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whatwouldsylwrite · 1 year

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At least I got you in my head (3)

(2.5)

Summary: Abby is straight. And then you move in with her.

Tags: modern au, fem!reader, straight!abby (she is doing some comphet bullshit), pining, idiot in love and it's abby, reader is gay and tired.

Notes: gay yearning, homoerotic friendship, injuries, jokes about reader being weak but it's a comparison of average human/mma fighter. Abby is stupid, and they're both so delusional with "we're just friends" I feel like I need to write parallel povs with them so you'd see what the other actually felt.

Taglist: @abbyily @lillysbigwilly @gravygranules @blairfox04 @frogtits1 @ccinnamongrl (if you want me to tag you for the whole series dm me please)

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October rolled around and you felt like both of you finally got completely comfortable with each other. You spent a lot of time together when you both were at home and you made plans for weekends and free evenings, so your friendship was flourishing. Your stupid, unnecessary, nonsensical crush was flourishing too. You were pressing all your feelings down as best as you could, but when Abby laughed at your jokes your heart swelled with affection and even if you scolded yourself it didn’t work.

You needed a better way of getting over Abby. (some would say you needed to concentrate on Abby’s flaws - stubborn, leaves cups everywhere, has a hard time admitting she is wrong - but you’ve been down this road before, and it didn’t work, fuck you Jessica).

Sometimes you’d feel like you had a chance - when Abby hugged you tight or blushed when you flirted with her or when she affectionately called you a shrimp because you were hunching over in your chair while you were doing your homework. You’d have to snap yourself out of your delusions because you couldn’t afford getting your hopes up, and the constant reminders in your head actually worked. If you couldn’t get over Abby at least you could contain it at the level you weren’t hurting. You’d take that.

You turned your key in the lock and opened the door to your apartment just to be surprised when you saw the lights on: usually when you came home Abby wasn't there yet. You felt somewhere between worried and curious why Abby was home early.

You took your coat and shoes off and went to find Abby to check on her; you saw the light in the bathroom and the door was open, so you approached carefully in case she was naked.

"Abby?"

"Oh! Hi." Abby said and something clank on the sink.

"Can I come in?"

“Yeah.”

You walked into the doorway and gasped when you saw Abby’s face. You came closer immediately, looking at her face with worry. She had a bruise on her cheekbone, her lower lip was swollen with a small cut in the corner of her mouth.

“What the fuck, Abby?" You asked, for some reason trembling from worry. "What happened? Fuck, do you need to see a doctor?"

You held Abby by her neck, looking over her face, terrified and hurt from seeing Abby hurt. Who would do this? What kind of sick, violent asshole would attack Abby in the middle of the day? What did she even do to provoke such a response?

But Abby smiled, hissing from pain, and stroked your forearms.

"Hey." Abby said gently, soothing you. "Everything's fine. Wasn't paying attention during practice, caught some of the punches."

"Fuck, I forgot." You sighed, relieved. Abby was fighting for fucking fun, of course. "I thought someone attacked you."

Abby laughed and kissed your forehead to soothe you, her lips soft on your skin. You felt your chest flutter, but the relief you felt was bigger - Abby was okay, she was safe and these injuries didn't come from someone's violence.

"Are you cleaning them?" You nodded at her bruises.

"Yeah."

"I'll help you." You said firmly and made Abby sit on the edge of the bath, looking up to you, amused. "Don't look at me like that, I can't cope with people being hurt."

"You're too sensitive for your own good." Abby said kindly.

"I care about you." You said quietly as you wiped the blood from the corner of her lip, and Abby stared at you. You heard her breath hitch - she was shocked. "What, you thought I didn't?"

"No-no. I know you care about me." Abby mumbled and looked somewhere over your shoulder, avoiding eye contact. You could understand that, being so close to someone would make some people feel awkward. "You're so gentle." She scoffed as if it offended her, because Abby was all about I can take it so don't go soft on me.

"Exactly why I said I'd do this. You, idiot, like to tough it up and suffer." You narrowed your eyes playfully and slapped your hand on the sink. "Not on my watch."

"How many vine compilations have you watched, grandma?"

"Takes one to know one." You scoffed and looked over her cut. You turned around and looked for disinfectant in the cabinet; then you took a piece of cotton and held it under Abby's chin so you could rinse the cut without applying any pressure. This disinfectant didn't hurt, so you were pretty calm about rinsing with it. "Okay. Do you have any healing ointments or whatever you use when you get hurt?"

"Yeah. Over there. It's for the bruise."

You nodded and gently applied the cream on Abby's cheekbone, your fingertips like feathers on her skin. Now Abby stared at you without hiding, looking at your face as if it was some kind of puzzle. She probably didn't even register that, so you didn't bring it up to her attention, not wanting to embarrass her.

"Okay. I'm done."

"Thanks." Abby said quietly and you smiled at her.

"Be careful next time. I thought you have gloves for a reason. How did you even get your lip cut?"

"I don't know, It just happened. The punch wasn't even that strong." Abby rolled her eyes and some part of you wanted to laugh because she was cute, but the other part reminded you that Abby was big and strong and actually fucking dangerous.

Yeah, she was cute when she scrunched her nose, but it was the way a lioness was cute. Little kitty from afar, but even the thought of it noticing you would make you hold your breath in fear. A lioness wasn't a kitty. A lioness was a killing machine that would overpower you and kill you in five minutes. This hit you in a way you wanted to press your thighs together - Abby was so much stronger than you just based on the fact she was a martial artist, and it made you feel things.

Things you needed to press the fuck down and make yourself forget them.

"Are you hungry?" Abby asked suddenly and you looked at her, surprised.

"Yes."

"I'll cook tonight."

You raised your brows, surprised.

"You know how?"

"Fuck you." Abby laughed and gently shoved you out of the bathroom and towards the kitchen. "Just because you're my housewife it doesn't mean I can't cook."

You sat on the chair and watched Abby cook with a mock worry, teasing her that she'd poison you, but Abby didn't mind. You actually knew Abby was a good cook, judging by how well organised her kitchen was when you moved in, but you couldn't miss a chance to tease her.

"Behave, (y/n). Or I won't feed you." Abby said sternly, but this little command caused a knee-jerk reaction, pressing your buttons in a delicious way. You took a small breath to calm down the sudden haze from her words and came back to reality. "Threatening works, huh?"

Threatening, yeah, of course. Threatening.

"I have a fight on Friday. Do you want to come?" Abby asked as she stirred the vegetables in the pan. "At five."

"Yeah, I do. I'm afraid I'll have a heart attack if I see you hurt, but anything to support you, babygirl." You winked and Abby laughed.

"There is going to be a party after the fight too."

"Cool."

You weren't sure if alcohol plus Abby's company was a good idea, especially since you'd get more sad that you wanted her, but couldn't have her. And drunk cuddles would definitely hit differently and in not a good way, because now you felt something. So right now - though you didn't admit it yet - you weren't planning on going to that party. That September outing was enough for you to understand you needed to protect your heart.

You snapped out of your thoughts when Abby stopped and rolled her arm, hissing. You frowned in worry, and when she looked at you, she explained.

"My shoulder."

"Did you get hit there too?" You raised your brows.

"No, just sore. I tried to massage it, but I couldn't reach it."

"I can massage it for you later, if you want." You said before you could even process the implications of your words. You said that on pure instinct "people say I'm good at massages and Abby needs help", but if she'd agree it'd mean you'd touch her.

Like. Naked back and everything. Shit.

"Oh, you're so fucking nice, (y/n)." Abby cooed and you huffed. "Thank you."

"Feed me first." You said just as sternly as Abby said before, and she chuckled.

"Or what, your weak little arms won't have any energy?"

"The fuck." You asked, dramatically offended. "My arms are strong. No, don't even look at me like that, Anderson, I'm not arm wrestling you."

"Because you're weak as a noodle?"

That was definitely the payback for saying she'd poison you with her cooking.

"You just want to feel that you're stronger than me, don't you?"

"Come on, it will be fun." Abby said, now very into the idea of arm wrestling you. She wiped her hands and sat opposite of you, her eyes twinkling with mischief.

"Yeah, for you." You rolled your eyes but put your elbow on the table. "Why do I even put up with your shit?"

"Because you love me, obviously." Abby rolled her eyes in return and your heart sank down in pain and came back in a matter of milliseconds.

"I'm just nice."

Abby wrapped her fingers around yours, delighted how your untrained hand was smaller than hers. Your hand was hot and dry, and your hold on her was strong - well, as strong as it could be for someone who occasionally went to gym. Your nails were short and neatly filed, you didn't wear nail polish. Abby suddenly remembered how Ellie explained to her why her nails were short with a shit-eating grin (for fucking, Abigail, for fucking) and even though it was funny then (yeah and nail polish is too gay, right?), it wasn't funny now, with you.

Why the fuck she was so bothered you had a sex life? She wasn't in any position to police your life and especially your private life. She really needed to be a better person.

"Ready?"

"If you break my hand you're paying for it."

"Ah, don't worry, my dad is a surgeon."

Abby counted down from three and let you show your strength first to not demotivate you, but even like this she showed you you had no chance against her, because while you flexed all possible muscles in your arm, she was almost relaxed.

"Yeah, you're a weak noodle." Abby said, smirking.

"You're a noodle." You puffed as you tried your best to move Abby's hand, but Abby didn't bulge. "Come on, give up a little."

Abby laughed, but let you move her hand halfway down, and you looked ridiculously happy, even though you knew you were cheating. Abby thought about letting you win because you looked so pleased, but she wanted to destroy you way more. So when you almost got her hand all the way down, panting and puffing, Abby flexed her muscles and slammed your hand to the other side. She was gentle and didn't hit your hand on the table, relaxing her grip just the second before pressing your hand down fully.

"Weak. Noodle." She said and you looked so angry she started laughing: it wasn't real anger, it was the playful one, and you honestly looked cute. "It's so fun to rile you up."

"First you humiliate me, then you poison me. I'm moving out." You said dramatically and Abby laughed again.

