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#and asking my brother who this fits
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Monoma: you see, calcium oxide has oxygen in it and that makes sense, because it has oxide in the name.
Monoma: you know what doesn't have oxygen in the name? Calcium sulfate. But you know what's in it? OXYGEN
Momo: don't worry, you don't have bitch in your name, but your personality is still pretty bitchy
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sketchyspirit · 1 year
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𝕿𝖍𝖊 𝖘𝖚𝖓 𝖘𝖍𝖎𝖓𝖊𝖘 𝖙𝖍𝖗𝖔𝖚𝖌𝖍 𝖒𝖞 𝖊𝖞𝖊𝖘
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𝖄𝖔𝖚𝖗 𝖌𝖗𝖊𝖆𝖙𝖓𝖊𝖘𝖘 𝖒𝖆𝖐𝖊𝖘 𝖒𝖊 𝖗𝖊𝖛𝖊𝖗𝖊𝖓𝖙  
𝖄𝖔𝖚 𝖜𝖎𝖑𝖑 𝖇𝖊 𝖒𝖞 𝖕𝖚𝖓𝖎𝖘𝖍𝖒𝖊𝖓𝖙
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please reblog, I paint for the # comments  
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moeblob · 4 months
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New OCs
(briefly, humans and supernatural beings have to team up for building better relations with each other and all the supernaturals can shapeshift and take on human appearances but also have their 'original form'.)
OK so I was GOING to draw fanart today - I had a fun idea and everything! But health anxiety (and anti-anxiety meds) wore me out so I kinda .... slogged through OCs as a treat to me. I am going to go to the doctor tomorrow so HOPEFULLY it's all okay.
#my characters#also kite is the worst socially and says things he thinks are surely fitting for a human conversation#but ends up insulting grady with 99% of the comments and that makes grady not fond of him#but then grady is like super pleasant to others and doesnt know how to act around kite and flubs a lot too#its a disaster and the twins are like oh no this is painful#mr tengu that was so tacky you cant say that to a human#mr tengu you cant DO that to a human STOP BEING LIKE THIS#while callum is just like wow this is hilarious thanks for bothering my younger brother its adding character to his life#and kite is stressed because thats the least encouraging thing to hear ever thank you v much hes TRYING to adapt#but also kite isnt his real name and he doesnt know squat about humans BUT he knows they have the internet#and so hes like well the problem is i dont want to actually say my name to you all because what if i am Online (TM)#and so he asks for a new name and then is like he should name me - the tiny one who wants to kick my ass should name me#so grady is like ....... nooooo...... dont............ and then suggests kite bc he's done google research#and kite is a type of bird and according to wikipedia has some familiarity to tengu so therefore yeah#and kite is like !!!!!! DOES HE ! KNOW THINGS ! and happily accepts the slightly researched name while the other humans#are like grady stop that is bullying the poor guy leave him alone pick a normal name!#anyway not drawn yet but there is a human guy partner for the twins and he immediately is like perfect#i know which is which lets go out and explore the human world for your research#and they dont understand how he knows them apart so fast and none of the other humans seem to tell em apart#but then none of the humans are shocked at the guy who knows so the girls are like sir howst do you know#and hes just v casual oh right yeah younger identical twin sisters - i have Practice ! and they are endeared to him haha#anyway if you read all those tags ty#and yes in his tengu form he does actually have the long nose please do not be mad#i just dont draw noses normally and im too tired to practice rn so#i only drew the second one today anyway - the first pic was done a couple days ago but i didnt wanna post on main#but then here i am posting on main#im sorry
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snikt111 · 7 days
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hi hi hi hi I found out about Hal Jordan TODAY and am going so autistic over him it’s insane can you please give me a rundown on what his deal is I think you’re the Tumblr Green Lantern guy
omg hi, insane compliment btw, tysm! i'm glad to give you a rundown!! also definitely check out @katmaatui for more hal info, red is SUPER knowledgable abt him. @rillette, @catboyollie, @halcarols, @starsapphire and @yellowcorps (along with so many others that i cant think to tag off the top of my head) have some great hal takes too! (edited the post just to tag more ppl)
apologies if this is a bit rushed/messy, i'm doing this while i smelt stone in minecraft LMAO
that being said... i think this will be a long one, so more below the cut :3
(cw for light mentions of pedophilia, abuse, canon typical violence)
okay, so hal jordan is the first human green lantern of the GREEN LANTERN CORPS. it's important to note that there was technically a human green lantern before him (alan scott, originally from earth two/the justice society, but integrated into main DC canon after crisis), but his power comes from a different source- which is a whole different ballpark that would take ages to explain, lol, so i'll move on from that.
hal was originally introduced in a showcase issue in 1959, but ended up getting a solo run in the mid 60s because of his showcase issues doing well. he's been a test pilot, middle brother, compassionate, rule follower (although being surprisingly liberal for the time) with an interesting relationship with star sapphire carol ferris since those first appearances. for the first 20 odd years of his appearances we had no information on his parents, but we got a lot from other family members, such as uncle titus, cousin hal jr (aka airwave), younger brother jim jordan and older brother jack jordan. through the 60s and 70s those members of his family were developed along with him; with the audience learning that jim's wife sue thought jim was green lantern, rather than hal, and hal himself training his cousin, hal jr.
the most known version of how hal got the ring in the first place is probably based off of geoff john's rewrite in the mid 00s, reiterating the original story of abin sur crashing onto earth and dying, leaving hal with his ring to be trained by sinestro and the rest of the glc, while also changing miniscule details that had been developed in emerald dawn 1 & 2 (which was released in the 90s, more on that later). the main premise of abin sur's crash has stayed the same, but the story around hal's current life, job, family and stability keep changing. for instance, the original comic with abin sur in showcase only showed hal getting the ring, the guardians choosing him. the first rewrite i can think of was emerald dawn volume 1, published in 1989 and continued in emerald dawn v2 (1991). here we get the classic hal watches his father die in a plane crash with carol ferris beside him as a pre adolescent, and some of the biggest implications of the mistreatment from his father. we also get introduced to hal, despite his stick to the rules, straight edge attitude, making some serious mistakes and putting people in danger and even death- with the implication of alcohol abuse. the audience HAS known hal used to be in the air force since sometime in the late 60s or early 70s (sorry, i don't remember the exact issue!), but emerald dawn shows us that hal's moved on from the air force and into test piloting, and that his mother keeps having to bail him out for making mistakes. emerald dawn vol 1 shows the abin sur moment, followed by fights that cost hal's friends life, and is followed up by sinestro training hal in emerald dawn vol 2, where we get to see the iconic scenes of hal finding out about sinestro and his... dictatorship.
