#I don't drink much soda these days

[boy-above]

i decided im gonna try to cut back on soda bc usually i drink two or three cans a day and that's too much, esp since i'm gaining weight and i have a very bad relationship with my weight so if i can stop that it would be beneficial for my brain health lol. i want to cut down to one can of soda a day, so i went out and got some flavored water instead also sparkling flavored water for when i want fizz. hopefully i can do it, i set it as one of my goals with my therapist so if i can do it i'll feel like such a big boy. so if you see me making posts like "i only had one can today!" i am congratulating myself.

[atlafan]

finding out u like sparkling water… et tu brute? 😟

LISTEN I don't drink soda anymore because it's too sweet and bothers my teeth, even when I drink the 0 sugar ones. Seltzer water just hits when I'm craving soda. There are so many flavors. When I'm parched, I crack open a lemon-lime seltzer and guzzle that shit down. It's so refreshing! Sometime I get cran-lime and I mix it with my alcohol. It's the same thing as carbonated flavored water, grow up! (still love you though, giving you a kiss on the forehead)

[fazcinatingblog]

First day back at work and I didn't drink anything till like 2pm or toilet go to till 5:02pm, I'm definitely 1000% turning into Colleen, I'm just all the over the place with a million half finished things on my desk and felt sharp pain in my arm and soreness increases like I haven't felt since two weeks ago and this is it, this is how I die.

[theskeletoninthegarden]

Every time I do One Extra Thing a week I end up feeling terrible and that just has to be more then stress talking

[silverselfshippingchaos]

yeah but. pizza dates with d.ante.

[cosmiicfairy]

.

[rabbitrah]

A continuation on my post about unloved foods, specifically this is my in-depth defense of root beer.

Root Beer isn't inherently gross, it's just one of those weird local flavors that's off-putting to people who didn't grow up with it. We all like different things and also we all tend to like flavors that are similar to what we grew up with. That's okay! But honestly root beer is pretty unique and, in my opinion, delicious.

One of the main complaints against root beer is that it tastes like medicine. Funnily enough, it was originally marketed as medicinal! This is true for most OG sodas actually. Pretty much as soon as carbonated water was invented, people were drinking it to soothe various ailments. A lot of the original soft drinks were actually invented by pharmacists. I just think that root beer is especially cool because the main flavor came from the root bark of sassafras, a common North American shrub. Because it's so widespread and aromatic, all parts of the sassafras plant have been used in food and medicine by many different Native American tribes throughout history and was subsequently picked up and used by European colonists. In the 1960s, some studies indicated that that safrole oil, which is produced by the plant, can cause liver damage. Whether or not this would actually remain true after it had been boiled and added to root beer is unclear, but it was really easy to replicate the flavor, so the sassafras in commercial root beer these days is artificial. Another fun fact about safrole is that it's a precursor in the synthesis of MDMA. None of this information has stopped my childhood habit of eating sassfras leaves right off the shrub whenever I walk past it on a hike. I'm like 85% sure it's safe and also mmmm yummy leafs go crunch.

Another root beer complaint is that it tastes like toothpaste. I think this is probably because another key flavor in most root beer recipes is wintergreen. I'm assuming that the people who think this are the same people who think mint chocolate chip ice cream tastes like toothpaste. I can understand and even respect that some people don't like mint and associate it only with brushing their teeth, but like. Mint is a pretty common flavor. I mean I think it's safe to say that humans have been eating mint flavored stuff for longer than toothpaste has existed... anyway!

Other common flavors in root beer (real or artificial) are caramel, vanilla, black cherry bark, sarsaparilla root, ginger, and many more! There's not one official recipe, and root beer enthusiasts often have strong opinions about different brands. Some root beer is sharper, with more strong aromatic flavors, and others are mild and creamier.

Another thing I think is cool about root beer is that it's foamier than most sodas. This was originally because sassafras is a natural surfactant (and why sassafras is also a common thickening agent in Louisiana Creole cooking.) These days, other plant starches or similar ingredients are added to keep the distinctive foam. Root beer foam > all other soft drink foams. That's why root beer floats kick more ass than like, coke floats.

If you've never had root beer before, imagine if a sweetened herbal tea was turned into a soda, because that's basically what it is. If your first response to that is a cringe, fair enough. That's why lots of people don't like it. If your first response to that is "interesting... I might actually like it, though" then I encourage you to track down a can of root beer today, hard as that might be outside the US and Canada. Next time you see an "ew, root beer tastes like medicine/tooth paste" take, know that there's a reason for that, but also the same could be said for literally any herbal or minty food/drink.

My final take on root beer is that it would be the soda of choice for gnomes. Thank you and good night.

[becomingthatgirl111]

organize your week like this to be closer to the best version of yourself

i interpret the process of becoming our best version as climbing a ladder, on each step, we learn something new that serves us, and the next we complement it with something new, and so on until we reach the end and after many small habits we have become that version we wanted to be. little by little we are learning and although sometimes it is complicated to climb because of the adversities that may arise we can always take up the path again and put into practice what we have learned. that said, today i want to share a method that i have created to organize our habits and thus fulfill them more effectively and feel motivated. in this post i will only present some examples, you have to apply it to your own situation and my recommendation is to start now even with small habits that will be the ones that will lead you to success. i recommend that you try it for this week and write down your results, if it has worked for you keep using this "organization method" and adding new habits or increasing its time.

organize by categories.

create groups to categorize the habits you want to implement in your life, for example like this (the habits are examples, use your own)

🌿 health (body and nutrition)

10 minutes of exercise every day

30 minutes of walking every day

drink a lot more water

start eating consciously

one self-care day a week, for example on friday. we can take this day more relaxed and take more care of ourselves, dedicate more time to our personal and mental care.

do massage with the quartz roller and gua sha

make an appointment for nails, hairdresser, spa, eyelashes or even go to a coffee shop with yourself.

use a face mask and hair mask

🌿 personal growth

read 10 pages a day

listen to personal growth podcasts or audiobooks (choose one and listen to it all week long)

choose an affirmation and write it down every day

record in a diary or an app your mood and what you did during the day.

create a to-do list of what you will do for the day (the night before)

choose a video of affirmations and listen to it every day at a time that suits you best

🌿 studies

study about what you are studying or training for.

dedicate e.g. 20-30 minutes each day to study or review.

study a new language, 15 minutes a day, 5 days a week.

🌿 hobbies

1 - 2 hours to what you enjoy doing (depends on the day and your schedule)

you can write down in a notebook the groups you want to choose for yourself and then the habits you are going to implement, even if they are very small, for example 5 minutes of daily exercise, that is a good start.

to stay focused and not fall into old habits we can also replace the old habits with new ones that we want to implement in this way.

old habit: too much time on instagram new habit: reading or listening to an audiobook while i take a walk. or even just 15 minutes of social media a day.

other examples:

drinking soda or alcoholic beverages > drinking a lot more water and starting to drink natural juices.

watch a lot of series on netflix (or any streaming platform) > read or listen to podcasts/audiobooks that nourish my mind.

overthinking, worrying > meditating for about 5 minutes

lying in bed without doing anything > organizing my room

think in negative > think about the things you would like to happen to you

other tips to connect with your best version

write in your diary how you would act, be and what habits your best version would have. this will give you clarity about what you want and you will feel closer to that because you will know how to act.

establish small habits to start with and take it as a kind of game or test during this week. don't push yourself too hard.

at times when you don't know how to act or react, think about how your best version would act and what it would do.

write down things you are proud of or would like to be proud of.

if you are easily distracted or do not know what to do at any given moment, set alarms to know what to do at that moment.

if you use social media a lot, set a limit of use.

choose habits that you know you will be able to do easily, that will make you gain confidence and little by little establish those habits in which you have procrastinated or which are more difficult for you.

think big, open yourself to the possibilities that life offers you every day and keep a positive attitude towards any situation.

apps i recommend: habit: it serves to keep track of your habits and also get organized, it's a kind of to-do list. daylio: you can record your mood, what you did during the day and your habits, it also allows you to write and add photos. it is very complete, it can be used as a digital diary. notion: to get organized.

duolingo: if you want to learn a language a few minutes a day will be enough. i learned a lot of grammar in english thanks to this, which works if you practice daily.

and as always my blog is about this and there will be many more related posts in addition to the existing ones, all to be our best version 🤍 in fact if you try it i would love to know your results.

[prettieinpink]

 ♡ PRETTIER HIERARCHY ♡

HAPPY 1.2k+ TO PRETTIEINPINK! Thank you guys for the support, here’s a lil gift from me to you. 

If you don’t want to read all of this, I created a hierarchy of everything you need to do to glow up, right at the end!!! But I recommend reading everything first <3

I’ve been trying to ‘glow up’ like forever, but there was no actual content out there that helped me glow up. Most people sugarcoated, or their lifestyles of glowing up just weren't sustainable for me. So, I created this post for everyone planning to glow up or maximise their prettiness! 

DISCLAIMER – THIS POST IS NOT DETAILED. I wanted to do a simple outline to give you guys an idea of what to do to maximise your pretty. A little help to plan, especially as we enter 2024, but I’ll expand on these individual topics in the future. 

GRADE 1 – HEALTH

Being healthy can make you SO pretty. Being healthy is the foundation. There are other ways to be physically healthy, but after doing these 4 the rest usually fall in place.  Here are some simple ways to become healthier, and then eventually prettier!

HEALTHY EATING.

 I'm not going to go super deep into this, as no diet fits everyone + Please consult with your doctor before taking any extreme advice. Though, I'll tell you a bit of things that helped me !!

Stop drinking soda. Please, it's so unhealthy and it's full of so many sugars. Even the ones that are 0 cal, have weird chemicals that I don't trust. Many more alternatives taste just as good, like coconut water, herbal drinks, smoothies etc! Especially because nowadays most large calories and sugar intakes are from sugary drinks 

Stop restricting, moderate it. I am a big fan of dairy, yoghurt, milk, and cheese, I love it all. However I acknowledge that dairy isn’t the healthiest, so instead I always ensure I'm eating in moderation. E.g I put a tablespoon of shredded cheese in my omelettes instead of a handful. You will enjoy healthy eating so much, but only if you're not restricting. 

Have one serving of fruit, vegetables, or both with each meal. It provides so many good nutrients, makes you fuller and keeps you hydrated. Measure with your palm to ensure you’re eating enough. 

Know that just because one food has fewer calories than the other, does not mean it is the healthiest. I struggled so much with this, especially because many weight loss accounts will mention this, but it is so wrong. White bread has fewer calories than brown bread, but brown bread is higher in nutritional value. 

Plan snacks. Planning snacks for throughout the day, instead of spontaneously eating is so much better. I recommend this for anyone who gets hungry during the day but not enough for a meal (like me!)

Drink more water. Not 1L a day, because it is so much more ideal for you to have a glass of water with each meal + when you feel thirsty. 

Start educating yourself. This is as much as I can tell you, im not a nutritionist or a dietitian but if you plan to ensure that healthy eating becomes your lifestyle, educating yourself is essential!! 

EXERCISING.

Once again, I'm only going to go surface level with this because it is only based on my personal experience + Consult with your doctor before doing anything extreme. 

Start aiming for 5k+ steps. I see a lot of people advertise 10k+ steps as the standard, or what's active, but it's not sustainable If you're a busy person with a sedentary life or a beginner at exercise it is gonna be hard to sustain that. But walking is so good for you and simple too.

Join your local sports! Such a fun way to socialise while still exerting energy. 

If you can't do that for whatever reason, there are many ways to exercise at home. Research and pick a workout that you like and is sustainable. E.g. jump rope, pilates, home exercises, weightlifting, biking

Start standing more, it exerts energy. While very little, it still is very good. 

That's it, but remember to always start small with exercising, and RESEARCH!

BETTER SLEEP

To me, it doesn’t matter how much sleep a person is getting, but much more rather the quality of said sleep. So, here are some tricks and tips to get better at sleeping!!