"Well then how are you going to get Ellie to date you, hm?"

"Oh my god, Abby." You rolled your eyes again. "Gimme my food so my weak noodles could get some energy to knead your back."

Abby was absolutely delighted with how grumpy you were. It was the same when you played Mortal Kombat - riling you up was the biggest joy she had (after cuddling with you). You were so chill all the time, calm and confident like nothing could throw you off balance, and Abby liked seeing you crumble with childish anger, because it filled her with childish joy.

You had your dinner and Abby rolled her eyes and called you a grandma when you mumbled something about poison again, but she saw how much you liked the food she made. Abby even started to reconsider if she actually hated cooking or she just needed to have someone to feed. Abby felt all warm when you said your thanks with a shy smile - something she never saw on your face before. Her stomach fluttered as she stared at you, searing your face into her heart. You were just adorable.

You washed the dishes and then asked Abby to lie down to fix her sore shoulder. You almost choked when she just took her shirt off and lied down on the bed, without any fucking warning. You felt your face heat up as you traced her muscles and her waist with your eyes, absorbing the sight in front of you. You could see how muscles moved under her skin as she adjusted her position on the bed, tucking her arms under the pillow, her shoulders showing these delicious curves around her biceps and triceps and whatever the fuck human arm was made of. The bruise on her cheek was getting purple and you felt your heart ache, sorry for someone as sweet as Abby to have this.

"I'm not a professional, so I don't think I can fix the problem, but at least you'll relax. Are you okay if I sit on top of you?"

"Of course. Your back would get tired way too fast if you stay at my side, so take a seat."

"So forward, Abby." You chuckled and swung your leg over her ass so you could sit. You tried not to think how your legs stretched over her soft butt, how it would feel if you were flipped over and she was pressing you int- Stupid horny monkey brain. “Do you have a lotion somewhere?”

“Will hand cream work?”

“Yeah.”

Abby reached out for her drawer and handed you the hand cream while you respectfully didn’t look at her tits while she moved up, her naked chest showing from her sides. You squeezed the hand cream on Abby’s back, laughing at her surprised twitch, and got to work. You massaged the top of her shoulders and her neck first, listening to her soft pleased hums as you worked the tension out of her muscles. Then you moved to her shoulder blades and pressed your knuckles just under the right shoulder blade where you knew the sore muscle was. Abby let out a moan as you dragged your knuckles over the muscle and you opened your eyes wide, surprised. Fuck, Abby sounded delicious.

“Fuck, right there.” Abby grunted and you repeated your movements, your ears tuned to her. Stupid, stupid horny monkey brain. “It feels so good.”

No. You refused to let her words get into your head. It wasn’t meant for you. It wasn't even sexual, what the fuck was wrong with you?

"That's what she said." You murmured and Abby chuckled.

"You have magic hands, fuck, do that again."

"You sure you're not my ex?" You teased. Abby didn't respond to that and you just continued massaging her back.

After half an hour of you kneading Abby's back she was a putty and your hands were tired. You sat down next to her on the bed and watched her blissed out face.

"Better?"

"I feel like I don't have bones anymore." Abby murmured into her pillow and you laughed quietly. "Thank you."

"You see where cooking dinner gets you." You poked her naked side, but Abby was too relaxed to twitch. "If you need my magic hands, just ask. I'm happy to help."

"You're too nice."

"Why are you saying it like it's a bad thing?"

"Just afraid someone would exploit you. Like, some idiot girl who won't appreciate you or something."

"Don't worry. I don't stay with people who don't care about me."

"I care about you, so stay with me."

Your heart skipped a beat as you stared at Abby: she always said this kind of shit that gave you hope. That maybe Abby was just in the closet. That maybe she felt something too. That maybe you just needed to make a move, be the brave one, and then you'd get to have her. Your intuition was constantly whispering to you that Abby wasn't straight, but you refused to listen, because a) it was wishful thinking and b) even if she wasn't, it was for her to figure out and no one deserved to be forced out of the closet.

"Well I don't want to be homeless, so I am staying with you." You stroked her back affectionately. "You need to shower."

Abby groaned and you laughed, before leaving her room. You needed to breathe.

Abby sighed quietly, still basking in your touch. She might've joked you were weak, but in reality your hands were strong. And so soft. God, you were so soft it opened some unknown need in her. She was longing for your touch in a way it scared her. Sure, Abby was affectionate and enjoyed hugs and cuddles and sleepovers when she got to hold someone - with boys they always held her, but with girls she could be the one holding and protecting. But with you she felt like an addict, craving your touch and closure with actual fucking pain in her chest, the constant pull to be closer in any way possible. Abby never felt like that about anyone, and she didn't understand what it meant. Was she so touch-starved she was looking to get her needs filled by using the closest person she had? That was very selfish and Abby didn't like what kind of person she was becoming. She felt sick at the thought she was using you, the kindest person she knew, to escape her loneliness.

Abby sat up on the bed and looked at herself in the mirror, not really liking what she saw there. It felt like any issues she had inside were now outside, an inevitable evidence of her deteriorating morals. Fuck, she was turning into an idiot girl who couldn't appreciate you.

Abby touched her shoulder where your soft fingers were a few minutes ago. Why just your company and your jokes weren't enough? Why did she want more? She couldn't understand at all, she was missing something. (Yeah, probably her morals). But it scared her to such a degree she didn't even want to go there.

The knock on the door snapped her out of her thoughts. You didn't come inside, staying behind the door to give her privacy.

"Do you want to have some tea with me?"

"Yeah."

And everything was back to normal.

#abby anderson x reader #abby anderson x you #abby anderson #abby tlou #aligyimh

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roach-works · 1 year

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ace and aro opinions wanted

hi, im writing a romance novel with two idiots mutually pining for each other, and i want to avoid hurting and disappointing ace people by implying that the character who's a late bloomer is somehow proof that a sexually active relationship is the 'final' step of a 'true' romance, though the romance does move from best friends to sexual and romantic partners.

the issue is that a human is horny for his best friend, who's an alien, and fully accepts that his alien best friend doesn't and possibly can't feel the same way for him, since they experimented when they were younger and the alien didn't like it then. but now the alien is very much attempting to re-open the issue due to having hit his own species' age of maturity. the whole book is about him trying to communicate his new interest to his human pal, who is too anxious and insecure to get the message (and reexamine his assumptions) right away.

it feels stupid to have a whole book saying 'it's perfectly fine to be ace and you have to respect people's lack of interest in sex' when the conclusion is 'but neither of them are actually ace, hooray, now they're going to fuck nasty'. but i don't want to take out my support of ace identities... and also the whole story is a tense build-up to monsterfucking and removing the mutual horny pining from one or both of them leaves me with a completely different narrative.

anyway i would be interested in hearing from ace folks about what they hate and find disappointing in romantic media, and what kind of gestures and statements come across as genuinely affirmative rather than tokenistic. no one's obliged to help me out here or share more than they're comfortable with, but i would like some more perspectives than my own.

#writing

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s-e-v-e-n-24 · 27 days

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May you share your Arkana headcanons?

Ok so

They're both idiots when it comes to crushes. Idiots who would rather pine then Actually confess, and also, complete and utterly oblivious to any of the ways the other might try to flirt. Blame it on the regional differences and being bad at being social. So you end up with 2 people who, by all reasons, could just confess, but Won't. I like my ships stupid your honour/hj

When Montana is flustered, half the time it's completely internal, and the man just stares. There was a point before they became friends, that Arkansas thought he had it out for him

They gift eachother things! Like crows and magpies! Montana is the Treasure state, he's got a gem collection. Every so often Arkansas will open his door to find a pretty little gem sitting outside it. Arkansas is the diamond state. He gifts Montana little jewlery, like earrings. If they were to get married Arkansas is absolutely making their rings

They are "unconventional" beauty. Hooked and/Or crooked noses, moles, wrinkles, etc. Arkansas has starting to grey hair, to me. Montana's has random lighter brown/Gold strands

They are both Built. Not in a bodybuilder way, in the "Looks soft but is very strong" Way. Like bears? It's 3am forgive me the exact words fail me. Anyway, point being, they are both people that wouldn't expect to be picked up by a partner abd they can both very much pick their partner up

Montana is the 4th largest state. He's gotta be at least a head taller then Arkansas

Cowboy Montana. I don't think I have to explain. You get it. Man has a ranch still

Arkansas is more mechanically inclined, fixes their cars n such, and things around the house

Montana speaking both French and Spanish. Arkansas gets called "Mi tesoro" And "Mon cher" but most often, "Mon diamant"

They are the "My witch girlfriend" (Arkansas) "Me doing whatever the hell she wants" (Montana) Thing

In pre confession era they ramble so much about eachother. Texas and Wyoming are So Sick Of It. They're so lovesick. It's terrible. They're both so awkward about it too. Arkansas is tripping over his speech, Montana kinda just freezes like a deer in headlights. They have habits of gifting eachother things and immediately running away. Once they can be more normal, that mostly goes away. Except for one someone accidentally does something too romantic and now it's a whole Thing (50% chance the other person did Not notice)

They are both sort of quiet people. Don't prefer to do restaurant type dates

They patch eachother up <3 Look being immortal doesn't improve your fine moter skills and a tendency to be a dumbass. Sometimes you get burned while trying to fix something. Sometimes there are reasons you don't hike alone Montana

Hugeeeeee simps. Pre dating they are accidentally distracting eachother all the time

Montana getting Arkansas to teach him stuff (He is not paying attention on how to fix a car. Look he WAS. But now Arkansas is guiding his hands and his mind blanked. Lord help him

Montana loves the cold! Practically immune. Does own winter gear, but rarely uses it if he doesn't have to. Arkansas hates the cold. Living heater x living freezer

There probably is more, but my memory fails me

#asks #wttt montana #wttt arkansas #hi malllllll #arktana #welcome to the table #welcome to the statehouse #wttt #wttsh #the statehouse #the table #wttt shipping #wttt headcanons #i'm so insane about them

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7nessasaryevils · 2 months

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How are we already at episode 11???? This feels fake 🥺🥺

Sigh... alright then, let's do it.

