#seems legit jack

[onlydrawnbad]

Do you ever read 570,000+ word, 130+ chapter fanfics that were started nearly 8 years ago and have current year updates, and as you get to the end of certain chapters along the way, you keep going "wow, I would have hated to be here in 201x and have to wait for THAT cliffhanger, those poor readers, those sad, desperate historical souls" and you're just so glad for yourself because you know you don't have to stop until chapter 139, and you arrogantly assume that's probably just extended epilogues or something (because you were previously conditioned by another fic to believe that), so everything will be fine?

Only to get to chapter 139 and SCREAM OUT LOUD because you jinxed yourself right into THE NEWEST WAVE OF CLIMATIC PLOT CHAPTERS WHERE ALL THE SHIT IS GOING DOWN and now you, too, have become the reader you felt such pity for?

Wait, you don't?

THEN GO OVER THERE AND DO WHAT I DID SO I DON'T HAVE TO BE ALONE IN MY HUBRIS. It comes with art. So. Much. Wonderful. Comic. Art.

I would like to stress (as I have done before) that I have never played this game. Not once. I had never even heard of it originally. Yet this is now the second absolutely massive Sans x reader/OC fic I have read in this fandom. Everything I know about Undertale, I learned because one day on a whim I decided to read a 480,000+ word, 170+ chapter fanfic because I liked the way @tricktster used words on some tumblr post (don't ask me which one, I've forgotten). I have re-read that fic at least once a year, if not more, for multiple years in a row because it's like a favorite book to me now.

If anyone needs me, I'll be comfort-reading it, again.

And then probably going back and re-reading JoAT, because oh my god that fic. I'm just so in love with it for a million reasons.

(Yes, it took me this long to see there was another glorious treasure in plain sight under @capnhanbers despite following @mod2amaryllis and it's just really embarrassing to be confronted by that kind of obliviousness, okay? Can I blame it on how, multiple times now over the years, I've gone months and months without looking at this app unless it notified me of something specific?)

I swear, I have never read fic in any other fandom where it was this easy to immerse myself in it with nothing more than some light googling along the way (the first time with CoBC), and the googling was just because I'm me and I like to know all the things. In both cases, you don't have to come to the table with anything other than an interest in supernatural-elements stories (monsters, magic, etc) and a love for snappy dialogue and funny (dad) jokes and HEART-WRENCHING FEELS and watching the author having a life journey in the notes.

(And yes, sure, an open mind about a skeleton monster and a human having magical sex, but if you know you're in a rated fic about monsters and humans, you must know that's going to be a thing.)

[kajira-kreations]

Seriously, we were robbed of a Halloween episode for Transformers Prime!

Happy Halloween, everyone!

[daveyaps]

hi tumblr

(i'll probs post sum of my older art l8r 2day!!!! this is jus a hi post)

[mokeonn]

Currently I have so many bg3 saves bc I refuse to delete my old ones that will likely never be finished (first ever gameplays, not optimized, everytime I open one I get overwhelmed and stop), but also because I keep making new games with the specific purpose of romancing a certain companion, seeing special dialog, doing a specific style of run, or getting an achievement on steam.

[nexus-nebulae]

found my ancient mp3 player recently. finally found a charger for it and plugged it in. and remembered i found a yt playlist of the whole httyd movie chopped up into like 20 videos and i downloaded the mp3s of all of them to listen to on the school bus. which is why i can effortlessly quote the whole first movie now

[sonicman66]

It happened agaaaaaain

Dpxdc (mostly batman but y'all know the drill)

Danny reveal goes bad, as it sometimes does. Your decision if its a Permanent or Temporary bad result, but either way he takes off and ends up in Gotham. In the midst of getting himself settled (finalizing his new identity if he has one, pulling his emergency funds, etc.) he looks for a job, something that won't look Too Deeply into this malnourished teen with Iffy papers, no references, clearly not a local applying.

And finds work under one Oswald C. Cobblepot, who takes pity on the lad and gives him a job. Kid is either too young to mix drinks or doesn't know how, he's a bit too raggedy to be a waiter or a server, and pity doesn't mean he trusts the kid enough to let him do any of the important work, and the kid does not seem suitable for hench work. So he makes him the janitor.

The Bats catch word that Cobblepot has a new employee, and naturally they get curious, even if Penguin is on a legit streak or not, bc the new hire has obviously faked papers.

Meanwhile Penguin is happy as a clam. The new kid is great at his job, leaves the place lookin spotless, and doesn't ask any questions about suspicious stains or weird trash (besides 'where's the bleach' and 'is this hazmat or just garbage?')

Until one day, in the middle of his cleaning, Danny walks into a previously spotless room to find it slightly messed, with a shadowed figure hunching over a computer, clearly looking through files.

At this point i can't decide which way to take this is funnier.

A: Danny walks up and knocks the intruder unconscious. Calls his boss up and asks what the protocol is for a knocked out Batman in the records room.

B: Danny just huffs from the doorway. 'Dude. Seriously? I just cleaned this place.' The Bat doesn't startle, but Danny does find himself staring at the business of a batarang with Batman looming over him. Gets an impromptu interrogation like 'Why are you working for the Penguin?' 'Because he pays in cash, which i require for goods and services?' 'What do you know about his operations?' 'Jack shit, i'm a janitor.'

Or C: Batman stares at Danny. Danny stares at Batman. Danny scowls. 'I'm going to shut this door. When I come back in five minutes, this room better be as clean as it was before you came in. Got it?' Then steps out without waiting for a response. Heads out, calls Oswald and asks what the protocol is for encountering a Bat or Bird on the premises.

[multi-fandomedfreak]

Creepypasta - Kissing headcanons

Authors note: Severly dehydrated of Creepypasta content. The pastas in this  are Toby, EJ, and Jeff

⚠WARNINGS⚠: Mentions of blood, scars, and sharp objects

🪓Ticci Toby🪓

-The DEFINITION of awkward

-During the beginning of the relationship anyway. He just got so flustered and red in the face no matter where you kissed him. 

