't understand what's wrong with me

I want to be in a relationship

I want to feel love

I want to have friends who like me

I don't know how to do anything

My experiences were nothing like the things in heartstopper

I've been out as queer since I was 11 and I've been out as trans since I was 14 and people were fine with it but i still never fit in with anyone

I started realising I was probably autistic about a year ago and I think that's probably why I've never felt like people actually like me

I learned to mask from a very young age because everyone told me there was something wrong with me so I've never felt ok being myself and I'm scared that even now that I know I'm autistic people will still not like me and I'll just be alone forever

Idk how to be

[gra-sonas]

Thanks for everything you’ve done, gra 💕 I hope afterwards we keep hearing updates from you about Tyler and Vlamis, but even if you’d like to stop, I want you to know that your constant work to post and tell us what’s been happening has been invaluable, precious, and often brought a bright light to the darkest moments. I think I can speak for everyone when I say that words cannot express our gratitude. Truly, thank you ❤️

Goodness, I don't even know what to say. 😳

Thank you so much for your kind and very generous words. I am so happy to know that my blog's brightened dark moments for you.

I love what I do, and if any of it is making someone else's day a little better and brighter, that's the most incredible thing I could hope to achieve. ❤️

None of this would've been possible without people like you, though. Commenting and reblogging are art forms on the verge of extinction on Tumblr, that's why I'm so grateful for every reblog, and every interaction with any of my posts.

Again, I love what I do, but it's certainly more fun when you realize you're not just yelling into the void. So, THANK YOU! ❤️

I don't know what the future holds and which fandom will consume me next (bc let's be real, it will happen again *ahem*) but I have no plans to stop posting about Tyler or Vlammy (or some of the other cast members) once S4's aired.

I'll probably add other shows/fandoms to my reblogs more frequently at some point (my drafts are bursting with unpublished Heartstopper reblogs 🙈, for now, I'm doing my best to keep my obsession mostly to myself/on Twitter tho 🤫), but Vlamburn will always hold a special place in my heart, and I'm excited to see what's next for them.

Anywayyyyyy, thank you once again for your lovely message, it definitely brightened my day! 😍🥰

[southbound-in-the-sky]

ON HEARTSTOPPER

Ever since the show's release, there are memes going around on Twitter, with queer people assigning a piece of LGBTQ+ media they grew up with as their Heartstopper. Luckily for me, and for other queer kids and teenagers, my Heartstopper is, well, Heartstopper. 

The comic was first published on Tumblr back in 2016 but the characters of Nick and Charlie were much, much older, appearing in Alice Oseman's debut YA novel Solitaire. I didn't know why and how I stumbled upon Heartstopper, but I have been reading a lot of LGBTQ-themed young adult novels at that point and my then-newfound love of graphic novels was already introduced by N.D. Stevenson's Nimona. It had a lot of things that appealed to me – teenage kids, a sensetive look at queerness, fast-paced plot and dialogue – and so I downloaded it and read it. It was a moment of a lifetime. 

By then, I probably never realized that it was integral to my discovery of my identity. I was only at Volume 1, just a short narrative of Nick and Charlie's friendship until they inevitably kissed at the end. But it made me feel warm and happy. I never really knew exactly when I started reading it. I looked through the downloaded files on my phone and discovered I saved the first volume just a week before my fifteenth birthday. 

At that point, I was starting to come to terms with the fact that I liked girls. I had a crush on this girl a year or so before I started reading Heartstopper, but I never realized what the feeling was until the new school year came. It was terrifying – it kept me up at night, it made me wonder if the signs have been there all along, it made me realize that the fluttering heat in your stomach and the sheer willingness to make your friend happy are not normal experiences of a stone-cold heterosexual.

I found company in books (I was always a massive bookworm). I watched coming-out videos on YouTube. I talked, in some depth, about queerness with my friends. I listened to Hayley Kiyoko, Troye Sivan, King Princess. I had a standard queer realization – cute girl sits next to me, I realize that my identity wasn't I thought it was, I blast Girls Like Girls to myself when I'm alone. 

And Heartstopper showed all of that -- all the messy, confusing, and hopeful parts of queer discovery.

Nick thought he was straight his whole life – until he got sat next to openly gay, anxious Charlie. He took 'Am I Gay?' quizzes in the darkness of his bedroom. Nick struggled to fit in his idea of what queerness is until he managed to find his place and label his identity. 

