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sl33paholics · 3 months

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Let's Start The Day Together.

Retsu Kaioh x black!fem reader

Warning(s): mentions of mental health / illnesses (social anxiety n depression), body image issues, social anxiety

I've been having a shitty, exhausting week. I had a huge exam on Tuesday and am now off for the rest of the week until my other exam. Had a health scare, so that wasn't good lol so I wanted to make this writing piece for comfort. This is more of a self-insert, but lowkey made it an "x reader" in case people can relate

It's hot.

You can feel small sweat glands running down your face as you scratch your durag to relieve the itching you had from last night, letting out a huft as you lay on your messy bed trying to get comfortable. You don’t know if it was the fact that you just woke up or if you were going crazy but somehow, this felt like a dream.

You felt sticky.

You were in heat.

You shifted your attention from the ceiling to the small clock on your desk. It was after 1:30 pm.

Your body temperature felt way hotter than normal, especially since you had slept with a sports bra on with your long, baggy ass shorts. Your durag smelled like sweat, and your skin smelled disgusting. You didn’t want to go to work today. But at least the heat was tolerable. You tried to rub away some of the sweat with a shirt that's been sitting on your bed for days, but that only made it worse.

You groaned, sitting up and rubbing your temples. Your head was pounding, making you nauseous.

Taking a good look around your decent-sized spaced room, it was a mess. Sorta. It was a chore to clean up when you have containers filled with unused clothes that you don't bother to wear, boxes of items that you hadn't opened once you moved out those years ago, or even your books that you had yet to read. Your closet looked like there was never an organization to it whatsoever; your bookshelves were mostly empty except for your favorite books. You had no pictures of family that hung anywhere. Everything seemed to be in the same state you left it in.

Why bother to clean? You'd always ask yourself, no one visits. So why would you bother taking care of anything? Maybe you could take a shower. Maybe. Hopefully. You weren't sure what else to do to cool off, besides sleep. You slowly stood up, stretching your arms above your head while yawning. When you finally decided that it was enough to rest for now, you made your way into your bathroom.

At least you took care of your living room. It looks decent if you're ignoring the fact that it took almost a month to finally get off your lazy ass to do something about it. It smells nice and feels nice as if a huge weight got lifted off whenever you step out of your horrid room.

After you did your business, you couldn't help but look at yourself in the mirror. Baggy eyes, stretch marks from your arms to the lower half of your stomach, and your unkempt hair. As if you looked homeless. As if you were lost in a trance, you didn't hear your front door being unlocked and opened by someone who had a spare key. You didn't even realize someone was in your apartment until they walked in.

"Y/N?" a voice called out to you as you shifted your attention to the person behind you, Retsu standing at the doorway with bags in his hand. Restu must've come over here because he wanted to check if everything was okay. "Did you just wake up? Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt." He'd say, looking away to the side. You couldn't help but wonder if he wasn't used to seeing you in your condition. "I just wanted to make sure you're alright," he finished. His brows furrowed as he stared you dead in the eye. Was Retsu mad at you? That doesn't seem possible, but maybe he was just concerned for you? You shook it off, deciding not to dwell on it too much.

"Yeah," you replied awkwardly, putting your hands in your pockets. "I'm just feeling kind of under the weather right now... but I'll be alright." You trailed off, giving him a smile. As the two of you were settling down, you noticed that Retsu brought groceries and other things you'd need. You knew he was trying to make you feel better, so you appreciated it. You didn't even realize how hungry you were until Retsu mentioned food. How embarrassing, how did I forget about food? You thought, biting your lip sheepishly. It was quiet between you two. The only noise in the apartment was Retsu putting stuff away and making the two of you lunch. Once he was finished, he placed plates in front of you on the coffee table while he sat down across from you. You thanked him.

Silence. What was there to even talk about? You felt bad. Retsu did all this and took time out of his day to come to see you, only for you to not spark up a conversation. You let out a loud sigh. "Y/N." You looked over at him, noticing a soft expression on his face. It seemed to be a mixture of concern and pity. "Something's bothering you."

"Retsu, please..." You began. He held his hand up, stopping you immediately.

"Just tell me what's wrong."

"But-"

"No, Y/N," he interrupted sternly, "I've been texting you for days now. I haven't gotten one reply once. You're not looking too well, what happened? Your co-workers are saying you're not showing up to work either." Retsu would ask again. He was starting to sound annoyed. He leaned back on his chair, crossing his arm.

You sighed, knowing he wouldn't take no for an answer. "Okay. Fine." You looked back at your food, not sure what to say. The silence stretched for what felt like forever before you started speaking up again. "I'm just having one of those moments...y'know? I don't know. I don't think I left this building in a week?" You let out a nervous giggle, but you could tell Retsu wasn't happy with your response. "I don't have anybody who I consider friends that I can hang out with. I have work-friends. Not best friends. They do not acknowledge me outside of that, so I've just been in here in my room." You'd say turning your attention away from Retsu, your eyebrows frowning at what you just said.

Retsu didn't respond. You felt a pang of guilt run through you. He probably thinks you're a loser for talking to him like this. You rambled on how much it was difficult to wake up on time, and if you did, you didn't want to go anywhere for the day. You neglected your hygiene and physical appearance. Going on and on, you felt overwhelmed every time you looked in the mirror. You finally stopped your rant once you felt your throat clogging up and tears running down your face.

You sniffled, wiping at your eyes, hoping to catch them before you cry.

Retsu didn't move or speak for a few seconds, and then you heard him stand up from his seat. Before you could protest, you felt strong arms wrap themselves around you, hugging you tightly. You hugged him back as you felt your breath catch in your throat. "If it makes you feel better... I woke up around one o'clock. Last time, I woke up around six in the evening." You said with a chuckle to lighten up the mood. You let him go, but not before resting your hands on his chest to keep him at arm's length. You could feel your heart racing.

Retsu chuckled. "It does," he admitted. A genuine was spread across your face, the first one you'd smiled in weeks. You wiped at your eyes again before giving Retsu another hug. It was warm. You missed the warmth of him around you. He gave you another pat on your back before pulling away from the hug. He got on one knee before clasping your hand tightly. "I'm glad you told me what's been going on, Y/N." Retsu would say as you noticed his thumb was caressing on top of your hand. "And whatever's bothering you now, I'll do my best to help you." The sincerity in his voice was hard to ignore. You were touched by his words. "I'll stay the night here with you." Retsu would say, standing up again.

"You don't have to, I can take care of myself..." You tried to tell him. Retsu shook his head.

"I know, but that doesn't mean I can't watch over you, y'know." He gave you a reassuring smile as he offered his hand again to help you up. You took it hesitantly, allowing him to pull you up. "Let's leave in a few minutes. Getting fresh air is always good for the body." Retsu suggested.

You agreed easily, still feeling a little bit guilty for not opening up to him sooner. If only you had. But you were happy enough to have a guy like Retsu around to assist you during your roughest times.

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heesdreamer · 2 years

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SILENCED (4)

MASTERLIST

GENRE ➩ enhypen zombie apocalypse au!

SUMMARY ➩ navigating life 1 year post end of the world was already difficult as you avoided rotting corpses with hefty appetites and groups with various bad intentions. things get harder when you run into a group of survivors, 7 boys who make it impossible to run away.

WC ➩ 6k

WARNINGS ➩ death gore blood um zombies and everything the apocalypse brings…

AUTHORS NOTE ➩ Hello, me again lol Sorry it’s been so long since the last update on this I’ve had other stuff I was prioritizing but thank you to the people following and enjoying this story! The updates are a lot smaller than my usual works and that bugs me a bit but I have a lot planned and it won’t be such a long gap between each chapter from now on lol. Reminder to check out the playlist for hints and general vibe! NOT PROOFREAD but u knew that

“What are you even talking about dude, I beat you five to one easy. It wasn’t even close.” Jake’s voice was laughing out as he rested back on the couch, swinging an arm forward in emphasis towards his friend.

“No you don’t get it, if we had a rematch I’d whoop you.” Jay was quick to respond, a gloomy look on his face from losing so terribly and the younger boys broke into a fit of giggles at his attitude.

The day had been quiet, picking up each other from school one by one and heading back to Jake’s place. His mom had been out of town for the month on a business trip and it’d become their official club house for the time being, messier than it should’ve been with blankets covering any surface that could serve as a temporary bed.

Heeseung was pushing through the front door with a strange expression on his face, glancing behind in the hallway before locking the deadbolt and peaking out of the peephole. Sweat was coating his face and the other boys stopped laughing as they looked at him.

“It’s that bad out there now?” Jungwon was asking in a soft voice and Heeseung jumped a bit before glancing at him and giving him a solid nod.

News stations had been buzzing for weeks but nobody paid too close of attention outside of the people with particularly raging anxiety. Reports of cannibalisms, first in America and then the neighboring countries.

The boys hadn’t thought much of it, some crazy new drug that would never make it this far or mass hysteria. Then it was announced that it was a disease, something that couldn’t be helped and borders could not stop and things started to get a bit more wary. Some stores were shutting down, families leaving to their summer houses out in the country and yesterday Jay had been cut from work early.

“I don’t know, I don’t think we can wait anymore.” Heeseung was muttering and Jake sat up on the couch, raising an eyebrow in bewilderment.

“You mean like leave? Where would we even go?” He was asking and his question made them all fall silent, knowing he was right and they didn’t have a safe haven to disappear to like others did. They all had families but they weren’t extremely close now that they were older, spending most of their time together and only coming home to get scolded for poor grades.

Heeseung was shaking his head and turning towards them fully to scan the room, freezing up slightly when his head count came up one short. “Where’s Riki?”

“He.. had that exam I think. Must’ve had to stay late.” Sunoo was saying it slowly to try and explain but a feeling of dread settled over everybody at the realization he was out there alone, not yet realizing how quickly things were falling apart.

“Is it really that bad Heeseung?” Jay was asking in confusion, just yesterday they all were walking around casually outside of the few religious nut jobs screaming about the end of days.

Heeseung didn’t say anything for a long time, like he couldn’t decide if he wanted to relay what he had saw or if he just wanted to let them think things were okay for a few minutes longer. He knew he had witnessed stuff that wasn’t going to be fixed anytime soon, stuff that would change how they lived from now on and he wasn’t sure he was ready to fully embrace that.

He was clearing his throat to speak but the words fell short and he made his way over to the kitchen counter instead, taking Jungwon’s moms keys and glancing at him for permission.

The younger boy looked confused but he gave him a small nod, eyes widening a touch when the oldest hesitated before going back into the kitchen and returning with the largest cooking knife available.

“Woah, you can’t go out there with that. You’ll get arrested dude.” Sunghoon was rushing out, suddenly paying attention and alert now as he sat up off the couch and raised his hands towards Heeseung.

“I don’t think there’s anybody left to arrest me.” He was spitting out but he wasn’t angry at his friends, just stricken with fear and anxiety at the thought of returning back outside but he couldn’t stand the idea of Riki being out there alone.

“Well I’ll come with you.” Jay was announcing and standing up, wiping off the chip crumbs from his sweater. Heeseung almost denied him and demanded he stayed here and kept the doors locked but he figured he might not be able to make it alone and Jay was definitely the most capable of the two of them, strong and sturdy despite his carefree personality.

“The rest of you need to stay put. I don’t care what you hear, or how long it takes for us to come back, you can’t open that door.” He was warning the group and they all paused in fearful hesitance before slowly nodding, the idea of not searching for their friends after a period of time leaving them unsettled.

The two eldest were making their way out of the apartment building, stopping at the entry door to push a vending machine in front of it. Jay looked confused when Heeseung asked him to do it but he followed suit anyways, not wanting to deny the orders considering the fear in his friends face.

Jungwon’s moms van was large and loud, rattling when you pressed too hard on the gas pedal and squealing every time it forced its large frame to a stop. They didn’t drive it often, outside of trips to the beach and going through drive thru’s, and Heeseung was grateful that the roads were uncharacteristically empty as he amateurly made his way through the city streets.

It was complete silent as they pulled up to their youngest friends school, both holding their breath as they leaned forward to see out of the driver side window and try to catch sight of any sign of life.

Heeseung’s heart was throbbing and he felt sick, almost too scared to go and find the boy in case he saw something he wasn’t able to ever forget, something he wouldn’t be able to move past. Jay’s hand was reaching forward to take his arm and he glanced at the other boy, seeing him give him a firm nod with a look of determination. Heeseung gave him a weary smile in return but it was the boost of strength he needed to open the door.

There was debris around the area from the days of mild chaos leading up to this and Jay bent down to grab a particularly long piece of metal, steadying it in front of him like a baseball bat as they got closer to the school doors.

They were unlocked and they quickly realized something was wrong judging by the papers scattered along the hallway, backpack’s abandoned in classrooms like they had to evacuate fast and Heeseung could smell something foul that caused his nose to turn up in disgust.

“Riki.” It was a yelled whisper echoing through the halls, carrying the noise all the way down the silent building until it was reaching the end and bouncing back towards them.

“Hyung? Is that you?” A scared voice was coming from the end of the hallway, shaky and muffled like he was hidden behind something and the two older boys let out a sigh of relief at the confirmation that he was at least okay enough to respond.

They were swift in their approach towards the room the voice had come from, forgetting to be cautious because of their relief and rush to get out of there but they quickly froze when a figure was coming out of one of the classrooms in the middle of the hallway.

Heeseung automatically recognized the signs of the creatures he had seen earlier, staring at the man who was staggering into the hall and turning towards them with his nose in the air. His eyes were yellow and vacant and he had dark liquid around his mouth, still moving his jaw like he was finishing a large meal. The man groaned loudly in their direction, bordering on a screech and the boys could do nothing but stare.

“What the fuck?” Jay was rushing out in an anxious tone, glancing over to his friend who was remaining still and watching it carefully. “Dude what’s wrong with him, what the fuck?”