- hi Cher!!! Who ya loo- Oyei!!!! Hi to you too! Oh we searching for Yak?

- me immediately worried that Yak has been triggered and is having a panic attack

Me when I realize yak is fucking sleeping on Dee's lap like the goddamn puppy he is doing everyone a heckin' scare!

- but also goddamnit they're so cute 🥹🥹🥹

- heheheh little kiss 💋

- FIST BUMPS!!! YOU DARE FIST BUMP IN FRONT OF MIETTE WHILE SHE PINES FOR PATPRAN?!? YOU DARE?!

- aww zazaki cheering so cutely in the background: my son!

- look at my little boxing family 🥹🥹🥹🥹 I'll burn anyone who dares hurt them

- I will not cry at how endeared and attentive Dee is when he listen to yak talking about how he preps for a fight I will not I won't!

- ahhh... the shoulder that started it all 😬

- more like Yoryak Phadetseuk's hubby 👀👀🤪

- I do love that Yei has learned and is now checking in with Yak instead of making decisions on his own... good job baby!!!

- babie yak has my whole heart 🥺🥹🥹 if this Mason guy is mean to my babie i will break him in half world championship title be damned! You haven't seen the strength of an angered mama bear bl fan!

- HES A BABIE A CHILD ILL RIP YOU APART ILL UNTWIST YOUR INNARDS AND TWIST THEM AGAIN LIKE A BALLOON ANIMAL ILL SHRED ALL YOUR CHARGING CABLES AND YOUR BOXING GLOVES ILL BURN YO- awww look Dee's feeding Yak!

- this little bitch fighting hurt people to keep his title im gonna sit on him!

- damnit yak BE SCARED!!! We all are!!!

- sir... push that straw all the way down what the fuck is that???

- Met Gala grim reaper is back for fucks sake 😬😑

- oh look! An actual representation of these two idiots 🤣 🤡

- ....okay... clown kink was not on my 2024 bingo card

- how the hell did they make clown nose touching cute???? Witchcraft!!!

- LOOK AT MY WHOLE FAMILY IN CLOWN NOSES THE BABIES!!!!!

- yak's about to say/do something embarrassingly adorable isn't he?

- he did!!!! The adorable clown you sweetheart!!!

- damn they're all so cu- FLOPPY COCK BASTARD DOCTOR SIGHTED!!!!! SEE WHAT YOU HAVE LOST YOU PISSPOOR EXCUSE FOR A HUMAN BEING!!!!

- ohh Taem... honey... don't look like that you're breaking my heart 😢😢

- no. No no no ono nonooooooo no please I'm begging anything that is good and holy please do not have Ter go up to Taem!!!! DO NOT DO NOT! SHE DESERVES BETTER!!

- side note: taem yelling at a vending machine is peak human behaviour I love it! ♥️♥️

- GODFUCKINGDAMNIT

- I'll light a million fires, burn a thousand sage, conduct hundreds of blood sacrifices and rituals if it means Taem never ever ever ever ever has to talk to you again you trash wearing pus oozing excuse of a doctor!

- nope I hate it P'Golf how could you??? Why is there always something that immensely disappoints me in every show???

- awww all the little kiddies giving Yak their encouragement ♥️🥹

- oyei and Cher with a kid.... @imogenegomi THE FIC IS COMING TRUE?!? Ohhhh ask him ask him ask him ask him 👀👀

- HE ASKED IT!!!!! 😭😭😭😭😭😭♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

- Cher Oyei as actual parents!!! Getting married!!! P'Golf!!! If this show doesn't end with rings and a kid, you and I are gonna have words!

- your feelings have not been fake for a long ass time Khun Yoryak

- back hugs my beloved!!

- you've had his love for a long time to- why am i surrounded by stupid gays???

- greedy little puppy 🐶

- FOREHEAD KISSES MY BELOVED!!!

- Kao!!!! Hello my most perfect of sons how are you??

- oh I completely forgot that contest was a thing 👀👀

- Kao.... do you have a date?? One that makes you smile like that?? Spill!!!!!

- WAIT WERE GETTING TO SEE HIM???? WHOOOO?!

- THAT GUY!!!! KLUEN FROM WE ARE!!!! HIIII!!!!

- angry English speaking Yak my most beloved sexy damn woah (I think I had a minor stroke)

- side note: love that they called Mason American and he very much does not sound American 🤣🤣

- no no no no yak honey no!!

- my heart breaks so much for Wandee because he must feel so helpless. He knows Yak is hurting emotionally and there's not much he can do for him short of Yoryak actually speaking to him about his trauma. All he can do is hold onto him and let me know that he's there.

- your parents are besties, I guarantee it!

- fuck. I'm calling it now: Dee is gonna have to operate on the day of Yak's match.

- zazaki worried for Yak is fucking adorable: the besties we deserve!!

- ...I still can't believe that there are people who get cancer from smoking and then still refuse to quit. I knew a deacon who did that... what did he die from? Lung cancer. 😑

- oh great... operating with the trash floppy cock who doesn't understand the word no... love that

- I HATE WHEN IM RIGHT

- don't make promises you're not gonna be able to keep because this is a BL show Wandee!

- you just said your levels were off the charts you little liar 🤣🤣

- CHER!!! Saying what we're all thinking!

- Oyei.... I see you sir 👀👀 show Cher just how long you can endure 😏😏😏

- okay now I'm crying... Yak giving Yei that garland is so perfect because it is acknowledging everything that Yei has had to struggle with. He was a kid who had to be thrown into the role of a father, a brother, a teacher, an owner and care taker not just for Yak but for the people in the gym. This is one of my favourite moments for these brothers 🥹

- BOXING FAMILY UNITE!!!!😭🥹🥹

- walking into an OR without scrubbing... has grey's anatomy taught ya'll nothing??

- Ter you're a shit doctor.

- DONT LIE TO YOUR THERAPIST YAK!!!

- oh Jesus fuck that's fucking creepy....

- Apichart asking the thing we're all thinking: WHAT THE FUXK ARE YOU DOING STANDING AROUND!!! MOVE!!

- ...ter doing one nice-ish thing does not excuse all the the shit he has done before and I'm upset with the show for even trying to give him some sort of redemption. When someone has put their all into you and you drop them like a hot potato, you get no right to try and insinuate yourself back into their life. You've lost that right.

- gotta appreciate a little sitcom comedy moment 🤣🤣

- TAEM!!!!!!!

- MY SON WANDEE KEEPS HIS PROMISES!!!

- on the lips on the lips on the lips come on!

- FUCK YEAHHHHH!!!!

And that's it for this episode. We had some delicious delightful moments and moments where I wanted to ram my fist through a wall (in anger not in "fuck they're so cute") but that tends to happen with every show I watch. I hope I never have to see Taem and Ter scenes again because I'll puke.

Next week shall be emotional... we are finally wrapping up Wandee Goodday. This show has been lovely and a definite favorite of mine for this year.

Ep 12 promises to make some of my dreams come true: I see Dee and Yak in white on a beach which tells me marriage scene??? Oyei and Cher wedding!!!

So until next week!!! Adios my darlings!

#wandee goodday #wandeeyoryak #wandee gooday the series #yak x wandee #wandee wittaya #yoryakwandee #yoryak phadetseuk #yoryakdee #oyeicher #oyei phadetseuk #boxing family feels #romance #thai #thai drama #thai series #thai bl #spoilers #wandee goodday spoilers

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steddieunderdogfics · 2 months

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Today is all about @spicysix! In today's Mod Spotlight, we're highlighting Lui and all they bring to this space!!

Lui handles our Challenge Monday and Theme Weekend Days! They queue up and handle any initial recs for those days, as well as keeping track of how many recs we need for each day!

lui (she/they) has discovered fandom life over 13 years ago and went through multiple fandoms since then. currently focusing on Stranger Things, they're an occasional writer and avid reader, and a multishipper at heart - but Steddie is her favorite ship to read in the ST fandom. she took a role as a mod on Steddie Underdog Fics trying to embrace a side of fandom that they haven't before, and it's been a great to be a part of it!

Having Lui on the team has been a blessing! Not only is she easy to work with and so kind, she's really helped level up this space in so many ways. I'm so glad I get to work with her! - ohstars

As a part of our mod spotlight, Lui answered some questions from you all and our team! You can read them below.

Be sure to stay tuned for more recs and future mod spotlights in the future!

What drew you to Steddie?

The opposites-yet-so-similar situation they have going on. Rich guy versus poor guy? Popular versus the loser? Jock versus nerd? But both with hearts of gold… Self sacrificing idiots…. Older brother figures… Smart in some ways but stupid in others… Stuck to high school ideas and dynamics… All of it is tasty.

What is your favorite thing about modding this page?

Getting to know many new fics! My TBR list has grown over what I can manage since I’ve started modding. My companions, Stars and Shane are also amazing and it’s great working with them.

What are your favorite tropes to read?

Probably strangers or friends to lovers. Or like, a one sided rivalry (usually comes from Eddie, who haaaates King Steve while Just-A-Guy-Steve never thought about Eddie before the UD shit lmao). I’m also a sucker for Soulmates AU; and anyone who knows me knows this: my favorite EVER is the timeloop. Ugh. My beloved.

What is your preferred way to read and find fics?

I usually read (or put on my TBR list) whatever shows up on my timeline. From friends, mutuals, or reblogs. When I go straight to the Ao3 ship tag it’s usually to find a specific type of story to read before I sleep,, so I usually set the filters to completed, under 10k words, and no Explicit and go through whatever shows up.

What’s your guilty pleasure trope?

I no longer feel this feeling, but I have once been found feeling guilty for reading monsterfuckeries of omegaverse stuff. Omegaverse is not exactly my cup of tea, but sometimes it can be fun. Anyway, embrace the cringe.

What makes a fic an instant yes for you to read?

Well, timeloops as I’ve said, mutual pining, a good ol’ roadtrip fun. And happy endings. Sorry, but sad endings are a no-go to me.

