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#but i also need to come up with a style that i can continuously do in comic form
averlym · 1 year
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whshdfhfjf.,,,
#close up!! because i firstly Did Not render them with such insanity in order for tumblr's lack of general resolution to make it blur#look at all the lines!!! teehee i still really really like this style of digital painting it's super super fun to do!!! and also secondly#because i went back and added a tag ramble and as i seem to often be doing??? lately?? reached the 30 tag limit and went 'hm ok how else..'#anyway the tag essay on that one is now up and talks about the artwork generally and miscellaneous thoughts!! that said. i need a space to#ramble about beatrix at Length because look you don't draw and paint etc a character for like ten hours without having a lot of thoughts#anyways ! i digress terrifically. tag rambles are more like trains of thoughts masquerading as subways and you get on and it's unfortunately#a rollercoaster track. but this is My Blog and i can do Whatever I Want as long as i don't hurt anyone <- affirmations!! also Harm Principle#lately it's been like *kicks up feet* *opens tumblr tags* *treats it as own personal journal* and tbh Good for me!! anyways back to beatrix#fun fact ! the thing that pushed me over the edge to go watch the musical after looking through the tumblr tag was a very specific poll.#and the fact that the winning option was blue hair and pronouns made me double over laughing so hard i had to go see the source material#mm i feel like lately the academic Context has been tossing me essentially into a blender HAHA ;-; so everyone in adamandi is to some extent#a Mood. but bea-specific (haha be specific)(sorry!)(wow this is the same reaction mechanism of my friend who points out innuendos)(...)#i think it's the wanting to prove herself. like from the whole abuela etc thing there's proof here she's got a Stable Support System of sort#and instead what beatrix continues to do is push themselves. 'i guess u could say i'm married to my work? god that's depressing' // no one#here to enforce that // abuela tells me to rest says i'm constantly stressed and i'll just get depressed like before but i still have to try#like. that shred of desperation that pushes you to the brink to neglect yourself (well i guess physically but also your morals..) and like!!#the whole 'lose half your soul thing' proves she's self aware!! like they know what they're doing is super dubious yknow! but they're still#they're still doing it even if it goes into conflict with their morality system in a way and then they justify it to themselves (see pt 1#of ghostwriter) and the whole wanting to achieve at all costs Despite the self awareness. (i think? this aspect also applied to quincy. but#thoughts on him will come later). more beatrix specific also is the fact that they genuinely adore their work.. 'i just love it here where#you know they'll be printing forever and you are just part of it' because that does kind of resonate with me. also the being behind in the#competition is real!!! i'm maybe talking about Art as a subject because that same drive for it exists on my good days i think. even#even when nothing seems to be going right and you've ended up at the back the intent passion inherent in what you do is still there!!!#the genuine. care she has for reporting. is so !!!!! to me... other beatrix thoughts include 'why reveal yourself at the end' aka vincent's#'u should have stayed silent u had a smart plan' like rip to them but i would not // it feels with bea's complex character i can't imagine h#her Not doing that. like the guilt is real i guess. and i am running out of tags but! smth also about her fervent hope or smth that she'll#eventually get to where she wants. and the resilient determination.. 'i won't let their deaths be pointless there's more good i'm gonna do'#they're so so real for that. i'm not sure if it's a good or bad thing; seeing myself reflected in aspects of characters like this.. but it's#it's there regardless. smth smth just make your peace with the person you are ig!! tldr beatrix campbell my beloved. hehe#adamandi
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galacticlamps · 5 months
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actually ascension needs its own post since that's the one with the most details to speculate over and im starved for soho talk so i will talk to myself if need be
First the cover again, because I kinda can't get over it:
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my only thing is that I had been hoping we might get Lizbeth on a cover again since she's never been on one of the boxsets before, despite being the 2nd person credited on all 4 of them (even if that's just alphabetical, still, she's the only one of the four main characters who never makes the cover)
But letting that go...
I know we already kinda knew the brief for this one but damn I didn't expect it to go quite this hard. Maybe that's just because the Parasite & Ashenden covers were (comparatively) similarish to each other and I was so pleased with Unbegotten's, and then got so used to it as the placeholder for Ascension while they kept postponing it, I wasn't expecting anything this colorful or detailed or with what I can't help but register as Fun New Outfits even though these are still like, pretty damn basic as far as costumes go. Still, it's a different vibe from everyone in suits and trenchcoats on every cover, technically. (Oh the woes of being an audio fan such that two characters owning sweaters actually does qualify as new information)
On top of just being visually delightful though, I know we knew religion was gonna be a fairly big part of this one, but I didn't actually expect to get quite this much of it - though I'm glad of it for a number of reasons. The BF twitter already made the ineffable joke so I don't have to, but also yeah I did very much spend all of season 2 episode 4 of good omens half convinced Samuel Barnett & Dervla Kirwan were about to pop up around any given corner (if you will go around being gay supernatural and horrible at your messy bureaucratic jobs in midcentury soho then I'm sorry, this is where my brain's gonna go) - so, fuel to that fire. But in terms of actual important things, at least one of my Soho wishes looks to be being granted because we have a Rev Edward Folgate on the cast list, which must mean we're finally meeting Norton's father, even if his mother & brother don't appear (which they could, technically, I've definitely seen BF not list all the doublings on their cast tabs before). Religion, domesticity, and the nuclear family are all things that absolutely fascinate me when it comes to Norton's character, so getting any amount of story involving his father & his church is something I've been actively hoping for for a long time now.
(I will say I'm a tiny bit bummed Saffron Coomber isn't on the cast list to play Mia again, but I kinda figured she wasn't going to be since Greg Austin's Armitage, who's making his first recurring appearance after originating in Unbegotten, was listed ever since the boxset was announced - presumably if she was also returning, that would've been handled in the same way. But since Unbegotten ended with Lizbeth and Mia going on a date, I still held out hope. Who knows though, maybe things did go well for them and Lizbeth just has a better work/life balance than Norton so she can date someone without them getting dragged into every scifi plot. I know that's not a very common accomplishment for any Torchwood agent, but a gal can hope)
At this point I know I'm completely in the realm of speculation & even wishful thinking, but I'm really really hoping we get some more clues as to Norton's overall timeline in this one, and I have a feeling that even if there's nothing as direct as dates given, the events of a plot like this one are going to heavily influence my personal interpretation of it.
To say that life & death are major themes for the soho crew feels wildly reductive, but even by Torchwood's standards and taking into account its origins as a piece of media with Jack Harkness & his newfound immortality at the heart of it, the living/dead status of this bunch has always been fantastically up in the air to me. Obviously Ghost Mission introduced Norton as kind of a ghost before revealing more obvious ghostly characters later on to which the title might have been referring, but his being from the past did beg the question of his survival into Torchwood's present era all the same, which Outbreak later alludes to much more directly, and his habit of showing up via hologram in multiple stories only further obfuscates any certainty we might have about where & when he definitely can be said to be alive and well. Then you've got Lizbeth and Gideon both being effectively 'brought back to life' via paradoxes that prevented them ever having died in the first place. Again, they are very very far from being the only Torcwhood characters this happens to (for a sprawling EU, it's really rather impressive how often & in how many different ways Torchwood as a whole manages to circle back to being about like. chaotic undead queers at the end of every day. though I suppose that consistency is part of why I keep falling in love with its different iterations again and again). That's without even getting into the question of Norton's dubious fate in God Among Us - and I say dubious because I know some people take that to be his ultimate death, but I personally think that reading something as vague as that as having any kind of finality rather goes against the spirit of this whole world/series, not just because I want him to live. (There are obviously other ways to make him survive/reappear, but I don't see this as a River Song scenario where we can safely assume one of his earlier-released adventures had to happen at the end of his personal timeline). But wherever God Among Us falls for him, he does very much meet God in it - or at least, a god, since the sentinel in Unbegotten is also described as a god of sorts, and even if he doesn't ultimately have the status of the god Jacqueline King is playing there, Unbegotten is still full to bursting with ghosts/undead/came back wrong/echo characters to continue underscoring that life/afterlife theme.
So all things considered, even allowing for the fact that we know Norton's twin hobbies are lying about himself and abusing time travel to suit his own ends/ever-shifting alliances, I find it difficult to believe we could get through a whole 6-part boxset about religion & death without something providing some kind of compelling evidence about where this adventure fits in among his other run-ins with apocalypses and gods and ghosts and dead-but-still-here characters/creatures, so I'm very much looking forward to any further exploration on that front.
And lastly, and least intellectually, I really want to know what the hell 20th-century Torchwood's obsession with Reginalds is. Reading through the cast list, I had to do two separate doubletakes over the character 'Sir Reginald Peebles' - firstly, because I had Reginald Rigsby on the brain, this being Soho (and the other Troughton brother being so active on BF's releases for this same month) - and secondly, because reading this in conjunction with the announcement for the July monthly adventure in which the new main Torchwood guy of the 20s is apparently called Sir Reginald Dellafield, there was a brief moment where I took that monthly release to be a tie-in with Ascension. I don't expect it to be, but damn. was it really so popular a name?
anyways, catch me thinking about those stained glass windows for the next couple months I guess (and knowing Torchwood Soho, for a long long time after it comes out as well lol)
#torchwood soho: ascension#let's start with the most obvious shall we? behind norton - hellfire or divine radiance? whadda we think?#i know one's much more likely for him but also consider: he's been a fairly good boy by norton standards anyway lately#well i say 'lately' like i know when this takes place#idk why but i kinda feel like this starts very soon after unbegotten#comedy is probably why honestly. since that ends with them being like hey! something went right!#i think ever since i first heard that i was like ok cool so the next installment's gonna be something earth shatteringly bad#& it's gonna kick off dramatically literally one second after this scene ends right?#not that it wouldnt be nice to have some (clearly-defined) timeskip there#tbh i feel like that's the one thing that's missing with soho sometimes - those little medium-sized gaps in continuity#where either speculation or even a missing scenes style fic would go#between parasite & ashenden lizbeth was dead and andy wasnt in the right era for soho shenanigans#and norton and gideon went through SO much offscreen (offmic?)#rebuilding torchwood and starting a relationship and breaking up and getting possessed by space eels and destroying torchwood again#that's like... Too Much to analyze/meaningfully discuss without a few more details from canon#and between Ashenden & Unbegotten it's very unclear how much time has passed#norton certainly seems affected when he sees gideon again for the first time but we also know he went there for him so how long was it?#that and we have literally zero explanation for what andy's doing in the 50s in that one to begin with. has he been there continuously?#or did he leave and come back? if so did norton even have to try justifying it to him?#or does andy just accept at this point that he'll be summoned for anything norton feels is noteworthy? honestly either's plausible w him#but also we have so little confirmed about what torchwood looks like at this point in time!#maybe andy gets summoned for all missions bc he norton and lizbeth are virtually the only agents left after gideon quits#there's just a few too many things unexplained/alluded to for me to go total total fandom mode on this#speculating & theorizing about everything that happens off-audio#doubtless this is mainly bc of norton's general untrustworthiness#like im sure a different main character would've left the audience with fewer uncertainties after this many hours of storytelling#but with soho im still left needing just a tiiiiiny bit more before i feel im knowledgeable enough about the situation to expand upon it#in the traditional fandomy 'transformative' way#right now most of my fanning over it is just speculation about what precisely we can be confident in from the dialogue we do have#but i'd like to go further than that truly. these characters captivate me. obviously.
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kifu · 1 year
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A little bit of character design. ;) For a comic! That may never leave the brain.
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physalian · 3 months
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How to make your writing sound less stiff
Just a few suggestions. You shouldn’t have to compromise your writing style and voice with any of these, and some situations and scenes might demand some stiff or jerky writing to better convey emotion and immersion. I am not the first to come up with these, just circulating them again.
1. Vary sentence structure.
This is an example paragraph. You might see this generated from AI. I can’t help but read this in a robotic voice. It’s very flat and undynamic. No matter what the words are, it will be boring. It’s boring because you don’t think in stiff sentences. Comedians don’t tell jokes in stiff sentences. We don’t tell campfire stories in stiff sentences. These often lack flow between points, too.
So funnily enough, I had to sit through 87k words of a “romance” written just like this. It was stiff, janky, and very unpoetic. Which is fine, the author didn’t tell me it was erotica. It just felt like an old lady narrator, like Old Rose from Titanic telling the audience decades after the fact instead of living it right in the moment. It was in first person pov, too, which just made it worse. To be able to write something so explicit and yet so un-titillating was a talent. Like, beginner fanfic smut writers at least do it with enthusiasm.
2. Vary dialogue tag placement
You got three options, pre-, mid-, and post-tags.
Leader said, “this is a pre-dialogue tag.”
“This,” Lancer said, “is a mid-dialogue tag.”
“This is a post-dialogue tag,” Heart said.
Pre and Post have about the same effect but mid-tags do a lot of heavy lifting.
They help break up long paragraphs of dialogue that are jank to look at
They give you pauses for ~dramatic effect~
They prompt you to provide some other action, introspection, or scene descriptor with the tag. *don't forget that if you're continuing the sentence as if the tag wasn't there, not to capitalize the first word after the tag. Capitalize if the tag breaks up two complete sentences, not if it interrupts a single sentence.
It also looks better along the lefthand margin when you don’t start every paragraph with either the same character name, the same pronouns, or the same “ as it reads more natural and organic.
3. When the scene demands, get dynamic
General rule of thumb is that action scenes demand quick exchanges, short paragraphs, and very lean descriptors. Action scenes are where you put your juicy verbs to use and cut as many adverbs as you can. But regardless of if you’re in first person, second person, or third person limited, you can let the mood of the narrator bleed out into their narration.
Like, in horror, you can use a lot of onomatopoeia.
Drip Drip Drip
Or let the narration become jerky and unfocused and less strict in punctuation and maybe even a couple run-on sentences as your character struggles to think or catch their breath and is getting very overwhelmed.
You can toss out some grammar rules, too and get more poetic.
Warm breath tickles the back of her neck. It rattles, a quiet, soggy, rasp. She shivers. If she doesn’t look, it’s not there. If she doesn’t look, it’s not there. Sweat beads at her temple. Her heart thunders in her chest. Ba-bump-ba-bump-ba-bump-ba- It moves on, leaving a void of cold behind. She uncurls her fists, fingers achy and palms stinging from her nails. It’s gone.
4. Remember to balance dialogue, monologue, introspection, action, and descriptors.
The amount of times I have been faced with giant blocks of dialogue with zero tags, zero emotions, just speech on a page like they’re notecards to be read on a stage is higher than I expected. Don’t forget that though you may know exactly how your dialogue sounds in your head, your readers don’t. They need dialogue tags to pick up on things like tone, specifically for sarcasm and sincerity, whether a character is joking or hurt or happy.
If you’ve written a block of text (usually exposition or backstory stuff) that’s longer than 50 words, figure out a way to trim it. No matter what, break it up into multiple sections and fill in those breaks with important narrative that reflects the narrator’s feelings on what they’re saying and whoever they’re speaking to’s reaction to the words being said. Otherwise it’s meaningless.
Hope this helps anyone struggling! Now get writing.
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saudadeko · 1 year
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ADHD tips from a girlie who was diagnosed in her late twenties and has had little to no support since and is being so brave about it:
1) Make it easy, make it accessible, and make it appealing. If anything this is the most important thing, all tips going forward are based around this concept.
2) That thing you think would help you but you haven’t bought/done it yet because you’re technically surviving without it? Buy it, you need it. It doesn’t matter if people around you might think it’s wasteful or that you’re lazy, you’re not, just do it, trust me.
3) Expanding on tip #2, if you’re like me and eggs are your main source of protein because they’re quick and easy and feeding yourself is a near insurmountable task- buy yourself an electric egg cooker, make a bunch of hard boiled eggs and keep them in your fridge for quick and easy protein to add to any meal (handful of crackers, a hard boiled egg and a banana? 5 star meal right there. Or mash them up with some mayo for egg salad sandwiches). Other easy proteins include: potstickers (put them in instant ramen), edamame (they have microwaveable snack packs), chickpeas (put in salads!), beans (can of beans microwaved with shredded cheese and some tortilla chips), peanut butter (with crackers, apple and cheese, adult lunchable style), and tofu (cut into cubes, throw them into a ziplock with some seasoning and potato starch, shake that shit up and bake it until crispy).
4) Spend a little extra (if you are able) on daily use items that excite you, it will make you more likely to remember/want to do said daily task. For example: the only reason I remember to use sunscreen is because I bought some fancy japanese sunscreen that smells like roses so I get excited to use it, same for laundry detergent and body wash! there’s a gajillion different body wash scents out there, switch it up!
5) If there’s a task you continuously struggle with take a moment to think about which part of the task is making it difficult, it could be something even as small as “I don’t put my dirty clothes in the hamper because my hamper has a lid on it and lifting the lid is one step too many-”, sounds a little stupid huh? But trust your gut, it’s not stupid if it works. See tip #2 and BUY A HAMPER WITHOUT A LID.
6) If you are having trouble starting a task, break the task down further, sometimes the way I start a task is just by going “Ok step 1) stand up-“ and so forth. Don’t worry about the task as a whole just take it one step at a time.
7) If you’re halfway through a task and have to stop, leave it out. All this, “Put things away when you’re done with them.” is bullshit. you will be much more likely to finish the task if restarting it is easier because you left it out plus it’s a visual reminder. You can also create faux deadlines like “I gotta finish this project before my friend comes over on tuesday because after I finish it I can clean off the dinner table.” etc.
8) It’s okay to outsource tasks and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise, humans are designed to ask for, and to require help (what do babies do when they’re first born?? cry for help!!) ask for help and receive help without shame, if it makes your life better, you are WINNING.
9) If you have one big overwhelming task that you think you need to get done before anything else, but you feel motivated to do other tasks, do those other tasks first, it’s okay. Otherwise in all likelihood (at least in my case) you’ll put everything off until the last minute and then have to do said overwhelming task and those other tasks won’t get done at all. Doing those smaller tasks also lowers the mental load and you can use them as a motivation launch pad to tackle bigger things.
10) If you notice you tend to not put something away/forget to do something, perhaps consider moving and storing the item closer to where it ultimately ends up or where you are more likely to see it. For example, my makeup, pills, and mail are all stored on my desk because that’s where I tend to do my makeup, take my pills and deal with my mail. I used to store my pills in my bathroom medicine cabinet but all too often I would forget because they weren’t in my line of sight. Now that they’re on my desk, I have multiple chances per day to pass by them, go “oh I gotta take those.” and take them.
11) Open storage, open storage, OPEN STORAGE.