I admit, I have only recently gotten aware of the parallels between my life and Heartstopper. I just realized how Heartstopper has been pivotal to my own coming-of-age, to my own anxieties about my identity, to my own Nick-like moments of discovering my sexuality. 

Heartstopper transcends beyond the 'boy-meets-boy' narrative that most YA queer novels have, even though the comic is marketed as such. I'm not saying that cute budding gay relationships are not important -- they are and more should be made -- but Heartstopper simply touched on many things and issues that I never anticipated. This was probably the first time I read about a non-white trans girl whose story is not marred by trauma and despair. There is a steady, lesbian couple who, although facing homophobia from peers and classmates, stood strong by each other until the very end. There are accepting teachers and parents and siblings. There is a nuanced discussion about mental health and eating disorders as the comic progresses. There are wholesome, fluffy plotlines -- I do, in fact, think that those are the lifeblood of the comic -- interpersed with realistic, hurtful scenarios, like an abusive closeted boyfriend, school bullies, homophobic family members, and struggles with one's own mental and physical health.

Heartstopper is brilliant, from an objective, comic-making perspective, but it's also emotionally impactful to the people who read it, especially LGBTQ+ children who are still having a difficult time in finding their own place in the world.

For something that tells experiences that are so specific -- Oseman grew up in southeast England, and Heartstopper is set in the same town, schools, and environment -- Heartstopper is massively relatable. I was -- still am -- a teenage kid who moved to a bustling city and studied in a large public high school in the Philippines. The Heartstopper kids studied in same-gendered private grammar schools in a relatively small town in England. Still, Tao's words to Charlie at the beginning of the comic and the show, telling him that Nick is straight and should let go of his hopeless crush on him, mirrored the same speech one of my friends gave to me when I told them of my own hopeless crush on another girl. Despite of the fact that our reasons of changing schools are obviously different, I empathized with Elle and the difficulty she faced in finding friends in a new environment. I found kinship in Nick in regards to working on his sexuality. I felt my feelings echoed when Darcy said she "liked girls a bit more than she's supposed to". Tara's feelings after coming out was painful and heart-achingly relatable. I even found Isaac's (one of the new characters Oseman made for the Netflix adaptation) occassional disinterest hilarious and 'me-coded', as the "kids" on Twitter would say.

Tao spoke to me the most, however. For someone who is the only cisgender and heterosexual member of their immediate friend group, Tao's uneasiness towards change and his brash overprotectiveness over his friends resonated to me a lot.

I think that's part of the beauty and charm of Heartstopper. Sometimes you directly related to one of the characters and the struggles they faced and the happiness they earned, but I personally found bits of myself scattered throughout the comic, the show, and the characters. It's oftentimes funny and, in a few moments, gutting -- I have heard homophobic tirades from older schoolmates against a friend of mine, and I had no idea what to do or what to say. Classic, Catholic homophobia still resides within our school, a different flavor than what was shown in Heartstopper, but still, as usual, brings the same element of hate and incites a wavering feeling of guilt and anger within queer students. Only just recently, I've read a homophobic speech from a batchmate of mine, hidden under the guise of preserving the sanctity of marriage.

Queerness can feel isolating. I have spoken about crushes and attractions on other girls with friends -- I even alluded to those on my own Twitter posts as I had gotten more comfortable -- but I have never really said anything about how alienating it is to be young and Filipino and queer. I'm sure a lot of my friends relate, but these discussions of our intermingling identities are a bit too deep for a bunch of kids who haven't even graduated high school yet. I went on a panic when my father was moments away on discovering that Girls Like Girls was playing on my phone. I felt a deep sense of melancholy as I watched my straight classmates just openly declare their crushes out loud, with no fear of weird stares from onlookers. Just around a year ago, I became withdrawn when a friend mentioned briefly that I liked girls online to complete strangers, when I was still insecure about my identity. And I had no one to talk to about those things.

Heartstopper is one of things that could save people from the feeling of loneliness. Authentic queer media is already so rare, and optimistic, teen-focused narratives are even rarer. It provides a grounded look on what it means to be a part of the LGBTQ+ community, where kids find strength within themselves and amongst their friends. 'Heartstopper' doesn't have a grandiose coming-out-moment with Nick. It doesn't have romantic gestures as big as the Eiffel Tower. It doesn't wallow in gritty events and let the characters be unnecessarily traumatized and hurt. Despite the fact that Heartstopper feels "smaller" than most teenage-oriented media, it still captures the overwhelming feeling of "every little thing is important when you're a teenager". Nick coming out to his mother as bisexual is a quiet and peaceful and loving affair, but it's also freeing and liberating and an important step into his acceptance of himself. Even quaint milkshake triple-dates are crucial events, especially when five out of the six attendees are not completely cis and heterosexual. Queer people being allowed to live silent, tranquil lives is, personally, one of the biggest and powerful statements Heartstopper has to offer.