Investing in a good quality pillow is so good for your sleep, the more comfortable you are, the better + it reduces the chances of poor posture or hump necks 

Research about different sleeping positions, as some positions at night promote back pain, difficulty breathing or poor posture. 

Start sleeping in complete darkness. Remove all sources of light or invest in good light-blocking curtains OR binders. Though, binders seem to be much more effective but are more pricey. If you cannot do either of that, buy a good sleeping mask. 

Sleep in the cold. Your body easily falls asleep if your environment is cold, and you’re less likely to wake up in the middle of the night. 

It is ideal for you to stop using devices an hour or two before bed, but if it is not sustainable for you, wear red blue-light-blocking glasses instead of clear ones. Red ones are more effective. 

Avoid large physical or mental tasks before bed, use that time to unwind and tell your body it's time to go to sleep. 

Avoid napping for longer than 30 minutes, or it can disrupt the sleep you have at night. 

Go to sleep at similar times every day. If you go to sleep earlier or later than this, you will ruin your sleep schedule and feel groggy. 

I expand more here. 

ORAL HEALTH

This is a step many people will neglect, but the most important in my opinion. Your teeth are the only body part that fails to regenerate after a certain age. Here's how I take care of mine!

Brush your teeth for longer. Brushing your teeth should not be a sped-up process, put actual thought into it. 

Start flossing. Floss removes plaque, and reduces the chances of your teeth yellowing! Do this ideally after each meal.

Brush your teeth before you eat. Brushing my teeth is the first thing I do when I wake up because brushing your teeth is supposed to protect your teeth from the food, not wash away your food. 

If you have the means, buy an electric toothbrush, as this gets in the little nooks and crannies that a regular one cannot. 

Use a tongue scraper or your toothbrush to get rid of any bacteria on your tongue. 

Use straws to drink coffee or any heavily coloured drinks. This avoids the premature yellowing of teeth. Make sure you put the straw on the side of your mouth to avoid your teeth. 

Use good mouthwash. A total game-changer, makes your breath fresher and your gums healthier. 

If need be, definitely use a purple teeth serum as a whitening treatment.

GRADE 2: STYLE 

I do not mean literal clothes and style, that's in grade 3. This is all about basic grooming and such. This is 2nd most important, especially if you're somebody who’s never been invested in beauty.

SKINCARE 

Get a basic skincare routine, cleanser and moisturiser.

If you have other skincare concerns e.g. dry skin, hyperpigmentation, acne, or blemishes, invest in a serum. 

Avoid touching your face frequently.

Wash makeup brushes & pillowcases often.

Dermaplaning to help skincare absorb better. 

Use sunscreen!

HAIRCARE

 Invest in a good shampoo and conditioner for your hair type.

Use a good hair oil, it doesn’t have to be for growth, but just for nourishing your scalp

Sleep with a good quality bonnet on.

Find which type of hairbrush works the best on you!

Use warm water to remove product build up and dirt, but use cool water to rinse.

Buy spray suncsreen to put on your scalp during hot weather.

Once again, research. Hair is just too much of a broad topic for me to thoroughly talk about.

EYEBROW & LASHES

Trim your eyebrows regularly to avoid too many stray hairs

Tint your eyebrows and lashes. If you already have dark eyelashes and brows, try a lighter look. I seem to prefer a dark brown look to a black 

Invest in a good lash & brow serum or use any oil

Don't use Vaseline on your eyelashes.

 Limit how much you wear mascara. 

I talk more about this here. 

BODY & HANDS 

Have a daily shower routine which consists of washing, exfoliating and moisturising your skin. 

Using scented products is such a game changer, smelling good is like being a magnet 

Doing manicures, my routine is a cuticle scrub, file, buff, polish, paint then cuticle oil. 

Shave on the areas you want to. Having smooth skin is nice, but to ensure your shave lasts longer, watch a video. 

I post about creating a good shower routine here. 

LIPS

Invest in a good, portable lip balm. I prefer the ones that burn your lips to give it a more fuller effect

Make your lip scrub. Sugar, honey and turmeric are my go-to. Helps remove dead skin.

If you have hyperpigmentation around the lips, use glycolic acid, only a little.

GRADE 3 – FASHION

My favourite grade, because it is so fun and focuses more on the aesthetic side of things. However, they're not essential, which makes it all the more fun!

CLOTHES 

 I have a post about wardrobe essentials here. 

Find out about what season colours you are. This helps with using colours in fashion to enhance. ( if you don't like your colours it is okay, it doesn’t change much if you do not wear them) 

Figuring out your undertone colours for jewellery. 

Figure out what works for your figure. Experiment with necklines, bottom length etc. 

Find out your general style too, what you feel confident in and more assured. 

MAKEUP

Research and only watch tutorials of women who look like you (trust me). 

Dear Peachie has a bunch of videos of how makeup works, for beginners to more advanced artists!

Then make your signature look for every using your knowledge. 

FRAGRANCE 

Invest in a good eau de parfum and eau de toilette. Cheap fragrances suck. 

Invest in a good-scented lotion. My favourite brand is Vaseline.

Using a good nice fabric softener for laundry makes you feel and smell fresh

Using an expensive scented body wash doesn’t matter, invest in a good body lotion. 

HAIR STYLING 

Hairstyles that enhance your face shape, not shield it. 

Having a simple signature look for everyday

Experimenting with your hair is ideal, but if you can't for whatever reason once again research.

GRADE 4 – PERSONALITY

The way you seem to others can make you so much prettier. Fake it till you make it as always~

POSTURE

Having good posture makes you stand out, makes you look prettier and is generally good for your health

Chin is parallel to the floor, shoulders are down and relaxed, rib cage is elevated, pelvis is tucked in, your knees straight and flexed, and the weight on your feet should be in the center.

You can stretch for good posture, there are many videos on this on YouTube.

Ensure your sleeping position is promoting good posture, not poor. 

Buy a back brace to reinforce good posture.

BODY LANGUAGE

Learn how to move your body during conversations to seem more self-respected and confident.

Train your facial expressions for different situations, but especially for taking photos.

There are tons of books and videos on this, won’t expand because this is all about how you want others to perceive you. 

ELOQUENCE

Improve the way you communicate with others. Be fluent and clear to understand 

Expand your vocabulary, know how to substitute words on the spot and make sentences. 

Knowing what to say in like any and every conversation makes people like you more, and the best way to be more eloquent is just practice. 

There are so many good books about this.. read.

GRADE 5 – MIND

Personally, having a good mindset does boost your self-perception of your prettiness + being happier in general makes you more inclined to take care of yourself = being more pretty!!!

MENTAL HEALTH

Start journaling as a way to organise your thoughts and to truly analyse your emotions. There are a lot of journaling prompts on Pinterest and such!

Meditation as a way to clear the mind when needed is so good. There are a bunch more meditations for other purposes though like body image, productivity, focus or just general relaxation.

Go to therapy, or just have at least one person you can talk to when life becomes tough.

Cut back on social media. There's misinformation, trolls and a lot of content that isn't nourishing your mind. 

Get some sun! Simple and doable, but has a huge effect on the body. It can improve the current mood. Wear sunscreen. 

Start learning how to process situations, instead of bypassing the emotions that come with them. 

Start surrounding yourself with like-minded people. Seriously, being around people who are just too different is draining. 

MINDSET

Embrace growth and reject all forms of comfort. Being uncomfortable with something is growth. 

Don’t do things because you ‘have’ to do this, do them because they benefit you and see it in that way. E.g ‘I’m going to clean my room because I deserve a clean place to rest and work’ instead of ‘I have to clean my room’

Become detached. Stop letting everything that happens in your life affect you, start observing instead of consuming. 

Self validates yourself. Tam Kaur did a wonderful video on this that I think everyone should watch.

Stop believing that everything and everyone is out to get you. Your subconscious mind believes this, do not feed it, starve it.

There's a lot to say about mindset, but I recommend watching some mindset YouTubers who explain everything in depth.

and now,,,, here's a ANOTHER gift from lanny because u read her post. And liked it. And reblogged it. And followed her.. pleaseee

[blackhairedjjun]

thoughts on food truck chef!yeonjun x office worker!reader

meet cute, gn!reader, warnings for food and overwork

unfortunately one day, you forget to bring the lunch you packed to work. fortunately, a new food truck selling burgers and fries has decided to park a few blocks away from your office building.

at first you don't think much of it: you stand in line with a few other employees in front of you, then a gruff middle-aged man takes your order, then you wait for a few minutes for your burger to be grilled. when your name is called, however, your order is served not by the same gruff man but by a handsome young man about your age. he smiles at you when he hands over the wrapped burger and you suddenly feel dizzy from the way he looks at you.

it soon becomes routine for you to visit the food truck during your lunch break at least once a week - maybe you order a burger because you "forgot" your lunch at home, or maybe you just order some fries or a drink to go with the food you already have. the cute cook always smiles and chats with the customers, including you; he asks about your day, if you enjoyed your last order with him, how you spent your last weekend. even if you've ordered nothing more than a soda, he still takes the time to talk to you.

and when you ask him how his weekend was and how his day's been going, he breaks out into shy laughter, his ears turning pink.

you learn that his name is yeonjun, that he lives in the same apartment building as his four closest friends, and that he likes to take photos or do dance covers when he isn't busy with his job at the food truck. he starts peppering his conversations with little flirtations, each one making your heart flutter, but you tell yourself that it's nothing. he likes being cheeky with all his customers.

one night you find yourself going home late after an incredibly long overtime shift. you have a client who wants a rush project, and that means more hours at your desk; the first step outside your office building feels like entering paradise. you don't expect anyone else to be out as late as you, yet when you pass by the food truck you find yeonjun all by himself locking it shut.

he overslept and arrived past the lunch rush hour, he explains, and to make up for it his boss made him clean up by himself.

he's headed to the same train station as you and is even taking the same line, just with a different stop, so the two of you head home together. he tells you that he overslept because he stayed up editing a video of his dance covers, a little passion project of his. you rant to him about your new client and he frowns, worrying that you're working yourself to the bone. "you're too precious to be stressing out over a client who doesn't really care," he says.

you turn away from him so that he doesn't see you blush.

on the train home he shows you a draft of his dance cover video on his phone. you've never seen this side of yeonjun before: he is completely in his element, moving perfectly with the music, expressing just how he feels with his body. you gasp and shower him with compliments, and all he can do is let out nervous giggles and mumble shy "thank you"s. you love this side of him and you wish that you could see it more.

his stop is before yours, and before he gets off he looks at you then opens his mouth. nothing comes out. he closes his mouth then opens it again, then croaks out: "can i... have your number?"

you heartbeat is ringing in your ears as you exchange phones and type in your contact details, but you're smiling so much that you can feel your cheeks ache. "text me when you get home," you say, your voice just as shaky.

"i will," he says just as train pulls in at his stop. "you too, okay?"

"okay. take care, yeonjun."

"good night."

he takes one last look at you before he exits the train, his ears still red. you watch his figure as he goes, then press your hands to your cheeks as if to stop yourself from blushing so much.

let this be only the beginning, your heart tells you.

omg i don't know what came over me... the clips of burger cook!yeonjun from the concept trailer took over my mind he looked soooo good lksdjfklsjf i just had to write sth about it so i wrote all of this in one go. maybe if i have the energy i'll turn this into a proper fic...? idk

[norrisleclercf1]

I need angsty sebcharles where reader is having a panic attack because she had a week from hell that just exploded like a volcano and she can’t get ahold of them to calm her down. So they basically find her losing her shit in their home.

(Totally not base off my own life)

Love everything you do!!

- 🐮

A/N: Aight getting personnal here and it's finals week so yeah

You couldn't handle it anymore. You couldn't sit for hours on end reading garbled words trying to make sense of them. You were tired beyond what was considered to be normal. Drinking way to many sodas and energy drinks for the shaking to just be tiredness.

