#ugh I'm tired and full of emotion right now

[multicolour-ink]

The Bros running and leaping to the Power Star together 😭❤💚

That is all I ever wanted was for them to have a significant moment where they work together and I'm so happy it happened!!! 💗

- - -

On a side note: what do you think it was like for the bros to experience the Power Star together?

Like, there was ONE star between the two of them.

So did the power get shared between them? Did this mean the brother's minds and souls were connected for a brief moment?

Do you think they talked about it afterwards?

They're always been in sync right from the start, but this time it was on a whole other level. And they agree that it felt incredible to be joined as one being in that moment.

[writingforstraykids]

I owe you a kiss - Pt.2

Pairing: Minchan x femReader

Word Count: 3133

Summary: Minho and you work out a few methods to help Chan acknowledge his feelings, good or bad. Both you and Minho have nothing but Chan's best in mind, slowly realizing how insecure Chan truly is...

Warnings/Tags: fluff, angst, domestic life, husband!channie, husband!minho, anxious!numbish!channie, soft!minho, emotional hurt/comfort, soft fluffy shit

A/N: Dedicated to my girls @kai-lee08 @atinyniki and @sona1800 since you related to the first part so much💕

PART ONE | PART THREE

The next morning, Minho wakes up to you, planting kisses all over his face. You poke his side, giggling as he makes a cute protesting noise. "Wake up, sleepy," you tease him. "Channie and I made breakfast." 

"I'm tired," he whines softly, feeling the jetlag hitting him full force. 

"Minnie, it's 2 pm, come on," you say, and he shoots up in shock. 

"What?!" he asks with wide eyes, head turning as he hears Chan chuckling. He's leaning in the doorframe, arms crossed in front of his chest, and watches him amused. 

"She's right, if you don't get up now, you won't be able to sleep tonight," he tells him, and Minho falls back into the pillows, groaning, and closes his eyes.

"Come on, Channie made pancakes," you say, and Minho squints at you. "With chocolate chips." 

"Fuck you," he presses out before pushing himself up, ignoring your succeeding giggles. 

He joins you only shortly after, wearing one of Chan's signature black sweaters and his glasses. His hair looks fluffy, and you can't fight the urge to run your fingers through it. Minho melts into your touch with a soft hum. "Chan's right, you're such a kitten." 

Minho's ears burn up as Chan smirks and hands him his plate. "Stop it already." 

"Okay, this is the first step of our getting better program," you announce, and Minho glances at you, amused, taking the first bite. “Cherish every bite. Take the flavor all in and focus on how it feels against your tongue. Focus on the temperature and texture," you say.

Minho chokes on his pancake as he can't hold himself back from laughing at your serious face. Tears shoot to his eyes as he coughs, covering his mouth with his hand. Chan drops his fork and quickly steps next to him, patting his back forcefully. Minho winces at the impact and waves him off, still laughing. "Y/N!" he whines as he's finally able to breathe again. 

"What?" you ask, confused. "I was doing some research, and they said it's a way to focus on what you're feeling again." 

"Why would you-" Minho breaks into a fit of giggles again, burying his face in his arm. "Why would you say it all serious like some instructions on how to-." 

"Lee Minho!" you protest loudly, knowing where this is heading. 

Realization hits Chan's face, and he has trouble holding back a laugh. "Min, you can't be serious, why-" he fails and laughs as well. 

"I swear I hate you two," you groan softly as they giggle but can't fight back a smile at that sound. Your boys being happy is all you want, after all. 

"I'm sorry, honey," Minho snorts and shakes his head at himself before continuing to eat. "But she's right, try it out, Chan." 

Chan exchanges an amused look with him before taking another bite and chewing more slowly now. Minho cracks up once again, seeing Chan's partly focused but also disgusted expression. Chan almost spits it all over the table, meeting his eyes, quickly covering his mouth. 

"Nice texture, love?" Minho asks, and Chan makes a protesting sound, smacking his arm gently. 

"Fucking hell, forget that. This isn't working with you two massive toddlers," you laugh and roll your eyes at them. "Minnie, do you have anything planned for today?" 

"No," he shakes his head. 

"Great, I'm taking the two of you to the beach," you nod. 

"On second thought, there's something I really have to -." 

"Min," you say firmly. "I know you can't swim, but you have us." 

"Ugh, fine," he groans, giving in as he sees a hint of excitement in Chan's eyes. Sometimes, he forgets how much his husband loves the sea. 

-

Just as you're about to leave, Minho gets a call from the company. He joins you again with an apologizing smile. "I'm so sorry, but they want to do the interview that would've been scheduled for today online now." 

"Aw no," you pout softly. 

"I'm sorry," he pouts right back at you, cupping your face and kissing your nose. You giggle softly, and he smirks succeedingly. "I'll join you later, okay?" 

"Okay," you sigh softly. 

Minho turns to Chan and flashes him a gentle smile. "You two have fun, alright?" 

"Alright," he nods and gently caresses his cheek. "Drive carefully, okay?" 

"Promise," he smiles softly. 

You watch him leave before turning to Chan and glancing up at him. "You're still in the mood to go to the beach?" 

"I'm not in the mood for anything right now, but that probably won't change for a while," he giggles and meets your eyes. "I'm all yours today; we can do whatever you want." 

You smirk and gently grab his hand, smiling as he lets you. "We should get going; we can go for a swim now as well, with Minnie coming later." 

-

Chan helps you spread the towels on the sand, chuckling as your hair keeps on landing in your face due to the soft breeze. You smirk at him and put down your bag at the edge of the towels to keep them in place. Once you have everything in place, you take off your dress and throw it onto the towels, smiling at Chan. “Come on, angel.”

Chan chuckles at your eagerness and takes off his shirt, throwing it onto your dress before taking your hand and letting you pull him down to the water. You chicken out for a moment as the cold water hits your feet but Chan is having none of it and lifts you up, making you squeak in surprise. He walks you into the water, gently lowering you down with him.

You smile softly as he lets you stay close and wrap your arms around his shoulders more casually. Your eyes travel up his face, starting at those plump lips you love kissing so much up his nose before meeting his soft chocolate orbs. You lift your hand and very gently caress his cheek, thumb brushing his cheekbone. Chan’s eyes search yours, almost looking a little puzzled, but deep down, you can tell he relaxes at the feeling. “Hey there, beautiful,” you smile happily. 

“Stop it,” he mutters softly, blushing a little at your fond gaze.

“This is nice, isn’t it?” you ask, and he hums lowly, not knowing what to say. “We haven’t had much time outside the house together lately.”

“True,” he nods and mirrors your smile as you brush back his damp curls. “Haven’t had much time in general lately.”

“Neither did Min,” you nod and lean back a little to look up at the perfectly blue sky.

“And still you stay,” Chan's voice pulls you from your thoughts.

You frown softly at him. “Of course, I stay.

“Nah, that’s not, of course,” he laughs and shakes his head at you. “You stay with us without complaining once when we don’t have the time we should have for you. We’re away so often, and when we’re home, we’re tired.”

“Which means we’ll stay in the whole day, and I can cuddle you guys. Chan, I chose this when I said yes. I know both you and Min would handle it differently if you could, so don’t blame yourself,” you assure him and gently nudge your nose against his. “I love you so much and all the time we can’t spend together makes our joined times even more special. Just like this here right now,” you smile brightly. 

Chan doesn’t know how to respond, but he can tell you’re being sincere. He buries his face in your shoulder and hugs you tight for a moment, humming softly as you run your hand through his hair. “I’m so glad we have you.”

“I’m so glad I have you guys too,” you smile and kiss his head, playing with his hair at the back of his neck. “Let’s get out so we’re all dry before Min gets here,” you suggest, and Chan gives in with a low hum. You pull him back to your towels and sit down with him, not letting go of his hand yet. “Close your eyes, pretty.”

“What?” he asks confused.

“Close your eyes, come on,” you laugh, and Chan rolls them before doing as you said. “Okay, and now?” he asks impatiently.

“Now, take a deep breath and try to relax. Listen to the waves and feel the sun against your skin,” you tell him, voice growing soothing and quiet. Chan does as you say, lying back with you. You gently fondle his hand in yours and turn to watch him. 

“Quit staring, creep,” he mutters under his breath.

“We’re married, dumbass. What exactly haven’t I seen before, huh?” you give right back.

“Exactly my point, no need to stare,” he grins and squints his eyes at you, turning to face you. 

“What do you feel?” you smile at him, and Chan thinks for a moment. 

“Feels warm,” he shrugs, and he huffs at the gently scolding look you give him. “The waves remind me of home,” he goes on. “The sun feels nice…your hand also.”

“See, that’s a lot of positive feelings, right?” you ask, and he nods hesitantly. “Min and I both did some research and found some stuff that might help you feel better…or feel in the first place.”

Chan turns onto his side, facing you now, and smiles softly. “That’s very sweet.”

“Anything for you, Channie angel,” you beam adoringly and sink deep into his eyes.

Chan tenderly cups your cheek and searches your eyes, leaning in a little. You can feel his wedding rings resting against your cheek, smiling at the feeling. “I don’t tell you how beautiful you are often enough,” he whispers, making a slight blush travel up your neck to your cheeks. “Can I…Can I kiss you?”

You blink a little stunned, before nodding quickly. “Always.”

Chan's lips melt against yours, feeling as soft and familiar as ever, sending sparks through your body. His hand finds the back of your neck, fingers threading into your hair, and a soft, weak sound escapes him. Your body searches his, your lips chase his, and you can’t stop yourself from gripping his hair a little tighter. It has been almost a week since he kissed you and you hadn’t noticed how much you had missed it. Chan pulls back after a bit, a beautiful smile covering his lips. “That felt amazing,” he smirks, making you blush.

“Sure hope so,” you tease him lightheartedly and wink at him. 

-

Two days later Minho walks upstairs to get Chan for dinner, a little surprised as he doesn’t react to you calling out for him. He knocks at the door to his home office and lets himself in, closing the door again. Chan sits at his desk, staring into the distance, and the only thing telling him he isn’t completely zoned out is him humming to the tune playing from his laptop. “Channie love?” he asks gently, and Chan snaps out of it, blinking at him confused. “Everything okay?”

Chan is tempted to say yes, but when he meets Minho’s concerned coffee orbs, he gives in, shaking his head. “Not really.”

“How can I help?” he asks, stopping a few steps away from him, unsure if physical comfort is what Chan needs now.

