#technically three but you know.. yea...

[pokemonpo]

pmmm vtuber au ramble (apologising in advance if its really incoherent)

I got encouraged to brainrot jnfajkgnj (this is directly copied from my google doc so its really messy sorry ;;)

Mami, sayaka, kyouko and madoka all vaguely knew each other in their streamer past lives

(all youngish adults in college, Mami has graduated tho) 21-23

Sayaka and madoka are childhood friends

Madoka used to run a youtube channel called KNM Ch, where she would post vlogs and challenges (mild ones). She would also occasionally try to do advice videos. She got fairly popular (kind of), then started to do craft videos with Sayaka and Hitomi occasionally making guest appearances. She later sold these online for her 2k celebration. She starts streaming after entering highschool, but stops uploading and streaming entirely to take entrance exams, after which she announced that she would no longer be uploading. 

The vtuber agency KYUBEY inc. has had several waves before Magia Quartet, including an earlier food themed wave, with a few members, who unfortunately ended up graduating due to real life commitments. The only one left being Charlotte.

Magia Quartet debuted when Madoka entered college, with Candeloro, Ophelia, Oktavia von Seckendorff and Kriemhield Gretchen. The next wave, Homulily debuted alone, but had lore so tied to the Magia Quartet that most fans consider them the same wave. It reached the point where the company ended up officially combining both waves, renaming them to Holy Quintet. Homura is a long-time fan of KNM Ch, and started watching Madoka since she only had about 20 subscribers. She found Madoka at a low point in her life and this kept her keep going. To donate to Madoka, she used the online name devil_AKM, and this name became widely known as Kaname’s insane fan after Madoka started streaming for a week, and they kept donating max supas. Homura’s grades dropped drastically after Madoka announced her departure from the channel, but she somehow managed to bring them back up before it was too late.

While Madoka released several pieces of handmade merch for her 200k celebration, Homura ended up only getting like 2 pieces of jewellery. She wears one religiously, and the other is kept safely in a ziploc bag at home.

Homura still has poor health in this au. Alot of the wishes made in the original PMMM dont come true, except for Mami’s. So she’s still very much an orphan, but she isn’t as lonely due to the support of her online friends. 

Kyouko and Mami are longtime online friends due to being in the same content creator circle. They later broke away due to some disagreements, but did tell each other that they were probably going to stop creating content on their current accounts due to reasons.

They later met during a zoom call, and after a while they reconciled. 

Homura applied for the role of homulily after seeing Kriemhield Gretchen’s debut. Her own cute ditzy debut left a big impression.

After sayaka’s debut alot of people would frequently put ‘hazukashi.. Low hp’ in the chat whenever she dies in a game. She later made an emote with this. 

When they had their first off collab, they ended up showing each other’s faces beforehand so they would be able to recognise each other in public. Homura has an awful sleeping schedule, so she only ended up sending one in at around 12, but forgot to remove her KNM Ch earring. She quickly deleted it but Sayaka saw it and immediately cornered her. They got weirdly close after that.

Sayaka streams alot of rhythm games and occasionally plays music. She plays other games too, but once in a while she does mixing streams for fun. In the beginning, Madoka and her collab alot, occasionally doing handcam streams together, but after getting close to the rest, Kyouko and her end up streaming together alot more.

Mami does alot of handcam baking/cooking streams, as well as cake and tea reviews, to the point where alot of people are like you might as well be an irl streamer instead. Afterwards, she started playing games like cooking mama, and more mainstream family games like mario party, but alone. She streams at weird times due to her full time job, and it makes it difficult to coordinate with the rest of the girls. She ends up streaming alot with Homura after the official merge.

Homura and Madoka are both variety streamers, in that you can never predict what’s going to be on their schedules. Homura starts off tame at first, but alot of her streams end up being wild as time goes on. Once, she started giving such detailed information about bombs, her manager ended her stream immediately and took it down. Plays fps with Mami alot. Once, Sayaka and Homura had an off collab guerilla cooking stream together for cream stew. Madoka joined and said wow cream stew my favourite! The stream’s audio then immediately cut out for 10 full minutes, and then ended. It later came back on and neither Sayaka or Homura addressed it, and the vod was later heavily edited. Till today some people still bring it up, some people assuming they’re lying due to the low amount of concurrent viewers at the time.

Alot of the content of Madoka’s streams is very similar to what she did for KNM Ch, but now equipped with a bigger budget, she does even more stuff. Her main content is still craft streams though. 

Kyouko does alot of just chatting streams, and alot of food reviews. She gives alot of good advice, but most people don’t realise because when you open her channel all you see are fighting game streams and food reviews. Plays alot of two player games with sayaka like we were here, and river city girls. They bicker alot. 

Sayaka and Homura hang out alot offline secretly after the earring incident. They often go to arcades and do karaoke together. Once Sayaka uploaded a pic of their maimai scores accidentally onto her Oktavia von Seckendorff account instead of her sub account and the rest of the quartet replied with stuff like damn yall hanging out without us? + fans went wild Sayaka tried to play it off because too many people saw it and said she was hanging out with another friend, but opened her discord and got bombarded. Homura bought another aime card after that, but it didn't change much. 

Timeline of events is as follows 

Magia Quartet > Mami and Madoka both hit 100k subs > Magia Quartet off Collab > Domain of the Devil solo wave > Plans for a MQ + DD off Collab, along with Nagisa > Plans fall through, second MQ off Collab > Homura is free, they plan another meet up > Homura hits 100k > Homura second lore video drops > Company announces merge, Holy Quintet is formed > Homura sends the wrong photo > off Collab > Homura passes out at the end of the day after everything

In a wild turn of events, Kyouko ends up moving to the same city for uni. After the first year, Sayaka and Madoka end up rooming together. They realise they all live in the same city after planning the first HQ off Collab. 

Sayaka calls Homura transfer student after the merge.

Sayaka and Homura play project sekai and taiko tatsujin together at some point, and they start hanging out offline to go to the arcade. Homura starts to destroy sayaka's sleeping schedule. At some point, Madoka goes over to Mami's house for a tea time cake baking off Collab, and Sayaka mentions something along the lines of Yea Madoka loves cream stew, and Homura goes over to Sayaka and Madoka's house to learn it. Sayaka off-handedly mentions it would be good content and so they stream it.

It was both their first handcam stream, and it was extremely terrifying for everyone watching. There were multiple times where parts of Homura and Sayaka's hair and arms got into frame, but they got the hang of it by the middle of the stream. 

Some more intense fans caught a glimpse of Homura's earring, but most people didn't know where it was from due to Madoka not keeping up the 2k merch announcement after everything got sold, and the fact that Madoka used to be an irl cc.

Homura wears the earring accidentally to the first day of the offcollab, but her hair is so long Madoka doesn't realise. She takes it off after Sayaka teases her about it.

Homura appears in Madoka's chat all the time, but in reality they don't collab much or talk much. Once, Madoka invited Homura over for an off Collab zatsu. Homura was so nervous she came off as super stiff and awkward, to the point where alot of people stopped watching an hour in, and several fan theories came out that they hated each other. Most people missed the little chat they had after saying their goodbyes where they hadn't realised they were still live and had a heart to heart, and the vod was later taken down. Since then Homura has been genuinely in love with Madoka.

They start talking more after Sayaka posts the maimai photo on the wrong account.

There are multiple Oktavia bickering compilations on YouTube. Oktavia's top shipping tags are ChurchPiano/Oktphelia and Lilvia , especially after the wrong photo incident, and how much they collab. Alot of people theorise that Homura and Sayaka are together

This changed after Homura, Kyouko and Mami's drunk zatsudan though, where Homura got super hammered and started rambling about a super cool YouTuber she used to watch that changed her life and how much she loved her. Kyouko said something like lol parasocial and Homura said it's not if we are friends. This vod got taken down and edited shortly after, but it was clipped to hell.

They have an offline meetup to go to a dessert buffet together with Kyouko, and Kyouko has never felt more like a stranger than in that moment. 

Unnecessary detailing

KYUBEY Inc. calls their talents Puella Magi. Originally marketed similarly to hololive in that they’re supposed to be idol type characters. The theming started to change overtime as the company got bigger, so now the idol rules aren’t as enforced anymore. Magia Quartet was originally advertised as a 90s weaponry branch, but this was never fully confirmed. Magia Quartet is the second branch to no longer require the members to be able to dance and sing, though Connect was released a month after Holy Quintet was announced.

The company prioritises efficiency over effectiveness, and started releasing waves closer to one another after the initial success of the Kamihama branch. They later stopped this after the Holy Quintet merger.

Each branch is separated by city.

Following nijisanji type rules, on their anniversary the girls get second outfits, which are usually their witch forms. A few exlivers have come out to say that usually after receiving them, they don’t know when to use them due to them being so different compared to their first outfit. Due to this, competition for a third outfit is rough. Every graduation from this company has always come at least in pairs. A few exlivers have offhandedly mentioned working for a black company after leaving, but this has never been confirmed. There’s never been a termination. Once, they released a limited edition line of energy drinks themed after certain livers. The backlash was immense, but they went through with it anyway. These drinks are now heavily scalped online for thousands of dollars. The taste has been said to be indescribable.

Live interactions between full waves (with most members still active) are rare. However there’s an annual competition between all waves held at the end of the year. After the Holy Quintet merger, due to Nagisa’s wave only having her left, for the first Holy Quintet 3D live performance Nagisa was considered part of their wave. The reception was good, and collabs between the Holy Quintet members and Nagisa increased.

[unproduciblesmackdown]

truly 2 trans 2 furious is also extremely like [billionsposting as people never meant to be here yet having the symposium while not necessarily having a good time but we can also analyze &/or simply play around with it in other ways with an easy ability to deconstruct things enough for that & perhaps have a good time, perhaps have something way more complicated than that but which could also be called having a good time] like including in its having the "there's a nonbinary f&f character" entry in there at all through kompensoing & monitoring billions since & drawing funny little guys about it (winston, e.g., and taylor) and then also that like, Any & Every Entry in 2 trans 2 furious is of that genre of crucial tour de force visionary symposium understander posts that get 2 notes. and then compiling that is like yes of course this wins an award, a surprise but also not really at all.

[rosielav]

Bellefast has been coming to me in my dreams recently, in a similar way to how Monteith and Jibblie do

I find myself at The Circus, but in a sleeping quarter of some kind. And I can hear the festivities going on outside, in the big top. I'm apparently just passing through, but know everyone well enough that they let me stay on the property.

The only person I don't know is Bellefast, which is strange since he's the Ringleader, you tihnk I'd know him quite well, if I know all the clowns and performers and stagehands.

And he doesn't know me. So when he stumbles into the sleeping quarters, whiskey and candy floss on his breath, and falls into the bed, he's caught by surprise. As am I.

It feels like maybe a creative exercise? Maybe my brain wants to flesh this character out more, so it's putting him into my almost asleep brain so that I have to learn more about him.

So far I've learned he has a drinking problem.

[radiance1]

Danny has been reincarnated.

Which was an odd thing to realize, it wasn't even a slow one he just... snapped into it one day. One moment he was staring at a wall out of boredom the next, well, he was staring for an entirely different reason.

It was a task for his now young -he thinks around three years old?- mind to work its way through the memories, but it wasn't like he had much else to do honestly. So, what does he know?

His name is Danny, like, his actual name and not just a moniker. He was once a halfa and he already knows he's going to be missing invisibility and intangibility. He, well, died. For like, a second time which actually makes sense because reincarnation-

Anyways.

He was a clone of two people from this thing called the Justice League which, weird name but probably some government or activist group. Wonder Woman and Superman. Which were pretty weird names to name your kids but eh.

He doesn't really remember much besides that from this life, or the one from before but he's an adult! He'll figure things out once he gets out of this containment tube thing.

Did he mention he was in a test tube? He's a tube baby now. He thinks? Or maybe it's more like he's being contained.

Whatever.

So he breaks out. Thank you apparent superstrength that he has no idea why he has but he's not going to complain! He then wandered around all of the other test tubes, able to remember just enough of English to see that yea, they're dead.

He probably was too, before he had memories zapped into him. Or a vegetable.

He then finds this really big container, checks it out, then opens it because the clone inside isn't dead!

'Project Match' it said. He'll just call him Match.

Was he thanked for helping him? Nope. You would think that he would be thanked or at least somewhat respected for saving this guy but nope!

He was, quite literally, held up by his leg and dangled in the air. Who dangles a three-year-old?! Well, he was technically and adult but still! The next few things were a blur but after pulling off the old Fenton charm he found him and Match outside as he tried to stop him from attacking random people.

Luckily the charms and privilege of the youngest (he's assuming he's the youngest, because he's physically three) was more than enough to get through to him. Sure, the guy couldn't form words, really aggressive for literally no reason, really weird but also absolutely cool looking eyes. But he worked around the first issue by developing their own personal language from like grunts and stuff, the second he once again used his youngest privilege to boss him around and the third a pair of sunglasses easily fixed.

He just had to steer Match clear of those random S crest mark thingies. Which was a weird thing to hate but hey, he's not there to judge.

[seventhemaverick]

Astro Observations 2 🪽

Thank you for 120+ followers!! <3 this post has opinions and personal observations. Don’t take it too serious my babies. I love ur feedback. Please be kind, inform me otherwise!

☁️ I love how many people in the Astrology community are Scorpio risings, have dominant scorpio/8H placements/degrees, strong pluto influence like we’re all trying to find the meaning to all the f*ck shit that happens in our lives

☁️ Another dominance that I see in a natal chart that is really into these practices is Uranus and Neptune.

☁️ Lilith dominance in a natal chart can be rough especially when they make conjunctions to mars or Pluto. Men can sometimes be so mean to you especially when you both are around other people and you’re just like what just happened 😃? You were just telling me your deepest secrets and desires?? Odd… Á la poubelle 🚮

☁️ Speaking of Lilith, I get annoyed hearing that certain asteroids like Lilith and Chiron aren’t considered a part of a stellium 🙄 because if you can have Lilith dominance in your chart you should be able to consider it a part of your stellium as well? Same with Chiron. If there’s many aspects to those signs as well and if everything is energetically interconnected like astrology tries to show us, you would think those two asteroids at most would be considered. Especially because these asteroids play significant roles in HEALING *cough Chiron cough* and stepping into your power (Lilith). Both asteroids take a shorter amount of time to orbit the sun than most outer planets and some inner planets likeee cmon y’all.. me complaining because I’d technically have a Sagittarius stellium if Chiron and Lilith was included

☁️ Whatever quadrant(s) the majority of your placements fall in is what you are meant to focus on in this life. In the last quadrant, your focus could be on the world around you, humanitarian causes. A lot of planets in your first quadrant your mission in this lifetime is to be more self focused.