along with that; how the guardians and rings are treated and hal and the glc's perception of them is vastly changed over time. in the early days of gl in the 60s, the guardians were really never to be seen. hal was repeatedly summoned to them and then had his memory almost fully wiped- only leaving a vague notion of his orders. the guardian's called hal to them at seemingly the worst times, ending up with him almost getting injured, getting in trouble at work, and even ending up jobless and homeless. the chaos of being a green lantern has been around the WHOLE time, but originally, the green lanterns didnt really... fight it. the guardian's were their masters (and even father figures, to hal) and not to be questioned. the rings in the 60s were also much more powerful, despite the yellow weakness (the yellow weakness is the notion that from about the 60s to the mid 90s the green lantern rings were completely unable to be used against anything yellow). time travel, phasing, teleporting, etc were all very viable and common things- as well as forceful shapeshifting, invisibility, mind control, mind reading, etc etc. these days, writers have dampened these powers down to mostly shooting light and constructs.
okay, it's parallax time. the emerald twilight arc from the mid 90s wasn't an arc that was as thoroughly planned out over a long period of time as it probably should have been. a lot of fans at the time (and even now) hated what happened there, and claimed it ruined hal's character entirely. i can understand why! but, at it's core, the parallax arc is a story about a broken man pushed to the limit, fully grieving his home and family (originally, he lost his brother jim in the destruction of coast city, along with a lot of other family members) and being goddamn fed up with how his "masters" treated him and the rest of the corps. the so called "perfect lantern" (no, he wasn't that much of a rebel, despite what johns wants you to think) snapped and essentially tried to gain as much power as he could to bring back coast city. when the guardians stripped him of his powers so he couldn't, hal became enraged and took down every lantern in his path, just to get to the guardians and that power. long story short, he kills the guardians and absorbs all the energy from the central power battery on oa, becoming parallax- essentially a god. this marks the start of zero hour, an event made by dc to restructure and reset; giving the comics a new generation of heroes. hal destroys the world and remakes it, but is ultimately taken down by kyle rayner, the new green lantern, with the help of the jla, jsa and associates. there are a few more run ins with parallax after this, before kyle convinces parallax/hal that he can make up for all of this by reigniting the sun after it went out- aka killing himself. hal does it, is stuck in limbo for awhile and then becomes the spectre to continue to make up for the horrible things he did as parallax. the spectre is the spirit of god's wrath and vengeance, a weapon used to drag sinners to their very own, self made hells, and scare the shit out of people. the spectre, from it's very first appearance, is a ghost like spirit that takes on a host, and is primarily described using christian terms and is used in a very... christian ideology. HOWEVER, the spectre 2001 confirms that hal is jewish (jewish mom, catholic dad) and that belief system, plus his personality as a whole, literally makes him change the spirit of vengeance into the spirit of redemption, for at least as long as they are bonded. the whole parallax to spectre arc is about grief, pain, cycles of abuse and terror, redemption and guilt. it is NOT about a fear bug that possess hal. (im so serious though, the spectre 2001 is one of the best comics ive ever read. amazing. changed my world view) but... geoff johns changed all of it, decanonized the spectre, and ruined the legacy of parallax and hal's growth as a person by releasing green lantern: rebirth in 2004/2005. this retcons hal's breakdown and journey through grief into him BEING POSSESSED BY AN ENTITY CONTROLLED BY SINESTRO THAT FULLY CHANGES PREVIOUS GREEN LANTERN CANON AND IMPLICATIONS. also, fucks up the importance of kyle becoming ion, but whatever. geoff johns writes hal (and even more so, carol) so very wrong, and change their stories so vastly in ways that go against the stories very meanings.
SIGH.
now... time to get started on some rougher stuff. hal jordan misconceptions. i'm saving that arc for last.
- hal jordan wasn't much of a rule breaker or rebel until the 70s/80s, where he BEGAN (very slowly, mind you) to be radicalized by oliver queen during denny o'neil's green lantern/green arrow. hal was painted as more of a conservative during this period (which, admittedly, kind of goes against previous canon... he's always been relatively central to liberal, not to any extremes like ollie though, lol) but gets more and more understanding of how power structures work and how lower classes are mistreated during this time- which ends up opening his eyes a bit to how shitty the guardians are. (this is helped by the guardians literally just. leaving. the green lanterns and kind of disbanding them so they can go fuck the zamarons, lmao). geoff johns tried to change this narrative into making hal a very... maverick-from-top-gun type of character, who punched his way out of the military (when, in reality, the original story during emerald knights in the late 90s was that hal had been framed for stealing a jet and was dishonorably discharged, which he took the punishment for because he knew someone had to) and hits on women constantly and gets ladies and allat (which, funnily enough hal was awful at getting carol to like him for a long time, since carol fell for green lantern rather than hal. not to mention the awkwardness of carol's proposals or hal's many, many failed relationships). hal has always been insecure and lowkey boyfailure, he is NOT a top gun maverick tom cruise sorta guy! fuck you jeremy adams!
- hes not that much of an idiot asshole. hal can be a real dick, he's had that going for him since the beginning, but he isn't what you read in batfam fics. he's not stupid and shouldn't be the laughingstock of the justice league. i assume this idea started from the obsession with batfam and the fact that the jla has quite the history of ignoring hal and his issues (as well as. all of their issues. theyre not so great at work life balance), but it's gone too far. hal isn't making fun of the robins and pissing bruce off bc of that. hal isnt fooling around on the job 24/7 (he takes being a gl and pilot VERY seriously, although he does enjoy some danger and high stakes) or slacking off to get girls. again. not top gun maverick.
