#abro questioning

[itsoktocallmegay]

(Please do not respond to this post if you don’t support any of what I discussed. Just block me.)

Ok, so I’m going to make a post about my abrospec questing because I’m trying to explore it but am having trouble figuring out what label fits me best. And, yes, I understand that I don’t have to use any specific label, I just want to look at what’s out there.

So, usually I feel like I’m on the multispectrum, and my romantic attraction is almost always mspec in some way, like bi, pan, poly or omni, or even just multiromantic, while my sexual attraction can fluctuate into the monospec spectrum as well, and sometimes I’m mostly sapphic or mostly achillean and have a connection to the terms lesbian and veldian. Usually I feel somewhere on the aroace and never feel fully alloromantic or allosexual. I also am fluid between aspec orientations, like demiaroace, repciroace, greyroace, cupiorose, and orchidrose.

My tertiary attractions are also usually aspec, except for my aesthetic attraction. I am very much alloaesthetic. My aesthetic attraction is actually stronger than most alloaesthetics tbh. Is there a label for really strong, queer aesthetic attraction, now that I’m mentioning it? My aesthetic attraction tends to fluctuate along with my sexual attraction but feels for on the pan-bi-omni spectrum. My other attractions tend to fluctuate between different aspec orientations, between pan and omni, and between sapphic and achillean.

My attraction can also fluctuate with my gender to be queer in some way, like nblm/mlm towards men or queer wlm towards men, nblnb, and nblm/wlw or queer mlw. I tend to feel same gender attraction though, but at times it does feel like queer different gender attraction. But, my attraction is always queer in some way.

[genderstarbucks]

Mspecgayman-Questioning is a term for individuals who are questioning if they're a gay man or mspec.

Bigayman-Questioning is a term for individuals who are questioning if they're a gay man or bi(romantic, sexual, etc.)

Poly/plygayman-Questioning is a term for individuals who are questioning if they're a gay man or poly/ply(romantic, sexual, etc.)

Pangayman-Questioning is a term for individuals who are questioning if they're a gay man or pan(romantic, sexual, etc.)

Omnigayman-Questioning is a term for individuals who are questioning if they're a gay man or omni(romantic, sexual, etc.)

Abrogayman-Questioning is a term for individuals who are questioning if they're a gay man or abro(romantic, sexual, etc.)

Haven't posted any mogai stuff in a hot minute oopsie daisy

[bilesbianblog]

Bi lesbian culture is when you can’t understand if you’re a biromantic lesbian or a lesbiromantic bisexual due to abrosexuality and not understanding anything

[questioning-aspec-culture-is]

Questioning aspec culture is spending AGES in the cycle of being 100% confident in a label, feeling it only sorta fits, being unsure, and finding another label that's pretty much perfect and just. Peeking over at the abro label.

.

[usernamesarehard1]

Aroflux culture is struggling to know if you are just aroflux or compeltely abrosexual. Sometimes when my attraction to women drops I feel compeltely aromantic, and other times I start wondering if I could be attracted to men. The thing is, I don't know if I actually AM attracted to men or if I am just thinking it's possible because my attraction to women is lower.

I am just so confused.

[it-is-only-a-novel]

Our X experience blogs master post

There are a bunch of our-_-experince blogs that are totally awesome, and I haven't seen a master post yet. So here goes, in no particular order:

our-queer-experience

our-abinary-experience

our-nonbinary-experience

our-genderqueer-experience

our-genderfluid-experience

our-aroace-experience

our-transmasculine-experience

our-transfeminine-experience

@our-maverique-experience

@our-sapphic-experience

@transsexual-experiences

@our-bigender-experience

@our-genderflux-experience

@our-multigender-experience

@our-mspec-experience

@our-asexual-experience

@our-transhet-experience

@our-transgender-experiences

@our-xenogender-experience

@our-unlabelled-experience

@our-mlm-experience

@our-t4t-experience

@our-bisexual-experience

@our-aromantic-experience

@our-queerplatonic-experience

@our-demiboy-experience

@our-outherly-experience

@our-lgbtq-brazilian-experience

@our-questioning-experience

@our-abro-experience

@our-pansexual-experience

@our-afab-transfem-experience

@our-polyamorous-experience

@our-boyflux-experience

@our-voidpunk-experience

@our-agender-experience

@our-aplatonic-experience

@our-butch-experience

@our-futch-experience

@our-femme-experience

@our-androgyne-experience

@our-demigirl-experience

@our-loveless-experience

@our-gnc-experience

@our-gay-experience

@our-neurogender-experience

@our-lesbian-experience

@our-otherkin-experience

@our-amicus-experience

@our-fictionkin-experience

@our-ambiamorous-experience

@our-sapphillean-experience

@our-trans-youth-experience

@our-aspec-experience

@our-greyromantic-experience

@our-oriented-aroace-experience

@transfem-experience

I know I've missed some, and new ones will probably pop up. So tag them in the comments/reblogs, and I'll update the post.

I used this post to help me out.

There's a maximum amount of blogs I can tag. As more blogs are added I'll untag earlier ones and leave a link to them instead.