“I don’t know,” he admits and pulls down the sleeves of his sweater.

Minho notices, knowing it’s a habit of his husband when he’s feeling cuddly. He decides to take a different approach and grabs Chan’s spare chair pulling it next to him and sitting down. Offering his hand, he leans back and watches Chan take it, hesitantly intertwining their fingers. “What’s wrong, love?”

“I can’t get anything done,” he huffs, clearly frustrated. “I promised Y/nnie to help her pack before she goes to see her family tomorrow. I also promised Hannie to send over the new track and…,” he trails off, and Minho notices the tears burning in his eyes. “I’m a failure, Min.”

“Oh, baby,” he breathes out and shakes his head. “Come here?” he offers, gently patting his thighs.

Chan glances at him timidly and chews on his lower lip. “I’ll be too heavy.”

“Fucks sake,” he chuckles and cups his face. “I fucked you stupid in less comfortable positions, so move your ass here now for some cuddles.” Chan chokes on his laugh, and a tear spills down his cheek. He gives in and straddles Minho’s lap, burying his face in his shoulder in an instant. Minho soothingly rubs his back and kisses his hair. “You, my hardworking love, are not a failure. You simply need a break from now and then, like the rest of us do. I already helped Y/nnie pack, and Hannie can wait another day, there’s no rush. All the tracks for this comeback are done.”

“Min? Channie? Are you guys coming or-?” you ask, opening the door and frowning at the sight in front of you. “Oh, Channie, what’s wrong?”

“I feel like I can’t keep up,” he sniffles, buried in Minho’s shoulder.

“Keep up with what?” you ask patiently and step closer, exchanging a worried glance with Minho, who seems calm. Sometimes, you really admire him for keeping a cool head when things get rough.

“Everything,” he admits.

You place your hands on his shoulders before soothingly rubbing his arms. “Sometimes, Channie angel, you need a break…and you very clearly need one at the moment. That’s completely fine, and the things you feel are valid. But I can assure you, you’re doing such a good job.”

“We’re very proud of you, Channie love,” Minho agrees, glad that you instinctively chose similar words to himself. 

You lovingly run your hand through his hair and massage his scalp, trying to soothe him. Minho rubs his back and leans his head against his, glancing up at you. “Minnie and I thought we’d have dinner now before you guys drop me off at the airport tomorrow morning. We won’t have that much time for breakfast. You want to join us?” you ask, feeling like giving him a choice is the better option now.

“Okay,” Chan sniffles softly and pulls back from Minho, messily wiping his cheeks. He chuckles weakly as Minho cups his face and kisses his forehead soothingly. 

-

Shifting in his seat, Minho turns up the radio after a while to cancel the silence as neither he nor you are sure whether you should talk. Chan is driving, saying something about it easing his mind, and seems deep in thought as he does. Minho and you decided to come along, joining him for an aimless late-night drive. Minho starts humming along to the tune playing and glances up at the dark sky, wondering how the next few days will be with you gone. He smiles to himself as he notices you singing along quietly in the backseat and chimes in gently at first. 

“Oh, Min, that’s our song!” you say excitedly, and Minho giggles as he recognizes the new tune: Connected. “I still think it’s so cute you did that, Channie angel.”

Chan chuckles softly and rolls his eyes at you before giving in and starting to sing with you. Minho watches the two of you, amused, singing the parts he remembers. The next song has the three of you singing at the top of your lungs, fooling around as you do so. The smile on Chan’s lips seems genuine and it warms your heart seeing it. After a while, Chan decides it’s time for a break, and you all get out. You smile as you hear the waves crashing against the shore and take a deep breath. Chan’s hands slip into yours and Minho’s as he walks down to the beach with you. 

You all sit down in the sand and Minho chuckles as Chan lies down in the sand. “Channie love, you’ll be covered in sand later. It’ll be all in your curls,” he scolds him lovingly. 

“Then you can help me wash it out,” he shrugs and smiles up at him. “If you lie down as well, I might help you too.”

“Nope, I have a better idea,” Minho giggles and rests his head on his chest. 

“Smart,” you nod and do the same on Chan’s left. 

“You two are ridiculous,” Chan sighs before laughing softly. 

Minho gently rubs his chest and turns a little to look up at the sky. “It’s nice here,” he says after marveling at the stars painting the sky above you.

“It’s beautiful,” you agree quietly. 

A comfortable silence accentuated by the waves and calm breeze lulls you in. You’re ready to fall asleep right there in the sand when Chan speaks up. “I love you two so much…I hope you know that.”

“Of course we do,” Minho whispers and moves a little on him, planting a kiss on his jaw. 

“We love you too, angel,” you smile and softly pat his chest.

Chan gently pats your arms, signaling you to sit up. He stares at the sea for a moment, feeling his mind calm. “I think I need a break. Like a literal break,” he says then, and Minho watches him thoughtfully.

“You mean from the group?” he asks gently, and you can see he’s nervous at the thought of managing without him for a while.

Chan hums softly and plays with the sand between his legs. “I was thinking and…I really miss Australia,” he says, and the silence grows heavy for a moment. “I don’t wanna say home because that’s here with you two, but-”

“It’s okay,” you assure him gently. “It’s your family; of course that’s home too.”

“I just need to get away for a while, sort my head. I know you're doing everything you can,, and you two make me happier than anything else, but-"

"Go home," Minho cuts him off gently, and Chan glances at him timidly. His soft brown eyes are filled with warmth and understanding. “You deserve a break. We'll be fine; I'll take care of Y/nnie." 

"And I'll take care of Min," you laugh and exchange a fond look with him. "Seriously, Channie, we'll be okay. We can call or come visit, and you can come back whenever you want to." 

Chan looks at you and Minho, stunned. He didn't expect your approval as easily as that. "You're sure?" he asks. 

Minho scoots a little closer and searches his eyes before kissing his lips softly. "Very sure, Channie," he says gently. "Don't worry so much about us." 

Chan smiles gently and takes both of your hands. "Thank you." 

“Just…don’t forget about us over there, yeah?” you ask, not fully able to swallow down your own insecurities and fears.

“Never,” Chan says firmly and flashes you a gentle smile. “I could never forget you two.”

MASTERLISTS | PROMPT LIST | GUIDELINES

Taglist: (Please let me know if you want to be added to/removed from the taglist!)

@mal-lunar-28 @aaasia111 @galaxycatdrawz @kthstrawberryshortcake @channieaddict @soullostinspaceandtime @malfoygalaxies @rebecca-johnson-28

[unhinged-waterlilly]

My thoughts on the wisdom saga songs, which I'm gonna now listen to for the next few months(I stayed up till 7 AM for the livestream man)

Spoilers ig

Legendary: Telemachus, my beloved. My pookie. The light of my life. Everything I hold dear. I love you so so much. Also the fucking suitors I'm just gonna-

Little Wolf: full-on video game. Holy hell. Athena sweeping in and helping him out. Just ahhhhh. And then like "oop pushed you too hard."

We'll be fine: Athena saddddddddd. And then Tele being the Ray of sunshine and optimism. Ugh I love love him.

Love in Paradise: CALYSPO WHEN I CATCH YOU CALYSPO. I HAVE NEVER HATED A WOMAN MORE BURN IN TARTARUS I DONT CARE YOURE A GODDESS ILL FUCKING KILL YOU.

ODY MY BABY. SOMEONE GET THAT MAN HIS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT HUMAN(penelope) NOW. FUCKING FUCK THE CLIFF SCENE. HE JUST LOOKED SO TIRED AND SCARED AND SAD AND AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

God Games: Love love love. All the other gods JAYS DAD BEING HEPHAUSTUS HELLO????? AWESOME. AND LITERALLY ALL THE GODS MY fav were probably Aphrodite and Ares just UGGHHHHHH. FUCKING ZEUS- BEAST MODE ZEUS FOR HIS PRIDE??? REALLY?????? YOU ASKED HER TO PLAY YOUR GAME AND GET MAD WHEN SHE DOES. ZEUS THEY COULD NEVER MAKE ME LIKE YOUUUUU

ALSO THE FLASHBACK???? AFTER TELE WAS JUST BORN????? ATHENA HOLDING HIM??????????? AND THEN HER JUST FUCKING WHAT DYING?????????? MR. JALEPENO GET BACK HERE RIGHT NOW THERES NO WAY IN TARTARUS YOU JUST DID THAT

That is all. Thank you for coming to my whatever the fuck this was talk. I loved this sm. I guessed that Lengendary would be my fav out of this saga, and i was right. So yayy

[strawberrymilk-sunshine]

Will you test this for me?

A bit of a silly goofy not serious yandere story before I go to shleep. Gn everyone!

...I'm so fucking tired.

Warning(s): you drink a potion without knowing what it is, spoiler: it's a love potion, you get turned part mushroom, yandere Jade, unwanted kissing, crack I guess

"Say, (Y/N), would you please try this potion for me?" Jade asked you one day, handing you a glass bottle full of colourful liquid. "But you have to promise not to ask what it is."

"Sure, why not." You responded, sighing. "It's not like it'll make my life any worse."

Oh boy, you were wrong.

You drank the entire potion in one gulp, earning a surprised look from Jade.

"Oh my-! I... wasn't expecting you to drink it all." He said.

"What, is something... wrong with it...?"

"No, no! Of course not! Though, the effects may be a bit... stronger." He smirked deviously.

"Ugh, it tastes terrible..." You said as the taste finally hit you. It tasted like mushrooms, which it was most likely made of, knowing Jade.

"Fufu... have I ever told you how attractive you are, (Y/N)-?"

"Yes. Multiple times."

"Oh! Have I? How odd, I have... n-no memory of this." Jade nervously looked away from you "Now, I'll be heading off. Have a good rest of your day, (Y/N)."

"Yeah, you too, I guess."

If we're being honest here, you despised Jade Leech. But he's like, obsessed with you, so he's kinda hard to avoid.

What just happened is pretty par for the course. He'll just show up at Ramshackle dorm with random shit for you. Usually gifts and flowers and sweets and tea... and potions, apparently.

"Well, now that he's gone, I can go to bed... can't believe he made me get up at five in the morning just to drink some stupid potion." You said, a hand on top of your head. "Fuck, my scalp hurts..."

You went back to bed, hoping the pain would be gone tomorrow.

When you woke up the next morning, you felt very nauseous. And when you looked in the mirror...

"I'm gonna fucking kill him."

