#and tagging for visibility is such a pain... i could skip it but i want my stuff to be seen xP

[radibe5]

What's your AU 👁️

the one i was thinking of today? too nsfw for tumblr 😂😂😂😂 but i have several... honestly im obsessed w a lot of my aus. i hope someday i can make them see the light of day in a fully-written form but well... you know the struggle 🥲 i mostly just write little rants about em on discord, but i should really post em here! well, the more sfw ones anyway... xP

[yandere-romanticaa]

.ೃ࿐ crazy in love.

❝ it's the way that you know what i thought i know, it's the beat that my heart skips when I'm with you, but i still don't understand, just how your love can do what no one else can. ❞

SONG: crazy in love by sofia karlberg.

yandere! al-haitham x gn! reader.

warning for mentions for past suggestive activities. this is a proper fic version of this thing here because I originally wanted it to be longer but was too tired to continue it... but you people still loved it.

Fun fact - this has been sitting in my drafts since 2022!

Chattering sailors went on and on as you stared emptily at the hustling and bustling city in front of you, the various lights and lanterns bringing Port Ormos into life as people happy walked on with each other, eager to either finish their duties and go home or they can finally unwind and relax with their friends and family, a promise of either good food, drinks or both waiting for them.

Biting on your lower lip you narrowed your eyes, bitter feelings taking over your entire feeling from top to bottom.

Oh, what you'd give to be in their shoes right now.

Pulling your arms closer towards your body you huddled yourself for some warmth as you tilted your head slightly to the side, the ocean view and the chilly wind being the only ones to greet you. The scent of salt dominated your senses as you closed your eyes and sighed, subconsciously relaxing just a little bit as you accidentally imagined his hand on your back. The memory of his warm knuckles brought you back down to earth as you shuddered, the memory etched in your mind as you desperately tried to shake your head, a pathetic attempt of trying to forget. Even while you weren't with him Al-Haitham still managed to dominate your mind, whether you wanted him there or not.

With a quiet yell only you could hear you plopped yourself back on your feet, your feet almost giving in and falling to the ground had the strong grip around your waist not been holding you in place. Pure shock was written on your face as you turned your head once more and was met with the person you least wanted to see right now.

Al-Haitham said nothing as he carefully brought you back up, your arms pressed firmly against his chest as he slightly lowered his head down to your level, his nose lightly touching your own. A furious blush dusted your cheeks as you retreated back from him, fiery rage burning deep in your heart as you turned your back and practically ran away from the man. Before you could get too far though Al-Haitham managed to catch up to you, his arms tightly gripping your wrists as he lead you to a dark alleyway, determination shining bright in his eyes.

"Why are you avoiding me?"

Hah, what a stupid question. You were tempted to just spit on him.

"Why am I avoiding you? The nerve you have..." you replied with a loud scoff, absolute venom coating your words. This attitude would usually be a little amusing to him but Al-Haitham was not in the mood to play games, not now at least. He needed a straight answer out of you and he planned to get it one way or another. With one hand he was now holding both of your wrists high above your head, back against the wall as the thumb from his other free hand traced tiny patterns across your lips.

"I have the right to ask you know. There used to be a time when you could hardly keep your hands to yourself and now you..."

He suddenly retreated his hand back, a barely visible inkling of shock visible in his eyes.

He didn't think you'd try and bite him. And clearly, you were out to make it painful.

You were downright growling at him now, screams of anger threatening to spill out of your mouth and second now as the two of you remained still in your places, the cover of darkness being your only companion for the time being. With the ounce of composure you had left you finally found the right words and said:

🍒 TAGS: @genshinarchives, @universal-rose, @juuuuuj101010, @mod-kisa-blog, @morigumy, @b10h4z4rd

"You, Al-Haitham, are infuriating. All you do is make me miserable and once you're done with me you just toss me away like the most worthless piece of garbage in the whole wide world and then have the nerve to be displeased with me whenever I leave? Tell me, tell me dear Al-Haitham, just where is the logic in that?"

Alhaitham stood back, which allowed some distance between the two of you. Despite the schooled expression on his face his jaw was a dead giveaway. The way it tensed up could cut diamonds but you didn't mind.

You took pleasure in making him as uncomfortable as you possibly could.

Despite the awkward tension in the air, he clearly wasn't planning on letting you go any time soon. Just what was he trying to achieve here? Whatever happened between you had vanished, the spark was gone. At the start you found Alhaitham attractive, very much so even. Having one too many glasses of wine gave you confidence you didn't even know you had which allowed you to make your feelings more... vocal.

Alhaitham made sure to pull out as many different sounds out of you that night, like a twisted symphony of wicked pleasure.

Ever since then, he has been hot on your trail. Constantly sending you gifts, letters, books, trinkets that you didn't even dream of affording - just how rich was he?!

Still, the harder you pushed, the more he came back running. Like a lost pup who was just waiting for his treat but you, the cruel master, was refusing to budge.

It was a tiresome song and dance that seemed to have no end in sight.

He wasn't going to leave you be, no matter how hard you tried to run away. That was your punishment for ever allowing yourself to get so close to him.

[justmystyles]

Home Stretch

read my other work here

pairing: Harry Styles x plus size reader

word count: 1.3k

summary: as the tour comes to an end, the schedule starts to visibly take its toll on Harry, and you can't help but worry.

warnings: a couple of curse words, but other than that, it's tame.

a/n: we've all seen the Frankfurt night 2 videos. our boy is slowing down, so i had this idea for a blurb. i'll miss all the looks and videos and everything we've been getting the last couple of years, but i'm so glad he's going to be able to take some time to relax and recover.

tags: @allthelovehes @ameerakane20 @ash-craze @bethanysnow @blue-ballad @brightlightsinlife @creativelyeva @cute-as-ducks420 @fanficismydrug @gem1712 @golden-hoax @gothmingguk @groovychaosavenue @hillzrry @iceebabies @indierockgirrl @jerseygirlinca @jng4kook @jooniesbabie @kaverichauhan @lexiecamposv @mrs-anna-styles211994 @n0vaj3an @ravenclawdirectioner @stylesfeverr @superchrystaldrug @tenaciousperfectionunknown @tiaamberxx @thechaoticjoy @theekyliepage @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @youknowwhaaat

You watched on with so much pride and joy as Harry gave his all on stage. It was the second night in Frankfurt, and your last night on the tour for two weeks. You had some family obligations that you needed to go back to the states for, but you promised Harry that you would be there for his last show. And then the two of you would ride off into the sunset and hide away together for a few weeks. You were looking forward to that. 

Your mind had drifted off, thinking about the two of you isolated in a villa somewhere, but quickly snapped back to the present when you saw Harry falter onstage, it looked as if his knee had given out. Your heart stopped and your eyes went wide. 

You lean over, getting Brad’s attention. “Did you see that?”

Brad nodded in response. “It’s been a long tour, and you know how hard he pushes up there.”

Your worried eyes are locked on Harry when it suddenly clicks; he hadn’t been doing as many jumps as he usually does, his satellite stops had been lacking their usual stomp. He’s hurting, but still pushing so hard. You can’t seem to let go of your concern. Your fingers start tapping against your thighs, a nervous tick of yours. You have to do something, you can’t just stand here and watch him push and continue to hurt himself. 

“I’m going to go back and make sure there’s an ice bath ready for him as soon as he gets off.” You tell Brad, who nods in acknowledgement, but you don’t see it. You had turned and started to make your way backstage as soon as you finished the sentence. 

When you get to the backstage area, you arrange an ice bath for him and make sure his dressing room is set up with towels and his post show change of clothes. You just have to be doing something.

Once you had things set up for him, you went to the side of the stage to watch the rest of the show. You were studying his every move looking for any signs of pain or discomfort. When he noticed that you had moved from your usual spot in the front of the house, he shot you a questioning look. You simply shrugged and shot him a wink. 

Your concern continued through the rest of the show, relieved when he substituted finger guns for his usual ‘Kiwi kicks’. You positioned yourself so that you would be right there when he got offstage, as he skipped toward the exit, you saw the moment where he decided he was far enough from the crowd that he could drop the facade. His skip quickly turned to a limp, and he practically doubled over. 

You rushed over to him, placing a hand on his back and offering your other arm to him for support. “Baby, are you alright?” 

Harry chuckled, a small cough escaping him. “I’m fine princess, you worry too much.” He leaned in, kissing you softly. “Why’d you come back here? I like having you in the audience.” 

Despite assuring you he was fine, he continued to use your arm for support as you slowly made your way to his dressing room. “Because you’re hurt, and I wanted to make sure to get everything set up for you as soon as you got offstage.” 

“Set up everything?” He asked. You opened the door to his dressing room to reveal the ice bath you had prepared for him. He looked over at you with a wide smile. “God, I love you.” 

You leaned up, pressing a kiss to his lips. He puts his hand on the back of your head, deepening it. You pull away with a smirk. “I love you too. Now get in there, I’m going to go–”

“No, stay with me.” He pleads. “You’re leaving tomorrow and I’m not going to see you for two whole weeks.” He gave you his best puppy dog face, the one he knew you couldn’t resist. 

“Ugh, fine.” You roll your eyes playfully. “But I am not getting into that thing.” You point to the tub filled with ice and water. 

“Your loss,” he shrugs, closing the dressing room door and immediately stripping down. 

You get yourself comfortable on the couch as Harry lowers himself into the tub. You give him a few minutes of silence as he adjusts to the temperature change. 

“So, how did I do tonight princess?” He asked once he was settled. 

You let out a deep sigh. “You were good, but I’m really starting to get worried about you.” 

His brow knit in confusion. “Why?”

“Harry Edward Styles, you have got to be kidding me?”

“Did you just use my full name?” He was taken aback. 

“You’re goddamned right I did. Baby you did amazing, you always do, but you give so much of yourself, it’s starting to take a toll on you. And I’m worried about you.” 

“Oh angel,” he reaches his hand out to you. You scoot over on the couch to get closer to him, taking his offered hand. “Please don’t worry. There are only five shows left, I’ll get through these and then I’ll get some time to rest. We’ll get some time to rest.” He brings your joined hands to his lips. “Besides, I have you here to take care of me, so I know everything will be fine.” 

“Yeah, but I’m not going to be here for four out of those five shows. What if something bad happens?” Your breath hitches slightly as you try to control your emotions. 

Harry’s brows round in concern. “Baby, come here.” He tugs on your arm, and you narrow your eyes, making him chuckle. “I promise I won’t pull you in.” You move closer, kneeling beside the tub. He rests his hand on the side of your neck, pulling you in so your forehead rests against his. “I promise you, I am going to give everything I have responsibly for the last few shows. I will keep modifying things, and take it extra easy offstage. But I owe it to the fans to give them everything I possibly can until the end.”

“I know, I’m just afraid that you’re going to give so much that you won’t have enough for yourself once this is all over. You’re too selfless sometimes.” You raise your free hand, pushing a stray curl out of his face.

Harry kisses you, you can feel him smile against your lips. “I love you for worrying about me as much as you do. And for taking care of me like this. As much fun as I’m having, and as sad as I am to see the tour come to an end, I’m looking forward to having some time to take care of you, and try to pay you back for everything you’ve done for me this whole time. And I plan to be in tip top shape when I do that.” 

“You don’t have to pay me back for anything. I do this because I love you, and the fact that I get to be here by your side and love you is all the payback I need.” You lean in, placing a lingering kiss on his lips.

Harry groans as you pull away. “Are you sure you need to leave tomorrow?” 

“Yeah,” you sigh. “I’ve got my mom’s whole birthday thing. I need to be home for that.” 

“But you’ll be in Italy?” He questions.

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world,” you say with a smile. “Somebody is going to need to have an ice bath ready for you.” You wink. 

“Will you do that one with me?” He asked hopefully.

You scrunch your face, hating the idea of sitting in a giant bucket of cold water. “Maybe.” 

[itsgameofthronesimagines]

I'm not going to lie, I hope Cersei is suffering wondering how her daughter is doing in the hands of the enemy. Her character is well written (both by you and Martin) but gods, I hate her.

(Gif not mine)

‘Black of Hair’ Masterlist

Tag: black of hair got headcanon

A/N: Set sometime in the future, but I promise there is no spoilers for any future chapters. This is set in the future so Tyrion has enough time to return to King’s Landing as Acting Hand of the King and finally confront his sister. This takes place sometime after Tyrion sends Myrcella to Dorne.

Also based off of this conversation!

~~~

The warm afternoon air was ever prominent when Tyrion walked himself into the Queen's apartments, a slight skip in his step as he called out to his sister, "I've just received word from Dorne! Princess Myrcella has been safely delivered. Oberyn Martell promises you will be gifted plenty of letters from her whilst she is away."

Cersei glanced over at the small man from her sitting spot next to the open window, allowing the warm air in. The news did nothing but earn the constant scowl on her beautiful face to deepen, "It must please you to see me like this. A lonely mother, separated from her daughter."

Tyrion stopped only a few feet from her, his smile still visible despite how it thinned out in response to her words. He keeps his hands at his sides, rolling his fingers across his palms to relieve the urge to fidget, “It must be invigorating to blame others for what you have always done upon your kin your whole life."

She scoffed under her breath, rolling her eyes and turning back towards the window. Tyrion allows the silence to linger a bit longer, listening to the birds chirp outside before he took a step forward, "The other day, you said you wanted me to fall in love with a woman so that when I close my eyes, I see her face," Cersei turned back, one eyebrow rising along with the corner of her mouth as she allowed herself to reminisce her own words. Tyrion continued, eyes darkening as his facade begins to slip, "You wanted that for me so you could take her from me. Please enlighten me on how you could possibly hurt me that you haven’t already done a hundred times over.”

“A hundred? I lost count after a dozen," she sniped, reveling in the small flinch she caught flash over her brother's eyes, "Tell me, what have I done that’s worse than what I plan to do to the woman you love?”

“Isn’t it obvious? Why else would you send away your own beloved daughter if it wasn’t to harm me?"

"You didn't give me the choice of sending Myrcella away!" Her small bit of joy shattered, her inner viper lashing out at the very memory of sending her baby away, "Or have you forgotten?"

"It's rather baffling how a mother could lose count of all the infants she's pushed out of her body," Tyrion sniped back, an equally wry grin sprouting along with his sarcasm, "Please tell me you haven't forgotten that Myrcella was not your only daughter."

Silence fills the room again as Cersei's visceral reaction dims, returning to her usual bored scowl when she feels a lecture coming on. This only angers Tyrion further and the words spill out before he could stop them, "Y/n was sent away, too, and if you tried to place that blame on me as you do on everything else, I'm afraid you won't find any evidence other than the ones that point back to you. You know I love that girl."

With another roll of her eyes and Cersei suddenly stands, crossing the room to pour herself a drink as her brother mouths on and on, "I cherish her like she was my own and you knew that! You would and have done quite possibly everything in the book to bring me pain! You would even go as far as to marry your daughter off like some common whore! I only returned the favor by sending Myrcella away, since you clearly pick favorites!”

Like rubbing salt in a very painful wound, Cersei's grin becomes engraved in Tyrion's memory when she looked back over her shoulder at him, "You're not her father. You will never be her father. Learn your place or I will remind you of it."

"Let me remind you that I am the Hand of the King until Father's return," he snapped, "Speaking of fathers, I've noticed that your children have been lacking in some of late, especially for Y/n. It's not like you've ever let Jaime treat her like his own."

Cersei's eyes darken, "Watch your words--"

"And we both know that Robert nursed his cups more than his children. Someone had to be a parent to sweet little Y/n and I wasn't exactly placing my bets on the woman who birthed her. Admit that you never loved her! Admit that you were desperate to be rid of her! That you wanted nothing more than to send her as far away as you possibly could so that you can have your three beautiful golden-haired angels all to yourself! You would have done anything and you did! You sent Y/n North to marry a Stark! You sold her into the same slavery Father sold you! You sent her to a life that promises nothing but the birthing bed for her! You sent her away to be enslaved and bred because you never loved her!"

“I’ll have your tongue for that!” But instead of pursuing her threat, Cersei began to walk away, holding a hand to her lips as she made her retreat.

“That’s what you’ve always told everyone, right?” Tyrion’s voice cracked under pressure, stomping after his sister like an angry child, desperate for attention, only raising his voice whenever she didn’t appear to hear him, “‘Love no one but your children. Love no one but your children. No one but your children. No one but your children. Your. Children!’ Did you somehow forget that Y/n was your firstborn child?! Tell me when exactly did you realize the enemy -that you enraged by letting your son lop off Ned Stark's head- now possesses your dearly beloved daughter? Was it before or after I took Myrcella from you?"

A resounding slap is heard across the room as Tyrion stumbles back, words cut short as his hand flies up to his face. Pulling the hand away, he observed a small speck of blood drawn from his left cheek, his rage dissolving as he listened to the Queen's ragged breath. Peering up through his golden locks, he carefully watched Cersei's expression, catching that familiar rage and wild look behind her green eyes, like a caged lioness.

Cersei's breaths were spiraling, chest moving rapidly to regain a small bit of air. In a way, the slap was a small bit of a relief for her, allowing it to pour her emotions into the action itself as she watched the tiny little fingernail scratches now adorning her little brother's face. Her lips nearly turned up into a smile as she spoke, “The more people you love, the weaker you are, dear brother. You’ll do things for them that you know you shouldn’t do. You’ll act the fool to make them happy, to keep them safe.”

Tyrion huffed, shaking his head in disbelief, flicking his wrist to dry the blood on his hand, “Are you trying to tell me that you did all of this because you love Y/n? Because you wanted to keep her safe? Or are you trying to tell me that you couldn’t have possibly loved her because it only made you weak?”

She appeared as though she was going to answer, only for the curtain to close once more behind her eyes. She straightened her posture back out, becoming the regal queen she had fooled everyone into believing she was, everyone but her brother, “If you can’t figure it out yourself, then you don’t deserve the answer.”

~~~

A/N: Yes, I took a piece of Cerisei and Sansa’s conversation and used to it to my advantage. 

[maverickcalf]

I have some thoughts on Twisters, i will honestly remake these posts without the spoiler tag once the movie has been out for a while but fot now. Spoilers under the cut. Warning major spoilers and i ramble a lot.