“He’s got it.” Heeseung was stating matter of factly and Jay paled at the realization, shaking his head in disbelief and faltering backwards a few steps.

Heeseung was approaching the creature slowly and they both jumped when it reared its head and roared in agitation, sloppily approaching them and not faltering even when it almost slipped and crashed into the floor. They watched it approached speedily and when it got near they both circled around it’s back, confusing it momentarily but not long enough before it was attacking again.

The creature pinned Heeseung back against the wall, his hands flailing in front of him as he tried his hardest to shove it away with cries and groans of fear. It’s strength was double what a normal man’s would be and he was seconds from giving up when it was slumping to the ground.

Heeseung dropped off the wall and scrambled over to Jay who was panting with the piece of scrap metal in front of him, dripping thick syrupy blood now that he had smashed it into the figure.

They both watched in horror, attempting to catch their breath, as it begun to rise off the floor again. Shakily standing back to its full height and snarling again at them, seemingly angrier now.

“Oh you’ve gotta be shitting me.” Heeseung was panting out as he stared up at its cracked skull, half of its face sliding downwards and a bloodied mess from the force of Jay’s swing mixed with days of decay.

Both boys watched it as it started to approach again and then Jay was letting out a loud scream, taking a few steps forward and swinging the metal back down on its shoulder. They both froze in anticipation and then fear when the creature didn’t react to the hit at all.

“Oh what the fu-“ He was cut off as the creature swung at him and he dove out of the way with a grunt. “How do you kill this thing?”

“Why the fuck would I know?” Heeseung was screaming back in bewilderment, glancing around in confusion to try and find a way out of the situation but coming up with nothing as he turned back to keep his attention on the man who kept getting more and more unhinged the louder they avoided him and his gaping mouth.

The creature wasn’t getting winded whilst the boys were barely managing to swing their arms anymore, using this to its advantage and catching Jay off guard. Heeseung watched in horror as it pinned his friend to the hallway floor, listening to his screams of terror and gasp of air from under its heavy frame.

He didn’t think twice before he was rushing forward, and throwing the entirety of his weight into its body. He let out a guttural scream and pulled his arm back as far as it could go before driving the knife forward into its softened skull. Jay was, thankfully, getting the memo and rolling out of the way before the creature slammed onto the floor, now fully lifeless.

Both boys collapsed to the floor in fits of gasps and pants. Nobody spoke for a few minutes from shock and then Jay’s tired voice was ringing out. “Dude… you just totally saved my life.”

It was silent again for a few seconds before Heeseung was letting out a soft chuckle, launching the other into a fit of delirious laughter until they were both cracking up with the body in between them.

“Holy shit.” Both boys were pausing at the sound of Riki’s voice, a lot closer now as he pushed his way out of the classroom and was watching them from the end of the hallway. “You guys totally killed Mr. Kim.”

“And then what?” Your voice was completely enthralled as you spoke, leaning forward towards the campfire so your elbows were on your knees and you thought you saw Jake’s lips curl up from the corner of your eye.

“Well… we went back to get the others. We tried to get to family but..” Jay was trailing off but you nodded in understanding and he gave you a grateful look before sighing and continuing with his story. “Heeseung found a map in the pocket of a dead guy on the highway out of the city and he had circled the general area that you found us in, so we assumed it was safe.”

“And it was.” Jake was adding and it was some of his first words of the night, having remained mostly silent and to himself throughout your trip.

It had been two days since you left and you knew everybody was feeling unsettled by the fact you were heading back home now to the unknown. It was a mostly uneventful journey, not stopping much or sleeping more than a few hours with a shared determination to get there and back as soon as humanly possible.

You felt like the universe had cut you a break when you arrived to the veterinary hospital Jungwon had seen on the map, only encountering a handful of walkers and finding some medicine that should do the trick fairly quickly. But you knew the universe wasn’t kind nor was she fond of handing out breaks so your stomach clenched with the idea of what could be waiting for you back at the camp.

Sunghoon could’ve died from blood loss and infection and passed along the traumatizing act of putting him down before he turned, or he could’ve turned in the night and taken out a few of his brothers before anybody was awake enough to put a stop to it.

You knew the two boys with you were thinking similar things so you’d ask for a story to try and keep their minds off of it, listening to Jay carefully as he recounted the first time they’d killed a walker and how happy Riki was that it was his mean teacher that often stuck him in detention.

“Heeseung was our leader before he was ever our leader.” Jay was remarking as he finished his story, scooting down more into the dirt so his back was fully pressed against the rotted log he was resting on.

Jake hummed in agreement and you didn’t say anything, thinking about the statement and the conversation you’d had with the eldest boy about the weight of his responsibilities. You felt a longing for him suddenly, missing him and the others more than you thought you would and you could tell the two with you were thinking the same thing now that it was falling silent again.

You didn’t say anything as you were standing up to stomp out the fire, knowing it was already a risk to strike it up in the first place but especially to sleep with it roaring.

The three of you followed the same routine as the past two nights, stringing up cans in a circle around where you were sleeping so if anything, dead or alive, bumped into it you’d have some form of warning before it was coming down directly on top of you. You laid your head down in the pile of leaves and tried to ignore the sticks sitting uncomfortably under your shoulder blades, falling asleep to the sounds of the forest and the two boys breathing.

——

You’d been walking for a few hours before seeing anything familiar but your body was alert to the fact you were getting closer to the camp again, this time with a backpack full of supplies and a prayer in the back of your mind that things would be okay.

It didn’t take long for you to realize something was off about your surroundings, the woods unusually silent and resting like all the animals and trees were holding their breath. You raised your hand and folded it, a silent signal for the boys to stop walking and fall into a crouched position behind you.

Your eyes were hurriedly scanning over the forest floor and your heart sank when you noticed multiple pairs of tracks and footprints that wouldn’t have been from your group, having no reason to venture this far out. You waved Jake and Jay closer and they quickly shifted forward in their crouched position.

“Is it a hoard?” Jake was whispering to you when you pointed out the shoe prints in the mud, glancing at you with a worried expression. Jay’s eyes were dark with concern and his face was hard, glancing in the direction of the others and frowning.

“I don’t think so.” You were shaking your head and sighing softly as you trailed your finger around the indented mud to explain to them. “The steps are too direct and pointed, if it was walkers they’d be messy and all over the place.”

“So it’s people then.” Jay was saying matter of factly and you all feel into a heavy silence, knowing you had no choice but to continue on the path back home, regardless if there was anybody left waiting for you or not.

You didn’t bother wasting anytime, falling into fast and silent footsteps and you maneuvered your way through the woods, guns drawn and knives out of your holster in case any of the people were still around and surveilling the surrounding woods.

Jay caught sight of something long before you did and you were grateful for his hand that shot out to stop you from rushing right into the view of the man you could now see, pacing back and forth in the center of the little houses and keeping an eye out for anything out of place.

You lip curled up in a sneer but you weren’t exactly sure what to do. If it was up to you, you’d simply take him out from a distance but you didn’t know how many were inside with the boys and if any more were not here, not wanting to risk the safety of the others or the three of you by acting on impulse. Jake seemed to be thinking something similar considering he was tapping your shoulder to get your attention, indicating down to your knives after you looked at him.

You understood what he was implying but you stared at him for a few seconds to make sure he was certain, realizing you hadn’t yet discussed the groups morals when it came to the living.

His eyes were hard as he gave you a solid nod and he mouthed for Jay to have your back as you moved in silent towards the patrol. The man didn’t have time to react before you were behind him, listening to the sound of Jay whistle and bring his attention forward before you were wrapping your hand around his forehead and tilting his head back so his neck was fully exposed to you.

He let out a gurgled shout as you slid your knife across his throat, grunting softly under his weight as you tried to lower him to the ground as silently as possible.

You looked up at Jay after he was on the ground, watching him carefully as he gave you a small nod of acceptance and you sighed softly before returning it to him and waiting for Jake to come out of the woods and meet you. The three of you ducked against one of the houses, your backs pressed against the wood as you listened to try and get a guess of how many people were inside.

“I say we just kill him already.” It was a woman’s voice and she was speaking in a nasty rasp like she was a heavy smoker, your heart pounding at the sentence she spoke. “He’s half dead already, I’ll be pissed if he turns on us and takes a chunk out of my arm.”

You glanced at Jake after she was done speaking and he was already looking at you, both of you relieved to hear that she was talking about Sunghoon still being alive, immediately followed by the dread of what she was implying they should do.

“Touch him and you’ll have bigger problems than him turning.” Heeseung’s voice was speaking now and it was dropped to an octave you’d never heard it in before, cold and serious and he threatened her in a deadly tone.

You heard an annoyed scoff from a male voice before it was followed by the sound of low groans of pain that you made out to be Sunghoon’s, wincing slightly at the hurt in his cries.

“Do something then.” The males voice was speaking in a teasing manner and you heard Sunghoon groan again, likely being hit or kicked by somebody inside to prove a point towards the other boys helplessness. “Oh.. you can’t, that’s right. I forgot.”

There was more sounds after that but you couldn’t fully tell what they were, feeling sick and helpless where you were sitting until Jay was snapping his fingers and getting both of your attention back on him.

He was making signals with his hand and you swiftly understood that he was implying he wanted to rush inside and take them out before they had a chance to react or take any hostages, using the element of surprise to your advantage. Jake seemed more hesitant in the idea although you figured it was only the two of them inside the small house, seeing the car they had arrived it and doubting it could fit more than four people.

Your eyes wandered over to the body on the ground and you steadied your footing in the dirt before nodding softly to Jay and patting Jake on the back.

It went extremely fast, your mind on complete autopilot and devoid of any extreme emotion to help you get through the terrible act without hesitating or missing your shot. Jake was kicking the door open roughly and then stepping back to allow you and Jay to rush forward, relief rushing through you at the confirmation it was only two people and then followed by horror considering how easily you were able to sink your knife into the skull of the woman.

She’d barely had a second to process your arrival, eyes widening in fear and letting out a painful gasp of shock before her face was lifeless and she was crumbling to the floor.

You felt slightly sick that it had been so easy for you to kill two people in the span of minutes but you glanced up at the scared boys huddled around the house and you realized that you didn’t regret it, that you’d do it 100 times again if it was necessary.

Heeseung was tied to the radiator next to Sunghoon, clarifying the reason he hadn’t even able to stop their assault on the boy and you glanced at him to see him far paler and more lifeless than he had been when you’d seen him. He was still alive however and you were rushing to grab the supplies from your bag when you noticed the horror on the boys faces, eyes over your shoulder.

You froze up but before you could turn to see what they were seeing, a shot was ringing out close to your ear and you were completely disoriented for a few seconds.

It took awhile to process what had happened, turning your body in a panic to see a fourth man laying in the doorway of the house. His knife was still rattling against the floor from where he’d dropped it and you saw the exit wound coming out from the backside of his head. You spun back around and your heart crumbled when you saw who it was that had killed the man, saving your life by taking another’s.

Riki was holding the gun in shaky hands, barely able to keep it steady and his eyes were wide in shock and horror, keeping it pointed in your direction despite the threat being gone now.

“Riki.” You were saying softly, still frozen but raising your hands in surrender and taking a small step towards him. You didn’t necessarily think he would hurt you but he clearly wasn’t thinking straight and his fingers were still dangerously tight around the trigger. “Riki, it’s okay. You got him, he’s dead.”

His eyes shot to yours at the words and his face softened slightly, letting you approach and take the gun from his rigid hands.

He was dropping his shoulders in relief once the metal was out of his hands, shocking you by pulling you in for a tight hug that knocked the air out of your lungs. You returned it after a few seconds, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and squeezing him tightly with your eyes shut. You could hear the others moving around, untying Heeseung and greeting the others.

After Riki let you go and went to sit down in the corner and calm down, you quickly administered the medication into Sunghoon’s veins and sighed softly at the heavy breath he took at the feeling of it entering his system. You pushed his damp hair off his sweaty forehead and smiled softly at him even though he couldn’t see it, happy he had managed to fight for this long.

You were standing up again and immediately bumping into another frame, pausing until you realized it was Heeseung.

His hands were coming up to cup your face and you smiled at him in relief despite the cuts on his face and the noticeable black eye that you imagined had come from the struggle with the looters that had led to him being the only one tied up. “You gave them hell didn’t you.”

He laughed softly at your words and nodded his head, eyes gentle as he looked down at you and you felt your heart clench uncomfortably at both his expression and how much you had missed him.

You thought this about them all as the night continued on, telling them how your run had gone and listening to them laugh and tell funny stories that you didn’t fully understand but you still felt a lightness in your heart just from how excited they sounded about remembering the smallest details of things that had happened to them together in the old world.

Riki was still a but subdued after what had happened, not speaking much and staying in the corner as you all ate dinner and took sips from the liquor bottle the three of you had found on the trip. He seemed a bit out of it and your heart felt heavy after Jungwon had leaned in to whisper and explain to you that he had never killed somebody before.

You felt guilty that he had done something like that to save you, your own mistake for not assuming there was another person still outside or checking the tracks more carefully because you were too worried about them and too focus on getting inside as soon as possible. Your care was making you stupid and making you weak, leaving the youngest to lose a piece of himself to fix your mistake.

It was this that made up your mind for you, solidifying that you couldn’t stay here with them any longer or else things like this would keep happening. You’d have to continue to risk yourself for them and vice versa, you couldn’t take watching them hurt themselves in the name of saving you or each other and you knew now that they were always going to put the others and you over themselves individually.

You kept reminding yourself this as you silently packed your bag, waiting for the others to fall asleep and leave you on watch duty before you were preparing to slip out.

You’d stay in the woods outside the camp for the night and make sure nothing hurt them during your watch cycle and then you were going to disappear into the dark cover of the trees once the next person on the rotation woke up and found you missing. You left them all of the medication and food, taking nothing but your change of clothes and your knives.