Anonymous - Is there any older or lesser-known Steddie event from the past few years that you particularly love (if ongoing or recurring) or loved? Did you participate in any?

Hmm no, not that I can think of! Our fandom is very creative so we have amazing events all year round, thankfully! I also haven’t participated in any Steddie specific events because, funny enough, Steddie is the ship that I write the least for (even though it’s the one I read the most! lol)

@sidekick-hero - What makes a fanfic stand out for you?

I think characterization and lots and lots of emotion. With big ships like Steddie, it’s easy for us to fall into different characterizations and sometimes we write them almost as OCs - and that’s not a problem at all, I’m in the team “write whatever you love”, I wouldn’t even call it “mischaracterization”. But when a fic is able to stay within the character’s traits, it tastes better lmao Especially if the side characters are well written – it’s often hard for people who focus on a specific ship to be able to write well the side characters or even care about them and in a fandom like ST specially I think the other relationships are just as important as the main romantic one. I also really love when a fic makes me cry until I have a headache.

@worldswcollide - What advice would you give to someone who is interested in becoming a mod in the future?

Only do it if you know you have the time to dedicate to it. It’s very upsetting to rely on someone only for them to never dedicate themselves fully to a commitment they made on their own choice. You also have to like what you’re doing. If you’re on a project like ours, you have to like this reccing interaction. If you’re on a bigbang project, you have to like being that leader and organizing dates and putting people in contact with each other. And it goes on, but you have to enjoy what you’re doing or you’re gonna resent it and other people involved will know. We always do.

Anonymous - Do you participate in any other fannish activities, like making playlists, gif edits, fanart, podcasts, Pinterest boards, etc?

Not anything that I share, no. I sometimes do moodboards or playlists specifically for my own fics, but besides that, writing and modding, I don’t do any other type of art (bc I lack talent and/or will to learn lol).

@sidekick-hero - What motivates you to mod for steddieunderdogfics?

The idea of shedding a spotlight on fics that can pass by unnoticed, I think. In a big ship like Steddie, that’s easy to happen because we’re two years past Eddie’s first appearance and we still get dozens of fics posted per day!! Being more in touch with the community in this way is fun!

@worldswcollide - Are there skills you’ve learned as a mod that have helped you in your everyday life?

I think every time you have to work in a group you learn something new, because it’s always new people and new ways to work with them. But I can’t think of anything specific, you know?

Anonymous - Have you had a particular favorite Challenge Monday or weekend theme so far (maybe because of the theme, the recs, or the engagement, or for some other reason)?

Well. Timeloops Theme Weekend for starters of course lmao. I also loved all the engagement and recs we’ve had for fics with podfics challenge, even though I don’t listen to podfics (or podcasts at all lmao) I was happy to see people showing our podfic people the due praise! Fics with colors in the title was also a challenge that we’ve had so many recs we’re still queueing them till this day basically lol. It’s always amazing when we receive a lot of recs and responses.

@sidekick-hero - What do you like best about fandom?

That’s a hard one. But I think the general sense of so many people of different ages and places in the world come together to show love to an art or artist. There’s something so simple and beautiful about that. Dedicating our free time to talk, praise, watch, listen, create fanart for something! It gives me the good chills.

@worldswcollide - If you absolutely HAD to choose—enemies to lovers or friends to lovers? (At least when it comes to Steddie)

Ohhhhmygod why would you do this to me!!!!!!! I’m gonna go with friends to lovers because that is also what I love the most in real life I think – the mutual pining, the obliviousness, the potential angst while they don’t confess, all the little moments they have together, the always presents “you are so dense and blind and stupid and dinguses” from Robin… Love that, yeah.

Anonymous - Has your experience as a fic rec mod changed your perception of fandom (positive or negative, though I do hope positively!), either as a whole or specifically for the Steddie fandom?

Oh, I definitely have a lot more respect for modders now lmao Not that I didn’t before, but it’s always different when you see it/do it yourself. It takes a lot of dedication and organization.

@sidekick-hero - What makes modding fun to you?

Honestly in this specific case, I absolutely love the routine process of formatting the recs lmao I genuinely have fun with it. But also, to see the interactions, how people talk about the fics they’re reccing on their asks, and also I love going through the tags on reblogs and seeing people praising the fics or seeing the author so happy with the recs. It all warms my heart.

@worldswcollide - What has surprised you the most since becoming a mod?

How this fandom is still so alive!!! It’s insane to think Eddie was first shown to us two years ago already and people are still in love with him and the idea of making him and Steve kiss. The creativeness of this fandom, the many fics we get with so many different tropes, AUs, all the different situations we keep putting those blorbos in. How, even within the same trope, different authors can always put their own little things onto their fics and even when they’re similar, no two fics are ever written the same way.

Anonymous - Do you find yourself engaging in reading and writing differently now (for any fandom) because of your work as a mod, or have you changed how you interact with others in fandom spaces?

I feel like I comment more, especially on fics that have less comments or interactions overall.

@sidekick-hero - What makes you fall in love with a fanfic?

I think I said in a previous answer, the characterization but also the way a fic is written. Like, if it’s through Eddie’s POV I love when authors use a kind of fast paced writing with no pauses and many thoughts happening at the same time while he has a hard time thinking about something specific or focusing on only one thing and and and– cause I feel like Eddie’s head is a mess like that. When it’s a fix-it, how the author manages to save everything, how they pass on the grieving and bad feelings of being part of an apocalypse. When they remember the characters are all just kids. When they give them a break. If it’s an AU, how they put our boys out of the apocalyptic situation, how they make Steve still be Steve when he’s just a baker or a teacher or a nurse and not a high school jock with a savior complex anymore. Those little big details.

Anonymous - Do you try to read through every rec or have you found yourself wanting to read more recs than you can keep up with?

Absolutely the second option lmao Also there are a few themes/tropes that are not my cup of tea, so they don’t go to my TBR list, but the list is still huge anyway lmao But I love learning about new works and writers even if I don’t have the time to read them!

Today, all of our recs are from @spicysix specifically! You can always see their recs on our Fic Fridays by checking our #mod lui rec tag.

#steddie #steddie fic recs #mod spotlight #mod lui rec #mod lui #steddieunderdogfics

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lavenoon · 2 years

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AU AU AU random tidbits

Some bastard Dawn, sweet Moon interactions, and general characterization thoughts. Also the realization that the reverse AU is just the pining AU

Y/N thinking they're the suave one with Moon and taking him out on a date to some climbing park, and it's the first time he slips up - and Y/N just ends up both in awe and flustered when he's suddenly just that tad more conversational, and smooth about it. Thought they could show off, and he just keeps up so easily, and then they get giddy - they don't get this with Dawn since they barely parkour nowadays for work, but here's someone who can just keep up with them and actually make it a challenge - they don't even realize how strange it is that Moon is that good, or suddenly acts out of character, because their cover slips, too (and Moon of course also doesn't realize - the familiarity of the situation combined with the familiarity of the person, and they overlap and cover any inconsistencies. Like they just go. I know this person. I know parkour. Means I know all of this, and it's normal! While they completely miss the fact that it isn't supposed to be normal)

re: Dawn calls Robin "little thief" - it's exacerbated by the fact that they may pickpocket a lot while undercover, being the one to sneakily grab wallets or phones or whatever for the info. Night shift/ canon Robin doesn't interact with people much, any time Dusk and them run into someone, it's basically unwanted trouble. But Day shift Robin has to really mingle, and steal right from under people's noses. They are good at it, but they don't quite enjoy the inflection with which Dawn says it. He definitely gets a little line about them stealing his metaphorical heart post-reveal.

Reverse Y/N doesn't wear the mask usually during missions - that's just a tad too obvious for undercover work

Sun and Moon don't realize in this case because there's even more of a mental distance between the guarded but hotheaded rival and the open and earnest neighbor - and still no memory comparisons. Again much luck, but it wouldn't be interesting if they weren't idiots this time around

Prompted by @lulu-lullabies: Robin calls Dawn "Sunshine", with SO much passive aggression in there, but the sweetest smile. It's their favorite nickname, ESPECIALLY when faking a relationship for a cover because he really cant do anything then

Rando, delighted: "Oh, like the song! You are my Sunshine! How sweet"

Robin, choking on blood: "Yeah that exactly"

Undercover Dawn also lays on thick in response. Sweetheart darling my love (if he's feeling particularly daring) and enjoys the bittersweetness of Robin looking like they bit a lemon and trying to cover it. He's a bastard he gets to pine and think its unrequited

Whenever they do end up blushing however, it gives him hope - which is part of the reason why he does aim to fluster them so much <3

Sad thought of rival Dawn learning quickly that he has to mask his concern somehow and trick Robin into self care because they're unreasonably suspicious of anything genuine from his side

Not AU AU AU specific, these boys are still caretakers at the core. They have their jobs and are good at that, but with Y/N they just. They care, so they have the urge to take care. In all iterations - we've seen it in canon Moon, fretting after they got hurt, same as reverse Dawn - the gift baskets are genuine, and they each throw in a little taunt as a cover because they can't have their little rival catch on.

Sun and reverse Moon have it easier (though Moon makes it harder on himself), because they're the friendly neighbor, and neighbors care about each other, right? That's - that's normal. They're all stupid and Y/N doesn't know it's out of the norm because they're just as weird about it (after all, they're the landlord desperately trying to befriend their tenant). So as neighbors Sun and Moon get to talk, and reassure, and care (and provide) in all the ways that are out of reach for their respective reversed versions, and Y/N, used to living alone and being socially isolated due to their job, doesn't realize that's not quite how it usually works. It works for them <3

Now forget everything I just wrote for a bit to enjoy the next bit of Dawn being a scary bastard:

Hilarious as outsider but probably somewhat terrifying for Robin in the moment (and also SO telling on myself here): pretty early in the rivalry, after a solo mission that required parkour, they encounter Dawn, and think "hey, I have a height advantage for once" and just. Think they're so funny for taunting him from like a couple yards above him. Not too far - they don't need to yell, don't make a scene. Dawn isn't amused at all. But he just grins, and squints in that way that should (and in the future will) tell Robin that they fucked up, and just takes a pair of gloves out of his pocket. They kind of snort about that, get halfway into another jab, but then oh no what is he doing

Because loafers and suit be damned, he doesn't have to climb very high, and Robin is just so startled they barely start to scramble away before he grabs them by the ankle and pulls them back, closer to the edge. Neither of them is dangling anywhere of course, but whatever ledge they're on offers enough space for him to just loom over them as they're flat on their back, looking like a deer in the headlights, with his legs just tightly flanking them, not quite pinning but close enough, and both hands on either side of their head. The most wicked grin as he switches to the sharp teeth, and while Robin really doesn't dare look away from his face, they can hear the soft scraping of his fingers on the concrete

"Well, would you look at that - I've caught a little thief. Anything to say for yourself?"