So it's not too shocking that Kate's friends and boyfriend are killed off in the beginning. But i was surprised how while it is cleqr one visibly haunts her more than the others, when it comes to talking about who she lost it's always "friends". Even if she lost her significant other, there isn't like any line from Tyler about him. Honestly it's just nice that he treats her pain as legitimate.

The only time i feel it is implied "you lost your boyfriend" is when Javi says that he lost friends and that could be seen as him downplaying her lose because he lost multiple friends and she lost a boyfriend but i also think that would be a stretch and the trouble is they haven't talked about their trauma.

Javi feels guilty he left them all to die; Kate feels guilty because of the experiment.

I honestly love how friendship is portrayed as important. Tyler's team is his team but it's pretty clear they are all close. I like the friendship Kate and Javi have, especially after the time skip, it's very awkward and forced at time but that makes total sense.

Honestly i like Tyler in general, he comes off as a show off and that's what makes it so interesting! Because we have the wrong point of view and i like when the movie sets up stuff like that.

Also Tyler is very smart but also sort of silly and people are calling him a himbo and... no thats just what streamers are like. He does seem like a nice person and i like how he is also allowed to fail in saving someone.

I totally love the parallels. The failing to save someone while the tornado is on them. The hitting the machine to get to work. The injured leg! And how both her and Katie are allowed to succeed where they failed before. Katie saves everyone because her experiment works and Tyler saves Lilly, where he had failed to save the man earlier.

I really like Ben and how he does drop the camera and help people rather than document people's panic. And he is just like funny bystander.

Scott Javi's partner.... should've been gay and honestly until the end where he became full Saturday morning cartoon villain, the vibes were Bill Hader's character in Tropic Thunder but... ya know less interesting. Les and Rob actually seem to like each other though and Javi.... yeah picking up straight vibes. So a bit disappointing.

Last of all Katie. Oh boy, this girl has the weight of global warming on her shoulders. Like holy shit, i just wanna give her a hug. I love how the truama doesn't stop her from being smart and i also love the realism of being a bit rusty. But also she is just fun and funny. I loved when she and Tyler were trying to trick each other. Wouldn't be if they both turned into looney toons characters and feld the scene.

But also i like how she is a well rounded character. I didn't know going in we were following her story but i am honestly so glad, she is such a good protagonist.

Yeah okay i think i have rambled enough, if someone has thoughts they want to share please do.

[miloouch]

BLUE GENESIS - CHAPTER 1

TW: mention of death, mention of injury, mention of blood.

-

A/N: Hi people! As promised, here is the first chapter of BLUE GENESIS which means the story has officially started. I'm super excited to share it with you guys and I really hope you feel the same.

As always, any feedback and constructive criticism is welcomed and appreciated.

With that said, please enjoy!

-

PS: I want to thank all of you for the warm welcome you gave the Prologue and thank the ones who interacted with it. It really does mean the world to me!

-

TAGS: @tpwkstiles | @yeosxxx | @mashiromochi | @ellielovesrobinarellano | @irissfoot | @tojigirl | @namgification | @penquinsqge |

-

WORD COUNT : 3,038

-

2170, Orbit of Pandora.

''...can you hear us?" The voice ranged and bounced on the walls of Sini's skull, making her head ache worse than it already was. She opened her eyes carefully, her vision blurry as she tried to adjust to the harsh white light of the neons that buzzed above her head. After a few seconds, her surroundings got clearer and she finally saw Dr. Katz and Garcia's faces above her own.

She let out a small grunt as she slowly moved her head to look around the room she was laying in. The room was covered in white from its floor to ceiling, the only visible colors were the ones displayed on the monitor to her left. Sini hated the familiarity of this environment. It was like she was back in the hospital again. Like she was still dying.

The thought of her death pulled her back to reality as she finally realized where she truly was. Her eyes widened as she looked at the faces of the scientists who towered over her. Realization hitting the girl like a truck that was going a thousand miles an hour.

She watched the two individuals as they checked her reactions and reflexes of various parts of her body. She lifted her head slowly, wanting to have a better look at what was really happening and what they were doing to her.

"If you're willing to seat up, take it slow." Sage said, her voice slightly muffled by the oxygen she wore.

Listening to the advice, Sini slowly and carefully rose to a sitting position, her long, blue legs extended to their full length in front her.

"So blue..." She whispered to herself, mesmerized by the view of her new body. Her new self.

She had dreamed of this moment the day of her death. It wasn't a painful experience like she thought it would have been. She went through medical suicide so the scientists of the Avatar Program could collect what had always made her what she was.

The memories from that day were quite messy, but one thing that really stuck to her mind was that she died on the day of her birthday. April 11th. So technically speaking she was born on the same day again. In a different body.

She was amazed by how much more aware of her environment she felt in her new body. Sini saw everything brighter and and more precisely, heard sounds she could have never perceived in her human form. She felt so strong and empowered by her new appearance it made her smile from ear to ear.

"Would you like to see yourself?" Armand asked, pulling the girl out of her dreaming state. She gave the man a slight nod and was handed a mirror.

"...wow." She sighed out as her eyes wandered over the face of her Avatar. It was her and there was no denying it. Some of her old features back when she was still human stuck with her and transfered to her new form. Her heterochromia was still here.

That distinctive feature that had caused her to be bullied as a kid had stuck around, giving her an amberish right eye while the left one was of a bright green color.

A small, content smile formed on her face as she finally spoke for the first time.

"Thank you." Sini said, happiness and gratitude laced to her words.

[TIME SKIP TO THE ARRIVAL ON PANDORA]

After having landed on the new planet, each teams and units got to the location where they would probably spend most of their time.

The science unit went on a quick tour of the lab where most of them would live for the following years. Before entering the place the four Avatars of the team – which included Sini – were given masks so they could breathe during the tour.

Even though they had been taught that they could breathe 'human air' without any problem, they had learned that they could feel dizzy if they were exposed to it for too long.

The place was of a reasonable size compared to the whole environment of the base the lab was in. There was a lab of course, where the scientists would probably spend time studying wonders of Pandora's environment. Connected by a small and narrow corridor was the cafeteria that had obviously been designed for the human scientists, the chairs and tables too small for an Avatar to seat and have a meal there.

The visit continued and humans were the ones who had to put on oxygen masks before they all headed outside to lead the Avatars their own headquarters.

The architecture was more fitted to the natural environment of Pandora. The small building was made of wood for the most part with a few human touches here an there. Inside, there was another lab as well as a cafeteria and a dorm. Another room was added to the building, one that wasn't inside the human unit. It was a gym with different machines on which they were told to train everyday to reinforce their new bodies.

"This is were you'll be spending most of your time guys." Dr. Garcia said as the Avatars looked down at her small frame.

"See you all this afternoon for the first expedition. We will be collecting samples to study them back in the lab." Those were her last words before she headed back to the human unit.

Sini went back outside, heading to the yard of the science team where she laid on the soft grass before closing her eyes and enjoying warmth of the sun on her blue skin. She breathed in the the pure air that was all around her, relaxing while she could, knowing that her first scientific expedition was in the afternoon.

[TIME SKIP TO THE EXPEDITION]

The Samson flew above the beautiful forest of Pandora, the science team composed of Dr. Garcia and the Avatars on its board. Sini had learned their names before the mission. There was Silas Lopez, a biologist who was there to learn about the flora and fauna of the planet. The other one was a girl named Alice Van Bergen, who was also a biologist. The last one, Adam Coorey, was a former soldier who was there to keep the team safe during missions.

When it came to Sini, she didn't really know why she was there but Armand had told her that she would learn on the field.

The girl looked around at the beautiful scenery. The view was captivating. They had all heard and read about this place before but they could have never had imagined it to be so heaven like. This place felt surreal, like something out of a fever dream.

The Samson landed in the middle of the dense forest and the expedition finally began. They all went around the forest, the scientists walking in front while she and Adam were in the back, silently following the others.

"This place is truly beautiful..." She said, more to herself but the soldier who was walking next to her heard the statement and responded.

"Right? I never thought I'd see something so amazing coming here." He declared, admiring the nature that surrounded the group.

They all came to a stop when the biologists finally found a spot where they could collect samples. Sini, not knowing what to do with herself decided to look around at the different plants she could see.

"Don't wander too far Sini. We wouldn't want you to get lost." Sage said earning a simple smile of approval from the young Avatar.

Pandora's environment was so magnificent. It was like every step she took, she discovered something new. She was truly captivated by the nature that engulfed her in a deep yet comfortable silence, the only sound being the wind softly blowing the branches of the huge trees and the different animals that were probably observing her as she walked further away from the group without realizing it.

But when she did, the eclipse had happened and she knew she would never find her way back to them. She was lost in a place she knew too little about to feel safe.

She wanted to scream but soon realized that it would be useless and dangerous. She didn't want to attract any animal by making herself known and vulnerable. She kept on walking, going deeper in the forest hoping to find a safe place to spend the night.

Suddenly, she heard a growl coming from behind her, her ears flattening on the side of her head and tail swinging from left to right in an fast rythm as she felt danger too close for the girl not to worry. She carefully turned around and it only took her a second to understand that if she didn't start running at this exact moment she would get killed. And that's exactly what she did.

She ran as fast as she possibly could, the beast –which she believed to be a Thanator– roared as it chased her. Her heart was beating so fast she thought it would probably pop out of her ribcage. But despite the fear she felt from being chased, there was this adrenaline that kept her going endlessly. She felt alive.

For the first time in what had seemed like a hundred years, she was truly there, living and fighting for herself. To her surprise a laugh of pure happiness came out of her mouth. It was so loud and sincere that it only made her run faster.

-

"Did you hear that?" Lo'ak asked his brother who was riding his ikran as he looked around, hoping to find the source of the noise.

"No I didn't, but it doesn't matter. We have to go back home or father will skin us." Neteyam said in a strict tone before giving him a warning look.

"Come ooon! What are you afraid of big bro?" The younger teased, a small smirk pulling at the right corner of his lips.

"Nothing, I just don't want to take the fall for your skxawng ass again." He explained, his voice laced with authority.

Lo'ak rolled his eyes as a sigh left him.

The two of them flew quietly before he heard the same sound as he did a few minutes ago coming from forest under them. The area below them wasn't as dense as the others so when he looked down to find the source of the noise he was quick to see a Palulukan chasing a prey, except, the prey was a Na'vi. He let out a small shriek before diving with his ikran towards the predator.

"Lo'ak!" Neteyam yelled after him, before diving to follow his brother.

-

Sini was growing tired the further she ran in the forest, but she was still laughing loudly, but not because she was happy. She was stressed that her legs would give up on her any second as she felt all the muscles of her body slowly reaching their breaking point. She knew she had to find a place to hide before the Thanator jumped on her.

She looked around and suddenly saw a cabin. It was the exact copy of the ones they had back at the base but this one was in ruins. One of the windows was broken and she knew it was her only chance to escape the beast that was chasing her. She sprinted towards the cabin and in a quick motion, jumped through the said window before stepping away from the open area. The Thanator tried to get in but it could only fit two of its legs through the opening. Roaring out of frustration, the beast had been defeated and soon ran away.

"That was so fucking close!" She exclaimed, absolutely exhausted from the effort she had just came out of. A loud fit of laughter emanated from her, relief washing over her as she was finally safe. She just couldn't stop laughing. Until she heard a sound coming from somewhere near the cabin.

She got silent, her breathing being the only noise that filled the cabin as she tried to listen to her surroundings. She heard steps getting closer to where she was and before she knew it there was a loud thud, signaling that someone or something had entered the cabin.

She held her breath, wanting to be as silent as she possibly could, waiting to see what had made the noise.

"Lo'ak! Za'u ne'ìm fìtsenge!" Sini heard someone say, but she couldn't understand a single word. She got into a squatting position as she meticulously tried find a way out of the cabin without getting caught.

"Where do you think you're going?" Another voice said, but this time she understood and before she could realize it, someone had grabbed her upper arm and dragged her out of the cabin.

Once outside, she tried to free herself from the strong grip but it was useless. Her muscles were exhausted from all the running she had done. Her movement came to an abrupt stop as she felt a sharp object pressed on the soft skin of her neck.

She didn't really took the time to look at the person that was now threatening her before so she decided to do it now. Her gaze shifted from the floor to the Na'vi facing her.

He looked angry, ready to slit her throat open at any moment. Yet, she knew better than to fear her opponent and so she kept her gaze fixed on the ones of the boy standing in front of her. Her two colored eyes never leaving his green ones.

"What are you doing here?" The Na'vi asked, his ears pointing backwards, anger tied to every of his words.

She was surprised he spoke English but assumed he could have learned it at some point. She didn't have a clue what to answer. What was she really doing here? She had no idea where she was.

"Answer!" The guy yelled at her face, his knife lightly pressing at her throat.

"I'm lost! Please don't kill me!" She pleaded.

She wasn't afraid of death itself but she just didn't want to ruin the opportunity she had to restart a new life.

"Drop your knife Lo'ak." Another voice reached her ears, the same that had yelled in another language a few minutes ago.

The boy who held the knife hissed right in her face before putting it away. Sini let out a sigh of relief she didn't know she had been holding before looking around to find who had given the order.

It was another Na'vi, he seemed just a bit older than the one that was still holding her arm. He walked closer to the two of them, a stoic look on his face. Once he had reached them, the girl didn't know where to look. She felt intimidated by the boy's presence.

"What is your name?" He asked, emotionless.

"Sini." The girl answered, finally gathering the courage to look at him in the eyes.

"How did you get here?" Another question escaped his lips, a small accent noticeable as he spoke.

"I was chased by a Thanator and ended up hiding in the cabin." She mumbled but it was still understandable.

"It should have killed you!" The one holding her said in anger.

"Lo'ak!" The other said, smacking the back of the younger's head and earning a small grunt from him.

"It's true though, she should be dead." He explained, his grip tightening on the girls arm.

Sini looked at the two boys standing in front of her. They looked close. Brothers maybe?

"Don't kill me, I was just trying to find a safe place to spend the night." She blurted out.

Then, out of nowhere a sharp pain shot right through her left leg. She let out a small scream before falling to the ground. She looked at her left thigh and realized there was a huge cut on the front. It was bleeding and it was deep. Small pieces of broken glass were stuck to her skin and she understood how she had gotten the wound. It was when she had jumped through the window to enter the cabin, the adrenaline –at the time– too high for her to feel the pain.

But now that she had calmed down it was hurting.

"She's bleeding." Lo'ak –if she had understood correctly– said in the most uncaring way possible as he looked at the other boy.

"She needs to be healed." He answered, earning a shocked and confused stare from the other.

"We can't bring her home!" The younger yelled looking at Sini who was trying her best to remain immobile to not feel any more pain.

"I know, but I can't let her die here." He declared before leaning down and grabbing her, picking her up and walking to his ikran.

He made the bond and placed the girl in front of of him before he took off. She rested her back against the boy's torso. She felt weak, like she could die at any moment. She hated it because she felt like her old self again. Before she knew it she had passed out, exhaustion winning over her will to stay awake.

-

"You know that as soon as dad and mom see you, you're a dead man?" Lo'ak told his brother, anger still clear on his face. Neteyam let out a small 'I know' before focusing on where he was going as he watched the horizon carefully.

He knew he was going to be in great trouble the moment he would set a foot on the ground of his clan's territory. But something had drowned him to this mysterious girl. She seemed fearless as her bicolor eyes had plunged into his when he was questioning her. As Lo'ak had said back there, the Palulukan should have killed her but she had escaped. It was something not a lot of Omatikaya could do. So he just couldn't understand that some Avatar could do it.

With a sigh, Neteyam sped up toward the location of his clan, Lo'ak following close behind.

[starlit-hopes-and-dreams]

Word Find Tag

I was tagged by @outpost51 back in July 😅, thanks for your patience <3

My words: jaw, pass, direct, slump, shock

Your words: breathless, bite, bump, break, and brand

Open tag (im running out of tagging brain cells 😅)

Going back to Hidden Depths since I had to skip for the last one

Jaw

It was a little unfair. There should be proof. A visible reason for him to feel the way he did. Instead, it looked like he was crying over nothing. Resh surreptitiously wiped his eyes, but all he ended up doing was smearing the dirt and blood coating his hand on his face. Fucking pits. Fucking Marcus. Fuck it all. He clenched his jaw and balled his shirt up, eyeing the distance between his cell and Carr's.

Pass

The waiting was killing her. She couldn't remember the last time she'd slept. Or taken a breath that didn't send shards of anguish pulsing through her blood. Nykim had suggested she return to light duty. Pack business may distract her, he'd said. It would at least help pass the time while they waited for word from the palace. She laughed drily—what a fucking joke. All pack business was doing was pissing her off.

Direct

"He's not sick?" Orla asked, sounding relieved as she allowed Marcus to direct her away. Mieste glanced at the rest of them nervously, then tried to follow the prince. Captain Shein grabbed his arm before he could pass. "Let's see what's in your workroom, herbalist," the captain said grimly. Carr pushed past them all and ran. The smell got stronger and stronger, and she gasped, her breath like shards of glass in her lungs.

Slump

For fuck's sake—Resh begged with his eyes. Just say the words.  Rule number fucking four. Say whatever you need to say to save your skin. Pride got you killed. But Carr's eyes clouded over, and Resh's shoulders slumped. He couldn't even blame the kid. The kid's attitude was probably what had kept him alive, with as small and effeminate as he was. Carr looked at Marcus; his voice filled with venom when he spoke. "The fuck does it matter, you motherfuckin twat? You're gonna do whatcha want, anyways. People like you always do."

Shock

Carr jerked away, a breathless sob emerging, only to slam her back into the tunnel wall. The dull throb of her lash wounds erupted into nerve-searing agony, and she barely had the presence of mind to clap a hand over her mouth. She bit into her palm, hard, to keep from screaming. The shock worked like a reset button. As the pain in her back settled to a more tolerable level, Carr registered the musty smell of earth, felt the almost clay-like substance at her back. There was no stone in this tunnel. She couldn't work stone with her elemental ability. It was the reason she hadn't just opened the earth to swallow that asshole. That very dead asshole. If she kept telling herself that, eventually, her body would believe it.