- hal has not been a creep since the beginnings. hal was not weird with carol in the 60s. things were weird between them, yeah, but that's based off circumstance and the craziness of star sapphire and green lantern. he was NOT being horribly sleazy! i hate that i even need to say this, but i see this take too much not to
- going off of what was said above, lets discuss the arisia arc. if you want to be a real hal fan, this is unfortunately something you need to know about. in action comics, after crisis and the guardians left to go fuck the zamarons, most of the green lanterns fell apart and seperated. a small group went to earth- led by hal and consisting of hal, john stewart, katma tui, kilowog, salaakk, ch'p and arisia rrab. (also sometimes guy gardner, but that's complicated) previously to this arc, hal treated 14 year old arisia like a beloved little sister, welcoming her and leading her into the corps just like everyone else. things started to change once the timeline gets closer and closer to crisis, where arisia starts showing that she has a crush on hal (who is roughly 30s at this point). any advances made by arisia are shut down by hal at the beginning, because she's a child. now, it's unfortunately a common thing to just call hal a "pedophile" because of what happens in this arc- but it really isn't that simple. still weird and icky, but definitely not to the degree of which some fans like to act like it is- esp to attack hal fans for, which is... an odd choice regarding how many fucked up things every character (esp male characters) did back in the day. arisia ends up using her power ring to artifically age herself up, making her body AND MIND into that of a young adult (the comic makes this very clear). once this happens... hal stops rejecting her. they get together, they kiss. the only person in the group of green latnerns who actually has an issue with it is john (salaakk is meh about it, but he just doesn't like human-esque romance no matter what), and katma even directly encourages their relationship. kilowog ends up crushing on arisia as well, and guy gardner hits on her repeatedly throughout the whole period. eventually, hal and arisia break up, but this legacy (thank so much englehart, for wrtiting this. /sarc) is a big controversy among the comics crowd. "is hal jordan a predator?" personally, and i know a lot of friends/mutuals/other gl fans choose to erase the arisia arc entirely (versus how canon ended up retconning it to be 14 earth years is equal to that of an adult and she didn't really get super ages up, or whatever) and go with the familial relationship between hal and her. that's my preferred version! i know red (@katmaatui) has explored that version as well as an alternate version where the arisia arc did happen, and how it affects arisia in particular, which is really depressing but super interesting. anyway, it's complicated and weird and nuanced, but that whole occurence doesn't mean hal's a bad character or person (cause yk. retcons) and it's certainly not bad to like his character. (definitely ignore any guy gardner fans who try to bitch about this arc. cough cough. guy was ALSO into her and hit on her repeatedly. smfh) most people who bring this up to demonize fans didn't even read the arc, and don't know the nuance or the other weird shit that happens in it. (hal is not a horse, sigh)
OVERALL NOTES!
hal jordan is a super complicated character with an extensive history spanning from the 60s to his worse written appearances in modern age. it's okay to like any version of the character, but it is important to note the changes that have been made, the storylines butchered and lost, and more. he has quite the legacy, and he's particularly interesting as from a moral standpoint. hal's a real sweetie though, when it gets down to it! he's neurodivergent coded (imo at least.. his dad very much gets onto him for being disrtracted, hes kinda shit at social interaction (and then amazing at it the other half of the time) etc etc. "spacecase") and his dad is an abusive asshole, who he desperately doesnt want to be like but thinks he NEEDS to be like!
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tiffanybluesclues · 5 days
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Every week someone makes a post about how annoying it is that Dick Grayson fans don't acknowledge his flaws, and every week someone replies with an explanation that the flaws OP listed are entirely fanon and inconsistent with canon as it actually happened and at this point I have to assume that none of those explanations are ever going to stick because clearly some people just want the fanon to be true.
Anyway, I'm just putting this here for me to edit and add relevant-to-the-topic links later so I'll have them nicely at hand to read and sooth my frustrations when it gets real bad out there. (Echo chambers are good when we use them to drown out character mischaracterizing fanon.)
#dick grayson#canon vs fanon#yes this is about 'dick was a bad brother to jason' yet again#😮‍💨#super problematic how dick didn't pack up his life & become a devoted big brother to the new son of a man who had already disowned dick#like in-universe he is respectfully supportive of the kid who's wearing his name and uniform#but he was also a 19 year old living in a different city and not given any indication that he was a member of bruce's family so...?#dc comics#this fanon tendency to try to cram nuclear family dynamics and angst onto relationships that do not fit that mold arghhh#add to that how real-world knowledge makes it extra ridiculous to act as if 'omg dick was such a jerk for not being there for jason!!!'#yes their interactions were minimal - I'm pretty sure that keeping dick as a titans character was the entire reason jason existed!#let's be real about jason: his character & what led to him being robin were completely different pre-crisis + his post-crisis run was brief#understandably there are 'flashback' stories to flesh out his time as robin. the worst of these disregard characterization from that time#but even with flashbacks the worst that canon actually shows would be that they weren't close? which...okay?#idk what kind of expectations some people have for the former-ward so sort of foster kid who was explicitly kicked out of bruce wayne's lif#apparently he should've 1) begged his former guardian to acknowledge him as family & 2) assumed the role of bestest big brother either way#i'd ask people to stop and really think about the 'family' structure that existed in this time period where they insist dick was the bad gu#but at this point it's clear that people who want him to be the bad guy truly don't care about why we think it's absurd#anyway i'll end this with a reminder of what I'm pretty sure were the ages etc of the parties involved:#jason (12) gotham. adopted son of bruce.#dick (19) nyc. former ward of bruce. fired from role as partner to batman.#bruce (30+) gotham. raised dick as his ward → fired dick as a partner → never indicated dick still had any place in his life → adopted jaso#oh so my tags just cutting off the final letter like that? i will not be correcting them 😡
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softquietsteadylove · 8 months
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Hi can you write a full on pregnancy journey between thenamesh and the eternals find out about it as well and gilgamesh is helping thena through giving birth
By all odds, Eternals cannot reproduce. It's not in their physical makeup--they're not organic beings. But there are timelines, and universes, and powers beyond mortality. The Elemental Eternal is proof of that. With her evolution comes exceptions.
She doesn't turn the Illusionist Eternal human, she returns life to the Strongest. And with his renewed life, came an unprecedented circumstance.
The Warrior Eternal became pregnant.
Without Ajak's guidance, they only had so much insight. Phastos performed every scan and test, Druig assessed what he could at the subconscious level, Sprite even tried constructing an early image of the fetus in a sort of ultrasound. Kingo proclaimed to have knowledge from playing a doctor - once - but was denied acknowledgement.
But none of them knew how to bring an immortal life into the world--or if it would, in fact, be immortal at all.
Sersi had brought her sister's dearest love back to life, forsaking even her own loved one. Thena, upon hearing the news of her new role in life, had grasped Sersi's hand. The Alchemist was confused until she saw the tears in her sister's eyes, whispering, "I'm sorry, I know how much you wanted this."
Sersi burst into tears, wrapping her arms around Thena's shoulders. She had always dreamed of transmuting life in its rawest sense. In this way, she somewhat felt that she had.
So, with the family of Eternals with only themselves, they embarked on raising this new form of 'life'.
Sersi was the only one who even remotely knew what to expect. She told what she knew, did further research. Phastos and Makkari concentrated on reading every material the human world - and beyond - had to offer. Druig was quietly attentive, never admitting to concern but always hovering nearby and commenting on if Thena or the budding consciousness she was harbouring desired something.
Gilgamesh was beside himself.
For all the years upon centuries upon millennia he had spent by Thena's side, they had never had to consider this a possibility for them. And while he usually had the typical minutia to worry about - Thena's general well being, health, Mahd Wy'ry - he now had a whole other set of problems.