Robin kind of chuckles, but they're shaken up and it carries in their tone

"I thought you'd recite my Miranda rights."

He just leans closer, and they click their mouth shut with a click. It's still bright out, but he's big enough and close enough to keep them in his shadow

"If we were law enforcement, sweetheart, perhaps I would have. Don't think you have the high ground - I'll catch you, wherever you are."

And just like that, like nothing happened, he leans back again, gets up, steps away, and jumps back down to the ground.

Robin isn't quite so daring yet - crawls kinda closer to the edge to look at him, but definitely stays out of reach for now. He catches them staring, and smiles up at them, teeth back to normal and for everyone just looking on completely polite

"Next time you try something like this, you'll be the one to pay for the dry cleaning. Looking forward to tomorrow's mission."

And then he forever regrets it because from then on Robin is (un)reasonably wary of him. Fucked around and found out, both of them

st. stargazing date with reverse Moon.

Driving out of the city to see some actual stars, sharing a blanket even tho he doesn't need it, because it's comfortable and neither mention it, anyway - Y/N excitedly taking his hand and pointing with the other as they recognize the big dipper or something, and he softly starts telling them about the night sky, about which constellations are visible when, and how it's supposed to look, and maybe, in a moment when they're distracted, he tacks on the mutter that he'd like to take them some day, see the real stars

Everyone say thank you Lulu (again) for making this better: They get the classic "accidentally gets close enough (theoretically) for a kiss" but Moon's a shy idiot and Y/N is an oblivious idiot and.

He's in nightvision mode, and Y/N pauses for a moment, then cups his face - just a little awkward, maybe, but they make do and just absolutely destroy him by saying "Your eyes are kind of the color of an aurora borealis. Wanna go compare one day?"

They just laugh softly and let go after a moment, and he has no idea if they meant it, but stars how he hopes (and dreads) that they did

#post let luce #fnaf sb #fnaf sb au #accidentally undercover #AU AU AU #need to post this now bc otherwise I'll just forever add to it #and I need it for context for my ramble #back from work and immediately unhinged hi whats up <3 #that one Dawn scenario. don't psychoanalyze that even if it's really easy. please. /j /lh #ANYWAYS YEA this au and variations continues being catered to me #which makes sense given that. it's mine.#hope u enjoy it too lmao

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hellcheerficdatabase · 1 year

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Frogs All The Way Down

Author: @chaosisaconcept

Rating/Warning: Mature

Chapter Count: 1/1

Description:

"She can’t take her eyes off him when he in Dungeon Master mode. He’s an excitable guy normally, but he comes alive in a whole new way in this setting. His motions are fluid and dramatic, and his eyes sparkle with a mischievous light she usually associated with their more private activities. It starts a fire low in her belly, a creeping warmth that makes her miss Eddie asking her a question. She looks around in confusion when she realizes every eye in the room is on her"

Chrissy's first campaign with the Hellfire Club is a chance to get to know Eddie's world, and she's determined to make him proud. Eddie in DM mode, though, does things to her she never expected.

Tags: Alternate universe- no vecna, fluff, mutual pining, idiots in love, Chrissy is a sweetie, they're stupid for each other, Chrissy POV, one-shot, status: completed

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beanghostprincess · 11 months

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headcanon that actually sanji's eyes are each of a different color (like, blue and soft brown kind of very yellowish. heterochromia is beautiful like that) and after the time skip, when he changes his hairstyle, nobody actually notices because after 2 years of not seeing each other of course they wouldn't remember his eye color. and he actually prefers it this way because he can't deal with them laughing about it now.

but then, one night, when usopp and him are on night guard together for the first time in ages (they're both pining idiots and lost the chance to confess when sabaody happened) usopp won't stop staring at him, focused on his eye, specifically. sanji takes a drag of his cigarette and he feels himself getting more nervous by the second. "is the smoke bothering you or-"

"no!" usopp replies a bit too fast, blushing and instantly bringing his hand to the back of his neck, looking around to avoid sanji's face for a while. "i was just thinking..." he takes a deep breath, and goes back to looking at sanji. the cook won't stop thinking about how long the sniper's hair is and the way it gently falls over his shoulders as he speaks. he doesn't even notice usopp's lovesick stare when he speaks. "your eyes. i liked the blue one. reminds me of the sea."

sanji's heartbeat stops for a second there, and he almost chokes on the smoke but covers it with a dry laugh. "so this one isn't pretty enough for your liking, then?" he tries to sound sarcastic and prays for usopp not to notice the way his voice falters with fear.

usopp's eyes are wide open. "of course it is! it's- it's pretty. really... pretty." the sniper feels his body shaking as he tries to fix what he said. they're both acting stupid, blushing and trying not to seem too focused on the other. but it's not like neither of them can hold back from staring at each other. silence comes, and somehow usopp has the courage to smile. "it's just like sand. or gold."

"that's the best metaphor you can come up with, longnose?" he says this as if he wasn't on the verge of tears.

the sniper shrugs his shoulders. "why would you cover one? together they'd be, you know, like the beach. sand, gold, the sea... it's- um- cool."

sanji raises his eyebrow at that, and scoffs as he takes another drag of his cigarette. he doesn't want to finish it that early, or he won't have anything to do with his hands later. "i wouldn't hear the end of it if i did."

"but they're beautiful!" usopp insists. they've been sitting closer and closer.

beautiful.

something inside of sanji breaks after hearing that word, looking up at the night sky for a moment with a bittersweet smile. "well, men aren't supposed to be be-"

"why not?" that catches him off guard. usopp's decisive eyes meet his. the sniper's hand is shaking, but he still makes an effort to touch sanji's hair ever so slightly, thinking twice about it. their faces are so close sanji refuses to smoke in case he burns usopp. "can i?"

sanji looks around for a few seconds, and thinks about refusing. about denying him the chance to see his face completely. to witness what he truly looks like. but he nods, anyway. "you tell somebody about this and i murder you. they haven't noticed yet."

usopp hums at that, a tiny, excited smile showing up on his lips. "because they don't pay attention to you. only an idiot wouldn't be able to notice."

"maybe you pay too much attention to me." and it kind of sounds like 'i don't deserve that you do'.

but usopp finally moves his hair to the side, and the way his breathing twitches says 'you deserve everything. you're everything' and the sniper kind of hopes he hears it. usopp takes a deep breath, letting his other hand travel to sanji's face so he can hold it better. the cook grabs him by the wrist but keeps it there.

they're both shaking.

sanji lets out an embarrassed laugh, something that usopp has never heard coming from him. "not that cool when you see both at the same time, huh? the eyebrows are also-"

"you're gorgeous."

before any of them can panic at usopp's sudden comment, sanji's grip on his wrist tightens. usopp notices, looking down at his lips for a second, going back at his eyes again.

they keep looking at each other for a while, realizing that usopp is kind of almost on top of sanji at this point, and that neither of them wants the other to move away. they just want- need each other closer.

sanji is so overwhelmed by his words he isn't sure of what to say, so he just slides his hand to grab usopp's tightly. beautiful. gorgeous. it's breaking him. it's too much. and yet, he wants more.

"can you- say it again?"

"you're beautiful." he breathes out. "gorgeous. the prettiest person i've ever-"

"oh, shut up!" sanji can't help but laugh at the exaggeration, but usopp is completely serious.

oh, fuck, he's being completely serious. because the sniper is now too close to him, and he isn't smiling anymore. "can i draw you someday?"

and perhaps it's the butt of the cigarette burning his fingertips, but he feels brave enough to lean into usopp. "can you kiss me first?" and it comes out instinctively.

the way the sniper jumps a bit, surprised at his words is endearing enough for the cook to smile right away. "what? yes? yes. of course. yes. yea-"

it's sanji who kisses him.

and he thinks, while all the ashes fall completely on the deck, that he'll keep covering one of his eyes. not because he doesn't think they're beautiful enough to be seen. not because he's ashamed.

he just doesn't want usopp to get used to them. he wants him to draw him and kiss him and hold him like this forever, every time he sees both of his eyes and eyebrows, like the first time. forever. and besides, the sniper is right. the others didn't even notice. perhaps they will after a few more days of being together, but for now?

maybe sanji really, really likes the fact that usopp is the only one that pays this much attention to him.

#no this isn't at all like that pudding and sanji scene shut up #i just had a revelation #i just love sanji being insecure and usopp just loving every part of him #get yourself an artist boyfriend today that compares your eyes to the beach and wants to draw you so bad he starts shaking idk #could've made it a fic but i was lazy and this is only a short thingy #anyway i love them very much they're so cute #daily sanuso post for clear skin and luck #sanuso #sanji x usopp #black leg sanji #usopp #one piece

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aayo-whatt · 1 year

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Fandom? Merlin Pairing? (pre relationship)Merthur Summary? Modern!AU Merlin and Arthur go to a party. Lots of (one-sided) pining and angst. Warnings? angst, mentions of alcohol, allusions to drugs/being unknowingly drugged Word Count? 1k Notes? i'm sorry ok?? my music was too vibey, and got me in my feels it was very much my fault- thanks @archangelsammy for choosing the fandom + characters :)))

The party is too loud. But he wants to be there.