[eeveearoace-creative]

my brain has been taken over by the kitty cats :,)

so, i've been working on this warriors fanfic, and i still have A LOT to go, but i wanna share my opening scene >:D

@saturnellaa and @stupidshinyevie since you said you wanted to see it :3 (ps, i might make a separate tag list for warriors content, so let me know if y'all would like that!)

cw: canon-typical angst (warrior cats)

Thunder rumbled in the dark, almost-black sky as Cherry raced down a path of gnarled, knotted roots of trees that were countless seasons, countless generations, older than she was. Heavy rain soaked her short white fur, chilling the young she-cat to the bone.

Suddenly, A streak of bright, yellow light shot through the dark sky, illuminating the stormy clouds overhead before dying out. Amber eyes narrowed against the sudden flash of light. Cherry hoped her kittens couldn’t feel her shudder.

Got to find shelter!

Cherry frantically sheathed and unsheathed her claws, clumps of mud sticking to her nails – she’d have to clean them out later. But there was something much more important on her mind, and even as yet another wave of agony ripped through her, leaving her swaying on unsteady paws, Cherry couldn’t, wouldn’t stop – she had to find shelter.

Paws slamming against the forest floor, Cherry’s nose twitched, desperately searching for anything the rain hadn’t drowned out yet. But nothing – all she found was the cold, wet smell of the rain pelting down around her, threatening to drown her like it had all the scent trails.

Lightning flashed overhead. Cherry clenched her teeth. She was not going to die here. They were not going to die here. Just a little bit more, just a little bit farther, and –

There!

Just barely visible before her, a half-fallen tree trunk rested against an outcropping of rock, leaving a gap just large enough to squeeze through. Cherry didn’t need to see to imagine the small, dry den on the other side, a soft moss bed laying within.

Not wasting another second, Cherry darted through the entrance of her den. Relief washed over her even as she trembled in pain, cold from the rain fully settled in her bones. Lowering herself into her moss bed, Cherry finally allowed herself a moment of rest.

The moment of rest was shattered less than a second later when agony once again tore through her body, sharp and hot like claws raking against her side. Still breathless from running, Cherry yowled in pain, the terrible sound ripping itself from her dry, sore throat.

Black dots danced across her vision. No, not now, Cherry thought, not when I just got us to safety! Not now, no...

More cries of anguish ripped themselves free as Cherry squirmed in agony, the world spinning around her. Her vision flickered as darkness ate away at her sight, the black lapping hungrily like water. She fought for breath, but her lungs refused to work, and she couldn’t breathe, she couldn’t breathe, she couldn’t breathe-

She had to hold on.

Cherry was suddenly acutely aware of a small, wet shape beside her. Her heart skipped a beat.

Before she could move towards it, however, another surge of pain shot through her, leaving her wailing in agony.

Another one.

Breathless and heaving with exhaustion, Cherry tried once more to move, to force herself to her paws, to do anything but just lie there, completely and utterly useless.

But she couldn’t. She had nothing more to give.

With one last heave, the tremors finally stopped.

Cherry gasped for air. Everything hurt. Her body begged for the rest she needed oh so badly, but she couldn’t, not yet, not when there was still something important to do.

“Hey there, little kittens,” Cherry mewed weakly, painstakingly dragging herself towards the tiny, helpless bundles. Licking them gently, her kittens took their first, gasping breaths.

Cherry’s heart bloomed with love. They were perfect.

A small, mewling cry rose from one of the kittens as they stuck their tiny head in the air. The two other kittens followed suit, joining the first in a chorus of wailing voices.

“Shh, shh,” Cherry protested, cleaning their tiny bodies with her tongue. “Hush.”

They didn’t listen.

Cherry’s head spun. Cleaning kittens was supposed to calm them down, right? Then why weren’t they calming down? What if they never calmed down? Cherry was going to be a terrible mother, her kittens were going to absolutely hate her, how did she already mess up so badly-

Oh. Her fur was still wet, wasn’t it?

After giving her side a few licks to warm it up after all the rainwater, Cherry returned to her kittens, trying not to panic as she focused on cleaning them.

The crying stopped.

Cherry blinked.

Her kittens had fallen asleep pressed against her side.

Purring, Cherry gave her kittens one last look before giving in to sleep.

[silkenblankets]

The job was done, red coated the scene and it felt like he could finally think. There was a moment of bittersweet silence, lowering his metal arm and taking in a deep breath. Gunpowder, it wasn't his first time smelling it. Every time before, that scent meant another piece of him was torn from his body, his identity would break into a smaller shard than before.

But it also meant freedom. The initial fear of pain dissolved, replaced by a sweet catharsis. He dropped the weapon, walking up to the body and lifting it's right hand. A handcrafted ring, silver band, with small grey stones beaded on either side of a slightly larger stone resting atop the finger. It came off with a good tug, inspecting the metal before attempting to place it on his own finger. The metallic surface didn't hold the ring, and so he opted to hide it in his only worldly possession: a small pouch of dice pulled tight around his artificial wrist.

Turning his back on his God, he left the home and everything that happened within it. He was lost, he was angry, he was doubtful. But he knew the driveway led to a road, a city was to the right. Or, something similar. He wasn't sure, but it was his only plan.

The road was endless, and unkempt. Despite the dullness of his touch, he could feel the loose asphalt under his feet, scuffing the metal and adding small dents to the form. It was cold, his jacket was the only thing keeping his body from shivering. Slightly oversized with tearing in the sleeves, the only clothing he could fit over the thick spikes worked into his prosthetics. He has always disliked the shape, now outright hating the form it gave him.

He could tell his legs would be sore by now, his hips already ached and his back hurt. The man's posture was more akin to a zombie, his body long since tired.

The moon had been thrown over him, completing its arc as he entered the small city. The sun had begun to emerge, everyone would be waking up soon. But not God. That felt nice to know... But the rattling in his foot signaled damage, he wanted to patch that up. Except he didn't have materials, or method.

Lifting his eyes from the ground, his gaze bounced from one building to the next. Maybe he could find someplace that fixed cybernetic limbs? Though, as far as he knew, nobody really had those. For whatever reason, he had been made the outlier, rather than another corpse in the frigid winter.

Oh, that looked promising. A building that looked more like a garage than the others, the inside showed displays of what looked to be assorted car parts. But it was small and cramped inside, the business wasn't big in the slightest. He tried to pull open the door, but found it was locked. Must be closed. He tried to plan for what time it would be open, hearing muffled footsteps and the scattered crunch of a latch. Feeling the door open, he backed away and stared at who opened it.

A short brunette wearing some kind of work jumpsuit, a name tag was embroidered on the fabric: Michael.

"Hey- do you need something? Are you okay?"

It took him a moment to process that he needed something, he needed to be fixed.

"Do you do repairs?" His metallic voice caused visible confusion in Micheal. "Yup. What for?"

"... My foot."

Michael looked down, skipping past the exposed hips and crouching to inspect the metal appendage. Tilting his head, he gave a confused smile. "It doesn't look that bad, I can fix that I suppose."

He nodded quietly, following the smaller man inside the building. Michael pulled a chair into the garage, which was empty as of now. Motioning to the seat, the cyborg sat down in silence. His foot was lifted and set on a crate, Michael went from one toolbox to the next before returning with a handful of material.

For once, he was grateful for his dulled touch, barely aware of the molten heat touching him. Michael must've found the silence uncomfortable, shifting his stance to look at the man. "What's your name?"

"..." Xavier was dirtied. He didn't know what other name he had. "... Xavi."

Michael smiled. "That's a pretty neat name." He glanced to the gashes in Xavi's jacket, clicking his tongue. "Hey would you like those shaved down? They look really uncomfortable."

Xavi looked at Michael, trying not to show his excitement. "... Can you do that?" He got a nod in response, the mechanic stood and pat Xavi's leg. "Of course, then we can put something on ya to keep you from freezing." The man smiled, holding out his hand.

"C'mon, it should only take a few minutes. Maybe I can get to know you better."

It felt... wonderful, to be a person again.

Xavi used the aid of Michael to pull himself back to his feet, his smile hidden behind his artificial jaw. "Thank you."

Michael gave the cyborg a quick, partial hug as he led him towards the rest of his tools. As he rummaged through the drawers, his smile returned.

"My pleasure, Xavi."

[sawamura-daichis-thighs]

Hi, how are you? I seen you in an ultrasound tag. And I seen you went to school for it. I was wondering if you could tell me your experience and if you enjoy it as a career?

Hi Anon, I'm good, thank you for asking! And absolutely, I’d be happy to. ^^

I live in the U.S., so requirements and program length may be different elsewhere, but in general most sonography programs are approximately 2 years (not including any prerequisite courses you'll need beforehand in order to apply). It is definitely a tough program! It takes a lot of dedication and determination and sometimes sheer force of will; I gave up the majority of my free time for 2 years to make room for the amount of studying that's required, was often pushed out of my comfort zone, and wondered more than once if I could truly achieve my goals, but in the end I feel it was 100% worth it.

I won't lie, sonography is a difficult field; at first, it kinda feels like "what do you mean these shades of gray make an image of actual anatomy, it all looks like blobs" but I promise that it eventually begins to make sense! It's such an exciting feeling when you look back after months of practice to realize that you've made visible, tangible progress and that now those "gray blobs" actually make sense as real anatomy. You get excited about the funniest things (my classmates and I would gush over a easily seen pancreas lmao I still do) and learn all kinds of cool, wacky things bodies can/might do.

My program included lecture courses, lab courses, and clinical rotations in real health care facilities. While they're all important, the clinical rotations were the most impactful for me because I learn best by being hands-on, which is exactly what those rotations are for. Lab time was great for learning the anatomy on generally healthy people (classmates) without many time constraints, with a teacher present to guide/answer questions, but clinicals introduce you to the general population who are, by and large, sick and/or in pain. It often introduces you to pathology that, until that point, you only see in lectures and books.

There are some important board exams required to become a registered sonographer: the SPI (Sonography Principles and Instrumentation) and a specialty board (Abdomen, OB/GYN, Vascular, etc.). Regardless of which specialty you want to go into, you must pass the SPI to become credentialed. I attached a link so you can research it further, but basically it's an exam that focuses on the physics that make ultrasound possible as an imaging modality. They’re difficult exams, designed so that you have to choose the “best answer” from multiple options that might technically be correct, so you have to read carefully. I have bad test anxiety, so I learned to skip anything I didn’t know immediately and come back to it after answering the rest. Also, trust your gut and refrain from changing your answers too often.

As far as my career, I'm still new at it. I've only been working as a registered sonographer for a little over 6 months, but, even with the challenges of working in health care, I love it. I like that I can work both independently and with a team; it’s nice to get my coworkers’ input/advice on things I’m not sure about or questioning. Every day is different. My hospital is super busy most days, but it offers a lot of room for obtaining experience due to the range of scans we perform. In an average week, I'll scan a mix of general abdomen (evaluating liver, gallbladder, kidneys, etc.), small parts (thyroid, scrotum), vascular (so many legs to rule out blood clots, whew), OB/GYN (lots of first trimester from the Emergency Room, and many second/third from patients in our Labor & Delivery unit), and we even perform procedures like biopsies. My hospital also has a NICU, where we scan infant brains or newborn kidneys or spines to evaluate for abnormalities. (Granted, not every hospital does all of this! We just happen to be one of the largest hospitals in an otherwise rural area so we're kind of a catch-all.) My ultimate goal is to become a travel tech, so I wanted to work somewhere that would help me gain a range of experience quickly.

As you can see, there's so many different possibilities with ultrasound! It's not just used for those who are pregnant, like a lot of people (myself included, initially) assume. If babies aren't your preference (which, same, they're super wiggly lol but cute regardless), you still have a wide range of options to choose from. I'd definitely recommend doing some research and asking for opportunities to shadow ultrasound techs near you, to get an idea of what they do and ask questions. (Unlike me, who literally Googled the profession before applying to my program with super limited knowledge on just what I was getting into lol thankfully it worked out and became something I love!)

[thecontumacious]

hi!! hello!! how are you? i hope you're having an amazing day/night :D i just saw that you're taking requests again so i have an idea that has been rotting my brain and because i really like your writing (you have me giggling and kicking my feet but i never said this) i thought it would be a good idea to ask you about it !!

anyways- my request is luxiem finding their s/o (who's usually on the quiet or less energetic side) dancing their heart out in the kitchen at like 3AM :'))

feel free to skip this request if you want to!!

The World All to Yourselves

a/n: I'M BACKKKK and it's summer holidays so i'll be going a bit crazy with reqs >w< god this character text limit thing is such a pain in the ass my hand is all cramped up from having to constantly reformat this TT

DISCLAIMER: concerning what had recently happened with vox and his community, i want to remind you again that this fic, existing fics and future fics are purely fiction and should not be seen as something to be projected irl. it's merely to entertain and also considered fanart. remember, this applies to not only vox. this applies to ALL of nijisanji and considerably, all other fandoms.

your boyfriend was on a business trip to meet up with the rest of the luxiem members for an off collab. and as much as he pleaded that you tag along, you heavy heartedly refused his offer with your work piling up on your shoulders like a mountain. it would take a week, he said, but it felt super long to you both.

you can see why he begged you to come with him. but well, duty calls and you can't exactly have everything you want in life. he would replace missing time with frequent calls when he's not streaming, video calling when possible with the rest of the members.

pain was visible in his eyes as he could only see you through a phone or laptop screen, so you always tell him that it won't be long that you'll reunite again. you keep reassuring him too that he'll have a lot of fun with the other members.

everything finally comes to an end and today is the day your v-tuber boyfriend will arrive home. unfortunately though, the flight he had to catch was scheduled for midnight and out of concern, he specifically asked you not to pick him up for safety reasons.

thus here you were, swirling your drink of choice in your hand as you looked out the kitchen window. the stars above twinkle every now and then as they watched you wait with anticipation for your beloved to come home.

you sigh, putting the glass aside before grabbing your phone. the house is too quiet, definitely because your boyfriend was not present. so, what do you do while waiting?

you open your music app.

Vox Akuma 👹🌹

fun as the off collab was with his beloved co workers, the strain on his shoulders heavily needed attention and tbh, so did his entire being after going so long without your sweet kisses and tight hugs

he really was going to bound you arms and legs next time this happens

an entire week without your adorable self under him

bah, not good :<

so he rushed his way home, thankfully earlier than he anticipated

knowing you, you were probably still awake so he snickered upon coming up with the idea of surprising you

he quietly shoves the key in and pushes the door open, pulling his suitcase with as little sound as possible

vox mostly expected you to be busy clunking around the apartment in your pajamas, watching a movie or a youtube video

not you shaking your ass to 'hope in the dark'

energetically rapping his part nonetheless

vox smirks, realizing he'd just discover the very rare moments of you like this

he knows you don't hide yourself from him, but seeing you truly be yourself with no one around?

it felt like falling in love with you all over again 

the cheeky demon lets go of his luggage near the door and makes himself comfortable by leaning in the kitchen doorway, just enough that you won't notice him immediately

arms crossed and a soft smile plastered on his handsome face, all the while you're still jamming through luca's verse

"throughout the night party time~!" you melodize, spinning around 360.

vox struggles to hold back his erupting laughter as you bop your head wildly to the drop, your feet stomping in sync with the beats

another idea lights up in the demon's head and he tiptoes his way over to you, just in time to get to his part of the song

"hey lady, how do you feel?" he sings

you turn around with a yelp, eyes wide and your heart on the floor

vox smirks, but he doesn't stop. "you can be anyone you want."

he pulls you by the waist until you're up against him. "don't be afraid and live your life."

his hands make it to your face and brings you until you're within a one inch proximity with him. "the world is full of hope."

blood raises to your cheeks and you suddenly don't remember what lyrics are next. but did it really matter at this point?

"hm? not gonna continue singing, love?" he smirks, leaning in so your nose brushes up against his. "you had so much fun."

"h-how long have you been watching, huh??" you hiss, pouting as you looked away. but vox is quick to pull your gaze back onto him by using his fingers

"just enough to see you have all the world to yourself, darling," he sighs, leaning pass your face and into the crook of your neck. "you looked absolutely gorgeous by the way. a shame i don't get to see it often."

you curl your lip, face still bright red from the embarrassment. but all you could do was wrap your arms around vox

"welcome home, love," you whisper, resting your head on his shoulder as you tug onto his coat. "was the trip alright?"

"and you're gonna ignore my words, sweet thing?" vox pulls away and for a moment, you feel weak in the knees with the gaze that rained down upon you

then you feel him push you back until you hit the kitchen counters, his hand snug on the tabletop with you where he exactly wanted you to be

pinned against him, flushed and completely helpless

"v-vox..."

"hm? what is it, my love?" his finger goes to your temple and he gently slides it down your face

"ar-aren't you tired from the jetlag?" you whisper, his face inching closer again within seconds. "co-come on... let's get you to bed."

his hand drops and grabs something behind you, then realizing that he had taken your phone. he scrolled through it, making you raise your eyebrows

before you could ask, 'fly me to the moon' starts playing and somehow, this makes you much redder than when he pinned you against the counter

vox grins cheekily, grabbing you by the waist and pulling you both to the center of the kitchen

"let's dance a bit, darling. i've missed you," he breathes against your ear

you sigh and just follow along, admittedly wanting the exact same from how touch deprived you were this past week

vox grabs your hand and has the other placed on his shoulder before he starts swaying to the music

it was no surprise he knew some moves, being at least 400 years old

nothing else made a sound, nothing but the music and occasional creaking of the floorboards. the world seemed so quiet. like... it belonged to only you and vox.

you sink into his hold more, a smile creeping onto your face

you were at home in this crazy world, in the arms of your demon lover

"i love you," you mumble

you feel the rumble of his chuckle then slowly pulling away, grabbing your face into his hands ever so gently

he leans in for that long awaited kiss, passionate and lingering. "i love you too, darling."

other boys utc!