You tried to blame the restlessness on the energy drinks you've been chugging all day but you knew you couldn't keep up that excuse. Wanting nothing more than to close your books, you feel your chest tighten and your vision narrow. "Not good," You whisper and start looking around the papers and books for your phone.

You needed to call one of them, you didn't matter who, you just needed one of them to talk you down. Finding it, you shake heavily and hit Sebastian's caller ID praying he picks up.

"Pick up, please, Sebby, I need you." You whimper out, trying hard to keep yourself from breaking down. You were fighting a losing battle with your head and you needed his calm voice to talk you down, you needed Charles's soft french as he reminds you that everything is going to be okay. "Sebby, pick up." You choke on a sob trying your best to control the tears that were no falling down your face.

"You have reached the automated voicemail of-" You don't wait for it to finish before your hitting end and calling Charles. Maybe Sebastian turned his phone off again, he does get annoyed sometimes with it always going off. "Charlie, I need you." You sob out digging your head between your legs trying to do your soothing techniques your therapist taught you.

Yet again you get the same monotone robot voice before you throw the phone and hiccup, letting the sob rack your body. Standing up you start to pace the living room, pulling at your hair as you cry the world spinning. Why weren't they picking up? Did they not love you anymore? Have they realized you're not right for them? Why aren't they here? Why?

Your mind runs wild as your body racks out a loud sob and you drop to the floor as your body starts to go into survival mode. Your vision darkening.

----------------

"Think she'll like them?" Charles asks, nervous as he holds the little gifts and bouquet of flowers. They knew you have been studying hard and they wanted to surprise you. "Yes, Charlie, stop asking." Sebastian laughs as they push open the garage door and are slow to walk in, not wanting to alert you.

Stepping farther into the house, Sebastian stops when he hears a gut wrenching sound coming from the living room. "Y/n," Charles gasps, dropping everything as he rushes to you, Sebastian quick on his heels. "Oh god, baby." Charles is frantic seeing the state you're in.

"Fuck," Sebastian collapses beside his boyfriend as Charles wraps his arms around you. "Don't leave me," You sob, Charles and Sebastian share a look. You rarely had your episodes, but when you did they were never good and they tried to be there.

"Why didn't you answer," You whimper into Charles chest as Sebastian grabs your hand and does a pressure point to help you calm down. "We're sorry, fuck we're so sorry. We were getting to a gift and fuck we're so sorry." Charles whispers, rocking back and forth a little with you, which has you slowing your breathing.

"We're never leaving you, you know that yeah?" Sebastian asks, moving closer and you nod your head slowly. "It just got to much." You whimper and Sebastian nods. "I'm so sorry we weren't here. But, we're here now." Sebastian whispers, pulling you both into him.

"We're not going anywhere."

[lovingmattysposts]

Dreamin' About It 2

P1

summary: Matt and you never got along. He always teased you about everything you did, so much so you decide to you wanted to lose your virginity just so he would shut about it. The only issues was you didn't know who to lose it to and that you were scared out of your mind to do it

warning: smutttt, cursing

hehe heres part 2

merry christmas eve i love all of you

xoxo autumn

That's when the door ripped open. Evan stopped kissing me and we both turned our heads and he was ripped off of me.

"Okay get off her"

I sat up pulled down my skirt seeing Matt gripping Evan's shirt. "Matt" I said with wide eyes. Matt let him go roughly. "Dude what the fuck?" Evan yelled at him. Matt glared at him.

"She's drunk" He said motioning to me. I just watched them. Evan walked up to him. "Stop making it into something it's not. We were just fine" Evan glared at him. Matt looked over at me, while looked at him with a nervous expression.

Matt looked back at him, pushing his chest. "Get out" He said walking up to him. Evan glared over at him. "Should have known you wouldn't do anything" he shook his head at me. I felt his words in my chest as he turned and left slamming the door, his words ringing through my head.

I swallowed looking up at Matt. I glared standing up off the bed. "Matt what the fuck?" I yelled at him. He shook his head. "You knew it was a bad idea. You should be thanking me" He said stepping up to me.

"Thanking you? Matt you just embarrassed this shit out of me!" I said shaking my head at him. He clenched his jaw staring down at me. "You're drunk and we're leaving let's go" He mumbled walking past me. I grabbed his arm.

"No!" I yelled. "Why are you such a dick to me? Do you just want to hang the virgin card over my head for the rest of my life?" I asked shaking my head. He let out a breath.

"I wasn't letting you sleep with him of all people, if you want to talk about bodies--" He said shaking his head. I pushed him. "You're not my boyfriend Matt. I can sleep with whoever I want to and you don't get a say" I shook my head. He nodded.

"Sorry, You wanted to sleep with him? He made you feel comfortable? Upstairs at a fucking party is where you wanted to lose your v-card?" He asked shaking his head motioning towards the door.

I clenched my jaw. "It wasn't your decison to make" I said with a clench jaw. He scoffed. "The guy's ego's so big he probably doesn't even know how to use his dick" He spat. I shook my head.

"And you know how to use yours?" I spat. "Yeah. I do" He said towering over me. I just blinked at him as he looked down at me. He let out a breath looking away.

I grabbed his arm pulling him towards me before pressing my lips to his. He kissed me back instantly. I let out a breath almost of built up frustration as we kissed. Not roughly, just kissing. Slowly.

He pressed his hand against my face leaning down as our lips moved together. He pulled back looking at me.

"I'm not having sex with you, not while you're drunk" He said shaking his head, making me sigh closing my eyes. "Okay" I nodded. He sighed wrapping his arms around my back before pressing his lips to mine again briefly.

"If you want it to be me. I wanna be. But not like this" He stated an inch from my face. I nodded looking at him. He stepped back removing his arms.

"I'll take you home, come on" He said grabbing my hand and walking me out of the room.

-

The next few days I avoided him. I was terryfied. I knew he wasn't drunk, so I knew he meant it. But being in the same friend group, I knew I couldn't avoid him forever.

"Soda for the virgin" Chris said handing me a Pepsi. I sighed and saw Matt hit his chest shaking his head. "What?" Chris mumbled looking at Matt. Matt glanced down at me and i caught his eye for a moment and then looked down at the drink in my hand.

"So maybe Evan wasn't the right guy, who cares" Madi said pushing my shoulder. I shook my head. "There are other guys" Madi said looking at me. I shook my head.

"No, I'm done. Forget I ever said anything I don't wanna talk about it anymore" I said looking at her. She nodded and looked away. "At least the party was good for someone" Madi said motioning to Nick.

Nick rolled his eyes glaring at Chris. "For about five minutes until Chris came in all 'why are you with your ex?'" Nick glared at Chris. Making us all start to laugh.

"I think your exact words were 'If i start talking to my ex please pull me away'" Chris said tilting his head at Nick, who just shook his head. I let out a breath and leaned against the couch. I couldn't help but look over at Matt, who turned to look at me the same time.

We just looked at each other for a second.

"So birthday on Saturday" I felt Chris push my leg making me break my gaze and look up at him. I nodded looking down. "Do you know what you're doing yet?" He asked raisng his eyebrows. I shook my head.

"I don't know I think birthday's are kind of stupid, i was just born nothing crazy happened" I smiled up at him, making him rolling his eyes. "Come on" He shook his head. I shrugged.

"I'll just hang out with you guys that all I really want" I smiled at them. They nodded. "I think we can make that happen" Madi said nodding.

-

"Happy birthday"

I looked up and hugged Nick, who handed me a gift. "It's from all of us" He said talking about the triplets. I smiled taking the gift out of his hand. "Thank you guys" I said looking between the three of them. They all smiled and Matt looked away from me.

A part of me wishes I never kissed him. It's been weird ever since. We barely look at each other and if we do I feel like i'm doing something wrong. There's no more rude or snarky remarks from him, which I weridly miss. And worse of all I can't help but think of him when I'm alone trying to go to sleep. His words ringing in my head.

"If you want it to be me. I wanna be. But not like this"

"Everyone's outside" I said looking up at them and motioning towards the backdoor. They nodded and Nick and Chris walked toward the backdoor as I walked over to the table placing their gift with the rest of them.

I glanced up after hearing the door slide closed but saw Matt still standing there with his hands in his pockets as he looked at me. I looked down at the table.

"Hey what's up?" I mumbled feeling my face go red as I examined the box. He let out a breath and walked up to me. He cleared his throat as he peered down at me.

"I just wanted to talk to you for a second" He stated softly. My heart started to beat. We've avoided this conversation for almost two weeks, I knew it was bound to happen, but I still didn't want to have it.

I swallowed looking up at him. He just stared at me. "Yeah" I sighed looking at him. He looked down before reaching into his pocket before pulling out a small box with a bow. My eyebrows furrowed as I looked down at the box.

"That one is from all three of us, but I got you this" He said motioning to the box already on the table. I glanced to the box already placed and the one in his hands. "Matt you didn't have to-" I started to say.

"I know I haven't been the best friend to you" He sighed looking at me. "And I'm sorry" He said softly. I bit my lip as I took the box out of his hand and pulled the bow untied.

I opened the small box and saw a small gold bracelet, making my face soften. I looked up at him. "Matt" I breathed taking it out of the box. It was a dantey small bracelet with a music note on it.

"I know how much you love music and stuff and I was shopping and I saw it and thought of you. It's nothing big" He shook his head. I shook my head smiling. "It's perfect" I breathed, making him smile.

"Matt, why did you get this for me?" I whispered looking up at him. He just looked down at me, letting out a breath. "I guess as an apology" He said looking at me.

"For giving you such a hard time all the time" He explained making me look down. I shook my head. "It's okay Matt" I said. He let out a breath.

"I guess I just haven't stopped thinking about how you were willing to sleep with Evan Reel, just so that I would stop messing with you" He said making my eyes go wide.

"It wasn't just you" I said. He nodded. "Yes it was. I feel like shit thinking about it" He sighed. I pursed my lips as I looked at him.

"I guess I'm sorry too" I sighed looking at him. He furrowed his eyebrows. "For what?" He whispered. "For kissing you, I probably shouldn't have done that" I said shaking my head. He just looked at me.

"I didn't mind" He said smiling slightly. I smiled and shook my head. "It was--" He said looking at the backdoor. "A good kiss" He said glancing back over at me. I nodded.

"I won't mention the whole virginty thing again, and I'll make sure no one else does either. I'm sorry that you felt pressured, that's not how it's suppose to be. It's suppose to be with someone you actually like and trust" He said shaking his head. I nodded slowly.

"Yeah, thanks" I breathed. He nodded.

"If you want it to be me. I wanna be. But not like this"

"Thanks for the bracelet" I said holding it up. He nodded. "Happy birthday" He nodded. I set it down before picking up the bracelet and attempting to put it on.

"Here let me help you" He said stepping towards me and holding my wrist as he snapped it into place. I looked up at him and he looked down at me, his hand still on mine.

"Did you mean what you said?" I whispered quietly. He just stared down at me. I licked my lips as he scanned my face. He nodded slowly. I opened my mouth to speak, but the backdoor opened.

"Y/n! Where are you? We are waiting" I heard Madi's voice. Matt dropped my wrist and we both looked over at her. I let out a breath nodding.

-

The rest of the night I couldn't stop thinking about what Matt said. He did mean it. It was all I could think about, all that was running through my mind.

"Are you not drinking?" Madi asked looking at the soda in my hand. I looked up at her and my eyes went wide. "No, I feel sick" I stated shaking my head. I glanced over to Matt who looked at me and bit back a smile. Fuck, could I make it more obvious?

I felt my face go red and hope to god I didn't make myself too obvious of what I wanted but by the look on Matt's face, he already knew.

Everyone seemed to be having a good time and by the time the sun went down, everyone was already drunk. Except for me and Matt. If everyone was sober, they would notice that we couldn't keep our eyes off of each other, but they were too wasted to tell.

I however was painfully aware of how he was looking at me.

