#bruce goes along with it against his will because not only is it a great cover for his identity but his kids keep tweeting that it's true

[remarcely]

Rumors start when Batman is seen entering a room at Wayne Manor, halfway through a gala, and five minutes later a ruffled looking Bruce Wayne exits, hastily rebuttoning his shirt

[batbabydamian]

so, Batman #147… rambling about the difference in how Zdarsky portrays the two current Robins

this is a fantastic run for Tim, and very much written like a return to form of what plenty consider the best dynamic duo, but even more so "the best Robin". once Damian's introduced in this run, Zdarsky really makes sure you still know that lol

1. "We don't need anyone else" VS "I need my family"

#147 clearly exemplifies the contrast, so i'll go through it first. Damian, having fallen for Zurr's lie and accepted him as the real Bruce, goes so far as to say in the very first page "We don't need anyone else." it's cold colors, machinery, and hollow declarations of "father and son" for these two.

towards the ending, Tim has deduced where the real Bruce is hiding and brings him food expecting Bruce's knack for self-neglect. it's all warmth, sunshine, and mutual understanding - also a cute back and forth of "Batman and Robin" between them. on top of this, where Damian isolates Batman & Robin from family, Tim is the one to remind Bruce about "helping each other." Bruce heartily agrees with "I need my family" for a weighty end.

along with this parallel, from #138 Tim makes it clear that even in opposition, he's only ever trying to help Bruce. Damian was still on the wrong side with Zurr-induced-Bruce here at the time too 😭

2. Tim's independence as both a hero and partner

Tim is written as the ideal Robin to Bruce's Batman, and has made Robin its own independent hero on equal footing rather than a sidekick - it's made in statements by both Tim and Bruce, and through the entire narrative. he takes initiative and tries to foresee what would ultimately help Bruce. beyond being great partners, there's many bits showing their emotional connection ("i'm scared of being lost, but i'm more scared of losing you, Bruce" hit me like a bag of bricks). tbh this almost could be a Batman and Robin run lol

added the first panel from #126 of Tim declaring he's his own hero outside of Bruce, proven plenty especially in his backups in #131-134!! the other panels are a few highlights from #128, #130, and #135 of the partnership between Tim and Bruce

granted it's Zurr, but Damian is mostly seen following orders and given pensive looking panels when there's something concerning. While Tim continued to represent Batman's ideals during his own solo quest to find Bruce, Damian doesn't question or take action against "Bruce's" sudden shift in ethics

Batman #134 Backup - Tim showing support toward Toyman VS Batman #146 - Zurr and Damian confront Harley as she pleads about her change of heart

another kiinda parallel in #147 is Bruce acknowledging Tim's hard work to become Robin compared to Damian who's out here going Batman and Robin/Father and Son. i don't think it's an intended parallel but just the state of continuing to show Tim in a better light - Tim put in the effort "to become the second-best Robin" while Damian is Robin because..."son." supposedly less effort on his part too, because LOA.

second pic is from Batman/Catwoman The Gotham War: Scorched Earth, felt fitting to add since Tim mentions needing to "know everything" in both. and the humble brag. which ofc Tim believes Dick is the best!! but also. jic we didn't know Tim is the best current Robin sdfgh

3. Damian's blind loyalty as "Bruce's son"

there's a weight to the Robin title when regarding Tim, whereas Damian's "Robin" role is excess and counterintuitive. he's delegated to desperate sidekick to Bruce, as well as becoming an obstacle to the family. being Robin only seems significant to Damian in how it ties himself to his father, and his single Robin quality is a loyalty that's been written to an extreme fault. the only positive angle i could see this in is Zdarsky aiming to put Damian in a sympathetic light in how far Damian was willing to fall to stay by his father's side, hence, fooled by that nightmare story/confession. the problem with this is that we have not seen a single emotional connection between the two in this run, so why should we care about that relationship.

also, Damian constantly bringing up his position as Bruce's son just makes him look entitled? since Bruce rightfully expressed his claim of having the others as his sons too (with the unfortunate exclusion of his daughter)! so it's like a "lol you're not that special" vibe when looking at it from the outside?? ykw concerning #138, Damian saying "You're the one trying to destroy my father" also could have been in contrast to Tim saying "We'll help our dad" at the end.

Zdarsky seems to believe the only meaningful part of Damian being Robin is he's the son of Bruce, and not a single nod to any noble aspect Damian's achieved beyond that. we're constantly reminded of Tim's greatest hits as Robin, from taking on the mantle to pull Bruce out of darkness (#135, #138), mastermind a whole takedown (Gotham War: Scorched Earth), and always being on the same wavelength with Bruce etc. the entire run sings Tim's praise, and it's deserved!! my problem is how it's in stark contrast to Damian's portrayal of being the other Robin who's only special because he believes he's the greatest son and wants to be at Bruce's side.

so all this to say, if your fav is Tim YOU'RE EATING WELL!! personally as a chronic enjoyer of things, this has been an entertaining run! as a chronic enjoyer of Damian, it's definitely not for many of his fans at this point in time.

i did like this part!! his grin!!

[gffa]

Okay, not to defend Gotham War or anything, but I think I'm talking myself into liking what I see it's trying to do. Starting with some great tags on this post:

#i get why people are hating on it i really really do. trust me#but TO BE FAIR... zdarsky has been making it overwhelmingly clear that bruce is SERIOUSLY unwell right now#like it's been nonstop Horrors for him for like. over a dozen issues straight. with no rest or time to process. and he doesn't have alfred#who was a HUGE part of his support system not to mention the finances etc etc#iirc there's even a panel that pretty much outright states that this is more of an issue of control than morality#and that includes the choosing sides thing like the batkids seem more concerned w how bruce is going off the fucking rails than#just the moral aspects#anyway (via @clownprince)

#Batman#Bruce Wayne#REAL#REAL REAL REAL#LIKE. Zur En Arrh is a LITERAL Defense Mechanism going Malignant at this point#Not only that but throughout Zdarsky's run there's been allusions to illnesses and Bruce Not Having A Good Time#Not Having a Good Time and Not Having Time At All to take stock of the sheer What The Fuck-ery that's been going on recently#Because it's been a CONSTANT steam of What The Fuck-ery nonstop#And the Worse is yet to come if one considers the future issues synopsis and the ''I am a Gun'' story by Zdarsky#(At most I'm a little bit concerned over how Zdarsky will try to wrap this up‚ but that's a normal concern especially about Comics)#(Especially Batman Comics considering how often Editorial likes to... do things) (via @kaosvrow)

I agree with so much of the criticism of Gotham War, especially that the arguments for or against Selina's plans are absolute garbage by characters who should be making better arguments and that the other characters are being used as bobbleheads instead of actually giving them their canon personalities--and, okay, I will also point out that in the VERY FIRST ISSUE, Selina's plan gets someone killed and so I'm willing to extend some grace that the story isn't trying to push forward that either way is actually right, I honestly don't think it's about that. I think it's a story about Bruce Wayne's mental state, because Zdarsky's been building this up for awhile now, like the issue immediately prior to Knight Terrors? Shows us Bruce's mental state is ALREADY absolute TRASH right then:

Zur-En-Arrh was already leaking through the seams of his mind, he was already feeling the impending doom of everything he cared about being burned away, that his mind literally couldn't watch his kids being happy and together and getting along without feeling like it was all burning to ash.

And then Knight Terrors happened, which was one more thing digging hard, boney fingers into his trauma, and he handled it pretty well in the moment, but it's such a giant, non-stop pile of stress on a mind that is already damaged to hell and back because of his trauma.

Further, the very first issue of the Gotham War storyline? The very first panel, the one that sets up the stage of what's going to happen, makes a very clear point about how this is about Bruce fracturing:

And then on the very next page, Zur-En-Arrh is literally stalking at the bars of the cage around Bruce's mind.

And then Bruce wakes up and it's immediately more establishing just how worried everyone is about him because so much has been piled on lately:

Bruce hides his missing hand from his family, just like he's trying to hide how scraped thin he is right now, and goes out on patrol.

Where his internal monologue is all about how defensive he feels lately, how he feels like the years are catching up to him, how nothing feels right but this, making it clear that Bruce is hanging onto Batman with a death grip because it's the only thing that feels stable to him right now.

And all of this is in the first TEN PAGES of the first issue, this is our set-up, this is our foundation, this is what we're being given to understand what this story is about. Then Batman #137 happens and it's literally ALL ABOUT BRUCE'S MENTAL SPACE, that Selina's plan is the catalyst, not the driving point behind all of it. Again, I'm in 100% agreement that the Batkids are acting like cardboard cutouts because you will never get me to believe that they didn't notice crime going down or that they wouldn't be pointing out that Gotham's wealthy are just going to start making their security lethal in response or that the Court of Owls won't step in, that this is not a long term solution to giving these people lives beyond crime, or even that a lot of them should be agreeing with Bruce, that they don't get to decide who is an acceptable victim. But the story isn't really about changing up the way comics deal with crime, it's about even the Batkids are framing it in terms of how it's about Bruce. Jason is really the only one who seems onboard with trying out Selina's plan, but even his confrontation with Bruce isn't really about that, it's about all their baggage, their fight immediately becomes about how angry Jason is at the way Bruce has treated him. This fight isn't happening because Jason's a true believer in Selina's plan, it's happening because he's angry at Bruce and Bruce is in a shitty mental place, after all the non-stop horrors AND feeling like he's been betrayed by the kids who he thought understood that people being victims wasn't acceptable, and so he lashes out at Jason.

When they fight, it's not because they're siding against Bruce, it's because he's become unstable and dangerous. The why of it doesn't matter, it's not about that.

(And I'm actually okay with the way that fight happened because I can buy that, for example, Cass might be holding back against him, she's a stronger fighter than he is, but he's being ruthless because of the state he's in, while she might be feeling more cautious.) When they fight, it's not because they're siding against Bruce, it's because he's become unstable and dangerous. The why of it doesn't matter, it's not about that. Even further, when Bruce fights against his kids, he's wrong and biased, especially in the fight with Dick, who he thinks has a sloppy offensive and doesn't know darkness like he does--to which Dick just immediately cracks him in the face because, yeah, Dick Grayson does know darkness and Bruce isn't as untouchable as he's trying to make himself seem (because being Batman is all he has right now).

I think it's important that it's Dick who defies his expectations here, because this story is building off context of what happened between Selina and Bruce, that they were truly together for awhile, they were about to get married--Selina mentions that it the first issue, it's a major thorn in that conversation when she throws out how she doesn't believe that Gotham needs Batman anymore, it needs her.

She's giving him what he said he always wanted, she's giving him the thing that kept them apart, he should be happy, should they head to the church now? Saying that he won't because he wants to be Batman more than he wants to solve the city's problems.

The failed wedding between them is important in part because of what Selina's saying here, illustrating that both of them are bringing a lot of baggage to the table but also because of what else happened during that storyline, why the context is so important. Because that storyline dovetailed into one about Bane wanting to take over Gotham and he needed Batman unstable and distracted, which was working after Selina left him at the altar, he was a mess. But you know what was saving him at the time, bringing him back from the ledge? THIS KID:

Dick was the one poking and prodding at Bruce with jokes and warmth and care and it was working. He actually got Bruce to cry in front of him, to release some actual genuine emotion!

Dick makes Bruce more emotionally stable, to the point that Bane had to hire KGBeast to shoot Dick in the head just because he was so good at stabilizing Bruce--this is also why Dick's the one who says he'll go talk Bruce down off his moral ledge in Batman #137.

So, it's Dick that has to be the one to defy his expectations in the fight, has to be the one who breaks through Bruce's offense and knocks him down in what feels like a betrayal even when it isn't, because this isn't a story about who's right and who's wrong, it's a story about Bruce isolating himself because he's mentally fractured to hell and back, because he's not trusting his kids, he's still hurt by Selina leaving him, he's still grieving Alfred's death, he's run ragged physically and emotionally and mentally by a series of exhausting horrors piled on him, he's lost his family's fortune, he's not even living in his own family home anymore. (I focus on Dick here as an illustration of tying this back to previous examples of Bruce crumbling and important context that the storyline is drawing on, but Gotham War isn't really specifically about Bruce and Dick's relationship, but more about Bruce's relationship with all his kids, like Tim and Jason and Damian all have equally important moments. But it's a very direct example of how his children are a huge part of his support system and draw him back from the ledge of being just Batman and back into being Bruce.) That's why the issue ends with Bruce getting the papers telling him that the bank sold Wayne Manor to Vandal Savage, because it's one more thing that's stripping Bruce Wayne away from the character, and leaving him with nothing but Batman and Zur-En-Arrh. Gotham War isn't actually a story about a war for Gotham. It's a story about Bruce Wayne going out of control and everything is written to serve that. The characters' fights are catalyzed by Selina's plans, but they quickly become about Bruce's relationship with the characters. The narrative makes heavy-handed points about Bruce feeling like he's losing his grip, that he's hallucinating and talking to himself, that he is extremely mentally unwell right now. Everything Zdarsky's been writing (like especially the "I Am a Gun" storyline right before Knight Terrors) has been building up to fracturing Bruce Wayne.

[dulltoned]

Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four | Chapter Five | Chapter Six | Chapter Seven

Floyd was curled up in bed cuddled into his lilac sweater, sat up against the headboard wrapped in a cozy pink quilt. This sweater was quickly becoming one of his favorite things. Poppy's gifts were always well-made and soft to the touch but one of these days Floyd was going to insist she stop giving him things. For the moment, however, he was more than content to swaddle himself in the small comforts. He's been holed up in his room most of the day, excluding the one time he left to go make himself a cup of tea, but it's not a bad day by any means. He feels great, all things considered, with only a nearly imperceptible weakness in his limbs and a vague chill burrowed into his bones. It's a good day to be nestled into his blankets with a nice book.

A firm knock at his door gets his attention and a quick glance at the clock mounted on the wall tells him it's half past noon. Oh, he's been holed up in here much longer than he'd thought. He puts his book aside and climbs out of bed, allowing himself a few extra seconds to stretch, and goes to open the door. John Dory is on the other side, his usual self-satisfied grin nowhere to be seen and a worry in his eyes that immediately puts Floyd on edge. "BroZone meeting," John says it so seriously that Floyd can't even find it in himself to roll his eyes at the phrasing.

"What's going on?" Floyd doesn't wait to ask as he follows John out into the bunker. It's weird to see his eldest brother so noticeably thrown off. John Dory wasn't one to wear his more uncomfortable emotions on his face where the world could see them.

John Dory doesn't answer, instead ushering Floyd over to the elevator. "The others are already in the kitchen," He half-explains, pulling Floyd up onto the platform and pushing up the lever at the same time. "It's Branch." That's all it takes to make Floyd's anxiety skyrocket. Branch? Branch was pretty reserved and he's been a little tense the past few days but he seemed okay. Did something terrible happen? Is he okay? Branch was so independent. What could have happened that John Dory called them all together with such grave intensity? John Dory was dramatic but it's never caused unwarranted worry before.

Floyd fidgets with his paws while they silently ride the elevator up, brows furrowed in thought while he stews in the worry rising in his chest. He clearly wasn't as in tune with Branch as he thought he was despite the one-on-one time they spent together most mornings. The elevator comes to a stop and Floyd is the first one off the platform. He moves swiftly past John Dory and rushes into the kitchen to find his other brothers, excluding Branch, already sitting around the kitchen table with matching expressions of concern on their faces. Great. "Do any of you have any idea what's going on?"

"No," Bruce shakes his head, "John just showed up all out of sorts so we figured it was serious." Clay nods along, gesturing to Bruce in a show of agreement.

"Because it is serious," John Dory insists as he steps into the kitchen after Floyd, circling around to stand at the table. "There's something wrong with Bitty B." He swears. Floyd is hoping that this is another game of the Troll who cried Bergen. John could blow things out of proportion sometimes and Floyd would prefer that to something being actually wrong. "He nearly bit my head off thirty minutes ago." Oh, okay. Maybe this actually wasn't so bad.

"I think before we go overboard here you should tell us what you did." Bruce cuts in, watching John warily. No one was willing to outright dismiss their eldest brother but it was hard not to take this with a grain of salt. Branch was snappy. He didn't like to be pushed and his boundaries weren't all out there yet so it was easy for one of them to overstep, John Dory especially. John was never one to stop his pestering, even when there were clear signs that he was pushing too hard.