He was beside her every second, reluctant to so much as look away from her and their child. Everyone told him he was being excessive, including Thena herself. But he refused to leave her again. He promised her as much, anyway. He stayed close, made sure they both knew he was there.
He cooked nutritious meals, made sure they got their rest. He was a little more insistent with his brothers and sisters than they were used to. Either he was asking Phastos and Makkari for what they had read about pregnancy or he was asking Druig how the baby 'felt'.
He asked Sprite for illusion 'ultrasounds' so often that she eventually stopped obliging him, saying that unless Thena asked, she was no longer their ultrasound machine.
Sersi threw herself into tending to Thena, and their child to whom she would be a second mother if anything happened to Thena. Sersi attempted to forbid her from saying such things, but Thena said that she had heard of such practices before, and if it had to be anyone, it could be no one but Sersi.
Phastos had complained that he had an actual child, and that Jack was even fond of Thena (for some reason) and vice versa! Thena said that yes, she was very fond of Jack too. But he and Ben would have their hands full with their human child, no less whatever immortal creature she spawned (her own words).
"Are you sure about this?" she could remember Gilgamesh asking her about halfway through. It was nowhere near the normal number of months for a human gestation, but they had to assume that their advanced cell strength and regeneration was translating into the growth of the baby.
"It is far too late to ask that," she answered, her hands on her stomach, swollen to accommodate their child.
"I mean," he shifted, taking hold of her hand next to the bed she nearly constantly occupied. Although she denied it, she had to all but be on bed rest, supplying the baby with not only her Cosmic Energy but much of her physical energy as well. "We don't have any experience in this--none of us. Are we sure we can get through this?"
Thena looked up at the ceiling, seriously considering the reality of their situation, and the question related. She patted her stomach, a subconscious motion she had taken on in the last two weeks. "Yes."
Gilgamesh chuckled, kissing her hand, "that easy, huh?"
"Hm," she smiled, relishing the small but heavy affection. "It will in no way be easy. But we can do this, is what I'm saying."
He sighed, tilting his head at her, "you'll be doing the hard part. I can be here as much as I can, but there's nothing I can do for the pain of what you'll go through."
None of them had any concept of what it would mean to give birth.
Thena let him moved the back of her hand to his cheek, always cooler to the cheek than his warmer skin. "I have no fear."
"I know you don't," he lamented more than complimented, "but maybe, just this once-"
"Gilgamesh," she said softly, pulling his eyes to hers. Her still and unwavering eyes, "I do not fear this. I will endure anything to bring this being to life."
Gil's eyes watered, "I don't want you to have to."
"Be that as it may," she soothed, moving her palm to his cheek, "I choose to allow this life shelter within me, and I have already decided that it is this life that takes precedence now--over my own, over anything else."
He shook his head, "Thena-"
"I'm sorry."
He blinked through his tears, although Thena's always became glassy.
"I have experienced living without you," she admitted, her throat tight with the difficulty of such words, "no matter how brief. I know that I am asking something unbearable of you."
Gilgamesh buried his burning eyes within the warmth of her palm.
"But the young one comes first, before all else," she insisted. She brushed his tears away and forced his eyes back to hers, "swear to me."
He nodded, unable to say it just yet. To speak such an unthinkable thing was too much for him. He had only just died and come back to life within the same twelve months. And now life threatened to both give him the greatest gift and take away his greatest treasure?
"I will be with you," she promised, rubbing her belly with her free hand again, "in a way."
That was the last they had spoken of the potential worst possibility.
The birth was hard. It took all their resources to keep everyone calm, let alone actually help with the process. Makkari and Sersi did their best, Sprite insisting that she couldn't possibly stomach the reality of what was happening. She could be heard whispering to Kingo the fear that they would lose Thena this time.
Phastos kept an eye on Thena's health, although the actual act of birth had taken more strength from the Warrior Eternal than they ever could have anticipated. All the equipment at their disposal was just barely keeping her conscious as her body prepared to, in a way, deliver its own form of Celestial.
"Thena, come on, just stay with me," Gilgamesh would whisper, his lips always close to her skin, her hair, something. He held her hand, which would have broken with her efforts were it not for his exoskeleton.
She stared upward, delirious from her efforts, her pulse thready and her skin covered in a cold sweat. "When?"
"Almost there, Thena," Sersi promised on her sister's other side, dabbing her flushed skin, "I promise, just a little more."
Makkari waved, it's time!
"Come on, Thena, one more deep breath," Sersi pleaded, squeezing her shoulders as Makkari got into position.
"Almost there," Gil whispered to her, "then you can hold our baby."
Thena's pupils widened. The baby.
A shrill cry broke the air. Breath was held as Makkari held the tiny life, washing it off and wrapping it up as Sersi had told her. There was no 'cord', like Sersi had told her, but she watched as a golden thread of energy dissolved into the air. She tilted her head.
There's no belly button, Makkari shrugged, as if that were all that significant a detail. But other than that, she's beautiful.
Sersi's eyes lit, "she?"
Makkari shrugged again but smiled as she handed the baby over to Sersi first, I guess--looks an awful lot like Thena not to be.
Sersi blinked through her tears; it was true, the little bundle looked like a tiny Thena, even with wisps of the same sun glow hair.
"Sersi," Thena struggled just to lift her arms, "please."
"Here," she whispered, leaning down carefully and depositing the baby into Thena's arms and over her lap. "Look at her, Thena, she's perfect."
"Perfect," Gilgamesh whispered, gazing upon a child of his own. He had always gotten along with human kids, maybe even gotten attached to a select few, like Jack, or Odin's little pup once upon a time. But this--this was entirely different.
"Oh," Thena blinked, her voice unmistakably melted and sweet. She smiled, "she has your eyes."
Indeed, the little one blinked and had massive, warm brown eyes, like the Strongest Eternal himself. She looked up at Thena, and then over at her father, who only dissolved further.
"Hello little one," Gilgamesh whispered, as if even his voice would be too much for his new treasure to bear. He offered his finger to her itty-bitty hand.
She was already capable of a strong grip.
"She incredible," Sersi whispered to her sister, pressing her lips to Thena's hair. "What will you name her?"
Thena gazed at her child.
Makkari and Phastos also looked over amidst the work of making sure Thena was stable and going to fetch the others.
"Olympia has always been home in our minds," Thena spoke gently, "even though there is no such thing. And yet when I say it, I still think of home--the same feeling I get when I think of Australia."
Gilgamesh leaned over, pressing a kiss to her temple.
"There shall be an Olympia," Thena declared, her eyes meeting that of her child, already so wise. "You shall be the meaning of home now, little one."
"Olympia!" Sersi gasped.