Oh fuck, no he doesn't. He's only there for Arthur. Arthur, his best friend, who was straight, completely straight - who's never even questioned whether or not he liked males. Who is, quite literally, the straightest a man could get.

And yet...

Fuck, it's loud in here.

God. The only reason Merlin even considered coming here was for Arthur, and he's not even with Merlin! He's off doing cool bro-things, with his macho bro-friends.

No wonder he'd never even looked at Merlin like anything other than a little brother. But Merlin wanted to be more, he wanted so much fucking more from Arthur.

Why the actual fuck is it so loud here?

The music is barely even music. At this point it's just a fucking drumbeat. Pounding, pounding, pounding against the inside of Merlin's skull, trying to get out, but it can't. And Merlin can't escape either.

And the people 'dancing' don't help either. Don't all they know to leave the grinding and gyrating to the bedroom? God. They're acting like they're coated in aphrodisiacs. it doesn't even matter who they're with, as long as it's pleasurable.

Shit, he was going to throw up. How weak was his stomach? He'd only had a glass of water! Of course Arthur merely put up with Merlin, the weak idiot he was.

The quiet seems too quiet. He can still hear the beat through the thin thin walls of the house, but it's too quiet.

He'd somehow managed to get out of the house, pushing and shoving his way through the walls of flesh, that the party-goers turned into.

He still felt like he needed to throw up, even though he'd just emptied his guts on to the front lawn of the stupid frat house. A puddle of vomit, he very nearly landed in, thanks to his piss shit coordination.

But hey, at least the grass is cool underneath his face. The stars barely noticeable, despite the hour, thanks to the masses of street lamps that covered the college campus.

"Merlin?"

Oh gods, he was going to throw up again. But he couldn't, not when that voice was getting closer with every fucking millisecond.

He's pulled up by the back of his shirt into an upright position. His head spins, as the face of a stupidly handsome man swims into his vision.

Shit. Maybe he did drink something else.

"Wow! I didn't think you'd be so... reckless."

"I'm not." He said, or at least he tried to say - it just comes out a garbled mess.

Arthur chuckles, dragging Merlin to his feet, "Let's go, buddy."

Buddy. Fuck, that's all he was ever going to be wasn't it?

Arthur had had to carry him up the stairs. He was trying not to laugh the entire time. But Merlin, could feel the barely contained vibrations through his chest.

Merlin hated every second of it. Merlin loved every second of it. It was the most embarrassing moment of his life. It was the closest he'd ever physically been with Arthur. He would never forget it. He would never forget it.

What made it worse was that he couldn't even hold his head up to make sure it didn't fall in the fucking toilet bowl when he started throwing up again. Arthur had to.

He wasn't laughing this time.

That made it worse.

He woke up with the worst fucking headache anyone could imagine. His entire body felt like it was on fire. Every time he breathed his eyes burned. He could barely swallow. His mouth was too dry.

Eyes shut as tight as possible, he heaves the too-heavy blanket off of him, and shifts so his feet are off the bed and he's sitting up. A fire even worse than the original soared up his spine, and without thinking, Merlin launched into a sprint towards the bathroom again.

There was nothing left inside him to throw up. He was just gagging up spit.

He left the bathroom, heading to the kitchen. He hadn't left the pain meds in the bathroom for some reason, so he needed to find them.

Someone clearing their throat draws his attention away from his search for medication. He turns to find Arthur watching him from his position on the couch.

"Are you feeling better?"

Merlin nods.

"Say something then."

Merlin tenses. Arthur, noticing his hesitation, sighs and walks up to him.

"I need to talk to the guys about the water." There's a moment of silence, where Merlin resists the urge to touch Arthur in any way possible. "Speaking of water, would you like some?"

He nods again, not sure if him not being able to speak is because of his dehydration, or the man in front of him.

Arthur places a glass in front of Merlin, and he downs it in one go. Arthur chuckles under his breath, and Merlin almost smiles at the thought that he made Arthur laugh.

After a few seconds of comfortable silence, and Merlin guzzling down another glass of water, Merlin apologises.

Arthur looks up immediately, "Why?"

"What..?"

"Why are you sorry? You've nothing to be sorry for."

"I know how much you wanted to go to the party, and you left because you had to look after me. Because I was too stupid to know to not trust a random glass of water that someone gives me. I'm sorry that you got dragged away from your friends just because of me."

When Arthur doesn't respond Merlin glances up to find Arthur staring at him. "What's with that look?"

"It's jus-" Arthur's phone rings, and he checks the caller ID. He glances back at Merlin apologetically, "Sorry, I've gotta go."

Merlin blinks. Plasters on the same smile he always does.

"It's fine, don't worry about it."

Arthur hesitates for a moment.

"Go. I'll see you later."

Arthur nods, "Thanks Merlin."

Fuck. He was stupid. So so stupid. Especially to think that Arthur would've wanted to stay and talk to him.

For fucks sake. He's fucking straight, and he loves it. Why'd he have to fall for the straightest person in the whole fucking world?

At least it was dark enough in his bedroom, that no one would have to be able to see him. Even if Arthur was gay, why would he want to be with someone like Merlin? Why would anyone want to be with him?

He was so fucked up. Outside and inside. No one would ever want him, least of all the person he wanted more than anything. He would just be alone forever. Nothing he isn't used to.

But god, he wanted so much just to be with someone.

With him..

#bbc merlin #merlin bbc #merlin #bbc arthur #arthur pendragon #arthur #merthur #merlin x arthur #merlin x arthur pendragon #merthur angst #bbc merlin angst #merlin angst

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lgbtlunaverse · 2 years

Text

"Side girl in an mlm fanfiction (90% chance of having been the main love interest if the source material was het) who is super smart and the only one with her shit together so she helps her dumb gay friends realize their feelings" is a fine trope considering it was effectively a replacement for "that stupid bitch I kill in my story for getting in the way of my ship" but it gets attached to ever single female character regardless of whether it actually fits them or not and I think we should let girls be stupid again.

"Girl is the only one smart enough to notice her gay friends' pining so she makes a plan to get them to confess-" NO. Girl notices pining but is too fucking stupid to see the U in UST and becomes fully (and LOUDLY) convinced her friends have been dating behind her back and gets increasingly angry when they, and everyone else with enough braincells to realize the gay social minefield they're in, tells her otherwise. Makes increasingly ridiculous plans to get them to "uncover the truth" and COMPLETELY BY ACCIDENT gets the other 2 idiots to admit their feelings. When they tell her this she STILL believes it's a prank and will continue to do so for the next 25 years.

#fandom #fanfic #NO ONE GETS TO HAVE BRAINCELLS IN THIS HOUSE #this is not a serious attempt at fixing misogyny in fandom i just want my dumb girl content

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notquiteaghost · 3 years

Text

the thing abt bruce wayne is he will go out his way to torture himself for the sake of others cuz he has, yknow, deep n profound trauma. and the thing abt clark kent is he knows that about bruce, obviously, as anyone who has managed to wriggle past bruce's defenses does, but there is knowing it and Knowing It

so. bruce is in love with clark. he realised this after clark & lois got together, because he is an emotionally repressed idiot (dick: hey what are you & clark doing for valentine's i need ideas / bruce: wh. why would we be doing anything / dick: you're dating??? cmon B i have eyes / bruce: no we aren't / dick, with great disbelief: uh huh. sure), and because he is a compulsively self-sacrificing emotionally repressed idiot he decides he is going to just pine away forever because clark is dating lois and they're good together. insert typical 'lowest self worth known to man' bullshit. bruce will be clark's friend and that will be enough!!!!

except. dick asks clark if he and bruce are dating, again in the 'i know this to be true i am giving you the opportunity to admit it to me so i can stop pretending like weekly dinner isn't date night' sense, and clark goes oh. oh damn we are huh. lois did you know i'm dating bruce??? to which lois says yes, obviously, christ you have the weirdest blind spots

and clark is like. well we don't kiss or have sex or??? ...bruce is ace isn't he. cool okay. i am a good boyfriend who respects my repressed idiot's boundaries so i won't make him talk about this i will just follow his lead.

We Continue Like This For Years.

eventually they do get a clue. probably when jon is five or so & clark is asking bruce for his opinions on schools n it finally twigs as weird, the amount of consideration clark is giving to bruce's thoughts, & bruce is like. it IS ultimately yours and lois' decision. and clark frowns n says "i know you're not his biological parent but obviously you still have a say". bruce stares at him for a very long moment experiencing a sinking kind of deja vu then says "why", and clark frowns harder, because they? talked about this?? bruce agreed to be involved in raising jon??? just like clark is involved in raising bruce's kids??? bruce you are aware we are co-parenting???

and bruce, his whole world tilting to the left and suddenly looking completely different, says "do you think we're dating". clark says "do you not?" and bruce says "sometimes i can be incredibly stupid. how long have we been dating". clark says "wait have you never kissed me because you thought we were just friends–" and bruce kisses him

#yelling at clouds #dc #superbat #batfam #superfam #and wherever he is dick suddenly feels incredibly smug #dealer's choice on whether bruce is actually ace or not #either way he IS weird n squirrelly about intimacy. clark IS right abt that

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teklarn · 3 years

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hi, this is my first ever ask so I'm not sure I'm doing this correctly, if that's the case I'm sorry; I don't know how tumblr works just yet >:')

would it be possible for you to write something about bakugo, pining incredibly hard for fem!reader and initially hating how strongly he feels about her? because they're not even friends, they only exchange few words occasionally and she doesn't even glance at his way whereas he slowly finds himself unable to divert his eyes from her during classes? shes always with damn deku and his friends and doesn't even seem interested in him at all but his heart can't ignore the way she looks at him proudly whenever they spar together, the way she sends him small confident smiles as they fight each other with all they have; so he thinks that maybe, maybe he might have a chance. basically bakugo liking reader so much he's completely lost in self-hatred because he always thought feelings were for weak romantics and not great people like him, but everytime he sees reader doing some badass things (again, like sparring with him and basically matching his skills etc...) he's reminded of how badly he likes reader? but when he finally accepts he's fallen for reader, after ignoring and trying to forget about how she makes him feel, he masters up the courage to confess? and it's a very clumsy confession because he's awkward and has no idea how to deal with those feelings? and he tries so hard to make reader realise he's never been more serious than now? and reader is startled and speechless before rejecting him? and at that point he's just completely humiliated, so he nods and walks away.