☁️ Intercepted houses are interesting... I’m very thankful I don’t have them because my chart is already 😀😗 .. yea. But I realized I’ve come across a lot of people with them and those houses if you don’t know already have a lot of focus on the house it pertains to. Example: intercepted houses in the 1st and 7th house means one of your life’s mission is learning how to assert yourself, set boundaries, find balance in relationships and your free time.

☁️ People that have intercepted houses usually attract people that has signs that rule those houses to teach them significant life lessons. So if you have 1st and 7th intercepted you’ll have someone who probably has Aries/libra in big three or within their chart , if you have 2nd and 8th you’ll attract someone with Taurus/Scorpio in big three or in their chart etc etc

☁️ If you’re feeling unstable it’s best to connect with the element you have most dominant in your chart. Whether it’s literally connecting to that element by physically interacting with it or you are doing the themes in relation to that element. This also applies to whatever sign your mars is in. Surrounding yourself with the element associated with your mars can allow you to release and ground yourself.

☁️ For instance, if you have a lot of water in your chart/water mars, swimming or being by the water and journaling, drawing, whatever creative outlet feels most healing to you by the water can bring you some peace. Talking to the ocean, lake, etc. can be grounding and if you’re really into esoteric practices you can give the water an offering in exchange for peace of mind. Earth, going on a hike, feeling the earth (not concrete yuck) with your bare soles/palms can be helpful, hugging and talking to trees. (Side note fun fact, removing vines that are wrapping a tree is also like an offering because vines growing around trees are invasive and preventing it from receiving sunlight, ultimately killing it. Save your local trees!! I see this as a form of an offering as well) Mother trees will help you most. Fire, first and foremost please be careful. Secondly, working with candles can be very healing and watching the light, taking walks when it’s really sunny, sun bathing, solar plexus yoga could bring much peace. Sun bathing your yoni when the sun is at its peak :) it really works. Air, burning incense whilst having good air ventilation, journaling, stimulating activities like running or jogging while simultaneously working on the breath. Breath work, mental workouts like chess. I might do a post about all Mars signs and specific activity outlets. Lmk in the comments if you guys would be interested :)

☁️ To break out of your comfort zone, to attract newness into your life, connect with the element you have least in your chart!

☁️ The element you have least of is what you tend to attract in others

☁️ People that connect more to sidereal astrology usually have some old soul-ness to them. I’ve observed it’s usually modern Astrology earth placements, mostly Taurus placements that tend to value that system more from what I’ve seen

☁️ I’ve noticed water sign placements/dominance like anime and k-pop a lot. Honorary mention is Aquarius but more towards anime.

☁️ I saw @harmoonix say this in one of their posts recently but this has been sitting in my drafts for over a month so I’m gonna agree and add on lol (love ur posts fr— trendsetter 💐) Aquarius placements, especially in the big 3, love video games. Love playing games on their phone and on a console. Love technology, it’s their safe space— a way to get away from the world. Aquarius does rule over technology! They’re the most tech savvy in the family. Their elders in their home relied on them for that stuff lol.

☁️ Sagittarius placements, esp mercury usually have different genres and languages of music in their catalog

☁️ For Sagittarius to be in detriment in Mercury that placement has many fantastic writers, poets, lyricists etc.

☁️ Earth placements, especially Capricorns can out smoke you. Out-any-substance you fr it’s actually crazy to witness 😂😂.

☁️ Your Groom (5129) or Briede (19029) in your natal chart can not only show the actual sign or house placements that your partner may have but the synastry overlays you both may have as well. For example you may have your groom asteroid in the sign virgo. Your spouses natal placements especially big 3 could have those planets fall into your sixth house. Virgo rules the sixth house.

☁️ This picture above is all Libra placements during this south node in Libra transit. The area Libra resides will show up and out! Villain era fr. Big 3 Libra placements will feel this way the most! This transit has me not giving ANY f*cks!

☁️ Your solar return rising sign is very important. It will tell you the themes that will take place in the new year ahead. For example: Virgo rising in your solar return has you more work and health focused. Should I make a post about solar return risings lmk in the comments!

☁️ It’s also interesting that your rising and moon sign in your solar return chart can pertain who you most come into contact with during. So if your rising is Leo that year you’ll probably befriend, get closer to, date many Leo’s or people that have Leo placements/degrees in their chart :). I can confirm that within each ascendant I have had in my returns since studying astrology the people I was closer to/in contact more with during the time period had those placements in big three especially.

☁️ not an observation but a statement of a dilemma of mine because I cannot choose between placidus and whole sign system. I deeply relate to both. I thankfully don’t have intercepted houses but I can see both sides to the placements in my chart and the different houses they reside in with both systems 😂 ok moving on

☁️ I use placidus house system mostly when I’m reading other people’s chart and whole sign when I’m reading compatibility charts

☁️ placidus is a better system to use for most people because we live in different hemispheres and that system caters to that imo

☁️ I realize most Pisces and Sagittarius placements loveeee green. It’s that Jupiter calling in that abundance!

☁️ Scorpio and Aries are ruled by mars and I have realized people with these placements like purple a lot. Capricorn placements tend to like purple too and cap is exalted in mars! Purple and black are associated with satur(n)day!

☁️ Saw an observation about sag mercuries always interrupt you and it’s true LMAO but they’re very passionate people and I think they just wanna get what they have to say off their chest

☁️ Sagittarius mercuries are the smartest Mercury sign imo.

☁️ Pisces placements especially in the big three are very crafty when it comes to talking their way out of being held accountable

☁️ Being around people that have the signs in your 2nd and 8th house can easily trigger you if you’re not actively working on healing your wounds

☁️ I haven’t met an air sign that doesn’t speak with their face and hands especially Gemini chile

☁️ Mars rules celibacy, Venus rules lust. I realize that people with strong Aries/Scorpio/Capricorn are not into having sex with multiple people simultaneously or can go long periods without having sex. They view sex as a very intimate activity.

☁️ hate to come down on my Venusians but Taurus and Libras and let’s not forget about my girl is exalted in Pisces! People with strong placements in these signs can be loyal but sometimes there can be wandering eyes. Like an itch they want to scratch so bad. Even if they’re very loyal in nature it’s more possible for them to flirt for fun or get into affairs more because they’re hedonistic in nature

☁️ when a Capricorn loves you they will always have your back and put into you financially to help your dreams come true. One of the most attentive , supportive people to have in your corner!

🪽 I wanted to post this sooner but I’m currently grieving the loss of my Capricorn dominant grandmother who was my closest confidant and greatest inspiration, about a month ago. She passed during her Saturn return and Uranus return. She lived an incredible life. Strongest, most fearless person I know. An entrepreneur who knew how to get it! Some people didn’t make it into the new year with us and I hope you know that you have now gained an angel. I’m grateful to the Tumblr astrology community for sharing their knowledge. Astrology really helps me make sense of the world and I’m happy that we all find peace in that. Sending my love and best wishes to you all. Thank you for reading and tuning in xoxo 🪽

[noisilyscreechingsong]

Danny ran away.

The classic reveal didn’t go right/ the GIW is hunting to him/ everyone is dead. You pick.

He’s alone. In Gotham. With nothing.

Staying in the city makes sense, right? Except for the crazy rogues he doesn’t want to get involved in or the straight up normal humans dressing up to fight them. Danny wasn’t touching that with a 10 foot pole. So he travelled further to the outskirts where he hoped to find a cabin some rich family only stays in for the summer.

Instead he finds rich mansions hidden back in the trees with big tall gates keeping everyone out. Most had people living there (he checked), all except for this one.

He’s only seen a kid, maybe ten, go in and out for school and sneaking out late at night.

Danny thinks he’s smart, sneaking in to snag some food and rest a bit when he knows the kid is gone. He doesn’t account for if the boy comes back earlier than normal.

Wide, surprised eyes meet wide, panicked eyes. Danny doesn’t even shove the next bite of Mac and Cheese in his mouth before he’s booking it to the nearest window.

“Wait!” Danny doesn’t wait. “You don’t have to go!”

Danny slows to a stop. Um, what?

He turns to give the boy a look but he doesn’t cringe back. The kid steps forward, almost impulsively.

“You’re the one who’s been stealing food and sleeping in the guest bedroom in the west wing, right?”

How the heck did he know where Danny was taking a nap? He always made sure to fix the bed when he left.

The boy continues without any answer.

“You don’t have to keep hiding. You can stay. I’ll provide you food and clothes and you can pick whatever room you want to stay in.”

Danny doesn’t know what’s gotten into the kid, but he suddenly feels flat footed and so off balanced.

“Why?” He asks incredulously. Why do all that for him? Why trust a strange teenager in his home? Why bother with him? He’s obviously homeless and has been stealing from him.

The boy’s lips thin slightly like he doesn’t want to say. Like he’s embarrassed.

Instead he says, “You had dozens of chances to steal any of the priceless artifacts in this house, but instead you only steal enough food for yourself and to rest.”

Okay. Yea, that was technically true and he could see the boy is thinking he figured out Danny’s personality by just that (it reminds him of Jazz how confident the kid is), but that doesn’t mean he’s trustworthy!

He goes to tell the kid off for thinking he knows anything about some random teen that keeps breaking into his house, but then notices the way the boy is holding himself.

“You’re hurt.”

The boy jolts like he wasn’t expecting Danny to notice at all. He looks down and adjusts his weight a bit.

“Uh…”

“Did you twist your ankle?” Danny guesses.

The boy mutely nods, looking at him with wide eyes with too much emotion to decipher.

“Well come sit down, don’t keep standing on it, dummy.”

The boy quickly makes his way over to sit delicately on the edge of the couch cushion. Danny goes to the freezer where he knows he saw an ice pack once when he was going through it.

Danny helps the kid turn and lay back until he can elevate the foot under a pillow and set the cold ice pack over the sock. The boy is still staring at him with those wide, intense eyes.

“Ice it for a while and after you take a shower I’ll wrap it for you. Where’s your first aid kit?”

“The first floor bathroom.”

“Which one? You have three.”

“Four actually. You missed the one in the laundry room.”

Danny gives him a look.

“Kid.”

“Tim,” the boy corrects happily. “My name is Tim. Timothy Drake.”

Danny just looks back for a few moments at what is undoubtedly a flicker of hope in those blue eyes. He sighs.

“I’m Danny.”

And a weird friendship was born. Or more of a sibling-ship? Brotherhood? They teeter over the line of friend and family daily.

Danny did stay and Tim was thrilled to have someone else in the house, someone that wasn’t cold or professional towards him. They played games together and joked and taught each other things.

Danny was good at fixing anything that was broken and was the one to do any errands while Tim was at school. He was also the one who had to teach Tim how to be a brother.

Tim on the other hand seemed to be good at everything but letting himself relax. He was a hyper and intelligent kid whose mind was always active, so Danny had to accommodate and come up with crazy games and tasks for the boy in the disguise of requests, but he also made the boy sit down with him to watch crappy movies and just relax together.

They had fun, but they also had bumps and misunderstands. Danny nearly blew his top when Tim snuck out to spy on Batman and Robin without telling him (and wasn’t that a conversation to remember when the Danny found out what he was really doing at night). And Tim had a problem with lying to try and make Danny not worry, which ended up doing the opposite.

They got through those hiccups together though because they were both too possessive to let the other go that easily.

Tim created a fake identity for Danny saying they were cousins. The same black hair and blue eyes kinda sold it with a backstory of Danny’s mother being disowned by Janet’s parents. Jack and Janet weren’t home enough (or invested enough) to confirm or deny.

It was funny though watching Tim stare after Jason Todd-Wayne longingly for a while, but enough was enough. If Tim secretly wanted to befriend his idol, then Danny would make it happen. And he did of course. He made friends with the butler after ‘losing’ a frisbee in their yard and asked if they could get together for dinner one night so Tim and Jason could hang out outside of school. Alfred obviously knew Danny was pushing for Tim’s sake, but he still agreed easily enough.

So became a normal for the Wayne’s and the Drake’s to eat dinner together at least once a month. And after many meetings Danny mentally checked them off as ‘okay enough for vigilantes’ and stayed behind while the two younger boys ran off to go play a game before they headed home next door.

“Mr. Wayne?”

“Come now, you know you can call me Bruce, Danny,” the man smiles. It’s a little too wide, but Danny understands he’s still trying to put on the Brucie mask. He really wish he wouldn’t.

“Right, Bruce.” He fidgets for a second with his hoodie strings and he can feel Bruce’s attention zero in on the motion. “I need to ask you a favor.”

The air turns tense with the silence after that.

“What’s wrong, Danny? Is everything okay?”

“Everything’s fine! Promise. I just- I just need you to promise me something. Please.”

Danny felt so awkward. He has never relied on an adult before, always doing everything himself or with other kids, something Tim and him have in common. So to turn to Bruce Wayne was out of character, but he wasn’t really. He was asking Batman, and him Danny could trust a little more.

“Promise you what?”

Danny could hear the barely covered suspicion in his voice.

“If- If something happens and I’m not around anymore, I need you to take Tim in,” he states, looking at the man full on to show how serious a matter this was.

The man stares back equally serious.

“What would happen to you? Are you in some kind of trouble?” Bruce asks.

Danny shakes his head hard.

“I’m not into drugs, Bruce. Or a gang or gambling or anything like that okay? I don’t owe any debt someone’s coming after me for. I just need insurance, some piece of mind that if something did happen that meant I couldn’t take care of Tim, there would be someone to look after him.”

Bruce stares back, thinking, for several moments.

“Tim has parents, Danny, I don’t know what you expect me to do. And what do you mean you take care of him? Don’t you boys have a caretaker?”

“Of course we don’t. We look after each other, but I’m the oldest. His parents are never home. I’m not exaggerating, they were in Gotham for only fifty-four days last year. They missed Tim’s birthday, holidays, everything. He’s still a kid, he needs someone to be there for him and if I’m suddenly gone then he has no one. Promise me that won’t happen. Promise me you’ll take him in, that you’ll figure out a way to keep him with you so he at least has Jason and you and Alfred.”

Bruce is silent for a while and Danny knows what he’s struggling with. He didn’t really want to use his trump card, but desperate measures.

“We already know who you are. You don’t have to worry about him finding out your secret.”

All traces of the Brucie mask drops at that confession and Batman analyzes him.

“How?”

“Tim is a really smart kid,” he just says with a fond smile. “He’s known for a while too, so you know he won’t go blabbing to the media or whatever.”

“What about you?”

“If I wanted to blackmail you, don’t you think I would have led with that? I don’t care what you do in your free time, but it’s not my business to tell.”

Danny shrugs and tries not to squirm under being scrutinized.