-It legit made him go like: 🧍 without fail

-He used to rarely be the one to initiate kisses but after a while, he didn’t hesitate to kiss you but isn’t too keen on doing it in front of the other pastas. He isn’t a big fan of PDA

-He loves to kiss you on your cheek, your forehead, your temples. Usually doesn’t kiss you on the lips because it flusters him too much but never complains when you’re the one to start it

-He’s definitely the kind of guy to not like PDA but lovess making out when the both of you are alone

-He MELTS when you kiss around his scars and whisper about how beautiful he is. You do this and he’s all over you

-Loves giving neck kisses but isn’t a fan of hickeys 

-His hands are always cupping your face whenever you two kiss, it just seems right to him definitely not because he likes to squeeze your cheeks

🕳Eyeless Jack🕳

-A little less awkward than Toby because he’s been a relationship before (before the whole sacrifice thing)

-Doesn’t like kissing in front of the other pastas due to it meaning he has to lift and/or take off his mask so he’d rather do it in private

-Doesn’t mean he minds PDA. So you gladly kiss his hands whenever you can

-He specifically likes it when you kiss his hands because he hates his claws with a passion, so seeing you lovingly and gently kiss his hands almost brings him to tears 

-When you both are alone he’s much more confident and usually is the one to initiate the makeout sessions

-Gets a little handsy but not really, like the most he’ll do is put his hands on your thighs and waist but nothing more

-Oh and since he has sharp teeth/fangs, will absolutely lose it when you swipe your tongue across his teeth

-Try not to cut your tongue tho

🔪 Jeff the Killer 🔪

-Not awkward at all, he could care less if the other pastas are watching, he’ll kiss you without warning

-Like the little gremlin he is, he’ll make eye contact with the other pastas as he kisses your neck

-Buuut if you were to ever show him like, really fluffy affection, that’s where he gets embarrassed

-Will literally push you away as he’s blushing

-Maybe stab you if you start teasing him about it but no worries, you can take it (plus he never actually stabs you in any fatal places)

-kissing in private tho?

-This man WILL NOT take his hands off of you

-His hands are EVERYWHERE, literally no part of you is safe from his touch; you’re thighs, your butt, your waist everything

-Probably likes to have you on his lap as you two are making out

[silvertonguespoon]

do normal ppl make out while watching samurai jack

[speakeasier]

ME, ACTUALLY FUCKING LAUGHING AT THIS. LEGIT ACTUAL BLESSED IMAGERY, THE MOST HOLIEST THING I’VE SEEN. MIRACLES. EXCEPT THERE’S AN ACTUAL SHIT STAIN RIGHT NEXT TO THE BLESSINGS.

[ma1dita]

kiss his face with an uppercut

smutty part 2 here-> heavy hitter

words: 4k

summary: james potter is so attractive you could beat him to death with a bludger. james potter x fem!beater!reader not from gryffindor (for the plot!!)

warnings: none! james gets physically hurt multiple times by reader, multiple innuendos, enemies to lovers kinda, less serious lovey dove more sexual tension!!! probably not accurate quidditch gameplay

a/n: sorry for the hold up guys this took almost a month of on and off editing lmfao— this whole oneshot makes me think of the filipino word ‘gigil’– simply translating to cuteness aggression; i barely know jack shit about sports much less quidditch but this concept had me looking up quidditch rules to be able to provide– eat up kids

Y/S- sibling name

Y/H- house

(posted & edited 10/10/23)

—

Oh BROTHER, this guy STINKS! I mean, how has he not gotten walloped at least once during this godforsaken game? You suck your teeth at the sight of James flying around the pitch blowing kisses to his fan club and Lily Evans, who turns her nose up at the sight of him.

Merlin, when will this game end?

The Hogwarts Quidditch Semi-Finals of 1977 was a game to watch… until both teams stopped scoring what seemed like hours ago. Both Gryffindor & (Y/H) were at a stalemate, down some players due to injury and now, even lower team morale. Gryffindor team captain and chaser James Potter, notorious Marauder, and resident flirt, is not someone who likes to lose. He’s spent all season drilling his teammates, memorizing plays, and thinking of every outcome possible to ensure another Gryffindor victory. James’ affinity to be right takes precedence over anything, after all. But after beating down almost all of (Y/H)’s reserves, James was almost vibrating with confidence. He really doesn’t lose, not if he can help it.

“AND ANOTHER (Y/H) IS DOWN WITH AN INJURY— Team captain Whithall calls for a timeout as they reconvene on what to do next! Hope you’re still comfy in the stands, folks….” the student announcer grumbles.

There’s absolute chaos on the field, and like birds scuffling over a piece of bread, (Y/S), the team’s last good beater is floating on a gurney, ready to be transported to the Hospital Wing.

“Oh, here comes trouble…” Sirius murmurs, smacking James on the back to grab his attention.

You jump down from the stands to check on (Y/S), and James is too busy reveling in the idea of winning the goddamn semi-finals that he doesn’t notice you putting Quidditch gear on.

“Easy win from here on out, Pads! The little lady’s just checking the damage. Not important,” he chortles before Sirius physically grabs his head to face the girl walking towards him, currently storming across the turf to meet him and his team.

“I’m subbing in,” you say, angry at how dirty Gryffindor’s been playing, and angry that you even have to play in (Y/S)’s stead.

“Sweetheart, this game is for serious, you know that right?” James says a bit dumbly with a furrowed brow. Both of you are head to head, and James sees the twitch in your eye as you cross your arms. Hot air is seeping out of your pores but James’s lip simply quirks up in intrigue. You’re someone he hasn’t noticed before, and the only thing running through his mind besides winning the game is that you’re really pretty. But then again, he’s always found angry women to be attractive, in retrospect.