"Nothing!" John throws his hands into the air and his tone turns exasperated. Floyd rolls his eyes fondly and crosses his arms, silently urging John Dory to continue. "He came home with this cute little picnic packed up and I asked him if it was for Poppy." Floyd waits for more but it becomes clear that there wasn't anything else John Dory had to add.

"That's it?" Clay presses in disbelief.

"That's it!" John nods quickly, leaning against one of the chairs and gesticulating with his gloved hand, "He looked at me and I swear he was about to break into tears right there. I tried to ask him what was wrong and he snapped at me to leave him the hell alone." He looks at them expectantly, eyebrows raised while he waits for them to admit defeat.

"That… sounds rough, actually." Clay is the first to break, the concerned crease between his brows returning with a vengeance. "Did you get anything out of him?" John offers a dejected shake of his head and they all share a collective sigh. Of course not. It was wishful thinking to assume that Branch would willingly open himself up to them, let alone when he was clearly already in distress.

"I doubt he's gonna wanna talk about it guys," Floyd reminds them softly, smiling sadly when they all turn to look at him. "He's not really open on a good day and I don't think forcing him to talk about whatever's going on is gonna make it better." It's not like the rest of them were getting together to share their feelings or anything but sentimental conversations sparked up naturally between the four older brothers. Branch seemed to actively avoid them and usually fled when things got too emotional for him. They've all had their moments with their youngest sibling, sure, but it was also obvious to all of them that Branch had been uncomfortable. Floyd doubts that whatever this is about is something Branch will want to share during a cuddle pile on the couch.

"Yeah, but haven't you noticed how tense he is all the time?" John Dory retorts. Honestly, out of all of them, Floyd half-expected John to be the least aware of Branch. Not in a particularly bad way, no, but the teal troll wasn't known for being the most observant when they were kids. It was hard to remember that maybe the last twenty years changed them all a lot more than Floyd initially thought. "Clearly whatever's going on with him isn't getting better on its own and we can't just sit here and wait for him to break down."

"Of course not," Bruce assures readily. He has a thoughtful expression on his face and Floyd really hopes that whatever he's thinking could help them figure out what to do. "Floyd is right, though, we can't pry it out of him. We'll only make it worse if we do that." They share a few more silent looks around the table and a familiar feeling of helplessness is starting to stir in Floyd. He can't help but remember the little blue trolling that he could pick up and settle on his lap. Back then Branch was so easy to cheer up, all it took was a quick little song or a fun story to distract the baby from his woes. Now Floyd doesn't even know where to start. He doesn't know what Branch has been through or how to comfort him. He doesn't even know how to approach it if Branch is having a rough time.

"I think he'd more likely shut down than open up if we try to force it out of him," Clay sighs, folding his arms on top of the table. They all murmur their agreement. If it were any other situation Floyd would be amused at the sight of them all huddled up around the kitchen trying to figure out what made their baby brother cry. The horrifying thought is that he can't imagine what could make Branch cry. Branch was a tough cookie but John Dory was right, Branch has been on edge from the moment they stepped foot in his bunker. There were times when the tension let up and Branch enjoyed himself but there was always wariness in his eyes. Floyd had really hoped that it would ease up on its own as they all got used to being around each other again. He's saddened to see that apparently it's only built up until Branch couldn't carry it anymore. It needed to be addressed, that was certain, but they were all stumped on how to go about it. "We need a plan. At least an outline on how to start." Floyd was really glad to have more than one plan-oriented brother right now. It feels wrong to conspire against Branch like this but it feels worse to just let his little brother keep hurting the way he clearly has been.

"I think the best approach is to test the waters first," Floyd steps further into the room, finally pulling out a chair and taking a seat at the table, "We need to make sure that he's receptive before we move forward with whatever we're gonna do." His brothers nod but John Dory looks a little unsure.

"Are we sure he'll ever be receptive?" John Dory brings up a painfully good point, looking between his brothers with earnest uncertainty. It's clear that John's desire to push comes from a place of real concern but that didn't mean it couldn't cause problems. It was important to stop him in his tracks before he got too far. Pushing Branch only ever led to the divide between them growing.

Bruce clears his throat, looking sorrowful when he speaks, "I think there's a decent chance that he won't talk to us." Floyd frowns, averting his gaze at the reminder. It was a fair thought, really. What right did they have to assume that they could just pop back into Branch's life and be part of his support system? The only person Floyd had ever seen Branch be actually vulnerable with was Poppy and that was only a few brief glimpses of soft moments meant for just the two of them.

"If push comes to shove we might just need to recruit Poppy and hope she can get it out of him." Floyd agrees with a sigh. His eyes are a little misty at the thought of being so useless when it comes to helping the people closest to him but he knows that he couldn't just insert himself back into Branch's life like that. If what he needs to do is rat his brother out to his girlfriend then that'll have to be enough.

"Well--" John cuts himself off and his ears perk. Floyd frowns and shares a confused look with Clay before he tries to listen for whatever caught John Dory's attention. For a moment there's nothing and he opens his mouth to ask what the oldest had heard but then he hears it. Footsteps. They're carefully tiptoeing up the stairs toward the kitchen and there was only one troll they could belong to. Floyd looks to Bruce and then Clay but his siblings look just as startled as he is. Obviously Branch hadn't heard them, right? There was no way he would be coming up here if he heard them talking about him, right?

The footsteps are only getting closer the more they sit in silence and Floyd gestures in quiet panic to the back hallway. What are we gonna say? He tries to convey in his sharp movements. They hadn't gotten anywhere besides acknowledging that Branch would want nothing to do with this conversation but if Branch had been on the verge of tears only a mere hour ago it would probably be hard to ignore.

John Dory blinks and gestures to himself, the how am I supposed to know? is easy to pick up.

Clay jerks his head towards the back hallway in obvious warning that Branch is nearly there and tries to lean casually against the table so it looks like they haven't been panicking over the dumbest thing. They all scramble to follow Clay's lead and only just manage to get themselves settled before Branch appears around the corner. Their youngest brother stops in his tracks the second he notices that the kitchen is more occupied than he thought. Floyd watches as a flurry of emotions flits across Branch's face; anger, yearning, fear--

"Hey B," John Dory greets with an awkward wave that cuts through the silence.

"Hey," Branch grunts, moving further into the room. He very intentionally keeps his eyes straight ahead as he steps over to the counter and reaches up to get a cup from the cabinets.

Floyd shares a determined look with Bruce before he turns his attention back to Branch. "Are you doing okay?" He decides that the best approach would be a direct one. Beating around the bush with Branch only ever leads to confusion or irritation and Floyd doesn't want to risk blowing anything out of proportion. He just wants to help.

Branch only offers a noncommittal hum and slams his cup down harder than necessary. Floyd can see his grip is so tight his hand is shaking. Not a great start but he hasn't exactly shut them down yet either. They should proceed with caution but Floyd would try to keep an eye on Branch's reactions so he can help calm things down if he needed to. He wants to avoid causing any more problems and he doesn't want to hurt Branch in their quest to figure him out.

"It's just that you've been pretty tense recently," Bruce pipes up, testing the waters with more awareness and care than Floyd would have expected from him. Being a parent had really changed his brother in a lot of really amazing ways. It's nice to see someone else in their family is experienced in the gentle approach now. "We were wondering if we could do anything to help."

Branch keeps his back towards them but the kitchen is small and Floyd is sitting at the end of the table. He can see the side of Branch's face even if it's still mostly obscured and he can see how his little brother clenches his jaw and takes a calming breath. "I'm fine," Branch says after a long stretch of silence. His voice is toneless and strained and Floyd can't help but cringe.

"It's just that you were pretty pissed earlier," John starts. He looks like he's about to make a joke but he thinks better of it. Instead, he sighs and straightens out his goggles absentmindedly. "We're just worried. It doesn't seem like you're doing alright." That was surprisingly heartfelt coming from John Dory. He's sincere and quiet and the worry seeps into his words.

Branch sighs and braces his hands against the counter, hanging his head and leaving his cup forgotten beside him. Floyd's gut twists and his heart thumps anxiously in his chest. He's seen Branch uneasy and uncomfortable and upset, he's seen Branch happy and shy and lovesick, but he's never seen Branch look so genuinely defeated. "Branch?" He presses softly, "Are you okay?" He echoes his earlier question and watches as Branch deflates.

__

Branch doesn't know how to handle this. He didn't really expect John Dory to follow up and he definitely hadn't been prepared for all of his brothers to confront him together. He hates listening to them like this. They sound so worried and he has no idea what to do. The mask slipped and he lost his temper and it seems like it wasn't something he could just sweep under the rug this time. He holds the counter in an iron grip and allows his weight to lean further and further into the edge. How the hell is he supposed to answer that? How does he explain to his brothers that he can't remember the last time he could genuinely and sincerely say he was doing great and that okay felt like a few and far between? "Does it matter?" He mumbles in lieu of a real answer.

There's a sharp inhale behind him and Branch flinches at the sound. Great. He hadn't meant to sound so dismissive but he couldn't take it back now. He's just so tired. He's exhausted, both from the nightmares keeping him up night after night and from the turmoil that seemed to constantly rage inside of him. He feels like he's just been coasting through the days, letting everything build up until it all inevitably came to a head. He was a fool to think he could escape the consequences. He knew better than to think it would all just even out and go away but he had hoped. He let himself and hope and look where it got him. How stupid could he be?

"Of course it matters, bro," Clay soothes quietly. There's a tension in the air that was only getting thicker and Branch wonders if the others could feel it too. "We wanna know if you're alright."

"Do you?" Branch asks bitterly. He hadn't meant to say it but it feels useless to hold his tongue now. He's kept it all inside for too long and it's drained him completely. He's hollow in a way that's terrifyingly familiar, a frightening reminder of how he lived for almost two decades of his life, and he's so sick of it. He wants to feel okay again and he can't keep burying it all deep down. It's twisting him up inside and leaving him with a painfully short fuse and he can't do this anymore.

"Of course we do!" John Dory sounds offended at the mere thought that Branch could possibly think otherwise and that's not fair. He doesn't get to be hurt that Branch doubts them. He has no right. Branch grits his teeth and his eyes are burning again and damn it he's getting worked up again--

"Since when!" Branch snaps, ripping his hands away from the counter and whirling around to glare daggers at his family. His family. The family who left him and came back only because they needed him. Would they have ever come back at all if he wasn't a necessary part of helping Floyd? "You all left. You left me alone and I had no one for most of my life!" He's screaming now. He's screaming and his eyes are burning but he doesn't think he has any energy left to care. "Grandma died and I spent twenty years being the outcast of the village and then you all just come back and assume that things are okay? That I'm okay?" Branch slams his hands against his chest in a wild gesture to himself and lets out a desperate, almost hysterical laugh. His brothers are staring at him with wide-eyed expressions of shock and he should really stop before he does something that will be irreparable but now that he's started he doesn't think he can stop. "No, I'm not okay! I haven't been okay in a long time! I'm trying really, really hard to hold myself together but sometimes I'm so pissed at all of you I don't know what to do with myself. Sometimes I can't even fucking look at any of you because it hurts. You can't expect me to think that all of you care about how I feel when all of you walked out on me and didn't even look back!"

Branch realizes that he should calm down. His chest is heaving with each breath but he's never let any of this out before and the release is addicting. He's fruitlessly blinking back the tears quickly filling his eyes and beneath all the anger and pain he feels guilt for putting those devastated expressions on his brothers' faces but he can't seem to reel himself in. "Did I ever even matter to any of you?" He asks, scrubbing a frantic hand across his face to wipe away the tears when they start to fall. "The only person who even said goodbye was Floyd, the only person who cared was Floyd. If you didn't need me would you have ever come back?" The guilty look on John's face is enough of an answer for him.

He runs his hands through his hair and grits his teeth against the sob bubbling up in his throat. He's realizing that maybe he didn't really put himself together as well as he thought back in his room and he might be having a breakdown in front of his brothers. The realization isn't enough to stop it from happening. He's already lost himself to the panic and desperation curling up beneath his ribs. His hands were shaking and his chest was getting tight but he knew from experience that he couldn't stop this now that it's started and he could already feel the humiliation starting to bloom on top of it all.

"Branch," Floyd gets his attention. Somewhere along the line the other troll had stood up from the table and took a few cautious steps closer, hands held up to show he meant no harm. "Breathe, buddy, come on." Branch instinctively tries to take a breath at the gentle coaxing but the air gets caught in his throat. Floyd only offers an encouraging smile and nods for him to try again.

Branch stutters through the first few breaths, leaning heavily back against the counter and wrapping his arms tightly around himself in a pathetic attempt to physically hold himself together. Floyd doesn't push him and the others watch on in curious silence. They look at Branch with such sad eyes and Branch wants to be angry but he can't. He's too tired to be angry anymore. He's burnt out. He breathes with Floyd's kind encouragements urging him to keep going and slowly but surely he calms down enough to force the stiffness out of his legs and drop unceremoniously to the floor. He ignores the startled cries around him and tugs his legs up to his chest, burying his face into his knees to hide the tears shamefully coating his cheeks. "I'm sorry," he breathes. He can't believe he just yelled at them like that. He'll be lucky if they even want to stay with him after this.

"Hey, Branch, look at me," Branch lifts his head to see Bruce kneeling on the floor beside him. Bruce still gave him plenty of room, staying a few feet away to avoid crowding him, and Branch felt a brief spark of gratitude at the consideration, "I think you had the right to blow up at us. You've been holding all that in for a while, huh? And none of us ever really brought it up. I guess we all just assumed that it was water under the bridge." Bruce has the decency to look sheepish at the admission. Branch huffs and tries again to wipe away his tears. It's a losing battle, the tears are still falling, but he feels like he has to try all the same.

"I think we're the ones who should be sorry," Clay sighs, rubbing the back of his neck, "I don't think any of us wanted to admit that we messed up. It wasn't cool of us to leave you behind and then just assume that everything would be fine. I'm sorry, Branch." The apology is unexpected. Branch thinks that maybe it shouldn't be but it still comes as a shock to him.

"You already apologized," Branch reminds him.

"I'm not apologizing for missing out on you growing up," Clay disagrees, shaking his head and offering a sad smile, "I'm apologizing because I walked out and because I never came back. It hurt you a lot, the least I can do is acknowledge that." Oh. A lump forms in Branch's throat and the tears pick up speed. He feels ridiculous and childish curled up on the kitchen floor with his brothers huddled around him offering comforting words but he can't deny that a part of him feels hopeful too. Hope was a terrifying, disappointing thing but it led him to Poppy so maybe… maybe he could try to see where this goes too.

"Thanks," Branch sniffs, wrapping his arms around his legs and drawing them closer to his chest.

"The least any of us could do is acknowledge it," John Dory steps away from the table and comes around to kneel beside Bruce, "I'm sorry I left, Branch. I could give you a million different reasons but at the end of the day none of them really matter, do they?" John Dory offers a bitter laugh, meeting Branch's gaze with sad eyes, "It wasn't fair to you and I never should've just walked back into your life like it never happened. I'm glad Poppy convinced you to come along but I should've said this all then. That's my fault, Bitty B. After everything we put you through you have every right to be angry." That's the most mature John has ever been, Branch thinks. At least with him. No condescension, no punchline. Just a sincere and heartfelt apology.

"I think that's the most serious I've ever heard you," Floyd playfully teases from Branch's other side and Branch notices that Floyd lowered himself down to the floor too. Clay is already walking over to sit beside the pink-haired troll, completing their messy half-circle.

"Shut up," John Dory laughs, picking up a loose rock tucked under the door of a cabinet and flicking it over at Floyd.

"Seriously, though, Branch. You aren't the one who should apologize. It's us." Floyd assures warmly, the same sad smile on his face but it's fond now too. "I'm sorry that you felt you had to keep this in. I know we haven't been the best brothers in the world but you can talk to us. You've been there for us," Floyd looks around at the others and Branch watches as they all nod in eager agreement. "Let us be there for you, okay?"