“Since you know who I am, if you are in trouble or ever need help, you can come to me.”

Danny blinks.

“Yea, that’s what I’m doing. So do you promise?”

Bruce nods once, very controlled.

“Yes. I promise you that I will take care of Tim Drake if anything happens to you,” the man vows solemnly.

Danny smiles back, shoulders sagging in relief.

“Thank you.”

When Danny somehow saves Jason from dying, and two months later goes missing, Bruce has to honor that promise while also tracking down the teenager to bring home to a very distraught Tim.

[jazzsonly]

ʙᴇᴛᴛᴇʀ ᴏꜰꜰ

pairing(s): maddy perez x fem!reader (no pronouns used.)

warning(s): angst? arguing? none technically. old fic meaning old ass writing.

summary: you can't understand why Maddy won't save your failing relationship

part two. (coming soon!)

────────✬────────

you were laid against fezco's couch while you, him, and rue shared a blunt. tv on, with a random movie blaring from it. you don't know, you weren't really paying attention. maddy was clouding your mind as she usually did.

you had your sixth argument alone this week. you were tired—you couldn't understand. everything was fine. you were fine—more than fine, you were happy. so was maddy or at least you thought because all she seemed to do was start an argument lately. the weirdest part: she'd get even more mad when you tried to deescalate the situation and understand her.

"i think jules is cheating on me." rue announced, blowing smoke from her nose.

"oh word?" fezco let out while I was hummed in response.

was that it? was maddy cheating on you? no. you held her too high to think of her doing that.

"she’a been hanging with elliot a lottt." rue dragged her words.

"maybe you should ask her..." you trail off.

“you know, communicate.”

"yea’ that's word. communication is key." you both turn to fezco.

"when have you been in a relationship?" rue asked the question you were both thinking.

"don’t worry about me—I know a little some." you snort, you loved fez. you knew if you needed anything he had you.

"yo, there's this weird ass old guy out back." everyone looked at ashtray who held a shotgun in his hands.

"fuck, man."

fez stood and turned to both of you, "y'all should head out."

you didn't ask any questions, standing up you made your way to the door. rue behind you as well, grumbling about how she was comfortable.

"you need a ride?" you asked the Bennett.

"nah I got a bike."

✬

maddy's house was on the way to yours so you figured why not stop by. you weren't in the mood to argue so you thought maybe you could get her relaxed and watch a movie.

you knocked on the door a totaled or three times before her mom open it,

"y/n?" she seemed oddly surprised to see you.

"hey mrs.perez, is maddy here?"

"yeah, she's in her room." she pointed to the familiar stairs, stepping aside to let you.

you followed the route upstairs, knocking on the bedroom door twice before peaking your head in. maddy on her bed, phone to her ear. her eyes met you face and she rolled her eyes before telling whoever (assumed Cassie) on the phone she'd call them later.

"hey—I was on my way home and wanted to stop by, hope you don't min—

"come here." you followed, closing the door behind you. surprisingly, she pulled you into a hug, after placing a kiss on the corner of your mouth.

"listen, I don't wanna argu—

"were you smoking?" she questioned, sniffing your shirt that had a light scent of weed.

"yeah, just a little." you mutter already having an idea where this was going.

"you've been doing it a lot—and you've been hanging with rue."

"i’m not on that shit, maddy. just some weed and light drinking. just to relax." you huff at her accusation.

"drinking too? what? you gonna end of like my dad AND rue?" here you go.

"maddy—"

"you’re so fucking selfish." here come the insults.

“i do it because of you!" you blurt of out, voice rising.

"me? no you do because you're fucking self and only think about yourself. god—i should've known when i found you were friends with rue and fez."

you perk up, pointing your finger. “they're good people. don’t you fucking look down on them."

you weren't normally defensive but you weren't gonna let her shit talk your people.

"look, maddy, i didn't come here for this shit. so call me when you get your head on right, bro." you stood, trying to exit of the door you came in but maddy’s hand caught your wrist.

"stay."

"i just—

"we can watch a movie." she gave you doe eyes and you contemplated for a second.

if you stay you know you'd probably argue again but there's also a chance you can be civil. but that was a 75 to 35 ratio

"please, baby."

you sigh, sitting back down.

━━━ 👩🏽‍💻

[paiges-1vur]

hey loves! heres another pazzi fic for you guys because i know you love pazzi fics as much as i do. <3 🏀🌌👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

“mm.. your not going anywhere. get back here” paige mumbled into azzis shoulder as she tightened her grip on her waist, pulling the girl towards herself.

“paige i have to get up i told you. i havent texted my parents all night, they are gonna think you kidnapped me,” the brunette jokes, giggling slightly. “paige- oh my gosh” the brunette says trying not to laugh, while also being slightly irritated that she cannot get up. she eventually gives into the blondes touch, smiling. “dont worry paigey im right here. not going anywhere.”

the two girls have been friends, teammates, and practically sisters for the past three years. they had both felt feelings for each other ever since they got closer, when paige was a senior in highschool. although they felt this way, they never told anyone except those who were very close to them. family, friends, and teammates were all very supportive but the girls didnt want to tell the media just yet. they liked keeping what they had special, and they didnt want the media to twist anything, their relationship was perfect the way it was.

“you better not,” paige mumbles. her voice is husky and low. “you know i miss you like a bitch when your not visiting right? i need all the azzi time i can get.” she says pulling the girl even closer to herself, earning a giggle from the brunette. “and you better come to Uconn, or else…” paige threatens azzi, jokingly.

“oh yea?” azzi asks smirking to herself. “and what would you do if i didnt commit next year..?” the older blonde gets clearly upset at the idea of being without the brunette and her demeanor quickly changes. before she knows it, azzi is being flipped over onto her back. paige hovers over her, smiling down at her. “take it back..” she taunts azzi.

“wha- paige” she says starting to laugh, “i was just joking i promise its not that serious.” she tries to escape from under paige to lie back down but only gets denied when paige grabs her wrists and pins them above her head. “hmmm” she says leaning into azzis ear. “i didnt like that joke, it wasnt very funny..”

“i-” azzi swallows. “i was just kidding paige..i-i already said that.”

“and i heard you the first time baby..” paige says leaning down to leave a trail of kisses down her jawline. “so i said take it back..” slowly her kisses move down to her neck. azzi throws her head back, allowing paige more access to her neck. paige lets out a low laugh at this, starting to leave little bites and marks all over her neck.

“it.. was just a joke. im not going to take it back” azzi doesnt budge. she doesnt understand why all of a sudden paige got so worked up, but shes not complaining. it was rare paige had her dorm to herself, but tonight was special. azzi loved cuddling, but she was secretly hoping that something different would happen tonight…

paige kept placing kisses and love bites on her neck, driving azzi wild. she took a hand and snuck it just under azzis sweatshirt, placing it just above the waistband of azzis sweats.. well technically paiges sweats. “paige-”

paige immediately stopped and looked up at azzi. “yes baby?” she was concerned about why azzi stopped her. did she want her to stop? maybe she wasn’t in the mood anymore, which would have been totally fine with paige, but that wasnt the case.

“i love you.” is all she said before putting her head back down on the pillow. paige smiled and broke the waistband of azzis sweats with her middle finger and ring finger. “i love you too baby.. just lay back for me”

sorry this is so short loves. congrats if you read all the way through, and any interaction is appreciated <3 please dont be shy to drop reqs in my anon, or message me! of course also dont be shy to be “too specific” i want to make you guys as happy as i can with my writing. tips also appreciated always

[dc418writes]

I Hope You Cry for Me Like I Cry for You…

✨Pairing✨: John Stewartxblack!reader

Summary🪄: Not everything is as John left it. Certainly not you (AU)

🚨: 18+ NO MINORS!!, angst, technical breaking and entering (but we let it slide this time), brief mention of unprotected past happy adult fun times (everyone please be safe out there!), p in v, brief mentions of nudity, bits of fluff mixed in (it’s me so you already know lol)

Fic inspo: (loosely inspired by)

*DISCLAIMER!: I DO NOT CLAIM OWNERSHIP or pictures used as they were all found via Pinterest*

Gently landing on the lush grass, John instantly feels a calmness wash over him that only the familiar single story farmhouse could grant. Even from the outside he could already feel your presence from the bed of colorful flowers just below the porch. The wind chime gently swaying in the evening breeze creating a bright melody that somehow embodied you.

He’s careful climbing the three steps to the creaky porch that groans under his weight. Using your spare under the leg of your favorite rocking chair, John enters the quiet home immediately hit with the clean smell of detergent mixed with something citrus. Probably that one candle you loved and kept stocked as if you’d never see another one again.

“A whole case?,” John asked placing the wooden box in the bed of his truck. He should’ve known you didn’t just want to ‘look around’ that day at the farmer’s market when you made a direct bee-line to a cutely decorated table displaying homemade lotions and balms.

“I’m supporting a friend,” you shrugged. A hint of guilt in your brown eyes like a child getting caught stealing a freshly baked cookie after being told to wait.

The man just chuckled with a shake of his head before placing a soft kiss to your glossy lips.

John knows this is a bad idea, he shouldn’t even be on Earth - due to Galaxy 515-1 to check on a possible threat - yet he couldn’t stay away. It’s already been a year since he last saw you, and he’s honestly surprised he lasted that long. On the outside, he remained the calm and focused military man he was trained to be. Yet internally, every cell in his body craved you. Every night thoughts of you filled his mind and flooded his dreams. The distractions of a busy day no longer present to suppress his aching emotions. Sometimes, he’d go for another jog - and another, and another - until his body was exhausted enough to demand sleep of him. Other times he’d just lie there with all the feelings.

Picture the moments between the two of you that he’d never let himself forget.

“That one’s my favorite,” a soft, harmonious voice speaks causing John to look away from the galaxy projected on the wall in front of him. Long braids stopping just above your hips, your eyes sparkled as if they were stars themselves. The purple, pink, and orange from the display illuminating your soft skin and beautiful features made you look ethereal; as if you were the one from a different planet or galaxy.

“Spring’s Spiral,” you softly smile and John can feel a pleasant stab to his heart. “When I have time and need a pick me up, I’ll just watch and watch until I feel better.”

Hopefully you never found out about its inhabitants. For such a peaceful looking galaxy, its creatures were war hungry, tending to fight each other over the smallest of issues.

“It is beautiful,” he agrees begrudgingly willing himself to look back at the projection to not seem like a staring creep. “You come often?”

You nod, “mainly because I work here, but even if I didn’t I’d probably be here everyday.”

“That big a fan of space huh?”

“Yea, and museums in general.” Since you were a child, you always loved them spending all day walking through the halls filled with all sorts of artifacts and paintings. The space section was your favorite by far though enjoying the twinkling ‘stars’ hanging from the ceiling and life-sized model of the solar system. Many nights - when you gazed at the stars outside of your own room - you wished you could live in the museum so you’d have endless access.

Years later, that dream somewhat came true. That unlimited access restricted to your hour lunch break though.

“Sorry,” you nervously smile taking half a step back. Then another. “I’m just yappin’ away interrupting your time-,”

“You’re good,” he waves off. If his voice wasn’t enough to make you melt, that magazine worthy smile was the knockout punch. “It’s always nice to meet someone with similar interests.”

When his dark brown eyes meet yours, you feel your breath hitch in your throat as your heart skips a beat. How could they be so intense yet soft and welcoming all once?

“It is.”

From that day forth, you were inseparable. He’d visit with you at the museum for lunch, then you’d meet for dinner. On your off days, you took turns planning little dates around town whether it was a picnic or stargazing until your lids became too heavy to keep open.

And each moment with you, he could feel himself falling deeper and deeper.

His next step across your dark wood floor is met with a small whimper making him halt in place. He’d think maybe it was just his mind if not for the same whimper sounding again followed by a cough moments later. Headed towards the source, he can feel his heart quicken and dread begin to flow through his veins hoping he wouldn’t find what he believed to be true.

Finally reaching the doorway of what used to be your personal library, he instead finds dark blue walls of a nursery. Specifically, one fit for a baby boy. Painted white clouds lined the area just above the crib fitted with a heather gray sheet and a miniature blanket displaying the phases of the moon. The other wall held the changing table along with a tall, hand built closet for his clothes. The name ‘Jordan’ painted in colorful letters on one door while the other had stars of various sizes.

You moved on.

You found someone new; had the family you’d always wanted. The part of John that wanted the best for you was happy and hoped your new man loved you the way you deserved. But he couldn’t lie that his chest ached that it wasn’t him. Could feel a crack grow in his heart that he couldn’t give you the life you dreamed.

“It’s for the best,” he thought to himself as he caught a glimpse of his uniformed reflection in the window across from him. Was reminded of the Green Lantern Corps and how his new obligation was the wellbeing of the universe. He started to leave - his ring glowing to harness what he needed from his power - but Jordan’s whines made him pause. His feet carrying him closer to the wooden crib before he could change his mind.

The baby was beautiful. Silky, black, curly hair peeked from under the cap covering his head while his tiny hands rubbed against his cute button nose. Deep dimples appeared in his cheeks from his worsening cries and long, curled lashes fluttered over deep ebony eyes similar to yours. Overall he was perfect.

“Shh,” John gently cooed trying to calm him down, and surprisingly he did for a moment cocking his little head to the side to get a better look at the giant of a man above him. John softly smiled at the baby boy, beginning to reach a hesitant hand toward him until incoming footfalls made him immediately turn invisible as he moved to the corner of the room.

“What’s wrong baby boy?,” you ask as soon as you enter the doorway looking just as gorgeous as the day he left. Admittedly, maybe more with the afterglow of having recently given birth. “Hungry already?”

As if understanding, Jordan’s little legs wiggle and kick making you tiredly giggle as you pick up the three-month-old. “Midnight special coming up.”

He should leave. He caught his glimpse of you and saw you were fine - John’s ultimate goal of this visit. But a glimpse wasn’t enough anymore. After going so long without, he became greedy wanting to soak up as much time as he could with you.

“So I saw your titi today,” you begin after settling into the cushioned rocker. Jordan immediately latched to your breast with his hand in the center of your chest and wide eyes trained on you. “As you could expect, she didn’t come empty handed so you’ll see your presents tomorrow. Promise.”

Jordan’s grunt nearly makes John chuckle at how responsive he was already. Little man was more intelligent than any infant he’d been around. Human or otherworldly.

“Don’t gimme that, I said I promise,” you smile smoothing the back of your finger over his cheek. “We talked and ate. I showed her the pictures from the park the other day, which she loved. Everything was good…and of course he came up.”

At the mention of a ‘he’, John’s ears perk and a protectiveness overwhelms him. Who was he? What did he do? Did he hurt you? Or Jordan?