it might be a little dramatic but I've always been into unrequited love and one-sided pining. thank you, its okay if you don't want to write about this, i'll understand <33

𝓫𝓻𝓾𝓽𝓪𝓵 - 𝓴. 𝓫𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

character(s): katsuki bakugou x fem!reader (my hero academia)

reblogs are greatly appreciated!

a/n: AHHHHH this is so cute <33 honestly this is super exciting for me and this ask made me so happy, lovey. i’m fairly new to tumblr, i’m usually just a reader but i wanted to migrate here from wattpad so this made me so happy. here u are my love <33 i hope this lives up to what u wanted !! :)) a bit lengthy, but i had a lot of fun writing it !!!

summary: bakugou finds he’s rejecting his feelings for you in fear of becoming weak, however he just can’t seem to ignore you.

genre: fluffy, fluffier than the clouds istg, however the clouds are sprinking a little teeny weeny droplet of angst.

warnings: cursing (bakugou, duhh), one-sided pining (on bakugou’s part) second hand embarrassment (on bakugou’s part bc we can all agree he’s a complete idiot when it comes to trying to get someone’s attention), just bakugou being a jackass, i gave the reader a quirk

word count: 3,859

(pls excuse any typos or mistakes, i edited to the best of my ability but i miss some things sometimes !)

- - -

part 2 is here my loves <3

brutal. it was utterly ruthless. he couldn’t focus, couldn’t think right. his hands were already exceptionally sweaty, but gosh when he saw your damn face, he was ready to explode. literally.

what the hell was it about you? was it your stupid smile? or the way you just seemed to carry every battle on your back? was it all the undeniably sweet things you do for others ‘just because’?

it made him angry that he thought about you, but gosh he couldn’t wait to see you every day.

just like any other day, bakugou found himself staring at the large door to the classroom, awaiting the moment you would bounce into his day, skirt shifting around your legs, bag slung loosely around your shoulders.

his leg was bouncing eagerly.

bakugou didn’t know when the feelings came. his cheeks just started flaring up all of a sudden and one day you just looked...different. you hadn’t done anything different to yourself. it was just him. not that he would ever admit that, to you or anybody else.

you were insufferable. you were stupid and obnoxious and so...so damn...

“y/n! come look at this!”

you’d come walking into class just as expected, and as soon as you did, that stupid nerd had called you over.

it didn’t help that deku sat right behind him, either. the two of you had recently gotten closer. bakugou noticed it last month when he yelled at the two of you to shut up about all might and get to work. he’d turned around to find you leaning over deku, hands resting on his shoulders while you peered at his phone.

“sorry, bakugou,” you’d said, barely acknowledging him. you had waved him off like an annoying fly. is that all you were to him? some nuisance that got in the way of your oh-so-entertaining conversations with deku?

all he heard nearly every day was your chipper voice talking to deku. always, “oh my gosh, midoriya, did you see the fight edgeshot was in last night?” or “midoriya! i have something to add to our quirk analysis book!”

that was the one that took the cake. you two dorks shared a notebook, occasionally passed between one another, and filled it with junk about quirks and pro heroes. but no matter how much he tried to tune you out, no matter how he tried to zone off and think about something else, you were always there. it made him want to vomit how much he thought about you.

you were doing an adorable shuffle over to midoriya’s desk and leaned over the table as you usually did while he angled his phone your way. “did you see this hero report?”

deku let you slip the phone out of his grasp to get a better look.

“no,” you breathed. “was this just recent?”

“yeah,” deku said, taking the phone back. “last night.”

“holy—”

“can you guys shut up over there?” bakugou said, his voice quaking.

“sorry, kacchan.” deku scrolled through the article.

dammit, bakugou thought. “i wasn’t talking to you, nerd. i was talking to shitface over here.” he jerked his head towards you. his eyes flared in anger when he saw you were looking down at your phone, now focused in on the article yourself. “i was talking to you, asshat!”

your eyes flicked up to his. you looked around for a moment before slowly pointing to yourself as if to say, “me?”

his face scrunched. “yeah, you. you’re so damn loud.” gosh, he hated how his voice was cracking, how he could feel his ears and cheeks lighting up in a swollen, cherry red. his stomach flipped.

she’s looking at you, gosh i’m sweating. i’m going to throw up. she’s so gorgeous. what the hell? they’re ugly as shit, i don’t think anything of them.

his eyes bore into yours.

“did you...need something?”

your voice broke his trance.

“kacchan, are you okay? you dozed off there for a second. you look like you’re burning up.”

bakugou looked to deku who was currently stretching out of his seat, arm extended. he pressed the back of his hand to bakugou’s forehead. “you’re really warm, kacchan. should we call recovery girl?”

it took him a moment to realize what was happening. his vision got blurry every time he was with you. bakugou smacked deku’s hand away. “i’m fine!” his voice lifted at the end, cracking. “i’m not sick. don’t you think i’d take better care of myself?”

“i don’t doubt you take good care of yourself, kacchan, but everyone gets sick once in a while. there’s nothing wrong with that.”

“i never get sick!” besides, if i got sick, i wouldn’t want you to be the one taking care of me.

he was still pissed. he was always in a bad mood, however, more so right now because you’d gone straight back to your phone and that stupid hero article that was supposedly so damn interesting.

soon enough, the bell rang, and you were seated at your desk. it was jirou’s old spot, however, after much convincing, you two had switched spots so you could be closer to deku. just a few months of getting close to the idiot and you two are suddenly best friends. jirou hadn’t minded one tiny bit, claiming she needed a break from how loud that section of the room was.

late as always, aizawa came trudging into your room. thankfully, his entire body wasn’t obscured by a yellow sleeping bag that smelled of something unwashed and coffee and gasoline. (for some reason, aizawa’s clothes always smelled of it.)

“lucky for you,” he began while shuffling papers on his desk, “all of you are doing training for these first periods.”

the class cheered in perfect unison, followed by their individual chatter. you had erupted with glee along with them, and bakugou was sure he felt his heart clench and then explode. just a tiny bit. but he shoved the feeling down just as quickly as it had come up.

“go out to the field and wait for further instructions. don’t make a sound in the halls otherwise, i’ll expel all of you.”

this shut everyone up in almost a second, the sound draining out just as water does. the first years trailed out into the hall, single-file mimicking the positions baby ducklings would take when following their mother.

bakugou found himself walking faster when he saw you take up your spot in the line, hoping to land his spot right behind you.

unfortunately, this idiot who considered himself bakugou’s friend tugged him back. “bakugou!” a familiar voice rasped.

“shitty hair, let go of me.”

“hey man, chill out. wanna partner up if we’re doing training in pairs?”

bakugou glanced at the line, the spot that should have been reserved for him now taken up by sato.

bakugou tugged his sleeve from kirishima’s hand. “whatever,” he snapped.

“sounds good!” kirishima flashed him a toothy grin and a thumbs-up. the bubbly feeling in bakugou’s chest died down as he stood behind sato, the overwhelming scent of sugar filling his nose, various candies that would go straight to your arteries.

“you smell like ass, damn,” bakugou remarked, squeezing his nostrils together.

luckily, sato was tall enough to not hear the insult, as he towered over bakugou by just another head. the line began moving like a sloppy train down to the change rooms.

bakugou scoffed as he listened to your giggle. he should be making you laugh.

“you’ll be given partners randomly from this box.” aizawa held up a familiar red box. “inside are all your names. i’ll select one, then that person will come up and pick another name from the box. that will be your assigned partner for today. as soon as you have your assigned partner, i want you guys to get straight to work.”

denki raised a hand, speaking before being called on. “sensei, why are we getting random partners? we’re always allowed to choose.”

“in the real world, you’re going to come across different villains every day. you’ll never improve your skills or your quirks if you keep fighting the same person.”

denki sighed, slumping back.

dammit, bakugou thought, gritting his teeth together. there wasn’t any way he wanted to be partners with you. it’s obvious he’d win the fight in the first few seconds.

yes! exactly right! bakugou internally grinned. his fluctuating feelings had finally soothed themselves. you were just another extra, and he had no room for you in his head.

aizawa took a moment to fiddle with the slips of paper inside the box. soon enough, he pulled out a name. “todoroki.”

todoroki walked up, digging his hand into the box when aizawa held it out for him. he pulled out a name, delicately unraveling the slip. “uraraka, you’re my partner.” he deadpanned.

the brunette grinned. “great!”

the two found their own spot on the field, and the class’s attention was once again diverted to their grouchy teacher as he pulled out another name.

“bakugou.”

bakugou strutted up without a worry in his mind. he pulled a name to find...

“y/n,” he said, voice a low growl. instead of the annoying fluttering in his chest, his eyes met yours, and they were filled with a different, new ferocity. he crumpled the paper in one hand, letting it twirl to the ground.

you looked at him, unsmiling. your eyes gave away nothing, and to bakugou’s knowledge, all you saw in him was another opponent.

it took him a moment to realize you had both locked eyes for about a minute. perhaps the two of you would have stayed as you were if aizawa hadn’t snapped at the two of you to get moving as yaomomo’s name was called.

bakugou was on his way to the back of the field, you followed close behind. while there was plenty of room still, he chose a secluded area. while it was still open enough to view everything going on so nobody got hurt, it was often nobody chose to train here. for whatever reason, you weren’t sure.

“wait up, bakugou,” you said. after a bit, you caught up to him.

“if you can’t keep up, then...” then what? he looked at you from the side of his eye. “then don’t keep up...” gosh, here came the embarrassing, disgusting feeling of redness in his cheeks.

you laughed. “what?”

“shut up.”

“you’re an idiot, bakugou.”

“i said shut the hell up!”