12) Motivation can look like all kinds of things. sometimes the only reason I get out of bed is because I remember I have a fun snack and I get to go eat it if I get up. It’s okay to lean into those simple “animal-brain” type motivators, you’ll eat because then you can use that fun new kitchen gadget you got a daiso? Neat. you’ll shower because then you can paint your nails that fun new color you got? Fantastic. You’ll go to the dmv and do that annoying thing because you’ll take yourself out for boba after? Superb. Lean-IN to those small motivators, they aren’t stupid or childish, they are VITAL.
13) Don’t buy into the cult of “if it’s worth doing, do it properly” it’s guaranteed to set you up for failure. If it’s worth doing, do it in whatever capacity you are able to. I put sunscreen on once a day because that’s fucking better than not doing it at all and I sure as all hell will fail at reapplying it multiple times a day. If it’s worth doing, do it half-assed babieeee.
Go forth and prosper!!! xoxo ✌️🩵
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bbydoll18xx · 3 months
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She's Such a Good Girl
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You move in across the hall from Paige Bueckers. It doesn’t take long before she tries to shatter your innocent persona. And you just let her. 
Paige Bueckers x reader
Word Count: 1.9k
Themes: reader is a shy lil baby, a few inappropriate thoughts, paige being a huge flirt
Masterlist
A/N: hiii cuties! So I had a few ideas I've been toying around with, so I merged them together and came up with this. Also the third part of 'I Can Do It With a Broken Heart' will hopefully be out soon but I'm still trying to figure out the direction I want to take it in. Enjoy!
~
Your breaths are ragged as you lug your final suitcase through the front door of your new apartment. It was your senior year at UCONN, and you and your roommates had been assigned a new apartment, which you were ecstatic about. Long gone were the days of being squished into an old dorm room. And you were very excited about the lack of noise, which had kept you from your much needed 10 hours of sleep the past few years. 
The August heat was stifling, but you welcomed the cool air coming through the vents, as you began organizing your new bedroom to perfection. Eagerness bubbled in your chest as you thought about your upcoming year before graduation. You’d finally be free. 
College was supposed to be the time to find yourself before being inevitably dragged into the cruel pits of the real world. It was the time to go wild, get drunk often, and maybe even meet the love of your life. But you had spent your weekends studying and fine tuning the ‘good girl’ persona that you had adopted when you were a child. 
You were the eldest daughter with a raging people pleasing complex, and it was starting to feel like your downfall. Your two roommates had found adoring boyfriends, and they often found themselves drunk as hell on the weekends, reveling in being young and carefree. You were growing to hate your crippling shyness.
You’d be lying if you said your lack of experience hadn’t started to weigh on you. You really wanted to learn how to put yourself out there. But you were dreadfully shy, and the idea of dating or hooking up was terrifying. Your innocence was fucking embarrassing. How would you explain to someone that you were a virgin? And what if they thought you were too timid to be good in bed?
So you just continued on as you had been throughout college; you studied, and you buried yourself in your imagination, and you prayed and hoped that someone would be willing to overlook all of your own insecurities. 
Your thoughts of pity are interrupted by your two roommates calling your name. You walk out of your bedroom into the living room where the two girls are sharing shiteating grins, and you send them a questioning look.
“You’ll never guess who is across the hall from us,” Sarah says slyly, causing a pang of worry to shoot through your chest. The smirk on her face grew as you asked who it was.
“Paige Bueckers,” your other roommate, Taylor, shrieks as your face turns bright red.
Fuck. 
“You’re fucking joking, right?” You whisper, eyes automatically flitting towards your door. 
“Nope! I saw her and Aubrey Griffin walk out of the apartment literally five minutes ago,” Taylor announces, laughing as you fall backwards onto the couch.
“This is not good,” you whine dramatically, hands covering your face. 
“Now you can see her pretty face every day,” Sarah all but sings, taking great pleasure in how uncomfortable you felt.
You scoff in indignation. “I can see her pretty face every day from the safety and comfort of my phone. It’s not like I’m actually ever going to talk to her.”
Your roommates pout at your sheer stubbornness. They had been trying to get you out of your shell from the last few years, much to your displeasure. 
“C’mon, you’re so hot. You could totally catch Paige’s eye. You gotta have more confidence, girl,” Taylor all but whines exasperatedly. 
“Yeah, sure,” you snort derisively. “Maybe while I’m at it, I can rizz up Harry Styles.” You roll your eyes at their ridiculousness.
They sigh in unison, stopping their pleading.
“We’ll just have to see what happens,” Taylor says with a dramatic wink, causing you to stick out your tongue childishly. 
“I have spent the last three years avoiding Paige Bueckers’ beauty. I can do it one more year.”
Little did you know, though, that it would become quite hard to avoid the tall blonde.
~
Friday evening rolls around quickly, and because it was the last weekend before classes started, the students were eager to party it up. You had hoped the apartment building would be quiet, empty from the throngs of students out partying elsewhere. But the girls of the basketball team had other ideas.
The last few days, you had seen multiple girls coming and going from Paige’s apartment. The noise had been loud, but nothing too crazy. It was well known that the girls often went live on tiktok or instagram, and you had heard their laughter across the hall last night. So far, though, the volume levels had maintained a respectable level. 
You had obviously jinxed yourself by thinking that, as the laughter and music pounded through your own walls. The cacophonous sound sent you spiraling. If you wanted them to be quieter, you would have to go ask them to turn it down, and you hated confrontation.
But you were alone tonight, and if you wanted to go to sleep at a decent hour, that was your only option. 
You move in front of the mirror in your bathroom, subconsciously fixing your hair and muttering words of encouragement to yourself. You could do this. Paige is just a regular person. Sure, she was ridiculously attractive, but she was just a girl.
You walk out of the apartment into the hallway, your heart pounding dangerously as you near the door. The volume was insane, and you felt momentarily sad that you were wasting your Friday night alone at home, while everyone was having the time of their lives. 
You shake your head, internally chastising yourself for the brutal thoughts, and with all the courage you could muster up, you knock loudly on the door, hoping the basketball team could hear it through the noise. 
A few moments pass, and you momentarily think you’re about to pass out before the door opens and you are met with the glorious face of Paige fucking Bueckers. 
You gulp, immediately grabbing a lock of hair to play with, desperately attempting to mask your anxiety. You bite your lip and look up at her.
“H-hi,” you stutter, feeling the blush bloom in your cheeks. “I’m so sorry to bother you guys, but the music is a little loud.”
Paige's face morphs into a look of surprise. “Oh shit. I’m sorry. I told KK to turn it down, but no one listens to me around here,” she jokes. “You live across the hall, right? I’m Paige!”
Her friendliness doesn’t necessarily shock you; she was well known for being a genuinely kind person around campus, but the fact that she knew who you were does shock you.
“Uh, yeah I do.” You introduce yourself with a shy smile, growing warmer under her gaze.
“Why don’t you come hang with us?” She prods, gesturing towards the living room with a large grin on her beautiful fucking face. 
Your carefully crafted plan to forget about Paige this year was crumbling around you. And before you could even begin to thinking about stopping yourself, you shyly accept her invitation.
There was no going back now. 
Paige ushers you in, leading you into the chaos, where most of the basketball team were enthralled in making tiktoks. 
As you walk in and stand next to Paige, you look around, all but staring at the tall girls. The whole basketball team was ridiculously attractive, and it made your shyness increase tenfold. Paige gets their attention, and their eyes turn to you as Paige introduces you. 
“She just moved in across the hall. And I told you the music was too loud, KK,” Paige adds, sending a sharp look towards the younger girl. 
She grins mischievously, walking up to you with the swagger you could only dream of having. 
“Sorry, girly pop, we’ll keep it down next time,” KK says, sending you a wink. You giggle in response, feeling more at ease already. 
Paige introduces you to the rest of the team. They’re all so friendly, and your nervous demeanor slowly melts away as you acclimate to their boisterousness. They take turns talking to you, but Paige stays beside you, never being more than an arms length away. 
You weren’t going to read into it. But the little voice in your head was screaming in both apprehension and glee. In the same way, you did not want to leave her side. In an insanely short amount of time, her presence had become a comfort to you, and you weren’t quite ready to give that up yet. So despite it being well past your respectable bedtime, you powered through, Paige’s aura energizing you. 
As you mused over your thoughts, Paige was stuck in her own head. She had seen you around campus before; your pretty face was a difficult one to forget, and she was secretly delighted when she had opened her door to reveal your timid face. 
She was determined to break you out of your shell. Little did she know how much she would. 
~
You look down at your phone a while later, and you’re shocked to see that it was just past midnight. You could not remember the last time you were out that late, and a yawn threatens to escape from the depths of your throat. You subtly rub at your eyes, and Paige doesn’t miss it. 
She nudges you, and you look up to gaze at her bright blue eyes.
God, she was so pretty. 
“You sleepy?” She asks teasingly, and you nod, a blush creeping up your neck again. 
“I’m not used to staying up this late. I should probably head back home,” you say, regret lacing your words. 
Paige nods, standing up to walk you out to the door. You don’t miss how her hand grazes your waist as she guides you. 
You wave goodbye to the girls who still remained, and they enthusiastically bid you a goodnight, making you promise to join them again soon. 
“Thanks for letting me crash,” you profess, heart still pounding dangerously from the subtle touches, tingles on your waist left in her wake. 
“Course,” she shrugs, a smirk on her face. She hands you her phone. “Let me know if we’re too loud again,” she whispers, leaning down to your ear. 
Her closeness has you flustered, and you quickly enter your contact information, avoiding the heat of her gaze. 
As you hand her cell phone back, her fingers brush across yours, and you subconsciously bite your lip to hold back a shaky breath from the view of her long fingers and her big, veiny hands. 
Fuck. 
The smirk doesn’t fade from Paige’s face as she notices you staring, and your face erupts in a vicious blush once more. . 
With a bashful wave and a smile, you leave, all but running back into your apartment. Your heart was pounding, and there was a slight ache down in your most intimate area that had you squirming in desire. 
Your little crush on Paige had been unrelenting the last few years, but it was still just casual. Things had changed, though, and now your feelings were undeniable. Long gone were the days of ignoring your sexuality.
Paige was so hot. And you were so screwed. 
~
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Please, please, please let me know what you think and if you want another part (or more)! Again, thanks for all the love and support!
xoxo katy
1K notes · View notes
rizsu · 6 months
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the husband and his type of style jujutsu kaisen ⭒ fem-reader.
⤹ list ﹢ nanami kento, toji fushiguro, gojo satoru, choso.
﹙ syn ﹚ headcanons — as husbands, they all have their own unique characteristic.
+ love ‘su: “i thought you hated cho—” 🔇🔇🔇
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NANAMI KENTO : the “get dressed” husband.
nanami's a man of his word. you want to eat out for dinner? get dressed by 7:00 p.m. you feel like doing a random grocery run? be ready by lunch, he'll come pick you up.
to nanami, nothing is more important than his wife's wants. having necessary items serve their purpose, obviously, but who doesn't like having their wants satisfied? he can never be one to hold you back from it.
happy wife, happy life. the motto he worships. as a man of tradition, he'd take a sick leave from his job if you wanted extra attention. a spoiler to the bone. whatever you want, just say the word and he'll tell you when to get ready.
TOJI FUSHIGURO : the “i'll make it” husband.
the king of craft. toji not only serves as eye candy for your eyes only, he also serves as your person handyman! whether it's to make, break, fix, or repair, he'll have the job done in no time. give him two hours, a beer, and a hammer.
to be loved is to be seen. for toji, he knows when you wish for something to be added to make daily activity easier. since you often crave snacks during the night, he reworked the nightstand's drawers into a small pantry filled with snacks.
sometimes you like to continue watching your show despite what you're doing. with this in mind, his new project is to either make a space into the shower wall where you can safely place your phone, or make a table for the bathtub when you're relaxing.
GOJO SATORU : the “don't you dare throw that away” husband.
a hoarder. most of the time, the items that gojo's been piling up in his studio are things that no longer serve him any purpose nor value. he simply doesn't feel like trashing it.
he'd run up the excuses that it's there for nostalgia, but if you ask him where or who the object came from, he'd be unable to answer. many times this led to unnecessary arguments. there was a time it got bad to the point he'd place the objects around the house out of pettiness.
this downside has its upside. with his hoarder mentality, you're guaranteed to find something you swore to the heavens you lost. there is always good in bad!
CHOSO : the “i miss my wife” husband.
doing grocery runs alone? he misses his wife. seeing a couple holding hands? he misses his wife. someone holding something that's enjoyed or liked by you? he misses his wife.
it's gotten to the point where if he's ever invited to a boys' night, the sentence “i miss my wife” is banned. if he says it he'll have to clean everyone's vehicle. to them, it's annoying. to you, it's peak husbandnity.
choso depends on you as much as you depend on him. oftentimes he needs a moment alone and you're always there to hold his hand. he's gotten used to such behaviour, so when he's set apart from you, the “i miss my wife” gets wicked.
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coldfanbou · 2 months
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Waking Up To Something
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A little Dubu for you all. She's very sweet here. Also you have no idea how hard it was to go against the slutty student Dubu thoughts that kept creeping in.
Length 2.6K
Dahyun X Mreader
“Wake up! What are you doing? Hurry!” Groggily opening your eyes, you look to the side, and Dahyun shakes you. “We have school! Wake up!”  You try to wave Dahyun off, but she refuses to let you return to your peaceful slumber. Dahyun huffs, seeing that you won’t get up. She straddles you and grabs your shoulders as she shakes you back and forth. “We don’t have time for this!” She whines.
“Mmm, fine.” You grumble, finally sitting up. You shut your eyes for a moment, still sleepy. You feel Dahyun’s weight move off you, and when you open your eyes again, she grabs your clothes from your closet. You look her up and down, seeing her in her school uniform. That’s when you remember that today was the first day of school. With a burst of energy, you get up and shoo Dahyun out of the room, pushing her out while grabbing your pants from her hands.
“Hey!”
“No time; we have school,” you tell her as you rush to put on your uniform. 
Dahyun pounds on the door, “That’s what I tried to tell you!” The door stops shaking, and you hear Dahyun walk away. You finish getting dressed and grab your things before rushing to the front. Dahyun is anxiously tapping her feet, staring at the clock hanging on the far wall. Noticing that you finally came down, she jumps to her feet and grabs your hand, rushing you both out the door and to school. “We’re going to be so late because of you!” She shouts, running as fast as she can. “It’s our first day back, and we’re going to be late!” She says, looking over her shoulder at you, her frustration evident in her voice.
“You could have gone without me!” You shout back, picking up speed and running past her. You grab Dahyun’s hand; it’s her turn to be dragged around. 
“You wouldn’t even know today was the first day if I hadn’t come!” Dahyun tries to keep pace with you, her backpack swinging from side to side. 
“You’re going to slow!” You slow down, waiting for Dahyun to pass you. You pick her up as soon as she does, carrying her bridal style as you continue your mad dash to school. Dahyun smacks you before covering her eyes, embarrassed to be carried around like this. You make it to school and run to your classroom with Dahyun, the bell ringing just before you enter. Both you and Dahyun hang your heads in defeat as the teacher calls you out for being late, but there's also a sense of relief that you made it. Taking your seat next to Dahyun, she quietly scolds you for not waking up earlier. 
During lunch, Dahyun continues, “You do this every year. You don’t realize it's the first day, and we end up coming in late.”
“I told you. You don’t have to wake me up.”
“I do; that’s what a friend does.” Dahyun retorts. “We’ve been friends for years, and you just don’t learn. What do I have to do live with you?” There’s frustration in her voice. You know what you have to do to calm her down. You pull a small piece of chocolate from your pocket and hand it to her. “That’s not enough. I need more,” Dahyun says, staring at you.
“Seriously?” By the look in her eye, she is more than serious. You grab another piece and hand it to her. Dahyun smirks as she unwraps one of the chocolate pieces, munching on it with a big smile. 
“You know what? I’ve decided. I’m going to live with you now. Our parents will be completely fine with it. We’ve known each other for years, after all.” 
“I really don’t want that.” 
“Too bad,” Dahyun says, eating the second chocolate. As the bell rings for the end of lunch, the two of you head back to class. 
At the end of the day, you return home together. You walk into your home, and Dahyun into hers. A few hours go by before you hear the sound of something rolling into the house. As you come downstairs, you see Dahyun with her parents and a couple of suitcases. “You can’t be serious,” you say to her.
“I told you,” she replies. You all sit down and have a conversation, and your parents agree to let Dahyun sleep in the spare room. Dahyun nudges your leg. “I’ll make lots of noise in the morning, so you have to wake up,” she whispers. You don’t feel happy about having Dahyun live with you, thinking of it as unnecessary. 
The first week of living with Dahyun went well enough. It felt odd, but you thought you would get used to it. One morning, you woke up early.  You head to the bathroom, still tired and barely aware of the world around you. Dahyun was on the other side of the bathroom door. You both stood there for a moment, not moving. Your eyes are glued to her body for those few seconds. They move up her body, her pale skin still dripping with the water from her shower. You pass over her pink cunt; with her pale skin, it stands out. As do her nipples that stood at attention, stiff from the room’s cold air. You were getting hard, and Dahyun noticed. The few seconds you had to look at her body ran out. Dahyun covered her body with a towel, and you shut the door, staying on the outside. You told Dahyun how sorry you were before heading to your room.
The rest of the day was awkward between you. When you returned home, Dahyun went straight to her room, not saying a word to you. That night, though, she came to your room, knocking quietly on the door. “Come in,” she said. 
Dahyun opened the door slowly, walking inside without a word and sitting on your bed. Silence reigns over you both. Neither of you wants to say the first word. Then you both speak at once, and you give Dahyun the chance to speak. “I want to talk about this morning.” You nod along, knowing it was a conversation you needed to have. You apologize to Dahyun again and let her continue. “I…noticed that…” Dahyun mulls over her thoughts, clasping her hands together as she figures out what to say. “This isn’t how I wanted to do it, but I feel like I have to.” Dahyun turns to face you. “I like you… romantically.” You’re stunned and confused because you thought Dahyun would never be interested in you like that. Dahyun taps her hands along her leg, taking a deep breath. “I’ve loved you for a long time now, to be honest. It’s the reason I put up with you.” Dahyun says, a nervous smile growing on her. “ I-look, I forgive you for walking in on me this morning. I just want to get even, so you should show me your cock.” She said in a half-joking tone. You could tell Dahyun was trying to avoid the real conversation.
You stand up, stripping naked in front of Dahyun without a word before sitting back down. You notice Dahyun’s body tense up. It’s odd being nude in front of Dahyun, unnatural, but you chose to do it so you could continue without her holding anything against you. As ridiculous as that may sound, it made sense to you, considering you know Dahyun would try to keep the conversation going at that point. “You love me, Dahyun?”