Mysta Rias 🦊🔶

mysta's body felt like it could collapse at any given moment, his nose stuffing up and the wind hitting his body a little too briskly tonight

"goddammit why do i always gotta be sick after these things??" he hisses to himself, stumbling down the hallway and half assed-ly shoving the key into the apartment

sure, he might feel like shit rn and the jetlag was too much for him to handle, but he's reminded of you once the smell of your apartment reached his nostrils

the tension built on his back dissolves almost immediately and mysta is quick to fantasize about cuddling you until morning

or forever maybe

he's about to call out to you, announcing his arrival when he hears your voice booming throughout the apartment, singing lyrics all too familiar to him

"don't hide what you wanna do, come on dadadadibadoo~" you muse. "get all things i want, i wanna do, wanna do, wanna do!"

mysta lets out a quiet snort, utterly shocked but also very humored by this new side of yours

compared to mysta, he was definitely the chaotic one in the relationship. he'd randomly sing lyrics out loud while you just laughed at his silliness

safe to say it's his turn now

maybe he should arrive unannounced more often...

mysta tiptoes to the source of your voice, the kitchen he thought

when he peeps through the doorway, you are indeed singing 'hope in the dark' like you had no cares for the world, all the while using a wooden spoon as your makeshift microphone

a wide, cheshire cat like grin reaches mysta's face and he can't hold back his laughter

it's only because you're not facing him that you hadn't stopped

"you don't have to say anything, because i can feel your all," you sing again, spinning around

the scene becomes too much for the detective can handle and his hand slips into his pocket, pulling out his phone before discreetly recording you

"throughout the night party time!"

mysta's eyes start to water, both out of amusement and the fact you looked so adorable at this very moment

there's only so much of you mysta gets to actually see on a day to day basis. and he understood that!

call him greedy or selfish though, because this is the side mysta would love to see a lot more

dancing like no one was watching (excluding him ofc) and singing one of your favorite songs, admittedly the one that prompted you to have fun and for once be careless of what the world tells you

at least, that's what 'hope in the dark' had personally taught mysta

unfortunately something pokes inside his nose, nudging his nerves and provoking the desperate need to sneeze

"holy fuck not now--" he hisses, but before he can attempt to hold it back, said sneeze comes and evidently ruins everything. "aChOO!"

you shriek, pointing your absolutely dangerous wooden spoon at the stranger who just sneezed behind you. "mysta??"

"aCHOO!" he wheezes, his nose stuffing up again. "ah dammit"

"could you have at least knocked, you ass? i could've beat you to a pulp with this spoon," you quickly reach over for a tissue, handing it over to your sick boyfriend

mysta giggles sheepishly, graciously taking it and blowing into it to hopefully clear up his sinus infection. "scary, babe."

"terrifying, if anything," you grin. you are about to pull him in for a tight hug when you noticed his phone, turned on and... on the camera recording?

your eyes widen with panic. "MYSTA WERE YOU--"

immediately realizing what you were fretting over, mysta laughs and pulls his phone away from you, raising it up high above so you wouldn't reach it

"ah, ah, ah, nope," he grins, you pouting as he was incredibly tall. "this is for me."

"MYSTA FUCKING RIAS DELETE THAT!!" you flail your arms while jumping, attempting to reach the damned device but to no avail.

you huff, crossing your arms. "fine. don't expect me to take care of that cold."

at that, mysta pauses.

you smirk, "well?"

"awee come on... just this one, please?" now he's the one curling his lip, pleading. you roll your eyes. he sighs, "okay, okay. just do this one thing with me okay?"

you raise your eyebrows as you watch him pocket his phone, walking pass you to reach for your phone on the countertop. he scrolls through your playlist and plays a song familiar to both you and him

"G4L?"

"come on, let me dance with you this once. you dancing around made me wanna do the same," mysta smiles, his empty hand beckoning you to come closer

unlike before there's a soft glimmer in his eye, so you sigh, taking his hand

once the beat got even more erratic, mysta starts bouncing on his feet, bopping his head while his shoulders shook in sync with the music

mysta was many things, being a dancer was not one of them unfortunately

but... somehow, as his terrible movements continued, your grin widened and you had the urge to move with him

you can't lie. mysta's taste in music was fantastic.

after a while, you finally decide to lose yourself in the music, shaking your hips and head to the beat

"yeah!" mysta smiles, taking your hands so you moved together this time. "you're doing good, y/n!"

"can't say the same about you, mysta!"

despite the jab, he laughs wholeheartedly and does not proceed to stop

it felt like a small party between you two, the stars above watching you begin to sweat from the rapid movements. you and him mouth the lyrics too, making it all the more entertaining

when the chorus finally came around, you and mysta completely lose it and danced to your heart's content

you could tell he was genuinely having a good time, his face glowing brightly

and to mysta, he's never felt more at home at this very moment.

he knew that you were the one as you let all inhibitions and insecurities go, showing but your raw and beautiful self

he held your hand and pulled you in, placing a chaste kiss on your lips.

you giggle, pushing him off, "you're sick mysta! don't spread your germs on me!"

"oh shit right," he laughed, sniffling. but all that is forgotten as you and him danced some more that night

that video in his phone staying there for who knows how long :)

Luca Kaneshiro 🦮🔆

when i say he ran, he fucking bolted to your apartment bcs out of all the luxiem members, he's definitely the clingiest

it should be no surprise that he's super excited to see you again (especially after you insisted to him many times that he should save the private jets back home in fear that he'll get too exhausted)

but it was late where you were, thus why luca had decided not to call you upon stepping off the kaneshiro's private jet

he could just imagine you snuggled up with augustus asleep, waiting for him to come home

he might not look like it, but even luca kaneshiro's social battery can start to dwindle a bit

a night in with you in his arms, watching some movies (or his vods) or play some games felt like it could beat anything else

"ahhh thank god i'm finally home," he grins, his hand reaching the knob to the already unlocked door

but luca pauses.

"gonna start the game of love, i wanna shake your body and soul~"

luca turns to his watch: 2:57 AM

"jesus, what are they doing still awake? singing this loud too?" he chuckles to himself, choosing to open the door anyway

he steps inside, you still singing your heart out to 'hope in the dark' in the kitchen

with your back turned towards him, of course you don't immediately notice luca watching you wiggle your butt to his group's song

he crosses his arms, a huge grin on his face

proud almost?

how could he not be? look at you xixixi

"どうしようもなくキミの傍にいたい" you tune out again

luca then quickly steps forward, wrapping his arms around your waist while continuing to sing, especially since it was part of his song

"lonely lady shall we dance? i wanna make your heart smile," he sang along, spinning you around. "throughout the night party time!"

when luca starts dancing to the song, you can't help but be more amused than surprised by his arrival, covering your mouth as he continues to move while still holding you

"come on, hon, dance with me!" luca requests, swinging your hands around in an attempt to have you move too. shy and still quite startled by him coming in, you dance along minimally

"don't be shy, babe. you were dancing a lot more before i came in," he teases, evidently making you limit your movements even more

"sh-shut up, luca! you weren't supposed to see that," you mumble, pouting as you stopped dancing completely

luca sighs, grabbing your hands so that you fall onto his chest. "you were really cute though... i just wanted to have fun with you."

your face wasn't looking at him, but with his tone and his words alone, you knew that he was genuinely a bit disappointed

your heart ached to be honest, but you were also incredibly shy on dancing anymore since he caught you

his hands then make it to your hair, stroking it down all the while his other held onto your waist tightly. it was as though like you'd just slip away

it might've felt like that this entire week to him

ahhh poor baby

in an attempt to comfort his deflated heart, you lean back and press a kiss to his jaw, smiling, "welcome home, luca. i missed you."

you feel him chuckle, his hold onto you tighter. "i missed you more."

your fingers make it to his blonde locks and it was your turn to be combing through them. "i could feel it even from thousands of miles away, love. but i'm glad you're here with me now."

"me too."

luca pulls away from you, his hands now meeting your cheeks. you felt ever so safe in them, even more so that he's been gone this entire week. you melt into his touch.

"man, you look too cute like this," he muses, his lip curling as you laughed. "i knew i should've just packed you in my suitcase."

"maybe you should've, luca."

"i'll hold onto that promise, y/n!"

you giggle away, but then it dies down upon seeing luca intensely gazing at you. you tilt your head, worried, "luca?"

"i know you're shy about this but you know... " he trails off, looking away. "c-can i dance with you? j-just this once, i promise! i won't force you to do it again!"

this man had just traveled half the world for work and the moment he comes back, he doesn't immediately rest. all he wanted at the end of the day was to share a somewhat solitary moment with you, dancing to music you and him favored

were you really going to refuse him?

nope. not when luca is the one asking.

you sigh, wrapping your arms around his neck. "alright, fine..."

and just like that, the familiar light returns to luca's lavender eyes. he's quick to grab your phone again and begins to explore through your playlist, probably looking for a song to dance to

"oh, it just had to be this song, huh luca?" you pout, your heart wrenching at the nostalgic feeling of the chosen song

"i thought 'hope in the dark' was too energetic. sooo i chose something slower! you and i love this song anyway," luca smiles, putting down the device as he pulled you tight against him once more

"i can't argue with you," you smile, starting to sway to the slow music. upon seeing you move under your own initiative, luca grins. happiness overflows from within his heart.

"i never knew you were the someone waiting for me," you softly tune, looking into luca's eyes. "cause we were just kids when we fell in love."

"not knowing what it was," luca continues, following you. "i will not give you up this time."

never. i never will. luca thought to himself.

"luca, why are you crying, baby?"

he blinks and you're right. warm tears fall from his eyes but the smile on his face never leaves.

"you're perfect for me is all. and i'll never ever leave your side, y/n," he rests his forehead onto yours. and what does he see? his future, his love, his world, his everything. all in his arms.

you may be shy, a bit timid and sometimes can't keep up with his wilder nature. but you're strong yet so comforting. the home he had been looking for.

luca leans down to kiss you, all his overflowing happiness sealed in the loving gesture. "i love you, y/n. so, so much."

tears start to prick your own eyes as you smile, "i love you too, luca. so, so much."

Ike Eveland 🖋💙

ike eveland wanted nothing more than to just collapse, preferably in your arms at this very moment

the offcollab was fantastic of course! but there's only so much ike can take so once everything had finally wrapped up, he was ready to hibernate

it didn't help that the airport was so quiet and the sky outside was dark

literally the perfect setting to fall asleep in

he honestly wished you'd come to pick him up, but it was the dead of night (almost morning even). there was no way he was gonna make you get out of bed just to get him

so with what energy he has left from the day, he hails a cab back home

even the sight of the building was enough to motivate him to at least change into pajamas later

ike finally reaches the door to your apartment, turning on the knob and pulling his suitcase in.

usually you'd be near the door to wait for him. but it's because of your absence that it makes ike long for you even more

he kicks off his shoes and is on his way to the bedroom to find you when he hears the familiar tunes to his song

and most importantly, you rapping to his part

"are you gonna go? canvas is still blank. but do it right you're gonna gain or pain. ideal and ambition, white darkness, hope in the dark~"

a chuckle stumbles out of ike's mouth and his once droopy eyes shot open for this moment. he tiptoes around and finds out you're in the kitchen

not only were you rapping, but your legs brought you all over the inches of the kitchen floor, happily dancing to 'hope in the dark' without much thought if you looked terrible

ike leans onto the doorway, crossed his arms as he watched you quietly

"wanna have a chance you will see what i mean, stay real, dance in the dark. make it a showtime it gives you luck. spend your life don't believe the hype!"

and ike doesn't even attempt to stop you

the exhaustion weighing on his back suddenly lifts off and he knows it's because of you

you and your little energetic movements at 3 am, you :<

there's a certain beauty unfolding before him. it didn't matter at all that you were in your old shirt, hair messy and your movements were not world class.

but the way you brought yourself made you look so much more attractive, like you were somehow enchanting him like the first time you met him

ike eveland at this very moment had never felt so happy and admittedly, proud that you agreed to be his. you, this beautiful being that had descended on to the earth just for him.

it's only when the song finishes that ike finally makes his presence known by clapping his hands gently

you shriek, backing onto the kitchen countertops

ike chuckles, "you sure had fun there, sweetheart."

blood rushes to your cheeks and you feel like jumping off a building right now

"we-welcome back, ike!" you smile sheepishly, bringing your hands together to hide the fact you were shaking out of embarrassment. "how was the trip home?"

"it was alright," he steps forward with the most innocent beam on his face. but don't be fooled. he does not have the purest of intentions now that he's caught you.

"i-ike, don't," you warn him, backing away even more

"don't what?"

"wh-whatever you're going to do!"

"i'm not doing anything!" ike laughs, raising his hands up. "you're being paranoid."

"not when my safety is on the line!" you pout. "now stay back until you can prove you're innocent!"

"sweetheart, i don't know what you're talking about. i am innocent. also, i just came home. all i want to do is just get some rest with you," now he's the one pouting

with that in mind, you groan, crossing your arms. you hesitate, but you open your arms anyway for ike. "alright, fine. come here."

he lets out a giggle as he wrapped himself in your hold, nuzzling into your neck like a bear cub finding refuge in its mother's fur

"thanks, sweetie," he mumbles. "i missed you."

"me too, ike."

...

"can i ask you a favor? just one, y/n."

your heart drops. but you breathe out, "what?"

"dance with me?"

you knew this day would come with this man

ike snickers, "i guess you were right in being paranoid."

"you're lucky i love you, you know?"

the man lets out another amused laugh, reaching for your phone. his finger swipes along your many selections of music, a mixture between yours and his favorite songs

then he settles on one

"awe man, this song? really ike?" you frown, ike placing the device back down

"i've always wanted to ballroom dance to this you know," ike admits, taking one of your hands in his and the other on his shoulder as per how ballroom dancing should be. then he looks you in the eye, joking but somewhat serious, "at our wedding, perhaps?"

"ike!" your cheeks return to being red once again.

"i don't hear any objections," ike ignores you, all the while grinning and pulling you towards the center of the kitchen. "come, älskling."

he's leading you, circling at the appropriate times and helping you step along. you might've stepped on his feet a few times, but honestly, the fact that you were trying for him made ike forget the pain

"ah, sorry!"

"it's alright, y/n."

as you struggle to keep up with ike, all he sees is your focused expression. adorable and absolutely too much for him to handle. he could imagine it, you know?

you and him dancing to the same ghibli song, but with time, he believed you'd be able to get the steps. yours and his hair grey, skin wrinkling with the years, but the same smiles and song.

"ike?"

"hm?" he turns to you.

"you were spacing out."

"oh," ike chuckles, squeezing your hand. "i'm fine. just having the time of my life."

Shu Yamino 🔮✨

(let's pretend that shu made it to their offcollab this time okay ;-;)

there really was nothing like the feeling of finally meeting up with your long distance friends/co workers.

and nothing like the feeling of not being able to interact with you in person for seven days straight.

shu doesn't seem like it, but he's clingy at heart and every time he has to end a video call with you, his finger finds it incredibly hard to actually press the end button

there were enough nights where you two would fall asleep in a video call together and have your phones dead by the morning (an inconvenience for you tbh since you had places to go to)

the other luxiem boys absolutely notice him getting distracted by the smallest of notifications popping up from his phone, ones that weren't even from you

so the moment everyone decided to wrap things up, shu is first to finish packing his things and bidding farewell

back to you

tired as he was the entire trip home, there was not a time he stopped thinking about you

were you asleep? watching a movie? playing on your phone? did you eat enough today? had enough water?

"i'm going crazy because of them," he mumbles to himself, a dazed grin decorating his face as he watched the sky through the airplane window

then, shu is finally in front of the door. luggage in hand and his heart open

he shoves the key in and turns the knob, letting himself in along with his suitcase in tow

"cutie? you awake?" shu calls out, softly at first afraid that you might actually be asleep. but when he expected to hear a 'welcome home, shu' or nothingness because you were asleep, his ears instead catch wind of... you singing to his part in 'hope in the dark'

"you don't have to say anything, because i can feel your all~" you melodize, and even from the sound of your voice, he could tell you were smiling. "throughout the night party time!"

then the sound of feet stomping on the floor in beat with 'hope in the dark'

you were many things

but shu never figured you were this silly

and to be doing this in the literal dead of night just-

the sorcerer lets out a snort, deciding to tiptoe to wherever you were. he needed to see this before he was never given this opportunity ever again

and indeed there you were, stomping your feet according to the song all the while sliding around and your head shaking at the right tempo

also was that a whisk you were using as your microphone...?

"HOPE IN THE DARK~~~"

his heart felt like it was going to burst at any point and time just seeing you so adorable, shaking your head around like it was nobody's business

but most importantly, he was incredibly happy that you could spare yourself some time to simply have fun like this

shu is very well aware himself that time keeps running in this world. the universe won't ever stop for you. but with this in mind, it's very easy to forget to make time for yourself in this crazy place

make time to just forget about things for a bit, forget that your flaws and worries exist

so to see you, one of the most important (if not the most important) person in his life do this...

sigh, he has never felt more glad

and tbh?

he wanted to join in on the fun

shu knocks on the doorway and you immediately freeze up, turning around slowly with a pale face like you'd just hear a ghost creeping up on you

your lover merely chuckles at you, "sorry, is this where the party is supposed to be?"

"sh-shu h-hi!" you look at your whisk and immediately put it behind your back, a very embarrassed smile and cheeks extremely flushed. "welcome back, babe!"

"hi to you too, cutie," shu comes in the kitchen and opens his arms to you. "where's my welcome home kisses and hugs?"

"al-alright you big baby."

you know he's just teasing you, especially with that stupid whisk you just picked up :/ damn sorcerer just wanted to see you put it away awkwardly

so you place it on the countertop behind you and collapse into him, though a bit tense from the fact he literally caught you dancing in a frenzy like that...

"relax, baby."

ah he noticed

you giggle nervously in response, "i-i'm fine..."

shu pulls away slightly so he can properly see you. he sends you a knowing smile, "you're so cute, baby. there's no need to be shy. you seemed to have so much fun too."

he then cups your cheeks, your lips curling up from the mild pressure

"it made me fall in love with you again."

"i--" you look away, escaping his immediate gaze. "you're so cheesy, shu..."

"you like it though," shu tilts his head so that you're forced to look him in his purple eyes again. "oh hey! i have an idea."

he lets go of you and he pauses the music playing from your phone, changing it entirely it seems. his eyes hover over the list of songs and his eyes brighten at the sight of the one he found interesting

"oohh! salamander!!" you smile

"see? i knew you'd like the sound of it," shu chuckles, putting your phone down by the counter again before grabbing your hands and bouncing slightly on his heels. "come on! we haven't listened to this song in a while!"