Branch frowns. As good as that sounds he doesn't like vulnerability. He's very intentionally kept to himself for a long, long time and the idea of relying on someone else was still very new to him. He's learned that nothing is certain in life and that everything good could be gone in a moment. The only thing he could rely on was himself. He knows this. But Poppy's taught him that even though good things might be fleeting they're also wonderful. Poppy came into his life and brought with her a happiness that's evaded him since he was just a trolling and now he can't imagine living without her. What would he be denying himself if he decided that this was too good to be true? He missed his brothers so much all these years and they're here now because they care about him more than he ever could have hoped for. "Okay." Branch decides before he can overthink it. He wants this so badly he can allow himself to take the risk. If everything collapses and it all fails he knows that at least he'll have Poppy with him in the aftermath.

His brothers sag a little with relief. Bruce claps a hand on John Dory's shoulder and Clay slings a celebratory arm around Floyd's shoulders. Floyd's expression softens, "Thanks, Branch. I know that this sucks but we won't let you down." Branch huffs an amused breath but lets a shaky grin form in response.

"So what's been going on?" John Dory asks as he shifts into a more comfortable position, crossing his legs beneath him and giving Branch his full attention. It's equally overwhelming and appreciated.

"Nothing," Floyd and Bruce give him matching stern looks. Branch rolls his eyes but concedes, "Really, it's nothing. I've just been having nightmares again recently and it's made me more on edge than usual." He pointedly ignores Clay mouthing again? at their brothers and focuses his eyes instead on the dirt floor. He sighs and buries his face into his knees again, "I'm supposed to be normal now."

"What do you mean?" Bruce asks with genuine confusion. Branch can't help but offer a resentful snort. Right, like Branch was the epitome of normal when it came to trolls. "You only need to be you, Branch." That catches Branch off guard and he peeks over at Bruce with a doubtful expression. Bruce only smiles, "I'm serious. I remember what you said to Viva back at that golf course you know. I'm sure you've spent a lot of time in this bunker and I know that Poppy of yours invites you to all sorts of things but no one wants you to be something you're not. You don't need to be like everyone else. We don't want you to be like everyone else." That's an angle that Branch hadn't really considered before. Branch often entertained the idea that Poppy invited him to so many parties and events because she wanted him to be more like a regular pop troll. Despite the fact that Poppy's always respected his boundaries he has an underlying fear that she wants him to change but she's even walked him home before when a party proved to be too much for him.

"Oh." Branch murmurs, still uncertain.

"You're weird," John cuts in and startles at the resulting incredulous shouts of his name. He raises his hands in surrender, "But that's what makes you you. We wouldn't love you if you weren't you, kid."

"Not a kid," Branch grumbles more on instinct than anything. He sighs, reaching up and tangling his hands in his hair, "But trolls are supposed to be fun. I'm not fun. I don't like big parties and too many sweets make me sick and I prioritize safety over entertainment--"

"You don't need to be fun all the time," Clay cuts him off before Branch can start spiraling again. Branch huffs and Clay shrugs apologetically. "You don't have to have fun all the time. Everybody needs their downtime and if you need more quiet time than the next troll that doesn't make you defective." Clay reaches out, telegraphing his movements carefully so Branch has plenty of time to pull away, and carefully untangles Branch's paws from his hair. "Besides, you're plenty of fun. I have a great time whenever we talk about the layout of this place and your organization system."

"Nerds," Bruce coughs into his fist.

"The point is," Floyd rolls his eyes but he looks happy. "Fun or no fun, quiet or loud, there's nothing wrong with being different. No one should ever force you to be someone you're not, and we don't want you to be anyone else." Branch feels a hesitant burst of warmth struggling to form beneath the uncertainty wriggling in his gut. The hope is growing with each passing moment but he's still scared of what it could lead to. He's been disappointed so many times.

Branch shakes his head, "It's not enough." He disagrees. There were plenty of trolls in the village that were still on the fence about him. He's seen the weird looks he gets sometimes when he's in town and the disapproval when he's with Poppy. No one is vocal about it and most of the village has been open to him being a part of the community but that doesn't erase the years of him being the outcast party-pooper. "I'm not enough."

"You're perfect." Branch's head snaps up and he stares at John Dory in disbelief. John Dory said it so vehemently and his face his set in a stern expression. The small, wounded part of Branch that always believed that he was the reason the band disbanded is squirming beneath his skin.

"What?" Branch breathes, laughing awkwardly at what he assumed had to be a joke.

"You're perfect, Branch. Never, and I mean never, imply that you're anything less than that again." John seems almost angry but Branch has to be imagining that. He looks genuinely upset at the idea that Branch could possibly think so little of himself but that seems unlikely. "Branch you have two seconds to tell me no before I touch you," Oh, what? That's a weird sentence-- but suddenly his face is cupped in John Dory's hands and his focus zeroes in on his brother. "You are amazing. You're a little rough around the edges but so is everyone. This past month you've been nothing but accommodating to us. You dug us out whole rooms in your home just because you wanted us to stay with you, that's crazy. You're dedicated, brilliant, and even kind under all that sharp wit. You are way more than just enough, little brother, you're perfect." Branch blinks stupidly up at John Dory and a few more tears tumble down his cheeks. John smiles sadly as he brushes them away with a few gentle strokes of his thumbs.

Branch sniffs pitifully and pulls away, scrubbing at his eyes with a startled laugh, "Jeez, isn't Floyd supposed to be the sensitive one?" He tries to joke but it comes out strained and teary. They all chuckle anyway and Branch is grateful that they're giving him a moment to try and compose himself. "I'm still sorry I yelled." He admits after a few beats.

"Psh, it's fine," Bruce waves him off easily. "You clearly needed to get some stuff out. What else is family for?" He assures lightheartedly.

"I know it's not hug time, but can we hug you?" Floyd asks. Branch moves to say no on instinct but Floyd is looking at him with pleading eyes and Branch honestly thinks that he could use one too.

"Fine, I guess," He grumbles and Floyd doesn't hesitate to swoop in and gather him up. The others don't take long to follow his lead. It's only a few seconds before Branch finds himself at the center of a cuddle pile. There are elbows jabbed into his side and someone's hair is tickling his nose but somehow he can't remember the last time he felt so safe and comfortable. "Thank you." He whispers into the bundle of warmth and support surrounding him.

"We'll always be here for you, okay?" Floyd says.

"Okay." Branch replies and finally lets the hope win.

[ramsywasalittlelamb]

cover up and say goodnight, say goodnight

a batfamily agere fic! 2.7k words, fluff! warnings for mentions of nightmares and fear toxin, never goes in depth!

hello!! ive been super inactive as of late for a multitude of reasons, but mostly bc ive gone back into spy mode of having an online existence lol enjoy the fic! (better to read on ao3 imo!) lmk if i need to add any warnings!

pinterest photo links 1 2 3, title from this must be the place by talking heads!!

First it was Tim.

He had been taken off duty mid-patrol after a dose of fear toxin had been administered to him and possibly Jason. Even though he argued that he was fine, he took an antidote, and they should be more worried about Jason, Bruce persisted until Tim resigned for the night and retreated back to the cave.

He would never admit that his hands trembled with the scenes flashing in his mind on the back of his eyes each time he blinked for a second. 

He would never admit that the hug he received from Alfred upon arriving made him tear up underneath the mask.

He would never admit that in the middle of the night, the lonely openness of the room and the creak in the hallway floorboards began to scare him enough to not sleep, prompting him to go to Bruce’s room because Bruce’s room was safe. Because Bruce was safe.

Bruce squinted in the darkness of his room when a weight dipped his mattress, beginning to sit up to ask what was wrong or if someone was hurt, but soon settled back down when he saw a teary eyed Tim crawling into the bed with Aurora tucked between his arms in a tight hug, thinking he hadn’t woken Bruce up.

Bruce would never admit that Tim woke him up.

Next it was Damian.

He had come home later than Drake but earlier than the others for school purposes, getting enough sleep the night prior was valued for the loud and noisy classmates he had to put up with for a majority of his day, along with getting his homework done on time for the next day.

He had finished his schoolwork, freshened up, and followed his usual routine for the weekdays, ready to sleep.

Except.. something was off.

He had traced back everything he did, and everything he did was in the correct order and routine…

Oh, his pacifier was missing from his bedside table. He must have left it in father’s bedroom from the previous night.

He folded back his covers and trotted down the hall, narrowly avoiding the loud spots on the floor and opening the door to father’s room, only to see Drake and father slumbering.

He continued forward, passing the empty and inviting spot on one of father’s side to grab his pacifier and return back to his bed.

But he paused, eyes and mind darting between the open slot on the mattress and the half open door, revealing the nightlights placed throughout the hall.

Bruce would never be able to explain the selfish disappointment he felt when he heard the door close, only for a burst of joy to replace and erupt in his chest when he felt Damian snuggle against his side, the pacifier knocking against his shoulder in a rhythmic motion.

This time, it wasn’t Jason.

He had been having nightmares on repeat— as if that was new,— the way he had been carrying himself and working the past few nights had been concerning at the very least. Everyone had noticed, but didn’t bring it up, until Dick came over from Bludhaven and took him aside.

Jason had admitted to not having great sleep recently, but had argued that, once again, it wasn’t new to him. He could work it out, push through. And once the nightmares have made their run, everyone can carry on their merry way.

Of course, nothing ever worked out that way for anyone in this family.

His head felt full of just.. a feeling of disturbance, followed by the fact that he was distracted by how his left arm and right leg weren’t cooperating with him, one of scarecrow’s men had whacked him square in the head, sending him to the ground.

The rush of cold air flowing through a crack on his mask hit his face, everything felt so far away. Why does everything feel so fuzzy? Why is someone yelling in my ears? Why are there so many sounds?

The hands under his armpits dragging him from his spot on the floor cut him out of his thoughts, his eyes burning along with his lungs, the loudness in his ears was just too much. He struggled against the hands dragging him, effectively flipping on his stomach and away from the person.

He blinked heavily up at the person, his vision swimming as he squinted at them. Dick? Tim? Bruce? None of those options sounded great to deal with right now.

Next thing he knew, he was jolting awake with panic and fear seizing in his chest, an overwhelming feeling of everything crashing into his system. He wasn’t in his room, he wasn’t even in a safe house, this was the manor.

With remnants of the nightmare leaping around in the fog of his mind, he clutched the sheets closer to him as he tried to move off the bed, but his limbs didn’t want to cooperate. His knees hit the cold floor with a whimper leaving his mouth, tears filling up his eyes quickly as he sat in his own misery.

Then it was Cass.

She almost always sought someone out for cuddles during the night, regressed or not. It was comforting being wrapped up in someone’s arms, but just like tonight, sometimes it was because it just got really cold and lonely in the manor.

Tucking her big bird plush in her arms as she wrapped her fluffy blanket around her shoulders, she ventured out into the hall.

Her hand was on the handle of Bruce’s door, when something felt.. off… There was an icy ache of worry forming in her chest, something in the back of her head to look around first.

Listening to her instincts, she checks all the rooms, some of them missing their owner, making her smile knowing she’ll have more people to hug tonight.

Two rooms, side by side, had light coming from underneath the door. Dick was awake, which was no surprise seeing as he slept until five in the afternoon, but Jason being awake set off the alarms in her head.

Opening it slowly to let him know she was entering, and thankfully not receiving a request to leave, she saw Jason sitting beside his bed with his face hidden by his arms resting on his tucked up knees. The blankets tossed around and his pillow shoved between the wall and mattress. Clearly not a restful night.

She sat beside him, at a distance for his comfort, allowing him all the space and time he needs, but letting him know she was there. She would always be there for them.

“Nightmare.” Jason grumbled, his voice muffled by his position. She hummed, nodding even though she knew he couldn’t see it. She knows how terrible nightmares can be, she also knows how badly they affect everyone in the family differently. Some had gotten used to them and could shake them off easier, meanwhile others couldn’t even close their eyes without an image of the bad dream reappearing.

“It sucks and— and it’s frustrating! I know I get them, and they still get me shaken up when it happens, and it sucks!” He says, throwing his head back against the mattress, letting his arms fall to his side.

Hm, regressed.

She takes big bird from her arms and places him into Jason’s lap. If he helps her take her mind off bad things, he should help Jason do the same.

“Big bird? What am I supposed to do with it?” He wipes his nose with his sleeve with a small scowl and questioning look at the plush.

“Him.” She corrects, “Hug.”

He pauses, looking between Cass and Big bird, before picking up the stuffed animal and hugging it, releasing a breath of what seemed like relief.

“Come.” Cass says after letting Jason have a moment of peace with big bird, standing up and reaching a hand out for Jason to take.

He takes it, the two of them walking hand in hand a little further in the hallway to Bruce’s room. Jason pauses at the doorway, but Cass pats his hand, nodding with encouragement.

Cass lays with her back to Tim, scooting as close as she can to make room for Jason— though that’s not too hard with how large Bruce’s bed is. Jason shuffles hesitantly, tucking his head under Cass’s chin and allowing himself to be hugged by her, whilst hugging big bird in his arms.

She won’t be cuddled tonight, but she’s always willing to repay what the others have given her.

“G’night, love you.” He whispers to her, nuzzling further against her in search of comfort.

“Love you too.” She murmurs back, a smile etched on her face as she drifts off.

After hearing a few doors and very quiet talking, Duke decides to get up from his bed of misery.

He had tried making it more comfortable over the time he’s been here, but sometimes nothing would shake the feeling of homesickness he still felt.

Plus, that fuzzy feeling— regression, he reminds himself— keeps making it hard to do anything but lay down and cry in his own sadness, curled up with his all too cold blankets and in want of a hug.

But it’s late, everyone is probably settled back down for the night and— and he couldn’t just bother anyone for a hug anyway. He’s new to this family, the dynamic, and he just.. he didn’t slide in perfectly like a puzzle piece yet.

Sure, he was close with them and he talked to them like family, but everything was still new and he continued to find out more things. Not only about them, but himself too.

And right now, he just feels small, tired, and homesick.

Though.. Tim did tell him that if he ever felt in need of a hug, no matter the time, Bruce will always be willing to give one to him— Perks of being the new kid, Bruce couldn’t really get angry with you, Dick added. And Bruce did give some good hugs.

It wouldn’t hurt to try.

He picks himself off the bed and goes down to the end of the hall to Bruce’s door. He can hear Bruce snoring on the other side, the sound of the sheets rustling every now and then. Maybe Bruce was just an active sleeper.

He opens the door and…

Pretty much everyone is already in the bed, like a secured spot dedicated to each and every one of them. Ouch.

His bottom lip begins to wobble as his eyes well with tears. It’s not that serious, really, but seeing all the others so adjusted and comfortable to do this like it’s a routine, meanwhile he still feels like he’s intruding on everything.. It’s isolating, to say the least.

He doesn’t know how long he stands there, staring at the absolute cozy and familial scene in front of him, watching like an outsider, like it’s a paused screen.

Dick hears the door to Bruce’s door open for the umpteenth time tonight, but he never hears it close. 

Odd.

He clicks off his phone, peeking his head out quietly to investigate and Duke is standing at Bruce’s door, teary eyed, fidgeting with the frayed hoodie strings.

Alarms go off in his head immediately. Duke never seeks out Bruce in the middle of the night like this, and he certainly has never seen Duke come to anyone crying, so something must’ve happened.

He walks over, his steps unintentionally quiet until he purposefully makes a floorboard creak under his weight. Duke jumps at the noise and stares wide at Dick.

“Hey, what’s wrong? Did something happen?” Dick whispers, bending over a little to get more eye-to-eye with Duke, reaching over to pull the bedroom door nearly closed to block the sound of them talking.

Duke glances between Dick and inside the room through the small crack, biting on his lip before shaking his head, wiping his tears away with the sleeve of his hoodie. “‘M fine.” He says wetly with a sniffle. Very convincing.

“Duke, if something is wrong, you can let me or anyone one of us know. We won’t judge you or tell another person.” He assures, trying so hard to get concern across and not worry and panic in his expressions.

Duke hesitates, “I’m jus’ not feeling good. Sad.” He says, his bottom lip quivering as more tears well up. “Jus’ wanna hug.” He says in such a pitiful way, Dick thinks his heart just got torn then ripped out of his chest.

“Oh, lightning bug, I’d be more than willing to give you a hug— any of us would be.” He says, opening his arms for Duke to crash into, to which he promptly does. Tears soak through Dick’s shirt, though he doesn’t really care at the moment because his baby brother is sad, and he can’t have that.