I'm just idly waiting for the announcement of the season two renewal of 'Heartstopper', rewatching my favorite bits of the show. I am but a simple Heartstopper fan, anyway, and there are people who can provide more impactful analyses and anecdotes about the show and the comic. Still, it's a bit of a relief to talk about these feelings for a while, like I finally let myself exhale for a long, long time. Perhaps I needed a show like Heartstopper to finally accept these emotions within myself, to process the experiences that made me me these past few years.

Heartstopper is not the end-all, be-all beacon of queer representation in media -- it still centers around two British middle-class cis white boys -- but it definitely is a step in the right direction. There are still more stories to mold, to tell, to take flight. Positively speaking, we can only really go up from here -- and I hope those stories become the Heartstopper of other, younger queer kids.

I wrote this months ago (probably obvious because of the "season 2 waiting" bit LMAO since Heartstopper has been renewed for two more seasons) but I think it deserves to be posted!

[littlefirefly42]

Greetings fair traveler! Welcome to my blog! I'm happy to have you, why don't you stay a while?

(If you're looking for my masterlist, it's at the bottom of this post)

About Me!

-You can call me Firefly :)

-I'm genderqueer and I use all pronouns

-This isn't just an agere blog, but I am an age regressor and I do make some agere posts and reblog agere content

-I do swear and reblog mildly nsfw content (such as sexual jokes and objective conversations about the morality of sexuality. Nothing explicit, and zero pornographic art, writing, videos, or photos)

-Ddlg, abdl, and other de-aging kinks are not welcome on my blog. Do not interact if you are going to sexualize or hate on age regression

Requests

I love getting requests!! If you want to request a fic, moodboard, or DNI banner don't be shy! This blog is mainly agere, but I do other stuff too.

The fandoms I work with are:

-MCU/Marvel Comics

-She-Ra

-All Riordanverse fandoms except Kane Chronicles

-The Owl House

-Adventure Time

-Crier's War

-Bee and Puppycat

-The Song of Achilles

-The Outsiders

-Stranger Things

-Gone

-Heartstopper

-Over the Garden Wall

-Don't Hug me I'm Scared

-The Dragon Prince

-Goncharov

-It (movies only, chapter one and two)

-Wednesday

-Hamilton

-Dear Evan Hansen (the book and the musical)

-How to Train Your Dragon (the books and the movies/shows)

-Deadloch

-My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic

Fics

I will only write oneshots, however the length of which can vary and is usually 1000-4000 words.

I will not write:

Incest

Pedophilia

Romantic couples under the age of fourteen

Smut or kink of any kind

Breastfeeding

Padded agere (there's nothing wrong with it but it does attract creeps outside the community)

Pro ED, SH, racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, antiseminism, xenophobia, rape/non-con, fatphobia, or ableism (I will still write these things, but not in a positive light)

Certain characters (you can always send me an ask about which characters in a fandom I will not write)

I will write:

SFW agere

Y/N

Mild to moderate gore (blood, stab/bullet wounds, infections, etc.)

Heavy angst (including the angst tropes listed previously, as long as it is not shown in a positive light)

Major character death

Basically any trope that isn't on the previous list

Moodboards

I will do moodboards for whole fandoms, aesthetics, places, time periods, fictional ships, fictional characters, and (positive or neutral) stereotypes. I can even do moodboards of certain headcanons. If you have a request that isn't listed, just message me, I'll probably do it so long as it is sfw.

DNI Banners

Unlike fic and moodboard requests, I'll do a DNI banner for any character in any fandom, even if it is not listed above. I'll even make one for groups of people. Heck, I'll do one for an object if you want. The default for my banners is "____ Protects this Blog NSFW DNI" If you would like it to say something else let me know.

Don't feel bad if your request (for any of the above categories) is very specific! I love specific requests, they actually make my life so much easier, so don't be shy to specify exactly what you want.

Works

I Ate- CG!Mike/Little!Will>> Warnings: Implied ED; throwing up>> Summary: Will is fussy from hunger and Mike tries his best to help.