Everyone was lost in their own conversation when we moved into the house because the Boston cold is not for the faint of heart. I moved over sitting on the couch as Chris chugged a beer in the kitchen and Madi and Nick laughed at him.

Matt walked in sliding the door closed before looking over at me by myself on the couch. He glanced over them before shaking his head and walking over to me. I took in a breath as he sat next to me.

"So you're not drinking" He stated glancing at me. I sighed and shook my head. "I'm not" I said looking at him. He licked his lips and looked at me. "Can I admit something to you?" He asked softly. I nodded as I looked at him.

"I hated the way it felt when I saw someone else on top of you" He said looking at me. I didn't say anything I just looked at him. "I don't know. I guess it was selfish for me to barge in, but--" He shook his head.

"I don't know I guess I don't understand how I feel about you, I just know I don't want to see you with another guy" He admitted looking at me. I furrowed my eyebrows.

"Can I admit something to you?" I whispered, he looked back at me waiting for me to speak. I felt my face turn red. Was I really about to say this?

"I had a dream about you" I said glancing over at him. He furrowed his eyebrows and smiled. "Yeah?" He whispered. I nodded. "What was it about?" He asked as he looked at me. I just stared at him, unable to speak.

He licked his lips and turned away, smirking slightly.

"Are you tired?" He asked suddenly looking over at me. I furrowed my eyebrows and shook my head. He stood up from the couch. I just watched him. "Y/n's tired. I'm gonna walk her up to her bed" He announced to the room. My eyes went wide as I looked at him.

Their attention turned to Matt. Madi's eyes glanced over to me and I just looked at her. "Okay, we will be outside" Madi said back grabbing Chris and Nick's arm and dragging them back towards the door. "Ow, It's cold out there" Chris whined as she pushed them out the door.

Matt looked back at me and I stood up.

"Are we gonna talk about this?" He asked looking at me. I shrugged. "I don't know" I admitted. He swallowed. "I want it to be you" I whispered. He stepped towards me. "Are you sure?" He asked. I nodded.

"Are you still with Jessica?" I asked. He let out a breath. "I told her it was over after I kissed you" He admitted, making me smile. "If you don't want to make this into anything more than it is that's fine" He shook his head.

"It can be purely transactional" He said stepping towards me. "Okay" I breathed. "Okay?" He asked. I nodded. "I trust you" I said. He smiled and nodded. He glanced towards the stairs then back to me.

Within three minutes we were up in my room, his lips pressed to mine. If you would have told me this would be happening a week ago, I would have never believed you.

I pulled back. "Have you ever been with a virgin before?" I asked looking at him. He shook his head. "Okay" I breathed out, anxiety filling my chest worried I was going to disappoint him with my lack of experience.

"If you want to stop at any point, I'll stop and I won't mention it and we don't have to talk about it. I don't want you to feel like you can't change your mind, no matter how far we are okay?" He said looking down at me. I let out a breath nodding.

I already felt way more comforable than when whatever was happening when I was with Evan. I swallowed.

"I-I'm not like other girls that you've been with so if i do anything wrong, I want you to tell me because I have no idea what i'm doing" I whispered back. He smiled and looked down at me.

"That's a good thing y/n" He said looking down at me. "I wanna make you feel good too, I just--" I started to say. "You'll do fine. Just trust your instincts" He said shaking his head smiling.

"I don't have instincts" I said making him chuckle. He nodded. "Just follow my lead okay?" he said as he pressed his lips against mine. I melted into the kiss as he wrapped his hands around me, pulling our bodies together before pushing me back against the bed.

He stood in front of me and ripped his shirt off throwing in on the floor. I smiled up at him as he crawled over me grippng my chin in his hand as he kissed me, slipping his tonuge into my mouth.

I trailed my hands down his back, slightly scratching my nails against his back. He whined against my lips, surpising me making me smile. His hands stayed by my head while one slightly grazed my side.

"Matt you're not gonna break me, touch me like you mean it" I said pulling apart and looking at him breathing heavy. "Are you sure?" He breathed looking at me. "Show me what the hype’s about" I smiled up at him. He licked his lips smiling.

"I'll tell you if it makes me uncomforable, just do whatever you want" I spoke. His eyes glistened. "Don't tell me that" He shook his head. I smiled and moved my hands in his hair.

"Do whatever you want to me Matt" I whispered again looking at me. He smiled before pushing my shirt completely up exposing my bra in front of him. He attached his lips to my neck and pushed his hands over my chest squeezing my breasts. I breathed in from the unfamiliar touch.

I arched against his touch. "Sit up" he said against my neck. I sat up and in one swift motion he pulled my shirt over my head and unhooked my bra with one hand, ripping it off of me. I breathed in from the coldness of the air hitting my bare chest.

He sat up looking down at me. I just looked at him as his eyes scanned my body. Oh god. Oh god. A boy is staring at me and I am naked. No one has ever seen me naked in a sexual way before. I didn't know if i had good boobs. I didn't know if I looked hot. I had no idea what I looked like compared to every other girl he's been with.

"God, they're perfect" He whispered looking down scanning my body before kissing down my chest and pinching my nipple in between his fingers, making me moan even catching myself by surprise.

"They're okay?" I mumbled from above him. He leaned up pressing his lips against mine biting harshly on my bottom lip, slipping his tounge into my mouth, fully pressing his hands over my bare self.

"You have the prettiest tits i've ever seen" He mumbled against my lips making me smile. "Thanks I guess" I swallowed looking at him. He smiled.

"You should wear more revealing clothing. It'd drive me crazy because I know i'm the only one who knows what's underneath" He said before leaning up and unbuttoning his pants. I felt my face go red at his statement, making him smile as he pushed his pants down and kicked them off leaving him in his underwear in front of me.

"Are you doing okay?" He asked looking down at me. I nodded. "I'm okay" I breathed. He smiled leaning back down over me. "Okay" He whispered. "Don't be nervous" He shook his head.

"Yeah it's not like your dick is going inside me" I stated looking at him making him chuckle. "Is it gonna hurt?" I whispered. He let out a breath looking at me, nodding. I let out a breath leaning my head back.

"I'll talk you through it, it's okay. Do you wanna stop for a second?" He asked looking down at me. I swallowed. "Just take a few deep breaths and tell me what you're thinking" He whispered kissing the side of my face softly.

"Matt I have feelings for you"

He looked up at me. "I haven't stopped thinking about you for weeks and I-I just wanted to tell you before we did this" I swallowed looking at him. "If that makes you want to change your mind I get that--" I stuttered.

"It only makes me what to do it more" He stated cutting me off. I just blinked at him. "I like you too you idiot" He shook his head. I smiled letting go of a breath. "You do?" I asked. He rolled his eyes.

"Thought I made it obvious" He stated. I glared at him. "What? No you were such a--" I started to say but he pressed his lips to mine keeping me from speaking. I smiled against his lips as he pushed my legs apart and reached down unbuttoning my pants.

"Can I take these off?" He asked pulling apart. I nodded. He pushed them down and I kicked them off, and his hands immediatly went over my underwear.

I took a breath in and pushed my knees together. He sighed leaning his head against my shoulder. "You don't know how many times I've thought about this" He mumbled against my shoulder. I looked up at the ceiling.

"Really?" I asked as he felt me over my underwear. "Really" He stated as he pushed his fingers under my underwear and moved his fingers into me.

I grabbed his shoulder. "Matt" I breathed. He stopped. "What?" he froze. "Your fingers are cold" I breathed making him chuckle before pushing one of his fingers into me completely. I moaned from the feeling.

"God, keep doing that" He said kissing my neck. I let out unsteady breaths. I opened my mouth from the feeling of his finger inside me, slightly wincing. "You're so tight, fuck" He said lifting his head and looking at me.

He pushed in and out of me making me whine and close my eyes. "Matt fuck I-" I said pushing against his fingers. "Feels good?" He asked kissing the side of my face. I just responded with a moan and placed my hand on the back of his neck. He pulled his fingers out of me making me whine and open my eyes.

"I can keep doing that and we can be done if you don't wanna go all the way" He whispered. I shook my head. "No, please. I need all of you" I breathed looking at him, making him smile.

He leaned up pushing down my underwear making me completely bare underneath him. I just watched him as he pushed his hand over himself through his underwear letting out a hard breath.

"Tell me about your dream" He said hanging his hand as he pressed his hand against his length squeezing his eyes closed. I let out a breath as I watched him.

"Please" He whispered. I opened my mouth letting out a breath. "We were here. On my bed--" I breathed. He swallowed. "And you told me I wasn't as innocent as you thought" I explained, making him smile.

"I was begging you to fuck me and you said you wanted me to see stars" I breathed. He opened his eyes and stopped. "You wanna see stars?" He asked. I nodded. He smiled. "Then I'll make you feel like you're in the sky angel" He whispered before pulling his underwear down and climbing on top of me and pressing his lips to mine.

He spread my legs apart before lining himself up with me. "Go slow" I whispered. He nodded. "Are you okay? Are you ready?" He asked looking at me. I nodded. "I need you Matt please" I whined making him smile and take in a breath.

"I need you more trust me" He breathed before pushing inside me. I swallowed as he pushed inside of me. I whined from the inpact as he let out unsteady breaths. "Are you okay?" He asked looking up at me. Pain spiked through my body. Well, I wasn't a virgin anymore.

I looked up at the ceiling nodding. "Just keep going" I breathed out. He pushed into me more, making me wince. He let out a breath. "You don't have to take all of it" He said. I let out a breath trying to adjust to the new feeling.

"I'm taking all of it" I said back. He chuckled and shook his head before contiuning to push all the way in me. I gripped his shoulder hard. "Matt, oh my god" I cried looking up. He stared down at me. I felt him pulsing inside me.

"Tell me when you're ready" He whispered looking down at me. I took in a breath. "Okay, I'm ready" I said back before he pushed out of me almost compelely before pushing into me again. Oh my god, I was having sex.

His head fell against my shoulder. "You feel so. good." He mumbled against my skin, making me smile. He slammed into me a little harder making me moan loudly. Something I never thought I'd do in front of a boy, I always thought It ws kind of embarrassing. But I could NOT help it.

I pulled him closer to me pressing our chest together and digging my nails in his back. "Fuck" He cursed from the feeling. He kissed down my face and to my neck. He sped up slightly, making me whine beneath him.

"Are-Are you okay?" He asked quickly. I nodded profusley, thinking I would die if he stopped. The pain almost had completely subsided. He smiled at my reaction before pressing his lips to mine again.

"You're doing so good for me" He mumbled against my lips, making me clench around him as he moved against me. He bit on my lip harder. I dug my nails deeper.

"Fuck, keep doing that" He grunted against my lips. "You're so pretty, so perfect letting me do this to you" He whispered against my ear, making my eye close and whine. I don't know why but it turned me on even more when he was talking to me, especially like this.

He pushed his hand down between us moving his hand in circles against me. I jerked against him, grabbing his arm. "M-" I tried to speak but I couldn't. I felt like I couldn't keep going like my body was taking this all at once and I was going to explode.

I squirmed under him, shaking my head. He looked up at me. "You've got it. It's just an orgasm, just let go" He shook his head looking at me. "Matt I can't take-" I cried as he pushed into me.

"Yes you can, I promise. I'm close too, but i'm not finishing before you" He shook his head moving his hand faster. I arched against his touch before I screamed letting go all over him. He pulled out before finishing immediatly all over me, before he even had time to touch himself.

I sighed feeling my body go limp as he hovered over me. He froze staring down at me. "Fuck, I'm so sorry. I did not mean to-" He said looking down at me. I smiled before grabbing his arm pulling him next to me.

"Thank you" I whispered shaking my head. He smiled shaking his head. "No, thank you" He chuckled. I smiled as we stared at each other. "So you've got a praise kink" He chuckled. I furrowed my eyebrows. "What?" I breathed smiling. He licked his lips.