A bunch of mushrooms had sprouted from the top of your head.

You angrily got dressed and made your way to school.

Ace, after making fun of you for a full seven minutes, got Deuce to laugh at you as well. Deuce didn't laugh at you, but he did try to take a pair of scissors and cut the mushrooms off your head.

"OW OW OW OW DEUCE STOP STOP STOP-! SHIT WHY DOES THAT HURT SO MUCH?!" You screamed.

"AHHHH I'M SORRY PREFECT I WAS TRYING TO HELP I'M SORRY I'M SORRY I'M SORRY-!" Deuce cried.

Later, you ran into Idia (why did he have to leave his room on today of all days) and he showed you something on his phone, a cow made of cubes covered in mushrooms and basically said "It like u fr"

After being made fun of by everyone in the school, you barged into the potionology classroom, absolutely fuming.

"Ah, pup, we're in the middle of a class right n-" Crewel stared at you for a second. "...why, might I ask, are you covered in mushrooms...?"

"Ah, good! You're here!" Jade smiled. "Here you are, Professor Crewel! My homework! I have successfully turned someone partially into a mushroom!"

"You what." You stared at Jade, not knowing what emotion you were feeling.

"Leech, listen to me and listen to me closely." Crewel placed a hand on his head in annoyance. "As impressive as this is. This was not your homework...!"

"Oh dear... and I worked so hard on my potion..." Jade faked sadness.

"Jade what the fuck did you do to me?"

"Ok. I suppose, your new homework is to find a way to turn (Y/N) back to normal, understand?"

"Oh, there's no need, Professor! I assure you, the potion will wear off by the end of the year!"

"JADE WHAT THE HELL?!" You yelled out in annoyance.

"BAD DOG. Find a way to turn them back before the end of the year."

"Please, hold on a moment, Professor. Our homework was to create a love potion, correct?"

"...yes?"

"(Y/N), do you love me?" Jade asked. He knows the answer.

"Yes, of course I do, Jade!" You responded without thinking. What the hell. You absolutely meant to say no. What just happened.

"I'm sure you know (Y/N)... hates me, to put it lightly. And yet, they responded with yes."

"Hm... I suppose you're right." Crewel glared. "Though I'm not convinced-"

"(Y/N), do you want to-" [JADE PROCEEDED TO ASK A VERY INAPPROPRIATE QUESTION REGARDING INTERCOURSE BETWEEN YOU AND HIM]

"Yes of course! I'd love nothing more than to have you-" [YOU RESPOND IN A SIMILARLY INAPPROPRIATE WAY]

"Ok, no talking about sex during class, please." Crewel groaned. "Fine, you pass, I suppose. Why did you have to mix it with a potion that turns them part mushroom, though?"

"Personal interests." Jade responded, disgusting you.

"Leave my vicinity immediately." Crewel demanded.

Jade took you out into the hallway with him , and fucking kabedon-ed you.

"I absolutely hate you, Jade."

"Your responses earlier say otherwise." He laughed to himself. "Would you like to kiss me?"

"Of course, Jade!" You said, not wanting to.

You kissed each other in the hallway and the basketball club walked in on it happening and believe me when I say Ace and Floyd are never gonna let you live this down.

[pancake-breakfast]

It's too hot tonight. Please send ice cream.

At least I'm guaranteed more cool Livio and Wolfwood panels. For now.

Stream-of-consciousness thoughts for TriMax Vol. 9, Chapters 3-4 below.

Chapter 3: LR

Aww, Miss Melanie is doing what she can for the kids despite the situation.

They know the situation is bad, though. Kids are smarter than we give them credit for.

I'd bet Miss Melanie is faster than people would guess. And I'd bet the kids know it, even if they forget from time to time, because they've been on the receiving end of it.

Wolfwood sure left an impression on the orphanage if they're still asking for him all these years later.

I'm just... gonna savor this panel.

Also, I can't help but wonder with the way the text is placed. Like... it's Miss Melanie speaking, but with Wolfwood in the foreground looking wistful and in a precarious situation, I find myself wondering if he's thinking something similar, but about Vash.

I'm honestly a bit surprised Livio's giving Wolfwood the smoke break. Surprised, but glad, since Wolfwood's taking full advantage of it. He's in no rush to try and take down Livio. There's nothing he's going to savor in this fight.

Livio backstory!!! I like the part where he apparently sees Wolfwood as trustworthy enough for it. Or... possibly dead enough for it.

This is no place for a tired, lost, and frightened child.

Razloooooooooo

Gods, my boy needs a hamburger or something. He's way too skinny here.

It would be somewhat upsetting to continually find letters in your own pocket with no concept of where they came from.

Heh, someone means business.

Iiiits Razlo. Hi, there, buddy... The R to Livio's L. Bold move when the Japanese language doesn't distinguish the two.

"I've been silenced." That sounds... involuntary.

Looks like the smoke break's over.

Livio's smiling, but we don't get to see his full expression. Just the skull mask.

Livio with them high kicks. Even Wolfwood looks impressed.

Ugh, no killing Livio, Wolfwood! Not allowed!

Chapter 4: At the Verge of Death

Oof, that was a good, clean shot, looks like.

The mercs aren't happy. They're just now realizing their place in the order of things here.

Dude, headshot like that?? Wolfwood...

Ok, this is interesting, 'cause it implies he expects Livio to get back up despite getting shot in the head.

Chapel's too happy about this, the sick fuck.

Stampede Spoilers: It's interesting that they kinda gave this emotional beat to Legato in Stampede. Like, they seem to be writing out Chapel anyway, what with wrapping Eye of Michael more tightly under Knives/Conrad, and Legato's the obvious choice for someone who would get a kick out of the sadism of it all. Plus, of course, it allows that nice parallel language that he uses about not understanding the value of a love between brothers in Stampede. (I'm still not over that line. It's just *chef's kiss*. I hope anime-onlys get a chance to appreciate it after season 2. I hope it makes them twitch as much as it makes me twitch.)

Ah, here are the Eye of Michael guys. These are separate from the mercs. I get it. Not sure they'll stand much of a chance if Livio's down for the count.

Uhhh... maybe we need to forget what I just said about Livio being "down for the count."

You know, Bungo Stray Dogs has an interesting episode about what happens when you continually return individuals from the verge of death like that....

Oof, Wolfwood....

Ugh, this does not look good.

Did Livio just try to kabedon Wolfwood with his foot??

Livio's having thoughts. Common, buddy. You can figure this out.

How to Take Your Medicine Like a Badass: A Guide by Nicholas D. Wolfwood

Speaking of, he's gonna run out of it fast at this rate. Somehow I doubt Eye of Michael's gonna be open-handed with giving him more.

A:LKAJD:LAKJD:LAJDL:FH: I have too many feels about this panel. The genuine fear in Wolfwood's face as he embraces Livio to pull a move he's not sure is the right one out of pure desperation. Someone save them.

FRACK! That's all the time I have for this tonight. That's... fine. That's ok. No need to rush. No need to rush....

Archive

Trigun Vol. 1: Covers + 1-3, 4, 5-6, 7-8, 9-10 || Vol. 2: Covers + Extras, 1, 2-4, 5-6, 7-8

TriMax Vol. 1: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 2: Covers + 1, 2-4, 5, 6-7 || Vol. 3: Covers + 1-3, 4-5, 6-7 || Vol. 4: Covers + 1-2, 3-5, 6-7 || Vol. 5: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 6: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 7: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 8: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5 + Bonus || Vol. 9: Covers + 1-2

Extra Credit: Trigun Vol. 1: Nebraska vs. Vash's Motivations, Vash's Loneliness, Vash's Depression (pt 2 of post), Soupy Brains || Vol. 2: Coin Factoids || TriMax Vol. 1: Lina, Vash, and a Haircut || Meryl, Vash, and the Pursuit of Happiness || Vol. 5: Knives, Vash, and Hatred for Humanity || Vol. 6: Coping Series: Wolfwood, Meryl, Vash || Vol. 8: The Uncoordinated Counterattack

[cvbullshit]

I remember I had made a bunch of Harry Potter AUs and therefore have a lasting group of Harry Potter AUs that I need to refine. At least refine those I wanna keep. A few of the AUs were based on Undertale AUs though, since I was young then and kinda didn't grasp the point that UT AU stuff is original for a reason and such, so I really gotta refine those.

Imma list my favorites or use to be favorites.

There was an AU I did where Voldemort and Harry had fused together into a half n half fusion during their final battle and was doomed to live that life forever. I remember that they were one of the saddest AUs at first because they had gotten so tired of life at that point, to the extent where, in an off series I did in my head where a lot of people from the AUs plus a timeline version of year 3 Harry, Ron, and Hermione lived in one pocket AU for whatever reason, but the people who lived in that pocket AU actually took away their wand out of fear of them trying to kill themselves.

One AU I had where Tom Riddle was swapped with Dumbledore, dude was nice, became a father figure for at least 3 other AU characters, and I for some reason made it to where he WAS around Dumbledore's age but looked actually pretty young aside from some gray hairs.

This next AU was just kinda cringe angst at most, Imma keep it for memory sake but I don't think I'll ever be proud of it. The AU was if the Golden Trio got killed off early and became vengeful spirits/poltergeist/demons for whatever reason. Absolutely hated everyone who were against them. Though I do remember there was a way to save/redeem them, which started to happen to Ron and Hermione in the story canon. Harry though? Almost completely irredeemable to the point where he could be counted as a whole other entity entirely, named Evans. Evans is an actual bitch, this mans killed off Hedwig, Professor Trelawney, and Crabbe. Ron and Hermione over here though, learning to forgive and befriend Draco Malfoy. EVANS WHAT ARE YOU DOING.

Last one I'll talk about right now is my newest one that I feel like got the most effort into it. It was suppose to be a simple self insert AU but then kinda got turned into Harry Potter x CV with added self insert kinda, since I ended up adding Crust and most of his team from CV plus mixed Deonie with myself a bit. This AU also had self inserts for my friends too. Let me tell you, I am STILL invested in this AU, it's so fucking good even if it could be considered cringe. Honestly, went from me, my friends, and a few CV characters being there to a whole ass story that revolves around my friend's self insert and somewhat GREGORY GOYLE. Just, ahhhhhh! I love it so much, I love all the people in there, I'm even working on a online story for it(sort of, I'm lazy af), just AAHHHH! The Aurora Brumbley AU is one of my best Harry Potter AUs. It literally made me love Barty Crouch Jr so much when I didn't care for his original counterpart! I also believe this AU houses the worst Crust of all time, like, zero redemption for this man, full on worst version of Crust. I literally simp for Crust and I can say that I will 100% punch Connor Bove(This AU's Crust) in the goddamn face. Just, ugh! This AU makes me feel emotions! I am NEVER letting this AU go.