“She says I should let him go. That he’s just some player who had his fun and is probably on to the next. She also said some other stuff, but I won’t repeat that in front of you.”

This time a heavy sigh leaves his nostrils and you swear you see him try to roll eyes. “Um excuse you, attitude,” you giggle. His dimples deepen as he briefly smiles before resuming his late night snack.

“Looking at the facts I know she’s right..but my heart won’t let him go..and honestly I don’t want to.” Milk dribbling from his mouth and hazy eyes signal your son’s impending milk coma. Like most babies he tries to fight it as you reposition him on your shoulder to burp, but you both know that’ll only last so long.

“I mean he can’t be all that bad,” you say mostly to yourself bouncing and gently patting Jordan’s back until a couple soft burps fill the quiet of the room making a soft, yet sad, smile paint your full lips. “He gave me you right?”

Placing a kiss to his forehead, you’re careful to return him to his crib trying not to disrupt his newfound sleep. As you gaze at your beautiful boy, you can’t help but think of John - as you did most nights. Wonder if he was okay. Had he truly just used you as a temporary toy.

You might seem crazy to others, but you felt he’d come back to you. In the depths of your soul knew he still loved you just as you did him.

“John would love you so much J.”

“I have to leave,” John states in a near whisper causing you to pause the movie on your screen.

“Oh okay.” Rather than the usual wide smile you’d grown to love, you see the gloom in his eyes. Can feel a shift in his once easy going mood that has your brows furrowed in concern and instantly caressing his smooth cheek. “Hey we can watch the rest later, no worries.”

“By leave I mean for an extended time…I don’t know when I’ll be back.”

“Oh..,” is all you can manage to say as your stomach sinks lower than you’d ever think it could go. “Top secret military stuff?”

He nods covering your hand with his. He didn’t want to lose your touch. The way it was like a live wire leaving him with tingles and a warmth he’d grown to crave like it was oxygen. “When do you leave?”

“0600 tomorrow morning.”

“Wow…that soon huh?,” you attempt to joke, but it doesn’t translate in your eyes. John can clearly see your hurt and disappointment. It has guilt spreading throughout his chest causing an adjoining lump in his throat.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault,” you manage to softly smile when everything in you wanted to crumble. Your thumb tracing along his cheekbone - and his along your wrist - calming you enough to keep your tears at bay.

Wasn’t it his fault though? John was supposed to keep a low profile strictly focused on guarding this portion of the universe. His home. Yet he fell for you. Wanted to wake up to you every morning and be there when you closed your eyes to sleep after a long day. Envisioned that intimate normalcy he knew he couldn’t give. Now he was breaking your heart because of his selfishness.

Loosening your hand to reach for your neck, John watches you remove your gold four leaf clover pendant before leaning forward.

“Wait,” he says as you fasten the thin chain around his neck admiring the gold as it shined against his near caramel skin. “I can’t.” He couldn’t take what was probably your most prized possession. Even you said yourself you couldn’t live without it.

“Something not only for luck,” you sniffle, “but to help bring us back together…whether in this life or the next.”

Before either tear from you or John could fall, his lips crash against yours trying to savor their feel and peach taste. It’s the most passionate, tender kiss you’ve ever had that, although perfect, only makes more tears flow from your cheeks to his.

The need to be wrapped in each other for as long as you can has neither of you thinking as hands wandered and groped causing moans and whimpers to flow out to the open air. Removed any and all annoying articles of clothing that were now too constricting. And when John eventually slides into you so deep it’s as if he’s linked directly to your soul, your brain completely empties only focused how good he’s making you feel pushing in and pulling out so deliciously paced.

That’s how you spent the whole night, taking turns resting and indulging in each other. The next morning you awoke having been moved to your bed with no sign of John. He thought it better that way - more so for his sake than yours.

And now he had a son. A baby boy he wasn’t there to welcome into the world nor be there for you during your pregnancy. The weight of it all has him sinking to the floor with a hand over his thudding heart - and your pendant - watching as you left the room for sleep yourself.

There was joy mixed in though, knowing you both were happy and doing well. That you still loved him and hadn’t given up. After what seems like an hour, he’s finally able to stand - no longer invisible - stepping towards the crib to gaze one more time at the incredible being you both created. He dares even reach out like before, but this time smoothing the back his finger along Jordan’s outstretched arm.

“She’s right little man,” he whispers. “I love you and your mother. So much. And I promise this isn’t the last you’ll hear or see me.”

[sapchat]

We Are Not Our Fathers

Azriel x Reader

Summary: You get summoned to your mate and Cassian whilst they are on a mission, only to find out there was a surprise at the end of it.

Warnings: mentions of a fight, children, and an argument between two lovers.

Words: 5k

Part 1: You are here! Part 2

Fun fact: this is technically my third fanfic now, cuz I’ve got a part one for something else and I’m writing part two, I just got this idea yesterday while listening to this playlist and was like “I need angst, azriel, his mate and a child.”

Azriel and Cassian had been at one of the Illyrian camps investigating rumors of… something. You hadn’t been paying attention when your mate told you why, he’d been getting dressed while telling. So, you could see the distraction at the time. It had been at least two hours since your mate had left and you got summoned down the bond, and a shadow seemed to tug at your hand.

So, following the bond you appeared in a typical Illyrian Steppes living room, with Azriel at the top of the steps.

“Hey, we uh, need you up here. We thought we were done but Cass found someone.” Azriel said meeting me at the bottom of the steps and grabbing a hand, rubbing his fingers on my wrist. He picked the habit up a few years into our bond, he says it keeps him grounded, especially after or during missions like these. Nodding my head, I followed the narrow steps behind him to see Cassian standing in the doorway of one of the rooms, there was a smidge of blood on the side of a wall, so I wasn’t sure what I was going to walk in on.

A little winged child was not what I was expecting. Cassian looked at me sheepishly then nodded to the side so the three of us could talk.

“So, I’m going to assume we didn’t know there was a child here?” I asked leaning against the wall.

“From what we could tell there were no reports of a child when we first started getting reports of the retaliation happening. My shadows also didn’t pick up on a child when we got here, so either he was just hiding really well because of the guests in the house, or he snuck in.” Azriel responded.

“Any idea how much he heard? Or what does his parental situation look like?” I asked, I needed to know how bad this situation could be. Especially if this child doesn’t have a family because of its father’s or mother’s choices.

“For the most part, some of them went easy. Only three of ‘em put up any real fight, hence some of the blood there by your head,” Cassian started.

“Ew, thanks for telling me that one.” I’ll just shuffle to the side.

“As for a possible guardian, he hasn’t answered any questions. He did call me a bastard though, so I guess he has listened to something while around them.” Cassian finished. He seemed almost more stressed than I. I assume because he’s become quite partial to being babysitter for Nyx in the last few months for Feyre and Rhysand to be able to go out.

“What do you think, he’s probably what four, maybe five. You have more experience in working with kids, and with Madja, what do you think his outcome is with what he’s been dealt.” Azriel asked, dragging a scarred hand down his face.

“All children are different. One could experience something awful like the death of a parent and not remember anything about it. Others could never recover from it and grow up acting out the rest of their lives. It’s just a matter of how they get help. And knowing this camp, they probably won’t get much mental help at all. You two should know that” It’s not what they wanted to hear I imagine, but it was the truth. “So, what’s the plan? I assume if you have summoned me here you want me to go talk to him?”

“Yea actually, that’s exactly what so thanks for offering that so we don’t have to ask.” Cassian states rubbing the back of his head. Little shit.

Sighing, I turn my eyes to my mates, who just shrugged. I’ve been left here with the two most awkward people when it comes to random kids. Such a surprise came from the man-child Cassian himself. I roll my eyes, but send something to calm down the bond, and turn to go into the room.

The child is on the smaller side, evidence of the winter that’s still in the mountains so it’s evident his family doesn’t have much money for food. He’s got some dirt on his clothes so he’s either been out playing today or he just doesn’t have many clothing options. His wings were on the smaller side for what we assume his age group is, so he either is just going to have slightly smaller wings, or he’s developmentally delayed for his possible age. Probably due to the lack of food and hygiene.

I step slowly into the room, trying to make my slightly tall frame smaller. “Hi there. What’s your name?”

The little boy looked at me with wide hazel eyes, a twinkle in it that I couldn’t tell meant he was scared or intrigued by my presence. “Hawthorne.”

“Hawthorne huh?” You ask, then tell him your name, “Are you okay Hawthorne?” I ask him, he sits up just a little taller, a twitch in his bat-like wing following after.

He nodded his head in response, and I nodded back in understanding. “I was wondering who you were here with buddy? It’s okay if I call you buddy, right?”

“I was with my daddy. and I don’t know if you can call me buddy. Daddy’s usually the only one that does. Daddy said it’s cause we’re friends, but I don’t know you.” He answers sheepishly looking around my body towards the end, telling me I have a shadow, likely two of them.

“Well, if I tell you something about me, and then you tell me something, then we would be friends, wouldn’t we?” He hesitates, thinking about the question then nods his head quickly.

“Okay, well you know my name already,” I say then move to sit on the corner of the bed and make it seem like I’m thinking about my fact, “One of my favorite things ever, is getting to go and watch the sunrise or sunset as it comes up or down, and it shine on the soft snow. It’s really pretty.” I say, his head perks up a little at what I tell him.

“I like that too! I also like it when it storms, 'cause that means I don’t have to go out and I get to stay inside with my daddy.” He says. I smile at his enthusiasm of getting to share something we both like.

“I’ll tell you another secret then.” His eyes get really wide, and I feel a questioning brush through the bond. “I also like it when it storms. Because that means I get to stay inside with my friends.”

“Are they your friends?” Hawthorne asks looking at Cassian and Azriel behind me.

“Yeah, those are my really good friends, Cassian and Azriel. They… came to talk to the people that were downstairs. Did you know them?” I ask, glancing at the two males behind me, who are trying to seem small, but with the size of Cassian and Azriel’s wings. They’re failing.

“It was my daddy and their friends. I heard lots of yelling. And that they called your friends bastards. So, I did when they came up here. Where is my daddy?” I looked at Azriel for an answer, he looked down and then at Hawthorne.

“We took your father somewhere so we could talk with them. Do you have a mother we could take you to? Or anyone else.” Azriel answered the child.

Hawthorne shook his head no, “Daddy says mommy died when I was little, even smaller than now. And daddy says I’m the only thing he has left. But I think that’s silly 'cause we have neighbors!”

I sigh and look at my mate and Cassian, I then look back to the hallway and back to the child, “Hawthorn I’m going to go talk with my friends really quick, are you okay here?” The boy nods his head and watches as the three of us leave the room.

It’s now my turn to rub my hands down my face. “What do we do with him? I assume mom either died in childbirth or from sickness. And now we’ve got dad where he’s going to probably be punished for what they’ve been planning.”

Cassian almost winces at the last part, “His father was one of the people to put up a fight. We’ve got him in Hewn City right now, one of the others said he’s the ring leader for wanting to try and get rid of Rhys, and ‘go back to the old ways.’”

“Gotta love males and their ever-needing reason to be on top,” Azriel said laying back against the wall across from me, one of his feet resting between my ankles.

“We asked Rhys what he thought. He thinks it should be up to you.” Cassian said.

I processed the question for a second. Thinking about the options that are available. If Hawthorne stays, he’ll be homeless, wandering the streets like Cassian did; and based on how he looks already, he probably wouldn’t last long. Or taking him with us. To Velaris and trying to find him a place there. He could stay in the House of Wind until we find somewhere or someone.

I look at Azriel and he nods, knowing what I’m going to decide. If I had it my way, there would be no children wandering the roads here in the camps. But the orphanage idea has been slow, Devlon the only one wanting to even entertain the idea.

“Take him with us. He’ll be better off in Velaris, and until we can find somewhere permanent, he can stay in the House with us all.” I say, Cassian nods knowing I’m making the decision based on what he’s told me of his past before Rhys and his mother.

“Looks like you’ll get a friend Cassian, I’ll be sure to set up playdates.” Azriel says pushing off the way and patting his brother on the back.

Cassian had a shocked look on his face, eyes following Azriel as he followed me back into the room Hawthorne was patiently waiting in.

“Hey, Hawthorne? How about you come with me and my friends for a little bit, until we can see if your father gets into trouble, okay?” I asked going in and sitting on his bed, angling my body to be eye level with the winged boy. He seemed to sit and think about it for a second, then spared Azriel a questioning look before looking back at me.

“Will I still get to do my training?”

My eyes widen just a tad. Training at five? I look over my shoulder to Cassian and Azriel in question.

“Yeah me, and Cassian can help with that. We’re both really going at flying so we can help you learn some.” Azriel told the child, putting a lot of emphasis on them being so good at flying. This seemed to make the boy happy.

“Okay then. I guess I’ll come with you. But I get to bring my toys!”

“We wouldn’t expect you to leave them behind buddy. Now where are your clothes?” I said standing from the bed and ruffling my fingers through his dark brown almost black hair.

Hawthorne jumped from the bed, his little wings flapping as he did, and ran to the dresser in the corner of the room. He pulled open a drawer almost at eye level and grabbed what little clothes sat in there. “Here they are!” He ran back over and handed them to me. He only had two shirts and another pair of pants, plus only a few pairs of undergarments.

I looked in the direction of my mate and he nodded at what I was thinking. We’ll have to get him some more clothes. I held my hand out and Azriel summoned a bag from the shadows and handed it to me. I usually use it for the farmers market, but I’ll just get a new one.

“Okay, bubs, come here and I’ll hold you while Azriel takes us back to the house.” The boy hopped over with a questioning look on his face.

“He’s going to fly both of us to your house?”

“Nope! He’s going to do something called winnow, which means,” I sat for a second thinking how to explain this to a child, “he’ll grab my and Cassian's hand, and then we’ll disappear and then reappear in the house!” Yeah, that was a great explanation.

Hawthorne seemed to question it for a second, then came over and all but crawled up into my arms. I moved the bag to my shoulder and then joined Azriel and Cassian. The three of us all looked at each other as if questioning what I’d decided.

And into the shadows we went, only for Azriel to then grab onto me tighter to glide us down to the balcony of the House of Wind. Hawthorne gripped my neck tighter looking around at all he could see of Velaris. And I knew I had made a good decision for the boy.

Feet touching the ground Hawthorne all but leaped from my arms to run and look over the balcony, pulling himself up by using his feet on the spindles to gain leverage to look out. Mouth opening by the second, I leaned back against Az watching the boy. He’s never seen so many people at once living in such a beautiful place.