“Yeah, for the actual cup, not…for Sirius… It’s the wrong time to joke, innit?” Sirius says to break the ice, noticing the palpable tension between your glares. Your faces are inches away from each other and he’s not sure if you two are going to fight or kiss, but it makes him grimace all the same.

“Who do you think (Y/S) practices with? Unlike you and your friends, I know when to take things seriously,” You say through gritted teeth.

“She’s legit, Potter. Got added to our reserves last week.” Whithall pipes up, ready to get back to the game. The crowd has been weathered down after hours of anticipation, and they want to see the end of it, no matter the outcome.

“Much to my surprise,” you grumble, elbowing the authority in the form of a teenage boy not much older than yourself. You should’ve known your sibling was looking a little too happy as they got floated off the pitch on a gurney.

“Then let’s play. Don’t hurt yourself, sweetheart.” James says condescendingly, floating away on his broomstick like it’s a walk in the park, but the way you’re slapping the bat against your palm is getting Sirius a tiny bit nervous for his precious countenance. The whistle blows and the game resumes.

“A SURPRISE ADDITION (Y/N) JOINS HER HOUSE AS BEATER! Gryffindor better watch out for her swi—” You slam the bludger in James’s direction and it hurtles toward him so fast that he almost folds in half, barrel-rolling on his broom to dodge it. The move makes Sirius and a few of their other teammates gasp to see James scrambling back onto his broom.

“Oops! Looks like I missed.” you deadpan, balancing midair as you whack another one where it rebounds off the Gryffindor seeker and back towards James, hitting both of them in the gut.

“THIS GIRL’S GOT AN ARM ON HER! Though might I say her hits look a bit targeted…” The commentator says worriedly, and everyone in the crowd is leaning in their seats trying to get a better view.

“Merlin, are you trying to kill me woman?” he yells in outrage.

“I’m trying to finish the game. Your big head is in the way,” you say with a straight face as Sirius bats towards you, and you spin on your broomstick without shifting your posture. The smile on your face as you taunt him should be considered criminal, but he’s looking at you in a new light.

Yeah, now he’s paying attention. The other Gryffindor players can’t seem to figure out your next move and you bat another bludger towards Potter’s extremely large target of a head, and all of a sudden he’s freefalling through the air as his teammates fly to catch him, one by one. His nose still makes impact with the ground before Sirius catches by the ankle like Achilles taking a dip in the River Styx.

“AND (Y/H) HAS CAPTURED THE SNITCH! Good job to their Seeker, Appleby! Congratulations on a job well done, so that we can all finally go home.” The commentator cringes as McGonagall swats at him to leave the podium.

Who even is she, taking over the game and stealing his win like that?

He’s walking up from the sidelines with a bloody nose, going to shake Whithall’s hand and you’re standing behind him, a malicious grin plastered between your rosy cheeks, windswept and almost ethereal while he looks like he got flattened by a hippogriff. Fuck, she’s pretty. You look like you floated down from the heavens, and by the looks his team gives him, he may have just crawled out of the earth.

“Congrats,” he grumbles, turning to you. Really pretty. It’s even worse that you’re devastatingly stunning up close— with sweat glistening on your brow and a pearly white smile, he takes a good moment to really look at you and memorize the flutter of your eyelashes. He’s unsure if he’s concussed or maybe it’s his astigmatism, but there are actual stars in his vision as he peers down at you. Your confidence is actually kind of sexy.

“You look…um…you ride well.” He stutters, shaking his head from his personal reverie.

“Excuse me?” you say, your little mouth agape in what he hopes is not disgust. He looks pathetic, blood sopping down to his jersey as he looks at you like he’s only seeing you for the first time, acknowledging you closely. Something about seeing him flail makes you crinkle your nose as you stifle a grin.

“I mean…Um…” Damn.

Sirius pulls his best friend away before you can bite back your laughter, all of your teammates leading you away to celebrate.

“Mate, what the shit was that? Are you alright in the head?” Sirius says, and if James’ nose wasn’t already bleeding he was going to slap him silly.

“Just…Didn’t see that coming…” he mumbles, and his mind, along with all of Gryffindor is in disarray as they walk back to their tower. He’s got a lot of thinking to do on what his next move will be.

—

James Potter goes through life in three methodical ways: 1.) creating a strategy, 2.) making a scene, 3.) and dragging his friends into it— in that particular order, every single time.

Now notice how considering consequences is not part of said process.

His ego wouldn’t let him rest after a girl, much less a very pretty one that he’d never noticed before—beat him at what he does best; quidditch! In fact, the next few nights were void of sleep and filled with thoughts of you. The way your hair looked so soft in the sunlight, how your lip turns almost Gryffindor red when you bite it in concentration, and maybe how your delicate hands would look as they tightly grasp onto his bat...ahem…your quidditch bat. Some dirty delusions aside, if looks could kill, he’d be dead seven times over, but honestly? He’d probably thank you for it.

James’ new mission was to figure you out, and if that was his mission, it meant it was the rest of the Marauders’ too. For the sake of winning the Cup, of course. That’s what he tries to tell himself until his mates catch him ogling you again at breakfast.

“So what is it with you and girls that inflict you nothing but pain and humiliation?” Remus muses, as the Marauders watch James laugh at a joke you told your friends at the (Y/H) table across the Great Hall. He looks at you like someone who stares at the sun, squinting and burning himself as he ponders on why he’s unable to look away.

James fumbles a response, shoving Remus as they all laugh. “Listen, I’ve got a bit of a masochistic streak, Moony. Just…There’s something about her…”

Your friends are pointing at him now, and as you turn to meet his eyes, you lift a brow inquisitively and flip him off. Sirius’s face pulls up in shock at James’s growing smile at the interaction as he mumbles, “Maybe you’ve met your match, Prongs…”

The boy pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose, anything to try to see you clearer as he leans over to put his head in his hands, sighing dreamily. His friends are not as easily amused.