Update: 12/4/2024

I recommend you check that you're rebloging the most updated version.

[sapphic-boy]

Happy lesbian visibility week to all the lesser-visible lesbians, I'm talking about the mspec lesbians, the abro lesbians, the lesboys, the ftm lesbians, the gaybians, and any other lesbian who's validity is constantly questioned, you are all so strong and so powerful, keep on keepin' on, I love you!

[our-abro-experience]

hello, and welcome to our abro experience!!

i'm ash/rhylee!! you can use whichever name you like best

i use any and all pronouns (short psa about this at the bottom of the post). my identity is honestly very fluid- i considered for a time that i was genderfluid, but i'm probably abrogender. also abrosexual. idk man it's confusing

this blog is open to all of you who would like to share your abro experiences, ask questions, give answers or suggestions, and more!! i'm looking forward to meeting all of you!

abrogender describes gender fluidity in a way that is sort of similar to being genderfluid. if you're abrogender, your gender fluctuates in a way that is impossible to pin down, or you have so many tiny aspects to your gender that you're constantly discovering it.

abrosexual is the same idea as abrogender, except with your sexuality. someone who's abrosexual would find their sexual identity shifts often- they might identify with the term gay, and then might feel attracted to all genders, and then might not feel any attraction at all.

link to a person's explanation of their abrosexual identity

this blog was inspired by @our-queer-experience, @our-nonbinary-experience, @our-genderfluid-experience, @our-questioning-experience, @our-maverique-experience, and more

my other blog is @lappelduvide-thesevenumbrellas on which i mostly shitpost and reblog shitposts

ALRIGHT TIME TO EXPLAIN

when i say i want you to use any and all pronouns for me, i mean ANY AND ALL

THEY/THEM/THEIR

VEY/VEM/VAIR

SHE/HER, HE/HIM, XE/XEM

USE NEOPRONOUNS, MAKE UP PRONOUNS, I DON'T CARE

USE ALL PRONOUNS

[aspec-man-thing]

The customary every 6 months questioning if I'm actually a straight aro man... abro-aceflex can be so confusing and frustrating sometimes.

[genderstarbucks]

Mspeclesbian-Questioning is a term for individuals who are questioning if they're a lesbian or mspec.

Bilesbian-Questioning is a term for individuals who are questioning if they're a lesbian or bi(romantic, sexual, etc.)

Poly/plylesbian-Questioning is a term for individuals who are questioning if they're a lesbian or poly/ply(romantic, sexual, etc.)

Panlesbian-Questioning is a term for individuals who are questioning if they're a lesbian or pan(romantic, sexual, etc.)

Omnilesbian-Questioning is a term for individuals who are questioning if they're a lesbian or omni(romantic, sexual, etc.)

Abrolesbian-Questioning is a term for individuals who are questioning if they're a lesbian or abro(romantic, sexual, etc.)

[redactedx3]

[ID: the Abrosexual and bigender flags side by side, with flaming text "I am the LGBT" over both of them]

Based on a joke between my friends abt my needlessly complex orientation.

[ID: the Lesbigay and bigender flags side by side, with flaming text "I am the LGBT" over both of them]

Here's one for lesbigay (neopronouns' flag) also <3

(I lowkey prefer lesbigay to abro bc the SAM makes everything 10x more complicated for me lol.)

Here's the flaming text gif for ur gay needs

[DNI if you're gonna be mean, but questions are welcome]

[questioning-aspec-culture-is]

questioning aspec (abro implied) culture is going wild one day then looking back and thinking "what the hell was that"

<3

[bigayasuka]

Hi! I have a genuine question and I hope it isn’t offensive or anything. How can a lesbian be male? Doesnt being lesbian mean that you are a woman or feminine who only loves other women/feminine people? Wouldn’t a mspec lesbian be straight or would they be mlm? Who would they love? Thank you for your time and I hope I haven’t offended anyone with this question.

Great question anon! And dw you’re not being offensive at all ^^

It is true that most lesbians are strictly wlw, but the lesboy label is often used by

-lesbians who are both men and women

-genderfluid lesbians

-butch/gnc lesbians who consider themselves masc aligned

-trans men who identified as lesbians before coming out as men and still have a connection to lesbianism

Of course these aren’t the only reasons someone may id as a lesboy, but I’m not a lesboy myself, so you should ask one how they define themselves as a lesboy

As for mspec lesbians, some do consider themselves mlm and/or straight. Some reasons one may id as an mspec lesbian include

-being homosexual and multiromantic

-being homoromantic and multisexual

-being attracted to women and enbies while still being a lesbian

-being mspec with a preference for women

-using the label in a historical context (as in before lesbian separatism and political lesbians and all that jazz)

-having fluid/abro attraction

-being unsure if you’re mspec or a lesbian

Most “official” definitions include simply queer attraction to women, so even if you’re male aligned or still attracted to men, that can be considered lesbianism

[multigenderswag]

Multigender Survey Results Dec 2023: Orientation (part 1)

Overall data

Participants were asked “What is your orientation (sexual, romantic, tertiary, etc)?” (multiple selection). The options provided were:

Lesbian: 213 (28.7%)

Gay: 242 (32.6%)

Straight: 41 (5.5%)

Bi: 324 (43.6%)

Pan: 118 (15.9%)

Poly: 82 (11.0%)

Omni: 49 (6.6%)

Abro: 62 (8.3%)

Aromantic: 176 (23.7%)

Aromantic spectrum: 235 (31.6%)

Asexual: 169 (22.7%)

Asexual spectrum: 225 (30.3%)

Queer: 415 (55.9%)

Questioning: 59 (7.9%)

Unlabeled: 74 (10.0%)

A total of 446 participants (60.0%) identified as bi, pan, poly, omni, and/or mspec. 