The crickets were extra loud as you made your way outside, having carefully stepped over the sleeping boys and left a note with detailed instructions on which medications to give to Sunghoon and when. You included a small goodbye sentence just so they knew you hadn’t been taken and didn’t get hurt trying to find you, although you had a feeling they’d try anyways.

You were barely off the porch, your foot hitting the dirt softly and feeling the cold chill of the night when a voice behind you was causing you to jump and spin around.

“So that’s it then?” You whipped around with wide eyes but your face crumbled when you realized who it was, seeing Heeseung come out of the shadows with a hurt expression and hooded eyes. “You’re not even going to say goodbye?”

You froze as you looked at him, words falling short as your mouth open and closed in silence. He scoffed as he looked at you, turning his head away as his eyes teared up slightly but he shook his head in anger before taking a few steps in your direction with a raised accusatory finger.

“You’re just going to leave after all this?” He was spitting out at you and the tone of his voice, the disgust lacing his words, made your heart drop into your stomach with a crushing weight.

“I have to.” You replied back with desperation, your face curling up in anguish and you tried to get him to understand even slightly what your reasoning was. “Sunghoon almost died Heeseung, and Riki he… these things will keep happening.”

“He didn’t die.” He was almost yelling now and you flinched back at the volume of his voice, having half a mind to shush him softly and watching the way his face curled up in anger at the sound slipping through your lips. “He didn’t die Y/N, and you were the one who made sure of that. You care about us, I know you do.”

You didn’t know how to reply to that, not wanting to correct him especially when he wasn’t wrong.

You did care about them and it was making your skin crawl every time you found yourself smiling affectionately at one of their offhanded jokes or paying extra attention to their wounds and bruises. Even more so with the boy in front of you with the gentle way he touched you to make sure you weren’t injured, when his face was lit up by campfires or his determination to lead a group of boys through a world he himself didn’t understand.

“I can’t watch it happen.” Your voice was breaking and your shoulders sagged in upset, exhaustion wracking through you both emotionally and physically. “And it always happens, Hee.”

“It won’t happen this time.” He was taking more steps towards you and his hands were shakily coming up to hold your face, staring down at you with his own sense of determination to try and help you see his side of things. “Why didn’t you say bye to me?”

He was asking but you knew he already knew your answer and you tried to pull out of his touch to avoid answering, stopping when his thumb was gently rubbing your cheek and shaking his head to try and stop you.

“Because you wouldn’t be able to leave.” He was answering for you, filling in the blank and giving you a soft sad smile that made you break into a sob, your first time allowing yourself to cry for as long as you could remember. “Right? Tell me I’m right.”

You didn’t say anything but you didn’t need to, feeling him pull you in tightly against his chest as you fully let yourself feel the wave of your emotions, restricting them for so long in the name of survival and fighting to make it through the day.

Heeseung was keeping you in his embrace even when your legs were giving out and you were sinking to the floor in his arms, your hands hitting the dirt and feeling it mold between your fingers. You hooked your head over his shoulder and shut your eyes tight when your gaze fell on the body of the man you’d killed so easily earlier.

You let him hold you like that until your sobs were slowing down and the blood was drying in the grass.

You stayed like that far longer than you’d realized, sitting still and frozen until your cries slowed down and his blood had fully dried in the grass.

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x-uno · 1 year

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Troubled Youth. | OPLA HS!AU x reader

︵͡ ⁺ here it is everyone, OPLA Highschool ! AU - (:

𓇼 - - - - - - - - 𓇼 - - - - - - - - 𓇼

CHAPTER 1. | LIBRARY FIASCO

WELL SHIT, this isn’t how you pictured your week would go.

Beside you, a boy with unruly green hair walked in silence. His stoic expression remained unchanged, and you couldn't help but feel a sense of unease in his presence.

A heavy cloud of frustration hung over you. Exams, stress, and late-night study sessions had been enough to worry about, but now you had a broken door and a disciplinary issue to contend with.

"I can't believe I got roped into this."

He glanced at you, gaze steady. "Yeah, well, shit happens. Can't change it now."

"I've been studying like crazy, and now this," You continued, voice tinged with frustration. "It's like the universe is conspiring against me." Stupid universe. Haven’t you suffered enough as it is? The whole situation was absurd, and the fact that you were now the talk of the school only added insult to injury.

"And it had to be the library door, of all things! The one place I couldn't afford to get in trouble. Just my luck."

The whispers and curious glances from your classmates only fueled your frustration. You and him were the center of attention now, the students responsible for breaking the library's entrance. It was a far cry from the low-profile, diligent student you had always aimed to be.

As you reached the school's disciplinary office, the principal, Mr. Garp greeted you both with a stern expression. "Y/N, Zoro," Mr. Garp began, his tone grave. "I hope you both understand the gravity of what happened. Breaking the library's entrance door is not something we take lightly here at this school."

You stammered, trying to explain, "It was an accident, Mr. Garp. We didn't mean to—"

Zoro interrupted, his voice steady, "We'll take responsibility for the damage and make sure it gets fixed."

Mr. Garp raised an eyebrow, impressed by Zoro's straightforward approach. "Very well. But this won't go unpunished. You'll have to do some cafeteria service to make up for this, and I'll have a word with your teachers about your upcoming exams."

Y/N sighed in relief that Mr. Garp was willing to consider their explanation and that they wouldn't face harsher consequences. Cafeteria service didn't sound pleasant, but it was better than the alternative.

"Thank you, Mr. Garp." Y/N said, grateful for the somewhat lenient decision.

With that, you were dismissed from Mr. Garp's office, and the weight of your situation sank in even further.

YESTERDAY.

Exams were looming, and the pressure was mounting. You had decided to put in some late-night hours at the school library, determined to cram in as much knowledge as possible before the dreaded tests the next day.

You settled into a quiet corner, surrounded by a fortress of textbooks, notebooks, and hastily scribbled notes. The clock on the wall seemed to tick faster with each passing minute, a constant reminder of the impending exams.

As you delved into your books, your focus was unwavering, your determination resolute. You knew that this late-night session could make all the difference between success and failure. But as the hours dragged on and exhaustion began to claw at your senses.

The fatigue settled in, and your eyelids grow heavy. With a deep sigh, you decided to rest your head on your arms for just a brief moment, thinking a short nap might recharge your energy.

CRASH!

You jolted awake, disoriented and bewildered.

The glass door leading to the library had been shattered.

You quickly scanned the scene, realizing you are not alone in this bizarre predicament. The culprit stood before the door, fists clenched.

"What the fuck, dude?" You stammered, mind racing to comprehend the situation.

He seemed equally taken aback by your presence, perhaps not expecting anyone to be in the library at this late hour. His eyes darted around, assessing the situation. "I didn't expect anyone to be here," he muttered, his voice filled with a mix of frustration and surprise.

You couldn't help but notice the chaos you were now part of. The glass shards on the floor, the frigid night air rushing in, and the impending threat of getting caught in a mess.

"Wha- what are you doing? Why did you punch the door? What did the door do to you?!" You asked, trying to sound more assertive than you felt, you stood up from your makeshift study area, books and notes scattered on the table. The adrenaline coursing through your veins began to drive away the remnants of sleep, and you needed answers quickly.

''We got locked out.''

You frowned at his response, finding it difficult to believe that someone would resort to breaking into a library because they got locked out.

"Locked out?" you repeated, still trying to wrap your head around the situation. "Breaking the door was your solution to being locked out of the library?"

"Do you have a better suggestion?" he retorted.

"Yeah," you replied, your voice tinged with exasperation. "Ever heard of calling for help? or maybe even waiting until the library opens again? Breaking the door should have been your last resort."

"Look, I didn't want to be stuck out here all night."

You couldn't help but shake your head at the absurdity of the situation. "Well, you certainly made a mess of things. Now we're both in trouble."

───

taglist: reply to be added !

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celandeline · 8 months

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Summer of Like // Farleigh Start x OC (1)

“Yes… New York, that’s correct. JFK, if that’s possible, but LaGuardia works too if… you’re sure the closest flight you have is next Monday?” I run a hand down my face, and flop back against my dorm bed, cell phone wedged between my shoulder and my ear. “Sure, fuck it, put me on a waitlist. Yes, call me if a seat opens up… yes, this number is the quickest way to reach me.” I stare up at the ceiling as the receptionist talks, her polite, Britishness, beginning to grate. “Yes, thank you. Bye.”

I snap my phone closed and toss it as far away from me as I can with a groan. It’s sweltering, it’s exam week, and I can’t get a fucking flight home to Brooklyn for the life of me. The dorm is half packed - clothes and shoes from the winter stowed away in trunks, along with all of the non-essentials (decor and trinkets and the like). The rest of my belongings are scattered around, collateral damage from the mess of the last weeks of school. I long for the streets of New York - I haven’t had a bodega sandwich in almost a year. “If I have to stay on this stuffy-ass pretentious campus for even a week longer than I have to I might just slit my wrists in the fucking bath.” I say, mostly to the ceiling. I am so tired of Cambridge.

“Jesus, Evie.”

I sit up to look at Venetia - my flatmate, and one of my only friends here. She’s one of the prettiest girls I’ve ever seen. She’s maybe the only person in the world that can make bottle blonde look high end. Somehow she toes the line between cute and sexy without seeming like she’s trying too hard - on anyone else, dark grunge eye makeup and a button nose would look silly, but on her… she’s like Helen of Troy in Saint Laurent sunglasses. She's a good angel sent to make my year at Cambridge so, so much easier. It’s hard to make friends as an American exchange student at one of the most pretentious English schools in the world. Harder still when Venetia is also something of an outcast herself. I don’t care much though - she’s worth ten of these other British schoolgirls. “Sorry.”

She barely glances up at me, too busy filing her nails into rounded almond points at my desk, little flakes of old nail polish falling all over my schoolwork scattered there. “It’s your own fault for leaving it until exam week.”

“I know.” I say. I really should have booked a flight back home sooner, but it’s hard to remember to do anything else when you’re drowning in schoolwork and vodka at the same time. “I just didn’t think it would be such a pain in the ass to get home. I mean really, it’s like the whole fucking country’s just decided to go to New York. I’m on seven waitlists to fly economy, V. And I still have finals to do.”

She grins down at her fingernails. “New Yawk.” She snickers, mocking my accent. “Still so American, even after a whole year here.”

“Might be two years if I don’t get a flight home.” I grumble, swinging my legs over the edge of the bed. “What color are you doing this time?”

Venetia holds up two bottles - one a dark gray, one more of a silver. “I’m thinking gunmetal underneath, silver on top.” She says conversationally, turning back to the desk to focus on her nails. “You could always come to Saltburn with me.”

“What?” I say, taken aback by her nonchalance. “V- c’mon. I can’t just go live in your family’s castle at the last minute, I mean, we leave campus in like two days.” These rich kids - I swear they think anything can happen at the snap of their pretty fingers. And she does have quite pretty fingers.

She shrugs. “It’s not that big of a deal - I mean, Felix brings someone home every year. Never the same person either.” She grins. “He’s a bit of a slut - in that way.”

“We leave campus in two days.” I repeat. Venetia - for all her lovely qualities - sometimes forgets about the logistics of things. I mean, if I was fuck-off rich, I’m sure I would too, but there just isn’t enough time for arrangements to be made for me to stay at her family’s mansion. It’s a generous offer, but… “I don’t want to just show up V, that’s so presumptuous. Rude, even. And I’ve got a whole year's worth of stuff with me, I can’t just lug it all to your house.”

“But you so totally can.” Venetia says, swiping nail polish over her fingertips. “There are at least six bedrooms that no one uses Evie, it would be no problem at all. And there’s more than enough room for all your luggage. Really, the house is just begging to have more people in it - why do you think Mum throws so many parties? The place is too empty - and it’s so boring over the summer, really you’d be doing us both a favor Evie, please?” She turns her head, batting her long eyelashes at me.

God, she’s pretty. Too pretty for her own good. But- “I don’t want to intrude - I wouldn’t know anyone but you, V. It’d be awkward.” I say. I really would rather not feel out of place for a whole summer when I could be eating delicious bodega sandwiches with my friends that I haven’t seen in a year.

“Please Evelyn?” She pleads again, this time using my full name. She only ever uses my full name when she really wants something. “It’s the perfect solution - you don’t have to stress about getting home, and I’ll finally have a friend to bring for the summer. I’ll have someone to talk to besides Felix and whatever poor soul he brings.”

“I can’t, V. It’s too last minute - I don’t want to intrude. I can’t.” I say.

She sighs, a long, drawn out thing that sinks into my chest and twists around my heart in that way that only she can do. My determination to go home falters. Would it be so bad to stay in England for the summer? I’m already here - it’s not like I’d have to fly (and fight with the airline). The whole point I came to study abroad at Cambridge was to experience English culture, and what better way to do it than to stay in a giant fuck-off castle for a few months? And she seems so… desperate, really. I’ve always sort of been able to tell that she’s never had many friends just by the way she acts - and how the other girls here act around her - and the way she talks about how her brother always brings someone home makes me think that she’s a little jealous.

“You’re sure it wouldn’t be too last minute?” I ask.

Her face lights up, and she turns around in her seat again. “Not at all - the guest bedrooms are always made up anyway, it wouldn’t even be an issue. And it would be such fun to have you there, Evie - Mum will be so excited that I’ve brought a friend home. And Farleigh will finally have another American to talk to - it’ll be great, promise!”

next part >

#saltburn #saltburn x reader #farleigh start #farleigh start x reader #farleigh start x oc

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selfaware-bungou-stray-dogs · 1 year

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Self-Aware! BSD. World-building. Reader's influence

Sort-of Self-Aware! BSD x GN! Reader

The more you read the manga, the stronger your presence in BSD world.

Names:

Little Light - shapeless blob of light. The "Avatar" of your emotions of some sort.

Our/Dear Guiding Light - how BSD characters call you.

Phase 1. Young moon.

Condition: Watch or Read BSD for the first time. Up to Cannibalism arc.