[shrimp-dumpling]

Main character

The fight went on and on with no hope in sight. An absent thought came to mind, well not much of a thought. More like a word.

Fiercer.

The fight needs to be fiercer. Swords clashed and thousands of sounds rung through the battlefield. Shouts, screams, commands, rush, rush, rush.

Evin could barely keep up, the poor boy lost in the winds of the death surrounding him. Stabbed one, killed two. Cut three, and...

"Urgh!- ugh... hic... hic....-" 

Evin bit his bottom lip, his hands trembling as he continued to kill his way through in spite of his injuries, like the soldier he was raised to be.

Pitiful boy, Evin was. Don't cry now, there's war going around you. Fight until you make it to your goal, for what other purpose do you serve?

You're nothing more than a single dot on a page, whose whole purpose is to entertain.

So fight harder, fiercer. Fight with more energy, fight like you're fighting for someone- you're the main character, act like it.

"Sh.. shut... shut ..hic.. up...."

Evin could only grit his teeth as the familiar sound of death, violence, and piercing hatred echoed throughout the field, the sound thats constantly there yet no one seems to notice, unlike you.

You whose entirety is described in words, whose every action is narrated, for not even a single breath is left out.

Know your place as the center piece, Evin.

Fight like you're actually worth these words.

"I don't- I don-"

And so, he continued to fight the enemies. With more energy, more emotion, with more desperation for an ending that seems so far away.

"Stop, plea-"

He continued to fight through the hoards. He fought through the enemy lines, breaking their formation over and over again, playing the card of hero and allowing his allies to attack.

The battle continued on like this, enemies dying left and right- just above the allies in death streak, for there is nothing else to count besides the E and A.

Was Evin starting to feel tired?

"Ple-"

No, he has to continue to fight, he needs to, else he will fall prey to death's grip much like the rest of his comrades.

'Let me die...no, i don't want to die... is death better than being alive?.. please...'

Evin thought uselessly as he continued to swing his sword. The line between friend and foe was blurred now. It just means it's now free game, isn't it?

Kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, KILL.

Evin collapsed onto the ground. Or well, that's a rather dramatic way to say it, it was more like he fell to his knees.

"Please.. I don't- want to- do this anymore...!" He sobbed, but time waits for no one, doesn't it?

It's inevitable before he gets killed right then and there. Get up and fight, they need you.

"I don't want to do this anymore..! I don't-" he sobbed out brokenly, pathetically, on the grounds of war no less.

"Please.. can't you just- spare me.. this.. one time..." pick up your sword and fight, your allies need you. 

'But do i need them?' He thought uselessly.

"I'm begging you, please.... please.. please- please!.." stop crying in the middle of a battle, you have better things to do than weep.

"I just.. wanted.. to live..."

...

"Hic... hic... i just... wanted to... live...."

Evin seemed to have caved and started full on crying his eyes out. He wasn't main character material, he wasn't even a main character.

He was just another victim, a subject to a glorified throne of paper that has his every move in ink.

As he cried and cried, he never seems to realized he hasn't died yet, or why it seems like the world was silent.

I'll give you this rest.

I guess main characters deserve their resting days, too.

|— —|

Random unreliable narrator thing i thought of. Idk if this is even like actually unreliable narrator, but cool :)

[shinshoyu]

//vent

i hhhhate how many things just keep going wrong in my LIFE like PLEASEEEE

everyone piles up on me all at the same time and i'm never mad about what i actually should be mad about i get mad about the things that shouldn't matter as much as they do like my microphone not being perfect or my headphones only liking one port on my laptop.

im just so tired of being angry all the time and idk maybe im trying to project it onto mediocre things so the big things can be dealt with and not snapped about but i snap about the little things that it's not even worth snapping over and im just. im tired

i almost started crying because my expensive headphones and my expensive microphone don't work or sound the way i want them to and it's just upsetting me so much. and it's not even a big deal because yknow what? so what! fucking sell the shit and get better shit! what's the issue with that? oh is ir because you're an egotistical little bitch who believes they're above selling things to get better things? fucking hell.

not to mention what im really frustrated about are people and school and i don't want to be upset about either of those things but i cant stop being angry abt them and it's like fuck just shut UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP

i try to make myself feel better and it gets worse and it makes me angrier and i think hanging out with people will help because it gets me out of my self depreciating moods but it serves to turn those negative emotions into different negative emotions that i bottle up because it's not appropriate to deal with them the way i feel i need to and it's just UGH

i just want people to shut the fuck UP your voices grind on my gears and remind me of horrible times in my life and you talk about your life that you barely have because of how fucking chronically online you are and you boast about all your fucking mental illnesses but it doesn't give you an excuse to not be courteous to others. ok yeah sure you're autistic well so am i and i'm still a nice fucking person. i cant even get a word in because you fucking assholes keep talking about things that make me want to die and if i speak up about it your ass pins any type of hatred you can on me. i don't fucking CARE what mental illnesses you have or what religion you follow or what color your fucking skin is i don't give a flying fuck about those things. what i fucking care about is keeping myself stable and safe and i cant do that when you accuse me of hatred for SETTING A BOUNDARY. i am SCARED to speak up for myself because the second i do i am attacked and i KNOW you would do the same thing.

like if you join a vc full of people in a completely separate server who aren't a part of your other servers or anything like that, should you really just be talking about what happened in your other vc? it's just the two of you talking. it's like you're fucking debriefing and the rest of us, or at least i, don't want to fucking hear it. i don't want to hear about how loud and chaotic and overwhelming the vc was. i don't want to hear about what scandal happened in the massive pool of voices you can barely discern. i don't want to hear about what game you played because it's always the same and it always reminds me of the worst, lowest point in my life and you just keep fucking talking. you keep going and going and going and you don't stop and let other people talk.

god and your fucking dni and shit are so specific like i hate to say this but fucking grow up. get a therapist and learn how to deal with your shit, because you can't get mad at someone for existing in their own space that you invade. god fucking forbid i like listening to melanie martinez and hollywood undead. oh no, i'm so sorry, do my choices that don't affect you traumatize you and now you have a new alter in your 500+ system? grow the fuck up. MY music choice shouldn't affect YOUR BRAIN. my BOUNDARIES about certain games and topics shouldn't affect YOUR LIFE.

like be so fucking for real right now. be SO fucking for real. if you have a problem with someone or something, fucking block them. that's the beauty of the fucking internet. if you have such a problem with those things don't hide it in your little carrd with all the other bullshit you hate, deal with it like the rest of us and get some fucking therapy. you need to learn healthier coping mechanisms rather than relying on other people to bend to your life. fuck off.

[bylightofdawn]

Okay so I think I'm going to be that asshole author who ends this chapter in a cliffhanger. I typically try and avoid doing it if I can but there's a reason it's such a narrative staple.

Also? I think this is the longest it's taken me to pound out a chapter since I started to re-write this fic. Holy fuckballs it has fought me every damn step of the way. I mean, part of it was not helped by jury duty royally fucking my sleep schedule up. I'm legit about to go to bed because I am still tired and trying to recover my sleep debt despite having prolly slept 50% of today.

But hey, chapter 25 is complete. Next chapter is prolly also going to be an emotional doozy because of super secret plot points I'm not going to go into.

After this I just need to head into the climax so HOPEFULLY, I'll be done in the next...ahahha I'm going to accept my fucking fate and the fact I am incapable of writing less than 10 more chapters of this fic.

NGL I kinda can't wait. I'm sorta ready to write other stuff and I'm questioning if part of the reason my creative juices have dried up isn't just from fucking burnout and the fact I've literally written NOTHING but this fic for the past now FIVE MONTHS. And anyone is going to be burned out after that point. I've also written an ENTIRE WHOLE ASS NOVEL AND SOME CHANGE. On top of having a full-time job so a little burnout is to be expected, I'd say.

I might pivot a little and poke at some other stuff if this continues to see if I can't reawaken my creative drive a little bit. I still have like what? 17 chapter buffer between what I've posted versus what I've pre-written so I have plenty of time to play. Though I am SWIFTLY approaching panic mode on chapter 13 which has an entire Jango and Obi-Wan scene I've been meaning to go back and finish writing.

Past me was all 'ahahah that's a future El problem' and it's swiftly approaching the current El problem so I need to get off my ass and actually write that.

But that's gonna be slightly in the future El problem because right now my head is pounding and I think I'm going to call it an early night because ugh I actually have WORK tomorrow. Blech blech blech

But realistically? I'm going to go read the newest post·mor·tem chapter cause I've been waiting for chapter 3 to get posted so I can read it all. So I'll prolly be up for hours yet. -sweats-

[justasmidgx]

Pretty disappointed by the ask you sent to Scout yesterday tbh. Not that it matters, I know. I just would've expected better from you, knowing how much against ARAs you are. I would've expected you might actually ask a rabbit breeder first or maybe read one of the numerous posts from people with experience about the issue, rather than just fly off at your first emotional response or go with whatever Scout is saying/believing. I hope you take the time to read up on it and at least be more educated on this issue. Idk. Maybe it's just more disappointing to me because you used to be one of the biggest defenders of myself and many other rabbit breeders. This isn't meant to be hostile or anything btw I just needed to say it.

Honestly? Seeing responses from rabbit breeders has changed my mind a bit.

I will say I'm not FULLY comfortable with the idea but I def regret how I worded that ask to Scout and how I definitely was looking at it from the view of other livestock animal, especially when Scout mentioned the chicken industry (which poultry industry in general has so many problems and to eeven think of comparing that large widescale problem with fucking RABBIT BREEDING in the US was idiotic since...rabbit breeding isn't widescale. There's no ~big rabbit~ shit in the US.)

I especially started to see differently when I saw breeders talk about feeding babies out, or even donating them to like...bird and wildlife sanctuaries and shit and I realized I came at it from an uneducated point of view, and I'll fully admit part of it was wanting to defend Scout because I'm so used to seeing Scout get idiotic shit from all sides, and they had that recent "you've bought 65 cows but haven't mentioned all of them" shit that I just wanted to jump in and agree with in the end, neither Scout nor I have experience with rabbits.