Tummy Hurts- CG!Lucas/Little!Max>> Warnings: Throwing up; impure regression>> Summary: Max is on her period and is a little more than fussy, Lucas takes care of her.

Glass- CG!Natasha/Little!Wanda>> Warnings: Panic attack; blood; impure regression>> Summary: While Natasha is out getting groceries, Wanda breaks a glass and slips, and chaos ensues until mama nat comes home to comfort her baby.

Rainy Day- Lumax (LucasxMax)>> Warnings: None. It's all fluff. All of it. There is a bit where a character chokes on popcorn?? Does that count??? They don't die or anything though, they cough it up>> Summary: Lucas and Max get to go on their movie date and vecna can kma.

Never Ever- CG!Wanda/Little!Reader>> Warnings: Abandonment issues; blood; yelling; nightmare; very minor implication that reader was abused at some point>> Summary: Your mommy comforts you after a bad nightmare.

Little Monster-CG!Magnus/Little!Alex>>Warnings: Sensory overload; Impure regression; blood; anxious SH>>Summary: Alex gets sensory overload at a Halloween party and regresses. Magnus takes care of him and they just have some fluffy fall fun

Braids-CG!Eddie/Little!Steve>>Warnings: Cheerio violence>>Summary: Steve can't help but play with Eddie's hair. Who is Eddie to refuse the little prince?

Love, Maxie- Elmax (El x Max)>> Warnings: Mental Breakdown; Self harm; Su!cide (not graphic); vomiting (not ED related); Hurt no comfort>>Summary: When Max's letters stop coming, El realizes she's lost the only person she's ever truly loved

Spiderling- CG!Gwen/Little!Miles>> Warnings: Slight blood, semi-graphic description of minor infection>>Summary: Miles is definitely NOT regressed and he CAN help fight. Except... Gwen and Peter aren't buying it.

25 Days of Agere Moodboards

I hope you enjoy your stay, make sure to eat some sleep and get eight hours of water!

[bluenet13]

5, 4, 3, 2, 1

Rules: post the top 5 works you’re most proud of that you released in 2022 (not necessarily your most popular), your top 4 current WIPs that you’re excited to release in the new year, your top 3 biggest improvements in your writing over the past year, your top 2 resolutions (ways you wish to improve your writing/blog) for the new year, and your number 1 favorite line you’ve written this year!

Thanks @chicgeekgirl89 for the tag!

5 Works

The lightnin' in my heart makes it worth it: My first Rookie story and what I hope is the first of many. Chenford stole my heart and I had the best time writing them. I also love every single character on the show and had a lot of fun writing them ganging up on poor Tim.

Silhouettes with no regrets: Heartstopper is one of my favorite stories and I loved writing a Tarlos fic inspired by the show. I really like the balance it has between my usual angst, emotional moments between the boys and more romance than I've ever written.

A Partner's Always Got Your Back + A Friend's Always Got Your Back: Two fics that could be a first and second chapter of the same fic; hence, why I added them both. This was my first time writing from a perspective other than Tarlos and I had so much fun. I love Nancy and I really enjoyed getting inside her head, and showing her sass, how badass she is, and how good a friend she is to her partner and Carlos.

The Green and Brown of Each Other’s Eyes: This one is also very special and easily one of my favorite fics I've ever written. I loved filling in the blanks of various show moments and showing in my own way the growth and evolution of TK and Carlos' relationship. It has some of my favorite lines ever and I just loved exploring Tarlos and sprinkling little parts of myself within their story.

Surrounded by Love: My father passed away in 2020 and I wrote this fic about TK dealing with the passing of his mother in honor of that storyline and my favorite character, and as a tribute to my father and my own grief. It's very personal and very special and easily my #1 favorite.

4 WIPS

The Courthouse fic: Tarlos, Nancy and Tommy + Owen and Gabriel at court when a bad guy breaks out; what could possibly go wrong? Been working on this one on and off since 2021 and it rarely cooperates. I started working on it last week again and might have figured out how to make it work for a bingo square but we will see.

Domestic Abuse: A NCISLA bingo square where Deeks suspects his neighbor is a victim of domestic abuse. My typical angst with some of my 'humor' in between.

A The Rookie fic of Chenford's first Valentine's Day together since they started dating.

An earthquake fic for my 'Natural Disaster' bingo square that I haven't started. Not sure yet if I want it to be for The Rookie and Chenford, or Lone Star and Tarlos.