“Did you want a hug from Bruce?” Dick asks after a few beats, he needs to figure out why the kid was just standing there. Duke nods against his chest. “Okay, so why didn’t you go in and get one, bug?” Duke hesitates again, holding Dick tighter.

“Didn’t feel right. Everybody is asleep ‘n cozy and.. I’d just be bothering them.” Duke says, muffled against Dick’s chest. “It’s scary being the new kid.” He says, moving his head to look up at Dick with a nervous look and tears steadily streaming down his eyes.

“Duke.. bud, I know it’s scary. You could never bother us though, especially if you’re upset.” Dick says with a frown, sorrow filling his voice as he runs a hand over Duke’s head comfortingly. “How about we go in there together? If you feel uncomfortable then you can leave or hug me tighter, how does that sound?”

A small and shaky— but still!— smile breaks onto Duke's face, making Dick smile back. The two walk over next to the side Damian rests on, seeing as the other was quite packed. Dick shuffles under the covers, Damian snuffles for a few moments, both Dick and Duke freeze until he flips over and nuzzles against Dick, who just combs his fingers through his hair.

Duke shifts on his feet for a few moments, then slowly climbs next to Dick, adjusting himself comfortably under the blankets and curling around Dick, who runs a hand up and down his back.

Within moments, Dick is the only one awake, smiling to himself as he looks over all of his siblings and his dad bundled together in peace. A giddy feeling fills his chest, a childish glee tugging at his mind. He holds Damian and Duke closer as he closes his eyes, happy to be sleeping surrounded by warmth and love.

Alfred checked all of the kids' rooms after nobody showed up in the midst of his cooking— let alone once it was done. No footsteps, no laughter, no tired groans from the ones who stayed up all night.

It was suspicious.

Nevertheless, he carried onwards to Bruce’s room, opening the door quietly, ready to start the daily routine of many years, until he saw Bruce already awake, surrounded by a pile of sleeping children.

“Good morning, sir.” Alfred whispers, a smile tugging at his lips at the sight.

Bruce huffs a breath in reply as he tries to sit upwards, shushing Jason when he whines at the subtlest movements or sounds, petting down his hair.

“I believe you might be stuck on the bed for the day, Master Bruce.” He says above the children, careful not to disturb any of them. Bruce chuckles quietly, “I guess I am. Not the worst situation to be stuck in though.” He says fondly, his eyes full of admiration and love for all his kids.

“Definitely not the worst.” He agrees, moving towards the bed to readjust Bruce’s pillow, seeing as the man couldn’t really move to do it himself.

Stepping away to leave the room, he pauses at the door. “I’ll come back with breakfast, perhaps a bedroom picnic is in order.” Alfred says, a twinkle of happiness shining brightly in his eyes as he leaves.

It may be Bruce’s bedroom, but the bed certainly does not hold one owner.

[felidacy]

Rambles and small ideas for a Batfamily Bloodborne AU

(It is not that cohesive I am sorry and I was forced to make some lore changes. Especially with how it begins. Don't beat me up about it.)

Gotham gets enveloped by a dark shroud that covers the whole city and makes it near imperishable, let alone letting people pass through. The city is forever shrouded in a dark loom with merely a everlasting full moon shining upon them. With no sun and the isolation, it soon takes a tool on the people. They grow sickly and depressed, if not that they become near deranged and highly irritable. Crime rates in the already vicious city steadily increase.

There is a sudden shift then - for the worse. A blood moon occurs and people begin to change. Their bodies twist, grow and even rot away. Meanwhile their humanity seems to decrease. A few attempt to research the phenomenon and hold them captive in facilities like Arkham Asylum or Blackgate Prison, however those are halted when the victims fully cease being humans and transform into eldritch monsters that lash out when the old blood gets overused by the Healing Church. A mass outbreak occurs and the monsters roam the city from then on.

Tim Drake is still in the position of the CEO Wayne Enterprise after the mysterious disappearance of the Gotham Prince (Bruce Wayne) and openly funding doctors and scholars in his tower to research their Gotham phenomenon and the monsters. He takes over the Role of Provost Willem and does not shy away from finding out the truth by any means necessary. He isolates himself because of his hunger for knowledge and shuts people out.

Researchers of his discover the tombs/Labyrinth and the usage of the old blood when coming across Ebrietas, some desperately trying to change his opinion and use blood healing to attain a new beginning. Tim is forced into a position where he needs to give up on his constant desire of evolution and progress, which goes against his nature, for the sake of the people and instead how far he can go sacrificing himself in order to attain knowledge that makes him look beyond the "now". His good-hearted start for the peace of humans turns into a obsession to achieve something which is beyond the capability of a mere human.

Damian has been put in a dire position, a child that hears and dreams of the voices of those beyond that nobody else can comprehend. With his artistic skills he puts down the words after transcribing them, he holds the Role of Runesmith Caryll. He desperately attempts to hold on to sanity as he hides himself away from all prying eyes despite the praise of those around him. He only ever hears the words of the Great Ones now.

Two people Tim trusted most "betrayed" him, Tam and Cass that take on the Role of Laurence as his trusted students that end up leaving him. Cass knew that Stephanie must secretly be alive and after having grown immensely close to her not-sister-not-lover, she could not live with herself if she didn't rescue one she loved. She had lost too many already and followed Tam, along with others. Tam had noble intentions much like Cass, although Tam held more resentment for Tim. Her father was affected by a terrible illness that was since then called the Ashen Blood and even after dozens of years where he was loyal to the Wayne family he did not wish to use the old blood to heal him. He actively even discouraged her. Tam gave her goodbyes one day to never see Tim again and began the Healing Church. To her disappointment Dr. Leslie Thompkins was not one of those that followed after them and when the blood failed to heal her father, instead actively killing him, it were Tim and Leslie that got blamed. Since then Tam began desiring evolving into something greater through the use of the blood in order to bring him back. While Cass worked as a blood minister (later on white Church hunter), Tam focused later on at the work of seeking contact with the Great Ones and became the leading figure of the Choir.

Leslie Thompkins suffers a cruel fate. Her loyalty to save the people and towards Tim cost her greatly and when Tim gets the epiphany that more eyes are needed to understand the Great Ones and evolve, she is one of those that get affected and turn into one of the many hundred eyed monsters roaming the tower and trapping Tim there.

The Healing Church grows in power as their influence in Gotham rises because of their special infected blood that heals those in dire need should they come to them. Gotham citizen began to practically worship the Healing Church when gods they previously believed them did not act and show mercy, others turned away out of fear and that soon enough began to rule the city. The Healing Church becomes a belief, a bloody beacon of hope in their endless night...a cult.

When the sickness of the Ashen Blood spreads the people falsely believe in The Healing Church and that they will save them. Instead the bridges connecting the lands to each other get torn down when they least expect it and watch on as the other half gets overrun by beasts and the ravaging sickness alike. To make sure nobody ever passes through the remains get bordered up. Tim remains on the other half in his Tower overlooking the raging City with a faraway gaze.

They mainly reside in the abandoned underground of Gotham and at the edge of the Bowery, planted right at the opposite site of the Wayne Tower, and gets called the Labyrinth as the layout changed under the influence of the shroud. In time the Healing Church began to change and it split into various branches, the Choir, the school of Mensis and the Hunters of the Workshop that evolve into the Church Hunters.

Jason and Dick had been getting Damian out of old Gotham when the great fire happened and they were unable to return to their left behind sibling. They desired to hid Damian from the Healing Church because of his connection to the Great Ones and there was no better hiding spot than directly under their nose. As such they've become hunters for the Church.

One faithful day Barbara after a long search discovers Damian when he is having one of his seizures, when he dreams of the Great Ones, and she desires to help him. She has been kept in the dark as she had been stuck in the Clocktower until the Healing Church came to free her, which causes her to make unwise decisions by mistakingly trusting Tam and Cass. Unknowing of what occurred with the lack of still functioning technology she was part of the School of Mensis. However upon touching the Great Ones overwhelm her mind and her sanity crumbles. Barbara holds the Role of Micolash. After she becomes aware of herself again she causes the School of Mensis to break away from the Church and just like Tim to find and use an unbiblical cord of the Great Ones.

Stephanie was one of the few that broke through the shroud even when nobody knows why she was permitted through. Trusting her idol and not-lover her ignorance of the state of matter makes her join Barbara. The use of the Cord brings blocked memories back to Stephanie as she recalls that she faked her death because of her pregnancy, just shortly before the shroud fell over Gotham. In fact she does not recall what she had done those months outside of Gotham, neither were the supposed baby was. That is when the Great Ones enlighten her when she connects to Mergo. That child was never born as she went through horrible complications early on and lost it, although there was no body. The child was not of human descent, but of a Great One. Broken apart by this knowledge the Cord pulls Stephanie, Barbara and others of the School into a nightmare state where they remain forever trapped while their physical bodies die. She is the Queen of Yharnam.

Alfred was thought to have died that night when the Great fire happened as he had been away from the Wayne Tower, yet neither with Damian in the Manor. However, as it turns out Alfred had gone to seek out Tam and Cass in hopes to change their minds. When he thought all his wards dead when the land was burning there was no other way than to stay with his last remaining: Cass. And as someone who only ever knew how to work through grief by helping others, he had become the leader of the old Hunters Workshop. He was Gehrmann. Still caught in his own grief the purpose was ripped from him again and he was left alone, a mistake. Like many he called upon the Great Ones and as such started the dream, the start of it all with a promise that needed to be fulfilled.

[cutelittleriot]

Return to origin chapter 4 part 2 Clay and Viva

The pink troll duo head back to Vivas makeshift house to catch up with each other while Clay took his brothers to talk in private.

The pink duo was having so much fun with each other. They clicked so well together it was amazing. "So I was thinking about getting more into, like, reading short stories and essays instead of full novels"Poppy says her tail swaying.

"Ooh, I love that for you" She says smiling as she goes to get more stuff for them to do. "Yeah,but, um But just to circle back real quick. I still have a million questions about what happened" Poppy says, she needs to know what exactly happened for her sister to end up here.

"I used to live at the Troll Tree. I was there when you were born.And you were so cute.

Kinda like you are now, only teensier and weensier and not as fluffy and" She says before gasping. "Do you wanna make candy necklaces that we never finish because we eat all the candy?" She asks excited. She really didn't want to bring up old memories of.....that time. She knows Poppy just wants to know but she just can't handle thinking about that time.

"Obviously!"She says excited her tail tumping against the couch. 'No, no that sounds exciting but you need to focus Poppy she is trying to redirect you, you can think about candy necklaces later' she thinks to herself.

"But, Veev, I’m just gonna need you to focus here and, and tell me everything. Why am I only learning about you now? What happened?" She needs to know.

"We got accidentally separated" Viva says using a robot like voice with a pen dispenser as it dispenses a pez that Poppy catches. "And I’ve lived here ever since. The end. Wanna do candy toe rings next?"Viva says trying to redirect again. "Accidentally separated?" Poppy asks both confused and worried for her sister. Why was she being so defensive?

*cut to Clay and the others*

"Look I'm sure you guys want an explanation as to why Viva is acting like this" He tells the group. "Yeah an explanation would be good" Branch says crossing his arms. "Viva doesn’t like to talk about it. It’s too painful for her. But she’s been here ever since the night of the great Bergen attack" Clay explains to the group. "Wait what?" Bruce says surprised. "That was twenty years ago!" Branch exclaims shocked.

Viva was humming as she was making candy necklaces seemingly not phased. "Viva, are you talking about the night the trolls escaped Bergen Town?" Poppy asked,that happened twenty years ago! Viva stops her humming for a second "Oh, yeah." She simply replies before resuming her humming

"Not everyone made it out of that tree. Some of them got trapped by Bergens. They were this close to getting eaten…" Clay explains as he reminisces it wasn't pleasant for him but it didn't effect him as bad as it did Viva. "Until Viva and some of the other trolls fought them off." He says as he remembers Viva and other trolls using their hair to whip at Bergen hands that were trying to grab them along with punching and kicking said hands thankfully it worked at deterring the bergens long enough for them to escape.

"But by then…the tunnels had collapsed,and they were cut off from the rest" Clay says as he remembers feeling scared as he saw the collapsed tunnels but thankfully Viva was there to help lead them to another way out though it took some effort.

"We travled for a bit and soon Viva found this old, abandoned Bergen golf course and transformed it into this troll utopia. We formed this little sanctuary of survivors. I added fire exits, she added her heart and soul." Clay says with a smile. It took time and effort but they made it work and now everyone is living here....mostly peacefully. There were times where people would wake up screaming from a nightmare. They couldn't party too loud in case it would alert bergens to their location but they still made it work. They also have plenty of drills for all kinds of situations,it's always good to be prepared.

"I’ve thought so many times about leaving, you know, to look for you and Dad, but it’s not safe out there" Viva says her ears lowering a bit in sadness. Countless nights she has woken up in a sweat from a nightmare it usually ended with Poppy and her dad getting eaten by a bergen or some kind of predator. She has thought about leaving and she really tried but everytime she got to the door....her feet just wouldn't let her move and she just went back to her home saddened by her own lack of courage.

"Okay. Obviously this is a lot,and you should be able to open up about this on your own time. But we’ll have plenty of time to work through this on the way to Mount Rageous" Poppy says,tail swaying impatient she knows she needs to get Branch and the bros and head to mount rageous asap,Floyd probably doesn't have much time left. Viva puts a candy necklace around Poppy's fluffy neck, normally she eats it all before she finishes making it.

"Whoa! I am not going to Mount Rageous. And neither are you, silly. You’re never gonna leave again" Viva says leaving the home and shutting the door behind her. She can't let her sister go she just cant! She was lucky to be able to survive this long and now she wants to go back out into the danger filled world again?! No way that's happening not if she can stop it.

Meanwhile Poppy just stares at Viva in concern. She has seen this behavior before....with Branch when he was gray. They both don't want to go out and just stay hidden away from the world becuase of their fears. She managed to help Branch with his fears....most of them. She can help her sister too with hers.

Clay has grabbed a bag of supplies for the road, he needs to be prepared for anything and everything that comes their way. Branch looks inside the bag impressed at how resourceful Clay has become. "Okay, guys, if we’re gonna save Floyd,we need to get going." Clay tells the group.

"Right I'll go get Poppy"Branch says getting ready to get his girlfriend when Clay gently grabs his shoulder. Branch flinches just a small bit at the touch but thankfully Ckay quickly let's go. "No, no, no, wait. Hold on.

There’s no way Viva’s gonna let her go"Clay says. He has been here with Viva for 2p years he knows her almost more than she knows herself and there is no way she is going to let Poppy go after she just reunited with her.

"What? What are you talking about Clay" Branch asks confused. Sure Viva might be a bit upset that Poppy has to go for a bit but they would come back. Of course they would come back they would want to reintroduce the putt putt trolls to pop village and trollstopia. Why would Viva not let Poppy go though?

"Like I said, she’s got some stuff going on, man.

If we don’t wanna get trapped, we should sneak out now" Clay says whispering but it seems that Viva and the other trolls knew what he was going to do anyways as they have turned on the lights and shut the door trapping Rhonda behind it who paws at the door.

"Oh,Hey Viva! What's up girl?" Clay asks as if he wasn't just planning to leave. She along with other putt putt trolls look at him with firm look making sure he doesn't leave this place. Poppy who had managed to leave the housed finally makes it to the group. "Viva! What are you doing?" Poppy asks.

"You’re not leaving here no matter what, because......because it’s just not safe out there. You’re welcome." She says crossing jer arms her tone firm and final. "Wait, is this about the Bergens? Because they stopped trying to eat us. That’s all in the past" Poppy explains. She can't believe she frogot to mention that to her! Maybe now she will listen.

"Yeah, right.That’s hilarious, Poppy. I’m laughing really hard."Viva says angry. Friend with the bergens? Yeah right as if they would be friends with the very creatures that held them captive in a cage and ate them once a year. She knows they did it only to feel happiness but still that doesn't excuse them! Poppy doesn't understand what horrors Viva saw during trollstice as she was a few years younger than Viva. Viva has witnessed and heard the horrors and screams of trolls during trollstice,Poppy never has. Poppy has never felt the fear of wondering if she will be eaten that year or will live to see another day.