“Hawthorne, wanna go get a quick snack before we get you cleaned up in a tub?” I asked leaving my mates front to join the boy at the railing. He looked up at me with wide eyes before looking back out towards the Sidra. “It’ll all still be here when we’re done. And if you’re not tired then you can even see it once the sun goes down. It looks even better.” He turned back with a slightly toothless grin and nodded enthusiastically, jumping from the side, and gripping my hand swinging from it.

Walking into the sitting room I walked the boy towards the kitchen. Already sitting on the counter was a little dinner for the boy, the House instantly knowing what was needed of it. I helped him up onto a stool he quickly dug into his dinner.

“Easy now, don’t want to eat too fast and make yourself sick,” I advised brushing a finger across his back. I walked around the counter and grabbed a small cup and filled it with water so he could drink as well.

Once he was done eating, he quickly gulped down the water and brushed his mouth on his hand, then proceeded to wipe the hand on his shirt. Boys. I grabbed him before he had a chance to run off and walked him up to mine and Azriel’s bathing room where Az sat pouring a few drops of bubbles into the bath.

I set Hawthorne down on the ground and allowed him to undress so he could climb in the bath and gave my mate a quick peck on the cheek in thanks. Admiration flowed down his side of the bond as I leaned over and started wetting Hawthorne’s hair. He splashed around a little playing with the bubbles as I washed the grime off of him.

Once I was done, I grinned and grabbed a handful of bubbles and placed them on his head. The little Illyrian quickly looked up at me and proceeded to grin. And without a moment's notice he flapped his wings in the water spraying water all over me.

We both sat in silence for a little bit, me in shock and him with a look that said, ‘Uh oh’. Then I started laughing, and Hawthorne quickly realized he wasn’t in trouble for getting water over me.

After his bath, and the fight of drying him off, and the battle of getting him dressed. I did as I had promised and walked him back to one of the balconies so he could watch the ending of the sunset and all the lights of Velaris come on. We sat quickly, him in amazement, me writing down some reports to send to Rhys in the morning.

It was in the middle of the night I was awoken to one of Azriels shadows, Azriel rousing from sleep himself and moving a wing off of me to see what was happening. Then I heard soft padding down the hall, and a shuffling of wings. I then heard the door move a bit as someone jumped and grabbed the doorknob, and the door quietly moved open.

Raising our heads, we were greeted with Hawthorne sniffling as he waddled into the room. He looked up at the two of us from the foot of the bed, glancing back and forth. I glanced at Azriel and silently asked if he’d allow the boy in the bed with us.

Azriel looked at me, then flopped back on his stomach and grumbled “Once you feed them and let them sleep in the bed, they end up staying. Look at Cass.”

I lightly slapped his arm and raised up more and nodded to my side of the bed. Hawthorne quickly shuffled over and climbed his way into the bed and my arms. “Wanna talk about it?” I quietly asked.

He shook his head and placed his wet face into my neck. I hummed an okay and moved the blankets back over us and went back to sleep, Azriel’s wing shifting back over as he moved around.

In the morning I awoke to an empty bed, not unusual with Az doing morning training, but I distinctly remember a little boy crawling into the bed in the night as well.  

Climbing out of bed, a shadow greeted me happily and started leading me in the direction of the living room; and was greeted by Cassian holding the boy in the air telling him to get ready, and Azriel sat in a chair drinking tea.

“If he breaks something Cassian, you get to tell Rhys.” I said, walking further into the room and joining Azriel on the armrest, his hand wrapping around my hip and patting it. Azriel tilted his head in a way saying, ‘That’ll be fun’ and went back to his morning readings.

“Hey, we learn to fly by being dropped from different heights, I figured you prefer it in the living room, where he could land on the couch.” The general replied, letting go of the boy and allowing him to flap-glide his way to the couch in question.

I let the two continue and looked down to my mate, “Wanna join me in the kitchen, so we could talk about H-A-W-T-H-O-R-N-E’s F-A-T-H-E-R?” He nodded his head and took my hand to lead me in the direction of said room. Already on the counter was my breakfast, courtesy of the house which I thanked, and a steaming glass of coffee.

“I went earlier this morning. He’s not wanting to give us anything. Rhys wants to make an example of them.” Azriel said going straight to the point. I looked up from putting jam on my toast, my eyes trailing to the sounds of the child’s laughter and Cassians' praise.

“What about Hawthorne?”

Azriel sighed, already knowing I wasn’t going to let this go without a fight. Either with him or our High Lord. “Rhys is going to leave that up to you. His recommendation thought was to find someplace around Velaris so he wouldn’t be in a camp where issues may arise in the future. When he’s older.”

I looked sharply up at what he said. “What is that supposed to mean?” I made sure to keep my voice somewhat low so as to not raise attention to us.

“We both know what he means. He’s just trying to cover future bases because he has Nyx now.” Azriel tried to calm down, resting a hand on top of mine. I pulled it back from him immediately.

“No Azriel I don’t know what you mean. He’s a child what are you two trying to say?” I was angry. He’s five, if that. What was there to possibly worry about to ‘keep an eye on him in the future.’

Azriel said your name then continued, “His father was plotting to get a group of people to kill Rhys. Maybe worse.” Azriel almost seemed angry at the position I had taken, in defending this threat against his High Lord. But the threat was a child.

I glared at Azriel and all but snarled when I said, “Sons are NOT their fathers Azriel. You of all people should know that.” I even pointed in his direction for emphasis on my statement, his hazel eyes going wide in surprise at it. Shock and hurt flowed down the bond, and I pushed my feelings of anger towards him.

Turning I leave my breakfast to go join Cassian and the deemed threat in the other room to watch him stretch his wings.

It was later in the evening, after playing with the child and having Cassian take us down to the shopping district so he could have more clothes that I had finally let myself think about the argument from earlier in the day. I had already put Hawthorne to bed almost two hours ago and was down in the kitchen sipping wine. Setting the glass down on the counter I ran my hands down my face in frustration, and then came some shuffling.

Turning my head, I expected Azriel but found Hawthorne. Bleary-eyed from what little sleep he got. “Hey, what are you doing back up, it’s late.”

The little dark-haired child rubbed his eyes, his other hand gripping a little black cat stuffed animal he begged to have. “I have trouble sleeping in the bed. It’s super soft.” His eyebrows furrowed together and then he said, “The shadows also keep me awake by playing with my hair.”

A few of Azriel’s shadows had taken a little liking to the boy, much unlike their master, it seemed. “Well. Since you’re awake, want some hot chocolate?” I asked, the boy seemed confused at my words and asked what hot chocolate was. “Hot cocoa?” He shook his head in confusion again.

“Come on, I’ll make us some cups and you can try it,” I said lifting him up to sit on the counter and wiped my finger at some of the dried drool on his cheek.

Turning to a cabinet, I grabbed two mugs to set beside him and continued to pull supplies out to make the cocoa. Hawthorne watched every move I made, measuring out the ingredients, putting them into a pot to warm up, and even helping stir every now and then. Once it was done, I moved it over to the side to allow it to cool a bit more before putting the drink into the mugs.

“Now here’s the fun part. I like to add some extra things to mine.”

Hawthorne seemed interested in whatever it was I was going to add.

“I like to take this white stuff, called whipped cream, and put it on top, then add this stuff here called cinnamon. Do you wanna try mine and see if you like it for yours?” I asked, Hawthorne seemed to think deeply about it, furrowed eyebrows, and all then eagerly nodded his head. I carefully handed him my cup and he took a little sip, whip cream getting on his upper lip and nose, then made a loud ‘ahh’ sound after gulping it down.

“I’d like some please!” The boy eagerly handed my mug back and watched me add it to his smaller mug.

We sat side by side sipping at our drinks, Hawthorne’s eyes drooping more and more as he drank before he set his almost empty mug on the counter and yawned.

“Ready to go back to bed?” He seemed a little hesitant and then said something that broke my heart.

“I don’t wanna sleep by myself, I’m scared someone’s going to come and get me.” He didn’t want to make eye contact.

I looked at him a little inquisitively, “Why do you think someone’s coming to get you?”

“Well, I really liked being with Daddy, even if I didn’t get much food. And then you guys came and took my daddy and me, because daddy was being bad. But you have been really nice, and Cassin has been helping me fly, and even though Azzie don’t like me he still lets me play with his shadows, and you guys have food and it’s warm-“ I stopped him before he could continue working himself up.

“Hawthorne, you don’t have to go back to the camp if you don’t want to. You know that right?” I said rubbing his hand in a comforting way.

He seemed sheepish as he nodded then asked, “I would get to stay here with you? And Cassin and Azzie?”

I sighed trying to think of an answer, “I don’t know if you’d get to stay with us. You could go to another place that would love you very much.”

Hawthorne didn’t like that answer. Tears forming in his little hazel eyes, lips wobbling, and I knew I needed to backtrack.

“Hey, how about this buddy?” He sniffed and ran a hand over his eye, “How about we pause this conversation, and me and you go sleep? Then we can talk when I get some answers.” Answers only the Inner Circle could answer.

It took Hawthorne only 20 minutes to fall back to sleep in his room and me another hour lying beside Azriel. It was early morning when I awoke to Azriel getting up himself.

“Think you could call a meeting about little bits?” I asked rubbing my hands down my face.

Azriel sighed and sat back in the bed beside me. “You shouldn’t get attached to him; you know that. And it’s not that I think that he’s going to become his father or that I hate him. I heard you guys’ last night, and what you both talked about.” He sat there for a second licking his lips as I cringed knowing he heard us, “I do like him. He’s a sweet kid, and I’m glad he’s had a better life than most Illyrians-”

I stopped him, “I didn’t mean what I said yesterday. I know you’re not your father and I should’ve never. Ever. Compared you to him.”

“I know. You were angry and believed you had to defend him. I’m proud of you for that. But if you really want to discuss what happens with him, then I think we should talk.” Azriel said, grabbing my hand and holding it as he laid back across my stomach.

I nodded, and we started talking. About all outcomes for Hawthorne. What would happen to him, how he’d be raised, all of it. Then we went to the River House. And I joined the Inner Circle as we talked about him. Rhysand’s concerns, Amren’s and Mor’s surprise, Feyre’s support in what would happen, and how it would all be dealt with.

At the end we had an answer.

It was later in the day that I asked Hawthorne if he wanted to go walk around town with Azriel. I was slowly walking behind as Azriel walked somewhat awkwardly with the boy, talking with him as Hawthorne was eagerly pointing around at different shops.

Hawthorne’s eyes widened and grabbed Azriels’ hand, the older Illyrian tensing up at the innocent little child grabbing his scarred hands and dragged him over to a bakery to press his face into the window and stare at the sweets.

“Can we go in there?” Hawthorne asked eagerly looking between Azriel and me. Azriel looked to me for some guidance, letting me control the situation. Nodding my head, Azriel led the three of us into the bakery and let the boy pick what he wanted and got me my favorite treat too.

I led Hawthorne back outside so we could eat, take in the sights, and talk to Hawthorne like we needed to.

“Hey Hawthrone, remember the conversation from last night? Can me and Azriel talk to you about it?” Hawthrone seemed more downtrodden at the reminder of last night but nodded his head.

“Hawthorne, I got to visit your dad before we left, and I just wanted you to know that he isn’t going to be able to come home. And because of that, we need to find you a good home.” Azriel started out, not telling the boy his father wasn’t going to come home. Rhys did have to make an example and couldn’t just pardon him because he had a son.

“Azriel and I have been talking with some people, and we’re wondering what you want to do,” I said, handing the boy a napkin to clean his face as he ate. He glanced between Azriel and me, then down at the table.

“Where would I go if Daddy can’t take me?” he asked shyly.

“Well, we could find you a loving home here, in the city. Where you would be cared for and get to learn all kinds of things with kids your age and everything. Another choice is we find you a home back at your camp, somewhere that’d be able to care for you, and you’d get to be with other Illyrians your age.” Hawthorne seemed to think the two options over. Then Azriel looked at me and I nodded.

“Or” Azriel started, “You could stay with us, and we could raise you. Then you’d stay with Cassian and us, get to meet the High Lord and Lady, and all our friends, while going to school here in Velaris. And in a few years, we’d take you to a camp called Windhaven and you’d train to be a warrior.” Hawthorne’s eyes got wider and wider as Azriel continued, looking back and forth between us two, his grin starting to match mine.

“So. Which would yo-“ Azriel didn’t finish as the tiny Illyrian lunged over the table into both of us.

“YOU I WANNA STAY WITH YOU!” Hawthorne yelled excitedly, gripping the both of us as I laughed.

Azriel looked at me, love flowing down the bond and him receiving the same back from me at the new addition to the family.

[hottpinkpenguin]

Letting Someone Go - Part 3

Benny Cross X Female Reader A/n: part 1 is here! part 2 is here! Word Count: 2392 Warnings: alcohol use, cursing, angsty angstiness

Johnny, Cal, and Zipco were at Junker’s Tavern when you pulled up six days later. You’d found every excuse in the book to turn what should have been a 5-hour straight shot east into a six day, meandering countryside tour. After much deliberation, you’d phoned the bar the night before from yet another shitty hotel room outside Chicago and had stammered out a request to Johnny that Benny not be there when you pull in. He hadn’t said much, just sorta grunted on the other end and fed you some bullshit about how I ain’t Benny’s goddamn keeper. But after you’d cussed him out some and asked him again, he begrudgingly agreed. You were glad, but not surprised, that he’d kept his word. Your welcome party was small, and with the noticeable exception of Brucie and Gail, those three guys were your closest pals in the Vandals. In spite of yourself, you found you were glad to see them. 

Zipco was as gruff as ever, didn’t crack a smile as he strode over to your bike with his long legs. He’d wrapped you up in a rib-cracking hug, mumbled something in your hair about how it was good to see you, and had disappeared back into the dark interior of the pub. Johnny had nodded at you stoically from the doorway. He looked about ten years older, with worry lines etched into his face and an emptiness in his eyes. Cal shot you a shy smile and an awkward wave as he came over to take your helmet. You shook out your hair from its braid, relishing the feel of your hair loosening at the roots and groaning appreciatively. You didn’t miss the way the sound made Cal squirm like a schoolboy, and it made you chuckle. 

“How you been, Cal?” you asked him with a little more flirt than you meant. It had been a long time since you’d talked to a man without trying to get him to buy you a drink or take your mind off yourself for an evening. 

He shrugged casually. “Can’t complain.”

“Mmm,” you replied in agreement. “Nobody would wanna listen anyways.” 

He scoffed as he followed you inside Junker’s. The tavern was exactly how you remembered it, down to the broken lightbulb in the back corner, the aging jukebox, the scuffed up pool table, and the neon Budweiser sign blinking erratically behind the permanently sticky bartop. 