Aspec

Of participants overall:

94 identified as aromantic and asexual (12.7%)

22 identified as aromantic and acespec (3.0%)

60 identified as aromantic and allosexual (8.1%)

46 identified as arospec and asexual (6.2%)

146 identified as arospec and acespec (19.7%)

43 identified as arospec and allosexual (5.8%)

29 identified as alloromantic and asexual (3.9%)

57 identified as alloromantic and acespec (7.7%)

246 identified as alloromantic and allosexual (33.1%)

In total

411 identified as aromantic or arospec (55.3%)

394 identified as asexual or acespec (53.0%)

497 identified as aromantic, arospec, asexual, and/or acespec (66.9%)

Of participants who identified as aromantic or arospec:

176 identified as aromantic (42.8%)

235 identified as elsewhere on the aromantic spectrum (57.2%)

94 identified as aromantic and asexual (22.9%)

22 identified as aromantic and acespec (5.4%)

60 identified as aromantic and allosexual (14.6%)

46 identified as arospec and asexual (11.2%)

146 identified as arospec and acespec (35.5%)

43 identified as arospec and allosexual (10.5%)

Of participants who identified as asexual or acespec:

169 identified as asexual (42.9%)

225 identified as elsewhere on the asexual spectrum (57.1%)

94 identified as asexual and aromantic (23.9%)

46 identified as asexual and arospec (11.7%)

29 identified as asexual and alloromantic (7.4%)

22 identified as acespec and aromantic (5.6%)

146 identified as acespec and arospec (37.1%)

57 identified as acespec and alloromantic (14.5%)

[coexistentialism]

hiya!! i've been questioning if i may be plural for probably a few years on & off now. it's. a really confusing experience. i'm not sure i'll ever be certain of what i'm dealing with. there's so many obstacles. all i can do is hope i'll find some clarity sooner or later

but i just wanted to let u know that i stumbled upon ur post that happened to crop up on my feed about when ur alters aren't Distinct People, and i'm glad i read it, because that post alone resonated with me more than any other post i've seen. i felt seen

a lot of our experiences are really similar based off of what you've described! at my core, i don't really feel like anyone or anything. i mask and pretend a lot & i've hardly ever felt comfortable expressing myself. everything always feels. Wrong. i have different identities too, but it feels more like i'm playing a role than actually being an entirely new person? i'm still always present. i'm still always conscious of what's happening. i'm still very much in control. but the way i feel, my identity & my perception shifts. suddenly i connect more with other names and pronouns and orientations. suddenly i feel i should switch my personality and style to better suit me. suddenly i start to lean more towards different aesthetics and sometimes i'll have different impulses. different things that feel more Me as opposed to before

the thing is that i'm still here. always. using "i" loosely throughout all of this because i honestly don't know who i am & where i start and end, but. i act more or less the same—especially around other people and when masking—but i feel. different. i don't black out and i don't feel a very distinct, solid sense of who i am ever. and these identities aren't really consistent. most of the time it feels like they've just kind of disappeared entirely & won't return. i can't communicate with any of them and don't have a headspace

so i often feel like this experience makes me Not A Singlet but i also feel like i don't belong in this community. i feel like i'm trapped in a grey area. i can't tell if i have DID or if i'm just an abro genderfluid personality shifting littol creacher or if i'm. Faking or tricking myself into believing something i'm not??? safe to say it's super frustrating and weird. i always feel so alienated but!! positivity: reading ur post made me feel secure again, it feels soso comforting to find something i can relate to ^_^

excuse all of my rambling but i want u to feel that relatability and that belonging too. it's invaluable, especially for those with DID & dissociative disorders. i wish u the best. i hope u continue to make progress with urself—all of u individually—and ur system as a whole. know that u are never alone and ur experience with DID is as real as any other.

and i hope lots of other people will feel the same way. i hope, and i'm sure, lots of people read your posts and feel at home. like someone really gets it. sorry for all of my waffling but! genuinely! thank u taking the time to write ur posts, share ur experiences & for being here :3

YEAH YOU GET IT! I don't really have anything to add, but you get it! I'm glad my post helped you and made you feel seen :] And this is all so nice, I appreciate it so much :,D

[sapphic-boy]

questioned if i was bi or a lesbian for YEARS until it hit me that my attraction to men comes and goes and that thats what abro means and it was a real

situation