Like, you're ABSOLUTELY right that I cam at it emotionally and not with any educational thought behind it. I can't unsend the asks but I can apologize for not even thinking that there was clearly more to it then "omg killing babies for no reason and throwing them in the trash' when that's...so fucking obviously ARA shit.

And this doesn't come off as hostile, btw, I fully understand where you're coming from and I've been reading stuff from rabbit people since then (got this ask a day late cause I'm getting back to full time work and I'm not online every day, and I only use this account from my laptop, my mobile tumblr is set up with my main Loki account).

Again, I deeply apologize and I want to say that I do have some discomfort with it, and that's because I only have some information/education on it from what I've read over the past few days. And that my discomfort is now more along the lines of....ugh how to explain it? Like not "this is bad" discomfort but "this is new to me and I don't fully understand it yet" discomfort. Like how I used to hate dog breeding, then learned more but was still "eh but we don't really need it" to now wanting purebred dogs. (obvs verey different topics but I'm tired from work and it's the first example I thought of.)

I'm very sorry for letting emotion get the better of me, rather than doing what I used to and actually reasearching animal welfare topics that I don't know about or understand. I didn't form an educated opinion and that's on me. I'm so sorry if I hurt you or anyone else.

Sorry for the rambling response, I just...had already started feeling my opinion change and this ask gave me the opportunity to get all of that out. I think this discourse has started as very ARA orientated to be like "well yeah we don't kill baby cows so we're good but THEY'RE KILLING BABY BUNNIES FOR NO REASON" and to not even stop and go "hmmm this seems like BS" was so fucking dumb of me.

But yeah, you have every right to feel hurt and upset. Once again, I'm truly sorry.

[lokisprettygirl]

Hello, my lovely sweetheart, I hope you're fine 🥰. I'm so tired and lazy these days, it's not normal anymore 😴😅 and I'm so sorry that I've been pretty quiet and silent lately... but I feel so powerless 😶‍🌫️🪫

Anyway, it's not my style to pity myself and yammer so instead, I'm trying to say something relevant about the recent wonderful chapter 17 of LMTLY. Hopefully, you like it and it pleases you 😊

The whole chapter got me so emotional again. Y/n and Loki together are sweet like sugar. They try to talk to each other and I love how they open up to each other more and more. Obviously, they need each other and it's so adorable.

"Don't tell me what to do"...he wasn't trying to be rude, he was just trying to be dominating. He always had to be the dominating one, anything other than that made him feel wimpy.

No, he hasn't. He has the right to feel weak too without feeling guilty about it. There's still some work for y/n to do.

"...I'm here for you, with you" "I know sweetheart " "You don't...you have no idea how much I need you in my life and how much I appreciate you for taking care of me..."

"...Just the thought of being without you feels like...hell" (the hair grip...ugh 😏)

He truly wished he could have kept you safe and happy but he wasn't really sure if he was capable of giving you both at once.

But he tried and still tries his very best all the time!

"...I'll be here forever darling, we met for a reason, I was supposed to take care of you all my life "...he never allowed you to get yourself in deep trouble...he could have made you do anything he wanted...you would have obliged to make him happy and keep his attention...he still chose to keep you guarded, safe and protected from everything bad out there.

Does he even realise what he did and still does for her? He may be toxic but she's always been and always is his priority. And Loki needs her too. She's the cure (or a part of it) he needs.

...the warmth of your body kept him calm, your voice on his ears made him feel safe, your fingers caressing all over his back felt lovely...

But poor baby is still full of fears and we know why. I feel bad for him 😢

Together forever, right? I love that 😍💚❤️. Their whole conversation tugged at my heartstrings 🥹

"...you're not allowed to watch porn from now on...I'll give you a show whenever you're feeling naughty " ❤️‍🔥🌶

Hehehe, yessss daddy, we love to see it 😏😉

So Loki took also care of y/n's mother? It's wonderful to know that she had him to talk to and that she trusted him. Otherwise, she wouldn't have asked Loki to take care of her daughter...and she cared about her. It seems she knew somehow that something would happen to her 👀🤔...but she was so manipulated that she still thought the center was heaven...? Oh my....

And Loki feels guilty for not being able to save her life? I'm not sure if he was really too weak, maybe it was more helplessness than weakness...and he was alone, nobody supported him!

The relationship between Loki, his brother and their mother is really fucked up and complicated. What were Frigga's motifs and what is Thor up to? He fucked y/n's mother? 😲 OMG...and why does he want to hurt y/n? And he's going to do it on Frigga's behalf? I have so many questions again 😅

I'm more than happy that Loki threw Jolene out finally. She wrecked my nerves 😒

Loki hurting and beaten up breaks my heart. I love how y/n tried to help and talk to him...

...his need to feel pain just so his mind would stop screaming at him for a moment broke your heart.

"Hurt me" "Noooo"...

...and how she tried to cure and distract him...

...moved your head down to place a soft kiss on the mark giving him the opposite of what he asked for. He let out a small moan, almost sounded like a whimper.

"Hurt meee, please...I need it...I need to stop thinking " "Think about me then...I'm all yours to think about"

This was the point when I couldn't hold back my tears 😭😭. And Loki is open to her actions, he let her be in charge, control the situation (it's for the second time) so there's definitely a chance to change things for him here. I adore y/n, she found a good way to distract him, to make him feel good without getting hurt physically. And she just did it her way, she didn't listen to him and I love her for that...I would've done the exact same thing...

She tries to show Loki how much she loves him, no matter what.

This scene and the smut are so damn gorgeous, my Lady. Hot but so full of emotion, I can't put my feelings into the right words, my heart feels just so full. The sinful dirty talking, the god kink....THE GOD KINK 🥵🌶❤️‍🔥...

"I'm a monster " "Nooo....you could never ever be one...you're my angel, you saved my life...that makes you my god"....

The following whole scene was so filthy, kinky and so good. Please send help 😅😂😅😂. You're my goddess of delicious smut, dear... definitely 🥰😘

The last part scares me 👀😳. Odin was able to invade Nat's apartment. It is Odin, right? And she has a child now...I hope Loki is not the father of her child 😳...and she got tortured too...what an awful place this center was 😢

Lolo and sweet buttons should hurry up now 🥺😉...that was always on my mind. I think he wants to make her 'first time' perfect and that he wants to take his time with his sweetheart but... something doesn't feel right.

On the one hand, they could've fucked yet but didn't. On the other hand, is it worth it to hurry things up just for that devilish monster? Wouldn't they rather do it when it feels to be the 'right time, right place' for it?

Somehow I don't like the idea of 'let's fuck each other immediately so Odin can't sacrifice you anymore'. Hmmm, it seems to be the only way...and then I think they will do it whenever they want. I have no idea what else could save her from that Psycho but ... it's Loki's job to solve this "problem " 🤭😉😅. Maybe he has THE perfect idea. He knows everything about the rituals and he will always protect his sweet buttons.

Nonetheless...the devilish monster is waiting around the corner 😱💀

Oh my dear, I'm so hooked and with every chapter, this story is getting better and better. I love it so much but....I love you more😍, my Queen 👑❤️

Me gearing myself to read this

Don't apologise for having a life dear, I'm just glad to have you back 🥹🥰❤️

I don't think he realises what he has done for her, he's too absorbed in the "I'm the evil man who did evil things" feeling which makes sense for him but he never even stops to think about the fact that he changed the course of her life :( without him she'd definitely get herself in some sort of trouble, being how young she was.

There wasn't a relationship between her mother and Thor persay but more like they fucked each other sometimes, the cult was very open about sex and Odin encouraged the women there to sleep with his sons to purify themselves 😖

He was too lost in the feelings that I don't think he really could decipher that she was taking the control of the situation, he'll think about it later 👀

That gif 🥵🥵

This loki sort of have negative connotations attached to being termed as a god because that's how Odin fooled everyone at the center.. he's not.. he's just a human but on the side a part of him relishes when he's called one..he likes getting his ego stroked. He's a complex mam with intricate complexities.

About Odin 👀👀👀 we will see what he's upto.

Love you soo much ❤️

[dzpenumbra]

10/2/22

I started the day off a bit rough. I got on edge and frustrated over something small, then felt like the life just drained out of me. I slept like shit so it might have had something to do with that. Also started the antibiotics yesterday too. I don't know. I just don't like doing things that I'm not proud of. I just feel very obligated to be true to my emotions and work through them, rather than avoid or suppress them, because of how badly that has screwed me over in the past.

I'm very tired. I might try to just get to sleep.

I guess the only thing I want to share that's immediately on my mind is... well two things, I guess. The tincture... not sure what it's doing, tbh. I barely feel it and I'm almost to the highest dose. But my sleep had been getting steadily better.

The second is... I've been trying to barrel headlong through impostor syndrome and whatever it's called when you actually are doing work but you don't feel like you're working hard enough... whatever that is, that too. I have been neglecting the SketchDailies. I stopped working on Rimworld D&D. I paused the new Rimworld playthrough concept. I've been debating dropping livestreams entirely and just focusing on YouTube content. I'm just... very up in the air, I guess. The only constant right now is recording playing Session and snagging clips. The running plan is to do Instagram vids of one or two tricks that I'm learning/learned. Then release the full week of clips at the end of the week, like Friday or Saturday or something.

I don't know, I just... feel like I could be doing much more. I keep doing this whole like... being on the phone for 3-4 hours at a time thing, and the whole time I'm... not getting anything done. Like... I really need to train myself to draw when I do that shit instead of wandering around the house. Like don't get me wrong, I'm getting in good shape from just pacing in circles around my house for hours at a time. Might actually be burning too many calories doing that. So maybe I need to just train that. Or you know what... people could just come the fuck over to my house and chill and talk while I'm making art. That's a thing. I mean, they live 5 minutes away... And I'm moving in like a month.

It's so frustrating what the world has become. Maybe it's always been sorta like this, maybe the people I'm around just changed... I don't know. But what it has been in my proximity, it's been seriously impossible to get anyone to do anything. Make plans, get excited, work on projects, go on a damn walk, fuckin anything. I can barely get phone calls, honestly. I don't ever get texts. It's just so... sad. And then I end up in this weird situation where I actually feel bad about inviting people to my house, or to play games, or to go skating. Like me asking them is an imposition or something, like it puts them in the awkward position where they would have to give the implicitly obvious response "um... no..."