“A match made in heaven, you reckon?”

—

“Match made in hell, more like!” You spit, almost choking on your scrambled eggs at your friends’ insinuations. Your back is as stiff as a board, shoulders tight at the notion of you ever liking James Potter triggering your fight or flight response. When it comes to someone as pompous as him, only the word fight comes to mind.

“Oh come on, love… He’s popular, funny, and quite handsome…It’s James freaking Potter we’re talking about!” your roommate gushes, but you're not the least bit impressed.

“Is that supposed to do anything for me? I can think of a few F words that middle initial can stand for…” Eyes rolling, you peek back at the Gryffindor table to see said boy wiggling his fingers at you teasingly until he accidentally smacks Peter in the face with his toast. Idiot.

“Only hot people get away with stupid shit. I mean look at the four of them!” you continue, gulping down the rest of your coffee. “Potter’s the worst out of all of them though. Big ass head must compensate for a lot of things." You say, shaking your head at your friends.

"And yet, here you are, talking about him for the fourth time this morning," your roommate replies, smirking. " You’ve been Potter crazy since you helped us beat Gryffindor in the semi-finals! Are you sure you don't have a crush on him?"

"No!" you say too quickly, too loudly, that the shrill noise of your voice makes your ears hurt and the shit-eating grins on your friends’ faces reflect how desperate that came off. You slump onto the table, eyes rolling to the back of your head.

“You wanna kiss him, don’t you?” they tease, and you push away their puckering faces as you scoff, “With an uppercut, maybe!” Almost makes you want to stomp over there and wipe the stupid look off his face…and maybe sit on his lap. You run your fingers through your hair in frustration. All this aggression really needs to go somewhere, but unfortunately, James Potter’s lap is the only destination you have in mind.

“He’s just really punchable. I get so annoyed by the sight of him I just want to… ugh!” you groan, your hands shaking as you try to convince them (or yourself). Your friends cackle at the sight of you pretending to squeeze his curly-topped, mothball-filled head, but your brain changes course and you imagine what it’s like to hold his hand. Your fingers flex cautiously at the idea, wondering what his touch would feel like. Grabbing a glass of water to cool your thoughts, your peripherals reveal he’s still staring at you like you make night turn into day. His gaze is searing, and as you put your lips around your straw, he licks his lips slowly. Shit.

—

Availability bias is one hell of a mindfuck. If only they taught psychology at this magic school, maybe the wizarding world would have way fewer problems and more people would be straightforward and not.. Dead. James decides he can categorize his life now as before you, and after you.

Before you, well… he honestly wasn’t even sure if you were a student at Hogwarts until he saw you marching down the pitch, but now… You’re everywhere. He can spot your voice in a crowded hallway, and who was going to tell him you’ve had three classes with him this whole term? Even down to when he shuts his eyes, he’s convinced his eyelids are branded with the imprint of your silhouette. Every conversation he strikes with you ends with you laughing at him, and he’s unsure if that’s a step up or down from the many boisterous rejections from Lily Evans over the years. He sort of wishes you’d laugh with him, and do a number of other things, (heck he’s got a list of ideas he’s wanked off to), and well… His soul is tightly wound with thoughts of you and Godric, listen to this guy…. maybe the boys were right…. Maybe he really does need to get laid.

It’s funny how fate works, two people who’ve barely interacted in the past six years at Hogwarts are now paired together for a History of Magic essay worth 20% of the term grade. You’re trying to get this done as fast as possible, he notices, mapping out ideas and trying to discuss how to piece it all together, yet James does everything but that to get you to pay attention to him. He fills your head with mundane little questions, asking you what your favorite fruit is to the childhood bedtime story your parents told you as a kid.

“What’s your middle name, Potter?” You muse, finally entertaining him after endless chatter. His eyes trail to the exposed skin of your collarbones as you stretch in your seat, and well… you don’t look as menacing as you always do but did it seriously have to be this question? He scratches the back of his head, silent for the first time in the two hours you’ve been trying to craft this essay for the sake of both your grades.

“What? I can’t just go around calling you James Fucking Potter. Spit it out, you know too much about me already.”

He clears his throat, a blush creeping up his neck. “It’s… that’s an intimate question, love… I…”

Your laughter at his response makes his senses shut down. “Oh, so it’s bad. What is it, Franklin? Fabio? Come on, I won’t bite.” A part of him wishes you would, your face equally flushed and so close to him right now, almost leering at him for an answer. It’d be easy to just lean over…

“Fleamont.”

Your lips quirk, until they pucker like you’ve guzzled a lemon. The blush on your cheeks intensifies, and the sound explodes out of you. You laugh so loudly Madam Pince kicks you both out of the library, James carrying both your knapsacks, a hand around your waist as you rush out of there. Your body is firm under his touch, pupils unfocused and dilated looking at him now that you know his dirty little secret. James thinks that if you keep looking at him like that, hell, you can call him anything you want.

—

Fleamont.

What a prick. A really attractive, clueless prick. The memory makes you giggle as you get ready for the Quidditch Cup and your team charges out onto the field to face Gryffindor again, as you’ve both advanced to the finals. He’s not as much of an asshole as you originally thought. It’s undeniable that something pulls you towards him, whether it be hormones, concern, or the fact that it’s actually adorable the way he writes his mother back weekly, or admirable how he moved Sirius out of Black Manor himself last year. Maybe it’s endearing the way he goes out of his way to make first-years smile or heartwarming how even Filch can’t find reasons to hate him. The golden boy. You get it now, why people get trapped in his web, and why many are unwilling to leave.