"shu..."

but before you can protest anymore, shu sends you a quick wink and starts singing along to the energetic song. he absolutely does not forget to shimmy his way through too, making you laugh

this might've been because shu's natural charm or the fact that he's a sorcerer capable of doing otherworldly things, but you follow along

even mouthing the lyrics with him and matching his steps, your heart and laughter forgetting the tensity of your embarrassment from before

in shu's eyes, he's more than glad he got to see you again and this is the first thing he does upon stepping into the apartment

you and him together forgetting about the world. nothing but yourselves, the laughter and the present sleepy hours of the day.

once the song ends, you're out of breath from the dancing and somehow, this makes you look so much more beautiful, especially with the after effect of such euphoric moments

before shu could even realize it, he's pulling you by the wrist and placing his lips on yours, pushed by the moment

ah it's been so long... he thought, detaching from you for just a moment. shu laughs when your face is once again red.

"sorry, you just... looked so pretty. and i missed you so much."

I WILL SAY THIS AGAIN:

DISCLAIMER: concerning what had recently happened with vox and his community, i want to remind you again that this fic, existing fics and future fics are purely fiction and should not be seen as something to be projected irl. it's merely to entertain and also considered fanart. remember, this applies to not only vox. this applies to ALL of nijisanji and considerably, all other fandoms.

Masterlist!

[prettyboykatsuki]

»» — { ♡ } —— { ♡ } —— { ♡ } — ««

tell me again | e. kirishima 

➳ tags ;; fem!reader, disgustingly tooth rotting fluff, super cliche confession scene, kinda fuckboy kiri

➳ wc ;; 1.4k

➳ a/n ;; sometimes you just gotta write some corny fucking romance tropes man. 

➳ plot ;; after kirishima ghosted you post your confession, you don’t really plan on seeing him again. naturally when he shows up to your dorm during finals week - you’re not exactly sure what to do. 

»» — { ♡ } —— { ♡ } —— { ♡ } — ««

A knock on the door of your shared dorm room startles you out of a late night study session. At this time of night and during finals week - you don’t find yourself to be all that excited for whoever's at the other side. Your R.A., Iida is known for being a stickler and whatever news he brings won’t be good. 

You look over your shoulder at Mina, who instead of studying, has been playing 2048 on her laptop for the last hour. She looks back at you with an exasperated sigh leaving her lips, promptly pushing her laptop to the side. 

“Why is it always me who answers the door?” she groans. 

“Because you chose to study business,” you reply without missing a beat. She flips her middle finger off at you without a second thought but your nose is too deeply buried into your materials for you to care. 

The knocking gets more frantic as the seconds pass. 

“Coming!” she shouts it, irritation already filling her at whoever would be on the otherside. She swings it open, irritated beyond belief. In the midst of her preparing to cuss out whoever was on the other side at this hour, only a quarter of her sentence makes it out of her mouth. 

“Who the hell is -,” she stumbles, pauses. The words don’t even halfway make it out of her mouth before she blinks twice before stumbling back “Kirishima?” 

At this, your head snaps up to look behind you. You know you’re not visible from the door way, your desk opposite of view but you look anyway. You can’t see him but you can hear his voice. 

“Mina, hey - uh, is Y/N here? It’s uhm.. shit, I need to,” 

Mina crosses her arms above her chest, blocking Kirishima when he tries to look over her shoulder. You’re frozen in place and you think anyone in your position would be. 

Your.. relationship with Kirishima is complicated at best. You’d know him since you were freshman and after this semester, you’d managed to work out the courage to confess your feelings to him. You were certain he felt them back for you, ignoring his somewhat notorious reputation in hopes he was being genuine. He seemed awfully genuine to you. 

As it would be, you were met with rejection. It hurt but you weren’t worried about it either way. What you wanted was to remain friends, because Kirishima is awfully important to you. A confession shouldn’tve had made so much of a difference. You wished that’d been the case, anyway. 

But he.. left you like that. Left your friendship at the weird wits end where even when you saw each other on campus or elsewhere - there was no greeting. No hello or how are you. Uncomfortably, you faded into being strangers and you haven’t spoken to him in months.

“She’s not here,” 

Kirishima’s face twists up at the words. He looks over, just peers and shakes his head. 

“I can see the little colored lights that she keeps on to focus are on. I know she’s here. Please just let me talk to her,”

Mina turns her head slightly to make eye-contact with you. You shake your head softly, uninterested in what he has to say. Your heart feels too heavy. You know it’s kind of stupid but the wound feels fresh. Never-ending in how it aches. 

Mina doesn’t budge. 

“She doesn’t want to talk to you. Fuck off back to your dorm and leave us alone,” 

Mina pushes in on the door but he sighs, sticking his hand in even when she pushes in on it. He curses under his breath at the weight of it on his hand. Mina’s eyes go wide. 

“What the fuck are you -” 

“I know you can hear so I’ll just say it, shit” ― he curses under his breath but you catch ― “Even if Mina crushes my hand, please don’t though. You both know I don’t have health insurance,” 

You crack a warbly smile at the comment and Mina lets up but doesn’t open the door up. She keeps her hand steady on his, letting him writhe in mild pain. 

“I love you,” 

You freeze and so does Mina. Kirishima rests his forehead on the door with a soft sigh. Your heart skips a beat or two. You can’t keep track. 

“I know I fucked this up like.. really bad. When you told me you had feelings for me, at first it was.. I don’t know. It was like I couldn’t believe you,” 

You bite back tears as you listen to him. He can hear people in the rest of the dorm start to peek out but he doesn’t seem to stop.

“Shit, it was you. Not be corny but fuck like.. how the hell could I ever believed you liked me? Of all people, you chose me with a shitty fuckboy reputation and stupid haircut,” he laughs a little at this and so do you. 

“Kirishima..”  Mina mumbles

“It was too much. Like you’re so.. so much. But not in a bad way. Like the idea of being with you was just so damn overwhelming. And Bakugou told me not to be an idiot and ghost you but I was just so.. so scared,” 

You can hear the way his voice shakes. 

“I’ve never been with anyone seriously before and I’m kind of an idiot and I didn’t wanna fuck it all up. Like what if you realize half-way that it’s not me you want? What if.. what if we started dating and you realized that it was some kind of mistake?” 

“Eijirou...”

He smiles a little. The sound of your voice is soft like he remembers. He thinks it might be worth Mina breaking his hand if he gets to see you. 

“It was easier to break it off before it got serious, that’s what I thought. But then we didn’t talk for a few months and I was goin fuckin’ crazy thinking about you,” ― he laughs at the memory, drunk and dizzy from it ― “You don’t think you can miss one person so much. That just one person could mean so much to you.. like you’re incomplete without them there,’ 

You sniffle, wiping tears you hadn’t realized had fallen from your cheeks. 

“I think I’m in too deep. It was already too serious. I already.. loved you. I thought it’d be better if I just fucking.. ran here and told you,”  ― Mina opens the door up and steps to one side as you stumble towards it, tear eyed and in loose pajamas. Not confession ready in the least  ― “I thought maybe I’d get lucky and I’d have a chance of you at least.. forgiving me. Maybe if I was really lucky, you’d still like me too,” 

He shoves his hands in his pockets and stares at you, mouth curved into a half smile. So sincere, like always. You wonder to yourself if there would ever be a way to love him less. 

“So uhm.. I’m sorry. And I love you.. and it’d be sick if you like.. loved me back but it’s not necessary. I’ll do whatever you want just.. I dunno. Be in my life again, maybe?”

You run into his arms but he catches you. You’re a half conscious mess, sniffling into him as you punch his shoulder. He chuckles but hugs you back, wincing as you hit him. 

“Of course I love you, you stupid asshole,”  ― you whine, hugging him even tighter  ― “Your timing is shit, y’know that? Stupid -” 

He pulls back and leans into you. Lets his mouth bump into yours clumsily until you melt into a placating kiss. It’s all too much Kirishima - a gentle swipe of tongue and sharp teeth. Sweet but not enough. When he pulls away, he kisses the corners of your mouth. He’s too good at that, you think. 

“I know, but.. that’s why you like me right?” 

You roll your eyes, opting to keep clinging to him instead of replying. From behind you, Mina sighs. 

“I’m glad you stopped being a jackass but how the hell did you make it up here without Iida noticing,” 

From outside, there’s two loud but distinct voices. It’s Kaminari, screaming and Iida screaming back. When Mina walks over to peer outside, she catches an eyeful of a very naked and very drunk blonde. She cackles. 

“Uh.. I’ll just say I owe Kami a ton of money right mow,” 

»» — { ♡ } —— { ♡ } —— { ♡ } — ««

[padme-parker]

Mizpah // the darkling x f!reader // ch 6

summary: given some time alone to think, the pieces begin to fall into place. you go to confront the darkling be he avoids you at any given cost, until one night you go into the one room you were never granted permission to enter.

warnings: cursing, talks about violence/torture and death, alcoholism

A/N: the truth finally comes out. This is all over the place bc I was trying to rush getting it out. 5.9k+ words and 12 pages later, here we are. not proofread, will comeback later to edit.

ANA KUYA’S voice echoed in the back of your mind as you laid on your cot, calling out for Mal and Alina as they ran away from her. It was the day Grisha came to the orphanage to find out if one of their own had been whisked away into a place like this. You examined the walls, cracks running up and down them. The windows barely opened, and when they did, they let out horrible screeches. Water leaked from the bathrooms, the annoying drip a constant on your mind.

Maybe you should’ve gotten up from your bed and got tested by a Grisha. Maybe then you wouldn’t have had to stay in such a run down orphanage. The Duke was rarely here, so no one really cared about his orphanage no matter how infamous he was. But being Grisha meant leaving Mal and Alina behind, something you couldn’t do because they had become your only family. Besides, Grisha don’t get sick, therefore you weren’t a Grisha.

You could never be a Grisha.

-

AS you phased into consciousness, you could hear someone muttering something in the background. Your hands were so cold, you reached out for something- anything that could give you warmth. You tried to blink away the blurriness of your eyes, nothing seemed to work. The person rushed to your side, clutching both of your hands in one as the other stroked your cheek.

“Go back to sleep.” He said, brushing your hair back. Closing your eyes, he assumed you had fallen asleep already. He resumed his mumbling, the words slowly becoming coherent as fell back asleep.

“It’s...too...soon..”

-

THE painful pounding of your heart had subsided as the Grisha left. Mal walked into the room followed by Alina, who was sporting a new wound on her palm that Ana Kuya had scolded her for.

“Come on, get up!” Mal urged, knowing from the look on your face that the pain had already left you.

“Where are we going?” You said eagerly, scooting to the front edge of your bed to lace up your boots.

“To the meadow.” That was all you needed to hear before running out the bedroom door. Mal and Alina’s footsteps padding behind. The three of you started a mildly competitive game of tag, the other two making sure you didn’t exert yourself.

In that moment, you were who you were supposed to be. Three children lying on the field, making stupid promises to each other.

“We can’t hide forever, but we can run.”

-

THIS time when you find yourself in a field, there’s a man laying next to you. It was the same man from your dream, shoulder length hair and clean shaven face.

“Aleksander?” He lets out a hm, awaiting your question. “Where am I?”

“What do you mean, my darling?” Aleksander- General Kirigan- or whoever the hell he was turned to look at you, laying one of his arms upon your stomach. His hand keeping a firm grip on your waist. From your peripheral view you could see him studying you.

He started with your eyes, taking in their color and your long lashes. He moved from the curve of your nose until he got to your soft, plump lips. You stared at the sky, afraid of what you would see, who you would recognize if you turned to face him.

“We’re at our meadow.”

-

WHEN you finally regain consciousness, you find yourself alone in a nearly dark room. Only one lantern had been lit up. It was just before dawn, you could see the sun beginning to peek out. Someone had changed you into a nightgown, you didn’t know who it was. Perhaps it was Alina or maybe the Darkling, maybe neither. Either way, you were thankful they decided to change you out of the robe you had fainted in.

With great struggle, you propped yourself up, your elbows taking the brunt of your weight. You crawled to the foot of your bed to put on your night slippers. The rug under your bed only went so far before it hit the cold floor. You slowly made your way to the desk, sitting yourself in front of the mirror.

The magic Genya had performed on you days ago had worn out by now. How long were you out for? The dark circles under your eyes had returned, seemingly worse. Your skin, although already dull, became more dull and pale. Whatever shine you originally had was gone. Your eyes look sunken in. While your hair was frail and also lost the shine that Genya gave it.

“Saints..” You whispered to yourself as you raked a hand through your hair. You were basically a dead person walking. You considered fetching a servant to bring you Genya, but decided against it. Throwing on a robe, you silently made your way to the war room, hoping to find the Darkling there. When you entered it remained empty, along with the bed he usually slept in. You walked the halls looking for one of his oprichniki, yet they weren’t around either.

There was no use in barging into his bedroom when it seemed like he was gone. Plus you didn’t want to invade his privacy knowing that he could have you killed for going into his room without permission if someone had seen you. You spotted one of the palace guards, walking up to him as you placed your hands into the pockets of your robe.

“Excuse me, do you happen to know where the General is?” You asked, staring into the guards eyes.

“He left a week ago, accompanied by his personal guards.” Was all he said, not disclosing why he had left. A week? Had you really been unconscious for a week? This usually never happened to you, not like this.

“Do you know when he’ll be back?”

“In a couple of days.” He said, not giving you an exact day. You quickly thanked him before making your way back to your room to change for the day. The dull ache of your heart was finally leaving, allowing for you to feel more like yourself. You were able to spot the sun in the sky as you finished changing. You thought about basking in its light when your stomach growled loudly.

I suppose I should eat, you thought. It’d been nearly a week since you were able to feed yourself, your last meal being breakfast. You could remember someone feeding you periodically throughout the week, now knowing the Darkling had left, it was most likely Alina. You rang for a servant, asking to be brought breakfast when she arrived. Surveying the room, you decided that the Darkling wouldn’t mind if you did a little retouching.

You moved the table towards the window, wanting to eat in the sunlight without having the harsh winter winds freeze you. Opening the curtain allowed for more sunlight to stream through, a grunt of triumph leaving your lips as you looked at your new setup.

The squeaky wheel of the servant’s cart alerted you of her presence, rushing to open the door before she could knock. You took the tray from her hands, closing the door with your foot as you skipped towards the table, eager to get some food in your system.

The food they had given you was practically the same, sweet pea porridge, a tall glass of water, and a bowl of grapes. It wasn’t your favorite, but you ate it anyway. Savouring the familiar crunch and sweetness of the grapes. Sitting in the sun had left you feeling giddy and warm, excited for summer when you would be able to go out whenever you could and feel the sun on your skin.

It was the same warmth you felt whenever the Darkling touched you, even when you saw him in your dreams, there had always been a lingering sense of familiarness-- and affection. You saw the look in his eyes just seconds before you passed out, the shock as you said his name, the concern visible in his eyebrows. Him whispering, stay with me, please. It was all foreign to you. In fact, his behaviour was strange to you.

You’ve always heard of the Darkling being cold, menacing, someone you had to fear. There were stories of him ruthlessly slaughtering the Drüskelle, using the Cut to separate multiple heads from bodies in a matter of seconds. Yet he welcomed you into his home without a second thought. He fed you, gave you clothing and a place to sleep, even gave you a tour of the Little Palace himself. You were sure he had never given someone the treatment that he had given you, so what made you so different? What made you so special to him?

You didn’t miss the look he gave you when you first entered the war room, recognition and longing bright in his eyes. He tried to hide the emotion, but you were able to catch it before he returned to his dark and empty gaze. It would explain the memories, but only fueled your confusion and curiosity more. Had you shared a past life with him? If so, why were you back? How were you back? Getting lost in your thoughts, you didn’t hear the person knocking until they opened the door and announced themselves.

The familiar red hue of his kefta brought you comfort. You were too trusting lately, you’d only met Fedyor a week ago. Just the sight of his kefta had calmed something down in you. This palace was changing you, bringing out something from within you that never existed. Being this trusting on the fields would get you killed.

“Good morning, Fedyor. What brings you here?” You greeted him. This time you already had your boots laced up, the tray in your hands ready to be disposed of on the table by the door. “Going to escort me to combat training?”

“Actually, the General forbade you from stepping foot on training grounds again.” You let out a loud gasp as you whipped towards him. Thinking there was something wrong, Fedyor stepped forward, reaching his arms out to steady you just in case anything happened. In your anger, you slapped his hands away.

“Oh just you wait until he gets back,” You seethed, “Who does he think he is? Taking away my combat training privileges?”

“He’s the General, he can do that.” Fedyor responded, a small smile on his face.

“So what am I supposed to do then?”

“Well, you could still go to the library.” No, you didn’t want to risk running into the Apparat again. “Watch the Grisha train.” He offered a meek smile. “Walk the grounds.” Perhaps you could go on a horse ride later, but right now there was one thing on your mind.

“Is Alina training right now?” The heartrender gave you a nod, “I guess we’ll be going to her room then. She has something I want to borrow.” With the flick of your hand, the two of you were on your way.

“I’m going to ask you a question, and if you don’t want to answer then that’s okay.” Fedyor squints his eyes at you, before motioning to continue. “Has the Darkling ever taken up any lovers?” The question makes Fedyor stop in his tracks, a baffled look on his features.

“Well..I..” He struggled with his words, not knowing if he wanted to tell you. What would the General do to him if he told you? It was common knowledge that General Kirigan had been alive for a couple centuries now, he thought everyone knew of his endeavours. “The General has been around for many years, so naturally he has...had sex before.” The mention of it made Fedyor blush. “But he’s never settled down with someone. The closest I ever saw was with Alina.” This didn’t surprise you, Alina herself had told you about what had almost happened between the two.

“In the tent, when he tested her to see if she was Grisha, I saw something in his eyes. It was admiration, but there was also a defeated look in his eyes. As if he had given up on something because he found Alina. Reasonably, it could’ve been relief, since we had finally found the sun summoner.” Fedyor pauses, thinking wisely about the next words he spoke. “Alina and the General were growing close. Everyone saw the look they gave each other the night of the fete. But any public traces of their affection for each other had disappeared that night. The two are only seen interacting when he visits her for a gradual check-in.”