“what, so you can call me shitface in front of the entire class but you get all pissed when i call you an idiot?”

so you had heard him!

he tongued his cheek, curling his hands around an invisible ball, explosions sparking in the centers of his palms. “don’t expect me to hold back, dumbass.”

“i wouldn’t dream of it.”

gosh he loved that about you.

bakugou caught his thought in the air.

ahem...gosh he hated that about you.

you both charged in at the same time. his cry was louder than yours, but you struck first.

he admired your quirk. while he’d overhead you explaining all the drawbacks it had, it was strong, and you were strong because you knew how to control it.

purple arrows flew from your arms, going in your desired directions. if you lost focus for one moment, they’d vanish and weaken. if you focused too hard or long, you’d be plagued by a splitting headache.

he’d spent too much time obsessing over your strengths and weaknesses.

your arrows were weightless, however they were solid objects capable of carrying any mass, any thing, and worked as extensions of your body.

the violet arrow had shot out at him, twisting around his right gauntlet and crushing inwards. it’d snaked around him without him noticing, slithering along his back.

bakugou struggled to get the air-light arrow off his wrist, but it was no use. he glared back, only to see your focused, furrowed brows. he’d expected to see your cocky ass smiling. it was nice to see you weren’t.

that was one thing that had also caught his eye. you never underestimate your opponent, but you never underestimate yourself, either.

you conjured a larger arrow. it snaked around your right arm as you hurled bakugou into the air, releasing your grasp on him. you shot your other arrow into the air, and it raced into the sky.

it swerved. bakugou’s eyes went wide as the tip of the arrow came down on his chest. if they weren’t intangible things, he would have been bleeding out.

another drawback: the arrows, while they could solidify, they couldn’t do any actual damage. you had to use your surroundings to inflict harm on your opponent.

he coughed out as the arrow shot him into the ground. he hadn’t even touched you, and here he was, vulnerable and so...so...

you stood over him, hands on your hips.

vulnerable and so lost in that adorable, winning smile.

“get away from me, idiot,” he grunted and turned onto his side, his back crying out in pain.

“i think i won this fight, bakugou,” you chirped, rocking on your heels.

“don’t get arrogant, shithead. you won’t be winning against me anymore.”

you grinned, arrows shooting out behind your back.

the dorms were exceptionally quiet. you were typing away in the common room, bakugou on the couch reading. everyone was off doing something else. it was the weekend, luckily. he’d expected you to go bounding out with everyone else, however you’d stayed back, claiming you had some homework to catch up on.

bakugou being classic bakugou had stayed back. he was excited to have the dorm to himself, but your dumbass was stuck here with him. couldn’t you have done your typing in your room?

you were so aggressive on that poor keyboard.

“oi, quiet down with your shit typing.”

you barely grunted in response.

“don’t ignore me.”

“i heard you, mom.”

“the hell did you call me?”

no response. only your aggressive typing is a bit less aggressive.

“i can still hear it,” bakugou remarked, eyes fixed on your back.

“‘kay,” you said. your typing slowed a tad, and your pressure on the keys lessened.

it was quiet now. bakugou should go back to his book. he shouldn’t still be looking for a reason to talk to you.

the pages crinkled in his fingers. he bit his tongue, keeping his snarky comments in.

“you’re a fucking idiot, you know that? doing your damn homework. it’s due tomorrow.”

you turned, pursing your lips. “and how would you know what i’m working on? are you stalking me?”

“i- what? no. you’re such an idiot, of course i’m not—”

“i’m messing with you,” you breathed, face un-moving.

“o-oh,” bakugou stuttered out. he blinked awkwardly.

“gosh, what’s gotten your panties in a twist?”

“you’re annoying.”

“you’re a jackass.” you returned to your work. bakugou settled with reading in his room. reading consisted of jumping onto his bed just as the stereotypical high school girl would in an eighties movie. he buried his face in his pillow, face burning bright red. he cursed you for making him feel this way, and hated himself even more for how much he enjoyed it.

the next day came swiftly. you’d left early to go train with midoriya. there were many improvements needed to be made, but you weren’t doing too bad.

you propelled yourself forwards with an arrow, and your green-haired friend shot back, lightning flickering around his body.

landing back on the ground, you panted and swiped the sweat from your brow. from the corner of your eye, you could make out both kirishima and bakugou coming to the training grounds.

bakugou stopped in his tracks, frowning at the sight of you.

it was evident he hated you a bit more than everyone else. he was always making his annoying comments, he was always snubbing you. you saw no reason to talk to him, so you didn’t. either way, even if you tried, he would still get angry for no reason.

it’d taken you quite some time to get used to his obnoxious attitude. tuning him out had been the best course of action, in your opinion.

the way you and midoriya had bonded was through bakugou, in a way. the first day of school, bakugou had snapped at you for tripping over your laces and nearly crashing into him. later that day, midoriya had stepped up and apologized for his old friend’s actions.

you two had never been too close until now. the recent incidents going on with the league of villains had snagged your attention, and it seemed you were the only person who didn’t mind listening to him ramble on about heroes.

you were just as passionate and just as dorky, but midoriya could talk your ear off. you never minded, and he always took the hint when you didn’t want to listen.

you brought your leg up, twirling in the air with ease and watched your heel collide with midoriya’s face. he grunted, stumbling back.

you were about to charge in again when a hand landed on your shoulder, big and rough. you turned to see bakugou standing behind you, a scowl on his face.

“fight me again,” he demanded.

“excuse me?”

“don’t act like you didn’t hear me.”

“i’m in the middle of fighting midoriya right now.”

“so?”

“so if you think that i’m just going to ditch my friend because you want to fight, i won’t.”

“you’re being stubborn.”

“i’m being reasonable. back off.”

“y/n?” midoriya rubbed his jaw—right where you had struck him. “what’s going on?” he jogged up to you and bakugou.

“he wants to fight me in the middle of our fight. it’s nothing serious. don’t worry about it, midoriya. let’s just ignore him.”

bakugou made a sound someone would only make if they were choking. “the hell did you just say?”

“we’re ignoring you!” you waved him off and placed your hand on midoriya’s shoulder, wandering away.

it was new to him, not getting what he wanted. and what he wanted right now was to be around you. again, it wasn’t like he would ever admit that to himself.

“dude? you good? i thought you went off to fight y/n. i was so ready to cheer you on, dude,” kirishima’s chipper voice piped in. “she’s not fighting with you? why not?”

“the dumbass was just probably scared of getting her ass beat by me.”

“dude...that sounds really weird.”

“whatever, shitty hair. let’s go.”

the clock ticked. his ears were on fire. again.

gosh, it was happening again. it was all you. his face scrunched up, his voice would surely crack if someone were to ask him what was wrong.

bakugou was once again stuffing his face in his pillow, hiding his expression from no one. why did you have to go train with that shitty nerd? why were you always around deku? deku, of all people. what did he have? why was he so great?

bakugou was a man of many insecurities, but losing to deku? that was possibly his biggest fear.

perhaps he wasn’t the nicest, or the most soft person out there. bakugou could admit that, at least. but he was smarter than deku. he was stronger and he was better and people liked him more. right?

what was so...amazing about deku?

it was often bakugou would find himself obsessing over little, insignificant things such as these.

you were what he was thinking of most of the time. just yesterday, he’d gotten a test returned. he was expecting an eighty at the lowest, but more so expecting a high ninety. it’d come back exactly sixty percent.

sixty. percent.

bakugou vividly remembered staring at your face. he also remembered not being able to focus because of it. his grades were dropping because of you.

you were the only person to be able to do this to him.

his heart grew quiet, but the pounding of his didn’t cease. he lifted his head.

“alright, fine,” he said aloud. “you win, y/n. you win.”

he settled with getting over his feelings the way he’d read them in his collection of romance manga.

bakugou left his room and knocked on your door. (he was banging on it, but it was his nice way of knocking.)

you answered, looking around awkwardly. “yes?”

his hands shook. how was this supposed to go? sure, he’d seen it in romance movies and read it in books but it was always easy to tell whether the guy would get the girl or not.

in this instance, bakugou was clueless. for once in his life, he was clueless. you stood, tapping your foot with a hand on your hip, waiting expectantly for him to tell you why he was here.

“um.” he scratched behind his neck. “you uh- i uh...i’m sorry i called you a, um...a shitface.”

“okay? is that it?”

what? come on! it was already unlike him to apologize. what else did you want from him?

“did you...i’ve been thinking, maybe? maybe we could..train together as...friends?”

“...what?”

gosh dammit, as friends?

“whatever, um...the uh...” oh gosh, what did the boys do in all the books he’d read? right! bakugou stretched out his arm, resting his forearm on the door, leaning to the side.

although he didn’t, really, because like the clumsy jackass he was, bakugou missed completely and nearly toppled to the floor.

this earned a snicker from you.

his stomach flipped and churned, and bakugou found himself unable to reach your eyes. “uh, would you maybe..? okay, um. do you want to go on a date with me? you absolute fucking dumbass.”

your eyes flew wide. “...what?”

“no, that’s not what i— i mean i didn’t mean the last part. um, i meant the first part. the first two parts. the part where i was asking you if you wanted to go on a date with me and then before that when i said maybe because it’s still a maybe until you say yes. or...or no because that’s an option too.”

he swallowed.

you resisted the urge to mock him, just a little bit. “um, bakugou, listen.”

he leaned closer. “yes?”

“it’s going to be a no. i’m sorry, but i’m just not interested in you like that.”

it took him a moment to register everything. his shoulders sagged. gosh that was brutal.

“oh, alright.”

“yeah, uh, sorry about that.” you offered him a weak smile, still a bit shocked yourself. he did his best to return it, and when you closed the door, his face was ready to explode.

it was so damn difficult to deal with these feelings, but maybe it was better this way. knowing where you stood on your end, he knew he wouldn’t miss out on anything.

perhaps it was alright to admire from afar. things could happen in the future, right?

right now, he’d just wait. for a long, long time. bakugou pressed a hand to his chest, feeling his erratic heartbeat. maybe it was alright to not have you right now. perhaps he could better himself for you. just for you.

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