🐾 Characters are gaining self-awareness. The streets of Yokohama are empty. Night and day cycle are irregular.

🐾 In a "week" after gaining self-awareness, they start feeling your gaze on them.

🐾 During this phase, they can't feel your emotions. You can cry on sad moments till your throat hurts, or laugh so loud, that at least five streets heard you, but for characters you will remain as a gaze of an emotionless entity in the sky.

🐾 After mouth and half, the time resets.

End of phase 1.

________________________________

Phase 2. Blue moon

Condition: Read few LN and first manga arc.

LN and Arcs: Untold Origin, Fifteen, STORM BRINGER, Day I pick up Dazai, Dazai Osamu's entrance exam, The Port Mafia ark.

🐾 You are the voice, that characters hear from time to time. At first, your voice isn't sound clear and characters can't recognize some words. But, at one moment, character will hear you loud and clear.

🐾 Characters can feel your emotions. "Real" emotions. It means, if you are that happy, that you want to jump, like a little kid, they would feel, that you ere that happy.

🐾 Some characters can "see" your presence. A Blob of Light that is flying above them. But to see them, characters either have to spend a long time under Reader's influence (Dazai, Chuuya), or have sharp senses or ability, that let them be highly aware of their surroundings (Fukuzawa, Oda, Gide).

🐾 Only character, who are you talking about, can hear you, even if the second character is near the first. (Example, only Atsushi heard, that you were praising him for saving Kyouka, while Kyouka was standing near him).

Consequences: Armed Detective Agency and Port Mafia are creating an alliance to find a way to your world.

______________________

Phase 3 - Red moon

Condition: Read the manga

Arcs - The Guild Arc, The Guild Aftermath, Cannibalism arc, Perfect Crime arc, Gaiden

🐾 From time to time (during emotional moments for the characters) you can manifest as a figure of light.

🐾 Chains of the Plot becoming loose.

🐾 Characters now can simply be in the correct place, without a need to act. (Example, instead of fighting, Fitzgerald, Akutagawa and Atsushi were just having s conversation, regarding Guild joining ADA and PM efforts in finding a way to your world.)

🐾 Characters' actions doesn't change in manga or anime, so you won't think that something is wrong.

🐾 The Guild has joined the union. After the Cannibalism arc, Rats also joined. After Perfect Crime - Mushitarou and Gogol. The Government are looking, if there are more Self-Aware characters, but also can be considered a part of the group.

🐾 Most of the characters now see Little Light.

Consequence: No more plot chains. Characters can do anything they want.

_________________

Phase 4 — Purple moon

Condition - Read manga. (Optional: watch Season 4). Install BSD Mayoi Inu Kaikitan.

Arcs - Hunting Dogs and so on.

🐾 Hunting Dogs and rest of the DOA have joined.

🐾 Thanks to the BSD Mayoi characters gain access to your phone.

🐾 Instead of walking around correct places, characters, thanks to their connection to your phone, read the manga with you.

🐾 Look after you. Want to keep your safe.

#bungou stray dogs au #self-awareau #self-awarebsd

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academic-comeback · 26 days

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Week 1: Routines

Routines. Are. Everything. But they are also completely up to you. Establishing one can be difficult, but I have found is essential to a functional life. And it doesn't require a 7am wakeup every morning and falling asleep exactly at 11pm every night (those of us with insomnia, anxiety and others who just can't seem to switch their brains off will most definitely understand how difficult that can be), but it means keeping your life as organized as possible. College-era jobs are unpredictable. So is life. I personally work in food service, where schedules are variable and not entirely up to me. One day I could be opening and getting home at 4pm, while another day I'll get there at 4pm and close, working until 11pm depending on the job hours and who stays extra late just talking. What you do outside of the uncontrollable makes or breaks you. Routines, to me, are more about organizing the time you *do* have, no matter when that is. So in creating a schedule, you need to list your priorities, no matter what they may be. You also need to be able to be flexible, especially if you're working. Even if you're not working, staying strict in your routines can make life boring, and could lower the chances that you'll stick to them. Rigidness in the things you can control makes people like me not want to do them, so we should be open to changing *when* we get things done, as long as they get done within our set time frame. So, to create the routine. List priorities. Essential priorities while in college should probably include studying, keeping a tidy dorm or bedroom, hygiene, eating, classes, sleeping. Personal priorities might include hobbies, exercise, spending time with friends, calling home, or setting some alone time. My Current Priorities:

Keep room tidy

Take a shower before bed

Study during allotted times (Monday-Wednesday, 3hrs)

Read for at least 30 minutes a day

Ceramics on Thursday mornings

Get 8 hrs of sleep a night

So, my morning routine would look like waking up at my set time, and making my bed. I might go ahead and brush my teeth, style my hair, and make breakfast or lunch (depending on how hungry I am), before heading to ceramics if it happens to be a Thursday, or reading if not. Maybe I have work that morning and I'll get ready for that. At some point during this routine, you may want to look at your planner and figure out the rest of the day. What classes are you going to? What assignments are due? Do I have a space in between classes to study, complete assignments, eat, and decompress? A lot of this might already be planned out, and you might already have a great understanding of this routine. But if you get started in thinking about it, you might feel better prepared for the rest of the day, rather than forgetting that this club meeting is happening, you picked up a shift and need to head to work straight after class, the due date for this assignment got moved or this exam is in two weeks and I need to start studying today. Or whatever the case may be.

Night time routines, for me, are more about reflecting and decompressing. Once 11:59 hits and all of today's assignments are due, it's time to close the laptop and think about anything but. This is a good time to indulge in a relaxing hobby like crochet, reading, writing/journaling, or even simply watching an episode or two of your favorite show. It's a great time to wind down, perhaps take that shower if you're a night person, and slip into some comfy clothes. Maybe this is the time that you study some more, if you're a night owl, or maybe you're already asleep if you're an early bird. Personally, a shower is how I mainly decompress. It's where I reflect on my day while also taking care of myself. I'll blow-dry my hair if it's a wash day and head to bed. Sometimes I'll read, sometimes I'll watch a show, other days I'm too tired to think and will fall straight asleep. The big picture is to know yourself and routines that work best for you. If you get work done best at night, this is the time to be doing schoolwork and studying. Take mid-day to be your time to decompress and indulge in hobbies and other activities. Early-birds may prefer to get up early and indulge in these hobbies, studying, or anything else, and leave night time for whatever else. But also, learn to give yourself grace. You aren't going to die because you overslept one morning and missed half (or all) of your classes. Or because you got a late start to studying. Or because you spent a day or two not really doing anything. In my YouTube research of people who've made their academic comebacks, the baseline is that as long as they met their goals *most* of the time, they remained successful. Strict routines are not always going to fall into place. They make life boring, and keep you from being social sometimes, which is really important for your mental health, which is most important for your overall success. Sometimes, life even gets in the way and your gym time may be overrun by a friend's sports game or performance. Maybe someone's upset and you have to tend to that. Or, a dreaded exam is scheduled for the middle of the time you've scheduled for tuba practice. Maybe this means you can't go to the gym or practice that day. Or you'll have to leave social time for tomorrow. This is not the end of the world. You are still just as successful as you were yesterday when you checked everything off of your to-do list. The Bottom Line. Establish routines. Stick to them as best you can. Give yourself grace. You are human. Academic weapons are human. We are not robots. You. Will. Survive.

#academic recovery #academic comeback #academic validation #studyblr #study blog #study motivation #study community #university #student life #academics #student #studying #studying community

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ros3ybabes · 11 months

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Things I Currently Do For Better Health 🎀

Hi lovelies 💗

I try to live my life in alignment with my values, the biggest value being improved quality of life. I like to think I've included a lot of different things into my life to improve overall quality of health and life. So here's a list of things I do that help me with consistent improved health!

*I do not do these things every single day/every single week! Sometimes life happens, as I am a full time employee and a full time college student, so there are times I am too busy or too tired for some things. However, these are things I like to work really hard to consistently implement in my life <3

🩷 Mental (Intelect) Health -

Reading at least 1 chapter of a book, typically self help or productivity focused

Studying a 2nd language! Currently focusing on Japanese but contemplating adding in Spanish as a secondary focus

Consuming informative content! I love podcasts, and I really like watching Ted talks! And of course, the books I read tend to be more non-fiction, just from personal preference

Academics! Keeping up with my school work and academic life keeps me well informed. I'm always learning something new in my classes! I also personally enjoy studying, I lowkey love academic validation!

🩷 Mental (Emotional) Health -

Journaling! I try to follow a guided journal as often throughout the week as I can and I try to do some writing in my normal journal every so often, but honestly I've been a little too busy for journaling

Therapy! I know not everyone has access to a therapist, but I absolutely love being able to talk to a mental health professional at least once a week. My therapist has been the greatest help, especially as things have gotten more stressful in my life.

Rest! It's really important for me to have down time and not feel guilty about taking some rest time for myself. I always make sure I'm in a position to take rest without compromising school work or anything, but I try to have some time during the week where I can just lay in bed and do nothing for a while.

Meditation! This is one I'm still trying to implement, but I used to meditate for 5 to 10 minutes in the morning and it always gave me some mental clarity and ease of kind for the day. Definitely want to pick it back up!

Yoga! So good for mindfulness, finding stillness and relaxation, and overall ease of my being in general. It's like a super peaceful flowy version of stretching, and I'm adding this back into my routine slowly.

🩷 Physical Health -

Exercise! I try to get in movement daily. Some days that's lifting weights in the gym or doing some moderate cardio on the treadmill, and other days that means light cardio from everyday tasks or some mindful stretching and yoga to relax my body after a long day

Sleep! I try to get 6 to 8 hours a night at minimum otherwise I tend to over do the caffiene which only hurts me in the long run. Quality sleep is important for me, it helps me regulate my mood, my energy levels, and my appetite and cravings! The worse and less sleep I get, the crankier and hungrier I tend to be

Nutrition and Hydration! I do not believe in restricting foods, I believe in healthy moderation and healthy substitution. I try to eat a decent amount of protein and fiber, while not restricting or feeling guilt on days I eat a little higher fats or carbs. Balance is key! And water is so important!! It helps my skin, my energy, my hunger signals, everything!

Skincare!! I feel so amazing after a full skincare routine. My morning routine is simple for now, but there's nothing like a good skincare routine to make me feel my best and most confident.

🩷 Miscellaneous-

regular doctor appointments! eye exams, general physician checkups, mental health appointments, dental, all of it! you'll never know what aspect of your health needs some work if you don't keep an eye on it! I look forward to all my appointments as it always gives me insight into my health that I otherwise wouldn't know.

Balance! I work full time, 5 days a week. I go to classes in person 4 days a week plus two online classes for a total of almost 18 credit hours. I'm stressing about finances, insurance, future classes, and my current grades. Therefore, I make sure to find time for the gym, for my skincare routine, for my therapy appointments, and for quality sleep. If I let any aspect of my self care and health slide, I'd be a spiraling mess, and I can't afford to do that to myself, nor do I want to. I deserve self care and rest and good days, and I always like to play an active part in having a good day for myself! Balance is key!

That's all for now, lovelies. My greatest value in my personal life in regards to myself is a high quality of life and I want to ensure I get that! I love working on my health and taking care of myself. I love keeping myself healthy and happy and functioning. We all deserve good health, happiness, and positive days!

til next time, lovelies 💗

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mysecretlittlelibrary · 1 year

Text

Just Let Me Adore You Pt. 1

Pairing: Stucky x Reader

Word Count: 4.2k

Warnings: none here, we've just begun

Genre: mostly fluff ig

Summary: You’ve been dating your boyfriend, Bruce, for 3 absolutely blissful years. He’s a scientist and professor who is as smart as he is kind and if anyone asked, you were sure you’d spend the rest of your life with him. That is until two mysteriously charming men that Bruce swears are dangerous take an interest in you that threatens to turn your entire life upside down. I mean… what exactly are you supposed to do with two gorgeous men telling you something that suggests that basically everything you think you know is a lie? And why does part of you have enough doubt to wonder if they might be telling the truth?

Series Masterlist

***

It's a beautiful afternoon as you're wrapping up your shift at the cute little cafe/bookstore you work at.

"See ya later y/n!" Your coworker, a kid named Peter calls after you when you leave.

"See you! Have a good shift!" You wave at him with a smile. Peter's 18 and has only been working at the store for a couple of weeks, so far he's doing pretty well. Most of his shifts are in conjunction with yours and today's one of the first times he'll be working with some of the others. You trained him well so you know he'll be fine but it's kinda like leaving your kid somewhere for the first time. Your walk home is nice, late spring bringing warmer temperatures that aren't yet sweaty which you take advantage of. When you walk into your shared apartment, you find your boyfriend of three years sitting at your kitchen counter. Your boyfriend Bruce is a professor and researcher, and you moved in together almost a year ago.

"Hey y/n." He calls over his shoulder, papers scattered around him and his laptop.

"Hi Brucey. You done with lectures for the day?" You ask draping your arms over his shoulders and kissing his cheek.

"Yeah, I cancelled my second lecture for the day- they've got an exam next class." Bruce tells you.

"Ah I see. So how was your first lecture?"

"It was fine, it was my psych class and we ended up having some very interesting discussions. How was your day? You still training that guy?"

"You mean Peter right? His training is pretty much done, actually today he's working a different shift than me."

"Well how's it going for him?"

"I think he's doing alright honestly. He's a little nervous sometimes but it's kinda cute." You giggle.

"Cute, huh?"

"Yeah, the kid's a ball of nervous energy actually. Sometimes he talks like he's had too many espresso shots and it's so fast he's almost unintelligible but apparently he doesn't even drink coffee, which, I think might be for the best. It's so interesting though, I don't know many teenage boys who display energy that way." You hum.

"Maybe he's got anxiety or something."

"Hm, I hadn't considered that. He probably does." You muse grabbing a bottle of water from your fridge. "Well that's the uni update, anything interesting going on in the research area for you?"