You pass him outside the locker rooms, bumping shoulders as he smiles almost bashfully. The golden boy, loudmouth, ball of energy is reduced to a nervous pile of teenage ineptness at the sight of you, every time. You could take him (not in a fight). In an actual fight, maybe you could land a few solid hits before his nice muscly arms hold you do—

“Ready to finish this, darling?”

Your eyes refocus when his hand nudges the small of your back, right above your hip. “Mhmm,” you clear your throat, “Ready to lose, Potter?”

“Wouldn’t dream of it.” He moves closer, slowly backing you into the wall.

“Eyes on the prize Potter, I’m in this to win it.” You say, looking at the closing distance between both your chests. James nods, not taking his eyes off of you for a moment, even when the announcer calls out the imminent start of the game.

“WELCOME TO THE HOGWARTS QUIDDITCH CUP OF 1977 GRYFFINDOR VS. (Y/H)! I hope you are all excited as our last match between these teams was quite thrilling at the end of it!” The announcer says, hyping up the roaring crowd as your teams parade onto the pitch.

His eyes are still on you when he shakes Whithall’s hand and the whistle blows. It’s intense, and makes you feel like you’re burning, even if the wind is blowing like crazy today. You bat the bludgers toward anything red on the field that even dares to move toward your teammates. James won’t stop staring at you, and you both lock eyes across the pitch.

“What? Flirt with me later, Potter, I’m trying to win!” you yell.

He’s got you transfixed, and it’s crazy how his timing is always wrong. You bat the bludger away from your captain but don’t notice James flying towards you to respond as you give it your hardest swing, making the impact against his huge target of a head all the more painful.

Holy shit, did you kill him?

He keels off his broom like a shot bird and then he’s falling, and you’re the one chasing the Gryffindor chaser as he flaps his arms like the idiot you know he is as you push forward to catch him before he splits his skull open.

“I’msofuckingsorryJamesareyouokay?” You blurt out as you land, soft hands moving over his broad chest and quickly swelling face. He’s wearing that stupid grin again, and you think you may have finally broken Gryffindor’s team captain.

“You know my name?” he sighs happily, comfortable in your lap and maybe it’s the brain damage you’ve caused him or the way his glasses are bent beyond repair but you will every magical predecessor you can think of to stop you from punching him in the face right now.

“Are you fucking dense?” You scream, shaking your head, and jostling him as his arms try to reach out to swipe the hair away from your face.

“Must’ve hit him so hard you knocked his filter loose..” Sirius muses after he lands next to you two on the grass.

“POTTER’S TAKEN A HIT FROM (Y/H) and it doesn’t look good ladies and gents! Gryffindor calls a timeout to check on their captain!” The announcer calls out, and there are so many eyes on the two of you as James is simply giggling like a prepubescent schoolboy. Fuck, you’ve maimed the golden boy.

“Y’know, sweetheart. You’re…really sexy when you’re on top of me like this,” he says breathily, and you really can’t hit him, so you jab Sirius in the gut instead when he tries to laugh at his best friend’s stupidity.

—

James wakes up in the hospital wing with a blinding headache until someone gently pulls the curtains closed, stroking the hair off his sweaty forehead.

“Poppy you always take such good care of me…” he mumbles. A punch lands on his chest and his eyes rip open, not expecting to see you at his bedside.

“Idiot,” you mutter. “You’re always in my way and now look, you almost got yourself killed and it would’ve been my fault! How dare you, James…” The red is crawling up your neck like a brushfire as you berate him, and he takes it with a grin as you jabber on, putting his arms behind his head.

“Were you worried about me, love?” James smiles cheesily, catching your arm at its half-hearted attempt to slap him across the face.

“I was not. Stubborn people like you are hard to kill. I’m more annoyed that I can’t morally punch your face in since you have a concussion. Madame Pomfrey’s already healed your cheekbone.”

“That you broke,” he says matter-of-factly, taking a chance to kiss the palm of your hand. This concussion is working like a bottle of Felix Felicis. It’s endearing to see you taking care of him, whether you like it or not (even with the punches he’s sure it’ll come with).

“You’re sick in the head.”

“For you. I was trying to come tell you that I never took my eyes off the prize, but then of course you bludgeoned my face in before I could get sweet on yo—”

Your lips crash down on his, and nothing about it is delicate. It’s a month’s worth of yearning, imaginations coming to fruition as he grabs the back of your head to deepen the embrace. Your lips on his are hot and heady, and he could be easily convinced that he’s stuck there, cauterized to the shape of you.

“I know. I could feel you watching.” You breathe into his mouth, leaning up on his chest. His lips chase up again to meet yours, biting down on your bottom lip as you groan. He might like that noise better than the sound of your laughter. It’ll be fun to find out.

“Who won the Cup?”

Laughter spills out of your red, kiss-swollen lips as you pat his cheek gently, fingers grazing over his healed cheekbone.

“Not Gryffindor. But listen closely James, if you be a good boy and get past this concussion, I’ll make up for it by showing you how well I ride…”

He likes the sound of that, Quidditch Cup be damned. You see, James Potter never loses, ladies and gentlemen, not really—and well... there’s always next year.

—

“I like the way

you look at me

like you are

going to talk to me

or devour me

and I am fine with either.”

-N.R. Hart

taglist: @jsjcue

[twstfanblog]

*~Period Drama~* Romance Era Savanaclaw

|| Heartslabyul || Savanaclaw || Octavinelle || Scarabia || Pomefiore + Ignihyde || Diasomnia ||

It started off as a normal afternoon. You and your boyfriend just laid down for an impromptu nap, cuddled close together and safe in each other's arms. So you can imagine their surprise when they wake up to find the bed spotted with blood. Pulling the blankets back, they see the blood coming from you...

FIRST REACTION

Leona

Woke you up whipping the covers off of you. Manhandles you to check where the blood is coming from.