"I’m serious Viva,Bridget, my best friend I was telling you about,she’s a Bergen. Look, Bridget and I do a million fun things together. We talk and we play games and we sing songs. And make up these really bad dances.It’s a lot like....well actually.....it’s a lot like what you and I have been doing. The world’s a lot different than it used to be."Poppy says showing Viva her scrapbook of her and Brudget doing fun stuff together much to Vivas shock and confusion. Just what happened for the trolls to make peace with the bergens?!

Maybe Viva needs a second opinion from someone else. Someone who has gone through what she went through. Branch knows he is the best troll for the job,him and Viva have alot in common.

"Viva, look, I used to be just like you. I built a bunker,and I lived in it for years because I knew it was safe.And, sure, it kept me alive.

And I never had to wear pants,but I was living without pants.Does that make sense?"Branch says hoping this is getting through to the blond haired troll. Also he hates wearing pants around his bunker even more now cause of his tail,pants are more restricting even when he has tried to make them as comfortable as possible.

"Well I feel judged" Tiny Diamond says pulling back at the baby sling. "You don’t understand Poppy.I just got my sister back.I’m not gonna lose you. For anything" Viva says holding the scrapbook close. She can't lose Poppy....not again she isn't sure if she can handle it. She has nearly gone grey at times during the early months living here thinking her baby sister didn't make it.

They then hear the sounds of the chains being moved and the door opening. Turning around she sees....the outside world. "Clay?" Viva asks in confusion. "I’m sorry, Viva, but we have to leave. I don’t wanna lose my brother either" Ckay tell her. He hopes she will understand maybe not right this minute....but she will later on. Becuase he knows that if this happened to Poppy Viva would leave to go rescue Poppy.

"Cmon guys let's move!" Clay says as he jumps down and the others begin to head out. "No. No, Poppy, wait!"Viva says desperate as she follows but the moment she steps past that yellow line she freezes in fear with a gasp and quickly backs away into the golf course. 'Cmon stupid legs move!' Viva mentally screams to herself. Why is it that EVERY. TIME. SHE GETS TO THIS STUPID.LINE SHE.FREEZES.UP! Her sister is leaving and she can't even follow her becuase of her fear. Even Branch who she has alot in common with could conquer his fear why couldn't she?!

"Poppy, please!I want you to stay!" She begs her. She can't bear to see her sister leave after just reuniting with her. Poppy turns back her ears drooping and her tail low in sadness. She sees how Viva feels about leaving this place. She can see that Viva wants to leave she really does but just like with Branch she has a blockage that is preventing her from doing so.

"Viva, I can’t do that. But you can come with us. And I know you think it’s risky,and maybe it is, but it’ll be worth it. Family’s always worth it" Poppy offers Viva her paw. She hopes this will work though she highly doubts it would. Branch watches on in sadness, he felt the same way not too long ago. He knows coaxing won't work. This has to be something Viva has to do herself.

Viva looks at Poppys paw she wants to take it. She wants to take it so badly but.....she can't she just can't. "No, no, no, I can’t. I'm sorry Poppy I just can't." Viva says handing Poppy back the scrapbook and closing the door.

Poppy watches in sadness as this happens. He hopes after this whole rescue mission of over and done with and they come back Poppy will be able to help Viva conquer her fear together. Still she lays the scrapbook down in case Viva ever wants to look through it again.

Branch puts a paw on her back to soothe her as if telling her 'hey its alright you tried' they both look at each other and smile before heading back inside Rhonda and they take off ready to rescue Floyd.

[dairy-farmer]

idk if this is too niche?? but I loved that thread abt Bruce mistaking Tim for Selina at the masquerade party as well as your feel like a brand new person fic....

do you have any more ideas for Bruce fucking Tim in a case of mistaken identities? Tim as a mysterious sexy woman or Tim as a street rat, little boy that needs to be disciplined. Or anything else honestly

your writing is so perfect thanks for sharing!!!

(good luck with school, I'm so tired from just day one of the new year lol)

it's definitely not too niche!!!! mistake identity/identity porn is one of my most favorite things!!!!

i love bruce accidentally fucking tim because its too dark, mistaking him for someone else from behind, or tim being undercover and bruce not knowing.

i once read this fic that i haven't been able to find since where bruce stumbles to his bedroom and sees who he think i selina asleep in his bed. he's tired, basically half asleep but horny enough to jack off against "her" back and spill his cum onto "her" ass only for "her" to turn over and it turn out that its tim much to bruce's horror.

another thing i really like is tim being bent over doing something and bruce coming up and doing something absolutely scummy that he'd do to selina like slapping her ass or rubbing a half chub into her backside only for tim to shoot up and they both stare at each other with equal parts horror and judgment though that's more of a comedyesque scene.

BUT the one i really really like is the idea of tim being undercover. as a prostitute, a stripper, an excort, a show girl. just something that involves getting bruce's pants uncomfortably tight until he makes a move and tim is obviously going to keep character so he goes along with it!!!

that scenario i especially like because it sets up a situation where one of them knows they fucked but the other didn't. in the twitter thread all tim knows about his mysterious accoster was that he gave him a great, albeit hasty and rough time.

identity porn really is one of my all time faves even though i don't have much fully developed ideas aside from maybe that twitter thread 😭😭😭!

thank you so much for your well wishes!! they mean a lot❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️!!!!

[nev3rfound]

option two : b.b

after nightmares continue to haunt his nights, bucky knows there’s one person left who could potentially provide some form of comfort, but is she still willing to see him after all this time? (1.5k)

masterlist / permanent taglist / etsy shop - requests open!

5k giveaway celebration 

warnings: angsty, sad bucky, minor spoilers for ep1 of tfatws  requested: nope, just something i’ve been thinking about since ep1 of tfatws

(everything on my blog is my own writing. if it is shared on another page or website without being credited, it has not been approved to be shared by me. all rights reserved.)

It felt real, as if he were back there holding the gun with no remorse.

Cold sweat covers Bucky’s body as he pants heavily, feeling the cool tags against his exposed chest rising and falling with his deep breaths that refuse to calm down.

He knew it wasn’t real, it was all in his head. But he knew it happened, even if it was many years ago, he still held the gun in his hand and pulled the trigger.

“It’s not real.” Bucky mutters to himself, glancing up to see the TV silently blaring a football game that he has no interest in, but it proves as a worthy distraction for the time being. “It’s not real.”

Remaining seated on the wooden floorboards with a blanket draped over his lap, Bucky glances over to his phone knowing there are two possible options ahead of him.

A sigh ghosts his lips as he stares at the contact list consisting of five names, only one having been used in the last week, well, month.

“James, you’ve got less than ten contacts in this phone and I’m the only person you’ve called all week.” Doctor Raynor sighs once more as she reaches for her notebook, not caring about the look of disdain crossing Bucky’s expression.

“It’s not like I’ve got anyone else to call.” Bucky shrugs it off, hearing her pen pause on the paper.

“Well, you’ve been avoiding messages from Sam for a start,”

“He doesn’t count.” Bucky remarks, hearing another quieter sigh leave her lips.

“Okay, then when was the last time you spoke to her, huh?” She counters, noticing his tense form relax at the mention of you. “Come on, James. If you want to help yourself, you have to keep in touch with those who still care about you.”

“I don’t even know if she does anymore, Doc.” Bucky admits, trying to hold back the sadness in his tone as Raynor closes her notebook.

“You have to try, James.” She reminds him. “Otherwise you’ll never know.”

Swallowing his pride, Bucky presses on the contact and listens as the number rings out. He’s counted the rings endlessly, knowing the hesitation there would be at the other end of the call.

“Hello?” He holds back the desperation clinging to his throat upon hearing someone answer, a loud yawn echoing through the line.

“Bucky?”

“Yeah,” Bucky lowers his head into his metal hand, even if it’s a different arm, it’s still part of the same tormented history. “I, could you come over?” A whisper leaves his lips as silence protrudes. “P,please?”

His ears perk up at the sound of sheets ruffling. “I’ll be there in twenty.”

Before Bucky can say his thanks, the line goes dead and the realisation sinks in; he’s going to see you again.

*

Bucky listens closely, hearing you outside of his apartment. He can hear you knock once softly, and a second time with more confidence.

He knows he should hold back a moment and pretend he hasn’t been hovering beside the front door since you hung up a mere twenty minutes ago, but he can’t help himself.

Unlocking the several locks covering the door, Bucky opens it a sliver, allowing you to slip in.

Keeping your head down, your focus remains on your feet as Bucky closes his front door before turning to you.

“I, I didn’t think you’d come.” Bucky admits quietly, afraid to hear what you have to say in response.

“Well,” You start, now lifting your head up to see him and your sentence falters in your mouth. You can’t deny that he looks worse than you envisioned, even during those late nights and early mornings when he woke up screaming in your arms, he’d never looked so grief-stricken like this.

“Yeah,” Bucky breathes out, following your gaze to his tired eyes, scratches covering his arm from attempting to claw it off in his sleep as sweat still clings to his chest. “it’s not great.”

You scoff under your breath as you follow Bucky through to his small kitchen where he pours you both glasses of water. “That is clearly an understatement.” Accepting the glass, you take the moment to reflect whilst he’s occupied. “How long has this been happening?”

Pausing at the sink, Bucky stares down into his glass of water, remembering the countless nights they attempted to drown him or try shock therapy. And how every time it didn’t work, he remembered it all.

“A while.” He mutters, his grip tightening on the kitchen ledge as his metal hand clenches around the glass, shattering it into the sink.

“James,” You call out, slowly rising from your seat and moving toward him. “I’m right here, you’re here too, alright?”

Standing beside him, you reach out for his hand, easing his grip on the counter until he lets go.

“You’re right here.” You repeat to him as his eyes remain tightly closed, his jaw locked and left hand still clenching the broken glass. “You can let go, Bucky.” The words leave your lips in a whisper as the remainder of the glass drops into the sink, and Bucky turns his body to face yours.

“It wasn’t real,” Bucky tells you weakly. “please tell me it wasn’t real.”

Without thinking twice, you lift your hand to rest it against his cheek and Bucky instantly cradles it with his flesh hand, keeping it in place.

“It wasn’t real, James.” You confidently state as he moves your hand and presses a gentle kiss against it. “Why didn’t you call me sooner?” You sigh as you both remain in the dimly lit kitchen, the only movement from Bucky as he turns the tap off.

“Nothings been the same since Steve,” He can’t help but trail off, knowing he doesn’t have to explain himself around you. “and I just couldn’t face it, not with all that history.”

Stepping backwards, you let your hand slip from his as you lean against the counter, crossing your arms. “But what about the rest of us, Bucky? You just stopped answering, after everything we’ve been through.” You try to keep your voice low, remain calm, but after all this time, it’s difficult to not let your feelings get in the way. “I’ve lost all of you. Sam, Wanda, Peter, Clint, Bruce, Thor and now you too.”

“I’m sorry, doll,” Bucky breathes out. “I never meant to hurt you, I, I’ve been making amends.”

Walking past you, Bucky rummages through his bedside table, revealing the well-worn notebook.

“Was that?” You don’t have to finish your question before Bucky nods, flipping through the pages to a series of names scribbled down.

“These are all the people I wronged or hurt or who were affected by the Winter Soldier.” Bucky explains, holding the book out to you.

He watches closely as your eyes scan over the names, flipping through the pages seeing those crossed out or circled or left untouched. Until you see the last name on the list, yours.

“Y/n, I’m truly sorry for leaving you, for causing you any pain.” Bucky begins to explain as you close the notebook, placing it back on the counter out of sight. “I know I can’t take back what I’ve done, for disappearing for months without warning, but I,” Unable to fight his emotions, Bucky cracks.

You reach out as he curls up to the ground, quiet sobs wracking through his body as you hold him close.

“It’s okay,” You shush him as you fall to a sitting position, Bucky curling his head into your lap once more. “we can talk about this in the morning, okay?”

“You’re not leaving, are you?” Bucky tenses beneath you before sparing you a glance, allowing you to see those blue eyes, the ones you’ve missed falling asleep beside and waking up to, those same blue eyes that hold so much pain you can’t comprehend.

“No,” You whisper, running your fingers through his short hair, missing how the long ends used to feel against your face in the mornings. “I promise, I won’t go.” You lean back against the cabinets as Bucky begins to relax beneath you, his metal arm outstretched whilst his flesh arm remains around your waist, hugging you close.

“This is real, isn’t it?” Bucky sadly asks, looking out toward the dark hallway of his apartment, seeing nothing besides the faint glare of the tv. “I, I’m not dreaming this again am I?”

The thought breaks your heart as you rest your hand on his shoulder, running your fingers along the faint scar that remains etched into his skin.

“It’s real, Bucky.” You tell him, trying to disguise the cry that is lodged in your throat. “And I’m not going anywhere.”

Despite your words of comfort, Bucky closes his eyes uneasily, wondering when he’ll wake up from this dream to the painful reality he truly lives in.

t a g l i s t (thank you for the support!) link in my bio and at the top of this piece to add yourself☺️(if your user isn’t tagged, it’s because nothing comes up sorry!)

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[jobean12-blog]

Tag! You’re It!

Pairing: Bucky x reader 

Word Count: 1,220

Summary: You convince Tony to let the team play Laser Tag and you get paired with Bucky on team Cap. 

Author’s Note: This is for the @redhead-wine-and-literature-club Love in Bloom Challenge and day 28: Cornflower which means good-luck charm. I didn’t use the actual flower this time but the meaning is here. Also, laser tag is so fun, I’d love to be on Bucky’s team! Thank you all so much for reading! Much love always! ❤❤❤ Divider by the lovely @imerdwarf

Warnings: lots of flirting, fun and fluffs! :) 

NO SPOILERS HERE!!!

Thank you so much to @jamesbrns for this awesome gif :) Just imagine it’s a laser tag gun instead of a real one haha :D 

Love in Bloom Masterlist

“Why do you get to pick who’s on our team punk? Don’t Sam and I get a say in this? Bucky grumbles.

Steve sets his hands at his hips and purses his lips. “I didn’t say you couldn’t help Buck and if there is someone you want on our team so badly just say it! You’ve been a pain this whole time.”

Bucky now smiles, shooting Sam a sideways glance before blurting out your name.

“I KNEW IT!” Sam shouts triumphantly. “Alright Steve, they are definitely paired up. You’re stuck with me.”

Bucky doesn’t bother to hide his happiness at being your teammate, walking off with extra pep in his step as Sam and Steve’s laughter follow him.

The next day everyone is seated in the common room and you’re bouncing in your seat with excitement. Tony stands in the center and pulls up his holographic screen.

“Alright Avengers. We’ve got my team here on the right and Steve’s team on your left,” Tony states. “You have the rest of the morning to figure out your game plan and we’ll meet at the facility at 2. I rented the entire building so we can do what we want.” He throws everyone a grin before hailing his team and walking off.

“Ok gang,” Steve starts. “I think it’s best if we pair off, this way no one is left alone or unguarded.”

Everyone nods their heads in agreement. You’re seated across from Bucky and you catch him staring. You throw him a wide smile before giving your attention back to Steve.

Steve rattles off the pairs and when he says that you’re with Bucky you jump out of your seat and plop yourself next to him.

“I was hoping you’d be my partner,” you whisper.

Bucky can’t stop his surprised look but it quickly turns in to a smile when you continue.

“I know you’re the best shot so you’re going to be really good at this.”

He leans in close to your ear. “That’s not the only thing I’m good at doll face.”

You turn your head at his remark, your face now only inches from his.

“Is that so?” you ask with a smirk.

Before you can ask him to elaborate, Steve let’s out a dramatic sigh. “If you two are going to flirt the whole time then maybe you shouldn’t be partners. I don’t want anyone getting killed because they couldn’t keep their head in the game.”

Both you and Bucky scoff, dismissing him with a wave.

“Whatever punk. We got this,” Bucky assures him, sending you a wink.

“And it’s laser tag Steve. No one is getting killed,” you add with a roll of your eyes.

Steve’s hands are on his hips once again and he glares at you. “No one ‘dies’ on my watch and I want to win this thing.”

With that he storms off, yelling, “I’ll see you all at 2. Don’t be late!”