"A praise kink" He repeated looking at me. "Every time I said something, you clenched against me" He stated making my face go red and I turned away from him. He laughed grabbing my arm.

"No, no. I love it" He smiled at me. I shook my head looking at him. "So you've got a pain kink" I raised my eyebrows. He let out a breath before turning and sitting up.

"Okay" He chuckled, making me laugh. He stood up before standing up off my bed and pulling his boxers back on. I looked down at my stomach, just seeing him quite literally all over me. I looked over at him and he walked into my bathroom. I just looked up at the ceiling.

Uh what do I do?

I swallowed suddenly feeling very vulernable, just being left here. I looked back at the bathroom hearing the water running, not seeing him. I let out a breath sitting up on my elbows.

"Woah woah, lay back down"

I turned seeing Matt walking back from the bathroom with a towel in his hand. I stared at him. "I didn't think you were coming back" I stated honestly. His eyes went wide and he shook his head as he climbed back on the bed.

"Wow you really do think I'm an asshole" He shook his head smiling as he climbed back over me and moved the wet towel over my stomach. I just watched him as he moved the towel against me and then in between my legs.

"Guess what" I whispered. He glanced up at me. "What?" He smiled looking back down at the towel. "I'm not a virgin anymore" I smiled. He shook his head as he climbed off of me throwing the towel into the dirty clothes. He grabbed his shirt before looking at me.

"Sit up" He stated. I sat up before he pulled the shirt over my head. He crawled off my bed before walking over to my drawers and looking through them. I realized what he was doing.

"Top drawer" I stated. He looked over at me before nodding and pulling out a pair of underwear and shorts before walking back over to me. I just watched him as he moved my legs and pulled them over me.

"You didn't have to do this" I whispered as he pulled my shorts over me. He shook his head smiling. "Yes I do" He stated before setting my legs back down and crawling over me, placing a kiss on my cheek and laying against me.

I smiled as I ran my hands over his back softly, before I realized I quite literally drew blood on his back in scratches. "Fuck Matt, I'm so sorry" I gasped running my fingers over the marks. He chuckled against me.

"It's okay, I have a pain kink" He mumbled, making me laugh. He lifted his head before attaching his lips against mine. I kissed him back softly before he pulled away looking at me.

"How are we going to explain ourselves to all of them downstairs?" I whispered looking at him. He just looked at me smiling. "I don't know. Guess they’re gonna have to get used to it" He smiled. My eyebrows furrowed. "We can do that again?" I asked making him sigh smiling.

"If I'm lucky" He whispered, making me shake my head. He leaned down kissing me once more before rolling off of me and pulling me up with him. "Where are we going?" I smiled as he pulled his pants back on.

"I'm gonna go introduce my friends to my girlfriend" He smiled. I shook my head. "Were you going to let me know that I was your girlfriend?" I chuckled, biting back a smile. He shook his head walking up to me.

"The second you kissed me, you were mine" He whispered looking down at me before kissing me briefly and then grabbing my hand.

"Now come on birthday girl"

wowwwzaaaa idk how to feel ab this one but yall loved the first part so hear ya go. this was only a two parter love ya

tag list: @rac00ns-are-c00l4 @miastromboli @secret-sturniolo @sturnsclutter @sturniolodreamz @paper-crab @chrisolivia4l @mwah0mwah @recklesssturniolo @ejswift @kitaysworld @meg-sturniolo @nickmillersn1gf @fr3shl0ve @adrianaturnedpretty @oversturn @ghostgurlswrld @flowerxbunnie @ilytrinsworld @lustfulslxt @kiarastromboli @gemofthenight @blahbel668 @haunted-headset @sturnybabes @bethsturn @d3adlyclassrat @sturnybabes @mattsbitch @chrisluvbot @nickenthusiast @sturniolossmut @biimpanicking @iloveneilperry @chalametbich @dsmja @bernardsleftbootycheek @lovingsturniolo @aoxash @idrkk-123 @gingerbreadgodofhyperdeath @babagurlrichey @sturniolosreads @mattsonlywife @matthemunch44 @evie00000 @urfavpouge @crybabycat1

[yeeterthek33per]

I want to hear you say it (Zećira Mušović x Reader)

A/n requested

Warnings: SMUT 18+ MDNI, jealous Z, unwanted flirtations. Terrible swedish translations.

As if today couldn’t have gotten any worse, it felt like a major kick in the stomach when you were forcibly dragged away from your own car after training and shoved into the back of Sam’s for team social night. 

It had started off with you nearly not waking up to your third and final alarm of the day leaving you running into training late, much to the annoyance of Emma and the girls who had to join you in sprints this morning.

After that rough start to training, you were then volunteered to introduce the new girl to the rest of the team, a young twenty-something fresh out of the Chelsea grassroots academy.

She was nice but a bit overbearing, practically hanging off you for the rest of the day.

Unfortunately, this left you with little time to spend with your favourite person.

-

Zećira, much like yourself, was ridiculously grumpy all training. Normally she’d have you to herself for most of it. 

Of course, being a striker and a goalkeeper, you had separate sessions to each other, but the warmups are generally intermingled.

So, when you had paired up for drills, you were the first person to grab her, just about growling at anyone who tried to pair up with her instead of you.

That said, the new kid, Sally?

She doesn’t really remember, nor care…

To be fair, she’d been latched onto you like a leech the whole time. It was obnoxious the number of times she was verbally and physically throwing herself at you.

Zećira could ignore it most of the time, given she had to focus on her own drills with the others, but she couldn’t miss the tone of Sadie’s voice every time she came within hearing distance of you both.

It was a sickly-sweet tone with heavy undertones, and it annoyed the Swedish woman to no end.

Regardless, even if it was annoying her, you looked like you’d been completely oblivious to the most obnoxiously obvious flirtations Sarah sent your way.

That’s what frustrated her the most, your ignorance of the situation at hand and the way you let the twenty-two-year-old cling to you like that.

Now that you’re in the bar, Zećira is watching as Summer leans uncomfortably close to you, hand grazing your arm as she animatedly asks you question after question about your life and what it’s like on the senior team.

You don't step away from it, not really, although, it seems, even you have your friendly limits.

The goalkeeper feels her chest start to heat up with the familiar low burn of jealousy.

A cough from across the table catches her attention.

“Zee, the staring isn’t subtle.”

There’s a raised brow on Niamh’s face as she glances back and forth between you and the goalkeeper with a small smirk.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Even if that’s the case, the poor newbie over there is definitely feeling your laser glare right about now.”

Zećira’s glare moves to the Canadian across from her.

“Good, I hope so.”

Both of them let out a small snort at the Swede, nudging her shin when she turns back to you, making her look away again.

“What?”

“For the love of god, just tell her, she’s definitely not into flirty pants over there, and you have the best chance out of literally anyone here.”

“I seriously have no idea what you’re talking about. You pair are crazy.”

The pair groaned and just shoved the goalkeeper away from the table and out of her seat.

“Go save the poor woman, at least. If you won’t acknowledge your blatantly obvious love for our Striker, the least you can do is pull McFlirt over there off her."

-

“Oh my god, you’re so right!”

Savannah’s voice was getting a little grating in your ears now.

Flinching away at the loudness of the laugh so close to your ear, you cover it up with a signal to the bartender to bring you another glass of Vodka Soda, given you weren’t driving now anyway and the trainers weren’t here to scold you for drinking midseason.

“So- “

A soft throat clearing from just behind your shoulder makes the newbie in front of you jump a little out of her focus on you.

The warmth radiating from Zećira with how close she’s standing to you makes you relax back into the goalkeeper but also lightly shiver with the proximity.

“Oh... hi. You’re Zekira, right?”

You look up slightly at the raven-haired woman just in time to see her eye twitch slightly at the pronunciation.

“It’s Zećira actually.”

“Of course, right.”

There’s a small, awkward silence before Zećira clears her throat again.

“So Selena-“

“It’s Savannah.”

“Right, I think Niamh and Jessie were looking to talk to you.”

The blonde lights up suddenly at the mention of the two, to which when she makes eye contact with them as they look towards the suddenly excited new girl, they glare back at her when she smirks at them.

Once the girl disappears to go find the Canadian and English friends, Zećira turns to you with a small smile that you gratefully reciprocate.

Leaning back into the taller woman, you offer her the seat now free in front of you next to the bar but she shakes her head, instead gently grabbing your hand, leading you towards the outdoor area of the bar, settling in by one of the heaters.

It’s not a particularly cold night, but it’s just chilly enough to have a reasonable excuse to tuck yourself under her arm and lean your head on her shoulder.

It was silent now, but not like before.

The quiet was a welcome one, and it was quite common between you.

Zećira was your favourite person for the same reason you were hers.

Not that either of you really knew that.

You were both quiet people. You enjoyed the company of the rarely brooding but often times peacefully listening goalkeeper.

If you’d needed to rant, she’s always been an open ear for you.

If you needed a hug, she’s right there to give the warmest, tightest, sweetest hug you’ve ever had. They’d send tingles down your spine, and her hands are always sure on your lower back as your arms wrap around her neck.

The smell of her shampoo leaves you feeling slightly dizzy when you’d bury your face there after long and tiring days.

Her hand would settle on your knee comfortingly when you curl up beside her while binging tv shows after every one of your breakups.

Her overall presence keeps you going day to day.

Despite that. You were only friends.

Good friends, but friends nonetheless.

Right?

“Hey, I have to pee, I’ll be right back.”

Zećira hums softly and lifts her arm to let you out of the booth again.

Making your way over to the bathroom, you do your business, and as you're washing your hands to touch up, the door creaks open behind you, and you lift your head to look at them.

It’s Savannah.

“Oh hey, I was looking for you, I was wondering if maybe we could, you know, hang out some time?”

“Like to practise and stuff?”

“Well, I mean more like, come to dinner with me.”

Oh.

Right as you’re about to answer with a soft no to let her down easy, the door opens behind her and Zećira walks in, looks slowly between the two of you before slipping into a stall herself.

There's a small awkward silence now as you shift uncomfortably under the stare of her.

“Look, as nice as you are, I’m not interested in dating right now. And you're far younger than me, I'm sorry but I'm just not interested.”

“At least give me a chance to- “

Zećira steps out of the stall at that exact moment, moving to the sinks.

“Look, kid, she said no, maybe take that as an answer instead of embarrassing yourself further, alright?”

She punctuates it with little flicks of water at the sink after washing her hands.

Savannah’s face turns bright red, and she mumbles a quiet apology and ducks out of the door swiftly.

You turn to the Swedish woman with a raised brow.

“What’s up with you, grumpy?”

She feigns confusion and looks at you funny, moving to dry her hands on some paper towel.

“What are you talking about?”

“You never get that snappy with anyone, even the persistent ones.”

Zećira steels her expression lightly but stays quiet.

“Zee…?”

It catches you off guard when she steps forward, hands grabbing your waist to walk you back into the wall.

The small “oof” you let out echoes in the small dimly lit bathroom, and your cheeks flush as her grip tightens on you.

“Zee… what are you- “

At that, she swiftly leans down to capture your lips with her own. A small gasp leaves your mouth but is quickly smothered, and one hand reaches up to grip the back of her neck while the other rests on her cheek.

The more your lips move together, the more antsy you get, and you nip at her lower lip slightly as she pulls back to take a breather.

Her lips are slightly swollen, and you can’t imagine yours aren’t the same.

With flushed cheeks, she dips back into you again, this time, though, her hands grip the underside of your thighs and lift you up onto the counter with a small squeak erupting from your lips.

“Zee, we’re gonna get caught -"

“So let them, even better if it’s that little-“

With a soft shake of your head, you pull her back in again to shut her up.

It’s a softer, slower kiss this time, one that she takes her time pulling away from.

With slow abated breaths, you move your other hand to cup the other side of her face.

“If you’re gonna kiss me like that in a bathroom, give a girl a warning first.”