You better talk loud and fast, because once he sees you're bleeding out of your pussy he's hauling you to the infirmary.

Explaining is a 50/50 on how quickly he believes you. The Sunset Savanah values women very highly so female anatomy is heavily researched and he has NEVER heard of this bullshit before.

You're gonna need to debate with him for a WHILE. But he will at some point accept this is...something that's happening.

Ruggie

Woke you up with his manhandling. Smelled the blood and freaked out before even waking you up. Once he realized he wasn't the one bleeding he checked you over.

Tries to take you to the infirmary. He will use his brittle bones and drag your ass if you say you didn't need to go.

Once you explained he legit asks 'So...You're not pregnant?' Refuses to answer when you ask what the fuck he means by that

Clearly concerned, but he also offers to wash the sheets since they've already got blood on them.

Jack

WOKE YOU UP BY FLINGING YOU ONTO HIS SHOULDER.

He woke up smelling the blood before he fully registered what he was even smelling. Working fully on instinct and just wants to get you to the infirmary as soon as possible.

Finally snaps back like halfway through the woods. Asks a lot of questions and doesn't put you down until prompted.

Lowkey embarrassed he freaked out so bad but like...you're bleeding are you SURE you don't need the infirmary-

HOW HELPFUL ARE THEY?

Leona

Lowkey he stays the fuck away in the weirdest way.

You never really see him until you're craving something or it's mealtime. He brings you lunch personally, stares at you until you've eaten it.

Has Ruggie under instruction that your orders come before his for the time being. Yes Ruggie uses this as a reason to slack off until Leona realizes

You know how cats will lay on you and give healing energy when you're sick? Yeah, he's like that. Only he weighs a fucking ton and he's got a resting bitch face that's only been getting worse because he HATES smelling your blood.

The rumbles he makes for you feel SO GOOD, though. While he's slacking in other avenues of helping, he is so soft and tender, making sure you're cozy and fed.

Worst one to deal with PMS mood swings. I can't even pinpoint why, he just seems like no matter how he answers it'll piss you off more.

Ruggie

Leona who???? Ruggie Bucchi has only served one master in his life and it is you.

Hyena brain kicked into overdrive at some point and now he's fully evolved into his final form of doting househusband, without the house and without the ring.

Makes sure you're eating three good meals a day. He doesn't even care if it's just junk food cravings. So long as you're eating he doesn't care.

This boy has gotten your laundry on lock. Clean sheets every morning and a warm towel to lay on at night, not a speck of blood stains in sight. Your comfort is his mission.

Actually comes through with the home remedies for pain relief.

Lowkey kinda scared of you if you get mood swings. Very 'agrees with you to save his life' type.

He's become so submissive, won't look you in the eyes. Hold him, please. Legit still thinks you're in active labor and freaking out over a baby that doesn't exist.

Jack

He's trained for this...not really. But damn is he good at taking care of you.

Jack's a graduated student of Vil's Live, Breath, Grind mindset. He knows how to keep you alive and even thriving. You just gotta...get up.

He tries so hard to keep you on your normal schedule but he can also see that some days you literally don't want to leave the bed and he will lay down and just hold you.

The blood is MADDENING. He will do your laundry regularly, just to escape the blood smell for a few hours.

Resource guarding, but for you. Ace trying to steal a singluar fry at lunch? growl..., Epel slapped you on the arm? Growl. Deuce standing too close??? GROWL.

Lowkey acts like a manservant who will tell you that maybe you wouldn't feel like shit if you ate properly and actually did the stretches he told you to do.

Backtracks every statement the moment you're angry at him.

AFTER THE FACT

Leona

Don't do that...ever again. The fuck you mean you HAVE TO??

Literally annoyed that periods are the 'normal' for you. Not annoyed at the fact you get them, but just that you have to be in pain every month and it fucks up your moods. And that fucks up his naps.

Lowkey everyone who can't smell the blood knows you're on your period because Leona is a cranky bastard to everyone else while you're on it.

Actually heavily invests on natural pain remedies from the Sunset Savana for your next period so that you don't have to take so many potions

He figures out the hormone cycle once he starts to really focus on your scent and how it starts changing like a week or so before your period starts. Has a mental countdown to keep track and will disappear to prep like a day before you get it.

Ruggie

That was fucking AWFUL.

Has resigned to the fact this is gonna happen again and just kinda sighed and thought about his life for an hour or two.

Then comes back all smiles and is finally acting like his normal self again.

He is mentally reviewing EVERYTHING that happened so that when your period hits again he's even better at taking care of you.

Doesn't try to track your period but is able to learn the signs of it coming after a few months.

Jack

Literally checked out an anatomy book from the library, it isn't helpful.

States he's not too worried for the next period, you both managed to survive this one just fine.

Is using a small amount of his free time to research natural pain relief, exercises that can ease muscle cramps, foods that will help boost energy.

No, this isn't for your period, this is just general knowledge he'd need as an athlete.

Weirdly, syncs up with you??? If your period starts, he gets easily agitated before mellowing out after like a day.

HOW HELPFUL ARE THEY? ♡NSFW♡

Leona

Still makes you do most of the work. Pillow princess ass.

Willing to let you use him like a sex toy though. You will just be doing most of the work.

Though, when you CAN get him to actively participate, is strangely romantic with it.

Lots of cradled positions and spooning with him kissing on your neck.

Ruggie

I canon four people in the Twist boy line up as being fully prepared to suck the period out of you.

Ruggie is one of them.

Just give him the okay and he's down there to give you the best damn orgasm of your LIFE.

While the blood is distressing to smell, he finds giving oral on your period to be kind of a vibe.

Jack

Takes the LONGEST time to be convinced that having sex on your period is normal and what you actually want.

He can understand that your period fucks up your hormones and he legit brings in the concept of consent when you're in 'such a state'.