She stumbles over her words; Dahyun is in complete shock that you are naked in front of her. She couldn’t help but look at your cock. Her eyes wander back to it no matter how many times she pries her eyes away. She gives you a nod, gulping as she tries to focus on something else. “I, um, please put your clothes back on. I can’t talk to you otherwise.” Dahyun blurts out, turning her head. You cloth yourself, telling Dahyun she can look. Seeing you fully clothed, Dahyun takes a deep breath. “Okay, now I can talk. I do love you, and I don’t know; after you saw me naked, I sort of felt like I had to confess. I noticed that you got hard, d-did you like my body?” You nod, feeling the heat rush to your face and getting too embarrassed to speak. “I thought so, but it’s not the only reason you like me, right?”
“Dahyun, this is the first time I’ve seen it.” You smack the top of her head lightly. “Of course not. I like you for you, you goofball. Honestly, I never thought you liked me like that. I don’t know where to go from here. What should we do?” 
Dahyun scoots closer, taking your hand in hers. She stares into your eyes, gathering her courage. Silently, she leans in and presses her lips against yours. It feels right, and you both fill it with passion. You push forward, knocking Dahyun onto her back as your kiss continues. She hesitantly wraps her hands around your neck, holding you close as your hands wander to her waist. When you run out of breath, you break the kiss. Your room is filled with the sound of your heavy breathing. Dahyun gulps, bringing herself up for another kiss. “We can go all the way if you want. I trust you.” 
“Are you sure?”
Dahyun nods, a soft smile on her face, “I want you. I want to be with you.” Dahyun moves her hand to her shirt, unbuttoning her pajamas slowly as you remain over her. As the last button slips away, she pulls her shirt apart to reveal her upper body. Seeing your eyes stick to her chest, Dahyun smiles and feels more confident. You lean down, getting closer to her chest. You plant tiny kisses on her mounds; they make Dahyun shudder. She turns her head to the side, making her gasps known before shutting her eyes. Dahyun focuses on the sensations, ingraining in her memory the feel of your hands on her breasts, the way you’re circling her nipple with your thumb. She bites her lip, enjoying the pleasure. 
You stop in your tracks, staring at Dahyun until she opens her eyes. “Why did you stop.”
“I want to know if you really want this.”
Dahyun feels her heart about to beat out of her chest. She wishes you hadn’t asked that question; putting her on the spot scared her as if she was about to make a leap of faith. “I’m sure,” she says softly. Dahyun reaches down, lifting her hips off the bed as beginning to pull off her pajama pants. You help Dahyun, pulling them completely off her. 
The sight of a beautiful woman, much less Dahyun, in your bed, was something you wouldn’t have thought would happen at the beginning of the day, but here she was. She’s left solely in her panties, a pink pair that suited her well. There was a wet spot on them. Dahyun covers her face as you pull her panties down, her heart racing as she bares her body to you again. 
You strip down before climbing over Dahyun. The soft fragrance of her perfume hits you as you stare at her body. You take in every detail, leaving nothing amiss as you grab her thighs and move them further apart. Hesitantly, you rub your between her wet folds, coating it in her nectar. Dahyun grabs one of your pillows, moaning into it. You take the pillow from her, tossing it to the side before cupping her cheeks and kissing her again. Her eyes flutter, and she mutters, “I love you.” You prepare yourself taking a deep breath as you press your cock against her entrance. You look into her eyes as you push in. You take her hands, holding them as you slowly move in; her walls squeeze your cock. You grunt and groan as you bury yourself inside Dahyun. She gasps, feeling you inside her. Dahyun wraps her legs around your waist. “I don’t want you pulling out,” she moans. 
Dahyun wraps her arms around you, holding you against her as you begin moving. Dahyun feels you move; your cock hits deep, making her cry out. Your thrusts begin slow, allowing her to adjust before gaining speed. Soon, you were pistoning in and out of Dahyun, chasing your orgasm. Dahyun bites her lips, trying to stay quiet. “Kiss me, please,” she whines. 
You give her as much, pressing your lips against hers and letting her moan into it. Her walls squeezed you, and you felt her nipples grow hard as they rubbed against your chest. You squeeze her soft thighs, feeling the plump flesh rebound as you move your hands to her breasts. You’re both quickly approaching your climax; your constant thrusts make Dahyun whimper, and her nails dig into your back. You hold the kiss, keeping her cry muffled as your walls clamp down on your cock. The pleasure becomes unbearable, and you find yourself cumming inside Dahyun as she pushes you in deeper with her legs. 
Her walls milk you, coaxing your cum out and funneling it into her womb. When Dahyun’s voice grows quiet, you break the kiss. “You came inside me,” she says with a smile. Dahyun caresses your cheek, a tired look on her face. Too tired to continue, you lay your head on her chest, drifting off to sleep along while still inside her. 
You wake the following morning to the sounds of someone slurping. As you look down at your body, you see Dahyun between her legs, bobbing her head. You let out a moan, signaling to her that you were awake. She pulls back, stroking your shaft with her soft hand, “Good morning, sleepyhead. We have school soon, so you better hurry up.”
“What are you doing?” You ask, enjoying how her hand moves along your shaft.
Dahyun looks down, shy and embarrassed. “I thought you would want me to wake you up like this instead. It’s what a girlfriend would do, right?” Dahyun is looking for approval and a way to mask her desires. 
You play along, nodding. “Yeah, thanks, Dahyun. This is a lot better than shaking me awake.” Dahyun smiles at you and bends over, wrapping her lips around your cock, her tongue clumsily swirling around the tip. She bobs her head slightly, unable to take much in without gagging. Still, it feels good; her warm mouth and tongue bring you to your climax, and you cum. The first few shots hit her tongue and take Dahyun by surprise. She recoils, allowing the last few to spurt onto her face and chest. The sight of Dahyun soiled with your cum arouses you and gets you hard again. 
Dahyun looks down, noticing your cock is still hard. She sighs, but as her eyes meet yours, she smiles. “Be quick, okay?” She says, turning around and raising her ass to you.  When you don’t immediately take her, Dahyun looks over her shoulder.“I want to try this position, okay?” She says hurriedly before burying her face into the bed. You don’t question it, smacking her ass before taking her. When you finished, there was barely time to make it to school, and you ended up coming in late again. At lunch, Dahyun criticizes you much like the first day, but she comes around at the end. “You’re lucky I really enjoy it too, or I would threaten to not have sex with you anymore. Let’s just start earlier.” She says quietly, grabbing onto your hand and holding it tightly. 
“That’s fine by me, but you need to be quiet unless you want our parents to find out.” Dahyun smacks your chest.
“Don’t say that!” She shouts. After a minute, Dahyun grumbles, “We’ll have to tell them we’re dating soon anyway. Dating…” Dahyun contemplates the word for a second, a smile growing on her face as she turns to face you. She kisses your cheek softly, “Still, it’s really nice. The sound of it, I mean.”
662 notes · View notes
justauthoring · 7 months
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change in perspective.
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you never thought jamie tartt could be anything but a prick.
a/n: i have no explanation for this other than i just finished ted lasso (fashionably late as always) and this man makes me giggle like a little school girl :) (this is also not spellchecked! i'll do it later ;))
pairing: jamie tart x f!assistant coach!reader
“Does someone want to explain to me just what exactly Jamie Tartt is doing out on the field?”
All three coaches turn to you at the sound of your voice, but it’s Ted’s eyes that light up the second he registers your presence. A smile curls onto his lips as he turns to face you, posture nonchalant with his hands shoved into his pockets. “Ah! Well, if it isn’t my favourite assistant coach, Y/N! I was worried something had happened.”
Blinking back at Ted, you simply cross your arms over your chest. “What is Jamie doing out on the field?”
Ted lets out a laugh but it comes across more as a grimace as he rubs the back of his neck, turning his head to glance at Nate and then Beard. 
It’s Beard who explains. 
“Ted invited him back to the team.”
The water bottle you’d been holding in your hands promptly falls to the ground with a thud as your lips part, mouth left wide open, staring blank faced at Ted who continues to laugh somewhat uncomfortably.
“What?”
Beard raises his hands as if to gesture that he is an innocent party in your accusation all whilst you shift your shocked expression to a glare at Ted.
“Well, you know… I–I just thought that, well… he’s a good player, yeah?”
Shaking your head, you huff; “regrettably so.” Because even you weren’t bitter enough to not admit that Jamie was a great football player. Fantastic really. But–But he was an absolute prick who you’d thought you’d never have to work with ever again.
“And this team needs a little something to spice us up, yeah?” Ted, in Ted style, does a little dance (that’s meant to make you laugh) to add to the effect of his words.
“No,” you say blankly, before Ted raises a brow at you. Sighing, your shoulders fall. “Yeah.”
Offering you a smile, Ted rests his hand on your shoulder, giving it a light squeeze. “Give him a chance, okay?” He asks, his eyes pleading as he nods down at you. “I think he really means to make up for it all.”
You seriously doubt that. But, you don’t voice that opinion.
“Fine,” you surrender, dropping your hands to your side. “But I’m allowed to laugh at him when this team kicks his arse. Which they will because he deserved it.”
Ted snorts at that, “don’t worry, Nate’s already got you beat on that front.”
Your eyes shift to said man, and he’s sending you a wide grin and a thumbs up in a way that makes you chuckle despite how truly unhappy you were with Jamie only a few feet away from you, on your team.
-
The only thing that had made practice somewhat bearable was seeing Jamie repeatedly knocked on his ass.
And then mocked by the rest of the team.
Truly, it brought a smile to your face.
You’re still laughing to yourself about it as you finish packing up your stuff in the office you shared with Nate. Him, Ted, Beard and pretty much most of the team were already gone or on their way out the door, but you usually elected to stay a little longer than everyone else trying to come up with new gaming strategies, plays and honestly, team bonding exercises since you found it incredibly important that the team genuinely care for one another if they were going to play on a team together.
You’re just sliding your laptop into your bag when a knock pulls you from your musings.
“Oh, Sam, just give me–”
Except, it isn’t Sam when you finally glance up. It’s Jamie.
You’re leaping to your feet before you can stop yourself, a surge of panic running through your body as your wide eyes meet his. He’s blinking back at you, as if as shocked by your reaction as you were, and before you know it you’re glancing around, half expecting Ted or Beard to be there because why else would Jamie be here?
But neither of them are there, of course, they’d left twenty minutes ago.
“Coach Lasso and Beard have already left,” you explain before he can say anything. “You’re gonna have to wait until tomorrow to talk to–”
Shaking his head, Jamie takes a step towards you. “I wasn’ lookin’ for them. I, uh… was lookin’ for you actually.”
You blink. Once, twice, before your brows furrow. “What?”
He steps towards you again, fully stepping into your office as he scratches at his face absentmindedly, looking just as uncomfortable as you felt. He glances around for a moment before his gaze focuses back on you, and the serious expression on his face is one you’re not used to or know how to react to so you continue to stare blankly at him.
“I wanted to, em, apologize, I guess? Actually, no, not I guess. I am sorry. And I want to apologize for how I treated ya in the past. You know, for all the shitty things I said and did.”
You must be dreaming.
Surely, you’re dreaming.
There’s no way that the Jamie Tartt, famed football star and resident asshole, is apologizing to you. Some random female assistant coach on a team he’d once laughed at for existing? Yeah. Not possible.
But… it’s either that or he’s taking the piss out of you.
Whatever it is, the shock fades in seconds and is quickly replaced by an indescribable amount of anger. 
Because, honestly? Screw him. Screw him for thinking he could walk in here, say sorry and it’d all be okay. After all that he did.
“You’re sorry?” You ask, pointing at him.
He nods, slowly. 
“That’s funny,” is what you end up saying, letting out a snort as he blinks at you in surprise. “You sure didn’t seem sorry all those times you laughed at me when I tried to coach you. What was it you used to say?” You quirk a brow at him as his face falls, the hopeful glint that you’d accept his apology fading from his eyes as you laugh at him. “Oh, that’s right! That I wasn’t meant to be a coach because I’m a woman and rather, I should just look pretty and help make you look good. And if it wasn’t you belittling me for my job, it was you trying to get in my pants and then laughing about it as if that’s some sort of joke.”
You finish your rant with a huff, shoulders rising and falling heavily as Jamie continues to stare back at you.
You hadn’t really realized how much his comments had truly hurt until that moment. Or, rather, you’d pushed them down so far to the back of your mind that it had been bubbling up until this very moment where he tries to apologize offhandedly like that was going to somehow make things better.
“I may have only known you for a little bit before you left us for Manchester, Jamie,” you add, voice considerably calmer as you frown at him. “But you sure left an impression. And one little apology is not gonna make up for the amount of times I went home crying and feeling worthless, because of you.”
Jamie doesn’t say anything. His lips part like he means to you, but he ends up just gaping at you like a goldfish, looking rather stupid, before there’s a light knock on the door and you’re pulled from your thoughts only to find Sam poking his head into the office. He looks concerned, eyeing Jamie out of the corner of his eye with a certain edge, before turning to you.
Biting your lip, you blink, hating the way your vision blurs and quickly you wipe at your face before any tears can fall.
You refused to cry in front of Jamie.
“Just a second, Sam,” you call, offering him a small, somewhat forced smile. You turn to your desk, grabbing your bag and doing a quick survey to make sure you hadn’t forgotten anything before promptly pushing your way past Jamie and slipping past Sam. He sets a hand on your back to guide you forward, blocking you from Jamie’s view and you don’t see it, but just before Sam turns to walk away himself, he’s sending Jamie a rather nasty glare.
The message is clear; leave her alone.
-
The next morning there’s a vase of flowers sitting on your desk.
Nate is eyeing them when you walk in, before he blinks at the sight of you and quickly turns away as if afraid you caught him staring. You just blink at him, before looking at the flowers once more.
Poking your head out to the main office, you gesture over your shoulder; “where’d the flowers come from?”
Beard raises his hands in a silent gesture that they’re not from him, before your gaze falls to Ted.
“Don’t look at me,” he shrugs. “You’d know if I got you flowers,” he winks with a light chuckle and rolling your eyes as you make your way to your desk. There’s a card in front of the vase and as you take a seat, you take the card, flipping it open.
All that’s written on it is the name of the flowers; Lily of the Valley.
Frowning, you let your eyes wander across the white flowers, leaning forward to smell them and letting your eyes fall shut at the sweet scent. 
Only thing is, who sent them?
Leaning back on your chair, you peek into the locker room, trying to see who of the players is there. There’s not too many. There’s Sam, but you walked in with him so you know it’s not him, also he most likely would’ve just given them to you if he was going to get you a bouquet of flowers. Isaac’s there, but you doubt he’d give them to you. Richard and Dani are there, but they're much too forward to try and secretly give you flowers.
And then your eyes fall on Jamie. He’s already looking at you, but he’s quick to glance away the second your eyes fall on him, his cheeks turning a bit red.
Your brows furrow.
It couldn’t–
“Apparently, Lily of the Valley symbolizes apology. Specifically when one doesn’t know how to apologize.” Nate explains, reading off of his phone, the card from your desk in his other hand, before he glances at you with a curious smile. “I wonder who wanted to apologize to you?”
You glance at Nate, before the flowers, before peeking back at Jamie who’s tying the laces of his boots, pointedly not glancing up.
Moving back towards your desk, you stare at the flowers a moment longer.
What the actual hell.
-
“Oh, just–”
Before you can properly register the voice, a blur of blue is suddenly in front of you, opening the door you’d been about to open yourself before your hand can even reach for the handle.
Slowly your eyes flicker upwards to fall on Jamie as he stands beside you, holding the door wide open, a rather proud smile plastered onto his face.
“There ya go,” he offers, head tilting towards the door. “Ladies first.”
Quirking a brow, you nod at Jamie slowly, stepping through the door while you try to fight the smile that threatens to curl onto your lips.
“Smooth, Tartt,” you offer over your shoulder.
He grins back at you, nodding at you.
You can’t help the laugh, however, when instead of stepping through the door like you expected (assuming he’d only done it cause he needed something from here in the first place), he lets the door shut with a goofy wave, leaving you alone in the room.
Pausing, you shake your head.
That was new.
-
“And you, Coach?”
It takes you half a second to realize Jamie is talking to you and you only really realize it because Ted, Beard and Nate are all looking at you, waiting.
Blinking, you swallow thickly, eyes falling back on the team only to see they’re all staring at you as well, also waiting. Your eyes fall on Jamie and he’s smiling at you, happy and all teeth as he rocks on his feet, patiently waiting for you to say anything you might or might not have to say.
It’s not like the rest of the team hadn’t ever asked you for your opinion or if you had any pointers. And of course Ted made sure to consistently ask for your suggestions, wanting to make sure you felt your voice was heard and included.
As the only female coach for a male’s football team, you’d managed to find yourself an incredible group of boys who listened to you despite your gender and actively made sure to try out anything you suggested.
But never had you ever had all their attention like you do in that moment. All of them just standing there, solely focused on you.
And that was because of Jamie.
Biting your lip, you shuffle on your feet. “Oh, well… I–”
But your voice is shaky and you’re not sure how to say what you want, but as your eyes flicker back over to Jamie he’s still grinning at you, smile never wavering and he’s sending you a thumbs up.
As if to say; you got this.
And then the words just seem to pour from your lips after that.
-
The addition of Roy Kent to the line up of coaches is both positive and negative.
And really, it isn’t negative for anyone but yourself. Not that having Roy on the team was negative, just, well… It was already hard enough being the only women assistant coach with two other men, but now you were competing with three men and Roy was nothing if not an intimidating and commandeering addition to the team.
His desk had been squished in between yours and Nate’s and while the man was lovely, if not a little aggressive, by the end of his first day you found yourself drained and feeling like a fool. Roy wasn’t just another man, but he was a previous football star himself; he had the on field experience to back up his suggestions and he knew what he was talking about so that when he did say something, no one really batted an eye to his suggestions.
Or, at least, questioned them.
Worst part was you liked Roy. Sure he swore a lot, and sometimes he’d grunt instead of replying to you but before he’d had to leave the team, he’d always listened to your suggestions with an open mind and never made you or the suggestions feel less just because it was a woman saying them. He was an absolute sweetheart underneath all of the gruff, and you knew him outside of work quite well as well because he was dating Keeley.
So, with the jealousy that you couldn’t help but have, you also felt extremely guilty. 
“Are… Are you alrigh’?”
Gasping, you sit up at the voice, panicked eyes glancing around until you settle on Jamie.
“Jesus, Tartt,” you breathe, pressing a hand to your chest as you shake your head. “You scared the shit out of me.”
“Sorry,” he offers with a light laugh. “I didn’ mean to.”