Thena looked up at her, "you are crying even more than Gilgamesh."
"So?" Sersi sniffled, barely able to see through her tears at all.
Thena let Gilgamesh take Olympia from her arms, just enough for her to recline in the bed more. "Let them in, they should meet her."
"Oi Sis!--you-"
Gil glared at the doorway, "keep your voice down."
Druig clapped his jaw shut, his teeth clacking loudly.
Kingo chuckled, for once, the most tactful of their chaotic little family. He strode in, Sprite clinging to him nervously. He smiled at Thena, "you made it."
She smiled back at her most opposite but undeniably dear brother. "You did too."
Gilgamesh tilted the bundle in his arms, although he obviously wouldn't be letting anyone else try holding her just yet. "This is Olympia."
Kingo smiled still, as if having anticipated the name that was preinstalled in all their heads. "She's beautiful, you guys."
"Gilgamesh," Thena spoke up from the bed, but he shook his head, already knowing what she was going to ask of him. He turned away, leaning over his bundle of joy. She let out a faint laugh as Kingo made his way to her bedside, "you'll have to hold her later."
He allowed the selfishness, "I think he's earned the right to hog her for a little."
"Oi sis," Druig greeted all the same, although in a whisper as he scurried over to her other wide with Makkari and Sersi. "How you doin'?"
She was still smiling, elated to be on the other side of her trauma, no matter how beautiful. She let her brother pat her shoulder, "I have experienced worse...I think."
Druig snorted, "well, for what it's worth, I've never considered you tougher."
Thena looked over to where Gilgamesh was protectively huddling over Olympia, protecting her from her own Uncles and Aunts. She puffed through her nose faintly, "if you can get close enough, take a look at her. See what she's thinking."
Druig regarded the baby curiously. Even after heading a commune for two hundred years, he had never met a baby quite like this. He waved his hand vaguely in her direction.
Warmth
Makkari rubbed his back as he swiped at his eyes. Different, huh?
He nodded, slinging his arm lazily around her shoulders. They deserve this.
Makkari watched as Gilgamesh returned to Thena's side, still refusing to let Kingo and Phastos so much as tickle Olympia's cheeks. They do.
"Come on," Sprite grumbled, choosing instead to go over to Thena's side instead of crowding the baby and baby holder.
Thena looked at her youngest - most tentative - sister. "So?--what do you think?"
Sprite pursed her lips petulantly. She eyed Olympia, and her crowd of admirers. She tilted her head, "she's prettier than I imagined."
Thena took neither offense nor humour, but smiled. "You can meet her when you're ready."
And she did. Sprite warmed to the little life, just as she did to rejoining Kingo and even the human Karun instead of the isolation of secrecy.
Kingo and Phastos easily became the most eager to dote on their new little Eternal, although Gilgamesh insisted that he be the only apple of her eye. Druig managed to sneak into her good graces, with Thena's help getting past Gilgamesh's defenses.
Gilgamesh still barely leaves her side, even months after her birth. Despite her short gestation, she seems to age according to the Earth's rotation, as far as Phastos can test.
"Ajak would have loved you," Thena whispers down to the child sleeping in her arms. Whenever she lacks sleep, she does this--walks the halls of the Domo with Olympia for comfort. Her grey robes swish around her as she takes a seat in the awakening chamber. "She would still be crying even now, I'm sure."
Olympia sleeps as soundly as her father does. Apparently this is odd for a baby, which Thena doesn't think makes sense; they need sleep, so why would they be unable to achieve it?
Thena looks up at the looming statue of Arishem. "He has done me no kindnesses. If anything, he has cursed me in many ways."
Olympia doesn't mind. She has no awareness of her mother's ailment, and with the presence of their family to help, she will never witness the uglier consequences either.
Thena smiles down at the little one, though, "but I have you. And I will endure any curse for that."
She looks up at Arishem again. "Not that he had any part in that. If anyone game me you, besides your father, it is in fact godmother Sersi."
Olympia remains unbothered.
Thena presses a kiss to her tiny head, growing more white-blonde hair by the day. "You will learn in time. I will make sure you know of Ajak. And that you never know of Ikaris."
She dislikes even uttering his name in her child's presence.
Not that Olympia minds that either.
"Shouldn't you be in bed?"
She smiles as Gilgamesh rounds the corner, his grey robes also swaying in the ambient air of the ship. "I wanted to walk."
He comes over to her, checking on their little sunburst and then her. "Come back to bed. I'll hold her if want to look at her while you fall asleep."
She lays her head against his shoulder, "perfect."
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helianthus21 · 1 year
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for the Early Adoption/Always Brothers AU ✨ following @nalivaa's idea that Han-seo was introduced to the Jang household earlier in this one so a younger, even less patient Han-seok decided he was just Not Gonna deal with a whole stupid toddler so he dropped him of at an orphanage (where Vincenzo found him<3 (there's a lot of details that don't,,, make sense so just posting on tumblr for now)
When Han-seo was dropped off at the orphanage, Vincenzo had already been there for a while.
The weeks, months, years had bled away his hope that his mother would ever come back for him, and the realization had poured like molten lava around his heart and, hardening, turned it to stone. Since then, he had kept to himself, glaring away every well-meaning kid that approached him with doe-eyes, kept everyone at arm's length because he hated the world, he hated his mom, he hated himself.
Other kids came and went.
Kids with similar fates as Vincenzo’s. Kids without parents. Kids who were all alone in the world. Kids who were angry like him, empty like him, lonely and lost. 
But Vincenzo didn’t care about their fates. Because nobody cared about Vincenzo’s either. 
Because most of the kids here, Vincenzo found, were here because their parents had died, and not because their mom dropped them off somewhere only to never show up again.
Kids left and came. Some ran away. Some got adopted, by young couples, rich couples, middle-aged couples. Couples whose gazes drifted right over Vincenzo because Vincenzo wanted them to. His mom hadn’t wanted him, and so Vincenzo didn’t want anybody else either.
Mostly, Vincenzo never even learned the names of the new kids. They’d be gone soon anyway, and their stories were all the same. So when a young boy walked right into the orphanage one day, an even smaller boy tucked in his arms, Vincenzo didn’t even lift his head from the little figure of a bird he’d been carving from a chunk of wood while everybody else was out on a field trip.
“Stop crying,” said the boy. It’s possible he’d been saying more to the younger before that, but it was the sudden sharpness in his tone that made Vincenzo prick up his ears.
Turning his head slightly, he chanced a glance at the pair. The older of the two looked younger still than Vincenzo, and what was strange about him was that he was dressed very formally: instead of streetwear, he was wearing one of those little suits for kids that Vincenzo had worn only once, when his mom had made him attend the funeral of his grandfather. Back then, Vincenzo had found it very confining, the suit. He’d kept pulling at his sleeves and his collar, but this boy seemed to feel right at home in his clothes, confident even.