When you get to the building everyone starts putting on their gear. You’re struggling with the buckles on your vest when Bucky saunters over.

“Need some help doll?” he asks.

You look him up and down, enjoying how his dark jeans and black tee shirt fit tightly across his body.

“That would be great Bucky, thanks,” you reply.

He moves closer and his chest brushes yours as he reaches behind you to secure the vest. You inhale his scent and try to keep your hands at your sides, the need to touch him hard to resist.

When he pulls away and sees the heat in your gaze he licks his lips.

“Ready to play baby doll?” His tone is laced with promise and it takes you a moment to pull your head out of your lewd thoughts.

“So ready,” you purr.

The game gets underway and you and Bucky sneak off to find a hideout.

“If we hide ourselves well enough I can pick people off while you keep watch,” he explains as you walk through the field.

You trip and curse, following it with more curses for the noise you made. Bucky turns around and grabs your hand, holding it tightly as you creep along a darkened wall.

He silently motions for you to hide behind a large wooden box. You get into position and almost let out a loud gasp when he covers your body with his and presses against you.

“Just stay low and keep a look out,” he whispers, his breath fanning over your neck.

You hold back a shiver, needing to stay focused on the task at hand. As the minutes pass it becomes increasingly difficult to do so as Bucky continuously swivels and his body rubs along yours. He’s so close you can feel his muscles flex with every movement.

Bucky tags Tony and then Bruce and you give him a high five. A few minutes later you catch some movement out of the corner of your eye and discover Peter slowly inching closer. You elbow Bucky and he turns just as you tag Peter on his vest.

Bucky continues to tag people from your secret spot and you start to get distracted by his closeness. He unexpectedly bends down and presses you into the wall.

“Don’t move,” he warns.

You hear the scuffle of boots approaching and you stop breathing. Even under the low lighting you can see Bucky’s eyes drift to your lips. The sound of footsteps gets closer before they eventually start to recede and you realize whoever it was is gone.

“You must be my good luck charm,” he says sweetly before inching up and checking the area. “It’s safe,” he says, pulling you up by the hand.

In the next hour, the game really gets going and only you, Bucky, and Nat are left.

“We’re going to have to team if we want to tag her,” Bucky whispers. “Nat is an expert.”

You acknowledge the truth in his words with a silent nod. You both lay low, waiting in the stillness for any clue to her whereabouts. Bucky’s hand settles at your waist and he nudges you forward. You start to move as quietly as possible and the only sound you hear is Bucky’s steady breathing.

A flash of red moves across the field and you instinctively give chase, watching Nat skillfully evade your tags. Thankfully, Bucky goes in the opposite direction and heads her off, tagging her point blank when she rounds the corner.

You give a loud hoot and start jumping up and down. Bucky rushes over, laughing at the string of curses that leave Nat’s mouth. He picks you up and twirls you around.

“We won!!!” he shouts.

As you slide down his body you feel adrenaline rush through you and you plant your hands on his chest, grabbing his laser tag vest.

“I guess I really am your good luck charm,” you simper.

With one swift motion you haul his mouth down to yours and kiss him hard. He immediately drops his gun and circles his arms around you, sliding his hand to the back of your neck. You’re not sure how long your lip locked but when you finally come up for air you’ve gained an audience.

“Now I see why he wanted her on his team so badly,” Steve chimes with a smile.

@addikted-2-dopamine @book-dragon-13 @drabblewithfrannybarnes @eurynome827 @hiddles-rose @jhangelface0523 @jewels2876 @jeremyrennerfanxxxx123 @la-cey @lookiamtrying @loricameback @lorilane33 @loveitorleaveit20 @lizette50 @ironmansuucks @mardema @meetmeatyourworst @moonlitskinandcrimsonribbons @marvelgirl7 @moonlacebeam @nano--raptor @pinkdiamond1016 @randomfandompenguin @starlightcrystalline @white-wolf1940​

[itsapeterthing]

Secrets (Five) || Bucky Barnes

pairing: bucky barnes x reader

summary: as time goes on at the compound, you begin to come to terms with your new abilities and your relationship with your husband, bucky

a/n: i'm so sorry for the delay, but i hope you enjoy!!

word count: 2.5k

warnings: pregnancy if you squint

Prologue, One, Two, Three, Four

masterlist || request || taglist

"You might have to get a matching set of earrings, but I don’t think it’s too shabby.” Nat said, leaning back in her seat.

Playing with the newly gifted bracelet on your wrist, you chuckled.

“I guess it could be worse.” You joked. “And this is supposed to stop me from... you know... turning the whole room to ice?”

“Not stop-” Bruce corrected you. “Control. We’re never going to be able to... reverse... what happened, but at least this will help you control it.”

Nodding your head along with what he was saying, your eyes strayed from your wrist to your husband standing against the far wall of the lab, his arms crossed and eyes focused on you. 

The two of you hadn’t spoken to each other since the first day you had woken up from being captured and he had held you in his arms. You were still struggling with coming to terms with who your husband was and even who you were. Knowing you needed your space, he had respected your wishes, keeping a painful distance from you for the past three days since you had woken up in the icy room of the Compound.

His eyes snapping away from yours, they landed on an article of clothing laying on one of the countertops in the lab.

“What’s that?” He asked, speaking up for the first time that day.

You, Bruce, Nat and Sam glanced at one another before your eyes landed on the suit on the table. Crossing your arms, you focused your attention at the ground.

“A suit.” Bruce clarified.

“Yeah, no shit.” Bucky said, picking up the cloth. “For who?”

“For me.” You said, speaking up, still not meeting your husband’s eyes.

An awkward silence hung in the room for a brief moment after your confession, before Bucky found his voice again.

“Can I talk to you outside?” He asked, pushing open the doors of the lab.

Nodding, you said nothing before following close behind your husband into the hallway of the Compound. When situated outside, you looked up at him.

“What?” You asked.

“What?” He repeated. “Don’t ‘what’ me, Y/n. Since when did you start having them make you a suit? I thought once this was all over you wanted to go home.”

Rolling your eyes, you crossed your arms.

“I never said that.” You said. “You just assumed that. I mean, what do you want me to do, Buck? I have abilities that other people don’t have. I can’t just go home after this and pretend like this isn’t a part of me anymore- like this never happened. I have these abilities and I should use them for good. I have to. You don't have to worry about me. I made this choice for myself.”

Staring at the resolve written all over your face, Bucky laced his fingers into his hair, tugging the short strands.

He understood what you were saying. He understood that you felt a responsibility to do good, but he thought of himself too- how he fell into the position he was in now.

He didn’t make the choice to be an Avenger. The choice had been made for him the moment he fell from that train and was taken into the hands of Hydra. He wanted better for you than a life you hadn’t chosen. He wanted better for you than a life where you were constantly risking your life and wondering if you would live to see another day.

He wanted more for himself than losing the love of his life because of a sense of duty.

“You don’t choose to go into stuff like this, Y/n.” Bucky said, unlacing his fingers from his hair and throwing his arms in the air. “You’re forced. You can still get out of this, doll. Don’t stay because you feel like you have to- you don’t owe anybody anything. You have the choice to go home and forget about all this and that’s what most people like me wish for.”

“Fine, you know what?” You said, throwing your hands up in the air. “You’re right. I don’t have a choice. I was forced into this shit because I didn’t know who I married and some guy tried to kill me because of it. Don’t stand there and act like you know what’s good for me when you’re the whole reason I’m in this mess.”

Slipping the bracelet off of your wrist, you held it between your fingers and watched as the floor below you began to turn to ice at your feet and frost started to coat the bracelet in your hand.

“Look at this, Buck.” You said, waving the bracelet. “Look at this! You think I can just go home and pretend like I wouldn’t turn you into a fucking popsicle if this was off for more than two minutes? I can’t pretend like this isn’t happening to me and if I have the chance to do something good with it then I will.”

Watching Bucky’s eyes soften as he stared at you, you slipped the bracelet back onto your wrist, the ice melting away with it. Shaking his head, you watched as the angry demeanor that he had been portraying seconds ago faded away as his shoulders relaxed and his hands went still at his sides.

“I just want what’s best for you.”

The way his voice cracked as the words slipped out of his mouth and he could barely meet your eyes made your heart tug in your chest. You knew he didn’t mean you any harm. You knew even after everything that he was just looking out for you, but you also knew that he had a clouded sense of what was right and wrong for you.

Relaxing your shoulders, you slowly walked over to your husband, resting your hand on his bicep.

“I know that, Buck.” You said softly, urging him to meet your eyes. “But when are you going to realize that you don’t know what that is?”

-

Looking into the room through the window of the door, you fiddled with the bracelet on your wrist, all the thoughts of what could go wrong running through your mind. Feeling the cold touch of vibranium wrap around your wrist, you stopped your fidgeting.

“Stop worrying, Y/n.” Bucky said from beside you. “Everything is gonna be fine.”

“What? I’m not worried.” You lied.

“You’re joking, right?” He asked, a hint of a smile gracing his face and what you would even call a chuckle slipping from his mouth. “At our wedding you twisted your engagement ring the whole time and remember when you took those pregnancy tests for Grant? You spent the whole time messing with that stupid bracelet on your wrist I was worried your skin was gonna turn red. Even that little- God what is it called? That thing Becca made for Mother’s Day last year?”

“Are you talking about that macaroni necklace?” You couldn’t help but laugh.

“Yes!” Bucky exclaimed, snapping his fingers when you finally said the name. “That thing. You were messing with that thing so much that when you saw me hit my head on the cabinet door you snapped the pasta right in your hand.”

You knew exactly what he was talking about.

Your kitchen sink had stopped working properly that day and rather than call an actual plumber, your husband had insisted that he knew what he was doing and he would be able to fix it just fine. You watched as he worked, his head inside the cabinet as you leaned against the countertop fiddling with your newly gifted necklace from your daughter around your neck.

When water began to shoot out of the pipe, your husband cursing as water blasted his face, he attempted to pull away, knocking his head on the doorframe on the way out. As soon as you heard his shout, you felt the piece of macaroni shatter in your fist as you squeezed it tightly.

“Oh God, Buck are you okay?” You asked.

“God damn it!” He cursed again. “This hurts like shit.”

“Are you bleeding?” You asked, now standing in the puddle of water that coated the floor.

Pulling his hand away from the spot on his head that he had just hit and not seeing any blood, he shook his head.

Breathing a sigh of relief knowing that you wouldn’t have to be making a trip to the hospital that day, you took in the scene around you as the water continued to spray out of the pipe flooding the floor of your kitchen.

“Buck?”

“Yeah?” He asked looking up at you, you just now noticing the droplets of water coating his eyelashes and face.

“Can we call a plumber now?”

Looking around him and the puddle of water he was sitting in, he sighed, giving in.

“Yes, doll.”

“You know, it’s kind of funny thinking about it now.” You chuckled to yourself. “I was worried about you hitting your head on a cabinet and you’ve survived shit that only happens in movies.”

As Bucky laughed along with what you had just said, you stared up at your husband, catching the smile that had crossed his face for the first time in a week, noticing now the dark circles under his eyes and the scruff that hadn’t been shaved in days. He looked exhausted, as if he hadn’t slept since the last time you laid in bed beside him. You hadn’t checked the mirror yet, but you could guess that you didn’t look much different.

“I guess I am kind of worried.” You confessed.

“I know, but there’s nothing to worry about. I promise.”

For the first time since you had found out about his double life, you trusted in what he said.

When you nodded your head you felt as his hand brushed along your back, resting in the curvature of your spine. With his free hand, he slowly opened the door of the room, revealing your son and Sam on the other side.

Upon hearing the door open, your son’s head darted from the table he was sitting at towards where you were standing in the doorway. As soon as his eyes landed on you, you watched as he pushed himself away from the table, the metal chair he was sitting on scraping against the floor, practically toppling over as he hopped out of it and ran into your arms.

“Oof!” You grunted as his arms wrapped around you, his face digging into your stomach. “Miss me?”

He nodded against your stomach.

“You have a great kid.” Sam said, sitting in his spot at the table your son had just been at, coffee in hand. “Your daughter too, but this one gives me a kick.”

“Yeah?” You asked chuckling and as soon as you did your son pulled away from your embrace.

“I was so scared ‘cause I thought that those guys killed you, but then Dad came back with Captain America and Black Widow and then we came here and-” Your son began rambling, throwing his arms in the air wildly. “And then yesterday Captain America let me fly-”

“You took my son flying?” Bucky asked Sam beside you.

“Depends on what you consider flying.” Sam shrugged taking another sip of coffee.

“-and then I got to play with the shield and it’s so cool, Mom!” Grant finished saying, catching his breath.

“Wow buddy that sounds... dangerous.” You said eyeing Sam while ruffling your son’s hair. “But I’m glad you had fun!”

Just then you heard the door on the far side of the room open, Natasha emerging with your daughter in her arms. The first to move was Bucky making his way over to Natasha, taking his girl into his arms and bringing her over to you.

“Hi sleepy girl.” You cooed, reaching out for your daughter who had clearly just woken up from a nap.

When your hands met her skin, however, she quickly pulled way from your touch, curling more into her father’s chest.

“Your hands are too cold, Mommy.”

Practically feeling your heart shatter in your chest, you looked up to meet Bucky’s eyes just as downcast as yours. Pulling yourself away from your daughter, you clasped your hands together, biting back the pain that you felt from her rejection.

Noticing how you began backing away, Bucky frantically took his daughter’s hand in his vibranium one, staring down at her.

“C’mon your mom’s hands aren’t that cold, right?” He asked. “What about mine. You always say my metal one is cold, right bug?”

Resting her head against his chest, she shook her head.

“Buck, it’s fine. She's right.” You eased, backing away from everyone towards the door. “Does anybody else feel hot in here? It’s really hot. I think I’m just gonna take a breather outside-”

“Y/n-” Bucky called.

“It’s okay, I’m just gonna slip outside real quick.”You said, pulling on the handle of the door and swinging it open. “I’ll be right back.”

Before anybody could protest further, you stepped into the hallway, shutting the door behind you. As you walked down the hallway, you were realizing for the first time that you didn’t recognize this place and you didn’t know where you were going. The more you thought about it, you barely recognized anything anymore and you didn’t know where you were going to go from where you were right now.

How did you end up here? How did you go from having some guy across the bar from you catch your eye to pacing down the hallways of the Avengers Compound, ice flowing through your veins? Frustrated, tired and confused, you felt a sob you didn’t even realize was there catch in your throat. Throwing your hand to your mouth, you leaned against the hallway wall, feeling tears begin to fog your vision.

“Y/n?” Bucky called, following you down the hallway. “You know Becca’s weird like that sometimes. She just woke up and was tired and cranky-”

“James, it’s fine.” You said.

After a brief pause, you heard his voice again, the tone more shaky than the last.

“Y/n...”

“Buck I said-”

“Y/n watch out!” He shouted.

Shooting away from the wall, your head darted to the big windows at the end of the hall, an unfamiliar object coming straight towards them from the outside.

Before you could even have time to discern what was happening, you watched as the glass of the large windows shattered across the hallway and heard them hit the floor, small bits nicking your skin along the way. You listened as loud beeps emitted from the device, growing quicker by the second. 

Snapping your attention back to Bucky, both of your eyes wide, the last thing you recalled was the feeling of his hands securing the back of your head and your lower back as you fell to the ground.

[ragingbookdragon]

Ma'am may I please request some ghost maker x batsis content?🤧

Maybe one where gm is being all philosophical and batsis just goes "you're weird dude" and walks away. I imagined some list A comedy when writing this but it turned out bland but meh. I'm sure you are going to make something great out of it.

You may! You know what's a great pairing? One who's all philosophical and the other who's like "this is bullshit". Enjoy! -Thorne

**********************************************************************

Her eyes drifted to the tracker, the blinking bat signaling that he was just a few more meters beyond the door. When her siblings had called and said they weren’t sure where their dad had gone, it was up to her to find him. And she did, after six devices had been eaten by some mysterious network and only a single glowing symbol remained, that of an animated ghost—somebody was going to pay for her new tech. That shit wasn’t cheap. But she had to hand it to the creator of the network—it was virtually impenetrable by any means, and she had skills akin to Oracle’s and her third brother.