“It’s fine,” you sigh, letting yourself relax once more as you slump against the wall behind you, pulling your knees closer to yourself. “I just thought I was alone. Didn’t think anyone would come wandering in here.”
Jamie steps into the room at that, letting the door shut behind him as he nods. “Saw you come in ‘ere,” he explains, taking a seat across from you. “Wanted to make sure you were alrigh’”
Shaking your head, you brush him off; “I'm fine.”
“You, um… you sure?”
Turning to Jamie, he’s staring back at you in a way that tells you he doesn’t believe you. He’s got a concerned look in his eyes and he’s fidgeting with his fingers, his knee rocking nervously as he tries to find the words to say.
Sighing, you shake your head; “it’s stupid.”
“Not when it comes to ya.”
Blinking, you turn to Jamie, lips parted in surprise. Except, he doesn’t seem shocked by what he said or embarrassed. He continues to stare back at you with that concerned look in his gaze, patiently waiting for you to explain what’s going on.
“It’s just… It’s hard,” you start, struggling to find the words. How do you explain to him, not only a man but the same man that used to belittle you for the exact same thing you’re feeling self conscious about, that you feel like you’re being tested in your own job everyday just because you’re a woman? You weren’t sure he’d understand. And honestly, although you’ve seen the changes in him and regrettably started to believe them, you weren’t positive he wouldn’t just laugh at you for it anyways.
And yet, you continue to speak.
“Being what I am at my job,” you add, eyeing him carefully.
Jamie frowns. “Being a woman?”
Inhaling sharply, you nod; “yeah. I know Ted and the rest of the guys would never belittle me or make me feel less because I am, but… It’s just hard being the only woman coach for a team of men. Even if you guys don’t mean to, and I know you don’t, you all naturally gravitate towards Ted and the guys more than you do me.”
Lips parting, Jamie stares back at you.
Avoiding his gaze, you glance down at your lap. “Makes me doubt myself sometimes.”
“Oh.”
Nodding, you pull at a thread on your pants. “Yeah. Oh.”
Silence follows and you feel ten times more uncomfortable as the seconds pass. You can still feel Jamie’s gaze on you, watching, waiting, maybe trying to find something to say, and it’s making you feel more and more embarrassed as time goes. 
Shaking your head, you suddenly move to a stand.
“Anyways, it’s late so you should–”
“I think yer an amazing coach.”
Lips left parted, you turn, only to find Jamie suddenly standing in front of you.
“You make great strategy plays, you are undeniably smart about the terminology and nobody cares about the wellbeing of the team more than you,” he continues, his gaze never once faltering. “You cheer us on and never ever make us feel like we’re doing something wrong or stupid for askin’ for help. I know it feels like we listen to the guys more, but every single one of us leans on your advice heavily and we’d be lost without yer support and guidance.”
Eyes widening, you don’t realize it until you blink that you’re crying.
Your hand falls to your cheek, feeling wetness.
“Shit,” Jamie curses and your eyes fall back on him. “I didn’t mean to make ya cry, I just–”
Your arms wound around him before he can finish, pulling him flush against you as you press your head into the crook of his neck. Jamie freezes at the touch, body tensing but just for a second before he eases, his own arms coming around to wrap around you in return.
“Thank you,” you whisper to him, “I… Thank you so much.”
“O-Of course,” he murmurs, voice low and you can feel his chest rumble against your cheek. “I just… thought ya should know.”
Biting your lip, you pull back at that, quickly wiping the tears off your cheeks as you step away from him. Jamie lets you go with ease, both of your cheeks red, yours burning when you realize you’d not only just flung yourself at him but you’d gotten his shirt wet with your tears.
“I.. I’m sorry,” you whisper, gesturing to his chest. “I didn’t mean to cry on you.”
Jamie shrugs; “no worries, love.”
Meeting his eyes, the two of you stare at each other for a moment, before you’re quickly stepping past him. “Anyways, I should… I should go.”
“Oh. Oh, yeah. Me… Me too.”
Reaching for the door, you glance back at him; “I’ll see you tomorrow?”
Nodding, Jamie grins down at you; “see you tomorrow.”
-
“We’ve got a problem.”
Both Keeley and Rebecca turn to you at your words, whatever they’d been saying promptly getting cut off the second they see the panic on your face.
Rushing you inside, they settle on either side of you on Rebecca’s couch in her office, Keeley’s arm wrapped around your waist and Rebecca offering you a cup of tea as they turn to you with concerned eyes.
“Okay, lay it out,” Rebecca says, “what’s wrong and who do I have to fire?”
Letting out a light laugh, you shake your head. “You don’t have to fire anyone.”
“Good,” she nods, “because I didn’t want to fire anyone.”
Rolling your eyes teasingly, you take a sip of your tea before reaching forward to set it on the table.
“Okay, then, babes,” Keeley speaks up, frowning at you, “then what’s the matter? You came in here looking like something horrible’s happened.”
Letting out a groan, you press your hands to your face; “that’s because something horrible has happened.”
“What?” Keeley presses, squeezing your arm.
Taking a deep breath, you hesitate a moment, eyeing the both of them, before you whisper in shame; “I think I fancy Jamie.”
There’s a beat of silence, before;
“Like Tartt?” Keeley asks, eyes widening in absolute surprise. “Jamie Tartt? Our Jamie Tartt?”
“Like on my team Richmond, Jamie Tartt?” Rebecca adds, pointing at herself before gesturing to her office.
Cheeks burning, you hide your face in your hands again. “Yes.”
Keeley and Rebecca eye each other for a moment, before Rebecca’s pulling your hands away from your face.
“Y/N.”
You just shake your head, trying to grab a pillow to further hide yourself.
“Babes, stop,” Keeley laughs lightly. “Explain to us why you fancy Jamie.”
“Yeah,” Rebecca encourages. “It’s alright.”
Hands falling to your lap with a huff, you frown. “It’s all his fault,” you whine. “Because he’s trying to be better now and I can’t handle that. Before, you know, when he was a prick, that’s just it! He was a prick. And I’m sorry Keeley for saying this but I always found him a little attractive.”
Snorting, Keeley shakes his head; “babes, why do you think I dated him?”
Biting your lip, you sigh. “But he was awful, right?” She nods and Rebecca snorts, clearly feeling that’s an understatement. “And when he came back, I was so mad. Mad because he was so mean and laughed at me and belittled me for being a woman, and not to mention he was terrible to the whole team. Like when he used to bully Nate or hog the ball and never give Sam a chance to show his skill.”
They both nod to your words.
“So I was upset. Upset because he was back and because Ted didn’t tell me or ask me how I felt. And I said to myself that this whole apology thing was just an act and he’d go right back to being his old self in a few days. I was proud of myself too because when he tried to apologize, I didn’t let him.” Keeley squeezes your arm at that and Rebecca smiles proudly. “But then the next day I came in and he bought my flowers!”
Their eyes widen.
“He did?”
“Yeah,” you nod at Keeley. “A big bouquet of Lily of the Valley and you know what Lily of the Valley symbolizes?”
Keeley shakes her head and Rebecca sighs, shoulders falling. “Apology,” she explains for you. “You give them to someone you hurt and don’t know how to apologize to.”
Keeley’s lips part in disbelief; “I never got fucking Lily of the Valley’s.”
Sinking into the couch, you cry out; “exactly! And then he starts opening doors for me and helping me pack things up… he’s listening to me in practice when he never used to, deliberately asking for my opinion after practice after the rest of the coaches have said their pieces. He tells the rest of the team to shut up if he feels they’re not listening to me and he asks me for pointers alone so he can get better. And! God! I was upset and he made this whole big speech about how amazing a coach I am and how the team appreciates me and shit and then I hugged him and cried on him and he didn’t laugh at me or make me feel like shit. He… he was actually really fucking sweet.”
The second you’re done ranting, Keeley and Rebecca glance at each other, before coming to the same conclusion.
“Well,” Keeley says hesitantly. “It definitely sounds like you fancy him.”
Pulling at your hair, you let out a cry. 
“No, no,” Rebecca shakes her hand, pulling your hands away from your face and holding them safely in her own. “It’s fine, love. Jamie has really turned himself around.”
“He has,” Keeley is quick to agree. “I mean, he never did any of that stuff for me and we were already in a relationship.”
“But it isn’t fine,” you argue, shaking your head. “Because he’s Jamie Tartt, and he’s fucking fit and now he’s nice too… and he’s a star football player and I’m just Y/N Y/L/N, some random assistant female coach on a team of male football players. No one knows me and I’m not special and I’m not a model or a celebrity or any of the usual types he goes for.”
“That is absolutely not true,” Rebecca says instantly, face appalled as if she can’t believe you’ve just said what you have.
“You are Y/N fucking Y/L/N.” Keeley adds, moving to grip your cheeks tightly between her hands. “The first and only female assistant coach of Richmond who has come up with more strategy plays that have helped us win than anyone else. Not to mention, you are proper fit. You are an absolutely fucking gorgeous and successful woman that Jamie would be incredibly lucky to have.”
Lips parting, you blink. Keeley and Rebecca are both looking at you in a way that leaves no room for arguments and feeling your eyes water, you pout; “you mean that?”
“Of course I fucking mean that.”
“Y/N,” Rebecca calls, squeezing your hands tightly. “I am so proud of you and the woman that you are and incredibly lucky to have you as a coach for my team. I know that, Keeley knows that, the team knows that and it looks like Jamie is aware of that more than anyone else. I know it’s hard to leave yourself vulnerable like this, but at least give him a shot.”
Biting your lip, you meet her eyes, finding the reassurance in them you needed before you glance over at Keeley who is grinning widely, nodding.
“Okay,” you whisper. “Okay.”
-
You’d believed what Rebecca and Keeley said.
Of course you did because you know they’d never lie to you.
And you’d promised them you’d give Jamie a chance before simply believing there’s no way he’d like you. But promising and doing was a lot different, and it’s hard to find the chance to say anything to him over the next few days.
The whole team is anxious because of the game against Manchester City coming up, especially since the last time they’d played them, it was the match that had gotten them regulated. Adding even more to that, Jamie had been on the Manchester team when that had happened and even though you know he’d made great strides towards making up with the team since coming back to Richmond, he was just anxious as the rest of them.
For a multitude of reasons you didn’t understand.
So, there wasn’t a chance to say anything.
And there certainly wasn’t one now that they’d lost. You’d briefly wondered to yourself that if they won, maybe you could run to Jamie and just confess your feelings then, thick in the adrenaline of it all. Like they did in the movies. All sweet and romantic.
Only, Richmond hadn’t won and you certainly weren’t going to now.
Especially when you were just as disappointed as the rest of them.
You’re speaking with Ted and Roy in the locker room when Jamie’s father comes in, and any conversation you’d been having falls silent the second he does.
You watch in stunned silence as Jamie’s father makes an embarrassment of himself, laughing and joking as he makes fun of the team's loss before zeroing in on Jamie himself. He says the cruelest things, and everything clicks in that moment why Jamie was the way that he was before he’d left Richmond.
And when Jamie punches his father straight across the face, you jump and your hands fall to your lips but you’re not shocked and you don’t think Jamie is wrong either.
No one says anything and no one does anything as Beard drag’s Jamie’s father out of the locker room and Jamie stands there, still standing in a defensive position. You want to do something, you want to say something, but you don’t think it’s your place. And you don’t know if Jamie would even feel all that much comfort with having you do anything.
Roy steps past you in the next second, taking Jamie into his arms and he loses it then, his sobs echoing throughout the otherwise silent room.
Ted runs past you at one point, but you don’t notice, eyes stuck on that of Jamie and Roy.
Then, Roy’s pulling away, but Jamie’s still got tears in his eyes, pressing his hand to his eyes as he tries to hide away. Suddenly, Roy’s eyes are on you, and he’s smiling in a knowing way, before promptly kicking everyone else out of the room. Your eyes widen as he does, body tensing in panic as Roy nods at you just before shutting the door behind him, leaving just you and Jamie in the room alone.
You can hear him sniffling to himself, a small sob breaking past his lips as you stand there, feeling out of place and like you’re stepping past his boundaries. So, slowly, you step towards him. “I can, uh, leave too if you’d like some–”
“No,” is all Jamie says before he’s pulling you into a hug, arms wrapping around you tightly as he presses his face into the crook of your neck. You freeze at the action at first, unsure what to do or say, before slowly your body eases, and your arms are raising, hands falling to his back as you squeeze him tightly.
He clutches onto you, sobbing into your neck, and you let him wordlessly, rubbing his back in smooth, slow patterns in a way you hope is comforting.
And the two of you stay like that for a while.
-
Your relationship from then on changes.
More than it already had.
You find yourself willingly hanging out with him when you would’ve avoided it otherwise before. Jamie always seems to be there, lending a helping hand or letting you talk his ear off about something or another.
The two of you never really spoke about what had happened in that locker room but you didn’t need to. It went without saying. You understood Jamie in a way that you hadn’t before, and although it didn’t excuse it, it made sense why he’d been the way had been before and it showed him trying to be better meant a lot more than it had before.
So, the season ends, and you watch the changes Jamie’s doing with a smile and a completely different attitude. When he gives Dani the shot, or when he joins in on team chants before matches. He’s still arrogant and cocky, but it’s in a more loveable way than it had been before, and now when he comes in every morning wearing his stupid ICON hat and dumb sunglasses, you can barely hide the smile that curls onto your lips.
Or the way that despite him wearing such stupid things, you think he looks ridiculously hot.
The season ends and then the new one starts up with one less coach after Nate had left only to join West Ham. It had certainly been a betrayal and you’d be lying if you said it hadn’t hurt. You’d always felt like Nate had understood you in a way maybe some of the others didn’t and the two of you had shared that office alone for so long that you couldn’t help the way you’d cried when you’d realized what he’d done.
Jamie holds you through it. 
A soft, gentle and comforting presence that never makes you feel silly for feeling so hurt and betrayed and for that, you’re eternally grateful.
Suddenly, Jamie is someone you can’t live without. You look forward to every morning you see him walk into the locker room, and you find yourself texting him at night, unable to stop the giddy feeling that floods you every time you hear your phone ding and see it’s him calling or texting you.
Keeley and Rebecca tease you all whilst constantly trying to get you to confess. You always say that you will, but you never do.
You’re mad for him, that you know but you don’t know if he’s mad for you and you don’t want to ruin the relationship the two of you have built just because of your stupid feelings. It was nice having him as a friend, and although every time you saw him you just wanted to kiss him, you didn’t want to lose that friendship either.
So you never say anything.
-
“So, I would suggest just–”
“Y/N–?”
Lips left parted at the sound of Sam, you turn to him as he pokes his head into the office. He freezes when he sees Jamie standing behind you, the two of you going over one of his plays, your hand left held with the whiteboard marker and he winces. “I’m so sorry. I did not mean to interrupt you two.”
Jamie is waving his hand in reassurance as you smile at Sam, letting your hand fall; “it’s fine, Sam. What’s up?”
“I just wanted to let you know that I won’t be able to drive you home tonight,” he explains, chancing a quick glance at Jamie before focusing back on you. “I have to run by the restaurant before heading home and I’m not sure how long it will take.”
“Oh,” you blink, shaking your head. “It’s fine, Sam. I can walk home tonight. It’s no problem.” Then, cheekily, you can’t help but add; “as long as when you finally do let me see your restaurant, everything is on the house.”
Laughing, Sam shakes his head; “it already was. And for you,” he points at you with a grin, “it’ll always be.”
Smilingly, you nod, waving him goodbye as he does the same, slipping out of the office. You laugh quietly to yourself as he does, before turning to find Jamie’s eyes on you, and you blink; “sorry,” you offer bashfully. “Where were we–”
“I didn’t know Sam drove you home?”
Pausing, you shift back to face Jamie. “Oh, yeah. He saw that I was walking home one night, offered me a drive and it’s been like that since.”
Jamie nods, slowly. “You two are close.”
“Um, yeah?” You agree with a shrug. “Sam is easy to talk to, I guess. Super friendly and kind.”
“Hm,” Jamie hums lightly. “He does look like he’d make a good boyfriend.”
It takes you half a second to register what Jamie’s said both because you feel that’s a weird observation for Jamie to make and also because when in that conversation did you say he was your boyfriend?
“We’re not dating,” you explain, shaking your head as you laugh. “We’re just friends.”
Jamie’s eyes widen, cheeks warming in faint embarrassment but… is that a hint of relief you see? Probably not, you’re just psyching yourself out.
“Oh.”
Nodding, you bite your lip; “yeah.”
“Cool,” Jamie hums and you raise a brow at him, before turning back to the whiteboard.
“Did you wanna…?”
Jamie is quick to agree, shifting on his feet to put his focus back on what you were saying before Sam had stepped in. But then, just as your lips part to continue, Jamie is interrupting you;
“I could drive you home.”
He says it so nonchalantly you think you imagine him saying it at first.
You glance at him over your shoulder, and he turns to you.
“If you’d like.”
“Um,” and you hate the way your voice shakes or the nerves that rattle your entire being. “Sure… Sure, that’d… that’d be great. If you don’t mind?”
“Not at all,” he assures with a grin. “Why would I mind having a pretty girl in me car?”
Cheeks burning you quickly glance back ahead of yourself to not let him see how much that simple comment made your heart flutter and your insides feel like jelly. Inhaling sharply, it’s hard to fight the smile from curling onto your lips as you move to continue saying what you’d been trying to say before.
You’re so focused that you don’t see Jamie watching you, a grin curling onto his own lips when he sees how flustered you are.
-
“Pretty coach.”
Halting in your step, you glance up, only to have to crane your head upwards when you find Zava, the star player Rebecca had managed to score, staring down at you. He’s tall, very tall, and you’re not exactly sure why he’s here, in the middle of the hall, or why he’s talking to you.
“Zava,” you greet nervously, offering a small smile.
He’s stepping towards you, effectively closing the distance between you as your eyes widen, freezing when he reaches forward to take your hand in his own. Before you know it, he’s pressing his lips against the top of your hand, a gentle, swift kiss as he glances at you through his lashes, smirking.
“I look forward to working under you as my coach,” he explains, accent thick as he pulls his lips away. It doesn’t escape your notice that he doesn’t let go of your hand, though.
“Oh, um, me–me too. But you’ll mainly be working under Coach Lasso since he’s the head–...”
Your words trail when you realize he’s not really listening. He’s just… staring. Directly at you.
Swallowing thickly, with your free hand, you touch your face; “is there something on my–”
“Oh no, no,” he laughs gently, squeezing your hand. “You just have the most beautiful eyes.”
Feeling yourself warm, you meet his eyes in surprise before glancing down at your feet, “oh, um, thank–”
“Oi.”