"Oh, yeah we've got a vampire coming to the lab tomorrow actually."

"I'm not sure if I like that honestly." You hum.

"Not to worry sweetheart, it's safe. I won't even be alone with him." Bruce says.

"Right of course, not alone just- with others that are part of a vampire's diet."

"You know not all vampires feed on humans."

"What's the alternative? Animals?"

"Yes, exactly." He nods.

"And the vampire you're studying tomorrow eats animals?"

"Correct."

"And you're sure about that?" You ask.

"Well we're studying him because he's animal fed so I sure hope he is."

"Have you ever studied vampires that do eat humans?"

"Yes, back when I was a research assistant. Honestly, the hardest part about studying vampires is hunting them. Once they're caught you can sedate them and that makes it much easier."

"You hunted them?"

"I mean vampires aren't exactly jumping in line to volunteer for this kind of thing you know." Bruce shrugs.

"So this animal-fed vampire, did he volunteer?"

"Yes he did. I don't really run tests on unwilling participants these days. It's unethical."

"I know that. Sounds like your old research boss didn't feel the same." You say.

"Well, that group of researchers mostly tagged creatures to study their patterns in nature. They weren't so much running tests but it's a bit hard to tag a vampire that's trying to rip your heart out so-" Bruce shrugs.

"Alright well I'll take your word on of yours this vampire tomorrow. Be careful." You say.

"Always darling." He winks at you. In all honesty, you try not to ask too many questions about your boyfriend's research of supernatural creatures. He swears to you it's all ethical but you're not sure how well it sits with you. You've been to the lab once and the asylum-like observational rooms you saw were offputting. Stark white walls and a small bed in an otherwise empty room doesn't seem very morally sound to you despite what Bruce tells you. Granted the observational cells were empty when you visited so you can only hope nobody's been in there against their will.

"Y/n!" Bruce pulls you from your thoughts and your head snaps to his confused face.

"Sorry, I- spaced, did you say something?" You ask.

"I said I was thinking we'd order something for dinner, does that sound okay?" Bruce chuckles. You want so badly to trust that his work is virtuous because that's what he tells you.

"Yeah that's fine with me. Did you want Chinese or Thai or there's that Italian place too, maybe pizza?" You list off some options, shaking the uncertainty from your mind. They say ignorance is bliss.

"Do you have a preference?" He asks.

"Let's do Chinese."

"Sounds good. I'll finish grading these assignments and then order in a couple hours." Bruce says.

"Yeah that's fine." You nod giving Bruce a quick kiss and leaving him to his papers. With the few hours you have to spare until dinner, you crack open your latest read, a book recommended to you by a coworker that you've been meaning to start for a while. Eventually, Bruce orders dinner and gets your attention once the food arrives. Your night is pretty relaxed, you eat and chat while watching TV together for a while before you turn in for the night. You and Bruce do have different rooms because it's important to have your own space, but most nights you sleep together in his room. You'd consider your life pretty ordinary. You have routines and habits and while you have lots of fun experiences, you'd say most of your life is very much average.

~*~*~

The tinkling of the bell over the door doesn't pull your attention from the magazine you're reading but you do greet the customer since you're at the register by the door.

"Hi welcome in!" You say with mild cheeriness.

"Hiiii y/n!" The sing-song greeting comes from your best friend and you look up when you realize.

"Wanda! Hey love." You smile at her.

"Hi! Hi Peter!" She waves at Peter, who's learning how to work the coffee bar today.

"Oh. Hi miss Wanda!" He says with a shy wave.

"I've told you sweetie you don't have to call me miss." Wanda chuckles.

"Sorry." He mutters.

"What a cutie." Wanda hums.

"Isn't he?" You agree quietly. "Anyway, what brings you here babes?" You ask.

"Is your shift almost over? I wanted to hang out today."

"Well I'm supposed to be out of here in the next half hour or so but of course, I've gotta wait for Matt or Layla to come in before I can actually leave." You shrug.

"Peter! How good are you at that coffee bar?" Wanda calls across the store.

"Uh- I- I'm alright I think." Peter says.

"Wanna try making me a vanilla latte?" She asks.

"Well I- I can try."

"Confidence honey, you've got the recipes, you can do this. Don't act like the coffee bar's gonna bite ya!" You tell him.

"Right! Confidence. Vanilla latte coming up." Peter nods grabbing items to make Wanda's drink.

"And if you have any questions I'm right here!" You call.

"I'll wait for your shift to end and then can we do something together?" Wanda asks you.

"Of course we can." You nod.

"Done!" Peter says after a few minutes. Wanda takes the coffee from Peter and drops a five on the counter for him before sitting at a table with her drink and a magazine.

"This is pretty good for how unsure you were Peter." Wanda tells him.

"Good job Petey! I told you, you got it." You smile at him and again he hits you both with a shy smile.

"Thanks." He says quietly. A few customers come in and leave before Eric arrives and you clock out, leaving arm in arm with Wanda. She seems to have a destination in mind as you walk together.

"So where are we going lovely?" You ask her after a few minutes of her dragging you down city streets.

"Well I have a date tonight and I need something to wear, so the mall." She tells you.

"A date? You have a date? Why didn't you mention this before now?!" You blink at her.

"Honestly I forgot about it until I realized it was tonight." She shrugs.

"You forgot about it? Are you even interested in this person?" You laugh incredulously.

"I am! He's very sweet, I just have been busy with other things this week."

"Alright well let's get you something to wear for this second thought date." You snort.

"It wasn't a second thought. It's just that I can only prioritize like three things at a time."

"Seriously? You can lift a plane with your mind but can't remember your date until the day of?" You scoff. Wanda's a witch. It's the only real secret you keep from Bruce. She's not totally comfortable with him knowing that information and since it's her life you have no problem supporting that decision. To tell the truth, she's not very comfortable with him in general because of the whole research thing but he makes you happy so she gets along well enough for your sake.

"I didn't forget forget I was just, you know, too busy to think about it."

"Yeah sure whatever." You laugh as she pulls you into a store near the mall's entrance. "So how do you know this date of yours? Friend of a friend? Someone from work? A dating app? One of Pietro's friends?"

"He's a friend of a coworker." She tells you.

"A friend of a coworker? Is this a blind date?"

"No. He came to a work function and I had a nice enough time talking to him there that when he asked me on a date I said yes."

"It sounds like your coworker was setting you up and just played the long game." You chuckle.

"Hang on I'd like to circle back to your suggestion that it would be one of Pietro's friends. Why would I ever do that?!" She looks at you over a clothing rack.

"Oh come on Pietro's adorable." You laugh.

"This is about his friends, not him."

"Yeah I know but I'm of the belief that hot people hang with hot people so naturally-"

"Yeah that's not. No."

"Why? Is it the fact that the halfling has mostly vampire friends? I know you have ethical reservations about the whole blood sucking thing despite being raised by a vampire." You ask as the two of you leave the store you're in. Wanda and Pietro are twins but apparently since their father is a vampire and their mother is a witch one twin got each supernatural gene, making Pietro a vampire halfling.

"Most of Pietro's friends hunt animals so no it's not that." She rolls her eyes.

"Wait they hunt animals?" You blink.

"Yeah? So does Pietro, you know that."

"I know he does but I guess I didn't think about his friends- I think one of them might be volunteering for Bruce."

"What?" Wanda's eyes widen.

"A couple of weeks ago Bruce told me a vampire was going to the lab and they were going to study him because he's animal fed and well, considering we live in New York and not Idaho I can't imagine there's a large population of animal diet vampires." You explain.

"What if he finds out about Pietro? About me?" Wanda gasps as the two of you enter another store.

"He won't. Even if this guy knows Pietro why would he put another person on Bruce's watchlist that didn't ask to be there? His loyalty should be to other vampires not to a bunch of researchers." You say quietly. The shop you're in is empty besides the employees and while supernatural creatures aren't a secret, some people are more reserved when it comes to them.

"Some of them don't accept Pietro because of our parentage. He could rat him out on purpose for-"

"Bruce isn't going to go hunting people down, I've mentioned Pietro like once so he might not even know you're related, it's not like Pietro would rat on you, and if Bruce does find out that you're twins well, you aren't a vampire. I'll simply tell him that twins of a vampire and a nonvampire split the gene, and only one gets it. Plus it's been a couple of weeks since this happened, if the vampire had mentioned Pietro or Bruce had any suspicions about you, he'd have given himself away by now. He's not going to find out you're a witch. He's not going to find out Pietro is a halfling. Your secrets are safe."

"Man I hope so." She sighs.

"Yeah well I know so." You tell her. The two of you flip through racks of clothes for a while, pulling different items for Wanda to try on in the dressing room. "So where are you going with this guy?" You ask her when you finally reach the dressing rooms at the back.

"Dinner! Maybe something else after but we're starting with dinner." Wanda says through the door as she tries on the first dress she picked.

"Hm, what's his name?"

"Wes."

"Wes? Is it short for Wesley or- is that the whole name?"

"It's short for Wesley." She pushes back the dressing room curtain to show you the dress. "What do you think?"

"That's cute. Although maybe not right for a first date." You say. It's a short dark blue dress with lace trimming and as much as you like it, it's not a dinner date outfit.

"Yeah- maybe you're right." She looks at herself in the mirror for a moment and then closes the curtain.

"Hm, Wesley? That's not the worst name in the world." You hum.

"Y/n!" Wanda laughs.

"Look! I'm not trying to be mean, but you know, some names just don't... roll off the tongue the right way ya know." You shrug even though she can't see you.

"Now why would you say that?" She tries to scold you but you can hear her hiding her laughter before she shoves back the curtain again. "This one?" She asks. This dress is a green off-the-shoulder pick with bell sleeves.

"I think it's the wrong shade of green for you honestly." You tell her.

"Ya think so?" She hums and closes the curtain again.

"Anyway, I said it because it's true. Like I'm not saying you're going to fuck this guy or anything but imagine trying to moan a name like Bartholomew or Yolanda. Ya know? Wes or even Wesley you could probably get away with though."

"Don't be crude! I don't think anyone born in the last century is named Bartholomew but- I guess I get your point." Wanda chuckles.

"Also it's cute that your names are alliterative. Wanda and Wesley. You'll have to come up with some cute introduction when you meet people as a couple."

"It is one date. You are for sure skipping ahead." Wanda pulls back the curtain in a new dress, pointing an accusing finger at you. This one is a two-toned red and black dress.

"I mean if you think about it now you're ready for if the time comes." You shrug.

"You and your ability to romanticize things." She shakes her head. "Thoughts on this one?"

"Life is better when you romanticize things. Honestly, I think this is your dress. You should get this one. It's gorgeous on you. If he's not speechless when he sees you, leave." You tell her.

"That's dramatic." She laughs.

"It's in my nature." You shrug.

"It is a nice dress though. Should I bother trying the others?" She asks as she closes the curtain again to change back into her clothes.

"I mean if you want to but I'm pretty much sold on this one." You say.

"Excuse me." You hear a voice behind you that causes you to spin around. A sales associate for the store you're in is smiling at you when you do.

"Hi! Can I help you?" You ask.

"This is for you." She says holding out a shopping bag with the store's logo on it. Your hands fly up as if you're surrendering.

"I- didn't purchase anything so that cannot be right." You shake your head.

"Actually the items were purchased for you by someone. It's a gift."

"A gift from whom?" You frown in confusion.

"They've asked to remain anonymous."

"That- sounds increasingly suspicious. Um can you, hold the bag open for me?" You ask her.

"Excuse me?" Now she's confused.

"I am not touching that bag if I don't know what's inside it. So, if you could just open it so I can look inside?" You explain. "Wanda! You almost done in there?" You call as the associate opens the bag. Wanda rushes out of the dressing room when she hears your voice.

"Everything okay?" She asks you.

"Somebody has anonymously gifted me some items apparently." You share a look at her before looking into the bag to find a dress, a jacket, and a jewelry set each that you'd commented on while shopping with Wanda. You spin around to face Wanda almost too fast. "Holy shit it's all stuff I said I liked while we were shopping." You speak quickly and quietly to her.

"What?"

"It's the dress and the jacket that I put down right before we came to the dressing room." You hiss.

"Woah." Wanda blinks. You turn back to the associate.

"Did they pay with a card? Can you refund this person somehow? I can't just take this gift from a stranger." You tell her.

"All of the items they bought are final sale so unfortunately, a refund would not be possible, plus they paid in cash."

"So- there's really nothing I can do but take this?"

"I mean if you don't take it I'll simply sell them again. It'd be unfortunate for the purchaser." The associate tells you. You look at Wanda again.

"This is like a $200 purchase what the fuck?" You whisper to Wanda.

"Then I guess you should take it." Wanda whispers back. You mull it over in your head for a moment before turning back to face the associate.

"Alright fine. Thank you." You take the bag from the associate with a small smile. "If the, anonymous gifter returns please inform them that I appreciate the gesture but not to do it again because this is very weird." You tell her.

"I will pass on the message." She nods and walks away.

"I cannot believe you've got a secret admirer." Wanda loops her arm through yours and pulls you towards the counter with her chosen dress in hand.

"This is absolutely ridiculous. What do I tell Bruce?" You frown.

"The truth. That a stranger bought them and you have no idea who it is." She shrugs. The two of you check out and leave the store and subsequently the mall, Wanda deciding she has enough shoes to choose from at home. "Do you have any idea who it might be?"

"No. I only talk to like 5 people and none of them are spending $200 on items I only mentioned liking while we were just shopping."

"Even Bruce?"

"If Bruce did it, he wouldn't keep it a secret. So I know it's not him." You tell her.

"Well, you'll have to tell me how he reacts. I'm going to head home so I can prep for this date. I'll call you later." Wanda says hugging you tightly.

"Have fun babes." You kiss her cheek and then part ways, heading back to your apartment. When you unlock the door and kick off your shoes, the smell of food welcomes you so you head to the kitchen.