You do eventually have period sex, but it takes you having at least another period before he's fully convinced that you're consenting and not locked in some weird 'Mating Brain' state.

From there he is rocking your world in the name of pain relief.

[vonlycaonwife]

Hi-hiii, I saw your requests open, so I am here to beg for some poly content!

Can I get a Cunning Hares x proxy!reader polyamorous relationship, please?

Idc if it's oneshot, headcannons, small pieces on each of the members, idc if it's sfw or nsfw

I'm desperate, I'll take anything, please😭🙏

Okay legit I had a double take seeing this, cause I swear I never saw this in my inbox until rechecking I wrote down all the ones I accepted. But! I felt I had to do this because it would be super cute, though they mainly give me found family vibes.

Warnings: none

Okay to be honest, you most likely would have to wear the pants in this relationship.

I can imagine you being the groups budgeter, but the position more so just…fell onto your lap then you actually putting yourself there.

Though also since Phaethon seems to be the hares usual proxy, I’m imagining you only get called to help when the siblings are too busy.

But that’s not to say they don’t appreciate you! They very much do and spoil you in their own ways.

Like Billy always being the one to cheer you up when upset, Anby being your go to bodyguard if needed, Nicole (trying) to be your sugar gf (though she ends up being the sugar baby most of the time), and Nekomata being a jack of all traits.

Actually speaking of Neko, I feel like it took some time before she was introduced into the poly. Mainly because she was unsure how she truly felt, but you four still accepted her with open arms!

Normally a lot of people confuse you guys as a friend group, which leads to some funny scenarios of someone hitting on one or two of your relationship and being confused when the rest speak at once saying, “They’re taken by us!”

Honestly they’re just a bunch of goofballs.

But they’re your goofballs.

[kalims]

kiss your best friend | savanaclaw

kiss your best friend and see how they react!

parts. one, two, three, four, five, six, seven

characters. leona, ruggie, jack.

includes. gn reader who can be seen as either yuu or another alternative universe.

cw. kissing? mutual pining, crack.

note. my life is legit depressing and I'm still out here posting 🤞

leona kingscholar

is immediately awake when he feels the peck on his lips, and the accompanied lingering scent he can't seem to forget. did you think he was asleep?

holds this above your head for the longest time. oh prefect.. how could you kiss someone who couldn't have been aware of what you've done? it would've been messy if he was actually asleep and never witnessed this.

if you try to run away out of embarrassment he's not gonna let you, by the way. you gotta own up to your actions, no point in being a coward..

huffs silently at the audacity but his ears are obviously twitching in delight. as if to further non-verbally tell you that he's secretly happy you're not sure that even he is aware of the tail tangling around your limb.

does not let go, ever.

"remember when you kissed me when I was 'asleep'?'" "stop."

ruggie bucchi

torn between being mortified and confused.

mortified because his best friend kissed him, and confused because his best friend kissed him. honestly his feelings are 100% understandable because I'd be a ruggie too if this happened to be.

looks way too cheeky for someone who considers himself to be 'torn between mortified'. plus.. he laughed so you can't label him in that kind of spectrum.

to be honest only his close family actually had kissed him but it was only on the cheek so you bet he's a little.. curious? it was practically only a half second thing but he can't tell why he's feeling hungry again.. didn't be just eat a while ago?

"ahh... can you do that again? gotta make sure to rub it in leona's face."

"ruggie what."

"what? it's only a few times I get to have something he doesn't."

jack howl

never skipped leg day.

wait that doesn't have any relation to the post.. anyways jack in comparison, is actually the most flustered and bewildered out of everyone here. kinda ironic since he's definitely the.. buffiest?

you'd expect him to be a little indifferent which only is shown in his expression. struggling to keep his face straight and slowly turning pink despite the flabbergasted look on his face.

for reference: (ㆆ_ㆆ)

"you do know we're best friends.. right?"

"I thought we were dating." you joke.

"... we are?"

you forever scarred him.. were you guys actually dating this whole time?

[tanglepelt]

Dc x dp idea 84

Jack and Maddie are legit crazy mad scientist.

They moved to amity before jazz was born. Prior to the justice league. Those who didn’t comply when the moved were swiftly taken care of.

All outside new sources come from them amity has only seen what the fentons want.

The Giw were hired by the Fentons. Both are bad. But who would the town rather deal with the shoot first supposed government. Or the wacky Fenton parents.

And how many parents can exactly actively stake out a school. How many times had they been inside the school during the school day.

That is until mr lancer comes into play. Somehow he managed to slip by and entered the town this year. Earning a position of vice principal right under their noses.

He actively promotes Danny doing better. Actually forcing him to do his work and learn.

He takes notes of Danny’s declining health. Falling asleep in class, the bruises and reports the fentons. Only for nothing to happen.

Lancer then takes notes of the eccentric actions of the fentons. The screaming of tearing the ghosts apart. He knows about the truth of the outside world. He knows this would go against the meta human protection acts. So he makes a mental note to contact the proper services of the need arises.

After the events of the town being yoinked into the infinite realms. He finally acts. Sending out an email and call to the justice league hotline. Unbeknownst to him both being stopped by the Fenton parents.

Obviously they plan to deal with him when the time is right.

The only reason he stays is because no other adult seems to care about the kids. He was the only one who event attempted to check in on them during the ghost flu.

He can’t stand by any longer when he sees the two Fenton parents hunting phantom. See them getting skilled shots in. Actively forcing phantom into Danny. But they don’t stop. Still shooting at Danny.

Mr. Lancer watches as Jazz, Sam and Tucker manage to get them away. He ushers them to his car the five hardly manages to make it out. Danny seriously injured.

It’s only then does the phone connect to the justice league helpline.

[bejeweledaus]

BACK TO YOU | Jack Hughes au!