The new voice is sharp and your head is spinning over your shoulder only to see Jamie promptly making his way over to you. You’re surprised by how angry he looks, but his attention isn’t focused on you and rather Zava as he quickly makes his way over, pulling your hand out of Zava’s and gently pushing you behind him as he blocks you from sight from Zava. You flush when you realize Jamie’s still holding onto your hand, before slowly peeking over his shoulder.
“Tartt,” Zava grins, “it’s wonderful to see you.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Jamie huffs. “Just keep your hands to yourself, okay?”
Raising his hands in surrender, Zava laughs, stepping back as he moves to walk away. His eyes catch yours and he winks at you before turning to walk off.
“Prick.” Jamie hisses under his breath.
You pause at that, turning to him only to see his eyes set in a glare, watching Zava disappear down the hall before you let out a giggle. Jamie’s eyes fall on you the second you do, gaze softening when he sees you giggling.
“What?”
“Nothing,” you smile, biting your lip as you glance up at him. “Just funny. You're calling him a prick.”
Jamie’s eyes widen in mock hurt; “he is!”
“Sure,” you shrug. “And so were you.”
“But not anymore,” he teases, rolling his eyes at you.
“True,” you agree, shocking him by how easily you do. You just continue to smile at him, “definitely not anymore.”
Jamie stares down at you, eyes never leaving your face. “He’s right about one thing, though.”
Quirking a brow, you tilt your head; “yeah? And what’s that?”
“You do have the most beautiful eyes.”
That was the last thing you expected.
Lips parting, you’re burning red as you promptly slap Jamie in the arm.
“Ow!” He hisses, pulling away as his hand (regrettably) leaves yours. “What was that for?”
You just stare back at him, pouting, embarrassed, hoping he can’t hear how fast your heart is beating.
Or notice that the way he said it meant way more than it did coming from Zava.
“Prick.”
Jamie just blinks, pouting; “what did I do?”
-
You let out a laugh as Jamie comes running up on the bus cheering about seeing Windmills, shaking your head with a grin as the rest of the guys cheer him on.
He walks down the aisle, high fiving a few of the guys until his eyes settle on you. Leaning your head against the seat, you grin cheekily up at him. “Did you have a fun night?” You ask with a head tilt, biting the inside of your cheek.
Smiling down at you, Jaime nods; “yeah, you?”
“Perfect,” you assure. “Spent a quiet night in my room.”
“The boys didn’t keep ya company?” He frowns, and he looks like he’s about to say something before you quickly reach forward, grabbing his wrist.
“That was team bonding stuff, silly,” you roll your eyes. “Besides, I had the most relaxing bath. It was fine.”
He glances down at you, not saying anything, but you feel your chest tighten when you see the way his eyes glance across your entire figure at the word bath.
Ignoring the butterflies, you smile; “saved you a seat, see?” You gesture to the empty window seat next to you, and Jamie laughs.
“You want the window seat?”
“Yup,” you grin, shuffling over to the other side as Jamie takes your old spot. You settle down next to him, arm brushing against his as he grins over at you.
“You got lots of training done last night?”
Jamie nods, “yup. Taugh’ Roy how to ride a bike.”
Brows furrowing, you briefly wonder how that happened in the midst of training but you let it go all the same, shrugging as you laugh. “But you made sure to get some rest, yes?” You add, turning to him with a quirked brow. “Because you remember what I said about training? If you push yourself too hard, you’re not going–”
“–to help anyone,” he finishes for you with a chuckle. “Yes, I remember.”
“Good,” you nod, squeezing his arm. 
“And you?”
Blinking, you turn to him.
“Did you get some rest last night?”
You nod, touched by his concern. “Yeah,” you assure, “like I said, spent the night in my room, resting.”
“Good,” he repeats your words from earlier and you turn your head away to the window when you feel yourself smiling.
Yet, despite that, an hour later, you’ve passed out on Jamie’s very own shoulder, softly snoring away.
Jamie is careful not to move, not wanting to wake you up, but when Dani turns to take a photo excitedly, he doesn’t stop him.
“Hey,” he whispers to Dani, “send that to me, okay?”
-
“You need to talk to Jamie.”
Raising a brow, you glance up at Roy.
“...I do?”
“He’s a mess,” is all Roy says.
“Okay…?”
“And you need to talk to him.”
Biting your lip, you hum; “because?”
Huffing, Roy rolls his eyes like you’re the one being annoying. “Because you’re the only one he’ll listen to, so you need to talk to him and get him out of whatever funk he’s in.”
“Okay,” you nod, “I’ll talk to him.”
-
You don’t get the chance to talk to him until you’ve arrived at the hotel the night before the game and even then it’s not really you talking to him.
The movie you’d all watched together is over and Ted had set a curfew but Jamie is taking your hand in his, throwing his hood up and leading you out of the hotel without another word. You glance over your shoulder to see Roy glancing at you in confusion, but you just shrug your shoulders and then Keeley is sending you two thumbs up with a bright grin and before you know it, you both are out the hotel and making your way across the street.
You let him lead, expecting him to say something, but he never really does. He’s eerily silent the entire walk, and it isn't until twenty minutes have passed that you finally tug on his grip and pull him to a stop. He glances back at you in surprise but you’re just shaking your head up at him, confused.
“If this is your way of getting me alone to murder me, I’m going to be really upset.”
He blinks at your words, confused at first, before he shakes his head. “No, no… of course not. I… I want you to meet someone.”
“Oh,” you mumble, feeling yourself ease as you meet his gaze. He’s staring back at you, obviously waiting for you to agree and with a gentle smile, you nod.
“Okay.”
It’s his mom.
He wanted you to meet his mom. 
You’re confused, extremely so, as Jamie leads you up the steps to a house, knocks and some older gentleman opens the door. He recognizes Jamie and invites the both of you in, and you’re left standing in the entrance way, baffled as you hug your coat closer to yourself, until a woman comes running down the stairs, screaming Jamie’s name and then suddenly she’s in his arms and he’s spinning her and calling her ‘mommy’ and it all clicks.
You can't help the smile that curls onto your lips at the sight, feeling like you’re being allowed to see a side of Jamie others rarely were.
And when Jamie introduces you to his mom, the smile turns into shock when she says; “you’re the one Jamie’s told me so much about!” And before you even have time to register those words or see Jamie glancing at you, she’s wrapping you up in her arms and hugging you so tightly as she gushes about how much she’s wanted to meet you.
You spend the night being welcomed by his mother and her boyfriend, before you leave Jamie to have his much needed conversation with his mom. Simon shows you around the house, before leaving you to glance around Jamie’s childhood bedroom yourself. You all but squeal at his Roy Kent poster, before rolling your eyes at Keeley’s, but happily glance round the rest of the room. You look at all his trophies and childhood photos, little drawings he’d done or books he’d read.
Before you know it, Jamie’s poking his head into the room and calling for you.
“Oh, Jamie,” you smile, “are you all done catching up with your mom?”
He nods, “yeah, you wanna get out of here? Go back to the hotel?”
“Sure,” you agree with ease, stepping toward him. He sets his hand against your back, leading you back towards the door where you say your final goodbyes. You thank Simon for the tour and give Georgie a huge hug, expressing how happy you were to meet her before she makes you promise you’ll come by and visit again.
You’re not quite sure how to reply to that, but it’s okay because Jamie does it for you, promising the two of you will stop by for an actual dinner soon.
And then, it’s just the two of you, making your way back to the hotel.
“So,” you call out, glancing at him from the corner of your eye. “You told your mum about me?”
Jamie rolls his eyes at that, huffing. “Of course I did. Why wouldn’t I?”
That certainly isn’t the response you were expecting, so, with warm cheeks, you glance at your feet.
“Got it all sorted now?”
Jamie hums, “yup. Sorry if I worried ya.”
You shake your head. “Think you had Roy in more of a panic, if I’m being honest. Poor man couldn’t breathe, he was so worried.”
Jamie snorts at that, lightly nudging you with his arm. “So, ya weren’ worried at all?”
Turning your head, your smile fades as you meet his gaze. “No, I was. I just didn’t want to overstep.”
“You could never overstep,” Jamie assures, “I should’ve been open about how I was feelin’. Just needed to sort it out for meself.”
Smiling softly to yourself, you hug your hands behind your back. “Well, I’m glad you figured it all out, Jamie. Really. Now you can kick some serious ass tomorrow, yeah?” You’re smiling as you say it, nudging him back with your own arm as the two of you continue to walk.
Then, suddenly, Jamie stops.
Frowning, you glance back at him; “are you–?”
“Me mum helped me with somethin’ else.”
“Oh,” you mumble, not sure where he was going with this. “What’s that?”
“Said I should stop being such a pussy and tell you how I really feel.”
Lips parting, you freeze. “Oh.”
Jamie nods, slow, and you can tell he’s nervous by the way he’s shuffling on his feet. “So… here goes.”
Your eyes widen when he steps forward, closing the distance between the two of you until he’s right in front of you, inches away. Your eyes follow him, head tilted back as you stare up at him, unsure what to do or say. But you don’t need to, because Jamie is speaking up in the next second.
“I’m in love with ya,” he confesses, letting the words just slip past his lips. “I’ve been in love with ya since you hugged me after me dad in Wembley. Maybe before that, I dunno. All I know is that when I came back to Richmond, all I was focused on was makin’ everyone like me again and then you yelled at me that day in yer office and I realized it was more than that. It wasn’t just about makin’ people like me, but makin’ up for the cruel things I'd done. I’m so sorry for the way I treated ya before, but I want you to know that I think the absolute world of ya. You are kind and sweet and smart and proper fit and… I dunno, you might not feel the same but I don’t wanna go on another day not having you know how crazy I am for ya.”
His words settle, carry on in the silence, as you stare back up at him, lips left parted, disbelief coursing through your veins.
Jamie’s confidence wavers as the silence carries and he’s shuffling on his feet in worry as he swallows thickly. “You don’t have to say anythin’,” he assures, rambling now with nerves. “I just wanted ya to know, so–”
But you cut him off by pressing your lips firmly against his own.
Jamie stumbles back from the pure force of the kiss at first, before he catches his balance and the shock fades and his hands are falling on your waist as he squeezes, returning the kiss with just as much passion. Maybe more. He kisses you like he’s been waiting to do this for weeks, and you realize, he maybe has. He holds you like you're the only thing in that moment that matters and you let yourself sink into his touch, turning to putty in his hands as you thread your fingers through his hair.
Then, slowly, you pull away, breathless as he smiles down at you.
“I love you too,” you whisper, “since the day you left me those flowers.”
Jamie’s eyes widen and his lips part but you don’t have the care to be embarrassed by your confession; it just felt good to finally, finally be able to say the words out loud.
“And I am so excited to see you kick ass tomorrow.” You breathe out, pressing your hands to his cheeks as you smile up at him, eyes dazed and sparkling with delight. 
Pressing his forehead against yours, Jamie presses a gentle kiss to your lips.
“And I can’t wait to see you kick ass tomorrow.”
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navybrat817 · 1 month
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Hold You Tight: Part 7
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Pairing: Club Owner!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader
Fic Summary: The owner of The 107th wants you to be his girl whether you like it or not.
Part 6 | Series Masterlist | Part 8
Chapter Summary: You meet some of the staff at the club and try to reason with one of Bucky's men about your situation.
Chapter Word Count: Over 4.3k
Chapter Warnings: DARK AU, tension, mention of stalking, inner conflict, insecurities, manipulation, possessiveness, flirting, Bucky Barnes (he's a warning, okay?), more warnings to come.
A/N: More Hold You Tight! Hope you lovelies continue to enjoy. Bucky edit by the beautiful @nixakimbo . ❤️ Beta read by the lovely @whisperlullaby , but any and all mistakes are my own. Divider by the talented @firefly-graphics . Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!
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You weren't sure exactly how far the club was from the bookstore, but you didn't say anything for a minute after his declaration. You’d read stories about instalove before, the accelerated trajectory of feelings and relationships. It wasn't something you thought you’d ever be on the receiving end of. That mixed with a dark antihero.
How was this your life?
Bucky chose to break the silence. “You can change here if you want.”
Your heart rate spiked as you stared at the garment bag. There was a chance that the dress was to your liking, your style. But in the car, it wasn't like you could shield yourself if you undressed. He’d see you. Maybe even try to touch you. Was it worth the risk?
Reaching for it, you took a deep breath and curled your fingers around the hanger. The moment you grabbed it though, you set it right back on the hook. You wouldn't bother unzipping it to take a look. You weren't a doll for him to play dress up with.
“Sorry, Bucky,” you began, shifting to face him. “I’m sure it’s a nice dress, but I'm not wearing it.”
“You sure?” He asked. “You haven’t even seen it.”
“I don't need to see it. You got your way about me going to the club and I think it's fair I get my way about the outfit,” you said. “We both know I could've met your friends another time. It didn't have to be tonight. So they'll meet me like this or not at all."
His eyes snapped to you, pinning you in place as you froze. Giving him an ultimatum over something he may consider trivial wasn't a smart move and it wouldn't be a hill you'd die on, but you needed some sort of win. Part of him had to understand that.
Bucky's lips curled in a small smile, but you still swallowed nervously. “You look stunning to me just as you are,” he said, tracing the collar of your shirt with his fingertip. "Perfect even.”
“What?” You asked. You were far from stunning. “You're really okay with me going into your club like this? I don't think it meets the dress code.” You were lucky your black dress was nice enough to get in the first time.
“And? I said in the bookstore that you can wear whatever you want since you look beautiful in anything, so of course I’m okay with it,” he said, his finger gliding down the middle of your chest. “If you're worried about anyone saying anything, don't be. You’re my girl and my friends and I will shut anyone up who tries to make you feel less than perfect.”
Your eyes widened at the casualness of the threat. There was no reason to threaten anyone on your behalf. You could also hear Marc's voice in the back of your mind, reminding you that Bucky was dangerous. “Bucky, you don't have to do anything.”
“If someone upsets or hurts you, yes, I do,” he said.
Addison was the type of person who would defend you if you were upset or hurt. You would do the same for her. A boyfriend type defending you was entirely different. He could've just said that to make you lower your guard or play on your insecurities. So why did it still sound like he meant it?
You gripped his wrist before his touch could move further down your body. “What if you upset or hurt me?” You asked.
Bucky blinked at your question, an unfathomable look in his eyes. “I promised I’d never hurt you,” he whispered. You were the only one safe from his underlying rage, weren't you? Because something was lurking beneath the surface that you hadn't yet witnessed. “But I'd do whatever I could to make you happy again if I upset you.”
“You realize dragging me to your club didn't make me happy?”
“I didn't drag you. You got into the car with my help,” he teased. When you didn't smile, he sighed. “I'm sorry. You told me you wanted a quiet night and I pushed you to go anyway. I just got so excited for everyone to finally meet the girl of my dreams and…” He shook his head. “That doesn't matter. I should've listened.”
The apology sounded so sincere it threw you for a loop. If gaslighting was an Olympic sport, he could take the gold. Everything about the man had you second guessing just about everything. “I appreciate that,” you said, going with a safe response.
He smiled as the car rolled to a stop. “I’ll make it up to you,” he promised, his gloved hand taking yours.
You wouldn’t ask how he planned to do that. “Wait,” you said, pulling him back slightly before he could open the door. “Can we just sit here for a second?” You weren’t ready to go into the club. Maybe you could buy yourself another minute or two.
“You're stalling,” he smiled. You didn’t disagree. “We can't stall for too long. The longer we stay, the more it pushes back the evening and I promised you’d be in bed by 10.”
“I just want to talk for another minute. I still don’t feel like I know much about you.”
“Like what?” He asked.
“Things like your family? You said there was a story about your mom,” you said.
A swirl of emotions passed in his eyes, a range of sorrow to anger and even hope. “There is, but I want to tell you that story when it’s just us,” he said. Just the two of you. Alone together. “I will say though that the original club belonged to her before I turned it into The 107th. It helps keep part of her memory alive for me.”
“That’s a beautiful thing,” you said honestly. She clearly meant the world to him. “And your dad?”
“He deserved what he got,” he said, not an ounce of pity or sorrow in his voice.
“Oh.” There was no lost love there. You wouldn’t linger on the topic since that was likely another story for another time. “Can you tell me why your left hand is always covered? You said I'd never be a mistress, but are you covering up a wedding ring or something?”
The storm raged in his eyes again and you had to keep yourself from shrinking back when he wrapped a hand around your neck. Your heart pounded as he applied a light amount of pressure, but he didn't squeeze any further. Would anyone help you or care if you tried to scream? “Do you feel a ring beneath the leather?”
“No,” you whispered, your eyes shutting when he leaned in.
His breath fanned across your lips. “I told you before that you’re the only one I see,” he whispered. “So when I do wear a ring on that finger, it’ll be on our wedding day.”
You let out something like a whimper when his thumb rubbed along your pulse. While you wanted to stall before, the car now felt too small. Too hot. You wouldn't be able to breathe if you stayed in there much longer. “I think we waited long enough to go inside,” you whispered.
Both of you sighed when he let go of your neck. “I think we did, too,” he agreed, taking your hand again. “But before I forget, you owe me a picture of you since I found you.”
You glared at him since you hoped he’d forget about that, but he only smirked before he helped you out of the car. Parked right in front of the club, you nearly jumped when you saw Raymond standing close by, his gaze flickering between you and his boss. “Hey, Ray,” you said as Bucky pulled you along.
Raymond said your name in reply as he followed close. There were already a few people lined up to get in, but your attention was on the bright sign of The 107th. It welcomed you. Taunted you. You had a feeling you were going to become very familiar with the ins and outs of this place.
“Let’s go, Kotyonok,” Bucky whispered. You hadn't realized you stopped walking until he slipped his arm around your waist and guided you forward.
Bucky nodded to the doorman and walked tall with you beside him. Of course he wasn't nervous. He had no reason to be. This was one of his castles and he was the king. And he chose a peasant to be by his side. A peasant he wanted to make his queen.
The music vibrated through the floor as you went inside and bypassed the coat check. The sound grew louder as you approached the main floor and watched the crowd, all dressed to impres. The lights bathed everyone in red and it felt like you had walked into a sensual version of Hell. And Bucky, the devil of the establishment, tugged you closer by the waist, but he might as well have put a collar around your neck to show everyone that you were his pet.
“Breathe,” he said close to your ear, making it hard to exhale. You were out of your element, the territory somewhat terrifying since you weren't in the company of your friends this time around. At least your legs weren't shaking. “Would you like a drink?” He asked.
“Maybe later,” you replied over the music.
“Then let me introduce you to some of the staff. And don't worry. They know who you are,” he said. Before you could respond to that and ask what exactly they knew about you, he turned you back toward the way you came and waved a couple of men over. Your breath caught in your throat when they approached. Both wore a black top and pants and were as large as Bucky and looked just as dangerous.