“And he’s never spoken of any other lovers?”

“Not consciously, no. On the very rare chance where we ride in the same carriage, sometimes when he falls asleep he’ll whisper about a woman. Moya dorogaya, he’d call her. That’s all I know.”

Moya dorogaya, my darling. It was the same name the Darkling had called you in your dream.

“May I ask you a question?” He inquired, you nodded your head, allowing him to proceed. “Where did you learn to fight like that?”

A smile so bright that could light up the room came to your face, “My friends down near the south Ravka border. A pair of siblings that taught me to fight before they defected from the First Army.” You confessed. “One of them also introduced me to my love of epic poetry.”

When Alina’s door came to view, you didn’t bother knocking as she had already left. After fetching what you needed, you quickly exited her room.

“I haven’t seen them since they left.” You rubbed the birthmark at your throat. Besides Mal and Alina, the siblings were also the closest thing you had to family. They considered you as their sister, even begging that you left with them. But you told them your place was here in Ravka, with Mal and Alina.

“I’m sure you’ll see them soon. Once Alina and the General get rid of the fold, we will have access to our docks again.” He said, trying to comfort you.

“I hope so.” The rest of the walk was filled with comfortable silence as you fiddled with the edges of the red book. As you neared your door, Fedyor stopped, telling you he would be just outside if you needed anything. Without wasting another second, you ran to the chair in front of the window.

The Istorii Sankt’ya glistened in the sunlight. Something about it had been calling out to you, urging you to read it and find out more. You flipped through all of the pages of the saints until you found the one that had been calling out to you.

Sankt Ilya in chains. Ilya Morozova. Morozova’s herd.

“One day. When the war is over and the shadow fold is gone, you will bear my name. You will become Mrs. Morozova. I swear it.”

The voice of the Darkling rang clear in your head. The memory made your heart come to a stop as you struggled to find a possible explanation for his words. The only conclusion you could inevitably come to was that you were the sole lover that Fedyor had been talking about.

As the sun began to set, you looked at the drawing once more. The stag, sea whip, and firebird all depicted. You called out for Fedyor, asking him to come into your room.

“Can you bring me dinner for two?” You politely asked.

“Sure, were you planning on eating it yourself or shall I fetch someone while I’m at it?”

“No. You and I are going to have a nice, long talk while we eat dinner.” His face paled as the words left your mouth.

“Oh...okay.” Was all he said before he scurried off to get the food. You tucked the Istorii Sankt’ya under a pile of paper in your desk to hide it. While you waited for Fedyor to return, you lit up some candles and lanterns now that the sun was going down. It was no fun eating in the dark.

Well, sometimes it was. You thought back to the orphanage. Night where you, Alina and Mal would sneak out of bed to have a piece of bread. The bread was never enough, but the excitement had always spurred the three of you on enough to make it a nightly routine until Ana Kuya eventually caught on.

When Fedyor returned, he rolled the cart over to where you had been seated. He placed a golden tray in front of you and another for himself right across from you. He also brought a big pitcher of Kvas for you to share.

Lifting the cover from your plate, you found yourself staring at some sort of meat pie with a side of root vegetable soup. Fedyor had the same meal but had pickled herrings instead of soup.

“Ugh, I don’t know how you eat that stuff.” You said with disgust. “I’m glad you guys don’t force me to eat that.” Although it was common peasant food, it never appealed to you. It was something you’d always hated.

“The kitchen staff have a strict list of foods you like and dislike.” That made your head snap up to meet his, who made the list? You had a scheming suspicion that it wasn’t Alina, leaving you with one suspect.

“Tell me, Fedyor, do you know what the General plans on using Morozova’s Stag for?” You inquired, feigning curiosity. You saw his hesitation, clearly uncertain if he could trust you. “I was, after all, one of the last trackers to spot it.” You reminded

“The stag is rumored to be an amplifier created by Morozova himself. Whoever wears it would hold the greatest power known to mankind. One that could rival the General’s.” He said, taking a bite of his meal before continuing, “He plans on giving it to Alina in order to get rid of the shadow fold. She’s strong, but not strong enough to get rid of it on her own.”

“What about you, do you believe they will be able to banish the fold together?” There had been a swirl of doubt pooling in you. The shadow fold was the one thing that had kept Grisha safe from the rest of the world. With the permafrost in the North and the mountains in the South, Ravka had practically been perfectly disconnected. Yet the Drüskelle and Shu still managed to slaughter Ravkans and Grisha alike.

“Yes, I do. It’s something very important to the General. That the sun summoner reversed what his ancestor, the Black Heretic, had created.” He explained.

“Right, we’ll then what happens after? It’s been so long since West Ravka has been able to connect to East Ravka. Who’s to say that they don’t want to create a monarchy of their own?” Fedyor paused at your words, he hadn’t thought much about what the West Ravkans wanted. He only knew how much his people longed to be free of the shadow fold.

“One step at a time.” He ensured, not sure if he believed the words he just said. He didn’t know what would happen if West Ravka decided to break off and become their own sovereign state. Whatever trade and weapons they had obtained came through the trading ports of the docks in West Ravka. Without it they’d have nothing. They would be nothing.

You finished the rest of your meal, occasionally talking about your time being stationed in the South while he talked about his Grisha adventures. When it came to an end, you helped him clean up and wished him a good night as he rolled the cart away. The pitcher of Kvas laid untouched, your fingers twitched at the thought of having a drink. You stared at it as Fedyor rolled it away, your throat begging for something to drink. Instead of giving into your urges, you chug whatever leftover water you had laying around.

As you got ready for bed, you couldn’t help the strong feeling of loneliness overcome you. You tried to push those feelings away when you jumped into bed, not wanting to have a miserable dream.

-

WHEN you wake, you find yourself in the deadly permafrost of the Fjerda-Ravka border in nothing more than your lace nightgown. The snow under your feet melted as you walked around, searching for another sign of human life. You didn’t feel the familiar nip of the cold at your fingertips or toes. It was that same warmth you felt with the Darkling.

You caught sight of your own breath as you whipped your head around, the snow catching in your hair. As you stumbled into a tree, you felt the recognizable carving, stating that you were now in Fjerdan territory. Your feet had walked on their own accord, not knowing where you were going until you stumbled into a clearing. The same clearing where Dubrov and Mikhael had died, slaughtered brutally by the Fjerdans. The clearing where you had killed two of their own without a second thought.

The clearing where you had finally found the stag.

The very same stag that had now stood in front of you.

You inched closer to it with careful and calculated steps. It didn’t back away as you approached. It showed no signs of aggression as you laid one of your hands upon its antlers, your other going to stoke its fur.

It was giving you that same look it gave you when you first encountered it with Mal.

Mercy. Respect. Most of all, understanding.

-

IT had been two days since you dreamt of the stag. You hadn’t dreamt of it since then, in fact, you hadn’t been dreaming of much since you saw the stag in your dreams. You thought about bringing it up to Alina during breakfast, but decided against it, the conversation somehow drifting towards the General.

“I was giving him a report of my progress last night-”

“Last night?” You interrupted, “As in a couple of hours ago?” She nods, confused by your behavior. “When did he get back?”

“The night you woke up.” She replied, as if you had been informed already. No one told you he had returned, you hadn’t even seen him once. Fedyor didn’t even tell you of his return during dinner. With a huff, you got out your chair, moving towards the door before asking Alina one last question.

“When did you mention me to the General?” She gives you another confused look, not knowing what you were talking about. That was the only answer you needed as you made your way to the war room.

He knew you. Even before he discovered Alina and took her to the Little Palace, he knew you first. Your thoughts ran around rampant and unprovoked, trying to come up with a viable explanation as you stomped towards his hall. Before you could even reach the doors of the war room, you were stopped by his oprichniki.

“The General wishes to be alone right now.” She said, hold up a hand to stop you.

“Tell him that I want to speak with him.” You replied, she looked you up and down. You wore no kefta or guards uniform. You were merely just a First Army soldier in her eyes.

“I doubt he would want to talk to someone like you.” Great, you were dealing with a Grisha Oprichniki with a horrible superiority complex. With a scoff, you turned away and walked to your room. Holding back every urge in your body to punch her.

-

WHEN night came, you found yourself struggling to get some sleep. After your encounter with that rude oprichniki, you tried your best to at least get a glimpse of the Darkling. You tried walking in the gardens in hopes to see him, no luck. You walked past the singular window of the war room, only to find the view obscured by the curtains. You paced the halls as subtly as you could, waiting for him to exit the war room. But he didn’t leave. Not once, so you just gave up and decided to try again the next day.

The black silk of your slip on did little to soothe the irritation you felt. In fact, it seemed to irritate you more as it slipped around even at your smallest movements. With a sigh, you got up from the bed and walked towards the dresser with the intention of changing into something that would provide better comfort.

You ran your hands through all the different laces and fabrics of the nightgowns until it landed on the gold kefta. Well, it wouldn’t hurt to try. You took it off it’s hanger, before walking towards the mirror. You examined it closely. The fabric itself had shimmers of gold, the black thread similar to any other kefta. As you surveyed the back of it, you noticed the handiwork of a fabrikator. Someone had tried to mend the rips of the kefta, but they were still visible up close.

The kefta had fit like a glove when you put it on. It gave you a sense of belonging. That maybe as an orphan you had finally found a home. You ogled at yourself in the mirror, the golden fabric had practically made you glow. You placed your hands into the pockets, surprised to feel something in one of them.

Grasping the object, you pulled it out. It was a letter. Covered in blood, dirtied and ripped at the corners, but still a letter nonetheless. You contemplated reading it, making the motion to put it back into the pocket before a thought crossed your mind. It wasn’t like anyone was going to find out.

You opened the letter and began to read it:

Dear Aleksander,

My darling, I don’t know why the universe has continued to bring us together. But I am thankful that they’ve given us a chance to be together once more. I have loved you for all of my lifetimes, and nothing could change that.

At least, that’s what I thought. But you’re no longer the Aleksander I once knew. Something dark has taken over you, your lust for power consuming you. I don’t know who you are anymore.

That’s why I’m doing what’s necessary, you’ve been in power for too long. It’s time for you to stop. It’s time for Ravka to be whole once more.

I’m sorry. I hope with whatever love you have left in your heart for me, that you could forgive me.

Eternally yours,

Y/N

You froze as you saw your name signed at the bottom of the letter. Lifetimes? As in more than one? This could wait no longer. Shoving the letter into your pocket, you threw open your door. The halls were empty, his oprichniki were either on a break or a shift change. Either way, you didn’t care.

You barged into the war room, expecting him to be hunched over a pile of maps, but he wasn’t. The next place you looked was his sleeping quarters that had connected to the war room. This bed was empty too, the sheets still cold. You knew of one last place he could be, and didn’t care about the risks.

You walked towards his door, each step filled with the burning curiosity you felt. Placing your hand on the doorknob, you didn’t expect it to turn. You would’ve assumed he kept the door to this bedroom always locked. But then again you were the only person who would dare enter his room without permission. After entering his room, you shut the door. Not wanting to raise suspicion to anyone who might’ve walked the halls perchance.

You paid no mind to the layout and decorations of his room as you fervently searched for him, only to come up empty handed again. Where could he possibly be? Perhaps he went for a midnight stroll. Or possibly he left the Little Palace again. But before deciding on going back to your room, you were adamant on searching the entire ground for him.

As you made your way back towards the door, your eyes briefly flashed to the portrait above it. You were frozen in your tracks as you did a double take. There in the painting was you, depicted in the gold kefta you had put on mere minutes ago. Behind you was the General, who had one hand clasped around your waist, the other resting on your shoulder. The two of you smiling brightly, it had practically been one of the only other times you’d seen him smile.

The letter in your pocket felt like it weighed a ton, your mouth going dry. In your panicked state of mind, you didn’t notice the shadows jumping up and down the walls.

“My darling.” You never heard him creeping up on you until he started talking into your ear, his whisper making you involuntarily shiver. You could practically feel the heat radiating off of him.

Turning around, you didn’t expect to find his hair dripping wet, with nothing but a towel wrapped around his hips. A blush formed on your cheeks as you tried to look at anything but him.

“Don’t call me that.” You spat out, he reached one of his hands out to touch the kefta you had put on. His touch lingered from the black stitching to the collar of the Grisha jacket, his fingers ghosting over your neck. “I’m going to ask you one more time, have we met before?”

The General saw no use in keeping the secret from you any longer; you had worn the kefta he’d made for you centuries ago, most likely read the letter in its pocket, and now you had just seen the portrait he’d hung up of the two of you. It was evidently clear that you knew something was going on.

“What do you remember?” He deflected, not answering your question.

Flashes came to your mind, ones you had dreamt, others were new.

“I remember...my death. The night those soldiers shoved a knife in me.” You confessed. You also saw other things. Horseback riding in the woods. Long nights in bed spent talking about the future. Him training you, teaching you how to wield a sword. The birthmark at your ribcage, the one on your neck, and the long ones on your back. They had all been scars. Marking all the deaths from your previous lives.

Three scars, three separate lifetimes with him. You reached up to touch the scar on your neck, “They..I-”

“This one, the Fjerdans gave you this one. We were hunting for the stag when we had gotten ambushed. They killed you for the sole purpose to see me in pain. I begged them to take me too, but they found too much joy in my grief. The Drüskelle held me on the ground, my hands spread apart, as I watched you bleed out.” You can see the tears form in his eyes as he recalls the events of that night. He walks around you, tracing the rips of the kefta. The rips had consequently been placed exactly where the scars on your back were. You could tell by the familiar pattern he traced, a once soothing action that now caused you great anguish. “The Fjerdans also gave you these ones. They tortured you for days on end. When I finally found you, it was too late. There was no healer that had the power to help you. All I could do was hold you as a heartrender calmed you, minimizing your pain.”

“I can’t remember that, why can’t I remember that?” You panicked, to which the Darkling turned you to face him, his hands cupping your cheeks as his thumbs rubbed your face in a reassuring manner.

“It’s not often that you fully remember what happens to you. It’s your brain's way of protecting you so you don’t get overwhelmed.” Well you certainly felt overwhelmed now. It was all too much to take in at once.

“The shadow fold..” You hesitated, removing yourself from his grasp. “Was that because of me?”

“Yes,” he confessed, “I created it after you first died. A way to protect all Grisha. I didn’t mean for it to get so out of hand. But it was one less threat we had to worry about.”

“I don’t understand. Why me? Why is it always me? Why do I always come back to you?”

“There’s a reason why the universe has continued to bring us back together, my darling. My other half. My life.” He walks up to you, grasping your face in his hands. His touch was different this time, it was cold yet welcoming. It felt familiar. The shadows engulfed the room as you felt a power rush over you. His eyes darted towards your lips, hesitating before leaning in. You close your eyes as you feel that familiar warmth consume you. His kiss is soft, gentle, yet you could tell he was holding back from ravaging you.

He pulls away, resting his forehead on yours. You kept your eyes closed, lost in the memories.

“Open your eyes.” He whispered. When you had closed them, the whole room had been taken by his shadows, leaving the two of you in darkness. But as he stood in front of you, his hands on your cheeks, the whole room had been illuminated. “My sun summoner, I have loved you all of my life. For all of your lifetimes.”

“Maybe one too many.” What else was there to say? You always knew, somewhere deep down inside of you, that there was something special different about you. You didn’t know it until now, until you were reunited with your other half. “But I thought Grisha couldn’t get sick.”

The smile falls from his face, “I believe..that this could possibly be our last lifetime together.” He disclosed. “Neither heartrender nor healer could explain what was happening to you. I think it might be the consequence of avoiding eternal death for so long.” He joked, his eyes meeting yours.

“I thought your last life had been our final one together. I waited hundreds of years for your return. When I had caught wind of a sun summoner being found, I thought it was you. When it wasn’t I felt as if my heart had shattered all over again. That you would never return to me again.” The Darkling squinted as the light around you grew brighter. His touch was making you unstable.

“But Alina-”

“Can’t know. No one can. I can’t risk your life again. Not anymore.” He replied, “Especially when this could be our last time together.”

You struggled to find a name to call him, the General felt too formal, and to you it seemed too early to call him by his given name.

“Aleksander, my darling. Call me by my name.” He said, withdrawing his hand from you and letting the shadows shrink back to the ground.

All your life, you had subconsciously fought the Grisha within you. You had always been Grisha. Using the powers you had been born with had given you back your strength, albeit not all of it. You enjoyed- reveled the rush it gave you.

“Aleksander,” His name left your lips in a hushed whisper, “..what if I want the stag for myself?”

-

Mizpah tags: @all-art-is-quite-useless @devilxangel @musicconversedance @parabatai-winchester @runawayolives​ @tartiflvtte @rbg1933 @thatguppienamedbae @batgal96​ @thebarisinhell99 @5hundreddaysofsummer​ @kaqua​ @queenseneschal @benbarnes-supremacy @princessofpersia96 @takethee @dontjinx-it @freakytillthemoon @amortentiaaaa @marvel-ousnesss @coolninjavoid @areomalfoy @pansysgirlfriend @universalirwin @leavejuliaalone @xx-winwin-wednesday-xx​ @honeyofthegods @lunamyangel @d-list-goddess​ @comphersjost @telepathdestiel @the-celestial-kitsune @thestoryofmylife9 @s-corpionem @pancakeisreading @sanna2020​ @secretsandtinyshadows @savannah-elliott @maliasblue @tea-effect @disneyandharrypotter @futuristicpinklemur @tanyaherondale @the-puff-is-strong-with-this-one @hxgreeves @yourboiialucard@thereeallink @ladyblablabla @wolfieellsworld @p3nny4urth0ught5​ @louweasleymalfoy @the-natureofme @itsloveroflife @oddlittleminx @within-thehollowcrown @itsfangirlmendes @heyyimlaynna @jgtfvhsg @gloriousmoneyrascalbiscuit @auggie2000 @itsnotquimey @jtownraindancer @sonnensplitter @sarcastic-and-cool @poulterfilms @spookybooisa @stickyknightflowerbailiff @hollandsweetie @yungkvte @evyiione @2023-padfoot @kawaiimarshmallow @nikki-sixx-is-daddy @sanktawylan @blackbirddaredevil23​ @athenamikaelson​ @mellifluous-cosmos​ @mylittlecrazyworldofinterest​ @iiclarixa​ @lcandothisallday​ @agent-jbarnes​

Mizpah taglist is CLOSED for now!