“I see you boys been busy makin’ improvements in here,” you commented sarcastically as you joined Johnny and Zipco at their usual table. The bar was technically closed, but Johnny knew the owner, so it was yours for the afternoon. You spun your chair around so you could dangle your arms over the backrest. Zipco offered you a beer, which you accepted gratefully. Once Cal slid into a chair across from you, Johnny raised his bottle towards the center of the table.

“To Brucie,” he said softly and sadly. “The best of us.” The rest of you clinked your beers to Johnny’s, murmuring an echo of his toast. Suddenly the air in the bar felt heavy and thick around you. You couldn’t meet the eyes of the other three, and you were fairly certain their gazes were glued to the tabletop just like yours, fighting back the wave of emotions that had just swamped the room. 

Johnny cleared his throat after a few moments, breaking the tension. He turned to you, a serious look in his eyes.

“Funeral’s tomorrow,” he informed you, as if you didn’t know. You nodded, taking another generous swig of beer. 

“Whole club’s gonna be there.” It was Zipco’s turn to chime in now. You narrowed your eyes at the three men, sensing a trap. Cal was watching you gently, and something in his gaze made you want to smack him. You didn’t like the softness he seemed to be extending to you with his eyes.

“Yea, I figured as much,” you replied testily, setting your beer down a little harsher than necessary. Zipco and Johnny exchanged a glance that you didn’t miss, and it set your teeth on edge. Definitely a trap.

“Benny included.” Johnny didn’t look up at you, instead he set to picking off the label on his Pabst. You chewed on your tongue for a moment, trying to remind yourself that these three were as close to friends as you had in this world and deserved more than your anger. 

“Yea.” Unable to say more, you sat and waited. For the second time in as many minutes, the bar felt too small for the four of you. Or maybe it was too big, the size of the room and the memories of this place drowning you out and suffocating you.

“We don’t want no problems.” It was Johnny who finally spoke. His voice was even and smooth. He was nervous, you realized. Nervous about how you’d react. You exhaled slowly through your nose as you bit down on the mean things you thought about saying. Why the fuck did you invite me then, if you’re so worried about me being a problem. 

Cal’s leg was bouncing, and the keys he had hanging from his belt loop jingled softly in the late afternoon light that streamed through the lone window of the bar. You could see dust motes dancing in the sunlight, oblivious to the fact that you felt ready to split apart at the seams. The prospect of seeing Benny so soon hit you like a freight train. Were you really ready? Was Johnny right to worry about there being ‘a problem’? How were you going to react? Was she going to be there?

It was Zipco who broke the moment. He reached across the table and found your hand. You startled at the movement but didn’t pull back. He squeezed your hand reassuringly and gave you a small, conciliatory smile. 

“Our girl’s gonna be fine, Johnny,” he said with much more confidence than you felt. “She’s rock steady.” 

Suddenly there were tears welling in your eyes and you were overwhelmed with gratitude. Four years almost since you’d seen these guys. You hadn’t called once, hadn’t thought to drop a postcard in the mail just to let them know you were alive. You’d just up and left. Sure, you’d been leaving Benny. But in the process, you’d lost sight of who else you were leaving. And instead of holding it against you - or worse, forgetting about you - they’d held a place for you here. For the first time in a long time, you were surrounded by people who actually knew you, actually cared. 

You bit the inside of your lip to keep it from trembling and managed to nod in response to Zipco’s vote of confidence. He squeezed your hand again before withdrawing his. Johnny and Cal smiled at you, sensing that something had shifted inside you. You were changed, no doubt, but not totally lost. And it felt good to realize that, to remember who you were. You spent the rest of the afternoon in the quiet bar, drinking and talking stories with Zipco, Cal, and Johnny until the clock read 1:43am and you’d drunk up all the Pabst and Four Roses you could get your hands on. You crashed on Zipco’s couch that night, and as you lay there, looking up at the ceiling and waiting for the spins to stop so you could get some sleep, you came to terms with what you always knew would happen if you ever came back to Chicago:

You were home, and you weren’t leaving again. 

***********************

You woke up the morning of Brucie’s funeral with a stiff back, a throbbing headache, and a tightness in your chest. The first two you treated with four ibuprofen and a strong cup of strong, black coffee. The third one wasn’t treatable. No medicine you could take to help with a nervous broken heart. 

The entire club rode over to the funeral home where Brucie’s viewing was. Brucie’s parents had made it clear that Vandals weren’t welcome inside. 

“They don’t own the fuckin’ sidewalk, do they?” Johnny had asked with thunder in his voice as he cut the engine on his Harley in the funeral home parking lot. The new guy who’d brought the news of the Vandals specific dis-invitation to the viewing stammered out a terrified apology and retreated into the assembling MC crowd. You were trailing along beside Zipco, trying your best to stop fidgeting with the ill-fitting black dress you’d managed to scrounge out of a Goodwill bin back in Davenport. Your head was buzzing, courtesy of your hangover, the espresso-strength coffee that Zipco had made you, and a low grade terror at what you knew was only moments away. Sensing your nerves, Zipco reached back for your hand. You accepted it gratefully, feeling reassured by your old friend’s steadiness. He gently led you closer to where the Vandals, all in black, were starting to form lines flanking the entrance to the funeral home. 

“Y/n? Jesus Christ, is that you?!”

Sheila, never one for subtlety or propriety, shattered the somber mood of the crowd with a shriek of disbelief. You winced a bit, wanting nothing more than to dissolve into dust and get blown away on the next breeze. The last thing you wanted today of all days was to be the center of attention. 

Unable to ignore her, you turned towards the sound of your friend’s greeting. She slammed into you running a million miles an hour, her arms wrapping around you in a tight embrace.

“Christ almighty, I can’t believe you’re here! When did you get back?” 

“Sheila, ssh, just keep it down-”

“I know, I know, I just can’t believe it! I haven’t seen you in, well- jeeze, how long’s it been?”

“Four years,” you mumbled, feeling small. It felt real shitty to tell someone you were supposed to have been close with that it had been years - literal years - since you’d last seen them. 

“Four years, Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ, you’re right!” Sheila’s voice was getting louder as her excitement was bubbling up again. 

Eager to distract her, you reached for the first inane question you could think of. “So, anyways, how you been doin’, you still hangin’ with the club then?”

“Oh yeah, well, I guess you wouldn’t know, but yea, Wahoo and I got married!” She flashed a ring in your face with a giddy grin. “Yea, it took a while, y’know how men are, but after about two years of datin’ I says to him ‘listen, Beau, you’re either in or you’re out, stop draggin’ your feet already’. And yea, maybe like a week later I had this little beaut on my finger and-”

Halfway through Sheila’s rambling story, the ground opened up and swallowed you whole. You were nervously glancing around the crowd, trying to stay as close to Zipco as you could physically manage and trying desperately to keep Sheila from causing too much of a ruckus, when you locked eyes with him. After all these years, Benny was still as devastating as ever, with his hair a little longer and his smile a little softer than the last time you’d seen him. You’d know him anywhere. Hell, you’d know Benny Cross in the dark.

For a split second, you saw him before he saw you. In the next instant, those blue eyes locked with yours. Your grip tightened like a vice on Zipco’s hand. Sheila was still yammering at you, but your ears felt stuffed with cotton and your head a million miles away. All you could do was look at him, your eyes greedily roaming over his face, desperately memorizing everything about him as if you’d never get another chance again. 

Benny’s expression was unreadable. He held your gaze calmly. You knew you shouldn’t, but you tried to swim into his eyes to see if there was anything like guilt in those two blue oceans. Didn’t he feel the least bit bad for what he’d done? Didn’t he know that you’d barely survived these last four years? Didn’t he care?

You weren’t sure how long you looked at Benny. It could have been seconds or eons. However long it was, it wasn’t nearly enough. There was a bottomless, demanding hunger for more of him deep in your gut. You felt like you could literally crawl into his skin alongside him and it wouldn’t be enough. It was maddening, desperate and overwhelming. And to add salt to the wound, Benny gave you nothing. A barely-there smile that could have said anything: amusement, pity, discomfort, adoration, apathy. Eyes that slid past you, through you, and over you easily as he made idle conversation with the other Vandals and watched Brucie’s casket pass by. You couldn’t read anything in him, and it threatened to crush what few pieces of yourself you had left.

You tried your best to turn your head towards Brucie, but it was no good. Brucie deserved better from you, you knew it, and there was no help for it. You were lost in Benny again. It had taken you fifteen months to meet him, love him, and lose him. Four years to race against the crushing heartbreak that threatened to swamp you. And less than a heartbeat to fall back in love with him. 

It wasn’t until Zipco literally dragged you away from the funeral home that your head came plunging out of the clouds. You were sure you looked half-crazed, craning your neck to catch one more glimpse of Benny before the crowd swallowed him up amidst the roar of a dozen or so motorcycles coming to life. He didn’t bat an eye at your absence. It made you wish you could burst into flames, just to see if he’d react, burns and agony be damned. 

You didn’t notice anything on the ride home. The wind tore at your face and ripped out tears. After a few agonizing moments, you lay your head against Zipco’s back with an exhausted sigh and willed the world to drown itself out. Another realization buried itself deep in your bones as you let the bike and the asphalt and the wind and Zipco lull you to sleep:

You were home, you weren’t leaving, and it was probably going to be the death of you.

**read part 4 here

Taglist: @real-lana-del-rey @putherup @dontcrydaddy @gilli-vanilli @faephoria @summer56 @seresinhangmanjake @patrycqv @rose-deathman

[whowantslovergirl]

Casual

Paige Bueckers x reader (reader is female with she/her pronouns)

warnings: angst, italics are flashbacks, no happy ending, loosely based on a true story 🤣, paige is SUPER clueless,suggestive but no smut so tht one part will not be in this story, cursing, again paige is kinda mean in this, NOT ASSUMING HER SEXUALITY THIS IS PURELY FOR THE STORY gonna make a new masterlist once there’s more stories 😫

Summary: Y/n knew what her and Paige had but she never wanted that and Paige just wanted this casual

posted: May 30,2024

This has been going on for months. Ever since I hooked up with Paige we had this little thing going on. Then I did the one thing you shouldn’t, catch feelings. Technically it’s not my fault she shouldn’t be acting like a girlfriend, giving me gifts, taking me on surprise dates and even saying ‘I love you.’ I mean my friends call me a loser 'cause I'm still hanging around. Which is completely understandable it’s been like six months and she hasn’t asked me to be her girlfriend.

______

“Oh that’s Paige’s girl.”

“Yea Paige is dating that chick over there.”

“I heard they’re not even together yet.”

Every single day. I walk around campus and I hear the same thing. “That’s Paige’s girl.” Like my name is Y/n.

Then you heard someone say.

“Paige said she’s just fucking her nothing more nothing less.”

What the hell. I've heard so many rumors that I'm just a girl that you bang on your couch but I never believed it was true. You texted Paige saying you’re coming over and she said okay see you soon.

______

“Why would you say shit like that?!” This always happens we always get into an argument about something she said or something I did. It’s like a routine.

“Well are we not just fucking Y/n?!” Paige yelled back. Then you started to tear up. “Well I- I thought you thought of me better, you know like someone you couldn't lose or something.”

She shook her head and took my hands in hers. “I don’t know what you wanna hear Y/n.”

"We're not together"

Well that hurt. “Yea I know Paige. It just hurts that you see me like that.”

“I don’t but- but I do love you. You know that right?” I nodded and leaned forward. “I love you too Paige.” She smiled and connected our lips.

So now when we kiss, I have anger issues.

_____

“Baby, no attachment”

Those three words make me madder than I ever been in my life. I should leave but to be honest I don’t want too. I mean I always had a crush on Paige and when something finally happened I never been so happy. But at the same time.

Is it casual now?

I remember when we just started messing around and in two weeks, and your mom invites me to her house on Long Beach.

Is it casual now?

______

I know what you tell your friends

“So what’s going on with you and Y/n.” Azzi asked. They were always curious about your… relationship? So they always asked you or Paige what’s going on. Paige shrugged.

“It's casual.”

They didn’t say anything just nodded when they know damn well what Paige and Y/n have is not casual.

_____

Dumb love, I love being stupid.

Sometimes I like to dream of us in a year. You know maybe we'd have an apartment.

And you'd show me off to your friends at the pier.

I walked into our apartment and Paige is already coming up to me giving me hugs and kisses.

“Hey baby how was work?” You shook your head. “Stressful but you know it happens.”

_____

“Come on! They’ll love you I promise.” Paige was showing you off to her new team. “Y/n!”

“Y/n!” I see my friend waving her hand in my face.

Well shit.

______

Paige and I just finished doing our thing and I was putting my (her) shirt on. “Hey so do you wanna go on a date or something?” Paige asked me and I nodded. Usually we do casual dates so it wouldn’t hurt doing a serious one right?

“Do you wanna go to a restaurant or something.” I saw the panic in her face and she immediately shut that idea down.

“Baby, no attachment.”

I rolled my eyes. “Didn’t know going to a restaurant was being attached.” I got all my stuff and left before she could stay anything.

Who asks to go on date then talk about being attached? Fucking idiot.

Is it casual now?

______

Two weeks, and your mom invites me to her house on Long Beach.

You just started your ‘relationship’ with Paige Bueckers. Two weeks in and her mom is asking you to go on vacation.

Is it casual now?

______

I know what you tell your friends.

“And she just stormed off like a kid bro. Just because I didn’t wanna go to a restaurant.” Paige was telling Azzi about your recent argument. Azzi just looked at her. “What?” Paige asked.

“Well what did you say for her to storm off P?” She shrugged. “I told her she shouldn’t get attached.” She said looking down and mumbling. Azzi looked at her again. “How is wanting to go to a restaurant being attached?”

“She said the same thing! Look, it's casual going to a restaurant is what couples do and we are not a couple.”

“Maybe she doesn’t wanna be casual Paige.”

And that’s what scared her.

______

It's hard being casual

When my favorite bra lives in your dresser

I was getting ready to go out with some friends and was looking for the bra that makes my boobs look big then I remembered that it’s probably at Paige’s which is not good because we are currently not talking.

Whatever I need my bra back.

______

“What are you doing here?” Fuck why does she have to look so hot. “Don’t cream your pants I need my bra.” She just moves out of the way.

I got my bra and was trying to leave but Paige grabbed my arm. “So where are you going dressed like that?” Is she serious?

“I’m going out with friends.” She nodded. “I miss you Y/n.”

“Ok” and you left.

And it's hard being casual

______

“Im so tired of this shit Paige!”

You’re finally confronting Paige about this thing you have going on due to your friends hyping you up.

“Tell her you’re over this shit Y/n!”

“It’s been too long for her not to do shit.”