“This is Ari,” Bucky said, nodding to the darker haired man who had a scowl on his handsome face. “And this is Jax.” The blonde smirked when you made eye contact with him. “They’re two of my best bouncers and they’ll help keep an eye on you when you're not with me.”
You scooted closer to Bucky on instinct when both of them stared at you, but you didn't lower your gaze. Their looks could never be as penetrating as the man who owned this place. “Keep an eye on me? Are you my babysitters?” You asked. Would they watch your every move, too, and report back to Bucky?
Ari didn't smile, but the scowl softened. Jax, however, chuckled. “Guess you could say that, but we don't mind,” he said, his grin flirty and eyes twinkling as your cheeks warmed. “It's a pleasure to finally meet you, darlin’.”
“Jax,” was the only thing Bucky said, his fingers digging a bit more into your side. Ray gave the bouncer a warning glance, too.
Jax shrugged. “Just being polite,” he smiled. The man likely had people hanging all over him during his shifts with his charm. He probably wouldn't have looked at you twice under normal circumstances, but you smiled back anyway.
“I appreciate the politeness,” you said.
Bucky’s eyes narrowed. “You’re not being polite. You're flirting with my girl,” he said to Jax, your smile falling immediately when the air around you thickened.
“Just being polite,” he said again, not at all bothered by the look his boss gave him.
“Nice to meet you,” Ari cut in, his voice deep and even. People probably hit on him, too. And as domineering as they were, you felt an odd sense of security.
“It’s nice to meet you both. Hopefully you won't have to babysit me too much,” you said, glancing at Bucky. His fingers were still digging into your side, his muscles tense. Was he jealous? “Breathe,” you urged, giving him the same instruction he gave you moments ago.
The bouncers each had a look of surprise on their faces when Bucky listened and slowly exhaled. “Okay. Thank you,” Ray said, gesturing for them to get back to work. “Boss?”
Bucky’s hold on your relaxed a bit. “Let’s introduce you to Hal and then we’ll go to my office,” he said.
“Office?”
“Quieter than the VIP section,” he explained.
You weren't sure if people recognized Bucky or if it was just the aura of power that he gave off, but people moved out of the way without prompting as he led you toward the bar. He smiled as he did so, completely at ease in his domain. “You know, I don't need babysitters,” you told him.
“You need people to look out for you, especially if you’re with me,” he said.
“Because you’re dangerous,” you said. You’d eventually have to find out why. “Once again, you aren't giving me a choice.”
“When it comes to your safety, I can't,” he stated unapologetically. You grit your teeth as he took you to the bar where a couple of bartenders were working. You didn't pay much attention to the guy at the other end since the one right in front of you had no shirt on, his toned torso on full display.
“This is Hal. Our top bartender.”
“Hey!” The bartender flipped his light brown hair back and flashed you a smile almost as bright as his tan. “It’s good to see you again.”
“Again?” You repeated, nodding as your mind flashed back to Addison’s bachelorette party. “That’s right. You gave my friend a shot before we went into the VIP section. You have a great memory.”
“I’m good with faces and you have a very pretty face,” he smiled.
The attention from his staff was dizzying. It wasn't anything you were used to. What was it going to be like when you met everyone else? You felt so lost.
“First Jax, now you,” Bucky muttered. For a split second, you thought he would try to cover your eyes. “Would you put your fucking shirt back on and stop hitting on my girl?”
“Oh, c’mon. I'll put it on after my shift. This is getting me tons of tips already and will only continue through peak time.” Hal winked at you and you tried to smother a laugh. Between Jax and Hal, you wondered if the two of them had a bet going to see who could make their boss snap. If so, they were brave.
“Bucky, I’m not looking at Hal’s abs,” you said.
The bartender snorted when his boss's eye twitched. “Just get back to work,” he grumbled, stepping a couple of feet away from you to speak to Ray.
“You can look. I won't tell,” Hal smiled, leaning on the bar. “Boss man said you’d make an appearance tonight.”
“And here I am,” you smiled, leaving out that it wasn't by choice.
“Is there anything I can get you? Your drinks are always on the house.”
“I’m fine for-” A man in a blue suit elbowed his way in before you could finish. “Excuse me.”
The guy sneered at you as he gave you a once over. “Ugly underdressed bitch,” he said, making you flinch before he snapped his fingers at Hal.
You glanced down at your clothes, your throat tight. You stubbornly refused to wear the dress Bucky got you on principle, but the jerk’s comment was another reminder that you didn’t belong there. What would prompt someone to be so rude?
“Hey!” The guy snapped at Hal again when he didn’t serve him right away.
The bartender smiled, but it didn't look right as he stood back to his full height. Had he heard what the guy said? “You know, it’s not nice to interrupt a lady, John. Maybe you should apologize.”
“Fuck that,” the guy, John apparently, scoffed. He must’ve frequented the place enough if Hal knew the guy's name and you weren't about to cause a scene. A complete stranger shouldn’t make you feel bad anyway.
Hal’s smile disappeared completely. “Do you know who she’s here with?”
“It’s okay, Hal. Thanks,” you said, your burning eyes on the floor as you moved back to Bucky’s side. You didn't want to be there. You didn’t belong there. Why couldn't you just-
“You okay, Kotyonok?” Bucky asked, lifting your chin with a look of concern. “What’s the matter? What happened?”
“Nothing. I’m fine,” you answered, giving him a tight-lipped smile. You just wanted the night to be over. “Can we go to your office, please?”
Bucky intently searched your face, something dark taking over his eyes as your heart raced. “Ray?”
“Boss?”
“Quick change of plans. You take her upstairs and wait outside my office,” he ordered, swiping his thumb along your cheek. “I think Hal and I need to have a quick chat before I join you.”
“Hal didn’t do anything,” you said quickly. He was a sweet guy from what you could tell and he didn’t need to be on the receiving end of Bucky’s anger for something insignificant.
“But someone did,” Bucky guessed, his eyes still dark when you didn’t deny it. “I’ll take care of it,” he promised, ushering you toward Ray.
“Bucky, it’s fine,” you said over your shoulder, but he had already waved Hal over to speak to him.
“This way, please,” Ray said, leading you away from the bar.
Before you knew it, he took you up a flight of stairs and down a corridor, the decor sleeker than the main floor. The closed double doors at the end of the hall you could only assume was Bucky’s office since Ray had you stop just outside of them. You took a breath and leaned against the wall. Though you could feel the beat of the music against your back, it was much quieter. Less crowded. You didn’t feel completely overwhelmed.
“What’s he going to do?”
“Depends on what or who upset you.”
“You’re my girl and my friends and I will shut anyone up who tries to make you feel less than perfect.
You took a moment to look at the bodyguard as he stood against the opposite wall. Stoic. Pristine. “What am I doing here, Ray?” You sighed. This wasn’t your scene. It wasn’t your world.
“Meeting some of the boss’s staff and friends,” he answered.
“That’s not what I meant. I meant… God, I don’t even know what I mean,” you groaned and wondered how long it would be before Bucky joined you. “But I don't belong here.”
“Yes, you do,” he said.
Why in the world would he think that? “How long have you worked for Bucky?” You asked. It wasn’t that you wanted to really talk, but you didn’t want to let your mind race while you waited.
“A few years now,” he replied.
“You’ve seen him date people then. Has he stalked any of his past girlfriends that you’re aware of or am I the unlucky one?” You asked. Bucky told you he tried to go the traditional dating route and that the last woman he saw tried to rob him.
“You’re the only person he has gone to extremes for,” Ray carefully answered.
“Extremes. You mean stalking,” you said. Did that make you feel better or worse that it was just you? “So, you’re fully aware that he stalked me. And that he plans to move me into his place.”
Ray gave you a single nod, though you wouldn’t say he looked proud. “I am.”
“Can you stop him?” Your stomach dropped when he shook his head. “Why not?”
“You can’t stop or delay the inevitable. He wants you and I’m afraid that’s that,” he said.
Incredulity crossed your face. He sounded like Bucky, but this was somehow worse. Did he not see that his inaction helped upheave your life? “Oh, it’s that simple, huh? Bucky wants me, so he gets me? Did you even try to stop him when he began to do ‘research’ on me?”
“No,” he stated. One simple word that held so much weight.
“What the hell?” Fury seared through you as you pushed yourself off the wall. “You didn’t think to step in and at least tell him, I don’t know, that stalking is crazy and wrong and illegal?!”
Ray blinked and pushed his glasses further up his nose. “You think he’d listen to me?”
Your fury didn’t dissipate, but you did step back. “Well. I assumed…”
“That what? That we’re friends? He may respect my opinion from time to time and he may consider me a friend, but he’s my employer first and will not hesitate to remind me of that,” he said, glancing down the hall. “And perhaps it is not my place to say so, but as wrong as it is this is the happiest I've ever seen him. You ground him.”
“So, as long as he’s happy, it doesn’t matter what he does?” You asked, feeling more hopeless by the second. “Why am I bothering? You don’t care.”
There was no reasoning with Bucky nor his men. At this point, you were going around in circles. It was exhausting.
Ray blinked again. “You assume I don't care because I’m not stopping him. His methods are unconventional, sure, but he just wanted your full attention.”
“There are other less creepy ways to get my attention.”
“Are there? You know what we found when we researched you?” He asked rhetorically. “You never go out. You're either home or at work. When you’re at work, you don't give a second glance to any of the men who come in. Where was he supposed to naturally meet you?”
“That doesn't…” Tears stung your eyes, but you refused to weep. Being a homebody shouldn’t be a tool to use against you or used as a means to manipulate you. “I went out with my friends. And he flat out said ‘where’s the fun in that’ when I asked why he didn't just ask me out. Stop making excuses for him.”
It was no wonder Bucky did whatever he wanted unchecked.
“You went out with friends who are all in relationships and aren't interested in meeting anyone. So you didn't go out of your way to meet others which no one is faulting you for. Breaking in was a bit much, but he was desperate and took drastic steps to get to and keep you,” he said. He spoke like it was natural, logical. “You're afraid. I know. But you’re the one in his eyes. If you try to run, we’ll be forced to catch you. Is that really what you want?”
Your hands shook. “I just want normalcy.” Was that so wrong?
“And you wanted someone to love you. So did he,” he said with more gentleness than you expected. “There’s always some madness in love.”
“And between love and madness lies obsession,” you said. That’s what Bucky was to you: obsessed. “Why am I the one? Why is he so desperate to have me?”
The bodyguard considered your question. “Does there have to be one reason? He has no family left. Work and friends can only take so much of the emptiness away,” he said, glancing down the hall again.
You bit your lip. “When you dug into my life, was there something specific that set me apart from anyone else he ever encountered? An incident or anything?”
Bucky convinced himself you were his soulmate, mind, body, heart, and soul. Ray stood across from you and stated he was happy since you were in his life, the happiest he had ever been. But why? Was the man obsessed simply because you were you or was there a piece of the puzzle you were missing?
“That’s not for me to tell, but I can say he’s devoted to you and you only.” He glanced down the hall again before he straightened up. Was there something for Bucky to tell you then? “Be angry with me if you wish, but know that I’m not just looking out for my boss now. I’m looking out for you, too. We all will.”
You heard Bucky’s footsteps as he walked toward you, but your eyes remained on his bodyguard. “Okay,” you whispered. Ray wasn’t going to help you any further. Not tonight.
Bucky stood in front of you, effectively blocking your view of Ray. “I hope I didn’t keep you waiting long.”
“I hope Hal isn’t in any sort of trouble,” you said.
Bucky gave you a wolfish smile, energy buzzing around him. “Not at all. In fact, I’m giving him a raise,” he said, slipping his arm back around you. What did the bartender tell him exactly and what did he do in response? “I do want to warn you before we go in, they may stare since they’re not used to meetings like this.”
“What, they’re not used to you having someone on your arm?” You asked. You found that hard to believe.
“They’re not used to me having someone I’d burn the world down for,” he said proudly, nodding for Ray to open the doors. “All you’d have to do is give me the match.”
“I’ll keep that in mind,” you said, gulping when you heard the chatter and laughter inside.
Once again, you were the lamb going into the lion’s den. But you could do this. You just had to mingle a bit longer and then you could go on your way. Bucky swore he’d have you home and you’d hold him to it.
The moment Bucky took you into the office, all conversations ceased. The men appeared relaxed, like they weren't aware of or didn’t care about the aura that surrounded the man beside you. He was right though. They all stared. Including a man with a pair of blue eyes you recognized.
The man who bought tulips from your shop.
“It’s good to see you again,” Steve smiled.
With a sinking heart, you began to accept that there really was no escaping Bucky Barnes.
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Sorry to cut this off before meeting the rest of the friends, but it was a natural stopping point. And we'll find out what happens to John in the next part. Love and thanks for reading! ❤️
Masterlist ⚓ Bucky Barnes Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi
762 notes · View notes
swe3tte4rs · 8 months
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" My mom is so beatiful! " - Batfamily x Model!Batmom headcanons
Request: Batmom headcanons where batmom’s a model & the coolest mom ever?
Author's note: Thank you anon 🫶! Here is my second request, so I hope you like it. I didn't know what to put for the title so I settled for this one.
And it will also take me a while to upload the Zatanna x reader oneshot 🤗.
Again I clarify that my main language is not English, so sorry for the spelling errors 😿.
TW: nothing!! Just fluff I think
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Nightwing / Dick Grayson
Since he met you, he was fascinated with your beauty and elegance.
He loved when you went to galas and you wrapped him up in your long elegant jacket while you picked him up in your arms and let him fall asleep like that.
Dick didn't miss any of your shows or commercials.
I bet he has your older shows saved on his computer.
A model and cool mother at the same time? Wow, Dick couldn't ask for more.
You are his only support, the only one who was there and loved him no matter what.
Dick will always ask your opinion about what he wears or what haircut he will get.
He goes crazy every time he hears someone say "Your mom is hot."
"It's not my fault that my mom loves me and yours didn't love you, fucking slu-"
I feels like he would play with you by imitating your walk just to annoy you.
Always showing off his mother, yesyesyes.
The YJ and Titans members would be very jealous of him; because you treat him very nicely and send him food, without saying that you drown your son with love.
Jason Todd / Red Hood
When he was Robin he was dwarf and plump. I and other people agree 😇
Jason loves the support you give him and keep giving him.
And he also loves your delicious food, he probably asks you to prepare some for him every time he goes out on patrol.
I just imagined him (when he was Robin) bringing you a bouquet of flowers bigger than him once you finish the show, seeing you with those beautiful and big eyes 😭
I bet he sometimes got scared when he saw your face on a commercial billboard.
And he keeps doing it, only he spits out whatever he's drinking when he sees you in TV. (Without him knowing that you participated as a model in X brand)
He loves and continues to love your attacks of kisses on his face.
Yes, he would also ask you for style advice, but only once a year, he is very proud when it comes to his clothing style.
"YOU SON OF A BITCH!! HOW DARE YOU HAVE A FUCKING POSTER OF MY MOM?!?!"
Damn Jason, your mom is a model, what do you want them to do?
Tim Drake / Red Robin
He has a love-hate relationship with your love attacks.
Tim, like his other siblings, would not miss any of your shows, or the parts in which you appear.
He would help Barbara to make sure no one wants to sabotage you at one of your shows.
If given the choice between your food or the support you give him, Tim would jump off a bridge. (jk)
"Bro, can you shut the fuck up and stop saying how beautiful my mom is? I already know that."
Tim gets embarrassed every time he is with his friends and you call him (by phone XD), because you start reminding him that he is very handsome and he need to eat something. But it irritates him more when his colleagues ask to talk to you.
Damian Wayne / Robin
I think he wouldn't care about your job
He's like, the most attached to you.
After your shows he would be attached to you like a flea.
Also at the galas.
Damian was surprised that you were so kind and loving towards him despite the things he said to you before him had that mother and son connection.
I think that at first Talia wouldn't like you, but after several talks with her and assuring her that you're not going to do anything to Damian, you could even be friends.
Oh yes, he wouldn't care about your love attacks, as long as it's not in front of his friends.
"Yes mom, yes I ate the food... Yes, I know you love me. *sighs* I love you too mommy..."
You're like Jon's second mom.
His favorite days are pool or beach days, he likes to enjoy the sea while spending time with his mom.
Cassandra Cain / Orphan
Cass is the vice president of your fan club.
Cass loves you infinitely.
She has an album full of photos of you and her after the shows.
She doesn't like the idea of you parading in swimsuits.
She would always ask you for clothing tips and advice.
Cass likes, loves, and admires having a mother who understands her and can be herself with her.
She wouldn't care if you show her love in public or private. She always gives you more love back!
Skincare routine between you and her.
You always make sure that she is fashionable but also has her own style.
She would have a lot of admiration for you.
I feel like she would hardly take any notice of "your mom is hot" because she thinks they are flattery.
But if they go overboard and insult you, Cass wouldn't hesitate to give them a good beating. Nobody messes with her mommy.
I think she would have you as her wallpaper. A photo of you and her on your birthday or on her birthday.
Stephanie Brown / Spoiler
She is the President of your fan club.
Throughout the parade she is like "how boring, I want to leave" until you finally appear, it doesn't matter if the outfit you wore is ugly, she would applaud you with all her might.
"WHY DID YOU AGREE TO DO A BIKINI COMMERCIAL?!?!"
I feel like she gets angry every time anyone tell her "she's super hot" (you), and Steph is like "the nosebleed I'm going to give you is going to be hot."
Every time she sleeps over at the mansion she joins you and Cass's skincare routines.
She loves you because every time you talk there is some laughter.
Steph appreciates and adores the support you give her as a mother figure.
You rarely have love attacks towards her.
But she adores them.
Every chance she would go shopping with you.
Duke thomas / The Signal
Just let me...
Duke is your photographer.
He had a hard time opening up to you at first, but you were just great and so sweet to him.
He doesn't react like his brothers do when they tell him "your mom is hot", rather he would feel uncomfortable.
Only if they insult you would he get serious.
He likes that you are always there to support him every time he goes out on patrol or comes back from patrol.
You and Duke's connection started when you tried to get him to distract himself from the harsh reality of his biological parents, like going to the park and all that.
He is embarrassed when you have your love attacks towards him. It doesn't matter if you are alone or in public, he will be embarrassed every time you have those love attacks.
I feel that when you go with him to buy clothes, you spend a lot of time because you can't decide what clothes to buy him.
But in the end you end up buying everything for him.
Barbara Gordon / Oracle
Yes, I added Barbara, okay?
In my AU there was no love affair between her and Bruce 😇
The one in charge of making sure everything goes well at the shows.
Sometimes she sees you as her mother, sister and best friend.