Zećira blushes harder this time and almost pulls away out of fear of rejection, but you quickly tighten your legs around her waist, holding her to you.

“Something you wanna tell me, Zee?”

The small, curious, and teasing smile on your lips makes her stop.

Though, there must be something in your eyes at that point because she relaxes against you, hands moving back to grip your thighs again.

“Can I tell you later, because you and I both know what’s gonna come out of my mouth next and I really want to keep kissing you.”

A finger on her lips stops her from leaning down again and you raise a brow giggling softly.

“I want to hear you say it.”

“Du betyder allt för mig.” (You mean everything to me)

Your heart races. You knew Swedish enough to understand what she just said, and it completely catches you off guard.

But you release a shaky breath and let your hand fall onto the back of her neck again.

“Inte vad jag förväntade mig....” (Not what I expected)

She stops for a second. You continue.

“But it’s what I needed to hear.”

Her breath hitches at that, and you tug her down again, her hands tightening their grasp, nails digging slightly into your skin, leaving you keening into her.

At the noise escaping from the back of your throat, she slips them up to ride under your shirt, tracing a small path into the skin beneath the fabric.

You make a half attempt to pull her closer yet, pressing yourself right to her, hips rocking into her softly.

She groans at the way your nails dig into her shoulders when she trails kisses down the side of your jawline, tracing a line straight down to the junction of your neck and shoulder.

Tilting your head to give her more access, your breathing becomes more ragged, and your eyes flutter shut as her teeth take the skin there and tug lightly, her lips soothing the ministrations behind them.

Shifting to give herself a little space, her fingers move to swiftly unbutton the fabric currently standing in her way and with a soft growl, she finally tugs it open, head dropping to press kisses to your collarbone, nipping occasionally.

“Fuck.”

You breathe out when Zećira’s fingers dip below the waistline of your slacks, half tugging at them.

“Off.”

The commanding tone is firm but a little breathless as she pulls back to look you dead in the eye.

Letting out a soft pleading whine, you obediently lift your hips to let her tug them down along with your underwear at the same time, leaving you bare to the cool air, to which you shiver slightly.

A slight brush of her fingertips on your clit is enough to have you whimpering into her mouth.

You’ve never been this sensitive to someone’s touch but there’s something about the taller woman in front of you now, teeth digging into your lower lip, fingers still teasing you, that has you losing your mind on a public bathroom counter.

“Please.”

It’s a soft, keening whine, but it makes her chuckle, and she hushes you, thumb coming up to tug at your lip before her other hand finally applies enough pressure to your clit to have you bucking up into her hand.

“So wet for me already, Princesse.”

There’s a small tone of surprise behind it, and you nod at her, guiding her hand down lower with small encouraging whispers of “Please baby. I need you.”

She traces small circles around your clit for a moment and slowly dips her index and middle finger down, working them into you from the awkward angle of the sink.

She uses her hand to muffle your moans before they become too loud and starts thrusting at a fast pace, fingers bending at the right spot, leaving you a moaning mess embarrassingly quickly, completely at her mercy as she fucks you.

Her wrist moves her thrusts into you a bit harder, and you have to fight not to moan any loader lest someone catch you like you’d been fearing this whole time.

When she ducks her head down to mouth at the skin of your collarbone again, you know you’re a goner. 

A whimpering, keening, moaning mess.

The fact she’s got you this close this fast has you a little concerned for your own stamina, but it’s wiped from your mind the moment her lips are on yours again.

Hearing you moaning like this for her only makes her double her efforts, fingers tapping your g-spot with renewed vigour, and it throws you close to the edge swiftly.

You can feel your legs start to tremble a little, and she can feel you tighten around her, her thrusts meeting a little more resistance now.

“That’s it, älskling.”

The soft praise only spurs you on and your hips lift to meet her thrusts and it takes but a few brushes of her thumb on your clit to send you over.

Thighs twitching, legs tightening around the goalkeepers hips as your back arches into her.

She’s muttering sweet nothings to you as you come down, soft muttered "you're so beautiful"'s and "Good girl"'s.

If you weren't already mid orgasm, that in itself would have sent you over.

“My sweet, beautiful girl.”

There’s a slight whine in your throat when her thumb moves against your clit a little, still sensitive from your orgasm just mere seconds ago.

“Zee.”

It’s a soft, breathy whine, and she smiles, removing her hand slowly and taking your lips with hers again.

“I love hearing my name on your lips, I need to hear it more, back to my place?”

You nod swiftly, letting her guide your underwear and pants back up, the haze of an orgasm still very much on your mind.

On shaky legs, you clean up a little, settling the sex-mussed hair on both of you and attempting, albeit failing, to cover up all of the marks left on your neck with her jacket which she settles around your shoulders after you shiver a little when you step out of the bathroom.

Thankfully, the bathroom is around a corner from where your teammates are tucked away in a set of booths so you both wave at them from a distance as you exit the bar, ignoring the looks you get from them.

Zećira guides you down the concrete sidewalk towards her car in the small parking lot beside the building.

-

Zećira can hardly focus on getting her keys in the lock with you nipping at her collarbone the way you are. That and your hands have slipped under the fabric of her button-up shirt to gently scratch at the skin of her abs.

“Älskling, please, need a second to get the door open.”

You feign innocence, a small pout on your lips, but they quirk up a little at her while she shakes her head lightly at the cheeky expression on your face.

Slipping your hands further up, she whines when you cup her through her bra, hands cold against her skin.

She curses the key in her hand when she finally gets the door unlocked, dragging you inside by the collar to slam you against it.

"Couldn't behave for one second to get us inside, could you?"

Chuckling, you tug her closer by the belt loops.

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

She rolls her eyes.

"I'm sure you don't."

Following swiftly with that, her knee presses between your legs, hands fully unbottoning and removing your shirt now, tossing it to the side.

"Eager?"

The smug grin on your face has her a little flustered, but she raises a brow down at you.

"I've finally got you here to myself, I'm not wasting anymore time getting you in my bed."

You chuckle softly, hands grabbing hers to steady them before pulling off and throwing her jacket to the side, hands tugging at her button-up to slowly remove it, softly grazing the skin of her shoulders as you push it off.

"We have all the time in the world, Baby. I'm not going anywhere."

She softens, and her hands grasp yours, gently tugging you down the hall to her bedroom, walking half turned towards you, eyes locked on yours.

"I'm right here, Zee. I'm all yours."

The soft reassurance has the last of her nerves settling once again, making way for the sweet, charming Zećira you know and love.

The shakiness in her limbs disappears altogether, making it easier for her to pull you back into her, hands settling on your hips, and she kisses you.

You lean up into it, pushing back as she applies a little more force into it, letting it fall naturally heavier with every move, nip, and caress.

A warmth starts to settle back into your stomach, and you nudge her towards the bed, to which she flips you back onto the mattress, hovering over you.

It's in slow movements, met with kissing you all the way back until your head hits the pillows.

You're craving her warmth a little more, so you tug the swede down onto you rather forcefully, leaving little room for argument as her hand slips under your shirt to grip at your chest, kneading the soft flesh there with a small sigh.

A whine slips out from the back of your throat when her fingers roll your nipple between them, pinching and tugging at the skin gently.

The taller woman pushes herself up slightly, kneeling, and pulls you up with her.

Soft, tender hands move to the buttons of your shirt, move, and undo each one slowly until reaches the bottom one, to which her two fingers under your chin bring your gaze back up to meet hers.

"Eyes on me, sweetheart."

You just about melt under the slowly darkening gaze of the woman.

The single flick of her fingers to unclip your bra and throw it to meet the discarded shirt has your mind nearly turned to mush right there.

With a soft muttered, "So beautiful."

She's swift to kiss you and push you back into the pillow, resuming her previous actions.

The cool air in the room does little to sate the heat taking over your skin, everywhere she touches, feels like a small fire under her fingertips, leaving you keening into her touch.

One hand remains on your breast, the other tracing a minuscule path over your ribcage and to the edge of your pants, tugging at the fabric.

She doesn't have to ask this time, though, as you immediately lift your hips to allow her to pull them off.

Her kisses trail away from your lips, shifting down across your jawline, to your collarbone, occasionally leaving small nips on the way down.

Down to your chest, lips wrapping around your nipple, suckling and leaving you a whimpering mess.

The more your whines turn to soft pleas, the more she smirks against your skin when she lets the nipple go and continues a featherlight trail of kisses across your stomach.

"Baby, please."

You can feel the wave of hot air come from her as she chuckles against you.

"What's the matter, darling?"

"I need you."

The keening whine behind the words just have her amused as you buck up into her.

"Yeah? Tell me where. Where do you need me?"

The fact she’s trying to make you think like this, is criminal alone, and it makes you whimper when she extricates herself from your vicinity, a soft but stern tone behind her words.

"Tell me, Y/n. What do you need from me?"

"I need your mouth, fingers, anything. Please just touch me, baby."

A smug, mocking tone makes you whine.

"But I am touching you baby."

Attempting to grab her and pull her back into you, she chuckles and tuts at you, pulling away from your grasp.

"I need you inside me, on me, anything please."

It seems she's satisfied with that because she leans down once again.

Peeling off your underwear, she groans softly at the dampened fabric, head immediately moving to press kisses to the insides of your thighs, hands slipping under them and urging your legs over her shoulders, manoeuvring herself to be directly over your centre.

Hot puffs of air directly hitting your clit leaves you gripping the sheets tightly, breathing more than a little ragged.

"Look at me."

Your head lifts from where it had fallen back, eyes flitting to meet hers in the faintly lit room.

"Good girl."

With that, her mouth is on you swiftly, tongue taking in your taste with a breathy groan.

The warm, firm muscle makes you buck your hips up with a small jerk.

"Jesus, Zee."

Your hand shoots to her hair, gripping the raven locks tightly.

The grunt you're rewarded with has your legs shaking a little with the vibrations and it only makes her grip on your thighs tighten.

Her tongue laps at you, lips taking in your clit with a sharp suck before releasing and returning to thrust into your entrance.

Inevitably, when you let your head drop back against the pillow, a sharp pinch to the leg jolts you back to watch her again

"Keep watching, älskling, don't make me ask again."

The slightly cooler warmth of her breath contrasts against the startling heat of her mouth as it once again latches itself around your clit.

With the way she's devouring you, it feels like her tongue has found a home between your legs, the skillful swift flicks and swipes have your legs trembling beneath the strong grip of her hands over the skin of your thighs.

The moans she's drawing from you feel unrestricted, being released with no thought to them like you’d always done with everyone else.

She makes you feel safe here, in the dimly room of her home, secure beneath her sure touch, without need to restrain yourself.

You feel freer and safer than ever.

One hand releasing your leg brings you back to her, to the warmth of her taking you in with small, breathy groans.

It trails over your hip, gliding over your ribs, brushing the underside of your breast before sliding off to slip your hand into it, tangling your fingers together like they had been in the sheets only moments ago.

The build-up in your gut suddenly alerts you to the oncoming orgasm, the wave having completely snuck up on you.

"F-fuck. Zee, I'm gonna.."

You barely have time to register the small hum against you that's paired with the harsh suck that sends you kareening over.

Her hand squeezes yours, your legs wrap tighter around her shoulders and head, and her eyes follow the way your back arches up and your hips buck into her mouth, her other hand forcing your hips back into mattress.

She can feel her own arousal building just at the sight of you writhing beneath her, chest heaving with the efforts of her mouth on you.

The way her already dark brown eyes dilate at watching you cum on her tongue, the flood of your taste meeting her tastebuds as she slips her tongue inside you to clean up.

Her hand never leaves yours until you're needily fisting at her to pull her up to eye level once again, wasting no time kissing her.

The sweet, slightly tangy taste of yourself on her lips has you whining softly, and it takes little effort to push her onto her back, straddling her waist.

"Okay?"

You raise a brow at the soft pout on her lips.

"Who said I was done with you?"

Chuckling, you lean down to capture her lips in a brief, soft peck.