3 Biggest Improvements

Better integrating my dialogue with the descriptions of what the characters are doing and what's happening around them.

I used to be very much an introspective writer and I spent a lot of time getting inside character's head and doing descriptions. Now I feel more comfortable writing dialogue and incorporating more characters into my fics.

I used to think I could only write fic for NCISLA and even that was mostly a fluke. I've now written for 8 fandoms and have learned to see I'm a good enough writer in my own way. I see how happy writing makes me and now that, for better or worse, it's probably going to be a part of my life forever.

2 Resolutions

Writing consistently: I wrote 13 fics in 2022. 12 in between January and May, and 1 in December. Enough said lol.

I want to get better at adding humor and romance into my fics. I love whump and angst but want to feel as comfortable writing other emotions and different types of scenes as I do with those two.

1 Favorite Line

From Can You Feel It?

Sitting back down on the chair with a sigh, Carlos grabs TK's hand again and sets it on his chest, over his heart. "Can you feel it?" he asks his ex-boyfriend. "Can you feel it beating for the both of us?"

Tagging @wanna-be-bold @ejzah @ravens-words

[jeanmoreaux]

May I ask, what made Solitaire a 3 star read for you? (I haven't read it, but I'm a big Heartstopper fan!)

hi there! yeah, i���m happy to answer your question!! i think it’s important to mention that it was actually a reread (i put it on the wrong list on my post, but i changed it now). i think i read solitaire for the first time back in 2015 or something. so before heartstopper was even a thing. back then i gave it two stars because i *really* didn’t like it. as a 17 year old i thought the climax and resolution of the story were stupid AND i was *extremely* bitter the story wasn’t what i wanted it to be AND i was actually more intrigued by the side characters than tori. like, i’d rather read about charlie or micheal than her. (in 2016 i got my wish with heartstopper lmao but that’s another story lol).

this time around, i actually liked solitaire much more, and i feel like i have a new found appreciation for it i didn’t have before. it’s a solid debut and i can’t even imagine writing something as competent at age 17! while i was too self-absorbed and ego-centric at 17 to see it, as a 24 year old i get what alice oseman was trying to do with this novel. it makes some great points on teenage angst, identity formation, mental health and human connections from a teenage perspective. still, it definitely reads like a debut of a young author, which is probably why it landed right in that three star spot for me. (just to clarify, three stars, for me, are solid reads that will probably appeal to and be enjoyed by people who like the genre/type of story in general, but they don’t do anything particularly well that stands out to me). in the case of solitaire, the plot is a little bit flimsy and unbelievable towards the end (which is an issue with contemporary settings that go for a realistic feel more so than fantasy ones). in particular the characters’ motivations for certain actions feel a little unbelievable or cliché. a lot of the messaging is also pretty on the nose. the character work also isn’t the best; most of the characters feel a little shallow and flat at times, and i would have love to see a little more nuance in the way their ‘complexity’ was presented and explored. also, if you’re a fan of heartstopper, i don’t think solitaire might necessarily be up your alley. not just because the tone is a little darker since tori is struggling with her mental health and the story is told from her POV, but because the characters feel different to what you might expect after having read heartstopper. the heartstopper characters aren’t in the story much, if at all, and when they appear things are just slightly off. for example, nick and charlie feel more like alternative universe versions of themselves? it’s hard to explain, but they do/say things that feel slightly out of character for them (if you think of them as how they are characterized in the graphic novels). nick has more ‘dude bro’ vibes, charlie is a bit more judgemental. tori, too, is slightly altered from her heartstopper version. for what it counts ben is still the same—a massive piece of shit, maybe even worse than in heartstopper. all that makes sense considering heartstopper only really started to be a thing AFTER solitaire was already out and alice approached the graphic novel with a different tone/message/feel in mind.

like i said, there is nothing massively wrong with the novel, it’s just not oseman’s best work, which i don’t expect from a debut. since solitaire, they had time to hone their craft which is why their new works are better written. and while solitaire makes for a decent debut it’s not as great as it probably could have been. if you’re interested in read it, i would recommend it though!!

[librathefangirl]

My Vidding Year in Review - 2022

To celebrate the new year I wanted to take a look back at my vidding and YouTube statistics for 2022. @LibraTheFangirl

(Continue reading for my personal top 5 videos of 2022 and why)

---

Videos posted: 39.

Fandoms posted:

9-1-1: Lone Star (31 videos).

Voltron: Legendary Defender (3 videos).