S.a.B. forever tags: @deceivedeer​

[writethelifeyouwant]

Aversion Therapy

Summary: Y/N has been institutionalised for sex addiction at an experimental facility, run by Dr. Sam Winchester.

Pairing: Doctor!Sam x Reader Rating: 18+ Warnings: Sex addiction, addiction therapies, abuse of therapist/patient relationship, noncon roleplay Tags: hair pulling, crotchless panties, degradation (like, a lot), blow job, spitting, pussy spanking, sex on a desk, body writing, p in v, pulling out Word Count: 4.5 k Created for: @samwinchesterbingo - Doctor!Sam | @spnkinkbingo - Crotchless Panties | @anyfandomgoesbingo - Hair Pulling | @j3bingo - Diary

A/N: So I this may or may not be one of the dirtiest things I've ever written. It's definitely up there in the list 😅I hope you enjoy, fellow sinners!

October 24th

Last night was awesome. He took me out to dinner and everything, real gentleman, even though we both knew that’s not what the night was about. It was sunset when we got up to the lookout, all romantic. I felt silly that he was making such a big deal about it. Losing your virginity shouldn’t be so much pressure. Now it’s over I don’t feel any different except that I want more. We went twice last night but that still wasn’t enough. I touched myself this morning and it was almost like I could still feel him inside of me. I think tonight I’m gonna let him do it without the condom, so he will still be inside me tomorrow morning.

“What the hell are you doing?” you shout, outraged. It wasn’t enough that your parents had locked you in this place, humiliating you, betraying you, handing you over to Doctor Judgy, but they’d handed over your diaries too. Fucking great. Dr. Winchester ignores you and keeps reading, skipping ahead a few weeks.

November 15th

Fuck I love sex. Even with guys that aren’t great at it it’s still worth it just to have a cock inside me. I wish I could stay the night somewhere without my parents freaking out. I want to fall asleep with a cock inside me the whole time, wake up to it fucking me, keeping me open. College is gonna be the best. Then I can finally do what I want, fuck who I want. Can finally order a freaking vibrator without mom asking what’s in the package. Ugh, I can’t wait.

Sam’s voice sounds unnatural reading out your words. He’s not putting the right emotion or inflection in them. It’s like he’s taunting you with them. There’s a trace of humour underlying everything he says.

“Why are you doing this?” you shout again, and Sam looks up at you from your diary, a smug smile on his lips.

“Because you’re sick, Y/N,” he states it like an obvious fact, shutting the diary with a loud clunk and waving it back and forth. “These are the words of an addict.”

“I’m not an addict,” you scoff, rolling your eyes. Sam raises his eyebrows at you and flicks open your diary again, thumbing through to a page he has marked with a turned down corner.

February 3rd

That’s it, I’m addicted to cock. I need it more than coffee or air or food. I just want to be on my knees all day and let men use me. I want them in my mouth, in my pussy, even in my ass, I don’t care. I just want them. One day I’ll figure out how to make that happen.

Sam gives you an accusatory look as he closes the diary again, and you do have the good sense to look a little sheepish. Having your thirsty words read back to you is embarrassing. Especially considering the man reading them out is extremely attractive. If you’d met him when you were out you would have been on him in a heartbeat.

You can’t help it, your eyes drop to his crotch, which is just below your eye level where he’s leaning against the front edge of his desk. Dr. Winchester notices your gaze and smirks down at you knowingly. The expression makes him even hotter – domineering and sexy.

“You really are a little slut. Get carted off to rehab and the first thing you do is eye up your therapist,” he clicks his tongue disappointedly, and you blush for a moment before you decide that you don’t want to take this shit from him.

“So what,” you shrug, leaning back in your chair and crossing your arms. Dr. Winchester raises a brow again, surprised by your boldness.

“You don’t think it’s inappropriate to think about your therapist in a sexual manner?” He pushes himself off his desk and settles his hands in his pockets, considering you carefully.

“I like cock, so what?” you say again defiantly. The doctor keeps his expression neutral, walking around his desk and sitting down, grabbing a notepad and scribbling down a few things. You watch him suspiciously, wanting to know what he was writing down. “I’m not crazy, I just really like sex.” Dr. Winchester nods and keeps writing, not looking up at you.

“Come on, are you saying you don’t like sex?” you try to rile him up, and you see a small laugh bleed through his careful exterior, but not the kind of reaction you were hoping for. “What, your manhood not measure up or something?” That gets the doctor’s attention. He shoots you a glare over his desk and puts aside his pen, folding his hands in front of him and staring you down. His eyes drag across you from top to bottom, lingering on your lips, your neck, your cleavage, your legs. You like him looking at you like this, it sends a thrill through your chest, settling in the pit of your stomach.

“I can see that your attitude is going to make traditional therapies somewhat difficult.” You roll your eyes, but let him keep talking. “Have you heard of aversion therapy?” You shake your head shortly. “Aversion therapy is a psychological treatment in which the patient,” Dr. Winchester gestures to you, “is exposed to a stimulus while simultaneously being subjected to some form of discomfort, in an attempt to discourage said behaviour.”

“Um, English, please?” you stare at the doctor blankly, not putting together how this is going to apply to you.

“Well,” Dr. Winchester leans back in his chair, and swings his legs up onto his desk and brings his hands to fold in his lap. It makes him look surprisingly casual - not at all the image you had of doctors and therapists in your mind. “In this case, the stimulus is an unwanted behaviour, your over zealous sexual cravings and actions. We need to introduce an element of discomfort or unpleasantness into your experience of that behaviour, to discourage future indulgences,” he explains.

“What are you gonna do, Doctor?” you sneer at his title. “Put me in an electroshock chair and make me watch porn? Newsflash - that sounds amazing,” you scoff. Honestly, if that’s going to be your therapy, you’ll drop the attitude and sign the fuck up right now.

Dr. Winchester shakes his head, a small smirk on his lips. He stands, removing his jacket and tossing it on the back of the chair, then proceeds to unbutton the cuffs of his sleeves and roll them back, one at a time. You watch him suspiciously. The moment his jacket came off your head went straight to one conclusion, but that couldn’t be right. You find your eyes lingering on his forearms, the veins in them pulsing visibly just below the surface of his skin. You want to lick them.

“No you’re right, you’d enjoy that far too much.” The doctor’s voice brings you back to yourself and you look up, watching him slowly approaching your chair. “We won’t be associating a physical discomfort with the addiction, what we want is to alter your mental associations towards the behaviour. We’ll use a series of mantras, and repetition and after a period of good, focused work, we can start to transition you back to a home environment.” His hand comes up to grip the back of your wooden chair, right beside your ear, and you can feel the heat radiating from his body against your skin despite the several inches still separating you.

Between your legs, you can feel how much Dr. Winchester’s proximity is beginning to affect you. For some reason the way he’s speaking to you, so formal and condescending, is really turning you on. You bet if he knew, he’d just say it was another sign of your “addiction”. You can feel your panties starting to get a little slippery when you shift in your seat to look up at him, and you don’t manage to stifle your small intake of breath when the open crotch of the underwear accidentally catches on one of your pussy lips, sending a delicious tug of pain into your core.

Dr. Winchester smirks down at you, entirely unsubtle, probably assuming that gasp was your reaction to him being so near.

Finally, after far too long staring at him, you manage to take a breath and ask- “what exactly is my therapy going to be, then?” Your voice comes out much higher than you’d anticipated, and you feel your cheeks heat up in embarrassment.

Dr. Winchester’s hand drags along the top of the chair and lands on the back of your neck. You shiver when his skin touches yours, despite its warmth. His fingers wind themselves into your hair a second later and yank hard, pulling your head over the back of the chair so you’re forced to look straight up at him.

“Ow! What the hell?!” You reach behind you to try to break his grip but he just pulls again. The pain sends a new tendril of desire twisting down your spine to between your legs, and you feel your panties getting even wetter. You whimper, your arousal clearly evident to the doctor, who laughs.

“Yeah, I knew you’d be too into pain for that kind of thing to work,” he chuckles darkly. He bends down, face so close to yours you can feel his breath ghost against your cheek. “So here’s what we’re going to do instead. I’m gonna fuck you, but you’re going to make sure you don’t enjoy it. You’re going to cry and yell and beg me to stop.” He practically growls, nose brushing against yours, lips hovering just out of reach.

Your pussy clenches at his words, aroused beyond belief at the disdain he’s treating you with. You struggle against his grip deliberately, relishing in the renewed sting as his hand pulls your hair even tighter to keep you still.

“You really don’t get it, do you Dr. Winchester,” you try to laugh but your throat is taut and your air isn’t quite flowing easily enough to let you. “I like cock. I wanted you to fuck me the second I saw you. There’s nothing you could say or do that would make me want you to stop.”

“I think we can drop the formalities now,” he releases you, standing up and reaching for his belt. “It’s Sam, not ‘Doctor Winchester’.”

Your eyes drop to his hands immediately, watching his fingers deftly push his button through its hole and pull down his zip. He’s already hard, you can tell by the tent in his boxers, but you’re astonished to see when he pulls himself out that he’s actually only semi hard – his cock is just huge. You feel your mouth and your pussy water in equal measure.

“Fuck,” you whisper as he starts to stroke himself, eyes tracing up and down your body hungrily as he does so.

“You want this cock, Y/N?” he asks pointedly, and you nod mutely. “Use your words then.”

“Yes,” you breathe instantly, dropping to your knees on the hard, grey carpet in front of him.

“Then you don’t get it,” Sam smirked, contradictorily walking himself closer to you as he speaks, hand still pumping his cock.

“Please?” you beg, hoping that’s the game he’s trying to play. Maybe he thinks he can humiliate you enough that you won’t want to repeat the experience – he’s going to be wrong.

“Nope.” Sam pops the ‘p’ on the word teasingly. “Your mantra for today is ‘no’.”

“What?” you look up to him, confused.

“Anytime I ask you if this is what you want – if you want my cock in your mouth, in your pussy, anywhere I want to put it – anytime I ask you if you want it, you have to say ‘no’,” he smiles down at you like some kind of evil genius, and you’re getting annoyed now that you find this so fucking hot.

“You want me to pretend you’re raping me? Sounds like you need therapy.” Sam laughs, not at all offended by your jab.

“We’re trying to condition a new response, Y/N,” he explains lightly, still jacking himself off maddeningly close to your lips. It takes every ounce of self control you have not to lean forward and suck him down on the spot. “If you want my cock inside you, then you have to tell me you don’t. And hopefully, with time, you’ll start to believe what you’re saying out loud. You’ll believe that you don’t need this, don’t want this.” He taps his cock against your lips and your tongue chases him immediately, reaching for a taste of the liquid you felt pooling on his tip.

“Uh, uh, uh,” he pulls himself away, tutting. “What do you say, Y/N?”

You swallow your pride and give him what he’s asking, though begrudgingly.

“No, please, don’t.” Your voice is monotone, lifeless – like how you used to read out loud in English class when the teacher called on you.

“C’mon, you know that’s not good enough. How are you going to believe yourself if I don’t believe you?” Sam walks closer again and sets his cock against your mouth lightly. “You wanna suck my cock, baby?”

“No,” you manage to choke out, and your hesitance to say the word must sound like hesitance to give him a blow job because Sam buys it, and the next moment he’s pushing the shiny, pink head past your lips, against your tongue; not stopping until he hits the top of your throat. He pulls back again, taking himself completely out of your mouth.

“You want it?” he asks again, grinning down at you.

“No,” you whimper, while inside every fibre of your body is screaming – yes!

“Good girl,” he groans as he pushes himself back inside, and you moan along with him. This time he doesn’t stop himself, fucking all the way into your throat until your nose is pressed against the skin of his stomach. “Fuck, you really are a cockslut,” Sam grunts above you, pulling back a little and starting to fuck your mouth in earnest. “You haven’t gagged once. Not many girls manage that with me.”

You believe him. Your jaw is already aching from the stretch of your lips around his girth but you savour the hurt. You love this; being on your knees for some guy you barely know with his cock shoved as far in as he can fit it. This is what you were made for, you know it, no matter how hard Sam’s going to try to talk you out of it.

He fucks your throat for a few more minutes, lulling you into a false sense of security. You’ve relaxed into it now, and you aren’t thinking about the therapy or the role play or any of it, you’re only thinking about his cock against your tongue, heavy and velvety and perfect. You cry out when he pulls away, taking in a shocked breath at the sudden emptiness.

“You want it back baby girl?” Sam asks breathlessly, and you allow yourself a moment to feel smug at how clearly affected he is by your ministrations.

“Please,” you beg, crawling towards him, forgetting your lines. Sam pulls away, disappointment evident on his face.

“Wrong answer, Y/N.”

“No!” you shout hoarsely, trying to correct yourself. “I mean no, please, no.”

“No,” Sam sucks in a breath, reaching to pull up his trousers like he’s going to put himself away. “No, I don’t think I believe you.”

“No, Sam, please!” you beg, reaching out for him. “I can do this,” you whisper, and Sam lets you take his cock in your hand, wrapping his fingers over yours and guiding your strokes. “Ask me again?”

“Do you want my cock, Y/N?” Sam raises an eyebrow.

“No,” you say firmly. “No, don’t make me do this.”

“Good girl,” he says again, his hand tightening over yours and using you to jerk himself off. “Do you want my cock, Y/N?”

“No,” you whine, trying to play into it even though your fingers start trying to jack him off faster of their own accord, your hands slipping together over the saliva you’d left behind.

“Do you want my cock in your pussy?” Sam growls, reaching his free hand out to snag your hair and pulling hard, causing you to shout out in delicious pain.

“No!” you squeal, trying to pull out of his hold, hoping you can act your way through this convincingly enough to get what you really want.

“No, whore?” Sam spits on you harshly, the wet striking you on the cheek and dripping down your chin.

“No,” you scream again as he pulls you off of the ground by your hair, throwing you forwards over his desk. Books and pads of paper go crashing to the ground. Pens scatter around you when your elbow hits the mug that was holding dozens of them.

“No?” you hear Sam scoff as he flips up the hem of your patient-issued uniform skirt, spotting the pair of crotchless panties you’re wearing beneath. “You’re telling me a slut like you, who gets put in an insititution for sex addiction, and decides to pack crotchless fucking panties, doesn’t want my cock stuffing her cunt full?”

“No, I don’t want it,” you moan, his words positively setting you on fire. Fuck, you want everything he’s saying and more.

“I don’t fucking believe you,” Sam spits between your legs, adding to the slick that must be visibly gathered there by now.

“No!” you cry out when he delivers a stinging blow to your pussy, palm landing right over the open slit of your panties. “No,” you sob out again as he continues to spank you, each hit making a sickly wet echo and sending a jolt of heat through your clit every time his fingers happen to catch it. “No, no, no,” you’re begging, even as you spread your legs wider and push your hips back into his hand, trying to angle yourself so he hits your small bundle of nerves more frequently.

“You’re fucking loving this aren’t you,” Sam is seething behind you. “I can feel how wet you are, you fucking whore. You want my cock now, huh? Want me to put all this slick to good use?” He dips his fingers into the crotch of your panties and comes away with his fingers drenched in your juices, which you see a moment later when he shoves them in your face, yanking you back by your hair again.

“See this slut? See how I can tell you’re lying to me? What’s all this for if it’s not to get you ready for my cock?”

“N–” you try to protest, needing him to believe you if you want to actually feel his cock inside you, but your words are cut off as he shoves his fingers into your mouth, making you lick yourself off his hand.

“That’s right, taste what a fucking embarrassment you are.” Sam lets go of your hair and from the corner of your eye you see his fingers reaching for one of the pens that you knocked onto the desk earlier. Pulling his fingers out of your mouth, he uncaps the pen and crouches down behind you, putting your pussy at eye level for him.

“I think we should let the world know just how much of a slut you really are.” You wonder what he means, feeling him draw a single line down your right buttock, then switching to your left and writing some words. “Now anyone who fucks you is gonna see my instructions, and know they have to leave a tally mark right here.” He slaps your ass hard where he had just drawn his own. “And every time you come back to me for a session with more tallies than you left with the last time I saw you, that’s just one more time you’re gonna have to go through this with me. To make sure we really break you out of this habit.”

You silently wonder how many guys there are in this hospital that you might want to fuck. He spanks you again and you clench, pussy convulsing at the threat and the thought of men keeping count of the cocks you’ve taken by literally writing it on your body. You feel a trickle of slick start to make its way down your thigh, and you know Sam must have noticed because he laughs darkly.

“You like the sound of that, don’t you? Are you already planning how to rack up your score as soon as I let you out of this office?” he sneers vehemently.

“No,” you shake your head, even though it’s entirely true. “No, I don’t want that, I promise, I don’t.”

“But you still want my cock?” Sam questions, and you feel the tip of his dick start to drag against you, up and down the slit of your panties.

“No, I don’t want it,” you insist, trying to keep yourself from pushing back onto him.

“Good girl, Y/N,” Sam pets at your lower back and braces himself as he starts to sink in. You both moan when he enters you, but to your chagrin he stops when he only has an inch or so inside. “You want me to keep going?” he pants, and you’re pleased to hear that he’s not as composed now that he’s got the head of his cock wedged between your legs.

“No,” you shake your head quickly, silently praying for him to continue.

“Very good,” he groans, and begins to thrust into you again; tiny, sharp motions to ease himself into you bit by bit.

“No, stop,” you whine without prompting, hoping to encourage him to go faster. He does. “No, no, no,” you chant until he’s sheathed himself completely inside you, his hips pressed firmly into yours, his hands squeezing around your waist possessively.

“No?” Sam asks teasingly, pulling out a little.

“No!” you cry again, and this time you do mean ‘no’ – you don’t want him to leave you. At your cry Sam pushes back in harshly, snapping his hips back against yours and moaning, the sound bubbling up deep from his chest. “No,” you try repeating the phrase, testing your theory, and you’re rewarded by Sam withdrawing and fucking back into you piercingly.