—

CHAPTER ONE:

yourusername posted

liked by trevorzegras, ememyers and 998,009 others

yourusername; it’s been a while but wanted to stop by and say hello 🫶🏼

view all 500 comments

ememyers my sweet dove 🕊️

user00 y/n is in her breakup era

yourinstagram i am actually in my ‘happiest i have ever been in awhile’ era :)

tervorzegras miss you but I’m really happy to see that you are doing okay

yourinstagram reunion between you and I is going to happen just you wait

user28 THE HAIR? ITS CHOPPED

user34 you are legit glowing 🥺

yourinstagram thanks, it’s all the water i have been drinking 💧

user67 bestie I don’t think that’s what they meant by ‘you are legit glowing’ 😭

user78 date me, I promise you that i am not a hockey player or any sports person

sabrinacarpenter stunning lovebug 🤍

user12 still can’t believe her and Jack are no longer together 😭

_quinnhughes hoping all is well y/n!

yourinstagram thank you, miss you quinn <3

user10 Jack still follows her 👀

user76 and? he never unfollowed her like she did

user34 i wanna be you when i grow up

yourinstagram are you 100% positive you want too?

user34 yes and yes

nicohischier where the sunglasses from? asking for a friend? (secretly asking for myself)

user89 NICO WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

user90 not Nico being in the comments 😭

user18 wait why is that a bad thing? your comment makes it seem like a bad thing?

user90 he’s part of jacks team but other than that I promise it wasn’t meant to be a bad thing just surprised lmao

yourinstagram nicohischier let me get back to you on that…

user100 if her and Jack didn’t break up, I could 100% see Nico and Y/N being best friends

jasminesavoy missing you <333

user45 jackhughes

user123 now that is not what we are going to do… why would you tag him…

user80 oh you bold for doing that…

*jackhughes liked your post*

*jackhughes left a comment on your post*

jackhughes hoping you are doing okay and that everything is all well. congratulations on everything by the way.

[sergle]

(re: sssniperwolf and jacksfilms) It's laughable that she escalated it that hard. Don't get me wrong, I'm pretty sure stalking him like that is illegal and it's terrifying regardless, but Jack said in a stream (can't remember which one) that he wasn't about bringing up past controversies of hers or cancelling. And now she shows up outside his house (wtf!!!). Like he was willing to only call her out for stealing and freebooting but she's gone and stalked him and Jack doesn't seem like the type of guy to take that shit. Actual WTF moment from her part. wild

omg long post below bc apparently I have opinions: YES!! THAT'S WHAT'S SO INCREDIBLE ABOUT THIS... Jack has been genuinely diligent about keeping things on-topic in his streams, and hasn't brought up any of her other Stuff, or anything Personal. Despite the fact that she kickstarted the whole thing by making it INCREDIBLY personal and attacking his physical appearance... His goal has been to call out and bring attention to content theft, and he's stuck with it. Dude's also cared about this for years, and she's not the first content thief he's criticized. He just hates the way that freebooting has become so accepted-- to the point where youtube praised her for "coming up with such creative video ideas"? Hey! Ew! Dude wasn't trying to get her cancelled though, there was no smear campaign of her character. He's been rallying to get her to CREDIT the creators that she relies on for all of her content. It would set a precedent for all other "react" channels on the platform for one of the biggest channels on youtube to actually give credit where credit is due. Or, god forbid, get permission first? It's not hard. It's already done the job of making some other people who do "react content" self-analyze whether or not their content is transformative, and to maybe care about crediting the creators they rely on for their genre to work. There is a way to make this kind of video that isn't so slimy. And making fun of her lackluster-at-best reactions is so far from even being a big deal. Bc she literally does just sit there and say nothing. Plus, his goal has a clear End built into it: if she started shouting out the creators she takes content from, and put links directly to their pages in her video descriptions, the job would be done! That's what he's asking her to do. Real bare minimum stuff. It legit would have been easy to steer away from the content theft and to also talk about her history of lying to her audience! her ghosting a dying kid with cancer who was a big fan of hers! the fact that she's been arrested for armed robbery! her history of transphobia! He would also get more clicks that way, which is what she claims is his sole goal- to get more clicks. I'll bring it up though! She's been a terrible person the whole time, and has kept a steady course of manipulating her audience of young children and/or, let's be completely honest, simps- into thinking that she's a Wholesome creator. (And now, into thinking she's an innocent victim.) All of the actual effort put in by her has gone toward optics, not the content she puts out. A carefully constructed online persona, for one, but also literal appearances. Jack totally can't say this, bc she already went off the handle and said the only reason he doesn't like her is bc he Hates To See A Woman Be Successful. But I can! That was a cheap shot for her to use that argument when, for once, it's not applicable! Much the opposite, even! Dudes online wouldn't go to bat for her if she didn't look the way she does. And it weakens any case she'd have against him by making baseless claims like that. She banks hugely on being an attractive woman to get her clicks/following. A massive amount of effort is put into her appearance. The makeup, the lip fillers, putting her hair in little pigtails, the chokers and tube tops, the big non-prescription Nerd Glasses, the thumbnails where she has her mouth open in That Expression?

I don't even have to say anything. But making a weird facial expression and putting your hair in pigtails aren't moral failings. Showing up at someone's real life home (whose address you shouldn't even have access to), filming the front of their house at night, doxxing them to your audience of millions of people? Because you were mad at them online? That is fully scary! Yeah girl I'm pretty sure that Jack can press charges! There is absolutely no way to take the moral highground now that she's literally stalked him, and doxxed his home. She tried to goad him and Erin (Jack's wife) out of the house, also, which creeps me out even more-- because what was she planning to do? The fact that she's been arrested for violent crime before does pop into my mind! lmao! Jack was streaming a game at the time that she was outside his home, and these clips of him, his friends, and Erin reacting in real time to what is genuinely a scary situation have been taken down in case he needs to use them in legal action. Shit is legitimately serious!