The other boy, the smaller boy, was indeed crying. Vincenzo must have simply blocked it out before.
“You’re just useless, you know? Stupid,” continued the boy in a voice that was in stark contrast to the words he spoke. The sharpness gone, it was like he was just stating a simple fact, like water is wet, the sky is blue. “Stop crying,” he said again. “Nobody wants you anyway. So this is the best for everyone, you see?”
Between the sobbing, the boy hiccuped, “H-hyung.”
The older boy, the brother, as Vincenzo assumed now, slammed his fist on the table, right next to where he had placed the younger. “Cut that out!” The venom was back in his voice. “I’m not your brother! We’re nothing, not even by half from now on. Got it? Bye forever.” 
Vincenzo looked around. None of the adults were in the room at that hour, just old man Don who was too drunk most of the time to notice what was going on in the world around him. 
There was no one there to witness how another little boy was abandoned at the very same orphanage. No one to witness his fate, the beginning of his story, except for Vincenzo. 
Vincenzo, who watched the older brother walk past him, out of the orphanage without a single glance back, looking much lighter now, like a burden had been lifted from him. 
And the little boy continued sobbing. 
Vincenzo abandoned his woodwork and stepped closer to the table. The other boy had pushed a chair to the table and climbed onto it to be able to place his brother there, but Vincenzo could reach it without any help. He had a round face, the boy, red from all the screaming, with puffed cheeks that made him almost look cute, and head full of dark hair, curling slightly behind his ears. He, too, was wearing a little suit, and Vincenzo wondered if they had indeed been at a funeral. Looking at the boy now, he couldn’t be much older than 2 years. Maybe less. 
"Nobody wants you, huh?" 
The moment he spoke up, the boy stopped crying. 
Not because all his tears were dried up, Vincenzo guessed, but rather because listening to Vincenzo seemed to take up all his attention. With big eyes, he tracked each and every movement Vincenzo made like it was the most interesting thing in the world. 
"No mother, no father? A bastardo of an older brother?" He shot a venomous look at the door through which the boy had disappeared, moments ago. When he turned back to the boy, though, he made sure to keep his face neutral. "Well, you’re in good company. Nobody wants me either.”
Tears welled up again in the boy’s eyes but he stayed silent and that was almost more tragic. And for the first time in a long time, Vincenzo felt something in his chest change shape. Like a crack running up a stone. But nothing can break stone, can it?
This boy, though.
This boy was like him, more so than any other kid that shared this fate, it seemed. This boy was wrong, like Vincenzo – no! This boy had something about him that made other people cast him out, discard him like yesterday’s trash. This boy, who was only beginning to learn how to speak or walk on his own two feet. No, it wasn’t his fault that people couldn’t accept him. 
So, before the thought had even reached his mind as anything more palpable than a mere idea, Vincenzo had already made a decision.
“Let's just take care of one another from now on, huh?" He stretched out his index finger and the little boy reached for it, little fist closing around it with surprising strength. Vincenzo smiled. The stretch of his cheeks felt foreign on his face. "I'll take care of you." He turned the word around in his mind before he said it, "Dongsaeng."
It felt right. 
The boy tilted his head at him. "T'seng?" 
"No. Not me." He tapped his palm against his own chest. "I'm Vincenzo."
"'Cenzo."
Vincenzo crinkled his nose at the messy pronunciation. The word must feel foreign on his tongue, too. "Actually, for you it would be hyung,” he decided instead. “Can you call me hyung?"
The boy laughed, and forgotten seemed all the tears he had spilled just a minute ago. "Hyung!"
His chest almost hurt from the debris behind his ribcage. "That's it!” he agreed. “There you go."
Vincenzo would remember that day, as clearly as when it happened, for the rest of his life.
Han-seo, though, would forget how exactly he came to be at the same orphanage, right when Vincenzo had needed him most. He would forget the older boy, no longer his brother but a stranger now, who abandoned him at the very doorstep where Vincenzo lost his mother. He was still too young, then, to remember. He would’ve forgotten that he and Vincenzo had ever been anything other than brothers, too, if not for the other kids and the adults at the orphanage reminding him that legally, biologically, they were not. 
It didn’t matter to them, anyway.
Not until a new couple entered the orphanage, and their gazes didn’t just drift over Vincenzo.
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sharkneto · 4 months
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did you ever watch fargo? it has similar story beats to true detective, at least, season one (it’s another anthology type series, crime focused) there’s a dude in there who i think you’d get a kick out out of… very much quietly intensely batshit insane and Off™️ but somehow presents himself as the sanest one in the room. he’s rust cohle, in a way, but murderer, not detective
Thanks for the rec! Watched S1 over the past week or so. Was good but it frustrated me. Billy Bob Thornton Serial Killer was the highlight, you were right! He was very fun. What a weirdo.
I don't know if it was that I grew up in an area with accents like theirs so I was like, hyper aware They Are Doing An Accent, or that it was based on Coen Brother's work, but a lot of the characters felt... rather like caricatures? I don't know, something about it had a wall between me and it, where I wasn't immersed so they felt like We Are Actors On A Set Delivering Lines Really Well rather than I was in the moment, if that makes any sense. Maybe it was the monologues, Flannigan series can have the same affect to me.
Still, was a really good cast. I needed Martin Freeman to get his comeuppence like three episodes sooner, my god that man could just wiggle out of everything (SPOILER he sent his wife to get shot???? what the fuck is wrong with him. I was screaming SPOILER OVER). I always like it when Colin Hanks pops up in things. Allison Tolman and Billy Bob Thornton fucking carried the whole thing, they were the only two I didn't really get the I Am Delivering Lines With Emotion And This Thick Minnesotan Accent feeling.
Writing was generally tight, too. Good full circle moments and Chekov's guns, pieces came together in satisfying ways. Was fun to be rooting for Molly to catch her killers and for Billy Bob to fucking get Martin Freeman. I think it could have been one episode shorter, or skipped the time jump, to give the police a modicum more competence, they were killing me.
Idk if I'll watch the other seasons, I did enjoy it overall. Might check out the newest one because I'm a slut for Jon Hamm.
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archersartcorner · 10 months
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Day 2 - Beloved!