Heartstopper - 2 videos.

Nanatsu no Taizai/The Seven Deadly Sins (2 videos).

Zak Storm: Super Pirate (1 video).

Total views (all videos): 509 113.

Most popular new videos:

Tarlos [+3x05] - Everything (29 257 views).

9-1-1: Lone Star - 3x11 Humor 😂 (28 997 views).

Tarlos [+3x04] - Heaven (27 610 views).

Tarlos [+3x03] - Right Here Waiting (26 105 views).

9-1-1: Lone Star - 3x07 Humor 😂 (22 326 views).

Most popular videos (all videos):

Chase Davenport - Don't Let Me Down (35 901 views).

Chase Davenport - Stronger (29 666 views).

Tarlos [+3x05] - Everything (29 257 views).

9-1-1: Lone Star - 3x11 Humor 😂 (28 997 views).

Tarlos [+3x04] - Heaven (27 610 views).

Total likes (all videos): 9 409 likes.

Most liked videos (all videos):

Tarlos [+3x05] - Everything (613 likes).

Tarlos [+3x04] - Heaven (592 likes).

9-1-1: Lone Star - 3x07 Humor 😂 (528 likes).

Tarlos [+3x03] - Right Here Waiting (508 likes).

9-1-1: Lone Star - 3x11 Humor 😂 (500 likes).

Subscribers compared to 2021: +574.

My personal favorite new videos:

Honorable mentions (because I can't just chose five):

Tommy♥Charles - Far Away

Owen & TK & Gwyn [+3x08] - Safe and Sound

TNT [+3x12] - Lean On Me

Top 5 (in order of date):

Tarlos [+3x01] - I can't look away~ Okay, truth to be told, I can't choose my favorite among my episode-centric Tarlos videos. The decision to make one video per season 3 episode was completely spontaneous, and although I didn't manage to complete it, one a really enjoyed. And it all started with this one video! The season 3 premiere and the following episodes especially was so creatively inspiring and I'm really happy with my decision and first video that came from that. I also feel like this was the video were I started to really develop my new personal style of vidding.

9-1-1: Lone Star - 3x07 Humor 😂 Who doesn't love a good humor video? I certainly do. But I never expected to be making so many of them. This video, like the previous one, is both an impulsive decision and the start of a new era. Before this, I hadn't really made a humor video, and now I have plans to make one for each 9-1-1: Lone Star episode. I'm not sure if this is my favorite humor video, but it was the first one. Plus, the episode was so funny to watch and vid.

Tarlos [+3x12] - Du är allt (You Are Everything) I know I just said I couldn't choose a favorite among these videos. But there is something extra special about making a Tarlos video to a song in your mother tongue you grew up listening to. Probably the nostalgia. Either way, I really am happy with how this one turned out. I also really think this song is such a good fit for Tarlos (my video contains English translation of the lyrics in closed caption, for those interested),

Tarlos [s01] - 24 Hours Ah, season 1 Tarlos. Even better, season 1 Tarlos from Carlos' perspective. This is one of my shortest Tarlos videos, but still one of my favorites. I really wanted to focus on Carlos' initial feeling with this one, and I am proud of how well I (in my opinion) manage to portray those. As well as match the lyrics, scenes and quotes together. Also, this was such a pain to edit to get it like I wanted it to look.

Heartstopper (fanmade) Opening Credits Oh, look! It's not only 9-1-1: Lone Star on this list. Although they did make up 79% of my posted videos in 2022, so I guess it's not that surprising. But enough about those. This is another video I'm really happy with the outcome of. Not only is it my first Heartstopper video, which is always a joy, but it's also my all-time favorite opening credits video I've ever made. I did make some more advanced editing choices with this one. I also am quite proud of the way it looks and the tone of the video.

Something I'm especially proud of about my vidding in 2022:

First of, I'm proud I managed to complete and post 39 whole videos this year. That like 3,25 videos a month! Secondly, I really feel like I've developed my own style of editing. Especially regarding my 9-1-1: Lone Star videos. I've always wanted to incorporate more quotes/voice-overs into my videos, but never really felt myself capable to before. Until I started making my 9-1-1: Lone Star season 3 episode-centric videos. I'm also really happy I finally made the decision to move away from my old username (FangirlForever) to something that's a little more personal/me (LibraTheFangirl) as well as a name that I'm using on other sites as well (YouTube, here, ao3).

Goodbye 2022. Hello 2023!