Ugh, I don't know what it is. But it got in my head pretty deep. And I'm really gonna need to recondition myself. I need to be around better people. And I had a mini-freakout earlier about that. How the fuck am I going to meet people my age when I move? Like... aren't they all parents now? Maybe I'm just sorta not really processing that fully on a day-to-day basis. I am single, in my mid-30s, never married, no kids. That's... not very common, is it? At least where I am, naw. I mean, I'll see a few people on dating apps that are also claiming that, but we never match. It's overwhelmingly single mothers, divorcees. Not that I have a problem with that, it's just... something I haven't experienced yet. I have never been a father. I have never been a husband. I nannied my former goddaughter for a little bit when she was real little. I took care of my dog and cat and tried to be a good father to them, once I finally grew the fuck up and took that role seriously. But never to a human that saw me as a father figure. And I strongly doubt I've ever been in a relationship with someone who liked me enough to consider marriage. So... maybe that's a barrier for me, and puts me in a weird category?

It feels almost like arrested development in a way, but the lack of distractions in this stage of life has left me cavernous amounts of free time, with which I studied, and drew, and played music, and played games. I learned. But I can never practice the things that aren't available to me, you know? Like... you can never get good at drums if you don't practice... drums. If you don't have a drum set available. You can tap on your legs and shit... okay, you know what, better analogy. You can't get good at singing if you never sing. There. I'm sure someone could find a hole in that analogy but I like it much better, it's very true. I can kinda tell when I listen to people sing what kind of context they are used to singing in. You can't practice projecting your voice if you don't have a space to practice projecting your voice in where it wouldn't be upsetting others. Like a practice space or a car or something. So that feels like my experience with social dynamics, romantic relationships and potential parenthood.

I want them very badly. I am scared of them now, which is very sad. It's a really big paradox in my personality that's been building friction. My anxieties and depression have been inflating a lot lately, I'm guessing my confidence levels are dropping pretty quick. It definitely feels like it, to be honest. The paradox I'm feeling is that I want more than anything to be a husband and a father, to have a family. My whole life I've wanted that. Now... I'm scared of it. I never have been in the past. I always was 100% all-in with it. I want nothing more than to be a dad to an awesome kid. Probably a daughter, but who knows. Maybe it's having gone through losing essentially a surrogate child. Maybe that's it. Fuck. I mean this shift is very recent... That would add up too... man, I'm really glad I journal now, I legit had no idea I felt that way.

I'm worried of fucking it up. I'm worried of having a kid who develops the same family stuff me, my brothers and my dad have. It's like... being very smart and creative... but also super anxious and withdrawn. I think it's a very likely outcome. I honestly think I could teach that kid more than anyone could have ever taught me... you know, because I put my entire life the past... 10+ years... into digging deep into the mechanics and meaning behind these behaviors. I have been exploring. The final frontier. The frontier of the human consciousness, exploring itself. I've learned a lot, I learn more and more each day. So... maybe it would actually be good. I guess I'm just sorta in-general scared now. I'm getting tired of it. Being afraid all the time is so draining.

I'm glad I wrote tonight, but I'm gonna wrap things up and try to get to bed early. This dawn to 1-2 PM sleep schedule is just kind fucking up my ability to get anything done in the world. I would really like to go on regular walks again. I miss being in nature, feeling my toes in the dirt, hearing the rush of water, the rustle of leaves, the birds calling and squirrels and chipmunks chirping. Tomorrow should be the day I get to revisit. Rest well.

[aegiswinged]

i read this month’s chapter and hoo boy does the hange character development make me sad

[theloveinc]

Catie, this has been giving me brain rot but I need to pawn it off on someone to make it leave.

Okay, so. I want to say "No" to Bakugou.

No, but listen. So he's been pining, right? Working up the nerve to ask you out because the first time you sassed him he fell head over heels in love. And you've been flirting back, so he's feeling pretty confident about this since there's been a back and forth for a good while (weeks? months? years?) between you two.

So he's like "Oi, you wanna get dinner or somethin'?" But you're dealing with your own stuff - maybe a bad date, or you didn't get a promotion at work, or you have a big project you have to focus on, or you're moving apartments, or maybe he just caught you on a bad day (spilled your coffee on your shirt, lost your keys, sank ankle deep into a mud puddle, etc). Regardless, you don't even spare him a glance, when you say "No."

And just ugh 😩 He's left dumbfounded and he leaves to go sulk, trying to figure out where he went wrong, when really you just don't have the time or the energy right now.

At some point down the road (days? weeks? months?) after still being kind to you and flirting with you (because he's not going to give up on you that easily, or even just get over you that easily), he tries again and this time you say "Yes." 😊

Okay byyyyyyeeeee

Anon......... the fact that you still want to brainrot with me🙇🏼‍♀️🙇🏼‍♀️🙇🏼‍♀️ THANK YOU!!!

Can I just tell you how much I literally ADORE this, too? I feel like you read my mind, too, as just the other day I was thinking about how I'm wayyy too busy for a bf/gf right now... so this is truly the perfect fantasy🥺

BUT ARGHH LKSAJDFAKSD... it's funny but it's also not, you know?He's too wrapped up in worrying how you'll take a confession to realize how hectic your life is....... and you turn him down because you just... can't deal with anything else on your plate (maybe because you don't realize his intentions + know you're not free, don't think it's serious, or are tired, spacey, grumpy... anything, really.)

But I'm also thinking about... Bakugo sulking over this BIG TIME (full on, spending entire weekends drowning in work or being sad on his couch, only moving when Kiri drags him around)... before slowly realizing just how busy + tired you actually are the few times he does stop to see + chat with you.

He starts getting worried; watching you run around trying to tackle work, all your shit at home, your emotions, chores, AND very normal slip-ups, like you said, anon....... and something just hits him, you know? And he feels like such an ass for trying to ask you out when you have so many other things worry about that aren't... him and how much he likes you LOL.

Anyway, he immediately goes from still being kinda miffed to like, wanting to help you out. Doesn't even care that you turned him down anymore, he just needs to make things easier for you again so you can (at least) start being his cheerful friend again🥺

(It's also making chuckle to think about, maybe a couple weeks later... telling Kiri + Denki, or maybe even Deku + Todoroki, that he was rejected by you... except they just stare at him kinda confused and go, "but... isn't y/n super busy right now? Like........ too busy for dates and stuff?"

And he's just: *tik tok sound* OBVIOUSLY I DIDN'T KNOW!!!)

...or you tell the girls about how you feel bad you had to turn him down for dinner, and they're like "y/n... he was asking you on a date..."

AND IT'S THE SAME RESPONSE LMAOOO...)

But anyway, don't wanna take your idea from you but... Bakugo goes from pining to doing errands with you + cleaning your house (and we could spend a long time talking about all the sweet moments the flirting comes naturally when he's helping you with something)....... TO finally asking you out again, when he KNOWS for sure the time is right...

And it's just the sweetest thing to know that he's been waiting for Y-O-U for so long and he's gonna support you through thick and thin, whether you have time for him (or coffee on your shirt) or not.

-

I love you, anon! Thank you so much for this!!!

[batstorm93672]

Robin was dying...

Again...

How sad...

Yet no one was here

He was going to be alone

Alone just like he felt when in the Manor at times

So much blood down his chest and on his hands. Robin was going to die and no one was coming, no matter how much he called for his family to arrive. No one responded and he was going to die all over again.

What does one do when slowly approaching death? Reminisce on good moments?

...good moments... Robin might be able to count the amount of good moments he had on one hand.

Talia would sing such sweet lullabies in Arabic, it would make Damian start to fall asleep at times or he would feel safer whenever Ra Al Ghul was too tough on him.

Another good time was when Damian was around Dick and sometimes he had good times with his father.

Even Jason and Tim made Damian happy at times regardless of how annoying they may be.

Yet no one was here now...

Robin was dying

The only thing on his mind was his family... if only he was strong enough to say such nice things to them. To tell Dick that he loves him so much. To tell Jason that he and him aren't so different and he's happy to know that. To tell Tim that he's sorry again and that he's happy to be his brother. To tell Steph that even though they don't hang around much that he appreciates her enthusiasm. To tell Cass that if he could he'd play on his violin for her dances for as long as he can just to see her smile. To tell Duke that he's happy that he joined the family. To tell his father that he loves him and is happy to be with him. To tell Alfred that he's glad to have such an amazing person help him grow and improve.

It won't ever be told...

Robin is dying and it's getting dark now, everything is becoming slow. He's brushed with death countless times and died before, but why does this one feel so... painful? Maybe it's the wound slowly making him bleed out? Or as his now Lazarus Pit induced mother would say "You've grown weak, you've become emotional"? Yeah maybe the second one... Robin knows he's emotional now, but he doesn't despise it so much as he used to. Feelings are essential to being a family and simply being human, Damian has learned... but it doesn't seem to even really matter now.

As said before, he's dying and no one is here. He's going to die alone and full of unfulfilled wishes for his family.

So dark now...

Ah, is this it? The final part of it all? Dying even though father went through so much to bring me back... It's hard to tell if heros get more chances after dying already. Probably not... so there's no going back. Maybe I was forgiven for my sins? Maybe... I'll see everyone one day again... one... day...

.

.

.

This doesn't look like Hell, Damian would know. No this feeling is... alive. Alive? Is he alive?

"Damian! You're alive!" Who was that?

"Thank goodness Master Damian you took quite the time to awaken"

"...alive? How... no one responded, when did you all care?"

"You got to be joking, B and Dickie here almost tore Gotham apart looking for you"

"Don't only pin this on Bruce and I, not with you grabbing bad guys and scaring them for information on his location"

"I don't know what you're talking about"

"If you two could stop being annoying in front of someone barely awake? We were worried for you Damian"

"That's funny... you all were worried? Tt I'm not worth it"

Why was he saying that?

"You're on pain medication, it's making you a little loopy"

"Hah I'm so happy you all came, I thought I was going to die again hehe I'm so flattered that you all care... I was just about ready to let myself go... no one answered. It was getting dark... I was going to die. I was so scared that I wasn't gonna see you all again and then I'd go to Hell and might waste the chance that father gave me to return... I'm pathetic. Mother was right I'm emotional and weak... but is it really that bad? To be emotional I mean... if I wasn't then, I wouldn't have ended up loving you all. Ugh I'm tired..."

It was silent and for a second Damian thought he was alone again.