Struggled a lil bit with what to draw for today, but the other prompt ‘Ritual’ made me think of the birth constellations, and Val, my LDB, was born under The Lover! So here’s my beloved lil guy ^u^
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sonknuxadow · 2 months
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I believe that IF Silver IS a descendent of Sonic/Shadow/Amy/anyone else, he's a descendent via adoption because the only Sonic character that I accept having kids is Vanilla.
honestly part of the reason im not a fan of the ideas of silver being a descendant of other characters we already know is because i just dont see why its necessary for them to be related ..? idk i just dont think anything that could be gained from him being shadows kid or sonics descendant or whatever is worth losing part of whats already compelling about silver and also making things super confusing. plus none of the pairings of already existing characters people have suggested as silvers bio parents make any sense, usually because its impossible from a timeline perspective but also because theyre always picking characters who would NOT have kids either in general or with the specific people theyre being paired with
#i also just kinda have a hard time imagining most sonic characters who arent already parents (so. most of them) wanting to be parents#it just does not feel right to me#i guess part of it could be an age thing . being a parent is an Adult thing and most sonic characters are not adults#so imagining them doings things that only adults do by in universe standards just feels strange and foreign to me#even though these scenarios would obviously take place a couple decades into the future#but also even when specifically thinking about it through the lens of ''would this character want to be a parent when theyre older''#the answer is usually no or idk#because there are a lot of characters where it just doesnt feel like it fits them?#sonic and rouge are a couple characters i can name off the top of my head who i know for sure would not have kids.#shadow im not so sure about either. yet he is the most common choice for silvers bio parent. pain#thing about shadow and silver is i think a timeline where shadow is actually around to meet little silver and is like#a mentor/older brother/guardian figure of sorts does kinda have potential to be interesting but i dont really want that to be made canon#but shadow straight up being his dad? idk man. not really into that. shadow being his biological dad? ABSOLUTELY not into that .#people having the present version of shadow whos a teenager barely older than silver being a dad to him?? weird as hell. no#asks#also part of what bugs me about the shadow as silvers dad stuff is people pretending its anything more than a baseless headcanon#like im not saying all headcanons have to have proof behind them but people act like the shadow as silvers dad thing#is an actual plausible theory that could be true and has tons of evidence? when it really doesnt ??#i feel the need to specify that im not trying to police what people do or aynthing just sharing my opinions
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pepprs · 1 year
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my mom isn’t letting my dad go back to his office bc him being out of the house stresses her out and makes her have a flare up and it’s like kind of insane. like i understand why the idea of him doing that would make her panicky and angry as someone who also struggles w separation anxiety and abandonment shit / has physical symptoms from that kind of stress (though not to the same degree ofc) but also he is a grown man. he should be allowed to go to his office and not have to shape his entire life around her needs. and she keeps guilt tripping him out of it and it’s impacting his quality of life a lot and the whole thing is kind of… hm
#purrs#delete later#also she’s guilt tripping me into coming to the stupid fucking potluck on sunday bc she needs the extra help and it’s like… what are you#gonna do when i move out. like i am a grown woman and i should be able to choose how i spend my two precious weekend days. and my dad is a#grown man and he should be able to choose where he works. like is that not a little bit insane. i get it but also….. i do think it s kind of#fucked ip that it’s her way or the highway and her needs take priority over all of ours and she’s asking us to bend to what she wants when#she wants it. like i get it bc she’s sick but it’s not fair for her to expect that from my dad especially. particularly when me and my#brother are back at work / school in more high risk environments than my dad who would be in a private office alll day. and the thing is no#one is brave enough to all her on it bc if we did it would be the END of the world. she even threw a fit on my dads bday and complained bc#the things he wanted to do were things she didn’t want to do like all the man wanted to do was go mini golfing and when that wasn’t good#enough he just wanted to go on a walk and my mom complained the whole time and also scoffed the movie he wanted to watch and said it was#boring and it’s like… wtf it’s HIS birthday??? but what do you expect from the woman who (and in fairness her friends got her these as gifts#but still) has TWO kitchen items that say some variation of ‘a marriage is when one is always right and the other is always the husband’ 💀#i look at that little plaque every night bc it’s in front of the sink when im doing dishes and it makes me so fucking angry. like my dad is#a whole fucking person and he can be right too and he deserves to make choices and be happy and not have his wife put him down all the time.#idk. and she puts down his family all the time too and complains when he wants to do the most reasonable things for his own enjoyment that#don’t align with hers and criticizes his interests all the time and it just sucks to see. he never shows hurt or anything so idk how he#feels about it but it makes me so angry and sad and when i tell her to stop she just lashes out at me so. 🤪. like how do we get her to stop#making her needs more important than everyone else’s bc… she may be our mom / his wife / whateger but that doesn’t make her queen. no one is#(andalso this has only gotten worse bc of covid / her being sick. like this has been a lifelong thing it’s just it’s a lot worse now bc the#circumstances gave her room / forced her to have to take up more space. and it’s just so frustrating. i get it. but none of us are pawns or#dolls or subordinates or anything. there’s 5 adults here and we should all be able to make choices and not be guilt tripped by her. lol#)
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urostakako · 10 months
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my mom is the best person in this household and she is the best person in this whole fucking family and im sick of people acting like its otherwise
#ive never met a person who has made more sacrifices than her#my aunts and my grandma made her life absolute hell and my dad never believed her and blamed her for ripping our family apart#he only believed her when he heard it straight from his sister in laws' mouth. HIS SISTER IN LAW. NOT HIS WIFE.#my dad's sisters are constantly shitting on her. constantly constantly constantly and he never thinks theres anything wrong with it#because shes from a 'lower' family and because what right does she ever have over his siblings who have bullied him his whole life#it makes no fucking sense how he can side with these people over his own wife. what kind of husband are you#and my mom has done infinitely more for my brother than my dad but somehow my brother finds blame for her for every single thing#if there is a problem like the lights going out EVEN IF MY MOM ISNT FUCKING HOME my brother will find a way to blame her for it#because everything is a womans fault. if she makes him late to school once he wont talk to her for weeks disregarding all the times he made#her late for work and made her work until 9 in the fucking night to make up for it#and if my dad ever does the same thing? oh its not his fault 😐#these people are all the worst hypocrites#everybody has their flaws. my mom surely has flaws too. but who are you people to act this way to your wife. to your mother.#someone who has sacrificed for you over and over and over again and continues to suffer because of you but still does things for you without#complaint#my mom's mother is sick and was so close to dying these past few weeks. alhamdullilah shes doing better now#but my dad did not call my nani or my mom's siblings once. NOT ONCE. never asked about her. never did anything#and then when my mom had enough and called him out on not being there for family he yelled at her for being crazy and unreasonable#but if this were any of my dad's siblings and my mom didnt call hed throw an absolute fit 'oh youre horrible you dont even think of family?'#my mom is somehow always the scapegoat for every single problem. if my dad drives recklessly and breaks smth in the car#and then my brother drives the car he will blame my mom for breaking the car because women are always horrible drivers#if my dad leaves the lights on and the bulbs stop working my brother will blame my mom#if my brother does something horrible my dad will say my mom is the reason hes grown up this way#DISREGARDING THAT HE HIMSELF ENABLES MY BROTHERS BEHAVIOR.#im so sick of this family im sick of their hypocrisy. my mom is the best person theyll ever meet AND THEY KNOW IT#if i could be even half the person my mom is i would not have the problems i do now#aricouldyounot