"Hi Bruce!" You say wrapping your arm around him from behind.

"Hi babe, welcome home. Work a longer shift at work or something?" Bruce asks.

"No Wanda came to my job and we went shopping once I got off. She's got a date tonight!" You tell him and Bruce turns enough to see the shopping bag sitting on the counter.

"I see you got some things too. What's in the bag?" Bruce asks.

"A dress, a jacket, and some jewelry."

"Impromptu mini shopping spree?" Bruce chuckles.

"Well I didn't buy any of that stuff actually." You shrug. Bruce frowns at you for a moment before turning back to whatever he's cooking. A past dish from the looks of it.

"Honey I know we don't really keep secrets from each other but if you're going to commit a crime-"

"I didn't steal them. Why is your first thought that I stole?" You chuckle.

"You said you didn't buy them."

"Yeah I didn't. They were gifted to me while I was shopping."

"What?"

"Someone bought these things and had a sales associate bring them to me."

"Who?"

"I don't know."

"You don't know? You didn't ask any questions?"

"I asked like a dozen questions, including if she could refund whoever it was that did this and she said no. She also told me whoever it was asked to remain anonymous, what was I supposed to do? Force the information out of her? She probably doesn't know who it is either."

"What if he was watching you? You accepted the gift he might think he has an in with you."

"How do you know that this person has any intention of doing that?"

"Can you think of any other reason that they'd spend hundreds on stuff for you? This is basically a secret admirer stunt y/n."

"Look I told the sales lady to let whoever it was know that this was incredibly inappropriate but it's too late to do anything else. Even if they're stalking me I have no idea who they are so, what do you want from me here?" You cross your arms.

"I don't mean to snap at you I'm just worried about your safety." Bruce pulls you to his chest.

"Yeah, I get that, but it sounds like you're blaming me for receiving an anonymous gift." You mutter.

"I'm not trying to blame you I promise. This is just weird and it concerns me."

"Honestly as weird as this situation is I dunno I just don't hear the alarm bells I usually notice before something goes wrong. Of course it's only one incident, things could escalate."

"Well, even if you don't feel alarmed by this, be careful anyway." Bruce kisses the top of your head.

"Always." You wink at him. The rest of your evening is quiet, you discuss work over dinner and watch TV before eventually getting ready for bed.

~*~*~

You hum along to the music playing in the store as you restock some items by the register, it's pretty slow around this time in the afternoon usually so you've got Peter in the back learning inventory stuff.

"Hi welcome in!" You call over your shoulder instinctively when the bell by the door goes off.

"Hey, excuse me." You turn around at the voice to see two men looking at you, one Black and one white.

"Hi! Is there something I can help you with?" You smile.

"Actually we're looking for someone. An employee, Peter Parker. Is he here?" The Black man asks you.

"Mind telling me what this is about?" You ask keeping a polite smile on your face although their question concerns you.

"Excuse me?" He blinks at you.

"Well Peter's a kid so I hope you can understand my reservations in disclosing information about him to men who haven't identified themselves or their relationship to him, and seemingly don't know his schedule which to me means he does not want you popping up at his place of employment unexpectedly." You cross your arms and the one who hasn't spoken quirks an eyebrow at you.

"Look is the kid here or not?"

"I'm not authorized to give out information you don't already have about anyone who may or may not work here." You tell them.

"This is ridiculous- Parker! It's Wilson and Barton come up here." The Black man calls loudly. You spin around and intercept Peter when you hear his footfalls behind you.

"Peter do you know these men?" You ask quietly. He looks over your shoulder.

"Yeah they're friends. I'm sorry if they're causing you trouble." Peter tells you nervously.

"They aren't causing me trouble but they're looking for you and I wanna make sure you aren't in any danger."

"No. No danger. It's alright, they're alright. Is it cool if I step out with them for a moment?"

"It's empty so fine but you probably shouldn't do this often."

"I swear this won't happen again."

"Go, make it quick." You wave towards the door and he leads the two men out of the store.

"She seems protective of you." Clint points out.

"She's real nice, it's kinda like having an older sister at work but that's besides the point you guys cannot just show up here while I'm working!" Peter tells them.

"That's cute, and relax you're just a cover, we were told to check on her." Sam says.

"She's wearing the jacket." Clint mutters.

"She's wearing the jacket! Did she mention anything to you Parker?" Sam looks from you to Peter.

"About her jacket? No? Why should she?" Peter frowns.

"No reason. The fact that she's wearing it bodes well for them I think." Sam says.

"Bodes well for who? Wait did they buy her that jacket?! She's been in a relationship for like three years!"

"Relax kid leave this to the adults." Sam nudges him.

"They can't just poach someone's girlfriend."

"No one's poaching anyone don't worry about it, Peter. Oh, but they do wanna see you after you get off so- head to the offices when your shift is over." Clint claps Peter on the back and then he and Sam leave.

"Sorry about that." Peter says as he rushes back in.

"Everything alright?" You ask.

"Yeah! Totally fine, I'm gonna go finish learning inventory."

"Holler if you need anything." You hum. You know it's not really any of your business but you do hope Peter was telling the truth and those guys weren't here to hassle him.

***

Part 1/???

Tagged Users: @cjand10

#marvel fanfiction #marvel #stucky fanfic #stucky x reader #stucky fluff #stucky smut #stucky #werewolf bucky barnes #werewolf steve rogers #werewolf au #stucky angst #Just Let Me Adore You #steve rogers x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes #steve rogers

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timetoletmyimaginationfly · 6 months

Text

Our Love Story

Nanami Kento x Reader

Part 4: Trust Me, Trust You

Chapter 1: Coffee And Baked Goods

Chapter 2: Sushi, Movie, And A Kiss

Chapter 3: Always Prepared For My Lady

(Song Inspiration: I Believe by The Jonas Brothers)

You heard the front door unlocked. You turned around from your computer and smiled to see Nanami enter inside.

It was only a week ago when he asked you to be his girlfriend. You remembered coming home from work and he was already there, a small breakfast made on the counter with a cup of hot herbal tea. His surprise woke you up from the tiredness, as if you had just woken up for the morning despite your all-nighter. He couldn’t help but kiss you nonstop, until he called you his girl. Officially.

When you looked at him, your head cocked to the side. Hair was messy unlike its usual perfect groomed self. His sleeves were already rolled up and his tie was wrapped around his hand.

“Kento-kun, are you okay?” you asked worriedly. Nanami looked up at you with a soft smile.

“I am,” he answered and walked up to you. He kissed you softly on the lips and looked over at your computer. “Busy semester?” You nodded.

“It’s my last one,” you replied.

“How’s your schedule like?”

“Lecture on Tuesday in the afternoon and my clinical day is on Thursday,” you answered. “They’re going to provide reviews that I have to attend. It’s all for the big exam to get my license after school.” Nanami took a seat next to you by the kitchen island.

“If you need anything, let me know, okay?” he offered as he held your hand. You smiled and nodded. “I mean it. You don’t have to do everything by yourself. Let me help you.”

“Okay, Kento-kun.” Your eyes then widened at the time. “I forgot I said I’d make dinner.” Nanami chuckled and stood up. He kissed your lips.

“I got it, sweetheart,” he said. “Focus on nursing stuff.” You shook your head and stood up from your seat. You pulled his wrist and sat him back down.

“No. You sit. You just came back from work,” you said and ran to the fridge to pick out the ingredients. He didn’t stop you, letting you spoil him with dinner tonight.

“Thank you, sweetheart,” he said. You smiled.

“You’re welcome.” He sat down in content, unwrapping his tie as he watched you cut the veggies and meat. You yawned while cutting the onions. And suddenly winced in pain. Nanami immediately stood up and walked over to you. “I’m so clumsy.” You put the knife down. Nanami turned the kitchen sink on and held your hand so your bleeding finger stayed under the running water.

“Now you sit down and rest,” he said. “I’ll finish up. Are you just cooking these all together?” You nodded. Once he bandaged your finger, he placed you by the couch and covered you with a blanket. He brought your laptop and placed it on your lap. “Now study.” You chuckled.

“Yes, sir.”

From the couch, you watched him cook. Your eyes never left him, admiring the man you get to call yours. You get to feel like the luckiest woman in the world. You got the chance to become friends with him and now he’s really yours.

“Stay over there, I’ll bring a bowl over for you.” You smiled and he smiled back. After dinner, he cleaned up after continuously and gently pushing you back on the couch. You pouted, feeling bad that he’s been doing all the work at your place after his shift.

“Kento-kun,” you called once he sat down next to you. He hummed softly in response, his eyes resting on you. “You really need to tell me what you do for a living. It’s eating me up and I don’t want to doubt you. I don’t want to fight over it in the future because I will argue with you.” You were sure of it and he took note of it. He nodded and sat back on the couch.

“If I tell you, you can’t tell anyone,” he said. “Absolutely no one.” Your heart raced at his serious and stern tone. Nonetheless, you nodded. “I choose to trust you too.” With that statement, you smiled. “But after I tell you, you have an option to stay or bail. And if you bail, I will respect that.”

“Kento-kun, are you like some gang leader?” you guessed. Nanami couldn’t help but laugh at your question. You pouted at his reaction. Nanami leaned in and kissed your forehead.

“No, I’m not a gang leader sweetheart.” You sat closer to him, your legs now resting on his lap. You held his hand and played with his fingers. He softly smiled. “I’m a sorcerer. In this world, there is cursed energy that comes from stress and negative emotions from humans. I have a vast amount of cursed energy where I can see cursed spirits. Kind of like ghosts.” He paused and looked at you. He watched you process the information as you stared blankly ahead of you. Once you looked at him, he continued again. “We work in secret for Japan. We even have our own schools to train new sorcerers.”

“And you did all that?” Nanami nodded.

“So that’s my job. I work for the government to save society from cursed spirits.” You nodded. Then you thought about why he gave an option to leave but it suddenly clicked. “It’s a risky job. I never planned to be in a romantic relationship until I decide to retire. However, as cheesy as it sounds, you changed that.”

“Psh, you wanting to be in a romantic relationship with a college student. Wait, how old are you? I am almost 22.”

“27.”

“So you did this for a while.”

“I actually recently returned. I worked as a salaryman.” You lightly chuckled.

“I can see that job suiting you more.” Nanami chuckled in return. “Must’ve been a crappy job.”

“It is but it did make good money.”

“Then why did you stop?” You were curious.

��My best friend was killed. My views changed but after helping this baker, I felt as if I had meaning to be a sorcerer again. So I called a friend and here I am.” You can see it was a topic he wouldn’t freely talk about. But you loved that he was open about it. “Sometimes I think they purposely put us against stronger cursed spirits. If it never happened…if I was stronger…” He paused, struggling to continue. His best friend’s death still triggering him.

“Kento-kun, you two were young,” you said. “You never would’ve known. It’s not your fault at all.” He looked at you softly, showing you his vulnerability. You wrapped your arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. “Thank you,” you said softly. Slowly, he wrapped his arms around your waist, bringing you on to his lap. You slowly pulled away and looked at him with a smile. “So do you guys have, like, powers too?” Nanami chuckled. For the rest of the evening, he talked about his technique and talked about his friends and their techniques. You sat there happily, as you were able to learn more about Nanami Kento.

#nanami x reader #nanami x you #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x you #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk #jjk x you #jjk x reader #nanami fluff #jujutsu kaisen fluff #jjk fluff #nanami jjk #jujutsu kaisen nanami #nanami kento #jujutsu nanami #jjk nanami #nanami fanfic #nanami #kento nanami

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maskthesimp · 1 year

Text

Jealousy Of A Stupor | Chapter 1

——————————————

Warnings: Jealousy, Sensory Overload, Sam and Saileach are both ghostfaces (sorta), there are more than 2, underage drinking (in the US), swearing, mixed signals but not in a way that's too uncomfortable or cringe inducing (yet), I think that's it lmk if I missed something.

word count: 5k

a/n: I did not proof read this, it’s well after 3am right now and I REALLY wanna get this out so if something goes wrong, I can correct it another time. Now, enjoy this very self indulgent fic. Because it is not a reader one, and uses my Self Insert as the main character. Kiss my ass, its fun. I reblog x reader stuff all the time, go support those writers <3 they do it better. There's also some fun details I added, including an Easter egg some scream fans who are also gamers may notice. Have fun!

[Outside The College - Third Person POV]

It was the end of the week, a sunny day, gleaming streaks of clouds streaming across the sky. The best kind of day to sit in the shade of a tree in front of college campus. The final bell rang out, signalling the end of this week’s classes as the students flooded out of the hallways, amongst them was a small, long black-haired figure swiftly shuffling through the open dam of students. Their feet clicking, stomping and scraping across the pavement leading from the front doors.

Down the pathway walked the figure, as the rest loomed over them, until they met a wooden table that sat a group of familiar faces. Chad, his twin sister Mindy, her girlfriend and new girl Anika, and other new guy Ethan, who sat opposite their close friend with freckles littering her face, a deep scar that decorated her hand in a crescent, Tara.

“Hi, Saileach!” A soft voice piped up from beside Mindy. The bright appearance and demeanour of the girl matched the voice.

“Hi, Anika!” They responded with a grin. They sat down on the opposite end of the bench to Tara, leaving a space for the one who had yet to show up. “That final exam was a motherfucker, wasn’t it? What a load of shite question 7 was, too.” They sat their bag down beside them on the concrete square amongst the grass that their table was bolted to, “What kind of torturer came up with that paper?”

“Jokes on you losers, I didn’t take a film studies course,” Chad teased, a hint of a smug smile creeping on his lips, while Saileach pulled out their phone to text someone, responding without glancing up from their screen.

“Ah, yes, because physical education and the study of frat parties is completely stressless,” the group turns their attention back to them, “fuckin eejit…” they tease, a playful grin growing on their own lips. “When are you gonna be here?” Saileach sends a text to their closest friend, jumping when they hear a matured voice coming from behind them.