"Go to sleep son, we're not going anywhere"

"Mmkay... goodnight father"

Bonus:

After Damian had settled back into slumber, everyone almost broke out in tears.

"Did that come out of his mouth?" Jason was in shock and awe.

"He said he loves us!" Dick was sobbing with stars in his eyes.

"Oh he's most definitely not gonna remember this" Tim scoffed as he crossed his arms across his chest.

Bruce leaned down and planted a kiss on Damian's forehead as Alfred smiled. "Goodnight Damian"

[millenialfanfictionaddiction]

Please Me: Oikawa's Oasis Part 3

⚠️This Fic is 18+, Minors DNI⚠️

Welcome to week 4 of the Please Me Series!  A collaboration with @axoxtxhxh! This weeks theme is Virginity Loss featuring Oikawa and Goshiki!  This weeks fics are broken into 3 parts! Parts 1 and 2 are linked in the master list below! Please check out Joey’s fic, Guiding Goshiki!  I will also link it in the Please Me master list!  

Warnings: swearing, slight angst, fluffy ending, virginity loss, kissing, male oral receiving, thigh riding, masturbation,  locker room sex, shower sex, unprotected sex, creampie, guided female masturbation, sub! oikawa, fem dom reader, petnames, one hell of a safeword 

Word Count: 5,000

Staring at the wall, you heard your alarm sound the following morning as you slowly arose from your bed.  You hadn’t slept at all since you had arrived home last night.  You couldn’t shake the feeling of shame and guilt for running away from Torū.

You’re feelings were valid, you knew that. But you knew it wasn’t right to run away from him like you did. You should have talked to him.  In a way, you probably made him feel more self conscious then you had your first time.  

You sighed as you got up to shower and head to the gym. You knew you needed to talk with Torū.  You needed to explain to him that none of this was his fault.  

Locking your door, you headed to the gym as you mentally prepared yourself for the conversation that would follow.  You wanted to tell him about how you were afraid you would ruin his first time.  How your first time failed miserably and that you didn’t want him to regret anything.  

Torū had become very special to you as both a teammate and a friend. You didn’t want to make his time with the team awkward in anyway.  You knew the conversation would be a difficult one but you had to do it.  

Arriving at gym you saw several of the other players nursing hangovers and you began setting up for the days practice.  You yawned as you went to the bench, to grab your notes as the teams captain approached.

“You must have really worn Torū out YN” he said nudging your side as you looked at him confused “he texted me this morning telling me he was too ‘worn out’ to come to practice” he said throwing up air quotes “I’m actually surprised you’re here today.”

Hearing the Torū wasn’t coming to practice hit your like a ton of bricks, the feeling guilty washing over you as you felt the urge to cry.  You turned away from the captain as he watched you walk away in silence, going to fill the teams water bottles.  

Stepping from the gym, you felt the tears flow as the guilt and shame of your actions washed over you. How could you act so immature?  How could you just run away?  

You cried as you went to fill the teams water bottles. God I probably made him feel so insecure. I’m such an idiot you thought to yourself as you tried to calm down enough to finish your task and excuse yourself to your office.  You could camp out there the rest of the practice, telling the coach you had some work to catch up on.  At least then you could cry in peace.

Torū groaned as he woke up from his small nap. He hadn’t been able to sleep because of what had transpired between YN and himself.  He felt so shamed, so inadequate.  These were feelings he didn’t often have, causing chaos in his mind as he jolted hearing the sudden ring of his phone.

He answered the FaceTime call to a smiling Iwaizumi as he tried to bring a smile to his glum face.

“Shittykawa what’s the matter with you?  I didn’t expect you to pick up. Don’t you have practice? Iwaizumi says as Oikawa just stared at him.

Iwaizumi was confused. He had known Oikawa for many years and this was the first time he had ever seen the former high school captain so gloomy. Even losing their 3rd year volleyball tournament hadn’t made the captain as sad as he was now.

“I messed up Hajime” Torū said as Iwaizumi reeled back.  Oikawa never used his full name.

“What happened? Are you ok?” He said as Torū tried to hold his composure in. His emotions were all over the place, he had never felt so vulnerable, so destroyed “Hey Torū, are you ok?”

That did it. Iwaizumi saying his name caused Torū to cry like he had never cried before. He wasn’t even embarrassed, not one bit. He didn’t have time to feel embarrassed. He felt too ashamed.

“Hajime” Torū said finally calming down “she- YN doesn’t want me.”

Iwaizumi was stunned.  Never had this ever happened. A girl didn’t want the Torū Oikawa?  What kind of alternative dimension was he living in?

Iwaizumi watched as his friend wiped his face with his palms, trying to figure out what to say.

“Uhh- well umm what happened” he managed to muster up as he tried hard to still comprehend the previous statement made by his friend.

“Last night, I went out with the team.  Things with YN got heated.  We came back to my place.  Everything was going so well.  Then I told her I was a virgin and she freaked out and ran” he said as he looked down, unable to make eye contact with his friend.

Iwaizumi couldn’t help but chuckle to himself and try as he might, he was unable to hold a straight face.  He laughed loudly as Torū’s head whipped up into view, sending glares at him.

“Dude, I'm sorry” he laughed “but please tell me that you just didn’t say ‘YN I’m a virgin’ and expect her to be like ready to rip your v-card from your grasp.”

Iwaizumi laughed loudly as Torū just continued to stare at his friend “I don’t think it’s very funny Iwa-chan” he said he  scuffed at his friends laughter.

“Boy, you really are lame shittykawa” he said chuckling “are you sure you really are good with women?  I mean I don’t blame her one bit!  Taking a guy’s virginity would suck!  I mean men really don’t know shit about pleasuring women so what’s in it for her?”

Torū thought hard while his friend talked. Maybe he had approached it wrong to begin with. Not that he thinks about it, his method of delivery was a bit hasty.  

“Dude, I think you need to just talk to her You don’t really know why she turned you down.  I mean it sounds like she likes you from the way things went last night. Maybe you just made her nervous.”

Torū knew his friend was right. You had never given him any indication that you didn’t like him and he knew that, last night you felt something just like he did.

Torū looked at his friend as he smiled “you’re right Iwa-chan I’ll talk to her tomorrow.” Iwaizumi laughed as he watched the light stream back into his friend’s face.  

“Good luck idiotkawa” he said hanging up as Torū laid his phone down.  It was getting late, well after practice had ended. He knew he should try and get to the gym to practice some before tomorrow. He gathered his gear as he made his way to the gym, hoping someone was still there so he could practice.

You had managed to avoid the team for the entire practice. The coach had bought your excuse and you stayed cooped up in your small office until after practice.  

You signed as you stood up from your chair, tired from sulking and crying the entire afternoon.  You grabbed your bag and locked the office door.  Thankfully it was Friday and you could spend the weekend sleeping.  You were exhausted but yet somehow found the strength to cry for hours on end.  

You approached the gym doors as the all too familiar sounds of volleyball slamming into the floor radiated into your ears.  You checked your phone, nothing that it was 7pm and well past practice time.  You approached the gym doors as you quietly peaked in to see a sweating Torū setting up a serve, smashing it straight into the net  

“UGH DAMMIT” he said shouting as he prepared the throw another one up, once again managing to net the ball.  He leaned over, placing his hands on his knees and he grabbed his towel and headed to the locker rooms.  He had only been practicing for an hour but he was just unable to get into it.  

You watched as he made his way into the locker rooms, following to the doors as you slowly opened them, hearing him shout from inside.

“Torū,you idiot!” he shouted as you winced at his words.  You felt awful. You knew he was like this because of what had transpired between the two of you the previous night.  

You walked in the doors, standing for a moment as you see Oikawa sitting on the bench, a towel placed over his head and his elbows rested on his knees.

You knew you had to say something.  You couldn’t let him think any of this was his fault.  This was all your doing and it was time you owned up to it  

“Hey Torū” you said softly as the locker room door closed behind you and Torū’s head snapped up to meet yours. He looked at you as you walked over to him, sitting directly in across from him on the other bench.

“We need to talk” you said as he put his head down, trying not to cry again.

“It’s ok YN.  There’s nothing to talk about” he said he went to stand up, stopping when you grabbed his forearm.

“No Torū” you said as you sniffles lightly “I need to apologize.”

Torū was confused as he sag back done the bench, removing the towel from his head.  He stared at you questioningly.  What were you apologizing for?

You played with your fingers for a moment as you tried hard to muster up the courage to talk.  You knew what you wanted to say, rather what you needed to say.  

“Torū, I’m sorry I ran out on you.  I shouldn’t have done that.  I- I just got really nervous” you say, still looking down at the floor as you took a deep breath and tried hard not to cry.

“When you told me you were a virgin, it made me nervous.  I remember my first time all too well and I- well I just don’t want your first time to be like mine was” you speak as Torū looks at you, still confused.

The whole time the issue hadn’t been that he was a virgin, it had been that you wanted him to have a good experience?  He was shocked.  Here he though the issue was him, when in reality the issue was your own self doubts. He listened as you continued to talk.

“My first time wasn’t good Torū.  I didn’t know what I was doing and I thought I had feelings for the guy but like he didn’t have feelings for me.  And I really like you Torū and I just don’t want you to regret anything.  The fact that you trusted me with something so special made me nervous and scares” you said as your eyes went up to meet Torū.  

He looked at you, staring into your eyes as he tried hard to comprehend everything you had just said. He felt awful that your first experience wasn’t good but he also knew his feelings for you were valid and now he knew you had feelings for him too. He continued to stare as he worked his way thought the issues in his mind.  

You frowned as you took his silence as a bad sign, sighing as you stood up.  

“Thanks for letting me explain myself Torū.  You are so amazing and you deserve someone special” you said as you went to leave the locker rooms.

Torū snapped from his thoughts as he quickly grabbed your hand, pulling you back into his as he placed a light kiss on your lips. He smiled as you looked at him, very confused as to what had just happened.

Torū put his forehead on yours as you smiled softly.  

“YN, you don’t get it.  I want you to be my first because of how I feel about you” he said as he looked at you softly. You had become an oasis for him. An escape from reality and daily life. You had loved volleyball as much as him and you had always been genuine with him.  

You smiled as you grabbed his neck, kissing him softly again as he pulled your body flush against his as he deepened the kiss.  He placed his hands on your soft waist as he moved his hand up and down your back as you grabbed at his hair pulling him in closer to you.