She crept along the side of the wall, eyes flowing all around for traps of any kind, but nothing seemed to be out in the open. It unnerved her as she reached the door, gently waving a hand across it, awaiting a sensor to go off in her cowl signifying a hidden trap.

When no warning came, she curled her hand around the doorknob and opened the door, entering the room. Immediately she raised a hand to her eyes, turning off the detective mode. Opening her eyes, the stark white walls practically blinded her.

“Sheesh, get some color in here,” she whispered, walking up to the large desk. The space reminded her of the Batcave, just opposite of dark and creepy.

Nearing the desk, she glanced at the device in her hand, the blinking bat right there and she looked up, seeing her dad’s utility belt there. A click sounded behind her, and she spun on her heel, already whipping out her gun.

A man stood before her, dressed in a white suit with a black and white mask over his head. “Good evening.”

Her eyes narrowed. “Where’s Batman?”

“Bruce is taking a nap after being injected with a heavy cocktail of antibiotics and anesthesia.”

“Take me to him,” she demanded. “Or I’ll shoot you.”

The corner of his mouth cocked up in a smirk and he leaned against the desk. “You must be (Y/N). The oldest child.”

“Adult,” she shot back, thumbing the hammer. “And I will shoot you if you don’t take me to my dad.”

“I take it he never told you about me?”

She glared at him. “The only thing I’m interested in being told is where he is at this very moment.”

“As I said,” he shrugged. “He’s resting.” Standing up, he took a step towards her, watching carefully as the barrel of the gun followed his movement. “I’m Ghost-Maker.”

“I know the name.” (Y/N) answered. “Or the stories at least.” Gazing at him for a moment, she scrutinized their situation before sighing and shoving the gun back in its holster. “I know you’re a friendly too.”

He tipped his head side to side. “That’s debatable most days.”

Her eyes flickered to his as she stowed the device. “Where is he?”

“Up the stairs in the med bay.” Ghost-Maker did a one over on her. “I forgot that other than Red Hood, you were the only one who used lethal force. We’re alike, you and I.”

(Y/N)’s face pinched as she pulled off her cowl. “Don’t compare me and you. I don’t kill people to complete my desire of crime fighting. I take lives only if it’s absolutely necessary.”

“Please,” he murmured coolly. “You’ve killed quite a few people outside the mask.”

“Bad people,” she hissed. “Very bad people. For very good reasons.”

Ghost-Maker stared at her. “Is it not enough to fight evil for the sake of fighting evil? What about the perfection of fixing the world? Don’t you imagine a society where there is no crime?”

“What? And have mindless zombies everywhere?” she rolled her eyes. “Deviancy allows for the world and society to change. If there is no deviancy, nothing changes.”

“Ah, there’s the sociologist in you.” He crossed his arms over his chest. “You feel for humanity. The impact of doing good will come back.”

“And you don’t.” (Y/N) retorted. “Because you’re a psychopath who believes emotion is detrimental.” She waltzed over, mocking, “Is the big bad Ghost-Maker afraid of being kind to somebody? Is he afraid he’s going to turn into my dad if he believes there’s good in people?”

His smirk annoyed the hell out of her, and he leaned forward, getting nose to nose with (Y/N). “I think you’re upset that your dad views me as an equal and you a subordinate.”

“Fight me,” she growled.

“Why would I fight someone who’s like me?” he questioned. “You and I could change the world more than we could destroy it together. Think about it. With my method and your…emotion…we could change everything.”

(Y/N) cocked a brow and simply stared at him before muttering, “You’re a weird dude.” She brushed past and walked towards the stairs, leaving him confused and if he were honest, a little offended.

Ghost-Maker was quick to turn on his heel, following her up the steps. “Now wait a moment! How was any of that weird?”

“Because it’s you.”

“That makes no sense!”

“It does.”

“No, it doesn’t!”

“Dad would agree with me.”

“Well, of course Bruce would! It’s Bruce! You know what—"

[stxleslyds]

Robin Jason, a friend and ally of the Titans.

PART 1.

Last Friday I was feeling extra rage-y after the news about the Titans mini with the Titans show line-up of heroes. I still think that a) Jason shouldn’t be considered a Titan or be in the team as Red Hood and b) that him going back to wearing a bat symbol on his chest is just bad but as @randomlut said there is a possibility of that book not being set in DC’s current universe and if that’s the case then okay, I will not complain about it anymore.

But this post isn’t about that Titans book it’s about Jason’s Robin’s appearances in volume two of the New Teen Titans!

Now, this won’t be an in-depth review of those issues from a story point of view, it will be a post in which I talk about Jason’s characterization and interactions with the Titans. Maybe I will even dive a little bit into why I think that the interactions that Jason and Roy have in those issues makes the relationship that they had in New52 very out of place.

Let’s begin!

·         NTT (1984) #19

Jason as Robin appears here only in the last page of the issue. After the current team of the Titans appears to be falling apart Donna calls Jason and others to help in a mission, this team that she puts together resembles the “original” line-up with Robin, Speedy, (Kid) Flash, Aqualad and Hawk.

·         NTT (1884) #20-21

Jason appears in the Titans tower along the OG Titans, when Donna finally tells them what the mission is all about (stopping Cheshire from interrupting a meeting) she asks if they are in on the job, Jason is not only excited about being there but about Batman actually letting him come all the way to the tower. A little bit of what Jason thinks or saw in Bruce is shown when Wally says that he “didn’t think the Batman could be thrilled by anything. He is always so grim.”

Basically, what Jason says is that the Bat isn’t that bad if you get to know him and that he cares about Jason’s education outside of vigilantism. Also, Jason seems to be grateful and very receptive of the things that Bruce taught him, he regards him as a very good mentor.

After everyone decides to help, they get on their jet. Here we have a very important interaction between Jason and Donna, she is telling him how she is feeling about the attitude of the rest of the team and about how she is a little bit lost now that she is in charge of the Titans and then she asks what Robin thinks about the whole thing, Jason is obviously thrilled once more, someone as experienced as Donna is asking him for his opinion? It blows his mind away! Batman never does that, he is always following his lead and never has a say on what they do so, to him, helping the Titans is only getting better and maybe he will ask the Bat to let him join them permanently.

Because they were talking Donna wasn’t paying much attention while flying and after they barely avoid crashing the jet, she apologizes to everyone and once more looks for reassurance with Jason, this time Jason is caught off guard but after Hawk teases him about his hesitation he tells her that “everything’s okay”.

When they arrive to Switzerland (where the meeting will be held) we have Jason’s first interaction with Roy Harper and him also slowly transforming into a burrito, that boy was cold and pissed off about it!

It’s really funny to me that Roy talking about Oliver’s pervy arrows is his very first interaction with Jason, who would have thought that a mad man would later make them besties?

They all go inside a building to get warm and for a while Jason is just chilling while the other Titans are all having an existential crisis, because here is the thing, Jason is a kid, he was presumably 14 here while all the other are in their twenties. Donna is having trouble with her new position as leader of the Titans, Wally is trying to live up to Barry, Garth is grieving his love, Roy is still very uncomfortable about being on a mission that involves Cheshire and Hank is just crazy. The others are trying to complete a mission while their real-life problems loom over them and Jason is just on an adventure with cool people.

Its not much later than Cheshire attacks the Titans, she first takes on Wally because he is her biggest threat and then detonates a bomb, now here I will give a little bit of context, Cheshire does not want to kill the Titans as of now, she just wants to incapacitate them because them being there is making her own mission more complicated, all I will say is that she doesn’t truly have villainous intentions and that she has a very weak spot for Roy.

Anyway, the bomb incapacitates Garth and Roy and Cheshire also managed to shoot Wally so only Donna, Hank and Jason are left standing to capture Cheshire, but here is the thing, Hank doesn’t want to capture her, he wants to kill her.

Jason has interacted very few times with Hank so far and it has always been Hank teasing him but now as Jason is going to fight Cheshire Hank interrupts him telling him that he will do “what has to be done”. Cheshire of course wont fall easily and I think that at this very moment she is thinking that killing Hank wouldn’t be a bad idea because he is going to mess her plans up! But not to worry as she is raising her gun Jason comes in to save his ass!

Jason is not a match for Cheshire and after that she quickly subdues him. But what’s important here is two things, first Jason doesn’t want or consider the idea of killing Jade, he just wants to capture her and bring her to justice, secondly, he doesn’t even want her to kill Hank, who has been violent towards every Titan and rude to Jason every single time that he has interacted with him. What I am trying to say is that this IS Robin Jason, he doesn’t think or act the same as Red Hood will in the future, he has his opinions on what punishments killers should get but he is not there to kill anyone himself.

There is this whole page where Donna beats Hank against a tree so he stops killing, because that’s not what the Titans do, she explains that if they do that then the public (that is already quite afraid of them) will just fear them more and they don’t need that, plus she believes that he is acting that way out of grief after losing his brother, as she is saying all of this though she is putting quite a lot of pressure on his chest and that might have ended up in her actually killing Hank if Jason hasn’t been there to stop her.

Donna is obviously not having a good time and after this she says that she “has had it” and that from now on Robin should “take command” because “its his group anyway”. Oh man…its clear to the reader that Donna is not having a good time being team leader but she also misses a certain person a lot. She is obviously not seeing Jason there, she is seeing Dick, the person that she is used to take orders from but he is not there.

Jason is aware of this, he might be a kid and might not have as many problems as the other Titans as of now but he is not a fool and he doesn’t want people to see someone else when they look at him, so he confronts Donna about what she just said/did.

Jason is just great in this scene; he just doesn’t want people that he admires to treat him as if he were someone that he isn’t. Just because Dick isn’t there doesn’t mean that he (because he is Robin) can replace him, they are not the same person and they do not have the same experience. He calls out Donna on her behaviour towards him and Donna being an adult takes responsibly for her actions and understands that ultimately, she was hurting Jason’s feelings. We have a kinda wholesome moment when they hug but because this is written by Marv Wolfman and he just can’t help himself, he proceeds to write Jason as a horny teenager. What a way to ruin the moment Marv…

Back to Cheshire, she is about to kick Wally’s face in when she decides to first tell him what he has to tell the others when they wake up, which is “Cheshire remembers”.

Wally tells the Titans Cheshire’s message but none of them truly understands what it means, Hank says that he doesn’t even understand why they are alive. Donna comes to the conclusion that Cheshire might want something from them and this is where Jason gives his thoughts, he says “Doesn’t matter what she wants. We take care of her. She’s a killer.”, its clear once more than although Jason (as Robin) wouldn’t kill anyone he does feel a certain type of way about criminals and wants them to be locked up.

After yet another verbal fight between Hank and Donna the Titans take a cable car to their next location, Jason is shown as exited about the view and the whole experience once more. When they arrive, they find Faraday (the guy that called Donna for help in #19) and he explains a bit more the situation but Jason once more is having trouble staying warm so he goes to the cable car tunnel nearby, but he doesn’t go alone, Roy goes with him because his “costume wasn’t made for this kind of weather either”, in this second interaction between these two we get to see Jason’s detective skills shine.

Jason has been watching Roy and he found his reaction to Cheshire’s message quite sus. Not only is he showing his detective skills here but he also said in a previous panel this: “The Batman keeps telling me to watch people’s eyes. And every so often I notice you become awfully agitated…like something was going on you didn’t want to be part of”.  Zdarsky, hey pal, I am talking to you, look at this dude! He read Roy like an open book, this is Robin Jason, he likes being Robin and he is brilliant at it, he is methodical because he learnt from paying attention and working with Batman, so, you sir are wrong, not only did UtRH disprove your dumb narrative but so does this interaction (along all his appearances in this book).

Roy is impressed by the kid, and yeah, he calls him kid because he is a kid…Roy is visibly older than Jason as he should, do you see it Lobdell? Yeah, there is no dubious age gap between those two as you made it seem. Roy is impressed because between both of them he is the one that is most experienced, not the other way around. How did Lobdell manage to make up a whole as run where not only were Roy and Jason close in age and besties but also Jason was better at vigilantism than Roy and Roy was the one being impressed. It’s wild, wild and bad.

Back to the issue, Jason taken out of the fight quite fast once more by Cheshire and she proceeds to talk to Roy, that’s where we find out that they were lovers and that she feels weak when she is around him because he makes her feel feelings but that’s not all, she tells Roy that he is “the man that fathered my child” …Oh and now she does want to kill him. That’s where #20 ends, so let’s see what happens with Jason in #21.

In the beginning of #21 Jason is conscious once more and when he hears Cheshire’s threat, he attacks her so she can’t shoot Roy, he also says this “Sorry ‘cat’ that’s a definite no-no. Don’t you know mommy’s and daddies should never fight” I, I don’t know why he had to say it like that…the 80s were weird. While Jason is being himself Roy is thinking “Don’t be cocky kid, Jade hasn’t got a sense of humour…” but because he wants to talk to Jade, he tells Jason to go, that he will handle Cheshire and he leaves.

Roy and Jade talk, Donna and Hawk are fighting bad guys and each other and at some point, Jason joins Garth and helps him take down a couple of guys, he also tries to make conversation with him but Garth is still not talking to anybody.

Cheshire tells Roy that he will never hear about their child again and that he needs to let her do her thing and stay out of it because he doesn’t understand what’s going on, Roy doesn’t do what she asks and she “poisons” him. Donna saves a guy that Hank was trying to kill. After Cheshire leaves Roy comes to the conclusion that she wasn’t there to kill the people from the meeting or that she poisoned him, but because they were there and everything went to shit now the people that were getting together are blaming the Titans for the interruption. The whole thing is a mess and the news channel are not nice about the Titans as a whole, but I am not interested in exploring that here. All you need to know is that the people that made Cheshire do what she did to the Titans were the Brother Blood people.

It’s on the jet that we see Jason again, he and the others are going back to the tower. Because the news are painting the Titans as bad when they are arriving to the tower Jason sees a lot of people protesting about them and he feels bad. This was his first job with the Titans and he is a kid, imagine how sad it would make you if you wanted to help and after getting the job done people were mad at you. But even though he is sad about that he takes time to ask Roy if he is okay after he sees him almost running away from the tower, he doesn’t get a response but he isn’t mad about it.

Jason’s stay with the Titans comes to and end and he says that he loved hanging out with them and is grateful for having been invited, he is so sweet!

·         NTT (1884) #24

Here, for some reason, we see Jason saying goodbye to the Titans again and unlike at the end of #21 Roy is there to see him leave.

I am not going to lie though; I liked this goodbye better it feels like it’s more complete than the other one. Here he says that Batman wants him back in Gotham but that if the Titans ever need him again all they need to do is call. He also mentions Nightwing which is funny because he will be called by Donna again in #26 to help the Titans get Dick back from Brother Bloods Church.

I am going to cut this part here because issues 26 to 31 have a lot of Jason content that I want to explore and I can’t put any more pictures here, also this post is already long as it is now!

I just love Jason’s little moments in these issues, him confronting Donna and reading Roy like and open book in #20 are my absolute favourite, I just think this is a nice way to kinda show how wrong some current characterizations of Robin Jason are and what better way to do that than reading and looking into some good stories.

Oh! Before I forget, in #21 Roy leaves the Titans’ tower to go see Jade and he actually gets to meet his daughter Lian for the first time, so yeah, that was a wholesome moment!

[go-scottishgal14]

from Taki’s magazine...

The End Game

Bruce Antonio Laue

March 09, 2021

The wedding was marvelous, the weather superb. Crowds ten deep along the mall to Windsor Castle. An American bride for the warrior-prince. The pubs rang out with cheers “To the Royal Couple”!

A breath of fresh air; the Brits are always up for a breath of fresh air. They gave us the Rolling Stones, the Beatles, and the miniskirt, for heaven’s sake. And here she was, young, beautiful, American, an actress, Catholic, divorced, and biracial. Perfect. What could possibly go wrong? Meghan Markle was about to enter a life of luxury, glamour, and deference the likes of which few people can imagine, let alone aspire to, a life she craved but did not understand. The latest fashions, the finest entertainments, the love of a besotted young man who, with a little encouragement, might mimic the career of his kinsman, Lord Louis Mountbatten of Burma. All this, and at so little cost to the bride.