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willowfey · 1 year
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ignore this i just wanna ramble in the tags for a sec i’ll probably delete it in a bit 🤪
#did an escape room with the fam on my sister’s birthday two days ago and my brother made me feel stupid the entire time#wouldn’t listen to me wouldn’t share or let me help and then act like i wasn’t helping (??? let me then)#and because he’s Loud my whole family was following his lead and ignoring me#but in the end i was the reason we won bc i was the only one who immediately understood the word riddles AND the one who wrote down#all the numbers he said we wouldn’t need. i was the only one who could connect the past information with the current problem#the only one who listened fully to the cd and decided to write down the locations without it being relevant yet#the only one who thought the tiny details might be relevant and the only one who automatically fixed his mistakes bc i noticed a pattern#and in the end still got no credit for anything (except from my mom) even tho if they had listened to me from the beginning they would’ve#been less stressed and finished sooner#then at the restaurant he didn’t listen to me again and we ordered too much even tho i told him we wouldn’t need it#THEN after dinner my grandma started texting me all frustrated telling me i need to keep my aunt updated on what’s happening thru the day#so she doesn’t feel left out. bc she’s having a rough time lately. bc it’s my job to make everyone feel better#FIRST of all this woman ignored me for years when her ex husband decided i wasn’t worth it#and now suddenly it’s my job to keep u informed on my every move so u don’t feel left out?? text me urself. ask what i’m doing.#ask HOW i’m doing??? do u even care beyond a ‘what colour is your sturdiness today namaste’#every time my aunt complains about the tiniest thing and starts crying about it it my grandma blames everyone else#no one even knows or cares if i’m having a rough time#she came to ‘help’ when my mom was sick and i did everything for her instead. and then she threw a fit when i wouldn’t eat her salad#when i was too exhausted from staying up all night with my mother to go on a run with her the next day#my mom finally got mad at her for implying i’m lazy all the time and told her i’m ‘neurodiverse’ and do things my own way and she didn’t#even know what that meant so my mom was like ‘on the spectrum ‘ and my aunt just got mad that she had never told her#would it have made a difference at all? would u have expected different from me?#meanwhile i’ve done so much for my cousin… including taking care of luca the entire time she stayed with us. i had him all the time#i didn’t mind. i love that kid more than anything. but everyone expects everything from me like it’s just a given#i talked her through every problem every breakdown walked on eggshells to keep her happy and then what does she do when she leaves?#ignores me. doesn’t come back when she said she would. complains that i don’t include her in things#bc sometimes i have quiet conversations with my sister so i don’t bother everyone#and then gg wants to know why i won’t come see her? why i won’t drop everything to fly there? my aunt wants to know why i don’t call?#because despite loving me u have made me feel inadequate my whole life. some of u more than others#and i’m tired. and it’s time for me to Be me For me without justifying it to everyone else.
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Is2g I’m going to start writing fan fiction where the reader’s family emotionally neglected them and/or the reader just dodges questions about them
Cuz I swear it’s either the parents are completely in almost every word of abusive OR reader has a healthy relationship with her family
Which isn’t bad obviously but there’s nothing for the emotional neglected and having to raise yourself crowd so ;v;
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futureghost97 · 1 year
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happy holidays
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begaycommittreason · 2 months
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out of context things heard in wayne manor:
bruce: i understand, but pretending you cooked jerry the turkey is not a proportionate response to damian calling you a peasant again
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jason: look there’s a right way and a wrong way to make food. there’s also the bruce way, which is the wrong way except faster and worse
duke: *frantically scribbling notes*
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tim: do you think our relationship was kinda like incest now?
steph, horrified: never open your mouth in my presence again timothy
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dick: so then he’s like—guys. guys are you seriously signing about me in front of my face. i learned it too—hey i do NOT have a butt chin take that back—
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damian: i don’t understand, why does he wear such a ridiculous hat? is it like that margaret poppins woman grayson showed me?
tim, who watched the live action cat in the hat too much as a kid and is about to violently infodump: well you see-
dick: oh god it’s too late
jason: yeah the brats on his own for this one i’m not fucking dealing with that again
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bruce: are you lying?
tim: always. anyway, like i was saying—
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steph: hey what’s up with you and all the redheads
dick: …i’m not discussing this with you
steph, starting to chase him: gingervitus is a serious affliction! you cant run from this
dick, sprinting away: yes the fuck i can
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duke: so is anyone gonna talk about the elephant in the room…
dick:
dick: look i was feeling sentimental and zitka jr. really isn’t any trouble
damian: she is magnificent
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tim: so i dropped out and
duke: wait we can drop out of high school??!!?
bruce: NO.
duke: please bruce ap biology is beating my ass right now
jason: nah tim just got to drop cause bruce was dead and he’s a loser. the real problem is what you’re reading in ap lit right now, because i have thoughts on that curriculum—
duke: i’m not even gonna use half that material in the real world
tim: actually most of our villains have PhDs so their plans are based on pretty real science
duke: not helping timothy
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cass, signing: why are brothers on the ceiling?
jason: tims in timeout from working on his caseload
cass, still confused: yes but why taped to the ceiling
duke: listen if you know a better way of restraining his psycho ass then i’m all ears
cass: and damian?
jason: oh he saw this as free range target practice so he had to go up there too
cass: they are plotting revenge up there
duke: think of it as brotherly bonding
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damian: it’s not my fault he got in the way
bruce: you threw an eclair at lex luthor
damian: i was aiming for drake
tim: bruce we can’t take him anywhere
dick, holding back laughter: timmy you paid four separate people to come to the gala solely to ask lex if they could use his head to see if they had something in their teeth
tim: you have no proof that was me
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duke: look steph, it’s not that we don’t want to help with this
jason: i don’t want to help
duke: it’s more that i don’t think we can physically fit that many people in a shopping cart, and your whole plan kind of hinges on that
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alfred: i’m not mad, just disappointed in you.
every batkid, near tears: sorry alfred
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jason: HE HAD DIPLOMATIC IMMUNITY AS THE FUCKING WHAT—
bruce: listen—
tim, mouth full and brain empty: the ambassador to iran. crazy right?
dick: tim please
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