“I am here,” Tara and Saileach immediately turn their attention behind them, seeing Tara’s older sister standing tall over the both of them, “You just weren’t paying attention,” The taller, and older, woman sends a knowing glance at the dwarf, raising an eyebrow with a subtle smirk that only her sister and closest friend would be able to notice. Sam didn’t go to their college, after all she was a fair number of years older than all of them, being 5 years older than her sister. However, since she couldn’t keep them safe inside the school, she opted to meet them outside of it every day instead, something that Saileach looked forward to every time.

“If by paying attention you mean having eyes on the back of my head, then uh, no. No I wasn’t,” They retort, patting the space between themselves and the younger Carpenter, allowing Sam to slip in and settle down herself. She had a habit of using her body to guard the two people she held closest. She refused to let anyone cause Saileach to make that pained, terrified expression they made when they saw Richie pining her to the floor of Stu Macher’s old house, or to let anyone’s knife carve her sister’s flesh while she wasn’t there again. The fear in their eyes reminding her too much of a child that was being stared down by their angry, drunken parent, and the sight of her sister vulnerable in a hospital bed causing her to lose sleep over the nights she wished she never left. But if she didn’t, she might not have met them. She gave a sneaking glance to the distracted person tucking their knees into themselves beside her, mentally smiling to herself.

“Wow, the snark is just radiating from the table today! I’m proud of you all, as the resident master in attitude, you make me glad to have you as students,” Mindy couldn’t help but stick herself into the conversation, even more so to give herself props, as she wraps an arm around her girlfriend’s waist. Not that surprising, and no one could really deny her title either.

“Well, its the end of the week, and we have one more day before we have two weeks off and have to come back to this hell hole,” Chad takes no time in changing the conversation, “I’m going to be partying and living off beer the whole time, what about you guys?” changing it so he can turn it into something alcohol related, of course. The rest of the group enters a collective sound of questioning hums. Ethan is the first to answer with a tut of dismissal.

“Not really anything-…” He tries to answer but is cut off by Chad.

“Wrong!” He says, patting Ethan’s back with a firm hand, “I am gonna get you laid, man. I swear to you, these next two weeks you and I will be drowning in women, got it?” The younger man can only stutter over his response, before caving and agreeing to join Chad on his two-week party plan. Mindy and Anika both agree to join them.

“You two gonna hop on the train as well?” Anika raises an eyebrow, gesturing a nod towards the two sandwiching Sam between them.

“Well…” Tara starts.

“No. Not a chance. Neither of you are going to some frat group’s house party, let alone multiple over two weeks!” Everyone turns to Sam, who answered for Tara before she could finish.

“What? You can’t stop me from having fun for two weeks, Sam!” Tara gestures angrily to Sam, then to her friends. Unlike Saileach, she wanted her sister to back off and stop being so protective.

“Sam, hey, I promise we’ll look after her, right guys?” The jock makes a promise to the older sister, after all, she knew how much he cared for Tara. But could she really let her beloved little sister off to some frat party with drunk idiots who would probably just forget their job two beers in? Her nerves are settled just a little bit when Saileach gently holds her sleeve, and suggests they have a smaller “practice party” tonight at her and Tara’s apartment.

“Look, I’m against anyone, especially Tara, going to any big drunken parties as you are, Sam,” They gently rest their palm on top of hers, “But we can’t stop her from going through life like everyone else, maybe this will prove Chad and Mindy can make sure she’s safe, yeah?” After a long pause and taking a deep breath, noticing the mild offence on Anika and Ethan’s face at Saileach not including them, eventually agreeing on the practice party.

The group eventually settles down, each heading back to their respective apartment complexes. Chad headed back with Ethan, Mindy and Anika stuck together as usual to go back to their apartment, Sam and Tara went back to join Quinn, who they predictably would probably end up walking in on yet another of her sex positive afternoons. Saileach meanwhile was the only one who didn’t live with a member of the group, because all the apartments were filled. Instead, they took the apartment just across from Sam and Tara’s, and stayed with a guy called Danny. Luckily, their apartment view had a clear sight into Sam and Tara’s kitchen, so they could rest easy knowing they weren’t too far away.

[In Sam And Tara’s Apartment]

As expected, when the sisters came home, Quinn was indeed having sex. Again. Everyone had been assigned a task for the night. Mindy was to choose the movie line up, Chad was to go out and buy the drinks, and Saileach & Tara were to team up and goo buy the snacks.

While Tara was getting ready to head out with Saileach to get the snacks, which everyone had personally made requests for, Sam decided to clean up the place a little bit and get comfortable before everyone got there. Quinn had said goodbye to that evening’s fun, and bumped into the taller brunette in the kitchen, washing some dishes.

“I am never bringing that one over again,” She groaned, leaning her elbows on the kitchen island. She had noticed Sam peeking out the window in intermittent glances, and when she got up to check for herself what the fuss was about, a hint of red had creeped its way across Sam’s cheeks. “Ooo,” She cooed, “Is someone staring at mister cute abs again?” Quinn had caught a peek at a set of arm muscles moving just barely out of view, trying in vain to get another peek for herself.

“Drop it, Quinn…” Sam countered, cutting off her roomie’s teasing before it could go further. She placed another clean dish in the drying rack.

“Aw, come on! He’s hot as all get out, and you clearly has a thing for you, too,” The red-head sauntered over to Sam, despite her glare she kept pressing the issue, “I’ve seen him peeking through the window as well~” She drew out that last part in a sing song.

“I said no, and you know why,” Sam’s tone was getting harsher, more blood rushing to her face and ears, “I’m not ready for something like that,” She pushed herself off the edge of the kitchen sink, “Now, if you’ll excuse me?” She turned to Quinn before walking off to get dressed, leaving her to take a few more cheeky looks out the window alone.

“Sam, I’m heading out!” Tara called out, in response to a frail knock on their apartment door. She opened it, peering down ahead of time, knowing who was waiting, “Hi, Sail,” She greeted the dwarf with a bright grin, “You ready to go?” She asked.

“I should be asking you,” They gestured to the apartment, brushing a strand of their pitch dark hair behind their ear, “I did come to your door after all.” They teased with a raised brow.

“Alright, smart ass, lets go,” She walks out, shouting in, “See you in a bit, Sam!” And shutting the door behind her.

“Be careful!” Her sister shouted back, but the door had shut on her before she could even finish her sentence, and the two were gone.

[At The Corner Store]

A bell dings above the glass door, which was framed by windows that granted a completely clear view to the shelves stocked with chocolate, crisps, nuts, and the fridges in the back that glowed with a dull, white light, illuminating the bubbly beers, sweet soft drinks and fizzy sodas that lined the shelves behind the glass.

“Good evening, Mr Hackett!” A soft voice called out, the small frame that belonged to it following suit with another fairly taller one as second one repeated what the first said, their dark hair melding together in the bodega owner’s peripheral, creating a blob of moving colours mixing in black, peach and white.

“Good evening, Saileach, good evening, Tara,” The older man didn’t look up from his news paper which he was staring at hard enough to damn near burn a hole through, his reading glasses resting comfortably on the bridge of his nose, “What brings you both here this late?” He asked, a hint of the tone of an old friend on the tip of his tongue.

“An absolute bender!” The smaller customer excitedly answered the familiar clerk, spinning on the heel of their thick, black boots to walk backwards, their hands casually in the pockets of their black zip up. Tara granted a smiling glance towards the banter the two were having, grabbing a bag from the rack to keep their bounty of food in.

“Do you mean a quote-unquote “bender” of a single night?” The middle-aged man teased, sending a sly smirk and a glance towards the exaggerated feign of shock on Saileach’s face, the creases on their skin bending and warping their dark lipstick and eyeliner.

“Aye, sure, sure,” They give a light-hearted response from their curled lips, before turning back to their shopping buddy to get ready for the night’s drink-filled activities. They followed the taller girl around, nabbing some snacks and tossing them into the bag. The two peacefully exchanged some small talk, until Tara asks a question that pulls the fun energy out of the conversation, for Saileach anyway.

“Has Sam seemed a bit…off to you?” She asked absentmindedly, glancing at the shelves.

“In what way?” They briefly pause in their tracks so as to not go too far ahead of Tara.

“As in, she seems kinda distant these days,” She turns her eye contact back down beside her, “I’ve seen her taking looks out the window with a smile on her face, I think she has a thing for that cute boy you live with, eh?” She giggles, “She always did have a thing for muscles.” She teased her sister behind her back about the pack of muscles she saw Sam staring at from the kitchen on numerous occasions.

“Does she?” Suddenly the tension in their muscles rose. The colour draining from their face, turning it more pale than their makeup was able to cover up, but just enough that Tara couldn’t notice between her half-second glances from them and the shelves.

“I think so, though I don’t blame her, if I was her I’d wanna get with that too.” She chuckled.

“Hm, interesting…” That was the last conscious sentence they made for the rest of the shopping trip. The only thing they could hear was the heated blood rushing in their ears, a cacophony of a nearby waterfall of blood in both their mind and under their skin, the bell ringing with each customer that went in and out of the glass which fragilely housed their mind, the shuffling of feet with the moving bags and the muffled sounds of Tara talking to them in the background, blissfully unaware of the grip Saileach had on their own palm, their knuckles turning a dead white, and their nails leaving crescent grooves into their own flesh under the safe disguise of their zip-up’s pockets. All they could do was run on auto-pilot, keep it to themselves by dissociating, and keeping up the mask of normalcy over the darkening of their eyes in hopes Tara wouldn’t notice their dead, ghostly appearance matching their droning, lifeless behaviour. They felt like all but a worming mound of disgust and anger wrapped in a poorly stitched together suit of human flesh. They swore they could feel the frame of their bones that kept them from collapsing into a gelatinous glob of immovable tissue and blood. The smell of everything reeked, making their stomach churn in a desperate effort to not chuck up them lunch they had earlier. They could feel the cold air of the nearby fridges ticking the hairs in their nose. They couldn’t take it anymore, they needed out. It was a death trap being in this small glass and brick cage, an asylum cell that could comfortably keep you alive for weeks or months on end but smelled, sounded and felt so terribly claustrophobic and rotten. Was that musk of decaying meat real, or just their heavy, manual breathing making them lightheaded? They couldn’t know for sure. Get me out. Out. Home. I want to go home. That was all they could think. It plagued their mind like the incessant buzzing of a blue-bottle or a song they just couldn’t escape no matter how many radio channels they cycled between. It was torture. It was suffocating. It was-

“That’ll be 24.95.” It was peaceful. The sound of a gentle bodega clerk, the repetitive pinging of the till as he swiped the snacks across the barcode scanner that gleamed with a red stain reflecting on his glasses. Tara making brief small talk with him was music on their sensitive ears.

“Thanks, Mr Hackett,” She said, taking the last of the snacks and returning them to the bag, slinging it over her curled fingers, “See you later, bye!”

“Cya, old man.” Saileach gave a light-hearted farewell to the man over the counter, giving him a fist bump which they could barely manage over the height of the damn thing.

“Don’t get into too much trouble, ya pair of gremlins!” He jokingly called out with a chuckle, as the two carried their bounty of food out into the darkening streets of the warmer than average winter evening.

“Ah,” Saileach gave a masked content sigh, taking in the flickering heat of the setting winter sun, “January embers, eh? Gotta love em!” They expressed their love for warm winter nights, despite the warning they gave of the degrading climate. The heat of summer being their worst nightmare, and the cold of winter turning their sensitive skin into a mass of exposed nerves that couldn’t bare to be touched by even the most delicate of hands, lest said hands wished to be departed from their length appendages.

“Stop quoting IT and lets go,” Damn it, Tara knew her horror, “the others are probably waiting for us at the apartment.” Tara gently grabbed at the Dwarf’s sleeve, and began dragging them down the road to their shared apartment complex.

“Correction, they’re probably waiting for the snacks at the apartment,” They followed the taller girl’s pull, “We’re just the delivery people that drop your pizza off before you tell em to eat shite and keep the change.” They joke with a chuckle, knowing their friends would never treat them that way, nor would they. They had all become something of a family over the past year or so. Their trauma fusing them all together like a fire that welded the metal of a shield piece to piece. They mentally gagged at that thought, knowing damn well if they said it to the group out loud they’d be ragged to hell and back. With love of course.

“Well this delivery girl lives in the apartment their using, and bought the food she’s delivering,” she boasted, gesturing to herself with the bag in her hand.

“What does that make me, then?” Saileach questioned trailing slightly behind the youngest Carpenter. If she was the delivery girl who were you in this metaphorical joke of a scenario that you yourself made up?

“The um…” The girl gave a tsk between her pondering pause, “other delivery person?”

“Slick, love,” You retort, “very slick.” The rest of the walk home was mostly silent, only broken up by mutterings of “go” when the lights signalled that it was okay to cross the busy New York streets. Saileach couldn’t help but think back to the store. Again. Their sickness took over again. This was the third time this month, and they’d only been getting worse. What was the common factor between the incidents? They knew it was jealousy. They were autistic, not stupid. Why, though? And over who? Each incident involved different people. First over their friends, in which Tara herself had to calm them down after Anika and Ethan had gotten involved with everyone. Ironically, after that it was Tara, that incident had been the worst. Until this evening. They mentally tossed it aside, letting it flow away for now like water off a duck’s back. Best not to dwell when tonight was going to be so fun! Right? Little did they know, Tara had been sneaking concerned glances the entire walk over since they had paid for the food. Whether they noticed it or not, she wasn’t sure, but them pausing for a full 5 seconds after she mentioned Sam’s feelings for Danny was kind of hard to miss. She decided to leave it for now, and let the fun of the night roll on.

[At Sam And Tara’s Apartment]

“We’re back!” Saileach chimed, taking the bag off of Tara’s hands and setting it on the coffee table in front of the couches and TV.