"No one, baby, it's my turn, now relax. I've been dying to taste you."

Clearly, your words have an effect on her, because you can feel the shiver run through her beneath you, and the way her fingers grip your hips tighter along with the small sigh she let's out when your lips trail down her exposed collarbone.

You're met with little resistance once your teeth dig into the soft pale skin of her chest, above the line of her bra, as you pull her up to sit up so you can reach behind to tug open the clasp.

Tossing it away, her hands find the back of your head, pulling you back down to kiss her again.

A smile crosses your lips against hers, and you press her back down into the mattress once again, hands holding you up either side of her head.

It takes but a small whine from her when you kiss down to her chest to have you nearly grinding down into her again.

Instead, you focus on the growing want to absolutely ruin the woman below you.

Teeth nipping small marks into her chest, your lips wrap around her nipple, tugging at the nub and releasing it with a small pop, relishing in the ragged gasps coming from above you.

Her fingers have fully tangled in your hair, pleading tugs every now and then, urging you on.

You only chuckle softly at her insistence.

"What's the matter, baby?"

Taking on the same mocking coo she held with you earlier, which she whines and almost rolls her eyes at, your hands still, laying flat over her stomach with your hips settled on top of her own.

"Älskling, baby, please..."

You gently smack away the hand that reaches for you with a smirk.

"Tell me what you want, baby."

The huff she lets out only widens your smile.

"I did not tease you this much."

"Answer the question, Zećira."

Ignoring her indignant whine, you slide a hand up her chest again, fingers twisting and moulding the soft flesh of her breast.

Hearing in that moment, the moment she gives in, the exhale.

A soft curse in swedish, followed by a whimper when you playfully grind your hips down and she's pleading.

"Älskling, god, please baby, fuck me."

"What was that, baby?"

It earns you a small, frustrated whine.

"Your fingers, fuck me with your fingers, your tongue baby please, anything, I need you."

A triumphant grin crosses your face as you lean down to reward the woman, lips meeting hers, hand slipping down to tug at the button on her jeans.

The way she eagerly lifts her hips up, her own hands encouraging yours as you tug down the fabric obstructing you, has you grinning up at the goalkeeper.

Not wanting to tease the woman any more than you had already, you tug down her underwear almost immediately after.

Frankly, you didn't feel like waiting any longer either, only torturing yourself more the longer you waited.

Sitting back on your haunches, just below her knees, reaching out a slow, gentle hand to trace a path down from her stomach to her hip.

To her inner thigh before finally settling, hovering over where she needs you.

Your forefinger and middlefinger apply a small amount of pressure, testing the waters as she watches with shallow rises and falls in her chest.

"Älskling.."

It would sound like a warning if it wasn't paired with a sharp gasp, eliciting when you glide your fingers further down to slip them inside her.

She's soaked through, and you have to hold back the soft groan as you feel her clench around you.

The feeling makes you shift downwards almost immediately, making slow, long strokes as you do so, with gentle curves of your fingers.

Hearing her beg and curse for you like this, you never want this to stop.

With that, your mouth lowers to take her, her hand in your hair now an encouraging force on your head as your tongue drags over her clit.

Her head falls back onto the pillow with what you can only describe as a small pleasured sigh of relief, and you giggle softly, letting your drag down, and back up again, lapping at the wetness accumulating around your hand.

Your other hand keeps her leg steady against the mattress, allowing you easier access as your thrusts speed up.

"Fu-"

She's never been an overtly loud person, so having her moan and curse for you like this, underneath your mouthing ministrations, only drives you even more crazy.

"Så vacker." (So beautiful).

It's a soft mutter against the skin of her inner thigh, paired with small kisses that you trail up to her hip again, meanwhile keeping pace, fingers curling inside her.

With the way her hips buck up into your face, you get the inkling that you speaking swedish to her has her losing her mind above you.

Or it could be the fact you're buried between her legs eating her like she's your last meal.

You don't mind either way.

Getting to hear her like this fuels you alone.

It feels like no time at all passes before her moans shift, and she's crenching a little harder around your fingers while her own tightens in your hair.

"Fuck, Y/n, I-."

"I know, baby. Go ahead, cum for me."

Curling your fingers just right in time with her thrusts, her moans halt as she seizes up, legs trembling around your head.

She's absolutely beautiful when she cums, you've decided.

Her hands slowly release their grip on your tresses and the sheets below the both of you, breathing slower and deeper as she comes down.

Zećira's eyes meet yours once again, noting the shining smug but also awed glint in them.

In that moment, she's decided she's going to drag as many orgasms out of you as she can tonight, unable to be patient enough to wait to see the look on your face once again as your legs shake around her head.

"Get up here."

There's no hesitation. You're up straddling her waist once again as she's sitting up to grip your neck to pull you down to her level.

Her hands settle on your hips once again, sliding back around to cusp your ass, giving the cheeks a quick squeeze, and you giggle softly at the blissed out look in her eyes.

She's absolutely gorgeous with swollen lips, purple marks marring her collarbone, and hair mussed from your hands being buried in them earlier.

They quickly return to that position, fingers carding through the dark locks, thumbs coming to caress her face as you lean down again to kiss her, slower and softer this time.

Loving.

Caring.

Thankful.

Both of you are more than feeling all of that.

There's a shining, loving look in her eyes as she looks up at you, and you feel it flow through your chest in a wave of warmth that makes your skin tingle.

"Hey Zee?"

She hums softly.

"Du betyder allt för mig också." (You mean everything to me, too.)

She grins up at you and the sound of your giggle can be heard as she flips the both of you over onto your back with her on top, lips taking yours in a very much smile filled kiss.

"Feelin' okay?"

"Amazing, you?"

You've never felt safer than here, in her arms.

-

[being-addie]

The Glow Up Game

Part One: Pretty on the Outside

A comprehensive guide to getting your shit together. You heard me. We are done standing on the sidelines, looking at people living their dream lives being rich and hot and happy. WE'RE DONE.

This is a long guide, filled with pointers covering EVERYTHING regarding physical glow-ups. I'll be editing it and reblogging it whenever I come across new ideas and information. It covers everything from head to toe. I mean this literally.

Note: This is for people who want to do glow up physically. It is totally your choice to do anything you want to/don't want to on this list. We live in a world full of unfair beauty standards, and instead of being angry about it, I'm going to exploit the hell out of it.

Are you ready to change yourself? Here we go.

The absolute basics: These are lifestyle changes you're going to implement. Non-negotiable.

Go exercise: Don't look at me like that. This isn't optional. Find a way to move your body so you like it and you're actually breaking a sweat. Leisurely walking on the treadmill does not count, half-hearted zumba does not count. Whatever you're doing, it has to make you SWEAT. A good figure is earned. Trust me when I say you'll feel better, and like what you see in the mirror.

Change your diet: Enough sugar. Toss the soda out, and chuck out your candy stash. You really don't need it. Craving something sweet? Make a batch of healthy, homemade dessert. Or have a piece of fruit. I'm not kidding when I say the kitchen is where you make the biggest lifestyle change. It will be HARD, but every McChicken you say no to, is good for your HEALTH. You want to live longer? Cut out the takeout and heavily processed foods.

Fix your sleep cycle: Sleep is so important, and I think people overlook it so much. All your hard work is wasted if you don't sleep well. Your skin will break out, and your body will refuse to change even if you exercise. SLEEP WELL. Create a nighttime routine and stick to it. Make sure you have at least 7 hours of sleep as a minimum.

Create a skincare routine: Take off your makeup every day. And have a good skincare routine. Cleanse, moisturize and apply whatever you usually do. Exfoliate twice a week and stop touching your face. I also drink an ABC smoothie (Apple+Beetroot+Carrot+Water). This does wonders.

Use sunscreen: I cannot stress this enough. Skin cancer is real, and it will get you if you don't wear sunscreen. Use something higher than SPF 50 and use it religiously. Make sure to get your earlobes, chest and back of your neck. Cover every inch of your skin that will be exposed to the sun.

Drink your water: 3 litres of water per day. You will be amazed at the results. Your skin will clear, your breath won't stink and you won't be dehydrated. This shit works, and there's a reason everyone recommends it. Drink your water.

Moving on to each itty-bitty detail.

Eyes: SLEEP. You want your eyes to look fresh? No pesky dark circles? Get your sleep cycle right. No more late nights. Hot girls sleep on time.

Nose: Those blackhead-looking things are natural, they're called sebaceous filaments. And, no you can't get rid of them. But you can minimize them. Cleanse, moisturize and exfoliate. Don't pick at your skin.

Lips: Don't bite them anymore, for God's sake. You're going to make sure they're chapped beyond belief. Use lip balm religiously and don't overuse lipstick. Your lips WILL get discoloured when you're older. Use a light lip tint, and lip balm/gloss.

Eyebrows: If you want to shape them, go to the hairdresser and get it done.

Facial hair: As someone with naturally dark, thick hair I have a lot of noticeable facial hair. I'm planning on getting it lasered soon. Find a way that works for you and is affordable.

Body hair: I have zero self-consciousness about my arm and leg hair, so I have no desire to shave or wax it. I do wax my underarms, because of ridiculously thick growth. Understand that this is a personal choice, and you do not have to do this if you're unwilling.

Nails: Keep them short or long, always filed and CLEAN. Do not let grime or dirt build-up underneath. Don't keep your nails painted 24/7, it will 100% lead to yellowing. Give your nails some time to breathe between every manicure. When they aren't painted, keep them filed and presentable.

Hair: I have Type 3a curly hair, so my hair routine is tailored to suit me. But what I can tell you is wash your hair at least 1x a week, use sun protectant, and oil your hair before wash day(it works). And use heat on your hair SPARINGLY. If you want to colour you can, but remember it does lead to long term damage, brittleness and bad texture. Get your hair cut every 3-4 months with a trusted hairdresser. Keep switching up hairstyles and do not stick to a single part (middle part, side part) constantly because it can lead to thinning of hair there.

Acne: STOP TOUCHING YOUR FACE I am begging you. Touching your face with grimy hands is a recipe for acne. Cleanse everyday, moisturize heavily and go to a dermatologist if it gets worse.

THIS LIST WILL BE UPDATED

Go live your best life. You deserve everything, and you shouldn't let anything stand in your way, not even yourself. Now GO, you've got shit to do.

xoxo

[yelenasdiary]

It was like reader have a gambling problem but she hasn’t gambled for a long time so “she has it under control”. Tony invites her to a party and she kind of refuses but Tony convinces her to go and there is drugs and gambling there so she kind of relapses in both and her girlfriend hasn’t seen her the whole day because reader didn’t have time to contact her. She asks her sister(s) and they go looking for her just to find her there. Instead of being like mad they try to help her go away from the party and calm and stuff.

Now why didn’t I specify the sister and girlfriend. Because at first o think it was Wanda girlfriend and Nat and yelena the sisters. But if you want to make it yelena girlfriend and Wanda the sister it’s totally fine ☺️☺️

Relapse

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff! x Romanoff! Reader

Summary: Tony begs you to come to a party in hopes your friendly charm get help get more donations. Little does he know; it wasn’t a great idea.

Angst, Super Light Fluff

Translations from Russian & Slovak: сестра (sister), dieťa (baby), Srdiečko (sweetheart)

Warnings: Gambling, Mentions of Drinking, Mentions of drugs & drug usage | 2.2K

AC: Thank you for sending this & I hope you enjoy! x Please note, I have no idea how poker works lmao so bear with me.

Tony looked at you with begging eyes, he never begged anybody for anything, so you knew he must've really needed you to take one for the team. He was throwing another fundraiser party to help raise some money for the Stark Relief Foundation. Your girlfriend was out for the day getting some alone time like she usually does on a Saturday after a mission, Yelena was off seeing your parents, Melina & Alexei while Natasha, your biological sister, was due to come home from a mission. 