“Tired of what Y/n?!”

“You! This has been going on for months. Almost a year and you still think this is a casual thing?!”

“If it bothered you so much why didn’t you say anything?!”

“Because Paige I try to be the chill girl that holds her tongue and gives you space.”

Before she could say anything you cut her off.

“I try to be the chill girl but honestly, I'm not.” You started to tear up and she noticed but didn’t say or do anything.

“Well I didn’t want to lead you on-.”

“But you did Paige.”

“Two weeks, and your mom invites me to her Long Beach house and you don’t think that’s leading someone on.”

“And I know what you tell your friends. You probably told them it’s casual right?” She looked down avoiding all possible eye contact. “What we have is not casual Paige and you know that.”

“You knew what this was Y/n. And what we have is casual or so I thought!”

You rolled your eyes. “Oh please I fucked you in the bathroom when we went to dinner and you told me you loved me. That’s not what casual is!”

She ran her hands over her face knowing you were right.

Your parents at the table, you wonder why I'm bitter

You’re at dinner with Paige’s parents and before you got here. We got into a huge argument about… honestly I don’t remember but I do know that it was her fault and I’m mad at her. You had been a little rude to her parents but they know you didn’t mean it.

After a while Paige pulled me to the bathroom obviously fed up.

“What the hell bro. I get you’re mad at me but don’t take it out on my parents.” You didn’t say anything and just went back to the table.

“I just want to say sorry for the way I acted today.” They assured you that it’s okay and they know you mean no harm.

Paige wondered why you were being so bitter.

But she didn’t do anything to fix it.

Bragging to your friends

“Yea we’re like doing this thing and like I’m so happy I did it!” Then Paige went on and on and on about you basically bragging. The team was obviously not going along with that, shutting it down immediately.

I hate that I let this drag on so long, now I hate myself

“Hate that I let this drag on so long, you can go to hell!!”

You pushed her out the door and slammed it in her face.

Note to self: never be in a ‘casual’ relationship.

An: ENJOYYYYY MY LOVERS 🤍🤍🤍 but definitely making a wbb masterlist maybe emily engstlers next who knows…

[gargoyleofgotham]

Little doll

The opposite of a neglected reader fic where the Batfam are consistently trying to get to know you (after “accidentally” doing some kidnapping. It’s started by a miscommunication because they’re all simultaneously geniuses and stupid, and then the reader goes along with it because they’re silly) and you keep trying to shove them off and leave after getting bored. -no gender mentioned for reader, no use of y/n

-Tw: brief mentions of creeps, reader feels like they’re being watched

You probably should have thought a bit more before going anywhere with Asher. He was stupid and impulsive (at least you two had that in common,) and with his memory problems, probably wouldn’t even remember to pick you up. For all you knew, he might not remember dropping you off at the library anyways, and it could be a few hours until someone else managed to come find you. You clutch your doll closer and steel your gaze on your book, even if your gaze flickers up every time someone walked by. 

After an hour or so, you’re sick of it. Normally, you could stay in a library for plenty of time, reading books or looking at pictures depending on your mood, but right now you’re a bit too preoccupied for that. So you decide to at least preoccupy yourself with something useful. If you walk around enough, you should be able to find a store your father has some hold in and find someone with his number who you can get to call him.

As you walk down the streets, you start to get a feeling you’re being watched. You don’t like that in general, but feeling that that in the streets of a city like this? That’s even worse.

As the prickling up your spine gets deeper, you go with your first idea and try to assimilate yourself into the group of people standing in front of the next shop. You slide in to stand next to two boys with dark hair and act like they’re relevant to you until the feeling eventually subsides. You were so focused on the creeping dread that you didn’t even notice the gaggle of people had noticed you come into their little group until one of them spoke. “Hello?”

You wave politely and mumble under your breath about just trying to hide from creeps, and go to leave, before one puts a hand on your shoulder. Your heart stops a beat.

“Yea? Do you need help finding your parents?” The oldest one in the group- you assume they’re all a family, and based on age, this is probably the father- asks. He seems well-meaning, but you don’t know if that’s enough right now.

Technically, you do need help finding your parents, but you don’t think you want random strangers helping with that. Maybe it’s just because it’s reliable, but you feel like you have a better chance finding a store your father owns. “Uh… no thanks.”

A few of the people look between each other; they don’t even try to hide it. Two or three of them speak at once, blurting out questions like “are you an orphan?” and “why, are they bad to you?”

Technically, you are also an orphan. You can’t really see what that has to do with anything, so you hesitantly reply “yes? To the… orphan question.”

Most of the group look at each other and nod. Ominous. “Well, you’re getting adopted now. No question about it.” One tuts, while another rolls their eyes. Someone sighs while another mumbles about letting people know, and a few other people say things you can’t hear over everyone else.

This is moving pretty fast, and you could stop it all with a few words, but you, for now, decide to keep your mouth shut about how just because you’re an orphan doesn’t mean you don’t have caretakers. This is getting interesting, and even if not biologically, you’re your father’s child; you can’t help but want to cause a little mischief and see what happens.

Please feel free to comment, I really like when people interact with me, I promise I don’t bite

Also, this is my first fanfic, and I’m aware I have a very robotic writing style sometimes (probably due to all of the essays I have to write) so if you feel like anything could be said better, please let me know, as well as any tips you may have

[hyuckswoman]

« i’m so stupid to have believed you when you said you would only take a minute  to get ready » your friend hanbin says

the both of you were currently heading towards the gymnasium, actually going to see the basketball match instead of changing your plans last minute like the both of you usually do 

« what can I say? a lady must take her time upon preparing herself » you answer slightly shoving your friend as yes, technically he did have every right to complain but he had been doing so for the past half an hour. 

« lady my ass, you still look just as ugly » your friend says as you gasp and before you could even respond, somebody had beat you to it 

« y/n is not ugly how dare you say that » your friend jaemin (whom you had not seen) accompanied by his 5 friends greeted you 

« yea listen to jaemin i am not ugly » you retorted as hanbin just rolled his eyes and sighed

« what brings you here? I don’t think I’ve ever seen you at a game before » jisung asks, curious and lowkey surprised to see you in an athletic vicinity (the man did not think of you as highly athletic you presume)

« some guy tried to ask her out and since she wasn’t down he also asked me to go to the game with her so we’re here now » hanbin replies all too nonchalantly, you’re low key appalled at the twisted version of the events your friend is telling. 

« that is quite literally not what happened, the guy you see over there just told me i should come to the game and invite hanbin too » you reply clarifying 

« sooo, it’s exactly as hanbin described it » mark said. 

you couldn’t have your man think that he has any competition when it comes to you (not that he cares anyway, this is very much a one sided relationship and you know it). but still, upon seeing the five other men nod you truly start to wonder if all of them are just collectively stupid because they’re men or if you’re the one that’s being dense 

« OH! you’ll get to meet chenle, he’s been wanting to meet you for awhile- speak of the devil there he is! » your friend jaemin starts then waves at a man that is currently running towards all of you 

« you guys actually came -» chenle starts before being cut off by hyuck « yea we did » . while all of the guys sigh and shake their heads you’re snickering as that is 100% a joke you could’ve made yourself, and meeting eyes with your friend hanbin that’s giving you a look that screams ‘this is a joke you could’ve made’ gives you all the reassurance you would need. 

the loud noises erupting from the stadium managed to drown out the voices of the friend group in front of you. it isn’t until you hear your name being said that you realize not only where you are but who you’re with 

« it’s good to meet you, i was feeling left out as i was the only one who hadn’t met you yet. I wish i could speak more but i need to go back to stretch a bit before the match, talk to you after? » chenle asks, to which you only nod before he scurries back to his team

that’s right, chenle IS a basketball player of course his friends would be there.. 

« cmon guys, let’s go sit » jeno hurries all of you as he wants to get good seats before ‘the fangirls arrive’ (you secretly thank god the man doesn’t know about your little mark obsession seeing how he feels towards the basketball groupies)

« dude what if during the game a basketball comes flying to your head and your man catches it going like ‘you alright’ tryna rizz you up just like the meme you posted on twitter yesterday » hanbin whispers, still all too loudly for your liking tho 

« i beg of you to shut the fuck up the man is quite literally three people away from you » you whisper back slightly pinching his arm as he winces in pain.

 you can’t have mark know about your delusions. ever. 

and even though the seating system (hanbin, you, jaemin, jisung, mark, haechan and jeno) would make it difficult for mark to hear the whispers you share about him you don’t want to take any chances. you are practically surrounded by his friends after all. 

and two hours later the match was done, chenle’s team winning of course and you were heading out when the guys stopped both you and hanbin 

« we’re going to celebrate, not sure how yet but you guys wanna join? » jeno asks and hanbin agrees without even caring if you wanted to join them or not. when confronting him the only thing he replied was «what? we’ll probably get free food or drinks outta this, you should thank me ». the audacity of a bitch. 

25. the game

previous chapter masterlist next chapter

notes: i'm back with another (written chapter) hope you guys don't mind the written bits cause there are more coming lol (also sorry to user @jising-jisang-jisung i really tried to make mark say it but i couldn't so.. sorry)

also to the anon that requested the jaehyun or huyk fic i am working on that i'm sorry to be so slow i'll try to publish it asap!

as always, requests/reaction/anything are open and appreciated!! hope you guys have/had a lovely day!

taglist (open): @imsiriuslyreal @iscocohere @simpforarmihn @replayenthusiast @lovm4rk @youreintheclubb @polarisjisung @sour-chaos @jising-jisang-jisung @aerivrs @multifandomania @tiddygang2020 @roseangelxfuma @skepvids @morkiee @yangasm @artstaeh @pussyslayerhd @bacons-thighs @bugcattie @leefullsun @jkslvsnella @alethea-moon @marvelahsobx @haechansbbg

[sethsclearwater]

poly!paulxreaderxseth where she just had her first baby and someone is jokingly asking the two of them who's baby it is and they both completely misunderstand what they're asking and are like "that is HER baby have you seen how protective she is? she barely even lets us hold him" and reader is just quietly giggling and she's sitting by them with her baby😭😭

PLEASE😭😭

...

you, paul, and seth had gone out for the first time with your newborn to a small bonfire at la push beach, hosted by none other than emily young.

the four of you had arrived about an hour after it started thanks to your baby being unusually fussy that afternoon and your hormones going absolutely haywire over the thought of him possibly getting sick from going out.

seth and paul were awfully supportive though, taking a bit of a 'divide and conquer' approach where seth went to calm your baby down and paul sat with you to get you calmed enough to go out.

when the four of you finally did arrive at la push, you were quick to sit down with your baby near emily and embry, knowing both of them were the more understanding ones of the pack and empathized with your concerns as a new mom.

while you sat down on one of the picnic blankets with emily, giving your baby his bottle as the two of you talked about everything that had been going on with the pack recently, paul and seth were dragged over to introduce themselves to a few new friends of jacob's.

thankfully, they were only a few feet away so you could see and hear them from your spot on the picnic blanket. emily had quickly gotten up to grab you something to eat while you continued to feed your baby his bottle.

"so who's baby is it then?" you heard one of the new boys ask and you peeked up at that to see what was going on. you hadn't bothered to get a paternity test with your baby seeing as you, paul, and seth weren't particularly concerned with who's baby it technically was because both boys would be raising your baby with you.

paul and seth though, seemed to miss the entire point of the boy's question as seth responded, "that's her baby," he laughed, looking over at paul who also seemed just as clueless as seth to what the boy was asking.

paul jumped in then, "have you seen how protective she is of that baby? she barely even lets us hold him," he mused and you let out a soft giggle at his comment, smiling down at your baby who was just finishing up his bottle.

before the boy could rephrase his question, your baby started whimpering and quickly went into full blown crying which had both paul and seth coming over to you.

"it's okay, it's okay," you quietly cooed, gently rocking your baby as both boys sat down next to you, both wearing matching concerned expressions as they watched you calm your newborn down.

"you want me to take him?" paul asked, both boys already knowing how stressed and anxious you were about going out in public for the first time with your baby.

you shook your head, "can you just grab his pacifier from the bag? i still need to burp him but he's gonna want that," you said and paul nodded, getting up to go grab your diaper bag and find the said pacifier from it.

seth leaned over, pressing a gentle kiss to your shoulder, "you're doing great," he reassured, gently running his hand up and down your back as your baby slowly calmed himself down.

you let out a soft sigh, peeking over at seth, "thank you," you murmured and he smiled, pressing a quick kiss to your lips.

"just let me know when you want to leave and we'll go home, yea?" he asked softly and you nodded, leaning into his side as paul came back over with your baby's pacifier in his hand, looking awfully victorious for such a small accomplishment.

you giggled when you saw him, "thank you," you said softly, smiling when he bent over to press a gentle kiss to your lips before sitting back down next to you while you burped your baby so the three of you could enjoy your first night out as new parents.

[merrybloomwrites]

Little Things (Chapter 2)

Summary: It's time for you to leave the shelter to move into your new home with your doms, Harry and Louis. It's a tough transition, but the two of them are there to help you through it.

Word Count: 3.5K

CW: mentions of past abuse, dom/sub au dynamics, mentions of littlespace

Previous chapters: one

AN: Thank you to all who showed interest in the first chapter of this! I've had a lot of ideas in mind for this story and I'm happy to finally be sharing them.

This wasn't supposed to get posted until next Friday but I got impatient and I make the rules, so here it is now! Also I'm finishing the third chapter right now, which is finally all about reader going into little headpsace, and will probably post that tomorrow

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You sit in your room at the shelter, trying not to stress over what just happened. Ms. Emily had brought you to her office where you met two men, two doms named Harry and Louis who were married. She had explained they were looking to adopt a sub. More specifically, they wanted to adopt a little.

And while you technically fell into that category, you knew they wouldn’t want you. Doms looking for littles want someone who is in headspace a lot. And you never slip if you can help it. 

You’ve only gone into your littlespace three times since you were rescued. Ms. Emily was there each time, and she took care of you and always reassured you once you came back up, but you still didn’t like it. You felt like a burden, and you were scared of how you acted. You don’t feel like yourself when you slip. It’s like this whole other person takes over and you just have to watch as she basically possesses your body.

So yea, there’s no way these doms will choose you. Years of abuse have broken you, made you into a bad sub who’s unworthy of love and care.

The afternoon passes with you dwelling on these thoughts. 

Which is why you’re shocked to your core when Ms. Emily comes back and asks if you’d like to live with Louis and Harry. 

“They don’t want me,” you answer.

“Now why would you say that?” she asks.

“I’m not good enough. I’ll never be what they’re looking for. I can’t be.”