In exchange for all this, the British people expected her to try to stay awake while visiting the gluten-free gumball factory as the plant manager explains how the little suckers are produced. At times a plaque must be unveiled on the side of a post office, hospital, college, railway station, or army barracks. Occasionally little school children need to be patted on the head, no problem; the Duchess likes children, or so she says. And then there are the trips, lots and lots of trips; to Fiji, Lesotho, Tonga, Tuvalu, and many more places that Her Highness has never heard of, and there will be gifts and dinners and more gifts and more little heads to be patted. And then there are men standing in straight lines all wearing the same funny suits, carrying rifles because they have sworn to defend you and your family with their lives, if need be. All you have to do is walk past them down the line and smile. When you have a child, people will cheer and artillery will sound and bells will ring and there will be happiness everywhere. That’s it, that’s all that’s expected.

“To refuse to do your duty is a selfish impulse the British cannot understand.”

And it was unsurvivable. Unsurvivable.

There were some early clues; the toothless smile at the Trooping of the Colour (it was almost a smirk). The reticence in allowing photos of her newborn son Archie to be published. The move to Canada—well, all right, grandmother’s profile is on every coin so we’re not really that far away. But then California, bumming off friends or business contacts. Then Megxit—an act so shocking that it was easily compared to the 1936 abdication crisis. To refuse to do your duty is a selfish impulse the British cannot understand. It goes against their basic concepts of personal identity; it is akin to cowardice. Your duty is something you knew was expected of you when you were born to a specific role in society or took an oath to uphold certain principles or values. To dishonor them is to dishonor yourself. It is a way of thinking Meghan Markle cannot grasp.

And then the interview, complete with background music. Oprah, to her credit, said it was “your truth,” not “the truth.” Markle’s ridiculous contention that her son would not receive security protection or that he would not be provided a princely title is for an American audience not familiar with the workings of royal etiquette. Harry could have bestowed his subsidiary title of Baron Dumbarton on his infant son immediately but refused in an act of petty narcissism rare in British society. His whining about money, as if fully expecting his countrymen to finance his lifestyle after he objected to carrying out his royal role. And he spouted a lie that he thought the public might consider—that his father and brother were “trapped” in their roles, that their duty was thrust upon them as it was on him, that some devious entity had hijacked their true life paths. What garbage. It was a disingenuous ploy to escape the contempt merited by his failure of character.

In its totality, the Duke and Duchess of Sussex engaged in an act of pure selfishness that bespoke a lack of respect for their family, their country, and the service they had pledged to perform.

One can envision the reaction of the millions of women living in tiny houses or “council housing” trying to lovingly make them into homes for their families, clipping the 99-cent coupon for the roast beast Sunday feast, their mouths agape at the sheer nerve. One can only imagine the murmured comments at the Cavalry and Guards Club or White’s or the Victory Service, as everyone stood around the television in the library sipping single malts; “Well, no more balcony time for them,” “I’ll be damned,” “I wouldn’t have believed it if you had told me.” The pubs must have been silent, pints quietly poured as the Duchess described her awful royal existence from the garden of a nameless estate in the warm sunshine of California as people in London, Cardiff, Aberdeen, and Belfast continue to die from a pandemic in the cold, damp air of a British spring.

Prince Henry Mountbatten-Windsor, Duke of Sussex, seems consigned by his wife or by choice to a life of poolside parties, discussing the finer points of child rearing with his good friends Kanye and Wendy Williams, sipping pinot grigio while passing the appetizers to Fergie (the rapper, not his aunt), discussing the plight of the Ndebele with Lily Cole, and “making shapes” on the dance floor with the rest of the Beverly Hills bric-a-brac. It makes the life of his great-great uncle, the Duke of Windsor, and his wife from Baltimore look absolutely disciplined by comparison.

In Henry V the Bard has the King proclaim outside the walls of Harfleur, “The game’s afoot!” But in Prince Harry’s case, one might be forgiven to suspect that the game has ended.

[mash4077fruitmachine]

Klinger and the Lenny Bruce Story

So we know that Larry Gelbart created the part of Klinger partly based off of Lenny Bruce (the famous comedian). The tale goes that Bruce wore a woman’s naval (WAVE) uniform during World War II as a trick to get discharged. I happen to own his autobiography How to Talk Dirty and Influence People, which includes the full story (*a warning in advance for the slurs/ language used*). I honestly think it shows how much credit Jamie Farr should get for making a more three-dimensional character out of this.  

“In the Army you can get out if you’re a wack. Why couldn’t you get out of the Navy if you were a WAVE? Down in my bunk I had a copy of Psychopathia Sexualis by Krafft-Ebing. There it was. A transvestite is a nut who likes to get dressed up in women’s clothing. He may never engage in homosexual practice or do anything else antisocial. He’s completely harmless. But obviously he would be an inconvenience to the Navy, where they like to keep everything organized by having everyone dress alike.

I figured that if I could demonstrate to the Navy that I still had a great deal of patriotism and loyalty to the uniform, the old esprit de corps—rather than indulging myself with the obvious sort of feather-boa negligee and gold-lame mules drag outfit— then maybe instead of booting me out, they’d open the door politely and escort me out like an officer and a lady.

Swanson, one of my shipmates, could sew as well as a girl. He was also a beer addict. He’d do anything for a bottle of beer. In North Africa, Gibraltar, Malta, Corsica, Sicily—wherever we made port—they had given us chits that entitled us to so much beer. I didn’t drink beer, and I saved all my chits. Along with these—I won some gambling, and I also received quite a few for standing watch for different guys—I had enough beer chits to play Scrooge at an AA Christmas show. I gave my chits to Swanson, and his fingers flew to the task. The way he threw himself into his work made me wonder about him. With the pleats, the shields, everything, he made me a lieutenant.

For a while it was just scuttlebutt that a WAVE was seen promenading forward at the fo’c’sle during the midnight watch. A number of guys who saw it didn’t report it out of fear that they’d be given a Section 8 themselves. Finally one night I was doing my nautical Lady Macbeth when four guys, including the chief master-at-arms, jumped me. I yelled, “Masher!”

Four naval psychiatrists worked over me at Newport Naval Hospital.

FIRST OFFICER: “Lenny, have you ever actively engaged in any homosexual practice?”

LENNY: “No, sir.”

(An “active” homosexual is one who does the doing, and the “passive” is one who just lies back. In other words, if you were a kid and you were hitchhiking and some faggot came on with you and you let him do whatever his “do” was, he was an “active” homosexual because he performed a sexual act with someone of the same sex, and you are a “passive” homosexual if you allowed any of this to happen. You’ll never see this in an AAA driving manual, but that’s the way it is.)

SECOND OFFICER: “Do you enjoy the company of women?”

LENNY: “Yes, sir.”

THIRD OFFICER: “Do you enjoy having intercourse with women?”

LENNY: “Yes, sir.”

FOURTH OFFICER: “Do you enjoy wearing women’s clothing?”

LENNY: “Sometimes.”

ALL FOUR: “When is that?”

LENNY: “When they fit.”

I stuck to my story, and they finally gave up. Only, it didn’t work out the way I had figured it. They drew up an undesirable discharge.

At the last minute, though (this does sound like a fairy story, doesn’t it?), the Red Cross sent an attorney who reviewed the case and saw that the whole thing was ridiculous. There were no charges against me. The entire division was questioned, and when it was ascertained that I had a good credit rating in virility—based upon paid-up accounts in numerous Neapolitan bordellos—I received an honorable discharge.

So everything worked out all right, except that they took away my WAVE’S uniform. It bugged me because I wanted to have it as a sort of keepsake of the War. I wouldn’t ever wear it, naturally—except maybe on Halloween.” pg. 26-27

[wrenhyperfixates]

Anything

Pairing: Loki x reader Summary: When the Avengers latest mission is to visit local schools, Loki’s insecurities start to get the better of him. But with you to there comfort him, he realizes that with you by his side, he can do anything. Warnings: a little angsty, but mainly fluff A/N: Enjoy :)

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Disclaimer: Gif not mine

Loki frowned, looking out the window, down at the Avengers getting into Stark’s limo. They were doing some kind of awareness week at schools in the city, something or other about being a good citizen and staying safe. The God of Mischief had been invited to come, but he didn’t think it a particularly good idea. He’d never done anything with children before, and he wasn’t sure this was the best time to try.

“Loki?” you asked out of the blue. He whipped around at the sound of your voice. “What are you still doing here?”

“Oh, hello, darling. I just did not feel like going,” he said with a shrug. It wasn’t entirely a lie, but he still felt bad. “And what about you?”

“They insisted someone stay in case of an emergency call,” you explained. You weren’t totally sold on his excuse, but were terrified of pushing him, especially because things were going so well between you recently. “So that means we’re alone, right?”

“Yes, darling. Indeed, it does,” he replied, a smile curling on his lips.

Faster than lightning, Loki was pressing his lips to yours in a passionate kiss. You’d been dating for a little over a month, but were keeping it a secret from the rest of the Avengers. You both had your own reasons for that. Loki was afraid they wouldn’t approve and try to come between you. You, however were worried that Loki would put too much pressure on himself to be perfect if they knew, ending in him pulling away from you, convinced he wasn’t good enough. But either way, you agreed it was too soon to let them know. Soon, Loki had you pinned on the couch with his body, the raw desire in his kiss only growing. All too soon, you had to break for air, but you were quick to recapture his lips after catching your breath.

After a while, you were content to just lay with each other, cuddling while a movie played in the background. You were talking, and it reminded you of his flaky excuse from earlier. You were still worried about pressing, but god damn it, he was your boyfriend and you should be allowed to check on him.

“So...” you began.

“So?”

“So what’s the real reason why you didn’t go with the rest of the team?”

“Ah,” he said. “That.”

“Mhm. You don’t have to tell me,” you replied, caressing his cheek, “but you can always talk to me. I’m here for you, Loki. I promise.”

“I know, darling. Thank you,” he said against your skin as he nuzzled into your neck. He didn’t want to trouble you with what was on his mind, but your eyes were so innocent and full of adoration that he couldn’t resist. “I am afraid. Afraid that I would not be good with kids, that I would frighten them. Afraid that their parents would learn of my visit and cause an uproar. Afraid that I will never escape my past.”

“Oh, Loki,” you cooed, filled with compassion. You wanted to take his face in your hands, but he was still hiding in the crook of your neck. You settled for intertwining your fingers with his. “You are so, so much more than your past. New York wasn’t even your fault, for crying out loud. You are amazing, kind, insightful, compassionate, intelligent, beautiful. The list goes on and on, I assure you. The only way to deal with your fears is to face them head on, don’t you think? They may not even come true.”

You could feel his tears staining your skin, though he was obviously trying to hold them back. You were overcome with a powerful need to comfort him, to protect him from the world. It was so unfair that after all he’d been through, everyone who had hurt him, he blamed himself for all this. That he worried he wasn’t worthy of love when he was, in fact, the most deserving person you’d ever met.

“My darling,” he whispered, his voice breaking ever so slightly. Your chest swelled with pride as you realized you were one of the few—possibly the only—people he let himself be vulnerable with. “I cannot thank you enough for your words, truly.”

“You’re welcome, Loki,” you replied, taking a page out of his book and kissing the back of his hand. “You mean the world to me, my love.”

“And you the same to me,” he finally lifted his head up, and you turned to look at him. “I feel I can do anything with you at my side.”

“Does that mean what I think it does?”

“Yes. I will go with the rest of the team tomorrow if, and only if, you come with me.”

“Deal,” you agreed, kissing along his jawline and starting another make-out session.

Luckily, you heard the Avengers before you were in view of each other, giving you and Loki a chance to untangle yourselves and move to opposite ends of the couch. You shared a smile before turning your attentions to the TV as if that’s what you’d been doing the whole time.

“Well, I hope you two had a nice time while we were out doing hard work,” Tony joked.

“Tell you what,” you replied. “You get someone else to hold down the fort, and we’ll go tomorrow.”

“I’ll stay,” Bruce volunteered, a little too excitedly. He never was one for social settings. “Have fun.”

After catching up for a few minutes, you were all setting about your various tasks for the rest of the day. Before meeting Sam in the training room, you gave Loki’s hand a quick squeeze and pecked him on the cheek. Once you were gone, a feeling of dread settled in the pit of his stomach. But he’d meant what he said, and he was willing to do anything so long as you were there.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“What do you mean we can’t visit the same classroom?” you incredulously asked.

“It’s too slow,” Steve explained. “We cover more ground, so to speak, if we split up.”

“But can’t Loki and I be a pair? Please,” you pouted.

“Sorry guys,” he said. “We have to stick to the plan if we’re going to get to all the classes.”

You frowned as he walked away. You understood where he was coming from, but felt like he should have been able to make an exception. But it seemed like there was no getting him to budge, so you dropped the matter.

“Hey, at least our classes will be right next to each other,” you tried to comfort Loki as you all walked towards your assignments. “I’m sorry I can’t stay with you though. I know I promised.”

“Oh, my sweet darling,” Loki replied, pulling you aside to give you a quick kiss. “It is not your fault. It is some Midgardian rite of passage, is it not, to be scared on your first day of school?”

You smiled at the way he was cheering you up, despite obviously being very worried about the whole situation himself. Honestly, you really couldn’t fathom why anyone was afraid of this gentle, beautiful man before you. Why he was afraid of himself.

“I love you, Loki,” you said, giving him a big hug. He melted into your touch. “You’re going to be wonderful. You feel ok with this, right? We’ll figure something out if you don’t.”

“I shall muddle through, somehow,” he assured you. “It is like you said, I must face my fears.”

You gave him one last encouraging hug and smile before disappearing into the classroom you’d be talking in. He took a deep breath before knocking on the door of his assigned room. The teacher, a middle-aged man with hair starting to gray, welcomed him. It was a little unnerving to Loki that he seemed to have no qualms with the God of Mischief entering the threshold. The class, too, was watching him with nothing less than rapt attention and bright eyes. Perhaps you were right, after all, and not as many people as he thought were still holding onto the image he’d had when he first came to Midgard.

“Hello, children,” he began after a nervous gulp. “It is lovely to be here with you today.”

“Hello, Mr. Loki,” they chorused back.

As he began the talk on safety, he relaxed a bit. It was a room full of third graders, for Norns’ sake. He had faced off against fire serpents and sea monsters. Surely he could handle a group of kids. And as he soon found out, he was right indeed. More than handle, in fact; he was great with them! As he waltzed out of the room and into the next, he wondered if he might have a family of his own one day. He didn’t know how you felt about adopting, but he was starting to like the idea. It didn’t go too well for him in his childhood, but he could ensure that some other innocent kid won’t go through what he did. Besides, the circumstances were entirely different. Though, he supposed he was getting ahead of himself, imagining having a family with you. Still, it sent a thrill right to his heart.

After a very successful morning, he met back up with you. Being the first two done with the presentations, Loki took the opportunity to whisk you away to a secluded hallway to kiss you again.

“So it went well, I take it,” you laughed as you broke away.

“Just as you said it would, darling. I even had fun.”

“Well then, congratulations, my love. I think that deserves another kiss,” you said, wrapping your arms behind his neck.

“I think that you are right,” he agreed, tickling you a little.

As your lips met again, you heard a loud, overdramatic gasp that could only belong to Tony. You both sprung back from each other, realizing the hallway wasn’t as private as you’d originally believed. Besides Tony, the other Avengers were all standing there, taking in the scene too. Shooting each other a nervous glance, you and Loki braced yourselves for whatever came next.

“You two,” Tony said, feigning utter shock and hurt, “are dating? Woe is me! How could you keep this a secret from us, your dearest teammates?”

“Spare me, Stark,” Loki said, rolling his eyes and taking your hand. If you’d been found out, might as well be confident about it. “Yes, we are together. And I, for one, couldn’t be happier.”

“Neither could I,” you agreed, going to kiss him again.

“Now, now,” Tony interjected. He stood between you and put an arm over each of your shoulders, leading the way outside. “No kissing in the halls. But you know what? I think this is the start of an awesome era for the Avengers. Just think of all the jokes!”

You giggled as Loki rolled his eyes again, though he was fighting a losing battle with a grin. As you got into the limo, fingers locked once again, Loki began to accept something. It was right what you’d said about that not being the real him at the Battle of New York. No, he was himself now. Someone different, perhaps better and stronger than ever before. And it was you in a large part who had helped him see that. He knew in that moment that he’d been entirely right; with you by his side, he could do anything.