You break from the kiss, staring at each other as your lips hovered over his.  Your body hearing up as you could feel his erection forming against your thigh.  You kissed his chin to his neck as he pulled your pelvis in closer, grinding where he could, trying hard to gather any amount of friction to ease his aching cock.

He backed away from him as he watched in confusion as you approached the locker room door.

Not again he thought as he heard the lock click, watching you stroll back to him, pulling him back into a full embrace.  He needed you and bad.  He couldn’t stand this pain in his cock anymore. He needed relief and the only medicine was you.

You push him back to the bench as he sits down looking up at you as you smirk down at him.

“Torū do you really want this?” You said as he groans, looking up at your gorgeous figure.  

He nodded frantically as you took his chin in your hand “I need a verbal response Torū” you said as his eyes widened.

“Yes- yes YN I want this” he said as you step back, removing your shirt and leggings, watching him ogle at your nearly naked form.  

“Ok Torū, I want you to pick a safe word just incase things get to be too much for you” you said as he gawked at you in your bra and panties. He was having a hard time concentrating on the task at hand with you standing tall in front of him.

“Torū!” you repeated as you snapped your fingers in front of his eyes, trying to get his attention turned back.

“Oh shit- yeah a safe word, umm how about ‘Kageyama’?” He said as you stared strangely at the word.

“I’ve never heard of ‘Kageyama’?  What does that mean?” You said as he stood up from his spot approaching you as he grabbed at your scantily clad hips.

“Don’t worry about it. It’s just something will definitely snap me out of the mood” he said as you chuckled lightly embracing Torū in a heated kiss.  

Your tongue licked his lips lightly as he granted you access, opening his mouth to your wet muscle as you massaged your tongue against his, pulling light groans from his pretty head.

You tugged on his shirt as he lifted his arms up, letting you pull the shirt from his body as your fingers and palms run up his sculpted chest.  

Your fingers graze lightly over his nipples as he shutters and groans.  His body was so reactive to every touch, every movement. The fact that you were about to engage in intercourse with the setter still made you a bit nervous but you tried hard to cast the self doubt aside, wanting to make the experience memorable for both you and Torū.

As if on queue, Torū looked at you sweetly as he brushed the tip of your nose with his. “you know YN, we could just count this as your virginity loss too.  I mean clearly you are as nervous as I am” he said chuckling as you laughed loudly throwing your head back.  

“That’s a good idea Torū but I am experienced in pleasuring a partner” you said as you push him down to the bench “just be a good boy for me and let me take the lead, ok?”

Torū gulped as he eyes widened at as your form sunk to your knees in front of him.  This was really happening and in the team locker room.  Not an ideal place to lose your virginity but he was not about to interrupt you.

“Umm YN” he said as he looked at you , kneeling before him with your hands placed on your plush thighs “don’t you umm, don’t you want me to make you feel good too?”  

You chuckled lightly as you reached up pulling him into a heated kiss as he gently rubbed his hands along your soft arms.

“How about I show you what I like while I make you feel good, then you can try?” You say as he nods quickly watching your hands go to his gym shorts, pulling his erection free as he shifts his hips upwards, helping you to remove his pesky shorts.

Your eyes widen at his size as you think about all the possible ways his cock will pleasure your wet cunt.  You felt your core heat up as you looked up to Torū.  

He was completely blissed out. Lost in translation between here and fantasy.  He’s eyes sparkled with excitement as you tested the waters, lightly kicking the tips of his hard cock.

Groaning he threw his head back in pleasure as you smirked to yourself, going in for another lick.  Your tongue laying more and more on his stiffened cock as he writhed in pleasure under your control.

Your body headed as you watched his abs contract in the moment, his mouth hanging open as his tongue lolled out in ecstasy.  He watched as your fingers traced lightly from his legs to your own, peering down at your chest as your fingers danced lightly over your clothed clit.

“Fuck YN” he moaned as he tried his hardest not to come from the sensation of your tongue on his cock.

Taking one final lick, you stand up as you slowly remove your panties from your body, revealing your cunt to him as he stares at the wetness coating your inner thighs.  

“Did you- did I” he said staring at you as you laugh, pushing him back on the hard bench, placing one leg on each side as you rub your clit with your fingers.

“Yes Torū you made me this wet” you say as you widen his legs on the bench, his cock standing tall as you bend down, grinding your cunt on his lower thigh.  

“Holy shit-” he groans as you moan throwing your head back as his leg rubs your clit perfect.  He grabs his cock as he slowly begins to stroke himself, trying hard to concentrate on your moments and pleasure as he feels the wetness pool on his legs.  

You lean over, placing two of your wet fingers in his mouth as he sucks violently, causing you to grind faster and harder.  Your orgasm builds as moans and groans fill the air

 Your body heats up rapidly as the cord in your stomach tightens. Your pace quickens as does Torū’s as you feel the cord begin to loosen.

“Oh fuck Torū” you moan as Toru groans deeply, letting go of his aching cock to watch as you tip over the edge.  

“Come on baby, come for me” he says as the pet name tips you over the edge, your cunt pulsing on his thigh as he watches your face contort into pleasure.  

“That was so hot YN” he says he has gently caressed your arm and leg as his cock aches painfully beside you.

“We are just getting started Torū” you say as you adjust yourself over his pelvis, pushing his cock between your wet folds as your grind back and forth, trying hard to ensure your good and ready to take his cock.

“Fuck YN- I, I’m not going to last long” you say as you shush him, halting your movements.

“Hey its OK.  I already came so now we need you to come. How do you want to come Torū?” You say as he bites his lower lip, watching your pussy settle above his cock.

“Please YN- please put it in. I need to be inside of you princess” he squeaks out as you smirk at his request. You knew he wouldn’t last long inside of you.  One thing you prided yourself on sexually was your ability to ride a cock and boy was Torū in for a treat.  

You line his cock up with your wet cunt, slowly bending your knees down as you impaled yourself in his cock.

The stretch was delicious as Torū’s mouth fell open as he groaned and panted beneath you.  You knew he could feel the tightness you felt as you waited for him to adjust to being inside of you.

Torū’s hands flew to your hips as he tried his hardest to remain calm.  Your cunt was so tight and so warm around his cock. The pleasure was unimaginable.  All he wanted was to feel the release.

“Torū are you ok?” You said as you steadied your hands on his chest watching to make sure the man below you was still coherent.

“It’s so tight YN, please” he moaned as his hands went to your hips and you ground a little down on him as his core shuttered, causing his dick to jolt inside you.

“I’m going to go slow ok” you said as he nodded.  Your feet planted firmly on the ground, you pushed lightly on his chest as you propelled your hips up and down, impaling yourself on his cock over and cover again.  

The pace was agonizing for Torū as whimper and moans fell from his mouth.  You could feel your orgasm building and you knew Torū couldn’t hold on much longer.  You needed to go faster.

“Torū” you groan from above him as you continue your leisurely pace “I’m close can I go-”

“GOD PLEASE BABY FUCK ME” he shouts as your hips speed up, jerking his cock as you felt the familiar knot began to unwind “fuck YN I can’t hold out-”

“Almost baby” you moan as you feel the cord snap inside your stomach as your cunt pulses on Toru's cock causing him to groan and grunt.

“FUCK FUCK FUCK-” he shouts as his hips still into you, painting your walls white as he grips your hips firmly, whimpering below you as he tried his hardest to come down from his high.

He felt absolutely spectacular, like his body was floating on air.  He couldn’t believe how amazing his first time had been. He never imagined it would happen the way it did but he wasn’t complaining.  His body and mind were in complete bliss.

Coming down from your high, you laugh as you look at Torū’s blissed out state.  He smiles at you as he opens his eyes slowly caressing your cheek.  

“That was amazing YN” he said, breath shaking as he came down from his high, breathing steadily.

Your chest filled with pride as you felt sheer happiness fluid your body.  You had redeemed yourself and you had made Torū’s first time amazing.

Standing up slowly, Torū watched as his cum leaked down your thigh as you stood in front of him.  His eyes traced your form as he felt his cock jolt to life again, ready for another round.

Standing up, he quickly grabbed you in a bridal carry, running towards the shower as your screamed and laughed as he set you down, turning the water on and pressing your body against the shower wall.

“eww Torū, this wall is gross” you groan as his lips attach to your neck as you feel his erection growing against your pelvis.

“It’s fine YN, I’ll clean you up afterwards” he says as he kisses you deeply, pulling your body against his as he pulls you under the warm water.  

You break the kiss as you smile softly up at his tall form, water cascading down his body as you feel his hardened chest under your hands.

“I need you” he says as you smirk at him, turning around to face the wall.  You grind your ass into his already hard member as he grabs your hips, pulling you firmly into him.

“Then fuck me Torū” you say as you peer over your shoulders, watching Torū’s face fill with excitement as he lines up his cock with your still damp cunt, slowly pushing in as he slowly sinks deep into your hole.

“fuck YN- your pussy is just amazing” he says as he slowly pulls his cock back out, moving at a snails pace in and out of you.

“Torū” you moan as you mouth falls open  “give me your hand” you say as Torū’s hand appears in front of you as you place it between your legs on your hardened clit.  Torū moans when his fingers hit your clit as you rotate his wrist, showing him exactly how you like to be pleasured.  You let go of his hand as he continues to rub tiny fast circles into your clit as you propel yourself faster onto his cock, meeting his thrusts half way.

The air feels with the smell of sex and the sound of skin slapping as your ass meets his hips over and over.  

“Fuck baby” he groans

“I know Torū, just a little more” you squeak out as he picks up his speed, meeting your ass fast and harshly as his fingers speed up on your clit.

“TORŪ FUCK-” You scream as his hips still on your ass as he presses hard, his head falling to your shoulder as he tries to gain control of his breathing.

“Ahhh fucking hell- FUCK” he shouts as he chest heaves in relief as you both come down from your highs as he releases you and you turn to face him, kissing him softly as he grabs you, pulling you into a tight embrace.  

“Thank you YN” he says whispering into your neck as you smile softly.

After cleaning up and getting dressed, Torū helps you clean up the gym as you get ready to leave for the night.  Locking the gym doors, Torū grabs your hand as he pulls you along with him.

“Torū” you say laughing as the brunette pulls you hastily out of the building “my apartment is the other way!”

“Who said the night was over YN-chan?  I need to practice pleasuring you” he smirks as you gulp, following behind him quickly.

You sure were in for a long night ahead.

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