"I don't Tony, it's not really my scene" you said hoping he'd understand but how could he? You held a secret from the entire team besides your family and Wanda. It wasn't a big deal that not everybody knew but it was what worked for you. You've been clean for four years and it has been a really long, stressful and hard road to get to where you are today. 

When you escaped the Red Room, you were introduced to a whole different world. A world of hardcore drugs, alcohol and gambling. Those who you thought were your friends at the time quickly learnt that you had a natural talent for poker and used you to win big time, time and time again. In return they fed you drugs and alcohol, you didn't know any better. 

But when Natasha and Yelena finally tracked you down, they did everything in their power to help you get clean. You went to rehab, detoxed and still to this day attend meetings. You were free, once again but this time for real. Your sisters have been a huge part of helping you stay clean, same with your parents, but it's always been somewhat refreshing to have Wanda by your side too. She was there when the doors were closed and you couldn't sleep, when the urge to pick up the bottle after a mission was strong, when there was a birthday party and everybody else was drinking and Wanda stuck to drinking soda or water, so you weren't by yourself. 

She knew when things were getting too much and she was able to take you away from that, to give you a moment to breathe and remind yourself how hard you've worked to stay clean. So, when Tony was sitting before you, begging you to help raise money, you couldn't help but think of the environment you'd be in. 

"We really need this" he replied causing you to sigh, "Fine. But I'm only going for an hour" you said, setting yourself some boundaries. Surely, you'd be able to handle an hour. 

----

The first 30 minutes of the party was going smoothly, you avoided the bar and tried to ignore the smell of alcohol that floated through the room get to you. You spoke to guests while sipping on a class of orange juice, when people asked what you were drinking you lied and said OJ and vodka followed by a comment on how you weren't much of a drinker. 

Tony failed to tell you that there would be a poker table at the party. Once your eyes landed on it, your memories of all your past winnings game flooding back. Thor sat at the table drinking his Asgardian alcohol while making jokes with the other guests at the table. 

"Oh, Y/n, come join us! You seem like you have sense of good luck about you" The god called out. You smiled softly but shook your head as you walked over to the table, "I've never been good at poker" you replied with a friendly chuckle but the urge to join was becoming stronger. The chips in the middle of the table didn't help, you knew you could win big. 

"I'll teach you, take a seat!" Thor added just as Tony came up and took a seat at the table, "You in Y/n?" He looked up at you. Your heart skipped a beat, you knew you had to get out of there, but something came over you and you found yourself nodding and pulling out a seat. "Let's do this" you replied.

Before you knew it, an hour had passed by. You were winning, no doubt about that. You had taken Thor and Tony by surprise, making them more eager to try and beat you with each round. Lost in the moment, a glass of scotch had found its way into your hand. You'd worked out both Thor and Tony's poker faces which only helped you keep winning but eventually Thor pulled out giving you a pat on the shoulder, "you play a good game Y/n" he said friendly before walking away. 

Thor was soon replaced by a guest of the party, a younger gentlemen that had been watching you from afar. "I hope I'm not intruding" he smiled as he took a seat beside you, "but let's make this a little interesting" he added before throwing a small bag of coke into the middle of the table. 

"Oh, there's no need for that" Tony replied.

"No, no, let him play. If that's what he wants to bet, I'm sure that's all he's got" you looked up at Tony before shifting your eyes to the gentlemen beside you with a smug smirk on your lips. 

----

Yelena just got back to the compound to find a room full of strangers, music playing softly under all the chatter from the guest, she sighed and went upstairs to your room to see if you were around. "Yelena! You're back" Wanda greeted her with a warm smile, "I was just about to join the party, are you coming down?" she asked.

"Nooo, parties are not my place" Yelena replied with a light chuckle, "have you seen Y/n?" She asked. 

"No, I'd assume they went for a walk or something given Tony's party which I will be speaking to him about that" Wanda replied with a lightly unimpressed tone.

"Oh good, you're both here" Nat stormed down the hall making Yelena and Wanda turn around, "we have a little problem" Natasha added still in her widow suit. Wanda tilted her head while Yelena frowned with concern. "I'm going to fucking kill Tony" Nat commented before she turned around and started heading towards the party, followed my Yelena and Wanda.

The three stood from afar as they saw you sitting at the poker table, sipping on your drink and laughing along with Tony's terrible joke. By now it's been 4 hours since you entered the party, you'd been up and down talking to people, playing poker and doing a line of coke from your winnings. 

Natasha glared harshly at Tony until he looked up and noticed, "he's so dead!" Yelena added. Tony looked at you, "do you know what that's all about?" He asked, shifting his eyes back to your girlfriend and sisters standing by the door. You looked over your shoulder, "fuck" you mumbled to yourself as they began to walk over to you. 

"Y/n, let's go" Yelena spoke, Natasha b-lining straight for Tony. 

"You, get up now!" She spoke sternly. "What did I do?" Tony asked, standing up from the poker table as Natasha harshly grabbed his arm and walked him out of the party. Wanda picked up your glass and gave it a light sniff, confirming that it was what she dreaded. 

"Y/n, look at me" she spoke softly. You looked at her with a slight eye-roll. Wanda looked up at Yelena, "go get some water and meet us back in our room" she said. Yelena nodded and walked over to the bar, leaving you to answer to your girlfriend. 

"Wands, it's fine! I'm fine, it was just a little bit of fun" you explained hoping she wouldn't be disappointed. "It's not about that sweetheart, I need you to come upstairs with me, the party is over, okay?" she replied in her soft tone. She wasn't trying to pick a fight, not when she didn't know the whole story. You sighed heavily as you stood up from the poker table and followed Wanda out of the room. 

----

"I spoke to Tony, he said if he had of known they were clean, he would never have begged them to help with the party" Natasha said after entering your shared room with Wanda. 

"I mean, he has a point" Yelena replied, "maybe we do tell the others" She added. 

Natasha shook her head, "Y/n doesn't want that" 

"And look what happened" Wanda turned to Nat, "Y/n said that they said no but Tony begged and for the first 30 minutes or so, they did really well but it was Thor who pulled them towards the poker game. None of this would've happened if we were here, or better yet, if they knew what could've happened" she added just as you came out of the bathroom wrapped in a towel. 

"Don't do that" you said, "don't fight over my mistake. I was weak, I didn't listen to myself. I caved and now I have to start all over again, this is on me" you added looking between the three. 

"сестра, this isn't your fault" Nat replied, "there's a meeting in about half an hour, get dressed and I'll take you" she added. 

You sighed, "seriously? I don't need a meeting right now; I'll go to one in the morning" 

"The sooner we get you to a meeting, the sooner we get you back on track" 

"dieťa, Nat's right. You need to go to a meeting, I'll come too" Wanda chipped in as Natasha kept her eyes on you, "where is it?" she asked. 

"Where's what?" You asked with an irritated tone. 

"You know exactly what, where is it?" 

You rolled your eyes, "I flushed it" you replied, lying but your sister didn't buy it for a second and walked right into the bathroom. "Alright!" You sighed once more, "I'll go to a fucking meeting" you added. 

Wanda hated seeing you so worked up, she knew it was the relapse and you'd be thankful for this in the long run, but she couldn't help but feel worried for you. Yelena kept her distance in the moment, whenever you got worked up like this, Nat was always the one who was able to put you back in your place. 

"Yeah, you will be going to a meeting" Nat came out of the bathroom shaking her head, throwing the small now empty bag on the dresser. 

While Natasha took you to the city for a meeting, Wanda stayed back with Yelena. Nat suggested it might not be the best idea to have all three of them hovering over you and Wanda could hear the fearing thoughts that Yelena was having. 

"They'll be okay" Wanda said in comfort, "it's just a hiccup" she added.

"They were sober for so long and what? In less than an hour it's all ruined? You saw that bag; they're going to a meeting high right now" Yelena replied. 

"I know, but we have to give them some credit here, per pressure is a lot especially when they didn't know Y/n's past. If we were there, they would've been okay"

"But we weren't and now we have to watch them go through all this again" Yelena snapped, leaving the room to get some fresh air. 

----

Two days later and it was the late afternoon when you got out of bed, woken by your sister to get ready for your meeting with your sponsor. Your mind was slightly foggy as your body was getting rid of the drug in your system and you felt horrible for the relapse. 

"Hey, I made you a smoothie for your drive" Wanda smiled as you met Nat in the compound's kitchen. You smiled softly at her as you took the smoothie from her hand, "thank you baby" you replied. 

"You're ready?" Nat asked, you nodded, "Yeah, I'll meet you at the car? I just need to get my jacket" you said before taking a sip of your smoothie. "Don't be too long" Nat teased as she walked out of the room, you went to follow her but were stopped by Wanda's grip on your arm. "Srdiečko, are you sure you're okay?" she asked, her eyes full of worry. Your eyes dropped, "I let you down, I let Nat and Yelena down, I let myself down…I thought I was stronger" you replied. 

Wanda gently cupped your face, lifting your head up to look at her. She stroked your cheeks with her thumbs in a comforting way, "You are strong, stronger than you think. This is just a little bump in the road, okay? You're doing all the right things to get back to where you were, you're not the same person you were when you first started to get clean, you're stronger this time. I believe in you, we all do. We are going to get through this" she spoke in a warm, comforting tone. "I love you" she added before kissing you softly. 

"I love you too and I promise, I won't let this happen again" you said as she pulled away, still cupping your face. "How about tonight I cook your favourite and we have a picnic under the stars?" The woman offered, you smiled softly, "I'd love that" you said before kissing her once more.

"You better get going, don't want you to miss that meeting with your sponsor" Wanda smiled.

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[alittlebitofloveliness]

Ponyboy and Addiction

CW: mentions of drugs and alcohol abuse

For a fandom that really seems to like Ponyboy angst people don't really talk much about how the book very carefully but consistently planted the seeds of what could be Ponyboy's downfall in the east side, the main thing that could fuck up his plans for college or any sort of better life: Ponyboy has an addictive personality. The biggest evidence of this is, of course, his nicotine addiction and love of cigarettes which he is scarcely without throughout the book. Yes, all the greasers smoke, and yes, he uses it as a way to calm down in incredibly stressful situations, but the truth of the matter is that Ponyboy is a fourteen year old who cannot go more than a few hours without nicotine. Even after a cigarette lit the church on fire, even when he's recovering from a major concussion, he's still smoking in his bed, and not only a little bit either. Darry tells him he'd 'skin him' if 'he smoked more than a pack' when he's literally confined to bed rest. That's a lot of smokes (I know this is set in the 1960s but a pack a day for a kid who was literally being treated for smoke inhalation earlier in the book is still excessive). However, cigarettes are not the only evidence we have of Ponyboy having the potential for addiction to become a major issue. While it's mentioned he doesn't like alcohol, he does at one point self medicate with asprin, taking far more than the recommended dose-- 5 pills. In the same passage he also offhandedly claims this is something he does frequently, not to help with headaches or anything like that, but to help him fall asleep. Ponyboy is literally self medicating at fourteen with cigarettes and over the counter medication, to treat unrelated ailments-- and is actively hiding this fact from his brothers. It's not touched on far beyond these instances, but its very clear textual evidence of the fact that were Ponyboy to end up getting involved with the wrong crowd or trying the wrong thing, he could very easily destroy his life and any chance of getting out of the east side. In the end, it won't matter if Ponyboy decides to stay gold or not if he gets hooked on the wrong substance. "Oh but lovely, all the greasers are like this"- aside from Two-bit, no one else in the main seven is characterized as having a severe dependence on any sort of substance. Canonically, Soda doesn't drink, we never see Steve, Dally, or Darry inebriated on page, although they all do occasionally drink; and while all of them smoke, Ponyboy is constantly and repeatedly referred to as the 'weed fiend' of his family and to some extent the gang. Ponyboy Curtis and Two-bit Matthews are the two members of the gang with addictive personalities, addiction has the potential to be Ponyboy's undoing and I will die on this hill.