Barbara always sends you messages; according to her so as not to lose contact, which is a lie because you know it is purely on a whim.
I don't think you have love attacks with her, just a simple kiss on her cheek or forehead.
Although sometimes she envied the attention you gave to your children.
Barbara would value and care for you deeply.
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[You can add more headcanons if you like <3]
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pitchsidestories · 28 days
Text
when grumpy met sunshine II Kika Nazareth x Reader
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masterlist I word count: 2382
It was the first day of training after the summer vacation marking the start of pre-season. With the new players coming in on the one hand and on the other hand the familiar faces it almost felt like the beginning of a school year. Everyone was buzzing.  
One of the fresh signings approached you quickly once she recognized you, her face lit up with joy and excitement.
“Hi y/n, I love your playing style and can’t wait to play with you!”, Kika Nazareth greeted you. God how you hated that footballer and her stupid smile. Also how dare she is saying that after what happened a year ago.
“Uhu, sure. It seems like you forgot what you did during the Champions League group stage games.”, you answered coldly.
“Huh, what do you mean?”, the Portuguese woman frowned confused.
“Forget it.”, you waved it off and rushed off leaving a very bewildered Kika behind.
“Don’t take it personally she never forgets anything really. Come on you need to meet the rest of your new teammates.”, Mapi padded empathetically the shoulder of the young forward.
“But I don’t get it, Mapi. What did I ever do to her?”, the brunette asked the defender, while her brown eyes followed you across the room. S
he was genuinely excited to play with you, if you hadn’t stopped her so abruptly the Portuguese might have said even more. How Kika loved the way you looked and.. she should stop thinking any further you clearly were mad at her, but why?
“I don’t know.”, the older Spanish woman shrugged equally as clueless.
“Weird.”, the forward mumbled.
“Let’s go the others are so thrilled to see you.”, Mapi tried to cheer her up.
“Hey, everyone.”, Kika begun anew, beaming at the teammates. Hoping, no praying, she wouldn’t cause a reaction like yours earlier. The dark haired forward didn’t want to ruin the first day at the new club anymore.
“Hi, welcome to the club.”, Claudia replied grinning.
���And thanks to special agent Aitana for this transfer who sadly can’t be here right now.”, Mapi continued, trying to soothe the fresh signing. It worked Kika did feel more relaxed in front of them.
“Guys calm down she still hasn’t proven herself in the team.”, you commented rolling your eyes, suddenly appearing next to Ingrid.
“I’m aware of how good this team is. But I’m sure I can help.”, the Portuguese swallowed hard, trying to sound as optimistic as possible.
“We’ll see about that.”, you shot back.
“Don’t worry you’ll.”, she promised. The football player was waiting for a response but once more you vanished without a trace. What a strange behaviour Kika thought to herself.
Thankfully Ellie delivered a much-needed distraction.
 “Kika? Ewa and I wanted to ask you if you’d join us for a coffee sometime soon? As we’re all new to the city.”  
“Yes, sure, I’d love that.”, she nodded happily.
Ellie beamed: “Wonderful.“
“Can’t wait.“, Kika smiled back at the young goalie.
Once again, you rolled your eyes and turned away from them to focus on your warm up.
You were one of the last to leave the pitch two hours later, thinking that you would have the dressing room for yourself. You did not expect Ingrid and Mapi waiting for you there.
“So?“, Ingrid said with her arms crossed in front of her chest.
You didn’t want to talk about your new team member so you decided to play along: “So what?“
With a half smile she finally formulated a question: “Why are you pouting?“
“I’m not pouting. Just annoyed by that smiley…“, you stopped yourself. You couldn’t come up with the right word for her anyway.
Mapi shook her head: “You’re not annoyed.“
At this point, you were starting to get annoyed with these two as well.
“Yes, I am. We didn’t need her in our team.“
“That’s not our decision though.“, Mapi shrugged.
You were about to say something but Ingrid was faster: “Y/n?“
You turned to her: “Yes?“
“Tell us why you’re mad at her.“
You heaved a frustrated sigh. They were worse than your parents.
“Remember when we drew against Benfica in Lisbon?“
Both of them nodded. Of course they would remember last years UWCL games. “Yeah?“
“What happened there? Why can’t you move on from it?“, Mapi asked.
Her girlfriend added: “Come on. It can’t be that bad. You can tell us.“
They looked at you with those soft eyes, all parent-like. Almost like your team psychologist.
The sudden urge to tell them disappeared completely so you just shrugged and grabbed your bag: “Whatever.“
You could feel their eyes on you as you left the dressing room, still in your workout clothes.
Ingrid looked at her incredulously: “Well, that was strange, Mapi.“
“Very.“, she agreed slowly.
As you went back to your own place, Kika and the other new players sipped on their coffees at a tiny little coffee shop.
“No, I’ll win her over with my charm, Ellie.“, Kika announced confidently. Even they had noticed the awkward tension between the two of you.
The English goalkeeper nodded slowly: “Sure you will, Kika.“
“Anyone wants some cake with their coffee?“, Ewa changed the topic. She had been eyeing the tasty looking sweet treats on display right from the start.
The Portuguese striker nodded: “Of course.“
“Can’t say no, they look delicious.“, Ellie laughed.
“We have to celebrate. It’s our first coffee date in our new home.“, Kika laughed.
Ewa stood up and agreed: “We do.“
She quickly returned with three different slices of cake so all of them could try.
“Knowing we play for such a prestigious club now feels great, right?“, she said as she sat the plates down on the table.
“This feels like a dream come true.”, the goalkeeper agreed with a dreamy look in her blue eyes.
It has always been something the blonde fantasized about since she was a little girl, playing for that club and now the fantasy turned into reality which she was forever grateful for.
When Ellie continued, she sounded serious. “Especially after the last year that I had.” The other two women knew about the stroke the English player had suffered.
That was why Kika pulled her into a soft hug whispering into the ear. You deserve to be here so much, Ellie.”
“Thanks. I’m happy that I got to start with you two.”, the goalkeeper smiled at her new teammates.
“Same. I’ve a feeling this will be a fantastic first season for us.”, Ewa replied enthusiastically.
“And we got each other if it’s getting hard.”, the Portuguese striker added.
“Yes, plus I’m sure even grumpy will like you eventually, Kika.”, Ellie remarked.
Immediately the smile vanished from the brunette’s face. “Not so sure about this. Apparently, I must have done something to her during our UWCL match last season.”
“But you don’t remember?”, Ewa questioned curiously. Quickly Kika shook her head.
“No.”
Although she tried her hardest to think what the striker could have done which made you hate her so much. Usually everyone warmed up under Kikas positive radiance, but you were her first exception, following her into her dreams.
In training Kika and you were much to your dismay supposed to be partners.
“Kika, I think Ill swap with Esmee.”, you declared.
“You can’t swap training partners.”, Mapi interjected in a tone which didn’t allow any dissent.
“Fine.”, you groaned. Even though you had played a few years in the first squad of Barca now aged 21 the defender was still like the big sister you never had, and you didn’t want to disappoint her. Even if it meant you needed to work with the person you disliked.
“Looks like you’re stuck with me.”, Kika observed, wearing a huge smile on her lips.
“Yes, with the one who showed me the middle finger last year.”, you muttered under her breath. Unfortunately, it was still loud enough for the striker to understand the words you were saying.
“I never did that!”, she objected loudly.
“Yes, you did.”, you responded.
“No way, I’d never do that.”, Kika insisted.
“And when you said something about the way I played.”, your voice trembled.
“That’s not true.”, the striker denied strongly.
“What’s true?”, you wanted to know.
“Nothing of what you think happened is true!”, she stated passionately.
Hearing her statement made your heart pound hard against your chest. “Are you saying that this is all a huge misunderstanding?”
Obviously!“, Kika said with emphasis and the slightest undertone of anger.
“Oh.“
You didn’t know what else to say. Was she telling the truth? Did it really only look like it at the pitch? Was it a gesture to you or her own teammate?
All the Champions League games seemed to blur together in front of your inner eye. Now you weren’t sure anymore.
“Wait… so you don’t hate me because I’m here and could potentially take your place in the starting squad?“, Kika asked.
You frowned at her: “No, we play two different positions. So why should I be afraid of that?“
“Because I know that you like to push forward too.“, she explained.
You stalled once again. You found it impressive that she had already analyzed your playing style.
You shook your head: “Yes. But I don’t hate your for that. I’m used to tough competition, Barca is my childhood club.“
“Okay… wow.“
“What?“
Kika started laughing: “I really thought you hated me because you had a good reason.“
At first you just glared at her for making fun of you but her laugh was incredibly infectious and you suddenly found yourself laughing with her.
“Stop laughing. This is a good reason!“, you told her as you playfully hit her arm.
“That’s not a good reason.“
“Come on. Focus on your exercise.“, you reminded her, still smiling.
Kika raised her hands defensively and grinned: “Okay, okay. Can’t make you mad at me again.“
“No. Also I have to maintain my grumpy status.“, you replied and tried your best to keep your face serious again.
Kika giggled: “Sorry, of course.“
“Good.“
“Don’t worry. I think I can handle your grumpiness.“
You squinted at her: “Might need some sunglasses to deal with your sunshiny attitude.“
“I know you love it.“, she winked at you. She really dared to wink at you!
You shook your head: “No, you’re still the most annoying person around here.“
“You don’t mean that.“
She was right. You didn’t.
Still, you continued to tease: “Are you sure?“
She flashed you a confident smile: “Yes.“
“Dream on.“
Kika shrugged casually and focused back on your partner exercise: “If you say so, y/n.“
After your talk, you didn’t feel that intense anger towards Kika anymore. Everything was a bit lighter once the misunderstanding was cleared up. It went even so far that you didn’t react with pure disgust when she asked you to room together at your first pre-season match against Hoffenheim.
“Can’t believe we’ve to share a room, Kika.“, you joked as you sat on one of the beds.
Kika threw herself onto the other one: “Quit complaining, you grump.“
You shrugged with amusement: “At least it’s just for one night.“
The Portuguese striker smiled: “You will survive. I’m a quiet sleeper.“
After you both changed into your pyjamas and brushed your teeth you happily let your head fall on to the soft pillow.
“Good night, Kika.”, you mumbled.
“Night y/n.”, the striker hummed.
Yet something was off, the heat in that southern part of Germany still hung in the room, plus Kika hasn’t stopped moving in her bed. 
“Can’t you sleep?”, you asked her with a heavy sigh.
“No, what about you?”, she returned the question, directing her gaze straight at you.
“Me neither.”, you admitted. There was some restlessness and tension between the two of you, it was almost unbearable.
“Do you want to talk?”, Kika offered kindly.
“Sure.”, you agreed softly.
“So, what keeps you up?”, the Portuguese wanted to know.
Even though the moonlight enhanced her features and made you think thoughts again you tried to avoid you started with a less heavy confession.
“The adrenaline of the win. I think I’ll never get tired of that feeling, what about you?”
You waited for her response, did you imagine it or did her cheeks turn red, it was hard to tell in the dark.
“Oh, yeah, I get that. I love it too. But there’s something else that keeps me awake.”, the brunette replied nervously.
“There’s? Are you missing Portugal?”, you listened up.
“A bit yes, but that’s not it. This might be a bad start for the new season, but there’s someone in this team that I think I’ve a crush on.”, Kika confessed.
“You do?”, you answered stunned.
“Yeah.”
For a moment you paused before the realization hit you hard.
“Wait, it’s me, right?”
“It’s yes.”, she confirmed quietly.
“That’s too bad because I.”, you begun.
“Oh, you don’t have to say anything, I get that. I didn’t want to ruin anything.”, the striker interrupted you quickly.
“No stop talking for a moment.”, you begged her, placing a finger of yours onto her lips. God, that woman really loved to talk, even though now the time clearly was for listening as you tried to demonstrate to her.
“I fell too.”, you added in a whisper.
“You did? Am I not way too annoying for you.”, Kika frowned.
“Yes, you’re and yet I’d like to kiss your mouth who loves to annoy me with it’s yapping.”, you grinned.
“You should give it a try maybe.”, she smirked.
“Maybe you can sleep better afterwards.”, you suggested playfully.
“Maybe we both can.”, your teammate wiggled her eyebrows.
“I’m sure of it.” First the kiss was cautiously before it was getting more intensely until you heard the door open loudly.
“Oh my god!”, Mapi yelled.
“Mapi, get out!”, you shrieked.
“I didn’t see anything. Promise!”, the defender gesticulated wildly. With that said she was gone as quick as the older woman came.
“This news will run like a wildfire, right?”, Kika chuckled.
“Yes, by tomorrow morning everyone knows.”, you groaned as she pulled you into a hug.
“I don’t mind that. They can know that grumpy and sunshine always belong together.”, she announced solemnly placing a soft kiss to your forehead.
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Note
Hii i was wondering if you could do the slashers with an s/o who likes being carried around everywhere (Brahms Bo and any others of your chosing)
slashers with an s/o who likes being carried around everywhere
mentioned: brahms heelshire, bo sinclair, thomas hewitt, stu macher, michael myers, tiny firefly
warnings: mentions of murder
a/n: thank you so much for the request, this was so fun to write!
also, i had to put tiny in here because i just love him so much :((
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brahms heelshire
the one thing brahms yearns for in his life is closeness, somebody who will never leave him
so when you express that you like to be carried around he can't really believe his luck
he loves being close to you and this is just another opportunity for just that
he'll probably carry you one of two ways; he'll either carry you in his arms bridal style, or he'll carry you chest to chest (i don't really know how to actually describe it)
he hates being alone so he loves being able to have you with him most of the time
he won't carry you around all the time though because he still has his own things to do
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bo sinclair
he hates it...or at least, he claims he does
bo usually spends his days alone, either working in the gas station or playing his part to lure unsuspecting victims into the town
he never really has much going on, and if he's being honest, it gets lonely
his brother vincent rarely comes out from his workshop and lester rarely has much to do with the town itself so he's left to his own devices most days, with nothing but his own mind to slowly drive him crazy
the second he discovers you like being carried everywhere, he takes a lot of enjoyment in doing exactly that
he doesn't really carry you properly, he kind of just drags you
it's somewhat like a half-assed piggy back
and although he'll spend the majority of the time grunting and groaning about it, cussing you out under his breath, he actually really loves finally having somebody so close to him
it certainly makes his days less lonely
whilst he's very uncaring though about how he carries you, if you're ill or you're injured, he'll make sure to be real careful with you
day to day though he really couldn't give a shit about being careful but he'll never admit to how much he loves carrying you
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thomas hewitt
thomas doesn't like being away from you much, so being able to carry you around is just a bonus for him
he takes every opportunity to pick you up and carry you places, even if you haven't asked
sometimes he'll pick you up bridal style and sometimes he'll simply sling you over his shoulder because it's easier
his family get on at him for doing it so much because you need to pull your weight and such and he's just letting you laze around but he doesn't listen to them
he continues to carry you around because he really just loves having you with him all the time
he hopes you never stop enjoying being carried everywhere because he loves it
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stu macher
he loves carrying you around
he's always offering to give you piggy backs
sometimes he'll take you by surprise and throw you over his shoulder and carry you like that
either way, he finds it fun to carry you around everywhere
he has requested a piggy back or two in the past though, which ultimately ended with you almost collapsing beneath him
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michael myers
he doesn't really care either way, but there's no way he'll put any effort into carrying you. you either hang off the back of his shoulders or nothing
michael's pretty strong so having you on his back wouldn't really affect his day to day activities
stalking his sister? no problem. you're not even there
murdering someone who happened to get in his way? he barely even notices you
simply walking down the street, having you on his back makes no difference as he simply couldn't care less
he does secretly enjoy having you with him though as he gets lonely sometimes
you're like a little companion he can just take with him wherever he goes
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tiny firefly
tiny likes to be helpful so he definitely doesn't mind carrying you around
he's used to anyone outside of his family shying away from him because of his appearance, so when he learns that you want him to carry you around places, he practically jumps at the chance
he loves that you're not afraid of him like most people and is honestly happy to help you out in this way
he enjoys having the company and he also enjoys being able to be close to you, so this is really a win win situation for you both
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[Main Masterlist]
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morosis-haze · 1 year
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Bakugou slowly moving you into his apartment
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𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: Katsuki Bakugou x fem!black reader
𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠: a curse word I believe that’s it
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❒ Bakugou who doesn’t really want to admit it, but he’s been getting used to your presence on those days you come over to the point he wants you to stay the night
❒ Bakugou who was asking or coming up with excuses on why you shouldn’t leave “There’s a few more episodes til we finish the season” You might as well stay on the couch cuddled up with him only a few more episodes until you could leave, right?
❒ It was all a plan leading to the “It’s late you should stay over tonight” He says it like he didn’t have you stay at his place until it was pitch black. How could you argue it was normal to not want your girlfriend out late there were a bunch of dangerous things that lurked the night, even if you’re also a pro hero who could defend yourself fine until you get home
❒ Bakugou who heard you talk about how multiple mornings and nights he is ruining your routine so he gets stuff you need
❒ It started small with him buying another toothbrush paired with a cover on it, it stood next to his in the cup. If you ask about it he’ll only say “So? You’re over here so damn much complaining about not having a toothbrush.” He acts as if you’re the one inviting yourself over
❒ “Maybe I’ll come over less.. y’know actually sleep in my apartment” You see his gaze flicker for a second before he grunts out “Well that’s not needed anymore” he moves onto a different topic ignoring the teasing smile on your face
❒ Bakugou kept slowly trying to move you in never mentioning it to you. He’d rather not deal with you being smug. That wasn’t gonna help though.
❒ Next time you come over to Bakugou's apartment you smell the scent of your favorite candle that said man had previously complained about when he was at your place “I thought you hated this scent” he looks at you as if he doesn’t know what you’re talking about “What scent?” You point to the recently burned-out candle “It grew on me” he rolls his eyes seeing you smile about it, but you can see the slight pull of one on his face
❒ You were both coming from a party a class 1a reunion if you will though there seems to be plenty of those as the students all got close over the years. Bakugou was the one who picked you up and was gonna drop you off home though he had different plans.
❒ You were busy about to post pictures of Mina and you along with the rest of the girls when you finally look up onto the road “Isn’t this the way to your apartment?” You glance at him as he continues “ ’m too tired to notice… you wanna just sleepover?”