“Ayo! Welcome back, party animals!” Chad shouted across the room, quickly jogging over and wrapping an arm around the each of them, a beer in one of his hands. A big cheesy grin on his tipsy face.

“I assume you got the drinks then, big guy.” Saileach planted a supportive hand on the much taller guy’s chest, earning a mildly confused glare from a relaxed Sam, resting an arm over the couch and a beer in her hand too.

“That I did!” He cheered, “Let me get you one!”

“Cheers, that’d be grand,” They agreed, “No beer, though!”

“Welcome back,” she greeted them softly, “How’s Mr Hackett?” She asks, before turning her eyes back to Mindy who had gave a cheer when they came through the door, and had now left Anika’s side and gotten up to go choose the movie they’d start with.

“Uh, he’s good,” Saileach nods in response awkwardly sitting on the same couch she was, but giving her a few feet of space.

“Is that it..?” She turns her gaze to them, her fingers toying with the thread coming loose on the top of the couch.

“Mhm, why?” They got comfortable against the soft cushions resting against their back, Tara doing the same on the floor between the two. Chad came back in with a drink for Saileach and a beer for Tara. “Thanks, Chad.” They muttered, before turning their attention back to Sam.

“You’re not very chatty, you okay?” She asks, trying to hide the genuine worry on her face. The dwarf was usually much more upbeat, but when they came through the door it was like something was plaguing their mind. Did something happen between them leaving the apartment and coming back? It had only been about an hour, but a lot can happen in a few minutes, let alone a full hour, she supposed. Come to think of it, they didn’t see each other when Tara left. Were they this way before that? Did their roommate upset them? God help him if he did.

“I’m fine, just tired from the walk sure,” They just brushed off her concerns. Normally they’d share all their worries with Sam, so why not this? It made her feel as if she had done something wrong, but she wanted Tara’s first time drinking to be fun and not depressing, she owed her sister that much for always being on her back the past year, “I’ll feel better with a few drinks in me!” They chuckled with a soft grin. Fake. So so fake. She could tell.

“Okay!” Mindy shouted out, “Movie time!” She had got the perfect movie for the group to start the night with: A Nightmare On Elm Street. She put the movie on and everyone settled down with their drinks and preferred bowls of snacks.

“Aye, sure, a great movie franchise to watch through before you go to bed. Thanks, Mindy!” Saileach’s sarcasm was like a venom dripping from their accent, their playful smile holding the same effect as the tone of their voice, before they take another swig from their bottle.

“You’re just a coward who can’t handle classic horror, actually, little miss Elevated Horror.” The expert on spooky movies teased. In response, both Tara and Saileach spoke up with the same claim.

“It’s better!”

“Bullshit! Nothing beats the classics!” The night basically continues like this for a while, Tara and Saileach making jabs with Mindy and Ethan defending the classics. Playfully of course.

“Hey, uh, Sail could you quickly grab my phone from my bedroom?” Sam spoke up when the dwarf stood up to grab another bottle from the kitchen, “I think I left it on my bedside table.”

“Yeah, of course!” Their words mildly slurred, being decently far through the drinks and movies by this point. They were onto the third one now.

“Thanks.” Sam turns her attention back to the movie. They walk off down the hallway, reaching the older Carpenter’s door. Sam was usually strict on who could enter, Saileach was just an exception to her rule of “No one in my room unless you’re bleeding or dying.” She of course wasn’t entirely serious, but she liked her privacy. The two had a number of nights where they had slept in her room, usually because the smaller person had nightmares that gave them terrible insomnia, so she allowed it. They walked in, immediately seeing her phone on the beside table where she said it was. They crawled over the bed, reaching across to the wooden table to grab it. The sender down wood of the table was smooth, a turned off lamp resting on its corner. Saileach noticed the small drop pattern of blood that had decorated the wood from a bad cut Sam had gotten making dinner a number of weeks back. At that memory, their lips curl into a small smile, before they walk back in and toss her mobile device into her lap.

“Thanks, again.” She gave a quick smiling glance in appreciation.

“Yeah, no problem…” The last part of their sentence trailed off as they watched Sam open their messages, and the name Danny popped up. The poisonous reminder of the earlier events that night came back into their mind. That nagging feeling of something they cared so deeply about being taken away by another thing they cared about. A glance Sam had sent in the direction of you and Danny’s apartment with a smile on her face made Saileach feel sick. All they could think of was what he was saying to make her smile, while they sat opposite with a drink in their hand, stuck in their own head, and unable to process their own jealousy. Eventually they had enough, and swore to keep it out of their head, and just have fun. At that, they started downing their new bottle of alcohol, getting the attention of the whole room.

“Woah! Take it easy there, dude!” Mindy called out with a laugh. The energy in the room rose more and more over the next hour, the dwarf starting to get into off balanced territory. However, slowly the group started getting concerned. Tara, Sam and Anika most of all because the other three were either too distracted to notice the mess of a person growing in front of them, or they were too drunk. That last one mostly applying to Ethan. Though, eventually even they catch on. It’s clear that Saileach is a bit too drunk, and they start to communicate an agreement to take them to bed.

“Hey, slow down there, champ!” Chad speaks up with a laugh of his own, gently resting his large, warm hand on his friend’s shoulder. They weren’t the closest, but they still cared for each other. Knowing the headache they were gonna have to deal with in the morning, he finally asked them if they wanted to go to bed.

“Nnnnno…I’m fiineee *hic*,” Their soft voice slurred, “I promish!” Which was all they could get out before Tara dragged her small frame from the floor she had previously been resting on, wobbling slightly on her own feet, having taken two beers of her own.

“I’ll take them to bed,” She gently reached her arms out to take Saileach’s hands in her own, “C’mon, Sail, lets head to bed.” They yanked their hands away, going to take a triumphant swig.

“I. Am. Fineeee-,” they whined before they got cut off by Sam swiftly removing the glass from their weak grip, placing it on the table and wrapping her strong arms around their waist. Before anyone could react, least of all Saileach, they were tossed over her shoulder, embraced in her muscles and scent, her firm palms resting under their thighs, leaving them muttering into the crook of her neck in protest. The feeble attempts they made to wriggle free falling on deaf ears and a strong grip.

“Night, Saileach!” They all drew out in a sweet bid goodnight to the mumbling ball in Sam’s arms.

“Nooo!” They whined. A pained look of apology grew across Tara’s face with a somber smile.

“Stop wriggling!” Sam didn’t feel like carrying this tenacious drunken mess all the way to their own apartment, so she feigned reluctance in bringing them to her own bed. She dropped them onto the soft river of bed sheets messily, nearly falling over herself and landing on them, leaving their warm, flushed faces inches away from each other. A pout pursing on Saileach’s lips, their eyes finding it hard to not dart around the firm features of Sam’s face. Eyes, lips, skin creases, eyelashes, back again.

“You *hic*…” The two leaned slightly closer, warm breath ticking each other’s lips, “you shtole…my alcohol!” They pouted with a soft and empty glare. Sam immediately stood herself back up, rolling her eyes at the small frame barely taking up half the length of her bed.

“Why are you being so difficult tonight?” She reached into her drawers and pulled out a loose top, a tank top, and two pairs of shorts. Tossing the blankets over Saileach’s eyes, she very quickly changed into her night clothes, then started to help them changed into the loose top and pair of shorts she had grabbed. They eventually flopped back onto the bed when Sam had grabbed some water and practically forced it down their throat. After saying goodnight to the others, she turned her attention back to the bed in front of her, and climbed in.

“Fu- *hic* Danny…” They mutter under their breath, fading in and out of consciousness. Sam felt a familiar anger rising in her core. The heat in her stomach making her feel sick. Really? Now she had to compete with that? At this hour of all things? She was too tired to be angry at anyone. She could only gently reach over to the sleeping mess in their drunken stupor, brushing the soft, fluffy curls of their raven black hair from their flushed face. With a sigh, she sheltered the dwarf in her firm embrace.

“Goodnight, Sail…” She muttered under her breath, “I promise to look after you tomorrow.” The older Carpenter let her eyes flutter closed, drifting off into darkness herself.

#Sam carpenter x reader #oc fic #self insert #self ship #sam carpenter x y/n #reader is trans #has dwarfism #and is autistic #sam carpenter #self shipping #scream 6 #chad meeks martin #mindy meeks martin #ethan landry #anika kayoko #tara carpenter #ghostface!reader #ghostface!sam

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ky-yk · 1 year

Text

gaeul sunbae (kge x f!reader)

genre: gen? fuck if i know tbh || word count: 1.1k

author’s note: i’m not kidding btw this is not fluff neither is it angst, hope y’all enjoy nonetheless 🫶🫶

“how the hell did they do this…”

wednesdays were your least favorite day of the week for one reason only: your industrial arts class.

i mean, who’d enjoy getting drenched in their own sweat while trying to play around with rulers every week?

i’m not even gonna be an architect, why do i have to learn this? you thought to yourself as you were hunched over your armchair, trying to replicate what your seatmate had done before he triumphantly got up and walked to the teacher’s table for checking.

you erased your circle…thing for what felt like the millionth time, your eraser shavings and crumpled-up bond paper being the only thing you could show for yourself after almost an hour. you stared at it for a second before swiping the eraser shavings off from your desk (along with your insecurities) and hunched over, ready to try again before a shadow loomed over you.

everything passed by and all you could do was stare in awe at the girl who took one look at your paper, hummed, and pulled up a chair beside you to finish the job. you were frozen; not even processing how softly she took the compass from your hand.

you snapped back to reality just in time to see her finish your plate activity with a flick of her wrist. literally.

she took one more look at it and hummed before putting your compass down and getting up to fall in line and have her work checked.

you all but stared as she leans against the board nonchalantly, not knowing if and how you should thank her for saving your grades -- only for the five-minute warning bell to remind you that her effort would be fruitless if you didn't go up beside her to line up.

in a rush, you haphazardly grabbed your paper and rushed to take the spot beside her, leaning against the board alongside her. your eyes travelled the room, observing the whole scene.

soon enough, you met the gaze of your savior.

surprised, you broke eye contact and suddenly found the wooden flooring much more interesting — an amusing sight to said savior.

you mustered up the courage to thank her while she was close, but you must’ve missed how the line had been moving since the next thing you knew, she was walking away from the teacher’s desk.

“oh, i’m screwed…”

sitting at your assigned desk for your final exams, what was running through your mind wasn't the math formulas you had to memorize, no. instead, it was about how you could've -- should've -- reviewed your math lessons last night instead of napping the whole day.

what was that you kept saying, y/n? it’s all common sense?

noting the mini study group that formed behind you, you moved your chair closer to their circle, hoping that whatever they were talking about would stick around long enough to get you through the exam. you took a peak at the notes that were sprawled across the desk — and your future crumbling before your eyes.

you leaned back in your chair. just smile and laugh, folks, you thought as a defeated chuckle spilled out. you heaved out a deep sigh and looked up at the ceiling, resigning to your fate and deciding that napping would be a much better way to spend your time. you dragged your chair back to your seat and rested your head on your desk, ready to go off to dreamland before you felt a tap on your shoulder.

you let out a groan loud enough to make sure the perp was aware that you were not pleased by the interruption. with furrowed brows, you got up and looked around for whoever wanted to be on top of your kill list.

instead, you found a stack of well-organized notes on your desk; hope this helps - g.e, the sticky note on top read.

needless to say, that test was a piece of cake -- considering how you breezed through it with 30 minutes left to spare.

so did your savior, apparently.

when you turned your test over, you sat up and looked around at the rest of your classmates who were still hunched over and struggling through the test. all except one who met your gaze.

you gave her a small smile and nodded in acknowledgment. she returned the greeting before facing forward at the proctor's insistence, playing around with her pen to pass the time.

"what the hell?!"

a lot of things made you go, "what the hell?!" but you'd never "what the hell?!"-ed more than you had today.

the project that your pe teacher just sprung on you guys about making a dance routine, the fact that your friends ditched you to pair up with each other, and the sight of gaeul-sunbae approaching you--wait what?

"hey, you wanna pair up for this?" she asked casually. all you could do was stare at her dumbfoundedly.

and let out a single syllable.

"huh?"

"well, i just noticed that all your other friends paired up with each other, so why not?"

"i mean...i don't see why not?"

"okay, so i'll make the choreo and send you the video. just follow it, and then i'll edit the whole thing together. shouldn't take that long," she said with finality before walking off to the bleachers, leaving you to think about what the hell just happened.

wait, that's it? am i really going to get hard-carried by gaeul-sunbae for a whole project without talking to her at all?!

exasperated at the realization, you huffed and puffed your way across the gymnasium, eyes locked on your target while everyone else's eyes were locked on you. the whispers were as good as white noise to you because your ears were fuming with steam at your sunbae.

why?

you were about to find out as well.

"yah!"

surprised at the intrusion, gaeul looked up at you with wide eyes. "um, yes?"

"what the hell is your deal?! why do you keep helping me?"

she calmly stood up, making sure to avoid your flailing arms. "well--"

"does this stroke your ego or something?!"

"wait, what? that--"

"oh, of course it does! i'm like your damsel in distress, huh? well newsflash, sunbae," you emphasized the title by pointing at her chest so hard she sat back down, "i can help myself."

with an annoyed eye roll, gaeul stood back up, holding your wrists together and bringing them down, making your resolve falter.

"that's no way to treat your sunbae, is it? especially one who's been so nice to you," she scoffed.

under her scrutinizing gaze, you were left speechless.

"you're lucky you're cute. now close that pretty mouth of yours, would you? wouldn't want any flies flying in.

unless you need my help there, too?" she asked while gently holding your chin between her index finger and thumb, closing your mouth and making you look up at her.

with a tut, she tapped your chin one more time. "now, if you excuse me, i'll get working on our project."

#🐻 — ky writes #girl group imagines #ive #ive x reader #ive imagines #kim gaeul #gaeul x reader #ive gaeul

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