“Please stop, please,” you whimper, not able to stop yourself from rocking back into his thrusts as Sam starts a punishing pace.

“You fucking liar, you love this you little cockslut,” Sam grunts pointedly, taunting you.

“No,” you insist, still meeting him thrust for thrust. “No I don’t want this, I don’t want you!”

“You’re always going to want cock, always gonna beg for it.”

“No!”

“You want me to stuff you full everyday don’t you? Maybe more than that. I bet you’d sit under my desk all day with my cock in your mouth if I told you to,” he laughs, his harsh pace becoming even quicker. He’s not fucking you deeply now but that means that every time he pushes in the head of his cock punches hard against the sweet spot on the front of your pussy, making you clench around him.

“No,” you shudder, feeling yourself close to the brink of your release, and you wonder what he’ll do when you cum – a clear demonstration that you’re fucking loving this, despite what you’re saying out loud.

“Say it louder, bitch,” he grunts, reaching down and spanking hard against your clit.

“No, no, stop!” you shout, desperately trying to fuck yourself on his cock, your orgasm just out of reach.

“You want to cum on my cock?” Sam slaps you again but then starts to rub tiny circles just where you need them.

“N–no,” you stutter, unable to hold back your moan.

“You don’t want to cum baby, you sure?” he teases, angling his hips so he’s fucking your sweet spot with each drive into you.

“No,” you whine, voice pitching higher as you feel yourself right there.

“No?” You can hear from Sam’s voice that he’s pouting at you, mocking you. “You don’t want to cum baby? Not gonna cum on my big, fat cock fucking you so good?” You clench around him, your toes curling, straining… “Come on you little slut, fucking cum already. Thought whores like you were supposed to be easy? Huh? Want you to cum for me, Y/N.”

“No, no, no, no, no–” you lose track of what you’re saying as you cum, screaming into your arm so you don’t accidentally say something to make Sam stop fucking you. Thankfully, he doesn’t stop. He fucks you through your orgasm and your come down, hips snapping more and more erratically as you bury your face in his desk and try to catch your breath.

Suddenly, the weight of his body is gone, and then there’s a warm jolt between your legs, and you know he’s cumming – aiming his load at the top of your panties and letting it drip down through the open crotch. You moan high in your throat at the feeling of his release soaking into your underwear, mixing with your own juices, which are already leaking out of you and dripping onto his desk.

“That was a really good session, Y/N,” Sam says, and you’re surprised to hear how composed he sounds, though a little breathless. “I think this is going to be a good strategy for you.” He walks around to the other side of his desk and starts to pick up the books and papers you’d knocked down earlier.

Slowly, you peel yourself up off his desktop, your skin sticking to the surface with sweat that’s already started to dry.

“Go clean yourself up, Y/N,” Sam instructs, not looking at you as he continues to tidy his desk. You turn to go, still in your post-orgasmic daze, but you spin back around when Sam calls your name again. “Oh, and Y/N?” you look at him curiously, and a smirk curls slowly across his lips as you watch. “You better keep the tally marks, or there’ll be consequences next session.”

“Yes, Dr. Winchester,” you agree quietly and slip out of his office into the hallway, walking back to your room behind an orderly, with Sam’s cum still dripping down your thighs. You think about the tally he’d left on your body, and you look up at the orderly, who’s now stopped at the door to your room and holding it open for you.

As you pass him, you keep your eyes trained at the ground, and glance sideways to surreptitiously inspect the man next to you. The hospital scrubs do nothing to hide his endowment. You smile brightly, bringing your eyes up the rest of his body, taking in the muscles in his arms and the name tag on his chest, before landing on his face.

“Thanks, Dean.” You walk into your room, eyes flicking back to see Dean still standing there, watching you walk towards your bed. You bend over to grab something off the bottom shelf of your nightstand, not caring what you grab, just knowing that you’re now giving Dean a full display of your ass – Sam’s writing and Sam’s cum decorating your skin.

The door behind you shuts quietly.

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[sparkbeast20]

The Pain of Love (Lucifer X MC)

The Blue Lotus petals

As a fan of Beauty and the Beast, Showing your “true self” to Lover or (Monster Love) Tropes. I figure to make a (More Demonic Forms AU/head canon) story for each brothers. heads up each brother’s Story is long as fuck. So, I'll be posting them as parts and finishing one brother before moving on to the rest of them. (tell me if you want tag)

Warning: Before and after Sex but no depiction of sex sorry I don't know how to write smut, The other six kinda being torture

“Yeah, I do hear the eerie voices in this one” you were laying in the couch in Lucifer’s study, while listening to one of his curse records.

“Just make sure you don’t listen to the end, you might get nightmares, we don’t need two insomniacs in our bed.” All the while Lucifer is doing some early paper work before breakfast. You just came along with him, because you couldn’t go back to sleep.

“We wouldn’t even have one, if a certain demon learns to sleep within 8 hours” he chuckles at your poor attempt of a sley comment.

“I’ll take full advantage of this morning, since we don’t class today, that way we have the entire afternoon together”

“Promise!”

“I Promise, now cut the record, the end is approaching”

You lifted the nailed, the you sat up and stretch your arms before standing up and walk over to Lucifer, you wrap your arms around is shoulders, lean forward and kiss the top of his head. He hums at your presents.

You move down and whisper in his ear. “You want some coffee, Lucifer” you pulled away to meet his sight, he nods with a smirk on his face, then you let go and start walking up the stairs. As you about to turn the knob, he calls to you.

“Y/n, as of today no more, blue lotus petals in my coffee for now on.”

“Okay, anything else?”

“Just make sure it’s bitter, okay love” with that you gave him a playful smile and left.

“Oh sweet, yer making coffee, mind make me one too” Mammon just steps in the kitchen, happy to smell coffee in the air.

“You can have mine, I really only made for me and Lucifer” you tell him that, while waiting for the coffee to get ready.

“So, his up all ready what’s he doing now.” Mammon asks while his digging through the cabins for something.

“Finishing some bills, this month’s plan actives for RAD, and the house budgets” you answer as you pour the two mugs with coffee.

“Should I start running now or pray that none of those bills are mine”

“Just wait in an hour to see” you smile at him, you fully know that he needs to hide now, as you pass him the mug of coffee. He took it with uncertain look on his face and drop two blue petals in his coffee.

“Hey, you forgot these” you’re at the doorway, when you turn around with coffee in hand to see Mammon holding up the blue lotus petals.

“Lucifer said no more petals in his coffee”

“What!”

“Something wrong?” after a moment Mammon shake his head, tells you it’s nothing, you shrug your shoulder and walk back to Lucifer.

“Oh… Y/n, be a doll and untie us” Asmo calls to make you to look up into the ceiling to see Mammon, Levi, Satan with cloth in his mouth, Asmo, and Belphie who also have a cloth in his mouth, Strang up by their legs.

“Let me guess, one could stop ordering online, the two of you try to sneak out late in a school night, and the last two pull something that piss of the eldest” you said nonchalantly, causing Satan to violently flail, Mammon and Levi crying.

Asmo tries to fix his head to look at you properly, bashing his eye lash to soften up to you “Oh come on, you know us this is what we are, haven’t you notice that Lucifer has been a little~”

“Strict lately” you finish what he was about to say, Asmo pouts with his lower lip stick out and look at you with sad puppy eyes begging you to untie them.

In your mind, you want to untie them but remembering what Lucifer said “don’t cave to them, understand” cause you to hesitate. When all of the sudden the door slam open, causing you to turn around to see Lucifer in his demon form, dragging a tie up Beel, the latter which is sobbing.

Hearing his twin sobbing wakes up Belphie who start to flail around like Satan.

You don’t why, but you started to turn redder, you can feel the heat rushing through your face. Maybe Seeing Lucifer dragging Beel with one arm and dominant look on his face makes you want to hold him tight and cuddle into his chest.

While you just standing there awestruck, Lucifer manage to Strang up Beel next to Belphie.

“Oi Y/n, tell Lucifer that is gone too far” Mammon calls out to you

“Y-yeah, out of any of us Beel does have to Strang like this” Levi adds to Mammon call, while Belphie mummer through the cloth to grab your attention.

“Enough, Beelzebub is only going Strang up for 2 hours. For empty the fridge 2 days straight and all of you just have to wait 6 more hours depending on who has the least offense” Lucifer tells his brothers with a booming voice, then all of them started to yell, cry, and/or mummer at him.

He was about to yell, when all of the sudden you hug him and bury you face into chest, seeing your action shock the brothers.

Without looking away from his brothers, place one arm on your back drawing you closer. You look up at his face with your eyes of filled with lust and your face with red through your cheek.

He looks down, a smile creep up on his face, he cups your face drawing it closer to his.

Then you pouch kissing him like untamed animal, wrapping your arms around his neck not letting him pull away, as his arms rub around your back, one hand on your shoulder while the other one is on your waist.

Seeing you two practically eating each, the brothers watch in horror, Mammon and Levi are screaming in agony, Satan and Belphie try to look away but couldn’t, and Asmo and Beel are mortifed.

Hearing his brothers in pain, cause Lucifer to growl aggressively in pleasure, then he sweeps you off your feet while you two are still kissing taking you somewhere private, as you two slowly walk away to savior the screams, you slowly pull-out foldable knife that Mammon gave to you from your pocket and throw it at Beel, seeing the knife Beel swing forward and catch the knife with his teeth, and hums in happiness for catching it, then Lucifer slam the door closes.

“I’m hungry” Beel sitting in the dinning room groaning in pain, with the rest of the brothers still recover from Lucifer’s punishment.

Mammon, Levi, Satan, and Asmo rub their neck, arms and legs to less the street on them, while Belphie is collapse on the table awake.

“S-so which one of us want to asks Lucifer M-money for dinner” Levi asks around to who’s brave enough to go Lucifer’s room and asks him.

“Are you mad! I would rather use my own money, then going to that monster right now” Mammon yell at Levi, for suggesting that.

“I want to pull out my eyes and burn them” Satan talk to himself, trying to forget what he had to watch helpless.

Then foot steps can be heard, causing the brothers stiff in place except for Levi who hide under the table.

Not even at the doorway you start talking to them “So Lucifer asks me to give you money for take-out, and tell all of you that we’ll be skipping dinner too”

Asmo back to his cheerful self, wanting to know what drove you into acting like him ask while waiting for you to come inside the room, both hands under his chin and elbows rest on the table with his eyes gleefully close.

“Oh, are you and my big brother done~” before he could finish his question, he turns to the doorway and open his eyes to see you.

His eyes widen as he let out shock gasp, causing the rest to look up and did the same thing.

You were barely standing wearing Lucifer’s robe and nothing else, dark hand grips around both of your wrists, your almost expose chest is covered in hickeys, bite marks and three visible claw marks. And your messy hair is covered your face.

With a goofy smile, you slowly walk over to the table and place half stack of grimms on it, then slowly walk out the room leave the brothers stunned.

After a few minutes of complete silent, Mammon remembering something, cause him to yelp to himself, knowing fully well that there are royal screwed for the coming weeks.

[river-bottom-nightmare]

"you were missed, you know.” the voice is light, balancing on the edge of airy like a coin on its rim, in a way only careful practice yielded. so jason whirls around, faster than he normally would in a neatly-pressed suit and loose dress shoes. 

there’s a woman, close cropped red hair swinging into her face and pulling at the corners of her mouth until her expression is as severe as her form. there’s a scar on her jaw and, oh, the memory tumbles into his head as if pushed. kate kane, proof that vigilantism is genetic, once tugged jason into into her side and pulled him away from a particularly leering investor at function. the bite of her nails on his skin was a thousand times sweeter than the man’s smile.

she smirks. “hi.”

“haven’t seen you in a while,” jason responds, attempting casual and instead tripping, falling into his crime lord persona, since he doesn’t know how else to interact with people when he’s jason peter todd-wayne. 

“not since you died,” kate remarks and damn, right for the gullet. “you’ve grown up.”

jason shrugs, suddenly feeling thirteen years old again, suddenly feeling all of four feet, eight inches in the face of her candidness. “time’s funny like that.”

she eyes him carefully, trying to fish for the truth in what she believes is a lie wrapped in a careful quip. jason doesn’t blame her: he’s cultivated quite a reputation for himself. but he stripped the sarcasm from his words before he spoke them, and their rawness is shrouded in the bubbling champagne and crystal chandelier around them, but it’s no less present for anyone who knows how to peel the veil back.

“you were missed,” she repeats, satisfied with his answer. “not sure anyone’s told you that since you’ve come back. your family’s a stubborn bunch. i just wanted to make sure.”

“make sure i knew i was missed?” jason clarifies, feeling a little foolish, because dick wouldn’t beg to save his life but there were a few times that his words came close to pleas, and tim had made it clear how much he’d upheld the pedestal he’d put jason on, and alfred had actually told him that to his face. 

but this was the first time he found himself truly believing those familiar words. he hadn’t known kate, not at all. and yet, she nodded, clapped him on the shoulder once, twice, then left, completely unaware of the pit of resentment she’d carved out of jason’s stomach and thrown on the ground until jason felt like he’d slip on it if he moved, if he breathed.

she didn’t look back, but jason’s eyes didn’t stop following her until she was out of sight.

*

"you were missed, you know.” jason doesn’t startle, his training is etched into every scar decorating his skin, and there are times that he grips and holds onto those scars like a lifeline. he’s far too practiced to flinch, but he’d be lying to himself if his heart didn’t skip a beat.

he forgave himself in the next second, though. cassandra cain could make men much more experienced than him recoil. she appeared soundlessly, and folded down beside him with a grace that jason hadn’t seen anywhere outside his family. the amount of space she left between them, the relaxed posture that left visible tension cording through her arms like pulling steel taffy, the tilt to her body that made jason automatically want to open his mouth and let his tumultuous thoughts come out as an oil spill: right now, cass had dick grayson’s brushtrokes all over her.

“dick put you up to this?” 

cass shook her head, then bit her lip in a considering movement. jason wondered if he’d practiced, because bruce had long since broken that dangerous habit out of his children. 

“i am still working on comfort. assurance,”  she said, rifling through the words like flash cards, picking the most accurate ones. “i thought i’d practice.”

“oh? and why exactly do you think i need comfort.”

“i overheard your argument,” she admitted, “with bruce.”

“i didn’t think anyone was there.”

“i didn’t mean to,” she said. “sorry. but i heard what you said.”

jason scoffed. “prove me wrong. one step forward, two steps back with that dense motherfucker.”

“sign of protection,” cass said. “not distrust.”

out of everyone to say that to him, cass was probably the least likely. jason had thought she, of all people, would be on his side after he found the microchip in his helmet. she, of all people, would value independence after being owned for so long.

“by the time he found you, you were dead. and he missed you more than anything. he will never let that happen again.”

“oh yeah? privacy mean nothing to him? i know he’s crazy about this stuff but come on. there’s a limit.”

“you are not relying on him because of this.” cass stood up, stretching her back, though jason was sure she really didn’t have to. “he is relying on you. let him.”

*

“you were missed, you know.” 

“what, speaking from personal experience? i ain’t you, west.” jason could feel the gentle thrum of electricity behind him, making his hair stand on edge. two steps backward, and he’d be pulled into that void, that black hole of energy, that swirling vortex of pure power condensed into something human-shaped.

except he wouldn’t. it was just wally. just dick’s best friend joining him outside on the balcony. jason didn’t know how dick and tim could stand to be around speedsters willingly, for fun.

“i mean, sort of,” wally shrugged. “but me and you had very different experiences.”

“yeah, west, i’m not sure who else has been stuck in the fucking speedforce.”

wally snorted, an if only you knew hidden in plain sight. jason decided he really didn’t want to know. “i mean there’s that,” the speedster concedes, “but also, everyone forgot i existed. that didn’t happen with you.”

“you sure about that?” 

“hey,” wally eyed him, his eyes suddenly sharp. “don’t start that shit. i was erased from the memories of everyone i loved. you did nothing but stay in the memories of your family.”

“now i know we’re talking about two different things.”

“jason,” wally sighed, and the sheer exasperation pouring off him made jason want curl his fingers, bring them up for a swing, taste the bite of pain that would prick at his knuckles, nevermind the fact that wally would dodge anyway. “don’t do that.”

he turned to face the speedster, arms crossed deliberately over his chest. “where the hell do you get off acting like dick?”

“you’re more like dick than you realize,” wally said, “and i spent half my childhood dealing with his moods. actually, i still do.”

“do you have a point?” jason snapped, starting to get irritated. he wasn’t sure why. he’d spent his entire life one one end of a scale, dick grayson on the other. he’d always tipped his end down. this was the first time someone was telling him the scale was even.

“just because your family didn’t mourn the way you wanted them to,” wally said, “doesn’t mean they didn’t mourn you.”

“fuck you.”

“they loved you. and they missed you,” wally continues, steamrolling right over jason in a way most speedsters were prone to do. “there’s no minimum requirement for loss. no ‘if you didn’t do this, then you didn’t grieve me.’ that’s not even a situation, ever.”

“so that makes everything bruce did okay?” jason sputtered

“not at all. god knows i disagree with bruce on more things than i tolerate. but this is one thing you can’t fault him on.”

it wasn’t that easy, though. jason wanted to scream it at wally’s face, it wasn’t that easy. it wasn’t about whether bruce loved him enough,,,,except maybe it was. jason wanted bruce to have loved him enough to make a difference in gotham. jason wanted bruce to have missed him enough to change things, because change meant that bruce had been so hurt by his death that he refused to let it happen to anyone else again.

bruce had made a vow after his parents died. the fifteen year old inside jason was begging bruce why he hadn’t been afforded the same devotion. jason was his son.

“just something to think about,” wally said, then stepped backward, making to go inside where dick was calling him. “you were afforded the luxury of coming back with a place left empty in your family for you. you didn’t have to make it, like i did.”

“being dead, then coming back wrong isn’t a fucking luxury,” jason snarled.

with a shrug, wally turned, a little faster than the average human, lightning sparking at his heels as he left jason alone on the balcony. “depends on your definition of wrong.”

jason get therapy. please. also happy deathday

honestly i couldn’t decide whose side of the argument i was on, jason’s or wally’s.

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