Emily wraps her arms around you, and you lean into her. It had taken a while for you to get comfortable with hugs, but she’d worked with you for weeks and now it doesn’t feel so weird. It feels kind of nice to be held by her. 

“Sweetheart,” she begins. “You are good enough. You are worthy of love, Y/N. And that’s what Harry and Louis want to give you.” 

“Wait, what?” You pull back enough to look her in the eyes and say, “What do you mean?”

She smiles and says, “They’d like to adopt you.”

“No way. Why would they choose me?”

“Well they were moved by your story-”

You cut her off to say, “So they know. They know how messed up I am. Do they just feel bad for me? Pity me?”

“No, honey. It’s not that. First of all, you are not messed up. You had a lot of messed up stuff happen to you, but you survived that. And they don’t pity you. But they do see someone deserving of a loving home, and that is what they have to offer.”

“They really want me?” you ask, needing to hear it again.

“Yes, Y/N. They want you. Didn’t hesitate, didn’t need any time to think it over. They met you and knew you were the match for them.” Tears fill your eyes as you listen to Emily. Never before had you been wanted. Your family hadn’t wanted you, the one sub amongst all the older dom siblings. They didn’t love you, just used you to fulfill their sick fantasies. 

But Louis and Harry. They want you. They’re choosing you. And though you’re scared, worried that you’ll disappoint them, hope begins to fill you. For the first time, you may have a true home. So when Ms. Emily asks you again if you want to live with them, you immediately say yes.

You don’t get to go with them right away though. They come back the next day to spend time with you and help you feel more comfortable with them. They’re kind, and gentle, and you like being with them. 

On Friday they come again and this time you leave the shelter with them to go to lunch. It’s weird being out in public, especially when they explain who they are and that they’re famous. This makes you feel nervous, but they reassure you that your safety and privacy is a top priority for them. 

One thing you notice is that they never tell you what to do. You’re always given choices, and they ask you questions, wanting to know your opinion. They let you choose the restaurant and allow you to pick anything off of the menu. 

And while it’s nice that they’re giving you freedom, it makes you a bit uncomfortable. It’s not in your nature to make so many decisions, and truthfully, it has you feeling fatigued. You wish that they’d tell you what to do, make the decisions for you. That’s the way it should be. They’re the doms, and you’re the sub. 

Back at the shelter that night you talk to Ms. Emily about those feelings. She says that you shouldn’t be afraid to tell them about your needs. That they’ll want to listen and do what is best for you. 

You spend the weekend preparing to leave the shelter for good, as you’ll be leaving Monday afternoon to go to Harry and Louis’ home. It’s weird to leave here, as it’s the first place you’ve ever felt safe. But you know that this has always been the goal. To find a permanent home, a family of your own. 

It’s sad saying goodbye to Ms. Emily, but she reassures you that she will keep in touch and you’ll still see her. She’s surprised when you go back for one more hug, but holds you tight for a moment and lets herself feel the pride at how far you’ve already come. 

The boys lead you to the car, where two other people wait. Louis introduces them as a driver and a security guard. You’re wondering if this is normal, and like he can read your mind, Louis adds, “We’re just being extra cautious today. It’s our first time being responsible for someone else, I hope you don’t mind us going a bit overboard.”

“No, it’s okay. I don’t mind,” you reply.

“Well then, let’s get you home,” Harry says. The three of you slide in the backseat. You’re in the middle squished between the two. Before you can click in your seatbelt, you find Louis has grabbed it to do it for you. It’s a caregiver move for sure, and you once again hope they won’t be disappointed if you’re unable to be little in the way they want. 

It’s a quiet drive, and you sit as still as possible to not bring any attention to yourself. It’s something you’d learned growing up and it’s a hard habit to break.

Finally the car pulls into a long, gated driveway. Based on that, you’re expecting a huge mansion, but you’re pleasantly surprised to see a nice, cute, albeit fairly large, house. Big enough to hold a fair number of people, but not so enormous as to be overwhelming or garish. 

Harry leads you inside while Louis grabs your bag from the car. You stand just inside the doorway, looking around while waiting for instructions from your doms on what to do next, where you’re allowed to go.

It’s a relief when Louis says, “Let’s do a little tour, shall we?”

He and Harry lead you from room to room, starting with all the main spaces downstairs. There’s the living room, kitchen, dining room, library, den, laundry room, and two bathrooms. They also show you the door that leads out to the backyard, and they reassure you that it’s completely private. You peer at the high fence that surrounds the entire property, and for a second you feel uneasy. If something goes wrong, if they’re not as nice as they seem, you’ll be trapped. But you try to push those thoughts away. They’ve been nothing but kind. They’re nothing like your family. They won’t hurt you.

Next you’re led upstairs to be shown all the bedrooms. There’s two guest rooms, Harry and Louis’ room, and then they end with yours. It’s bigger than you’d expected, a large bed and a matching dresser and desk. There’s a bookshelf filled with a mix of novels and picture books. The more you look, the more you pick up on things that indicate this is a room for a little.

The dresser is low, and the top is soft, showing that it doubles as a changing table. There are toys suited for a young child. The bed has removable railings that can be put in place when you’re little to make sure you don’t fall out of bed. And then you notice the camera.

Harry sees you look at it with trepidation and says, “That will only be turned on when you’re little. The rest of the time we’ll keep it off so you can have privacy. It’s just to make sure you’re safe. Is that alright?”

“Yes, that’s fine,” you reply. It makes you more uncomfortable that he’s asking you for your opinion. He’s the dominant here, you’re the submissive. If they wanted to keep a camera on at all times that’s well within their right to do so. It’s strange to you that they keep giving you so many choices, and you wish they wouldn’t. 

“What’s wrong?” Louis asks, picking up on your discomfort.

“Nothing,” you quickly reply, not wanting to seem ungrateful by complaining.

“Why don’t we all sit and chat for a bit?” Harry says.

“Okay,” you reply.

“Would you be more comfortable here or in the living room?” he asks. 

Again with the choices. Even something as simple as that is weighing on you. Before you can control it you’re shouting out, “Please stop!” 

Immediately you’re horrified by your outburst. You’d misbehaved, surely you’re going to be punished, or maybe even sent back. You couldn’t even last an hour without ruining it. You look up in horror and begin to apologize, saying, “I’m sorry. Sir, I am so, so sorry. I didn’t- I don’t know what that was. Please, don’t send me back, I’ll be better.” 

The room is silent for a moment, no one knowing how to handle this situation. 

“Y/N, sit down,” Louis finally says. You do as you’re told, sitting on the edge of the bed. There’s a rocking chair in the corner of the room you’re facing, and Louis sits there, leaning forward towards you. Harry stands between, letting Louis take control from the moment.

“First of all, we will not be sending you back,” Louis says. “You live here now, with us. And while in the future you may be punished for speaking to us like that, you won’t be this time. You’re learning, and this is an adjustment for everyone. Obviously something is bothering you, but we can’t fix that unless you communicate with us. Y/N, please tell us what is wrong.”

“You keep asking me questions. Wanting me to choose things,” you answer.

“And would you rather us make the decisions?” he asks and you nod yes. 

Harry speaks next and asks, “Is it because you think we should be in charge and always tell you what to do?” 

“Well, yeah. Subs aren’t supposed to have freedom. We’re supposed to do what doms tell us to do,” you explain.

Harry moves closer, crouching down right beside you. He looks up, starts to move his hand like he’s reaching for you but decides against it. “Sweetheart, of course you have freedom. We aren’t like other dominants. We don’t believe that you’re less than us. You get to have opinions, you get to have control over your life.”

You listen and think about what he’s saying. It scares you, the idea of running your own life. You imagine what that will be like, how loud and confusing your mind will be trying to figure out what to do, what you want. 

“That’s too much,” you say. “Too much pressure. I could choose wrong. Please don’t make me do that.”

Louis speaks up again and says, “Would you feel better if we made the decisions? Set rules and routines for you to follow?”

You imagine that, simply fulfilling what they tell you to do, and everything goes calm, quiet. Peace washes over you at the thought, and so you answer, “Yes. I want to do as I’m told. It’s in my nature.”

They both smile as you say that. Because you’re right. And they’re proud of you for knowing that and having the courage to express your needs. 

“Then we can do that,” Harry says. “Here’s what we’ll do for now. There’s about an hour until dinner. You stay here for half an hour to settle and then come down to the living room until the food is ready. That way you can get comfortable with both of those spaces. After dinner we’ll sit and go over rules and routines.”

“Yes sir,” you reply. 

“Y/N, I’d like for you to call me Harry. Titles like sir will be reserved for punishments, and we can discuss what you’ll call us when you’re in littlespace. But for the most part, you’re to call me Harry.”

“Same goes for me. Well, no, I mean, call me Louis. It’d be a bit confusing if you were to call me Harry, huh?” Louis says, causing all of you to laugh. The tension breaks and Harry and Louis both stand to leave.

“We’ll be in the kitchen if you need us for anything. You may come find us at any time,” Harry says.

“I’ll drop off your bag in a minute,” Louis says and they both walk out of the room. 

There’s a bathroom attached to your room so you first use that. When you walk back out, your bag is sitting on the bed. You neatly put away what little belongings you have, noticing the dresser and closet are filled with clothes for you. It doesn’t escape you that some are a much younger style, clearly meant for when you slip into headspace. 

Sighing, you close up those drawers and lay on the bed. It’s comfy, soft with lots of pillows and a pretty floral comforter. And it’s a space all your own, something you’ve never had before. You stay there and relax until a timer goes off. You grab it from the bedside table and make your way down to the living room.

Louis is waiting there for you and seeing you enter right on time he says, “That’s a good girl, listening so well to directions. We’d like you to use this time to work on something, either read a book or do a puzzle. Something to keep your mind active. Would you like me to choose for you?”

You think for a minute and reply, “I’d like to do a puzzle. But can you please pick which one?”

“Of course, love,” he says as he walks over to one of the shelves. He looks for a moment then grabs a box and says, “Here, this one’s nice.”

“Thank you, Louis.” 

“I’m going to see if Harry needs my help. You get started on this.”

You sit on the floor in front of the coffee table and begin to pull out the edge pieces. Getting lost in the task, you jump when Harry walks in saying, “Dinner’s ready.” Seeing that he’s startled you he then says, “Sorry, love, didn’t mean to scare you. Did you do all of that in just a few minutes? Good job!”

You’ve completed the entire outline and were starting to sort the inner pieces by shape, a trick one of the other subs at the shelter had taught you. And while you’d made progress, it was only a puzzle. Nothing really to be proud about, but there’s Harry, looking like you’ve solved world hunger. It makes you feel warm inside, this praise that they seem to give quite freely. 

“C’mon, you can leave that here to work on again later. Go wash up and meet us in the dining room,” Harry says. You do as you’re told and the scent that hits you once you get to the table has your mouth watering.

Growing up you’d been fed enough to sustain you. Never anything fancy or particularly tasty. It was for survival, not enjoyment.

The food at the shelter was good, definitely tastier than you’d ever had before.

But this, whatever Harry has made, looks a thousand times better than even the best food at the shelter. The three of you sit and eat, Harry and Louis supplying most of the conversation, which you’re grateful for. When it’s done they tell you to head back to the living room and they’ll meet you after they clean up.

“Can I help clean?” you ask. You feel bad that you haven’t done anything to help so far, and you’re hoping to pitch in now so you feel less like a freeloader. 

“Not tonight love. Later we’ll talk about the different jobs you’ll have around the house, but none of that will start until we’ve all discussed it,” Louis answers. 

“I understand,” you say and turn to head to the living room as you were told. You work on the puzzle more until both Harry and Louis join you. 

“Have a seat there,” Louis says, pointing to the armchair. They sit on the couch across from it, ensuring that you can see both of them clearly for this conversation. 

“It’s become clear that you do well with set boundaries and routine, is that fair to say?” Harry asks.

You nod, and Harry adds, “First rule, always respond verbally unless you’re too young mentally to do so.”

“Yes, sir,” you answer quickly.

“Y/N, you’re not in trouble, you don’t have to call me sir. You’re still learning,” Harry says.

“Let’s go over the rules we have and the schedule we’ve made up for you,” Louis quickly says. 

For the next half hour the three of you talk. They explain all of the expectations they have for you, and give you papers with your rule list and daily schedule so you can keep those in your room to refer to when needed. 

“Of course, all of this will be changed and adjusted when you’re in littlespace, but if you’re old enough to follow a certain rule then you’ll still be expected to follow it,” Louis says after everything is discussed.

You don’t reply, looking down at the papers you’re holding instead.

“What is it, what’s wrong?” Harry asks.

You take a deep breath and begin to explain why that might not happen often. “I don’t go into headspace much. When I was with my family they would just leave me alone and I’d wake up starving and a mess, and well, you can imagine. Or they’d do things to me because I couldn’t fight back. So I trained myself not to slip. Even now I try not to. It scares me to be so vulnerable. So just, please don’t be disappointed if I’m not as much of a little as you were hoping for.”

Neither of them answer you so you finally look up. You’re not prepared to see tears streaming down Harry’s face or swimming in Louis' eyes. Their reactions have you wanting to break down, but you can’t. Not now. Not yet. You look back at the papers in your lap and distract yourself by studying the rules until both doms have stopped their tears.

Louis is the first to speak. “Y/N, we don’t have any sort of expectations for you. If you do slip, or you don’t slip, that’s fine with us. We’re prepared to take care of you no matter what. Your safety and happiness is what matters.” Harry nods along with him to show that he agrees with everything Louis is saying.

“Thank you,” is all you manage to say. For now, you hope that it’s enough. 

“It’s been a long day,” Harry says. “And according to your schedule it’s time to get ready for bed. C’mon, we’ll head up with you.”

The three of you go upstairs, and the boys remain in your bedroom while you get ready in the bathroom. When you’re finished you see that they’ve pulled back the covers, and it looks so cozy and inviting.

“If you’re comfortable with it, we’d like to tuck you in each night,” Louis explains. “We feel it’s a good way for us to connect with you. Plus it just seems like a nice way to wind down at the end of the day.”

“I think I’d like that,” you answer. Sliding into bed, Harry tucks the blankets around you. There’s only a soft lamp on, casting a warm glow to the room. They tell you that you can come to their room if you need them, or you can press a button that’s on the bedside table that sends an alert to their phones. You feel so content and safe knowing that they’ll always be there if you need them. 

Before they go, they each press a gentle kiss to the top of your head, wishing you a good night and sweet dreams. It doesn’t take long for you to fall into a peaceful sleep, so content, and for the first time ever, so hopeful for your future.

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AN: Thank you for reading! Like I said, chapter 3 should be out tomorrow! I literally woke up this morning and decided to start it and now it's at 3.5K words and almost finished.

Next chapter here!