❒ Maybe he really was tired and used to all the times of you staying over it was becoming an instinct. You were able to see the weary expression on his face and you didn’t wanna make him turn back around to drop you home so you’ll stay over…again
❒ Used to all the nights over here you go into one of his drawers planning on wearing something of his own but you notice everything in it is different it’s not a lot, but there were now a few clothes in your size and there were three bonnets in different colors and patterns
❒ “Katsuki are you changing your style?” He goes into his room raising an eyebrow at your question “You know I didn’t really take you for the bonnet kinda guy, especially one of this color but you do.” You picked up a patterned one a smug look on your face
❒ He huffs electing to ignore your comment too tired to be bothered he mutters “It’s for you” before he goes back into the bathroom letting you change in his room
❒ You get done changing and head to the bathroom knocking on the door before being allowed in you brush your teeth alongside him as you both finish up he nods to something on the counter you didn’t notice it was your favorite cleanser
❒ You both continue with your routines before heading to bed he seems to have a small smile on his face maybe because you aren’t complaining or seeing you look even slightly happier from his actions improved his mood
❒ The weeks continue you stay a little longer in the morning and you’re not as reluctant on staying the night. Bakugou gets more things for you, anything to make you more comfortable so maybe you could stay longer than last time
❒ Your favorite snacks were in his pantry, a duplicate of your lotion next to his so you no longer use up your travel-sized bottle from your purse, but what you weren’t expecting is the new silk pillowcases
❒ Bakugou may have overheard Mina talking about her new pillowcases and how they’re so amazing, as he listened it sounded like it could benefit you so he looked into it
❒ Sure he could’ve just given them to you for your own bedroom, but he used them in his even though the purpose of them being here is for you
❒ “I can’t tell if you’re getting bougie or if you genuinely wanted silk pillowcases..” you joked looking at the man as he climbed into his bed with you “They’re good for your hair and shit” “Good for my hair… you got silk pillowcases because of me?” He doesn’t look at you as he answers “There are other benefits it’s not just cause of you...”
❒ There goes a smug expression returning back to your face “Careful I might just stay here forever, Katsuki” You give him his goodnight kiss before laying down as he turns off the lights you hear him say “Maybe that’s what I want”
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𝐀/𝐍: Back from the hiatus I’ll be redoing my taglist so if you want to join it fill out this form
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sugawhaaa · 2 months
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ATEEZ SMUT REACTION *ੈ✩‧₊˚
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☆~[You hurt yourself trying to deep throat]~☆
Warnings:: SMUT, Gagging/choking...yeahh
Pairing:: reader is written to have some female features
A/N:: this is like one of my biggest insecurities bc my gag reflex is so bad to the point I struggle to eat sometimes 😬 its embarrassing
Ateez h/c masterlist: ‧͙⁺˚*・༓☾
Taglist:: @mingisbbg @lezleeferguson-120 @minihong99
Hongjoong
Hongjoong had kept reminding you to take it slow and you had all night to try this new activity but you couldn't wait. Despite his voice being so gentle and warm you couldn't listen. You take him further into your mouth, feeling his tip push down to your throat. You whimper softly and Hongjoong gently rubs the back of your head in comfort.
"Go slow baby, it's okay," he speaks in a low but soft voice, his breathing shaking. You then push all the way down his shaft and Hongjoong gasps. You gag hard and slip off of him coughing softly. "Oh baby come here," he brings his arms out to you and lifts you up into a hug. You continue to cough and he rubs your back. "Would you like some water?" He asks softly and you nod.
He grabs the water from the nightstand and hands it to you. "There you go. You did so good I'm so proud of you," he kisses your shoulder softly. "Such a good job," he continues to rub your back and you smile softly at his words.
"You think so?" You blush and look down.
"Yes my love," he kisses your cheek. "Blow jobs aren't all about taking it all in your mouth and gagging shit. You can take it slow and steady and it will still feel like heaven," he explained with a warm smile.
Seonghwa
Your jaw was exhausted. Seonghwa and you were trying a new little game or some people would call role-play. Basically Seonghwa was torturing you all night but not with toys and edging. He was using his own cock to torture you. He started with facials, like three in a row, before tit-fucking, and now he was fucking your face.
At first it was fine and you kinda loved the idea of him rocking his hips into your face but eventually you felt your throat starting to weaken and the sense of pleasure was fading away. You squint your eyes shut and Seonghwa's grip on your hair falters. He continued to move your head to the rhythm of his hips but once he saw your eyes watering he instantly let go.
"Hey baby, are you okay?" He bent down a little to check on you. You wipe away a tear and nod. "Are you sure?" He pets your head softly as he kneels down to your level. You pout softly and you find yourself crying more. Seonghwa's heart shatters and he pulls you into a hug. "My love, come here," he plays with your hair as he holds you against his chest. "What are the water works for?" He asks with concern etched in his voice.
"I'm just tired," you sigh in his arms and he smiles softly, glad to hear he didn't hurt you.
"I understand baby. You tried a lot of new things tonight," he kisses your forehead before sweeping you up bridal style. "Do you want to rest for the night or do you need some attention?" He asks as he sets you down on the bed.
"Relaxed sex..." you say softly and he chuckles.
"Alright darling" he kisses your forehead again.
Yunho
Yunho was always up for challenges and something more during sex. If you asked to try anything he would happily give it to you or let you have your way with him. That's how you got here.
Your head was up against the wall, a pillow situated behind it, and Yunho's cock stood in front of you, twitching slightly. You opened your mouth nice and wide and he eased his cock into your mouth. He slowly began to thrust into your mouth and at first, it felt strangely erotic, pleasurable. But after a while you felt the gagging starting to get to you. Yunho didn't pick up on this however.
He knew you were also up for a bit of challenge so he pushed you a little bit but when he saw you starting to not just physically cry from gagging but emotionally crying he pulled out of your mouth and crouched down to you. "Baby, baby, look at me. What's wrong?" He held your face as you cried softly. "Come here," he pulled you into a hug and you hid your face in his shoulder. "Why are you upset my love? Did it hurt?" He rubs your back.
"A little...I just wish I could do better," you look at the ground and Yunho shakes his head.
"No baby don't say that," he holds your face to look up at him. "Listen to me. You are so fucking amazing and gorgeous. You are the best partner in the entire world I could've asked for," he rubs your cheek softly. "You are amazing," he kisses your forehead and holds you against his chest again. "Let's stop this. What do you want to do tonight?"
Yeosang
Yeosang lazily holds your head as you bob up and down his length. Low distorted groans escaped his lips as he watched you through hooded eyes. This morning you decided to wake him up with a little blow job as a "Good morning" and to help with his nearly constant morning wood. However, he was still groggy and not fully awake yet.
"Fuck baby, keep going~" he moaned in his low morning voice that made you get excited yourself. The sounds of you slurping and sucking sounded like heaven to his ears. He fell back against the bed as his hand lazily rested on the back of your head. He wasn't even guiding you or moving you in any way, he was just resting there.
As he started to wake a bit more you decided to test a little something. You began to deep throat him, taking him all the way down before moving your lips back up just to his tip before repeating. Every time you went down again his whole body jerked forward and you would gag on him. "Baby-I fuck," any sentence he tried to form only became a slur of words and you soon found out why.
As you plummeted back down again you felt his hot seed shoot to the top of your throat. He held your head down as his body shuddered. You squinted your eyes shut before choking on the warm liquid.
Yeosang didn't realize it at first but when you started whimpering and hitting his thigh he looked down at you and let your head go. You sat up coughing and Yeosang lunged forward. "Y/N," he put his hand on your shoulder as you coughed. "I'm sorry baby," he moved his hand down to rub your back. "Shh, it's okay," he put his head down to the side of yours. You take a few deep breaths before relaxing again. He smiles up at you softly.
"Sorry I didn't mean for it to go like that," you look down and Yeosang shakes his head.
"No, no baby none of that," he kisses your forehead. "I am the one who is sorry. I should've realized," he kisses you on your lips softly. "I love you baby, I'm sorry for hurting you,"
San
San wasn't usually one to press for things but rough blow jobs were something he always loved. As of right now, he was trying to hold back smashing your face into his hips. Like it was driving him crazy. Eventually he caved in, tightening his grip around your hair and guiding your head a bit more forcefully.
"That's it, relax your throat," he said between low groans of pleasure. The wetness of your mouth drove him wild, the way he could feel the back of your throat tightening everytime he pushed deeper. He found himself falling deeper into the pleasure to the point he just started forcing your head down his shaft.
It wasn't until cum was pouring from the side of your lips that he came back from his rush of pleasure. He looked down and saw your pathetic state. Tears rolled down your cheeks as you looked up at him with an expression that said "Please stop" San instantly let you go and as you gasped for air the guilt set in. "Baby, I'm so sorry, I didn't even realize," he says as he scoops his arms around you. "I'll never do that again," he promised as he held you close.
He showers you with kisses as he holds you. "How about you ride my face in return? As an apology?" He looks up at you eagerly.
"No San, it's okay I promise," you chuckle softly but San is already lying down urging you to come over.
"Cmon, just for a minute,"
Mingi
Mingi knew he had a bigger cock than the average person but he couldn't stop himself. You just looked so good with his cock stuffed into your mouth, tears poking at your eyes, ugh it got him so good.
He grabbed a fist full of your hair as he pushed your head down. "That's it, take it all," he moans loudly as you fit him all in your mouth. You whimper softly but refuse to use your safe action. "Oh you are being so fucking good, yeah," he groans as he begins to buck his hips against your face. The sound of you gagging on his size made a shiver run down his spine that basically possessed him.
He grabs the sides of your head and begins to thrust into it, your throat squelching as he did so. "Yes baby, relax your throat," he groans before holding your head right against his stomach as he cums. You hit his thigh a few times rapidly, using your safe action and he lets your head go. You slip him out of your mouth and cough harshly, gasping for air in between.
The guilt then hits Mingi like a tidal wave. "Oh baby," he kneels down next to you on the floor. "Come here my darling. I'm so sorry," he rubs your back as you cough harshly. His face shows visible pain at the sound of your coughing. "I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry," he pulls you into his lap. "I won't do that again I promise," he said as he wiped away some cum and drool slipping your lips and down your chin. "Shh, your okay," he pats the back of your head comfortingly. "Never again baby,"
"It's okay Mingi...I'll get used to it," you reassure him and he shakes his head.
"No baby. I never wanna see you like this again,"
Wooyoung
Wooyoung was the biggest fan of blow jobs in probably the entire world so of course he would never say no to his baby wanting to try deep throating.
You were casually sucking him off as he curled up in his blankets and pillows. This intimate moment was calm and relaxed. Most of the time you and Wooyoung were freaky as hell. Saying dirty things, forcing the other to spit on their genitals, hair pulling, bed creaking it was all there. But tonight Wooyoung laid back and let you have his way with him. Things were calm and sweet until you stuffed him down your throat abruptly.
Wooyoung jumps and moans softly. "B-Baby," he whimpered as you swayed your head back and forth, his tip rubbing against the very back of your throat. It made you gag softly but you pulled through. You carefully slipped him out of your mouth and he sighed softly. You coughed quietly, trying to cover up your discomfort but Wooyoung noticed.
He gave you a certain look that you couldn't describe with words. It was just a look that told you that he was okay with whatever you could handle, don't push yourself. You still did the opposite. You took him in your mouth again and bobbed your head, gagging continuously and Wooyoung gritted his teeth. "Ah, baby, don't-" he got cut off by his own moans. "Don't push yourself," he rubs your head as he feels your throat flex around him.
Wooyoung couldn't take it anymore and pulled back his hips while forcibly lifting your head up. You cough harshly as tears pour down your cheeks and Wooyoung shakes his head before bringing your head down to his chest. "Don't do that baby, don't hurt yourself," he pets your head as he hushes you.
"I wanted to make you feel good," you whimper softly and Wooyoung's heart sinks.
"Oh my baby, there are so many other better ways to make me feel good. You can still stay in control or not, there are hundreds of ways," he holds the sides of your face as he speaks. He brushes his thumb over your cheek, wiping away the tear. "Come on now my love," he kisses your neck tenderly.
Jongho
Messy sex with Jongho was nothing new in your relationship. He always loved lots of spit, cum, and other bodily fluids all over the place. Whether it be sweat or tears the two of you had seen it on each other countless times so when you were taking him in your mouth he wasn't surprised to see tears rolling down your cheeks.
It was a natural human response to gagging so to him, as long as you were still going he trusted you. He held your head softly but allowed you to do as you pleased. That was until he was nearing the edge. He couldn't hold himself back as he slammed your head down against the base of his cock, your throat milking his cock. His cum spurts out down your throat and you choke on it as well as gagging from the length of his cock.
Jongho noticed your distress and pulled back. You turned to the side and coughed harshly, cum dripping down your chin. Jongho honestly didn't know what to do. He hurt you so bad and he didn't mean to. He put his hand on your back and just let you cough. "Let it out baby, you're okay," he soothed you softly as you coughed. You found yourself calming down and you sighed. You lay back against the bed sheets and Jongho follows you. "I'm so sorry my love I didn't mean to hurt you. I just got so caught up in everything," he strokes your face softly.
"Did you feel good?" You ask softly and he hesitates.
"Yes baby, but it wasn't worth it," he explains. "You did such a good job but I don't want to see you like this again. We're not doing this again," he shakes his head and you sigh softly. He pulls you into his arms. "You did so good," he kisses the top of your head and holds you tight against him.
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luvvyouforever · 9 months
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headcanons : harry potter boys x keeper!reader
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↳ harry, ron, draco, neville, fred, george, remus, and sirius with a partner who can wield ancient magic (hogwarts legacy style).
↳ requests are open! submit ideas, drabbles, headcanons, or one shots to the link in my bio! don’t be shy <3
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
harry potter:
-thinks it is the coolest shit ever! when you're in a fight together and you protect him by shooting a powerful blue bolt towards the enemy that disintegrates their very beginning, he feels so proud to be your partner!
-on the other side, he also knows it feels like to have a lot of pressure and power on your side. he worries about what it must feel like to wield ancient magic and be the only living person who can see it. every time you use it, he checks on you after, ensuring that you don't feel too exhausted and can continue fighting.
-supported you so much through the trials. he didn't need to know every detail of what you did and went through but he would hold you so tight when you came back, praising you over and over for being so strong and brave.
ron weasley:
-he's a little jealous, ngl. like his partner can use this sick magic and is responsible for keeping the magic safe and alive out of the wrong hands?? why can't he do that???
-i also feel like ron would be confused, if not a little angry, that you refuse to share the power and attempt what others have before (such as isidora using the magic to remove pain). he doesn't really understand the problem and feels like the keepers are suspicious.
-he'd brag about you alllllll the time though! like oh my god every second he would find some way to bring up the fact that you can do really awesome things and that you are his awesome partner forever!
draco malfoy:
-draco loves you a lot and finds your magic incredibly cool, don't get me wrong, but i think his family swayed his pursuit of you because wouldn't it be so grand if the malfoys had a keeper in their family? someone so powerful and knowledgeable? who would pass down the truth and their magic? yes please! (every time narcissa brings it up, it irks draco but also he pats himself on the shoulder for choosing you)
-wants to know every detail about the trials and the past and the memories you're viewing! you'll come back from a trial, sweaty and tired, maybe bleeding, and he'd help you first then ask hundreds of questions after.
-your use of ancient magic is not necessarily unknown and makes you quite popular among the students of hogwarts. this, however, makes draco really jealous. if he could, he would follow you everywhere, glaring down anyone who tries to make a move on you. before you go on adventures, classes, or just to the common room, he'll drape you in his slytherin scarf as if he was marking you.
neville longbottom:
-poor thing gets so nervous when you have to complete the trials or do something incredibly important for the sake of keeping the magic safe. he knows he can't go along with you but he'd stay by your side until the very moment you enter the map chamber, whispering praises and support the whole time.
-would heal up all your wounds and take care of you if you exerted too much during a fight. he knows how much everyone depends on you and the least he can do is take care of you properly! he would run you a bath, apply soothing balms to your skin or use his plants to heal you up, and cuddle you tightly!
-tries his hardest to not feel useless but sometimes it's hard when you're so strong and he's so...not. of course you'll always reassure him and give him the confidence he needs but very frequently, he gets really down on himself about it.
fred weasley:
-every day he comes to you with a new scheme that involves your magic. could you make a portal that leads from the dungeons of hogwarts to the top of the astronomy tower? it's important. snape is gonna get really mad when he goes into his office? can your magic fix that?
-begs, and i mean BEGS, you to let him come along on your adventures and battles. he wants nothing more than to support you and fight along your side! as long it's not a trial, you can't help but let him come along. you usually end up saving him after he pays a little more attention to the way your whip around the battle, taking down everyone effortlessly.
-speaking of paying too much attention to you, he thinks it is so attractive than you can do what you do! he gives you some time after fighting to recuperate but then immediately he is ON you. he's kissing you and telling you how hot it is when you turn someone to just particles.
george weasley:
-he wants you to teach him everything you can. there are some things that are just simply innate and can not be taught but all your tips and tricks when it comes to fighting will now be all of his tips and tricks. you two would just find some field away from the burrow and go at it, sending spell after spell at each other. georgie is just overflowing with adrenaline and it's a great way to get it out.
-deep down, a part of him wants to be protective of you. he wants to keep you from going out into danger and taking on dangerous tasks all for magic and some old people telling you what to do. but he knows better, trust me. he knows you can defend yourself just fine but he just wants to put you in a little bubble and never let anything hurt you.
-just like ron, he will brag about you whenever he can. everyone is sitting around the great hall table, talking about how it's so cool that you defeated a troll in one fell swoop and he just wraps his arm around your shoulders, a glimmer in his eye as he proceeds to say "yeah, aren't they just so amazing?"
remus lupin:
-fears for your health and safety so much! when you come back from a trial, he's hushing you and putting you in bed, feeding you chocolate and brewing tea until you feel better!! you are bearing the weight of centuries old magic all alone. the least he can do is take care of you!
-supports your decisions throughout your entire journey as a keeper. if you truly believe that releasing ancient magic to the world and using it for more than the original keepers intended, then he understands. if you want to continue to keep it hidden, he will not question your judgement.
-this is so fluffy but i feel like you figured out how to manipulate your ancient magic to floating, bright blue scenes and pictures. around remus's time of the month (said lovingly), you'll lay in bed with him and use your wand to paint pictures of animals, lakes, waves, stars, or, in more sappy moments, your future.
sirius black:
-he thinks it is SO hot that you can take someone down without barely blinking an eye. his favorite move you do is when you lift someone into the air and slam them down repeatedly. gets blushy and turned on excited every time.
-once followed you down into the map chamber only to be very harshly yelled at by one of the keeper's portraits. he just wanted to see what it looked like and to know where you go on dangerous missions!! who can blame him, truly? definitely grumbled the whole rest of the day.
-when you two get married, he refuses to let you take his last name and instead will either take yours or say screw it and come up with one! he doesn't want his family to have the gratification of having a keeper with the black family name. he wants you to shine for who you are and in another century, he wants your name to be yours, not his.
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